#plot all over again... which i just don't have the mental energy for and i'm sorry for that

[ccrites]

Signal Lost

I've had something happen to me that's so incredible and that I could have never hoped, something so touching and so unbelievable that it made me rethink a whole lot of stuff: a wonderful reader on Ao3 started reading my long-form fic (101k words!!!) and commented basically every chapter after a certain point. And wow, I would have never thought something like this might happen.

And yeah, it is my first fic with plot in it, yeah I will never believe it to be perfect, but it's good enough. And receiving all those emails from Ao3 really was the highlight of my days over the course of which I saw said reader slowly go through all my favorite parts!

And so I wish to give it some spotlight here, while I'm finishing up my school year and work and whatever! I will post this here for now, but I will drop chapters every few days and make a Masterlist for it this weekend. (nvm I don't have the energy to do this any time soon lmao) I have too many loose ideas in my head so this is just to pass the time till the brain worms wiggle all in the same direction

So without further ado:

Link to AO3 here : Signal Lost - a John Price x reader fic

----- here's a blurb to pique your interest!

“I don’t think I’ve ever received a document as classified as this one. What am I supposed to do with it, Kate?” he says, dragging his thumb across the pile of papers, each file filled with more ink than the last.

“You asked for proof, there’s your proof,” Laswell says.

“You said you’ll bring someone competent, and who can help us, this doesn’t tell me shit.” He stares blankly at the screen, tired. She stares back.

“The Captain specifically asked to keep this under wraps.”

He rubs at his face, scratching at his beard. It’s getting long again.

“Who is he, anyway?”

“I can’t tell you that.”

He groans again, picking up the file on top. No photo, no name, no age, no height, weight, no nothing . And he thought Simon was secretive.

“What can you tell me?”

“It’s the closest we’ve ever gotten to him. Did things a particular way.”

He shifts through the papers. “And the discharge?”

“Left after the entire team got wiped out. Messy stuff.”

“That why he doesn’t show his face?” He bends forward, grabbing the cigar from the ashtray and bringing it to his lips.

“John.” Her voice carries a heavy warning.

“Just sayin’,” he says, biting around the cigar with one side of the mouth. “What kinda captain doesn’t go down with his men?”

“Got enough guilt as is. You’re lucky I convinced them.”

They both remain silent. They know the missions would be a slippery slope. One wrong move and a war is started. He puffs a cloud of smoke.

“Anything else?” John asks.

Kate looks to the side, her face illuminated by another screen. He can see her hesitate, her lips are pursed in a thin line as if she’s debating her options.

“You’ve worked together before.”

His face lights up. “Finally! Who?”

Her face immediately hardens back up. “Can’t tell, John, my hands are tied.” She sighs. “You were still a Lieutenant.”

Years ago then. He mentally catalogs everyone he’s ever worked with, but he knows that at that age, he was throwing himself at every available mission, wanting to make a name for himself. “So an old fart then? How’s that gonna help us?” If the guy was a Captain when he was still a Lieutenant, and he felt himself grow old, he can’t imagine who Laswell is bringing back from the dead.

Laswell’s face distorts, he knows he’s pushing her buttons, but he has to know.

“Not older than you John.”

His eyebrows raise. “Oh?”

---

or

returning to the military to hunt Makarov is hard enough, to do it with your past lover is even harder. a "friends to lovers to enemies to friends and back to lovers" story

---

Tags and other CW: will be posted for each chapter containing warnings for more hardcore stuff (i.e., torture and angst namely), but this is a fanfic, with smut, so if you want all the tags feel free to check the ao3 link bc there are a LOT and I am lazy to retype them all here

[zai-doodles]

I really appreciate how it seems everyone seems to have their own priorities when it comes to Fairy Tail redesigns tbh, like mine are "what if they were butch" half the time or "what if their outfit was more functional"

What's your take on Irene I'm curious? She's the latest woman I'm hitting with the butch beam but in general I haven't really seen people redesign her much despite her fucking ATROCIOUS outfit

Ok I was avoiding this ask oops

The easy part is my mentality with redesigns, I usually just go for what I personally find aesthetically pleasing while adding in visual storytelling with their personalities. Like all the dragon slayers having varying levels of draconic features for plot or lucys main fit being an equestrian horse riding uniform to allude to how she ran away from home.

Idk for me it's kind of rule of cool at times and just me messing around until I start thinking abt the plot and incorporating more and more ideas into the designs ig

Ok so I have gotten asks about my opinions on Irene and silver and all that so the tldr is that I don't actually remember a lot of the late ft stuff bc I genuinely just got bored and didn't like it.

I plan on rewatching a lot of this but FROM THE LITTLE I DO REMEMBER here r my thoughts:

From jump I think bringing back Irene or silver is a detriment to both erzas and grays character arcs. They happen at a point in the series where we were never even remotely interested in who their birth parents r and seemingly neither did either of them so to bring them up out of no where feels like shock value to me.

There's just very little emotional investment because again AT THIS POINT in the story both of them r suppose to have grown where they see the guild as their family regardless of blood ties. This is kinda emphasized/ addressed by having erza be like the only parent I recognize is my guild master but also then y make it her mom in the first place if it doesn't hold any emotional stakes??

Specifically Irene, I think making her related to dragons is cheap and weird, erza before this has never been hinted at to have any kind of connection to dragons so again we have this weird shock value nonsense feeling

Like ugh if u WANTED to make it work then at the very least they could have made Irene more mother gothel energy where she's actively trying to coax erza into loving her and playing the role of the loving doting mother only to turn out to have been evil the whole time or something to at least CHALLENGE erza emotionally since so much of her arc has been learning to let ppl in so having it back fire this late in the show would have been interesting to me.

I'm rewatching the Irene fight just for this and I'm so annoyed now omg let's talk abt it

Irene just taking over Wendy's body happened so fast and easy also u can't tell me that Irene has never heard of the other dragon slayers so what would it have changed to just make this her plan all along and that's y she wanted to get close to erza and gain her trust. Like give it an arc or something with the twist at the end that she was grooming wendyas her new body and make the ritual more involved that it needed some level of trust or willingness from Wendy which would in turn make erza feel awful for putting her trust in Irene at all

I'm spitballing idk but all this to say that having a main supporting characters parents come back from the dead to be a nothing villain that they defeat the same as everyone else is lame

I forgot this is the fight where erza destroys a meteor with one arm I'm not even going to touch on that theres just so much there.

Ok onto silver omg

I simply hate the switch of like, o it's grays dad wait no it's actually deliora wait no it's actually actually grays dad fr This time guys-

Like idk commit to something bc again, this whole fight is like 10 minutes so all this info is just thrown at gray with no time for him to process until his dad dies again like idk can we plz have some internal struggle that lasts more than a single fight

I don't hate giving gray some kind of closure to his family dying but he also literally never mourned or talked abt them before hand bc, to me, it was implied he didn't really grieve them and just jumped right to revenge and training with Ur and when she died her death kind of consumed him so he stopped thinking abt his parents?

Idk again, if u wanted to make it work, literally just throw in some guilt abt his parents deaths where gray feels like he could have protected them or something or even resenting his father for not being strong enough to protect them and thats y he always pushes himself to do better and is willing to sacrifice himself to save his family at every turn bc he wants to be a martyr so bad guys-

Idk these r my initial thoughts, ik u didn't ask abt silver but he and Irene go in the same box to me

[elf-osamu]

Hello!!! I hope you don't mind me requesting a comfort scenario with GN!reader and Gojo Satoru. The reader is touch starved and tired in general so Gojo soothes them to sleep <333

“I WISH YOU SWEET DREAMS”

[ masterlist ] [ reblogs are v v v appreciated ]

hurt/comfort (kind of), romantic relationship, satoru gojō x gn!reader

warning(s) : touch-starved!reader, trouble sleeping, sleep-deprived!reader, pre-established relationship

word count : 583 words

plot : “life can be stressful and exhausting - sometimes, people crave rest and affection”

a/n : I'M SO SORRY FOR WRITING THIS AFTER ALMOST A YEAR OMG, i've been so busy between mental health struggles and school. but i managed to write it ! this request was adorable to write, truly 😭<3 ngl satoru is one of my comfort characters and i love writing for him !!

tiredness seemed to be lingered over your body, like an invisible coat pressed with force on your shoulders, reluctant at the thought of disappearing too soon. it was a rather troublesome feeling, making everything more complicated than it already was — an unpleasant situation to find yourself in.

there wasn’t a specific reason for your behaviour (or was there? as of now, you were too restless to think about your feelings), it had been just an awful week and you hadn’t been able to sleep properly, if not at all. your whole body demanded a place to lie on, to finally rest peacefully without worries on your mind, but it seemed an unsurpassable task, something which required too much trouble and energy to be actually put into practice.

on top of that, your need for physical contact was becoming more and more persistent as the time passed; you craved the comforting sensation that was human warmth; you missed your boyfriend’s, satoru, presence and affection.

it had been a rough time for the both of you: your free hours didn’t align with his and viceversa, resulting in an unmet wish and a desert apartment. you tried to occupy your mind with everything you could think of when waves of loneliness hit you — you had to distract yourself from that constant feeling, otherwise you would have completely succumbed to despair.

however there you were, laying down on the bed with your face drowned in the comfort of your mattress.

as your thoughts got the best of you, you didn’t have the energy to do anything, but your restless mind kept you from feeling enough at ease to rest, even for a short time.

you were planning on another boring and sorrowful night, already visualizing all kinds of misfortunes that could happen from there to the following day, until you suddenly heard a familiar humming. it was low, but it brought a cheerful sound to your ears; hope was growing in your chest, the possibility that at first seemed unthinkable was now almost reality.

as you sensed his presence, you quietly said, almost in a whisper, “satoru?”.

footsteps echoed in the room, answering to your question.

“the one and only” he made himself known, leaving a kiss on the crown of your head.

after he changed into more comfortable clothes, satoru lay down next to you, hugging you to bring you closer to him. your muscles relaxed under his touch and so you hugged his waist, feeling finally comfortable after days.

“bad day?”, he asked softly, not wanting to upset you, and kissed your forehead.

you rested your head on his chest, “bad everything. i’m… so exhausted and i’ve missed you so much”.

he was able to calm your worries with his presence, which was comforting to you. despite being a powerful sorcerer and having to make incredibly hard decisions on a daily basis, he felt like he could show his vulnerable side to you. it wasn’t always like that, it took time to get to the point you two were now — and you both were fine with it.

he kissed your head again, “i missed you too” he whispered, hugging you more tightly. “do you wanna stay here like this?”

your nod was enough to reply to him.

you slowly closed your eyes, listening to his heartbeat and syncronizing your breath with his — and soon enough you fell asleep.

“goodnight, [name]” satoru murmured; he was glad he could make you feel safe.

[ do not copy, translate etc. | by @ elf-osamu ]

[bonesandthebees]

*clears throat*

Anyway…

Things I liked about this chapter in no particular order:

The flashback with Niki and Quackity

Quakcity warning Wilbur about the bandits indirectly, doubles as foreshadowing and a hint that he’s behind it (though let’s be honest, it was probably Schlatt’s idea)

Oh and you should have seen my face when I realised [“Hand him over!”] I swear puzzle pieces have never snapped into place faster in my brain. I literally went “OH FUCK QAUACKITY WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Niki might think that Wilbur is lying again but I don’t have the mental energy to think about that right now for obvious reasons.

I cannot stress enough how much I’m here for this.

The l’manburg backstory. I was trying to put it together and analyse which character’s would be narrative parallels only the realise that it was literal based off of actually canon pogtopia and c!Wilbur and c!Tommy. I love it. Also made me think of Niki when she does not get the throne.

Wilbur saving Tommy’s life (twice? Attempted at least). Nothing says bonding like life or death situations.

Also at first I thought it might be something meant to be part of it or a plan by Phil and then the foreshadowing hit me like a truck.

Put Quackity and Schlatt on the most likely to be executed list right now. Not because I think Wilbur is smart enough to figure it out but because the person who was trailing him might.

Also, I love the consistent pov and the way you write it, but I would pay actual money to know how everyone reacts. I want my sand duo angst of Phil sending his son away against his will only to learn that might have killed him. I want to watch them turn the country upside down. I want to see Quackity in shambles because he might have killed his friends and the man he loves (? Is it mutual?) I want to see Niki’ reaction. But alas, we get Tommy and Wilbur in a SITUATION. Instead.

I do fully believe people will come looking for them, but now I’m worried we will get a chapter of snowstorm in the wilderness first.

Again I better get a sand duo hug after this is done. I need Wilbur to know that his dad loves him.

Also, at first I was like, “I wonder why Jack isn’t here?” Then the guards started getting sliced and I was like “oh that!s why.” Nobody gets plot armour in here. Jack’s cranckyness just saved his life.

Also, Tomys copying the way Wilbur eats his food tells us he looks up to him and trust his judgement. Maybe he did something right with his paranoia expenation.

Also, the consequences for this are going to be so good whether Wilbur figures out it was Quackity or not.

Anyway, I’m going to bed now. So good night! And a good day to you!!! What a great chapter I did not see that coming at all but I love it.

P.s. AO3 is being mean and Wouldn’t let me comment “BEE, WHAT THE FUCK!” but that genuinely was my first reaction.

-🌲

lol thank you, a lot of the flashback bit regarding wilbur and niki changed from what it was originally planned to be. I don't know how it happened but I got really into the flow of the scene and I'm very happy with how it turned out

HA the puzzle pieces falling into place about the bandits right at that moment. just "what's going on- OH"

I'm very glad you picked up on the l'manberg story not only being c!crime but also the parallels it could hold to rose!niki

life or death situations are the best for bonding!

don't be so sure we're only staying in wilbur's POV this time around spruce :)

LMAO yeah literally while I was writing about them leaving the palace in the morning I was like "shit wait I can't have jack here but I need to come up with an explanation for why he's not here" and jack's morning crankiness came about. he would've been killed so quickly by those bandits and I don't want this story to lose The Manifold so soon

wilbur and tommy eating their lunch is like that meme of miles morales and peter b parker in the first spiderverse movie you know the one

[six-of-ravens]

aloha friends and people who left annoying incorrect opinions on my posts, raistlin is a waif he is the waifiest waif it doesn't matter if his twin is a brick shithouse you are WRONG I am kinda sorta back. maybe only for one tipsy night, but who knows. listen, I'm 1.5 ciders in and feeling Properly Tipsy as opposed to last night when I drank jack and cokes for the first time in a while and just felt nauseous, so I'm Thriving atm. ANYWAY.

i feel like i have cleared some cobwebs from my brain. kind of. mostly i redownloaded bc i have the irresistible urge to natter about my life. tbh i considered deleting tumblr for a while bc there are some things about this site (but also social media in general) that annoy the absolute shit out of me, and also i feel like I dedicated too much ~mental energy~ to this site in the past (not to sound like some new age crackpot) and I need to cut down on how much scrolling and getting mad about other people's incorrect opinions I do. However, there are a few beloved mutuals on here that I miss talking to and also tumblr is kinda Home, y'know?

anyway TLDR I'm back, kinda. might still delete the app during the day so I can focus on IRL shit instead of being a zillennial social media addict, so I apologize if I miss messages etc but. yeah. for the sake of my mental health I have to be better at self-policing. Also, no longer going to allow myself to use the For You tab, so sorry if I don't see your posts bc tumblr only served them there. I can't control it lmao. frankly the algorithm here just ain't good enough and I don't want to cry AGAIN bc a video of a naked woman jiggling her stomach with a caption about how much she hates herself and wants to lose weight came up on my feed. Frankly since this is tumblr I'm not sure if that's porn or self-harm, but either way, fuck off with that shit, man! I kinda hate my body too and I don't wanna see that!! I don't want that in my brain!! Hence why I quit and went to ig-only for a while. My IG is all pottery and miniatures and painting and European travel vlogs it's so PEACEFUL!

now onto the fun stuff, a list of things I consider interesting that happened in the past 3ish weeks:

have done a whole lot of reading lately: Homesick for Another World by Ottessa Moshfegh which is weird and off-putting by very worth reading, then a reread of the Unicorn series by Vicki Blum (always a delight) and finishing Princess Jellyfish (there's quite the plot twist in the last few books but overall it's a delightful series), then my hold for Please Kill Me: The Uncensored Oral History of Punk came up (extremely interesting and worthwhile read, especially after listening to the No Dogs in Space punk series, very sad ending though bc of course a lot of the punk musicians passed away young), and now I'm rereading The Mermaid's Secret and The Dragon Prince by Vicki Blum as a palate cleanser, and then hopefully I'll start the LoTR reread I've been meaning to do for a while. So yeah I read like 16 books in 3 weeks. this is the power of quitting social media.

Also I've kinda discovered that I'm just pretty... disenchanted with all book-fandoms online. it's just so...kinda annoying? nowadays? just the same old drama over and over and I don't caaaare lol. Read what you want, at whatever speed you want, idc, none of it matters. I read for funsies after work. Some people read 24/7 because being a book blogger is their career. Some people are 17 and still have the mental stamina to read a 500 page book in 2 days. Idgaf if you read Maas or Austen or Sanderson or whatever, there's no moral high ground (except maybe not giving Sanderson money bc WOW BYU is a shitty organization). Also I don't necessarily want other people's opinions on what I read or if a book I just bought has "mixed reviews" or whatever (unless the person is a mutual whose opinions I value lol). So I might start posting on the book blog again but just....not interact with booklr. Torn between the desire to communicate with others and the desire to keep my hobby all to myself and free from unnecessary judgement or bullshit.

Finally rearranged my bookshelves, by ~vibe or whatever~. Might post photos tomorrow but the living room is once again in a state of chaos since I started gardening today.

On that note, started my garden! planted some veggies, herbs, and a whole boatload of tomatoes in seedling trays (listen, MacKenzie seed were on sale 3/$5 today at the store and I'm weak for weird tomato variants and herbs. Still need to find rosemary and fennel though). Have more stuff to do, but I'm going to give the seedlings a couple weeks to get started and then maybe plant everything else Easter weekend. Last year was nice, garden-wise, but this year I really hope we don't get 30C weather in May. My allergies cannot handle it 😭

saw the Alien/Aliens double feature our cheap theatre put on and it was a DELIGHT

we also got a record snowstorm that weekend, which sucked bc it was the same week I'd had a random friday booked off (previously for traveling with my aunt, very glad that was cancelled now) so I basically did none of the other things I had planned.

also after said double feature, had to make my first 911 call. luckily I rot my brain with true crime All Day Every Day so I handled it like a pro 😤 (i am fine it was for another person, and uh, it turned out to not be so serious once the emergency people were able to get them to stop crying hysterically and realized this poor person was just intoxicated, underdressed for the weather, and a bit lost)

discovered the health foods store near my place has a bunch of funky herbal teas for like $5.50 a box so I've been going a little nuts there. I LOVE FENNEL TEA IT'S SO GOOD. ALSO LAVENDER MY BELOVED! they also have a bunch of local coffee blends, and I'm seriously considering getting a coffee bean grinder so I can try them

saw Lisa Frankenstein the week after the Alien double feature at that same theatre, it was fucking excellent I laughed my ass off, also at that theatre you can get your ticket and snacks and drink for the same price as a Cineplex ticket, it's excellent

finally watched Saltburn, which was great. love the Donna Tartt vibes. i watched it while somewhat drunk off Soju, which I think is how it's meant to be viewed.

also started a Ghibli rewatch, to justify not cancelling my Netflix just yet (I know I know, I should but I technically can afford it and it's my emotional support streamer you know? how else am I going to instantaneously watch Gilmore Girls on a bad day?) So far I have only watched Kiki's Delivery Service lol

Also, funny anecdote: last week I got my period and was VICIOUSLY craving alcohol. like I went to the store and bought the most bizarre range of random things (soju, honey jack, and mead...and then proceeded to drink them at my normal rate lmao). Realized afterwards this is a combination of my usual craving for sweet things + my very stressed coworker constantly joking about how we need to crack a bottle of something when this stressful project is finished. At the time however I thought my uterus was trying to make me an alcoholic.

Did my budgeting with my new rent and discovered that I'm actually fine, because I had DOUBLED A NUMBER SOMEHOW! and I basically had $150/month freed up. I'm so smart. I continue to procrastinate my income tax though (shhhh I have another month....)

Started writing a vague story about two women hiking to a portal to elfland, which is located near an abandoned train station. There are cultists called vampires living at said train station who are such a fucking delight to write (not real bloodsucking vampires tho, they are currently eating paella 🥘). It's fun and weird and I'm having a good time with it.

started listening to a podcast called No One Should Believe Me about cases involving Munchausens by Proxy, which is very interesting. the host has a sister with (alleged) MbP and genuinely wants to get her (and of course her kids) help, so it's actually a really good, compassionate take on an issue that's usually played for shock value. I have to listen to it slowly though bc it's Heavy

started knitting again! made 1 dishcloth and started a second. have decided I'm going to take these into work when I have a few done. If my boss won't buy us proper cloths then I'll pawn my knitting practice off on them lol

there is a lot of early road construction near my office since, aside from that random snowstorm, it's been a mild early spring. be glad you haven't had to listen to me rant about that lol

finally bucked up and got a duvet cover for my comforter that was lowkey falling apart at the seams. it's a good comforter aside from some light "my washer is evil" damage so I'm happy I can stuff it into a (less expensive) duvet cover instead of having to replace the whole thing

[astridspeckles]

Random thoughts and ramblings about the amazing film Nimona! Warning this is a huge tangent and does talk about spoilers for the movie and a bit of spoilers about the graphic novel (that I haven't read since my copy hasn't arrived yet) also I've tried to write this post like 3 times but it keeps breaking so oof.

Kudos to the creator ND Stevenson who I swear is a massive source of creativinies that I would absorb like a sponge if I had the energy to because everything they're apart of is something I feel like I'd adore if if I took the plunge. Also he identifies as enby transmasc (which, I am too, and I didn't realize how huge of a blow it was to realize that people like me exist). I really ought to look into She-ra and their other works at some point. Anyway, anyway, anyway - this is about Nimona!

I love that this obviously queer movie decided to be release during the later stage of June aka "Pride Month" because I feel like it gives people the chance to watch it with fresh eyes during July, which is Disabled Pride Month (I'm Australian so it isn't really a thing here as far as im aware sadly) which Ballister is such a fantastic and amazing character who is gay and disabled.

He is never portrayed as weak or lesser for his disability, I imagine for people that it'll actually be easy to forget that he is disabled as an amputee with how capable he's written. I feel like it might just go over peoples heads at some point because you never get to see stuff written so well unless if its poking you with it every few episodes or its extremely obvious at a glance. But with Ballister it 'just is who he is' and it moves on to focus on its plot like it has from the beginning.

And its never used as a plot set back or change the storybeat or anything of that sort of matter. Which is amazing. However it isn't just ignored either! He has a moment of weakness when he sees Ambroius again. He hesitates, he withdraws from reach out to him while looking at his arm (Oh, Nemesis!). It is still fresh and new and he's trying to handle it (you're doing great sweetie).

I'm not physically disabled (I do have a weak knee however) but a mentally disabled and experience fatigue constantly and I'm sure I'd have chronic pains if I didn't have a high pain tolerance. So while this sort of character isn't someone I can directly relate to it is someone I can connect with (Although I don't believe you need to be the same as something in order to connect/relate to it).

However I am at home a lot and I don't get exposed much to other people and that includes a lot of people with other cultures, beliefs, body types and disabilities. So being able to see people different than me on the screen is always awesome, and being able to connect with them is too. Which the Queen, Nimona and Ballister is fantastic for everyone and hopefully the Director will give the other sort of audience of this movie a time to think back and work through things.

But I haven't seen many disabled people in media, because I don't really have the energy to engage with much content for long. So I have a limited selection of characters who seem like fantastic representation - because while yes Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender is fantastic she has literal superpowers compared to the every day person so I love and praise how she's handled because everything she does is fantastic-

Seeing Ballister's strong and dedicated personality which still has that life to it made me instantly feel for him along side Hiccup from How to Train your Dragon (And before you ask - no, AstridSpeckles is not due to HTTYD, its inspired from Zelda actually!) And I just love how it was all written and displayed. In HTTYD it was to connect Toothless and Hiccup together in a beautiful narrative. Here they used his arm to make a beautiful narrative too - he uses it, constantly.

He fixes his arm with just one hand which is insane because its also his non dominant hand which wow thats amazing. And he doesn't shy away from using his arm for anything, he still touches people with it, still wields things with as much confidence as ever to do so. He reaches out to Nimona with it too in that scene. Also Ambroius reaches out to hold his hand in that scene too! So tenderly and without hesitation! Which if it was another case with other characters I reckon I'd be a little upset but you see how much they love eachother and how gentle and tactile and soft they are so it is just so beautiful to see here...

Also I don't really know where else to put this but since im on a tangent about Ballister ima just say it here. He is such a fantastic knight! He knew the moment his sword was handed to him that it was off. He knew it didnt feel right, the weight was wrong? Or it just felt off? He knows his sword. He knows his morals. He knows what he has to do to make things right. He never betrayed himself ever!

Also the eye sparkles change. At the start their diamonds, but Ballister's turns into squares as he gets more exposed to different views where Ambroius turns into a triangle as his views are being pulled (the director whispering in his hear, his own heart, and his love for Ballister).

Also he too is a fantastic knight! His life falling apart? Never lashes out. Never hurts those around him (Okay, cutting off an arm isn't a love language.) So yes that is a case where he did hurt someone but that is addressed in its own ways.

But he never hurts or lashes out at the people he's protecting. He could easily just take it out on them, stop caring, fall into a pit of despair at his own problems. But you actively see him dealing with this own issues and then instantly being a knight the next scene and he doesn't falter or fall.

He is also so strong and I love that he had these moments, would of liked some more though but he isn't a main character like Nimona and Ballister so I understand why he didn't.

Also back to Ballister for a moment because the moment he heard Nimona's not really handling the things she's carrying, that she was able to tell him about her most vulnerable, scary and intrusive thoughts after knowing him for so little, that his thoughts in an instant was to get her the hell out of there and go with her.

He would try to work things out with Ambroius I believe, but he saw the hurt of Nimona who he hasn't known that long over the love of his life and said this is my priority. That would be so hard for anyone to do, for example a parent knowing their child is queer and the other parent not accepting them - there are cases where the parents stay together because its too hard for them not too, and lose the kid or kick the kid out.

The fact Ballister in a heartbeat acted accordingly to keep this new precious person in his life to abandon (like they did to him) without hesitation is absolutely insane and I love it so much. Also that it wasn't a move out of malice or defiance. It could of easily of been written differently that they need to protect her and they have to leave right now. But no. He took action (he always takes actions!) and while he lingered on Ambroius, it wasnt hesitation. It wasn't to hurt Ambroius either. He put Nimona being at risk first.

So I've actually been aware of Nimona for a few years now. I've heard about its ups and downs and its eventually cancel to its amazing revival! But I was watching it as a passive observer, never interacting with it because I know I hyper-fixate, I didn't want too get invested and attached and because off the rollercoaster of it not coming to the big screen while being in the fandom at that time (im sorry you are all so much stronger than I am haha!)

However, it is alive and amazing! And I'm finally here in the fandom - I've finally watched it - I've finally decided to order the graphic novel like I planned to back during its first movie announcement so I can quote "Enjoy the movie and then read the book since the books are always better", so I can love both as much as I can, yknow?

From what I've discovered reading online here and there so far (and its likely that this is wrong so take this with a grain of salt since I haven't gotten my graphic novel yet) that apparently that the movie is leaps and bounds improved compared to the graphic novel (Note: Not better, improved.)

Improved origin stories, improved personalities, improved characterizations. So much of the voice actors provide life and inspiration to these characters bringing them to a level that the graphic novels didn't have the resource to do.

I also love how people also aren't going crazy (negatively) about the change of races to the characters - im so used to seeing discourse about this sort of thing but its so accepted here that it is so refreshing to see.

The graphic novel has a larger and looser timeline and I believe a darker story and not as much as a happy ending compared to the movie. I can't wait to read the graphic novel though it looks very interesting!

But the ending of the movie implies such a happier ending for everyone, since apparently I've seen that in the graphic novel Nimona visits Ballister while being shapeshifted as a nurse while he is in hospital and he caught on too late after she says goodbye and he never sees her again and is constantly reminded of her when she sees people with her hair colour and that is so bittersweet!

The fact we get her coming to him at the end with him going HOLY SHIT is because it is saying here that it doesn't end with that note. They are together still. And I really hope something more comes out after this because I need to see a bit more to know what is happening there.

I had written a lot more here but my post keeps breaking and doing ctrl+z is making me lose entire paragraphs and gifs I put in as text breakers so I'm gonna leave this here or maybe do another post when I end up reading the graphic novel, who knows. But yes. I love Nimona :D

[kalisbaby]

NON-BLACKS DON'T INTERACT

This is for the niggas. Strictly for the niggas.

The way I took a break from social media because everyone was annoying the hell outta me on it, only to watch YT videos and see y'all being dumb about NVee's race and her wearing box braids is truly the funniest L I could've given myself.

Oh! Also seeing y'all giggle gaggle over other Black women and girls wanting to be K-POP idols while also complaining about SE Asian idols cultural appropriation and disrespect of Black American culture, which was the literal blueprint for the fucking industry, but dont want or expect fellow Black women to have an interest in becoming an idol even if it's just a fantasy for...some reason or other...

Idk...like I'm not even gonna deny there are valid points and conversations to be made on both issues from varying perspectives but the way all y'all carrying on about it. Ion like det shit. Ion like det shit.

Also, I need y'all to stop using "one drop rule" in relation to half-Black people. That's not even how it was used. That fucking one drop bullshit was normally used for people who were generations removed from their singular Black ancestors. AND, most importantly, it was used to denigrate non-whiteness and deny the privileges that come with it to people who probably physically looked, presented, and identified as white.

And...there's so much to get into with the bullshittery that is "race" and the creation of it by white supremacy and colonization to determine who had rights and were worthy of their full humanity (or just humanity in general) that I literally have neither the energy nor the mental capacity to currently tackle. BUT I will say this: if you're Black and you're basically losing your whole fucking mind to argue against someone YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW Blackness... Oh, baby, you lost the plot! Cuz if you and eugenicists are basically having the same conversation from the same fucking side, you might wanna rethink some things.

I have more thoughts on all this shit (including the Black women/girls wanting to be idols shit) but, like I said, I'm tired. So here y'all have this while I go find my joy again.

And before y'all start, no, I am not caping for NVee cuz I'm a fan; I really am over these conversations about her, about Kamala's cop ass, even about Drake's annoying dumb ass. There better conversations to be had by people with more basic common sense than chronically online people with the mental depth of a thimble of water.

FD Signifier said it better than I ever could in this video (start at 19:34):

So yeah... bye!

And again...

NON-BLACKS DON'T INTERACT

[yuuana]

Music Monday #240: ATEEZ - NOT OKAY release: February 2024 genre: Kpop, Jpop, EDM cw: aggressive flashing, violence, brainwashing, jump scares

Okay, I know I said the last time I wrote one of these that I was going to give y'all a couple of weeks before dipping back into this well, but that was before I skipped another week. And based on me misremembering the exact release date (why did I think it was March 9th release? The world will never know). So here we are, with more ATEEZ, because I can't help myself. And ATINY have a bad habit of sleeping on ATEEZ's Japanese releases. And let's be honest here, as someone who came into Kpop through the Hallyu wave of the early 00s, I'm always going to have a soft spot for Japanese releases.

{{Full review, including spoilers, below the cut}}

With an artist like ATEEZ, even a title like NOT OKAY doesn't give a lot. Of course we weren't going to be okay by the end, but there were so many ways that could have manifested; ATEEZ have tackled a range of pop music genres and never missed, so trying to read the tea leaves was just not going to happen. And for a group that gets accused of being noisy, well, this isn't going to stand against that. Between those opening hits of synth and Wooyoung's first line, you know this is going to be something both the same and just a bit different from anything ATEEZ have shown us before. It's not even like it's a particularly fast beat, but the intensity starts strong and then gets even stronger through the build up to the first chorus without ever really letting off or backing down, even with the way the instrumentals ebb and flow in the back half of the track - the calmest they get is at the rap break in the middle, and neither Hongjoong nor Mingi are anything but aggressively full energy at that point. Appropriate for a song whose lyrical tension resides in the conflict between wanting to fight against oppression and wanting to give up, exhausted from fighting. In the end, NOT OKAY is both a reassurance that it's all right to feel not okay and an exhortation to keep fighting, even if you don't think you can. Between Wooyoung getting more feature lines than in the past and Mingi getting sung feature lines as well, in addition to their tight closing harmony, NOT OKAY is a feast and ATINY are once again being well fed.

And then there's the video. With those eerie synths in the backing track, is it any surprise, really, that the music video leans into several horror tropes? The mechanical trap, the brainwashing you can't escape, the opposing forces who both are and aren't there, the unseen watchers, the psychological break, the jump scares. The flashing is equally aggressive, even in the non-narrative portions, making this a bad match for anyone with photosensitive migraine, but if that isn't you and you enjoy a dash of psychological horror with your EDM, this is the sort of video a person can watch a dozen times and still be pulling new insights out of it. I say as someone who has watched it at least 15 times now and is still pulling more details out of it.

Japanese releases tend to be a bit all over the place in terms of their place in the larger ATEEZ lore, not least of which because said singles are often also released in conjunction with another property (such as Let's Get Together for mimicus and Like That for Lookism). On the other hand, the way NOT OKAY's start mimics IT's You's dance opening, plus the title card defining "trauma" and that being the bright glowing sign we see first for the IT's You MV, connecting the two feels a bit like low hanging fruit. Which shifts the scenes that could, if we were to say they were definitely not lore, be read as simply metaphors for mental illness, into the potential of being at least somewhat literal. Or at least a mix of things literally happening to this A-cluster team and metaphorical and/or virtual happenings. After all, from MATZ, we already have the plot thread that the A streams and Z streams are crossing, to the detriment of the A 'verse team(s). Hongjoong and Seonghwa have already been kidnapped once, so what's a little more horror and torture, right? San running from attackers who both are and aren't there ... is he running from his own demons or are the lines between the parallel universes blurring? Were they captured and subsequently broken free or is it all happening inside their heads? Maybe it's too soon to say, but the final scene of all eight together standing firm against an attacking wave is both a positive final image and reason to think the story continues through them.

As a digital single, NOT OKAY (and it's c/w Days) is available now on all the usual streaming services. The guys have been in Japan for the last week-ish doing appearances and promotions, though most of them are not accessible to non-Japanese fans. Just makes me that much more curious to see where/when/how this will fit into future concerts. ;)

Want to see Music Monday deep dives more often? Sponsor a song selection! For the low, low price of one (1) KoFi, I'll write up the song of your choice. ANY song of your choice. Yes, even that one that's been played to death. Yes, your obscure faves too. With sponsors, I can stop skipping weeks and falling further and further behind in the releases! Sponsor a current CB for the next open Music Monday slot or sponsor a throwback for a Thursday feature! But seriously, if you've been enjoying my selections and analyses, we (me and the foster kittens) would love a KoFi in thanks. DW | Twitter | Mastodon | Bluesky | Ko-fi | Patreon | Discord | Twitch

[ailelie]

So, Legend of the Five is not a good movie. The plot is largely nonsensical, the promise of the premise is never fulfilled, and the character arcs are weak.

BUT!

There are three characters: Javier, Caitlyn, and Owen.

At the start, Javier and Caitlyn are dating. Then, Caitlyn begins to develop interest in Owen who returns that interest, but is largely baffled by it. Javier's response to this is hugging and holding onto Owen who, again, is visibly baffled. Owen gets close to Kaylee (looking at the same book)? Javier literally pushes them apart so he can sit between them. And another character notes how Javier's and Owen's elements (air and water) always go together. At one point, Caitlyn has to save the others. She saves Javier first and then Owen.

So, like, OT3.

(Note: Zoe has a crush on Javier. She does rest her head on his shoulder once, but otherwise does nothing. Instead, Zoe is more often paired with Kaylee. The movie ends with Javier, Caitlyn, and Owen all alone and walking through the school. Javier and Caitlyn's former friends scoff at them. Javier trades a smile with Caitlyn and then Caitlyn trades a smile with Owen. Meanwhile, Zoe and Kaylee have lunch together. At the end of the movie, Owen is shown with a conspiracy board. He whispers their names and touches a photo of Javier. Like. I don't think I'm reaching that hard here).

(Note the Second: The movie does suck. Seriously, the show says they all have powers, but Zoe is the only one who gets to really use hers. Caitlyn has fire powers, but she only uses them to snap the others out of mental/emotional darkness. Kaylee, we learn at the end of the movie, can read anything, which is why she was the only one able to interpret the symbols throughout. The movie mentions phoenixes, leviathans, etc, but then shows none of them. Javier and Owen never use their powers.

The story is about a magical tree that must be protected from a sorcerer. If she reaches the tree, the world will end. I wanted this to be based on a book, because I hoped it was just a really bad adaptation because nothing else explained some of the weird and pointless elements, like the weaver and unweaver. The weaver creates the forest. The unweaver eats it. They're in love.

A tree guy they meet at the start tells them they must show the beast who they really are if they wish to escape it. This never happens until the very end when Zoe throws earth energy at it. But even then she's doing it for a different reason.)

(Note the Third: What this movie should have done:

More time to establish each character's baseline.

Once they get transported, a chance for each to discover some aspect of their new powers.

Actually deciding to do the whole save the world quest instead of going home.

Actually getting tempted to choose home over saving the world.

Clearer stakes about why the sorcerer is bad and why the tree must be protected.

A better backstory that doesn't make the sorcerer sound like the good guy who got screwed over and is now only evil because she was betrayed.

Clearer gates and a chance for each of them to use their powers to overcome the obstacles they face. That way it doesn't feel like earth powers are the only powers that matter.

Clearer threats. Why did they ever worry about the various little people? And, after those little people (elves in the shoemaker sense, maybe?) were tasked by the sorcerer to guide the kids through the forest, why didn't they do anything?

Better backstory so that when the sorcerer reveals how she manipulated their lives to bring them to Australia it actually lands a hit rather than just being yet another bit of nonsense.

Anyway. Always irritated when something could have so easily just been better.)

[sk3tch404]

So I took a look at some of Mosq boys character files again, apparently he's half Christian. Don't ask me what that means, cuz I also forgor 🤠 but yeah, i think we pulled that out of our asses to justify the crosses in his design lmao

Now about Hyena boy... I- listen, listen trust me when I say, no tf u don't wanna get to him, he's like, the trashiest scumbag in existence 😬 like I'm not gonna lie, I think his only redeemable quality is his looks, so here's his part of the "prolly not a yandere" essay + my friends notes on him. Also I think in his hypothetical bad ending you also become a drug addict (because of him) and he accidentally causes you to OD, due to him being careless and giving you wrong amount :,)

Hyena

Bitch gets "cucked" every other day is it really cucking if none of them were in an actual relationship with him? u honestly think he has any sort of power over u? He barely scrapes enough money together to buy himself a fake gf for like 4 hours and then goes to his shoddy home to eat rotten food, u really think he can take u on?? Male hyenas in nature r basically punching bags, the highest ranked male is still lower in the hierarchy than the lowest ranked female

From my friend:

only connections to hyena that I have rn, is that he's buddies with tiger, and bunny probably doesnt like him

hyena boy looks like he sleeps in a fucking dirty alley way

- actually a pretty face

- trashy

- lives in a shitty apartment

- eats expired stuff, the whole fucking fridge is expired

- smoker

- smells like cigarettes

- takes drugs

- gets money from "sugar mommies n sugar daddies" that basically "own" him. gets money by illegall prostitution n pathetically begging em for money.

- throws out money to rental girlfriend

- constantly cucked

https://imgur.com/a/ENWBOX7

Also the game is not even in development, since theres still quite a few characters who don't even have a concrete appearance/personality and it would be wayyyy to much effort to complete it properly for now, since both of us are busy with school 😔 rn we just have the roughest of the rough plot outlines for their respective "routes"

-Ren'py anon

AWWW HE IS A LOSER CUTIE!!!

Dw abt the crosses on Mr. Mosq vampire boy. Tbh it's been pretty normalized as casual jewelry. Though I'm not gonna get into any real discourse abt it bc 💀

Anyway, I LOVE THAT EVERY BOY IS CENTERED AROUND DIFFERENT ANIMALS! SO SO SOOOOO CUTE HAHAHAHHEHEHE

I saw this video on male hyena's two or three years ago and omg I love this concept for him! Male hyena's are so miserable. They're awesome character traits though! He's not super friendly, kind of creepy ig, has substance abuse issues, scrappy, and a loserrrr.

It would be so awesome to see how the impact of his hyena background influenced his view on other animals/people. Especially females. I would imagine that he would hate most/certain kinds of women because of how female hyena's have treated him in the past. (Not saying misogynistic manners are all quirky n shit, just saying that it would be really realistic and a cool touch to his character)

God, he is really pitiful though. Hyena has to rely on wealthier people that most likely exploit him, desperately does prost1tuation, and then goes on to use that money to try to comfort himself through harmful means. Drugs, and temporary partners that he 'cucks' to release stress/distract himself.

AKA the only forms of safety to him.

The fact that he's used to eating rotten food and living in terrible conditions is also depressing. He's also most likely malnourished. The drugs don't help, and his constant run for money is probably costing him so much mental and physical energy.

Mans is bursting at the seams.

At this point, yalls characters are more like, "We want to make them yandere but they're too sad and weak to even have the time to be obsessed with anything other than their own lives tbh."

Which is even better 😍

Tiger sounds like someone who shows up at Hyena's door at asks if he wants to smoke out some rad meth they just bought off the corner on Buck street.

Or maybe they're really nice and come over to take better care of Hyena idk lolz

It's totally fine if yall aren't even in the dev stage! I was just curious hehe. I love the ocs so much already, and your friend is so talented! I really likeeeeeee that sort of style. Everything I ever wanted when I was 10 lol (That means I wanted to draw super cute and anime kawaii, not that it looks like a children's drawing lol)

Bunny sounds like a prude 🙄 /j

No but fr, I would be weary around Hyena too. He may be sad, but how his life is and all those drugs influencing him, I wouldn't want to get off the wrong foot with him either.

Last thing I wanna mention, I really enjoy that sort of ending. It really ties in with Hyena's character and is super realistic. Maybe Y/n is a rental partner and he's all like, "You wanna hit this? Idk I'm bored and ur like, average so..."

Simple, but effective and entertaining :D

Alexa, play Liquid Smooth by Mitski.

[mybrainproblems]

Do you ever think about continuing ALYNA? Especially with AoT ending? ALYNA really was a brilliantly well thought out piece of writing. I still reread it every now and again. Thank you for sharing it with us. Hope all is well with you!

Oh nonnie, this is actually such a lovely ask to get.

I will be honest and say that every so often I do think about ALYNA but the story is dead by virtue of a series of extremely unfortunate events; mental health issues, work issues, people being unpleasant in my inbox, the notebook with all of my plot notes sustaining heavy water damage (mostly the latter)... I think at some point I must have thrown out that notebook since I didn't find it when I was moving a few months ago (and I did actively look for it). Enough time had already passed by the time my notes got destroyed that I didn't remember a lot of the final arc which was like. The "tie everything up" arc (-_-;) so there are some vague bits that I remember but I don't have the motivation to try and remember or think up a "new" way to wrap it all up. However I do remember exactly what the epilogue was and where everyone ended up. I feel like saying that and not sharing it is kinda cruel but there is this tiny tiny part of me that always thinks that someday I will finish it and I don't want to spoil the plot... that I will likely never write. Sorry about that, nonnie.

It's funny bc I only know aot ended since I followed one last final blogger who was still into it but also I stopped reading the manga in fall 2015 and have no interest in engaging with it again. From what I understand it took some ideological Turns that sounded really unpleasant.

And super seriously while I don't want to engage with the fandom this was a nice message to get and I appreciate it a lot. Pretty much the only asks about ALYNA that I've been getting for literal years are berating me for not finishing it and somehow performing a bait and switch for discontinuing before I got to the ereri of it all by readers who went into it knowing it was incomplete. So yeah. This was such a nice ask to get like I never think about the fact that ppl might continue to reread it bc why would anyone want to read or reread a discontinued fic? So nonnie, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for sending this and being kind.

(And I'm doing well, I hope you are too.)

[sokkastyles]

I've written before about Aang's trouble with understanding the reality of violence, and one thing I'm thinking about is that he never really learns to take Katara's healing seriously as a result.

In the episode where Aang accidentally burns Katara, Aang feels incredibly guilty, and he is confronted with his own recklessness and the danger of firebending. He feels so guilty that he decides never to firebend again. At the same time, Katara discovers that she can use waterbending to heal, an ability previously unknown to the group.

The episode presents an important lesson about personal responsibility and consequences, but the problem is that due to Katara's healing, the focus shifts from Aang having hurt Katara to Aang's pain over hurting Katara. Katara then has to comfort Aang over her own hurt, and Aang's feelings take precedence as a major plot point as Aang has to spend a large part of the series overcoming his mental block over firebending, since he is the Avatar and must firebend eventually. The episode ends with Katara healing Aang's singed arm after his battle with Zhao, further positioning Katara as the healer of both Aang's physical and emotional wounds and the carrier of his burdens.

Katara later uses the spirit water to save Aang's life, but because Aang is not forced to deal with the consequences of violence on his own, because Katara is always there to carry that burden for him, he is dismissive towards Katara's healing abilities in the series finale.

Aang: [to Zuko] So, have you ever redirected lightning before?

Zuko: Once, against my father.

Aang: What did it feel like?

Zuko: Exhilarating ... [Flashes back to the moment for a few seconds.] but terrifying. You feel so powerful holding that much energy in your body, but you know if you make the wrong move, it's over.

Aang: [Chuckles.] Well, not over over. I mean there's always Katara and a little Spirit Water action, [Turns to Katara.] am I right?

Katara: Actually, I used it all up after Azula shot you.

Zuko: You'll have to take the Fire Lord's life before he takes yours.

Aang: Yeah, I'll just do that.

This conversation is there to remind the audience that Katara's resurrection of Aang was a one-time deal and to highten the stakes of the finale, but it also tells us a lot about the characters involved, specifically about Aang and Zuko's views on violence.

I've seen a lot of people try to paint Zuko as violent in relation to this conflict of interest with pacifist Aang, which extends from "The Southern Raiders" to the finale, but it really began as early in book one. Aang jokes about using the spirit water because the plot never really forced him to face the ramifications of being without it. And, despite Aang's growth in learning firebending and learning not to fear fire any longer, which also goes with learning to use it responsibly, his discussion with Zuko about lightning bending reveals that he still sees things as not as serious as they are. He asks Zuko what lightning bending feels like, because he's interested in the experience. He doesn't seem to process what Zuko says about who he bent lightning against, doesn't react with shock to hear that Zuko's own father shot lightning at him, but treats it as a kind of game. Zuko's response was that it was exhilarating, but also terrifying, and that the consequences for failure are death. Aang then brushes this off. Katara tells him that there is no more spirit water, and Zuko again emphasizes to Aang how serious the situation is and says that Aang needs to kill Ozai. Aang again brushes Zuko off.

Now, while I also don't think that killing Ozai would or should have been the only way, my point here is that there should have been some acknowledgement here that Aang's stance on this is naive. He does not take the situation seriously and is dismissive of what his friends say. And while Zuko does advocate for violence against his father, he also knows the consequences of failure. Zuko had to redirect lightning from his father, and had to face violence from his father before that.

Zuko's relationship with the spirit water and Katara's healing is also different. Zuko is offered healing from Katara, and accepts it, but is interrupted. Before that, Zuko told Katara that he had come to accept his scar. The context makes it clear that although Zuko wants to be healed, he knows that he doesn't need it. His wound is a scar, and has long since healed, although that doesn't mean that he doesn't still carry around that hurt. But he ultimately doesn't need Katara to take it from him, and her doing so would have diminished his ability to make the right decision for himself.

When Katara heals Aang in the same episode she offers it to Zuko, it is a life or death situation, and was the result of Aang's botched attempt to follow Guru Pathik's advice. I've written before about how this moment is one I felt had a lot of missed opportunity, as the conflict for Aang is glossed over in favor of Katara once again taking up the role of Aang's caretaker.

Katara ends up saving both Aang's and Zuko's lives, but her healing of Zuko at the end of the series is so much more meaningful because Zuko knows the consequences of his actions, he knows he might not come out of the fight alive, and he doesn't take Katara's presence there for granted. I've seen some people say that Zuko chose Katara to go with him to fight Azula because of her healing powers. And although that is certainly true from a plot perspective, I don't think Zuko was thinking about her healing him if that possibility were to come up. The conversation I quoted above shows that both Zuko and Katara are aware of the finality of what they are facing. I think he chose her for her combative skill. I also think he chose her because they are alike in this way, having made the journey together in "The Southern Raiders." Not because of their shared "darkness" or propensity for violence, as some people might say, but because both of them have faced violence, knew the consequences, and had to make hard choices without themselves being corrupted. Katara chose not to harm Yon Rha just as Zuko chooses to defeat his sister while trying to cause as little damage as possible.

I love that Zuko and Katara's relationship has this emphasis on personal responsibility, and both of them end on an equal playing field, saving one another's lives when neither was guaranteed. Both of them end up doing the impossible to save the other, Zuko redirecting lightning with an improper stance and Katara healing him even without the spirit water. The term "deus ex machina" gets thrown around a lot, usually in a negative way, but here we have two examples of how a problem can be solved by a seemingly impossible occurrence while making it seem believable and also serving the narrative and character's arcs. In contrast, Aang refusing to face the reality of his situation and getting the ability to defeat Ozai from the lion turtle seems like a cop out because he never has to learn the lesson the show seemed to be setting him up to learn.

[shinichirosbabymama]

Yuuta Okkotsu relationship headcanons

A/N: Okay so I started writing these with no real intention or direction so you're gonna have to excuse the fact they're basically word vomit 🤠 I'm in deep Yuuta brainrot right now so please enjoy the below as my coping mechanism.

Implied NSFW but nothing explicit. Both reader and Yuuta are aged up. Minor spoilers for the JJK manga (the plot isn't referenced at all but it does mention some of Yuuta's techniques so if you're strict about avoiding any spoilers please don't read it). I've placed the headcanons under a read more just to avoid spoiling anyone. Enjoy ❤❤❤

Based on purely my own observations and opinions, I think Yuuta is drawn to powerful people so it would not surprise me if he was interested in another sorcerer.

Being a sorcerer is pretty cool on the surface but a lot of the time it's pretty horrible too. You're constantly surrounded by fear, death, injuries, and the overwhelming negative energy from the cursed spirits.

It requires a lot of mental resilience which you've had to build up over years of training. As a result you've hardened emotionally, its hard to build relationships with others and you could do without the complication.

Yuuta comes crashing into your life with his special grade curse and nervous energy and throws everything off kilter.

He's so transparent. Where you tend to mask your feelings to save yourself any potential heartache, he wears his heart on his sleeve. Its both refreshing and infectious despite the fact you try to hide the way your heart stutters when he smiles at you.

I feel like this relationship would be years in the making. You're in denial for so long, trying to convince yourself that you don't feel anything for him, that you're simply reacting to someone in your life who is nice for once.

Plus Rika fucking terrifies you. You and Yuuta begin to interact more once Rika's cursed is lifted and you find the feeling even harder to fight.

You throw yourself into your training, surpassing most of the other students - although you're constantly reminded that he's still stronger than you. You thought you'd be jealous but instead you find yourself feeling proud of him.

That doesn't the two of you having healthy competition. You spar frequently and 9/10 Yuuta folds your ass but you don't mind so much when you get to watch him hover over you, his eyebrows pulled together with worry as he offers you his hand. He's so handsome it's painful.

Gojo starts sending Yuuta overseas on different missions (the bastard) so what was a simmering tension between the two of you turns into full blown pining.

Gojo (again, the bastard) senses something isn't right with you and he requests that you fly out to support Yuuta on a mission.

You're happy that you're going to be able to see him again but you're also apprehensive. You know you can't carry on in your current state - you need to tell him how you feel and this mission seems like the perfect opportunity to do that.

You throw up the whole time on the flight there and blame it on turbulence (bullshit).

When he meets you at the airport he pulls you into a tight hug and you hesitate with your face pressed into his neck for a moment, willing your face to stop burning quickly. He smells like soap and detergent and it's comforting.

Luckily he's blushing too and he scratches the back of his neck and apologises for hugging you like that. "I've been alone for so long...and I really missed you!"

You need to talk to talk to him but first things first you need to take out this special grade cursed spirit.

Easy peasy right? Should be no match for you and Yuuta. Except it is and everything goes horribly wrong and you nearly fucking die.

Yuuta very conveniently masters his reversed curse technique at the time and saves your life. You never forget the look on his face when you wake up and gasp for air. The poor boy is traumatised but he cups your cheek when he sees that your conscious again like he needs to feel that you're real.

During the flight over there, you'd thought of all the things you wanted to say to him. You were going to be brave, sit there, explain your feelings and brace for rejection.

Except that didn't happen. You woke up, looked at the pain in his eyes, and smashed your lips against his. It's messy and awkward. Yuuta is confused as fuck for about three seconds but then he kisses you back and its desperate and hungry as years of denying your feelings for each other finally boils over.

You leave the hell hole that you both nearly died in but the kisses don't stop after that. Yuuta's pining is as evident as your own and it sets your soul on fire. The two of you don't leave your hotel room for two days as you make up for lost time.

After that it's time for a serious discussion. The idea of being together whilst risking your lives constantly terrified you both but you knew deep down you were going to love him whether you were with him or not so you may as well enjoy each other while you were still here.

There were some ground rules though. The main one being that you could not go on missions together. Whilst it was tempting to be a very effective double act, you knew it would severely impair your judgement during a fight.

It sounds strange but you both basically agreed that if you died, you died. Neither of you wanted to die with any regrets and this was the only way to ensure that.

It was hard being away from him after that. You tried hiding your relationship from Gojo as long as possible but he soon caught on. He teased you both incessantly but on the upside he stopped sending Yuuta away so much.

From then on you take each day as it comes, silently looking forward to the day you can both retire.

Once you're graduated you move into an apartment together, a safe space for you both.

It's hard being away for him but he makes it all worth it when he comes home, brushing off the likely very dangerous situations he's been in to rest his hands on your hips and plant kisses on the back of your neck as you try to cook a meal for you both.

You call him a menace and he gives you that same breathtaking smile that used to plague your thoughts all those years ago.

He rests his forehead on your shoulder and sighs but it's a happy one. It feels good to decompress.

"I missed you. How did I get so lucky?"

"I missed you too. Good thing I kissed you that day hm?"

"Mhm. My turn now." He replies and turns you around so that he can kiss you properly. It's soft and tender and very much him.

You know this might be the last time. That anything could happen. But if it did - you had no regrets.

[samplingmoonsters]

Hi any updates on your break? I'm so sorry i don't want to nag you take all the time in the world. It's just checking ao3 everyday for over three months started giving me mental damage.

Your writting style is so immersive and your plots are divine i have reread punch him it's how man say hello twice the day i discovered it. Every update from you makes my day. You are an excellent writer.

You write the exact kind of debauchery I'm after. Finding somone who produces content that feels like it caters specifically to me is a treasure.

I want to sing your praises but also don't want anybody finding out i read anything of yours cus i think i would never be able to be seen in public ever again.

I don't know if sending this to you is a good idea but i just inhaled a shit ton of dust so my thinking may be impaired but anyway

I love everything you do. Your work drives me mad. I am insane. I am deranged. Please never stop. I hope you are enjoying your break!

Hello~ thank you for your kind words, really! When I first read your message I honestly didn't know what to write because your words really touched me deeply and I didn't want to answer with a half-assed reply.. I have been looking at it for the past two days and I think I have found all my words (hopefully).

First of all, to answer your question: the next chapter of "how men say hello" hasn't been written yet (I'm sorry), and the same goes for the final chapter of "All good things come in 3s". While I love both fanfictions dearly and I haven't lost motivation for them, I have been busy with work, studying and working on another big dnb project.

Also some things happened in the fandom regarding me which took the wind out of my wings and I have been in a downward spiral for the past 3 days but I finally caught myself again and I'm back to full energy ∑d(°∀°d) talking to my online friends and seeing such nice message really helps me to tune off all the negative hate thrown at me every few weeks! All of my readers are awesome and I love everyone one of you dearly! Some of u are very loyal and listen to my explanations regarding some topics of the past and accept and welcome the changes I introduce and I'm truly thankful for that. <3

Anon, thank you for praising my writing this extensively! It's a somewhat well-known fact that my first language isn't English so it brings me to tears to hear that people like my writing so much 😖💚 it's truly heartwarming!!

I will try to make some time to write on my fanfictions! I'm really looking forward to write the next chapter of "How man say hello" since Techno will send Dream some very explicit stuff and I can't wait to give my readers some more second-hand embarrassment (I know u all missed the feeling 💀✋)

See u around, anon! And I hope u didn't collapse of extensive dust Inhalation!! <3

[colourful-void]

Supporting Satoshi - an examination and comparison of JN36 and XY121

Part One: Snowballs do not cure depression but it was worth a shot

You know that episode of Pokemon where a gym leader beats Satoshi in a battle so hard that one of his pokemon gets mildly hurt (though there's no long term effects) and because of it he becomes depressed, closing himself off from his friends before someone comes along to pull him out of that mental state, and also severe weather phenomena is involved and a reflection of a persons mental state? Or rather, the two episodes?

So when I was watching Journeys, I noticed an episode that had a similar-- but distinctly different-- plot to an xy episode I had seen before. And what was particularly interesting was that while I couldn't stand the xy episode, the journeys episode was one of my favourites. I won't drag this out for you guys, I love the journeys episode and re watch it a LOT and the xy episode sort of just leaves me with a sour taste in my mouth. and don't go claiming its solely ship bias, because i saw the xy episode first and disliked it then.

This will analyze both of these episodes, comparing them against each other. Specifically within the context of how Goh and Serena both help Satoshi through a similar situation There will be some discussion of AmourShipping and Satogou in this analysis. I'm going to be a bit negative regarding Serena's actions and the potential "romantic" weight of them here, but I want to be clear that I Do Not dislike Serena as a character. Personally, I wish the writers had given her more room to grow outside of her romantic interests, but I do not hate Serena as a character. I do, however, disagree with her actions in this episode. Please don't take this out of context and dont be ship fighting in the comments, it's boring. This is a comparison of These Two Episodes, not of Goh and Serena and their respective ships as a whole.

This part mainly focuses on the xy episode and the second will focus mainly on the journeys. It's only divided into parts because of the tumblr post limit.

(If you like the xy episode or hate the journeys episode, awesome! having your own opinions is great. these are mine though, so i hope you'll listen to them)

With that out of the way, let's start. And I'm going to use mostly japanese names here because I'm taking screencaps from the subbed japanese copies.

The set up for each of these episodes is eerily similar as pointed out in the gag at the start.

Xy has a bit more set up before the episode in question though, with the initial loss and retreat into the forest by Satoshi taking place the episode before. The episode opens up proper with Satoshi taking time to breathe to himself, alone in the forest.

Emphasis is placed on him taking a deep breath, aided by the visuals showing them (thanks cold air) and the silence of the rest of the soundscape, with the only other sounds being the wind and some bird pokemon, plus some falling snow.

Journeys Satoshi starts off in a better mental state than Xy, with the episode starting off with him jogging along with his pokemon.

However, we can still see that he's been affected by the last battle he lost, against Saitou, as he's putting a lot of effort into training and doing better.

Which, doesn't go well for him, as he loses his next two battles as well, and drops in the World Championship ranking as a result

And he's pretty upset about it too. Same thing as over in xy. In both cases, a respective friend/love interest notes that Satoshi is upset and expresses concern.

He's got support from his friends in both situations! But that support comes across in very different ways.

But, to understand how that support manages to affect Satoshi, we need to understand the problem at play.

Now, I wanna make something clear here. Satoshi's problem is not that he is a sore loser. I'm not arguing that's not a contributing factor, or that he's not upset about the loss (particularly in the world championships), He's still bitter about the lost part, but the root of the problem is not losing, he's been shown to be fine with losing (if not a bit more motivated to win now) in prior episodes.

Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt, because they're losing battles. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are losing battles because he's not training them well enough. And to clarify, that's not my viewpoint, it's his. Satoshi's problem is that he's not good enough for himself, and he feels that that's something he has to fix on his own.

So how do we help him?

Our weather event in question is introduced in separate points in the episodes, but I'll cover them both now.

In xy, it's this snowstorm, which conveniently becomes a problem directly after Serena returns to the Pokemon Centre.

In journeys, it's a sandstorm! That's in near direct contrast to a snowstorm! Incredible.

Heading back to xy Satoshi, things aren't going great in the forest. Luckily, Serena's run off to find him.

I think it's of note here that Serena runs off with the best intentions, she wants to help Satoshi, plain and simple. It just sort of goes wrong along the way.

It's worth noting that Xy Satoshi tries to bring himself out of being sad by the tried and true method of "stop being sad"

Despite telling himself this, he doesn't get anywhere. Which makes sense, because it's not getting the the root of the problem. It's not even addressing it at all. He's just trying to 'be better', which isn't even a battle strategy. However, it is something I can see him saying, so this isn't a critique of Satoshi's thought process, but me pointing out that this isn't really effective. Which is supported by the narrative, because again, he doesn't get anywhere, he doesn't even move.

I can't show it in screencaps but the lights in Satoshi's eyes are shaking here, something that they consistently do throughout the series when he's feeling a particularly strong emotion. Keep that in mind. It couples well with another trait of his, and that's his hat!

And by that I mean how he hides his eyes with the brim of it when upset, something he does exactly as Serena shows up and calls out to him. Now, he's not upset that Serena is here. He's upset about the pokemon stuff still. He's trying to hide the fact that he's upset from Serena.

Serena starts off with her speech well, trying to appeal to Satoshi to let her in and talk things out. And maybe it's because he wasn't ready for it yet, or because of the way she phrases it (a lot of 'i' and 'me' language which can be helpful but can also come across as though she's making it about her. not her intent i don't think, but a possible interpretation.), it's not her fault for how Satoshi reacts regardless.

But how Satoshi reacts is not good.

Now it's really interesting to note that before this, Serena was standing while Satoshi was sitting, putting her above him in terms of active power, when it comes to how the shot is presented, but when Satoshi stands up, the camera tilts with the movement so that they're on equal level. Neat!

And Serena yells in return, scolding Satoshi for not talking about it. Not the best move, since pushing someone to talk about something that's upsetting them isn't really productive, but she's trying here and she's frustrated.

Satoshi continues to withdraw and self isolate, claiming it is his problem and that he wants to be left be. Now, this is the mindset of a clearly upset person and isolation may not be the best option, but he did make the explicit request to be left alone here.

He's clearly upset as he turns away from Serena's eye and slumps over a little.

And then Serena throws a snowball at him.

Angry as he is, you can see Satoshi's expression change when he sees Serena's reaction.

Serena tells Satoshi that she's not like the Satoshi she knows, who is always full of energy and positive and a leader, and a bunch of other positive traits. The problem here, is that Serena's looking at an idealized version of Satoshi. And while the intent here was probably meant to be something more like "you have so many wonderful traits about you I know you can do this", coupled with the snowballs and the phrasing, it seems as though Serena is scolding Satoshi for being sad.

Or rather, being angry with him for not living up to her idealized version of him, and not wanting him to express any negitave emotions.

Which is sort of a really bad mindset.

The snowballs continue, never once does Satoshi fight back. In fact, he stops arguing entirely after the first one. Serena knocks him off his feet and tells him he's not being himself, before running off. (In the english dub, Serena claims that Satoshi isn't being "the real satoshi" and then demands that the real Satoshi be "given back", so it could be worse)

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up. Something like this just isn't like him. He's just gotta stop being sad!

Now personally, I really disagree with the idea that "being upset" isn't "like a person". That's because based off of my own experiences, I know it can be really damaging to hold the mindset that any negative emotions you feel aren't a part of you and that you shouldn't be upset because you're usually a positive and happy person. Not the case with every person, but I personally really have a problem with shows telling children that they just shouldn't be upset instead of processing their emotions in a meaningful way. (The journeys episode doesn't do an outstanding job of it either, but this is a bit of a tangent anyway. A show that does do this right is "OK KO! Let's be Heroes" which actually deals with this problem in greater depth and does a fantastic job of it.)

But the snowball scene ends here. Now I'll get back to Journeys in a moment, but since Serena has finished her part of the comparison for the most part, I'm going to summarize a bit more of the xy episode.

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up.

The snowstorm kicks in, Serena get back annoyed, then similarly groans and yells, and the whole xy gang + pokemon go running off in search of Satoshi. Pikachu appears the most concerned.

Now Serena tells the others she lost her cool and said something horrible to Satoshi, but explains its because Satoshi is someone she admires. Cool motive, I get it, still kinda bad.

and in the end, it's not Serena's words that get he message across to Satoshi. The solution to this problem was Satoshi finding a way to reaffirm his abilities and instinct.

In the xy episode, he helps some pokemon out of the tree, and when his very cool frog friend shows up, they're able to work together with their bond to save this one from falling off a cliff.

Here's the point. Satoshi learns by doing, by actions. He needs to see first hand that there are ways of getting past his problems, and that it's worth having the courage to keep going. The lesson is about valuing pokemon as equals and partners, and specifically that trying to be better as the trainer alone isn't going to help.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am and I'm not sleeping until this is finished so we gotta keep things moving.

This was no doubt Serena's intent to get a similar point, but she goes about it the wrong way. She tries to convey this with words, as conversation and motivational words have helped her in the past (Elle's words of praise stick with her, Satoshi's words from when they were kids, etc). It's a good idea, but their different ways of learning and growing from a similar situation are incompatible, and that's why things don't work out in Serena's favour. There's also still the problem of "pulling yourself together" not being helpful in this case.

There's also a very similar line in this scene to the one at the end of the journeys episode, as Satoshi says to his frog that they should start over from scratch. It's essentially the same phrase with different wording. It's great. The Storm ends as he realizes this as well! Wonderful in terms of pathetic fallacy.

The gang all reunites, its nice. Satoshi thanks Serena for what she said after apologizing to everyone, which contradicts what he said earlier but I've already established that I dislike this message here so I won't go over it too much. I guess he's right in a literal sense in that in response to her words he went and ran until he tripped off a cliff but the emotional growth here was because of his own actions (and the frogs), not Serena's. Sorry Serena, you'll get em next time.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am as I write this so we gotta keep things moving.

So. What about Goh?

Well...

(Part Two here on account of image limit!!)

[carriereedwrites]

POPULAR WRITING ADVICE (THAT MIGHT BE SHIT)

If you’re a writer, and you’re on the internet (clearly), chances are you’ve come across the same writing advice over and over and over again. You’ve scoured hours upon hours of Google search results looking for that one piece of advice that’ll confirm you’re not a complete hack (note: you’re not, and I’m about to explain why in a minute).

All you ever see is how writers hold most of these common pieces of advice in the highest esteem and I’m here to tell you... they’re stinking WRONG.

Below is my list of the most common pieces of advice you may hear writers tell other writers... that may be full of shit. Yes, I am fully aware people will have differing opinions and experiences. And no, I don't care if you think I'm wrong. Take what resonates and go.

Fun Fact: I’ve been in a few Twitter Troll battles in my time. I am READY to fight.

1. "Just Write."

This piece of advice will trigger me to aggro in seconds. If I see another writer tell this to another writer with Writer's Block, I will eat their soul. Straight. Up.

If you are a writer who's primary goal is to get published, this is the shittiest piece of fucking advice to offer. Let me tell you why.

There are so many factors to writing to be published, especially when considering the traditional pub route. You have to know what genre you're going to write in so you can pitch it effectively. You have to know what the word count for that genre is. You have to know the "promises" and expectations of that genre so you can plot your book to the best of your ability and avoid a thousand rewrites.

TELLING PEOPLE TO "JUST WRITE" WASTES THEIR TIME AND THAT CAN BE MENTALLY DEVASTATING.

Explain what you actually mean by this saying (which is, don't worry about the little details or making it perfect the first time; Write it all out and edit later.) And if you didn't know what this saying actually meant, now you know. "Just Write" will not solve all of your problems. It's probably do more harm than good.

2. "The first sentence of your books needs to be SUPER MEGA AWESOME or else readers won't even bother buying it."

Another mf piece of advice that'll make me aggro IMMEDIATELY.

Yes, ONE of the most important parts of any book is the first sentence. And with how much reader preference varies, you really do need to hook the reader as soon as you can and as deep as you can. It helps your chances for that reader to buy your book and give it the chance it deserves.

But as soon as they realize you're writing Third-person omni when they were really looking for a First-person POV, that reader is going to put your book down. It doesn't matter how long you've slaved over that first sentence, or how artistically perfect it is. You can't keep readers who weren't looking for your book in the first place.

What you CAN do as a good writer is to make sure your book has the same passion and care throughout the book, not just a wham-bam thank you ma'am first paragraph. Chances are, the people who are looking for your kind of book, will appreciate it.

3. "Write everyday, every chance you get, even if you don't feel motivated because that's what true writers do."

NO. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. *baps with a newspaper* Nnnooo.

Don't... don't make yourself write. Especially if you don't have time or the motivation to do so (read up on "Spoon Theory" or "Energy Pennies." You're welcome).

If you don't feel like sitting down to write, do something else. Read. Talk a walk. Go shopping. Don't feel bad about NOT writing, JFC. Please, don't devastate your mental health just because some stranger on the internet tells you that TRUE writers write all the time.

If you read any author's blog, they are NOT writing 24/7. Go on, go find your favorite writer/author and read their blog. And come tell me that they don't talk about other shit besides writing. Go. I'm serious. It's a challenge. Bring me back an author's blog who talks about writing every single moment of their lives and I will... idk, eat my pants. Idfk.

4. "If you don't have time to read, you don't have time to write."

I mean, hell. If the Scream King of the Literary Fiction world said this, then this must mean it's true. (Fun Fact: it's not).

To an extent, yes. This is absolutely correct. You should make time to read. This is how you expand your "set of tools" as a writer. Reading is how you learn and grow and expand your craft. Blah, blah, blah. All that shit.

Even though most writers take this to heart, don't. There are OTHER ways to consume media. Watching movies, and breaking down their plots and pacing. Listening to audio books while stuck in traffic. Heck, reading fanfic online is a VALID form of media! IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE BOOKS, PEOPLE.

5. "You need to finish what you start."

Nah. Don't listen to this shit, either.

Listen, when you become an author who's in a five-book contract, the pressure is ON to get book number three done and dusted. Finishing what you started isn't a shitty piece of advice in this sense.

However, as a writer who's just started on your journey, you don't need to develop this skill just yet. In fact, the only thing that you should concern yourself with is staying motivated and letting your creativity fly at this point.

There will be a time where your brain wants to write something COMPLETELY different than what you ACTUALLY need to finish. And in a show of solidarity, you will abstain from writing anything new until the that nagging need passes.

And now, you've ended up here five months later, at 3 'o clock in the morning, trying to ignore that dread of never finishing anything. DON'T BE THIS STUBBORN. OR THIS STUPID.

Just write what you feel like writing. It's much better to get it all out and then get back to the thing you need to finish. Just don't lose track of your main project and you'll be fine.

And that's my list for the most common pieces of writing advice that might be full of shit. Was there any I missed? What was the shittiest piece of advice you've EVER received? Let me know!

~ Happy Writing, Ya'll ~