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#natural cooling properties
cselandscapearchitect · 8 months
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Natural Turf vs. Artificial Grass: Battling the Urban Heat Island Effect in the Low Desert
The low desert region faces the challenges of the urban heat island effect, where urban areas experience significantly higher temperatures than surrounding rural areas due to human activities and the built environment. As we strive to mitigate this heat island effect, one key consideration is the choice between natural turf and artificial grass. Both options have their own advantages and…
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butchmarner · 3 months
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Look at my cool lesbian shirt with @morggo 's art.... this is the coolest shirt I've ever owned
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picnicbask3t · 1 year
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joe in twst thx to an idea @sleepy-meep gave me
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A Workshop for Creating Magical/ Fictional Crystals: A Guide from a Geologist
Hi folks, its me, here to talk about fictional writing again! Today I'm just tackling the idea of magical stones/mana stones by looking at existing minerals today and some neat properties that they have, and how you can apply these things to a fictional world. The goal is mainly to help you if you are stuck trying to come up with a unique magic system, or a unique identification/characteristic of your mineral.
First Things First: Mineral Shapes
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I am exhausted, petered out, down-right fatigued by seeing every mineral depicted with having the crystal structure of calcite and quartz. There are soooooo many cooler, more interesting crystal structures, don't you think you would stop and take a look at a perfect cube in nature? It is completely unsettling.
Second: Color
Color within minerals can either be really important, or not important at all! It is your choice to decide if color is going to be something that means something to your mineral. But what are some times when the color is important? Well.... there are some elements that are called chromophores, this classification just indicates that these elements, when present, will determine the color of whatever they are in. So, if you wanted to treat mana like a chromophore, you could say, "Oh everything that contains mana turns green!" This could mean that regardless of the mineral, if that mineral is a specific color, it means it contains mana. This concept is exciting because you can just stop here and use minerals that already exist! You can also use it as an indicator for a magical ore! Chromophores are typically metals, so if you are making a new metal weapon, making the ore of that metal a unique color would make a lot of sense!
However, your mineral can also just be every color of the rainbow like quartz and perhaps that's what makes identifying your mana stones elusive and create an illusion of scarcity that your character can solve.
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There are other things that can change the colors of minerals, like radiation damage, and electron exchange, but I think that is beyond what would be helpful! So lets talk about some unique color properties that happen in nature that seem magical in the first place! Maybe you don't need to design a mana stone, but you want a unique gemstone that only the royal family passes down or something (IDK).
The first one is the alexandrite effect! This is where a mineral can change color in natural light vs. incandescent light. (the mineral itself is not changing, but the lights contain different amounts of different colors that then get absorbed by the stone). Even if you don't use electricity in your fictional world, you could have the colors change in the presence of light magic. This could create fun misunderstandings about what the mineral is reacting to!
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Pleochroism
Pleochroism is something that most minerals have, it is frequently used to help identify minerals in thin sections, however minerals are usually not pleochroic enough for it to be visible to the naked eye! Pleochroism is just a fancy name to describe the change in how light is absorbed based on the angle of the mineral! So if you scroll up to the first image where I showed a lot of crystal shapes, most of them have angles where they are longer and shorter! This will effect the way light travels in the crystal. Tanzanite is a popular mineral that does this.
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Photochromism
This is when a mineral will change color (in a reversible way) when exposed to UV light (or sunlight), I am not going to go too into the details of why this is happening because it would require me to read some research papers and I just don't feel like it. The mineral that is best known for this is Hackmanite!
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Alright! These are all the really cool color effects that might inspire you or maybe not, but now I am going to talk about how you might find your minerals within a rock!
When I see a lot of magical caves/mines, typically I see them with some variation of a geode honestly, but most minerals are not found like that! Now I am sure most of you guys have seen a geode, so I will not really talk about those, but I will talk briefly about porphyroblasts which is when the mineral grows larger than the minerals around it, this happens in metamorphic minerals!
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sorry random stranger, but this is an image of garnets inside a finer-grained rock at gore mountain in New York!
Another way you might find minerals is in a pegmatite! This is when all minerals are really large! This is a formed from really slow crystalizing magma!
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But something else to think about is that your mineral might just be massive, it doesn't have to have distinct crystals, it may be similar to jadeite where small grains grow together which leaves it looking smooth and seamless! A note about all of these is that you would have to mine into the rock to find these, there would not be any natural caves in these rocks! Caves are only ever really formed in limestones and maybe marbles (rocks that react with acid).
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How can your characters identify these minerals?
Typically when you are out in the field you will look to see what type of rocks the minerals are found in (The overall texture of the rock will tell you how it formed). If you know how the rock formed, it will narrow down the amount of minerals you need to think about by quite a bit! Next, you are going to look closely at it and observe its crystal structure, does it have an obvious crystal? if so what is the general shape? If it is broken, how did it break? Did it fracture like glass or did it break along uniform planes. Some minerals have a thing called cleavage (breaks along planes of weakness). If a mineral exhibits this habit, it will again help narrow this down. Next we can look at color. Color can be misleading, because minerals like quartz can be any color imaginable, but minerals like olivine will always be green! The next thing your character can do is test for hardness, minerals all have a specific hardness that can help identify it as well.
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After you go through all of this, your mineral might have some special property! This could be magnetism, fluorescence, reactions to acid, or any of the color changing effects I mentioned above! Other than that, your character can take it back to a lab and do a number of things to identify it, but the most typical thing would be for them to make a thin section (very thin piece of the rock) and observe it under a cross polarized microscope!
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On that note folks! I hope this helped in some way in thinking of new magic mineral properties! I have other guides that explore some different fictional worldbuilding issues you might run into, but if you have any topics you would like me to cover please that I haven't mentioned already, let me know!
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paarksunghoon · 16 days
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DEEP HONEY | SUNGHOON
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SUMMARY: the last thing you want to do is interrupt sunghoon’s time with his friends, but your doting boyfriend has always said he’ll be there whenever you need him. when a shift at work leaves you hanging by a thread, he and his friends are there to patch your soul back up.
NOTES: felt some type of way and naturally i need a hug from sunghoon. best i can do is write about it.
PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader
WORD COUNT: 2.6K
WARNINGS: angst, typical rough day stuff and typos, probably.
MASTERLIST
***
Your car comes to a complete halt when you situate yourself on the curb of Lee Heeseung’s apartment. The rumble of the pavement beneath your tires ceases to amplify the slight movement that naturally shakes your car seats and you sit in the driver’s side like you’re a zombie.
The muggy atmosphere from the heat attempting to displace the freezing air makes your skin feel sticky and gross as you turn your engine off. The overhead lights temporarily blind you as you stare ahead into the dark night and feel the tension building up in your body.
Your jaw clenches and your cheeks become warm with the sheer amount of frustration seeping into your bones. The cold sweat you harbor makes you feel hot and freezing at the same time. The coolness of your glass window does nothing to quell your body’s temperature.
The familiar two-story house beside you is where Heeseung lives. He rents the bottom property and has lived with Park Jongseong ever since you all collectively started the last year of university.
You don’t necessarily want to be here. Coming to Heeseung’s apartment because you feel like you might combust at any minute seems like an invasion of privacy. Your boyfriend Sunghoon had let you know that he was sleeping over at his friends’ apartment tonight and you had no qualms with the proposition. He deserved to have his time with his friends too. Although it seems that your mind has its own agenda and you find yourself in front of Heeseung’s place in no time.
You step out of the car and lock it. Your feet carry you around the hood and you step onto the hard sidewalk with a slight wobble. The air is chilling, throwing a stark shiver down your spine as you huddle in your arms for warmth. The jacket you have sprawled on the backseat looks at you with concern.
You’re a step away from ringing the doorbell but your finger hovers the white button as tears well up in your eyes. The feeling of desperation and burden weigh on your chest as you listen to the muffled laughter that comes from Heeseung’s living room. Sunghoon hadn’t seen his friends in a few weeks between classes, work, and you. The last thing you want to do is impede on his time with his friends when you’ve spent the better half of this month glued to his side.
But you can’t help it. Your nose feels like it could be burning from the cold and the weather forces you to ring Heeseung’s doorbell when it ripples through your shirt. You hear him padding to the front door and can make out his figure from the bottom, his shadow blocking the light from inside.
Heeseung opens it just slightly ajar to assess who’s standing outside his apartment at this late hour. When he opens it, seeing you standing in the cold with red eyes and no jacket makes him panic.
“Y/N?” he asks. “What are you doing here?”
You think he might close the door with the look of confusion on his face but he opens it wider to allow you into his apartment. He shuts it quickly behind him and notices your chattering teeth, eyes softening at the sound when you look up at him. Heeseung watches your eyes begin to water and puts a hand on your upper back to soothe your emotions, but it makes you spill a few tears.
“I-I’m sorry for coming here,” you hiccup. “I didn’t know where else to go.”
“It’s okay, Y/N. You can always come over if you need something.”
You speak faster than you can think. “Today was so awful.”
Heeseung purses his lips and tells you to stay put. You watch him retreat into the living room and stare at the wall clock in front of you until you hear Heeseung say, “Hoon, your girl’s here.”
Sunghoon hears the worry in his friend’s voice because he stands up from the couch like he’s on a mission. With his eyebrows furrowed and heart beating in his chest, Sunghoon follows Heeseung to the front door and is immediately presented with you.
You look nothing like the happy-go-lucky girlfriend he said goodbye to before heading over to Heeseung’s. This morning, you’d woken up next to Sunghoon and he’d given you a tender kiss before heading to spend the day with his friends. Now, your eyes are swollen and your cheeks are stained with salty tears.
His heart plummets when he sees you standing in Heeseung’s doorway with no jacket on. You look helpless in a way he doesn’t see very often. Your knees buckle in your pants and the goosebumps on your arms are prominent to his eye.
Sunghoon wastes no time and envelopes you in a hug, pulling you into his chest until your face is situated in his neck.
“Baby?” he asks, feeling your hot breaths against his skin. “Talk to me. What happened? You’re so cold. Where’s your jacket? Did you bring one?”
His deep, honey-like voice that utter sweet concern only makes you cry harder. You try to keep your chokes and sobs as quiet as possible but the hiccups emitting from your throat make it impossible. You try to ignore the fact that Sunghoon’s friends can likely hear you weeping, instead focusing on your boyfriend’s warmth.
His arms encircle your body, one hand protectively around your waist and the other secured behind you. Sunghoon’s hands cup the back of your head and he strokes his fingers through your head lovingly.
“I had a bad day.” Your broken whispers makes Sunghoon’s heart sink even further. He pushes your hair out of the way and kisses your temple with plump lips.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he says. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Rethinking the events that led to your arrival at Heeseung’s place only fuels your tears and you shut your eyes, burying yourself further into your boyfriend’s neck.
Heeseung, helplessly standing around the corner, walks closer to tell him the two of you could use his bedroom. Sunghoon rubs the small of your back and slowly walks towards the room, guiding you inside without so much as a word spoken. Heeseung closes the door behind you two and Sunghoon immediately perches the two of you on the edge of his bed.
“My baby.” Sunghoon lifts your head and pushes the tears underneath your eyes away with the pads of his thumbs. “What’s got you upset, hm? Are you hurt?”
“No,” you choke. “I’m not hurt.”
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
Sunghoon pulls you into his chest and further onto Heeseung’s bed when you give into him. He lets you cry against him, not caring that his shirt is becoming damp as the seconds pass by. His palm soothes the entirety of your back and he kisses the crown of your head, periodically squeezing you tighter when his heart breaks at the sound of your sobs.
“Life is so hard,” you say into his chest. “I feel overwhelmed and scared.”
“Scared of what, baby?”
“I don’t know. Everything? I had the worst shift at work today. A customer ordered a hot coffee but I made it iced by accident and instead of letting me remake it for her, she involved my manager and was making a scene in front of everybody there.”
“I’m sorry.” Sunghoon whispers against your temple and kisses it again. “That’s frustrating.”
“My manager tried to get her to leave but she was pushy. Usually I could handle that but I’m overwhelmed with school and my senior project that I just broke down when the manager sent me home.”
“Your manager doesn’t think you’re at fault, right?”
“No,” you shake your head. “Nothing like that. He said I looked like I needed some rest and told me to take the rest of the night off.”
“Thank God.” He squeezes you tighter. “I’m sorry you had such a bad day. You shouldn’t have to put up with mean people who get mad at you for making a small mistake.”
“Everybody is so fucking mean, Hoon.” You roughly push away the tears from your eyes with the heel of your palm. “I’m tired of everybody expecting so much from me. Between work, school, and my parents asking me what job I’ll have after graduating, it’s all too much.”
Sunghoon coos. “You’re so precious, you know that? You’re dealing with so much and you’re allowed to cry about it. I’m sorry everything is affecting you like this.”
“Sorry for ruining your boys night,” you sniffle. “I feel awful that I took you away from your friends.”
Your boyfriend shakes his head. “Don’t be sorry. I’d come to you in a heartbeat if you called.”
His words only make you cry harder. Sunghoon is the perfect boyfriend. He dotes on you like you’re the only woman he’s ever loved in his entire life and lets you know how beautiful you are any chance he gets. He gets along with your friends and family, welcomes you into his own life, and makes you feel like you can achieve anything whether he’s in the picture or not.
Being with him has made you feel safer than you have in a long time. His arms provide the kind of comfort you’ve always been seeking and despite the amount of frustration and sadness in your body, it seems to be melting away with every kiss Sunghoon puts on your forehead.
Heeseung knocks gently and opens the door just slightly. You feel silly being held like a baby in front of Sunghoon’s friends who you’ve met only once before. It was at Heeseung’s house that you first met the three guys Sunghoon is closest to after they made an effort to invite you over to a night at the local dive bar before coming back to watch a marathon of Marvel movies. Your love for Iron Man catapulted the start of your friendship with Heeseung in particular and Sunghoon was starting to love how well you fit into his life.
“It’s been a while and I wanted to check in. You doin’ okay?”
You sniffle and hold onto Sunghoon’s arm. “Bad day. Everybody sucks.”
Heeseung laughs. “Preaching to the choir.” You immediately realize you neglected to take your shoes off when entering the apartment and scold yourself for bringing dirt onto his hardwood floors.
“Shit,” you say, pulling your legs higher so they’re farther from the surface. “I’m so sorry Heeseung. I’m sorry for barging in.”
He shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it. Take them off, I’ll put them by the door.”
You oblige. Sunghoon holds you to balance your body as you hand each sneaker to Heeseung, who doesn’t look at you weirdly or scold you for interrupting his time with your boyfriend. Instead, he smiles at you and lets you know Jongseong and Sim Jaeyun, another one of Sunghoon’s friends that you met during the movie night, are outside and concerned for you.
“We don’t have to go out if you don’t want to,” Sunghoon tells you as Heeseung closes the door behind him for a second time. “But they really like you and I know they care about you.”
“I only met them once,” you hiccup, toying with the hem attached to the bottom of his shirt. “How could they possibly like me?”
Sunghoon laughs and kisses your cheek. “I talk about you all the time. I’m pretty sure they’re sick of hearing me talk about you and would rather hang out with you instead.”
“You do?”
He nods. “Mhm. I have the best girlfriend in the world, you know. They had a lot of fun getting to know you and were planning on inviting you to a barbecue Jongseong’s having next weekend.”
“Really?”
Your doe-like eyes makes Sunghoon’s heart melt. He nods and kisses your nose. “Yes, baby. They love you. Not as much as I do, but a close second.” Hearing you laugh makes him breathe easier.
“I still feel bad for ruining your guys’ night,” you say with a pout.
Sunghoon eases your mind and presses a tender kiss to your lips to displace said pout. “We’ve all been there. If you’re uncomfortable, we can go back to your place and sleep?”
You shake your head. “This is your night. I don’t want to interrupt and make things awkward.”
“Why don’t we at least get you some water. You don’t have to say anything but at least drink something so you’re not dehydrated.” You don’t want to get up and face the embarrassment of the other three boys seeing you cry, but you know Sunghoon is right. After all the crying you’ve done, you’re feeling parched.
You nod and stand from him, all while he still has one hand in yours. Moments like this make you appreciate Sunghoon even more than you already do. He’s willing to do anything for you at the drop of a hat and it gives you butterflies when you remember this handsome, generous man is your boyfriend.
Jongseong and Jaeyun look at you with concerned eyes when you meet them outside. You try to speak but your mouth keeps opening and closing as you find the words to say.
“I’m okay,” you tell them. “And I’m sorry for ruining your night.”
Jongseong hands you a glass of water. “Don’t sweat it, Y/N. Everyone has bad days.”
“Yeah, but you guys haven’t seen Hoon in forever and this was supposed to be your weekend.” Your sincere apology and the cracks in your voice make Jaeyun’s eyes water too.
“It’s alright,” he tells you sincerely. “We love hanging out with you. You should stay and we can watch movies. We were gonna do that anyway.”
“I don’t want to intrude.”
“Jongseong and I want you to stay,” Heeseung says. The two of them nod. “You shouldn’t be alone when you feel like this.”
“Fuck,” you say, voice cracking to the point where it makes you laugh. The four boys laugh as well and feel the relief in the air around them. “You guys are too nice.”
“We were gonna order takeout too,” Jongseong says, pulling his phone out. “We were thinking maybe fried chicken but Hoon says you love Thai food. Why don’t we order stuff from the place around the block and eat it family style?”
“Oh, you don’t have to change it for me.”
Jongseong waves you off. “Nah. We all love Thai. Any excuse to eat it.”
“And don’t think about paying us back,” Jaeyun says with a genuine smile. “I’ll pay for it.”
“We’ll split it by four,” Heeseung adds.
Jongseong lets you put in your order and everybody else follows suit. Sunghoon has you tucked underneath his chin as the whole ordeal happens and kisses the side of your face every so often.
“Feel better?” He asks, mouth against your ear. His warm breath is comforting, as to remind you that he’ll always be there for you.
“Much better.” Your voice is no longer brittle from your cries. Sunghoon smiles.
“My sweet baby,” he coos. “You’re so pretty when you cry.”
“What about when I’m not crying?”
“Still pretty.” He squishes your cheeks with his hands and pressed a kiss to your fattened lips. “Adorable, even.”
Jaeyun looks at the two of you and laughs. He can only hope that he’ll feel like that with someone someday. It compels him to say something.
“You guys are stupid cute.”
Sunghoon says nothing. He smiles at his friend and squeezes you tighter. Having him to lean back on makes you feel like you might be the luckiest girl in the world.
***
comments and reblogs would be appreciated! xx
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OKAY THIS ARTICLE IS SO COOL
I'm going to try to explain this in a comprehensible way, because honestly it's wild to wrap your head around even for me, who has a degree in chemistry. But bear with me.
Okay, so. Solids, right? They are rigid enough to hold their shape, but aside from that they are quite variable. Some solids are hard, others are soft, some are brittle or rubbery or malleable. So what determines these qualities? And what creates the rigid structure that makes a solid a solid? Most people would tell you that it depends on the atoms that make up the solid, and the bonds between those atoms. Rubber is flexible because of the polymers it's made of, steel is strong because of the metallic bonds between its atoms. And this applies to all solids. Or so everybody thought.
A paper published in the journal Nature has discovered that biological materials such as wood, fungi, cotton, hair, and anything else that can respond to the humidity in the environment may be composed of a new class of matter dubbed "hydration solids". That's because the rigidity and solidness of the materials doesn't actually come from the atoms and bonds, but from the water molecules hanging out in between.
So basically, try to imagine a hydration solid as a bunch of balloons taped together to form a giant cube, with the actual balloon part representing the atoms and bonds of the material, and the air filling the balloons as the water in the pores of the solid. What makes this "solid" cube shaped? It's not because of the rubber at all, but the air inside. If you took out all the air from inside the balloons, the structure wouldn't be able to hold its shape.
Ozger Sahin, one of the paper's authors, said
"When we take a walk in the woods, we think of the trees and plants around us as typical solids. This research shows that we should really think of those trees and plants as towers of water holding sugars and proteins in place. It's really water's world."
And the great thing about this discovery (and one of the reasons to support its validity) is that thinking about hydration solids this way makes the math so so so much easier. Before this, if you wanted to calculate how water interacts with organic matter, you would need advanced computer simulations. Now, there are simple equations that you can do in your head. Being able to calculate a material's properties using basic physics principles is a really big deal, because so far we have only been able to do that with gasses (PV=nRT anyone?). Expanding that to a group that encompasses 50-90% of the biological world around us is huge.
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bi-writes · 1 month
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whats wrong with ai?? genuinely curious <3
okay let's break it down. i'm an engineer, so i'm going to come at you from a perspective that may be different than someone else's.
i don't hate ai in every aspect. in theory, there are a lot of instances where, in fact, ai can help us do things a lot better without. here's a few examples:
ai detecting cancer
ai sorting recycling
some practical housekeeping that gemini (google ai) can do
all of the above examples are ways in which ai works with humans to do things in parallel with us. it's not overstepping--it's sorting, using pixels at a micro-level to detect abnormalities that we as humans can not, fixing a list. these are all really small, helpful ways that ai can work with us.
everything else about ai works against us. in general, ai is a huge consumer of natural resources. every prompt that you put into character.ai, chatgpt? this wastes water + energy. it's not free. a machine somewhere in the world has to swallow your prompt, call on a model to feed data into it and process more data, and then has to generate an answer for you all in a relatively short amount of time.
that is crazy expensive. someone is paying for that, and if it isn't you with your own money, it's the strain on the power grid, the water that cools the computers, the A/C that cools the data centers. and you aren't the only person using ai. chatgpt alone gets millions of users every single day, with probably thousands of prompts per second, so multiply your personal consumption by millions, and you can start to see how the picture is becoming overwhelming.
that is energy consumption alone. we haven't even talked about how problematic ai is ethically. there is currently no regulation in the united states about how ai should be developed, deployed, or used.
what does this mean for you?
it means that anything you post online is subject to data mining by an ai model (because why would they need to ask if there's no laws to stop them? wtf does it matter what it means to you to some idiot software engineer in the back room of an office making 3x your salary?). oh, that little fic you posted to wattpad that got a lot of attention? well now it's being used to teach ai how to write. oh, that sketch you made using adobe that you want to sell? adobe didn't tell you that anything you save to the cloud is now subject to being used for their ai models, so now your art is being replicated to generate ai images in photoshop, without crediting you (they have since said they don't do this...but privacy policies were never made to be human-readable, and i can't imagine they are the only company to sneakily try this). oh, your apartment just installed a new system that will use facial recognition to let their residents inside? oh, they didn't train their model with anyone but white people, so now all the black people living in that apartment building can't get into their homes. oh, you want to apply for a new job? the ai model that scans resumes learned from historical data that more men work that role than women (so the model basically thinks men are better than women), so now your resume is getting thrown out because you're a woman.
ai learns from data. and data is flawed. data is human. and as humans, we are racist, homophobic, misogynistic, transphobic, divided. so the ai models we train will learn from this. ai learns from people's creative works--their personal and artistic property. and now it's scrambling them all up to spit out generated images and written works that no one would ever want to read (because it's no longer a labor of love), and they're using that to make money. they're profiting off of people, and there's no one to stop them. they're also using generated images as marketing tools, to trick idiots on facebook, to make it so hard to be media literate that we have to question every single thing we see because now we don't know what's real and what's not.
the problem with ai is that it's doing more harm than good. and we as a society aren't doing our due diligence to understand the unintended consequences of it all. we aren't angry enough. we're too scared of stifling innovation that we're letting it regulate itself (aka letting companies decide), which has never been a good idea. we see it do one cool thing, and somehow that makes up for all the rest of the bullshit?
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nsharks · 7 months
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bleeding blue | apocalypse au
part nineteen —other parts
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pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!reader words: 3k tags: death. blood. cannibalism mention. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. there will be sex but it isn’t here yet. slow burn!!! enemies to lovers. summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.
The cool paste feels tingly on your skin as you rub it against your bruised stomach, wincing. Christ. Maybe Ghost was right to think he might break you. Beneath the mottled patchwork, another kind of pain stirs— your muscles are growing. Firm and tight. The only soft parts of you left are your breasts and your ass. Gently applying the paste to a nasty purple one on your left cheek, you curiously pinch the sore flesh between your fingers. Scratch that. Even your ass is firming up. 
Arnica has healing properties. Yesterday, you found a patch of it with Blue and created a salve with some water. You already applied some last night before bed. Whether or not it’s helping probably doesn't mean much when new ones are about to be added; still, the placebo effect brings some comfort.
You're still massaging your backside when the bathroom door groans beneath a heavy fist. 
"Hurry up. Grab your bow."
“Shit.” You startle, almost dropping the salve. "Uh, coming.”
Chucking on a clean shirt and your old pair of jeans, you pad out of the bathroom, ignoring the cry of your joints. Ghost is outside waiting for you. Wait— bow? Confusion delivers an uptick to your pulse; you never bring your bow to train.
“What’s going on?”
"The air," he replies in a flat tone.
The stale smell offers enough explanation. You cringe. "Should we split up?"
He shakes his head and nods towards the direction the gentle breeze is rolling in. "No need. It's coming from this way."
In the violet wash of morning, you trail beside him over tall grasses and scattered groundhog burrows as the air leads the way, luring you opposite the clearing where you train. There haven't been any Greys since the one you burned together. For the past few weeks, you'd almost forgotten about their existence— a pleasant naivety for once. 
Neither of you bothers with much small talk. He asks if you're sore, probably noticing how stiff you are, and you answer honestly. That's it.
You keep your attention strictly on the wood bow molded into your palm and the slight rustling of leaves all around you, scanning for signs of anything astray. You don't look at Ghost, even when you feel his eyes flicker to the side of your head. Staring at him for even a second longer than necessary rouses something in your gut that was once easy to label as fear; now you don't know what to call it.
He is wearing thicker clothes today, the intimidating vest stocked with ammo glued to his chest. You'd gotten used to his more casual wardrobe of gym shorts and hoodies. They make him look... softer, almost. A little less like a death omen. Though, you sincerely doubt there are any soft parts of Ghost left under all that gear, given the rigid planes you felt beneath your hands when you—
"There."
You snap your gaze in the direction Ghost is pointing at.
At first, you don't see anything.
Then, squinting, you make out a red color far too metallic to naturally sprout among the conifers. 
An arrow is urgently slotted on the bowstring as the two of you head towards it, your brows tightly knitted. You've been this way a few times and never saw a— is that a red car?— before. Closing in, your suspicions are confirmed when a stroke of sunlight bounces off the metal bumper. The patchy sedan is tucked within a bush, tail-end sticking out, with half-flat tires resting on corroded rims. Shadows of movement dance behind the tinted windows, too disjointed to be natural.
"What the fuck?" you mutter under your breath, boots scuffing over a long-faded gravel pathway that is now shrouded in weeds. The car must've been following it before winding up in the bush— the occupants no longer human enough to drive.
"They... they must have just turned while they were driving," you think aloud. "When did this even get here?"
"Maybe during the night," Ghost mutters.
He paces forward and swings open the passenger door. A string of moans is released as a Grey lurches within the confinements of the seatbelt, but he quickly silences it with a bullet to the forehead, causing it to flop sideways out of the car. Maybe just a day ago, it was a young man. His hair is fully intact and he's wearing a blue shirt with the Chelsea Football Club logo on the back.
"I wonder why they were driving this way to begin with," you say quietly, stomach rolling.
In the driver's seat is the slumped-over corpse of an older man, having died from so many bite wounds before the infection could take hold. The early stages of decomposition smell almost worse than the infection and you have to breathe through your mouth as you head for the back door. 
"There's another here I think."
You're ready to shoot and put whoever it once was out of their misery when you pry open the door, but the sight of a small body wriggling around makes you freeze. Curled up against the faded leather is an infected boy, no older than eight or nine. His eyes are all white except for the outer rim where a few vessels are still filled with red blood. Your fingertips dig fiercely into the frame of the door as you stare down at him; his soft brown hair, his small hands, his Minecraft shirt. He whimpers and tries to claw at you, mouth hung open in mindless hunger.
The feeling that washes over you is hot and cold at the same time. It's not the first or last time you've seen an infected child, so you don't know why the sight traps you for a few heartbeats.
A voice emerges beside you. "It's not a kid anymore."
You almost forgot Ghost was there. Your teeth clench. "Yeah, I know."
You feel his eyes burning into you. Your fingers tighten and untighten around the arrow's stem as you aim. 
"Hone it, Twix— the anger."
The tension in your jaw releases at the same time as your arrow snaps forward, cutting through the boy's skull and driving his limp body down to the car floor.
“You good?”
You forcefully swallow and look away, giving Ghost a short nod. "Guess that's all of them."
He slowly nods in agreement, studying you, but all he says is, "For now."
“Don’t you think it’s strange?”
“Seen stranger things over the years,” he says. “It seems like they were headed somewhere, maybe needed a new place to settle, and one of them got bit. Infected the others.”
You nod, thinking it over. “What about the car?"
"No fuel left, so it's pretty useless." Rifle still in his grip, he moves around to the hood and props it open. "Might have some parts I can use, though."
While he scavenges for gears that aren't rusted beyond functionality, you take a look at their belongings. There is an empty bottle of whiskey in the cupholder. In the boy's lap is a stuffed tiger that you assume was once white, but now it's a worn of grey. You carefully shift his corpse and take it.
"I have a friend who might be able to care of this for you."
In the trunk, at least, you find some tripwire. 
Dragging the two adult bodies back to the trench for burning is your 'strength' training for the day. Since they haven't decomposed much yet, they're heavy; you go back and forth, taking one at a time. Ghost carries the small one over his shoulder. After the flames snuff out the smell of rot, he relieves you, claiming he has other shit to take care of—more traps to set with the newfound tripwire.
"Hey. Would you like this?" you ask Blue when she's up, handing her the tiger. 
"I'm kinda too old for dolls, Twix." She must see the expression on your face because she shakes her head and disappears into her room for a minute before coming out with a teddy bear. "My mom gave me this one when I was a baby and it just sits on my bed by itself, but now it can have a friend."
You smile and nod. "Yeah, okay."
The day is spent playing board games with her. When she notices how sore you are, she offers an exclusive massage from Grim, who hops over your back and legs as you relax face-down on the couch. However, even with the honorary treatment, the aching lingers. 
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"Auntie, I'm over here!"
In a violet-tinted field, you search for the voice.
It's barren and hazy, with no hard edges or places for a little boy to hide; so why is it so hard to find him? You call his name. You wander around, aimless, until you catch a familiar whiff of baked cinnamon and fresh laundry. This way. He's this way. You start running fervently. When a small hand tugs at yours, you whip around and try to grab him, but the soft touch dissolves through your fingers like ash. 
When you wake up, there's a hand on your back and blood on your tongue, evidence that you'd bitten through it during your sleep. The taste is quickly replaced with bile as you launch up, grabbing the sleeve of someone's shirt.
"Oh no, you don't."
The hand moves to your hair, wrapping it around in a fistful before forcing your head to tilt down. A bucket is tucked beneath your chin. You vomit into it, the cool metal rim hissing against your fingertips. Again and again. When it's all out, your throat feels like sandpaper. 
"Done?"
The dark room surrounds you; the perfect place to hide what you know must be a ghastly look on your face. Awareness creeps in, and you're not thrilled by the fact that you've thrown up in front of him twice now. Without looking up at the white skull you know is there, you nod.
Wordlessly, he takes out a cigarette and lighter. You hear a deep inhale. See the dull glow of the flame. Then, he passes it to you and leaves.
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"You look like shit today."
You can't even be offended, fully aware of the purple painted beneath your eyes. One look at you quirks his brow up in that annoying mannerism of his.
You offer a tight-lipped simper, mumbling. "At least I can always count on you for brutal honesty."
"Good trait to look for in an ally." He throws the gauze at you and you begin wrapping up. "I don't suppose it has anything to do with the fact you nearly ruined another shirt of mine last night."
You tie off the gauze and glance up. "Look, I'm s—" you stop yourself, "I mean, I'm not sorry, because you wanted my box open so now it's open. You already knew the potential consequences."
"Try opening it without emptying your stomach next time."
You flash him a look. "I think I miss when you pretended I didn't exist."
"And I miss getting a full night of sleep."
"Can we just get started? I'm ready."
Ghost keeps his eyes on you as he motions a fisted hand. "As you wish."
When the familiar dance begins, and adrenaline ripples up your spine, you realize that you missed this yesterday. The rest felt good, but this— the thrill of seeing Ghost start to get as worked up as you, the sweat stains on his shirt matching your own... it is something you itch for these days. 
You get a few hits in that have your ego swelling. But then— the rough night catches up with you after half an hour of wordless sparring. Your breathing grows labored, while his is barely winded.
"Tired yet?" he asks.
"No," you say, but he calls you out immediately.
"You're a terrible liar," he reminds you. A few more swings have your lungs burning as you dodge until one finally catches up with you, and whatever healing your homemade salve has done is erased by a fresh layer of pain. 
As you clutch your side, he changes the subject. "Are you going to tell me what it was about then?"
"What what was about?"
"Whatever was making you whimper in your sleep."
Your face twists. "I wasn't 'whimpering'."
"Fine, then. Crying," he corrects plainly.
You sigh through your nose, averting your gaze only for a moment, then focusing back on him before he can strike you again. His words hang in the air, ignored, as you jab an elbow toward his ribs. He grabs you by the knob of it and pulls you unnecessarily close to his chest. When you try to wriggle free by placing a hand on his chest, he fists your hair, which has slipped out of a bun into a haphazard ponytail, and tugs hard enough to force your eyes up to his.
His gaze is demanding but his voice is light— a mere breath over your forehead. "Tell me why someone who has seen plenty of infected kids by now seemed so bothered by the one she saw yesterday. He reminded you of someone, didn't he?"
The mention of it makes you snap. "Stop."
"Stop what?"
"Trying to act like you know anything about me."
"I know enough. You are easy to read."
So that feeling you get when he looks at you isn't just in your head; he truly can see through. Your nails dig into your palm. "There's no need to read me. We're not friends. We're just... allies, or whatever."
"Or whatever," he repeats thoughtfully, tasting the words. "You talk like a teenager."
"Compared to you I might as well be," you retort.
"Jesus." He chuffs out an exhale, eyes flickering down for a moment before returning up to yours, narrowing. "Let's not change the subject here." 
"Fine. Take this stupid Halloween mask off," you lift the hand on his chest up to the hem of his balaclava, feeling how weighted the fabric is with sweat. "And I will tell you all about it."
His jaw flexes before he gently guides your hand away. "Tempting offer, but I'll pass."
You refuse to acknowledge the tinge of embarrassment at his dismissal and inch back as far as the hand on your hair will allow. The close proximity, or harsh sun, is making it hard to breathe. "Well, it's not fair for you to ask me shit about my life when you don't even let me see your face."
"I never claimed to be fair." 
"I promise I won't vomit no matter how ugly you are. I've seen worse things out here."
His hand tightens. "I think I miss when you were scared of me. Less mouthy back then."
"Well, I'm not anymore."
"No?" He flips you around so your back is against him, one hand settling on the toned curve of your hip. His voice lowers to your ear. "Maybe I need to fix that."
An unwelcomed shiver courses through you. He lets go. A wristbone nudges against your spine, shoving you forward. Irritation simmers in your veins when his remark finally registers, and you whirl around, readying your stance. 
"If you even think about threatening me after I explicitly asked you not to, then I would suggest sleeping with a knife tonight."
"Who's threatening who, Twix?" He gives a low chuckle. "Relax. I'm sure I could handle you in my sleep, anyway."
He's egging you on; you know it. And yet, you stubbornly take the bait. His knee— the right one. That's where you got him last time that made him falter. Maybe an old injury. But when you swing a boot at it, he expects your attempt, knocking you away by the ankle. 
"Ah. Eager to get me beneath you again?"
Pink sears your cheeks as you wipe a trickle of sweat from your forehead. "I'm eager to humble you for once."
"Might need to keep your dinner down to do that."
You grit your teeth. So maybe he did allow it last time. The realization darts your eyes to his wide stance, searching for an idea. Without second-guessing yourself, you kick at the other knee. He must find your second attempt amusing because he easily predicts it, but before he can catch your leg, you snap it back and drop yourself to the ground.
The brief distraction allows the second of time needed to fit yourself between his legs. You're slim enough to push through, kicking at the inside of both knees once you're on the other side. His legs buckle, and you reach up to pull his arm, finishing the job.
Once he's down, you scramble to get on top, not caring if your boot kicks his face in the process. You grab both of his wrists and bring them above his head, but it's impossible to wrap your fingers all the way around them. Instead, you lace them through his fingers, breathing hard in his face as your breasts meld against the solid heat of him.
"Did you allow that?" 
His voice is rougher than you've ever heard it. "No."
Your lips furl. "Good."
A dark gleam passes through his dilated pupils that makes your head fuzzy. You let go of his hands. Immediately, they gravitate to your hips again, thumbs fiercely pressing into the sliver of skin exposed from where your shirt rides up. You don't move even an inch, frozen in place as you stare down at where he grips you against him. That feeling in your gut deepens and spreads. It is hard to pinpoint—so insane and foreign yet familiar at the same time—but one thing is certain: it begins and ends where his rough skin touches yours.
Before you can figure anything else out, a scream shatters the air, and Ghost rips you off of him in one swift movement. 
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urhoneycombwitch · 9 months
Text
I know what they call you.
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You’re a little lost in your head. Eddie wants to find you. shy!reader
foreword: The healing properties of good head <333 Anyways I labeled this R “shy” but she’s more… introverted? Reserved? this one goes out to the weird and off-putting girlies who have a lot to say but are kinda quiet instead. Timeline may be a bit wibbly but designed it to be early 4th-season era, with R (early 20s) having played an undetermined part in the various Upside Down battles from seasons previous. Loosely based on this anon every1 say thank you anon!
cw: alcohol/weed used as a social crutch, R is hassled by a guy at a party (but her boys back her up), brief vomit mention, implied bad home life for R, light SH by way of tight grip, PTSD, R has breasts+V, praise kink, oral (R receiving), one (1) spank, multiple orgasms (R), soft dom!eddie, overstim, coming in pants (E)
wc: 11k
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It’s spring break, 1986, and you’re cursing the name of your so-called “best friend” Robin Buckley.
You didn’t even want to go to this stupid kegger in the first place, arguing with her the whole ride over from Steve’s backseat.
“Don’t you think it’s totally lame that you’re basically being chaperoned by two gap-year losers?” you’d said, leaning forward to rest your elbows on the console, seatbelt pulling taut across your Rolling Stones tee. “You’re a big girl, Robin, you don’t need Steve and me to babysit you anymore.”
Robin began protesting but Steve interrupted, tapping at your forearms without looking away from the road- “Sit back, wouldja, that’s not safe. And for the record, it’d only be lame if we were, like, thirty and still going to high school kickbacks. Gap-year drinking parties are a rite of passage.”
You’d sat back against your seat with a huff, arms crossed, unconvinced until Robin turned those big pleading eyes your way over the back of her seat. “You wanna talk about lame? Lame is me getting anywhere within a 60-foot radius of Vickie. I am totally hopeless around that absolute beauty.”
She’d twisted in her seat and reached for your hand, and you gave it to her grudgingly (the two of you ignoring another of Steve’s gripe about vehicular safety) as she said, “You’re like, the best wingwoman I’ve ever met. Please come to the party and help me avoid the natural disaster that is me running my mouth.”
Robin wasn’t just being generous- you were a killer third wheel. Especially when alcohol was involved: the walls that you naturally upheld around your introverted demeanor by day turned liquid as whiskey by night, often scoring you major cool points with your friends for things you barely remembered doing the day after. 
So you’d relented, and in turn resolved to get as drunk as possible as quickly as possible (in the name of Robin’s aid, of course), but turns out your best friend didn’t even need your help in the first place; within 5 minutes of setting foot in the crammed house party Robin won a spot right next to Vickie on the living room couch, starry-eyed gaze saved only for the redhead that bore no room for your intervention.
Three shots ago, the situation would have struck you as funny, but it’s been a lonely time (what with Steve abandoning you, too, in favor of chatting up some college blonde); drifting from packed room to packed room, sneakers sticking to the floorboards, winding through throngs of sweaty dancing students just to keep on top of your alcohol consumption.
Kind of like hunting in the wild, you muse, leaned against a wall with red solo cup in hand. Flirt with Amy Thacker and her low-cut blouse to access the watering hole (Mystery Punch, green both in color and flavor); let Lenny Baker put his paws on your waist to gain entry to the standing liquor cabinet. The stuff of nature docs.
If this dimly-lit Hawkins party is the savanna, then you are the antelope- grazing on snacks, never staying in one spot for too long, minding your own business and staying way the hell away from the lion’s den (the group of jocks in Hawkins Tigers polos).
Unfortunately, you push off the wall in search of a refill at the same time Lenny Baker decides to sidle up to you, nearly knocking the cup from your grasp when he bends his thick head to shout in your ear above the music. 
“Great party, right?” His arms are crossed above his tank of a chest, blocking you from a smooth exit via the kitchen archway.
“If you’re into drunk teens, I guess,” you say back, pointedly, licking a stripe up your wrist from where the punch had sloshed onto your bare arm. 
When you look back up Lenny’s still standing there, watching you with a hungry edge that’s starting to make your well-honed antelope-sense tingle. As you not-so-subtly cast your glance around for Steve, Lenny leans in again, close enough to give you a sour whiff of his breath. “I’m legal, if that’s what’s got your panties in a twist. And what’s wrong with having some fun?”
“I’m not into having fun with douchebags who ‘roid away their remaining brain cells to bully my friends,” you retort, flatly. You doubt this guy knows you’re connected to the Hellfire group (de facto sitter, second only to Steve), but the insult seems to land anyways. 
Lenny scoffs, going for a low blow to offset the sting of his bruised ego- “If you’re trying to play the part of slut, you were doing a way better job earlier.”
What the meathead hasn’t picked up on yet is your absolute lack of care about him- or anyone else at this stupid fucking party, for that matter. Besides Robin and Steve, obviously, but they’re equally indisposed at the moment. You’re feeling bold enough that you could play dirty: throw the dregs of your drink in his face, make a real scene- but the shots from earlier are hitting you sideways and you’re not entirely confident in your ability to multitask. 
So instead, with a wink, you tell him, “At least this slut knows when to quit,” and turn on your heel, abandoning the kitchen escape route for a closer door that leads to the back porch.
You suck in lungfuls of cool night air, trying to clear the fuzz of booze from your vision. When you don’t hear any angry footsteps following in your wake, you sink against the wooden bannister and tip back the last of your drink in one swallow. Maybe Steve doubled back to the car…?
With your empty cup left neatly on the railing, you set off down the couple of steps that separate you from the grass, except the toe of your shoe catches on a hidden groove in the wood, and nothing is within reach to grab onto as you trip and begin to fall.
The stumble should have ended with you facedown in the dirt, but something- someone- solid breaks your downward path, catching the upper half of your body in a sturdy hold even as your legs twist around themselves.
“Whoa, whoa, hey, I gotcha. You okay?”
The voice is instantly familiar, one that you’ve heard ringing out from underneath the drama room door on countless occasions as you’ve waited on your various child wards to wrap up their D&D sessions.
Eddie Munson is holding you in his leather-clad arms, larger than life with that big cloud of hair and doe-eyed gaze matching yours. He helps you stand, properly, dropping his hands once you’re stabilized and taking the warmth of his palms with him. 
“You okay?” he asks again, tilting his head, looking at you with fresh concern from under that mop of bangs. “Looks like you had a lot to drink.”
“Thanks, Dad,” you drawl, bravado flooding back in. “Am I really gonna get a fucking lecture on drinking from my local drug dealer?”
Instead of rising to the bait or bristling at your tone, Eddie grins- delighted, wolfish- before letting out a low whistle. “Who coulda guessed: resident Shy Girl has a mouth on her.”
You twist said mouth into your own smile, one that you hope is coy and charming and not dorkily lopsided (because you stopped being able to feel your face after that last drink), and coo, “You thinkin’ about my mouth, Munson?”
He laughs- a full, vibrant sound that lights up the night. There’s a flutter in your ribcage, knocking up a frenzy at the noise, like it wants to get out and at him, but you tamp it down and play it cool.
“You’ve only seen me in the cold, unforgiving light of day,” you continue, as Eddie rifles through his pockets, surfacing with a pack of cigs, eye contact yet to be broken. “My nighttime alter ego is a real riot, all liquored up.”
“Well, I happen to think you’re a riot in the sober light of day, too.” Eddie shrugs a shoulder as he flips the lid of the cigarette box.
You’re unsure if he’s messing with you- he’s gotta be, right? The only meaningful interaction you two have had in the past handful of years has been through the courtesy of the children in your respective care- a few surface-level conversations during carpool pickup, some flirting on his end that you’ve always been too skittish to return. 
Well, until now, you guess. Maybe this is a good thing, him seeing you like this- it’ll either scare him away, or you’ll finally make good on the quiet crush you’ve been harboring.
You’re about to speak again when the porch door opens with a bang; you and Eddie swivel at the same time to see Lenny clomping noisily towards the steps, voice booming out over the thrum of bass back inside- “This freak bothering you?”
You look between the metalhead and the jock, eyes wide and mocking as you call back, “No, but you’re starting to!”
“Jesus, talk about poking the bear,” you hear Eddie mutter behind you, but your focus is taken up by the fact that Lenny is tromping down the steps and reaching out to grab your upper arm, his cold and clammy palm taking up a sizeable amount of space.
You can feel that rage, simmering and easily accessed, start to crawl over your skin. You stand your ground in the face of someone much larger than you, sneakers planted firmly, chin tilted in defiance- I’ve killed monsters in alternate dimensions, asswipe. You might’ve scared me back in high school but now I dare you to fuck with me. 
Before Eddie can jump to your defense, you’re already going in for the bite, voice dripping with derisiveness. “So glad your right hand found its way off your dick for a change, Len. How about you do me one better and take it far, far away from here?”
Lenny’s face is almost purple with anger as his grip tightens, and you feel Eddie moving in at your back- to do what exactly, hard to say, ‘cuz Lenny’s got about 60 pounds on the lanky DM- but just as fast as the tension has ramped up, it gets diffused with the arrival of one Steve Harrington from around the corner of the house.
He cuts a smooth path through the grass to your other side, Robin’s sweater slung over one arm, twirling his car keys in neat loops around his finger, boasting a casual demeanor that doesn’t match up with the steely look he’s giving Lenny. “You heard the girl, Baker. Time to am-scray.”
Whether it’s the rumors of Steve’s nail bat or the manic look in your eyes or the fact that he’s outnumbered, Lenny’s got plenty of reason now to drop your arm. 
Which he does, spitting one last “bitch” at you before hulking off into the night.
The anger in you recedes like a wave. You breathe out a dry laugh, then turn back to the boys, clasping your hands over your heart with faux-dopeyness. “My heroes. How will I ever repay you?”
“Shutting up, for a change, would be a great start,” Steve grouses over the sound of Eddie’s cackles.
“Holy shit. Can’t believe your girl’s feistiness almost landed me in the hospital.” Eddie shakes his head, plucking a cigarette out and sticking it between his plush lips.
“She’s not my girl,” Steve says, even as you wind your arms around his chest from behind, tucking your chin over his shoulder. “She is, unfortunately, my problem.”
“I love when you two talk about me like I’m not here.” You simper at Eddie from your draped position.
He’s watching you with a fondness that feels overly familiar, through the haze of smoke streaming from his nostrils as you pat the chest beneath your hands- “Don’t worry about ol’ Stevie boy. He’s turned into quite the good guard dog after the whole Russian mall takeover last year.”
“Aaaaand that’s enough talking from you,” Steve says firmly, twisting out of your arms and putting his own around your waist. “Say goodbye to your new buddy, we’ve got a Robin to collect.”
As Steve steers you towards the direction of his car you wave at Eddie, a motion that he returns, his rings glinting in the porch light.
“Christ, you really are somethin’ else with some drinks in you,'' Steve fusses, helping you into the backseat, hand shooting up to block the door frame before your head can collide with the metal. “Did you seriously have to bring up the Russians?”
“He probably thought it was a joke, Steve,” you say, exasperated and fighting the twisted middle seatbelt with uncoordinated hands. “You know… those things that you tell people when you wanna get in their pants?”
The crack was aimed at Steve’s recent string of strike-outs in the dating department, but he throws it back at you. “You’re trying to get in Eddie Munson’s pants?”
“No,” you sputter, indignant and feeling suddenly too hot. 
Steve knocks your still-struggling hands from the belt, clicking you in himself, before pointing an accusatory finger in your face. “Stay here while I get Robin, and no throwing up in the Beemer.”
He shuts the door, Robin’s sweatshirt hanging from one shoulder while he stalks back into the house. 
You let your head fall back against the seat and close your eyes, bright cherry embers of cigarettes between lush-lipped curves dancing behind the dark of your lids. 
___
You manage to avoid throwing up in the BMW, saving the worst of it for the downstairs toilet of the Harrington house after Steve drags you and Robin indoors. Once your body is purged of the spirits, you collapse into your usual side of the guest bed, sweaty and exhausted, murmuring an apology to Robin who squeaks at the rocking movement of the mattress. In a few minutes, you’re lulled to sleep by the gentle snores of your best friend.
The morning sun is a very rude awakening, Robin apparently having forgotten to close the blinds before leaving with Steve for their shifts at Family Video. There’s a full glass of water on the bedside table and a few loose Tylenol tablets, the word “DRINK” sprawled on a sticky note in Steve’s handwriting.
You wince, down the meds along with half the water, and start the search for your sneakers.
When you’d signed up to protect a bunch of teens at the end of the world awhile back, it had seemed like a one-time gig. But now, here you were a few years later, loading yourself into your curb-parked junker to willingly cart around the same kids.
While wearing yesterday’s clothes. Even with the sprays of cologne that you’d stolen from Steve’s dresser, you’re pretty sure you’ll be fooling no one.
Evidenced by your first stop in east Hawkins for Dustin Henderson, who clambers into the front seat with a scathing appraisal. “Rough night?”
“You could say that,” you reply, shifting the gear to drive and grimacing at the subsequent squeal of metal that pierces into your left temple. “Learn from my mistakes as a washed-up twenty-something and cool it on the teen drinking, all right?”
“Washed up though you may be,” Dustin intones sagely, digging through his backpack and producing two brown-paper bundles, “you are now one Claudia Henderson Breakfast Sandwich Deluxe richer.”
You take the proffered sandwich gratefully, steering with one hand to peel back the oil-stained paper from the still-warm bread. “God. Is your mom looking to adopt?”
“She’s kind of got the perfect child already, but I’ll keep my ear to the ground for ya,” Dustin says around a mouthful of cheese and egg.
The solid breakfast helps your stomach ease back into a place of normality, but with your next stop adding two more kids to the mix, the rowdy bickering that follows puts that Tylenol to work.
“You’re an idiot,” Max is saying to Lucas over the sound of his indignation in the back seat. “You seriously think Indiana Jones would win against Supergirl? She can shapeshift, and she has heat vision.”
“All I’m saying is, it’s really hard to see a whip coming.” Lucas is stretching the limits of his seatbelt in his earnestness to get his girlfriend on his side.
It doesn’t work- Max rolls her eyes and taps at your shoulder. “Help me out here. His logic is totally shit, right?”
Making a turn onto the main road, you nod your assent without looking back. “I think you should listen to your very smart girlfriend, Lucas.”
Max makes a triumphant “hah”, and Dustin adds fuel to the argument’s fire when he drags in some other comic book character that you’ve never heard of. 
You hazard a glance in your rear-view mirror at Max, who’s too busy dishing out an enthusiastic rebuttal to notice. Her auburn braids swing with the movement of the car, and you wonder if they were done by her mother before work or if Max had to rely on her own hair expertise again. 
You’ve got a real soft spot for Max, always have. While you both have plenty of cause to bond over shitty home lives, it’s also Max’s brash and defiant attitude that drew you to her. She’s got the bravery you can only hope for, something that you are sure to tell her frequently, even though the compliment is hard for her to take.
You score a parking spot that’s right in front of the arcade, calling after the kids already scrambling out of your car that you want to leave at noon, sharp. They all give some form of distracted acknowledgement before disappearing into the building, so you figure the earliest you'll be getting out of here is noon-thirty. 
Not like you have much to do today, anyways, besides bother Steve and Robin at work- since the arcade is conveniently located right next to Family Video, it’s a perfect excuse to wait out the kids’ spring break activities in the company of your nearest and dearest.
You’re cutting a swift track up the sidewalk when you nearly collide with Eddie Munson, for the second time in less than 24 hours.
“Hey!” He beams at you, a wide, easy thing that fits on his face so well, like it was made to be there, boyish dimples digging in. “Long time no see.”
“Yeah,” you agree, trying to smile back but probably landing somewhere in the grimace region as memories of last night float to the forefront of your mind. Small talk. You can do it. Say something. “Um. Were you getting a movie?”
“Nah.” Eddie shakes his head, hooks a thumb at the Family Video doors behind himself. “Keith’s one of my regulars. That guy might actually smoke more weed than me.”
You hum mildly to show you’re still paying attention but really you’re looking at Eddie’s hair, dark curls that shift with each of his movements. His hair isn’t black, like you’ve been led to believe this whole time- with the morning light shining through, highlighting the halo frizz around the edges, it’s actually a deep, chocolatey brown.
Similar to his eyes. Which are trained on you. Because you haven’t talked in a weird amount of time and are now just openly ogling his hair. 
Before you can open your mouth to apologize Eddie asks, “You wanna smoke?”
You nod, perhaps a tad too enthusiastically, and then stretch on your tiptoes to peer around Eddie’s frame at the Family Video sign. “Yeah, but we gotta be fast unless you want the Wonder Twins joining us.”
His grin slips into a smirk, and he winks before taking your hand in his. “A quickie, then.”
That fluttering thing in your ribs is back. The metal of Eddie’s rings are cool against your palm as he leads you around the side of the building, dropping your hand once you both are leaned up against the red brick.
Trying not to outright stare again, you watch from the fringes of your vision as Eddie lights up and breathes a cloud of smoke into the air. His nails are painted black- they weren’t last night. An image of him- hunched over a kitchen table, tongue sticking out of those pillowy lips in concentration, a nail polish brush held in his long fingers- flits across your mind.
Eddie holds the cigarette out, filter-side towards you, and you shake your head lightly. “No thanks. I don’t actually smoke, I just wanted to talk to you.”
Eddie glows. Before he gets the wrong idea you start explaining, arms crossing tight over your chest in unconscious defense- “I wanted to talk about last night. And say I’m sorry. I’m not usually so…”
“Badass? Charming? Hot?” Eddie fills in when you trail off, taking in another deep drag of smoke. 
Christ. You feel heat rushing from head to toe as you ward off his flattery, nails nipping into your upper arms. “I was gonna say… talkative? I guess? I’m normally not one to pick fights, but Lenny was being a dick and I don’t like the way he treats the kids, or you, for that matter, and I was drunk and mouthy but that’s not an excuse to drag you into it and I’m sorry-”
“Hey, hey.” Eddie’s tone is soothing, low, cutting smoothly into your feverish confession. He reaches out and strokes the back of his knuckle across your hand, tiny half-moons from your nails leaving their impression as you soften your grasp on yourself.
He doesn’t seem to mind that you can’t look anywhere but at your sneakers planted in the gravel as he says, “You have nothing to apologize for, sweetheart. I’m a big boy, I can handle myself when it comes to dickwads like Lenny Baker. And I would say that rescuing fair maidens is part of my job description, but…”
Eddie stubs the half-smoked cigarette out against the brick, flicks it to the ground, and waits until you look up at him again before saying “You don’t seem like you’re in need of any saving.”
That flutter, again, as you hold his eye contact for as long as you can stand it. 
The corner of his mouth quirks up. “There she is.”
Mortified, you resist the urge to scream into your hands as you push off from the brick, instead squeezing them into fists at your sides. “Oh-kay. Well. I better head inside or Robin will send out the search party for me.”
Eddie lets you walk past him, but just before you turn the corner he says, “I’m across from the Mayfields in Forest Hills if you ever want some company. Or some good weed.”
Footfalls from his thick-heeled boots recede into the distance, and you take a minute to calm your breathing before pushing your way through the doors of Family Video.
Steve’s stocking a shelf of New Releases at the front of the store, vest-clad torso faced away as the bell above the door signals your entrance. On autopilot he monologues, “Welcome to Family Video, let us know how we can be of service.”
“Aw, I miss the days when you were forced to say Ahoy, mateys!” You tease, Steve turning to give you an irritated frown as you prop your hip against the register counter.
Robin clacks away on the computer, hitting the Enter key a little harder than necessary as she says, “You’re about one mall fire and a bajillion NDA’s too late to ever hear that shit again.”
Keith must be lurking around in the back office, ‘cuz the three of you only refer to last year’s cataclysmic series of events as a “mall fire” when you’re talking in code. 
Or if you’re trying to be funny. But based on the dark circles under Robin’s eyes and the harried way Steve’s shoving a hand through his hair as he drifts towards the counter, you surmise that the three of you are very much on the same page this morning with regards to humor and hijinks.
“I didn’t know it was possible to be this hungover,” Robin groans, sinking her hand into a torn-open Skittles bag and popping a handful into her mouth. “Sugar is supposed to help, right?”
You snort, fiddling with a stack of paper brochures as Steve leans against the counter. 
“Had any more run-ins with the town riffraff?” He asks, feigning casual, honey-colored eyes roaming around the shop.
“I’m visiting you, aren’t I?” You shoot back, unreasonably defensive. 
“Another point for the pretty lady, and Harrington strikes a zero,” Robin totals in her best sports broadcasting voice. “What the hell are you talking about, Steve?”
“Drinky McGee over here was spilling her guts last night to none other than Edward Munson,” Steve replies, looking satisfied when Robin’s eyes bug dramatically.
“Eddie?” Robin hops off the stool, sliding her hands from the other side of the counter to stop your own from ripping the brochures to shreds. “And what, pray tell, were you spilling about with Eddie Muson?”
“Nothing.” You pull your hands from Robin’s, rolling your eyes as if the stakes are low, when in fact the stakes are as tall as the Empire State Building. You can practically hear the wind whistling from this height. “I wasn’t… we barely talked. He was backing me up when some jock started messing with me. That’s all.”
Robin whirls on Steve with animosity- “You left her alone long enough for some meathead to get involved? Jesus, Steve, the hell is wrong with you?”
“Like you shacking up with Vickie after two Tears for Fears tracks is any more responsible!” Steve snaps.
Having spent enough time with both your friends to know their propensity towards petty arguments, you slap a hand against the counter to derail. “Hey! Both of you knock it off. It’s fine, I’m fine, we survived yet another night out on the town unscathed. Let’s just… drop it.”
Steve looks properly chastised, but Robin gets a glint in her eye that confirms she’s not thrown off the scent so easily. 
“You know what they call him, right?” she asks you, lowering her raspy voice even further.
“Eddie The Freak Munson,” Steve supplies, but shrinks noticeably when Robin gives him a withering look. “...not that, then?”
“Of course you, Steve The Hair Harrington, would only know him by that name.” Robin shakes her head, disapproving, before turning back to you with a wicked grin. “Word on the street holds Eddie The Munch Munson in very high regard.”
Steve scoffs at this, but you blink, uncomprehending.  “Munch, like… he eats a lot of food?”
You feel very suddenly and violently ganged up on when Steve and Robin give you mirrored quizzical looks.
“No, babe,” Robin says, slowly. “Munch as in he eats pussy.”
“Jesus christ.” Heat courses through you as you scan the empty store, even as Steve chuckles and says, “You really are a prude.”
A skittle sails airborne into the side of his temple and he flinches, Robin coming to your aid. “That’s no way to talk to a lady, Steven.”
“I’m so not a prude.” You’re quick to jump to your own defense. “I just… didn’t know what that meant.”
You’d had a boyfriend for 6 months your sophomore year of high school, Ben- nice enough guy, but you’d mostly dated as an excuse to get all your firsts out of the way. Some laid-back hookups have occurred since then- it’s not like you’ve been chaste all these years, for fuck’s sake.
But you certainly wouldn’t give any of those boys a prize-winning nickname for their ability to eat you out. 
“It’s all baseless gossip, right?” Steve grabs a nearby wheeled cart and pushes it to the New Releases, resuming his shelf stocking. “I mean, what the hell else are small-townies good for other than trading lies like baseball cards.”
“I dunno,” Robin says, thoughtfully, sucking at her front teeth. “If the token lesbian is hearing about it, then he’s gotta be some sort of sex god.”
Steve’s making a snarky comeback, but you can’t hear him over the whistling in your ears.
You stare blankly out at the parking lot, one hand absently crunching at a brochure, trying really hard to think of anything but those plush lips and all the places you want them. 
____
Ever since the events of last year ripped a hole in your found family’s world, you make it a weekly habit to visit Max.
You’re always armed with some excuse- made too much pasta, please take it off my hands and put this tupperware in your fridge; I was on my way to the thrift store and thought I’d stop by, wanna come with and help me pick out some new jeans?- so that it’s harder for Max to deny your company. Slowly, over the last handful of months, by way of secondhand book offerings and slices of leftover pizza, Max has let her guard down enough to let you in. 
Even on days like today, when her demeanor suggests active disdain (calling you “mom” with a caustic bite when you ask after her last meal, rolling her eyes when she finds you doing the leftover sink dishes), you don’t take it personal. Her coldness towards little acts of kindness is due to the shitty way other people have failed her. And plus, you’ve put in enough effort to be able to see the warm side of Max Mayfield.
Like now, for instance- she’s giving you a bone-crushing hug on your way out, freshly-braided hair pressed tight to your sternum as you hug her back and sway in the doorway. The hug is quick and fierce, over in seconds as she slips back into practiced indifference
“Stay out of trouble this week and I’ll buy you a pony,” you joke as she pulls away, and the smile that she cracks makes it all worth it. 
“Make it a racehorse and you’ve got yourself a deal,” she says, giving you a small wave before closing her front door.
You walk down the dirt path to your parked car, keys in hand. Tonight’s schedule is that of a responsible, sensible young adult- the classified ads on your desk at home need trawling through, and a laundry pile the size of Hoosier Hill waits expectantly on your floor.
But there’s this crawling under your skin, a feeling that tends to flare up every so often, a craving for some sort of release gnawing at the edges. Usually the cure is sad music and masturbation, or some of Steve’s parents’ wine and a cheesy romcom. 
Or weed. That tends to work, too.
You’re shoving your keys into the pocket of your denim jacket and walking across the way to Eddie’s trailer before you lose your nerve, scuffing your sneakers against his porch while you knock.
He looks surprised to see you, dark brows raised, leaning into the palm he’s got on the doorframe- “Oh shit. Hi.”
“Hi,” you reply, tracking one foot up the back of your calf, feeling timid under his gaze. “Do you… can I buy some weed?”
When he nods, you duck under his arm and drop to one knee on the carpeted floor to untie your laces.
“Shit, sweetheart, don’t go to all that trouble.” He lets the door close, enveloping you both in the moody lighting of his trailer. There’s a radio playing the local rock station dimly from one of the bedrooms, and as you toe off your shoes you notice a gleaming black guitar leaned upright against the couch.
“Do you play?” You drift over on sock feet to gently brush across the strings, a faint and discordant noise rising and fading underneath your fingertips.
“Yeah.” Eddie’s voice comes from just over your shoulder as he watches your gentle fingers on his prized possession. “I’m in a band, actually. You should come see us play sometime.”
“That’s cool,” you say earnestly. “I remember when you got in trouble for that talent show performance- your band was totally swindled out of first place, if you ask me.”
When he doesn’t respond right away, you hazard a look at him over your shoulder and find him staring at you again, something you’re still not used to, giggling out a little “What?” as his eyes stay on your face.
“You’re pretty, that’s all.” The Dio logo on the front of his tee ripples when he shrugs a shoulder. As if he knew it would embarrass you, he leaves no room for your disagreement, turning away into the kitchen, stretching tall for the metal lunchbox on the top of his fridge.
His shirt lifts with the stretch, a flash of stomach lined with a trail of dark hair that makes you swallow back the gathering saliva in your mouth. 
“So, weed,” he’s saying as he pops the lid on the box, shaking out a small bag of fuzzy-looking green clumps. “I can set you up with a couple of days’ worth, if you want.”
“That sounds good,” you reply, mustering courage to drift to Eddie’s side, pretending to assess the baggie he’s holding, committing to memory the way his long fingers deftly pluck apart bud from stem. “That way I can come back and buy more.”
His fingers pause, halfway to the metal grinder nestled in the lunchbox as he says, “You know, you don’t need to use weed as an excuse to come see me. I think we’ve already established I like lookin’ at ya, so you’d be doing me a favor if you came by more. Just to hang out.”
This offer sits between you as he grinds the weed down, then tips a stripe of it neatly across some rolling paper. His dexterous fingers pinch and tuck until a joint takes shape, a small strip of the paper poking out.
He holds it to your lips, brown eyes shimmering with warmth as he waits. 
A Stevie Nicks song starts up on the radio, muffled by the trailer walls but crooning through all the same. This close to Eddie for the first time, you can smell him- balmy and spicy, like bergamot and Irish Spring. 
You lean into the joint, licking across the paper in one unbroken motion. Your tongue catches on Eddie’s thumb when you pull away, and there’s a salt-warm taste that settles in your mouth.
“Good girl,” he says, in that low-toned voice, and you have to fight to keep your thighs from pressing together in your jeans.
“Wanna smoke here?” Eddie smooths the spit-damp end of the joint down, giving the end a twist. “Good way to test out the merchandise. First one’s free.”
You shake your head as he extends the joint- “I’m definitely paying you, Eddie. And no, I can’t smoke here.” With you being the unspoken addition to that sentence. 
“Aw, shucks, sweetheart,” he drawls, devilish grin creeping back in, “You don’t trust me?”
“It’s not you I don’t trust,” you admit, before you can stop yourself.
His brows shoot up again, then waggle, obscenely. “Afraid I’m gonna be too tempting to resist once you’re in the clutches of the Green Dragon?”
Something like that, you think, wryly, but that fluttering is back and you really want to shut it up, so against your sensible, better judgment, you take the joint from Eddie’s hand.
“Got a light?”
You haven’t smoked in over a month, and with your tolerance so low two hits is all it takes to get you sprawled out on the living room floor, arms akimbo like you’re making a carpet snow angel.
Eddie’s a bit more restless in his high, plucking melodious and listless tunes from the couch with his guitar, one foot propped on the coffee table near your head.
Feeling loose-limbed and confident, you stare unabashed up at Eddie. He’d put his hair into a low bun, earlier, and there are a few dark tendrils swinging free around his neck with the rocking movements of his body to the music. 
He hits a snag, string buzzing out a dissonant noise. “Can’t focus with you lookin’ at me.”
“Sorry,” you murmur, except you’re not at all. “Now you know how I feel all the time.”
He sticks his tongue out at you, your girlish tittering in answer; you pat the carpet beside your hip. “Come lay with me.”
His body responds easily to your request; Eddie props the guitar back up against the couch and stretches out next to you with a sigh, a wave of that smokey sweet smell coming with him.
Under your weed-filtered view, the popcorn ceiling above you is moving, whorling and undulating in the muted light. You’re feeling gutsy and sure of yourself as you ask aloud, “Do you really think I’m pretty?”
Your head turns so you can meet Eddie’s eyes, which are dancing across your face- cheek to lips to nose back up to eyes- and he doesn’t make a joke, this time, his words coming with weighty seriousness.
“Yeah, I do. I think you’re beautiful. Always have.”
“Always?” Your echo is a soft and seeking thing.
“Yeah, always,” he confirms, simply, as if it’s a fact of life. “Woulda made a move sooner, but you always seemed so…”
“Unapproachable? Aloof? Bitchy?” You fill the gap in his speech with adjectives that have been used to characterize you in the past- usually by boys in the heat of an argument over inconsequential things that have been lost to time, only the labels sticking around. 
Eddie gives you a reproachful look. “No. I was gonna say, you seemed like you were always in your own world.”
This throws you for a loop. Neck on a swivel, you look back up at the ceiling as Eddie continues.
“I wanted to get to know you more, but I’ll be the first to admit I was intimidated by you. I mean, you’re way out of my league-” Eddie ignores the sardonic snort you give to this- “-and I just assumed asking you out would've ended with an epic crash and burn.”
The ceiling stops swaying, and you swivel back to hold Eddie’s eyes again, the weed making honesty easy. “I always kinda thought you were beautiful, too.”
Awash with the bravery that only comes from being in an altered state, you keep the momentum that’s aided by Eddie’s soft smile and push up on your elbows. 
“I know what they call you.”
Eddie blinks up at you, then slowly, slowly, pushes himself up onto his elbows too. “Yeah?”
It’s a taunt, a dare, an I bet you won’t.
Shows how much he knows. When you’re drunk or stoned, he’d be hard pressed to find a bet you can’t win.
You say it, unwavering. “Eddie The Munch Munson.”
His lips fall open, leaning in towards you as if drawn by a magnet, and you think he’s gonna kiss you until he falls back against the carpet, scrubbing his hands down his face. “Shit. Fuck. We can’t do this.”
“Why not?” You’re a little taken aback, ‘cuz while it’s not an outright rejection, Eddie’s upping the drama, hands pressed into the sockets of his eyes, groaning as he tips into your side.
With his forehead pressed into the curve of your shoulder, he says softly, “I think we’re both a little too stoned to be thinking clearly. And I really, really want you to think clearly when it comes to this.”
“Comes to what?” You’re egging him on now, trailing your fingers up his bicep, coy and angelic. 
He rolls away from you, making a pained noise with his face smushed into the carpet before pushing himself off the ground. “You know what, princess. New topic, for the love of god. You hungry?”
You are, actually, and when he extends his hand to help you up, you take it.
Eddie whips up a box of mac and cheese while you sit on a counter nearby, conversation engaging and fluid as he cooks.
Between interjections of ‘scuse me, angel, gotta get into this cabinet and can you take over stirring for a sec? you answer all his questions. You tell him your favorite bands, the states you’d visited on a road trip when you were six, even giving him the whole “my mom’s a nice enough person but we don’t get along” spiel that you don’t usually get to until a third date.
If that’s even what this is. He’s scooping steaming noodles into two bowls, passing you one, leaning up against the counter closest to the one you’re sat on. Your knee rubs against his ribcage as you eat.
In between chews, he lets you ask about himself- his favorite bands, the states he’s never been but wants to travel to someday, the highlights of his golden years with his mom that he misses every day.
There’s a quiet lull, after your bowls are scraped clean and set aside. He helps you off the counter and tells you to pick out a movie; you load The Black Cauldron into the VCR and settle into the couch cushion.
Eddie puts an arm around you, lets you play with his hands for the bulk of the film, running your nails methodically across his palms. 
By the last act of the movie, you can feel your high beginning to fade, taking your courage with it; when the credits roll, you’re ready to call it quits and sleep off the hangover in your own bed.
“You sure you’re okay to drive?” Eddie asks, following after you as you tug your sneakers back on in the hall.
“Yeah, Eddie, I’ll be good. Thanks for the weed,” you say, pulling your jacket tight around your frame. “And for the- for everything.”
The smile appears again; the one that cuts deep dimples into his cheeks as he watches you step onto his porch.
When he says your name, you turn, keys in hand- “Yeah?”
Leaning into the doorframe like he had earlier, he cants his head, streetlight a warm glow across his cheeks. “You wanna know where I got my nickname, you come back in a few days. Sleep on it tonight.” And then he closes the door.
___
So, technically, he told you to come back in a few days, and showing up less than 24 hours later has to hint at being some sort of desperate. 
Which, fuck it, you kinda are, at this point. Frankly it’s a miracle you’ve lasted this long what with the whole being plagued with visions of Eddie Munson’s hands and lips and hair and that stupid fucking nickname every waking and dreaming hour you’ve spent apart. 
While you can appreciate the honorable nature of Eddie asking you to make a clear-headed decision, you’re wishing for a hundred things to take the edge off as you change out of the PJ’s you’ve been moping in all day.
Black tights stretch over your calves as you think of the whiskey you mom keeps hidden in the downstairs cabinet; denim miniskirt smoothed over your hips as you long for a deep hit of weed; hands shakily plucking your black tanktop into place as the urge to be anything but sober gets swallowed down. 
You make the ten minute drive to Forest Hills in silence (relative to the weird engine noises your hunk of metal car decides to make), wracking your brain for silver-tongued excuses but instead drawing blank after blank.
By the time you’re rolling to a stop in front of Eddie’s trailer, you still have no idea what you’re gonna say to him- only that something needs to be said. Max is at the Sinclair’s for the night, one less person to worry about witnessing you slamming your car door shut and walking right up to Eddie on his front steps.
He’s wearing a pair of overalls, grease-stained, shirtless underneath- the tail end of a larger ink piece peeking out against his ribs. There’s a lone bike tire on the ground, held steady by the spokes his boot rests on as he wrenches the middle hub, biceps rippling and flexing with each movement. 
Certainly a sight that would have stopped you in your tracks, on any other day. But you’re determined to have it out with the returning wingbeat behind your navel, planting your Converse in the gravel just before the first step that Eddie’s sat on.
He doesn’t seem surprised to see you this time, instead giving you a lazy smile on a half-tilt, wiping the tire oil from his hands onto the front of his overalls.
“What brings a fair maiden such as yourself to this ugly neck of the woods?” Eddie leans the tire up against the steps and rises to greet you.
You’re gonna lose what little nerve you have left if he touches you so you act quick, speaking as you cross your arms- “I need to tell you a few things.”
That stops him up short, just a few feet away as he inclines his head, hair loose around his bare shoulders. “I’m nothin’ but ears.”
A wet, rattling breath catches in your chest. You give a cursory scan around to confirm that the rest of the trailer park citizens are indoors, soft lights from rows of windows luminous against the darkening twilight sky.
“I have a… a thing,” you start, unsure of where to begin, really wishing you’d come up with a polished script on the ride over instead of being forced to flounder through for the right dialogue. “It started last year. With the mall fire?” 
When Eddie nods his understanding, you continue, in short starts and bursts, like you’re fighting with the words before they come out.
“Something… happened. To Robin, and Steve, and to- to me. It was really bad, for awhile, and then it got better, but I’m still…” your hands squeeze tight into the flesh of your upper arms, nails stinging. “I’m fucked up from it. And the only way I can talk about it is if I’m fucked up, too. S’why I can only hold a conversation when I’m drunk or flirt while I’m high, like there’s this bad thing inside of me that I can’t look at when I’m sober-”
There’s a frantic edge that’s slipped in to your voice and Eddie steps towards you, as if to soothe, but you’re not ready to give in yet so you take a step back, choking out the last few words- “I just- I wish I could tell you everything, but I can’t, not yet, and I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”
From somewhere in the forest behind, a bright chorus of crickets swells as you fix your focus on the ground, as Eddie’s boots crunch forward on the gravel, toe-to-toe with your sneakers.
He moves carefully, as if worried that you’ll spook- lightly brushing his fingers across yours, drawing your awareness to the fact that your nails are dangerously close to drawing blood, a sigh as you release.
“Thank you for telling me.” Unlike your own voice, his is low and sure as his thumbs brush against the red half-moons in your arms. “You’re really brave, you know that?”
He doesn’t leave room for you to dispute this, instead tracing the underside of your jaw with his knuckle, forcing you to hold his gaze, those deep brown eyes soft with empathy as he says, “I don’t have any expectations of you, ‘kay? I’ll be all ears when you need me to be, but you don’t have to spill all your secrets every time you come around. You wanna just watch shitty cartoons and keep my couch warm, that’s fine by me. Nothin’ else needs to happen.”
And it’s his acknowledgement of your admission, his softhearted way of letting you know that nothing needs to happen, that makes you brave.
Brave enough to tilt your chin into the lift of his finger as you say, “I didn’t just come here to apologize.”
You watch his Adam’s apple bob against the taut vein in his neck as he swallows, hard. 
“Yeah?”
When you nod, Eddie blows out a breath and turns on his heel, motioning you to follow him up the stairs. 
Your eagerness is obvious as you scramble up the steps after him, heart starting to thrum in tandem with the flutters as he shuts his front door behind the both of you.
“Take your shoes off,” is all he says, in a low, strained voice, before turning into the kitchen.
Obedient, you drop to one knee and jerk apart your sneaker laces with trembling hands. 
Now on nyloned feet, you step onto the linoleum tile of Eddie’s kitchen. He’s faced away from you at the sink, taut lines of his shoulders rising and falling as he washes his hands.
“You’re sober?” He asks, still at the sink, drying his hands on a patterned teatowel. 
When you realize he can’t see your nod, you speak- “Yes. Yeah. As a judge.”
A soft exhale through his nose, amused, as he finally turns to face you. Eddie’s eyes do that hypnotizing dance- skipping from your chin to your eyes to your lips back up again- and you let him, feeling exposed to the point of nakedness with the intensity of his focus.
“I want to hear you say it.”
The sentence winds through the air, joins the wings in your stomach, sits low in your belly as you shift your weight from side to side, a gentle rock to ease your flayed-alive nerves. 
You say it. “I want your mouth.”
Eddie takes a step closer, nearly toe-to-toe with you again. Over the familiar layer of bergamot and fresh hand soap he smells like the outdoors, and faintly of mechanic oil, hearty and wild.
“Where?” It’s a single word, but with so much weight- suggestive, a taunt, an offer.
You breathe him in, eyes fluttering closed, ‘cuz brave as you’ve been it’s still hard to say some things while looking at him. “Want your mouth… on me.”
He crowds into your space, one hand gliding smoothly to set against your waist, the other fitted against your neck, tapping a thumb to your lips.
You part them, passive and wanting, but he doesn’t press his finger to the pad of your tongue like you’d hoped. Instead, he lets his thumb stroke to the corner of your mouth to make room for his own. 
“Where?” he asks again, this time into your mouth. You can feel the tip of his nose graze yours, pinpricks of his hair tickling your cheeks. 
“Please,” is all you manage this time, awash with heat when you feel his smile form. 
“S’okay, sweetheart. I’ll work you up to it.” It’s a touch condescending, skirting that fine line between tease and mean, the same tone of voice that has your thighs pressing together.
And then, he gives you what you asked for. His plush lips- the ones that you’ve been fantasizing about for what feels like eons- are pressing against yours.
It’s a kiss that starts chaste, tender, but soon devolves into a heady, fevered thing when you push your tongue past the seam of his lips. He melts into you, using the hand he has on your face to keep you steady as he sucks your bottom lip into his mouth, grazing his teeth into the plush of it before going back to twining his tongue with yours. 
There’s an audible wet click as he pulls away, both of your chests heaving in the quiet that follows; Eddie rests his forehead against yours briefly to catch his breath, and then he’s tugging you down the hall and into his room.
It’s pleasantly messy and lived-in, posters and photographs taking up most of the walls, guitar cables snaking and criss-crossing atop his dresser. You take a seat on the bed, hands tightening into the flannel duvet while Eddie begins to undo the buttons of his overall straps.
Wholly fascinated, you watch as he pushes the thick material from his body and kicks it to the side, leaving him in just his guitar pick necklace and a simple pair of black boxers. Now on full display, you drink in the sight of the most skin you’ve ever seen of his- tattoos at his chest and arms dark against the rest of him, pale and gleaming softly in the yellow light of the bedside lamp. 
You’re trying to figure out if the larger piece on his ribs is a dragon or some other mythological creature when he moves in to sit next to you, his kisses erasing all thoughts.
Eddie’s making these throaty little noises as you kiss; his hands track lines from your hips to your sides to your shoulders, your chest unconsciously pressing into his touch. 
When his thumb catches on the outline of your beaded nipple through your shirt, he hisses lightly, drawing back to look at you again- “Is this okay?”
You nod, but he doesn’t seem satisfied with that, tsking as he swipes with his thumb again, watching closely as you react silently to the touch.
“Hard to tell when you’re enjoying yourself if you’re quiet as a churchmouse,” Eddie says, in a tone that’s reminiscent of training a pet. “You gonna let me hear you?”
Your teeth catch on your lower lip as he thumbs across your nipple again, shockwaves coursing into goosebumps as you choke out, “I’m not s-so good at that. Not without- fuck- weed..”
Eddie huffs a laugh, a little derisive but you figure he’s probably got the right, seeing as how you’re this worked up and he’s barely touched you.
“You’re plenty good at this sober, sweetheart. Want me to prove it?”
His hand falls from your breast, extricates one of yours from the covers, and slides it up the meat of his thigh- then to the front of his boxers.
The first noise you make for him is a small gasp, one that matches his own as you cup your palm over the thick jut of his hard cock.
“Told you,” he says, sounding strung-out, his hand still closed around your wrist, “You’re doin’ just fine at working me up.”
You wrap your fingers around the bulge as best you can with the fabric of his boxers separating skin from skin, gaining confidence to explore as his grip on your wrist loosens. The black ink at his ribs expands and shrinks with the bellows of his breath, jolting and stuttering with each stroke of your hand.
Just as he’s drawing in a breath to speak, tightening his hold around your wrist in warning, you still your movements. Delicately, slowly, you slide out of his grasp and take his wrist in your hand, placing his palm on your own thigh.
The whole “reciprocating pleasure with sound” is still a hard one to give in to; maybe you can compensate for your hesitancy by showing instead of telling. You guide his hand up, into your skirt, parting your thighs until his fingers find the wetness soaking through both your panties and tights. 
“Fucking… jesus.” Eddie moves with the fluid surety that you lack, middle finger running up the seam of your clothed pussy, your hips jerking reflexively when he catches against your clit. “This all for me, princess?”
In answer, you lean to bury your face into the crook of Eddie’s neck. He lets you, taking the opportunity to hook your leg over his thigh, spreading you out as much as your fitted denim skirt will allow.
You pant into the column of his throat as he strokes you through the light layers, the fabrics grinding friction into your clit caught under his fingertip. He rests his chin on the crown of your head, cooing praises that have your stomach muscles tensing.
“That’s it, good girl, such a good girl for me.”
Your clit is throbbing now as he rubs you in small, quick circles, and you’re so close to falling over the edge that you have to pull his hand away.
Eddie picks up on your unspoken plea; he tugs the skirt down your hips then tosses it blindly over his shoulder, reaching for the edge of your tights. He slips them down your thighs, your calves, peeling them off you with reverence. When all that’s left is your best pair of satin panties, he maneuvers you up against the headboard and stretches himself flat on his stomach, nose pressing into your core.
That heat has come back, flashing through you with a vengeance as Eddie mouths at your pussy through the satin, sloppily but with purpose enough to have your cunt clenching around nothing.
You stay up on your elbows, watching that mane of dark hair bracketed by your thighs, but when Eddie pulls your underwear down and off your ankle your weight falls back against the mattress.
The flat of his tongue licks a wide stripe from your weeping hole up to spread the wetness around your clit. When he sucks the bundle of nerves into his mouth, your head presses back into the covers, hands grappling above you for something to anchor your grasp.
When Eddie flicks the point of his tongue against that bright spot of nerves your hands find a pillow to grip, and when he moans into your pussy the vibrations have you instinctively pulling the pillow against your face, teeth biting into the fluff, masking the whine that would have been loud in the otherwise quiet room.
You think you might be able to get away with this setup (what with Eddie seemingly focused on making you explode into a million little pieces) but there’s a sharp smack before the outer skin of your thigh is burning, white-hot from the kiss of his rings.
Eddie’s mouth leaves you only for the time it takes for him to rip the pillow from your grasp and scold, “Uh uh, none of that, c’mon,” and then he’s back at your clit, suckling with renewed vengeance.
There are little stars bursting at the edges of your vision, your hands shooting down to grip at Eddie’s hair when he pistons the point of his tongue against you again. Your hips are subtly bucking into his mouth, shaking thighs involuntarily closing around his ears. Normally you’d be concerned about Eddie’s air intake but going off the moans he’s burying in your pussy, you’d hazard a guess that he’s really into it.
As if in confirmation, he pulls off your clit with a wet pop, laving his tongue up the junction where thigh meets pelvis, voice sounding wrecked- “Doin’ so good, sweetheart. Fuck, you got me so hard. Gonna blow a load in my boxers like a teenager, y’taste so good. Gonna let me hear you? Hm? Wanna hear you.”
You’re dizzy with want as you prop yourself on your elbows again, mouth falling open as Eddie sinks two of his fingers up to the ringed knuckle inside your velvet walls.
His other hand comes to rest on the soft curve of your stomach, pinning you in place, before he looks up at you, black pupils nearly eclipsing the chocolate brown. 
“What do you want?” he asks again, patiently, as if he doesn’t have two fingers nestled inside your cunt.
Your efforts to grind into him are stopped with his firm hold on your middle, and he tuts at you again- but instead of a reprimand, he seems to soften a bit.
“C’mon, angel,” Eddie says, with such tenderness that makes tears prick at the corner of your eyes. He presses his lips to the inside of your thigh before encouraging, “Lemme hear you say it, and I’ll make it so good for you. Promise.”
“Want you to make me come. Please.” Your voice is unsteady, but it’s audible enough.
Eddie rewards you by sinking his fingers further, to the hilt, heel of his palm catching against your clit. When you let out a warbling moan, he nods- “That’s it,”- before setting a steady rhythm for fucking his fingers up into you. 
“Fuck, Eddie- fu-uck…” you’re trying, really trying to stay in the moment and not get caught up in the noises you’re making- for him. 
When Eddie reattaches his mouth to your throbbing clit and angles his fingers to hit into that soft, spongy spot with each thrust, you feel waves of pleasure start to wash through you. There’s just time for a choked “Shit, Eddie, you’re gonna make me cum,” before you’re spasming around his fingers.
Somehow, you manage to stay on your elbows, bracing your body through the convulsive shocks, white-hot stars joining the wingbeat rhythm as Eddie takes you apart with his mouth and fingers.
He moans, long and low, fucking you through it and then some- your orgasm has been completely wrung out when you push at his forehead, whimpering at the overstimulation. 
“No, baby, one more, please. Gimme one more,” Eddie lifts his head to plead with you, sweaty bangs glued to his forehead- and then he’s back between your legs.
It’s this moment that makes you retrospective. Sex with boys, in the past, has always been a quick means to an end: a few minutes of foreplay, tamping down your own pleasure for the sake of blowing off some steam. 
But now, pleasure was being given to you in spades by Eddie Munson, and you wanted to give it back to him.
You come on his tongue and fingers, again, stomach tightening beneath his warm palm, and this time you really loose the sounds caught in your chest: a strangled mix of your bliss-soaked whines with his name, Eddie Eddie Eddie. 
You feel the bed frame jolt below you both as Eddie’s hips thrust into the mattress in a frenzied tempo.
“Fuck me.” He pulls away, finally, panting into the side of your knee. He rests his head against your leg, lips tinged pink and shining wet, gazing at you with lust-blown eyes. “You are so fucking hot. Holy shit.”
Bashful as your peak wears off, you pull him forward so you don’t have to look at him when you whisper, “Yeah?”
“Yeah, princess,” he says, slumping against your chest and into your arms. “That’s going straight to my long-term spank bank. Number one. For sure.”
You slap playfully at his shoulder, and he rises on his elbows to kiss you- once on the lips, twice on the cheek- warm palms on the outside of your shoulders. 
“Are you… d’you need any help?” you ask, reaching to tuck his hair behind his ears, feeling the crush of insecurity leech in. “I dunno if you even- I mean, did you…”
From all the physical activity, your breasts are half-spilled out of your bra, and Eddie bends to kiss at the tops of them, affectionately, shaking his head as he goes. “There is no world in which I would’ve lasted, just now. Very noble of you to assume, though.”
He grins at your giggle, then says- “I dunno about you, but I need some new underwear. Wanna borrow a pair of my boxers? Bet you’d look cute.”
________
Later, when you’re both cleaned up, dressed, and full from a pizza delivery, Eddie invites you outside for a smoke.
You sit with him on the porch couch, legs slung over his, a big flannel blanket shared over both your laps while he smokes with the hand that isn’t on your thigh. 
There’s a crunching of wheels on gravel, and Max Mayfield’s bike lamp cuts through the dark.
“Hey, Heavy Metal,” she calls out, undoing her bike helmet and leaning her bike into its kickstand. “Are you done fixing up Lucas’s tires or do I have to keep hauling my ass all the way across town to see him?”
“I’ll have it done tomorrow, Red,” Eddie calls back, giving her a salute.
Halfway to her door, she remarks, “You two are gross, by the way,” 
You cross your arms in the sweatshirt Eddie loaned you, slipping into irksome older sister mode easily. “So how’d it go with your boyfriend, tonight, Maxine?”
She flips you both off, but you catch the smile on her face before the front door bangs shut behind her.
Eddie chuckles, smoothing his palm up your thigh, then takes another drag. “You gotta come night smoke with me more often, angel. The streetlights suit you.”
“Gonna get me hooked on nicotine, too?” Your sock foot pokes him in the ribs and he tuts, snapping it up in his free hand and digging his thumb into the arch of your sole.
“Fuck no, your teeth are too pretty to ruin. Want you to come keep me company while I destroy my lungs.”
Another cloud of smoke lifts dreamily around Eddie’s face. His thumb is working wonders on the tense muscle of your foot as you tip your head to rest on the back of the couch. With the nearby streetlamp, his profile is cast in a warm glow; you do a dance of your own, eyes taking in the strong slope of his nose, tracking down to his lips, back up to the wild curls at his temple.
Eddie feels you staring, turns to fix you with a quit it look that you can’t help but laugh at- “What, so you’re the only one who’s allowed to stare?”
“That’s right,” he confirms, leaning forward to set his cig in an ashtray, bullying his way into your space, rings cold under your chin when he tilts your face towards his- “Gotta pay the piper for that obvious violation, sweetheart. Sorry. I don’t make the rules.”
This time, when the flutter within you kicks up, you have a place for it to go- melting softly into Eddie’s lips. 
___________________
I wrote the last third of this while blasted please don’t judge too harshly lmao
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shark-sslime · 6 months
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It's so sad that there are very few places anyone can go that provide that perfect secret little hideaway somewhere in th woods. Everything is someones property, public parks that are just grass, or housing developments now. I just want to be able to take a short walk from my house to some (not even that deep) woods and find a cool tree and make it my hang out spot and to walk along the naturally forming paths from other people and animals taking time to actually enjoy nature.
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💎 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗺! Hat of the Nimbus Mage
Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement by a druid, sorcerer, warlock, or wizard) ___ This twin-peaked wizard hat has thin, wispy clouds circling its mountainous spires. You can mentally command the clouds to look like different weather using an action. The hat has 6 charges and regains 1d6 + 1 expended charges daily at dawn. If you spend at least 1 hour in a naturally occurring fog bank, the hat regains all expended charges at the next dawn instead. 𝙎𝙥𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙨. While wearing the hat, you can expend 1 or more of its charges to cast the following spells from it, using the typical casting time for each spell when you do: “feather fall” (1 charge), “gaseous form” (3 charges), or “misty step” (2 charges; you appear as a swiftly traveling patch of fog). Alternatively, you can use an action to expend 1 or more charges from the hat to cast the “fog cloud” spell from it. For 1 charge, you cast the 1st-level version of the spell; you can increase the spell slot level by one for each additional charge you expend. 𝙉𝙚𝙪𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙯𝙚 𝙒𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧. While wearing the hat, you can use an action to expend 2 of its charges to return any naturally occurring inclement weather within a 1-mile radius, centered on you, to a neutral state. The neutral weather can be clear or with light clouds, cool or warm, and with either a calm or moderate wind. After 8 hours, the weather returns to its previous state, unless the GM rules otherwise. You must be outside to use this property of the hat. ___ ✨ Patrons get huge perks! Access this and hundreds of other item cards, art files, and compendium entries when you support The Griffon's Saddlebag on Patreon for less than $10 a month!
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calware · 8 months
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actually fascinated by the properties of the furthest ring. space and time don't behave normally, if you move through either one you don't move through it linearly. you can use it to travel to other universes because it's literally the space IN BETWEEN UNIVERSES. the nature of the furthest ring makes traveling through it with an intended destination virtually impossible because there's no way to predict where you'll end up unless you happen to have powers of prediction. or a really cool map. speaking of which, landmarks only appear where the fabric of reality within it has been damaged and destroyed. it contains a sun with the mass of two universes that simultaneously does and doesn't exist (because time does not behave linearly). it's populated by eldritch gods-turned-horrors that will drive you to insanity if you stay there too long but a sweet 13 year old girl chatted with them and convinced them to blow colorful bubbles into the void containing the memories of its inhabitants to make the space a little less frightening and little more familiar
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fatkish · 6 months
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Request for the Pro Heroes x child reader
Character(s): Hawks and/or Endeavor (yes I'm giving this man a chance to be a good person)
Prompt: Abandoned nonbinary reader with a Phoenix quirk (wings and fire) and everyone thinks they'll be a Villain because of how hot the reader's fire can burn. Phoenixes in Japan are seen as goddesses. (Reader was originally abandoned for coming out at nonbinary but the deal was sealed when the reader accidentally burned a house down)
-🦦
Thank you so much for your request. I’m so excited since this is my first official request. I already had an idea for a phoenix quirk so I hope you don’t mind that I used it here. I hope you enjoy this story and that it helps you.
Hawks and Endeavor x Phoenix Quirk Child Reader
Reader was 13 when they were found by Hawks and Endeavor
The reader’s mother had an endurance and adaptability quirk that allowed her to change her body to better fit her environment. For example: if the reader’s mother was stuck in the desert, her body would change to allow her to store excess water similar to how a camel does. Or if bullets were fired at her, she could thicken her skin and produce osteoderms (these are the small bone like plates that cover the crocodilian species’s backs)
The reader’s father had a weak heat quirk and could grow sharp feathers from his arms and shoulders.
Their parents were very traditional and strict. Having been a late bloomer was already causing strain on their relationship with their parents.
The reader developed their quirk late at the age of 10. The reader has retractable wings that are covered in specialized feathers. The Primary and Secondary feathers are sharp and resemble blades, these feathers harden after they fully develop. The Primary and Secondary Coverts are hard and sharp at the tips. When the tips of the Coverts rub or strike each other it creates a spark.
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Each feather has microscopic holes along the Calamus and a gland beneath the follicle that secretes an Ethanol based, oil-like substance that covers their skin protecting it from the flames but also acting as a fuel. This oil is similar to Bakugou’s nitroglycerin sweat as they both produce more, the hotter they get. (Ethanol burns at an extremely high temperature but is invisible to the naked eye, you won’t know its there until you’re right next to it) The holes allow for the oil to cover the feathers.
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Due to their Mother’s endurance quirk, the reader’s body is unaffected by the flames they produce. The reader’s body sweat has a natural cooling effect as well as burn soothing and healing properties. This is how they are not burned by the flames. (The reader has to maintain a healthy hydration and drink lots of water because they are easily susceptible to dehydration)
Due to the reader’s quirk their body is naturally androgynous as they don’t have feminine curves or broad shoulders. The reader is short (5’2, sorry if you’re taller) and has a lighter than average body fat percentage to allow for easier flight. (Reader would most likely have a small penis like appendage to make urinating easier as well as a Cloaca. It’s also possible that reader could change their bodies physiology similar to how frogs can change their genders)
Due to the reader’s late development of a quirk as well as their androgynous appearance, they were seen as a freak and were bullied and shunned by their peers.
At age 12 the other kids around them began puberty and as their peers’s bodies began to change and developed they began to question themselves and eventually came to the conclusion that they were nonbinary.
One night their parents sat the reader down and began to discuss the reader’s appearance and how they needed to change in order to fit into society. Since the reader would have a harder time developing fat and couldn’t change the bone structure of their hips, their parents decided that the reader would be a male.
Their parents told them that they were to start working out and building up muscles to create a more masculine appearance. They began telling them about all the things they would have to change and even suggested drastic measures like surgery or hormone treatments to make them look more masculine.
The reader tried to explain to their parents how they felt and how they didn’t want to do all that stuff but they wouldn’t listen.
Eventually the stress became too much as the reader’s wings sprouted and their feathers naturally created a spark that ignited them. As the situation quickly became more complicated and stressful the reader accidentally bumped into a curtain, lighting it on fire, causing it to quickly grow and spread.
As their parents were shouting at them and their house went up in flames, they couldn’t deal with the stressful situation and flew off into the night sky, leaving their small town and flying far away to were they would discover in the morning to be Kyushu
After being ostracized and shunned for basically their entire life, the reader didn’t have much faith in society. Eventually they saw a news report about their hometown. Their parents claimed that their house was destroyed by a villain and blamed the reader for it, completely ignoring the fact of them being their child. The news showed a blurry picture of the reader that was taken by someone.
Due to the blurriness of the image as well as the reader having not really shown anyone their quirk, they weren’t easily identified. However, the news gave a short description of the reader and advised the public to keep an eye out for them and to alert the authorities should they spot the reader.
Realizing that they had no food, money, shelter or family and fearing being seen as a villain and being put in prison, should they ask for help, the reader decided that they had no other choice but to focus on survival.
2 months had gone by with the reader being homeless and barely scraping by. They had found an abandoned building in the less populated and more industrial area of the city and had created a small living space. They had gathered things that people had thrown away like tattered or stained clothes, old bedding, thrown out area rugs and other soft things that people had thrown away and wouldn’t realize were missing. They created a makeshift nest that made them feel safe
They had resorted to dumpster diving in order to find food and water and refused to pick pocket or steal purses. They didn’t want to do things that would make the accusations of them being a villain, true. This led to them being malnourished and having lost a lot of weight and having an emaciated and boney appearance
Hawks and Endeavor had been working together to capture a group of robbers who had been committing a string of robberies but kept getting away. Earlier in the day, the pair had apprehended and caught the group, but two of the seven had managed to escape and fled.
The robbers fled and hid in an abandoned building and planned to lay low and wait for the chance to escape the city, unaware of the red feather stuck and hidden in one of their hoods.
Hawks and Endeavor gathered the police and their sidekicks and had them surround the area near the building. The plan was to wait for the two villains to feel safe and let their guard down, then Hawks and Endeavor would storm the building, if they tried to flee, they would be caught by their sidekicks.
Using a few feathers to scope out the area and get an idea of the perpetrators positions, Hawks sent feathers into the building and relayed the information to Endeavor
Upon sensing a third body inside the building Hawks was going to tell Enji about it but felt someone grab his feather
Realizing that the element of surprise might no longer be on their side, Hawks alerted Endeavor. Inside the building, the robbers had finally noticed the reader and started to attack them when the reader summoned their wings and began to defend themselves
Since it was nighttime, the reader’s flames were emitting a blue glow similar to Dabi’s flames. Thinking that Dabi was in the building, Hawks and Endeavor rushed into the building only to quickly duck as one the robbers was sent flying over their heads from a strong wind
Using his feathers, Hawks was able to knock out the distracted robber and carry them both outside where the police quickly restrained and arrested them
Inside the building, Endeavor and Hawks had turned their attention to the reader. Upon realizing that the reader was just a kid, Hawks tried to tell them to stand down and stop their quirk. His feathers could sense the reader’s heartbeat, telling him that they were obviously scared.
When the reader tells them that they are unable to control the flames and that their wings secrete Ethanol to fuel them Endeavor is reminded of His first born son’s death
Having been living on the streets, the reader was unable to stay sufficiently hydrated and thus quickly ran out of protective sweat, causing the reader to begin being burnt
Hearing the kid’s screams of pain, Endeavor snapped out of his thoughts and quickly instructed Hawks to grab flame repressing foam from the the fire department and use his feathers to dump it on the reader
After following his instructions, the flames were quickly put out. Endeavor went over to the reader and carefully began to help them clean off the foam as he began to check the reader’s burns. Hawks took the moment to survey their surroundings and found the reader’s nest and realized that the reader was living here
Once the reader is calmed down and retracts their wings, Hawks asks about why the reader, a child, is living in an abandoned building
Fearing their situation but knowing that lying would only worsen their situation, the reader begins to explain their situation, telling the heroes what happened and why they are living here
As the police began to search the area and start to finish up their business there, Endeavor and Hawks both realize that the reader shouldn’t be returned to their parent’s custody but that placing them in the foster system would be bad due to their inability to control their relatively new quirk.
Due to developing their quirk later than others, the reader wasn’t given the same counseling and guidance that people normally get. Endeavor, having seen the reader’s potential as well as hoping to spare them the same fate that took his son, decided to become the reader’s legal guardian. Hawks, having plenty of experience with his wings and feeling a kinship with the reader, decides to become a mentor/older brother/fun uncle figure to the reader
Endeavor takes the reader to his home and has them get settled in.
Endeavor may seem grumpy and unapproachable but the reader quickly grows on him as Enji develops a soft spot for the reader.
Enji tries to teach the reader how to control their flames but is constantly reminded of how he trained his children and worries that the reader will hate him
Eventually Hawks is able to teach the reader to control their flames when he tries to have the reader cook chicken with them. Hawks originally intended it as a joke but Endeavor saw the accidental genius and decided that it was a good idea. Hawks just wanted some chicken
The reader has a tendency to build nests as a result of their father’s side of the family having mostly bird related quirks. One day Enji comes home from patrol to see the reader has built a giant nest in his living room. The reader is sitting in the nest in front of the TV. Hawks walks into the room with popcorn, snacks and drinks. After much convincing, Enji finally agrees to sit with them and watch a movie
Half way through the movie the reader falls asleep and snuggles up to Enji’s side. Wrapping an arm around them, Enji lets them sleep as he realizes how much he’s missed out on with his other kids. It’s at this moment that Enji promises himself and the reader that he’ll be better and that he’ll cherish these small moments
Hawks and Enji don’t care about the reader’s appearance, they understand that their quirk just makes their body different from others and they accept it.
Hawks will often visit the reader and they’ll preen each other’s wings. Hawks likes to make spa days out of this. He’ll take them to a bath house or bring bath salts to them. After relaxing in the bath he’ll either have a masseur give them both massages or they’ll massage each other. After that they’ll both take turns inspecting the other’s wings removing old or damaged feathers, combing the feathers, etc. after that Hawks will do face masks with the reader and basically anything that he can use as an excuse to relax
Overall, the reader is an irreplaceable part of Enji and Hawks’s lives now
I hope you enjoyed this.
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outermaybanks · 4 months
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i was thinking if mean!jj x kook!reader,
jj works for reader and she gets on his nerves but he kinda likes her and she teases him sometimes but little does he know she kinda likes him too
i LOVE mean JJ
a/n: soooo I loved this request so much that it kind of took on a mind of its own and became wayyyy too long, so this is part 1, part 2 coming soon after i proofread and edit. but also if this isn't quite what you were requesting PLS let me know I love this pairing and dynamic and would fully be willing to try again
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part two posted
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This summer was supposed to be your summer. Your dad had bought you your dream car, a whole new wardrobe, and your parent’s 15th anniversary fell in the middle of July, and this year you were promised the house to yourself for that week while your parents took a second honeymoon. 
But then, your dad hired none other than the infamous JJ Maybank to work for him this summer. 
Now, normally, you would have no problem with your dad hiring a Pogue to work around the house, both of JJ’s friends, Pope Heyward and John B Routledge had worked small jobs for him in the past, but JJ was practically your worst nightmare when it came to your plans. You had planned for this summer to be the best ever, to be the height of your social life, and now, the most big mouthed, impulsive, Kook-hating and downright rude Pogue to ever grace the OBX was working in your house five days a week.
So, you naturally came to one conclusion: You had to get JJ to quit before your parent’s trip in the middle of July.
June 10th
It started small, ignoring him when he was there, it was no secret that JJ hated Kooks, so you figured being as rude as he assumed you to be would be easiest. But honestly, it seemed like JJ liked that you ignored him, so you had to kick it up a bit. 
“Hey Pogue!” You called as you stepped out of your mansion, clad in only a bikini as you prepared to enjoy your pool. JJ released the gas on the lawn mower to make it stop as his jaw clenched and he put on his most tolerable face. “When you finish with the lawn, you need to change the oil in my car.”
“In case you didn’t get the memo, princess, I work for your dad, not you,” JJ called before reaching for the pull cord. You made your way down the steps and over to him just as he began tugging the cord, but you stood right in front of the mower, so JJ begrudgingly released the bar again.
“In case you didn’t get the memo, my daddy does anything I say. Daddy has fired workers for making my food wrong, so really, you work for me, princess. Got that?” You asked with a sickeningly sweet smile. JJ’s lower jaw stirred then clenched into a forced smile. “You got it, ma’am.” “That’s better, Maybank.”
You didn’t like being mean, and you didn’t like asserting power over others, that’s why you didn’t just follow through on your word and tell your dad to fire JJ. You knew he needed this job, and you didn’t want to close that window for him permanently, but this was a man who was known for getting into fights, especially with Kooks, a man who you already knew hated you, and now he was standing in the way of your summer plans. JJ being here meant half the Kooks you knew wouldn’t step foot on the property just to avoid drama, or avoid upsetting their boyfriends. You just needed your summer back. If you could just get JJ to quit for the summer, you’d have your daddy offer him more money to come back in the fall. Really, a win win for everybody.
You weren’t naive to the rumors around the island about JJ, and as you walked towards your lounge chair on the edge of the pool, you couldn’t help turn your head to catch a glimpse of JJ’s arms as he yanked the starter cord to resume mowing the back lawn. 
June 17th
A week had passed since that encounter, and JJ showed no signs of quitting. He was currently cleaning your pool as you were inside, in the cool AC, as your mom had the house chef make you lunch. The house chef liked to listen to noise while they worked, so from you sat at the island, sipping a pina colada, you heard the weatherman announce the heat wave that was currently plaguing the Outerbanks. Despite everything, you found yourself looking out the window to JJ, shirtless as he used the pool skimmer.
You groaned to yourself as you couldn’t bring yourself to cruelty. You went to the fridge and grabbed a cold water bottle before sliding the glass door open.
“Hey Maybank!” You called, making JJ look up. You held up the water bottle then gentle tossed it to him. JJ dropped the pool skimmer to catch it, and then inspected the water bottle before opening it. He gave it a test sniff, which make you giggle, before he took a sip.
“Thanks, Kook.” “Just y/n works, y’know. Unless you want to go back to calling me princess,” You joked, walking closer to him, your lips wrapping around the straw to sip your pina colada as JJ downed the water bottle. 
“Can I ask you something?” You asked suddenly, surprising yourself that you had actually spoken your thoughts aloud. “What?” JJ replied coldly, looking at you suspiciously. “Why did you start working for my dad? Everyone knows you hate Kooks, I figured that meant you’d want to stay as far away from them as possible.” “Well, firstly, don’t assume you know anything about me. Secondly- you’re right. I do hate Kooks. Your dad was offering more than anyone else, that’s all.” “Really? Extra money is all it takes to abandon your morals?” “See, that’s it right there. To you, it’s extra money. To me, it’s survival. All you damn Kooks wouldn’t know shit about struggling. But god forbid you don’t have a brand new dress to wear to your weekly Courtillion or some shit.”
“Cotillion,” You corrected. “Which is only for debuntants, which I am not.”
“What the fuck ever. The point is, you think you know real struggle, so when you see someone actually struggling, you don’t give a fuck, but the truth is you’ve never had a real problem. Rich people make up their own problems so they don’t get bored, and then act entitled to people who actually struggle, it’s fucking annoying,” JJ finished before picking the pool skimmer back up. His words felt like a slap in the face, but you took them to heart. That night, you went to your dad and told him he needed to pay JJ more. 
June 20th
“Chug, chug, chug!” The amalgamation of voices cheered on as Kelce and Topper shotgunned a beer. Since you couldn’t invite your friends to your house, you had gone over to your friend’s house for some fun, but then she got a text about a get together at the beach, so that’s where you found yourself. 
“Hey, y/n, what’s this I hear about JJ Maybank working for your dad or something?” A girl named Hannah asked. “Yeah, he started a few weeks before summer break,” You answered. “Ooooo,” The girl teased. “Has he been… putting the work in?” You rolled your eyes, a sick feeling forming in your stomach at her words. “That’s so- It’s not like that. I barely speak to him,” you answered, bringing your beer can to your lips, hoping that would end the conversation. “You’re better than me, girl. On the first day I would’ve jumped his bones.”
It disgusted you to hear Hannah reduce JJ down to his looks, to his sexual reputation. You couldn’t help but remember what JJ had said about all Kooks feeling entitled.  
“Actually, Hannah, he’s like, really cool, and smart, and… passionate about his hobbies. He’s not just a dick for you to jump on,” Honestly, you pulled all of that out of your ass, but you just couldn’t let her speak about JJ like he was a piece of meat.
Hannah laughed. “And you learned all of that by barely speaking to him? Yeah, sure, y/n, it’s okay, your secret is safe with me. I wouldn’t want everyone to know I was boning a Pogue either.” That was your limit. You quickly excused yourself, and when no one was looking, you left the beach.
Unfortunately, your friend had driven you, so you were stuck walking home. Whatever. You couldn’t stand to be there another moment.
JJ had been off that day as well, so he had spent the day with his friends, and they were currently on their way back to John B’s house. Just as JJ had put his blunt between his lips, about to spark it, his night was ruined.
“Hey, is that y/n y/l/n?” John B asked as he slowed down the Twinkie to get a better look.  “Yeah, yeah, it is,” Pope answered. “Stop the van.” “What? Why? She can walk just fine,” JJ argued. “It’s dark out and she’s walking alone,” John B answered. “So? She’ll be fine.”
“JJ.” John B scolded before pulling the van over beside you. You recognized John B’s van from when it was parked in your driveway when John B worked on your dad’s boat. “Hey, y/n, you alright?” John B asked after he rolled the window down. 
“I- Yeah, I just… my car ran out of… oil… so… walking.” Your lie pricked up JJ’s ears, as he had practically become your personal mechanic, he knew there was nothing wrong with your car because he had checked it before going home yesterday.
“Do you need a ride?” Pope asked from the passenger seat.
You couldn’t get JJ’s words out of your mind. Kooks create their own problems because they’re bored.
“No, no, really, I’m fine… Um, but my phone died, do you- um- Do you know how I would get home from here?” The beach you guys had gone to had been on the border of the Cut and Figure Eight, you had never ventured that far before. 
Of course she doesn’t even fucking know her way around, JJ thought. He argued with himself in his mind before leaning forward between John B and Pope. “Just get in, princess, we’ll get you home.”
It had shocked you to suddenly see JJ, although you suppose it shouldn’t have considering the three of them had been joined at the hip for as long as you’d known them. Before you could get  out a response, the van door slid open, and JJ was beckoning you inside. You stood there, frozen.
“y/n, c’mon, your dad would have my ass if he found out I left you out here alone, just get in.”
You slowly got inside the back of the van, JJ slammed the door shut as he leaned back on the bench. You noticed the unlit blunt between his fingers.
“Is that weed?” You asked. JJ sighed. “You caught me, princess, but I’m off the clock, I would never smoke while-” “Can I hit that?”
JJ was taken aback, and his first instinct was to get defensive, why the hell would he share his bud with a Kook? But he realized, if you took a hit, he’d have just as much dirt on you as you had on him, so he happily handed it over. You carefully put it between your lips then held your hand out for a lighter, but JJ would be damned if a Kook stole his favorite lighter, so he lit it for you. He was surprised by how naturally you inhaled the smoke, and how relaxed you looked as you exhaled. JJ then realized how little he actually knew about you, but then, he got angry with himself for thinking that.
“So what happened? Chad didn’t ask you to Cotillion?” JJ asked coldly, but you smiled to yourself because he said it right this time.  “I already told you I’m not a debutant, and who the fuck is Chad?” You couldn’t help but giggle as you took a second hit, then handed the blunt back to JJ.  “You know what I mean.” “Yeah, I do. That was your sneaky way of asking me what’s wrong,” you called him out.  “You wish,” JJ replied flatly before taking a hit. “Actually, since you asked, I didn’t like how a girl there was talking about you, so I left.” “I didn’t ask.” “Mmm kind of seems like you did.”
Pope chuckled from the front seat, taking your attention for a minute, and when you turned back to look at JJ, he seemed deep in thought.
“If I’m being honest, hearing her talk that way about you reminded me about what you said about Kooks the other day, and… I didn’t want to be around people who act like that.” “Huh. Didn’t think you Kooks listened to non-Kooks.” “Well, maybe you shouldn’t assume you know anything about me,” you threw his words back at him, making him raise an eyebrow at you.
After John B dropped you off, you charged your phone and had dozens of missed texts and calls from your friends, but you couldn’t care less. That night, all you could think about was JJ Maybank.
July 1st
After John B gave you a ride home, JJ ignored you even more. You had half a mind to throw away your plan, JJ’s words had haunted you and you didn’t want to be the type of person he described, but on the other hand, there was a part of you that had spent way too long trying to fit in, you couldn’t throw it away over one boy’s opinion, so you settled for a happy medium.
JJ’s bike was parked in the driveway, so you knew he was working today. You eventually spotted him in the back, working on your dad’s boat, so you mustered up your courage and boarded the boat, walking over to him with crossed arms. 
“Maybank,” You greeted. “Y/L/N,” JJ mimicked, keeping his eyes on the tools in his hand. “I’ve come to you with a deal.” “Oh yeah? And what would that deal be?” “You can’t be here at all for the week that my dad’s gone. I’ll tell him you came, you’ll still get paid, just don’t actually come.” “Am I supposed to believe that you’ll be doing all my work during that week?” “I- Fuck it, fine, yeah, I’ll do your job for the week.”
This took JJ by surprise. No Kook ever was willing to get their hands dirty.
“Why do you need me gone for that week?” “Because I’m throwing a party,” JJ was already laughing. “I’m serious, I’m throwing a party, and half my girlfriends can’t come because their boyfriends don’t want them around you.” “Smart guys,” JJ retorted, making you cringe. “Whatever. Do we have a deal?” “Like I’d want to be here anyway.”
You smiled, this was the best of both worlds, truly the best case scenario, and in your happiness you wrapped your arms around JJ’s shoulders, but he pulled away, tensed up, and then it hit you. You had grown comfortable with him, and that was your mistake. It didn’t matter that you gave him water, it didn’t matter that him and his friends had been your heroes, JJ Maybank hated Kooks. 
July 4th
“Sweetheart!” Your dad called from his office, you quickly made your way down the hall and leaned against the doorframe. You were already dressed for your family’s annual barbeque, which had become a big even on Figure Eight. 
“What’s up, dad?”  “Can you tell JJ he can go home early today after he cleans the pool?” You nodded and went downstairs to the backyard, once again finding JJ shirtless as he cleaned the pool.
“If you’re trying to get my mom to leave my dad for you, this whole thing won’t work, she prefers construction workers,” You said as you shut the door behind you, JJ looked up at you, but the only response was a confused face. “You know, the whole- hot shirtless pool cleaner has an affair with the lady of the house, that whole trope.”
A smile slowly crept on JJ’s lips, but then it turned into a smirk. “Did you just call me hot, y/n?” You quickly realized your mistake. “You know what I mean.” “Yeah, that was your sneaky way of flirting with me.”
Normally, you would’ve denied it, but this was the nicest JJ had ever been to you, which wasn’t saying much, but you liked it more than his constant ignoring you.
“So, my dad told me to come out here to tell you you can leave after you clean the pool,” you said. “Sounds good to me.”
That should’ve been your cue to go back inside, but instead you stood there, biting your lip as you internally argued with yourself.
“Do you have any plans for today?” JJ’s eyes came up to glance at you, almost suspiciously, “Uh, probably light a bunch of shit on fire.” “Well, my family has this like annual barbeque-” “Yeah, I know. Kie’s stuck going.” “Well… I just wanted to say if-if you wanted to stop by, a lot of my dad’s employees usually come.” “Thought you wanted to keep me far away from all your Kook friends, isn’t that our little deal?” JJ said, and in a panic you walked closer to him, trying to shush him so your dad didn’t hear. “That’s just for that party, and I wouldn’t even care about you being there if you didn’t start a fight with basically every Kook you meet.” “Who says I started it?”
That shocked you. Hearing your friend's stories, it had never occurred to you that they always omitted how the fight started, only how it had ended.
“Regardless, I just wanted to say if you wanted to stop by… it might be cool.” “Might be cool?” “God, do you always make it this hard for people to talk to you? Yes, JJ, it might be cool. It’s a barbeque, not a cult initiation.”  JJ chuckled. “Okay… Maybe I’ll come by. You might want to hide your mom though, I look good in a construction vest.” You smiled then bit down on your lip to hide it. “Okay. Maybe I’ll see you.”
©ᵒᵘᵗᵉʳᵐᵃʸᵇᵃⁿᵏˢ ²⁰²⁴
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mayullla · 8 months
Note
Yandere Tighnari 🌺🦋
Title: A Little Chocolate Test
Character(s): Tighnari (Genshin Impact) Warnings/tags: Yandere themes, Fem!reader, dubious consent, dubious/non con use of aphrodisiacs, yandere themes, yan Tighnari, 1k words
[ - A little present~! Event - Closed - ]
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You didn't remember clearly how you got here. There was a heat in your stomach as you looked lovingly at the man in front of you. You had always had a crush on this person for a long time. His cool hand gently held your face as you leaned towards him, in a daze. If he did not hold you in his arms, you feared you would have already slumped to the dirt floor, lacking energy to move, unable to make clear, solid thoughts.
"One more." Something touched your mouth. A familiar smell of chocolate, somewhat melted, left marks on the gloves of the man that you liked while also leaving some on your lips. "Come on, open up your mouth. You can do it."
It was difficult to do, yet you followed, weak to his words. Your face was already hot, not from the humidity, but because of the boiling that you felt within you, worsened under his stare as he looked down at you. His eyes looked at you like you were something to be studied, examining you made you feel like you were naked under him. You felt exposed, embarrassment seeping into your veins, wanting no more than to hide.
"Hmmm, so this is what happens when you eat those chocolates. I must say you are quite knowledgeable with your work. Where did you find out that this plant had aphrodisiac properties?" He asked you, mumbling half of the time. You groaned, head unable to concentrate on his words, yet your body was still so sensitive to his voice.
"Hmmm, I guess it would be hard to get an answer right now," Tighnari mumbled to himself, moving your hair away from your face. Both of you were on a fallen tree in the middle of the forest. In the middle of nowhere, you barely remembered that Tighnari had sent the other forest rangers away, but you could not remember the reason.
You didn't know when they would come back, as your attention was still on him. He was the one you had a crush on for the longest time. You were once both students in the same Darshan Amurta. You always had an interest in biology, unique plants, and fungus, and you wanted to learn and know more when you saw him.
For the longest time, it had always been an innocent crush. It was difficult to get closer to him when everyone always crowded around him, wanting to get his opinion on something or learn a little more. Even if you had a chance, your tongue was tied, and it was difficult to hold a conversation with him long enough for something to happen.
When he graduated, you could only watch from afar, smiling with a little sadness in your heart as he left. You thought that was the end, as you watched him leave from afar, thinking it was the last time you would ever have the chance to grow closer to him.
Your mind was too muddled to continue thinking, and you were too drugged to remember anything as he helped you push the next chocolate into your mouth, muttering to himself that he was curious about something. How did you end up in his arms? How did this happen?
"You know, I wasn't surprised when I smelled the chocolates on you when you arrived. I heard that you had been curious about the concept of chocolate being a natural aphrodisiac." You were having a difficult time breathing, feverish, yet just for a moment, you were lucid enough to realize that you were leaning on your crush's arms. When did he move you closer to him?
"Ah- No, no. Don't do that. You are too dazed right now; you will fall and hurt yourself." Tighnari huffed a sigh as he brought you closer to him while pushing another small bit of chocolate past your lips when you somehow finished the last one. You groaned again, moaning in suffering of this craving of lust. The light touches of Tighnari sent chills down your spine, yet at the same time, a torment for you who wanted more, yet as drool fell from your lips, unable to coherently make words except grunts, too dazed to form sentences.
"You have always been a romantic, even when we went to the academy. I sometimes caught you daydreaming and in a daze. It was quite cute, to be honest with you." None of his words were registering in your mind; you were too limp in his arms. "I was always curious as to what you were thinking; imagine my surprise when I heard you guys talking about me." He chuckled as if reminded by something, probably something that was supposed to be meant for only you and your friend. "It was disappointing to leave the academy, I must say, when I know that you were still there. But what to do, I was needed somewhere else... I guess you would not hear me now."
You moaned in complaint when he tried to move you again, unable to move as much as you tried to run away from his hands that you thought were trying to pull you away from him. His laughter as he told you that it was okay, his tail moving to curl around you. "Hmmm, you are quite cute like this too." His voice so close made you flustered, yet instead of recognizing your pain and lust, he laughed his hand stroking your back making it even more unbearable for you.
He was teasing you.
"I was curious as to how much you have done with your research on this chocolate. Seems like it is still a work in progress… but I actually quite prefer this outcome." You didn't realize your hand was held by him, fingers interlocked with each other, yours too weak to move anymore as he brought your hand near his lips. You didn't see the chocolate mark near his lips as he kissed the back of your hand. "Don't worry, I will take care of you."
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girlkisser13 · 3 days
Text
taste
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"well, i heard you're back together and if that's true" "you'll just have to taste me when he's kissin' you"
pairings: theodore nott x slytherin afab!reader
warnings/tags: cheating.
summary: it just supposed to be a situationship.
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the summer had been a whirlwind of emotions, sneaky rendezvous, and stolen kisses. it was a memory now, fading with the warmth of the sun as autumn crept in, the cool breeze blowing through the stone corridors of hogwarts. but as the leaves turned golden and red, and the castle filled once more with the chatter of students returning for the new school year, one thing remained vivid and sharp in your mind: theodore nott.
you had spent almost every day with him over the summer, your bodies tangled together in the sweltering heat, sharing secrets and laughter under the stars. he had been everything you never thought he could be— gentle, sweet, and completely yours. at least, that’s what it had felt like. the outside world didn’t matter when you were together. it was just the two of you, and nothing else seemed real.
but now that you were back at hogwarts, everything was different. the castle walls that had once seemed so familiar now felt confining, oppressive. it didn’t help that theo had slipped back into his old life as if the summer had never happened. as if you had never happened.
you watched from the shadows as he walked through the great hall, his arm draped casually over pansy parkinson’s shoulders. she was laughing at something he’d said, her dark eyes shining with adoration as she looked up at him. and theo… he looked every bit the part of the perfect boyfriend. he was smiling down at her, his fingers playing with a strand of her hair as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
you swallowed hard, turning away from the sight, your stomach twisting with something you refused to call jealousy. you had known this would happen. He had warned you. when school started again, he would go back to his life with pansy, his girlfriend, the girl everyone expected him to be with.
but knowing it and seeing it were two different things.
you tried to avoid him as much as possible, keeping to the back of the classrooms, sitting far from the slytherin table in the great hall. you even skipped out on the first few gatherings in the common room, not wanting to see him with her, not wanting to see the way he looked at her with those familiar eyes that had once only been on you.
but, of course, you couldn’t avoid him forever.
it was during potions that it happened. professor snape was droning on about the properties of some obscure ingredient when theo slipped into the seat beside you, his presence sending a jolt of electricity through your body. you kept your eyes on your cauldron, refusing to acknowledge him, but you could feel his gaze burning into the side of your face.
"are you just going to ignore me all year?" he asked, his voice low, barely a whisper.
you clenched your jaw, your hands trembling as you stirred the potion in front of you. "what do you want, theo?"
he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "i just wanted to talk. you’ve been avoiding me."
you finally turned to look at him, your eyes narrowing. "can you blame me? you’ve been glued to pansy’s side since we got back."
his eyes softened, and for a moment, he looked like the boy you’d spent the summer with, the one who had held you close and whispered sweet nothings in your ear. "you know why i have to."
you bit back the retort that sprang to your lips, knowing it would do no good. you did know why. you knew all the reasons he had to be with her, to keep up appearances, to play the part of the dutiful boyfriend. but it didn’t make it hurt any less.
"whatever, theo. it doesn’t matter." you turned back to your potion, ignoring the way your heart clenched in your chest.
he reached out, his hand brushing against yours, and you almost pulled away, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. "it does matter," he whispered, his voice strained. "you matter."
you squeezed your eyes shut, willing yourself not to cry. "if i mattered, you wouldn’t be with her."
there was silence, and then, "it’s not that simple."
you laughed bitterly, shaking your head. "it never is, is it?"
snape’s voice cut through the tension, snapping at someone across the room, and you took the opportunity to pull your hand away, focusing on the potion in front of you. you didn’t look at theo again for the rest of the class, and when the bell rang, you were the first to leave, not even waiting to clean up your station.
you needed space. space to breathe, to think, to forget the way his touch had sent shivers down your spine, the way his words had made your heart ache.
but space was hard to come by at hogwarts, and avoiding theo became even more difficult as the weeks went on. you’d catch glimpses of him in the corridors, his hand entwined with pansy’s, his lips pressing soft kisses to her temple. it was like a knife to the heart every time, but you kept your head down, kept to yourself, and tried to focus on anything other than the boy who had stolen your summer and then shattered it.
it wasn’t until a hogsmeade weekend that things came to a head.
you were browsing through the shelves of honeydukes, looking for something to satisfy your sweet tooth, when you saw them. theo and pansy were at the counter, pansy laughing as theo tried to haggle with the shopkeeper over the price of a box of chocolates. you rolled your eyes, turning away from the sight, but not before you saw him glance over at you, his eyes meeting yours for just a moment.
you could see the guilt there, the regret, and it made your blood boil. how dare he look at you like that, like he was sorry for something he had done to you, like he hadn’t been the one to walk away?
you grabbed a handful of sweets and marched up to the counter, slapping them down beside theo’s chocolates. pansy turned to look at you, her eyes narrowing as she recognized you.
"well, well, if it isn’t the little lost lamb," she sneered, her voice dripping with disdain. "what are you doing here, all alone?"
you forced a smile, ignoring the way theo tensed beside her. "just enjoying a bit of freedom, pansy. not everyone needs a boyfriend to hold their hand everywhere they go."
her eyes flashed, and you knew you had struck a nerve. she had always been possessive of theo, even before they had started dating. it was one of the things that had made sneaking around with him so dangerous— and so thrilling.
"maybe not, but at least i have one," she shot back, her lips curving into a smirk. she glanced at theo, her fingers curling around his arm. "right, darling?"
you had to hand it to her; she knew how to play the game. but so did you.
you leaned in closer, your eyes locked on hers as you dropped your voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "you might want to check your boyfriend’s lips before you kiss him next time, pansy. he seems to have a thing for my strawberry lip gloss."
her face went pale, her eyes widening as she turned to look at theo, who was staring at you with something like horror in his eyes. she blinked, confusion and anger warring on her face as she looked back at you.
"what the hell are you talking about?" she snapped, her voice wavering.
you shrugged, stepping back and slipping a few sickles onto the counter for your sweets. "just a friendly piece of advice."
and with that, you turned on your heel and walked out of the shop, your heart pounding in your chest, a sick sense of satisfaction swirling in your stomach. you knew you had probably just signed your own death warrant, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care.
it was time theo made a choice.
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