#most of the stuff I say on this account is a joke honestly

[jaquesmes]

What a little liar. Also what's your beef with the brits

You seem new here, deep down im a lover but beneath that im a hater and beneath that I’m a lover again

[sainns]

PINING.

𝓢. ㅤㅤthings they do to show that they like you.

OT7ㅤ✶ ㅤ (⠀gnreader⠀) . . . friend!enhypen, pre relationship, this is a revamped post from when i first started my account, sunoo's the craziest one here for sure, a singular death joke, not proofread so pls ignore typos.ㅤ817 words

lee heeseung refuses to let you carry anything. he’s made it a habit of grabbing anything that you’re holding and carrying it himself. whether it be shopping bags, your purse, a stuffed animal that he won for you, or groceries, he will be carrying it all. sure, it may be a little hard carrying 15 different bags of groceries up to your apartment but he doesn't mind. even as you complain, saying that you feel bad that he has to carry everything when you can help, he'll just laugh you off, asking you to let him do this for you. you do a lot for him (unbeknownst to you) and this is the least he can do.

park jongseong asks for your opinion on almost everything he does. he'll ask you if he should buy this shirt or that one, watch looks better, what he should eat. it’s like he lost all ability make choices for himself after he gained feelings for you, only trusting your opinion. maybe it's because he wants to have things that you like, who knows. what everyone does know is that the contanst buzzing coming from your phone? jay. he's most definitely texting you about whatever it is he feigns needing help choosing, but he can't help it if your opinion is the only one that matters to him.

sim jaeyun loves to go shopping with you; he literally begs to be able go even if you tell him that you're just going to window shop. not to mention the fact that he is so serious about shopping; he’ll put his phone on do not disturb, giving you his full attention. when you ask him was store he wants to go to he'll shake his head, claming that this trip is for you and if he reall needs something then he can go on his own time. he always ends up buying your stuff for you, waving you off as he gives the cashier his money.

park sunghoon calls you every single night just so that he can fall asleep to your voice. in the beginning he asks you about your day, listening intently and asking follow up questions. he wants to hear your voice for as long as possible, especially when he went the whole day without talking to you. when you ask about his day, though, he gives you the most basic answer possible and moves the conversation back to you. and every morning, without fail, he claims that he didn't mean to fall asleep but your voice is way too soothing for your own good. you figure that he's not telling the full truth after you hear him say goodnight and he doesn't hang up the phone.

kim seonwoo takes more pictures of you than he does of himself. you swear when you caught a glipse of his gallery you saw an album named 'yn' that featured over seven thousand photos of you. which yes, you saw correctly, he has a very full folder full of pictutes of you. most of them aren't even good but he would rather die than delete the ten, nearly identical, photos of you laughing or the blurry video he got while you were ugly crying because of some movie. he also uses them to tease you—laughing when you tell him to delete it. yeah.. he's almost all out of storage, at this point he's going to buy a burner phone just for photos of you.

yang jungwon loves to texts you updates about his day. if you think jay texts you a lot, oh man, jungwon beats him by twenty miles. he'll tell you his plans who they're with, what he's planning on eating, the cute cat family he saw on the street (pictures included). this man tells you everything, every thought he has it feels like. honestly, he only bothers going out so that he has an excuse to text you, it makes him smile brightly at his phone when he sees your responses. when you start sending him updates about your day? he gets so happy, it's his favorite part of the day to hear from you now, nothing else could ever compare.

nishimura riki does not know what personal space is. he's always touching you in some way, even if it's subtle, like your shoulders pressing together when you're sitting on the couch, watching a movie. when you walk somewhere together, you have to push him away multiple times because he's practically on top of you with how close he is. when you're hanging out with friends, he tends to wrao an arm around your shoulder or lean his head against yours. your friends tease him for it, saying that he's practically apart of you now. he glares at them playfully, gripping your hand in his as he pulls you away (he just really wants to be alone with you).

[toruro]

who in svt: asking how big their dick is and they respond with 2 pictures and a video with sounds

✘ minors dni!

seungcheol

manz is cocky as hell so i just KNOW he would be waiting for you to ask. right after you do, he'd text something like, 'you really wanna know?' and after you confirm that yeah you really wanna know, you'd put your phone down for a moment. when you pick it back up, you're met with a text from cheol with two images attached and you can't really see what it is until you open the text and nearly scream because holy hell, he'd joked about having a big dick before but you never expected him to be this big. it's fat and veiny and the thought of his thick, bulbous head just sliding between your folds has enough to send you in a frenzy. you'd call him immediately, your hand already making its way under your shorts and in your panties. when cheol picks up, he'd already be breathing heavily, and from the rustling in the background, you'd know he was jerking himself off. basically you're both needy and get each other off on the phone bc yes.

jun

he'd send it on impulse, honestly. you'd both talked about taking your relationship to the next level but hadn't really gotten there yet because of situations with your schedules not lining up and stuff and one night you're just texting him and the conversation gets a little... heated. you'd ask him how big his dick is, on the account that you're going to try and imagine it's actually him while you press your fingers into your cunt, and given that he's already hard from the image of you fingering yourself, he sends a few pics to help you out. when you open the messages, you nearly cum in seconds just because of how long and pretty his cock is, and you'd be texting him so fast telling him how wet it makes you. at this point, jun wouldn't be able to handle not having you any longer and would rush out of his place and head to yours, the fact that he'd have to wake up early the next morning be damned.

chan

he would send it less out of cockiness and more out of just wanting to give into your desires. he literally loves you so much so when you're needy one night he'd find it so cute when you impulsively ask him how big his dick is. just the thought of you thinking about him like that would be enough to make him hard and when he takes the picture, all he's thinking about his how you'd probably be plunging your fingers deep into your cunt, imagining it was him instead. now on your end, you hadn't really expected chan to show you anything. he'd be such a sweet boyfriend that when you open the file attachments on message, you nearly fall off the bed. on your screen is quite literally the most gorgeous cock you've seen—it's long and thick and there's a bead of precum that dribbles down the tip and fuck does it have you clenching around nothing. you'd get so caught up admiring the photo, you almost don't realize it when chan calls you. from there he'd say something like, "d'you like it baby?" to which you'd respond sheepishly, "yeah channie...liked it a lot." god you'd sound so fucking shy and hot chan can't believe that he won't get to sink his dick into you tonight, settling for murmuring filthy words through the phone to help you work yourself through your own orgasm.

[patricia-taxxon]

So, I watched that response stream that DeadwingDork made about my furry boinking video, here it is if you're curious.

By some accounts, this gentleman seems like he means well, with regards to pronouns he pulls the "when in doubt, they/them" gambit, which is partway there. If he finds this, I'll politely let him know I don't use they, just she & it. Thanks!

I have good reason to believe he began this journey in good faith, but over the course of the video he slowly gives up being charitable, and it's very frustrating to watch. There's a few key moments of miscommunication I noticed that I'd like to clear up.

DeadwingDork and I got off on the wrong foot very early on, and part of that's my fault. I start the video openly lusting after Garth Alphandomega, and this put him on edge. This might be an ideological difference we can't get past, he says that Garth is "Just a wolf" when I personally think he's quite different from a wolf. After that, I do the joke where I say "If the opportunity presented itself I would fuck my-" and cut to The Flowers of Robert Mapplethorpe, but he didn't have the context to understand what I'm saying by cutting to that album in particular, so he thought I was jokingly saying I would fuck my dog. He spends the rest of the stream with that initial impression of me lusting after what he perceives as literal animals, it's kinda the initial rock that starts the avalanche and closes him off from understanding basically anything that I'm saying, until the end, where he's convinced I've just spent 43 minutes coming out as a zoophile.

This might just be a difference in artistic philosophy, like he interprets Alpha & Omega to be about wolves whereas I interpret it as being about people through the aesthetic lens of wolves. Metaphor isn't just for abstract art movies, after all. Garth walks on 4 legs, but he has enough obvious persistent human-like traits both visually and behaviorally for me to understand him as a person delivered via wolf. For the same reason, he is disturbed by my lusting for Shoukichi Pompoko, because he interprets that movie as literally being about tanuki. I think this the main reason the concept of a character being "simultaneously human and inhuman" completely whiffed on him. He skimmed over my segment on how Leo can be both a wolf and hispanic & didn't understand the relevance, because I don't think that contradiction can be resolved in his head.

The most frustrating part of this stream is the way he clearly picks up on a lot of the overarching subtext that I'm putting down, but by that point in the video he doesn't have enough faith in me to interpret it as being put there intentionally. He treats the connection between my special-ed dog training and my current animal identity as an unintentional self-report, when it isn't. There's this *maddening* segment where I talk about Pom Poko for the first time, and he... honestly quite accurately picks apart the picture I'm illustrating about alienation, but he handwaves it away in favor of his horrible mangling of the exact literal sentence I am saying at that moment.

He says:

"There's clearly a story here, but it's being buried. There's a lot of stuff that's leading towards... 'oh, you watched this movie and this movie and your parents did this and your fuckin' teachers did this, and that's why this is happening.' That's like the fuckin' undertones of this video, [but] the main takeaway is supposed to be that this movie... I dunno, makes you f.. is supposed to feel like how fuckin' animal people feel like they're... whatever, I don't, I don't... whatever."

He grabs at the subtext, the story I'm obviously telling with the surface level anecdote of my experience seeing Pom Poko when I was young. I say obviously, because he and his chat both understood it. But then he discards that, assumes it was unintended, and importantly, he doesn't have a good answer for what I'm actually saying divorced from that. Because... what's even left after you remove the subtextual story I'm telling with this anecdote? The anecdote itself? Of course he's empty handed.

Other notes:

He can't decide whether I'm an over zealous recruiter trying to call everything furry, or that I'm a gatekeeper trying to force robust definitions of 'furry' into the general lexicon. This isn't very important, it's just kind of funny.

He is dismissive of me saying I won't report news if my only source is Kiwifarms, but he doesn't really give a good reason for it. I am having trouble summarizing his argument for why I should have referenced a website whose users doxxed me. He hilariously suggests that I should negotiate with them to have my address taken down, as long as I'm not a "lolcow" about it. I'll be charitable and say that I don't think he's thought this through very much.

He hates that I "compare autistic people to animals," when that really just doesn't mean anything on its own. A comparison is a comparison, a follower of mine pointed out to me they could say that trans people are like cockroaches & it could either mean they are doggedly resilient in the face of harsh circumstances or that they are pests that need to be exterminated. I meant something specific by using an animal metaphor to describe my autistic identity, and it transcends the literal reading of "calling autistic people animals."

He derisively calls Echo a "gay furry sex game" when it simply is not. I'll forgive him for this because he hasn't played it, but Echo isn't porn, it's a horror game. There's sex in it, and it has the framework of a dating game, but it is far from the main appeal. I'm not saying this to elevate Echo above the degrading label of "porn," because Adastra is definitely porn and it's almost as good, just not as easily recommendable to outsiders.

He thinks its commendable that Sean Booth bought my album, which is nice.

Overall, I don't think DeadwingDork is outwardly hateful, but he is quite gullible. He accepts hate speech at face value and buys into narratives useful for hate movements. There's echos of trans groomer panic, that old "you're the reason people are transphobic" chestnut, and of course, using Kiwifarms as a news source. He said he came into the video knowing nothing about me and had no reason to be approaching me in bad faith, but he clearly doesn't trust me enough to think the main rhetorical thrust of the video was intentional.

bad stream lol

[thesamoanqueen]

Onlyfans

Raiting: 18+

Warnings: smut.

A/N: this one-shot showed up in my mind because of John Cena and me thinking impossible possibilities.

He usually bring it with him all the time, but at home he paid no attention. He had left it on the table to go and do something when the first notification had arrived. Y/N hadn't even looked up from her laptop, too busy with the program sent from Stamford the previous evening and which she was reviewing as always before sending it back to the office. Two minutes had passed and another notification had arrived. Roman hadn't shown up then either, but when the third had been followed by a fourth, Y/N had held out her hand with a sigh. She didn't want to pry, she didn't even want to know, she justs cared about making that sound stop to work in peace and let Roman know of whoever had that urgency to talk to him.

What had appeared on the screen, however, had made her put the laptop aside without thinking twice, pushing her to get up and find out what the hell was that stuff.

She couldn't believe her eyes, it was crazy.

When she found him, he was busy with a box full of old fitness equipments, smile ready as soon as she came into his sight.

- Hey gorgeous – he greeted her and Y/N stopped to look at him, her perfect handsome man.

- Is there something you want to tell me? – she asked, holding back to give him a chance.

Roman froze completely, his gaze serious, back straight.

- whats up? – she heard him ask, pretending he didn’t know or maybe not knowing for real, Y/N at that point was not sure anymore.

- I don't know, should I?! – she immediately echoed him, refusing to prolong that game to place his phone in front of him, the message he had received still open.

Leaving aside what were their habits as a couple, habits that had never displeased either of them as far as she knew, they had established from the first moment they would discuss everything, to be open-minded and fair with their feelings. They had been on a verge of a breakup because of an unspoken nonsense, they had learned from the past and since that moment there had been nothing they hadn't shared, bad moods, doubts, problems, fears. She trusted him, she wasn't obsessed with knowing what, where or who he was with, not even knowing what revolved around him and was proposed to him before, it had never even crossed her mind. She had chosen a man, a good real man, one who wanted a family, with no fear about serious relationship and without warning now she found out an Onlyfans notification on his phone? At home? While she was there working?!

- I didn't mean to watch, there could be anything in there, whatever, but here Ro? For real? and honestly If you have a reason or not, I thought we were better than this- she said, unable to hold back any longer and immediately saw his expression change, an amused smile replacing his worried expression.

- Babygirl, slow down. We got no problem, there's nothing in there I want, trust me. I don't care about that stuff, its shit, I’d never do it when I’ve you – he winked, trying to pull her into a hug, but more he laughed more she tensed.

- ‘kay then what?!

- You know, John did it, an account… boys at work were joking, saying that I should make one too. Locker room chatter, bullshit, sometimes they still get me involved.

Surprised, she looked at him speechless, turmoil quickly slipping away, while his information created a strangely valid picture in her mind about possibilities.

John was a funny dude, strange at times and that stunt had actually made the news. She had seen some clips online, nothing R-rated as one might imagine, but she hadn't connected the two things. And she had never even thought that someone might have thought of doing it, even though she knew of Roman's fame among the fans, rumors, fantasies and the whole package on the most unlikely platforms. In some way it was her job to know what people thought about wwe’s top guy and she played with it to for promotion.

- A real onlyfans – she repeated flatly, staring at him and he gave her one of his billion dollar smiles.

- I'm quite successful, it might work – he joked and she reflexively batted her eyelashes, unable to control herself because yes, he was damn right.

People went absolutely crazy for a few well planted cameras shots, a couple of hits not so family friendly in his ring promos and that salt and pepper in his beard, a video or an entire onlyfans account would not have been simply successful, would have unleashed the apocalypse into the wrestling community. During the production phase, behind the scenes, she too had relied on certain shots, specific set-ups, because she knew they would work. There were things that she too was obsessed with despite having him as her in real life partner. If Roman would have really decided to do it, something direct, focused, if he didn't hold back…

The thought made her turn around, going back without another word.

-Y/N – Roman called her, trying to hold her, but she didn't let him do it, quickly marching towards the front door closet where she kept her purse always ready.

She knew Roman had followed her, sensing heavy footsteps behind her as she walked through the house, but when she finally started to reach for what she needed, his hand tightened around her wrist, physically stopping her from doing anything. He gave her a deadly serious look, his gaze dark as she broke free.

- Y/N it was a bad joke, ain’t gonna happen, don't take it that far – he reasoned, standing there as if no one could move him, searching her eyes.

Those brown eyes that would have made anyone's knees tremble, that had made her tremble too an infinite number of times and for the most absurd reasons, at the right times and not, everywhere, always, from the first moment, without exceptions and that now she saw slowly widen, confused, as she handed him what she had taken out of her jacquemus.

-Here – she offered, her personal credit card ready.

Roman stared at it stunned and Y/N knew she had caught him off guard, because that card never left her purse if he was around, he didn't like when it happened even though she was proudly independent he liked to play the role of her provider. With a deep breath, seeing him froze, she decided to take out the second one, adding it to the first and moving closer to slip them into his pocket.

- Let’s say you can have both, but the show is exclusive – she specified, as if they were really in a negotiation and at that last hint she felt him suddenly explode into laughter.

He throw his head back, perfect teeth showing, eyes crinkling, making every inch of his chiseled face smile.

- Someone woke up possessive – he pinched her when he was finally able to speak again and Y/N rolled her eyes playfully, letting him have that little win.

He didn’t like if someone was too close to her, if someone stared in a way or another, when they hadn't yet been in an official relationship Y/N had witnessed scenes of pure testosterone that would have made anyone run and even today he showed no signs of loosening his grip. She had found the notification of a site notoriously inclined towards certain ratings, messages with it, she hadn't worked entirely on her imagination, but were clearly details his ego ignored, too happy to have caught her.

-If your intention is to keep laughing, I'll take them back – she stopped him, stretching out her hand again to retrieve them, but as soon as she took them off, Roman grabbed her wrist.

- For you the show is free, just ask ma'am

His voice was velvetly soft, as was the touch of his thumb stroking her caramel skin. With eyes fixed on hers, she couldn't hold back a smile, seeing Roman return it immediately when he pushed her against the door.

- Then show me sir – she whispered and he twisted his head, making her giggle before lifting her up.

With legs wrapped around his hips, he carried her to the couch to place her between cushions like a precious thing, a rebellious lock hanging out of the bun. He stood there waiting, hands placed next to her, but deliberately not where he should, his whole body close, but not close enough and for a moment Y/N did nothing but admire him.

He was a charming man, the kind of man who captured attention even without anything special or fancy, he made her hands itch and her stomach flutter like the first time she had touched him and she had no longer been able to let him go. It wasn't just the appearance, but rather his attitude, his attentions, they were a drug, they were addictive and the idea of having them all to herself, having him when out there people would do anything to have a crumb of what she had, it made her feel special, in charge.

-You're playing a dangerous game – he warned her, eyes hovering over her full lips.

-Im pretty sure I can handle it – she replied, her breathing slowing as she saw him bend more.

-I know exactly what you can handle babygirl – he touched her with his nose, with that lock and Y/N felt the taste of him on her, even if Roman had kept himself at a sufficient distance not to kiss her.

From the couch, Y/N watched as he straightened up and grabbed the hem of his tank to pull it up. Her eyes went hopelessly down his body, looking in religious silence at every inch of his torso, as he undressed with unnatural calm. She watched the abs pop out even without oil to accentuate them, broad pecs, dark tattoo that stood out against tanned skin, those lines that she drew with her fingers whenever she could. And then the arms, bent to pass the shirt beyond his neck to which she used to cling, those arms that she scratched as if her very life depended on them, capable of hurting and carrying her around effortlessly, shaped by years of practice and dedication. Her pulse racing, she saw him turn to put away his shirt, showing her his broad back, his sculpted shoulders as he rolled them back to face her and let his hair down. She watched Roman run his long fingers through the messy locks, trying to fix them during that impromptu striptease in the living room, in broad daylight and anything could have happened, someone even broke into the house and Y/N would not have flinched, focused as she was on him.

He was slow, unnerving. What she would do quickly, throwing everything away, he did in slow motion, to push her desire, make her savor everything, drive her completly crazy. Every gesture seemed to require effort, every action was like a ritual, a video wouldn't have done him justice, he was directing a movie and she was the spectator unable to distract herself while his fingers loosened the knot of his shorts to make them hang on the hips. Enraptured, she followed his usually hidden v, focusing on the portion of skin he was revealing and that left no doubt about what was down there. Concentrated, she clenched her legs without hiding, heartbeat racing as he fill the space between them, a dangerous intense shadow on his eyes that made Y/N hold her breath.

- Why you so silent now sweetheart? – he asked, stopping a step away from her, looking down and Y/N raised her head, body tingling as she felt him tower above her.

-Im ejoying it… no words needed – she breathed innocently, reaching out a hand tentatively and Roman bent over once again following the wandering of fingers playing with his lace, tongue running on his lips.

- Hmm no, I think we need a reaction… feedbacks you know, for that onlyfans stuff

His voice, breathing caused another series of shocks through her, the desire to crash her mouth against him, suffocate in one of their kisses, feel his big hands ravaging her now almost unbearable. Roman locked her wrist once more, his grip hard enough to make Y/N throb where she was probably already a mess, preventing her from exploring more than she should, eyes going back into hers, digging, guiding her where he wanted, only where he let them.

-Its good – she admitted without rebelling, unable to concentrate on anything than those two brown pools that seemed to swallow her.

- Just that? – he asked, pinching her face with his hair and Y/N tilted her head, intercepting the trajectory of his lips with greed.

-More than good – she mewed, leaning forward and feeling him guide her to his erection, never breaking eye contact, avid more than ever on having her undivided attention.

- Not enough for me

Under her fingers, Y/N felt his boner awake, hard and she risked something more, a more intense touch, hoping to convince Roman to let her do something, but it lasted just a moment and he pushed her away, standing up straight again to do it himself. Y/N knew what to expect, she knew what Roman was hiding, and yet when he lowered his pants enough to release his erection and took it into his hand, Y/N couldn't hold back a gasp to the mere sigh of his delicious flesh. She saw him so proud, spit obscenely and his smile quickly turn into an arrogant grin enjoying his attentions in front of her who was now struggling to stay still.

Was the kind of show she was sure many people would sell their souls along with their houses for and that even her, despite knowing Roman's abilities, couldn't say was immune. She wasn't immune at all honestly and when he curled his mouth, carried away by the increasing euphoria, eyes still fixed on her, letting go an excited growl, Y/N jumped on her knees.

-Gawd com’here– she moaned sulkily before crashing her lips on him and Roman laughed at her kissing, his hand finally leaving his now tense erection to keep himself balanced.

-That's a feedback – he approved, watching her quickly undress beneath him.

And Y/N might have replied but her body was begging her to put an end to that game, get some relief and before Roman could decide otherwise just for playing around, she pulled him better on top, wedging his brawny body between her thighs. With one hand on his dark locks and the other feeling his cock, she slowly bit his lip asking with pleading eyes and he pushed himself into her palm, tongue ready to invade her mouth. She moaned against him, letting him move his hips, enveloped in the heat of him, in that tantalizing smell of his skin, lost in the exquisite taste of his mouth, until she heard Roman growl and only then she guided him where wanted. None had touched her, neither him nor herself and yet she felt him slip between her juicy folds with ease, in a feral curse that made her cry and pushed him to bite her neck. Holding her hip he enstablished a pace to fuck her opposite of his striptease, messy, rough, domineering, every thrust crushed her down, nailing her mercilessly and making her sweatin agony.

Sometimes she felt like she was a toy in his hands, but she liked that kind of treatment, more when they had already wasted enough time with other games and the thought of someone else wanting that attention was still in the back of her head. She ran her nails down his forearms, marking him, holding on with ragged breath, gasping with mouth open, as he grunted into the crook of her neck, sinking into her dripping pussy in a concert of obscene sounds. And in the throes of her ecstacy, Y/N made her hands roam over his massive back, over his strong neck, even over his ass contracted in the effort to pound her wildly.

She felt a well known fire building suddenly in the bottom of her belly, uncontrollably, like a wave of pure bliss when Roman pushed himself deeper, lifting without mercy her thigh over his shoulder to get a better angle, his balls slapping against her soft skin and she squirmed crying in pleasure. His grip became more possessive, almost to prevent her from run, even though she was now just a weeping mess, folds pulsing and gripping around his dick, heat growing for what was now a marvelous attack until the delirium reached her head.

- R-Roo… ple-aase…

- Ssh come for me… let it go, you wanted it cmon good girl -

One stroke and another, on that sweet lovely spot, his skin rubbing against her hot clit and Y/N closed her eyes, curling beneath him, her mind white, blank and ì mouth open without a sound to leave her soul. She felt him leave a sweaty kiss on her cheek, continue tenaciously to prolong her sensation and also lift her other leg, aiming it in a shameful, vulgar position to conquer his climax now. Stunned by her orgasm, she watched him with passionate eyes, his expression focused, body tense and furious in the last effort and Y/N placed her forehead against his, holding him in place, tightening with a sob around his cock, folds trembling. With all his weight pinning her down, he willingly went for a couple of thrusts, deep, rough, his breathing more and more heavy until it was enough for him too and Y/N pulled him against her neck, feeling every muscle of his thick body tense and his cock twitching until it fills her up.

As always, he got stuck inside her, refusing to come out until he stopped jerking, hands gripping her soft hips tenaciously to keep her in place and only when nothing was left anymore, he freed her, collapsing though against the couch headboard to pull her against him in a sweaty hug, while they caught both their breath. They probably should have rushed to take a shower, but Y/N wasn't in a hurry and he didn't seem to be either, leaving a trail of kisses on her shoulder.

- I was thinking… - she began, sore but with her fingers tracing his arm anyway.

- Gimme ten minutes and we'll do another live

Tag squad: @sunnyfleur23 @racerchix21 @alyyaanna @reignsangel444 @romanreignsdefencesquad @romanstheory @claymorexpunisher @keybladeofsteel @msbigredmachine @nayys-world @gobbersworld @utika151209 @cumxxslutt @civildawn @romanmydaddy @triscillal @papireigns-05 @helensanders92 @joannasteez @darqchilddaydreamz @meggylynnloves @unfriendly--blvck--hottie @nicolewoo @reignsx @reigns-central-blog @kianaleani @daguenoire @extra-11 @thedonsfactory @snowpanda18 @brattyfics @mzv11 @romanreignseater @tribalchiefdaily @2baddies2furious @vebner37 @depressedneedingrevenge @cyberdejos2 @mahi-wayy @jxtina-86 @harmshake @southerngirl41 @smile1318 @spritelucozade

[animesimp-writes]

YO, YO, YO! (Billy referred.) Hope your having a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night Mel! Could you write a Luffy x fem! Reader fic? Like They're making jokes on the deck of the thousand sunny while the rest of the crew is asleep, and Luffy calls Y/N pretty and stuff, and then confesses, saying that Robin and Nami told him he was in love with her after describing how he felt about Y/N?

If you don't want to write it, thats okay (bc I dont know if you write for other fandoms) but stay safe and stay hydrated! :)

-Anon <3

# Summary ; Late one night aboard the Thousand Sunny, Y/N and Luffy find themselves alone, sharing jokes and laughter under the stars. As the conversation takes a sincere turn, Luffy surprises Y/N by telling her she's pretty and confessing that Nami and Robin pointed out he might be in love with her. Realizing his feelings are true, Y/N admits she feels the same, if not more. Before she can fully express herself, Luffy kisses her, sealing their mutual affection with a sweet and tender moment.

# Notes ; Heyy!! I LOVE One Piece, its my favorite anime for years <3 It's my first time writing a fic instead of headcanons ON TUNBLR so I'll do my best :D Also, yes, I am writing for other fandoms, so please don't be shy to request. And sorry for being away for so long, I just needed some time for school and I honestly forgot about this account and had to study since I'm going to high school in a few months. Wish me luck!!

Late at night, the Thousand Sunny drifted peacefully under a blanket of stars. The gentle rocking of the ship kept the Straw Hat Pirates lulled in a deep sleep. Everyone, that is, except for Luffy and you.

You were sitting next to him on the deck, the night air cool against your skin. The only sounds around were the occasional creaks of the ship and the soft lapping of the ocean against the hull.

"Y/N, you know, I think I could eat a thousand meat skewers in one sitting!" Luffy said with a wide grin, his eyes sparkling in the moonlight.

You chuckled softly, shaking your head. "Luffy, I believe you could do it. But how would you even fit that much food in your stomach?"

He laughed, the sound warm and carefree, and you couldn't help but laugh along with him. The way he made everything seem so simple and joyful was one of the many things you loved about him. For what seemed like hours, the two of you exchanged jokes, stories, and silly banter. Luffy was on a roll, saying the most random things to keep you laughing. But as you waited for him to crack another joke, his expression softened. His gaze settled on you, and the intensity in his eyes caught you off guard.

"You're really pretty, Y/N," Luffy said suddenly, his voice quiet, but sincere.

You blinked, a little taken aback by the shift in tone. "W-What?" you stammered, feeling your cheeks warm as you processed his words. "Why would you say that all of a sudden?"Luffy rubbed the back of his neck, his usual confident demeanor now tinged with something more thoughtful. "Well, Nami and Robin were talking to me the other day. They said that when I described how I feel about you, it means I’m in love with you. And I think they’re right… 'cause I’m always thinking about you, and I like being around you more than anyone else."

Your heart skipped a beat. Hearing those words from Luffy, who was always so focused on his adventures and dreams, made your chest tighten with happiness. You glanced down at your hands, fidgeting nervously, trying to find the right words to tell him that you felt the same way. "Luffy, I… I feel the same," you began, your voice barely above a whisper. "Maybe even more than you could imagine..."

Before you could finish your sentence, you felt a gentle touch on your chin. Luffy had leaned in closer, lifting your head with his hand. Your eyes met his, and in that moment, the world around you seemed to fade away. Without another word, Luffy closed the distance between you, pressing his lips softly against yours. The kiss was simple, sweet, and filled with all the emotions you both had been holding back. Your eyes fluttered closed as you melted into the kiss, your heart racing in your chest.

When he finally pulled away, Luffy's smile was the brightest you'd ever seen. "I think I like kissing you too," he said with a chuckle.

You giggled, your cheeks flushed, feeling a mixture of joy and relief. "Me too, Luffy… me too."

GAHHH!! I loved it so much, hope you guys do to! If you want more like this, drop a request in my "Ask Me Anything" hope you guys have a wonderful rest of your day, bye! <3

[jeonscatalyst]

Hey May, welcome back we missed you so much and I'm so happy you are back.

What are your thoughts about AYS so far? Loving it?

Hey anon, thank you so much and I missed y’all too so much.

I actually have alot of thoughts about AYS so far and I might be making a more detailed post later but if there is any particular thing you would like to get my thoughts on, you can shoot me an ask.

I think AYS so far has been amazing. The first two episodes gave a more calm and domestic vibe as we just got to watch Jimin and Jungkook go about normal daily activities as well as doing a few fun stuff like going camping, kayaking, yacht rides, motobike rides etc but I never thought i’d see the day where Jimin and Jungkook would head out to walmart to get a sponge to do dishes lol.

I think Episodes 1 and 2 gave us a closer look at what I always imagined Jimin and Jungkook’s off days would look like. By off days, I mean days where they weren’t working. I had mentioned before that one of the biggest things that convinced me about the possibility of Jikook being more than friends was how real they are. It’s the good, the bad and the ugly and the way their story so far with all it’s ups and downs makes perfect sense in the context of things.

While watching them, I couldn’t help but smile at how domestic and comfy they looked doing such simple everyday chores and activities. Getting out of bed, Jungkook immediately going to lay by Jimin’s side and just bask in his presence and company right before they start their day. It was also so refreshing to see how Jimin and Jungkook don’t necessarily need to be doing or saying alot to actually just enjoy being by each other’s side. I had mentioned this before in one of my post from my previous account. They have such an interesting dynamic and I would be lying if I said I don’t get fascinated at times.

I didn’t love the fact that Jimin was sick most of the time though but I thought it was so cute how Jungkook took care of him and how he also tried to make light of the situation by making jokes about it. Jungkook’s ability to tease Jimin in any and every situation is very telling of how comfortable he feels with Jimin. He doesn’t always have to try being the nicest or trying not to laugh in certain situations. The more you know someone and the more comfortable you are with someone, you show them more of the authentic you. You laugh when you find something funny without being too worried of how you might come off because you know that, that person knows YOU. It’s the same way your best friend would laugh at you after you fall before they think of helping you up while a friend or an acquaintance would help you and subdue the laughter for fear of upsetting you because they might not know how you would take it, while a bestfriend knows that sometimes that fun is better than feeling sorry for yourself. While some other people have shown concern about how Jk chose to handle certain things by claiming that he wasn’t careful enough, I think that is very on brand for Jikook and anyone who knows them, and has paid close attention to them all these years knows that.

Jk would scold Yoongi for teasing Jimin about saying “Sorry” at the UN and ask him to make Jimin feel better instead of teasing him, but will later tease Jimin about the same thing to make him laugh. It’s like he hates it when other people tease him but knows that he can because Jimin knows and he feels that his teasing makes things better for Jimin or atleast makes him laugh. I mean on rookie king, Jk told us that he teases Jimin alot because he like him so much and Jk had also admitted that he likes the reaction he gets when he teases Jimin. Need I say more? I honestly love how realistic Jikook feel.

I also noticed that Jimin really has a problem not helping when he sees someone else doing something even for him. At the camping site, Jungkook was in charge of cooking and all but Jimin just couldn’t sit still even though he had a stomach bug and went to go help in slicing the onions. In episode two, after they got back from walmart, Jimin again just couldn’t let Jk make the carbonara without helping in some way. He lingered around for a bit and then went to start cooking the kebab. Let’s not even talk about how he immediately jumped up to help the pregnant waitress at the first place they stopped to eat. He is the sweetest human alive.

Jungkook is not so different. I have always mentioned that Jungkook is the most sensitive and one of the most thoughtful people ever and it is kinda sad that many people misunderstand him because of his looks. The way he always thinks about the staff is so wholesome. The way he felt bad about the staff not having anything to eat and made sure he gave them something to eat was so beautiful.

As I said earlier, I have alot to say about AYS but will do that later. So generally, I think the first two episodes were absolutely amazing and just gave us a glimpse of domestic Jikook (we ofcourse should expect that things should be a little different when they are not being filmed) and it was just as I had imagined.

Episode 3 felt like a completely different show. While the first two episodes were more domestic and calm, episodes 3 felt more like run bts to me. I guess this was because of all the games they played and that fact that it just lacked that homely feel that episode 1 and 2 had but episode 3 was probably the most interesting to so many people for so many reasons.

There was a third member, there were more upbeat activities than just sailing on a yacht, cooking at home, cuddling in bed or going shopping. I also think Tae being around helped Jikook relax more. In the first two episodes, they seemed relaxed around each other but there was still this tense air that I could sense, you know that tense, awkward energy that Jikook always have around them when they are too aware of the cameras? Yes that one but with Tae in the mix, they had a buffer of sorts and someone else they could interact with to make things more “normal”. I think it was beautiful seeing Vminkook together just living. Jimin wasn’t feeling his best at the beginning but it seems like things got better before the day was over and I think with episodes 1,2 and 3 we could really see how different Jikook’s dynamic is when they are alone Vs when they are with another member (we ofcourse cannot get the full picture with them being filmed and everything but atleast we got an idea).

PS: Tae was an absolute ray of sunshine. I noticed that he seems to be back to his fun, chaotic, quirky and slightly weird self and I love that. I had missed that Tae so much.

Let me know if there anything else in particular you would like me to talk about.

[buddiebeginz]

I was talking to a friend earlier and it got me thinking about something.

B*mmy stans project all of the stuff they do onto us to an extent I've never seen with any other fandom discourse before.

They call us homophobic for not liking B/T or T*mmy. Yet they hate on people for shipping Buddie or seeing Eddie as queer. To the point of harassing people for including Eddie and Buddie in pride posts. Continually harassing the 911news account and even trying to dox a journalist for posting about Buddie.

They call us delusional for having watched two men love and support one another for 6 going on 7 years and for thinking there could be something more than friendship there. Even though Oliver, Ryan, and Tim have all said they see what we see. Yet they've seen Buck kiss a guy twice, have very minimal screen time or development and they headcanon that they're in love and will get married in the coming season.

They say we fetishize Buddie. Yet most of the time when our fandom is discussing our ship we're talking about the emotional connection between them. Or how we want to see them finally be together in a canon romantic relationship or as a full fledged family (with Chris). Or have their first kiss. Meanwhile most of their posts are the kind of sex they headcanon Buck and T*mmy have. Hell after that that dinner scene tons of them changed their urls to something with daddy in it (referencing the out of place daddy kink joke). To be clear there's nothing wrong with headcanons about fictional characters sex lives. But the main reason most of us ship Buddie is not just because they're two hot guys who we want to think about f*cking, it's because we're invested in the story of their life together. The same can't be said for B/T.

They say we feminize Buck for Buddie:

Meanwhile most of their fics/art/headcanons involve T*mmy being the big strong protector rescuing the "damsel in distress" Buck. They constantly talk about how hot it is that T*mmy is this big older "daddy" firefighter who can take care of Buck and guide him in what it means to be in a m|m relationship.

They say we've made Buck's coming out all about Buddie but 1. Eddie and Buck's feelings for him were heavily included in Buck's bi awakening ep. 2. They have made T*mmy synonymous with buck's coming out to the point of saying Buck wouldn't have even realized he liked men without T*mmy. They've even said that if T*mmy and Buck were to break up in s8 that it would ruin Buck's coming out story.

They accuse our fandom of being mean and of harassing the actors including of sending death threats to Lou. Of chasing Lou off of social media and being the one who caused him to stop his cameos. They say we're the reason Oliver chooses not interact with Lou or anything B/T related online. When there has been no proof of any of this. Meanwhile there is proof from their own fandom that Oliver and Ryan have blocked some of them. They have repeatedly tried to pressure Oliver to interact with B/T posts and Lou. They were also leaving comments on the the video of the podcast Ryan did (with Tommy DiDario) where he talked about his s*icide attempt, telling him he should have finished the job.

They call us a cult or BoBs (Buddie or Bust) yet they dress up like Lou and would still be paying for his videos if he was still willing to put them out. They prioritize Lou/T*mmy above any other character on the show. They talk about how T*mmy should get a begins episode. How T*mmy should be a main character. They defend everything T*mmy has ever done including when he was racist and homophobic to Chim and Hen. They harass anyone who has a negative word to say about their ship or Lou or T*mmy much like a cult would protect their leader. They to this day act like everything Lou ever told them in his cameos is the gospel truth.

911 fandom has grown increasingly toxic ever since B/T became a thing and I honestly just can't wait for the day we either find out T*mmy isn't coming back or when his last ep will be. I mean in some ways our fandom won't ever be the same after this. I've seen a lot of ugly sides to people who I had followed for years as Buddie shippers.

It will never not confuse the hell out of me that some people who were big time Buddie shippers for years not only dropped Buddie but turned completely against the ship and our fandom. And all for a ship that is seriously underdeveloped and one that it's clear the show is telling us in flashing neon lights isn't meant to last.

[reikunrei]

feeling incredibly averse to posting this but i'm just gonna drop my kofi link here in case anyone wants to help me get out of my increasingly shitty situation living with my parents

more info below ig

after having given my parents nearly $100k over the last four years, i'd love to be able to actually leave. my future job situation is still up in the air (i've submitted for about a dozen positions and the only one i've heard back from and interviewed for hasn't gotten back to me yet), and i haven't been able to build up any savings because, again, i was (and still am) helping my family afford rent and bills, and probably the taxes my parents are behind on, but if i think about that, i'll get too angry. no joke, i've given my family, at the bare minimum, 85% of my income over the last 4 years. the rest of it has gone toward medical stuff and, now, my car

at this point, with the combo of my mom refusing to lower her standards and my dad's seeming refusal to hunt for a new full time job, i don't see how they won't continue to bleed me dry. my dad even has a bad habit of taking money out of my old savings account that he's a joint owner on or whatever from when i got it set up when i was 16, even when i stopped actively putting money in it, so now any time it gets its automated $1 transfer from my checking account, he'll just take that $1 without consulting me. i'm not exaggerating, even if it has $1-2 in it, it'll be gone within a week

i've even put off starting on testosterone because of this. i wanted to start it like 3 years ago, but kept putting it off because of money issues and wanting to save as much as possible. i got really close to actually starting it this year, but because of how messy everything is, i put it off again bc having one more thing on my plate, especially when my parents are already weird about me being trans, was not something i wanted to deal with

not to mention, we're still currently not living under a lease in our house that we're, as far as i'm aware, still tens of thousands of dollars behind in rent on (again, my dad refuses to disclose our financial position honestly with any of us) and it's developed many, many issues bc the landlord, even before we were behind on rent, is shit and refuses to actually fix anything. and my dad loves to just ignore things unless we beg him to do something

i'd love to be on my own (in the, much more affordable, midwest) by the end of summer. i by no means want to rely on donations and i have other avenues i'm working with to make money (i still have my current full time job, but i'm going through my old belongings and selling a lot online), but i'll take any help i can get atp because i'm truly at my wits end. i'd start doing art commissions again if i could, but doing that from 2020-2022, partially on top of my full time job, absolutely wrecked my right hand and i'm still in enough pain that i can't make it a regular activity

idk how much else there is to say. there's more i could say but... i don't really wanna air all my dirty laundry here. i'm miserable in so many ways and it's just become increasingly clear that my dad expects me to constantly cover his ass. my younger brother gives money too, but he manages to go on big cross-country and overseas trips with friends, so i think i've been stuck with the burden of giving the most money. there's so many more things going on in the world rn and everyone is stretched thin so i don't expect much, or anything, but. idk. might as well throw it out there, right?

i’ve also since taken down the gfm i set up last year when we got our first eviction notice bc, while we still need the money, i don’t feel right keeping it up for multiple reasons, including “i don’t want to give any of that money to my family” and it feels too… serious to keep it up when i could just throw out my kofi instead

i just want to make sure i have some sort of safety net to catch me if i move before anything job-wise is finalized. i need to be able to afford a place to live for at least a month so i can job-search while physically being in the area i wanna move to, which would ultimately make it easier for me to find a job at all. i'm working on being more firm with giving less money so i can actually have the means to move and be safe and comfortable, but... that never lasts long in this house

anyway. that's it, i guess. thanks for reading

[exaltedfuzz]

Goddammit, your last lanamia comic made me cry.. What master storytelling spirits are you channeling that make you know these characters better than the original writers?

Deepest apologies... I have worse planned. Poor Mia. (and Lana... but you'll see why I say poor Mia soon enough, I hope...)

As for writing characters, it really helps to talk to yourself in their "voices" to try and figure them out. Mumble to yourself when you're cooking, when you're walking and nobody's around, but also listen to people speak. When you put what you know into dialogue it sounds way less phony than if you're purely trying to advance plot with ham-fisted exposition... Though you need a bit of that too, if you're trying to drive something. It's good to write stuff down in a script, get a recording app out, say it all (put on a different voice for each character, why not?) and when you stumble over the sentences because they suck to say out loud, rewrite them so they don't. Your most powerful tool in writing speech is speaking. 

Think about the context too, it's dead important. Surrounding events and characters are what keep things grounded... Nothing exists in a vacuum. It's really useful that AA has such a packed world, with so many characters in proximity. Makes it easier to de-vacuum things. I guess the same is true for most fan works. 

Having a start and end point really helps. But, more so in a sense of "where is this character at the start of this scene, and what do they want to achieve". When you're writing "aspirationally" like this, you can get into the groove better than if you have a point A and a point B that you are looking to get to overall. And then considering the dynamics between the characters and taking that into account when understanding how those goals may be compromised, ignored, pushed for... Who has the most power in a scene generally decides what goal is pushed towards. 

Another thing is focalised narrative. Usually when I'm doing these comics (at the moment), I follow Lana, and most of the emotional core is in her reactions to things. You don't want to zero in too much to one character, or you'll end up flattening the rest, but having a core character is a good way to keep things simple. It's tempting to just chuck as many characters as you can into something, but you have to remember that you're then going to have to have them all exist... 

Also, honestly, going back to the source text plenty, and with an eye for specifics, is really useful. Take note of how characters refer to each other, which is a huge thing in AA specifically... And also what humanity is in them. For Lana, for instance, she's quite witty, and quick to make light of herself with that wittiness. ("Oh, this? I cut myself by accident. When I stabbed him, that is. I'm not very good at being a criminal, I suppose.") I try to put this slightly irritating joking into how I write her. With Ace Attorney characters, you're looking at them at very intense points in their "lives", so they're probably acting differently to normal, but picking up on these little things can make all the difference. Obviously, as well, there’s the “that… was probably why she was attracted to me” line. I take this as a reluctance to publicly acknowledge the mutuality of said attraction… (“Intellectually” seems like a Lana-ism to deflect that Ema picked up, to me. Lana doesn’t seem to be very comfortable with who she is in general. She wears her King of Prosecutors medals when Edgeworth seems to think the award is tacky, and even Manfred, obsessed with achievement and perfection, and apparently winner of multiple King awards, doesn’t display his medals. Obviously this is because when they were designed, it was before the idea of King of Prosecutors existed, but I think that Lana pinning her achievements to her chest where they can clearly be seen in order to convince to both those around her and, more pressingly, to herself, that she is competent is interesting.) Her own goals also always come second to Ema. I think she’s probably felt quite suffocated by having to spend her whole adulthood so far being a mother to her.I have a lot of thoughts on her as a character, both in the context of lanamia and outwith. She’s very compelling to me, and although most of the time when I'm drawing her, it's the "used to be so gentle, always smiling" Lana that we never actually see in game, I want to push some of these key aspects of her in game identity into her, so I interpret that "gentleness" as a slight nervousness, and that "always smiling" as something mostly for Ema's sake, so she doesn't have to see her rock crumble, so to speak. Anyway, that's enough on her...

I don't know if you really wanted my dialogue writing tips, but anyway. There they are. I wrote way more than I meant to, so sorry about that, haha! Hope some of this could be useful.

I don't know that I know the characters better than their creators... I only hope I'm doing them and the stories I think they could have lived in justice. Thank you very much for the ask, haha!

[the-s1lly-corner]

Maybe TADC Characters X Reader who loves gossip?

TADC cast x reader who loves to gossip!

Okok I know I have a track record of saying ik only goinv to answer a few asks then go to bed but I think I might actually

Go to bed soon

Im still feeling unwell and tbh its been getting worse; what was originally stuffy noses and sore throat is now that + fatigue and headaches (but no more sore throat!! Yay!)

Very bad sinus pain though

So uh uh

Only a handful of requests tonight then I might try to sleep

Very short since I'm sick + im on mobile + not many ideas are happening here <\3

CAINE:

Now caine looooooves to gossip, not even as a malicious thing he just likes speculating what the silly people in this circus do when hes not around

I like to think that caine definitely would play match maker should a circus member fall in love with someone, so he asks you for any and all details and secrets

POMNI:

Probably uses your habit of gossiping to try to find an exit. I mean you have a lot of into on other people, what's to say you dont have info on other things? Its worth a shot, at least in her eyes

Thus leads to her uncomfortable sitting next to you while you spew a bunch of stuff that happened before she joined the circus

RAGATHA:

Definitely on the side of "I dont like talking about people behind their back especially if its something petty or none of my business"

Obviously venting is a different story but this ask is specifically about gossip

I don't think she would like gossiping that much, other peoples business isnt her business you know?

Politely asks you to not involve her

JAX:

Jax probably has lied about another circus member before. Harmless rumors, of course, ones that are totally outrageous and only the more gullible would believe

So you two make a powerful duo, when we also take his pranks and jokes into account...

KINGER:

I think he likes some basic gossip. Like a "I heard (x) said (y) to (z), can you believe that" kind of gossip

But does it count as gossip if hes just relaying something most of the other crew knows?

Probably not but given his state of mind half the time can you really blame him?

ZOOBLE:

I took she would occasionally engage on gossip

Is it still considered gossip if its just shit talking, though? Because boy, I really do headcannon that zooble does NOT like jax in particular

Honestly you two can probably sit down and talk about stuff for HOURS

GANGLE:

Very awkward about it, similarly to ragatha I dont think she would be too big of a fan of gossiping about others

Gangle strikes me at the type to keep to herself and mind her own business tbh, not much else to say

Kind of just quietly let's you talk, very obviously doesnt want to engage in the gossip

[hdhdgsgs]

Hi Hi! Idk how I ended up here lol (maybe through Bard’s page?? idk) anyway! I see that you’re writing for Osomatsu San right now! Would I be able to request your headcanons on every matsu comforting their crying significant other? Pleeeeease? lol I love the comfy stuff

First post back from writers block/burn out, I know some aren’t as long as others and I’m sorry it’s not consistent but I love the idea!

Osomatsu

For a little bit after you start crying he’s stunned, he’s not sure what to do. He’s comforted his brothers before but they’re his brothers, you’re a whole different person that he hasn’t learnt his whole life to comfort.

He’ll pay your back first then offer an awkward hug that turns into cuddling and crying into him with him rubbing the back of your hair and saying how you’ll be ok, kissing your head every now and then.

If you don’t want to be physically touched he’ll just tell you it’ll be okay and that he’ll listen if you need to talk, just constant sweet talking and he’ll throw in a little flirting or joking around if he feels like it’ll make you feel better.

He’ll even offer his beer or to eat instant ramen with him, he might even ‘force’ (ask) his mother to make him and you something, to which she would say yes and comfort you as much as she could and as she’s raised 6 kids at the same time, she’s pretty good at it.

He’ll offer you sex, half-joking, but if you take him up on his offer he’d be delighted to help, whether that means fast and rough or slow and sweet. He’d totally even be willing to get none of the pleasure himself because he wants to make you feel good (and he’s a pervert), you deserve it after all.

Karamatsu

He’s read up on this a LOT before so he can understand and comfort his future partner. He loves you and asks before every little thing he does, if you want ANYTHING he’ll run all over Tokyo as fast as he can to get it for you. If his brothers are around he’ll either boss them into doing things for you or he’ll threaten them to stay as far away as possible so you can be in piece.

Affection needed? He’s ready, he’ll do anything to make you happy, even if it’s (not shaming anyone) kissing your feet. He’s ready, cuddles are elite and he’s petting you everywhere he knows you like, kisses galore and touching places he knows makes you giddy. At one point he thinks about tickling you to see you laugh but he decides against it after thinking for a minute.

For gifts and acts of service, he’ll go ALL over Tokyo, fuck, even Japan if he has to, all to make you happy. If he can’t afford he WILL beg, steal and take what he needs to. He will empty everyone he knows bank account, or maybe just hatabou’s cuz he’s rich.

You want words of affirmation? He’s got it, words sweeter than ever before come out of his mouth, comforting and reassuring you until his vocal cords stop working and still then he’ll write it all down. He won’t joke around until he knows you feel good enough, so he will test the waters, every now and then with little jokes before unleashing his attack of humour to make you laugh.

Quality time, no problemo. He’s sitting and laying and standing around, just being with you, if you don’t want to talk he won’t, he’ll give you tissues, water, a plush, ice cream and just sit with you. He isn’t used to not talking for so long but he will anything for his karamatsu angel.

Choromatsu

Worst one of all of them, but he’s trying his best. He will pat your back and say “it’s not that serious, you’ll be okay.” Please get mad at him… he isn’t hurt by it for the most part, he’s used to a lot worse by his brothers.

Eventually he’ll learn and get better but at the start he’s grossly bad for someone who reads romance manga on the daily. He might try things he sees there, affection and tissues/water but after a while he’ll honestly just sit next to you and stare into space. He’s perplexed.

If you ask him about getting something or doing something for you, he will be a dork and salute, immediately getting up to help. He might put on some idol shows on tv or try and distract you by putting together a figurine with you. Choromatsu would offer a beer or sake to cheer you up, since it always makes him feel better (even though that’s unhealthy). Some more of his ideas include forcing Totty to search up ways to help, making his brothers embarrass themselves to make you laugh or running around doing things for you (which they will do in the hope you might like them too because you were able to fall for Choromatsu, but they won’t make it that obvious). Cuddles are a thing choromatsu has always been hesitant about, meaning he has to be insanely vulnerable, but he’ll throw away all vain the second he sees you upset.

Ichimatsu

Panics but keeps it on the inside so you wont stress more. He decides to treat you the same way he treats cats, only knowing how to cheer them up. So he’ll buy you food or get it from his cupboards and pet your head. He’ll whisper sweet nothings in your ear while giving your head a massage (which he’s surprisingly good at) making sure to focus behind your ears and the top of your head. Ichimatsu loves getting kisses but he’s not too confident on giving them so he won’t kiss your lips for his own comfort but he will kiss everywhere else, up your arms, your neck, your face, your head, everywhere else however if you ask him directly he will buck up and give you a small kiss on the lips, followed by more as he gets more confident. Orders his brothers around if you need something since he’s giving you affection at the moment.

Sends out a cat signal(idk) and gets all the little fluffy bois in the area to come and cuddle up! (As a chubby girl myself) He WILL put you on his lap for cuddles, he doesn’t care about weight at all whether you’re underweight, average or overweight. He wants to hold his kitten no matter what. If you end up eating something he’ll physically feed you like a baby, feeling very protective.

Jyushimatsu

Cat eyes, thinking face. Stays like that for a few second then runs around grabbing everything he can think of. Blankets, pillows, stuffed animals, water, tissues, a baseball, snacks and one of his hoodies. He brings it all and offers them, setting up a calm little area and wiping your tears with his sleeves, finding it more intimate than tissues.

Jyushimatsu sings a little song while laying you back on his chest and rubbing your back. He’s very used to comforting Ichimatsu so if you don’t want to be held he’ll know exactly how to help, he might even ask ichimatsu to help him get a cuddly cat for you. Wiggles his arms and and does the water trick too, but if you don’t respond he’ll stop immediately. Sits next to you and writes a love letter, detailed with all his feelings for you, he puts it in an envelope, seals it and hands it to you like you couldn’t see the whole thing being made, he’s VERY bashful about it too. Jyushi will also make you drink water to rehydrate and whisper meow over and over again in a sing song voice because he knows it helps Ichimatsu so surely it’ll help you right? Just need a distraction? He’ll talk about baseball for hours, the history, his favourite players, the rules and how to play it.

Todomatsu

Best equipped to handle it, doesn’t go about it well. Todomatsu doesn’t, in fact, use his phone. He feels it would be gross to use his phone when his partner needs comfort, and he panics wanting them to know he loves them more than life itself but not knowing how. He pulls you into a tight hug, telling you it’s going to be okay and that he loves you. Todomatsu will run his hand up and down your back while the other one is in your hair massaging the back of your head. He will push away his feelings of discomfort for a second to grab his phone, putting on soft music to help you relax, including a playlist he made especially for when he got a partner and he needed to comfort them. If Totty even sees a glimpse of a brother in the corner of his eye, they will be gone as soon as possible to make you feel safer and calmer. He hums along while he tries to make you fall asleep in his arms, I’m all honesty Todomatsu will do ANYTHING for his partner, he won’t let you go a single day feeling sad or bad because he truly adores you more than anything in the whole universe.

[accio-victuuri]

BJYX and Tennis 🎾🎾🎾🎾

this is a long overdue post related to a popular cpn among us and a shared interest for zz and wyb. it’s interesting that both of them have picked up this sport in a span of time that’s mostly close to each other. while you can argue that it’s a popular sport and anyone can pick it up, when it comes to them, it adds to the pattern of them liking something at the same time. why is it always them? 😂😂😂😂

i wanna say that there is really no “big evidence” out there that we know of yet, but i think it’s still an important one. maybe one day a piece will come up and we can revisit.

GG and Tennis

between them, gg picked it up first, or publicly showed off his love for it. As early as 9/2022 during the Loreal Pro live, he shared some recent stuff he’s been enjoying which were badminton, billiards and tennis.

11/2022 he became more partial of tennis when XZS shared photos and videos of him playing the sport. as soon as he did, even the china open weibo account invited him to come on over and play. tho ZZ is not known to be the most sporty person out there, it ties up with his desire to be more fit. during that time, we have seen ZZ who was working out often. so playing tennis seems to be a rational step, tho at the time, we didn’t know how it could contribute to CPN. he also had said in other interviews that he wants to try and do more things, which is so similar to how wyb approaches his life and why i believe they work so well together. 🤍

then in the next events that he attended and interviews, you can see him saying tennis more often.

Weibo TV Internet Video Summit Red Carpet:

“Exercise is a way to relax and relieve stress. If I had to say, tennis (is my favorite).”

Weibo night 2023 sina interview:

“If you ask about my favorite sport probably its tennis.”

he loves it so much, that when he shared a photo of his snowman last year, the heart he used is a tennis vibration dampener/ shock absorber. a silent nod to his love for the sport.

WYB and Tennis

what got me questioning the timeline of us saying that XZ started the whole tennis mania was yibo saying recently that he is playing tennis again. tho what i can only find is a 2015 video of him showing how he is playing tennis — which looks more like he was acting and doing it as a joke compared to now where he is obsessed with it. tho their hobbies should always be out there and spoken in public, knowing how quickly he picks things up, i don’t doubt he played the sport at one point before his other interests took over.

fast forward to now, starting the whole tennis story during chanel shenzhen where he was photographed playing and even the instructor posted about it. to being decked out in lacoste tennis gear. it was a quick switch cause we knew he has in his golf phase and then the love for tennis seemed to come from nowhere. we knew that the golf love was fueled by his co star from chang feng po lang. so who is the influence this time?

the evidence we see of him being in love with tennis started with bystander promos and then the recent post of ybo. i don’t know if we are gonna get more bits, unless he finds another hobby.

AND NOW IT’S CPN TIME. 🤍

the clowning immediately started as soon as wyb showed interest in the sport and we connected it to xz. which is usual for us cause we are cpfs! the speculation being, wyb played tennis before them dropped it. xz became a fan of the sport and most likely talked to wyb about it, hoping he would play with him. maybe they did play together at some point then wyb was lured into it lol. and now, it’s his new his favorite. i would honestly cackle if xzs somehow releases a clip of him playing tennis again. so/os are saying wyb is leeching or something but they don’t know it’s what boyfriends do! share each other’s likes!

recently, there were talks about a mystery photo of WYB going around that some are thinking is a time that they played together and that’s why WYB was cropped out. @rainbowsky talked about that here. but personally, i think this him with some friends or maybe an instructor + casual players. whoever posted that just wanted to share wyb’s photo. i’m not sure about the comments, but some are saying this place is close to where weibo night took place — an event they attended together. which makes people feel more 👀 about it.

their rackets are different but that doesn’t say much. they could use whatever they want. it’s weird tho that the recent ybo video posted had the brand of the racket blurred out when it wasn’t in the previous video. so why now?

ultimately, what attracts us to this cpn is the possibility that they play tennis together. also how they influence each other. whatever it is, i just hope they continue to go for the things they love and we will be here to support them. 💛

-END.

[all-pacas]

I saw some of your posts saying how observant and clever Chase is,while also being a "dumb whore". I feel like this is the right place to say that I don't find his "ditzy slut" moments funny in isolation,without taking his cunning,calculating traits into account. If Chase is just a "himbo",it takes away the shock value(not to mention I've seen way funnier "simple dumbasses" than "isolated Chase moments"). On the other hand,a guy who can clearly think on his feet making terrible mistakes that could be avoided by a bit of common sense is a recipe for hilarious "wtf?" moments. Like,I've seen you deduce stuff with striking accuracy with minimal information,how did you come with such an inane conclusion? It's what they call "high intelligence,low wisdom".

Also,I saw a post of you saying Foreman is "book-smarter" than Chase,while the latter is more observant and a "people-person",besides having more "improvising" skills. This is certainly interesting,considering their backgrounds(Foreman was raised in the hood,had some involvement with gangs;whereas Chase was a rich brat with many opportunities. One would think their skillsets would be inverted,lol)

Even before I finished reading this comment, I was planning on making a "he's a high in/low wisdom," so thanks for making that joke for me, lol.

The thing is, Chase is legitimately very lazy. Or like. He works hard and he's very good at his job, but I think it's interesting that both his specialties are… obviously to be a doctor you have to be smart, but he has very hands on specialties. His job isn't to memorize and know everything about auto-immune diseases, his job is to be great at cutting people open and fixing them. Again, I am well aware surgeons and intensive care takes a lot of knowledge! But it's interesting to me, you know? He definitely comes off as less cerebral.

And he's deeply unambitious. He spends half the show in a fellowship, a training program, because he's more comfortable there. Cameron and Foreman have a subplot about writing articles; we never hear anything about Chase doing the same. House literally has to fire Chase to get him off the team. Where Foreman is always desperately trying to prove himself and be the best doctor in the room, and where Cameron is honestly also deeply competitive and demands respect, Chase… we joke about him being spineless, he is spineless, but also he never really seems to mind it. He doesn't care. He does not seem offended Foreman keeps getting put in charge, nor does he really want it for himself. He has the most seniority of the fellows, but never plays it up; he's fine where he is. And I think that's where his 'laziness' comes in. He just… doesn't try very hard. Very rich kid of him, tbh. He coasts whenever possible.

Meanwhile Foreman is a huge perfectionist, and has a huge inferiority complex. He is the first to tell everyone he had perfect grades (he tells Chase a time or two), went to top schools, has a perfect resume, because Foreman derives a lot of his self worth from being able to say that: if he's the best, no one can say he doesn't belong. I think it's because of his background that he's like this: he's a Black man from a Bad Neighborhood and has a Record and he's absolutely aware what that makes him in the eyes of others. He can't afford to be like Chase — Chase can get away with being lazy and unambitious because he's a rich, good looking, white guy (and foreign, at that — but the good kind of foreign, who speaks English as a first language and comes from a rich and successful family). If Foreman acted like Chase — like he didn't give a shit about his career, like he was just working for House for the hell of it — it would look different. It would feel different. Foreman is a perfectionist and has an inferiority complex because his whole life the world has told him he's not as good, he's doomed to "turn out" bad, he won't and can't amount to anything because of who he is. Cameron is assertive and ambitious and gets really touchy when people underestimate or overlook her, because she's sensitive and kind and weak (Foreman himself tells Cameron he thinks she needs to "toughen up"), and so she also constantly has to prove herself, and that she can be a Good Doctor And Leader while still being compassionate and soft. Again, Chase doesn't have to worry about any of this. He can be unambitious and easy-going about his career, because it doesn't really matter to him in the same way. He doesn't have to be the best student or get the best marks and have the best record. He has very little to prove.

And in a way, Chase is in the same kind of perception trap as the others. Not to suggest he has it soooo much worse than Foreman, but because he's a Rich Good Looking Dude, you kind of expect him to be a nepobaby. You kind of expect him to be useless and underqualified and shallow. To coast on his looks and to not have brains and have no idea how to manage in the Real World. It's definitely how Foreman sees Chase — he says as much, and lowkey hates him for it, and fair enough — but again what's interesting to me is where it isn't quite true. Chase is brilliant, when he cares enough to try. His apathy is learned, not born from an easy life; he comes off as cool and easy-going but holds grudges and resentments and trauma about two inches down. He's afraid of rejection and trying and failing, and so stays in his comfort zones. But where Foreman spends all his time and energy trying to prove the entire world wrong, to fight every automatic perception of who he is as a person, Chase leans in to his own facade. I actually think that S8 Foreman is a pretty happy person. I think S8 Chase, Chase MD in House's office, is at least 70% miserable.

[voidedaurora]

Now just to preface before her fans go crazy at me, I don't have a account in her server and I'm not specifically telling anyone to go out of their way to send me these things (aswell I do just get sent stuff in asks so there's that) DO NOT HARASS ANYONE MENTIONED/SHOWN IN SCREENSHOTS, I DO NOT CONDONE ANY AGRESSIVE, SPITEFUL, HATEFUL, OR OTHERWISE MALICIOUS BEHAVIOR!

Edit: I actually forgot to include a rlly important screenshot (her announcement about all of this)

Alot of her fans groveled at her knees after this announcement despite it basically being "yea I might make sexual jokes but sorry YOU interpreted it that way" She doesn't actually take any accountability in this? "I genuinely did not mean for any of it to be deemed as grooming" that's not even denying its grooming or apologizing for anything, it's literally just saying "I didn't want you to think about it like that" Aswell with the last part I have underlined, what evidence? how are you going to disprove you're grooming khai after everything stacked up, your current visible actions will always speak louder than your words in a screenshot with something like this. Honestly do better mel, cut this shit out, and stop being weird with people significantly younger, and set BOUNDARIES. [you can have a best friend without being sexual around them, foreign concept I know!] Whether you like it or not you're growing up, you're not a little kid just making animation memes anymore, you're nearly 19 years old and need to wake up and be responsible about this and own up to what you've done instead of your ego getting to you. Not to mention you havent addressed literally any of the other things you've been called out for because you genuinely do not care apparently.

Altogether, bad response you didn't take any accountability and blamed everyone else for "seeing it that way". end of edit:

Anyway I wanted to touch on part of the convos that've been going on in her server and clear up (once again) my side on why this is an issue since people in her server seem to exist on a different dimensional plane, ignoring everything I've said only to make up their own incorrect interpretations of my feelings/why I've done what I have here on tumblr. The SS i'll be speaking on first:

I'd like to state again for the record that while the fact she's 15 in a 16+ server is an issue (especially because its out of special treatment) It's not the main problem at hand here. The main problem with her being let in is the fact Mel allowed her to LIE about her age to get in and the fact that apparently she was also going to make an exception for another 15 yr old to be in from what I've been told? Coupled with her other recent behaviors it makes it all the more concerning. With Khai specifically/s past [that being lying to get into adult spaces to erp, draw/exchange nsfw, and a whole lot of other unsavory/inappropriate things] which again, Mel was and is 100% aware of, It's not okay for her to be letting this behavior slide and even encouraging it at this point. Khai has been lying about her age for years now and the fact she's being enabled and allowed to continue said behaviors is just not okay period, she already gets away with it but it's teaching her she can continue to do that without consequence having mel make an exception specifically just for her.

It's all genuinely so weird and just eugh, I'm extremely disappointed to see mel giving such special treatment to a whole kid just because they're besties now, especially with how she used to feel about/talk about khai before she became a wide eyed fan that looked up to her, genuinely what is up with her befriending the most parasocial fans ever. Aswell, whether you're best friends or not you shouldn't be letting/encouraging a friends bad behavior, this goes for both mels and khais actions respectively, from what I can tell they just gas eachother up and let eachother do bad shit just because, obviously khai cant really do anything to stop mels bad behaviors since she's a kid and that's not her job, but its still worth mentioning. Mel NEEDS to set boundaries if she insists on being best friends with fans/people significantly younger than her, she needs to learn what is appropriate and what is not, It's not hard to act normal around younger friends. [Imo someone 18+ honestly shouldn't be having 15 yr old best friends but that's just a personal opinion and my own morals]

And just to mention once again, I'd appreciate if the people in her server wouldn't just blatantly talk shit about me and especially would stop theorizing and prying into my mental health/BPD. I absolutely do not appreciate my disorder being used to push the idea that I just want to bring her down, just because I'm hurt from her actions doesn't make me speaking out on her blatantly terrible behavior any less valid, I can be hurt and truthfully talk about everything that's gone on simultaneously despite what a lot of people seem to believe. You've all made it quite clear you do not care about victims and would rather use "well I was (blank) and-" statements to discredit everything I or anyone else have to say about this, aswell as the whole "this should've been private!" argument as if I didn't try to handle this privately. Just because you've had an experience that went a certain way doesn't mean you have any higher ground to speak on when its about SOMEONE ELSES situation, sure you have input to give yes, but using your own experience to bring down someone else just because the one in the wrong just happens to be your #1 idol animation meme youtuber is disgusting and really makes where your priorities are at clear. Obviously everyone will believe what they're gonna believe, mels always gonna have her parasocial yesmen and there's nothing I can do to change their minds. Though I'd like so say, what has mel done to disprove any of this? Has she provided any evidence, has she given any meaningful statements?, has she properly addressed anything? the answer is no unsurprisingly. Take what she's said (or the lack of what she's said) into consideration before throwing yourself at anyone to defend her. And Fyi, Her essentially saying "nuh uh I'm not grooming anyone and I know I shouldn't be weird around friends but its a joke lol!" doesn't actually disprove anything, her actions have spoken way louder than her words ever have/will Here's a few notable screenshots/my takes on em bc auhh some of these are worded pretty rudely but I'd like to be transparent and honest.

[I originally did not censor names but I've decided to because I don't wasn't anyone getting ideas and harassing people]

Also just to add on a bit, I really hope this doesn't actually happen because why is a whole adult having a 15-16 yr old fly out to see her, and a better question would be why would her guardians allow that??

I don't think I have the full screenshot of this but reminder that mel actually was the one who refused to communicate like ever? I'd tried really hard to get mel to talk to me so we could have a private conversation about everything (her admitting to only sleeping with clover to be with me + a handful of other things) but she avoids talking things out like the plague, I gave her around 3 months before saying ANYTHING and there wasn't a single word until she'd got her friend to come up to me, only to refuse talking unless it was in a group which I absolutely was not comfortable doing (why would I ever feel comfortable having that conversation about sexual shit + personal stuff with other people around, let alone the same people who'd lied to cover for her before along with other things??) I'd like to note that I still don't have her blocked on anything so there's never been anything stopping her from reaching out other than her own ego/thoughts. same person sadly, they've got some interesting takes to say the least

Just because someone says "I'm not being groomed" or says they aren't a victim doesn't mean they actually aren't a victim, Its extremely common for a victim to be unaware they are one or even go as far as defending the abuser. I myself even struggle seeing myself as a victim sometimes and need alot of reminders (my input isn't too important but I thought I'd mention that </3)

Also khai, Idk what chronically online wording this is but I do not care about your "vrchat culture", cuddling and all that with someone significantly younger than you is weird regardless, does that "culture" also include being weird with minors in the handbook or is that just something mels added on? /gen

With this, you can be a victim and a bad person khai, in my opinion you are both. I can wish you well in one situation and not like you because of another, just because you've done terrible shit doesn't mean I want terrible shit to happen to you

Not much to say other than a 15 yr old shouldn't be "sleeping in the same bed" as an adult, let alone CUDDLING??

All I have to say with this is that yes! you are a child khai and I'm not going to give you special treatment like mel does, I genuinely do wish the best for you and that you get out of this situation though, truly. And I'll share as much as NEEDED to prove what I've said because none of it is false [if ANYTHING, there could be misunderstandings, but none of what I've said is made up, bullshit because I'm "hurt", stuff just trying to make mel look bad, etc.] , I have nothing to hide unlike mel (who's proven/disproven nothing?) Reminder I wouldn't have had to share anything if she'd handled things in private like i'd tried to, but it's a little too late for that. Best thing she can do is admit her wrongs and make some sort of response HERSELF.

Additionally

Its the way she just doesn't care and is more focused on her animation memes and her birthday coming up, don't do bad things if you cant handle consequences, or just don't do terrible stuff period?

I'll state again DO NOT HARASS ANYONE MENTIONED/SHOWN IN SCREENSHOTS, I DO NOT CONDONE ANY AGRESSIVE, SPITEFUL, HATEFUL, OR OTHERWISE MALICIOUS BEHAVIOR! Sorry if this isn't worded correctly/comes off as aggressive at all, I definitely missed some stuff aswell but I don't want this post to be too crazy long (I am upset so it definitely shows through a bit, I apologize for that, my kindness with all of this has been stretched pretty thin, especially knowing how much shit her fans are talkin about me simply because I spoke out </3)

[literary-illuminati]

2024 Book Review #39 – Inglorious Empire: What the British Did To India by Shashi Tharoor

I honestly forget who first recommended this book to me – quite possible I just googled ‘good indian history books’ and found it that way? - but it’s been on my TBR list for functionally forever at this point. Which meant I went into it essentially blind, with no memory of what if any details I’d been given with the recommendation. Which meant I had a moderately disappointing reading experience just because I was hoping for a narrative history and not an explicit polemical/persuasive text. Still, taken on its own merits as one of those, it’s really quite a good one.

The book is an adaptation and expansion of a performance the author gave at an Oxford debate (arguing against the notion that the British Empire was a good thing) which was recorded and went viral enough to make it a commercially viable prospect. The origin story shines through in the form – aside from an introduction and conclusion, each chapter is a clear and specific argument against some specific justification offered for the British conquest and colonization of India, full to bursting with statistics and quotations buttressing every point.

I would very much like to say that most of it is devoted to stuff the average reader will know anyway (if illustrated with clear and affecting examples), but, going by the apparent public response to the original debate and some polling cited in the conclusion, apparently not! The YouGov polls about the English public’s knowledge and opinion of the Empire are bleak enough that yeah this probably is a direly needed work of public education, if mostly for people who will not at any point read it.

Still, the fact that the British Raj was explicitly and institutionally racist and reserved functionally all positions of real power and authority for white men shouldn’t be much of a surprise, nor the fact that the ‘rule of law’ was basically a sick joke as far as crimes across the colour line went, nor the fact that the extraction of wealth from India to make fortunes in Britain was the explicit goal of policy, nor the fact that resistance (especially resistance successful enough to spook the authorities) was responded to with utter and excessive brutality. All that is basically the meat of what having been a colony means.

That said, I was taken a bit aback by the sheer rapaciousness of early Company government – it’s one thing to hear about oppressive taxation, another to get quoted the census figures of how they were so extreme that enough peasants fleeing their land and homes to look for greener pastures to show up as overall population decline in the areas under HEIC control. Similarly, my understanding of how India was turned into a captive market for British goods was much more subtle and indirect than the outright smashing of looms and legal prohibition of any attempts to compete with British industries that were actually used.

Whereas I did know about the deadly famines that kept occurring throughout the Raj, but the sheer cartoonish malevolence of colonial authorities when faced with them always manages to shock me a bit. ‘Nature’s solution to overpopulation’ was a really horrifyingly opinion at the time.

The audience of the debate performance the book’s based on definitely shines through in the choice of sources – wherever possible, Tharoor quotes from or cites western (Anglo-American, generally) sources for his eye-witness accounts and always takes care to introduce and ground them in terms of western governments or academia. The quotes themselves are all helpful illustrations, though there’s probably slightly more than are really strictly necessary – I’m pretty sure by wordcount at least a chapter of the book was actually written by Will Durant.

I’m not sure if it’s because of the original format or just how Tharoor writes, but the book also just has a great love of adjectives. Seemingly every source referenced is ‘historic’ or ‘path-breaking’ unless it is merely ‘compendious’ or outright ‘invidious’. Not a bad thing, but once I noticed it I was totally unable to stop doing so.

The book is straightforward polemic and Tharoor makes no bones about his position, so I take his verging-on-idyllic descriptions of pre-colonial Indian governance (especially regarding land tenure and caste) and the probability that India would have unified into a modern nation state without colonialism a dose pour of salt. There’s a few other inaccuracies I noticed (referring to the East India Company’s theft of Chinese tea plans as the ‘birth of agricultural espionage), for example), but it was all in the realm of little asides or colourful anecdotes rather than anything load-bearing.

It is rather funny that the book repeatedly draws comparisons with French colonies to argue that India was worst off, on the grounds that Paris at least made gestures towards integrating Indochina or Algeria and their peoples into France (however inadequate and hypocritical those efforts were), whereas in India the maintenance of total domination and the clear policy that India and Indians were things to be exploited for the benefit of England never changed. Funny, because from the book of Vietnamese history I read a few months ago the perspective of nationalists in Indochina was quite the reverse, seeing the English as at least somewhat honest brokers who were willing to grant some level of (limited and inadequate) self-government, compared to the French. Grass is always greener, I guess.

Though that does get at Tharoor’s argument as to why the British were worse not just in degree but in kind to the Mughals and any other empire-builders from outside South Asia who had come before them. The Mughals became Indian, both in the simple material sense that all their taxes didn’t end up back in Samarkand and Indian merchants were intentionally ruined for the benefit of traditional central asia trade routes, and in the more cultural sense that the ruling class set down roots and intermarried with their subjects rather than establishing a cloistered ruling class. Instead, the Raj was more akin to Tamerlane’s sack of Delhi, extended across 200 years. (One gets the sense Tharoor thinks a permanent settler population moving into stolen palaces would have been preferable to the rotation of soldiers and officials arriving from the metropole for long enough to get rich before heading back to build mansions in the Home Counties.)

Also, speaking of Vietnamese history, I only have a sample size of two but it’s interesting how in both cases a class of liberal (in the western sense) intellectuals and bourgeois emerged who tried to take the colonial propaganda at its word and enter some sustainable partnership with the imperial power – and in both cases got at best ignored and at worst imprisoned, tortured and executed for their trouble.

Anyways, interesting read, if one that makes me want something more specific and rigorous about basically any specific section of it (though, not to jump up and yell ‘Canada Mentioned!’ but every time Trudeau was used as an example of a colonial power’s leader handling the apologizing and acknowledging stuff gracefully and well I had to really try not to laugh).