what if i gave rise leo BPD...
his anger manifests in the form of self-sabotage and self harm. he asks donnie to sound proof his room when they get to the new lair so he can wreck it without concerning everyone else. before that he'd sneak to the surface and wreck an already messy alleyway
his self harm is recklessness. he gets hurt in fights as much as he can and still get away with just a "please be more careful" lecture from raph
speaking of raph, his oldest brother is his favorite person. so when raph starts to brush him to the side and distrust him, he doesnt take it well. when he does something to impress raph and all he gets is "finally..." thats when he disappears for hours and comes back home with sore arms and usually some scrapes and many bruises
he becomes a medic because they can't ignore him if he helps them. plus he can get better at hiding his breakdowns if he can take care of his own injuries
he wants to be in the spotlight so bad until the spotlight shines on him and suddenly his skin fits wrong
splinter and raph brush it off as teenage hormones. donnie shuts it out. mikey is the first person to realize leo's moods aren't normal, but he doesnt want to confront the fact the bpd comes from trauma, so he tries to support leo as best he can
april doesnt realize how much leo's mood shifts until she spends a night in the lair and realizes that leo isn't as hyper as he presents himself. he tries to mask, but he's too tired and the sudden silence from leo throws april off. it creates a rift between them. even when leo is happier around april, she knows somethings wrong- knows its not quite as genuine as she thought.
she spends more time around donnie than leo and leo thinks its for the best. eventually all his brothers- all his family prefer spending time with someone thats not him. he tells himself its for the better- the less time they spend around him, the less likely he'll be upset around them and end up making them upset
leo convinces himself he's meant to be alone and puts his all into being the team medic and spends the rest of his time alone and dissociating. he hates being the leader- having everyones eyes on him all the time. watching him. waiting for him to mess up- to act out- to prove they were right not to trust him
.... idk.. just a thought
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“Can't remember when we walked past the O.R. sign!
(sur-ger-y!)
Can't remember passing out with her hand in mine!
(my-my-mind!!!!)
I remember waking up with my mind repaired.
(A-OK! ^^)
I remember when I realized, she wasn't there...”
Amnesia was her name….. is. so. horrifically. sadly fitting for these two in literally every single line. And I’m gonna NEED ALL OF U GUYS TO GO LISTEN TO IT NOW OK… THIS ISNT A DRILL GO GO GO GO!!!
Anyway… uhh. the fact Betty “blessed” this guy to like. An eternally long lifespan w THIS FUCKED UP OF A MENTAL STATE IS SO SCREWED UP GHGH- Like poor Simon god damn…! u kno he’d rather just keep on not sorting out his baggage and trauma forever too cuz it’d be too complicated… too much… force him to admit things about himself and about BETTY that he really really doesn’t want to… better to just leave it all unexamined.. pack it all into lil boxes so he can just try to ignore it and pretend it doesn’t exist… HE GOTTA LIVE FOREVER W IT THO… *ME BANGING ON SIMONS DOOR AT 3 IN THE MORNING*: “SIMON U GOTTA ACCEPT URSELF!!!! LOVE URSELF!!!! ACKNOWLEDGE N ACCEPT EVEN THE “BAD” PARTS OF URSELF!!!! SIMON PLEASE!!!!! SIMON EVEN PPL WHO LOVE YOU AND WHO YOU LOVE CAN HURT YOU!!!! ACKNOWLEDGE IT!!! ACKNOWLEDGE THE HURT AND ACKNOWLEDGE UR FEELINGS!!!! AND URSELF!!!!! SIMON!!!!” anyway… gGHGH YEA, SRRY. SIMON PETRIKOVS MENTAL ILLNESSES MAKE ME FEEL LIKE IM GONNA EXPLODE. ANYWAY HAVE SOME ART. W a bunch of diff versions cuz I’m indecisive!
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SPAMTON ASKBOX RULE/INFO POST IS LINKED HERE!!!
Please read before you interact with spamton!!!!
[YGM!] is made without a plot, so you get to hang around with Spam and keep him company during whatever daily activities he does :-3!!! Your actions and your words can have great affect on Spamton,, so i encourage thinking about your words and how they may come across!! Or dont!! See how he'll react idrc lol.
[YGM!] has no foreseeable end so stick around or something i guess!!!
If youre new to the horde, you may need to scroll through the tag and gather some context :-)!!! Otherwise have fun!!!
"meet the artist" is outdated,, ill redo it eventually lol, but for now;
HI!!!! Im Buwheal,, but you can call me Bu :-)
if it wasnt super blaringly obvious, Spamton is my favorite character!!!! I hate him <3
Mutuals feel free to dm me whenever you want!!!! I love talking to people (Especially about Spam..... HE IS ALWAYS ON MY MIND....) and i love listening just as much!!!!
Sorry mutuals if i dont interact much, i haven’t really been looking at my dash recently!!! It also takes a little bit of working up courage lol
Basic DNI criteria + Spamtis shippers. Not much to be said.
Btw sorry if you start getting old art on your feed after following me LOL some of it is wretched but i wont delete it :-P
List of my tags for navigation:
#BuwheArt <- art tag (doesnt usually include askbox stuff)
#[YGM!] questions <- [YGM!] info and questions ive answered. Curious? Head here!!
#[You've Got Mail!] <- Spamton askbox tag. New to the horde of insects that stick around to witness this? You should probably catch up!!!!!! Things get pretty wild so you /will/ need some context.
There might be art missing from the art tag so if youre curious just search the "Spamton" tag lmfao.
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pick a song for each letter of your URL, and then tag that many people
thanks for the tags forever ago @part-time-deranged and @elviehun i do notice <3
s - sugar by brockhampton
u - unfucktheworld by angel olsen
g - going to pasalacqua by green day
a - amity gardens by fountains of wayne
r - rose parade by elliott smith
h - hold the light by lp
i - i wanna be adored by the stone roses
l - love my way by the psychedelic furs
l - lua by bright eyes
p - plasticine by placebo
a - awful by hole
r - rhymes of an hour by mazzy star
k - kids in '99 by death cab for cutie
bold assumption that i'd know 13 of my followers who haven't already done it and actually wanna interact with me to tag and i won't do it but tagging @libraryspectre @beanie-twink @dearings from my recents and @gnome-cleric @pyrchance and @100percent-unimpressed my beloveds in case you wanna(/again).
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WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL!!! /POS. ATTACKING YOU.
Xemnas and Xigbar for 37 if that number hasn't been done? If it has, how about 74?
no puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal // ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti.
[ID: a mostly black and white drawing with a purple overlay of xigbar and xemnas shown from the hip up on the left side of the image. the background is black and has some diagonal lines with a bit of transparency on the right side. the shadows are harsh, with only a bit of light falling on their faces.
they stand before each other turned to the audience. xigbar, holds the handle and the middle of No Name before him, head tilted down as he looks to the audience. xemnas stands a full head taller behind xigbar, his left hand held some distance below the bladed tip of No Name, his left eye is covered by his fringe.
xemnas visible eye is painted ochre with a white pupil, while xigbar's eye is white and gold. The eyes on no name's handle and the gazing eye on the blade are a vibrant cyan. the caption reads the spanish lyrics "i can't ask a simple mortal for a forever" and "oh, everything i've done for you." /End ID.]
close-up under keep reading.
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