#literally like 2 hours MAX sometimes less

[fandsart]

Cw: Discussion of death, dissociation

Ever since Vecna, Steve will sometimes wake up convinced he’s dead. That those vines broke his neck. This can last anywhere from 2 to 45 minutes. Lately he’s having to set his alarm an hour earlier than he used to wake up just to account for this.

Robin was horrified when he told her. He explains that it’s not exactly scary. While the idea of dying is scary, the perspective of actually being there is mostly void and numb. She’s still concerned about the fact it’s happening, but less actually sympathetic to any ‘struggle’ it causes Steve. The only real struggle it causes Steve is in the realm of time management.

After some research, Robin concludes that it’s probably dissociation. After all the shit Steve’s been through, it isn’t unwarranted. With Max still in a coma, it’s not surprising he might feel a sort of disconnect from reality, his mind having to work to fully accept his reality as it is while waking. Plus the trauma of the situation, of which being choked out by the vines doesn't even begin to cover.

Usually he can’t move in this state. Well, he can move, but he doesn’t. He’ll turn his head and observe his surroundings, he’ll reposition when uncomfortable. It’s not that he doesn’t have control of his limbs, but the dead aren’t meant to go anywhere, and so to move would feel so unnatural. He’s not supposed to move, and it’s really hard to question succumbing to the mindset when you think you’re dead. Everything is void and numb, and when you’re dead, all there is left to do is stay where you are.

Sometimes he thinks about telling Dustin about his new issue, but Dustin has been kind of paranoid since Eddie died. Robin says it’s probably part of his mourning process. It’s like the bargaining step, but in advance. With the danger they know to be around them, now fully exposed to the reality that death can hit, even with all the preparations they could possibly put into place, there’s still a chance.

With all the supernatural stuff that’s happened, Steve doesn’t want Dustin to get the idea that Steve’s issue is anything prophetic. Robin says Dustin is smarter than that, but she also agrees that since it’s not really affecting anything tangibly, then him knowing doesn’t make much difference. Even after they killed Vecna.

He’s usually pretty conscious when in this state. Sure he thinks he’s dead, but he’s processing the world around him mostly fine. Thinks about how the others must be handling it. That’s really the worst part of this whole thing. Except this time he feels pretty out of it, and…

He needs to find his grave. He’s never felt a draw to move while dead before, but he desperately needs to find his resting place. He’s not supposed to be in the open air like this. Wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong.

He wanders, and loses himself, literally. Wanders some more. Finds his grave.

Steven Joseph Harrington.

So his parents came around to bury him then. Otherwise Robin would have known to omit the middle name, and she wouldn’t have let up about it if she were involved.

“Steve?”

He turns around. It’s Eddie. So he is dead after all.

↞⬡+¤+⬡↠

Ever since Vecna, Eddie will sometimes wake up convinced he’s dead. Gnawed to death by those bats. Sometimes it lasts longer than others. Today was particularly quick, which means he has time to visit Chrissy in her coma before heading to the cemetery.

He figures with all of everything that’s happened, it’s some kind of related outlet. He wonders if he’ll eventually get through this bat stuff and move on to waking up convinced he was fully convicted of murder, and not declared innocent.

Steve’s parents finally got back into town, meaning their orders to put his body on ice were overturned so they could have the funeral. That was yesterday, and the group agreed to hold their own little ceremony the next day. Which is today.

They agreed to meet at the gate to the cemetery, and Eddie didn’t think he was that early, but none of the others are here yet. Maybe it’s earlier than he thought. He still hasn’t bought a new watch since his old one got soaked. But it’s also possible that everyone else is having a hard time dragging themselves here. Eddie never had the chance to get that close to Steve, but he’s seen how affected the others are by his passing.

But it’s also possible that he lost track of time, in fact he thinks that he might have. He’s always doing that. Usually he’s late for things, but it isn’t unheard of for him to be obscenely early. Sometimes when he has plans to do things it just makes all of the time before it become designated as ‘waiting time.’ He didn’t check the clock before he left the hospital either. Come to think of it, the sun is still pretty low.

He tries waiting it out, but he’s very impatient. Eventually he decides to try to find the grave. Only Robin already knows where it is. It’d probably be good for more people to know, even though the reason they’re meeting at the entrance is so Robin can just show them, but still. And then he can just circle back to the front once he’s found it. No big deal.

Sure cemeteries tend to be pretty big, but Hawkins is a small town, and there’s a bit of a class division between burial sites. It doesn’t take long to find the area he’s sure the Harringtons would place themselves in.

There’s a familiar head of hair in the distance, but… that can’t be right. And yet the closer he gets, it’s not just the hair; the body type too.“Steve?” he asks even though he knows it can’t be him. But the man turns around and their eyes meet. And it can’t be anyone else either. That’s Steve, with a look of bewilderment and daze to compete with Eddie’s own.

Did anyone think I actually just had Steve die somehow? Just curious Also I don't actually have any further plans for this or what any of it means, but I would encourage anyone inspired to build off of this to do so. I'd be curious how others might want to play with the premise

[californiagoddess]

I have such a hard time quitting jobs, idk why. Even when I hate them with all my mind heart and soul (which is every customer service job to be fucking honest) I struggle to actually end it. So I need to keep in my mind all the reasons I hate it in order to have the strength to do it

The owner said I can't talk to my coworker friend during downtime

The owner and his friends and family come in almost every fucking day LOOKING for something to be wrong so they can berate us for it

The owner and his friends and family are all fucking assholes

The entire customer base is largely assholes and you're just supposed to accept it because "that's their culture" (I refuse to believe it's anyone's culture to treat people so disrespectfully)

The tips are fucking shit. My tip average the past 3 shifts has been 10% twice and 8% the last shift. Do you understand how fucking terrible that is. In this county it's supposed to be a 15% minimum if the service is just adequate and my service is always fucking PERFECT thank you. But I am going above and beyond for an eight fucking percent AVERAGE?! I don't fucking think so

The money is the same that I could make and have made doing significantly less stressful jobs. I have made more money just sitting on sets. Literally just sitting in holding sometimes never even making it to set, just fucking posting on tumblr all day, I have made more money than shifts that made me want to cry blood.

I have been there for one single month and I already feel like I know everything. I'm already SO FUCKING BORED! Back in the day I'd at least have a learning curve to keep me occupied but I think I have maxed out my server stats and there is no growth anymore. At the interview the manager made it sound like this was such a super challenging job soooo different from everything else but it's really not. It's just a normal restaurant job in a disorganized restaurant. It's all stress but zero stimulation

It's fucking slow. I left my last serving job because it was too slow. They keep telling me it's "just the slow season" but that's what they told me the entirety of my last job from summer to winter. I don't think you even have a busy season dudes. And if you do I don't want to see it because you're such a mess during "the slow season"

I am fighting for my life the past several days trying to request off one single day and the manager still hasn't gotten me the fucking physical paper form I need to request a day off. So, it's an archaic system just to request one day off and then you're just going to fucking ignore me and not even let me do it. I have a fucking life and you don't own me so that's not going to fucking work.

I'm already inclined toward nocturnal tendencies and this job has made it so much worse. Idk the last time I've been able to sleep before 4 am at the earliest. When I get home at 1-2 am every night I can't ever just fall asleep, I need to decompress which takes an hour or two at least. I want to be awake in the morning again

Plenty of others honestly. I just need to keep all this in mind tonight so I have the strength to quit

[flappingpussylips]

i'm gonna describe two different jobs and i'm gonna ask you guys to pick between them. no one can decide where my priorities lie, but i'd like to know what other people might do.

Profession #1: Pros: -pays extremely well -very good hours. A choose-your-own-hours type of job. Will never be anything but a 9-5. Three day weekend most of the time. Allows for getting paid full-time for working part-time hours. I could also bounce between companies and work for multiple companies. -once I get my license for this profession, it's incredibly easy to keep it renewed and so I could potentially have this career in my back pocket forever even if I take a 10 year break or something -can sit down whenever I need to Cons: -notoriously difficult schooling -extremely hard on the body; some people even start developing problems before they're done with training. Some people work out hard everyday to combat this; others pay physical therapists or chiropractors to help them. Basically everyone ends up with some sort of problem though. It's common for people in this profession to work only 5-15 years max in this career before they make bank and switch to something else -the work itself is extremely repetitive and never changes. Many people say they have to sing songs to themselves or daydream all day to stay sane. -almost no room for growth or climbing up the ladder. There's usually nothing new to learn and no promotions to be had. -it's client-facing and I'd have to do small talk all day every day

---------

Profession #2: Pros: -I'm much more genuinely interested in the actual day-to-day work in this profession than in profession #1 -I would never have to see or speak to a client/customer ever again in my life. I'd only have to worry about my coworkers/department. -the environment in general is highly appealing to me, from the types of people I'd be working with to the literal type of building I'd be in. -has lots of room for growth and learning. It's not too hard to take knowledge learned from this career and do bigger and better things with it. I'd always be learning something new -I get to experience helping people in my own way without ever speaking to or touching them Cons: -pays worse than profession #1 (like 1/3 less) -has terrible, long hours frequently. Like 12 hour shifts from midnight to noon is what I could potentially be working sometimes -would be constantly on my feet -this is a "behind the scenes" type of job and the efforts of people in this profession are often ignored or overlooked, despite being incredibly important. the kids next door will always get the pizza party -the workload is highly unpredictable

*if you read this whole thing I love you :) pls vote

[beepborpdoodledorp]

guild update first impressions

It’s bad.

It really, really pains me to say this considering I had shit on the Lvl 70 raise, Ascension, and the Disney update, and I seriously don’t want to keep continuously shitting on new updates, but I’d honestly say this one actually has the biggest problems out of all of them. 

I’m in a really inactive Guild, it’s the same one I’ve been in ever since I started playing. I’m essentially the only person who consistently tributes to it, with one other person sometimes popping up to help me clear off a chunk of the Guild Boss’s HP. I don’t think the Guild Officer has logged in for like 90-something days - the Leader’s better with log-ins, but I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen them contribute to the Guild Battle or the Museum. Point is, I’m basically carrying my entire Guild on my back, which was very doable not even 72 hours ago when the only Guild Boss was the dragon.

Problem #1: The drastic level curve. The new Red Velvet Dragon’s Lvl 1 variant is equivalent to its old late-20′s Lvls. That’s insane. Its late-20′s Lvls are usually the point where my Guild stops, and I’m still typically able to solo them, but this just means we need to put in more effort for less rewards. And it doesn’t help that we can basically only do 1/3 of the new bosses. Speaking of:

Problem #2: Who at Devsisters thought it was a good idea to add two extra Guild Bosses? When I saw the trailer, I thought it was a neat concept, but in actual gameplay it drags the entire mode down immensely. I can’t even solo the Lvl 1 variant of the Living Abyss, which is really bad when you’re basically one of the only people who actually decently contributes to Guild Battles in your Guild. And the goddamn Avatar of Destiny? Do I even need to start of that? It one-shot my entire party within ten seconds and I only managed to knock off five percent of its HP in one attempt. That’s just ludicrous.

Problem #3: This update was obviously geared towards Guilds that are high on the leaderboard. The problem is that only like 10% of the millions upon millions of people who play this game are in those top percentage Guilds. For the vast majority of the playerbase who are in relatively laid-back Guilds, this update is a nightmare. And, for some of my own context, just as an individual player - I’m not exactly F2P. I always buy the Season Passes, I’ll occasionally get some packages if they offer a good deal - though I’m not a whale, either, I use the shop very sparingly. I’ve been playing this game for about ten-ish months now, have about 15 or so Cookies maxed out (sans Ascension), have 100% completed Story Mode and well on the way to do so for Dark Mode. I’m very well off in this game, and these bosses are still a frustrating downgrade at best and near impossible at worst. And, unfortunately, ever since Chapter 2 of Cookie Odyssey came out, that’s been a theme - the battles in Cookie Odyssey gave us really stupid restrictions literally just after the Lvl 70 update, which resulted in me still having not beaten the Chapter yet. Then we have Master Mode, which for some reason decided to use the extremely poorly received restrictions from Odyssey, and that gave us people needing to look up guides on how to beat bloody 1-1. And now, there’s the Guild Update.

With all that being said, I still think CRK is a good game. In fact, it’s a great game. I’ve said it a million times, I adore CRK - I adore the characters, the mechanics, the story, how Devsisters managed to steer clear from a lot of pitfalls the gacha genre has that gives it such a (pretty rightfully deserved) miserable reputation. 

But it is pretty obvious Devsisters is hitting a slump right now. 

[atrophy-fathers-daughter]

Pet peeves about my roommate that literally make me consider ended it

1. Garbage in the sink I swear to fucking god who puts garbage into the sink? It makes me sick. Not only is it in the sink but it’s wet and mixed in with dirty dishes

2. She doesn’t do dishes. I went on a dish strike for 8 days where I did not go anywhere near the kitchen sink because it was so disgusting and she didn’t do dishes once, in EIGHT DAYS.

3. Dirty shoes in the house. Not just I need to grab something I forgot. Dirty shit covered shoes all through the house with no concern of cleaning up

4. Leaving the front door open. Why? Why can’t the door just be fucking closed? I have a cat and I’ve made it so abundantly clear that she can not go outside yet the door remains open every fucking day

5. Not cleaning. She does not clean whatsoever it’s disgusting

6. Complaining about her job. She doesn’t have a ‘real’ job she’s a farmer and I know farmers work they run the country but she literally doesn’t do anything she go outside for 4 hours max just to order other people around

6. Coming in my room uninvited. My room is my one place that I have control, the one place I keep clean. She comes in almost everyday to complain about her fake job and get my room disgusting. Sometimes she just comes in to shake off her dirty barn clothes and then leaves

7. Regularly leaving the stove on. Every other day I come home from work and the fucking stove is on. Is it so goddamn hard to have some fire safety

9 she’s a koreaboo. The absolute worst one I’ve ever seen. I enjoy kpop so I’ve seen saesangs and she’s worse

10. Having opinions like a white man. She’s so far right politically and it’s awful. Her opinions are the only ones that matter and if you disagree you’re wrong

11. Claiming to be asexual then telling me I’m her ‘lesbian pass’ and that I’m her lesbian. I am not a lesbian I’m an agender bisexual being constantly harassed

12. Not being okay with transgender. She has no idea I’m agender or Skye because I simply cannot deal with what would happen after that conversation. Her little brother is trans and as far as she’s concerned he’s dead to her.

13. Not believing in therapy. She’s a literal psychopath. I don’t say that lightly she has murder fantasies regularly and does kill animals‘ just because’ she once killed a cat who just had a kitten because she didn’t like it anymore.

14. Wishing her mom would kill herself because she finds her very annoying. Her mom is severely depressed and has been having an awful time since her accident which was tragic is all I’m going to say about it. She told me this proudly knowing I have tried to kill myself and have been hospitalized because of it.

15. Being against my consumption of recreational drugs. It is legal where I am to smoke weed which I do for medical reasons mostly sometimes I just feel like I need and that’s okay. I’m not an addict not that there is a problem with people who are it’s mostly just an occasional thing. I took up smoking darts because of her even though I do vape it wasn’t enough to deal with her which she is also aware is her doing.

16. Being so incredibly loud all the time. She has one volume and it’s screaming. Her voice is ruined because she’s never used an inside voice. Her hearing is gone because of her own yelling. And every time I’ve brought it up to be quiet she and I quote ‘that’s what you get for living with me’ getting a little excited is okay I get that but yelling at top volume from 8 am to 11 pm is just in called for

17. Treating me like I’m beneath her because she sublets to me. I’m less of a person because she rents out a room to me. Treating me like this is her apartment and I am an unwanted guest. I pay rent and a lot I might add to be in a single room not really allowed to do anything or use the living room. Because that’s hers and I can use it if I don’t change the tv or move anything.

18. Telling me to move out so she can turn my room into a ‘mannequin room’. If you didn’t think she was a psychopath before she wants a room dedicated to mannequins. Not to use just to have there because it would be better than having a human friend.

19. Not letting me have friends over because she doesn’t like them, yet inviting her friends over on a week night to be even louder because she doesn’t care that I have work in the morning

20. Making me take her places. She does not drive anywhere she has a license and car. She’s a terrible driver that shouldn’t be on the roads but that’s not why I have to drive. She just doesn’t like to and thinks is better that I’m a chauffeur. Never has she once paid for gas and I don’t know if you’ve noticed but gas is fucking expensive. Buying me a drink most times when we go out is good enough to her.

21. Hating my style. She hates on what I wear because I’m more punk/ getting into gothic even though her preferred fashion is tech wear which is also alternative fashion. She also hates the mohair I like even though I like kpop we don’t listen to the same groups and has to comment on how bad she thinks what I enjoy is

22. Constantly victimizing herself. She’s a bully and all around bad person who thinks every problem is about her. Her brother who’s trans said she makes him feel like killing himself and she thinks that just him trying to make her feel bad. She’s constantly fishing for compliments to make her self feel better like asking you to tell her she’s not terrible or stupid.

23. Not believing in therapy. She thinks therapy is a joke and seeing a therapist is stupid and makes you week. The only reason I have survived being around her is because I was in intensive therapy for years. The only thing keeping me together is working through my issues with a licensed professional but to be that’s just a joke and a waste of time.

I’ll probably have more but I think that’s all I can handle thinking about for now, thank you for coming to this long winded rant and I’m sorry this is on the Internet

[kaishun]

Xenoblade 3 Questing

I'm around 130 hours, and I think I've finished just about every sidequest? Only thing still pending is Info gathering on Aionios's dangerous monsters or whatever, and I don't think that even has a quest marker on it.

Most* colonies are at 5 stars or 4.9 stars after doing the quests, so just need to slap some more collectopedias at them.

There could also be a few quests that are level-locked? As my experience lands me around LV94, which is not LV99.

I'm not much of a Unique Monster hunter and I've only gotten 3 of the "Treasures of the Seven" or whatever items (the Attack, Agility, and Aggro ones) not sure if there's more? But I'll probably grab some guide for the Unique Monsters so I can plan a path accordingly.

That said, Xenoblade 3's side quests have felt good. Very involved, interesting, and impactful. My girlfriend complained about them being sidequests, even, as there's so much lore and character developed, giving them the extra polish of being voiced would've really helped. When your main complaint is "so good it deserved to be better", you know it's great!

However, since I'm wrapping things up now, the hours I put in are ending with it being much shorter than other Xenoblade games as far as my speed of questing-- I have well over 200 hours clocked on Xenoblade 2, and I'm still not done with all the side quests nor at max level. (I can't remember how far I got in Xenoblade 1. Playing it both for the Wii and Switch has muddled a lot of the quests for me. Don't think I hit max level though.) But Xenoblade 2's combat is... pretty painfully slow at times, so I'm not sure if that time stamp is a reflection of the actual amount of content.

My only real beef with the XB3 side quests outside of that was picking them up in the first place. The Info Gathering things are good in theory, but in practice they can be a bit awkward. They don't show up on the overworld map, and the characters often don't even exist (as little green dots) on the minimap. Just giving them a quest indicator would've helped a lot. I've even seen it take 2 in-game hours for two people to spawn in and start talking, pending on how the Switch is feeling about loading-- so even if I check every inch of a Colony, sometimes what I need is where I started searching, just it hadn't loaded in, yet. (And no, not a "time of day" sort of issue-- time of day seems a lot less important in XB3.)

Other minor complaints, the levels are also REALLY fucked up, like, prerequisite quests will sometimes have higher levels than their indirect follow-up quests, and it bounces up down and all around. It feels like at some point, they went back and rebalanced the quests levels to spread things out better, but didn't quite catch them all. The number of LV30-50 quests that send me to LV75 areas was rough. As I was doing this post-game, it was fine, just every once in awhile I'd run into a LV70 when I'm scaled down to LV50, or a LV30 when I'm sitting at LV70.

As a potentially game-breaking issue, there was also one quest (Side Story: Lanz I believe) that I was underprepared for, so tried to leave; but literally couldn't. I couldn't teleport, couldn't take the boat out, nothing. My quick saves were both on this quest, and my last manual save was over 6 hours previous. No way to abandon the quest, deactivating didn't do anything. There weren't really any enemies to grind on. I'm not sure if that happens on any other quests-- being locked into them like that-- as I didn't run into stuff "too hard, I'll come back later" very often. So I just had to slam my face into Consul H until she died, mostly via boring turtle method (I think 3 healers, 3 tanks, 1 attacker; I can't remember if I was able to bring a Hero to that fight).

*Colony Mu is weirdly behind on reputation-- more like 4.7? Which makes me wonder if the dangerous monsters info thing is for Colony Mu, especially since the Armu quest originally stated it could attract Rare monsters-- though after getting my golden boy, there's no more feeding to be done, so that feels like its done? Regardless, I'll need to shove my lil nose everywhere to find the remaining Infos for the Dangerous Monsters thing.

[elizabethsway]

This month has been fantastic. From game nights to language exchange meet ups, to church potlucks, to movie nights. I've been so busy.

A few years back I was praying for change, as scary as that can be at times, and I told God I felt like I didn't have a passion or hobbies. I had was in a new place, had not made friends close by and only got to talk to one of my friends regularly and virtually.

I desired to have both a community in Christ and with the world around me but felt lonely. I literally just slept, watched TV and worked.

Occasionally I went out and I found some trivia and gaming events around town. I had went to a gaming event in a public library. The one really cool thing about "nerds" especially the ones that love boardgames, is that they earnestly want others to like gaming too, so they upon first meeting you will find a way to give you a list of every gaming place they have ever been to a long with the time, address and their phone number in case you want someone to join you.

I found many board gamers and places to have fun for free around my city and through it have people that know me by name. I suppose Cheers had that right when the theme song sang:

Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name

And they're always glad you came

But when COVID hit, it didn't greatly change my life but I felt like all the progress I made putting myself out there and talking with strangers had gone to waste.

But in this time I did get really close with my long distance friends and we talked every week of not more.

As restrictions lifted, the gaming community was hurt a bit. Before COVID, a game night was light if 80 people showed up, not it's like a max of 30. In some ways this has been a blessing. I get to know people better and play often with them with less people around.

That's one thing that Facebook made me realize, that no matter how many people you connect with, if you try to invest in all of them, you will spread yourself too thin. Having a one or two really close friends is all you need, but it is nice to have those extended friends they even call up at a moment's notice and hang out with even if you're not super close to them.

As life went on, I can't tell you way but I woke up one day nd deciy Korean sounded pretty and I wanted to learn it. For a month I tried Duolingo and to be fair I still use it, though it's not best for Korean. So after a month I looked online and saw that a registration opened to take a class through their government. I signed up so last minute, four days before class.

It was a bit chaotic. Our teacher had been in SoKorea and he had emailed everyone registered that he would be doing a zoom class the first time and then we would be doing in person the rest of the semester. But I signed up about like 4 hours after he sent out that email so he didn't know I existed at the time. Luckily another student came in person as well because their email had went to spam. With their help I got the link and we were able to start our Korean journey.

Since then I've met so many other people. The place I take my classes sent out an email back in September about free Korean movies playing in theaters. I signed up for two of the films and after the first film they had a open discussion about the film. Someone mentioned the topic that I was interested in and I wanted to further talk with them after the movie but it was so dark I couldn't see who they were just that they were wearing a black jacket with a white shirt.

So I tried to hustle out of the theater and find the person. I found a guy that looked similar and asked him if he was the one to ask the question in the theater. He said no and I was mildly mortified, but then he started picking up on the conversation and we had a good 2 hour chat, before I found out that he's three levels ahead of me in the same place I was learning.

After that I invited him into my world of Gaming and he's been helping me out with learning Korean. We both ended up going to the language exchange class as well as some gaming events this month.

And while at the exchange class I met some ladies who invited me to their Church. I went there and they had a potluck this past weekend. A lady from Spain and a girl from Ukraine were both at the church.

I got to listen to their experiences and had very good conversations with them as well as other members of the church that were more permanent.

I feel like the more I put myself out there the more connections I'm making, which seems obvious but sometimes I can just feel hard to make that first step of getting out there.

I met so many wonderful people and had fantastic experiences this month. We're even going to do the Korean version of karaoke (노래방) soon and I just went out to eat after getting involved in a Korean Foodie Chat room.

It may seem tough but I encourage you all to get out there, find hobbies that interest you.

If you are not sure what you're passionate about or if you have any hobbies, try anything. At least you'll know if you like it or not once you've tried it, which can help you eliminate things you don't like. And along the way you might find people that have a common interest with you. And after more than not they'll help you find other people with similar interests.

[kwlascl]

Hp dmi tool 2016

#Hp dmi tool 2016 serial#

#Hp dmi tool 2016 Pc#

But if you're set on a Surface-style computer and are willing to deal with a finicky trackpad, the new Elite x2 is a solid, capable PC. The long train commute makes detachables difficult for me.

#Hp dmi tool 2016 Pc#

I hava a HP PC manufactured before Sep 2010 for sure but. Ireally really need this DMI Utility Tool for Desktops. Does anyone have the latest HP DMI Utility. (Or the storage.) You just need a Torx T5 screwdriver, a suction cup and some steady hands. I have Version 5.01 which I use on HP Desktop Motherboards all the time but it will only work on boards up to Sep 2010 after that it's a Newer Version. When that 3.5 to 4.5 hours of real-world battery life dips to 1 or 2 after a few years, you can actually open up the computer and replace the battery.You get a full-size USB 3.0 port for the thumbdrives and accessories you already own, instead of always needing to carry a dongle.We found the Spectre's spring-loaded, button-activated kickstand confusing and difficult to open with one hand.I found myself using the touchscreen for most of my scrolling.īy now you might be wondering: what about the consumer-oriented HP Spectre x2, which costs US$100 less for what appears to be the same machine? Personally, I'd pick the Elite every time. The pointer's accurate enough when it works, but sometimes it completely failed to detect my finger - or thought I was trying to pinch to zoom instead of scrolling up and down. While I'm actually a fan of the Elite x2's bundled, fabric-backed backlit keyboard (it's precise without seeming overly stiff), the touchpad is one of the most finicky units I've used in the past couple of years. It only feels marginally slower than the thinnest machines that sport beefier Core i5 processors, and our benchmarks agree. Though my configuration only had a lightweight Intel Core m5 chip inside, I didn't have any trouble running my usual mix of a dozen Chrome tabs, Slack, Evernote and Tweetdeck across three screens. What surprised me: the Elite x2 actually has enough muscle to make multiple screens viable. Plus, you'll need to pay HP an extra $50 (roughly £35 or AU$65) to add the WiGig feature required to make it work. While it allows you to literally walk up to your desk and watch your additional monitors magically spring to life as soon as you get close (the dock wirelessly pairs with the PC as soon as it's in range) I found it would sometimes forget to connect my Ethernet cable or mouse. I'd probably skip the most expensive dock, the HP Advanced Wireless Docking Station ($289 / £233 / AU$369), though. HP DMI Tool NBDmiFit BIOS Requests ONLY Hello, to unlock the mpm, you must take the FSMC.bin file located in the 'WNDMIFIT' folder, copy it to a fat32 formated usb key and rename it SMC.Look ma, no hands! GIF by Sean Hollister/CNET HP provides the DMIFIT and WNDMIFIT tools for re-flashing the DMI region: So i changed the policy dmi settings to: Hewlett-Packard,HP EliteBook 8470p DMISYSVENDORHewlett-Packard. Reason: The entry for the 8460p model look exactly the same.

#Hp dmi tool 2016 serial#

This application use to Update Hp Laptop and Desktop Machine Information like Serial number, SKU (Product Number), CT number, UUID and Build Version etc. Launch HP USB Disk Storage Format Tool by double-clicking HPUSBFW.EXE from within Windows. This is the solution for machine is not in committed state. The USB Drive should be automatically detected by HP USB Disk Storage Format Tool. If not, select the correct drive from the Device drop down list. Direct Media Interface (DMI) Revision 4.0 Max of DMI Lanes 8 Scalability 1S Only PCI Express Revision 5.0 and 4.0 PCI Express Configurations Up to. Failure to select the correct drive may result in data loss. HP Mobile Firmware Interface Tool (DMIFIT) - this tool, introduced in 2009, combines the previous consumer and commercial notebook DMI flashing tools (HPSetCfg and BrandIT) into one package. HPSetCFG and BrandIT are two older DMI flash tools that are no longer used with current HP notebooks: This combined package enables one version of the utility to support all consumer and commercial product families that shipped after 2C08. HPSetCfg - used for commercial notebooks. Windows DMI Firmware Interface Tool (WNDMIFIT) - HP business notebooks made after 2011 must use the WNDMIFIT tool to update DMI information.ĭMI Tools Version NbDmifit 1.14B DownloadĭMI Tools Version NbDmifit 1.14D Downloadġ. Goes to F10 -> System Configuration -> Boot options -> UEFI Boot Mode Extract Nbdmifit-V x.xx.rar to the root of the USB key formatted as FAT32.Ģ. > Press “Enter” to enable EFI boot -> Select “Accept” -> Save and exit.ģ. Press F9 then “External USB Hard Drive” -> Press enter to run startup.nshĬhose 1 to commit VPRO with AT, or 3 to commit Non-VPRO with ATĥ. Press 9 and then Enter key to lock descriptor and reboot the machine.Ħ. You should see the message “Pass!!! This machine is configured”ħ.

[girltomboy]

Omg my mom is unhinged again!!! My predictions never fail, she always gets like this after her sweet periods of time. Another fresh theory I have is that she gets more miserable when I have good days, so she's on the opposite side of the spectrum from where I am. It's so weird. I might observe it further. But onto what happened tonight. I was on my laptop at 11something pm. Playing a game by myself. She comes in and asks "you haven't gone to bed?" I'm like... no? Still early for me, don't even know why she would ask that. She told me it was snowing outside and I was like lol ok, and that was it. Later on, around midnight so not that much later on, but once I finished playing my game I went on discord so I can join my friends. I turned off the lights BECAUSE EVERYONE IS COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW HIGH THE ELECTRICITY BILLS ARE, and lit my nightstand candle that I got like 2 weeks ago and is still burning strong. Got in bed, ready to play. She comes in again and tells me to stop using candles, "that's how we're gonna burn, haven't you seen that case on TV?" (some woman left a candle burning and her apartment burned to the ground). I was like it's cool, I don't keep it on all night, plus it's in a glass and not a "pencil" type of candle. She literally would not listen to me, and I could hear it in her voice that she was being hostile. She kept saying "stop with the candles, just stop using candles". I told her well it's not good if I keep the light on either, so what then? She ignored it and called me stubborn because I was bringing arguments lol. And she said something like "if your stepdad hears that you use candles..." followed by something I couldn't hear because she had left my room and was too far for me to hear, plus my friends were talking on discord too so I couldn't hear properly. But that interaction fucking pissed me the fuck off, and planted in me the same feeling as when my grandma would come into my room to fuss over whatever she could find, then I would keep feeling irritated and frustrated obviously because I'm being taken for a fool, and anxious that she would come again and cause another scene or just not leave me alone. It took me a while to calm down from that tbh. And I don't intend to keep my mouth shut tomorrow if she brings it up again. Idc if she goes bonkers, don't treat me like a fucking child and especially don't try to dismiss me like I can't go nuts too.

[wecandoit]

These are the things I do when I’m utilising my time to the max. I’ll be 100% honest and say that I haven’t been doing these all the time recently, and as a result I’ve been having terrible time management. But at least that proves these tips work for me. I really do think that some of these will work for you too.

🍓Early starts: Note, this is more of a motivation thing rather than a productivity thing. Besides the generally having to wake up early for school/work, I recommend you get early starts even on your days off. Most people would say to wake up and be productive, but it’s totally fine to just lounge around and do nothing, especially when you don’t have major plans for the day. That’s the beauty of waking up early––you can have time for yourself and still get the day’s tasks done. Basically, you have more time to waste (honestly why am I even a studyblr?) Although, be warned, if you choose to lounge around, this could ruin your tone for the whole day. My advice would be to not go too hardcore on the  work as soon as you get up, but instead ease yourself into it slowly.

🍓 Hydration: You’ve probably had people drill this into you so many times but as soon as you wake up, drinking at least a full glass of water is essential. After a night’s sleep you’ve had a solid few hours (ideally) of absolutely no water, so you are super-dehydrated. I didn’t realise how thirsty I was in the morning but I started drinking one full glass every morning and it’s definitely refreshing as hell, and gets me in an altogether less drowsy mood

🍓Brush teeth: I hate morning breath and that gross taste in your mouth when you wake up. That is literally the only reason this is on the list. I feel so much more put together once I brush my teeth. Even after lunch or something, whenever your mouth tastes weird, just brush your teeth or even gargle some mouthwash or something. Nobody needs to be stuck at a desk smelling their own stinky mouth for hours on end.

🍓Apps: A lot of people use the 25:5 min Pomodoro timers but I personally like a larger work time frame so don’t really use them. I use 1Focus on my Macbook into which you can add in websites and apps that you want to block while you work. It works a treat, but be aware, you can’t turn it off, just in case you realise you’re going to need to open up a blocked app. [EDIT: I actually found a loophole to this so msg me if u wanna know] I also use Toggl or (recently) Yeolpumta which are more a motivational thing for me. These apps allows you to track your time throughout the day so you can see how much time you’re not utilising. With Yeolpumta you can also join lil study groups and if you’re competitive, use other people’s study times as your motivation. Also, you can find a lot of good compilations of useful apps on online servers or drives. (I’ll have links at the end of this post)

🍓 Study With Me: This one may not work for everyone but I discovered these worked SO WELL for me. Study with me videos can be found on Youtube and you can find a whole range of them, but I prefer the long 1-2 hour ones with breaks and no music. I watch the videos by @elloitsangela and sometimes @Merve on YT and they’re awesome. You can also find ones with background music if you prefer, but I like to listen to my own music or none at all.

🍓Motivation: Majorly links to the last point. I know I know I know that everyone has pretty much worked out that for long-term projects and goals, the key is to understand that staying on task is about discipline not motivation. But as much as you can tell yourself this, it’s almost impossible to stay disciplined when you have no motivation in you–– the two are intrinsically linked.The typical advice is to think of your goals, but motivation for everyone is different, and even really shallow points of motivation, like looking at pretty studyspo on Pinterest might give you that push, especially when you don’t know what exactly you’re working towards.

🍓 Music: While we’re on the topic of music, I think there are situations where music can be helpful and other times when it is just distracting. It really does depend on the work that you’re doing. Generally, people find it very hard to focus with music, when they’re working on understanding concepts, and coming up with logic-based ideas. Less mentally demanding and creative tasks tend to be completed more efficiently with music so if your priority is getting things done fast rather than comprehension, music is great. A cautionary note: I recommend you find songs that don’t make you want to stop what you’re doing and just bop along, as tempting as it can be. Classical, lo-fi, dubstep, EDM or jazz tends to work well for a lot of people.

🍓 Planning: I keep a bullet journal and use it to list out all the tasks I want to get done. However, this may be tedious for some. Alternatives you could use are just a simple notebook in which you jot down the days tasks. Or to-do lists work as well. Other people may find online planners or apps work better for them than physical methods and for those people, I will link a drive below for  nice compilation of management apps/sites. A tip for to-do lists is to break big tasks into small tasks and put them on ur list. This especially helps with mental health because big tasks can be overwhelming and you may feel you’re not getting anything done, even when you are.

🍓 Productive incentives: I try to make the way I reward myself as productive as possible by combining the reward with a chore. Lately I’ve been having to do a work around the house, so finding time to relax between studying and chores is hard. I’ve found that by doing my chores while watching a movie, or reading a book, or listening to music/podcasts, I can really utilise my time. That way, chores feel less like chores and more like time off. This is also useful because you feel like you’ve taken a break after doing your chores and can be motivated to get back to study/work.

🍓 Setting: This one is mainly in regard to temperature. Finding the optimal temperature, I’ve found, is pivotal to how productive I am. I usually struggle with focusing a lot when it’s too hot, because I work better at a cooler temperature (Australian summers hit hard). You may find it better to work in a hotter environment, though, and really it’s all down to experience. I suggest having a heater or cooler in the room, or if you work outside of home, find a place with the right heat. And I guess this is a given, but find a study space where you won’t be distracted by the people and things around you.

🍓Google drives (the holy grail): I kid you not, you can find literally any self-study resources on a google drive. Not only self-study but even useful links for time management, productivity, motivation, etc. I find these usually on tumblr, reddit, or from study groups. I’ll include a few resources and links at the end of this post and I’ll upload a separate post with more resources if you think it would be helpful.

🍓 Desk space: I will tell you right now that I cannot, for the life of me, clear my desk space up properly. Like, I just can’t. I always feel like I need my planner, my drink, my caddy, my entire pencil case, sticky notes, and a whole lot more on my desk with me. I know I don’t need any of these, but I can’t seem to put them away, probably because I always clear things away and ended up needing  to pull it back out. So what I do to clear my desk space is put away all my books that are from subjects I’m not focusing on. I don’t pack them away or anything, I just get them off my desk. Everything else stays on. Obviously if you can properly clear your desk space, you should do that. But if you’re like me, give this a shot.

🍓 Online study groups: This one is suited for a very specific type of learner, I think, so take it with a grain of salt. There are a whole lot of groups, whether it be a Tumblr chat, a Discord server, a Whatsapp group, that are made by lovely human beings who want to join forces in their work/study life. Finding one that really fits your interests and needs can be extremely helpful and motivational. The members in these group can give advice, keep you accountable and motivate and inspire you to work hard to reach your goals

This is my list so far. I’ve had this sitting in my drafts for a solid six months now so I’m well and truly sure they are my best tips. If you have anything else that you swear by, feel free to add on to this list in reblogs, or message me and I’ll edit the post myself. Obviously, different things work for different people, but as someone who gets really easily distracted and bored, these are all the things I can offer you.

These may be really obvious to some of you, but I also know that they’re not to everyone (because they weren’t to me), so please boost this post any way you can, I’d really appreciate it and I bet others will too :)

Some really helpful apps/links: • Yeolpumta for Apple or Android + an invite to my study group on Yeolpumta • 1Focus (I think this is only for Mac but not too sure) • Toggl Track for Apple or Android/PC • Z-lib in case you’ve been living under a rock: has almost every book ever published (including textbooks) • Project Gutenberg: more free ebooks • Openculture: a bunch of free audiobooks (and not just niche ones) • Librivox: more free audiobooks • PDF Library: literally a library PDFs (books, guides, articles, anything) • OEDb: find online courses in American colleges • Khan Academy: for help with literally any subject (I used it for maths and chem); also offers online courses • Wiley: find open access journal/research articles • Elsevier: more open access journal articles • Medical Study Zone: texts and resources for medical students • Megafolder of textbooks/resources for culture and language studies by @salvadorbonaparte (literally ilysm) • Memrise: language learning that’s not just duolingo • Books and resources about Medieval Europe • Gender/queer studies drive by @genderebels (ilysm) • Guide to learning how to code by @boomeyer • Recovering unsaved drafts from Microsoft Word • Writing essays with half the stress by @wittacism​ • List of words and synonyms to use in your writing so you can stop being basic • Massive list of literary techniques by @emmastudies​ • Masterpost of apps and extensions for productivity and self care by @mujistudies

(I’ve got a lot more links to drives for more university level textbooks, movies, animes, comics, music, etc. so if u need, hmu)

[softprincesso]

✨HOW TO BECOME A WEALTHY MIDDLE-AGED MAN✨

PT.2: Overview to understanding different saving/retirement methods, investments, and forms of income

2.1 Savings and Retirement

Welcome lovelies to (what I hope will be) a helpful series on gaining wealth and becoming financially literate and independent!

*disclaimer: while this advice can generally apply to many it will not apply to all. Everyone is in a different situation and should do their own research before they take what ANYONE says as fact or law. This is also coming from the perspective of a young, biracial, first generation female business student following a hypergamous lifestyle and who does sw so some advice may be specific to my like-minded ladies, but for the most part I just love money and want to help others find joy in their wallets as well. I am also operating in the US so things regarding accounts, stocks, and certain laws will vary by your country. Also, this is just a fun thing I wanted to do because talking about leveling up and learning and growing and money are my favorite past times. None of these pictures are mine, however I am using some links which may compensate me in some way, but I only used links which were mutually beneficial and would help you gain something as well, they are still just actual sources I use for myself.

✨THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND✨

Financial independence is different than financial confidence.

Financial Independence: “The most common sense of the term is that someone has enough wealth to live as they wish for the rest of their life without having to work.” -Investopedia https://www.investopedia.com/financial-edge/0611/declare-your-own-financial-independence-day.aspx

Financial Confidence: “We define financial confidence as having three aspects,” says Miler. “The first is awareness of how money can be a tool for helping you reach your goals and dreams. The second is financial literacy and understanding economic factors. The third is trust and knowing where to turn for financial advice.” -Forbes https://www.forbes.com/sites/shelleyzalis/2018/06/16/women-money-8-steps-for-growing-your-financial-confidence/?sh=2175b65e2468

While the ultimate goal is financial independence, financial confidence should be the main focus. I’ll give an example why. Imagine there are two people: Rhonda and Jill. Both of them like nice things, love to shop, and participate in the occasional splurge. Rhonda works a regular 9-5 and has a decent salary. She doesn’t have much financial knowledge (translation: financial confidence), but she has a savings account at her local bank and puts a couple hundred into retirement each year and she thinks that's enough. Suddenly, Rhonda wins the lottery. Overnight she has become a millionaire, so she quits her job, moves to LA, and goes on to live life to the fullest. She would now be considered financially independent. However, Rhonda has no idea how to manage all that money. She puts a small amount into that bank savings account and takes the rest to do what she will. One day she tries her luck at a casino, in less than five hours she has lost all of her money and has to start back at square one with no job, only a few thousand to get her through, and no-good way to explain to employers that she just wasted the last 5 years spending money on handbags she now has to sell at a depreciated value. (BTW you would not last not working with only a million dollars in LA for that long)

Now, let’s look at Jill. Jill is an independent contractor and has a relatively steady income. She knows very little about finances, but she actively learns how to manage what she has and keeps up to date on the latest money news. The day that Rhonda won the lottery was just another Thursday for Jill, the only unique point for her was that she opened a savings accounts with a high APY (we’ll say 1%) and put in $5000.00. A little later she also opened a Roth IRA and puts in the maximum yearly allowance of $6000.00. Along the way she opened a brokerage account of her own and started trading in the stock market along with investing in real estate which has given her some extra income to play with each year. Unfortunately, another housing crash occurs, and all of the money Jill invested into real estate is gone. However, since Jill learned the skills behind her choices early on, she is knowledgeable and understands the ups and downs of the market and how to invest her money in other places in the meantime. And, that High yield savings account accrued around $50 more without her doing anything and she has that to fall back on, or worst case she can take out part of her principal Roth IRA contribution. 10 years from now Jill should start to see a steady increase in her Roth IRA that by retirement will be a little over 1 million and she should be comfortable and invested enough into stocks that she gains around $200-1000 extra each month.

I think you understand why you want to be Jill.

✨HAVING ADEQUATE SAVINGS = BEING YOUR OWN LIFEGUARD✨

As discussed in Pt.1 the first goal you should achieve is securing an emergency fund that could sustain you for a couple of months if things were to ever hit the fan, and starting a retirement fund should be in your top 5 goals to complete. The saying, “the rich get richer” is popular for a reason. Wealthy people know how to make their money work for them instead of them having to work for money. An easy way anyone can do the same is by opening the right accounts for your savings and retirement.

Savings: 

All of your savings should be in a high yield saving account or split between different high yield accounts. This is an account which will reward you some interest every period for having money in your account with them. This is incredibly easy to do. You can either research/ask your bank about their high yield accounts or do some googling to find some other bank. Then transfer your money and there you go! When looking at banks understand that the highest Annual Percent Yields (APY), or the interest they will reward you, are going to be from online banks because they have less operational costs than a brick and mortar, but they will also come with their own disadvantages, like less ATMs to access or the inability to use when outside of your country so make sure to look into that. IMPORTANT: Make sure that whatever bank you choose is FDIC-insured so if the bank were to ever collapse or lose your money you have insurance up to $250,000.This won't generate a lot of extra cash, but an extra $20 every year is better than $0.

Retirement:

These accounts usually go by your current situation and what you see for your future.

401K: Probably the most known (I believe it’s only in the States but there might be something close to it in other countries) and that’s just because this is what employers usually offer if they offer anything. It is a retirement fund that your employer will set up and you can predefine how much of your paycheck you want to automatically go into it every time. Sometimes, the employers will also have a match program, and if they do you better max out the money they will contribute because that is FREE money! Most advice that I have seen has said to really only focus on this fund if your employer has that match program, otherwise I would focus on one of the accounts below. https://www.investopedia.com/articles/retirement/08/401k-info.asp

IRA: An IRA stands for Individual Retirement Account. There are three kinds…

                         Traditional: This IRA lets you put in pre-tax money and lets it grow tax-free until you make a withdrawal. Once you make the withdrawal that money is taxed at the current rate of your income at the time. Your contributions are tax deductible so you can write them off of your taxable income of that year. There are limits to how much you can contribute depending on your income, status, and whether you have another retirement fund as well.

                          Roth: With this IRA your contributions are taxed, but when you withdrawal money later on it is tax free. For those of you in a lower tax bracket than you believe you will be in the future, this IRA makes the most sense as you will pay less taxes now than you will when you are 59 ½ (The official age of retirement in the States). There are limits to how much you can contribute depending on your income, status, and whether you have another retirement fund as well.

                           SEP: Simplified Employee Pension. This is also an employer-based plan and may also work better for my self-employed gals out there. I don’t really know a lot on this one so I’ll just leave a link you can look into if it interests you: https://www.investopedia.com/ask/answers/102714/how-does-simplified-employee-pension-sep-ira-work.asp

You can have both a traditional and Roth IRA as long as you are eligible for both. Anyone with earned income (with a job or can prove a steady income) can contribute to a Traditional IRA, however with a Roth IRA, as a single you can earn up to $139,000 and contribute. Personally, if you are just getting started with all of this just set up one IRA and as you learn more you can take steps to get another or switch accounts.

https://www.investopedia.com/retirement/roth-vs-traditional-ira-which-is-right-for-you/

There are a plethora of other accounts, but they are more specialized and the top four should get you started on the right path to saving for retirement. I’m guessing that the majority of the audience reading these are women between the ages of 20-30. Trust me when I say that I love to spend money as much as the next girl, but I also would like to be completely comfortable should anything happen in my older years that screws up my marriage or job, and no one is going to secure that for you.

Also, I’m sorry this is so US-based, but once again it is all I know. I believe IRAs are more widespread than a 401K, but all that takes to find out is a Google search on your part.

Either way, make sure you have a plan going into 2021 for your savings and retirement because this economic whirlwind is far from over and there is always a chance for another recession, depression, or disaster. (Wow O, way to keep the mood light)

This was getting way too long with the investments added so look out for Pt.2.2 on the overview for investments (where the actual fun begins and I can stop being such a stick in the mud)…

VOCAB TO KNOW/RESEARCH:

Financial independence

Financial Confidence

APY

Roth IRA

brokerage account

High yield savings account

principal

401K

Traditional IRA

Once again… if in these posts I ever give bad advice, F- something up, or am just generally ignorant PLEASE call me out! Remember that just like you I am a young woman figuring everything out and while I am confident when talking about money, I am by no means a genius (only in spurts) so any chance to learn I appreciate. I hope you all learned something new today and as always…

With Love,

O

[heauxzenji]

How about an NSWF alphabet for Miya Osamu?

Hi Nonny! I hope you enjoy this- I know it was a long time coming but I had a lot of feelings and just wanted to make sure this was as perfect as could be 💖

NSFW Alphabet: Osamu Miya

gn!Reader focused

obvs nsfw under the cut... Let’s gooooo!

𝕬 - 𝕬𝖋𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖊

Ok, it’s not that you’re not going to get ANYTHING, but you’re not going to get a lot. He will definitely clean you up, hold you in his arms, and cover all the basics, but the man is also going to be napping so you have about 5 minutes of his absolute attention once you’re done. 

𝕭 - 𝕭𝖔𝖉𝖞 𝕻𝖆𝖗𝖙

Is an ass/thighs man at his simplest. Will 100% also do the “let me get past you” thing where he holds your hips as he moves. 

Your favorite feature of his is his back/shoulders. They’re so broad, and watching him flex his back muscles makes you clench. Also- your phone’s home screen is definitely a picture of his back riddled in your scratch marks.

𝕮 - 𝕮𝖚𝖒

Likes to do so on/in/around your mouth. He has an oral fixation, bonus points if you do too tbh. If he isn’t going to cum on your face, he’ll definitely cum inside of you instead, stuffing his fingers into your mouth so that you can suck them. 

𝕯 - 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕾𝖊𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖙

Would 10000% cuck his brother if given the opportunity. Just to see the color drain from his face. He’s kind of a shithead for that but at the same time, it’s not something he’s ever said out loud- so he’s chilling and just sitting on that.

𝕰 - 𝕰𝖝𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖈𝖊

He’s reserved, but I would say he has a decent amount of experience. He knows what to do, and he knows what he likes. I feel like he also is less experimental- preferring to stick to what he knows works for you both. He’ll try new things, but sparingly. 

𝕱 - 𝕱𝖆𝖛𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖊 𝕻𝖔𝖘𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

He likes to be ridden. He likes to have you on full display from all ends as you bounce on his cock. He can easily grip your waist and thrust you further down onto him, and loves watching you practically impale yourself on his length. Also likes to rub circles into your thighs or lower spread your asscheeks apart as he helps you keep a rhythm on his cock. 

𝕲 - 𝕲𝖔𝖔𝖋𝖞

He’s much more serious during, but afterward it’s very lighthearted. 

𝕳 - 𝕳𝖆𝖎𝖗

It’s neat. He doesn’t really trim much, but his hair isn’t super hard to manage, surprisingly. He’s not as hairy around his chest/torso either, but he does have a happy trail that he shaves fairly often, even though you think it would be nicer if he didn’t. 

𝕴 - 𝕴𝖓𝖙𝖎𝖒𝖆𝖈𝖞

He’s not conventionally romantic, but he does savor the moment with you. He likes to gaze into your eyes while he’s taking you, and will place soft kisses to your hairline and jaw when he’s getting close to finishing. 

Will murmur that you’re wonderful/amazing/beautiful, or whatever compliment comes to mind first when he’s finished with you and ready for his cuddles

𝕵 - 𝕵𝖆𝖈𝖐 𝕺𝖋𝖋

He doesn’t much- honestly the frequency varies depending on his stress levels. When he does though, he’s the classic shower jerk off guy. It’s cleaner and honestly a lot quicker for him to finish that way. Definitely will be more aggressive when he’s more stressed as well, whether you’re there or not. He is a fan of mutual masturbation as foreplay. 

𝕶 - 𝕶𝖎𝖓𝖐

MARKING, loves leaving hickeys and bruises. He doesn’t care if anyone can see them, or how many you have by the time it’s over. He gets so entranced that he doesn’t realize how many he leaves behind Biting goes hand in hand with the marking- definitely has an oral fixation. 

Size, bc he’s so broad. He likes the feeling of being bigger than you because he feels like he’s your protector- but he also likes the feeling of stuffing your much tinier frame so full of his cock that you go stupid.

Dirty Talk, not super degrading dirty talk, but things like calling you “dirty” or “messy”- and especially “sloppy” really get him going. He also just likes to hear you beg for him, so he’ll egg you on and ask you if you like how deep he’s fucking you or if your tiny little hole can fit all of his cock inside. Again, size kink, so he loves calling you little/tiny. 

Temperature Play, specifically with the cold. Will eat ice prior to going down on you, or change the blistering hot water to icy cold when you’re having sex in the shower, just to see the shock on your face at the difference in sensation 

Sensory Deprivation, blindfolds? He said say less. He likes watching you writhe in anticipation as you feel him ghost touches and kisses all over your body. And it also drives you crazy waiting for him to strike- it usually leaves you begging for him to touch him. 

𝕷 - 𝕷𝖔𝖈𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

Primarily bedroom only, but he has been known to have quickies in the restaurant with you after closing, and also loves getting road head. 

𝕸 - 𝕸𝖔𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

Osamu likes to hear you. Likes to know what he’s making you feel good, and the moans you make encourage him to keep going. Definitely also motivated by begging. He’s a little smug, so it inflates his ego that you’re begging him to tear you apart- it’s the feeling of knowing that his cock makes you absolutely drunk and you’ll do anything for it. 

𝕹 - 𝕹𝖔!

I don’t think he’s into food play! Not that he would NEVER do it, but it’s really not something he’s super into. Food is kind of his art form if that makes sense… it’s also work and he definitely seems like the type to try and keep his work separate from his personal life to an extent . But you have fucked in the restaurant at closing too many times to count.

𝕺 - 𝕺𝖗𝖆𝖑

He’s very good with his mouth. He has an oral fixation so this comes naturally. He could go down on you forever if you let him, and he won’t stop even if his jaw locks up. If you’re going down on him, sometimes he will get a little ahead of himself and fuck your face just a little. Most of the time he catches himself and will apologize for not warning you first… most of the time. 

𝕻 - 𝕻𝖆𝖈𝖊

It differs! He personally loves the buildup of having a slow burning session, but there are times- especially when he’s frustrated, where he can just take it out on you. And when he does need you for stress relief, you should go ahead and cancel any plans you have for the next 2 days or so, because you’re not going to make it. 

𝕼 - 𝕼𝖚𝖎𝖈𝖐𝖎𝖊

He’s not fond of them, but he’s also not against them. For him, he’d rather use them as foreplay, or something to hold you both over until you’re alone and he can really have you the way he wants you.

𝕽 - 𝕽𝖎𝖘𝖐

Is into semi-public sex for sure. Things where he knows you won’t possibly get caught- but there’s that inkling of a chance that you could get caught are his favorite. He’ll also give in if you just can’t wait… but he really tries to restrain himself. It’s a little bit less so when he’s been drinking though- he’s much more likely to let you escalate things and will probably go as far as some clothed sex with you if it’s dark/crowded enough that no one will notice or see 

𝕾 - 𝕾𝖙𝖆𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖆

Can go about 2 rounds max in a day,  but they’re long... When he says he wants to spend the day in bed, he means the whole day. Everything he does is about the sensuality of it all. He loves foreplay, it’s the perfect warmup to the main event for him. The main event itself... can go for hours tbh. He’s literally a slow burn loving bitch, but when you beg for him, he’ll waste no time absolutely destroying your walls. Needs a longer break in between rounds for snacks so he can keep his energy up. 

𝕿 - 𝕿𝖔𝖞

Not too fond of them. Prefers to get you off using his own body. But he’s not against things like silks to use as restraints, and he does own a flogger that he likes to drag along your body when you’re blindfolded. 

𝖀 - 𝖀𝖓𝖋𝖆𝖎𝖗

Osamu himself IS the tease. He’s always so calm and collected, even when you’re all over him, begging for him to bend you over and wreck you. It’s that calm and control in itself that’s a tease because you know that once he gives in, you and your insides are done for.

𝖁 - 𝖁𝖔𝖑𝖚𝖒𝖊

Not loud, but not quiet either. His voice literally goes an octave lower which is insane. He holds back his moans in the beginning, instead he pushes air out of his mouth and takes more sharp, hissing inhales. But when he’s close he’ll lean into your ear to spew absolute filth into it so that he can feel you clench around his cock and send him over the edge 

𝖂 - 𝖂𝖎𝖑𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖉

He has an Onlyfans but he makes sure his face is never in the camera. Camboy!Osamu is literally in their top 8% of creators and no one knows about it because he’s just that good at flying under the radar... but hey, that’s how he was able to afford the restaurant- so now he slings dick and onigiri. Win-Win. 

𝖃 - 𝖃-𝕽𝖆𝖞

Isn’t as thick as Atsumu, but he is more veiny and honestly all around prettier. His dick is probably also a good 7 inches, but I feel like he’s a grower, so you’d be surprised at how much he’s really working with. He has a freckle on the shaft, which is very adorable and endearing. He has a pretty dick. Like, aesthetically beautiful... it’s much prettier than Atsumu’s- much neater/more cleaned up too.

𝖄 - 𝖄𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌

Never lets on just how much he wants you. He would rather have you come to him instead so he doesn’t look needy. But he wants to be balls deep in you practically all the time. He just is very prideful, so he’s going to wait for you to come to him- which… tbh you always do.

𝖅 - 𝖅𝖟𝖟

Yeah, you have about 5 minutes after he cums to get anything out of him- bc he’s taking his ass to sleep. But that’s an advantage For you because he’s kinda delirious and will say yes to anything you ask him for… Is also a clingy sleeper so would definitely hold onto you and make you his little spoon.

Taglist Starseeds (check ur privacy settings if your url is in bold): @super-noya @crushzone @yumekosgamblingroom @boujiesav @onesingleravioli @ushijimasfarmhat @trouvelle @nekoma-hoe @right-shoe-jpg @makemealive @ukaic @nivky0-0 @animoozies @charmarsmith

[karahalloway]

WIP Wednesday - 01.12.2021

Since it’s Wednesday, I’ve decided to share a snippet of two new WIPs I’m working. Snippets below the cut (first snippet is PG, second snippet is M for swearing and angst).

Chapter 2 of Sleepless in New York

😱😱😱OMG! I know! I’m finally writing the next chapter! (*shock and fainting all around*). I know I have been seriously neglecting this series and I know a lot of you have been eagerly waiting for this next instalment 😅 Happy reading!

Shrugging out of my jacket, I quickly roll my sleeves up, and muss my hair a bit.

First impressions were important. And since I was no longer in the well-heeled Uptown, I needed to tone my appearance down a bit, so I didn't stick out like a sore thumb. Not that I was worried about getting mugged or anything. I could hold my own if I had to. But it was always better to make the effort to blend in than to draw unnecessary attention to yourself.

Slinging the blazer over a shoulder, I grasp the slightly sticky door handle. Pulling the door open, I step into the bar.

The smell of grease and beer hits me as I survey the room, and I feel my stomach growl in anticipation. I hope this place did cheeseburgers. It's been ages since I've had a decent one. And no place does cheeseburgers like the States.

Since it's still relatively early – barely gone 8pm – the tables are about half occupied and there are a couple of guys at the bar. The clientele was definitely more on the blue-collar end of the spectrum. But that didn't bother me. If anything, it was a welcome change from being surrounded by entitled aristos all the time.

It was the main reason I sought out places like this. They were the perfect antithesis to the over-varnished bubble the nobility liked to insulate themselves in. They also served as a reminder my humble, commoner roots (not that the aristos ever really let me forget them) and gave me the opportunity to simply be – myself, by myself. Just another guy in a dingy bar enjoying a much-needed drink after a shit day.

"Bar or table?"

Oooh...! Who could that be...? You’ll find out when I post the rest (hopefully sometime next week)! Can’t give it all away, can I? Muhahaha! 😈

New Bonus Chapter for (Un)Common Attraction

A while back, I received an Anon ask to write a Drake POV chapter covering his thoughts and reactions to Chapter 21 - Dive Into the Deep End. While I have had the content of the chapter in my head for a while, I have finally started writing it down (this snippet is literally where I’ve gotten to so far).

I'm an idiot.

A fuckin' world-class idiot.

What — in the name of sweet, motherfuckin' Jesus! — had possessed me to fuck off with her fuckin' bikini top?

I hadn't even had anything to drink!

No. Wait. I'd had that glass of Eagle Rare on Hana's yacht.

But that had been like a finger and a half. Max. With food. Almost three hours prior.

No way had my judgement been impaired.

It normally took at least three good-sized shots for me to even start feeling buzzed... And lit enough to even consider pulling some stupid shit like that? Half the bottle. Minimum.

So it hadn't been the whiskey.

"Fuck..." I groan, dropping my head onto my crossed arms on the bar top.

I wish it had been the whiskey... Because that least that way I could pass on some of the blame for the epic clusterfuck I’d just created.

As you can see, a WIP for Part 3 of my Thanksgiving standalone one-shot (which has now turned into a mini series) is conspicuously missing from this line-up. This is because I want to refocus my attention on my main series ((Less Than) Noble Intentions and Sleepless in New York) over the next few weeks. I am planning to write Part 3 at some point (no timeline at this stage), but will post a WIP when I do!

Permatags (let me know if you want to be added!)

@twinkleallnight @lovingchoices14 @petiteboheme @aussiegurl1234 @queen-arabella-of-cordonia @tessa-liam @alyshak92 @secretaryunpaid @princessleac1 @walkerdrakewalker @fictionloveevie @angelasscribbles @drakewalkerisreal @nestledonthaveone @tinkie1973 @lunaseasblog @indiana-jr @twinkle-320 @knaussal @choicesficwriterscreations @differenttyphoonwerewolf @texaskitten30 @kingliam2019 @pinklipsandmasonjars @sillydg @spookycolorpeanut @peonierose @mrsnazariowritesagain @shellybee85 @3pawandme​ @honey358luv

Sleepless in New York Only (let me know if you want to be added!)

@bebepac​ @lilacsandwhiskey​

[pallasperilous]

Boneless Wings

 {AO3 version}

So, blah blah blah, it’s their standard-issue disaster: pack of dumbass witches (always with the dumbass witches. Where do they find the time for this shit? Somebody get these women signed up for a Peloton subscription or a macramé class or a vibrator of the month club, seriously, whatever it takes—), ancient curse, Castiel being the actual angel of stepping in it, nobody cares. 

The point is, two hundred and forty-one hours of binge-worthy drama later, Dean and Cas are living in a semi-detached just a short thirty-minute commute to somewhere equally lame, Castiel has two literal-ass wings, and yes, Susan, they kiss now. 

The neighbors are weirdly cool with it. 

For those of you perving along at home, Dean could absolutely provide a list of the hundred or so ways that having a boyfriend* with giant fucking actual wings is super hot and/or awesome.

This is not that list.

(*you can just shut right the fuck up , Sam, because it’s either this or Dean will start saying lover. And nobody needs that. Nobody wants that.)

1.  Bird mites. Holy shit. 

 2.  Sharing a bathroom. The shower curtain rod, and consequently the security deposit, are early casualties. The medicine cabinet follows swiftly behind. Shower hijinks are not even an option.

 3.  Dean comes home one day from a gig and there is a giant plastic green turtle in the backyard. A closer inspection reveals that the turtle is actually a mule for about half a truck bed of industrial dust ‘n grit. It is, in fact, a kiddie sandbox. Dean points out that they do not, in fact, have a small child (FINGERS CROSSED), so...?

Cas then earnestly shows him an entire playlist of exotic birdy dust bath videos on Youtube. 

Dean then earnestly shows him the garden hose. 

4.  The down just gets, like...everywhere. EVERYWHERE. How many times have Sam and Dean practically sold their kidneys for a single angel feather for some dumb spell to solve some pointless Occult McProblem? And now Dean is picking them out of his damn teeth every morning. (No, gross, not because of... Jesus, no, that is not a thing.)

On the upside of this one, Dean finally has an excuse to buy a Dyson, which he’s secretly always thought looked awesome. It is. 

 5.  When Dean is scraping out the umpteenth canister of fluff he jokingly suggests they use some of it to supplement the tragically flaccid down comforter currently shaming their bed, and Castiel pitches an existential fucking sulk. Dean wants to experience happiness again, so he does not point out that it get ass-bitingly cold here this time of year, and decent bedding is not exactly inexpensive, and the Dyson kind of maxed them out on household purchases.

But whatever.

 6.  Castiel is indulging in what Dean thinks of as a sky pout when he flies right into a head-on with li’l Timmy NextDoor’s new Christmas surveillance drone. It dings the shit out of one of Cas’s left primary feathers (the scientific term is “those big motherfuckers”), which apparently hurts like a bitch. Cas is grounded for a few weeks after that and is cutely pathetic about it and at first Dean is absolutely down to kiss it better. By the end, Dean is almost ready to strangle Cas with his own necktie, but he has learned a lot of surprisingly interesting stuff about ancient Mesopotamia, like that it was super horny.

 7.  After the snow melts, Dean starts finding shit on the front step with the morning paper. It’s not even a good newspaper; Cas signed them up for the local fish-wrapper (or maybe it was Sam, before he fled for the hills— he occasionally breaks out in a  “support local journalism” rash). The crossword puzzle is insulting, but the paper does at least syndicate Carolyn Hax, whom Dean secretly suspects of being an absolute wildcat in the sack, so he grudgingly expends the calories to bring it in every morning. 

Anyway, at first the stuff he discovers crapping up the welcome mat is just shiny bits of trash — couple granola wrappers, some MGD pull-tabs, a few field-stripped twisty-ties. Probably just windblown, and he tosses it in the garbage can. 

Then a couple weeks in, things start getting...grisly? It escalates real slowly, from a variety platter of mouse bits to squirrel à la power line and then half of a dry-aged raccoon and an opossum that has recently graduated from playing dead to professional dead-being. The neighborhood crows obviously love that their front step is now a roadkill café; Dean has to bat increasing numbers of them away with the kitchen broom in order to relocate their horrible snack to the edge of the nearest storm drain.

Then one morning there are like twenty crows and they’re in just the cutest little football huddle-up around what turns out to be a human fucking finger with a retro-fun mood ring still on the knuckle (it’s feeling: Sad) and Dean fully loses his shit. 

Cas hears him freaking out and comes whomping out of the garage ready to, whatever, flap somebody to death maybe, but as soon as he establishes that Dean doesn’t need anything more than a fresh pair of boxers, he de-poofs a bit and assesses the whole human finger/crows situation in his usual infuriatingly unrushed way. The crows had mostly bounced up to the cable line over the house, safely out of brooming range, but one by one they start to drop down and hippity-hop back towards the world’s tiniest crime scene.

If Dean were five percent less freaked he’d be tempted to go inside and find out how much of a dent he can make in a six-pack before Castiel finally dings and spits out his results, but he isn’t, so he just stands there in silence clutching the broom like it’s a shotgun.

Eventually Cas says “hm,” and then he looks at the crows and makes some noises that sound like a spoon caught in a garbage disposal, and the crows make some scrawps and chuks back, and then one of them delicately noodges the tip of dead finger with its beak and then hippity hops back a foot or two, bows, and then they all fly away over the shitty little beige duplex across the street like they’re running ten minutes late to an important bird appointment.

Castiel stands up (Dean reflexively backs up into the doorway, as this involves Cas bomfing out his wings a bit for ballast and Dean has caught a blow to the nuts on more than one occasion), dusts off his goddamn slacks, pulls a plastic evidence baggie out of thin goddamn air or maybe his socks, and casually bags the finger like they’re doing a standard FBI wheeze. “So what,” Dean says, as Cas diligently zips the baggie, “the fuck?”

“Oh,” Cas says, blinking in surprise that Dean is still there and interested, “they think I’m their god.”

Dean kind of stares back at him, the six feet of dude and like sixteen feet of bird, and thinks sure, okay, but his face must still be stuck on “Tippi Hedren attic scene” because Cas puts a reassuring hand on Dean’s shoulder and adds “Don’t worry. I’ve told them I don’t require further offerings, and I reassured them that you’re my consort and were simply jealous of other potential mates.”

It takes Dean two weeks to come up with a response to that, but by then it’s become evident that no bird is ever going to shit on the Impala again, so he decides to just chalk it up in the win column and move on.

You know. The family business.

8.  No matter how tightly he folds them, Cas can’t fit his wings through the definitely-not-up-to-code doorway of the wood-paneled family rec room in the basement, so Dean claims it as his man cave and dubs it the “No Fly Zone.” 

Castiel doesn’t find this funny, but Dean really only uses it to fold laundry. 

 9.  Transpo is an obvious issue. Cas can almost stuff himself into the Impala if he sort of reverse-cowgirls the back seat, but then the wingtips smoosh up against the windshield and Dean’s visibility is approximately zip. And, sure, Cas could fly himself anywhere they really needed to go, he’s basically a Chevy Of The Air, but sometimes it’s raining, and the seraph Castiel — Shield of God, Heavenly Soldier of the Lord, multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent, will smell like a wet fucking chicken for days afterward. Febreze does not help.

Dean spends a few nauseating weeks contemplating the purchase of — and here he learns that the human gag reflex can be conditioned, but never truly eradicated — a convertible. Once Cas brings up the possibility of a minivan or perhaps a station wagon (he’s taken to studying family motor vehicles with all the intensity of a birder with a life list) and Dean makes him sleep on the couch.

Dean gets his own living room rotation after he shows Cas a Craigslist posting for a very reasonably priced horse trailer. Castiel points out that it’s used and Dean notes that neither of them is exactly mint in original packaging either. Castiel points out that he’s not a horse, and after a few necessary but admittedly unoriginal jokes, Dean pulls up a website with an exhaustive photographic tutorial on how to convert a horse trailer “for the safe and sanitary transport of ostriches, emus, and/or cassowaries.” Cas points out that he’s not an ostrich, emu, and/or cassowary, and Dean counters that he clearly isn’t, because an emu would probably show a little more gratitude, and that’s how Dean learns that the couch has a broken spring under the left cushion. The transpo issue remains unresolved.

 10.  Dean keeps a pair of shop-grade safety goggles by his side of the bed. It’s not the sexiest look, but it turns out feathers are stabby as hell when encountered at a particular angle. Cas can do the healy thing, of course, but they learn the hard way that cornea perforation is not really a mood enhancer. On the bright side, Castiel accidentally corrects Dean’s incipient presbyopia, which means Dean doesn’t have to hold the newspaper at arm’s length anymore when he’s idly speculating what Carolyn Hax looks like below the neck. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.

 11.  You’d think that, when you’re coming down from a time-limited but incurable curse that makes you feel like every cell of your body has its own cute little individual headcold — because you missed a hex bag due to the fact that you were preparing your legal response to Sam turning up to the hunt wearing a goddamn hair scrunchy, as if he were fresh off the set of a very special episode of Clarissa Explains It All — anyway, you’d think that being wrapped in the warm embrace of an angel’s wings would be nice. 

But you would be wrong, because apparently your boyfriend has been out communing with the bees again, and those feathers pick up ragweed pollen like it’s their goddamn job, and guess what else angels can’t cure? Dean will take Motherfucking Seasonal Allergies for 600, Alex. 

12a.  One of the neighbors has that homesteading hippie brain disease that drives an otherwise normal-seeming person to brew their own beer and raise a bunch of chickens despite living within five hundred yards of a fully functioning Hy-Vee. There’s a week where one of the wee little velociraptors seems to be processing some kind of trauma because it starts yelling at dawn and keeps going until well past the hour that swearing is allowed on network TV. 

When Dean finally hammers on the front door the next afternoon the neighbor apologizes with some extremely nasty home-brew (HIPPIES) and some absolutely devastating weed (HIPPIES!) and explains that “Ginger is going through a rough molt” and then he kind of nods his head towards Dean’s side of the fence where Cas is futzing around in the squash plants and stage whispers (this is a direct quote) “You know how they get.”

Dean is about to rip the dude a new one for comparing his immortal space-kaiju lover to a fucking Australorp yard pullet when Castiel pops his head up over the white pickets and breezily contributes “Bad molt, yes, those are terrible, Dean can tell you all about how insufferable I am those weeks,” and sometimes Dean just doesn’t know why he even tries.

 12b.  The less said about angel molt, the better. 

Seriously, the freakin’ eyes-on-his-hands naked mole rat dude from, whatsit, Pan’s Labyrinth of Subtitles, would run screaming from this shit. 

 13.  There’s a 4th of July BBQ Potluck Block Party and Dean’s inability to stand idly by while good meat is abused ( shut up Sam ) means he winds up manning the grill and dismissing the pretenders to set some strictly inedible things on fire. Cas hangs out next to him and uses his flappers to kinda whupf the smoke away from Dean’s eyes now and then, which rules. It’s actually a pretty chill event until Sharon and Don From Number 4267, The Green House With The White Trim, turn up with a giant Pyrex full of naked, still-marinating teriyaki wings. 

Sharon And Don look down at their wings and then up at Castiel and then down at the wings and then up at Castiel and they are clearly teetering on the edge of a Midwestern politeness failure-based nervous breakdown. But then Cas, smooth as a margarine commercial, gently takes the dish from Sharon’s frozen hands, examines the contents for a silent moment, and says “it’s alright. They weren’t personal friends.”

He gets an extra burger for that one.

 14.  Cas keeps absent-mindedly trying to groom Dean — who, in case it still needs to be said at this point, possesses zero-point-zero feathers of his own — so he goes after Dean’s hair, instead. Dean has to stop him after his second hour of trying to straighten out a cowlick. “I don’t understand how you can steer properly with this deformity,” Cas says, as if it’s a genuine miracle that Dean isn’t constantly careening over ottomans like Dick Van Dyke. He’s even more horrified by Dean’s (frankly minimal) use of hair gel. “Jesus, Cas, it’s not like I’m drinking it,” he says, but then one time they have an epic make-out session shortly after Dean performs his masculine beauty rituals and there’s some smearage of various types of Product (tm) on the flappy areas. 

And, sonuvabitch, for the next six hours Cas is spirographing around the house like he has a heavenly inner ear infection, and he only stops veering into the doorframes after Dean wipes down every. Single. Feather. With mineral oil and about eighteen clean shop cloths. Dean switches to something called hair wax, which costs thirty zillion times more per ounce and makes him smell vaguely like church, but is a lot less gloppy. The things we do for love.

 15.  Seating inside the house is a bit of a conundrum, too. Cas can kind of flop his wings out to the sides if he sits in the middle of the couch, but then Dean’s stuck on the recliner, which is basically in the next county. Bar stools are disastrously tippy, Dean’s lower back and hips have not endured mumble-mumble years of hunting just to be subjected to a damn beanbag chair, and, after a brief flurry of optimistic excitement, Dean determines that they’d have to take the front door off to get a massage chair in. He finds a swing online that if, he can get the hardware properly installed in the crossbeam, is rated for up to 500 pounds, so he texts Cas the URL so he can check out the specs. After half an hour he writes back —

CASTIEL: Dean

CASTIEL: I believe this swing is intended for sexual congress.

DEAN: ...

CASTIEL: I can infer from the ellipsis that you have spent several minutes attempting to draft a response.

DEAN: ...

CASTIEL: Dean

DEAN: it’s multipurpose

  16 . On the plus side, though, big-ass wings make for a pretty good drying rack. He can get every sock in the house laid out on those suckers in a single round and, one episode of Dr. Sexy later, they’re perfectly dry and toasty warm, without any of the pair-busting casualties Dean has learned to expect from the apparently socknivorous dryer in the basement. 

Dean assumes it’s just the product of good air circulation and body heat until he realizes that he hasn’t had to toss a pair for being too worn out in...maybe six months? So he asks Cas “Are your wings... healing the socks” and after an entire Abbott and Costello routine centering around heal versus heel, Dean determines that the answer is: yes, his boyfriend’s wings are channeling the almighty power of Heaven to magically repair the socks Dean buys at Target in twelve-pack bags. On sale.

This is actually kind of sexy, if Dean is being perfectly honest, so, you know what? It doesn’t belong on this list.

 16.  So nobody really freaks out or bursts into tears or calls the news or the FBI or anything when Cas goes out in public with him, which Dean is secretly a little disappointed about, because come on. (Maybe giant wings just reads as a gay thing? Was there an episode of Will and Grace about this that Dean missed back when he was ass deep in wendigos or something?)

But no. Dudes tend to just glance at them across the Home Depot parking lot, throw them the Mutual Dude Acknowledgement Nod, and say some shit like “Comic-con,” or “nice anime” in a knowing tone. Then they go back to rolling their carts full of gaskets or hammers or whatever back to their mom’s station wagon. 

Little girls tend to go googly-eyed — Castiel seems to fall into the same category as a Disney princess, despite the stubble and the drabcore wardrobe, and Dean can’t count the number of times some mom has approached Dean at the grocery store (like he’s Castiel’s manager?? Which, okay...yeah, actually) and asked if they do birthday parties. The money would actually be pretty tempting if Dean weren’t five thousand percent sure that Cas would get them both arrested by launching into an anatomy lesson about duck sex or how God is a loser who favors relaxed fit jeans and Wild Turkey.

The worst is white ladies of a Certain Age, and it always seems to happen in the pudding aisle, for some reason. They either go cross-eyed with horniness and become indiscriminately handsy (Dean can’t blame them for the impulse, but also back off, Karen), or ask Cas for prayers for their cat’s chronic asshole problems (which Castiel WILL take seriously). 

Worst of all is when some hippie spinster clocks them. This woman inevitably reaches right for the feathers and asks in a willowy voice if they’d ever consider turning some of them into dreamcatchers to sell at her studio, which is literally always named The Faerie’s Glen. Then Cas gets confused about why, exactly, a sixty year-old WASP in a peasant skirt would need to call on the infant-protection powers of an Ojibwe spider goddess, while Dean just wants to bite the lady’s fingers off. 

Either way, it’s always a bad scene, and many fully loaded grocery carts have been lost to the fallout.

17.  For some metaphysical reason Dean is too dumb to suss out but also too smart to question, lugging a pair of Cessna-sized flappers around this mortal dimension actually seems to tucker Cas out. He doesn’t need to zonk out every night, but he semi-regularly throws in the towel and actually crawls in with Dean for the duration. 

This would be swell in theory, but the guy absolutely cannot settle the fuck down in less than three (3) human hours, which is the exact amount of sleep Dean requires to maintain his famously sunny demeanor. It’s not just ye olde tossing and turning — Dean can handle that, sharing a bed with Sam is like sleeping next to a kangaroo with restless leg syndrome — no, it’s a nonstop parade of little flippy-flappies and shiffle-shuffles and spontaneous outbursts of preening. 

So Dean makes him a Baby Sleep Sack. 

This is something Dean knows about due solely to one super dumb hunt involving a banishing sigil that had to be drawn in — he still feels like this had to be a misprint — human breastmilk, and that was obviously not happening. But the monster of the week wasn’t going to banish itself, so they wound up at the nearest Walmart, at 4am, picking up what turned about to be an unnecessarily generous supply of baby formula, along with a fresh box of shotgun shells because God bless America*. It doesn’t work, although “lots of stabbing” turns out to be a solid fallback plan, but the point is that while Sam was debating between Digestion Support or Neurological Development, Dean acquired an unprecedented familiarity with some of the products currently available to the sleep-deprived parent. So Dean finds some DIY Baby Sleep Sack knockoff patterns online and determines he can replicate and scale up the concept with some beach towels and duct tape, and the next morning he presents the lumpy but totally functional prototype to Castiel. 

Initially Cas thinks it’s a sex thing (reasonable, it probably is), but once they clear up that misunderstanding, he’s obviously a little peeved by the concept of being swaddled as if he were a gassy baby instead of a deathless sky monster in a sexy dude-shaped can. But Dean must be giving off some serious man on the edge vibes because Cas grudgingly agrees to let Dean tape him up the next time he’s feeling dozy. 

It’s real awkward and takes forever to get Cas bundled up right, and then he’s just kind of lying there on top of the sheets, like an enormous, grumpy baked potato. 

“I could easily break out of these restraints,” he says in a pissy tone after Dean has crawled in and turned off the light, and Dean rolls over to tell him “no shit”, but then he has to stop himself because the guy is already asleep.

Eventually they upgrade to a version made out of some of those trendy weighted blanket things, a few yards of parachute silk, and a whole lot of velcro. The dude looks so damn peaceful that Dean is honestly a little jealous.

*he doesn’t, actually. 

 18.  There’s a sunny afternoon that isn’t the usual Kansas is trying to murder you level of humid so Dean rolls the Impala out into the street for a wash. Cas helps him out a bit initially, although tragically not in a way that involves removing any unnecessary articles of clothing, but Deans sends him to grab a new tub of wax from the shed and he never comes back. After half an hour Dean needs a beer break and goes looking for him, expecting to find Cas lost in thought over whether Turtle Wax is made of actual turtles, or is made to put on actual turtles. Instead he finds Cas crouched on the shimmering pavement at the back of the driveway, sun beating down on him like it has a personal vendetta, and he’s got both wings stretched out real low above the ground. Dean kind of flips out because it’s the type of pose that just screams “stabbed in gut by angel blade” or “migraine from Hell, literally.”

Then Cas looks up, which pulls his wings up a smidge too, which in turn reveals that fully half a dozen neighborhood cats are lounging in the shady patch beneath his wings, spread out on the concrete like blobs of furry peanut butter. No, it’s actually eight cats. There are eight cats.

“Ling-Ling was feeling a little overheated,” Cas says, as if this explains everything. 

And, you know what, at this point, it does.

 19.  Dean has faith that eventually Sam or Cas or the third demon from the left in the second row will turn up a solution for the whole business. Castiel will get to tuck those bad boys back into the secret wing-closet dimension and he won’t have to worry about getting stuck in stairwells anymore, or being reported to the FAA (again). Then they can finally pack up the house, plaster over the more egregious spots of drywall damage, and go back to killing things outside of the tri-county area. The whole thing has been a pretty embarrassing interlude for a couple of dudes who’ve kicked Satan’s ass multiple times — Sam is probably telling other hunters that they’ve been deep undercover to take out a nest of suburban vampires, or a pack of ghouls with mortgages, instead of vacuuming angel down out of the AC unit and considering a Costco membership. 

And sure, there have been some...serious pluses to the situation (see: the other list), but, in his weaker moments, Dean has to admit that he’s kind of going to miss some of the goofy, irritating shit, too — like finding a six-inch feather in the veggie crisper (how? why?), or watching Cas fwap his wings out just in time to accidentally clothesline a jogger, or even the strangely compelling, sorta cheesy smell that starts to float around the house if Cas goes a little too long between hosedowns. 

He has actually grown fond of this shit. Which is 100% the least sexy thing on earth, it’s some genuinely, seriously pathetic goo goo crap, and that’s why nobody will ever hear a fucking word about it. People will ask “so what’s it like, with the wings” and Dean will waggle his eyebrows suggestively and review the highlight reel over an inadvisable amount of rail whiskey. His secret’s safe with, well. Him.

 20.  Seriously though, the bird mites. 

Gross.

[shozaii]

Hey! I love your writing! It's so cute. 💖 Can you write a HC about s/o and Todoroki, Bakugou, Shinsou and Kirishima first time? (It's the first time for both of them) I'm already excited to read aaa You can add another character if you feel like to.

(a/n): hello! ahhh thank you🥺❤️ i hope you enjoy them!

ps; i’m assuming it’s their first time dating don’t come for mE KSJSJS

requests are still open!💜

masterlist

•••

first time!

warnings: aged up characters! and slight nsfw!

•••

kirishima❤️

can we,,, talk about this,,🥺

eijirou would be the happiest man on earth when he finds out you have feelings for him.

you had no experience of dating, so what do? you wanted to tell your feelings but then you were freaking out

i have this feeling that he thinks nobody could ever fall for him (WHICH IS FALSE) but you proved him wrong🥰

and yes, he has feelings for you too! cue him being alone in his dorm, dancing to the cutest love songs that reminds him of you jsjdj

so it’s late at night, and he called you out to have a little chat with you

you knew the chat was something else AHA

and so there you two were, outside the dorms, in the cold night. when he saw you, he smiled his usual toothy grin and signalled you to come over.

when he confesses, your heart pounded so hard you could hear it

“i’ve been waiting my whole life to say this! i get it if you really don’t want to-you know... but before i lose my chances, might as well get it out,right?”

and before he could finish, you pulled him into a hug, burying your face into his sweater.

you two are the cutest couple alive. mina takes tons of pictures of you two (sometimes sneakily)

kaminari constantly teases you two, sero feels like a proud dad😳

and when you two train, it’s like you two were made for each other. even your quirks make the perfect combo!

he texts you whenever he’s not able to see you

it’s his first time dating someone so he promises to be the best boyfriend to you! he takes you out on dates, buys you your favorite candy, gifts you tons of kisses

he knows you love his hair down so on most dates, you’d see that a lot!

he’s fine with holding hands in public because he feels this manliness in him surging😤❤️

he always gives you little pecks on your cheeks and you do the same. he just didn’t know how he was going to kiss you on the lips?? he wanted it to be special so he waited.

the time came, when you two were in his room, slow dancing with the lights dimmed out. he was nerVoUs and you were too.

that’s when he went in for it.

his kisses are slow and passionate. he doesn’t want to rush because when he’s with you, time is limitless. imagine the whole world revolving around you were just stars in the night sky. fireworks from a distance.it was momentary bliss, to be honest.

he looks you in the eyes and asks, “you okay with this?”

you blushed. “yeah.”

he holds your cheek, leaning in as your lips fit together perfectly. he even smiles in between kisses because he’s just so happy🥺💕💕💕

you two end up in bed and go ‘???how did we get here???’

then you resorted to laying down on the bed. you laid on top of him, leaving a few more pecks on his forehead before settling in.

you can never go wrong with a boy like eijirou🌸

todoroki❄️

most probably the boy to be shook when he found out he had feelings for someone.

especially the someone being you. his intentions could never go wrong. i mean,,,look at you. a masterpiece from heaven itself.

right in front of him, blessing his sour days.

probably started around the time after the sports festival. he couldn’t help but notice your cheerful self in class. how you smile at your classmates. the little gestures that made them happy.

it made him happy too.

and you loved talking to shoto too! he was really quiet at first; but it was you who knew how to break the ice apart(no pun intended)

he told midoriya about it, sweating.

“well, todoroki. i’m sure your feelings wouldn’t lie to you! follow what’s best for you.”

he smiled. he knew his decision that very moment.

love is a new feeling to him- since his childhood days weren’t the best. and when he felt it, his emotions were all over the place.

you too, were astonished. you knew from the beginning of school days, you had fallen for him. so what were you about to do? leave it behind? find a way to let it out?

shoto also prefers to admit it to you personally. so he did it right after school finishes-while everyone was heading back to the dorms.

“y/n. i need to talk to you for a second.”

“sure! what’s up?”

he’s pretty straightforward, so he’d say it immediately.

“i like you. a lot.”

“ah! i like you too! that’s-“

“no. i like like you. um, feelings.”

you paused. well, it was obvious. you two were alone, he was blushing.

oh my god my crush just said he likes me.

paniK

it was mutual!🥰 a few were shocked to find out that you both were in a relationship. some people described you as polar opposites. others already knew that you had a crush on him, wink wonk

shoto has never really gotten physical affection for a long time, so it takes a while for him to settle in. but that doesn’t stop him from being with you almost 24/7

he learnt that he loved being kissed by you on the forehead. it was such a simple yet deep reassurance that you were there for him.

he loved kissing you on the cheek🥺❤️ he finds your cheeks so squishy and adorable. he also loves ruffling your hair during your cuddle sessions.

he loves loves loves it when he hovers over you while you’re on his bed-looking like the angel you are, and he starts leaving the trail of kisses from the cheek, slowly to the lips. it was a feathery peck. he was afraid that you didn’t want it.

but looking into your eyes, it was a plead for more. he closed in the gap between you two. your hands wrapped around his shoulders, and his hands landed on your waist.

momentary bliss part 2

sometimes you two communicate through each other’s eyes. no one else gets it😌

your quirks are a match made in heaven. it surprises aizawa on a whole new level.

he learned beforehand about a few of your favorite things so he decided to get them for you.

would max out endeavor’s card for you

long walks in the park, mall visits-anything you want, he gives.

somehow you always made him feel so special. and he was so glad his first time was a blessing.

bakugou💥

“i don’t have feelings! now quit it!” he says while literally blushing in front of the bakusquad. yeah i definitely see that happening.

blushes so red but wipes it off as if he’s got a fever. damn bakubake🥺

you didn’t know what he meant, feelings for who?

and that was because you had them for katsuki. like, a whole lot.

he may be an angry pomeranian, but he’s your favorite pomeranian😌❤️

everyone is so confused. how did you- a wonderful human being, so delicate and graceful, had fallen for katsuki??? nobody knew, and nobody judged.

because they knew, it was you who was falling in love🥺 so they were supportive.

remember that one dance the bakusquad and uraraka did when they got through the exam? that was exactly what they did when you told them about you liking him

i mean,,, that boy looks at you from afar during class. he chooses to watch your quirk develop during training. he goes quiet when he sees you.

like cue him screaming at both kaminari and sero. then you come in, and he goes all silent. he doesn’t say a word. just this peaceful look on his face

you know, the soft face bakugou makes when he thinks?? that one. only you had that switch

alright, he’s had enough. he’s gonna square up, walk right up to you, and say, “yeah i like you. what about it?”

easy right?

no. he was a trembling meSS. it was his first proposal thingy!! being nervous is normal,duh.

screams into the night, thinking of the words to tell you. he messes up and the whole world (namely the bakusquad) go crazy on him.

he’s gonna do it. and so the next day was a fresh start for him. walked up to you.

god, were you a glimmering beauty.

“what is it? you seemed a little riled up lately. you okay?” you asked, genuinely concerned with his face.

“ilikeyou,” he mumbles. and you go, “huh? sorry katsu, can you please-“

“y/n i have feelings for you! hear me?”

you were just there, like :0

“i don’t do stuff like this. just get it over with if you don’t feel the same.”

“hey, hey! i r-really like you too! i was just finding a way to let you know... but i guess i didn’t have to.”

“ha, well look who won,” baby boy smirks.

dude he’s so happy his heart was doing somersaults

he didn’t mind if your relationship was a secret or not; you were his anyway. but it was for a little while. he made sure you felt comfortable

the little dance comes along again from the four of them

you two love training together! he makes sure you’re doing it right and he allows you to correct him too. only you🤭💕

i’d like to think that he would stop calling you names like dumbass, or idiot. maybe it would turn to baby or babygirl. babe. hottie. sweet names for his s/o

dates with him are wholesome. carnival, a little cafe, movies. he takes you to the beach during sunset if you’re feeling down

then he gets you these gifts you could forever cherish😭

would definitely hold hands with you. tough guy game🥺👉👈

so far, he loves it when you ruffle his hair. heck, he doesn’t care at all when you do it in front of anyone. he just gives this stupid grin which says, “look at my baby.”

flusters when you hug him out of nowhere,though🤪

when nobody’s looking/during school hours, he gives quick pecks. nothing more, nothing less.

kisses with katsuki are rich in passion and devotion. you know what he means with every one he gives you. the first time he kissed you probably happened during a warm cozy night in with him, in your room. he wouldn’t ask. it was just like a surprise.

“babe.”

his heart beated faster than a race car. you replied, “hm? what is it?”

pecks your lips and pretends like it was nothing. you smirked, holding his chin.

“what? i just..tried? don’t look at me like that.”

“but you didn’t say for how long.”

“clever.” he said as you brought his face near yours.

you had to admit, you weren’t so brave. but seeing this boy blush after his usual screamo days boost you up. so you did it. you sealed it off with a kiss. this time, a longer one.

you breathed in his light caramel scent- now lingering on your clothes as he pulled you in his embrace. his fingers slowly intertwined in yours.

momentary bliss part 3 (god i love these so far)

all in all, i would forever believe his s/o is the only one who can see his soft side. katsuki makes sure to treat you well like never before❤️

shinsou💜

very, very nonchalant about his feelings for you

but he had to control the way he almost tried to swoon around you oh my god

you two have conversations as usual, it’s nice talking to him. he opens up to a whole new version of him that you rarely see.

he had no idea you had a crush on him too sksjdkd

this man is so stoic, he technically holds it all in when talking to you. (which of course, is the cutest thing in the whole world)

hitoshi may have actually been worried about the things people have told him. how they might have talked behind his back. avoided him because of his quirk.

but when it came to you, it all changed. you weren’t running away. you didn’t flinch at his sight. most of all, you were just being you.

like shoto, i don’t think anyone would expect him to fall for you or vice versa. hence, when they found out, it would be a surprise🥰

mans gotta plan this whole thing for weeks because you’re too perfect to lose😤

your classmates had to make you talk to him just because you were so shy hhhh

he texted you one day, wanting to meet you. you were freaking out, but still prepped for what was about to be the best day of your life

the sun was slowly setting. you meet him in a park nearby. he was standing next to the lamp post, looking through his phone.

he looked so good in his dark blue flannel, with his white t-shirt and black jeans. his hair was tucked back with a headband.(he was already handsome, so take this😤💜💜)

“sorry, had to call you out like this.”

“no, it’s fine! what’s up?”

deep breaths..! “um, y/n. i find you really-i just... argh what am i doing..? i really like you and-“

he placed a hand on his neck. “i don’t know how to put it to words. but i absolutely want to be with you. for a really long time. it sounds weird, but you mean so much to me”

your vision was blurry. you didn’t realise that you were letting the feels hit so easily

“hitoshi, i get it all.”

“you...do?”

“because i feel the same as you.”

this cute grin (inherited by aizawa) when he heard those words. “come here,” he said, pulling you into a hug.

and so it began, a beautiful relationship.

you two shared so much with each other. it was like watching puzzle pieces fit in perfectly.

he listens to every problem you have and you do the same. it’s always equality in the house. one never goes down or up. it’s always together🥰

10/10 would train with you to develop your quirk. he wants you to join the journey

pda is fine with him, holding hands should do! might as well surprise you with back hugs🤪 and then he lifts you, spins you around until you beg him to stop.

only you can take care of his sleep schedule.

sometimes he comes to school without any sleep and you blow up

“what did i tell you?”

“i had six cups of coffee. no big deal.”

“how-“

he shows you pictures of his cats😭😭💜 he has so many

he is the cat himself so he likes to nuzzle up when you both cuddle. and it’s a must for you to run your fingers through his soft locks😌

when he’s the big spoon, prepare yourself for some wholesome content.

praises you 24/7, tickle fights, boops your nose, little naps

hitoshi enjoys kisses on the neck too! whether it’s height difference or not,,, he reaches for the neck because this boy KNOWS your sensitive spots.🤭

when he goes in for it, he wants it to be a memory.a priceless, flavorful one he leaves with you which is hard to forget.

fun fact: kiss him on the jawline and you’re already making him weAK

but if it’s a subtle one, he would go for the face. any parts of it-cheek, forehead, bottom of your lips.

one fine day he just has you against the wall and you’re just standing there, a blushing mess.

“close your eyes.”

“w-why..?? are you about to steal kisses from me,toshi?”

“maybe, kitten. but you have to tell me if you trust me.”

you closed your eyes, and he cupped your face with his hands. he brought your face up to his, slowly connecting your lips. the last thing he’d want was to scare you

he felt you smile in between the kiss. you didn’t hesitate, didn’t pull away. in fact, you were more than happy by just returning it. his hand travelled down to your thigh, bringing it up to his waist.

his head was dizzy with euphoria. you were such a good kisser, damn. when he let go, both of you were breathless.

“i do trust you,silly.”

yES IT WAS momentary bliss part four babyyyy

hitoshi defines a godly amount of,,,heat. just,,,he’s hot. and cute. perfect.

(a/n): ayee i did it!!! slight nsfw/nsfw work is reallyyy not my thing so i hope this was a fun read!!! jekskd fun fact scenarios are my fav thing to write🥰

[elishamanning]

Kramer: "Well, with us... we ask ourselves, how can something like (the Leverkusen game) happen, and we notice our surroundings asking that, we on the inside ask ourselves that, sometimes we come to a weird conclusion, what, do we have two faces? But we only think that because we only look at ourselves. But what do the Dortmunders think, winning 5-1 against Frankfurt, thus German champions obviously, then they lose 2-1 in Freiburg and everybody's thinking, well, they're not that good, are they. Will Bayern show their Supercup face, or their face-against-us, or against 1. FC Köln? The Leipzigers, do they show their Mainz-face or that outstanding show they put on against Stuttgart? These "problems of consistency" when you're a Gladbach fan, or a Gladbach player, you think 'these are Gladbach-only problems', but the others have them as well. It's always a matter of how you handle it and that you don't let it... well, tear you down emotionally. The important thing is to avoid a negative spiral, mentally, because, as everybody who's ever played football will know, in the end the decisive issue is always in your head (((aaaah, that's a bad translation. It's a mental issue, is what he says.))), and it always will be." Knippi: "Completely agree. And by the way, that's not limited to football." Kramer: "Well, exactly. It's not even worth discussing, when you enjoy doing something, when you're positive about it - it's not exactly a brand-new psychological finding - it'll always turn out better than when you're negative about it. So let's not, after the second matchday, tear everything down, and let's not, after the first matchday, praise everything to the heavens." Knippi: "Did you expect that? Becoming professional footballers, all that stuff that comes with it, besides playing football, all that stuff raining down on you?" Neuhaus: "Well, it just happens, it just all happens automatically. In the end, you become a footballer because you have fun playing football, and you don't much think about that kind of stuff that comes with it. You grow into it and you learn to handle it." Knippi: "So you're not actively getting prepared for that? Because in the last podcast you (Chris) said 'that's the guys from the NLZ' So it's not part of your training there?" Neuhaus: "No, it wasn't a subject in mine." Kramer: "Well to be completely honest, looking back, I thought football would be funnier, or at least less serious, and a bit more honest. That's also why I like this club so much, because I know that here at least you get an honest basis, like, I feel understood here, I have a certain relationship of trust to, for example, Max Eberl, but I wouldn't have imagined, without spilling any beans now, that football's such a not-really-nice business. So this is one of the best things here, for me, knowing that I have an honest and trustful basis that can be built on. And I really wouldn't have ever imagined it all to be so grossly serious. Sometimes I think inappropriately serious, because football is such a beautiful thing and when you get to do it as a profession, plaiyng football, there's nothing easier than joyfully going somewhere every day. These are the best conditions to have, the working hours, just turning your hobby into a profession - everything about football is 'geil', but still you get this completely inappropriate seriousness about it making you go, aw, it's tough. That's a shame I think, I wouldn't have thought so when I started out. I always wanted to be a footballer because, well, for one it's my passion, but also I thought every day would just be fun, and I think it should be, and that in the end that would be performance-enhancing, I'm quite sure about that. (laughing, saying that)." Knippi: "What do you think?" Neuhaus: "Always hard to disagree. The gist is we're all playing football because it's great fun being on the pitch. Of course there are always periods when it's a little harder but all in all and especially looking back you always regard things much more positive

than maybe you felt in that particular moment. (I don't really understand what he's saying there), but anyway the positives should always be front centre." Knippi: "What you just said, Chris, the seriousness, I also think it's too much sometimes. For example if a team's not playing well and the people on the pitch get personally attacked/insulted. I get to witness that when I'm down there, and sometimes I think 'what is wrong with you?', like, I get being unhappy when the team that has your heart isn't doing well, being unhappy, or sad, or disappointed, I get that, but not attacking the players personally. Well thank God that isn't an issue currently, and there's no reason why it should be." Kramer: "No, I don't think that's happened to me in my career... Well, once, playing with VfL Bochum in Aue, I was pelted with snowballs by our own fans but, in retrospect, that was quite funny." Knippi: "Like how?" Kramer: "Well, because we lost 6-1 playing in the snow. I'd say I'm a good player on snow, but, well, Ronny König is the best snow-player on this planet. He (literally he says 'he put four cherries into our basket', meaning he scored four goals... as you probably would have guessed.) So then our own fans, who'd travelled to Aue on a Monday night, threw snow balls at us, and we completely deserved it. And I do think every fan is right, and has the right, to use this outlet, that they're paying money for, to let off steam. Because football, in the end, is entertainment. Only, it doesn't help. What I meant with the seriousness is the whole stuff around it as well. Football is just a game. It's supposed to be fun, but sometimes I think, looking at the newspapers, all the sociopolitical issues, and seriousness... it's still football." Knippi: "Did I just understand you correctly, you're saying it's a fan's right to pelt you with snowballs?" Kramer: "Well... it gets its down dynamic, and it's not too bad. If someone insults me, say, I don't really have a problem with that. I don't take it personally because I don't think it's meant that way. It may not be the right approach and I may not understand their motive, but... that person is angry, they've had a bad week at work, then they come here, and we play badly ("nur hintenrum" - too defensively) so they have a right to...-as a fan, of course, you have to question whether that's doing any good. We've not really had that here in Gladbach and when there were beginnings of it, we had talks with the ultras, and stuff, we're quite close to the fans, so we don't really have that issue here, but you do see it with other clubs, and close friends of mine, they have had situations where I'd really say, now this is too much (I wonder if he's talking of Leon/the end at Schalke here), and that's just not on, but generally, we are an outlet for many and football is entertainment. When you're not being entertained you're entitled to boo. I don't mind. There's just this double standard - look at me, talking again for ten minutes straight (Knippi and Flo laugh), and you have to cut it all afterwards- once again I take ten minutes to get to the point, but you can't - you want to play with a young squad, and they'll make mistakes. You can't boo them. Or you can't say you want to play with a young squad. Very simply put." Knippi: "Tommy Schmitt, your successor at 11Freunde put it quite well there, I thought. It's very counterproductive to boo and whistle." Kramer: "Yes, well, you have to ask yourself, no matter what you do - I mean when you get to the office and everybody's scowling at you, thinking 'what an idiot!', you'll feel that as a person with empathy, like every footballer, and when you're booed, that does something to you... I can promise everybody: booing a player will never make them better, not ever." Knippi: "'Snow-player' you just said. You're not a good 'snow-player'." Kramer: "I'm a GREAT snow-player!" Neuhaus: "They lost 6-1, I don't think he's that great. They wouldn't have lost 6-1, would they?" Kramer: "Well Leon, Leon Goretzka

and I, we still talk a lot about that day. I'd say, Leon and I, we both have these long levers, we really are good snow-players, on a proper layer of snow, like there in Aue. But Ronny König! He's Messi on snow. Awesome, really." Knippi: "Wouldn't it be better to have short legs and a low centre of gravity?" Kramer: "I don't know. I don't think so. I mean, looking at Leon, and myself, AND Ronny König you can conclude the tall ones with the long legs are good on snow." (very scientific, this.) Knippi: "What kind of a snow-player are you?" Neuhaus: "There weren't any snow-games anymore in my time." Kramer: "NLZ, dude!" Knippi: "I know but..." Kramer: "No!" Neuhaus: "Climate change." Knippi: "But in your youth you must have played on snow once, haven't you?" Neuhaus: "Hardly." Knippi: "You're THAT young?!" Neuhaus: "At 1860 we had astroturf with undersoil heating." Knippi: "Did you ever play on clay?" Neuhaus: "...and anywhere in the stadiums today. There just aren't snow games like that anymore these days." Kramer: "He's from Bavaria, they don't have clay. They just have meadows and pastures, they play on the most beautiful pitches. Here in NRW when you're playing Galatasaray Mühlheim you know what's going down? You know what's going down, playing on clay?" Neuhaus: "I can just imagine." Kramer: "You take two weeks before you can go back to school because your legs - you simply can't walk anymore..." Knippi: "You've never played on clay?" Neuhaus: "No, never." Knippi: "You don't know that feeling when your grazed-open thigh is stuck to your jeans?" Neuhaus: "Yes, well, as a little child I played on the street..." (It goes on a bit yet, but I've already fallen asleep twice and I'm not sure these "translations" are making much sense anyway, so I'll leave it at this, now, alright? Flo played on asphalt, so he knows about open wounds from football. And Knippi claims he's still got remnants of clay in his thigh from decades ago. Hehe. I'll do the rest another time.)

first of all THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH

it's always interesting to hear about a player's mindset

it's really interesting to see how an athlete's relationship with their changes over time. like to have something that was for fun and a hobby turn into your job is a pretty incredible transition. it's something a lot of people experience to an extent, but to have it on this high a level is pretty unique.

Kramer: "No, I don't think that's happened to me in my career... Well, once, playing with VfL Bochum in Aue, I was pelted with snowballs by our own fans but, in retrospect, that was quite funny."

chrikra???? please??? what is this... snowballs???

i also agree that while fans are allowed to show their discontent, it does often cross a line. idk if he was referring to something like leon's ending with schalke, but that instance of schalke fans chasing and attacking the players is something that definitely comes to mind here. i think i actually draw a shorter line than chrikra here.

Neuhaus: "There weren't any snow-games anymore in my time." Kramer: "NLZ, dude!" Knippi: "I know but..." Kramer: "No!" Neuhaus: "Climate change." Knippi: "But in your youth you must have played on snow once, haven't you?" Neuhaus: "Hardly." Knippi: "You're THAT young?!"

omg flo please

i do love the idea of chrikra and leon reminiscing about their old games together... my heart

anyway i love this podcast and i hope they do more of it

and thank you again SO MUCH