#otp I will kill every god to keep you safe

[emmster]

That one board that we all freaked out about

[runespoor7]

I mean obviously I’m am going to ask you about chengxian, for the ask meme

What made you ship it?

It was the most interesting relationship in the book. I'm a sucker for childhood friends with broken promises, for grief, for misunderstandings over loyalty and love, and for relationships whose resolution in canon is bittersweet.

It still took some time and effort before I started really shipping it. I was theoretically open to shipping it but I hadn't yet read fics that really sold me on it (this was in 2019, I think). Then as an experiment I put a WWX-inspired character in the setting I was GMing for the JC and JYL NPC stand-ins to have him to play off of. Turned out I did ship them.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

😬

*wide, helpless, expansive gesture*

It's never simple with them. It's always fraught. They love one another but they also resent one another. Hunting demonic cultivators is about WWX still maybe being alive. Maybe JC can bring himself to kill WWX this time, or maybe he can find a way to bring WWX back home and forgive him. WWX promises to be with JC but he ends up promising that he won't stay ("like my father served your father") but he didn't mean it with an end. the mess that is the fraughtness of WWX's liminal space when it comes to his social rank.

love hurts, what hurts is love.

the fact that the one 'leading' is WWX, not JC, going against the accepted social order. (tbh, if that wasn't the case, I probably wouldn't be into the ship.) it paints such a picture of WWX being so charismatic, and JC being so taken with him, that JC falls into being WWX's sidekick. no wonder YZY was awful about it.

JC keeping Chenqing like a mad dog and keeping Lotus Pier WWX-safe. I. god. JC rating WWX's attention >>>>>>>>>>>>> JC's self-respect every time, in every way. Amazing.

it's incredible to me how WWX asks JYL about love in a scene framed in a manner to make it subtextually point in the direction of LWJ (it's mdzs; the canon pair in mdzs is wgxn; there are no - explicit - love triangles in mdzs; and yet even WWX's original crush on LWJ is, uh. informed by JC and how WWX is with JC and the fact that LWJ is New and Not The Son of WWX's Benefactor. this is normal.), where it's apparent that WWX is scared of being in love because it changes how you act, it's a limit, it's a cage, you're limiting yourself for someone else - and then WWX does something for JC that is everything he was scared of.

and it does ruin him! it's terrible! so his romance with LWJ is everything his feelings for JC weren't. He's not the one doing the protecting. LWJ doesn't question him. There are no expectations of anything, no discussions of the future, no thoughts of society. LWJ is just such a comfort, just a good thing WWX gets because he wants it. Also LWJ isn't emotionally taxing af (this is a big one). (WWX kinda ends up YZY-ing himself at the end of the book but I'm not thinking about that.)

WWX's utter toxicity toward JC. not a iota of respect for either JC or JC's boundaries to be found, except when convenient for WWX.

they both really, really believe that WWX is better than JC in every way. it's very cool

look. i'm a simple person. arrogant genius jerk/grumpy dutiful tsundere otp.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I love the joke that chengxian isn't incest but both of them wish it were, but I think the only time one of them wished they were brothers was JC when he decided to sacrifice himself for WWX and he was lying in bed making morbid jokes. At least sacrificing yourself for your brother who is the better cultivator and can lead the sect would be simple. Forgivable. Good.

I also think they might grow to think of one another as brothers at some point post-canon, that's a sort of reconciliation that might happen, but to me it's key that during canon they don't know what they are to one another, they just know they're scarily, terrifyingly important, and there's no word for what they are to one another.

JC refused shixiong-shidi (in a shocking reversal of their normal dynamic, I think he forgot he did that and spent roughly two decades feeling insecure and weird that WWX doesn't call him shidi) and they can be nothing else, socially speaking. The love that dare not speak its name, if you would. And at that same time post-canon they could also decide that what they're to each other is that WWX used to be in love with JC, and maybe JC still is, and they're not brothers. Or maybe both! The point is, the definition of their relationship is uncharted waters and they never thought of each other as 'brothers' (much less called each other that).

2) WWX is incredibly bitter and resentful of giving his core to JC and that colors everything he thinks and says about JC afterwards, including after he's returned to life. Basically, he gave, and gave, and gave, and felt there was no gratitude, and he's unable to live the life he wanted, unable to reap the promises life made him, and JC isn't any more agreeable or tractable than before (less so, in fact!). It's not fair.

[kingsmoot]

theon for the ask game ofccc 🥰

offffcccccc 🖤🖤🖤 ty omen!!

My first impression

[13yo child voice] wooooow who is THAT who kicked gared's severed head omg he's so cool!!! he's my favorite, omg!!

My impression now

my fucking. BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Favorite thing about that character

if i had to pick just one thing it would be the way that theon doesn't fit in anywhere. there is nowhere he belongs. there is no one he feels truly safe and welcome with. there is no place or person that is his home. even the one person in all the world who truly loves him hurts him and he spurns her.

The whole of the realm hates you, Theon Old men hate you with their death rattle, and unborn children hate you in their mothers' wombs. They hate you in Dorne and they hate you on the Wall. No one likes you, Theon. Sorry.

Least favorite thing

there is genuinely nothing at all that i do not like about theon i am so serious. my OXYGEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Favorite line/scene

Favorite interaction that character has with another

my three theon otps!!

A character that I wish that character would interact with more

would have LOVED some gap filler scenes with theon and roose in agot though i understand why little asides like that were not included but oughhgh.... i also really want theon to meet mel as an actual prophet of the old gods vs. a charlatan granted power she does not understand. and as i keep saying i do think he will meet LSH along with jon!!

Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character

i've talked about this a bit with friends but the jarchivist!!! sooooo many text posts in both my jon and theon tags. you may never have wanted this, no, but i'm afraid you absolutely did choose it.

two children doomed to impossible circumstances by powers that be impossibly far beyond their comprehension and control, devoured by what they spent the whole of their miserable, bleak little lives running from (themselves!!!). chomped up by the web and the eye vs. chomped up by the flesh and the desolation 🖤🖤🖤

they would immediately hate one another soooooooo so so so so much if they ever met it'd be on fucking sight. you know what i think if jon read asoiaf he'd be a total stannishead. stannis and tyrion would be his two favorite characters.

A headcanon about that character

my favorite is that when he comes back to pyke he is no longer a good swimmer, which is a huge loss of something that was completely integral to his daily life as a child

A song that reminds of that character

An unpopular opinion about that character

i don't think theon is going to get ANY sort of big revenge arc and to suggest that he will reads as plainly ridiculous to me. he is not going to kill ramsay or roose he is not going to achieve symbolic justice against the starks or the boltons or against euron. a core theme across every single narratuve thread in asoiaf is the futility of revenge. theon especially is a character who through seeking to balance the scales against the people who wronged him dooms himself utterly and suffers everything he has done unto others tenfold. he is never going to get the gay little earring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Favorite picture

despite the blue eyes this is THEE theon art of all time to me it moves me like. to tears. it's so perfect. that's him, that's my boy. that's HIM. it's like overwhelming how much this is him. and the majesty of the crashing wave and his beautiful smile and his confident pose i aughhhthuwuwuwgha. i'm a wreck. genuinely.

[the-iceni-bitch]

Too Precious

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x fem!Reader (OTP)

Words: 1.2k

Summary: Your dog hates the Fourth of July, and Ransom is worried about him.

Warnings: explicit language, extremely, upsettingly soft and fluffy Ransom (like, I honestly hate myself for coming up with this), major fluff

A/N: Welp, this is a hard left turn from the filthy shit I’ve been churning out but it popped in my head and took me less than an hour to write. I don’t know why I’ve made these two so soft, it’s killing me in the best way, so now you all have to suffer with me.

I no longer do taglists, so if you want to stay up to date on all the latest filth, follow my side blog @the-iceni-library and turn on notifications!

You frowned lightly when Ransom got up for the third time in an hour, making you pause the movie again as he claimed he was going to the bathroom.

He’d been acting weird all night. You weren’t totally sure what was going on with him, the only thing that was different about tonight was that the occasional firework was going off as people prepared for the Fourth. Actually, you realized that every time an explosion occurred he made some excuse to leave the room for a few minutes.

His voice drifted to the living room from the hall, and even though you couldn’t make out what he was saying his tone was warm and reassuring. You let out a soft sigh when you rose to your feet to find out what he was up to, an inkling already niggling your brain as you made your way to the laundry room.

“Hey bubba, it’s ok.” Yep, he was doing exactly what you thought. “Don’t worry, bud, it’s just some noise.”

It had taken you a bit, but you were slowly starting to accept that your dog might like your boyfriend more than you. And the sight of him kneeling next to the big furball while he shook with anxiety was really cementing that fact.

“Ran.” He jolted when you spoke his name, giving you a slightly sheepish look but keeping his hand on Fionn’s head to give him reassuring ear rubs. “Baby, I told you, you’ve gotta act like everything is normal or it just reaffirms that he should be scared.”

“Honey, I don’t think I can do it.” God, both of them were giving you puppy eyes now, it was ridiculous. “He looks so terrified.”

“Sweetie, I promise the meds I gave him help with the stress, and having a safe space to go to is really helpful too.” You’d set up a nice little cubby for him to hide in when the noise got to be too much, and he was curled up in it now. “He’ll be ok if we just let him be, he might even wander out on his own eventually. C’mon, let’s go watch the movie.”

Ransom let you drag him to his feet reluctantly, giving the dog a forlorn look while you led him out of the room. He settled into the couch ok, resting his head against your chest and letting you curl your body around him with a deep sigh. Every time he heard an explosion, though, you could feel him tense up with a little start. Even your fingers running through his hair couldn’t help him relax, his eyes darting furtively to the hallway while he chewed on his lips with worry.

You had to put up with this type of shit for the whole week. Ransom refused to go to sleep until the fireworks had completely stopped and he could do a final check in on the dog to coax him up to your bedroom. As annoying as it was, it was also stupidly adorable. He’d almost refused to go to the massive fireworks display his family went to each year on the Third until you assured him your friend Becca was going to take amazing care of him, and that your old neighborhood barely had any fireworks so there was nothing to worry about.

Then the Fourth hit and the field near your house was apparently declared a designated war zone. Your poor dog was a cowering mess almost as soon as the sun went down, and even with the drugs and all the other anti-anxiety precautions you took, he was still shaking like a leaf in his little cubby. Ransom was almost as big of a mess, pacing around the house and wringing his hands while he tried to keep himself calm for the sake of your sweet pooch. 

“Ransom, please come to bed.” It was almost midnight, but there were still occasional explosions happening outside that made him jump. “This happens every year and I promise, he’s always fine.”

“I’m just gonna hang out for a little longer, baby.” He’d finally sat on the couch and was sipping on a beer, but the way his knee was bouncing let you know he was still freaking out a bit. “I’ll be up soon, ok?”

You just sighed deeply as you headed back up the stairs, rubbing a hand over your face and yawning while you made your way to your inviting mattress. Even with the intermittent noise, you quickly submitted to the pull of exhaustion, groaning with disappointment at the empty half of the bed next to you before your eyes drifted closed. 

Something woke you up around four hours later, though you weren’t sure what. You huffed when you noticed Ran’s side of the bed was still empty, getting out of the bed and wobbling on your sleepy legs as you determined to find out where exactly your stupidly soft boyfriend had fallen asleep.

He wasn’t on the couch when you got downstairs, and that made you frown. You had been certain he had passed out there while he waited for the fireworks to stop. The search of the guest bedroom also yielded no results, and you considered yelling to find him before something occurred to you.

As soon as you walked into the laundry room your chest started to ache. Your asshole boyfriend had crawled into the cubby you had set up for Fionn, and apparently fallen asleep with the dog sprawled over his chest. This was too precious for you, the man was supposed to let you get up all your pent up meanness, not make it feel like your ovaries were about to explode while your heart fluttered wildly. You knelt beside the cubby and crawled on top of them, pressing your lips to Ransom’s forehead and shaking him softly until his eyes fluttered open.

“Hey baby.” You grinned at him when his eyes met yours, brushing his hair out of his face while he blinked at you in confusion. “What’re you doing in here?”

“I felt bad leaving him by himself, so I thought I’d lay next to him until things calmed down.” He winced when he sat up, the dog wagging his tail when he woke up and saw the two of you there. “Guess I fell asleep.”

“Ok, well let’s all go upstairs to bed, hmm?” You pulled him to his feet and helped him straighten out when he stumbled a little bit, Fionn stretching then following after the two of you as you headed up the stairs. “Don’t think sleeping on the laundry room floor is gonna be the best thing for your neck.”

He just grunted softly and started stripping out of his clothes once you reached the master suite, watchin you and Fionn crawl into the bed with a small smile. You purred happily when he finally joined you, the two of you wrapping around each other while the dog curled up at your feet in a picture of domestic bliss that you couldn’t believe didn’t piss you off more.

[thosesillylittlegayghosts]

Episode 4 thoughts

Not Vasiliy seeing mal and Alina kiss THIS IS WHY YOU DONT PUBLICLY KISS YOUR BOYFRIEND WHEN YOUR ENGAGED

Also nikolais mum is really pushing the whole he’s legitimate thing isn’t she

INEJS VOICE BREAKING INTO KAZS FLASHBACK WHERE EARLIER IT WAS JORDIE

I FEEL LIKE WE ARE BUILDING UP TO KAZ IMAGINING INEJS BODY

“It would bring me some comfort to know that you’re with me” my kanej heart is being fed

Kaz just wanting Inej to be safe if he dies versus Inej just wanting to get revenge for Kaz if he dies

The patron Saint of brewers

A LITTLE LIGHT ROLEPLAY

I KINDA LIKE YOUR FACE

SOMETIMES BROTHERS FIGHT

YES TO ALL OF THAT SHUT UP THEYRE BROTHERS

We like to keep our expectations low!

Nina bestie don’t knock out Kaz

Also there’s no way we’re getting a soc spin off for crooked kingdom cause they’re using half the plotline

David’s little wave 😭I love him

Oh god David feels so bad about genya

Whoever I saw on here that called the sword a round of applause for you

So know nikolais gonna hire the crows right?

Mal calling Nikolai out on the third person

Nina bestie stop it. He’s probably just gonna kill you anyway

Can’t really blame Kaz for Nina not being loyal they’ve known each other a week

Yes Inej slay

This is how she’s gonna find her purpose

She’s not gonna get her ship at the end of this season is she? She might

This is when Kaz is gonna bring up his son ain’t it

See they’ve already used the plague thing so we literally cannot get a crooked kingdom spin off

Ahah that where the shiner comes from

Omg no not Jordie already having the plague when the sirens went off

Slay Kaz

OMG YES HIM AND NINA PLANNED IT

NOW I KNOW HOW JESPER AND INEJ FEEL

OMG YES GO KAZ USE HIS SON

Ngl kinda prefer when Kaz didn’t use his name cause then pekka was just being gullible

Calling pekka weak as if he’s not in love with Inej

Also shout out to whoever said Kaz was gonna use alby in every monstrous thing

OMG OMG WE GOT THE SCENE

I CANNOT

Kaz saying all of this with blood running down his face really makes it

THEY LITERALLY LIFTED HALF IT FROM THE BOOKS AND I LOVE THAT

Nina and Jesper just watching this shitshow go down

He better get on his knees

YESSSSS

‘Are you’ I FUCKING LOVE HIM

ngl I kinda forgot they were being framed for murder

Omg yeah the bitch is dead

YESSS GET INEJ FREED TOO

Ok but this means that he didn’t liquidate all his assets to free her

It also means they can’t really do six of crows either cause heleens the one who recognises them at the ice court

Thick as thieves, lol

YES THE KOOPEROM

Where was Inej in that scene with pekka though?

YES TOLYA AND POETRY MY TRUE OTP

Shit okay vasily really wanted rid of mal

Alinas dress looks gorgeous

OMG VASILY NO LEAVE RN

Slay Alina

Bitch you talking a hell of a lot for someone who gets himself killed

Also I forgot vasily proposed 😭

We love Alina wiping her hand on her dress

OMG YES WE GET PEKKA DIGGING WITH HIS HANDS

What’s actually in the grave though

OMG YES THE STADWATCH

Hahahahahaha alby

WESPER

IS JESPER ASKING HIM OUT

OMG THEY ACTUALLY HOOKED UP

NOT WYLAN LOW-KEY SLUT SHAMING JESPER 😭

We better get the just girls scene in a flashback or something

OMG JESPER YES

WYLAN TRYING TO HIDE HIS SMILE

OMFG THEY KISSED!!!!!!

THE SCREECH I JUST LET OUT

OMG THEYRE GONNA KISS

My heart is beating so fucking fast right now

AND OMG RIGHT INTO A KANEJ SCENE?!!

HE THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD

NO KAZ WHAT OH WAIT YEAH BE FREED HER

SHIT

Wait hold up does wylan know about the stablehand?!

I LOVE IT WHEN YOU QUOTE ME

Jesus that is a big rock

NIKOLAI

‘If my mother was as put off by commoners as she claimed I wouldn’t be here now would I?”

Lol vasilys dead

Darkling honestly needs to die already

Genya smashing things as she deserves

I did not expect that to be the context of ‘I’ll destroy the only thing you have left’ and honestly im a bit disappointed she wasn’t threatening him

[dangermousie]

Hello !

I was wondering whether you could rate and tell us of your top 5 favourite webnovels/cnovels of all time ?! (Sorry if this has already been answered lol😅)

Thank you, stay safe and have a nice day🖤

Awww, thank you and that is such a lovely ask!!!

From n1 to n5, here they are (they happen to be all danmei.)

1. The Husky and His White Cat Shizun (2ha) - my n1 forever and ever.

Taxian Jun, the horrific cultivation emperor of the world who razed cities and destroyed sects, is surrounded on his mountain. The righteous sects are terrified to confront him but tired of living, Taxian Jun consumes poison and dies by suicide at the age of 32. And opens his eyes as 16 year old Mo Ran, Mo Ran long before he became Taxian Jun, Mo Ran who is excited at a chance to save the one person he loved and lost. Oh, and to deal with his loathed shizun, the unapproachable and strict Chu Wanning, his past life’s biggest enemy.

I have no idea if it’s objectively the best on this list but it hits every trope I love, its bleak worldview (the world will change only incrementally but that’s enough, average person will not appreciate the sacrifice but it’s still worthwhile, and love is worth everything) mirrors mine, and the sheer complexity of the plot and cascade of plot twists each of which is insane and yet completely logical, is amazing (this is a rare novel where it’s even more fun to reread than read for the first time because you keep seeing all the hints and trail crumbs laid out that you did not see the first time.)

And the characters!!! I mean, this novel has multiple universes/timelines, a side trip to the Underworld AND the demon realm, a plot more twisted than a store’s worth of pretzels and yet the thing that hits me the most are the characters. Mo Ran is my favorite web novel character of all time and I love Chu Wanning so. All the secondary characters are wonderfully written (and some of them made me bawl) and they are all complex. My opinion of all of them changed many times over; the novel doesn’t make it easy to love some of them but then you do and it’s so worthwhile! That slow change is one of the delights of the novel - I started out disliking the unpleasant, superior Chu Wanning and cruel, callow Mo Ran and then I loved them so so hard and cried for them so so hard and was in awe of their heroism and sacrifice and selflessness and capacity to love.

Oh, and the fact that this novel does something almost impossible - it has its protagonist start out as so clearly irredeemable and then slowly and painfully and thoroughly redeems him (without ever letting the reader forget what it is he needs redemption for.)

Also, for a novel that made me cry so hard I felt ill, this book is just so damn funny with the most sarcastic sense of humor imaginable (the serious angst doesn’t even kick in until 90+ chapters!)

Anyway I should stop or I will write a dissertation. But this is the one web novel that I would put in my top 5 not just web novels but any novels in any shape or form. The plentiful trigger warnings are there for a reason so stay away if they are an issue, but if not, if anyone hasn’t read it yet, what are you doing with your life?!

2. Stains of Filth (Yuwu) - another novel by the author of 2ha. Clearly she just pushes all my buttons every time. This one is much shorter and has a plot that is twisty but less twisty than 2ha. Still, all that means is that intensity and the pain are more concentrated.

Aristocratic Mo Xi and former slave Gu Mang were both legendary generals of the empire and lovers. But Gu Mang betrayed the country and switched to the enemy. Now he is back as a peace offering by that country and Mo Xi has to deal with the fact that his feelings are as strong as ever.

This novel!!! So much pain and intensity!!! So many amazing plot twists and supporting characters. The same bleak world view, the same unjust society, the same protagonists doing right things despite the cost. Mo Xi’s intensity and inability to let go (he’s imprinted on Gu Mang and that’s it) is romantic, bone-shakingly intense, and tragic all at once. And oh Gu Mang! So many times I just wanted to reach into the book physically to protect him. The novel deals with unjust societies, memory versus personality, what it’s like to be good in a bad universe etc. And it both made me sob and giggle, repeatedly, and sold me on literally death-defying (but not honor-defying!) love.

Oh, and special shout out to the fact that like 2ha, you may start out hating some characters and end up a rabid fangirl (cough Murong Lian!)

3. Qiang Jin Jiu - a dense political tome that takes a while to get going but then it’s a runaway train.

In a fictional dynasty, Shen Zechuan, the only remaining son of a disgraced aristocratic family and Xiao Chiye, the younger son of a family of generals guarding the border join forces (and then something else) to get power and pull down the dysfunctional system.

This is so elegant and smart (a rare web novel I’d recommend to anyone who just loves solid period fiction) and you probably need a notebook to keep track of the politics and military strategy. These characters are very very smart not just because the author says so.

As to the characters, there is a large cast and I love many of them, but for me the novel is made by Shen Zechuan and Xiao Chiye. SZC is gorgeous and delicate and icy and can kill you before you have time to blink. Saddled with the sins of the family he had no pleasant interaction with, he claws his way out of hell (seeing the sinkhole he was trapped in, literally as well) to take down those who wronged him but also to amass power so all the tragedy and corruption won’t happen again and the whole rotten system comes crashing down. XCY is a military genius who is trapped as a hostage in the capital because the court doesn’t trust his family. He longs to return to the plains of home and to take his rightful place. The two men start out as bitter enemies, then reluctant and sniping allies, then as friends and eventually as one of the most gorgeous, tender, swoony OTPs.

Anyway this is one is a bona fide masterpiece, equal parts smart and emotionally intense.

4. Wu Chang Jie - are you an emotional vampire? I am and this novel is a banquet.

In a highly fantastical setting, we meet our protagonists - the sunny Xie Bian and the intense and surly Fan Wushe. Xie Bian is a human who assists his master in conveying souls to the underworld and making sure no mishaps happen. Bian is concentrated sunshine in human form and to meet him is to love him. When the novel opens, his drunk master brings back another human to be his shidi and assist with duties - said human is uncommunicative, intense and surly Wushe. Bian is excited to have a shidi but little does he know that a story dealing with the horrors of past lifetime is about to start.

Anyway, why WCJ? So many reasons. It has such a dark bleak worldview - this world is a horrifying system where powerful cannibalize each other’s cores for an impossible chance to ascend, where gods have sealed off their realm and all that’s left is neverending human misery and hell (the only way you’d see a deity is if they’d been sent down to suffer over and over and over), where even reincarnation doesn’t fix things and bad acts are often unpunished. And the novel then asks - is it worth being a good person in such a world? More, is it worth being a good person in such a world when nothing good has ever happened to you and you have been repeatedly betrayed due to your goodness? And the answer, on Bian’s part, is an uncompromising yes.

Ah yes, the other reason to love this novel - the protagonists and their fucked up fucked up relationship. Bian (who was Prince Ziheng in the past life) is so genuinely good. But he is that rare thing - good but not saintly, noble but not cloying. So much of the novel is his getting taken apart over and over and barely able to put himself back together every time but his soul is still as amazing as ever.

And then there is Wushe (who was Prince Zixiao in past life, Ziheng’s not-bio-related brother.) Wushe is not a good person. He is a monster. And he loves Bian/Ziheng more than his life and his soul and the entire world but he’s also the one who hurt him more than anyone else ever could and did it over and over. His love survived a literal century of torture in the worst kind of hell and refused the usual memory loss of new life. But it also humiliated and broke Ziheng down to his constituent parts.

One of the things that is so fascinating to me about this novel is the question of what can be forgiven/what should be forgiven/what kind of expiation is enough/can you ever love someone who you loved so much and then he hurt you so badly and is now repentant? And it never sweeps trauma under the rug or hand waves it away but deals with it head on.

If you want healthy relationships, you should stay far away from this novel but if intense insane ones with a feral barely human one capable of destroying the world leashed by love and guilt to the sane deeply good one is your bag, come right in.

There is also the world building and the fact that yes, the big fall out between Ziheng x Zixiao is based on not knowing all the facts but it’s not “why can’t you talk?! This is dumb!” But is totally in keeping with both events and their characters. It’s reasonable for Ziheng to do what he does and for Zixiao to misunderstand and decide Ziheng is now his biggest enemy (but still one he’s fixated on) and for Ziheng to never be able to clarify.

Anyway, once again this is trigger warning central so please heed those, but if they are no issue, this one is wonderful.

5. OK, this is hard and switches between Sha Po Lang, Heaven Official’s Blessing and The Golden Stage depending on my mood. So what the hell, I am gonna write about all of them.

Sha Po Lang - so smart and so much clever world building. There is enough politicking to satisfy a Qiang Jin Jiu fan, it’s steampunk, and our two protagonists - Gu Yun, the empire’s most powerful general, who’s loyal to the empire despite being badly wronged by it, and Chang Geng, a cursed prince with barbarian blood and horrifying childhood - are wonderful separately and together. This is a huge slow burn but it’s totally worth it! They fall in love with each other’s hearts and brains and ability as much as anything. (Yes, this is the one with the yifu thing. Gu Yun is made Chang Geng’s foster father when he rescues him and brings him back to the capital as a way to keep CG safe in imperial strife. They are 12 and 19 at the time so clearly it’s never a parental relationship.)

Heaven Official’s Blessing (TCGF) - I love it’s sprawling narrative and cast, I love its inventive setting and picaresque story. It’s hilarious and can make me cry. But the novel’s place on this list is due to Xie Lian who is part Kenshin part drama WWX part pure goodness wrapped in heartbreak and trauma wrapped in sunshine.

The Golden Stage - two smart and principled (yes, they both have principles different though they may be) men navigate their arranged marriage, their past friendship and their past break up, become a super couple (one of the healthiest danmei couples I’ve ever read and proves healthy doesn’t have to be boring), save the country and bring down the emperor or two and just generally this is my rainy day book.

I guess I didn’t write as much for the three n5 candidates as I did for 1-4 but my brain is beginning to curdle so...

[lordmomohismomoness]

As of late, I have been obsessed with Webtoons. So I figured it was time to make a rec list of my favorites! Though, I couldn't narrow it down to 10, so here are my top 29! In no particular order:

Kind of Confidential by Vivian Darlin

Romance/Superhero updates weekly

-a superhero loses his powers and is saved by a supervillain on the run. Zen and Rena are my OTP and Batcat is adorable

The Witch and the Bull by Moonsia

Romance/Fantasy/Adventure updates weekly

-an a-hole who hates witches gets cursed as a bull, whose only hope is the witch whose career he just ruined

Ghost Wife by Sejung

Romance/Horror completed

-she is constantly followed by ghosts. But she does have a powerful but unsocialized demon to protect her. Bonus! This one has a sequel that just premiered!

I Love Yoo by Quimchee

Drama updates weekly

-she is a loner and down on her luck. When she meets two brothers who are complete opposites, her luck gets even worse. But at least she's not alone

The Kiss Bet by Ingrid Ochoa

Romance/Drama on hiatus

-all she wants is a special first kiss, but a little bet and some new transfer students make it really complicated

The Red Archer by IsabelleRanson

Romance/Adventure/Historical updates weekly

-a mashup of history and adventure, it's Maid Marian's turn to be a badass

The Makeup Remover by Lee Yone

Drama/Romance updates twice weekly

-after becoming a model in a make up competition, she shakes things up with some social commentary

Lore Olympus by Rachel Smythe

Romance/Fantasy updates weekly

-Hades and Persephone just want to be happy. But their family is less "The Tanners" and more "Jerry Springer'

Like Wind on a Dry Branch by Dalsaeowl/Hwaeum

Drama/Romance updates weekly

-after losing everything to a plague, she starts her life over as a mage in the prince's harem. Heartwarming friendships and ugly crying included

Let's Play Mongie

Romance/Drama updates weekly

-the person that ruined her career is her new neighbor, and her love life just went from 0 to complicated

Future You by Kumokayaa

Romance/Fantasy updates once a month

-she's a time traveling assassin with no way back home, and he is a cop investigating her company. What could go wrong?

Cape of Spirits by Kris Nguyen

Fantasy/Adventure completed

-an ex prince joins his kidnappers in order to stop the spirits from destroying the world

Subzero by Junepurr

Romance/Fantasy updates weekly

-the princess and last of the azure dragons agrees to marry the prince of the crimson dragons as part of a peace treaty to end the war. But there is a lot more going on in the kingdom than meets the eye, and she has secrets of her own

Tower of God by SIU

Fantasy/Adventure updates weekly

-he climbs the tower to find a girl, but his very existence threatens the hierarchy within. This one is really long, but also AMAZING and addictive

Lumine by Emma Krogell

Fantasy updates weekly

-an orphaned werewolf is hired as a bodyguard to a standoffish witch. What they both really need is friendship

Nice to Meet You by Wishroomness

Romance/Drama updates weekly

-what starts off as an innocent prank turns into a wild romance

Little Mizzi Muffett and the Spider King by Catfish

Horror updates once a month

-something dark and evil is stirring, and she is the only one that can stop it. With the help of the spider king who has decided to make her his bride

Freaking Romance by Snailords

Romance/Sci Fi completed

-an interdimensional bisexual love triangle. Need I say more?

The Rose Prince by Samuraiflame

Romance updates twice a month

-after her twin brother's death, she takes his name and persona so that the kingdom can still pass on to her. However, the neighboring king sees right through her disguise

Siren's Lament by instantmiso

Romance/Fantasy completed

-she is stuck, half siren and half human. Now she must find a way to break the curse before she loses everything and everyone she loves

My Magical Maid by J_hp

Fantasy/Romance updates twice a month

-a witch lives in secret as the physician of the king...who hates witches

Shadow Bride by Sae In Lee/Soo Bean Lim

Romance/Fantasy updates weekly

-this one just started, but it is off to a great start: a beautiful thief who is barely getting by catches the attention of an awkward prince who is the true heir to the throne

Villain to Kill by Fupin/Enuji

Action updates weekly

-another new one. A hero gets reborn... as a villain. Now he is is trying to take down those that killed him, without losing his mind or bringing the apocalypse first

A Good Day to be a Dog by Lee Hey

Romance complete

-the only way to break her curse of turning into a dog is to get a kiss while transformed. Which would be a lot easier if the person she needs to kiss wasn't terrified of dogs

The Spectrum of Us by Sen-Chan

Drama/Romance updates weekly

-a cat in love with a wolf is complicated enough without throwing the cops, the mafia, and a tiger in the mix. Also keep an eye out for her other work Cat vs Dog which will premiere on originals soon!

My Roommate is a Gumiho by NA

Romance updates twice weekly

-after accidentally swallowing his bead, a college student moves in with a strict 900 year old fox so they can find a way to safely remove it. Hijinks ensue

That Awkward Magic by SomeBunny

Romance updates three times a month

-the jock and the loner agree to fake a relationship, and it takes the school by storm. But also, yer a wizard harry

Or: two dorks in love, but one is having a gay crisis and one is having a witch crisis

Eleceed by Jeho Son/ZHENA

Action updates weekly

-a secret agent gets stuck in the body of a fat cat and decides to mentor an optimistic kid with super speed. Wholesome, action packed, and hilarious

Act Like You Love Me! by XUANN

Romance updates weekly

-three people know each other but don't know that they know each other. It's gonna be fun when they figure it out

Great, my OCD says I'm not allowed to have 29 recs and must make it 30. But there are five I am torn between adding. We'll go with:

My Grim Romance by Gears of Rain

Romance updates every two weeks

-instead of dying, she gets a new roommate - in the form of a dramatic grim reaper who lost his powers

[laylamva]

Miitopia Nuzlocke!

Okay, so I’d been doing a Miitopia Nuzlocke for a month and decided to chronicle it. Spoilers…I didn’t make it. 

Rules

If a Mii falls in battle, they’re gone for good (Unless it’s the protagonist).

I will only use the Life Sprinkle on the protagonist.

If the whole party falls in the same battle, everyone will still be counted as alive.

If a Mii is resurrected by another party member, they will be counted as alive.

If the dead Miis cost us the final boss, only then will I go back to level them up.

When a Mii dies, I will change their hair color to white, their eye color to black, and rename them “Spooky Ghost” to keep track of who I’ve lost (and also to make me feel better about sentencing my beloveds to death).

I will draw random characters from Mii Maker for every major character and decide party jobs by spinning a wheel.

The Nuzlocke ends after the main story. I cannot bring myself to care about the post-game.

If the protagonist dies on their own, the Nuzlocke is aborted.

Sabrina Raincomprix is protag/safe gorl.

WALUIGI x TEMMIE OTP (they’re the lovey-dovey couple)

Sassy Child Elmo pretending to be a dragon foreshadows Dominic.

Lenny

Dark Lord Chloé Bourgeois is fun to voice

Sabrina’s a chef.

Simone Soleil! Male Pop Star.

Before you look him up, Simone’s an OC. I put an OC in here. Help.

Every time I have played this game with Spotpass on, the freaking blobfish Mii always weasels its way in! (It’s the Nintendo Fangirl)

Got the new Zelda amiibo. Wonder if it’ll give me a costume?

IT DID!

I changed Sabrina’s eyebrows to match the Zelda wig…she looks exactly like me.

Leon Kuwata, Ultimate Mage AU

AU where Genocider Syo is a good guy who unkills people

I almost lost the Danganronpa characters, but we lost the fight.

Simone’s dead. But it’s okay, because he’s a spooky ghost.

I actually made up a “Farm Upstate” story to make myself feel better about Miis dying. “They’re not dead, they just turned into ghosts because of a cosmic paradox and can’t leave the inn as a side effect!”

Leon is at war with the moles. And also Sabrina, apparently.

On a related note, Sabrina Raincomprix and Genocider Syo BroTP???

I made Teruteru Hanamura the King. If you’ve seen all his Free Time Events, the calming fruit mission hits different.

And Sonia Nevermind is the princess. Can you tell what my current hyperfocus is?

Why does the wheel keep giving me Pop Star things? Simone’s been dead for three sessions it’s time to move on—

General Sonia killed Leon and Syo. My entire first party is DEAD.

Sabrina’s a warrior now.

Maya Aida from Glitter Force Doki Doki is my Imp.

One time when I was playing this game, I tried making a Starlow Mii from scratch, but then I realized it looked like someone different. Someone better. And now it’s all come full circle as Tonker Bell joins us as the Airheaded Cat!

Sabrina just got the Bee Armor. Suck it, Chloé!

Genie of the Lamp The Master World’s End Club

Homura Akemi as the Dancing Guide? Imagine Homura being happy.

Steve from Blue’s Clues: The Kind Thief

Steve and Tonker Bell BroTP!

tonker bell just died.

If we’re going with the “Sabrina dumped Chloé” narrative, I feel like even with two kind party members, Sabrina would keep chanting until the genie was sealed again.

Crap I bought Tonker Bell something

I LOOK AWAY FOR ONE SECOND AND NOW MAYA’S DEAD OH GOD—

Steve’s the only one left.

Ugh, scratch that.

OK, Sabrina’s on her own. If she dies, game over.

Why am I listening to Dodie music while I’m doing this? It’s making this sadder.

WHY IS MY FIRST FIGHT ALONE AGAINST HOMURA???

AND SHE’S A PAINTING I’M BONED—

I lost. The Nuzlocke is over. RIP.

So…yeah. I plan on doing this again on the Switch later, but that’s gonna go on YouTube…as soon as I can figure out how my capture card works. BTW, “Spooky Ghost” didn’t fit in the text box for Mii names, so here’s what I named them instead:

Simone: Sun Ghost

Tonker Bell: Disbelief

Maya: AngelHeart

Steve: At College

Syo and Leon were taken away before I could give them ghost names, but if I did, they would’ve been called 11037 and Genocided. And I didn’t name Ghost Sabrina because the Nuzlocke ended. But, hypothetically…Vanisher.

[beware-of-you-98]

OTP Prompts for Jemily

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Who kills the bugs?

JJ (she grew up in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania, she’s not scared of any sort of bug)

Emily doesn’t deal with creatures with more than four legs, so if she sees an insect, or lord forbid, a spider, she’ll immediately climb off the floor and call for her girlfriend

JJ can never find it in herself to purposely kill the insects (she’s also not too keen on having to clean bug guts from her carpet), so she’ll grab a clear plastic cup with whatever book or piece of paper is laying around and use those to put the bug outside

(If it’s a wolf spider, she’ll literally pick it up with her bare hands, much to Emily’s horror)

If the spider is a brown recluse or black widow, she’ll bring the covered arachnid closer and take the time to show her boys and Emily what markings to look out for so that they know to be careful

The only insect she refuses to deal with are stink bugs

When they come around, she and Emily take an emergency trip to the nearby Target and buy enough of the raspberry gel air fresheners for every one of their windows

Yeah, their house smells like a Jolly Rancher for the entire month

But at least they don’t have to deal with the annoying beetles

Who always gets hot? Who always gets cold?

Neither of them gets hot, but Emily is perpetually cold

The rest of the team will be in the field in pants and short sleeves while Emily is bundled in her turtlenecks and jacket

Even in 90°+ weather, Emily can sit comfortably in long sleeve shirts and pants

At first, JJ is surprised by how cold Emily can get

She wakes up one day to find Emily bundled under the covers and shivering

Of course, she’s alarmed and asking what’s wrong, only getting confused when Emily says she’s fine, just cold

“Em, it’s 76° outside.” “That’s practically freezing!”

JJ starts giving Emily her sweaters and sweatshirts for her to wear

Emily loves them so much because they fit her just the way she likes and they smell like her girlfriend

Who’s the big spoon? Who’s the little spoon?

Everyone on the team hands down swears Emily’s the big spoon

It’s not only because she’s taller than JJ, but Penelope says she gives big spoon vibes

(Actually, she says Emily gives huge top vibes and that makes her the big spoon by default)

JJ lets the team think whatever they want because she’s the only one that really knows Emily Prentiss is the ultimate little spoon

She can’t help it!! She loves the feeling of being wrapped up in JJ’s arms

And loves getting her hair played with while she rests her head on JJ’s chest

She’s!! Soft!! When!! It!! Comes!! To!! Jennifer!! Jareau!!

When did they realize they loved each other?

For JJ, she realized in the aftermath of the Tobias Hankel case

She suffered from horrific nightmares for weeks and never got enough sleep

Emily comes over every night for three weeks and holds JJ in her arms and comforts her when she wakes up screaming from her nightmares

JJ realizes she’s in love with Emily one night after she’s calmed down from yet another nightmare

She’s laying there in Emily’s arms, emotionally drained and exhausted and she just peers up at Emily and... knows

No one had ever cared for her like this, no one had ever made her feel so calm, so safe in years.

Emily does.

Emily makes her feel like no one has before, like she’s the only person to ever exist and matter.

JJ feels as if Emily’s arms is where she’s meant to spend her life

She doesn’t know it then, but that was the moment she fell in love with Emily. And she fell hard.

Emily knew almost right away tbh

It’s only a few weeks after she joins the BAU and everyone else had gone home except for herself and JJ

She goes into JJ’s office to keep her company

They spend the next few hours organizing files (Emily insists on helping because JJ looks really stressed and overwhelmed)

They don’t get a lot of work done honestly, they sit and talk with each other over mugs of steaming chamomile tea

Emily looks across the desk at JJ as she finishes a story and is rendered speechless by how beautiful the blonde is and how perfect she is and how everything about her makes Emily feel as if nothing else matters

She’s overwhelmed with her own emtion and just knows, knows, at that moment she’s well and truly fucked because she’s in love

Who said “I love you�� first?

Emily does but it’s spontaneous and out of the blue

The whole team is hanging out at Rossi’s house

Everyone is laughing and having a good time

Emily and JJ are attempting to dance to the music playing over the speakers but they’re both hilariously uncoordinated

(They’ve also both had a couple of glasses of wine at this point, making their efforts even more comical)

Spencer and Hotch are playing a game of blackjack

Derek is half paying attention to the game on tv, half swaying to the music and doing weird dances when Penelope looks at him to make her laugh

Penelope is recording different parts of the night for the memories

Rossi sits back and watches over his children with a content smile

JJ stumbles into Emily’s arms with a giggle

Emily laughs and wraps her arms around the her blonde and just goes “God, do I love you.”

You can hear a pin drop with how quiet everyone becomes

Emily opens her mouth to apologize, to weakly defend herself when JJ grins up at her “Do you mean it?”

Emily’s response is a small, shy smile

“Say it again.”

Emily then leans in and gives JJ a light kiss and says more genuinely “I love you.”

JJ beams up at her and repeats the words, wrapping her arms around Emily’s neck and pulls her down for a deep kiss

(The team all give out a celebratory whoop at the couple’s expense and Penelope cries because she’s so happy for her friends)

(She sends the video to the two later on for them to have)

(It’s their most treasured memory)

Who demands cuddles?

When sober? Emily

Emily Prentiss loves a good cuddle

And, hey, after a day of dealing with the horrors they experience daily, a cuddle is what they both need and deserve

Drunk JJ is clingy as hell and will literally pout up at Emily until the older woman cuddles her

It doesn’t matter where they are

If they are in the middle of Wendy’s, drunk JJ will pout to her heart’s desire until she gets her cuddles (and a vanilla frosty, but that’s besides the point)

Drunk JJ actually demands cuddles

Who is more prone to stealing the other’s clothes?

While JJ gives Emily her clothes to wear, she is 100% the one that steals Emily’s clothes

She steals Emily’s hoodies all the time

If she can’t find something to wear for work in her side of the closet, she’ll steal a shirt from Emily’s

She also loves to steal Emily’s pantsuits and wear those to work sometimes

They’re so much more comfortable than skirts

And Emily loves to see her in them, so that’s a bonus

(She also steals Emily’s flannels before they go out for dates)

She just loves wearing Emily’s clothes as much as Emily loves to wear her’s

When do they tell their team/their families about their relationship? What are their reactions?

They decide to tell the team after five months that they’ve been dating

They want them to know because the team is like their secondary family

(And they also want to be able to publically be with each other when the team get together at Rossi’s)

(JJ just wants to hold Emily’s hand and give her girlfriend a kiss whenever she wants god dammit!)

To both of their relief, the team’s response is overwhelmingly positive

No one is surprised when they confirm to the team they’re dating

Hotch and Rossi are just like “we knew it”

Penelope has to remind both of them that she already knew because JJ had given Emily a kiss a few weeks ago during girl’s night (Penelope can keep a secret if she really wants to)

Spencer is confused because “Wait, you mean you guys have only just recently become a thing? You haven’t been dating for the past year and a half?”

Derek is just like “Well it’s about fucking time”

JJ takes Emily with her when she takes a weekend trip to take her boys home to visit her mom

She really wants Emily to formally meet her mom (“I know you already met her, but I want her to meet you as my girlfriend!”)

Though initially slightly surprised by JJ introducing Emily as her girlfriend, the blonde’s mother welcomes Emily with open arms

She’s never seen JJ this happy in years and it warms her heart to see her daughter in good hands

(“And she’s really good with the kids,” JJ’s mother tells her daughter later on in the night as the two watch Emily and the boys out in the backyard)

JJ just smiles warmly in response, relieved by her mother’s response

Ambassador Prentiss comes over to Emily’s apartment unannounced while JJ and the boys are having a family movie night

It’s awkward as hell tbh

Emily’s too formal and on edge

JJ longs to go over and place a hand on Emily’s arm for comfort, but stays put under the Ambassador’s steely gaze

(Michael and Henry are blissfully unaware, sucked too far into the animated universe of Spider-Man)

Finally, the Ambassador turns to Emily and asks if she’s happy

Emily turns back to JJ and the boys with a soft gaze before turning back to her mother and giving a light nod “Yeah. I am.”

“Then that’s all that matters.”

All the tension falls from Emily’s shoulders and the biggest breath of relief leaves her lips at that

It’s the most approval she’s gotten from her mother in a long time but it means so much

What is their favorite way to show affection?

Emily likes to wrap her arms around JJ’s waist from behind

She loves to sneak up behind her when she’s cooking and gently grab her waist and press a light kiss against her neck before laying her chin on the blonde’s shoulder and watching her cook

She’ll slide behind JJ on the couch and kiss her temple before they cuddle and watch tv

She’ll randomly stop by and just wrap JJ in a soft, warm hug, gently swaying her from side to side before letting her go and going about her day like normal

JJ loves giving Emily sweet kisses on her forehead or her cheek

She wakes up before Emily and will sometimes be unable to help herself and just lean down and press a series of light kisses on the brunette’s nose or forehead

She’ll sometimes stop by Emily’s office during work and just plant a kiss on the crown of her head before heading back to her reports

When they go on long trips, who drives?

JJ!!

She loves to drive but hardly ever gets to

At work, Emily or one of the boys are the ones driving the SUVs

(And, yeah, maybe she got to drive the SUV when Kate was on the team, but still)

Even running errands like going to the store or picking up the boys, it’s Emily that drives

But Emily hates to drive long distances and often leaves that task to JJ

JJ loves it

Emily will lean her head on her shoulder or place her hand over the blonde’s on the gear shift

It’s so blissfully domestic and soft and makes the drive that much better

Who shows more affection to the other in public?

JJ easily

Emily is a firm believer that she has a hardass reputation to uphold

It takes all of JJ’s will power not to snort

Because, honestly, Emily is really just a big softie

But she’ll let Emily think what she wants

She’s the one that initiates hand holding on the jet when they’re going to a case and cuddles on the way home from one

She just wants to love her girlfriend anywhere and at anytime!

If she wants to give Emily a kiss in the middle of the bullpen (when it’s slow and the atmosphere isn’t as tense or serious as it normally is, of course), she will god dammit!!

(Emily’s light blush never does any good to help uphold her “hardass reputation” but oh well)

Who gives piggy back rides the most?

JJ gives the piggy back rides, Emily always gets them

JJ holds her as if she weighs nothing and it makes her swoon

JJ’s arms? A definite weakness for Emily

(Plus she never got to have piggy back rides as a child and JJ insists on making up for lost time so how can Emily refuse with an offer like that?)

Who proposes first? How and when?

Okay so I’m a firm believer that they’re both spontaneous as hell when it comes to this kind of thing

It’s literally just a matter of who lets their guard down first and let the question slip out first

If it’s JJ, it’s when she comes down one morning to see Emily and the boys making her breakfast

She just stops and leans in the doorway, smiling to herself as her girlfriend instructs her sons what do do

Emily is so patient with them

She helps Michael crack the eggs into a bowl and then kisses his nose, which makes him squeal in delight and her to grin

Henry stirs the batter for waffles and gets flour on his glasses and face

Emily leans over and gently cleans him off, grinning and laughing in surprise when the young boy gets batter on her nose

The three of them are just laughing and genuinely having a good time and, god, it makes JJ’s heart feel so full

When they finally notice JJ in the doorway, the boys run up and give her good morning kisses before going back to cooking breakfast

When JJ and Emily are alone and cleaning up the kitchen, Emily just wraps her arms around JJ’s waist and gives her the softest of kisses

The “marry me?” slips from JJ’s lips without much thought

And Emily, though initially surprised, just beams in response and gives her girlfriend (fiancé?) a deep, passionate kiss and just goes “just let me know the date to reserve, baby”

If it’s Emily, it happens in a very soft, very intimate moment between the two of them

They’ll be laying in bed at midnight, cuddled naked under the covers with no space between them

Emily leans over and brushes her fingers through JJ’s long hair, her heart fluttering wildly when the blonde looks up at her

Her eyes are full of so much love, her expression so soft and adoring, Emily can’t help but to whisper out “marry me?” into the room

She goes to maybe to start a speech about their relationship, how much it means to her and how much she wants to be a part of JJ’s and the boys’ lives but all that comes out is “I just... I really, really love you and want to be a part of your life permanently.”

Just like the first time they admitted they loved each other, JJ beams and leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to Emily’s lips before telling her to say it again

Emily presses a kiss to JJ’s chin and asks again so softly “marry me?”

JJ pulls her in for a long, deep kiss

“I’d marry you as soon as tomorrow if you wanted me to.”

[villainsandvictimsalliance]

asked a million times, will ask another million again: shigadabi for the ship meme!

LET'S GO SHIGADABI NATION. THIS IS A QUESTION I'LL NEVER STOP ANSWERING. SO SEND IT AS MANY TIMES AS YOU WANT.

You guys know why I love this ship? This is god material, ladies and gentlemen and my fellow nb friends. This is "against the odds, even after all the suffering and the trauma we've been through, here we are. Two lost boys in the hands of fortune and fate".

This is the ship that keeps happening in every alternative universe. Somehow, they find they're way to each other time and time again. Their real identities and their current identities are intertwined, so there's no scape. The more they try to get away, the more they fall into the other.

And I'm gonna put the cut in here because this is going to be a long one with spoilers from the manga, so let's enjoy the ride.

Tenko had black hair, red eyes. Touya had red hair (it became white later) with blue eyes. After going through their respective traumas, they changed. Shimura Tenko, now Shigaraki Tomura, got his hair blue and later white. Todoroki Touya, now Dabi, dyed his hair black.

Let's start with Shimura Tenko and Todoroki Touya, shall we?

Do you see where I want to go? They share the color palette. No? Still aren't you convinced? Well, mix white and black, mix red and blue, and you're going to obtain gray and purple, the other two colors that Shigaraki and Dabi share.

They both come from notorious hero families with money. They both had siblings, siblings that didn't protect them because it was not their jobs to do so. Siblings that would do anything to mend it. Mothers that failed them by not being able to get them out of their abusive houses, fathers that broken them so much, they still have flashbacks.

They even wear a sort of parody of their families hero costumes. Dabi's sacrs are a parallel of Endeavor's suit and Shigaraki's outfit when he got All For One was a parallel to Nana Shimura's suit too.

They both have their own arcs, being two of the most important arcs in the manga when it comes to the falling of Hero Society. They're respectively calling out the two best heroes on Japan, pointing out how fake they are. Yes, you can look for it in the manga, there's a parallel between Endeavor and All Might, because they've failed Touya and Tenko and they almost broke Izuku and Shoto.

If you ship TodoDeku, let me tell you some news: Dabi and Shigaraki are their parallels. They share the same story, but the difference is that Shoto and Izuku found someone to rescue them and had friends. Tenko and Dabi were abandoned and isolated from society.

And yes, in the manga, it is clear that Izuku wants to save Shigaraki as much as Shoto wants to save Dabi. Because they understand.

Shigaraki and Dabi are not in a mental state to ask for help and they won't. Who are they going to ask for help anyway? The same society that failed them and turned them into villians and tried to killed them every time? Denying their voices and arguments and identities?

So yes, their speech is pretty similar.

Shigaraki says "this society is corrupted and doesn't work so we need to take it down in order to rebuild it from zero". He doesn't want to be the supreme leader, like AFO. Anyone can do as they please in the new world. He just doesn't want no more corruptelas people in positions of power claiming they're heroes or saints.

Dabi instead, explains that there are no real heroes. Not even one. Shigaraki just wants to live, he's tired and he wants to live. Dabi doesn't. He's suicidal, he wants to make his father pay and then he can die in peace. He wants to show them all that he once believe in heroes and in his father above them all, but they failed him. They're incapable of doing what they say their gonna do. They can't protect them.

Shigaraki and Dabi both feel helpless. They are desperate for some control, just like every victim of abuse is. They want people to acknowledge the things the hero society did to them, to say that their hurt is valid.

And that's exactly why this ship is for me one of the best ships in the whole bnha / mha world.

The things they've gone through are things that cannot be explained. Not even Hawks can understand completely the type of hurt Shigaraki and Dabi has gone through. A cut só deep they can't forget or forgive. They have said it. They can't forget. They can't forgive. Not matter what people tells them, they're trapped in their memories, in the loop of the feelings of the moment when it all fell apart.

But they don't have to explain themselves when they're together. Dabi can say "none of the recruits were worth it" and Shigaraki doesn't ask. Shigaraki can tell part of his story and Dabi won't even blink. They have this agreement: we say what we want to say, we do what we want to do, we use each other to reach our goals, but we don't ask, we don't ask for something we're not ready to give.

When you've been through a lot, sometimes you find comfort in being with someone that doesn't demand you stuff. You can let your guard down because you don't have to take care of them. If you hurt them, well, they knew you were dangerous, right? And they don't interact with you with pity or sorrow or like if you were made of glass. You're equals. You don't need any of that bullshit.

In the meantime, you start feeling comfortable. No restrictions, no rules, no expectations. So you are just... Yourself. And you don't feel the need to destroy as much as before because there's no one making you angry. There's no one making you sad. You can go and argue with him for a little but... It's pointless. You're comfortable around him. He makes you feel... Safe, maybe?

And then shit's go down. Because you start to laugh when you want to laugh and you start to relax and be more friendly. And he does the same, because you two are not trying to impress anybody. You don't care if you're gross, he doesn't care if he's mean. You two know the worst the other can do, so it's not like someone can point the worst in them to make you change your mind. You've already know it.

The surprise comes when he starts showing his best side and you do the same. Oh boy, oh boy, that's dangerous. Even more dangerous than his hands when they're ready to kill, are his eyes when his looking at you across the room and they're glowing. Why are they glowing. Way are they looking at you like that. Why he is suddenly calling your name and you are feeling weird. It's not annoyance. It's... It's something else.

And if they ever tell each other the full truth about their pasts, well, the bond will only get deeper.

That's the funny part. I see Shigaraki as a demisexual and Dabi as a demiromantic. That means, Shigaraki doesn't feel sexual attraction unless he has a deep bond with someone and Dabi doesn't feel romantic attraction until he is close to someone in a feeling-mind type of way.

That means that Dabi is making Shigaraki explore his sexuality and Dabi is falling in love with Shigaraki AND THEY HATE IT. NO. They hate the idea of being vulnerable around the other but it makes sense. They hate that fact even more. They hate that it's only getting better and they're only getting closer. They hate the fact that they can read each other minds so easily or understand the other with few words between them. They are becoming predictable. They're getting frustrated.

And with frustration comes the sexual tension. Oops. And with the sexual activities, comes the vulnerable moments and the confessions. They're getting intimate. And it's too late to pretend that it's not happening.

Now I need to apologize for ranting for so long about them. But I told you all. I told you guys. This is my otp. I have Shigadabi brainrot. It's terminal.

What's the point of saying they are my 10/10, fav ship in the fandom, if I already wrote this much. Dear @viruscide, look what you've done. I hope you're proud and I hope you enjoy my spiral into insanity.

[the-bee-graveyard]

The Fine Line

Chapter Two

Hello! So this is my first chapter fic. It’s a Newt's and Brendresa fic (I’m hoping to write a Kitty one soon, sorry for my neglect to the TDA fandom recently) so um yeah I hope you like it

Sorry for any misspellings/grammar errors I did proofread, but I’m super inattentive so I probably missed stuff.

WARNING: Major Spoilers for The Death Cure

Story Summary: Newt and Teresa both survive the destruction of the last city and are brought to the safe haven with all their friends. Newt is welcomed back with open arms, and most people learn to forgive Teresa, all but the one person she wants to forgive her the most. Oblivious!Newtmas and Enemies-to-lovers!Brendresa. Minho and Sonya are sick of their friend’s being stupid. A little bit of Soniet and Mingally because I’m weak for them. Sonya and Minho are an unexpected Brotp I now can’t live without. Might actually be even more chaotic than my last fic. Combining movie and book logic because I feel like it. Pining because I said so. I might make a playlist for this fic because I like playlists.

Chapter Summary: both Teresa and Newt unexpectedly wake up in the safe haven, and Minho and Sonya don’t even give them time to catch their breaths because they’ve spotted their OTP’s and they won’t stop until they get them together. 

Chapter One: Fine Line Between Love and Hate

Part One: Teresa’s POV

Teresa used to think she knew everything. She’d been told so by many people. Those same people fed her so many lies, but it took her long to figure out that was one of them, maybe because that was the only lie she’d ever truly believed down deep in her heart. Thomas used to say she knew everything too, and maybe once he stopped believing that she did too. No matter the cause, she  now knew that there were a lot of things she didn’t know, but she did know this one thing:

She was supposed to be dead.

The last thing she remembered were the walls of her lab in the last city coming down on her. She saw a large chunk of concrete hit Janson right in the face right before she hit her head on the floor and blacked out . She could assume the rest of the building went down shortly after that. That was the end of her life, right?

So you could imagine her confusion when she woke up in a cot, not in hell.

“Great, you’re alive,” A sarcastic voice said from beside her bed. She’d recognize that voice anywhere, it had plagued her dreams and nightmares for months in the last city, for reasons Teresa didn’t understand. But now the voice was more than just a nightmare. She’d assume she’d actually woken up in hell, but the person who spoke hadn’t died and sure as heck would not have ended up in hell. They were everything Teresa could not be, and for the longest time Teresa had hated them for it.

“Brenda,” Teresa gasped. She sat up, pushing the blankets off herself and swinging her legs over the bed. As soon as she lifted her head off the pillow she regretted it, her head pounding. Brenda sat on a stool next to the bed, her legs crossed, looking bored. Teresa must have flinched from the pain or something since Brenda threw her an ice pack.

“Concussion, you hit your head pretty badly back in the last city. When Minho and I got you out of there we thought you might be already dead. The medic’s say you’ll make a full recovery, you’ve just got to take it easy for a few weeks,” Brenda explained. Brenda looked different since the last time she’d seen her. She’d cut her hair again, not as short as she had it when the two first met, but shorter than it was when Brenda and all of Teresa’s former friends kidnapped her and forced her to tell them how to get into WICKED’s headquarters.

Brenda being alive was good. Brenda being alive meant that she made it out of WICKED headquarters, which meant at least a few others had to have. A wave of grief suddenly hit Teresa, not for Brenda but for Newt. Thomas never came before the building came down on her. Maybe they could have made another cure for their friend once they got out of the city and to wherever they were now, but Teresa remembers how Newt was the last time she saw him. He had an hour left in him, that’s if they were lucky. There’s no way he could have made it wherever they were without cranking out, and Newt would have never allowed himself to get that far, to get that close to hurting his friends.

One way or another, Newt was dead. Another person’s blood on Teresa’s hands, someone Teresa long ago considered to be one of her best friends. And he died hating her, and she'd given him every right too. 

“Can you explain to me what happened?” Teresa asked once she could make herself speak again.

“You came over the speaker and gave a whole thousand word speech on how Thomas could save Newt. When we got to Newt with the serum Thomas had knocked him out to keep him alive. We gave him the serum and Thomas told us to go get you and the cure, so we did, but the building kind of fell apart. We got out just in time, we found you clutching the cure,” Brenda explained. Teresa exhaled, Newt made it. She didn’t have to add his name to the long list of those she killed. “I suggested we kill you, we got what we needed from you and someone else could recreate the cure. You can thank Thomas for being alive, he insisted we didn’t do anything to you. He was even hesitant about letting me take my shift watching over you, I guess he thought I’d strangle you in your sleep or something.”

“Where is he? Thomas?” Teresa asked.

“With Newt, we haven’t been able to peel him away from him since we got back.” Teresa couldn’t hide her grin, she always knew there was something going on between Newt and Thomas, even before the maze. She and Minho used to bet on them as children, betting their pudding cups on if they’d walk into a room holding hands or something like that. 

But thanks to her none of her friends remembered that.

“I’m sorry Brenda, I really am. I know you have no reason to believe me, but I’ll do anything to prove it. I hurt you all, and you should hate me for the rest of eternity, but I really wanted to be your friend at one point. I still do.” Brenda stood up.

“Save it for someone who cares Teresa, ‘cause I sure don’t. I never liked you.” Brenda began to walk about of the shack they were in. Teresa didn’t know why the words hurt so much, she’d never liked Brenda either. They did though. Brenda turned around in the doorway. “I’ll let the others know you’re awake though, they’ve been worried, even if they won’t admit it.”

Part Two: Thomas’s POV

Thomas was half asleep when he heard Newt mutter something. He sat right up in his chair next to Newt, waiting. It had been over two weeks since they’d gotten back from the last city, and both Newt and Teresa hadn’t woke up. 

“Tommy,” Newt mumbled.

“I’m right here Newt, it’s me,” Thomas said, leaning in closer. He felt guilty about it, but he hadn’t even gone to visit Teresa, wanting to be there when Newt woke up. 

After a minute Newt’s eyes opened, and they were clear. The black veins had faded from his body shortly after they injected the cure into Thomas, but he hadn’t opened his eyes since then so Thomas saw the insane look in them every time he closed his eyes.

“Oh my god Newt, you’re alive,” Thomas threw is arms around his friend, pulling him into a tight hug, afraid to let go. Newt laughed in Thomas’s embrace. 

“Still a bit confused on that part, care to explain how?” Newt said. A wave of relief hit Thomas again. He didn’t know what he would’ve done if Newt died, he couldn’t make it in a world without his best friend.

“Teresa,” Thomas said. “Teresa made a cure. It was my blood the whole time, she just figured it out first.” Thomas sighed. “I feel like an idiot Newt, I could have spared you all that pain the whole time.”

“Oh shut up you twat,” Newt said. “I would’ve died long before the flare without you. You save me every day just by being there. You-”

“Thomas!” Minho called, interrupting Newt’s statement which Thomas really wanted to hear the end of. “Teresa’s awake and looking for you.” Minho came into the tent.

“Good to see you too,” Newt said, rolling his eyes sarcastically and grinning fondly. Minho gasped and hugged Newt tightly. 

“I was so worried,’ Minho said. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again you ugly shank.”

“Can’t breathe,” Newt gasped. Minho let go of Newt and laughed.

“Hold on, Gally and Frypan are with Teresa, but there’s one other person who’s been waiting for you to wake up,” Minho said before dashing out the tent. He came back a few minutes later with a familiar blonde girl by his side.

Sonya had explained to them all that when WICKED took her and Aris they’d given their memories back, but she’d never been able to tell Newt she remembered they were siblings before he ran off to follow Thomas.

“Do you remember me?” Sonya asked timidly from the doorway. Newt didn’t respond for a minute, and Sonya’s face fell. “That's a stupid question. You’ve met me after the swipe, you remember me as Sonya, but why would I think you’d remember me as-”

“How could I ever forget you Lizzy?” Newt said, his voice cracking. Tears streamed down Sonya’s face as it lit up and she attacked her brother with a strong embrace. “The flare must have damaged the swipe. I don't remember everything, but I remember some. Enough.” Thomas suddenly became conscious to the fact he was holding Newt’s hand. 

“We’ll leave you two to catch up if you’d like,” Thomas offered. Newt squeezed his hand tightly.

“Please don’t go,” Newt said. “I want you to stay.” Thomas knew the words were directed at all of them, but it felt like they were meant just for him. His heart skipped a beat at the thought.

Part Three: Minho’s POV

Minho had always been a guy who was relatively fond of people around him falling in love, but he sure as hell wasn’t fond of people around him being completely oblivious to the fact that they’re in love. 

Minho usually had his routine “Newt and Thomas were fools before all this and Thomas is an even bigger fool now because he still hasn’t realized his feelings for Newt” rant with Brenda and/or Gally, but Gally had gone to take his shift accompanying Teresa, who said she still wasn’t ready to face Thomas and Newt, and Brenda had stalked off after telling them Teresa had woken up.

So when Sonya plopped down next to Minho on the log he sat on in front of the bonfire and said, “Can Newt and Thomas just kiss already?” Minho figured she’d have to do.

Minho quickly stole a glance over to where the pair sat laughing on a log with Jorge and Vince. Thomas had his arm around Newt and Newt had his head rested on “Tommy’s” shoulder. When Minho made a comment on it they said “it’s just a bro thing”. Over the past few weeks Minho had sat like that with Gally multiple times, and it was most certainly not a bro thing. 

“It’s so annoying isn’t it?” Minho said. “I was trapped in a maze and the scorch with them, I’ve been dealing with it a lot longer than you have.” It would cause Minho to rip out his hair, but his hair was so beautiful he couldn’t bring himself to do it. 

“Even Aris caught onto it, and it took him to see Harriet and I kiss in front of him five times before he realized we were together back in the maze,” Sonya rolled her eyes. 

A brilliant idea came to Minho. Of course, all of his ideas were brilliant, but this one was even more brilliant than the others.

“How about we put an end to this pining?” Minho asked Sonya, grinning wickedly.

“Got anything in mind?” She asked him. Sweet Sonya, sweet innocent Sonya. if only she knew he had not one thing in mind, but multiple things in mind that were all incredibly risky and might cause Vince to banish them all, but they all had the same result: Newt and Thomas getting together.

“I do, but we can’t do it alone. Get Harriet and Aris and I’ll get Gally, Frypan, Teresa, and Brenda and we can all meet at the beach tomorrow after curfew.” 

“Should I be scared?”

“Probably, but not that much. I’ve done crazier things, and look at me, I’m still here.”

“Okay then.” Sonya was also grinning like crazy, and Minho knew this was the birth of a beautiful friendship, one built on interfering in other people’s for the better.

[ectoplasm-james]

@yolopatriarch gave me xue yang but my ask box is out of commission so we’re doing it like this lmaoooooo

send me a character and i’ll give you my feelings on them, the people i ship with them, my brotps, my unpopular opinions, etc. 

how i feel about this character

every day i think about when wang haoxuan said that xue yang just wants to feel safe bc 1) it broke my heart and 2) i think it brilliantly puts his whole character into perspective. literally everything about him--the murder, the constant smile, the constant laughter--all makes so much sense if you approach it from the view that xue yang feels constantly lowkey terrified and out of control and is trying to compensate for it. the kid murders an entire clan because of one busted finger and i think his motivation is equal parts a desire for revenge and a need to control the source of his trauma. 

i always write him with the understanding that, psychologically, he hasn’t really progressed past the moment he got run over. when you grow up poor and homeless, nobody really considers you human, and when you kill a bunch of people, nobody really considers you human. so no one is going to talk to you, no one will touch you, and certainly no one is going to care for you. so of course he keeps on killing people and goes absolutely out of control because 1) he can’t afford to let all of that bother him and 2) if he stays violent and unapproachable, he can’t be taken advantage of, and he can’t be hurt / made to feel inferior / weak / etc. it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

this is also why i have a lot of feelings about submissive masochist xue yang and pain in controlled environments and sex as self-harm but that’s a fic for another day lmao

your honor, i love him

all the people i ship romantically with this character

it’s like this: jiang cheng might be the fandom bicycle (which is funny for several reasons) but xue yang is MY fandom bicycle. i am prepared to read this disaster with more or less anyone. i think every character in the untamed deserves some unethical non-free range dick (especially the women. let the women of the untamed get some zest in their sex lives. on god.)

that being said, xiao xingchen of fucking course. every day i think about xue yang deciding to get revenge and then just fucking. living with him for three years bc he’s nice to him and laughs at his jokes and gives him candy ive said this before but the soft dom energy of leaving candy on your man’s pillow every morning makes me go apeshit every time i think about it holy fucking shit xxc your mind

I’m actually not as interested in songxuexiao tbh (although it does comprise a great deal of what i read mostly bc fics in that tag have a reading of his relationship with xxc that runs closer to my own, and there is some absolutely brilliant stuff out there).  i think my personal lack of interest is mostly because I just can’t quite get a hook on song lan’s character

i’m also very partial to him and jin guangyao together as like an evil fuckbuddy situation (altho i have seen at least one fic where they knew each other as kids that hurt way more than i expected it to). be gay do crime. on a similar note i think xue yang deserves yiling laozu hatesex

my non romantic otp with this character

he and a-qing are basically tom and jerry in yi city and it’s the funniest thing in the world.

i also really enjoy the concept of xue yang and qin su vibing together at jinlintai a) because again it’s really funny and b) jiggy would have an aneurysm about it

qin su: oh darling that nice young man stopped by for tea again today!

jiggy:

if they’re both banging him so much the better

my unpopular opinion about this character

characters like xue yang inevitably invite rancid takes which is why i’m proud to say i don’t really know what the popular takes about him are. as long as we’re talking tho, i don’t think xue yang is a monster but also i’m not sure that he would be capable of changing completely even if he’d spent the rest of his life with xxc, bUT i’m not really pressed about it, you know? he is what he is, and he is very gorgeous to me

one thing i wish would happen / had happened with this character

i really would have liked to have seen more of the yi city stuff since i’m pretty sure you get more from a-qing in the novel. understandable why it was pared down but also! i deserve domestic goddess!xue yang

[qqueenofhades]

im crying reading your ask replies tonight because Ivan really went into the Second Army with the mindset to not ever allow himself another weakness because he’s already lost too many people he cared about to the war and then somehow, even though Ivan held him at a distance and probably pushed him away at first, Fedyor wheezled his way into Ivan’s heart. And Ivan has literally had to read the “On behalf of King Pyotr, our deepest condolences…” for literally every single person he’s cared about and he cannot, absolutely cannot have Fedyor share a similar fate. Fedyor is this one weakness, this one good thing, he’s selfishly allowed himself and he’s absolutely terrified that he’ll lose Fedyor too. ivan is fragile™️

im fine. everything is fine. i am not in a glass case of emotion over two background characters with 6 mins of screentime. Your ask responses caused these feels 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Me? Have approximately 500 feelings over the fact that Ivan, the boy who had lost or was in the process of losing all of his male family members to the war by the time he became a fully fledged Grisha, then started being drawn to/falling in love with Fedyor and it definitely scared the shit out of him? Maybe. Because it would be one thing if Fedyor was safely back in the Little Palace and away from the front lines, but nope, he is doing the exact same hard and dirty job as Ivan, there is no safety for him, he is exposed to the exact same risks, and Ivan has already seen his father/uncle/brothers die like flies? WELP. Sure, Fedyor is Grisha and they were otkazat'sya, but does that really make him any safer?

So yes. I have written about it in headcanons and fic prompts and ask responses, but it makes SO much sense that Ivan would be incredibly loyal to the Darkling, as long as he was promising to keep Fedyor safe. (I am weak for this theme in my OTPs as a rule, but yes.) Loving Fedyor is the single good thing that Ivan has allowed himself, which makes Simon Sears' comment about Fedyor being his soft spot hurt even more. Because Ivan's worst fear at this point is definitely that he is just on borrowed time with Fedyor, because he has been with everyone else. Another reason why the writers will receive personally delivered flaming bags of crap on their lawns if they kill them or break them up, IVAN ALREADY LOST EVERYONE ELSE OKAY, YOU DO NOT NEED TO MAKE IT MORE TRAGIC FOR OUR GRUMPY GARBAGE BOY. And it explains why he would be fine with pretty much whatever the Darkling does, if only he doesn't have to give Fedyor up too. He knows that he is literally setting himself up for this exact thing, but he just can't help it.

So yes. Fedyor is this ray of sunshine in Ivan's life and literally the only thing/person he has allowed himself to love despite losing literally everyone else (/hums "if there's a reason I survived when everyone who loved me has died, I'm willing to wait for it") and I truly don't know how we are all suffering this much over said background six-minutes-of-screentime-as-a-couple characters, but HERE WE FUCKING ARE. God dammit.

[gumidols]

I have finally managed to find an otp prompt list I actually like, so I’ll be trying to write for its prompts everyday in an attempt to amp up my writing skills!

Did I mentions it’s all Kamu/Hinaegi yeah that’s all it is-

Here’s the link to the prompt list!

I’m also writing this on AO3, so if you don’t like tumblr fics you can read it there!

To the 6 of you who shall appreciate this, enjoy!

“You said that I’d get to have you all weekend. Why can’t you just tell them you can’t go?” - “Because it’s my job, and it’s important.” - “And I’m not?”

“You said that I’d get to have you all weekend. Why can’t you just tell them you can’t go?” Hajime demanded, crossing his arms, before uncrossing them and running a hand through his hair.

It was a nervous habit that he had never truly broken. The words Makoto had said just a few moments ago rotting inside his brain. He still hadn’t made sense of any of it, couldn’t force his mind to properly digest the words, and when he didn’t understand something, he went into his default mode, defensive.

Makoto must have felt his anger and frustration, because he walked over to him and pushed his head into the crack between Hajime’s shoulder and neck, wrapping his arms around him in an attempt at comfort.

“Because it’s my job,” Makoto breathed out, eyes creasing in a lack of mirth and curving in a bittersweet kind of amusement. “And it’s important.”

They don’t trust me anymore. They want to keep their eyes on me. I’m in trouble because of you

“And I’m not?” Hajime whispered, and he knows he’s being cruel for no reason, knows he’s hurting Makoto over something that he can’t control, but he’s scared, and when he gets scared he points fingers at whoever he can, just to feel better about himself.

Makoto says nothing, simply clenching his arms around him tighter. Hajime brought his arms up to clench him back, nuzzling his face into Makoto’s nape.

Hajime felt Makoto smile against his shoulder. “It’ll be fine. Me, Kyoko, and Byakuya are just going to go to the Future Foundation for a little while, and then we’ll come back. No big deal”

But it was a big deal. It was a huge deal because Makoto had been summoned on account of his treason. He had been summoned for his execution.

Execution. God how he hated that word.

Makoto hated it too. Makoto wanted to throw up when he saw the email, demanding his return. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream, but Makoto was far stronger than Hajime. He held himself together, even when his light was beginning to flicker.

Hajime wouldn’t, couldn't let his light die. He didn’t know if he would be able to handle that again.

Hajime felt nauseous, his friends, Nagito’s, Chiaki’s executions flashing through his mind.

His mind slowly worked around the bloody scenes, placing Makoto into every one of them, until Hajime felt like he would collapse from how utterly scared he was.

No. He would do whatever it took to protect him. Whatever it took.

“You, you don’t have to,” Hajime swallowed around the huge boulder in his throat. “You can stay” stay here. With me. Please.

Makoto laughed, pulling himself out of Hajime’s tight grip and gracing his boyfriend with a smile. “Hajime, you know I can’t do that” he whispers, as though if he says it quietly enough it will soften the impact of the painfully truthful words.

“I’ll come back” Makoto whispers, tracing his fingers over Hajime’s chest. “I promise”

Right. Hajime just has to hope. He has to hope for everything to be alright. He has to hope that Makoto will come home safe. Because he has to, he just has to. There’s nothing else he can do.

If you were still Kamukura you wouldn’t have even hesitated to keep him safe. Kamukura would’ve killed thousands of Future Foundation employees to keep him safe, but what can you do? You’re just useless unreliable Hajime, and he’s going to die. You’re going to have to watch him die just like Chiaki-

Hajime looked at his hands, and for a moment, just a moment, he imagined they had harsh long black fingernails, imagined he had a face full of makeup and lips smeared with lipstick. He imagined he was wearing a tight black and white suit, and for a moment, he could see black tendrils of hair fall into his vision.

He turned to look in the mirror, and it was Kamukura who stared back.

For a moment, just a moment, Hajime entertained the idea of doing something terrible.

But only for a moment, before he took a deep breath, and pushed that part of him down into depths where it couldn’t hurt anyone.

Makoto was still staring at him, concern lining his features as Hajime took his hand into his and intertwined them, leaning down to bring their foreheads together.

As he led the younger towards the boat that may or may not be taking him to his death, when all he wanted to do was lay in their bed and drown in each other, Hajime thought.

‘I have to hope that Makoto will be okay. He will be okay.

But just in case...if he, dies

Just for a moment, I’ll indulge.’

Because if he couldn’t have what he wanted, the future he felt he deserved, then why should anybody else?

[eclpsedsun]

rules : tag at least 5 people to learn more about

tagged by : @caribaheine thanks sm bea! ♡♡♡

tagging : @resetme @burnhamandtilly @jynesro @fahey @marksfarrows @keepyourlife (of course feel free to ignore!) ♡

music

♡ fave genres : alternative, indie, rock, pop punk

♡ fave artists : halsey, måneskin, the unlikely candidates, the struts, barns courtney, bishop briggs, queen, arctic monkeys, lana del rey and many more

♡ fave songs : don't have one, but my fave albums are smoke + mirrors by imagine dragons, il ballo della vita by måneskin, pure heroine by lorde, i love you by the neighbourhood

♡ songs most listened to recently : i am not a woman, i'm a god by halsey

♡ song currently stuck in your head : dis-moi by bb brunes

♡ 5 fave lyrics :

"your heart was glass, i dropped it" - champagne problems, taylor swift

"when the stars look down on me, what do they see?" - thief, imagine dragons

"you steal the air out of my lungs" - don't take the money, bleachers

"in my head, i do everything right" - supercut, lorde

"heaven is a place on earth with you" - video games, lana del rey

♡ radio or your own playlist | solo artists or and bands | pop or indie | loud or quiet volume | slow or and fast songs | music video or lyrics video | speakers or headset | riding a bus in silence or while listening to music | driving in silence or with radio music on

books

♡ fave genres : young adult, contemporary, low fantasy, murder mysteries/thrillers

♡ fave writers : marie lu is probably the only author I keep up with

♡ fave book series : still searching for it

♡ comfort book : i'll give you the sun, aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe

♡ perfect books to read on a rainy day : any classic really

♡ 5 fave characters : kestrel trajan (the winner's curse), jude duarte (the folk of the air), adelina amouteru (the young elites), fang runin (the poppy war)

♡ 5 literary quotes that you know by heart :

"You could jump so much higher when you had somewhere safe to fall." - Truly Madly Guilty, Liane Moriarty

"The only way the universe will remember you is if you do something worthy of remembrance." - Illuminae, Amie Kaufman

"My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me." - Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen

"You can't get away from yourself by moving from one place to another." - The Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway

"The stars incline us, they do not bind us." - These Violent Delights, Chloe Gong

♡ hardcover or paperback | buy or rent | book series or standalone novels | ebook or physical copy | reading at night or during the day | reading at home or in nature | music while reading or reading in silence | realism or fantasy | one or multiple POVS | judging by the covers or the summary | rereading or just once

tv + movies

♡ fave tv / movie genres : fantasy, sci-fi, comedy, superhero

♡ fave movies : tenet, inception

♡ comfort movies : all of the early barbie movies + studio ghibli

♡ movies you watch every year : different versions of A Christmas Carol

♡ fave tv shows : 3%, sense8, orphan black, what we do in the shadows, the umbrella academy

♡ most rewatched tv show : avatar the last airbender

♡ ultimate otp : i don't really care that much tbh

♡ 5 fave characters : melanie cavill (snowpiercer), michael burnham (star trek discovery), yennefer (the witcher), daenerys targaryen (game of thrones), villanelle (killing eve)

♡ tv shows or movies | short seasons (8-13 episodes) or full seasons (22 episodes or more) | one episode a week or binging | one season or multiple seasons | one part or saga | half hour or one hour long episodes | subtitles on or off | rewatching or watching just once | downloads or watching online

[emerald-amidst-gold]

17, 21, and 24 for the OTP ask? 😁

Well, hello, friend! I shall answer for that is DUTY! >:D

17. What senses (sights, smells, feelings, etc). remind them of each other?

I did answer this one in another ask, but I can think of a few more to share! (I got so much for these two, don't worry~)

So, another thing that reminds Fane of Solas is any kind of painting, namely frescos. Surprise, surprise! But the reasoning is mainly because Fane used to dream of frescos painted in a temple, one he always finds himself traversing in his dreams in the earlier years of his life. The style was nostalgic, impeccable, as if the hand that had held the brush was fixated on getting every line, every detail, every color, and every proportion just right. The paintings were like little anecdotes, way points trying to guide him in a direction with paint and plaster, but the story was always left unfinished, and it isn't until all the memories flood back that Fane realizes who was the artist of his dreams. *winks*

Now, I'm not usually one for 'smell' references, but oddly enough, Solas is reminded of Fane through one. Namely, chamomile. This was something I thought of one day when I was fighting with a headache and I was just watching a Twitch stream, and I was like, "Chamomile is a natural stress reliever. Fane doesn't like tea, but there are bath oils and incenses infused with chamomile, right? He would definitely be given that by someone or maybe even takes initiative to get it himself." Thus, the headcanon was established! Fane smells like chamomile, and Solas can't help but smile when he smells it from another source, knowing that his dragon is trying to help himself in some way.

21. How have they changed each other for the better/for the worse?

So, there's a little bit of A and little bit of B for this question. There has indelibly been a positive influence on both Fane and Solas due to each other. Basically, it all stems from pre-Inquisition, aka Elvhenan/Arlathan.

Fane, as a dragon, was inherently tasked with observing elvenkind, watching the flow of which they progressed and if their machinations benefited the world in which they lived. Each dragon had this inherent task, albeit in different ways. Dragons that lived in arid regions were tasked with controlling the sandscape, preserving the ancient temples by covering them with said sand, making inaccessible areas accessible for wildlife, so on, so forth.

Fane, and the others of his specific kin, not only watched the Elvhen, they guided them, but only if it was deemed necessary. White dragons could not want for anything beyond what the world needed, and their powers of absorbing, reflecting, and understanding emotions was what made them highly sought after by the Evanuris. When the Evanuris began enslaving elves, they began enslaving dragons, too. And this is around the time Solas and Fane met; when Fane was the last of his white kin. Fane had gone into recluse, hiding; he turned his back on those who were suffering because he couldn't bear to see them be subjected to magic bending and breaking their minds, turning their eyes grey where they were otherwise a multitude of colors. Solas found him through a curious venture as we all know the dear wolf is prone to curiosity.

Their beginnings were rough. Fane tried multiple, multiple times to kill Solas. He saw him as no different than those who had thus far enslaved his kin. He held anger, rage, resentment, and pride, which warped his nature of calm observation and cool acceptance to preemptive prejudice and scornful indifference. Fane stopped caring; about everything. Solas reached out to him, wanted to help him, and for the sake of keeping things somewhat short, they grew close after constant revisits and...silence. Solas allowed Fane to watch him, learn about him, read his eyes, and in turn, Fane began to open up, rediscover his original nature, and learn about another side from a more personal view. Solas taught Fane that nothing can change or return to what they had been unless he tried, and he did, even though it ended poorly. And even though it takes him twenty-four years and a lot of hardship, Fane finally remembers that important lesson and he's forever grateful, even as they walk onto the same stage that burned before.

Now, Fane has helped Solas do something we all know the dear wolf is a bit hesitant to do, and that's show his emotions. I stated once upon a time that my interpretation of Solas a little more...personal. Basically, I'm exploring a side of Solas that we don't really get to see, and that's an emotional one. My stories encompass a lot of emotion, a lot of grey morality, so I try to do that while keeping Solas in character with how we know him. However, with this AU of mine, Solas is more in touch with his emotions when with Fane. Why? Because Fane did what he was tasked with from birth; he guided. Through silent looks and seemingly disgruntled huffs, Fane allowed Solas to open up, to feel safe when every corner held a knife.

He let him be him. Not the Dread Wolf. Not the Rebel God. Not anything more than what he was naturally, and that was a being who needed to let their emotions go as freely as the magic so intertwined with their nature. They were friends, companions, even though they were two completely different species, and for all intents and purposes, enemies. They loved each other, but couldn't say it. After Fane died, Solas locked up again, kept his emotions sealed away, but when Fane reappeared in his life, both unknowing of who the other was, it all came back so easily, so fluidly. And what you'll see in a lot of my stories of Solas and Fane's early acquaintanceship in Inquisition is that they flow, they let the other be weak even though they don't want to be weak.

As for how they change each other for the worse...well, that ties into a lot of what I have planned during Post-Trespasser arcs. My stories are 'fix-its', but again, grey morality. There's a happy ending, but not without opposition first and a lot of hard lessons. Solas and Fane will do shit that makes people go, "Why?!", but aren't we already saying that with what Solas canon-wise is doing? Why not add an Inquisitor into the mix and live the fantasy we weren't allowed to choose?

24. What is something they have each had to forgive the other for?

Okay, so Fane's isn't what you'd think it is. You all know me, I like to go, 'You thought not! AHA! >:D'. Most people who've read my stories might think, "Oh, Fane has to forgive Solas for erecting the Veil because it's driving his kin insane." That makes sense, but it's not what Fane has had to forgive Solas for. Fane has had to forgive Solas for doubting him.

What I mean by this is that Solas tries to steer Fane away from helping him (Look! It's canon after all! XD). And mainly it's because Solas sees Fane thriving in this new life, connecting with people, seeing the world from a different perspective, and so he starts to think that Fane wouldn't want to help him. Which is complete bullshit because Fane, even when Solas tries to gently steer him away, is like, "I'm here. I'm not going to abandon you again." But typical Solas is typical Solas and is weighed down with grief and his doubts, but eventually he relents after a dragon fight. I won't say when this will occur, but...yeah. It's a bad time, and it shows Solas that Fane wasn't thriving as well as he'd thought. It takes a bit, but Fane comes to understand why Solas was trying to guide him away, and it helps when you're a stubborn dragon in love with a stubborn wolf! :D

Now for Solas, I have a little excerpt from a short story (the one I've been sharing a lot in tag games!). It kind of gives a basis of what Fane can sometimes do when he's not thinking or if he doesn't talk to Solas.

***

“F..Fane..!”, Solas growled out, a surge of heat invading his head as he felt his dragon’s dormant fury within his soul. It was thrashing, knocking, pounding against the confines of their link, wishing to be set free through him and his actions.

“This is..ugh..important, dammit!”, Fane grunted out as Solas was finally starting to push back, as well as his own minor discomfort with the magic that was slowly building around them.

“Then..ngh..speak of it!”, Solas snapped, feeling something like a pinch against his mind before that sensation ricoheted outwards, a lesser burst of magic managing to separate their bodies, but not their tethered souls. “Hiding in your mind only inflicts more harm!”, he almost yelled, his mind clouding with unusual rage. He was never ruffled this easily, but this wasn’t him, was it?

No, this was Fane, or more accurately, Fane’s mind. And it was red hot with fury.

He watched with slightly haggard breathing as Fane slid back a few feet, a grimace on his face from the smell of ozone, but shook it off easily. Now fully golden eyes glared with steamy ferocity upon him, a broad chest heaving with Veil born ire and excitement at finally having a challenge. Solas straightened himself a bit, clearing his throat as the distance between their bodies allowed him to think a bit more clearly, but he could still feel the thread that connected them intensely.

“Ma’isenatha, please--”, Solas attempted to reach the unhinged being before him, even as he could feel his own mind beginning to cloud again as Fane stalked towards him. They needed to cease this dance before one of them got hurt or insanely ill!

“Quit…”, the fuming dragon began before whipping the staff in his hand around in a near perfect arc towards him. “..talking!”, he snarled furiously, deftly hitting the other end of the staff with his wrist to cut off its intended path for a shorter route.

Solas was a bit curious by the adept usage, but shuffled that thought away quickly to block the blow that was inevitably aimed for his jaw. Now wasn’t the time to ruminate! As much as he loathed to admit it, and encourage it, there was only one way out of this foolish scenario!

“Enough!”, a cry harboring necessary command releasing from his lips, making the link between them snap like a bowstring. “Ngh..!” The heady, harsh sensation had the air leaving his lungs before he swept one end of his staff upwards without volition, missing his mark by a hair. He blinked when the sensation eased off, grimacing as he stared at the staff poised just next to Fane’s face, precisely at the point where his scar was. How ironic, but he knew what was happening now with that.

The involuntary reaction had been too planned, too memory bound. It was like when they had viciously fought as Haven burned with fire and corruption, and he had had no choice but to wound the otherwise perfect face before him - a deep scar left on his left cheek from his staff blade. His arms had been wrapped, then strung up in invisible bonds that radiated desperate heat and furious rage, guiding them to repeat the action due to a desire for something unsaid.

In simple terms, he was being controlled by emotions alone - emotions that were not his own.

“Interesting.”, Solas said, but narrowed his eyes upon the fierce man. “Emotions are your strings.”, he pointed out, more realization dawning on him as to where all these minor outbursts, sudden movements, and disorienting sensations were coming from. Fane..

...was manipulating emotions, guiding them to the destination he desired.

Fane’s eyes narrowed, emerald reappearing to deepen with rage as tufts of his hair fluttered from the air behind his swipe. “I’m intervening.”, the draconic side of his love coming out in full bloom now.

“Why?” He issued it as more a command than a true question. He was mildly miffed by this usage of abilities, but he needed context to decipher why Fane had thought this was necessary. It was unusual and worrying for him to use them like this.

“It’s necessary.”, Fane said with a flat tone, but there was fire crackling beneath its supposed embers, as well as the deep emerald gaze bearing down upon him before he twisted his staff upwards to once again aim under his chin. Solas dodged the movement by an inch, feeling the amount of force behind it with air alone.

His dragon was steadily losing his control, and it wouldn’t be long until he was truly unhinged.

“Fane!”, Solas met the glare with one that felt just as furious as he called out, but finally began to retaliate, no longer wishing to play on the defensive and draw this out longer. “Very well..”, he said lowly, gripping the staff tightly as he pressed in harder, matching Fane’s footwork step for step as their blows connected with near splintering cracks. “...if you are so..”, a harsh crack of their staves reverberating through the air. “...intent on not speaking of what troubles you, then I will make it so you have no choice but to!”

A long, muscled leg nearly knocked into one of his knees as it swept under him, its pace incredibly fast for something intended to withstand punishment. It was like a dragon’s tail as it swept aside massive boulders, and uprooted century old trees.

Fane let out a gasping laugh. “You’re still..ngh..t..talking?!”, he roared, snowy brows furrowed in growing pain as sweat began to form along a lightly flushed temple, hand trembling where it nearly snapped his staff in half.

“I am doing what you refuse to do!” A jab with his staff nearly connected with a muscled arm, but it went through the gap between itself and the toned body it was attached to. “Gh..!”, he winced as he felt a sharp yank on his mind, as well as the staff in his hands as Fane grabbed a hold of it to pull him forward harshly.

The world halted suddenly, its furious, heated pace slightly cooled as their gazes connected, all sound flushing out to where the only sound was their combined, harsh breathing. Emerald and gold swam, ebbed around each other like a phylactery did with its magical blood as the face that bore them was lax in stunned silence, sweat trickling down flush cheeks before it would disappear along a strong neck. Solas felt his face was no better, feeling how droplets of sweat rolled down the sides of his face and how his mouth was slightly agape as he fought for a shred of breath.

What was...going on? This feeling, like their desires were coalescing, taking shape before them like spirits shaped the Fade around them...it was intoxicating, comforting, and serene amid the furious battle they had been engaged in moments before. Their link was still there, but it was soft, velvet against his mind as the gentle essence wrapped around it in an embrace.

It was no longer painted...red.

“Hnn..”, Solas let out a quiet sigh, breath hitching after as the blanket around him became warmer, silken. When had it shifted? He hadn’t been aware because of rage painting the world before him in crimson..

“Too...much..”, he heard Fane whisper out between pants, but it was more to himself than to Solas. “...You shouldn’t feel that like I do.. Shit..”

Solas blinked a bit to reorient himself, the softness of his mind making it hard to think before he saw Fane’s face near inches from his, the hand that had grabbed his staff now making itself known upon the back of his neck, steadying him. When had that gotten there?

“What..”, Solas started, closing his eyes for a moment as the world spun for a second before reopening to try again. “What..was that?”

“My mind.”, Fane muttered, eyes flitting across his face worriedly. “I didn’t think..”, he trailed off with a light growl as brilliant eyes turned downcast. “I fucked up… I’m sorry...”

***

So, yeah. It doesn't take Solas long to forgive Fane, but when he first demonstrates just how dangerous his abilities can be and actively uses them to manipulate our wolf gets a little miffed. Solas wants Fane to use his voice more, and these are moments in which Fane doesn't and taps into that warped perception of himself; the one that got him killed.