#luke my precious son hes so SHAPED

[shootingstarrfish]

hello have you seen this boy?

now you have :)

[theprayerfulword]

April 30

Luke 6:36 Be ye…merciful, as your Father also is merciful.

Ephesians 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

Isaiah 41:10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

Philemon 1:6 I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ.

1 Corinthians 9:25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.

Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; 24 and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.

May you know that your past and your history is not who you are, for in Christ you have been made a new creation, cleansed and transformed into pliable, mold-able material for the Lord to shape into His appearance. Therefore allow the truth of His Word and the power of His Spirit to change your heart of stone to a heart of flesh and learn to walk, not in your carnal understanding, but in the reverent obedience and fearful awe of the Lord. Judges 11

May you not have confidence in your strength or reliance in your wisdom, but grow in the knowledge of the grace of God. Enter into the trusting reliance and rest of the Lord, Who is the Beginning and the Conclusion, and has made plans at each step to do you good in the end, being the Author and Completer of your faith. He has prepared your required provision, both spiritually and materially, for each day and each need, that He may be your Source. Therefore give Him the glory which is His due and the praise for which He is worthy. Judges 11

May you submit to the One Who saves and rescues you, yielding your will to His, acknowledging His strength that brings you victory, and confessing His right to receive your obedience and labor in His service, knowing that in His proven love for you, no eternal harm will be done, though the work may be hard and the assignments may prove painful, for His grace is sufficient and His joy is never-ending. Judges 11

May you give to the Lord the honor and respect due to Him through the faithful usage and obedient employment of all that you have received from Him, for you have nothing that has not come from the Lord your Provider. Judges 11

May you walk in the Spirit of God with the fortitude of mind, the courage of heart, and the zeal for the Lord as you obey the King of kings, both in overcoming the enemies of the Lord that oppress the inner land of your soul, cleansing it for His holy presence to dwell therein, and in the humble servitude to others through which the kingdom of God is extended, knowing that by your seeking His will and faithfully obeying, His praise will be declared by His people and His glory will be shown to the world. Judges 11

May you encourage others in their struggles and rejoice with others in their victories, not quarreling in jealousy or contending in pride, but joining in care for one another, expressing acceptance in diversity, extending grace through maturity, and demonstrating love in unity, esteeming others with the significance the Father bestows upon them, Who considered them precious enough for His Son to die for them. Judges 12

May God grant that you enjoy the fellowship of the Lord and walk peacefully with your brethren as a productive and useful servant of your Master, with a clean heart toward Him and a peaceful mind toward others. Judges 12

I am of no use to you, My child, if you only know about Me. The words used by others to describe Me can paint a realistic-appearing portrait of Me in your mind, but they can only encourage you to know Me for yourself. Their words in your ears can never be a substitute for hearing My words speaking life into your heart, for the portrait is never the person. Knowledge of My acts, knowledge of My words, even knowledge of My ways may see you through when events are calm and the water is unruffled. But in the turmoil which you will be facing you must know the Person in Whom you believe and to Whom you need to call in order for your faith to catch traction and be of any benefit. Faith in a concept will not see you through – you will need to catch My hand in order to keep from sinking.

May the Word, which was in the beginning, dwell richly in you, and may the life of the Word be the light that those in darkness see from you. John 1

May you receive the One Who made the world, believing in His name, that you may receive the right to become one of His children, born of God. John 1

May you receive the grace and truth which comes through Jesus Christ, Who fulfilled the law which was given through Moses, for from the fullness of His grace we have all received one blessing after another. John 1

May you sing praise to the Lord because of His love and justice, and be careful to lead a blameless life so you will be ready when He comes to you. Psalm 101

May you walk in your house with a blameless heart before God because you set before your eye no vile thing. Psalm 101

May the transgressions of those powers and principalities which choose not to follow the way of the Lord fail to cling to or grasp hold of you and may you reject devious and perverse ideas, being intimate or involved with nothing of evil. Psalm 101

May you put to silence any influencing whispers in your mind which slander your neighbors in secret, and may you not tolerate, or walk in agreement with, any authorities or powers which have haughty eyes and a proud heart. Psalm 101

May you search out the faithful in the land that you may keep their company, and may you accept ministry from those whose walk is blameless and follows the way of integrity. Psalm 101

May you understand that the sorrow of this life and pain of your struggles are a part of the growth that God leads us through, faithfully attending you and never forsaking you, even as Christ, in the midst of His triumphal entry to Jerusalem, carried in His heart the approaching burden of the cross, which He endured for the eternal joy of bringing many to the Father. Proverbs 14:13

May you be satisfied from above, as a good man is, and your soul filled with awe toward the Lord whereas a heart that turns from God becomes bored with its own ways and the disloyal or faithless one will pay for his behavior. Proverbs 14:14

[jarrodwbrown]

Remember Lot's Wife

It looked a bit like a scene from the classic comedy sitcom Sanford and Son.  I finished loading my truck late Friday night.  The tarp covering the boxes of personal belongings and precious memories was tightly secured.  Saturday morning I’d be pulling out early to make the 12 hour drive to Houston.  This would be the beginning of the rest of my life, okay maybe not the rest of my life but it would mark the beginning of a new chapter.  

(not actually my truck)

Saturday morning was beautiful, it was cool and low humidity, the perfect summer morning in middle Tennessee.  I drove across the bridge on the edge of my farm and pulled onto the highway and in just a few minutes I was on Interstate 40 headed west.  Moving is always stressful, so much to do, so much to get taken care of, but there’s also a feeling of excitement as you look to the new adventure that you’re embarking on, perhaps a new job opportunity, a promotion at your current job, maybe its a bigger house for your growing family, or perhaps you’re moving to go to college, whatever the case it’s usually exciting.  My move is less than exciting and a bit more humbling.  I’m moving to Houston, Texas where at 47 years old my son, Levi and I, will be moving in with my parents, at least for the short term.  I set the cruise control at 80, checked my side mirror, and looked back at a long highway that seemed to be growing longer behind me as I moved further away from a life that once was.  

Looking back is something that we often do.  History in and of itself captivates me, what happened at a particular moment in time, what events led to that moment, and then what came from it.  A quick scroll through the camera roll on my phone can bring up some incredibly nostalgic emotions, in particular seeing my children grow up, I can flash through 20 years of life in a matter of minutes.  And in doing so I can feel a wave of emotions come over me, like a sudden ocean wave that can catch you off guard on what was an otherwise pleasant time at the beach, these emotions can knock you off of your feet as easily as that unsafe ocean wave can.  I can begin to think of the “should have’s”.  The “should have’s” is a dangerous place to visit and once visited it is so tantalizing to hang out there, and even worse to dwell in this place.  The “should have’s” represent a certain level of fault, blame or guilt that we feel for how it was or how we were or how we did or perhaps how we didn’t.  While a quick visit to this place might be beneficial in order to recognize how much you’ve done to get to where you are today, in whatever aspect it may be, that quick visit is rarely just a quick visit.  The struggle that presents is that the nostalgic emotions that roll in like a wave when there for a quick visit can quickly turn into a time of hanging out and if we let down our guard we will find ourselves dwelling there.  Once this has occurred we all too often forget that it was not in spite of the “should have’s” that God has made us who we are today or that God has allowed us to achieve what we have achieved today, rather it’s very much because of what we learned from those past experiences that shaped who we are today.  Without those experiences it is very likely that we would not be who we are today.  When I put that into perspective then I’m able to better understand Chrsit’s words in Luke 17:32 when he says, “Remember Lot’s wife.”  When God spared Lot, his wife, and his two daughters from the looming destruction that was planned for Sodom and Gamorra he specifically told them to not look back.  I don’t believe that these instructions were because the destruction of Sodom and Gamorra was to be like looking at a welding arc, whose bright glow can severely damage the unprotected eye.  I believe that God said don’t look back because that place, that life, those memories were not beneficial, they were not Holy, they would not serve any purpose in the new life that God was planning for Lot and his family.  But not looking is hard.  Just about every kid who has ever spent time in a shop with someone welding learned the hard way why they were told not to look.  No matter how badly they tried to not watch the welder at some point they couldn’t resist any more.  Hopefully for most, like myself, we ended up with only a slight burning in our eyes that was gone by the next morning.  Obviously Lot’s wife learned the hard way as well.  God knows what he’s talking about.  

Lot’s wife looked back.  It’s understandable.  Why?  Because we want to see, we enjoy looking back, remembering what was, feeling nostalgic.  As evil and perverse as Sodom and Gamorra were, it was their home.  Undoubtedly Lot’s wife had many friends there, undoubtedly they had many family memories there, and as bad or even toxic as the environment was, it was familiar, it felt safe, it was known.  The unknown, also referred to as the future, is scary for many of us.  The unknown requires a level of faith that most of us want to have but find ourselves falling short day after day and year after year.  Perhaps that’s why we struggle so hard to not look back.   Looking back is familiar, and even as toxic and unsafe as it might have been in Sodom and Gamorra, the familiarity of it created a false sense of security for Lot’s wife.  

Whatever you’re facing right now I encourage you to be present in this moment.  Don’t allow yourself to hang out and even worse, dwell on what events took place to get you here, just be present.  Don’t look back.  And as tempting as it may be, be careful at looking too far into the future, it can oftentimes create as much, if not more, anxiety than dwelling in the past.  Christ knows that, that’s why he also commands us to not worry about tomorrow!  Be the best version of you today, whatever that looks like, rest tonight, and do it all over again tomorrow.  

So, here’s to NOT looking back.  Here's to a new chapter.  Here’s to spending some long overdue quality time with my parents.  My past, while it hardly compares to that of Lot and his family, nonetheless is marked by some less than ideal moments, I think most of us can agree with that statement.  I’m excited about what lies ahead, about new adventures, new experiences, new relationships, and new memories to add to my camera roll.  I hope that you’ll be a part of those as well!!  If you’re in the Houston area, don’t be surprised when I reach out to see about grabbing a coffee! 

[cherryblossomriot]

i had a dream the other day that was basically a dinluke cowboy au and it has been HAUNTING me, so just allow me to deposit it upon you like my subconscious drop kicked it onto me:

Luke is a disabled veteran who has returned from war one hand lighter and several scars heavier. When he returns, his family, who are heavily involved in the politics/military of this fictional land, don’t understand his now jaded and melancholic view of both the world, but also the ideologies that they so strongly believe in, leading him to constantly feel like an outcast even among the people that he so dearly loves. They’re all passionate and strong-willed, but they still don’t understand, not his struggles with mental health or his new perspective, and it just makes things worse and worse and worse. Anakin is a general, and though he’s seen the gruesomeness of war firsthand, he’s also become desensitized to it and has anger-management issues, so he often almost finds a sort of refuge within the chaos of battle, so he clearly cannot even fathom the emotions and trauma that Luke is trying to sort through, much less know how to deal with them properly. Padme is a senator and cares deeply about the crimes and seemingly senseless violence occurring during the war, but she’s also a politician and knows how to play the long game, so when Luke comes to her, he leaves feeling misunderstood and pushed aside. Leia is the only one who seemingly understands, as the pair of them have a deep, intrinsic bond, but she doesn’t fully grasp Luke’s moods and doesn’t handle his breakdowns and flashbacks well. So everyone feels a little upset, a little unsettled, and a lot like they don’t understand why and how Luke has changed, which leads to Luke feeling more and more out of place within his own family. The war ends relatively soon after Luke’s return, which leads to parades which leads to awards which leads to balls and banquets, all of which Luke is forced to attend, his heart dragging but his head held high, because he’s an Amidala-Skywalker goddammit, and we have a certain responsibility and image to maintain to the public and everyone who endured so much. So Luke has to sit there through awards and boasts of glory and mentions of battle scars and it goes on and on and on, and he has to smile and bear it and accept the medal that they’re giving him because he did such a great service to his country and-he has a panic attack. A nasty one that leads to him having to flee from a ballroom, and outside to the gardens. Once he’s there, he realizes that he doesn’t want to go back in. At all. So he runs away. He just picks a direction and goes, stealing a car on the way (this is a modern au but also fictional countries because I don’t want to get into real politics, hooo boy no siree). In the middle of nowhere, he gets caught in a storm and basically crashes his car and passes out. 

But when he wakes up! That’s when the fun begins. 

He’s in this cozy sort of bedroom, and this hot guy is fast asleep in the chair beside his bed, and is that a little kid in his lap? Anyway, the hot guy wakes up, introduces himself as Din Djarin in the softest, most attractive voice Luke has ever heard with his own two ears, and doesn’t ask him where he’s from or what he was doing driving in the middle of bumfuck nowhere at 3 in the morning, so Luke is obligated to have a lil crush on him, even though he’s not sure about the kid. So he asks, and Din introduces him to his son Grogu, who waves at him and signs hello, because, as Din explains, he doesn’t speak much, and the foster system wasn’t too kind to him, so he’s got a little bit of trauma to work through. And Luke just, instantly falls in love with this soft dad and his cute little son who can shift his features from the biggest, most pleading puppy eyes ever to the face of a demented gremlin who will try to eat the frog he caught in the backyard, no matter how slimy it is, or how hard it tries to wriggle out of his hands. Din tells Luke that he can stay for however long he needs, because Luke’s kinda injured from his accident, and anyway, once he’s healed up, they always could use another hand on the farm. So Luke stays, and he meets all of Din’s other farm hands (and shitty friends). There’s Boba, who doesn’t talk much, but when he does it’s always something slightly ominous and menacing, and Luke thinks that his name sounds familiar...hey wasn’t he on the news for robbing a couple banks a few years back?...no, surely not..., Fennec, who speaks even less than Boba, and manages to be far, far more intimidating, but also helps Luke with his prosthetic and gives him fun little tips that always sound more like she’s cut off a lot more limbs than she’s lost. Cara Dune (who is not gina carano but i digress) is also there, and she’s just constantly a harbinger of chaos, but will babysit Grogu whenever Din wants to brood and stare longingly into the distance (or at Luke who’s also brooding as the sun sets but shhh). Bo-Katan and the gang are there, and while Bo-Katan grumbles about how the old ranch boss had different/better methods on how to run things, she still follows Din’s lead and helps him with the finances and taxes. They all take to Luke like a wildfire, because Luke is a sunshine boy who can make friends with literally anyone and somehow manages to make Din not only smile but laugh, but also because they can tell he’s got a lot of trauma and pain bubbling just under the surface, and they all silently but collectively agreed a long time ago that they are the patron saints of troubled and lost souls. 

When Luke gets better and starts to help out, he’s constantly upset with himself because he used to help out at his aunt and uncle’s farm in the summers when he was a kid, and he knows how to do this stuff, but his prosthetic is really throwing him off and his body has sustained a lot of other injuries that make doing manual labor a much more different experience than it used to be, but everyone is really patient with him and helps him out, especially Din. At one point, Din is so nice that Luke just loses it, because he doesn’t understand how Din can be so kind and so patient, and care about him so much, and kind of calls himself broken and useless in front of Din, and Din gets super protective and grabs his hands (real and prosthetic) and tells him that he’s not broken or useless, and you’re so sweet and wonderful, and can’t you see? Ever since you’ve been here, everyone’s been so much happier, so much lighter. You’ve brought something precious to us, but most of all to me. And they’re standing really close and for a second Luke thinks Din is going to kiss him, but instead, Luke realizes that he’s crying, and Din just wraps his arms around him and holds him.

After that, time sort of blurs, marked by things like Grogu climbing into Luke’s bed because he sensed that he was having a nightmare, and Din waking up to find the pair of them coloring in a serene silence, Luke getting the hang of ranch life and his prosthetic and dealing with his panic attacks and flashbacks as they come, and Din enduring relentless badgering from his friends because hey, if you don’t marry Luke, I will and Fennec, you’re a lesbian and that doesn’t matter, it’ll be a marriage of twink and butch solidarity. And all the while, Din and Luke are spinning closer and closer towards each other, two suns hurtling in their orbit to the other with an inescapable certainty. 

When it finally happens, they’ve just gotten back from one of those cowboy dances (idk what they’re called...hoedowns? yeah okay) (and yes, I wanted to hit all of the cliches in the book, thank you very much), and Grogu’s fallen fast asleep on Luke’s shoulder. After they tuck him up all snug in his bed, they head out to the porch, because it’s raining outside, and the steady thrum of water droplets splattering on the roof and on the grass is the most soothing sound Luke has ever heard (aside from Din’s voice), and he’s a little too afraid to go to sleep and ruin his perfect night with a nightmare. They stand there for a while, silence binding them together, shoulders brushing every now and then, hesitant and questioning. Luke thinks about how Din had asked him to dance earlier, his lips tilted in a teasing, but achingly soft smile, and how his heart had pounded a tattoo to the shape of his ribs when they’d pushed up so close together, the fast, rowdy dances of the beginning of the night having faded to something lasting, something meaningful. Luke remembers the ball he’d run away from, how the dancing had been cold, almost jeering in a way, and Luke realizes how far he’s come, how different it is here. And suddenly, there isn’t a question in his mind anymore. He turns toward Din, who turns toward him, and when he leans forward, Din breathes an uncertain “Luke-”, but he doesn’t get to finish the thought. Luke kisses him, and he kisses back, and it’s just them. There are hands in hair and noses nudged together, and at some point, they move, without either of them releasing the other, into the house and into Din’s bedroom. Buttons are unbuttoned, and whole stretches of skin are kissed, and when it’s over, they curl up together, Din tucking his head into the crook of Luke’s neck and falling asleep there. 

When they wake up, Luke explains why he came here, why he ran away, all the while Din looks at him with his beautiful dark eyes and runs his hands through Luke’s hair, which is catching the sunlight filtering in through the window and making him look like he has a halo, all the while never once condemning him for keeping it a secret this whole time. After he’s finished, he expects some sort of shocked reaction-after all, his family’s pretty famous, but all Din does is kiss him and ask, “Wait, so you have a twin?” 

It’s so unexpected that Luke throws his head back and bursts into uncontrollable, and very contagious peals of laughter, and when he’s finally able to breathe again, he kisses Din’s forehead and murmurs, “I love you.” 

Din, who has been touch starved and lonely for years (no time for relationships when you’ve got a business to run and a toddler to raise), tears up and kisses him, too overwhelmed for words. But Luke understands.  

And then Grogu pushes his way into the room holding up a box of Frosted Flakes above his head and shaking it, as if to say, I’d like to eat now, please. 

Din and Luke stifle their smiles into the other’s shoulder, and when they get up, Luke can’t help but think that he’s finally where he belongs.

----

It takes approximately .5 seconds for all the others to figure out they’re together now, and Cara and Bo-Katan (of all people) start cheering immediately, to Din and Luke’s shock. Boba and Fennec grumble and begrudgingly hand over a huge wad of cash each to Cara and Bo-Katan because they thought it would take them at least another two weeks to get together. Din’s very done with his friends at this point, but he takes one look at Luke’s flustered but smiling face and decides he won’t kill them all this time. 

And if everyone thought Luke was a lot of excitement for a humble ranch in the middle of nowhere, then they are in no way, shape, or form, prepared for when his very angry twin sister shows up with a himbo with a shit-eating grin and his 7 foot tall best friend she hired to track her brother down. 

(needless to say, Boba punches Han within two minutes of interaction).

[sinfulskywalker]

What do you think would be possessive and protective dad Vader’s reaction to Luke dating someone he doesn’t approve of?

Oh anon. Anon, anon, anon. What do I think? Oh I think of this in so many different scenarios that would require a whole ass novel. But, the gist of it is simple: Luke is off limits. Whether Anakin fell to become Darth Vader or did his duty as The Chosen One earlier on and never fell. Welcome to my Ted talk as I will give both sides.

____

TW: Mention of sex, spanking, Dark!Vader, possessiveness.

Anakin Skywalker:

Anakin is a simple man. He likes long walks on the lake with his wife, tinkering in the shop fixing droids, tea with Obi-Wan followed with quiet meditation and watching his lovely children grow up strong and bright and ever so lovely. They look like Padme he will always claim, nevermind Leia has his nose, brow shape and determination and Luke could have been mistaken for his clone as a child, that's all irrelevant. They are growing wonderfully under the Naboo stars. In fact, they're growing up too fast in his opinion. Luke especially.

Anakin was no ignorant fool, he knew his once very shy little boy had blossomed just like his sister, but he was too good for anyone. This wasn't parental coddling, this was fact. Anakin fusses over Luke's attire, ensuring the boy dresses conservatively to not be able to show off anything. Anakin had seen the look in Luke's eyes as he hung around his friends, specifically a boy with bright blue eyes and hair to match (what was his name? Something Area? Ezzere? Error? Oh well Anakin will make him an Error) and how cocky this other boy got daring to touch Luke, be it an arm around the shoulder or "accidentally" slipping and lunging his whole body on top of Luke. Then Padme giggled telling him Luke wanted his as a boyfriend.

Oh no, this won't do.

From now on, he has taken it upon himself that he will supervise the younglings when they wish to meditate in the gardens, or need saber practice or are studying. After all, Anakin was once a Jedi Knight (though now retired) he can hang around and be of some assistance to the younglings. And if a book is thrown at someone's head, specifically Error's head (why learn the boys name if he's to be irrelevant soon?) because he caught them staring at Luke from across the room well that was a test of the reflex.

He gives Obi-Wan headaches.

Darth Vader:

Darth Vader, oddly, is a simple man as well. Though his story is more tragic than what could have been, the only light in his life is his little light: his Luke. That's right. His. Luke is never seen without Vader, at least around Imperials that Vader does not care to learn the names of or are too low ranking to even get close to the Imperial Prince. If Luke is alone, he's locked away in his chambers, but he's not starved, nor left without. He has a comfortable bed for naps, a kitchenette for snacks and servant droids to retrieve him anything he desires.

It's when Luke approaches him with the son of a Moff does his eye twitch under his helmet. Luke is rambling on about alliances, potential financial security and courting. No. No. no. None of this is correct. After Vader excuses the Moff to be for a moment alone with his son, it's Luke locked in his room as his father doles out his punishment. Luke's bare ass is nearly purple when he's done but his son's mistake had to be swiftly. The boy had been told once and Vader assumed once was all that was needed. He'd say it again: Luke wasn't to marry at all, nor being up the topic. His sweet, precious child was to be kept ignorant of the ways of attachment and sexual desires.

As for the Moff. He was dead the second Luke's doors were shut. And slowly too as Vader's thumb and index finger pinched his airway and allowed him a slow death. He did have his hand on Luke's should after all and a smug grin when he saw the two. It was justified.

Luke cries at how unfair it all it. How he's an adult, he can be with whomever he wants. Being an adult had nothing to do with any of this, Vader would tell him. He was Luke's father. He would decide when Luke was ready. And if he has to give Luke a matinance discipline round of spanking each night and have the boy repeat his own words, than so be it.

[fellulahh]

What he’s like on a night out (all characters) CHAOTIC

Lucifer:

- Lucifer always embarrasses himself on a night out without fail. Usually he’s all composed and serious but as soon as he’s has too much to drink he’s incredibly clingy and soppy

- Tells his brothers how much he loves them, gushing over how wonderful they are and how proud he is to be related to them (he’s almost like an embarrassing parent)

- Confides in MC, expressing how he hopes he isn’t too harsh on his brothers

- Ends up confessing how much MC means to him when they’re talking; basically says everything he refuses to admit while sober

Mammon:

- he just follows MC around everywhere for the entire duration of the night

- Introduces everyone to MC and says that they’re his partner which earns him a playful slap

- He’s a bit of a big kid, he’s always tugging on Lucifer’s arm saying ‘hey, hey Lucifer! Watch this!’ And then does something really stupid and pointless

- Once he’s really drunk you could probably find him somewhere chatting up a plant

- Has to be carried home because he’s wasted but that doesn’t stop him from singing a duet with MC on their way back to the house

Levi:

- Oh this demon cuts some shapes on the dance floor!

- He starts off the night really quiet, hiding behind his brothers wishing he’d never gone but after having some shots with MC and Mammon, he becomes completely wild

- Him and MC basically have a dance battle in the middle of the room with Levi winning every time without fail

- The brothers and MC - no matter how drunk they all are - end up just staring at him with open mouths because he has everybody surrounding him while he busts a move

Satan:

- he becomes incredibly smooth while he’s drunk. Usually when he’s sober he can make some comments toward MC that make them blush but as soon as he’s had a drink he doesn’t hold back

- Has a constant smirk on his face, he becomes the biggest flirt. All eyes are on him as he flips his blonde locks

- Waltzers up to MC about 30 times throughout the night, leaning on the bar to tell them how enchanting they look

- There’s no way he’s ending the night without at least a kiss with how much of a smooth criminal he is

Asmo:

- he’s basically every drunk girl in the bathroom at a club - he is the kindest, most sweetest thing you’ll ever meet!

- Anyone that he talks to, he’ll compliment their outfit, saying how flattering it is on them and how much he loves it

- Screams when he hears his favourite song come on, practically deafening the brothers

- Does a lot of drunk dancing and shots with Solomon; they’re effectively partners in crime on a night out

- If MC gets their feelings hurt by one of the brothers or a random demon, Asmo’s the one who will be motivating them, “you don’t need them! You’re fucking beautiful, you could get anyone you want!”

Beel:

- Beel’s that person that randomly disappears throughout the night and you don’t see them for a good hour and then you end up finding them in the smoking shelter with a new group of friends

- Spends the entire night asking ‘are we getting a kebab after this? Is it time for the kebab yet? When are we getting a kebab?’

- Gets excited whenever he bumps into MC and will carry them over his shoulder insisting that they dance together

- He also carries Belphie out of the club when they leave because his twin passed out

Belphie:

- Belphie’s quite naughty on a night out - he won’t get as drunk as everybody else but he’ll still be a bad influence on them

- He’s basically the little devil whispering in everybody’s ear ‘you think you want a jäger bomb? They’ve got an offer on so get 4. You want to try and get a picture of Lucifer cuddling up to Simeon? Do it, he’ll love you for it!’

- Drunk Belphie causes chaos and he loves it

- He’s also the one to take all of the embarrassing videos and photos

- 100% gets kicked out of the club for passing out in one of the booths though

Diavolo:

- he is absolutely WILD, he’s 100% the life of the party doing stupid stuff to entertain everyone; this demon radiates big dick energy and it works because MC is all over him

- Diavolo flexes a lot, he will take every opportunity to try and woo MC, boasting about something random like how many bathrooms he has in his palace

- He’s that demon that smashes beer cans on his head before drinking them

- He always has a crowd following him because he’s the Prince of Devildom!

- Buys drinks for everyone in the club - they adore their future King

Simeon:

- even when drunk, Simeon is still pretty reserved - he’ll stay close with MC and the others and won’t disappear

- He’s the most rational drunk, you wont catch him doing anything ridiculous like some of the others

- However, he will randomly surprise you though. Everyone will be dancing when suddenly a really sexual song will come on

- Sinful Simeon then comes out and starts rolling his hips, doing slut drops and grinding against MC (and Lucifer)

- Nobody knows whether they should be gobsmacked or turned on!

Solomon:

- he spends the entire night trying to chat up the various demons; trying to get an insight into their world

- Tries to flex that he’s a human but that doesn’t really count for much in Devildom

- He also tries to make a deal with the brothers on why they should make a pact with him; although Solomon is completely intoxicated so he probably doesn’t make much sense to them

- Whines to MC, ‘HOW have you got a pact with all of them?!’

- When he’s not busy approaching demons, he’s searching the club for Asmo

Barbatos:

- he has a hard time remembering that he’s got the night off. If somebody mentions that they’re thirsty Barbatos’ natural instinct is to say ‘allow me to get that for you’

- Once he’s had a few to drink, Diavolo has to keep pulling him by the collar because Barbatos keeps trying to sneak behind the bar to help them out with orders

- He’s actually incredibly blunt while intoxicated and can say some absolutely SAVAGE things to the others (i.e ‘Satan please stop whining about Lucifer. We all know it’s because you just want him to acknowledge you as his son.’)

Luke:

- he’s resting in bed staring at his clock on the wall thinking ‘where in heavens are they??’

- Lowkey misses his Papa Simeon

BONUS: What they do when they get home:

Lucifer:

- Hugs the router takes MC by the hand in the hallway and insists they dance with him, he doesn’t want the wonderful evening to end!

Mammon:

- Immediately retreats to his bedroom and sits in one of his many cars going ‘vroooooooom vroom’

Levi:

- Naruto runs through the door, he’s still cutting shapes all the way to his bedroom, whipping out the ‘just dance’ game as soon as he enters

Satan:

- he escorts a very flustered MC to his bedroom where their drunken flirting can continue!

Asmo:

- goes to every single bedroom to wish everybody a goodnight, saying how much he loves them all

Beel:

- after taking Belphie up to bed he raids the kitchen and eats everything in sight, tries to order 6 different takeaways until he realises he’s calling the restaurants with a calculator

Belphie:

- he just gets carried to bed by Beel, Belphie can never remember how he gets home from a night out, let alone how he made it to bed

Diavolo:

- he gets all whiny because he wants to go to the House of Lamentation. Instead he walks through his palace shouting ‘SO MANY BATHROOMS!”

Simeon:

- practically breaks down the door to Luke’s room, “hello!! How’s my precious little cherub doing, did you miss your papa?”

Solomon:

- immediately runs upstairs and puts on the Harry Potter series, trying to convince himself he’s a powerful wizard too

Barbatos:

- tries to help Diavolo to bed but ends up stumbling through the palace and passing out in one of the hallways

MC:

- Satan

——

Phew! That was a big one. What character are you most like on a night out?

[radioactivepeasant]

Fic Prompts: Star Wars Wednesday

Because Disney can pry the Finn Skywalker headcanon from my cold, dead, fingers. And because Disney can’t stop me from reworking their movies if I darn well please.

Most of the fortress had been picked over by scavengers years ago. Any Imperial memorabilia had long since been looted and either auctioned off or confiscated by the First Order. Really, that was the only reason the scout team had considered it as a potential base at all. It had already been gutted, and was pretty well beneath the notice of Kylo Ren unless he was up for sentimental tours.

The general didn’t find that very likely.

Mustafar was far from a hospitable world for most species, but the heat shielding of the fortress was still highly efficient. The scouts had set up a base camp in what looked like it had once been some kind of audience chamber. Nobody had felt like exploring alone. The whole castle just felt...off. 

The young leader of the scouts sat on a pile of rubble, head tilted like he was listening for something. He frowned and glanced down at his team.

“What, Trache?” he asked.

The Twi’lek raised his brows at Finn. “I didn’t say anything.”

Finn seemed confused. “You sure? I could’ve sworn-”

Finn?

Finn looked up again. "Rose, you heard Trache call me just now, right?"

Rose Tico set down a power lamp and plugged it into their Artoo unit, then shook her head. “Sorry Finn,” she said, “All I heard was Artoo.”

Finn.

He whirled, squinting into the darkness of the derelict fortress. “There! You guys heard it that time, right?”

Rose fidgeted awkwardly. "Finn...I didn't hear anything."

Finn.

Finn turned again. He felt as though someone had tied a string around his soul and was pulling. As if under some other power than his own, the boy began to stumble into the shadows.

"W- what are you doing?" Trache hissed.

"Gotta check something out," Finn mumbled. He could just make out what looked like a figure, standing at the end of the corridor. "It's...it's okay. I think it's the Force."

His scout team's protests faded into static behind him. There was nothing but the voice.

Finn. Come to me.

Finn slowly reached down and loosened his blaster in its holster. There was a possibility that he was hearing this voice in his mind. And that had to mean enemies.

"Where are you?" he asked, tensed and ready to fight.

The shadowy figure he had glimpsed before reappeared, further away. It stood, as if waiting. Then it raised one arm, beckoning.

Finn didn't sense anything particularly hostile about the stranger, but he was wary nonetheless. He eased forward, following the dark shape into another chamber. The closer he got, the more he realized that it wasn't made of pure shadow after all. A faint flicker of blue light outlined the person, if a person it was, slowly illuminating more details. A black tabard. A heavy gauntlet. A cape that fell to the floor and seemed to swallow all light that touched it.

The rhythmic hiss that Finn had taken for some kind of machinery in the fortress took on a new volume.

It sounded like breathing.

Finn stopped dead in his tracks. He had seen that shape before. In the First Order barracks, as a little boy, he had seen that shape in the propaganda forced down the children's throats. 

"Aren't you dead?" he blurted out before he could stop himself. 

The giant inclined his head -- or, well, his helmet -- regally and turned. He gestured to one side.

"Walk with me."

The authoritative voice brooked no argument. 

Finn knew he should have been running. That was Darth Kriffing Vader, or his ghost, or a clone, or something. But...he didn't sense the kind of painful storm he'd always experienced around Kylo Ren. There was no hatred, filling the air with danger. Just a strange echo of regret.

With one hand firmly on the butt of his blaster, he gritted his teeth and stepped closer. 

"The Force is with you, young one," the late Sith Lord remarked, "but you are not a Jedi yet."

That rankled a little bit. Finn knew he couldn't do all the things Rey could yet. The General had told him that his connection to the Force was more like hers than Rey's, but he still didn't know what that meant. That didn't mean he wasn't learning. He was just going at his own pace.

"Maybe I'm not," he said, "But I will be."

Will I be?

Darth Vader began to walk. Hands clasped thoughtfully behind his back, steps slow and measured. Relentless. What did he want? And why was he even here?

Reluctantly, Finn followed a half step behind. 

"I'm not hallucinating this, right? Because my team can't see you." Getting lured into the depths of the castle by the ghost of a Sith probably wasn't a good thing. "Why'd you call me?"

"I have been expecting you for some time," Vader said, tipping his helmet down as if observing Finn. "It was inevitable that you would find me here."

His footsteps echoed on the stone, but did not disturb so much as a single mote of dust. The hair on the back of Finn's neck rose when he looked down and saw only one set of footprints behind them.

"You know who I am." It was not a question. 

Swallowing hard, Finn nodded. His mouth was dry, and despite himself, his fingers trembled. Like a death sentence the name fell from his lips.

"Darth Vader."

Abruptly, the man turned on his heel. His cape flared out around him as he raised a finger almost in warning.

"That name no longer has any meaning for me," he said sternly.

"Then..." Finn wrinkled his brow and tried to remember the legend. "You're um, you're a Skywalker-?"

His companion nodded. "I suspected that if I had chosen my true form, you would not have known me."

He raised his helmet as the chamber emptied out into another set of corridors. "Come. There is something I must show you."

Well. This was going to make an interesting story to tell the General later. Finn pulled the collar of his jacket up and shivered.

"Dar- I mean, uh...Master Skywalker? You didn't answer my question before. Aren't you dead?"

Anakin did not slow his steps. "The Force, young one, is a pathway to many abilities that some may consider to be...unnatural."

A wry chuckle wrenched itself from Finn's lips. He shook his head and took a jogging half step to keep up with the ghostly warrior. "You're telling me."

Anakin glanced down at him again. Finn wasn't sure how he knew the ghost's eyes were on him, but somehow he could guess where to look.

"You show remarkably little trepidation in the face of the impossible," he commented.

It was strange, but Finn was almost beginning to feel comfortable with the conversation. He shrugged. "Nobody ever told me how the Force was supposed to work. How am I supposed to know what's possible and what's not?"

He jumped when Anakin tipped back his helmet and laughed. It was a deep, rolling sound, utterly at odds with the mechanical whoosh of his respirator. 

"Indeed! Do not lose your open mind, Finn. It will serve you well."

"Did anybody ever tell you," Finn huffed, "That you make even compliments sound ominous?"

Another low chuckle. "Yes. Your father did."

His father?!

What was the ghost talking about?

Finn scowled at him. "Whoa, hold on. How do you know my father? I don't even know my father!"

Under his breath he added, "I don't even know what I'm doing here."

Abruptly, he began to sense a complicated tangle of emotions from the ghost of Anakin Skywalker. Regret, anger, concern.

"You remember nothing, child?"

Sometimes Finn thought he did remember. But they were just images. Feelings. A woman's voice and strong arms. A man's smile. Sometimes he heard snatches of a song in his dreams, always just out of reach by the time he opened his eyes.

Other times, the dreams were not so kind. Flashes of an old man, reaching for him even as he was shot in the back. His own tiny hands reaching desperately for an old woman screaming a name he couldn't hear. He wondered sometimes if they had been his grandparents. 

The Resistance was his family now. Rey and Chewie were his family. Poe and BB-8 were his family. The General was his family. But in his heart, Finn still wanted closure. To at least know where he had come from. 

"I...remember my grandfather dying." Finn said haltingly. 

"Not your grandfather," Anakin corrected him. "Your mother's cousin. Your grandfather died long before your birth."

He quickened his pace before Finn could insist on an answer. Through stone galleries and ominous archways he continued with a single-minded determination. He did not stop until he had reached what had once been an impressively secure door, long since reduced to ruin by looters. Inside sat a strange dome-like structure that reminded Finn of an egg.

"Did you see that in my head? Is that like a thing you can do?" Finn demanded. He was determined to get the truth. Maybe he could "sense" it somehow. "How did you see it if I can't?"

Anakin did not immediately answer. He waved his hand over the dome, and with a rumbling groan it separated neatly into two halves. It was an old-fashioned hyperbaric chamber. A few lights still flickered dimly inside. Anakin reached down to touch one small screen, and a hologram sprang up. A young man in Rebellion era fatigues smiled up at them from the hologram. Old though it was, the holo was still recognizable. 

"What the- That's Luke Skywalker!" Finn realized.

Anakin nodded. "He was no older than you are now when my spies brought me this image." He seemed almost lost in nostalgia for a moment. "Truly, I would have torn the very fabric of the universe apart to find him."

Finn watched the ghost, noting that he cupped the hologram in his hands as though he held something infinitely precious. 

"You...kept a holo of him in your chamber?" Seemed a little odd for a Sith.

He was pretty sure Ren didn't keep holos of his parents.

"Of course." Anakin did not look away from the tiny, grinning face of Luke. "He is my son."

Finn sat down carefully on the seat within the chamber. His feet didn't even touch the floor. "Hey...Master Skywalker?" he asked, "How did you know my grandfather died before I was born? If it was before I was born, I wouldn't have had any memory of that. Buried or no. Did you...meet him in the afterlife or something? Do all ghosts know each other?"

He sensed hesitation as Anakin answered, "No, I...I was...there."

That could mean a lot of things. "Did you kill him?" Finn guessed, "Like, was he a Rebel? Or a Jedi?"

He heard the creaking of leather as Anakin's hands tightened into fists.

"He was a rogue and peasant Sith. A knave who chased after power at the cost of his kin," Anakin snarled. 

Finn jolted back. A Sith?

A horrible thought slid into the back of his mind. What if his family had given him willingly to the First Order? What if they expected him to follow in his grandfather's footsteps?

"So...what does that make me?" he rasped. 

The tension drained quickly from Anakin's shoulders. He turned away from the hologram of his son and raised a spectral hand to rest against Finn's cheek. It did not pass through him, as he had expected it to. Instead, it lingered, like the brush of a curtain. 

"You are," Anakin said, almost reverently, "A valiant son of a worthy father. And the beloved grandchild of a grandmother who deserved a better life than she was given."

The Force was almost screaming at him that the answers to his questions were at last before him, but Finn was afraid to believe it. Afraid to get his hopes up and be wrong. If, after all this, his growing suspicion was wrong, he wasn't sure he could bear it. 

"Master Skywalker, please," he begged, "I don't know why I'm here, I don't know what you want from me. Just tell me the truth? Did you know my grandfather?"

The other glove rose, and Finn found his face being gently cradled by an ex-Sith Lord.

“No,” Anakin answered, quiet and inevitable. “I am your grandfather.”

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

Must Have Been The Wind | [Fem!Reader x Ben Solo] | Star Wars

Notes: This piece was inspired by Alec Benjamin’s song with the same name. I recommend you listen to it while reading, it’s beautiful :) Also, this is kind of an AU where Ben did turn to the dark side but Luke was able to persuade him to come back, so he never met Rey. In the end he decided to give up his life with the force and moved to Coruscant.

Fandom: Star Wars

Warnings: Abuse, Slight Gore, Violence, Swearing, Angst, Fluff

Summary: Ben Solo decides to complain about the noise upstairs but instead falls in love. But Y/N has a boyfriend and dark secrets.

Word Count: 10′105

© Fanficsforheartandsoul 

--------

Voices woke him up. He sighed. The neighbors upstairs were going crazy. Again. 

He contemplated if he should retaliate since this was now the sixth time they screamed him awake, but he decided not to. At least not at... His eyes traveled to his nightstand. Not at 3 am in the morning. And they seemed to have calmed down. 

He turned on his left side with a relieved sigh, but then they returned to yell at each other. It was incoherent because the walls muted the noises at least a little, although not enough for him not to know when they had a fight.

He would go up tomorrow. He would complain. Tell them to keep it the fuck down. And then they would shut up. Because if they didn't, he could still use the force to threaten them. Although he had decided to never use it again, this was an emergency. His sleep was at stakes. And without sleep, he could turn into a real monster. He would definitely intimidate them for his precious 8 hours.

But when he took the elevator to the 13th floor and knocked on the apartment the next morning, he didn't expect the person who opened the door.

"How can I help you?"

In front of him stood the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She had dazzling e/c eyes with h/c hair, and he felt as if the whole planet paused just to give him more time to savor her beauty. A thousand thoughts rushed through his mind. She tilted her head in confusion, and when she waved her hand in front of his face, he blinked and said breathlessly: 

"H-Hi."

The corner of her lips twitched, and his heart fluttered. There was an awkward silence where he just gazed at her openly while she returned the eye contact. When she lifted an eyebrow - a perfectly shaped eyebrow - he coughed and stammered:

"I uh... I'm living in the apartment below yours and... I wanted to t-to..." 

She saved him from his weak attempt to speak, but he didn't like how she had flinched. She hid it well; nonetheless, he had seen it.

"I'm so so sorry! I know it's been loud at night in the past few days. My boyfriend came over." 

Two years ago, he would have never guessed that his heart would be crushed by one word. Boyfriend. Makes sense. She looked like a goddess and her voice... 

"Well, it happens, I guess." 

Sith, what a great response. NOT. 

"I'm Ben, by the way. Ben Solo."

She smiled and stretched out her hand. He clenched his fist into his side, hoping that any sweat that might have appeared would magically go away, then he shook her hand while she introduced herself.

"My name's Y/N L/N, nice to meet you, Mr. Solo." 

He cringed when she said his last name. She obviously didn't mean it, but Mr. Solo just sounded mocking. How would she even know that he was single? Also, in regard to any friends? They have never met before.

"Please call me Ben, I'm not that old."

The comment caused her smile to widen, and his heart beamed when he saw how her eyes turned into crescents. He almost didn't want to let go of her hand, which was really soft, by the way, but he didn't want her to think he was a creep, so he almost ripped it out of her grasp. 

"Well, Ben," Holy Sith, how she pronounced his name, "let me apologize for the noise with some Jogan fruit cake I just made. Are you free right now?"

He nodded profusely. 

"Yeah, of course, totally. T-That sounds great, I love Jogan fruit."

His awkward way of speaking got a giggle out of her, and when she opened the door wider for him to step into the apartment, he felt like he was the luckiest man alive. When he passed her, he could smell a fragment of her shampoo or perfume, which only quickened his heartbeat. He would probably die of a cardiac arrest. 

"Just walk down the hallway, the kitchen is on the right around the corner." 

He hesitantly followed her instructions while he sensed her presence behind him. It seemed like his sweat pores had decided that it was time for a celebration flush today, and when he reached the kitchen, it felt like he had crawled around on Mustafar. 

Y/N showed him the table where he could sit down while she prepared some cake slices, and he took the seat facing the kitchen counter where he was able to see her. 

He didn't quite know what he was doing here. He had planned to lecture his neighbors, but now that she invited him in and showed that she was a kind and beautiful human being, he had no idea how to approach the whole noise thing again. She did apologize, but he still wanted something more. 

A relationship sputtered his virgin brain, and he had to reprimand himself that he was indecent. He needed a confirmation that they would keep it down starting from today. 

"You only recently moved in, right? I'm sorry I was too busy to come and welcome you."

She set a plate of Jogan fruit cake and a fork in front of him and then sat down, so they faced each other. He dismissed her apology with a wave. 

"It's fine, I didn't expect anyone, and there are so many apartments in this complex so it would be a hassle to say hello to everyone."

She only hummed, but it seemed to him as if she wanted to disagree. But when Y/N didn't say anything, he didn't comment on it either. She started to eat, and he followed. 

"Wow, you're really good at making cakes," he almost let a satisfied moan slip past his lips but was able to catch himself in time. 

"Thank you! I have quite a lot of time to practice my cooking skills, so..."

He smiled at her, and they began to talk about their lives on Coruscant. Ben didn't realize at first, but then he noticed that the young woman seemed to avoid any topic involving her boyfriend. So when he brought the noise up again, she only apologized once more and promised to be quieter from now on. He didn't pry even though he really, really wanted to know what the yelling was all about. 

Two hours went by, and when Y/N glanced at the clock, her expression changed, and she explained to him that she needed to start to work again. He nodded and let himself be escorted back to the door. 

"It was nice meeting you, Y/N. Let's talk someday again."

She returned the smile and pointed to the floor.

"Yeah, I feel the same, and since I live right above you, we can do that any time."

The young woman laughed, and his heart got hit by an arrow again. What was she doing to him, holy Sith?

"I will knock, alright?"

She demonstrated her knocking skills on the wall, and he grinned. It felt like they had become good friends in the few hours they had spent together.

"Let's make that our signal."

He repeated the rhythm she meant, and they just knocked on the door for a few seconds. Ben was the first one to stop their band rehearsal.

"Thank you for the delicious cake."

Her eyes lit up, and he could see the happiness in them. The compliment meant a lot to her.

"Next time you come by, I'll have some of your favorite foods prepared," she joked, and his mind couldn't stop a dirty comment.

"That would be awesome."

With a wave, he walked to the elevator, and Y/N closed the door. While he waited, he couldn't get the comment out of his mind. I would prefer to eat you.

Were his pick up lines really that bad? Cringe.

-

They began talking over their holocoms, and it was so much fun. For Ben, who had lived with strict rules and never proper puberty, it was a welcome change to chat about trivial things like the coffee from one of the cafés in CoCo Town, or what kind of holo transmissions they regularly watched. 

Y/N recommended shows and music for him, and while he listened to her favorite artists, he thought of her beautiful smile and kind eyes. 

He began to understand why she liked the husky voice of the lead singer. And while the band of Twi'lek men continued singing about unknown planets and adventurous journeys to find the love of their lives, he imagined himself as a powerful and elegant Jedi who could save the young woman upstairs from her worries. 

It was childish, but he couldn't stop himself. The songs just stimulated his imagination. And since he had a lot of free time besides his part-time job at the beginning of the week, he let his mind wander. 

But she wasn't the only visitor. He thought about his mother and how her force signature cried out in happiness when Luke had brought him back home. He was often reminded of her tears and how her weakening arms had embraced him with surprising strength. Ben's love for her and his father never stopped, but it had been concealed by all the pain and betrayal he had felt.

He wasn't ready yet to tell this to his uncle, but he was so glad that he had taken Luke's hand and returned. Their relationship was still rocky, but after he had listened to the stories of his mother about her brother, he was able to understand why the Jedi reacted the way he had back then.

But the relationship he had with Luke was better at the moment than the one with his father. Han Solo was surprisingly cold when his only son returned to the light side of the force. It hurt Ben, badly to tell the truth, but he didn't have to courage to say it to him. The smuggler had turned gruff and bitter through the years when he believed that he had lost his son forever. 

It was probably precisely the fact that Ben was his son that both of them couldn't approach one another because they didn't know how to start. Talking about their feelings was never a strength of the men in the Solo family. 

He wanted to share these things about his family with Y/N, but he felt like he would overwhelm her and potentially scare her away if she found out that he was the guy who had tormented the galaxy with the first order. Of course, it was in the past, and he had repented for it, plenty actually, but there was a reason why the noise from the apartment upstairs hadn't been the only thing that kept him awake at night. 

So he kept these things to himself, saying he could talk with his therapist about it while their friendship continued to grow. 

Y/N knocked on the floor every evening before she went asleep. It became a ritual, and he would knock back with the help of the robot arm that he still hadn't re-attached to his service droid. 

From time to time, Ben would ask himself if Y/N's boyfriend minded their interactions. He never met the man, but he knew he would always come over for four days in a row. He knew because these days, the woman upstairs would knock softer. 

The man seemed to naturally be a loud person. Ben could often hear his laughs and shouts through the thin walls when he watched a holo transmission. He not only appeared to be noisy but also short-tempered. 

There were times where he had to listen to their arguments. He never knew what they had been about, but it bothered him greatly. The noise less than the fact that this man screamed at the woman he was supposed to love. 

If I was him, I would never yell at her. 

When his brain first spewed out that thought, he was shocked. What was he thinking? Firstly, he had no right to judge that guy since he didn't know him at all, and secondly, why did that even cross his mind? 

He didn't want to admit it to himself, but maybe he should. Nothing good would come out of it if he didn't.

.

That's why he called his mother 4 months after his first meeting with Y/N. He told himself he was only calling because Ben wanted to thank her for the care package with sweets she sent him, but he couldn't deny that he also wanted to talk about, well, feelings. Unique feelings, to be exact. Love. 

Sith, he couldn't believe he wanted to share his thoughts about Y/N with his mother, but he would rather cut off his own arm than contact his father. They were still ignoring each other, so Han Solo was a no-go. And his uncle Luke also wasn't an option. So he would embarrass himself a little and let his mother swoon about his emotions like that one time where he had confessed that he planned to marry the neighbor's girl when he was 5. 

"Ben, Sweetie? How lovely that you contact me first! How is my son?"

She began to call him that again when he had broken down in her arms a few days after Luke had brought him back to his mother's house. At first, it bothered him a little. He had been a merciless killer, and sweetie wasn't a title a person like him deserved, but he never told her off. To be true, it made his chest warm up, and it reminded him of his childhood.

Leia Organa Solo never lost her loving attitude towards her son, and she didn't even hold herself back when she was in diplomatic meetings, and he suddenly called. She may be a politician, but she wasn't cold towards her family. Thankfully she was at home when he called this time.

She seemed to sit in the living room on one of the sofas with a cup of tea in her hands and her hair was tied in a loose knot. Her posture was relaxed, and Ben could feel her calmness in the force.

"I'm fine, Mom. What about you?" 

Her eyes didn't lose their kind look through the hologram, and she leaned forward, putting the cup on the small table out of view. He noticed a blanket in her lap, and he immediately recognized the ugly carpet, how he called it, that his father bought his mother when he was younger. The green color looked like puke according to his younger self, and he still agreed. 

"I'm enjoying the quietness in the house. Han is buying groceries with Chewie. I don't want to tell you too much, but your father doesn't have the best digestion anymore." 

He furrowed his brows, and when he saw her mischievous expression, he made a face. He didn't want to know that. His display of disgust caused his mother to chuckle. But soon after, she watched him carefully.

"Are you doing alright with your part-time job? You know if you ever need money we-" 

He interrupted her softly but with serious eyes: "It's okay. I make enough to pay my bills." 

He didn't have the heart to tell her that he disliked his unfriendly boss and how he was ordered around like a slave when a new customer arrived with their battered spaceship. But it was true that he received enough money. The work environment may be shitty, but the job in Kai's Repair shop paid him enough. It was alright. He had already complained about it with Y/N. 

"So did you receive my package? It shouldn't take this long, but maybe one of the transports had troubles. It's still not safe on some trade routes." 

Ben shook his head and glanced at his side, where the box with the sweets laid. Most of the candy was already eaten. Since he was living alone, no one could stop his sweet tooth. 

"No, I got it. I wanted to say thanks. They were delicious."

"You already ate all of them?" 

Her raised eyebrow and teasing tone made his ears turn slightly red. If she had seen how he watched one of Y/N's recommended space series two hours ago with a bowl full of candy in his lap and how he absently filled his mouth with a piece every minute, she would have probably scolded him.

"Mom, I'm already 32 years old. I'm not a child anymore, and I can eat what and how much I want."

The defensive answer only proved more that he couldn't control his sweet tooth at all, like so many times in his childhood. His father didn't use to call him a cookie thief for nothing.

"I know, I know. But my adult son still needs his Mom to instruct him on how to wash clothes, or am I wrong?" 

Ben could only roll his eyes. That was one time! Or two... Well, it didn't matter. While he tried to ignore the rising heat in his cheeks, he fiddled with his fingers and tried to get the courage to tell her.

She noticed he wanted to tell her something, and her voice was soft and calm when she asked: "Do you want to ask me something, Sweetie?"

He took a deep breath and then raised his head to look her straight in the eye. 

"I-I think I've fallen in love."

Her eyes widened slightly, and she opened her mouth, surprised. Saying it out loud made him cringe. I feel like I'm going to regret this.

"Ben, that- that is wonderful! Who are they? How did you meet?"

His mother's curiosity and sparkling eyes embarrassed him, but he told her the truth:

"She lives in the apartment above mine. Her name is Y/N, and we uh, met when I wanted to complain about the noise."

Leia furrowed her brows then raised them as if she remembered something. She leaned forward and asked: 

"You mean she's the neighbor who keeps you up at night? The one you complained about last time?"

The way she said keep you up at night made him clench his teeth, and his ears turned even redder. He nodded. He may have talked some shit about Y/N before they met, but that was because they had been very loud.

But not anymore. After he talked with Y/N about it, there hadn't been any problems. Or at least they shifted their arguments to daytime. 

"Really? The one you said and I quote "They are as useless as bantha shit, and the force would do us all a favor if it killed the-"

"Yes, Mom! It's her. And I regret that I talked about her like that no need to say anything else!"

He knew she was just teasing him, but he could feel that he was already red as a tomato from embarrassment, so it was time to stop.

"B-But I..." he tried to find the right words, "I- she... she already has a boyfriend."

He let his head hang low, and his black locks covered his face. His mother wasn't able to see his dark expression, but she could read his body language, and she immediately stopped giggling. Her eyes turned soft, and she sighed.

"Oh, Ben...I'm so sorry."

Why did she apologize? It wasn't her fault. It was no one's fault. Y/N was already taken, and he couldn't do anything about it. He didn't have the right to do anything. All these years, he was never properly confronted by love, but he knew enough about it from things he saw and got told. 

"It... It hurts", he spoke without thinking but was the truth, "my chest. Why does it hurt? I don't know her for that long and- and I never... Why does it hurt like that, Mom?"

Leia watched her 32 years old son turn back into the little boy who was shy and quickly cried, the boy she had hugged so much in his childhood, the boy who had treated the world around him with gentle and soft care, the boy who had gifted her a four-leaf-clover and told her to stop crying after she had had a frustrating talk with some idiotic politicians. She could see the lonely boy in his hunched posture, and she regretted her decision to send him off with Luke to become a Jedi. 

"Love is, how should I say it... it influences our minds and our bodies. It can be amazing but also painful, sometimes both at the same time. The pain you're feeling right now will fade. We cannot choose who we fall in love with. The heart decides, and sometimes it decides wrong. That is not your fault." 

He knew that she didn't really answer his question, but Ben realized that she tried to comfort him. The calmness she radiated through the force engulfed him, and it was as if his Mom really was in his apartment and gave him a hug. He believed he could smell her perfume faintly. His tense shoulders relaxed slightly.

"I feel stupid. I mean, she told me she had a boyfriend when we first met, but I still wanted to continue talking to her. Okay, that might also be because I know literally no one else in the apartment block, but still..."

He ignored that he basically just told his mother that he had no friends, not even acquaintances. Too bad, it was the truth. 

"Well, what do you like about her?"

She crossed her legs and folded her hands to listen to what he wanted to say. He thought about it for a bit. Obviously, the first thing he noticed about Y/N was her stunning appearance. She was attractive, and her stare made his heart flutter. But when they got to know each other better, he found out that she was also kind. Kind and good at making desserts. 

The Jogan fruit cake wasn't the only thing he received from her. Over the last 4 months, she had put some boxes with dessert and sweets in front of his door. Or left a bag with homemade cookies, and all of them had been delicious. A customer once told him that love goes through the stomach. If that was true, Y/N reeled him right in with her skills. 

Then there was the way she talked. She was carefree and outright, but he liked it. She said what she was thinking without taking shit from anyone, and that intrigued him. Also, she had an excellent taste for music and holo transmissions. He had watched one of her recommended series in 2 days and then watched it again and again. 

She was fun and talking with her about the shows or his work, or her friends was enjoyable. Surprisingly, he loved it when she told him stories about her work life and what gossip was going around. 

But Y/N was also understanding and knowledgeable. When he complained about that one guy who couldn't understand that his ship needed a hyperdrive to travel at light speed, she widened his perspective and showed him that not everyone in the galaxy had left their planet before. 

And something crucial, especially for him; the silence between them wasn't weird. Sometimes they would just call and let the holo com on while they continued doing their own things or chores. Once Ben was so tired, he just took a nap while he could hear Y/N humming in the background cooking something. 

Or another time, when her boyfriend didn't come over, they went on the balcony and watched the stars, and she dropped a can of soda with the help of a rope. It was an awesome night, and his heart couldn't stop beating fast that evening. 

It was true that his chest was hurting whenever he thought about Y/N and her boyfriend or when she talked about him, but there were so many moments where he was overjoyed. If he had to feel the pain to receive good memories with her, it was worth it. He could endure it. The pain was nothing to him.

But unfortunately, it wasn't the same for Y/N.

-

"You stupid bitch!"

His palm grazed her cheek again, and the speed of his slap flung her head back. Pain spread across her face, and she clenched her teeth.

"I'm so sorry, B-Babe. I'll fi-fix it immediately."

She wanted to kneel and collect the shards of glass when another sharp pain struck her body. 

Y/N couldn't stop a small cry escaping her lips as Cain stepped on her hand, pressing her palm right into the sharp broken glass. His weight caused the shards to tear her skin, and she could feel how they drew blood. The pain caused tears to prick in her eyes, and she whimpered.

"Fix it? You already fucking broke it! Clean it up and get out of my sight."

He shifted his weight to make himself even heavier, and she sobbed, her other hand grasping his ankle:

"Stop. you're hurting me, please, stop!"

Usually, she wouldn't plead like that, but in the last few days, their arguments turned worse and worse, and Cain's temper was always boiling. She didn't dare to talk back or curse at him because she worried that he would break up with her. And she couldn't let that happen. Too much was at stakes. 

He finally stepped back and turned away to leave. While he went to the living room, he muttered: "Fucking useless piece of shit."

She stayed in the kitchen, kneeling on the floor with her hand a bloody mess. Tears rushed over her cheeks, and she cried silently. It's alright. It's just a phase. It will get better, his job is just annoying him, it will be fine.

That evening she didn't knock on the floor. She didn't want to risk it. Cain didn't know anything about Ben yet, and he definitely wasn't in the mood. Besides, he quickly got jealous; that's why she refrained from telling him about her friendship with her neighbor at the moment.

Instead, she laid on her side of the bed and listened to the steady breathing of the man next to her. She could sense his body heat, but it was as if he wasn't there. She felt cold and lonely. 

What went wrong? 

Their relationship started out great. She had felt like he was her soulmate, the man she wanted to spend her life with. His laugh had filled her chest with warmth, and his kisses made her heart flutter. He took her to the most beautiful places, murmured lovely compliments into her ears, and supported her dream of working inside a bakery. It was perfect.

He was polite and proper, the way he treated her sister was so kind. He disregarded her disability, and Y/N felt like she found an angel. Family was the most important thing for her, and Cain wanted to pay for her sister's surgery. 

His kindness was incredible. Unbelievable, yes.

As it turned out, there was another side of him. A scary one. 

She turned around to face her boyfriend. He looked so peaceful, so different from the angry man he was in the last few weeks. It was the fault of his friends, she knew. He was friends with some shady people, and Y/N had realized there was spice involved, but she ignored it. Closed her eyes. After all, the money he got would help her sister. 

If somebody heard her thoughts, they would probably think that she only stayed with him because of the money, but that wasn't true. She hoped, no, knew that under all that anger and bitterness rested the man she fell in love with.

She lifted her hand and traced the lines of his face. His breath tickled her skin, and she smiled weakly. Tomorrow will bring change. With that thought, she pressed a kiss on his hair and then cuddled closer to him. 

She didn't notice the blinking red light coming from her nightstand where she had put her holo com.

.

When she woke up, his side was empty, and the bedsheets were already cold. Y/N rubbed her eyes and frowned. Where did Cain go? He didn't need to work today. It was Saturday. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and checked the time on her alarm. 08:41. 

That was way too early for him. Usually, he wouldn't wake up before 10, so why...? She heard the slam of a door, and it only took her 5 seconds to jump out of bed and run to the front door of her apartment. He was gone. His shoes, his jacket, even the ugly ass sweater that hung on the coat rack which hadn't been touched for ages, was gone. No, no, no, NO!!

Y/N opened the door and rushed down the corridor of the 13th floor. 

"Cain! Babe, wait! Where are you going?!"

She saw him standing in front of the elevator, and the fact that he carried almost everything that he had stored in her apartment let her blood run cold. His head whipped around, and he watched how his girlfriend rushed towards him. 

"Go back in, Y/N." 

His voice was threatening, and she stopped in her tracks 3 meters away from him. She gulped and searched his face for any clue. What happened?

"W-Where are you go- are you leaving me again?" 

The words that left her lips were nothing but a mere whisper, but he heard them anyway because he responded. And his answer left her devastated.

"Yeah. But this time for real."

The ground shook, and her legs crumbled. If she hadn't grabbed the wall at the last moment, she would have crashed to the floor. Her chest was tight, and it was hard to breathe. He just watched her, his expression icy. It was totally uncharacteristic for him.

"W...Why? Why are you saying this?! What did I do?! Was it because of yesterday? Or the day before? I apo- I already asked for your forgiveness! You said it's fine! Why-" a sob interrupted her, and she gasped, "why are you always leaving without telling me anything?!"

Her voice got shrill towards the end, and she realized in the back of her mind that her neighbors would probably complain, maybe Ben too, but she didn't care. Not after he wanted to pull the same move again. "I can't do it anymore, I'm fucking leaving!" It wasn't the first time where he just threw in the towel of their relationship and left. 

"This- This is not how people solve fights, Babe. We can talk about it, alright? Let's talk it out. Please. Please!"

The elevator door opened with a ding, and Cain gave her a look. He stepped inside without saying a word. When her boyfriend turned to face her, his eyes were the ones of a stranger.

"Don't contact me."

It was as if the door closed in slow motion. Y/N wanted to rush inside, but her feet didn't move. Her body was frozen. She could only watch through her tears as the elevator closed and vanished. Just like her relationship. 

"Fu- Fuck."

Her crying echoed through the corridor of the 13th floor.

-

Ben had just left his apartment for groceries when he received a message on his comlink. He opened it and let it play while he locked his home, and it confused him a little that there was only silence. At first. Suddenly a voice spoke, and he paused in his tracks.

"Ben, Son... Hey."

He almost dropped his bag. Thankfully there was nothing in it yet. 

"My- my..." 

Stars, was that his Dad?! He continued listening attentively, and he could hear some background noise on the recording. He would recognize the humming anywhere. His father was in the Millennium Falcon. 

"It's late here... Listen, I don't really know what I wanted to say- I forgot. Planned this whole thing, but uh... It's gone now. Your father is an old bastard."

Ben slowly walked to the elevator, still listening to every sound coming from his comlink. He absently minded pressed the call button and waited. Han Solo sighed into the recording, and the familiarity from it almost made Ben laugh. 

"Uh, so... I'd like to... to see you again. Maybe you want to join me- and Chewie of course - on a.. a trade deal? We could talk... I would like to know, uhh, how you're doing, and everything."

The message was not a holo, so he couldn't see his father, but Ben just knew that he was squirming in his seat when he had said that. He could practically see it. The awkwardness that the recording transmitted... It made him cringe. But in a good way. If that made sense. 

It just showed that his Dad was just as awkward and shy about their relationship as him. A warm feeling bloomed inside his chest, and he recognized it as hope. Maybe the father-son bond from his childhood could be restored.

His father continued to speak right when the elevator appeared, and he stepped inside. He immediately felt the weird atmosphere inside. A man with curly brown hair and an angry expression on his face stood in the corner. He had a big bag slung over his shoulder, and the force was screaming around him in anger. 

"...and uh... I love you, Ben."

His eyes and the stranger's met. The man raised an eyebrow, and he just gave him a nod. He wanted to press the button for the first floor, but it was already lit. So he turned around and faced the door. 

The recording stopped, and he pressed the button to mute his comlink.

"Was that your boyfriend?"

The fact that the clearly pissed off man wanted to start a fight with him shocked him more than the insinuation and the mocking tone. What's that guy's problem? I just walked in. He rolled his eyes.

He contemplated if he should just ignore the man, but the spikes of anger in the force told him not to. The fact that he remained calm, while the man clearly antagonized him, showed how therapy was helping him. 

"That was my Dad."

The familiar term rolled over his tongue with ease, and it made him smile. He didn't realize until now that his father just ended his message with a demonstration of his feelings. He still loves me. It finally sank in, and boy, did it feel good. He had to lower his head because his eyes got a little wet. 

"Love. What a joke", mumbled the other guy under his breath, and that's when Ben noticed the smell. 

It was faint, but for his sensitive senses strengthened through the force, he could clearly identify it. The warmth in his body disappeared almost immediately.

He turned around and wanted to speak when the elevator bell indicated their arrival on the first floor, and the door opened. The brown-haired man just walked past him and ignored his open mouth. Ben shifted his head and watched how Y/N's boyfriend left the building, his fists were clenched to his side.

"So, that's him." 

The boyfriend. The lover. The screamer. The bedmate. The asshole. The soulmate.

Sith, how his blood boiled. His jaws clenched.

Almost instinctively, he reached out with the force and felt Y/N's presence in the building. The weight of her sadness and shock almost crushed him.

What the hell happened?

After the first meeting with the boyfriend and the realization that Y/N and that guy had a fight again, it was pretty hard for Ben to continue his journey to get groceries.

But he couldn't go to the 13th floor and comfort the person he liked. It would be weird for her. Maybe she would think that he was a stalker. How else would he know about her sadness and the argument? So he gritted his teeth and also exited the apartment block.

Shit, it would've been better for him if he never met the guy. 

He contemplated whether he should contact Y/N later or if he should wait a few days for her to calm down. When it came to the whole relationship topic, he felt like there was a wall between them. She rarely talked about her boyfriend, and he realized that he didn't even know his name.

Maybe he wasn't even that close to the young woman in the apartment above his. His thoughts were grim, and the joy about his father's invitation to hang out and talk got pushed back. His strides were big, and the scowl on his face made the people on the street give way for him. Ben was so buried in his thoughts, that he didn't even realize how he parted the pedestrians like a blade.

-

A week passed, and he almost turned crazy. The fact that Y/N didn't even mention the fight and just went on with a fake smile painted on her lips not only hurt him but also made him angry. 

They had shared many secrets, and Ben really thought that their friendship was deep. But apparently, it wasn't deep enough for situations like this. Or she didn't want to talk about her boyfriend with him, because she fucking knew that he was in love with her he was a man. 

That seemed like a plausible reason; therefore, he tried to ignore the fake happiness and waited desperately for her to spill her thoughts. But she never did, and her sadness only grew.

Their conversations turned superficial, and he had problems to hide his concern. The dread in the force pained him, and it physically challenged him not to storm up the stairs and knock her apartment door down. 

Why aren't you telling me anything? 

The thought spiraled in his mind every evening. He held the robot arm of his cleaner droid in his hands and stared at the ceiling. There were already marks from where he hit the roof with the metal fingers. 

10 days after the fight between her boyfriend and her, Y/N stopped replying to his knocks. 

Ben didn't give up though. He knocked every day. With the force, he was able to sense her in the room above, but she never responded. 

Sadly, he got a lot busier with his work, and the upcoming meeting with his father distracted him enough to forget to knock one day. And when he did. It was a grave mistake.

.

He was on his way back to his apartment after an awesome day with his Dad and Chewie. He whistled in happiness and reminisced about the day he spent in the Millenium Falcon. They went on a trip to Corellia to get supplies and parts for the Falcon. It was a relaxing and calm journey, but Ben couldn't be any happier.

 He was in his favorite place with his father, who still loved him and his best friend since childhood. It was like paradise. At least until he walked through the front door of his apartment complex.

The dread had turned into something Ben could only describe as depression. And it hit him hard. He knew this emotion, and he couldn't believe Y/N was feeling it now. 

So he obviously didn't hesitate to press the elevator button to the 13th floor. When he arrived, the air was heavy. He knew that the young woman wasn't force-sensitive or anything, but the intense emotions of any living being could influence the force. That's why he was so shocked. The disturbance was greater than he would've expected. It made it hard for him to breathe. 

Ben had already knocked on her apartment door, even though he didn't even know what to tell her. He was literally covered in sweat and some oil stains after he had helped his Dad to do some repairs on the Falcon. 

He checked his appearance in the metallic apartment plaque and frantically tried to get rid of the black stain on his cheek. 

Please don't open the door yet, please!

His rubbing only caused the stain to smudge, and now he just looked dirtier.

Great, just great. 

A sigh escaped his lips, and he let his head hang low. What should he even tell her? "I know you had a fight with your boyfriend because I can sense what you feel, and it's breaking my heart." Ha, as if.

He took a deep breath and then lifted his head. 

Only now did he realize that quite some time passed since he had knocked. And still no sign of Y/N. But she was clearly at home. The cocktail of sorrow, regret, and heartbreak was proof enough. 

He knocked again. This time louder and it was accompanied by a few words: "Y/N? Hey, it's me, Ben... Do you... uhh, do you have some time to talk?"

Silence.

Then the light sound of footsteps coming closer.

The clatter of a key and then the click of the door opening. 

Ben straightened his back and watched how Y/N slowly opened the door.

The first thing that immediately caught his eye was the absence of the cheeky glim in her eyes. He only stared at her, and she did the same.

The dark circles under her eyes and the exhausted expression made his heart clench. He could feel how his own face turned into a frown.

"Hey..." she mumbled, not even trying to hide her unhappiness anymore.

"We need to talk. About this." 

He gestured at her, and the corners of her mouth slightly lifted. She opened the door wider, and like the first time they had met, he walked past her, but this time the only thing that he could sense was her mental exhaustion. 

This was only the second time he entered her apartment. But thanks to their holo conversations, he knew how Y/N's flat looked like. She followed him into the living room and pointed to the sofa, an invitation for him to sit down. He did, but he was stiff. 

She leaned on the wall, crossing her arms in front of her chest as if she wanted to create a barrier between them. Ben took a deep breath.

"Listen, I... I know something happened, and I can't bear to see your fake smiles anymore. You know... To see you like this... it hurts me."

His voice was hesitant, and he fiddled with his fingers, something he always did when he was nervous.

The young woman stared at him with wide eyes, then she seemingly slumped.

"So you knew..."

He scoffed.

"How could I not. You're not exactly good at hiding your sadness... kinda like A'tak."

The mention of their favorite character from Smuggle Kings brought a real smile to her lips, and he relaxed slightly. It was a relief that he could still make her smile, even when it was just faint. 

Y/N sighed. It was deep and long, and he could feel the weight of her thoughts in it. She slowly walked over to him and sat down on the sofa. There was still a significant distance between them, but it was smaller than before. She sat on one end of the couch, and he on the other. 

Ben faced her, and she pulled her legs closer to her body, embracing them and hiding her face in between her arms. 

"You know... My boyfriend... Cain and I broke up."

What? He exhaled slowly. WHAT?! 

That wasn't what he had expected. Okay, he knew that her boyfriend - no, ex-boyfriend was leaving that day, but he thought it was only temporary.

"Uhhh... Can I ask why?"

She raised her head and gave him a look through her hair that has fallen into her face. He regretted his question immediately. 

"Forget it... You don't have to talk about it, I'm- I'm sorry... that was, uhm... not appropriate."

He was just so surprised. His head that was already filled with the emotions he could sense from her got filled with some more. Anger, worry, and a small flame of... Hope?

She shook her head and leaned her head back. He noticed how her eyes watered up. 

Oh, wow, man, you're an asshole he told himself and mentally screamed. 

"We- We had problems... For a while now and... well, two weeks ago, he took all his stuff and", she lifted her hands in defeat, and her voice was almost inaudible when she continued, "left. He just left without an expla- explanation."

There was so much bitterness in her voice, the force lashed out, and he had to gulp. Sith, he wanted to kill that asshole Cain. 

Anger welled up in his chest, and he clenched his fists. If he ever saw that man again...

His fury distinguished as fast as it came when tears finally spilled, and Y/N's cheeks got wet.

She huffed and groaned, wiping the falling tears away.

"Ahh, I hate crying... I cried so much in the last few days, I'm really tired of it." 

She laughed, but it sounded as fake as it was, and her breath was shaky. She looked into Ben's eyes, and he could see the pain in hers. 

"I'm sorry... For not telling you. It's not that I don't trust you. It's just... I- I  don't like it when people see me all weak and vulnerable."

Y/N stretched out her hand, and he watched her for a second. Her expression was still pained, but there was a hopeful look inside her eyes, so he grabbed her hand and sat closer to her. The moment their palms touched, she pulled him into a hug. He froze at first, but when her body shook from a sob, he put his own arms around her and sighed into her hair.

“It's okay. I understand..."

They stayed in that position for a while. Ben embraced Y/N while she held onto him and cried. 

Fuck, it hurt him so much to hold her, knowing that she was crying and yearning for an asshole and not him. 

But the fact that she let her guard down and cried around him, also kind of made him proud. It was apparent that she considered him to be trustworthy enough to show him her vulnerability. 

"You know... My Mum told me that love can hurt, but the pain will eventually go away with time. You probably also heard that from your friends, bu- but I really believe it's true."

His cheeks turned red when he remembered the holo conversation with his mother. Then Y/N told him something he wouldn't have expected:

"You're actually the first one who knows that we broke up..."

He blinked.

"Re-Really? Oh, wow... I uhhh... didn't expect that."

Her grip around his torso tightened, and he could feel how she smiled into his shirt. 

"Well, maybe I knew that you're a good comforter?" 

His heart skipped a beat. 

Oh, stars. 

Wait, was she able to hear how his heart was pounding fast right now? Please, no. Nooo-

"Is your heartbeat usually that fast?"

Her tone was slightly teasing, and she finally- sadly? - let go of him and backed away to look into his eyes. Ben averted his gaze, heat crept up his neck, and he was pretty sure that his ears were as red as her cushions on the sofa.

"Uhhh..."

She only laughed and wiped her eyes again, this time with her sleeve.

"I apologize, I might have decorated your shirt with uhh... my snot."

He grinned and dismissively waved his hand.

"It's fine. Not like I'm already covered in oil and dirt."

She studied his face, and her sharp gaze only embarrassed him further. 

"You really have an oil stain in your face," she commented, and he sighed.

"Yeah, uh... I met my Dad today."

Y/N's eyes widened, and she excitedly clapped her hands.

"What? Really?! How was it? Have you made up?"

He nodded. He realized that she seemingly wanted to change the topic, but he kind of didn't want to let her.

"We did, and it was really fun, but I... we..."

Ben really didn't know how to steer the conversation back into the direction of the breakup, but the young woman apparently picked up what he wanted to tell her.

She opened her mouth to speak, and her expression was somber: 

"I never told you, but I actually have a sister. She's six years younger than me and... disabled. Can't see and uhh... I've been working my ass off to pay for a surgery for her eyes. But it's really expensive. I can tell you, Coruscant is for the rich. Not that it isn't obvious or anything..."

He knew she was beginning to ramble, but he let her. He had to process her revelation first.

"But well, my boyfrie- ex-boyfriend... Cain... He wanted to pay for the surgery. He really likes - or at least liked Liah very much, and he had a steady income, so I... I really hoped he - uhh, you know..."

She avoided eye contact and looked down on her hands. 

"would pay for it?" he finished her sentence. 

Y/N nodded. He could sense her shame in the force, and he cringed. He didn't want her to feel like that, he could totally understand her thoughts. If his Mum or Dad... 

"But that's- that's not why I stayed with him while he was so, so angry, I just... Although he hit me and insulted me, I just- I really loved him - still do, and it just, fuck, Ben, it hurts so much."

He exhaled slowly through his nose.

What. What. What? What?

"He hit you...?" 

His tone was indifferent, he didn't even realize that he asked a question, too buried by his racing thoughts.

"Yeah, but- but he's not a bad person, just... He has terrible friends, and his work agitated him, and sometimes when he drank, it... it just happened.  But it wasn't hard, like, just a slap, actually, nothing serious, okay?"

Her voice was shaky and panicked when she tried to defend the man who had abused her.

Ben slowly stood up.

"Wha-What, Ben, hey, are you... where are you going?"

I... Dunno, just... home... I...

He turned and slowly walked to the hallway, Y/N hurried to her feet behind him and followed him bewildered.

"Hey, hey, are you alright?"

She stepped in front of him and put her hands on his shoulders.

"I gotta... That asshole, I have to-"

He couldn't form a normal sentence, he was so out of it. The black-haired man couldn't even feel his anger. There was a void inside his head, and the only thing that he knew at the moment was that he was going to kill someone. 

"Ben, no, hey. You don't have to do anything, alright? It's over. It's over between Cain and me."

"He hurt you."

Y/N paused, a little taken aback that he seemed to care so much about that.

"I know... But he won't anymore."

His eyes, who had rigidly faced forward, now landed on her. 

"Really?"

Her grip around his shoulders tightened, and she smiled weakly. She added:

"Yeah..."

The void cleared a little, and suddenly he could sense an emotion he wouldn't have expected in her force presence. It was relief? What for?

He slumped slightly, and Y/N, all of a sudden, stumbled, losing the strength in her legs. Ben caught her with his hands, and suddenly, she was pressed to the hallway wall. 

Their eyes connected, and both breathed in slowly.

"Sorry, I- I feel a little light-headed..."

He only nodded. His heart was pounding loudly in his ears, and his eyes were forcefully drawn to her lips. 

Fuck, he wanted to kiss her so badly. 

But how could he do that after she had just revealed that she had been abused by her ex-boyfriend? 

She stared at him, and he could see the wheels turning in her head. 

A realization washed over her face, he stepped back and abruptly let go of her as if he had burned his skin. 

She blinked, her hand still raised when he muttered an apology and stormed to the end of the hallway, and left the apartment.

"Sorry, I'm..."

Y/N stayed behind a lost expression on her face. She slid down the wall and sat on the floor. Her hands clasped over her head, and she snorted disbelievingly.

"Is Ben... with me...?"

-

As soon as he had left the apartment, he stopped. Did Y/N realize? Did she find out? 

An icy feeling welled up in his chest, and he heaved. 

"No, please, no."

He gripped his shirt and breathed in torturingly slow. There was so much going on inside his head. 

He hit her. She has a sister. She wanted him to pay for her sister's surgery. Probably stayed with him because of that even though he hit her. They broke up. She's single again. He abused her. I never knew. Never knew.

Ben ran his hands through his hair and grabbed a few strands harshly. The pain cleared his mind a little. 

Mortification hit him like a brick. He had listened to their arguments countless times. How many times had he just listened to Y/N being abused? 

"Oh, Stars, please..."

The sudden waterfall of emotions caused his eyes to prick, and he gasped in shame. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

His breath was shaky when the first tear spilled, and he gritted his teeth. 

What kind of friend was he?

He loved her and gazed at her often. How did he never realize? How did he not see?

"I'm so pathetic..."

He gulped and wiped the tears away.

I have to apologize.

He turned and walked back to Y/N's apartment door.

He didn't even knock this time, just straight up walked in.

"Y/N, I am so sorry for not reali-"

Two lips crashed onto his, and his words got swallowed by them. His eyes widened in shock when Y/N latched her arms around him, and he saw her face from so up close. Her cheeks were wet again, and he could taste salt on her lips.  

His hands grabbed her arms, and he returned the kiss clumsily. The knot of emotions in his chest exploded, and the world around him swiveled. 

Y/N tasted like soda, stardust, and Jogan fruit cake. All the things he had shared with her and loved. 

His heart seemed to have left his body because its pounding was so loud, it sounded like the drum of their favorite Twi'lek band. If this was a dream, he wanted it to never end. 

Until he noticed the echo of sadness in the force. 

Ben placed his hands on both sides of her head and slowly stood back, although he couldn't bear to part with her.

Both of them gasped for air as soon as their lips separated. Y/N slowly opened her eyes, and they were cloudy with emotions.

"What... What was that for?" he breathlessly asked, his tone timid.

She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out, and he bit his lip.

"Listen, Y/N, I- I like you. A lot."

"Yeah, kinda felt that just now..." she stammered, but her expression surprisingly lit up. 

Ben gulped. The thing he would say next would hurt him. But he had to say it. Otherwise, it would just hurt more.

"But I... I don't want to... I don't want to kiss you when I know that I'm not the only one in your heart."

She paused and slowly let go of him. Her gaze avoided his.

"I know I- I didn't kiss you because you're a replacement! I just... the look in your eyes and I..."

She stopped, seemingly knowing how she would only make it worse. She grabbed her own arm, and her fingernails dug into her skin.

He felt shame again. It was Y/N's. 

"I've fallen in love with you," his confession spilled over his lips seamlessly. 

Y/N raised her head abruptly, her expression a mix of surprise and shock.

"And I- this kiss I- I can only hope and pray that it means the same thing for you like it means for me."

"I-," she began, but he pressed a finger to her lips, tilted his head and smiled.

"But I don't want to rush anything. You just broke up with Cain, and I know your feelings aren't sorted out yet. I don't want you to regret anything, and I..." he lowered his head, "I also don't want to get hurt... Or hurt you."

She nodded.

"So... Can we take this slow?" he asked with a small smile. 

Y/N watched how he stretched out his hand and offered it to her. Her fingers intertwined with his. Her eyes turned into small crescents.

"I'd like that..."

.

.

.

3 months later

Loud voices woke him up. He sighed. Then he jumped out of bed.

"Y/N!"

He struck his holo com and deactivated the weather forecast transmission. 

Today is the day! 

Hastily, he grabbed the metal thing on the ground and stretched it up to the ceiling. A loud thudding rhythm echoed in the room. A few seconds later, the same rhythm could be heard from upstairs. Ben grinned from cheek to cheek and walked out of his bedroom. 

The remains of their movie night decorated his living room, and he carefully avoided standing on the popcorn on the floor. He would clean the mess up later. He went to shower and rushed through his washing routine.

The relationship between Y/N and him had changed after their sudden kiss. But it progressed slowly like Ben had asked for. She was truly not over Cain yet and had to figure out her feelings first. The young woman was thankful for the time he gave her. 

Although, he had begun to worry that she found out that her actions that day had been a mistake in the heat of the moment. 

But it apparently wasn't the case, and both of them together mended Y/N's broken heart, and it took her a while to realize that Ben had fixed it. Not through the power of love but through his friendship. He was understanding and patient, and the way he treated her with respect and adoration caused her heart to flutter.

"It happened!"

Was what she told him one day, and while he dumbfoundedly watched her, she just laughed and pecked his cheek. He turned beet-red almost immediately, and he couldn't hide his happiness. 

That day he wanted to hug her so badly, but he restrained himself. He had seen the way she flinched when he suddenly touched her and didn't want to risk it. The abuse she suffered may have caused only a few physical wounds but her mental scars were deep and would hurt for a long time. He would let her approach him first, just to be safe.

And Y/N did.

"Let's go on a date," she had whispered a week ago, and her breath caused shivers to rush over his spine. They decided to go on the weekend and now it had finally arrived.

Ben changed into the white shirt his mother had recommended him - yes, he told her about the stuff that had happened - and checked his looks in the mirror. 

His black hair was still damp from the shower, and he could feel a slight stubble on his chin, but all in all, he was happy with his appearance. The fact that the dark circles under his eyes had long disappeared satisfied him greatly.

He watched the clock on the wall, and his eyes widened in panic. 

"Uh oh."

With an inhumane speed, he rushed out of the bathroom, took his keys and black jacket, grabbed the basket on his kitchen table, and hurried to the front door. It only took him a few seconds to lock his apartment, press the elevator button, and step into it, ready to conquer the heart of the woman he loved. 

When he pressed the button to the 13th floor, he smiled. 

7 months ago, he stood in this elevator, ready to punch whoever decided to yell at each other at 3am in the morning. Now he was going there to take said neighbor on an awesome first date. Oh, how the tables turned.

The elevator pinged, and the door opened. He strutted to Y/N's door and knocked using their significant rhythm. 

A few seconds later, the door opened and in front of him stood the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

"H-Hi."

The corner of her lips twitched, and his heart fluttered.

"Hey, Ben."

[ampmiscfiles]

The Webs We Weave: Chapter 29

Start From The Beginning

Luke groaned as he opened his eyes. Looking around, he found Danny and Jessica laid out on the ground beside him. The room they were in was plain and vacant. It clearly wasn’t meant to house anyone.

“I feel like shit.” Jessica groaned, sitting up and holding her head. “Worse than any hangover I’ve ever had.”

“That’s impressive.” Danny mumbled into the floor.

“Shut up you ass.” she huffed, shoving him.

“As fun as it is to hear you two bicker, we got bigger problems.” Luke grunted, pushing himself up off the floor and walking to the door.

“Seems like a poor attempt to keep us hostage if they put us in here.” Danny frowned.

“All the better for us.” Luke said, pulling back his fist and slamming it into the door and flying back into the wall.

“Holy shit!” Jessica screamed, rushing to Luke’s side had his entire arm looked burnt. “What the hell was that?”

“Not as poor an attempt as I thought.” Danny winced as he looked over Luke’s arm.

“It’s a-”

“High powered electric field.” Norman’s voice cut off Luke’s reply. “It would be very foolish to keep three powerful individuals like you in such a simple room. Don’t worry though, you won’t be here long. I just have some things to take care of first.”

“You better hope your little field holds up Osborn.” Luke growled. “Cause it won’t be pretty if I get my hands on you.”

“You’ll find I’m not very concerned with what actually happens to any of you.“

They could hear the dismissal in his voice.

"I’m more concerned with the idiot ‘billionaire, playboy, philanthropist’ and the special little spider I’ve managed to catch. Enjoy your stay.”

The sound of the speaker crackled out as Jessica erupted into curses.

Danny felt around his ear, taking note for the first time that his communicator was missing. Unless Jessica or Luke had theirs, there was no way to reach Frank.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Felicia wiped her eyes as she continued down the tunnel. They had no idea where Peter and Tony had gone. They had no idea if continuing down the tunnels would even help them at all. No one knew where they all went anyway! What if they never found them? What if Norman already had them? What if whoever Norman was working for had his own plans for Peter? It wouldn’t be the first time someone would think they could experiment on him.

She wiped her eyes again.

She wanted her Peter.

If-no-when they got him back, he was going to be on house arrest until she deemed him safe enough to return to the outside.

It shouldn’t be to hard to keep him indoors. He’d have unpacking to do in his and Wade’s new apartment after all.

She sniffled.

“Hey,” Bucky said, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her into a hug. “We’re going to find him. I won’t just leave one of my idiot brothers behind.”

“One of your brothers?” Felicia asked, her face buried in his chest.

“Yeah.” Bucky chuckled. “Steve is idiot brother number one, Peter is idiot brother number two.”

Felicia giggled as she clutched his shirt tighter, enjoying the warmth of his arms around her.

“Usually Peter would have something snarky to say at this point.” she smiled.

“All the more reason to keep going. We’ve got to find him and take care of this Norman guy. We’ve all got lives to get back to that don’t involve a lunatic with a Halloween fetish.”

“Yeah. I’ve got to tell him how you held my dainty figure in your strong, masculine arms while I cried for him.” she snickered as Bucky choked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wade Wilson knew fury. He knew the dark desire revenge could be. He had given into that desire often enough to consider himself an expert.

Having Peter taken from him brought that dark desire front and center. He itched to pull the triggers of his guns, or swing the sharp blades of his katanas through someone’s flesh.

His thoughts were dark, and bloody. His ideas involved trails of blood and dismembered body parts. No, Peter wouldn’t like it, but he didn’t have to know either. Wade would never enact such things in front of his baby boy.

Still, if Wade was seething, murderous vengeance, he wasn’t sure what to describe the thing next to him as.

At this point, Wade had seen Matthew Murdock in various stages of emotions, but this was an entirely different beast.

For the first time ever, Wade realized the ‘Devil’ in Matt’s vigilante title might mean more than he thought.

A darkness seemed to roll off his shoulders. He was to silent to be natural.

Even the brat had noticed.

While he hadn’t been really interested in talking to either of them after the big reveal of Spider-Man’s identity, the kid was even quieter now.

“So, I can’t believe I’m the one asking this, but what’s our plan?” Wade said, breaking the tense silence.

Matt stopped completely, his face turned straight ahead.

“You two will get Peter and Stark. I will handle whoever’s there.”

“You wait a sec-”

Wade grunted as he was slammed into the wall, Matt’s arm buried in his throat.

“You listen to me Wilson, I won’t repeat myself. You two will get Peter and Stark and get them to safety. We have no idea what kind of shape we’re going to find them in. Considering our situation, I seriously doubt either of them would be any use to us. I need to know Peter is safe. I trust you to follow directions and get him out.

"Bu-” Wade choked as Matt pressed harder.

“My son was taken from me. You may be dating him Wilson, but he was my kid first. I made a promise to his aunt to get him out. I can die, Wade, you can’t. If anyone can make sure Peter gets out, it’s you. That’s always going to be your role. Peter is always going to be your job to protect. If you decide to ignore me and fight whoever we find, you better hope I die there. If I don’t, I’ll make it a personal goal to find a way to make sure you do. I’ll do what I have to, regardless of what it means for me.”

Matt growled as he released Wade and shoved him to the side before turning to Harley.

“The same thing goes for you. Get Stark out.”

“And if they’re fine?” Wade coughed, standing up fully. “You know Pete isn’t just gonna stand aside.”

“Then you better make sure he’s not alone.”

Even after being surrounded by Avengers, looking at Daredevil, Harley felt he could finally see what being a real hero really meant.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony winced as his eyes cracked open to bright lights. His head throbbed and he felt sore. Peeling his eyes open slowly, he took note of his state. He was in a propped up position, but strapped to a metal table. Across from him, in the same situation, was a still unconscious Peter.

“Peter? Peter! Wake up kid!”

“He’s not going to hear you, Stark. I was very careful about how much sedative I gave him over you. I wanted us to have a few moments together.”

Tony growled as Norman stepped up beside him.

“I have to say, while I was hoping to catch two birds with one stone, you weren’t the other bird. Still, I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.”

“Who was crazy enough to let you out?” Tony glared.

“There was a time I would have risen to that bait, but I believe that out of the two of us, I’m not the one who has anything to worry about.” Norman smirked, moving over to Peter.

“He’s something else, isn’t he?” Norman asked, running a finger down Peter’s cheek. “A marvel for sure.”

“Don’t touch him!”

“Has he ever really discussed himself with you?” Norman asked, moving away from Peter, ignoring Tony.

“He’s done research on himself, you know. Extensive research. He’s accessed my servers to an extent Harry doesn’t even know about.”

Tony frowned, wondering where this was going.

“You know, the spider’s venom he received was never meant for human experimentation…..at least not when he was bitten. My people had run multiple tests on them and had been recording the changes in their poison. It was a secret project, so there were no time constraints.

One of the very few projects I gave free reign to.

I needed it to be perfect before anyone could know about it….and they were making progress all the time.” Norman looked over at a large monitor detailing information on the spiders.

“What was the project supposed to be?” Tony asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

“Once properly developed, they would be harvested to create a new breed of super soldiers…ones that would put Steve Rogers to shame. It isn’t a coincidence that Peter’s abilities are greater than Captain America’s. That was always the point.

"You just said it was never meant for human experimentation!”

“I said the spider that bit Peter wasn’t meant for human experimentation. None of the spiders in that batch were even remotely ready to be harvested. Truthfully, the fact he’s even alive is incredible. The venom literally altered his DNA.” Norman paused, looking from the screens to Peter.

“He’s far to precious to be out unsupervised. You had no idea what you had with him.” Norman said, glaring at Tony. “He nearly died the time he saved your ass by protecting your precious Stark property!”

“How about when you attacked him!”

Norman laughed as Tony fumed, guilt over the entire event of Peter’s Homecoming night gnawing at him.

“If you ever thought Peter’s life was really in danger, you’re more of an idiot than I took you for. While I didn’t know who was under the mask, I would never have killed them. They were far more valuable alive than dead. That said, he wasn’t going to come in quietly, and his abilities made close combat difficult to achieve. Naturally, I had to up the ante to acquire him. Admittedly, I underestimated the intelligence under the mask. It wasn’t simply brute force that beat me. Peter’s mind works amazingly fast to try and analyze everything around him.”

Tony didn’t respond, he didn’t need to. He was fully aware of the brilliance of Peter’s brain. While he would never flat out say anything to Harley, if Peter had decided to return to him and SI, he would easily put him as the main inheritor to the company.

Harley was smart and could most likely run the business perfectly but , he could be rash and come off a bit abrasive. Peter on the other hand, was extremely intelligent with a calm and friendly personality. Out of the two, people would most likely be more willing to deal with Peter than Harley…..kind of like how people were more willing to deal with Pepper than him.

Still, none of that mattered if they didn’t get out of here.

“Oh yes, you know all about him though, don’t you?” Norman sneered, sarcasm heavy in his voice.

“You know all about his perfect grades from the moment he entered school till he left. You know all about his life before his uncle passed.”

“I know they haven’t had it easy-“

“All you know about him is what any idiot can look up. You know nothing about what the Parker’s have experienced emotionally. Peter and Harry have been friends since they were very young. I’ve watched Peter grow up. I was around when he lost his parents. I went with my wife and son to the funeral. His parents were brilliant scientists.”

Norman chuckled, looking at Peter.

“He definitely took after them.”

Taking a breath, Norman moved to a small table and picked up a glass cube.

“I had hoped spending time with Peter would have been good for Harry. Maybe get him on the right track. Unfortunately, Harry will never amount to anything.”

“He seems to be running Oscorp just fine .” Tony sneered. “Better than you.”

“I’ll give it to him on one thing.” Norman said, walking up to Tony. “He made a smart move hiring Peter for the pharmaceutical department.”

Tony glared as Norman stopped before him. A sly grin spread across the man’s face as he held up the glass cube.

“Anyway, what do you think?”

Tony looked into the cube, taking in the small spider suspended inside. There was nothing special in the way it looked, but he had a pretty good idea of its importance.

“I’m sure you know why I’m showing you this. It’s the very spider that bit Peter.” he twirled the glass.

“It was found on the floor after the field trip had ended. At the time, we all assumed the spider had just died being outside of it’s controlled environment.”

Norman chuckled at himself.

“I’m honestly ashamed of myself for taking so long to put the pieces together on where Spider-Man might have gotten his abilities. Of course, when I did, I tried to offer him a place as a partner. With his abilities, given by me by the way, we could have made a formidable team.”

“How’d that work out for you?”

“It wasn’t to surprising.” Norman shrugged. “Spider-Man had chosen the path of the hero long before I got to him. It was just disappointing.”

“When did you figure out it was Peter under the mask?”

“Oh, I have you to thank for that.” Norman laughed.

“Think back, Tony Stark . Think back to the early days of a certain webslinger. Think back to a moment in time where you failed him by not trusting him over your own issues.”

Tony frowned, feeling like he should know where Norman was going, but missing something.

“Does the moniker of ‘Vulture’ ring any bells?”

Tony’s eyes widened.

“Oh yes. He was willing to keep Peter’s secret, until he was offered his freedom. It’s amazing what people will do for the chance to get what they want. For Toomes it was his family, for me, well, he’s right across from you.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“And you’re so much better?” Norman asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Have you not been pushing him to rejoin your little hero group? From what I’ve gathered, Spider-Man has never seemed to be interested in joining the Avengers. In fact, I’d say he went out of his way to avoid you.”

Tony’s jaw tightened.

“I guess my return worked more in your favor than you want to admit.” Norman smirked, moving back over to Peter.

“He should be waking up soon, then the real fun will begin.”

“What are you planning?”

“Well, I can’t let him out to wander the streets, now can I? No. So, he’ll have to be kept inside. Luckily, I’ve got some….. volunteers testing out some new features I plan to use in Peter’s room.”

“You’re going to keep him locked up like some prisoner? Yeah, I’m sure that will work out for you.”

“Well, it will only be temporary.” Norman shrugged. “Once he learns his place, he’ll be able to leave his room.”

Tony growled, pulling against his restraints.

“How cute, Stark. Do you really think you’ll be able to break those without your fancy suit?”

“You’re going to regret this Osborn!”

Norman just smirked, looking over at Peter as he started to stir.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank grunted in annoyance as he checked over his gun for, what felt like, the hundredth time.

He was growing restless, not to mention the increasing feeling something was wrong.

“Hell with this.” he said, standing up.

“This stealth shit ain’t working for me.”

Grabbing his bag, Frank left the rooftop and headed off where he had watched the members of the Defenders go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“We gotta get out of here.” Jessica huffed, stalking around their prison cell.

“Well, until we figure out a way around that field, we arn’t going anywhere.” Danny sighed.

“It would be nice to have the nerd with us.” Luke mumbled.

“That little shit is definitely taking me out drinking once this is all over.” Jessica grit her teeth, kicking the wall to relieve frustration.

Danny watched as she stalked off toward the other side of the room, not bothering to look where her foot had made contact with the wall.

He looked however.

His eyes widened at the small dent and hairline crack in the wall.

Maybe they weren’t as trapped as they thought.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Peter groaned as he struggled to regain consciousness. His head hurt slightly, and his eyes felt heavy.

Making to move his hand to rub his eyes, Peter snapped to awareness as he felt the restraints work against him.

“Wha-Tony?” Peter croaked out, throat dry.

“Peter!”

“Isn’t that cute.” Norman sneered. “Tony Stark all concerned for Peter Parker’s well being.”

“I’m not the one that drugged him and strapped him down!”

Peter took the two men arguing as a chance to fully assess his whereabouts and his situation.

He and Tony were both restrained and at the mercy of a psycho.

‘ Great. ’

Peter internally huffed.

He needed to figure out a way out of the restraints, but he could still feel the drugs in his system. He wouldn’t be anywhere near as good in a fight right now as he would be normally.

Still, he had to chance it.

He couldn’t let Tony stay here.

Norman wasn’t after Tony, despite their long time rivalry. That made Tony expendable. Expendable people usually didn’t last in these situations and despite their history, Peter couldn’t let anything happen to the man.

Spider-Man didn’t abandon anyone.

Twisting his wrists, Peter tested the strength of the restraints and various angles and points. Infuriatingly though, they were solid at all points.

“Well now, Peter.” Norman smiled. “Let’s help you get a better look at things.”

Peter watched as Norman moved to the side of the table and pressed a button. The table gave a slight vibration as it tilted forward, putting him into an almost standing position.

“There we go. Now we can all properly see each other.”

Peter held back his glare, refusing to give anything away as to how he was handling things.

“I’m so glad to see you again, Peter.” Norman smiled, an unsettling scenarity in the action. “Our time together was so short last time.”

“You’re the one who left.” Peter replied.

“Well, I had a few things to take care of.” Norman shrugged. “But everything is how it should be now.”

Norman moved directly into Peter’s eyeline, his expression sent Peter’s Spider-Sense screaming.

Norman reached out a hand, grabbing Peter’s chin roughly.

“Now, Peter, how about we finish what we st-”

“Osborn!”

Peter froze.

He knew that voice.

He knew that voice so well.

The missing puzzle piece had finally fallen into place

Norman grinned before dropping his hand and pulling Peter’s mask back over his face.

“Can’t have just anyone knowing your little secret, now can we?” Norman chuckled before  turning to the new arrival.

“I apologize for the lack of a proper delivery but ,” Norman chuckled. “I don’t believe we’ll have to wait much longer. As you can see, we have something he’ll be very anxious to have returned.”

“We better not.” the man threatened, before turning to both Peter and Tony.

Tony looked between the two men. It was obvious they were talking about Peter, but what business did either of them have trying to lure in Deadpool?

That was who they were after, right?

“I must say, Tony Stark was not who I was expecting to see when I came here.” the man chuckled before focusing his full attention on Peter.

“Hello again, Spider-Man.”

Peter looked at the man before him, a sinking feeling in his stomach.

“How’s it going, Fisk?”

[cassianus]

….Let the whole of creation make festival and sing of the most holy birth-giving of the holy Anna. For she bore for the world an inviolable treasury of blessings. Through her the Creator transformed all nature into a better state by means of humanity. For if a human being stands between mind and matter, since he is the bond between all visible and invisible creation, the creative Word of God, having become unified with the nature of humanity, was unified through it with the whole of creation. Let us then celebrate the dissolution of human sterility since our incapacity for blessings has been dissolved.

But why has the Virgin Mother been born from a sterile woman? For that which alone is new under the sun, the culmination of miracles, the way had to be prepared by means of miracles, and what was greater had to advance slowly from what was more humble. And I have another more exalted and divine reason. Nature has been defeated by grace and stands trembling, no longer ready to take the lead. Therefore when the God-bearing Virgin was about to be born from Anna, nature did not dare to anticipate the offshoot of grace; instead it remained without fruit until grace sprouted its fruit. For it was necessary for her to be the first-born, she who would bear the “Firstborn of all creation” in whom “all things subsist” (Col 1.15,17).

O blessed couple, Joachim and Anna, all nature is indebted to you! For through you it has offered a gift to the Creator which is more excellent than all [other] gifts: a holy mother who alone is worthy of the Creator. O most all-blessed loins of Joachim, from which a wholly unblemished seed was sent forth! O renowned womb of Anna, in which slowly, with additions from her, an all-holy infant grew, and once it had taken shape, was born! O belly that contained within itself a living heaven, vaster than the immensity of [all] the heavens!….

Today he, who once in ancient times established the firmament out of water and raised it up to the heights, has prepared heaven on earth out of earthly nature. And truly, this [heaven] is much more divine and miraculous than that [firmament]. For the One who at that time prepared the sun, arose from this [earthly nature] as a Sun of righteousness (Mal 4.2)….

O, by how many marvels and by what alliances has this little daughter become a workshop! Offspring of sterility, virginity that bears a child, a mixture of both divinity and humanity, of suffering and impassibility, of life and death, as if [for him] the inferior had been vanquished by the greater in all things! And all these things, O Master, are for the sake of my salvation! You so loved me that you brought about this [salvation], not by means of angels, nor by any creature, but, just as in the first creation, you worked with your own hand [my] regeneration. And so I dance and boast and rejoice; I return again to the source of the miracles and, filled with the stream of happiness, I again pluck the harp of the Spirit and sing a divine hymn of the nativity….

Let the celebrated tabernacle which Moses constructed in a desert with all manner of very precious materials, and the [tabernacle] of the patriarch Abraham before that, give way to the living and rational tabernacle of God. For she was the receptacle not just of the activity of God, but essentially of the hypostasis of the Son of God. Let a tabernacle that was entirely covered with gold recognize that it cannot compare with her, along with a golden jar which contained manna, a lampstand, a table, and all the other objects from long ago. For they have been honored as her types, as shadows of a true archetype….

O holy couple, Joachim and Anna, accept from me this birthday oration! O daughter of Joachim and Anna and lady, accept an oration from one who is a sinful servant but who is on fire with love and reverence, and who has clung to you alone as hope of joy, supporter of life, mediator towards your Son, and firm pledge of salvation! May you disperse the burden of my sins and the cloud that overshadows my mind and dissolve my material insensibility! And may you put a stop to my temptations, govern my life in holiness, and lead me by the hand to the blessed state above! May you grant peace to the world and perfect joy and eternal salvation to all the orthodox inhabitants of this city through the prayers of your parents and of the whole body of the Church! Let it be, let it be! “Hail, favored one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women and blessed is the fruit of your womb” (Luke 1.28,42), Jesus Christ, the Son of God. To him be glory with the Father and the Holy Spirit to the infinity of the ages of ages. Amen.

St. John of Damascus

[youthful4ever]

10 Financial Principles That Are Biblical

by George Fooshee

Some people mash cans, crunch bottles or shred newspapers and magazines to further the cause of modern ecology. As owner and manager of a collection agency for 17 years, I believe in preserving the nation's natural and human resources too-particularly from a personal finance perspective.

There are ten financial principles found in God's Word to counsel and to help "recycle" many people, especially Christians, who have been all but mashed, crunched or shredded by the miseries of indebtedness and poor money management.

To put it plainly, I've seen firsthand the full spectrum of financial woes that can hopelessly trap people in a society victimized by the credit-card, "buy-now-pay-later" syndrome.

As a bill collector, my business is to try to collect accounts that creditors have been unsuccessful in collecting. Daily, I see people in deep financial trouble. Thousands in this country have got themselves into financial messes that can lead to more serious consequences.

For years all of my personal financial counseling ended in failure. Then I discovered God's mighty Word and His ten financial principles. Financial counseling became a matter of revealing these principles and allowing financially troubled persons to choose whether to obey them or not. These principles reveal God's instructions to His children for conducting their financial affairs.

I believe that one of the major themes of the Bible is obedience to the Lord. These financial principles are real, and obedience to them demonstrates that Christians are trusting God in another area of their lives.

God is Source

The first principle is that God is the source of everything. Philippians 4:19 says, "My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus." Proverbs 8:20,21 adds, "I lead in the way of righteousness, in the midst of the paths of judgment: that I may cause those that love me to inherit substance; and I will fill their treasures."

And 2 Corinthians 9:8 says: "And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work." Whenever we need money or possessions, prayer is the answer. Look to the Lord, because He will provide it-according to His will.

Giving Essential

The second principle is that of giving. Luke 6:38, a key verse, says, "Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give unto your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again." According to Deuteronomy 14:23, one purpose of tithing was to teach the people of Israel to put God first in their lives.

I find there are a couple of ways I can put God first daily. One is to have a quiet time. If I am unwilling to meet the Lord each morning when I get up, that means I'm putting somebody else or something else before the Lord.

For example, how many people have thought seriously about not taking the daily newspaper? The man who is unwilling to cancel a newspaper subscription, which is keeping him from reading the Word of God, may often be the same man who is having trouble making the payments on the TV set that is keeping him from doing the things that would help him grow closer to the Lord. So it can be a vicious cycle. And with TV commercials by the dozens exhorting him to buy, spend, charge and go, is it any wonder that thousands of people are so molded by the world?

Having a quiet time is one way a person can put God first. I believe another is to commit a tenth of his income-right off the top-to the Lord's work. Proverbs 3:9, reads: "Honour the Lord with thy substance, and with the firstfruits of all thine increase: so shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses shall burst with new wine."

Live On Margin

The third principle is that of living on a margin. Everyone ought to live on a margin-a physical margin, a spiritual margin, a time margin and a financial margin. Living on a margin simply means allowing room for things to happen.

There are really only three ways a person can arrive anyplace. He can arrive early, on time or late. I used to aim at arriving right on time, and I consistently arrived five minutes late. That's because I allowed no margin.

Those precious minutes add up. Think of the cumulative effort, on health alone, of continually spending 15 minutes hurrying to be five minutes late. I swim three times a week at the YMCA to stay in shape, and I try to eat right and keep my weight down, since I want to serve the Lord and therefore don't want to die of a heart attack. But 15 minutes of hurrying three times each day for 15 years adds up to nearly six months of 24-hour days when I'm under unnecessary tension, just hurrying to be late. And tension is a leading cause of heart attacks. How ridiculous! But the Lord led me to operate on a time margin-planning to arrive early rather than hurrying to be late.

Bible Backs Saving

The fourth financial principle concerns saving money-setting something aside for a rainy day. Proverbs 21:20 says, "There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up." And Proverbs 22:3emphasizes, "A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished."

For a simple example, if a couple with an income of $12,000 a year would save $1000 of it each of those years and let this money earn 6 percent interest, compounded annually, they would have $24,672.56 at the end of a 15-year period.

If at the end of 15 years of saving faithfully, a son or daughter is ready for college or the family needs to move into a bigger house or wants to serve the Lord on a full-time basis, the couple can start to withdraw their savings. They can withdraw $2000 a year for 10 years and still have $15,322.17, or slightly more than they set aside. Isn't this making your money work for you? God has a reason for the principle of saving money.

Keep Out of Debt

The fifth principle is to keep out of unnecessary debt and thus avoid the debt trap. Borrowing for a house or car is one thing but taking on financial obligations one can't keep-buying beyond the ability to pay-is another. Psalm 37:21 says "the wicked borroweth, and payeth not again." The minute a person goes into debt, he loses a portion of his freedom. As Proverbs 22:7 says, "The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender."

Suppose this same young couple with the $12,000 annual income had decided that instead of saving $1000 a year, they would go into debt for $1000 to buy some furniture. And suppose they continue to increase their indebtedness by $1000 during each of the 15 years, without paying back one cent. With 10 percent interest, compounded annually, on the increase in debt, the couple's debt would have been an astronomical $34,949.74. The debt on $1000 alone for that same period, without any repayment, would have been $4177.21.

Too many people think you can buy now and pay later. That isn't true. I've found that easy credit now makes people uneasy later. Usually a person pays more for the use of borrowed money than he gets in interest for saving it.

Secret of Contentment

The sixth principle is being content with what one has. Hebrews 13:5 puts it succinctly: "Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."

One area where people often first become discontent involves the old automobile. Too many persons trade or sell their cars before they are used up. There's a big difference between fixing up the old junk heap to drive three more years and buying a new car. Many salesmen make the slick remark, "You just make that easy monthly payment." There is seldom anything easy about that monthly payment. It seems to get harder to make all the time. Second Corinthians 6:10 is so beautiful to apply here. It reads: "As sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, and yet possessing all things."

My friends in the automobile business tell me that most cars are good for more miles than most people put on them. Just because a car has over 100,000 miles doesn't mean a person has to get rid of it. Look at some of the buses, trucks and cars still going strong, especially in countries outside North America. They are cars of the same age and mileage that other people junked years ago.

A worthwhile saying to remember on contentment is this: "Use it up, wear it out, make it do, do without."

Keep Records, Budget

The seventh principle is that of keeping records and making a budget. God's Word says, "Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding" (Prov. 23:23). "Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: and by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches" (24:3,4).

If someone were to tell me that he's going to run his business without keeping any records, I would say this is downright stupid. And it is even worse for one who really wants to be a good steward of the Lord's money.

I started my children on a three-category budget when they started school. Every week I distributed the allowance-$1.50-.50 cents each for depositing in separate calling card boxes designated "save," "church," "spend." The kids had a visual control system. If there was no money in there, they had no money to spend. Making a budget won't be that simple, but the idea is the same.

A man I know to whom I have given financial counsel thought he was doing great because he had to borrow only $300 in the last eight months. When I asked him how he managed to get along so well, he admitted he had sold his week of vacation for $500 and had some overtime pay.

I figured that the fellow was actually spending $175 per month more than he was making during the eight-month period, despite the one-time windfall of getting rid of his vacation and working overtime. A year from now, at his present rate of overspending, he would owe $2100 more, with interest adding to his debt totaling more than $30 each month.

By keeping good records, having a plan and being honest with oneself, a person won't get into financial trouble. I seldom see financially successful people who don't keep good records.

It's the same with my own business cars. I cut all my salesmen back 15 percent and made a little budget. The salesmen follow a monthly plan and know what the limit is. They are staying within the budget without a reduction in sales. It's just a matter of being more efficient with what one has.

Don't Cosign

The eighth principle is, don't cosign. God says in Proverbs 27:13 to exercise extreme caution in cosigning. The advice infers that the world's poorest credit risk is the man who agrees to pay a stranger's debt. When a person cosigns a note, he is the one who is really borrowing the money. The reason a person needs a cosigner is because the lender is unwilling to lend that money to the person requesting the loan.

Work Hard

The ninth principle is that of hard work. The Scriptures spell it out: "In all labour there is profit: but the talk of the lips tendeth only to penury [poverty]" (Prov. 14:23). "He that tilleth his land shall have plenty of bread: but he that followeth after vain persons shall have poverty enough" (28:19).

It is important to work. "In the beginning God created" (Gen. 1:1). Even God is at work. This is a principle throughout the Bible. Many times I find that people in financial trouble aren't really working hard. I have often discovered in counseling young men in real financial trouble that they are "tooling" around too much of the time and putting 2000 miles a month on the car. I advise them to take a second job. This increases their income and decreases their expenses and it keeps them from misusing or frittering away their time.

Seek Godly Counsel

The last principle is that of seeking godly counsel. Psalm 1:1 declares, "Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly." A person needing financial advice should not go to someone who makes his living selling the very thing he's contemplating buying. "Without counsel purposes are disappointed: but in the multitude of counsellors they are established" (Prov. 15:22).

Before buying a house, purchasing a car or just borrowing money, pray about it and seek the counsel of godly people. They can keep you from making a lot of mistakes. The reason so many persons don't seek counsel is that they don't want to be told by someone an intended action is unsound-they just like to do what they want anyway.

Above all, don't sign anything until you check the deal thoroughly first. Don't be hurried into any deal. The worst deal in the world is often the one in which a person is rushed into signing-capitulating to a relentless salesman's chance-of-a-lifetime-offer pressure tactics. The best offer in the world can wait.

These are the ten biblical financial principles: God is the source; give first; live on a margin; save money; keep out of debt; be content with what you have; keep records; don't cosign; work hard and seek godly counsel.

As one learns to follow these eternal principles in his personal finances, he will know the joy that comes from trusting and obeying God.

[ryanmeft]

Movie Review: Waves

Waves is one story that contains two stories, and these two stories contain so many more. It is the story of a young man who tries to find his way in the world after some hard personal setbacks. It then becomes the story of how his family copes after his story takes a turn for the worse. Contained within these stories, by implication, are the stories of almost everyone, for at any time in the film you get the sense that all this has happened before, it is all happening elsewhere now, and that if you shifted the camera over a few streets, you might see similar things happening there. Trey Edward Shults has created a sure-to-be-enduring masterpiece of family drama that is laser-focused but also says much about our world and the way we are to one another.

Tyler Williams (Kelvin Harrison Jr.) is a high school senior, and one of those kids who you felt had it all: he’s a wrestling star, in perfect shape, with nothing but potential ahead of him. His gorgeous girlfriend Alexis (Alexa Demie) hangs on his every word. If he blew out his knee tomorrow, his future would still be relatively bright thanks to the small businesses he stands to inherit from his caring stepmother Catherine (Renee Elise Goldsberry) and driven father Ronald (Sterling K. Brown). Harrison harbors a perfect gleam of doubt in his eye, making us low-key aware that Tyler himself might not think everything is absolutely perfect. Indeed, Tyler carries deeply buried resentments toward Catherine for replacing his dead mother, and less-deeply-buried resentments toward his father, who constantly makes it clear that his son is never allowed to rest or relax for even a moment. The perfect boy is a ticking time bomb, and his ideal world subject to fracture from the slightest setback.

That happens when he learns he has a severe injury that will end his sporting career. He does not know how to tell his dad, who is the kind of person for whom getting injured is a matter of willpower rather than, you know, physical reality. Then Alexis becomes pregnant. This is presented as a creeping realization rather than a single dramatic moment. They decide to get an abortion, but Alexis changes her mind, resulting in a massive fight and a breakup. Tyler’s world falls apart, helped along by the same stubbornness his father beats into him daily.

These scenes are shot and paced by Drew Daniels, who also shot Shults’ previous two films, as claustrophobic despite taking place in public. Placing the camera inside cars with the arguing couple, or close by them as they are harassed by racist anti-abortion protesters, he also speeds along with them when they are in a hurry, always keeping close, almost never offering a wide shot. The movie is frequently adorned with bursts of color. Police lights, traffic lights, the colors of an evening sky, are all made to wash over the characters, in some shots almost infusing them as the camera spins slowly, say, on a car trip, or after a moment of great impact. The result is to ramp up the tension to desperate levels, even in scenes where all anyone is doing is talking. The music, too, is essential, with the song “What A Diff’rence a Day Makes” sung by Dinah Washington serving as a motif against a backdrop composed by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross. The pair presents lows when they are needed, and blinding, distracting highs when tension spikes, perfectly following the film’s own hills and valleys with their own musical ones.

We think we’re in for one movie, one story. I personally thought it was going to be something like a Bruce Springsteen song, where the glory days of High School give way to the ignominious existence of simply getting older, having kids, and fighting out a relationship with precious little glory to be had---the existence of ordinary people. Then the film blindsides you. It comes quick, as life often does, so quick we doubt what has happened could really be so. The aftermath also comes to those affected with little warning. Ronald, the father who always exercised total control, finds his world suddenly without it, and like all people who need control and lose it, he spirals into alternating anger and apathy. Catherine retreats inside herself, her marriage over in her mind. Tyler himself does what any 18-year-old would do: though horrified at what his life has become, he tries to escape from it, because this cannot be the end of his story. No one dies, metaphorically or otherwise, at 18, after all.

Perhaps not more affected than her parents, but the one on whom we feel those effects the most, is Tyler’s younger sister Emily (Taylor Russell). She has barely been seen up until now, but we shift focus to her, and see the rest of the story through her eyes. Time passes. Her brother is gone, her parents are around but absent, and she has to live her young life with little support, becoming a quiet and introspective teen. This is interrupted by the arrival of Luke (Lucas Hedges), a former teammate of her brother’s, and the two begin what looks like a life together. The wheel turns; her brother’s life has ended, his future snuffed out, but hers is in front of her. How she chooses to approach it will be a stark contrast with that of Tyler, and these thoughts follow us throughout the rest of the film. I reflected that behind every seemingly bad or broken person is one that was once ordinary, and behind those people are other people, the ones who have built them, in ways intended and unintended.

Indeed, I reflected on much, and my thoughts may be entirely personal to me, because the movie never once tells you what to think about the events in it. Shults has crafted a screenplay free of overt drama, free of speeches directed more toward the audience than the characters, free of proselytizing any sort of message. Witness the scenes in which Emily and Luke comfort the latter’s dying father, who he is estranged from. There is no specific transformation in their relationship, no moment of realization, just the quiet getting over of barriers. There is only one moment of overt confession in the film, between Emily and her father, and when this happens we realize we have never seen them truly interact before.

Little touches like this, playing with our perspective, evoke the sense of passing time and how easy it is to let those around us slip away, or push them away. Other, more traditionally dramatic films I’ve seen recently will slip from my memory, while this one with few bursts of drama and much of ordinary life may stay living in my mind for years to come. Verdict: Must-See

Note: I don’t use stars, but here are my possible verdicts.

Must-See

Highly Recommended

Recommended

Average

Not Recommended

Avoid like the Plague

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[rainymeadows]

I rewatched Eternal Diva and this time I took notes as I went through

Dive under the cut if you dare to experience my mad in-the-moment ramblings (warning for spoilers for pretty much the entire prequel trilogy)

-          Don Paolo’s voice sounds like what Papyrus’s voice probably should

-          Winter Layton is precious in that giant coat

-          Janice is so pretty omg an angel

-          Layton geeking out over the Detrogan is goddamn adorable

-          I love how everything is greyed out in Janice’s flashback

-          Suuuuuuuuper subtle indication that maybe “Janice” seeing how young this little girl was is what prompted her to find a way to put an end to this whole thing

-          Whether it’s a moped or the Laytonmobile, Emmy drives like crazy XD

-          Bitch you ain’t on Top Gear

-          God her big sister relationship with Luke is adorable tho

-          Aaaaaaaaaaaah Layton smiling at their banter dad’s so happy for his son

-          They did such a good job reusing the game’s music for this movie

-          The opera house looks so cool but so precarious – my first thought upon seeing it was “when is this thing going to sink”

-          I MEAN IT’S ON A CLIFF

-          Janice’s voice is so pretty TToTT

-          I like that they kept the Japanese vocals for her singing

-          SONG OF THE SEA-SHADOWING

-          I hate that Layton and Luke were the ONLY people to honestly applaud the performance. Everyone else is a DICK

-          First time I saw this dude, I thought “that’s a puppet, no ordinary person moves like that even in animation”

-          Once again, Layton putting a polite and gentlemanly spin on “fucked if I know, my dude”

-          Lol I love that even the people who didn’t applaud and thus apparently knew what they were in for weren’t down for dying

-          Fuking cowards

-          Layton is always DTF (down to fight)

-          GROSKY OF THE YARD

-          FUCK YES

-          This dude’s manliness is infectious

-          “Gee, I wonder who’s behind this-“ *Descole’s theme starts playing* “-oh well never mind”

-          Honestly who else but Descole would be this fucking extra tho

-          Gotta admit I love the twist of the opera house being a ship, I was totally expecting it to just go plunging into the ocean at a moment’s notice

-          Aaaaah the CG in this movie is really well done

-          Layton’s angry face is kinda ridiculous but I love it

-          I love that it’s pointed out like “where tf did all these sharks come from”

-          I prefer Cartoon Saloon’s Song of the Sea, but this one’s pretty too

-          Lol as if a MAN-EATING SHARK could keep down GROSKY OF THE YARD

-          I’m surprised he can see over the top of his chest hair

-          God, the detrogan is such a cool instrument and I really wish something like it existed irl

-          Ah, it’s only like fifteen sharks, Grosky will be fine

-          I love the air of mystery surrounding Oswald Whistler

-          Layton’s hat is made of 100% pure uncut husband material

-          AAAAAAAAAAAAAH I LOVE HOW PUZZLES ARE USED IN THIS MOVIE IT’S SO GOOOOOOOD

-          I’m so glad they didn’t scrap it entirely coz I mean they’re so integral not only to the Layton games, but Layton himself

-          This music box tune kinda gives me Gravity Falls vibes tbh

-          I think the backing melody sounds pretty identical to the tune’s intro

-          I love that this movie actually lets us see inside Layton’s head and his thought process, it’s so much better than just having him put everything together seemingly offscreen

-          Tbh any puzzle where “the night sky” is the solution is bound to be a good puzzle

-          I just fucking love the implied MASSACRES in this movie

-          God Luke is so goddamn precious

-          Pffft pumpkin dude is so subtly duplicitous

-          Okay I have ot pause for a bit to rant about layton’s design because it’s SO GOOD. Warm colours make him seem welcoming and kinda comfy and the simple facial features, while a bit Ditto-esque, do combine nicely with his overall shape to scream “friend”. Professor Layton is friend shaped. And of course there’s the popped collar to show that he’s cool, the high collared shirt gives a scholarly vibe, his shoes which I stg are plimsolls show a practical side and of course the quintessential top hat shows that he’s a Gentleman first and foremost. Add the amazing voice to that and BOI I DIE

-          Although I can’t help imagining that gif with the teddy bear slapping eyebrows onto its face to look angry whenever he gets mad

-          Luke is not friend shaped. Luke is son shaped.

-          Precious bab shaped

-          Wpw a sea captain I would never have guessed other than the “sailor” accent and the fact that you’re wearing a sailor��s uniform

-          Ugh I love these quiet moments where things can sink in and characters can just talk to each other, I really wish more movieswould do this

-          I love that even if you don’t have a literal look at his thought processes, you can still see Layton THINKINg

-          Agh Amelia is SO CUTe this series is so good at designing beautiful women and cute girls while also making them look DISTINCT

-          I like that they hinted at her intelligence by having her solve the puzzles by herself

-          One advantage a film has over the games is that the visual novel format kinda limits the dialogue, coz it’s hard to convey one charafter talking over another

-          I really like the side characters. They’re simple, yes, but they don’t really need to be complex

-          I will admit that the limits of Layton’s simple facial features means it can be hard to tell who/what he’s looking at sometimes…

-          “that man” asked me to write an opera, huh

-          WHY DOES NOBODY ASK WHO

-          Fuck descole’s theme is SO GOOD

-          WHERE DOES HE GET THE FUNDING FOR ALL OF THIS THOUGH

-          And Grosky boards the ship just in time for it to blow up XD I love this dude

-          I can only imagine his gigantic pecs act as a flotation device

-          Layton preventing Luke from looking at the exploding ship THIS MAN IS SUCH A DAD HE’S SO GOOD

-          I love this scene with Emmy investigating because these parent’s appearances are just enough to make it ambiguous whether they’re Nina or Amelia’s parents

-          Seeing them all wrapped up in blankets is kinda cute tbh

-          LET. THEM. SLEEP.

-          I wonder what Layton uses to keep his hat on?

-          Lol Emmy pushing a fossil aside to look at the map

-          I can only assume, given that they set off from the White Cliffs of Dover, that this island is SOMEWHERE off the coast of mainland Europe in about the same region as Spain

-          Ugh I LOVE Emmy’s uppercrust accent, the fact that she sounds like such a refined lady is such a fun contrast to her literal arse-kicking

-          Also this is totally BBC news lol

-          I love the detail of the historian’s scrapbook being kinda hodgepodge with bits falling out

-          And I love the Ambrosia Seal being super detailed but the subtle incorporation of a sheet music design

-          Gotta admit I totally thought this little banquet was poisoned on my first watch

-          Lol I love that pumpkin guy just KEEPS POURING THE WINE

-          Ugh that beach looks SO PRETTY, I want to go there

-          Janice is totally crushing on Layton, pass it on

-          D’awwwwww luke trying to befriend ‘melina’ is SO CUTE this boy must be protected at all costs

-          Layton how did you hear what she was humming from all the way over there

-          Why do so many anime characters have inexplicable super senses

-          Those wolves’ eyeliner is on point lol

-          “I’m not built for running” lol mood

-          FUCKING HELL DESCOLE WHO IS FUNDING ALL YOUR SHIT

-          HOW MUCH DISPOSABLE INCOME DO YOU FUCKING HAVE

-          Admittedly on my first watch I wasn’t as familiar with descole’s theme, but I saw that castle and I just thought “it’s descole, only he can be that extra”

-          The twist of using the cages for personal protection rather than to trap the walls is simple, but so clever

-          I love that Mr Whistler was one of those accidentally trapped outside. Keeps suspicion off

-          And I love Layton saying “well that solved PART of our problem”

-          YOU SHUT UP LADY THE PROFESSOR IS AMAZING

-          And then he trips and falls lol that’s what you get for wearing old man shoes

-          “Even a good gentleman needs to get some exercise!” pfft

-          Oh hey, they found the starter house that Descole was using while he was building that castle. I wonder what texture pack he’s using?

-          And here Layton puts MacGuyver to shame in the most Ghibli way possible

-          I’d love to see someone try to build this thing XD someone call the Mythbusters

-          Bjut I adore how even LAYTON isn’t sure how this fucking thing works

-          Fucking NERD

-          Yeah, these filmmakers were TOTALLY influenced by Ghibli

-          This is so Castle In The Sky, it hurts

-          “Hang on tight! NOT TO THE PILOT!” – best line in the movie

-          You can’t escape it, Layton. You is a dad

-          DID YOU GUYS NOT SEE LAYTON LAPUTA-ING HIS WAY IN

-          It’s great how all those puzzles seem like they could be ripped straight out of the Layton games, complete with outside-the-box bizarre thinking required to solve em

-          I’m so proud of Luke for solving it!!!!! Such a good boy

-          RUDE

-          Yeah, just stand in the middle of the suspiciously empty room, I’m sure nothing will go wrong

-          That’s what you get for shoving Layton aside, bitches

-          Lol I guess luke could just step through the bars if his head was a bit smaller

-          DESCOLE HOLY FUCK YOU ARE THE KING OF EXTRA

-          “humble scientist” GOOD GRIEF WHAT A LOAD OF SHIT YOU DRAMA QUEEN

-          I love that Emmy can FLY A PLANE

-          Holy shit grosky there are better ways to signal for help

-          And LESS GROSS WAYS TO DRY YOURSELF OFF IN A PLANE

-          Yeah, see, you lost your knickers

-          Ugh, god. I adore this scene with Layton in Melina’s room. It’s so quiet, the soft evening lighting… aaaaaaaaaaah so peaceful, but you can still feel the tension in the air, especially after Melina comes in

-          Oh my god, Layton plays like an angel *swoon*

-          The lack of background music in this scene is what makes it so perfect, the tension is so REAL

-          Lol I love the historian just standing there like ‘welp there they go’

-          NOOOOOOOOO LUKE DON’T CRY

-          BIG SIS IS HERE

-          Oh fuck yes

-          EMMY I LOVE YOU

-          God she and grosky are so fantastic XD

-          WHERE DID YOU LEARN TO FIGHT LIKE THAT EMMY

-          Somehow emmy gives me Michelle of the Resistance vibes

-          God, I kinda love it when you can tell Layton’s already put it all together and is just biding his time

-          AAAAAAAAAAH I love the subtle resemblance between Layton and what you can see of Descole’s face

-          In hindsight, that… stole? Is that what it is? The fur thing isprobably to hide his face shape because it most likely ups his resemblance to Layton

-          But he’s totally wearing black converse like the extra hipster nerd he is

-          God, I can’t even imagine the nightmare of having your memories overridden and personality suppressed

-          Aaaaaaaaaaaand here’s the summation. I love this part in pretty much every Layton thing

-          “Assisting you was the scientist, Jean Descole!” Descole: lol hi

-          LAYTON YOU ARE SUCH A DAD I LOVE YOU

-          Him being gentle with kids is so sweet

-          Also damn this backstory is a lot. I can’t imagine the pain of losing a loved one, but I’m not surprised a father would do anything he could to keep his daughter alive

-          “When did you realise I was involved” “ur an extra bitch who lives for drama, who else could it be”

-          That brief bit of Luke without his hat just makes him look even more BABY BOI MUST PROTECC

-          Okay real talk when did Janice get hold of the key

-          I’m guessing it was in the commotion when Mr Whistler grabbed Luke

-          SUCH A GOOD TWIST I LOVE IT

-          My heeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaart goddammit

-          In hindsight, the hint of Janice wearing Melina’s pendant was really subtle and clever

-          GODDAMMIT DESCOLE CAN YOU STOP BEING EXTRA FOR LIKE TEN SECONDS

-          It’s kinda cool that he’s an archaeologist too though. It really does run in the family.

-          The way Descole and Whistler’s schemes intertwined was really cool

-          Yeah, it just wouldn’t be Descole if there wasn’t some over-the-top machinery

-          YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS MAGIC MUSIC THIS IS MY SHIT

-          When escaping from a crumbling castle, do be sure to grab your boy.

-          AAAAAAAAAGH THE SCENERY IN THIS MOVIE IS SO FUCKING GOOD

-          Good lord, there it is. Descole just can’t function unless he has some ridiculous Humongous Mecha at his command

-          This thing looks especially monstrous and I love it

-          I don’t think I’ve seen ANY faults in this movie’s animation, jesus Christ

-          Descole, did you learn nothing from the attempted excavation of Troy? It’s very possible that your efforts to unearth Ambrosia will be what destroys it!

-          Aaaaaaaagh this flying scene is intense as FUCK

-          Layton and Luke are SUCH A GOOD TEAM

-          WHAT IS THIS MUSIC I LOVE IT

-          Luke you are SUCH A GOOD BOY

-          Sorry but you’ll never be mob tho

-          Mob is perfection

-          JESUS CHRIST DESCOLE ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL A CHILD

-          I was about to ask where that explosion came from but then I realised it was probably a petrol-powered chainsaw

-          Layton who told you that you could look this goddamn epic

-          But I love that he’s taking on the sword-armed Descole with a PIPE

-          That footwork tho

-          Layton must be an amazing dancer

-          So cool that he’s patiently explaining why Descole was wrong

-          Sun, stars and sea. I feel like that’s a Dothraki term of endearment meant for oceanfairing

-          MORE MAGIC MUSIC I AM BLESSED

-          AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH THIS IS THE FUCKING COOLEST

-          I’M SUCH A SLUT FOR MAGIC MUSIC GODDAMMIT AND THIS IS DOUBLE TEAMING ME WITH SINGING AND PIANO

-          I do enjoy that despite its emergence, Ambrosia is still partially submerged. Some movies would’ve had it rise from the sea completely

-          Lol at Descole losing his shit because SOMEONE ELSE found the answer

-          Yeah, bad idea attacking someone right on top of your humongous mecha’s control panel

-          “DESCOLE!” dude he’s fine you really think he’d die

-          I was going to ask why Emmy didn’t use her plane but she probably couldn’t get to it in time

-          Yeah, this is SO Ghibli. The gigantic industrialised machine self-destructing on the ruins of an ancient civilisation lost to nature

-          Noooooooooo don’t do this to me movie, nothing kills me like sad flashbacks

-          Ow my heart

-          This hurts

-          “I’m sorry, Father. I’ve only ever brought you grief and sadness, haven’t I” as someone who’s struggled with depression this is a whole-ass mood

-          NO THIS HURTS STOP IT

-          Also the lil detail of Whistler’s waistcoat being the same shade of purple as Melina/Janice’s dress

-          NOOO DON’T MAKE LUKE SAD

-          “I’m so glad all of you were my very last memory.” Damn that line hits hard

-          GIVE THE GIRL A HUG, LAYTON

-          I said a hug, not a hand on the shoulder, she needs a HUG

-          Seeing the destroyed detrogan really hammers it home, huh

-          It’s very kind of Grosky to let Whistler play one last time in memory of his daughter

-          When I got into the Layton series, I was no expecting to be hit so hard with the FEELS

-          “Do you know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?”

-          GNU Ambrosia, I guess

-          Ugh it’s so PRETTY tho

-          Fucking sparkles and shit

-          D’awwwww, I love the image of Luke patching up the wolves, he’s so sweet

-          Knowing the truth about Emmy and seeing her being so happy with Layton and Luke makes it really painful :’(

-          The world needs more of Layton with a big, happy smile

-          Awww, Author Lady and Pumpkin Dude kept in touch

-          GROSKY GOT HIS UNDIES BACK

-          Ugh seeing Layton and Luke peacefully listening to that music is SO CUTE and SOFT

[coleroz]

The End

This isn’t the one I posted six sentences of last Sunday, that one still needs plenty of work. Instead here is this. I wanted to put a happier spin on the end of The Last Jedi without actually changing any of the events, but I think I just made myself cry.

“See you around, Kid.”

He said it as a last jab at his nephew, as a last tribute to the man who had been his dearest friend.

As a last farewell to everyone, to the galaxy.

We’ve reached the end.

Luke released his hold on the Force projection of himself with a gasp, and tumbled backwards off the rock he’d been seated on.

Breathing heavily with the exertion he had just put himself through, he carefully clambered back onto the rock.

He could feel it. His strength was fading, almost draining out of his old, well worn body. And he knew he was nearing the end.

Well Skywalker, you came here to die. Now you get your wish.

But…..The sunset….

The sunset was so beautiful….Twin suns….just like then….

Just like then.

And he remembered.

He was a naive young farm boy, staring out to the horizon, watching the suns of Tatooine set. Longing is in his heart, longing for something more than this mundane, simple life. It is something he finds himself unable to describe. A feeling he’s meant to be so much more than a moisture farmer his whole life.

Because this planet is too small.

And his heart is too big.

His heart is a galaxy,

and his soul is lined in stars.

All this he felt and more.

On the day before his life would be changed forever.

Thus you might say all this began with a sunset. How fitting that it should end thus. Time has passed. An adventure has come to an end. The hopeful young farmboy is now the tired old Jedi master.

A quest has come to an end,

And home’s around the bend,

And here you are, my friend.

What could be more right?

Let go.

Can he really leave? There is so much to do, so much to atone for. He still has much left to teach, still plenty of spirit, though he’d believed he’d lost it long ago. He still has so much to give the galaxy.

Let go.

But it was alright now. The suns shone on his tired face. And he knew peace.

Let go.

He let go.

And his spirit passed into the Force.

And so it was.

That Luke Skywalker.

The last Jedi.

Died.

~o0o~

“Whatcha workin’ on, Kid?”

Luke looked up to see his best friend in the doorway of his workroom. “Oh, hey Han. You’re just in time, can you help me with this?”

The former smuggler walked closer to where his friend was messing with his prosthetic limb.

“If you could just hold these two wires?”

Han smirked, which only meant mischief.

“So what you’re saying is…”

Luke’s eyebrows shot up. “Don’t!”

“You-”

“Don’t you dare!”

“Need a hand!”

Luke attacked him with one-handed swats, and Han made to grab his arm, laughing.

“What are you two doing hiding in here?”

Both men paused in their minor tussel to watch their sister and wife stride gracefully into the room. She pretended to look disapprovingly at them, but the obvious smile gave her away.

“Hi Sis.”

“Hello Beautiful. And for your information, we are not ‘hiding’, we’re simply having a guy moment.”

“Oh yes? Can your guy moment wait?” She looked intently at her husband. Han we need to set up an extra room in our apartments.”

Han frowned, confused. “Uh, what for?”

“For the newest member of the family of course. The little one.”

Han blinked.

Luke frowned, then his eyes widened as he understood. He looked quickly at Han, who clearly didn’t get it yet.

“Little one? What little one?”

Leia just smiled at him. Then she glanced down.

Suddenly comprehension seeped into Han’s face, and a slow, huge grin spread over it.

“Really?”

Leia nodded, and Han abruptly scooped her up and spun her around, both of them laughing. Secretly, the idea of being a father was a daunting one for him, but he buried it down for now, instead giving in to his elation. Nothing would ruin this moment.

Grinning, Luke joined them. “Congratulations!”

Leia turned and embraced her beloved brother. “Congratulations to you too, Uncle Luke.”

And they stood, reveling in the moment, smiling.

Because despite all they’d lost, they could smile. And these were happy times.

The early parts of their lives had been spent under the thumb of the Empire, and later fighting in a war. Now, though, the Empire was gone. What was destroyed could be rebuilt. They were well on the way to peace. The galaxy overall was becoming a happier place, and the stars themselves seemed to shine all the brighter for it. It was really as though their lives were just beginning.

Leia sighed. “I wish we could stay like this forever.”

“Well, in a way, we will. The memories we make now will last the rest of our lives.” Luke said.

Leia’s eyes shone. “And may nothing ever come between us.”

Luke slipped his arm around his twin, and glanced at Han. “Are you kidding? We’re friends for life!”

Han matched Luke’s grin albeit his was a little cockier, and he reached to put his arm around Leia on her other side while he mussed Luke’s hair with the same hand.

“That’s right! Nothing’ll ever come between us!”

Luke smirked at him. “Right, well, something might if you don’t help me with this.” He held up his non-functioning right hand to illustrate his point.

“You mean give you a hand, right?”

“Shut up.”

The trio laughed.

~o0o~

The first thing he was aware of was that he was underwater.

There was no panic however. No instinctive thrashing about. No burning need for fresh oxygen in his lungs, merely the innocent desire to get to the surface of it. A desire he obeyed. He stroked his arms and kicked his legs, and his limbs seemed to grow stronger as he did so. He could see light above him, and he wanted to reach that light. It looked so warm and bright.

He finally broke the surface, sending a swinging spray of water upwards as he did so.

He did not gasp or pant as one might expect, he merely breathed in, then proceeded to brush the water streaming from his face and hair out of his eyes. The water was neither warm nor cold, and impossibly clear, almost like crystal. Clean and sweet tasting. It rippled gently, though there was no wind, and the late afternoon light reflecting off it making it appear as molten glass.

He only then realized he was standing, waist deep despite it being deep enough to swim mere moments ago. He also noted he was naked, but oddly, felt no shame in it.

He glanced around, and glimpsed a beach not too far from him on his left. He trudged through the water towards it, paying no mind to the small waves breaking upon it. The sand was the whitest and softest he’d ever seen. And he’d seen quite a lot of sand. He stood, dripping, and glanced around him again.

“Hello?” The echo bounced off seemingly nothing. Though now that he looked he could dimly make out the shapes of distant mountains, coated in mist?

He’d also vaguely noted his voice sounded a bit younger than he was accustomed to.

Receiving no reply for now, not that he’d really expected one, he took a moment to study himself. He was….young, he decided. And it might be his imagination, but he very gradually seemed to be getting younger still. His body showed nor felt the slightest sign of age, and another interesting thing, he had not a single scar. He felt his right hand and wrist. His hand was not metal, and there was no distinct bump to mark where his prosthetic began. He touched his chin to find there was no beard there at all. He pulled one of his long locks of hair in front of his eyes to find it golden, with no traces of gray.

This was getting more bizarre by the moment. And he knew bizarre.

“Hello.” He said again, louder than before. “Is anyone here?”

Before he realized, two strong-looking arms appeared in front of him, and draped a simple tan-colored robe over his shoulders.

Mystified, though not alarmed, Luke Skywalker turned.

And all last vestiges of age abandoned Luke in that moment, and he was once more a slight young man, a bright-eyed boy, staring up to into look into the face of his beloved father.

Anakin Skywalker.

~o0o~

He looked not a bit as Luke had seen him last, alive that is. Rather, he looked as he’s seen his ghost beside Obi-wan and Yoda on Endor, except now without the blue aura of a Force ghost. He also was young. A little older than he himself now was, he somehow knew. He sported a full head of dark golden hair, darker and curlier than Luke’s. Like him he had no scars visible on his body. He also wore only a simple robe, in a darker hue than the one he’d placed on Luke.

And, he was smiling, fondly, joyfully, lovingly at his only son. That more than anything made him look younger, and at the same time, so old.

Luke didn’t blink or speak for a long time.

Then he felt the tears gather at the corners of his eyes, and then fall. Precious tears, tears he’d been waiting all his life to cry.

“Father!”

And for the very first time, father and son embraced.

Anakin tenderly stroked a hand through his son’s hair, tears in his own eyes. “Luke. My Luke, you’re here at last! I’ve been waiting so long for you.”

Then he held out his hand to Luke. “Come, it’s time to go.”

Luke moved to take it but paused, and looked back out over the water, back from where he had come.

Anakin studied his son sympathetically. “What is it?” He asked, though he knew quite well.

“It’s just….Leia… Han and I are both gone. She’s all alone….again. And Ben, I failed him, he never would have turned if I hadn’t been so arrogant. And...Rey….She came to me for help, for guidance, but I just kept pushing her away. I left her with nothing.”

He shut his eyes tight. “She’s just like I was. Abandoned, alone in a battle against evil with none to show her the way.”

The tears fell freely from his eyes again. “I failed them all. When they needed me most. Han, Leia and I, we abandoned each other! We- we had an unbreakable bond , but we broke it! We-”

“No, Luke.” Anakin broke in on Luke’s rush of words.

“Your bond is unbreakable. You don’t truly believe it’s broken. Stretched or bended maybe, but broken? Never.”

Anakin placed his large hands on either side of his son’s face.

“Luke, look at me. You know, that I know better than any that you cannot change past mistakes. Regret will earn you nothing. You can only move forward from where you are. I’ve had to accept that myself.”

When Luke still refused to meet his gaze, Anakin continued in a lowered tone.

“Ben made his own choices. He had all he needed, but chose to turn his back on it. Destroy it even.”

“Your sister will carry on, just as she always has, and always will until the end. And she is far from alone.”

“And Rey.” He paused and smiled. “She will find her way.” Then he leaned forward and placing his forehead against Luke’s, whispered. “Just as you did.”

This was what caused Luke to finally look up, his blue eyes meeting his father’s, who smirked.

“She’s a lot like you, y’ know.”

That made Luke slowly smile. She really was, so much like he was. She held the kind of hope he used to.

Anakin put out his hand and tilted Luke’s head up, and Luke met his gaze. Anakin spoke deliberately, his next words interlaced with love and strength. Freeing them from his tongue. As if he’d been waiting an eternity to say them.

“I’m proud of you Luke. Know that. I have always been proud.”

Luke stared at him, his mouth parted slightly. The he pressed his lips together, tears flowing even more freely. He just buried his face in his father’s chest, heaving. And Anakin held him for a long time.

It was alright.

That’s the answer.

No matter what. It will be alright.

Anakin drew back, and held out his hand once more. Luke took it without hesitation this time.

“Now come. Everyone’s waiting.”

The legacy of the Skywalkers was at an end.

But the legacy of the Jedi was not.

I will not be the last Jedi.

Read on Fanfiction.net here.

[tailahjanbash]

Why You Shouldn’t Be A Christian Blogger

I know, It's bizarre. This title is probably the last thing you would expect from me. But lately more and more "faith" inspired posts have been popping up on my timeline. Most of them are from young girls who have just begun their faith walk and have decided to take it upon themselves to teach the masses how to be a Christian. All it takes is a title that's click-bait and one viral post to make a name for yourself, right?

The problem with some of these articles, is that they have little to no scriptural backing or reference, and many are centered around emotions—what makes me happy and what being a Christian means to me. They often contradict scripture. Other times they make excuses for blatant sin—"The bible was written thousands of years ago so it's okay for me to sleep with my boyfriend" for example.

This is not teaching. "But I'm not trying to be a pastor or a bible teacher" you might say. "I'm just sharing my experiences." Great. Share your experiences! But once you cross that line and begin telling your readers who God is, His nature, character, and what it means to be a Christian, you have taken a teaching mantle upon yourself.

And you never place a mantle upon yourself. What is a mantle? In the Old Testament, they were big cloaks that teachers, worship leaders, prophets and priests wore. Mantles are a physical representation of God's covering because they covered the people who wore them. Mantles represent a call and an anointing that has been placed upon you by God that you wear and carry wherever you go.

Christian bloggers do not get the luxury of scheduling posts or waking up one morning and slapping some random inspiring thought together and present it as gospel like any other blogger would.

I never write posts just to write posts. Or because I have to keep my page relevant or need new and consistent content. Even if I have understanding, I will ONLY write a post once I have had revelation and prompting by the Holy Spirit to create and publish it.

I pray over every single word. I read the message over and over, and reference as many scriptures as I possibly can. I submit to the Holy Spirit and ask that he would be the one writing and speaking through me. I send the finished posts to pastors, mentors, and leaders just to make sure that everything is biblically sound. That is the kind of reverence I have for this mantle that God has placed on me.

You cannot force a call. You cannot force revelation. If God has not told you to teach and write about a topic, you will be 1. Acting outside of his will. 2. Will not have the proper or full understanding, revelation, and preparation to handle the massive responsibility and repercussions of teaching.

I did not want to be a teacher. I did not choose to be Christian Blogger. I did not want to be a life-group leader at my university and be responsible for teaching my peers the word of God, because I understood the seriousness of the call. God had to arrest my heart and even send multiple church members with prophetic words to tell me that it was time to step out, teach, and write. My point is this: God will make it clear as day that he has chosen, appointed, and anointed you.

James 3:1 says "Don't be in any rush to become a teacher, my friends. Teaching is highly responsible work. Teachers are held to the strictest standards." In most translations, this verse says, "Those who teach will be judged more strictly."

The word 'Judgement' used in this passage is the Greek word, 'Krima; κρίμα' defined as; A condemnation of wrong, the decision (whether severe or mild) which one passes on the faults of others.

The Greek word for 'strictly' used above is 'Megas; μέγας'. One of its definitions is: Great mass and weight. Another definition is: Intensity; violent, mighty, strong.

One passes on the faults of others. If you are teaching false interpretations, false doctrine, or setting a bad example by not walking out what you teach, God will punish you and hold you accountable not only for your own sins, but the sins of others. He will pass that punishment from them on to you, because you misrepresented Him and caused them to stumble by teaching them incorrectly. The faults and sins that are passed on to the teacher are not small. They are of great mass and weight as we read in the original Greek. These judgements are not easy to bear.

Jesus says that we will have to answer for every worthless and idle word we have ever spoken at judgement. (Matt 12:36)

And a few chapters later, Jesus goes on to say, "If anyone causes one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for him to have a heavy boulder tied around his neck and be hurled into the deepest sea than to face the punishment he deserves! (Matt 18:6)

This…coming from the mouth of Jesus? Absolutely terrifying.

Obviously, God does not take teaching, theology, knowledge, or understanding lightly. At all. He literally says that being tied to a boulder and drowned to death is better than the punishment God has for this serious crime.

Online articles (including mine, people!) cannot feed your spirit. You need the word of God to gain knowledge and understanding so you will be able to catch false teachings swirling around your Facebook and Instagram feeds.

2 Timothy 4:3-4 says, "For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths."

It truly angers me whenever I see viral posts that claim the heart of God but teach the opposite of scripture. I can't imagine how that makes God feel. At the end of the day, its His precious children who are being taught that living in sin is okay, or that that He views his daughters as less valuable than His sons. (Real posts I saw today, guys)

"Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world." 1 John 4:1-6

We have to guard our heart, spirit, soul, and mind. This is why John instructed us to test every spirit—because not every teaching is inspired by the Holy Spirit. And if it is not from the Holy Spirit, then by process of elimination, it is from an unclean spirit. And don't forget, Satan knows scripture and has twisted it from the beginning. From Eve, to Jesus, to us even today.

Always examine doctrine next to scripture. Ask God if it is truth. Ask the Holy Spirit for revelation. He'll give it to you. This is a promise Jesus gives us in Luke 11:11-13—"Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

At the end of the day, recognizing false teaching comes by being filled with the Holy Spirit and knowing the word of God. As long as you are seeking these, you do not have to worry about falling prey to deceitful interpretations, because the Holy Spirit is our interpreter (1 Cor 2:12).

Below are two prayers. One is for those who have found themselves placing a mantle of teaching upon themselves that God has not ordained or placed upon you. The second is a prayer to stand against and cast out any false teachings or ideologies that you have fallen victim to.

Lord, I repent for placing a false mantle upon myself instead of allowing you to call, anoint, and appoint me. In the name of Jesus, I surrender and release my giftings and desire to teach to you. Shape me, my understanding, and knowledge to your perfect wisdom, revelation, and will. Give me a new hunger and desire for you and your word, Holy Spirit. Remove anything in me that is not like you. I bind every spirit of false doctrine or false teaching that would confuse me and whisper untruths into my ears, heart, and mind. We pray and ask all of these things in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen.

Father God, I repent and ask for forgiveness for any sin I have committed, knowingly or unknowingly. I ask that you fill me with your Holy Spirit right now in the name of Jesus. Holy Spirit, I ask that you would be my interpreter, teacher, and friend. That you would strengthen me to withstand attacks from the enemy and give me a greater measure of your holy and perfect discernment in the name of Jesus. I renounce, bind, and rebuke any and all false teachings that have been spoken to me or over me in the name of Jesus. Jesus, shine your light and perfect knowledge over all of these areas and fill them with your Spirit and truth right now. I forgive any false teacher that has deposited untruths into me and ask that you would have mercy on them and bring them to You. In Jesus name, amen

If you would like access to devotionals, teachings, walk-through prayers, or to ask me any questions click here!

[weirdness-on-the-roof]

critical role episode 48 campaign 2 notes and funny lines post break edit:this has detailed notes on all the stuff that happened later in the episode including physical descriptions near the end. enjoy ya nerds

don’t steal the books from a high powered mage; don’t kill the dude; beau turning into cad; look at beau planning for the future

-------

is marisha flirting with matt via matt playing yasha and beau flirting with yasha?

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‘tea the international language’ but no earl grey

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wensworth the goblin

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coming from Cad ‘im a fine tea maker’ is kinda a threat tbh

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elf that isn’t white/European??? yay! also really old elves are cool

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beau and cad tag teaming a political chat with a mage this can’t end poorly

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Nott: :beau ruins every situation shes in and is very abrasive

-------

send the freaking cat!!! why not?? caleb my dude

-------

god i miss allura and gilmore currently

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fucking fuck don’t lie to the mage beau plz stop this is painful ‘you’re not wrong’ sure blame the ancient sea god

-------

‘on the verge of returning’ yea no duh you let him out 2/3 of the way so fjord could get a spell

-------

‘we found a thing’ so smooth and eloquent beau ‘it was presented to us as the happy fun time ball’

-------

‘butter fingers with magical items’

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beau getting a geography lesson from a very old powerful elven mage

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‘magical geometric orb that has the ability to bend time and space and fate’ which is kept in a hot pink magic bag that happened to ‘fall into [their] lap’

-------

‘if youre down im down is what im saying... i have a few slots open in my loyalty bank if you’re willing to pay rent’ says the 20 some human who punches things to the centuries old wizard ‘

-------

liam stress eating

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cad’s hope in the group is heartwarming

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tower metaphors and a conversation!!!

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caleb reading shitty romance novel and nott eating a fish outside a mage’s tower in the morning sunlight in a major city

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caleb takes the rear

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first name drop and a while

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holy shit 200 years of magic using

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cad explaining materialistic nature of the rest of the party to elf dude is hilarious

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teleportation circles?????? in return for access to the sphere!! oh shit thats good

-------

or candy

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crap. no one has insight checked this dude and they gave him the happy fun ball and made a deal kinda.

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‘how do we prove our loyalty?’ ‘by not fucking me over’ sounds like a good plan

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is this guy just caleb’s patron now on the low idk this is how my head works and he said learn

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“you have a geometric shape that makes babies?” “yea they talked about that”

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fjord just kills the dude

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‘i got banishment on hold just in case’ *cackling laughter*

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i agree with elf dude, him not knowing anything about the dodecha is more concerning than him knowing about it

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ALL THE CITIES FROM CR1 MENTIONED FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! I STILL MISS ALLURA AND GILMORE

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good to know the pink bag protects from divination on this plane but just this one

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jester and the traveler figurine

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cad included the Traveler in the ‘chaotic forces’ i still think the traveler is some kinda arch fey evil things idk its real late here and this is incoherent

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‘well, thats been my morning tea‘ 

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caleb getting additional tour

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good aesthetic for the room tbh

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letting weird people in for morning tea is entertainment is a mood and something i strive to be able to do without getting murdered one day

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so yasha and caleb both have gotten the ‘stay with friends’ chat from a powerful being which is nice. but also the ‘use who you need to’ going to caleb is vaguely concerning

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personalized biscuits [bourbon, cinnamon, lobster, fish and three unknowns]

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‘caleb, what happened in there?’

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cad not believing caleb’s bullshit and opening doors for caleb warms my heart

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‘if this isn’t the death of us, and if not hes a good ally. somethings gonna be the death of us so [yolo]’

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‘you can’t bullshit everyone in this world’

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cad talking about beau telling the truth: ‘you’re not very good at it but you tried

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jester looking out for nott and her home town

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caleb and beau being cute while also giving each other shit is the most sibling like thing

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omg going back to allfield that was so long ago for fucks sake BRYCE my person thank god

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jester had a boy band phase its cannon and i think the girls had a sleepover in jester’s old room. also marion never leaves the hotel. THE RUBY NECKLACE MY HEART AND THE HONEY AWWWWW

‘the army of men and women and inbetween that will do as i want them to’ god i adore her being protective of jester

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also the fact matt makes such a good mom why is he like this

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travel time!!!! ‘roll for initiative’-tal

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how does matt keep these notes so organized and remember all the npc names

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the ranger/beast master in Laura is coming out with nugget

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caleb is a devout cat person and jester is the definition of a dog person

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nott refining oil on a magical moving cart, while jester reads a romance novel and trains a dog,

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Dyren- Beau’s roommate at colbot souls; ‘taught beau lots of really cool things’ got sent to a warfront. shaved head, dark clothes, buff b/c ‘been workin out’, ‘do you love her?’ they had ‘good times’, then literal booty call, and dropping locations, Dyren was in Bladegarden. ‘fierce eyebrows, pointed nose’

                    OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES

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Vandren info drop to Fjord ‘he was making amends’

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Dyren responded and was hurt in Bladegarden but is safe. Beau looked immediately worried and happy about jester’s imput [’sounded way into you’]

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empire kids chat and caleb admitting insecurities about powerful people and being scared about the consequences of his actions and the group’s actions. caleb is scared about being forced to leave for safety and being ‘flayed alive’. my thoughts are he would leave if he became a threat to the others by being there or vise versa. trent would extort that b/c hes a dick

“caleb, unfortunately, you don’t get to choose who cares for you” you’re fucking correct Beau

“the problem with friends is that you have to care for them”

walks away “wow cool caleb! see- jester thinks you’re cool because shes your fucking friend!”

me too Tal “everything i like about those two characters in one conversation”

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5 years since Caleb left Trent and crew ie had a nervous breakdown

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gustav left town after being freed and trostenwald now has a WV accent that is too familiar

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100 extra soldiers in allfield. bryce is still up and kicking and wonderful. stuff ‘got this far east [quickly]’. the attacks came from underground apparently so fuck. the fields were burned, building destroyed a bit then they [Xhorhasians] left

“good thing is they’ve already been attacked so lightning doesn’t strike twice” oof thanks bryce

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beau just dead ass asking for illegal writing statements

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fjord having a thank u jesus bryce moment

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jester giving cad a pretty present is ‘so exciting’ and precious

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Cad not knowing cookbooks were a thing!!! and not being utterly literate enough to understand it

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wtf happened to liam’s voice in the ‘main export is oysters’ thing

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FELDERWEN!!!!!

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a dozen squads of 50 ppl each patrolling felderwen area so rippppp

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Nott knows where the halfing’s house is.... interesting... and is heavily drinking

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BLUE FLASH

elven woman in fine clothes of green and black ----lady vest durogna the arch mage of antiquity serboros assembly

a male figure in deep blue robes, older pale elf, fine clothes, the flash came from him----- martinette luden’th de____ arch mage of domestic protection

CALEB KNOWS THEM BOTH FROM THE ACADEMY AHHHHHH

he just lays flat and hides in the cart internally: ‘nopenopenopenope’

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several burned buildings, a warehouse, an inn, apothecary and several houses

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ohhhh shit the halfling was the owner of the apothecary and nott was looking for the shit she had been sending back this whole adventure....... im sad now that was confirmed

havent found a body of yeza

luke is yeza’s son at old edith’s house

            halflings only produce halflings according to something i read at some point but forget where sooooooooo

shattered vials and materials and house stuff

CHILDREN'S TOYS

locked basement which nott knows of?? Nott is anxious and impatient when the door doesn’t open. jester fails, yasha rages and at a 19 and doesn’t break the door. ‘it wasn’t [trapped]’ but dispel magic worked to open it.

a 15′x15′ room, tossed ‘not like you remember’ to nott, a 2x3 iron chest. a single chair in the center of the room. definitely a struggle with heavy impacts and blade scratched on wall

             nott was the torturer from the goblin tribe

chair was placed in the spot after the struggle

this was where he [yeza] kept chemicals according to nott

poisoned iron locked box (dull black glass)  inside a retractable silver tripod to hold something atop it, 3 empty vials 1 full one with a liquid/gas fog like dull colored thing, a pile of destroyed notes [two pieces of still legible paper which have props]

            dunamous field, causes ppl slow to be slower or faster, ‘captured crin operatives’ dunaments and dunamacy, origon gliffs, exist outside established schools of magic, theory in deeply rooted in arcana taken for granted, rooted in _____ town, 12-16 months to refine, word has found me that trent’s kiddos have knacks for this things, dreams are thrilling

well shittttt

            crin on battle fields, ‘breaking fields of fate, fuck the raven queen

SHIIIIIT

a piece of dunemous

dodecha goes in tripod according to beau

chair facing chest

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cricks did this apparently

a little under 100 crowns guard killed, 4 civilians burned

soldiers just ‘slowed down’ 

left via tunnels and collapsed them behind them

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nott dont be a bitch and don’t get mad at caleb and call them ‘his people’

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cad picks up caleb and ‘youre not at fault here, youre the solution here. don’t let her anger... its not about you’

my HEART

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the chest is too big for the haver sack but fits in lorenzo’s bag of holding

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people have entered and exited since the attack and left the chair and stuff

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lots ‘o chairs

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nott needs to see ledith and uke (?) and not flip the fuck out

‘humble hobble’

nott looked like halfling plump face, braids, tan skin

edith- human older, grey hair, beady eyes, ever present smile like face

          LUKE IS HER SON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CANNON

         *edit- rewatching this and seeing ever one’s faces “wheres my son?!” particularly laura/liam/travis just hurt. liam just looked up after a second and travis did his face he does and laura just stiffened and eyes and hand to face. caleb/liam who knows just hugs himself the rest of the convo. marisha is note taking and fuck the video off now

about 5 yrs old, blue eyes, tan/light brown skin, halfling

gave him the doll of the king

IM GONNA CRY NOW BYE

‘HES PROABLY DEAD NOW TOO LIKE I THOUGHT YOU WER’

yenza locks him away when ‘the mean lady comes by’

mean lady has pointy ears and comes often, luke was kept in room, luke was pushed out of the house and told to go somewhere safe so he ran to edith’s house and ‘everything was on fire’

‘im not strong enough to come back yet but know that [im stll thinking of you and i send things] and i hope dad sends them to you.“ fuck my heart

“in my heart i think he is” “well don’t die”

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the elves are gong to the ruins of yenza’s house

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marisha looked so betrayed

tal ‘i was waiting for the riegel shoe to drop’

WOW

HEY CALEB- WOOOW

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we’ll pick up hiiiere

fuck you sam and matt and everything abou this my heart is just FUCKKK

ummm so enjoy the frantic poorly taken notes <3