#medicate me

[fuzzyghost]

[trashmagic-333]

i am one minor inconvenience away from suicide🧘‍♀️🧘‍♀️

[hanmaitani]

plopping this over here @oooohno but -

PLS PLS PLS NANA LISTEN

his mouth forms a little o when he's watching you suck on it, moans a little when your teeth scrape against the sensitive skin. its so hot to him bc you're not even consciously trying to cause him issues. you're fucked out from just his fingers and he meant to let you ease up, to just let you clean off his fingers and then he'd clean you up.... but his vision is blurry now, the only thing clear is the sight of your tongue peeking out from between your lips to snake down past his knuckles. the way your lips glisten when you pull off his fingers with a wet pop. the way you trail your tongue down the trail of blood to where your nails pierced his wrist, pressing wet kisses to the marks.

its really not his fault that he's painfully hard then. that he has to sink his cock into you and destroy you even more.... its not his fault at all, his head is just swimming with need for you.

[opaleyedprince]

every time my job orders a drug test i wish so badly i were medicated

[chunkypossum]

[powpowhammer]

faded blue house portrait hanging on the wall at the local urgentcare

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

[parisoonic]

People in glass houses Heavy...

[avarkriss]

listen. listen to me so carefully right now. (if you're in the eclipse path/planning on viewing). please don't stare directly at the sun tomorrow. i am begging you - do not stare at it. if you got eclipse glasses off of amazon/other, please put them on in your house and make sure you can't see anything; if you can still see like regular sun glasses, they are not safe for eclipse viewing, you will burn your retinas, and we cannot fix that. eclipse glasses should be iso/ce certified, and aas (american astronomical society) approved. please make smart choices and protect your eyes. please.

[dokani]

decided i’m gonna get this printed as a poster and just hang it above my bed so each morning i can wake up feeling like a victim of medical malpractice

[got-the-cool-shoeshine]

im not good at tf2

[go-star-sailor]

homoerotic wellness checkup

[irradiatedsnakes]

i didnt mean for this to blow up and of course there’s some dumbass comments on it which is annoying as hell. which is why im appending it with my mob psycho furry and pokemon art thank you

also transmeds go fuck yourselves

[faeriekit]

"Okay." Danny slowly laid the already cold body back onto the table, ready to slide back it into the refuge of cold storage. "Okay. Dead guy. Stay there."

The body didn't move.

"Fantastic. Now. Hang out while I pour the embalming fluid into the pump, alright? It should only be a minute."

And it usually did; working in a funeral home wasn't extremely glamorous, but it paid the bills, and Danny had already been used to the rhyme and rhythm of negotiating death with the public by the time he sent in his mortuary school application. It had been a transition that made sense. And in the end, the degree had only cost him a few extra years post-graduation and a little dig into student loans, and now Danny had a stable 12-8 job and health insurance valid in the state of new jersey.

Today, though, the pump had that decided enough was enough. With a bang and a boom, the pump spat out a cloud of smoke and clunked uncomfortably.

The dead body sat up.

Danny scrambled over to push it back down. "No. We talked about this. Dead people don't move. If you want to stay here and have me put you back together all the time, you have to stay put. Got it?"

Whatever the weird gold-eye corpses were on in Gotham, they at least listened to him on occasion. They weren't ghosts, per se— they never pinged on any of the ghost detection devices Mom and Dad had packed in his going-away-to-college bag— but they were, despite being occasionally animate, perfectly deceased.

Weird. Danny had never gotten used to it. Still, they came in droves, too eager to sit on the top of the basement stairwell and lurk in the corners and stare endlessly at them with their weird, avian eyes, and sometimes they heralded the arrival similarly weird-ass bodies that had lost their heads or their arms or their limbs through the more conventional channels.

"I'm losing too much thread to all y'all coming in all the time," Danny complained to the dead body, who, at the moment, was the only person present to blame. "Stop getting your limbs cut off. This stuff is expensive, you know. It's a specialty order."

The body didn't even have the courtesy to blink. Rude.

"At least let them bury you this time. Every time one of you darts off when my back's turned, my boss thinks I'm stealing corpses. My coworkers think I'm building my own Frankenstein or something."

The corpse neither verbalized nor blinked, but Danny hadn't expected it to; with a sigh, he rolled the corpse back into cold storage, locked its little door (not that locking it in had ever stopped it) and called it quits for the night.

It's not like anyone was paying him for the extra hours anyway.

The whole fic on ao3

[con-dientes]

My eyes widen. “D-Do we really need to do this part? I-I'm a virgin...” I stutter in fear, staring at the speculum. “It’s for a thorough examination.” My gynecologist reassures me, snapping his gloves on. I gulp down, my legs shaking as I continue to try to convince him otherwise. “B-But I-I've never had anything up there before, not even a tampon!” He casually and genuinely laughs at my fear: “You sound really terrified!” “I am!” I snap back, “D-Does it hurt?!” He gives me a look that makes me blush. “Really? You’ve never even fingered yourself?” He asks, making me blush even more. I press my lips together, looking away. “… Can you even ask that?” I whisper in embarrassment as he laughs again.

“I’m a doctor.” He coos, “You’re in good hands, I promise.” He rubs his hands on my knees, trying to ease my concerns. I sigh, nodding. He’s right, he is a doctor; he knows what he’s doing, right?

With that, he gently spreads my pussy lips open with ease and professionalism. “Ooh, see? Easy.” He continues to comfort me. He runs a finger up and down my slit, lubing me up with my own juices. “This thing is gonna go in easily, even if you’re a virgin.” He states, staring at my pussy as he grabs the speculum. He gives me one more look before sliding the cold metal in, I wince at the pain. “Shh shh shh… You’re doing such a good job, you’re almost done.” He shuts me up with a tender whisper. Once my pussy is gaping with the speculum he begins to poke and prod inside it, making me even more wet as my pussy begins to throb, wanting more stimulation. I make little noises, biting my bottom lip as I make sure not to full out moan.

Unfortunately, he catches on a little too quickly, beginning to just tease and play with my gaping pussy, rubbing and circling my clit for fun. He zips down his pants, “I’m going to need to inspect a little more, sweetheart, now be a good girl and keep your little mouth shut.”