#please do not hurt the form you inhabit even if it is not your own

[species-dysphoria-culture-is]

Therian species dysphoria culture is knowing you never ever will be an animal in this life. No matter how much you cry, bleed, scream, rip your body parts off...You will NEVER be an animal, the chances of you being one in the next life is so slim that you can't even say for sure. And maybe the world will end by then, and you won't have the chance to live the life you wanted, the life you craved for so long. You won't really have those limbs you wanted, the freedom you wished. And you just cry...knowing it won't help at all. You stare at the stars, maybe even the sun at dawn. You look back down at your human feet, asking yourself if it's true...if it's true you're just a helpless small human. You envy your own skin, you're jealous of those animals living life so differently than you, not having to be under control of government, not having to feel such complex emotions, not having to buy stuff with money that's so difficult to earn. You cup your hands and place them on your face, crying, knowing it won't help.at all.

.

[needlereads]

Bed of Roses

dark!Clark Kent x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+ only; DUBCON, coercion, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex, major size kink, descriptions of size difference, no plot

thanks to @/inklore for the divider

You had come to trust Clark, trust in his righteousness, and more personally, you trusted him to never hurt you.

Not only was he the hero the world needed; Clark had placed his secret in your hands. The least you could do for him was be there to support him in the little ways you could. It hadn't seemed enough at first, because compared to the fires he battled, the heights he flew, what could you dare hope to provide for Clark? But he kept coming back. In time, you overcame the shyness of beholding a hero. But the awe never wore off.

And how could you not grow to love this lonely soul that insisted you were the only balm for the sacrifices he made?

You hadn't been ready that first time, but he had been patient with you. You started out with so much going through your mind; afraid you would disappoint him, afraid that the next stage of physical intimacy would change too much of your relationship.

Then he came in, with a confident touch and encouraging words. There was so much, he was so much that night.

Hungry -- his eyes blazed up and down your naked form; his hands grasped and squeezed firmly so that were you to try and get away, you would have surely failed. His mouth had swallowed down your mumbles, nipped your skin until you felt dazed in submission.

You had been nervous, yet his cooing washed away your quiet words. His unrelenting weight kept you in place beneath him. Kept you secure, just as he insisted you should be. I'll always keep you safe. He could understand you so well, even better than your own mind, it had seemed. You don't let new things scare you off. You're my brave girl. He shouldered the responsibility of Earth's inhabitants, yet, Clark did not hesitate to pay extra attention to you.

"Just the tip, that's it." He cooed, nuzzling against you as your lips parted in mimicry of how he was opening you up. "So good, sweetheart."

He wedged the tip of his cock between the wet lips of your cunt, pressing, splitting, pushing until the bulbous head burst past that tight opening and stayed caught. You gasped, breathing shallow at the impossibly thick intrusion.

He took your hand. He kissed your fingertips, then licked your open palm and guided you, wrapping your little hand around his shaft and leading you in stroking him. He huffed, grunting how good you made him feel.

"Such a good girl for me. Fuck, this pretty pussy can't fit all of me yet, huh? Keep going."

You did your best, eager to please him, eager to be good so he could see how much you loved him being gentle for you. Even with the overwhelming heat of his skin on yours, the press and mix of sweat, you tried following his lead. The initial sting of his penetration had faded and all you wanted was to make him feel good. He had listened to you. When you were hesitant, he had encouraged you to trust in him and in yourself. He challenged you in a good way, knowing you could handle these new touches. Clark had told you he knew what was best for you, and see how he had proven it?

Your heart thundered, but you sped up, gripping him tight. You squirmed as he sucked hard at a nipple, sparking jolts of pleasure through you, making your whine at the way his teeth ran across your softness. He groaned. You felt his muscles under your free hand, contracted with so much pressure like he was holding all of himself back. He tried so hard, all for your sake. You would be good for him.

You felt sore and so tired after, and so safe in his embrace.

He kissed you as you fell asleep. Grateful that you could share this with Clark. He would never make you do anything you couldn't handle.

He held your knees wide apart and gorged himself between your legs. You grew sensitive after his eager mouth suckled and licked you so. When you tried to sit up, uttering his name, he yanked you onto your back and kept taking in your sweet slick. His tongue thrust into you, then one finger pushed in that had you whimpering.

Again, you were at his mercy -- no, you were receiving his love, his passion. He was so good to you. You could be good for him.

You hadn't expected so much of his attention tonight, and couldn't help writhing as he kept at you, kissing your sensitive core raw.

When he sat up, you groaned in relief. Clark dropped soft kisses along your hip, murmuring praise. You would have swooned if you weren't already a puddle of buzzing pleasure.

Tonight, he asked to touch you again just so. He missed you, couldn't get you out of his mind, needed to be close to you. Just the tip again, he said.

Now, you were trapped under him. The tip of his cock had found home in you once more. Just as tight of a squeeze as the first time. You wanted to make him feel good again. Just the tip. You could do it.

He was leaving wet kisses up your breastbone, when you felt another bit of his cock slide in.

You winced.

"You're okay. I got you."

A brief rut had you pressing at the side of his ribs. "...Cla..Ah..."

He licked into your mouth. His big paw captured your hand, holding it down. He flexed his hip and you whined at getting split more and more.

"Feel so fucking perfect," he groaned. He filled you so much now, you sobbed, trying to remind him of his promise, but he kissed you, his gravelly voice unrepentant in your ear.

"Knew you could take it. My good girl."

He drew out and thrust slow and slick into you, again and again. Each time he withdrew you felt your pussy clinging to him and you didn't know how but the heat in your center flared hotter and hotter. There was so much of him to fit in, and he had primed you for it, dripping as you were. But you had not been prepared for this, and there so much, so much of him to take.

Resting his forehead on yours, Clark took up all the space in and around you. He was everything, all that you could feel as his hips met the backs of your thighs.

Your body grew taut, ready to combust. Grinding against you lit up that nub of pleasure and you whined with your release. Seeing you lose yourself in climax drove Clark to a frenzy, hips snapping until you couldn't remember how it felt before he claimed you. He growled into the crook of your neck, holding you tight as he came.

As your mind slowly cleared, he shifted you, laid you out on top of him. You felt his hands all over, stroking down your back, kneading your shoulder, squeezing your bottom. His touch, heavy and warm, lulled you away from how overwhelmed you had felt.

Clark knew all along what was good for the both of you.

-

[justme315]

Tiny best friend 2/5

First part:

Next part:

!Warning!

Fear, angst, treating a person like a thing, regret, hurt/comfort, it's more fluffy that the first part though

-------------

Jake stood there paralyzed with fear, tears streaming down his cheeks. During this time, Lucas looked at him with curiosity and an increasingly wide smile. The smile grew until the teenager finally burst out laughing.

"Oh my, am I going crazy?!" he whispered as the laughter in his mouth died. He clutched his forehead and looked back at Jake. "This isn't real, people don't suddenly turn into tinies" he tried to explain more to himself than anyone else. As this was happening, Jake looked up at his frien- ex-friend, both fearful and surprised at his reaction. He wanted to run but he didn't know where. The borrower was terrified, and by the moment he heard less and less of Lucas' mumbling, until finally the extremely fast beating of his heart drowned out everything around him.

"Am I dreaming? Is this just some stupid dream?" the human exasperated. Finally, he looked down at Jake again, who was clearly having a panic attack and was paralyzed with fear. Something so terrible couldn't be a dream. A nightmare at best.

"Jake?" Lucas timidly asked "Are you.. How did you change your size?". The two boys' eyes met for a moment. It seemed like Lucas thought that Jake had shrunk rather than it's his normal size. Was it something good? Did it change anything? Probably not. It didn't change anything for Jake, who couldn't stand being so close to someone so gigantic anymore, his heart was beating too fast and too loud, his thoughts drowned out Lucas's words, and his lungs couldn't get enough air. Luke leaned forward, then knelt in front of Jake. He looked down at him, his shock and disbelief turning to a warm look. He moved rather slowly, as if he didn't want to startle a small animal, something mouse-a-like. The borrower blinked a few times before snapping back to reality. He bit his lower lip and broke into a run. Lucas reached his hand to the borrower, trying to grab him. With all his might, Jake ran so fast that he managed to run under the cupboard and backed up so far that the human could not reach him.

"Jake!" Lucas shouted, trying to reach his friend. Jake backed up as far as he could, pressing his back hard against the wall. Lucas withdrew his hand and sat up straight, leaning against the wall. His mind was filled with questions: How is this possible? What is it about? How can a human become a tiny?! But the most important was..

"Jake, are you.. scared of me..? Is that why you asked about tinies? Is that why you panicked so much? Is it usual for you to size shift?" Lucas took a deep breath. He didn't want it that way. Neither did Jake.

"Jake.. I'm so sorry.. Okay, I said what I said, but it's not about you! I would never…" he stopped. The very thought disgusted him. How could he do that to his best friend? While he was thinking about what he said just moments ago, Jake was panicking, he sat up and curled up with his knees as close to his chest as possible and cried out in fear. He didn't believe the words Lucas said as if through the beating of his heart, tears and thoughts. He was scared. He was so fucking scared. He tried to control himself, he knew this house, and tried to find the best and closest way out so that he wouldn't have to be near Lucas for any more seconds. Unfortunately, this house was not inhabited by others of his kind, as far as he knew. He'd never been able to explore this place in his normal form, so he didn't know any tunnels, escape routes, or even if they existed.

"Jake get out!" Lucas tried to force the teen out. He may have had remorse and disgust at his own words, but Jake was still just a tiny at this point. Nothing more, nothing extraordinary. The human got up and walked over to the cupboard. Suddenly, Jake felt the world move around him, so he looked up to find Lucas moving the cabinet above him.

"There you are" sighed the teenager, setting the cupboard aside. He didn't even think that it was an incredibly dangerous move, he could've hurt Jake. Jake was paralyzed with fear again, new warm tears streaming down his cheeks as he lifted his head high to look at his former friend's face.

"Don't make it hard for me, kid" Lucas said, leaning in. The borrowers' blood ran cold and he broke into a run as fast as he could. Unfortunately, the human was much faster and immediately grabbed the boy, tightly squeezing his chest and belly lifting him up. Jake tried to inhale, but it was very hard. Not only was he panicking, but he was in the giant's hand and it was squeezing him. He was lifted close to the other boy's face.

"NO, please! Let go!" he shouted on a gasping breath.

"Stop fighting. I already caught you” Lucas sighed, loosening his grip. Jake breathe heavely. It wasn't looking too good for him.

"How did you get this small?" Lucas asked curiously. Jake swallowed. Maybe he still could make a chance to make things work out somehow.

"L-lucas, I'm begging you, let me go.." the boy cried. Lucas looked at him sadly.

"I didn't mean to frighten you" he whispered, as if he was afraid that even a little louder might make Jake have a heart attack. "I don't understand what's going on, but I would never hurt you." he added.

"You wouldn't? B-but you said.. you k-killed someone like m-me!" Jake panicked again, averting his eyes as far as possible from the giant teen.

"I'm sorry Jake. I didn't.. I didn't mean something like that. You are my best friend, although now you're really small, but you are very important to me, I would never hurt you. " Lucas answered. Jake looked into Lucas's eyes again. If the boy wanted to hurt him, he could have done it already, Jake was in his hands, defenseless. He had no need to pretend.

"I trust you" said the borrower, wiping tears from his eyes.

Maybe their friendship still had a chance.

[twistedisciple]

Few could mistake the appearance of a Hound or ignore the corner he claimed. Where others carried themselves wary and on edge, a certain Fell Dragon seemed all too pleased with this new arrival. Though it would be remiss to call Griss a perfectly kindred spirit, both were given a wide berth by the tent's inhabitants, and that berth grew wider still as the dragon approached him. 

“So you have finally made your way here, Griss. You did well to last as long as you have, though I admit it is somewhat of a shame.” He looked at him steadily, a face entirely wiped of enmity, only rapt attention. Amicable? Threatening? That was for Griss to judge. “Had you spelled allegiance to a different house, I would have enjoyed the chance to defeat you myself.” 

Rafal smirked, cocky and assured. Pointedly omitting the early circumstance of his own defeat. That failed to be the crux of the next matter and, after expressing his unique greetings, a spell of quietude wormed itself between them owed predominantly to himself deep in thought. A longer moment than anticipated.

“. . .On the way here, I was approached by a foul woman.” 

An understatement, an offender of discretion lacking clear identity markers at that. Even as he did it, he did not know why he tested Griss, or realize that he watched his reaction with every syllable. The other's name had surfaced, as had his part played in the intelligence thrown around of Rafal that few others could know. But still it was not tantamount to hurt; still it was not betrayal. Even if he would not ever lay claim to the term, the Fell Dragon possessed no right to brandish it between them.

Betrayal, after all, was a crime only between friends. Not a lord and a knight from two different worlds playing at patchwork fealty.

“A Mage Dragon by all appearances, she spoke of both you and I with special awareness,” he finished evenly, pivoting on his heel. Both dragon and topic to dissolve on an air of enigma. “I only thought you should know.” 

“There you are, L—“ Griss clamped his mouth shut, teeth snapping down on his tongue (unintentional and not sharp enough to draw blood, but a pleasure-punishment for speaking out of turn anyway), although his lips still formed their smile. Like Zephia, Lord Rafal had come with his own agenda, his own questions, and his own evaluation of his performance, so the Hound swung his legs over the edge of the cot and offered his full attention like the very beast that gave him his name. For now, he detected nothing in the dragon’s face that suggested he’d come for anything but the follow-up for a job - and one that Griss had done exactly as it’d been given to him: make it to the next round. No more, no less.

As Lord Rafal spoke, Griss’ attentive eyes remained fixed on his face even as the rest of him swayed a little side to side to satisfy his need for constant motion. Some mute unconscious thing could read the lines and shadows there, but it was quiet, easily drowned by an epiphany the dragon gave him instead. He stopped abruptly, eyelids flaring.

“What?” It had never occurred to him that he could have picked a different house. “You coulda said that earlier!” He clasped the thin edge of the cot and leaned forward eagerly. With the sliver of uncertain tension broken, the two of them now smiling in their own ways, they almost looked like everyone else in the medical tent. Friends seeking out the company of friends, sharing the tales of their conquests and defeats between spells of laughter.

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna make me wait ‘til next year… What do I gotta do to feel your axe arm?”

He knew, even as he went on with his theatrics, groaning and sighing and complaining about his missed opportunity, that he’d picked the Black Eagles because of Zephia. And he’d promised he’d never leave her side, no matter what. Maybe if he was a different person, he would have thought he might have a chance to convince her to support a different one next year. But he wasn’t, and he didn’t. It was no source of regret, no source of resentment; it was simply what it was.

Even when Griss had little reason to bring her into the conversation, she appeared anyway - conjured by Lord Rafal, instead. Mention of a ‘foul woman’ had settled him back down, and he cocked his head to the side with real and obvious confusion, even though his intuition had grasped the connection between Zephia’s meeting with him earlier and this one, and stuck him like a pin. Then Lord Rafal identified her as a mage dragon and all but drove it home. Griss stiffened with the realization, just slightly, because he’d seen Lady Veyle’s face in this fair-haired child of Lord Sombron, and he didn’t like it.

“Wonder what she did to ruffle you,” Griss muttered, still staring up at him, glazed eyes unblinking, still wearing his half-formed smile. “And why’re you telling me? You want me to do something about it?”

[snail-noodle]

��Krang x Reader Headcanons💌

I have it bad for 3 aliens that look like a creeper, a minecraft block, and a squid 😔💍

sorry if this all looks messy, I just wanted to gets these hcs out of my head aaa

Wrote for all 3 krang siblings. It's a whole buffet 😋

Krang One

he's not the type of partner who would give you physical affection or tell you that he loves you at every moment. Especially when you two start dating.

the concept of "love" and "marriage" is alien (heh) to him and his people. Thankfully, you're there to help him learn about these concepts

it's quite rare, but there are moments when he'll wrap his tentacles around you and hold you close to him. He loves how small and warm you are

your first kiss was awkward and slightly.. uh... messy due to the size difference. However, kisses on the face are just as intimate for the both of you, so you two stick with that most of the time

when you introduce him to earth's many different foods, he ends up enjoying the ones that tend to be spicy

once he gets used to living on earth, he likes to spend the nights with you staring out at the stars.

he's the type of person who would be disgusted at seeing people publicly kissing or holding hands, but then he'll be the one to do the same thing with you. No shame

if you two ever encounter a turtle, you literally have to stand between them so he won't take out his anger at the poor thing. He still holds a bit of a grudge...

Krang Two

unlike her brother, she's very possessive of you and has definitely marked you with her own scent at one point. it makes it easier for her to find you

she finds it amusing whenever you get riled up at something (or at her). She might even find it quite cute.

once you've introduced her to burgers and fries, she's hooked! She absolutely loves the ones with a lot of meat, so be ready for your wallet to take a hit.

she's caught off-guard the first time you hug her. After you explain what a hug is and why you did it, she asks you if you can do it again. You two spend many nights hugging and cuddling together

omg give this tentacled-woman a bunch of kisses please– It doesn't matter if it's on the lips, cheeks, or head! She absolutely loves it when you shower her with affection 💖 everytime you do, she'll give out a little purr

she still has a bit of a temper, so expect her to be ready to demolish anyone who tries to hurt you/talks badly about you. She's ready to throw hands for you! 🤜

please take her outdoors. She needs to stretch those tentacles of hers and get some fresh air every now and then.

Krang Three

because of him being mute, he shows his love/affection towards you with his actions.

if you're having a bad day and need to vent, he'll be there for you. He'll listen to you and once you're done, he'll hold you close close to him. It's one of his ways of providing you comfort.

he'll be very interested to learn about earth and the many creatures and inhabitants of this planet. Once you've shown him the internet and explained that he could search up anything he wants to know about, well, just be ready for him to stay up all night for a few days.

he'll eventually form some sort of mind-link with you (completely safe, promise) and oh boy, the things he's wanted to say to you for a long time. The relationship between the both of you is so new and confusing... he likes it 💖

he loves it when you're the one who holds him at night. It gives him comfort and makes him know that he's no longer in the prison dimension.

after showing him anime, you both spend the weekends watching them and being nerds together.

brother krang might be the most chill boyfriend/husband you could possibly have in a relationship.

[whirling-fangs]

'He has been having trouble sleeping, you say? Poor little Inosuke. Is he restless? I believe some meditation might help him clarify his mind and find some peace. He has been through so much... as have you, Kotoha-san. Please, allow me to help. Let me take him with me for tonight so you may rest properly. There is nothing to worry about, after all. I will take good care of your son. '

To skewer a piece of chicken through a stick would have been a harder task than to convince Hashibira Kotoha that her son was safe and sound under the Lord Founder's wing. If anything, private time to meditate by the enlightened one's side was seen as an honor. Inosuke... was envied among the others. Envied, for being brought to this cavernous backroom. Envied for being made to sit on the wooden floor and inhale the lingering scent of something metallic and slightly acidic that had eaten through the varnish. The backrooms were not nearly as well-kept as the temple's front, after all. Because so few would visit back here. And even fewer would come out again to attest to the condition.

"How do you feel about your first day in training, huh? I hope you have had a hefty breakfast today, young man. I told the acolytes to offer you a double portion. " The monster giggles. His golden fans spread as if to curse the child with another reminder of that near-death experience. They know it must have come to haunt him. Yet, the everlasting smile plastered on the demon's visage only falters when his tongue sticks out in effort, swinging the weapons as if he expects to make something from the glimmering shards of ice fanned between them.

"Your very first training session should be something memorable, after all! So, I have planned something very special for you. Pft-tee-heeh! " They cant their head with that exaggerated smile, as if they are completely oblivious to the dread in those emerald eyes. And then, out of nowhere; a creature is born. A life sized animal made of pure crystal - scraping its hoof against the wood, blowing frozen air from its nostrils. A boar, made from ice. Douma takes a step back and sits in the middle of the room, crossing his legs. The creature's hollow eyes turn on Inosuke.

"Start running."

And it charges.

Inosuke could only sit in silence as he listened to the monster's inane arguments. He wasn't sure what hurt him more — the palpable pleasure that the monster took in hearing about his pleas, or the gratitude that his mother felt upon hearing that the Lord could remedy to them.

She was sending him straight into the lion's den. Sending him off with a smile, and the certainty that he would come back cured of all woes.

And so he followed the man to the backrooms, holding his chin high in front of the envious ladies that paved the way. He ignored the whispers, the comments and the hushed voices, wishing so dearly that they could understand. He was not going to be healed.

He was going to be destroyed.

He did not humor the man with an answer. Inosuke had forced the food past his own lips, battling against an appetite that had not returned since that night. Flesh may have long healed, his ravaging cold nothing but a distant dream... but the horrors that inhabited his sleep would not fade.

His fists balled by his sides as he waited for the verdict, waited to see what kind of torture he was about to be submitted to. Ice taking shape, out of thin air, a form that was all too familiar to him.

A wild boar, the likes of the ones he had obserbed from afar so many times on his little forest escapades.

Except this one wasn't idly burying its snout into the ground, looking for fresh mushrooms or acorns. Its eyes, terrifyingly void of conscience, were locked right on the boy. This large, live boar of ice was about to charge at him.

Inosuke did not need to be told twice. He bolted off, arms clawing at the air before him, as if grasping for help that would never come. His gaze darted around the room, looking for something, anything he could use to defend himself. A loose plank, a piece of decoration, even a wooden stick would do.

What could his small, weak hands do against the creature's tusks and bulk?

[judjira]

slippery business

AN: yaaaay dubchaeng finally!! i had a lot of fun with this one, i was literally playing hades and had to stop a run halfway through because i just thought of the idea lmao also a sneak peek at our last apartment inhabitant !! i say sneak peek, but really you see most of her here HAHA enjoy !!

pairing: dubchaeng apartment au wc: 1429

“Thisss isss gonna be ssso fucking funny.”

Now, Chaeyoung had a lot of good ideas.

So many, really, all great plans for a numerous amount of practical jokes at the expense of the other people in the apartment.

For example, there was that time she snuck an angel trap under the seat that Tzuyu always sat on, and she ended up stuck there for three hours with that telltale crease to her forehead when she was in trouble but didn’t want to let anyone know due to her pride.

There was also that time she put a silver piece in Momo’s wallet, and when the werewolf went to pay a delivery guy for the pizza, she immediately yelped and transformed into her wolf form right in front of the pizza guy, scurrying off to her room. Jeongyeon had to modify the dude’s memories right after.

And that one time she—

“And what in the name of the Lady are you doing now, Chaeyoung?”

The voice behind her whispered, almost, into her ear. She jumped in surprise, or at least she attempted to, in this form.

“Allfather above, Mina! Warn a girl, next time!”

“I did. I’ve been calling your name for a while now.”

While the ghost’s presence was unexpected, it wasn’t unwelcome.

“Your timing isss perfect, actually. I’m going to prank the new girl!”

She couldn’t really see where Mina’s form was, but she immediately assumed the frown on her face formed, as it did whenever she told the other woman of her plans.

“She is new here, Chaeyoung. Surely, some leniency can be provided for her?”

“This isss lenient! It’s jussst a harmlesss prank, I swear!”

She grinned, tongue slipping out of her lips(?).

“And how exactly do you explain this?”

There was a brief moment of silence, before Mina clarified.

“Your body. What did you do?”

If she had arms, she would present them in a grand manner. Unfortunately, she didn’t.

“I’m a sssnake! Isssn’t it obviousss?”

A coral snake, to be precise. The red, black, and bright yellow stripes on Chaeyoung’s current form stood out against the carpeted floor of the apartment.

“And what exactly do you plan to do as a snake?”

“Here’sss the plan. That new girl’sss like…sssome sssort of witchy girl, right? Well, I’m going to sssneak into her room and bite her! A sort of, ‘welcome to the family’ kind of thing!”

Dead air. Literally.

“And…that is a practical joke, how, exactly?”

Seriously, there was no appreciation for her jokes around here.

“It’sss going to be funny! She’s gonna ssscream and flail, and then the poissson’s gonna be in her sssyssstem, and it’sss gonna be sssuper painful!”

Mina tutted, her voice echoing through the hall.

“And if you hurt her? Lady Dahyun’s going to scold you again.”

The mention of one of their lovers had Chaeyoung scoffing lightly.

“It’ll be fine. I’ve been around witches, Mina. They can handle themselves.”

Chaeyoung had a few encounters with witches back in the day. Annoying, really, what they did, but she couldn’t deny that there was some level of amusement to their hexes. She even stole a few of them for herself.

“If you believe that is the case, then go ahead. I will have no part of this. Try not to get too injured, please.”

Chaeyoung felt a ghostly breeze whip through her, lightly shaking her form.

“Fine, you ssspoilsssport.”

Not that she ever really received any help from Mina for her pranks. At most, the ghost would tut, proclaim her disapproval, then go and get Dahyun if it ended badly. Which it had, especially when she got Jeongyeon pretty mad.

Slithering her way over to the newcomer’s door, she stifled her own giggles. This was going to be good.

Easily slipping under the gap of the door, the first thing she really smelled was earth. The next thing she saw was a fire.

Sitting by the fire was the new girl, muttering to herself and collecting some sort of dirt in her hand. Chaeyoung saw her chance, moving her body across the floor, tongue darting out as she grinned. Sure, she’d get in trouble, but it’d be hilarious.

Before she could even get a moment closer, however—

“Ow!”

A sharp pain pierced through her side, and heat pooled around where she was stabbed.

Allfather above, she just got stabbed.

A spear was sticking out of the side of her serpent form, stabbing right through her and into the hardwood floor of the apartment.

The new girl was now standing over her, fire backlighting her silhouette as all Chaeyoung saw were glowing brown eyes.

“I was not wrong, then. A Trickster hath found this abode.”

This new lady did not fuck around at all.

“Fare thee well Trickster. Mayst your soul find Tech Duinn.”

Chaeyoung immediately dropped her form, humanoid body finding purchase on the floor as the spear still pinned her to the ground.

“Wait, wait, wait! It’s just me! Chaeyoung!”

The lady froze.

And there was a knock on the door.

“Ji? Chaeng? Everything alright in there?”

Chaeyoung immediately saw her chance and took it.

“Dahyun! Save me!”

The lady immediately snapped to her.

“Silence, Trickster! Lest I inflict the same injury twofold!”

The door opened, and there Dahyun was, eyes squinted in gentle confusion as she pushed the door open.

“What exactly is going on here?”

It was a little hard to explain, but Chaeyoung was at least glad the college student had interrupted before anything serious happened.

“She’s crazy, Dahyun! She stabbed me out of nowhere!”

The lady hissed, hand flexing forward to grab the spear.

“T’was you that snuck into my chambers, snake.”

Dahyun sighed, a common sound to be heard in the apartment.

“Ji, can you please pull the spear out of Chaeyoung’s stomach?”

The witch faltered, eyes blinking up at Dahyun.

“But…my love, she is a Trickster. Left unchecked, she would see that the haven fall.”

Chaeyoung let out a squawk of indignation from where she was on the floor.

“Excuse you! I live here, too!”

Dahyun crossed her arms, clearly disgruntled already.

“Please, Ji.”

The lady begrudgingly took her spear, sliding it out of Chaeyoung’s stomach. Chaeyoung immediately scrambled to Dahyun’s side.

“Geez, that really hurt, you know!?”

Spear in hand, the lady rolled her eyes.

“Thou art a Trickster. Thine wounds heal in the mere blink of an eye.”

“Still! You hurt my feelings!”

“Chaeng.”

The subtle hardness in Dahyun’s tone had her flinching. Uh oh.

“What did we say about pranking people?”

Chaeyoung sputtered a defense.

“It was harmless!”

“Really? Becoming a venomous snake and biting her while she wasn’t looking?”

Damn it, Mina.

“Okay, well, mostly harmless!”

“Just apologize, please.”

Chaeyoung let out a groan. Seriously, no one appreciated the humor of her jokes. They were funny, okay?

“Do I really have to?”

“If you don’t, you’re not sleeping with me tonight.”

Chaeyoung’s eyes immediately widened.

“Woah, alright! No need to get too hasty!”

She turned to the witch with a grimace, the other woman crossing her arms and waiting.

“Ugh…fine. I’m sorry for turning into a snake and trying to poison you.”

She sniffed, turning her head.

“If this be Dahyun’s will, then so be it.”

Dahyun sighed again.

“Well, this is the best I’m going to get from either of you. But in the future, none of this, alright?”

She turned to Chaeyoung, the Trickster shrinking back.

“No more venomous snake pranks…”

She turned to the witch, whose eyebrows were furrowing in confusion.

“…and no more stabbing.”

A brief moment of silence.

“Fiiine.”

“Very well, my love.”

Dahyun nodded approvingly, before taking Chaeyoung’s hand.

“Come on. Let’s go to sleep before you make anyone else angry. Good night, Ji.”

“Farest of nights to you, my love.”

The door closed behind them, and Chaeyoung let out a sigh of relief as the Lady of the Sanctuary led her by the hand, very much like a parent would to a naughty child.

“You’re lucky we love you, Chaeng.”

Chaeyoung snickered to herself. She may not have been able to prank the new girl properly, but at least she was able to do the whole snake thing.

“I really am.”

Together, the two walked to Chaeyoung’s bedroom together, tucking each other under the covers and sighing into each other as they drifted off to sleep.

Later on, she would get in trouble for attempting to do the same to Sana, and her defense would be that she was only told not to transform into any venomous snakes, so normal snakes were free game.

[prettyboykatsuki]

☆ cw ;; hurt/comfort, discussions about depression and mental health and suicidal thoughts, mentions relapsing.

"Hey," His voice is calm, gentle but authoritative "Time to get up. Or I can give you five. Your choice. "

"Five minutes, please,"

You can feel his presence at the door way. You're turned to face the other way, but his shadow is on your wall clear as day. His steps are silent. The corner of your bed dips under the weight of his body, as he leans over over your form.

Instead of saying anything, he places a kiss to your temple. There's a feeling in his voice, but you don't know what. Somewhere crossed between sympathy, pain, and love. All three. You shut your eyes.

"Five minutes," He parrots hoarsely "I love you,"

"I love you too, Katsuki"

He doesn't sigh when he gets up. Probably for your sake. He simply shuts the door behind him, and leaves you in your dark room. You move to lay on your back and stare at the ceiling. The sound of your fan is just enough noise, and the room is cold. You're comfortable under your blankets, in the warmth. In your room, alone. You're comfortable like this, in your own way.

If it was up to you, you'd stay here. You want to stay here, and only here. Nowhere else.

But that's why you have to get up in 5 minutes. To shower, to brush your teeth after uncountable days, to pray or mediate - whichever feels the least heavy. You want to lay down, forever, but you can't. You have to live. It's on the other side of your door, that life.

Everything is slow as you think it. Aware of your self and your passivity, you can feel the itch on your skin after skipping showers. The grease collected around your nose. These clothes you haven't changed. Even the cup of water near your bed that's starting to taste like dust.

You were under the impression that after you stopped wanting to die, after your sadness and pain, that the journey to sea-level would be peaceful. A part of you felt betrayed. You were promised it gets better.

Instead though, you find yourself pushing up against the weight of the deep-sea. Down here, there's less oxygen and you're fighting for air for the first time. Instead of drowning, or dying. Even if you get to the top, you must do it slowly. And you're so busy trying not to sink back, to breathe, you don't have a chance to feel better.

It doesn't feel better. It doesn't feel like anything. You want to live, and you thought that would be easy. That the swim towards the promising sunlight would be pleasant.

But you're encased in cold amniotic fluid - a living thing inhabiting a dead case, and you don't want to fight for air to breathe. Each time you make it farther, you hit what feels like a hall of ice that you break through with bloodied knuckles. It's so ugly you don't tell anyone about it.

You've done this too before. A hundred times. When you're above a few hundred more feet and, getting warmer. This exhaustion is a familiar ache. This desire for extremity, this yearning for the deep dark. You want to do all the things that made you terrible, just because it's easier than having to punch through. It's always easier to go under, or over, than it is to go through.

Beyond that door is your life in all it's mundanity. It's your cat, and your boyfriend. It's your circumstances, all wrapped up. Your life. The florescent lights will make your eyes hurt. You'll cry naked in your bathroom when you shower.

The water will pour from overhead, and you will gasp for air as it touches your skin. You'll keep shattering the ice with your bare knuckles as you break through to a new normal.

A car passing by your window has lights that shine into your room. It must be the sun. The sun is above you. Life is outside. You just have to get up to go search for meaning in it.

A knock tugs you gently from your trance. The door creaks when it opens, and the warmth creeps in once again.

"Ready to get up?" His voice is calm. Easy. It's quiet.

You get up. The sheets rustle underneath you.

"Yeah," Comes your reply, exhausted but willing "I'm up."

[tiredb0igivemesugars]

Cold basement floor

Summary: Y/n is taken hostage

📝Words📝: 1.7K

⚠️Warnings⚠️: detailed mentions of stabbing and pain. Knives, smoking and burns.

💙Pairing💙: none. Tony Stark as Y/n's father

📎Note📎: I know this is a lot different from my usual stuff but I still wanted to post this one, hopefully you won't think too ill of me after this

The big metal door swung open and then closed, the loud noise startling you. You weren’t actually sure if the door was metal since you couldn’t see but it sure sounded like it. A pair of heavy boots walked on the concrete floor. That you were sure of, you had felt the cold and wet concrete floor yourself. You shook out of coldness in the room. The cold shackles on your wrists and ankles kept you from moving along with making sure you got deep cuts on your skin from the edges. You had no idea how long you had been gone. You just knew you were starving. You heard the same broken water pipe dropping droplets of water on the floor, forming a puddle. The larger the puddle got, the deeper the sound was. You had momentarily considered drinking from the puddle, but decided against it once you deducted that you couldn’t reach it.

The man with the heavy boots walked around the room, his steps echoing throughout the room. The sounds from his steps echoed in the room, bouncing off the walls. They had blindfolded you, at least that was what you thought. The chains on your arms weren’t long enough for you to touch the blindfold but you could still feel the soft material wrapped around your head, covering your eyes.

A chair was dragged across the floor, a screeching sound now echoing in the room. The man sat down on the chair. ”Y/n now was it?” He asked. You heard as he pulled something out of his pocket. A lighter. Suddenly the room smelt of cigarettes. He was smoking. His mouth made wet noises as he sucked on it. The ashes made the quietest sound when they fell on the floor beneath him. You didn’t answer his question, trying to pay attention to every sound in the room and possibly outside of it. The direction of the wind changed. You felt it as the wind grazed upon your exposed upper arms. ”Your dad is not paying the ransom money,” the man said. His voice was rough, raspy even. He had no foreign accent so he wasn’t hydra. He sounded slightly surprised, like he tried to make conversation with you about the fact.

You listened as the man shifted in his chair, clearly uncomfortable in the position he had chosen for himself. ”You probably have no idea how long you’ve been here,” the man suddenly said. That he was right about. ”Three days. Three days without food or water. That does something to a person,” he continued. He stood up and began walking around the room. His steps became further away before they came back, this time closer. So much more closer. You pressed yourself against the cold wall, desperate to get away from him. The dust and pieces of rock from the wall dug themselves into your skin, making you feel uncomfortable. ”You see. Now when your dad isn’t paying up, we get to have all the fun we want,” he said. His voice so much closer. Closer than ever. You could even feel his breath on your skin. He blew smoke into your face. You coughed at the repulsive smell. There was a sudden pain in your forearm. A burning pain. You bit your lip, trying to not give in to the temptation to scream as the pain worsened.

The man suddenly yelled something to his accomplices, startling you. The metal door banged again. At least two other people came into the room. The sounds of their steps echoed in the room, fast and determined. Pairs of hands grabbed your shackles. ”No no please stop,” you begged. You trashed against their firm hold, ”no please don’t hurt me,” you begged. The cold metal against your skin was gone, now a hand was laid against your scalp, pulling on your hair. ”Let’s go,” a deep voice said and pulled you up by holding onto your hair. You cried out in pain. He began pulling you forward, out of the room. Your feet barely touched the ground as the man pulled on your hair. The cement was freezing cold against your bare feet as you were dragged out of the room. The hallway was filled with different noises. The sounds of different machines running and people screaming in agony. You too, screamed in agony as you were pulled into another room. You felt another pair of cuffs getting tied around your wrists, then suddenly, you were hanging from the ceiling. You panted, anxious for what was to happen next.

The number of steps had been reduced to one pair. Another cigarette was lit. ”Now,” the familiar voice said. It was the same man from before. ”We’re gonna have fun,” he stated, sounding ominous.

You breathed in deeply, trying to embrace yourself for whatever it was that was about to happen. You could hear a cart being wheeled towards you. The wheels screeched and screamed in pure agony. The man hummed a song as he touched every object on the table. Something thin made of metal. A big machine with the outer layer being plastic and lots of switches. A small plastic object with some glass on it. The man suddenly grabbed an object, it slid against the table as he took it in his hand. He took steps around the room, like dancing. His humming became louder and clearer. It was no melody you recognised, although somewhat familiar. He seemed to have stopped in front of you, there couldn’t have been more than five inches between his nose and yours. His breath smelled foul, the occasional hint of nicotine mixed with whiskey and something rotten. He licked your cheek before spitting on your barefoot. He smacked his lips together. ”Sweat, tears, dirt and maybe a hint of blood,” he spoke in a calm matter. You shuddered as the chills ran down your spine.

He pressed an object against your stomach. ”Do you have any idea why you’re here?” He asked. You could now tell that the object was a knife. Its sharp point was pressed against your skin, only the thin fabric of the open-back hospital gown separating it and you. You chuckled awkwardly, trying to hide your fear. ”I- I have no clue,” you answered. You wanted to make a joke, ease the pressure in your chest but you couldn’t. The fear that came with losing one of your main senses was too powerful. It kept you in check, woke you up to the reality that you had no idea what was going on. You had no idea what was to happen next. You could hear him breathe. Feel how the small air current changed with each of his exhales and inhales.

This room. This place you were in, had been in for three days, was his kingdom. He was in absolute control. You were powerless, like an animal in a cage at his mercy.

”You’re here as a paper we’re going to write the message onto. You can tell your dad that he messed with the wrong people,” the man whispered as he pushed the knife into you. You could feel your skin split as the sharp object was pushed further into you. It burned. You were on fire as you screamed. The pain was excruciating as it spread throughout your body. Over and over again, he sunk the knife into your skin and dragged it in every possible direction to inflict the most pain possible.

Once the pain in your body and throat became too much, you fell limp. Your mind was now up for rent. Owners from before had gotten their deposit back and now new inhabitants were to move in. Yet, no one hauled their sofa and dining table in through the doorway that was just a little too small. As minutes went on, you failed to react or really even register what was happening anymore. None of it mattered, you didn’t care. This pain that was being inflicted upon you was too much, why be around to feel it?

Eventually, it came to a halt. He stopped digging the sharp blade into you. The cart made a loud noise as he threw the knife back on it. ”Like a Christmas present,” he whispered in your ear, his rough hand caressing your wounds.

Tears escaped your eyes as you hung there, chest rising and falling as you failed to fully re-enter your body. His hands stopped roaming your body as he took a step back. The screeching noise of a chair being pulled filled your barely conscious mind. He seemed to sit back down, unmoving. Eventually, he moved. He moved and began humming the same tune from before. He grabbed the knife from before and you braced yourself for more pain. But when no pain came your breathing eased just the lightest amount. Yet, still, you hung there, from the ceiling on hypervigilance. This seemed to go on for hours. The man just humming the same tune over and over again as he sat there, most likely watching you.

There was a loud crash. It startled you as it seemed to do the same to the man. He pushed himself off the chair and hurried out of the room, yelling orders. You felt relieved upon hearing the loud sirens of the security system. Finally, you were going to be released from your nightmare. You listened as guns went off and people screamed, crying tears of happiness when you heard every metal door being opened systematically. Blood pumped into your ears as you listened to the nearing sounds of the doors opening. The hinges of the door creaked and you sighed in relief. ”Hold on, I think I got something,” the familiar voice of Steve Rogers aka Captain America spoke. ”Hello?” You called out once you heard no movement. ”Y/n?” Steve’s voice asked, confused and concerned. You cried out in relief. ”Can you please help me?” You pleaded, hearing how desperate and raw your own voice sounded. You heard Steve’s steps as his feet came in contact with the cold and damp floor. His hands undid your shackles before lifting you to carry you. You sighed in relief as your head fell on his shoulder. You felt the rhythm of his steps as he walked. The sounds of the fighting had stopped, feeding into your relief that yes, your nightmare was in fact, over.

”I’ll help you. Always will,” a voice said. Your blood halted. It wasn’t Steve’s voice.

[alicee1]

Unsure

Technoblade x GN! Reader

Warnings: bit of angst, self doubt (from Techno’s side), I think thats it? Please tell me if I missed something.

Word count: 1K

Requested: no

Synopsis: after a rough day in the nether doubts crawl into Techno’s mind, as his doubts, aided by the voices, force their way into his mind, you help him shut them up. Comfort fluff with a bit of angst.

A/n: I swear I also write for other characters! So far Techno has just been the easiest to write for and the quickest. I’m working on a bunch of other ideas but i can’t decide which to do first to im working on all of them at the same time. Also college has been really busy and i really wanted to upload something now that that stress period is finished so it may be a bit short with 1K but please enjoy!

Rules, Masterlist

As you sat down beside him, leaning into his form in front of the comfortable heat of the fire as the blizzard raged on outside the walls of your cabin, you could feel his form stiffen beside you.

He held a book in his hand and you couldn't help but notice the subtle clench of his hand as the corner of the page slightly crumpled under the pressure. The action made you pull away from his form, Techno struggling to keep the growl that arose in his chest at loss of your warmth against him contained.

"Tech? Are you alright?" Techno turned to you as he closed the book in his lap, his finger in between the pages to bookmark it. You assumed it was lingering adrenaline in his veins, after having spent most of the day gathering resources in the nether it was understandable if he was still on edge from the hostile enviorment. He had returned halfway through the evening, blood staining his clothes and armour, although it wasn't his own.

His hand twitched in his lap as he wanted to reach out to you, to hold you and pull you close.  Your eyes found his, worry evident within.

"I'm alright." he spoke, although you knew there was more to it. After all the time you had spent with the male, you could read him like a book.

Your hand reached out, cupping his cheek and his jaw in the cup of your hand, he couldn't help but melt into the feeling. 

To Techno, you made up his entire universe, he would hand the entire SMP to you if you so desired, conquering the land until you'd be satisfied or he'd die trying.

 Although you had never once asked him for anything, you had always been so perfectly understanding and caring to him, he was sure he didn't deserve it. The voices plaguing his mind echoed over each other as they pointed out each flaw there was.

His hands were covered in the blood of many, humans and creatures alike, people hunted for him and were out to destroy anything he cared for. You moved in with him so he could stay by your side, so he could make sure you wouldn't get hurt because of him.

Techno refused to believe that you could love him, after all of the things he had done. At times the demons in his mind crawled from the depths he banished them to and combined with the voices in his head it would overwhelm him, unable to block them out as he usually would. 

How could someone as perfect as you love him, a monster to everyone that inhabited the lands.

Your eyes softened as you looked at him, having no trouble to see the struggle that continued in his mind. After a rough or eventful day you knew of the struggles that formed in his head on occasion, noticing the subtle distance he tried to put between the two of you.

Gently your hands grabbed the book from his lap and placed it on the small table beside the couch, knowing Techno was too distracted to read. A frown etched onto his features as his zoned out gaze was focussed on your eyes, lost within the swirls of colour as the thoughts and voices distracted his mind.

"Can I hold you, my Love?" your voice was so bittersweet to him, he could listen to it for days on end without it ever losing its soft melody to him. Oh how hopelessly he had fallen for you, responding in a nod as he seemed to return from the depths of his mind.

You shuffled onto his lap, wrapping your arms around him and burying your hand in his soft pink locks, hands gently messaging the back of his scalp. It was a feeling you knew put him at ease, as you shuffled slightly so you could pull the male's head against your chest, reassuring him that you'd never leave him.

Inhaling your scent calmed him as your presence surrounded him, allowing him to close his eyes in relaxation. His hands shook lightly as he wrapped them around your waist, hesitating for a second before allowing his hands to trace of your clothes.

A satisfied hum rumbled from his chest as he relaxed in your arms, focussing on your touch to drown the intrusive voices out. You buried your nose in his hair as you inhaled his scent, as much as this helped Techno, holding him close like this made you relax into his touch as well.

Techno could feel the soft beating of your heart from his position on your chest, it calmed him, knowing you were still by his side safe and sound. His mind started to quiet down as he squeezed you closer to him softly. 

In that moment even the blizzard that raged outside of the small cabin and made the wood creak couldn't bother the two of you.

Your voice barely came out as more than a whisper, although with the minimal distance between the two of you if was more than enough, "There is nothing that could take me away from you Techno." The reassuring words made him hum softly, gentle vibrations coming from his chest at the action.

He pulled away slightly, pulling you face level on his lap as he unwrapped one of his arms from your waist, cupping your cheek softly without any shake or hesitation,

"I'll love you to the end of time, my dearest"

[lymmsweb]

Eeyy how you doing? Can I please have how Zenitsu wpuld react to a very happy and confident reader having a breakdown and finally telling him how she really feels? Like she finally tells him that she has depression, and she says this line: "I know that I'm the worst, that's why I pretend like I'm fhe best..." it's okay if your not comfortable doing it and thank you! ❤💖

I’m doing somewhat well! Wbu ? <3

You didn't specify if you wanted a fic or hcs, i was listening to Mitski and was like ‘im in the mood to write a fic’....so here we are

Ngl it reminded me of a line of ‘Oh no!’ by Marina and The Diamonds

Zenitsu x f!reader having a mental breakdown

Prompt : “I know that I’m that I’m the worst, that’s why i pretend like I’m the best”

Female reader

Comfort/Angst/Hurt

Headcanons

Zenitsu Agatsuma

Tw: Mental Breakdown (?), Depression (?)

Words : 932

“Y/N?” Zenitsu's worried voice broke through your muffled sobs, your eyes widened as you realising your cries had been way too loud. You tried your best to calm down and keep up your cheery facade like you always did.

“Y/N?” Zenitsu repeated himself, banging lightly on the door separating you two. There was no way that you couldn't hear the concern and worry in his voice. There was no way of getting out of this one, your puffy eyes would give it away.

“Coming just give me a second!” You tried to push your voice over a whisper, wincing at yourself, you're voice cracked. By now he must have known that you were crying. Your heart sunk right then, ‘why should I burden him with my problems?’

As you slowly started to stumble towards the door, you felt like throwing up, you knew that today you would have to tell him. Opening the door, you averted your gaze to the floor, hoping that he wouldn't be able to notice your face.

“Hey.” You didn't dare to speak any louder, you knew that your own voice would betray you.

silence

You were met with silence, all you could hear was your heavy breathing, but you knew that he was there. He was there in front of you. He heard you.

“Y/N, ” Zenitsu said softly, reaching out to your hand “take it from me, I know when people are crying.” Letting him take into his own, feeling like if you tried to push him away you would burst into tears again. “Can...i come in.” It wasn't a question, he was coming in, it was simply a statement. You stood there frozen as he started to walk into your room, dragging you in behind him.

“Babe-” The warmth of his hand disappeared, it seemed like he held it for ages. You finally raised your head, instantly you two locked eyes. Shame washed over you, ‘why should he have to deal with me at my worst?’ He flashed comforting smile your way, a sense of security washed over you, he patted the space next to him on your bed. He was silently inviting you to sit with him, and tell him everything.

“Zenitsu-”

“Y/N, come and talk, please.”

‘I’ve have managed to keep up this confident, cheery, loveable image, so why was it now that you were gonna open up?’

“Even if it's just something very minor, you can tell me anything.”

As you stood there, tears started to paint your cheeks, trying to regain your composure. It was this boy who managed to tear down your walls, the mask that you put on - he was able to see right through it.

You always tried to be this cheery, confident person that anyone could rely on. Even though you were surrounded by Tanjiro and the gang, family, everyone, you could not help but feel lonely. This wasn't you, you weren't like this, everyone loved this other person that's personality inhabited your body. Never-ever have you opened up to someone about this, but he would still love you. Right?

He noticed your crying form, it broke his heart that he hadn't noticed the stress that something was putting on you. Zenitsu bolted from the bed and embraced you. Resting his chin on your body, rubbing small circles on your trembling body as he let you cry on him.

“Th-This isn't me!” you managed to choke out “This isn't my personality, I don't act like this alone.” Zenitsu stayed in that position, not saying a word. “I’ve been trying to be an unrealistic version of myself, I can't be myself. I've noticed how everyone else is so happy, at times I feel genuine happiness when I'm with the ones I love, but as soon as I'm alone I realise that that's not me! Me being a cheery, loveable girl that's friendly to everyone, is. not. me.” by the time that you finished, you were out of breath, noticing how pathetic you sounded. “You must think that I'm a lost cause-“

“I don’t.” He said firmly as he let you go, trying to get a clear look at your face. Even with your tear stained, contorted face, he still found you gorgeous. “I can’t relate to what you’re going through, but remember that I love you.” Zenitsu on the inside was panicking, he felt like crying but that wouldn't help you at all. He knew that whatever he was about to say was going to leave a lasting effect on you, so he chose his words carefully.

You swore that you fell in love with him even more right then and there, heat rose to your cheeks but it wasn't like that alone was going to change your thoughts.

“I know that I'm the worst, that's why I pretend like I'm the best.”

Zenitsu’s eyes widened, in his eyes - wether it was a mask or not - he thought that you were perfect, he knew that this wasn't something that would change overnight. Right then and there he made it one of his primary goals to help you and make you feel loved. He swiftly grabbed your hand, his calloused palms hit yours, squeezing it gently. You were still trembling, trying your hardest to take deep breaths.

“Y/N, just so you know that I will help you through this! I don’t want you to go through this alone! I know that this won’t be something that we can quickly change but I know if we start now, one day you'll be comfortable with yourself!”

A/N : I don't have depression, and I've had a mental breakdown before but I dealt with it alone so I didn't really know how to incorporate another person. I am so sorry if I've misrepresented something in here!

[germvity]

RISES THE MOON

leon s kennedy x reader // 2 // the home away from home

leon regenerated before you, and he started looking for you in the tree line. eventually catching sight of you, the two of you made eye contact, but you didn't come to the campsite. instead, you ran off in another direction, and leon had to follow you into the fog.

genre: angst, attempted fluff

tags: leon tries to help you, touch starved reader, cuddling, nightmares, jill may be ooc- idk how to write her in this situation tbh 😭

warnings: nightmares, ptsd themes, mentions of bullying, violence and death

---

leon peeked into the small shack you inhabited in the woods. you had decorated it how you like and was quite cozy. you seemed busy, digging through your belongings that you kept in a chest. gently, the blonde knocks on your doorframe and you jump with a gasp, spinning around to see your fellow survivor. "sorry, i didn't mean to scare you." leon smiles sheepishly. "did anyone see you?!" you ask desperately, worry filling your eyes. "no, they were busy at the campsite." the cop furrows his brows, shuffling from foot to foot. "can i come in?" leon asks, keeping his voice soft. "i guess.." you mumble, remembering how desperate he was to help you. "nice place." his comment makes you a little flustered, and you look away bashfully. "thanks." you reply, sitting back down and continuing to sort supplies into med-kits and toolboxes.

leon sits behind you and crosses his legs, watching you carefully, something that made you grow nervous. "you have so much stuff." the blonde chuckles, hoping to ease your anxiety. "yeah... i used to hoard stuff for the other survivors before everything went bad." you shrug, "i see. perhaps we could help each other then." leon smiles, grabbing one of your med-kits to help. you let out a soft oh, glancing at the blonde on your right to carefully watch him. "hm?" he looks back at you and you fluster more, looking away. leon laughs a little, continuing to organise the kit how you were doing it. "you don't have to be so shy. i don't understand what's going on here yet, but i can keep you safe." leon says softly, glancing over at you again as he zips up the med kit. your lack of response makes the man nervous, and he gently rests his hand on your arm, hating how you flinch.

"i'll keep you safe, no matter what happens here. i'll help you and anyone else if they need it." leon's smile stumps you and you feel like crying. "you shouldn't even be here... if they find us then god knows what they'll do.." you whisper, putting your supplies away. "if who finds you?" leon asks, rubbing your arm softly. "them! all of them... anyone out there." you shudder, pulling your arm away as you move away slightly. "hey.. no one will hurt you, okay? i'll keep you safe. it's my duty, you have my word." he smiles sadly, pulling you against his chest to hug you. your breath catches in your throat, and you tense up. "it's okay. i'm gonna keep you safe." leon assures you, coddling your much smaller, malnourished form against his chest. you whimper softly, tears welling up in your eyes as you try to wiggle away from his burning touch. "it's okay.." leon soothes you, his fingers wiping away any tears.

eventually, you relax, clinging to his police vest with a few soft sobs. "is it really this bad?" leon whispers, his heart hurting for you. "yes..!" you cry, letting him hold you tightly. "hey, i have an idea." leon admits, and you hum softly, wet face staring up at him. "i can be your bodyguard so to speak, and my friend jill can keep you safe if i'm ever away." he smiles, seemingly happy with his suggestion. "i don't want anyone else getting hurt though.." letting out a small breath, you let his calloused, warm hand rest on your cheek, wiping away any tears. "we'll keep you safe and we have professional training in self defence. you shouldn't worry your pretty head." leon smiles at you, and you can't help but circle your arms around his waist to hold him closer. "thank you..." you whisper over and over again, a mantra that makes leon feel saddened for you.

"get some rest, you look like you need it." leon hushes your grateful rambling, and you fall silent as you huddle impossibly closer yet your eyes glance up at him for confirmation. "go on, i'll be here when you wake up. i'll keep you safe." the blonde assures you, and moves with you so he could bundle you up in your actually comfy cot. when the cop goes to sit down somewhere else, you sit up suddenly and catch his wrist. "don't go..." you beg, trying to pull him back to you. "please... please don't go..!" leon acts quickly as your breathing picks up. "okay, okay. i'll sit with you instead of on the floor." the officer smiles, heading back towards your bed.

when leon sits down, you can't help but try to press yourself under his arm so he would cuddle you. laughing at your attempt to slip under his arm like a needy kitten, leon wraps his arm around you securely. "you don't need my permission for this, y'know?" leon smiles, finding cute how you warmed up to his affection, however he couldn't help but also worry at your naivety to any positive touches. the officer felt like he had to protect you from any harms way, that he should hide you from the horrors of this world. but alas, all of it was out of his control and that was infuriating. "get some sleep." you hear leon whisper as he pulls your half asleep form up onto his lap and cuddles you against his chest. only humming in response, you eventually drift off and leon lets out a small sigh. "i'll keep you safe. i have to... it's my job!" leon speaks, despite knowing you can't technically hear him. "i have to make sure nothing happens to you whether it kills me or not. you're too precious." the blonde continues to monologue, before his own tiredness from a days worth of trials starts to get to him and he drifts off as well.

leon's brows furrow at the small noises that wake him up. he raises his head, neck aching from slouching over in and resting his head on you subconsciously. "y/n..?" he mumbles, becoming more awake when he realises your discomfort. you shuffle in his lap, distressed noises still falling from your lips. "hey, hey hey! it's okay, it's alright." leon shakes your shoulder softly, trying to be gentle with you. "y/n!" he calls a bit louder, finally jerking you awake with a startled inhale. you yelp and fall away from him, scrambling back with a wild look in your upset eyes. "don't hurt me! please don't hurt me!" you beg, keeping your hazy, tear-filled, sleepy eyes locked onto the figure in front of you. "hey, it's just me! it's leon, remember?" leon responds with a soft voice, slowly approaching you as if you were a wild animal. "leon..?" you whimper, blinking a few times and realising that it was in fact the blonde who looked deathly worried.

the man stretches out his arms for you, and you quickly rush for his comfort. you almost knock the poor cop over as you wrap your arms around his torso tightly. "it's okay, i've got you." leon lets out a small breath, rubbing your back as you cry against his uniform. "make it go away..! just make it all stop!" you cry loudly, hands gripping the back of the bullet proof vest leon adorned. "you're safe with me, i promise." leon offers instead, and you continue to shake with each desperate sob. "you poor thing... i'm not going to let anything get you anymore." leon sounds more sure of himself as you slowly calm in his warm embrace.

"please don't leave me alone." you whimper, feeling tired from crying. "i'm not going anywhere, okay? i'll stay with you for as long as i can." the blonde smiled, his fingers coming up to gently brush over your damp cheek. "i'm making it my duty to protect you whilst we try to figure a way out, okay? i'll keep you safe." you let out a sigh at his words. "thank you..." you whisper and the blonde laughs. "you shouldn't be thanking me." leon smiles, raising your head by your chin with his forefinger and thumb so he could look at you properly. you can't help but glance at his lips as he smiles at you, the air becoming more thick woth tension.

"there you are! jesus what the hell's happening in here?" a new, female voice that you didn't recognise chimed in, and the two of you jumped away from each other. "jill! thank god, are you alright?" leon smiles at the woman, and you follow him when he gets up to greet her. "i'm fine. who's this?" jill smiles at you softly. the aura around her was strong yet oddly comforting to you. "this is y/n. i'm going to be protecting them." leon declares to his friend. jill rolls her eyes. "he has quite the hero complex, doesn't he?" she jokes, whispering loudly as if leon couldn't hear her. you don't really respond, shuffling behind your new friend. "jill..." leon sighs, "don't worry, she's also here to help." you look at leon with uncertainty, and he smiles at you.

"sorry, didn't mean to be overbearing. i don't really know what else to do right now as it seems you're quite stressed. i'm jill valentine." the pretty woman extends her hand for you to shake, but you fully hide behind leon at her gesture. "be careful, they show signs of ptsd." leon scolds, and you feel a sense of comfort wash over your heavy mind. "oh! sorry... i'm still yet to find out what's going on here." jill laughs sheepishly, retracting her hand. "y/n, it's okay. jill's trustworthy." leon soothes you by taking his hand in yours, slowly coaxing you out to greet the woman.

"hello." jill smiles, now keeping her actions and tone soft to ensure she won't scare you. "hi..." you mumble, grabbing leon's wrist with your other hand for any sense of security. leon smiles, and looks back at jill. "jeez, they've really warmed up to you, huh?" jill jokes, and you're quick to jump to leon's defence. "he helps me!" you snap, but shrink back once you realise your outburst. leon rubs the back of your hand with his thumb comfortingly, and you relax slightly, but not fully. "it's alright. i didn't mean anything by it." jill raises her hands in faux surrender. "sorry..." leon says for you, as you seemed to have regressed to silence. "it's completely fine. nothing i haven't seen or dealt with before. i've got thick skin." jill smiles at you, and you feel your lungs deflate with relief that she isn't mad at you.

"come sit down, jill. we'll explain." leon gestures to the cot as you rest your head on his bicep. "sure." jill shrugs, following the two of you in, and settling down on the other end of the makeshift bed. when leon sits with his back against the wall, you curl up into his side, still uncertain of jill's company as the blonde speaks to her about what he's gathered so far.

[mcheang]

Lila gets exposed because she doesn't know what the Kwamis.

Kwami?

Once Pollen knew Chloé could not longer be Queen Bee, she asked that she give her a kwagatama, to remind Chloe that she can still be a hero even without powers.

Chloé treasures this charm very much and even hires Marinette to make it into a haircomb.

Seeing Chloé cherish this momento, Lila decides to brag that Ladybug has given her tons of such charms. It helps that she knows Ladybug personally.

Chloé retorts that Ladybug didn’t give her this, Pollen did.

Lila: you made this charm out of bee pollen...? I know you like bees now, but isn’t that a bit much?

Chloé: oh my kwami, don’t you know who Pollen is?

Did Ladybugs eat pollen? Lila didn’t know. So she changed topics, “kwami? I’ve never heard of that word before. Is it a French term?”

Alya and Nino exchanged looks. They knew what kwamis were. But if Lila didn’t...and to claim she received kwagatamas when you needed to actually wield a miraculous for the kwamis to collect your hair....

Alya: Lila, you’re not actually best friends with Ladybug, are you?

Lila: what? Of course I am.

Alya: sorry to say this, but while Ladybug is a genius with lucky charms, she isn’t much of a designer, at least not up to Marinette’s level.

Marinette did not know how to feel about that statement.

Alya: take it from a girl who was given cardboard boxes as a costume, Ladybug cannot design.

Lila: she can’t design costumes, but she can make good jewellery.

Chloé: I repeat myself to your dense head, Ladybug did not give me this. And there’s no way you’re Ladybug’s best friend if you don’t know what a kwami is. All heroes do.

Alya: it’s true. I’ve heard them.

Lila: well, she only says kwami when she’s in hero mode. So no one can identify her. That’s why I’ve never heard about kwamis. I’ve only hung out with Ladybug in her civilian form.

Chloé: please, if you really knew Ladybug, you would know about kwamis, whether she was in costume or otherwise.

The class was swinging back and forth.

Alya: I’m afraid I’m with Chloé on this one.

Nino: me too.

Monkey see, monkey do.

Kim: I’m with Chloé.

Lila: how could you believe her instead of me?

Nino: Chloé may be a bully but she doesn’t lie. She likes to hurt us with blunt speech.

Alya: besides, while both of you like to brag, Chloé has actual proof. But you...come to think of it, do you have any proof you are friends with celebrities?

Lila: I told you I was in Achu!

Rose: there were no pictures of him with you though.

Lila: I have them!

Class: show them to us then.

Lila: I don’t have it with me now. I’ll bring them to you tomorrow.

Marinette: you mean photoshop them and print it out?

Alya: good point. If you’re really friends with any celebrity, videocall them.

Lila: but the time difference!

Marinette: Jagged is in Paris now.

Lila: I don’t have his number. I was only given a song as thanks.

Chloé: ah yes, the song no one has heard of but you.

Lila: well it would look bad if he wrote songs for a minor.

Sabrina: then why tell us he did that for you?

Lila: I...I...

Adrien muttered, “Caught in your own web of lies.”

Lila heard that and ran crying from the room.

Marinette sighed. “Great. Now I have to comfort her before an akuma comes. Alya, come with me?”

Alya: sure.

But while Marinette went ahead, Alya decided to livestream from the shadows.

Marinette found Lila soon enough.

Marinette: Lila?

Lila: go away! I bet you’re happy they found out about me, didn’t they.

Marinette: you did this to yourself.

Lila: oh shut up! How was I supposed to know about kwames?

Marinette: kwami

Lila: whatever! After all the holes in my lies, that’s what unravelled my stories? A thing no one has ever seen? Well, no one except that pesky bug and her menagerie.

Marinette: Lila, come back to class. If you apologize and stop lying, the class will forgive you. Ok, Chloé will definitely bring it up to make things hard for you, but she does that to everyone.

Lila: forget it, i am out of this hole.

Marinette: how? No one will believe you are on charity trips anymore.

Lila: you’re such an idiot. How do you think I got my mother to let me stay at home. I’ve fooled her into thinking Dupont was under an akuma plague. A few tears this time around, and she’ll send me to some boarding school outside Paris.

Marinette: and the whole cycle will start again. You lie and get exposed.

Lila: oh please. They deserve to be manipulated if they are that gullible.

Marinette: aren’t you afraid that celebrities will sue you?

Lila: please, celebrities are used to gossip. Even that dummy Ladybug didn’t bother to clear things up with Alya.

Marinette paused guiltily. That was true.

Lila: now shut up and leave me alone!

Marinette: i can’t risk you luring an akuma.

Lila: so what if it did? Who cares? I am not going to suppress my emotions!

While Alya was broadcasting this, upset herself for not checking her facts with Ladybug (what a fool she must seem to her hero), a Ladybug fanatic was very upset and it was she Hawkmoth akumatized into Pest Control.

She was going to kill Lila, and spray the heroes with some sleepy gas.

Ladybug and Chat defeated her but also wanted to confront Lila, but she had already run away.

Alya apologizes for assuming Lila was Ladybug’s best friend. Ladybug also apologizes for not correcting her. Chat suggests it would have been better for Lila to expose herself than have Ladybug do it.

Alya: within a time limit, yeah. But the truth should be set free asap.

Lila is now an outcast in Paris. And yes, news has reached the embassy until it reached Mrs Rossi herself.

Lila is sent to a correctional facility in Paris, specially adjusted with akuma-walls so the butterflies can’t corrupt their troubled inhabitants.

Lila is now infamous and trapped.

Marinette throws Chloé another party over this.

[apocalypseornaw]

Keep Me From You

For the square "Temporary amnesia" on @girl-next-door-writes make me feel bingo

Warnings: mention of injury,cursing

Word Count: 10,201

Smidge of angst but lots of fluff

“Dean I’m fine. A few scratches but I’ll be home soon and you’re more than welcome to play nurse” You’d left a few days before to help Claire out on a hunt and had called him to say you were only about an hour out from Lebanon. “So you want me to wear the uniform and all?” he teased and heard you laugh. That was a sound that he’d always loved. “Of course I want the uniform, why would you even ask?” A smile slipped onto his face as hearing just how truly happy you sounded to be coming home to him. He’d never imagined getting this. Someone who really did love him and not only understood the life but lived it as well. “I’ll see you soon sweetheart” “Better be waiting for me at the door….” Your sentence was cut short by the sound of tires squealing then a hard hit. 

Dean knew a wreck when he heard one and his heart fell to his feet “Y/N!” when you didn’t reply he screamed your name again which brought Sam running into the room. “What’s wrong?” Dean was already on his feet grabbing the keys to the impala “Y/N’s been in a wreck. We gotta get to her”

By the time Dean and Sam rolled on scene a passerby had called 911. Multiple cop cars, a couple ambulances and even a fire truck had the night lit brightly. Dean barely stopped the car from rolling before he was jumping out. Your car was on it’s side, the driver door crumpled in. “Y/N!” before he could get close Sam grabbed him along with three of the firemen on scene “Sir! We already got her out! She’s in the ambulance!”

Dean looked to see the ambulance in question pulling away “Is she alive?” The firemen nodded solemnly “She’s in critical condition but she’s alive”  Sam pulled him back towards the impala “C’mon we’ll beat them to the hospital. We know her Dean she’s strong” Sam nodded to the firemen that he had Dean so they headed to finish cleaning up the scene. Dean looked at your car once more before following Sam “If the other driver isn’t in bad shape..I’ll kill em”

------

Sam took the lead to speak with the doctors because by the time they got to the hospital he didn’t really trust Dean to not throw a punch. “Mr Evanson..your sister in law is in critical condition as you were told at the scene. She was hit by a drunk driver that ran a red light. She’s got multiple contusions, a fractured skull and a dislocated shoulder” the fake names had you as Dean’s wife should something like this happen and Eileen as Sam’s. Helped to have insurance and provided a cover story so all of you could get updates on each other should injuries ever occur severe enough to warrant a hospital trip.

Before Sam could open his mouth to ask any questions further about your condition Dean spoke up “Let me guess the bastard that hit her is just fine right?” Sam couldn’t really blame Dean. You were one of his best friends and knowing you made it out of a hunt just fine to turn around and get hurt this severely by an idiot who drank too much and chose to get behind the wheel was more than upsetting. “Mr Evanson I know you’re upset but I assure you we’re doing everything for your wife we can” Sam could tell Dean was doing what he did best which was to lean into anger more than any other emotion so before he could fire off threats to a doctor or worse Sam grabbed his arm then looked back at the doctor “When can we see her?” “As soon as she’s settled into the room I’ll send a nurse out to get both of you”

The moment the doctor stepped away Dean spun around and hit the wall hard enough his fist left a hole in the plaster. “She was talking to me Sam. What if I distracted her? What if she would’ve seen him sooner if she hadn’t been on the phone?” “Dean, don't do that to yourself. This isn’t your fault” It shocked Sam more than anything to see Dean wasn’t trying to hide the tears in his eyes when he faced him “I can’t lose her Sammy” “You won’t. I’m gonna call Eileen and Jody to let them know. She’ll be ok. Let the doctors do what they can then if need be we’ll find other means to help her. She’s strong, she’s a fighter and honestly I think it would take a lot more than a wreck to keep her from your side” “Let’s hope you’re right”

------

A little over an hour passed with Sam and Dean pacing across the waiting room. The other inhabitants of it and staff alike were giving both men a wide berth, Dean even moreso. The air around him was thick with the mixture of anger at you being in this shape and fear at the possibility of losing you.

When a nurse finally walked in and asked “Mr Evanson and brother?” Dean snatched his head up “Over here” she smiled warmly at him “Your wife is out of surgery and stable. Would you and your brother like to see her?” “Please” Dean managed trying to remember it wasn’t this woman’s fault you were hurt.

------

The walk to your room felt longer than anything Dean had even endured. When he walked in to see your still form he could feel his hands ball into fists. You were the single most important person on the face of the earth to him besides Sam. Your head was bandaged, your left shoulder was in a sling and both arms had gauze nearly covering every surface. “When’s she gonna wake up?” Sam asked knowing Dean needed an answer but also knowing his brother wouldn’t be very good at communicating at the moment. 

“That’s a tricky question. It’s really up to her. She’s in stable condition, there’s no bleeding on her brain. Now it’s just up to her body” “Thank you. Can we stay with her a while?” “You both can stay an hour but only one can stay overnight” “Thank you” the nurse walked away and Sam turned back to see Dean was motionless at the foot of your bed.

“Dean?” Sam called jarring him out of his thoughts. “She’s a hunter. I’ve seen her hurt and I’ve known that there was always a possibility of something happening to one of us but she was fine, she was headed home and laughing” Dean had walked up next to your bed and left his fingers barely brush against the leather bracelet tied around your wrist. It was a gris-gris gifted to you by a witch in New Orleans three years before, just a couple months before you and Dean had gotten together actually. 

You’d helped her out and it was supposed to protect you from evil. You hadn’t taken it off since citing that it was a lucky charm too considering you hadn’t gotten seriously injured on a hunt in quite a while. Turned out it only worked on supernatural beings not human actions.  “She’s gonna be ok Dean” Sam repeated as Dean gently took your hand in both of his and sat down in the chair next to the bed before looking up at his little brother “How can you be so sure?” “I’ve seen her fight and I’ve seen how much she loves you. She’s not leaving us like this”

------

The two of them stayed like that for the next hour barely talking, simply watching you breathe. When the hour passed Sam headed back to the bunker while Dean stayed rooted in the chair holding your hand. “Remember when we first met? God I thought you hated me because of my dad..he had a habit of turning people into enemies. I’ve never seen Bobby laugh as hard as talking about the time you backed dad down on a hunt by calling him a washed out jarhead that didn’t know a vampire from a rugaru. Baby you’ve survived so much..you’re stronger than anyone I know” he didn’t even realize he was crying before the droplet hit your hand.

“Please come back to me. I don’t want to do this without you. I love you” he nearly whispered the last part willing you to hear him and open your eyes. 

------

For three days Dean sat at your side. Sam would bring food and clothes. Eileen had of course headed back to Lebanon when she heard what happened and Jody along with all the girls had been in near constant contact. You had so many people behind you but the horrifying reality was it didn’t matter how much backup you had this time. This fight was a solo one.

The nurses and doctors assured him that you were healing. Your body was simply mending itself and keeping you asleep to save energy to do so. He didn’t care about anything they said he needed you awake to see for himself that you were ok.

It was during visitor hours so Eileen was sitting across the room flipping through a magazine while Sam had gone after coffee. The hardest thing for any of them was simply being forced to sit around and wait to see if you’d wake up on your own. Of course Rowena was digging around to see about some spells to help speed up healing but those were a bit fragile and out of her usual wheelhouse which was to cause damage to someone instead of healing them.

“Dean they were out of sugar so I had to put artificial sweetener in yours” Sam spoke from the doorway as he walked into the room. Dean shrugged “I don’t care” Sam shared a look with Eileen when he handed her coffee over. She signed “I’m worried about him” so Sam nodded and mouthed “Me too” before walking over to hold Dean’s coffee out to him. 

Dean took it then looked back at the bed “Why isn’t she awake yet Sammy?” “Head injuries take a little more to heal Dean” Sam offered but knew it was of little solace. All of them wanted nothing more than for you to wake up. Sam walked back over to stand next to Eileen but a movement of your hand had all of them on their feet and next to the bed “Y/N?” Dean spoke first and when you opened your eyes they all shared a sigh of relief “Thank god baby” Dean breathed moving to press a kiss to your lips but you snatched your head away “Dean, what the hell?” 

------

Your head felt like it’d been run over by a truck. You felt like you were drunk and there wasn’t a body part that didn’t hurt.  When you finally forced your eyes open you realized you were in a hospital room. Sam, Dean and Eileen was next to your bed meaning you must have gotten hurt on a hunt but you couldn’t remember how.

“Thank god baby” baby? Did Dean just call you baby? Before you could ask he leaned forward as if to kiss you so you snatched your head away not missing the look on his face as you said “Dean, what the hell?” 

“Y/N? What's the last thing you remember?” Eileen asked stepping closer to the bed while Dean backed away obviously hurt but you weren’t sure why he’d called you baby or tried to kiss you. You were friends yeah but he’d never acted like he had those feelings for you. You realized your head hurt even worse when you tried to think of why he would be hurt but a memory finally came to you of you and Eileen working a shifter case in Austin. “The shifter?” you asked hesitantly and saw her eyes widened.

“Eileen? What’s wrong?” you asked grimacing when you tried to sit up further only to realize your left arm was in a sling. Sam moved to help you and you noticed Dean looking rather lost standing off to the side of the room. She looked over at him sympathetically before finally saying “Y/N that case was over three years ago”

------

 Three years? You’d lost three years worth of memories. Dean had slipped out the room after alerting the Doctor Rhodes you were awake and once Eileen assured Sam she’d stay at your side he went after his brother. You were only half listening to the doctors as they gave a run down of the wreck you’d been in and the injuries you’d received. “Well if you’re saying my brain is fine why the hell do I have a three year gap in my memory?” you knew you were being a bit blunt but given the circumstances you felt it was warranted.

“Mrs Evanson this is common in an injury like yours” the nurse nearest you spoke so you cut your eyes at Eileen silently questioning the name they’d called you. She smiled and touched Doctor Rhodes on the shoulder. When he turned to look at her she motioned to you “Can I have a few moments alone with her before you take her for tests?” he looked back at you then nodded. After he and the nurses finally exited your room giving a warning that transport would be there in twenty to take you down for a cat scan Eileen came over and sat gently on the side of your bed facing you “Ask” You looked around the room eyes settling on Dean’s jacket that he’d left draped over the back of one of the chairs “What have I missed?” she followed your line of sight over her shoulder then smiled sadly before looking back at you “The shifter case was only a month before you and Dean got together” “We’ve been together three years?” you asked making sure you were facing her fully as you spoke. “Yeah. For the insurance he’s listed as your husband and Sam’s listed as mine since me and him have been together two and a half years” 

You felt tears sting your eyes as the realization of why Dean had looked so hurt when you pulled away from him hit you at once “Why don’t I remember? God he must hate me” She covered your right hand with hers lacing your fingers together and the familiarity of that small action bought a smile to your face as she leaned down to look you in the eye before saying “Believe me when I say there is nothing on earth you could do to make that man hate you sweetie. Now I’ll be here when they get you back from the tests but I’m gonna go find him and Sam in the meantime ok?” you nodded not trusting your voice at the moment so she kissed your forehead then nodded to the nurse that had just just stepped into the door before walking out.

------

Eileen found Sam and Dean outside in the parking lot. They were leaned against the side of the impala staring at the entrance of the hospital. When they saw her they both pushed off the car Sam getting to her side first while Dean was a little slower to approach “How is she?” Sam asked and Eileen shrugged “She found out she’s missing three years. How would you be?” Then her eyes drifted over to Dean “She’s afraid you’re gonna hate her because she doesn’t remember being with you” “I could never hate her especially for something that’s not her fault” he quickly replied and she nodded “That’s what I told her but I think you need to be in the room too when she gets back from having her scans done” 

------

You were in short terrified. The scans showed that your skull was healing quite well actually and as far as structural wise your brain was in good shape and according to Doctor Rhodes your memory loss was more than likely temporary. The bad news? In cases like yours those memories could return in a matter of weeks or a matter of years. There was no way to estimate the amount of time it would take from one person to the next.

“When can I go home?” you asked adding in your head the fact that you weren’t exactly sure where home was these days. “In a couple days at this rate and I’d say within two to four weeks you can return to normal life” There was a knock on the door and one of the nurses peeked her head in “Her husband, brother in law and sister in law want to come in” Doctor Rhodes looked back at you so you nodded with a small smile “Do you remind going back over what you’ve told me?”

“Of course” he nodded to the nurse so she stepped back out and a moment later Eileen walked in trailed by Sam then finally Dean “Mr Evanson your wife asked me to go over the findings from her test with the three of you” you barely met Dean’s eyes while he listened to Doctor Rhodes despite the fact that his gaze never left your face. When the doctor mentioned you’d be going home in a couple days if you stayed healing at this rate Dean shared a look with Eileen that you didn’t miss before the three of them thanked the doctor then he excused himself.

“So turns out I was right Dean, you do have the harder head” you tried to tease but heard your voice fall flat at the end. You wanted nothing more to remember the last three years of your life. The three people standing in front of you meant the most to you yet you could only remember so much and apparently now shared your life with one of them but couldn’t so much as remember ever sharing a kiss with him. 

“Y/N..Eileen told me what you said” Dean spoke, stepping closer to the bed. He tapped the bed close to your leg but didn’t touch you “Sweetheart there’s nothing that could make me hate you. I was on the phone with you when the wreck happened. I’ve never been more afraid in my life and just seeing you awake? That’s a win for me” “I want to remember if that helps any Dean.I wish I did because it seems we’re happy” “I’d like to think we are” he replied with a small smile. You moved your leg closer to his hand so he took the hint to gently touch you near your ankle.

“While we’re all here talking..can someone tell me where is home for me?” you asked embarrassed over not being able to remember such a small detail “Um you live at the bunker” Sam answered cutting his eyes at Dean who nodded “You’ve been living there for about two years full time” “Oh then I guess we’re really serious then huh?” your voice was low enough you weren’t exactly sure Dean had heard you until he said “Yeah” meeting your eyes for a second before clearing his throat “Um visitation is over in an hour. I was gonna stay but if that’s weird for you I’m sure Eileen or Sam would” 

“Of course” they both spoke over each other then shared a small smile. Your heart ached seeing the look on Dean’s face at the two of them so in sync while you didn’t remember him. “Maybe Eileen could stay? She can help fill in some blanks since I remember hunting with her last?” you offered and Dean nodded “Of course sweet..Y/N” you noticed how he stopped himself from calling you sweetheart. Christ you’d been friends with Dean for so long. He was the best man you’d ever known but you also knew he had the self worth of a grape and you could only imagine what this was doing to him. “Thank you Dean” you whispered and he smiled slightly “Of course”

------

Dean didn’t really talk much before him and Sam left for the night but he did ask if you wanted him to bring you a change of clothes since the nurse said you could shower with assistance the next morning. “Please” you told him and with a sharp nod he was out of the room. Sam left a quick kiss on Eileen’s lips then one on your forehead before quickly following after him.

You watched the door where they’d disappeared for several seconds before Eileen touched your arm gently and you jumped which pulled a small smile to her face “Are you ok?” she asked so you nodded then turned your head to look at her fully “I was in love with him wasn’t I?” she slowly nodded. You let out a breath then leaned your head back against the pillows before asking “How did that shifter case turn out anyways?” she laughed then went into the story talking and signing what had happened trying to catch you up to speed without overwhelming you.

------

Sam found Dean sitting in the library at one of the long tables around three in the morning. There was a bottle of bourbon in front of him and a glass with a piece of ice watering down what of the brown liquid was in it. “Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, pulling the chair out across from Dean after grabbing himself a glass. Dean cut his eyes up at him “Would you be able to if it was Eileen?” “No” Sam wasn’t even going to attempt to lie, Dean knew him too well. “I don’t want to put any stress on her because she doesn’t remember” 

“You’re not. She knows now that you’re not mad that she doesn’t remember. Give Eileen a little time to ease her into the last few years besides Doctor Rhodes said her memory could be fully back within a couple weeks” “Or a couple years” Dean interrupted which earned him a glare from Sam “If you’ve ever had faith in anything..have faith in Y/N” “What if this is nature’s way of a course correction? She deserves better than me and maybe this is the universe trying to say that” 

Sam reached over and pulled the glass out of Dean’s grip then moved the bottle for good measure before saying “The only thing this says is that assholes shouldn’t drink and drive. She’s coming home in a couple days Dean and the familiar setting may help her memory..Rowena is getting there with the spells especially now that she knows to tweak it to memory wise. We’re gonna get her memory back Dean..we will”  “I hope you’re right Sam, I really do”

------

Today was a big step in the right direction. You were finally checking out the hospital to head home. Eileen had mentioned Cas would be at the bunker when you got there so that meant at least for your physical wounds you could get healed, who knows maybe angel mojo would effect your memory as well? Not likely but it didn’t hurt to hope did it?

When the nurse knocked on the door she smiled to see you were tying your sneakers onto your feet. Eileen had stayed in the room with you while Dean went to pull the impala around to the exit you’d be coming out of. “Must I ride in the wheelchair? I mean I think I’m capable of walking” you asked and she grimaced “Sorry Mrs Evanson it’s hospital policy” Eileen winked at you then teased “Besides you get to ride in style out” riding in style was the collection of get well soon items that had found their way to your room from your friends. The one you liked the best was the little stuffed wolves that Garth and Bess had sent by Donna. The nurses didn’t quite understand the significance of them but you’d seen even a small smile work it’s way onto Dean’s face. Over the next few days though it was only supposed to be the four of you at the bunker well plus Cas. You weren’t being anti-social but you could also only bare so much guilt at a time from not remembering certain things.

Eileen bumped your arm and when you glanced her way she signed “Stop it” “You don’t read minds” you replied and she winked “No but you I can read” you sighed and climbed into the wheelchair while Eileen grabbed the bag carrying your presents. Sam was back at the bunker apparently switching your belongings to a different room. Eileen had let it slip that he offered to do it so Dean wouldn’t have to.

“Take me away” you told the nurse who smiled “I can say you have remained in good spirits the entire time you’ve been here and that bodes quite well for your recovery” you shrugged your good shoulder as she pushed you out the door “I can wallow or deal. I always work better by gritting my teeth and doing what I gotta do regardless”

------

The sun was bright in the sky when you finally were wheeled out of the exit. When Dean saw the three of you he quickly came around to open the passenger door and moved to help you but stopped just sigh of touching you then looked at your face for the ok. When you reached for his hand his whole body seemed to relax slightly “Mrs Evanson you have a follow up for a scan in three weeks but if any new symptoms occur such as headaches, blurry vision, dizziness feel free to come in before and if any pain outside the expected occurs feel free to come back in” 

“She will” Dean and Eileen answered in unison so you shot the nurse a smile “I have a lot of people looking after me. I’ll be fine”

After you were in the passenger seat the nurse waved then headed back inside. Eileen climbed in the backseat behind you and reached up to pat your shoulder reassuringly while Dean walked around to climb in the driver’s seat. “Ready to go?” he asked and you nodded “Let’s get home”

------

You vaguely remembered the internal set up of the bunker. You’d been there a time or two and even stayed the night once but as far as knowing it as well as you should considering how long you’d apparently been calling the bat cave home? You were far from it.

Eileen headed down the stairs first followed by Dean then you walking slowly down. Everything in the map room was pretty much how you remembered it including the angel sitting at the table talking to Sam who smiled when he saw the three of you “Y/N” you pulled him into a hug as best as you could “You’re a sight for sore eyes there Cas” he ducked his head and started to explain “I couldn’t exactly come to the hospital to heal you” “I understand Cas. Just saying it’s good to see you” he nodded then looked to your left arm “Can I?” “Please” you replied with an excited smile.

Cas had healed you before but it was always a bit surreal. He laid his hand palm down on your forehead and you felt the warmth spread throughout your body. You closed your eyes and felt your shoulder stitch itself back and the tender spot in your head from the fractured skull fade to a dull ache then disappeared all together.

When you opened your eyes everyone in the room was staring at you expectantly. You tried to force memories of being with Dean into your mind but they refused to come. You shook your head sadly “Healed me physically” “I’m sorry Y/N. Memory is something different than physical injuries” Cas apologized but you shook your head “No Cas. Thank you. Since the physical part is no longer an issue I can start trying to concentrate on my memory”

You didn’t miss the disappointed look in Dean’s eyes and apparently neither did Eileen because she touched your arm “Y/N why don’t I show you your room?” you smiled appreciatively at her “Sounds good. Cas are you staying?” he shook his head “No I’ve got to get back” you hugged him again “In that case be careful out there and thank you again” 

------

You heard the three guys talking while you let Eileen direct you down the hall and tried to block it out. One worry at a time. She pointed to one door “That’s mine and Sam’s room” then pointed to the next door “This one is empty” the door a little further down the hall she pointed to “Um this is Dean’s room” you swallowed hard at the unadded words which were “Until a few days ago this was your room as well” and followed her down to the room right to Dean’s “This one is yours”

You walked in behind her and looked around the room. You recognized the weapons laid about as your own. That was definitely your jacket tossed across the chair in the corner. A black blanket with red swirls was folded on the foot of the bed. When you touched it she smiled “That’s your blanket you usually want. Dean’s been using it but he got me to wash it and fold it for you” you nodded feeling very much overwhelmed “Um Eileen is it ok if I say I want to be alone?” she nodded “Of course. I’ll be in the library with the boys, your phone is on the charger so if you need me cause you know hollering for me won’t work” you managed a small laugh at that and signed “Thank you” since you know had use of both hands again.

She walked out and shut the door gently behind her. You sat on the edge of the bed and looked around the room. There was a since of familiarity tugging at you being in the bunker but you weren’t sure if it was true or just the fact of your own desire to remember. After a while you started feeling tired so you laid down across the bed pulling your blanket over you. A small nap wouldn’t hurt then maybe you could wander around a bit after everyone else went to bed.

------

You weren’t sure how long you’d been asleep when you heard a small knock at your door. You sat up smoothing a hand over your head “Yeah?” then kicked yourself when you realized it could be Eileen but the door opened before you could cross over to it and it was Sam standing in your doorway instead “Dean and Eileen ran into town to grab some food and a few other things we needed. I had to convince them both I would check on you” you smiled at that then stepped back so he could come into the room.

He sat down on the chair that your jacket was draped across so you sat down on the foot of the bed right across from him “How is he?” you asked and Sam raised an eyebrow “How are you?”

You sighed “Apparently I am in a stable relationship and can’t remember past being friends. At least Cas could get the wounds on the outside healed?” he nodded then glanced around before rubbing at the back of his neck “He’s ok” “Sam” you warned so he half smiled “He’s blaming himself of course. You were on the phone with him when the wreck happened” “Christ could it get any worse?” you groaned and Sam leaned up to gently touch your leg “Yeah. You could’ve died. We can deal with this. I know we can” you nodded and laid your hand on top of his “Thanks Sam” he smiled “So do you want to check out the rest of the bunker while it’s just the two of us or go back to sleep?”

“Can I sneek a peek in Dean’s room?” he shrugged “Hell why not?” You followed him out into the hall and stopped him right as he put his hand on the door leading into Dean’s room “Are you sure I should?” He nodded “Yeah. It may help” you took a breath and followed him in. The room didn’t look that much different then the one they had moved your things into at first then on second glance the differences popped out to you.

There was your shotgun on the wall underneath Dean’s. A photo of you, him, Eileen and Sam was on the nightstand. A few albums that were clearly your taste in music was next to his radio and there were two sets of headphones instead of one. You walked over slowly and picked up the photo. The boys were sitting on Jody’s couch and from the looks of it had pulled you and Eileen down into their lap probably seconds before the photo was snapped considering you and her were both laughing. “It was the day Alex got into nursing school” Sam explained coming to stand next to you looking over your shoulder at the photo. 

“We all look so happy” you whispered running your fingertips across Dean’s face. “You’ll get your memory back just give it time” he replied and you sighed then sat the photo down “I know. Let’s check out the rest of the bunker so maybe I can have my nerve enough to face Dean by the time they get back”

------

You had made your way into the library by the time Dean and Eileen came back from town. The few times you could remember coming here you’d been impressed by the extensive collection of lore this place held. You trailed your fingers along the spines of the books reading different titles. “I think you’ve read most of the books in here at least once” you heard from behind you and turned to see Dean leaned against the doorway watching you with a small smile on his face.

You sighed and said “Hopefully I’ll actually remember reading them sooner rather than later...well and other things too” the last part you added in a whisper but you saw the way his expression changed “Y/N I don’t care how long it takes I’m not going anywhere. You may not remember the last few years right now but I do, I know this is worth fighting for” “So you don’t blame yourself then?” you asked crossing your arms over your chest and saw the barest hint of a grin pulling at his lips again “Ok that look is too familiar and I’m guessing by you asking me that you’ve talked to Sam while we were gone?”

You nodded “Dean they said a drunk driver hit me. It wasn’t your fault hell if I hadn’t been on the phone with you it could've been a lot before all of you knew what had happened to me.” He nodded slowly “Not like you have always had a habit of kicking my ass if I’m too hard on myself” that made you laugh lightly “Ok that I do remember and yes someone needs to!” 

He nodded back towards the kitchen “We got some food. Eileen tried to remember what your favorite was but couldn’t quite remember so we got a few different things” You smiled “I’m sure I’ll like whatever I’ve never really been picky” the two of you stood there after that staring at each other for a few heartbeats before you heard Sam call yours and Dean’s names “Guessing that’s our cue to come eat?” “Guessing so” 

------

You sat next to Eileen at the table turned halfway towards her so if you said anything she wouldn’t have to turn to read your lips. Sam was sitting across from her and Dean was across from you. You always loved california rolls but now you were simply pushing them around in the little tray. “Not hungry?” Sam asked motioning to your plate. You shrugged “Guess not. Want them?” Eileen reached over before Sam could move “I’ll take them” you laughed at the look on Sam’s face “Snooze ya lose Winchester”

You glanced over at Dean’s plate to see the burger in front of him was barely touched as well “Dean you’re not gonna eat?” he shrugged “Not that hungry” you sighed and drank the last little bit of your lemonade then stood up “I think I’m gonna grab a shower and call it an early night” “If you need anything” Eileen started and you nodded then signed “I know”  Dean glanced up so you smiled “Night Dean” “Night Y/N” “Night Sam” you called over your shoulder before you walked out the kitchen and heard him say “Night” as you stepped into the hall.

------

Everything felt wrong. The bed felt wrong, your clothes felt wrong. There was a gaping hole craving the memories of the last three years and there was nothing you could do. You tossed and turned most of the night until finally calling it.

You dug around and found a thicker pair of socks so you pulled them onto your feet then grabbed the black and red blanket to wrap around your shoulders before stepping out into the hallway. You weren’t sure what part of the bunker you were headed to but you hoped maybe to clear the confusion in your head. The library called to you so you let your feet carry you in that direction.

You walked aimlessly around the rows of books letting your fingers graze some of them. God there was everything from classic literature that book collectors around the world would sell their souls for all the way to books describing just how bad of an idea that would be and why. You ended up not picking a book and instead just pulled out one of the chairs at the table and sat down.

You smiled when you saw Sam and Dean’s initials carved into the tabletop. It matched where they’d carved their names in the impala back when they were kids. You traced Dean’s initials and seriously considered waking him up to talk but decided against it. Just like you needed time to adjust you were quite certain he needed some time too. One moment he’d been with a woman for three years the next that woman didn’t even have a memory of a shared kiss.

You sighed and pushed away from the table. You had seen a laptop in your room hopefully it wasn’t password protected,maybe you could watch a movie or something.

Within a week and a half of being released from the hospital you were going absolutely stir crazy and what was even worse you knew everyone was sitting out of cases to be there with you.

You walked out of your room after grabbing a shower and headed towards the kitchen. Sam and Eileen were normally up before Dean you’d learned so you were hoping it was just the two of them again. When you walked around the corner you nearly froze in your tracks to see Dean pouring a cup of coffee. He cut his eyes up and almost smiled when he saw you then motioned with the coffee in his hand “Want a cup?” You mentally kicked yourself as a reminder to speak and forced a small smile onto your face “Please” 

He nodded and turned to grab another cup. You stood there not missing the looks Sam and Eileen were sharing while Dean poured the coffee and held the cup out to you. You took it from him letting your fingers barely touch his hand “Thanks Dean” “Sugar’s on the counter and creamer’s in the fridge” he replied with a tight smile then walked over to sit next to Sam.

You couldn’t help but over the conversation between the three of them which consisted of the fact that Donna apparently needed help and that Garth had asked Sam if him and Dean could check in on some strange occurrences. “Why don’t you all go?” you asked turning to face the three of them and repeating yourself in asl for Eileen. “We don’t want to leave you alone” you nodded slowly then said “I have a cell phone. Sam just gave me a new one all set up yesterday. Not to mention I’m in literally one of the safest places on earth. I think I can manage for a day or two. Seriously I feel horrible that I’m keeping all three of you cooped up, go I’ll be fine”

The three of them knew you well enough to know that if you had your mind set on something you were far too stubborn to let it go that easily. Sam and Eileen shared a few hushed words followed by Sam and Dean having a whispering match before Dean finally sighed loudly “Fine! I’ll meet you outside in twenty”

You watched him walk out then glanced at Sam questioningly “What was that about?” “He still doesn’t feel comfortable leaving you but he agreed to go check out Garth’s lead” Eileen looked up from her phone with a grin “I texted Donna that I’ll come help her and she said to tell you and I quote can’t wait till Y/N is back in action. I miss her face” you laughed lightly and said “Well be careful and tell Donna I miss her face too”

------

Sam and Eileen left to go grab what they needed so you wandered back towards your room but stopped when you saw Dean’s bedroom door was open. You knocked lightly on it and half a second later he stepped around it and stopped in his tracks when he realized it was in fact you and not Sam or Eileen. “Y/N..something wrong?” you shook your head “No I was just wondering if maybe I could talk to you just for a second?” 

He stepped to the side and waved a hand into the room “Of course” you walked in and sat in one of the chairs at the small table in his room so he sat across from you. You took a deep breath before saying “Dean..if my memory doesn’t come back” “It will” he cut you off and you couldn’t help but smile at just how certain he sounded “Please let me talk” “Sorry go ahead”

You reached across the table and grabbed his hand. He stared down at your intertwined fingers as you started to speak again “If my memory doesn’t come back and you want to move on there’s no hard feelings” his eyes flew up to yours “Sweetheart I knew you’d hit your head hard but damn I didn’t realize it’d done you that bad” “What?” you asked with a shocked laugh. 

He slowly raised your joined hands up to his mouth before just barely letting his lips brush across your knuckles “Y/N listen to me good here darling....I love you more than I ever dreamt possible. A future for me? Naw I never really thought about it before you but since the moment you first told me you love me I feel like maybe one day I can actually be the man worthy of you. I’m never walking away from you. If it takes two months or twenty years, I’ll still be right here” you had tears in your eyes by the time he’d finished talking “Christ no wonder I’m in love with you. Who would’ve thought Dean Winchester is a romantic at heart” he chuckled before saying “Only for you sweetheart..only for you” 

You pulled your hand from his and saw his face fall slightly before you said “Come home in one piece?” “Nothing could keep me from you” he replied and you had a sense of almost dejavu as if that was something that was said a lot between the two of you but you didn’t want to ask and get his hopes up just for dejavu. 

“Dean..you ready to go?” Sam called from the hall but stopped when he saw the two of you sitting across from each other “Or we can wait. A few minutes wont hurt” you held Dean’s eyes as you said “No Sam, you two need to get going. I’m gonna go see Eileen off” you stood to walk out but stopped to pat Sam’s shoulder “I expect you both back here just the way you’re leaving”

“Bye Dean” “Bye Y/N” you smiled at Sam then headed to tell Eileen your usual parting and wish her a safe hunt.

------

Everyone was due back to the bunker within a few hours so you were currently folding laundry in your room. Things were starting to hold a sense of familiarity to them but you weren’t certain if it was true or if you were simply wanting to remember so badly you were tricking your own brain into saying it remembered when it truly didn’t.

You’d started texting with Jody, Alex and Claire. You felt horrible that you didn’t remember Claire’s girlfriend Kaia or the newest addition to the wayward daughters as you called them Patience but the girls were more than understanding and were wading in little by little to catch you up on any and all memories involving them. 

Your phone chimed from where it sat next to the bed so you walked over to pick it up and saw a text from Sam which read “We’re two hours away and Eileen is an hour out” you smiled knowing everyone was safe and texted back “Make it back in one piece and then I’ll be happy” then sat the phone down and returned to putting your laundry away.

You pulled out one drawer and stopped. Your socks and undergarments were in it but you had a flash of t-shirts being in the top drawer. Must have simply been mistaken. You finished up then headed into the library where you’d been scrolling through news websites to catch up.

------

You must have been invested in the article you were currently reading because when Eileen tapped on your shoulder you jumped. When you looked up she said “You’re a hunter and I scared you!” “You didn’t make any noise! Besides my guard is down in here” she shook her head but laughed “Nice to see you in a good mood” you motioned around “It’s starting to feel like a sense of being at home here” you knew you could confide in her without it reaching Dean and possibly getting his hopes up for nothing.

Her smile grew as she pulled out the chair next to you and sat down “That’s really good news” you and her sat there talking for the next while and were still talking when you heard the bunker door open so you signed “Our boys are home” she smiled and glanced over her shoulder about the time Sam and Dean walked down the stairs but both of your faces fell when you saw the cuts and scratches littering both of their faces.

She was on her feet to Sam’s side and without hesitation you were at Dean’s side before you could even think about it. “What the hell happened?” you asked gently touching the deepest cut that ran right across Dean’s left cheek “Couple witches hexed a couple vamps. Made them a little harder to kill. No big deal sweetheart” he replied flinching slightly as you turned his head to look at the different cuts and you shook your head then glanced at Eileen “You got your idiot cause I’m gonna go patch this one up and call Cas to see when he came come through the heal them” she nodded so you grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled him behind you out of the library and down the hall to his bedroom.

------

Dean sat on the side of his bed while you fussed over the cuts on his face and neck. “Did you kill the witches? Because if not I’m gonna find them and shove their damn broomsticks up their asses” you finished cleaning the cuts and stopped when you realized he was staring at you

“What?” he shook his head letting just the barest hint of a smile play on his lips “I love when you’re all fiery” when you dipped your head just enough that hair fell in front of your face he knew that was one of your tells that you’d gotten embarrassed so he reached up to push the hair back gently and felt his heart flip when you actually leaned into his touch “I love everything about you Y/N. I don’t mean to embarrass you or make you feel weird about it since you can’t remember but you patching me up and fussing about me being hurt? It feels normal or normal for us anyways” you covered his hand with your own and smiled “I want us back Dean”

“We’ll get there sweetheart. Rowena said a few more days and a few more continents she should have her hands on everything she needs” you nodded then pulled away from him slowly “I need to put this first aid kit up” he watched you move around and wanted to say something that would make you feel better but really didn’t have an idea as to what to say.

You stopped at the doorway and glanced back at him “Is it weird if I ask you to take me for a ride in the impala?” he shook his head “Not at all. When do you want to go?” your smile pulled one to his own face “Let me grab my jacket” you glanced at his dresser for a second then added “Are your t-shirts in the top drawer?” he looked between you and the dresser then nodded slowly “Yeah..why?” “No reason” you replied then went in search of your jacket and to return the first aid kit to the kitchen.

------

You weren’t sure where Dean was headed but sitting next to him watching him drive felt so natural. You’d known him for years but it was like your heart was remembering even when your brain was refusing to. “Want to pull over or just keep driving? It’s a quarter moon but it’s pretty bright out if you want to park and talk?” he suggested and you nodded “Please”

You watched as he found a pull off and drove back to an open field. When he killed the engine he cut his eyes at you “You coming?” you smiled and climbed out behind him. He walked to the front of the car then sat on the hood leaned back against the windshield so you sat next to him making sure your boots were hanging off the side to not scratch the paint. Thousands of stars were dotted across the sky and although the moon was only a quarter it was bright. You could hear a few crickets far off and a slight breeze was in the air not enough to make it cold but enough to make your jacket comfortable.

You cut your eyes at him twice before he said “You can lean your head over on me Y/N. I won’t bite” “What if I asked you to?” you joked but had another sense of dejavu hit you. He pulled you over onto his chest leaning further back while you got comfortable “You know you said that to me the first night we slept together” he spoke after a moment.

It was the first time he’d actually talked about your relationship. You knew it was because he didn’t want to push your memory. You had your head laying against his chest and could hear his heart beating steadily under you. “Who kissed who first?” you asked and his answering laugh vibrated through your entire body “Believe it or not you kissed me first” you turned to look at him and he shrugged so you asked “Tell me?” 

He nodded and leaned his head back to stare at the night sky “We were fresh off a possession case. Me and Sam had been working it and you rolled through nearby. Eileen was with the twins working a case so you offered to help us. After it was all said and done Sam headed back to the hotel but me and you decided to grab a beer” you hadn’t realized just how much you were hanging onto his every word until he grinned “You’re staring there Y/N” “Oh hush. You’re telling me about our first kiss I get to stare” 

“Fair enough” he replied with a nod then continued “Anyways. We got to the bar, grabbed our drinks and then headed to a corner table. We were talking about the job, the life we live. You were the most beautiful woman in the place and you were sitting there in jeans and one of my flannels since your shirt had gotten torn during the fight and you had a scratch right across the top of your collarbone that flashed when you moved just the right way. I’d been trying to figure out a way to ask you if you’d ever consider being with another hunter for weeks by that point. You got up to grab us another round and I admit I watched your ass while you walked to the bar but you hadn’t even gotten the beer yet when some drunk asshole decided to grab your ass”

“How did that go over?” you asked pretty much already knowing the answer. Dean tilted his head with a hint of a smirk “I may have broken his jaw in a few different places. Luckily the bartender saw everything so she snuck us over the bar and out the back about the time the police were coming in the front. We hightailed it out of there and headed back to the hotel. I walked you to your door even though you were right next to us. You told me you could’ve handled it and at first I thought you were pissed at me for stepping in but then you added that you thought it was the sexiest thing you’d ever seen. You kissed me then asked if I wanted to grab coffee the next morning before we all headed our different directions”

The happiness in Dean’s eyes as he spoke about the two of you made your heart ache. You loved him, that much you were sure of even if you couldn’t remember the details as to why. “Was it just me for you from there on?” you asked and when he looked at you god your heart skipped more than a few beats at the emotion those green eyes held “No one else would’ve stood a chance” you leaned closer to him and just barely let your lips brush against his in a tentative kiss. When he didn’t push you away you deepened it moving closer to him. He groaned into the kiss when your hands slid across his chest coming up to play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

One of his hands came to grip your thigh closest to him and he gave it a tug pulling you on top of him never breaking the kiss. You straddled his waist breaking from his lips to kiss down his neck. The grip on your hips tightened when you kissed on top of his pulse point “Y/N...sweetheart..baby stop” you froze the moment he said stop and looked at him in confusion “What’s wrong?” he swallowed hard before saying “Don’t get me wrong because fuck I’ve missed kissing you but we can’t do this. Not until you get more of your memory back. The moment you do I promise to keep you in bed for days but for now we can’t”

You nodded and left another quick kiss on his lips before sliding off of him and the hood of the car. He stood up after you and wrapped both arms around you “I love you Y/N” you nodded leaning back against him “I know Dean” the two of you stood there in silence for the longest just enjoying being close to each other until you shivered. “Let’s get back” he said so you nodded with a sigh “Will you watch a movie or something with me when we get back?” he nodded and kissed your cheek “Of course”

You paced across the floor glancing towards the table in the center of the room every now and then. The redhead working over the large silver bowl stopped in the middle of a movement “Y/N..dear I have grown quite fond of you actually but if you don’t stop that incessant pacing I will lock you out until I need you” 

You held your hands up defensively “Sorry Rowena. I guess I’m just nervous” “Understandably but just take a breath” you nodded and sat down at the table across the room. She smiled then went back to her work. You looked up when the door opened and gave a small smile to Eileen “The boys are on their way back” “It’ll be done before they get here” Rowena said not looking up so you repeated it to Eileen who questioned why your eyes got wider.

Eileen sat down next to you and drew you into a conversation about a few hunt years back and that managed to keep your attention until Rowena cleared her throat. The both of you looked up so she waved you over “It’s time” Eileen walked next to you so you gave her hand a small squeeze before stepping over to the table “Give me your hand” Rowena spoke so you held your hand out palm up. She picked up a silver dagger and slid it across your skin. You watched as your blood dripped onto the mixture in the bowl and it glowed a deep silver.

Rowena spoke the incantation of which you only caught half the words because while some was latin the rest was a language you didn’t recognize. After a moment the silver turned to a shimmering black. Rowena dipped a red wine glass into the bowl and held it out “Drink it all” you looked at the liquid and swallowed hard. You’d drank worse before. You looked at Eileen who nodded so you toasted her and Rowena “Here’s to our health ladies” then tipped the entire glass back in one go. “How do you feel?” Eileen asked and you started to say you felt fine then the world took on a fuzzy haze and you felt yourself falling right before your vision went black.

------

“Y/N..wake up..sweetheart” you could hear Dean’s voice and forced your eyes open. “She’s awake” he breathed in relief. You were laying on a makeshift pallet in the armory. “Told you I know what I’m doing” Rowena chastised then crouched down into your view. “Y/N..how do you feel dear?” you looked at Dean before answering Rowena “I feel amazing. I remember everything” you could hear Eileen and Sam both thanking Rowena but your eyes were glued to Dean who whispered “I love you Y/N” you pulled him down into a kiss before whispering “I love you too Dean. Nothing could keep me from you either”

Tagging @girl-next-door-writes for the bingo challenge and @akshi8278 cause it's Dean

[whosjunglejim4322]

Umbra | J.Seo (m) 2

》 Genre: vampire au! Smut, fluff, minor angst and mentions of violence, This story also features Yuta, Taeyong, Jaehyun, Jungwoo, Doyoung and Mark as his coven members, hints towards poly x reader

》 Warnings: dick sucking, pussy eating, Johnny lowkey being a soft dom, daddy kink....I know y'all saw it coming don't even yell at me, you almost get eaten by a bad vampire but Yuta says not on my watch, Jungwoo being THEE bestest boy, mentions of marking/biting, masturbation...this is nasty I'm sorry, this story also eludes to action based violence, guest appearance by Kim Jongin

Johnny's self control wilts down to almost nothing with you, a real issue when you're in situations like this, literally begging to suck his cock despite the fact that his immortal brothers are right downstairs.

"Please, let me suck you off, pleaaassse?"

You're too good at this, but more than that you actually really are that desperate to have him in your mouth. He can feel it all around you, like a current rippling around a vibrating force. More so, he can smell it. His mouth waters.

"Fuck - you're really really misbehaving right now," He clenches his jaw as if he's agitated but you know by the way he allows you to stroke his length, by the way that he grinds his hips along with your rubbing that you've won.

"You really want it that bad? Hmm?" He grasps your chin firmly between two of his fingers, eyes low like that of a wild animal while he gazes into you. Your fervent nod is all that you use to reply while you shuffle down onto your knees, splaying your fingers across the meat of his thick thighs.

"You've barely even kissed me all day Johnny, it's the least you could do for me." You're exaggerating about the kissing part, but your teasing smile makes up for it, so does your palm tracing the protruding outline of his hard on.

Your eyes are so big, so innocent staring up at him from between his legs and he can't take it. Not when you're acting as if sucking him off is something that is an act of pleasure for you, like you need it.

"I'm sorry baby, didn't mean to neglect you," His resolve has been completely demolished, smashed to smithereens as your fingers undo the button of his jeans. "go ahead."

He presses his heels off the ground and lifts his hips, aiding you in pulling his pants off of his narrow hips, along with his black briefs. You really are impatient, not even bothering to pull either of the garments all the way down past his knees and barely letting his dick spring free from the confines.

He lets out a hiss when you wrap your hand around him so eagerly, bringing your lips to the thick of his shaft near his balls and pressing open mouthes kisses along the silky skin, ascending. He cradles your face all the while, biting back a groan when you circle your tongue around his plum tip.

You hum while he slips to the back of your throat, his cock only halfway in your mouth, pressing against your uvula. His jaw clenches, fingers clawing at his couch and chin in the air with the way he's thrown his head back against the cushions.

He always forgets just how good your mouth feels, how warm and wet and soft it is. You're so sloppy in your gratitude, and it's so endearing, so sweet and nasty. You pull him out just to kitten lick the tip, and the muscles in his thighs tense.

"Oh shit baby, yeah," he pants, reaching out to move bits of your hair that have fallen into your face. You take just the smooth head past your lips, hollowing your cheeks. "juuuust like that."

You sort of regret looking up at him through your lashes and seeing the downright dirty expression he's wearing so unabashedly, tongue wetting his plush lips while he captures your gaze like a deer in headlights.

The eye contact causes a profuse flutter to swarm in your belly, the burn of lust seeping between your thighs and engorging your clit until it's throbbing. You whine, the sound reverberating around his length as your throat constricts around him, and you gag, saliva dribbling down the veins of his shaft.

"Fuck, be careful baby," he taunts, purposely bucking his hips, only slightly as to prompt the sound from you again. You oblige him happily, driven by the gruffness of his tone. "your little throat might not be able to take all of daddy's dick."

Need surges through you like you've just been submerged in ice water, the feeling starting from the tips of your fingers and toes, the tip of your tongue. It leaves a tingling sensation in it's wake.

Without thinking, you use your free hand - the one that's not wrapped around the rest of his length that you aren't able to reach - and slip it down between your legs, rubbing yourself through your bottoms. It's all too much and you're so wet, so lost in the way prospect of it all.

He sees you, of course, but he doesn't have the heart to stop you. Not when he knows how horny you are, how badly you need to be touched. Really, if it weren't for the fact that you're so jubilantly sucking his dick right now, he'd rip you from off the floor and eat you till you're raw - but that'll come soon enough.

He's content for now, holding your face while you swirl your tongue around his aching dick, and he can hear the squelch of your wetness as you fuck yourself with your fingers. His throat burns at the thought of tasting it.

You quiver, and he realizes the pleasure you're giving yourself is making you falter, and he coos your name. "Look at you," he sounds awed, high off of the moment. "I'm gonna fuckin' cum, keep touching yourself like that."

And you do, despite the fact that it's got you all wobbly and sloppy. But he's okay with you just suckling the tip of his dick like you are, cheek against his thigh while your tongue licks his frenulum. It's when you look up at him like he's the whole world and more and he can see just how fucked out you are, lost in the haziness of the act, that he feels the muscles in his abdomen tense, eyes going black while the wave of ecstasy washes through him.

You swallow his cum greedily, moaning around his twitching length while the sweetness envelopes you from inside out. He hisses through his teeth while you mouth at his still inflated cock, before the floor shifts from underneath your knees and suddenly you're lying back against the bouncy cushions of the leather sofa.

"Look how wet that made you," cool air breezes against your sopping, naked sex, and you realize that the blur of fabric that you've just seen tossed behind him is your pants. "your little clit is swollen and everything."

His index and ring finger form a v shape as he spreads your lips apart, marveling at the stickiness that decorates your folds in wet strings. His free arm hooks around your right thigh and with a simple jerk he pulls you just inches away from his awaiting mouth.

Only one whine slips from your throat before he encapsulates your bud with his soft, cool lips - eyes trained on you while he twirls his skilled tongue in circles around it. He pulls away with an obnoxious, lewd sucking sound before diving back in, and your fingers reach for the front of his hair where it falls in his face.

You wonder how someone can be so skilled in all departments, it's utterly unfair. His tongue is fast, avaricious yet somehow so precise, never concentrating on one place too long and always giving you exactly what you need where you need it.

Even the image of him between your legs has you jerking, trying desperately to fight the way your eyes are shutting closed. The sound you made must have been pleasant to him - you're not sure yourself because all you can hear is his slurping and your own heartbeat - and he chuckles menacingly, pulling back to admire your spit soaked center. He keeps the pad of his thumb against your swollen clit.

"Talk to me baby, come on," he brings his mouth to hover over your heat, teasing you will the coolness of his breath. His smile is toothy when you whimper. "tell me how good I make you feel."

You writhe, grinding against his face when he uses the tip of his pink muscle to lick at your folds, your entrance. "You make me feel so good, so so good please please, don't stop." This satiates him, his vigor returning while you feel two of his fingers abruptly slide into you, the glide effortless.

You're loud now, completely forgetting about the rest of the houses inhabitants - and he has to from there way he curls the two digits, massaging your spongy walls in a come hither motion.

It's just what you needed to be on the verge of bliss, eyes shut tightly while you lose half of the strength in your already wobbly limbs, allowing him to hold you against his face while he eats until he's full.

You manage to reach down and grip onto his bicep, flexing and bulging underneath your fingertips from the way he fucks his fingers into your hole.

"Daddy...ohhhh daddy, mmm." You're slurring on your words but he hears them loud and clear, and a sound so jarring leaves his throat that you manage to pull yourself together enough to look down.

It never doesn't cause an automatic reaction of thrill to surge through your chest, like having the wind knocked out of you. The inky darkness fills his eyes, waterline violently red and you can see sharp, white teeth behind parted lips each time he licks a stripe through your cunt.

The force of your orgasm leaves you silent for a moment, like being submerged under water and all you can hear is the sound of your own blood rushing through your veins, the outside world a muffled melody.

You're still aware that his mouth hasn't given up, even as you leak and twitch and pull at his hair with a force that would hurt a human - but it only makes him harder, more greedy.

The pleasure still thrums in your bones as you come down, muscles flexing reflectively from the aftershocks, your palm against his forehead finally convincing him to hold off. Gentleness replaces his covet, and soft wet plucks of warmth are being spread across your thighs, in between them. Then, against your lips.

"Are you okay? Open your eyes so I know you aren't dead." The boop of his nose against yours along with his silliness has you giggling suddenly, despite the fact that you're still throbbing between your legs.

"I'll keep them closed as long as I want, I deserve it after that." You state, feigning resistance while crossing your arms over your chest. He's Johnny, though, so you're not surprised to feel the ghost of his mouth against the collumn of your throat, his breathing deliberate.

"Can you blame me? You don't make it very easy." He kisses your jaw, down to your chin and then to your lips, and you succumb. Just as he grasps your face, you feel the tip of his dick graze your sensitive center, and your gasp has him smiling against your mouth.

He pulls away, pulling his jeans up fast - but not fast enough - and you pout seeing that his dick is still so hard, obvious and bulging. As if already sensing what you're gonna say, he rolls his eyes, grabbing your bottoms from the floor and slipping them past your feet, up your thighs.

"I'm fine, more than fine. It's just vampire stamina, baby." He smirks and you fight back your whine, not being able to stop the joyous swelling of your heart whenever you even glance in his direction.

Once your pants are on you curl up to his side, nuzzling your face against the firmness of his chest. "Why do you want to neglect yourself so much? Is having sex with me soooooo taxing?" You tease, knowing he's scowling at you for the implication at all. What can you say? You're a menace.

"You're silly, ridiculous even. If I put my dick in you now, we won't be done until the sun falls. I'd rather not push it," he strokes your arms, your back. You wrap your arms around his torso. "plus Jungwoo and I were going to stop by the bank and feed, I'll need to get you home before then."

At this you sit up, his expression neutral while you turn to face him. "Why can't I stay?" You aren't quite sure how he feels about this, his dark eyebrows furrowing slightly, as if contemplating, while his hands play with your fingers.

"You want to spend the night in a house full of vampires?" Anyone else who hears his tone would think he's upset, mocking your judgement even - but you know him enough to tell that he's actually just perplexed, curious.

"I want to spend the night with you, in your room. I know it may seem stupid but I just-" his hands come to cradle your face, lips shushing you with a gentle peck. The contact has you hazy when he pulls away.

"None of that, remember? It's not stupid, I want you here too, of course. But I'll be gone come midnight to go with Jungwoo, I know that no harm will come to you but I have to know that you're comfortable."

You stroke his cheek with your thumb, heart doing flips at the prospect of actually being able to sleep in his room surrounded by things he enjoys, in a setting that involves him more than it does you. You smile shyly.

"I'm comfortable, really. I trust you, and I trust your weird vampire rules too." You're being honest, and maybe it sounds sketchy from an outside perspective - but nothing in your body feel inherently afraid. Maybe it's Jungwoos warm aura despite being frozen and youthful, or maybe it's your own stupidity - but you feel safe, oddly enough.

"I have shirts and pants in the closet there, in the black drawers," he points to a door just to the left of you both, and you realize you completely missed it. "and I can order some food for you."

You wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him again while pleasant thoughts about the evenings plans begin to fill your head.

You're not sure what time it is when you awake, the blare of the movie you'd passed out while watching playing on his flat screen. It's the only light in the room and between flashes of scenes you struggle to find your phone, grabbing it once it's in your grasp.

12:30 AM.

You sit up, stretching your arms above your head. Once you'd eaten the takeout Johnny had delivered, you couldn't fight the need for sleep, and you're a bit annoyed now that you hadn't stayed up a little while longer. At least until he had to leave.

You yawn, and it occurs to you than your throat is dry, very dry. You search your surroundings for the water bottle you had earlier, but your hand smacks the empty container and sends it flying - a sigh leaving your lips.

You shouldn't. You really shouldn't, this wasn't part of the agreement - wandering off through the house on your own, especially not when he's gone. Your feet are moving before you make a conscious decision.

It's not like he expected you to just stay in his room, right? He would have told you specifically, sternly. Plus, you want something to drink, hopefully they have ice, or water. Of course they have water, dummy. Your hand wraps around his doorknob, and the darkness of the home greets you when you walk out, dressed in one Johnny's shirts and a pair of his sweats.

It's eery, you'll admit that much. The pale, bright moonlight streams through the huge picture windows at the end of the hallways, and you keep track of the turns you're making as to not get lost. The floor doesn't even creak, despite the house looking so historically ancient; a mirror of their age, in some ways.

Once you've arrived at the grand staircase, you're confident that the huge double doors to the left at the end of the steps, is the kitchen. Or a dungeon. You'll know soon enough. You take a paranoid look behind you, into the hallway you've just come from and back down to the corridor, before making your descent.

It is a kitchen, in fact. You can tell even that much in the dim lighting, a huge high wooden table sat elegantly in the middle, lined with stools that look as though they swivel. In the corner you can make out the shape of a fridge.

You feel too lucky, giggling like a schoolgirl whos just found a jar full of candy in her teachers desk. It's a miracle you haven't been caught, but your thoughts are suddenly elsewhere when your fingers wrap around the handle of the refrigerator, victory seeping into your bones at last while you think of the ice cold glass of water you get to enjoy and-

"There's nothing in there that will suit your tastes, sweetheart."

The yelp you let out is loud and echoes in the obscenely large kitchen, your hand clamping over your mouth while the muscles in your body ache with the aftershock of your fright. You turn around only to make sure you haven't just been spoken to by a ghost, almost positive that no one was here when you entered.

Yuta sits casually, perched in a stool at the far end of the dining room table. His skin is like silk in the little light that gleams from outside into the room, and you find yourself frozen; despite the fact you so vehemently swear to yourself you're not afraid.

You see his head cock to the side, only his smile visible from where you're at, blinding and oddly menacing considering the context. "Don't be so shy, I won't bite." He coos, and you unthaw just a bit.

"I'm not shy, you just scared me." You speak quietly, slowly but surely moving towards the table, only a few seats away from where he's sat. Your answer seems to ruminate in his mind for a while, his lithe hands clasped together.

"What are you searching for, anyways? Hmm?" His tone is oddly soft, melodic like music traveling through the air. You answer him almost immediately, deciding to sit directly next to him in an effort to prove you're not intimidated. Even if it's a lie.

"I was just thirsty...for water." He chuckles and suddenly his features are clearer somehow, standing out against the onyx shadows. You can feel his eyes on you but you keep your head down, worried about slipping up.

"Certainly, after the night you've had," he's there one minute, in his seat and as still as stone, and then he's gone. Before you have a chance to gasp at the cool breeze that whips past you, a glass is sat in front of you, straw included. "It must be so easy for him to forget how much you little humans need for survival."

He's back in his seat and suddenly you feel naked, knowing that well, they probably heard, but forgetting that they aren't bashful about their thoughts. Yuta finds it fascinating, the way you're shrinking in your chair. You swallow.

"Why didn't you and the others go with them? Johnny and Jungwoo, I mean." You take a sip of your water, and then other, and soon half the glass is gone as the vampire next to you eyes you with his inquisitive gaze.

"I prefer less orthodox methods of satiating my hunger, blood banks are just too...diluted." You ignore the shiver that wracks through you, humming in response. He leans forward, further into the light, and you meet his wild eyes for the first time tonight.

"Your pulse is fluttering like butterflies in a jar," The corner of his plush mouth turns upwards, pearly whites on show. "are you sure you aren't scared?" His lilt is too imperceptible, and you're not able to tell if he's genuinely concerned or testing your ability to maintain composure under pressure. You steady your breathing.

"If I were scared, I would have run out the moment you spooked me in the dark like a madman." Your reply prompts a laugh to bubble from his throat and the sound is surprisingly gleeful this time, his normally menacing eyes forming into crescent moons.

"You are funny, aren't you? Tell me, then," he tilts his chin, raven hair falling against his cheek as he questions you. "why didn't you run?" His eyebrows furrow, and the genuine query takes you by surprise.

To be honest, you're not exactly sure how to answer. You aren't sure yourself, but you answer anyways. You're here, after all. Turning back around would be worth nothing.

"I don't really know. I think you're kind of...unexpected. I mean, I was told you guys aren't a lot different than him, than Johnny. But it's even more striking up close." You don't expect the truth to be so freeing or easy to say out loud once you've spoken, but you're oddly more at ease. The vampire is quiet for a moment.

"Striking? My my, you are perplexing. You're telling the truth too, so often your kind are deliberately... deceptive...how odd." He sounds as if he's talking amongst himself rather than to you, but his eyes still implore into yours.

"What do you mean? If you can tell whether or not some ones lying, then what use is it to lie?" You question, interest piqued. If his mischievous smile is anything to go by, he's willing to indulge you.

"Out of fear, lust, greed. Nothing unusual. It's only natural to tell someone exactly what it is they want to hear, especially when their teeth are against your throat."

Strangely, he doesn't sound as ferocious as the statement may make it seem. If anything, it's as if there's more than one meaning to what he's said, but you don't ruminate on it. You're not even sure how long this willingness to conversate will last.

"And vampires don't fear? Or lust, or covet." You're probably pushing it, but it's too fascinating not to. It's like being in a cage with a great white just inches away from you, as if it couldn't break through the barrier and eat you alive if it were hungry enough. The faux security blanket makes you feel invincible.

"Of course we do," his thumbs twirl casually, long black nails clanking together. "but you see, we are only living up to people's preconceived notions, aren't we? Volatile, bloodthirsty...why put on a show if you aren't going to finish it?"

You shake your head at the vampire, and he clicks his tongue. "That may be true, most of us do think that way. I don't think I ever really had an opinion, until I met Johnny. And even meeting you, of course you're all capable of horrible things but look at what humans do to others on a daily basis."

Silence follows, not awkward or tense, just the steady rise and fall of your breathing, his impenetrable irises examining you for a minute. You figure he's had enough of talking to you for tonight, and you press your heels to the floor in an effort to get up from your stool - but his cold hand is pressed against your chest before you can get move from your seat.

Your heart beats a total of two drums before you're suddenly pulled behind him, your brain trying to process what's just happened in such a short amount of time. He's almost crouched, nose in the air like a bloodhound while his hand reaches back behind him to keep you pressed against him.

"Yuta what-"

"Someone's....here."

A loud, intrusive cracking sound erupts through the kitchen, splinters of wood flying around the shield of Yutas lithe body while what seems to be violent hissing leaves the vampires throat. Your face is against his shoulder blades and you regret taking a peek to see what - or who - is growling like that in front of him - and panic fills your throat with bile.

The man is unfamiliar and you'd think he was a vampire if it weren't for how different he looks from the others - wild, crazed. His lips are pulled back in a snarl as Yuta shouts something at the creature in a foreign language, and your body shakes with tremors at the sight of the mans mouthful of razor sharp teeth.

Another blur bursts through the kitchens mangled doors, and then another, and another, and you don't know what else to do so you cling on to the back of Yutas silky shirt, unaware that the new visitors are some of the homes residents.

"Take her!" Yuta shouts, and your blood runs cold at the implication, the snarling still ripping from the creatures throats. You let go of him and prepare to run but you slam into something hard, nearly falling to the ground if cool hands didn't reach out and steady you by your shoulders.

You look up, and Jungwoos serene expression sends a wave of calmness through your bones, his voice soothing and steady despite the whirlwind happening around you both. Something made of glass breaks behind you.

"It's okay, I'm here to protect you but we have to go, now." You're pulled to his chest before you can object, getting just a small, nearly missable glimpse of the ugly creatures that Yuta and what seems to be Jaehyun - maybe Taeyong but you can't tell - are fighting off, and you suddenly realize just how scary vampires can really be.

It's like being in a car, a nice car that doesn't even jolt when it passes deep potholes in the asphalt. Except, of course, this theoretical car doesn't have doors or a windshield and you can hear - and feel - the wind whipping around you, whistling in your ears.

It's only a few more seconds, maybe even just a minute before his inhuman pace slows and you recognize the hum of an conditioner, the scent of alcohol and the padding of his shoes against a hardwood floor. He stops completely and your eyes are still shut tight, fingers clinging onto the front of him as though you might fall off the face of the earth if you let go.

"You're like a newborn deer, your legs are all wobbly." Jungwoo chuckles, amused and the sound of his voice breaks you from your fear induced reverie - eyelids peeling open to see where exactly it is that your boyfriends coven brother has taken you.

Violet and maroon lights glow around you, illuminating the place with a neon aura. It's a bar, from what you can tell, the stools and countertop and bottles of miscellaneous substances stacked on shelves behind it. It's pristine, you can see even that in such dim lighting.

"Why - what's going on? I don't underst-" Jungwoo shushes you with a finger to your lips, shaking his head as if to dismiss any of your worries before they come to a front.

"It's okay sweet pea, don't worry your pretty little head about it." You grit your teeth, but before you can offer any sort of rebuttle, the door to what you assume is the entrance you came in, swings open and a swarm of familiar faces fill the space around you, your eyes searching for Johnny in the midst.

He's not there, and your chest begins to ache badly with anxiety. This whole thing is confusing and bewildering and you're not sure what to make of it, especially when no one seems to be answering your questions, talking amongst themselves.

"It was a Lampir, a fucking Lampir." Yuta spits, chest heaving and eyes still black. Doyoung approaches him, arms crossed over his chest.

"We know why, the minute we get involved with a human those pests come to bother us." You see why the vampire had been so indifferent before.

"Hold on hold on, if it's a Lampir then it had to have been sent by Jongin. They wouldn't come to our home without orders." Taeyong reasons. You find a seat in one of the bar stools, lying your head down on the countertop.

"Definitely. Jongin is like, super old and stuff and you know how he can get - do you think he wants her?" Mark inquires too casually, your body alert now, and your need for Johnnys presence becoming unbearable.

As if your thoughts were as loud as your yearning, the door opens once again and a familiar head of raven hair is the first thing you see, messy and disheveled. You're on your feet and slamming yourself against him before your eyes even meet, and at once you're home.

You don't even realize you're crying until he's patting your head gently, then your back and down your arms while he cradles you against his chest, cooing in that warm velvet tone. "Shh, it's okay you're okay, I'm here. You're safe." He's reassuring himself, as well.

You sniffle, pulling away just a fraction of an inch to peer up at him, to confirm you're not going through panic induced hullicinations.

Warm, honey eyes stare back at you and you breathe a true sigh of relief, large hands cradling your face. Reflectively, the words leave your mouth.

"Who's Jongin?" While wiping a wet tear from tour cheek with the pad of his thumb, his expression sours, and you are suddenly fully aware that something bigger is happening, something that you've been left out on. he looks up at one of his brothers.

"That thing...he was definitely ordered." He holds you close and continues stroking your skin, the sound of his voice - even when laced with annoyance and anger soothing to your senses. A strange scent dances underneath your nose and it's only now you realize his shirt is stained with something black, like tar.

You remove your head from his chest to examine the front of his garment, wondering how you hadn't noticed it before. It's in this brief moment that you realize they've all gone completely silent, faces contorting as if they're speaking but their mouths are closed - eyes shifting back and forth from one another.

You back up a fraction of an inch, enough to capture Johnny's attention and his brothers alike, your eyebrows furrowing accusingly. They're hiding something. Your skin feels itchy.

"What are you all doing?" You glance from Jaehyun, who's dimples are on show as he holds back a laugh - to Jungwoo who looks as though he'd be flushing in shame if we able - and then to your boyfriend, who couldn't hide his feelings or emotions even if he tried.

He takes a step towards you, preparing to open his mouth but Doyoung steps in front of him, pressing a hand to Johnny's chest. "Don't. She knows enough about us." His tone is bitter, filled with resentment and your stomach lurches uncomfortably, your boyfriends fingers wrapping around his brothers wrist and flinging his hand off of him in an instant. His eyes are suddenly furious, and again, you're missing something.

"Stop this at once, you're being childish. This involves her now whether we like it or not," Yuta steps in, expression so fierce you shrink yourself, his voice authorative. You're not sure anyone could defy him even if they tried, goosebumps erupting along your skin.

"are you prepared to take care of the situation yourself? To betray your brother and harm his human mate? Or perhaps you'd like to hand her to Jongin with your own hands?" The fury in Yutas voice is unmissable, everyone standing as still as statues as he locks eyes with Doyoung. Your gasp from his statement isn't even heard.

How the fuck did this happen?

Doyoung swallows, lips turned downwards into a rueful scowl, backing away from Johnny and his elder. He sounds apologetic when he speaks, but you know it's for his sake and now yours.

"Of course not, I just think this is all a bit ridiculous. We haven't had trouble with Lampir's for years."

"Do they really make that weird screeching sound when you rip their heart out?" Mark quips at Johnny enthusiastically. You feel dizzy, steadying yourself against the bar, desperate to feel the cool marble against your hot skin. Everything is becoming too hard to comprehend.

"Hey hey, look at me." Johnny is by your side, examining you with featherlight touches. He pulls your gaze up by your chin, and you can't force yourself to give him reassurance with a smile, not even a glimmer.

"You h-had to...to kill it. Your shirt, it's all messed up." You stutter.

"Hell yeah he did, it was awesome - nasty too, fresh Lampir blood reeks." Jaehyun and Mark high five. You hear a faint, hushed 'Shut the fuck up!' from Jungwoo.

"Yes, I did kill it. It - well it wanted you. That's why it was there," he looks pained, walking you to a nearby booth and sitting you down, slipping in beside you. "Jongin is a true elder, he's over a thousand years old and Lampirs aren't like us. They're driven only by hunger and greed, they possess almost no humanity." He explains. Taeyong finds a seat across from you, taking over.

"You see, because of Jongins age, these creatures believe that he is their leader. They're feral, and we believe that he somehow got word of you...and Johnny. Someone must have seen you come over tonight and reported back to him that a human is being shared by a coven." You tremble against Johnny’s sturdy frame, Yuta moving in beside Taeyong.

"If you think we are selfish and vile, you've seen nothing yet, little bird," the eldest of the coven inquires. "If we are correct, he wanted that Lampir to take you to him. He probably even promised it would get to taste you, if the task was completed. He'll know one of his little soldiers were slaughtered, it won't be long now."

Your eyes are already wide and welling with panic, jaw slack. You're not sure what to do with the fresh wave of tension that forms an uncomfortable knot in your belly, Johnny's arms holding you steady as if it'll stop the tremors.

"W-what do you mean? Is he coming here?" You look to the vampire holding you and his sorrowful, agonized expression only confirms your fears. You just want to sleep.

"Yes. He is. We can...feel it." Gears start to shift in your head.

"And that thing earlier, all of you going silent like that...?" You question, lilt more aggressive than you intend for it to be. Jungwoo bounds over, and as always, smiles as if not a thing in the world could tear it from his bouyant face.

"We can communicate through our minds, because we've been together for so long. And since Jongin is an elder, it's like a premonition of sorts - but it's also kind of a given, considering you did rip out that things heart." He sighs at Johnny, and you rest your head against his shoulder, too tired and overwhelmed by tonight's turn of events to ask anymore questions, to deal with the flurry of feelings that are rippling through you.

"You don't have to worry, you are safe. We know how to handle the situation, alright?" Your eyes stay close, head nodding. "Just, one thing," his octave lowers and you can sense the importance of whatever he's about to tell you, looking up at him through tired eyes.

"If he speaks to you, and only if he speaks to you, call him Kai. He won't take too kindly to a human using his formal name." Your skin crawls further, not only at the situation but also at the fact that such a pompous prick is doing this to you, seemingly for nothing. Despite your disgruntled expression, you nod in affirmation.

"He's close." It's Doyoung, facing the door, slender body rigid. You stiffen in your seat and Johnny leans down to kiss the crown of your head, the only reason you're not having a full mental breakdown in the middle of such a situation.

"What should I do? Should we stand?" You whisper urgently, having no need to be so quiet but scared to raise your voice any louder, as if the vampire on his way may hear you and it'll entice him all the more. Johnny shakes his head.

"It's best to to remain neutral, casual. Even though he already knows we know he's coming." he remarks, worried eyes giving you a once over that has another round of questions at the tip of your tongue. Jaehyun snorts at this, following mark to the booth behind you both.

"Yeah, she does look like a treat doesn't she," he says it in a reflective sort of way rather than crass. This still doesn't help your nerves, or the sudden feeling of being naked. "If he doesn't already know she's involved with you, her scent will definitely give it away. She'd have his mouth watering from a mile away-"

A harsh smack lands to the back of Jaehyuns head and he winces in faux pain, rubbing his burning scalp. Jungwoo curses him, muttering something in that same language that you don't understand, what looks so be a scold.

Knock knock knock.

The sound has you cold, still in your seat while the door handle is twisted, from the other side, slowly and deliberately, as if to draw this uncomfortable moment out even longer.

"Not going to invite me in?" The voice is musical and chastising, feigning offense. The door is then pulled open and a figure waltzes through the threshold, elegant and poised with his hands behind his back. His clothing is the first thing you notice, ostentatious and regal, purposely.

"Pardon our lack of hospitality, we unfortunately had to kill one of your pets." Yuta stands, and leisurely strolls towards the bronze, man and you realize that Yuta must be the only one old enough to address him so informally. The others stay put.

"Hmm....what a pity, I must say. I see your plaything is here," His dark eyes flit towards you like a snake, and his gaze is something you can't avoid. It's not like the others, this time it's like a magnetized force, and your body feels as if it's been pumped with morphine, though you're still very much conscious and aware. "come, I'd like to get a good look at you."

"Please, don't do that." Johnny growls, and the beautiful man chuckles, a lively sound that matches his youthful exterior, the malice hidden underneath such a pleasant mask.

"She hasn't been tainted with your blood, I see. Her mind is still susceptible...how very intriguing." The vampire tilts his head curiously, tapping his foot impatiently. "must I ask again?" The tension is only adding to his fascination and he breaks eye contact to glance at Yuta, enough time for you to squeeze Johnny's hand and give him a reassured nod.

It won't do anyone any good to sit here and defy the man anyways, and you aren't as scared as you should be, as always. Whatever happens, happens. Though you're confident that it won't be without a fight from the six other vampires in the room. Maybe minus Doyoung.

Johnny looks even more agonized than before, reluctantly slipping from the booth, hand still in yours as he allows you to walk towards Jongin. Kai. Call him Kai. Only if he speaks to you. Your boyfriends word repeats like a mantra as the excitment rolls off of Kai in rivulets.

Once in front of him he stares at Johnny's hand in yours, and the touch is abruptly gone, arm swinging lonesome by your side. Kai is tall, and his energy is as captivating as it is terrifying, in many ways. Knowing he sent that creature than almost attacked you earlier...

The breath leaves your lungs as the vampires smooth, golden face appears in front of your face in just one blink of your eyes, before he moves it to the side of your neck - hovering his nose over your throat.

Your pulse is hammering but there's nothing you can do about it, even as he takes a deep and dramatic inhale before blowing cold air against your skin. He hums, a content sound.

"It's so strange...surely if you're associating yourself with seven vampires you'd be at least a little marked up," he stands to his full stature, supple hand reaching out as he extends his index finger and traces the apple of your cheek. You remain outwardly calm, steady.

"But you are just as perfect as a rose petal, aren't you? And you only smell of that tall one." The gears shift in his head and something in his irises flickers, as he glances towards Johnny, sending shivers down your spine. The whole room senses it, you can even tell and you aren't immortal. Kai's stare feels as though it might burn right through you, but Yuta's velvet voice distinguishes the burn.

"She's marked, they're just not visible. We haven't all had the chance to mark her yet, I'm sure you know how those bonds can take some time."

Your thundering heartbeat pauses for just a fraction of a second, the absolute unequivocal tone in his voice giving you whiplash. Kai's neat, dark eyebrows raise, in what seems to be genuine surprise. Yuta steps closer, as does Johnny. A presence walks behind you as well but you aren't sure who it is just yet.

"Marked...you say? So this human..." Jongin smirks devilishly and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, soothed quickly by Yuta's touch against your nape. The presence behind you is Doyoung, you're also able to conclude, as his melodic voice is the next to speak.

"Ours. The human is ours." His tone is so factual, so unequivocal that for a moment you wonder where these acting skills even came from. Not even five minutes ago he was giving you the stare of death, now he presses himself closer to your back, Johnny on your side opposite to Yuta.

Jongin tongues his cheek, utterly fascinated. Something falls over the energy in the room and it's oddly safe, the old vampires shoulders slumping only slightly, eyes still lit with animation.

"She must melt in your mouth, to be so fawned over by seven immortals. Hmm...if only you weren't claimed, this sure put a damper on things," He pouts like a child, one hand perched underneath his chin whole the other arm wraps around his torso. He takes a step back and examines you, licking his gums.

"I surely would have had my Lampir take you to me instead of ripping you apart for himself. What an unfortunate set of circumstances." For the first time, you're genuinely disturbed by a vampire, and Yutas hand soothingly massages your skin, ever so slightly. The movement probably wouldn't be perceptible to others, if it weren't for the fact that the room is filled with supernatural creatures.

"This means that the meaning for your visit has been concluded? Has it not?" Johnny asks, jaw clenched and teeth gritting together. You can tell this is winding him up, that the tips of his ears would be red right about now if possible.

Jongin sighs dramatically, placing his hands on his hips while he gives you all a once over, smiling wickedly to himself. "For now, I'll leave you be. This whole ordeal has gotten me so thirsty...I'll enjoy my variety for now. You all enjoy your little bunny," he extends his hand towards you, stroking your cheek one last time. "hope you're all at least giving her a break between turns."

Your skin burns hot and he giggles, twiddling his fingers in goodbye as he turns his back, expression neutral before he disappears from the room. The front door swings idly in the wake of his dash.

You let out a breath, finally able to think somewhat clearly as the blood returns to your limbs. Johnny's arm is around your waist at once and you're suddenly so used to Yuta's touch that it feels odd when he lets his hand drop, lingering for only a moment. You bury your face in Johnny's chest, relieved, as sketchy as Jongins behavior might have been.

"I need a drink." Jungwoo muses, and the statement brings you somewhat back to current reality, though you refuse to move from Johnny's arms. Your voice is muffled against him.

"Where are we?" You hadn't had the chance to think if it previously, too busy like, fearing for your life and all.

"This is our place, you're looking at bartender number three baby," Jaehyun boasts, and you're amused by the way he's so proud of it, Mark rolling his eyes. You look up at your boyfriend, incredulous.

"You guys...own a bar? Why didn't you tell me?" You're past the point of being angry, stupidly perhaps but after tonight you've realized that a lot of things stay hidden for good reason, as irked as it makes you. You're somewhat grateful that things are coming to light later than never.

"Yeah, we do. We own a few actually, they're not normal bars, of course. This ones Umbra, Yuta's." He looks a bit shameful, as if expecting you to be angry, or even sad. Deep down, maybe you should be, but in reality, you and Johnny have been so caught up in each other this past year, you understand how things have ended up this way.

"Can vampires even get drunk?" You ponder, and Taeyong shares a fleeting, humorous look with Doyoung, who smiles for the first time since you've met him. He looks like a completely different person, like that.

"Dude, yeah they can. It's kind of a vampire set back, imbedded in our DNA by whatever created us - after drinking a certain amount of blood we can get fuuuucked up." Mark explains with exaggerated hand motions, and you can feel Johnny sigh. You wish he weren't so abstinent about telling you all of this.

"It's a lot more than that." Taeyong cuts in, though your yawn has Johnny suddenly cupping your cheek, his tone gentle and soft. "Hey, there's a bed upstairs. Or, I can take you home, I understand if-" you yawn again, slumping yourself against him. Exhaustion is beginning to weigh you down.

"Shhh, I'm fine now. Wanna go upstairs." Your eyes are already closed and his large hands are quick to scoop you from the back of your knees, pulling you into his arms. You wrap yourself around his neck, breath against his throat.

"She's staying here tonight," one minute you're hearing the chatter of the rest of his brothers around you, and the next, silence is all you are able to perceive other than the low timbre of a pair of voices.

"listen I don't know if the house is secure, I wouldn't put it past Jongin to pull something. I don't want to leave her but-" Johnny sounds conflicted, the urgency in his voice perceptible even through the haze of the first stages of sleep.

"I'll watch over her. Jungwoo will be with me, Doyoung and the youngest can get everything repaired, there's enough of a mess to clean."

Your back meets plushness, so soft you're curling against it on instinct pleased to be met with a fluffy comforter, thick and warm.

"Listen I...I want to say thankyou, for what you've done. I'm only saying this because I could feel what you were feeling, and I know that it was genuine," you almost wonder if you're dreaming. You feel like you're eavesdropping on a conversation you're not supposed to hear, despite the fact that they're speaking in front of you.

"I'm not the most thrilled that the first human you've been even remotely generous towards, is the one I love or course. But I can tell she's safe, and comfortable with you. And that's what matters." There's a silence for a second.

"I can't pretend that I'm a changed creature over night, but I will say that she is somewhat pleasant to be around." You'd smile if you weren't already half asleep, faintly aware of the soft stroke to the back of your arm. Johnny.

"I could feel...her, too, you know. It's more than just seeing, she's not scared around you as I thought she would be," you wish you could the sleep that's consuming you, because this part of the weird dreamy haze has you a bit embarrassed, perplexed, even.

"Just keep her safe. Whatever she wants, that's what goes. I'm sure she has a lot of questions, and I'll be back in the morning to answer them."

This time, you're down for the count, a scene already beginning to unfold in your mind, the onset of a vibrant dream. Somewhere in the back of of your mind, your conscious tries to make sense of the picture, of what exactly it means.

Surely, your mind is playing tricks on you.

[deniigi]

Blame @petrichordiam for this.

-------------

Title: centerstage

Summary: An academic goes to a conference and is jazzed to see a jedi speak there. He unknowingly sits next to this jedi’s Support Squad.

The jedi Support Squad is like 85% clones, and 15% Jedi Generals.

No one mentions that the jedi speaking has never done this before and is petrified out of his blessed little mind.

*Anakin is like 19-20ish here.

-------------

Sion Jissard has spent the last ten years of his life in the dredges of archives, digging through documents and testing fibers found between the flimsy, papery pages of old texts—scrounging for clues to recreate the conditions of the great conference halls and small, tucked away offices in which some of the most powerful people in the galaxy once gathered to whisper and shout over the fate of whole planets.

He has a hypothesis that the conditions in those rooms affected the decisions made in them. His hypothesis is strong enough that it has endured several rounds of peer-review and escaped those vulture-like clutches mostly unscathed in published form—both in journal and, his chest swells to recall, in book formats.

His book has sold several hundred copies and been cited in a plethora of upcoming article submissions.

The last eight years of tension in his marriage has eased in light of this. The salary from the professorship obtained in light of the book certainly hasn’t hurt it either.

His two doctorates are set on the wall of his office and when he receives word that a conference on ‘Intergalactic Unionism and Peace Negotiation’ is to be held in two months time, he opens up the speakers list and raises his head to gaze upon those two solid frames.

There will be jedi speakers at the conference. Several, actually. The whole thing is to be held on Coruscant, in the small visitors’ wing of the Jedi temple itself.

Sion Jissard pinches the fabric of his suit and then lightly slaps at his cheek to make sure that he is not dreaming.

He has only recently begun studying the jedi order’s material world and the role that world plays in their intergalactic peace-making practices. Prior to this, he considered the subject too on-the-nose. Jedi studies are rampant. Everyone wants a piece of that pie—the allure of it being that the jedi themselves, scholars in their own rights, refuse to partake in examinations of their culture.

They are notoriously obstinate. Their grandmasters refuse to let outsiders into their archives. Their masters shut down any and all attempts to obtain interviews or transcripts or documents with empty expressions or gentle, pitying smiles. Their knights blink with confusion at personal and personal-adjacent questions, and the little ones, the apprentices, are shielded behind all of these people as though the elbow-padded questioners are threatening their precious little lives.

In short, the jedi are happy to listen but loathe to teach. If you are not one of their soldiers or one of their fellows, they will lie to your face and tell you that it is their religion to do so.

And yet here they are, offering up a scholar’s wetdream and even allowing a handful of their own to present on their areas of expertise.

Sion Jissard will pass up this opportunity only upon pain of death.

He applies for the conference as a participant, not a speaker, and is delighted to receive confirmation of his place within mere minutes.

He puts the date on his calendar and starts looking into transit to Coruscant for the event in two months time.

--

 Sion arrives on Coruscant, at the foot of the Jedi Temple itself, and stares up at it for so long that he begins to feel sick to the gills.

He fumbles for his confirmation at the little table set up in the interior courtyard behind a side-entrance door. He is distracted by the fact that the woman he is standing in front of is a Jedi. She is helped by two small children and holds a baby who is dead-set on unraveling the knots that decorate her thick waist band. Even the baby is dressed in double-collared cream-colored robes.

Sion has so many questions he wants to ask.

The jedi asks him for his name. She has a collection of name badges before her, but none of them are his. He gives his name and the master turns to the little girl sat at her right elbow with a brush in hand and instructs her to write it out.

The jedi child—not an apprentice, her robes are cream still, there are no additional earth-colors layered on top of it—writes Sion’s name in beautiful script on a little card and hands the card to the master, who puts it in a holder with a pin on it and places it into Sion’s hand.

She instructs him to go through the side door and enjoy some refreshments before the event begins. The baby in her lap looks up at her abruptly and bonks his sweet little head against her chin.

Sion forgets himself.

“How old?” he asks automatically, gesturing to the baby.

The master looks down into her lap.

“He is eight months and 75% lung,” she says affectionately.

“Ah. Mine was like that, too,” Sion says. “He grew out of it. He’s only 40% lung now.”

The master smiles.

Sion removes himself from her table before he embarrasses himself further.

--

 There are enough people inside the front room of the jedi’s visitor’s wing to nearly fill it to capacity. The volume, though everyone is whispering, is great enough to be heard from outside the door. The room itself is earth-colored with a high ceiling. Its walls all contain niches with rounded borders. Columns with deep-cut creases in them arch high to the skylights.

It is all beautifully geometric, stoic, and clean. And even though the walls and floor are built from materials of warm tones, the skylights overhead and the surrounding addtion of books and holorecords set into the walls lend it a cooling quality.

What should have been imposing architectural feels more like holy space. The room is one that reverberates with reminders to respect all around you.

Sion’s fingers yearn to document this, but there is a sign right by the room’s entrance that asks politely for no recordings or holographs to be taken.  

“Professor Jissard,” a familiar voice says.

Sion feels his whole body droop. He turns to see Teo Detras stood before him in his obnoxious, roaring red robes.

“I’m pleased that you too were able to secure an invitation, sir,” Teo says as though he has not attempted to place Sion on the metaphysical chopping block for each of his premises since the time they began their academic programs.

Sion opens his mouth to point out that this is also his area of study and that Teo has no monopoly on the field of Jedi architecture when a quiet passes over the room. Sion watches the heads around him lift and searches for the source of the sudden shudder of silence.

He finds it in a tall master with dark skin standing at the very front of the space. The man has tucked his hands neatly into the mouths of his sleeves.

He is Jedi Master and General Mace Windu. Sion has read and reread his essays, not caring so much for what he is talking about but how he is talking about it. His metaphors and examples should have been insight into the common experiences of those living in the Jedi temple.

Sion has found, however, that Jedi Master Mace Windu does not especially care for eloquence or metaphor. He cares only to methodically destroy the argument (if it could be called that) published by a jedi named Qui-Gon Jinn many years ago. Though Master Jinn has not published for several decades now, Master Windu’s writings remain agitated by his interpretations of the jedi’s Spiritual energy, the Force.

Just gazing upon the man now, Sion would not think him capable of agitation.

Master Windu welcomes the academics to the temple and says that he regrets not having more time to speak with each of the attendees as individuals, but there is a war on and his clone troopers require his services. He encourages people to refrain from any recordings of the temple due to its sacred nature, and he asks that attendees be mindful of the jedi Initiates (the white-robed children) who are confused and intrigued by all of the non-jedi people inhabiting their usual playroom.

He cautions everyone that if anyone slips on a toy, he warned them, and the temple is not liable for their medical bills.

This is a joke.

People are unsure of whether or not to laugh. Some laugh awkwardly far too late. Master Windu gives no sign on his face that he appreciates or disapproves of this.

Instead, he steps from his space of honor and leaves in his place a young man with feathery blonde hair and a highly expressive countenance, who drops his armload of documents on the floor obnoxiously and flings himself down to snatch up only the conference program, as if this was the most efficient way of finding it.

People know to laugh this time.

The young man begins announcing panel topics and rooms and give his strong opinions on each of them.

More people laugh. It feels less like a sin.

“And that’s all, my dears and darlings,” the young man says, “Mind your step into the conference rooms, our predecessors derived joy from an unexpected drop.”

--

 Sion has only one panel that he will kill at minimum three bodies to sit in on. It is the one on peace strategy and resource management. He is not here for the peace strategy or the resource management parts of the talk; his burning interest yearns instead in listening to how and if people talk about their space and things. He wants to write down the language they use. He wants to learn about the physicality of peace.

He thinks ‘The Physicality of Peace’ would make a very compelling title for another book.

So he slips through the arched doors of conference room 3 and finds himself in a tiered lecture theatre. There is a small balcony with rows of pew-like benches that hangs over a lower seating area. He takes a seat at the edge of the front pew and sets his datapad on his lap for note-taking. At the front of the room there is a long bench—not a quite table, but definitely a tall bench, and behind it, there is an enormous screen for displaying images and information. Someone has very kindly thought to place a jug of water and some cups at the center of the bench by a microphone.

Sion gets the impression from its awkward, dead-center placement that it is an addition that the jedi themselves usually forego.

He wonders what that means. He only wonders for about 15 seconds before a hand touches his shoulder and he jerks in alarm.

“My apologies, sir. We were just wondering if the space next to you is available?” says the smooth-faced, copper-haired man standing above him.

He is wearing white armor on top of his layered robes. The arms and legs that emerge from his long off-white tunic are dark in color, but his boots are hard and white and come up and over his kneecaps.

Sion is speechless.

This is General and Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi.

General and Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi has touched Sion’s shoulder and apologized to him.

He doesn’t have words. He can only make fish-mouthed motions and then point and nod.

General Kenobi accepts this with grace and stands up straight. He waves behind him to call his companions over to join him on the balcony’s edge.

They arrive as a pack.

Instead of coming around and staggering past Sion’s knees at the edge of the bench, General Kenobi climbs over its back and settles in. He then twists back over the row and holds his hands out; a Clone Trooper in full armor hands to him a strange bundle of woolen, brown robe. It produces legs and arms and then bright blue and white lekku once Kenobi has situated it next to him.

“Fooled ‘em,” the little Togruta that emerges from the cloth says brightly.

“Shh,” Kenobi says. “Cody, you next.”

“No, I want Rex to sit with me.”

“Ahsoka, shhh.”

“Rex.”

“Child, this is how people like me get banned from meetings; you’re not even supposed to see—”

“REX.”

“HUSH. Okay, okay. Rex. Pst. Cody, get Rex. Cody, oh for the love of—Wolffe, yes—no. Wolffe, look at me. Get Cody to get Rex.”

Sion cannot believe what he is seeing. General Kenobi appears to be sneaking half of his command into the balcony area. There are more than a few clone troopers there are at least twenty. They are somehow visibly excited despite their matching helmets. The General is able to tell them apart easily. He leans over the back of the bench again and crooks his finger at one of the troopers who leans forward. He tells them to throw something at their commander.

The Clone takes off his glove, stands, and nail a clone standing in the aisle in the head with it. The slap of contact makes this clone cease speaking in serious low tones with a clone decorated with blue edging in front of him. The first clone draws himself up perfectly straight and turns around with a fury that even Sion can feel the heat of.

His armor is painted yellow in places.

He holds the glove in his hand like a threat. The clone who threw it winces and points wordlessly to General Kenobi, then sits down in a hurry. Kenobi smiles wide and white. He has freckles on his face that do not appear on any of the images of him that appear on the news.

He’s also shorter than Sion himself, even sitting.

“Sir,” the white and yellow clone says stiffly.

“Rex,” Kenobi says through that threat of a smile. “Get over here.”

The Togruta child twists around excitedly as the clone in white and blue exits the conversation with the one in white and yellow and surveys the rows of his fellows piled into the space behind the General and the child. He has to squeeze past the line of knees and then climb over the bench to sit down next to the child, who immediately cuddles up to him.

“Hey, that’s my seat,” a new voice whispers.

Sion looks back to see General Quinlan Vos with his arms crossed over his chest, recognizable in any setting. Behind him is General Koon. General Kenobi slaps a hand to his forehead and grumbles, then shoos the blue edged clone and the child a few seats down.

The generals clamber just as awkwardly as the blue clone through the sea of knees of the troopers and then over the back of the bench.

Somehow, Sion has won the jackpot. He is now surrounded by jedi culture, literally.

“All of you, back,” Kenobi snaps down the bench when everyone is just starting to get comfortable. “Cody. Commander, come here.”

The clone trooper with the yellow edging does not want to play this game. He shifts his weight back onto his other heel as Kenobi pats the newly vacated space next to him. General Vos croons in a teasing tone something about Kenobi being especially fond of this clone.

Kenobi lurches out across the empty seat to punch him in the gut and then returns peacefully to patting the space over the sound of Vos’s moaning.

The Clone Commander has no choice. His general is giving him a directive. He gives in to the inevitable and makes his way through the knees and—much more neatly than the others—steps over the back of the bench to its seat and then into sitting. Kenobi beams at him, practically purring.

Sion needs desperately to take notes, but the subjects of said notes are right there and rudeness is intolerable in retaining his vantage point.

He fights the urge to vibrate in space as the lights begin to dim overhead and the panel chairman comes out to introduce the topic and speakers. It is only about a minute or so when a hand lands firmly on Kenobi’s right shoulder—the one by Sion’s arm. Sion jumps, but Kenobi resolutely stares directly down at the speaker.

“Obi-Wan,” Master Mace Windu’s low, low voice says right into the space between Kenobi and Sion’s ears, “Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”

Kenobi begins to melt but catches himself.

“You didn’t for a while,” he said.

“Get her out of here.”

“She has a right to see her Master.”

“What part of these orders are challenging for you?”

Kenobi still does not turn around to see Master Windu, but his eyebrows sink and his brow becomes more pronounced.

“No padawans,” Master Windu says. “Ahsoka. Out.”

The togruta, still bedecked in that heavy cloak, turns to stare owlishly at Master Windu while the person at the front of the room moves on to introducing the next speaker.

“But I’m not a padawan,” the child says. “I’m obnoxious. Master Kenobi said so.”

Kenobi holds his face in a hand.

“You can be both. Come,” Master Windu says, holding out a hand.

“But I’m a cloak,” Ahsoka tries instead.

Kenobi crumples further. Master Windu’s hand finds his shoulder again. Sion can feel its heat.

“If not her, then you,” he says.

“After,” Kenobi says.

“I’ll be waiting, Obi-Wan.”

Master Windu vanishes from behind them. Sion shudders. Kenobi turns to the side and hisses at Ahsoka,

“Now look what you’ve done.”

“You’re my co-conspirator,” Ahsoka hisses back. “My—my—Rex, what’s the word?”

Clone Commander Rex does not want to give her the word. Ahsoka tugs at him.

“Rex,” she insists.

“Enabler,” Commander Rex says with bitter regret coating his words.

Ahsoka beams over the laps of the other Generals at Kenobi. He glares back through a squint. He starts to say something, but General Vos tells him to shut up in a sharp tone.

Sion looks back to the front of the room and finds that a young man with dark hair has come out to the center of the front table-bench to speak.

He is a jedi. His robes, however, are dark in color. Blacks and browns with knee-high boots.

He’s very young. Very, very young.

And nervous.

Very, very nervous.

Even from the balcony seats, Sion can see his hands shaking. He is holding a stack of white paper. It is trembling like a branch on a windy day.

“Go, go, Master, go, go,” chants little Ahsoka.

Sion finds himself abruptly appalled by the realization that the child on center stage is the master of the child a few seats over from him.

General Koon gently shushes Ahsoka. Commander Rex helpfully wraps a gloved hand over the bottom half of her face to keep her distracted.

Sion looks from them to the young man and finds that he’s already knocked over the jug of water on the bench and looks about ready to sob about it. He gathers himself, though, and brings the microphone closer to him.

He is General Anakin Skywalker, Sion now understands. He is the first speaker and he’s never in his life presented a paper at a professional conference before.  

His voice shakes as he reads out the title of the article that he published (and that Sion has read) on battlefield surrender. After the second paragraph, Sion brings a hand to his lip to help him contain the emotions that come with the understanding that this boy is about to read his article, word for word, in front of a room full of academics.

He thinks now that he has been too harsh with his students.

--

 General Skywalker is not a strong public speaker. Clearly, his expertise is in action. He stammers. He loses his place in his reading and accidentally rereads three whole sentences. Only twice does he look up from his paper, and each time it is not at the audience but at Obi-Wan Kenobi, sat next to Sion, serious as a plague.

Kenobi nods sagely.

General Skywalker is General Kenobi’s apprentice. Was General Kenobi’s apprentice. However, it is clear to all who are present today that General Skywalker is still General Kenobi’s apprentice. Desperate, the poor thing is, for Kenobi’s reassurance.

His confidence in reading grows under his former (current?) master’s approving eye until he turns a page and—horror of horrors—drops the stack of paper.

Sion’s whole body tenses in sympathy and second-hand embarrassment. Skywalker flings himself down and messily collects the papers. He hurriedly reorders them, all while stuttering ‘ums’ and ‘uhs.’

Yet, when Sion chances a peek down the line of Generals next to him, he finds that not a single one has winced. No one has laughed. Even the clone troopers all around them are as silent and steady as the night itself.

It seems like they are all listening intently to their young General on center stage. The only giveaway that sympathy is being had by any is the tiny gesture Clone Commander Rex is making with his hand. He is moving it almost imperceptibly in a circle, as if to say ‘come on, come on.’

Sion looks back to young Skywalker and waits patiently as he finds his place and carries on reading again, this time faster. This time he does not look up for his master’s eye.

He wants only for the torture to end.

He gets to the end of his paper without dropping it or repeating himself and is flushed red. He does not ask for questions. He merely says quietly into the microphone, “Thank you.”

The panel chair waits a beat before walking over to Skywalker and asking the crowd for questions on his behalf. Skywalker becomes even more luminous. Sion cannot decide whether asking a question would be more or less stressful for this poor boy.

No one asks a question.

The panel chair then starts to ask for applause for Skywalker, but before he can even finish the sentence the whole balcony breaks into uproar.

General Kenobi hoots and whistles piercingly in Sion’s ear. General Vos claps and shouts what sounds like ‘You FUCKING did it, kid. You FUCKING did it. Hip-hip—”

“HUZZAH,” the Clone Troopers behind General Vos finish for him in perfect unity.

“Hip-hip—”

“HUZZAH.”

More applause and congratulations erupts after this.

General Skywalker slams his paper into his face and bursts into tears at the front of the room.

He bolts for a doorway that Sion hadn’t even noticed was right next to the bench. General Kenobi whacks at his Clone Commander’s shoulder, and Commander Cody wraps hands around his waist and hoists him up so that he’s standing on the guardrail at the edge of the balcony. He leaps from there to the lower level then goes jogging out the same doorway his former apprentice ran through.

After another moment or two, Commander Cody stands up and snaps at the whole collection of troopers in their language. Everyone shuts up and sits back down. Commander Rex gestures for Ahsoka to put up her hood and takes from General Vos a small datapad which he gives to the child—presumably for her to occupy herself with for the next hour and a half of papers. She takes it and immediately becomes absorbed in its lightly-glowing screen.

The balcony is once again on its best behavior.

Sion doesn’t bother with listening to any of the other papers. He feels no shame at all in beginning to furiously take notes on his last twenty-five minutes with the jedi.

--

 Upon leaving the conference room nearly two hours later, he finds himself swept up in the clone troopers’ swift and orderly exit from the space. They line up outside the hall in lines by regiment and they wait for their commanders and generals to arrive before marching back towards the visitors’ wing’s exit.

After two or three minutes, only two lines remain.

Clone Commander Rex and Clone Commander Cody stand perfectly at attention beside their lines of men. Clone Commander Rex has his jedi’s apprentice thrown over his shoulder; he has balanced her on one arm while she sleeps.

It’s very sweet. She obviously trusts the Clone Commander very much.

“Gentlemen.”

The clones snap to even tighter attention as General Mace Windu appears, walking briskly their way.

“You’re dismissed,” he says to them. “Commanders, you will remain. Obi-Wan and Anakin will join us shortly.”

“Sir,” both commanders say simultaneously.

There is a pause, and Sion sees that all of these people are now looking at him.

“Can we help you, sir?” General Windu asks.

Yes. And Sion will pay any amount of money to just know this one thing. This teeny, tiny detail.

“Sir?”

“Is that normal for you?” he blurts out.

The Clone Commanders stare. The general stares. The apprentice coughs lightly in her sleep.

“I regret to say that it is not only normal, but expected of these general and units,” General Windu says. “Please vacate this area.”

Right.

“Thank you,” Sion says.

He stiff-legs it back to the crowd of other academics and hunts down a liquid to soothe his parched throat.

  The new book’s title will not be ‘The Physicality of Peace.’ It will be ‘All is Fair in Love and War: The Jedi Order and Ideologies of Family, Part I.’

 --------------- Yeah, so anyways, Myth and I decided that Anakin is bad at public speaking and nothing anyone says can take this from me now, I’m invincible. (If you want this on Ao3 let me know).