hi guys! it's me again on my way to throw some salt because i'm starting to believe guren belongs in a retirement home to be treated for early onset dementia.
so i'm reading the chapter, and it's all fine and good, i love it, go krul, go ferid, whatever. and then even guren shows up! i was waiting for that. but then i see this
and it's like, uh, yeah, weird thing to say considering she literally is the person that caused "everyone" to die for her own goals, but this isn't a new thing. he's said some shit like "if i had just let myself die along shinya, mahiru and the others" before, and it was odd then, it's odd now. anyway, then comes this
and i'm like?? hello???? this is a hundred times worse than "dying together with everyone", because it takes his friends out of the equation entirely and gives the image of someone who doesn't even care if they left them behind, who just wants to go and die together with their murderer. which does not fit the image i have of guren at all.
you may know that this notion itself is also not new, since he did try to die with mahiru by throwing himself and her out of a window in catastrophe (hence the "back then"). the thing is, she had not killed his friends at that point. to him she was just a broken girl and if he could end her suffering by dying alongside her, his saviour complex ass would have done it. he also hadn't yet come to the realisation of how much he loved and needed his friends. but to say this now??? i feel personally offended on behalf of guren squad, lol. imagine if he fucking died and left them to spend their last 2 years alive wondering about all the lies and the hurt, having no way of knowing their end is near, probably blaming themselves for not being able to help him even though he brought it upon himself willingly. it just makes me want to. urgh. it's horrible, and it makes no sense.
and yeah, i'm not going to pretend that i'm not also offended because of this.
did this just mean nothing?? this shit was so emotional, the original scene, the fact that he still remembers exactly what shinya told him eight years ago, for THIS? for him to say the same exact thing TO THE PERSON WHO KILLED HIM? sach mal hast du lack gesoffen oder was??
the dissonance between him shedding all those tears over his friends' deaths and then acting this way towards mahiru, i just. i do not get it.
and like, i hear the people saying that he's just pretending, he's only staying so calm because he has his own plan, he's going to betray mahiru, and i want to believe that, i really do. it' the only thing that would make sense. but as awesome and fitting of a plot twist as that would be, i will not set myself up for further disappointment and believe it.
maybe we're just doomed to watch guren and mahiru get married and have 5 kids that they name in honour of his dead friends, who knows.
salt over
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modern wolfstar but sirius is a scam tarot reader at small town fairs (he got the cards from a thrift store for a few pounds, watched one video on how to read them and he decided it's his best shot at making some money to survive). cue the fair where he's working ends up in a small town from wales where, lo and behold, he keeps pulling the moon and the death card for everyone. a small child that can't be older than 5? they get the death card. an old lady who wanted to know how her tomatoes will do this summer? death.
now, sirius does know that the death card means new beginnings and it's not as bad as it seems but everyone just starts calling him names and his clientele lessens by the day because everyone finds out about his cards and how he's the bringer of death (literally no one died since he got there so he finds the new nickname a bit overkill).
he's too worried about his scamming abilities though. he just can't shake the weird feeling he gets when he pulls moon out again, even after he takes the damn card out of his pack because he's sick of seeing it (he leaves the death card in because he does find it funny)
but then, on the night before the full moon, when he's just getting ready to pack his cards and cheap props and call it a day, a farmer comes to get a reading. he's still in his overalls because he came straight from the farm here to check out the card reader who the villagers keep saying is predicting deaths on the full moon to see what the fuss is about.
sirius is smitten as soon as the farmer opens his mouth, but imagine his surprise when he hears that he's been slowly making people fear him again, after he just convinced them that he's a kind guy. and imagine his bigger surprise when the cute farmer with hay stuck in his hair and mud on his overalls tells him he's a werewolf.
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