#my stroke

[j4m3s-b4k3r]

10 years a LEFTY

After my stroke at the end of 2012, my focus for most of 2013 was on learning how to walk & talk again, and navigating the bureaucracy of disability benefits. By September, I was still very much a mess, but finally wrestled with an issue that had weighed heavily on me the entire time - whether I’d ever draw again. 

Sketching in Golden Gate Park.

Janine Dawson had sent me a sketchbook while I was still in hospital, complete with pre-dated pages. I could not keep to her schedule though. Partly because I had so much physical therapy and became exhausted easily. Also, I was deeply afraid. My clumsy attempts to draw with either hand caused despair. So I focussed instead on the many other things I needed to do. There’d been hope that sensation & motor coordination might return to my right drawing hand eventually, but 9 months later it was still asleep (and in most respects, still is). I finally accepted that my trusty right hand was kaput, and wouldn't draw again. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but only after that acceptance could I train the understudy to go on stage - My LEFT HAND. 

A self-caricature in my wheelchair, 2013.

I drew for its own sake, with absolutely no expectation of ever drawing professionally again. That filled me with sadness, but the idea that I might not draw at all was worse. Drawing was always part of my self-identity. So, Julia & I often drew together. I was painfully slow, but started to enjoy the random quality of my drawings done with my non-dominant hand. Never exactly sure what my LEFT hand would do, I drew in a spirit of exploration, like when I was a child. (I now believe that this open lack of expectations actually set me free). My mobility was even worse than it is now and we often drew paused images from TV, but went location sketching too, starting at the college campus near our apartment.

Sketches of SF State campus, 2013.

Julia had bought me two beautiful leather bound sketchbooks for Christmas 2012 (and I had a stroke the very next day). 2014 was when my drawing had progressed enough to start filling one of them with sketches. I went out sketching with her, or sketchmaster Matt Jones. Unsure of how to earn a living, I often considered what other job I might do.. Be a writer? A teacher? Kevin Richardson helped me explore script writing. Steve Purcell & Derek Thompson called me for a few weeks of story brainstorming. It is hard to overstate how much those first short gigs meant to me. I began to feel useful again. In the first year of my stroke many friends (from many studios) had arranged fundraisers to help with my medical bills, but I was too frail to attend. In 2014, Ben Walker arranged “Bizarro Sketch Night”, where artist friends bid on each other's art, drawn with their non-dominant hands. A fun event that I was able to participate in myself. I'll never forget all these encouragements from my community.

"Bizarro Sketch Night", 2014.

John Hoffman gave me a sketchbook, and in 2015 it was where I began to sketch out a graphic novel. The plan is to incorporate old pages done with my RIGHT hand and new pages done with my LEFT, and for them to be compatible (this art-therapy project continues to this day). Julia encouraged me to start colouring my blog stories digitally (and for Christmas that year, she bought me a new cintiq!) Using Photoshop with one hand was tricky, but the workarounds I learned came in handy when I got my first ever LEFT-handed paid drawing assignment, a cover for Carol Hughes’ book!

2015 projects.

2016 had so many work opportunities that I was taken off disability. My financial safety net was gone, but it was exciting to take the plunge into freelancing as a LEFT handed artist. Again, friends gave me encouragement & chances. Steve Lee got me a brief teaching assignment (at the Academy Of Art). Then Jim Capobianco asked me to storyboard on "MARY POPPINS RETURNS". This was very exciting development for me. It was a long gig, subletting a room in one of the satellite buildings of PIXAR's Emeryville campus, where old colleagues were watching my progress..

"Mary Poppins Returns", 2016.

In 2017, I did LEFTY storyboards for Brad Rau at GHOSTBOT. Soon after,Jonas Rivera suggested I try out storyboarding on a PIXAR project, which became Pete Docter’s "SOUL", and after a few months, that became a staff position. It was wonderful to be working again with my old roomie Rej Bourdages, who’d always supported me in my darkest hours. Keeping up with all the other inspiring drawing geniuses in Emeryville is intimidating for a one-armed old duffer, but is a great way to improve. In 2018 & 2019 my drawing dexterity & speed increased (and with this steady job, I finally paid off my mountain of medical debt). The 2020-2022 pandemic years were ironically a boon. Working from home gave me extra hours (previously sucked-up by my commute) to do more spare time personal projects, where I pushed my LEFTY drawing skills even further.

"SOUL"

"the INVENTOR"

"ELiO"

Animated films worked on since 2017.

It’s been a decade since I began drawing with my non-dominant hand. Every day is still a struggle, but I'm so grateful to be where I am now. On this day in 2013, I had absolutely no hope that I'd ever become a full-time professional cartoonist again. That I actually got here is due to many colleagues, friends & loved ones not only encouraging me to draw, but giving me real professional opportunities to do so.

All throughout this topsy turvy journey, at every low & highpoint, Julia has never lost faith in me. Even though I became a feeble old man overnight, she stayed with me. She understands how important drawing is to me (as it is to her too) and she has always offered encouragement. She has gone out drawing with me. Challenged me, and pushed me to new levels. Her artistry is a constant inspiration. I'm extremely lucky to have her by my side.

I'm profoundly grateful to all of you, who've supported me in so many ways over the past 10 years. You've given me great joy.

Thank you!

[crispyliza]

Fanfiction in the late 2000s-early 2010s was wild bc you'd find a beautifully written story with the most compelling heart-wrenching plot you've ever seen and the author's note would be like:

Author with a username like ~SasukesWaifuxD~ : Ohayo gozaimasu! ↖(^▽^)↗, I'm sowwy it took me so long to update (๑•́_•̀๑)

tsundere twink from their fic : It was about damn time you idiot (눈‸눈)

~SasukesWaifuxD~ : Hey now! It's not my fault the plot bunnies kept wunning away fwom me (╥﹏╥)

tsundere twink: W-watever, it's not like I missed you or anything (💢,,>﹏<,,) b-baka!

[beybuniki]

beach episode

[comickergirl]

...I mean...technically...

[stygiovictoria]

i keep thinking about in book 2 when zuko was like horrifyingly happy after he got ovdr his fever and imagining if people saw him like that

[hinamie]

i'm on an itafushi kick and i am making it everyone else's problem

[bluegiragi]

human.

early access + nsfw on patreon

more backstory that i wrote up for patreon heh:

Simon and Tommy had a complicated relationship as brothers. 

At a young age, Simon basically wrote himself off as a lost cause, and did the best he could to make sure at least Tommy had a chance to be a functioning human being. After all, Tommy was the gentler brother, the dreamer, the one who looked like their mother (who'd walked out on them years ago to escape their father). But Tommy got bitter, got sick of the one always being protected, being babied. He lost respect for Simon, for the way he wouldn't fight back, and in a twisted way, grew closer to his father as a way to learn how to be powerful, strong. It backfired, and Tommy got wrapped up in some bad business.

Simon's kid brother died while he was deployed. He got the news in the letter, and it broke him in a big way. In the story timeline, it was years and years ago but it still hurts like hell whenever Simon thinks about him. 

[honeyhobbs]

Heat Stroke photoshoot but it's Gaz ☀️💦

[skialdi]

“We are siblings and we care for each other.”

[gl-saveme]

Lingling Kwong in Heat Stroke Makeup by homeless_makeupb

[spaceboy-art]

YAY BUTCH LESBIANS YAYYYYY

Everybody say thank you butches

[world-fire-entity]

IT'S ALL ONE GUY!??!?!?

I was just wondering who voices Kayne because I can't get enough of him, and I wanted more of him. So, I asked the Fandom Wiki...

"Harlan Guthrie", It said. "Neat", I said, ...But who voices Arther?

"Harlan Guthrie", It said.

...

WHAT? Well, Ok fine. YKnow what, Fair. Just a guy who has range, What a guy. Well then who voices john-

FU***IN HARLAN GUTHRIE

Kellan?

Harlan Guthrie

Trader? Oscar? Butcher? Wallace?

HARLAN "Arther stop whimpering" GUTHRIE

IVE BEEN CRYING OVER A GUY TALKING TO HIMSELF VOICED BY A GUY IN A RECORDING STUDIO TALKING TO HIMSELF!?!?!??

[beybuniki]

boys being boys

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Feelings Thawed

Character; Cater Diamond

Content; Fluff, gender-neutral reader, pining, ice skating (to various degrees of success)

Word Count; 650+

Author's Note; This is a present/thank you to my mutual @i-like-forgs. I hope you enjoy this ice skating scene with Cater, and that you get to skate soon!

As a reminder, do not put my work — or others for that matter — into AI as it steals. Link to Masterlist

The brisk wind bit at your nose, and you pulled up your scarf, trying to keep away the offending wind. Around you it was a winter wonderland, all made possible in the temperate conditions thanks to Cater, who was filming you skating around on the frozen pond’s surface.

“You know,” you hollered, making sure that you caught his attention, “you should join me! It’s fun!” You came to a stop by the pond’s edge, where Cater was standing with a large thermos.

Cater just shot you a wink, handing you the thermos. “This is for you though, silly!” 

He was deflecting, you could tell; behind that bright and cheery smile that he always seemed to wear around others, you knew when there was something off with Cater. You accepted the thermos though, and took a sip of the spicy apple cider, still piping hot.

You gave him a look and pulled lightly on his coat sleeve. “Yes, but it’s more fun with others, come on Cater!” You stepped back onto the ice, and slowly skated near him, waiting with an eager smile.

He looked at you, and then back at the ice, but he stayed standing in the light snow, shooting you that smile. “But I can’t take photos if I’m out there with you!” He scratched at the back of his neck.

Liar. “Cater,” you looped back around and stepped onto the bank, balancing on your skates, “do you not know how to skate?”

Cater’s smile turned sheepish, and his ‘ahahaha, looks like my gig is up’ chuckle made its appearance. He had been found out. “Never got the chance to,” he hid his face slightly in his scarf, either to keep the cold at bay or to hide that his cheeks were turning pink. “So I’d just slow ya down.”

You took his hand into yours, “Well, I could teach you if you wanted. Just a warning though, you’re gonna fall on your butt a lot, might get a few bruises.”

Cater looked down at your entwined hands. Mittens and gloves separated your skin from touching one another, but Cater could swear that he could feel the sensation nonetheless through the layers of fabric.

“You would? Even if I pull you down with me?” 

The last question wasn’t just about the ice skating; Cater didn’t want to force you to do anything that you didn’t want to… and that included being his friend. His heart seemed to whisper stronger emotions though, but he didn’t want to ruin what the two of you had.

You walked him out to the ice, and the both of you swiftly fell down on the ice, hard. But you just laughed and got right back up again, “Well, we did just fall. There isn’t anything scary about falling down; yes it stings and might leave a gnarly bruise, but in order to move forward we have to fall and get back up. So yes, is what I guess I’m saying.”

Cater looked up at you, the sun illuminating you and the snow glittered behind you. You were holding your hand out again, waiting for him. And Cater took your hand. 

It took him a while to get the hang of it, and he fell down quite a bit, but every time he fell down you helped him back up. And by the time that the sun was setting in the west, the both of you were cold, and both were going to wake up tomorrow with some bruises. It was fun though, which is all that mattered… but that whisper in Cater’s heart was by now singing, and maybe he would listen to it, but for now, he was happy with how the way things were, and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world, especially with how much you had smiled today. Your smile and knowing that you had fun with him was enough.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Tags; @eynnwwyjth, @ithseem, @krenenbaker, @silvers-numberonefan, @twistwonderlanddevotee, @xxoomiii

[alistairlowes]

i'm sorry but this shit annoys me to no end. like this is about heartstopper and you all need to stop acting like that show invented everything.

fucking anyways

1. Koisenu Futari

Show that’s specifically made to be about aromanticism and asexuality as well as how aroace people are perceived by society. They are main characters. That’s the main plot.

2. Heartbreak High

Want a teen show with ace rep? No problem. One of the main characters is ace! Would you look at that! The representation already exists! It's got a ton of other rep too and it's on Netflix but somehow we never got that ace rep yet right? You don't even need subtitles for this one.

3. SkamFr (s12)

Is it a bit too much at times? Ye sure but you know what it also is? Another teen show where the main character is asexual that deals with asexuality as the main theme. And no you don't need to watch all those seasons before to get it.

4. Bojack Horseman

I didn't even watch this one but I'm aware.

5. Cherry Magic

Oh would you look at that a show with main mlm couple where one of the side characters is aroace? I mean surely it hasn't been done before.

6. Run On

You want some casual side character ace rep? Well here you go even kdramas have done it but I guess there just aren't any shows...

Honorary mention to Sex Ed for that one scene.

[thesarcasticism]

what did he mean by this