#no hate to the chill fans (love you guys) but man some people took it too far

[phatcatphergus]

I’m going to be toxic and salty for a second but I was thinking about how even though his event is stressful, it’s not NEARLY as bad as last purgatory and then I did a meaningful glance at the severe lack of a specific team and specific teams stans this event

[jajasmiinee]

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bf!matt sturniolo

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warnings: fluff, kisses, swearing, cringe, little bit of dirty talk haha

y/n

matt

chris

nick

english is not my first language so i'm terribly sorry if there's any english error

enjoyyy!

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bf!matt - would be very touchy with you

you're filming a deaf, mute or blind with the triplets. you're mute chris's blind, nick's deaf and your boyfriend, matt's also blind. you're now mixing the batter because chris and nick is arguing at the back. while matt is searching for you. you gasp a little when you felt matt's hands wrape around your waist. "ohh here you are lovee!" matt giggled. you slap matt hands when he began to caresses your thigh, you don't want the fans to get crazy about it. making him pout.

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bf!matt - shower you with kisses, even in public

you and matt are at the store. just filming a short vlog for matt's own youtube. when you're talking to the camera, matt wouldn't stop kissing your head. "mfh.. matt, stoppp" you chuckles "no" matt kisses you passionately. well, you doesn't really mind if matt wants to kiss you there, but at least alone, not in the store. especially now you're filming.

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bf!matt - would post you everytime he wanted to

you're at LA right now while matt including his brothers are in Boston. You need to get some work done so you didn't follow them, to your surprised. when you were about to go to sleep, matt has mentioned you in his story. a picture of you smiling so brightly while holding a white cat with a caption ‘missing her ❤️ @y/nacc’ "aawh" you said "how sweet!"

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bf!matt - wouldn't let you wear such a thing

you're going to a party alone. you wear a short red dress. you think that dress were really pretty, well, matt thought otherwise "where you think you're going, kid?" matt leans against the door, crossing his arm with a raised eyebrow. "i already told you, i'm going to the party" you reply "with THAT dress?" you look at your dress "is there something wrong?" you were confused, matt doesn't usually ask about what she wore "that dress is too short sweetheart. do you want to seduce someone at the party?" matt ask "noo?" you scoff "why do you care so much?" "why do i care so much? girl change your clothe fuck that dress wears something else okay? i don't want other man to see you in that!" matt took your hands to the wardrobe "ugh fineee!" you rolled your eyes

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bf!matt - would invite you to almost all the video

"guys, y/n is coming today" matt said to nick and chris "whattt? agaiiinnnn?" chris replied "why? do you hate her or something?" matt raised an eyebrow "no, it's just that she almost in all our video. but it's not that i hate her. i loveeee it when she's with us!" chris chuckles "i know right. i love her humor" said nick

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bf!matt - would always satisfied your cravings

it's now 3 am and you, matt at the living room just chilling. when there's suddenly you came across a buldak mukbang. making you hungry. you make an eye contact with matt, you did the cutest eyes ever to tell him that you wanted something "ah.. what do you want baby?" matt ask, smiling "can i have buldak ramen pleaseee?" you whine "of course. anything for you" matt got up and pick up his keys, ready to go to the store

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bf!matt - who would ban or block any people that's rude to you on the internet

matt are streaming with you while nick and chris are sleeping. while you were talking to the camera, matt notices a chat saying ‘gosh, y/n is so annoying’ matt took a glance at your face before saying "fuck you. bye bitch" banning the person permanently from the stream "hm? fuck who, baby?" you ask in confusion "nothing sweetheart. the only one i fuck is you" matt replied with a wicked grin "shut up" you rolled your eyes

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bf!matt - who's turned on when you wear his clothes

you came out of the shower while matt is playing fortnite. you go tap matt shoulder to tell him that you're done. "matt, i'm done" you said "ye- oh" matt eyes were glued onto your body. you wore his black hoodie with his boxers "maaattt?" you wave infront of matt, seeing him lost in his mind making your confused "uh yea?" matt finally back into reality "go to the shower" you smiles "y'know what.. i have something else to do.." matt smirk before lifting you up, throw you onto the bed "matt!" you chuckles "yes?" matt pins you down

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bf!matt - who would lend his shoulder to cry on

"hiks hiks.." loud sobs eco the room "there, there .." matt rub your back softly "w-why did they do that..?" you hugged matt tightly "i told you.. they're a bad friends. see why now?" matt caresses your hair "y-you're right.." "now.. cry all your want okay? i'm always here" matt kisses your cheeks

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bf!matt - who will buy your favorites flowers everytime

"what's you favorite flower?" matt ask "tulips. pink tulips. why?" you look into matt blue eyes "nothing" and since then, everytime you felt sad or happy or angry or anytime. he would bring pink tulips and when you ask him. he replied with "just because. i'm your boyfriend"

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bf!matt - he always knew when you're having a panick attack

you're filming a vlog with the triplets. you sat beside matt at the restaurant. while nick are talking to the camera, your eyes lingering around. your breath shortened, your heartbeat getting faster, your hands shaking. hoping that one of them notices your sudden movement and thankfully, matt does "shh.. shh.." matt took your hands and caresses them "breath in.. and out.. repeat" matt helps you with your breathing, he knew that the breathing technique really helps you out "thanks sweetheart" you hugged him "always for you"

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late post

[kerubimcrepin]

Wakfu Season 3, Episodes 1-6

//tw mentions of SA

Episode 1 - Fallen Heroes

I had a very long discussion with a friend of mine, who is a fan of medical settings, about how cool the existence of IV within the lore of Krosmoz is.

We didn't come to any conclusion. It was just us fanboying about this. Because my friend loves medical things and I love putting character into situations (some of which would not be survivable, if them being put on IV wasn't possible) (big fan of the concept of Joris getting poisoned and very sick and Kerubim and Atcham freaking the fuck out).

Funnily enough, during the making of my YouTube series, I discovered that there are two Sram-venerating women named Toxine in this franchise.

Adamai harbouring feelings of violence towards the members of the brotherhood is a good idea, (<- obviously the guy that wants Joris to beat the shit out of Kerubim would say this), but man, it could have been so cool if someone competent was working with this idea.

Episode 3 - Oropo's Tower

I should admit, this moment was probably a big win for Tristepin Mental Illness fans. Also, this is sadly the most explicit they can get with the reasons why Tristepin might hate being the Iop god in a cartoon.

He has plenty of reasons. Not only had Iop had 394824 demigods who hated him and felt abandoned by him while suffering fates worse than death (all gods have those) and just as many mortals he took advantage of using the power imbalance of godhood and promises of love (all gods have done that), he also canonically sexually assaulted a woman.

Ngl, if I was Tristepin, I would be considering killing myself — however, the kids and the wife would be sad.

They shuoild do this to Yugo too. He also had other wives. Albeit in an infinitely less insane way than Tristepin. Ankama.., please stop ignoring how existentially horrifying the Eliatrope demigods are.

In the Dofus MMO Kerubim pretty much calls the brotherhood of the forgotten an emo club of people with too much free time on their hands doing nothing but whining about their daddy issues.

And he was so real for that.

Btw canonically, Mishelle/Coqueline makes him feel intimidated (due to her grand age) while she herself doesn't really care about him (besides liking his good attitude towards animals), and is actually besties with Otomai.

Episode 4 - Beastly Girl

I like to headcanon that Joris's relationship with Coqueline is that he projects onto her ("oh god.... being 7 forever would make me kill myself.... even being 3ft tall is already horrible and makes me want to die..... the poor woman must be suffering") while she's like,, 1. probably doesn't think of herself as a "woman". I think she would describe herself as a creature, maybe a girlcreature, and 2. is literally chilling and doesn't give a single shit about anything but animal welfare and direct anti-god action.

I think talking to her would kill Joris because he'd realize that not every immortal person is as insecure about Literally Everything as he is.

She literally says, "the only good gods are ex-gods". We stan a leftist girlcreature?

This screenshot can be used as a reaction image for so many different shows. More fictional parents should say "my child is NOT ascending to godhood and shedding their mortality, becoming something beyond my comprehension, before they're of age. Fuck you."

Episode 5 - A Iop Hides Himself to Cry

You want to read @bitter-panacea's analysis posts about Goultard so bad.

Despite my negative feeling on s3, this is a WIN for Goultard fans, as far as I'm aware. (and Goultard enjoyers, since I kinda consider myself one)

I;'m going to walk into the sea.

Episode 6 - The Ecaflip's Scratching Post

YEAH BABY, A FULL ON IN-SHOW CONFIRMATION OF MY "USH HAS A DIFFERENT MOM THAN KERUBIM AND ATCHAM" HYPOTHESIS.

This might not seem like a contentious issue to normal people. Gods have... a lot of different lovers, so it seems normal to assume that Ush has one mom, while Kerubim and Atcham are twins like Eleley and Flopin, and have a different mom...

But a cancelled game that Tot really liked and still considers canon had really weird "there's an Ecaflip priestess who is the CEO of Giving Birth" lore, and was planned to be the mysterious mom of Kerubim and Atcham (and many other demigods), which contradicts a lot of previously established lore (ankama LOVES retcons. sadly).

I am quite open about thinking this is stupid and not considering this canon until they show her to me in an actual released media (and even then I will find a way to headcanon a better reality). Seeing the series itself acknowledge that Ush is not Atcham and Kerubim's full brother makes me feel quite better.

Hi Ush were you doing [SEXUAL ACTS REDACTED] upon cats again.

Cute...

A normal thing for a Bontarian to do. Blue-clad (metaphorically, he isn't wearing blue but white. Still very Bontarian though) man over here protecting kids and women. While also beating them up.

But unironically, I think it's cute that he has this gap moe of being an evil man who also saves people and cares about honour (because that's a proper thing to do) despite cheating constantly.

Somehow, his shallowness and "I mostly care about appearances, even if I do have a moral code" sort of behaviour is just as Extremely Bontarian as Joris's.... 30 mental illnesses.

THE OST IN THIS EP IS SO GOOD. ECAFLIP FANS WINNING ONCE AGAIN.

Hey past me! Maybe he really does pay these cats to put up with his insane behaviours. 🤨

Yugo, I'm gonna be real with you:

he's probably heard Joris and Kerubim say these exact words at least twice before,

He is reallllllly weird about cats and I am unsure if that's illegal in your setting,

He lured in people to kill in his tower for sport serial killer style.

He's bontarian. -20 morality and honor points immediately.

[confusedspaceotter]

TUA seaon 4 recap because fuck Netflix

Hi if you are reading this welcome to I hate Steve Blackman/Netflix but I still wanna know what happened in The Umbrella Academy season 4 club, couple things I should probably warn you before we begin

spoilers ahead(just in case you didn’t read the title this IS the pissing on the poor website

I will be very angry and biased because Netflix took the wife and kids i will hate this guy forever I’m really good at remembering a grudge(no hate to the cast tho they did their very best and defo deserve more

In this recap I will go over the main plots of season 4 with a brief mention of the side plots, do beware some of the plot/shit characters did makes absolutely no sense but hey I'm just the messenger please be mad at Netflop for that

Season 4 Episode 1, The Unbearable Tragedy of Getting What You Want(aka us getting season 4 but only 6 episodes)

After loosing their powers when they came back to the main timeline last season, the brellies have lived the past 6 years somewhat peacefully, Luther is a stripper now, Diego and Lila is married with 3 kids, Allison is now a B list celebrity living with Claire, Klaus is sober and a germaphobe, Five is working for the CIA(bro is too busy working to cut his hair i hate it), Ben is a crypto scammer who just got out of prison, Viktor owns a bar and keeps getting dumped by girls(sure whatever)

The new big bad this season is a pair of wacky scientists named Gene and Jean, they are the leader of this cult called The Keepers who are trying to make “The Cleanse” happen, which is just a fancy name for the apocalypse.

Okay so basically this episode Vikor got kidnapped by random guy(I’m not even gonna mention his name he’s just here for plot so I don’t care about him) on his way to Diego and Lila’s kids birthday party, the siblings go and rescue him, random guy said hey actually i'm a big fan of yall if you can rescue my daughter Jennifer from a remote location I will be forever grateful, the group was like nah we are actually powerless now but Five was like wait we are doing this your welcome because he found a bottle of marigold(the thing that gives them their powers) in the belongs of the missing daughter, after this they went to dinner and Ben drugged everyone (except Klaus coz he didn't drink it) with the Marigold so now they are gonna get their powers back.

there's also this side plot where Lila and Five went undercover to investigate The keepers, Lila didn't tell Diego so he thought Lila was cheating on him with some guy whos actually just Five(buddy you are not gonna believe this in like 4 episodes this came true I hate it here)

Season 4 Episode 2, Jean and Gene(they were a cute couple but they will NEVER be Hazel and Cha Cha)

After they got their powers back they went to find random guy but he's missing, leaving a hint about New Grumpson, Maine so the siblings went there roadtrip style(their car also blasting baby shark non stop its not relevant to the plot i just think is funny), the siblings arrived to this small town, Ben was like you know what I’m done with yall bye, when he tries to leave he met Jennier in disguise, they have a chat, fall in love immediately(talk about speed dating am i right), the towns people learned that the siblings are here for Jennier so they pull the guns out and starts shooting,turns out they are all working for deadbeat dad of the century Reginbald Flopgreeves, so the siblings fight with their new and slightly improved superpowers(that apparently drained the vfx budget because the final big bad is ugly asf??? the same show that gives us Pogo?? whatever man)

Meanwhile Klaus was chilling in the car, a fake Jennifer who's pretending to be the real Jennifer asks Klaus for help, then shoots him before the siblings can stop her, Klaus told the siblings he doesn't want to get his powers back and dies, but Allison don’t take no for an answer and water board klaus with the marigold, Klaus came back from the dead, and then Jean and Gene crash into the siblings, kidnapping Jennier.

Back to the Lila Diego Five cheating side plot (ugh), during the roadtrip, Diego tells Five he thinks Lila is cheating on him, Five is like don't worry about it buddy it won’t happen for another 3 episodes (okay the last part was me but Five did tell Diego it’s probably nothing) and Lila overheads their conversation and thank Five for not exposing her GIRL JUST TELL YOUR HUSBAND STOP BEING SHADY *sigh*

Oh and Five keeps teleporting to this subway station that have trains going to different timelines but we never found out who the fuck build this so dont ask me idk either

Season 4 Episode 3, The Squid and the Girl (The plot and the holes because nothing makes any sense anymore)

We start with a flashback to young Jennifer being rescued from giant squid but WE NEVER GOT THE EXPLINATION GIRL WHY ARE YOU INSIDE THAT FUCKING SQUID so we are just gonna move on focus people we are half way though the season shit is about to go down(unfortunately)

After Jean and Gene kidnapped Jennifer, the siblings starting doing what they do best, arguing with each other, this is when Klaus give us the greatest summary of the show,

Klaus then leaves the group, Ben also was like nah fam im out for real and then leaves. The remaining siblings decided to split into two groups, Five Diego Lila went to The Keepers HQ to investigate, Viktor Luthor Allison went to find dear old dad Reggaeton Hargriefs. So Diego finds out that The Keepers have a document about Brellie!Ben’s death aka The Jennifer Incident.

Ben who’s getting tf out, discovers he got hand mouth foot disease with rgb red lights on his hand(see kids this is why you don't touch hands with girls before you get married) random guy pops out and was like bro did you find my daughter, Ben was like yeah I did and I also fall in love with her, random guy was like good good now use your squidar to find her so Ben did just that and rescue Jennifer from Jean and Gene.

For Viktor Luther Allison, they went to a giant mansion that their father owns, expecting to have to fight their way in, but the guards there are like, ah yes master Vikor please welcome in we have been waiting for you, turns out in this timeline Abigail, Rickroll Harkonnen’s wife was still alive and is the one who runs the house + her husband, so the kids were like ma’am your husband is a dick to us in another timeline can you tell him to shut up and help us, she agreed and he obeyed.Now the kids(Luther Allison Diego and Viktor) are putting on their thinking caps to restore their memory of The Jennifer Incident(because dead old dad erased their memory of it talk about childhood erasure)

*sigh* so the Five Diego Lila subplot, when Diego was investigating in the Keepers HQ, Five and Lila blink to the subway station, they got on a train and went to the original apocalypse but five was just like meh guess this wasn’t THAT traumatic pffff I only got stuck here for 40 years no biggie anyway time to get on the train and go home I guess, this shouldn’t affect me in any shape of form given that you know I’m so calm and collected when I first got here :))))))))) yes i'm being sarcastic NO ONE should be this calm and collected here okay.

Diego and Lila also talk things out, Lila apologizes and then says she wants to take a break from their marriage(sure lady whatever

no im NOT even gonna mention what Klaus has been up to, for me he went home to Claire bear and talk shit out with her end of story.

Season 4 Episode 4, The Cleanse (maybe why the Keepers what to make the cleanse happen so badly is because they saw ep 5 and be like nope go to hell yall)

We got a flashback to what happened with brellie!Ben, turns out he was murder by Regglodocus Hippocampus, our beloathed deadbeat dad of the century on a mission where the umbrella academy is securing a package(Jennifer in a box) but they touch hands so bro just straight up kills them both in front of the siblings(bro can we delete you from existence I hate this man with a passion)

The siblings are obviously pissed, AbiFail then explained that it's not her asshole husbands fault, years ago she created the marigold and unknowingly also created Durango, when these two particles touch hands, its gonna end the world for the billionth time(aka the cleanse), this also what happened to their homeworld, and it's gonna end earth if they don't separate Ben and Jennifer(because she got a shitton of durango in her).

Ridiculous Hepatitis then said we must go to kill one of them to stop the world from dying and Viktor is like NOT ON MY WATCH I WILL SAVE BEN and they have a little showdown, Vikor wins(duh) and they are like let's just check this crime scene Ben created last episode when he came to save Jennier okayyy.

The siblings got there + flop dad, Lila told Five hey what if we go back in time with the trains and stop the Jennifer incident from happening in the first place and five is like alright bet, but we cant tell Diego for plot reasons so Imma tell my CIA boss to take Luther and Diego to CIA HQ and babysit them( sis just tell him Diego might be a dumbass but he’s a dumbass that listens smh)

Anyway the siblings split into teams again, Viktor and Renaissance Harrypotter went to track Ben and Jennifer, Five and Lila got on the time train, Luther and Diego were at the CIA, Allison went to save Klaus from the TUA writers.

oh and Ben and Jennier fucks and it kills everyone within the radius lmao

Season 4 Episode 5, Six years, Five months, and two days ( just end my suffering rn)

We start with a montage of Five and Lila being stuck in train hell, unable to find the right train home so they are kinda just traveling from timelines to timelines, they decide to stop and stay in one of them with a strawberry farm(ew), and the most terrible thing ever fucking happend, apprently in these six years they caught feelings and they kissed fucking hell son of the bitch steve blakman I am in your fucking walls I fucking hate it here why can’t good thing last fuck off five would NEVER do this to his siblings this motherfucker spend 40 years and the entirety of season two trying to save his siblings why the fuck would he kiss his sister in law I hate it here

also #justicefordolores

BUT this isnt it

One day he went out for scraps and he found his old note book with the instructions on how to get home, he stashes it and only tell Lila about it 5 fucking months later

5 FUCKING MONTHS

I don't even know what to say let's just get over it okay

so yeah after this they call things off and just went home

Back to Vikor, he calls Ben with the help of dad and tells him hey buddy you have to stop the world and stop your feelings for Jennifer because you are gonna end the world if you stay with her, Ben refuses saying that he’s never been better(sure buddy) Ben and Jennifer plans to run away but Jennifer felt sick so they stop and went to a random mall to hide/ask for help.

Luther and Diego did absolutely nothing in CIA HQ and they realized they were being babysat so they dipped, oh and they also fought a bunch of people in the process which is cool I guess.

Season 4 Episode 6, End of the Beginning(thank fuck is over I’m freeee)

The Keepers are guarding the mall that Ben and Jennifer are in because they are stupid. Viktor and dad arrived at the scene, Viktor convinced dad to let him extract the durango out of Ben so he doesn’t have to kill him, dad said yeah sure whatever man, so Viktor sneaks in the building.

Meanwhile the rest of the siblings gathered at Lila and Diego’s house, Diego clock those cheating bitches immediately and Diego confronts Lila and she finally confesses but before he could beat the shit out of Five, they saw what's going on with Ben on the news and went to the mall.

Vikor got into the building, Ben is now a glowing clay human hybrid(ewwwww

Vikor tries to extract the durango out of Ben but he ran out of time, Dad’s sniper shoots Ben but before it hits, Jennifer and Ben touch hands for one last time and they transforms into ugly cgi clay monster big bad of the season(like wtf is this

the sibling starts fighting the Bennifer monster, Diego and Five didn’t get the memo so they fought each other instead.

So yeah we are fucked, AbiFail told Ratsass Hankercheif shes the one behind the keepers and she’s trying to right her wrongs by ending the world this way(selfish prick) and Reggie said alight that defo excuses every shitty thing you do man I got a really good wife and they both got sucked into the Bennifer monster(your redemption arc flopped btw I still hate you)

The siblings went back to the academy, thinking about what they can do to stop the Bennifer monster, Five went to the train station again, and discovers a deli run by other Fives, and one of the five told him babes, we are NEVER gonna succeed in stopping the apocalypse because the timeline is broken(it's only supposed to be one) and the existence of marigold is what shattered the timeline so we gotta gotta get sucked into the Bennifer monster and volia marigold + durango = kaboom(they will cancel each other out) BUT the siblings will cease to exist(coz their mum got exposed to marigold and birthed them so no marigold no siblings)

Lila and Allison decided to ship their children and family to the train station and send them on one of the trains to create a paradox I mean to protect them and the siblings got absorbed by the Bennifer monster, the timeline was fixed, none of us are happy, we ended up worse than we started.

The END.

hope yall are okay after reading this, no hate towards the cast whatsoever I 100% blame the writer and Netflix for this , fuck them and uh here’s a virtual hug to yall, peace out.

[nimhrudd]

Welcome Home A.R.G Crackcanons

Wally definitely feigns innocence because he’s the main character who has to “learn” with the audience

It’s canon that he thinks he’s handsome and enjoys admiring himself in the mirror, so he 100% knows about the simps and is super smug about it

With his soft voice and gentle demeanor, he really fits the “darling” reputation

Despite this, I do genuinely believe he’s a good person and means the best. My personal theory is that Home is manipulating Wally in some way to do their bidding.

(I picture Wally being manipulated by Home is a euphemism for paternal manipulation and depression. But that’s just a theory. A GAME THEORY-)

He strikes me as someone that everyone WANTS to be submissive, but is actually a very dominant

Barnaby and Frank have a SpongeBob-Squidward relationship

Barnaby goes out of his way to annoy Frank

Frank can respect the effort, but would never admit it

Barnaby calls Frank “Frankfurter” much to Frank’s dismay

Barnaby is Sans from UnderTale I don’t make the rules

A very easy-going, morally grey kinda guy. Super chill person who’s always down to have a good time.

He rarely gets embarrassed or flustered. Nothing really catches him off guard

Except anything having to do with romance. If someone flirts with him his brain short-circuits

Which is funny considering he’s definitely one to flirt with someone jokingly

He gives everyone in town unique nicknames

Barnaby has a lovely singing voice. He mostly enjoys singing jazz. But mostly he sticks to stand-up comedy

Howdy is Barnaby’s biggest fan

Howdy has control over the store radio and whenever there are no customers, he turns on hardcore rock. But you’d never know because he wears the same smile no matter the situation

You’d think that with all those legs that Howdy would be a klutz. On the contrary, he’s quite elegant and light-footed

Julie isn’t a klutz either, but she’s super forgetful. Head-in-the-clouds kinda person

Despite this, she always remembers the tiniest details about the most random things (ADHD lookin’ ah)

She’s definitely someone to collect rocks that she thinks are cool or feel nice on her hands

Her love language is touch but she hates being touched without permission

This leads to a few disputes between herself and Frank

Frank is the opposite tho. He acts like he hates being touched but he’s touchstarved

The only people allowed to touch him are Eddie and Julie

Sometimes Barnaby tries to touch Frank in subtle ways just to annoy him. (Such as noogying his head or poking his sides)

Frank LOVES bouncy, squishy stuff. It just scratches his brain just right

On the other hand, he HATES stuff that sticks to him.

For example, I imagine he’d be head over heels at the discovery of oobleck but would steer clear of glitter or anything that clings with static electricity

Because of the mentioned above, Frank has a VERY specific taste in clothing. He just hates the feel of certain fabrics

Knew he was in love with Eddie when the mailman was running to him happily, mail in hand, only to trip and face plant in the mud. Despite this, Eddie didn’t stop smiling

Himbo makes tsundere heart go brrrr

Neither one confessed to each other for AGES so Julie took it upon herself to put them into awkward situations

Cue Poppy “intervening”

Speaking of Poppy, she’s the resident mom-friend. Makes sure everyone’s taking care of themselves physically and emotionally

Despite this she always forgets to take care of herself

Poppy is SUCH a proud LGBT+ mom. Her house is a safe haven for the gays. I don’t make the rules

She’s a tall, elegant, lady, so she swoons at gentle ladies trying to sweep her off her feet

Literally such a sweetheart I love Poppy

Whereas Frank knows all the technical and sensical facts, Poppy is more worldly and wise. She’s been around the coop, so to speak

Im convinced Poppy knows everything about EVERYONE and spreads gossip just for the benefit of her neighbors

(For example she spread rumors that Frank was going to her house to get an engagement ring for Eddie. This wasn’t true, but it lead to both Frank AND Eddie barging into her house for an explanation. She simply placed two cups of tea and a tray of cookies and left them alone in the living room)

Barnaby likes to call her “Cupid” because of this

Poppy always shows up to one of her Neighbor’s events, whether it’s a show for Barnaby or a casting call for Sally

Sally loves the support of peacock mom

Sally writes all her own plays, but makes money by sending in her own transcripts under a pen name

She’s actually very famous under her pen name and is torn between revealing herself to the world and staying mysterious

Sally decides to remain anon so that she can focus on her acting

Spent years in the night sky, watching all the people in town and all their shenanigans. Many years passed before she could work up the courage to come down to introduce herself

Incredible actress, but she has social anxiety and is much calmer outside of a play

Adversely, once she’s got an idea, she’s ALL IN. All her brain cells go into that ONE project or idea, and she ends up dragging everyone along with her. A one track mind, if you will

Sally always casts herself as the lead, but if there are any other main characters or main antagonists she ALWAYS casts Wally to play the part

This low-key offends Barnaby, because he loves a good villain and always wants to play the part of antagonist

Sally always asks Julie to help her make the backdrops

All of the neighbors have fears of some sort, except for Wally

It’s kind of freaky that he never seems to give people the reaction their looking for

But ye Wally has emotions, he’s just INCREDIBLE at masking them

Wally loves eye contact because he believes that eyes are the window to the soul

It’s also an assertiveness thing but no one would ever guess cuz of his cutesy face

Wally def has a staring problem but smooth-talks his way out of any awkward situation that could come from it

Wally is demisexual. Though he loves people easily in the friendly sense, it takes a LONG time for him to fall for someone romantically. But once he does, it’s over for his love interest cuz he’ll become clingy AF

Barnaby is the opposite. He’s very in tune with his emotions and knows immediately when he likes someone. He just chooses to avoid the crap out of them as soon as he realizes. He just gets too embarrassed. I personally headcanon him as asexual

Julie is genderfluid and very similar to Wally. Though she isn’t demi, she loves all kinds of people equally. So it just takes a minute for her to decipher whether or not she loves someone NORMALLY or MORE than a friend.

Poppy is a classy lady who’s looking for a fellow lady to spend her life with. Since she’s got some experience, she’d probably take pride in playing the waiting game. Some subtle touches here, some lingering eye contact there… it’s a slow burn ladies and gents.

Frank is someone who prefers men (specifically Eddie. Good thing the feelings mutual.) likes his men dumb and well meaning.

Eddie prefers men as well. Specifically men who are serious and well read.

Howdy is pansexual, but isn’t really looking for a relationship due to his business.

Sally feels kinda like another asexual to me. But she’d like to be in a relationship with a friend. Like get married and share a life together without all the romancey stuff

Julie and Frank both have the same love language - physical touch. But in different ways as said earlier

Frank also prefers Acts of Service, like Howdy

Poppy enjoys gift giving

Sally and Barnaby enjoy words of affirmation

Wally is a casual Quality Time enjoyer

[taehyungfirst]

So I am a new fan of Tae, I find him extremely talented and unique and I am thoroughly enjoying his new project. But I've been stumbling across a lot of posts about him, saying some really mean and nasty things which I find really awkward and confusing. Is there something specific he has done to make some people dislike him so much because so far he just seems like a quirky individual who clearly loves music a whole lot and seems to be having the time of his life with his new solo era.

I also have noticed that he is really selfless about sharing the spotlight with the people he works with and everyone around him seems genuinely happy and in good spirits to be working with him which means he is probably a genuinely nice guy.

I know every celebrity has people who criticize and hate on them and we don't all need to like his music. But the kind of hate V gets is so random and uncalled for because so far he just seems like a really a fun and likeable artist who is trying to stay true to himself.

Also he is constantly talking about how important it was for him to show people who he genuinely is with this project. Which makes these comments even more mean-spirited because what's wrong with being a chill, laid back guy who loves his dog dearly and makes the kinda music and art he likes instead of what's going to bring in the highest numbers?

Hi anon! First of all, welcome to the Taehyungie world I hope you’re having fun and enjoying yourself with the big amount of contents we are getting.

Regarding your question, Taehyung became the kpop punching bag for a while now, I think it started in 2021? Or maybe 2020 when people claimed he changed when he just was going through a hard period (that he also opened up about);

Taehyung is one of the most genuine people in the industry, he got friends everywhere and everyone always says how much comfortable is being around him. He also got an incredible emotional intelligence that allows him to react in the best ways to situations, this is why he never took any shit from anyone and always knew how to protect what was important to him. And this bothers people, the fact that he’s so unbothered that he’s just out there enjoying his jazz music and his puppy, that he protects his peace and just wants to create create create as an artist and nothing else, that he doesn’t give in to provocation but he’s still the same passionate, happy, introspective man.

He’s also quite literally undraggable and I’m not saying it because I’m biased, but he’s an excellent singer (got the most unique voice and is the best baritone in the whole kpop industry), he can flawlessly dance, he can act, he can write his songs, he can do anything he wants and this also bothers people so they try to fight ghosts and you see dumb posts about him (like some €xo stan tried to drag him for freestyling on slow dancing or because he’s friend with Bada Lee)… My sincere advice is to ignore everything you see because Taehyung never did anything to get all this hate, I wish his company would protect him more but that’s a topic for another day, just keep supporting him and his music and enjoy everything you get I’m sure we will get lots of funny contents soon! 💖

[beautifulpersonpeach]

BPP!!!! Are you excited for new jeans’ comeback? ☺️

***

It’s the only reason I wake up and go back to sleep at night tbh…

But more seriously? Yeah, I’m stoked.

NewJeans has been putting out some of the most thought-provoking and truly creative media pieces I’ve ever seen in k-pop. Like, man, if NewJeans is what happens when the creative mind of Min Heejin isn’t stifled by Lee Sooman, Yoo Youngjin, and the other male suits at SM who have such a tight chokehold on everything coming out of that company, then we all have one more reason to thank providence for our good fortune.

Every. Single. Song. in their discography is a bop and a half. The creative direction and execution in both Ditto and OMG MVs is one for the books. There isn’t a single girl group that is doing what they’re doing right now despite all the clones and concept/aesthetic redirections we’ve seen since NewJeans debuted.

NMIXX has shelved their mixpop sound a la O.O and TANK for now, going by their latest comeback. They moved to a more easy-listening poppy sound.

I lost count of all the SM stans in my GC asking where the hell Kwangya went in Aespa’s last comeback. It seemed they too shifted their aesthetic to a more casual (and less meta forward) expression of their overall concept.

As a few examples.

They can try to borrow or apply a vibe here, a Y2K outfit theme there, and chill-hop sound for half the album there, and still NewJeans seems like the most authentic expression of what they are.

And that alone is incredibly rare for a girl group less than a year old. NewJeans has crafted a definitive sound identity. If someone says a song sounds like NewJeans, everyone knows what they mean, most people like all their songs, and yet none of the songs in their small discography sound the same way.

And so, yes I’m excited. But, because this is k-pop and I’ve seen this movie before, I’m even more curious to see what fantastic reveals and ‘I don’t know if it’s just me…’ takes that will fuel the hate train this time.

(I mean, k-pop stans are nothing if not predictable and I bet you your left kneecap they’ve found their next favourite boogeyman in the NJ-MHJ-HYBE connection)

*

That nasty business during The Little Mermaid promotions was sad to see. The fact Danielle got hate from Korean k-pop stans for taking the role (after she auditioned for it mind you), and then Western k-pop stans claimed the racist comments from Korean forums towards Halle were from NewJeans stans (never mind it was posted on a page with the same people hating on Danielle)… that was a kind of low I hadn’t seen in a long while.

There’s a special sort of depravity I’ve observed in k-pop stans, and nothing brings it out quicker than a highly anticipated comeback from a well-loved group that everyone was supposed to hate.

So, yeah. Fun times ahead.

TMI, I once went as Miss Sara Bellum to a corporate Halloween party. The outfit was a fan favourite with the guys and gals and I landed three deals for my team that night, but I’m not certain it was worth it. My fro took weeks to recover from the bleach and hair dye. In fact, 3/10. Would not recommend.

Anyway,

Jungkook will be releasing his EP in July/August as well, and I’m praying to the gods for Itzy’s sake that JYP finally know what they’re doing when they comeback around that time too.

Just more happenings in the boring world of k-pop.

[askamnesiamoonjumper]

part two of this:

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

everyone say hello at my bushcat :) her name is Maple.

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

Thank you for all the kind replies! ^^ to celebrate I’m letting Maple share some words of wisdom:

6)nvd .,c-%@#0”sxmlkp. d

Truly inspiring.

804 notes

🩻 thesnatcher Follow

you all should send my sister anonymous hate it would be funny

🩻 thesnatcher Follow

NOT ME YOU FOOLS

#MY PLAN IS BACKFIRING

5045 notes

⌛️ahatintimekeeper Follow

I dont think that snatcher realizes that people just pecking hate him

#hatchat

5 notes

🌠corgiquest5fan Follow

YOOOO CHAT I GOT SO MUCH CORGI MERCH FROM THE SHOPS IN NYAKUZA TODAY ILL POST IT L8TER BUT THIS IS SO RAD HOLY SHIT DUDE IM SO EXCITED!!1!

15 notes

anonymous asked: Um you do realize putting “Domesticated the Snatcher” in your bio is hella creepy right? Like it’s weird as fuck to dehumanize an already demonized species like ghosts are people too. You’re already disrespecting the dead with that but it’s especially weird seeing as he’s literally an actual murderer on top of that? Like taking away the ghost thing that’s even creepy to say about a fucking serial killer as well. Like. What the fuck man. Actually what is wrong with you??

🌷identifying-flowers-in-posts Follow

6360 notes

🐇 bunnything-official Follow

“what’s your gender” ermmmm im silly?

6490 notes

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

Godssss if I have to see one more post about the lost prince of subcon I’m going to break the moon again /j

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

like not just posts talking about him but ones that are just blatantly wrong or infactual but I can’t be too mad because no one knows what really happened hardly but STILL. thank stars I killed him by transitioning but STOP PUTTING HISTORY ARTICLES ABOUT HIM ON MY DASH!! PLEASE!!!!

407 notes

Anonymous asked: WAIT WHAT?????? Amy did you???? Know the lost Prince of Subcon?????? Also what’s the context of the transition thing? What????

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

go talk to @ thesnatcher about it because I don’t care about that guy anymore (referring to the prince, not snatcher, love u ^^🩵❤️(i want to trap him in the horizon sometimes))

1094 notes

anonymous asked: YOUR SISTER IS THE FUCKING SUBCON PRINCE WHAT THE FUCK???????????????????????

🩻 thesnatcher Follow

oh gods what happened why are we talking about this GET OUT OF MY ASKS.

5800 notes

anonymous asked: Amy why did you say to talk to your brother and not you?????

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

…because he’s the prince too…? I thought everyone knew this??

🩻 thesnatcher Follow

MOON YOU DID NOT JUST OUT ME TO ALL YOUR FOLLOWERS WHAT THE HELL

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

WHAT HUH I THOUGHT THAT WAS A KNOWN FACT? IS IT NOT? 9045 notes

🏞️ doyoulovethecoloroftheskyline Follow

3006 notes

🐇bunnything-official Follow

STOPPPP MY BOSSES DO NOT WANT ME TO HELP THEM MAKE A HORROR DOCUMENTARY ABOUT SNATCHER OH MY CLOTHHHHHHHH BYEEEEEEE

anyway happy day for subcon history fans i guess :p, so sad no one knows i was the one who cracked moonies egg but wat ever *kicks rock and walks away with head lowered + tail dragging behind meoh stitch i just reread the top half of the post for a microsecond i lived in a world where my bosses didnt pitch that idea to me it was so beautiful

470 notes

💠 Jermeow Follow

856 notes

🎆mjs-hideout Follow

shady-sunburntdeactivated03122017 is both my best friend (wrote pretty accurate books on subcon history and spirits :)) and my worst enemy (wrote books on subcon history ft my deadname being everywhere in it)(I mean I suppose it is also my brothers name but it’s NOT MINE OK he can keep it)

409 notes

🌷identifying-flowers-in-posts Follow

Sorry we made your queer platonic ghost partner match with me. Yeah he took on my flower motifs and I took on his thorn motifs. Yeah we match to show our relationship. He’s chilled out now he’s not evil anymore but he’s still a massive bitch. Yeah. Yeah he’s biace too. Yeah, sorry. #about thorns #subconsnatcher

368 notes

[pastelwitchling]

I'm currently reading Crescent City, and I think I'm going to leave my thoughts on it here, starting with Part I. Disclaimer: I am actually enjoying this book, but I am also trudging through it for many reasons, so I won't hate on the book, but I will have negative critique, so if you can't handle seeing that, please don't keep reading. Also, there will be plenty of spoilers.

So here it is, Crescent City Part I, the good and the bad:

EXPOSITION. It's taking SO much energy for me just to read a chapter because the info dump is relentless. And I get it, this is the first book in the series, you've got to establish a few things, but almost ALL of the information comes in unnecessary moments when we don't need to know it. Until we see a character doing the Drop, I don't need two pages of explanation and history on it in the middle of a business meeting!

I really like how much of a party girl Bryce is, because it very much embraces that lifestyle and it's not another FMC who says she hates going out and parties, and yet is constantly persuaded into going anyway. Know what I mean? It's not some Mary Sue who can blame a night out on her friends. Bryce at least enjoys it, so I do appreciate that. A lot of people are about to hate me 😂 but I'm not a fan personally of a certain thing she does in the beginning, I don't think you should be normalizing that stuff, but I'm still early on in the book, so maybe they address it later.

There's a serious attempt here to make Bryce seem really out there with her outfits, and it feels a little out of place. The book keeps referring to her skintight dress and long legs, and I'm just like... she's going to a club? 😂 She works in a gallery? 😂 This is not a baffling wardrobe. Fran from The Nanny wore stuff like that all the time, and she's considered a fashion icon. It just feels like SJM is trying to tell us, Ooh, she's a real rebellious woman who dresses like no one else does, but... don't most people dress like that to a club? I have skintight dresses in rainbow colors, this isn't a wild outfit to wear, would all these characters chill? She's dressed fine 😂

Okay. I've never minded the use of male and female because in my mind, I've always equated them to masculine and feminine. However 😂 I have never seen these words used in such an insulting way as they are here. Male seems to be used synonymously to "pre*at*or" or "ty*ant", while female seems to be synonymously used to "sl*t" or "wh*re." It's... icky to me. They're so, so, sooo derogatory in this book, and I just can't stand this idea that if a man acts controlling or obsessive, or if a woman acts supposedly any less graceful than the Fae women or other Vanir (though I don't understand that logic either, since they're all awful, too), it's because it's in their blood? Because one is male and one is female and shudder...

On that note, Bryce is very prejudiced, in my opinion. Connor seemed like a good guy from all we've seen of him, and yet Bryce turns him down, despite having feelings for him, because he's a werewolf male, so he's bound to be controlling and try to take over her life. Class act there, Bryce.

I think Bryce walking in on Danika and the rest of the Pack of Devils was really, really, really well-written. Actually getting to the apartment took forever, but the moment she walks in to the end of Part I? Brilliant. I teared up, I ached with Bryce, you really feel with her pain and suffering, especially since we got that time with Danika and got to see their friendship and how much they cared about each other. Ugh, you just get it. She's shell-shocked, she's losing her grasp on reality, she's numb, she's disassociating, and it just all works so well.

Ithan... Ithan... what're you doing, Ithan? Why would you say that, Ithan? Bryce is your friend, Ithan. Don't turn on her, Ithan. She needs you, Ithan. Come on, Ithan, what the hell?

I liked Danika. She was clearly a mom friend, I loved how protective of Bryce she was, how much she clearly cared about her. Just very good.

I LOVED Hunt's introduction, I loved Hunt, I loved the one-sided interaction between him and Bryce, the way he felt for her without saying it, I loved Ruhn, I loved Isaiah; the men in this are so good so far... too bad they're male though, huh? Might be tough, fighting their natural inclination to be assholes 🤣

I love the way Bryce looks. I love that she's not this skinny girl, and also not this perfect hour glass figure, she's actually on the heavier side. I appreciate that.

I... want Sabine to stop living. She's... awful.

Why isn't Fury talking to Bryce anymore? Where'd she go? Fury, Bryce needs you now, girl 🥺

I really like how sexually free Bryce is. I think that's a nice touch. (rim shot) 😂😂😂

What was the point of Reid? Was there a point to him? This boyfriend she's had for two years, and all of a sudden during a bad dinner that she's always had to sit through, she decides she's had enough? It just felt so pointless, as far as I can see, there's been no need for him, at least not as this long-term boyfriend.

Anyway, that's pretty much it. I'm over 100 pages in, and outside of us finally getting the blurb and kicking off the plot, nothing's really happened. I'm hoping we're just getting all the exposition out of the way now in the first 10 chapters, and then we'll be done with that, because it's seriously getting in the way. Now that we've met Hunt, I feel excited to keep reading, see what happens with him and Bryce, and how the story moves forward.

[melanch0ly-gh0st]

Proving a Point

A dumb little gt thing I made about me and my friend, @your-local-snail based off a discord convo. Why? I dunno.

“Lol you’re gay L”

“Stfu”

Such was of the most intelligent conversations Caleb and Casey had on the daily. Caleb would spend their hours spewing idly online, running their mouth with ideas and concepts and idle chatter. For some reason, Casey would always think to respond.

It was a nice and calm summer evening in Florida. For once, the air wasn’t boiling, and was actually quite chilled, complementing the dim orange evening with a heavy spread of clouds overhead. It wouldn’t be long before the day was encompassed by them; it was already beginning to drizzle.

The perfect day to yell at the funny internet people.

“Boy kisser,” messaged Caleb, curled up in bed with his head against a mass of pillows, listening idly to the first raindrops hitting the house. As the words marched off into the digital ether, another met them at the gates, popping up on Caleb’s feed below them. “Shut the fuck up.”

Peak human intellect, displayed through this meager exchange between men.

“At least I’m not a boy kisser”

“Lie”

“You wanna kiss big men”

Caleb quickly writes out, “No I don’t.”

Another response comes just as fast.

“You want a big man to hold you”

“Nope”

Casey posts a picture. It’s artwork of a man, tall as a building, gently holding a tiny.

“You want this.”

“N”

“No I don’t”

He posts another, this time of one of Casey’s ocs.

“You want to wake up in his hand, don’t you”

“You fucking queer”

“NO”

“You want him to”

“NOPE”

“Ruffle your hair with a finger”

“STOP”

“And affirm you”

“NAH NO NOPE DHUT UP”

“You want him to”

“Tell you how much he loves you”

“And appreciates you”

“SHUT”

“You fucking queer”

“Gaybo”

“I’m going. To kill you”

“Then who will have gt conversations with you??”

“You fucking dumbass”

“I hate you”

“Love you too L”

Caleb sarcastically scowled at the messages.

Peak intellectual conversation.

Caleb leaned further into their spot in bed, nestled gently amongst their plush throne. Browsing through their YouTube search bar, they fished out one of their many favorite Lo-fi albums, filling the deep recesses of their skull with a relaxed tempo. Perfect for days like these… and for fighting an angry gay guy.

“Bitch”

They silently took in the pitter-patter of the rain outside, seeping cold into the room, multiplied yet by the fan blowing cold air over them. Almost made it feel like winter; a rarity in Florida, especially during the hottest months of the year. They shivered a bit in their blanket.

“God it’s cold here”

Casey, on the other end, reaponded with a measly “L”. Caleb was confused.

“Don’t we both like cold?”

“L”

“…”

“Okay then”

They shivered a bit more, pulling their blankets in a bit more.

“If only I had a big man to”

“Hold me and make me warm”

“I am literally right here?????”

“You’re a minor and also not a giant”

“I am offended”

Caleb laughed to themself.

“Am I wrong???”

“Yes”

“I am a very big man”

“Incorrect”

“Shortass”

“You ignorant queer”

Caleb wiggles in bed, burying their head further into the pillows.

“You’ve literally told me you’re short, asshole”

“No I didn’t”

He quickly goes and retrieves a message from earlier on in the week: “I’m a short bastard”

“Explain”

The message suddenly disappears. Tricky cock.

“Bitch”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about Caleb”

“Die”

“Bites you bites you bites you bites you b”

“:)”

“Y’know what fuck you you’re still not a giant”

“Bitch”

“Wrong I am. Very big”

“Short”

“Proof?”

“I will run all the way to California to prove you are short”

“Don’t need to”

“I am approaching rapidly”

“No you are on the other side of the country”

“Too bad L”

Caleb chuckled idly as they read the line out. Dumb humor like this was exactly that- dumb- but amazing. The best kind of thing for making someone like them lau-

thoom

The room suddenly shook. Once. Like someone struck the wall with a hammer.

Caleb sat up a bit when they felt it, the vibration shooting through their bones. Was that a gunshot? Did someone in the house knock over the grandfather clock or something? Wha-

thoom

There it was again.

Caleb stopped. What was that?

thoom

thoom

thoom

It was getting a little louder. And a little faster.

Caleb was on their feet fast, running to their window to see what was happening. Rain was pouring outside, but nothing was visible in the downfall that was out of the ordinary. Cars still drove by, people were shaken up a bit, but weren’t worried, and nothing seemed to shatter when-

thoom

thoom

THOOM

The rumbles felt like they were right over Caleb’s head, like at any second they might be trampled by something, crushing them and the house together. They continued to look about, but to no avail. Their family was at the casino for a bit, off doing their own thing. They were on their own.

The thooms grew louder and louder still, approaching faster and faster, until-

tap tap tap

They heard something on their house. Tapping. It was tapping.

They waited for a few seconds, heart pounding. There was silence after the taps, cutting into their thoughts as they tried rapidly to discern whether or not they should jump out the window.

Until, suddenly-

knock knock knock

Their door. Someone was knocking on their door. Granted, it still felt like manic banging, but when something just made a mad dash for your house and then tried to assault your roof, a knocking sounds far better.

Carefully, they left their room, saying hi to their cat, who was currently running around trying to dodge whatever was causing the noise, and made their way to the door. It wasn’t broken down like they thought it might be. In fact, most of the house looked fine; no damage; even though they shouldn’t really be surprised since there was no sound to indicate such.

They tried to peek through the doorhole, but was only met with a shadow, bigger than they could comprehend. They felt their heart skip a beat, their mind racing for an explanation only to be met with pure confusion. Was this an intruder? A wild animal? They didn’t wanna open the door, but some deep fear of the consequences screamed for them to turn the handle against their better judgment. They quickly poke their head out, trying to see what was up, when-

They look and see a leg. A very big leg. And a very big shoe.

And when they look up the leg, they see another leg, both in black shorts. And past the legs is a torso, covered with a blue t shirt with a blueberry on it. And higher up still is a pair of arms, a set of shoulders, and a head that-

They saw the face of that which came upon them. They’d seen it before, in pictures and a video. Their face changed from confusion and horror to utter scrutiny.

“Casey?”

Casey looked down at them with a smirk.

“Sup, shortass.”

Caleb looks them up and down. They have to be at least a solid eighty feet?

“Huh… I thought you’d be taller.”

The smirk turned into a scowl.

“Oh shut the fuck up-“

Little Caleb walked out at the sight of their friend standing at- over their doorway. Their shoe was enough to encapsulate and crush them. Big.

“How- How is this even possible?”

“What? I can’t be tall?”

“No, I mean-“

“Homophobe.”

Caleb stares at him.

“What?”

“What?”

The giant bent down, carefully bringing their face closer to the little blonde-haired white boy. Caleb could see the shimmer in his eyes.

“How did you even get over here? Or find my address?!”

“Walked over.”

“You walked over?”

“Mmmhm.”

“That doesn’t answer my second question.”

“Spite.”

“…”

Caleb and Casey stared at each other.

The giant pointed one, very large finger at them.

“Now look who’s the shorty. L.”

“I’m still confused, you… found my address… out of spite?”

“Yep. Get fucked, idiot.”

“Why are you being so normal about this?!”

“Because you’re gay.”

Caleb stared off into space, scrambling for words. What the fuck was even happening?

“I… what?”

“Shut up and let me grab you.”

“What- AUGH-“

Casey suddenly swooped down with a claw hand and scooped Caleb off the ground, fingers the size of tree logs wrapping around them and bringing them up slowly. They were tossed and turned in his grip, surrounded by warmth and centered in his palm as he brought them up to eye level. As they tried to sit up, they were met with his massive, unfettered gaze.

“Shortyyyyyy.”

“Why-Why… just why? Why do any of this?”

The giant smirked. “What, you don’t like it?” he asked, using a free index finger to mess with them, prodding them slightly here and there. Caleb looked both interested and exasperated.

“I like it, don’t get me wrong, I just-“

“Why question it then you gay bitch?” Casey quickly retorted, scratching their head with that same finger.

They sigh.

“Because my best friend suddenly both knows my address and is eighty feet tall at minimum. This defies all sense of logic and science.”

“And?”

“What do you MEAN, and?!”

“Why worry about that? Your friend is a giant, worry about that.”

“That’s exactly what I’m worrying about!”

“Then I dunno, fuckin’… don’t worry! We’re all chill here!”

“All of one of you?”

A comically-large finger pressed against Caleb’s mouth.

“Shut.”

“Sigh.”

“And- regardless, I mean look!”

Casey suddenly tightened his hand, to which Caleb found themselves enwrapped by hand, warmth surging through. The giant had held them in a vice grip, hand closing into a fist to seal away their bottom half. He held them close to his face.

“I can do this!” he said with a sting of vigor in his voice. “Why would I not do it?”

“This is very concerning.”

“Oh shush,” Casey reassured, still gripping Caleb like a stress toy. “This is cool. Admit it. Plus, I can carry you around, mess with you, let you skip like every line at the fair-“

“None of this even answers how you did it.”

Casey stared at them, lips drawing a blank.

“Uh… plot?”

Caleb reached out and smacked him across the face.

“Oh, shut it, you.”

[technowoah]

Can I request a prompt #37 with Karl Jacobs? I love your writing btw :)

Ring(s)

The four times Karl tried to propose and the one time he actually did.

- Karl Jacobs x gen!neutral reader!

- Prompts: 37) "Are you proposing?!"

⚠︎ swearing, fluff, angst if you squint and a rushed ending. I didn't proofread either

an// TYSM FOR LIKING MY WORK 😭ALSO Thanks for requesting and sorry this came out so late! Hope you enjoy :)

To say that Karl loved you was an understatement. He adored you and practically worshipped the ground you stood on. He is so respectful, which is a major upgrade from your other boyfriends, and loves you for who you are. You didn't have to put on a facadè at all during the 3 years you two have dated.

This love wasn't a one way thing. You loved him just as much, or even more, than he did. Everything he did you supported, you were always cheering him on from wherever you were. You were here for the good and the bad, and he was too. You two never shyed away from admiting your love and support. You could write a essay on each thing you love about Karl.

The idea of marriage came up during a late night dinner at Denny's. The idea came so naturally to you, so it surprised Karl that you didn't tense up. Karl was tense when bringing up the topic of marriage, so when you said "Yeah, I wanna get married to you one day." so casually it caught him off gaurd.

You two had already talked about marriage time and time again, but this time Karl wanted to take the initiative. He was ready to get married and since the marriage talk was just a few months ago it was fresh in his mind. Karl could vividly imagine you walking down the aisle towards him looking angelic. He could see everything now and he wanted those daydreams to become a reality. He wanted to physically feel your hands against his as you two say "I do" to one another.

He couldn't stop thinking about settling down in a nice house with you. Karl already bought a ring for you and always has it with him. Now he justs needs to figure out how to tell you.

1st proposal: Fireworks

"THIS IS THE MOST EXPENSIVE FIREWORK IN THE ENTIRE WORLD-"

You blocked out Jimmy's yelling as you sat in a lawn chair in the middle of the woods. Karl had invited you to a MrBeast video shoot because he thought it would be a great early 4th of July. It was late at night and slightly cool outside, so you were wearing a MrBeast hoodie Karl was wearing earlier. You zoned out as the boys talked to the camera over and over again, taking multiple shots.

You found yourself looking at Karl most of the time you sat there and you always caught his gaze towards you. Every time you caught him looking at you, you sent him a small wave or blow him a kiss and every time he sent a shy wave back or sent a more exaggerated kiss back.

During halfway through the shooting you begrudgingly had to move your lawn chair further and further away from your original spot. Karl always checked up on you before and after each firework set were blown up. He has been acting fidgety around you and you didnt know why. When you tried to confront him about it he would always turn away and go back to the boys without a glance back, and his hands in his pockets.

You loved watching the guys play with so many different types of fireworks, this was a great 4th of July for you, but you wished that Karl was sitting next to you feeling the bliss that you were.

You were currently sitting behind bulletproof glass while the guys had a control panel on their lap. Karl kept sending glances towards you and you looked at him and smiled whishing he was next to you and not over by the guys. You knew it was selfish, but he invited you here.

Karl kept bouncing his leg, he kept his hand in his pocket which held the ring. He kept sending glances towards you, knowing he should be on one knee right about now. Jimmy was about to fire off the last rocket of the night and Karl couldn't seem to go over and ask you to marry him. He knew he was hilding himself back which made him hate himself. You deserved a good night and he hoped you enjoyed the fireworks, but he knew on the ride back he would have to apologize.

He stayed with the boys as they went to go see the fireworks they would be setting off soon. Once they came back they were all about to press the button to set off the expensive fireworks they counted down from 5 and he looked towards you. You were standing up with your arms crossed, hopefully shielding yourself from the cold, and looking towards the fireworks that were going to burst. They finally pressed the button the fireworks went off.

Each burst of light in the air sent a glow onto your smiling face. Karl sent a somber glace and marveled in how the explosion of the fireworks sent a beautiful glow around you.

This wasnt the right time. Next time.

2nd proposal: Donuts

"Im sorry for last night." Karl apologized as you both took a seat at a booth by the window at the small coffee and donut shop.

This was supposed to be an apology for the last failed proposal. Instead of spending time with you, he kept his distance which was the opposite of what he really wanted to do. This was a way to spend much needed time with eachother, but this was also another attempt at a proposal.

Karl wanted to hide the ring in the middle of a donut so when you inevitably look at it when he hands it to you, you'll see the ring and then he'll propose right there. To him it seemed flawless.

You never wanted a huge proposal. You didnt want that much attention on you when your future significant other would propose. Something simple would be the ideal proposal and you've hinted that many times to Karl and right now he was listening. There were only two other couples in the small diner because others were picking up donuts and leaving. If he decided to get down on one knee it would cause a scene.

You stayed silent for a moment looking at Karl before deciding to speak.

"It's no problem. Please dont stress out about it." You smiled softly and he smiled back at you. "I mean the fireworks were beautiful, but you all were screaming too much."

You both laughed as you both recalled that night in the desert.

"Yeah I just didn't..I didn't really talk to you all night. I feel bad." Karl said fiddling with his hands.

"Its in the past Karl. And I still know you love me." You reached out to grab both of his hands and hold his cool hands in yours.

"I do love you." He whispered for only you to hear leaving both of you smiling ear to ear.

"What kind of donuts you want?" Karl asked looking into your eyes carefully.

You thought about it for a while before speaking up. "I'll keep it simple. Icing with sprinkles. Surprise me with the icing color!" You exclaimed while letting go of his hands for a second.

Once you two let go of eachothers hands he immediately went to his pocket and played with the velvet box. He nodded his head and without a word he stood up to meet the cashier behind the display box of donuts. He ordered only one donut as you said with orange icing this time.

He paid for the food and stayed at the counter where he paid. Karl looked back to see if you were paying attention to him only to see you looking out the window at the people passing by. Karl smiled at the sight knowing he really wants to marry you one day and then he looked down at the glistening ring inside of the box.

Karl was supposed to put the ring in the middle of the donut that was laying alone on a napkin on the counter. He started to think of the possibilities of what could happen. What if you didn't see the ring and crumble the ring with the napkin and throw it away? What if you accidentally put the ring in your mouth? What if you weren't hungry anymore?

He looked over again to where you were looking at him giving him the same smile you gave during the fireworks. Karl sighed and once again closed the box with the ring. He was a coward and he knew that.

Karl picked up the donut from the counter and made his way over to you.

"Here's your donut with sprinkles and orange icing!" Karl exclaimed putting emphasis on the 'orange' part.

"Thanks babe!" You smiled as he sat down across from you. "Wait, you didn't get anything for yourself?"

Karl sighed again for what seemed like the 100th time today and put on a smile. "I ended up not being as hungry as I thought I was."

"Well I could always share!" You started to eat your donut as Karl ended up looking outside.

Unbeknownst to you he was thinking of another way to propose without himself getting in his own head.

He'll find a time.

3rd proposal: Livestream

"Chat! As you can see I have my significant other here with me!" Karl exclaimed to his Twitch following.

You were sat next to him in another one of his office chairs with a blanket across your lap. You loved to join Karl's streams, the last couple of time you two played minecraft, gang beats, played on the nitendo switch for a while, but this time he didn't tell you what games you two would be playing. Karl just told you to come over tonight and ended up asking to join him for a stream last minute.

Now you are here next to him as Karl glows with excitement as he streams to his growing followers. You loved how he interacted with his fans and had a genuine connection with them, but sometimes that strong connection can, and has led to some nights where you had to stay the night and comfort him from his inner demons and the internet. Those nights made you love him even more, the vulnerability he gave to you made you comfortable with him.

It seems like the more time you spend eith him the more you want to officially get married. You didn't want to rush him because you soon figured out for yourself that there is no rush to express your love, which you two do everyday day. You two can get eloped in Vegas and you'll be happy, as long as you can spend the rest of your life with the man you love.

Karl kept sending glances towards you throughout the stream hoping you were having fun with the chill, q and a stream. Again he wanted to propose to you tonight during the stream. He loved showing your relationship whenever he could and whenever you would allow him to. His community also loved you the moment you became his significant other, so hopefully this will be a beautiful moment.

You talked to his chat as he contemplated, again, about whether to propose tonight. It wasn't infront of people, it was infront of a screen and it would be on Twitter in less than a week. This would be a good moment, but then again he wanted this moment to be between you two and he couldn't find the right time nor the right "moment".

As the stream continues you ended up wrapping yourself fully in the blanket and lying your head on his shoulder. You both cuddled eachother while you two answered questions. Karl kissed the top of your head and finally collected all of his thoughts.

He didn't need to propose to officially claim his love to you. Karl knew you both loved eachother to the ends of the Earth and back. There's no need for ceremony and the one day he will propose, he know it will come naturally. There is no need to force it, and now he wont.

Only time will tell.

4th proposal: spongebob

"Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

I can't hear you!

Aye, aye, captain!

Oh!"

The TV illuminated the comfortable, dark room you two were in. You were lying on the couch with Karl with the blanket you had while streaming. It was late at night after the stream and you two ended up watching re-runs of spongebob. Karl sang along to the theme song softly while you hummed along. This was the 4th episode you both watched this night and it was a great way to end the week.

"Do you want to stay over tonight?" Karl asked softly with tiredness in his voice.

"Of couse. Im too tired to move, so thanks for offering." You chuckled.

"You're welcome here anytime." Karl yawned and squeezed your sides. "Do you want popcorn?"

"Hell yeah." You got off of Karl as he walked to the kitchen.

He put the bag into the microwave and leaned back onto the kitchen counter as he waited. Karl looked over to the side and saw a empty vase which was next to the velvet box he was carrying with him this whole week. He shook his head and laughed to himself before getting the popcorn out of the microwave, dumping it in a bowl and walking back to see you taking up the whole couch.

"Move over or I'll sit on you." Karl said standing above her.

"Is that a promise?" You teased.

"Okay then!" He turned around and began to slowly and dramatically fake sitting ontop of you.

You began to laugh and try to push him off of you. You successfully got him to sit down and returned to your previous position, but this time with popcorn.

"I love you, you know that?" You hummed into his chest.

"Yeah, and I love you more."

"I love you most."

"I love you mostest." Karl laughed.

"That's not a word." You smiled.

"I love you so much I made up a word for ya." Karl kissed you head and you hugged him tighter.

"You know what?" Karl chuckled. "I love you so much that I tried to propose to you 3 times this week."

Karl finished and you sat up from your spot looking surprised. Karl sat up as well thinking he made a mistake telling you. He was abkut to apologize, but you beat him to speak.

"Oh my gosh!" You exhaled.

"Look, I'm sorr-"

"Are you proposing?!" You exclaimed with a smile on your face.

"Huh-?"

Karl was surprised just like you were before. He remembered that he wanted the Maybe this was the moment he needed this week.

Karl grabbed both of your hands and caressed them both, looking into your eyes. "I was planning to all week. But now I think this is a good moment. So Y/N? Will you marry me?"

"Of course I will!" You enveloped him into a tight hug and peppered his face with kisses. He finally found his moment and he couldn't be happier.

"You said you tried to propose three other times?" You questioned. "When was that?"

"Its a long story."

[ptergwen]

no sleep

pairing: singer!reader x tom holland || w/c: 1.6k

warnings: swearing and many many many suggestive jokes

summary: you’re on jimmy kimmel to talk about your music, but he has other plans

a/n: y’all i’ve literally always wanted to write singer!reader and this idea just came to me and i had to get it out because it’s so cute :,) i really hope ya like it

-

jimmy kimmel invited you onto his show to promote a single from your upcoming album. you stepped out of the spotlight for a while, so this is your first official appearance of the year.

“my first guest tonight...” there’s a cheer from the audience. you grin to yourself, waiting for jimmy to finish announcing you.

“you wanna say it for me?” he chuckles and stands your picture up on his desk. “my first guest tonight surprised fans this morning with her new single ‘no sleep.’ it’s currently number one in over seventy countries.” jimmy holds for applause, which you get a ton of. you cover your hot face with your hands.

“she’s here to talk to us about the song and her short hiatus. please welcome y/n y/l/n!”

the music plays while you walk onstage, followed by more cheers and clapping. you’re beaming as you wave to everyone. you give jimmy a quick hug and exchange hello’s over the noise.

you’ve been in the industry for a few years, but you’ll never get used to responses like this. all the love really warms your heart.

“thank you!” you giggle out, taking your seat on the couch. the audience yells some more when the music dies out. “thank you so much! oh my god,” you make a face at jimmy, who laughs and gestures to everyone. “they clearly hated the song,” he jokes to you. “i was gonna say,” you agree, smoothing your dress down.

you look out at the crowd with a pout. “no, seriously. you guys are so cute.” jimmy copies your pout, earning a playful eye roll from you.

you’ve been on the show a couple of times before, so you two are friendly. tom has also brought you to chill backstage with him when he was a guest. you would’ve brought him this time if he wasn’t away for filming.

“so, you took most of the year off from making music,” jimmy starts the actual conversation. “mhm, i did,” you hum and cross one of your legs over the other. “how was that? was it weird not being in the studio?” you scrunch your face up, then he adds another question. “what did you actually do with yourself?”

“i mean, music is obviously a big part of who i am. making it, loving it, all that stuff.” a small smile crosses your face. “so, yeah. it sort of felt like something was missing at first.” jimmy nods along, you shrugging one of your shoulders.

“at the same time, i really needed to take a minute and just breathe. come back with my shit more together. i think i have,” you let out a reflective sigh. “it didn’t have anything to do with your boyfriend? a mr. tom holland?” jimmy teases, you waving a hand at him. “no, don’t give him all the credit.”

your break genuinely was for yourself. no one needs to know that tom was also off, or that he spent all his free time with you. that was just a plus.

“are you sure? because, it seemed like you two were getting really cozy.” a picture from your instagram pops up on the screen. it’s of tom under a blanket. he’s reaching out for you with a lazy smile. you lean over on the couch so you’re off camera, another giggle escaping you.

jimmy flips to another picture. “that was exhibit A. here’s exhibit B.” the whole audience coos, jimmy raising his eyebrows at you. this one is a mirror selfie from tom’s instagram. your arms are slung around his neck from behind, and half your face is hidden. tom is doing his signature eye crinkling smile into the camera.

“aren’t they just adorable?” jimmy asks the audience, making them erupt in more cheers. you sit up again and clear your throat. seeing those is bittersweet for you. “he’s very cuddly. anyway, back to the music!” you do a small clap. little do you know, there’s much more to come.

“yes, yes. back to the music. talk to me about ‘no sleep.’” the song is one hundred percent about tom. you’re not sure you should say that, considering the... explicit content in it. you and tom did get very cozy over your break, as jimmy would say. it was the only time you weren’t relaxing.

“well,” you plaster on an overly happy smile. that earns more laughter from jimmy. “it’s about what you do in bed when you’re, um, not sleeping,” you explain. “and who do you do those things in bed with?” jimmy glances up at the screen again. “you’re choosing violence today, jimmy,” you say under your breath.

there’s a chuckle from backstage that sounds eerily similar to tom’s. it must have been a PA. all this talk about him is seriously fucking with your head.

“well, everyone in my life inspires my work in some way. they’re such angels,” you dodge the question, thinking you’re clever about it. jimmy won’t let you get off that easy. “friends? family?” he asks you. “yeah, everyone,” you exhale in relief. jimmy widens his eyes at you. “so, that means ‘no sleep’ is about your mom?”

your mouth falls open. he’s really going to make you spill the details of your sex life.

“what the fuck, no!” you squeal, looking out into the audience for help. they join in your laughter. “it’s about tom,” you finally confirm so jimmy doesn’t suggest anything else. “it’s about tom, my god. next topic.” you’re smiling despite yourself.

“why? don’t you wanna tell us more about your lover?” jimmy glances off to the side. what is going on back there? you sit up straighter in your spot. “no, this is my interview!” you’re half joking, half serious.

although you and tom aren’t private at all, you’ve never talked about him this much. it’s overwhelming. besides that, this is making you miss him a lot.

“that’s too bad. we thought... we thought you might like to share it,” jimmy is already grinning about whatever he has planned. this isn’t supposed to be part of your segment. “huh? i’m literally so lost.” you furrow your eyebrows at him, lowering your voice. “we didn’t talk about this.”

he pats the arm of your couch. “they say there’s no time like the present. ladies and gentlemen, tom holland!”

on cue, tom runs out from backstage. the audience practically roars with how loud they are. people even jump out of their seats. you clasp a hand over your mouth in pure shock. this feels like a prank, like jimmy is about to say sike. then, tom comes up to the couch. you almost fall over, jimmy proudly watching on.

tom grins so wide it takes up his whole face. “happy release day,” he murmurs as you get to your feet. you’re not able to speak just yet, only staring up at him with glossy eyes. he brings you into a tight hug. his hands rub up and down your back, your arms snaking around his middle.

“tommy,” you try to whisper the nickname. you forgot your microphone is on. everyone “aw’s” at you both, including jimmy. “my love,” tom’s lips brush your cheek briefly. “hi, baby,” he speaks into your ear. you hide your face in his button up while he rocks you side to side.

he’s been away for a couple of months working on the third spider-man. this is the first time you’ve seen him since he left.

“shouldn’t you be in atlanta?” you ask louder this time for the audience to hear. you’re still doing an interview. “today’s a big day. i had to see you,” tom gives you one last squeeze. “in person,” he adds, before you can say you already facetimed.

the fact that him and jimmy put this whole thing together is making you emotional. you’d be fully crying if you two were alone right now.

“she doesn’t want you here, though. remember?” jimmy chimes in, tom breathing out a laugh. he sadly lets go of you. you flop back onto the couch, tom pointing behind him with his thumb. “i’ll just be on my way. five hour flight, no big deal.” “no, no, no, no. stay,” you whine and make grabby hands at him.

that’s all it takes for tom to slip into the spot next to you. he bites back a smile, putting an arm around you and the couch. you don’t want to annoy everyone with too much pda, so you subtly curl into his side. the people actually love you and tom together. jimmy claps his hands.

“we’ll be right back with y/n y/l/n and tom holland!” he says into the camera, the band playing more filler music. he steps out from behind the desk to greet tom. tom stands up, the two of them giving each other pats on the back. the camera stops rolling.

“hey, man. thanks for doing this,” tom puts a hand on jimmy’s arm. “anything for the happy couple. i’m gonna get some water, see you in five.” jimmy shoots you another smile on his way to his dressing room. you return it. that leaves you and tom to yourselves.

“baby,” you say in a sing song voice, dropping your head onto tom’s shoulder. “i’m so happy you’re here. i real life almost peed when you came out.” tom snakes his arm around your waist. “that would be upsetting,” he mumbles, his index finger drawing circles on you. “it would’ve ruined your very pretty dress.”

“you like it?” you knowingly tug at the form fitting material. tom shifts in his spot. “i’ll tell you what,” he leans in closer to you with a smirk, his breath tickling your ear. “we’re getting no sleep tonight,” he sings from the chorus of your song. you burst into a giggle and squeeze your eyes shut.

he ends up being right.

[arty-shadow-morningstar]

Graveyard Siblings (3)

Some for revenge and some sibling bonding.

[Masterlist]

(Part 1)(Part 2)

-------

Adrien was next to be visited. Plagg woke him up from his sleep.

-------

“Kit, wake up. I want camembert.”

“Plagg, silence. You are not getting any cheese if you do that.”

“Sorry, Adrien but you are not my ‘master’ anymore.”

“Plagg? Why are you here? Where’s the ring?”

“The ring is as far away as possible and kept safely away. I am here because someone wants to talk to you.”

“Who?”

A cloaked, hooded figure stepped out of the shadows to his room.

“Kitty. My Chaton. Did you miss me?” A sweet, familiar but yet so terrifying voice came from the figure.

She pulled down the hood to reveal Ladybug with a wicked-looking black mask with white lenses.

“What am I talking about? You do miss me. Your Bugaboo. Too bad I don’t feel the same, Adrien.”

Lightning flashed and it started to rain. The mask was gone, revealing his dead classmate, Marinette with chilling red eyes. The pigtails grew longer and curved upwards, giving the illusion of her having horns. Twin blades flashed and she leaped towards him. (Damian gave them to her with some lessons in exchange for spending time with, babysitting, the kwamis.)

Adrien scrambled away from the bed in the nick of time. A sword impaling the spot where he just was.

“Plagg, help. Where is the ring? I need to transform.”

“Sorry, kitten. I am not telling you. Even if you did have the ring, it’s not going to be much help.”

“Kitty, stay still. Then, we can be together. Just like you wanted.”

Adrien continued to dodge.

“What do you mean?” He all but screamed at Plagg.

“Pigtails, here, is a vengeful spirit. She’s not going to stop until she is satisfied. How about asking her what she wants?”

“Ladybug, what do you want?”

“What I wanted was a partner I could rely on, someone I can trust with my life, someone who wouldn’t stab me in the back for his own selfish gain. I wanted a friend who would have my back and not tell me to keep quiet at the price of my mental health and my relationships with people I care about. WAS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!”

She managed to get a cut on his left cheek.

Soon, he was on the ground, bleeding out on the round.

“Tell Hawkmoth that he better watch out. Because-” lightning struck and Plagg and Ladybug had disappeared, “his downfall is coming.” Her voice echoed through his room.

Adrien laid bleeding until Natalie opened the door after hearing a crash from the room and came to check on him. As she called an ambulance for Adrien, she wondered if it wasn’t too late to ask for redemption and be spared from Ladybug’s wrath for her part in her murder.

Adrien had the word ‘TRAITOR’ carved into his back. Forever reminding him of his crimes.

--------

He wasn’t in school for a week after the incident. They all were told that Adrien had an accident while fencing.

Gabriel was a little panicking now.

He hired an exorcist, (John Constantine got a hefty amount and did a few flashy magic tricks to appease Gabriel but he didn’t lift the curse Maria put on the place. She is not someone to be on the bad side of and he thinks that he can’t lift it even if he wanted to.)

Emilie gets a little sus at Gabriel when he brought this strange man with a British accent into their home after their son got attacked in his own room with security tighter than Fort Knox.

She doesn’t buy that ‘accident’ bullshit that her husband, son and even Natalie tries to sell her. She thinks it is connected to what happened while she was in a coma.

-----

Adrien has a curse too.

(Credit to @raeuberprinzessin for giving me an idea)

He couldn’t act like the ‘Perfect Adrien’ in public anymore. Acting more like Chat Noir at first then, later a spoiled brat. His friends thought that he was finally rebelling against his father and encouraged it a lot.

Adrien started criticizing other people, strangers at first then to the people working on the photoshoots to his fans to his other school mates, people in his class and his friends. (The curse planted ideas into his head about what he should say and he said them all without thinking about the effect it has on other people)

People started avoiding him not liking his attitude and his comments about how they should behave and change something about them because he doesn’t like it that way and guilt-tripping them when he doesn’t get his way. Even Nino started to distance himself after he saw how Adrien talked to a fan.

The public thought it was a phase but as he got progressively worse, people started despising him. Adrien doesn’t realize this of course so far, happy that his father let him get away with ‘ruining the Agreste image.’ (Gabriel was worried about a potential vengeful ghost and making sure his wife didn't know about his stint as a supervillain. There was also the fact that the Afterlife made more sales than him again and managed to get on the cover of Vogue when he should have, dammit.) He was finally able to say what he wanted to without repercussions. Until he realized when Nino and everyone else cancelled for a hangout for the third time that week that he was slowly losing his friends.

He panics and tries to fix the situation. He didn’t want to be alone again.

He talks to Nino about it and to his horror, he couldn’t stop himself from saying many things that were a little hurtful. (Second part. The moment he realizes he is going to be alone. He is going to find out that yes, lies can hurt people. He is going to see it happen firsthand.)

Nino moved seats and told Adrien that their friendship was on hold until he apologized.

Soon, nearly every time his mouth opened, lies and insults about his friends or their embarrassing secrets came spilling out. Everyone hated him now and Mme. Bustier tried to give him a reprimand about his behaviour, which when he tried to defend himself, he found himself unable to speak.

He managed to explain to his father what caused his unpopularity by writing what happened to him. Unfortunately due to his poor behaviour before the second part of the curse was activated, his fan base was dwindling and people didn’t like him anymore so there was a hit on the Gabriel brand.

He no longer has to do modeling, clearing his schedule. But no one would spend time with him.

The best solution he could do with his predicament was to keep quiet and endure the loneliness and the glares of his classmates at school. Adrien was relegated to the back and nearly everyone avoided him. He was now a social pariah.

Even Lila avoided him because of her own curse which made Adrien turn into one of her previous victims. (She also didn’t ponder why Marinette rarely appears compared to the others.)

If Adrien felt a tiny bit remorseful or guilty for making Marinette keep quiet or betraying Ladybug, he can gain a little control over what he says.

The curse can be broken if he apologizes to Maria herself or to her grave.

------

The first few months, while Marinette adapted to living with the Waynes, Jason stayed over at Wayne Manor because having Maria living with him at his apartment wasn’t a good idea and he had no clue how to take care of a teenage girl.

On paper she is adopted by Bruce because Jason can’t. (Some CPS reasons.)

Making Jason a little more salty towards Bruce. “I found her first. I called dibs.”

Brought Maria to meet the other Outlaws and they adopted her too. “Hey, guys. She’s my sister first.”

Jason was the one to teach her how to shoot a gun because he was ‘the most capable’ of teaching her.

The first few months were a little tense with Marinette not fully trusting them and the same with the rest of the Batfam.

Jason warmed her up a bit to him by telling a little of why he took her here.

He was also the one to book them flight to Paris with Bruce’s credit card so she can tell her friends that she wasn’t dead in person.

They bonded more after stopping some nefarious plot in Paris while they were there. Let’s say Gentleman Ghost and something involving the catacombs in Paris. (I watched some Batman: Brave and the Bold for childhood nostalgia.)

Kwamis were animal-shaped and they were interesting creatures to be around. And very very curious.

There was a stressful day for Maria when all the Kwamis decided to play hide and seek. Damian somehow got roped into helping her as the only available person in the Manor and he will deny that he enjoyed it.

Damian is the little brother she always wanted and she is more tolerable compared to his brothers. There is also the fact that she trusts him with the kwamis and deep down, he feels super-honoured. (I just love older sister!Mari)

Tim and her being insomniac/coffee buddies. There has been many many interventions to stop this.

I get that Marinette is this selfless person and loves making people happy but she has siblings now and them eating the stuff she made for herself to enjoy, should get on her nerves after a while.

She makes a box with booby-traps in which she puts in her cookies and food.

There are many different layers of traps because this is the Batfam and each of them is non-lethal and more ridiculous.

Okay, I once read a fic about Marinette making a bear-trap style box to hide the Miracle Box so this box is also like that but kept for food. (Traps and Sneaks by quicksilversquared)

Someone (I vote a hungry Dick or Jason, maybe a suspicious Bruce) made a mistake of putting their hand into the box and the first trap activated.

Screams filled the house.

Everyone came down including Marinette.

Bruce asked, “Who did this?”

“It was me.”

“Why?”

“They kept eating the cookies.”

“There are other ways to stop them from doing that you know like a ‘Do Not Touch’ sign not a death trap box.”

“They are non-lethal.”

Bruce locked it away but Tim later stole it to tweak it and store his coffee. ------ (Part 4)

[ivyglow]

Mine | Anthony Beauvillier

A/n: this idea came after we had a very sexy- I mean- Angry* Anthony pushing Sidney Crosby. Barbie and some anons send the good energy and so althought it took me forever here it is *cheers*. A huge thank you for @barbienoturbby​ for sending me some specific ideas (sharpies, choking etc hehehe), putting up w my random messages in the middle of the night or being a insecure bitch, ILY BARBIE! Huge shout out to @sebs-aston​ for proofreading this so fast *you’re amazing, liv!*.  PS. More than ever I’m gonna need your feedback because I’m an insecure bitch and this is my first time writing smut (freddie was thigh riding, I don’t consider it too much). So please just lmk if you like it or hate it <3 

Word count: 4k

Warnings: smut, mention of chocke, spitting, oral -female receiving- and all those dirty stuff. 

Summary: after getting angry on the ice, you decide to make Anthony angry in bed too. 

You knew Tito was a dom in bed as soon as you met him: he helped you to sit and to get up on your first date, and he led you to your car with his hand on your lower back. One month into getting to know each other, you were planning a gathering with his friends and he was the one to assign everyone with a task. Some days he would use fewer words and stick with hand gestures or eye contact to tell you what he wanted or what he was silently saying. 

So when you two had sex for the first time and he was on top, you were not surprised, you also weren’t surprised when he asked how would you feel about hair pulling, choking, and tying. And, well, you’d never tried any of this, so you were honest with him, knowing that honesty was the key to make things work. He promised to go slow, and he watched you intently while he did everything just to make sure you were comfortable. You can still remember how it felt when he first stretched you, how your heel went to his back to accommodate his waist better, how this movement gave him the perfect angle to go all the way until the end. 

You also remember the hickeys he left on your skin, mostly on places where your clothes could hide, but some you knew he purposely made for people to see. And people saw, indeed and also heard. He got a noise complaint twice because his old bed would scratch and bang on the wall, and that wouldn’t be a huge problem if it was anyone else, but it was Anthony, a hockey player, at that point -your boyfriend-, and he had the stamina to go for hours. A chug of water, maybe a fruit snack, and less than twenty minutes later he was ready to go again - or he would use these twenty minutes to get you off with his mouth and fingers. So the noise complaint was very much expected. 

Now six months into the relationship, this wasn’t a problem anymore. Tito bought a new bed, and even talked with a friend about the possibility of getting soundproof walls. That’s why you were drinking your water and eating one of his energy bars while watching the game. The dynamic after games was usually very sexual, it didn’t matter if he was on the road or at home, you would find a way to get off, either phone sex or spicy pics. He never left you to your own hands. 

The Isles were playing against the Penguins and you knew he was pissed off because of their losing streak against that team. That made him angry with some specifics players too. When he got home last night, you just cuddled together and went to sleep, he was tired and fuming because of their loss, and he probably heard a handful by his coach. Because of those losses, you knew he was going to skate his way around the ice tonight more than ever, and, especially, that he was angry. 

You were laying on his couch when the game started, the Isles skating around the ice in a way you would have bet was a premonition for another loss, but ten minutes in things started to go differently, and that was the exact moment when you sat and gripped Beau’s shirt before an amazing shot hit the Pens’ net. They kept the rhythm on for the next two periods, although they were pretty much stressful- a handful of times you caught yourself holding your breath or cursing. The last two were also a stage for your boyfriend’s anger. He was pissed in a way you’d never seen before on the ice, and when Sidney Crosby pushed Pulock, Tito had had enough and shoved the opposition’s player on the ice. Torn between finding it hot or funny, you chose the latter letting out a loud laugh. Yet, when another exchange of pushes happened between the Pens’ superstar and Beau you sure felt the heat taking up space inside your body and you shifted on the couch. There was another goal and the game kept on providing stress and anxiety for the fans, but you were stuck on the scene your boyfriend had just put up. 

He was usually like this in bed, but not that much on the ice, and seeing that happening outside the four walls left you with a lingering warmth inside your body, and not the cute warmth you usually felt when he cooked for you or told you how much he loved you. But the warmth you got whenever he bent you on the kitchen counter or held your hand tight while going down on you. 

It was past midnight when you heard the door open and close, the soft click making your heart beat faster. He was home. You heard the thud of his bag on the floor and his steps bringing his scent closer to the living room where you were sitting on the couch wearing only his jersey and his favorite lace.

“Hey you, winner,” your voice echoed in the dimly lit apartment and you could see his lips curling in a small smile.

“Hey, babe,” his lips found yours on a quick peck and you looked up for more contact, but Anthony was already walking to the kitchen. 

“Are you ok?” you asked, barefoot padding the floor until you reached the stool.

Your boyfriend was already busy cutting some bananas in a bowl, “Yeah, just a little stressed with the game and hungry,” he answered.

“But you won,” you stated in confusion. 

His eyes scanned you for a second before going back to his task. The silence was everything you needed to know: he really was not in the mood for long talks after the episode, but you were a woman on a mission and you knew exactly what to do to get Anthony riddled up. 

“You guys had a great game…” you began, cautious with your words and actions, hands reaching for a banana on the fruit bowl. “How was playing against Sidney Crosby?”

You saw how his eyebrows raised slightly before pouring honey on his bowl and whipping his fingers with his tongue. You knew the action wasn’t supposed to be filthy, yet you’ve been dating him long enough to know that he knew every action of his could be seen as sexual at some point. 

“It was normal, he’s a normal hockey player like any of us,” his tone is nonchalant. 

You suppress a grin, “he’s not like any of you, he’s Sidney Crosby. Just last night he reached his thousandth game,” Tito’s now chewing on his fruit and you can see how the motion seems tighter after your words, still you keep going, “he’s like a superstar! I would love to meet him any of these days…” you trail off busying yourself on biting the banana you just peeled off. His eyes trained on how your lips wrap around the piece of fruit, your tongue purposely darting out. Your boyfriend chooses silence again and you huff rolling your eyes. 

“Did you just roll your eyes at me?” he queries, eyes on his bowl, jaw still clenched tight while biting another piece of his fruit. You dart your eyes in another direction while biting your banana again, this time without so much care on giving him a hard time. “I asked you a question, y/n,” his tone was sharp and his voice low. You shake your head. 

He grabs his water bottle before chugging half of the content, “Cat got your tongue? I swear I just saw you poking it out while eating that banana to provoke me,” he tauntingly  gives you a defiant look. 

Anthony motions for you to come to him and you follow his orders willingly, eager to finally have your way with him. You’re within arm’s reach when he tugs you closer, making you stumble in the middle of his big thighs. In a blink of an eye, you feel the sting on your butt cheeks, his big hands finding it again one more time before grabbing your chin. “You can’t even wait for your man to eat,” it’s a low grunt and he seems more annoyed with your playful smile, and you see the perfect opportunity to tease him a little bit more, “You could eat something else, there’s nothing stopping you…” 

With that Anthony seems to lose his judgment before swinging your body on top of the counter, “you’re being such a brat tonight” his hands grab your butt squeezing it hard, “that’s not how you get the things you want” 

“No? Then why are you about to fuck me?” you mock him knowing damn right that this would only make him go harder on you. 

“Crisse,” (holy shit) his French accent makes your pussy throb. You loved when he talked in French to you.

His big hand pushes you back in a swift motion, the same hand spreads your legs for him, and it’s only a second before you’re fully laying on the counter. Still wearing only a lace thong and his jersey, you know the former is about to be ripped out of you. Anthony drags his fingers from the bottom of your belly to your breasts before gifting you a devilish smirk as soon as he notices you’re not wearing a bra. 

“You think Sidney Crosby is the superstar, but you know damn well I’m gonna be the reason why you’re seeing stars tonight,” he whispers before sitting on the stool and kissing up to your thighs. His lips are sticky from the honey and because they’re cold it sends chills running through your warm body. You stretch your arms to reach his hair and he hums grabbing your wrists harshly, “no hair pulling for you tonight,” his murmurs hit your skin and you let out a small whine. 

In order to play with your sensations, you see him taking a long gulp of his cold water. You know it will make his mouth colder and slicker, and you know he’s only doing it because he’s planning to spend a long time between your legs.

And that he does.

You sigh when his lips finally reach your pussy, the shock it causes is good and you can’t help but close your thighs in an attempt to bring him where you are really yearning for his lips. Nevertheless, that’s not what he has planned for you, and he drags his mouth between your pussy lips long before finally wrapping his lips on your clit and humming in pleasure. 

“Oh fuck,” you let out a whine when his fingers reach for your nipple and twist it hard. His wet tongue flickered on your clit and he dived in deeper, making you feel all of him, from his stubble that was starting to grow to his full lips, you could feel it all.

“Anthony,” you try to form a sentence in the exact moment he pushs one finger inside of you, but your voice comes out as a prayer. A plea for more. 

You were a sinner for him.

“You taste so good,” it’s a pleasure mumble and it comes just before his palm strikes your butt cheeks in a firm slap. “I could spend days here, bébé” 

“Anthony,” you try again and this time he laughs with his lips still wrapped around your clit. The vibrations send shivers through your whole body, your toes curl and you try to reach for his hair again before his hand holds both of your wrists. 

You’re close and he knows it because he adds another finger and curls it. It’s a ‘come here’ motion and from another dimension, you were almost able to hear him whisper the same words in French. 

“Give it to me,” he demands, and you do as said just as another finger hits your right spot. For some seconds the kitchen’s ceiling turns black with dots and your vision goes blurry. Toes curling, the pitch on your belly button finally making its way out just like the curses and moans that leave your mouth. Most of them being his name and how good he makes you feel. 

You’re not even done with your high when his big hands grab your ankles bringing your body to the edge of the counter and making you sit. “Open your mouth,” he demands. 

You moan, eyes rolling back from pleasure, “put your tongue out for me, má chérie,” his hands, now holding your jaw, tighten around you. There’s a whimper of bliss and you part your lips wide bringing your tongue out just like demanded before he spits on your mouth. 

“See how good you taste?!” Anthony hums and you swallow it before poking your tongue out again and licking from his glistering chin to his lips. The action fuels a passionate kiss and it’s seconds before your weak legs wrap themselves around his waist bringing him closer. Your core finds the bulge on his pants and you whimper feeling aroused again. 

Your boyfriend is fast to grasp the underside of your thighs bringing your body close to his before making his way towards the bedroom. You take your time licking and kissing his neck and jaw until your body hits the mattress and he’s unbuckling his belt.

“Take it off” he commands, unbuttoning his dress shirt. You’re fast to obey taking off the jersey you’re wearing, now you’re fully naked in front of him. 

“Hands,” you put both of your wrists together and he fastens his belt around it tight. 

From the way his eyebrows were slightly up to his lips parted, you knew he was about to give you another orgasm, you knew that he wasn’t done and he wouldn’t be any time soon. 

“Do we have a safe word tonight, bébé?” his full lips find your jaw and neck and he nibbles on your ear before sucking harshly on your neck again. 

His purpose is to mark you, not only where people can see, but also where they can’t. Just like your waist is being held with such fierceness, you know it’ll leave prints there. You hum a yes dropping your head to the side so he can have more access to your skin, “use your words, you know I need to hear you say it,” he whispers now bringing his mouth to your nipples and biting it lightly. You whimper, “our safe word is blue.” 

“Perfect,” you can feel his smile on your skin and when you reach for his hair with your hands tied, he pushes them up. His strong arm swings on top of your belly and he takes his time on your breasts before making his way lower. There’s a pitch bubbling on your belly again just with the idea of it and he gives you mischievous grim kissing and licking your thighs. 

“Beau,” you whine already feeling your legs weakening again.

“I told you I was hungry, you were the one who suggested the meal,” the funny remark is accompanied by a flicker of his tongue on your cunt. “Now I’ll only stop when I’m satisfied.” 

You curse closing your hands and trying to bring your waist up. He shakes his head, “huh huh, that’s a bad girl attitude,” he spits on your pussy and you moan loud, “and you know exactly what we do to bad girls in this house, don’t you?” 

You nod and he chuckles.

“Words.” 

“I know, sir.” 

“Now, there’s my good girl,” he praises finding your clit and holding it carefully between his teeth, “now give it to me just like you suggested,” he murmurs before diving on your pussy, his tongue gentle and slow, in contrast with his solid arm pinning you to the bed and his rough behavior. 

It would be a long ride and you would feel every step taken, because each one would bring you closer to the inevitable. You felt urgency though; you wanted him to fuck your brains out already. But Anthony took his time, and you knew he was being good because he let you cum in the kitchen even after you provoked him. When his point finger entered you, your eyes couldn’t focus and you knew you were closer, yet instead of giving you a release, your boyfriend took his kisses to your thighs grinning at you one more time. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he speaks under his breath, eyes trained on your pussy. Yet you don’t feel ashamed, because it’s Anthony, and he knows you like the back of his hands, he knows what to do to make you comfortable and he knows how to make you feel good. He would praise and love your body rightly, so you let him. You spread your legs wider and gave him a lopsided smile. 

“Please,” you plead again that night; however, he follows your request this time. 

Anthony dives in again, licking and spitting, flickering his tongue and using his fingers. Giving you what he got and what he knows you like. Your body is fast to answer, your waist trying to go higher to find his mouth, your toes curling, your head shooting back and your eyes rolling. 

He got you there. Fast.

And he made sure to ride you out of you high, this tongue not the least careful with your sensitive bud, while cleaning you up he kept licking it lightly. Full lips brushing it with dedication. 

“Now I want you on all fours,” there’s a dirty smile on his glistering lips and you hold back another moan with the image of Anthony sitting between your legs, face glowing with your cum, “allos y,” (c’mon). You turn your body, holding your hands before supporting your head on the pillows, ass up for him.

There’s the noise of a slap and the sting on your butt cheeks, right before a soft kiss is placed on top of the surely red mark. His hands roam around your body and you shiver when he grabs your hair. “Crisse, tu as l'air si chaud,” (holy shit, you look so hot) Anthony slaps you booty again and finally slips his finger at your entrance feeling your wetness pool around. You’re already ready for him again and he seems pleased with the realization. So pleased it doesn’t take long for him to slip inside of you hitting just the right spot. Your body shots upward and he holds you by your waist keeping your butt bent. 

“Anthony,” you moan loudly when he starts moving ruthlessly inside of you. There’s something hot about how his body is being aggressive and you are taking it all, how his hips are almost knocking your body down, “right - fucking - there,” you whine and he keeps going, this time grabbing your hair and making your body lean towards him. 

“Whose name are you screaming tonight, bébé?” he mumbles bending his own body on top of yours without completely letting go of the position. 

“Yours,” your answer between groans. 

“Let me hear you” 

And you do.

You say his name out loud and clear, and you’re almost sure the neighbors are going to hear it. Yet you do it again and again while the sound of your voice is mixed with the noise of his skin hitting your skin and his feral grunts. He’s big and hard inside you and every time he goes out to get inside again you can feel your pussy stretching out to accommodate him. 

“Beau,” you moan and he chuckles leaning his body down to kiss your back. You see from the corner of your eyes when he finds the black marker on the top of your drawer, you can almost see his head working on ideas, and then he’s grabbing the sharpie you were using to write on your sticky notes earlier today. 

His body is straight up again and his movements are now slower, as he unclasps the marker and you feel its cold material hit your skin. There’s a long up and then down movement, you’re almost sure it’s an M, and then there’s a harsh line of an I, you can hear his grunts louder and he stops himself for a second before shooting his body towards yours again. The sharpie finds your skin again, this time to draw an N, you knew he was doing it big, not only for his eyes, but for you to feel and to know exactly what it was as he wrote the last letter, an E. 

You roll your eyes when he closes and throws the sharpie somewhere in the room before leaving another one of his blows on your butt cheeks. Anthony swings his arm around your torso bringing you up to him, your back hitting his solid chest, “you’re mine,” and that’s what it takes for you to come undone on his still hard cock. Your whole body trembles and your vision goes blurry again, there are tears in your eyes, and this time your moans turn into screams of satisfaction. 

He keeps fucking you through your high and you curse dropping your head back on his shoulder. His hand sneaks in front of your body to touch your sensitive clit, and you hold it sinking your nails on his skin. “Oh fuck,” he grunts drawing his finger deeper. You’re not sure if your body can’t take so much pleasure.

“Let me ride you,” it’s a prayer, a plea, a cry, and you can feel his lips on your neck before your bodies are turned and you’re on top taking him deeper, touching new spots. 

“That’s it, bébé,” he praises you and you roll your hips using your last energies. His hands find their way to your thighs and his short nails dig on your skin bringing you impossibly closer. There’s a deep grunt from him and a small whine from you. It’s hard for your eyes to focus, and you use your body to pin his down and your tied hands find his neck before squeezing it. His hips shot up under you and you scream, tightening your grip on him and squeezing his dick inside of you. 

You can feel another knot on the pitch of your belly, but this time it feels different to recognize this new sensation. That’s when you notice the wetness under you dripping onto his cock to his belly button and in the bed. 

“Fuck,” he moans, “Oh shit, you’re squirting,” his big hands go to your back and he keeps shooting his hips up to meet your pussy, “that’s it, bébé, give it to me once more,” and you’re squeezing him one last time before giving both of you a mind-blowing orgasm. Your body tumbles on top of his and this time things go pitch black instead of blurry. You can still feel his hot body under you and his rapid heartbeat, but your body is fluttering and there’s nothing in front of you. There’s only his body. There’s only your boyfriend existing under you with his cock still deep inside of you. 

It’s seconds before his caresses on your back become some kind of poking, “y/n?” 

“Huh?” you mumble, your voice raspy. He chuckles.

“Fuck, you passed out,” he sounds proud and you giggle. 

“That was the best sex we’ve ever had,” you confess without finding the strength to move your hands and caress him back, but Anthony keeps the tip of his fingers moving softly around your body, “I think I should talk more about Sidney Crosby, huh?” you joke and his hips shot upward making you moan Anthony’s name. Although he just came, he’s still hard and deep inside your soaked pussy.

“What were you saying?” he questions with a smug grin. “I think you were saying something about a certain player, Sidney Crosby maybe?” 

You arch your eyebrows, “who’s Sidney Crosby? I only know Anthony Beauvillier,” and he laughs at your answer before kissing your lips softly. You know there’s gonna be a time for water and a fruit snack later and then he’s going again, because he’s never done until you’re completely wrecked, the only name able to escape your lips being his. 

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[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

Fools in Love

Summary: He can explain how String Theory works. He can figure out Riemann Hypothesis. He can recite all the numbers of pi until he’s blue in the face. Yet somehow, Spencer Reid can’t figure out what to do for his first first anniversary. 

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader 

Warnings: Spencer Reid is a self-deprecating mf, Jane Austen quotes? But there’s a happy ending 

Word Count: 3128

Fools in Love

He scratches the back of neck, a nervous habit that he’s sure makes him look weak. He wants to find the perfect recipe to make a wonderful meal for Y/N. It’s his first first anniversary so Spencer’s completely lost as to what to do. Y/N deserves the most romantic dinner, especially considering how much chaos he causes. It must be a lot to put up with him, Spencer thinks. He’s even more useless when it comes to love than when it comes to cooking. While he might not be a fan of technology, given he has the Thai place down the street from his apartment on speed dial. She doesn’t deserve some take out Thai with paper plates. But he’s a scientist, a well-known and well-educated scientist who is completely failing at planning his first anniversary.

It was useless. Completely and utterly useless, Spencer thought to himself as he ran his fingers across the various titles of cookbooks. Some featured complex dishes from Korea and others were 30 minute meals of the vaguely Midwest variety. Spencer never in his entire 33 years of living felt so out of place in a library. He’s so at home in between the stacks of books, he finds the comforting words of long dead authors and intricate mathematical theories a second home. However, it seems that Spencer Reid has found the most intimidating section of the library: cooking.

And what do academics do when they are at a crossroad? Well, they call in the experts. The love expert came in the shape of Agent Derek Morgan himself. This idea just might be the most brilliant thought Spencer’s had or the dumbest, but Y/N is worth it. 

Okay, maybe it was a mistake to come to Derek, Spencer thinks as he sits in front of his friend, a coffee in his hand and an expression of pure fear on his face. 

“You want me to, what?” Spencer asks, shocked at Derek’s suggestive advice.  

“Lie in bed naked, call Y/N on the phone and make something up. You’ll be waiting in bed and then BAM! Anniversary sex,” Derek says, his eyebrows wagging as he sips his coffee. 

“Are you messing with me, Morgan?” Spencer says, his face pale from the very thought of lounging in bed naked, waiting for Y/N to come over to his apartment.

“Why not, I’m sure it would get you laid,” Derek reasons. Get me laid? Spencer and Y/N don’t get laid, he thinks. They do have sex, but it’s not getting laid. It’s more romantic and loving than just whatever Derek suggests. 

God, he can’t tell Derek that, he’d never live it down. 

“You have slept with Y/N, right?” Derek asks, suddenly nervous that he touched a nerve with his friend. As much as he likes to tease, Spencer knows that Derek doesn’t mean any harm, hence why he’s the first person he thought to come to. 

“We prefer to call it making love,” Spencer says, pretending to be very interested in his chocolate donut and trying to fight off the blush that rises to his cheeks. Even a year into their relationship, Spencer still gets butterflies at thinking about Y/N like that. 

“So you want this to be more romantic than just fucking, because you’ve done it for a year?” Derek proposes as simply as if he’s talking about a case. Not that talking about serial victims is anymore normal or weirder than the current conversation. 

“Morgan and you please stop talking about Y/N and sex in the same sentence?” Spencer says through gritted teeth. 

“Reid, kid. I’m just busting your chops, I know who you feel about Y/N. When you two are in the same room, it’s like there’s no one else in the world. And it’s kinda hard to get your mind to focus on one thing, but Y/N does that,” 

“I know,” Spencer says. “I can’t mess this up Derek. I can’t give another person a reason to leave me,” 

“Y/N won’t leave because you can’t plan a terrible anniversary dinner,” Derek says comfortingly. 

“I checked out 7 cookbooks, Morgan. 7, and I read them on the metro home. It’s useless, I’m useless,” Spencer laments.

He looks up to try to read Derek’s expression. The last thing he’d want to see on his face is pity or worse laughter. No, Spencer. Derek is your best friend. He’s the closest thing you have to a brother. Spencer feels almost guilty for thinking that Derek would laugh at him, while he might like to tease him, especially about his lovelife, they trust each other inexplicably. What’s written on Derek’s face is not pity or ridicule, it’s a smile. A smile not for Spencer, but for the colorful woman walking towards their table. 

“You told Garcia?” Spencer groans, but scooting over so Penelope would have a spot to sit with them. 

“Of course I told Garcia, kid. You know better than anyone that we can’t keep anything secret,” Derek explains, leaning in to kiss Garcia’s hand. 

“Spencer Reid! I can’t believe you,” Garcia says, smacking Spencer’s arm lightly. 

“Garcia!” Spencer shouts, clutching his coffee and hunching down in his seat to avoid being hit by the tech goddess with her hard rings on her surprisingly strong hands. 

“Don’t Garcia me, Reid. You need me, whether or not you realize it or not. I’m irreplaceable,” she tells him, grabbing a pink notebook and a fluffy green pen from her bag. 

Spencer nods in understanding, as much as he hates it, he knows that he needs help. It’s just a hard pill to swallow when help comes in the form of Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia, perhaps the two people on Earth who are the most in love. 

“I know I need you guys,” Spencer says, looking from Garcia to Derek, half expecting them to tell him to order some terrifying sex toy from a scretchy store on the edge of town or something equally horrifying. 

“What’s something that she likes? You know like a special thing that Y/N would never think about getting herself” Garcia asks, making notes with the fluffy when that bounces as she writes. 

“She likes to read,” Spencer suggests, thinking about the first date that they had. They talked for hours about their favorite books and ended up getting booted from the library for overstaying their welcome. Y/N found it quite endearing that The Little Prince is Spencer’s while her is anything and everything by Jane Austen. He thinks back to her eyes gleamed when talking about the book, or how passionate she got when she argued that Mr Knightley and Emma were soulmates. 

“Okay, that’s a start Spencer. Really good,” Garcia says, trying to boost her friend’s confidence. 

“What else?” Derek asks, thinking about the times when he and Y/N hang out with Spencer and Penelope. 

“Fret not, Boy Wonder,” Garcia says, softly patting Spencer’s shoulder, “I’ll take care of this,” she finishes as she reaches into her bag, that seems to have a never ending bottom, and pulls out a laptop. 

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“So Garcia and Morgan took over your anniversary plans and basically just made it how they’d want to spend their anniversary?” JJ offers, as she hands Spencer a beer from her refrigerator and sits back down at her kitchen table. 

Spencer takes a swig of his beer and shrugs his shoulders, thinking about how wrong this whole anniversary dinner has gone. 

“I just wanted this to be special, JJ. I know it’s only been a year, but Y/N is it for me. God, she was it for me on the third date,” Spencer confesses. 

“I know, Spence. I’ve never seen you this happy. Happiness looks good on you,” JJ tells him. 

“Y/N makes me happy, she puts up with me, so the least I can do is make this perfect for her,” 

“Spence, don’t sell yourself short,” JJ says, “You’re a kind man and a wonderful boyfriend, you’re both lucky to have each other,” 

“Thank you, JJ, but Y/N is the better person in this relationship. That’s why this needs to be perfect,” Spencer explains, his self doubt still littering his mind. 

“What about a baseball game? You can pay for a message to pop up on the Jumbotron. Like Happy Anniversary, Y/N,” JJ suggests, and Spencer really can’t tell if JJ is joking. She can’t possibly think that Y/N and he would have a romantic anniversary with the threat of getting pelted in the face with a baseball. 

“Sports games are not our forte, JJ. I honestly can’t tell who’d hate sitting in the sun for hours with angry sports fans,” Spencer adds. 

“Okay so no sports, I should have figured, Spence,” JJ winks knowingly. “How about this, think about somewhere that’s special to you two. Somewhere that makes you think of her,” 

“The thing is JJ, everyplace we’ve been together makes me think of her. The elevator when she first kissed me, the movie theater we always go to on Saturday nights, even the sidewalk outside my apartment building. Everything makes me think of her because she’s my everything,” Spencer says, hiding his discomfort at the conversation. 

“Spence, I think that anything you plan, will be wonderful. Have a little trust in yourself for once, Y/N is already head over heels in love with you, so I doubt that she’d really care where you go or what you do,” JJ advises, clearing up the dirty dishes from their Friday night pizza dinner with the boys. 

“I’m going to go JJ, thanks for talking me out of my head. If I took Morgan’s advice, I’d probably end up with a restraining order,” Spencer jokes, putting his jacket on and saying goodbye to his friend. 

“You think you need an Uber?” JJ asks, but immediately finds amusement from Spencer’s disgust at the idea of getting into an Uber. 

“Germs and technology sound like a nightmare, JJ. And I’m not going to remind you of the statistics regarding missing persons and those rideshare apps-” Spencer offers, but is cut off by JJ’s pretend annoyance. 

“Remind me to send Y/N combat pay, you know maybe she is a saint for putting up with you,” JJ teases. 

He walks out into the chill of the night, recounting the advice his friends gave him. Derek and Penelope’s plan was a little outlandish, a little too much for Spencer and Y/N. JJ, who Spencer knows means well, only served to remind him of how hard it must be with him. His steps are slow and languid, but his mind anything but. 

One step, you’re probably just a charity case that Y/N decided to save. 

Two steps, why on Earth would a woman like her even look at a man like you.

Three steps, you’re so pathetic that you can’t even plan a dinner for her. She’s too good for Spencer, you’ll ruin her. 

Everyone who you love leaves you or dies, anyway.

It’s that thought, not the thought of being alone, but the thought that he deserves to be alone that sends the tears down his cheeks. 

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Somehow, someway, Spencer made it back to his apartment. It never felt so dark, so unlike home. Maybe he just didn’t never realized that these walls aren’t home without Y/N. He really should try to get to sleep, but he’d rather fend off sleep with the endless supply of coffee than have to face a night alone in the cold bed. 

Just as Spencer makes his way to prepare a cup of coffee, he hears a distant jiggle of keys and the door knob rattle. And in comes Y/N, as fresh as the cup of coffee brewing and as beautiful as ever. 

“Happy Anniversary, my love,” Y/N tells him, dropping the bags on the floor. She moves over to him like a light breeze. All he wants is to welcome her embrace. He wants to scoop her up and carry her far away from the monsters that lie in wake. He feels an urge to be her protector, but how can be her protector when what he really wants is to be protected. 

“Y/N, what are you doing here, it’s so late,” Spencer says, praying that his voice doesn’t let go. He knows it’s futile, one look from Y/N, her palm to his cheek or even worse a chaste kiss on his forehead, Spencer would not be able to think. What is a genius without his mind? 

“I couldn’t wait for tomorrow, Spence, I just missed you too much,” Y/N says, her voice a prayer that spins around in Spencer’s brain, searching for refuge in his heart. 

“You really missed me?” Spencer asks, desperately wanting to believe her beyond belief. Y/N’s frown searches for an answer in Spencer’s distant expression. Even though they stand there with the kitchen light casting shadows touching as much skin as they can reach, Spencer is a million miles away.

“Of course I missed you, baby. And I just had to give you one of your gifts tonight. I just couldn’t wait to see your face,” Y/N says, practically bouncing as she bounds off to get the package for Spencer. 

“So this is only the first part, and stay with me, I know how much you hate technology, but I think you’ll make an excuse for this,” She tells him, handing him a heavy cube shaped package. It’s decorated in Y/N’s handwritten flowers and hearts, and a cute doodle of who Spencer can only assume is them. His girlfriend may not be artistic. But she’s the artist who paints the stars in Spencer’s night sky. She’s the tailor who sewed him back up when he was broken. She’s the architect who has the key and blueprint to his heart. 

Spencer opens the gift, his hands shaky and unsure. He’s terrified that Y/N can see right though him. He reveals the present. It’s a small wooden box with a red wooden heart that looks like it’s supposed to be pixelated. There’s a blank space on the top, that Spencer supposes is a screen.

“You gotta plug it in, Spence. So the messages can pop up. When you're far away from me saving the world, I can type a message from my phone and it’ll appear on your box,” she explains. Spencer looks up at her trying to search for what he did to get this lucky. 

“Thank you, this is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me,” Spencer tells her, placing a kiss against her forehead. It’s the kind of kisses that tell you so much more. It’s the kind of kiss you give when you know there’s more where that one came from. It’s safe and warm and everything good about this world. 

“I gotta make sure you won’t forget me when you go traipsing all over the country. A hot genius like you only comes around so often. I’m sure you got loads of attractive people throwing themselves at you, Spence,” she says with a wink. 

“Hot genius?” Spencer repeats half dumbfounded and half joking. 

“Yup, I gotta make sure they know that you’re spoken for,” 

“I couldn’t forget you even if I tried, Y/N. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me. I still don’t know what I did to ever deserve you,” Spencer says, as the tears and the fears of not being good enough bubble to the surface. 

“Spencer, baby. You’re shaking. What’s the matter? Huh,” she says softly, brushing her hand over Spencer’s head in a comforting and loving gesture. 

Spencer leans into her, his head pressed into her neck. He can hear her heartbeat and he can smell her perfume. He wants to get lost in her. Get lost in the feeling of total and complete love. 

“I just wanted this to be perfect, Y/N. For you- you deserve so much more than I can give. It must be so hard dating me. I know that I’m difficult to love sometimes,” Spencer murmurs, his tears pouring down his cheeks and spilling like his darkest thoughts onto Y/N’s shirt. 

“Spencer, you make my life so much brighter. So much fuller. I know that you got a lot going on up in that mind of yours and it must be kinda scary. It must be hard always being the guy people expect answers from. But I got you, sweetheart. And I’m not letting go,” Y/N tells him the words falling from lips like a psalm and taking on a new life in Spencer’s heart. 

“Thank you, Y/N. I really wanted this to be the best anniversary. I’m sorry I’m such a mess,” Spencer apologizes as he peppers light, feathery kisses along her collarbone and up to her eyes. 

“Well you’re my mess, Spencer. Let’s be honest, I’d be completely happy to spend our anniversary anywhere with you. Except maybe sports games, that sounds like torture for both of us,” Y/N laughs and Spencer can’t get over how she practically glows in the kitchen light. It could be that his mind is foggy with love, but Spencer hopes that he never grows out of this blissful feeling. 

“Well it’s a good thing we’ll have many more to make up for this one,” Spencer says, letting himself get dragged to the large fluffy sofa. 

“Oh no, Mister. The next 50 anniversaries have to try to top this one,” Y/N tells him and Spencer’s heart skips and flutters at the thought of having another 49 anniversaries with Y/N by his side. 

“I doubt that 50 will be enough, Y/N” 

“As long as you’ll allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you,” Y/N says, cuddling so close to Spencer that she can’t see where her limbs start and Spencer’s end. 

“If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more,” Spencer says running his spidery fingers down Y/N’s side much to her delight. 

“Ooh are you trying out some Jane Austen foreplay? Because that’s the way to make my panties drop,” Y/N says suggestively as she rubs her hand over Spencer’s chest and rests it on his neck. 

“Maybe tomorrow, I just really want to hold you close right now, Y/N.” Spencer says, sweetly kissing along her temple exciting a bout of giggles from the two of them. 

Spencer very well might be useless when it comes to love, but he was eager to learn that he’s worthy of love from his love expert. 

[sketching-shark]

LMK fandom: Oh, what do we do about this guy who has nothing but hurt Xiaotian, tried to replace Sun Wukong and his crew, hurt Tripitaka and ordered servants to cannibalize a monkey? Oh I know! We’ll turn him into our little meow meow~ he’s so innocent and Sun Wukong is obviously the villain!

What doesn’t help is this idea is perpetuated by multiple fan fic writers and artists for some reason. Especially some aus they make that turn SWK into a bastard for the sake of the story rather than considering cultural context and thinking they should be respectful.

And almost everyone lets them get away with it just because the art or fanfic is good and they get so popular that no one can point what is actually wrong without feeling like they’re going to get attacked.

I'm starting to feel like my blog is the one anons go to specifically to vent their frustrations about the Six Eared Macaque in his lego monkey show form & the associated fandom lmao. But I guess this makes sense, as I’ve had fun quasi-dragging him before & will in fact use this anon submission as an opportunity to have my own, to put it academically, bitch fest about not just this fandom's favorite protagonist-traumatizing meow meow, but about the way villains are often treated in not just fanon, but increasingly in canon works as well. But same policy as with the last anon; I'll post my opinions below the cut, and as fandoms love to say, don’t like don't read if you don't want to see me dunking on the six eared simian & common fandom tendencies towards villains.

Oh man I would say where would you even begin with this but anon you’ve pretty much started yourself with my main gripe with a lot of ways that the Six-Eared Macaque is portrayed in fandom; there seems to be this unspoken agreement that his acts of violence towards Sun Wukong, Qi Xioatian, and Qi Xioatian’s loved ones are either to be framed as somewhat or totally justified, to be immediately forgiven/excused, or to simply & completely be ignored. Like friends maybe this is just me not seeing the proper posts but while the fandom is inundated with art and fanfics of Macaque as a generally decent individual & a true member of team good guy, I have yet to see one person address the fact that this monkey literally kidnapped & mind-controlled Xiaotian’s best friend and father figures & forced them to brutalize Xiaotian while ol’ Six Ear looked on and laughed (X_X). Like this kind of fandom villain treatment is definitely not something that’s solely at work for Monkie Kid, but it is kind of nutty how fandoms will swing between yelling that people should be allowed to like villains without even mild critique, and then will just flat-out not address the villainous behavior, and will even bend over backwards to frame even characters who committed genocide as just poor innocent widdle victims who need a hug. At its worst, I’ve even seen tons of people in a fandom get really angry at other people who don’t like a villain, and will even start accusing those people of hating real-life mentally disabled or abused individuals all because they don’t like the fandom’s favorite literal war criminal. The Monkie Kid fandom is FAR more chill & better than a lot of other fandoms I’ve come across in that regard, but that is an exceedingly low bar, & the tendency to woobify certain kinds of villains-- as with Macaque and the extreme emphasis on his bad boy/sad boy thing--is very much at work.  

 I’ve also talked before about a kind of monoculturalization of certain character interpretations and story beats in fandoms, and one of the more popular ones that seems to be applied to Macaque a lot is the “hero actually bad, villain actually good” cliche, as observable from the general fandom assumption that Mr. Six-Ears he wasn’t even slightly lying or remembering things through a rose-tinted or skewed lens when he gave his version of his and Sun Wukong’s past. Like at this point it seems the possibility that people WILL NOT even consider is that Sun Wukong never did & still doesn't care that much about the Six Eared Macaque (in JTTW they weren’t sworn brothers & in Monkie Kid the only thing the monkey king really said to Macaque before attacking him was a pretty contemptuous "Aren't you ever going to get sick of living under my shadow?," & responds to his "beloved friend" getting blown up with "You did good, bud" to Qi Xiaotian, who did the exploding), or that their original fight may in fact have mostly been instigated by Macaque. After all, to repeat what this anon summarized & what I've said before about their original JTTW context (& in an example of the things that do feel like it's often lost in translation) is that the Six Ear Macaque was a villain not just because he beat up the Tang Monk, but because he wanted to take over Sun Wukong's entire life and identity so he could have all that glory, prestige, and power for himself. To quote the macaque himself from the Anthony C. Yu translation, "I struck the T'ang monk and I took the luggage...precisely because I want to go to the West all by myself to ask Buddha for the scriptures. When I deliver them to the Land of the East, it will be my success and no one else's. Those people of the South Jambudvipa Continent will honor me then as their patriarch and my fame will last for all posterity." And in order to do this, the Six Eared Macaque had apparently made Sun Wukong's "little ones," his monkey family, his captives through either trickery or force, and gotten a number of them to take on the appearance of Tang Sanzang and the other pilgrims. It's also made clear that in very direct contrast to Sun Wukong, he doesn't care about these monkeys beyond how they might serve him. In fact, after Sha Wujing kills the monkey posing as him the Six Eared Macaque not only all but immediately replaces him with another, but also "told his little ones to have the dead monkey skinned. Then his meat was taken to be fried and served as food along with coconut and grape wines." So this monkey is not only willing to risk the lives of a lot of other monkeys for his own personal benefit, but is also a literal cannibal. And yes yes, I know a lot of people have argued that Monkie Kid shouldn't be considered a direct sequel to JTTW & that's fair enough (for example, Sun Wukong probably shouldn't be smashing anyone into a meat patty in a children's cartoon lol). And of course, it needs to be noted that there are a buttload of really out there & really cursed pieces of media based on JTTW & that were created in China. Yet the above description is the oft-ignored in the west original facet of the Six Eared Macaque's character. And it is this selfishness, entitlement, and treatment of other individuals as tools for his own self-serving ends  that is, from where I’m standing, still very much present in Monkie Kid. Like besides repeatedly going out of his way to physically and psychologically traumatize Xioatian, with the last episode Macaque seemed to be going right back to his manipulative ways. I’ve seen people frame their last conversation as Macaque softening to Xioatian a little bit, but personally that read a lot more like that common tactic among abusers where even after they’ve hurt you they’ll dangle something you want or need over your head (in Macaque’s case, the promise of desperately needed training and information about a serious looming threat), with the implication that you’ll only get it if you do what they want you to, such as, in this case, Xioatian going back to Macaque as his student even after having been so terribly hurt by this monkey, which would give Macaque power over Xiaotian and probably Sun Wukong as a result. And it is this violence and manipulation that it seems the fandom at large has tacitly decided shouldn’t even be addressed, instead leaning more towards a (and this is an exaggeration) “Six-Eared Macaque my poor meow meow Sun Wukong has always been bad & has always been wrong about literally everything” reading. 

And while it is the case that I am not Chinese and feel that as such it would be best left to someone who actually comes from that background to provide more context into how common interpretations of the Six Eared Macaque from China may clash really badly with the stuff the western fandom creates, it also must be noted that, as much as we all want to have fun in fandom & in spite of all the out-there versions of JTTW from China, we westerners should recognize that there is a very long and very ugly history of western countries stripping other cultures’ important religious and literary works for parts & mashing them into their own thing while implying or even insisting that what they present provides a true understanding of the original piece. And while I trust most individuals in regards to Monkie Kid are able to step back and think “this is a lego cartoon and not a set guide for how I should understand JTTW” (especially given the insistence that JTTW and Monkie Kid should be considered there own separate works) there does nevertheless seem to be something of a tendency to take the conclusions people come to, for example, about Sun Wukong’s characteristic in his lego form & then assume that’s just reflective to Sun Wukong as a totality. I imagine a good portion of this is due to people not reading JTTW & especially to not having easy access to solid information or answers about JTTW’s many different facets (like geez awhile ago I was trying to get a clear answer on what is considered the most accurate translation of the names of Sun Wukong’s six sworn brothers & got like 5 different responses lmao), but that tendency to take a western fandom interpretation & run with it instead of doing any background research or questioning said interpretation is still very much at play. As such, & as made prominent in the way people have been interpreting the dynamic between Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque in the lego monkey show, tbh it does seem kind of shitty for western creators & audience to sometimes go really out of their way to ignore all of this original cultural & narrative context for the sake of Angst (TM) in Macaque's favor, demonizing Sun Wukong, and shipping the monkey king with his evil twin (X_X).

And speaking of which, even beyond the potential inherent creepiness & revulsion that can be inspired by this specific ship given common interpretations of the og classic's original meaning (again, it's my understanding, given both summaries of translated Chinese academic texts I've been kindly provided with, my own reading of the Anthony C. Yu translation of JTTW, & vents from a number of Chinese people I've seen on this site, that the Six-Eared Macaque is commonly interpreted in China as having originated from Sun Wukong himself as a living embodiment of his worst traits, hence why only Buddha can tell the difference between them & why the monkey king is much more slow to violence after he kills the macaque), I'd argue that in the face of all the uwu poor widdle meow meow portrayals lego show Macaque is, especially if you include JTTW's events, still in the role of “Sun Wukong but worse” as he is very much a violent & selfish creep. Like he was basically running around in JTTW wearing a Sun Wukong fursuit, but there he had the sole reason of wanting to replace Sun Wukong wholesale so he could have all the good things in the monkey king's life without actually having to work as hard for them. But if you combine that with Macaque now claiming that he used to be best friend with Sun Wukong in his pre-journey days (something that's made funny from a JTTW context given that that status actually belongs to the Demon Bull King lol), his original violence has now blown into this centuries long and really unhealthy obsession with the monkey king. Like he's apparently gone from wanting to literally be Sun Wukong to being so obsessed with getting revenge on Sun Wukong that he's got basically nothing else going on in his life. Like he's only appeared in two episodes but...does he have any friends? Any family? A career or even a hobby that DOESN'T center the monkey king? Anything at all outside of his "get revenge on and/or kill Sun Wukong/use his successor as my personal punching bag” thing? Like dude! That is extremely creepy and extremely bad for everyone all around! As I’ve said before, this seeming refusal to see beyond the past or to do something that doesn’t involve Sun Wukong in some capacity is a trait that makes Macaque an interesting and somewhat tragic villain--he even seems to be working as Sun Wukong’s reflection in a mirror darkly, with lego show Sun Wukong pretty clearly not being able to heal from his own past which is hinted to be defined by one loss after another, and with Monkie Kid even kind of having these two characters somewhat follow their JTTW characterizations in that in the latter half of the journey Sun Wukong often gets sad & starts crying in the face of what seems insurmountable odds (& Monkie Kid Sun Wukong does seem to be hiding some serious depression behind a cheerful facade), whereas the Six-Eared Macaque retains a worse version of Sun Wukong’s pre-journey characteristic of getting pissed and lashing out if things don’t go his way--but it’s also what would make any current friendship or romantic relationship between these monkeys horrific. Although to be fair even the fandom seems to recognize this in an unconscious way, in that a lot of the art & fanfic seems to swing erratically between them kissing & screaming at each other in yet another example of bog-standard fandom adulation of romanticized toxic relationships lol.  

At the end of the day, of course, this is nothing new. You'll find versions of this dynamic across a ton of fandoms and now even canonical work. And as such, I can only look at this kind of popularized relationship dynamic with a kind of resigned weariness whenever it pops up, & my frustrated question with the popularity of this kind of pairing is the exact same one that I have for a multitude of blatantly toxic villain/hero ships, given common fandom discourse & the tendency to either ignore or justify the villain's actions & demonize the hero: if you're THAT convinced that everything is the hero's fault, if you believe THAT much that the hero is the one in the wrong for the villain's pain and their subsequent actions, then why are you so set on them not only becoming a romantic pair, but framing this get-together as a good thing? Like I know we contain multitudes but that's waaay too many contradictions for me to wrap my head around. And it definitely doesn’t help that one branch of underlying reasoning behind this kind of pairing seems to be the ever-present “you break it, you fix it” mentality, where the assumption is that if you’re in a failing, abusive, and/or generally toxic relationship (platonically or romantically), if you put in enough time and effort & attempts to compromise, you’ll be able to restore/have the relationship you dreamed of, even with someone who hurt you really badly. And this assumption isn’t limited to fandom: I’d even argue that it’s everywhere in the culture, hence why a lot of people feel like they “failed” if they have to get a divorce or make the choice to leave an unhealthy friendship. Personally, I feel like people could really benefit from more stories about how it is not only the case that the people you hurt don’t owe you their forgiveness & you can still become a better and happier person without the one you hurt in your life, & that while it can be really hard it can also be a good thing to leave a relationship, even if it’s one that once meant a lot to you. 

  But in all honestly, from my own perspective this kind of pairing is starting to read far less like enemies to lovers and far more like a horrible fantasy where you can pull whatever shit you want, even on the people you "love," & never be held accountable for your terrible behavior or even have to consider that maybe you were in the wrong. It's another facet that makes me larf every time I see people insist that fandom is an inherently "transformative" or "progressive" form of storytelling like friends you are literally just taking status quo toxic monogamy & rebranding it as somehow beneficial & romantic (X_X).

But as to anon’s last frustration, it is hard to know what is the appropriate response with this kind of thing...like for my own part I’m keeping my frustrations to my blog & now increasingly to posts that you would have to click on the “read more” button to see what I have to say, but I totally get the hesitation to give even a mild critique to big names in a fandom. Like I've now seen it happen repeatedly where someone who has a big name in a fandom will make something that's kind of shitty for one reason or another, someone will message them with some version of "hey, that's kind of shitty, you shouldn't do that," and the typical response is either to blatantly ignore the issue completely, or more popularly to make a giant crying circus that seems deliberately geared towards stoking emotions on both sides of the, for example, fiction does/doesn't affect reality issue so that something that didn't even have to be that big a deal gets blown out of all proportion, with the big name often framing what often started out as a very mild critique into a long crying jag about how the initial response to their kind of shitty thing was so mean/cruel and they're just a poor innocent & that YOU'RE the true racist/sexist/bigot etc. if you don't agree with their opinion. It must of course be noted that there have also been numerous instances of people taking it too far the other way & sending not just big names but smaller creators literal deaths threats over stuff like innocuous ships which like holy hell bells people that’s a horrible thing to do. But for the big names at least, the end result of all this fighting is usually that once the dust has settled they have more attention/fame/money/power in the fandom than before, and with anyone who might have a problem with their stuff feeling afraid to voice their opinion lest they be swarmed by that person's fans. In that way fandom does often seem to increasingly be geared towards presenting an “official” fandom perspective about various facets of a piece of media instead of allowing for a multitude of interpretations, and with criticism, no matter its shape or form or how genuinely warranted it may be, being hounded out of existence. I feel like a lot of this could be made less bad if there wasn’t this constant assumption & even drive to think that a different interpretation of or criticism of your favorite work of fiction or your fanwork isn’t a direct claim that you are a thoroughly loathsome individual (& maybe also if people cultivated an enjoyment of learning things about important works from a culture outside their own, even if what you learn clashes with your own initial understandings), but I guess we’ll see if that ever happens. 

So these are my general thinks about the Six Eared Macaque’s current fandom meow meow status & some of my bigger gripes with fandom tendencies as a whole. I stand by my idea that the most interesting & beneficial route for Macaque moving forward would be a kind of “redemption without forgiveness from the ones you hurt” arc--as I think was done pretty excellently with the character Grace in Infinity Train--and if for no other reason than gosh dern this monkey really needs to cultivate some sort of identity beyond his “Sun Wukong but worse” persona.