#other than that. just know theres gonna probably be at least 8 in total

[mikkokomori]

I have......the dreaded midterms this week I'm gonna die ahahahhaah

[claudiathegremlin]

im bored, so im gonna rant about alastor's breakdown scene

deal with it

(i also may have lost the post with most of my info but whatever shut up/j)

WARNING: MAJOR spoilers for for hazbin hotel

if you havent watched it all the way through, id reccomend that-

also speak of sensitive topics such as father issues, mental breakdowns,

i feel like i should say this, i am NOT a psychiatrist, in ANY way shape or form, and im just speaking from prior knowledge and experience, aand also my friend who has studied psychology and all that jazz immensely (say hi to ros! :)

i also make an excess of unnecessary and dumb jokes so if you cant handle that bye i guess (/j)

(will also include random images here and there of him, bcz why not)

okay, so i dont think its that much of a secret that alastor is NOT okay, mentally (and physically, i mean, look at that gash thats not healthy smh)

it could NOT have been made ANY clearer that theres something wrong going on in this mans head, and its... uhm whats the word help ive backed myself in to a corner here

theres more than one s o m e t h i n g thats wrong, i guess, and im here to give my opinion and theory on the matter so uhhhhhh

make sure to SMASH THAT LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE BUTTON FOR MORE AMAZING CONTENT1!1!1!!/j

okay very dumb and idiotic jokes aside smh, im gonna explore and explain each one of the reasons i think this guy is not okay, starting with

d r u m r o l l

father issues! yayyyyy amazinggggg totally not horrible haha whaatt.. anyways, there are numerous hints that alastor had, at the very least, a very problematic father, and, hey, ever notice how he's more comfortable around women?? and that he was a confirmed 'mamma's boy'? yeah, based on those two things (i only provided two reasons because, haha, i may or may not have lost the post i was using for info) i think we can concur that he had atleast SOME sort of father issues, and not the "oh yeah he's just an annoying goofy fella" kind of father issues

of course, we ALSO have the deal he made, which was brought up briefly in episode 5, and 8

and there i s kind of a funky little debate on who the deal was with, and what it was for, but the two main cantidates are lilith, and roo

and who knows what lilith/roo makes him do, even? ...okay, aside from lilith/roo, who would be the ones making him do things-

i dont know, theres not alot i can say on this matter other than its most likely alastor made a deal with either lilith or roo to save his power or something, and briefly bring up the fact that he probably does have to do some things here and there, and the fact that if it i s lilith he made the deal with, she probably sent him to help out with the hotel, maybe, i dont know

WHEWWWW OKAY THEN lets get in to some of his behaviours that are n o t at ALL good or normal, the way he treats husk and reacts to him 'caring' about his 'friends' wooo yayyyyy

also heres another alastor image so you little grubs(/j) dont get bored at the lack of things to look at woo

lets start with how he treats husk, thats just, thats not nice man dont do that :(

jokes aside though, there HAS to be some reason that he treats him like this, theres no way that its just because he owns his soul- like, unless husk did something reaallyyy bad theres no reason to treat him like that (granted, alastor IS in hell for a reason, and is NOT a normal or good person)

anyway thats it for this section because i really dont have anything and im relying on the wiki and memory alone to get me through this post shush :(

okay lets talk about his reaction to him nearly dying for his 'friends' and actually caring about them

its clear that this man has some sort of issues with caring about people, and there has GOT to be more than one reason why other than "oh no people are gonna think im a softie thats no good :( *has a breakdown musically*" i mean, it COULD be just that one, but i just really dont think it is honestly, i dont really have that diffinitive of a reason, i just really think that something happened that made him n o t want to get attached to people,

and i REALLLYYYY want to know what that reason is in season two

alright, for the last bit of this post, i think we should discuss the fact that he always smiles

we DO know that one of the reasons is that, to him atleast, a smile is a valuable tool, that keeps your friends inspired, and your enemys guessing, and always ensures YOU'RE the one in control

but its HEAVILY implied in this image that there is another reason,

if you observe close enough (not really that close, but hey who has perfect eyesight not me) you can see it looks like his mouth is stitched, and even more so to be literally always smiling so theres a possibility that either lilith or roo is ALSO forcing him to smile

then again it could just be something about him literally not being able to talk about his deal, which is also plausible

...or thats just what he looks like idk im not here to judge his fashion choices

CONGRATULATIONS!! you made it to the end of my stupid post! keep in mind that any and all of this could change at any given point, and i will update it accordingly....if i remember to

i am not using this in any way to condone his actions AT ALL, you shouldent be a cannibal, or a serial killer, or be manipulative (is that the right word???), thats unswag smh, and i am NOT AT ALL a psychologist, or a psychiatrist, once again, i only really know some of these things because my friend rambles about them, and i used to get in to crime and psychology documentaries when i was bored

so i am not at ALL a professional

thanks for reading this shit show of a post

[elixlozgamer]

Im probably gonna get a lot of hate. Im probably gonna get death threats in my ask box (again. Yes Im looking at you "kill the soldiers" anon. Speaking of which, anon will be OFF until this post stops getting notifs. Block me if you don't want to see any other opinions than you own, because I'm allowed to have them.)

Rest of PSA is below the cut. TW for mention of death threats and possible cussing.

But we do NOT need to send death threats, things with smutty themes, etc. Into a celebrities ask box all because they're gonna be on this site.

They're people just as much as we are. If you don't like them, theres a handy-dandy feature called "blocking and moving on". Not writing rude messages. Not saying "Blazing a post is a pvp attack". (Because god forbid an artist use a feature to be seen)

I understand not wanting big corps to make their way on Tumblr. Believe me, I do. However Tumblr's advertising (or at least on mobile) is easilly skippable/you can scroll past or actually look at the ad if its somewhat interesting.

Also, Tumblr sells shoelaces for 19 dollars. That should only be like three dollars, but it shows that it really does need the money. (@indigoartistqueen mentioned that, along with other various things in this article) Such as paying programmers to create new features. Paying artists to create new logos and themes. paying the employees that check out the reports. (which I am rlly sorry for them bc I just so happen to keep finding really rude comments or things shipping an 8 year old with an 1000 year old.)

So, if tumblr got a little more money, then merch will cost less. Features will cost less. You can crab someone for less for goodness sakes. (Speaking if which, if you REALLY hate a celeb that badly, run them off with crabs.) But tumblr, just like any other site and app, NEEDS money to keep it running.

Also, don't you think SOME form of algorithm will be good? Or at least better search results? Because artists do tend to use very different tags. (Like memes, funny, lmao, lol, etc.) All that could be grouped under "Funny" so that people can actually find and search for their content easier.

Not to mention that with the way the tumblr staff are, I highly doubt they're gonna be implementing things that will cause a riot from their supporters, like the algorithm, bc the blogs ARE the algorythm, reblogging stuff they like to spread it out.

But just a better tagging system! i myself have stopped posting art as much because I just DON'T get seen! People just don't like or reblog my work, but if I were to blaze it, I would suddenly have 1,000 notes full of threats and "this is a pvp attack. Everybody block on sight."

Now, getting back to the celebrity thing. So many people have said that they don't want any political opinions to divide this site. Well I'd hate to break it to you, but we have, in some form, a type of political dispute. Usually its over the type of view one should have on a fiction character. How you can interpret them. What headcanons are correct. Which fandoms better. Which characters hotter. I could go on over the disputes! Plus the political side of tumblr! Science side of tumblr! Religous site on tumblr!

It never ends! If you don't like a celebrity, DON'T SEND DEATH THREATS TO THEIR ASK BOX! Some will actually commit it! Instead, BLOCK. THEM. It's easy! Don't pay attention to it! Just block them. If you really don't like them, send a cursed image, like I don't know, Patrick Star in stripper heels! A perfect circle thats slightly off! Do NOT send threats, because they're humans just like you! (Or as a Fairy myself, xenogenders as well)

Point is, quit trying to run celebrities off this site all because you're afraid of contriversal opinions that you don't agree with! Just block them! It's there for a reason! It's not like roblox where you can only block 100 people total!

Use the block feature. Don't fight fire with fire. It will ONLY get worse. You don't see firemen using flamethrowers, do you??? No! Please for the LOVE OF WHOEVER OR WHATEVER YOU BELIEVE IN quit spreading hate! It only makes things worse! You're only making yourself worse! Just because tumblr is an anonymous site does not mean you can do whatever you want... Because guess what? There's other humans right behind that post you just saw! (Unless its a bot ofc, that's a different story for another time)

Respectfully, have a good day. If you don't like my opinion, block me. If you send me a threat, I'll block and report you.

[demadogs]

if byler is confirmed by episode 8/9, then what would you want to have in store for them for season 5? I think it's endgame myself but personally I have no idea what to think about what's gonna happen to them in the last season!

i’ll give you two answers (and then an answer to something you didnt even ask) bc im not sure if by confirmed you mean to the audience or to mike and will.

if they both establish their feelings to each other in volume 2 then i think next season will be them dating in secret but will wants to come out to everyone and mike doesnt. they might get in a fight about it. i think mike has way more internalized homophobia than will ever did and the idea of people knowing really scares him. in the first episode when they reunite again i think they’ll be all cute and happy in private and then will asks “are we telling them this time” and mike clearly gets anxious and will might say something like “you said next time we see each other you’d be ready” and mike denies it or something.

i also think dustin might be on to them and a little side story will be dustin talking to lucas about it and lucas wouldnt believe him at all but dustin totally does. i also hope mike has a wholesome coming out moment with nancy. i just would love to see that. but overall i think next season would be them dating but mikes struggle with being openly himself might make their relationship a little rocky. but will knows its not his fault so it doesnt lead to any huge fight or break up or anything. its just hard that theyre not on the same page with that.

if mike and wills feelings are confirmed to the audience in volume 2 but not to each other then i think next season will be painful mutual pining that neither recognize or act on because theyre both scared the other doesnt feel the same way. i think they might figure it out halfway through the season because if they saved it to the end there wouldnt be much room to show their coming out. honestly i think if this is the case i think people might find out accidentally because 1) i dont want them to just jump right into coming out with just a couple scenes and not express how serious that moment is to them and 2) i dont think mike would be ready to come out immediately after starting to date will.

it would make a lot more sense for them to establish their feelings to each other at the end of this season but im honestly not sure they will because they havent shown that much of mikes feelings. nothing they showed indicated that he doesnt have feelings for him, but what they did show was very subtle and when i have conversations with stranger things fans that love the show but dont follow up with theories or cast interviews as heavily, they all have never even considered mike being gay. most know that will likes mike but they dont suspect mike likes will. and i know thats probably what the duffers were going for but honestly i dont think it was the best move because now i think if they push it all in volume 2 it’ll feel to casual fans like it came out of nowhere. they should have implied it the way they implied nancy and steve getting back together.

though i do think thats what theyre doing based on everything the cast and crew has said. the duffers said finn plays a more emotional mike this season. we havent seen much emotion from mike at all, at least none that i would describe as more emotional than previous seasons, so that means that he’ll be a lot more emotional in volume 2. finn has said multiple times that mike learns a lot about himself and how he sees his relationships with people so i think he does figure out he’s gay and likes will but im not sure about him confessing to will.

from what we’ve seen already it would make more sense for mike to just realize his feelings this season but not admit it to will, but when you consider what that would lead to next season and how they would have to kinda rush their coming out, it makes more sense for them to get together this season. theres pros and cons to each.

i ended up answering lots of questions you didnt even ask but i just wanted to talk about that cuz i dont see a lot of people debating whether the characters will confirm it to each other or if theyll just confirm it to the audience this season. but yeah thats what i think will happen next season with mike and will in either scenario.

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: July 10th

I really let asks get away from me lately. I was super focused on working on that Patreon Moment. With that done I can finally think about doing other things, so here’s a new collection of answers!

Thank you for sending in questions everyone ^^.

For the new Patreon moment, will you be able to reference it in step 4? Or just like a tiny nod to it if you pick certain choices?

There won’t be. I’m sorry if you were hoping for that! The Patreon moment is meant to be entirely optional, it’s not something that gets you extra content in the main game.

Is the new CG artist the main one now? :0 I’ve noticed theres been a difference in the art style recently. Is the old CG artist still going to make art for the game? :0

The original artist still makes CGs for the game sometimes, but he mainly focuses on character sprites.

Are you going to put the NSFW our life moment on a website other than patreon? I would love to get it but I can't use patreon atm.

I don’t know. I'm afraid we can't release the Patreon Moment on a normal game storefront because we can't mix 18+ content with our family friendly game. If there's some other place similar to Patreon where it's not the normal type of full-scale public content releases we'd consider using that, but I’m not sure if there is another site that’s better than Patreon in that regard. I'm sorry.

Out of curiosity, in all of your games so far, which characters in each were the most fun to write? They obviously don't have to be your favorite characters!

Buffalo Seer in AFA, really everyone in XOD/XOBD is pretty equally entertaining to write, The Guide in LoV, and Cove in OL!

idk if you accept "personal" questions, but is there anything you've been watching/ listening to lately

Mostly, I’ve been watching/listening to Authortube videos as of late! It’s people who talk generally about the process of how books become traditionally published and/or share their own experience as they attempt to be published. I don’t have an interest in writing normal text based books, but it’s really interesting to hear about that world. I’m listening to a video about royalties right now as I answer these asks.

Will one of the desserts we get to pick be fudge? That'd be such a cute reference! 

Haha, yeah, it should. Unless I completely blank on it and forget when trying to include the various referential food options.

I don't know if this has been asked previously but what would be the approximate heights for the presets MC can choose from Step 2 ~ 4? Are there any measurement you had in mind? Sorry if I didn't make myself clear kk I've been struggling with my English lately 💀 

I don’t know, ahah. I didn’t have any numbers in mind for that. So it’s whatever you imagine it is!

I noticed a bug with the Patreon moment when it comes to what your character wears. When Jamie and Cove are kissing while my character only had dresses selected, I had both the option to remove the dress or to remove the shirt... Picking one of the options to interact with Cove, after he removed his shirt, it had Jamie remove their shirt followed by ther pants despite only having dresses picked. 

Thank you for reporting ^^

I keep refreshing steam to see when the new doc for xobd will be released. I noticed you haven't posted anything about it in quite some time. Would it be possible to ask about a timeline/potential date? (If it's even this year—) I know you and your team are probably working super hard, I'm just super curious! ~Thank you!~ 

There are more stories done, I just haven’t gotten around to publicly releasing them. Hopefully I will have a chance to spend the time on that sooner rather than later!

hello!! i’m not sure if it’s an update but i’ve just replayed our life and at the end i can’t propose to cove anymore? :(( i’ve actually tried playing twice but the options are not there anymore, did you guys remove the options? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!! thank you and have a good one :) 

I’m afraid things haven’t been changed or removed, so I think you might’ve accidentally picked the wrong things somewhere along the way and locked yourself out of being able to propose by mistake. Sometimes you meant to say you want to get married but instead you mis-click and have it so the MC isn’t thinking about marriage or something. All I can suggest is starting from the beginning of Step 3 and making sure to follow the steps listed in the FAQ. I’m sorry for that.

Did yall remove some of the options for when youre making out with Cove in the charity moment? I could've sworn you could grab his bonkadonk and its not there anymore 

This is the same situation as the above. We didn’t remove things and you’re not wrong that there are sometimes those options. But there are various choices you have to make to get those options and it sounds like you accidentally missed something. If your relationship isn’t long-term, you can’t do it for example.

HI IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY GET THE STEP 3 DLC 

Thank you for getting it!

Is Shiloh super totally straight bc I’m very gay and a huge Shiloh fan, would my man make an exception?😩

Sadly, he is one of our super straight characters. I’m sorry.

Hi, I have a very dumb question. In Step 2 does Cove not wanna share his drink with us at the mall (or rather why he stops drinking it) because it's an indirect kiss? Or is it like ...weird to him to share? Because if I remember right he eats off our spoon in the birthday scene right? 

Yeah, he’s awkward about it because he likes the MC and it feels very personal to share a straw with his crush.

Hi! If you don't mind me asking, who is the artist for OL2? Their style is so pretty! 

Thank you for saying so! This is her Twitter- https://twitter.com/redridingheart

Do Beginnings & Always and Now & Forever exist in the same universe? 

Yep! XOXO Droplets also exists in the same universe. It’s one big GB Patch world, haha.

Do Pran's parents regret the way they raised him? Do they feel ashamed of it?

No. They’re the type of people best cut out because they’re not gonna change. Which is why Pran does go very limited contact when he’s an adult.

Hi! I just wrapped up my second playthrough of Our Life, and I absolutely adore it, but I had a question. I went to the gallery and found I was missing 2 CGS (specifically Step 1-3 and 2-3) and I had no clue where they would've shown up. Which moments are those found in? 

You get it by telling Cove about his dad offering you money to be his friend in Step 1 and Step 2. You can’t get both in one playthrough, since you can only tell Cove the truth once. I’m really glad you liked it!

Hi hi! Please, how tall is Baxter and Derek? Love the game so much and I can't wait to see more! 

I don’t know, aha. I think Baxter was around 5′10 and Derek was like 5′8/5′9, maybe. I really am not one who has specific heights for things in mind.

is adult cove a bottom, top, or switch? 

A switch, though would choose the top if he had to pick.

I was wondering if there is a way to transfer save data? Even if through the game files. I wanted to be able to transfer my save data from my desktop over to my laptop so that I could continue playing right where I left off from but I'm not entirely sure how to go about that. 

If you save the save folder/persistent data of the game from your desktop and put it into the game folder on your other device, that could work.

Hi! Is it possible for us to know the date when our life: now and forever comes out on steam? Sorry if you've mentioned it before but I haven't seen it and I'm looking foward to that happening and just wanted to know :) 

It’s gonna be a long time, I’m afraid. There’s no estimate right now.

I started playing Our Life with my sister a while ago, and I think you guys should know that we discovered your secret. >:)

L from death note and Cove are clearly the same person, and this whole game is just an origin story!!

I’ve never seen that show so I’m sorry to say I don’t understand the connection/reference you’re trying to make. I’m pretty out of the loop when it comes to media. I don’t watch movies or TV.

Will OL2 have options for disabled MCs?

I understand if it's too complicated, just curious

Unfortunately, it’s not really something we have a plan for. We couldn’t finish the game if we tried to include every disability and have it be meaningful. It’d just be too much content to create. But if we decide to only include a few, how would we choose which disabilities get to be represented and which are left out? I don’t know. It’ll probably have to be something we don’t include as an option again, sadly. I’m sorry.

playing our life > anything else 

Haha, I’m glad you’re enjoying it.

Honestly, I would like to thank Our Life for helping me come to terms with my sexuality. Before, I never would've actually thought that it was possible to like boys romantically and still be asexual. Almost all of the BL visual novels I've read had unskippable sexual content in them and it honestly just didn't click with what I feel. I'm glad I found Our Life. I love the game, the developers, and this fandom so much. Now, I can safely come out as homoromantic AND asexual (at least anonymously here anyway; my parents are still huge homophobes 😂). 

Aw, it’s great to hear you felt comfortable being yourself in the game! That’s wonderful. I’m really sorry about your parents, though.

Will the demo for OL2 be on android? Really not sure if I could wait any longer than I have to aha 

Yeah, it’ll be available for Android once we eventually release a demo!

Do all these reveals perhaps mean development is progressing ahead of schedule? Please let that be the case I'm already obsessed with Qiu 

No, sorry, aha. Art comes along much faster than script/programming-work for us. It’s gonna be a long time before the game is a finished thing you can actually play. But at least we can look at the beautiful images.

Hey! First of all I wanna say I reallllllyyyyy loooovvveeee Our Life and XOXO Droplets! I have over 300 hours of playtime on Our Life… Anyways, I was just wondering, are the Derek and Baxter DLCs going to come out at the same time? If not, which one do you plan to release first? :3 

They will come out separately and Derek will be first! Glad you like the game.

I keep replaying Our Life to get every possible iteration and I am loving it <3 I was wondering if Cove gets locked out of his confession because MC was talking to Lee, would it be possible to confess to him in step 4? 

Yeah, you can avoid the confession in Step 3 and then get it in Step 4.

Hi, my Cove wears bracelets through step 2 and 3 but I still don't get an option to give him a bracelet? I didn't even know that was possible until I seen someone else ask about it lol 

Hm, did you use the Cove creator? Maybe there’s a bug where using the creator to add bracelets doesn’t fulfill the requirement to give Cove a bracelet in Step 3.

Wait, I'm dense, when does Baxter appear in step 2? Is it from big park firework? I feel so bad since i really love Baxter and waiting to buy his dlc. 

It’s in the Soiree Moment. You have to be just friends with Cove, indifferent, or crushing but not ask Cove to the dance at all. Then while there you can find someone new to dance with. But if you bring Cove to the dance while crushing, the MC won’t wanna dance with anyone else so you can’t get the scene.

In step 2 when we go to the soiree I made my mc go alone and baxter chooses the mc to dance, i'm curious, why did he pick the mc? sorry if this has been asked before! 

Because the MC looked to be around his age, seemed to also be searching for a partner, and had nice legs. A perfect option for him.

I read some of the FAQs, and I saw that we could tell Baxter about the condo that he rented there was previously the mean old grandparents. how do we get the mc to tell him that? 

It happens in the DLC Moment “Late Shift”. If you don’t have a job you instead get a longer scene with Baxter.

I don’t know if you’ve addressed this or not, but are you planning on paying voice actors for our life: now and forever? 

Yeah, we pay our VAs in all our projects.

hey can i ask how you did the moments thing in ol? im trying to get into making visual novels and while im VERY sure its out of my comfort zone and all that atm i kinda wanna know just for the future, bc im p sure it would work well for something i wanna do :O but its also fine if you cant say for other reasons :> 

I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean. Are you asking how we programmed the screen or something script related? Adding Moments like that is pretty straightforward, though. You just have buttons that open to different labels and then the scripts are essentially individual short stories/vignettes. Good luck with your VN!

Since Autumn becomes gender fluid later in the game, will there be a character who remains as he/him to romance in game? 

OL1 has the he/him LIs, OL2 is all about other genders.

I don't want to impose on your creative plans, but a parrot could possibly make a good pet in an OL-type game? They're pretty long-lived and likely to still be thriving by the end even if the MC got them back in step 1. 

I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid it’s not likely going to happen. I understand there are technically some animals that could theoretically live long enough to last the whole game that or we could have the MC only get a pet after some years have already passed. But the many things that would have to be considered/accommodated for makes it just something we probably can’t manage adding. I’m sorry.

As time passes will we be able to see Qiu and Tamarack's other stage arts as well?

They are both so cute i can't wait to be friends with them!

Yeah, we’ll show content from other Steps in the future. It’ll be a little while from now, though.

Can you date Cove and still have your family comfort you in the car?

You can’t get Cove’s Step 3 confession scene if you have the family comfort you in the car. But that’s not the only way to date him. You can get together with him earlier in the game or later on in Step 4.

Is Mc always going to be the one walking down the aisle or could Cove do it? Also could you choose to have one of your moms walk you? 

No. Cove wouldn’t want to walk down the aisle like that and the MC automatically respects that. And the MC also gets to have their preferences respected, so it’s up to you whether they want to do an aisle walk or not. You also can pick who, if anyone, walks with you.

Once step 4 is out, will you be able to go the whole game on crush/love without either of you confessing? 

Yes, as long as you tell the game you don’t want to progress the relationship. Even in Step 4 it won’t force you to officially get together.

Howdy, so in Step 4, there will be any Romance with Derek that is not part of any dlc? 

He’s only a friend unless you get his romance story.

Will the step 4 in OL2 be one big step or are you considering moments? 

Step 4 is just an epilogue in both games.

hi kind of a weird question but!! we know tht cliff doesn't start dating again but. wht abt flings? like does he ever do 1 night stands or anything? thank u!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Nope. Cliff has a very small interest in sex. If he’s not in a real relationship with a partner he’s crazy about it simply isn’t something he feels a need for, so one night stands wouldn’t even cross his mind.

sorry if you've already answered this, but i was wondering if there were plans for there to be bonus love interests in OL2 like how we have derek and baxter in OL1.

Maybe! There are side characters who could be given romance stories, but whether or not it will happen depends on funding and how long everything else takes to finish.

I don't know if i'm allowed to ask about ol2 here yet, if not u can ignore this or answer it later. My question is can you date one of them and be good friends with the other? I don't want to be strangers with the other bcs i love them both a lot :<

Yes you can!

what patreon level do i have to be to unlock the nsfw moment? im on the $5 one right now, will that give me access to the moment, or just access to the moment progress? 

That’ll give you access! Tier 2 and anything higher allows the player to download it.

[nihiltism]

okay heres my vaguely compiled list of reasons why I am almost positive kazuaki nanaki from hatoful boyfriend is autistic, made by an autistic who did have to close holiday star and take a nap after reading his backstory because that was how much psychic damage getting called out by a dating simulator about birds caused me.

obligatory hatoful boyfriend holiday star spoilers below

1: the torture

okay but actually. not in any particular order.

1: its pretty innocuous but canon does make clear that he has food aversions and it doesnt do that as much for other birds so I'm choosing to take that for more than just "haha grown man doesnt eat his vegetables"

2: theres a kickstarter description for his plush I think which says smth along the lines of "hes a delicate crybaby but he has the power of concentration when it comes to his interests" which sounds like the tism to me how about you

3: do I need to cite sources to make a point abt him getting RSD or can I just say it and we all just nod because we all know its true. I cant just gesture at literally all of his dialogue can i. moving on

4: on the same line did you know that recognition responsive euphoria is also a thing apparently because I didnt. u ever get empathized with once and fall head over heels instantly

5: general behavior often seen as childish + tendency to regress after trauma. the king could very well be him regressing after trauma. yeah.

6: a lot of kazuaki-kun's book from what I gather as well as his flashback in holistar is just the fun fun woes of executive dysfunction. probably other woes too but that is the one I relate to the most and the one I can remember the name for. anyway

7: again another (just gestures vaguely at the character) one but depression and anxiety often come along with the tism so theres another corroboration right there

8 and the one that really resonated with me the most which is also his whole point:

🎉 the existential dread of being unable to function "correctly" if at all in a societal structure where you either function or you die and every facet was designed against you specifically and there is no escape 🎉

wooooooo

anyway theres also some other bits and pieces that arent Totally autistic coding in and of themselves but did hit too close to me as an autistic person so I'm gonna list those here too because "I'm autistic and this happened to me" should be some sort of coding as well right

- tendency to get over-attached to people

- cries as a default emotional response even when it is not specifically appropriate

- being fucked over hilariously by gifted kid complex as soon as college rolls around

- not having the energy/literally just never learning how to take care of himself

- not being able to actually do anything so either sleeping thru the entire day or staying up until 5 am with no inbetween

- and my favorite one! a love for life that is obscured so hard by a hatred for capitalism that he literally didnt even know he had it until he was dying

well that got depressing

also on the "im autistic and this happened to me" is that I really like fuzzy clothes if I had eldritch dream powers I would absolutely make myself a fluffy king cape to hide in :)

in conclusion I hope that theres a bit in mirror where kazuaki has a nice nap in the grass in the sun because that's what I do when the existentialism gets heavy and it wards it off a bit for at least like half a week. that's not an autism thing that's just a me thing but he should get a little a grass. thank u for reading

[starrystvdy]

Yooo, next year I'm gonna be a senior, so I was wondering if you have any tips or an experience on how you chose your career/ how to know if physics study will suit you. Love u, thanks!

i’m probably not the best person to answer this - i chose physics for a whole bunch of unusual reasons, i probably won’t go into a career in it and i’m not sure what its like in other countries, but i can tell you about what physics degrees are like in the uk.

first of all, its SO MUCH work. i thought hey a degree’s a degree, especially in the same institution, as long as you’re not a medic or something, different subjects must require a somewhat similar amount of work right? no T-T for physics i have never ending labs and tutorials and problem sheets on top of lectures, meanwhile for comp sci i have like a few lectures, practicals here and there and exams i can totally wing. its feels like more of an achievement in the end though, just be prepared for the stab of pain when you’re talking to someone and they say they have 8 hours of contact time a week •-•

aside from that, keep in mind that its a lot of maths. its all maths. a lot of people will say you have to be really good at it but thats not true, you just have to be happy to spend a lot of time on it. though if you find maths easy then physics will be a blast and theres nothing to worry about. (here at least) its definitely more about problem solving and application than learning concepts from a textbook, so if you enjoy that physics is a good choice.

anyway good luck with everything!! don’t stress too much about careers, you’ll end up where you’re meant to be somehow :) 

[getallemeralds]

Explorers of Arvus: uhhhh / 3.23.21

today's notes are different from usual bc. well. you'll see

LAST TIME ON EXPLORERS OF ARVUS i broke my sleep schedule and am barely existing so this is fine. we went back to camp vengeance an uhhhhhhhhhhhh we are now going to fuck off into the forest to die or prove a very important point

oh god we forgot to level up

[mgd voice] BOOSTING NYX TO MAXIMUM LEVEL

im so fuckin tired. what on earth am i doing. how do i level again

k is not here this time but instead we've got mae+nii bonking their heads together to simulate 2 braincells and so far it is not working. i might just have to like fuckin, drop out n zzz partway thru or somethin. would be fun to see how chaotic michael makes charlie in my absensce

oh wait i can do d&dbeyond i think. how do i work this again. will i ever remember i have shield

what level am i. level 6? pog. oh shit i think i have a new thing

. new spell

. 3 total 3rd level spell slots

. bend luck! i can now screw people over on purpose (and will probably use my sorcery points FINALLY)

michael is leveling charlie up bc my brain is apple sos

ASDXFKLJFH I FEEL CALLED OUT zec rb'd my most recent art of MaX with "all i know about xem is that leo likes xem a lot that's the extent of my knowledge" THANK U FOR SUPPORTIN ME ANYWAY

there will be less blaseball distractions than last time bc blaseball is now on siesta. however i will still have MaX brainrot in the background bc i was drawing xem

wyatt mason my beloved

OKAY I GOTTA MUTE THE TACO STAND FOR THE ENTIRETY OF D&D i cannot and will not get distracted. we can do this. we

nintendo wii

we havent even started yet and im already incoherent

ok i have made a decision and that decision is that i do not have the brainpower to play. however i do have the brianpower to take notes hopefully! so ill just like. vibe. this will be a first

oh man im gonan pick up Blink. charlie is gonna be a fucking menace to herself and others

oh my god its not concentration so charlie may continue teleporting while unconscious. thorne is going to hate this

[charlie gets her soul eaten by a ring] [charlie singing dragonston din tei at halvkWAIT JORB HAS A PRIZE

jorb got a thing! an evil genius thing! figure man. fugrine. figuring. help

GREEN HAS DIAGNOSED ME AS TIGREX MONSTERHUNTER i love this

my notes are a disaster. this is so sucks

serotonin is stored in the wiggly zoomy jorb camera

jorb: his pinky is the size of the rest of his fingers

leo: he has a disease

jorb: he has a disease.

jorb: that disease is male pattern baldness

leo: [reduced to tearful giggling for mysterious reasons]

LAST TIME, ON EXPLORERS OF ARVUS: we've returned to camp vengeance! taure is still unconscious, which is not very great. camp vengeance is doin better tho!

michael, as part of the recap: ingrid is getting railed by her new girlfriend,

first dice roll of the day is michael rolled a 1. good start

OH THORNE IS AN ARTIFICER NOW thorne took a level in artificer!

"...it's like figuring out the right mathematical equation to summon a gun."

group is gonna go check out the statue that we passed by now that we're not WHAT DO YOU MEAN PONK AND GEORGE CANONICALLY HAVE IBS thats it im not looking at 772 anymore

im doing a bad job of paying attention but at least im Present

SIERON LEARNED FLY AND USED IT ON CHARLIE

michael: what do you want to do with your new flying powers?

leo: how many problems can i cause in 10 minutes

guard 1: ...why is the halfling flying?

guard 2: [rolls a 3 on intelligence] i think they can just do that

groundhogs, the real scourge of the campaign

silje and sieron are gonna hunt a big elk. they got distracted and sieron is putting grass on silje's head. i think

WAIT WE'RE ON WATCH NOW FUCK

we have discovered kali's tragic backstory whoops

update i am. too sleepy for this. good nigh everyone

[ and then leo went and somewhat took a nap! solar, normally playing thorne, started playing charlie in my stead. @jorbs-palace, local hero, started taking shitpost notes in my stead. ]

jorb's ghostwritten notes for leo:

help solar is immediately doing a cursed voice for charlie. charlie can do so many crimes

congratulations, charlie is now temporarily immortal!

dwarves can hit things with their beard

kali wants to know if she's legally allowed to bail

she'd feel really bad if she had to loot our corpses for payment if we died.

we have entered the Tree Zone

one of the corpses is now a flamingo (has one leg)

silje has decided to stab the ground. take that, dirt

kali was large size for a second there but then she remembered to not be a giant

"you accidentally deleted my cat?!"

silje has learned naruto cloning jutsu

be gone, thot

oh boy, making an int check to look at a statue! 11! silje is dumb apparently.

hmm. the statue has divination magic. it's also affecting silje.

SILJE LEARNED A 6TH LEVEL SPELL? its only single use but still

you solved my statue riddllllleeeee

thorne forgot to have eyes

its a shame mac and cheese doesnt exist in the d&d universe

wizards are just math criminals (the criminal part is setting people on fire)

sieron crit fails a check but it was still a 9 because of having +8

thorne is looking for what's weird!

uh oh music got scary, never a good sign

hmm. those leaves over there weren't dead a moment ago.

UNDEAD TROLL TIME! rolling initiative

"it's ok, im a wizard, it's my duty to be correct." "wow! waow!"

woooah here he comes

IT JUST DID HALF SIERON'S HEALTH AS A PASSIVE END OF TURN EFFECT?

thorne backed up and cast eldri- oh, ray of enfeeblement. character development continues

charlie is going to just blink out of existence for a minute.

big chungus has grabbed silje and sieron. BIG CHUNGUS HAS THROWN SILJE AND SIERON.

sieron is using hit and run tactics! isn't good at his extra attack yet though

silje is activating bid bid blood blood blood

thorne uses beam of skipping your leg day. troll's legs are now skipped.

michael is trying to determine what a 'clavicle' is

"does that mean the star trek kind, or the bdsm kind?"

charlie wants to cast magic missile.

charlie has vanished back into the ethereal plane mid-taunt

silje has decided to not get bitten today

silje may or may not have stats.

oh, right, trolls are weak to fire! and also we forgot to upgrade sieron's firebolt. so it actually hurts now!

silje is full of knives and blades and does 31 damage in one turn!

charlie shouts words of encouragement from the ethereal plane. a nearby ghost vibes with this.

🎉 eldritch blast 🎉

kali remembered she hates the sun

silje is enthuasiatic about charlie saying "get him cat boy!"

charlie contemplating using fireball to nuke the troll and also the entire stonehenge

charlie has decided to use magic missile instead, probably for the best

the troll bit at charlie SO POORLY it broke some of its teeth on the ground

charlie is too small to hit

accidentally rolled advantage on a firebolt, so got to learn it WOULD have done 29 damage with a crit but instead it missed because it was not actually with advantage

silje has just sliced open its entire back and made a spray of frozen blood! radical. big boy is down!

we have burned the body because we are not stupid. well, we ARE stupid, but not stupid in the way of leaving a body full of necrotic magic around

[dr coomer voice] i think it's good that he died!

we're also doing a funeral pyre for the other corpses that were around. just to be sure.

our loot is: the satisfaction of a job well done

thorne is cosplaying as charlie

charlie has located the direction troll came from! she found the 'the way to sweet loot' sign

thorne is apparently better at survival checks than our hired guide? wack

we found a viking house! it has: mead, a shield, gravestones,

found a gold coin in the mead! maybe it was thirsty

oh theres a LOT Of coins in there actually. 60 gold and 120 silver!

have successfully pointed out a hole in the DM's logic :)

there was a raven! it cawed and left. ok bye buddy

and that's where we leave it! heading back to camp vengeance next time.

someone rated this session a 7.2 out of 10, which is very specific

good night mr coconut

[actuallyrandomperson]

My thoughts on the Sanders Sides Spotify playlists- Roman Edition!

Note: this is Purely me saying whether or not I like the songs, not theorising about any deeper meanings. I’ve done them all, so just click on the names to see my reactions to the others: Virgil, Patton, Logan, Janus

Impressions from looking through the playlist: so This One I can confidently say I know more of the songs from. At least, from the titles I do. It helps that I probably have the most personal overlap of music taste with Roman, judging by the titles I recognise sjdksk

1: ‘A Gay Disney Prince’, by Thomas Sanders, Jon Cozart. I have never heard of this song ever before, and don’t have any clue who the singers are. This song totally wasn’t on my ten hour playlist up until the moment I was playing said playlist in the kitchen while baking with my mother and it came up and I felt awkward by the innuendos at the start. And I absolutely hated it, can’t believe it was in this playlist at all. I do not know it word for word at all, and me mentioning in my schools lgbt+ club when it was released definitely didn’t result in a large majority of us bonding over our shared love of Thomas Sanders.

2: ‘Wonderboy’, by Tenacious D. I have mixed feelings on this song? Some part of me really liked it, but another really didn’t. I don’t know. I still added it to the 32 hour playlist though, as I figure I can remove it at some point in the future if that opinion eventually wins out. It was entertaining, at least!

3: ‘Disney Princess’, by Lewberger. Despite my enduring love for Keith and the rest of The Try Guys, I haven’t actually listened to that much Lewberger. This is obviously a fault that I will be remedying as soon as possible, as this song was hysterical. Obviously made it onto the 32 hour playlist, and also theres a tiny part of me getting excited over some of my faves interacting in a vague way even though I know that it’s not that unusual dhxkkdks

4: ‘Broadway, Here I Come!’, by the SMASH cast. I’ve never seen SMASH, but I liked this song! I like showtunes and songs from musicals a lot of the time, but I also only tend to listen to them when I’ve actually seen whatever they’re from, and I’m a poor 17 year old who can’t sing or act and can only slightly dance, so there’s not as many as there otherwise would be in my 32 hour playlist. This is on there now though!

5: ‘Hallelujah’, by Oh Wonder. I liked this! I expect I’ll be saying that a lot in this playlist ndjfjskdkd. I actually added it to my ten hour playlist!! Which will mean nothing to you if you haven’t read my other reactions so I recommend u go do that!! At least Patton’s/Virgil’s as they’re the ones completed at the time of writing this! Lmao

6: ‘Holding Out for a Hero’, by Bonnie Tyler. Have to say, as a gen z who grew up more with Shrek than Footloose, hearing the original version of this song was wild. I’ve heard it before, obviously, but I just. Hear this song in the fairy godmothers voice when I imagine it. This was added to the 32 hour playlist though!!

7: ‘If I Dare’, by Sara Bareilles. I’ve never seen Battle of the Sexes (unsurprisingly; I don’t watch many movies jdjdkkskw) but this song was cool! I wouldn’t purposefully seek it out in the future, but I liked it enough to put it on the 32 hour playlist so it’ll come around every now and again.

8: ‘Go the Distance’, by Roger Bart. This song highlighted the big, gaping hole in my 32 hour playlist which is the lack of music from Hercules. It’s literally my favourite Disney Renaissance film, why the fuck was the soundtrack not already in the 32 hour playlist??? It is now, don’t worry. Also, at the end of these I’m gonna be rechecking the length of both the 32 hour playlist and the 11 hour one and giving an updated total as I’ve only added 1 song so far to the 32 hour long on that wasn’t prompted by one of the songs in these playlists, and I doubt I’ll add any more, and adding all of the Hercules soundtrack + bonus tracks added another whole hour in of itself. There’s a r e a s o n this playlist has gotten so long shfjdjskxm

9: ‘Flamboyant’, by Dorian Electra. This is the first song of this playlist that I haven’t really liked, even including wonderboy. It didn’t make it onto either playlist, but I probably wouldn’t skip it if it comes up on a playlist in the future.

10: ‘Jumpstarted’, by Jukebox the Ghost. This was a bop! I often seem to like songs that jump all over the place a lil bit (see: my love of Tiny Love by MIKA and my newfound love of Be Calm by Fun.), and this one did just that! It made it to the 32 hour playlist 😄

11: ‘Brave New Girl’, Britney Spears. I mean. It’s Britney Spears. Do I need to say anything more? It’s been added to the 32 hour playlist.

12: ‘Every Boy’, by Miss Benny. If I tell y’all that ‘Boys will be Boys’ and ‘Little Game’ were the first two songs I ever added to the 32 hour playlist, I think you’ll know my feelings on this song. It’s the second first one that was already on said 32 hour playlist out of all the songs so far, and the only reason it’s not on the 10 hour one is I didn’t deem it ‘normal people music’ enough (which is the main criteria for said playlist as I play it around my fam)

13: ‘Primadonna’, by MARINA. This was a bop! I added it to the 32 hour playlist, but I don’t expect myself to specifically seek it out in the future. I did bop around to it a lil bit while lying down tho!!

14: ‘King’, by Years and Years. I didn’t recognise this song at first, but it hit the singing and I was like ‘oh!!’. It got added to the 32 hour playlist!! It’s a Bop!!!

15: ‘Cheap Queen’, by King Princess. The title and artist combination gave me a chuckle, and although I wasn’t foully sold on the song when it first started, I liked it enough by the end to add it to the 32 hour playlist. I feel like it’ll grow on me more as I hear it again in the future.

16: ‘Humility (feat. George Benson)’, by Gorillaz. My best friend was obsessed with Gorillaz when we first met, so I’ve heard a lot of their music (although this song wasn’t out back then). I liked it, and added it to the 32 hour playlist, but I probably wouldn’t seek it out specifically as I only slightly vibe with Gorillaz music

17: ‘Ain’t Got It Like That’, by Earl St Claire, PJ. I liked this, but not enough to add it to the 32 hour playlist. It was good, and I wouldn’t skip it in the future if it came up in a playlist, it just wasn’t my jam.

18: ‘Dreamer’, by LaPeer. I liked this as soon as it started, and that initial instinct proved correct! I added it to b o t h the 32 hour playlist and the ten hour one!!! I know!! It made me feel kinda soft and also the message in it is Important

19: ‘Paving the Runway (You’re Gonna Fly)’, by JJ Heller. This is another one I sensed myself liking as soon as it started, and I once again had good instincts! This one was even softer, but I liked it slightly less so it’s only on the 32 hour playlist.

20: ‘GO.’, by Keith Tutt II. This song immediately intrigued me, partially because I wasn’t initially even fully sure if it had started or if I was hearing things. I liked it, but wouldn’t specifically seek it out. It did make it into the 32 hour playlist though!!

Final Thoughts: What a shock, I liked the playlist filled with musicals and pop the most (so far)!! It’s a miracle!! It’s almost like I tend to like musicals and pop!! But yeah, I wasn’t surprised that most of this playlist fit into my music tastes. My favourite new song would probably be Dreamer, followed by Hallelujah. 18/20 got added (technically 16/20 as two were already there but u get me) to the 32 hour playlist and 2 to the 10 hour one.

@thatsthat24

[glasyasbutch]

Time! Line! Asks! Roona: 2! Craving: 5! I make you be nice to Craving asmr!!! Ezra: 7! Gildy: 14! Tov: 8! Did I just go through your active characters page! Yes!!!! Go nuts king!!!

hee hee hoo hoo!!!!!!!!!! thank u rebekah!!!! (also thanks for the reminder to add gent and take off gildy from my active characters nnsfsdkl)

2. the timeline in which they never met who would become the most influential or important person in their life, or that person was taken from them before they were capable of forming memories.

Now this is an interesting one for roona, because they genuinely don’t have a single person in their life that i consider to be hugely influential. like, i guess at the moment you could say sepia man, for trapping her in black and white hell, or vinny, for talking her into taking that job.

but honestly, roona doesn’t form long-term attachments, and that’s not a sad thing for her! she enjoys the constant change, and she has plenty of good memories and people she considers friends, but she just doesn’t hang around any of them long enough to experience a lot of change that wouldn’t have otherwise occurred had she not been trying with that exact purpose.

so, in some ways, this timeline is pretty much identical to the one they’re in now. they float around from place to place without much regard for what they’re going to and what they’re leaving behind outside of following the trail of interest they’re currently on.

in other ways, removing any one person from their life would disrupt the timeline just as much as anyone else, because every single place she’s been and person she’s met has tweaked her path in life just a little bit. roona functions like a domino snake, falling moment to moment to moment and not able to see ahead because theres the thing thats happening right now in the way, but if you turn one domino even a little, you might miss the next one entirely and stop the trail right then, or skip to another area. so picking any random person to remove from her life very well could mean that alternate universe roona is still on the material plane, across the country from where they and vinny last were, a college of whispers bard multiclassed with rogue posing as a cleric just to get better gossip.

roona lives her life unchanged, yet utterly changed, and always random.

5. the timeline in which they continue on from the current point in their life to the best happy ending within their reach, where nothing that has happened so far is negated, but the happy things start piling up

craving’s backed herself so far into a corner that there’s no happy ending for her without some strife first. so we’ll get that out of the way.

the party finds out who her patron is. maybe judhas lets it slip, maybe she gets drunk again and spills it to val in a heart to heart about their devil cult trauma, maybe the morning lord sends manic and message and she can’t bear to lie to him when he’s sitting right next to her and asking so sincerely what she did to try and let him walk the high road.

and she cries. she cries, and she screams, and she pushes people away, and she retreats beneath her own skin and tries to hide because she knows this is her fault but she cannot admit she fucked up because she has to believe in what she’s doing if she’s going to see it through.

but someone snaps her out of it. someone gives her an exit. someone (or several someones) vow to stand by her side without judgement and get her out of this mess no matter the cost because they don’t believe that she’s as hopelessly damned as the rest of the world.

they break out of barovia first and foremost. they stab that vampire bitch right through the heart.

she gets to tell judhas to fuck the hell off, and god does it feel good.

then, she discovers the location of sirris’ true soul, that it is not in hell, and she has no reason to have her pact anymore, and she finds a way to break it, even against the queen of loopholes.

she runs into stella again, a free woman, and its been so damn long since they saw each other. they both had their trauma turned on them to manipulate them into subversion and they both are tearing that control apart from the inside. so they clean each others wounds and kiss each other’s bruises and craving finally says “i love you” because god damn it, she does, and she knows stella already knew, but her star deserves to hear it.

manic has a happy ending too, because he and craving are too close for her to have one without him. he sticks with the morninglord, i think. this god seems good for him, even if he won’t really be your typical preacher-type paladin. he probably finds love again in val. if not romance, at the very least family. at least one of her and manic gets a cat again.

craving lives her life supported, wanted, and free.

7. the timeline in which they never experience the loss that taught them something important

this is actually pretty similar to #1 that morgan gave me for him (timeline for ideal life) but i’ll give a quick thing.

the loss was cate’s death, and it taught him that the world is ultimately uncontrollable, even by the gods. at first it made him angry, that he was lied to, and he didn’t want to trust in anyone for fear that he’d be let down. he took five years to start calming down, and then it began to transfer into making him overly kind, because if all he can control in this world is himself, he wants that part to be as welcoming as possible.

so, in a world where cate doesn’t die, he never becomes disillusioned and reillusioned with the idea of devotion. he simply grows in his trust of tamara. his power increases, he becomes a staple of the temple, he lives a happy life inside its battered walls.

i would posit that he might actually be less compassionate in this timeline. not that he’s mean, he’s a very dedicated paladin of a mercy goddess. but, ultimately, he believes that mercy is a given in the world. he believes in tamara’s ability to force it to occur, and that he is simply a conduit. so he makes less effort to cultivate it himself. kindness is no longer a conscious choice that he has to make, and perhaps, that means it falls slightly more to the wayside.

ezra lives his life secure, confident, and devout.

14. the timeline in which they take a chance they didn’t in canon

i’m gonna do a real throwback here, to gildy’s first campaign that lasted ... less than 10 sessions. I think it was a total of like 6. 

in our second session, we met this old man who lived in the middle of nowhere and everyone thought he was super weird because he would go out in the mornings and sweep dust off his lawn and carry it inside. gildy asked him what he was doing and he revealed that this was actually ash, floating over on the wind from a near-ish-by volcano with a connection to the fire plane. he mixed the ash in with clay to create enchanted pottery.

now, playing an elderly 3d artist, i really wanted to flirt with this other elderly 3d artist, but the dm said no because we’d never come back to this town. but, in the timeline where gildy couldve done whatever the fuck she wanted because she wasn’t constricted by a meta-plot, she would’ve tried really hard to get to know this guy!

she would’ve asked to learn some pottery, her hands still work just fine even though her knees don’t always. she’s used to shaping metal, which fights back. she’d love to learn to shape clay, which almost moves before you do. (she might have tried to do the ghost pottery scene with this dude. she knows what’s up). 

there was a nice smithy in town too, made all kinds of weapons and armor. she would’ve taken up apprenticeship with them and hopefully become one of their artisans. and i think she would’ve had a wonderful time there! a new city, with new people, a new love of her life, all the creation she could ask for at her fingertips, a life that hasn’t grown stagnant even after 270 years. there’s also, if i remember right, a mountain nearby. she does get a little homesick from time to time, the view helps. 

gildy lives her life reimagined, shared, and satisfied.

8. the timeline in which they gain everything they want, except for the thing they wanted most

i think this is actually the timeline he’s in right now!!!!!! he wants more than anything to go back home and be forgiven. i don’t think that’ll happen. even if he does reconcile with rax eventually, he’ll have been gone too long for the clan to feel like home in the same way, and i don’t think either rax or him will ever be able to forget what happened, just build a new relationship around it.

but, he has friends now, which he never thought he would. and a house. with a business under it! what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he’s doing good for the city. he’s part of an order dedicated to righteousness and law. he’s an upstanding citizen!

and. of course. he has savra. he has the potential for unconditional love, for family, for future, everything he thought he’d get back from rax one day, but probably won’t. he’ll fall in love with her before he even knows it, (he’s already started), and when he finally realizes, he’ll feel more okay with it than he ever thought he would be, because she knows what its like to feel shame and she knows how to grow past it. 

he’ll be her good man, and a good father eventually, and he won’t even need to go back home anymore (even though he’ll want to, he’ll always feel a bit of guilt that the half-dragon babies only know their human grandparents, and he’ll miss the summer festival food because you just can’t get the right spices in waterdeep even if he and savra try to cook the meals themselves, and he’ll miss the way his brother punches his arm when he laughs because savra never does that, and -). but he’ll have a home in ways he never thought a home could be, but he likes them, and he’s happy, truly, even with the shadows that still curl around the corner of his heart. 

tov lives his life long, useful, and good.

[where-is-my-mind-tho]

Guys I actually  kinda enjoyed The Rise of Skywalker

mini review/first impresions, spoilers will be highlited ;)

although my expectations were kinda low after ep. 8... I’m not gonna say TLJ was total garbage but for me certainly worst of this new trilogy. Compared to ep. 7 which I really liked. TLJ kills alot of new ideas from the previous movie and  has really weird plot and out of all these new movies feels the least like a Star Wars movie... 

I might actually write a little something about ep 7 - 9 later (like what was awesome and what I liked...) bcs when I see all the hate this new trilogy is getting it breaks my heart... I get it that It’s totally different from what we expected as fans but every movie has something epic and I really don’t wanna trash on Star Wars... bcs It’s well Star Wars and I used to love it soo much as a kid. and I still do

so back to ep. IX

I went to premier on 18th and I have to say there were like 3 girls + 1 man dressed as a Jedi :D (not that thats important) lmao and the cinema was like 75% full :D I expected more ppl tbh. But that probably depends on where u live... luckily the cinema aired the version with EN + subtitles first and I was super happy about that.

I gotta admit that I briefly read through the leaks on reddit (yes they are true) so I kinda expected the ending but I still wanted to see for myself and I was not entirely disappointed and there were bunch of scenes that blew my mind. The movie Is filled with so much action .... It would be enough for two movies and It was hell of a ride. All the scenes with Leia look awesome except for one (1) you gonna know when u see... they must have used CGI for that but It’s not a complete disaster.... As usual the trio is absolutely gorgeous... you gonna get more Rey-Poe interactions which are mostly fights but fun to watch. Sadly Finn has almost no development whatsoever and that’s a shame he was very interesting new addition to SW universe.

the saber battles are epic and probably one of my most favorite thing in TROS. also there’s bunch of new worlds and also red troopers... who are kinda just there. 

! spoilers ahead !

now we all know for some time that Palpatine is back but I did not expect him to be shown so early in the movie. It basically opens with scene with Kylo going to Sheev who tells him to kill Rey. IMHO kinda rushed start. Also the revelation that Rey is Palpatine felt kinda funny :D and the story of her parents was NOT what I had expected but thats not a bad thing... Better than what Kylo said about them in ep.8. And now Im gettting to the problem of this movie.

 Ep 7. was great. It introduced new characters and kickstarted the trilogy but then we have ep. 8 which totaly trashed and ruined the direction which was set in TFA and now JJ tried to tie it togheter and in feels so rushed and messy like Disney did not plan this entirely. I had a feeling that they put Palpatine there only bcs Snoke was killed so unexpectedly and they did not have the BIG BAD. Although the whole move is filled with nostalgia trust me when the movie ends you don’t have the feeling of closure. It does not conclude the 9 movie saga... It barely felt like an ending for this trilogy. 

Now to some positive stuff

Adam Driver and his acting is the best thing that could happen to Star Wars. This person has an incredible emotional range. Those who watch his work will agree with me. I’m forever thankful for Disney and JJ for casting him, making him well known and gave him the opportunity to show some raw emotions on screen. He deserves all the awards in the world. 

That being said I can’t shake the feeling that we were robed. His portrayal of Ben Solo is absolutely incredible even though he almost does not speak and It’s a great shame that we won’t be able to see this character more. When Ben appears on Exegol it’s a totally different person even the style of his walk changes. I can’t even imagine how awesome it would be if Kylo turned at the end of ep 8... the whole RISE of Skywalker could have been filled with sarcastic sassy remarks aka Han and Leia style... NOT to mention Ben’s super hot outfit which contains baggy tshirt and black pants... yes that’s it... hottest character and outfit since Loki and his leather armor in 2012 Avengers.... 

I mean look at him....

And than we have the final scene with him and Rey... Ikd what to say about that I’m still processing that smile™. I should say I was never a true Reylo bcs I had the feeling it would be a relationship based on manipulation an abuse BUT I was not totally against REYBEN which is basically canon at the end. As I said I don’t know what to think of it yet...

In conclusion the real tragedy of this story is the fact that Ben dies :( totally useless death imho. So the ending is actually bittersweet and not what u expect when go see a movie that should end the 40y.o. saga. That being said and done my opinion is mostly positive and ep. 9 is for me actually the best from Disney trilogy followed by ep. 7 and ep. 8 being the worst. 

Theres like sithton ;) of other stuff that I did not mention bcs the post would be like 100 miles long soo maybe in another post. Now id like to know what do you think? Have u seen it yet? Which ep is the best/worst? Which part of the movie did u like?

Sorry for the repost of the last gif and pic the are not mine also bless the person who made them

Sorry for typos or grammar I’m still SHOOK

[mikiruma]

🏳‍🌈📌💎🎥💕 for homestar runner!!!

🏳‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

GAY STRONG BAD... and while a lot of it is projection & kinny its not just that... i think it's hilarious how in an effort to make strong bad into this. whatever he is. bragging about how many ladies are on their knees just to date him? he always has these ridiculously beautiful girlfriends who love him so much, but you'll never meet them because they live in far off lands? or on the moon? (sbemail #67: autobiography) the though of trying to hit on the ONE girl to further his "womanizer" image disgusts him??? imagining a male character to be female so it would be "acceptable" to date him?? (sbemail #99: different town) imagining a male character falling in love with him but only expressing distaste outside the imagination sequence? (sbemail #130: do over) receiving a love letter in an email from a dude but only saying so much as "it just wouldnt work out" when he remembered people are watching him??? (sbemail #8: brianrietta) TEXTBOOK!!!! hes gay man!!!! yeah theres internalized stuff which is. kinda what im hinging on but like. he's gotten better over the years w his general personality shift. im just disappointed that this probably wasnt how he was meant to be written at ALL but like. if i had free reigns over the show i'd want him to find acceptance and realize yeah, you can be gay and still commit arson.

(other than that homestar/homeschool/champeen/strong mad are autistic. also coach z is trans & him and bubs are married. i also rly like trans strong bad)

📌 how did you find your hyperfixation?

my uncle actually introduced it to my sibling & i way back when!! and we hadnt actually talked about it SINCE he told us abt it... until last time he was in town!! and i didnt even know he remembered it until he saw the trogdor board game which came in the mail the day before & we got to go crazy go nuts over that again!!! (i dont rly remember much of the introduction other than. we were at my grandparents house for christmas or something & i had to go home to visit the site... and i was like 9 or 10) anyway cool uncle rights

💎 are there any fun facts or trivia that you would like to share?

the brothers chaps have regularly used the fan-owned homestar runner wiki as a resource... useful when u put out as much content as they do! the wiki is credited in all five episodes of strong bad's cool game for attractive people in the "special thanks" section, the brothers have mentioned the wiki itself by name in interviews & at least one toon (that i've seen), just over the past few days on strong bad's twitter page they linked to one of the pages! it is an incredible resource if you wanna know everything about everything in the series, but i think it's really something knowing the creators use it as well. oh yeah and they donate when they can to help keep the servers afloat when the site runs donation drives so. that's pretty cool.

🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation?

"favorite scene" or "favorite toon".... im gonna drop some of my favorite toons (or the ones i quote the most) bc most are 3-5 minutes long

fall float parade

sbemail #129: garage sale

pumpkin carve-nival

doomy tales of the macabre (cw: body horror)

halloween potion-ma-jig

i killed pom pom! (cw: alcohol)

sbemail #206: videography

sbemail #110: for kids

play date

donut unto others

where my hat is at? (cw: alcohol)

the homestar runner goes for the gold

the homestar runner enters the spooky woods (cw: emetophobia, (one) dead animal is part of homestar's final fear)

sbemail #207: too cool

a decemberween mackerel (cw: unsanitary in an easter egg)

added some content warnings just in case, also the links in red go to the official site while the black links go to youtube!

💕 tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

i will lay down my life for strong sad no questions asked. he deserves several hugs. i would like to be his friend. i like to think if everyones aware theyre in a cartoon and does their own thing outside what we see on the site, then like... hopefully theyre nicer to him.... i know its fun to rag on him bc he is kind of an easy target but listen. goth king. similar music taste. we totally would have hung out in middle school. also thinkin abt how him and strong bad used to get along.... bro.... i would like to see more of that....

[avengerscompound]

The Unicorn - Chapter 14

The Unicorn:  A Pepperony Fanfic PREVIOUS

Series Masterlist

Buy me a coffee with Ko-fi Word Count:    2075

Pairing:  Tony Stark x F!Reader x Pepper Potts

Warnings:  Sex talk.  Pregnancy

Synopsis:  The three of you go house shopping in New York to see if you can find something you’re all happy with.

Chapter 14

Over the next few weeks, things ramped up a lot.  There was another ultrasound to be had at 8 weeks and Tony and Pepper were determined to figure out where you should all live that gave the best options for school and work.

You seemed completely nonplussed on the issue.  You still went to Avengers training in the early morning and you continued going to your lab in the afternoon.  Just now before you left you seemed to struggle with the thought that you might throw up first.

By the time of the eight-week ultrasound, you weren't just thinking about it.  You had to factor in an extra ten minutes for throwing up before you made your way down for the dawn run.  It never stopped you though.  If you could go to training hungover a little bit of morning sickness wasn't going to stop you.

The strange thing was that Pepper seemed to be suffering with it too.  Initially, the three of you had put it on her just not handling vomit very well.  It wasn’t a totally uncommon thing that when someone threw up it might set someone else off.  Pepper had never been the weak stomached type but it was possible worries about the pregnancy was already making her slightly nauseated.

By the time of the ultrasound both Tony and you were teasing her about it being sympathy vomit.

The ultrasound went fine everyone was excited to see the twins again.  They still kind of just looked like a weird blurry picture of packaging peanuts.   Tony did still feel both relieved and excited when he heard the fast squish-squish sound of their heartbeats.

After the ultrasound, the three of you went to the first of the choices for the new home.  New York City.

When Tony had made the move to the compound he’d dissolved all his property.  Avengers Tower had become the Baxter Building.  It was probably the least practical course for them because it would mean reopening a branch of Stark Industry so that Pepper had an office and you had a lab, buying a home, and possibly opening a branch of the Avengers if you were set on remaining on the team after your maternity leave was up.

Tony had booked them the penthouse suite at the Gramercy Park while they looked at options.

“Dalton.  That’s the reason.”  Pepper said.  Her heels clicked loudly on the garish marble floors of the Upper East Side mansion they were inspecting.

The house was hideous.  The ‘American Renaissance’ period of architecture was a travesty.  The whole place, with its marble floors, chandeliers, ceiling murals featuring cherubs and gold scrollwork, looked more like a museum than a home.  It was dated, to say the least.  And dated to a period of opulence with no taste or subtlety.  All Tony could think was apart from the library which he’d keep for Pepper (the murals would have to go), the pool and the cinema, he’d gut the whole thing and start over.

“I don’t know, Pep.  It could have 100 Dalton’s but there’s no yard…”

“There’s a roof garden.”

“You want the twins playing on the roof?”  He said raising an eyebrow.

“Right, of course.”  She said heading into the kitchen.  “This is nice.”

“Yeah.  Very light and spacious.  I still think… I’d have to invest at least a cool billion to have us set up and even then it wouldn’t be right and it doesn’t feel like a home.”  He said running his hand over the floating kitchen island.

“What do you think?”  Pepper asked turning to you.

“I don’t love it.”  You said.  “I mean, doesn’t it scream masked orgy to you?  I bet naked asses have been all over everything.”

“Oh yeah.  I thought it looked familiar.”  Tony teased.

“God, you’re disgusting,”  Pepper said, whacking him.  Tony laughed and rubbed his arm.  “Well, we don’t have to get this one.  There were more options.”

“Yeah, but they’ll all be either Townhouses or Penthouses.  They won’t be where we can teach them to ride their bikes or run around with their dog.  We’ll have to take them to the park every time we want to do something like that.”  Tony said.  “Plus there’s the other investments involved.  S.I. is upstate now.  I’d have to reopen here.”

“The Avengers.”  You added.

“Yeah, I moved that because it was unsafe to have it just - in the middle of the city.”  Tony agreed.

Pepper pursed her lips.  She didn’t like that you wanted to stay with the Avengers the same way she didn’t like that Tony wouldn’t give up being Iron Man back in the day.  “We can consider it though right?  That’s what we’re doing here?  Looking at each option and picking the best?”

“Yeah, you're right.  Being here is better than in the compound.”  Tony conceded.  “I don't know how big the pull to Dalton is compared to just buying land near the compound and building exactly what we want though.”

“There aren't any schools around the compound though.”  Pepper complained.

“Start your own one, Elon Musk style.”  You said.

“We are not starting our own one like Elon.”  Pepper said sternly.

“I don't know… Maybe we should.  Give another incentive for people to stay on if it was more family friendly.”  Tony said with a shrug.

“Tony…”  Pepper sighed.  He knew that tone so he dropped it.

You went out to the balcony and looked out over the park.  Tony came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.  “It is a cool city though.”  You said.

“I won't argue that.”  He agreed, kissing your neck.

“Can we get out of this house?  I feel like I'm in a museum and the temptation to just touch everything for no good reason is making my fingers itchy.”  You said.

Tony chuckled and his hands ran over your stomach.  It was still far too early to show.  Even so, he loved that he could touch you and know that his children were in there and it wouldn’t be too long until he got to hold them.  It helped put that nervous impatience he felt in check.  “I’d gut it if we bought it.”

“Oh, yeah?”  You said turning in his arms.  “Not the library.”

“No, but that mural for sure.  I’d make it more shelves.”

“Oh, tell me more.”

“All the ugly ass marble and gold would go.  I’d change the light fittings to something sleeker but still a feature.  I’d keep timber as a feature, but make it less ornate.  Sleek lines but the timber would make it feel more home than office like.  The art would be modern but not surreal.  Maybe some Warhol and Pollack.  Maybe include some impressionists to break it up.  I’d install FRIDAY obviously.  The kitchen would be a similar layout but modern.  White and black.  Granite tops not marble.  I'd make the first floor about entertaining and the top two for us.  Bedrooms.  Living room.  That would be our family space.  It would be warmer colors.  Colors that take mess more.  I'd put a lab for us in the basement.  Probably a garage too but I might keep my of my collection out here.  There would be an office for Pep.  A gym.  I'd keep the cinema and the pool.”

You grinned and pecked his lips.  “Your mind has been racing even though you don't want this place.”

“Well, I mostly just want my girls to be happy.  If buying this eyesore makes you happy, then I’m happy.”  He said.

“That’s sweet.  But it won’t.  I don’t even think Pepper is sold on it.”  You said pulling him back inside.  “God, that bathroom is going to be in my nightmares.  The green marble toilet.”

Tony laughed.  “Yeah, that would be first to go.”

They made their back inside and found Pepper coming down the stairs followed by the real estate agent.  “Okay.  Let's go.  I think I’ve seen enough.”

“Good.  Let’s get something to eat.”  Tony said.  “I’m feeling Gray’s Papaya.”

Pepper scrunched her nose.  “I think the smell would make me throw up.”   She said.  “If you want local let’s go to Katz’s.”

You looked her up and down.  “You’re gonna need to dial in this sympathy sickness thing or see a doctor because I feel like you’re stealing my thunder.”

She scowled.  “I’m not doing it on purpose.”

“So, go see a doctor.”  You pushed.

Tony followed you outside where Happy was waiting with the car.  The three of you slid into the back seat and Pepper huffed.  “I just… it’s only in the mornings or certain smells.  It’s got to just be some weird sympathy thing.”

“Maybe you’re actually pregnant,”  Tony said.  He’d meant it as a joke but as soon as the words were out of his mouth it was like something clicked into place.  Maybe she was pregnant.  He couldn’t remember when she last had her period, and they’d been tracking it regularly right up until they did the first IVF run with you.

“Ha-ha, very funny, Tony.”  Pepper snarked.

“But maybe you are pregnant, Pepper.”  You said.

“You do kind of look like you’re glowing.”  Happy added looking in the rearview mirror.

“No.  How could I be?  We did all that IVF.”  She stopped talking and seemed to try and count something off on her fingers.  “How could I be?”

“Hap, stop at a pharmacy and get some pregnancy tests would you?”  Tony said.

“You got it, boss.”  Happy replied and swerved the car around, double parking it outside a CVS on Lexington.  He jumped out and ran inside as horns sounded behind him and someone cursed them as they went around.

“But… we couldn’t.  It wasn’t working.”  Pepper said.

“I can’t explain it Pepper, but it’s possible, right?  It would explain this.”  Tony said.

“How come you get glowing and I get a breakout on my jaw?”  You snarked.

“The glow is oily skin.”  Pepper said absentmindedly.  “It depends on how dry your skin was to begin with.”

“God damn it.”  You cursed.

“What will we do?”  Pepper said looking at him.  “We already have twins.”

“Triplets?”  Tony said making an exaggerated shrug.  He was pretty far from actually being worried about this.  He was actually pretty excited at the thought of the possibility of a large instant family.

“Does it count as triplets if two different people are carrying them?”  You asked.

“I don’t know.  I mean, they’re genetically me and Pepper and they’ll be due roughly the same time.” He mused.  “What counts?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s housed in the same uterus.”  You said.

“Can we please argue about that when I’m not freaking out”  Pepper groaned.

Happy ran back out and jumped into the car passing the paper bag back to Tony.  “Hotel?”  He asked.

“Yes, please,”  Pepper said.

“And can you swing past Katz’s after.  Get us some Matzo Ball Soup, a garden salad, and a Reuben.”  Tony added.

“And Knish.”  You added.  “Potato ones.”

“Sure thing.”  Happy said pulling back into traffic.

He drove the three of you back to the Gramercy and Tony lead you and Pepper back up to the Penthouse.  Pepper was in full panic mode by the time they got upstairs and rushed straight into the main bathroom and locked the door.

“Are you okay in there, Pepper?”  You called, leaning on the door.

“Yes, leave me alone to pee in peace.”  She called back.

You snorted and moved to Tony.  “Well then,”  You said.  “I bet she is.”

“I’m not taking that bet.”  He said.

“Oh go on.  A billion dollars.  I’ll bet you a billion dollars.”

“What do you need a billion dollars for?”

You shrugged and flopped down on the couch.   The door opened and Pepper slumped out.  “Positive.  There wasn’t even a wait for lines to show.  It was right away.”

Tony rushed to her side and pulled her into a hug.  A second later you had slammed into their sides and hugged them both tightly.

“Oh my god, this is amazing,”  Tony said.

“We’re going to be pregnant at the same time.  How awesome is that?”  You added.

“I don’t - how - how do we do this?”  She said.  “How did this happen?”

Tony really didn’t know the answer to that.  All he knew for sure was he had the resources and he was excited.  He was going to be part of a big family and he’d make sure they didn’t have to worry about anything.

// NEXT

[mare-sanguis]

Winston/Monty pt. 11 part 1 out of 2 because its loooong

Scott cleaned the dishes while Winston took his medicine.

"You should visit his grave. You know... I dont think you failed him. He's not disappointed in you- but proud of thta you tried."

"Maybe."

"He really trusted you to do that. Did he told you that?"

Scott nooded.

"Then you already know that he wont be disappointed in you."

"You really think so... right?"

"Yes. He's your friend."

Scott sighed and looked down in the sink.

"Jeff was really a nice guy- he had a huge heart and supported so many. The funeral was the absolute worst. So many people crying, disturbed. He died to young."

"You really liked him."

"Well of course I do."

Winston smiled.

"No."

"'No' What?"

"I didnt mean it like that. Not as your best friend."

Scott didnt responds to that directly.

"He was just a friend. I told you."

"Would you say the same if you'd look at me? Almost everytime you talk about him you won't look at me. You're hiding something."

"Theres nothing to hide."

Winston sighed and stood up.

"Maybe you'll tell me later. I wont pressure you into something you dont want to say. I'll go to sleep now. You can chose one of the quest rooms. One is near mine, the other ones are on the 3rd floor. Good night."

Winston left and leaves Scott alone in the kitchen.

"Fuck it. I wasnt in love with him." He whispered to himself.

"He was my best friend, not my first male crush:"

Why would he even think about that if he wasnt?

He stood there for some seconds more until he decided to go to one of the guest rooms.

He choosed the one near Winstons.

They didnt saw each other until the next day.

Scott checked on Winston- He'ss still asleep- all the stress and probably the medicine knocked him out pretty hard.

He took a shower and got dressed- after that he decided to drive hom to grab some stuff. He left Winston a note in case he would wake up while he was gone.

He took Winstons car to drive home where he packed up some clothes and put on new ones.

Scott looked at he clock. Must be lunchtime at Liberty now. There was still some unfinished business in this school for him. And since he was in town now anyway he could visit this hellhole.

He get back into the car and drove to the school. He went there long enough but after 8 month and the second visit... it still felt weird.

He was the one the school chose to give Montys stuff to since his parents didnt care enough for it.

After he arrived at school he parked his car in a parking lot near by the school, then he stepped out and took a deep breath.

No one was around so he felt at least a bit more comfortable. All that changed after he entered the school building. The halls were filled with students. People he know and some he dont.

But no one seemed to notice him. Luckily. At least he thought so.

Without any further thinking he walked straight towards the principals office- but stopped after someone grabbed his arm and some other called his name.

"Scott!"

He got dragged away by the one who grabbed his arm.

"Long time no hypocrite. Didnt expect to see you around here anymore after you buggered off after the whole Bryce "rape" thing."

Scott tried to stay calm.

"What do you want?"

"We just wonder why you're here and that you still have the courage for it."

"Why? Should I feel afraid of you?"

"Maybe."

"I dont. Let me go, I have somethng to take care of."

"What is it?"

"Non of your business."

"You know whats our business?"

"What?"

"Why are you walking around with a fucking faggot?"

"I dont understand."

"We saw you with hime- the last days. The one guy with pale skin and black hair. The faggot."

He just looked at them.

"The faggot? Yeah?" taking this word in his mouth made him feel disgusted.

"Dont you think its time to stop using thie word? How old are you? 10?"

"Why are you defending him? Are you one of them now too?"

The other guys laughed.

"I mean look at him- hes probably going back to him. Thats why hes wearing his bes clothes."

The guys continued to laugh.

"And even if I am- it not your problem anymore. I'm not your friend anymore. So I can do what ever the fuck I want."

"So youre fucking him. Disgusting. Monty would have beat the shit outta you. Sadly he died because someone rat about what he did."

Scott laughed this time.

"I bet he would have. Totally. Except I was a trued friend of him and he never judged me."

He turned around and pushed past between the other students- he still could hear them shit talking.

Scott didnt glanced over his shoulder and turned left around he almost ran Alex over.

"Scott."

"Alex."

"What are you doing here?"

"Taking care of Montys stuff."

"Hm. Jeard you talk with these guys over there. Are you staying with Winston."

"Maybe."

"How does it feel to be around someone whos fighting against us?"

"I dont care. You did something wrong and have to pay for it. Why are you even so angry about it? At me? You can stop that now. Its getting annoying."

Scott walked down the hall and Alex followed him, he entered an empty room.

"I am because I want to."

Zach appeared behind Alex, out of knowhere. As well as Clay, Justin and the rest of the group.

"So childish. You know I didnt sell out Montys trust so the next moment you could pin the murder of Bryce on him. I'm not your friend- The only one I actually just cared about in thsi whole group was Clay. And because I dont owe you anything I can do what I want. Step up for what you did wrong. You cant serve justice while cobering up a murder."

Alex blood boiled with every word he siad.

"Why do you even care? I mean Monty was a criminal. Murder or not."

"Because- surprise- he was my friend."

"Why are you helping Winston?"

"Because he thinks the same:"

"Yeah? Really?"

Zach grabbed Alex arm ad whispered a silent "Lets go". But Alex didnt want to stop.

"You're just helping him because you think hes hot."

Scott blinked in confusion.

"And I think you just killed Bryce because he wanted to fuck up Zachs life. The person you love so much but wont admit it because you're a coward. Wont even notice hiw much he liked you back."

Alex got furious and shoved Zach away from him, angrily.

"How dare you?"

Scott laughed.

"Thank me later."

Zach looked back and forth between them and started to blush.

"Wha... not true!" and he rushed away.

Alex looked afte him.

"You're gonna pay for this" and then he followed him.

Clay stared at Scott for some seconds.

"What? Do you want to complain too? Because I really dont eanna end up in a fight with you."

"No I .... who told you to look after me?"

Scott rolled his eyes.

"Should be pretty obvious. Dont it? It was Jeff."

"Oh... really...?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I dont know. Maybe bevause he knew you neeede help or something."

"But he was around most of the time."

"He was but it was for the time he couldnt be around."

Clay nooded to that.

"So... do you really think Winston is hot?"

Justin started to laugh.

"Dude dont ask that."

"But..."

"What the fuck Clay?" Scott said in confusion.

"I'm sorry."

"You know..." Scott started. "Everyone finds Winston hot- even the most hetero guys alive."

Clay laughed at this and pat him on the shoulder.

"Good joke man. You looked so serious saying that."

"Thats beause I was being serious.

He shook his head slightly and then walked away. Grabbing Montys stuff from the office.

After that he took the emergrency exit and rushed to the car- with it, he drove home.

He entered the house and went straight to the kitchen- the box with Montys stuff still in his hands. He placed it on the counter.

Scott made some coffee and was about to open up the fridge as he heard steps that stopped right in the doorframe.

Winston stood there- with a bit of a shocked look on his face.

It made him worrying.

"Somethings up?"

Winston just hsook his head, still kinda tired because oth the meds.

"I just..." he rubbed his eyes."

"Its just the... look on you. The clothes. Monty used to ear the m all the time."

"Oh...yeah... I can change it for something else if you want me to. If its more comfortable for you."

"No." Winston shook his head. "Its fine. Really."

He noticed the box on the counter.

"Whats that?"

"Montys last belongings. I thought you might wanna have them. Its not much but enough for you I hope..."

Winston took a seat and grabbed the box.

"You were in school right? How was it?"

"Seems like everyone of my former so called "friends" hate me now. But I dont really care. Met Alex and his friend again to. Had a little fight. But wasnt that bad. Still feels weird going back there..."

"I can imagine that."

"Anyway Winston... how are you feeling?"

"Good. Better than yesterday."

They had breakfast together as Scott received a message.

Sheri. She wanted to meet them.

"Hey Winston?"

"Hm?"

"Gotta problem coming with me to visit Jeffs grave?"

"You really think I should come with you? Why do you even want to visit him now?"

"Sheri just wrote me - she wants to go there. And she invited you."

"Oh really? If she wants me to come I'll say yes."

He wrote her back, that they would meet at 2pm.

Sheri: "It really didnt sound like you want to visit him yesterday.

Scott: "That was yesterday. Now is today and my mood is better too."

 

Scott took the bag with his clothes out of the car after they finished eating and headed upstairs as Winston stopped him.

"Already feeling like home here dont you?" he siad, pointing at the bag.

"Oh- I just thought that I should stay for some days more. Just in case."

"Right. I know that." Winston smiled.

 

He carried his bag up the stairs and placed it on the bed, he sat down next to it. He choosed some dark clothes for that occasion even though he knew that Jeff probably wouldnt like that.

Winston watched him from the door frame silently. Scott ddint notice him because he was stcuck in a daydream.

"Are you ready?" Winston said finally and Scott almost jumped.

"I am - I think."

They got into Winstons car and drove the long way to the graveyard.

There he parked the car in an empty spot and togther they walked up the way- Sheri was already waiting for them there.

"Finally here- I think I was to early." She laughed and looked at Winston.

"Nice to see you again- now we'll introcude you to our best friend." she whispered quietly, not to disturb the other visitors.

Together they walked to Jeffs grave - which was decorated with many flowers.

"Looking good." Scott said, after seeing all these flowers.

"Obviously it must be. Jeff was such a sweetie."

Sheri claimed, Scott secretly agreed to it.

"So why'd you chose to come? Yesterday you sounded a bit stressed."

He looked at Winston for some seconds.

"Well... Winston helped me to understand that I shouldnt feel resposible for Montys death."

Sheri tilted her head slightly.

"What does that has to do with Jeff?"

"I...." he looked at Winston again. "I guess... I ahve to tell you something."

And he told her. About everything. About what Jeff told him- what he ased him for. About Monty. About Clay. That Scott flt like the burdern was all on him.

He strayed calm through all of it.

"He had to much hopes in me- Monty and the others dragged me deep into their darkness. That non of theri fault. If only, thene mine. Because I knew what would happen."

"Oh damn... But... he should've never left it all on you. Ther was no chance of you to handle it all alone."

"I did it anyway- I wanted to."

Sheri and Winston both waited for a clear answer.

"I wanted to make him proud. Ther are still things I will always deny. For the fact that its now to late and never was about any relevance."

Sheri laughed.

[dilfsdotnet]

Yo you should answer all of these scene questions👀👀

:OOO

you think so lad???? shit dawg i was thinkin just a few at a time but if that what u want my dear nonnie i will supply

1. wats ur scene name?

i was thinkin maybe ‘gods mistake’ would be a good one but then. i found a way to make it both danganronpa related, and, even better, a fucking pun as well. ‘kamukura kamukura jasqueen’, or just ‘kamukura jasqueen’ for short is good k thxxx

2. describe ur dream outfit!

oooo gosh this ones trickyy!! there are so many good outfits out there, especially in the scene community!! but it’d have to have a few tiny elements of dr cosplay to add a lil of my dangan-weeb culture in there ofc! more specifically, id really love to get one of kazuichis jumpsuit and just wig out and add shit like this just because i could:

(id just rlly love going out in all those glowy/shiny things at night like all that haha..and yes the shoes would probably kill me/my fuckin feet if i tried to walk in them but shut up i love them theyre cute as fuck)

3. describe ur dream haircut!

oo another tricky one!! i do like my regular hair, and honestly id be lying if i said i didnt love ibuki’s hairdo too but id defs have to go with something like this!!

yaaaassss, so pretty and spikeeeey! maybe id dye my natural hair colour black and/or add some funky colours if i ever actually got this style down!

4. describe ur dream room!

i have a lot of ideas for dream bedrooms actually, but heres a visual image of one of them i found!!!

MIKU ROOM MIKU ROOM MIKU ROOM MIKU ROOM

(this specific idea arose mainly just for the aesthetic but i also find it super cute and a good environment to be in general hhhnnggg)

5. if u could make anything out of kandi, wat would u make?

oh you mean those colourful beads and bracelet things??? i love those man!!! theyre so visually appealing to me aaaaa…id probably just make a fuck-ton of those and most probably use the little letter beads to say random words/phrases like ‘aubergine’ and ‘despacito’ knowing my shitposter self lmaooo! id definitely make a sansmaeda themed one too thoo fr

6. wat would u write on ur shoez?

it’d probably range from things like a simple kaomoji doodle to something randum and stupid like ‘seesaw’ bc yes asjnd

7. wat kinda piercingz/tattooz do u hav/want?

i dont think i rlly want any real piercings (at least not atm) but id totally go for those fake stick-on gemstone lookin’ ones! and as for tattoos, i cant rlly see myself gettin one of those rn either, but id want something like a mario power-up, preferably the bell one/cat suit powerup!!! its my favorite powerup and its sooo cute!!!

8. fave genrez?

i dont rlly have a specific genre, i like most kinds of music, but i rlly like energetic music that i can dance tooo!!! >w

9. fave bandz?

im a big fan of gorillaz and botdf!!! i like p!atd as well but havent listened to it in a while.. gatta catch up loool

10. fave songz?

my favs alternate a lot, but atm im super into ‘slow dancing in the dark’ by joji!!! so much emotiooon quq…also rlly hooked on botdf and jefree star’s ‘sexting’ tooo lmaooo

11. fave lyricz?

‘The world keeps spinning Among this sinning Oh what a cruel and disgusting place The purest moonlight Is bloodied by plight And screaming resonants But somehow I know That it’s all for show The world will reveal it’s true beauty soon And we’ll all reach towards the moon ‘

its so deep but its from a fucking kaito momota fansong and i love that asnkjdnefe

12. hav u evr been to a concert?

not in a damn long while my lad,, rip australians not havin many artists they like from other countries tour there ;-;

13. do u wanna be in a band?

ive always thought thatd be pretty cool ngl!!! tourin around with ur bandmate friends, makin awesome fuckin tunes, people lovin u and ur music, just livin the dream in general,, nice

14. wats da best soda/energy drink flavour?

havent rlly had any as of rn  my lad so i wouldnt know :/

15. wat do u miss most abt old internet?

i loved that we could all just be ourselves and act like the kids we are inside without bein reprimanded at all.. it aint rlly that much of an issue for me but i still think itd be a lot nicer if it was like that again sometimes,,

16. wats da best old meme?

ooohhh there are so many i still miss man! numa numa ermagerd and doge still remind me of the glory days…when old animeme was good and you could still haz ur cheezburgers in peace. also rage comics! rage comics were good what happened

17. best place 2 buy clothez?

i dont think theres any hot topics in australia but if there is. i will hunt it down you hear me

18. wat r ur fave accessoriez?

OH THERES SO MANY GOOD ONES??? as i stated b4 i rly love kandi bracelets and other glowy/led things!!! also rlly love ties with cute and fun patterns and long colourful and/or ripped socks like ibuki’s too hehe

19. wats ur best tip fr ppl that just got into scenecore?

im not rlly the best at advice, but my main point would be-just hav fun here dudes!!! dont let anyone else bulli u abt it, we’re supportive people, u can talk to me or anyone else whos willin to listen an/or help for reassurance ofc

20. opinion on furbiez?

oOH MY GOD YES. FURBIES. MY BABIES I WANT 10 OF THESE CHILDREN…I ACTUALLY HAVE A FURBY HE LIKES SLEEPING IN HIS SPECIAL DRAWER AND HIS NAME IS TINGLE I ADORE HIM I’LL POST A OF PICTURE LATER MAYBE

21. opinion on funko popz?

i like em and ive seen lots at eb games, but i dont buy em much..i do have a megaman pop with a broken arm tho loool

22. wats ur fave pattern? (zebra/leopard print etc)

i looove a lot of patterns but not gonna lie im always a sucker for rainbow checkerboard patterns yknow hehe!

23. fave color combo?

i dont have one rlly…soooo many possible comboooos…cx

24. sumthing u liked as a kid dat u still like?

im still going on girlsgogames and recently, ive finally mastered sues beauty machine!!!! its so good and fun all of ya’ll should try it my dudeeees

25. wats ur most used emoticon? 0w0

as most of ya’ll probs alredy know i spam ‘:O’ a lot, but one of my bigger favs is actually ‘x3′ and my fav kaomoji is ‘ଘ(੭ˊ꒳​ˋ)੭✧’ (both of them are so kyooot >w

26. wats ur fav typin quirk?

i luv talkin like dis, but i dont rly do it that often loool…i awso wuv tawking in ‘owo’ speak wike dis >//w//>

27. do u wish ur fllwrz talked 2 u moar?

hellz yeaaa!!! i luv followr interaction my dudee! it makes me super happi when u all talk to me heehee! x3c

28. tag ur fave scene blawgz!

:O !!! oh gawd!!! i dont know many atm but heeereee!

@xxadam-antidotexx (op of the ask meme)

@glitchkichi (not sure if this counts but their stuff’s rlly cool >v

@otonashi-banana (scene boyf…wuv im more than anythin >///w///>

29. wat got u into scenecore?

i dont remember exactly how it happened but i’d always sorta wanted to go back to the glory days that was the old web and the scene era, and that, coupled with a bright, colourful aesthetic that i could really enjoy, drew me in like a moth to a neon colored flame ig looollll

30. how long hav u been scene?

i’ve only been officially apart of the community for about a few months now (at time of writing) i reckon so some things are still a lil new to me ig ^^;;

31. wats da best thing abt being scene?

the freedom of bein able to express myself 4 one thing, and its just so fun being so ‘out-there’ yknow???? it feels so great really

32. do u hav a fursona?

i…actually used to but ive moved on from the furry fandom and ive grown more attached to my human sona anyway sooo :/

33. r u in sum “cringy” fandomz?

YEA man!! i dont rlly think dr is inherently considered ‘cringey’ but undertale is and im in that one for sure!!! i also kinda technically never left the skylanders fandom(?) so theres that too ig??? oh yeah and who wants to let me draw my old moshi monsters characters COWARDS

34. do u liek plushiez?

YASSSS QUEEEN!!!! i have HEAPS of them in my room on my desk with my gonta shrine

35. do u liek stickerz?

also a big yaaassss from me dawggg!!! i love them and i love those ones that you stick on your fase like this!

its so cuuute!!!

36. do u hav a friendproject?

i dont, not at the moment a least, actually! didnt even know what it was til recently but it looks kewl haha

37. do u hav any other scene account?

well, i haz this one, and i also have an emowire account for shuichi if that counts!!

38. do u make art? (drawingz, blingeez, etc.)

YES!!! i love to draw and i also make blingee edits sometimes!!! ITS SO FUN XD !!!

39. wats da most scene thing? (anything!)

hmmm, weeell…i think the most stereotyped thing would be that kewl, suuuper big hair like this;

its really prettyyyy, and i love all that colouuur!!!

40. ask ur own randum question!!

hm, oh wowie, since the anon didnt specifically ask this one…POTATOES!!! X3

phew, finally done, that was a lot of typing! this was so fun to do though, so thank u nonnie!!! :3

[survivormagictreehouse]

Episode #8 “CAN YOU SAY MESS” -Cindi

https://youtu.be/kJt8-zZe8Ck

-this is fucked up i have to confess tribal is in 4 mins.. theres a bunch of stuff about this vote why do people know zch is in a 5 person alliance .. . .. . .. . . . . . why is cindi voting out zach why do i have individual immunity lmao i want zach on the jury ://////////

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNbHN000ka8

-alright ladies we made it to the merge. finally back together with Gavin loml. also it seems that Jess, Zach and Keegan missed me as well based on how the whole touchy subjects thing went for me so thats cute. ALSO TIMMY Z IS HERE AND WE ONLY HAVE TO CALL HIM TIMMY BECAUSE THE OTHER ONE IS GONE!!! side bar: timmy and i are bestie pals and im so excited to finally be on a tribe together umm thats pretty much all i've got for now. also there are only 5 OG Annie's left in this game and 3 of them are working with me for the moment so I think I am in a pretty decent spot. apparently the OG Annies called me and Jess threats so they can go honestly. but half of them are already gone now i think so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-this tribal is about to be really messy and im really tired of cindi's bullshit about refusing to change her vote

-MERGE BABY!!!! WOOOOOO~!!!  So, This tribe seems cool!I;m mainly excited i made merge. My allies are currently Keegan, Jess and I think Gavin. I want to ally with the people I haven't played with yet. sorry this is short

-So I feel like I was totally on the bottom after the Jay vote. I feel like I can’t turn to my old allies (although I have) and like. In touchy subjects when I was voted most likely to be voted out next I had like one person come to me and be like “oh that’s so not true. I don’t see you as next” but like. I wasn’t even surprised that I got it. I am kinda relying on allying with new people but you can’t force people to ally without you. Everytime I have tried to ally with people I have already played with it fails. So now that narrows it down to Collin, Cindi, and maybe Rachael. But I need To get close to them first. Collin also knows how I played in Tashirojima. He has brought it up to me 2 separate times now, so I’m scared he might think I’m going to play like that again and try and target me or something. Idk. I’m just a big ball of scared.

-So 5 people of got immunity. I got like 9th. I'm real upset about it. I know it doesn't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Anyway. I;m like 90% sure I;m going home but I'll try my best to ya know. not. I really hope I can work with collin although I don't really have an alliance. so lets see how this goes.

https://youtu.be/wLA8Pt4bXlQ

https://youtu.be/r-8Y2n2NGJo

-Welcome to Merge O' Clock! We finally made the merge, although unless I'm dumb (which is entirely possible) we haven't yet made the jury. The post says a final 3 with 9 jury members, and there is 13 of us left. Interesting. But anyways, I made the merge and I'm super happy about that. It's very exciting to win the previous season and actually be in the running to win this season. Like I feel like I've played a pretty good game so far and I have enough alliances and strong bonds to make it far. Unless I get targeted for that reason. In terms of trust rankings, lemme do that real quick: Most Trusted JESS ZACH GAVIN RACHAEL TIMMY BIRCH CINDI CHIPS BODHI ALI = RUTHIE = COLLIN I've currently got my Canadian Alliance with JESS and BIRCH, as well as an alliance with GAVIN, ZACH and RACHAEL. There's also the alliance with TIMMY, GAVIN, JESS and ZACH thought I don't know if that one will stick around much. I'm trying hard to build a relationship with CINDI, who is amazing. If I can get all these things aligned, we can vote out RUTHIE, ALI, CINDI, CHIPS, COLLIN and BODHI before there's really anything to worry about. But the game is never that easy. My biggest goal right now is to make sure I win immunity for this first vote. The first merge vote can be super telling where everyone is standing and I need to make sure that the target doesn't somehow fall on me. I have to stay safe for at least this vote. 

-Guess who’s immune at the merge tribal council! THIS GUY! And also COLLIN, JESS, GAVIN and BODHI. Surprise twist where five people win immunity, which is crazy. I’m mostly just vibing right now and seeing where people’s heads are at. Been having some nice conversation with ALI, COLLIN and CINDI. Will I work with them ever? I’m not sure. I’m very happy that JESS and GAVIN are safe. I trust them a lot and hope we can work together moving forward. I just need to make sure I keep my head low enough to avoid a target but high enough that people know this is my game to win. 

-So if everything I have been told so far is true, this is going to be a very messy vote. Initially it was BIRCH and CHIPS whose names were on the line but as the day progressed it became between ZACH and BIRCH. And honestly there is merit in voting for either of them. ZACH is a very good player with a metric crap tonne of connections but I've also been loyal to him since the start of the game. BIRCH could be a super loyal ally moving forward but I've also betrayed them at a previous point in the game. Currently, it seems like BIRCH, CHIPS, RUTHIE, GAVIN are for sure voting for ZACH. Currently, it seems like ZACH, RACHAEL, CINDI, COLLIN are for sure voting for BIRCH. But also as I was typing this out, BODHI created an alliance chat with COLLIN, GAVIN, JESS and myself. I'm not even sure if it's an alliance or if BODHI just wanted to make a joke about the Illuminati. Mom? Come pick me up I don't want to be here anymore. 

-okay so its merge time... and i've been doing bad at confessing because i've been going through it but its time to reassess and get back into GEAR. so timmy died last tribal, he was kinda being bananas and targetting rachael in a really flawed way (bodhi would've probably been the move). i like rachael even though i'm about to come after her friendgroup full force, and it just wasn't the time. also... timmy is the only person i've played with multiple times who has outplaced me each time so KJFDSA... was biased to end that. only other risk of that on this tribe is bodhi, but might be sending him packing sooner rather than later. anyway so merge and first things FIRST. I FINALLY. FINALLY. get put on a tribe with JESS. I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY FOR MY SPIDERMAN POINTING AT SPIDERMA QUEEN. i'm telling her too much (me telling j-names too much who is shocked), but we are gonna mob boss it as two tribe figureheads and keep it PUSHING. Otherwise I love gavin… I used my connection with sarah g to him for clout because im shameless but I love him and he seems relatively disconnected on the tribe… he looks like kori who would catfish games so im like looks around but he gives good energy hope he likes me. chips is a SWEETHEART and was also on the bottom so looking to scoop him up. Okay so birch. Birch is lovely, birch played in my first tumblr survivor season. Birch has SO much personality… in chats of 2+ people, but in our PMs a better name for them is the SAHARAH. Love your lack of energy, go give us NOTHING. But what can you do. I ALSO might need them in even tho if I get one more ‘Nice!’ from them as a response I will perform walking from the cast. Keegan hasn’t messaged me yet…taps foot. Will not be messaging a MAN first not on my watch. Zach is sweet but he is a CHILD AND I DON’T TRUST CHILDREN IN games. I also just booby trapped him in the idol hunt so… looks around. I also have one key and I need ONE MORE TO get into this mystical last book which im ON A MISSION TO DO. In other news collin leaked the 6 person alliance so looks around… that man has such  white gay who wins games energy and im not having it. Ideal Bootlist: Zach > Keegan > Bodhi > Collin > Cindi > Birch > Timmy > Rachael > Chips > Jess (F3: Me/Ruthie/Chips)

-okay so im deflated again. first off, the conglomerate of friends has got to go its so frustrating, the mesopotamia/svalbard gathering is really really disaster. they make their friend group so obvious and yet there is nothing we can do. the zach/collin/rachael/bodhi/cindi (?) svalbard/mesopotamia, PLUS people who voted with zach like keegan/timmy. its just so ANNOYING, can people WISE UP. i love jess, and im so so excited to work together but she also can be so slippery and wishywashy so its a real.. looks around, we need to wake cindi up. in other news... this tribe is really okay with letting collin win. he is misting EVERYONE and everyone is just sitting there and letting it happen. he has such white gay who just wins this game and everyone is gonna just LET HIM. final man i wanna complain about is keegan. LISTEN SIR, you will not catch me messaging a man first, so if you are upset about us having not spoken... then message me. then speak to me. dont tell people we havent spoken when i've made JUST AS MUCH EFFORT AS YOU. its not my fault you are so unbelievably dry in pms. grrrr i just HATE men and i have to deal with SO MANY on this tribe.

-okay so. we are maybe voting out the child i truly do not know. jess, gavin and cindi never dissed. open to working with me, not relying exclusively on pregame connections, literal legends. chips and birch are literally making it so hard to save them, they both have the biggest mouths i've EVER seen and the subtlety of a reversing truck. they have SUCH big mouths and are making the odds of a zach idol play INCREDIBLY high. also zach can go making majority alliances without me, its shenanigans like this that get you merge boot Sir.

-so im sitting on call with cindi as we plot the end of the zach. this is so sad i feel bad for him even tho this is definitely a good move for me AHHhhh.

-I'm crossing my fingers that I somehow pulled out a win for this creative comp (I doubt it because it looks like a toddler drew my tree house) because I have been very anti social! I've been talking to people in PM's a bit but the chat is just too many people and going too fast for me, LOL.   I just hope our little group of four will stick together.  I haven't talked to them as much since we merged but I guess it is good that we are all mingling and trying to maybe find some cracks? I've talked to Chips, Jess and some of the others from the merged tribe a good bit. 

Tea time!  So Chips wants to get Collin, Cindi, Rachael, Zach or Bodhi out because they are in some kind of alliance for some games they were in? I don't know I didn't know they were all so well connected lol. Alsooo Jess and I have a two person alliance consisting of ourselves that we are referring to as the Jills heh heh.  I guess right now I'm closest to Jess?  I am going to tell her whatever I hear name wise and feel she will do the same to me and I'm hoping that we can like, feed each other information and go to the end while also working with other people if that makes sense.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOgNIykteiM&feature=youtu.be

This round is a split between Zach and birch for who is going home this week. My treehouse got 6th so I sadly missed the immunity mark This week could possibly come down to just 1 vote. That’s why Zach and I traded powers so we can know who voted with who so we can make sure we understand who is voting where for next round. 

so I mad it to the merge! Good stuff! Anyway, the immunity challenge had a twist where multiple people are immune. And i am not. Thats what I get for taking a picture of a tree with 🦕! After results I hear no one saying a name and I don't like that because I don't want whatever random alliance that has already formed dictating... so I decide I'm going to spread Zach. I think he stands a good shot of success because he is well of not only in meta-gaming with relationships but also controlled the premerge. Sooooo I started saying him. Anyway, I am hoping people are actually voting with him them I will feel comfortable to make an alliance. Cindi is part of or immediately under the core group that has taken it upon themselves to say names. I heard from her they originally wanted to do my name because "easy" and not as well liked on the tribe. They were between me and Birch but Cindi said no thanks to me. Anyway, they have been spreading Birch and I have been spreading Zach and now I know it is between the two. If Zach has a power and takes control this round I am still happy I planted the seed and he should not be long for the game. Also, if they do not follow through in voting Birch and vote me instead I will feel better about my self for doing something because I feel loke I've really let down the hosts with how inactive I have been with the move. Hope bringing the drama redeems me just a little.

SO WHAT IS NOT THE TEA. LEAKING ASS LEAKERS IS NOT THE TEA. I'm in a giant alliance with Svalbard/Mesopotamia people and I'm like that is chill or whatever. But Gavin somehow knows about this alliance but doesn't know that I'm in it? So, like, uhhh don't like that. Don't want to fucking be associated with a majority alliance. Plus I don't want Chips being on the bottom. I love Chips. But love the way that Birch decided it was me voting them out? Also that they decided to just, like, give a name of everyone voting with them to Zach, who we're voting out. CAN YOU SAY MESS.

AHHHH! okay so this round has been absolutely CHAOTIC. from the stress of meeting so many new people, and trying to secure my place in this game going forward, to spending HOURS building a treehouse in the sims and being one of the five people to win immunity because of the twist i picked a few rounds ago (thanks for EXPOSING ME BY THE WAY). but going into the round, i honestly had my sights set on zach. he was by far the most connected and well-rounded player in the merge in my opinion, and something needed to be done about it. so, with that i (along with jess) had our work cut out for us. this move needed to happen NOW, or it might just never happen. together, we went around and planted seeds, spread information, and made sure that people realized zach not only had alliances with them, but everyone else in the game as well. i felt like i had made pretty strong connections with ali, cindi, and ruthie, and those were definitely three people we would need to make this move happen. so, we got to work spreading zach's name (with birch somehow exposing everyone but me basically). the hardest part for me was lying to rachael because i love her so much, but she was one of the people that were too close to zach. i knew i needed him to go, so she would be closer to me... but with that comes regaining and rebuilding the trust lost by lying to her as well, so once again, i have my work cut out for me in a totally different way--it will take time, but i think she will realize that she does need me, i just need to prove it to her.

https://youtu.be/KoXLMf5QhxI

https://youtu.be/8g2eyHMOZbI

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Click HERE to watch the Round 8 (merge) Cast Assessment!