#myself from actually running around the block. Which i didn't want to do because it would have been weird and also it was 3 am

[featherymainffins]

One thing about me is I don't understand why people say that you should never try even one cigarette because they all got addicted after one. I had the worst fucking nightmare experience with my first cigarette you couldn't pay me to smoke one of these again.

[bratzforchris]

Ways to Say "I Love You", C. Sturniolo

Summary: Five times you knew Chris better than himself, and the one time you didn't<3

Pairing: Chris x feminine reader

Warnings: Mentions of drinking/hangover (y'all i know he's techinally not of legal drinking age in the USA. this is fiction)

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N: I genuinely need this man in my life so bad actually. Anyways, enjoy some tooth rotting fluff. XOXO<3

1

“Bruh,” Chris groaned, leaning his head back against the couch cushions. “I feel like shit and I don’t even know why.”

You looked up from your phone, eyeing your boyfriend up and down. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” he whined, rolling off the couch dramatically. “My head hurts and I’m tired.”

You sat up from the gray couch, standing over Chris, who was sprawled on the floor, pouting and whining. You definitely felt bad for him, but at the same time, you knew Chris tended to over dramatize the smallest, most random things. “Do you have a fever?” 

Chris shook his head, rolling from his back to his stomach, but not getting off the floor. “I don’t feel sick, but I just feel like horse shit and I don’t know why.”

You observed him for a moment, before an idea dawned on you. Having ADHD, Chris tended to forget to eat and drink, so hyperfixated on something or too many thoughts in his head blocking the reminders to fuel his body. He was medicated for it, which both helped and hurt. Sometimes, he would be able to focus enough to remember his meals, but other times, the meds would dissipate his hunger cues. “When was the last time you had something to eat or drink?”

“Hmmm,” Chris’s blue eyes looked thoughtful for a moment before he shrugged. “Dunno. Which is weird because I’ve usually had like, six Pepsis by now, but we’re out and Matt didn’t go to the grocery store yesterday, so…I don’t know.”

You shook your head with a soft chuckle, helping your boyfriend up off the floor. “I think that might be the problem, sweetheart. Is there something you want to eat?”

“Do we have chicken nuggets?” Chris asked you, picking up one of the stim toys he had left on the floor last night as he followed you into the kitchen. “That reminds me, isn’t it weird that chickens can’t fly? Like…are they even real birds?” he asked you. 

“I dunno, hun. Google it.” You told him gently, pulling the bag of chicken nuggets out of the freezer.” 

“Do you think chickens are sad that they can’t fly? Like do they look at cardinals and go ‘Damn, why can he fly but not me’?” he hummed, flicking at the toy. 

Chris was wrapped up in his own little world as you made his lunch. He didn’t even get the chance to Google his chicken question before he was distracted by a Spotify notification, which led to him loudly singing a Lil Skies song, dancing around the kitchen. As much as you hated how difficult ADHD could be for him, Chris had one of the best personalities you had ever met; he was bubbly and outgoing, always the life of the party and always willing to cheer you up. You quickly plated his nuggets, along with some other random foods that you knew he would love, before sliding the plate across the island too. 

“See if that makes you feel better.” You explained with a soft smile. 

You watched as Chris downed the food, along with a Gatorade you had given him, only to see a smile dawn on his face. 

“I feel better now,” Chris mumbled shyly after a while. “Thank you. You’re the best girlfriend I could ever ask for. You literally always know me better than myself, it’s kinda weird.”

“Why is it weird?” You asked with a snort. 

“Cause it’s like you’re magical or something. Which it would be really cool if you were.”

You smiled, kissing Chris’s soft brown hair. “I love you too, hun.”

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

2

Tour life was difficult. No one would deny that. As much as the triplets were absolutely loving the Versus tour and all the antics they were getting to do, as well as meeting fans, they had to admit that it was exhausting. Not only were they running on an extremely tight schedule, it was wearing on Chris the most, simply because he was getting next to no alone time with you. It wasn’t that he simply wanted the alone time for sexual reasons, rather, you were the only person that could calm his mind, letting him just be. 

“Baby,” You hummed, softly stroking the brunette’s face. It was still dark out, just past six am, but you had a surprise for him, and you knew Chris would later complain about his sleeping in if he found the missed opportunity. “Wake up, honey.”

Chris wriggled beneath the blankets, sleepily blinking his blue eyes. He was freezing and it was dark out; way too early to be awake. “Too early.” he groaned in his morning voice, rolling over to face the wall with the blanket bunched around his shoulders. 

“I have a surprise for you.” You said, a bit more excitement in your voice as you shook him harder. 

The word ‘surprise’ immediately woke the boy up as he rolled to face you. You were already dressed in one of his hoodies and a pair of leggings, eager to get on with your plan. You were practically bouncing up and down like an excited little kid, hoping Chris would love what you had come up with as much as you did. 

“Why the fuck are you awake? It’s dark out,” he moaned. “Come cuddle me instead.”

You snorted at your boyfriend’s dramatics, quietly pulling back his blanket so as not to disturb Matt and Nick. “Get dressed, you big goof. We’re leaving in ten.”

As much as he wanted to argue and go back to sleep, Chris couldn’t deny that he wanted to understand what had caused the giddiness in your aura. He quickly pulled on his favorite hoodie and sweatpants, cramming his messy hair under a snapback as he followed you down the bus steps and out onto the quiet, dark sidewalk. He didn't know where the bus had stopped during the night. Philly maybe? But he didn’t get time to think about that as you simply nodded to one of the members of the triplets security and then took his hand, dragging him down the sidewalk. 

“Where are we going? I miss my blanket.” Chris pouted. 

“Me too,” You nodded, trying your hardest not to disclose the surprise. “But I do have something that’ll make you feel better.”

Chris didn’t know where you were going at this point, but he followed you anyway. He would’ve followed in any life, had someone asked him the question. You two continued to walk for a few more blocks until you stopped in front of a brightly lit diner, its neon signs illuminating the darkness of the street. 

“Pancakes?” Your boyfriend asked, perking up as the smell of bacon drifted from the restaurant. “Goddamn, I knew I made the right choice dating you.”

“I am pretty amazing,” You giggled, flipping your hair over your shoulder. “Let’s eat.”

You stepped into the diner together, immediately being sat at a booth and having your order taken. You and Chris both ordered an immense amount of breakfast food, quite tired of the protein shakes and cereal that came with bus life. 

“How did you, um, find this place?” Chris asked bashfully, stirring his straw around his Pepsi. 

You shrugged, taking a sip of your coffee. “I was just looking for things for us to do alone and it came up,” You hummed. “I love Matt and Nick, I really do, but I also like to have one-on-one time with you, and I could kind of tell you needed some, too.”

“How do you always manage to know exactly what I need when I need it?” he asked with a chuckle, brushing his hand over your knuckles. 

You smiled, a blush dotting your cheeks as your waitress came over with a tray full of all the food you had ordered. “I just do.”

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

3

“Baby,” Chris whined, sprawling out across your shared queen sized bed. “Don’t leave me. I don’t need food, nor do I want it.”

“But you do.” You said pointedly, looking him up and down as you slipped on your Uggs. 

“Nuh uh,” he fought back, smashing his face against a pillow. “You’re making me feel sick by not laying with me.”

“I’m not making you feel sick. Your choices are making you feel sick. No one told you to drink as much as you did.” You chastised gently, crossing the room to kiss his forehead. 

You and Chris, as well as his brothers, had gone out last night with a large group of friends, to include Johnnie and Jake, Tara, Larray, and Sam and Colby. Things had gotten a little…out of hand, leaving you with a very hungover Chris, who was making miserable noises as he clutched his stomach. 

“You’re not even laying with me,” Your boyfriend pouted. “My head and tummy hurt and I wanna be cuddled and you’re being mean.”

“You’re so grumpy when you’re hungover,” You snorted, kissing his forehead again. “I’ll be right back, babe.”

Chris whimpered again as you propped him up with several pillows, tucking him in and making sure he had water and a bucket nearby. You had opted to get him IHOP, figuring a good amount of carbs would ease the symptoms he was currently experiencing as a consequence of overindulging in alcohol. The time between you leaving the triplets house, picking up food, and returning home was less than forty five minutes total, but it felt like an eternity to your hungover boyfriend who simply wanted cuddles and for his headache and nausea to go away. 

You entered the bedroom, takeout bag in hand. “I’m back. Nothing to cure a hangover like a big, greasy breakfast,” You smiled, settling onto the bed and pulling out plastic containers of food. “Once you eat, you can take some ibuprofen for your headache.”

“I’m not hungry.” Chris whispered softly, feeling too unsettled to eat. 

“You know your tummy will feel better once you eat.” You cooed, stroking his stomach over the comforter. 

“Nuh uh.” he groaned, snuggling further into his pillow and blanket.  

“It will and you know it. You know you can’t drink that much, hun. I dunno what you expected to happen.” You explained softly, pushing some hair out of his face gently. 

As much as he wanted to continue to whine and be difficult, Chris had to admit you were right. A good breakfast and some sleep sounded really, really good right about now. He softly sat up, taking a sip of the Gatorade you had left on his bedside table last night. “Mkay…I’ll try to eat, I guess.”

You didn’t say much as you two began to eat your breakfast. You knew Chris probably had a raging hangover headache right about now, and you didn’t want to make it any worse. Once your boyfriend had had enough to eat and taken the pain relievers, he curled up into your side, placing your hand on his stomach. 

“...you were right,” he admitted quietly, always hating to be wrong. “Now I need belly rubs and sleep.” 

“So demanding,” You fake huffed, kissing his forehead. “Get some rest, hun. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ 

4

Chris Sturniolo was not the type to let anyone know he was upset. Sure, he would jokingly whine and complain about things when he felt like being irritating to his brothers, but he would never actually let anyone see when his feelings were hurt. You knew this about him, and after a little over a year together, you knew the signs that he was feeling this way as well.

The four of you were currently sitting in Matt’s car in a random parking lot, filming a car video. You opted to sit in the back and mostly listen with an amused look. After all, this was the triplets video, not yours. They hadn’t really planned a topic for today either, which ever bubbly Chris took to his advantage. 

“I need to pee,” he stated to no one in particular. “I got a new water bottle and so now I’ve been motivated to stay hydrated so I need to pee.”

“Why did you say water bottle like that?” Matt snorted. 

The boys continued back and forth with their bickering for a while, mostly making fun of the way Chris had said the word. You simply sat and laughed, enjoying all the weird conversations that came up, that is until Nick harshly interrupted Chris. 

“Do you ever shut up?” he asked. “Like genuinely, do you ever shut your mouth?”

“I do sometimes.” Chris protested. 

“Nuh uh,” Matt interjected. “You couldn’t go five minutes without talking. I bet on it. You’re one of those people on the list Nick was talking about. The one who could benefit from being quiet.”

“Fine. Time starts now.” Chris ‘locked’ his lips and pretended to throw away the key. 

You knew he was just going along with the video, but you could tell by the slump of your boyfriend’s shoulders and the way he had his forehead resting against the cool window that the comments had hurt him more than he let on. Nick and Matt continued to talk for a few minutes, before landing on a topic that immediately sparked Chris’s mind. He quickly decided to speak up, forgetting about their ‘challenge’. 

“You can’t do it,” Matt laughed, a triumphant look on his face. “Chris can’t stop yapping…wait, that should be the title of this video.”

Nick laughed and fist bumped his middle triplet, but you found the joke far from funny. Chris had slowly curled into himself throughout the duration of the video, speaking less and less. He was still appearing to be smiling and having a good time, but his overall demeanor had shifted, and you could tell his brothers’ teasing was getting to him. 

“We should get home. It’s getting late…” You mumbled softly once the car had quieted down. 

Chris turned around in his seat, giving you a thankful smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Matt nodded at your statement, turning the key in the ignition and beginning the short drive back to your shared LA home. Everyone was quiet, which was a rare occurrence in this car. You would’ve thought that Matt and Nick would’ve noticed Chris’s unusual silence, but somehow they didn’t. Your boyfriend lingered to get out as his brothers clomped inside the house, laughing about a random joke. 

“You okay, hun?” You asked, climbing from the backseat to the driver’s seat, resting your hand on his arm. 

“‘M fine.” Chris mumbled, leaning his head  against the window. 

“You don’t act very fine.” You whispered gently, running your fingers through the soft, brown curls at the nape of his neck. 

“Do you think I talk too much?” Chris whispered quietly, turning towards you. 

Under the bright light of the garage, you could see unshed tears welling in his lash line, threatening to spill. That’s how you knew Chris was upset. He almost never cried, unless he was really and truly upset. 

“Honey,” You said sadly, running your thumb across his cheek. “Of course not, bubba. I love listening to you talk.”

“Well Matt and Nick sure don’t.” he huffed grumpily, but a sniffle made its way out.

“Yeah…I was going to talk to them about that, actually. They were kinda being dickheads to you tonight.” You whispered, always hating conflict between the triplets. 

“They were right,” Chris groaned, burying his head in his hands. “I can’t shut my fucking mouth and everyone thinks it’s annoying!”

“Sweetheart,” You cooed, pulling him into a hug across the console. “I don’t, and I say that with every promise in me. I love listening to you talk, Chris. Your voice is the most beautiful sound I have ever heard and I learn so much from you every day.”

“Really?” he sniffled, a tear rolling down his cheek.

“Really, hun,” You smiled, softly brushing it away. “I love you.”

Chris smiled, giving you a soft peck on the lips. “You always just know, don’t you? You always know when I’m sick or tired or when something’s wrong. God, I love you.”

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ 

5

You had always loved music, ever since you were little. Something about how a simple arrangement of notes could make a person feel so many emotions captivated you. It was like a language that you didn't have to learn to understand. By the time you were eleven, you’d been playing guitar and ukulele, and that later expanded to piano and bass. Music was absolutely your therapy, and you took every opportunity you had to practice your craft. 

You were sitting on the floor of your and Chris’s shared bedroom, strumming softly on your acoustic guitar. For once, the house was quiet because the boys were out filming a video, so you took the time to practice one of the new songs you had been working on lately. Being a music major allowed you very little time for your separate projects, so you would take whatever chance you could get. 

The silence didn’t last long, though. Just as you were playing an Em chord, Chris burst into the room, flopping on the bed. “Hey mamas, how was your day?”

You playfully rolled your eyes, but continued to strum your guitar. “It was wonderful…until I was so rudely interrupted.”

“You know you love me,” Chris teased, rolling onto his stomach and propping his chin in his hands. “Play me a song.”

“God, you are so demanding,” You chuckled. “What’s next? An autograph?”

“Mhm. On my boobs.” Your boyfriend smiled.

You shook your head with a laugh, throwing a guitar pick at him. “You’re insane.”

You didn’t waste any more in Chris’s antics, though. You fulfilled your boyfriend’s request, quietly beginning to play Falling like the Stars and singing along. Chris said nothing more, cherishing the sound of your voice. He loved hearing you sing and play guitar. It soothed him, allowing him to see the passionate parts of you that only came out in your music. He wished that he could do the things that you did, but he had just never taken the time to learn an instrument. 

You looked up at your boyfriend on the bed after you finished the song, smiling softly. You watched Chris for a moment, observing his body language and the way he was looking at you. “Do you…want to learn?” You asked him quietly, a blush dotting your cheeks.

“You’d teach me?” Chris’s cheeks and ears grew pink as he looked at you shyly. 

“I’d love to.” You nodded with a smile. 

Your boyfriend clambered off the bed, sitting down next to you on the rug. You softly began to explain the different parts of an acoustic guitar and how to hold it, before moving onto chords and strumming. Chris had always been a fast learner when he put effort in, and right now was no different. Within the hour, he was already playing slow, soft songs. The chords were still vibrating and it took him quite a while to change them, but it was a song nonetheless. 

“I’m not as good at it as you are.” he pouted after a moment, setting your guitar aside gently. 

“Well I have been playing for ten years, bub.” You chuckled gently, kissing his face. 

Chris wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into him and kissing you back deeply. He loved you with all his heart, and you taking the time out of your day to share your passions with him only made him love you more. As the kiss grew heavier, Chris fell back onto the floor, still holding you as he giggled. 

“I’ve always wanted to learn how to play guitar, you know that?” he asked, pecking your forehead. 

“I could tell.” You smiled. 

“You always can.”

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ 

+1

“It’s such a nice day out today.” You hummed, soaking in the sun as you laid on your towel. 

Chris fidgeted beside you anxiously, but made an acknowledgement towards you statement so as to ‘throw you off his scent’. He had been planning this surprise for months now and he was currently using every muscle in his body to keep his mouth shut so as not to spoil it.

You two were basking in the sun on the beach in Santa Barbara, towels laid out. You had noticed Chris had been unusually quiet all day, but didn’t really think much of it. The beach usually kept him in his own little world, too distracted by the roar of the ocean and the sand between his feet to notice anyone else. You both had always loved the beach, and moving to the LA area after living in Boston your whole life had been a welcomed change. You practically went to the beach every weekend, but today Chris had led you to a new spot he had found. It was rather secluded, but you loved it all the same. It made things more intimate between the two of you. 

“You’re quiet today,” You said after a while, rolling over and propping yourself up on your shoulder. You looked Chris over from head-to-toe, admiring the tiny features about him like the way his curls had grown more pronounced with the salt air and the birthmark on his back. “Beach getting you relaxed?”

“I, uh, yeah. You could say that,” Your boyfriend tried to smile sheepishly, looking you over. Your lavender bikini hugged you just right, making him even more nervous. If he fucked this up while you looked so gorgeous, he would never forgive himself. “Wanna take a walk?”

You smiled, sitting up quickly and beginning to gather your towel. “Sure!”

“No!” Chris said a bit too hastily. “I mean, you don’t need to bring your towel…I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“You can’t just leave your stuff on the beach, Chris.” You giggled. 

“It’s not like anyone’s gonna steal it. Just–trust me, please?” he asked, giving you those blue puppy eyes you could never resist. 

“I guess so,” you fake huffed, taking his hand in your own. “C’mon, let’s walk before the sun sets on us, silly.”

Chris smiled, taking your hand in his own and starting the trek down the beach. The ocean was calling him as you two strolled westward towards the sunset, but that would have to wait. At least until he had finished his plan. The silence between you was comfortable like always, but this time it thrummed with passionate energy. Chris was pretty sure you had no idea what he was  planning, but then again, you knew him like the back of your hand.

“This beach is so quiet. It’s nice when it’s just us,” You smiled. “How did you find this place?”

“Oh, y’know, doing what I do best. Poking around.” Your boyfriend laughed nervously as you came to a beautiful expanse of rock along the beach. 

You immediately ran towards the beauty, smiling up at the wonder of nature. “This is gorgeous.”

Chris took the opportunity of you having your back turned to feel in the pocket of his swim trunks for the tiny box that he had been hiding from you for over a month now. He would admit that he had definitely had a bit of a struggle keeping the secret from you, but it was worth it to see you now, on this gorgeous beach, looking even more beautiful than the view around you. The brunette turned his head to where Nick was hiding out of sight, holding his camera. As much as he wanted the two of you to be alone for this, he wanted the pictures infinitely more. He couldn’t wait to tell his kids about what would be the best day of his life one day, that is, if you said yes. 

He took a deep breath, pulling the box out of his pocket and then tapping you on the shoulder. “I have a question for you, ma.”

By the time you had turned around, Chris was on one knew, holding a tiny, velvet box that held a gorgeous, heart-shaped, diamond ring. “Oh my god…” You whispered, hand flying to your mouth as tears welled in your eyes.

“You are my best friend, baby. I’ve loved you ever since I saw you that day in ninth grade algebra class. Finding out you felt the same way about me was probably the best day of my life. You always listen to every crazy, stupid, and dumb idea I have and I love you for it. You know me better than I know myself. I love loving you; you are my first, last, and only love. Will you marry me, Y/N?”

“Oh my god, yes!” You squealed, throwing yourself into his arms as Chris slid the ring onto your finger.

Chris sniffled as he spun you around, hugging you tightly and kissing you. “This is why I’ve been acting weird today,” he chuckled and blushed. “I was worried you’d find out. You know literally everything.”

“Not everything,” You smiled, showing him the diamond. “You kept the secret so well. Who all knows?”

“Well,” Chris admitted shyly as Nick stepped out from his hiding spot. “Nick knows, obviously, because I needed his help capturing the moment. Matt knows too. Other than that, no one else.”

“You’re amazing, Chris,” You whispered, kissing him again. “I’ve wanted to marry you since I was fifteen years old, you know that?”

“I love you so much, ma. Always have and always will.” 

As Nick continued to snap photos of the two of you in front of the sunset on the beach, you couldn’t help but to feel your heart swell. You hadn’t known what was going on with Chris this time, but for once, you didn’t even mind. 

tags ♡: @aemrsy @jake-and-johnnies-slut @mattsfavwh3re @suyqa @chrissturnswife @mbsbaby @herxyz @mimi-luvzyu @mayhem-72 @faygo-frog @oobleoob @idek3000hi @runasvengence

note ♡: if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here <3

[songmingisthighs]

Wanbelyn

introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii

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ch. lxx - good girl

neurosurgeon!hongjoong × reader

buy me coffee ?

where love and peace is held, i never expected for this to happen. i planned and i planned, i expected, and i hoped, but it was never you. you held what i wanted hostage to make room for you, the thing that i needed but has no means of acceptance. deny me, live your best life.

At this point, you found yourself in somewhat of a choreographed dance with the father and son duo manoeuvring the child in question. Usually, you would have to move quickly between taking Kijoong's things out of the car and making sure that he wouldn't make a run for it, even going as far as installing a car seat, iPad holder, and small containers of cereal and snacks, effectively turning your car into a mom car. Now, you simply needed to focus on Kijoong because Hongjoong would instinctively take your bag and any of Kijoong's belongings with him. Then, the two of you would basically lock Kijoong's hands in each of yours and making sure that Kijoong wouldn't have any means of escaping or running away as your bodies would block his sides.

You both call it "inmate transfer" and others pointed out that it's actually called "the family hold". You both were confident that "inmate transfer" is correct.

"I think I stuffed myself stupid," Hongjoong huffed, taking a moment to readjust his pants before resuming the walk back to the elevator from his dedicated parking spot. You couldn't help but snicker in amusement at the way he was so comfortable with you, totally different from the person you first knew less than three months ago. "I told you not to get a second plate, Joong, this is all on you," you teased which caused Kijoong to chirp, "Yeah, Joong," he teased, sticking his tongue out at his dad. Hongjoong squinted his eyes at the two of you, "Hey, I finished my main course, I EARN that dessert. And you had some, (y/n), you can't talk shit about my decision," he huffed before crouching down to Kijoong's height, "And that's daddy to you, mister," he said, poking Kijoong's nose.

Teasingly, you raised an eyebrow at Hongjoong, "You asked me to spend my day off with you and Kijoong, I think I reserve the right to call you out for eating a plate of two waffles drenched in maple syrup and ice cream after finishing a whole ass pasta by yourself. And while we're on the subject, who eats carbonara at 10 am?" "Yeah, Joong, who?" Kijoong teased again, this time drawling to poke fun at his dad even more. "A hungry man using food as a reward for a week of hard work," he said in a mocking tone, causing you to raise an eyebrow, "So is this your way of telling me that I've done a good job?" you teased.

"Do you think you've done a good job?"

Suddenly there was a wave of seriousness over the two of you (Kijoong was blissfully unaware, of course, what with kicking pebbles around as he held onto your hands). You momentarily stop in your steps to look at Hongjoong, "What?" Hongjoong stopped in his tracks as well to look back at you, "Do you think you've done a good job so far? Are you satisfied? Are you happy working here?" Already had a feeling that the discussion was coming, you wasted no time in going straight to the point, "Is this about my employment ending?" Hongjoong was kind of glad that you brought it up first as he didn't really know how to say those exact words (In all honesty, Hongjoong didn't know how to say a lot of things to you but one conversation at a time). "Kind of, yeah," Hongjoong confirmed.

For a moment, you pursed your lips and resorted to continuing your walk to the elevator as Kijoong, still in his own world, tried to get you to kick the pebbles with him.

Feeling obligated to explain, Hongjoong opened his mouth again, "I should clarify, I'm not asking you because I'm reviewing your work or anything. In fact, I just want to know if you're happy which I think is the biggest factor in sticking with a job." You could tell that he was trying his best to not be confrontational and your lack of answer would soon make him cry. "Good because if that was your way of firing me after all that we have been through, I would be so pissed, I'd actually give Kijoong back his toy gun." Hearing his name and toy, Kijoong perked up and started jumping excitedly, "MY GUN!?" he exclaimed, hopeful but you immediately shot it down, patting his head with your free hand, "No sweetie, and please don't interrupt your daddy and I are talking."

Relieved, Hongjoong chuckled and shook his head, "At this point, it would make more sense if you leave in the middle of the night and move away to Antarctica or something. But I know you wouldn't," "Hey, I might," you pointed out, rolling your eyes, "Push my buttons enough times and I'll pull a disappearing act so fantastic, it would get Best Performance award at the Grammys or something." Hongjoong's eyes widened, thinking that you were serious, "What, you mean to tell me that you'd consider leaving us?" there was a slight panic in his voice that made you crack out rather loudly, "Oh my God, Joong, calm down! I was just joking! You know I love working with you and I'll be honest, I'm kind of attached to the cutie pies of apartment 801 so it would take a lot for me to not want to continue working with you," you said lightheartedly, pinching Kijoong's cheek affectionately.

It was only when you both stepped inside the elevator that Hongjoong realized what you just said. "Wait, did you just say 'cuties'? As in plural?" Confusedly, you raised an eyebrow at him, "Um, yeah? Why do you think I keep feeding you? You're basically Kijoong-sized XL and I love the boy to bits," this time, you couldn't help but scoop Kijoong into your arms and blew a raspberry on his cheek, making him giggle from the ticklish feeling. There was a mix of feelings that surged through Hongjoong's body and he couldn't pinpoint on the cause as the giddiness was so palpable he could taste it at the tip of his tongue. The sheer feeling rendered him speechless and he could only find his voice when the elevator door opened and the three of you stepped out.

"So... You love me?"

In all fairness, Hongjoong meant that as a joke. Or so he said. He so totally doesn't lowkey hope that you'd say yes. But he was totally expecting you to roll your eyes and call him stupid.

The last thing he expected was for you to step closer to him, nudge his hip with yours and grin, "What do you think, Joong? What do your own feelings tell you?"

A sudden wave of excitement-induced nausea washed over Hongjoong, his body forcing his brain to prepare to have the talk. The one talk he knew he had to have with you considering the revelation he made (through Seonghwa pointing it out but he was not about to give his friend the credit).

You saw that his brain was trying to connect the dots and it was entertaining, to say the least. But at that moment, it dawned on you that you had just opened the door to a conversation you had only planned to have but even that plan was not solid. So to feign being coy, you took quick steps to get to Hongjoong's apartment first. "Hey!" Hongjoong exclaimed when he realized that you had taken off on him and he followed suit. While the distance from the elevator to this unit was not long, he caught up with you quick but it was because you had stopped in your tracks in the middle of the hallway, eyes trailed forward which caused him to look in the same direction.

It was like seeing a ghost. Well, a ghost from his past. Because out of all the moments in the timeline of his life, he would never have expected to see the person he was seeing. Not after what happened in the past.

"Minhee?" he called out.

Minhee, his ex, pushed her body off of the door and smiled gently, eyes looking over to Hongjoong before it settled on you and then on the boy who looked at her confusedly, not knowing who she was but he was intuitive enough to sense that there was something going on. You took notice of this when Kijoong suddenly turned around and clung on your body, refusing to look at his birth mother.

You, on the other hand, couldn't help but stare at her. She looked like the pictures you had caught glimpses of when you were cleaning but... Happier. She looked pretty and well-kept, exactly like how a young lady from a respected family should what with her all-white get-up and expensive bag. The nasty side of your brain immediately made comparisons and you came to the conclusion that you and her were vastly different and though momentarily, the thought of her being the kind of person that made Hongjoong commit flashed, leaving a nasty remnant that felt itchy.

"Well, aren't you going to let an old friend in?" she smiled.

Hell, even her voice sounded nice.

How were you going to fare?

network:

@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet

taglist :

@strawberry-yeo @luvt0kki @allisonleannn @dinossaurz @khjcs @blackb3ll @aloverga @at1nys-blog @itsbeeble @potatomountain @axo-l0tl @green-thots @intancollins @galaxypox @11glitch11 @maddiebabyxoxo @alyssajavenss @mirror-juliet @gxlden-bxbyy @charreddonuts @dreamlesswonder86 @mayonnaisehoeshit @kodzukein @teenyfinds @dear-dreamie @mitchloveswriting @soobiverse @satsuri3su @phenomenalgirl9 @guess-monst3r @dimeb29 @ka-ni-ma @yayaistime @angelicyeo @kyume02 @thedistractedwriter @surveilenceysystem @ateezourstars @aursmrt @mismatchfluffysocks @puppyminnnie @nycol-ie @yungilia @writingbarnes @worcesheshestershiresauce

[silenzahra]

They keep saving my life ✨

Dear friends, I've been missing today because I've been trying to recover from last night's experience! I went to watch my favorite band live again and I'm not exaggerating when I say they saved my life once more 🥹 It's just what I needed to feel entirely good again! My beloved Estopa never fail to make me feel better, them and the Mario Brothers are literally keeping me ALIVE these last years and I'm seriously so blessed 😭

I'm not gonna repeat everything I said here as the repertory was essentially the same, but I do want to add a video and some pics, and also a VERY silly conversation they had (as well as something related to my writing). So keep reading if you're curious, and it's totally fine if you're not! 🥰

Still, I believe perhaps @bberetd @vulpixfairy1985 @stripetkattelalala54-gf @itsavee4117 would like this! Of course, if you're not interested, just let me know and I'll remove your tag! 💖

THE FOREHEAD TOUCH AT THE END. THE WAY THE CROWD STARTS SCREAMING WHEN THEY DO IT. People do LOVE seeing them doing it, me included of course, and I can only melt and CRY 😭 (Yes, you can hear me singing and screaming, I recorded this video myself, so surprise! Voice reveal 😂)

And the line they were singing face to face right before bringing their foreheads together...

"And I'm still here by your side until the wind blows me away."

... I'm not crying, I just got some brotherly love in my eye 🥲🥲🥲

Also, a few minutes ago I just ran into this pic, a close-up of THE moment, and I DIED again 👇

THEIR FACES. THEIR FOREHEADS. I CAN'T. These brothers are gonna be the DEATH of me I swear 😭😭😭

The fact that they're REAL. I just can't get over it. Mario and Luigi have a WONDERFUL bond and you all know I love them wholeheartedly, but the fact that Estopa are the real, actual personification of brotherly love? In our world?? Them having so much fun together and always showing how much they LOVE each other in every single concert???

Excuse me if I CRY but they're too PRECIOUS.

I just can't have enough of them. As you all know, they inspired me to write my musicians post, and also two of my WIPs that revolve around different things (the brothers on stage and Luaisy smut). They inspire me. They've been doing so ever since I became a fan of them, which, btw, happened exactly 18 years ago today! Man, I'm old 🥲

And the thing is... If you've been following me lately, you know I've been going through some hard times and I've been feeling down for a long time. So much so that I was unable to read... nor write. I'm still in the process of getting over my reader's block...

... but my writer's one might be coming to an end at last.

It's too soon to speak yet, but Estopa's music does inspire me, as well as their brotherly dynamic and their chemistry on stage. And yesterday, a few things happened that only gave me more and more ideas for that future story I wanna write with Mario and Luigi being musicians and performing together.

First of all, a very silly conversation:

"I am your brother." "Yes, me too." "... No." "Yes, I am your brother." "I am your brother, but you're my brother. I'm not my brother." "Of course, because I am your brother. You're my brother." "No, I'm not my brother, I'm your brother!"

I swear, me and my friend were just cracking up at the stupidest conversation EVER 😂 You can't tell me this isn't Mario and Luigi 🤭😂

Unfortunately... there were a couple of times where David almost fell off the stage 😅 The first time, I didn't even notice because I was further back, but I was a bit confused that he was standing still at one end of the stage when he's usually running and dancing here and there while singing.

And then... I saw this. Unfortunately it's an Instagram story which means it'll be gone at some point, but even though I've tried, Tumblr just wouldn't let me add a second video to this post 🤦‍♀️ So I just hope you can get to see it before it's gone, but it's basically poor David tripping and being about to fall off the stage 🥲

Poor man, I swear I feel SO BAD for him 😭😭😭 All I wanna do is run and help him through the screen! Thank God he handled it and didn't hurt himself but I swear I SCREAMED when I saw this 🥺

On a brighter note though... the second time was hilarious and he didn't hurt himself 🤭 To give you some context, it turns out there was a famous artist among the crowd watching the concert. His name is Dani Martín and he's friends with Estopa. They actually sang one of Estopa's songs together a while back, and when they started playing it last night, David suddenly noticed his friend...

... And he jumped off the stage to go sing with him! 😂😂😂

The moment his butt literally kisses the ground, I'm so DEAD I swear 😂😂😂 You just CAN'T convince me Mario wouldn't do something like this if he spotted, I don't know, Geno, maybe? 🤭

They're so friendly I swear! This was such a big surprise, and my friend was elated because she's also a big fan of Dani Martín! So it was really so great they did something like this 🥹 David jumping to bring him on stage and Jose ceding him his mic, they're just so nice and pure 😭

Anyways, as I said, the rest was very similar to the concert in Sevilla I attended back in June (only that this time I was WAY closer and I couldn't believe it 🤩), so I'll just add that I've been sharing some videos of the concert on my Instagram stories, and I'll probably share a few more tomorrow as I recorded a lot 🤭

Also, my friend sent me the videos she recorded and her phone has such a higher quality than mine! So yeah, those are coming to my insta stories tomorrow too 😂 Just in case you'd like to see said videos, here's my Instagram account! I'm saving them all on the higlighted stories called "Estopa Chiclana" btw, so they're gonna remain there no matter what 🥰

And to say goodbye, here's an AMAZING pic my friend took at the beginning of the concert and that has become my new lockscreen! 😁🔥

It captures their essence SO WELL and it gives me so many ideas for Mario and Luigi! 🥹❤️💚

[thatonepersonwhocantwrite]

Wonderland pt 1

Part 1 (Eventually) Yandere Luke castellan x Gender neutral reader

Summary you're from wonderland well at least you're mother is you're father is a God. The best swordsman in camp takes an.... interesting and obsessive liking to you

Also I feel like we offen forget wine isn't the only thing Dionysus is the God of but madness as well. I currently have bad writers block and couldn't currently think of anything else to add so I decided to split it into parts since I needed to post something.

Trigger warnings nothing yet, but eventually in future parts yandere themes like stalking, manipulation, kidnapping (extra)

You weren't from this world well......technically you are you were from a part of the world everyone thought was made up just another part of the human imagination......Wonderland . Wonderland was very.....disconnected from actual sane people or large bustling cities like New York. Your mother was probably one of the subjects of the queen of hearts just kinda surviving. Your father isn't exactly normal either he was also never around. Honestly as much as you love your mother it was kinda hard to imagine a God falling for her or really a God falling for anyone in Wonderland because while some of the inhabitants of Wonderland is more sane then others even the more sane ones start to go insane eventually.

Which is why when you were 13 you ran away from home. Although you had no clue where to go or what to do now you had left Wonderland. You're clothes and mismatched socks probably also made you stand out to by standers because in real life on Earth the other humans weren't used to seeing people dress in bright colors and patterns unless celebrating. After a few days of wandering aimlessly you ran into help or rather help ran into you.

You were desperately scrounging around for food thinking maybe it wasn't such a good idea to leave home when you felt someone run smack into you causing you both to tumble towards the ground. "Oh my pan! I'm so sorry." A male voice said. He had ...goat horns? Ehh not the weirdest thing you've ever seen. "Are those horns really or .....?" You asked. "They're real. Oh I'm Grover. " Grover replied. You weren't sure what to say or do and that's how you met Grover. After about a week of traveling with Grover is when you met Luke, Thalia and Annabeth.

" Hey Grover I'm going to find something to eat for myself. " You replied. " Ok just don't go far I'll finish setting up camp." Grover said. You did in fact wander to far when you stumbled upon a bush full of berries and you were about to eat some when you heard a voice tell you to wait. "Wait, don't eat those! those are holly berries they are poisonous!" A young female voice exclaimed. You looked around for the source of the voice. You spotted a young girl no older than 7 standing between some trees you could make out 2 more figures behind her one another female and the other male. You backed away your left hand reaching for a dagger in your pocket you swear wasn't there a moment ago while you're right hand still held the berries.

" Who are you why should I trust you?" You questioned. You got a closer look at them the seven year old girl had grey eyes , black hair and brown skin, the other gir who looked about a year younger than you so 12 had choppy short black hair , blue eyes and is white. She pushed the younger seven year old behind her. " Thalia I can protect myself!" The seven year old exclaimed. While the two girls were arguing you managed to sneak away not noticing the male following you.

" Grover!" You exclaimed finally making it back to the very stressed looking satyr. Grover rushed over to you. " Y/n there you are! You were gone for an hour I was worried I was calling your name but no reply and I didn't want to leave the fire unattended. Your not hurt are you?" Grover asked like a panicked father looking over you to make sure you didn't have any new injuries. " Hey Grover I'm ok. I'm ok." You replied. " Pan Y/n you had me so worried!" Grover exclaimed. "LUKE!" The older female voice Thalia called out causing You and Grover to look in the direction of Thalia's voice and there stood the male that had been with the 2 younger females.

Now learning his name is Luke. You started to reach for your dagger once again.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. "

[justanothersyscourse]

I think this blog is blocked by fewer people that have heard the rumors and lies going around. I hope you'll read this. There are three sides to every story-- yours, theirs, and the truth.

I deserve to get my side out there so people can make informed decisions about who to follow or block, or whatever it is you need to do. It's okay not to support me, but do it for the right reasons.

I also run sysmedsaresexist, and I'm currently being accused of harassing a minor and sending random ass asks left, right and center.

Listen, if you got an ask where the person didn't say, "this is SAS," it's not from me. I HATE asks. On the rare occasion that I send them, I always tell people who I am. I am well aware that I'm a controversial figure. I want people to know who they're interacting with when I talk to them. I am old. It's important that I'm honest with the people I interact with. A lot of people really stepped up to support me, but I would like people to stop. Unfortunately, it's doing more harm than good.

With every one of these messages people send in support of me, the rumors get worse.

I want to defend myself, but I don't know how.

Send a vent to a vent blog that just actively lied about me? They won't post it. (They didn't, I just checked)

So I'll post it myself. You can make your own decision. All posts I've made on the topic are linked here (it's 5, compared to the DOZENS AEV has posted)

This will be my last post on the topic, and I hope that the people spreading these rumors will leave me alone. You've done more damage and harm to me than you know, and without any remorse or apology.

Ask sent to @anti-endo-haven :

I'm SAS and I'm so hurt.

I have not sent ANY anons to AEV, at all, at any point. I have not ASKED anyone to help me in this,

I made 5 posts. They have made about 50 at this point, all cruel.

The first was to AEV on their first post, which was NOT as rude as people say. I said, look webmd and mayo clinic isn't going to hold up to some of the articles that endos are throwing at us. Try some of these. I said, look, you're going to get really tired of hearing the same endo arguments. Here's some points you can throw back at them.

NOT TO MENTION THE MISINFORMATION IN THE POST. Dissociation is only trauma based? Incorrect. Maybe you should reconsider whether you're ready to be in these conversations.

That response was hidden.

The second post, I was correcting an endo that DID wasn't a trauma disorder. I tagged AEV and said, "see, you can be nice about corrections, and these are the kind of sources you should use."

I was blocked.

THIS IS WHEN I CHANGED LABELS. I was so disappointed in the community that I said fuck that, that's not what I want to be, I don't support this behavior. That's another person that AEV turned pro endo. Good job.

Then I saw the anon saying I was an endo. I used my other blog to POLITELY say, "This isn't true, please stop posting about me like this." This post is still on JAS, I didn't delete it like people are claiming

The fourth post was me making my own public post saying, "this child is throwing a tantrum over corrections. Now l'm pissed and I have to make my own public post so people don't believe those lies." This was the first rude post. I called AEV a blemish, and here's why.

I just made a MASSIVE post about dissociation that is actively being spread within the endo community now. All because I changed my label. I don't care if you all want to block me, but don't pretend that you're all doing anything to help by making bad resources for an audience that already believes the same stuff (all these new antis). Now all the new ones are spreading the same bad sources that don't hold up, and we all (yes, you, me, them, the next CDD system in line) look bad for it.

AEV couldn't provide a single source that said DID WAS trauma based, only "usually" trauma based. AEV actually made antis TURN PRO ENDO, because they used so many sources that said "usually". I offered him sources that said it WAS trauma based.

I'm not kidding, you can find the people that changed sides on sophieinwonderland's blog. This is what happened. I don't need to be polite as pie to people inadvertently harming the CDD community, but I certainly wasn't rude about it

My final post, the fifth post, on the subject was the sad one. "My main was leaked." There are people that stalk my blogs. They send me threats and long asks about the things they'd do to me if they found me. When sophie first came to tumblr, I'd get asks about what people wanted ghost to do to me. In the past, every time a new doxxer comes out of their gross hole, I start getting doxxing threats. l've had people get close to my area.

My main being released means those people are one step closer to actually finding me. It means I'm now getting these kinds of messages in my only safe space.

And the anon who sent my main admitted it was done maliciously. We had a falling out like two years ago, because their asks were getting creepy. When I APOLOGIZED TO THEM for ever hurting them because of my own avoidance issues, and told them that on this post, their response was, "well I enjoyed sending them so fuck you." If I ever find that post deleted, I've got a screenshot. You were NOT a minor at the time, you're an adult.

... Nice, really mature. You're definitely safe for minors.

Hey, also, minors, if an adult you just met online calls you "my kiddo", don't respond with an ovo face. Run.

Adults, if you call a minor your kiddo and they're like, owo really, I'm your kiddo? Fucking run.

Anyways.

I haven't said anything since. What can say. My main is out and I'm getting threats on it. Currently. Not "in the future," like the person said. It's happening NOW.

What do all you people want from me? I AM trying to leave you all alone. Stop saying such terrible things about me, godDAMN. I am not harassing minors. I don't want to harass anyone.

WHAT DID I ACTUALLY DO WRONG? I don't understand.

You're not the good guys you think you all are.

Not anymore.

I don't know that you ever were.

[candywife333]

Delulu is the Solulu

PART 1- Hairy Big Toe

AND PART 1 is finally out. Planning 2-3 parts for this.

Chubby OC (with PCOS) x simp idol Jungkook

No proofreading done

Summary: Our OC (Lee Ireum) loves Jungkook of BTS to pieces. She loves him through the distance of her screen and in fact is one of his avid fan club members. She is running for president of the ARMY fan club in her home town. But, she has a peculiarity about her, that even her fellow members in arms don't know about her. She never wants to meet them. She never wants to meet BTS, and she especially never wants to meet Jungkook. She believes in never meeting your heroes because they will end up disappointing you, eventually. To hold up this ideal, she has never been to their in person events. However, though she has never been to a fan meet ,she is supposed to attend one the coming week (at the blackmailing insistence of one of her friends). Yet, she had started to text a dude through a popular dating app around the same time all of this was happening.

It had started out as a prank, this dating profile. She would post sexy pics , have amusing chats with thirsty dudes, and then block them for the shits and giggles. Living the true online play girl life, something she would never do in real life cause of insecurities. The odd thing with the dude she is texting though is that the time stamps of the texts are not showing up in Korean time, it almost seemed like Eastern standard time. And the odder thing was that closer to her fan meet date, the time stamps changed back to korean standard time. The question was, who exactly was she chatting with?

Description : This fic will be written with chat messages in between (dilineated by bullets), alternating with the usual writing.

Disclaimer: The character of Jungkook in this fic is not a true representation of his real life actions or personality. Please treat this is fiction.

Triggers: voyeurism, dub-conish , body insecurity (chubby hairy OC incoming)

I opened up my phone to see the recent chats I had received from the new dating app I signed up for a week back. Damn, so many requests within a few hours from when I finished updating my blank profile with pics of myself (of course since it is just a thirst trap account without my face) which were just way too scandalous for real life. I opened up the first chat that I received.

bunnyboy7- Show me your tits🤤

The hell, guys were that straightforward? I thought I would at least get a little segue and introduction, luring me in, before being asked for my literal boobs in a pic.

strawcakes4- Excuse me? Sir this is a Wendy's drive through👵.

bunnyboy7- Then, at least show me your ass🍑

Damn, this dude was way too relentless. I didn't even show a hint of cleavage in my actual pics on the dating profile to signal that I might be open to showing anybody anything. How did this random guy, think he had the honor of seeing first my tits? and then my bare ass? I guess dude didn't yet know that I had a hairy ass. Even monkeys would be envious. I even had a few hairs on my tits. I grew chest hair before guys in my class did. Even had upper lip hair to match. Had to get that little bitch ripped off my face every Sunday with my handy dandy waxing pot, otherwise I would be sporting a rather impressive moustache most of the time. Dude, didn't know what he was even asking for.

strawcakes4- I think you have the wrong number Sir Bunny

bunnyboy7- Trust me baby, you won't regret me.

strawcakes4- What are you going to say next? champagne confetti? too predictable dude. You think you are JK or something🤨?

bunnyboy7- In fact yes I do, my fair lady. (5:00 AM EST)

strawcakes4- They say the world is made up of mostly sane poeple. I am beginning to doubt this claim. Delulu is not the solulu my friend. 😌No matter how much you and I both wish you were JK, that is not reality.

bunnyboy7- Ok, well how about you assume I am JK and why don't you show your favorite , cutest global pop-star your bellybutton then? Ask not what your JK can do for you, but what you can do for your JK. It is for a noble cause.

strawcakes4- Excuse me? how desperate are you dude? We progressed from ass, to tits, to belly button? You have a fetish or something? And now you claim to be JK---THE SHEER AUDACITY?! JK would be too busy earning millions ,performing at times square, eating noodles drenched in perilla oil, hanging out with calvin klein models. He would not be sitting here looking so pathetic.

bunnyboy7- Sometimes stars have needs too. Ok!? We don't have models gyrating 10 feet away from us all the time, contrary to popular opinion. And sometimes we do our own laundry. Is that so hard for you to fucking believe?!

What were the odds of this guy actually being jungkook? He was probably a troll or delusional fanboy who thought he was JK. He sure was putting in a lot of effort to convince me though. Rolling my eyes, I scrolled further down to reply:

strawcakes4- clutching my forehead in disbelief you need to get over yourself dude. If you are Jungkook, I am bloody britney spears. I am not sending nudes or sexting you. OFF to HORNY JAIL WITH YOU, YOUNG MAN!! 🔥If you were truly JK, you wouldn't be begging, you would already be receiving. bunnyboy7- Fine, fine fine, if you can't send me nudes or sext with me, let's play a game of 20 questions.

strawcakes4- Ok?

bunnyboy7- What does your pussy look like? describe it in no less than 20 words. Your timer starts now😉

This dude had balls of steel, he even wanted a pussy description. He would probably run for the hills if he actually saw my furry snatch in person. Chewing on my lip, deliberating my next response, I typed out:

strawcakes4- Ok, "JK", I think …………….I have contracted syphilis from my step father in Transylvania and I am about to die. So………….I am leaving the chat…………….to go get it treated.

bunnyboy7- Don't lie to me like that strawbaby!!! Don't you dare leave this chat.

------Strawcakes4 has left the chat

bunnyboy7- Goddamnit. Ok forget about pussy. At least show bobs.🤤 (5:10 AM EST)

bunnyboy7- Fuck, I came on to her way too hard I guess

Giggling and kicking my feet as I lay on my bed, I chuckled, sounding like a pig snorting in the process. At least he figured out, that he was coming on to me way too hard and way too inappropriately.

I sat there contemplating whether I should delete his chat log and block him. I usually did that after 2-3 interactions with particularly horny dudes, or even after 1 interaction with really annoying clingy guys. Here for a good time, not a long time fellas. I was literally baffled when some of them were using me for therapy sessions. Like, why should I do so much unpaid work?! Like hell I was wasting my time talking to these dudes constantly .

I didn't mind flirting, bantering and eventually sharing pics after building a rapport (not like I kept them for long in my dms either way). But the way this dude had come on so strong was perplexing and rather irritating. I had come across this type of behavior from many other dudes. But he was the first one to not even say Hi. Usually the other dudes had decency to atleast greet her and then start their lewd demands. Pathetic buffoon.

I flopped onto my back, sighing over the fact that I would have to attend that fan meet in a few days. I did not want to meet any of the members of BTS. The only idols I had an intention of meeting in my life were MAMAMOO. I loved their vibe and would feel comfortable in their presence. My main reason for wanting to meet was also so I could ask Hwasa to step on my face with her high heels. The lady was a divine goddess. Sometimes I just wished I was lesbian, because so many things would be easier. Finding men attractive, was a curse.

Running for president of our BTS fanclub in our hometown was a feat. You can only print out so many posters of Jimin's luscious lips, and Jin's windswept perfectly tousled hair, before you get tired of seeing them. Somedays I got so tired of doing BTS related activities, like chaperoning younger armys to attend their music shows and meets in Korea. It was fine when I was a younger teen in middle school, but as a college junior it felt taxing at times.

I had seen the members from afar but never went to actual fan meets where you could interact or talk to them. Convinced it would lead to disillusionment at their carefully manufactured images and heartache, I rejected attending those type of meets. My baby members always pushed me attend, wanting me as a chaperone so their parents would feel comfortable with them attending. I just couldn't though, and they would stare back at me with their puppy dog eyes disheartened at my refusal. But, something about my attitude as a fan had changed. I still loved them to the moon and back, but I guess it was getting tiring.

I had different priorities I guess, like getting a new job with the marketing degree I was to graduate with next year. I groaned at the prospect of finding a place to live next year. My dorm room would be gone and I would have to look for a flat since mom and dad lived in the countryside.

Two days later, I was met with another stream of texts from the same person, bunnyboy7. Why in the fucking hell was he bothering me now? Especially with the dreaded fan meet I had to attend in a few days. Armies looked out for each other, and the main reason for me to attend wasn't honestly even about running for president. It was the responsibility of looking after the young, impressionable minds that would be attending. Had to make sure they didn't get hurt in a crowd, or break down. You would be surprised how many people tended to cry a river and lose their bloody mind when seeing their favorite idols.

I opened the chat log:

bunnyboy7- you there angel? my beautiful goddess? temptress of my dreams, or shall I say tittytress of my fantasies😏😏

I scoffed as I stared at the screen, what the hell was he on? weed? nicotine? You would think one rejection would be enough to get my point across, to convey my distaste.

strawcake4- Ummmmm. Why are you still talking to me dude? I am not interested in sexting or nudes. Leave me alone, I am way too busy for this right now

bunnyboy7- I have been fisting myself everyday to the pic you posted of yourself in a see through black babydoll dress with your tits drooping down , perfect size for my hands to squeeze. I almost came as I could see your thick thighs, just the right size to have wrapped around my neck as I lick your juicy little pussy😜 Please at least take pity on a poor man and post a feet pic. (7:00 AM KST)

strawcake4- Ok dude, this convo has prolonged far enough. If you have a boner, I will deflate it in two seconds flat, that's all I need. My toes are hairy, my tummy is hairy, my legs are ......you guessed it hairy and so is the rest of my body. I look like a cross between a chubby baboon and a chimpanzee. Now , unless you are into bestiality, you won't want to engage further with me. Leave me the fuck alone.

I expected no response from him, confident in my abilities to turn off men. The dude would have deleted the chat by now. Checking out of sheer curiosity, I was shocked, gasping as sweat beaded on my hairline, at his reply:

bunnyboy7- It's ok baby, we can just shave it all off if it bothers you, no biggie. 😋But I like my pussies hairy , a whole jungle, so don't worry in the least. And I can tell just from your pics, that I would drown in your pussy and never come up for air. It would be a glorious way to go, don't you think darling 🤓

I was breathless as I stared at his text, what the hell did he mean? He didn't mind all the body hair and my fat little self?

strawcake4- stop messing around dude, you are just lying. Now let us just end the convo, you are fooling nobody.

bunnyboy7- Who said I was lying baby😏. Just send one pic of your choosing of your body. And I will prove it to you. (7: 05 AM KST)

I shouldn't be doing this. But my fingers moved to my photo gallery and I picked out one pic I had taken in dim light of my tits and tummy, intact with strawberry red lingerie that showed hints of fine downy hair here and there. He would probably be turned off and we could end this interaction. I paused several minutes, indecisive about sending the pic.

bunnyboy7- You still there babe? please babygirl, I am salivating at the thought of you. Send a pic, any pick. The mere thought of you is keeping me on the verge of cumming. (7: 10 AM KST )

I took a deep breath, not dragging the pic through my editing app, and clicked SEND, closing my eyes at the thought of what I had just done, wincing a little. I peeked at the screen with one eye open, he was typing. I almost jolted up towards the ceiling as I saw what he had written, my panties getting damp involuntarily.

bunnyboy7- OMG BABY🤤🤤I can't handle all your beauty. The perfect tits, tipped with chocolate brown areolas. I could just bite into them. And that gorgeous collection of pudge around your belly, your skin and flesh looks so soft. I can't believe I am saying this but........I would even lick your armpits and your asshole if you would let me. Totally my dream girl. I am cumming, oh ma god , I can't hold back anymore.

Before, I could reread his text, I received a pic. WTF!!!! My soul almost left my body, it was a pic of cum all squirted out , translucent and stringy onto his plain white sheets.

bunnyboy7- A tribute to you my luscious goddess. If only I could see you in motion, in 3D babe, to truly worship you. (7: 15 KST)

Something in my brain started tugging at me as I sat there on my bed stunned at all his proclamations of lust. Wait, when did his time zone change from EST to KST??? Didn't Jungkook just come back to Korea a few days back? It definitely couldn't be him , right ? We already had a joking convo about that. What type of reverse psychology was he using, if it was actually him?

I was about to dismiss the thought from my head when I saw his cum pic. Wait, I had seen that tattoo somewhere. His pic had part of his hand in the frame. If you weren't an army who had hung up his posters all of your school, you might not have a clue. But, the M on one of his knuckes, was a big give away. I still found it hard to believe even with the evidence. Why would Jungkook of BTS, the beloved, hot and happening global popstar, be texting me? And what had become of my vow never to interact with them?

Had I actually just now talked to Jungkook? And seen his cum sprayed all over his sheets? and had him simping over hairy little, big foot me? Since when did people like me talk with people like them?

[vexingwoman]

Uh not actually here to hate but to say thanks???? Ive been thinking alot on my self expression and trying to figure out how to word it, and seeing some of your comments with other people really helped to put in perspective what I was trying to come to terms with. Ive always struggled with my gender but acknowledge fully that I'm biologically female. (Stay with me here till the end please i know lol) I genuinely dont care what pronouns I'm called either and none have ever felt right if I'm honest and nothing I've read or tried has been adding up for me over the years to help me feel any better.

Kinda realizing over the past year or so that I just have this deep ingrained idea from being surrounded constantly my whole life in a woman hating environment that I just have a *really* heavily masked hatred for what general society treats women as and was trying to remove myself from it hoping itd somehow save me from the terrible shit we all go through daily. And it just made me feel even more alienated doing that to myself. Its been a long time of coming around to this and I know how it sounds but I dont wanna consider any of my time wasted. I dont remember what it was but something you said to someone in a long ass comment fight clicked for me and rn I'm sleep deprived and wont even remember what it was in the morning either but I feel like some kind of weight has been eased off me. Im doing my best to unlearn the sexist misogynistic bs ive had shoved down my throat my whole life that made me think being a woman was something to be shameful of and better off without.

Its been hard trying to look into this radfem community and find someone who didn't immediately just insult and exclude ppl that werent already on the ball agreeing. Basically I appreciate your ranting with strangers. Amd indulging some of their curiousity as clearly as you can+defining everything you say constantly so I dont get lost in a whirlwind of hard to understand metaphors. Idk you get it. Something clicked and i dont feel ashamed for the time gone bc I know it was heavily influenced by the oppression of all things normal-human-womanly around me. I hate that we're all so tied into these stereotypes. Its painfully hard to unlearn. Thanks for the help. Have a fat block of text as thanks cause I'm not sure how to sound as genuine as I feel rn. Have a nice day and an even better tomorrow. Im gonna get some sleep now💀(stayed up WAY too late painting lol) bye!

This is so wonderful to hear. I know how dreadful it is doing serious introspection and making yourself aware of how deeply and unconsciously your internalized sexism runs. I’ve been there, and I know it’s even more difficult to deconstruct the subtle sexist attitudes which have been ingrained into to us since birth. Often it seems as hopeless as chasing smoke, because some of our internalized sexism is so deep that it’s invisible, and worse, inarticulable.

Some women will never think on these subjects beyond their surface level—will never dissect their preferences, will never concede that their choices are influenced by sex-based socialization, will never seriously reflect on why they are so desperate to identify out of womanhood. And in a strange way, I sympathize with these women, because I understand that it’s easier to shut your eyes and convince yourself that you were born in the wrong body than it is to open your eyes and acknowledge how much sexism has seeped into and corrupted our own minds.

Basically, I’m proud of you for putting yourself through the pain of deconstructing your own internalized sexism. You are better for even attempting it, and I hope you continue to do so.

P.S. I know exactly which long-ass comment fight you’re referring to, because I only put myself through that once. At least someone benefited from the literal month I spent arguing with that stranger. They blocked me, so unfortunately I can’t even go back and analyze the conversation if I ever wanted to. I would love to know what you took away from it, if you ever do remember.

[delucadarling]

Current rambling thoughts on dieting/weight loss, nothing that's a downer:

Back in April I got blood test results that showed my cholesterol was high and my sugar was barely shy of being diabetic. It spooked the shit out of me, as despite being fat most of my life, I was also pretty healthy and somewhat active. It was after getting covid that I was so fatigued I dropped the active thing pretty much entirely.

The doctor was more focus on the sugar, and recommended cutting back simple sugars, adding in more fiber, and increasing my weekly activity.

I'd been wanting to get back into shape for a long, long time but I've been nervous about trying the gym again. My dad was one of those shithead people that secretly films people in the gym doing things 'wrong' or committing the sin of being fat in public. It had me terrified of trying to get fit where other people could see me, because you know, most people don't want to be mocked.

Lucky me, I have the most amazing, supportive girlfriend ever. She took me by the hand and very gently showed me around the gym, helped me learn how to use the machines, and didn't mind when I shadowed her around as she did her workout. From there, I got excited! I used to LOVE working out, I just mostly did simple stuff, running, and swimming. I did a lot of WiiFit when I was younger, and this one Jillian Michael's DVD I found at Walmart for like $5 at the time. Running was the big one though (hello Zombies, Run folks).

So just making those changes (less soda, more fiber, more exercise) over the course of maybe 3ish months I dropped almost 15 lbs. I hadn't been tracking my weight, but I did compare the results the doctor took from my previous three appointments. I was kind of shocked! I've never had a healthy relationship with weight loss, and every time I've tried to lose weight it lead to a lot of heartache, misery, and doubled weight gain. So I more or less wrote off my ability to trim down and decided to just be fat and happy.

I will say though, the extra bulk has recently frustrated me. I can't do yoga the way I used to. My limbs are still flexible but I keep getting blocked by my own fat. I have to go real easy on my joints because of all the extra weight, which is frustrating, because I'd honestly love to try jogging again. I just don't want to fuck my back and knees up again.

I decided to give losing weight another try, with a lot more self-love, after a lot more research, and with the support of someone who has loved me even at my fattest and never said a word about it.

It hasn't been too hard this time. I don't feel like I'm depriving myself. I am impatient, I want to see results NOW, but obviously that's not how things work. And slow is better anyway.

I know tumblr has a generally negative view on weight loss, and I fully include myself in that. I bought into the 'starvation mode means you'll never ACTUALLY lose weight permanently) thing, I was convinced anyone trying to lose weight had the same disordered ideas on it that I used to have (and still struggle with sometimes). It's a loaded topic for a hundred reasons, so I am trying to be conscious of when I talk about it and around who. Hence the tags and putting it under a cut. I'm happy and excited to be trying this out, putting my health first, trying to feel strong and capable in my body, but I absolutely know first hand how upsetting hearing about dieting can be. Not to mention how hard it is to avoid the more toxic side of trying to change your diet and fitness.

I've found a lot of resources that are very facts based, cut and dry, and leave out the moralizing behind weight loss and weight gain and just weight in general. There are a lot of very encouraging resources as well.

So yeah! As said, this is just a ramble, I like to write to get my thoughts down, and it always comes easier when it feels like I'm talking to someone, not just myself. I probably won't post a lot about this, but it's been just over a week since I started tracking my food and daily weight specifically, which always used to be something that would send me into a bad habit spiral. This time feels different. I've been doing fine. There have been a few moments of disappointment, but they've been easy to shake off. Mostly I'm just astounded to learn more about the macros involved in the food I eat, and I'm also happy to have tools to help me find portions that make me feel full and not stuffed. On the days I've been not kept to my deficit goals, it was because I was hungry and decided it was more worth it to feed myself than stick to a number and I didn't feel a bit of guilt about it afterward.

I'm pretty pleased with how it's going so far. I feel stronger, I feel more energetic, and tracking my food intake and weight makes the part of my brain that loves a spreadsheet very happy.

[little-lucid-dreamer97]

A Late Night Stroll ( Continued from Picture Perfect Day) .

Dream Of The Endless X Witch F!Reader.

Reader works super late at the hospital and Dream decides to surprise her and walk her home and it starts to rain, labels are made. (More Fluff). (I'll get to the swim but this has me in a choke hold right now they are so cute).

The end of the day couldn't have come soon enough and you exhaled a sigh of relief as the automatic doors slid closed behind you with a swoosh. They had stuck you inside the clinic today and the patients just kept coming without end, each one with an illness worse then the other and each had the same things to say. they waited so long because they couldn't afford to see a doctor when the symptoms started, its despicable the hoops mortal must jump through just to have access to heal care. the night air hit your skin and soothed your acing joints and warm skin, the smell of night air washed over you and you could feel the energy in the air.

It was going to rain tonight, it was going to storm.

Just as the thought crosses your mind a bolt of lightning lights up the sky and parking lot your walking across. you car pulled with a coworker that day so you didn't have a car, no you were walking home tonight.

"Caw!" the Raven glided over head. you followed it with your eyes and watched it land at the feet of a figure draped in shadow. another bolt of lightning lit up the parking lot to reveal what you already new. Dream had traveled from the Dreaming to the waking world and was standing just ahead of you, with Mathew standing at his feet. a small smile graced his lips as he walked to meet you half way. "well hello there". you greet them both with a surprised tone. "what are you doing here?, we weren't supposed to meet till tomorrow night". you said in Surprise as you leaned up on your tippy toes to kiss Dreams cheek, he smelled of the night air and the rain that was on its way.

A small smile tugged at his lips as he looked down at you. There was something almost comical about the way he towers over you, but something intoxicating about the look in his eyes as he stares down into yours's.

"I may have sent Mathew to check on you and he saw that you were readying to leave and I thought perhaps". He paused a moment glancing around the empty, dark parking lot with some concern "That I could walk you home tonight while I have some occupied time".

You smiled and nodded. "That would be nice actually". you two began the walk back to your apartment silently at first. you walked side by side not touching but close enough to feel his movements and the energy he gave off. The night air was cool and damp, rain clouds covered the sky and hid the moon from view

After several blocks you decided to speak "for the record, I don't need to be protected, I can take care of myself". You said matter of factlly not looking at him. you may be young and soma what new at the magic thing but you know your way around things enough and were not entirely mortal.

"and for that I have no doubt". he said quietly. "My intensions are not for your safety but for your time, as I said I had a few moments and thought it right to give them to you". he took a deep breath and continued. "as it turns out Lucienne can manage a bit more in the dreaming then had thought which means I have a little extra time to myself these days and well.....". he side eyed you. "I guess I wanted to see you sooner then tomorrow night".

"I'm sorry, I wish I could come by more often I've just been so busy lately" you sigh heavily and run your fingers through your hair. "I guess we just met at a wired time". you shrug.

"I need no apologies, you have job in which you find joy". he says. "and from what I've seen in dreams that is a rare thing in deed these days".

"you don't enjoy you're job?" you ask. the wind was beginning to pick up and the smell of rain got stronger.

"it is less my job as it is my purpose and function, there is some joy I suppose". the tone of his voice made your heart hurt, there was sadness and loneliness hinted at the edge.

"you make you're own joy, my mom used to say that". you said. "and I'll take whatever time you have and I do enjoy my job thank you for understanding". thunder thudded from above and lightning cracked sending a wave of blazing white light across the world around you. you see that the sky was completely dark now and shiver.

"your understanding means a lot, I've been told in the past I've been neglectful in these circumstances, I would like to not make the same mistakes". rain began to fall in a light drizzle.

"circumstance?". you ask with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. there's no way he's going to be the first to say it. are you ready to have a label?. is he?. sure he's all you think about, all you've ever wanted in a partner and he's not even human which means you don't have to worry about hiding the down world part of your life. there was nothing you had to hide about you're life from Dream.

"relationships".

Your heart leaped into you're throat and you stopped in your tracks turning to him. he said it. you both stare at each other for what feels like forever before you open your mouth to speak but were cut off by rain turning from a drizzle to a down pour in seconds. words lots you stare into his ocean blue eyes now wide and filled with uncertainty and allow yourself to get lost in them. rain ran down his face and into your eyes as you both stood there getting wet.

"is- is that what you want?, your not just saying that? -".

He stepped closer all the uncertainty drifting from his gaze replaced now by desire and longing, he pulled you to him and without a word he leaned down and pushed his lips to yours. the kiss was salty and wet from the rain, soft and gentle at first but you melt into him and he wines his arms around you cupping your head with one hand making the kiss deeper and keeping you steady with the other. you reach up and wrap your arms around his neck. his hair stuck to it because of the rain and you let your fingers play with the ends.

your heart pounded and you felt the need for air. you pull away gasping and smiling. "I love you". it slipped out before you could stop it and you gasped in shock and horror. oh gods what the hell is wrong with you?. but to your surprise he smiled through the rain.

"I love you too, I have since the moment you sat down on that bench, since the first I heard your voice and saw your smile". he cupped your face with both hands and looked deeply into your eyes. his shined like stars in the night sky and reflected the love he proclaimed. "you are my joy, my love". he leaned in and kissed you again. there was a whooshing sound and suddenly the rain was gone and you were warm and everything was dry.

You pulled away and saw that you now stood in a bedroom, Dream's bedroom. there was a roaring fire in the grates and a tray with a steaming pot on the table in front of it. you were still soaked from the rain and shivered in his embrace. "I'll find you something dry to wear and then some tea and then". he pecked your lips again.

You glance over at the bed and bat your eyes innocently "I'm sure we can find SOMTHING to occupie the time we have left tonight".

"yes we shall" he traced your lips with his thumb chuckling softly.

************************************************************************

P1 https://www.tumblr.com/ladylokisarmy/725766407901577216/dream-x-f-witch-reader?source=share

I'm getting to the swim I promise I want the work up to be worth it!. I'm also working on the meeting part and a few other things. I decided to make this a series instead of a one off!. hope you all enjoy!.

[angelselene]

I just had several Wreckage related thoughts (PTSD tw):

Ed and Roy are casually invited to a neighborhood BBQ, early in their time in the CM world, and they figure it's another phrase for a block party or something.

So, they get there a little early,.and then the dogs and burgers are put on.

Roy pales and his eyes unfocus and he starts to tremble. But he can't move. And he can't see the grill.

And their new neighbors turn to greet them, and *they* freeze, and Ed's like "i'm so sorry we have to go" and Ed drags Roy back to their place.

There are a handful of ways they can go from there, but I'm thinking Ed sticks Roy in the shower, because rain wasn't in Ishval, and even if it was, he's useless in the rain so he couldn't have been... working.

They so not go to bbqs after that.

Relatedly, Roy can't tolerate even the smell of meat for weeks afterwards, and they have to stay indoors for days.

But that's not to mention the fireworks that come that night, after the BBQ.

They... don't do well for quite some time.

(They at least know to expect fireworks on New Year's)

Ooooh, Ed and Roy taking a few days off on either side of July 4th to avoid going outside.

(And then fucking LABOR DAY why are they barbecuing today?!)

(Memorial Day is an issue too, but they miraculously miss it that first year)

Hmmm... I bet Roy can't eat most (maybe any) red meat...

Anywho. Had that thought and needed to share. C:

Okay, I have had this stuck in my inbox for like, almost six months at this point. Not because I didn't like the idea (I love the idea) but because I wanted to write it and surprise people and...

...I have tried. I tried to write it just as a one-off, to celebrate milestones on the series (1,000 public bookmarks, 5,000 kudos, both of which are amazing achievements I'd be happy to celebrate with), tried to write it for 10/3... and it's just... it won't come. I don't know if it's something about this particular emotional beat that I don't feel like I can write (I don't think it's that, because I've written similar to it), or if it's just that I marked the series as Complete and in my brain, the part of it that thought about the Wreckage-verse is just closed, but I've got like... 600 words of them buying their house, and nothing else.

And it is not a good 600 words. It is not a 600 words you'd want to be part of the Wreckage series. Usually, it's a sign I'd take to scrap it and start over, but after a still very recent irl upset, I just don't have the heart to push through and make myself write it. Writing anything right now is hard, and something I just couldn't make work before that upset is, unfortunately, not on the table right now. Sorry, Ryan, I really, really tried.

What I have been considering, if anyone is interested, is posting some of the original runs I did at an FMA/Criminal Minds crossover. I probably mentioned it in comment replies or maybe even in an author's note somewhere, but what became Wreckage is actually my third attempt at a FMA/CM crossover. One of them, I didn't get more than maybe a couple thousand words (I know, I know, only a couple thousand), but one, I got... quite a bit more done, and it's a pretty different angle because it has the BAU ending up in Amestris instead of the other way around.

That version required a lot more plotting, and when I realized that, I scrapped it (you all think I'm kidding when I tell you I hate writing plot), and moved on to a version where Ed and Roy ended up in CM 'verse instead. I have like... 16k of that. It's not all complete scenes, but if people would like, I can post what I have of it.

So... let me know.

[risingsouls]

What's all this with the rpc making you a villain?

[I should first preface this with the fact that it isn't the DB RPC. In fact, the Dragonball RPC, save for a few times, has always been chill and a really great place to hang out. There are some really cool and creative people here, and I'm so grateful for them. They're also very chill and, for the most part, can recognize the difference between a harmless opinion about a character in a series, the difference between IC and OOC thoughts and behaviors, and actual, harmful "vague blogging" and toxic behavior.

The rest under the cut because I sort went overboard.

That said, that's basically what I've been dealing with for months in another RPC (which I'm sure plenty of you know which it is if you know my blog count). In short, I've been lectured and turned into a monster by a very clique-ish RPC seemingly for my character not always being sunshine and rainbows and for both of us having opinions that go against the grain of the rest of them. It seems that since a mun did not like the way my character interacted with theirs--this was all IC I want to let you know--they've spread a whole bunch of lies about me being a bully and toxic to the rest of the RPC, which is small and, according to someone who decided to lecture me, "everyone" in this RPC are friends and they all talk (first telling me plainly you're not part of the "in" group so you can't "misbehave" like their friend did with ACTUAL vague blogging in this particular scenario as well as confirming the very clique-ish nature of the RPC). Through this is how THEY heard about how "terrible" I am and told me they didn't want to RP with me. Which you know, on it's face, whatever. That part wasn't the issue and I'm sure you can see what was.

So, since then, it's been a constant fight against people, anonymously or not, coming at me over literal nothing posts. Telling me I shouldn't "vague blog", passive aggressively telling me that there is an X character blog in the RPC and that mine or my character's "harsh" opinion might hurt their feelings. For then and perpetually having to defend myself and explain my POV, that my character isn't a ray of sunshine, that IC =/= OOC. Just to be told I was the one being aggressive and rude and a horrible person for doing nothing wrong from the jump. For making a nothing post about, in this most recent case, the portrayal of a character IN A CANON(ish) SOURCE (it's a side game that technically isn't part of the canon, for reference). Nothing about how someone played them. Nothing about any particular mun. Literally just IC commentary from my character and a short, fair critique of the depiction of this character in this particular source material. Oh, and then it was a lecture about doing it "publicly" (the conversation was in replies where the person STARTED IT I should add), so...you know.

And that's not mentioning the blatant double standard there seems to be when I have friends that post similar stuff and never hear a peep from anyone about it. They're not blocked by basically everyone. They're not getting messages or replies to their posts with people clutching their pearls and lecturing about RP decorum.

I've been basically blocked by at least half of that RPC, a ton of them people I've never even interacted with, so I can't help but feel some type of way about what might be being said about me behind closed doors. I'm not even sure if the story I told you above is where this started. I did make a mistake that I owned up to years ago when I lost my temper, so I'm not sure if that ordeal got me a bad rep or if it's just all this recent garbage that people have flung at me for just...running my stupid blog. For my character being rougher around the edges and for both of us being outspoken and opinionated. Like I understand I won't be everyone's cup of tea. That's fine. But as I've said...I can't help but feel this is a targeted effort. That this is a group of people poisoning my name and putting me on an RPC wide DNI list.

This probably sounds like me playing the victim, but I really don't understand why it's happening. At all. Everyone I've talked to that knows the situation are as stumped as me. I just really don't get it, and there's nothing I can do about it. I guess I just have to accept my role of the resident monster and just RP with the people who give me a chance and who know me already.]

[viridian-artist]

Hiii!!! This is an excuse for you to gush about your f/os as much as you want :3c

Hehehehehehe, sorry for taking so long with this. I'm gonna use this excuse for evil < talking about Caine since he's been on my mind all week thanks to episode two.

I SHOULD ALSO NOTE THAT YES, I STILL VERY MUCH LOVE CAINE EVEN AFTER THE EVENTS OF EPISODE TWO.

》 HOW DID WE MEET?

Easy. I showed up a little bit before Pomni. At least a month or so. We obviously met when I first arrived, and he set us on some adventure to break into a cyberpunk discotheque to get the DJ's playlist. Hijinks ensued, but we didn't properly meet one on one until he threw us into a haunted house to exterminate the ghosts. I didn't want to exactly participate this time around, like Zooble, and instead stayed back in the circus.

He saw me playing with some blocks and just relaxing for a bit alone, and decided to invade my space then to chat. He was just curious to see how I was doing now that I was a part of the gang. I didn't speak much as I was just mentally tired, but I did respond to any questions. It only made him more curious to learn why I act the way I do.

》 WHO FELL FIRST AND HOW?

My dumb ass (affectionate) fell first and hard. I think it was initially a gradual "Oh, he's kind of silly" before a sudden and heavy "OH, I ACTUALLY LIKE-LIKE HIM".

I confided in Pomni and Ragatha at first, and they didn't understand at first, but they wanted to help me confess.

》 HOW DOES THE CONFESSION GO?

The confession...didn't exactly go to plan? At least, not how I planned it out, even considering him being an AI and all. He didn't understand/register my confession as being romantic. He thought, at the time, that I was just thanking him for the adventures and everything.

It hurt at first, but then I managed to push it aside? With how I love, I can't exactly get over it. I love with my entire heart.

Surprisingly, Jax was the one who managed to corner Caine with Ragatha by his side. The two talked with him firmly to tell him exactly how I feel.

He doesn't quite reciprocate my feelings at the time, but he does stop by my room that night to talk with me more personally.

》 WHAT WAS THE FIRST DATE LIKE?

He took me to the restaurant where he was with Bubble back in episode one. He even ropes the others into it by making it an adventure where they have to run the restaurant for the evening.

He's nervous and stumbling over his words because he recognizes that this is something important. Not just to me, but for him as well.

I'm nervous and stumbling over my words because I just think he's really dorky and charming. I also want the date to go well, but I find myself getting shy.

By the end of the date, we both actually had a lovely time despite Gangle and Pomni accidentally spilling the spaghetti on me (and dropping the entire roll of paper towels onto the floor). He actually offers to walk me back to my room, and from there, he kisses my hand. I pull him closer and kiss him on the upper jaw before going back to my room for the night.

》 WHAT WAS THE FIRST KISS LIKE?

Awkward. Felt like kissing a firm yet squishy plastic? It's kind of like a squishy/stress toy but more firm. There's a subtle squish to his teeth.

I was the one who kissed him first. It was the only way I could think at the time to shut him up. The two of us were arguing. I had wanted to go on an adventure with the others, but he wanted some alone time with me. I ended up being more stubborn and going, but after we got back, he brought me outside the circus tent to talk.

I don't remember the exact conversation that took place, but he was just feeling rather clingy that day but didn't realize it. When he did, he felt guilty and was starting to spiral a bit, which led to me kissing him to show I wasn't actually angry at him like he thought I was.

He didn't register the kiss at first, but when he did, he went in for another. And then another. And then–

(I SHOULD ALSO NOTE THAT MY SELF INSERT JUST WEARS A MASK THAT IS REMOVABLE TO REVEAL A NORMAL MOUTH.)

Anyways, he had black lipstick all over his face, and my lipstick was smudged. This is also how the others::

1. End up seeing my face.

2. End up realizing that Caine and I actually are dating, and it wasn't just a one-time thing.

》 MISCELLANEOUS INFO

▪︎ Caine is more verbally affectionate and calls me Starshine, Astro Angel, Techno Temptress, Cosmic Cutie, Cyberspace Siren, Digital Dreamer, Cybernova, etc.

I'm more physically affectionate by holding his hand when I can, giving him kisses, etc. When I'm going to bed, a good 8/10 times I end up dragging him with me to cuddle.

▪︎ He is such a sappy romantic and does what he can to romance me. Flowers are a common gift. Caine occasionally gifts me different chains and charms to change out my usual silver star for the tail.

I now have::

• a beaded one in turquoise, baby blue, purple, and navy with balls, stars, and larger beads. It has a plastic star for the end of the tail.

• a purple braided thread one with a heart charm similar to the star also in silver.

• a pearl beaded chain in offwhite with a tooth charm at the end and a dark red/black bowtie just before the tooth charm.

[pbandjesse]

I pushed myself ridiculously hard today. And my back hurts so bad that I have a pillow behind me propping myself up while I'm laying on my side because when I remove the pillow it hurts so bad.

But I really enjoy today and while I was incredibly stressed out thinking about today and ended up being great. And now I'm just stressed out thinking about tomorrow and I know that just means tomorrow also be great probably. It was a really nice day despite the weather.

When I woke up this morning it was pouring outside. I let myself sleep in and woke up around 9:00 and stayed in bed for a long time. I needed to get up and feed sweet tea though and he was being so naughty biting my ankles and my calves. But I felt pretty good and sleeping in honestly make me feel a lot better after how exhausted I had been yesterday.

I also felt really cute today. My hair was doing really nice thing and my makeup was good. I'm trying to wear eyeshadow again to try to fix the issue I'm having with my eyeliner sticking to my eyelid. And it seemed to work. So that's good.

I didn't really know what to do for breakfast. Didn't want cook anything. Once I got all the curtains open and fed sweet pea I looked in the fridge and I found that I had half an omelet from the other day so I want that up. It didn't taste incredible but it was food. And I knew that I was going to take myself to Five guys after my workshop. I had the whole day planned out. I sat at the kitchen island with sweet pea. I had my omelette and a couple little donuts. Which I shared with sweet pea. And I double checked my materials I needed to bring. I had to cut a couple blocks in half because I wanted them to be smaller for the group. Which ended up being incredibly small. The group I mean. But that was fine I was just glad anybody came at all.

I left here around 10:30. I didn't have to be over at the armory until 11:30 but I wanted to stop at Michael's and get more black ink. I was not going to have that issue again because that made me so angry and embarrassed. So I wanted to make sure I have something better. I even had a 30% off coupon.

I poured myself two drinks. A lemonade and a soda and got my umbrella and headed out into the rain. And it was raining very hard. And when I got to the car I realized I left my lemonade and my soda in the house. I had grabbed all my other stuff and forgot those. So I had to go all the way back inside. But it was fine. I was in a really good mood.

I got over to the Michaels and was annoyed that they didn't have any black ink or any actual printmaking ink in the pots I normally buy it. They only have skin printing ink which I've already run into the issue of that not working But they did have a four pack of black yellow and blue block printing ink and I felt like it was too expensive but with my coupon it made it more reasonable at least and I stopped to look at the clearance real quick but then I went to pay and headed out back into the weather. It's all self checkout at the Michaels now but one of the workers still checked on me and she was really nice. I really interacted with a lot of very kind people today and that made me happy.

I was less than a half an hour away from the armory and my GPS said I was going to get there at 11:11 with the rain. And that is basically exactly what happened. The drive was terrible I could hardly see it times. But there was almost no one on the road because I think they were all afraid because it was so bad. Like roads were flooding and I was getting Gail warnings on my phone. But I got over to the armory and that's when my stress started. Because the gate was locked.

I drove past the armory itself and went down the street to the grocery store to wait in the parking lot until I heard from Michael who is my contact. I looked through my email and sent him an email letting him know that I was down the street and then I found his phone number and texted him. Turns out he lives 2 hours away! And he was just stuck in traffic so it was fine. He said when he got there a few minutes before I drove over someone's bumper was stuck in the fence. Like they had driven into it. I didn't see that so it must have happened in the last couple minutes between when I got there and he did. Crazy.

But the workshop ended up being great. He brought his little dog again and she's very sweet. And while I only had two people they were awesome. They were both named Tony. It's probably t o n i. They were sisters and the older sister was a little older than me and the younger sister was probably like 13. And they were so funny. They both have different names but they both go by the nickname Toni. And they were just so nice. I had set up and started a print so that I could be at different steps and show them everything and going off of my experience on Thursday I had like a pretty good system for explaining everything and I think I did a really good job. And both of them were so nice and the two hours went by so quickly we were just having a great time talking about different projects and work and she might contact me to come in with her church which is in the neighborhood that I live in and work with some of the teenage girls there which I think would be lovely and it was just a really nice time. And they kept saying like this was so cool and this was such a good experience. And It was really cool to just introduce them to something that they've never done before. And I explained different ways that they could do it at home because they were both a little intimidated by the idea and I was like well these are some ways that you can do it with stuff that you might already have and some home DIY stuff. And it was great.

While they were working we were talking and I had brought my one book of men illustrations as a reference guide and while I was standing there and they were working I was looking at the book and I'll back it said that there was other versions like one of women I was like oh I should obviously buy that. So I went on eBay and found it for $10 with free shipping. And then I was like hey wait a second on the book itself it said it should be $4 but that was in 1980. Inflation. I'm excited to have the set though. And maybe eventually get the other ones. They apparently have children and animals and food and items. It's a really good reference guide so it would be nice to have more options for when I do these classes.

Once we were finished and I made sure they had my contact information I cleaned everything up and Michael came back with Quinn and I let him know that at one point Gwen was in there playing with a Christmas ornament and she had eaten part of it. But he doesn't think she actually ingested it. I really hope that that's the case because I would feel terrible. I had taken it away from her as soon as I noticed that she was chewing on it. And he said that the rain had stopped. We were very deep into the building where there was no windows so we weren't aware. But I was very glad to go out into the world and it not be pouring as horribly as it had been.

I said goodbye to Michael and let him know that I was available for more stuff and to just let me know and I was even down for helping with their camp again that I had helped before and I didn't mind the very long drive. And he was like whoa that's awesome. So I really hope he does reach out.

And then I had the rest of my day. The armory is right by the Goodwill. And when I went over there I had some amazing finds. I got a pair of ugg driving slippers that are basically new. If I was buying them new I probably would have sized up one but they do fit me very well. I just tend to wear things that are too big for me. And I found a little shelf for $8. And a really cute blue cloth for the top of it. And it's all scratched on top so the cloth covers up the imperfections. So I was doing great. Though it was hard to carry the shelf around the store.

Once I paid I drove a little farther down the street to go to Five guys. And I have a really nice lunch while I worked through the podcast episodes that I apparently had slept through? I thought I was caught up on my show but I started listening to the new episode I'm like I have no idea what's going on. And the breaker whiskey episodes are only like 5 minutes apiece so it wasn't like it was a huge deal to go backwards but I was very confused. I'm going to try to listen to those on a weekly basis because they come out every day but listening to 5 minute chunks is not fun for me. I want at least a half an hour. I do still really recommend that show though. It's very good.

I have texted Meril earlier to ask if my package was delivered because I got an email notification that it was. And she said yes and I was like I'm going to come and get it. So once I was done my lunch I drove out to the museum to say hi to everybody.

And that was great. The sun was basically out by then and I didn't realize that it was the egg drop project at the museum today so it was very busy in there. But it was the end of it so everyone was leaving. But I got to see Jessica and Jesse and Ashley. And I got my package and I did a little unboxing for project at the museum today so it was very busy in there. But it was the end of it so everyone was leaving. But I got to see Jessica and Jesse and Ashley. And I got my package and I did a little unboxing for Meril and Meghan. And it was a lot of my stuff that I had thought for our upcoming trip like the airplane seat foot rest and then stuffable neck pillow and a new tag for our luggage and it was just very silly just opening everything and showing them all the stuff. Especially because I got a whole bunch of fake hair products. Like fake hair that you wear in a ponytail. And they were like why? But my idea is that I'm going to try to figure out how to wear them so they can use them for different looks for the wedding. I haven't 100% figured out what that means yet but we're working on it.

I hung out there for a while just chatting with everybody and catching up. And a little after 3:30 I said goodbye. And decided that before I went home I would drive over to the shopping center and walk around the Five below.

The sun was really out by then and I didn't realize it was going to be so I didn't have my sunglasses and I was kind of dying so I let myself buy some trendy shaped frames from the Five below. And I got nail polish but I ended up hating the color when I got home. Like it's just looked terrible on my fingers. But it's fine. It was worth a shot. And it was $2 so not the worst thing.

I left the Five below and I drove home. I got stuck in a bunch of traffic around the inner harbor. But it was whatever. And when I got home I brought everything inside and went through all of the packages inside my larger package that I have picked up and took all the packaging off of them. And I just use the word packaging so many times. And put everything away. And then went to figure out how I was going to set up the little shelf. And I had a whole plan and ended up working really really well. My original spot I didn't like so I thought about moving one of the two wooden chests that we have over there since the one just has cleaning products in it and I switched out all the cleaning products so that I could put them in the basement with all the other cleaning stuff. And then I moved one of the boxes up to James's room. And then the little shelf fit perfectly and honestly I love how it looks there. And once I was done that I jumped into the next big project of the day. Which was James's room.

I have sent James a drawing the other day about how I thought the layout of the furniture could work better. And they agreed with me and I was not being supervised and so I was very excited to start moving some furniture around.

I was in there for hours. I hung a shelf and I moved a whole bunch of stuff and I just tried to optimize the space. I had a podcast going about creepypastas and was just really enjoying myself. But I also really wanted the couch to be in there. I got the dresser moved and the bookshelf with the plants moved.

Which by the way was a disaster. It started falling apart and one of the plants got knocked over and the things shattered and then I realized it was root bound and I was texting James and I felt so bad and I was trying to move everything and then it just collapsed on me. Thankfully I'd gotten off all the other breakable stuff before that happened but it was very upsetting. But after I did all that I realized how much space was in there now and it would just be so nice for James to have seating in there especially when they have like friends over. And just having flax seeding in your space is so nice. And so I went to try to move the sofa.

Which I don't know if you remember but I got stuck on the stairwell last time I tried to move it by myself. And when me and James had moved it James said that it was just not going to make it on the hallway but I hate being told no. So I wanted to figure it out to surprise them.

But it did not fit. I tried squishing it I tried everything but it was just about 5 in too wide to go down our hallway. So I took a saw to the legs.

I saw the legs off and this was no easy feat. Because I had to make sure it was even. I made the sofa 27 in wide. Which fit down our hallway and at the narrowest point of the doors it was 28 in. So I had to take the doors off because with the doors on it was 25 in. And I've never taken a door off before so that was a whole exciting thing and I have not tried to put them back on yet because I think you need two people for it. So I took off the doors of the little room and of James's room and over-ended the sofa down the hall and I got it in the office. I was very proud of myself but man wasn't ridiculous.

Once I got it in the room I was kind of exhausted but I had torn up James's whole room and I wasn't going to leave it like that. So I took a moment and got a drink and came back and started figuring out how to reattach the legs. This was not easy. And I should probably go back in and add more supports but I drilled the legs on an angle and I put a very long screw in it and then on the one side I used hinges that I had and I put the hinges the wrong direction so that they will act as a brace and it's ugly but it worked. I will definitely have to figure out a more long-term solution at some point but I sat on it for a while and I wiggled around and it seems pretty secure. So baller. I'm the best.

I really can't wait to show my parents everything that we've done in the house for better or for worse. I text my mom some dates the other day and if she is reading this I hope that she answers me and tells me what date will work the best for them. Because I would really like to show them everything.

And once I got the sofa set up I moved a bunch of stuff onto the sofa so that I could continue to work on putting things away best I could. I finally had enough space to vacuum up the dirt from when I knocked over the plants. And I looked at James's closet which they had said was two full to put anything in and I was like James there's barely anything in here you just don't have it laid out well so I took everything out of the closet and I realized that if I took out the wire rack that was in there when we moved I could fit the bookcase that had fallen on me in there and so I drug that back down the hallway and reassembled it and hopefully it is more secure now. And I made sure there's no breakable stuff on it this time because it is too fragile for that. And I just started putting stuff away. I did realize that there's a dead space on the wall that I think James would benefit from having some shelves there and then they can put some other knickknacks up there and open up some more space. But it was looking really good and I went through a couple of the bags of clothes that they have and then it turns out those were donation stuff. I was texting James basically this whole time. And filling the minimum what was going on. So I wasn't doing anything without their permission and they were excited that I was getting so much accomplished and I was feeling so good about getting so much accomplished. Even though I was exhausting myself.

I would finish up as much as I could do around 9:00. And that's what I realized I hadn't eaten since two and I was dying. All of a sudden I was wheezing and shaking and it was horrible. And the quickest thing I could make was the one minute Tikka masala And I toasted a pita and opened it up and filled it with the Tikka masala and just try to eat that as quickly as possible because I was shaking so hard. But I have that and then I had a little bowl of cereal and I felt a lot better.

I was texting Jess and telling her about my ridiculous evening and she was telling me that she was watching a movie and we were both wheezing apparently. Just having a time.

And then I would go and take a shower. And while I was in the shower I freaked myself out and thought I heard someone in the house but it was just the dishwasher. I came out in Sweet pea was being so cute so I knew that since he's not freaked out I don't need to be freaked out. And now we are in bed together. And I am very much ready to go to sleep. I'm going to go take some allergy medication and go to bed.

I have another full day tomorrow. I'm meeting Meghan in the morning for brunch and then I'm subbing at art with a heart. And then I don't know what I'll do after that. Maybe I'll take a nap. But I just hope that the stress that I'm feeling right now is meaningless because I know everything will be great. It's going to be a good day and I hope you all have a lovely evening. Sleep well everybody. Until next time.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I (30F) the asshole for possibly being part of the reason someone (50? F) got laid off? So there was a lady who started at my work about a year ago. We work in a field with a lot of deadlines, and we're in different departments. But the office space is one huge open area, so if people are talking loud enough we can hear them from across the room. Normally this isn't an issue, since most of our work is done on computers. A lot of the people we work with in her department actually work virtually, so we don't get to see them in person much. But she was in-office. We also had a working relationship with her predecessor that was solid enough that he'd trust us to do some things on our side of the project without checking in first. He also understood the sheer volume of deadlines we had to work with in a day, and if we ended up a little late on his assignment because the previous assignments were more chaotic than expected, he wouldn't get upset. She, on the other hand, did not understand what took us so long, or that there were deadlines that we absolutely had to get through before we could start on her projects. She would yell and swear loudly at her computer at the person assigned to her project for the night, especially if they made a mistake, or what she perceived as a mistake due to not understanding how our systems had to operate to meet these deadlines. One day I was assigned to her project, and I heard her yelling and swearing at me from her desk. I'd made a mistake while juggling multiple other projects, but it was something fixable well in advance of her deadline. She started telling me off on the chat program we use, as I tried to explain what happened. I took a screenshot of that conversation and showed it to my boss, because it wasn't the first time it had happened to someone working on her project, and frankly I was a bit tired of hearing her shout at us. But the next day I talked to some of my coworkers about it, and realized that she likely didn't know we actually worked in the same room, let alone the same building as her. So I came up and introduced myself.

And...things did seem to get a bit better after that. She stopped yelling at the computer as much.

Not completely, though. And she still yelled at the other people in her department if they screwed up. Or if they were running late. I actually bought noise cancelling headphones to help block her out. It got to the point where I started prioritizing helping her on her department's projects above others, just so my department wouldn't have to hear her swearing and complaining from across the room. I think she was called into HR once about it, but I don't know details there.

I did, however, talk to my coworkers more about her, and mention that I'd been focusing on these projects more than others just to try to stop the yelling. Which...the way this office works could easily have been passed on to upper management. Cut to a couple weeks ago when I got back from a short vacation, and I realized I hadn't seen her around for a couple weeks before or after that. I asked someone in that department if she was on vacation, and they said she'd gotten laid off. They didn't give any more details. I don't know if what I said had anything to do with her being laid off. I'm worried it might have. I didn't want her to lose her job, I just wanted the yelling to stop.

What are these acronyms?

[sunnyie-eve]

15 | Asking...

Series: Valentine Addams | Wednesday

Paring: (Xavier Thorpe x OFC Addams! Tyler Galpin x OFC Addams!)

Word Count: 1518

Warnings: conflicted feelings, arguing about a dance

14. It's Human | 16. Rave'N

Enid and a few girls decided we should all go dress shopping for the dance. They wanted us to wear white to match the theme but there was no way I'd wear a white dress. While I went to look at dresses with the girls, Wednesday whet off to see the sheriff. Barely into the shopping I got bored so I left to go to the Weathervane. 

As I walk in Tyler bumps into me on the way out, "Val." He smiles. 

"Tyler." I smile back. 

"What are you doing in town today?" He asks as we walk outside down the sidewalk. 

"A few girls are dress shopping. I got bored of watching them." I shrug my shoulders. 

"For the Rave'N this weekend. It was all the buzz at the Weathervane today." He says as we come to a stop. 

"Wow, everyone is really obsessed with this dance." I shake my head. 

"So, you're not going?" He asks. 

"Actually, I was forced to ask someone because of Wednesday." I roll my eyes still pissed at her. "

Sure, that happens. Who is it?" He asks eyeing me. 

"Xavier..." I watch his whole face change. 

"Got it. Hope you two have fun." He starts to walk away.

"Why are you upset? I literally said I was forced." I make him turn around. 

"I have a reason to be upset because you keep giving me these signals. I thought we liked each other, but then you pull something like this because you were forced?" He looks at me with so many different emotions. 

"Wednesday put me on the chopping block because he almost caught us snooping around his shit. She made something up on the spot and threw me under the bus she was driving. I didn't want to ask him to the stupid dance. If I was going to ask anyone it would have been you." I start to get frustrated. "I told you Xavier was missing something so that meant I don't like him more than a friend." I run my hands through my hair getting even more frustrated. "I still don't fully know feelings because I'm developing new ones I've never felt before until I met you. You make me feel so many things and it makes me feel like I'm losing my mind." I feel myself wanting to cry which I hated was a thing now when I feel super frustrated. 

Tyler walks up to me and stops right in front of me looking down at me, "You make me feel like I'm losing my mind as well." He takes a hold of one of my hands. 

"I'm sorry." I take my hand back and walk away confused wanting to run to the train station and lay down on the tracks.

-

I just end up walk back to school to clear my mind. "Miss Addams, a gift from your mother has arrived today. I sat it on your bed." Ms. Thornhill smiles at I pass her in the hall. 

"My mother sent me a gift? Thank you." I got to my room to see a box on the bed with a letter on top.

My dear, Valentine. I know the Rave'N will be coming up soon around this time. I have a feeling you'll end up going with a certain person or maybe just a friend. So I've taken the time to find you a perfect dress you would love. I didn't send your sister one because I know she would never go. And if I did send one she would even more think I was trying to change her. Love you my sweet little black rose.

I didn't want to open the box quite yet because I wanted it to be a surprise. I end up calling my mother with the crystal ball to thank her for the dress but I don't want to look at it till the dance. She was happy I was going but I told her Wednesday wasn't going to go which she had a feeling.

"We're going for a walk." Wednesday walks into my room. 

"A walk where?" I eye her. "The woods. Eugene is leading the way." She leaves so I get up from my desk following her. 

We end up at a cave that had the same circle spiral in the rocks. "It's definitely a match. What were you doing out here?" Wednesday asks him. 

"Collecting specimens. This place is ground zero for horny gypsy moths. You think it's in there?" Eugene asks. 

"Only one way to find out." She walks up to it and we go in. We see the floor covered in animal bones. 

"Check this out." Eugene flashes his light on shackles nailed into the wall with scratches marks around it. 

She walks towards something else while I touch the shackles. "Stop! Please leave me alone! Don't come near me! No!" A distorted voice screams getting deeper and their blurry body becomes the monster.

"Valentine, what did you see?" Wednesday looks at me. 

"That's the thing, I couldn't really see or hear. It was blurry but the person who's the monster didn't want to change they were forced by someone." I explain to her as she holds a claw. 

"I need to go back to the shed. I need something to compare this too. You don't look well. Eugene make sure she gets to her room okay." Wednesday leaves us so Eugene helps me.

As I lay in bed after taking something for my head I kept thinking about how there was two people we needed to find. Why would someone force someone into that monster? There was banging at the door making me jump in bed. "What the hell?" I get up walking to the door opening to see Xavier. 

"Did you only ask me to the Rave'N because you and Wednesday think I'm the monster? She heavily believes I'm the monster because of all those things I painted of the monster." He brushes past me coming into the room. 

"I don't think it's you." I tell him truthfully. 

"I don't know if I can believe you." He shakes his head. 

"All I want to know is how did you get the scratches and why paint all those? You're my friend Xavier, you can tell me. I was confused to see all that but I still don't think it's you." I walk away from the door.

"The creature has been haunting my dreams for weeks. I try to block it out but I can't. So I just paint it. The recent one, the claws reached out and took a swipe at me." He sits on my bed. "See that makes sense to me." I take a seat next to him. "You're sister doesn't think so." He messes with his hands. 

"Do you care what she thinks?" I laugh. 

"No, I care what you think." He looks at me. 

"Well, I still don't think it's you. I only will if there's hardcore evidence to support it." I chuckle. 

"You didn't want to ask me to the dance did you? You only did it to cover up you two were in the shed." His eyes scan my face so I nod my head, 

"She cornered me into asking you but I'll still go with a friend if you want me to. If you're upset about the whole thing I get it." I let him know.

"I'm hurt you didn't want to ask me originally but I was going to ask you, so yeah, I still want to go to the dance with you." He smiles. 

"Great, because my mom sent me my dress today but I don't want to see it till I get ready for the dance." I clap my hands and he leans over kissing me making me freeze in place. 

"Can't wait to see you in your dress tomorrow." He leaves my room. 

"I just called you a friend, dude." I wipe my mouth as I was left alone.

-

"Whose your date for the dance?" I ask Enid as we hangout in her room. 

"Lucas." She smiles, "It's to make Ajax jealous." She rolls her eyes. 

"But out of everyone, Lucas?" I give her a look. 

"He approached me to get back at someone too so why not." She shrugs her shoulders. 

"Your dress matches the theme." I say as she shows me her dress. 

"What dress did you end up getting?" She asks me but Wednesday jumps in. 

"She's not going to the dance anymore." She says making me look over at her. 

"Why do you say that?" I ask her. 

"Because Xavier knows the truth that you were forced to ask him." She turns to face me.

"I'm still going with him. And my mother sent me a dress. I still haven't looked at it. I want to be surprised when I put it on tonight." I tell both of them. 

"Why still go with him?" Wednesday asks me. 

"He's a friend still. Have fun doing whatever you and Eugene plan to do." I leave their room to go do whatever in my room.