#like. as someone who has schizophrenic friends

[crippled-peeper]

I know its not much, but it means a lot to me that u weren’t ablest on that post abt ur schizophrenic neighbor. So many people just shit on us and call us crazy.

I don’t have it in my heart to hate someone who is clearly living in his own hell and seemingly without any friends or family

that situation was scary, obviously, nobody wants to get chased or threatened outside of their home especially if you have 11 metal joints

But once everything quieted down and he explained to the authorities he was paranoid, having hallucinations, and was convinced I was stalking him, I realized that my idea of a shitty day is way different than his.

I can’t imagine looking out my door/window every day and wondering if someone is out there trying to get me. I can’t imagine being so terrified of a stranger because your brain has convinced you they know you and want to get you

like yes it sucked. It shouldn’t have happened and was very dangerous . he should have more people on his side watching out for him - But as a fellow disabled person without a family, I can’t exactly place the blame on him that he doesn’t have these things. nobody wakes up one day and decides to not have a social support system anymore. he has clearly been struggling with this for a while. I don’t think he needs punishment, I think he needs a lot of help he’s not getting.

I hope that if we do interact again we can interact as neighbors and he doesn’t see me as the scary evil person he thought I was. I am getting pepper spray keychain just in case though I really doubt he’ll come after me again after the conversations we had yesterday

[transfemsamwinchester]

saw a tiktok about a schizophrenic man committing a violent hate crime and a lot of the comments were fearmongering about schizophrenic people in general, not the specific situation. and it just got me thinking about how schizophrenia is treated in media and the news, how you only hear about schizophrenic people when they’ve committed a violent crime, how society says these people need to be locked up in mental institutions for their own good, and like. i feel like people don’t understand that bodily autonomy applies to everybody. yes, even truly awful people. and truly awful people who happen to be mentally ill are not awful because of their mental illness, the two are totally unrelated. obviously, someone who’s committing violent hate crimes should not be allowed to continue to do those crimes. but just because a person poses a threat, the way to neutralize that threat is not involuntary commitment. because when you start to shove the “bad” crazy people in mental institutions against their will, that opens the gates for all mentally ill people to be institutionalized.

[shewroteaworld]

I'll Hold Your Weight When You Can't

Premise: Brilliant sunshine!reader gets heat stroke on a case. Your best friend, Spencer Reid, is predictably worried about you. What he doesn't expect is to be forced to come to terms with his feelings for you.

Word count: approx. 3,200

TW: Brief mention of vomit and, perhaps, hospitals

(Y/N/N): Your nickname

Author's Note: Super excited to introduce brilliant sunshine!reader (aka, super smart sunshine!reader) onto my fanfic writing scene! Definitely willing to write more of her in the future if anyone is interested. Hope you enjoy!

“Does anybody have more water?”

“Where is the damn ambulance?”

Perhaps your job classically conditioned you to respond to Hotch’s “I’m seriously not fucking around” tone because your eyes crack open. 

Someone put weights on your eyelids and cranked the sun to extra-bright. The harsh rays burned your retinas and washed everything in a white blur. Did someone set off a flash bang?

“(Y/N)? Can you hear me?” Miraculously, out of the screeching white, you made out JJ’s halo of blonde hair. 

“JJ?” You groaned. Even though you could barely see, it felt like the whole world was spinning, 

“Hotch, she’s coming around!” You recognized Morgan’s voice. “Welcome back to the world of the living, honey. We’re happy to see you.”

Your heart rate spiked. You never died. Did you die? 

“Yes, we still need a medic!” Hotch barked. 

You winced. “Wha?” Suddenly, your mouth couldn’t handle a one-syllable world. Even more alarming, your brain, the same brain that kept up with Emily Prentiss and Spencer Reid,  couldn’t understand what the hell was going on.

 “What I do?” You whined. 

“He’s not yelling at you, honey,” JJ said like a kindergarten teacher. “You’re just a little out of it right now.”

“Is she conscious?” Another voice entered. Your head spun. “I brought more water.” 

You moaned to suppress a gag. Your eyelids drooped, and you relished in the break from the light.

“Hey, smarty pants, stay with us.” Morgan pat your cheek. “Let Emily get some water in you.” You couldn’t force your eyes open more if you tried.

Your friend Emily. That’s who the voice belonged to. 

Suddenly, JJ pulled your hair from your face, Morgan lifted your head, and Emily forced a water bottle to your lips simultaneously.  The blinding glare seared your eyes and your head spun. You wanted to sob and maybe vomit.

Your chest hitched with a shallow inhale. “Stop.” You whined.

“(Y/N), it’s okay. Take a deep breath.” JJ said.

“No!” You exclaimed.

“Honey–” Morgan tried. 

You thrashed against his hold, but your exhausted muscles couldn’t throw Morgan’s gentlest grip. 

“Maybe we should let her go.” Emily said.

“She needs water.” JJ countered.

“She’s disoriented.” Hotch cut in. “Let her get her bearings first, but don’t let her close her eyes.”

Gingerly, Morgan lay your body back on the grass. Your head swam, and your vision rippled as if you could see the heat waves in the California air. You tried to take a deep breath but choked.  

You sputtered. Every inhale led to a series of dry coughs. In your delirium, you thought of Spencer. Your Spencer. Where the hell was he? Did he not love you anymore?

Suddenly, Hotch loomed over you. His tall frame blocked out the brutality of the sun’s glare, which eased your headache and nausea but not your cough. His eyebrows were so deeply furrowed they formed a trench of wrinkles across his forehead. “Check her airway.” 

Suddenly, you stared into JJ’s blue eyes. Other hands tried to manipulate your body. You jerked.

“(Y/N), relax.”

“Honey, please–”

“Turn her on her side!” Morgan’s cut off by Reid, his voice sharper than you’d ever heard. 

***

Spencer Reid has survived many traumatic situations. 

He's cared for his schizophrenic mother. He’s been kidnapped. He recovered from a drug addiction. And those are just a few items from his dissertation-length “PTSD-Causing Experiences” list. 

But many of his worst traumas were a by-product of being a profiler– a job which allowed him to utilize his intellect to help others. He was willing to accrue trauma like Pokemon cards in exchange for applying his genetic gifts to create a safer world. 

Reid could have framed your heat exhaustion as another scare in the line of duty. But when Reid saw you, his brilliant girl, on the ground, his heart fell through his feet.

Then, he saw how his the team responded to your medical emergency.

When he witnessed you coughing and writhing on your back as the team leered over with water, he thought he might explode.

You could be asphyxiating, and the team could be letting you choke while forcing more fluid down your throat. 

He shivered as he sprinted down the steps of the local precinct and onto the grassy field where you lay. 

“Turn her on her side!” He yelled as diagnoses and courses of action fled through his mind on hyperspeed.

“We’re trying, she—”

“Spence?” You choked out through a coughing fit. He’s surprised his ears caught it.

Reid knelt next to you. “Let’s get you into recovery position.” He said, his voice suddenly soft as clouds. Reid gingerly pushed you onto your left side. “Off your back, there we go.” He bent your right leg and slid it in front of your body to prevent you from rolling onto your stomach if you lost consciousness. 

“Did she faint?” Reid asked the team. He couldn’t take his eyes from your face. 

“We think so. She was dizzy, so she laid on the ground. Then she was unresponsive for at least 40 seconds,” Emily said. 

Spencer pressed the back of his hand to your forehead. Predictably, you were feverishly hot. “She’s burning up. Has someone called an ambulance?”

“Allegedly.” Hotch said, an edge to his voice. 

“We have, sir. They’re on their way.” A local police officer responded, exasperated.

Spencer’s eye twitched. “How long has she been down?” You whined, and he stroked your cheekbone with his thumb.

“It’s okay, sweetheart.” He whispered. 

“In total, 15 minutes.” Hotch supplied. “Emily, pour some more water on her.”

“This was for her to drink.”

“Use one bottle to pour on her face and neck.” Spencer said. “I ran and got Gatorade. She should start with sips of that when she can swallow. Heat stroke can also be caused by salt depletion.” 

Spencer was conversing with a local officer over the safety protocols in the area when a pair of policemen walked into the precinct, gossiping about the FBI agent who “folded fast in the southern Cali heat.”

Spencer’s jaw had clenched. Maybe one of his team members was ill since they put in most of the grunt work to catch the unsub. He would’ve been more annoyed if not for the worry gnawing at his brain. What if they were talking about (Y/N)? She looked a little shaky right after her chase with the unsub, but Spencer didn’t get a chance to ask his friend if she was alright. And, stupidly enough, he forgot to text her to check if she drank any water post-case. Quickly, Reid excused himself, grabbed a Gatorade from the fridge, and rushed to the field where your limp body trembled on the grass. 

“I’m going to pour some water on you, honey," Emily said. You flinched as the frigid water hit your hairline. 

“Breathe, relax.” Spencer said, shielding your nose. The last thing you needed was some accidental waterboarding.

Seconds after the water drenched your forehead, your whole body relaxed into the grass. “That felt good.” You smiled weakly. 

Spencer stroked your arm. “Let’s sit you up in a minute, okay? You should try some Gatorade before the EMTs get here.”

“EMTs? I’m fine.” You whined.

Spencer didn’t think it was possible for his eyebrows to crease further. 

“You’re not fine.” Gentler, he said, “and it’s okay not to be fine, sunlight.”

“But, I’m alive.” You tried to roll onto your stomach, but your bent leg kept you safe on your back.

Some on the team members chuckled, but Spencer didn’t find your delirium humorous. “I know you’re alive, sweetie. But you’re way too hot. I think you’re a little confused right now.”

“I’m just…” You winced. “I’m alive.”

The knot in Spencer’s chest tightened ten-fold. This could be heat stroke. At the very least, you had heat exhaustion. You were dehydrated. You were delirious. 

Best case scenario: you were ill for a few days. Worst case scenario: You had vital organ damage.

Just as he’s about to call 911 himself, JJ interrupted him. “Look–ambulance lights. Help is on the way, honey.”

“You hear that, (Y/N)? You’re gonna be fine.” Morgan said. If only Spencer felt that confident. 

“Spence…” You blocked your eyes from the light with your limp right hand. “I’m scared. I don’t feel well.” 

“Oh, (Y/N), I know.” He cupped your shoulder and hoped you could feel his love for you through his palm. That sent a jolt down his spine. He wasn’t supposed to comfortably think those thoughts about you.

You were sick. This wasn’t the time. He leaned over your body. He gave you plenty of breathing room, but his torso was  parallel to your hip so his eyes could meet your watering ones. “Hey, take a breath for me, Smartie.” 

Your nickname for him slipped from his tongue so easily it spooked him. Suddenly, he noticed his thumb stroking over your cotton t-shirt. He should stop. The whole team was watching. He was being was too intimate; he'd face stupid quips from Morgan for days. He kept stroking anyway.

He observed your chest rise and fall. Your breaths were shaky but deeper. He relaxed a tad. Vital oxygen was reaching your bloodstream.

“(Y/N), can we try something?” Spencer asked.

“Yes. Maybe. What is it?”

The knot in his chest loosened. You responded immediately and with more than two words; you were becoming more lucid. 

“Can you sit up and have some sips of Gatorade? I got your favorite flavor. At least, if your favorite flavor hasn’t changed from three years ago.” It most likely hadn’t. Once your opinion settled, it was frustratingly hard to erode your verdict. 

“I can’t…I don’t know.”

“I know sitting up is hard. I’ll help you. And I’ll prop you against my chest. I’ll hold your weight when you can’t.”

“KK, Spence.” Your childlike tone tugged at his heart strings.

Spencer and Morgan lifted your limp body from the ground. They manhandled you into a sitting position with your head propped on Spencer’s shoulder and your body tucked between his thighs. 

One of his arms stabilized you while the other raised a cold bottle of orange Gatorade to your lips.

After nine sips of Gatorade, you spoke again. 

“Orange.” You took another sip. "My favorite.”

He smiled into your hair. “When have I ever lied to you, (Y/N/N)?”

***

Spencer nearly created a crater in the linoleum floor of the ER waiting room with his bouncing heel by the time the doctor came back with an update. 

“She had a mild case of heat stroke. We currently have her on fluids, and she’ll need lots of rest for at least the next week.” Doctor Bahamani concluded. 

“No signs of metabolic dysfunction? Any respiratory distress?” Reid checked. 

Doctor Bahamani smiled knowingly. “She’s going to be just fine, Doctor Reid.”

“Can I see her?” Spencer asked. 

“Yes. Only two at a time, please.” 

Spencer didn’t care who volunteered with him. He moved without thinking. An outpouring of gratitude for his eidetic memory flooded him. Through the thickest brain fog, he could trust his recollection of the hospital to bring him to the correct hospital room.

The security staff practically had to drag him away from your bedside after the ambulance ride. They might have thrown him out of the ER if not for the flash of his FBI badge.

Something nagged at him as he sped past the nursing station. 

You were going to be fine. The ER doctor confirmed it. Yet his heart was still pounding and he could barely refrain from running. Even more odd, he wasn’t ashamed of his irrational behavior. 

So what if a doctor deemed you were okay? It was you. And he saw you groggier and more out of it than you'd ever been. And who knows how thorough the doctors were with their examination? It was completely reasonable to worry for one of his closest friends. 

He just couldn't believe you were alright until he checked you over with his own hands and his own eyes.

***

When you grinned at him from your cot, Spencer wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry.

Tears glazed your eyes. But, your gorgeous smile was back. 

“Spencer?” You asked, brow raised and head cocked. 

He’d been staring too long. He looked like an idiot, lamely standing in the doorway as if he were the one with heat stroke.

“Straighten your head. Your neck is probably tight.”

You smiled, but this time it was tight-lipped and painful-looking. “You’re too worried.”

He watched saline drip down your IV. “Of course I’m worried, (Y/N). You got heat stroke.” With a deep breath as a shot of courage, he sat in the chair by the head of your bed.

There was nothing odd about sitting with his best friend at the hospital. 

His chest twisted at “best friend” and his resolve collapsed. He couldn’t deny it anymore. 

He liked you. He really, really liked you. He actually might even–

“Luckily, I got out pretty unscathed.” You snapped Spencer out of his spiral. “A little dehydrated. Achy. Might feel sick for a few days.”

“Or weeks.” Spencer corrected.

“Trying to look on the bright side here, Doctor.” You smirked and Spencer swore his right ventricle tightened.

Then, your nose scrunched and Spencer's wiped clean of any concern about his cardiac health. 

“What hurts?”

“Just a little achy, Spencer. I’m alright.” 

He shot you a look. He knew all your excuses. He knew you went to self-harming lengths to not worry people. 

“You’re not alright.” He reached for the red nurse-call button. 

Your eyes widened in surprise. “Okay…my body aches, Spence. And the IV burns. But they’ve already told me that’s normal. No need to take nurses away from an emergency.”

The nurses at the station desk didn’t appear to be rushing around for anyone, but Spencer feared this wouldn’t behoove his case. 

“They can give you pain medication, if you want.”

You hesitated, and immediately Spencer pressed the button. When you smiled weakly instead of bickering, his worry grew tenfold but not without a rush of heat flooding his entire body. 

In Morgan's words, he’s down bad. 

“How are you doing, sunshine?” As if he’d been summoned, Morgan appeared in the doorway. 

Spencer stepped back from your cot. The part of him riled from Morgan’s “sunshine” moniker wants to shove his hand into yours. Spencer thought he hid his annoyance well, but something about Morgan's smirk told him otherwise.

“Um…”

Morgan’s smirk fell. “You feel that bad, huh?”

You chuckled sadly. “Do I look that shitty or am I an open book today?”

“You never look shitty,” Spencer said. A tsunami of blood rushed to his face.

“Anyway,” Morgan said, “Do you want anything, Beauty Queen? I can grab you some jello.” 

“Jello sounds nice.” You said, and something in your voice was so vulnerable and naive Spencer wanted to wrap you in his arms as tight as he could. Which was illogical. That would only hurt you further. 

He shook his head as if that would remove the thoughts from his mind. “I’m gonna see if I can check up on your labs at the nurse’s station. I’ll make sure they’re giving you the good drugs.” He smiled.

You laughed– a genuine laugh– and Spencer’s heart soared. “Thanks, Spence.”

“I’ll go grab your jello,” Morgan said.

“Hold on, you should stay with her just in case she needs anything," Spencer said.

“I’ll be fine, Spence.” You said, but Spencer was not prepared to take "no" for an answer.

“If you boys wants to run her some errands, I’ll stay.” Emily stood in the doorway. “JJ is coming soon too– she just got a phone call from a very frantic Penelope.”

Your nose crinkled. “Oh no.” You groaned, but you were smiling. 

“Oh, yes. Be prepared for some mother henning," Emily said.

“Garcia can’t be any more mother henning than Reid," Morgan said. 

Before his face could turn redder than a baboon’s bottom, Spencer fled.

He’s only two yards from the nursing station when Morgan intercepted him at the end of the hall. 

“So, you’re going to make your move, right?”

Spencer's body temperature plummeted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He tried to shoulder past Morgan, but he was no match for his grip strength. “Reid, c’mon. You like (Y/N).”

Part of him wanted to laugh. “Like” seemed too simple of a word to describe the symphony of feelings (Y/N) started in him. “It’s…” He’s too tongue-tied to lie. “It’s complicated.”

You’re brilliant. You’re beautiful. You’re brimming with empathy. You’re everything Spencer could want. And it scared the shit out of him. Because that meant there’s even more to lose. And if he lost you, there would be no one to blame but himself. It was better for his psyche to not go there with you– to step back from the line rather than risk what would happen if he failed to make it work in the end. 

And what if you got hurt? What is you fell in the line of duty? Or worse, what if someone targeted you because of your romantic tie to him? Spencer's already experienced the pain of losing a soulmate-- a concept he wasn't even sure he believed in-- once. He wasn't not sure if he could survive it a second time.

There was too much unpredictability in his life. He chose a dangerous profession. He was gifted a ticking time-bomb of dangerous genes. He’d never forgive himself if he inflicted onto you the pain he’s been through; losing loved ones, whether through death or mental illness. 

Morgan's expression turned sympathetic. “Reid, you should give it a shot. Our lives our hectic. And if anyone deserves to be happy, it’s you.”

Spencer blinked to block tears from welling. “I just want her to be happy, too.”

“And who says you don't make her happy?”

“His idiotic genius brain.” Rossi appeared from around the corner.

Spencer froze. “You heard?” His face flushed yet again.

“Just the tail end. But Reid…” He trailed off.

Morgan took the hint. “I’m going to get (Y/N) some jello. With my charm, I could negotiate for some whipped cream.” 

“Don’t get whipped cream on it. She’s lactose sensitive,” Spencer said.

Morgan's stupid smirk reappeared. “Gotcha, Reid.”

Rossi took Morgan's place. Once Morgan was out of sight, he began his speech. “You love her. Don’t get in your own way.” Rossi put his hand on Reid’s shoulder. “And (Y/N) is an incredibly intelligent woman. Don’t insult her intelligence by thinking she can’t decide who is or is not worth taking a risk. And for what it’s worth…a man like you is worth the risk.” 

Rossi left Reid staring at his back. 

For the longest time, Reid convinced himself he refrained from asking you out to protect you from himself and his hefty baggage. And that’s not completely untrue. 

But suddenly, he realized he was primarily trying to protect himself from exposing his vulnerabilities to you this whole time. There’s never been a person whose opinion affected him like yours. There's never been a life he's wanted to protect more except perhaps...Maeve.

But just like it’s up to you to decide who’s worth the risk, it’s up to him to decide as well.

And if today taught him anything, shit happens. And if you slip through his fingers, he doesn't want it to because he wasn't brave enough to make a first move.

And being your person was more than worth the risk of rejection.

Author's Note: Thank you to so much to everyone who stuck around through my hiatus! I appreciate every single one of you! You're super cool :)

Happy to be back! Inbox is open to chat about writing and take requests! Please check pinned "Blurb Requests" post before requesting! (Will update the post as my boundaries update!)

Have an awesome day or night, wherever you are in this crazy world. I am incredibly thankful you spent part of your precious life reading something I penned.

Forever grateful,

shewroteaworld

[consistantscreaming]

I'm relistening to The Magnus Archives, and I made a list of Actual Canonical Details we as a fandom forget about

- sasha gets coffee from a specific coffee shop every morning

- Jon has an excellent sense of direction

- canonically in artifact storage there is: a wardrobe light cannot penetrate, a carved rock eye that interferes with the video cameras and therefore is kept in a black velvet bag, and a scalpel ride with disease no matter what they use to sterilize it, kept in a hermetically sealed plastic box

- during halloween week, they have to call in the archives as backup due to the influx of statements. jon canonically gets a good nights sleep after disproving these statements.

- Jon sincerely believes he is far too unlucky for statements to just be a hallucination

- Not-sasha asked not to be recorded multiple times

- when told he benifited from gertrude's death, jons only response was "...I didn't?"

- [daisy became police in ~2002, almost 15 years before the story starts...meaning she is canonically late thirties/early 40s

- even when compared with the paranormal, daisy considers car accidents worse

- mary keay made an eye pun "i know the institute and i haven't always seen eye to eye, as it were"

- jon noticed when ghost hunt uk stopped updating

- sasha is taller than not-sasha

- annabelle dresses like a vintage clothing store exploded on her, has bleach blonde hair and dark skin

- annabelle looked "like the type of person that talked to cleaners as if they were actual people"

- annabelle looms over the cleaner by almost a full foot, meaning she Tall

- "the moment i die will feel just the same as this one" is not just a georgie thing, it's an End thing in general, as proved in ep 70

- not-sasha tends to stay late

- martin worked at the institute in 2009

- micheal has curly sandy blonde hair

-micheal is tall

- melanie and jon are on the same wavelength, and when working together they both came to the same conclusions with the same evidence

- elias does not think daisy is smart

- georgie is observant, and pays attention to peoples behavior

- melanie thought jon killing someone with a pipe was "wildly out of character" for him

- georgie and jon have a mutual friend named Jess who thinks Hungarian food is "too Soviet"

- jon borrowed georgie's coat when he went to meet jude perry

- jon tells jude to kill him as an ultimatum every five minutes

- elias tells tim that when presented with horrors, he finds comfort in beaurocrocy

- jared hopworth is handsome with cheekbones and a jawline to die for

- georgie was canonically willing to cover for jon to the police with no context after an unpleasant breakup and after no contact for almost 5 years

- georgie grew up poor in liverpool, and had a scouse accent until she went to oxford

- basira is a huge nerd and will talk about what she's reading to anyone who will listen

- nikola makes an allusion to not having a face

- martin and melanie got along fantastically

- georgie told jon that he needs anchors

- "if something happened to you, or-or god forbid, The Admiral, I-"

- "Don't be a Stranger." georgie thinks she's funny

- michael had a childhood friend who was taken by something like michael (schizophrenic) and that's what drove him to the magnus institut-he never you over what he saw or didn't see

- Hannah is a black woman who works in the library, had a "Thing With The Milk In The Breakroom" in april 2016. Went on maternal leave to have a baby in June of 2017.

- elias enjoys scheduling

- martin zones out when he has to read a statement, and often takes little notice of his surroundings when doing so/about to do so

- martin was looking for a book called "marvelous spiritualism and the circus in tge 19th century" and a guy named tom said tim had it checked out

- danny and tim didn't talk much, but were still close

- Abigail Ellison-who tim calls abby- is a mutual friend of tim and danny's from "back home"

- tim shipped danny and abby

- out of the two of them, danny was more assertive and tim "had never been able to stand in the way of his confidence"

- tim has a big armchair, a printer, and a couch

- melanie has made everyone in the archives cry

- [basira loved wtg until it "took a weird turn in season 3" when they introduced something she thought was odd

- melanie, basira, and martin used to go out for drinks, and martin and basira were gossip buddies

- Melanie's dad had dementia relatively young, but he always remembered her. He called her "Little Moth", and her mothers life insurance helped pay for him to be put into Ivy Meadows Care Home-where he was killed by the Corruption at the hands of John Amherst before Julia and Trevor burnt it down.

- julia is in her early thirties and wears nondescript hard wearing denim

- jon thought that reading statements could be a classical addiction, but decided that even if it was he had no time to, as he put it, "experiment"

- Peter was surprised that elias killed people kimself-implying elias has people to do murders for him. what other murders did he commission

- martin and basira both noticed something wrong with melanie after the Elias Incidint when her work started to deteriorate-martin said she'd always been "quite conscientious"

- right after being told by basira that standing by with a cup of tea wasnt enough, when melanie entered the room Martin immediately offered her a cup of tea.

- Martin knocked over a stack of papers and defended himself by saying that they shouldn't have been there. the absolute madlad

- after micheal stabbed jon, jon told martin he stabbed himself with a bread knife; and martin then proceeded to A) believe him and B) not trust him with anything sharp after that

- Gerry didn't care abt what happened in the unknowing bc he's a book. jon asked if he was serious. Gerry responded that he was, in fact, dead serious.

- gerry teases jon by saying he doesn't know anything before rescinding that statement avd giving the vaguest hint possible. he's such a dickhead i love him

- gerard didn't trust gertrude-he wanted to, but she reminded him of his mother

- gerard called trevor and julia "the van helsings"

- gerry was jealous of lietner bc his mom paid so much attention to them

- mary haunted gerard for 5 years before gertrude destroyed her, and gerry cried with relief when gertrude gave him back the destroyed book

- before the unknowing, daisy was running around killing mannequins and other Strangers

- tim didn't think they would be able to stope the unknowing

- jon would rather have tim where he could see him-which is why he let tim come (guilt guilt guilt guilt GUILT GUILT GUIL GU

- basiras dad couldn't stand people who passively whined about their problems. he always said "If you don't like something, you accept it and you adapt, or you fight, and you change it. Whining doesn't help."

- Melanie was depressed before the unknowing

- jon rambles about his latest insights and melanie wants to punch him.

- martin: "it felt good, weaving my own little web." "Also, i get to burn some stuff, so that's cool"

- basira was the one to suggest that they not tell Melanie they were doing surgery

-Daisy made jon listen to the Archers. "I hate it. but it feels... good, to hate something that can't hurt me"

[doberbutts]

weird question, but is there a reason why humans with rabies don't become as mindlessly aggressive as animals with rabies? like, how come people with rabies aren't running around biting everyone?

If I'd hazard a guess, it probably cooks us before we progress that far. Additionally, it also likely has something to do with natural instinct- humans with rabies while they are still able to talk report feeling intense fear and pain while experiencing hallucinations.

Most humans actively don't want to hurt other people- I have a schizophrenic aunt and even in her worst delusions and hallucinations where she may be screaming threats, she's never actually followed through on any of them because she genuinely doesn't want to hurt anyone when she's capable of processing situations logically. Similarly, I have a friend-of-a-friend who is also severely mentally ill, and the only times he's ever hurt someone are when he gets grabbed while he's hallucinating that someone is trying to hurt him. Those he's lashed out at in this state get shoved or kicked or punched before he continues to try to get away from them (they also forgive him immediately because they are his caretakers and understand his mental state very well).

When we started using tools as a species, we also stopped reaching for "biting you" as a defensive response unless there is truly no other choice. Even in the grips of intense fear and panic and pain and delusion and hallucination and paranoia, humans are more likely to choose literally any other option than teeth unless that's their last line of defense. We probably did bite each other back when we were no different than our great ape cousins.

More or less, I'm not entirely convinced that rabies sends signals for "bite" specifically, and is more sending signals for "attack", and humans don't really reach for "bite" when attacking as a general rule unlike other animals. Humans who are restrained in their hospital beds are significantly more likely to bite their caregivers- shoving, kicking, and punching are out of the question when you're tied down. That is true regardless of if they have rabies or not.

Additionally, the virus seems to only progress so far before it stagnates at a specific stage in certain animals. Bats are significantly more likely to have "dumb rabies" than "furious rabies". This could be due to a number of things ranging from "dumb rabies makes them incapable of flight and fucks up their sonar [true!] and so they starve to death before symptoms can progress past that [theory!] since they have fast metabolisms and missing even a single night's meal is devastating to their health [true!]" to "bats show some resistance to rabies as a whole [true!] and thus it may take much longer for symptoms to progress in the usual manner and so the bat generally dies before it can go any further [theory!]" Bats CAN progress to the furious stage, but we don't tend to see it as often.

There has never been a recorded instance of rabies passing from human to human so my money's on a combo of the two theories. It's very possible that Grug The Caveman got rabies from the wolves he was trying to tame and then wiped out his entire society by zombie-biting the fuck out of everyone who tried to help him. But we weren't writing things down at that point, so we have no way of knowing.

Rabies' first documentation is 4000 years ago- but it's very possible it existed before that, since the writing just states that the owner of a rabid dog needs to take provisions against it biting anyone, meaning we knew by then what rabies was and that the bite was dangerous. It's very possible this disease has followed us around since before humans harnessed fire and invented the wheel. That's a decent amount of un-accounted-for time for humans to have hulked out and started zombie-biting.

We have so many folkstory monsters in nearly every culture on the planet that boil down to "had contact with an animal that was acting strangly, turned me into a savage monster that tries to kill everything I see less than a month later, btw my monster disease is super contagious and I spread it by biting the fuck out of you" that predate any modern science knowledge of how the virus works, which makes me think that it probably did happen back in the caveman days and it's ancestrial memory that has us clinging to these concepts to this day.

[respectthepetty]

The Sign of a Mental Disorder

Tharn has the gift of sight. Yai and the abbot believe Tharn has this gift. Yet Tharn does not share this information with others, including Phaya, because he doesn't want people to think he is crazy.

When Yai questions why Tharn didn't tell Phaya the truth, Tharn immediately thinks Yai is talking about his gift of sight, but Yai is talking about how Tharn likes Phaya. To Tharn, the truth is his gift while his love for Phaya is a fantasy.

Dr. Chalothon knows about Tharn's gift, yet 1) spins it that Tharn has a mental disorder and 2) easily offers up that information to Phaya.

Chalothon, a psychiatrist, might be a childhood friend or a doctor who "treats" Tharn for his condition. Either way, Chalothon knows the truth and uses it as a weapon against Tharn by likening Tharn's (and Phaya's) experience to those of a killer who he immediately labels as Schizophrenic.

Previously, Phaya reminded the doctor that they shouldn't discuss the case because the investigation was still ongoing, yet the doctor, who should know better, has no qualms disclosing Tharn's trauma. If Tharn is a patient, this a breach of confidentially and if Tharn is a friend, this is a breach of trust. But this is also a reminder of how discussions happen about people with mental illnesses and not believing them as victims.

Framing a supernatural show through the lens of a procedural investigation isn't new because it's an effective storytelling device that requires the logical examination of the illogical. And it's also an examination of how we dismiss people and ideas we don't understand.

Even when we should believe what is being presented to us.

Tharn does not doubt his gift. In fact, his gift is a painful reminder that he can't ignore. When he saw Phaya getting stabbed, his head hurt.

So when he was in the woods, his head hurt.

But instead of seeing the future,

he saw the past.

Which is a gift Phaya also shares.

But his family gives a logical reason for his visions.

Remember that Phaya is the one who doubted the victims' stories, so for a logical man from a logical family, it must be painful to not understand what is happening.

However, Phaya gets the same painful reminder that he cannot ignore. His head hurts. A physical manifestation of the unexplainable.

But instead of accepting what is happening, Phaya reacts, with violence.

Others have guessed that the anger comes from the thought that Tharn has betrayed his trust and the idea that Tharn doesn't believe him (but remember that during that conversation with the doctor, Tharn's trust was also betrayed). Others have also stated that seeing Phaya express his anger in this controlled environment is good.

BUT . . . We've already been told this isn't the way to deal with conflict or competition.

And this is where Chalothon thrives.

As a psychiatrist, someone who specializes in mental illnesses and how they physically and emotionally manifest, Chalothon speaks calmly and nicely, yet clearly knows how to ignite rage in Phaya.

The way Chalothon fights is not physical. It leaves no marks. He never lays a hand on Phaya to hurt him. He is mentally attacking Phaya (and even possibly supernaturally). Just like he attacked Tharn without anyone noticing. He is attacking these men in ways that others would not believe because they can't be seen.

Tharn and Phaya's job depends on them providing evidence of a crime, of a victim being harmed, and of a criminal causing harm. Yet the case they are working on has the criminals as the victims and the victims as the criminals. What is the crime then? One of justice?

Tharn wronged Chalothon in a previous life and has been told this multiple times making Chalothon the victim, yet Tharn and Phaya have become the victims of Chalothon in this life. Is this justice? Because the way Chalothon is attacking them makes them seem crazy. Nobody would believe they were victims, just like the audience hasn't truly seen Chalothon as the victim even though it has been stated as the reason Tharn and Phaya's karma is tied together.

Tharn's sight allows him to see victims.

The audience dismissed Chart as crazy. But what if he was the first victim?

Because this story of an elite investigation unit is asking us to look closer at how men can be the victims and how they are being dismissed as crazy. Yai called the suspect a psychopath. Chalothon suggested the man suffered from a mental illness. Tharn saw the man's sister die by suicide. The suspect has yet to actually kill anyone himself, so right now, this man is a victim of a failed system but was quickly labeled as crazy for his tactics toward justice.

It's a way to silence victims. Nothing they say can be trusted because they are crazy. Nothing they experience is real because they are insane. There is no crime if there is no victim. So no matter how hard these men physically fight, they can't beat the label of having a mental illness because everything they do will only prove its existence.

Their every action is a painful sign of a mental disorder.

And the psychiatrist knows that.

Which is why he chose to seek justice this way.

[leiandroid]

gaara&ino | a little outtake of a psychiatric ward au :)

ino is a "schizophrenic", she hears things which she believes are people's thoughts, and so claims she can read people's minds. she has motor ticks and a tendency for repetitive actions which is channeled through her hobby of arranging flowers. her room in the ward is filled with flower wreaths, arrangements etc, and she gets very anxious when they are out of place. she also has OCD.

gaara is a narcoleptic kid with anti social and behavioural issues. he wears a straight jacked most of the time and it only gets tied up when he exhibits signs of going into an episode (his episodes are characterised by violence and destruction and is a great threat to himself and those around him, but especially himself). his room in the ward is padded to avoid injury.

gaara often uses his narcolepsy as an excuse for getting out of trouble and avoiding certain conversations and people.

due to the heavy medications that gaara is always under, his emotions are extremely subdued and he doesn't feel any of them in any real intensity, the meds keep him emotionally invalid and numb.

ino and gaara become unlikely friends when gaara was going into an episode and some of the other patients were enabling him by feeding his anger by bullying him and throwing stuff at him. ino punched one of them in the face and dragged gaara away from them.

gaara bit her arm hard enough to draw blood but she withstood it through tears in her eyes and told him, "i won't hold that against you because i know you're scared."

when the nurses finally arrived, the worst of it had already passed but he was still given some medications to placate him. to which ino says, "he really hates those, you know?"

gaara just stares at her, puzzled. it is the first time someone has stood up for him and has voiced his thoughts that he keeps to himself.

from then on, she sticks to gaara like glue. he finds solace in her room because it smells of earth and flowers and it is very calm and quiet. ino's voice is bright and melodic and she has full conversations with him without him needing to open his mouth because ino says she can read his thoughts better than anyone else's; and he accepts this as true because more often than not she's right about what he's thinking.

because of this, ino speaks on his behalf to the nurses and doctors and other patients. gaara gets particularly moody when the doctors ignore ino's words and turn to him to ask, "is that right gaara? do you really feel [insert what ino said]?" he just angrily nods, and ino crosses her arms haughtily and reminds them that she can read his mind and "you don't have to talk to him like he doesn't understand."

they develop an unhealthy attachment that causes both of them anxiety when they are separated. ino needs to protect him and gaara needs the peace she brings him. however, gaara causes her a lot of grief when he destroys her room at times during his fits which triggers her OCD and she has to lock him out for hours or even days at a time to re-arrange her room. similarly, gaara feels exposed when she reads him too well, many times he can be heard yelling at her to get out of his head. their fights are as explosive as their friendship is easy.

gaara's once bare and empty room slowly gets filled by colourful blankets and pillows and plushies that ino buys for him. he can regularly be found sleeping under a large soft pile in the corner of his room.

ino is always excited to see temari when gaara's siblings come to visit. even though gaara isn't always thrilled or really feels like seeing them, he sits through it just so ino can get a chance to talk to temari. ino looks up to temari as a role model. and temari appreciates ino who takes care of gaara and has given him a friendship he otherwise couldn't have gotten in the outside world.

inoichi likes gaara because he sees how happy his daughter is around him, but he is wary of him due to his tendency for violence and only hopes he doesn't truly hurt ino.

[alostlittleriverlotus]

not in a good mood cause my friend's boyfriend is dealing with his abusive mom. And after a recent issue they had of her verbally abusing him, he found out about narcissistic abuse and ow. Ow. Thing is, he's autistic/adhd and has BPD and DID. I just. I fucking hate how easy it is. He repeated that "autistic and adhd people attract narcissists."

NO!!!!! Luckily he's very open minded and chill and is trying to understand when my friend tells him. But still. The fact that someone with equally demonized disorders and BPD which can be very commonly comorbid with NPD and then demonizes narcissists cause of how widely available that information is hurts. Just...no. Just no.

That is how easily accessible the information on "narcissists" is. He learned about it that easily when that ableism stems from the same place as the rest of hatred of mental health. There are people that believe you can't be in a relationship with someone with ADHD without it being emotionally abusive. People think meltdowns from autistic people are intentional emotional abuse. There are people that still believe that stuff.

It is so important for the rest of the mentally ill to not fall into this hole of demonizing narcissists. That ableism stems from the same place that ableism against autistic people and depression and anxiety and all stem from.

Narcissism doesn't make someone more likely to abuse. They do not have unique patterns of abuse. It is just abuse. It is emotional abuse, verbal abuse, mental abuse. Just because someone that may have NPD is abusive does not make it narcissistic abuse. And also: if your abuser, especially if you are genetically related to them, has NPD then that raises the chance YOU would have NPD. It doesn't guarantee it, but personality disorders are a mix of trauma and genetics.

Anyone with any disorder can be abusive. People without disorders can be abusive. The majority of abusive people most likely don't have a personality disorder. It's the same as assuming that "all serial killers are schizophrenic" which is something my brother said to me recently. It's the same as believing all criminals are "psychopaths" when that just isn't true.

Anyone with or without disorder or neurodivergency has the ability to abuse and hurt others. A lot of the time, abusers may be just neurotypical. Narcissists aren't more likely to abuse than anyone else. Their disorder does not make them abusive. Any disorder can affect their treatment of someone.

I have dealt with many people who used their depression as a way to abuse me. It does not make it depression or depressive abuse. The disorder is irrelevant, the abuse is not.

If you lump in narcissists with abusers, you are lumping in other people that have been abused and traumatized with their abusers. I have been compared to a rapist, to a child sex offender, to a serial killer for being a narcissist. I have seen people saying to kill every narcissist since it would be better for people. I have been told I am lying about my abuse and actually my abusive ex boyfriend didn't abuse me, *I* abused *HIM.*

Narcissistic abuse does not exist. It is not a different or unique pattern. It is not "different than NPD cause the word narcissist existed before NPD" (when it is heavily associated with NPD and many resources say it is about NPD.) It is not a special type of abuse done by people with NPD. It is bullshit. You don't need "narcissistic abuse" to be able to understand your own abuse. Narcissists are not everywhere and looking to harm you. It keeps you scared and traumatized. It is not healing, it is not helping.

I'm just so upset cause my friend's BF is such a cool dude and I have faith he will learn over time, but it was so triggering. I split so fucking bad. So yes. Here's my rant and the reminder that: Narcissistic abuse is bullshit and just demonizes people with NPD and the mentally ill and people they often claim are narcissists aren't and are just privileged and entitled and shitty people and often have to do with more systemic problems that are normalized and accepted by society rather than, you know, icky mentally ill person.

Oh and btw. If you're gonna fight at all on this, just block me. Either you can listen and learn or not. If you're in the "not" section, just leave. You'll just be blocked anyway. Because I'm not here to have it justified why it's okay to say narcissists are abusive when I am literally a narcissist and this shit has literally worsened me to the point of wanting to die. Fuck off. We are mentally ill people. Some people with NPD being abusive does not make us all abusive. You would never say the same for any other disorder so why say it for us? If you wouldn't say it about autism, depression, OCD, or any other literal mental illness then do NOT say it about us. There are people out there who DO still say that about those disorders. Who DO believe that a disorder makes you inherently abusive. Is that who you want to side with? Cause it's the same fucking logic. Narcissistic abuse is purely pop psychology and popularized by the mainstream rather than even being a real term. Yes, psychologists and other professionals can be wrong and can be ableist too.

I've said my piece. Narcissists and anyone else demonized whether your disorder is widely demonized or not, I love you. A lot of disorders have become more infantilized rather than demonized these days, but there are people out there that still see every mentally ill person as evil. No matter what kind of ableism you face for your disorder, you deserve love and care and support, not to be treated more like an object than a person. And no matter what, no matter how good or bad, You. Deserve. Help. You deserve to be able to have access to help without any bullshit.

[takeyourcyanide]

My personal headcanons for Stein:

(I wanted to participate in the fun)

On the autism and schizophrenic spectrum

An antisocial (as in aspd [psychopath/sociopath]), and is on the psychopathic side

Not only does he spin in his chair frequently, but he also paces back and forth, rocks back and forth, bounces his leg, etc. and did so as a child. He also listens to music to self-stimulate/stim (whatever you want to call it).

The screw is also to stim. But also for self-expression. But also for when his thought become to jumbled and incoherent, or when he can’t distract himself from his own addictions (cigarettes, dissection)/certain desires. The screw is for calming himself and his thoughts that never stop. His brain is like a fat little hamster on a wheel. The gears are constantly turning. They never stop. The screw assists in evening himself out a little bit.

Dreams often

All of said dreams tend to be odd and considerably nightmarish

Likes to decorate and expresses himself through such (you have seen his interesting living quarters)

I think he did experience some form of what might be considered as trauma as a young child, but does not consider it himself to be traumatic, which is why you see him say that nothing affected him as a child at all/is in denial

I think he logically understands that scientifically speaking, the way in which his brain functions and the reasons for his behavior have both genetic and environmental factors. The environmental factors being why his genes were “expressed” in the way they were, so to speak. But it is either not accepting of it, doesn’t remember it well (as many others have suggested), or doesn’t view it as being traumatic to him specifically.

I also believe this sort of logical side of himself that usually takes over sort of battles it out with the more deluded side of himself, leaving Stein constantly exhausted (as you see even within the series itself)

I think he hallucinates quite frequently, and just doesn’t mention it. It’s something he mostly ignores. He makes playful remarks about hallucinating and being “crazy”, but doesn’t care to go into detail.

He wanted his house/laboratory to be confusing to anyone who wasn’t him. Just for fun. And for self expression purposes. He wanted someone to walk up on his property and immediately find themselves dumbfounded. He wanted the most confusing layout possible as well.

For him, incoherency is his coherency.

The man is organized, but often in a disorganized way. Or at least, he tries very hard to be organized, but it never lasts. He is a bit scattered, and it reflects in said organization.

He has stitches, both because of the experiments and slicing and dicing he did on himself, and also for the purposes of symbolism and self expression. It symbolizes the fact that he is being held together by stitches. Ready to burst open at any moment. He is holding himself together and living within society, but barely.

He had hyperfixations throughout his life, of course, and they primarily had to do with science and death.

He was and is obsessed with everything death encompasses.

It’s just so fascinating to him.

He only really wears certain items of clothing, namely turtlenecks, button-up collared shirts, and coats. He wears the same brand of dress pants often. It’s just was he feels comfortable in.

He finds humanity endearing in some ways, and completely and utterly obnoxious in other ways. (This was kind of shown throughout the series, though)

He can never truly be himself, and this has caused him a lot of misery, including as a young child

For his entire life there’s been a resentment and envy deep down that he’s felt towards people, because at the end of the day, they have some sort of community in which they are truly accepted for who they are, and throughout his life, he has not. Even at the academy, he has experienced this, so finding the group of friends that he did, especially Marie and Spirit is something he is incredibly appreciative of.

He dissected some of his stuffed animals as a child.

Was the type to behead and just generally dismember dolls

Definitely aroace

Not someone who’s really built for relationships of any kind

That’s why it’s such a miracle he has those he does at the academy who are willing to be patient with him

Had to teach himself cognitive empathy from young age due to his never developing emotional empathy

Ended up in a facility once

Rarely tried and paid attention in class, but always had very good grades

When it came to the psychologists he was forced to see, he often didn’t speak to them at all. And when he did, he was incredibly vague, cryptic, and lied all the time.

Not a huge fan of the idea of shoving pills down people’s throats, and didn’t want that to happen to him

He views it as forcing those who aren’t deemed “normal” enough to be “just like everyone else” and to be how they want them to be

Doesn’t care about gender.

What I mean by that is, despite not having interest in romance, if he were to be in a relationship, he would not care about the gender or sex of that person.

So, you could say he’s pansexual/bisexual.

He is often reminded of the barrier that exists between him and other people, and when this happens, he finds himself feeling like the same small child who couldn’t understand anyone like they could understand one another

Feels like he missed a meeting on how to be human that everyone else attended

Or just wasn’t invited

Isn’t a huge social gathering person

Doesn’t always mind it, as long as he gets to be quiet and observe

But get overstimulated at times and leaves the room for a little while

He’s got people asking where he went

And he’s just in some random dark and quiet room

Sometimes brings noise cancelling earbuds because of this

He’s also texture sensitive

Won’t eat certain foods, wear certain clothes, touch certain things, etc.

That goes along with his certain clothing thing before

At the end of the day, he recognizes that he’ll always be an outsider of sorts.

Felt at least mildly suicidal throughout his life

I could say more, but this is already very long.

He’s so me

[brw]

Honestly even if you don't like Hank Pym (which is fair! Nobody is under any obligation to like a fictional character!), I just don't understand the insistence that he would be better and make more sense as a villain. Call me a radical, but I think taking one of the few explicitly schizophrenic / bipolar (depending on what comic you're reading) superheroes who, despite how ugly and difficult his mental issues are, is ultimately loved by his friends and family and actively makes the world a better place through his effort and love for the world is a much more powerful statement than "mentally ill people are fundamentally evil and abusive". I just think that comic books especially have no lack of mentally unstable or mentally ill villains and forcing someone established as a hero to be a villain simply because you don't like the way his mental illness is articulated has always felt like a really weird and fucked up way to real with your dislike of the character.

[sophieinwonderland]

r/systemscringe's self-proclaimed "Tumblr Lore Historian" spewing mass amounts of misinformation

Why? Why can't you coordinate alters like this?

It's pretty well-known that alters can communicate internally. Everyone with even a basic understanding of DID is aware of this.

And researchers have had alters voluntarily switch in an fMRI machine!

There is neurological proof of DID systems being able to control switches!

"I don't know if this is possible or not but I don't like you talking about your experiences with your own mental illness in a funny way."

(Is this even about DID? I don't know if it's from a good plural culture blog or an anti-endo one. I'm just going to talk about it as if it were about DID.)

Also... this is actually about a negative experience. Sure, it's presented in a lighthearted way and is intended to be humorous... but it's not a good or positive experience.

And this makes the whole thing feel ableist for far more reasons than just the normal pluralphobic ones. This seems aimed at policing people with disorders of all kinds being able to joke about their own disorders!

Because to these ableists, even joking about negative aspects of your disorder is somehow glamorizing it.

The only emotion these people think you should be able to express towards your disorders is self-loathing.

And WHY WOULDN'T THIS BE POSSIBLE?

All they're describing is one alter waking up and turning the alarm off, and someone else fronting later.

Having multiple alters who switch throughout the day is the defining characteristic of DID!

Do you know anything about DID?

Yes, yes. You're ableist and hate people with disorders making jokes about them. We established that above.

More importantly, have you opened the DSM? Because alters of gods and spirits isn't that weird!

Yes, DID systems form alters based on religions! You should know this!

What is your obsession with Hazbin Hotel?

Again, religious alters are common enough experiences that they're literally described in the DSM itself.

Yes? That sounds like what they're describing.

Why not?

We already established in the beginning that some systems can control who is fronting. This has been proven for a fact with fMRI scans.

So why wouldn't a system be able to turn things into a game to see who could do their tasks the quickest?

Maybe. Maybe it's because you're a bitter person who hates people ever enjoying themselves and being happy. 🤷‍♀️

I think if you're scrolling through and getting irrationally angry at people not being miserable, you should actually analyze why you're feeling that way before you make posts making fun of them.

(Also, the tone here isn't "funny." It's excited at actually being recognized by a friend.)

Oh? Why don't you prove it then?

Like you said, you're not a professional!

So cite one! If you think alters can't form that easily, back that opinion up with someone who actually does know what they're talking about!

"I'm just someone who knows..."

No. You don't! You haven't studied this. You aren't relying on information from anyone who actually has. You're confidently shouting your uneducated and wrong opinions about a disorder you've demonstrated time and time again that you know NOTHING about, based entirely on what you've heard from other equally uneducated people on the internet!

I think we can tell the difference between a fictional character we have control over, and something that is completely autonomous, regularly interacts with us directly, and has autobiographical memories of those interactions.

Also, while there are many disorders that can cause voice hearing and seeing a doctor is a good idea if you can, it's worth noting that voice hearing in children is more associated with DID than psychotic disorders.

90% of DID systems start hearing their alters before the age of 18, compared to 28% of schizophrenic people with maltreatment and 38% with maltreatment.

But of course, having people in your head also isn't a disorder, and if you think you have a sentient voice in your head that isn't yours, you can check out my test to find out:

Notably, your average writing character should NOT be able to pass this test.

[doumadono]

So this is sort of an emergency comfort request if I'm reading the thing right

So I'm a schizophrenic by diagnosis and recently and would like an emergency comfort for Hitoshi Shinsou comforting his agender partner ( please they them pronouns) after they have a bad dissociation fit + paranoia attack

So essentially what happed was I found out a friend was talking about me online. I had to go to them. A potential friendship was ruined with someone they were friends with. It set me into a fit of " who can I trust. Do I ha e real friends? Is everyone out to get me?? If they're talking about me I'm never going to get new friends. " and I just generally got very very uneasy and paranoid about how many people are currently talking about me. If I can trust people. Then I started to dissociate in my chair, couldn't get up to take my mental health meds nor could I even speak/sing ( a major coping skill for me ) for a solid hour.

So if you could write a drabble or a fic where Shinsou calms the reader down during an attack like mine I'd so kindly appreciate it. Bonus points if they've been together for a long time and he reassures them time and time again he won't live just because people and they themselves think they're a "monster".

A/N: hiya, my dear. I'm truly sorry to hear that you went through such a difficult and distressing experience. It's completely understandable to feel shaken and paranoid in the aftermath of discovering your friend's actions. Remember that you are not alone, and there are people who care about you, including me. Take your time to heal, and please don't hesitate to reach out if you need someone to talk to or just a listening ear. You are strong, and you will find your way through this challenging time, I'm sure about that ♥

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST

Hitoshi Shinsou had known their struggles well. The two of them had been together for years, and while life had its ups and downs, their love had remained unwavering. He understood the intricacies of their condition, the unpredictable nature of dissociation and paranoia attacks. So, when the shadows of despair crept in, he was always there to shine a guiding light.

On a particularly tough evening, they found themselves lost in the labyrinth of their own mind, grappling with disorienting dissociation and suffocating paranoia. Shinsou was immediately at their side, his touch gentle as he guided them to the safety of their shared apartment.

Shinsou watched them with a mixture of concern and determination in his eyes. He knew that this was a battle they fought many times before, but each time was its own unique struggle. He saw the turmoil in their gaze, the desperation, and the desire to break free from the prison of their own mind.

The attack had begun like a quiet whisper, a subtle shift in their perception that grew louder and more chaotic with each passing moment. As they sat on the couch, the world around them seemed to blur and distort. The room that was once familiar now felt like a maze of shadows and uncertainties.

Dissociation was a cruel trickster. It stole away their connection to reality, leaving them adrift in a sea of disjointed thoughts and fragmented sensations. They felt detached from their own body, as though they were a mere observer in a world that was no longer theirs.

Paranoia crept in, like tendrils of darkness winding around their mind. Every sound, every shadow, and every thought seemed to conspire against them. Whispers of doubt became roaring cacophonies, and they couldn't escape the feeling that they were being watched, judged, and condemned.

Their heart raced, its beats like the drums of an impending storm. Their breath quickened, and the walls seemed to close in around them. It was as though the world had become a twisted funhouse, where mirrors distorted their reflection into monstrous shapes, and every corner concealed lurking threats. "I can't, I can't…" They were whispering, on and on.

They sat together with Shinsou on the couch, his partner's heart racing, and their thoughts spiraling. Shinsou, calm and unwavering, cupped their face in his hands, ensuring they made eye contact with him. "Hey, it's me," he said softly, his violet eyes locking onto theirs. "I'm right here with you, and I'm not going anywhere. You're not a monster, and you're not alone in this."

Their breaths trembled, but they held onto his presence like an anchor. "I just… I can't stop these thoughts. They're like a storm, tearing me apart." Their hands trembled, clutching onto the fabric of their clothes as if it were their only anchor to reality. "I'm nothing but a freaking monster. People see me as one, as well..."

Shinsou could see the silent plea in their eyes, a plea for help, for reassurance, for someone to guide them back to sanity. He leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to their forehead. "I know, love. I know it feels overwhelming, but you're stronger than you think. You've fought through this before, and you'll do it again, and I'll be right here by your side every step of the way."

With a tenderness that only he possessed, Shinsou wrapped his arms around them, pulling them close. He felt the tension in their body slowly ease as he continued to speak soothingly, "You're not a monster, not to me, not to anyone who truly knows you. These moments don't define you, they're just a part of you, and I love all of you, every single part." With great care, he reached out, taking their hands in his, grounding them with his touch. "You're safe," he repeated, his voice unwavering.

His words were a lifeline, and you clung to them as if your life depended on it. Shinsou's voice was a melody of reassurance, drowning out the dissonance in your mind. "Remember, you have the power to break through this darkness. We'll do it together, just like we always have."

As minutes turned to hours, Shinsou remained by their side, patiently guiding them through the storm of their thoughts. He shared stories of the happier moments they'd experienced together, reminding them of the strength within them, and the love that surrounded them.

With time, the panic receded, and the dissociation loosened its grip. The sharp edges of paranoia softened, and the disorienting fog of dissociation started to lift. The attack raged on, but Shinsou remained steadfast, unwavering in his support. He whispered calming words and loving affirmations, reminding them that they were not alone, that they were not a monster, and that he loved them for everything they were.

Shinsou held them close, pressing another loving kiss to their forehead. "I'm proud of you, every single day," he whispered, as they lay in his comforting embrace. "You're never alone in this battle, and you'll always have me to hold you, even in your darkest moments."

In that moment, they knew that no matter how stormy the sea of their mind became, Shinsou would be their lighthouse, guiding them safely back to the shores of serenity and love.

[cannibal-nightmares]

i love my dog, i have always had dogs, i don't know if i'd be alive without my current dog. but if we're confessing things here, he is such a paranoia trigger for me. i love that i am the one who has the honor to care for him, that i adopted him before someone else did, and i could never imagine him handing him over to someone else..but so much in having a dog of my own does things to my paranoia annd provokes a specific degree of agitation that I will probably never be able to shake. and i'm not talking "ahh im worried he'll get sick" or "i dont like his barking" type-paranoia and agitation, i'm speaking of fantastical fears that I'm not about to spread around in describing. or at least not right now in a post so informal. someone (very considerately) asked if I would ever get a service dog and i didn't know how to answer because of all of this.

anyways, this is all to say that i know my friends have observed my genuine parental love for my dog, but at the same time, this is how covert schizophrenic delusion can be. you'd have no idea how much of a minefield everything has the potential of being.

[creepypasta-cb]

꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷Information꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷

🔪 Name: Timothy Wright 🔪 Better known as "Masky"

🔪 Pronouns: he/him

🔪 Age: 23

🔪 Height: 5'6

🔪 Species: human

🔪 Eye colour: deep brown

🔪 Hair: black

🔪 Other features: always wearing a white mask and never takes it off. Proxy tattoo on his left wrist

🔪 Occupation: Former mental patient 🔪 Now a stalker and killer

🔪 Disorders: multiple personality disorder, schizophrenic

꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷Background꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷

🔪 Timothy was stalked by the operator for years. It could be as late as his childhood years.

🔪 He would have these "blackouts". During these blackouts he would be out killing people as Masky. Tim would have no recollection when he was Masky.

🔪 Him killing people would go on for months before the Operator intervened. Someone Tim knew, Alex, would tell Tim about what he all did during the blackouts. He told Tim about all the murders and his intentions.

🔪 Tim, not Masky, but Tim ends up killing Alex and goes insane. He gets sent to a mental hospital and there he's diagnosed with MPD.

🔪 He ends up killing the nurses who were helping him and escapes. He escaped into the woods and found his lost friend who now goes by Hoodie. Together they get recruited by Slenderman and does the dirty work for him.

🔪 Now due to his MPD, Masky mainly fronts and Tim barely comes around anymore.

꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷Personality꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷

🔪 Traits: calm, inwardly distressed, secretly wants to be normal, cold, germaphobe, sensitive

🔪 Likes: cleaning, cheese cake, secretly likes his face being touched, good hygiene, smoking

🔪 Dislikes: germs, dirt, bad smells, randomly being touched, messes

🔪 Other notes: Masky can talk, but he chooses to not talk unless he has to. He is very strict and uptight about things and is constantly cleaning.

꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷NSFW꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦

🔪 Position: tries to act like a top but really is an obedient sub

🔪 Does get really huffy when bottoming

🔪 Kinks: knives, blood, masochist, spanking (recieving), oral (giving after they take a shower), gun play (🤫), somnophilia (receiving), groaping (receiving), public, grinding, humilation, bondage (giving and receiving), blindfold (giving and receiving), recording, gagging (recieving), choking (giving and recieving), torture

꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷Relationships꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷

🔪 Ideal type: someone who had good hygiene and does a lot of self care. They need to overal be really clean and not cause any messes. He does not care about looks or personality. He can tolerate most people.

🔪 Sexuality: Bi curious

🔪 Dating: Single

🔪 Friends: Hoodie, Ticci Toby

[drowninginredink]

Okay, you know what? Hot take time. Because let me tell you, I have Feelings about The Chosen as a character. Do I love him? Of course. Am I very excited for the fact that we're almost due for another Chosen Multiverse video? Yes. But. I also think that the reason we all find him funny is, dare I say, problematic. Please don't click away. I swear I have a point.

I know where Shayne got the character from. And yes. We all knew that kid. For me, I spent about half a year being sworn enemies with that kid, until I decided "you know what? Actually I'm going to be his friend." Being his friend was great until he moved away like a year later.

But the thing with The Chosen is that ultimately the reason we find him funny is that he's fundamentally disconnected from the real world. He does not live in the same reality as us. He thinks he has a higher purpose, but really he's just some loser. And as someone on the schizophrenia spectrum, that doesn't sit right with me. In the real world, when a grown man thinks he was "chosen" for a special purpose to save the world, he's a schizophrenic. It may be very unintentional, but if the chosen were real and older than 12, that's what he'd be. Being disconnected with reality is called being delusional. People deal with that all the time. I just got to catch myself in one earlier today. It's not just something for comedy characters.

I'm aware this isn't a thing that was done on purpose. These things are never done consciously. Anti-psychotic bias and the notion of psychotic people as inherently ridiculous is deeply rooted in our culture. It is so much bigger than Shayne Topp not having all of the Aunt Carolyn costume one day and making a joke out of how cringe he used to be.

Again. I like The Chosen. A lot. I want a three wolf moon shirt. I am not telling anyone to stop enjoying that content. I just want people to be aware of where the comedy comes from. I want to talk about it. I want to stop feeling like I'm the only one who sees this. I want other people to be slightly conflicted about it right along with me.

Oh, and I want to write a fic where The Chosen is actually psychotic. That too. I'm definitely doing that.

Oh, and while we're here? If you have ever read any of my fics and liked it, here's how you can show your appreciation. Stop using the terms "delusional," "psychotic," and "paranoid" unless you are describing people with actual mental illnesses experiencing symptoms of those disorders. Stop making jokes about hearing voices or hallucinating. Stop saying delulu. Most importantly, if you ever know or see anyone having any kind of mental health crisis, for the love of God, do not call 911. Ever. I do not care what they are doing. When psychotic people encounter the cops, it does not end well. There are local helplines and services that you can research... But even if you can't find one, doing nothing is still better than calling 911.

Okay. Serious moment over. Back to your regularly scheduled obsessing over comedians.

[tainted-liquor]

hi guys! Just wanted to make a quick follow up abt mental health, specifically schizophrenia

alright so, as you know people are trying to excuse their actions with mental illnesses as of late and say they are “experiencing episodes”.

let me remind you, someone with UNDIAGNOSED and UNMEDICATED schizophrenia will usually not know if they’re having the episode. Because if they KNEW, they’d most likely stop it themselves or refrain from doing anything that would hurt others. By acknowledging you are having an episode, you are consciously acknowledging that you don’t NORMALLY behave this way. The excuse of ‘suddenly having an episode’ does not work, because schizophrenia alters your way of thinking/behaving. You wouldn’t KNOW, because you’d think what you were saying was true/normal.

I’m gonna use an example.

Ok, let’s say sally is schizophrenic. Because she is diagnosed with this condition, she knows she will have moments where she will believe things that might not be true or think some things that aren’t necessarily positive. Sally does a good job at taking her meds, grounding herself, and buckling down when she feels as though she might slip into an episode. Sally seeks out a therapist, or if she can’t afford one, a trusted loved one to talk to whenever she doesn’t feel her best.

Sally is mature and knows how to properly manage herself.

now let’s take a look at Ruby.

Ruby has ‘undiagnosed’ schizophrenia and isn’t taking meds, or even considering talking to loved ones. Whenever she has an episode, she coincidentally doesn’t behave any differently or think any differently. Episodes can last for days, weeks, and VERY RARELY months. For someone to slip in and out of an episode in under 3 minutes is nearly unheard of. Now, let’s take a look at one of Ruby’s ‘episodes’.

Ruby was caught lying on two of her friends because she wanted to see some sort of situation spark. When confronted about the matter, she says she’s having an episode. If Ruby is having a real episode, the most logical thing to do is apologize for your behavior and ground yourself. Whether this be talking it out with a loved one, writing in a diary, or seeking actual help from a licensed therapist for her undiagnosed schizophrenia.

schizophrenia DOES NOT work like Ruby! Ruby is painting a false and very harmful narrative for schizophrenia, and is damaging the people who do have schizophrenia by making it harder to get diagnosed, and spreading false info. PLEASE, if you feel like you have some sort of mental health condition, try to get diagnosed before running around with the tag. I know therapy is expensive, but there are always services that provide free therapy for minors. DO YOUR RESEARCH! Don’t ask people online, because they cannot help you.