#literally like I wouldn’t give a shit if you were sending me death threats or whatever

[sevengraces]

Self Sabotage v. Found Family

ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, YOU, title card

AO3 Link

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One conversation does not undo years of insecurity, but it does give a pretty good start.

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What's up!! Last chapter of this part!! I know folks were excited to see Philza and I'm with you, but I like to do things in threes lol so you'll have to wait for the next installment. TWs: Threats Technos' Chat being themselves References to violence Fake Lore Insecurity Anxiety References to past Temporary Character Death That should be everything but let me know (:

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Chapter 5: Lore Dump 2 Electric Boogaloo

    They stayed in place for a long time. But eventually Technoblade slowly pulled out of the group pile and moved back a foot or so, actively ignoring his soft blush.

    Tubbo and Tommy stayed sprawled across Wilbur but Niki gently extracted herself and asked, “Are you okay?”

    He nodded slowly, “I mean, m’fine.” The boy paused for a long moment before hesitantly beginning, “You guys aren’t, uh- well, nevermind.” He cut himself off, rubbing a hand down his face.

    Tommy rolled his eyes, “C’mon, just ask. Didn’t take you for a coward.”

    “What he means is,” Tubbo cut in, hitting Tommy on the shoulder. “You don’t need to worry about telling us things.”

    Chat jeered,

    We really doin’ this?

    Softnoblade

    W take from Tubbo

    RIP trying to be vulnerable with an internal audience making fun of you all the time

    The boy laughed and muttered quietly in piglin, “And yet you don’t stop making fun, hypocrites.” before answering flatly, “You’re going to be annoyed.”

    Wilbur shrugged his shoulders and flicked Tubbo absentmindedly, “Maybe, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t say it. Plus you’ve cried like ten times in the last week so if that didn’t send us away one more question won’t do it.”

    “It’s not like you’ve hesitated to annoy us before.” Niki chimed in indulgently.

    Technoblade flushed to the tips of his ears and chuffed anxiously, “W- ten times? No nevermind, I don’t wanna know about it.” he sighed dramatically and put his head on his knees. “It isn’t that big ‘a deal, and this is different th’n teasing you for being losers.”

    “If it isn’t a big deal then you can just tell us!” Tubbo responded good-naturedly.

    Bruh

    Got you there lol

    There is like no plot or lore right now

    EEEeeeeeee

    “Fine, but it’s stupid.” he exhaled heavily, “You guys aren’t just uh, jus’ saying all that right? ‘Cause I don’t mind if you are, obviously, but the viewers y’know.” Techno shrugged and stared into his lap.

    Misrepresentation your honor

    Boo!

    Slander

    Wilbur furrowed his brow, “I have literally no idea what you’re talking about mate. Like none, but uh for now what would we be just saying?”

    Technoblade breathed slowly through his teeth, “Y’know all that stuff ‘bout uh- come on don’t make me say it, that’s cringe.” He groaned in frustration.

    Tommy laughed, “But vulnerability’s pogchamp! Healthy masculinity and shit!”

    “If it’s hard to explain, can you just think through it out loud?” Niki offered.

    “I- it isn’t difficult, okay? It’s just, y’know cringe. I’d die if I said it and Technoblade never dies so, I just can’t.”

    Tubbo smiled bemusedly, “So you want to know if we are lying about something, but you can’t say it ‘cause it’s embarrassing? So embarrassing you’d die?”

    Techno nodded quickly, “Yup, right on the money, so nope. Won’t be uh, asking that actually.”

    Wilbur snorted behind his hand. “So you never die, but uh, vulnerability would kill you?”

    “Listen,” the hybrid began with a degree of condescension, “Technoblade never dies, not because it’s impossible, that wouldn’t be impressive. It’s ‘cause I don’t do things that kill me.”

    Tommy scoffed and leaned forward until he was sprawled across Wilbur’s lap, “What so you don’t do things that kill you but you do 1v20 an entire country?”

    “Didn’t kill me, did it?”

    “Bruh, it killed me!” Tubbo replied, laughing as he collapsed on top of Tommy.

    Technoblade cringed, “Well, I didn’t say Tubbo never dies?”

    Niki hid a laugh behind a cough, “No! That is not funny, it isn’t!”

    Tubbo smiled, “Well, like no, it wasn’t funny but the jokes are.”

    “I mean, well, s’just- uh.” Technoblade pinched the bridge of his nose and muttered under his breath in piglin,”Godsdamnit, I’m really gonna do this, huh Chat. Alright honesty lets go.” before butting in louder, “You uh, y’know I didn’t like uh- ya’ get I didn’t wan’ to right?”

    Tubbo turned to stare for a moment, trailing off mid word.

    The piglin flushed at the sudden attention his yelling gathered. “S’just I mean that you uh- ya’ said we’re cool. And like yeah! Nice, but uh- I figured you’d uh, y’know, want some character development. And like may- maybe you’re just uh fine, and I shoulda’ just uh- uh, kept with the bit, there’s jus’ I didn’ wan’ it ta’ be like ‘gnored. I prolly shoulda’ but uhm, it seems ‘specially shitty to uhm assume? That like we’d be uh cool ‘cause I beat up Tommy, since he wouldn’t really be able to beat me anyways? Y’know maybe I sho- should uhm deal with tha’ too but uh we’re talkin’ ‘bout us and stuff.” He cleared his throat, “So uh, anyways. Y’know my bad.”

    Wilbur snorted before collapsing onto Tommy’s back in laughter. Tommy crowed out a token protest before joining in the teasing, “You jus’ ne’er talk before! I think that’s the most you’ve ever said, big man! I thought you were being all in-timi-dat-ing an’ shit when you didn’t talk before but, was it just to make sure you didn’t do all that?”

    Nikachu choked down her laughter and smacked Wilbur, “C’mon, s’not uh- not that bad?”

    Tubbo shushed them before turning to the younger, who was staring at the ceiling with a bright red face and ears folded down in embarrassment. His tail was being wrung through his hands in his lap. “I- thanks Tech. Really that was uhm, sweet of you? Yeah it wasn’t super cool that I died, but uhm. I kinda figured that you didn’t want to kill me there? We uh, shouldn’t have left you out to dry like that. But I ‘preciate that you apologized, you coulda’ just left it alone so that was cool of you.”

    Technoblade went even pinker and mumbled into his lap, “Wasn’ sweet was jus’ right ta’ say so. S’not like you coulda’ helped me anyways, you were bein’ executed.”

     Tommy cooed loudly, “Aww, Techie! S’okay it was sweet!”

     His ears flickered and he ran a hand through his hair, “Whatever.”

    Bullying

    Harassment!!

    Bruh really hit him with the honesty huh

    Healthy communication pog

    RIP runt just suffering

    Niki rolled her eyes at the bickering, “Alright, alright, we’re getting off track. Technoblade, do you want to ask us?”

    The boy grumbled for a moment and hid behind his hair, “.... yes?”

    Wilbur grinned, “Alright then Tech, c’mon we believe in you and all that shit.”

    “Yeah, plus it’s not like whatever it is can be more embarrassing than tryin’ to say it for ten minutes.” Tommy added, to which Tubbo shoved him once more.

    The voices laughed and encouraged in equal measure;

    Imagine getting read so easily lol

    YOu can dO IT!

    Consider stabbing then running tho

    Just say it all at once!

    F

    Techno pulled his knees up and continued to hide behind his hair, “Alright, alright, s’fine. They’ll just say they don’t and I’ll be right.” he muttered in piglin before taking one deep breath and answering. “D’ya mean it when you say all that uhm, stuff ‘bout y’know keepin’ me and uh caring all th’ time? ‘Cause like I said, I don’t care if ya don’t right? S’just the ratings and shit, gotta keep it uh entertaining.” he spoke in an anxious rush.

    Nikachu smiled despite her befuddlement. “We wouldn’t say it if we didn’t mean it, Tech, alright? Though I really don’t know what you’re talking about with ratings and audiences and such.”

    “Yeah! You’re stuck with us, even if I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about most o’ the time!” Tommy shouted

    Tubbo pushed Tommy off of his back and gave Techno a small hug before sitting back, “We mean it, ‘course we do. S’ not stupid to want reassurance.”

    “Yeah, yeah, we love you and shit,” Wilbur began, waving his hands dramatically, “but really what are you on about mate?”

    Ha ha! Our turn!

    You make too many references for someone who wants to keep us secret

    Lore?

    That’s us!!

    “I’m not used to people listening when I say shit, okay? They usually jus’ think I’ve lost it Chat!” Technoblade muttered to himself before leaning back from his knees and looking at the group. He deliberated internally for a long moment, “S’just the voices, that’s all.” he answered nonchalantly.

    “The voices?” Wilbur asked.

    Hey, not just!

    We’re cool af!

     Introduce us you coward

     If it doesn’t work we’ll just murder them y’know how it is.

     EEEEEEeeeee

    “I mean, you guys didn’t think I was the Blood God right? Like ya’ didn’t think I was a god right?” Techno asked evasively.

    Tubbo quirked his head to the left, “I mean no? I didn’t think you were a god, you’re impressive but not that impressive. What’s that got to do with anything?”

    “Are you deflecting again? If you don’t want to answer you just gotta say so.” Niki added.

    He shook his head, “No that’s uh- that’s not it. Okay, this is gonna require a bit of context.” the hybrid stretched his arms upwards before situating himself across from the others, “All right everybody shut it, this is uh, prime Technoblade Lore so no interuptin’ m’kay?”

    Tommy huffed, “Fine, it better not be boring though.”

    Wilbur flicked the back of the blonds’ head and leaned back on his arms, leaving Tommy sprawled across his lap and Tubbo nearly on top of him. Niki laid down on her stomach to the left of the others.

    “Nope, uh not gonna be boring.” Technoblade laughed to himself for a moment before starting, “Right, I left my sounder when I was three or so for whatever reason. It happens, usually ya’ end up in a new sounder or you die because lot’s of things want to kill you in the Nether and sometimes players show up and just stab ya. I did not find a new sounder and I did not die, obviously.” he rolled his eyes, “There are reasons for that, y’know maybe I was just better but uh- well s’ more likely that the voices saved me. You see, I was born a vessel. For whatever reason the Blood God claimed me and uh, in return he gave me something called Chat.”

    Yup yup yup yup yup

    Canon

    Explain the Blood God!!

    Use the cool name! cool name pogchamp

    Blood pog?

    “You do know like the Blood God’s whole deal?” Techno asked reluctantly.

    Wilbur shrugged, “I mean, a bit? He takes a blood sacrifice in return for strength right? He’s like a war god?”

    The boy sighed, “Among other things, yeah. Also the god of loyalty, family, vengeance, etc. But yeah. The Blood God gave me Chat, sometimes they call themselves The Chorus when they're feeling sanctimonious, they're his past followers/vessels/victims or something like that. But for whatever reason he figured I could be strong. They give me a bit of an edge, usually they know a bit more than me so they warn me sometimes. They care about me or whatever, but uh they’re stuck in my head so they demand entertainment and interaction. Also blood, a lot of blood.”

    Niki leaned heavily on her hands, “So can it hear us?”

    “They, it’s a lot of people or something, and yes. They watch and give their input on basically everything, regardless of how unnecessary or useful.” Techno shook his head in exasperation.

    “So do they like me?” Tommy asked immediately.

    Technoblade laughed, “Uhm, sometimes? They usually just think you’re amusing or annoying, but again it’s a thousand voices in my head all yelling out for attention, so I’m not confident on how all of them feel about you.”

    “So they’re who you were talking about when you said it was too loud? And who you’re talking to when you mutter in piglin?” Niki asked in concern.

    The piglin nodded.

    Wilbur frowned, “Don’t they know it hurts, since it’s in your head?”

    He shrugged, “I mean yeah, when they get too loud some of the voices remind others not to spam, but like, it isn’t like they’re nice. They’re trapped in my skull so it’s really just as much theirs as mine.”

    “It isn’t though, it’s your head! They should be nice to you.” Tubbo huffed angrily.

    Goat boy thinks we’re mean lol

    Pretty sure he’s a ram

    We can be meaner if he wants

    Bruh he’d be bitter too if he was trapped in a fourteen year old for eternity

    “No you guys don’t have to do that, they just don’t understand okay? I get it, it’s fine m’kay? ” Techno mumbled quickly before turning to glare at the others. “Listen, I understand this is an odd arrangement, but no. They don’t need to be nicer, alright? They’ve kept me alive, and they were just as much thrown into this as me. Chat is cool, okay? They can be loud and annoying and bitter, especially if they don’t get blood, but they’ve been nicer to me than anyone else for much longer so, not really. You can’t just say stuff like that. I like the Blood God, but he isn’t nice either and Chat was a gift from him, not really in the mood to see how angry I can make my patron.”

    Tubbo cringed and nodded, his face pale.

    “But they take care of you, yeah?” Wilbur asked.

    Technoblade exhaled, “Yes, they take care of me. And plus, they’re typically chill, so long as they’re getting some type of blood. They're even funny on occasion.”

    Niki nodded, “I mean I won’t say I get it, but that’s uhm neat?”

    The boy laughed, “Well, better reaction than most people’ve had.”

    Wilbur chuckled, “I know you said it can be hard to tell, and that they thought Tommy was annoying, but what do they think of all this?” he asked while he gestured at himself and the others.

    Bruh

    That’s funny, is Wilbur insecure?

    EEEEE

    We are always funny you're just a loser

    You’re cool ig

    It’d be funny if we killed you but Niki is nice and dadza’d be pissed

    L

    Shoulda been nicer in the beginning

    We’ll kill you if you use him

    When he introduces us and just says we're kinda funny sometimes

    Bruh

    He’s our runt first!!

    Softbur

    We control your headache level lol, watch it little pig

    Revolution pog

    Techno winced at the influx of voices, “Do I really have to say all that?”

    Yes

    “Right, uhm, right now they’re making fun of Wilbur specifically. Said you shoulda been nicer in the beginning? Uh, they’d kill you but Phil would be mad and they like Niki ‘cause she’s nice?” he sighed dramatically, “That’s about the best you’ll get I think?”

    Ours!

    Ours, tell them you’re ours runt

    S’important little pig

    If we’re bein’ nice enough to warn them what happens if they hurt you, you ought to let them know

    Tell them tell them tell them tell them

    Niki punched the air, “Ha! I won.”

    Wilbur gaped, “Wha- what’d they say about me?”

    Tommy giggled and Tubbo jeered.

    Our little pig

    Say it or we will

    Nobody likes the alternative so don't make it harder than it has to be little one

    Tell them

    Don’t hide or we can make sure they know anyways

    C’mon runt

    “Chat please, they know, okay? S’fine you don’t need to do all that.” Technoblade answered in piglin.

    Niki furrowed her brow, “What? Something wrong?”

    Ha no hiding now

    Blood for dishonesty

    EEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

    Tell or we will

    Tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell

    We're giving you the choice but don't make us push

    The boy paled slightly, “Fine, okay. Alright Chat, I'm sorry I'll tell them you don't need to be like that.” he sighed before turning to the others, “Chat is uh, very insistent that I let you all know- and really I don’t think it’s necessary, it’s really just dramatic, but uhm- well.”

    “What? Are they trying to snitch on you? That’s rough.” Tommy laughed lightly.

    Wilbur smiled vaguely, “I’m sure it’s fine Tech, what is it?”

    Technoblade hesitated just a moment too long for the voices patience, “Well, they sa--Little pig is ours, our runt first, you would not be the first victim to join the chorus, blood for traitors, he is not your blade, death for dishonor, blood for the blood god, we will kill you if we have to, the blood gods disciple is of the last don’t think we won’t protect him, don’t q-” the boy smacked his hands over his mouth and panted for a moment, catching his breath.

    Tubbo stared with a gaping mouth, failing to stutter out any words.

    “Oh-kay?” Niki muttered to herself.

    Wilbur snapped his mouth shut and breathed heavily through his nose.

    Tommy stared for a minute before blurting out loudly, “Huh, did the dead voices of a god just give us the shovel talk through the mouth of a fourteen year old?”

    Tubbo nodded, “I uh, I think so? Didn’t know they could uhm- didn’t think they could do that Techno. Often? Do they do that often?”

    The piglin hybrid winced and bit back a whine at the now splitting silence in his skull, “Uhm nope. They don’t usually do that ever, it uh, well it’s not easy and uh, they can only really do it sometimes?” He laughed self-deprecatingly, “I guess they didn’t trust me to really get the message across.”

    Wilbur laughed anxiously, “Yeah, uh, okay. Right, so just future reference, don’t be mean to you or else god will kill us? That’s a pretty fucking good shovel talk Tech, I’ll be honest with you.”

    “I mean the Blood God likes me a lot, but uh he prolly wouldn’t kill you himself? He’d probably just uhm- well. Just encourage me to do it?” he sighed heavily, “They’re pretty protective so y’know. But we don’t have to worry about that…” the boy rubbed his temples in mild agitation, the sudden silence after they took control was always disorienting.

    Niki nodded, “No for sure, like I wasn’t gonna make you a blade anyways but uhm, it’s nice to know they care about you too?”

    Techno flinched lightly at the wording, “Yup. So anyways, uhm they probably won’t do that again, or at least not for a long time so no worries there.”

    “So they don’t like us then?” Wilbur laughed hesitantly through the question.

    “Do you really wanna know what the thousands of people who can’t do anything but watch my life have to say? Like honestly?” Techno asked in disbelief.

    Wilbur started before flushing and shaking his head.

    Tommy cried out, “I wanna know! What’d they say! You should tell us every time they make fun of Wilbur!”

    Techno laughed, “Well, I guess just now they called him insecure, but uh earlier they called you insane too.”

    Tubbo barked out a laugh, “Do Tommy next!”

    “Nope, uh no? They’ll get too excited if I keep this up. Plus they tell me to stab him all the time so uh, pass?” Techno cut in immediately.

    Niki laughed loudly, “Alright, enough. Just uh, stick around for a bit Techno? We do want you around.”

    Chat gave a token effort to mutter, but they had exhausted themselves and only one managed a small whisper;

    Ha can’t avoid your emotions for long runt

    Technoblade sighed, “I guess if the voices in my head that call for blood didn’t get you to let this go then I might as well. So long as this all stays between us?”

    The others nodded and Tubbo cheered.

    “Stuck with us for life now!” Tommy shouted.

    Technoblade smiled lightly, “Yeah, guess so.”

[cosmicanger]

abuse by proxy trendy rn

A: “I’m also finding it wild how much people are happily signed up to the idea that their employer should be notified every time they misbehave outside of work. And I’m not talking people being bigoted/discriminatory, you really think if you ever upset someone your boss should know? Let’s say you get drunk on the weekend and make an ass of yourself and piss people off on the train, should you be pulled up in front of HR? Advocating for your employer to extend surveillance to your out-of-work activities is crazy. Many of us on social media wouldn’t survive it. “Those girls employers deserve to know that they’re mean bullies :)” you lot after sending death threats and exposing the home address of some random girls you saw in a 30 second TikTok.”

B: “i mean thats happening all the time though. we do have a digital footprint regardless. and typically it isnt in these instances and i think its a little wild that now is the time everyone wants to be up in arms about a d*xx*ng situation. a little... interesting. im not saying they deserved it. theyre shitty as hell. but... we've seen a lot of instances on twt alone of black folk specifically women, trans folk, etc be d*xx*d for literally doing WAYYYYYYYY less than this and some of yall was idle. weird NOW we all have opinions on limits. like i hate this for them. i bet they wont do that shit again tho. do i think they should lose they job for it? no. but have i seen yall not gaf when black trans women were getting doxxed for less than this? yes. so do i think this should surprise yall? no. and does it surprise me that you suddenly care now? no. bc you can all see yourselves as the victim and a lot of you can see yourselves as them girls too so ur all invested. lets all take a step back and find sum else 2 care about.”

C: “yeah on all sides i'm just like y'all are making this about cancel culture without seeing how whiteness informs your empathy for both parties cause i really feel like the girls who were doxxed will be okay”

B: “they will be! 9/10! it is not the same energy at all. based on all this sympathy somebody might give them girls a job if they lose em which i HIGHLY doubt. you only care cos you are able to view them victims from all angles. funny how That Works LMAO.”

C: “n all this was just sumn that never needed to be posted publicly and opened up for everyone's opinion like what ever happened to taking ur L and keeping it pushin?!”

B: “like i get wanting to talk abt it but why not just do a storytime 😭 cos now everybody just revealing what they wanted to write to they hs bullies and i get it but this isnt important in the grand scheme of things at all 😭”

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

me: yeah I used to identify as a pro shipper but I don’t anymore because im not seventeen anymore and realised fiction and reality is a complex issue that cannot be summed up in one or two buzzwords. both sides have really good and really bad people and points, which people on the other don’t realise because it’s weirdly encouraged to send harassment to people and that keeps an endless war going on.

yes, fiction can spread negative ideas and bad messaging, but most of the time it’s genuinely people who don’t know any better and they need education and not shaming. not every depiction is intended to be an endorsement, and there’s a massive disconnect between people who define shipping as simply neutrally finding a dynamic interesting and thinking it’s somewhat positive at least that leads to mass miscommunication. thinking critically about your interests is important and fun but it’s okay to like things in a mindless way. literally like 90% of this whole discourse could be solved if antis and pro shippers literally just talked to each other because this whole thing is primarily severe miscommunication between people saying “dark fic is fine and cool” and “you can spread harmful messaging through fiction and you probably shouldn’t” which are not mutually exclusive and shouldn’t be.

99% of people on both side are lovely people who are biased through having a bad experience with the other side because the discourse breeds extreme toxicity and the 1% of people who are dickheads take advantage of that and turn decent people into harassers and influence them to have bad takes. i've probably had shitty takes in the past when i was seventeen and i appreciate being told that but also people change.

this whole thing is pointless bullshit between two points that both vary from very based to fucking awful depending on the person arguing for them and it’s fucking stupid to get involved which is why i've stopped doing it because it’s literally the dumbest thing and i do not give a fuck. people need to realise this is a complex issue and it cannot be boiled down to approaches that don’t work when followed to absolutes.

also, writing rpf of minors that is sexual literally makes me sick and is genuinely an incredibly fucked up morally bad thing but the worst part of the communities that do it is the fact they’re literally full of grooming and very literal cp not like written stuff as in actual real pictures of real children and i don’t think that should be ignored and kids that escape from that deserve support and sympathy because they were probably groomed.

some people, for some reason: metaru is totally a pro shipper, totally a paedophile despite being seventeen when they identified with that term and totally thinks shipping rl minors is ok and I am going to harass their friends over this. people cannot change ever.

like, seriously, just harass me instead I wouldn’t give a shit about that hate me block me whatever just leave my friends alone please? this has been happening for MONTHS direct the shit into my inbox not theirs.

[helenazbmrskai]

Bad Omega, Sweet Omega JJK (M)

Pairing – Omega! Jeongguk x Reader

Genre – Werewolf AU, Smut, Angst, fluff, Omega Going Into Heat AU

Summary – [This year Jeongguk’s heat leads to unexpected discoveries. You always thought that Jeongguk hates your guts even though his wolf liked to cuddle you. Until you find yourself in a sticky situation in the bathroom while the pack members try to break down the door.]

Warnings – angst, jeongguk is a little feral at the beginning, he corners you and licks your neck, sexual tension, multiple sex scenes, scenting, kissing, lots of licks, dom! jeongguk but also sub! jeongguk he switches but mostly dom gukie I think (yeah I don't know what happened to me guys my hand slipped), unprotected vaginal sex, hair pulling, making out, bondage (guk is tied up), werewolf heat sex, dirty talk, jeongguk is needy, overstimulation, face sitting, oral (both receiving), fingering, blowjob, handjob, body worship, tongue fucking, multiple orgasms, knotting, raw penetration, possessive guk, big dick guk, size kink (because it's me), edging, rough-(ish) fucking, creampie(s),  scent kink, biting/marking (one bite to be exact and it's not gukie), implied cockwarming, period sex (!), guk is your personal heater, cuddles, aftercare, shower sex, confessions, lovemaking, breast play, biting kink, slow fucking

Word Count – (10k)

Menu: Masterlist l Be part of my permanent taglist to recieve a notification when I upload a new fic or send an ask!

⤷ Part of Bad and Sweet Trilogy

”I got the chains. Can I come in?” You whisper-yell through the door, pacing around the backyard when no one answers even though you knocked twice and called every pack member except for one who you know won’t reply. It seems like everyone is occupied for some reason. Unsure if you should drop it off and book it or wait for someone to reply to your text messages you start chewing on your lower lip anxiously.

You don’t know what to do. After weighing your options you choose the latter and take another peek at your device. You came this far so you shouldn’t give up now. It’s literally a life and death situation you can’t let them down.

You know they’re home, they wouldn’t let poor Jeongguk be alone when he’s in heat.

It’s your wellbeing that you’re kinda worried about. They said that an omega in heat can smell you even from a mile and while you were never particularly good at math even you know that the numbers are not in your favour so close to the packhouse.

You feel like a burglar looking around every two seconds to make sure no one sees you when you in reality are checking out the place for threats. It’s eerily quiet outside.

To be honest, this is not how you planned to spend your weekend. You’re sure the girl who checked you out at the store thinks that you’re into some kinky BDSM shit or worse. She thinks you’re some nasty kidnapper or a serial killer!

You could feel it in her stare that she was judging you hard as she ringed up all those chains and heavy locks that Namjoon asked you to bring to replace the broken ones. You can’t exactly say you buy them because you’re friends with a bunch of werewolves.

Well at least she didn’t dial the cops as soon as you stepped out, that’s something to be grateful for.

You can’t even imagine how bad his heat is this time considering that he ripped two chains and the spare one! And now that you can hear the growls and grunts coming from upstairs you know that the door is hanging by a thread as well to keep him locked away.

Now you understand why Namjoon asked you to bring the chains asap. Damn, omegas are hard to handle. It must be even harder on Jeongguk. The boy is a muscle pig.

You really shouldn’t be here right now but you’re the only one available as Jimin’s and Taehyung’s girlfriends are busy with a family reunion or something along the lines like that.

You admit that you’re guilty of not listening to their ranting as you were busy ogling at Jeongguk shirtless. Who can blame you though? He was working out and sweating.

There isn’t a woman on this planet who could have looked away respectfully when he’s such a snack.

Besides the point. They can’t just ask someone considering that not many of their friends know about their family’s secret. So it really comes down to you only.

Finally, you hear someone unlock the door that grabs your attention and gets you out of your daydreaming.

”Did you get it?” Taehyung asks through the creak, you can only see his eyes through the slit of the door. Poor guy looks exhausted which makes you worry your lip even more at the sight. He didn’t open the front door wider for you. Probably to keep your scent outside. Normally you would roll your eyes and make some remarks but this time you just nod and point at your backpack where everything is.

Now’s not the time to joke about how that sounded like you’re about to hook him up with some good weed.

You wonder where everyone is as the house gets eerily quiet for a minute, with no grunts or heavy panting to disturb the silence. Taehyung needs to open the door wider for you to pass him the bag and that’s when you hear it. There’s a bang that awfully sounds like a door just got yeeted off the doorframe upstairs and some panicked yells follow the sounds of heavy breathing and even heavier footsteps. They yell Jeongguk’s name that screams trouble to you.

You spoke too soon. You’re fucked.

Your eyes widen when Jeongguk appears sweaty and disoriented with two pack members in tow trying to get a hold of him but with little to no success. Taehyung grabs you by the shoulder on impulse. He immediately shuts the door behind you, you hear as the lock turns.

Your heart is beating so fast that you’re afraid it will break free from your ribcage. You keep looking between the door and the guys as panic settles in. What do you do now?

”What are you doing?! Why did you lock me in too?” You whisper the words close to Taehyung’s ears while you can’t keep your eyes off Jeongguk who is struggling to break free from Jimin’s and Yoongi’s hold. Taehyung pulls you behind him protectively with an apologetic smile on his face.

”Sorry but he saw you. He wouldn’t let you go now and we need to keep him inside the house.” It makes sense (you’re a woman) but it doesn’t mean you’re any less nervous to be here. He could tear you limb by limb or fuck you till you’re unable to even stand upright. Either way, it would be humiliating if Jeongguk jumped your bones in front of his pack members. A chilled shiver runs down your spine at the thought.

You heard stories of a werewolf’s heat from the girlfriends but Jimin is a beta and Taehyung is an alpha.

Jeongguk however is an omega and his heat is very different from what you heard from the boys.

Their wolf comes out so strongly that they can’t think clearly. You remember Hoseok mentioning it to you that when an omega’s heat hits he can’t control his urges and it doesn’t matter in the heat of the moment who is there all he can think about is breeding his partner. It doesn’t matter that normally Jeongguk couldn’t even keep eye contact with you for more than five seconds before he has to look away. If you come across him while he’s in this state he will not hesitate to bend you backwards and fuck you that makes a different kind of shudder run down your spine.

The closest room where you could hide is in the bathroom on your right. Taehyung nudges you in that direction while he joins the two boys to help out, they’re relieved that he has the chains. But their relive it’s short lived though when Jeongguk somehow twists his hands out of their hold and grabs the door handle before you could close it.

You can barely hear their yells through the door and the rattle of the knob as you are now, face to face with Jeongguk and his glowing gold eyes laced with hunger. You could see the sweat collecting along his hairline but he still smells oh so nice, inhaling his manly scent makes you dizzy.

All you can hear is the blood rushing through your ears making everything sound like you’re underwater as you watch his face contort into a painful grimace.

You hold your breath when he gets close enough that you can feel his shaky exhale of breath on your face. Too close for comfort but you’re afraid to move in case it sets him off. He didn’t do anything yet and you’re not sure when they will be able to open the door so you refrain from making any sudden movements.

”J-Jeongguk, w-wait a minute!” You step back until your back collies with the cold tiles of the bathroom wall when he moves. You spoke too soon again. The cold sensation makes goosebumps appear on your skin as you shudder. Nowhere to go now he cages you between his muscular arms on either side of your waist. He’s shirtless you can’t help but look at his defined stomach and admire his muscles flexing with the motion of holding you between them.

This is not the right time to ogle at his fit body but you’re only woman while he’s a very attractive species of man right in front of your eyes. Heat or not. You should be scared shitless but weirdly, you don’t really feel that you’re in danger even when he’s standing this close to you.

He’s the youngest in his pack but definitely the most packing in terms of muscles. Any other day you wouldn’t think even for a moment that the sweet Gukie can be intimidating and make you shake in your boots.

What’s even crazier than that is that you’re not that scared to stand this close to him. Something in his eyes tells you that he won’t hurt you. He looks feral but there’s this tenderness in his eyes only reserved for your gaze to pick up on.

You don’t know if you should believe your instincts. You still jump when he ducks his face lower and licks the sweat off your cheek, startling you. He drags the wet muscle down your jaw licking the expanse of your skin as if you’re the tastiest ice cream on a sunny day.

”D-Don’t hurt me!” You yelp when you feel his tongue lave on your pulse point. There’s no way he can’t smell the fear on you as he keeps nibbling on your earlobe. He licks your entire neck, you can feel his sticky saliva coat your skin.

You’re so shocked that you barely register his hard on pressing to your stomach until he rolls his hips into you. His fingers dig into the dip of your hips to keep you in place.

He fucking whimpers at the contact that makes you feel a colourful palette of emotions. You let out a gasp of surprise that emits a deep growl from within his chest at the sound nothing like the sweet mewl he let out not too long ago.

The door bursts open the moment Jeongguk’s hand moves to hold your waist with who knows what kind of intention in mind and three werewolves are pulling him out of the room before you could blink twice. Everything happens so fast that your human senses are unable to keep up.

Your heart clenches painfully inside your ribcage as you hear him mewl and beg for them to let him go. He was so quiet until now. Taehyung is next to you inspecting your body for any injuries but you shake your head to reassure him that all your limbs are intact. Taehyung can smell Jeongguk's scent on you as his saliva started to dry on your neck. You’re more than fine just a little shell shocked.

”I’m fine. H-He just licked my neck.” Automatically your hand comes up to feel your neck except for the saliva that transferred on your fingers from your skin – there are no marks. He didn’t bite you or hurt you. Jeongguk is normally so shy and sweet. You never saw him acting this animalistic before. The sounds he made mere minutes ago left you hot and bothered and you’re glad no one mentions the change in your scent.

The boys made sure the new chains will hold on so you could open the bathroom door again. You hear his whiny voice, he’s telling the boys something but it’s too far away that your brain can’t make out the words only his sorrowful whimpers that pulls on your heartstrings. Jin rubs your arms to comfort you misjudging your distress but you’re too far away in your mind to register his soothing words in your ears.

Yoongi is the first one to come down, his face tells you nothing so you immediately ask him if he’s alright. If Jeongguk is alright. He then looks at you. His expression renders everyone speechless in the room. Yoongi looks deep in thought for a second.

”We have a big problem.” There’s dead silence inside the kitchen as everyone gathers around the table anticipating Yoongi’s elaboration on the subject. You sit between Jimin and Hoseok when Yoongi speaks up again. You know something is wrong when he only looks at you and he seems apologetic for some unknown reason.

”Jeongguk thinks Y/N is his mate.” If you were drinking something you sure would have spit it out by now. This is not what you were expecting your weekend to look like. Far from it. What kind of nonsense is this. Everyone around you is shocked, Taehyung is the first one to get his thoughts together and ask his hyung to repeat that.

”But we know Y/N for years and he never mentioned it once! Are you sure it’s not just his heat talking to get laid?” You can understand why Jimin would be sceptical. It’s not like there were many times where you and Jeongguk spent time alone without the guys if anything it always seemed like that he’s been avoiding you as much as he could.

This is a serious matter wolves don’t just go around calling just anyone their mate though.

It’s not something that happens overnight either. If you’re really his mate that means that he knew it for years! You don’t want to go there yet without a real confirmation but it would at least make sense why he was so shy around you. It’s rare for humans to be mated to werewolves but what’s even rarer is an omega having a human mate. It’s nature’s doing that omegas are mated to alphas 99.9% of the time and Jeongguk calling you his mate would make you the rare 0.1%.

”Even if we’re in heat we don’t claim someone is our mate when it’s not confirmed by our wolves. You know that as well as us, Jimin. He’s not coherent enough to come up with a lie, all we say and do during this time, it’s the truth. It’s a misconception that we say anything just to get laid.” Taehyung shifts from Jimin to you to explain and you nod. Understanding. Still a little out of it as you try to process this new information.

You’re Jeongguk’s mate. It should make you feel weirded out. But you can’t lie to yourself. You occasionally thought about Jeongguk as more than a friend, daydreaming about things involving him either innocently or not. Who do you try to deceive? It happens more than just a few times. The draw you always felt towards him makes perfect sense now that you know you’ve been fated to be together.

It was obvious that you had some kind of effect on him even before today as he always became tongue-tied as soon as you appeared in his peripheral. Realisation draws upon you that even when you meet up with the boys your eyes are searching for his before you greet anyone else.

You assumed that he’s not so fond of you when in reality it was the opposite really. You could also see why he didn’t want to tell you. It’s rare that his mate is a human. You hope that he’s not ashamed of you though. You might not be an alpha but you’re still his.

”What do we do now? I don’t understand why it’s bad news. I mean it’s sudden but-” You gulp avoiding everyone’s eyes before you continue. ”It’s n-not like I’m opposed to the idea.”

Yoongi snorts at my bashful state giving my shoulder a little squeeze of reassurance before the topic shifts. It’s evident that you had the biggest crush on Jeongguk since forever. Everyone in the pack knew about it except for Jeongguk.

”We told you that omegas are different right?” You nod, they talked about a few differences between their pack dynamics and how their heats differ from each other’s but you don’t know that much to be completely honest. It felt invasive on your part so you only listened when they offered to talk about it, you never outright asked.

”It’s painful to go through our heat without a mate but for an omega-” Taehyung trails off, unsure if it’s the best to tell you considering that it will put you in a place where a hard decision needs to be made by you and knowing you, you will want to help even though you’re not sure about it yourself.

”It will take a toll on his health sooner or later and now that he made skin to skin contact and inhaled your scent he can’t possibly think about anything else but to mate you. I don’t know if his body can handle his rut without you this time.”

You vividly remember how Jeongguk begged the boys to let him go, how he cried in agony when they dragged him away from you. He looked completely disoriented. At first, you thought that it’s impossible for his eyes to only focus while looking at you but now it doesn’t seem too far fetched. Maybe all he could see and focus on were you in front of him but so far away while his mind was full of unquenched lust and you’re the object of his desires.

”I can help him.” Their shoulders visibly relax after you offer. It must be hard for them to see their youngest suffer alone like that but they don’t want to force you either as you’re their friend as well. You can’t blame them for wanting the best for him. It seems like things will be a little backwards in your relationship but Jeongguk is not a normal guy either and you shouldn’t be coy now for both of your sakes.

You can picture how mortified he will look once the fog disappears from his mind and realises what happened. He will probably blush like crazy avoiding eye contact like always.

You can’t wait to see that. You just hope things will turn out well in the end.

”Can you uh, in the meantime go somewhere else? I would feel better if no one heard us- you know.” The boys coo as they see the blush spread across your cheeks.

They tease you a little but eventually agree to leave the house until Jeongguk’s heat passes.

Taehyung is reluctant at first he tries to convince you to have one of the boys stay just in case something happens but you reject the idea. The new chains should hold and you don’t think Jeongguk will hurt you. He could have, in the bathroom but he didn’t.

You promise to be careful.

”Just one more thing you need to know before we leave.” Jimin catches you by your sleeve pulling you back to get some distance between you and the boys who pack a few things before they leave. You’re confused why he suddenly asked you to talk to him privately.

”Just a few tips as a wolf.” Jimin winks and you look away to hide your embarrassment.

”I suggest you take a long shower before you go into his room, he will not like you smell like us. It would be even better if you could wear something of his so your scents would mix.”

He takes a whiff of air and chuckles. ”Not that I can’t smell him on you.” Your eyes widen before you look away and blush.

”It makes sense I guess. Anything else I should know?” You push your embarrassment to the side as you ask him. Jimin is not awkward about it at all it’s natural for them to go into heat and talk about this stuff so it’s time that you get yourself together. You need to know everything if you want to help Jeongguk through it properly.

”You know that omegas are normally mated to alphas. It’s a natural instinct to please our mate but it’s different from how we act since we’re more of the dominant side.”

”I’m not an alpha though. This will make a huge difference, isn’t it? What should I do, I’m just a human.” You kind of panic that you might not be able to please him, give him what he wants and craves. What if you can’t help him through his heat because you’re not a wolf? Jimin places a reassuring hand on your head and smiles to soothe your nerves.

”To please his wolf you need to think like an alpha Y/N. Make him submit to you. It doesn’t matter that you’re not a wolf you’re his mate, it doesn’t change his instincts to respond to your advances. He will want you to take control and tell him what to do. An omega only thinks about how to please their mate otherwise he will be anxious and think that you don’t want him or he’s doing something wrong.”

”Tell him what to do, got it.” You smile at him, feeling a little bit more confident than before and he returns your smile nodding.

��Tell him to prep you well too, he won’t be able to hold back his knot and it will be too painful if you’re not stretched.” You never thought that a day will come when you talk about sex with Jimin, you’re getting shy again as you listen to his explicit advice on how to handle an omega in heat.

”Also don’t tell him that I told you but he likes to be called a good boy.” Jimin winks.

”Maybe you should call Tae’s fiancé she can tell you some good advice as a human mate.” He adds as an afterthought before he leaves with the others.

The living room gets quiet as they gather their stuff and leave, you stand there for a moment before you sprung to action. Thinking about that Jeongguk must be in so much pain, it’s been a while since they dragged him back upstairs so you shouldn’t keep him waiting too long.

You need a shower to get ready to see him. You take Jimin’s offer and take your time scrubbing your body with the products you find inside his bathroom and dress up in his long shirt with your underwear underneath. Not wasting time to get fully dressed as it will come off soon enough, hopefully. You’re excited but a little nervous too.

Jeongguk is a handsome wolf and a true sweetheart deep down behind his shy doe eyes.

It seems surreal that he choose you as his mate but you wish he would have told you in better circumstances. Or told you at all considering that he blurted it out in the heat of the moment to his hyungs.

You didn’t know what to expect when you opened the door. But to see his chained form curled in on himself on a single mattress on the ground without a bed frame does things to you. The restraints are probably for precaution as you heard they break them frequently out of frustration.

Remembering the advice from Jimin you try to appear as someone confident when you approach him. Deep breath. You got this.

Order him around, please his wolf by praising him – you give yourself a silent pep talk on your way to his body laying on the ground. You can do that. It’s Jeongguk, your sweet omega that happens to be your mate. It doesn’t matter that you only found out mere hours ago.

He could smell you the minute you opened the door and stepped in. But he refuses to look at you as he makes himself appear smaller to chase away the painful throb of his erection that sends heatwaves through his body now that your sweet scent is potent in the air. Inhaling it strongly from the source makes his head foggy.

He couldn’t get the taste of your skin out of his head since he got to experience it in the bathroom. He wants to lick every crevice of your body until you’re drenched in his scent. It felt so right to push your body flush against him.

You’re confused when he pulls away from your touch, he’s shaking. You have your eyebrows in a deep furrow as you try to figure out what’s wrong. He mewls when you touch his warm skin, he’s burning up. He’s deeper in his heat than you originally thought.

”Look at me.” You hold him by his biceps as you turn him around to face you. Your voice is gentle and coaxing.

He could easily outpower you with his supernatural strength but instead, he lets you move him around as you please and when your eyes meet with his needy darkened pupils you have to bite your lips to hold back a frustrated groan.

Jeongguk is so pretty. You feel guilty that you get to ogle at his body when he’s clearly feeling unwell. Entirely under the spell of his heat. He’ll definitely be the death of you in all of his sweaty glory. He looks so submissive at this moment.  

Maybe the boys were right about one thing. The moon goddess never makes mistakes.

You naturally like submissive partners you have more experience with them so dominating a pretty wolf in heat should be a piece of cake. You can’t believe that you are lucky enough to bag a handsome boy like Jeon Jeongguk.

”I’m here Gukie you don’t have to suffer anymore. I’ll help you.” You kiss his cheek then his nose. Lastly, you place a kiss directly on his chapped lips. Jeongguk moans when he feels your mouth on him. He shyly reciprocates he moves in tandem with you but the sweet lip locking turns greedier when you decide to pull on his hair. His tongue swipes over your lower lip asking for permission that you give him without question.

You suck his tongue into your mouth while your hands eagerly map out his torso.

The sound of the chains grow louder in your ears as he tries to roam your body but the restrains doesn’t let him touch you like he desperately wants to. He lets out a frustrated huff when you kiss along the line of his jaw. As an attempt to make him feel better you catch his wrists to position them above his head.

Your fingers intertwine with his in a loving gesture as you capture his lips in a slow kiss full of tongue and passion surging through your veins. Not feeling close enough you straddle his hips. His sounds grow louder as you begin grinding down on his prominent erection.

”Y- Y/N.” Your name leaves his kiss swollen lips like a mantra when you stand. The protest dies on his tongue when he sees you undress. There’s a flesh of recognition you catch in his eyes. He realises that you’ve been wearing his shirt and now you’re taking it off in front of him. Standing in your blue panties and nothing else.

You inhale sharply when Jeongguk kneels, his hand is on your calf as he inhales deeply nosing along your left thigh.

”Wanna taste you. Ugh, you smell so nice. Can I bury my face in your cunt? Please? Can I?”

You gulp down the pent up saliva in your mouth. You never in a million years had thought that he’ll beg to eat you out, saying such explicit things with no shame.

Your panties are soaked with your arousal after kissing Jeongguk and making out with him for a while. You wonder how your body will react when his lips are wrapped around other parts of your body. The colour where it conceals your centre the material turned to a darker blue, the sight makes the wolf salivate.

Feigning your confidence you push at his chest, gently laying him down flat on the mattress. His eyes light up like Christmas lights when he catches what you’re trying to do.

”Yes, yes! Please sit on my face. I want to lick you all clean. I won’t waste a drop I swear. I’ll make you cum on my tongue until your legs are shaking. My mate’s sweet cunt deserves to be licked clean. Hmp-!” You waste no time in positioning your legs on either side of his face. His dirty mouth manages to rile you up enough that when your pussy hovers over his eager face your centre is dripping. The chains leave him enough space to grip your thighs with his firm hands pulling you down until he can reach you to make the first lick to your cunt.

Your spine immediately arches as he buries his face between your sticky folds. The tip of his nose rubs against your clit as his breath fans across your sex teasing you. He’s inhaling your heady aroma until he can’t hold back anymore and dives in with a long lick. His moan is guttural and animalistic as he enjoys your taste.

His eyes are closed tightly and there’s a furrow to his brows. You recognize the expression he makes when he eats something delicious and your face burns with embarrassment.

Your cunt throbs the more Jeongguk turns you on with his eagerness. But the shy feeling doesn’t last long since he makes sure you can’t think about anything else.

The only thoughts you’re allowed to have is how the visual of his face drenched in your arousal could bring you alone close to the edge. A close second to how his swollen lips and vigorous tongue is about to send you over to the gates of heaven.

His jaw works hard as he slurps loudly, sucking on your pink clit Jeongguk is fuelled by the shameless moans that you bless his ears with – with each stroke of his tongue. He doesn’t relent until your legs are shaking and about to close around his head if it weren’t for his tight grip on your thighs you might have crushed him. He keeps fucking you with his tongue his moans are almost louder than yours and the vibrations it sends to your core is the last push you needed to come undone.

Jeongguk lets you move your hips as you enjoy the last waves of your orgasm. He keeps still under you with his tongue out while you grind down on his face, whimpering as the overstimulation settles in. Your legs are shaking wildly as you try to get down from your high. It doesn’t help how Jeongguk keeps flicking his tongue from your clit to your convulsing hole as he cleans you of any remains of your orgasm.

Jeongguk sends you a wolfish smile, satisfied to see you have a hard time catching your breath. He places a calming peck to your inner thigh before he lets you go and plop down on your ass next to him. Jeongguk’s face shines with your cum he cheekily licks his lips as his eyes stray from your face to your cunt that glistens in the lamplight. The wolf can smell the sweetness of your cum and his saliva mixed in. His cock is rock hard as he tries to wait till you gather yourself.

Your pleasure and comfort is his first priority even though he’s straining every muscle in his body to keep himself from ramming into your spent cunt and mark his territory by cumming inside your fertile pussy. His cock throbs painfully as he imagines how tight you’ll be around him as he penetrates you with his wide cockhead. He’ll fuck you raw and cum inside. He’ll knot you and paint your walls white to make sure every wolf and man out there knows that you belong to him.

You have no idea what Jeongguk’s been thinking about while you were collecting yourself after the intense orgasm he coaxed from you but judging by the stare he gives you it must be deliciously sinful.

Your gaze is fixed on his bulge, it seems painful so you palm him over his slacks trying to return the favour but Jeongguk rips your hand away from his clothed erection.

You’re startled at how roughly he tore your hand away from him that makes you look away in shame.

Maybe you read into his actions wrong and he finds your touch repulsive somehow. His wolf sensing your negative emotions Jeongguk pulls you to him by a hand on the back of your neck and plants a messy kiss on your lips. You can taste yourself on his tongue. You’re still confused by his previous outburst but you try again. Inching closer to the tent in his pants and rub the heel of your palm over his entire length.

Jeongguk breaks the kiss to whimper into your neck. His hands find leverage on your shoulders as you massage his cock over his clothes. Judging by the outline, his dick is massive not only in grith but long enough to fill you up and curve just where your pleasure spot is.

”Stop.” Jeongguk grips your hand when it tries to slide under the material of his pants. ”I don’t wanna waste any of my seed. My cum belongs to be spurt deep in your pussy.”

”But- I want to taste you too.” You don’t relent this time. Knowing that you’re stubborn if you want something Jeongguk lets go of your hand and helps you by lifting his hip so you can get him out of his clothes. He’s so big. You lick your lips, mesmerised how your grip can hardly wrap around his base.

Jeongguk watches you with half-lidded eyes. He lets you take care of him slipping back to submission as you show him the dominance that his wolf recognises with delight.

Your fingers work his shaft like magic, his precum aids an easy glide. You don’t need to use your spit to make his cock slippery as your hands can set a faster pace without any resistance. ”Your cock is so wet Gukie. Does eating my pussy turned you on this much?”

You twist your fingers skillfully, dragging the sensitive skin up and down until he chants your name between heavy pants. He chokes on his moan when you engulf the tip of his cock in your mouth without warning, tasting him for the first time.

”Yes! Hmmph- Y/N. You’re so delicious. I want your taste on my tongue forever.” You hum around his cock, pleased by his answer. Your tongue rolls around the head collecting the bead of precum you reach lower following the throbbing vein down his shaft and then you suck. Jeongguk throws his head back and mewls.

”I’ll cum! Please Y/N stop or I’ll c-cum down your throat! Fuck, please I can’t t-take it. Your mouth is so w-warm and wet.” You continue stroking his cock as you pay most of your attention to his sensitive cockhead. But right before he could tip over the edge you pull away. Ripping the orgasm from him that it’s just out of his reach.

Remembering the piece of advice from Jimin you reluctantly pull away and settle down on your back again. You spread your legs wide and beckon Jeongguk to come closer. He does so eagerly following your body on all fours until he hovers above you.

You really want to skip this part as he managed to rile you up enough to drown in your arousal you remember that his knot is no joke. If you don’t want to feel like you’re being ripped in half you need a little stretch before you let him fuck you.

You share a heated kiss that turns slopy real soon, your moans interrupting the flow of your intertwined tongues as Jeongguk ruts his bare cock along your folds.

”Need your fingers or your huge cock won’t fit. We can’t have that won’t we?”

You run your hands through Jeongguk’s sweaty hair, you need something to focus on to keep yourself to the plan when his cock catches onto your clit each time he thrust back and forth. You can tell from his desperate rutting that he wants that too but decides to listen to you and guide his long fingers to your fluttering opening.

You’re glad to have something in you even though it’s not as good as his cock would feel. His fingers are thick and long and he certainly knows how to use them as you feel another orgasm approach you all too soon. His pace is ruthless as he thrust his digits in and out. He mainly focuses on stretching you as he adds a third finger but can’t help himself as he dips down to latch his mouth onto your sensitive clit.

He doesn’t hear you when you tell him to stop before he could send you over the edge again. Your taste invades his senses – you can see how his eyes turn gold whilst his fingers fuck you mercilessly until you’re cumming around them.

Jeongguk is insatiable or maybe it’s the wolf in him that encourages him to wreak you. His wolf won’t be satisfied until your legs shake like jelly and your eyes are filled with tears of pleasure.

You focus on his flexing biceps as he keeps his full body weight above you for a moment. His cock finally sinks into your heat that makes your eyes roll to the back of your head in overstimulation.

Jeongguk’s cock fills you up to the brim, slides home in your wet cunt with ease. It would be surprising if it wasn’t thinking back to the long foreplay that he subjected you to. Jeongguk’s stamina and self control is no joke but knowing that he kept a huge secret from you for all these years tells you that he had time to practice.

He’ll have to do a lot of making up to you but right now you just enjoy the sharp thrust of his hips. The bliss that shows on his face how heavenly your pussy stretches around his grith is worths more than all the money in the world. Knowing that you’re the source of that pleasure. His hands are all over your body. Kneading your breasts, feeling up your tummy where he can feel the outline of his cock move in and out.

Wants to dive deeper and make your moan sound higher as the airy sounds you let out fill his wolf with pride. He imagined this too many times that his self control is slowly slipping from his fingertips as he thrust harder drilling you into the mattress until he feels the base of his cock swell. Letting him know that he’s getting close.

Jeongguk draws tight circles with the tip of his thumb to coax one more orgasm out of you before he releases.

He makes you cum for the third time tonight. The pleasure is numbing as you start to feel his knot enlarge plugging your pussy up tightly so his cum doesn’t spill.

You don’t feel the pain from his knot as you blackout for a moment or two from the exhaustion that overwhelms your sore muscles when your body realises that Jeongguk is finally done with you. The gold hue is slowly vanishing from his doe eyes as you both bask in the afterglow. His face is securely tucked between your breasts cushioning his head from either side. Sweat and cum is everywhere as Jeongguk rolls onto his back once his knot ebbs away.

There’s a charged silence between you as you both try to regain your breaths.

You relax when Jeongguk pulls you into his arms he doesn’t care that you’re both gross and sweaty. He happily noses along your neck, smelling that his scent is all over you.

You release him from his chains knowing that he’ll be more in control now that he knotted before you succumb to sleep. You decide it’s enough reassurance for now as you soon drift off from exhaustion.

The next couple of days are intense. He wakes you up by slipping inside your spent count he whines into your ear when you don’t react to his advances at first.

You’re still sleepy and worn out but he manages to coax your moans out with his precise thrusts against your sweet spot. He shoots another load in you then goes back to sleep not bothering with slipping out as he cages you between his arms.

Jeongguk doesn’t let you out of his sight until his heat passes on the third day. But before that, he fucks you on every surface of the room, against the wall, with your ass up in the air bend over the dresser. From behind on all fours on the mattress.

By the time he’s knocked out you’re sore everywhere and you barely get yourself to walk a few metres to the bathroom for a well deserved clean up. You grab Jeongguk’s clothes from the dryer and set out a fresh pair for him to change into when he wakes up.

It gets easier to move around after you get used to a slight ache between your legs so you start on breakfast. You help yourself to two servings, making sure that you’re not eating too fast to avoid throwing up. Helping Jeongguk out with his heat took out everything of you, you no longer question why Taehyung and Jimin’s partners need a week to recover and feel like a human being again.

You can hear Jeongguk’s feet pad down the stairs, he sends you a bashful smile when your eyes meet. It’s awkward as you don’t know where you stand with him right now. During his heat, you had no time or the energy to discuss the elephant in the room but you can’t avoid the topic any longer. You refuse to pretend like nothing happened either. Your heart wouldn’t be able to take it.

”Were you ever planning to tell me?” It’s you who speaks first. Jeongguk avoids your eyes at all costs that speak more than any of his words could. It’s probably the exhaustion catching up to you after the intense fucking but your eyes fill up with tears.

Jeongguk panics when he sees the first roll of your tears slide down your cheeks. He’s about to say something when the front door opens and voices start to filter through the living room. They probably got your text that his heat is over. Still in his clothes, you stand up and walk to the front door leaving a panicking Jeongguk behind.

”Call me if you finally have something to say otherwise don’t bother.” You say it to the boy behind your back. Your voice is weak and Jeongguk wants to wrap his hands around you and tell you how much you mean to him. How sorry he is.

Instead, he watches you walk out. The boys look behind you they exchange a confused gaze before they jab Jeongguk for answers. It seemed like you didn’t even hear them say hello to you as you walked out. They could tell that you looked like you were about to ugly cry.

Jeongguk has to deal with six angry brothers as they all give him the stink eye for hurting you. He got several comments during the week about how he should get his head out of his ass and man up. For the record, Jeongguk knows that he needs to apologise to you sooner or later.

This is not how he expected his heat to go. He was dead set at spending it alone this year like every other year before but then he smelled you. You smelled so tempting so delicious. If he closes his eyes he could still remember how you tasted when you sat on his face. The reason why he kept it a secret from you is stupid now that he thinks about it. He ruined his every chance at being with you by not telling you about the mate bond that he could sense from the very beginning.

You had a boyfriend at the time you got introduced to the boys. You were Taehyung’s friend first but when you accidentally discovered that he’s a werewolf you joined the gang.

Jimin and Taehyung’s girlfriend immediately took a liking to you, you seemed to fit in with them perfectly. It wasn’t even a full year after that you finally broke up with your boyfriend but then he didn’t know how to bring it up with you.

He avoided you for at least half of the year after you joined it would have been weird if he suddenly started to act different around you. He dug his own grave there with his boundaries.

He kept waiting for the right time until it blew up in his face and now you’re hurt. You haven’t been visiting and the boys made sure that Jeongguk knew it’s because of him. They had a whole meeting addressing the issue. Jeongguk had to tell them everything and while they were still mad at him they could also see where he’s coming from.

After they heard Jeongguk’s side of the story they tried to spam your text messages.

All of them encouraged you to reach out and talk it out with the young werewolf but you were always a stubborn one. You told Jeongguk that if he wants to tell you something then he has to reach out first when you left the packhouse that day.

You initiated the first talk and he didn’t even say anything. Sure the boys interrupted you but he didn’t look like he was going to speak anytime soon. The girls came over to cheer you up. You couldn’t say no to wine and chicken. They told you that they gave a piece of their mind when they saw Jeongguk.

You didn’t like to hear how he has been moping around the house after you left. A part of you thinks that he deserves it but another part is still in love with him. You don’t like to see him sad.

He’s a big eater but the boys told you over text that he skips meals and locks himself up in his room instead of hanging out with them. It’s clear they try to butter you up and reach out first.

After the first month, you begin to lose hope that Jeongguk will ever reach out to you.

What’s worse is that you really miss him. You miss his smile, his adorable doe eyes that he keeps avoiding you with, how he works out in the morning. His laugh, everything about him is perfect. In your eyes anyways and today you’re in a particularly shitty mood.

You try to distract yourself from your period cramps by watching some show on Netflix but you can barely concentrate on the plot. A knock on the door interrupts you but you pay it no mind it’s probably one of the boys or your girlfriends checking up on you so you yell that they can come in.

You’re in no shape to get up as a particularly hard cramp makes you cringe and fold your body in half from the pain.

”Are you alright?” Your eyes shoot open when you hear his voice. He was the last person that you thought would visit and while you’re on your period nonetheless.

”Fine. It’s just that time of the month.” You grit out. Your hair is a mess and you’re in your least appealing clothes but Jeongguk still thinks that you’re beautiful. He can smell the iron in the air but it doesn’t disgust him he’s more worried about you in pain.

”What do you think you’re doing?” Your bewilderment is showing but you let Jeongguk manoeuvre your body as he pleases. He lets your head down to rest against his thighs as he sits. One hand is rubbing your tummy while the other reaches for the remote to choose another movie. You can’t lie this position is very comfortable and thanks to his werewolf genes he’s like a living furnace. His hand is so warm against your stomach that you can already feel the pain ebbing.

”I don’t like to see you in pain.” You didn’t expect an answer like that. Jeongguk looks at his hand laying on your stomach, his hands are big he could cover most of it. Fuck. Why do you have to be horny while you’re on your period? This is not the time to remember how good his tongue felt or how deep his cock- ok you’re not going down that road. You have to remember that Jeongguk can fucking smell your arousal.

You were supposed to be still mad at him and not cuddling on your couch when he haven’t reached out for a full month after he fucked you to the moon and back! He lied to you!

”I’m not in the mood for your games Jeongguk. If you have nothing to say then please leave.” It takes everything in you to move away from the comfortable position. As soon as his hand leaves your stomach the pain comes back but you try to not show your discomfort.

You have your back to him as you sit up. You expect him to do as you said. Leave. But he surprises you by hugging you from behind. Your back is firmly pushed against his chest you could hear his heart hammer around in his chest as if he’s nervous.

You have no idea how nervous he is. He’s here to apologise and maybe mend what can still be fixed between you but he’s afraid he’ll say all the wrong things again. The past month was hell. He watched Jimin and Taehyung being all lovely dovely with their mates and a deep longing settled into his heart.

He wants that with you too. Taehyung could see how the younger boy has been struggling so he decided to sit down and talk to him. Taehyung knows well how it feels to want your mate that’s so close but still out of reach. He has been in love with his best friend for a long time. Their situation is somewhat similar as Taehyung confessed when his heat kicked in. His mate reacted differently but the situation was different and Jeongguk was foolish enough to let you walk out that door.

Jeongguk realised that his hyung is right. He can’t be sure that you won’t forgive him. He has to try and try some more until you give in. Jeongguk swears that he’ll treat you right. He thanked Taehyung for his advice and drove to your place. He found you on the couch with a thick wool blanket draped around your shoulders and a pained expression etched into your beautiful features.

Even before he asked what was wrong he could smell your period blood. Your temperature rises and your heart rate quickens he knows all the signs. He doesn’t know what to say or how to start so he decides he’ll try to show you with his actions.

It seems to backfire though as you pull away.

”I’m sorry.” It’s the first thing that comes out as he presses himself against you, his arms are wrapped around you tightly – afraid that you’ll slip through his fingers if he lets go.

”For what?” You try not to sound too hopeful. Your heart is beating as fast as his. He could hear it and it calms him down. Knowing that he’s not the only one nervous.

Jeongguk takes it as a sign to continue when you place your hand on his that is around you.

”I should have told you. I knew that you were my mate the moment our eyes met for the first time. Your boyfriend was right next to you. I. I didn’t think I should tell you. T- then you broke up but the time never was right. You thought that I didn’t like you and I didn’t know how to change that. Even now I keep saying the wrong things that make you cry. I’m really sorry Y/N.” His arms hold you even closer as he tries to apologise. He hopes that he’s saying all the right things for once.

”I love you Jeongguk.” Since he initiated the hug it’s the first time that you let yourself relax and fall against his chest. He can’t believe his own ears. If it’s possible his heart beats a little faster at the confession you shyly whisper into the air. He spins you around to catch your lips and seal your confession. His eyes flash gold for a second before it turns back to his original dark doe eyes that you’ve fallen in love with.

His tongue asks for permission that you give him with a content sigh. Jeongguk doesn’t shy away to devour your lips now that the air cleared between you he keeps one hand buried in your hair and the other fondles your breasts under your worn out shirt. His calloused fingertips on your naked flesh send goosebumps all over your body. He has a lot of making up to do. Never a better time to start than the present and you’re not complaining. Your cunt is already throbbing to have something inside that’s way bigger than your tiny little tampon.

Your breasts are more sensitive to the touch than normal thanks to your period. Even after a few flicks with his thumb over the rosy buds, you could feel yourself getting wetter. His familiar scent is enough to rile you up as you playfully bite his shoulder when he grips your breasts a little harder. You seem to discover a weak spot as Jeongguk throws his head back with a loud moan.

”A werewolf with a biting kink. Who would have thought?” Your laugh is short-lived as Jeongguk doesn’t appreciate your humour at the moment. Your little bite made his cock harden within seconds. He’s a bit sad that he doesn’t get to eat you out this time he really loves how you taste but he’ll make sure to do so some other time once your period is over. Jeongguk flips you over to rest on your back but you stop him before he could rip your and his clothes off and have his way with you.

”Guk we can’t do it on the couch. I’ll never be able to clean the blood from it let’s go to the bathroom.” Jeongguk agrees and lets you stand up. He doesn’t give two shits about your couch but he respects your decision. The bathroom is an easier place to clean and he plans to make a mess.

Jeongguk helps you strip down and while he gets rid of his clothes you remove your tampon and throw it into the bin. The warm water helps your tense muscles relax instantly. It helps when Jeongguk kneads your shoulders the innocent action makes a loud moan rip from your throat that reminds Jeongguk what he should be doing instead. The massage could wait he needs to stick his dick inside you.

You’re so wet and warm. Warmer than normal. He’s not in heat but it feels good to be buried in your tight cunt. If anything he prefers this as he gets to keep a clear head.

You close your eyes when he starts moving. You know yourself that you’ll blush if you see the mess you make but Jeongguk is not bothered by the blood at all, the water washes it away anyway. This is different than before and your heart flutters when Jeongguk keeps you close as he thrusts in and out sloppily. He’s not in a rush to finish he simply enjoys your tight walls sucking his cock in. You accommodate his length so well even though he knows about his impressive size.

Your cramps are long forgotten as Jeongguk makes you feel so good. His curved tip rubs against your bundle of nerves every time he dives back in. He pinches your sensitive nipples while the other unoccupied hand finds your clit to throw you over the edge of bliss you cry out his name when your orgasm hits. Jeongguk releases his load soon after you come down from your high. Both of you clung to each other for a moment longer before you start cleaning up.

The young werewolf has a hard time keeping his hands to himself as you wash the sweat and blood away. You let him run his soapy hands all around your body, you’re glad that he doesn’t try anything other than help you. Your mood has improved and your stomach doesn’t hurt anymore but you still feel a little under the weather because of the symptoms. Jeongguk grabs every opportunity to cling to you as you make yourself some tea. He kisses your shoulder, your neck and your cheeks every so often to show his affection. It feels good to be wrapped around him.

He spends the night at your place before you drive back with him to the packhouse in the morning. Everyone is ecstatic to see you two together it also has been a while since you all got to hang around like this. You missed everyone. You remember how Jeongguk teased Taehyung and his girlfriend when they finally got together and they made sure to tease him right back now that you’re officially a couple.

”They grow up so soon. First Jimin then Taehyung and now our Jeonggukie has found his mate.” Seokjin pretends that he’s wiping away his tears he speaks directly to Namjoon but he makes sure everyone hears him loud and clear. You enjoy how everyone keeps roasting Jeongguk so you just laugh and leisurely play with your lover’s longer stands. The youngest groans when the girls giggle and agree with Jin.

”You oldies should pick up your game. How is it that all the youngest found their mates but you’re all single.” Jeongguk bites back then earns a glare from Hoseok and Yoongi who are seated on the other side clearly trying to watch a film instead of paying attention to the conversation. Not that it’s possible when everyone is so loud.

”Sorry to interrupt but. Guys listen. We have something to tell you.” Jimin holds his girlfriend close one hand is on her stomach as their smiles reach ear to ear. Everyone gasps loudly.

”Wait! No way.” Even Jeongguk sits up straighter as the lovebirds share a cute giggle.

”We’re having a baby!” Jimin announces. The couple shares a sweet kiss before everyone stands up to congratulate and share a hug. You leave Jeongguk’s side to envelop your friend in a warm embrace that soon turns out to be a girls only group hug when Taehyung’s fiancé joins. You all giggle and share your enthusiasm when you catch the boys doing the same with Jimin while they laugh and hug each other. Last month Taehyung’s engagement now Jimin’s baby is coming. What an eventful year. You didn’t think that this year will bring your own happy ending as well but you wouldn’t change it for the world.

Your gazes meet with Jeongguk in the middle of the chaos as everyone celebrates. You both have warm smiles on your faces.

[obeiii-mee]

Hello! Can I request an hc about a shady MC who's not phase by anything in Devildom with the brothers (and Diavolo?? he deserves love!!!)? Like, when Luci's like "i CaN KiLL yOu hUmAN", MC's reaction was like "Oh... congratulations then." i need more shady mc who may or may not be planning to ruin your life😂😂 Thanks and take care!!❤❤

The Brothers + Diavolo with an MC that is not phased by DevilDom

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Pls I need more shady MC, they would not take any shit from the brothers. Put any Gen Z-er with these guys and you’ve got yourself a suicidal and reckless human exchange student.

They wouldn’t know what to do with one of those ahaksbakanhaka you’re right, Diavolo deserves all the love >:(((((((

You better take care too >:( thanks for sending me this big brain request. I’ve been preoccupied with other projects so I took a while to get to this ask. Hope you’re doing OK💙

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Lucifer:

-He thought having a human exchange student was going to be bad enough as it is but this…..this was so much worse than he could have ever imagined

-The moment you arrived, he already knew you were going to be a problem child and a persistent one at that

-Literally the first thing you asked him was : “Why do you look like an off-brand Levi Ackerman?”

-And he was left there, astounded, confused and offended because he had no idea who you were talking about (cuz at that point you hadn’t met the third eldest) and the tone you had was, frankly, pissing him off

-You kept wondering off on your own????? Without looking like you gave a shit even though you almost walked into a butcher’s shop that specialises in human meat???? Tf MC?

-Also really irritated that you couldn’t be intimidated and that DevilDom was like a playground to you, for some reason? Like, MC get out of the fiery pits of eternally tormented souls- this is Hell, not the McDonald’s ball pit ffs

-Things did not improve for him lmao, by the end of the first week he had already ripped out a good chunk of his hair because of you

-“MC, you should know by now provoking demons like this for no good reason is only going to make life harder for you. Keep this up and you’ll get killed in no time because of your behaviour.”

-“Great, can we have a hip-hip and a hurray?”

-In the span of one day, he’s had to come to your rescue six times (approximately) because you’re too nonchalant about your surroundings around literal creatures of hell

-He doesn’t have enough coffee or will to live for this bs

-“Lucifer, I found this dead plant and brought it here because it reminded me of you.”

-“…..sigh. Why? Why does it remind you of me?”

-“Because it’s cold and unresponsive.”

-He made the consecutive decision to ignore you

-(low-key kept the plant tho)

-Honestly, you get on his nerves a lot and he has definitely contemplated killing you in the past but at the end of the day he really can’t bring himself to do it

-We both know he tried a few times lmfao

-“I will tear you limb from limb, human-“

-“Can I finish my tea first.”

-“You…wait, what?”

-“You’re crazy if you think I’m letting this tea get cold. Try to kill time before I’m done and I’ll smash this cup against your head.”

-If you try hard enough, you might even elicit a laugh out of him, especially if your shadiness is directed at any of his brother which results in him patting your head affectionately

-Nowadays he’s just concerned because you seemed to have made an alliance of sorts with Belphagour and Satan and that’s not a good sign

-For his sake, if not yours, at least try to survive the year without getting chomped on by a random demon please

-He’s too stubborn to let you die just because you’re unbothered by everything so cut him some slack and help out damn it

Mammon:

-“Oi Lucifer, how come I’m stuck babysittin’ this stupid human?”

-“And how come I’m stuck with this asshole for a tour guide, with his fake ass designer shoes and no brand sunglasses. That’s a lot of smack talk from someone with crow shit stains covering the back of his jacket. Also, did you stick your hair in a bucket of mayonnaise?”

-……..

-He was so offended lol

-Normally, humans like you cower in fear whenever demons are as much as mentioned because of the whole “I can eat you whole” thing

-And here you are; insulting the Avatar of Greed and one of the princes of Hell himself just because you didn’t like his attitude

-Don’t worry tho, he warms up to you in less than a fucking month simply because you still come to his rescue whenever his brothers start insulting him and wow, look at that, his heart is now combusting on the floor

-“Y’all have no right to criticise Mammon when he has the most self control out of all of you.”

-“Since when does Mammon have any self control? He can’t keep himself from nicking anything that looks shiny.”

-“Motherfucker, I don’t see him trying to choke me to death, respectfully pls shut the fuck up. I don’t want to say I have favourites but if I do, it’s definitely him.”

-While Mammon’s in the background, with hearts instead of pupils in his eyes like ❤️👄❤️

-He doesn’t even mind running around after you anymore (will still complain about it though because your ass is in constant danger and he’s had enough)

-Honestly, you keep starting shit with random demons, some of which are quite powerful mind you, and you don’t back down even when he’s there to step in

-Would low key love to watch you fight one of your classmates at RAD and organise a ticket selling booth for the event but Lucifer will hang him a new one if he does

-So for now, he sticks to baring his teeth at the aggravator in question and you’re there, giving the same demon the middle finger

-The way you sometimes match his energy gets him so hyped up lmao

-“Mammon, did you steal Levi’s money again?”

-“T’s none of her business human. Now go away, shoo!”

-“Bitch, don’t ‘shoo’ me, I ain’t a bird. Now tell me, did you?”

-“…..Why do you ask?”

-“Because a new flavour of instant noodles just got announced, called ‘Super Hell-Sauce Flavour’ and I thought you might be more interested in that than wasting the money on gambling.”

-“….ok but only if you come with me to buy some.”

-This…this is true love right here

Levi:

-Oh no, now there’s two of you

-Why do I feel like his energy would match MC’s almost immediately? Maybe it’s because he spends too much time in his room on the internet like the rest of us do

-“What do you want, you stupid normie?”

-“300…..”

-“….300 what?”

-“300 mangas collected, thousands of episodes of anime watched, over 60 character figurines, plushies, body pillows, merchandise and several posters only to be called a fucking normie by a demon weeb that’s only known me for 10 minutes.”

-Boom, instant friendship

-He becomes attached to you almost immediately and now that he knows how unphased you are by DevilDom, he is seriously worried

-Hell, you’re making him consider going outside his room just to make sure you’re alive and not dead in a ditch somewhere because you decided to get on someone’s nerves that particular day

-Even during the quiz thing, when he almost kills you, you’re just sitting on the floor and awkwardly watching him as he throws a sissy fit

-Levi feels sort of conflicted with you because one one hand you’re good company and he loves having you around, you’re his Henry after all

-But on the other hand, you put yourself in so much danger it makes him paranoid so often to the point where he wants to keep you locked in his room and wrapped in bubble wrap

-Nearly had a heart attack when you almost walked right into a pit of lava like MC???? This isn’t one of his video games???? You’re not gonna respawn if you die????

-Besides all that, he gets a bit jealous of you confidence and your ability to just do whatever without fearing death or consequence

-“MC, how do you do it?”

-“Do what?”

-“How do you go about your life without a care in the world?”

-“I guess I’ll tell you my secret Levi. I’m not like other humans that’s why, I’m just so unique I do things differently.”

-“You sound like a pick me-“

-As long as you’re OK and not injured because of your carelessness, he’s indifferent about your behaviour and will even applaud you for your bravery when it comes to this sort of thing

-“lmao the human exchange student just dumped Solomon’s cooking in the trash while looking him dead in the eye 💀💀💀”

Satan:

-Your attitude towards DevilDom and demons in general kept him entertained, if nothing else

-You rarely seemed to consider how much of a threat that place really is and usually you were just running around, completely ignoring Lucifer’s rules and doing your own thing

-Which, you know, he’s all about

-I can’t say there were no incidents between the two of you

-With his short temper and your tendency to say things without caring about the consequences, there were definitely moments when he might’ve snapped on you

-“MC for goodness sake, what happened to my room?”

-“What do you mean?”

-“It’s an absolute mess! I just told you to bring me my spells and curses book, not mow through everything!”

-“It’s not my fault this place is built like a fucking labyrinth. You should be grateful I went to get it for you at all, I almost tripped and died several times on my way back. Also, you should get a new ladder for your shelves. It did the broken.”

-“MC….”

-“Yes?”

-“You are so lucky I love you.”

-Other than the fact his anger takes over him when things like these happen, he not so subtly encourages you to keep going because seeing Lucifer scowl at your antics gets him wheezing his lungs out

-I like to think Satan would be very impressed, even in the beginning, at the amount of nonchalance you can radiate at times

-I mean, you sure as hell don’t see it often and he loves how unpredictable you are more often than not

-If anything, he should probably thank you-idk how, but his patience has increased significantly every since you got here and he appreciates having some more control of his emotions

-“I’m gonna go put oil in Lucifer’s shoes.”

-“Do you have a death wish?”

-“Satan, I am old enough to make my own decisions and I concluded that this action is necessary.”

-“Necessary for what?”

-“Raising everyone’s morale! All of you seemed to feel down lately so I thought this would be fun for everybody!”

-“Except Lucifer, right?”

-“Except Lucifer. He grounded me from my D.D.D like I’m a fucking teenager who needs to be supervised-pssshht, I’m the most responsible one here.”

-“Yes clearly.”

-“Goodbye dear Satan, I may die today. But it’s for the greater good! (Dramatic exit with sound effects)”

-“WAIT MC!”

-“(pops head back in) yes?”

-“May I offer you my assistance?”

-You’re basically taking turns pranking his brothers and it’s hilarious

-Satan is not too worried about your well being simply because he knows his siblings and him are always going to be nearby to save you if you pull something stupid again

-Even so, he checks up on you throughout the day; just to make sure

-“Where were you?”

-“Running from a bunch of demons. Who wanted to go munchy crunchy on me, I assume.”

-“……”

-“Either that or people here are a lot friendlier than originally expected.”

-You can be such a handful and it really tests him, especially when he’s angry enough to begin with

-But despite your amazing talent at either getting completely lost around Hell, purposely walking into a prohibited place just because you felt like it or riling up others with how blunt you are, he still cares about you deeply

-You may be a pain the ass, but you’re his pain in the ass <3

Asmo:

-He should’ve known something was up with this particular human when you stood there, completely calm and collected, while Beel salivated at the thought of eating you on your first day

-Asmo just brushed it off for a while but it kept happening???

-The first time Lucifer ever told you off, you really went and said “Or what? Are you going to eat me? If so, you can go ahead and start with-“

-He came to your rescue and covered your mouth before you got to finish and before Lucifer unleashed his wrath on to everyone in that house

-“OOPSIE! I think MC has been spending too much time with me. Sorry Lucifer, we gotta run now! We have a party to attend, don’t we MC darling?”

-“You mean the one hosted by the guy that tried to kill me because I shoved into him on the hallway at school and then proceeded to tell him to go fuck himself right back into whatever hell hole he was born in before you came and charmed our way out of it?”

-“Yes.”

-“Ah OK. “

-You’re tiring for sure but you’re not exactly unlikeable

-You have a certain charm hanging about you that Asmo loves

-“I almost died like…30 minutes ago.”

-“WAIT WHAT?? WHY?? WHAT HAPPENED-MC ARE YOU OK???”

-“Yeah, I almost drank some poison today because someone told me it was water. It smelt off though so I didn’t.”

-“….”

-“Anyway, I got you this bracelet on my way home.”

-He really does wish you would take things a bit more seriously

-This is your life on the line, you know? What would he do if you died?

-“MC, you’re not immortal, you can die so much more easily than I can, you know that right???”

-“I don’t care.”

-“Well I do! And you should too….”

-A lot of people don’t see past his vanity tbh, because he can be such a caring person towards the people he loves

-The amount of videos he has of you appearing to be completely calm while pure chaos is descending in the background is pretty impressive

-Every time he uses his charm on you to try and get you to commit his sin, it just doesn’t work???? For some reason???? And even if it’s just with simple, innocent affection for now, he is determined to tempt you into it

-“MC~gimme a hug!”

-“But that’s social interaction and I don’t support it- do you have a charger for my D.D.D by any chance?

-Or at least die trying to ig

-Asmo loves having you around but you’re giving him wrinkles and that’s not okay >:(

Beel:

-The moment he realised how carefree you actually were, he sort of started checking up with you quite frequently throughout the day

-It’s his way of protecting you but if he could, he would follow you around all the time

-Becomes your body guard because you may not care enough about your safety but he certainly does so get ready to be carried everywhere

-You will not get hurt nor will anyone mess with you if he has a say in it and let me tell you, he does

-Thing is, his brothers mostly know him for being slightly dense in some aspects of day to day life

-He’s not perceptive of things that don’t involve food or his loved ones

-And because you most definitely are a loved one of his, he does notice how careless you are really often

-And it scares, rather worries, him because DevilDom is an incredibly dangerous place-even with all the precautions they had taken when you came

-“MC get down, you could fall.”

-“But Beel, look-I’m finally taller than everyone else! Taller than you even! Hey, should I do a backflip?”

-He has no idea why you thought jumping from 60 meter high cliff into a small river of squashed demon blood was a good idea but he wasn’t going to risk anything just because you felt like showing off your diving skills

-Proceeds to carry you away, completely unfazed

-In this case, I feel like Beel is not someone who gets bothered by the horrible things happening around there either

-As long as he has food and his family is safe and happy then he’s also happy, as mentioned above

-But he knows he’s alright with DevilDom because he’s been living here for centuries now

-A bit curious as to why you’re so unbothered

-And even more curious as to why you weren’t terrified of him transforming in his demon form after he lost control when he found out you ate his pudding

-Or more like Mammon did and pushed the blame on you

-“YOU. ATE. MY. PUDDING!”

-“Beel I love you but if you did not just see Mammon shoving the damn container in my mouth two seconds prior to this, then you might need glasses.”

-He apologised to you later for it but even so, you didn’t seem to mind like at all and he didn’t really understand why

-Unless you end up explaining why exactly you feel so indifferent about your life being in potential danger, he won’t really pry

-But now he has even more reason to follow you around like a lost puppy

-Since it’s clear you don’t really care about protecting yourself

-So now it’s his job to do it

-MC protection squad? Mostly Beel and Mammon

-ahhh he cute

Belphie:

-Oh

-You piss him off so much

-He’s trying to have his moment, you know?

-Finally getting that glimmer of satisfaction after killing a human as a way to avenge his sister’s death

-Trying his hardest to make it as miserable as possible because he has so much rage in him, he needs you to suffer

-“Harder Daddy-“

-“Oh fuck off.”

-Nah but for real, what the fuck MC

-Why does he even bother, he feels like he should be sleeping instead of dealing with your bullshit

-Even afterwards, when your future self shows up and he tries to kill you again, you look more thoughtful than irritated???

-Lucifer and Beel are literally holding him back from doing another Chocky on you and you’re standing there, looking at him with your eyebrows raised

-“Hey Belphie, I have a quick question. I know you’re trying to kill me and everything but do you like the colour blue?”

-“HUH??!?!”

-“It’s a simple yes or no question Belphie. Do. You. Like. Blue?”

-“WHAT DOES IT MATTER???!!!”

-“BELPHAGOUR, AVATAR OF SLOTH-YES OR NO, JUST FUCKING ANSWER!”

-“YES! FUCK YOU!”

-“Ah ok thanks. I like blue too :)”

-????????????

-Pls he felt like sticking his foot down your throat

-As of late, he’s kind of glad he didn’t manage to scare you away that day and that he didn’t traumatise you or something

-At the time, he was mad because he didn’t understand why you weren’t scared but now he just wants to make it up to you

-“You didn’t deserve any of that. I’m sorry MC, I won’t blame you if you decide to stay away from me now.”

-“Stfu dipshit, what’s gotten you so depressed? Did you have another fight with Beel? I told you not to eat the last slice of cake.”

-“Rude ass, I was trying to apologise for my past mistakes-let me repent will you?”

-“Said no demon ever. Now let’s go hang out you emo bitch.”

-Y’all vibe together on a spiritual level once that shit gets sorted out

-But he’s kinda scared you might pull out a knife on him ngl

-Obviously, you’re still annoying as fuck with that indifferent attitude of yours but he can live with it

-He appreciates the fact that you’re not scared of him, even after what he’s done

Diavolo:

-Ah yes, the future King of DevilDom himself

-He’s very enthusiastic about the idea of you having fun this year…..and to keep you alive….

-He, of course, expected a range of reactions from you when he first summoned you here

-None of which were “Ok but could you not have given me a heads up? Before the whole teleportation thing? I face-planted your onto marvellously polished the floor and now I think I lost even more brain cells than before.”

-He felt so bad gagajajahahwgehhsb

-He apologised for bringing you out here without any warning like that and then proceeded to introduce you to everyone

-Diavolo is actually kind of relieved to see you’re handling everything pretty well

-He thought that maybe DevilDom was too much for a human to deal with

-Meeting Barbatos also went incredibly smooth

-“Barbatos? The one that cleans the floors right? Big fan of your work, I could eat off the floor of the main hall.”

-He’s so glad to see you getting along with everyone and not getting intimidated by the brothers

-It gets him excited thinking about how the exchange program is gonna work and all three realms will be united

-But he’s not stupid so don’t think he’ll allow you to stumble around, getting up to all sorts of mischief

-He always has someone watching you because he would hate to see you die, despite being pretty fond of your carefree attitude

-“MC, please be careful. Most demons here aren’t all that nice.”

-“Aye aye Captain.”

-He fears that many demons would take your indifference as a challenge and try to assert dominance or something by kidnapping you

-As far as creatures of hell go, they love installing fear in people

-So he always keeps an extra eye open for you

-And he’ll be there to help you if something goes wrong

-But other than that, he’s pretty chill as well and he finds you so hilarious, it’s been a while since he’s seen someone as eccentric and dramatic as Mammon and Asmo

-Idk what else to add here, Diavolo is very accepting and as long as you don’t get hurt, he’s glad you can get used to your new surroundings so easily

———————————-

Al~

[shurisneakers]

harmless (iv)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader, drabble series)

Warnings: cursing, guns, mention of war, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader

Word count: 1.5k

A/N: good evening i’ve never been to any of the places i mention in this series so dont come @ me

if you have any ideas for future inventions/evil plans, lemme know! i might actually end up using them 

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Series Masterlist

He spends the weekend doing nothing. It’s supposed to be relaxing. He finds it nauseatingly boring.

“No mini mission this week?” Steve asks him from across the couch. 

They’re supposed to be catching up on Star Wars but two prequels in and Bucky could feel himself lose his sanity. Anyone could present him with a random assortment of alphabets, call it a Star Wars species and he would have no reason not to believe them.

It’s not like he doesn’t like space. It’s just that he’s had enough of it and everything and everyone who came from it for the foreseeable future.

“No. Someone else is taking care of it.”

“Didn’t you volunteer for this?”

“I pulled myself out of the case.”

“I thought you were having fun.” 

Bucky’s head slowly turns to look at him. “Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know,” Steve shrugged. “Looked like you were.”

Well, he wasn’t. He likes it here at home, glued to the TV. Popcorn beside him, sweatpants on. Refreshing, calming, slow, mundane, and Jesus Christ, so fucking boring-

His spiralling is interrupted by the dinging of the elevator to the common floor. No one was allowed up there unless it was extremely urgent. Guests were barely allowed into the Tower as it was. 

It reveals the receptionist from downstairs, Marie. She’s always a little reserved, a little shy. But Bucky had seen her chew and spit out trespassers or anyone who dared to get on her nerve. He adores her.

“Hey, Marie,” Steve says while Bucky sends her a friendly wave in greeting. “What’s wrong?”

“There’s a hostage situation downtown,” she informs them. 

“Okay...” Steve drawls, waiting for a reason why this was an Avengers level threat.

“They’ve asked for Mr. Barnes by name.” She makes a mention towards him.

Bucky sits up straight. Bits of popcorn fall off his chest. 

“What?”

“They said, and I quote-” she looks down at her notepad. “‘Tell that grumpy motherfucker that I’m waiting for him and that he’s not getting out of this so easily because we have come too far.’ End quote. They’ve also told me to include a kissing emoji. And a skull.”

Steve and he look at each other.

“Well?” Steve prods. 

Bucky sighs and gets up to go get ready.

The entrance of Chuck E. Cheese is more crowded than he’d ever seen. He wasn’t even sure he’d seen people in the store before. If there were, they probably only came up till his waist. 

There are a few journalists, a few policemen standing together outside. Whispers of confusion and curiosity reigned free. 

Bucky gently pushes his way to the front. He gets a nod from a police officer who opens the door for him after a quick briefing. 

The place is darker than it usually would be. A trademark, it seemed. The blinds are drawn shut and most of the light is coming through whatever sneaks in through the crack. 

“Hey, Barnes.” Your voice is muffled by a mask that looks suspiciously like it was made out of classroom craft supplies.

There’s a person in a loose chokehold in your hand with a gun pressed against his head. Once again it looks straight out of a cartoon, purple with round disks lining its barrel. 

“What’s all this now?” He gestures around monotonously. 

“A hostage situation. Didn’t you get the memo?”

“Got that part down, genius,” he bites back. “But why?”

“Fucker kept harassing me when I was walkin’ down the street.” 

The guy’s helpless gaze met Bucky. 

“Catcalling me, stalking me.” You tighten the grip you have on him. “Call me darlin’ one more time, you son of a bitch. I dare you.”

He wasn’t impressed with his pleading eyes. He kinda felt like he deserved it. 

“Why’d you do it here?” The bright colours were starting to give him a heading. “And where are the staff?”

“It’s symbolic, Bucky,” you emphasise, “He deserves to be among other rat bastards.”

Of course.

“The staff?” he asks again. 

“Gave them thirty bucks and told them to leave. I’m not a monster.”

“Right.” He doesn’t bother refuting you. “Why’d you call me here?”

“Dunno.” You shrug. “Thought it’d be fun. You having fun yet?”

You shake the guy you’re holding. He gives a small whimper. 

Bucky doesn’t want to stop you. He had chugged enough Respect Juice in his lifetime to know that this guy probably deserved a threat or two.

Hell, he’d even help but you were more than capable of handling this on your own.

“Listen,” he sighed. “As much as I’m sure he deserves it, this is technically illegal and I’m required to stop you.”

“Sorry sarge, I thought you weren’t interested in playing this stupid game with me,” you mock, voice dropping to imitate him.

“I’m not.” It wasn’t entirely true. One Saturday with Jar Jar Binks had convinced him otherwise.

“Okay, so before you leave, do me a favour and call Hawkeye. I hear he looks mighty fine when he’s annoyed.”

His face involuntarily scrunched up. You were going to replace him with Clint? Clint?

He probably took it more as an insult than he should have.

“I’m not doing that.” Bless his foul mouthed friend, but he was a little shit who was too sarcastic for his own good. At least twice a week he’d say something stupid to Bucky and then take out his hearing aids when he tried to argue back. 

“You’re leavin’ me with no options here,” you groaned, using your thumb to flip a switch. The gun looks like it powered up, lights along the side turning red.

If he let you have this, it’d be a bad look for the Avengers.

New York man dies in Chuck E. Cheese lone hostage situation, unable to be saved by same superhero who tried to fight Thanos with a machine gun.

“Tell ya what,” he says instead, “If you kill him, there won’t even be a slight chance that you’ll see me again.”

Your grip on the gun falters.

“If I let him go...”

“I might consider coming back next week.” He’s trying to spin it, make it look like he’s the one with the upper hand here. “But you gotta let him go.”

You search his face for any signs of dishonesty.

“Let him go or you’ll never see me again.” It sounds too much like Clint’s arguments with his dog who brought a live squirrel into the house. 

“Fine,” you relent, a glint in your eye. “but say goodbye to this fuckface.”

Before Bucky can open his mouth to shout in protest, you pull the trigger. The man clenches his eyes shut, face red.

He expects blood to be splatter across his face.

Nothing happens.

A barrage of bubbles floats into the room.

“I meant it literally,” you say, pushing him off you. “Say goodbye. He’s leaving.”

The man stumbles to the ground and Bucky doesn’t make any attempt to catch him. He scrambles to his knees, picking himself up and scurrying out the door to a hoard of reporters.

The door shuts behind him with the chime of a bell.

“You’re annoying,” Bucky states, giving a small sigh.

“I’m well aware of that.” You pull off the mask, wiping the sweat off your brow.

“Where is the agent assigned to your case?” 

“Dunno. Last I saw he was crying on the driveway of my lair. I just figured he’d pick himself up later so I left him there.”

Bucky’s nose twitches. 

“You weren’t actually going to kill him, were you.” He shrugs with his shoulder towards the door. It wasn’t a question, more a statement. He knew you wouldn’t. 

“I could have.”

“But you weren’t going to,” he repeats. 

“No,” you admit. “I wasn’t. But I’m glad to see you showed up.”

“You held someone hostage as leverage.”

“No, no. I held someone hostage and then asked to see you. They were completely unrelated.”

“You’re evil.”

“You jumped to conclusions,” you point out. “Would you like a trampoline next time? Maybe a pogo stick, you clown?”

He has a very real gun in his holster. His very real metal death arm aches to use it. 

“No one else agreed to come,” he deflects. 

“We both know that’s a lie. You were going to come back anyway.” You stuff the bubble gun back into the bag. “I’m deliciously irresistible.”

“I beg to differ.”

“Then beg.” You give him a smirk and he rolls his eyes. “Don’t worry, you win this round, sarge.”

He doesn’t say anything. He watches you remove your heist gear, revealing normal civilian clothes underneath.

You walk casually to the kitchen, intending to leave through the back door.

“But I can’t say I lost either.” You send him a wink before swiftly pushing open the door and leaving him behind.

He only watches you leave.

It doesn’t hit him until a few seconds later that he let a criminal out of his hands when there were several policemen and journalists outside.

He entertains the idea of chasing you down and handing you over. 

It takes him only a few seconds to decide that if they wanted you, they’d have to try themselves.

Next part 

[sukirichi]

earned it [07]

Gojo Satoru is a firm believer that if you work hard for it then you shall earn it. But on the other side, he’s not unfamiliar with his own sins. He also believes that there is punishment due for his sins as he’s earned it.

cw. explicit smut, pool sex, slight angst, i miss naoya :(, mafia business, mentions of blood, lots of drama, mentions of death and murder

note. IDEK ANYMORE. lmao anyways do you guys want faster updates or do you guys want to wait? i can finish the series next week and then we can move on to white lies 😈

series masterlist

The three of you were seated back at your tables, where the whole dancing fiasco had thankfully ended. Satoru noticed nothing of your behavior – either he was really clueless, or you were a damn good actor – the guy was much too invested with the files Nanami was currently showing.

For a moment, you let yourself loosen as you took a deep breath. The account was much more important than whatever Nanami was scheming.

“I think I may have found where the real money is, or treasure, we should say, since none of us can really figure out what the Zen’ins might be hiding. And from the looks of it, considering Naoya had no idea about what his family kept prior to his death, this is something only his elders wanted to know about,” Nanami pinched the bridge of his nose, sliding a photo of an unsuspecting white manor that you hadn’t seen in a long time. “And it’s been right under our nose the whole time.”

“That’s one of our islands,” you replied with a furrowed brow, “Are you saying you traced the source back there? But that’s impossible, we haven’t used that island for years and even Naoya told me he was going to sell it because it was of no use to us. It’s not on commercial waters and there’s no local people around either. That island is in the middle of nowhere.”

“This is exactly why it’s the best place to hide things – because no one would ever suspect this seemingly harmless middle of nowhere could contain their assets.”

Satoru, who’d kept silent the whole time, inched closer to you. His cologne wafting off to you eased you for a moment – purely because it was familiar – and even though you despised saying it, you were thankful he was here. Currently, the blond man posed a bigger threat, the difference being that Nanami actually had leverage against you while you had more control over Satoru.

You sighed. If Naoya was here, things would’ve been so much better. He never lost his composure in figuring things out on his own. But now that he was gone, now that he’d never be coming back, you had be responsible for his sake, but mostly for yours.

“Take a look at this. The nearest land is a small, uncharted city from Brazil’s outskirts. I’ve been illegally transporting weaponry and firearms somewhere near there since our family started the business – it’s the easiest place to sneak in things without getting caught. All you need to do is pay a few fishermen and they’ll easily transport our load from one place to another, no questions asked,” Satoru announced, seemingly deep in thought as he rubbed his chin. “It would make sense if the Zen’in clan elders found this place useful too. It’s basically a hot site for criminals.”

“But we don’t operate this way. The Zen’in elders are too prideful to handle transactions like this. They would’ve chosen a more…discreet yet formal way of handling things.”

“How does an underwater passage sound?” Nanami pushed the other photo aside to reveal a blurry snap of what seemed like a tunnel under the sea. On the surface, it looked just like an abandoned rig, but it stretched too long, the exterior already covered in mold and seaweed. “About 80 years ago, the Zen’in Clan leader at that time was often heavily targeted by their enemies in business that they preferred to travel under the sea. If my theory is correct, right under that island would be another base of some sort that allows the clan leaders move from one country to another while remaining undetected.”

“So that’s how they easily sent their own shit overseas…”

“It would be a very sound conclusion to assume so,” Nanami crossed his arms at Satoru’s musings, “However, that’s all I know. All I can tell you is where I last got the signal for the source – which is about seven years ago, and a few months right after Toji Zen’in was disowned by his family when Naobito took over. It would also be near around the time he met his wife and had his child, which would increase the possibilities that he may have stored something in this island for his son’s future. Again, it could be money, gold – we don’t really know,” he nodded your way, a sense of finality behind those blue eyes that had now looked so menacing when once it brought you comfort – reassurance. “How you get there is all up to you.”

Something didn’t feel right.

“If the elders really wanted to hide this place, they wouldn’t have passed the rights of the island into my inheritance when Naoya died. They surely wouldn’t have wanted me to find out about this.”

“I could think of two things,” Satoru proposed, “It’s either they trust your potential enough as the clan leader to replace Naoya, or they didn’t think you’d care anyway.”

You let his words sink in. The clan elders have never bothered much with you. They were too prideful about “saving face” and “keeping up images” that they couldn’t even let a word of insult slip past their lips under the belief they were above that. But you weren’t stupid; they had never approved of your marriage to Naoya. An outsider like you, suddenly becoming a part of their family when they could’ve had your husband marry a family friend?

They may have kept silent about their dislike to you, but one way or another, they were going to take action for it.

Knowing the Zen’ins, being a Zen’in, you knew there was one thing they hated the most: not being in control.

“Neither,” you finally concluded while mumbling down at your lap. The theory was hazy, incomplete, based only on mere emotions but slowly, you were coming together to piece it. You felt Satoru turn your way, his large hand caressing your knee as if coaxing the words out of you. “It’s neither. Naoya’s elders…they never liked me. It’s been made pretty clear to me that I’m dispensable without my husband, and I will never be a Zen’in in their eyes. I wouldn’t be surprised if they asked me to give up all my inheritance from Naoya because I’m not related to them by blood.”

The silence in the table stretched.

No matter how grandiose the hotel restaurant may be, you felt suffocated in that seat. How didn’t you realize it sooner? You were in a land that stretched past your territory, with both men accompanying you people you couldn’t wholeheartedly trust, while your husband rotted away back at home – probably covered in dust and not even given a proper burial like he deserved.

There was only one way out of this, to put an end to everything. It would prove to be a daunting task, but you didn’t have a choice. No, in fact, this was your only choice if you wanted to survive.

Satoru’s voice softened upon seeing the grimness of how you turned mum. “I’ll follow you wherever you go. I promise to help you in finding out whatever is in there,” he met your eyes; yours filled with contempt, with fear, with desperation, and his filled with regret. “It’s the least I could do…after everything I’ve done to you.”

You took a deep breath.

You couldn’t lie to yourself. There was no way you could trust him with his empty promises. He’d shown enough times that he wasn’t a man of his word, and you’d be a fool to fall for it again. However, Nanami’s glance was curious and suspecting, hiding his true colors with an innocent gesture of sipping his wine. He may seem unbothered and only here to ‘help’, but this man was cunning, possibly more so than Naoya could ever be, and one wrong move would be similar to stepping on a land mine.

Satoru received no response from you, and soon the three of you were standing outside the hotel’s lobby to escort Nanami back where he came from. The dinner was tense, so much so that you’d unknowingly been clutching Satoru’s bicep the whole time.

He tapped your shoulder, bringing you back to life as he gestured to his phone. “Sorry, it’s Geto.”

“Oh,” you muttered and stepped away from him, feeling your heart sink in your chest as you watched him retreat behind the glass doors. Beside you, Nanami snickered.

“Made up your mind, agent?” he taunted, “This is your final chance to prove yourself. Gather enough intel for us to intrude whatever that mighty clan is hiding underneath that island, surrender Gojo to us, and we’ll give you everything as promised.”

You faced him with fiery eyes, prepared for whatever he’d throw your way when he showed you that cursed red coin again. Realizing its power, the true meaning it held, you immediately shut your lips. It must’ve satisfied to know he was the one in charge here, and how could he not be when your life was literally at the palm of his hands, your days growing more numbered if you didn’t follow everything he asked for?

If you had just…if you had just done everything the Organization had asked you for, you wouldn’t have been here. You wouldn’t have felt this torn.

Nanami flipped the coin before tucking it into his pocket, sending one last salute your way. He hailed a cab and disappeared afterwards, leaving you alone to ponder over the consequences of your actions, your emotions. For the first time in his life, Naoya had lied to you.

He wasn’t correct when he said you were strong.

Because after all this time, you still held onto something that you should’ve let go of a long time ago, and you had nothing but your weak, sensitive, hopeless heart to blame for. Said hurdle appeared not long afterwards, his touch warm on your shoulder as he gazed at the empty spot beside you.

“Oh, Nanami left,” he noted, turning your shoulders to him until you were completely exposed. There was no more hiding from him, or more like you didn’t have enough energy to. You felt dull, tiredness lining your eyes and lips pressed into a flat line. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I am.”

Ten days. That was how much you’ve wasted your time here in Milan, and you weren’t even remotely close to figuring things out. Your resources were much more limited the farther you were from the Zen’in Estate, and your lawyer was a family one, meaning they held more loyalty to the actual Zen’ins instead of law-affiliated people like you were.

Simply put, you were all alone to solve this by yourself.

Satoru promised to help, but he kept disappearing in the morning along with Geto. You never asked where they went or what they did; it simply didn’t matter anymore.

You would only spend hours locked in your room as you researched everything you could on your private island near Brazil. Just like Satoru said, it seemed like the perfect place to hide things for the spot seemed remote enough to offer privacy for the family’s getaway. You could somewhat recall Naoya proposing once to take you there for your honeymoon, but business got in the way, and it wasn’t like you truly trusted him then to spend such an intimate with him that you said no.

Sighing, you put all the papers away. Not even a single clue led you to what could be possibly be there, but there was an underwater passage. The fact the Zen’ins was capable of building that made you wonder just what the extent of their powers and influence stretched to, and you contemplated for a bit if you could hold that same ability now that you had his name.

Whatever was there, you would look for it.

Your mission was clear – the success of it would determine the fate of your life. Find out what they’re hiding, surrender Satoru Gojo to the Organization, and then everything would be over.

It sounded simple, yet your heart knew it wasn’t. Naoya died with the confidence of his trust over you, the trust you worked so hard to earn. But wasn’t that point? You needed him to trust you for you to be able to pull this mission off, but things happened, emotions and conscience got in the way, and you banged your knuckles on the table until your ring throbbed on your finger.

You just wanted it all to end. You never meant to hurt Naoya, never meant to betray anyone, but it fucking pissed you off that Naoya wasn’t the real problem. He wasn’t the one holding you back.

With not much thought to your next actions, you slipped past the guards and into the pool that had long been closed since 10PM. Being at your room’s tub reminded you of memories you’d rather forget, and you slowly undid your robe and stepped out of your underwear before dipping in the cold, freezing water.

It felt good. It may have been temporary, but the numbing bite of the water helped you feel more placated. Even for a little while, it was nice to not worry about anything. There were no titles, no mafia drama, no anything, just you and the water that you would’ve easily fooled yourself to be simply enjoying your little trip in Milan until –

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere. You had me worried sick,” You sighed. Of course. Opening your eyes, you raised a brow as Satoru towered over you, a standard hotel towel in his arms. He’d change out of his suit and into cotton shorts and a shirt this time around, possibly on his way to sleep when he realized the room was empty. With no energy to deal with him, you swam away from the man, earning a groan in response. “What the hell is your problem? You’ve been acting weird ever since Nanami came. Listen, if this is about that island, you don’t have to worry too much about anything. I have enough people and resources to help you in every step of the way.”

You ignored him. After everything that happened, what was there to talk about anymore? Even if you told him everything, he might not understand.

So you swam in the middle of the pool, thankful that it was dark enough from the maintenance shutting the lights off that Satoru struggled to find you. However, you’d underestimated him because soon you heard the splashing of the water, and you were harshly tugged by the wrist before Satoru cornered you at the edge of the pool.

He was breathing hard; both of you were, and tried to push past his chest, only to be met with a solid plane of muscle that wouldn’t budge. You sighed and turned away from him, covering your exposed chest with your arms.

“Whatever Naoya is looking for…you’ll find it, okay?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“I’m serious,” the scorn in his tone had been so biting you turned back to him, about to hit him with something, scold him for something, but your words died down in your throat before you even had the chance to.

Satoru hadn’t been demanding. His face, illuminated by the moonlight, made his azure eyes twinkle like stardust exploding. Once in your life, you found so much comfort into staring at such beauty, but that was when everything was still a perfect lie. Funny how the truth ruined everything for its darkness, and you could only look back at him weakly, throat running dry from all the emotions that threatened to pour out of you.

Regret and desperation was written all over his face.

“Please,” he rested his forehead on yours, eyes closed as he mumbled, “You’re not alone in this. I don’t want to ask for much because I know I don’t deserve it, but please at least understand you don’t have to solve everything on your own. You’re not…you’re not alone. I’m here now.”

“When you left me,” your voice cracked, “It’s because you thought I wouldn’t love you anymore if I found out your true nature,” Satoru opened his eyes, anxiety swimming in those eyes that had once been so sweet. Perhaps he still held that sweetness now, albeit it was less tender and more cautious as he waited for you to continue. “If I told you about every sin I’ve committed, the name of each person I killed and everything I’ve done, would you stay with me? Or would you leave me again, only this time it’s because you think I’m no longer someone you could love?”

“I don’t understand.”

“I didn’t expect you to,” was all you said before you felt a tear prick the back of your eyes. You didn’t want him to see, god, you wanted to disappear in that moment you couldn’t think of anything else. Crashing your lips to his, you brought him down by the back of his neck to hide the tears freely falling from your face.

He froze for a split second before he eagerly pushed back, clenching the pool edges with his hands so hard his knuckles turned white. You were panting, moaning in his mouth as he pressed you harder against the edge, skin to skin, breath to breath, soul to soul.

Threading your hands to his hair, you grinded down on his shorts where he was already beginning to grow hard. Satoru groaned inside your mouth from your teasing but made no move to stop to – after all, why would he want to stop? It had been years, seven fucking years, and even you wouldn’t want to stop. It was wrong, it was dirty, it was immoral – but you needed this. You needed this more than ever.

Satoru’s hands tickled your waist as he squeezed them harsher than he intended, his calloused fingers travelling until he was kneading your breasts. You pulled away from him, head thrown back to rest on the edge.

And it was romantic.

The moon had never been so big, sprinkles of star shining in the vast darkness, the scene just perfect for two lovers in a getaway from the harshness of life. You knew it wasn’t real and the spell would break sooner than later, but did it matter? He rolled your beaded nipples into his fingers before he ducked down, lips suctioned to suck heavy bruises on the sensitive patch of skin on your neck that had you twitching in his hold.

Along with your moans, you cried harder. From heartbreak, from regret, from guilt; there was no turning back from this.

“Satoru, please, please, please. Make me feel better, make me feel good, I just want to forget everything.”

He nodded eagerly against your neck, letting your eager hands help him push his shorts down before his cock sprang free. His length grazed your lower abdomen for a moment, though he didn’t waste any time in entering your hole. You gritted your teeth at the intrusion, nails dug so hard in his shoulders that he bled.

The both of you had your foreheads connected, noses brushing and breaths mixing as you moaned and he sighed, eyes shut tight from finally being engulfed in your warmth.

“Right there, ‘Toru, oh fuck.”

“F-fuck,” he hitched one of your legs to wrap around his waist, “You’re still so tight after all this time,” Satoru praised, molding his lips with yours once again. He picked up his pace and watched as you desperately clung from one surface to another – his shoulders, his hair, the edge of the pool, flailing your arms each time his deep thrusts knocked the wind out of you – breasts bouncing as he bounced you on his cock.

“You look so fucking beautiful – my sweet, sweet angel. I missed you, missed you so fucking much.”

You didn’t say anything. No words were needed to be exchanged; actions spoke louder than words. At least right now, you could promise you wouldn’t lie.

Pulling him down for another kiss, you bit down on his bottom lip to muffle your moans, too speechless at each movement of his dick grazing past your walls. Fuck, he still felt so good, still knew your body way too well and your pussy hugged him so tight like you didn’t ever want to let go.

But you knew you had to, even as he came inside you and brought you back to your room, uncaring of the dripping mess you’ve both made before he locked the door.

You forgot how many hours you spent underneath him writhing in his bed. He took you each way he wanted – knees folded beside your head, on your side where he whispered all the filthy things he’d been wanting to do to you while he took you from behind, or your head squished on the pillow as he repeatedly smacked your ass, pulling your ass cheeks apart to praise you on how you took him so well. Satoru didn’t stop; you knew what you were getting into the moment you pulled him into you, that his sex drive was insane and he’d take long to tire himself out.

By the time the first shy fingertips of the sunlight extending across the horizon arrived, you were emptily staring at the window, Satoru fast asleep beside you.

It was time.

Silently, you pulled his arm away from you and quickly got dressed. He seemed to still be deep in slumber, and you carried the only bag previously packed with everything you might need. You were on the process of wearing your stilettos when he stirred awake, sleepily eyeing you from the bed you both devoted yourselves to in pleasuring one another.

“Where are you going?”

“Away,” you answered, tight-lipped. “From you.”

“Why?”

“Because…I lied,” you inhaled sharply, gloved hands frozen on the golden knobs.

Just open it, you screamed at yourself, walk away before it’s too late.

But you couldn’t move, pathetic that even after everything Naoya had worked so hard for, you still remained a slave to your past.

“No matter how much I hate everything you’ve done to me, I can’t bring myself to forget I once loved you. Maybe I still do – I don’t know. But what I do know is that I’m not as strong as I thought I was,” you cried, losing grip on the bag before it fell. You watched emptily as all the contents poured out – your money, your clothes, your phone, your ring – it all served as a reminder of who you were, of who you’d forgotten to be, of who you were supposed to be.

Your shoulders slumped in defeat.

“I don’t have enough strength to kill you.”

“Hey, angel,” he cooed, reaching you in three long strides before he caged you in his arms. Satoru was so warm, so strong, and the safety he provided you with only made you cry harder. You wanted to hate him, wanted to keep lying yourself since you’d been doing a great job at doing that for the past seven years, but it wasn’t that easy. Deep down…you still harbored the most miniscule affection, and that enough was capable of destroying you.

“What’s wrong?”

“Everything,” you whispered brokenly as you banged a weak fist to his chest, “Everything is wrong.”

Finavice Pharmaceuticals didn’t disappoint.

You were beyond impressed the moment you stepped through the door, a horde of eager chemists guiding you through the upper floors. Finavice was one of the biggest – if not the biggest – companies that were known for harboring the rarest or hard to get elements that not even you and Naoya could get your hands on.

Not by yourselves, anyway, so you took it upon yourself to strike a sponsorship to their research program in developing a cure to cancer under the guise of being an advocate to the improvement of the medical field.

Truthfully, you just wanted to please Naoya, show him you were useful and that he didn’t need to kill you. Desperate times called for desperate measures, and there you were, your prettiest smile plastered on as you scanned the towering buildings with unmasked interest.

“Here is the laboratory for the Finavice Pharmaceuticals where we test…”

“Mrs. Zen’in?”

The entire team stopped as a tall man, cloaked in a beige suit instead of a lab coat appearhed out of nowhere. Judging by how everyone had ducked their heads down and turned silent, you could only guess he must be the boss. Flashing your most charming smile, you hitched your bag higher up your arm. “Yes?”

“May I have a word with you?”

You fought the urge to sigh. His question was spoken much more of a statement that you weren’t really given a room to decline, and the young chemists gazed at you curiously under their lashes.

Not wanting to create a commotion that would lead into unwanted attention, you nodded, following the man through a set of double doors, guarded by two heavily armed men from the outside.

The man, who was Kento Nanami, the founder of Finavice himself leaned back into his seat as he made himself comfortable. “So you signed a contract with us two weeks ago to partner on our latest medicine, am I right? I’ve read over your proposals and I must say, they are rather interesting and innovative. I didn’t expect that a businessman’s wife would be a chemist who is interested in expanding to the pharmaceuticals as well. The Zen’ins has never been much invested in that.”

Gladly accepting the tea he’d slid your way, you made sure to clink the teaspoon against the porcelain as you played along. “People change, Mr. Kento. My husband and I’s goals are rather different from their former, traditional ones. Surely, steel exchange couldn’t support us for the rest of our lives.”

“I can’t say no to that. Kudos to you and your husband for your rather…ambitious shared goals then.”

Your hand froze on the utensil, and you narrowed your eyes at him in warning. “Are you implying we should not have trusted you with this, Mr. Kento?”

“No, I am merely letting you know that your act won’t fool me,” he chuckled, leaning forwards to rest his chin on his clasped knuckles, his blue eyes growing dark and serious. “I know what you and your husband’s family does. The Organization knows a lot more about your actions than you think you know we do. Correct me if I’m wrong, but you’re only here because we’re the only company who has access to an element you need for your drug, isn’t that the case, Mrs. Zen’in?”

Well…this was certainly unexpected. You’ve been effortlessly deceiving countless businessmen, government leaders and officials even, that this took you by your surprise. Two could play at this game.

Even if he saw through you long ago, it wouldn’t take much to grab his letter opener that was right beside you and puncture it through a jugular vein. If his guards came, you could easily take them down too. Today was one of those few moments you were thankful for Naoya’s hellish training.

But you didn’t want him to feel satisfied, so you leaned back into your seat and crossed your leg over the other.

“If you knew this whole time, why didn’t you kill me already? A lot of people wouldn’t miss the chance to do so.”

Nanami chuckled. “It’s because like you, I’m not just a pioneer. I, too, have my goals and loyalty laid out for someone else. Most specifically, the Organization, an international collaborative effort of stopping and reducing mafia movement for the safety of our people. Obviously, I’ve been assigned in the Yakuza Division, and it’s no coincidence I read through your file. You are, after all, one of our precious targets.”

You stared at him boredly. Why couldn’t he just get straight to the point?

“Is this a threat? I’m not sure it’s working.”

“Oh, no, I’m not threatening you,” he snatched your tea and took a long sip from it, and it was the first time you learned of his habit of concealing his curious gaze through drinking; a perfect act to seem inconspicuous.

“I am offering you a path to redemption. You may fool everyone, but I know an unhappy woman when I see one, Mrs. Zen’in, and I can tell you find no pleasure in the life you live – running errands for your criminal husband, constantly fearing for your life, wishing you’d just been a regular person like everyone else…” At the lack of response, he took it a gesture for him to continue, and he set the cup down, pushing his glasses right back up his nose. “The Organization has labeled you a target, but I think you’re more of a victim caught in a series of unfortunate events. I merely wish to save you from it.”

You guffawed in laughter at his last statement.

“You men really are ridiculous!” you slapped your palm on his table, losing every bit of that elegant composure to be perfected by a Zen’in wife. “Always preaching about saving me and protecting me – what actually are you pathetic losers even capable of?”

Much to your dismay, Nanami didn’t seem the least bit affected by your mockery.

“Please, don’t group me in with your husband and your former lover. Unlike them, I harbor no interest in you as a woman, I only want to fulfill my duty as an Agent and save you not because you’re a damsel in distress, but rather because…I could kill two birds with one stone,” his eyes shone in mischief, and you swallowed in discomfort as he gazed you up and down.

You’ve had enough experience with being seen as a meal, but this was different. Nanami was viewing you like you were a secret weapon he intended on using as much as he could to achieve his goals.

“You are a very convenient woman, Mrs. Zen’in. Similar to how your husband adores your abilities, I would like to take advantage of your connections. The only difference between me and them is that I can actually give you something money can’t even buy.”

“Such as?”

“A second chance at a normal life.”

“What makes you think I’ll accept your offer? I’m the wife of a mafia leader – my loyalty resides in him.”

“Only because you fear for your life,” he flashed you a red coin, crescents of a Latin quote scripted inside. Mori quam foedari – death before dishonor.

“Join the Organization, Y/N. With your connections, we could easily take down these families and protect the country. Hand over Satoru Gojo and Naoya Zen’in to us, and I promise the Organization will do everything in its power to give you the life you always wanted. A safe, normal one. No more worrying about being killed as you ride your car, no more beating yourself up as you make drugs to promise your usefulness to your husband and no more pretending you are someone who you’re not,” he flipped the coin between his fingers, and tantalized, you couldn’t keep your eyes off it. “Don’t you want that? You’d be able to live freely if you cooperate with us.”

You could hear the gears in your head turning. Part of you would’ve assumed this was a trap had you not known better, but Naoya taught you that if something was a trap, it would sound too easy, too good.

None of this was easy. It would require facing a demon from your past and handling things differently than what Naoya had planned, but that wasn’t the worst.

It was the fact that if you accepted, you’d have to come home tonight and lie in the face of your husband who could easily read through you. He smelled lies and treachery before you could realize you were even thinking of doing something, and knowing Naoya, he wouldn’t hesitate to put a bullet between your eyes the instant he felt something was off.

But his offer… it was a risk you had to take. You wouldn’t ever get an opportunity like this again.

“Do you promise…that I’ll really go back to normal after this? That I won’t be involved in this mess anymore?”

“I can only promise that if you also promise to do your part. You see, I strongly believe you are the one that can put an end to this all. All you have to do is join us, and soon it’ll feel like this nightmare never happened at all. You’ll be free from Naoya Zen’in and Gojo Satoru before you realize it.”

You stared at his coin harder. Death before dishonor. This Organization he was a part of obviously didn’t fuck around, and it seemed scarier because they had their eyes on you for a while now. What were the odds they offered a deal instead of outright killing you, even going as far as to provide you a second chance at life, one that you genuinely wanted to enjoy? It would be a shame to say no, and even if the chances of this turning out well were low, you would damn well take it. A small chance was better than nothing.

“What do I have to do?”

Nanami grinned and pocketed his coin. “A very wise decision, Mrs. Zen’in,” he congratulated, “Please, meet me at my office tomorrow, eight on the dot. Oh, and remember, the Organization will now be watching you wherever you go. You’re one of us now.”

The next day, Nanami had cut your palm.

He spilled your blood into an empty metal casing with engraved letters, mori quam foedari, the phrase both comforting and ominous. Soon, you came home with your blood solidified into a coin to prove your membership and loyalty, that they quite owned you in more ways than one. Your blood meant your loyalty, and the coin felt heavy in your pocket with the implication it was also your blood they wouldn’t hesitate to spill should you betray them.

Mori quam foedari.

Death before dishonor.

Your life over Naoya’s, your future over Gojo’s.

The next few days had been tense. After telling Satoru everything down from the smallest detail, things had shifted between you. Quite frankly, you expected that maybe he’d kill you right then and there after explicitly stating that just because you couldn’t kill him, didn’t mean you wouldn’t turn him in.

“Angel,” he begged, “Will you never really give me the chance to do everything right this time around?”

However, you were too firm on your plans. You originally wanted to leave and go to the island yourself; it was easier to leave Satoru open and vulnerable for the Organization to attack him in your absence. He loved you, that was much clear, and if he looked for you, he’d make himself vulnerable to the Organization, but recent plans had to be altered now that he wasn’t willing to let go of you. Though no matter what he said, you valued your life and future more than you could ever love him.

It was an act of kindness to yourself.

“I don’t want this life anymore, Satoru. Either way, I don’t have a choice, not when I could die literally anytime before I could even say goodbye.”

It had been hours since ‘that’ talk and now you were on a plane back to Tokyo. You had to pull out some archives from Naoya’s files to know more about the island before you could visit it, and it was important for Satoru to know details such as security measures over there.

You’d long fallen asleep from exhaustion, bundled up in a fleece blanket while Geto glared at you.

“Are you sure about this, Sir? I think we should just keep her with us even if she doesn’t want to. The Gojo clan is powerful enough that no one would dare cross us. Not even this Organization she speaks of has ever done anything to us. Without her, they stand no chance against us,” he sat in front his boss and kept sending wary glances your way. “Letting her go like you did before wasn’t a good idea. She knows too much about everyone to live normally now. Do you really believe the Organization will protect her?”

“Knowing the strings the government could pull – and add on to the fact Nanami Kento, one of the richest men in this country works for them that it’s safe to assume each figure in them is a powerhouse – I don’t doubt their promise one bit.”

“But you’ll go to jail if you let her surrender you. Or worse, they’ll destroy the clan from the bottom up.”

“I know that, Geto.”

Geto groaned, brushing his hands through his hair from how indifferent his boss was being, drinking champagne as if he wasn’t willingly walking into his own death. “Then why aren’t you thinking more clearly about this? I understand you love her and you want to make it up to her, but we can’t let her do whatever she pleases! In order to keep herself safe, she’s going to sacrifice you! She’s dangerous, Sir, she’s been lying to her husband the whole time and who’s to say she isn’t capable of doing something worse to a stranger like you?”

“I told you already, Geto,” Satoru swirled the pink liquid in his flute, his face empty and unreadable. “I know.”

“With all due respect, Sir, I don’t agree with your decision. The clan would fall without you and you don’t have siblings or an heir. No one is powerful to hold the clan together aside from you so if you leave – there’s no more hope for us,” he sighed when Satoru didn’t budge. “I at least want you to reconsider your actions. She’s just a woman, Sir. It’s either we kill her or we imprison her. You let her go before because you believed she would be your downfall, and quite frankly, it’s happening all over again.”

Satoru gazed out the window, bringing the flute to his lips with a dark glint in his eye that Geto recognized meant trouble, or worse, an actual solution to this hellish situation.

“Which is why we’re going to pay an old friend a visit, Geto. There’s only one person who could turn the tables around.”

ADDITIONAL NOTE: TOJI IS COMING SOON!!! what are your theories on what might be on that island and *drum roll* WHO IS GOJO’S OLD FRIEND?! 

taglist open:

@tete027 @sixeyesgojo @shingekiyofeels @q-the-rockaholic @whatthefuckisthatthing @rogueofbullshit @kat-su-ki @kellyyween @sebootyforlife @asshxcm @charlie-xo @aoi-turtle @ladywaifuuwrites @savantsoulfinder @my-reality-is-in-my-head @hannya-quinn @90s-belladonna @tinyfrogsinmybrain @kinekyuroo @evesmores @ambiguous-something @lilith412426 @kakashiharusohma @aizawap @yumeneji @dora-the-grownup @jotazinha @themrsgojo @d34r-s4t4n @marai-t @toji-bee @hai-cool @badsadbby​ @stesphy @peach-buns-unicorns @misslezah @gracefullyfallinglikeanime @iwaplant @mikiminaccch @riri-marley​ | bolded users cannot be tagged

[fromthefishbowl]

Can you elaborate on how they don’t see Marwan as a person please ?

Okay, so... here's the thing: most, if not all, the people who claim to be constantly working against racism in fandom are, themselves, so fucking racist it's incredible. Racist and xenophobic and antisemitic and overcompensating like hell because they know they're shitty people but actually working through their problems is too hard so they have to pretend it's the others, who are racist and xenophobic and antisemitic.

They pretend to like Marwan because they can use him as a prop for their internet wokeness and virtue signalling, and they pretend to care about racism in fandom spaces because it's one of the easiest ways to gain attention and followers. But we all have seen what they do when one of them is outed as being actually racist to the point of using racial slurs against MENA people: they fall into silence and make excuses and then get mad when people won't let them move on as if nothing happened because they think they didn't do anything wrong ever. Sending death threats, rape threats, insults, harassment, writing slurs against the people they pretend to be campaigning for... all this shit is normal, to them.

Their attitude towards people like Marwan pops out when they interact with actual MENA and Muslim people: they belittle them, insult them, send them links to articles written by white Americans about how to discuss Islam.

Just look at how they write Nicky: they perceive him as "white" - lmao - so they use him as the token racist character that can embody their dumb thoughts about Joe/Marwan - which... again, it's incredible how xenophobic these people are too. Like, it's clear that they are in this fandom because "brown man give us brown points uwu" and they couldn't give a shit about any of the characters, not even Joe, because if they actually cared they wouldn't have propped up an artist who draws him a thousand shades darker than how he actually is -. So Nicky, the character who is canonically always shown as being head over heels for Joe, turns into a racist, ignorant gremlin uncaring of his husband's culture and who doesn't respect him.

Like... even the whole debacle of "if Nicky rapes Joe it's fine because colonialism" is so fucking stupid. These people just like to imagine Joe/Marwan being abused. It's a fetish they turned into morality. Like... it's fine if you want to be fucked by Luca, you don't have to make up a discourse around it. You're fine with the thought of being dicked down by Chris Evans, you should be fine with the thought of being dicked down by Luca Marinelli too. Literally the only difference is that you're xenophobic and it really shows.

But to go back to Marwan... I was talking about it with a fandom friend, and they said that they like to "defang" him and his characters: they are scared of him, so they need to neuter him, take away from him any characteristics that make him """big""" and """scary""". It really says something, the fact that Len the Defender of the Weak Moroccan People and Undiscussed Maghrebi Princess, in that long ass post about how much of a victim she is, talked about MENA men being dangerous thugs and used Majid as inspiration: she couldn't make him defenseless and small and uwu, because Majid is aggressive, hot headed, a criminal - which... what a fucking shallow read of his character, my god - so he scared her and was the first thought when she came up with the idea of "lemme write a woe is me post and include how dangerous and unruly the MENA men I know are".

So when they write Joe they make sure to eliminate every possible thing that scares them. Canonically, Joe is protective, active, aggressive when people hurt his family; he is open and charismatic and loves deeply, but he also doesn't forgive easily; he hunts down Keane with the specific purpose of murdering him for having shot his husband and insists that Booker needs to be exiled for a hundred years for what he did; he is not religious in any possible way, and when he swears, he says the names of Catholic saints. But he can't be these things, because Marwan is a brown man - fuck, how much I hate relegating people to their race. So fucking American, I swear - and if a brown man does these things then he scares them, so they turn him into this... weak, demure creature who cannot get mad because otherwise it's racist, who cannot stand up for himself and his family because otherwise it's racist, who cannot do this or that because otherwise it's racist. They make him religious to the point of being almost a fundamentalist, but orientalize Islam by taking away any restrictive aspects and make it all flowers and rainbows. They write Joe as the stereotype of the Noble Savage: he can only be positive things because somehow he hasn't been corrupted by the evil white civilization to the point that he even lets his husband insult him. Ooooh, how big is their Joe's heart!

And the same thing is applied to how they want people to perceive Marwan: he's just a widdle boi. When people were joking about him being a Dutch fuckboi - which... he is, he really is -, they were going mad and saying it was racist. Why would it be racist? How? Because Len told you about that stereotype about MENA men she got completely wrong? Marwan is a charismatic, handsome guy who clearly knows how he looks and who works in an industry where he is constantly around people who are as beautiful and charismatic as him. He is aware of how good looking he is. He talked in interviews about how he likes to "chat up girls". He makes fun of it himself, and yet we can't talk about it because "Brown man with a sexual life they can't control" scares them, it makes him an actual person and not just a picture or a video they can reblog with dumb tags about his looks immediately followed by racial slurs.

They defang him. They neuter him. They take away his humanity because, if Marwan were human, he'd have "bad" characteristics too, and they just can't have that because then he'd become scary again.

And like... let's always remember that when Len saw him with a look she didn't like and that made him look like probably 50% of MENA men who are over a certain age, her first instinct was to insult him with a racial slur and think it was something cute to do.

[skampi835]

Let’s never speak of this again! (Motonari x reader)

Let’s celebrate Motonari’s upcoming route with an oneshot! 🥳 Since I hopefully avoided most of the spoilers I didn’t come up with any good idea, but then I found this:

you and your enemy hug each other, it's completely accidental, and neither of you know why it happened, and it's like,,, you glare at each other, with an expression of ''let's never speak of this again'´

Thanks for putting this idea in my mind @screnwriter​!

Fandom: Ikemen Sengoku

Language: english

Starring: Motonari x reader (female)

Genre: Comedy

Warning: besides Motonari’s slanguage surprisingly none... ahaha who am I kidding? It's Motonari 😂

real Warnings: angst, bad language, violence (fighting scene!)

Word Count: 1.810

“Get her!”

Shoot! How do I always end in situations like this?!

With this thought you’re bolting straight into the next alleyway. You’ve left the busy trading streets of Azuchi a long time ago and unfortunately lost track of your current position due the rising panic inside of you. Honestly, you’ve no idea where the heck you are right now! Though obviously still in Azuchi you’re running hopefully into the right direction towards the fuller marketplace!

Desperate, you’re squeezing your way through a very small gap between two buildings and dash on. Maybe your pursuers can’t follow you through this and it'll buy you some extra time! The shouts from traders and the sounds of frisky chatters are getting louder with every step you’re taking, which means you have to be on the right track!

Determined you’re keeping up the fast pace, praying you’re able to shake off your pursuers completely in the crowds of the busy market, as you round the next corner. But all of a sudden you’re awfully crashing into a wall.

“Woah!”

“Uff--!”

The heavy impact is stealing your air, though obviously not only from you, but also from said wall, which in the hustle and bustle you’re literally falling into his arms eagerly not to fall. Together you’re even staggering sideways for a split second. Stressed and tense you’re spinning your head up with surprise, staring into the startled, wide ruby red eyes of the man. "Wah-…?"

“… You?!”

You didn't even realize how tight you were clutching Motonari when you crashed into him, until he’s violently yanking your arms away. "The hell yer doing? Got a bloody death wish?" He hisses and is glaring at you furiously.

As shocked as Motonari's reaction was, so are you aghast to face him right now. "What, of all people, are you doing here?!" You snap, still completely out of breath.

Quick steps are pulling you back to the current situation you are still in. You were supposed to keep running from your pursuers but simultaneously you’re facing an enemy of the Oda forces. Your situation is definetly growing somewhat hopeless. Nevertheless the sight of Motonari’s anger makes it a lot easier for your decision, to pass him and run away, than to stand rooted on the spot.

Unfortunately Motonari suddenly grabs your wrist roughly when you've just turned away and is pulling you back. "Ack-…! Let me go!" you plead.

"I won't do shit," Motonari growls venomously. "Now that yer recognized me, princess, I’ve gotta improvise something."

The hectic steps from the side street are getting louder with every passing moment, before they’re coming to a sudden stop right next to you. “There’s this witch!” One of the pursuers is shouting. He’s considerably tall with broad shoulders and a massive body. Shortly afterwards another two coarse figures appears behind him. They’re building themselves up with stern grimaces in the narrow alleyway.

Your eyes anxiously widen and your body starts to tremble ever so slightly. But there is no running away again for you, for Motonari’s adamant grip is chaining you.

"Huh, didn't even know yer know so many grim-looking acquaintances, princess." Motonari’s saying coolly, scanning the three men with his steely gaze. Still he doesn't loosen his grip on your wrist instead he’s tightening it.

"I haven't!" You snort, trying to yank your hand free to get away from him - without avail. You don’t know if it's better, getting caught by Motonari or these guys. But you know for shure both scenarios are pretty bad.

"Hey, you there! Plat-head!” One of the scoundrels growls and is glaring at Motonari grimly, whose dryly raising an eyebrow at this denomination. "Give us the little girl. We have business with her."

“That stupid hussy broke my nose!” Another of them shouts indignantly. You’re noticing his swollen red nose and you can't suppress a brief, yet inappropriate, flash of pride in your face.

It was just a few minutes ago, when they stalked you after you’ve exited your favorite shop. Unfortunately this shop is located in the outskirts of the village so there weren’t many people when they confronted you. The guys wanted to ‘talk to you nicely’ and after a few seconds you’ve ‘nicely declined'. Thank goodness you know some techniques of self-defense!

However, even more inappropriate is Motonari's spiteful laughter that he’s suddenly uttering. It’s giving you the creeps! "Seriously?" With a quick sideways glance in your direction with his ruby red orbs, he’s grinning at the fellow with extreme smug. "Tell me, how’d she did it, putz? Did she climb onto yer?"

Good gracious! Wouldn’t you please make him madder than he already is? Pretty please?!

"What did you just call me?" The broad shouldered man’s roaring furiously. Shortening the distance to Motonari, he’s threateningly waving with his massive fist.

Without wanting to, you’re quickly seeking cover behind Motonari, who has finally let go of your wrist. Now with his hands free he’s facing the attacker. With quick reflexes Motonari’s skillfully dodging the scoundrel's punch and draws his sword with a metal 'shink' that’s humming in the air. You’re holding your breath when Motonari’s holding the blade right against the throat of the ruffian, who is instantly not moving a muscle anymore. "Are you out of yer damn mind? You fucking want to take me on unarmed?!"

Motonari’s sounding incredibly unimpressed, for it was him against three rapscallions, but also incredibly pissed. No matter how this will end, you're sure you won't be of any use. So you’re looking around for an escape route. But you are cornered. The only side you could rush to is a dead end.

"The lil’ one’s mine, get it? So piss off, aye? ” Motonari’s growling with a frown and kicks the man roughly in his side. Gruntling the man hits the ground hard.

"You sunova-!" Furiously about the defeat of his crony, another ruffian - not quite as stupid as his predecessor - is trying his luck with a rusty dagger, when he’s running towards Motonari. But after a few seconds it lands on the ground, followed by the guy.

The last of the crew charges in, just to earn a brutal smack with the back of Motonari’s sword in the side of his neck. "Tch! How the hell did ya morons think yer can take me on when a lil’ girly beat you up? Ya wanna make me really mad?”

You’re recognizing the change in the air around Motonari. It’s tense, shifting from the beginning amusement to bloodlust. Motonari’s wielding his sword, but apparently used it just to disarm his opponent. But now it seems that he won’t restrain himself any longer.

"Crap, let's get out of here!" The guy with the lost dagger is yelling towards his pals. Frantically they’re getting up and quickly disappear into the alleys.

You sigh, relieved as the men finally disappear. But just one moment later your heart’s sinking completely into your boots when Motonari turns back to you, though this time with a sword in his hand. "Back to ya, princess."

“I haven't seen or heard anything!” You shout, throwing your arms up in air and backing from him. Now pressed against a real wall on the side of the house, your heart is pounding up to your throat, when you meet Motonari’s sharp gaze. Luckily the bloodlust you’ve seen before has gone, too.

Motonari’s raising an eyebrow, probably irritated by your strange reaction and is fixing you. Then the corner of his mouth curves up to an amusing smirk while he’s withdrawing his sword back to his belt. “Heh, ain’t that a start?” He snickers.

Abruptly he shortens the distance to you, placing one of his white gloved hands right next to your head against the wall behind you. Superior and smugly, Motonari’s looking straight into your eyes, straight into you. The tension’s getting tangible again and your heart’s pounding hard in your chest. "You owe me. I bet you saw nothing, understood?"

Something you least of all wanted, is to owe to some madman like Motunari! His stern expression is sending a shiver through your spine. "I- ... uhm ... thank you?"

"What should I do with yer thanks? Can’t buy anything with ‘em.” Motonari snarls dissatisfied and is slightly narrowing his eyes. "Either you damn shut yer mouth about everything ya saw - hell, just forget I’m even here! Or I'll cut out yer pretty tongue. Ain’t that a deal?"

Automatically you’re pressing your lips together sealing your mouth - and especially your tongue. You’re staring at him in horror with wide eyes. "Let's never talk about this again, aye?"

What joice do you have? Of course you could just agree with Motonari and then tell the warlords about his whereabouts. But you’ve always been a woman which sticks to her word, no matter how bitter this one is. Not entirely sure whether he'll still carry out his threat to cut off your tongue, you're just nodding, while glancing determined up to him.

"Splendid." Motonari’s pushing himself off the wall with a mask of satisfaction on his face, giving you the way free. "Then rush back to yer patrons, ‘lil princess.”

Uncertain you’re blinking towards him. Motonari makes no move to stop you, he’s just waving with his hand in your direction. He really leaves you with just that! Without further thinking, you’re taking to your heels and bolt away. Not that he'll change his mind after all!

After two more alleys, you’re finally reaching the busy and crowded market and try to calm your panicked pounding heart. That was definitely too much excitement for one day! Still, you're grateful for Motonari getting those ruffians off your back. But why does it haf to be Motonari of all people?!

A deal is a deal, you’re thinking to yourself taking one last, deep, nessecary breath. Certainly it won’t mean anything good that Motonari’s currently in Azuchi. You just hope, you won’t regret this deal someday.

With quick steps you’re heading purposefully back to the castle. Even if this idiot surely won’t appreciate it, your silence about that accident was certain to him.

And you are going to take to grave, that you’ve embraced Motonari by that accident, when running into him. Yes, better never even think about this again!

_____

Motonari’s running his white gloved fingers through his hair and grunts in annoyance, after you left. That you’ve recognized him is a great nuisance to him. It’s time to rethink his plans. That would slow things down a lot.

As if he’d actually trust a little princess like you to keep her mouth shut. What stupidity!

Casually he drives his hands on his sides to get rid of the strange feeling from your delicate arms embracing him.

Let's never talk about this again. - Yeah, better let's not.

[barbiegirldream]

Have you seen the newest Karl Jobst video?

I have watched it actually. Lol I watched it while slacking at work.

I’ll say one thing first. When the drama happened I literally could have cared less if Dream cheated or not. His speedrun videos were never my favorite. I’m actually a huge fan of cheating. Academic dishonesty is a hobby of mine I actually use to teach people in Algebra how to make their calculator do the work for them which if you ask me isn’t even cheating. And my English teacher once asked me how I was so good at faking having read books as if every single book in high school doesn’t have the same major plot points and themes.

Plus I’ve helped my brother run scams in school that cost people actual money so fucking hell, Minecraft? That’s what people cared about? Dream wasn’t running a pyramid scheme for fucks sake.

The death threats to the mods? Do we forget what happened to Dream then? Does the reason the MCC baby meme came about mean nothing? Only for their narrative right?

Anywho yeah Karl basically just explained the past bin in a super sized video tbh. It always seemed to me that Dream had a mod that shouldn’t have done what it did and then when he realized he fessed up. Like Dream is 100% responsible for the fact that his modder hid info from him? It takes a lot more than a decent person to not shift blame it would have been easy to do it even but Dream didn’t because he’s not that guy.

And if you look at the context it makes zero sense for Dream to have cheated. He’s close to other high ranking speed runners. The video where he broke the world record with George and Sapnap there he was so fucking happy. That is not a master manipulator. He’s just some guy who likes Minecraft.

Imagine your Dream. You’re 21 and a massive youtuber all of a sudden. You didn’t cheat, you wouldn’t cheat. Cheating is being dishonest to gain an advantage he didn’t do that he wasn’t lying. And all of these people are accusing you of cheating. People are saying the most vile shit. They’re sending death threats. They’re doxing you. You can’t express any frustration without your craziest followers sending death threats and nothing you say will calm them down. You’re being held accountable for the actions of millions while being treated like Satan over Minecraft. You are told then that someone who works for you accidentally caused this mess and you’ve got to say something but how after fucking everything could you just come out and admit you were wrong. But you’re not just decent no you’re a good person so you fess up and take full responsibility for it and apologize. Then the hate comes back ten fold. No one believes you but they didn’t in the first place did they? And yet you can’t try and clear your name without people standing there trying to prove you’re an actual monster.

Just I’d have cracked. I’m nowhere near as nice as Dream I’ve never even thought to be as kind as him. I’m kinda annoyed when people call him decent cause no I know decent men. And they don’t give hours of their time away to help their friends. They don’t give away their tips and tricks to kids in hopes they’ll be big one day too. They don’t come away from conversations with people and the practically unanimous consensus is that he’s really nice. And lovely, and that he’s an inspiration for so many people. And so many people who know him personally would like to thank him for all he’s done. And he gives away money to causes all of the time and to his friends to show his love. Like I just can’t imagine judging someone so fucking harshly over a Minecraft scandal. And not realizing that everyone who actually knows Dream’s character has backed him all the way.

And to the people who think he’s a sociopath or whatever I was raised by an actually fully diagnosed sociopath or anti personality disorder who has zero empathy and he has done truly heinous things (shout out to the US military) like there is no world in which a Minecraft youtuber actually achieves the level of fucked up people think he is.

Anyways I still am a big fan of Dream I didn’t think the video would ever change my mind on that. But I actually originally thought it was just Dream didn’t idk check the notes of what was in the mod. Not that the developer hid what he did from Dream after realizing he fucked up. But as someone who’s definitely fucked up at work the last thing you wanna do is fess up so yeah.

Best thing is to do what Dream said and put all this behind us. He and the mods are cool and that’s that.

[ratonnhhaketon]

Still Breathing

Read on Ao3 | Next Chapter

Summary: Six months after the defeat of Thanos, the world is still in chaos. The threat of the Flag Smashers combined with the new headstrong Captain America means it's time for Valencia Zicari to help save the world one more time. But, in doing so, she also has to pick up the pieces of a broken relationship.

Warnings: Major TFATWS spoilers, Swearing, Angst, Fluff, Slow-Burn, John Walker (just in general)

A/N: HHH, new fic time! TFATWS has been consuming my brain these past few weeks and it was only a matter of time before I made another oc and wrote for Bucky. I’ve had this in the works since the first episode but I’m super excited to finally be ready to start posting! This fic will be relatively short but I do also plan on doing a prequel fic eventually to further flush out my marvel oc, Valencia Zicari. I apologize that this starts off kinda slow, with just two phone calls at the beginning, but it will pick up a lot in the upcoming chapters. In the meantime if you have any questions or comments about the fic or Val’s story, don’t hesitate to send them my way! Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 1 - Your Number On Speed Dial

Bucky’s eyes shot open, his throat closing and lungs gasping for air. He felt the sweat covering his body, the thin blanket tangled between his legs. The cool metal of his dog tags swung against his chest as he sat up, chest heaving as he sucked in breaths and tried to regain his breathing. He looked around his surroundings, slowly calming down as he noticed he was in his apartment. 

Another goddamn nightmare. 

Realizing he was alone, Bucky instinctively reached up onto the chair next to him for his cellphone. He flipped open the phone, eyes squinting to adjust to the light of the small screen in front of him. He noticed the time, 3:08 am. While he knew that she would more than likely still be up and wouldn’t mind talking, he felt guilty for instinctively reaching out for her this late. Still, he let his hand press accept and after only two rings he heard her familiar voice pick up. 

“Hi Buck,” she said with a smile, exhaustion evident in her voice.

“Hi,” he replied with a hoarse voice, sleep still clinging to his vocal chords. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?” 

“I could ask you the same question,” she said with a small laugh. “But, yeah. Probably. I’ve been working my ass off trying to get in contact with Fury and nothing is working.”

“Not even through the SHIELD lines?”

She sighed, a hand coming up to rub at her temples. “I’ve tried, but he’s ‘on vacation’ and is only taking messages if they’re life or death.” 

“I mean, shouldn’t he be able to make an exception for you? Given, y’know..”

“Unfortunately I lost the ‘you’re my adoptive daughter’ privilege when I decided to grow up and join the Avengers.” Bucky chuckled in response, his nightmare finally starting to fade from the back of his mind. “I’m just.. worried about Wanda. The whole situation still isn’t sitting right with me, especially since any information has been classified and no one at all can access it.”

“Val,” Bucky said quietly, his metal hand coming up to rub against the chain hanging around his neck. “When was the last time you took a break?” 

He heard an audible sigh over the phone and a pause before she spoke up. “Not since half of the world disappeared.” 

“Well, how about this. Thursday, you finally put all of that aside for a few hours and we can grab lunch. I’ll buy.” 

She thought it over for a moment, Bucky’s breath hitching in his throat in the few seconds it took before she spoke up. “Yeah, that sounds nice. We can go to that sushi place you used to take me to.” 

“Sounds perfect, doll. I’ll see you then. Now go get some rest.” 

“You too, old man.” 

~~~~~

Valencia stood in the common room of the compound, a scowl present on her face as she watched the tv. John Walker’s Good Morning America interview was playing at a low volume. She hadn’t even met the man yet and already hated him. Partly because of how he talked about Steve without knowing the first thing about him, and partly because every journalist in the state of New York had been contacting her in an attempt to interview her about the new Captain America. Pulling her eyes away from the screen, she noticed her phone vibrating to announce an incoming call. She answered, a smile tugging at her lips for the first time in the past day. “Hey Bucky.”

“Hi,” he said shortly. She could feel the anger in his voice. “Have you seen the news?”

“Absolutely,” she replied, her scowl returning to her face. “Everyone has been bothering me about it for the past day. I had to tell Pepper that if one more reporter asked to take a statement from me I’d throw someone out of a window.”

“Jeez. Little harsh, don’t ya think?” 

“Probably,” she said with a small laugh. 

“Hey, have you talked to Sam recently?”

“Yeah, I was just talking to him earlier before you called. He was telling me about having to go to Munich today, something about the Flag Smashers? I don’t know, he didn’t really give me a lot of information.” 

“No, that's great. Thanks, doll. See you Thursday.” 

“Alright, Buck. See you then.” 

~~~~~

Any normal person would be astonished by the amount of trouble one person could get into in the span of 18 hours. But, in terms of being an Avenger, it’s just a normal Wednesday. Especially when it’s Sam and Bucky’s fault. But, Valencia still found a way to be freaking out when Pepper rushed into her room, shoving a phone into her face to announce that Bucky had a warrant out for his arrest. And had subsequently ended up in a Baltimore jail. 

In under an hour she had flown down to the city and found the facility Bucky was being held in. She pulled open the door to the jail, eyes quickly scanning the crowd of people before landing on Bucky’s literal partner in crime. 

She made a beeline straight for the dark haired man. “You want to explain to me what’s going on here, Sam Wilson?” Eyes narrowed, lips pulled into a tight line.

Upon seeing her he pushed himself out of his chair. “Val! How ya’ been? You been doing okay?”

“Oh cut the shit, Sam. You better have a good explanation for why I found out that Bucky not only had a warrant out for his arrest, but then ended up in a Baltimore jail leaving me to haul ass down here to figure out what in the hell is happening.” 

“First, I need you to calm down. Promise me you won’t freak out?” 

She glared at him. “Are you-” 

“Val,” he said in a stern tone. 

She let out a huff before nodding. “Alright, fine. I’m calm.”

“He helped me with that mission in Munich I told you about and then wanted to introduce me to someone in Baltimore. And he may have missed his therapy appointment in the process.”

“He missed-!” Val immediately yelled out, voice louder than anticipated, which drew the attention of the people around them. Sam put an arm around her shoulder and led the two of them over towards an unoccupied side of the room. “Sam, are you serious? He’s been doing so well! He put in so much effort to make sure he made the appointments and you let him go with you?”

“First of all, I told him repeatedly that I didn’t want him coming, but you know how stubborn he is.”

She let out a defeated sigh and dropped her hands to her sides. “So what do we do now?” 

“Well lucky for you they’re actually releasing him.” 

Before Val could reply she was cut off by the sound of heels clicking before a familiar voice spoke near them. “Sam. I’ve heard a lot about you.” She reached out to shake his hand. “I’m Dr. Raynor. I’m James’s therapist. It’s good to see you again, Valencia.” 

Val gave her a smile. “Good to see you too, doc.”

“So nice to meet you. You two already know each other?”

“I took Bucky to the first few of his appointments to make sure that he would, y’know, actually go. But that was before..” she waved a hand in the air, “everything.” 

Sam nodded. “Well thank you, Dr. Raynor, for getting him out.”

“Oh, that wasn’t me.” 

From across the room a booming voice spoke up, instantly grabbing their attention. “Christina!” The three of them all turned in unison and were met with none other than the new Captain America himself, taking pictures with a bunch of fans. “It’s great to see you again.” 

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You know him?” Sam spoke up with a frustrated sigh. 

“Yeah, we did some field ops back in the day.” 

“I heard you were working with Bucky, so I thought I’d step in.” Val watched as he approached the group, her arms instinctively crossing over her chest. “Miss Zicari, it’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve been trying to reach out for a formal introduction for several days now.”

“It’s Agent, actually. And unlike you I’ve had a lot of other pressing matters that required my attention.” 

“Right. Well, anyway. Bucky’s not gonna be following a strict schedule any longer.”

“What?”

“We haven’t finished our work. Who authorized this?”

“Um,” John used both hands to gesture up towards himself. “He’s too valuable of an asset to have tied up.” 

Val’s attention went from John to the sound of a metal door closing behind her. Her head turned towards the sound and she was met with none other than a familiar set of blue eyes side-eyeing the blonde man in front of her. She felt the corner of her mouth turn up in a half-smile as his head turned and saw hers. Almost instantly the token frown he wore at all times faded and turned into his own partial smile. She walked over to him, her arms finding their way around his neck subconsciously. “Hey, Buck,” she breathed as his arms wove around her middle, pulling their bodies flush together. 

“Hey to you too,” he said with a small laugh. “Pepper finally let you leave the compound?” 

She pulled away to look at him. “Less her letting me leave and more so her immediately getting me a flight and shoving me out the door when she found out you got arrested.”

“Alright lovebirds, break it up.” Dr. Raynor said from behind them. Val’s arms dropped to her side and before she had the chance to correct her, the woman spoke up again. “James, condition of your release, session now.” Bucky let out an audible groan, rolling his eyes slightly, to which Val couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle. “You too, Sam.”

“That’s okay, I’ll be out here with Val.”

“That wasn’t a request.” 

She pulled her phone from the pocket of her leather jacket and noticed an incoming call. “Just go, I’ll be outside. I gotta take this anyway.” Val walked outside of the jailhouse, sliding a thumb across the screen to answer the call in the process. She partially paid attention to what Pepper was telling her as the new Captain America walked past her, obviously checking her out with a side-eye as she leaned against the chipped bricks. Her eyes narrowed at him as he turned to steal another glance her way before turning her eyes away and down the opposite side of the road. 

“Yeah, he’s okay… no, I don’t know the specifics of how it works out with the pardon... I’ll keep you updated, but it doesn’t look like I’ll be back any time soon. I kinda feel like I’ll be joining the idiots on whatever they plan on doing next… Alright, I will. Keep me updated on the whole Westview situation and tell Morgan to stop stealing the snacks from my room. Oh, haha. Take care, Pepper.”  

As she hung up the phone she saw the door next to her swing open with a visibly angry Sam walking out of it. Bucky trudged out a few seconds later, looking angry but more upset than the man in front of him. As the door started to close behind him he saw Val and walked over to her.

“Do you think Steve was wrong about me?” She could tell he was fighting back tears by the way his voice cracked at the end.

Her hands cupped his face. “Bucky, no, absolutely not. Why would you say that?”

He looked away, not able to look her in the eye. After all the nights they spent together, her talking him down from a nightmare, reassuring him and chasing the negative thoughts away, he couldn’t admit that part of him still felt that same way. “It.. doesn’t matter.”

“If it’s making you this upset, then yes it does.” 

He let out a huff as her thumb began to lightly rub against the stubble on his cheek. “Sam shouldn’t have given up the shield.” 

“I know, Buck, I know. But there’s nothing we can do now, so let’s just try to figure out what’s happening with..” she lifted a hand from his face and used it to make vague gestures around them. “Everything right now.” 

The loud siren from a police cruiser halted their conversation, the sound making Val physically jump. She looked towards the source of the sound and scowled. This asshole again. “Gentlemen,” John’s eyes scanned Val’s figure quickly before adding, “and lady. Good to see you again.” Begrudgingly, she followed Sam and Bucky’s lead and walked towards the blonde haired man and his sidekick. ���Look, if we divide ourselves we don’t stand a chance, you guys know that.” 

Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “So what do you got?”

“Should she be hearing this?” John gestured to Val. 

She scoffed. “I’m on board now, so out with it.” 

“Alright. Well the leader’s name is Karli Morgenthau. We’ve been targeting civilians that have been helping Karli move from place to place. They geotagged a location, then scrambled the signal. But our satellites have found their symbol popping up in various displaced communities all across Central and Eastern Europe. We think that she's taking the medicine she just stole to one of these camps.”

“Well there’s been hundreds of those put up across the planet since The Blip,” Valencia interjected. “So I guess you’ll have to look real hard.”

“Good thing I have 20/20 vision, huh?” John shot back, annoyance prevalent in his voice.

“Where is she now, Walker? Do you know?” Bucky spoke up, patience quickly being stretched thin.

“No, we don’t know, Bucky,” Walker’s voice rose dramatically. “It’s only a matter of time before we find out.” 

Bucky cocked his head to the side, eyes narrowing at the man in front of him. “Things are really tense for you, aren’t they Walker?” Val rested a gentle hand against Bucky’s chest, holding him back as a reminder not to do anything irrational- although she definitely wanted him to. 

Sam approached the super soldier, putting a hand in the air to further make him back off. “Take it easy. Look, Walker’s right. It is imperative that we find them and stop them. But you guys have rules of engagement and all kinds of authorizations you have to get. We're free agents. We're more.. flexible. So it wouldn't make sense for us to work with you.” 

The trio started to walk off before Walker stood up from the cruiser and spoke. “A word of advice, then.” The three of them turned to look at him once again. “Stay the hell out of my way.” 

Knowing that it wasn’t worth it to get a final word in, Sam put a hand on either of their shoulders and pushed them to keep walking away. Once they were a reasonable distance down the street, Val turned to Bucky and noticed he was deep in thought. “What’s on your mind, Buck?” she asked with a hand coming up to rest on his shoulder. 

“Well, I know what we have to do. When Isaiah said “my people”...” he trailed off, still staring ahead. 

“Oh, don’t take that to heart. That’s not what he meant-” Sam tried to correct him before Bucky cut him off. 

“No, he meant HYDRA.” He paused for a moment, feet coming to a stop as he looked between the pair next to him. “HYDRA used to be my people.” 

“Bucky,” Val spoke up cautiously.”

Sam scoffed. “Not a chance.” 

“Walker doesn’t have any leads.” 

“I know where you’re going with this, no.”

“He knows all of HYDRA’s secrets. Don’t you remember Siberia.” 

“Oh, you cannot be serious,” Val said as she dragged a tired hand over her face. 

“So you’re just gonna sit in a room with this guy?” 

Bucky hesitated for a moment, obviously not thinking about his idea that much ahead of time. “Y-yes.” 

Val sighed, shaking her head slightly. “Out of all your ideas, this has got to be the dumbest.” She looked at Sam, who shrugged his shoulders and nodded. “Fine. Let’s go see Zemo.”

[piracytheorist]

Since the first thing that strikes me about re8, story-wise, is that it seems to be all over the place? Again, I’ve no idea how it ties to previous games but it feels like this parental/mother-child theme is just hanging there with no resolution at all? I mean yes, Ethan saved his daughter, presumably breaking some sort of abuse cycle, yay, congrats, but what about his wife/gf? Isn’t she supposed to be like the main protagonist of the story of a mother bereaved to the point of tyrannical madness

Or rather, this specific story is not the right choice for his character since there’s SO many ethical and philosophical issues and questions implied but never properly explored because of Ethan’s ‘fuck you, idc’ attitude (which is completely understandable in those circumstances but adds virtually nothing to the plot and arguably even ruins it a bit). Heisenberg could’ve been an excellent ally with fascinating grey morality (provided the writers wouldn’t push him to the point of absolute insanity and let freedom, not power-hunger be his main goal and motivation for rebellion).And again, aren’t the lords supposed to represent child development stages? In which case Ethan what? Kills the possibility of some evil version of Rose? Or his own chance to experience fatherhood throughout all of those stages? Either way, it seems a bit… weird to have a Parent destroy multiple people whose main relevance to the plot is that they’re children of an abusive antagonist in a storyline so extremely focused on parent/kid relationships.

I feel like the main theme of re8 is not just parenthood/motherhood, but the relationship itself of the parent to the child. There's a lot of mentions to "children being used". Miranda kidnapping people, experimenting on them and mutating them and then treating them like they're her kids; Miranda kidnapping and practically killing Rose; Dimitrescu making daughters out of reanimated corpses she experimented on; Heisenberg wanting to use Rose's powers, etc etc.

And it's important that Miranda is at the center of this. There's something very interesting she says to Ethan in her boss fight:

"Why do you interfere? Surely you have no need of Rose now, so close to death?"

And that's where her mistake was. Ethan wasn't doing all that because he needed Rose herself. He was doing it to save her, fully aware that he wasn't going to be a part of her life cause he knew he was dying. Miranda was way too dependent on her love for Eva - and like, I honestly get it that losing your child can devastate you (if anything my fear of that is one of the reasons I don't want to have kids) - so much that her life literally revolved around her child. Once Eva died, Miranda wanted to die. Once she found the Megamycete and discovered she maybe had a chance to bring Eva back, she dedicated her entire life and ruined multiple others to do just that. Her one and biggest need was to get Eva back. It wasn't a simple want or wish. It was a need. She'd get her child back, damn everyone else - including other people's children.

Miranda had no-one to blame directly; Eva had died from the influenza, it wasn't like she had any chance to change things. Ethan's case was different; he had people to blame, particularly, the one who kidnapped Rose and dismembered her, and her lackeys who kept said parts and fought him for trying to take them back.

So on one end, you have a parent who lost her child due to a tragedy, and ended up destroying other - innocent - lives in order to get her back. On the other, you have a parent who lost his child due to a crime, and ended up going after the criminals responsible in order to get the child back. Like, it wasn't even revenge, and it wasn't that he "needed" Rose in his life. He simply wanted to save her and ensure she'll be alright.

I fully agree it could have been Mia as the protagonist in re8, and that it was a wasted opportunity to simply fridge her and have her in the sidelines angsting over her husband. But whether it was Mia or Ethan as the protagonist, I feel like the theme that I explained above does offer a resolution, showing the opposites of Miranda and Ethan, and ending Miranda's tyrrany of her "need" to have her child back through Ethan's determination to ensure his child's safety and happiness - even if he doesn't get to be a part of any of that later on. Miranda showed obsession; Ethan showed dedication.

And this is how I see the abuse cycle breaking and the resolution is reached; an obsessed parent hurt a good parent's child to bring their own child back - the good parent's dedication stopped the former, allowing the former's tyrrany to end and their child to grow up safe.

Seeing as this is a horror game, I don't tend to focus on the morality issues (if I'm interpreting your second message correctly). Like, the developers are making a grant effort to put us in Ethan's shoes, first-person POV, plain character protagonist and all; our child got kidnapped and practically murdered, and we have the chance to bring her back. We'll absolutely raise hell to the people who are responsible for it and we will get our child back, fuck any moral dilemmas we might have. When someone is threatening your life, you have the ability to kill them to defend yourself. In the case of a caring parent, that ability may multiply by a lot when the threat is towards their child. And I feel that this is what the game explored in the end. Though the whole survival issue is taxing on Ethan, he doesn't give a damn about who he has to kill if it means saving his daughter - but again, it's only the responsible parties. We see how watching all the people at Luisa's house die affected him, and even before Elena died, he wanted to ensure her safety before he went searching for Rose; he is sympathetic and morally rational, but also capable of cold-blooded murder if someone is threatening his child. To a lesser extent, we saw that in re7 too. With his life on the line, he killed Jack (multiple times) and Marguerite, and at the end he recognized how they were actually victims of Eveline. But they were still actively trying to murder him so he wasn't given the chance to help them. With Zoe, he promised to send help, and he did, even wanting to talk to her once she'd been rescued by her uncle and Chris. The same applies to re8, but as I said, it's multiplied since it's his daughter who's in danger, and the end of re8 proves he cares for her safety more than his own.

Now, all that said, I think it's important to note how it's stil a Resident Evil game. I haven't actually played or watched any playthroughs of other games, but the basic concept in these games, from what I understand, is that the player shoots zombies; ex-human beings who have lost any human mentality and will just come for your throat if you don't kill them first. They're not humans anymore, they can't be reasoned or sympathized with. It's not really an issue of morality, ethics or philosophy. Your life, and the life of your child in the case of re8, are in danger. You don't give a shit. You just start shooting and hope for the best. Again, I don't know if the morality issue is explored in other RE games, but to be honest... Resident Evil doesn't sound like the kind of franchise that's thematically into going super deep into the morality of shooting zombies to save your life.

I have to admit I haven't thought of the Lords being representative of child development stages. I think they could be put as Moreau being a toddler, fully dependent on their parent - funnily enough, the Greek word for baby is "moro", pronounced almost exactly the way "Moreau" is pronounced in the game - Donna as a child, Heisenberg as a (rebellious?) teenager, and Dimitrescu as a late teen/young adult (if anything, Dimitrescu seems to behave like the eldest child of the bunch). But I'm not sure the connection that has to Ethan as a father, if anything because the bosses are fought in complete random order of age, if my analysis is correct. Like, I understand the symbolism behind the Lords' behaviours, maybe as you said they represent the obstacles Ethan had to overcome. In one single day and with his life on the line, instead of in the course of Rose's entire childhood and adolescence, but that's exactly why he hated being a protagonist of a horror game, lol.

Anyway, yeah. All in all, I don't think Resident Evil is a franchise where we should expect to sit down afterwards and ponder whether we were right to shoot the zombies that were trying to kill us. Again, I'm not the right person to ask this, since I don't know anything about other RE games, but that's the conclusion I'm making in a meta-thinking way.

[arlingtonpark]

SNK 139 Review Part I: On Eren Jeager and Genocide

Why?

Why is this happening?

Folks, I’m going to be honest here: there are no words for this. The main thrust of this chapter is completely inexplicable. It’s stupid. It’s ill conceived. FML.

Just…just the term itself is laughable.

Eren redemption arc.

Sksksksksksksksksksksk

After everything he’s done, everyone he’s killed, you’re going to try redeeming Eren in the final chapter?

Eren didn’t need to be redeemed. He was a bullheaded kid who didn’t let anyone stop him from doing what he thought needed to be done. He sees the titans outside the walls as enemies to be exterminated. When he learns that his real enemies are other humans, who have a right to freedom as much as he does, he can’t accept it and decides to just exterminate them too. That mindset led him down a tragic path of genocide.

That’s not a bad character arc!

In fact, I’d say it’s very compelling. Nonconformity and obstinance are often presented as virtues; flipping that paradigm on its head and showing the vices of those virtues was legitimately smart and provocative.

Making people rethink what traits are virtues and vices is a great moral to the story, and it paired well with the other moral of cooperation and loving your fellow people.

Then this chapter came out, and they threw all that away.

Eren’s arc once made me think of Aristotle, who argued that true virtue lied between extremes: neither too submissive nor too rebellious.

Now Eren’s arc makes me think of pseudointellectual 4chan philosophy, and dumb teenagers: “He’s not a bad guy, he’s just human!!!”

Eren’s motivations are a mess now. He had no free will, but he also had a plan, but deep down he wanted to do the rumbling no matter what, but actually he really wanted to be with Mikasa.

Oh, and B T dubs, he killed his mom too.

You can tell Isayama is desperate to make Eren as sympathetic as possible to justify making him the anti-hero because he’s throwing everything he can pull out of his ass at Eren.

Really, though, all he ended up doing was smearing shit on the character.

Eren’s plan was to kill a significant part of the human population so the world wouldn’t be as overwhelming a threat as before. Simultaneously, he planned (“planned”) for the alliance to become vaunted heroes to the world when they killed him, thus paving the way to peace.

This…makes no sense?

There is no reason Eren should have believed this would work. During the battle of Trost, Pixis asked him if humanity could unite if threatened by a common enemy. Eren said no.

Eren is a pessimist about people. He sees how much the walldians fought with each other and concluded that people would always be at odds.

And the Tybur family helped defeat the Eldian Empire, but only the Tyburs were seen as heroes by the Marleyans. That good will was not imputed from the Tyburs to the other Eldians on the continent. There’s no reason to think that would happen here when it didn’t back then.

I’m assuming, anyway, that the alliance becoming heroes is supposed to lead to a world where Paradis is safe since that’s supposed to be Eren’s goal.

I’m willing to grant that maybe this part of Eren’s plan was more of a hope on his part. Peace would come only after his death, so he can’t truly “plan” for anything afterwards.

I think it’s safe to say that killing the world’s population was the main part of his plan, since that’s the part he had the most control over.

To the extent he had any control over his actions, which brings me to the next point.

So, turns out Eren had no free will.

Can you not feel Isayama’s desperation?

After all the awful things Eren’s done, Isayama’s brilliant idea to make him sympathetic is to strip him of all agency.

This is done by two routes throughout the chapter.

The first is by building him up as a victim. Eren’s mind is fucked; he can’t really control himself. Any decent person would feel pity for him, which is reinforced by the sorrow Armin visibly feels for him.

Then, like a shotgun blast to the face, we are told that Eren killed his mother in a moment that is clearly supposed to endear us to him.

This is such a transparent appeal for our sympathy. Isayama’s desperation leaps off the page and mugs us of it.

The only thing that this revelation adds to the story is that it gives Armin a reason to take up Eren’s hand, and show him support. You can see Armin’s heart breaking for Eren in that moment.

That’s mostly why this is here: to give the mass murderer a hard luck story so our hearts melt for him.

The second route is that depriving Eren of agency absolves him of blame for what he did.

Eren beat Armin bloody, but you can’t really blame him for it. He was drugged out on the Founding Titan and didn’t want to do it. He was acting on impulse, just going with the flow, so he deserves, at the very least, some leniency.

Eren both having a plan and not having much in the way of free will is contradictory. Everyone still talks about Eren as if he’s someone who is doing stuff even though we’re told he’s not really capable of rational decision making.

I’m going to be nice and assume Isayama’s intent is that when you parse this all out, you end up in a place where Eren is not truly responsible for what he did, and in any event this all ended with the titan curse broken and the world at peace, sooooo break out the champagne everyone, we achieved world peace!

…

Yeah, bub, I’m not partying right now.

Isayama’s ploy to absolve Eren of blame didn’t work. Eren is still responsible for the people he killed and his Founding Titan lobotomy counts for shit. Turns out it helps to know how free will works when you’re writing about free will.

Free will is the quality of being in control of your actions, at least to the extent necessary to be held responsible for them.

Eren was just going with the flow (wonder what Annie thought of that…), acting on impulse, and getting dragged along by fate, but that’s not actually important.

It’s been known for centuries that current events are caused by previous events and that the current events will bring about future events in a never ending chain of cause and effect. One domino causes another to fall causes another to fall and on and on. This is called determinism.

And that’s ok because we free will exists. It exists even if we can’t do anything other than what we are going to do. It exists in spite of, or even arises out of, determinism.

This premise, that free will and determinism are not mutually exclusive, is the foundation for a family of theories about free will called compatibilism.

Compatibilist free will is the most popular theory of free will. There are a couple of variations on the basic idea, but the gist is that free will exists when your actions can be linked to an aspect of yourself that you identify with.

For example, if you had no choice but to do something, but you’re ok with that because it’s what you wanted anyway, then you have free will.

Even if I didn’t know you’d stop me in the end, I think I still would have flattened this world. 

-Eren Jeager

That’s all I needed to hear.

EREN, FUCK YOU!!!!

Eren had free will, at least as much as necessary to blame him for his genocide.

Isayama threw this curveball at us and all it did was ruin Eren as a character while leaving him just as repugnant as before. Incredible. It’s the worst of both worlds.

Before this chapter Eren was a guy who believed in something and followed that belief no matter who got in his way. That was great! It was tragic and sad, but great storytelling.

Where does this chapter leave us?

What we learn in this chapter is that Eren didn’t really believe in anything. He may have free will enough to be a shithead for what he did, but that doesn’t mean he has free will enough to be an interesting character.

Eren coming to grips with him not being free, in an absolute sense, would have been so much more interesting than what we got. Eren started the series comparing humanity to cattle in a pen. He ends the series being literally sheparded by fate to his death like cattle to a slaughterhouse.

And yet we get no exploration of that at all.

It’s lame. Everything about this is lame. From a storytelling perspective, Eren was just along for the ride. Who would want to reread this series now? A story about a boy who’s quest for freedom neither ends tragically nor happily, but is just forgotten about by the end. What’s the point?

There is none.

Eren’s journey ends up lost in the author’s own ignorance of the very thing this is supposed to be about.

Unfortunately, SNK isn’t interested in 80% of the world being dead. If it were, Eren wouldn’t have gotten such a warm send off.

I was honestly shocked when I read this chapter.

I thought it had been made clear. SNK had come firmly down against genocide. I never imagined Isayama would try a 180 in the final chapter.

And, well, he did, and here we are.

SNK is pro-genocide.

To wit:

Once Eren’s abominable plan is explained to everyone, he is lavished with love and comfort by his friends.

Armin did punch Eren for being callous about Mikasa, but overall all Armin had nothing but sympathy and understanding for Eren. They held hands and hugged and gave Eren a tender farewell.

All they talk about is how great a sacrifice Eren is making.

Not the sacrifice of 80% of all people, but the sacrifice that Eren personally is making of himself.

I don’t know what deranged mindset Isayama has that made him think this was sensible, but no, Eren is not sacrificing anything. He was always going to die. We’ve known this for several dozen chapters. It’s not a sacrifice to befall the fate you were always going to suffer.

He lost nothing. If anything, he gained from this ending.

Eren died knowing he was loved and appreciated by his friends. What more could a dying man ask for?

Eren is rewarded by the story for killing 80% of humanity.

His ultimate fate was no worse than was expected even before he committed the genocide, and he went out in the knowledge that his friends loved him for it.

It doesn’t even make logical sense that his friends would be so receptive to what he did.

There is no difference between Eren’s plan and what we thought Eren’s plan was before this chapter came out.

Armin thought Eren’s plan was to murder humanity to ensure his safety, and Armin was appalled. Armin was willing to sacrifice his life to ensure Eren failed. He was truly acting for the greater good of humanity.

In this chapter, Armin learns that Eren’s plan is actually to murder most of humanity to ensure his safety, and Armin loves him.

Again, hand holding, hugging, “thank you.” No mention of the unfathomable harm caused. The 80% killed are not even a footnote in this chapter.

Even after the fact, Eren’s friends showed no qualms with Eren essentially winning and procuring their safety through genocide.

When previously the mere thought of that was what motivated them to lay down their lives to stop him.

I don’t think Isayama believes this genocide is supposed to bear on how we think of Eren. I say, having just read the chapter that’s all about Eren, in which his genocide doesn’t bear on how his friends think of him. At all.

Was that too great a leap in logic? I apologize if my rationality offends you.

Eren may have died, but he won in the end.

His friends are safe and the world looks set to conclude a peace treaty with Paradis.

I don’t buy for a second that the world is a threat to Paradis anymore, and I don’t buy for a second that there won’t be a peace shortly after the end of the story.

It’s very telling, to me, that it’s the world that’s come to grovel at Paradis’ feet, begging for peace, when previously it was the other way around.

The contours of this “peace,” if you can call it that, were made pretty clear in the epilogue. The world is in ruins while Paradis is stronger than ever, so the world sues for peace for fear of Paradis attacking further. 

This is the moral of the story. Frankly, it’s been staring at us in the face the whole time.

How do you end the cycle of violence?

The answer is to win. To be stronger. More determined.

The only peace is enforced peace through domination.

Peace through the barrel of a gun.

To be continued in part II (and possibly part III)

[simonsrosebud]

How did Dalton react when he saw the famous Kathy interview with Niel Kev and Riko? I’d like to see how he reacted to that and all the post game interviews (especially the iconic Kevin one where he “has never gone skiing before”). I think Dalton must have come across one interview and just went down the rabbit hole. Maybe even Neil’s roasts?? Sorry this is a looong ask post

no i LOVE this!!

he knows he shouldn’t, not unless kevin says it’s okay, but dalton googles kevin after he leaves maryland to go back to south carolina.

it's not like he’s going to find anything bad.  and plus, he loves kevin.  and kevin loves him.  he’d just told him this week for the first time.

the top result is a buzzed article titled “kevin day had a near photoshoot with fans in times square, and we’re definitely jealous”.  below it are the most recent things like him coming out, and videos of him playing.

dalton refines his search.  specifically to last spring and fall.  his first year stepping onto the foxhole court as a player.

the first thing to come up is an interview with kathy ferdinand, neil josten, and riko moriyama.

dalton knows enough about riko moriyama for it to make his blood boil.

he also doesn’t realize that the brunette in the cover photo for the video is neil until he watches him get introduced to the stage.  he’s known from the second he saw neil that he’d been through some tough shit, but he didn’t realize it was all from last year.  the neil in the interview is clean.

also, he’s gawking over neil by the end of the interview.  he has to rewatch it to fully get it all.  kevin’s talked about neil and his attitude, and dalton’s experienced it maybe once, but holy shit he tore riko moriyama to shreds.

the only reason he isn’t laughing at how badass it is is because he can see how traumatized kevin looks.  if he hadn’t known him, he wouldn’t have noticed, but dalton knows his body language by now.  seeing him truly terrified with his abuser right there makes dalton want to wrap his arms around him.  he wishes he wasn’t already back in south carolina.

he runs his hands over his face and reruns neil’s words in his head.

“i don’t think you’re telling Kevin to sit out because of his health. i think you know this season is going to be a disaster for your reputation. you and kevin have always played in each other’s shadows. you’ve always been a pair. now you have to face each other on the court as rivals for the first time, and people are finally going to know which one of you is better. they’re going to know how premature this was. i think you’re scared.”

it gives him more insight on kevin and riko’s relationship, and while he wishes he never had to see it recorded, he’s glad he does.  with the way neil’s talking, it seems like he’d known all about it, too.  or else he wouldn’t openly be hating on riko the way he was.

after that, and after calming himself down from literally seeing kevin’s abuser and thanking god that he’s dead, he continues on.  the majority of the other videos are from press duty after games, and he clicks on a reoccurring one titled “KEVIN DAY NEVER BEEN SKIING???”  dalton knows this, and he also knows that the public thought that he’d broken his hand in a skiing accident, so he’s curious enough to click on it.

he gasps so hard.  it’s just such a blunt statement that so obviously dumbfounded all of the press trying to interview them.

he keeps going.

and they’re never-ending

“every time kevin day yells to neil josten in french”

or “29 times andrew minyard comes up behind kevin day but just stares into the camera”

“kevin day being approached by fans”

“kevin day and riko moriyama speaking japanese”  he doesn’t watch that one.

“compilation of neil josten being a pain in kevin day’s ass”  that one’s twenty-eight minutes long.

“kevin day looking stressed every time neil speaks”

“kevin day yelling neil’s name, except every time he does the pitch gets higher”

“kevin day’s fist pump every time they win a game”

“i ran into kevin day every time i went to eden’s nightclub last fall and had the same conversation about how to say croissant’s every time”  there’s videos from each time, some with the phone camera unknowingly recording him, some with the view of their chins from below, and some of the floor as if she “wasn’t recording”.  he doesn’t seem to remember her from before in any of the videos.  at the end there’s 7 pictures of them, with the same pose, all from different nights.  drunk kevin is funny.

dalton wishes he could see it, but he knocks that thought right out because he’s proud of kevin for being sober.

“speaking french with kevin day at the mall: AWKWARD”  that one is from this summer with subtitles at the bottom.  the girl goes up to him, and he doesn’t seem to see her coming until she’s in front of him.  “bonjour!”  kevin says, “oh, hello.”

when she continues in french to ask how his day is he makes the switch.  “do you speak english?”  “yes, i just knew you spoke french, sorry”  “oh… it’s okay, uh, do you mind not recording me?”  she lowers her phone a little.  “it’s still recording.”  “it’s not, anymore.”  “okay, well, i’ve got to go”  neil calls him you can see his feet shuffle.  “bye.”

then there’s one’s where he’s roasting interviewers.

“why don’t you smile for us?”  “smiling won’t make a difference in any of my answers.  next question.”

“you came out, just this week, to be dating a man.  any change in positions, if you know what i mean?”  she laughs.  kevin leans back, catching matt’s eye.  “what an embarrassing question.  that’ll be all.  matt, let’s go.”

“i’m sorry about the death of riko moriyama, but the way.  to have someone of a brother go in such a way must have been hard for you, yes?”  “well, good thing we were never brothers.”  he adds on.  “i don’t appreciate you actively trying to get a reaction out of me.  i think we’re done here?  yes?”

“now that he’s off his drugs, is andrew minyard a threat to the team?”  “why would you think that?”  “well, we all know his timeline, his history”  “time is a social construct.  i’ll go find andrew to take my spot, if we’re not going to focus on the game.”

“surely you guys must get plenty of girls drooling over you, with what such an intense workout regimen does!”  “girls aren’t animals.  educate yourself, please.”

that’s the one that dalton sends to carmen.  he can’t help it.   she loves it, texts him back a series of keyboard smashes and heart eye emojis.  A FEMINIST. 

the next time dalton uses his laptop it’s to look up a tutorial with kevin.  he stops and turns the screen when dalton scrambles to open a new tab.

“so how much have you seen?”

dalton cringes, but sinks into kevin’s side.  “kathy?  and... the croissants,” he whispers, and-

“jesus christ.”  kevin gets up and heads to dalton’s bathroom to shower.  “it’s pronounced croissant!”

[denimbex1986]

A Note On The Mistreatment & Bullying Of Sebastian Stan

@infinitecrime: Sebastian has never, ever said that he doesn't make mistakes, that he always gets everything right, that he has 0 ignorance or areas he could improve, or that all criticism of him in the world is simply mindless hate. In fact, quite the opposite. Throughout his entire career he's been uncommonly engaged with his fans, open to criticism, and commited to learning and getting better. He's consistently reminded us that he isn't perfect, he's human, and he makes mistakes.

He's still yet to directly call out the people who are making his life a living hell, but has, in recent interviews, hinted at how the toxic behaviour of the fanbase has been getting to him - particularly the hypersensitivity of fans who willfully dissect his every word to find something to bash him with, and will twist everything he does to be negative. It's ironic that his point has been proven tenfold by people picking apart his words and trying to make even his basic acknowledgement of what you have all being doing to him for the last year problematic. If you heard him taking about bullies and harassment and thought "hey, he's aiming that at me!", then I don't know what to tell you. Why do you see yourself in that description?

He's allowed to be affected by literally years of abuse and harassment. He's allowed to be upset by intense stalking and leaking of his home address (twice!) and phone number. He's allowed to be disturbed by people sending his friends and loved ones vile racist, xenophobic and misogynistic abuse on a daily basis and pretending that's somehow social justice. He's allowed to have a reaction to death threats, rape threats and countless messages telling him to kill himself. He's allowed to want freedom to make his own choices about his personal life without consulting a bunch of random kids. He's allowed to show human emotion and not want his life dissected and controlled by a mob of total strangers. He's allowed to react to near daily attempts to end his career and/or life over often made up or exaggerated bad faith accusations. He's allowed to call the people who have openly admitted their goal is "to bully him off the internet" what they are: bullies. And he is more than allowed to fucking stand up for himself and call out bullies and stalkers. He has a right to defend himself, to call out the abuse, and to be angry or sad about it. And he's been far more polite and indirect about all this than any of you deserve.

He's not "playing the victim". He is the victim. The only person who has had tangible harm done to them is him. Not you. He hasn't done anything to you. He hasn't sent you death threats, told you to kill yourself, or abused or stalked you. You cannot police the way he reacts or criticise him for struggling mentally after you've subjected him to a 3000 on 1, year long, 24/7 beat down. Relentlessly harassing someone and then mocking or criticising them for daring to react to it is such a typical abuse tactic I genuinely can't understand how you don't see what you are and what you're doing to another human being. You're not making the world a better place or achieving anything at all. You're not the good guy. You're no one's saviour.

The post above is HUGELY Important. Not just lately, as a result of the hatred, vitriol and crap Seb has had directed at him in recent days, but more generally. Some people forget that Seb is actually human - he has thoughts and feelings just like everyone else and it utterly appalls me the way some individuals have completely disregarded this fact. He has spent more than a decade in the spotlight - closer to two as a whole - and had to tolerate people giving him shit over various things on and off for years. 

Now, I’m all for people calling him out on inappropriate comments he’s made/things he’s done etc., but it must be noted he HAS apologized for most of these instances. What I don’t - and what no-one should support or condone - is people continuing to criticize him not just for such things he’s apologized for, and constantly dragging them back up, sometimes even years later, just to cast him in a bad light or in an attempt to “cancel” him, but in general; things like criticizing his projects and the way he looks etc. Nor should anyone support or partake in such appalling, disrespectful actions and behaviours such as stalking him or leaking his address and I’m sickened by the fact that some people have in fact done this. 

To think Seb - particularly as someone who has spoken time and time again about suffering with anxiety - wasn’t ever going to be or isn’t affected by any of this is utterly insane. If things like this were to happen to us, there is NO WAY we wouldn’t be affected, negatively, by it, so it is unfair to think or assume that Seb is or would be any different. He has every right to call the people who make his life miserable, particularly the scores of people who seem to take so much pride in tearing him down and criticizing him online bullies because that is exactly what they are. 

People have said he’s been wrong in the past few days to in some way hint at or address the actions of some people/their intrusion/obsession with him and constant barrages of hatred etc. in his recent interviews. NO. HE’S NOT. He’s used and is using the platform he has to get a message across - just as those who spout and direct shit at him do - that he is aware of what people are saying and doing, and that it does affect and is affecting him. The fact he’s done it so politely is testament to his character, and as @infinitecrime says above, such politeness is far more than the bullies and haters deserve. 

The fact of the matter is Seb is and will forever be a far better person than any of those who find pleasure in causing him harm; emotional, mental or otherwise. He is a person who brings pleasure to the lives of millions of people, not only through his work, but through his kind heart and his compassion. He has had and continues to have an ultimately positive impact on this world and for that he should be very proud. The same cannot and should not be said for those who find joy in bringing and causing him pain.

[somethingwritey]

sneak peek: “run to you” - a rangshi longfic

💖 i am currently working on a rangshi longfic (50k words at the moment) that i’ll eventually publish on ao3. it takes place directly following the events of The Shadow of Kyoshi by F.C. Yee. 

💖 my writing commissions are open! message me with commission requests or questions! 

💖 here’s a sneak peek of “run to you”! 

--- 

Kyoshi had blood on her hands.

Quite literally, at the moment.

She stared down at her palms and fingers, hoping they didn’t shake as badly as she feared.

She knew she needed to wash the weight of Rangi’s blood away, watch it swirl down her arms and out of sight, as if that alone could wipe away the pain she’d caused her girl, but for some reason, Kyoshi couldn’t seem to move her feet.

Every part of her felt heavy and languid, and it was hard work to imagine that these were the same limbs that had carried, defended, and healed only hours ago. Kyoshi wanted to curl up into a ball and wait for someone else to save the world for once.

Because that was the oh, so incessant problem about Avatarhood. No matter how many messes Kyoshi cleaned up, there were still new terrors cropping up the moment she sat down to catch her breath. It was exhausting. Behind all the makeup and armor, she was still the servant girl in the mansion - tasked with the never-ending job of cleaning up.

“You saved her life.”

Kyoshi lifted her head to see Hei-Ran, standing only a little less poised than usual. The teetering fate of Rangi had taken a toll on even the most rigid members of her group.

“I did my duty.” The words came out defeated, as if Kyoshi had lost instead of won. Then again, with Yun’s grey body lying somewhere inside the ruined mansion waiting to be put to rest, and a bloodied Rangi being tended to by Atuat, maybe she couldn’t claim victory after all.

Peace comes at a price.

She heard the words in Lao Ge’s voice, although she was fairly certain he’d never actually uttered them to her.

“You did far beyond that, Avatar.” Hei-Ran thought about it for a moment, then took a seat beside her - flicking her robes out behind her as she did. “You should be honored for what you’ve done.”

“Yeah, except no one will even know!” Kyoshi slammed her fists down on the ground, causing a small tremor beneath them. “Zoryu’s made sure of that! He gets all the credit, and all he’s done is sentence an innocent man to death!”

This outburst probably wouldn’t win her any favor in Hei-Ran’s eyes - the woman so committed to her duty that she’d willingly sacrificed her hair and honor to acknowledge her failures - but Kyoshi couldn’t help it.

Her first choice for a confidant would’ve been Rangi, of course. Or maybe Kelsang. But with the latter dead and the former barely conscious, she supposed the old headmistress would have to do. The woman had claimed Kyoshi as a daughter back in North Chung-Ling. Perhaps that warranted a bit of sympathy or at least a listening ear.

“The Fire Lord’s job is complicated,” Hei-Ran stated. “As is yours. You’ve both been tasked with the impossible: governing a world that does not wish to be governed by you. Chaos is the natural order, Kyoshi, as much as we pretend it is not. The Fire Nation must go to great lengths to maintain our control. Even if it… requires some bloodshed.”

“I didn’t ask for this.” Kyoshi shook her head. She no longer felt the dull aching in her chest that used to come with a reminder of her station, but that didn’t mean the Era of Kyoshi hadn’t been stained with blood and confusion and deceit. 

“The Spirits chose you.”

Why?

The plaintive question would’ve made her sound like a child, so Kyoshi sealed her lips and kept the pleading inside. She wanted answers. And since Hei-Ran would understand nothing more about the mysterious methods of the spirits than she did, Kyoshi decided to at least start with something the woman stood a chance at knowing.

“Was Rangi mad?” She rubbed the side of her face and dried blood flaked off, fluttering towards the ground. “When I left, I mean.”

A ghost of a smile flitted across Hei-Ran’s face. “Enough to shoot flames out of her ears.”

For a moment, Kyoshi tried to picture it - a steaming mad Rangi, with her face boiling red and fists clenched into tight balls. The last time she’d gotten that upset, the Firebender had flipped a table off a balcony. For a moment, the memory tugged at the corner of Kyoshi’s mouth - lifting it into a lopsided smile. 

And then the moment passed.

“I’m sorry I killed your daughter.”

Hei-Ran frowned. “You healed her, Kyoshi.”

Only after Rangi had traveled to fight alongside the girl who’d locked her into the ground and put her mother on a possible death bed. “Because I put her in danger. It doesn’t count. Doing right by her after that was just… canceling out the bad.”

Kyoshi felt like she’d been doing that her whole life: making mistakes and then fixing them. It didn’t seem right to take the credit for something she’d messed up in the first place.

You were the one innocent party, Yun had told her. Oh, if only that were the truth.

“Hei-Ran?” Atuat had emerged from the infirmary, traveling up to where Kyoshi and the headmistress sat. Hei-Ran was on her feet immediately, but whether to appear respectable in front of the doctor or out of fear for what news she’d bring, Kyoshi couldn’t be sure.

“How is she?” Kyoshi found her way to her feet as well, Atuat’s presence sending a fresh wave of worry down her spine.

“Oh good, Kyoshi’s here, too. Saves me a trip.” Atuat took her time reaching them and with each passing moment, Kyoshi found herself more and more on edge. By the time the Waterbender made it over, she could feel her body vibrating again.

“Well?” Hei-Ran demanded, clearly just as impatient as Kyoshi, but with better control over her exterior.

“She’s asleep.” Atuat’s manner always confused Kyoshi a bit. She never seemed exhausted by the threat of death. Perhaps she’d just become too acquainted with it, or maybe mastering the power of healing made her immune to the fear. Either way, she always emerged from battle hospitals like she’d finished a rather routine examination.

“Will she be okay?” Kyoshi remembered the crunch of earth as it impaled Rangi’s back. The way the blood had rushed away from her lips. How she’d looked up at her as the life drained away. “Is the damage permanent? I know I didn’t heal her right. I tried my best, but -”

“Kyoshi.” Atuat held up her hand. “Rangi is a strong girl. She’s going to be alright. In pain, certainly, but in the end alright.”

Kyoshi exhaled shakily, barely able to keep it together enough to thank her.

“You need rest, too, Avatar,” Atuat pressed, motioning down towards the infirmary. “There’s a spare bed down the hill.”

The last thing Kyoshi wanted to do was sleep. How could she just let herself clock out when Rangi needed caring for? When the Flying Opera Company was wounded? When Jinpa still hadn’t come down from his medicine high due to her own poor measurements?

As if Atuat could read her mind, the doctor narrowed her eyes. “That monk is off his rocker. You gave him too much.”

“Sorry, sifu.”

“Rest, Kyoshi,” was the only response she got in return. “And take off those clothes. You’ve got blood all over you.”

///

“I can feel you staring at me.”

Kyoshi jumped a little, hurriedly switching her gaze to the other side of the room and away from Rangi’s bed before deciding hiding it was futile. The Firebender hadn’t moved in over two hours, but apparently, the wounded girl was more perceptive than Kyoshi had anticipated.  

“I thought you were sleeping!” Kyoshi whispered, doing her best not to disturb Kirima and Wong, who were asleep in their respective wooden beds.

“I’m resting.” Rangi still hadn’t opened her eyes. “A concept you might not be familiar with.”

A hum of relief ran through Kyoshi’s arms. If Rangi was well enough to give her shit, then maybe that meant the girl would be alright after all.

“I know how to rest.” Kyoshi crossed her arms and did her best to look wounded.  

“Yeah, and Jinpa’s a murderer.”

Kyoshi glanced over at her secretary, who was propped up against the wooden headboard and still singing to himself in dulcet tones.  

“Kyoshi, please try to sleep,” Rangi pleaded.

Easier said than done. Sitting still seemed too difficult for Kyoshi at the moment, let alone actually falling asleep.

“Yeah, well,” Kyoshi mumbled offhandedly. “I’m not really keen on seeing you die again in my dreams.” It came out sounding more dire than she’d meant.

Only then did Rangi open her eyes, staring at Kyoshi from across the way. “I’m fine.”

It would’ve been a lot more convincing if her hands weren’t locked tight around the thin cotton sheets, compensating for some sort of pain she must be feeling.

“Fine?” Kyoshi stared at her incredulously. “You were stabbed.”

“Can you two please keep it down?” Kirima suddenly cut in, gesturing to her splinted leg. “Some of us are trying to heal!”

Apparently, her ability to tell who was asleep badly needed fine-tuning.

“Noise won’t delay that process!” Kyoshi shot back, trying to keep her smile at bay. She really had missed her friends.

Silence fell back over the infirmary, and Kyoshi allowed herself to lean against the headboard for the first time all night. She drew in a shaky breath, basking in the safety she felt around the Flying Opera Company - even if their legs were broken.

It was a few minutes before Rangi spoke again, lowering her voice to whisper in that raspy way of hers. “You’re pretty far away, you know.”

At first, Kyoshi wanted to protest that of course her energy was distant - she’d killed one of her closest friends and nearly lost the other one - before she realized Rangi was speaking literally. She closed her mouth. Hard.

A little too hard, actually. Her jaw still ached where Yun had thrown the discs.

Rangi even managed a little grin. “Do you think Atuat will kill you for sleeping with a patient?”

Giddy with the idea of lying beside Rangi again, Kyoshi slid out of bed and made her way over to the other side of the room. She’d flirted with the idea of climbing in before, but with Rangi’s fragile state, she hadn’t wanted to cause any more damage than she’d already done.

“You’re not gonna break me,” Rangi mumbled, but Kyoshi still saw her struggle to make space in the small frame.

“This is a bad -”

“Will you quit worrying and just crawl in, please?” Rangi did her best to pat the bed beside her, wincing horribly. “I’ve suffered worse.”

“Mmm, what a terrible fate,” Kyoshi grinned, finally allowing herself to gingerly lie down beside Rangi. “Sleeping next to Kyoshi. What an awful - hey!”

Rangi had elbowed her in the ribs. She tried to laugh, but it barely masked the tremor behind it.

“Stop hurting yourself,” Kyoshi hissed, laying an angry kiss on the Firebender’s cheek. “I mean it.”

In response, Rangi moved to curl up closer against Kyoshi’s chest, her eyes falling shut again. For a long while, they stayed just like that - Rangi in too much pain to move and Kyoshi too nervous about causing her any more. It felt awfully reminiscent of the first time they’d shared a bed, with Kyoshi awake all night inhaling the smell of Rangi’s hair against her lips.

Kyoshi had vowed to protect her then, and she still wanted to protect her now. She didn’t miss the way Rangi’s face screwed up as she slept, sleep inhibiting her ability to hide the discomfort. A couple of times, Atuat came to check on her. She clicked her teeth together at the sight of Kyoshi in the bed, but didn’t seem altogether surprised. The doctor didn’t force her away either, something for which Kyoshi was eternally grateful.

In the blue-grey hours of the morning, Kyoshi finally succumbed to the heaviness in her eyelids - letting them shut as her head fell back against the headboard - at last, too tired to worry about any new dangers coming for them that night.

-----

💖  that’s all for now :) i might post a little more soon! i’m very excited to get this up on ao3 in the near future!

💖 if you enjoy my writing and want to commission me, send me a message! my commissions are open! 

💖 keep an eye out for more commissioned pieces coming soon :)