#people forgot how massive Canada is

[thedeviousdevilxx]

If GnR was going to Calgary or Edmonton, I would so go in a heartbeat, but alas they’re only going places that are to far and expensive lol fuck.

[originallandlockedmariner]

2023

Pickleball. Generative AI. Lula takes office in Brazil, Amazon Rainforest throws a party. Prince Harry refusing to stop talking about his frozen penis no matter how many times society begged him to stop. UFOs are real. Viral cat dubbed ‘largest cat anyone has ever seen’ gets adopted. Pee-Wee’s big adventure ends. Musk & X. Turkey-Syria earthquake kills thousands. India surpasses China as ‘country squeezing in the most peeps’. Tucker Carlson ousted. Miss USA and her 30 lbs moon costume. Wildfires in Kelowna and Hawaii. Macron tinkers with retirement age of the French. Paltrow can’t ski. Big Red Boots. Bob Barker leaves us. Alabama mom delivers 2 babies from her 2 uteruses in 2 days. Charles III. Ukrainian counteroffensive against Russian forces as the war drags on. Taylor Swift is Time’s Person of the Year. African ‘coup belt’. Flo-Jo dies in her sleep. Chinese spy balloon shot down. Hollywood writers strike. Human ‘nice mugshot’ Shitstain and his 91 indictments. Highest interest rates in 2 decades. The Bear’s Christmas episode. War in Gaza. Shinzo Abe is assassinated. Alex Murdaugh. Ocean Cleanup removes 25 000 lbs of trash from the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. Vase purchased for $3.99 sells for $100 000 at auction. Barbenheimer. A third of Pakistan is flooded. Lionel Messi is the GOAT. Travis Kelce. The Sphere opens in Las Vegas. Regulators seized Silicon Valley Bank and Signature Bank, resulting in two of the three largest bank failures in U.S. history. “The Woman In Me”. WHO declares COVID ain’t a thing no more. Titan sub sinks, rich people die. Matthew Perry drowns. Dumbledore Dies (again). Massive sales of ‘Fuck Trudeau’ flags for jacked-up micro-dick trucks. Everything Everywhere All At Once. June-August was the hottest three-month period in recorded history across the Earth. Tina Turner dies. And the Beatles release a new song?! Wow… You got big shoes to fill 2024.

Archives for context:

2020

Kobe. Pandemic. Lockdown. Koalas on fire. Harry and Meg retire. Toilet paper hoarding. Alcoholism. Impeach the f*cker. Parasite. Bonnie Henry. Tiger King. Working from home. Sourdough bread. Harvey Weinstein guilty. Zoom overdose. Dip your body in sanitizer. 6 feet. Quarantine. OK Boomer. Home schooling (everyone passes). Murder hornets. Dolly Parton. Don’t hug, kiss or see anybody, especially your family. Chris Evans’ junk. TikTok. Glory holes. Face masks. CERB. West Coast wildfires. Stay home. Small Businesses lose, big box stores win. F*ck Bozos. ‘Dreams’ and cranberry juice. Close yoga studios, but thumbs up to your local gym. Speak moistly to me. George Floyd. BLM. F*ck Trump. Phase 2, 3 and Summer. RBG. Baby Yoda. Biden wins. Bond and Black Panther die. No more lockdown. Back to school and work. Just kidding... giddy up round 2. Giuliani leaks shit from his head. Resurgence of chess. UFOs are real. Restrictions. Dave Grohl admits defeat. Monolith. “F*ck... forgot my mask in the car”. No Christmas shenanigans allowed. Bubbles. Alex Trebek. Use the term ‘dumpster fire’ one too many times. Jupiter and Saturn form 'Christmas Star'. Happy New Year Bitches!!!! 2021... you better not sh*t the bed!!

2021

“We love you, you’re very special”. Failed coup attempt at the Capital. Twitter, FB and IG ban Donny. Hammerin’ Hank goes to the Field of Dreams. Bozo no longer richest man but still a twat. Leachman, Tyson, and Holbrook pass. The economy is worse than expected. Kim and Kanye split. Brood X cicadas. Dre has an aneurysm and nearly has his home broken into. Bridgerton. MyPillow CEO is a douche. Covid restrictions extended indefinitely. Captain Von Trapp dies. Proud Boys officially a Terrorist Organization. Richard Ramirez. Cancer takes Screech. Travel bans. Impeachment trial (again?… oh and this was barely February? WTF??!!) Suez Canal blockage. Myanmar protest. Kong dukes it out with Godzilla, while Raya watches. Olympics. Friends compare elective surgeries. F9. Canada Women’s Soccer Gold. Free Britney. Multiverses. Residential Schools in Canada unearth children’s bodies. Kate is Mare of Easttown. Cuomo resigns. Disney and Dwayne cruise together. Wildfires. Delta variants. Musk passes Bezos. Candyman x 5. Capt. Kirk goes to space. F*ck Kyle Rittenhouse. Astros didn’t win. Squid Game. Goodbye Bond. Dune is redone. Angelina is Eternal. Astroworld deaths. Meta. Omicron. Three Spidermen. Tornados in December? World Juniors cancelled. Pills against Covid. School opening delayed. And Betty White dies. 2022… my expectations are ridiculously low…

2022

Wow… eight billion people. Queen Elizabeth II passes away after ruling the Commonwealth before dirt was invented. The monkeypox. Russia plays the role of global a**hole. Wordle. Mother Nature rocks Afghanistan. Hover bike. Styles spits on Pine. Olivia Newton John, Kristie Alley, and Coolio leave us. Pele was traded to team Heaven. FTX implodes. Madonna and the 3-D model of her vagina. Pig gives his heart to a human. Beijing can brag that it is the first city ever to host both the Summer Olympics and Winter Olympics. Uvalde. $3 trillion Apple. Keith Raniere gets 120 years. The Whisky War ends with Canada and Denmark going halfsies. Mar-a-Lago. Nick Cannon brood hits a dozen. Shinzo Abe is assassinated. Inflation goes through the roof (if you can actually afford to put a roof over your head). Volodymyr Zelensky. European heat wave. Bennifer. Salman Rushdie is stabbed on stage, Dave Chappelle tackled, and Chris Rock is only slapped. Thích Nhất Hạnh. Heidi Klum goes full slug. Cuba knocked out by Ian. Liz Truss and 4.1 Scaramuccis. Taylor Swift breaks Ticketmaster. Human shitstain Elon Musk ignores helping mankind and buys Twitter instead. Riri becomes a mommy. NASA launches Artemis 1. Trump still a whiny little b*tch. Music lost Loretta Lynn, Christine McVie, and Meat Loaf. Democracy died at least three times. Pete Davidson continues to date hottest women on the planet (no one understands how?!) Microplastics in our blood. Alex Jones is a c*nt. So is DeSantis. Argentina wins the World Cup. Meghan and Harry. Eddie Munson rips Metallica in the Upside Down. tWitch. Roe vs Wade is overturned by the micro dick energy of the Supreme Court. CODA. James Corden shows he is a "tiny Cretin of a man". Amber (and the sh*t on the bed) Heard (round the world). Sebastian Bear-McClard proves he’s one of the f*cking dumbest men alive. Latin America's ‘pink tide’. Anti-Semitic rants by Ye. Bob Saget. A verified blue checkmark. Godmother of punk Vivienne dies. And, Tom Cruise feels the need for speed yet again. 2023… whatcha got for us?!? Nothing shocks me anymore.

@daily-esprit-descalier

[hatsunevitu]

SO i’ve been thinking about this plot when cartman dies. or rather, particularly about kyle’s reaction to cartman’s death ‘cause yk. kyman is rotting my brain.

first of all i strongly believe that everyone who thinks kyle would be happy or indifferent about cartman’s death are mischaracterising him so badly. like. come on. you don’t have to ship kyman to understand this would be a major shock for him and he would possibly even blame himself. think whatever you want, but they’re still best friends no matter what.

then, um, i think that only three people would actually react to cartman’s death properly, and it’s stan, butters and kyle. but stan’s reaction would be something similar to s5e13 “kenny dies”, because he would freak out about one of his friends dying, not because it’s exactly cartman. then goes butters who doesn’t really understand the concept of dying but is still pretty confused and scared. they’re very close so it would hurt butters. kenny doesn’t show any strong emotions, but that is because he’s used to death and anyway he’ll definitely meet cartman in hell.

what about kyle, though, i’m pretty sure that he won’t believe this news for a single second for, like, several days. he would convince everyone it’s “One of these stupid pranks, come on, dude, don’t tell me he managed to fool you”. and although most of the people didn’t believe cartman’s death the first second, kyle would be stubborn enough to deny reality for almost a week. he would look at cartman’s dead body and be like “Wow, that’s almost convincing, you really outdid yourself, Fatass. This fake corpse must’ve really cost you a fortune” and everyone else around him has no idea how to tell him it’s true.

he would stand at cartman’s funeral with the most bored and irritated face saying loudly: “Okay, Fatass, we get it, you tricked us all, bravo, now cut this shit off already, it’s not even funny anymore”, making liane cry even more desperately.

but then there went five days, then a week, and kyle finally started to realise the truth because cartman is too hyperactive to do this kind of prank for so long, he would definitely get bored and show up after, like, two days of disappearance.

and kyle really understood that while everyone else was mourning he was being a dick not even letting himself think for a single minute that this all might be real. like. he couldn’t even imagine a thought of the world without cartman, it just seemed so wrong so he really preferred acting like it’s all fake. and it made him feel so, so guilty. i’m pretty sure at that moment he almost forgot every horrible thing cartman had done to kyle, he just kept thinking about positive moments and he started missing cartman so badly. he wouldn’t admit it to anyone, even to himself, probably, but his life without cartman was somehow incomplete.

and then the rage came. we know how kyle tends to overreact and do something massive when he feels negative emotions, right? like, he tried to burn down the school because of the girls’ list, he freaking nuked canada after seeing cartman and heidi dating and being left behind, and i’m pretty sure there are plenty of examples.

so no matter how cartman died he would try to compensate it somehow. he didn’t know how to deal with this grief and shock so he tried to fight with the reason. did cartman die ‘cause of doctors incompetence? then kyle will sue the goddamn hospital cartman died at. car accident? he will organise a picket about drivers’ carelessness and send the person who hit cartman to jail. and so on, so on.

and everyone would be surprised and he would make excuses like “I’m not doing it because of Cartman, it’s just… it’s a big problem in our country, I want justice, that’s all”.

but he would blame himself. for his constant fights with cartman, for his disbelief the first days, for letting cartman die like this and not being around. and he started to think about their friendship when cartman was alive and–

kyle: It’s been two weeks, and I still can’t believe it, Stan. In my mind he’s still here and I expect to see him at the bus stop every morning. Is it normal?..

stan: I know how you feel. It’s hard for all of us, dude.

kyle: I mean, why did it take me so long to understand he wasn’t joking?

stan: Well, you guys were sort of archrivals, so I guess it’s not surprising...

kyle: Huh… we were, weren’t we?…

and it’s so heartbreaking.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Refugee Issues

So apparently they're going to be rounding up as many of the refugees in this country as they can find, in kind of blitz attacks, in preparation for sending them to Rwanda. Which ... I mean ... it feels like an exaggeration to say "this feels like some Nazi bullshit" in this day and age, but the scary thing is that it's not an exaggeration.

It's getting more complicated and worse, too, because of the whole thing with Ireland being in the EU and Northern Ireland ... not. Because some have taken the risk of trying to get around how shitty the UK is being about refugees in small boats by going a little further and going to Ireland. Ireland is now saying they're going to punt them over the border into Northern Ireland because "they're not our problem", and the UK is going, "Only on the understanding that they're getting sent right back to France; hey, why don't you send them right back to France, since you're both EU?" and ... it's all too fucking complicated but people are playing this massive game of NIMBY with people who just want to live somewhere that they speak the language and won't be persecuted.

Seeing the accommodations for refugees who are sent to Rwanda ... it worries me. On one hand, it sounds pretty sweet, but ... there are a couple of issues I'm having. One - where are they getting the money for this? From us, one would assume, given that it's the UK's stupid project, so why don't they build something similar here? So I don't entirely trust it. I also don't like what I see between the lines of "They can go wherever they like; we're not keeping them incarcerated or anything!" Yes, it sounsd good, but ... like ... I feel like given Rwanda's history? They seem to be setting the stage for refugees just ... disappearing and for them to be able to say, "Well, we haven't been keeping them prisoner or anything; we're not responsible!"

I think the worst part is that the whole set-up gives one of two options for how to proceed: "We will help you live in Rwanda, or we will help you go back to your home country". Neither of those options sounds very good. Rwanda is away from friends and family, and is a strange country where they're only welcome to a point because some other government gave that country money to be rid of them, might have to learn a new language (though English is one of the languages used in Rwanda, along with French, Swahili, and Kinyarwanda, so I guess it depends on how widely English is used). Alternatively ... why the fuck would they want to go back to their home country? They risked their lives to run from it because staying there was worse!

Meanwhile, more and more refugees are being created - Israel vs Pakistan, Iran vs Israel, gods know how many others (there's only so much news I can stomach, I admit) - and nobody seems to care beyond yelling "NOT IN MY BACK YARD!" every time these people who lost everything but their lives need a place to stay.

And this country? They're now talking about cutting down on the number of international students allowed to come here. They just ... really, really hate foreigners right now. And I know they probably don't mean me - not even so much because I'm white, because the Polish population of the UK got so much horrific shit thrown at them in the time around the Brexit referendum, but because I'm North American. People still ask "What part of the States are you from?" because I think they forgot Canada exists. Despite being part of their Commonwealth, which ... kind of grinds my gears, but anyway. Point is that none of that "They probably don't mean me" helps. First, I'm angry as hell that they mean anyone when they're talking about cruelty to people who were not born in this country. But also? When it's everyone who wasn't born here - the families of healthcare workers, university students, anyone who doesn't make enough money? It's hard to avoid the idea that they do mean me. Especially since I'm not cis, I'm not het, and I am not healthy and fully abled.

I try pretty hard to look on the bright side of things, or at least focus on the small joys of my life. The latter works better than the former. The "bright side of things" is getting smaller and smaller every day, and ... yeah.

[lokiina]

I went to my first pride Parade/event today and I'm

Can I just say, it was really really reassuring to see how massive of a turn out there was.

seeing how much hate and negativity there is online about LGBTQ+ stuff, and watching what's going on the USA (I'm in Canada and US politics often make waves up here) makes everything seem so much scarier, seeing literally THOUSANDS of people turn out for this today made me so dfkjghdkfjgh

It's gonna be okay guys. The love was definitely stronger than the hate.

My face is very sunburned rn, cuz I forgot sunscreen. RIP. But I had so much fun. My brother in law came with me for support cuz my friendo that would have otherwise was unavailable.

But also shout out to the 2 separate people who recognized my Electric Callboy shirt. No one else has ever pointed it out before. kjdfghdkfjg Me and the one guy were in agreement we needed someone to play Arrow of Love on their loud speakers. 😂

[rainchyna]

‎‎‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎♡ ❝RATED : SWEETHEARTS!❞ ♡

‎‎‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎EPIS♡DE : SIX (V)

warnings! [light angst, worried y/n, had to make them stop at a supermarket bc it’s a road trip, adam is a mess lord oh my god, cussing, y/n and christian talking shit abt people in high school, adam is a wee bit depressed, it’s long]

you wait for christian to load your bags in to the backseat. “you got everything?” you ask. “yeah” he reply’s getting in the front seat. “you do realize that the next show is in two days right?” he asks as you start up the car’s engine. “and that this trip will take eighteen hours back and forth?” he adds. “yep” you answer with tight lips. “but can we put on a show without the third idiot?” you ask looking at him. “right”.

the first three hours of the ride were silent, mostly because christian fell asleep and you didn’t have the heart to turn up the radio to the fill the slightly jarring silence since it might wake him up. all you could think about was how fucking stupid adam was for just getting up and leaving you just like that. he was never the one who runs away from his feelings, he was always upfront and honest with you, even in the smallest most minuscule of things. all you could think about was how he was. you needed to know if he was okay, both mentally and physically. is he sleeping well? has he been eating healthy? he better have remembered taking his vitamins today … or the last couple days.

“god fucking damn it adam”

4:44 pm, that same day…

you were knee deep in thought when christian began moving around. “i’m hungry” was the first thing he said. you had just passed a sign that said that nearest stop was 10 miles away. a thought crossed your mind as lightly gasped. “what’s wrong?” christian asked, confused. you mouth hung open for a second before saying, “adam’s birthday is tomorrow”. “oh shit. we forgot” christian sighed. “oh no, you forgot, i was just distracted by everything” you defended. christian just narrowed his eyes at you, before saying “we’ll get him a key chain or something…” he trailed. you look over at him with a ‘deadass?’ face. “what? it’s not like he’s been the greatest friend for the last couple days!” he said. “true that” you nodded.

slowly but surely, you pulled up on a 7/11. next to it was a subway and a tim horton’s. “can you grab us proper food while i just get junk from the 7/11?” you asking parking the car. “sure” christian said grabbing his jacket. a cold breeze hit your face as you entered the convenience store, these places were always so cold for no reason. you walked towards the fridges at the back, scanning the drinks available through the freezing glass. you grabbed at least eight juice boxes, two tubs of cookie dough ice cream, and on your way to the cashier you took some bags of crisps.

at the register was a younger man, nineteen, twenty at most. curly poofy hair and some pimples here and there. “how’s traffic out there?” he asked with a thick french accent. his name tag read ‘jean-pierre’, “barely any honestly” you replied. “do you happen to sell keychains by any chance?” you ask. without missing a beat, the guy pulled out this massive bowl that had wooden and metallic chains on it. you dug through it as he scanned your items. ‘i <3 canada!’, ‘toronto, canada’ and more canada related ones came up, until one caught your eyes. ‘happy birthday you sexy whore’, was it appropriate for you current situation? debatable. would adam like it? most definitely yes. was it a little too on the nose? absolutely. “i’ll take this one!” you smiled. the guy took it, eyeing the chain then you. “on me, cause you’re my favourite wrestler” he smiled. you eyes lit up, “i’m your favourite?” you ask, “of course! and my boyfriend loves edge and christian, edge is his favourite because he’s more unhinged, but we love you guys!” he said. “i also really like lita” he added

“oh my god i would actually die for her”

“girl, she’s so iconic”

“I KNOWWW”

“IT’S THE HAIR AND ATTITUDE”

“SHE’S LITERALLY THE COOLEST PERSON”

you both stood there for at least fifteen minutes talking about your favourite wrestlers, until you remembered that you’re out here for a reason. you quickly said goodbye and left. as you sat in your car seat you were met by a slightly grumpy christian. “you were gone for like half an hour bro” he complained. “my bad, the cashier guy was the best person ever”.

the ride was pretty decent, mostly you and christian eating and talking shit about people from high school. “remember that chick mikaela?” he asked, mouth full of fries. “oh my fucking god, i used to hate her” you said, christian was confused. “i thought you guys were friends..?” he muttered, “ no! bro, she was only friends with me because she liked adam” you said. “deadass?” he was more surprised than confused, “i swear, bro, there were so many girls that were friends with me because they wanted to get closer to adam. and to be fair though, i was a bit of a cockblock. i would always be like ‘oh he’s already seeing someone’ you know”. you admitted. “cockblock! cockblock! y/n, y/n, the cockblock!” he sang.

“c’mon man-“

“cockblock! cockblock! y/n, y/n, the cockblock!”

“i didn’t want anyone near him-“

“wait, you loved him since high school?!” christian asked. “i thought it was obvious”, christian was dumbfounded for a second. “obvious?? you literally friendzoned him so many times bro” he said. “i did?” you were both equally confused. “let me list some of the times you did, lita’s birthday last year, prom, my 17th birthday, during our first european tour, when we first debuted, do i go on?” he said, sarcasm dripping from his comment. “i thought he was being overtly nice”

“he’s literally in love with you”

adam was a mess. he showered once ever since he came back, his hair was tangled, his under-eyes looked like he rubbed his eye with eyeliner on. he was in his old room, the wall in front of him had crayon and marker scribbles detailing his, yours and christian’s heights over the years. there were stickers all over his cupboard and bed frame and his old gaming console sat frozen in time next to three, tiny joysticks. adam laid back on his bed facing the ceiling. the night before he laid on his side staring at his bedroom’s door, he cried and his knuckles got sore. he knew that nothing will happen if he continues ignoring your calls, if he continues pretending that he’s not hurt, pretending that he doesn’t care. it was eating him from the inside, but some how he just wants you more. he felt like a flower bud in concrete, he felt incomplete, he wondered if you’ll ever meet. hopefully you noticed that he was gone by now, hopefully matt wasn’t taking up all your time. i didn’t even matter to him who you were with at this point, he just wanted to see you. so when you decide, it’s your time to arrive, he’s loved you for all of his life.

there was knock at his door, “hey…”, it was his mom, “yeah?” he said voice deep from not speaking in hours, “are you sure you’re okay? ‘cause this is the weirdest break you’ve ever had, y’know? like .. where’s jay? where’s y/n? you three are like conjoined triplets” she said sitting next to him. he sighed deeply, “can i be honest with you?” he asked, “well of course, i am your mom after all” she smiled sweetly.

“i’m in love with y/n, she’s all i can think about. it’s literally consuming me at this point. and like an idiot i ran away from my feelings, instead of saying something and i haven’t heard from her and christian in a while” he breathed out.

“oh” she said, “i thought we’re gonna say something surprising”.

adam just looked at his mom confused, “i just said all of that and it’s not surprising enough to you??” he asked slightly irritated. “that’s not the case, you’re feelings are obviously valid and you’re my son and everything, whatever, but you being in love with y/n isn’t news to me. it isn’t news to anyone, funny enough actually me and y/mom’s/n have this bet that you’ll get married by the time you’re twenty five” she joked.

“you have a bet on us?” adam giggled, first time since he came home. “yeah” she laughed. “c’mon get up, we’re gonna make cookies together, your favourite” she said as she stood my door’s frame. “just like when you were little”.

10:48 pm, even later.

after a long day of baking and listening to music with his mom, adam was slightly at peace. she always knew how to cheer him up. he was sprawled out on the living rooms couch, a plate of cookies resting on his torso while a movie he was watching played in the background. his mom had went to sleep a while ago, leaving adam alone with his thoughts. he thought about it for a while, if having you as his girlfriend wasn’t an option, he didn’t mind remaining as friends. granted it would burn his literal soul, because you gave him butterflies. all you had to do was walk away and pass him by, don’t acknowledge his smile when he tried to say hello to you.

simple as that, yet just the thought of you ignoring him physically hurt him. his mind ram miles and miles away, he couldn’t stop thinking about all the ways he can continue being friends with you, without it interfering with you and matt relationship. he couldn’t help but get emotional, that was years of friendship going down the drain. but that was the point of unrequited love, wasn’t it?

4:15, early in the morning

christian had taken over, as you were now asleep on the passenger seat. you had finally entered your hometown. the area was a little dark, pretty quite. apart from a couple cars driving into the night, nothing else was causing any type of noise.

he drove past several houses, recognizing some of them. he pulled up on your homes’ block, and there he could see them. the three houses in which you’ve all spent your childhood in. the lights at his house were all out, at your house the front porch lights was the only one on. the lights of the living room in adam’s were on. christian glanced at the digital clock before him, 4:20. (adam’s) mom was about to go on her morning run anytime soon. “y/n, wake up we’re here” he said parking the car. “we are?” you said rubbing your eyes, disoriented. “oh my god, we are”.

you stretched for a bit before asking “what time is it?”

“4:21”

“mom’s gonna go on a run”

“yeah we should go inside before she goes out, at least she’ll open the door for us” he said. you both stepped out of the car. you grabbed a juice box before closing the door. “you sure you wanna do this?” christian asked as he turned to face you. “seriously?” he added, you looked like a child with your little box and little straw. “what?” you asked, “i’m thirsty! plus i need some sugar in my system before we do this, i hate confrontation” you added. you dug in your pocket and pulled out some gum strips, “here” you said handing christian a piece, “if we’re gonna confront someone, we should at least look cool” you said. he took it and began walking towards adam’s house.

this is it.

“ewwww, ugh! oh my god!”

“are you okay??”

“i was! until i decided to chew mint gum while drinking orange juice” you frown. christian smiled.

“never change, y/n”

——————————

adam was shuffling about in the kitchen, looking for a glass to get some water. the large amount of sugar he had consumed from the cookies had caught up to him and he was parched. “oh my god, you scared me! why are you still awake?” his mom’s voice startled him. “i scared you?!” he sighed. “jeez, go get some sleep adam” she lightly patted on his back. “morning run?” he asked, “yeah, you wanna join me?” she asked, “maybe tomorrow…” adam muttered. a knock on the door interrupted their small talk, “can you fill this up for me?” she asked handing him her water bottle. “sure”.

a surprised gasp get from hell lips as she opened the door. “jay? y/n! what are you kids doing here?!”

adam felt his heart drop to his stomach. you were both here.

why were you here?

[goiterinthegullet]

Blue Eye Samurai and my inability to comprehend not driving for 6 hours just to get out of Illinois

Was watching Blue Eye Samurai (it's amazing) and noticed that I kept thinking "oh, that's a little silly how do people keep running into each other while they're traveling? Lol, fictions gotta fiction I guess" and then I realized. I'm from the States. I am so used to countries being MASSIVE I kinda forgot that Japan is like 26 times smaller than my home country. Also it's the 16th century and people are either walking or riding horses so that limits the ability for people to spread apart and yeah.

Just, I always have to remind myself that unless I'm watching something set in China, Canada, Brazil, Australia, etc., it's a little bit easier to walk from one side of your country to the other lol.

[fleurcareil]

Second month recap: July

Driving away from Sleeping Giant on 1st August means I've already completed two full months in the road!! Wow!! 🤩 And most amazingly, I still feel fantastic and am not ready yet to start going home by a long shot... 😁 in fact, I'm starting to get a bit concerned about everything that I still want to do in the remaining time, but I'm sure I'll figure it out!

I forgot to check the odometer but it was probably at around 67500 so that means I drove another 6,000 kilometers in the second month and slightly under 13,000 km in total. I still stick mostly with camping two nights in a row in a park (where I drive the absolute minimum), followed by a series of motels/inns/hotels when I drive larger distances, typically 3-4 hours a day interspersed with several breaks at viewpoints, small hikes, towns etc to get a feel of the area. I generally aim to arrive at my sleeping place by 6-7pm latest so that I have enough time to settle in before it gets dark (long summer hours help!) but once in a while I get there earlier around 3-4pm to get a lazy afternoon. And sometimes I only start at 10-11am taking it easy in the morning, especially when it's crappy weather 😅. The joy of absolute freedom to choose how I spend my days!! 🥰❤

I can hardly believe where I was at the end of the first month as that feels such a long time ago... in Matane in the Gaspesie, Québec. So last month, I did the entire Labrador loop which included a large section of unpaved road and more boreal trees than I ever imagined 😝. Got delayed on the cargo boat back to Québec so that resulted in some last minute changes to hotels and tours, then the ever-impressive sea along the Cote Nord all the way west to Québec City, several pretty national parks in central Quebec that were unfortunately impacted by flooding, a stay-over in Montreal and then along the Ottawa Valley via North Bay - Sudbury - Sault Ste Marie to the spectacular scenery of Lake Superior! 🎉 The diversity in the natural environment from maritime to boreal, from sea cliffs to inland canyons & massive lakes is so incredibly huge, and I'm only half way, as the Prairies and the Rockies are still ahead of me! 😍😍

What is constant though throughout is the friendliness of the people I meet, whether it's the staff at the visitor centres and in the parks, other campers or restaurant guests, or even if it's only a short "great day isn't it?" when you're passing each other on the trail or on the water. Canadians are rightly proud of their local area as well as their country, and are truly wanting to share that with others.

I've also come to realize I'm not alone in wanting to pursue my dreams as many have done so before me; from the scallops farmer in Québec to the inn owner in Ontario, several have shared with me their life trajectory often having moved away from the busy corporate/urban life to focus on what's important to them. No one has perhaps dared to tell me I'm crazy 😜 and it's surprising how many people can in some way relate to Chile 😅 so that makes me hopeful for the future!

Lastly, I wanted to share my reflection on the role that cross-country retailers like Canadian Tire, Tim Hortons and to some extent grocery stores and gas stations play in comforting travelers like me and unifying Canada as truly one country... as part of my job, I've ofcourse always known that CT has 507 stores across Canada but I've never felt what that means until now. When driving for 100-300kms in the middle of inhospitable forest without cell reception and literally only a handful of sideroads and buildings, it's comforting to know that at the end of it there will always be a place to e.g. buy a cup of tea & a donut or propane & kindling 😅. Typically, both CT and Tim Hortons will have signs 5-10km upon approach of a town (though mostly run down and overgrown 😉) and there's a real sense of relief & joy that I've been feeling seeing those signs; a combo of gladness that my car didn't break down or was hit by a moose/bear, and of happiness to be back in the familiar human realm (something like that, not sure how to explain). Secondly, it's also unifying to see the same brands in so many different places, as that creates a bond between all Canadians (in contrast, if you would drive equal distance in Europe you would likely have crossed a border with each country having its own brands/language etc). Having the same stores with the same products everywhere you go in Canada creates a commonality that clearly says: I am in Canada 🇨🇦 (actually, because CT stores are built on a standard proto design, I bought firestarters in exactly the same aisle in Pembroke as in Dryden 🤣)... I don't think this comforting & unifying aspect is apparent when you live in an urban area or only travel locally, but this roadtrip has increased my appreciation of both these Canadian brands (and I'm really not a big Tim Hortons fan although the branch in Marathon was phenomenal) .

I've rambled long enough now and need to light the fire 😃, so here's my top ten-ish of best experiences for the second month in chronological order. Scroll to my previous blogs for pictures!

1. Driving the Labrador loop including the expansive boreal forest and the Manic-5 hydro dam, QC/NL

2. Staying at Battle Harbour Island, NL

3. Seeing icebergs on the trails at Red Bay and L'Anse au Clair, NL

4 Taking the cargo boat from Blanc-Sablon to Kegashka, QC

5. Touring the Mingan archipelago (both west and east islands), QC

6. Whale watching at Cap de Bon-Désir & the Marine Discovery Centre, QC

7. Hiking the Mont du Lac-des-Cygnes at Grands-Jardins, QC

8. Meeting Nabil and spending the day in Vieux-Montreal, QC

9. SUPping at Barron Canyon & Restoule, ON

10. Hiking the pictographs trail at Lake Superior & the coastal trail at Pukaskwa parks, ON

11. Paddling on Lake Superior, ON

12. Guided PoW camp hike at Neys provincial park, ON

There's a few that I omitted such as the Manitou waterfall in eastern Québec, park La Mauricie and the Ouimet Canyon that are must-do's if you're in the area but I can't simply name everything that I did! 😉

I'll need to create better Gmaps next time I have internet on my laptop!

2nd month travel;

Total travel since 1st June;

[the-firebird69]

There are a couple more places that we're going to purchase and they are pretty big and they are going today and yeah there's going to be like a hundred things to sign or more it's going to be a big deal and he sees how it works and we're moving on it to get there

*Banks and there's a bunch so I'm going to go through it to westfalia 20%. It's not such a big Bank but it is a decent share of it and it's important, wachovia 30% this is a decent sized Bank our son has one account up in Canada in it with a bunch of money does it accrued interest he has only about 45,000 and we'll try and get it to him and others will fight it and get kicked out of the bank, Wells Fargo 20% a huge Bank number three is gigantic it really is huge, Fidelity investments and loans and mortgages and a whole bunch of financial institutions money exchange and of course tons of stock investments purchasing a 20% and it's a giant purchase it is humongously important, t Rowe Price which is number three we're purchasing 20% is a giant purchase, West valley a bank no it's westfalia investment and it's a different company no but he wants us to mention it's an investment firm and he's selling it off to 20% and his should pull out and we're going to try and buy them up of course and they own about 20% individually and that's going on today too, will be selling and we're going to be buying Bank of America 20% of people will sell there are other Banks and local money markets still put their money in, Bank of the Ozarks 30% it's a big Bank it's number eight it is gigantic it's going today, we're pretty sure it's going today. There's something more Banks one of them is a very difficult purchase someone keeps popping in and telling him no to a private meetings it's annoying as hell and there's no right to do it but they keep saying we'll absorb your share if you do it so we'll have to wait on it and it's one of the ones our son has money in and it's Greenway or something like that and yeah we're buying green we mentioned but that's a different type of company this one is a financial institution and a bank. There's a couple others one is key West Bank it is one of the banks in the Cayman Islands it has a ton of money in it ridiculous amount and we're tracking where money goes because you have to when someone passes it's hard work and we do it. BB&t 10%. That's Florida US Bank 5% and their number nine they're gigantic and a series of investment firms the varied portfolios and Banks and money markets all together they would have account for 30% of the industry it's a humongous day these are gigantic firms it's a giant number of companies the other warlock will probably sell in a few days and they've been preparing to and they think that they sell and not at all but they're going to

We're going to publish these are important companies

Thor Freya

Olympus

Good and great it's good timing on these things are important to get out these are huge firms huge companies a giant investment firms and they are going to make a difference it's humongous there's biggest oil or the Auto industry he has money and he can't get to it and people going to go after the money because they'll learn that it's true and after time probably a couple days

Hera

They said we're going to learn because it's going to be hell we told him not to sell it but they say is they're holding it and they can and he can't and he's checking and it's still there and we're going to have to fight these guys to do anything and he says you have a plan bunch of mind your own business I started to get that and you suck now you're an idiot and Mom and Dad left idiot and your mom and dad left and you became a massive idiot your mother and father and you deny it and it's because you forgot everything you ever learned honest to goodness you don't know what the hell you're talking about bja and I certainly see something mom is not doing the job right according to what she used to do and it worked the smaller need to do what they did and we are not doing it

Bja

[bastart13]

I’ve had a lot of fun recently coming with with female mercenary characters for TF2. I really liked where the concept art was going with making them all individual characters rather than simply “if the characters were women”

The design style is fantastic for distinct simplicity so I tried limiting myself to basic colours and shapes to make these

and I’m pretty confident they pass the silhouette test!

Character names/bios under the cut!

Heavy

Name: Marie Jarrett

Age: Mid 30s-40s

Height: 6’5

Nationality: American (Hawai’i)

Bio: Raised in Hawai’i, growing up she developed more and more drastic measures to fend off the tourists swarming her home. Land mines, electric gates, guard dogs, none could stop them for long until she picked up her trusty minigun to send her message. But even still, she hears the click of cameras in the night.

Eventually, she left her home to explore the world. Enthralled with the image of seeing different wonders across different countries, she’s always disappointed. She’s travelled every continent and still finds nothing that lives up to her expectations. No place, no person. She’s outgoing and open to new experiences, only she usually hates them.

Mercenary life is a great opportunity to earn money, see sights, meet new people and kill them after they don’t meet your expectations. She hates New Mexico and takes every opportunity to destroy the buildings and insult her employer’s tastes. She finds some people she tolerates within the mercenaries as she hasn’t yet visited where they live. However much she hides it, she has a deep, instinctual fear of the Engineer.

  Soldier

Name: Linda Smith

Age: Early 40s

Height: 5’10

Nationality: Canadian

Bio: Canada’s perfect woman… or so she claims. The star of war propaganda posters and clearly decided for the role because of her great tactical assets. She’s there to motivate people into the fight. To spread the glory of Canada and inspire her allies. She believes she has higher orders than anyone else she’s working for (ignoring the fact she hasn’t heard from them for a good few years) and is determined to follow them to the letter. She may have lost the letter but she remembers it good enough.

She represents the ideals of Canada: polite, friendly, apologetic, and pacifistic. None of these are contradicted by how she throws around rockets. That’s not what Canada means. She’s superior to everyone around her and graciously educates them on how to improve through example. She loves her French and British allies and will kindly tell the Americans how to be better.

She’s motivating and actually fairly competent, it’s just that competency might be misdirected. She’s damn good at rocket jumping, shooting her shotgun, and supporting her team, it’s just that you really need to get it in her head when she’s meant to be doing it.

Scout

Name: Patricia “Pat” Herald

Age: 50s-60s

Height: 5’4

Nationality: English

Bio: In her years, Patricia has learnt fear… and she’s learnt to laugh in its face. She wakes up at the crack of dawn, ready to leave at the drop of a hat, boots polished and laced the night before. Her years have taught her that with a gun and Jeremy by her side, she can survive!

The postal route of Appleby-in-Westmorland.

She’s been chased by geese, dogs, cows, elderly ladies, and when her postal route had her delivering post during the war, she developed a taste for blood. Nothing will stop her from delivering her post on time. Every day before 6am, every postbox will have their letters and parcels. One chucked across barbed wire, another house jumped over a river, another house miles into the country with dogs on her heels, she WILL get there and she’ll get there FAST.

But after a couple of decades, she needs a change of scenery, and the Gravels wars are just the holiday she’s needed. With her trusty black and white cat by her side (ignoring the yowling and scratches) she reckons it’ll be great time to enjoy herself.

Quotes: “Oh, hello, Human Jeremy.”

“Bloody fucking Ethel! Building her house out in the country… surrounded by bloody hills and rivers!”

Pyro

Name: Nikephoros Papadopoulos

Age: Late 20s

Height: 5’11

Nationality: Greek

Bio: Survival of the fittest. Nature gives and nature taketh away. If you’re not prepared for that, well, Pyro is more than happy to teach you the lesson. They embody the old values of the Greek gods: f*ck or fire. She indulges her every whim and unfortunately for the people around her it often involves arson.

One year for the Olympic games, she was given the noble title of torchbearer. On complete coincidence, the Olympics shifted to primarily water sports. Underwater sprints became the hot new trend!

She’s merry and chatty, never missing the opportunity to talk to other people about herself and her world view. She can’t wait to spread her gospel to help other people improve themselves (though she always gets a laugh out of those who go out screaming in the flames). She can’t help it if she has a sadistic side.

Engineer

Name: Mikawo Kojima

Age: Early 20s

Height: 5’0

Nationality: Japanese

Bio: Japan’s early-rising industrial revolutions in technology are best exemplified in Mikawo, a young upstart determined to rise to the top, learning everything she can and building the best of the best. Unfortunately, she’s never been the most creative but when you happen upon other people’s blueprints and happen to construct them first, what does it matter who came up with the “concept”?

At first, she appears to be every bit the quiet and demure young woman people expect, only when silk hides steel, that steel is a massive automatic sentry gun. She’s motivated by a distinct contempt for the people who get in her way. Especially those who try to be better than her. She enjoys the flexibility of English, especially the cusses, and she has no reservations about swearing up a storm, even if she still refuses to give a straight rejection, preferring instead to give a small “I’ll think about it.”

Quotes: “This GUN is fair use on your head!”

Demo

Name: Qingzhao Zeng

Age: Late 40s

Height: 5’3

Nationality: Chinese

Bio: The Zeng family has a long-standing family trade in demolitions and explosives, traced down the line all the way to the Song dynasty. Luckily, Qingzhao has sisters so, you know, it’s not all that important. She doesn’t even have to stop smoking and drinking. She hasn’t blown herself up (that much) so clearly, it’s working. Precision is for other people to worry about. She’s apathetic to a T, having seen everything. Measurements come from the heart. A pinch of gunpowder there, a splash of paint there.

Her family has a deep-seated rivalry with the DeGroots. Long ago in ancient China, a Zeng matriarch woke up in a cold sweat, a message from the stars to let them know of their Scottish rivals. Due to being a continent away from each other, the families have actually met each other only a handful of times, but the hatred needs to be kept up because, what if?

Turns out, Qingzhao has met Tavish even before finding employment under the Mann brothers. One drunken night, the two of them had a short, whirlwind friendship, sharing secrets and declaring each other to be their best friends. Luckily for them, they both forgot the night, merrily hating each other as tradition dictates. However, headaches and flashes of this terrible night haunt them both. Could they really get over centuries of hate and become friends?

Absolutely not.

Sniper

Name: Ansa Aaltonen

Age: 27

Height: 6’2

Nationality: Finnish

Bio: Snow. Sugar. Cocaine.  Her life is run by many white powders. Ansa is a professional sniper, with a sharp eye and a steady hand… when she isn’t also high as a kite, lost in the snowy wilderness of Finland and screeching to the sky. When you’re up in the dark and cold, you need something to give you a little pep in your step. It just so happens Ansa liked having a bit more pep than most.

She’s there for a THRILL. There’s nothing better to get your heart pumping at 200 beats per second than a good headshot, embracing the chill, and a hit of sugar. She no longer feels the cold or heat or even pain, shrugging it off until she collapses. It just makes her feel alive. She’s efficient, fast, and determined to get her kicks.

She has an unusual taste, living off fermented fish and tree bark. To most people around the Finnish wilderness, she’s nothing more than an urban legend, but she’s very real and she’s looking for some excitement, happily found in employment in the Gravel wars.

Spy

Name: Yvonne Pleshette [Real name N/A]

Age: 30s

Height: 5’8

Nationality: American (California)

Bio: The silver screen calls to his woman and she’s happy to answer. She trains herself to act in every possible role she can, having a wide range of accents, body languages, and backstories. To truly test herself, she gave up her identity long ago. Lately she’s been going by the name “Yvonne.”

The world of Hollywood is cutthroat and full of backstabbers so she learnt to cut throats and stab backs. While some people tell her the terms are metaphorical, nothing else has given her more roles. Living the mercenary life is simply gathering research for her roles (and earning some much-needed money in the process).

She presents herself as a classic film star, despite being a minor name at best, mostly because she’s always changing it. She has high standards but a cheapskate personality. She’s a bit of a bitch, happily criticising others, especially if they’re working with her. What can she say? She’s a diva.

[Slutshames other spy]

Quotes: “Ugh, actors these days, they know nothing about getting into character. They still have names.”

“’AHHHHH—’ Wait, no. Once more from the top. Scream in agony.”

Medic

Name: Susan Monks

Age: 30-40s

Height: 5’7

Nationality: American (New Jersey)

Bio: The American Healthcare system. Is there a more glorious sight? The exploitation of pain. The money. The debt. The fear it strikes into the entire population it’s designed to help. To Susan, there’s nothing better. She squeezes every last drop from the people she helps, working on a purely transactional lifestyle. She’ll never help someone unless she has all of their insurance information and the payment secure in her bank, and god forbid she ever accept help. It’s not like she can afford her own prices.

She’s very self-aware of her own corruption and proud of it, though she refuses to be exploited in the same way, suspicious of anything “free” but also doing her best not to pay for anything.

That said, she doesn’t much care for how good a job she does. In her eyes, asking for surgery is one thing. Asking for successful surgery is another. She has a variety of skills in both cosmetic and military medicine. She just wishes the license board would stop sending her “malpractice” letters. Ugh, stick to your own business. “Disappearing” all their messengers is becoming a pain.

Quotes: “Why get someone else to do something for you when you can scrounge a way to do it yourself?”

[donutloverxo]

A Royal Scandal 3

Modern Royal King!Steve au

(Image from Pinterest)

cowritten with @lizzygal​

Note - There will be no taglists for this. You can subscribe to the  ao3 story to receive updates!

Please note that my stories are not to be stolen or reposted on any other site. Reblogs are welcome. This blog and this story is 18+. Do not read, follow or interact if you are not 18+.

Summary - Modern ruler, His Majesty King Steven G Rogers, is on a quest to make his long term secret relationship the real thing. He is a man in love and wants his lover and partner to be his queen.

Warnings - Smut (m/f), dub con/non con, sex tape, scandals, mentions of past domestic abuse, soft dark Steve, possessive Steve, spanking, power imbalance, mentions of previous domestic abuse, somnophilia.

Pairing - King!Steve x reader

Word count - 7k

Story masterlist

Sometimes Steven forgot that you weren’t that much younger than him. He forgot about a lot of things when it was only the two of you. You did that to him. You made him forget things that everyone else reminded him of constantly, intentional and not.

Early that morning was no different.

Long before his alarm went off, Steve found himself on his side watching you sleep. Feeling in every way equal to you, like there was not this huge ocean of things that he did not have in common with you, opposed to what the two of you shared.

Obviously, he was the son of kings and tyrants while you were the daughter of immigrants and a blue-collar family. You’d grown up in a house full of love and kindness and acceptance, he had not. You’d ended your teenage years going to college and then travelling and ending up here, where you chose to stay and work and travel and live a life that Steve could only dream of, his own had never been his own and never would be.

You had dreams and hopes, little things like aspirations. He didn’t.

Steve’s life was dictated by things like duty and obligations, expectations. Yours was not.

Maybe that was why he’d been so drawn to you?

Compared to all the royals around Europe and titled individuals, politicians, even old families, none of them interested him even a fraction of the amount that you interested him. To Steve you were exotic. You were a fascinating creature who might as well have come from Mars.

He couldn’t even say what it was or why.

For so long it had felt right to be alone. Considering the blood of monsters ran through his veins, Steve had been uninterested in any sort of companionship more than a brief encounter at a private location.

For Christ’s sake, he refused to sleep in the bedroom that his father had slept in.

Upon assuming the throne, he’d selected to take up older quarters in an unused part of the palace living complex. As if to ensure he was as far away from the rooms that his father and grandfather and great-grandfather had slept. Choosing to sleep in a bed untainted by any of those men, stored from when his land was ruled by an emperor. Hoping with the hopes of a young king that it would save him from their madness.

Beside him, you slept so peacefully, trustingly.

Steve had never brought anyone into his private apartment. Nor had his bed seen any carnal action since it’d gone into storage. Until you. He’d simply never been so inclined.

A rough sound from the growth on his cheek rubbing against his pillow. A pleasant reminder of that night that felt so long ago, yet also like only yesterday.

He’d had a beard back then he remembered.

A full bushy one.

One that had made you laugh softly at, roll your eyes and still manage to pull off an acceptable bow when you greeted him that late night.

“They beat Canada then Your Majesty?” You had inquired with good nature, setting down a whole stack of papers and folders onto the very modern conference table in a big room that could fit two dozen, more if the people were standing.

He’d beamed.

Steve remembered he’d been in a particularly good mood that night. Even if he was working late on the education push into the outer regions of his kingdom. A good amount was still very rural, many simple villages that lived as they had fifty or more years ago. Many parts of his kingdom were still deeply rooted in the past.

“Indeed. Eleven to four.”

He was beaming. Beaming! You were pretty sure you could see molars. It made you shake your head and begin to sort out all your work into piles to go over. Not that you’d ever admit to secretly being caught up in the hype of the team being so close to gold at the Winter Olympics. “So then the beard stays?”

“You of all people,” he admonished, coming over to help you. Picking up the well-marked up maps you’d spent hours annotating.

Making you roll your eyes.

On he went though, obviously needing to drive home the seriousness of this matter. “The beard stays until we win gold. Next we play Norway. I don’t think it needs to be said that we cannot risk it.”

He was serious. Really serious. If that full glorious beard was any indication.

More focused on the organizing task yourself.

Sorting your work by region, pile by pile, each had taken much work and effort and negotiation, endless phone calls and trips and emails to each area to get them to work not only with you, but one another. It was like herding cats. It had taken you months to get this all sorted out for Steve to see. His ideas weren’t even ready to be implemented. This was just the pre-gaming, the leadup, the work in preparation. You weren’t even on Step One. You were on Step Zero.

“Now that I know, I’ll be sure to grow a beard next Winter Olympics.”

And then you were rewarded with a rich hearty laugh from your king.

Well not your king, as you weren’t a citizen of this country. But you still liked to think of him as your king.

Watching you sleep was something he’d never tire of. Never get enough of. It was a luxury that he didn’t realize he wanted day in out.

The ability to wake up with you tangled up in blankets. Curled back against his front. Hogging pillows as you did. Allowing Steve to run his fingers up and down your bare thigh, along the curves of your body. Letting him lean forward to press his lips to your shoulder and see the peaceful rest of your face in his slowly lightening bedroom. Every last inch of you here for him.

Hungry.

That was what it was, he was hungry for you. Like a big bear that woke from hibernation after a long winter. At times he felt such a way. Never having felt this way about anyone prior.

In his own time, he slipped his fingers down along the round of your ass underneath the flesh of your hip. Warm. Soft. Smooth. Neither of you had left the bed since the late night bath in his tub.

Further down Steve allowed his fingers to trail.

Memorizing every last second to get him through his day. From how you felt pressed against the front of him, how your back moved against his chest with every steady breath you took. The way your legs tangled in his buttery sheets with his own, how the soft cheeks of your bottom pressed against his alert groin.

Most definitely though, how your skin tasted and felt beneath his mouth. Smelling like yourself from all your favorite bath products kept in his bathroom.

You’d smelled so good that night too.

You always smelled good.

It was something that he had noticed but hadn’t given any real thought to.

It seemed to be a mix of perfume and body lotion or cream. Cause Steve found the flowery smell would linger after you walked by in the way that perfume did, infusing the air and making his brain scream out that you were near. But also, when you shook his hand, it always had that sweet fresh clean smell afterwards.

Now, whenever Steve smelled it, all he could think about was you.

Those smells danced around him. Making the late hour bearable. Making the fact that the offices were empty but for the two of you, when you both should have been home in bed, not matter.

“Ok…” you were talking to him, pointing out places on the massive map that was his nation. Arms crossed. Legs spread. Standing beside you as you informed him with tones that indicated your happiness, your displeasure as well as your utter irritation. “…so I managed to get in touch with every Education Department in all nine of your territories.”

Though you were not looking at him, Steve nodded, laser focused on this project he’d tasked you with months ago.

“All of the department heads are on board with your desired overhaul to completely modernize the entire system. Unfortunately, they told me that I had to call all the district heads for all forty-six provinces to get their agreed participation too.”

Your tone went from pleased with yourself then skeptical and then annoyed.

You turned your head to look at him. “Which is what I spent the last three months doing. It was something of a thing.”

Steve could only imagine.

He was quiet though so you could go on. More than pleased with how well you worked in this position. He’d originally been skeptical with your being a foreigner. How dedicated would you be to a job in a country that was not your own? One hundred percent as it turned out.

Your hands flattened out dramatically on the table. Outrage surged from you. “I’m still waiting on two appointees because their predecessors apparently died during harvest season and no one could be bothered to replace the position. I literally had to fly out to the outer reaches of civilization to find this out. Cause all the government offices are closed during harvest season, fyi. But they’re literally filling the positions now.”

Such was the challenge of having a large kingdom with one foot in the future and one in the past. Such things led to the difficultly of keeping a Chief of Staff.

Steve’s previous Chief of Staff had come highly recommended and lasted a little over a month.

Whether it was from a lack of dedication, the obvious frustrations of the job or maybe he simply had not wanted to jump on a plane and fly six hours then ride by car five hours to remote areas in order to complete his work. Steve could not be sure. All he knew for sure was he’d keep you as long as humanly possible.

In his eyes, you were a saint.

“What’s with the question mark?”

Making you look to see which question mark you’d marked on the map full of stickers and marks and tabs. Hours had been spent working on the damn thing.

Seeing which question mark in question made your nose scrunch. “Oh…them, they refuse to even answer my calls until they are allowed to take their traditional name for their province. Which is way above my pay grade. Someone else is going to have to deal with them. I tried.”

Ah, Steve nodded, that was far from surprising. The far outer regions were notoriously independent or rebellious, depending on your stance.

He would deal with them accordingly. Not how his father did, but in his own way.

Steve’s attention was drawn to two nearby provinces. Each had a frowny face sticker. Without asking, he merely pointed.

A noise of pure disgusted frustration came from deep in your throat. Making you stand and look to him, brandishing your hands in all directions. “I tried my best with them. I really did. Both of those provinces absolutely refuse to take part in anything if the other is involved. Apparently, they’re still salty at one another over something that happened in fourteen-seventy-three and refer to me as the foreign she-devil. So…good luck with them Your Majesty.”

Soundly you slept.

Comfortable. Safe. At peace.

Making him feel like a true man. A provider able to care for you, protect you, satisfy you. As if he were stripped down to what nature intended. Instead of what society had dictated for you both.

Reaching down to that heavenly place between the V in your thighs, Steve pushed his fingers further to find your softness slippery, your skin slick with viscous arousal. In pushing his finger up further, running it around the edge of your slit to where the gateway to your body was hidden, he found you heavily aroused. Coating his fingers with a thick fluid that promised you would be able to take him now. Oozing into the cervices between his fingers and smearing thickly down his palm and over the back of his hand.

Unable to help himself, he brought his hand out from between your legs in order to look at your arousal. Merely the sight made his balls clench in eager anticipation. Tasting the bodily excretions had his hips moving against yours on their own.

A noise came from you. Though you were far from waking. Always one to enjoy your sleep.

On his tongue you were heady, ripe. Tasting like sin. Steve licked his fingers. Eyes closed so he could savor the taste, how you clung to his tongue and were thick, like a burst of brandy swirling with his saliva.

Awakened now from his deep sleep. Ravenous like a beast of the forest. He pressed a lingering kiss to your shoulder. Making you mumble. Making you wiggle in your sleep, causing you to reach your arm out for a pillow to pull close. Hooking your leg up higher too. Becoming more comfortable in the bed in addition to opening yourself up more to your king. As if your body had connected to his on a level your mind was unaware and encouraged him to take you.

Down he peered. Strands of hair fell across his forehead at the harsh angle. A soft lightening of the sun through drapes he never closed last night allowed the sight of moisture. Folds of bare skin sheened up at him. Tempting him with that webbing of goo that promised him you were ready.

Taking himself in hand, he caught sight of your name curled over his side. Reminding him of your absolute possession over him. Sending his hand low to pull his foreskin back in order to feed this hunger of you that consumed him.

Your signature was all swoops and swirls.

Recognizable above anyone else’s writing he came across on a daily basis.

All over paper and on the maps. In little corners. Highlighted. In different color pens. On stickie notes. Written on napkins or on the back of random pieces of paper.

At the time, he’d had no idea how far gone he really was.

Not even when he watched you take note after note with a purple inked pen, your hand flowing across paper like a swimmer cutting through the water. Taking down his every word, every command.

A incredibly distinctive feeling of being full woke you up from your glorious sleep, in a very singular sort of way that could be from only one thing. Only one thing on earth felt like that when waking you up.

Pulling you out of a warm blissful sleep only to wake you with the exquisite feeling of being stretched open, pushed into, filled up. Making your fingers clench bedding or pillows or whatever they could grab.

A low breathy moan came from you in the time between you were woken and awake, your face burrowing in a pillow was followed by a soft profanity. Weight slowly covered you. Weight pinned you down to the bed a little at a time. Skin and sheets and soft dustings of hair rubbed against you.

Only when you had fully woken did you feel pubes brush against your cheeks. A light tap of scrotum bumped you too.

Long arms wrapped around you. Wet lips mouthed along the curve of your neck.

This was a far superior way to wake up. Compared to your apartment, in bed alone, to your neighbors loud shrilling alarm clock through your paper-thin wall.

Groaning out at the feel of His Majesty’s cock stuffed safely up in your secret garden. You found yourself whining at Steve at whatever time it was in the early morning. “…fuuuuck…what’d I say about doing that…” A swivel, nay, a swivel with a pop of his pelvis followed, making you see stars, gasp deeply as if you’d been stabbed in the lungs and then add on for God and Country. “…My King…shit, My King…oh shit, My King.”

Though it may have been said in jest, his tone was hot enough to scald. “If memory serves me correctly…” another deep push of thick hips shoved you forward into the pillows. “…you say, not in my ass unless I’m awake.”

Stars.

So many bright and colorful stars.

Mmm.

Yes, that was something you had told him on many occasions and it still held very true. If Steve was going to put anything in your ass, forget that thing he claimed was a dick, you needed to be fully awake so you could both physically and emotionally prepare yourself.

Nothing at all could have prepared you for the drastic turn your life was about to take that night.

Nothing.

Everything had been so normal. It was so regular. Like many a long night working late hours at the palace before. Hours had been spent going over all your hard work contacting each and every head in each education department per province, as well as per territory. In addition to the national department of education, preparing to prep them for what the king wanted.

Like any other late night, Steve helped you put all of your paperwork back in the correct order you had it in. Like every other time, he requested a palace car take you to your apartment. Granted the apartment you shared with your best friend was walking distance away. It was late and simply not safe and you found were touched that Steve would think about your well-being.

For a king, he wasn’t that bad. When it was the two of you anyway.

Looks aside, which he had in spades, he could be very funny in a sarcastic sort of way. He was very well read and intelligent, quick on his feet. Although people seemed to think of him a certain type of way based on his father and his own kingship at a young age, when he really was his own person.

You’d noticed he had a definite interest in the classical masters and had on rare occasion seen him sketch out something on a flight or during a less than stimulating event. He had an artistic ability that would never come to anything due to his role.

His strong sense of duty paired with a disgusting moral obligation pretty much guaranteed his life would be spent in service to his country. Period.

You could see why people thought he was hot. The man had been blessed by the genetic gods. Plus he was a king. Who didn’t grow up dreaming about being a princess? Or think about a literal Prince Charming from fairy tales?

Having now had the benefit of working in a real life palace. You knew the realities of that fantasy.

You had two pages of notes that could attest to the reality of your childhood Disney Princess movies.

Reality was always so different.

Not for the first time, you found yourself repeating yourself. “…and let me say one more time. Thank you so much for talking with my parents. I know it was only ten minutes, but, I know how busy you are and it just completely topped off their visit. My mother has been telling everyone about how she met the king. You even have my father cheering for the hockey team.”

A smile came over Steve’s face that was real.

It wasn’t one of his practiced smiles. It was an actual smile. You could tell because it reached his eyes.

“Well,” Steve answered you with a shrug, sounding genuinely pleased even if he also sounded tired and like he wanted nothing more than to go off to his living quarters in the palace and crash into bed, before he had to get up to start a new day. Helping you stack the last of your papers up. “Anything to convert a soul to hockey. Technically, it is his team too.” And because he could not help himself, Steve added on, “Even if his grandparents fled from here for a cushy life in the west.”

Up your hand flew to your chest.

Your jaw dropped in mock pain. “Ouch, Sir! That one was painful.”

His smile grew at your over-the-top reaction.

Still though, he dipped his head and you noticed there was a little blush on his cheeks above where that magnificent beard grew. Chagrined, he quickly followed up with, “I apologize. That was a cheap shot.”

In a physical sort of way that his people were known to interact, personal space be damned, Steve reached over to touch your arm apologetically. Not something he did frequently. Although he had done it a handful of times. The press of his mouth to your cheek was new. The little kiss was brand new. Steve’s lips were gentle on your skin. His beard tickled your face.

Never in your life had your heart pounded as violently in your chest as it did at that gesture. Quickly, your head turned. Though you did not move back or say anything. Instead, you found yourself staring at Steve. Looking into those pools of blue that were looking at you with the same amount of surprise that you felt. His lips were right there, right there.

Blood roared in your ears, your heart pounded faster and faster and faster.

He kissed you.

Did he really though?

Was it a kiss or was it a kiss?

For a moment in time, you leaned in. Leaned closer. Leaned till you almost touched him because that was what your body wanted to do. Until you remembered that Steve was a king. A KING. Remembering that made your head command your body to lean backwards a bit. Allowing you to see that he had leant in to meet you.

He’d leaned closer to kiss you.

What were you doing? What in the hell were you doing? You had no business doing this, no business at all messing around with Steve.

Fingers moved along your arm, tracing up the back of it softly. That simple touch made goosebumps break out over your skin. It made your breath hitch. Your hands began to shake so you grabbed the fabric of your skirt.

However, you made no move to step away from Steve. Nor did he make any sort of move to step away from you.

Another attempt at a kiss was not made.

Fingers touched your face instead. Steve was close enough to you that you felt his legs brush yours. You felt his breath against your face. Fingertips ran across the swell of your cheekbone, down over your lips, tracing the bridge of your nose in what felt like a desire to memorize your face.

Steve was gentle. His fingertips felt like feathers on your skin. He made you shake like a leaf in terror because you wanted him to touch you more. You wanted to be touched. You wanted to feel his hands on you and the soft glide of his thumb along the line of your jaw was painfully insufficient.

Without thinking, you reached up with your hands until you remembered that he was the king.

Were you allowed to touch the king? You weren’t sure. He was touching you and it was fabulous but were you allowed to do the same? You wanted to. You so deeply wanted to. You just were not sure what was allowed in this situation. It had not exactly been covered in the Royal Protocol Guidebook you had.

Then came Steve’s voice. Harsh. Gravelly. Desperate.

“Touch me. It’s ok. I want you to.”

For only a heartbeat or two you remained still, observing him, making sure. Only after that did you reach up with your hands to cover his wrists. Rub along the fabric of his button-up shirt. In doing so, you not only felt the strength in his well-muscled wrists, or how warm the silky fabric was, but, you could feel him tremble. He was shaking about as much as you were.

A rush of air surged from his lungs as if you had burnt him.

Curious, you turned your head so you could place a single kiss on the inside of his hand touching your face, right at the base of his thumb. In doing so, you ripped a noise from deep within him. A noise that was both pained while also infused with wanting.

“This is ok?”

“Yes,” he croaked out, as if he were terrified you would stop.

Never would you have ever imagined he would be so responsive. Almost touch starved it felt.

Sometimes, Steve still felt as if he were a little touch starved to you. Sometimes it felt like he’d gone his entire life without having that physical connection between two people. As complicated of a man as he was with as complicated of a life as he had, you at times forgot that he was still a human being with human being needs that were essential to thriving.

And it wasn’t like you were complaining.

Far from it.

Not after the orgasm you just had, not from on top of him either. Lounged across the front of him. Loose limbed. Languid down to your marrow. Peppering the damp skin of his neck with slow wet kisses and scrapes of teeth. Long drags of your tongue collected drops of salt that tasted of him. Lazily. Heart to heart. Stomach to stomach.

There really were worse ways to wake up.

Like, for instance, in your apartment taking cold showers cause the building’s water heater was ancient. That wasn’t fun at all and usually had you shivering and hurrying through an icy shower. Straight up not a good time.

This? This was soooo much better.

Feeling Steve’s long legs wrapped up in your own, paired with his softening member filling you by virtue of sheer size not letting himself just pop out…this was a much better way to wake up. Far superior in every way.

Not that you were willing to waste precious time like this luxuriating in post-coital bliss. No, no. A burning question was hot on your mind that kept popping up after last night. After all, you were a modern woman and this was a serious relationship. You had every right to ask this question at any time you wanted. Even now. As your boyfriend, the king, fondled your breasts in his hands with such intensity that you would have thought he’d just broken out of Alcatraz after a decade of no nookie. Not that you were in the least bit complaining. Not one bit.

“Am I going to have to quit my job?”

It was something of a concern.

You loved your job. You loved working with Steve. You loved your life as it was and a big part of you suspected becoming queen would mean big changes.

Not that you lifted your head from his neck, or ceased your trek down towards his collarbone. Trail of your kisses never slowing or stopping. No hint of any sort of disruption came. Not for a moment or two. Not till your ravenous boyfriend squeezed your breasts possessively. Thumbed your nipples and finally opened his eyes, as if it were the biggest chore on earth.

His voice was rough. His tone felt like hot gooey honey that just got everywhere. “No…not yet…”

Leading you to make a noise. A pop followed when your mouth left the dark spot you’d been sucking on nearly at his collarbone. What with your name already etched on him. What else could you leave in a display of ownership over him? “Nothing else to add My King?” For added emphasis, perhaps you gave you vaginal muscles a clench knowing what that did to him.

A grunt came from beneath you.

Wrapped up in yours, Steve’s legs clenched in response to what you did. White teeth sank into his upper lip and you absolutely thrived at the sight and feel of him arching up against you, shifting around beneath you at the way your body squeezed him.

Those hands left your breasts only to reach down, run over your waist as they had so many times before, leading you to grab them. Snatch then right up. Press them down into the mattress over Steve’s head. Since the man was far larger than you, this sent you leaning downwards and ever closer to his face. “Steve? I asked you a question.”

How easy it would have been for him to get free. Yet, he seemed content where he found himself. Still wedged within you. Warm in bed. Body a sea of a complex cocktail of chemicals after physically releasing into you. A far better way to wake up than alone in a massive bed. Or worse, to his mother jabbing at him to urgently tell him something that was not urgent at all.

Feeling your breasts press against his chest. Lightly brushing over his skin, your nipples little points that sparked a definite interest in his dick.

God did he want you to be his queen.

“Not yet,” Steve ground out, nearly close to being overwhelmed by you. Each and every word was enunciated to utter perfection, as if it took all of his concentration and effort to get them out. “I’ll have the palace leave your name out of the official statement today. We can go slow. Ease you into things…ease you out of your job…” and to reward him for such a thoughtful statement, you clenched around him once more.

However, it seemed, there was more and even though his eyes rolled up into his head at the feel of your core squeezing his not entirely soft organ, he pushed on with the determination of his ancestors. Grunting. Arching back into the bed as the pillows had all wound up on the floor. Perfect teeth clenched together. “M-my people…will…love you…too.”

So, it was entirely possible, that you were feeling all kinds of powerful watching him writhe beneath you. Knowing exactly what sort of repercussions this could have to your morning. Which was still progressing on time. It was entirely possible that you may have intentionally pushed your own pelvis against his to reseat yourself.

“Oh yeah? How can you be so sure? You saw what happened with those two over in England. And that prince isn’t even next in line to the throne.”

Perhaps it was the seriousness of the direction in which your conversation had taken, Steve remained beneath you. Taking no action, even though you could quite literally feel his dick grow more interested in what your hips were doing.

A panted out, “…fuck…” escaped from him, before he opened his eyes to look at you seriously, if not also a little heatedly. “Quit obsessing over them. The King of Jordan married for love. Queen Rania was a commoner. If you must, focus on them.”

Sudden movement found you falling off Steve and onto the bed, shoved onto your back and in a flash, he was on top of you again. Over you. Hovering. Though he’d escaped out of your body, you could feel the king’s most delicious semi, slick from your previous copulation, squish between you both.

Admitting on an exhale, “Forgot about them.”

“Everyone does.” He agreed, surveying down, taking in the sight of you. “My country appreciates you. They’re fond of you. You’re in all the papers and they’ve given you a nickname.”

And that. That. Nearly killed the mood.

It sent your eyebrows together dubiously so.

Everytime you were in the press it was when your skirt had been blown up on a windy day, or if you’d accidentally gotten food on your shirt. Or that time a baby goat pooped on your shoes. Or when you’d tripped and fallen off a dock into a lake. Who could forget that time you’d accidentally called the Prime Minister of Canada a ‘moose fucking cannibal’ when you’d still been getting the hang of the language, your first year on the job?

You’d been affectionately dubbed, ‘the King’s Foreign Devil’ and it had stuck.

Hell, you still got asked about your thoughts on the Canadian Prime Minister whenever a member of the press was around.

“Most the time, you have a higher approval rating than I do,” he added. Much to the consternation of Maria Hill in PR. “Trust me. There is nothing my country loves more than a hard-working loyal servant of the people who talks shit about western leaders.”

Mood totally killed, you seethed and not for the first time, “That was an accident! I was trying to call him Canada’s Disney Prince.”

***

The note had been hand delivered to the palace and was now crumbled into a ball in the Queen Mother’s bedroom as she stormed off, once more, that early morning in a fury of rose satin and silk. Her perfume clouded around her, drifting behind her, much like the wake of a boat cutting through the water.

Thick carpets silenced her heels. Doors opened for her as she neared them, allowing her to not need to slow her step even for a second. Not a single moment wasted as she made her way through the private living quarters of the palace.

Down hallways and around corners, over to the rooms that her grown son had selected as his own.

It would have been so much easier if he would have just taken the rooms that his father had lived in.

Although, with the horrific memories attached to those rooms, how could she blame him when he elected not to? She had her own private rooms. The dead kings rooms were locked up tight and still not used. Abandoned like so much he’d done, started and accomplished in his life.

Upon coming to her only child’s rooms, those doors were held open for her and on she pressed on. Sailing through his rooms, one after another, until she got closer to his bedroom and could hear his shower which was the direction she headed.

A brief glance was made at the mess that was his bed.

A roll of her eyes was followed by a shake of her head.

Some things males never grew out of it seemed.

“Steven!” She called out in warning, should he be in the bathroom about to come out in the nude. Which was the last thing she wanted to see.

Not only was his bed a mess but his clothes from yesterday were all over the floor.

She had every intention of telling him that he needed to straighten up this mess before the cleaning staff came in his room. The last thing she wanted was for them to think he was messy and then tell their families and friends when they went home that the king had a messy bedroom and word would get out that her son was a slob. Ugh. No. She’d make sure that he straightened up.

Speaking of the devil.

As his shower ran, Steve peered out of the bathroom with a wet head. A midnight blue towel was wrapped around his waist. A toothbrush was in his hand. To Sarah, it was very clear that her grown son had not shaved yet either.

Seeing him in such a state that morning along with his messy room and the fact the shower was going wasting water. It did not make her mood any more agreeable.

Though her son was taller than her and considerably more muscular, she never feared him.

She knew he would never hurt her like his father had so many times. Towards the end, Steve had even defended her from his father’s physical attacks. Those days. They had been dark. Horrible. Terrible. When she noticed that her husband had begun to carry a knife to protect himself from his son. Well. What was she supposed to do?

Attacking her was one thing. Being violent towards her was one thing. There were some things that she learned to tolerate. It was unescapable. Their son though. To take a knife to their son? Her son? Sarah would never allow such a thing.

She was queen at the time.

It was not so difficult to get the drug that she put in her husband’s evening nightcap. She’d used all of it. Thrown the vial away the next day when she went to rouse the king as she did every morning, only to find him dead in his chair. Fireplace having long gone out. Slumped down. Cold. The coroner had said it was a heart attack. Exactly as she’d been told the drug would work. He’d been buried with no one the wiser. Not even Steve.

“Yes mother?”

Sarah rolled her eyes. “You are not growing another beard. Last time you looked like some man that lives up in the mountains in a tiny shack.”

Just as her own father once did, Steve’s eyebrows rose in surprise and question.

No. That was not why she was here.

Sarah had a higher calling that morning and straightening her slim shoulders, she so informed him. “Hope and Janet are here in the city. They’ve come for a surprise visit and will arrive at the palace within the hour.”

Steve’s eyes narrowed at her in response to her information.

It was horrifying. It was outrageous. It was not what he wanted to hear that morning one bit. Not at all. Not one single bit.

Hope and Janet?

Those were two names he never wanted to hear with the additional words being, ‘on their way’. No. Just no.

All he could say that was remotely civil, after what the then Princess Hope van Dyne had done, came out in something of a tone. “I don’t want to see either of them. If you want to see them, that’s your choice. Keep them away from me.”

Considering what the now Duchess Hope had spewed to every reporter, journalist and whomever with a platform…Sarah was a little surprised that Steve was being so kind.

She’d expected a bit more of a reaction from her son.

Could she be holding a bigger grudge against her one-time closest friend’s daughter? After what had happened, Queen Janet van Dyne had become somewhat distant. Which was not surprising. Hope had not broken the engagement gracefully. Nor had she been anything less than opinionated afterwards.

“I suspect she is in trouble,” Sarah confessed. “Why else would they come here? Considering everything that Hope has said over the years.”

Steam continued to seep through the cracked door.

Sarah was about to say something about the shower. Steve was wasting a considerable amount of hot water. She herself was leading the Go Green Initiative in the country and as she stated constantly, it all began at home.

“Mother, don’t take this the wrong way, but, I wouldn’t shit in Hope’s mouth if she was starving.”

Ah.

Perhaps she’d been too quick to judge Steve’s current opinion on the wayward duchess?

Pondering his statement, Sarah found herself looking for any way to come back with a counter when she noticed that the shower turned off. Which was odd. Shower’s didn’t turn themselves off.

What was even more peculiar, Steve reached back behind himself to shut his bathroom door.

It clicked.

Like a light going off.

How could she not have noticed? How could it not have been obvious?

Blue eyes that were a little softer than her son’s narrowed. “You aren’t alone.”

Silence.

Quiet.

Her pink lips opened in surprised. A question hovered on her tongue.

“No mother.”

“But…”

“Mother,” he implored as only a son could. “Not now. She would not want the first time she officially meets you to be when you’re dressed for the day and she is not.”

And though her son’s words were true. They were right. They were exactly what she would have wanted him to say and because she had raised him well, she was even proud that he had made such a quick decision. It wasn’t fair.

Sarah wanted to find out who you were. She wanted to meet the woman that her son was involved with. Was that so wrong? Sarah wanted to meet the woman that her son was considering marrying. There was so much she wanted to say to you, so much to teach you, so much she wanted to learn about you. Perhaps her desperation showed because her son reached out to place a hand on her elbow.

“If you can chase Hope and Janet away, we could have lunch together. The three of us. If not, dinner? Or even tomorrow. I’m not doing anything with Hope under this roof. Not after she referred to our country as a third world plus hellhole full of war criminals and superstitious backwoods heathens.”

Ah, so he did remember.

Those words had been seared into her memory as well. Sometimes Sarah wondered, as Steve had never really given much indication that he cared one way or the other what Hope had said. It was only after she began to speak unflatteringly about their people that he grew irritated, much like herself.

Although, what irritated Sarah more, was the quiet that came from the royal house of van Dyne and Pym a few countries over. Never once had Janet spoke up. Never had Janet said anything about her daughters outrageous remarks or behavior. Nor had she apologized.

Knowing her son, Sarah knew that he would never court anyone who was not kind or compassionate. Steve would never pick a Hope as his queen.

Up came a hand that bore a lovely ring decorated with fresh water pearls from their own waters. “I’ll have them gone before lunch and then we will all sit down together so I can finally meet her.”

[golbrocklovely]

since i haven't done one of these in a hot minute…

here are more of colby’s tweets from 2018.

i don’t have proof that these are his tweets, but believe me, they are his.

if it’s bold and italicized, it’s someone’s tweet to him.

if it’s in (), that’s just me commenting lol

~~~~~~~~~~~

July 2 - crazy how the smallest things in life are what makes you most happy

July 3 - everyone’s crazy in their own way

in the grand scheme of things nothing really matters unless it matters in your mind

July 6 - i need to start being nicer to myself

July 7 - being on stage is fun. thanks for making this experience possible

July 8 - my brain clears as soon as i leave LA

i’m gunna name my daughter brock so everybody calls her BROCK BROCK HAHA

(the juxtaposition between these past two tweets sksksk)

July 9 - sometimes life seems like a big blurry cycle of the same daily motions

lost or free

July 11 - hiding out in a forest from cops right now in the middle of Ontario, Canada i wonder what we’re gunna eat for dinner

July 13 - thankful that u exist

July 17 - i wanna get tattoos all over i just need to find testicles to do it first

July 19 - can’t wait to take a break from my phone for a little bit .. you’ll see why soon

July 20 - her power is in her words

(i feel like he's tweeted this before… but i'm not sure when)

July 29 - hey guys, in case you forgot about me my name’s colby, but you can call me C-man

Aug. 4 - you all changed my life so imma do everything in my power to change yours

what’s up with the grandmas at meet and greets who constantly are grabbing my ass? like i know it’s fat, but damn

Aug. 10 - some days i sit here thinking there’s something wrong w me

everyone out here tryna do the same sh*t

Aug. 11 - i will love you till the day i decay

dear insecurities, please go far far away please and thank you. maybe a trip to Madagascar with no returning flight? just a suggestion. sincerely, my inner thoughts xx

Aug. 14 - separating a home environment and a work environment is SO important to get lots of work done

(i just want to make a quick note that this time period is when i just got into the fandom, and i can distinctly remember all of these tweets as they were coming out lol)

Aug. 16 - lol mom isn’t too happy i talked to demons

Aug. 19 - i hate how people nowadays are acting and dressing dark/emo just because it’s a popular trend be your damn selves

Aug. 21 - the people who don’t care about superficial things like social status, money, being cool etc. are the ones who will be THE most successful in life

ITS ALL ABOUT LIGHTING AND ANGLES BABY

show me the side of u that no one else sees

escape her in the day but she find me in my dreams

(he was really in his feelings this day, huh)

Aug. 25 - black on black on black

Aug. 26 - learning how to become best friends with myself

fighting to be remembered

just got on stage dressed as a koala. tour was so amazing <3 but all amazing things come to an end. thank you all for everything. love you so much

(wow this was the last time they were on tour… that really makes me sad 🙁)

Aug. 27 - there’s a HUGE difference between being open minded and being crazy

Sept. 1 - whenever i’m feeling sad i just eat a massive amount of taco bell

Sept. 4 - you ever just wonder how it’s even possible for someone to be so perfect ?

Sept. 10 - i’ll always be around

Sept. 11 - i wear the same jeans every day

Sept. 15 - if people act like they don’t care and don’t wanna give me the time of day , of course i’m gunna reciprocate the feeling

Sept. 16 - if i get arrested this week mom i’m sorry in advance

i’m happiest when i can be off my phone and live in the moment ironic that this is my main job always gotta remind myself to take breaks

Sept. 17 - i feel like i only tweet late at night

Sept. 18 - overall, mental health is number one your happiness is what matters most

i absolutely hate starting things i can’t finish

Sept. 19 - everything is connected you make your own destiny. don’t be fooled it’s more simple than you think

i just want a special girl i can take to the beach at night so we can point out the constellations and have our own lil picnic

(why can’t he tweet like this anymore ??? 🥺)

Sept. 21 - random thought: 100s of fireflies on a warm summer evening in Kansas .. walking in the park w my mom. it’s those moments i’ll cherish most

Sept. 25 - there’s just somethin about you

my job is to make you feel special.. important.

if i die and did not do that, then i’ve failed

Sept. 26 - people said when i moved to LA I would change .. and they were right! i did. a lot. but constant change is inevitable.. i would HATE to be the person i was 4 years ago embrace the change. it’s not always bad

Sept. 28 - i’ll never have respect for unloyal people

yo a squirrel just threw a nut at me, smacked me in the back of the head

[natromanxoff]

Queen live at Montreal Forum in Montreal, QC, Canada - July 21, 1982

(x)

Brian May would later recall Hot Space as a "failed attempt at doing funk properly." After listening particularly to side A of Hot Space, many North American fans saw Queen as having shifted from being leaders and trend-setters to being followers, and that they simply no longer rocked. However, the live band Queen (they always were essentially two different bands, as much of their music had to be rearranged to suit the live environment) still did rock, as the Hot Space material translated to the live environment very well. Tonight, and on this tour as a whole, the band put more energy into performing the newer material than the old.

Unlike past tours, most reviews of their concerts on the 'Rock N' America' Tour were very positive, often speaking of the technical aspects of the show. Indeed, Queen continued to be leaders in their stage presentation. The lighting rig had once again been upgraded and was state-of-the-art for the time. The light show worked to its maximum potential during Brian's guitar solo, providing dazzling effects in sync with certain bits of what he was playing.

American rocker Billy Squier would support Queen at every show on what would be their final tour of North America. Brian May would end up playing guitar on Billy's next album, a song called "(Another) 1984." Some people in the crowd booed Squier tonight, but generally speaking the reviews of his set on this tour were complimentary.

On keyboards, Morgan Fisher has been replaced by Fred Mandel. Fred would remain with the band for the rest of the year, and would also play piano on "Man On The Prowl" on Queen's next album, The Works. Interestingly enough, Freddie doesn't introduce Mandel at the first couple shows, while he introduced Morgan Fisher at every show in Europe.

They have dropped The Hero and wisely open with Rock It, as they are well aware of how successful The Game was on this side of the Atlantic. For this opening show of the tour, Queen would show their confidence in the new material by playing six songs from Hot Space.

Brian's opening night jitters kick in early as he begins the concert by playing Rock It in D instead of A. When Freddie sings the first line, he knows it's way too high, and says to Brian, "wrong key!" Brian then seamlessly switches to the arpeggiated A chord and then they get the show rolling. They play the song a key lower than the original probably to ensure Freddie sings it well every night. For much of the tour, the coda of Rock It merges into a brief snippet of the fast version of We Will Rock You. Action This Day follows, making this tour the only time they would effectively open the show with two Roger Taylor songs.

Somebody To Love appears only occasionally on this tour, and Love Of My Life wouldn't be played at all. Calling All Girls, however, has been introduced to the set, as it has recently been released as a single - the first Queen single penned by Roger Taylor. Although this song wouldn't bring them much success, Roger would write two massively successful songs in the next few years - Radio Ga Ga and A Kind Of Magic. The latter would be a number one hit in dozens of countries in 1986, making Queen the only band whose members all wrote a number one song.

Body Language is a huge hit on this side of the Atlantic, so the band feel it's right to use it as the first encore number. It definitely goes down well, unlike its brief stint in the setlist in Europe. They opt for a more concise version of the song without the first verse or the drawn-out ending. I have spoken with many people who saw Queen on this tour, many of whom didn't like much of the Hot Space album - but the common thread between them all was how great the new songs sounded on stage, particularly Body Language.

Megadeth/Eidolon drummer Shawn Drover attended this show, aged 16 at the time.

The show is comparatively shorter than on previous tours, as the band are on stage for about 90-95 minutes each night.

For the rest of 1982, Roger Taylor's bass drum skin would be of the artwork from his solo single My Country.

The first picture was submitted by Maxime Guay. The second one was taken by Tracy Runas.

(x)

Fan Stories

“Hey I forgot to mention...the stub is for rouge 47 loge J siege 9. I was visiting an army buddy on my way to Nova Scotia that lived in Montreal. We were just walking around old Montreal and up St. Catherine’s ave, as we neared the forum we saw this fellow dragging a portable sign out to the street. It said QUEEN concert tonight....tickets available (in French but it was to that affect), the guy said that the stage was all erected and lighting in place and the seats just became avail. I believe he said there were around 200 scattered seats in all. Also I pulled my stub back just as the usher tried to tear it, QUEEN appears in full lol.” - John Kennington

[abouttoplaymy-ace]

🐣🐨🦔🐢🐄🐸🐧🦭

DID YOU LIKE MY COUNTDOWN!? That was fun! I had fun. That was actually more fun than I thought it would be! There were too many good posts to name. It was very fun reading all your comments and theories.  Though side note: animal anon has no problem with people joining her BUT it must be animals and it must not mess with my countdown. No statues! Animal anon does animals, not statues. Side side note: can someone settle the debate of if that emoji is a hedgehog or a porcupine? Because I have no idea. Side note side note side note: sorry if you got multiple asks in a day...my system isn't perfected yet so sometimes I send two (or three) because I forgot I sent one and didn't want to accidently miss anyone (also sorry if i did miss you, still perfecting the system, no one has been animal anon blacklisted, i promise!)

Anyway, GUESS WHAT TODAY IS!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 It's been one year since I started animal anon! How exciting is that?! Phew, what a year we've had together! I mean what better way to start this second year than some chaos since that's how animal anon started to begin with! I will admit, it was slightly stressful coming up with something to meet the occasion of this event. I hope the countdown and this post live up to it. No, I'm not going to reveal myself just yet.. maybe that will be for year 2...😏😏. BUT I will give you some fun facts about me! So let's see; first, I'm from the Midwest (so not Canadian, but close so I do have a slight accent), but I currently live in the TriState area. Second, I am a MASSIVE theater nerd. No, seriously I have been to 21 shows since Broadway reopened in September and I'm actually going to my 22nd tonight. I don't know if this makes that fact better or worse, but I've really only been to about 12 different show because out of those 22, 10 of those are one specific show. Third, I am fluent in German and English. Though, I suck at writing in German, I never learned how to, so don't ask me to do that please. Fourth, my favorite color is red, so you can guess my favorite Taylor album (and coincidently also the show I've been to see 10 times on Broadway...). Fifth, I love to talk A LOT if you couldn't tell by the essays I send yall. And lastly, I can also confirm I am not Taylor...but I will say that I do share something very important with her... tell me your guesses down below as to what very important thing you think Taylor and I have in common, and I'll send some extra animals to whomever I see gets it right first!

So contuining on with my dissertation here, this week I have been trying to figure out a prompt to live up to this occasion. As I already mentioned, my system isn't perfect! And I've been thinking a lot about community lately and how that's been lacking for so many because of Covid. So what I want yall to do is if you get this dissertation of mine, please send a message, post, anon, whatever you want to at least 1 other blog (though you can do more), telling them something you like about them and giving them an animal emoji! That way we can keep spreading the love all day long to as many as possible! 🥰

As always, you are all brilliant, kind, worthy, beautiful and as this past week has shown, hilarious and unique human beings. No seriously, some of your posts had me kneeling over in laughter. If you would so like, you can tag #animalanon so I and everyone can read all your lovely posts! IM STARTING EARLY TODAY SO WE CAN PARTY ALL DAY LONG BECAUSE I LOVE YALL SO MUCH 🎊 🦥🦁🐯

Omg happy anniversary animal anon!!! 🎉 We all love you so much <3333 The chaos was 10/10 thank you for the entertainment you’re an icon!!

It’s so nice to hear more about you!! I am also from the Midwest not too far from Canada! Maybe I know you 👀 I ALSO love theatre but wouldn’t consider myself an expert by any means but you sound like you’re living the dream 🤩 and I also also love Red! I go back and forth on if it’s my favorite or rep (tho Red TV I think pushed it to #1 ❤️) So we have a lot in common!!

I’m going to guess what you have in common with Taylor issss… you have 3 cats?? 🐱

I love your idea for spreading the love! Bringing the light to the fandom, as always! I hope you have a wonderful anniversary!!! 🐳🦚🐇🦒🐘🐬🦉🦄🐝🦕🐙

[that-soccer-guru]

Hi! Would love to hear your thought on how you think each uswnt player played today!

oof okay, well I'm ngl to you my dear anon, I was rooting hard against the US today. THEREFORE I wasn't paying all the attention to the players, but I can't help but criticize so here we go.

Wanna know what I did see though, clear as day? A struuuuuuggling USWNT.

Look, Canada figured it out for a bit, but there's no reason the uswnt should've been lacking so much. There was a massive disconnect in the midfield, the defense was not positioned well at all, and they were counting too much on Canada fucking up than on creating chances.

The game didn't get good until the subs started coming in and by then that became a necessity when Canada had two very good chances and those hurt me deeply too because there's no reason Prince shouldn't have taken them—the curse of being too Canadian and wanting to share. Against a team that is missing a bulk of their starters? This should've been more dominant for the US. GRANTED, Canada at its worst its still not a team of slouches, and it showed, but I expected more from the US.

Ertz and Horan were not on their A game, obviously the US v Canada rivalry is usually really physical, and once the ref stopped blowing the whistle at every little shove, it got more tactical and a lot more violent. Horan did drop a few players like a sack of potatoes so at least she got that much. But she was out of position and out of sync a lot.

Pinoe was NOT having a good game either. When she was in the plays she was not in lockstep with the team around her, and when she wasn't in the plays she was way out of wack with what was happening around her.

Carli Lloyd failing at her shots made me happy so I won't complain. She was having a slightly better game though.

I was actually pretty impressed with Lynn! She found ways through the defense really effectively and was open for a lot of dangerous shots. Obviously that's also a product of Canada trying to find their feet, but overall it wasn't half bad! While it hasn't changed my mind about her position in this team, I do think she's one of the best parts of this discombobulated squad so far.

Dahlkemper and Broon, on point as always, except for how far up or down they would move the defensive line. The defense decisions weren't always there.

Dunn suffered from trying to do too much up ahead and not always being well positioned in the backline, so she wasnt great but she didn't suck and that's a plus. Midge had a similar problem of trying to do too much—the problem? she has to find a way to settle into a spot that she's not used to, and by doing a lot up ahead she's not honing on those defense skills they want her to have. Which like, it means for a lot of people she doesn't look game ready. She needs to be less scattered, and Vlatko needs to stop wanting her in the back. Between those two things I think Midge buckling down is more likely.

Cat didn't have the greatest game, same as the team she was just a second too slow and a bit too out of step with the passes and choices. But I'm not gonna slam her like a lot of people, it's her third cap, her first major international tournament, and you can't expect her to have a perfect game everytime or to bring in crazy vibes to a team that was so disconnected. I hope she has a better game next time, this wasn't bad? but it wasnt great. gives her something to work on.

Rose, Pressy, flawless as always. Velvety touch, ace positioning, great read for the game. They really brought this thing alive. Kmew I didn't see much of but her instincts are very good, she had good moments, I wish she had started or come in earlier so I could really make an informed opinion about her. Overall though she held the poorly put together game together and I can respect it.

Alex Morgan I added to this thing late bc I realized I forgot she was even here and that says all I need to say about her performance today.

Krueger (nee Short), she's out there doing her thing and I respect it. She kinda tried to reposition the backline and close the flank and I think she did p good with the time she had! Sonnett also did v good in pushing forward. Again, the LB and RB suffer from having to do too much but I do think the little time she was on the field she was better at the defending than Midge. But in a game so out of wack and with such a small sample size, eh.

Naeher, as always, v good. Although she did leave the goal open that one time and she's lucky that the Canadians lack someone without a Canadian soul willing to just SHOOT AT THE FUCKING GOAL.

Overall? I am less than impressed. If they play this way against Brazil they might get their first loss in a while. And that's saying a lot bc Brazil also didn't have the best game going in, but they got it together in the end.

SORRY FOR THE LONG POST BUT I HOPE THAT COVERED IT?

[the-green-dot]

🐣🐨🦔🐢🐄🐸🐧🦭

DID YOU LIKE MY COUNTDOWN!? That was fun! I had fun. That was actually more fun than I thought it would be! There were too many good posts to name. It was very fun reading all your comments and theories.  Though side note: animal anon has no problem with people joining her BUT it must be animals and it must not mess with my countdown. No statues! Animal anon does animals, not statues. Side side note: can someone settle the debate of if that emoji is a hedgehog or a porcupine? Because I have no idea. Side note side note side note: sorry if you got multiple asks in a day...my system isn't perfected yet so sometimes I send two (or three) because I forgot I sent one and didn't want to accidently miss anyone (also sorry if i did miss you, still perfecting the system, no one has been animal anon blacklisted, i promise!)

Anyway, GUESS WHAT TODAY IS!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 It's been one year since I started animal anon! How exciting is that?! Phew, what a year we've had together! I mean what better way to start this second year than some chaos since that's how animal anon started to begin with! I will admit, it was slightly stressful coming up with something to meet the occasion of this event. I hope the countdown and this post live up to it. No, I'm not going to reveal myself just yet.. maybe that will be for year 2...😏😏. BUT I will give you some fun facts about me! So let's see; first, I'm from the Midwest (so not Canadian, but close so I do have a slight accent), but I currently live in the TriState area. Second, I am a MASSIVE theater nerd. No, seriously I have been to 21 shows since Broadway reopened in September and I'm actually going to my 22nd tonight. I don't know if this makes that fact better or worse, but I've really only been to about 12 different show because out of those 22, 10 of those are one specific show. Third, I am fluent in German and English. Though, I suck at writing in German, I never learned how to, so don't ask me to do that please. Fourth, my favorite color is red, so you can guess my favorite Taylor album (and coincidently also the show I've been to see 10 times on Broadway...). Fifth, I love to talk A LOT if you couldn't tell by the essays I send yall. And lastly, I can also confirm I am not Taylor...but I will say that I do share something very important with her... tell me your guesses down below as to what very important thing you think Taylor and I have in common, and I'll send some extra animals to whomever I see gets it right first!

So contuining on with my dissertation here, this week I have been trying to figure out a prompt to live up to this occasion. As I already mentioned, my system isn't perfect! And I've been thinking a lot about community lately and how that's been lacking for so many because of Covid. So what I want yall to do is if you get this dissertation of mine, please send a message, post, anon, whatever you want to at least 1 other blog (though you can do more), telling them something you like about them and giving them an animal emoji! That way we can keep spreading the love all day long to as many as possible! 🥰

As always, you are all brilliant, kind, worthy, beautiful and as this past week has shown, hilarious and unique human beings. No seriously, some of your posts had me kneeling over in laughter. If you would so like, you can tag #animalanon so I and everyone can read all your lovely posts! IM STARTING EARLY TODAY SO WE CAN PARTY ALL DAY LONG BECAUSE I LOVE YALL SO MUCH 🎊 🦥🦁🐯

HI ANIMAL ANON!!! im so happy!!! lets celebrate!!! thank you for so much fun. kinda disappointed we're not getting speak now tv soon, but ig it'll be okay!!! i have literally zero clue who you could be. im also from the midwest! not super close to canada, i live in lower michigan. again, thank you for SO much fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was enchanted to meet you, animal anon <3