#not gonna number them because i don't think i'll be able to do them all

[chaggiehearts]

I'm gonna be brutally honest: I think it'd be far more satisfying to watch Lute redeeming herself than dying as a villain.

I know a large part of the fandom hates her (although thankfully most people here on Tumblr don't) and I'm not gonna act like I don't understand why. She's a sadistic genocidal woman who won't hesitate to hurt everyone that goes against her corrupted morality. Even outside the series, her words and beliefs might remind a lot of viewers of extremist Christians, and since a lot of us are LGBT we might be reminded of ugly things we've been told in the past (I'll admit that even though I don't interpret that scene as her being homophobic, the "Their love is vile and blasphemous" comment might hurt me if I watch that scene when I'm feeling too sensitive). Lute is clearly not a good person and the series doesn't try to hide this fact at all, specially given her fixation with hurting/mutilating/killing Vaggie. Even though she's my 3rd fave character, I admit that she kinda sucks as a person.

However, I think that all the arguments on why she's irredeemable fail to be convincing once you take something into account: Lute is the Vaggie that never left her Exorcist position.

Their characters are clearly parallels and meant to be narrative foils. Vaggie is what Lute could turn out to be if she admitted she's wrong. Vaggie is my favorite character but I can't deny that before her fall she was despicable too. We know that at the very least she killed 2,000 sinners (going by the "thousandS of Sinners" comment) and I highly doubt the actual amount is that low given the number of Sinners killed by Lute during last Extermination. My personal headcanon is that it's around 10,000-15,000, but we don't know, at least not yet. Vaggie WASN'T a good person, even if she had doubts from the very beginning (which we don't even know if it's true, let's be real here) she still did horrible things. She took part in the Exterminations and, according to Adam, she was one of the most efficient Exorcists (perhaps second only to Lute herself). This is why I adore the dynamic between them, because the mutual hatred comes from the rejection of certain ideals: Vaggie hates what she used to be in the past, which is represented by Lute, a perfect reflection of who she used to be, and Lute hates the idea that Exterminations might be wrong, that she might be wrong, that her entire worldview might be flawed, which is represented by Vaggie.

If Vaggie was able to redeem herself, if we can collectively agree that she regretted her actions and improved as a person, if we can understand that Hazbin's concept is that EVERYONE can be redeemed, even the worst villains, even the nastiest individuals, if we can see that the structure of the Exorcists greatly resembles a sect (I will analyze this better another day, but they're literally a patriarchal sect in which one has to adhere to all of their leader's beliefs and not doing so will result in abandonment, punishment and isolation from your entire circle), isn't it logical to think that Lute might reach the same conclusions as Vaggie one day? Why would Vaggie deserve compassion and forgiveness and a new life and not someone who's overall very similar to her? As I said before, yes, I do understand why people hate Lute more than Vaggie, specially given what she did to her, one of the protagonists, but they're not that different at all. The issue is that we've only seen evil Lute and good Vaggie so far, but the series might explore other aspects of their characters. Hazbin Hotel criticizes the black-and-white mentality of Heaven, Lute's very mentality that has led to what she is right now. Putting Vaggie in one end of a morality scale and Lute in the other is imho a flawed interpretation. They're both in a gray place, they're both complex people.

Lute is going to do horrible things in the future and, if I'm allowed to speculate, I heavily believe she's going to be worse than what Adam ever had the chance to be, way worse than Vaggie ever was. After losing Adam, revenge will probably make her go from evil to downright monster. And honestly, I want to see that fall, that corruption arc (does it count as a corruption arc when the character was already corrupted from the beginning?). I want Lute to metaphorically fall into the darkest pits of Hell. And you know what? I want her to get up after that, start a new life just like what Vaggie did. I think Lute searching for redemption would be a great test on Charlie's ideals, because she probably wouldn't be too enthusiastic about this idea (since her body language in Episode 8 clearly shows that she knows about what Lute did to Vaggie, her role in Vaggie's fall). I think something beautiful might come out of something like this happening. Charlie realizing that she doesn't have to personally empathize with someone to help them become a better person (and the whole concept of redemption being proven right because if someone like Lute can do it then literally anyone can), Lute seeing the error of her ways, growing and searching for the light she lost in the shadows and Vaggie empathizing with one of the residents in a deeper level. Even though Lute doesn't deserve Vaggie's forgiveness, I'd love to see Vaggie extending that forgiveness to her and seeing her past self in Lute, but this time not the merciless Exorcist Vaggie that she hates, but the hurt, lost and scared Vaggie that had just arrived in Hell after her worldview had been flipped entirely. If these two made amends, I think we would be able to see a very sweet new side of Vaggie, because even though she'd love to help Angel Dust, Husk, Cherri Bomb... She'll never fully get how they ended up down there. But she would get Lute, she'd understand how addictive bad actions can be for an Exorcist, the search for purpose and acknowledgement from Adam, the self-righteousness. If there's anyone in that hotel that would know what it's like to be an Exorcist that regrets her actions, that's Vaggie.

In the end, the only thing I'm sure of at the moment is that Lute's story is far from over. Things could go either way and redemption is a viable path for her. Who knows, maybe she'll do something so extremely evil in the future that I lose my faith in her ability to change after that, but for now I'm still holding onto that hope :)

[whispering-kavka]

the struggles of today proved to me that i might indeed be a little mentally unwell

[luveline]

𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 | 𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧

you get upset when eddie's friends think you're clingy. he sets you straight with some unbridled affection. requested here. fem!reader, 2.6k

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

The diner is bustling with life and smells alike, people in their summer jackets eager to sit down and dig into a plate of greasy, fatty meats. You're just as excited, your fingers curled into Eddie's sleeve and following his lead as he weaves through a gaggle of kids playing between the bar and the booths. 

"Sorry, sir," a young girl says to him, springing out of his path. 

"That's okay," he says, leaning back to squint at you curiously, "Do I look like a sir?" he asks you.

Pale faced, dark-haired, the remnants of last night's eyeliner clinging to his bottom lashes, you can't say you'd look at Eddie and think, Sir. Pretty boy extraordinaire with a rather inviting smile, absolutely. 

"I think so, sir," you say. 

Eddie laughs at you, pressing a hand behind your shoulders to move you along. His friend Gareth waves from a booth tucked in a corner under a white sconce. Jamison sits to his left, and Margaret to his right. You feel a little skip in your pulse at the sight —they intimidate you, and you want desperately for them to like you, only you never know what to say. 

"Hey," Eddie says as you approach the booth. He pushes you gently to encourage you into the seat first. "How's it going? Did we order?" 

"We were waiting for you. They said we have to go up to the bar when we're ready."

"We're late, I get it. Where's Jeff?" 

"He went to the bathroom, like, ten minutes ago," Jamison says with a sigh, climbing to his feet. "I'll go see if he's alright." 

"He's fine. Maggie, are you coming to order?" Gareth says, getting up with him. 

"Yes, finally!" she says. 

The relative chaos of your arrival has you hesitating in your seat. Margaret left her purse and her jacket on the table, and Jamison his keys. 

"You okay to stay here while I order?" Eddie asks. 

You'd much prefer Eddie order for you, but you don't want to be sitting here by yourself if Jamison and Jeff come back before him. You won't know what to say. It won't be their fault. You'll make things awkward for everyone. 

You stand up again, shedding your jacket as you do. No one's gonna steal anyone's stuff, the bar is too close. "I'll come with you."

Eddie slots your fingers together easily, grinning, "Lucky me." 

His friends order first and return to the booth soon after. You and Eddie get cut by a cranky looking old lady but neither of you say anything, nowhere to be and no reason to mind. He tells you about the guitar he's been repairing at work and you listen adoringly, in love with the shape of his lips and how he says every word. He's a great storyteller. 

A new friend appears once you've ordered. 

"Hey, Eddie!" one of the waiters says, appearing from the kitchen with a tray of drinks and fries in hand. "Man, I've been trying to get a hold of you all week. The string on my daughter's guitar flew off, nearly blinded her in the process, would you be able to fix that for me? I'll pay you for your time." 

Eddie waves it off. "It'll only take five minutes, you can drop by whenever I'm home. Why do they keep splitting like that, is she messing with the pegs?" 

"She definitely is. Can I get your number? Macey washed my pants without emptying the pockets."

There's a mad scramble for a pen. You have one in your jacket because Eddie's always looking for one, but your jacket is back in the booth. You promise to make a hasty return and set off for it, glad to see Jeff's alright, standing at the table likely waiting for you and Eddie to get back rather than move your things. You like Jeff most out of everyone. With the whole group collected you know he won't drag you into conversation. 

"She's a bit… much," Gareth's saying.

"How can she be a bit much? She doesn't say a lot," Maggie says. 

You frown. You're the only other she. 

"Not like that, just– the touching and stuff. She's always grabbing onto him like a toddler. I don't think I could stand it." 

"You don't have to stand it," Jeff says. "She's Eddie's girl." 

"Clearly." 

"Gareth, when was the last time you got laid?" Maggie asks, flicking a hair tie at him, to his annoyance. "You're being bitter. They fucking love each other, man, it's nice." 

"It is a little tiny bit too much sometimes," Jamison says.

You wince. You know it's a matter of seconds before one of them turns to see you standing there. Is it worse to turn around or to approach? 

You walk up to the table just as Gareth says, "Yes! Thank you man, she's too–" 

He cuts off when he sees you with a cough.

"Who?" you ask, full well knowing it's you. Honestly, you're shy but you still get mad, you kind of want him to own up and say it while you're there, and at the same time you're hoping against hope they'll lie. 

Thankfully, they pretend it was about someone else. 

"Nobody," Maggie says. 

"Some girl at the library," Jamison says. 

You lean past Jeff with as sunny an apology as you can manage to grab the pen from your jacket. "Eddie," you say by way of explanation, holding the pen up with a shrug. 

You walk away quicker than you should. It's obvious you've overheard. There's a thump and a, "Nice fucking job, loser." 

Eddie's deep in conversation as you offer the pen. He takes it without stopping, but he makes sure he kisses your cheek. 

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom, okay?" you say. 

"I'll be right there, sweetheart." 

To get to the bathroom you have to walk past the booth again. With the hurt feeling pounding between your ears and what you suspect might be all eyes on you, you make for one of the two doors. The summer sun and the dry Hawkins heat hits you immediately, a second layering of smothering to wrap around the first. You walk around a rainbow chalk hopscotch and into the shade of the smoking shelter, hands at your collar, breathing hard. 

Don't cry, you think firmly. Don't cry. They'll know if you do and that's twice as embarrassing as walking out. Imagine how embarrassed Eddie will feel if you cause a scene.  

You sit on the little perch in the shelter and stare at the floor. There's nowhere to look that isn't stingingly bright, the sun in the white-blue sky glaring down on you and the sidewalk bleached a blinding ivory. You close your eyes against it. Your shoulders hunch in protectively. Your hands find their way to your face. 

Like a toddler, Gareth said. You press your fingertips into your eyes, fighting against the ache. Is that true? Are you childish in how much you rely on Eddie? You take his hand and his arm, you catch onto his clothes when you're worried, you step behind him when you're overwhelmed. 

"Shit," you whisper. 

The breeze washing over you does little to cool you down. You must sit there for a handful of minutes, worried and nauseous. 

"Hey," Eddie says gently. You flinch despite his best efforts not to startle you. 

He looks tall outlined by the sun. 

"You okay?" he asks. 

"I just wanted some fresh air," you say. 

He raises his brows slightly. "That why Gareth just apologised to me?" 

You wince as he sits down. All of you wants to sag into his side, but a small voice tells you not to. You stay ramrod straight, hands pressed flat and clammy to your knees. 

Eddie gives your elbow a rub. His thumb digs into soft skin and the harder suggestion of cartilage and bone before sliding up. He uses touch often to convey silent reassurement. This seems to say, I don't know what happened, but I'm here. 

"I'm fine. We can go back inside," you say, attempting to fool him. 

"There's no rush." His voice tips to a low, rough register. He's keyed in to your upset, no doubt about it. "It's a nice day, babe." 

He gives you a minute. The small feathering of clouds skirts one edge of the horizon to the other, the shadow of the diner stretching tall as the sun lazes down. You push the worst of your feelings from your mind. It's easy to do with such an unshakeable support at your side, his fingers curling down to your forearm, vying for a hand to hold. 

"I heard your friends talking about me. It wasn't all nice," you confess. 

"Assholes." 

You glance at his face. He has a crease between his brows. 

"Well, mostly Gareth. He said that I… act like a kid. A toddler, that I'm too much, at least for him to stand. And don't get me wrong, Eds, I'm not thrilled that they were talking about me, but I guess I…" You take a short breath and look away from him. "I hate that it's true." 

"You can be mad when people talk shit. I'm mad," he says. "He said you're like a toddler?" He shuffles closer to you on the bench. "Babe, it's not true, okay? You're not too much. Fuck, we're here to hang out and they can't wait ten minutes to run their mouths–" 

"It wasn't like that, it was just Gareth." Gareth's always been the selfish friend. 

"He doesn't get a pass for saying something shitty 'cos he's always shitty. I brought you here," —you peek at him, recognising upset in his tone even when it's the barest inkling— "knowing you didn't really want to come because you get so nervous," —he sounds pained for you— "I fucking told him to leave you alone. I said we wouldn't come around if he didn't stop being a mood killer." 

You worry at your bottom lip. "Maybe that's kind of his point, Eds. You have to look out for me. You had to ask someone to be nice to me 'cos I can't handle it–" 

"You don't have to handle it. The people around you should be nice to you. This isn't high school, you don't have to put up with it, and I told him that." Eddie grabs your arm with the hand that isn't tangled in yours and turns you to face him. "I'm sorry," he says, almost a murmur, "I didn't invite you today to have you humiliated." 

You're feeling a little mortified by the passion of his feelings. He's mad at the wrong person, isn't he? "Why are you sorry? I'm the one who clings to you." 

"I want you to." Eddie holds your eyes, brown and big and imploring you to listen, the starts of his brows sewing together. "I'm sorry because it's not fair. And because Gareth was a dick to you. And for getting mad." He smiles at you ruefully. "I'm being a dick, too." 

"In what world?" 

Eddie leans in slowly, giving you enough time to close your eyes as his nose bumps into yours, encouraging your head up to allow for a kiss. He kisses twice, a third time, pulling away to rub your bottom lip. 

"Are you really upset?" he asks softly. 

You know whatever answer you give him is one he's okay with. 

"I feel so embarrassed," you say. "They knew that I overheard them. Now I feel like I'll be constantly worried about how much I'm touching you." 

"Well, that's their problem. That doesn't say shit about you," Eddie says, wrinkling his nose. 

"I'm really not too much?" you ask. He can likely hear how desperate you are for a kind answer, your throat burning with the effort it takes to stave off tears. 

"You've never been too much. I'm the too-much one. You wouldn't even hold my hand when we first started dating, you remember that? We'd go to the movies and you'd get so flustered when I bought your ticket." Eddie's arms wrap around your waist, the breeze ruffling his sweet curls and sending gusts of his smell your way. You're a goner, dropping your face into his shoulder. "Do you remember that?" he asks again, his face slipping down to yours as he hugs you close. "The first time we went to the Hawk together, I went first, and I don't know why you thought you'd have to buy your own ticket but you got all quiet when I got yours, too. I loved that. You know what I loved even more than that?" 

You smile, knowing he's going to say something lovely. "What?" you ask. 

"I loved how proud you were to sit down with me. You wouldn't hold my hand but you'd put your cheek on my shoulder just like this." 

Eddie rubs the tip of his nose against your temple. "I love how much you want to be near me," he says. "It's not childish, is it? If being closer to me makes you feel better, there's nothing wrong with that. Gareth's just jealous 'cos he isn't getting laid." 

"That's what Maggie said." You laugh. 

"Maggie's a good one. She makes Gareth bearable, kind of." 

You feel the stretch of his back under your hands. Your head is pounding from the sudden rush of big emotions, your tongue dry and throat aching, but you don't have a lick of urgency to get up and go back in. 

"He's such a dick," you whisper. 

Eddie laughs, patting your back. "Such a fucking dick." 

"I can't help being a loser and wanting to hug you so much," you say. You're joking now, but it's true all the same. 

"I tempt the untemptable," he says agreeably.

You laugh and lift up a bit to hug him harder, your face pressing into his neck. 

"You're not a loser," he says more seriously. "You know that, right? What Gareth said, it's not okay, but there's no accounting for idiocy." Eddie sits back on the bench, taking your forearms into his hands for some more soft massaging. "He can think whatever he likes, I'm not the government, but he was wrong, and also it's rude and, again, super shitty of him to do that here. So with your blessing I'm gonna punch him in the face." 

"Nooooo," you murmur. 

"Very soft no. Taking it for a yes."

"Eddie, you can't hit Gareth."

"He should watch his mouth, then." 

You reach up for a second hug. You love that he prioritised how you felt, as well as how eager he is to stick up for you —how mad he is on your behalf. 

"He's trying to take this away from me," Eddie says, leaning back under your weight, arms crossing behind your spine. He looks up at you like you've stolen his breath, lips parted and teeth peeking out with his smile. 

"Do you really want to punch him?" you ask. You sound very fond.

"I hate that he made you feel bad about yourself. And he irritates me." 

"But…" 

Eddie hums like he's thinking for a moment. "No, I definitely still want to hit him." 

You tuck a curl away from his cheek tenderly. "Thanks for wanting to defend my honour, Eds," you say.

"I'm on your side through everything." He looks ridiculously pretty saying such a ridiculously lovely thing. "That's how we work, right? You're on my side too?" 

Your face flushes with heat. "Of course I am, baby." 

"Good. Unrelated to our previous conversation, how much money do you have, roughly? In case I need financial aid in the coming days." He drops his voice to a whisper, "How much even is bail lately?" 

You cup his cheek. "We can't afford it," you whisper back. 

"Typical." 

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

thank you for reading!♡

[boba-beom]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ late nights, city lights | CHOI YEONJUN

⟢ neighbour!yeonjun x gn!reader

⟢ drabble; comfort, fluff

⟢ after a long day of unpacking, you thank your neighbour for suggesting you take a break while he introduces you to the city you're about to call home.

⟢ wc: 999

⟢ warnings: reader already has a lil crush, a little collision, yeonjun perhaps takes an interest in reader; interpret that as you will :>

⟢ a\n: requested by @blackhairedjjun <3 added details! 'reader just moved to the city on their own & is nervous and excited at the same time about starting their life over there, yeonjun as the cute next-door neighbor at their apartment who the reader hits it off with' I was so excited to write this because I already had some thoughts floating in my head from the prompt :> I had fun writing this one, I hope you like it!

the last cardboard box was finally emptied, only setting aside the contents of it to organise later on, before flattening out the box and shoving it on the pile by the front door. you managed to wake up incredibly early to unpack everything, so all you had left to do was organise things in the next few days before being able to settle in fully.

moving out was hard. but you finally moved out and it was something you had been wanting to do for the longest time now. you had your new job to thank as well as your friends who suggested you take this new chapter in life, hoping to start afresh.

you let out a tired sigh looking at all the flattened boxes you're still yet to dispose of, but just thinking about the trips you'll have to make coming up and down the apartment complex seemed to burden you already. but you're gonna have to get moving since it's already late in the night.

you shove as much flattened boxes into one that's still open, opening your door and picking up the box only to drop it after colliding with what seems to be one of your neighbours. great. you scold yourself before checking on your neighbour to apologise.

"oh gosh I'm so ... sorry." your voice trails quietly when you see a guy of a tall and lean build, long hair and taking off his headphones to hang from his neck before scurrying to help with the cardboard that fell out.

he chuckles, and you nervously laugh with him.

"long day?" he asks and you simply nod, gathering the boxes and holding onto them instead of giving them back to you. he saw the rest of the boxes by your door, and ultimately you pick up on his intentions. "I'll help you with these."

"oh this is embarrassing, the first time I see a neighbour and you're already doing something for me." you worry but you're still thankful all the while.

"don't worry, honestly, it's not a problem. it's about time I met the new neighbour." he says simply, letting out a pretty smile that's just as contagious as his laugh. "I'm yeonjun by the way, my flat's just on your right."

you give him your name and mentally take note of his flat number to make sure you greet him whenever you bump into each other. "again, sorry for stumbling into you, I haven't left the apartment since I got here."

he notices your timid smile and a thought crosses his mind.

"how about you grab a jacket and after we throw these out I'll show you around the city nearby." he suggests, raising his brows in anticipation of your answer.

of course, it doesn't take much convincing since you hadn't had time to explore yet.

"wait, really?" you watch him nod in your direction with full enthusiasm and it just makes it easier for you to feel at ease.

surprisingly, you realised you'd probably knock on his door one way or another to ask where to throw out the boxes, forgetting where to throw them out, but this was a lot easier and less daunting than having to knock on a door late into the night.

yeonjun was truly one of the most down to earth people you've ever met in a long time. his calm nature of making you feel welcome to the city, him walking on the pavement closest to the road while you both walk and converse down the quiet streets of the city.

the lights were bright as ever, thinking that it'd be busy at this time of night until yeonjun told you about which days are usually roaring at night and which ones are a little quieter.

surprisingly, your new neighbour took you to one of the 24/7 convenient stores nearby for some ice-cream. the nights were getting warmer and the jacket was just a precaution. it was becoming hoodie season and it had you observing yeonjun's outfit; an oversized graphic hoodie with wide leg denim shorts that looked like a long skirt. his style was appealing for what counts as 'casual' clothing. you even took a candid picture of him while he was looking up where else he should take you at this time of night.

then within an hour of wandering around, yeonjun took you back to the apartment complex and onto the rooftop where you were able to see the skyscrapers and occasional lights from vehicles beelining their way around the city.

"so, what do you think so far?" yeonjun's voice was a little hoarse, the both of you gazing over the pretty lights below.

your lips turn into a tight-lipped smile, pondering on your first few thoughts about your first night wandering around, even if it was spontaneous and only for an hour.

"I could get used to this." you lean your elbows on the ledge, smiling to yourself.

you were proud of yourself for finally doing what you've been longing to do, even after some people doubted you before. it didn't stop you when you had the right support system to encourage you every step of the way. and now you have yeonjun too.

said male turns his head towards you, a gentle smile crawling on his lips while he scans the relief beaming on your face.

"I can always show you around again." he suggests, "like we can explore during the day. but I don't mind wandering around at night again."

you hum in agreement. there was something so soothing about being in his presence, but also comforting knowing that he was already so open to helping you settle into this new part of your life.

"thank you, yeonjun. I really appreciate this." you turn to look at him too, eyes locking a little longer than you have the past hour. you have a good feeling that this friendship will be a good one.

this is gonna be a good one.

© BOBA-BEOM ; all rights reserved. do not repost, copy, alter or translate in any way or platform.

[icequeenlila]

Context: they are driving in a convertible (Max is driving), Bradley lowkey has an existentional crisis right before this scene, and Max snapps him out of it without even realizing.

"Powerline!"

Max voice was loud and excited and all consuming.

Suddenly loud music blasted from the speakers, shutting down every thought Bradley could have possibly had, ripping his attention away from himself and his thoughts, until there was only Max and his loud, goofy voice, singing (shrieking) along to some random song.

Bradley blinked against the whiplash. It was like being thrown into cold water. Disorienting but refreshing.

"Open up your eyes, take a look at me. Get the picture fixed in your memory", Max sang along, his eyes leaving the road for one short moment, brows wiggling at Bradley.

His mind was still trying to sort out itself, so all Bradley could do was to look at the boy with wide eyes, not even able to frown or complain about Max being an irresponsible driver.

Bradley kept staring, watching Max thrust his head back and forth, the boy's eyes concentrated on the road, not missing a single word of the lyrics.

"Some people settle for the typical thing. Livin' all their lives waitin' in the wings."

Wide, green fields passed by them, the sun standing high, shining down hot on them. At some point Max had put on sunglasses. His sunglasses! And Bradley was only noticing now.

"You gotta believe that I got what it takes!" Max's voice was peeking and breaking in a way that should have been embarrassing but the boy didn't care at all.

"To stand out! Above the crowd! Even if I gotta shout out loud!"

He turned to look at Bradley, nodding his head so the Gucci glasses slid down his nose a nudge, reaching out a hand towards him and balling it into a fist as he kept shouting the lyrics.

"Till mine is the only face you see! Gonna stand out..." He pointed a finger at Bradley. "’till you notice me."

Heat to Bradley's cheeks, ears burning and heart picking up a beat. Because of what? Because of a crappy song and piercing dark eyes?

Why did he think of Max' eyes as piercing? Why was he thinking about them at all?

The answer made him angry, and anger was a way better feeling than whatever he had going on only moments ago.

Bradley finally found his voice again.

"What the fuck, Goof!?", he shouted over the music, wind almost swallowing his voice. "Focus on the road! Put down my glasses! Do you call that singing!?"

Max didn't follow any of his commands, his voice now filled with laughter as he kept singing along to the lyrics, not missing a single beat.

"If the squeaky wheel's always gettin' the grease. I'm totally devoted to disturbing the peace."

Max was totally ignoring him, head nodding up and down as he kept driving, the car not swaying once.

"And I'll do it all again when I get it done. Until I become your number one!"

"Don't you ignore me!", Bradly shouted, but the glare on his face was wavering.

Max just kept half singing, half shouting the lyrics at him. The more Bradley complained the more Max struggled to keep his voice even, as laughter shook his entire body.

All the while, wind was tugging at them from all sides, blowing their hair in and out of their faces.

In his euphoria, Max was half performing to the song, nodding his head, shimmying his shoulders and pointing fingers at Bradley, trying to make him part of his ridiculous performance.

"I'm under a spell, I'm in over my head."

Max kept wiggling his brows at him and it looked so ridiculous that Bradley actually had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning.

"And you know I'm goin' all of the way till the end- Get ready, Brad!"

Max drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, leaning slightly forward in anticipation.

"Pfft!"

Bradley shook his head, trying his hardest to keep from grinning. Seeing Max in such high spirits did something to him. His chest felt wider, his breathing easier. He stopped clenching his jaw and straining his shoulders.

"To stand out above the crowd! Even if I gotta shout out loud!"

Max was singing at the top of his lungs now, hair blowing in the wind, Gucci glasses lopsided on his nose.

"Till mine is the only face you'll see! Gonna stand out till you notice me, yeah!"

And Bradley couldn't keep in the laughter anymore. He let himself fall back against his seat, arms crossed over his stomach, as he just let go.

It was ridiculous. He'd been pretty much questioning his entire life mere moments ago and now he was crying from laughter. He was crying for god's sake!

And all just because Max was singing along to a song, not caring if he was hitting the right notes, goofing off and making a complete idiot of himself.

This was a new low. But he really didn't care.

"Oh my god", Max' voice sounded next to him. He had stopped singing. "Is he laughing?"

Bradley turned to look at him and his vision was swimming. It made him laugh even harder, because it was so stupid.

"Do you need a hospital?", Max asked, stupid grin on his face, eyes jumping between Bradley and the road. "Are you feeling all right?"

Bradley wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to compose himself and failing.

"What?"

"This is the first time I hear you laughing without any murderous intent in your voice", Max said.

Bradley shook his head, not able to stop smiling.

"You're an idiot", he said, and he sounded horribly out of breath.

"But I made you laugh." Max shot him a satisfied grin. "I knew you would warm up to me."

"I'm just laughing at you", Bradley argued, but there was no malice in it.

He managed to stop laughing but his voice was still breathy. His belly hurt. His guts feeling tingly.

"Just admit that you like me." Max nudged him against the shoulder, eyes staying on the road.

"You're an idiot, Goof", Bradley said, swatting at his hand.

"Max."

"Huh?"

"Call me Max. I like it when you say my name."

No, Bradley didn't blush at that. It was totally the summer heat. And only that!

"I will call you by your name as soon as you manage to remember mine correctly", he retorted.

"Goof it is then."

Bradley giggled. He couldn't help it. He felt too good to care.

"You're an idiot, Goof."

"You already said that", Max glanced over at him briefly. "Also, you're a snob."

Bradley blinked, sitting up straight in his seat. "Excuse me? I'm not a snob."

"The snobbiest snob I've ever encountered", Max said, chuckle in his voice and grin on his lips.

"Take it back!"

"No can do."

"Goof!", Bradley warned, but his voice betrayed him as it trembled with suppressed laughter.

"Brad." The grin on Max' lips seemed to be glued on.

"Stop calling me Brad!"

"Admit you like me."

"I don't."

"But I like you, Bradley."

And Max' voice was soft when he said it.

His breathing stopped. For a few moments, Bradley couldn't do anything but stare at the boy.

How was he so bold? So carefree? So completely and brutally honest?

Heat spread from his chest and traveled higher. And this time it definitely wasn't the sun.

Max' eyes were constantly jumping between him and the road, searching Bradley's face, waiting for him to say something in return.

But Bradley couldn't. Not when he felt his heartbeat in his throat. Not when his tongue felt dry as the desert, his entire body burning with a tingly heat.

"Look at that", Max said, and at some point, he must have turned down the volume of the radio, because his voice was soft. Gentle. "Bradley has lost his words."

And somehow, Max sounded almost fond. The look in his eyes, the curve of his lips. It seemed all so honest and genuine, and impossible.

It made Bradley's gut clench in a half tingly, half painful way. It felt good, but it hurt. It was confusing, because Max was confusing him. Bradley was confusing himself. Whatever!

It was definitely too much to feel at once, and he needed Max to stop looking at him like that.

"Eyes on the road", he said, his voice way too breathy, way too soft.

"But I like looking at you more", Max said, not missing a beat.

And Bradley's heart was fucking pounding against his rib cage, like it wanted to jump out of his chest and right into Max' arms.

He could not have that!

He reached out his hand, placing his fingers gently against Max' jaw, forcing him to look forward.

"On the road", he repeated, voice slightly trembling towards the end.

Because there was the faintest scruff of beard stubble beneath his fingertips. Max' skin felt warm, the line of his jaw firm. Bradley withdrew his hand.

And his heart was beating, beating, beating quickly inside his chest.

"Also stop at the next store we pass", he added, forcing himself to breathe evenly.

This couldn't be happening. This so couldn't be happening.

Max grinned, keeping his eyes on the road like Bradley had told him to.

"As you wish, Brad."

And Bradley didn't have the breath to argue on the nickname, too occupied to keep his stomach from clenching, his fingers from fidgeting.

This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be possibly happening.

He looked back at Max and his stomach felt tingly. He looked at him and there was heat everywhere. His heart was ready to explode.

It couldn't be. It couldn't be. He couldn't have a crush on Max.

+

This is from chapter 4 of my fic Good Luck, Babe! on ao3

[callsign-dexter]

Blood Ties, Broken Bonds

Request: Hi !!!!

Could I ask for a Connor Rhodes imagine where the reader is his sister but they haven't had much contact as his ass of a dad kept you away from him, but you secretly always wanted to be near Connor. One time she gets delivered in the ED after a bad car accident you had and Connor is furious as he finds out that this just happened after another fight between you and your dad. You're out for a while and your Dad acts all innocent and wants to visit you but Connor doesn't even let him near you. After you woke up, you tell Connor that you don't wanna be away from him anymore and that you want your brother back, which he more than agrees to and he's just all happy and taking care of you :)

Pairings: Connor Rhodes x Sister!Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, inaccurate medical talk, car crash, mentions and acts of abuse (mental, physical, and verbal) done by father, blood, broken bones

Masterlist

If it were up to you, you would have rather been raised by your brother, Connor Rhodes, when he turned 18 and left but that was not the case. Growing up you had a wonderful relationship with your brother, a bond that you couldn't break but when he left your father, Cornelius Rhodes, cut your contact with him to the minimum. So minimum that you only got one phone call and that was on your father's terms. The both of you hated it. Connor didn't come back until you were 14 years old and even though he was back it was still minimum contact. You eventually got another phone that Connor paid for and you could talk to him that way but you had to be sneaky, most of your friends, Connor, and Claire had the number of this phone. 

Your father was not a good man despite how he acted out in public. Behind the scenes he was abusive verbally, physically, and mentally. It was so bad that you refused to have what little friends you had over. If you think him cutting contact with your brother was bad, well he did it with your friends. If you went out with your friends he wanted to know where you were every hour on the hour and if you were a second late then you were getting in trouble. 

Fights in the household were not uncommon. It could have been over the simplest things like what to watch on TV and he always won. Multiple times you had stormed out of the house and driven until you were at your sister's, Claire Rhodes, house. You couldn't go to Connor because your father had put a tracking device on your car so he knew where you were going. If it was not a set destination then he would be calling and yelling at you, one time he called the police saying you stole the vehicle because you weren't at one of the set places. Thankfully you were able to get out of it when you told them it was your car and you had proof, and yes you had to buy your own car.

When your dad went out of town on the rare occasion, he actually let you stay with Connor which was a surprise to you and himself but you didn't argue. When you stayed with him, he got to see how bad it was at home. This is because all the things that your dad drilled into your head came out when visiting him and oh man it angered him so much. Connor has even gotten into fights with your dad but it just made things worse and even less contact with your big brother. Your dad tended to be forgetful that you were even there, so forgetful that sometimes you had to fend for yourself for food or not eat at all. He never bought food for you, you had to buy everything for yourself.

Your father had been just getting ready to leave for the week which means you could spend that week with your brother, finally. You had texted with the phone that Connor had gotten for you at the beginning of the week excited that you got to see him. 

Dad's gonna be gone for a week. Do you mind if I stay with you?

Big Bro: Not at all! Come over to my place after school. I'll be home.

Ok. I'm going to stop at home first for clothes and then the store and grab food.

Big Bro: No need. I got plenty of food at the house. You're welcome to it anytime.

Oh ok. Thank you.

Big Bro: No need to thank me. Does dad make you buy your own food?

Yea. Even if I buy it, he eats it. I love you, Big Bro.

Big Bro: I love you too, Sis. 

This made Connor see red. “That bastard.” Connor said aloud in the break room and Will Halstead just happened to be in there.

“What's up?” Will asked looking up from some files. Will had quickly become one of your favorites in the hospital, he was just fun to be around and was so funny. Also, the fact that he got on your brother's nerves from time to time was fun. You liked doing that but then again that's what little sisters are supposed to do.

“Apparently dad makes Y/N buy her own food for herself but still eats it. 

“Are you for real?” Will asked, now paying full attention to Connor. Connor nodded.

“Yup, he made her buy her own car and hardly let her talk to me. If she does it's very limited. He has such a grudge against me he's making her pay for it too by not seeing me.” He said 

“He's an ass. Didn't you buy her a phone?” Will asked and Connor nodded.

“Yup but even with that contact is still limited.” Connor said

“Have you thought of getting custody of her?” Will asked 

“Many many times but I know it'll be shot down. I can't prove anything. He's too powerful. He has a steady job and income coming in.” Connor said going to the fridge and grabbing a snack.

“You have a steady job and income coming in.” Will said

“I know. It's bad over there Will. He's mentally, physically, and verbally abusing her. I've been with her when he calls and he just cusses her out and degrades her. I can't prove anything. She's never come to the hospital for it so can't go off that. He has cop friends as well so I can't report that and she can't either.” Connor told his now best friend; it was rocky at first but they got over it. 

“I have a cop brother and you know he loves Y/N. Hell, all of Intelligence does, including Trudy. That would help major time. They would believe her more than your dad.” Will said getting up and walking over to grab something to eat out of the cabinet and then turned to look at Connor while leaning on the counter. Connor turned to look at him.

“True. Would that be enough?” He asked and Will shrugged.

“Maybe. She's been here multiple times to see you and everyone here loves her. They've seen the bruises and her wince in pain several times, I know I have. She doesn't do it in front of you or when she thinks anybody is looking. Dr. Charles has seen it and you know he would be the best to help you win that case. She's scared to say anything to you because she's afraid to tell anyone then he'll find out and punish her.” Will said and Connor was silent. It saddened him that you couldn't go to him, your big brother, because you were scared that if you told him then your father would find out and punish you. 

“How do you know that?” Connor asked

“She was in here a few days ago looking for you but you were in surgery. She told me after I called her out for wincing. I haven't told you because we've been so busy.” Will said. Connor wasn't mad at him; he knew they'd been busy. Connor was about to start talking when commotion in the ED grabbed their attention and they both ran out there to see Gabriela Dawson and Sylvie Brett roll through the doors pushing a gurney with Maggie Lockwood shouting and giving orders. She just happened to look up and see Connor and she gave him a look of pity. He knew that look, he looked over and saw you lying there and his heart sank. She looked at Will and they seemed to understand each other as Will grabbed Connor by the shoulders and began to drag him away. 

“Will!” Connor shouted but he ignored him. 

“Stay here. I'm going to go help.” He said and Connor nodded but Will knew he wouldn't stay put but at least he tried. Will took off and jumped right in. Connor waited maybe not even 5 seconds before he was barreling his way into chaos. He grabbed Gabriela Dawson and Sylvie Brett as they passed.

“What happened?” He asked 

“We were called to a car crash, your sister's, it looked like she was driving way too fast and hit a patch of black ice. The car flipped several times and then hit a pole. It also looked like someone rammed into it and pushed it down the hill, there wasn't another car there when we arrived it looked like a hit and run. It must've crashed through the ice and into the freezing water because that is where we found her. Her lips were blue and she was very hypothermic and her heart rate was super slow but we got everything under control and got her warmed up.” Sylvie said, not wanting to tell him that it was your dad that rammed your car until further evidence, as Connor's face drained of color. 

“She was unresponsive when we got there but she quickly woke up. When asked why she was driving fast, she said that she had just had a fight with your guy's dad. She also has bruises in the form of handprints around her throat like she was being choked and he slammed her head against the wall. We lost her once and had to do CPR but we got her back.” Gabriela added 

“Fucking hell. I'll fucking kill that son of a bitch.” He said and then looked at the two girls. “Thank you for responding to her. She wouldn't want anyone else.” He said and they smiled and nodded.

“We love that kid.” Gabriela said “The whole firehouse does.” She added and that made him smile. “We gotta go.” She said and he nodded.

“Thank you again.” He said 

“Not a problem.” They said and they were out the door and he turned back to your room in time to see you being taken to surgery. He saw Dr. Crockett Marcel leading the way, he then stopped Will.

“What's going on?” Connor asked

“She has some internal bleeding that needs to be taken care of and a broken arm. She also has some broken ribs from the seat belt and they are doing CPR on her.” He said. Connor just stood still as Will and Crockett rushed you off. He wanted to know what happened. He wanted to know now.

—-----------

You were happy. Your dad was leaving for a week and that meant you could actually spend time with your big brother that you loved oh so much. You had the biggest smile on your face as you drove home towards school to grab some clothing and then off to Connor's place. As you pulled up into the driveway you were surprised to see your dad's car parked in the driveway, ice ran through your veins. He was supposed to be gone. You parked your car in the driveway next to your dad's and got out after turning the car off and hesitantly walked inside. Once inside your eyes locked on your dad's “What are you doing here? You were supposed to be gone.” You said.

“Change of plans. I'm going tomorrow.” He said casually.

“But I was supposed to go to Connor's after I grabbed some clothes.” You said and when you said his name his face darkened.

“You're not going. It's final.” He said a little more aggressively.

“No, I'm going. This was the plan.” You said standing up for yourself but that seemed to be a mistake because now you were slammed up against the wall. Your dad holding the collar of your shirt. You were in shock. The breath had been knocked out of you.

“You are not going and that is final.” He growled out. His eyes were hardened and you started to tremble. 

“You can't do this. You promised when you're away I can stay with him.” You said his hand went to your throat and started to squeeze it, cutting the air supply off. 

“Well, I'm not leaving now. So, cancel it.” He said and slammed your head against the wall and stars appeared. 

“No, I won't. I'm going to stay with him.” You said barely getting the words out. He growled and released your throat and you coughed and took deep breaths in. 

“You will not see him ever again. You won't talk to him ever again. That's final.” He said, “Give me your phone.” He said and you gave him the one he got for you and you watched him grab it and take it over to the counter. He threw it there and grabbed a hammer from the drawer and smashed it. Tears streamed down your face, thankfully you still had Connor's phone that he had given you in your car.

“That's my phone!” You cried out. “How else am I supposed to let you know where I'm atm?” You asked.

“Easy. You stay home 24/7. You homeschool. You will also come to conferences and such with me.” He said walking over to you 

“No! I won't!” You yelled and shoved him and he stumbled back.

“Yes, you will! You're my daughter and you will do what I say!” He roared out. 

“No! I wish you weren't my dad!” You yelled 

“Yea? Well, I wish you were never born! You're just a whore like your mother. Maybe you should end up like her!” He yelled back and what he said made you freeze and grow wide eyed. 

“I hate you! I wish Connor was my guardian!” You yelled 

“Maybe he should be. It would get you off my hands. Then I could bring anybody I want to fuck and not have you here.” He said 

“You already do that.” You said “It doesn't matter. I'm leaving.” You said and started to storm out but he was quicker and grabbed the back of your hoodie and pulled back choking you again slamming you down on the ground. He flipped you over and you started to fight as he startled you and wrapped his hands around your throat. You found strength you didn't know you had and pushed him off of you. You were quick to scramble to get up and out the door grabbing your keys. You got to your car and quickly got in and tore out of there through the lawn not bothering to back up. Grass and snow were thrown but you didn't care. You got onto the main road and took off. Tears streaked down your face, the events playing through your mind. You don't know how fast you were going but all of a sudden you were spinning out of control, black ice you had just hit black ice. 

Your world was now spinning. You tried to control it but that just caused the car to flip, flip at least 6 times. Luckily it landed up right but then you slid into a pole crushing the passenger side. When it finally came to a stop you could breathe but then a car was barreling at you. You saw the headlights and squinted but you had no time to react because it was slamming into you hard enough to throw you to the side and further onto the pole snapping it in half. It just happened to be an electric wooden pole and that sent lines flying and electric flying. You barely got a glance of the car as he drove off. What you saw made you cry; it was your father's car he was trying to kill you. As your car rolled down the hill and threw you around and knocked your head every which way your thoughts went to your big brother. You wanted Connor. You wanted to be safe in his arms watching some cheesy stupid medical show and him making fun of it. You wanted his food. You thought about how you wanted him as your car broke through ice and plunged into the chilly water and your world went black as your head hit the steering wheel.

—-----------

Firehouse 51 was actually for once after a stressful call they had come back from. They probably were able to relax for a good 4 hours before the alarms were going off once again. 

“Engine 51, Truck 81, Rescue Squad 3, Ambulance 61. Hit and run. Car in water. Location: Ellington Way.” 

Everyone geared up and started their way to the location. “This does not sound good. We need to get Intelligence involved.” Kelly Severide said over the radio to Chief Wallace Boden. 

“I agree. I'll get on it.” He said as everyone pulled up to the scene. They could see the skid and slide marks. Soon Boden was giving orders and Kelly was going into the water. 

“Fuck, I know this car.” He said through his mic.

“Whose is it?” Boden asked

“Y/N Rhodes.” Kelly replied. “Alright, Kid. Let's get you out of here.” He said to himself and started to carefully. It took some time but he was pulling you out and surfacing the top. Everyone worked together to get you out and onto a gurney as Intelligence pulled up. You started to slowly rouse when they started to put heat and a blanket on you. “Hey there, Baby Rhodes.” Kelly said as Sylvie and Gabriela started to work on you. 

“He tried to kill me.” You mumbled

“Jay!” He yelled out at Jay Halstead and he walked over “What was that, Kid?” Kelly asked wanting someone else to hear what he was hearing.

“Dad, tried to kill me. He crashed into my car after I wrecked.” You said and then started to fall back to sleep.

“Alright, we’ll look into it.” Jay said and then he nodded “Why were you driving so fast?” Jay asked.

“I had a fight with Dad. I had to get away.” You said and he nodded and then looked at the two girls and they were quickly loading you up and before you knew it you were speeding down the street towards Med, towards your brother. As you were racing towards Med Gabriela started her assessment

“Lips are blue and she is still cold to the touch.” She said and then slid a thermometer into your ear and it quickly beeped. “Temp is 95 F.” She added and then grabbed her stethoscope and put it to your chest “Heart rate is slow. Starting warm fluids.” She finished and started to do as she said. Suddenly you started to flatline “Shit, she is coding! Starting CPR!” She shouted and she did so.

“We are 3 minutes out!” Sylvie said and then your heart started again. “How are we back there?” She asked.

“Got her back.” She said and sighing. Finally, you arrived at Med and were quickly rushed in and they quickly got you in a bay. Marcel was quick to jump in and so was Will. “Y/N Rhodes, Female, 16 years old. Spun out on black ice, hit a pole, was rammed by another car and pushed it down the bank and into a frozen lake. Hypothermic but started the warming process on the way here, started warm fluids, she flatlined once and had to do CPR but got her back pretty quick. She has bruises in the form of handprints around her throat like she was being choked and he slammed her head against the wall.” Gabriela said and he nodded and as they finished transferring you to a bed. The two girls left and now everyone was working on you. 

“Continue the warming process.” He said and looked up at the monitor “Temperature is coming up. I want to get x-rays here.” He said and one was brought in.

“We also need an ultrasound.” Will said as noticed the bruising around your stomach.

“What do you see?” Marcel asked 

“Bruising on her stomach and it is discolored.” He said and then touched it “It’s also warm and soft.” He said and Marcel nodded as an ultrasound was brought in and done and it was confirmed that there was internal bleeding. “We need to get her into surgery now.” Will said.

“She also has a broken arm that needs to be set and broken ribs. We need to go now.” He confirmed and so they started to do so. As they were moving you Connor grabbed Will.

“What the hell is going on?” He asked 

“She has some internal bleeding that needs to be taken care of and a broken arm. She also has some broken ribs from the seat belt and they are doing CPR on her.” Will said “We got to go.” He said and Connor nodded and they set off. 

—-----------

As he was waiting nervously, he noticed Jay and Hailey Upton walk in and wasn’t concerned but then he walked up to Connor and now he was confused. “What’s up?” Connor asked.

“I have some news on Y/N’s crash.” Jay said and Connor nodded and led him to the doctor’s lounge. 

“So?” Connor asked

“There were cameras where she crashed and we found something that you’re not going to like. After Y/N crashed into the pole a car came and crashed into her side and made it roll down the hill and into a frozen lake.” Jay said and Connor nodded.

“Sylvie and Gabriela told me that part.” Connor said

“The car that crashed into hers was your dad’s.” Hailey said and Connor was speechless. 

“We have a warrant out for his arrest for attempted murder. We also got a judge to sign immediate custody papers for you to be her sole and legal guardian.” Jay said and Connor looked at him speechless. 

“Wait. Really?” Connor asked and Jay nodded.

“Really. How is she?” Jay asked

“Still in surgery but Will and Marcel have high hopes of good recovery.” Connor said and Jay smiled and nodded. Will came in and saw Connor.

“Hey, Jay and Hailey. Connor, she’s out of surgery and in a room, you can see her. Room 246. Chart is at the end of bed.” Will said and Connor nodded.

“Thank you.” He said and then he, Jay, and Hailey headed to your room as Will’s pager beeped and had to leave. They walked to the room and Connor was in tears and walked in as the other two stayed outside.

“Oh, Y/N/N. I’m so sorry. I won’t let anything bad happen to you again.” He said and bent down to kiss your forehead. He looked up when heard some commotion and saw the one person he didn’t want to see, your guys’ father. He looked down at you seeing that you were still asleep and kissed your forehead one more time and walked angrily outside. “What the hell are you doing here?” He asked.

“What do you mean? I’m here for my daughter. I told her not to go out driving but she didn’t listen to me.” He said and Connor saw red “How is she?” He asked. 

“You tried to kill her.” Connor said 

“That is not true.” He said

“Actually yes, it is. We have it on camera. Cornelius Rhodes you are under arrest for the attempted murder of your daughter, Y/N Rhodes, immediate custody and sole guardianship is to go to Connor Rhodes.” Jay said as he started to put cuffs on him.

“I did no such thing.” Cornelius said 

“Yes, you did. Jay, please arrest him.” Connor pleaded and Jay nodded and grabbed his cuffs and started the process.

“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you?" Jay said 

“I understand.” Cornelius said and Jay nodded and they led him out of the hospital in cuffs. Connor walked back into the room and sat down and took your hand, you had warmed up considerably. 

“He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re staying with me for now and forever.” Connor whispered and listened to your heart beat. “Please be alright and wake up. I need you, Sis.” He said and kissed your hand.

 —-----------

6 hours later you were slowly waking up to bright lights and you groaned which woke Connor up. “Con?” You asked as your eyes opened more and he was quick to stand up and lean over you.

“I’m here, Sis. How are you feeling?” He asked

“Hurts.” You said and he smiled sympathetically.

“I’m sure it does, you have some broken bones and ribs.” He said 

“He tried to kill me.” You said

“I know. It’s taken care of.” He said not wanting to overwhelm you with information. 

“I don’t want to be with him anymore. I want to live with you.” You said and he smiled.

“You aren’t going to be living with him any longer. You’re going to be living with me.” He said and you smiled and you started to close your eyes again. “Go back to sleep. Rest.” He said and you nodded and went back to sleep.

—-----------

A few days later you were out of the hospital and being guided into Connor’s huge apartment. He helped you every step of the way. While you were out, he went to his father’s house and picked up all of your stuff. “Where do you want to sit right now?” He asked.

“The couch.” You said and he nodded and helped guide you over and helped you sit down. 

“I’m going to get your medication out and ready and I’ll bring it to you in a minute, ok?” He asked and you nodded your head.

“Ok.” You said and got comfortable. The bruises were still there and he saw red when he saw them. He walked into the kitchen and did what he said he was going to do and then was bringing it out to you with something to drink. He sat down and handed the pills to you and you put them in your mouth and took the drink and washed them down. Once the water was gone you leaned back and closed your eyes and he smiled and he put the now empty glass on the table. He got comfortable and then you were snuggling into him. He smiled and kissed your temple. He turned on the TV and turned the volume low. “Con?” You asked.

“Hmmmm?” He asked

“Thank you for being the best big brother.” You said and smiled.

“Thank you for being the best little sister.” He said and you chuckled but groaned. “You, ok?” He asked and you opened your eyes and looked at him.

“Yea, my ribs just hurt.” You said and he nodded.

“Those painkillers should be kicking in soon. That should go away.” He said

“What happened to dad?” You asked and he sighed he knew this was coming.

“He was arrested for attempting to murder you. He rammed into your car and pushed it down a hill and into a frozen lake.” He said and you nodded. “But he is never going to be near you or have custody of you ever. You’re stuck with me forever, well until you're 18 and then it becomes your decision.” He said and nodded.

“Good. I love you, Big Bro.” You said 

“I love you too, Lil’ Sis.” He said 

Now that you live with your big brother you have freedom and can do what you want and hang out with who you want. Life was finally turning around for the good and you had Connor to thank for that. All it took was a car accident and your dad trying to murder you but you were with the one person that you should’ve been with a while ago. You may have had blood ties to your father but that bond was broken and it had been broken for a while but now you were safe now. Safe with Connor and he wasn’t letting you go anytime soon.

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[adventuringblind]

hi, could you perhaps do an Oscar x Autistic reader where the reader is sensitive to loud noises and uses earplugs in public or where they has them but don't use them because they think they can get by without them but actually needs them. you can choose. Love the series!

Discreet

Oscar Piastri x Autistic Reader

Summary: Reader has been told all her life that she will scare people off with her headphones. Turns out they actually help a lot!

Warnings: mentions of toxic past and ableism

Notes: meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..... I feel called out by this ask tbh.

Masterlist

Should she be wearing her headphones? Yes. Is she? No. Absolutely not. Why, you may ask? Because she was raised that wearing headphones is going to scare away people. Make her more of an alien in the world than she already feels.

It was supposed to be a calm after party. She'd wanted to celebrate with Oscar for an amazing weekend. Oscar underestimated how rowdy the group could get. Lando had invited half the grid to his hotel room.

It's far too loud for her. A small enclosed space, a variety of different smells mix together, the lights are flashing from the TV. It's all too much for her. It's so loud she can't think properly.

She's currently hiding in the corner of the room with the least number of people. She's doing her best to calm herself down, but the longer she stays here, the harder it gets.

A presence is made known to her by the wall vibrating from weight being slumped against it. "Did you bring your headphones?" Oscar asks from beside her.

She wants to say yes. Tell him she brought them like she was supposed to. But she hadn't because this is a social event, and she doesn't want to scare anybody away.

Oscar takes her lack of words and gestures as a no. "Well, I brought ear plugs just in case. We can sit here until you feel able to walk again, and then I'll come up with a lame ass excuse to get out of here. Sound like a plan?"

This time, she does nod her head. She takes the ear plugs from Oscar and fits them into her ears. It's not the greatest at stopping the noise, but it's something for now.

She takes a few deep breaths and hides her face in her boyfriends shoulder. Effectivley keeping the lights away for a minute.

She taps his hand to signal she's ready (a secret code they'd created for non-verbal moments like this). Oscar helps her up, and then they clamber over to Lando. Her feet are tripping over everything as they do so.

"Thanks for inviting us, Lan. We're gonna go get some sleep now."

It's not even an excuse. It's probably just the honest truth. Regardless, Lando smiles at them and thanks them for coming.

Outside the room, she feels like her lungs are less restricted. Her senses claw at the relief as they walk back to Oscar's room. Her body feels relieved as she puts on her comfy clothes and throws herself under the covers.

"You know you can wear your headphones, right love? It's nothing to ever be ashamed of." Oscar crawls into the bed next to her. She sidles up to him, laying her head on his chest.

"I know. I just - don't want people to be scared of me." She mumbles the last part, but Oscar still hears it.

"Your real friends will be the ones who don't care if you wear headphones or not. They help you and you like them. That's all that matters."

She is able to relax on the thought that Oscar will always want the best for her. He doesn't care that she stims or follows the same patterns. And he'll never mind if she wears headphones. He thinks they make her look more badass anyway.

[apocalypticvalraven]

Delicious in Dungeon in The Kitchen

So... I was struck by the thought that I kinda wish some food nerd would go through the Dungeon Meshi dishes and analyze them and sort of give a "this is the real world thing they're making" run down.

And then I realized I'm a food nerd that can do research.

So.

We're gonna try this out, starting with Volume 1. I don't promise that I know everything about cooking. I don't promise I'll always be able to make the thing I'm looking at (I am broke, and I don't have my own kitchen). But I can at least look at a dish and figure out what they're doing and how to replicate it, at least sorta.

Dungeon Meshi Volume 1-- Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot

The two main components of this dish are the Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom.

Walking Mushroom

Looking at the images in the manga, Walking Mushroom seems to just... be a mushroom that can walk around. There are no organs, the interior seems pretty uniform in substance...

Like, literally, that's exactly what sliced mushrooms look like. Senshi cuts the mushroom into ~4" strips (judging by their size next to the small cabbage-like vegetable, and comparing those plants to his hand in the image of him gathering them. I am assuming dwarf hands are roughly the same size as human hands).

There's a variety of edible mushroom that is probably as close as we're going to get to the size of a Walking Mushroom, growing a cap up to 3' wide, but it seems to only grow in termite mounds in a very specific part of the African continent (please forgive my USAmerican, White education leading me to not being able to identify the specific region), so... if you can get that at all, it's probably crazy expensive (as it should be, unless you're literally getting it from the mounds or local markets yourself). Portobello or similar large culinary mushrooms are probably just fine. The Mushroom Feet are literally just mushrooms, so no worries there.

Huge Scorpion

Ok, so... there is a difference between arachnids and crustaceans. As a start, arachnids have book lungs and crustaceans have gills. Arachnid guts are different from crustacean guts, just because of environment. Hell, crustacean limbs grow differently from arachnid limbs.

That said, everything I see in Dungeon Meshi implies that, from a culinary standpoint, Huge Scorpion is a crustacean-

So, really, it's just a big lobster. Take a lobster, cut off its legs, antennae, and the tail fluke, and you're going to see something that looks pretty similar to the huge scorpion in Dungeon Meshi.

Seaweed

Next is seaweed, which... is just a thing, but also kind of an imprecise term, I think. Basically, "seaweed" just refers to any marine algae that is multicellular and macroscopic (big enough to see). Arctic Moss seems to be a real thing which refers to a couple things- the aquatic moss Calliergon giganteum and the terrestrial lichen in the genus of Cladonia, which includes Reindeer Lichen.

Reindeer lichen is edible, in a number of ways, but it's also not seaweed. So we look at Calliergon giganteum. I cannot get an answer as to whether this particular variety of moss is edible. So... fuck it, say Senshi used Reindeer Lichen, at least we know that's edible.

"Star Jelly" is... I don't know. The main result I find when googling it is that it's the sort of general term for various slimes that show up on lawns and other vegetation, etc. Which means it could be anything from amphibian spawning jelly to who the fuck knows what.

However, one thing it could be is a cyanobacteria known as Fat Choy, a commonly used "vegetable" in Chinese Cuisine:

Looks like jelly? Yep. Looks weird enough that you might imagine it comes from a star? Yep. Edible? Yes!

(I mean, maybe don't eat a ton of it, or get it from irreputable sources. At least some Fat Choy contains a toxic amino acid which may or may not have negative health effects, but I'm not a doctor, so all I'm saying is "be aware of this." It's an expensive delicacy, which means that it is a particularly lucrative target for counterfeiters, and China does not have strong, or strongly enforced, food safety laws).

The Hard Stuff

So that leaves "Invertatoes" and "Dried Slime."

Neither of which seem to have a good direct analogue to the real world. Well... sorta.

Invertatoes seems to refer to the plants. The name calls to mind potatoes, and potatoes do indeed grow in the ground and are starchy. It's probably fair to just use any kind of starchy tuber as the "invertatoes." Maybe cassava, since those are large enough that it's at least somewhat believable that "Fantasy Land Cassava" could look like that (although that doesn't fit the "these are normal plants that grow upside down" unless we're being really generous).

The problem is that it's sort of implied that the cabbage-like vegetable seen in the hot pot comes from the same plant, and everything from a potato plant other than the potato itself is toxic. They also don't look like that.

I literally don't know what those cabbage/lettuce-like leafy vegetables are. They're not seaweed, because the two varieties called out definitely don't look like that. They're not, so far as I can tell, the greens of any kind of starchy tuber--

EXCEPT.

So, I was taking one last look at tubers to see if I could find something that seemed to match, and I think Invertatoes could be likened to something similar to chicory. Particularly endives. I never knew endives were related to chicory (ie, "that thing that I'm aware is popular as a coffee substitute in the South, but I don't have much desire to try it, and I wonder if it even has caffeine..."), but, apparently, yeah. Endives are a member of the chicory genus.

So, yeah, lets say that Invertatoes are a sort of fantasy plant similar to the various members of the chicory genus. The trunk can be replicated with chicory root, and the leaves with endives.

That leaves Dried Slime. Dried Slime makes up the noodles in the hot pot, which implies that the noodles are gelatinous, and probably low in gluten. Senshi's explanation of the slime makes me want to think of it as a macro-unicellular lifeform, but... I'm not sure that's accurate.

While it's definitely not an accurate way to describe a jellyfish, I could definitely see a non-biologist describing jellyfish in a way similar to the way Senshi describes the slime. I could also see some fantasy terrestrial jellyfish thing hunting in a similar manner to the slime. Moreover, there are edible varieties of jellyfish, and they're processed in a manner very similar to what Senshi describes for processing slimes. And one way of preparing edible jellyfish is to thinly slice it into noodles.

Hot Pots

I... think this is using a very specifically Japanese sense of "hot pot" (which makes sense), because in Japan, hot pot can refer to a dish called nabemono, while in general, hot pot refers to a particular kind of dining in China where you get a pot full of boiling stock/broth and a bunch of raw ingredients, and you put the stuff you want into the broth at the table. Nabemono is more of "put a bunch of stuff in a pot, and cook it. Serve it boiling." Which is to say, it's soup.

Senshi puts the scorpion meat and mushroom into a pot on its own, and lets it start boiling-

Then, while it's boiling, he goes and finds other ingredients, coming back with the invertatoes and the slime. The two are prepared simply-

Seasoning isn't included in the ingredients, but I can understand this as a choice for presentation. We do see Senshi add something to the broth after tasting it, and I think it's fair to assume it's one of soy sauce, mirin, fish sauce, or similar. I think it's actually really interesting that we see Senshi add seasoning, but we're not told what it is-

Because... that's cooking. You can follow a recipe, but ultimately, you need to taste your cooking and make your own decisions. Senshi lets the soup cook, tastes the broth, decides it needs something, and gives it a bit of time to let the flavors meld before serving it up.

Dungeon Meshi Lobster and Mushroom Hot Pot

So, we're looking at something like this for the "Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot"--

Lobster- ~5 lbs or more (a 1 lb lobster yields about 4 oz of actual meat, which is a single serving), cut into large slices

Portobello- 2 mushrooms large diced, 2 left whole with the caps scored

Reindeer Lichen and Fat Choy- to taste

Chicory Roots- ~1 cup, diced

Endive greens- ~2 cups

Jellyfish, thin sliced- as much as you like

Add lobster and mushrooms to water, and allow to boil. While it comes to a boil, prepare the other ingredients, then add to the water. Let the soup come to a full boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 15 minutes to an hour (can simmer longer, but this will affect the texture of the ingredients. Longer simmering will result in more melding of flavors, but also degraded solid parts).

Taste the broth. It will likely need salt and acid, which could come in a variety of forms, such as kosher salt and lemon juice, soy sauce and mirin/rice vinegar, oyster/fish sauce, or something else. Go with your gut and your taste buds..

[melswifeasf]

Safest in your arms pt 10

previous chapter || next chapter || series page

Pairing: Georgia Miller x fem!oc

Summary: fall fest was supposed to be a fun activity for Samantha but it turned into nothing but a huge disappointment.

Warnings: (18+) MDNI, cursing, age gap relationship (18 and 30) grooming.

HALLOWEEN WAS THE BEST time of the year which all six friends could account for. they could dress slutty, get drunk and go to parties the whole weekend. it wasn't until their sophomore year they ditched the whole 'binge scary movies and stuff their faces with candy' deal and started going out instead. they had wanted to go to a party that night but none of them had planned a costume and Ellen had said she preferred her daughter to just go out on Saturday instead. Samantha didn't push it, it wasn't like her to do so.

the group of friends were in Matthews like most weekends. they were all sitting on the couch except for Natalie and Oliver who were on the floor like they had been last time they were there the last they were there. it was almost midnight and she thought by now she would be with a certain blonde but her friends were very persistent on her staying and she couldn't say no. even then that didn't stop her from texting her.

🍑 : are you gonna be at the festival

tomorrow?

S: prob? depends on if my friends

are going

S: are you?

🍑: i have to since Paul is running for

mayor again, he needs everyone in

the office with him.

S: does this mean Georgia Miller is

going to dress up?

🍑: i have to do that?

S: ofc you do, ur in the Mayors office

you kind of don't have a choice

🍑: does that mean your dressing up?

S: for the festival? no lmao.

S: i prob will later though, i think we're

going to some party

🍑: will i be able to see your costume?

S: i'll send pics;)

🍑: i'll be looking forward to it

🍑: what will your costume be?

S: idk tbh, we're all dressing up together

but they can't decide on what it should

whilst she waited for a response from the blonde she put her phone face down in her lap and turned her head to look at her friends. she was laying her head on Jades lap, her hair was being played with softly. Nia had Samanthas legs on her lap and Matthew was sitting beside the brunette with a respectable space between them. it was understandable that they wanted to keep things between them under wraps, especially considering they were still taking things slow and Oliver was overly protective when it came to Nia and her love life. she only ever had one boyfriend during her Junior year but it only last six months because Oliver would always try and scoot himself in between them. it wasn't fair, Nia never did that with him and Nat.

"i think we should go as nuns" Matthew said and looked up from his phone. they all laughed.

"the day i see you in a nun outfit will probably be the day that i die." Jade said with a chuckle.

"you putting that on would be an insult to nuns and i'm not even religious like that," Natalie said.

Matthew rolled his eyes, "okay i get it, i like sex." he shrugged. Samantha wondered if he was actually offended or if he was just acting like that because he always did. a part of her would believe he was offended, especially since the girl he currently had a thing with was sitting right beside him and listening to everything. although that shouldn't matter, Nia knew who Matthew was since the day they met and it's not like all of that knowledge would disappear now that they were figuring things out.

"more like you get around." Jade mumbled with a small chuckle making the girl in her lap slap her arm softly in warning.

"what about the avengers?" she proposed, trying her best to differ the conversation from him and to something else. "there's six of them so the numbers check out" she continued.

Oliver scrunched his nose, "i don't think any of us want to be hulk"

"or hawkeye" Nia mumbled.

Samantha sighed, "okay. any other ideas?" they had been going at it for a while now and it was starting to annoy everyone in the room. it was just hard, none of them wanted to pick something basic but there weren't that many group costumes, especially with six.

"we could all just wear purge masks" Natalie shrugged making both Samantha and Nia grimace.

"ew that's like super 2019. that is the most boring shit ever" she said shaking her head. Natalie sighed.

"okay then i don't know"

the room fell silent once more as they thought about more ideas. Matthew was on his phone searching for ideas but he seemed to be coming up with the same things over and over.

"what about toy story" Nia said making the raven girl point at her in agreement.

"i can be barbie. she's hot" she said earning a small smile from Jade.

"true." she agreed.

"holy shit," Oliver muttered making them all look at him in confusion. "Matthew and i could be Kens and you girls could be barbie." he proposed with a huge smile. that didn't sound like a bad idea at all, she doubted anyone else would think of doing that. it just surprised her that Oliver was the one to think about that over everyone else. she'd expect that from Nia or maybe even Jade but Oliver? that was something she never saw coming.

"why are you actually kind of a genius" Nia said matching her brothers grin.

"i think i'm more of a raquel though," Jade said, her lips twisted to the side as she was looking at the space in front of her in thought.

"i totally see that" Natalie nodded then gasped as she looked down at her boyfriend in excitement. "we could be Ken and Barbie from the Toy Story movie." she said happily.

Oliver's grin grew wider, "you're a genius babe" he said and the blonde shrugged sheepishly before she leaned down to press a soft kiss on the boys lips.

"i'll be howdy Ken," Matthew said, his lip curling into a smirk.

"valid, valid." Samantha nodded, "i never thought i'd see you in a cowboy costume and honestly i love that for you"

Nia frowned, "but then what would i be? i don't want to be in some horrid 80's work out jumpsuits" she said sadly.

"you could match with me" Matthew offered, his smirk gone and replaced with a small smile that everyone else in the room messed but Nia couldn't.

"yeah, you guys would look great." Natalie said to try and encourage her friend. they really needed to come to a conclusion so they could get the costumes the next morning.

"that just leaves you," Jade said looking down at Samantha.

"i'll be og barbie. you know, with the pink dress? god i'm gonna look so hot" she sighed out a bit dreamily causing them all to laugh.

"i sometimes forget how obsessed you are with yourself," Natalie chuckled.

"whatever, it's called self love." Samantha bit back and threw up her middle finger at everyone in the room.

they all started to talk about what they needed to buy which wasn't much since most of them already had clothes that could go with it. the only person who didn't was Natalie and Oliver because he needed a hawaiian shirt. Samantha figured her dad would have one though she offered to try and look for one for him. Samantha would just wear a pink dress that she already had and wear glittery eyeshadow along with pink heels to really seal the deal.

Samantha didn't feel her phone vibrate any more meaning Georgia hadn't texted her back. she tried not to overthink it, the blonde was probably asleep by now. it's not that she needed to talk to Georgia every minute of the day but the blonde had been a bit distant since the morning and she wondered if she did something wrong. the day that they hooked up Samantha and her stayed up another hour before the blonde grew tired and fell asleep, as soon as she did Samantha snuck out through the balcony. it was thankfully still slightly dark outside, the sun had just began to rise so it wasn't completely light outside. things were fine even the morning after, their dynamic didn't change but she was starting to wonder if the blonde had just now started to regret it, the reality of it all finally sinking in. the thought alone made her stomach hurt.

now that she knew what being with Georgia was like, life before her seemed so boring. nothing compared to the night they shared, the chemistry, the passion and overall it was just so fucking hot and every time she thought about it a light shade of pink would cross her features. her overthinking was cut short by Jade who locked her phone and threw it on the empty spot beside her.

"guess what i heard," she said a small smirk playing at her lips. everyone stopped to look at the girl, each of them just as confused, including Samantha who was looking at her with furrowed brows.

"what?" Oliver chuckled.

Jade looked down at Samantha, "Sophie Sanchez and your sister are talking." she said, her smirk never leaving.

"holy shit, are you for real?" Matthew laughed in slight amazement. Samantha didn't say anything as she waited for Jade to respond to him. there was no way Max was talking to someone - specifically someone she knew and wouldn't tell her. the thought alone hurt her feelings more than she thought it would.

Jade nodded, "yeah. i heard it from Kate. i think she even invited her to some party Brodie's throwing." she laughed and anyone who had common sense knew she was making fun of Max.

the raven haired girl didn't even care to comment on that. all she could think about was the fact that her sister was talking to someone and she didn't bother to loop her in. maybe she was a hypocrite considering she didn't tell the girl about her ex girlfriend but that was different, she couldn't tell Maxine because she knew it would ruin a lot of friendships and she didn't think it was fair for that to happen when all she wanted to do was to be happy. Maxine didn't have that problem, it's not like Samantha would get mad if she talked to Sophie. she just wished she was important enough in Maxs life to have been in the circle. maybe she was a shittier sister than she thought she was.

the girls mood had drastically changed and the only person who seemed to notice was Nia who began to rake her fingers through the girls hair. "you okay?" she asked softly, her eyebrows furrowed in worry.

Samantha shook her head as she tried to form a smile, "yeah." she whispered.

both of them knew she was lying.

the next day the group of friends all rode together to the festival. they had all gotten everything they needed for their costume and there was a while until they needed to get ready so they decided why not go. Natalie Oliver were still parking the car seeing as there wasn't any empty parking spaces so they dropped the four friends off before driving off to try and find a space. as soon as Nia and Jade saw that there was fresh apple cider they each broke away from Matthew and Samantha leaving them on their own. they were each waiting for the two girls near the face painting station where Samantha could clearly see her sister and her friends.

what she had heard yesterday was still fresh in her heart and seeing her sister only made it sting even more. she never thought she would be left in the shadows of her sisters life and yet here she was.

she wasn't the only one overthinking though. Matthew glanced at the shorter girl briefly, his heart was beating faster than usual which he had never felt before. why was he nervous? he only felt like this before games. he sighed, "can i ask you something?" he spoke up breaking Samanthas stare in her sisters direction and directing her sight toward him.

she had an idea of what he would be asking but nodded regardless, "what's up?"

"has Nia told you anything.. about us lately?" he asked a bit hesitantly, he paused to try and get the words out without seeming too n invested.

Samantha shook her head, "about what?" she asked feigning confusion. she didn't want to throw her friends under the bus like that, especially not with the literal guy she was crushing on.

Matthew looked at her with 'seriously' look on his face. "you're her best friend and she hasn't said anything? i don't believe you" he said and crossed his arms against his chest.

the raven girl rolled her eyes, "if you already knew the answer then why'd you ask."

Matthew shrugged, "i want you to be honest."

"she has."

"what did she say?" he quickly responded.

Samantha looked at him with raised brows, not at all used to seeing him this desperate. "just that you guys talked during Sophomore sleepover." she said honestly. they hadn't really spoken since and she assumed it was because they were taking things slow.

Matthew nodded, his face turning so he was looking in front of him and not directly at the shorter girl. "that's it?"

"did you want her to tell me something else?"

he shook his head. "i just.. i know she likes me and all but i don't know if she would want to actually go on a date with me." he said scratching the back of his neck nervously.

Samantha's expression softened, she now understood that it wasn't just one of his usual conquest, he actually care for Nia. "i think she'd say yes"

"really?" he asked his head snapped back toward the girl. she nodded with a gentle smile.

"yeah."

the boy couldn't contain his smile so he turned back around, "okay" he confirmed. neither of them could continue their conversation considering the sole topic of it was walking toward them with a cup in hand. she was laughing at something Jade had said and Samantha didn't miss the way the boys eyes shinned at the sight. she loved them together.

the brunette and Jade approached them, each holding a cup of cider. "want some?" Nia offered Samantha as she held her cup out but Samantha shook her head.

"im good. thanks though." she said earning a smile from the brunette as she went back to talking with Jade.

soon enough Oliver and Natalie were walking toward them hand in hand, once they were caught up with the group they walked around a bit to see what they could do. there were some activities which they participated in which really just means Oliver and Matthew would compete with one another. they spent half an hour carving a pumpkin which both looked equally as bad, none of them had the heart to tell them that though. that thankfully didn't last long since they all went toward the stage when they heard Paul begin to announce who had won the decoration competition. they all knew who the winner was even before so it was really pointless.

Samantha could see Georgia up on the stage, their eyes met for a second, each of them sharing a smile before the blonde turned to talk to her coworker. the six teens were in the crowd, half of them whispering to each other whilst Nia and Matthew were watching Samantha and the blonde exchange small glances.

"bootylicious really takes the whole costume thing seriously." Matthew said with a small smirk knowing the name he called her would annoy her.

he was right, the raven girl rolled her eyes at him. "shut up" she mumbled making both Nia and Matthew glance at one another in amusement. she looked so hopelessly in love and yet couldn't see that herself.

"best window decoration," Paul announced, a small card being pointed at him so he could read off of it. he was wearing a suit that was unbuttoned to reveal a super man costume, he was even wearing a black wig and glasses to complete the look. "goes to.. Liz Chavez" he finished earning an applause from the crowd. they watched as a trophy was brought up to Paul before her gave it away to the winner. "winner of best apple pie," Cynthia which isn't a surprise at all. "to the surprise of no one, goes to Cynthia Fuller." as they all expected. everyone began to clap once more but neither Samantha nor her friends did.

"bitch," Jade muttered under her breath making them all laugh.

"careful, the witch might hear." Matthew quickly whispered before turning back toward the front so they could watch the red head take a picture with the mayor. Samantha saw the small and cold interaction between her and Georgia when she grabbed the trophy from the blondes hand. that made a smile form on her lips, she loved that about Georgia. the camera snapped a quick picture and the redhead pulled away from the mayor and behind him on the stage.

"and now a very exciting announcement from the mayors office. we are going to be renovating the Wellsbury public library." cheers erupted from the crowd once more, even from the six teens who were glad they were finally going to do something different in the town.

not everyone had the same reaction though, Cynthia walked back up toward the front of the stage clearly upset with what she had just heard. "but the library is one of the most historic buildings." she said.

"exactly. this is why it deserves upkeep." Paul nodded. "we're gonna be adding a third floor. we are going—"

he was quickly interrupted by the red head who sounded even more upset, "upkeep? sounds like your plan is to depreciate a beloved landmark." she said in a condescending tone then reached over to snatch the mic causing it to make a slight squeaking sound making everyone cringe.

"fuck." Samantha muttered knowing whatever was going down wouldn't be good.

"what Wellsbury deserves is a mayor with a vested interest in preserving that standards in this town. i mean, first the drugs, now the library. where does it stop?" she said. cameras were snapping pictures repeatedly, each of them wanting the hot new story for the day.

"bitch needs to get laid," Nia joked earnings snickers from the group.

"someone get her a broom so she can fly away." Oliver added making his girlfriend shove him softly, not able to contain her amusement at his words.

"green gardens actually allowed us to have a surplus that far exceeds—"

"i saw Mayor Randolph last night on a date." she interrupted him, talking louder to drown his words out. murmurs erupted in the crowd causing her to nod, "yes. with his assistant" she confessed pointing at the blonde in accusation.

the crowd fell silent at her words just like Samantha felt her stomach drop, her before amused expression replaced with a blank expression. the three oblivious teens began to whisper their surprise whilst Nia and Matthew looked at their friend worriedly. they glanced at one another, each of them trying to have a silent conversation so try and figure out what to do.

Samantha's eyes locked with Georgia who looked nothing short of regretful but she quickly looked away, turning her attention to Paul making that horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach intensify. this was why she had been super distant they day before. she probably couldn't find the balls to tell her that she wanted to end things then. it shouldn't even matter, they aren't even together but that didn't take away the absolute pain she was feeling in her chest. was this what all of her one night stands felt when she didn't talk to them anymore? was this her karma?

she chuckled softly, her head shaking in disbelief. she felt stupid for ever thinking her and Georgia could be anything but a simple fuck.

"let's go." she said dryly, not even turning to look at her friends as she began to walk away from the crowd. not even Cynthia making a skeptical of herself could make her feel better and all she wanted was to get that horrible feeling out of her body and never have to talk to Georgia again. the pettiness of her words didn't matter to her, she didn't care that it had only been two months since they met, or that they only had sex once and that they never agreed to be exclusive. it was the fact that Georgia didn't tell her, the fact that she kept her in the dark and even texted her asking if she would be able to see her after she went to the halloween party because Ginny would be out til late. did she think she could just keep her little date a secret?

no, fuck her.

none of them questioned her as they walked to Oliver's car, at least not until they were actually in it. "why'd we leave? i wanted to get my face painted." Oliver said when he began to pull out of the parking space. his words earned him a slap in the back of his head from his sister who was sitting directly in the seat beside him.

"ouch, what the fuck?" he said his hand rubbing the impact to try and soothe the pain. Nia shot her brother a look through the rear view mirror which cause him to shut up a second later. Samantha wasn't paying attention to Jade and Natalie who looked extremely confused by the whole situation.

thankfully Matthew was the one who solved the problem which meant more to Samantha then she could ever really express. "Sam was having an attack." he lied. well, it wasn't a complete lie, she was having a sort of anxiety attack but it didn't have to do with the crowd around her.

"are you okay?" Jade asked quickly after, she turned her head to look at her friend with worried eyes.

Samantha nodded softly, "i'm good. i just didnt take my meds today." which also wasn't a lie. since she stayed the night at Matthews she didn't have her pills. she was planning on taking them before going to the party since she wasn't planning on drinking, the idea of driving to Georgias house drunk was incredibly irresponsible but that wasn't the case anymore and she was starting to regret it. in fact the only thing that could make her feel better at this point would be blacking out so she didn't have to think about her shitty love life. funny how she went from not having one just a month ago and now it was more complicated than ever.

[reysdriver]

Baby Furniture | J.P.

James tries building a crib without magic — james x pregnant!reader fluff

warnings: reader is pregnant

words: 0.5k

"That's a lot of parts, are you sure you don't want to use magic?" You asked your husband as you both looked at all the pieces to assemble the baby furniture.

"Hundred percent sure." James answered. "I can't have my kid finding out I built their furniture the easy way instead of with my hands."

"We could just not tell them." You suggested, even though you knew he was set on building it himself. 

"We have to tell them. I want my kids to be proud of me. Besides, this'll probably be a piece of cake once I get started."

You bent down a bit to kiss him on his bird's nest of hair. You gave it a tousle as you stood back up, and he gave you a grin. 

"Trust me, my love, I've got this. And if I don't, I'll just ask Sirius for help when he comes over tomorrow."

You sighed, and went into the next room to read in bed while he started putting the crib together. Only, he didn't put the crib together. For a whole half hour, he cussed to himself about the confusing instructions, the tools he was using, and the stupidly similar screws. 

As comical as it was, you felt bad for him. You put your book down on your nightstand and walked over to the next room. He put down his hammer at the sight of you in the doorway. 

"How's the crib going?" You asked, despite the obvious answer on the floor. He only had a few pieces of the frame put together, and you couldn't even tell what part it was supposed to be yet. 

"Not too bad." He lied. "I'm really getting the hang of doing things the Muggle way."

"That's great. Well, I'm gonna have a nap because this little one likes making me tired at two in the afternoon. Maybe I'll get to see the finished product when I wake up?"

"Of course. You're gonna be so impressed."

You two exchanged smiles before you left the room and crawled into your bed. Looking down, you lovingly whispered a few words to your baby bump. "Your dad is a stubborn one." 

You fell asleep too quickly to hear much more of James working, but your assumption was that it didn't go well. So, when James gently woke you up and told you to come look at the crib, you weren't sure what to think. 

He opened the nursery door and revealed an actual crib. The whole thing was perfect and it looked just how a crib was supposed to look. 

"Ta-da! Aren't you impressed with me?" James asked you. "I bet you had gone to sleep thinking I wouldn't be able to make it, but here it is."

"You used magic, didn't you?"

He looked at you with an exaggeratedly offended expression. "You don't believe I could have made that with my own two hands?"

You tilted your head and raised your eyebrow. You both knew what had happened in order to get that crib together. 

"Yeah, I used magic." He admitted. "But, I'll do it the Muggle way for baby number two."

[clonemando]

Aaahhhhhh more kiss fics from you!?! Yes pls!!!

Could I very kindly ask for Fox/Thorn and number 24 - a sleepy kiss pls?

(And thank you for shouting me out as well!)

Thank you for the request! Also all I could imagine during writing this is this: fox is eepy meme and was giggling. Enjoy!

Fox felt like he was floating, like back when he was a cadet and they had swim lessons and they were all taught how to lay on their backs to conserve energy while waiting for rescue. Although that floating was scary because there was a darkness under the waves that could swallow them up at any time. Wherever he was floating now was safe and warm.

"I'm glad you think so Foxy. Does this mean you're finally awake now?" A voice rumbled from under him and sounded close to his ear. It was familiar.

"Thorn?" He asked cracking his eyes open and wincing at the light in the room.

"Yeah, it's me. I told them if you woke up alone you'd go crazy and probably wreck the room before clawing your way into a vent to escape. What do you remember?" He asked and Fox snuggled closer, hiding his face from the light in Thorn's chest feeling a kiss get dropped to his forehead.

"Mmmm there was... A fight?" He tried to figure out what happened but his brain felt like an empty crisper that had been scrubbed clean. He knew there should be more mess in there and no matter how many times he opened the door nothing new was showing up.

"Yeah, Palpatine was evil, which we knew, but he was more evil than we realized. He was gonna try to do some sith ritual on you but you poked me in our bond thing and I was able to get some Jedi to come help. It was a crazy fight and I got my mind jacked for a minute but Windu managed to pull another prime and take his head off. It was satisfying to watch." He admitted and Fox grumbled.

"Don't 'member. Head ain't got no food in it. Like a crisper." He said then frowned into Thorn's chest as his partner laughed at him.

"Yeah turns out he left a lot of darkness goop in our brains. The Jedi helpfully scraped it all out but it takes some of the affected memories with them. The rest of us made video journals first but you were in a... a bad state. So they had to do you without any backlog. Give it some time, we'll get new healthier food in that brain crisper for you Foxy." He promised and Fox wanted to be grumpy about it but everything felt so bright and floaty and nice so he just grunted.

"Need mornin' kiss and some caff... 'm eepy." He whined looking up at Thorn finally through squinted eyes and it earned him another kiss, this time right between his eyes. He almost went cross eyed trying to see it.

"The fox is eepy..." Thorn nearly squeaked looking absolutely gleeful and Fox thought he might need to do something about that but he really was still exhausted and moving to elbow Thorn's kidney would mean having to move and he was so comfortable where he was.

"Thoooorrrnnn... Don't be mean. I'm tired. Can't punch you hard enough." He whined. Thorn finally kissed him on the lips like he wanted.

"Fine. You're just so adorable like this. I need to have the Jedi scrub your brain more often. Just go back to sleep Fox. I'll be here when you wake up again." He murmured and Fox hummed eyes already slipping shut again now he got what he wanted.

"Promise?" Fox asked as sleep started to steal him away again.

"Yeah, I promise." Thorn agreed and Fox felt fingers start petting through his curls and was gone.

[splitster]

answering more asks!!

featuring pom wraith, pingo, ocs?!, and older art check it out (three's some art 💖)↓↓

THANK you!! ohhh i do have old pikmin ocs... i actually revamped my old captain a while back, i can share him:

i had a whole crew of pikmin ocs who were a part of the S.S. Harmony, they were gonna be SUCH a nuisance to everyone they ran into...

i thought about making a rescue corps oc for fun. hrmm! maybe...

AHHH thank you!! i've seen a shocking number tags and asks from people saying that I'm apparently the reason they like Dingo now? and i have to say that is so mind boggling to me, because when i first played Pikmin 4 I didn't care about him at all!! he was a nothing sandwich to me... but then i drew him a few times... and started thinking... and then things went downhill and now i REALLY like him...

(referring to this post) i think dingo is better when he's withered

(referring to this comic) I HEAR YOU... I HEAR YOU... but if any tear at all would cause oxygen poisoning, i wouldn't be able to draw them all battered and cool :(

i imagine that there's a seal around the neck in case there's a breach in the suit's lining. so as long as their backpack (life-support) works and is connected to their helmets, then they can breathe✨

(referring to this post) Olimar would be horrified because he knows Louie, and if he sees that note there's only one thing it could mean! his coworker tried to eat pom!! if pom hasn't been outed as wraith and Olimar is questioning her, she'd just say Louie bit her and then refuse to answer any follow up questions 💖

Shepherd would be... concerned. she might think they have a weird fling going on and louie's talking about a kiss? she probably wouldn't realize Louie quite literally means he ate something from pom. oops!

that's a really good question... I'll be honest, with a lot of the "when and how did x happen" questions, there's not an official timeline or anything; the pom wraith au is sort of an umbrella with a bunch of different stories and what-ifs underneath it. although there was one story where louie does find out her secret!

louie and pom end up bridging their differences (with the help of olimar), and become good friends while pom is continuing the rescue effort. then there's a very unfortunate incident where pom and louie are away from the base and they're attacked... pom has to reveal herself to defend them and she accidentally hurts louie :(

its fine though, louie doesn't care what pom is. they're both freaks in his mind and that's all that really matters. he does end up having to defend pom from olimar (who's been made vindictive through his trauma with the plasm wraith) sometime later!! here's some older art:

sure

me too! they do NOT get along... louie's kinda pissed at her for chasing him around on PNF404 and beating him in dandori battles when he just wants to stay there and vibe. pom meanwhile doesn't understand him, he pisses her off too! she likes olimar a lot, and as an outsider it looks like louie doesn't appreciate the friendship olimar offers him. to someone who's trying to understand and participate in this whole friendship business, she thinks he's ungrateful and weird. they do not get along!! at the beginning at least...

AHHHH!!! THANK YOU!!! WAHH...🥺💖💖 i'm very glad you enjoy my silly little art style!! i want to make things very squishy so i appreciate that 💖

i don't think that man is going to live!

wait actually if you eat enough maybe you just turn into a wraith. that'd be scary! hopefully olimar's there to stop him

that's a fun thought! he would probably be able to sense that something is off about her. but he'd also probably just think "she's weird like me." honestly, the whole wraith thing doesn't really matter much to him -- the only thing it changes is that pom can now offer her tendrils as a skewer for his cooking at any time and location!

i think i'm gonna call her rose wraith!! and ohh, i didn't know that... i was just gonna call her rose wraith since she has a rose head. i'm creative i promise

(referring to this post i think) AHHH hehe... honestly, when Pom first learns about Dingo's fear of blood, she only tries to keep him from it because it's really annoying dealing with your coworker when they faint. he's like a sack of potatoes when he's knocked out. but yes, as they become actual friends pom will (subtly) do her best to keep blood away from dingo. it's fortunate she doesn't have any!

she might not get phobias, but she understands what its like to have a crippling fear, so she's empathetic!

THANK you. he has sunglasses. he's pretty cool

AHH THANK YOU... i like them a lot... 👉👈

let the marching pikmin give you the energy you need to practice🫡

[atwas-meme-ing]

HEY ALL!!! If you haven't heard, Unity is gonna start charging devs 20 cents per download. Not per sale, but PER DOWNLOAD. This applies to not only big-name games like Hollow Knight and Ori, but also smaller projects that might be free. This includes mobile games made with Unity, Undertale fan games like Undertale Yellow and Deltatraveler, and also, get this: Murder of Sonic! It was made in Unity, and so far, it's still free, but Sega's gonna hafta start charging for it sooner or later- IF they don't decide to take it down completely.

So, on this note, I have 2 things to say:

Get your favorite games NOW. Some devs, like Team Cherry, are talking about "taking their games down" (so much for Silksong- thanks A LOT, Unity!!!). I don't know if that means you'll still be able to play these games- like on Steam, for instance- if you already have them downloaded.

Please, please, PLEASE, support those games that are made with Unity. 20 cents adds up when there's a million downloads, and if it's like a mobile game, where people don't necessarily have to pay for it, that's going to COST the devs money- a LOT of money. I know we all hate the paywalls and "pay-to-win" schemes in mobile games, but let's be real- crap like this Unity thing are the whole reason those paywalls exist! These devs aren't doing this for free, they're trying to make a living! Even if you only spend $1, only 1 time, that is STILL going to be an 80 cent profit over the new Unity costs, and maybe, just maybe, give some game devs enough incentive to keep the game around.

I know Unity has a bad rep because it's easy to use and allows devs to release games that control poorly because you don't have to be good at coding to do it (*cough* Guardian of Lore *cough*). That's why I haven't used Unity, despite having several game ideas in my head, because I don't know how to code (yet), and I didn't want to release a game like that- and now I never will use Unity. But games like all the ones I've mentioned are proof that Unity CAN be used for good games, in the right hands. So please, if you love a game made with Unity, please support it, so the game doesn't go away. Don't send the devs into bankruptcy just because Unity is a money-grubbing so-and-so.

(Oh, I should also mention, for browser-based games, apparently this "per download" thing also includes "per BROWSER REFRESH". So, yeah, please don't blame the devs, support the devs and blame Unity.)

EDIT: It's not quite as bad as I'd thought. I knew Unity had a threshold, but I thought it was an either/or thing- either a certain number of downloads, or a certain amount of money made from a game. And, it's not, it's both.

So free games (like Murder of Sonic) apparently won't be affected.

Here's their pricing schedule once the threshold is met:

It still adds up for the smaller projects, with Unity taking all or most of the revenue from smaller games.

And one thing that's still bothering me: the install threshold is "life to date" and Unity is charging per install over the threshold. So, if a game's been around for years and had a million downloads and has made 200,000 dollars in the last year, they're gonna end up paying that 200,000 all at once.

At least, that's what I'm reading.

So, ok, I was wrong. Free projects won't be affected. But this is still awful, especially when it's first starting out.

EDIT 2 (2023-09-23): They've lessened the fees:

I'm still not using them. They never had a good reputation- I mean, there's good Unity games, but there's also a lot of bad ones because people can just release games with Unity with no coding experience. I want to make games someday, but I want them to be a good quality, so I'm waiting until I can actually figure out C++ (heck, I'm still wading through HTML, I'm nowhere near real programming languages). As long as I have to learn coding to make something good, I might as well find an engine that I can trust. I hear a lot about Godot. I also think I'll want to look at Monogame, because Monogame was used to make Axiom Verge and Celeste, and it's apparently based on the defunct XNA that was used to make Stardew Valley. Or I'll find something else. But not Unity. I just don't trust them.

[irisintheafterglow]

has rockstar!gojo been done yet because i have some things to say

"whatcha drinking there?" a second weight sinks onto the couch and you eye the figure warily from the corner of your vision. you can't see his face well but you think it's a guy; he's got bright white hair, round-rimmed sunglasses, and a half-closed black button up.

"not sure; it was ordered for me. something sweet and dangerous, fruity enough that you can't taste the booze," you answer, crossing one leg over another and propping an elbow on the back of the couch. your body was buzzing with warmth in the stale air of the house, and you'd lost sight of your cousin who begged you to come to the party with her. it was a wealthy colleague's 20something-eth birthday and she wanted to pretend to be in a higher tax bracket for the night. though most of the other people at the party radiated predatory vibes, the other occupant of the couch didn't, keeping a respectful distance from you as you continued to try to make out his face.

"i know a little something about being sweet and dangerous," he drawls and you catch the corner of his mouth turn up in a smug grin. despite the cheesy line, he still keeps a polite space between you two. you scoff at the contrast between the flirty words and the chivalrous body language, taking another sip.

"oh, goodie, another perv ready to slip something into my drink and take me god knows where until i'm a tragedy on the local news," you deadpan and, to your surprise, he laughs. his laugh is boyish and light; it sounds like sunshine. your heart and mind are at odds with each other, one telling you that he might be a good one and the other cautioning against sweet-talking men at parties.

"have people actually tried that on you tonight?" when his laughter dies back, his voice drops its teasing lilt for something almost...concerned? you shrug, leaning your head in your hand. he mirrors your position and you unconsciously scoot a little closer to him. to hear him better, you reason.

"eh, you know how it is."

"say the word and i'll have them out of here before you can blink." it's your turn to laugh at his pretentious arrogance, but you lock eyes with him over the rims of his glasses. they're electrically bright and calculatingly lethal, like clear blue water during high tide.

"what, you gonna tell your security team to kick them out?" you joke, continuing to nurse the remaining alcohol in your hand. you don't expect him to hum and raise his eyebrows thoughtfully; something in your head whispers that he might not actually be kidding. he was an enigma compared to the others that approached you. he hadn't tried to touch you, get your number, or look down your shirt. odd, yes, and admittedly intriguing.

"i could do that, if you want me to. i don't like it when creeps bother pretty people." he flashes another sly grin and his hair falls to the side as he tilts his head. he was pretty cute, but you were still skeptical.

enough. get down to the nitty gritty. "what do you want?"

"hmm?" his sharp eyebrows furrow in confusion.

"what do you want, if you're gonna call me pretty? you want my number, or my socials, or to take me home or something?" you stare at him expectantly and his eyes narrow ever so slightly like he was offended. maybe he wasn't used to people outwardly asking him if he was going to toy with them.

"truthfully, all i really want is to try your drink, and possibly get your name."

"oh," is all you're able to manage after any more biting words disappear from your vocabulary at his honesty. it was off-putting how nice he was, but you decide to humor him and hold out your glass. there's barely any liquid left in it, but he downs it in a blink.

"oh, shit. that's really good."

"right? i wish i got the order because i wanna be able to get that wherever."

"if you do get the order, send it my way too because that is delicious." from what you could tell, it was mostly vodka, with a little bit of strawberry or cherry punch on ice. there was another flavor you couldn't place, something fresh and earthy. maybe mint?

"i'll ask my cousin, then. hopefully she isn't too shit-faced to relay what she told the bartender." he laughs again, that breathy chuckle that made your heart skip a few beats. "how do you know the birthday girl?"

"friend of a friend of a friend."

"i see. this place not really your scene?"

"it is, sometimes. depends on the people present."

"what's your usual scene, then?"

"concerts, mostly." he runs a slender hand through his hair and you fight the urge to stare at its elegance. his voice was smooth and melodic and you leaned closer to him until it was the only thing you focused on. you're close enough to see his fingernails, painted alternating shades of red, blue, and purple. he looks at you like you're the best thing at the party and the rest of the noise fades into the background. "i like when music connects people. it's the closest thing we have to invisible strings tying everyone together, you know?" so he's the poetic type.

"mhmm. do you play any instruments?"

"i sing, sometimes. my band plays in this area."

before you can ask his name or give him yours, a tall man with his hair pulled back and a woman with a short bob steals the stranger away. he glances back at you apologetically, murmuring something about it being a pleasure to meet you. at the end of the conversation, you were left with an empty glass and an unshakable feeling of disappointment.

the subtle ache in your chest whenever you thought of him lasted several more days than you would have liked it to. you texted your friends about it numerous times for cathartic reasons but nothing worked. you wanted to figure out the mystery behind his identity and it was driving you out of your mind. the unrelenting feeling of restlessness was replaced by dread when your cousin dragged you to a concert in some underground venue, insisting standing as close to the stage as possible. you agreed on the condition that she order you another glass of the drink you had during the party.

despite the loud screams echoing through the chamber and the bodies knocking against your arms, the music wasn't terrible, especially when you had a few more drinks. as the night progressed, you found yourself constantly drawn to the lead singer. intuition said you'd met him before, even though it was impossible considering that he was one of the most popular musical artists on the planet. music officials called his innate talent and musicianship the most powerful of the time, earning him the nickname of "honored one." he had a reputation for being a rulebreaker, constantly voicing very blunt opinions regarding the older, more conservative artists of his genre. he was also rumored to be a player, always hopping around from lover to lover and never staying with one too long. it drove the fan accounts on twitter absolutely mad.

even if he was a heartbreaker, he was a professional nonetheless. he certainly knew how to put on a show, sweat dripping from his spotlight-shining hair and licking his lips enticingly while he sang sweet nothings to the audience of swooning fans. his crowd work was admirable and you found your face heating up when he crouched down in front of you between songs. his voice was raspy and overtly flirtatious, but it still bothered you that you'd heard it before the show and couldn't pinpoint where.

"hey there, pretty. you likin' the show?"

"mhmm, the 'drenched in sweat' look is really doing it for me."

"well, i used the last of my water to uh, baptize those ladies over there," he remarks, gesturing with the mic to a group of teenage girls that were shrieking at the top of their lungs. "mind if i get a sip of what you're having?"

"as long as you don't turn it into a super soaker."

inches away from you, you realize his eyes are a vibrant shade of blue and they crinkle at the corners from your joke. he laughs, boyishly happy and contagiously bubbly. you'd seen those eyes and heard that laugh weeks ago, on the night your cousin brought you to that party. in that moment, the realization collides with your body like a semitruck and your legs nearly give out. everything makes sense instantly: his voice, his hair, the way he called you "pretty."

you'd been flirting with gojo satoru.

and he was right in front of you, asking for your drink again in front of hundreds of people.

after a tense moment of stunned hesitation, you carefully hand him your glass and watch his face wash over in realization when he takes a sip. despite the screams from the crowd at the intimate interaction, all you could hear is his voice.

"oh, shit." he stares at you so intensely your heart does a backflip before slamming into your eardrums. the way he's looking at you tells you all that you need to know, all that you wanted to know ever since the night of the party. "that's...that's really good." he observes you for half a moment longer before he remembers what the hell he was doing. he stands to continue the show, but he flashes a knowing grin like he was telling you a secret.

"welcome to my usual scene, pretty."

your cousin is shocked, to say the least, when a security guard finds you after the show and requests your presence backstage.

how did this turn into 1.6k words i meant for this to be a drabble lol but anyways hope you enjoyed it

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[thisapplepielife]

Written for the @steddiemas challenge.

King Steve

Prompt Day 12: Hallmark Movie Tropes | Word Count: 9963 | Rating: M | CW: Royal Inaccuracies | Tags: King Ralph AU, Unexpected Royalty, Platonic Stobin, Happy Ending, Steve POV

This one is also available right here on AO3.

Loosely based on the 1991 comedy King Ralph, starring John Goodman, but this time make it Steddie.

Steve shoves the key into the lock of the Wienerlicious front door, and jiggles it just so, trying to get the damned thing to open. Robin picked this place as their next place of employment, and he's pretty sure it was just to stick him in another goofy uniform so she could call him dingus more often.

Jokes on her. He looks damn good in lederhosen, way better than she does in the milkmaid getup. So, suck it, Robin. 

Even if he's too old for this shit. He's nearly thirty, and they're still bouncing from crappy job to crappy job, aimless.

He needs a purpose, but he just hasn't found it. Not yet.

He flips on the lights, and goes through all the opening procedures on his own. Robin won't be in until later, so he's gonna be on his own through the lunch rush. If there is a lunch rush. Sometimes, that's non-existent in this place. 

And it seems like today is gonna be one of those days. He hasn't had a customer in an hour, and he's bored out of his goddamn skull. Just watching the hot dogs turn on the roller grill behind him.

Finally, the door swings open, and in walks three stuffy-looking men in suits. Glancing around the place like they're walking in front of a firing squad instead of into a fast food joint.

"Welcome to Wienerlicious," Steve greets.

"We're looking for Mr. Steven Harrington," the first one says in a British accent, and Steve narrows his eyes. He doesn't think he owes money to anyone. Especially not to anyone British. Robin and him might be scraping by, but they've managed to do it all on their own.

"Who's asking?" Steve asks, putting his hands on his hips.

"I'm Gareth Jones and this is Inspector Goodwin and Inspector Williams," the first man says, like that means anything.

Steve doesn't think he's committed a crime, Pink Panther style, but maybe? He wishes he'd stolen some cash or jewels, but he hasn't, so he's not sure why they've sent two inspectors all the way to the Wienerlicious to talk to him.

"And you're here for…" Steve trails off, moving his hand in a hurry up and spit it out motion. He'd rather get this over with.

"Well, sir, that's a private matter for us to discuss with Mr. Harrington," Inspector Goodwin chimes in, and they are definitely British.

"Then, I guess you're shit outta luck," Steve says, moving back to wiping down the counter. "If you decide you want to order something, you let me know."

He watches them look between each other, clearly debating this offer. But they step up to the counter and study the menu, with a hint of disdain, before ordering three number seven combos. Steve makes them, and puts down the red baskets on a tray. Taking their money, and handing over their change.

They're staring at his name tag. Fuck. He forgot he was wearing it.

"Are you Steven Harrington?" Gareth asks, leaning closer, nearly across the counter.

"And if I am?" Steve asks, taking a step back.

"Then we have an exciting opportunity to share with you," Inspector Williams says, gleefully.

"Listen, I'm not gonna, like, sell Amway or knives or anything. So, just. No, thanks."

They look back and forth, like they don't understand what he's talking about.

Steve sighs, "I have a job. I don't want another, no matter how much money you think I'll be able to make, so thanks. But, no thanks."

Because, yeah, he's in lederhosen, but he's working with Robin and he gets a predictable paycheck. It's a fair trade-off.

"Sir, please, just give us a moment of your time," Gareth pleads, and Steve is annoyed.

"Just arrest me if that's what you're here for," Steve says, nodding towards the two inspectors. Robin will sort it out.

"Oh, no, sir. Not at all. They're here for your protection, for your safety," Gareth says, and Steve wrinkles his forehead at that idea. He's pretty sure he doesn't need protection. "Please, just hear me out, sir."

"Fine, one minute," Steve says, following them to a table, and sitting down, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Mr. Harrington-"

"Steve," Steve interrupts. 

"Steve," Gareth, the chatty one, says, but it seems physically painful for him to get out of his mouth, "it is my glorious duty to inform you that you're the new King of the United Kingdom, Your Majesty."

"The new King of what now?" Steve asks, because he's been King before. Sure, it was Hawkins High and not the United Kingdom, but he'll pass. He's grown and shit since then.

"Of the United Kingdom, and the entire Commonwealth, Your Majesty." 

Steve laughs, because why wouldn't he laugh. That's ridiculous. 

Then he remembers seeing the news headline that the entire Royal Family had been electrocuted and killed during a holiday photo session, and that they were searching their records for the next heir in line for the throne.

Steve bets they didn't expect to find him in lederhosen, slinging wieners with sauerkraut. 

"But I'm an American," Steve finally says, shaking his head.

"We are unfortunately aware, sir," Gareth answers.

"Then, how am I the next in line? That makes no sense." Steve questions, he's never even been to England. 

"On your mother's side. There's no delicate way to say this, but your grandmother had an affair with Prince Richard, and your mother was the product of that affair. So, you're in the line of succession for the throne through the House of Wyndam-Pryce bloodline."

"Okay, go talk to my mother then," Steve says, "she'd love to be a Queen."

"It doesn't work quite like that. See, there's what we call male-preference primogeniture-"

"Well, that's just sexist," Steve says, crossing his arms. He doesn't know what that last word means, but he definitely understands male-preference and can fill in the blanks.

"Yes, well, perhaps that's true," Gareth says, looking flustered, then looking excited, "but you could press to change that! As King. With the help of Parliament. You could work to change it."

"Now, Jones," Inspector Williams says, "you know the law prohibits Monarchs from solving problems."

"Yes, well," Gareth says, backing down a little, "that's a different issue altogether."

"This all seems suspect," Steve says. He wishes Robin were here. She'd know what to ask, what to say to all this. "If I'm not solving world problems, which to be honest, I'm not sure I'd be all that great at anyway, what exactly does this even entail? Is it not like being the President here?"

"No, that's more like the Prime Minister," Inspector Goodwin answers, "not exactly, but closer. You, as King, would be a ceremonial figurehead."

Steve is confused, but that's not exactly new. 

"I don't understand," Steve says, because he definitely doesn't.

"You are the new King. It's your birthright, sir."

Steve is pretty sure he's not interested in any birthrights. He's seen Buffy. Kristy Swanson was hot, but he doesn't want any of that shit for himself. No fucking way.

Unless.

"How much does it pay?" Steve asks.

"Well, it doesn't, exactly…" Gareth trails off.

"Then, again. No," Steve says, moving to stand.

"But as the sovereign, it all belongs to you. To the Crown," Gareth says, and Steve starts picturing that and now it doesn't sound so bad at all.

"All of it?"

"All of it, Your Majesty," Gareth confirms.

"So, are you willing to go with us, Your Majesty? To England?" 

And maybe he'd make a different decision if Robin were here to talk him out of it, but he nods.

"You can't go be the King," Robin says, pacing around the room, one of his shirts clutched in her hands. He jerks it out of her grasp, and stuffs it into his suitcase.

"Apparently, I can," he says, "and you can come with me."

She scoffs, "And do what? Be your lady-in-waiting?"

"Yes!" Steve says, he doesn't know what that is, but yes, if it gets her to come. Absolutely. 

"Steve, no," she says, shaking her head.

"We'll get married really quick and you can be my Queen," he says, nodding his head, "think how fun that'd be? You and me? Ruling a whole country?"

"And the Commonwealth," she says, but shakes her head, snapping out of that idea. "No way, they'd make me have your babies."

"Ew," he says.

"Ew, right back at ya, dingus," she says. 

"Then, I'll go first. Scope it out. And you can come later, once I'm settled in."

"This is a bad idea, Steve," Robin says, really talking with her hands.

"Careful, I'm the King," Steve teases.

"Not my King, dingus, you better keep that in mind," she says, and he smiles, pulling her to his chest.

"I wish you'd come," he says.

"I don't even have a passport," she says.

"Well, neither do I. But apparently, as the King, that doesn't really matter much."

"Oh, this isn't going to go well," she says, pacing again, worrying some more.

"Maybe not, but it'll be an adventure, right? C'mon. Come with me," he begs, trying to give her the eyes. But she's immune.

"Maybe later. If this sticks. I'll get a passport, legally, and come make fun of you in your stupid cape or whatever," she says, and he hugs her again.

A day later, Steve steps out of the black town car, and looks up. Jesus. This place is wild. Fucking crazy, it's a palace, like, for real. He still kind of assumed they'd been teasing when they showed up at his place of work, explaining that while he was once 46th in line for the throne, that he'd now been bumped up to number one. Just because the entire extended royal family died in a freak accident during a portrait session for their annual Christmas card.

That's a lot to swallow.

Do they not have a designated survivor? Robin has told him about that, in the US. They should have, it seems like. Most definitely.

Water, metal and electricity did not mix. And snap. They were all gone.

And now he's here.

King.

He's being led inside this freaking mansion, and it's way less funny. He's a freaking American. A bastard, apparently, and he shouldn't even be eligible for the throne. Robin looked it up. Made sure he knew that, as she railed on him for even considering doing this.

But they were desperate. And here he is. Steve Harrington, American. King of England. No, Great Britain? United Kingdom? The Commonwealth? He scratches his head and scrunches up his face. He doesn't remember. They went over this on the plane, but he's already forgotten. Shit.

He's just pretty sure it's not the King of England. Even if that sounds right to his American ear.

There's some old, stuffy British dudes waiting to lead him around, and he follows. But he's starting to think he can't be the King. Not again. He's pretty sure being the King of Hawkins High will be nothing in comparison to this. This is actual insanity. 

Actual royalty.

They leave him in his new royal bedroom, and you could fit his and Robin's whole apartment inside this one room. He stands and looks out of the window, and feels homesick. He'd rather be in that tiny apartment with her, than here surrounded by all this opulence. He shouldn't have even agreed to get on the plane, especially not without Robin. They couldn't make him accept this offer, he's pretty sure. Even if they were pretty adamant about it, at the time. It felt like he didn't have a choice, even if he's pretty sure he did. Still does, maybe. He hasn't been, like, crowned or anything. He thinks he can still say no, and probably will.

He'd just been hand stomping lemonade and slinging hot dogs, minding his own business. He was just a little delirious and desperate for something new, anything at all.

He was bored.

And then there these stuffy dudes were, telling him he was the new King. 

It all happened so fast.

He should call Robin soon, to let her know he landed. He really wants her to move here to be with him, if he decides to stay. Surely, that's something he could make happen, with all this money and all these resources.

Someone clears their throat behind him, and there's a guy, probably about his age, standing there, hands properly folded behind his back. When Steve looks at him, he bows his head at the neck.

"Hey," Steve says, turning to face him fully, "I'm Steve."

"I'm Edward, your private secretary, Your Majesty."

"What can I do for you, Eddie," Steve says, and he watches as the man cringes at the informality of it all. He just doesn't look like an Edward. He looks like an Eddie. But if he doesn't like that, Steve won't force it on him. At least not to his face. Not yet. He'll wear him down, first.

"Nothing for me, sir. What can I do for you?" Eddie asks, stepping a little further into the room.

"Edward, I think I'd just like to go to bed," Steve says, and Eddie moves towards the bed, drawing down the sheets and fluffing his pillows. 

It's overkill. But nice. 

"Thanks, you don't have to do that, but I appreciate it," Steve says.

"Your dressing room is over there. I'm sure there's some proper sleeping attire," Eddie suggests, pointing towards the right door. "And if you'd like a bath before bed, I can draw one for you, sir."

A bath doesn't sound half bad, but Steve is pretty sure he can run his own bathwater. He might be the King, and isn't that a stupid thought, but he hasn't forgotten how to do basic things for himself, not yet.

Eddie does it for him anyway, despite Steve's protests, and then shows him the little turtle bell on the marble ledge that he can ding if he needs assistance at any time.

"During my bath?" Steve asks, raising an eyebrow.

And Eddie nods, "Any time at all, sir."

That's weird, Steve thinks, but watches as Eddie closes the big double doors, leaving him alone with his bath. He rings the little turtle bell, and Eddie comes back through the doors.

"Your Majesty?" he asks, hands clasped in front of him.

"Are there bubbles?" Steve asks, and Eddie looks taken aback, but quickly nods and produces a bottle of fancy looking bubble bath from a cabinet.

"Thank you," Steve says, smiling, and Eddie nods at him curtly, before leaving. Again.

Steve wants to ring the turtle, just for shits and giggles, but refrains. He wants Eddie to like him. He's close to his age, and maybe they could be friends. Well, maybe not, he's stuffy like his colleagues, just not as stuffy. That's for sure. Gareth and Inspectors Goodwin and Williams aren't exactly old, but they were a little uptight. 

When he's good and pruney, he gets out, and wraps a towel around his waist. When he opens the doors, Eddie is standing there, at the ready.

"You can sit down, you know?" Steve says, walking around the edge of the bed.

"I really can't, Your Majesty," Eddie says.

"Says who?" Steve hollers from the walk-in closet, where he's pulling up a pair of silk pajama bottoms. They're nice, and feel good against his skin. He likes them. He's definitely not wearing the matching long-sleeve shirt though. No way. He can't imagine how uncomfortable that'd be to sleep in.

"Royal protocol, sir."

"Aren't I in charge now? So, if I say you can sit, you can sit," Steve says, coming out of the closet, towel drying his hair.

"That's really not how it works, sir," Eddie says, looking away from him. Clearly trying to get Steve to drop it. 

He will, for now. But that man is sitting before this is over with. There's no reason for him to stand around all the time. Steve's worked retail. He knows how much that sucks, and he didn't even have to do it in dress shoes.

"Did you need help finding your top, sir?" Eddie asks, and Steve realizes that's why he's being so weird. Oh.

"Do I have to wear it?" Steve asks, pulling his towel over his chest. Maybe he's being weird, or creepy, right now. Is he sexually harassing his secretary? At home this is fine, normal. It's like a locker room, right? They're in his bedroom. But maybe that's not cool here, he has no idea.

"Well, no, sir," Eddie says, "but it would be proper. But you don't have to, I suppose."

Steve tries to slide in bed without flashing his hairy chest at Eddie again, pulling the sheets up to his neck.

"There, I'm in bed," Steve says.

"Very well, sir," Eddie says, pulling the drapes closed, nodding at Steve, and hitting the lights on the way out, "Goodnight."

"'Night," Steve says back, as the door closes, and then he's gone. 

And Steve's all alone.

These sheets are super soft, and so is the bed. Steve closes his eyes, and thinks he'll be asleep in no time.

He wakes up to the sun in his eyes, as Eddie is pulling open the heavy curtains.

"Good morning, Your Majesty. Did you sleep alright?" Eddie asks, bowing his head at Steve, and Steve really needs him to stop doing that. It's unnecessary. Steve sits up in bed and scrubs his hand across his face. He did sleep well.

"Yeah, I think I did, thanks," Steve says, stretching, as Eddie goes into his closet and starts selecting clothes. 

"We'll have to get you fitted properly today, but these should do for now," he says, laying out a pair of slacks and a dress shirt. A belt. 

"Okay," Steve answers. He can wear that. That's not so bad. "What's on today's schedule?"

And he wishes he hadn't asked, because the list Eddie rattles off is never-ending.

"All that today, huh?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods. Then steps out into the hallway so Steve can get dressed.

He stands in front of the mirror, trying to tame his hair. He shouldn't have gone to bed with it wet, now it really won't behave. He might need to wash it again. He looks around, and realizes there is no shower in his bathroom. He's gonna need a bathroom with a shower, the bath was fine, but not for everyday use. 

"Edward?" Steve says, opening the door, and Eddie follows him back in.

"Yes, Your Majesty?" Eddie asks, standing at attention.

"Is there a bathroom with a shower around here that I'll be able to use? I don't need it this morning, because of the bath, but in the future?" Steve asks, looking at Eddie.

"Yes, of course, sir," Eddie says, "I'll show you where that's at this morning."

"Thanks, also? Can I request some specific hairspray?" Steve asks.

Eddie pulls a little notepad out of his pocket, ready to take notes, "Of course, sir."

"Faberge Organics, the Farrah Fawcett spray," Steve says, and watches as Eddie takes notes. He doesn't even laugh at him. Maybe Steve should tell him it was discontinued, like, a decade ago. But it'll be funny to see how much sway this position actually holds. Maybe he'll send some staff member to find a lone can of it, long forgotten on the dusty bottom shelf of a drugstore.

"Of course, sir," Eddie says, putting the notebook back in his jacket pocket.

Steve steps out inside the hall, and isn't sure what he's supposed to do. Eddie must pick up on that because he holds his arm out, motioning for Steve to walk ahead of him. 

"I thought I could give you a more in depth tour this morning, sir, if you're feeling up to that?" Eddie asks, trailing him. 

Steve pauses, waiting for him to catch up. They start walking again, and Eddie's behind him again. Steve slows his pace, and Eddie slows his own. He feels like he's having to crane his neck back to even see Eddie as he explains all the rooms, all the antiques. The paintings.

That goes on for the whole tour of this floor, and then Steve waits at the top of the long, winding staircase. Eddie waits behind him.

"You do realize I don't know where we're going, right?" Steve says, holding his arm out, inviting Eddie to lead the way.

"Sir, you are the sovereign, no one walks ahead of you. Especially not your staff," Eddie says, and Steve looks at him like he's crazy, because that's a crazy rule. Steve is only King on a huge technicality. He's just a person.

But when it's clear Eddie is not moving until he does, he walks down the stairs, wishing Eddie would just fall into step beside him, at least.

And Eddie gives him the rest of the tour, from two steps over his shoulder. It's kind of weird and uncomfortable.

After the tour, he's led directly into a room to be fitted for new clothes, and Eddie stands nearby.

"We've prepared a few questions to ascertain your knowledge of English history," Eddie says, as they're measuring Steve for a new suit. 

Having your inseam taken is a little distracting, even under regular circumstances. Having three different pairs of hands nudging under your balls, right after you've been declared King, is another level of distracting entirely.

"Okay," Steve says, uneasy. He knows he knows nothing about history, "but I can tell you it's almost zero, right up front."

Eddie looks at him and asks, "When Anne Boleyn failed to give him a son, Henry VIII had her…"

Steve thinks, tries to come up with a logical answer, and settles on, "Adopt?" 

Eddie looks exasperated, "No. Beheaded."

"Jesus, that's a bit much," Steve mutters, and he swears he sees Eddie tamp down the barest hint of a smile. 

"Please pick a fabric, sir," Goodwin says, draping some swatches over his arm and showing Steve.

They all look the same to Steve. Various shades of dark, most with pinstripes. 

"You pick, Edward. I trust your judgment," Steve says, because he does. Eddie is dressed nicely, so surely he can pick the right thing for Steve to not look like he's wearing the curtains.

Eddie nods, quick and sharp, and then hands the chosen swatches over to one of the tailors. Pointing at three of them.

After his fitting, Steve is in jeans and a polo, even if Eddie fought him on it. "Here's a few traditional English dishes, sir, some of which you'll be served tonight. The kitchen chose things they thought you might enjoy, and I thought it might be prudent to make sure you're familiar ahead of time."

Steve nods. Okay. He can do food. He likes food. 

"Roast beef with Yorkshire pudding, fish and chips, bangers and mash, and of course, spotted dick." 

Steve's eyebrows shoot up as he looks at the bowl full of dicks in front of him that he had assumed were sausages. 

He grabs the silver tongs, and picks one up, carefully inspecting it like it might be a bomb, before looking at Eddie. 

"Dick of what?" he asks, scared of the answer. 

Eddie chuckles, "You're holding a banger. A sausage," he clarifies, pointing to some other dish, "that's the spotted dick, sir. It's a dessert." 

Steve looks and can see the raisins. The spots of the spotted name, he assumes. That's more reassuring.

"Please, sir, try it," Eddie says, so Steve lets him serve him a plate, so he can try everything so there's not an embarrassing incident at tonight's dinner.

"Sit, eat with me," Steve says, and Eddie shakes his head.

"No, sir," Eddie says.

"Edward, live a little," Steve coaxes, kicking out a chair leg, an invitation, but Eddie doesn't budge. Just stands at attention, a few feet behind Steve while he eats. It's good. He likes it. Even the spotted dick, which he can't even think about without laughing. How is he going to be able to eat it, or say it, in a public setting? Impossible.

"This is all good, I was scared what you might bring me, to be real honest," Steve says.

Eddie smiles, "Well, we went easy on you. I didn't think you were ready for the black pudding or haggis."

"I don't know what that is," Steve admits.

"For the best," Eddie teases, and Steve smiles at him.

"Tell me about yourself, Edward," Steve says, using his fork and knife to cut into one of the bangers. 

"I'm here to serve you, sir," Eddie says, and Steve looks back over his shoulder at him and rolls his eyes.

"No, about you. Not about me in relation to you, just about you."

"Sir, I don't really…" Eddie trails off, like he doesn't know what to say.

Steve won't make him talk, but he sure wishes he would. He'd like to get to know him better.

"If you won't sit, would you at least come over here where I can see you?" Steve asks, and he's happy when Eddie concedes, and comes into his line of sight. 

"How long have you worked at the palace?" Steve asks.

"Nearly ten years, sir. I've been a secretary for about two years, though. After my uncle retired, I was chosen to fill his duties."

Steve nods, hoping Eddie will continue and elaborate further. He doesn't.

So, Steve eats while Eddie stands by, quietly.

And it's weeks of meetings, fittings, lessons. Eddie and the rest of the staff are working diligently to get him ready to face the press and public.

Steve's trying. He really is, but it's a lot to comprehend. He doesn't understand all the rules, all the protocols, and he is constantly on the wrong foot. Doing something stupid, saying something stupid. He's never gonna catch on to this.

He flops back on his bed. He's going to make a fool of himself, and the Crown. 

Eddie comes in later, and takes one look at him, and starts digging in Steve's walk-in closet. He comes out with an all-white outfit and instructs Steve to put it on. 

Steve does. He's stopped fighting. Stopped asking why, a long time ago. It doesn't matter why, none of them care. He's just a small cog, in a big wheel. He's in charge, but he isn't. Not at all. None of his choices are his own. He's not sitting on a throne barking orders. He's following, trying to please the people around him. Trying to please Eddie.

Once he's dressed, Eddie takes him out to the yard of the palace, and gets down and straps big pads to his shins. They look like oversized, shin guards for baseball catchers. But padded. He was a catcher for one season in high school and hated it. It's the hardest job on the field, he's pretty sure. Pitching was easier. He did that in little league for a while. 

He's standing there in his padded shin guards, looking at Eddie for guidance. Eddie hands him a paddle. Steve tries to hold it like a baseball bat, and Eddie laughs, while trying to help him correct his grip. 

"This is a cricket bat, not a baseball bat, sir," Eddie says with a smile. 

"Oh, so more like croquet?" Steve says, lowering the bat in front of him, and Eddie grins.

"You know how to play croquet?" Eddie asks, looking surprised.

"Sure," Steve says, "I might not be royalty, but I do come from a rich family. Back home. We definitely played croquet from time to time."

Eddie smiles, and nods, "It's not like croquet. You want to keep the ball away from your wicket, not aim it towards it," Eddie explains, helping him adjust his grip, again. His instinct is still to draw it up like a bat, twirl it around in his hand. Test its heft. But Eddie tells him to keep it down, in front of him, to protect his wicket, the three stumps and two bails balanced behind him.

Once Steve is in place, Eddie yells, "Bowler!"

And the guy downfield throws the ball at him in a goofy fashion, bouncing it in front of him, and Steve hits it. And it sails up and away. They do it over and over. This is something he's actually picked up on quickly for once, and it's fun. Steve hits the shit out of the next one, and declares it a home run.

Eddie laughs, "A maximum, sir, but yes, the same idea, I suppose. Six runs." 

If it bounces to the boundary, it's worth four Eddie declares, and eventually Eddie goes to the other side of the little dirt rectangle, and they teach Steve how to run back and forth to accumulate runs that way, if he doesn't hit it out of the park.

"You can lead with your bat, sir, get it over the crease ahead of you," Eddie says.

"The line? The baseline?" Steve asks, and Eddie smiles. 

"Yes, sir, that," Eddie grins. 

And he runs past Eddie once more, passing in the middle, and he reaches up as they go past each other, offering him his hand, a high five.

Eddie clearly isn't sure about this, but still puts his hand up, and they touch as they run by each other, each headed to the opposite end from where they started. 

When they've finished, Steve leans over, his hands on his knees, breathing hard. But he's happy right now.

Once he stands, he looks at Eddie, smiling, and asks, "Do you want to play croquet next?" 

And Eddie laughs, honest to god laughs, and it makes Steve smile, big and bright. It's a great sound, and he hopes to hear it more often.

"Sure, Your Majesty, we can play croquet," Eddie says, and sends the pages to go find the equipment.

Pads shucked to the side in the grass, Steve watches as Eddie lines up his shot.

"Don't do it, don't even think about it," Steve says, breathing down Eddie's neck, taunting him as he tries to line up his mallet with the croquet ball.

Eddie laughs, and nudges him backwards with his elbow, and then freezes, like he's realized what he's done. Steve just shoves him back a little, hopefully assuring him that it's fine, that he likes this. That this feels normal, at least almost, and that's fucking priceless. To his sanity, to his heart. 

He's homesick for Robin, for America, honestly.

He wants to watch baseball or basketball on TV. He wants to drive his car. He wants a pizza, a burger, or some fried chicken. Anything. He can ask for anything he'd like to eat, and they'll bring it, but it's always a fancy version. They seem to have an aversion to actually just going out and getting him the junk food he's missing.

This has been a huge responsibility to take on, one he doesn't fully understand, with a very steep learning curve. But right now, they are just two guys playing a sport together, for fun.

That he understands, fully.

"This is the most fun I've had since I've gotten here," Steve says, standing next to Eddie as he whacks the ball through the hoop.

"I'm glad to hear that, sir."

Once the game is over, Steve stands there in the grass, happy. He looks at Eddie, "What sport can you teach me next?"

Eddie just laughs, "Polo, I suppose. How do you feel about horses?"

And then it's back to the unfun parts. Steve showers, and throws on the clothes Eddie has laid out for him. And he attends meetings. He has his weekly Audience with the Prime Minister, one-on-one, without Eddie present. They always make him feel nervous that he's going to fuck up.

But it's only twenty minutes. He can do anything for twenty minutes.

Eddie works sports into his tight schedule, and Steve appreciates it. It's not everyday, but it's as often as they can fit it in, and they play and Steve pushes himself. To get better. To have fun. 

To impress Eddie, a little, with the one thing he's been good at here.

 

Steve's having a bad day, and he's had enough, so he pulls a baseball hat over his head, and walks out of the front door. Nobody stops him, but he's pretty sure that's just because they've never had to deal with a Monarch that was trying to escape the way he is. But he's had all of this he can take today.

He doesn't get far down the road, before he realizes he is being followed. He turns and looks, and there's Eddie. So, Steve slows down, stalls, waiting for him to catch up.

"You coming with me, or are you going back to tattle?" Steve asks, and Eddie smiles.

"Where are we going, Your Majesty?" Eddie asks, falling in step behind him.

"I'm hungry. I want some food, some American food. Something I'm familiar with. No spotted dick, or whatever the fuck that was. Is there something around here that I'll recognize?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods, and then he waits for Steve to start walking again, keeping two paces behind him.

Steve glances back at him, "How did you end up working for the royal family?"

"My family. It's just what we've always done," Eddie says. "My uncle had this position before I did. When he retired, the last King asked for me to step in, to keep with some sort of continuity, I suppose. He'd known me for a long time, since my childhood."

"I'm sorry you lost your friend," Steve says.

Eddie pauses, like nobody has ever said that to him before, "Thank you, sir."

Steve nods, "Well, what would you like to do instead?" Steve asks, and Eddie looks at him, like he hadn't expected the question.

"Working for the royal family is the highest honor," Eddie says, and Steve laughs.

"Okay, that's bullshit. You don't want to serve people. You don't want to serve me. That's not your dream. What do you want to do? What would make you happy?" Steve presses.

Eddie looks at him, like this might be a trap, even if it really isn't. Steve genuinely wants to know what Eddie likes to do. He wants to know anything Eddie will tell him. Which really, really hasn't been much. He's definitely not very forthcoming about anything personal.

"I like to play music," Eddie finally says. 

"That's cool," Steve says, meaning it, "are you any good?"

"Not bad, I don't think. I play with my friends in a little four piece, when I have the time. The palace requires a lot of my time," Eddie says, and then looks embarrassed. "Not that I'm complaining. I'm happy to be at your service, sir."

"Steve," Steve says, "please, just call me Steve."

"King Steve," Eddie says, and smiles at him, just a little. Steve realizes Eddie's teasing him, and it makes Steve happy. Like they might be friends. Or could be, in time. He definitely needs a friend here.

"Well, that's not the first time I've been called that, so it's an improvement. For sure. But try to work it down to just Steve, in the future. At least while we're alone."

Eddie nods, but he doesn't look like that's going to be something he'll ever do.

They walk a little further, and Eddie stops in front of a Kentucky Fried Chicken. Perfect. 

Eddie ushers him inside, and into a hidden corner booth, before going up to order. When he comes back, he gently puts down the tray, and acts like he's going to start setting everything up, like this is a state dinner. It's definitely not.

"Just sit. Eat with me," Steve says, and Eddie looks uncomfortable.

"That's really not…"

"Does it look like I care, Eddie? Please?" Steve asks, and he pushes a styrofoam plate in his direction, and starts loading it up.

"Are you a breast, leg or thigh man?" Steve asks, and Eddie blushes a pretty pink.

Steve's pretty sure he's not a breast man, and that's more than okay with him. Maybe he can use that in his favor, someday, hopefully.

"Anything is fine, si-"

"Steve," Steve corrects.

"Steve," Eddie whispers, like he might be caught and reprimanded. 

Steve smiles, and puts a couple different pieces on Eddie's plate, then some mashed potatoes. Gravy. A couple biscuits, and looks at Eddie as he pushes it his way.

Eddie is just looking down at it. 

Steve reaches down and picks up his thigh with his hands, and takes a bite.

"Finger lickin' good," he says, and Eddie giggles, as he picks up a piece himself, and takes a bite. It looks awkward, and a little dainty, but it thrills Steve that he's playing along. Getting a little more comfortable with him.

He wants to get to know him, Eddie, the man under the suit. Maybe the man, out of the suit.

On the walk back, Steve looks back at Eddie. 

"Eddie?" Steve asks, and Eddie looks at him.

"Yes?"

"Was there really nobody else? Is it me…or nothing?" Steve asks, because he's pretty sure he can't do this. Doesn't want to. At least not long-term. Not for his entire life. He's given it a good go, but he's not feeling it, at all.

"Well," Eddie says, drawing out the word, seemingly unsure if he should keep talking. 

"Well, what?" Steve asks, pausing, and pulling Eddie off the sidewalk and into a little hedgerow. They stand there looking at each other.

"There was one other option, but he didn't want to do it, so I kept my mouth shut," Eddie says, looking at the ground.

"So, that guy could say no, but I'm just the schmuck who had to accept this thing? This weight on my shoulders?" Steve asks.

"I didn't know you then. You were just a name, a profile, on paper," Eddie explains, still looking down.

"And you knew the other guy?"

Eddie nods.

"Who is it? Do I know him?"

Eddie looks up, quietly asking Steve if he'll keep this secret, and Steve reluctantly nods.

"My Uncle Wayne," Eddie says, "he's retired, and already he did his duty to the Crown, and didn't want that kind of spotlight trained on him. He just wanted to go on, living his normal life. He didn't ask for it any more than you did."

Steve nods, he understands, even if it doesn't make him feel much better.

"Oh," Steve says, "I understand. I just wish, well, that I'd have been given more of a choice, too. If I said no, they'd have found him, eventually, right?"

Eddie nods, "I'm sorry, sir."

Steve gets it. Unless he wants to make that old, retired man sit on the throne, he's stuck.

"It's okay, Eddie. But I feel alone here, most of the time, so I'd like Robin to move here. Can that happen?"

Eddie shakes his head, looking sad.

"Sir, they're never going to allow you to marry your American girlfriend. It's been a hard enough sell for you."

Steve laughs, pushing his bangs back off of his forehead, "Girlfriend? No way. She's my best friend. Platonic with a capital P, only."

"Oh, well, then, yes. I'm sure we could arrange for that to happen, assuming she'd like to come."

Steve grins, wide. That's the best news he's gotten in weeks.

They start walking again, "Do you live at the palace?" Steve asks.

Eddie chuckles, and shakes his head, "No, sir, I don't live at the palace. It just seems like it."

He's teasing, and it makes Steve smile.

"Where do you live, then?" Steve asks.

"Right around the corner, actually," Eddie says, and Steve stops walking.

"Can we go see it?" Steve asks.

"You want to go to my flat, sir?" Eddie questions.

Steve realizes that was probably rude to invite himself over, "Only if you want me to. You're not obligated, of course."

"I didn't think I was obligated, Steve," Eddie says, "but it might not exactly be tidy. I wasn't expecting a royal to want to visit me at home."

"Do I look like I'm gonna care about that?" Steve asks, and Eddie smiles, and redirects them, but still keeps just behind his shoulder. 

Eddie's apartment is nice, and not as messy as he'd sold it as. Steve looks around, at the pictures on the walls. At his guitar on a stand by the couch. Eddie is digging in the fridge and brings him a beer, which Steve takes with enthusiasm. He's been offered wine, and liquor, at the palace, but this is just a regular beer. That he'll be allowed to drink out of the bottle, no glass in sight.

It feels like home, and he twists off the cap, sliding it into his shirt pocket.

Eddie sits next to him on the couch, and they drink, and just make small talk. It feels normal. Cozy. Like he's in someone's home, instead of a museum, and he longs for a place like this to call his own again. He took it for granted back home, and now he misses those days. Misses Robin.

They don't stay long, and just walk back to the palace after they've finished their beers, but it's the best night Steve's had since he's gotten to this country.

"I can't move to London," Robin says across the ocean through the phone, and Steve slumps at his desk. 

"But, I miss you," Steve says, twisting the cord around his fingers.

"Well, you should have thought of that before you packed your shit and ran away to play King," Robin snarks.

She's teasing, but it's true.

"Will you at least come to visit?" he asks, hoping. Begging.

"Of course," she says, "if you're paying."

"I'm paying. I'm the King, you know. Just be aware you'll have to curtsy to me," he teases.

"Yeah, never gonna happen, dingus."

But she agrees, so he puts Eddie on the case to set it all up through his office.

"I want to go to the movies," Steve declares suddenly, and Eddie looks over at him. They're sitting across from each other at a desk, as Steve's going over paperwork from his red box. Signing what he needs to sign, asking Eddie about what he still doesn't understand.

"The movies?" Eddie questions. 

"Yeah, you know, a movie theater?"

"I'll see what I can do, sir," Eddie says, with a smile.

 

That night, Eddie guides him to a secluded room. And it's a private theater. Right in the palace.

"This has been here all along?" Steve asks.

"Well, yes, sir, but it's really for the staff. But I cleared it tonight, for you."

Steve doesn't even care what they watch, he just wants to have some fun.

"Thanks, Eddie," Steve says, settling into one of the chairs. Patting the one beside him for Eddie to sit, and after Eddie's collected a bucket of already prepared popcorn from a table, he does sit, and hands it over to Steve.

They sit side-by-side, watching a movie, sharing the bucket of popcorn, and it feels normal for a couple hours. He could have been on a date, a regular date back home, tonight. 

But it's Eddie, and he can't kiss him at the end of the night, even if he'd like to. This gift from him was more than enough.

Eddie follows him back to his bedroom, and turns down the bed, and Steve stands there, watching him.

"Thanks for tonight, Eddie. I had a lot of fun," Steve says.

"Me too, sir," Eddie answers, "goodnight."

Steve is standing out on the step, bouncing on his feet, nervous. Excited. Robin is on the way, and when they finally pull up with her, she leaps out of the car and runs straight into his arms. Not a curtsy in sight. He catches her and spins her, hugging her tight. He didn't realize it until this very moment, that one of the things he's been missing the most is human touch. None of these people touch him. No friendly hands on a shoulder, or arm.

No reassurance. No checking on his emotional needs. No comforting him. No checking in, at all. He's just supposed to function, as is, all on his own, he supposes.

He's been needing a hug, he realizes, and he buries his face in her neck, and if it's weird, she's going with it.

"I'm so glad you're here. Welcome to my new home," he says, and she grabs his hand, and he lets her pull him into the palace and up the staircase, at a near run. Dodging staffers, who bow to him as he is dragged past them. They clearly disapprove, but he doesn't give a shit. This is the most normal thing he's experienced in weeks.

She pauses at the top of the staircase, but only because she doesn't know where she's going.

He nods to the left, and he's being pulled along again, giving her directions to his bedroom, and once they're inside, she launches herself onto his bed, bouncing.

He smiles, and hops up next to her.

"Holy shit, Steve, look at this place!" she shouts, eyes wide as she looks around.

"I know, right?" he asks, but he's only looking at her. She's the only thing in this whole room that he cares about, that he loves.

That night he wraps his arm over her side, crowding up behind her, and she lets him hold her, "I'm so happy to see you."

"You better not be that kind of happy to see me," she says, contorting to get away from his crotch.

He laughs, laying his head on his pillow, "I'll try to keep it in check."

"You better, dingus."

And dingus sounds like a better, more fitting, title than King ever has, a thousand times over.

He wants to be her dingus, he doesn't want to be the King.

Steve is startled awake in the morning, by Eddie at the foot of his bed.

"Oh, Your Majesty, I do apologize," Eddie says, starting to back away from the bed, "I didn't realize you had company."

Robin looks at him, giving him the once over, "Well, not that kind of company, Jeeves. Let's get that straight."

Steve laughs, and nods, "Definitely not that kind of company, Eddie."

"We're best friends," Robin says.

"Platonic with a capital P," Eddie repeats, "as Your Majesty has said."

"Your Majesty," Robin says with a cackle, rolling towards him, and he slaps her on the arm, and it just makes her laugh harder. "King Dingus."

"He hasn't picked a regnal name yet, so perhaps that could be an option?" Eddie says, and Steve can't believe it. It's the funniest thing Eddie's ever said in Steve's presence, by far.

Steve laughs, throwing his head back, melting into the bed again.

Eddie just looks confused, and a little alarmed. But he still draws back the curtains, and brings Steve and Robin in a wheeled cart full of breakfast and coffee.

"Thanks, Eddie," Steve says.

"Sir, madam," Eddie says, and he bows his head at the neck, and then he's gone.

As soon as the door closes, Robin slugs Steve in the arm, "You have a crush on Jeeves!"

Steve doesn't even try to deny it, just smiles, "Yeah, that's Eddie."

Robin stays two weeks, and then she goes back home to their real life. And Steve's agitated. He misses her. He should have gone home with her. 

Eddie comes in carrying a large, heavy by the look of it, cardboard box. Great, now what?

"What's that?" Steve asks, standing to go take a look as Eddie places it down on the table.

"Your hairspray, Your Majesty," Eddie says, opening the flaps, "I'm sorry it took so long. I had to convince Unilever to engage in a short, private production run, just for you, sir."

"No fucking way," Steve says, reaching in to pick up a can, and it's really it. 

He grabs Eddie and hugs him, shaking him around, and Eddie is just a ragdoll in his arms, but Steve could kiss him, he's so happy.

"Thank you, Eddie, you're now my favorite person. Robin, who?" he teases, immediately taking a can to the bathroom.

Eddie follows, and watches him as he sprays it on his hair and tries to style it, even though it's not wet. 

"Just wait until tomorrow, I'll look so damn good," Steve says, and he meets Eddie's eyes in the mirror, and Eddie's blushing.

"I'm sure you will, sir," Eddie says, and Steve can feel it between them. The sexual tension. The attraction. He's not sure how to do anything about it, if he even can.

But he wants to, and it's nice to have that feeling again. About anyone. And he's happy it's Eddie that's making him feel like this, because he really likes him a lot.

"Can we go swimming today?" Steve asks, and Eddie looks at the schedule, and nods. 

"I think we can fit that in this evening, if you'd like, sir," Eddie answers.

"Yes, please," Steve says. 

That evening, they walk down to the private pool and Eddie stands there while Steve strips off his shirt.

"Aren't you coming in?" Steve asks. He's assumed Eddie would. It's a sport, and that's one of the few things they do together, as almost equals.

"Sir?" Eddie questions.

"C'mon, get in!" Steve shouts, laughing, splashing water towards Eddie, which Eddie dodges easily. But Eddie nods. Disappearing into one of the locker rooms.

Steve's taking bets with himself, if Eddie will be in one of those silly old-fashioned, striped swim costumes with shoulder straps when he comes back.

He's not.

He's just wearing a pair of basic black trunks, and Steve can't help it as his eyes rake over Eddie's pale, exposed skin.

Steve's not sure he's even seen Eddie's forearms, let alone is his bare chest. He has a tattoo. More than one, it looks like, and Steve grins. Fully enjoying the view. Maybe he's not as buttoned-up as he appears on the surface.

Eddie comes down the steps and pushes off, and swims towards Steve.

"What now, sir?" Eddie asks, treading water. 

"I was thinking about laps, but anything would be good with me," Steve says. As long as he's with Eddie, he's in.

And they fall into lane lines, and Steve breathes to his left so he can see Eddie, and for once, they are side-by-side, equals. They both do a flip-turn and push off, resurfacing together. Steve smiles, and keeps kicking.

He feels normal, here, now. Swimming. His teammate beside him. And Eddie is his teammate, maybe the only one he has in this place. He's surrounded by people, but he feels like Eddie is the only one that ever actually sees him.

And he's happy as they swim, together, until they are both struggling to breathe, clinging to the side of the pool. Steve rests his head on his arms, and feels good. Really, really good.

His happiness doesn't last long. 

The next morning, Gareth comes into his office, with four or five other staffers trailing behind him.

"Your Majesty, we'd like to discuss taking the first steps towards the wedding," Gareth says.

"Whose wedding?" Steve asks.

"Yours, sir," Gareth says, and Steve sees red. He knew they were scheming to set him up on dates with various available women, but this is too far. He'll be the King, but marrying a stranger isn't happening.

"I'm not getting married!" Steve snaps as he storms out, turning to hold his hand up, giving the universal motion to stop, demanding that they not follow.

Steve only wants to find Eddie.

Eddie is walking down the hallway, and Steve accosts him. 

"This is too far, you can't tell me who to marry, Eddie!" Steve yells, and Eddie quickly grabs him by the arm, and pulls him into Steve's bedroom, and shuts the door behind them. Locking them inside.

"Your Majesty, please, it's for the good of the country. To protect your bloodline, your birthright. You're the last. You need to marry, and produce heirs. That's just how it's done."

"I'm not the last and you know it!" Steve screams.

"Please," Eddie says softly, like he's trying to tame Steve, "please consider doing this. It's the right thing to do."

Steve crosses his arms across his chest, "Absolutely not."

"Sir, please," Eddie says.

"Stop calling me sir, if you're gonna fuck me over, at least use my name, for god's sake."

"Steve," Eddie says, "we aren't doing this to hurt you."

"Well, it sure feels like you are. What about love? What about who I love?" Steve asks, his voice softer.

"Love must be subordinated for the good of the monarchy, Steve," Eddie says, his voice softer now, too.

Eddie has called him Steve, here, and Steve can't even be happy about it.

"No. No way. No, no, no."

"Princess Caroline is a perfectly acceptable choice. You need to do this."

"You're serious?" Steve snaps.

"Yes!" Eddie snaps back.

"I won't, I'm not marrying someone I don't love!" Steve assures loudly, and he means that. They can't make him. "This place is terrible, this job, it's bullshit! It's all bullshit! I'd rather be selling hot dogs, or ice cream, than to be locked up here in this gilded cage! At least at home my choices were my own and I could fuck up my life any damn way I saw fit!" Steve screams. 

"Steve," Eddie says, scrubbing his hands over his face and Steve's never seen him this undone, "Why? Why are you fighting this? This is just how things are done."

"You know why," Steve says, crossing the room and closing the space between them.

"I don't…that's not…" Eddie mutters, looking anywhere but at Steve.

"Eddie," Steve says, taking him by the shoulders, "look at me."

Eddie does, reluctantly.

"I can't marry Princess Caroline, because I love you."

Eddie's face falls, like he's just been given terrible news, and Steve's stomach drops. He's miscalculated this, all of this, and immediately lets go of him. They haven't been flirting, they haven't been anything to each other. Steve has misinterpreted their whole thing.

He feels sick.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Steve says, taking a step back, "I shouldn't have said that to you. Please, don't-"

But his words are cut off, when Eddie is suddenly moving towards him, and finally, finally presses his lips to Steve's.

Steve reaches his hand up, and cups the back of Eddie's head. It's better than he'd even fantasized about. He kisses him, over and over, holding him. Finally touching him in all the ways he's longed to, for months.

"Eddie," Steve breathes out, once they've separated, and Eddie just smiles at him and takes him by the hand, leading him towards the truly outlandish bed. He hadn't dreamed this is where the day would end up, even if he'd dared to hope. 

Eddie pushes Steve onto his back on the bed, and the dynamic has shifted in a way that Steve loves. Yes, please. More of this. He watches as Eddie pulls off his jacket, his tie, and unbuttons his dress shirt.

It's the best strip tease Steve's witnessed in his whole life.

And when Eddie crawls on top of him, in just his underwear, Steve laughs and wraps his arms around Eddie, pulling him close. Pressing kisses to his shoulder, his chest, anywhere he can reach.

After, Steve brushes his hand through Eddie's hair, holding him, as they lay together. Eddie's legs are tangled with his, and they're comfortable here, together. 

"I need to quit," Steve says, softly.

"I know you do," Eddie answers, pressing his lips to Steve's chest.

"Will your uncle take over? If I do?" Steve asks.

"I'll talk to him," Eddie assures.

"Will you go with me when I leave? Or will you need to stay with him?" Steve asks.

"At first, I'll feel I'm obligated to stay," Eddie says, "he's my uncle. He raised me. But after he gets settled, perhaps."

Perhaps isn't a no, so Steve takes that as good news, and just pulls him closer while he has the chance.

"Maybe, you'd like to settle in with me here at my flat, for a stretch. Before you go home," Eddie suggests and Steve nods. Absolutely. Yes, to that. Please.

Eddie and his speechwriters help him perfect his abdication speech, and write his Instrument of Abdication letter. Wayne Munson, at his side. Stoic and quiet, but willing now, to accept this responsibility. 

Steve signs it, and Eddie, Gareth, Goodwin and Williams all sign as witnesses to his signature. 

And it's done, basically.

"You boys do realize I have no children, so this might come right back to you, after I'm gone," Wayne says softly.

And Steve and Eddie both nod. They know. But they appreciate this time Wayne's given them, to live and love. It's a gift, because he loves Eddie and wants him to be happy. Steve knows that, and he won't take it for granted. Not ever.

In a few days time, he's standing before Parliament, something he's never had to do, before now.

"My Lords and Members of the House of Commons, I know it is unusual for a King to address you in this manner, but I have some things I'd like to say, that I'd like for you to hear them in person, from me," he starts, before going on to apologize for being too set in his ways, too American for this duty. But he explains that there is another heir, an English one, also born into the House of Wyndam-Pryce. He tells them that it was discovered after Steve had assumed the throne, but now that he knows, he feels it only right to step down. He introduces Wayne, and turns over the Crown, happily.

As soon as he steps back from the podium, he feels like the weight of the world has left his shoulders. He walks out into the sunshine and smiles, closing his eyes, tilting his head towards the sky. 

He's a free man, once again. 

Eddie is waiting, and takes his hand, and finally, for once, Eddie steps out ahead of him, leading the way.

There are lots of people standing around watching him pack, and Steve looks around, "Are they scared I'm going to steal something?"

Eddie laughs, "Well, maybe. You can't take anything that belongs to the Crown."

"I only want to take one thing with me," Steve says, smiling.

Eddie grins, lowering his voice, "Me?"

"Okay, well, two things," Steve teases, and Eddie cocks his head, curious.

Steve walks down the staircase, carrying the giant cardboard box of hairspray. Eddie holds the door open for him, and then helps him put it in the trunk. Technically, it belongs to the Crown, but Steve is sure they'll never miss it. If Wayne wants him beheaded for taking it, bring it on. The man hardly has any hair at all left, so he definitely doesn't have a pressing need for hairspray.

"So, how was it to be King?" Eddie asks, settling into the back of the town car beside him.

"Well, I met you and I got a lifetime supply of my favorite hairspray, so pretty good, overall," Steve teases, and reaches over and takes Eddie's hand, looking at the window as the palace grows smaller in the distance behind them.

He's not the King, not anymore. 

But he's Eddie's boyfriend, his partner, and he's pretty sure that's a way more important role for him to try and fill.

Notes: This originally started for Steddie Holiday Drabbles, but the length got away from me. And then really got away from me. I couldn't condense this into 1000 words, it seems. So, I did something different for that Royalty AU and used this one here.

Royalty isn't really in my wheelhouse, but King Ralph popped into my head, and made me cackle. Sure, I'll make American Steve an unlikely King. No problem.

I'm sure Eddie had the job of about a dozen men, here. Go with it.

Also? John Goodman is a damn delight. Nobody could deliver the "dick of what?" line better than that, though I had Steve try.

Wienerlicious was from the show Chuck.

House of Wyndam-Pryce is a Buffy joke. That's Wesley's last name, and Wyndham was the fictional name in King Ralph. So it seemed fitting.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddiemas and follow along!

[joi-me-hoi-me-noi]

Meeting them in the middle of a fight - JJK

This includes: Gojo and...Mahito... (i don't like him but I'm doing this for y'all who do)

CW: blood...yeah

SATORU GOJO -

You were planning to go into an abandoned building for a recording and you did but something was off. You swear you could see someone inside the building but you shrugged it off anyway. You continue into the building quickly and quietly making your way to the roof of the building.

"Who the hell are you?" A black haired boy side-eyes you while his white-haired friend with a blindfold stands there.

Before you are able to speak, a weird worm curse breaks through the building. With a snap of your fingers, it turns into a murder of crows.

"So... I'm guessing I stepped into a veil and by the way, you two are pretty slow." A crow lands on your shoulder as you scratch under its beak.

You turn to leave but before you can, the white-haired dude stands in front of you. You didn't even see him move, how fucking quick is he?

"I don't think I'm that slow." "By the way you froze in shock, I'd think completely different."

You go to climb back inside and he stops you yet again.

"What else do you want grandpa?" The boy in the background turns to the side, stifling a laugh.

"I was going to ask if you wanted a quick way to the ground, it's not safe up here with us hunting down a curse."

"I got it sir, thanks for asking though."

"What's your name?"

"Who's asking?" You pull out your phone and look at the bright screen, hitting a couple of buttons.

"Gojo Satoru."

You look at him for a second and then look back down at your device. "L/n."

"Not gonna tell me your first name?" You noticed his black-haired friend went inside to find the curse that was apparently hiding from them.

"You don't need it and I don't know you."

"You could get to know me." He approaches slowly.

"Why would I?" "Because you're intrigued and curious. I can tell by how you're looking at me."

He pulls a small sticky note out of his pocket and hands it to you. You read it over and realize it's his number, this random dude just gave you out of all people his number. what a loser.

"Now that that's done, would you like a quick way to the bottom?" He holds out his arm to you with a smile...bro is cheesing too much and it's hurting your fucking eyes.

Without a second thought, you take the crow off your shoulder and watch it fly into the air. "I'm good."

You stand on the railing and jump, crows circling around you. You safely are lowered to the ground as you bow and make your way out of the veil. Bro is so fucking goofy for what...you'll still give him a call though...for your ego of course.

MAHITO -

You were just hanging out at the train station when this guy sat next to you.

"...can I help you?"

You saw his hand shoot out toward you and you dodge him by jumping up, squatting on the top of the train station ceiling.

"What's up with you bro? I can't chill at the train station?"

His tongue comes out of his mouth as he licks his lips with a smile.

"This'll be fun..."

His hand touches the side of your face but nothing happens. He freezes in shock, what the hell are you?

"Aww, am I that pretty to you? Sadly, you're a bit ugly." You smack his hand off of your face, still grinning at him.

He starts to back up from you...why wasn't it working...

"Don't tell me you're scared now? Nah cuz, you wanted to bother me." You continue trekking toward him, hands in your pockets.

You cornered him against a wall, pushing your hand on his chest.

"I feel like you're gonna get yo' ass beat so I'll leave it to them. ta-ta." With that, you leave him panting against the wall.