#linguistics is cool and wild

[not-poignant]

oh god im having a moment. this may seem obvious but…i know that utr is set in australia…theres more than a few references….to australia.. and ….australian things..but i only now realised that means everyone has an australian accent omg 😭😭😭😭(me to my brain: “why didnt you tell me” my brain back: “girl are you forreal”) idk why this is so surprising to me…im slow. so all the conversations that happened…. happened with an aussie accent….temsen…gary….gwyn 😭 i know faber has more of a british accent right? idk why i remembered that but then didn’t think about calebs accent… this is amazing, its also embarrassing for me but i am protected by the veil of online anonymity so im just rolling on my couch going through past conversations in the stories re-imagining them. wait that means YOU also have an australian accent!! i LOVE australian accent!!!! almost as much as kiwi but then again i hear that one even less than aussie accents… 😂 oke have a good sunday..or wait what time is it over there?! have a good time from 9pm germany 🇩🇪 cheers mate

Ahaha, this was so great to get

Okay so firstly, I think it's fairly universal that most of us don't think of ourselves as having accents, so unless a character has a very distinct accent, I don't think of their accents at all. For that reason, I also have zero problems when people just imagine the accent that is normal to them!

Secondly, what most people know as the Australian accent is very particular to certain parts of Australia. Most people haven't heard a Perth accent, which is a lot milder overall than say, a Queensland accent. And class really influences how people talk. Like, most of these people aren't saying 'mate' for a reason, it's just not part of their daily language. So...in that sense, it wouldn't be accurate to imagine a standard television Australian accent either. It's kind of jokey, in the same way that people put on really overdone German or Russian accents, you know it's not always reflective of reality.

I love Kiwi accents too btw, so good. :D Early Flight of the Conchords forever!

But, yes, they are in Australia and they do have...Australian accents. Kadek's probably one of the most 'ocker', Faber is one of the fanciest speakers (as is Flitmouse, though he picked up his accent out of choice lol), though Gary's up there too because he came from a very educated and relatively upper class family (as is Efnisien, when he can stop swearing for five seconds!)

Characters who have a more standard Australian accent would be Janusz, Caleb, Nate, Kadek and I would say Anton's about in the middle.

But, again, if it's just easier and more comfortable to imagine whatever your internal 'generic accent' is - imagine that! For me that's actually like... a neutral English accent, for I think most people it's American! I don't even think my neutral accent is Australian, lmao, because I'm influenced by coming from a family of immigrants (Dutch + English + Russian) and watching a lot of TV growing up of which the majority wasn't Australian, and of course thinking of my own accent as just 'neutral' which it absolutely isn't.

Accents are weird!

[scribefindegil]

As much as I adore conlangs, I really like how the Imperial Radch books handle language. The book is entirely in English but you're constantly aware that you're reading a "translation," both of the Radchaai language Breq speaks as default, and also the various other languages she encounters. We don't hear the words but we hear her fretting about terms of address (the beloathed gendering on Nilt) and concepts that do or don't translate (Awn switching out of Radchaai when she needs a language where "citizen," "civilized," and "Radchaai person" aren't all the same word) and noting people's registers and accents. The snatches of lyrics we hear don't scan or rhyme--even, and this is what sells it to me, the real-world songs with English lyrics, which get the same "literal translation" style as everything else--because we aren't hearing the actual words, we're hearing Breq's understanding of what they mean. I think it's a cool way to acknowledge linguistic complexity and some of the difficulties of multilingual/multicultural communication, which of course becomes a larger theme when we get to the plot with the Presgar Translators.

[goodcastlegazette]

Wizard magic is like music……art and science and math and magic in one beautiful song….

appreciation for the deep love of the arcane in this world

[official-linguistics-post]

MR. LINGUISTICS I NEED HELP

I have a Problem™. So to make a long story short, I need to find the etymology of the word beam, with 'reputable sources'. Here's the context: I have to do a ToK presentation (theory of knowledge, it's this weird philosophy-esque required subject for my school) and I listed one of my objects (one of the three things I need to write about) as the etymology of the word beam, specifically how it evolved into like the whole laser beam thing. Now I can't find sources, and the only okay seeming one I found (oed) was paywalled......... and my school doesn't have a subscription to jstor or anything like that

If you know anything that could help me I'd be so grateful, so yeah. It's also cool if you don't know though 😭

Thanks in advance!!

FUCKIN THEORY OF KNOWLEDGE, my sympies. that class was wild.

have you tried etymonline? it doesn't really link out to other sources, but it might be a starting point for search terms, and it's definitely not paywalled. they also have a full list of their own sources under "links" in the menu at the bottom of the page, although iirc they don't necessarily cite them within entries.

[atthebell]

Do you have any vod recommendations to rewarch until our streamer comes back?

chants of sennaar - incredible game about translation and languages, very fun to watch him play since it's something he's pretty interested in, very cool if you're into linguistics like i am

tchia - cool game, interesting story and mechanics, nice long vod and someone in chat was from new caledonia so gave some cool context

stray - catboy moments of all time, beautiful game obvi

scorn - batshit gorgeous very gross (/pos) very horny game he acts like a freak the entire time it's great

mirror layers - wild ass game he once again acts like a freak the whole time fun and interesting concept and he gets scared a lot so 👍🏻

the tartarus key - fun game, interesting puzzles

scp secret files - solid game, if you're into scp stuff my impression is it's by far the best scp game to have come out

escape from mystwood mansion - cute short puzzle game very fun

decarnation - INCREDIBLE game, nails the topics it covers, cool to watch him play it since he really appreciated the style & understood the themes

viewfinder - very cool concept, fun puzzles, chill vibes

amnesia the bunker - i watched most of this live but remember nothing, fun to watch him scream and it's a nice looking game

birth - chill vibes, short and sweet

among us monastery - deranged game, he acts like a freak, very funny

the past within - any puzzle game him and felps play together is a fun watch, this one's a rusty lake game so it's got a weird fun style

underground blossom - another rusty lake game, fun puzzles, he's deranged in this for reasons you'll understand once you watch it

venba - incredible game about an indian family in canada & their relationships with each other through the lens of food, very cute very cool, tbh might go play it myself it's very much my kind of game

fear the spotlight - origins of many lesbian protector/shipper moments, and a nice little high school horror game

cellboier cryptic killer [cellbit] [roier] - i recommend watching these synced up tbh bc otherwise you will not know what the other person is fucking talking about but yeah its a cellboier stream its great watch it if you haven't already rewatch it if you feel like it

homebody - idr anything about this vod but i remember enjoying it, some horror shit in a house, he probably screams a lot and maybe there's puzzles either way a solid time

killer frequency - very fun game, cool vibes, it's been a while since i watched it but he's probably a freak in it

in no particular order

[monk-of-figaro]

Indirect Storytelling

@tayasigerson's recent (and amazing!) art of Sabin and Gau with Tiger Masks got me thinking about ways in which games can offer means of indirect storytelling that standard literature cannot.

I'm no expert on linguistics or the English language, so maybe "indirect storytelling" isn't the proper term. Or maybe I'm wrong about my assertion in the first place. But to me, the fact that only Sabin and Gau can equip the Tiger Mask feels like there's a character trait that is implied but never stated.

Why is it that only Sabin and Gau can equip the Tiger Mask? What is the commonality between the two that nobody else shares? What does this imply about their characters?

I have my own theories, of course - thoughts about how they both embody the idea of "wildness", both literally and figuratively; or maybe how they each have a connection to "nature" that is stronger than other party members; or maybe even their connection to each other has something to do with it - but the fact that something as simple as who can equip an item can be used to hint at character or plot elements is pretty wild, isn't it?

The Tiger Mask isn't even the only example of this in FF6. Probably the most famous example is the Memento Ring, which can only be equipped by Shadow and Relm, and to my immediate recollection is the only direct connection they share in-game. Everything else about their relationship is implied through Shadow's flashbacks (which only connect them by showing he was in Thamasa with a dog at some point in the past) and through Interceptor's uncharacteristic affection for Relm.

Because Shadow and Relm are not shown to have any real relation or connection, and in fact speak probably less than a dozen words to each other the entire game, the fact that this seemingly-random pair are the only ones who can equip the Memento Ring is really special (and easily missable). If everyone could equip the Memento Ring, it would lose its specialness, and we'd lose a key aspect of the Shadow/Relm backstory.

The Memento Ring also adds additional context by its description:

Ring blessed by departed mother's love. Prevents petrification, zombie, and instant death.

Most Relics in FF6 don't have as much lore behind them as something imbued with a "departed mother's love", so the fact that only Shadow and Relm can equip this strongly implies they each have a connection to this "departed mother". There are even fanfics (like this amazing one from @azurefishnets - A Nameless Memento) that use the Memento Ring directly as a plot element for the Shadow/Relm/Strago dynamic.

A third implication can be drawn from the fact that the Memento Ring prevents all instant-death techniques. Why is that? How and why does a departed mother's love protect against instant-death? What does that imply about the mother's own death?

In addition to the Memento Ring and the Tiger Mask, there are other items that can only be equipped by specific people. Here are a few choice examples:

Royal Crown (Edgar, Sabin)

Red Jacket (Edgar, Sabin)

Snow Scarf (Gau, Mog, Umaro)

All the "Suit" costumes, like the Moogle Suit (Strago, Relm)

Some of those make some sense - like the Royal Crown - but others are kind of open to interpretation. Maybe it makes sense that Mog and Umaro can equip the Snow Scarf, but why can Gau, and why can't anyone else?

What about the Red Jacket? Does that have some connection to royalty, or is there something else being hinted at? After all, red is not one of the Figaroan colors; it's the opposite of blue, which actually is one of the Figaroan colors. And why does it negate fire damage? Is there some connection with the desert heat?

Anyway, sorry for the rambling post. It just struck me how cool it is that gaming - and particularly FF6 - has this unique method of conveying story that is not possible with any other medium, and that's pretty cool! FF6 is also the only game that I can recall that uses equipment to convey (or imply) untold elements of the story like this.

As if I needed yet another reason to obsessively love the game so much.

[hermionewrites]

Freudian Slip

summary: a slip of the tongue leads to a meet cute. warnings: none. genre: fluff. a/n: if you saw this before, no you didn’t. i had to delete my account and make a new one. word count: 667

“Do you know where I could find the linguistics lecture halls?” The brunette asked the front desk with a small and slightly awkward smile as the woman sat with pinched brows glared at her for her intrusion. “I’m the new linguistics professor.” She explained but was met with another cool glare.

“Go through the double doors, take three lefts and a right then through those double doors there should be a big sign that says linguistics on it.” She says boredly and the slow clacking of her laptop keys starts up again.

“Thanks.” She drawled out with pursed lips and began to follow the instructions that the receptionist had given her, all while following the yellow arrows on the walls and above the doors. The arrows were painted on the walls above the doorways leading the way to there she was meant to be. Her pace picked up we she tried to get where she needed to be her gaze lowering to her feet taking her third left when suddenly she smacked into someone coming the opposite direction.

“I’m so sorry!” The words quickly stumbled out of her mouth as she grabbed onto the upper arms of the man she had just banged into face first trying to steady herself. In the commotion her glasses has been knocked off of her face and onto the floor. “Here.” The stranger said and handed them to her and she put them back onto her face. Oh, he was handsome, and strong according to the grip she had managed to get on his biceps just moments before. “And you’re forgiven, it was my fault really, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” He quickly rushed out and she took a step back getting a full look at the much taller man in front of her. He was wearing a suit, in a deep brown-green colour, the blazer with sewn in elbow patches, his hair wild around his face.

“No it was my fault, I don’t know where I’m going.” She countered with a small laugh and smoothed out her skirt awkwardly. “Where are you headed?” He asked. “The linguistics department, I’m a bit lost.” Looking over his shoulder at the door signs. “Could you show me how to get there?” Rocking on the balls of her feet she awaits his answer.

“Sure!” The mystery man says and walks quickly through the hallways, opening the doors for her on the way there and her giving thanks every time. The two walked in a comfortable silence as she tried to keep up with his exceptionally long legs. Then there they were as the receptionist had mentioned, the double doors with linguistics written above it.

“Thank you so much.” She expressed her gratitude and he turned on his heel and began to walk back the way they came. “Wait!” She shouted after him and walked back towards him. “I didn’t get your name.”

“Dr Spencer Reid.” He replied, “You?” He asked simply. “Dr Y/N Reid.” She felt her face heat up immediately after the mistake. “Reyes! Y/N Reyes.” She corrects and brings her hands up to cover her incredibly flushed face, the dread filling her body. The noise hit her ears next, his laugh. “Don’t look at me!” She said embarrassed and began to walk away quickly hiding her face as he kept laughing at her slip of the tongue and she scrunched her face up. “Stop looking at me!” She laughs.

“Call me.” He shouts down the hallway and registers her confused face. “Your pocket.” He explains and watches her hands dart down to her pocket and pull out a small white card with his name and number on. “Magic.” He says with a wave of his hand in front of his face before she can inquire. “Magicians are skeeves, you know!” She shouted before pushing the lecture hall doors open and letting them swing close before he could reply.

hope you enjoyed! please like <3

[silverika326]

[ Some Snippets of O.R.C.A. Dialogue That I Found Interesting ]

I was replaying Splatoon 3’s Hero Mode when I realized a lot of ppl are sleeping on this computer! So I thought I’d share some finds. This only pertains to the stuff O.R.C.A. says about the missions before you start them.

This is a long-ish post, so prepare accordingly.

We are already starting strong with a fun quip, along with the fact that O.R.C.A. is deeming the act of throwing Little Buddy around as fun.

Unsure if O.R.C.A. is attempting to sell out this mission, or is being genuine, but the idea of being called extremely cool is endearing nonetheless.

Another instance of O.R.C.A. potentially calling you cool.

I’m just pleasantly surprised that O.R.C.A. can use the word “literally” for emphasis like this. Also if O.R.C.A. is the one that names the missions, than this one is god-tier.

Another instance of O.R.C.A. accentuating a word for emphasis, capitalizing it this time. Just thought it was peculiar.

A good amount of the missions in Alterna are designed to test, manage, or demonstrate various skills and aspects of life. But being asked to manage paranoia was a bit surprising when I first entered this kettle.

Another example of being asked to manage something wild, unwanted popularity. Also this mission name is so fucking funny-

O.R.C.A. using the word “pummeling” like it’s the most normal thing in the world is also hilarious. Yes, condone beating ppl w/ hammers. /j

This is a compilation of instances where O.R.C.A. kinda uses a phrase before giving advice (I don’t know the exact linguistic term for this). What’s interesting here is the variety of phrases used here. O.R.C.A. could’ve easily sticked to one, but didn’t!

TL;DR, Callie was definitely onto something when she caught on to O.R.C.A.’s dead-pan humor. I also spent way too much time on this.

[machinesonix]

Okay so chewing my way through Dune for the first time as an adult and there’s this chapter that’s got me wilding out so hard I’m basically just gonna paraphrase it here. Obviously concessions need to be made when switching mediums and I think the films have done a splendid job, but I think they sorta took the teeth out of this one.

When the Atredies first touch down on Dune, Lady Jessica is introduced to their groundskeeper, an elderly Fremen woman called ‘the Shadout Mapes.’ Now Mapes is extremely excited to meet a member of the Bene Gesserit, from which Jessica correctly concludes the ministoria protectiva has been here seeding the local mythology with favorable propaganda. Like a good third of the new movie is screaming about how fucked up all that is, so I will curb my enthusiasm to explain what the funny words mean in exhaustive detail, but suffice to say the Space Mom Cult secretly shapes cultures all across the universe to recognize them as cool people that everybody ought to listen to when they show up. So Jessica immediately code switches into Ominous Witch Mode and shows off some of her preternatural powers of observation by calling out the Shadout Mapes for having a weapon on her. In the movie the knife is a gift. The book has a little more nuance that has me absolutely salivating.

Mapes flips out and shows her the knife, which later we’re gonna learn is made from a worm tooth. She explains that Jessica might be the One, and if she is, the knife belongs to her. If she isn’t then she’s gonna kill Jessica with it because now she already knows too much. And to put her to the test she asks her what the knife is. Jessica hopes to establish her credibility by being well versed in ancient tongues, and intends to call it the ‘maker of death’ because in the language that the word ‘Shadout’ is derived from that’s the idiomatic translation of ‘knife.’

Instead Mapes starts screaming in religious fervor as soon as she hears the word ‘Maker.’ Because the worms make the spice, see. Jessica absolutely triples down on this, and this is what drives me wild. Immediately after narrowly escaping murder by a lucky stroke of linguistics she’s like FUCK YOU, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE NOT THINKING I WOULD RECOGNIZE THE MAKER. IN FACT, I’M GONNA STAB YOU NOW. Like okay, what she actually does is go ‘Mapes, now that the blade’s been drawn who’s blood is it gonna taste?’ And here I just have to say hats off to the Bene Gesserit for their training in genre awareness. Jessica has absolutely no idea of any of the customs surrounding a crysknife and risks blowing her cover here to flex even harder. She’s right, of course, and lets the Shadout Mapes off with just a scratch. It turns out Fremen have hypercoagulant blood which is not terribly important but still kinda cool.

So to put a bow on all of this, the Shadout Mapes ends up saying something along the lines of ‘She is the One, she will free us.’ This shocks Jessica. She recognizes this line from the ministoria protectiva, and knows that only the super fucked up horrible places wind up with the ‘we will save you from your oppressors’ prophecies. And I just love it because here we've got a microcosm of what this is all about. The ministoria protectiva did exactly what it was supposed to do and saved a Bene Gesserit life because Mapes heard her own religion in what's basically a cold read con. This exploitative power is so intense that Mapes is willing to give Jessica her life; there's no reason for a Fremen to expect somebody is going to show mercy with a crysknife. And then when she's feeling at her highest and mightiest she gets a wake up call. These people have context.

The Fremen don't have their finger on the pulse of galactic politics. They know there is a limited amount of moisture in their atmosphere and that the off-worlders in the palaces are going to take enough of it to keep themselves comfortable. As far as they're concerned, the Atredies are basically Harkonnens with better personal hygiene. The freedom the Shadout Mapes is talking about is freedom from Jessica's family. The ministoria protectiva doesn't exist in a vacuum. The Fremen's history of oppression has become inseparable from what was meant to be a means to control them.

[tanoraqui]

hey!! i love your blog so much your takes are *chefs kiss*

i saw an Amazing post a few months ago where someone laid out a really cool plan for a silmarillion tv show and i cant find it again. it haunts my every waking moment. i think i saw it on your blog so i figured id ask if you knew it.

Either way, have a great day!

(note: I got this ask several thousand years ago, and am answering it now because I asked my roommates if I should write something serious tonight, or something ridiculous, or read a book; and they said ridiculous.) (note 2: I wrote the above several days ago. I'm posting at 6.5k words) (note 3: I'm going to pretend this is a deliberately timed gift to @thelordofgifs for their latest fic updates, which were bullet points of heartfelt and sober compelling canon divergence. this...is bullet points of [heartfelt? compelling?] lunacy. I hope you might enjoy it.)

Are you thinking of this, the "Supernatural but make it Silmarillion lore, and also women" show of my dreams? (Me, approaching the Tolkien estate with an offer for the rights to the Silmarillion: I swear, I will ONLY show the First Age in limited flashbacks. Everything else will be the characters as they are at least 10,000 years later, maybe even with an active framing device to identify them as modern interpretations of the characters...")

Oh huh, I forgot I thought a bunch more about that "teeechnically-not-AU" and never added it to that post. Regardless of whether it's the show you were thinking of, dear Anon:

one of the protagonists is definitely the reincarnation of Fëanor. Her name is Seraphina, which translates to something like "fiery divine being", bc her mom had a good sense of these things. They don't know this at first

her slightly older twin sister is Martha, named after their grandmother but it does mean the feminine of "master", because I spent at least an hour trying to translate any name Turin ever had into something reasonably modern and this is the best I could do (they also don't know about this reincarnation at first, ofc)

their father was killed by some sort of monster when they were babies so their mother took up monster-hunting ranging, etc. etc.

(the underground community of modern monster-hunters are called Rangers, in reference to the roaming heroes of old)

Seraphina, the Wild One(TM), ran away to go to college, where she double-majored in astrophysics and mechanical engineering and double-minored in linguistics and metallurgical engineering, and wrote an art history thesis. Martha, the Dutiful One(TM), stayed with their mother and kept ranging. They reunite when Martha shows up on Phina's doorstep because "Mom went on a hunting trip and hasn't been home in a few days", etc. etc.

the Bobby-style substitute parent should really, to (kind of) round this out, be a dwarf or hobbit. The full "Team Free Will" should represent all peoples of Arda... But I'm not making up OCs right now (yet)

a unifying legend of the Ranger community is that their unofficial network has been supported and guided for millennia by their cousins, the peredhel, Elrohir and Elladan, who quite simply never Chose and have been wandering the earth, saving people and hunting things, ever since their sister died. They don't NEED to Choose until they die, technically!

This is, in fact, true - or, it was. Until about 25 years ago, when [flips a coin] Elrohir married our heroes' mother, settled down into peaceful domesticity, and a few years later died dramatically to buy [throws a dart at a wheel of names] Laura and their children time to escape the whatever.

Laura knew about his profession and that he was older than he looked, but not his whole deal. She found that out later while vengefully hunting monsters...and never told her daughters.

The plot of Season 1 involves unravelling this mystery, including at some point meeting their elusive uncle Elladan (who has maybe gone a little mad with the sudden death of his twin? That'd be a fun season antagonist/arc/theme...dealing with grief...very topical!)

By the end of s1, all of the above have probably had a nice closure-giving(-ish) confrontation/conversation with Elrohir's ghost - who's been waiting in Mandos for his wife and/or brother despite Mandos's INCREASINGLY strident blandishments to stop acting like a cat in a doorway and choose - and Laura and Elladan are both dead in suitably dramatic circumstances.

...or, Elladan is. Apparently John Winchester didn't die until s2e1! So, what happens is:

- (earlier in the s1 finale episode, Laura, noticed something once or twice which her daughters didn't - saw a curl of smoke, seemed to be examining a McGuffin extra closely...)

- Laura has been mildly injured, and someone needs to guard a McGuffin or maybe a random innocent civilian caught up in this, so she stays behind while Phina and Martha go off to deal with whatever the actual big bad of the season is. Maybe a cult trying to sacrifice half-elves for some reason? Directed, though not personally managed, by whatever killed Elrohir in the first place, which is...I gotta figure an OC balrog? Like, not one of the big ones from canon. We'll just call her (Laura's) Bane henceforth.

- not long later, while Phina and Martha are fistbumping in the remains of the cult's hideout Seraphina maybe have used chemical explosives), or maybe discretely looting Elladan's body for useful weapons laying their uncle to rest, the scene cuts back to Laura

- she's pacing, patrolling. Ready for a fight. She senses something and goes even tenser, drawing her ancient sword. It glows softly blue - but this is no orc. Heavy footsteps, flickering shadows and firelight, maybe the sound of wings. We do not see the enemy, just a middle-aged woman in improvised combat gear with a pistol in one hand and a Gondolin-made sword in the other, and a look of iron determination and defiance. She pulls off the bandage on her arm, revealing that she'd faked her injury so the girls would leave her behind.

- "I knew it was you," she greets her old enemy, unflinching, as a faint reprise rings unnoticed in the Great Music. She moves to attack, met by a whip-crack and a flash of fire, and cut to black.

Season 2 starts where s1 ended, for Martha and Seraphina. They're almost back at their car (the beloved 1967 Chevy Shadowfax). Note: few times in s1, Phina has had strange visions or nightmares, never anything prophetic but once a good clue to defeating the MotW...

She reels with the force and horror of this one. Darkness, utter and choking, pierced eventually by a single desperate torch. A dark and empty hall where there should be life and light. Flickering firelight reveals blood on the floor...

She gasps, "Mom," and demands that Martha drive, drive, fucking drive faster already -

They're too late, of course. Laura is long-since dead.

...so, back to Monster of the Week, with additional focus on tracking down the Bane!

Seraphina's strange dreams and visions get more frequent, more memorable. Sometimes they're peaceful, full of beautiful Light. More often they're dark, or at least, dim - climbing strange, starlit mountains (finding a cousin of aconite which turns out to also be useful for defeating werewolves). Choking grief as her hand brushes the air just above a vibrant tapestry, too afraid to ruin it with touch. Fire in her throat as she shouts world-shaking words in a language she doesn't remember (she repeats them a moment later, fending off a corrupted wind-spirit, and it flinches even before Phina feels a burst of vicious, raging, burning strength.)

Seraphina is curious as hell and keeps pushing herself to learn more, see more. Do more. It's not just visions, eventually - she starts to read minds, here and there. She's always been a fidgeter, happiest with some petty creative task of wire and beads or yarn in her hands, but now she can swear that sometimes her craft supplies sing at times, directly surpassing her ears, and she can make things with quality, with power. A new-knitted scarf is sturdy as a gorget. Glass beads glow. The more Phina does, the more she's frustrated rather than satisfied - she knows she's missing something, and she HATES being ignorant. Being wrong.

Martha, always the responsible one, especially feeling the need to be so now that their mom has died, wishes she would stop. Wishes she wouldn't put herself, put both of them, in danger like this. Martha is literally game to fight an orc with her fists one on one, any day of the week; she's no stranger to a quick temper and impulsive action. But she grew up! Why can't her sister!

(Martha: [venting the above to a stranger in a bar or something. Meanwhile, Seraphina has found an medieval Songbook and is trying to, like, apply principals of Elvencraft to chemical engineering. more arguing ensues.])

Toward the end of the season, there's, idk, several murders at the site of a geothermal drilling experiment in the North Sea, and oh shit, Bane is trying to get something that came out of that drill shaft! Violent interrogation of some evil minions reveals that it's no less precious thing than a Silmaril! Our heroes read about those recently in some ancient tome! (Phina got a headache so bad, and a sense of being aflame, that she passed out.)

In the third-to-last episode of the season, they hunt the Silmaril to the unlucky random research facility to which it's been taken. Mundane authorities and/or scientists are already coveting it as a potential energy source, adding extra mooks...who mostly just die when Laura's Bane arrives. But our girls get to it just slightly faster. The jewel is in a jead-lined box. Phina has been increasingly consumed by single-minded focus on getting this thing; even as the Ban storms in all fire and darkness, she's furiously picking the lock. She flings back the lid; we see a shining gold-white jewel - and the Light consumes the screen.

The second-to-last episode starts with pure Light - then it fades to simple Mingling, as the Noldor hold a funeral for Miriel. They had rites for the fallen in their starlit home of old, when they knew no return. They are having a modified version now, knowing that in her weariness she will, at least, take a very long time; in the hope that it will help those who loved her move through their grief.

- young Fëanor (age 5ish), tears running down his cheeks, whispers to his father that he is sorry, so sorry he killed her. Finwë denies it fiercely, lovingly, and holds him tight. Indis approaches, seeking to offer comfort; Finwë sees her over Fëanor's head and, gratefully, shakes his head. She retreats.

- but in the next memory, it is Fëanor (age 10ish) who watches Finwë and Indis, as they move joyously in unison around their wedding dance floor. Someone says something to him, he responds bitterly.

- (I'm not sure exactly what narrative of Fëanor's life I want to construct here, but assume subsequent memories/short scenes include: dislike of half-siblings (ft. fear of loss/abandonment masked as superiority complex), finding genuine joy and contentment in craft, exploration, and Nerdanel & their children; Melkor & rising tensions with Fingolfin, the Silmarils, the sword Incident, banishment (ft. savage dislike of Valar), Finwë's death (the same memory that struck when Laura died!), the Oath, Alqualondë, the theft and burning of the ships...and Amrod...and shortly thereafter, Fëanor himself, in a rush that only wasn't suicide because he really thought he could bust in and kill a Vala right up until he realized he absolutely could not do that.)

- (very fast final montage of key events post death, only snapshots, maybe styled as tapestry seen from Vairë's Halls? Fingolfin, crowned, raising Maedhros from a bow and embracing him; the glorious hosts and castles of the Noldor, Dagor Bragollach, Fingolfin's death, Doriath & Celegorm, Caranthir, Curufin's deaths, Sirion & Amras's death (both with the Silmaril evading them in the background), Morgoth's defeat by Host of the West with Eärendil shining far overhead, the final attack/theft, Maedhros's death, Maglor flinging the third into the sea and collapsing)

- camera close on Seraphina's face as she opens her eyes. They are shining with Light. She says, "Fuck."

FINAL EPISODE OF S2 STARTS WITH:

- a few second earlier: Martha sees from across the room as Phina opens the box and a joyous Light shines forth, and her sister collapses. The Silmaril falls and rolls.

- Martha doesn't have time to see where it rolls, because she has to fight the monster that killed both her parents. We've seen Laura's Bane in the shape of a woman with cavern-black hair and fiery eyes a few times before, and when it killed Laura and Elrohir, we glimpsed much more. But 2 episodes ago was the first time we saw it in all its terrible, burning darkness. The building is falling apart around it. There were a couple security guards and a scientist here; they're dead within moments.

- like her mother, Martha started out with a gun and a sword. She quickly gives up on the gun - it IS a special magic gun, but she's just better with a sword. She's snarking at the monster as she fights, because this is a gritty urban fantasy show so she's going to die, but by Eru she's going to die with sarcasm on her lips.

- the Bane's whip finally catches her around the wrist. It's not clear if it's the pain of the break or the burn that makes her drop her sword. The Balrog steps over it and grabs her by the throat. Darkness enwraps her, the searing, choking claws and the all-encompassing wings and the swallowing of her vision -

- Light pierces it like a blade. The Balrog falls back, dropping Martha to the floor.

- there stands her sister, Silmaril raised, almost glowing herself with its Light. Her eyes blaze with the particularly fiery Light that was always Fëanor's.

- Power in her voice, in English she says, "I am Seraphina Elrohiel [cool epithet she's picked up as a hunter]"; in the most traditional lisping Quenya she adds, "and I am Fëanáro Finwë-Curufinwë." English again: "I wrought this jewel five ages of the world ago…and to be honest, I don't really know what I can do with it now."

- - (the soundtrack crescendos, the Music crescendos; unseen, all around Arda and beyond, beings tuned into the Great Song of Ëa know that Fëanor once again holds a Silmaril, and go oh, shit, fuck!!)

- she smiles, fey and burning. "Do you think it's a good idea to stay and find out?"

- Laura's Bane flees with a snarl.

- Martha gets to her knees, and no further. She's panting, still catching her breath, bleeding and bruised and burned, and staring up at her incandescent sister(?).

- Seraphina (who is, has always been, Fëanáro Curufinwë) stays standing and glaring for a moment more, making sure the enemy has truly gone. Then -

- - [note: it came up, in their hasty recent recent research into the Silmarils while chasing them, that they are blessed such that evil hands can't touch them. they'd hoped this would be protection against the Bane, if they got there too late to stop it]

- - [note: in the very very brief memory-views of Maedhros and Maglor's last moments, it was clear that their grips on the Silmarils were agony]

- Phina falls to her knees, Silmaril dropping from her hand without protest. Once again it rolls offscreen, glow faded but still bright. All force of presence gone, she cradles her burned hand and sobs in agony and irreparable loss, not to mention the sheer overwhelming experience of everything.

- older sister instincts (again: despite the fact that they're twins) gets Martha moving when nothing else did. Still not actually sure what just happened, she crawls forward and hugs her sister.

...then they get out of there. Martha picks the Silmaril up carefully with a piece of cloth and puts it back in the lead-lined box, and Phina carries the box. For the rest of the episode, they hunt down Laura's Bane before it can escape them utterly - unless it tries to come back and get the Silmaril while they're still off-balance, which is entirely possible! Either way, they kill it so dead!

Season ends with the two of them sitting in a dingy motel room, or maybe back in the Shadowfax [car], staring at the Silmaril box. Martha says, "So...what do we do with this?" Phina says, "We find out what the hell happened to the other two!"

IN SEASON THREE...

...I stop having particularly coherent ideas for what happens, is what happens in season three

honestly, I was originally conceiving of this as 5 seasons a la Supernatural didn't it have a great show finale in 2010? so great. thank goodness they didn't make 10 more seasons for some canonically godforsaken reason. But Fëanor retrieving even just one Silmaril would so kick off an s4 level of divine intervention and incipient apocalypse...

I dunno, or maybe they CAN have a full season of Monster of the Week plus arcing plot which is half standard hunting, half various supernatural entities tracking them down either to steal the Silmaril or to kill Fëanor (again) for her many crimes?

They retrieve 1 Silmaril that season, while evading, idk, I guess Sauron is our Lilith equivalent... And it WOULD be fun to have s4 start with Martha kicking open Mandos's doors (she's holding 2 Silmarils; she can kick open whatever doors she wants) and demanding her obnoxious sister back...

(We COULD do a thing where the Valar deliberately put Fëanor back asap, but lbr they...would probably rather not, even if they need her alive to do certain things. On the other hand, if they did, what a fun conflict for her! On the third hand, SOMEONE has to Lúthien the other's Beren at least once - not that Martha is singing. She's going more for the 'threatens Ainur with swords' side of her heritage.)

(That WOULD create a fun 'Martha has been doing increasingly badass and angsty shit offscreen (while Seraphina was dead)' scenario that could lead smoothly into some flashbacks about what Martha was doing before the show started - namely, increasingly badass (and angsty) shit while Seraphina was in college...)

Because in terms of focus, the first 2 seasons are a little more about Seraphina. Having not Ranged for a while, she's more the audience's pov character to start, and then the big plotty drama is focussed on her in s2...and in s3, as they hunt the next Silmaril and she adjusts to being... That is, Fëanor adjusts to being...

She was Fëanor for a MUCH longer time than she's been Seraphina, but she's been Seraphina more recently and kinda more...vividly? She hasn't fully processed being Fëanor. Her hröa is human (and female-shaped and human-female-gendered, and elves don't define gender the same way and don't have gendered pronouns at all, so she's sticking with 'she/her' and it's not a big deal), and her fëa has been acting human, so her memory capacity is still mostly human, as are her reflexes, her need for sleep, etc... She's getting better, but it takes time.

But boy has this enhanced ALL of Seraphina's natural attention-seeking, forward-leaping, fight-starting, prideful, self-centered Protagonist(TM) behavior!

Which is driving Martha CRAZY, all the moreso because there's reason for it now. Aside from the fact that even with no memory of her past life, Seraphina was always brilliant, while Martha was just...normal at best. Clumsy and un-witty except with a weapon in her hand. Prone to sulking and shyness. Downright unlucky, while the universe seems to shower blessings on her sister.

Even when Fëanor is trying not to start a fight, she's so condescending. to her sister who is a mere mortal Man. Having been one for 25-odd years - still being one, in fact - Fëanor has lost much of her suspicion of Man as an usurping species (it was never really about Men anyway). But she's SO condescending.

(Martha IS her sister, still. Martha can hold the Silmaril without the Oath pushing Seraphina to burning wrath, because she is Fëanor's kin.)

(Though "Fëanor's kin" was only ever a stand-in for, roughly, "people Fëanor could trust to temporarily hold a Silmaril because he knew they'd give it back to him instantly if he asked." So, as the rift deepens between then, as she grows paranoid again...)

...returning to the point above: as Seraphëanor steps up as Person Who Can Explain Advanced Supernatural Shit, audience pov connects a little more with Martha. Also because Fëanor's radius of destruction is really fun to watch from the outside.

Yeah...Seraphina gets pretty high up her own ass over the course of s3, then dies, maybe heroically or maybe as foolishly as last time, then post-season hiatus smash cut to Martha kicking in Mandos's front door and dragging her back to life... I do love that.

SEASON FOUR...

After the shock wears of, the classic Fëanorian paranoia isn't helped by the fact that Martha IS keeping secrets. What she's been doing, who she's been doing it with...(some Maia, maybe even an Úmaia?) Though Arda's mythology doesn't have the same Heaven/Hell dichotomy as Earthly Christianity, so alaos we can't have the sexy sexy s4 thing of an angel on one sister's shoulder and a devil on the other's...

But basically I think s3 has to have been somewhat of a tragedy, as Túrin (unknowing) and Fëanor (just bad at this) played out their old tragedies in tandem. Rashness was often the undoing of both. Leaping to conclusions, action or both, though usually in opposite directions. With maybe a dash of parallels with ancient (ie, Second Age) Elf vs Man conflict - Martha is increasingly down on herself, but also, jealous of Seraphina's Protagonist Energy and increasingly ready to do some violence about it.

And none of that resolves in s3! Seraphina just gets killed!

So in s4, they have to figure it out. Seraphina needs to learn some sort of (gasp) humility, and how to let grievances (and loved ones) go. Martha needs to learn how to cope with regret and grief with means other than changing her name and moving to a different city.

(She's already starting, though! This time, she asked "what would Seraphina do', then broke into Mandos and demanded solutions!)

(...and Mandos, perhaps, was very ready to refuse until he got a good look at her fëa, silently went 'huh' in recognition, and waved them out.)

Then Martha starts having strange dreams and visions - maybe after they fight an ancient dragon? or maybe she already was, in the s3-s4 gap (after fighting an ancient dragon with her new Maia friend?)

Seraphina is initially PSYCHED about this- twinnies for real!! But they get some entity to look at Martha's fëa and they confirm that she's 100% a Man.

Monster of the Week episodes are still the main focus btw. Vampires and werewolves, cursed magical objects, rogue petty nature maiar, peacekeeping between factions of non-humans still dwelling secretly here and there... Though perhaps the masquerade is starting to fracture?

And, of course, some (other?) Maia has shown up and informed them that Sauron is embodied again and trying to complete a ritual to break a hole in the envelope of the world to let Melkor back in, which our heroes must stop!

Also, definitely need to get the 3rd Silmaril back this season. They got the one in the earth and the one in the sea...

- so, a fan favorite recurring character [a/n: IT'S MY IMAGINARY TV, I CAN IMAGINE THE FANDOM'S REACTIONS, TOO, AND ALSO TBH I'M CERTAIN I COULD DELIBERATELY CRAFT A FAN FAVORITE CHARACTER] is the twins' Uncle Earl, who isn't technically their uncle but rather an old family friend of their mother's. He is, in short, kind of an old kook. Some flavor of Southern - I'll flip a coin and say Louisianan? Lives on a houseboat, refuses to go ashore unless absolutely necessary because "the feds'll get me." Visiting nieces means there's someone else to go get groceries and gasoline (necessary, but he doesn't trust most delivery services or modern technology, either), so they've possibly never seen him set foot on land except maybe once on an isolated beach in rural Oregon. Fought in Korea. Has probably looked grizzled since age 12. Eats mostly fish, talks to birds, talks back to the radio.

- to be clear, this guy is not filling the Bobby 'faux-parent' role. ...okay maybe he is a little, emotionally. But he's not involved in "the family business." In terms of SPN characters, he's roughly Garth - appears once a season or so, is a delight for 1 episode, then we part ways. He calls Martha in s1 because there's been some "weird deaths" in the port he's in right now, and he knows they deal with "this sort of thing" but he can't get ahold of Laura. There's a mention of him in s2, that they called to tell him Laura had died. In s3, they need to lay low for a while so they join him on his boat for a few weeks, go stir-crazy and end up fighting a sea monster.

- Idk if he calls them again in s4 or they're trying to lie low again or they just run into him by chance...but they're dealing with MotW murders in some swampy Florida shore-town and on his ship (The Flower) when something much bigger than a swamp monster catches up with them. Say, Sauron sent an unstoppable Carcharoth-sized wolf monster, or maybe a super-vampire (some aerial combat would be fun), or just some Úmaia miniboss that a season or two would've been a season-climax boss fight...

- they're moored up when it arrives. Phina curses, Martha shouts for Earl to drive, drive the boat out as far and fast as he can! Earl was half-asleep at the table; he starts awake demanding if it's the feds?! Phina leaps to the wheel herself and slams the gas, while Martha grabs the old shotgun off the wall and fires at the giant shadowy wolf-monster.

They leave it howling on the pier. They'll have to go back and face it eventually, but they're not ready right now. Maybe they can even re-land far upshore, and it'll have lost their scent again...

- the giant shadow-wolf finishes howling starts chasing them running on the water

- Martha curses, and shouts Phina to drive faster. Earl (looking over Martha's shoulder, also cursed, almost impressed, at the sight of the wolf) tells her to give him the wheel. Phina shoves him away and shouts back as she yanks the wheel that they need to turn back, they can't win this fight on the water -

- the wolf is snapping at the Flower's keel. Phina curses in Valarian and yells at Earl to take the wheel and steer them back to land, while she runs back to help Martha fight the wolf.

- Earl flips a red lever in the [boat mechanics] cabinet under the wheel which we've probably seen before (Seraphina fixed something in s1), labeled "High Octane" and shouts, "Hold on, girls!" He slams the throttle again and the whole houseboat hydroplanes. The wolf falls overboard; Phina goes with it but Martha grabs her.

- the wolf gets to its feet on the water, and starts chasing them again

- "Confession time, girls!" Uncle Earl calls, steering the boat beyond full throttle while Martha and Phina get to their feet. "I did befriend your ma's dad while he was fighting in Korea. He whispered to the stars at night, when he felt lost." Adjusts a standing spyglass, tugs a string a couple times to turn on the lanterns on the prow and above the steering console, dons his navy blue-and-gold captain's hat. "I thought I couldn't have been happier to guide him home - then Elrohir met his Laura, and they fell in love. And had the two of you!"

- "Do you have a point?" Phina shrieks. She's scrambling to get her jacket out of her bag under one of the seats, because her Silmarils are in its pockets and the shadow-wolf is gaining. Martha, shooting at the wolf again, glances back, maybe having noticed that the old anecdote is phrased differently than before. Old Uncle Earl is standing unusually straight, his grizzled-gray hair gold-ish in the warm lantern light.

- "Yes!" he calls, jerking the boat away from the wolf again. Some of his Louisiana accent has fallen away, too. "Don't lose your wits - and keep holding on to something!"

- he tugs the light-cord again and the yellowy lantern-case above the wheel opens, and the light that shines forth is far brighter and paler. Its source falls into his hand as the lantern shakes with the Flower's speed, and he sets it on the brim of his hat - the illusion of which fades, leaving only the golden band on his brow with the Silmaril set upon, and Eärendil standing as tall, young, and golden-haired as when he first sailed the sacred seas. He gives the wheel another stern yank and the ship's prow rises even higher - and keeps rising, with the rest of the Flower in tow - the Foamflower, Vingilotë, every plank now aglow.

- "Also," he admits, looking over his shoulder to make sure neither of the twins has fallen off (again), "I'm your great-grandfather. I really am sorry to have - hey!"

- that's for Seraphina, who is Fëanor, Oath blazing in her heart, regaining her balance, sprinting up the deck and lunging with wrath in her eyes for the Silmaril.

- Eärendil dodges smoothly, while still keeping one hand on the wheel. "I said," he says reprovingly - while Martha bodily tackles her sister to the floor - "keep your wits Fëanáro. I'm here to help, as I ever have been for the people of Arda."

- the girls wrestle on the deck for a few more seconds before Seraphina calms down. It helps that they realize the wolf had grown giant wings of shadow and is chasing them aloft as well.

- btw: late in s4, the dwarvish researcher who's Bobby's fill-in and/or Martha's probably-trustworthy Maia friend should really be present as well for all of the above, but this ain't really about them. So I think they're just kinda. awkwardly Present for this family not-reunion. helping fight the wolf & all that.

- (Eärendil doesn't actually give back the Silmaril. But he lets Seraphina hold it for a few minutes, during which she is more at peace than she has been in millennia, and promises to let her have it again if/when she really needs it, if it isn't more urgently needed elsewhere. This is, more or less, satisfying to the Oath: as discussed "Fëanor's kin" was only ever shorthand for "people whom Fëanor could trust to hold a Silmaril without ever withholding it from him.")

Eeexcept it turns out that even Eärendil doesn't know that the Valar DO want Morgoth back, because they're kinda totally down to have Dagor Dagorath and reboot the world. Look it'll be great - Túrin - that's you, Martha - will help Eonwë and Tulkas slay him, then Fëanor will break the Silmarils, releasing the Light so that Eru can use it to Remake the world, Unmarred this time - Hey, where are you Children going? Stop stabbing people! Stab only the people we tell you to stab!

(Ulmo, ever wise, offscreen: When has that EVER worked? Especially with Fëanáro and his kin?)

Yeah, there's a scene very much like the end of SPN s4, wherein Martha gets grabbed by the celestial "good guys" and they admit that this is all kinda set-up but don't worry - here's your destined fuckoff-huge black sword, just wait a few minutes for your "sister" to once again achieve an evil end that's the exact opposite of what she intended; and then Martha has to convince the Maia she's been befriending all season to help her escape and go rescue Seraphina before she jumpstarts the apocalypse...

(Nb: Martha was already trying to stop Sauron from freeing Morgoth when the season started - she broke Seraphina out of Mandos party bc she loved and missed her sister, partly because she needed a Silmaril expert. But she's grown skeptical of the task somehow, while Seraphina - perhaps because Seraphina - has gotten vengefully obsessed with it. As Fëanor is wont to do. Hell, she has even more reason than she used to - she knows what Sauron did to her grandson.)

So, y'know

They do, of course, accidentally free Morgoth.

On the plus side, in the process, they get to jointly murder the SHIT out of Sauron, who was the REAL mastermind behind much of Laura's Bane's actions (and, honestly? Might've been the real one who killed Laura, and only set it up to look like a Balrog. Flames and shadows both can have many masters!)

SEASON FIVE, THE FINAL SEASON DEFINITELY FOLLOWED BY NO FURTHER SEASONS despite the temptation of a terrible sexy humanoid Ungoliant

I only have 3 ideas for season 5:

1. They go to Valinor at some point, of course. Perhaps to rally aid? The first elf they find, they introduce themselves grandly, Fëanor and Túrin Turambar here seeking allies to fight Morgoth! and the elf says blankly, "I have never heard of either of you." *squints* "You're Men, you say? Lord Ulmo keeps a Man on Tol Eressëa, I think. You could go to him?" But after that, as a running joke all episode, every other elf they meet recognizes Fëanor on sight (she has a very distinctive fëa) and immediately punches her in the face...and every other elf recognizes Tùrin on sight and all but tackle-hugs Martha while shouting joyfully that they never expected to see him again. Some (Beleg) actually do tackle-hug her (and nearly gets stabbed again) (#worthit).

2. To everyone's surprise, including the other Valar, Morgoth started his war upon creation subtly when he returned...but doesn't remain subtle for long, nor do those opposing him. By the end of the season, the masquerade that non-human sentient peoples and various other supernatural beings still live in Arda is all but shattered.

3. Then it's THOROUGHLY shattered in the finale. I don't know if the general human populace participates in the final battle - though I am SO weak for a moment when, like, the regular-ass armed forces, who are not necessarily allies to the heroes, show up to help fight a massive superhuman threat. When the SHIELD helicarrier shows up to evacuate civilians in Age of Ultron, when UNIT does pretty much anything in Doctor Who...I love it when the best protections & warriors the mundane human race could pull together also show the fuck up and help save the day because damnit, this is their planet too. ...Which is, in fact, very on-theme for Tolkien. So yes, actually, this definitely happens. Probably there's some conflict with US military forces mid-season, our heroes have to talk (fight & escape) their way out of being arrested for blowing up a national landmark while fighting a balrog, and the general in charge whom they'd half-convinced returns in the finale with a battalion to slam some missiles into Morgoth...

oh, and 4: Ar-Pharazón et al totally do come back from the dead. Probably on Morgoth's side lbr. They get a twisted undead immortality wherein they cannot die, just go on fighting for the dark lord to whom they once turned in jealous worship...

More importantly...

Okay, I really don't know exactly how the Dagor Dagorath goes. We're following the version that Eärendil will chase Morgoth from the skies; Tulkas, Eonwë and Túrin will fight him upon the field and Túrin will avenge his House and all the Race of Men by slaying him; and Fëanor will break the Silmarils and Yavanna will use their Light to remake the Trees, and the lands will be leveled or in some cases raised from the depths, and everyone will live happily ever after except possibly Men who aren't mentioned beyond Túrin.

This is what the Valar expect to happen (though they don't actually know-know Eru's plans.)

What happens instead is...

Most of the Morgoth-defeating does go exactly like that. Except probably they don't kill him for good - they CAN'T, because the Marring of the world is part of what Morgoth is, and the only way to undo him completely is to remake the world completely.

Which maybe could be done, by Eru if no one else, if He were beseeched? Which might be done with the strength of the Silmarils, their Light released?

And Seraphina does break the Silmarils. That's important for her - giving up her Protagonist role, just as slaying Morgoth - embracing her Protagonist role - is important for Martha.

...but I don't think they give the Light back to Yavanna. No offense to the Trees, but they never illuminated most of Arda anyway, and the world is round now anyway - and making it flat again would fuck it up - and we have, like, electrical lights, now.

Hell, maybe Seraphina is ready to give up the Light... Her instinct is to hold it back, to follow her own novel plans with it, but, oh, to regain what was lost! And she has come around on...some of the Valar. Selectively. Yavanna's one of the okay ones.

- but Martha, half-dead from the battle, drops to her knees beside her and catches her hands before she can loose the Light upward unto the grasp of the Tree-Queen.

- "Together?" Martha says (Túrin Turambar, ever the greatest Men had to offer - bull-headed, loyal, brave, unafraid of death, loving and losing and loving again).

- Seraphina's trembling lips curve into a fierce grin (Fëanäro Curufinwë, ever the greatest Elves had to offer - brilliant in mind and spirit, devoted, ever seeking to preserve and glorify the beauty of the world, and eventually learning some wisdom about letting go).

- "Together," she agrees.

- together, they hold the Light that once shone in the Trees, the Lamps, and the Flame Eternal of Creation itself; and as they release it, reach for the Great Music of Ëa that is deep in both their blood - for they are the daughters of Elrohir, son of Elrond, son of Elwing daughter of Dior son of Lúthien Tinúviel, daughter of Melian the Maia; and indeed, even before that, they are both trueborn Children of Eru, are they not? - and eschew utterly the Choice of the Peredhel by leaving the world round but Un-Sundering the Sea, that the kindred might still live apart, if they wished it - the Elder in their land undying, the Younger in their realms of quick and sometimes joyful, often savage change - but that they might visit one another, at least, as they pleased.

(I mean, wasn't the false division of siblings the whole problem from the start?)

Random Additional Features of this Show/AU/Thing

All elf and ainu side characters, canonical and not, will be cast gender-blindly, and characters referred to with the understanding that elvish personal pronouns don't necessarily correlate with physical phenotype, but Ainur do generally try to match local standards of gender assignment. Dwarves will all use he/him (and have beards!) even when fairly clearly female.

I have no idea what Martha is doing for gender once she remembers being Túrin. With all the time Túrin spent with Elves, she probably rolls pretty smoothly with being she/her now, though it's weird. Her memories definitely integrate more easily than Fëanor/Seraphina's, though, as much because she's the same kind of being both times as because there's less of them.

Both protagonists are definitely bisexual. Martha has a range of love interests; it's a running joke (at first) that Seraphina has a total Thing for redheads. Any kind of redhead. But especially creative ones - any kind of art or invention.

The role of Gabriel WILL be played by Maglor, albeit with a different death (don't worry, he'll be back for the finale) and much more...gloominess. And angst. Okay, and maybe his first appearance, in s1 or 2, IS cursing them - not knowing who they are - into a musical episode. (A WOMAN HAS NEEDS; THE WOMAN IS ME.)

When Martha meets Fingolfin and/or any of Fëanor's other siblings, probably in s5 but maybe s4, they immediately Vibe completely. It's the shared experience of growing up with Fëanor for a sibling. Needless to say, Seraphina Hates This.

Their chief researcher friend is a dwarf, who is also on the young-ish side I think, and a woman (he/him).

There's gotta be a notable hobbit on the Team before the end, too...but overall, hobbits remain symbolically representative of the Civilians in this war story.

Durin is alive again somewhere. Durin usually reincarnates in time to guide his people through particularly difficult times - or, to try. Their dwarf friend - what the hell, I'll just call him Bobby - tries SO hard to be Cool about meeting him, and fails SO hard.

I generally prefer to judge and characterize the Valar and associated Maiar as fallible to the point of clumsiness or negligence but basically wise and thoroughly benevolent...but I AM willing to throw some of them under the characterization bus for ease of making conflict in this hypothetical CW show.

...I probably have many more random thoughts but it's 3am and I want to post this whole insane thing. Feel free to ask me questions if you have them! And/or petition both the Tolkien estate and a major TV network for the rights, money, and support to help me make the terrible but wonderful show we deserve!

[valiantsilver]

Pokémon Sw/Sh but it’s a British high school

Allister:

* Year Seven

* Wears a face mask everywhere

* Never speaks in class even if he’s called on

* Has a hard time talking to others so mostly just sticks around Bea

Hop:

* Year Eight

* Wants to be a linguist just like his older brother

* Sonia has seen his grades however and she knows he’s destined to be a STEM kid

* Has gotten multiple reprimands for running in the halls

Marnie

* Year Eight

* Not as shy as Allister but still pretty reserved

* Wears her leather jacket instead of her blazer (the teachers have given up on that one)

* Listens to music instead of paying attention in class but most teachers let it go since her grades are good and she isn’t disruptive

Bede

* Year Nine

* Gifted kid and absolutely insufferable about it

* Wants to go into STEM since he believes all the other subjects aren’t ‘real academics’

* Opal constantly points out how good his artwork is and he hates it (secretly loves it)

Bea

* Year Ten

* Grew up as Allister’s neighbour, sees him as a younger brother and is very protective of him

* Great at PE, not so great at other subjects

* GCSEs have her low-key stressed but she’d rather die than admit it

Milo

* Geography teacher

* The chill teacher who will just stick on a movie when he doesn’t have a lesson planned

* Students go to him for hugs when they’re feeling under the weather because Milo hugs are top tier 👌

* Super nice but low-key doesn’t know how to control his students when they get wild

Nessa

* English teacher

* Is a great teacher when she isn’t distracted by giving her students fashion advice

* Fishes outside of teaching as well as modelling - once brought a fish she had caught that morning into school and stored it in her filing cabinet

* Absolutely despises the idea that ‘maybe the curtains are just blue’ and will go on long rants about the issues with anti-intellectualism and lack of critical thinking

Kabu

* PE teacher

* Students will make fun of him for being old only to get absolutely thrashed by him in literally any sport

* Close to Bea who sees him as a mentor and confidant - as well as talking about her exam stress she also told him her worries that Allister wasn’t settling into high school well, so Kabu now keeps an eye on him as well

* Taught Raihan before he also became a teacher at the school and always reminds him how proud he is of him

Opal

* Art teacher

* Doesn’t actually show up half the time, she’ll be gone for several weeks and everyone will be convinced she’s dead only for her to just reappear with no explanation

* All of her exemplar art is pink

* She can see Bede’s artistic talent and natural inclination towards art (even if he tries to repress it), tries to encourage him to express himself more

Gordie

* History teacher

* Super young teacher, like it’s his first or second year after finishing his teaching course

* Randomly stops lessons to show his students some kind of crazy stunt he learnt like a double back flick or smth idk

* Hides the fact that Melony is his mother from students because he knows how viscous they can be

Melony

* Chemistry teacher

* Constantly finds excuses to make fake snow as an experiment

* Hate the fact that Gordie won’t acknowledge her as his mother while at work

* Once intercepted a note from her students that called her a ‘milf’, asked Gordie what it meant later that day and he lost several years from his lifespan

Piers

* Maths teacher

* Addicted to coffee, students have learnt to steer clear of his desk due to coffee breath

* Never gives homework because he knows he won’t be arsed to mark it

* He asks Marnie what ‘the kids are into’ all the time so he can slip pop culture references into his lessons to seem more ‘cool’

Raihan

* Physics teacher

* You know that ‘Welcome to Physics’ vine? That’s Raihan’s classroom

* He has a very big social media presence and new students are always flabbergasted when they find out their physics teacher is also an influencer

* Constantly sets assignments/homework which involve students having to make some kind of social media post

Leon

* French teacher

* Teaches French but knows several other languages - Spanish, German, Italian, Japanese, Cantonese, etc

* Was a former student who got near perfect grades, all the older teachers love him, most students love him too because he’s a good teacher while still being fun

* Brags to his students every time Hop has some kind of minor achievement

Sonia

* Biology teacher

* Students love her because sometimes she sneaks her dog into school

* One of the few teachers who will put Bede in his place instead of encouraging his ego and superiority complex

* She and Nessa go over to each other’s houses every Saturday to mark papers together + gossip about work

Oleana

* Deputy Head

* Does most of the Head’s work anyway

* Low-key terrifying, students only come to her with very serious issues

* Nobody can figure why she’s so defensive of Rose when he constantly seems to dump his responsibilities as Head onto her

Rose

* Head Teacher

* Shows up to important meetings wearing a shirt and suit jacket on top and nothing but underwear underneath his desk

* Actually a very hard worker - he’s just working on something concerning the school that isn’t exactly for educational purposes

* Has attempted to form a parental bond with Bede after finding out he lost his parents at a young age, has not succeeded

[spicykaraage]

Tenipuri Complete Character Profile - Ryoga Echizen

[PROFILE]

Birthday: December 23rd (Capricorn)

Blood Type: O

Relatives: Father (Nanjirou Echizen), Mother

Father’s Occupation: Temple Priest (local)

High School: Unknown

Grade: Unknown

Committee: None

Strong Subjects: Linguistics

Weak Subjects: Lectures

U-17 Training Camp Position & Rank: First String | No.4 (resigned)

World Cup Team: U-17 World Cup USA Representatives ➜ U-17 World Cup Spanish Representatives

Favorite Motto: “You don’t need words for tennis.” (a quote he got from Nanjirou)

Hobbies: Napping, looking for delicious oranges

Favorite Color: Orange

Favorite Book: Astrophotography collections

Favorite Food: Oranges, chicken sautéed with orange ➜ Prosciutto and orange pintxos [TP]

Favorite Anniversary: The day before and after Christmas

Preferred Type: A person who can look at things from another person’s perspective

Ideal Date Spot: Being in the cool shade under a tree

His Gift for a Special Person: “I’ll go beyond your expectations.”

Where He Wants to Travel: “I’ve been all over the world… A carnival, maybe?”

Thing He Wants Most Right Now: A new racquet ➜ An aerial yoga hammock [23.5] ➜ “Take a wild guess.” [TP]

Dislikes: Rain, bean paste [TP], timetables [TP]

Skills Outside of Tennis: Breakdancing, getting around in the world [TP]

Routine During the World Cup: Teasing Ryoma

[DATA]

Height: 180cm

Weight: 67kg

Dominant Arm: Right

Vision: 1.4 Left & Right

Play Style: All-Rounder

Signature Moves: Destruction

Favorite Brands:

Racquet: WILSON TourBLX95

Shoes: YONEX POWER CUSHION25 MEN

Overall Rating: N/A

Kurobe Memo: “A lot of things are unknown about this player who Byoudouin brought back with him from overseas. Since he has Byoudouin’s approval, there's no doubt he has considerable potential.”

[POSSESIONS]

What’s in His Locker at the U-17 Training Camp:

An orange and a note that says “You’ve got a ways to go.”

What’s in His Travel Bag:

A comb that Duke used // He borrowed it when he was at the training camp and has yet to return it

[TRIVIA]

The Prince of Tennis II 10.5 Fanbook

Even though he’s been abroad, he is not good at English and avoids speaking it if he can. Even when he was in the US, he tried speaking Japanese as much as possible

He likes Fanta/Ponta like Ryoma, but orange-flavored

He carries oranges with him at all times

He is secretly good at jet-skiing

The Prince of Tennis II 23.5 Fanbook

He borrows clothes from his father, Nanjirou. Ryoma has stated he strongly resembles him

Unlike Ryoma, Ryoga is fine with doubles

The Prince of Tennis 20th Anniversary Book: Tenipuri Party

He thinks of Nanjirou as someone he admires and a wall he wants to surpass

One of His Off Days at the Training Camp:

10:00am - Wakes up, showers

11:00am - Has a light rally session with Ryoma

12:30pm - Lunch at the café (a hot dog and orange juice)

1:30pm - Takes a nap in a hammock

3:00pm - Takes a walk around the camp, teases Tokugawa and Ryoma

4:00pm - Watches the middle schoolers practice from the rooftop

5:30pm - Calls a certain somebody

6:00pm - Dinner, Duke and Kawamura’s temaki sushi party

7:00pm - Watches Byoudouin copy sutras

7:30pm - ???

11:00pm - Starts heading back, chats with the coaches at the bar

1:30am - Secretly takes a picture of Ryoma’s face while he’s asleep, then goes to bed

[ask-n]

@redlegend

"Pik-a?" They both turned, both having the same expression at the source less noise. Then there was a kid! They flew out of the bushes, a mess of tangled hair and scratches from stray stickers. Red's eyebrows shot up and Pikachu bounded off his shoulder, crunching his rib in and knocking some wind out of him. Pikachu came up to his midsection. Was he camping out here? A runaway? No. A wild child. The kid growled and chittered, body language shifting with the growls. It was like viewing a different language with similar parts to it. "Pi-kaaa." 'Hey! All of it is true. All of it!' Red stepped after Pikachu, one foot after the other through the shorter grasses. Red waved off the concern with a shake of his head. It's alright. Pikachu turned to him, and then the kid. 'Oh, he can't talk. Don't worry about it!'

' That's so cool! I'm like your biggest fan! ' Excited enough to finally stand up right with wide eyes, awe and all. Had pikachu been common in his neck of the woods he would've been even more impressed by their size in comparison! Incredible!

' Im a little guy myself compared to my friends n neighbors but I got moves when we're sparring! Im really slippery n quick but I wanna get as good as you for sure- '

But being so excited to see a legend N had entirely missed the human he was with. Perhaps he had blocked him out as some large branch he was perched on. The step forward stopped him mid conversation to look over with immediate alarm. The bouncy excitement was replaced with bristled hair and slow steps back.

' It's a human. We've been spotted. ' Said between a raised snarl and a slow crouch so N can get on all fours defensively. Should he have been listening to Pikachu perhaps he could see the other thing they have in common. He can't talk either. Not linguistically really. Anything human he did not recognize at all besides the occasional glance of a passerby through the brush he hid in or the horror stories of their greedy dark nature and the fellow 'mon they've kidnapped, imprisoned and brainwashed.

So understood anyways.

' Be careful. '

[suppotato123]

Thank you to everyone who voted on the last poll, and all the people who put their cool ideas in the tags. This is the new poll and it’ll have to be two parts because there’s too many degrees.

Thaumaturgical Artificing- The scientific study and application of magic as it pertains to Alchemy (the creation of of potions) and Arcana (the engineering of magical devices).

Advanced Applied Necromancy- A degree for those looking for the most modern and ethical methods of raising the dead. This is a degree for those looking for new and inventive ways to apply the Necromantic Arts to the betterment of society. Students can expect to learn the ways in which Necromancy can be applied to various fields such as medicine, criminal justice, and even industry, all wrapped up in serious discussions about ethics and consent.

Arcanic Archaeology- This degree walks students through the history of magical artifacts, how to find them, and their proper uses to aspiring Sorcerers and non-magic users alike.

Linguistic Incantology- The study of the properties of magical languages as well as the characteristics of those languages in general ascertained in order to gain mastery over the magical art of incantation.

Runic Studies- the study of the history of runes and sigils, their relevance in art, politics, and culture, and their various uses to the modern spell caster.

Magiphysical Sciences- The study of Humanoid systems, anatomy, and physical health and fitness as it pertains to magical gestures and more physically involved magic systems.

Mystic Virology- The study of magical diseases and curses, their effects on the humanoid form, and the treatments and counterhexes for such magical conditions.

Beasts Behavior and Health Sciences- This degree will prepare students for work with both wild and domestic fantastical creatures by giving them essential knowledge and essential skills in magical veterinary medicine and biology, grooming, feeding, and care, as well as wildlife rehabilitation.

Magical Performance Arts- A degree for those seeking to enchant and bewilder audiences of all ages. If you’re looking for something something showy and fun, look no further! Includes the option for courses like Enchantments and Shapeshifting.

Wandsmithing Technologies- This is a course for students looking to design wands. Students will learn to many essential lesson including, but not limited to, magidynamics, the magical components of many different wand building materials, and a comprehensive analysis on different wand styles throughout the ages. At the end students will have several wand prototypes and models under their belts.

Criminal Justice- Study how criminal justice organizations function, deal with people and their recurring problems, and create programs and policies that include and benefit the community. Here’s the twist; we add in a little magic to make your job easier. A popular magic class taken for this degree Scrying (with a warrant of course).

Supernatural Physics- the study of how and why magic came to be and how and why it works. Students will learn the structure of magic and how it interacts with other fundamental constituents of the universe.

Economic Divination- This degree provides studies in supply and demand, consumer behavior, and financial markets with an added twist. Students will learn the most reliable methods of divination to help insure future financial success.

Mystic Ecology- The study of relationships among living magical organisms, humanoids, and their physical environments. This degree looks at organisms at the individual, population, community, ecosystem, and biosphere level. Students can expect to learn how to use their magic to help repair damaged ecosystems, increase power output, and cast diagnostic spells to access what remediation is necessary.

Novel Entomology- The scientific study of magical species of insects, arachnids, myriapods, and crustaceans.

Magic History- The history of magic and it’s uses across different ages and cultures. This class will look at the different major events involving and influenced by magic and it’s interaction with society.

General Studies- This degree covers the most basic information on various magical studies and provides a great opportunity for students to discover their magical passions and/or complete their prerequisite courses before moving on to a more advanced degree.

[philosophicalparadox]

You know, I’ve been thinking.

There’s a particular mentality that I see quite often on Tumblr and all over the damn internet that I just don’t vibe with, and have never vibed with: the “Actions are (to varying degrees of exclusivity) what you should judge a person by” rhetoric.

And it wasn’t without some hard thinking as to why exactly that mentality bothers me, but I think I found the answer in a very ironic medium: because It’s quite literally A Slippery Slope.

How? Because judging actions without context very quickly becomes judging actions without evidence.

And it’s all fine to say, “well no one would be so dense as to not give context a chance to explain a person’s behavior” but that is actually what ends up happening more often than not with people of that particular mindset, because I notice a stunning overlap between people who believe actions are the best measure of morality and people who can’t distinguish explanations from excuses.

Which leads to a slippery and twisty rabbit hole of finding reasons why people’s context for their behavior is “just an excuse” and criminalising them anyway, even when their actions are perfectly justified.

I have known people like this IRL. I grew up with people like that, actually, so maybe I am a little biased towards the assumption of danger inherent in that mode of thinking.

But it really rubs me way the wrong way when people harp on about how reasons don’t matter as much as actions, when they actually mean that intentions are not an excuse for harm.

To quibble, the difference between an excuse and an explanation is rooted in fact, not feelings. There is a categorical and linguistic distinction between those:

Excuses are about deflecting responsibility. They’re quite often lies or exaggerations.

Example: a kid breaks a vase. He knows he will be in trouble for it, so instead of explaining why or how it happened, he tells a wild fib or something close to one so he avoids being in trouble; alternatively, say your boyfriend gets angry and breaks a mirror. Rather than confessing that he lost his cool and wants to fix it, he instead says things like “well I can’t help it when I’m angry” or “that wouldn’t of happened if you didn’t make me” etc.

very often excuses look identical to blame-shifting and has lots and lots of “but poor me” vibes.

Explanation is not about deflecting responsibility. It’s about explaining what happened and why. Simple right? Eh, not always so. More often than not children learn young that excuses by themselves don’t cut it, and learn to work explanations into their excuses to make them sound more believable. But the hallmark of an excuse never changes; it’s always about not being held responsible.

The issue is that too many people who see actions and outcomes as the main stalk for moral values is that they pick and choose when they want to call something an excuse based on how they feel about it. If an explanation seems untrue, it’s automatically an excuse, regardless of further proving or the person’s demonstrated willingness to accept responsibility. This is the fundamental spirit of callout posts. It no longer matters that you are trying your best to make amends if your actions condemn you simply for your having done them.

“But,” I hear some of the people I am sure reluctantly follow me these days say, “I’m not that hardcore! I just don’t like it when people give more attention to a person’s intentions than the fact that they’ve caused harm to me or someone else”

And that’s valid. What isn’t is making the assumption that because you can’t see what’s going on in the accused’s head, that you just automatically know what’s happening in there. What’s not cool is when you claim knowledge in ignorance of how and why things happen because “it doesn’t matter, it’s done now, and I want to see JUSTICE!”

And that, my dears, is why history repeats itself. That is why abusers walk free while victims are believed to be the perpetrators. That is why people get bullied in callouts that could not possibly matter less. Because when people cry “JUSTICE!” What they usually mean is “I want to see them bleed/be killed/be punished!” Not “they’ll get what is appropriate to them to render them harmless or to amend the problems they caused”

No one is owed forgiveness. But if you get SO fixated on “they did bad, therefore do bad to them” then maaaaaybe it’s time to examine why exactly you feel that way. And possibly get a therapist. (99% of the time it’s because of the way their, usually socially conservative, parents raised them)

And it all seems to start with “ But Actions Speak Louder Than Words” as a specific justification for “others Actions are the center of my moral philosophy and damn the consequences”

[bonefall]

I mean fermented doesnt necessarily mean alcoholic - after all kimchi is made with fermented cabage and bread is fermented too. So is yogurt and a ton of other things we eat. Theres even some meats that are fermented for dishes too.

This is very true! And I did look into a couple of other things that are fermented-- but the problem with cats having anything fermented at all is yeast.

(CW: I talk about yeast, fermentation, alcohol, and the horrors of what yeast can do to a cat's belly. Skip this one if medical discussion of a cat in pain upsets you!)

In fact it's good you mentioned bread, because I was just looking at different types of unleavened bread exactly for this reason. If a cat eats raw dough, yeast can actually ferment in their stomach! This does exactly what you think it would, it turns their body into a chemical nightmare, distending their belly and causing alcohol poisoning

(doing research for these projects is like taking a class on how DURABLE human being are, it's insane! This isn't even unique to cats! Pure carnivores are so fragile!)

The baking process would kill all the yeast inside of the bread, but I decided that I would just not work with it. Unleavened bread and alternate rising agents are cool so I decided to explore those instead. I even found this one really interesting tidbit about how apparently bannock from Britain and bannock from American Indigenous people in America may have evolved independently, down to the linguistic roots being different.

BUT ANYWAY back to yeast

So when I was looking at fermented products, I was looking for things where there isn't yeast present, but also checked off my other rules; namely, that Clan cats are obligate carnivores.

-Kimchi is fermented vegetables, a lot of work for a Warrior to get no nutritional value. Not to mention that without pepper, garlic, and fish sauce it's just... sad cabbage. (also go watch this cool video I found about one of the last traditional onggi pot makers left in Korea because this is actually a very beautiful craft and my life has been enriched by seeing how much care goes into this process)

-This also eliminates sauerkraut, which is a more region-friendly take on fermented cabbage. No nutritional value to the cats.

-Miso can be made from barley but it requires a region-unfriendly type of fungus (Re: The reason I usually start with British tech and work backwards, another example of this principle in action)

-Yogurt and Cheese are dairy products. Warriors are lactose intolerant to begin with, but also don't have an animal they can milk on a regular basis. I don't think a nearby sheep or cow would stay still long enough for a warrior to sit and milk them

What I DID find that we could make, though?

-Vinegar. As long as it's used sparingly and diluted, it can be used as a basis for other recipes including Worcestershire sauce. Though from what I read, cat aversion to the smell of vinegar is legendary.

But I will rule vinegar-based sauces under the 'Stronger Stomachs' exception.

In addition, vinegar is an EXCELLENT cleaning product and something I can keep in mind as an excellent antibiotic next to honey.

-Hard sausage. Pepperoni, chorizo, salami... aside from finagling with the spices I have access to, hard sausage is totally within my reach and sounds like a perfect ShadowClan recipe.

-Something that breaks down poison. I'm willing to be a little bit flippant about the biology of one type of insect or animal to make a Warrior Cat version of hakarl, specifically because I want to show off ShadowClan's crafty food culture and how good they are at creative problem solving.

This one will be in addition to "slug-purging", because I learned some really neat stuff about how to make wild gastropods safe to eat and it'll be a really really cool thing to include in a "How ShadowClan can eat things other Clans can't" type entry

Come to think of it, fermentation would definitely be a very ShadowClan-based activity...

And lastly,

Alcohol

It just feels... wrong to me that there would be a culture of sapient cats who don't use any alcohol at all. Getting tweaked on purpose is practically the mark of a species' intelligence. Dolphins, elephants, monkeys, crows... all recorded finding ways to turn their terrible brains off.

So I do want to make an entry on alcoholic fermentation too, it's just like I said though, it'll take a while to get to because I have dumb math brain and a To-Do list.

But for right now, I've got another ask to answer that will give you a good "basic" alcohol for your cats if you so choose