#or not giving himself even more useless hope that will end up frustrating him (bc that’s what always happened in the past)

[ohworm-writes]

hello! :) so u know how kuon has a crush on sniper right ? can i get an imagine where reader is jealous bc of kuon, cuz u know, her crush on sniper etc etc (sorry i'm just vv lazy at typing), and how sniper reacts to it ?? can u make it like they're still friends but have mutual feelings for each other as they hang out as a unit, and they get together in the end bc sum confessions happened !! sorry if u don't get it i'm rlly bad at explaining but thank u in advance if u do this !! <33

High-Rise Invasion/Tenkuu Shinpan: Sniper Mask Boyfriend Imagine

high-rise invasion/tenkuu shinpan masterlist

‼ Jealous Reader (over Kuon) + Make up + Confession ‼

Featuring: Sniper Mask, Yuri Honjo, Mayuko Nise (implied), Kuon Shinzaki (implied)

Warnings: frustrated Y/n, crushes, jealousy

a/n - good GODS this has been in my inbox for a while and i’m so so so sorry for not posting it way sooner! hopefully you see this anon, and i hope you enjoy!

content below the cut!

you had developed a crush on the man in the mask ever since you first joined Yuri's little group

you couldn't really tell what it was the drew you to him

he was silent, dismissive, and he was a Mask for goodness sake!

but none of that deterred you from the attraction you garnered for him

you always found yourself trying to interact with him

whether it was offering your help with something that he was doing, or simply keeping him company

most times he brushed you off, walking away and not giving you an answer

other times he silently accepted your offer

those times the two of you would sit in comfortable silence, just enjoying one another's presence

you cherish moments like these for a very specific reason

Kuon

now you had nothing against the girl!

... at first

she seemed nice enough, always eager to help, and full of ignorant innocence

but then you realized her (very obvious) crush on the masked man

the way she got flustered around him so easily

the way she clung to him like a lost child

at first, you thought maybe she saw him as a parental figure, seeing how young she was

but that thought was (very) quickly thrown to the wind when you saw her wrapped up in his jacket, blushing like the schoolgirl she was and giggling to herself

so what she liked him? you liked him too, maybe the two of you could bond over that!

that's what you told yourself

of course, you never acted on it

it was simple, you were too jealous to do so

you noticed how Sniper Mask welcomed all her little instances without a care in the world

not giving a damn when she clung to him

or batting an eye at her obvious fangirling

it pissed you off

naturally, you began to avoid Kuon

and Sniper Mask simultaneously

you avoided the two of them whenever you could

when you saw them walking towards you, you kept to the opposite side of the wall and walked quickly past them

when you all usually ate together, you picked up your food and ate outside

you were simply, undeniably jealous

you didn't think Sniper Mask cared about it, not that you could tell under his mask

but in actuality, he was confused as to why you avoided him all of the sudden

so, he opted to ask you one day

You shut the door to the dining room rather aggressively as you exited, but you couldn't care less. You let your body slump against the adjacent wall, your plate of food resting on your lap.

Today had been... exhausting, to say the least. Kuon was on her usual actions of pining over 'Mr. Mask', crossing your way a few more times than you would have liked. During your meeting earlier with her and Yuri, your fellow mouthless masked allies, she had the gall to talk on and on about how much she adored him.

You hated it.

You looked down at your food, a scowl finding its place on your features. You glared at it, pushing the pieces around with your fork, not noticing a door open and close right in front of you.

"Jesus, if that food was alive, it would be 6 feet under with the glare you're giving it." You hear a gruff voice call from in front of you. A voice you would rather not be hearing right now.

You continue to move around the food, staying silent as the man awkwardly stands in front of you, unsure of what to do with himself in this situation. "Is it, uh, okay if I sit here?" He asks, which finally makes you look up.

He had a plate of food between his own hands, his jacket gone and sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His mask covered his face, per usual, but it seemed much more lopsided than usual.

You give him a shrug in response, looking back down at your food again. He stands there for a moment, before taking a seat right next to you, your knees almost touching. "You don't mind if I eat with you, right?"

His question makes your eye twitch. Was he seriously trying to be all buddy-buddy with you now? You shrugged again, not giving him as much as a single word.

You heard him sigh, setting his food to the side before he speaks again. "Alright, what's going on?" He asks, making your body tense up. "Nothing." You shoot back, scowling.

"What happened to the Y/n that stayed up and talked about their life for hours? What happened to the Y/n that told me horrible jokes to try and get a reaction out of me? Huh? What happened to them?"

That broke you.

You were angry, furious even. Was he trying to blame this on you? You didn't do anything wrong! If it wasn't for Kuon, maybe you would still be that person! If it wasn't for her, you could still be friends with him! You could be-

"What?" You hear him say softly, much softer than his previous tone. Shit, did you say that out loud? "Yeah, you did." He says again, looking at you with a concerned expression on his face, not that you could tell.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to lash out. I just- I’ve been-" You stutter, trying to find the right words. He laughs at that, actually laughs at it.

His laugh is hearty, warm, almost inviting you to laugh along with him. You don't, but he quickly composes himself, making your head turn towards him.

"Why on Earth were you jealous of Kuon?" He asks honestly, watching at how the invisible gears turn in your head, searching for an answer. You sigh heavily, running a hand across your face as you shake your hands while you speak.

"I just- she’s always there with you. She's latched onto you 24/7! I can't get 5 minutes alone with you before she comes barging in." You rant, frustration evident in your shaky voice.

"I just wanted to be your friend, be close with you. I can never do that because she's-she's there." You groan, hugging yourself with your arms. "I sound like a selfish idiot now, huh?"

You laugh dryly, frowning. He sighs, but a smile plays at his lips. "Y/n." He begins, his hand resting you your forearm. "You know she would never purposefully do that. She just, she has an infatuation with me I guess."

He sighs dramatically, earning a chuckle from you. "But." He tells you, watching your eyes as he speaks. "That doesn't mean I didn't miss you."

Your heart skips a beat at his comment, face flushing softly. "Kuon also misses you. You might not have caught onto it, but she looks up to you." He explains, smiling at how your expression softens, mumbling a soft 'she does?' to him.

He nods, laughing once more. "Come on, have dinner with the rest of us. We can't have you sitting alone out here anymore." You roll your eyes, but take him up on his word. He leads you back to the other, Kuon frantically waving over to the two of you the second you pass through the door.

"Y/n! Come sit with me!" She yells excitedly. Maybe you were wrong about her.

after that interaction, the three of you were all on much better terms

yes, kuon still had her habits, but he toned them WAY down after you explained to her how it made you feel

she teased the hell out of you for it too

you, of course, shrugged it off

but you never told her that she was wrong

you were happy to be on good terms with Sniper Mask again

he made a lot more time for you

your old interactions coming back at full force, and some new ones

he loved to take you on little walks on the high rises

he also made it a point to teach you how to shoot his rifle

which was terrifying, but exhilarating

you fell for him harder and harder every day

one day, you ranted your feelings out to Kuon

and while she wasn't surprised, it warmed her heart to see how much you loved him

yes, she crushed on him too, but that didn't take away from the obvious connection she saw between the two of you

unbeknownst to you, Sniper Mask had come to her about the same things

his usually cold demeanor broke whenever he talked with you

he genuinely enjoyed your company, he wanted more of it

and then some

so, she put a plan together

operation "get Mr. Mask and Y/n together" is a go!

she took it all very seriously

making sure you guys get paired together for scouting missions? that's all her

convincing Sniper Mask to get you little gifts and things? of course

overall, the best wing-woman you could ask for

however, the one thing she didn't have anything to do with was his confession to you

he could have used her help with it, that much was clear

but he wanted to tell you how he felt, no help necessary

Sniper Mask had told you earlier this morning to meet you at his room when the sunset before he rushed to get out of your vicinity like you were a plague. Granted, it hurt your feelings, but you couldn't stand him up.

You knocked gently on the wooden door, stepping back and waiting patiently for it to open. After about a minute, while you had heard nothing, you went to knock again.

Your efforts were proved useless as the door swung open hastily, revealing a disheveled Sniper Mask. His usual blazer and fedora were long forgotten, his hair messy, strands pointing this way and that. His mask sat lopsided on his face, still covering it fully.

"H-hey Y/n." He mumbled out, you offered him a wave as he awkwardly shuffled to the side, opening the door as an incentive for you to come in. You stepped inside, walking to the center of the room as you heard him close the door behind you.

You turned to speak to him again, but those thoughts were cast aside as you felt his hands settle onto your cheeks and his lips molding with yours. It startled you, you're eyes open in shock as you looked at him. His mask was completely off, thrown somewhere in the room, but he didn't seem to have a care in the world.

You quickly melted into the kiss, bringing your hands up to gently hold onto his forearms. He hummed, taking a moment before pulling away, leaving the two of you to gasp for air as he rested his forehead against yours. You opened your eyes to meet his, full of adoration.

"I, uh, I think I'm in love with you?" It was more of a question, but you took it happily. You laughed softly, your fingers rubbing small circles in his forearms.

"Was that what that was?"

[shirtlessfelix]

Do you write for Nemesis? Is so how about him finally tracking the afab reader down and catching the reader bc you’re a member of stars and him being fed up with the cat and mouse game he just endured it leads to spicy time. Please and thank you, I really love ur stories 🤗

Thank you so much!! Very happy you do ^^ First time for everything, I hope you love this too <3 <3 Last RE request for today, but I'll continue them tomorrow! Wanted to save this one as a dirty finale :P This one's a bit more ~explicit~ than the others, so... be warned!

[M] Nemesis Gets His Vengeance

NSFW 875 words

You joined the Entity's realm long before the Nemesis ever did, and with killers like the Plague and Pyramid Head, you were prepared for the kind of fight he would put up. When you learned about his history with Jill and Leon, you immediately started thinking of ways to outsmart him and render his abilities useless, so once you got into a trial, it would be a breeze.

It seemed that way, at least.

You ran him around for the better part of multiple trials, never quite letting his tentacle close enough to infect you, running around his undead servants and proving too slippery to catch off guard. Needless to say, you give him a harder time than anybody, and he lives for the trial when he finally gets his hands on you.

Much to his pleasure, saving the best survivor for last was a good plan since he caught you trying to be a good teammate with a last-minute unhook. For you, though, this meant being grabbed off of the other survivor and carried under the Nemesis' arm, kicking and flailing to escape his impossible grasp. "Gotcha now," he grumbles and carries you off into a corner.

He ignores the existence of the hatch merely so he can take his time with you. All that running around and teasing him, you're frustrated that he finally caught you and that he refuses to let go. His grip on you twists your clothes out of position, so you try to pull it back with no sign of success. It's tiring more than unpleasant, the way he's messing with you, but you can't help but wonder what he could possibly want.

Nemesis isn't one to follow the rules. With you still under his arm, he takes a hand and covers your ass with it as he grips your clothed cheek. You gasp at the feeling of his rough hands on your skin, pinching under your shorts just to feel you now that you're finally his. It's kind of exhilarating... maybe this is what you wanted.

You feel his fingers slip further down between your legs, rubbing through your shorts and making you yell out in exasperation and pleasure, never thinking this is why he wanted to catch you so badly. Finally, he puts you down, the lingering feeling of his fingers on you leaving you frozen in front of him.

He looks at you intensely before his tentacle lashes out from his arm and waves in front of you. He slithers it down your shirt, pulling at the fabric and eventually sliding it down all the way to expose your breasts to the cool air of the realm. The end of the appendage flicks your nipple before snaking its way lower down, rubbing between your legs again and teasing the hem of your shorts.

You shiver, your knees buckle, and before you know it, he's lifting you up and pinning you against the wall, using his free hand to slide your shorts and panties down all in one go, chuckling to himself as he watches you drip for him. Spreading your legs and hiking you up with a leg, the Nemesis rubs between your folds, hard and right where he needs to for you to moan out. You open yourself up for him, practically begging for him to do anything he wants to you, but he doesn't take the bait just yet.

He leans forward and slides his tongue over your nipples, long and short strokes over the buds as he slides two thick fingers inside you, pumping roughly and continuing to rub you with his thumb. By now, you're already overstimulated, but you need more. You plead for more with your quivering lips and desperate hisses for all of him.

The tentacle slinks out again and slides between your cheeks, teasing and rubbing against you as his fingers slow down and eventually pull out. He turns your head down to watch as he rubs himself through the fabric of his coat, eventually pulling it aside and freeing his cock that throbs for you. You try to push yourself down onto it, but it's too far; he knows he's teasing you so badly.

He rubs the tip against your lips and all between your folds, the tentacle still holding onto you tight as he lowers you down onto him and thrusts into you slowly at first, but quickly increasing his pace. You've never felt anything quite like him before, especially not the extra appendage teasing your other hole.

The scalding muscle inside of you drives you absolutely wild, and the more your voice cracks in pleasure, the more Nemesis wants to keep going. Despite being a mutation, even he has to stop at some point, but only when he's completely released himself and left you on the ground for a while just to watch you come down from your high.

He figures he'll let you enjoy it for a little longer before carrying you to the open hatch, where you'll return to the campfire like nothing ever happened, but with the memory of what did happen still fresh in your mind. You'll keep him on his toes more often if it means he'll keep you longer again.

[tommybaholland]

hi!! if requests are still open, can you maybe do midoriya, bakugo, and shinso meeting mc who's like maki zenin? like theyd be quirkless but theyre unnaturally strong bc of what a heavenly restriction is in the bnha verse?

their quirkless and strong s/o

featuring: midoriya, bakugo, and shinso

midoriya

he’d be able to relate to your situation because, at one point, he was powerless. however, he wouldn’t use that word to describe you at all. you may not have a named quirk but you’re physically very strong and your resilient personality aligns with that strength. he remembers how weak and helpless he felt when he wanted to be a hero but didn’t have a power of his own. you are exactly the opposite and seem to embrace your differences from others. 

upon meeting you, he’d want to know everything about you and your seemingly ‘phantom quirk.’ not because he wants to know your weaknesses but rather that he’s truly interested, just as he is with everyone else’s abilities. as far as he was concerned, your only weakness seemed to be that you don’t have a quirk but it was clear that you’d overcome that long ago. 

watching you fight is truly a spectacle for him because you’ve got strength, agility, and use special weapons during combat that only you can use. your close combat skills were easily the best which wasn’t all that surprising. he couldn’t imagine how many hours you had trained to get to this level and to show everyone who said it couldn’t be done that you could be a hero.

he was absolutely over the moon when you began dating. you really bonded over your experiences with having to adapt to your situations. you liked that he really listened to you and found it endearing that he would remember the littlest things that you had told him, even things that you don’t remember telling him. he appreciates all the encouragement and guidance that you give him as he navigates his path to becoming the world’s greatest hero. the only caveat is he hasn’t told you all about one for all and that’s what kills him. he wanted you to be the first to know his secret and he can only hope that you’ll understand once the time comes for him to explain himself.

bakugo

at first, he’d only see you as a weak and quirkless loser with baseless confidence that you could be a hero. if there’s anything he hates more, it’s people who think they can do the impossible. how could people call him arrogant when you’re doing too much with your useless ‘power.’ like, your power was actually useless, how are you going to be a hero. in his mind, there was no way and you’d be severely injured or dead in a short matter of time. 

he really just thought you were a cheater because you had all of these weapons and support items that were made specifically to give you a leg up in battle. you would just say that he was a hypocrite because of those bulky gauntlets that he uses. he counters with, “these were specially made for me, someone who’s not a quirkless loser. now GO DIE!” unfortunately, you had already been two steps ahead and smacked him from behind with your staff, propelling him forward and onto the ground. everyone was amazed as it seemed like no one could shake his guarded nature. 

he had to admit that maybe you weren’t so weak and fragile after all. it just made him want to challenge you more and more but pretty much every time he fought you, you put him on his butt each time. he was frustrated beyond belief, especially over the fact that someone with no real power was beating him; he couldn’t let that happen. there was one day that he finally got the drop on you, effectively blasting you onto your back. then you did the most annoying and embarrassing thing by congratulating him and holding out your hand for him to shake. he took it begrudgingly, your strong grip nearly breaking his hand. 

in the end, he decided that it would be better to have you on his side. it’s just embarrassing that he actually developed feelings for you and he’s dating you. regardless of whether you’re together or not, he’ll never stop challenging you to a fight...or worshipping the ground you walk on.

shinso

he wouldn’t really have an opinion about you but he does envy you. sometimes he wishes he didn’t have a quirk at all if given the choice between that and the one he has now. even if you don’t have power, you’re still more eligible than him to become a hero given how strong and capable you are. but he figured that if someone like you can have faith in your abilities, there’s no reason why he shouldn’t believe in himself. 

for as long as he could remember, others always made sure he was aware of the rather incriminating things he could do with his power. the discouraging was that they weren’t wrong. he could be a villain if he wanted. but he chose not to because that would just satisfy everyone else’s opinions of him and so he wanted to prove them wrong. hearing about a quirkless student in the hero course pushed him to be able to show that he could also be capable of becoming a hero.

when he first met you, he thought that there was something about you that was appealing. you were tough and didn’t let other people walk all over you and you never seemed to let discouragement get to you. like him, you used several support items during combat but your close combat alone was already enough to take anyone out. watching you fight was unlike anything he had ever seen before and also, you were very pretty. he had only realized this after you had told him that you don’t consider yourself to be without a quirk but rather born with a restriction that only made you stronger. 

somehow, someway, he had ended up working up enough courage to ask you to go out on a date with him and he doesn’t regret that one bit. he loves being with you and feeling like he finally has someone to relate to but can learn a lot from also. he thought you were so cute when he was teaching you how to use his binding cloth and you got all tangled up in it. now he really had a reason to become a hero; to be your hero hopefully one day.

bring it on, bnha night! let’s see, what’s next??

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Syd | ruboo

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[robinofgothamcity]

♡ prompt: "falling in love with her wasn't apart of my plan but I'm not mad if it happens."

♡ pairing: leo valdez x latina, fem! reader

♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / my schedule is going to become more sporadic starting this week :/ but also, writing for Leo is my ultimate favorite thing to do bc I'M MEXICAN AND SO IS HE AND I JUST GET TO UNLEASH ALL MY MEXICANESS INTO ONE FANFIC.

being the daughter of Nemesis, it wasn't unusual to see you messing with the Hermes cabin....a lot. your partners in crime were the Stoll brothers. all the meanwhile, everyone who saw the three of you together knew to book it. it usually meant that all of you pulled a prank and they were terrified to know which cabin it was that got shit end of the stick.

it was usually ended up being the Demeter kids considering they were so easy to prank. you swore that Demeter was going to bite you in the ass one day for how much you messed with her kids but you couldn't lie, they were so easily prankable that it was hard not to do it.

"I'M GOING TO HURT YOU!" you heard someone scream as you and the Stoll brothers ran away from the cabin. the three of you booked it until you saw them stop and ultimately give up, "NO YOU WON'T!" you yelled back jokingly before you accidentally ran into someone.

you heard the chuckles of Travis and Connor as you looked up, "sorry Leo, didn't see you there," you murmured. he gave you his hand, helping you up as Travis and Connor started mocking you, "it's okay but be careful! wouldn't want your beautiful face to get all messed up," your eyes widened, right alongside's Travis who started going into hysterics.

"thanks Leo, at least someone knows how to treat a woman," you poked back to Travis who immediately stood quiet. Leo laughed, "no problem but here, you got some grease on your cheek," he said, seeing the slash of it on your face. he pulled his sleeve out a bit and tried wiping it off, "uh, you kinda made it worse," Connor inquired.

Travis smacked his brother, sensing that this was not the time to make a joke. he quickly dragged himself along with Connor away as you got left with Leo, "I still think you look pretty," he tried to rationalize. he knew the story behind you and knew if you managed to take what he did the wrong way, he would be at the receiving end of a prank and no one ever wanted to be involved in a prank that had your name attached with Travis and Connor.

"have a mirror in your bunker? don't really feel like walking all the way to my cabin to clean it off," you admitted. Leo nodded excitedly, practically grabbing your hand and dragging you away, "course I do. gotta see this perfect face somehow," you giggled at his comment making Leo proud that he wasn't scaring you off yet.

the bunker from where you were originally wasn't too far but when you stepped in, you couldn't help but stand at the doorway, stunned at the organized mess he had inside. "you build a lot, don't you?" you asked. Leo saw the way stared mesmerized at the unfinished project, "yeah, half of these aren't done yet and I haven't even started on those yet but that's what happen when you're the son of Hephaestus," he groaned.

you saw the mirror that was on the wall and wiped it away with a clean rag. as you finished up, you heard music playing lowly throughout the bunker.

"is that....Banda MS?" you asked, whipping your head around to get a clear answer. Leo and you both stared at each other in complete shock, "NO WAY!" you both screamed. you immediately felt a tug at Leo, getting some sense of familiarity from him, "my dad used to blast this song all the time as a kid!" you exclaimed happily.

Leo didn't respond as he was still too much in shock to process what was going on. he hadn't met anyone who ever recognized the music he listened to when he worked. it's one of the memories he had with his mom was that she blared this music when they used to work on things together, "my mom did too," he replied. you found the tiny remote and turned it up as you sat in shock.

"sorry but I really haven't heard this music play in years, it brings back so many memories of my dad," you confessed, "holy Hera I might start crying," you laughed, trying not to cry in the process.

"Me gustas, te gusto, pa qué nos hacemos? te llevo la banda y nos amanecemos. seré detallista, me encantas la neta, te lleno de rosas mis dos camionetas. no es por presumir, pero soy buena opción, bonita pareja haríamos tú y yo, Piénsalo."

you sang out the lyrics right alongside Leo as the two of you immediately felt in your own little world. Jason, who was passing by Bunker Nine with Piper, poked his head in when he heard Leo's singing voice.

"no way," he whispered to Piper who managed to jump over her boyfriend to poke her head inside, "a girl is in his bunker? holy Hera," she murmured to him as Jason stared at his best friend in pride. Jason knew if anyone deserved a girlfriend, it was Leo. despite the front Leo put up constantly, he knew Leo craved love from a significant other so to see you inside of the bunker, not only singing to music in Spanish but to actually understand Leo from a side no one else could made Jason proud of him.

"I have a bunch of music on my iPod I always play in my cabin since Damien is hardly inside, it doesn't really bother anyone," you mentioned as you took it out. Leo quickly put the iPod on the adapter and played the first song which happened to be 'Se Amerita' by Junior H, "I usually played it around Jason and the others but they didn't really understand so it didn't really bother them."

you heard your name being yelled by Travis from across the camp making you sigh. Leo felt himself deflate, realizing that you were leaving, "talk to ya later? I'm pretty sure one of those got caught in a prank and are going to use me as an escape tactic," you murmured, jumping off of the stool.

"bye Amor!" you turned around, not expecting the nickname so suddenly, "goodbye Valdez," you replied, giving him a wink.

you walked out of his bunker, not noticing Jason or Piper who were hiding on the side as you sped off to Travis. Jason and Piper walked in, giving Leo the biggest shit eating grin they had ever had on their faces, "well, well, well, what was that?" Piper asked, "flirting it up with the daughter of Nemesis are we?" Jason added on.

"shut up, it wasn't even-," Leo looked to Jason who immediately told him to cut the shit, "falling in love with her wasn't apart of my plan but I'm not mad if it happens," he confessed, slamming the tool on the table and running his hands through his brown hair.

Piper couldn't believe her ears. Leo had said he had fallen in love multiple times over multiple women he had met but this one felt real. it felt almost raw.

"you didn't tell her that, did you?" Jason asked, now in a kind of panic. Leo shook his head no, "okay good but honestly, it's really surprising. everyone in the camp kind of assume her and Travis had a thing considering how much time they spend with each other," Piper said out loud.

bingo.

that was the thing that was throwing Leo off. he saw the way you acted around Travis. it wasn't the way you were around Connor. you seemed really close to Travis. the two of you were secretive with each other. just know, he heard Travis calling for you and although you were reluctant to go, he felt some kind of competition with the older Stoll brother.

"no, I don't think they see each other that way, they have more of a sibling relationship if I have to be honest," thank you Jason for being the voice of reason, Leo thought. he stood up and stretched himself, "well, if the Gods want us together then so be it but if they don't...I'm going to make em," he joked.

the following morning was thankfully a Saturday. no training was mandatory and it gave everyone a chance to sleep in. Leo tended to be a late sleeper on these days but as he was getting up to go to the mess hall, he heard your laughs from the campfire area. you were sitting with Travis, looking at a notebook with something written inside it as Travis let out another laugh.

Leo felt himself getting slightly jealous as he went for his late morning snack. you had given a bright smile, one that made him melt on the inside, and a wave before going back to talking to Travis. he hadn't seen Connor around so he figured that it was just the two of you which didn't make his jealousy dim down any less.

you had ditched the plans of pranking the Ares cabin with Travis as he wiggled his eyebrows, joking that you were replacing him with Leo.

"hey Leo, what're you up to?" you asked, scaring him a bit. he shrugged, showing you the snacks in his hands, "late sleeper, huh?" you asked. you could sense the slightly different mood Leo was in, in comparison to yesterday, "well, if you need any help with anything, I'll be free all day," you mentioned, hoping he'd invite you to maybe help him in some kind of project.

Leo nodded, not saying anything back before heading back to his bunker. he didn't know if it was just his heart playing with him but the way you were around Travis made him irrationally angry. it was as if only he could be that way around you. Leo knew one of his downsides as a person was being extremely clingy and having a bit too much faith in someone but he was hoping that if he placed all his marbles into a bowl that maybe you'd reciprocate the feelings he got for you just as quickly as he did.

"what're you doing in here trapped?" Jason asked, a little later in the day. Leo continued working on his useless project as he didn't respond, "dude, are you listening? I would think you'd be with ( your name ), trying to ask her out and all," Jason reiterated.

Leo slammed his nail gun down on the table, frightening Jason.

"I saw her with Travis earlier, giggling and laughing with him so I figured that maybe Piper was right and that they like each other," he admitted, frustration evident in his voice, "gods you're in idiot," Jason screamed to Leo as it was Leo's turn to be left in confusion.

Jason sat down on the wooden chair in annoyance.

"( your name ) is currently by herself by lake and you're in here moping around because of a scenario you made in your head?" he practically yelled. Leo was about to speak up when Jason cut him off again, "I told you already, she is like Travis' sister! what're you not getting? I heard what she told you this morning and now she's alone when she could be in here with you!" he yelled, shaking Leo's shoulders.

Leo took a step back, letting what Jason was telling him sink in. once it finally processed, he put his tool down and took his belt off, "think she'll be down for me to join her?" Leo asked him. Jason nodded yes, "go to her you idiot! it's about time you found your soulmate and you're about to ruin it!"

Jason remained in the cabin as Leo quickly walked out. he went to the place where Jason had told him you were currently at and thankfully, you were still there. you were poking the water with a stick before chucking a large rock inside of it. something Percy probably would've yelled at you for.

"what're you doing here alone?" he asked, walking up behind you. you instantly perked up, "I'm bored and didn't really have anything to do today so I usually go to the lake to throw rocks," you replied as Leo got comfortable next to you, "I thought you'd be working on some project right now."

Leo shook his head, "figured you'd probably want to help me start a new project. I don't know how great the daughters of Nemesis are at building things but I can imagine someone as gorgeous and smart as you can be of help," he flirted as he noticed the flustered reaction.

"me vas a matar estupido," you joked, pushing him playfully. Leo shook his head, "how can I kill me reina? it would be really stupid of me." you didn't bother to reply as you let out a flustered laugh.

Leo took in the situation as you grew quiet. the slight Long Island breeze made your hair get pushed back as Leo thanked his lucky stars. Leo knew he went through hell and back. literally. and maybe it was finally time he got what he deserved in return.

never did he think he would be at the receiving end of good karma. his life until recently had put him through trials and tribulations that he didn't think he'd make it out of but thankfully, he did and when he did, he figured that's when the God's placed you in his life. the gorgeous daughter of Nemesis.

"well, let's get crackin' partner," you said getting up. Leo nodded, grabbing your wrist and practically dragging you away to his bunker, "whatever you say reina," he replied, finding comfort in the nickname he gave you.

[kannra21]

Sniperhaul fanfic

ˡᵐᵃᵒ ᶦ ᶜᵃⁿ'ᵗ ᵇᵉˡᶦᵉᵛᵉ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᶦ'ᵐ ᵈᵒᶦⁿᵍ ᵗʰᶦˢ

Overhoe finally broke out of Tartarus after a very long time. However, he couldn't have done it without the help of a certain villain mistress. 😏 Who's she and why did she choose to help this terrible (x2) man? Find out bellow.

characters: overhaul (chisaki kai) x sniper lady

word count: 3k

warnings: angst, past memories, handless overhaul, hurt, comfort, gangs, yakuza, just girl taking care of her mans

notes: I'd like to thank the person responsible for proofreading this work bc I'm supposed to keep their identity a secret. 😎 Thank you once again! And of course, the manga and characters belong to Kohei Horikoshi. @meefal you were excited to see the final product so here you go, hope you like it. 🖤

✂-------------------------------------------------------

Overhaul couldn't remember how long he'd been there, he'd lost count weeks ago. The only thing he knew was that he was in "Tartarus", a prison located 5km off the coast of the Mainland. It may function like a conventional prison, but in reality, those who're deemed a severe threat toward the safety of the nation were locked up and monitored closely, regardless of whether their sentence has been decided on yet. The facility was divided into 6 levels, where the potential threat level of criminals was deemed "higher" the further underground you go. It's a prison where, once you enter, there's no chance of leaving.

He sat there in his cell, B10 being the lowest level in solitary confinement. It was too cold for his head to function and too dark for his eyes to see, with the small window above the prison doors being his only source of light. There was also an opening where prisoners received their meals, but considering that he lost his hands, the guards could easily enter without worrying too much for their well-being. They'd leave whatever they offered that day and give him a disgusted look before locking the doors after themselves. He couldn't see his reflection nor touch his face, he probably looked like crap by now. His skin was itching and he felt disoriented from all the germs occupying this space, it's been a while since he's gone out for some fresh air. 

He was practically Quirkless and yet they locked him out in the worst, most dreadful place the isolation block had to offer. He couldn't even feed himself properly, he couldn't do anything by himself whatsoever. But there was only one thing left to him; he spent days and days thinking about pops, Chrono, yakuza and everything he could have if it weren't for those stupid heroes-- no, if it weren't for his plan that so grandiosely failed. It made him feel miserable, desperate even, and with grief soon followed acceptance. It was all his fault, and he needed to live with this burden for the rest of his life. Because of him, pops is still handicapped to the bed somewhere, wherever the heroes might have taken him. 

He stood up and started beating the cell with his leg, curing his frustrations. He didn't know why he was doing it, it was irrational and he's hurting himself unnecessarily, but for some reason it made him feel lighter. At least he could transfer some of his inner pain to the outside world. Other criminals laughed at his patheticness, especially since they knew why the guards were allowed to enter his cell. They shouted that it was impossible to escape, but he wasn't trying to. He knew that it was useless a long time ago. 

Midnight came and all the prisoners mostly fell asleep. Overhaul, however, couldn't sleep a wink. Because of the dark room he spent most of his days in, he lost his sense of time so he was pacing around, deep in thought. He couldn't dream of anything nice anyways. 

"Can't fall asleep either?" a feminine voice could be heard from the other side. Wait. They allowed women here? What could she have possibly done to deserve such punishment? 

He leaned his back on the doors and slid down to the floor, trying to find the right words.

"Yes." he sighed, enthusiasm lacking in his voice "But it's not like I need you to talk about my problems." 

"Hm, whatever. Go beat your head against the bars. Fall unconscious, loser."

The man snorted, which might as well be his first time he ever did that. 

"Well, this certainly sounds effective. It's not like I have anything to lose anyways." 

"Hey." the tone of her voice was earnest, and it aroused further questions in his jumbled up head. 

"What?"

"We're going to get out of here." 

Is she being serious now? "Really? Because as far as I know, we're locked out here for good. We don't even know the severity of our sentences. They can do whatever they want with us."

"Not quite. You know that they're being supervised by 'The Hearts and Mind' party offshoots. They can’t do a thing to us as long as they have their heads to the pikes." 

This might be true, but he didn't believe in anything the government's been telling them lately. It's only a matter of time before they switch their plans and play by their own rules, because stabbing people in the back was the only thing they've ever been good at. 

"How did you end up here?" 

Oh the long-awaited question. She wondered when he'd ask. 

"It's not like I need you to talk about my problems."

He smiled, he liked this vicious side of hers. But he also realized that she could be nice as well because if that wasn't the case, she wouldn't spread promises of the escape. At least that's what he thought. 

"Sorry about that." 

"It's okay. We've all been here for a very long time, now weren't we? We lose our cool and act like total assholes."

"Direct and straight to the point I see." his deadpan voice could be heard from the other side of the bars. 

"'Been raised this way, for the better or worse." it didn't sound like she was bragging, yet it felt like she was just talking about herself, honest and confident, to cover up what she felt was wrong. The incoming topic which she'd rather avoid. 

The villainess didn't want to open up about her past, so she just answered his question. 

"I killed people beyond counting, following AFO's orders. He always wished to become the world's greatest demon lord and thus promised us enormous change in the hero society. So in order to achieve that, he needed his underlings. And that's how I ended up here."

"You were loyal till the end."

"You know what they say; there can be no progress nor achievement without certain sacrifice."

Wise beyond her years and just as sad. He wondered how her face looked like, how the world's been treating her. 

"I had my own sacrifices as well."

"Do you regret them?"

...

"I do." 

Now it was her turn to snort "Really? And I thought that people situated this low couldn't have regrets. You remember what they said about us. 'Beasts in human clothing', 'Simply dreadful beings'." 

He felt insulted, maybe the things she said were true but it's not like he was anything similar to these pigs he shared the same air with, unfortunately.

"I regret hurting the person important to me. The old man who once took me in when I was very young. He was the infamous boss of Shie Hassaikai." 

Something clicked in her, it's such a small world they're living in, "Yakuza? I know you guys. We used to trade with you back in the days."

"Todou Gang?" 

"You said it."

"But... you were a force to be reckoned with. One day you just collapsed and not a single trace could be found. According to certain sources, there was no way anyone could determine the exact cause of your downfall. So what happened?" 

"I killed them all." 

... 

"AFO told me to kill them to prove my loyalty to him and, of course, to make sure that there was no one I could turn to other than himself." 

For some questionable reasons, and he didn't dare to admit that it was empathy he felt towards a random stranger and a former gang member he shared some history with, Overhaul wanted to fill the silence that lingered between them. Perhaps, because he felt guilty for making her reveal more than what she initially intended. 

"I used pops' niece, a 6-year-old girl who had an extraordinary Quirk; it allowed her to rewind a person's body back to a certain state. That means she could put a body back to before it was injured or before the person even developed a Quirk. With that, I wanted to create a Quirk-erasing drug to get rid of the Quirk society altogether and to make sure that yakuza could rise once again. I cut her skin every day to take blood samples and to test her regenerative abilities. However, pops didn't approve of it, so I handicapped him to the bed and planned on waking him up the moment I realized my plan, to make him proud of the achievement. Unfortunately, it didn't play out as I wanted and I never reached him."

The silence followed and the woman wore a disheartening smile on her face. It's not the answer she expected, she didn't ask for another sad story from another messed up person she's met in her life. But the intentions were pure and for her, it was good enough. 

"We both fought for something only to lose it all, huh?" she laughed, but it was prominent in her tone that it was bittersweet. 

"At least you're brought here in one piece." 

"At least you can still revive your parent."

Were they comforting each other? Were they jealous of each other? Were they wallowing in self-pity? They couldn't tell. The only thing they certainly could was the embarrassment they felt from the moment they realized that some of the prisoners were eavesdropping and making fun of their vulnerabilities. See? That's what they hated the most about opening up about themselves; they were worried about their feelings being perceived as a joke. The only way to protect themselves was to rise up the walls and never let anyone get closer, except they didn't regret exchanging a word or two, as long as it was the two of them. 

The next day, 8:34PM Mainland-side entrance, the guardians of 'The Bronze Gate' announced a code red security lockdown. Panic and shouting could be heard from across the hall and the security alarm announced the potential danger. 

"Close any and all passageways on each floor. All workers are to enforce strict measures to maintain order."

"The surveillance system is down! It seems like we've been hit by some sort of EMP attack!"

Static waves were spreading around the metal frames and the prison doors of the isolation block unlocked. Overhaul could hear the commotion outside and the villains leaving their cells in a hurry, but as much as he tried, he couldn't push the heavy doors open.

"3 seconds until we're back online- wait... What the... With the system down we can't monitor the inside!"

"Nice, 3 seconds be damned." he beat the door with his legs, pushed the surface with his shoulders, leaned all of his weight on the godforsaken thing just so it could finally open. Nothing. It seems like he lost a couple of pounds during his stay here. He couldn't believe his eyes, this couldn't be happening to him. After all this time of patient waiting and hoping to meet pops once again, it turns out he'd be the only one still trapped and all because he didn't have any hands. He panicked, he really couldn't decide on what to do next. But then he remembered-

"Go beat your head against the bars, loser."

That's it! This might be his only chance to escape! He didn't have much time left though, he could hear the shooting nearby so he definitely needed to hurry.

"The system won't come back on!! The ones in solitary confinement are breaking out!! Inside!"

"Control unit's on site!! Execute lockdown in the isolation block!"

"Follow procedure! If even one of them steps a foot outside their cell-"

"Fire!! Open fire!!"

Muscular threw whatever he could find in this messed up place back at them, excitement prominent in his big smile "You ain't gonna kill me with those puny toys! So how about you show me the exit already?!" 

Other villains were joining him, still overwhelmed by the sudden freedom they've been given "Dammit... After all that time..."

"Meat..." Moonfish mumbled as he cut his opponents with his blade-like teeth. 

The villain lady joined them in the run, still carefully examining her surroundings in case they were tricked into something, "The system isn't responding to my Quirk. 'Guess Tartarus really is falling." 

As she was running down the corridor, she could hear beating noises coming from one of the doors. It sounded dull so the person must have been using their head. 

"Eh, don't tell me the idiot actually listened to my advice. He must be desperate." 

She came to the doors and turned the circular lock in a hurry. She really didn't want to stay in this place any longer, but she couldn't leave him behind either. It's not like she could use him for anything since he was basically handless and Quirkless so why was she doing it? She didn't have an answer. Maybe it was their talk from the other day, maybe because they were both gang members with a history, maybe because of her regrets and her wish to do something right for once. Or maybe because she was just this kind. Nah, this couldn't be it, she never did anything in her life that didn't require a certain purpose. She cast her heart aside a long time ago and did what was necessary for the accomplishment of the mission. It would be weird if she suddenly started using her heart again, now wouldn't it? She was AFO's personal assassin, there was simply no way. 

He came out of the room with eyes wide in puzzlement. He was finally free and ready to find pops so he could possibly revive him and try to fix things as much as he could.

They looked at each other for the first time. They never said it aloud, godforbid, but they liked the other's eyes. And perhaps the eyes were a window to a person's soul, their broken souls, tormented by the life's temptations. They were still so young, probably in their twenties, and yet they looked older at the same time. Maybe because of the seriousness in their faces, their stronger stance, the way they defied their fate. They were destined to fall apart, no one would argue with it, but circumstances drove them to take action and rise from the bottomless chasm. And now they had each other. 

"We need to get out of here," she stated and pulled him by the sleeve that hung loosely from his shoulder. They escaped Tartarus and raided a small shop near the coast to change clothes and to mingle into the public unnoticed. She quickly picked out a dress and threw herself at work while Overhaul was still standing by the shop display, looking out for the potential intruders.

He couldn't erase the thought of this being some sort of a really weird first date; the girl coming out of the stall and the guy examining her looks. He shook his head, he never had this kind of thoughts in his entire life. He needed to pull himself together. 

The bob-hair came out and adjusted the ammo on her utility belt. He looked at her from the corner and she was stunning; intimidating with a tad bit of femininity in design. He stood there and watched how good it fit her curvy form. The thoughts wandering in his head sounded so wrong, terribly wrong. He needed to bring himself to stop. 

"Oh right, I almost forgot." she took a shirt off the shelf and came to him, showing him the garment in her hands "You need a little help, right?" 

"Sure.'' his voice was small and he stood still while she undid his buttons. Maybe from the outside he looked completely calm, but from the inside he was a complete mess. He looked at her face and wondered if she knew, the kind of effect she's having on him. She raised her head and he looked to the side, there's no way he could look her in the eyes at this point. He hoped she didn't notice. 

"You like this one, don't you?" she asked, filling the awkward silence. 

"Looks don't matter, the most important thing is to change and avoid getting caught." She looked annoyed. Great. He wanted to shove his head though the wall. Wait… Why was he thinking that? 

"I choose the clothes I like. It makes me feel better in my skin."

"You look good in it."

She looked at him surprised and he quickly corrected himself "the dress looks good."

"Sure." she trailed off and put the new shirt over his shoulders. She could feel his muscles tensing. This was probably because of the cool air, she assured herself. 

"Why did you break me out of Tartarus? It's not like I could be of any use to you." 

She buttoned up his shirt and fixed the wrinkled parts on the garment, hand accidentally brushing over the left side of his chest, feeling his heartbeat.

Well... that was a surprise.

"I thought that maybe you could be of some use to the demon lord. Not Quirk-wise, but you may offer a valuable set of information. Something that the demon lord would appreciate greatly." she could feel it slowing down and her heart dropped just as much.

"But also because I... liked you."

He looked at her incredulously and she smiled. She pinched him to bring him out of the trance and he complained. "Don't be awkward, say something."

"I like you too... I, this is my first time I ever said this to anyone. It's weird."

She slapped him gently on the shoulder and he reached to take it but, yea, no hands.

"What the hell?"

"You're the one who's weird. But I guess that I like you this way." she stood on her toes and kissed his cheek "Ew, you should definitely shave though. No doubt about it."

The former yakuza boss swore; he'll never understand women. But for some reason he couldn't deny that he was particularly drawn to this one. He wondered if pops would approve of her.

[himboarcher]

reasons i've seen folks say that grad critics hate grad:

they hate travis (in fairness, i’ve def seen some comments of people shitting on trav for the sake of shitting on trav, but it’s not super common and typically gets downvoted into oblivion on reddit.)

it's not balance / travis isn't griffin (???????)

they hate neurodivergent people (again, in fairness, i have seen a handful of comments that could come across this way! but most of the time when travis being ADHD or his NPD is brought up, it's by defenders saying that criticizing travis is ableist because he's neurodivergent or, in one particular comment, infantilizing him bc of it and literally comparing grad to putting a kid's artwork on the fridge. there were some comments early on that pointed to him being a narcissist as the reason for things people disliked about grad, but everyone seems to have realized that that's a shitty train of thought and left it behind.)

they're just toxic haters (again, there are a small handful of people like this because this is the internet, but the genuine criticism greatly outweighs their bullshit. i 100% think that the people, which is mostly just one dude who is also insufferable on reddit, who have been responding rudely to positive tweets under the episode announcements lately are out of line and need to stop. there's been an influx of that lately, presumably because people are frustrated that after over a year of grad going on, there's been no improvement to most of the major issues. that's still no excuse to be a dick to folks, though.)

vs some of the actual reasons i don't like grad:

the racism / racist tropes, and the way that they’ve straight up ignored this criticism and will likely never acknowledge it. pretty wild considering a core tenet of their brand is their willingness to acknowledge when they’ve messed up and do their best to course correct.

clumsy attempts at inclusion that are shallow and often end up being fairly offensive ("...ask me about my wheelchair," anyone?)

on a related note: i don't think that travis had bad intentions, but as an nonbinary person, it feels othering to me that travis only has enby characters give others their pronouns unprompted. i'm thinking specifically of kai here. having listened to their introduction, i don't think it's as bad or awkward as some people have said, but i can't remember travis ever having another NPC tell the PCs their pronouns, especially not a cis character. it's not a huge deal, but it's something that rubbed me the wrong way. admittedly, i don't think it would bother me so much if travis hadn't dropped the ball so much with performative inclusion in the past.

okay i'm putting the rest under a read more because even without getting into all of the problems i have with it, this got Long.

little to no player agency. player choices are ultimately meaningless and have little to no effect on the world. even when he seems to go along with a plan they come up with, it always ends with them having to go back to travis' pre-written script (see: subpoenaing the xorn, but not really because they had to go with travis' original plan of "send the xorn home through the rift".) the players repeatedly get told things about what they think or feel or what they've been doing to an unnecessary degree. fitzroy is the only one who really gets space to play and decide things for himself, and that's only because travis has decided he's the main character.

the NPCs are all too nice and willing to give the PCs anything they ask for and more, unless the PCs are trying to follow their own plan and then the NPCs are completely useless. but honestly, aside from gray, all of the NPCs are just.... nice. travis refuses to even let his antagonists be mean or cruel or even more than just slightly rude, because that'd be a bummer and we don't want that! the "twist" of gordy the lich king actually being polite and chill is not a twist at all because everyone is like that in this world. the NPCs are also wildly overpowered, but then suddenly absolutely useless when the PCs actually want their help.

too many cliffhangers that are dropped immediately at the beginning of the next episode. i feel bad for travis because so many of these cliffhangers actually set up good momentum and seemed like things were gonna get interesting, but almost every single time he just dropped them at the beginning of the next episode. like when althea showed up to interview the boys and the next episode started with travis being like "actually you went to sleep, she said she'll be back tomorrow!"

that time travis specifically said in his exposition dump that the thundermen left their horses behind because they thought the centaurs might be offended by them riding horses, only to later on rag on them for being surprised that the centaurs had horses they could ride.....

also the centaur arc in general, but i already listed racism above, so.

the way that the toxic positivity and parasocial tendencies in the mcelroy fandoms have made a large portion of the fandom take ANY criticism as a personal attack on travis and/or on themselves for enjoying something others consider bad, either morally or just quality-wise. it’s okay to admit that something you like has problematic elements or just isn’t as good as it once was. you can and should engage critically with the media you consume.

related to above: the way travis has handled genuine criticism, which is to throw public tantrums on his twitter or make weird passive aggressive tweets & ultimately ignore all the genuine criticism and advice he's been offered by claiming it's all subjective, even after he specifically asked for it and set up an email for folks to send in genuine, objective advice for him (after he threw a tantrum on twitter and replied to someone's criticism publicly, which resulted in his followers dogpiling on that person bc how dare they insult their internet best friend). while i was writing this last night, he actually announced that he’s taking a break from Twitter and acknowledged that he’s been using it as an echo chamber where he can easily get validation from folks, and honestly i’m happy for him that he’s recognized this problem and is stepping away for a while! i hope he’ll genuinely use this time to reflect on how he’s been behaving and find a more healthy way to use social media. i’m leaving this point in because i think his Twitter being such a positive echo chamber was encouraging him to do stuff like this, and him somewhat acknowledging his behavior doesn’t mean it can no longer be discussed.

rainer. extremely cool concept in theory and i was very into it until that awkward "does anyone want to ask about my wheelchair?" moment. also when travis had her use her mobility aid to RAM INTO A DOOR instead of just fucking knocking???? also all the times travis has tried to force a romantic relationship between her and fitzroy, despite fitzroy displaying no interest in her in that way. also, just to clarify: as an ace person, i don’t think this is aphobic! (and it’s kind of a stretch to call it that imo, especially since griffin never explicitly said that fitzroy's aromantic!) i just think it’s weird and awkward and a little uncomfortable for me personally, mostly because it reminds me of the times i’ve been in similar situations.

less of a problem than a lot of the other stuff and more just bad writing, but the forced emotional moments. in general, nothing in grad feels earned (why are the boys heading a war? when they have multiple actual heroes with combat experience on their side and a supposedly powerful secret organization? and the thundermen are like 21 years old max and have only had like ~10 fights in the entire campaign?) but there've been a couple times where travis has tried to force unearned emotional moments, presumably because he knows people enjoyed those with the last campaigns. but the difference is that in balance, the big emotional moments happened because they were earned. in grad, it's just travis throwing a baby pegasus at us for a few minutes and then the next time she shows up, it's supposed to be a tearful goodbye.

there are absolutely no stakes. remember when the thundermen got told that if they left, gray would kill 10 students? and then they left and came back and it turns out that what gray actually meant was, "i'll tie ten students who are mostly nameless NPCs to a tree and throw some dogs at them that you can easily stop in time, then throw a tantrum because how dare you but i'll leave before you can really do anything to hurt me lol" travis did have fitzroy's magic get taken away, but like. it didn't really do anything? also all he had to get it back was be coerced into using drugs by an authority figure and trip in the woods?

we're told that the school is weird and the hero system is corrupt, but the world of nua is still presented as more of a liberal utopia than anything? althea getting fired because of a corrupt villain is the only time we've somewhat seen corruption, but even then, she was still allowed to get (what seems to me, anyway, but admittedly i don't know for sure bc nothing about the HOG makes much sense) a fairly important job from the very people who stripped her of her hero license or whatever the fuck heroes need?

travis doesn't actually seem to understand how capitalism or bureaucracy works and just chalks up everything to "red tape." also more on the rest of the boys than him specifically, but the "let's destroy capitalism!" thing turning into just pushing some filing cabinets over................... okay.

and one last piece of extremely subjective criticism: it's just kind of.... boring. i think a lot of people, myself included, would be willing to overlook 90% of the problems with graduation if it didn't feel like such a slog to get through.

also people saying that we can't or shouldn't criticize graduation because it's "free" is absolutely absurd for several reasons. first, something being free does not make it above criticism. second, there ARE people who directly financially support the show with monthly donations. three, there's a difference between something being free and something being not for profit. podcasting is their full time job. they make their living off of money made from TAZ and MBMBAM (and probably their other shows to a lesser extent). this not a fun home game that they are graciously recording and sharing with us. it is a product they are producing that they make money off of, both from ads in the episodes and merch & books based off of these podcasts. they have marketed themselves as professionals, and both griffin and travis have been on panels where they are marketed as professional DMs and appear alongside other professional DMs (which makes it incredibly frustrating when people say that travis is just a newbie DM and we can't criticize him because of that. if he's a newbie, then he should not be taking part of panels as a professional DM where he speaks as an expert). TAZ is free in the same way that an episode of NCIS is free. i may not pay for it directly, but the creators are paid to create it and profit off of me consuming this product. so saying we should be grateful for any mcelnoise that the benevolent good boys share with us and that we're not allowed to criticize it "because it's free" is absolutely wild.

[pomegranates-and-blood]

Headcannon: Shieldmaiden friend with his brothers

My Masterlist

Pairing: Ivar/Reader

Summary: “I was hoping I could request a headcanon of Ivar being nervous around a new shieldmaiden that is friends with his brothers? He finds her attractive, but that makes him nervous bc of his legs and what ppl have said all his life.”

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: My horrible attempts at whatever the fuck this ended up being, nothing else I can think of.

A/N: So yeah, I made a thing. Am I happy with the thing? Nope. Am I proud of the thing? Nopity nope. Am I gonna post it anyways and hope you guys don’t hate it? Yep.

But yeah, first time writing headcanons, first time diving head first into season 4 Ivar. I sincerely hope you like it, and idk, would love to hear your thoughts, good or bad, on this one. Thank you!

Taglist: @1950schick​​

·         You were one of the shieldmaidens to accompany Björn to the Mediterranean, and you grew close to both him and Hvitserk on the journey.

·         You joined the Great Heathen Army alongside your brother, and everyone was surprised to see Björn sprint towards you as soon as he saw your ship, lifting you off the ground in a tight embrace.

·         Although Sigurd isn’t too thrilled or interested in you, both Ubbe and Ivar are immediately drawn to you.

·         The former, because there’s rumors about how you once bested Björn when sparring with those curved swords.

·         The latter, for completely different reasons. Though, you being a great warrior does help.

·         With you being close to his brothers Ivar finds himself knowing more and more about you with every passing day, and in the midst of the war to avenge his father, with his heart heavy with pain and loss, he finds you, with your easy smiles and your friendly nature, a welcome distraction.

·         That’s what he calls it, at first. When he spends each chance he has watching you from afar, witnessing your interactions with the group of shieldmaidens you call sisters in arms; when he finds himself thinking of you late at night and early in the morning; when he realizes he misses you when you’re gone, even though he tells himself he has nothing to miss.

·         The realization that he actually feels something for you dawns on him when he sees some Dane warrior dancing with you on a feast after Aelle is conquered, and the urge to stake his claim, to go there and interrupt whatever it is that is happening before his eyes, fills him, makes an impulsive hand reach for the axe at his side.

·         Ivar is…well, Ivar, so there’s no way he’d willingly let you -or anyone else, for that matter- know that he’s interested in you.

·         Which he is. Very much so. Because, much to his growing frustration -in more ways than one- he can’t get you out of his head.

·         Still, that doesn’t mean he’d willingly disclose it. He isn’t subtle, though.

·         But people notice. His brothers notice.

·         Björn isn’t thrilled with it, but considering Aslaug isn’t alive to bend to Ivar’s will and have some poor girl forced into marriage with the youngest son of Ragnar, he isn’t too concerned. If something happens, it is because you choose it so, and that’s enough for him.

·         Ubbe bristles up. He knows bits and pieces of what happened with Margrethe, but he has been witness too many times of how Sigurd uses what happened with her against Ivar- something he swears one day will end in tragedy, thankfully nothing too difficult to contain or heal so far-; and he still feels responsible about setting up the whole thing. The last thing he wants is for it to happen again, with someone that is quickly becoming a close friend of him and his brothers.

·         And of course, Sigurd notices, and is cruelly delighted in it. He does try a couple of times teasing Ivar about it when you’re near, but you never stood for those kinds of games, so he was eventually discouraged from continuing.

·         Doesn’t stop him from privately tormenting Ivar about it. It is his duty as older brother after all, and since Ubbe is too busy mothering Ivar, and Hvitserk too busy trying to fuck his way through England, it falls unto him. He may go too far once or twice, but their relationship has always been that way.

·         Sigurd’s teasing only manages to put Ivar more and more on edge about these stupid -pathetic, useless, soft- feelings, and the few times you try getting close to him, he usually snaps at you or reacts badly.

·         Because you are very interested, even if you are much better at hiding it. Ivar proves to be incredibly smart, and with the march of the Great Heathen Army being the first time you’ve travelled this far from home, fought in so many important battles, you find yourself fascinated by him and the way he seems to understand what goes beyond fighting, what becomes war.

·         But, when you are try getting close to him with subtle flirting or soft touches, Ivar thinks you are pitying him or mocking him, and when you are more direct and try finding common ground to get to know each other, he thinks you’re pushing him away.

·         It confuses you, and frankly, it confuses him too.

·         It confuses everyone that has become an unwilling spectator to all of this.

·         Ivar does try his best at being nice to you, it just manages to backfire most of the time.

·         You could be sharing a meal with him and his brothers, and he’d try complimenting you, saying something about how you have proven to be a fine shieldmaiden. But feeling too many eyes on him, feeling like he left himself open for ridicule or rejection, he’d add something else, like how you are obviously aided by the fact you use weapons not familiar to Vikings.

·         He’d fuck most things up, is what I mean.

·         And he’d know -and you’d make it very much clear- that he has upset you, or made you angry.

·         He would try apologizing, but it is Ivar, so “I’m sorry” won’t leave his lips unless someone pries it off him, so, he’d try…alternative approaches.

·         First, gifts. Women like those, right? He’d try buying the prettiest, most expensive thing he can find, and leaving it for you to find. Or, if he is in a particularly good day -if he managed to get one up on Sigurd, maybe, that’d be a good day- he’d give it to you in person.

·         Throwing expensive things at you wouldn’t exactly work, making you feel inadequate and cheap. He notices, so he’d try something else.

·         He wants you closer, so he makes it so that you always sit with him and his brothers at the table where the leaders of the army dine.

·         Before long many men -including Harald, to whom Ivar notices you giving easier smiles than the rest, much to his horror- manage to sleaze their way to the chair at your other side, chatting with you during the nights, making you smile and laugh.

·         When word of how one of them tried talking your brother into a marriage arrangement reaches Ivar, he pulls back on his idea of having you sit with him.

·         To you, it just looks like a rejection, and Ivar notices you grow colder, more distant.

·         With the threat of how desired you have proven yourself to be, a beautiful woman and a fierce shieldmaiden, hanging over his head, Ivar grows more and more restless, and resolute he has to prove to you he can offer you much more than any of these men can.

·         He tries everything he can think of. Make it so that you are there when he beats his brothers in target practice, boast about how his strategy was what won them many a battle against the Saxons, repeat the tales about how he and his brothers are descended from the Gods themselves.

·         When Ivar makes the contraptions for his legs, he goes to find you with -barely contained, he shouldn’t even bother trying to hide it really- enthusiasm, trying to show off in front of you.

·         He ties a lot of his self-worth into how people perceive him, into how much of a ‘normal man’ he can pass off as, and as we know he stands a lot prouder and a lot more confident once he gains more control of the Great Army and manages to make those things.

·         When you see him, though, even though he is preening and standing tall, chin high and shoulders squared; all you do is look at the contraptions around his legs and back into his eyes.

·         “You’re a better fighter without those.” You’d say, and nothing else.

·         Ivar would sulk. There’s no way to impress you, nothing he can do to make you look at him with that mischievous streak you share with Hvitserk, or that companiable closeness you have with Björn.

·         Anger would quickly enough win over any impulse to sulk and feel sorry for himself, though.

·         He’d eventually grow colder, crueler, towards you. He’d feel like you rejected him, and being angry towards you -and in return making you be angry towards him- gives him someone to blame, gives him some way of letting the pain have form, have a target for all the mess of emotions it leaves inside him.

·         When Björn starts making plans to return to the Mediterranean, he fully expects to see you depart following his brother and never seeing you again.

·         He hates himself for grieving the loss of you, someone he never had, someone that -as far as he knows- never cared about him anyways.

·         But he does. The day when Björn and those who choose to come with him will depart East approaches, and Ivar is more on edge than ever.

·         Restless, angry, and with no one to blame but himself. But, of course, he won’t do that, no.

·         He taunts you, makes jabs at you and how you run after Björn like an enamored thrall, points out you choose to sail a ship like a coward instead of staying here -staying with him- and fighting the Saxons.

·         When you snap back, voice loud and eyes furious, that you were never planning on sailing back with Björn, you manage for once to stun Ivar into silence.

·         You don’t even give him time to hold on to cruelty, to the pain and anger he uses as both a weapon and a shield. You stand up from the table and leave the hall.

·         Hvitserk doesn’t lift his head from his food, but still grumbles that he should go after her. At Ivar’s affronted frown, Ubbe insists that he should, offering his little brother a sly smile and something about going to find his woman.

·         Ivar would deny to his very grave and beyond it that his ears turned red at the implication behind Ubbe’s words.

·         But he did, trying to dispel thoughts that told him how he was running after you like a lovesick puppy.

·         When he finds you, you are still angry, because of course you are. And your anger is to Ivar like an electric shock over an exposed nerve, drawing out all the vitriol and fury and explosiveness.

·         Before long he has managed to make you angrier than he has ever seen you, and your voices rise with your tempers.

·         A second time you manage to stun Ivar into silence comes shortly after the argument between the two erupts.

·         He doesn’t even remember what he was about to say, only that with a few words about how you chose to stay with the Great Army for him makes all the thoughts on his head disappear.

·         Before he can twist himself into knots about it, thinking how it must surely be a lie, how you are playing some cruel trick on him; you lean in and kiss him.

·         Ivar doesn’t know how to react, not at first. The only woman he has kissed before was a slave his brother instructed to sleep with him, and he refuses to think of that night, of that woman.

·         He stays frozen under your touch, until you pull back, and smile.

·         He realizes when lack of air makes your kiss end that in your eyes you don’t have that glint of playfulness you share with Hvitserk, or that comfortable understanding you have with Björn; but something more tender, more real, and definitely hungrier.

____

So yeah, that’s that. I have never written headcanons before, and I struggle a lot with season 4 Ivar (who am I kidding, I struggle with writing Ivar in general) even tho he is my favorite Ivar. Idk, I gave it my best, hopefully I can learn from this and get better at it lol

Thank you so much for reading, lovelies!! <3

[supercorp-hosie]

My thoughts for legacies 3x13: I’ll try to put the point chronologically

1. When Kaleb blew the candle, I’m so confused because the first thing that comes to my head is: he’s blowing that because is daytime, but why put it so far from Cleo? Why use a candle when you have electricity? And apparently I’m a fool, because that’s how the confinement spell works duh! I only recalled that when Alaric blew it in the end. I’m so dumb lol.

2. I love that Kaleb is the first to seek Cleo out, wanted answers and ready to accept them. When he tries to comfort Cleo in her memories, that’s me too! But apparently being the badass she is, she immediately come up with the idea of replacing her grandma to go with Malivore.

3. Poor Cleo! My heart sores when it started with a little girl, just like with Finch. She’s a hero! She’s so brave! She’s a queen! And weirdly she likes frogs(or toads?) very much. I wonder why. And although she tried to kill Hope last episode, I never see her as a villain. Never for a second. Instead I’m impressed. Tbh I didn’t understand why she is always playing with clay/mud since the beginning of this episode. But after her backstory, I just feel sad and proud at the same time. Sad because it’s shaped from her painful time of enslavement. Proud because she’s using the thing she learned from it against Malivore as her weapon despite the painfulness. I remember she talked about her sister dying, but nothing about that occurs in the memories. Did she lie before or it’s just another thing that the writers forgot?

4. ‘Jonch’ is horrible! I prefer Finsie as the ship name. Why is their moment always so cringy? I get this second embarrassment from them a lot, mostly from Josie tho. I always felt there’s something lacking in Finsie, just like what I felt when Handon started it’s kind of sudden. Maybe because of my perception, I really didn’t know why Josie think Finch is hot. I have to learn how to appreciate her beauty. But goof news, I actually appreciated Finsie first kiss, because I see why they haven’t kiss before, and why they finally kiss. It’s cute and the sparkling, haha. Tbh I start to appreciate Finch’s beauty from the kissing scene angle. But this episode, again, I still feel cringy in most of the Finsie scenes. I have to put my palm on my head. Anyway, I enjoy the “girlfriend” scene tho, like Finsie starting to grow on me(again, the first time is their first kiss, hopefully no more cringy afterwards). It’s really good to see Josie happy. Btw, since Finch decided to enrol, will she be the new alpha now that she defeated Jed? That’s good for her, she finally has a pack and no longer lonely.

5. Along with Finsie scenes, does anyone realise there’s actually other students there? And there are actually other witches at the school?? I remembered that there’s like only four witches? Because Josie was the only witch at the school when Berbelang!Hope happened? Annnndddd! To that! Does anyone remember there’s this girl Gaby/Gabby? She’s also a witch, and she loves dnd like Wade? They can’t tease us with Penelope using her then just let her disappear?

6. Oh great there’s actually other wolves at the school. I’m starting to think Jed is the only wolf left (of course there’s Hope, but she’s tribrid). As much as I enjoy Finch being badass that she can stand beside Josie, I felt so sorry for Jed and his actor. He’s been there for 3 seasons and yet Finch get a backstory before him. He has none! The actor is great, look at the siren episode! He hardly gets any decent lines and scenes now. Instead, they make him looked useless, hard to be respectable. Like anyone can just harm his alpha reputation. Justice for Jed please. Oh and the fact that Finch got a backstory before Kaleb too? It’s unacceptable. They deserve more. Jed doesn’t even have a last name, my god! Anyway that doesn’t change the fact that I want to hug baby Finch so much bc she’s adorable!

7. With MG gone, Kaleb looks like the only vampire left in the school. I miss MG. What about Ethan?

8. Josie and Cleo finally met! I’m glad that she’s learned something from her too. I think it’s true that other kids never felt as easy as Josie at the school. They finally addressed it.

9. I’m frustrated that Hope never wanted answers from Cleo. The only friend that helped her grieve. But hey maybe she’s too hurt to be able to bear Cleo in her sight. But then again there’s the Landon problem, so she’s off with Landon again. Only taking to Landon the whole episode, being the only one that only talk to one person in the whole episode. Feel bad for her about this. Poor Hope.

10. I really feel bad for Landon, because there’s a lot of hardships to make him like that. Someone please give him hugs and a therapist. The show is doing a full cycle by stating what he’d done is just like what Hope did when she returned from Malivore. I understand why he kept himself away, but weirdly, the way the let those words out, it feels like he wants to get back at Hope when I think he wanted Hope’s understanding. Maybe he wanted both?

12. Someone told me that every 13th episode is the episode where Landon’s power are explored. I kind of agree with it now. Because he’s finally having the fighting skills that he’s longing now. Finally he can achieve his desires to physically fight alongside Hope. For what though, I don’t know, because in the case of supercorp, Lena never needed it physically to be Supergirl’s partner in saving the world, or of course to protect Kara. Glad for him, anyway, bc that’s what’s he wants. And the blow to the head? It’s awesome.

11. I can’t believe Landon is blaming Hope for not coming to save him sooner?! What the hell? What happened to “I’m going to be the one that always fight to find Hope”, idk whether I quoted it precisely, but the meaning is there. I am furious. Is this some sick drama that the show wants Landon to think that Hope was not coming to him because she had a perfect version of him?? That aside, when I see that Handon is going to fight together physically, I actually think the scene is good and they will overcome the blaming thing, and going to be a power couple. Just when I have that thought, Landon have to fucking throw the artifact towards Malivore(whether it is Malivore I’ll discuss afterwards, it’s contradictory)!! That’s such a stupid move! Where’s your brain? And it’s broken, oh god. And the show have to show Hope being so weak during the fight. I mean why? She’s a badass, why do they have to make her weak to glorify Landon?? They made her look useless. These things just really kill the budding Handon spirit in me. The show really knows how to make people resent Handon and Landon. Just please change the show name.

12. Anyway to be fair, Landon do care for Hope and do love her. Before, though I don’t think they are endgame quality, I think that if they do improve, Handon endgame is tolerable, acceptable. But now, I’m not so sure of that anymore. Other than the above mentioned points, Landon did leave Hope for a solid third time. Why the show have to establish that for Handon when their fans desperately defended Landon that he wasn’t always leaving. I mean I’ve seen Handon shippers fought really hard against the “Landon is always leaving Hope” argument. What a way to make a couple being endgame. In Chinese proverbs, there’s a thing for a third time. Like the three strikes law, I think? It says not to do anything or tolerate anything undesirable that has happened more than three times. So please do not make Handon together ever again. It’s an insult to Hope too.

13. To see it differently, poor Hope will finally have time out of Landon to think of herself and her future. We need to see her having her own storyline. So maybe we can see Hosie eventually? Sorry Finsie for anticipating your break up in the future. But please enjoy yourselves when Hope grows on her own, because Josie deserves a decent relationship on screen too. Hosie didn’t interact this episode, I’m sad.

14. I just can’t help but wonder why Alaric oversee the artifact being destroyed so easily. And when Josie introduces Finch, she deserves a decent conversation with the headmaster, really. Oh he’s an adult, be a responsible and respectable one, especially you’re Josie dad. Help her with her impression with her crush. Alaric really need help, we need another adult figure. It’s okay that’s not Caroline.

15. I kind of thinking that Landon and Cleo are shippable too when I know that they are leaving at the same time. Cleo being the sole reason to Landon existence is one of the reasons to ship them. She’s the one that tell Malivore he can make vessels and create legacy, that leads to Landon existing. Not to mention she did literally made Golem Landon by hand (we all know the thing that Hope made doesn’t have a body, so Cleo must have made his torso and limps right). Or maybe we prefer wandon endgame? Wade is precious too, he’s the one that point out Landon is not himself.

16. I’m so confused by this episode Malivore. I thought Cleo trapped him inside that monster Handon defeated this episode. But if it was trapped this long? How did the pit, Clarke and Landon even exist? Did Malivore escape from it?? It must have escaped.

17. In the promo for the next episode, we’re seeing Lizzie and Hosie interaction! I’m excited! I think maybe Josie will be the one that bring Hope out of the cult’s enchantment. What will happen? Maybe they will realise something or develop something towards each other? Anything hosie that MAKE SENSE please. Oh and Hizzie friendship/banters, and Lizzie suddenly being and “angel” will be so fun to watch. Finally, the trio!

18. I know it’s irrelevant but since I mentioned Clarke, I miss Holarke. I have some shippable thoughts about Finch and Penelope too. P is the she-devil in good girl attire; F looks like a bad girl but she’s good hearted. They are both fiery, imagine what they’ll be like when they’re together, erupting volcanoes?

19. Applause to Aria’s acting skill, this is like the eleventh role he’s played in legacies? Original Landon, Hope’s (subconscious) Landon, Landon’s (subconscious) Landon, Josie’s SimuLandon, Hope’s therapy Landon, Malivore Landon, golem Landon, ptsd Landon, oni-possessed Landon, golem Landon micmicking Necromancer, Clarke-Landon. Keep up the good work!

[lotusjwy]

"Just leave me ALONE" for Xicheng? Preferably if LXC says it JC? Preferably in public or in front of wangxian and the juniors ? E.g. JC is the only one, who notices LXC is having a bad day and he more or less subtlely tries to get him to talk ? But LXC tries to be fine cause he is out of seclusion so he can't still have bad days'?

But if you have another idea do that! no pressure ! Thanks in advance !

hello there, the way this is so specific has been killing me for DAYS 😂  I had to send screenshots to my friend bc of how specific it is dude, like I love that you know exactly what you want bc it makes my brain not have to work as hard, but BRO dskjfhkasd why do u like to see my boy suffer So much 😭😭😭 

i hope this lives up to ur expectations!!! 🥰

It had been a long day. A long and tiring day, so if he lost his temper, he couldn’t be blamed, right? He just wanted to go back home and play the flute, perhaps sleep a little, but he was absolutely done with spending time with everyone else. So, why did he find himself still in the company of so many people? Why was he still sitting here with Wangji, Wei Wuxian, Jiang Wanyin and a handful of juniors? Why?

This was all Wei Wuxian’s fault, he was the one that insisted everyone spend more time together. Xichen already saw plenty of Wei Wuxian, Wangji, Sizhui and Jingyi, as well as often seeing Jiang Wanyin and Jin Rulan, due to sect business. If anything, the only person here that Lan Xichen rarely saw was Ouyang Zizhen, and it wasn’t as if he’d spent much of the day speaking to him.

Jiang Wanyin had taken it upon himself to seat himself down next to Lan Xichen, talking to him, hoping that he could get to the root of why the other had been acting differently. “You’ve been quiet all day, which is completely fine, I get that. Sometimes everyone is a bit too much to handle, but Wei Wuxian insists on family bonding, whatever the fuck that me-”

And he just would not stop talking, he’d been talking for so long, all day, when would he stop. “Just leave me alone. You keep speaking to me as if I’ve shown any indication that I wish to continue this conversation. You’re quick to call Wei Wuxian a chatterbox and an annoyance, yet have you ever looked inward?!” When he was met with a stunned silence, he realised something was incredibly wrong.

Oh. Oh no. He had said that out loud, hadn’t he? Well, he couldn’t take it back now, and he had wanted to be left alone. It wasn’t his fault Jiang Wanyin wasn’t taking the hint. Xichen did feel a little bad, when he saw the hurt expression on lJiang Cheng’s face, that abruptly was wiped from his face, only to be replaced by a blank face.

“Apologies, Zewu-jun. I appear to have overstepped.” He stood and gave the other a stiff bow, before leaving the room, not looking or speaking to anyone, feeling thoroughly embarrassed.  

Wei Wuxian stood awkwardly after his brother had left the room, wanting to follow him out, but knowing that the other probably wanted to be alone right now. He also knew that he shouldn’t be the one going to ensure he was okay, “Xichen-ge…”

“I am aware, no need to scold me.” Lan Xichen’s voice was terse, knowing that everyone in the room was staring at him in shock, possibly all wanting to scold him for his behaviour.

“Jiujiu was only trying to make sure that you were okay. Talking helps sometimes, you know. He rarely reaches out to people like that, but he did to you.” Everyone here knew his uncle’s temper, just as well as they knew how much he cared, if anyone here didn’t know that, then they shouldn’t be here. They didn’t belong here.

Lan Sizhui put a comforting hand on his friend’s shoulder, “Jin Ling, should you be saying this here?” He knew that Jin Ling was cross with Zewu-jun, but he didn’t want the other saying anything that he may regret later on.

“It’s nothing everyone here doesn’t already know about him.” He scoffed out, his voice dripping with disdain towards Sect Leader Lan. How dare he take his uncle’s kindness for granted.

Xichen tuned out the remainder of the conversation, thinking about the mess he had put himself in. It wasn’t that he disliked Jiang Wanyin, quite the opposite actually, and yet here he was near yelling at him in front all of their friends and family. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been stuck in his thoughts before he realised that he was being spoken to by Jin Rulan again.

“Well? Are you just going to sit here and wallow in your stupid misery, or are you going to go apologise?” There was a fiercely protective look in the younger’s eyes, showing that he’d physically fight the other, even if it meant losing, for his uncle’s honour.

“Jin Ling!” Wei Wuxian sent a sharp look to the younger, inwardly cursing that Jin Ling seemed to have inherited his mother’s fierce protective nature. He felt the same, but he also had the sense of knowing that saying everything you felt could backfire on you within seconds.

“Don’t get mad at me for being mad at him! He was being an assh-” the rest of whatever he was going to say being smothered by Lan Jingyi’s hand, which was conveniently blocking any other derogatory words that Jin Ling may want to speak.

“Alright, alright, young mistress, it’s okay. Let’s calm down now. He’ll go apologise now.” Lan Jingyi gave his sect leader a pointed look, as if telling him that if he didn’t leave to go find Sect Leader Jiang right now, then he would release his friend and let him unleash his full anger at him.

With a stiff nod, Lan Xichen left towards the direction Jiang Wanyin had stalked off to. He found the other leaning on a tree, staring up at the sky, seemingly lost in thought. He slowly approached the other, contemplating how to best bring attention to himself.

“I-” He jumped slightly, when he was cut off, not realising that Jiang Cheng had even noticed him approaching.

“Save it. No need to apologise, I know you were bullied out here.” His voice blunt and to the point, void of any emotion, as if he were trying to protect himself. 

Xichen was stunned silent, not knowing how to respond to that. He had been told to come apologise, so it wasn’t as if he could refute that. “Oh.”

Jiang Cheng sighed and shook his head. He had guessed that his nephew and brother had made the other come out here and apologise, but he was hoping that Lan Xichen had wanted to come out on his own accord. Evidently not. And why should he? It’s not as if Jiang Cheng was someone that was important to Lan Xichen. All he’d done was annoy him today.

Lan Xichen walked closer to the other, offering him an apologetic look, “whatever you’re thinking, you’re wrong.”

“I find that hard to believe.” How could he be wrong, when all signs pointed to his conclusions? He’d been annoying, when he hadn’t intended to be. He’d been compared to Wei Wuxian of all people.

“I’m sorry.”

And for what it was worth, he did sound very apologetic, but Jiang Cheng didn’t seem to believe it. “I said save it.”

“You did. However, I do genuinely mean it.” Xichen looked at the other, focusing on how the other was mindlessly fidgeting with Zidian. I’m making him uncomfortable. “I was told to come out and find you, yes, but I would have apologised on my own. I wouldn’t have left it li-”

“Don’t worry, Sect Leader Lan, I won’t let this hinder our sect relations. I’m not so petty so as to do anything that was affect either of our sects, for a personal matter.” Jiang Cheng cut off Lan Xichen, yet again, seemingly realising why the other had gone out of his way to come out to apologise.

“That’s not-” Lan Xichen was beginning to grow very sick of being cut off midsentence.

“I won’t interfere with any of the trade agreements we have existing already, nor any that we may broker in the future.” Jiang Cheng was rambling now, thinking of anything he could, to ensure Lan Xichen that he didn’t want their sects to fall out with each other. “Oh, we were discussing having our junior disciples have an excha-”

“Would you shut up?” If the other would just stop sprouting out useless information, this conversation could end less painfully than it needs to be, instead Jiang Wanyin seemed to want to draw it out.  

Jiang Cheng blinked in shock, his mouth falling open. That was the second time he’d made Lan Xichen burst out in anger like that. Wow, he must really hate me.

“If you would just let me speak! I do not dislike you, nor do I think that this should affect our sects standings with each other.” Xichen’s voice was strained, as he struggled to keep his frustrations with Jiang Wanyin at bay.

Jiang Cheng simply nodded in response, “of course not.”

“You don’t believe me.” Disbelief coating his voice, he stared at the other with narrowed eyes.

“I…” he struggled to find a way to word this, without being insulting or rude, “I believe that you do not wish this to affect our sect standings. Nor do I.”

“But you believe that I dislike you.” He put it bluntly, not enjoying the circles they were seeming to go in this conversation.

With a shrug, he nodded. There wasn’t much else he could say on it, it’s not as if he could make his own beliefs go away with the snap of a finger.

“And nothing I say could convince you otherwise?” Xichen was close to losing it at the other again, not knowing how to change the direction of this conversation. “Not even our past relationship with each other, prior to this evening?”

“Sect Leader Lan is a kind man. He gives chances to those who do not deserve them. I simply overstepped my boundaries tonight.” Jiang Cheng was looking up at the moon, his voice void of any emotion as he spoke.  

With a sigh, Lan Xichen moved to stand in front of the other, needing to capture his attention somehow. “And sometimes he simply has bad days, that have nothing to do with those around him.” He said it lightly, but his face showed that he was being serious. It really had been a bad day that had come an unfortunate end.

“But I didn’t help.”

“No, you didn’t. But I should have verbalised that, instead of ignored you.” Thinking about it for a moment, he added on something else, “which is why you kept speaking to me. Other times your company and conversation has kept me from my bad days, it was only safe for you to believe that it would be okay today. It wasn’t your fault.”

“Hmm.” He only hummed in response, as if he didn’t want to accept that he played no fault in the situation.  

“I don’t know what else I can do to convince you otherwise. I promise you that we are okay. As long as you can forgive me for speaking to you like that.” Right. Apologising was what he’d come out here to do in the first place.

Jiang Cheng narrowed his eyes and looked at the other incredulously, “of course I forgive you, I was being fucking annoying and sticking my nose where it didn’t belong.”

Lan Xichen shook his head almost immediately, “I’d argue out of everyone we’ve been with today, it is  a place where you are welcome to stick your nose into. I should have communicated that I wanted silence, it wasn’t your fault.”

When Jiang Cheng didn’t respond, Xichen sighed and nodded, “fine, I can see that this will take some time to move past. But can we do that? Forget about tonight, learn to better communicate with each other? A relationship wouldn’t be possible otherwise.” He quickly turned away from the other, choosing to stare up at the sky, instead of seeing the disbelief on Jiang Cheng’s face at what he had just said. He had more or less confessed his feelings.

Jiang Cheng’s eyes widened in shock as he processed what he had just heard, his cheeks beginning to burn at the implications. He coughed into his fist, “uh, yes. We can do that.”

[puckyeahobx]

just a little bit is all im asking for

a/n: sorry y’all but this account is a rafe cameron woobification zone. go cry about it. (NOT MY GIF)

word count: 4.6k

summary: miss y/n and rafe are fwb and of course it’s complicated bc why wouldn’t it be?

warnings: none!! pure fluff

You weren’t really sure how you had ended up in Rafe Cameron’s bed almost nightly for the past month, but you weren’t complaining. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that your older brother was hired to take care of the Cameron property and you had nothing better to do than help him out. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that you were a Pogue through and through and he needed to rebel against his Kook life in one way or another. Or maybe, just maybe, it was some weird twist of fate. 

Whatever was going on between you and Rafe hadn’t started romantic, or even sexual. It was an honest to God work relationship. But then, without warning, he started getting close to your brother which meant that he was then closer to you too, even if that just meant in proximity. From this new up close and personal perspective you got to know him in a way you never thought possible given the ways of the island. 

For one thing, it became increasingly harder to ignore how blue his eyes were. Or how the muscles of his broad shoulders would move beneath his tan skin. His laugh was the hardest to ignore because of how surprising it was. When he was with Ward or Sarah it was like he was a ghost: the laughter always died in his chest before bubbling out of him the way you now knew it could. As he got closer to you you began to see everything that he was in a whole new light. His bones, his skin, his muscles, they all looked brand new and rearranged when he was the Rafe you knew on the boat. 

You also got closer to the parts of him that weren’t physical. It wasn’t as if the three of you were having intense heart to hearts or anything, but he was definitely an open, alive version of Rafe Cameron. Through the jokes he cracked with your brother, the way he talked about his family and his so called friends (or, in Ward’s case, didn’t talk about his family and friends), or just the way he carried himself on the open ocean and away from Kook life, his priorities and true colors really started to show. He was just a guy who hated everything he had been taught to stand for and hated himself for standing for it for so long. He was no anti-establishment anarchist by any means, but he knew that there was something very wrong with the way that he had been raised and resented what it had done to him. It was no secret that he had struggled with substance abuse in the past, he talked about it a lot more than you expected, but now that that was in his past he was able to clearly see what had caused him to go down that road, he stayed away from it as much as possible. 

So maybe it wasn’t because of fate or rebellion or your constant presence on his property. Maybe it was just because you were the only thing available at the time that didn’t remind him of the pieces of himself that made him hate the person he saw in the mirror.

++++++++++++++

It was another long day on the boat. You guys didn’t really do anything to be honest, but Ward didn’t seem to care. He barely noticed that your brother was on the payroll or that the boat was gone almost every day, but as long as he didn’t realize and suddenly have a problem with either of those facts, it was going to be smooth sailing. Your brother was doing something in the hull of the boat with some generator (you never listened when he told you these things) and you were on the main deck tanning and reading. Well, trying to read. Rafe was with your brother and you were pretending like it didn’t annoy you that he wasn’t paying attention to you. Whatever you guys were was not technically public knowledge, but was it too much to ask that he paid more attention to you than some generator at the bottom of a boat? 

You were in the middle of plotting his untimely demise when you heard footsteps coming up to the deck which meant you quickly had to become very interested in your book. He didn’t say anything as he approached you, moving to sit too far away on your right. Since you were still pretending that you weren’t annoyed, you continued reading as if nothing was wrong. Because nothing was wrong, right? How were you going to be mad at the boy whose bed you happened to end up in every night for not hanging out with you while the sun was still up? Besides, he was your brother’s friend, not yours. 

“Good book?” He asked after several moments of awkward silence where his eyes stuck to your exposed skin and you reread the same sentence over and over again.

You gave him a slight nod, “The best.”

You saw him nod to himself and look away from you out of the corner of your eye. He looked like he was thinking about something. Hesitating in a very familiar way. “You weren’t there when I woke up this morning.”

The breath rising in your lungs died immediately as you heard the words fall off his tongue. It was clear that he was trying not to sound hurt, but the breathy nature of the barely-there whisper was a dead giveaway. 

You didn’t know what to say, because it was true. You weren’t there when he woke up that morning. But this wasn’t out of the ordinary for you guys, really. Sometimes you fell asleep after you hooked up, only for both of you to wake up a few hours later and sneak you out through the window. Other times you both stumbled through an awkward exchange, only for you to be gone almost as soon as it had started. But you never left without saying goodbye. But given the nature of your arrangement, you thought that was purely coincidental. It didn’t seem like something that would bother a friends with benefits, so when it was 6:00 am and his arm was still draped across your stomach (holding on for dear life) you thought it would just be best for the both of you if you didn’t see his eyes flutter open in the first seconds of awake-ness, or the way his muscles looked under his skin when he undoubtedly stretched his huge body out across his sheets. That seemed like a line that you both had already silently agreed didn’t need to be crossed, so to hear his voice waver, even slightly, as he questioned your whereabouts startled you to say the least.

“Yeah, uh...I wasn’t feeling good this morning,” Without looking at him you paused, trying to think on your feet, “The sunrise woke me up and I realized my stomach felt weird,” Another pause, “I’m sorry.”

He looked at you now, his arms resting on his folded up knees, “You could have woken me up...I could have gotten you some medicine or something....”

You knew he was trying to be sweet but you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Why are you laughing? I’m serious!”

Halting your giggles, you reached out to set a hand on his arm reassuringly, “I know you are, there’s just something about the Rafe Cameron treating the girl he’s fucking’s minor stomach ailment. Seems a little off brand.”

He scoffed and looked down again, not laughing nearly as much as you had hoped he would. “Who exactly is this ‘Rafe Cameron’ you know so well then? You think I’m just some asshole?”

His voice was ice cold which was never a good sign. This wasn’t a side of him that you ever were on the receiving end of, but based on your experiences as an observer, things were about to spiral out of control real quick. 

“Rafe, you know I was just kidding-”

“Well I just don’t think it’s funny to think that one of my best friends thinks I’m such a useless asshole, that’s all.”

And then, before you could respond, he was up and back on the lower deck with a huff. He was stomping, of course. He’s a stomper.

You watched until you couldn’t see any of that hair you loved anymore and then immediately threw your head and groaned. Feeling immeasurably stupid, you rubbed your hands on your face in frustration. You were already lying, why did you have to say all that? Of course he would have helped you. You knew what it meant to him that he was becoming a better person than he used to be. He wore his reputation like a scarlet letter and here you were, throwing it in his face for the sake of selling a lie. And for what? To avoid admitting that you had to sneak out before you did something you regretted? Like telling him how much the way he wrapped his arms around you instinctively in his sleep made you want to break down into sobs? Or maybe that despite the unorthodox situation you had gotten yourselves in, you had never felt safer or more taken care of in your life. How embarrassing to have to hurt him with a lie over something so trivial as the way you couldn’t help but adore him all day, every day, with every breath you took.

Not to mention that you really were best friends, just like he said. You were best friends long before whatever was going on started, well, going on, and hopefully you would be best friends after. 

After. 

It was in this moment that you realized you weren’t realized that you weren’t ready for an after. This, this thing you had was something that you weren’t ready to have to get over. The rules were fuzzy and there weren’t any titles, but those moments with him where it was just him were the only things that had any residency in your heart and in your mind for the last month. Whatever this was to him, you were going to be it and you were going to be the best at it. As long as it kept him within arms reach. 

But first, you had to make it up to him.

++++++++++++++

The two of you had set up a sort of system over the last couple of weeks. After a long day on the boat or in town or whatever it was for the day, you would head your separate ways and wait until your brother had disappeared to his room to give the all clear. At that point, you would wait for Rafe to give the all clear on his end (the Ward and Sarah of it all sometimes getting in the way until the wee hours of the night), when you would finally sneak out your window and head over on your bike to avoid the noise of a car engine. You secretly didn’t think that your brother would even care that much, but sneaking around was just too much fun to pass up.

However, tonight you didn’t waste time on all of that. You waited for your brother to go to bed or do whatever it is he does after hours but mostly because you didn’t want to answer any questions because, to be honest, you didn’t have any answers. But once you knew that he wouldn’t be a problem, you hopped on your bike and made a beeline for the Cameron estate. 

His bedroom was on the second floor, but at this point you were very well acquainted with the makeshift ladder he had built years ago when he realized that his locked bedroom door was never going to be enough distance between himself and Ward. You got halfway up the side of the house when you heard the yelling and the crashing. If his icy tone on the boat wasn’t a good sign, this sign was practically screaming “Enter at Your Own Risk”.

Finally reaching the top, you banged on his window just as you caught sight of him about to throw a very expensive looking lamp. His room was a complete mess of shattered glass. Your heart broke at the realization that he had to have been at this for hours.

When he heard your knocking he stopped dead in his tracks and turned. At first glance, his whole body softened at the sight of you, but then it was as if he had remembered what had happened all of a sudden and he rebuilt the stone wall behind his eyes immediately. Nonetheless, he stalked over towards you and opened the window.

“What do you want?” He huffed at you through the window.

“Can I come in?”

He turned around and stepped back, making room for you to get your body in. He usually helped with this part. “I’m not in the mood to have sex with you.”

His remark hurt more than it should have and it probably had to do with the distance between the two of you and the lamp still threatening to be thrown from the hands that you knew wanted desperately to be gentle. “Can’t a friend come over to check on a friend with no sexual ulterior motive?”

Gently, he set the lamp down at its right place on the side of his bed before turning back around to you and crossing his arms over his chest, “I don’t know, Y/N? Can she?”

You started to walk towards him, wanting to be closer to him for this conversation, but the sound of glass and ceramic crunching under your tennis shoes startled you. “Rafe….What did you do?”

“You act surprised. I thought this was exactly what you would come to expect from the Rafe Cameron?” The words seemed like it was a joke but his tone and the grimace on his face were anything but. His face was screwed up in such a way that it was impossible to tell which emotion was winning at the moment: hurt or anger. 

“Rafe…” You speak so soft and slow so you don’t spook him, carefully walking across this mess you both made, “I shouldn’t have said that. I know how good of a man you are. That guy that I heard about...he doesn’t live here anymore.”

He was clearly trying to struggle to not look at you, especially as you got closer. “Clearly,” He points to the shards all over the floor, “He does.”

Finally reaching him, you grab his arm and hold it tightly before gently resting a hand on his cheek, willing him to look at you. “You got rid of him once, we can get rid of him again. I-I should have never implied that you wouldn’t take care of me. I know you would-”

“I always have. Always. I always will,” His hand had come up to hold the one on your face as he whispered to you. The wall behind his eyes being torn down brick by brick. 

“I know, I know,” You weren’t sure when your resolve decided to break and when your brain gave your voice permission to break, but here you were: standing under his gaze about to fall to a million pieces. 

He noticed almost immediately and scooped you up in his arms, like he wasn’t the broken one standing in the evidence of his frustration. “Hey, hey, don’t cry. It’s ok. I just, I lost it for a second. I’m ok now...”

The way that he was so ready to console you in this moment is what broke you, to be honest. Trying to scrounge up whatever dignity you had left, you begged your voice to stop quivering as you sat down on the bed behind you, your head in your hands. “No, no it’s uh, it’s not this.”

He sat down beside you, looking at you nervously. Like you could fall apart before him at any moment, “What is it then?”

“Why did it matter to you that I left without saying goodbye?” You didn’t know what you were saying until you heard the words spilling out of your mouth almost on top of each other. And if the look on his face was any indication, he was just as surprised as you were. 

Running a hand through his hair he sighed and looked back down to the floor again, “Um, I’m not really sure, just curious I guess.”

Your heart sank. Of course. He was probably just trying to make conversation on the boat, you were the one that made more of it than it was. Like always. “Yeah, uh, for sure. That makes sense.”

The silence that followed was much too long and much too awkward to be between you and Rafe, your best friend. 

Then he finally spoke. “Is that ok? That I was wondering?”

You turn to him and you find a face so completely lost and worried it took you by surprise and made your heart twist in on itself, “What?” It was more a breath than a word.

“I um, I just didn’t know if it was ok for me to be asking about your whereabouts, I guess. I’m not really sure how these kinds of things work…”

You tried to swallow as your mouth went completely dry under the weight of his nervous gaze, “‘These kinds of things’?”

He cleared his throat before continuing. The energy in the room had gone from hostile, to remorseful, to anxious in a matter of minutes. “Yeah, uh, you know. Hooking up with your best friend. There’s no rule book….I don’t want to scare you off.”

Your cheeks warmed up despite yourself. It was nice to still hear him call you that after everything. “Well, even if there was, neither of us are very good at following those anyway,” you joked, trying to test the waters. He luckily returned an inward chuckle as he looked back down at his hands. Getting your sea legs, your voice dropped down to a confident whisper, “And yes, you can wonder about my whereabouts. You can wonder about anything you want. There’s no part of me that isn’t already open for you to take.”

His breath caught in his throat as he looked back at you one last time, “Then why did you leave?”

This wasn’t the response you were expecting, but it was the one that you needed. It was your chance to finally be honest. You could stick with your story and keep dancing in this limbo with him, one that will surely end up killing you both, or take the fucking leap and tell him the space where his shoulders turns into his neck is the single most beautiful stretch of land you had ever laid your eyes on. You were never one to be particularly brave but here, on his bed - the one place safe from the broken glass and hearts - you felt bold enough to hand him what you had hoped he would have taken on his own months ago.

“I just, I didn’t realize I had fallen asleep for so long, and the idea of waking up next to you in the daytime felt really… intimate. I was just afraid of you seeing me in that light, I think.” You tried to keep the confident whisper act up the whole time and were proud when you only faltered once or twice.

Rafe scoffed jokingly as he grabbed one of your hands again, “I’ve already seen you naked and screaming, you think a little daylight is gonna freak me out?”

The warmth in your cheeks started to spread all over as you broke eye contact out of embarrassment, a nervous laugh rising in your throat, “Well, that’s not exactly what I meant. But I guess you were right…it was stupid.”

“No I don’t think it was stupid...I think I get it.” His voice was a lot more serious in comparison to the playful taunting from seconds before. 

“Yeah?” This surprised you, because you weren’t even sure you got it. Not completely, anyway. 

Scooting closer to you, your hands still intertwined and resting on your thigh, he sighed as he looked down at them, “Yeah, I think so. I’m pretty scared anytime you look at me. I can only imagine how it’d feel first thing in the morning when I’m just getting used to being a person again...It’s very primal and vulnerable, I guess. When the sun is rising.”

Rafe really didn’t get enough credit for how smart he was. Because yes, besides the parts about his eyelashes resting against the tops of his cheeks as the sun peaked around his curtains, that was exactly it. It is very hard to keep your guard up when you’re barely remembering the parts you’re supposed to be hiding. But you didn’t say that. Your confidence was running thin at the realization that he could read your mind, so you said, “Yeah, something like that” and you both fell into a silence again. 

It took a full five minutes before he spoke again. “Are you going to leave without saying goodbye tonight?” 

“What makes you think you’re spending the night?” You joked, bumping his shoulder with your own.

“I, um, I just assumed...Sorry.” 

Another joke of yours had managed not to land, so instead of talking, you moved. Sighing and leaning over to kiss him on the cheek, you took off your shoes and socks and shimmied out of your pants, leaving you just in your t-shirt and underwear. You climbed under the blankets on your side of the bed and held your arms out for him to come lay with you. “I was only teasing. Of course I’m spending the night.”

The first smile of the night broke the tiniest bit across his face as he stood up and walked over to the light switch, the reminder of what had happened crunching beneath his shoes before coming back over to you and stripping down to an identical outfit. Normally after sex you would lay your head against his chest and listen to his body try to get back to normal beneath your touch, but tonight he laid his head on yours and you ran your fingers through his hair slowly so as not to spook him.

“Y/N?” He whispered just when you were about to doze off.

“Rafe?”

He paused as if thinking about what he really needed to say, “Are you... are you happy? Like this, here, with me?”

The question knocked the wind out of you. Because, of course you were. But it almost sounded like he wanted you to say no. “Rafe, I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t happy. You’re one of my best friends-”

“But are you happy like this? Pretending.”

“Are you pretending?” It was your turn to hope he would say no.

He moved off your chest and looked at you with the little light peering in from the moon outside, “A little.”

“About what?” You tried to sound neutrally curious, like you weren’t about to cry. You couldn’t take a rejection from him right now. Not now, not ever. 

“Y/N…” His attempts at telepathy were not working and his whispered plea was just making you more nervous.

“About what, Rafe? Just tell me. I can take it.” 

Another too long pause and then finally: “Are you happy...are you happy pretending like we’re not both holding back? Because, to be honest, I’m not sure I am.”

An anvil might as well have fallen directly on top of your breathing canal. You had absolutely no idea how to respond to the fact that you weren’t making him happy. The one person whose happiness consumed you, and you failed. 

“Um...well...I can just, I can just go,” you tried to get up and find your shoes just to feel yourself be pulled back to the bed. 

“No...Y/n...That’s not what I meant! I um, I like spending time with you. I like hooking up with you. That stuff does make me happy. Like, really happy.”

You honestly thought he was stroking out or teasing you for fun at this point, he was making absolutely no sense. “Ok? Rafe you’re not making any sense.”

He sighed, “I like those things and so much more but...Y/N….I’m tired of pretending like I don’t...Like I don’t-”

“Rafe, please-”

“Like I don’t love you.” 

Your head was instantly dizzy with the sound of those words off his tongue. You tried to respond but were cut off by his nervous rambling. 

“Not like. Love. I love you, Y/N. And this, the sex and the secrets, it’s great. It’s hot! But um, I’m kind of losing it here. I just hope every time that it means more to you than it seems like so this morning when you were gone, after I finally thought I had made some progress, it really sucked. I just want this to be something tangible so bad to prove that the guy everyone besides you knew really doesn’t live here anymore so I just kind of lost it because you clearly don’t feel the same way and I was just not prepared to be the only one pretending.”

At a loss, you just stared at him with your jaw hung loose and your eyes misty with the threat of sobs clawing at the back of your throat. 

“Please tell me I’m not the only one pretending,” It appeared as though he had already beat you to the tears as he weakly whispered his plea to you across the darkness, across the fear, across the insecurity. “Please.”

There were no words that seemed fit to tell Rafe Cameron that you loved him so much it seemed like you had used up all of the love in the world, draining the Earth of its natural supply, so you just kissed him. This kiss didn’t have a destination like your previous ones did and it wasn’t full of secrets like the other ones were. It was just a kiss in its purest form: a declaration of love and the promise of more. It was sweet and tinged with the salt water from both sets of pathetic, lovesick eyes. It was perfect. 

He pulled away with his hands still on your waist, both of you laying on your sides trying to memorize the other’s face in the moonlight. “You never answered my question.” He knew you had, just then in that kiss, but he had always been greedy.

“You were never the only one pretending. I think I have been pretending much longer than you could even know.”

“Impossible, because I’ve been pretending since the moment I saw you.”

“You’re a liar, Rafe Cameron.”

“And you’re beautiful, Y/F/N Y/L/N. Now say it back.”

“Say what back?” You quipped, deciding he needed to be teased back.

“That you’re crazy about me and completely in love with me.”

You laughed at his ridiculousness, “Is that what you said? Wow I remembered the last 10 minutes very differently than you.”

“Yes, it is, now say it,” He softened after a pause, “Please?”

You pulled him closer by the back of his neck and smiled against his lips, “I love you. Not like. Love.”

He hummed contently before pulling you in for another kiss, “It sounds so much better when you say it.”

You giggle as his lips collide with yours, “But it tastes so sweet when you do.”

[writesowhatnext]

our paradise, poisoned // sirius black

Summary: reader & sirius are in a toxic relationship: they argue all the time and hurt each other compulsively. Is this their last argument?

Request: Reader x Sirius ANGSTY imagine based on the song 'Another Love' (Tom Odell I thought) , Post-Hogwarts a couple years. Y/n and Sirius are together and live together but things have become really toxic between them, they're always arguing over everything, he's flirting with other girls and cheating on her, he comes home smelling like other girls perfumes and it just gets worse and worse until they have a messy breakup! ANGST ending please :) Thank you!

A/N: got this was so hard to write bc I’m a slut for a happy ending but holy cow angst is cathartic

Reader: female

Warnings: toxic relationships, sad omg, slightly nsfw, sex talk, swearing, cat-calling, angst

Sirius had left over an hour ago with the door slamming behind him. You didn’t know where he was going but you could guess. You saw the way he stared at other girls; you knew the smell on his skin. You felt sick at the thought of it. As you sat on the floor in your hallway, knees brought to your chest and cheeks stiff with dried tears, you stared at the photo hung on the wall. It was only three years old, but the gilded frame was dusty and untouched. It was taken the day you moved into the house. You barely recognised the smiling faces in it anymore. He was holding you in his arms, his smile wide and bright whilst you laughed at something he’d said, head tipped backwards.

It used to be his favourite picture. You used to love each other.

In a twisted way, you still did. Every time you argued, every time the door slammed, every time you slept alone, your heart broke a little bit more. And then it numbed. Every time you thought you’d run out of tears, there were more to come. Every time you thought he’d hurt you the worst he ever would, he proved you wrong. That’s not to say you didn’t pull your weight. You remembered the look on his face the first time you’d brought up his mother in an argument; you’d never wanted to hurt him like that but you couldn’t deny the horrible relief at the pain in his eyes. You were glad, actually, that you could hurt him as much as he’d hurt you. You were glad he cared enough for your words to still sting. You regretted it now, though, sat on the floor of your home on your own.

You weren’t always like this: he used to bring you daffodils every day; you used to cook dinner together and dance; you’d laugh together always; the safest you’d ever felt had been in his arms. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d been there, now. You couldn’t remember what it felt like. You still fucked, though, sometimes. He used to love you, properly, but there was nothing but hatred now. You used to cuddle afterwards; he’d place kisses into your hair and onto your skin. And now even when his body was hot against yours, it was cold. You didn’t look at each other in the eyes anymore. You were scared, honestly, of what you would see. Whether you were more afraid of his hatred or your own reflection, you didn’t know. And so, you sat there, feeling the cold wooden floor beneath you, scared and hurt.

It had been months since the last time Sirius had acknowledged you at all. It was your anniversary and you’d gone out to eat. It had been a sordid affair, lifeless and empty. He’d paid, which would’ve been nice, had it not just been out of habit. His eyes had lingered on the waitress. You noticed. When you left, the silence between you was loud and heavy. You walked a foot apart; no one could mistake you for lovers. That might’ve been why the guy shouted at you from the doorway of an abandoned building.

“You alright, sugar tits?”

Your mood soured even further. You just ignored him, but for some reason, he rubbed Sirius the wrong way. Sirius broke his left hand that night, defending your honour, you would’ve said in the past. Now you didn’t know why. You’d wrapped his bruised hand in bandage in an uncharacteristically soft moment for the two of you. It didn’t last. You’d cried during sex that night. You hoped he didn’t notice. The next morning, you woke up to an empty bed again.

Clenching your jaw, deciding you’d had enough, you walked upstairs and into your bedroom. You began to pack a bag, shoving clothes into a rucksack and occasionally wiping your nose with the back of your hand. You thought about when you first met. You were just kids, only seventeen-years-old and partners in Potions. He was absolutely useless, but recklessly charming despite himself.

“Have you tried reading the textbook upside down?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. He opened his mouth indignantly, turned to you with his eyebrows dark and furrowed. And then the corners of his mouth lifted.

“You’re making fun of me.” He realised, suddenly curious about you.

“I am making fun of you.”

“Well, two can play at that game, Y/N.”

You’d been thick as thieves ever since. You got along with his friends and they enjoyed how happy you made him. You’d been so in love that you moved in together straight after you’d graduated; you had no idea what you’d become after that photo was taken just outside, on the driveway.

You were so immersed in your reverie that you hadn’t noticed the front door shut.

“What are you doing?” Sirius asked, standing in the doorway.

Your chest tightened. You bit back a bitter, sacrastic remark, eyes on the bag in front of you.

“I’m leaving, Sirius.”

“What?” he asked, stepping closer. You could smell the perfume on him. It wasn’t yours. “You can’t be serious.”

Your heart clenched. He’d probably ruined that sentence for you for life.

“We can’t carry on like this.”

He was silent for a moment.

“So, you’re just going to- just fucking leave?” he ran a hand through his hair. “Give up on us?”

“There is no us,” you said, finally turning to him. “There stopped being an ‘us’ a long fucking time ago.”

His eyes were dark and shiny with tears. He looked angry. Frustrated. He scoffed.

“Of course, you’d say that.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means this is what you do, Y/N. You give up on things.”

“How dare you.” you watched him laugh sardonically. “How can you say that to me when you’re the one out with other girls?”

He watched your face, he’d hurt you enough times to recognise the way his words changed the shape of your lips, the angle of your brow. He regretted every decision he’d made to lead him to this moment. You, standing across from him, like this.

“Oh, we both know I’m not the only one.”

“Fuck you, Sirius. I would never hurt you like that.”

“Get off your high horse, Y/N.” he spat. “You used everything you could to hurt me.”

You couldn’t deny that. You remembered the arguments.

“Why do you care then? Why do you give a shit if I’m leaving?” Your eyes were wild. Why did you want him to say he loved you? It’s not like it would make it any better.

“Where will you go?”

“Does it fucking matter? Away from here.”

“I’m so sorry living with me was so fucking hard for you.”

He clenched his jaw as you turned to face him again. You ran a shaky hand through your hair before pointing a finger at him. He could see the tears brimming. He wanted to stop so badly. He couldn’t.

“Don’t make it seem like you didn’t notice. I’ve cried every night for the last month. We argue all the time. All the time, Sirius.” He opened his mouth but you cut him off. “We argued last week about who forgot to buy milk even though I didn’t care. We argued yesterday, even, about arguing.”

He knew you were right. It didn’t matter though. He was so tired of all of it but he couldn’t stop himself. He had to show he cared somehow.

“I don’t know what happened to us,” you said, somewhat resigned to the fate of your relationship now. “I’m sorry it ends like this.”

“I can’t believe you’re going to walk out after everything.” He watched you pick up your bag, letting you move past him. He followed you down the stairs. “Don’t you care at all?”

“Of course, I care.”

“It doesn’t bloody look like it.” Sirius shouted, stopping behind you. He grabbed the picture off the wall.

“You were everything to me, Sirius.” You looked down at the picture in his hand; he just stared at your face. “You still are.”

“Then why are you leaving me?” he said softly. His anger dissipated for a moment and you were met with the young boy you’d seen so many years ago. His eyes were full of unshed tears and his chest was almost heaving with emotion. The foolish part of you had hope. You reached over to tuck a fallen strand of hair behind his ear. When he flinched away, your heart broke and what little remained for you in that house died with it.

“Because I have to.”

You wanted to tell him everything. You wanted to give him everything. But you didn’t have anything left to give. You were just an empty shell. You stopped at the front door, sniffling as your tears really started to flow. You heard the sound of the picture hitting the floor, dropped from Sirius’ hand as he sunk to sit on the stairs. You wanted to tell him you loved him and that you always would, that you were sorry for a thousand things. You couldn’t. You opened the door and walked out. You just kept walking. You know that if you stopped, you’d turn back.

Sirius sat on the stairs with his head in his hands for hours. He stopped crying eventually, running out of tears. His eyes stung and his chest ached; he’d nearly pulled his hair out. He sat there, emptier than he had been for a while as he picked up the metal picture frame. He tipped the broken glass onto the ground, looking at the photo inside. It hadn’t been that long ago, not really. But somehow it had been forever. He couldn’t tell, sitting there on the stairs, whether he loved you or hated you, but he figured that, as it had been for a while, the answer was both.

[slutforgoodliterature]

Pietro Maximoff x Reader - Let Me Prove It To You

This was a request from one of you guys! I’m so excited to start doing more requests so feel free to send them in. 

To the babe that requested this, this one’s for you! You know who you are ;)

Summary: Pietro and Wanda are introduced to the rest of the Avengers, and he is immediately drawn to you. You, however, believe that no one like Pietro could ever be into you... until all of a sudden he really, truly, deeply is. 

Warnings: smut (slow burn), angst, dirty talk (in his accent omfggg) 

Hold on to your seats guys and dolls coz it’s gonna be a doozy

AU | that Pietro didn’t die bc that shit is sad as heck, so let's pretend he survived Age of Ultron ok :))

“Listen up you lot!” Tony’s voice rang out across the common area, where he and Steve had called a team meeting. 

They had just returned from a massive fight in Sokovia and brought with them not only a strange floating red man but also a set of arguably stranger twins. 

You had been out of action for the last few weeks due to a couple broken ribs and so had been sent on vacation by Tony. For three weeks, you were peacefully soaking up the sun in Honolulu, Hawaii, until you saw new reports of a freaking floating city with all of your friends on it. 

By the time you had flown back into New York, it was over and dealt with, but you were left feeling useless and unneeded.

“Earth to Y/N,” Steve called, bringing you back to the present, and you went red, even though he was sending you a reassuring smile and there was no real heat behind his words. The whole team knew how you were feeling and tried to comfort you, but there wasn’t much they could say to cheer you up. 

You looked towards the front of the room and were instantly drowning in a pair of cerulean blue eyes that locked onto yours. You froze in place, unable to tear your eyes away. 

The young man who owned those eyes was just as gorgeous. White blonde hair that fell over his forehead, arched brows, a strong jaw, full lips, wide shoulders, narrow hips and-

Wait, are those New Balances? 

You ignored the odd choice of runners and looked back up at this mysterious newcomer’s eyes and were shocked to find he had just down the same sweep of your body as you did to his. His lips curled up in a small grin and he once again caught your gaze, boring into your soul with his piercing eyes. 

“Team, most of you know Wanda and Pietro Maximoff, for those who don’t, this is them.” Tony pointed unceremoniously to the twins and was met with silence. “Cool, good chat.” He sent everyone a thumbs up before briskly leaving the room, probably to find Pepper. 

“He sure has a way with words.” The guy, Pietro, said and his accent caught you unawares. It was rich and silky, like honey in your eyes, and you swear you would have melted into a puddle on the floor if it wasn’t for the kitchen counter you were currently sitting on. 

He shared a smile with his sister before she edged over to the floating red dude. Speaking of...

“Is no one going to introduce floating red guy?” You blurted out, not addressing anyone in particular but finding the entire teams' heads whip your way. 

“Oh right, yes of course, sorry-” Steve began, but floating red guy cut him off with a calm hand raised and landed back on the floor before walking over to you. 

“Allow me, my name is Vision. You are Y/N.” He said simply, holding out a flat palm. You regarded it, completely bewildered as to what you were supposed to do, give him a high five? 

“Um, nice to meet you...” You said and placed your palm on top of his, thinking it was maybe a custom of his, but when his palm began to rise and fall, you were even more at a loss.

“Are you trying to shake her hand?” A sudden voice from over your shoulder made you jump. Somehow, Pietro had moved silently behind you and was watching the strange exchange between you and Vision, his eyebrows furrowed in amusement. 

“Yes. Is that not a common human custom?” Poor Vision said, making Pietro laugh and shake his head. 

“It is, it’s just not whatever you were doing.” He chuckled, stepping in front of you and grasping your hand firmly in his. He began to shake it, but you couldn’t focus on anything except his warm hand in yours. “This is how you shake a hand, Vis.” He stated, continuing to still pump your hands. 

You looked up and saw him looking straight at you once more and you quickly pulled a reign in on your emotions. 

Cut it out, a guy like him would never be into you.

You withdrew your hand abruptly, ending your contact, and thought you noticed a small look of hurt cross Pietro’s face, but of course, there wasn’t one. 

At least, that’s what you told yourself. 

Without another word, you turned around and left the room, unable to stand another second with the boy with the brilliant blue eyes and killer watt smile. 

As the weeks passed, you tried to ignore Pietro, but it proved to be a near-impossible task. 

He always found a way to be around you. Whether it was matching his training schedule to yours, or eating at the same time as you each morning and night, he was always there. 

Slowly but surely, you could feel the inklings of a crush begin to form until they became so strong you were scared you’d accidentally blurt it out in front of him. He wasn’t exactly helping the situation either; he always sat a bit too close on chairs, his hugs lingered for a couple of seconds too long, an innocuous-seeming wink or a squeeze of his hands on your as you traded gym equipment or passed the salt. 

You tried to keep your distance. You kept your conversations brief and answers blunt to the point it became borderline rude. You felt bad, but you needed to keep that layer of animosity there, lest you and your stupid emotions accidentally cross a line. 

One day, just over a month since he and his sister arrived, he cornered you in the training room. 

“Can I ask you a question?” He began abruptly. You regarded him through between your legs as you were bent over trying to stretch them. You realised the current view he had and flushed, straightening up before answering a curt “If you must,” all the while ignoring his eyes. 

“Do you hate me?” He asked in such a simple manner it had you sputtering. 

“What? No, of course not.” You shook your head, still avoiding eye contact, even though you could feel his eyes burning holes in the back of your head. You pretended to be studying the weights intensely, hoping that he would give up and leave you alone. 

I far from hate you...

“Then why are you such a... bitch... to me?” He struggled to find the right word, but when he did, it shocked you. Your jaw dropped, as did the weight in your hand. It was heading straight for your toes but before it could crush them, he had raced over to you and stopped it in its tracks. 

In a blink, he was leaning on the weights rack next to you, toying with the dumbbell in his hands with ease. 

“I am not a bitch.” You clarified, feeling your face slowly redden and heat up. 

So much for thinking he didn’t notice or care. 

“Yes, you are. At least, to me you are.” He argued and he still had a cheeky smile plastered on his face, but you could see real hurt and confusion in his eyes. 

“I...I don’t know what you mean.” You mumbled, turning away from him but he caught your wrist. You glanced at him over your shoulder through lowered lashes. 

“Y/N, please. You can drop the act. I don’t know why you do it, but I know it’s not you.” His hand slowly slipped into yours as he stepped towards you, his fingers intertwining with your own. 

“Stop it.” You whispered, silently willing your legs to move but they wouldn’t. He held you prisoner in his gaze. Your heart was nearly beating through your chest, so loud you were certain he could hear it. 

“Tell me why.” He pleaded, his head dipping closer to yours and your eyes dropped to his lips, which were mere inches away. 

“I...” you began but your tongue became dry and your throat began to close. His proximity was driving you crazy, but although he was so close, he was still so far away. “I can't...”

No one like him could ever like someone like you. 

“That’s a shame because...” He let out a deep sigh and his other hand lifted to cup your face. “...because I like you. A lot.” His confession made you blanch. 

“Don’t say that.” You whipped your head away from his hand and pulled your other hand out of his grip. You were unable to look at him and his blue eyes for fear you would see the insincerity you were sure was there. 

“Y/N-” He reached out to you. 

“No.” You shook your head and began to back away from him. ‘You don’t mean it. Don’t say that.”

“I don't mean it?” His tone was laced with anger and frustration as he repeated what you said, making you flinch. “I don’t mean it?!” In a flash, he was directly in front of you again, towering over you. 

“Pietro, you...you can’t.” You whispered, your voice beginning to shake no matter how hard you tried to hide your emotions. “You can’t like me. You couldn’t.”

He gripped your chin and lifted your head so you could see his face and his narrowed eyes. 

“Who are you to tell me what I mean?” He breathed. “Who I can and can’t like? You don’t get to decide that. That’s my decision and mine alone.” 

He stepped closer to you and rested a hand on your waist, making you draw in a shaky breath. 

“Now, if you don’t like me back, that’s fine. I’ll stay away from you.” His voice shook as he announced that, but he steeled himself. “But don’t run from this because it scares you. It scares me too.” He rested his forehead against yours, stealing your breath away. 

“But you thinking I couldn’t love you... that scares me more.” 

Your eyes widened as you realised he was serious. Your heart began to rejoice and do flips in your chest. You were silent, at a loss for words as he studied your face. 

He took your silence as a refusal and his eyelids fell shut as his lips pulled into a grimace.

“Ok, I’ll leave. I’m sorry-” He was cut off by you grabbing his face and kissing him. 

Hard. 

He froze, and for a second you were scared he was going to take it all back and yell ‘fooled you!’ but he didn’t. He came to life under your hands and circled your waist in his arms, pulling you impossibly close. 

You were broken apart by his uncontainable grin, which you couldn’t help but return. 

“That went better than expected.” He breathed a laugh, keeping his forehead pressed against yours. 

“What did you expect?”  You questioned, tilting your head to the side. 

“Honestly? A slap.” He chuckled and you blushed once again. 

“I’m sorry I’ve been such a...” you thought about how best to describe your abrasive behaviour, but he filled in the gaps for you. 

“Bitch?” He supplied with a laugh and a raised brow. 

“Yeah, a major bitch.” You agreed, laughing with him at your own expense. “I just thought that... well, no one like you could ever...you know...like me or anything.” Your smile fell and he pressed a lingering kiss to your lips. 

“No one like me? An orphaned mutant from a city that no longer exists?” He shook his head and pressed a finger to your lips to stop your protests. “Listen here, princessa.” He stared deeply into your eyes and you felt his gaze caress your soul. 

“I think you are incredible. Beautiful. Amazing. Magical. Stunning. ” With each praise, he mapped your face with kisses. On your nose, your eyelids, your cheeks, your forehead, and finally on the corner of your mouth. “Please, don’t ever doubt that.” 

His words had brought tears to your eyes and you simply nodded, a smile tugging at your lips, and your heart feeling so full it could burst. 

A month had passed since you and Pietro had become ‘an item’, and every day was better than the last. You had fallen in love with him, and in the process, came to love yourself. 

Pietro, on the other hand, was like a giddy teenager. Constantly sneaking heated kisses and touches wherever you were, whether it was in the bedroom or under the table at breakfast, he couldn’t keep his hands off you. Or his eyes.

“Brother, if you don’t quit staring at Y/N you’re going to miss the entire movie,” Wanda said with a smirk one night as a group of you had settled down to watch a film.  You were curled up into his side with your legs tucked beneath you, and his arm was circling you, bringing you closer. 

You looked up to find that he was indeed staring at you. You grinned and pressed a kiss to his lips. 

“But she’s nicer to look at.” He stated simply with a smirk. He was met with a groan from nearly everyone in the room. 

“Yeesh, you guys make me sick.” Natasha fake gagged but sent you a playful smile and a wink anyway. 

“Yeah, get a room, you rabbits.” Tony quipped, making the rest of them laugh at your red face. 

That was one thing that hadn’t happened between you and Pietro. Sex. You had done everything but. It was beginning to make old doubts bubble to the surface. 

Maybe he realised he doesn’t like you like that... 

You scowled at the voice in your head before standing up abruptly. “I’m going to get some water.” You announced to no one in particular. You raced to the kitchen, ignoring the questioning eyes you left behind you. 

You were filling up a glass when you felt him behind you. As silent as a breeze yet as fast as a tornado. 

“What’s up?” He asked, his arms circling you from behind. You shook your head in answer, not trusting your voice to be steady. 

Pietro pressed a kiss to your neck, just below your ear. “Tell me, princessa.” 

You remained silent, taking a big sip from your water to give yourself time to formulate an answer. Before you could, however, Pietro seemed to have figured it out. 

“This is about what Tony said, isn’t it?” He realised. “Y/N, listen-”

“No, Pietro, stop.” You said suddenly, cutting him off. You turned around and twisted out of his arms, distancing yourself from him. “It’s okay if you don’t like me like that-”

“That’s not fair-”

“You don’t have to pretend-”

“You can’t be serious-”

“-that you like me.” 

“Stop.” He growled, rushing over to you and clamping a hand over your mouth. 

You stood in the kitchen, staring at each other, your eyes filled with different emotions. 

Yours with sadness, his with anger. 

“Now, we are going to continue this discussion in my room.” He stated in a deadly calm voice, and before you could protest, he had scooped you up and ran you to his room on the 41st floor, leaving you standing in the middle of the room. 

“Pietro-” You began, reaching out a hand to him but he silenced you with a look. 

“No. Listen to me, Y/N.” He rounded on you and began to advance towards you. “You’re so smart, but you’re also so fucking naïve sometimes.” He growled, stepping towards you, making you take a step back. 

You stayed silent, knowing better than to talk at this point. And also because you felt guilty about upsetting him. 

“I didn’t want you to think I was just using you for sex.” He explained, running a hand through his hair. He took another step towards you, and you mirrored him by taking yet another step back

Realisation dawned on you and you felt even more guilty if that was even possible. “I’m sorry, Pietro.” You whispered sincerely.“I didn’t realise-” 

“I’m sorry I made you doubt me.” He said, taking another step forward. “I’m even more sorry that this has taken so long.”

 The next steps you both took had you backed up into the wall, the cold plaster causing goosebumps to rise across your back. 

In the blink of an eye, he was pressing you against the wall with his hips and was holding your arms above your head, trapping you there. 

“Don’t you know what you do to me?” He whispered and ground his hips against yours. 

You could definitely feel what you were doing to him. 

“Please,” you gasped, feeling his lips ghost the shell of your ear. 

“I’m going to fuck you, princessa.” He promised and you let out a moan at his words. “But first, I’m going to worship you.” 

Without another word, he dropped to his knees in front of you and yanked down your jeans and panties before you could suck in another breath. He circled his arms around your thighs and pulled your legs over his shoulders. 

You carded a hand through his hair and he held eye contact with you as he pressed a kiss on the inside of both of your thighs before placing one straight over your core. Your hand tightened in his hair.

Pietro licked a stripe up your centre, flicking his tongue around your clit. You let out a moan and your head fell back against the wall, your eyes squeezed shut.

“Look at me, princessa.” He ordered, and you complied, regarding him through half closed eyes. “I want you to watch me as I make you cum with my mouth.” 

He delved into the heat between your legs, licking and sucking and nipping. You writhed against his mouth, biting your lip in an effort to keep quiet but it was no use. 

His tongue teased your entrance before suddenly sliding inside, creating a whole new sensation in you. You gasped and arched your back, driving his tongue further inside you. 

The sensation of a tidal wave of pure pleasure building in your lower stomach was torturing you, all brought on by the man between your legs and his magical tongue. You ached to have his fingers in you, or better yet, his dick. 

“Pietro,” You moaned, which made him look up at you in question, but he never took his mouth off you. “I need you inside me.” 

He just shook his head in response and you could feel him smirk against you.  His nose bumped against your clit, sending your head into a spin. 

“Please...” You groaned, but he ignored your requests and simply sped up his tongue, eager to bring you to orgasm. 

As he coaxed you closer and closer to the edge, your legs began to quiver around his head. His tongue delved in deeper and with a speed you knew was only possible with him. 

You tried to grind yourself against him but he held your hips still with a strong grip, only allowing you the pleasure he was willing to give to you. 

He sucked hard at your clit before biting down on your bundle of nerves ever so gently, and that was it. 

The knot in your stomach unravelled, and you along with it. It was impossible to keep your eyes open, and you screamed his name as your head tipped back against the wall.

Your legs shook as he carried you through your high with his tongue. The next thing you know, the softness of his comforter replaced the hard wall on your back and your head was nestled on a pillow. 

He’d carried you to his bed and laid you down softly, lying over you and caging you in with his arms. 

His eyes were filled with adoration, but also the hint of the hardness you knew always existed below the surface. 

“Do you still doubt me?” He asked, trailing a hand up your side and under your shirt. 

“It was never you I doubted.” You breathed, still trying to catch your breath after your mindblowing orgasm. 

His eyes widened infinitesimally and he sat up abruptly on his heels, looking down at you from between your legs. He pulled his shirt off in a single tug and your eyes dropped to his chest and abdominals. 

This man is a god.

He dipped back over you, arching his back into you as he ravaged your mouth with his own and ground his tracksuit-clad hips over your dripping pussy. You moaned into his mouth and traced his abs with your fingertips, earning a low groan in response. 

His hand cupped your heat, sending shivers down your spine and causing a litany of curses to leave your mouth. 

“Who did this to you, princessa?” He growled, slipping a finger between your folds. 

“Y-You did.” You managed to get out between hitched breaths. 

“And who is going to fuck you until you can’t walk?” He pushed down his pants and boxers until he was able to kick them off, leaving you both naked apart from your top.

“You are.” You breathed and allowed him to slide your top over your head and fling it across the room with great speed. 

“Who do you belong to?” He murmured against your skin, tracing his lips across the top of your breasts. You arched your back so he could unclip your bra and skillfully remove it from you. 

He sucked a nipple into his mouth and pinched the other, sending shockwaves to your core.

“You.” You answered, cupping his jaw and guiding his lips back to yours, where he met you with a punishing kiss. You could feel him lining up at your entrance and you wrapped your legs around his waist, encouraging him closer. 

“And who loves you?” He whispered as he slowly began to enter you. Your eyes widened and you sharpened your gaze on him in shock. 

“Wha-” He gripped your jaw and pressed his forehead against yours as he slowly entered you, never breaking eye contact. 

“I said,” With a single thrust, he buried himself in you completely, laying a firm hand on your pelvis to stop your hips from writhing against him in pleasure. “Who loves you?” 

He regarded you with such sincerity that you couldn’t return his intense stare, but the grip he had on your jaw refused to let you look away. 

“Tell me.” He demanded, not moving inside you. You swallowed your fears, doubts and insecurities and levelled his gaze with yours. 

“You do.” As you said it, you felt a smile overcome your features. “You love me.”

His eyes darkened with lust, and what you knew now to be love, and he kissed you passionately. You wrapped your hands around his biceps and gave yourself fully to him. 

He drew out of you and thrust in again slowly. The little discomfort you had felt at the beginning was melting away and sheer, toe-curling pleasure was taking over.

You were still sensitive from your last orgasm, so every drag of his hips and drive of his cock in you added quickly to the coiling behind your navel. 

You dug your nails into the flesh of his back as he continued his languid strokes. You could feel every vein of his member, its pulsating heat as it pushed and pulled you closer and closer to the edge. 

“You’re mine,” Pietro growled against your lips, his hand on your hip tightening so much that you knew there was going to be a bruise there tomorrow, but you relished in it. 

As if to prove his point, he traced a trail of kisses to your neck where he began to suck and nibble a large hickey. 

“All yours...only yours, Pietro.” You agreed in moans, running your hands through his hair and tugging when the sensations became too much. 

You were so close, and you told him so. 

“Hold on, princessa.” He groaned, his hand cupped your jaw so gently that it threw you off balance; the rough snaps of his hips and the loving stroke of his thumb on your jaw. 

“I want you to remember who made you like this, Y/N.” He said, his jaw clenching with the effort it took to hold off his impending orgasm. “Every time you close your eyes, you’re going to see me fucking you into the mattress.” 

His accent along with his dirty words made your eyes roll into your head and you were so close you were certain you were going to fall off the edge with his next thrust. 

“Say my name as you cum, baby.” He growled and the hand on your hip dipped to rub circles across your clit. 

You exploded. Or maybe imploded is the right word. 

His breath ghosting across your face as he whispered his native tongue to you, telling you to cum, his hand on your clit, his cock hitting spots in you that you didn’t know could cause so much pleasure... it was enough to bring tears to your eyes as your soul detached and shattered into a million particles. 

Like you were told, you screamed his name as you orgasmed, your hands scraping down his back and your legs shaking around his waist as he continued to thrust into you, spurring on the waves of pleasure that assaulted you. 

As you came down from your high, you caressed his face gently and looked deep into his eyes. 

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” You murmured over and over again before he captured your lips with his and emptied himself in you.

His eyes screwep up and he let out a loud moan as he too reached his climax. 

The last throes of your orgasm released you as he collapsed on top of you, his head buried in the crook of your neck. 

He rolled off you and onto his back, dragging you with him and pulling you until you lay across his chest, your head resting over his loudly beating heart and your arms wrapped around each other. 

“I love you, Y/N.” He whispered into your hair and you felt like you could fly away, you were that happy. 

“I love you too, Pietro.” You tilted your head up and he kissed you sweetly on the mouth. 

“That was something else.” He murmured as you both came up for air. 

“Yeah, it was pretty...” You struggled to adequately describe the sex you just had. 

“Mindblowing?” He offered with a cheeky grin. 

“Exactly. Mindblowing.” You agreed and tucked your head back under his chin. 

“You didn’t see that coming?” He questioned playfully. 

“A month ago, definitely not.” You stated, tracing circles on his chest. 

“And now?” He coaxed and this time it was you with the cheeky grin as you raised your head to look at him and hitched an eyebrow.

“Now...I wanna see how fast you really are.” You winked at him.

Pietro was suddenly the one blushing and flipped you onto your back in less than a second. 

“Oh, you’re on.” He laughed and attacked your mouth with his. 

You never doubted yourself after that. 

[buckleyydiaz]

random moreid fic idea!! reid and morgan were online boyfriends years before joinign the bau, but ended bc of long distance. they meet again on reid’s first day and he immediately recognizes morgan, even though he’s gotten taller and more muscular, and when gideon introduces him to the team as “dr. spencer reid” morgan’s speechless, and its slow burn from there ♥︎♥︎

here is chapter one! sorry this has taken a while! also on ao3 here

if you weren’t just an online romance 1/?, 900 words, moreid

summary: 

It would without a doubt come as a great shock to the Behavioural Analysis Unit team members that Derek had been in a long term relationship, and at that, a committed one, not a quick fling or dalliance more about sex than emotions.

It would not, however, surprise them that this had been a one time occurrence, although there were a myriad of other elements of it that would. Primarily? That it had been with a man, but also that it occurred online, and that even over a year after the relationship’s end, he would still go back to Spencer without a second thought.

Apparently, Gideon had a new protege. A kid, who from all Derek had heard, despite being quite the genius, barely made it into the FBI, with the usually mandatory fitness tests being waived for him, and no attempt even being made to try and give him a gun. That was, if the rumour mill was to be trusted.

To say Derek was unexcited to meet the new kid would be an understatement - the last thing he needed was to have to look after some hopeless, useless newbie, pretend that he liked him, and wait out him inevitably leaving when he realised what the job really involved, that it wasn’t some desk job where he could solve problems, but a real, hands on job, where people got hurt, died, and that was life.

Whilst he trusted Gideon, he was also slightly skeptical of the supposed genius - how smart could he really be? After meeting Spencer, his ex-boyfriend, Derek had gained very high standards for the capabilities of a genius, and he wasn’t sure this newbie would reach them.

The other team members did not seem so doubtful about the kid, which almost made Derek feel bad, but Derek had not been a trusting person for a long time, so he figured he could excuse it - this wasn’t something specific to this incoming kid. It wasn’t as though he wanted the new guy to be a disappointment either, he just preferred to brace himself for it.

His eyes alternated between the door and the clock as he awaited the kid’s arrival, occasionally glancing back down at his work to keep up the image that he was actually doing work - not that anyone was fooled, nor cared. Most of the team were buzzing with excitement over the new agent’s imminent arrival, a pleasant change from the gloom that had seemed to be stuck over them for the months following Agent Hazelton’s death, since Gideon’s suspension. Even if he wasn’t excited about the idea of the new kid, and who he was, Derek did desperately hope that some new blood would help make this shift a permanent one.

It seemed as though the newbie couldn’t even be on time on his first day, something which frustrated Derek to no end. Not only was he going to end up having to babysit this guy who hadn’t even been able to properly get into the FBI, but he was going to have to deal with someone who was either highly disorganised, had really bad luck, or was just chronically late - none of which were things that were good qualities for an agent in the BAU. Gideon really must be losing it if he thought that this kid was going to work on the team, and Derek hadn’t even met him yet.

“Hello, my delicious piece of chocolate!” Garcia said excitedly as she walked to his desk.

“Hey Baby Girl,” Derek responded, grateful for the distraction from the door and the clock, both of which were quickly losing interest, despite knowing that any minute, the new 

“Do you know when the new guy is coming?” she asked, beginning her standard rapidfire speaking, “He is supposed to be starting today, right? I can’t wait to meet him, although I’m sure he will be nowhere near as perfect as you!”

Derek couldn’t help but grin - he really had found his (platonic) soulmate in Penelope Garcia, even when he was moping about a new agent, she could brighten up his day immeasurably. He swore it was some kind of magic power of hers - if anyone were to have magic, it would be her, anyway.

“The newbie is running a bit late, I think, that’s all. And I had better hope that you don’t plan on letting this kid replace me! Can’t have anyone stealing my girl!”

That was when Derek realised how quiet the rest of the bullpen had gone, highlighting the single gasp that he heard following his words. He turned his head around again to face the door, where he had neglected looking during his quick chat with Garcia, and saw the source of the noise.

A familiar set of eyes met his, and he quickly took in the man in front of him - although he was slightly taller and healthy looking than when Derek had last seen him, the cute face, the lanky limbs, the nerdy haircut - they all gave him away.

It was all that Derek could do to keep his jaw from dropping to the floor at the sight, the sight of a man he had never expected to see again, not in real life, not in the office, not anywhere but in his dreams.

But there he was, as clear as day, as real as everyone else in the building with them. 

Gideon cleared his throat, getting everyone’s attention, stopping the eyes of those around them from flickering between Derek, Garcia and the new agent, releasing it was much more important to listen to what the Senior Agent was about to discuss than to contemplate the newbie’s shock at Derek and Garcia’s slightly unconventional friendship.

“As you all are aware, today we are getting a new agent joining this team. I would like you all to meet Dr. Spencer Reid, the BAU’s newest team member.”

Not that he had ever doubted it, but Derek’s recognition had been correct. This definitely would not go well.

[seoafin]

jjk & tower of god chapter on the same day,,, i spent all of my brainjuice talking abt tog w some friends + working on my wip so this one might be incoherent LMAO but nsjdhfjd this my 2 cents for the chp (1) - 🐱

first of all, the zenins shld just eat shit 🥰 the bar is just nonexistant now 😭😭😭

also maki’s mother said sth that hits way too close to home for me too🥴

the maki & mai, megumi & tsumiki "make a place where they are happy” parallels...mai,, maki wanted a place where u'd be happy!!! 😭😭😭 good points abt any interesting nuances the original jpn might have had though

ALSO MUSCLE MAKI IS HERE

and lmao megumi's "ew no" face ,,, i didn't think he could make a face like that JDJJDJD ,, once again i think his outsider-insider status is interesting but the amount of ppl counting on him/leaning on him bc of strategic position is a lot. ig this is what kamo meant by supporting the 3 families,,,, gojou indeed is playing the long game. megumi in the meantime, very persistent in not getting more involved in clan politics, not using power that is offered to him, or leveraging it - in a way it is good, and it also makes sense with "stress is other ppl" but is interesting from a structural pov. megumi may not rly give a shit abt the rest of the jujutsu world. if the ppl close to him are affected, then he cares. otherwise, forget it.

also im interested in power implications here bcs it sound a little like there’s a slight split b/w leadership and everyday zenins and im curious what it's like if u have no connection to the top of the clan,, and again higher ups being unaffiliated with the 3 clans so they have to appeal to them. curious what other talents the gojou clan have and what they're known for bc clearly it's not just gojou, they still have power without him and still have a stake in the shifting power structure. kamo must be busy too...

MAKIIIIII ,,, honestly my heart hurts a little seeing her getting beat up in recent chapters. but i’m rly happy,, shes FINALLY getting the focus she deserves and i’m confident she will make a recovery and she IS in fact the one leading efforts on the zenin side. im rly hopeful she can take over the clan one day and no longer say she's not good enough

that stomach wound is bad news though so im wondering how she will come back from that,, that she didn't know her own father's abilities says a lot, too. i wonder if she could see the extension of his blade, or if she hasn't been able to see/understand many ppl abilities

im hopeful for next chp now. u can do it maki!!!!

flashing back on these bits, it makes more sense now why megumi wasn't melting down post-shibuya,, seems most information came to him in a sort of timely and calm way? also i rly have to wonder if gojou did not spend a decade plotting in front him bcs he's done it before,,,, like the whole clan head scene in megumi's middle school years....in a way i imagine he wouldve seen that gojou come out of the high school and watch him get more serious as he acquired even more skin in the game

all the time though i wonder abt megumi's tendency toward inertia and nonaction to things that would seemingly give him power and trying to understand it and that IS him being selfish and that IS,, imo the biggest indication of what he actually does or doesn't want. he wants it, he will act and work on it immediately himself. he doesn't like it? act like it doesn't exist. it make me want to shake him around like NO!! megumi pay attention!!! But his reaction to this clan stuff is a contrast to his behavior in recent chapters imo

and more mahjong references,,, between this and yuuji’s pachinko,, i wonder abt the undercurrent of gambling haha. a gamble for the shaman world and who will come out on top? a contrast to the flowy ocean imagery that connects shaman stuff out to the rest of the world

also this ,,,, there's that one jp tweet (i cant find it again😞) that talks about how toji, as the point of distortion, created megumi, who is currently playing a potential convergence/healing/uniting role (if he actually takes it on as a responsibility lol) and connects this back to the medicine buddha,,, whose mudra (hand sign) is used for chimera shadow garden. with the commentary abt ppl with heavenly restriction needing to know what to throw away in order to become strong or tap into their full strength and toji’s commentary at the end of fight with gojou,,  i actually always felt that toji died not having been entirely resolved with himself bc he talks abt going against the self that decided to forget abt self-respect, to live without thinking abt himself or others,,, in a way, living selfishly, for himself, by ignoring anything immediate and i think he succeeded for a while bc he didnt even remember megumi's name. he remembers it when he talks to getou abt him being thankful for toji not killing him bc of potential drawbacks

and at the very end he thinks of megumi again and that last act does think of someone else, like a "life before your eyes" moment where toji thinks about how the zenin's treatment of him led him there or how his return to shibuya ends with him remembering how he gave megumi back to the zenin,,, i think atm of his death he was starting to think he did want to care, in a different way, or that he needed a different paradigm. or,, maybe he was just starting to realize how far the zenin thinking had set into him

so we dont rly talk abt that being an enlightenment moment for toji but i kind of think it was. that megumi has the potential to become a pivotal piece as a legacy of distortion is interesting. i dont actually think toji set up everything intentionally bc he didnt know megumi's ability, and i dont think he wouldve thought that far. i think a lot of the heir and inheritance stuff is sth naobito set in after seeing megumi's development under gojou. it's clear now everyone has been keeping eyes on everyone else

at some point there's some interesting discussion to be had abt megumi and privilege - i'm surprised the canon characters dont hate him more for having stuff just fall into his lap, and so i liked that maki pointed this out that he could use this and he shld bc theres a frustration there - and yet at the same time megumi himself seemingly feels very little attachment to the zenin and the shaman world still. he just cares abt his little circle of people, and it's a very intentional choice, based on his good/bad ppl thing

u cant really affect the entire world, but u can assert urself on the environment around u and decide what u do and dont act on. this part of megumi is more teenage boy and kind of toji-like, i think,,, hence the emphasis on action

u express ur effect and existence through action, who u kill or who u save. toji having very little, while so much falls into megumi's lap while he doesn't want it, doesn't want to acknowledge it, likely doesn't want to take part in a system he doesn't like or, having been raised under gojou's wing, resents or finds corrupt or useless, or doesn't even think on bc he thinks its above his pay grade and gojou's there - this is also megumi's moment to solidify his own direction and commit to working in the system or out of it

the "not caring" is a defensive measure in a way too, i think. i dont think megumi is Big Good and wants to save everyone and everything and the world to be good and pure, i tend to think of him as a resigned chaotic neutral, who wishes he could be good orz

ANYWAY i think there's some interesting juxtapositions with the whole toji > megumi thing, that someone who is born without, restricted, births and creates someone full of blessings. its very shaman-like, action then reaction

AND i wish u luck on ur final paper (bless ur eyes to see incels bc i’ll just log off for the day when i saw one (1) of them on the net) AND DONT FORGET TO TAKE A REST,, the self care is much needed me thinks <333 (2) - 🐱

i love u 🥺🥺😭😭😭 you take care of yourself too!!!

also ur right...all this political intrigue im so curious i need to know how the jujutsu world is structured in terms of the higher ups and the clans. like i assumed that the three clan elders WERE to some extent also part of the higher ups???? but now it seems that the higher ups are a separate entity altogether, so like checks and balances i suppose. except both the higher ups and the clans are corrupt so no balance there 😭

the chapter implied the zenins are losing when it comes to the power struggle between the three clans. im interested. i want to see them all rot!!! like i also said though it’s going to be interesting to see the state of the kamo clan though, considering “noritoshi kamo.” like what do you even say to that???? im going to be surprised if it doesn’t affect their standing in the jujutsu world but then again the kamo clan IS one of the big three.

megumi really is a character that was blessed in all regards but like. doesn’t want anything to do with it LOL he really said ‘this is a pain no thanks.’ like gojo like megumi i suppose. i agree with u the whole toji and megumi set up....genius....i also love their juxtaposition. it’s so interesting and another source of irony.

[bnha-dumpster]

Shattering: Chapter 5

FIRST | PREVIOUS | Chapter 5 | NEXT

Shattering: A TodoBakuDeku x Reader fic (more TodoBaku with hints of Deku) Plot: After losing Deku and your two best friends, you didn’t think much more could be taken away from you. You’ve never been more wrong. Words: 1.5k

a/n: this is a lil shorter compared to the other chapters but that’s bc chapter six is gonna be really long

“Y/N was so cute!” There’s a grin on Midoriya’s face. He’s standing in the middle of the room, looking back and forth between Bakugou and Todoroki. He’s boasting about his encounter with you, everything about it. “He didn’t even fight back when I grabbed him, he didn’t think of using his Quirk or anything! He just stood there and pathetically let me hurt him. Y/N’s really become something sad, something weak. He’s helpless now. To think that we did that to him!”

“You did it to him, not us.” Todoroki glares at him.

“But you did! You left him all alone to grieve and mourn for me. Do you really think that didn’t do anything to him?”

“Even if we did, it’s nothing compared to the damage you did, Deku!” From his position on the wall, Bakugou is only able to lurch forwards so much. He barely misses the villain. “And if you hurt Y/N again, I swear I’ll-”

Midoriya kicks him in the stomach and Bakugou hits the wall. 

“You’ll what, Kaachan? You can’t do anything! You’re stuck here! But I can go and see him again. If you don’t behave, I’ll go visit Y/N and punish him for your bad behavior. If you behave, Y/N won't get hurt!”

“You piece of shit, Deku!” 

The villain only laughs and leaves the room. Todoroki and Bakugou are forced to watch the door close and hear the lock click. On the other side of the door, Midoriya is laughing to himself. Compared to you, they have so much energy and rage. They’re ready to jump and kill him. You though, are nothing more than a depressed and helpless citizen. He can really do anything he wants to you, can’t he? If he really wanted to, he could do all the things he wanted to do to you when you were at UA. He won’t, though. He’ll be patient and wait until he has to see you again.

And you, exhausted, buy a turtleneck and a large scarf. You’re lucky it’s winter. The turtleneck and scarf hide the deep purple bruise Midoriya gave you. It’s in the shape of his hand. You can’t write that off as anything, though you wouldn’t be able to pass off any sort of neck bruise of this size. 

The threats he made are still clear in your mind. There’s no way you’re going to risk anything on the chance that he’ll do it. He almost certainly will. 

You stumble into the Bakugou household. The sight of Aizawa, Endeavor, Hawks and a few of your friends in the living room catches you off guard. You’re quick to smile and wave. They don’t. Aizawa comes to rest his hand on your shoulder, giving you a concerned look. 

“Staff at UA said they saw you being attacked by Midoriya. Is this true?”

You force a smile and laugh, “Of course not. You know I’d fight back, guys.”

Despite your smile, you’re not convincing at all. They can all see right through you, but they don’t push. At least, until they notice the scarf you definitely didn’t have before. Before pulling away, Aizawa unravels the scarf from your neck gently. Eyes widen when you don’t fight back. No, you begin to tremble when his hand comes close to the skin of your neck. With the scarf unravelled in Aizawa’s hand, your hand shaped bruise is on full display.

The person that steps forward to take a look is Endeavor, which surprises everyone. His hold is oddly gentle as he lifts your chin up to inspect the bruise.

“Trying to hide something like this is useless.” The hero scolds you, letting go of your chin and stepping back.

“He said that if I told you, something bad would happen. Please pretend you don’t know about it. Please, everyone.” Your voice cracks slightly at the end. They share looks before nodding as much as they don’t want to. With the way you’re acting, it’s obvious how vulnerable and helpless you’ve become over the years. Your friends want to protect you. Yet, as they stare at you and the large bruise around your neck, they know they can’t.

“You should go home, Y/N.” 

“Yeah, I should.” You ghost your fingers over the bruise. “... Can someone at least show me how to wrap this up in bandages?”

The store is quiet like always around noon. You can’t say that this is the best place to get lunch, but some people do. It’s a nice break from the bustle of the morning. Your father is taking inventory in the back and your mother is home, she’s sick. Besides the few customers that trickle in every now and then, you’re alone in the front of the store.

You stop yourself from running your hands along your bandages. Clean, well applied bandages are wrapped around your neck, hiding the bruise quite well. The edges stick out, but you can hide them with your clothes. No one says anything. They all mind their own business despite the odd stares and concerned looks the older people give you. At one point, an elderly woman reached across the counter to hold your hand and told you, “Don’t be afraid to reach out for help,” in such a soft voice you almost cried. If only you could.

Behind you, a small radio plays. It’s always tuned to Present Mic’s station. You find comfort in hearing his voice when he pops in. He has a contagious positivity that affects you even through the radio. His choice of music also happens to be good. You lean on the counter and listen to the American pop song he chose to play. Even if you don’t understand the words, you find it fun to listen to. The rhythm is easy going and distracts you from everything.

“You always look so happy when you listen to Present Mic’s radio station.” Your father walks out of the back room with a box of soda. He lets you look inside of it, only to sigh when you reach and grab one out of it. It’s to be expected. The limited peach flavored coke is your favorite.

“You better pay for that.” 

“Take it out of my paycheck, Dad.” You give him a grin and uncap it, taking a sip. “Nothing’s going to stop me from drinking at least a few of these. Not even you, Dad.”

He scoffs at you and ruffles your hair. Glancing at your bandages for a moment, he sighs, “It’s still not healing?” 

“It’s only been a few days. I’m sure it’ll heal and I’ll be able to take this off. Let’s be patient.” As much as you try to reassure your Dad, you know you can’t. When you came back and you told your parents what happened, they were immediately concerned. They’ve been watching you ever since despite you saying that if Midoriya shows up, they might get hurt. A parent’s need to protect their child is strong. At least with your parents.

Thankfully, settling back into Akita City has been smooth. You’re staying in contact with Aizawa, Mic and Iida for now. Honestly, you’re not sure how much more you can handle. When you close your eyes, you keep thinking back to how right Midoriya was. Leaving UA and everyone behind has only made you weaker. You haven’t used your Quirk in years and you freeze up whenever you get scared. That’s not something a hero does. 

You let your mind wander while the store stays empty. How are Bakugou and Todoroki right now? You hope that they’re okay.

They’re not.

Currently, blood is dripping from Todoroki’s busted lip. He’s not sure why he’s the one being beaten when Bakugou is the one who always yells. The blond is watching from the other side of the room, glaring at Midoriya. It’s a tense situation and yet, Midoriya is smiling.

“I’m kind of curious. You’re both so protective of Y/N. After pushing him away and making him so weak, you act like you should be the one taking care of him. Why’s that?” He pauses and when Todoroki doesn’t answer, he kicks the hero in the chest. Todoroki coughs and curls in on himself for a moment. When he manages to lift his head up, he lets out a growl that not even Bakugou has heard before. 

“Why are you so fascinated by Y/N?” 

“You need to answer my question first, Shouto!” 

“He’s not going to answer your question, Deku. Answer his first.” A harsh kick is sent straight to Bakugou’s face. His nose breaks and he sputters over and over until he feels like he can breathe again. Despite his circumstances, the blond sneers and spits, “You’ll have to do better than that, nerd.” 

He expects another kick to the face, only for Midoriya to spin around and cackle at his statement. There’s a look of glee, absolute amazement on his face. 

“Well, now I’ll have to do better Kaachan! At least I get to go visit Y/N again.” Midoriya shrugs and sighs, almost as if he’s frustrated. “But I’ll tell you. I find Y/N really cute and fun to watch. He was always so wary around me but me leaving affected him so much. Isn’t that funny?”

Both heroes tense and look at each other. It only takes a few seconds for Midoriya to figure out why, especially knowing how protective they are of you. 

“You both like him! Maybe I’ll tell him when I see him next.”

[dudeandduchess]

Hurt your readers week ideas 😂 The reader not being able to have kids, but Kyo says he can get past it even tho he wanted a large family. He has two options. Live the rest of his life with his wife and be the uncle forever with this deep ache inside of him feeling like he missed out on part of life. Or asking his wifey if they could have a surrogate which means giving him permission to sleep with another woman (bc it's ye olden times), which goes horribly. Either way he loses but he loves her.

Hi, Biz. Hope this is heartbreaking enough for you. 😂✨

This is something that had been a personal issue for me as well, so I may have gone over the essential amount of self-loathing and anger that Kyō’s s/o needed to get her feelings across. 😂

***

Kyōjurō x F!S/O: Barren (SFW Scenario):

Warnings: Angst with Happy Ending (?), Talks of Infertility, So Many Feels, Toxic Womanly Beliefs (i.e. a woman is only a woman if she can bear kids for her husband; which I don’t think is true), Open-Ended Ending

The heaviness in the air couldn’t even compare to the heavy feelings that weighed down on (Y/n)’s heart. No matter how hard she tried to tell herself that things were fine— that she was fine— she couldn’t get herself to believe in her empty words.

Because she wasn’t fine. At all.

Her heart was breaking so much, at the very knowledge that something essential to a woman had been taken away from her. There was no way to know for sure what the problem with herself was, but she knew that it had to do with her body.

After being married to Kyōjurō for five years, and having been together for seven, they should have already had children— what with them trying so hard to conceive after all those years.

“Useless,” She breathed out through the tightness in her throat, biting down on her bottom lip as she buried her face in her hands. And it was then that the tears she had desperately been trying to hold back began to fall; one by one, in hot rivulets that smeared across her face— as her palms were pressed flush against her clammy skin.

(Y/n) tried to breathe through the pain she felt, yet didn’t get any sort of reprieve from her efforts. Even with the sobs that wracked her body, she still felt no lightness in her chest, which usually came when she cried.

Yet that time was different; as it seemed that her sadness and guilt weighed down heavily on her heart, to the point where she couldn’t even breathe.

“(Y/n)? I’m home!” The sound of her husband’s warm voice echoed throughout their estate, which had her sobbing even more— as the guilt inside her festered even more.

Her thoughts centered around nothing but her being a failure as a woman, because she couldn’t even get her body to function properly. And, with gritted teeth, she pushed her hands up into her hair— just so she could pull at the locks in her own self-loathing and frustration.

Quiet yet keening sobs bubbled free from her lips, as more and more of her tears fell from her eyes.

“(Y/n)? Where a-” Kyōjurō couldn’t even finish his sentence, because when his eyes landed right on his crying wife, he practically tossed his sword aside to race over to where she sat in the living room.

She was practically curled in on herself, with her hands still pulling tightly on her hair— while the most heartbroken cry he’d ever heard from her pierced the air. Never in the seven years that they had been together had Kyōjurō ever seen her look so anguished; to the point where she was in the midst of an emotional breakdown.

The Hashira knelt down next to his wife, quickly but carefully getting her to let go of her hair. It was a tad difficult, what with her still pulling at the silken threads but— when he did manage to remove her hands— he pulled her arms up around his neck, so that he could hug her to his chest.

He could feel his own tears pricking his eyes, yet he pushed them back in an effort to remain strong in front of (Y/n).

“What has you so heartbroken, my love?” Kyōjurō asked softly, as he cradled the back of her head with his left hand, while the right one smoothed her disheveled hair down.

Still, only the sounds of (Y/n)’s sobs answered him. She then held on to him tighter, before burying her face against the crook where his neck and shoulder met.

And after what seemed like an eternity, she answered— albeit thickly and choppily through her tears, “I’m sorry, Kyō. I’m so sorry that I’m a useless wife.”

Anger flared up within Kyōjurō at that and, even though his code of ethics told him to never hurt someone weaker than him, he still wanted to knock some sense into whoever had made his wife feel so horrible; preferably with his fists.

“I’m so sorry that I can’t give you any children.”

Those words took the wind right out of the young man’s proverbial sails. He felt his heart practically drop into his stomach, as the thoughts he’d desperately tried to push to the back of his mind resurfaced.

It was true that he’d always wanted kids— lots of them, in fact— and that he and his wife had been trying for a long time, yet still weren’t blessed with any; so he resigned himself to being happy for his friends who did have children. He would often volunteer to babysit his fellow Hashiras’ kids when they needed days off, because he wanted to experience what it would have been like if he and (Y/n) had their own kids.

His heart would sink every time he saw her with children, as it was a constant reminder of what they didn’t have; yet he never bothered to speak about it, because to put it into light would only hurt (Y/n) and make her feel inadequate.

And that was the last thing that he wanted to make her feel.

Kyōjurō loved her too much for that, and he would rather die than ever think of cheating on her just to get a wish of his fulfilled. She was much more important than any dream of his; because she— as he believed— was the one thing in his life that he got right.

“I’m so sorry that I can’t make you happy,” (Y/n) uttered through her bawling, curling her fingers into the soft and sturdy material of his haori— in an effort to keep herself afloat in the proverbial sea of her feelings. “I’m sorry.”

(Y/n) kept repeating her apologies, even though most of them had begun to sound garbled through her tears. But she kept going, as if apologizing to her husband over and over would make things right.

But she was silenced when Kyōjurō hugged her even tighter, and began peppering kisses along the top of her head. He couldn’t hold back his own sad tears, because seeing her in so much pain like that was one of the most heart-wrenching things he had ever witnessed.

It was made even worse with the feeling of helplessness that pooled inside him; as her pain wasn’t one that could be taken away by medicine or rest— her pain was something that dwelled much deeper, and lied somewhere where even he couldn’t reach. He knew that he could only do so much to help her, and that tore at him even more.

“You do make me happy, (Y/n). And you’re not useless,” Kyōjurō answered thickly, as his own tears kept running down his cheeks in warm streaks. “We’ll figure it out, okay? We’ll go to Shinobu tomorrow and get you checked up again.”

He knew that he was rambling, but it was all that he could do to keep himself from breaking down as well. “And if she still can’t help us, we’ll go to the city. One day at a time, my love.”

Another press of his lips was dropped against the crown of her head, and he pulled her in even closer— as tight as he could hold her without it being uncomfortable for her; as all Kyōjurō wanted was to make his wife feel whole again.

And the action perfectly relayed the parallels of him trying to hold her broken pieces together; because that was the case: He was the only one who still kept her going.

“You don’t ever have to be sorry for something that wasn’t your fault, (Y/n).”