#oh this is so strange who tf made them feel like that

[persesphonestears]

More cod incorrect quotes

A/N: There is an obvious pattern cause I used a generator lmao anyway

C/W: uh swearing? i think thats it for once

Ghost: Favourite horror movie?

Soap: It

Price: Saw

Gaz: Annabelle

R/n: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

-

Price: You're a loose cannon, Ghost.

Ghost: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Soap: I think you play by your own rules.

Gaz: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.

Price: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Ghost: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. R/n is a loose cannon.

R/n: *smashes a chair*

-

Price: Good morning.

Ghost: Good morning.

Soap: Good morning.

Gaz: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

R/n: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

-

Price: Where's Ghost, Soap, and Gaz?

R/n: They're playing hide and seek.

Price: Where?

R/n: I don't think you get how this game works.

-

Price: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Ghost: Several traffic violations.

Soap: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Gaz: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

R/n: Also, that’s not our car.

-

Price: Nothing in life is free.

Ghost: Love is free!

Soap: Adventure is free.

Gaz: Knowledge is free.

R/n: Everything is free if you take it without paying.

-

R/n: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.

Ghost: ... Your what?

R/n: My friends.

Price: Are they saying “friends”?

Gaz: I think they're being sarcastic.

Soap: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, R/n! All of your friends are in this room.

R/n: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

-

Price: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?

Gaz: Rude.

Soap: That’s fair.

Ghost: Not again.

R/n: Are you going to want this back? Or can I keep it?

-

R/n: Is having a penis fun?

Ghost: It has its ups and downs.

Soap: Sometimes it’s a little hard.

Gaz: It’s a pain in the ass.

R/n: Oh, Jesus, fuck, guys, come on.

-

Gaz: That's it, we're gonna go out and find what we need!

Price: To the city?

Gaz: Yeah, no matter what!

R/n: Well- How exactly do you propose we do that, exactly?

Gaz: I... I don't know!

Ghost: Oh come off it, be serious!

Gaz: I am serious!

Ghost: You're insane!

Soap: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved!

Everyone:

Price: What???

Soap: Or maybe it was a basset hound!

R/n: no no maybe Soap is onto something..

Ghost, panicked: YOU'RE ALL INSANE!

-

Price: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what R/n will and will not eat.

Ghost: Grass? Yes!

Price: Moss? Yes!!

Ghost: Leaves? Ohh, yes!

Price: Shoelaces? Strange but true!

Ghost: Worms? Sometimes!

Price: Rocks? Usually not.

Ghost: Twigs? Usually!

Price: Soap's cooking? Inconclusive!

Gaz: How did you… test this?

Price: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it.

Gaz: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.

Soap: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

-

Price: Are we really going to let R/n keep the cat?

Gaz: Hey we kept R/n.

-

Price: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Ghost: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Price: Three of us saw it, Ghost. How do you explain that?

Ghost: *points at Soap* Sleep deprivation. *points at Gaz* Paranoia. *points at R/n* Delusional personality disorder.

-

Price, trying to convince R/n to join the task force: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone alongside us who's really... smart!

Gaz: And loud!

Soap: And grumpy!

Ghost: And oblivious to reality

R/n:

-

Price: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!

Gaz: Tubular AF!

Soap: Mood to the max!

Ghost, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.

R/n, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

Price: Tf

-

Price: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life

Ghost: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years

Soap: Oh wow, my innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Gaz: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

R/n: My entire childhood and happiness, is that you?

Price:

Price: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?

-

Price: What does 'take out' mean?

Soap: Food

Gaz: Dating

Ghost: Murder.

R/n: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A LIL BITCH.

-

Price: Anyone d-

Ghost: Depressed?

Gaz: Drained?

Soap: Dumb?

R/n: Done with life?

Price: -done with their work... need to get Laswell to get you all therapy …

-

Price: So uhhh... question: my ‘friend’ keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked...

Gaz: I would hope they're not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!

Soap: In your pantry!

Price: Yeah... and eating them raw, and they keep calling them 'chips'. ... How do I make them stop?

Ghost: Is your friend here?

Price, motioning to R/n: Yeah.

Gaz, to R/n: You're a monster! Words MEAN things! >:(

Soap: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab em out of and chew-

Soap: HOLD ON. WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AFTER THAT MISSION?!

Soap: NO, STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN

Everyone else: No.

Soap, to Gaz and R/n: YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS

Gaz: YAAAAAAAAY!

R/n: THE PRESTIGE!

-

Price: What did you guys get in your yearbook?

Gaz: 'Prettiest Smile'

Soap: 'Nicest Personality'

Ghost: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'

R/n: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'

-

Price: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?

Soap: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies

R/n: Socks are Feetie Heaties

Gaz: Forks are Stabby Grabbies

Soap: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties

R/n: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies

Gaz: Stamps are Lickie Stickies

Ghost, annoyed: You are disappointments

Price to Ghost: You agreed to join the team.

-

Soap: I’m an idiot.

Ghost:

Price:

Gaz:

R/n:

Soap:

R/n: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

This stupid long omg, uh anyway I used a incorrect quote generator cause I'm lazy but edited most of them so the make some more sense :>

[eldritch-spouse]

lmao Vesper 😭😭😭

Ok wait for me I have new genius idea for crackass scapegoat!AU

Reader is the poor employee with a curse of being a magnet for Icons. They're trying their best, applying for the jobs in the most "human" spaces – but it's useless to try, it's only matter of time when they're meeting face to face with something very huge and demonic. They're not even trying, really. They're not even at some high position. They're just too unlucky to being the one who listens to all complaints and death threats... yet still very lucky to somehow remain alive after that.

After being kicked out from the theatre, their first honest job, they're totally broke. Underground casino? Yeah, yeah, shady. Sign them up!

Work is actually not so bad until some strange green giant scolds the shit out of them for "playing cheap" and almost brings them to that hot shithole– good thing he got distracted and the only thing poor employee lost are all their money and a job.

Damn, here we go again- Nothing could be wrong with working in a popular restaurant, yeah? Everyone gone through it-

Oh, how lucky they're to stay alive after that day when enormous snake woman decided to visit their modest establishment of a workplace. Their coworker, fellow waiter, is not so lucky tho. Poor Kenny.

With a generous amount of trauma, our scapegoat is escaping to something- something completely different, you know? They got a jackpot! Luck is TOTALLY on their side after all this suffering, how else you can explain that they got a job in that prestigious boutique?

... Well, let's say, they haven't break in tears only because of their lack of dignity at this point. That guy was marvelous, but he almost crashed them into the pulp with all his requirements- they're not even a designer, really....

Okay, maybe, they need to take a rest. Big rest. Take their stress out somewhere. Ikea, furniture store, bed section. Peace and love.

How it's even possible to be fired from a chill place like this? Oh, that's easy. Some buff dude built like a mountain just sorta appeared and fell asleep at the one of the biggest beds- and for some reason they fell asleep on their workplace while it happened. When they woke up tho, here was no one but a broken bed and complain in the customer's book.

That's it. That's a last nerve they had. They're escaping to the amusement park, to be the clown they are and being paid for it, as they deserve.

Only to be mocked by a guy with a fucking macaroni limbs. No, here was other people too, but he brought the greatest display of mockery and dishonour ever possible. Even their destroyed dignity somehow reanimated just to get beat down again.

...

Kalymir has zero idea why he woke up with a strong desire to go on the fucking "DOTA tournament" and tf it even means, but he already hyped up and ready to crush in-

After having to gamble at the same table as the Lord of Greed and nearly losing ownership of your soul.

After working at a restaurant good enough that the Queen of Gluttony unintentionally erotically fellated your entire body and made you feel like a twinkie.

After getting your department in IKEA utterly destroyed by the King of Sloth's insistence that he nap specifically in your section.

After having the King of Pride rip into you so viciously that you only wished you had been swallowed.

After having the King of Envy out-clown you.

And now, seeing what you can only guess is the King of Wrath well on his way to likely turn you into a stain on the wall...

You think of what could have been. Before this chain of horrid luck took over your life. In that one first job where you had to confront Vesper about his tendency for "group affections"-

Maybe you really should have just taken the deal and sucked him off.

[carebeartherese]

My live reactions to Loki ep 4:

(Already 7 mins in and I’m angry with Kang)

-hell yea the clock lady wants you (what the fuck)

-mobius and Loki are very boyfriends rn

-shit the loom

-LOKI LOOKED AT MOBIUS’ HAND

-sorry

-I love this Victor timely fella tbh

-oh fuck dox

-B15 my love <333

-no don’t let dox live

-oooooo words

-Víctor is so autism

-ob and Casey <3333

-ob and victor meeting each others idles

-snake eating it’s own tail= Ouroboros

-FANGIRLING

-CASEY JEALOUS??

-mobius is so sweet

-NOT THE BIGASS SUIT THING AGAIN POOR MOBIUS

-lmfao petty ob

-hahahahah VOLUNTEER LOKI

-skin?

-mobius and Loki fighting like an old couple is my favorite

-Sylvie = third wheel

-Loki is in fact super fast

-ooop victor is think

-Casey and ob are so bf coded

-CASEY IS THE OTHER WOMAN NOW

-PIE DATE 2???

-sylvie pls let them be a couple

-dude this bitch

-CALLING OUT MOBIUS FR

-HE HASNT LOOKED CAUSE HE LOVES LOKI HE WANTS TO STAY WITH HIM

-MOBIUS AND SYLVIE FACING OFF WHILE LOKI STANDS IN THE BACKGROUND IS ACTUALLY PEAK CINEMA

-WHO WILL HE CHOOSE

-pie pls

-LOKI YOU CHOSE HER???

-oh brad

-shit

-please don’t start a prison riot

-don’t bring Galileo into this

-Stfu dox

-uhhhh this tension is strange

-B15 !!!!!!

-brad doing the same hand-resting thing with his collar

-PIE TIME

-wait sylvie gtfo

-ohhhh please let them fight about MOBIUS

-Loki monologue incoming

-lmfao Thor mocking

-also Loki character development???

-yea those people live because of his lover

-damn wise words ig

-I don’t like them as a couple please don’t let this happen again

-yea sylvie thats kinda the point of hope

-i don’t hate her she’s just annoying on occasion

-anyways

-ok but you are gods tho

-thx Loki also back tf up

-MOVE ON /SRS

-damn that pie room is the real star or the show

-fuck dox srsly

-NO NO RAVONNA STOP

-also crazy bitch Ms minutes honorable mention

-SHES WORKING ON HERSELF OK

-oh shit life on the timeline?? Fr???

-oh fuck no you crazy bitches

-WHAT ARE THEY DOING

-BRAD NO

-FUCK DONT SQUISH THEM

-NO PLEASE OMFG RAVONNA

-MS MINUTES WHY ARE YOU PSYCHOTIC

-Brad that was fuckin cold

-see even ravonna doesn’t actually give a fuck who you are brad

-Casey x OB x Timely???

-It’s hotchoc victor

-I love victor

-mobius is so supportive

-what’s happening with the tempads tho???

-oh sorry b15 it’s people goo now

-MS MINUTES STOP THIS AINT SUPPOSED TO BE HORROR

-Aw he made the guard hot coco

-OH FUCK

-BRAD WHAT THE HELL YOU CUNT

-IT WAS SO WHOLESOME UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP

-MOBIUS AND VIRUSES LMFAO

-shit Ms minutes

-stawp

-loki and mobius need more screen time together

-this feels much scarier than it should tbh

-ohhh….hey ravonna….sorry about all that

-oh shit ok

-mommy? Sorry, mommy? Sorry-

-brad please relax with your 70s hair

-TIMELY DONT BE A DICK PLS

-RUN LOKI RUN

-oh fuck this is it ig

-real Ms minutes sucks

-shits getting real

-loki is gonna get pruned by himself

-sylvie constantly plays elevator music in her soul

-this is where Loki gets pruned!!!! Probably by himself

-yup I was right prune yourself

-damn sylvie strong

-good job loki???

-sorry just had to kill past me rq

-WHOS calling???

-and th e call was coming from IsIdE tHe HoUsE

-oh dammit ob you scared me

-mobius is so worried about his boyfriend he’s willing to reboot the whole system

-LET THE LOKIS USE THEIR POWERS SRSLY

-BYE MS MINUTES

-Aw poor timely they aren’t mocking you

-OH SHIT

-you’ll never be him.

-that shit was menacing fr

-oh DONT send brad out on his own!!!

-he gonna die

-fuck that was kinda hot ngl

-anyways hi sylvie/brad

-FUCK YEA SCREW YOU RAVONNA

-lokius has had way too few scenes today

-loki <333

-oh thank god

-OH THERE IS NO GOD

-THE LOOM

-oh loki please be safe

-don’t send timely out pls

-no dont!!!

-TIMELY PLS DONT DIE

-OH SHIT BLACK HOLE SPAGHETTI

-NO TIMELY PLEASE

-GOD HOW FIX PLS

-NO BAD LOKI

-STAY PUT PLEASE

-DUDE

-THIS SHIT IS TERRIFYING

-B15 MY LOVE

-OH FUCK WHY IS IT DARK

-WHAT THE HELL WHAT JUST HAPPENED

-THAT IS AN UNFAIR CLIFFHANGER

-COME BACK

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Can I please request Ivy, Goldmary, and Alear(because I always have to include Pepsi chan in my requests, you write her too well) with a faceless changeling S/O who's love language is turning into the character?

Like they love them so much, they feel the most comfortable as them. I think that'd be neat

(FE: Engage) Ivy, Goldmary, and Alear with a shapeshifting S/O

NGL I'd be freaked tf OUT if I saw that. And thank you for the kind words about Alear! When it comes to Fire Emblem characters, I feel obligated to make sure they're in-character as possible. It'd be an insult to my love for the series to do any less.

Ivy was startled when S/O first changed shapes right in front of her.

Truth be told, she felt she should be a little less surprised, considering what was in this world already. Gods, heroes from another world, magic.

Yet here she was, shocked by the fact there was a shapeshifter.

Ivy didn't mind S/O being a changeling, though she was curious as to what they looked like naturally.

What she did mind was the fact another Ivy was next to her as they were cuddling.

(Ivy) "...S/O."

(Ivy?) "Yes?"

(Ivy) "I...I understand that you're comfortable with me, to the point you are me...Um...How do I put this?"

The fact the other Ivy was tilting their head so curiously, something she would never do was throwing her completely off.

(Ivy) "It's strange. As if I'm staring into a mirror that is not mimicking my own actions."

(Ivy?) "Sorry, I can change if you wa-"

(Ivy) "No, please. I am quite flattered that you even want to turn into me it's...please keep this between us. I do not need Somniel screaming in terror from a second me."

(Ivy?) "Ha, alright."

She didn't mention it, but she also felt quite self conscious.

Was her chest that big...?

(Goldmary) "Why, it's no shock that you decided to transform into perfection!"

The other Goldmary began pouting.

(Goldmary?) "That is not why I changed into you, Goldmary..."

It was honestly a bit jarring for her doppleganger to sound exactly like her, but have their manner of speech to be completely off.

(Goldmary) "Who can blame you? I am quite beautiful!"

Goldmary becomes extremely happy whenever S/O transforms into her. Imitation is the greatest sign of flattery, after all!

And she had no idea she was so comfortable to snuggle into!

And so beautiful when she was smiling too!

Author's note: I can only write Goldmary admiring herself before an ego singularity forms and swallows this post whole, this whole bit goes on for a while, you get the idea.

(Alear) "Huh...that's what I look like?"

(Alear?) "Beautiful? Yes, yes you do look like that!"

Alear giggled sheepishly, her hand covering her mouth.

(Alear) "It's a little weird, hearing my own voice say that. But...thank you. Are you sure you're alright with this though?"

(Alear?) "Of course! I choose who I transform into, and I chose you for a reason!"

The other Alear gave her a peck on the cheek. While the gesture was quite affectionate and made her heart flutter, it was still really weird.

(Alear) "Thanks, it means a lot to me, and to you I'm sure. Someday, I want to see your true form, you know. That's who I love the most, after all."

The other Alear now shared her same blushing smile.

(Alear?) "Hah, you're such a smoothtalker...!"

Marth materialized next to the real Alear, eyeing the situation currently unfolding.

(Marth) "Wow, this is a confusing sight."

(Alear?) "You know who the real one is, right Marth?"

(Marth) "Yes, but it's like I'm seeing Alear speak into the mirror. Thank goodness she isn't actually like this by herself..."

(Alear) "Hah, I couldn't imagine...I am quite dashing though, don't you think me?"

(Alear?) "Why yes, yes you are!"

Marth playfully rolled his eyes as he disappeared, both Alear's laughing at their antics.

(Alear) "Oh! This should go without saying, but don't let Vander, Framme, or Clanne see us like this. I think they'd begin frothing at the mouth if they saw two of me."

(Alear?) "...Oh gods, I didn't even think of that. Where do we even go? People would be confused if they saw two Divine Dragons!"

(Alear) "...Maybe this isn't such a good idea."

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight - Too Fine Too Be Normal

@lexosaurus @hannahmanderr @zombiemerlin

When outsiders have to deal with any member of the weirdo trio it really is best to just roll with the punches. Plus, Orson actually LIKES his techy internet buddy; so what if he’s some kind of superhero pharaoh or something?

Orson blinks at his screen, not for the first time feeling confused and baffled over TooFine’s chat comments.

TooFine: brb gotta go eat a bat, nightshade found the plant paint I covered her fruit tree in

He’s assuming what the guy means is that ‘nightshade’, TooFine’s friend, is trying to hit him with a baseball bat. Strange and extreme but at least this time he’s not claiming to have ‘accidentally fallen into another dimension’. Whenever TooFine leaves suddenly it’s always wildy outlandish stories. Certainly there’s no way he thinks Orson actually believes them right? Yes it was very funny anyways. Reading TF’s impressive imagination always made him feel a little better about life, like even if your life is simple and plain you can bring some crazy into it with your mind.

Sometimes though, it’s clear he’s actually telling the truth, like that one time they were on voice chat and Orson dad popped in to try and convince him to let him teach him how to hunt again, Orson liked meat but he had zero desire to actually go and kill things. But TF started talking guns too, apparently that thing about TF’s in person friend having parents who made weapons was very much true. TF impressed Orson’s dad, meaning his dad now approved of the friendship. At least TF didn’t bring up that ‘ectoplasm’ stuff while his dad was around, the last thing Orson wanted was his dad thinking all his online friends were crazy too. His dad definitely didn’t believe the claim that TF’s friends parents also had a modified military vehicle they used on the actual road; something about how military treads can’t be used on roads because they’re too damaging. TF followed that up with ‘our roads can withstand some pretty heavy artillery’, Orson’s chuckle and eye roll probably convinced his dad that TF was screwing around with him a little.

Either way, hopefully TF gets back in time to keep helping him with this stupid drone he’s trying to build. He’d love to be able to go get the mail without having to actually go outside, so much wasted effort when he’d rather be gaming or reading. Then he gets a voice chat request, the voice that comes through is not TF’s

“Oh shit hey, you actually picked up, wow I can’t believe he made an outsider friend. Weird”, this new teen clears his throat, “okay so, Nightshade actually might have knocked him out in a fit of rage? So he’ll be a bit- hey! No! Put that down! You don’t get to hit him again just because I’m protecting his PDA!”.

TF actually used a PDA? Such old tech? Why? Weird.

“Emilie is PINK! PINK!”.

The boy teen groans, “ugh. Goths. Anyway, while he’s out, he give you any ideas for a good birthday gift? I’ve been banned from giving him weapons or explosives, and the last time I got him a souped up hard drive he hacked the federal government and filed the presidents taxes for some insane reason”.

Orson blinks, “I think he’s been talking a lot about electric cars and electric bikes? What happened after he… did the presidents taxes?”. He really just wants to know where this guy was going to take that level of bullshit.

“I’d rather ideas that don’t require me to steal my rich arch enemy uncles credit card. And eh, nothing much, just got abducted by some secret service folks up into the Appalachian mountains for some ‘one on one’ talks time. He got some new wicked scars out of it even, one looks like a hockey stick! I don’t even have one like that yet! But hey, what’s life without a few abductions here and there? The gov loves shooting me!”.

Orson makes a face, alright so were TF’s friends just as bad as him? Shaking his head, “get him a lock picking kit then, in case anyone abducts him with handcuffs or something”. What the actual hell? He absolutely has to google this.

“Oh that’s not bad-oh hey buddy! You good? No lumps and bumps? No booboos or owies?”.

“You jerk, I’m fine. Why is she still armed!”.

“Emile. Is. PINK”.

“It suits her!”.

“She’s a black apple tree! Pink is never her colour!”.

Oh so the goth did actually name her plants, odd but not insane. And yeah, a hacker did actually do the presidents taxes… weird. There’s no way that was actually TF right? Was he friends with an actual hacker?

“Oh T I totally voice called, or whatever, your online buddy? It seemed like the chat was recent and shit so you know”.

“Man, you are way too overprotective and way too much of a mother hen for a dead guy. Gimme that”.

“Hey at least dead hens can shoot laser beams out of their mouths, way cooler than living ones”.

TF clearly has his… PDA back, “you’re still working on that ‘let me be lazy’ drone right?”.

Orson blinks, “yes, but real talk, did you actually file the presidents taxes?”.

“Oh my zone! DP you shit head! Ugh, look the guy was trying to embezzle my towns funding to buy another yacht, so I figured hey why not forcibly report all his off shore accounts and that weird charity donation to a Russian network. I also might have gone after all his staff too? They weren’t impressed but I call anarchy and how was I supposed to know his people would actually not suck at tracking people?”.

“T, dude, I’m pretty sure the federal government and the goddamn president have better tracking than those G.I.W. morons”.

“Are you going to fix Emilie or what!”.

“Never”.

Orson flips through google results a little more and yeah, a ton of people got hacked for taxes… Hell Orson even stumbles on a whistle blower data leak about ties to Russia that he nopes out of real quick. “TF bud, that’s super concerning”.

“Heh. Fair enough and- oh shit!”. There’s an actual explosion over the line. “Hey, you wanna actually witness shit for a change, because good goddamn. DP! Have you been skipping sleep again! Why is the goddamn sleep god throwing a building at us!”.

What.

You know what.

Fuck it.

Orson sends the zoom invite, it’s accepted immediately. It’s actual pure chaos. There’s shouting, what looks like a sentient star cover blank wearing a mask in the sky, a glowing black and white teen throwing actual everything forbid bath bombs at the thing in the sky. TF looks like he’s from freaking ancient Egypt, with a helm on and everything. Then a bunch of glowing vines shove TF out of screen, a girl in a green and black body suit with a freaking cape chasing after.

For a second he’s wondering if TF is playing a massive prank on him and somehow created a hyper realistic superhero show set up. The… PDA is pointed up at the sky as the voice of the guy who started the voice chat shouts, “I HAVE MIDTERMS! WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO!”.

The blanket creature shouting back, “SLEEP!”.

“Oh yeah I guess I should have seen that one coming”.

Okay so. TF’s friend, whose parents make weapons, is a superhero or something? Google to the rescue.

TF shouts, “why are you stabbing me! There’s a god in the sky! Fight him!”.

“Naw, UnderGrowth actually likes Nocturne, since sleeping humans aren’t actively polluting Mother Nature”.

“Fuck that stupid grass stain”.

“I’m going to end you”.

Orson blinks at his phone, DP, Danny Phantom. A real person, in a real town, that looked like a real superhero. It’s that rumoured haunted town actually, a real haunted town. What the actual hell? Is he friends with a superhero or sidekick? Who’s also a hacker? And eats a concerning amount of meat without getting sick somehow? Has all the stories he’s been getting, and not reacting strongly too, been real??? Alright, okay, gotta play it cool self. He probably actually thought Orson was taking him seriously and has decided that Orson passed some kind of weirdness meter test. This was basically almost an identity reveal wasn’t it? Holy crap he’s involved in a real life comic book secret identity reveal.

The ‘Nocturne’ guy gets blasted into a wall, DP pelting It with eggs he got from somewhere. The Nocturne holding up a massive canister over Its head, “YOU WILL FAIL IF YOU DO NOT SLEEP!”.

“Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit”, TF comes sorta back on screen, grabbing up his PDA, the ‘facial markings’ don’t look like make up, it looks like it’s part of his skin. “Okay okay, so that right up there is a massive thing of halothane vapour from the looks of it, fun. So we’re all probably gonna pass out here, feel free to disconnect if shit gets boring”.

Orson squeaks a little, “boring? You get up to some insane shit. Why is a… sleep god? Trying to knock y’all out?”. Roll with the punches, gotta roll with the punches. Freak out later.

TF snickers, “DP doesn’t get enough sleep and has been frustrating this ghost since he formed. God’s am I right? Ha!”.

“Get back here you!”.

“Oh for crying out loud! I’ll fix your freaking plant okay! Ugh!”. TF gets smacked into a wall all by the plant girl anyways.

Orson eyes the parts of his drone before looking back to the screen, “why are you helping a random friend you made, build a drone when this crap is going on?”. Because it seriously has to be asked.

TF uses sand to push himself out of the wall rubble, “eh, normalicy is nice and shit, plus you’re impressively chill. I bring up sneaking into a death gods liquor cabinet and you just give me a ‘that’s nice, have fun. Don’t hospitalise yourself’. Sure, Red’s chill but she’s more DP’s friend”, smirking, “and his ex, plus she rides a hoverboard and shoots ghosts so…”.

Oh okay, so there’s a fourth one. This is completely insane. Whelp. Guess he’s in it now though. Orson shrugging, “I’ve always been a pretty laid back guy, though this is definitely the craziest thing I’ve seen. Way worse than that chic on drugs or something who was trying to bite people”.

“Oh yeah drugs are bad, way worse than hacking regardless what the government has to say about it”.

Then the canister explodes, giving Orson a serious anxiety spike as bits of metal impale in things and gas starts going everywhere. DP actually does a comedic salute in the air before just falling to the ground. The Nocturne guy looks very pleased with Itself and actually wraps around the probably unconscious teen, hissing at the plant girl when she tries to approach.

TF cringing, “stupid obsessive ghosts. DP looks like he’s been bent like a shrimp”, TF moving his PDA camera and yeah the black and white teens position is kinda shrimp like.

All Orson can think to say is, “great, now I’m hungry”.

TF laughing while hurling a fist full of sand, “HA! Yeah sushi would be great right now”.

“You disgust me”.

“NONE SHALL DISTURB HIS SLUMBER!”.

Was it normal for ‘villains’ to seemingly baby heroes? Because that’s what this looks like. Nocturne literally just wants the black and white teen to sleep, that’s it. Weird. And then freaking pillow monsters??? Start storming the screen, TF and Nightshade/plant girl doing battle with them. The zoom gets cut out so Orson is just going to assume the device got broke.

…

Okay.

So.

That happened.

One question, well many really, but why is someone so tech focused going with a freaking Egyptian theme? Nightshade made sense, he’s pretty sure even her ‘code name’ is actually a plant. And DP was, well, a literal ghost so the Phantom name made sense. Weird that ghosts were actually real still. Yes he’s seen some stuff about them on the news occasionally but it still seemed so far fetched. And he’s pretty sure he saw some people dressed up as DP at last years comic con.

Weird.

Very weird.

Well. Nothing for it now. So he sends TF a message asking if he’s good. It takes multiple hours but….

TooFine: we’re good, DP’s still out cold and has been abducted into a sleep gods lair but like, we good. Sleepy Blanket won’t try to skin him like some people.

OriOri: that’s good? I mean, his skin would probably make a poor blanket?

TooFine: HA! Thats the kinda joke DP would make! He’ll be proud

TooFine: he’ll be proud whenever he wakes up

TooFine: and when Sleepy Blanket stops acting like a crazy dragon protecting its horde

TooFine: and when he finds his way back to the land of living

OriOri: it’ll be a while

TooFine: good. He really should sleep more

TooFine: the dumbass

OriOri: if he gets so little his pissed off god then yeah. That’s impressive actually

TooFine: you have no idea. Anyways, tots sorry for dipping on your little project. I’d offer Techy’s services as make up but he’s an idiot with newer tech

Orson has no clue who that is and isn’t going to ask.

OriOri: at this point I’m more curious why the heck you went with an Egyptian theme for a guy who hacks the federal gov and makes visual horror games

TooFine: eh, it would be kinda weird if a reincarnated pharaoh wasn’t Egyptian themed, you know how it is. Technically you don’t but you know you know

Orson sighs, this was so weird. But he is so not going to let on that he never believe the shit TF said.

OriOri: I guess? Now do you know how to better connect female usb c to an hdmi, cause it’s pissing me off

TooFine: *snort*

TooFine: but of course I do. Debendint on how far you need the connection to work you might have to bike something from scratch. I tots got blueprints and they are definitely not stolen from the fbi terror investigations unit. Definitely not.

Orson was probably going to get arrested one day because of this, but screw it, TF was fun to talk too and made his mostly boring life more interesting. Not interesting enough to ever consider moving to the guys nightmare town though. Not a chance in Hell.

End.

Prompts: Tucker fucked up. Hard. But it’s like, how the hell was he supposed to know that hacking the federal government was a bad idea? Nocturne takes a liking to Danny and decides to help teach him a lesson, whether Danny wants it or not. Outsider POV. Tucker makes a new online acquaintance, and will casually allude to the crazy shit he and his friends get up to while ghost hunting. The new acquaintance thinks Tucker is just embellishing the truth, until…

[xjustonemoremiraclex]

Ok, final thoughts on Junji Ito Maniac

It was... fine. Better than the Junji Ito Collection, for sure, though I'd argue the creepy scenes looked... well, creepier there lol Let's be honest, I think it's clear by now it's impossible to recreate Ito's artstyle, it just works a lot better on paper.

The one thing that annoyed me though is how they just... decided to stop some of the stories short? Like, I get some changes need to be made, but it almost seems like they looked at some of the stories and went 'pff who needs these last couple of pages? just throw them out'. So weird.

Anyway, some general (relatively spoiler-free) thoughts on each episode that no one cares about:

‘The Strange Hikizuri Siblings’: love how they started with some dark humor (for some definition of the word humor) to lead you into a false sense of security.

‘The Story of the Mysterious Tunnel’: meh, the original was better

‘Ice Cream Bus’: The ending fucked me up <3

‘Hanging Balloon’: a fascinating mixture of "this is so dumb" and "wait why is this also terrifying 😭", love the non-linear storytelling

‘Four x Four Walls’: another one that's more darkly humorous, it made me feel so claustrophobic jfc

‘The Sandman’s Lair’: oh look, another one that fucked me up <3

‘Intruder’: I find this one weirdly fascinating, kinda would love to know more about wtf actually happened

‘Long Hair in the Attic’: the one that made me regret watching this show, I am officially traumatized <3

‘Mold’: you could not pay me to stay in that fucking house, goodBYE sir

‘Library Vision’: again, not a super fan of the changes, but it's still pretty good. And creepy.

‘Tomb Town’: I really like this one for some reason, but the animation in that scene at the well was... questionable. And the original ending is MUCH better (imo)

‘Layers of Terror’: Oh, my mistake. NOW I'm traumatized for life <3 fuck this show why did I start watching this 😭

‘The Thing that Drifted Ashore’: my least favourite, by far. And I'm sorry, but it looked... bad. Like, really bad 😕

‘Tomie – Photo’: also titled 'the girl who can't stop making terrible decisions' jeez

‘Unendurable Labyrinth’: meh

‘The Bully’: I also really like this one and it's also disturbing as all hell <3

‘Alley’: karma is a bitch huh

‘Headless Statue’: girl for the love of god why tf would you follow his shady ass and why would you not jump out of the nearest window when given the chance 😭

‘Whispering Woman’: another one I really like, and I find it weirdly nice in a super disturbing way lol

‘Soichi’s Beloved Pet’: we stan a guy who's super passionate about animals, we don't stan a guy who fucks up a perfectly good kitty 😭

[cult-of-dollbabies]

Alright here's some thoughts on s2 ep5, spoiler warning

I had to rewatch/skim through it this morning bc the fight scene gave me such secondhand embarrassment that it literally fucked up my processing and the whole time I was like 😀 is this real.

Watching it again was fine but dear god the puppetry.. Anywho, the moments with Lexi and Nadine were my favorite by far, Nadine drawing a relation to assure Lexi she's safe to come to,, "you know how moms are, they do their best to make you happy, right?" And this is what made Lexi come out, she knows some things about neglectful mothers, and losing a parent, I think that in a way she wanted to be there for Nadine, too. They're there for each other despite hardly knowing one another, and yes Lexi seems to still have bully tendencies but I think Nadine will influence her development in being better, and especially her recovery. Nadine lightening the mood, helping her collect the pills and flush them was so tender and a huge step, if I'm being honest I shed a few tears, I love them sm (also Nadine autism real)

Love how hard it is to tell if Scout (or good chucky.. since thats rlly the name theyre settled on) is faking or not. Hes raised some red flags, he still has impeccable aim w/ blades, saying sum creepy shit in a suspiciously childlike manner, (i know this is the same as the last ep but this time it almost feels emphatic) Chucky is known for his manipulation and hiding in plain sight tactics, if it turns out it was all an act, can't say I'd be too surprised, "like I finally figured out what I'm for" was actually quite eery.

...that being said I am NOT immune to chucky manipulation this was fucking CUTE

Cant wait for Father Bryce to die, sister Catherine's the only one with sense clearly, that's all I have to say about that

I'm on Devon and lexis side but on the other hand I don't think Chucky could even pretend to be nice, let alone admit to finding god or something behind a closed door ( I fuckin lost it when he held the Bible up, ain't no way, and where'd he pull that from??) and also be willing to get baptized , personally i don't think hes faking but more like the brainwashing is wearing off.. like a ticking time bomb. I thought Jake baptizing him was strange at first but watching again it feels like he was only trying to help Scout feel better, like with a child, and we all know by now Jake is attached and using him to cope with losing his foster brother, (another scout-might-be-faking-and-manipulating-jake bit, the joker line) it's understandable, but dammit Jake please stop disregarding your boyfriends very real concerns! And Nadine definitely doesn't know what Chuckys capable of, yet, but I feel like she'll find out very soon.

the series feels more shocking than scary, and some of the humor between serious parts just feels too silly for me, I want to take it seriously but I can't

...now. About the end, boy oh boy, this is where I'm sour

Seen and had a couple ideas for who the hell Cornell was and its.. bald.. Russian chucky? Tf is that? I think they were trying to do a twist but it's .. so underwhelming. And as if he hasn't been through enough we come to find Andy's been.. getting tortured, for what we can assume to be a year, hes gotta be so broken, he doesn't know Kyle's alive, either. That is.. it's such a letdown, I'm so tired of seeing Andy be tormented, I'm not watching this to get sad, I prefer the theory that he was maiming those chuckys, at least that way he'd have some kind of payback and not another year worth of trauma. Im assuming Kyle, Glenda and Nica will try to find him and it cant happen soon enough. I actually lost sleep over this.. I'm serious, not in a fear or disturbed way either in a for the love of god just let him be happy for more than five seconds please kinda way :(

Hopefully it gets better, now I just want to see Andy be saved, not very ready to see the state he's in though..

[omnidemidisaster]

Underrated ship...Like bro- They would be a strange yet cute duo

Roy x Susie headcanons

I like to think for Roy it was a crush at first sight

Like he laid eyes on a pretty girl and instantly went "damn"

He tried to talk with her to become friends, stuttering on nearly every word

Susie didn't think much on it, just thinking he was shy

Roy did not realize that she was Pumps older sister

That was until Pump literally came up to Susie and began talking about their grandpa

Roy nearly short circuted

So he has a crush on the sister of the kid he was bullying..

After that meeting, he instantly began to be nicer to Pump...like alot nicer

Ross and Robert thought Roy was sick or something

They're right, but not in the way they think

Roy ended up ranting about Susie to them, how much he really thinks she's cute and how he wants to talk to her

And that cleared it up for the two boys

"I can't help it man, she just looks super pretty"

"And you sound like your crushing on her"

"I'm what?"

Ross and Robert are constantly in Roy's corner, but they do secretly tease him

Roy slowly gained confidence from the back up from Ross and Robert

So with that confidence, he began to actually hang out more with Susie

They even became friends

One day, Roy finally manned up and wanted to confess to her

And it goes a little something like this ( Yfm fans please get the reference lmao )

Roy gulped as he started to walk to the brown haired girl. He tried to not be nervous, but it was like telling a fish not to swim. Impossible. He tapped Susie on the shoulder, getting her attention. The taller girl turned around, a clearly nervous Roy greeting her.

"Oh, hey Roy! What's up?" Roy's head nearly went blank. "Uhm- Hey" Susie tilted her head. She never seen him this nervous before. But what made him this nervous?

Roy sighed and decided that he might as well confess now than never. "So, you know how we're...friends?" Susie nodded, wondering what he is trying to get at.

"Yea? Why? Do you not want to be friends anymore?" Susie asked, a little nervous if that was the case. "No no no! No, I love being friends. Its just..."

Roy looked down at his shoes. "I think I like you much more than a friend" Roy admitted. He had his eyes closed, expecting anything and everything negative.

Susie's cheeks turned pink. Well it was a lot better than being told what she previously thought.

"Roy. Its okay" She started. "If anything, your not alone on this" Roy looked back up, seeing a blushful Susie. Her cheeks were pink and her smile was warm and genuine. "A-Are you serious?"

Susie nodded, chuckling a little. "Heh, yeah. I thought it would of been a little obvious by now" It felt like a weight was lifted off Roy's chest.

Without thinking, Roy instantly hugged Susie. Susie was startled a little, but she laughed at his response. Her chin rested on Roy's head and she tried to hug him back to the best of her ability.

So now for the actual headcanons

Roy short. Susie tall. Height difference.

Roy is more boyish. Susie is alot more feminine. Also opposites attract.

Roy would definitely just play tf outta Susie's hair

Just constantly brushing and styling and just touching her hair

Susie doesn't mind. She finds it adorable if anything

Roy invites her to hang out with the hatzgang if she's okay with it

He kinda wants her to join but he feels as if he's going to be teased for it

Spoiler, he wouldn't get teased

Nonetheless, he did give her one of his caps which she wears all the time

Susie is super sweet to Roy

Tbh I think she's the only one who made Roy genuinely shy

And honestly Shy Roy is adorable

They would totally share milkshakes or slushies together

Roy likes to join her streams and is constantly supporting her

They would definitely vent about their homelife. Honestly why wouldn't they?

Roy has the uncle situation, a constantly working mom, and a dad who's barely there for life

Susie has parents that are somewhere other than home and lives with her brother that constantly puts himself at risk and a grandpa who could collapse at any moment

Yknow family trauma 🥰

But fr tho, they do end up feeling better after talking about their issues

Even though Susie has made Roy a nicer person, Roy is still a little shit

What I mean by that is he loves to tease and joke with her

Basically doing things like pulling harmless pranks and teasing her for stupid stuff

Nothing to make her mad mad, just enough to make her annoyed

He does it out of love...and being a little jerkface

Susie likes to make little drawings of whatever and just giving them to Roy

Just seeing Roy open up a little piece of paper with a cartoon devil she drew and smiling about it makes her heart skip a beat

Honestly they should just be canon

[aqueeracademic]

morse being queer (and other commentary) pt 17:

season 5, episode 1, “Muse”:

note: this episode deals with some really dark topics; i don’t really get into it in this post but be wary of the content

- okay season 5‼️‼️

- let’s get gay

- this guy seems a little young to be a professor

- oh he isn’t a professor he’s just some guy

- i want to live in a windmill tbh

- strange playing the trombone agenda!

- pause did morse not move to london?

- me when i have no clue what’s going on

- DETECTIVE SERGEANT?????? ULTIMATE PAUSE

- HE PASSED HIS SERGEANTS

- shit i guess he stayed

- living with strange! besties 4 lyfe

- these umbrellas are doing nothing to keep them dry

- the way debryn is giving his analysis directly to morse 🥰🥰🥰

- bro knows morse is the only one who’s gonna pay attention tbh

- about WHAT morse situation 🤨🤨🤨🤨

- i love frazil she’s always rooting for morse

- hello who tf is that

- george fancy

- WAIT

- i cant experience the george fancy story again.

- can’t handle it.

- “i’m used to working alone, sir.”

- no ur not morse u just miss jakes

- WHAT. SITUATION.

- oh

- okay

- so they’re just not gonna move him 🙄

- made me panic for no good damn reason

- morse is so disrespectful to fancy and for what

- “what’s a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?” “my job.” 😐

- i forgot i also hated fancy for a long time

- morse was right ‼️

- “hard to get, eh?” why don’t you! shut your mouth!

- “you have no idea.” “i like a challenge.”

- WHY DONT YOU! shut up ❤️

- in fairness morse was really upfront with george about his expectations so after a certain point it’s george’s fault for being a dumbass and annoying him

- that’s just me tho!

- okay ew i did not need to see debryn pull that spike out of the dudes ear

- i am experiencing debilitating heart burn right now i think im gonna die

- anywho

- thursday just roasting the shit out of nero while morse stands there like 😮

- JOAN ‼️‼️‼️

- omg she’s back

- morse is so awkward 🙄

- morse is just… drinking milk. just a glass of milk. like 🥛. im disgusted

- ayo

- body took me by surprise to say the least

- morse is getting awfully comfortable looking at dead people

- i feel like fancy is already a lot like jakes and that’s what’s irritating morse

- he keeps asking questions the same way jakes did

- it’s different though because fancy is asking because hes ignorant, not because he’s challenging morse

- and morse is irritated because jakes was an intellectual challenge

- he had to be certain before presenting anything to jakes because jakes would ask questions to force him to prove it or think it through all the way

- fancy isn’t challenging him intellectually even though he’s taking jakes’ spot

- and morse doesn’t want a replacement he just wants jakes

- ykwim??????????????

- great!

- moving on

- “dipped his quill in any ink pot.”

- bro was a whore

- i’m also assuming he was a lil…. fruity

- but don’t ask me for proof! i operate on vibes and vibes alone

- the way i thought that glider was small 💀💀

- it was literally carrying around an entire human being

- “i don’t think she likes men.” “maybe it’s just you she doesn’t like.”

- morse is SO catty i love him

- he clocked that guy as a scumbag and just ran w it

- IM DYING at morse saying what shade the lipstick is and debryn instantly knowing the line it’s from

- that’s a little 💅

- i’m just saying

- for this time period?

- also the silence after he says it 💀

- and morse just carries on 💀

- i love debryn

- george is doing his best tho

- morse just misses jakes and doesn’t want someone else hanging around and i’m SICK OVER IT

- morse watched that entire strip show and for what 😐

- you could have just gone straight to the dressing room babes

- the way he doesn’t check her out ONCE when she stands up

- respect 😔✊

- i’m watching this on amazon and the amount of times the captioning has said [inaudible] is killing me

- AYO eve is gorgeous

- i know that’s the point but like goddam 😭

- “he’d seen me dancing.” “stripping.”

- morse ur being annoying

- they’re dancers whether or not they take clothes off and ur stripping them of their dignity by belittling their careers

- there’s 0 reason to slut shame them for dancing even if it is stripping

- don’t be a dick ‼️

- naur why was morse the one to uncover the body 🥺

- i literally hate him and then immediately feel terrible for him and love him again 🙄

- i’m weak what can i say

- the way morse looks at trewlove during the interrogation and she’s just like 😳

- girl didn’t want to know a singular thing about morse’s sex life

- straight up trapped

- i’m honestly confused how fancy forgot to get the contents booked

- like you went to do it right away

- did you just?? stop? doing it???

- and then morse just covers for him to thursday to keep him in everyone’s good graces

- he’s sooooooo

- ugh.

- if there’s an opportunity to be self sacrificing he’s gonna take it and i hate it

- because being self sacrificing IS the example he sets fancy

- and we all know how that ends up

- i love it when morse is alone in the nick and opera music is playing

- it makes me think that it’s playing in his mind

- like he is constantly hearing opera when he’s working even if it’s not playing

- he’s just hearing it

- i love it

- a touch of the tism perhaps…

- ^me projecting

- that student that morse keeps talking to about the life model? the one w the blonde fringe? yeah! he’s gay.

- once again, no proof. vibes and vibes alone!

- GO CASS GO!

- out ur husband as a con artist!

- werk

- ooo dr croxley is gay for sure

- i’m so low on actual queer content from this show rn i’m just assuming every single side character is gay

- “i beg your pardon?” “you can beg my fat ass!”

- ROAST HIM FRED!!

- get his ass

- thursday has absolutely zero reservations about this shit i love him

- this is reminding me of the riot club tbh

- idk if any of you have seen that movie but the group of men behave just like the riot club

- morse giving a theory out and then bright going “and the rest?” and him being like 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ is SO REAL

- some of these episodes have so many characters, and i am so bad with names, i’ll get to the like one hour mark and have no idea who anyone is talking about anymore

- joan and thursday speaking for the first time in like a year is… hmmm

- she used to be such a daddy’s girl and now she hates his guts i am WRECKED

- dhmu 😔💔

- “that was quick.” “you asked for it.” “you’re a good sergeant, jim. good man, too.”

- you tell him thursday!

- me when i’m a jim strange STAN

- i’m nervous why is the music so scary

- oh literally nothing happened

- she just invited him inside

- he’s gonna sleep w her huh? 🙄

- he’s a slut

- i read the books! i know!

- “save it for your clients. i’m immune.”

- first of all, morse, we ALL KNOW that that isn’t true 🤨 no need to lie 😐

- “you’ve got need coming off you like a junkie gouging for a spike, but you won’t do anything about it.”

- this line is ABSOLUTELY INSANE i’m going feral

- like why would you say that 😭😭😭😭

- oh my god his face while she’s offering herself to him is so 😧

- i can’t do this tonight ✋😁

- the way he backs away from her when he starts to figure her out

- he’s so scared

- all the time!

- i hate it here

- sidebar:

- this is literally the plot of the riot club

- like what happened to the women and how the men behave and the fact that the men were scholars and it’s an elite group and they all call each other by different names

- it’s literally the riot club

- a movie i HATED and did not finish btw

- this is open riot club slander that movie was terrible

- feel free to watch it if you don’t believe me tho!

- but anyways this feels like the aftermath of that movie

- these girls are right and should be allowed to get away with it tho

- morse should have just pretended to never figure it out and let her get away with it

- i erased this episode from my memory this shit is so hard to watch

- justice for ruth astor.

- i’m sobbing my eyes out right now! literally sobbing.

- morse slut shames these girls the entire episode and then feels terrible at the end as he fucking should

- i hate men.

- just throwing in the death of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at the end????

- like hello?

- idk if that’s supposed to feel random but it certainly does

- ok that episode traumatized me

- on to the next!

[ofhedgehogsandpumpkins]

A bunch of ramblings about personal stuff with regards to my own identity as 'human' or not follows. Wanted to get in on paper somewhere and was like "Hey, I have a blog," so. It's personal, but it's my (our) blog I get to post rambling personal posts if I wanna.

Today marks my (Quinn) second run-in w/ Something hitting the rat choir of yearning (good post) (technically like the umpteenth but in this case second) that made me go "Hm, am I a therian," stuff. We're no strangers to non-/alter-humans as a system, there's a wolf, a pair of dragons, and a couple other 'unclassified' folks, but y'know.

I've always kinda been the "token human"? In the past I've (semi-jokingly) used the phrase 'species nonconforming', I've just kinda bounced around from 'sona to 'sona pretty regularly (with a rough base in puppyesque vibes for a lot of reasons), but it's always been a role to play or mask to wear for fun. Y'know, typical furry stuff.

Then I read Taxxon's HRT fic (some of the others had read it before, but I ran into it myself later) like 2 months ago and that slapped the aforementioned rat choir into singing their familiar tune, and uh. I got stuck as a dog for like, a week.

So that was fun.

By which I mean terrifying, actually! For a lot of reasons! I'm really bad at introspection actually! But I tried to settle in as best as I could and when it passed I kinda breathed a sigh of relief and moved on. Went back to the, y'know, "have fun with it" vibe and kept going. Canid-specific 'sona's and roles were kinda poisoned a little by the experience, unfortunately, but it happens. Kobolds are where it's at anyway.

And then Last Night. A very good piece of art by ayviearttv here on Tumblr was passed to me (it's a series, go to their blog it's REALLY good). And uh. Oh Boy the Rat Choir. The night soured for unrelated reasons but a solid amount of it was "Why won't these tiny cheesebrains stop singing for like 5 minutes."

Like, they sing a lot is the thing. Not like, constantly, but a lot, in response to a lot of things that I won't detail. A few include like, specific depictions of androids, or organics becoming androids, etc., messy TF (ie; semi-realistic like in the case of Taxxon and Ayvie's pieces) both organic and mechanical, and so on. We/I have also been into dragons since, like, a super young age (raised on Dragonology, fantasized about being one, raised on Animorphs which also explains a lot, never read Pern but did read Eragon, etc.) so, y'know.

...I'm saying this like I'm trying to justify it. I guess I have to, to myself, a little. Not..."have to" but...feel the need to? I woke up this morning (like 12 hours ago) feeling like I had phantom limbs, they're still around when I'm not otherwise distracted (ADHD makes a lot of things go away when I'm distracted) and have been...odd to deal with. I've never been more aware of how dirty floors can be when it feels like a part of me is dragging on them, ha.

It doesn't feel scary. I mean, I'm anxious, a little. Moreso earlier. I'm anxious in the same way, the imposter way, the faking for attention way, so on, the ways that are usually externally motivated (or at least pretend to be). But unlike before I'm not...bone-deep terrified of it. It feels nice. Wings at my back, tail balancing me out, the strange feeling of horns and crest above, it's...I'unno. It's nice.

On the other hand, I miss being able to lay on my back without feeling weird, hah. Also I was basically sprinting out of the car whenever we stopped for errands.

My proprioception's (the sense of where your body is in space) always been kinda fluid and easy to fool, even for a human who developed a fluid proprioception to handle tool use (that's why tools and/or vehicles often feel like a part of your body when you use them and you (generally) know where in space they are even without looking). Like, as a kid I found a tarot book in our grandmother's workspace that had advice for developing proprioceptive wings through meditation (not joking) and that worked pretty well for me, among other things. It's just how I am. So we'll see, uh, how long this sticks around, I guess.

If...it doesn't...no harm. Mm...maybe a little harm. I'll be sad. I think I'd miss it now that I know how it feels. If it does, work's gonna be awkward, hah. They don't make chairs for that. It'll be fine, just funny.

I don't need advice or anything, to be clear, just musing. I like hearing about the experiences of other therians in specific/alterhumans in general. It's neat. Plurality was neat too, and then turns out I was we. Regardless, it's neat, so I guess I'm just putting this out there to have on paper, and if anyone reads it and it makes them think a little about themselves or encourages anyone or whatever, that's an added bonus.

[angeltiique]

OH MY GOD.

i just realised.

this is my blog.

i can do whatever i want.

so heres a giant fucking ramble with as many thoughts on Shenggou Ye as i can manage (who if you dont know is an oc belonging to my wonderful best friend reese aka rai aka rai.diate and her story universe Liar Liar Chaos Fire 😁 she doesnt know im doing this, this is for me):

if you dont know how did you NOT know shenggou ye accidentally became a biiiiiiit of a hyperfixation for me (exaggerating). reese and i can't exactly pinpoint when it started but we think its around the time we started a zombie apocolypse roleplay with us two and another friend <3

i love him so much i daydream and fantasise about him every moment i get. i see the colour red, or a wild dog or hyena, something to do with kung fu, or any obscure thing that i manage to tie him to and i go absolutely FERAL. hyenas are now my favourite animal because of him. i see a ricecooker and laugh at how he loves rice because his asian ass is so goofy (just like me fr). i love the colours red and teal which are his main colours. my favourite songs are loose cannon by set it off and mama by mcr which are his songs. he is TAKING OVER MY LIFE /POS

i feel bad that i dont get like this with other characters, especially my other friends and even my OWN, but thats just what ended up happening and i cannot seem to control myself lol

i even made up a list of why i kin him do you want to see it well too bad youre seeing it anyway i told you this is a megapost megalist mega fuckfest okay not a fuckfest but you get the idea:

SHENGGOU KIN MOMENTS:

- large hearts, both literally and metaphorically

- imposter syndrome (self-doubt, feeling like a fraud/liar)

- scared of being disowned/losing loved ones

- making jokes during serious moments (struggling to cope so makes light of the situation = ends up brushing it off/ignoring it)

- loving our best friend from high school fr fr /gen /pl and being so excited when we see them <3

- saying fucky ass and baybee (im the reason he says it LMAOOO)

- gayass motherfuckers (both bi)

- WE BOTH HAVE PUSSIES LMAOOOO and we aren't really dysphoric about it hell yeah (im trans and sheng is intersex 💪)

- lying lying chaos crying (i know a lot of them lie but shhhhhh)

- not being good at voice regulation/shutting the fuck up LMAO (apparently its a sign of autism... shenggou ye autism real!!? /j)

- having silly laughs <3 idk my mama makes fun of my laughs and he has a silly laugh it counts sshhhh

- he probably sits on surfaces weirdly or on places you wouldn't normally sit on, and i sit weirdly so YEAH

- sex jokes? yes please (they are funny !!!)

- dramatic as hell but its because we are silly goofy

- annoying as fuck but its slash pos

and thats all i had but theres probably more in fact im doing things because he does them, like saying "L" LMAOO BUT i mean it in an endearing way 🫶

ive also been calling my mother mama a LOT more like thats WHAT ive been calling her exclusively and i know for a fact its because shenggou calls HIS MOTHER mama and the song mama by mcr again. tsk tsk this hyperfixation is legit taking over. but i love it so much.

hes all i want to daydream about. we (friends and i) have a running joke that he is my husband, i love calling him my dearest darling husband shenggou ye. its great. but i like thinking about him with me during the day, maybe doing something stupid or dangerous and laughing at him, him helping me calm tf down when im stressed. its a weird coping mechanism but strangely effective!! i prefer keeping to myself but thinking about him with me makes me feel more seen and heard and loved. and reese is a bit like him, so its also like having my best friend with me even if shes not really. i like to think i can tell shenggou anything because thats how i feel about her. again, its all really stupid and cringe but its really nice and fun

im only now realising this is probably just turning a friends oc into a para. or like. something like a para. i mean the daydreams do get vivid.. Huh!

anyway thats about all i feel like sharing, i dont expect anyone to see this like all my other posts, i just enjoy screaming into the void and seeing if anyone screams back. let it be known, having weird coping mechanisms is cool and youre so.valid. /gen biggest hugest thank you to my bestie reese for creating this goober i am obsessed with. without her art that captures his handsomeness and her writing that demonstrates his personality i would never have fallen so deeply in love with him to the point of delusion.

Now if you'll Excuse me. i am going to dream the Best dreams (shenggou will be in it). thank you and Goodnight ^_^

[taetaespeaches]

Ok so my seventeen bias…. It literally took me months to figure out who my bts bias was and I’ve not changed since that day (my eyes may stray often but I am aggressively loyal to my man), so I imagine I’ll take a while to lock something in 😂 BUT, at the moment I’m really vibing the ‘97 line and Wonwoo…. like Wonwoo is so my type… I feel giggly about him (which isn’t a surprise because I’m always attracted to introverted men or extroverted women (literally don’t ask me why i’m a walking contradiction with my romantic taste i have no idea it’s so strange ik)), so Wonwoo is just making me feel all warm and crushy. And then the ‘97 line are cracking me tf up…. I just want to be friend with them so bad. Minghao was the one at the hybe picnic that made me google him cause I was like HE’S COOL AND CUTE WHO IS HE, and then I fell down the hole… So those 4, but Minghao is the reason for this mess and I currently would like to be Wonwoos wife 😮‍💨 I’ve got all their stage names down, but I need a play by play of the nicknames vs real names… that shit has my head spinning. ALSO, drop the spotify! I feel like I’d love your music taste, but especially the svt playlist would be so helpful 🫶

I also completely forgot to sign off my last ask, but it’s drunk anon! So hi! I’m really glad to hear you’ve been reading and *trying to* write! I have been to! I really struggle with reading (undiagnosed adhd things) apart from your fics of course (WHICH I just finished re-reading your whole master list top to bottom just fyi… took me a solid wee while but damn it was enjoyable) but I’ve already read 5 BOOKS THIS YEAR… Idk what’s gotten into me but 2023 drunk anon is thriving!

All my love, lovely Liv 🤍

Ok I thought it was you but I didn't want to assume lol hi! Oof I love that you're decisive and loyal with your biases lol I cannot relate! Poor Tae, I've strayed so many times :( 97 line and wonwoo is >>>> I feel that lol. I have SUCH a soft spot for wonwoo but like I think I want to be besties with him. (I'm cackling at you being attracted to introverted men and extroverted women, that's actually so cute). The 97 line are super funny, love them all. It takes a minute to learn all their names for sure lol I mean ITS A LOT OF NAMES! Oh here's the svt playlist, you can explore my account if you want lol

(undiagnosed adhd things- why are you so relatable???) I'm so glad you had fun reading through the masterlist again :( I love you! Dude I've been reading tons too what the fuck is happening?! I jut finished my sixth book of the year so that's WILD. Yay to all the books you've read! Here's to a thriving drunk anon in 2023, you're killing it lovely <3

Sending you love 🧡

[yakocchi]

Our Prenuptial Nightmare // Eisuke

hooray, finally the end to this dumb season LOL but i like this one a lot…… maybe it’s even the one from this season only worth reading (i havent read all of them tho)

well this one is actually kind of refreshing bc as i posted before, it’s abt the MC losing her memories. she’s not just a season 1 blank slate… she doesn’t remember anything after getting a job at the Tres Spades, so she barely remembers her own friends as well. yikesu

my rambling behind the cut

so eisuke honestly treats her the same as he always does, just obviously more distanced (im gonna read the His POV after this so idk rn). shes pretty spooked about this scary guy, maybe even more than she was in season 1 since he’s way more caring about her health or w/e despite being a CEO and all. for a pretty long time, he keeps her stuck in the hospital. he brings her a dvd that contains a media appearance of him publicly introducing her as his fiancée and she’s like “tf, is this a prank???” and all sorts of ppl visit her and stuff. shes still pretty much in disbelief about the whole thing until her parents come visit and they clearly know who this weird guy is

eventually she gets stuck in his penthouse instead. tbh she’s probably not “healthy” enough to work rn given that she doesn’t remember anything about her job, but she can’t even step one foot outside the room without soryu and his goons (appointed by eisuke) being like “HEY WAT U DOIN” so it’s kind of dull and jarring for her haha. later she finds a diary that she wrote in before her memory loss and she’s like “oh wow……. i was simpin that hard for this guy huh” (ok more like “wow, i really love this guy huh”… but i mean same thing). she also wants to make food for him and cooked up a risotto but since eisuke’s been busy af, she ends up falling asleep before he comes home (late) to eat it.

then eventually she presses forward about learning more bc she feels that eisuke is hiding a lot about himself, esp. in terms of what he does. and shes right abt that bc hes purposefully not saying anything abt the black market auctions, etc. eventually eisuke gives in and explains to her the whole 20m bid thing that started this whole romance. she tells him she wants to learn more, and so eisuke turns it into a whole date. They have a date that’s the “type of date for a first date”, and then it concludes with the inn at Kobe.

PART 2 eisuke makes it sound like hes gonna bone her but obv the guy is just teasing for the most part and it ends p cute bc he’s sweet (sweet for his standards) about it. later they go to that same petting zoo or w/e with the cute bunnies. lol eventually the same bunny that doesn’t seem to hate him shows up too. they end up bringing the rabbit home (the rabbit’s name is Maron, as in “chestnut”) to take care of. i guess maron is their animal bebe now it’s been like a month, so she returns to work eventually. hikaru notes that she’s doing pretty well for someone who doesn’t remember how any of this works. but then later, she passes out while remembering the strange discussion she overheard the day she lost her memories. eisuke goes WAH MC and then when she eventually wakes up and he’s like “it’s ok, dw abt it” while she’s like “bro i got something to tell u”. next day he tells her that he’s made her the Floor Leader of the eventual “Tres Spades Maldives”, but then she realizes during the flight that the man with her is not Eisuke, but Yuuma sent there to comfort her and also to do the Maldives business stuff. it’s obvious eisuke’s trying to separate from her. after all, it’s been a month and there’s no sign of her memories returning. he’s pretty blunt about organizing all of it without her realizing (wow what’s new). she’s really sad about it but relents and goes with it anyway. i mean eisuke is obviously pretty sad about it too since he parts with her with that genuine smile and says along the lines of “Don’t forget… that I’ve always loved your dumb face.” why i QQin BRO

well hikaru and yuuma are here in maldives so not too bad. also the penthouse bedroom is pretty good, it’s an aquarium lookin thing anyway so obv eventually the “generic gangster model” guy has to show up and kidnap her. well yuuma comes to the rescue and blahblah they want to murder her bc eisuke knew too much abt business nonsense going on again and then she dives into the sea. before she drowns, the real eisuke miraculously shows up to save her blahblah everyone else comes to save the day (2) and then they return to the Maldives suite. eisuke is like “smh i should’ve taught u how to protect urself” (…) “swear to me that u will not behave like an idiota ever again” and her memories come back after she goes “I can’t promise that (…) if you put yourself into danger, then I will continue to do the same” and has a flashback of his confessions from various seasons. HUGS lol that cg really has him going :I before a : )

everything goes back to normal, she finds a ring on her right hand and they’re wearing like… couple rings..... boi you guys are supposed to be married soon, just wait for those well fin. i skipped a buncha stuff in this “ramble” but yea my first impressions and all

[vaguely-concerned]

TF x Graves, 2500 words, complete and utter fluff

Stifling another yawn against the back of my hand I glance over at the window, which shows only the flat dark of a moonless night outside, before turning my eyes back to the line of T.F.’s naked back.

I’m already undressed and perched on the side of the bed, watching as T.F. is still in the middle of his nightly ritual of hanging or folding his fine clothes up all properly and neatly, lest they, I don’t know, unduly crease somewhere they ain’t meant to or somethin’. Listen, I keep my clothes in a pile on the floor by the side of the bed, right next to the shotgun, both within easy reach in the case of a middle-of-the-night emergency skipping of town. Our priorities in these matters don’t really intersect much, but to each his own and so on.

I don’t know why I’m waiting for him to come to bed to lie down myself, exactly — my eyes are already making a spirited attempt at staying shut on me whenever I blink, I’m pretty sure I’d be out and snoring in about three seconds once I got settled — but my skin has that thin restless thrum all through it that I know from experience won’t be satisfied until he’s settled into place against me and besides, the view is nothin’ to sneeze at in the meantime. He stands there shirtless, belt unbuckled and hanging loose around his narrow hips, though the fastenings of his trousers are still done up. In the light of the oil lamp across the room he’s in a rare state of relaxed unselfconscious disarray, his hair grown out long enough again that it spills over his shoulders and down his back while he fastidiously fastens the cufflinks back into place on the empty shirt so they’ll be easy to find in the morning. As he finishes up with the cufflinks he sings to himself under his breath, a good-natured jaunty little tune I vaguely remember the Brick would sometimes break out once you got a couple of drinks in him.

The hum under my skin grows higher and keener.

Stretching an arm out I hook my fingers into one of his belt loops and gently pull him in by it towards the side of the bed, until he’s standing between my legs. It prompts a half-bemused noise from him, but he goes along easily — when I wrap my arms around his waist and rest my forehead against his belly he seems to catch on, though, a sound of amusement vibrating through his chest.

He slides his hand to the back of my neck, twining his fingers into the short hair there, thumb trailing back and forth along the hairline.

T.F.’s too damned scrawny to have much in the way of padding anywhere, but there’s the warm body softness to him here nevertheless, the sweet yield and shift of a living thing whose pliancy belies the supple strength beneath. I rest my cheek against the flat of his stomach and sigh, moving my hand at the small of his back in slow caressing circles.

“Come to bed already,” I murmur, too sleep-softened along the edges to worry overmuch about makin’ sense.

He chuckles, fingers stroking through my hair. “Well, I was on my way, but then I was waylaid by some deplorable fellow in the process. Hell of a thing.”

I grin and turn my face up to him, so that my chin is resting against his belly and my lips brush his skin when I talk. “Huh. Sounds like a real shady character. You want a trustworthy sorta guy to escort you safely the rest of the way?”

“With such dangerous reprobates skulking around in the area, that’s probably for the best,” T.F. nods somberly, fond amusement deepening his voice. He runs his thumb down the bridge of my nose. “Could I afford to hire the services of a strapping upstanding gentleman like yourself, though?”

I make a nonchalant sound in my nose, squeezing him closer against me for a moment. “Eh, don’t worry ‘bout it, this one’s on the house.”

His thumb drifts down to rest at the upturned corner of my mouth as he grins back at me. “Hey, looks like it’s my lucky day.”

I kiss his stomach and lean back enough so I can start in on the fastenings of his trousers — not with any sort of heat behind it, there’s no hint of sex in the air, but in a weird way this is equally satisfying, the everyday-textured contentment of being close without any particular purpose, being the one to slowly render him naked in front of me for no other reason than that he lets me, his hands still smoothing patiently through my hair while I work.

Once I’ve got all the buttons sorted I run my thumb along the sharp edge of his hip bone until I can tuck it into the waist of his trousers and use it to tug them down. We get them about half-way down his thighs like that before we have to pause for him to shimmy out of them the rest of the way on his own, his hand resting on my shoulder for balance as he does the traditional one-legged hop to extricate his foot. Serves him right for only ever wearing pants that might as well have been painted onto him. I mean, not that I’m complainin’, mind.

“Whoa!” he says, laughing as he almost overbalances at the last hurdle, but my hand shoots out to steady him by the hip before too much disaster can be wrought. “Well, not the smoothest strip tease I’ve ever pulled off, sorry about the inconvenience.”

I nose at the newly revealed crease of his hip over the edge of his underwear. “Eh, that’s okay, if I actually wanted a proper show I’d just suggest a round of strip poker again and sit back and watch while you lose.”

“Oh, that’s a strange yet beautiful dream world you’ve made up for yourself there, Malcolm. It’s touching, really, the things the mind will do to protect itself from the truth. Positively — aah!”

T.F. jumps as I draw some of the skin of his hip between my lips and use them to nip sharply at it. His startled yelp turns into a snigger as I let go, possibly ruining the castigating effects somewhat when I brush my lips soothingly over that spot right after.

“Let that be a lesson to ya,” I say sternly.

“A lesson on what, that your mom was apparently half turtle?”

I grunt, still trailing soft kisses over his skin. “That judge in Piltover was right back then, you are an incorrigible menace to all decent and right-thinking people everywhere.”

“First of all, that might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, Malcolm, thank you. Two, including yourself among the ‘decent and right-thinking’ feels like the invention of some fresh new form of fraud by way of imposture unfolding before my eyes, and it’s an honour. And third, that seems to me to be some very selective memory you have there, considering His Honour Judge Highton had some even more colourful words for you after you blew up the entire north wall of the court building breakin’ me out.”

“He might’ve been given to wearing a damn silly mop on his head, but you couldn’t fault him on his vocabulary,” I concede. Before that whole incident I’d honestly thought the wigs were some sort of practical joke the Pilties would play on gullible outsiders, but as it turns out no, if you get sent to jail in the twin cities they add the indignity of makin’ someone wearing a dead badger on their head break the bad news to you. It’s a strange ol’ world out there, alright. In Bilgewater, where people are much more sensible, the justice system basically boils down to the bounty board, or — if you’ve really managed to make a nuisance of yourself — a bunch of captains may call a temporary ceasefire with each other and go get your ass together. I’ve found that the risk of getting on the bad end of an unfair trial is about the same in both places, though of course the Bilgewater one tends to be harder to come back from if carried out to its fullest. I consider myself a bit of an expert in these things.

T.F. makes a thoughtful sound. “To be fair I don’t think anyone had ever given him cause or inspiration for profanity like you did.”

“Aw. That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

He leans down and kisses the top of my head before he straightens for long enough to work his second foot free as well, standing there in just the sleek silky underpants he somehow seems to have an endless fresh supply of wherever we go. (My money’s on some sinister underground ring of lingerie-oriented tailors across south-eastern Valoran, for the record; when it comes to secret societies the Noxians just can’t help themselves.)

“I do my best. Hang on just one moment, I’ll be right back,” he says and ruffles my hair before he turns around, which I would complain about except that the view is, as previously mentioned, impeccable, and I’m sleepy enough to be magnanimous.

After meticulously folding his trousers and leaving them with the rest of his clothes, T.F. moves over to the table across the room and extinguishes the oil lamp, then whistles under his breath as he produces a card from somewhere — he does this, seemingly from thin air and no matter how little he’s wearing; I prefer not to speculate too much about how, exactly — and lets a little magic into it so it gives off a low glow, only enough to light his way the short walk back across the room, ‘cause in T.F.’s world the stubbing of toes and smacking of shins against unexpected furniture in the dark is somethin’ that happens to other people. That probably says some things about him I’m not ready to go puzzlin’ out at this time of night, and that he wouldn’t want to have anyone go puzzlin’ about too hard in the first place anyway.

When I hold out my hand for him in the dark he smiles and takes it, twining our fingers together, and I use the hold to tug him in and deposit him, in a neat controlled wrestler’s roll held close against me as I lay down, to his side of the bed. He laughs again at that, a surprised delighted sound that edges dangerously close to a giggle but hey, I ain’t no snitch, so who’s gonna testify against him, huh?

The card ends up on the far side of his pillow after the tumble, still giving off a glow, enough to illuminate the bed and lend the shadows around it some warmth. It makes the bed seem a small cozy island, the rest of the world rendered a not-unfriendly ocean of darkness around it.

T.F. looks at me like the world’s most contented castaway, bourgeoning crow’s feet punctuating his smile on either side and fingers still linked with mine. His hair is mussed from the meandering fall onto the bed. If I were only fractionally less about five seconds away from fallin’ asleep, my body might start to get ideas about it. Well, tomorrow is always another day.

With the back of my free hand I brush some of his hair away from his brow, and he cranes into it like a well-pleased cat. Even with the blankets tangled around our feet and the not-quite-right positions we’ve ended up in, having tumbled into place rather than settled ourselves with purpose, everything feels warm and loose and comfortable, like I could fall asleep like this even with the decidedly odd angle my arm is at.

As if sensing that the drowsiness is about to claim me for real, T.F. brings our linked hands up to his face so he can press his lips to my scarred knuckles before he lets go, then reaches to pull the covers over us, taking a moment to tuck the blanket around my shoulder properly before snuggling under it himself, hooking his leg over my thigh as he settles into place. I shift until we fit together, the familiarity of how to rest against each other just right comfortable like an old and well-loved piece of clothing. On a sigh he rests our foreheads together, craning forward the tiny amount needed to brush our mouths together and humming contentedly when I meet him there. It’s a slow kiss, but it lingers, a dry sweet press of lips like one last spark sending the day off down into the gently drifting murk of sleep that’s about to claim me for a few hours.

When it ends — I don’t think either of us was really the first to pull back, at some point the kiss simply, in the way of snowflakes on tongues, melted into something different and less defined with the warmth — there’s a moment when my eyes can still fight against slipping shut. It’s weird, the way you can look at someone every day for years and still not feel like you’ve had your fill. T.F.’s sharp narrow face, his high pointy little cheekbones and mouth still curved with a smile as he watches me back — there’s something to knowing I’m gonna see all that again tomorrow morning that all the damn money on Runeterra couldn’t get you. And take it from me, from what I’ve seen of the world there ain’t a lot of things in this life enough money won’t buy. Stumbling across one of them long before we even knew what we had, by a stroke of little more’n dumb fucking luck… sometimes it feels like the biggest heist we ever pulled.

“Hey, Tobias?” I say, brushing the tip of my nose against his as my eyelids finally give up both the battle and the war and slide closed.

“Hmmm?” he says, cheerfully drowsy as well.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I murmur, because I can’t think of any damn happier thing in the world to say to him.

He wraps his arms around me, his hand stroking meanderingly up and down the scar-crossed span of my back, fingers trailing over my skin with the perfect amount of firmness because he’s taken the time to learn exactly how much pressure it takes to make it comforting. As sleep starts pulling me under to calmer depths I tuck my head under his chin, so my face is pressed to the line of his throat and to his chest. He smells so nice, all warmly real and well-known like my own breathing.

“Tomorrow,” he agrees on a yawn, nuzzling at the top of my head and tightening his arms around me, just for a moment.

I've been trying to write stuff -- literally just anything, no matter how meandering and nonsensical -- to try to break out of a writer's block; it's not really working so far but at least I've got SOMETHING tangible to show for it at the end of the day, so, you know, uh... partial success I guess?? haha

The idea of T.F. having a judge somewhere out there who considers him the One True Nemesis of his career, J. Jonah Jameson style, even though T.F. barely even remembers his name, came from a wonderful conversation with @inversway, and the idea makes me laugh so hard every time I think about it.

ETA: Also put this on AO3, so I have somewhere to put these ficlets that isn't just tumblr! I'm grimly clinging on to this blue hellsite like a obstinate barnacle to the hull of the Titanic, but I do realize it's not the best place to archive uh anything lol

[dadsbongos]

Reges Sumus

Movie/Game/Show: Danganronpa (which game/anime? who tf knows) Dynamic: Izuru Kamukura/Reader (heavily mentioned Hajime Hinata/Reader) Warnings: despair arc tings, i tried to put more into izuru’s character so i’m sorry if he comes out ooc :( Summary: Izuru knows he’s miserable, but he can never find himself pulling away. ~~~

“The world has fallen into despair. A despair so deep the entirety of humanity has cascaded into bloodlust. Anger. Fear. Hatred. Those outside our walls feel it all. Those outside our walls are jealous of us. Of our hope. Of our unity. Of our home. We cannot let them take us. We cannot let them take anything that is rightfully ours. Protect this place with your lives, for if you fall - so does our hope. So do I. So go out and fight, fight with all you have, fight with all you are. For your spouses, for your parents, for your children - for me. As long as you do so, we can save this world. We will save this world using my Ultimate as a weapon.”

“Praise be, oh Dominus.”

“Praise be, Reges Sumus.”

(Y/n) outstretched her arms to the crowd, “Now go, my children, my loves, save this world!”

In near perfect synchronist, the people pulled down their masks and turned to the large front door of the ransacked mansion, picking up their guns, bats, and knives as they left. Just in case, of course, it wasn’t their fault if someone wasn’t willing to give their rations to the leader. Same as it wasn’t their fault if their bat slipped over someone’s head, hard enough to crack open the skull like a nut, or if their fingers slipped over the trigger long enough to kill a small family over a can of beans. It wasn’t their fault. It was despair’s. It was Junko Enoshima’s.

“Dominus, aye?”

Looking to the source of the voice, (Y/n) gave the boy a close-eyed smile, she turned completely and waved off the guards that escorted the pair, “Fuyuhiko, Peko, my dears!” she let her hands fall on the blond’s cheeks, pressing a holy kiss to his forehead, leaving a lipstick stain in her wake before moving onto Peko and doing the same, “It’s lovely to have you visit.”

They both knew better than to wipe off the lipstick stains on their skin, anything even close to slander aimed at (Y/n) could be met with merciless death at her follower’s vengeful hands.

Fuyuhiko looked about the lavish room, decorated with stolen jewels and furniture, before nodding, “Not fuckin’ shabby.”

“Thank you,” (Y/n) clasped her hands together, bringing them to her chest in delight, “As much as I adore having you here, I must ask why drop by so suddenly?”

Peko piped up, “We got chased out of a hideout. Kazuichi thought it’d be funny to send us some Monokumas.”

“Oh, my! That’s not good at all,” the girl shook her head before turning and beginning to walk up a set of stairs, “Come.”

Following close after, Fuyuhiko watched as his fellow Despair trailed her fingertips gently over the paintings of herself hung in the hall. (L/n), (Y/n), Ultimate Charisma, had truly built herself a cult of lies. The belief that somehow her followers could rebuild the world and rid it of despair, somehow she could save the world with the power of her ultimate status.

She had no intention of doing so, but it gave the people something to believe in and fight for - and that was good enough.

“Here we are,” (Y/n) opened a bedroom door, a queen-sized mattress laying on the floor with no bed frame, “It’s the best I can do at the moment, my dearest apologies.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Fuyuhiko brushed off - he knew better than to complain.

Peko nodded, “This is enough.”

“I’m glad,” she gestured the pair inside, taking each of their hands and pressing a kiss to their knuckles, “Anything for my comrades.”

As she left, she shut the door. What despair would become of the poor soul whose room that was, a shiver went down (Y/n)’s spine at the mere thought.

Minor, of course, but only in the moment. It was one of many things that would slowly build up into a cacophony - and she was reveling in it.

Entering her own room, (Y/n) jumped slightly at the dark silhouette standing by her king-sized mattress, completed with the fanciest bed frame she could steal, before recognizing the long, flowing hair. She smiled at the boy, hands already reaching out for him, “Oh, Izuru, my darling,” she took his cheeks, lovingly brushing her thumbs over the bones and bringing his forehead to her lips in a staining kiss, “Did you get in with Fuyuhiko and Peko?”

He made no gesture of nodding but the agreement was there, or perhaps he simply ignored her question and she was projecting upon a blank canvas, “I’ll admit, I wasn’t expecting you to start a cult, but won’t they tear you apart when they realize what you’ve done?”

The lies she’s told. The things she’s stolen. The people she’s killed. The sins living in her veins thrived on every weeping babe and execution splattering across these walls of hers.

“Isn’t that the point? The despair. Having everything I’ve worked for crumble when the worms revolt,” she answered, sitting upon her bed and patting the space beside her for Izuru, “Sit, my dear, I haven’t seen you in ages.”

“It hasn’t been that long,” he corrected.

“No, but I missed your face,” she leaned over, not particularly caring of any personal boundaries he may have, and brushed back his hair, slicking it away from his face and tying it back, “Well, it’s not truly your face, is it?”

Izuru didn’t respond, simply watching as the woman took a finger down the bridge of his nose.

“It’s Hajime Hinata’s,” her smile faded for the first time in a long time, a soft frown taking its place, “We were close, you know?”

“So I’ve heard,” Izuru grabbed (Y/n)’s wrist as her fingertip brushed his cupid’s bow, “I have no memory of that, you know.”

“I do.”

“So don’t force me to.”

“I’m not,” denying his claim, (Y/n) knew he didn’t believe her - though to be fair, she didn’t believe herself either, “I just like the despair of being so close, yet so far, from my beloved Hajime.”

Silence festered within the room once again.

A smile slowly teased back onto (Y/n)’s face, “You must be tired, but there’s something I simply have to show you.”

He knew where she was going with this, an attempt at recruitment as usual, but something deep, deep, deep down told him to go along with it. Perhaps it was a rare pity.

Perhaps it was the part of him enamored with the one called Dominus.

Perhaps it was the part of him that mourned the Ultimate Gamer.

Perhaps it was both.

Perhaps it was him. 

Any which way, he stood and followed after the woman, the red of the sky drenching the walls through cracked, dusty windows as they traversed down the hallway.

Passing Fuyuhiko and Peko’s room, passing the guard’s posts, passing the main room - (Y/n) led Izuru to a room at the very end of the grand corridor. Cardboard had been hastily tacked onto the wood with messy, uneven letters spelling out ‘nursery’ in bold. She pushed the door open easily enough, despite the clear indication it should’ve been locked, and gestured the long-haired man through. 

It was dark save for the faint light emanating from a baby monitor hooked onto a stained crib in the corner with ‘K.S’ etched into the corner. From what Izuru could see, there were about four cribs in the room and all of them filled with a sleeping baby.

“I feel no sympathy for babies in despair.”

“I never wanted kids,” (Y/n) brushed past the man and his words, her voice quiet to avoid waking the children, “I always thought they were snotty, whiny, loud, annoying little money-suckers who took and took and took until they were of age to take care of themselves and then they leave you forever…” she ran a finger over the sticky wood, “and I still do. But Hajime,” she hesitantly took a glance at Izuru, knowing she’d never find what she wanted in his gaze, “Hajime liked kids. He wasn’t sure he wanted any but I think he might’ve.”

Izuru watched the woman slowly revert back to his side to watch the babies as they slept, “So?”

“Do you want kids, Izuru?”

“I’m a war criminal.”

“War criminals can want kids, can’t they?” she huffed at his difficulty, previously cheery attitude slipping into her real feelings, “Someone being unfit to be a parent doesn’t stop them. I don’t know of any restrictions preventing someone from having a child, do you?” when he didn’t respond, she continued, “Hajime’s parents were unfit and still, they had him. I’m glad he was born but I wish it was to better people.”

“He didn’t seem to resent them. From what little I can feel of him.”

“He doesn’t seem to resent a lot of people he should. But it’s his life, who am I to interject?” she sarcastically mumbled, patience for Izuru Kamukura growing thinner, “I told him the procedure was an awful idea and look who’s standing next to me…”

“You seem to hate me and yet you strangely desire me at your side.”

“I told you already, it’s the despair.”

“I’m not stupid, (Y/n), I can see through you.”

Her shoulders tensed.

“Your request is impossible and you know that.”

She just wants her boyfriend back, is that really so much to ask for?

“My request is…” she paused, pursing her lips and furrowing her brows, “My request is…”

“I’ll be taking a room for the night,” he coldly informed.

“Stay with me,” (Y/n) took Izuru by his sleeve, fingers grasping at the clothes she’d never seen on her lover before - and she still hasn’t, technically. Because it wasn’t him, no matter how much she wished for him to magically wake up and be Hajime again - deep down, she knew better.

Izuru looked at the woman, her eyes slowly wetting and bottom lip quivering. She didn’t want him. She may have thought he was attractive, but that was only because he had stolen a man’s face.

She’d never want him.

It… stung. To know a woman so enamored with a lesser version of yourself, or who you had taken over, wasn’t similarly enamored with you. And she never could be. He didn’t like feeling so hurt over her rejection. He didn’t like knowing why it hurt.

Because he always wanted her.

He shook off her hand before wordlessly leaving the room and beginning his trek towards their shared abode for the night.

He wasn’t Hajime Hinata, he was Izuru Kamukura and he knew that no matter how much he wanted the sting to die, he would still be Izuru Kamukura when he woke up in (Y/n)’s arms the next morning.

It was Junko’s curse.

It was despair.

[athys-obelia]

summary: no one's evil au lmfaooo but make it pt. 2

character/s: anastacius de alger obelia, claude de alger obelia, athanasia de alger obelia, jennette de alger obelia

and here's part 1 <3

oh my god okay. okay. so.

ana, claude, athy and jennette - they go on a LOT of vacations

claude complains every single time but anastacius pulls his trump card and sends athy and jettie BOTH after him

u think he's strong enough to say no after that? lmao jokes

and their vacations always go this way:

jennette: isn't this scenery just gorgeous, uncle

claude: indeed it is. and...quiet

jennette: ...too quiet

[cut to anastacius in the distance, fighting a bear as athy cheers him on]

athy + anastacius, hands down the most chaotic pairing yes i will not be taking criticism

they have tea in ana's palace everyday, just the two of them, they're so poised and picture perfect through the entire thing everyone thinks it's just the emperor giving profound advice to his heir

it's actually them deadass scheming,,, ana has no qualms discussing everything from court gossip to military tactics, both of which she's so on top of all the time

if anyone shit talks jennette or claude, this tea party is where their slow and agonizing demise is planned out to the dot

[true story - count sivan once made the fatal mistake of expressing his favour for athy as the next empress, dissing jennette by comparing her to athy sm which inevitably sparked a debate that ranked the princesses. a week after athy's sources informed her of the kindling behind this new debate, the count's sudden divorce became the talk of the town, and the man's business faced bankruptcy all of a sudden. the sivans still haven't recovered.)

athy n jennette were actually allowed to visit kiel in arlanta a few times, except it was too dark at their first arrival, postponing the meeting to the next morning

buttt then jettie can't sleep and she decides on a midnight snack run (their hotel doesn't really have the maids the palace does, but oh well. she's left the palace w lucas n athy plenty of times)

felix tags along btw, he knows this trip is important to the girls since they're leaving the palace without their Overprotective Papas™ for the first time and want some sense of independence, but... she's just so smol n he couldn't bear it if anything happens so he just shadows her

she totally knows he's there

n e ways so there's a juice place right beside their hotel which she aims for, but when jennette reaches it, it's closed

and out of nowhere, a voice addresses her - "hey you, do you come here a lot?" she nearly jumps out of her skin at the brunette, relaxing when she sees he's literally a kid around her age and not a murderer lmfaoo "me neither," he continues without waiting for her, pouting at the closed sign, before he asks for her name and whether she's new in arlanta

she confirms that yes, she's only visiting, and refuses to tell the stranger her name, still feeling strange at being addressed as 'you' for the first time (well, minus lucas, but he was like her brother and had the emotional capacity of a teaspoon, so)

he eyes her. "you're so weird. i've never seen a girl out so late before, and alone too. are you stupid?"

(felix has his sword out at this point)

she's flushing now and has no idea why she's still out here, but then this stranger kid apparently senses her mood and tells her the best ice cream store in arlanta is not too far away

(he also explains he knows someone who's starts doing weird things when she's hungry as well, and tries to defend that ice cream is actually a healthy midnight snack, "you can just take a healthy flavour like strawberry or mango, mangos are healthy,,right"💀️💀)

so jettie has travelled all the way from obelia, she loves her papa but he would have a heart attack if he found out she was ever awake this late?? yeah bc she's never getting this chance again, jennette accepts the offer

the stranger boy seems to be taking the whole "i'm not telling you my name," thing like a joke, and asks what he should call her since 'you' was getting boring

she goes with "lady j" and like a knight, the boy becomes "sir c"

(felix is on the verge of committing a crime - the princesses can only have one knight, after all)

they walk as the the boy navigates the streets in the dark, and she asks whether he's from the academy, seeing his uniform

"of course i am! you could probably tell bc i look so smart, right?"

she snorts. "yeah, that."

she also comes to know that this guy,,,well he might as well be a tourist? she's out here asking stuff like "oh where's the statue of lady alphia?" or "aren't we really close to the museum where they keep the first emperor's sword?" and he goes "lady do i look like your brochure?? but if you turn right from here there's a cool arcade and across the street from there is the best street food vendor you'll ever eat from."

well at least mans had his priorities straight 😌

"so can you take this off?" he asks, pointing towards her dress once they've neared the store

um???????? sir tf????????????

anyways jettie has been living with lucas n her dad farr too long to not take this the wrong way?? "...no?"

the boy raises an eyebrow "look, it looks like an expensive cloak but i promise i'll return it, alright? i gotta hide my uniform."

ohhhhhhh. 😳.

so she unfastens the cloak and because he's kinda just staring at it cluelessly (he can't even tie his shoelaces fight me), jennette sighs and moves the clothing over his shoulder, fastening it in place at his neck

he's literally a tomato when she looks back up and realises that yes, we are way too close rn

bc she's ana's daughter, jennette by default cannot function when she's flustered. so she kinda stumbles backwards like a fish out of water (years of princess training n etiquette? where art thou??) and 'sir c' has to grab her forearm so she doesn't bump into the pillar behind her smfh

the shopkeep is definitely suspicious of this pair that's definitely too young to be out so late, but chalks it down to his sleeplessness

they escape the store with the ice cream before the shopkeep can ask any questions, and 'sir c' escorts jennette back to her hotel. he climbs onto the roof of the building, helping her up as well

(felix wishes he had a magic stone to capture this moment, this is the first time he's seen jennette become such fast friends with someone)

she stands on the roof (it hurts her butt so she doesn't wanna sit)

"my sister would be so jealous right now," jennette murmurs, "she told me her ideal first date would be either a picnic or something like a moonlit walk. we're having like a moonlit picnic."

it's silent for a few seconds the boy speaks up, "is this a date?"

oh-

oh.

"i mean- i didn't- i don't- uh."

give her some time lmfao she's loading

"i don't really mind that," he tells her, and she thinks she might just walk off the roof in her embarrassment - who just says something like that?? "you're probably feeling really lucky right now, right?"

jennette: ✊😔

he does look pretty in the moonlight, she admits to herself, listening as he excitedly tells her about his siblings at home and how she should send an offering to the gods since they gave her the good fortune to be on a date with the most good looking one of all four of them

in turn, she tells him about how she spent her childhood away from her amazing dad and had gotten closer to him recently, about her sharp-witted uncle, her sister and friends

(the 'friends' section includes felix and he's melting)

she smiles - it's almost as if, at finding out he treasures his family just as much as she does, they've gotten a bit closer

and he tries to listen. jennette had guessed that his temperament was somewhat like her dad's - her dad didn't know how to listen, always making his opinion known before anything else, though she supposes as emperor he could do that

'sir c', on the other hand, tried his best, his blue eyes focused on her as he almost burst from the unsaid words he was holding back, trying to let her finish. the sight was an odd mix of sad and insanely adorable that she couldn't help but let him tell her about everything he couldn't hold in

sensing she could pass out from her exhaustion nearly half an hour later, and 'sir c' escorts her to her window and helps her sneak in bc "what sort of knight would i be otherwise?!"

(felix can't stop shaking the entire night)

the next morning, jennette's heart is pounding as kiel shows her, athy and felix across campus - the chance is low, but still...

"ezekiel!" comes a voice, and the four watch as a turquoise haired boy waves down the alpheus heir "are these the guests you mentioned?"

kiel introduces the trio to johannes vastia before asking, "where's cabel?"

"at the training grounds, he asked if you could bring everyone there so he could show them around there."

"... they're my guests though?"

athy is quick to befriend johannes (i mean she and his sister are practically the same person, so) and at the grounds, jennette's blood runs cold

(so does felix's)

the brunette doesn't notice her at first, arguing with johannes about something as kiel introduces him as cabel ernst

jennette is hyperventilating?? actually back up is this girl even breathing??

cabel ernst from kiel's letters? the 'loud and obnoxious cabel ernst', who gradually turned into 'my acquaintance cabel ernst', then 'hardworking, passionate cabel ernst', and finally 'my friend cabel'?

she'd actually rather admired this slow build of respect between her friend and the ernst boy, and had even expressed her interest to meet him

"this is the first daughter of his highness prince claude de alger obelia, princess athanasia-" cabel mock salutes the princess before his mouth forms an 'o' and he remembers to bow, "-and here's the emperor's only daughter, her highness princess je-"

andddd his eyes widen comically "-hey, lady, it's you?"

yeah jettie is on the brink of literal death - her entire face reddens as this...cabel, grins at her

she watches as he glances behind her, "and you're the guy who was following us - sup?"

felix flinches "...you knew...?"

cabel shrugs. "i mean you do kinda suck ass at the whole subtle thing."

"don't say it like that," jennette retorts, "felix was trying his best."

"princess 😭😭 you knew as well?"

"uhhhh no?"

athy + kiel in a corner: 👁️👄👁️

they watch as cabel's eyes widen all of a sudden and he just,,,runs away

...🐦...🐦...🐦...

yeah well anyway he comes rushing back a few minutes later, a piece of cloth in his hand "...*huff* here *huff*...you go."

athy totally flips out "jennette is that your CLOAK???!??"

"uhhhhh no?"

"um do you realise uncle would literally wage war at this."

and as if it would make everything better,

"i washed it," cabel offers with a grin

"you didn't," the vastia heir deadpans

"i mean, johan helped a little bit."

kiel smiles murderously at the pair. "johan, did you know cabel took the princess out?"

"wait, you're a PRINCESS??"

your honour they aren't very smart

so the group orders some coffee (milk for cabel smfh) to find out what happened, cabel mentions "date" and everything goes to shit again lmfao

kiel and felix scheme against poor cabel while athy n johan get over that stage pretty quick ("listen. MY sister will be living with ME after the marriage and if your friend wants to be with her he'll have to come with us to obelia." and johan's just like "fine by me ✌️😊") and start planning the wedding

cabel + jennette dip n sneak out of the academy again to get the juice they couldn't the night before bc shit is getting awkward here

on another note, our uncle cius' musical intelligence is actually very high - he can probably play more instruments than i can name tbh, but he feels most comfortable singing and i shit you not, this man has straight up an angel's voice

(didn't like singing in front of others coz he was secretly a nerd and only knew old love songs with deep lyrics, athy found out and educated him)

jennette tends to have nightmares often, most often regarding their family - she's seen her father murder her uncle for the throne, and vice versa, athy admitting her affections towards jennette were a front to get the position of crown princess, her uncle killing her to solidify athy's claim, etc - her family is her everything, so despite however many times these horrible scenes play before her, she's left sobbing uncontrollably

and on these nights, she leaves for her father's room, who holds her close and sings her to sleep

also lucas n jennette are like sibling duo# 1,,, jettie is an active lucathy shipper even though he denies it sm - like their dynamic is just peaceful walks in the gardens as she watches the plants n lucas shi talks the nobility and kiel

claude and athy have a thing for each other's sleeping on each other? idk it's weird

athy once fell asleep on the couch while reading with him, and claude moved her head onto his lap so she wouldn't be uncomfy sitting - well, she woke up to his hand absentmindedly raking through her hair and it was just so soothing that whenever she's tired and he's working or reading, she just plops her head on his lap and zzzz

and claude wondered what was up with that, so she proposed they switch roles and he felt so awkward trying to lay down in front of her lmao

obviously athy noticed and she just started reading, thinking he might be more comfortable if her attention isn't on him completely - she ended up reading out loud while playing with his collar and he just,,,passed out

also anastacius has definitely pulled jennette aside regarding the issue of his heir at some point - she had been hesitant at first before admitting she wouldn't like to be the empress at all

i know we'd all love to see empress!jettie and her sister duchess!athy ruling the court, but i really really really can't see her wanting the title?

so thus start athy's empress lessons, but holy shit her teacher is mean

like this man makes me want to bash his face in?? so he doesn't like the idea of athy becoming empress over jennette at all, all bc of both hers and claude's mothers being commoners

he has one of those long ass sticks that you use in presentation to point at stuff?? idk but basically mans has athy name every region, its lords and their vassals during their first lesson

the first time she gets one wrong, she's too shocked as the stick meets the delicate skin of her forearm to react

now the thing is, wmmap!athy would probably stand up against this bc her dad is the emperor and she's his only heir, but i imagine with anastacius' social nature he holds many parties / balls where she's probably heard claude's mom + diana slander and it wouldn't be unreasonable for her to be self conscious abt it (now she's the emperor's heir while jennette, 100% royal + noble blood, is right there which probably makes her feel even less legitimate)

so she endures it, the light marks on her arms as well as the taunts of his she's too smart to not understand - perhaps this is the price to be accepted in jennette's place?

and honestly, no one really notices until at breakfast a few weeks in, where jennette mentions how her dresses are still so modest when sleeveless dresses were more in fashion - ana is suspicious because athy is always on top of these things, societal trends and such, and claude is sus from the way she hesitates slightly in her answer, "i haven't had the time lately, i suppose"

the lesson after focuses on ettiquete since everyone knows she's good at politics and such already, but now tears of frustration are pooling in her eyes because what the hell?? this guy had made an opinion of her long before he even met her, so anything she did would be wrong in his eyes

he gives her a sinister smile, "tired, princess?"

"no," she insists, keeping her voice level. he's about to spout some other nonsense, when anastacius enters the room, taking a seat across from her

anastacius watches quietly as athy answers the teacher's questions in her "public" voice. he watches as her usually cheery disposition is replaced by something far more...dead, despite the front she puts on for him. he's soundless as she hesitates in her answers where she normally would've been louder, more confident. he stops watching in silence when his niece flinches at the sight of the stick

oh.

he interrupts her lesson, not missing the way she winces almost imperceptibly when he grabs ahold of her arm, announcing, "we're going."

he just- it's just that that was the moment he knew for sure - the sight of his niece emotionally disheveled for the first time reminds him too much of how his own brother had once been, and he'd... he'd promised he wouldn't let anyone hurt his family anymore

he ends up taking her to the port with some of his advisors to welcome some royal guests, insisting that she would learn better from experience rather than books - but the guest delegation gets so boring that he sneaks her out of the meeting n they end up in the streets

now athy has no idea where they are, but apparently her uncle does?? ana has his hand on her head as he navigates the streets of the capitol as if he comes here everyday, using magic to casually disguise the two of them

in the meantime?

felix is at the port trying to cover for them smfh, he makes up this huge story about how the great wise emperor wanted to familiarize his heir with the locals, understand her subjects, yada yada

back at the palace prince claude is currently dragging a man by his collar and only upon jennette's insistence does he throw him in prison rather than literally kill him

(jettie visits him later in prison to give the guy a piece of her mind, after felix's visit he's sporting a few noticable bruises and the prisoner is practically unrecognizable once lucas visits)

back to athy + ana, they end up stuffing themselves with some super good street food as anastacius confesses that yes, he has definitely been sneaking out of the palace ever since he was a lil kid

athy almost mentions that she, lucas n jettie sneak out too but that might give him a heart attack, so

"it's so pretty, uncle cius," she says, gesturing towards the necklace he holds up. once he's paid for it, anastacius fists the necklace, opening it to reveal the jewel pendant - now imbued with his magic and replaced with gold lettering of the word athanasia

and she realises that yes, that's what both him and her dad have called her all her life, haven't they?

"you're my heir, athanasia," he uncle tells her with a small smile, "i am proud of that."

getting teary, she tells him, "i'm really proud of you too, uncle cius," triggering a very flustered + blushy anastacius

this mans craves validation - not from the sycophantic nobility, or the obsequious concubines he'd dismissed all those years ago, but from the family he thought he'd neither have nor deserve

and just the acknowledgement is so large for athy - he wants her as his heir, not because she's his niece, but bc he trusts her to look after his hard work after him??? - yeah she's totally bawling her eyes out

anastacius magics her a handkerchief but my mans magic isn't that strong?? lmao he's used up so much by now that the 'handkerchief' turns out to be some scratchy tissues

awkward amirite

nope! athy laughs at that, offering him a sip of her drink as she magics another straw and a proper handkerchief lmfaoo

n e ways so when they return, everyone's shocked to learn that the crown heir, princess athanasia will actually be joining the official circles as anastacius' temporary aid - he doesn't wanna entrust her to anyone but family, and decides that the best way to learn is by his side

(she's so confused bc lucas doesn't normally bat an eyelash when she wears the prettiest gowns, but he deadass can't look her in the eyes when she's in her aid uniform - it's more like a suit than it is a dress)

yes lucas women in suits >>>>>

everyone is STUNNED when at dinner, claude proposes they leave on vacation??

anastacius is just not having it?? like no, this is not my brother, and he throws a grape at claude to check if it's a clone or sum (¿¿how does that work??)

anyays so he ain't no felix, ana's aim is ass and it hits jettie instead

mans nearly gets on his knees to apologise

long story short everyone preps for vacation, but by some aCCiDeNt claude n athy end up at a different destination than jettie n ana, when she suggests returning to the palace to regroup, mans deadass sulks

"so you wouldn't like to spend this time with your father, despite barely visiting my office for weeks?"

o-oh

so at their return, the nobility starts pestering everyone that the princesses aren't independent enough, yada yada idc so to quell this annoyance, to the girls' joy, they get to move into emerald palace together, while claude and ana stay in the ruby and main palaces respectively

literally emerald palace becomes such a cool place to be in since it's the residence of the only decent people in this family, the brothers spend hours going through the requests of maids who want to be transferred

it's such a busy time because of athy joining the court and jettie starting her studies as well - naturally, since she isn't becoming empress, she'll be getting the duchy claude + athy were to be given in the beginning

speaking of futures, jettie's interest in plants and cooking has definitely branched out into herbs

claude notices her tending to a small garden during his visit to athy and even gives her a few tips (he had been studying medical since he was a kid, and picked it up again when athy was born and the empire stablised somewhat)

this soon becomes a routinely thing, and he actually starts reading up on some herbs and even orders a few for her prospering garden

after a month of her learning from books, claude proposes adding a medic as one of her teachers, and turns out his hunch was right?? she's excelling at medicine and they keep it between themselves for the time being

it doesn't last long though, bc they're on a hunting trip when ana injures his leg

and !! this girl istg, she gets to cleaning and wrapping the wound without blinking an eye, as if it's the most natural thing ever, and claude is just smirking while athy and anastacius and literally everyone else: 🌟💞✨jettie✨💞🌟

literal tears coming out of anastacius' eyes "how come my daughter is smarter than me😭💅"

claude: that's not a very high standard, brother

anastacius: ✨suddenly i'm an only child✨

behold, the people in charge of running an empire everyone 👏👏👏

even though jennette is claude's (unofficial) student and athy is her uncle's heir, they both ask their dads to the debutante

yes athy does dance with lucas, anastacius sent him an invitation even though he wasn't a noble (he's an active match maker 😌) and nobody dared question the emperor's special guest

at the end of the night, kiel gives jettie a letter from arlanta - it's an invitation to the academy during holidays, from a certain brunette

when she brings up the subject, felix lets out a squeak and literally everyone goes silent 😭😭

athy n kiel are just out here DARING him to spill them beans

but anastacius takes on look at his excited lil kid and decides that yups, she's going to get everything she wants

a/n: i literally don't know how many parts this should have lmaoo but y'all made it this far!! thanks for reading i hope you liked it<3