#pointless peanut post

[anintelligentoctopus]

Can't believe I never got round to taking a photo of the super adorable Peanuts Christmas card Chuck @bicolumbo sent me

[steviewashere]

Grief is Love in Secondary Form

Rating: General CW: Referenced Parental Death Tags: Post-Canon, Post-Season 4, Established Relationship, Grieving/Mourning, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Dialogue Heavy, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Birthday Traditions

Today would've been my dad's fifty-ninth birthday. He's been gone my whole life, I don't remember him in any way, but it's the thought that counts. And while my mind is heavy at the reminder, this little thing is a love story with my grief and peace. As well as the grief I share for my late mother. This is my grief for her, too. <3

🎂—————🎂

It’s her birthday today and there isn’t a cake.

He stands in the kitchen, barefoot and pajamas, hands wrapped around a lukewarm mug of black coffee. The living room window is open. A light breeze floating through the space. Birds chirping on the highest branch of the Douglas Fir outside. Steve is still snoring away in the bedroom.

Another year without her presence and he’s still not used to it. To the silence that lingers after her. The way the world seems to move, to dance, to sing and chat. He’s still not used to the now sixteen years of waking himself up, dressing in his clothes, using the bathroom, and preparing his own meals. Or the way he still isn’t sure how she made her coffee, but he keeps trying, if only to see if he likes it, too.

The dining chair cushion is cold under him when he sits down. Dining room windows sealed shut, but the blinds pulled up to shine the sun down onto his bare arms. Warm and bright. Receding for mere seconds behind the rolling clouds. He’s never understood quiet. Part of the reason he’s always filled it with noise. Whatever he could find. Music or pots and pans or television. Today, though, he can make room for the white noise, the lull lingering around him. His breaths heavy and soft in it all. And his left leg bouncing up and down, barely skimming the table’s underside, a gentle wooden knock.

Slurps his coffee and lets it congeal to the sides of the cup when he’s unsatisfied with the taste. Maybe next time he tries the vanilla creamer. Maybe next time he just goes for a glass of orange juice instead. He settles back in his chair, arms wrapped around his chest, left leg crossed over the right. Foot jiggling side to side, hitting the soft fat of his calf. Swipes the hair dangling over his collarbone and wonders how long hers would be if she sat next to him. He wants to grow his down to the center of his back. That’s how hers was before she got sick; at least that’s what he thinks, what he can remember.

In the silence, he closes his eyes and tries to replicate the sound of her voice. If it was saccharine or husky in his brain. But it’s pointless. He hasn’t been able to remember since a month after she passed. Only six years old.

Some short time later, Steve stumbles out of the bedroom. Hair spiked from his scalp. T-shirt tangled on his body. One sock missing. Eddie grins at him, gestures to the pot of coffee that’s remained hot on the countertop, and pats the vacant chair next to him.

When Steve joins him, Eddie simply breathes. Staring out the window—still. Some squirrels run up and down the trunks of trees, carrying hefty loads of peanuts and broken cashews. He smiles, despite the melancholy knot in his chest.

“You’re up early,” Steve rasps. His voice still sleep-riddled and molasses slow with his waking.

Eddie hums. “Yeah, I just needed some time to think, I guess.”

A not so subtle slurp and smack, Steve’s always loud about his coffee. Maybe she liked hers the way Steve likes his; one sugar cube and a splash of whole milk. He’s tried that combination before, but maybe it would be better from Steve’s hands. “What about?” He asks, innocent and soft.

“My mama,” he answers. “Would’ve been her…forty-eighth birthday, I believe. Was just sort of absorbing the silence this morning.” Eddie leans forward in his chair, laying his forearms on the table, clasping his hands together. He eyes Steve—his still rumpled face glowing warm and eyes droopy. He reaches out a gentle hand, softly caressing the side of his face. Even the skin under his palm is warm. Drops it away so that it’s face up on the surface of the table. “I’m finding that I don’t mind it as much as I did when I was a little kid.”

Steve hums this time. “Is it okay to ask how old you were?”

“I was six,” Eddie answers. “Only got to know her for a couple years. She was sick half the time. Nothing that could’ve been prevented.” He shrugs. “But it still sucked when all she was was noise and laughter, you know? I don’t even remember her voice now.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Eh,” he squeaks, shrugging again. “I’ve made my peace with it.”

Then, Steve sets his mug down. The clatter of it unusually loud in the room. They glance at each other. Steve’s eyes concerned and sad. “How can you make peace with something like that? I feel like when my mom dies, I’ll just be insufferable.”

“Well,” Eddie begins. “I mourned my mama a long time ago. Mourning and grieving are different, you know? Like—“ He runs his hand over Steve’s forearm, massaging into his veins. He tilts his head in thought. “—I mourned her when she died. And mourned her for a few months after. Her absence noticeable in everything I did. But…The memories are what I mourned. The relationship we had. The fun we shared. 

“I’ve been grieving my whole life, though. You know, you never quite stop grieving.” He stops to take a deep breath, sighing away the hurt that tinges the edges of his lungs. Continues, slow and careful, “I grieve her presence in moments where she should be. Like when I graduated high school, finally. When I moved out on my own. When I fell in love. She should be here for me to share my life with, but she isn’t.” Eddie sighs once more, shaking his head. He scoots his hand to Steve’s, holding it with an iron grip. “But I know that if she were here in the state I remember her in, she’d be miserable. I wouldn’t want that for her. And though it took a lot of time, a lot of healing, and a lot of reassurance, I’ve had to make peace with it. For my sanity.”

Steve squeezes their hands harshly. “But what if she came back…not sick?” When they look once more at each other, his eyes are wide and pleading. Like he truly wants Eddie to consider the possibility.

And he has. He truly has. “I wouldn’t want that either,” he murmurs truthfully. “We know each other from different moments in time. She knew me when I was a child and I was playful and I was immature. When I was…stupid about the world around me and still curious.”

He shakes his hand free of Steve’s sweaty grasp. Instead, he brings both up and holds Steve’s face, cupping it gently, caressing his tender skin. Eddie sets his arms down on the table, elbows knocking the wood, bringing the head he’s holding. Steve reaches out with a tentative palm, nestled between his neck and shoulder. He leans into the touch, tilting his head a little, eyes closing. Steve’s thumb tickles the top of his collarbone.

“And…I knew her when she was sick. That’s all I really remember her as,” Eddie whispers, “I knew her without hair. Knew her with tired eyes, bruised purple underneath from how little sleep she was getting. She had a constant rasp in her chest and her skin was paler than mine, which can you believe?” He chuckles briefly, it’s not funny and he knows if he chances a peek, Steve will only look on with gentle horror and unfathomable sadness. Takes another breath (who knew that grieving was full of just deep breaths?). “But I only remember her towards the end of her life. I wouldn’t be able to tell you who she was outside of that.” Opens his eyes and realizes how painfully right he was about what he’d see in Steve. He soothes his thumbs over his skin. Trying, in some way, to tell him it’s alright.

They fall silent again. Steve’s eyes pooling with tears, darting between Eddie’s. Then, he breaks the seal. “What do we do now?”

He hasn’t really thought about that before. Hasn’t ever heard that question in the face of what could be considered his sob story. But, the truth that he digs from within him, he hopes it’s enough. “We love,” Eddie whispers, “that’s all you can do in grief. You hold on to the ones you love and wish for a healthy tomorrow. And you, sweetheart, are the love of my life.” He squishes Steve’s cheeks lightly with his grasp, leans forward, and plants a soft kiss between his eyebrows. “And we’re going to create so many memories in our lifetime. Maybe I couldn’t have the chance with her and her memory, but I have the chance with you. I will always grieve, but I will always find a way to love. Because there is always room to remember you, Steve. I’ll hold onto you until the day one of us dies, and then some.” He drags his hands down to Steve’s shoulders. They’re slightly tense, to which he presses in to try and relax. “You wanna do something that I like to do for her birthday? I usually did it with Wayne, but you’re my family, too. It’s tradition.”

“Sure,” Steve mutters, “we can do whatever you want.”

Eddie nods, his smile stretching across his face, the corners of his eyes crinkling with it. “Let’s go buy a cake from the grocery store bakery and tonight, when we’re ready to eat it, we’ll go out on the balcony and look at the stars. Wayne bought a star in her name. So in a way, she’s always sort of there, even when it feels like she isn’t. Sound good?”

“Sounds wonderful, Eds. I love you.”

“Love you too, sweet thing.”

🎂—————🎂 Little thing here about my family :) My dad used to have this cake he'd request every year for his birthday when he was little. It was from a 1970s Spring magazine. It's in the shape of the Easter bunny's head, chocolate cake on the inside, sprinkled with a coating of coconut flakes. My nana used to make it for his birthday when I was little, we'd put candles and light them up, I'd make a wish, and then we'd share it. My uncle used to make spaghetti, too, his spaghetti was always the best. He was cool. Anyway. Also, somebody in my family bought a star in my dad's name. Which this program started in 1979, for context. So, Eddie was six around 1972, somebody would've had to buy it some years later. But I like the sentiment anyway.

[pickinglilahs]

Blackeclipse for the soul

AO3 link if you prefer to read there Part 10; Part 11; Part 12; Part 13; Part 14 CW: Dissociating/reference to Walburga's A+ parenting

Madam Rosmerta's reply came later that night.

James and Remus were sitting on the bed doing homework. Peter was in his own bed for once, already passed out behind the curtains. Regulus was just walking into the room when there was a tapping at the window.

Regulus dropped his bag and went over to let the owl in. The small tawny dropped a slip of paper into Remus' lap and flew right back out the window.

Remus unfolded it and smiled.

Dear Boys, You are more than welcome here for any event. I look forward to seeing you Saturday at 3. Love, Your Favorite Pub Owner P.S. The galleons are going toward your tab.

James, who had read over his shoulder, asked, "Do we still have an open tab?"

Remus handed the note to Regulus, who was now climbing onto the bed himself, and shrugged, "That or she's already opened us a new one."

Regulus glanced at the note before setting it on the bedside table. He had already stripped to his pants and undershirt and was settling back against the headboard beside Remus.

As Regulus summoned a book from his bag, Remus shifted to rest his head on the taller boy's shoulder. Regulus rested his own head on top of Remus' and cracked open his book.

The three stayed like that for a while, reading and taking notes. When the yawning started, James made them all put their books away and settle down.

He pulled Remus to him, head on his shoulder, leg hiked up on his hip. Regulus draped himself over Remus' back, leg slotting under Remus' and arm resting with his over James' chest.

Remus decided that he loved being squished between his boys.

~~~

Saturday came quickly.

Sirius was a force to be reckoned with as he flew about, making sure everyone told their friends and making sure all of said friends were indeed coming.

Saturday morning saw James being hauled out of bed—before dawn—and dragged to the pitch for an impromptu flying practice. Sirius had, at least, been gracious enough to deposit Kingsley in James' place in the double bed.

The three sleeping boys awoke concerned and confused at the change in sleeping arrangement, but no one claimed to understand Sirius' meddling.

So, they lent Kingsley some clothes, and the three made their way down to breakfast. Of course, as soon as they got there, Regulus was whisked away by Barty, so it was just Remus and Kingsley at the Gryffindor table.

They were soon joined by Benji and Peter, who both laughed at Sirius' morning antics. The four of them then proceeded to Hogsmeade, knowing it would be pointless to wait for James and Sirius.

They stopped in Honeydukes and Dervish and Bangs. Peter had them stop at the owl post, and both Kingsley and Remus wanted to stop at Tomes and Scrolls. They popped into the Hogshead for a bit to say hi to Aberforth, who rolled his eyes and served them sandwiches and butterbeer.

At quarter to 3, they wandered into The Three Broomsticks to find Sirius and James at the bar, chatting up Madam Rosmerta. James pulled Remus into his lap and Kingsley stood behind Sirius, arms around him and chin on his shoulder.

Rosmerta cooed at them and broke out more butterbeer. A few minutes later, they helped her push three tables together and rearrange the chairs.

They had just sat down when Regulus came in, physically dragging Barty by the ear. Evan and Pandora were wandering behind them, both clearly amused. After forcing Barty into a seat, Regulus collapsed into James' lap.

"Never again. Never again." He mumbled into James' shoulder. James wrapped his arms around Regulus without pausing his conversation with Benji.

Remus smiled and leaned over to kiss the top of his head. "All good love?"

Regulus grumbled in response.

"I got you some of those peanut butter candies from Honeydukes if you want them."

Regulus turned his face to peek at Remus. Remus smiled and reached into the bag he left under the table. Extracting a handful of the small candies, Remus passed them to Regulus and got a kiss for his efforts.

Remus smiled and turned to Pandora, who was asking about where he got his jumper.

~~~

As successful as the gathering was, it dissolved as soon as Barty tried to talk to James.

No one really knows who said what, but it ended when the two had to be forcibly separated. Bloody noses and split lips, the two were drug outside and hauled in opposite directions.

Luckily, no one else was hurt, but Madam Rosmerta was very upset with all of them. Peter, Benji, and Kingsley stayed to help clean up and put the tables back. When Sirius was sure James would be alright, he came back to help as well.

The twins had taken Barty back to the castle while Remus and Regulus took James to the Shrieking Shack. They broke in unnoticed and congregated in what was probably once a living room.

Remus made James sit on the floor and crouched down in front of him. He spelled away the blood and healed his lip. His nose wasn't broken, but he did have a slight concussion from when his head collided with the table.

Satisfied that James was going to be fine, Remus sighed and stood. He walked over to Regulus to keep from hitting James himself but quickly realized Regulus had dissociated.

"Reggie?" Remus stepped into his line of sight, but the other boy looked right through him. "Starshine? Can you hear me?"

Remus heard James shuffling to his feet behind them but waved him away.

"Regulus. If you can hear me, I need you to look at me." When there was no response, Remus switched tactics. "I'm going to touch you, okay Starshine?"

Slowly, Remus reached for Regulus' Marked hand. When there was still no reaction, Remus gently brought his hand to the Mark on his own cheek. He closed his eyes and sent Regulus as much calm and peace as he could muster.

After a long moment, Regulus came back to himself. Remus' eyes flew open as he felt Regulus grip his fingers. Remus sighed in relief when their gazes connected.

Remus kept their Marks together and asked softly, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Regulus looked over to James, who had sat back down, head in his hands. He looked back to Remus. Clearly, he did not want to talk about it, but he also didn't want James to blame himself either.

Remus nodded. They had been through this before with Sirius. Neither of the boys were good with one-on-one violence and no one needed to ask why.

"Jamie," Remus called. James looked up, obviously trying very hard not to cry. Remus held out a hand. "Come here Sunshine."

James slowly got to his feet and shuffled over. He took Remus' outstretched hand and was yanked into a hug.

They stayed like that for a long time; holding onto one another like a lifeline.

@starchasersunseeker @poetrypirate @niad4827 @bradley-95147-blog @shyshadows430

[bitesize-astrology]

Feedback or Foolishness?

Monday - May 6, 2024

If you're going to be in the public eye the way I have found myself since 2022 you have to be prepared for "the comments section." While anyone who puts themselves out there wants constructive feedback, wants to improve their game, you have to be prepared to slog thru the pointless comments as well.

The key is to make sure these intellectually void comments don't have you doubting yourself, or changing your message or style to satisfy the vocal "peanut gallery."

And this is the message of Mercury conjunct Chiron today at 21° Aries. This means make sure you keep your message on point, don't be distracted by the naysayers. Don't receive their drivel as fact or reality, says Black Moon Lilith as she moves to 24° Virgo.

There is a 15-hour Moon in Aries void of course that will end at 5:42pm ET. Use this time to rethink any comments you want to post on social media, and ask yourself if it's really a good idea.

Because those who are not as self-aware as you will use a Moon in Aries (especially during a void of course period!!) to spew all kinds of junk, and enjoy themselves immensely. They have no life that brings them joy, and will do all they can to try to steal some of yours.

==========================================

***Can't be at UNITE THE LIGHT Lightworker Summit to hear my presentation on being a ROGUE LIGHTWORKER, get your LIVE STREAM tickets instead. Here's the link:

[tea-dragonz]

Ross Lore Part 1

Separate posts + long doc won in the end, so we’re doing it like this

This comes from the video A Parkour Map Designed to Make Us RAGE!!!, posted on August 2, 2020. While this isn't the first time that Max and Ross' characters have been given lore (the Overalls v. Jorts court case preceded this), this appears to be the first time that the running gag of "Ross Lore" was mentioned by name. Below are summaries of the notable pieces of Ross Lore mentioned:

Qbert’s bro, Burt is a sponge block given to Max and Ross at the beginning of the level. Partway through the video Ross locks himself in a shelter of wooden planks to get out of doing the parkour. He places Bert down and Max breaks him, leading to the creation of Sponge. Sponge is a Minecraft sponge block and Ross’ good buddy that he hasn’t seen in weeks. He brought the blue punch that tasted green to Max’s birthday.

Ross likes to use a dagger in combat.

Ross burnt down an orphanage to stop what he calls the moon people. Max claims that he burnt down the wrong orphanage, but Ross says that he did it first to prevent the moon people from doing it and caused them to leave as a result. According to Max the other orphanage was their target and the reason they left was because they accomplished their goal, thus making Ross’ arson pointless

Ross took a group of elderly people camping and returned with 4 more elderly folks at the end. They went into the woods as a group of 6 and came back as a group of 14.

Ross taught a group of kids how to swim in shark infested waters. He refuses to elaborate on it.

Ross invented toothpicks (patent and everything) and sued another guy who claimed to have invented toothpicks.

Ross invented being pregnant.

Ross was bullied on the playground by school kids.

Ross crashed a wedding and ended up marrying the father.

Ross’ left eye is glass.

Ross opened a refrigerator store for 2 months. During that time he only sold 1 fridge and went bankrupt, then faked his death in a freak refrigerator accident in Milwaukee. Ross is the moniker he took after faking his death, though he refuses to share his original name.

Ross took 7 people and a parrot to prom.

Ross dug a huge hole at the beach and buried 4 kids. They were attempting to build a tunnel system underneath a sandcastle and it caved in. Ross himself almost got buried but managed to dig his way out. Whether the kids died or not is never elaborated on.

Ross opened a motel for dogs after watching the movie Hotel.

Ross got caught in a ladder. As a result he still has 19 years of bad luck to go and a prosthetic foot.

At the age of 14, Ross had to get his 7th and 6th fingers removed on his right hand. Max remembers it as his left, and Ross reminds him that that was his foot.

Ross had to get the extra toes on his left foot removed, which he keeps in a jar.

Ross soul bonded to Van Gogh and tried to cut off his own ear, but the safety scissors didn’t work. Max says that they did work and he passed out, though his ear was presumably sewn back on.

Ross sunk a ship in the parking lot, apparently in an attempt to test the boat. Ross said that it was hard to get it into the pavement. An unnamed “he” got really mad at this.

Ross threw up at the movie theater and at a funeral. They don’t talk about the funeral incident.

Growing up, Ross told his guidance counselor that he wanted to be an astronaut pirate and ended up becoming one somehow. The guidance counselor died at some point, and this funeral may be related to the other funeral incident.

Ross beat the sun in a staring contest. It is partially the reason why he has a glass eye

The other reason is the time he helped invent peanut butter.

Ross is the hero of Pennsylvania. He says to check the history books.

Ross named McDonalds. The founder originally wanted to go with “Wacky Floppy Burger Buns”, but Ross told him to call it McDonalds.

Ross volunteered at the retirement home and beat some ladies at bingo.

There was another incident involving old ladies in which they were running an illegal knitting business and “Professor Ross had to teach them a lesson”. They apparently threw the first punch and threw knitting needles at him so Ross pulled out his katana and beat them up.

The censor duck that bleeps out curse words in Max’s videos does it as a paid job and needs the money to turn the heating bill on. He also needs to pay back his bail to Ross in order to see his ducklings again.

Other non-Ross Lore notable things:

Max points out that bottom of Ross’ left foot on his Minecraft skin is discolored.

[randomnameless]

Do you agree that anyone that uses death of the author as argument shouldn't be arguing about a text? Because according to them all interpretations are valid so why argue against other people's interpretations?

Mmh...

I guess it's part of the duality of fandom life - people want to talk about the game are very involved in it, but they also create fun headcanons to explore said game's lore/setting/characters.

So in way, participating in fandom and even writing fanfiction, or saying stupid things like "hc : Nabateans attach a great importance to golden trinkets" is, in a way, pushing your own interpretation over the game's.

But at one point, it depends on what you want to argue about.

Argue about headcanon? Uh... it's like arguing about what topping you prefer on your ice cream. It's your ice cream, your tastes, so you can prefer chocolate cookies or peanuts and it's, you know, not open to discussion as in "talking with you made me realise peanuts are was tastier than chocolate chip cookies".

I like to talk and discuss and see other people's headcanons because it's fun and when some of ours match we can nerd about pointless things like warm rocks or nabatean laying eggs, but you won't see me being an ass and tell them "uh your headcanon sucks, you should put blue cheese on your ice cream".

Now, arguing about canon?

FE16 (and Fe Fodlan in general) is a game where the devs forgot to hire a continuity game and thought letting the world "vague" would make it look "deeper and richer" than it is. 10k years of lore, after all. And we have at least 2 unreliable narrators, that are Lords so who are protagonists and usually should be believed... expect that the game shows us they're full of nonsense regarding various topics.

But, unlike headcanon, canon isn't subjective, it's the same game (well... depending on the audio, it's not) everyone played, some people were kind enough to create a website where every line (+ dub!) is available, so it's not a question of interpretation as much as going to read and check the datamine website and the hundreds of YT videos, were people recorded their PT.

Was Burnie surrounded by flames, effectively preventing her escape from her pyre, or not?

Does Cyril mention to Mercedes how he only ate every couple of days before coming to the monastery (so under House Goneril's good care and in the Almyran army) or not?

Those things can be easily checked, and there's no interpretation.

If you don't like canon, you can churn out headcanon and have fun developing them, maybe finding people who like them and expend them themselves!

But for various reasons (is it because fanfiction has a bad rep since the 2000s for being something, idk, teenage girls write? or because it's not seen as very serious (tm) as a redshit post?) some people in the Fodlan fandom don't really want to confess they don't like the canon, and prefer the headcanon/fanfiction version of the game portrayed through a certain fic that, in turn, influenced how canon is perceived by some devoted fans.

(and let's not forget the lolcalisation that, too, didn't like the base game and edited it for ~ reasons ~)

And imo, Death of the author, in those fandom circles, is a roundabout way to say "the canon is not conclusive so i interpret the situation as this, but it's totes not my headcanon nor a fanfiction bcs i'm no gross fangirl, it's still canon, but my interpretation of the canon"

Tldr : Arguing about headcanon is as pointless and fruitless as starting a shipwar, and in the 2020s apparently it's too shameful to confess liking/writing fanfictions, so instead you like and write "your own interpretations of canon or how it should be" instead, using various theories like "Death of the Author" to validate your creative process, bcs fanfics gross'n'bad'n'only for lonely teenager girls, i guess.

[bowlzone]

Today's cereal is Reese's Puffs Minis!

Initial impressions: These 'Minis' are a part of a new General Mills rework of their existing cereal franchises into tiny corn balls that bring to mind Dippin' Dots. So far they have miniaturized Trix, Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Lucky Charms as well as these Puffs. The reasoning for this 'honey I shrunk the kids'-ing of their most popular products escapes me somewhat, as the transition to corn balls alter some of these cereals for the worst. Lucky Charms especially rely heavily on their oat base as the backbone of their appeal as a cereal, what is their Minis remake bringing to the table? Needless to say, I go into this bowl as a Minis septic.

Post bowl thoughts: My first thought with this cereal is that they absolutely need to be eaten with a spoon. The tiny size means reaching into the bag with your bare hand and grabbing a fistful to munch on isn't a practical method of snacking. This isn't necessarily a bad thing though, as they really shine in milk. Despite looking like some sort of pet food pellet, the texture they bring is surprisingly pleasant. This might be one of the best ways to ingest a cereal that is just a corn ball, the off-putting aspects of that texture are too minute to be noticed here and instead what you get is a tiny ball that dissolves into nothing as you chew on it, but in a good way. The size does mean they are susceptible to getting soggy very quickly, but the weird juxtaposition between the proportions of my spoon and the cereal pieces meant that I seemed to eat the bowl extremely quickly. As with normal Reece's Puffs their overall taste is very peanut forward, however I think the Minis increased surface area means they have a more pungent taste? I'd love to hear what others think of this, as I'll admit it's been a long time since I've had a standard sized Puff. Despite my skepticism coming in, I actually really enjoyed these Minis. They are kind of pointless, but it could be argued that description is applicable to cereal as a whole. I'm glad these frivolous Minis get to exist.

[ladyyellow-thegremlin]

Hello, I’ve lurked here on whump tumblr for a while, but now I’ve finally worked myself up to post some of my whump writing, so here’s some of my poor whumpee dude trying to put his life back together and also helping a stray dog :)

Trigger warnings: implied past abuse of a minor, reference to scars, self dehumanization (character refers to himself as a mutt), implied past animal abuse. I think that’s about it? Never done this before so please forgive me if I did the trigger warnings wrong

The fridge was empty. He’d scraped out the last of the peanut butter three days ago. Even his stock of energy drinks was long gone. That was fine, he’d gone for longer without food. He knew it was pointless to put it off, he’d have to go out for groceries at some point, but he couldn’t bring himself to go out of the apartment. Out where people could see him, out where children would hide behind their parents at the sight of him. He hated summer. In winter at least he could cover up, nobody had to see his frankensteined body. He’d considered wearing winter clothes anyway, but even he wasn’t crazy enough to wear a turtleneck sweater in ninety degree heat. Starving was better than heatstroke. Who knows, maybe someone would drop by and help him out. He laughed bitterly, nobody would help him, not again. How many times had he done this? He never answered his phone, and every time somebody had dropped by, he’d just told them to get lost, he didn’t need help. He’d go out that night, yeah, that was a good plan. Same one as always. He’d put off getting stared at until he was in the store, at least. Damnit, that’s stupid. Why put it off, right? Might as well get it over with.

He considered putting on some pants instead of shorts, but decided against it. The marks around his neck were what he really cared about covering, if those were on display then who cared about the rest. He grabbed his wallet, keys and pocket knife before peeking out the door to make sure no neighbors were around. When he was sure no one was coming, he exhaled and stepped outside, walking as quickly as he could to his car without seeming suspicious.

The shopping trip went as usual, stocking up like a broke doomsday prepper, playing “grocery aisle Packman”, and receiving a few disdainful looks from a mother to end the game. ‘Cause of course, how dare he come out in public, make everybody else’s day uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry sir, but your card declined.”

“What? I-I—“ he looked to see if he had any cash in his wallet, two one dollar bills. Great. He was holding up the line, he could feel people looking at him, shit, shit. He had to get out of here. “Never mind, it’s fine, I-I’ll just put these—put these back,” he grabbed the items and hastily put them back in the cart, dropping more than a few. “I’m sorry,” he laughed awkwardly.

After some Grocery Aisle Packman 2: where the hell did I get these things from boogaloo; he hightailed it back to his car and took his phone off of ‘do not disturb’ for the first time in a few weeks. He didn’t know many people, so there weren’t that many texts. Mainly just his sister and therapist. Heh. His mom had texted him too.

Are you okay? Your therapist just called and said you haven’t been coming to your appointments again.

I know you’re there. Please answer.

I’m cutting you off until you start going to your appointments again, please call me.

Damnit. He called her.

“Hey Mom.”

“Conner, I was worried sick! What have you been doing?”

“I’m sorry, I forgot to check my phone.”

“For two weeks? Please don’t do that to me, I was just about to drive down and check on you. Seriously, how much effort does it take to check your phone? It’s the least you could do.”

“Sorry.”

“Why haven’t you been going to your appointments again? And don’t say you were sick, you used that excuse twice already. Even if you were sick, you could at least text him and let him know that you can’t make it.”

“Alright, fine. You wanna know why? I can’t take it! I can’t take going outside and having everyone…everyone…stare at me, okay? That’s why; you happy?”

“No, I’m not happy. Frankly, get a grip. You can’t live your life like this. Suck it up and go outside, people don’t notice you as much as you think.”

“Why’d you have to cut me off? I can’t get to the appointment if I don’t have money for gas.”

“Because that was the only way to get your attention, and don’t change the subject.”

“Fine. I’ll go. I’ll go, alright? Can I have some money for food?”

“You let your fridge go empty again?” She sighed. “How many days?”

“…three.”

“Damnit Conner! I’m sick and tired of taking care of you, you’ve got to pull it together. What do you think starving yourself’s going to do? You’re always complaining about looking like a freak, you know half your problem would be solved if you’d just put on some weight.”

“I know, I know.”

“I’m going to give you some money for food and gas, but until I see you taking some responsibility and making an effort to get your life together, you’re on your own.”

“Mo—“

“Don’t give me that, this is as hard for me as it is for you, but it’s for your own good.” She hung up. He checked his account, a hundred dollars. He didn’t want to go back into the store, he’d just go drive through someplace.

He hadn’t been outside in two weeks, so he figured he’d take his mom’s advice and get out for a bit, but he still went to a cemetery instead of a real park. Well, it was a step in the right direction. He sat down on a bench. Just as he opened his food, he heard a rustling. His hand darted to his pocket knife, but he relaxed when a stray dog emerged from the bushes. It was skin and bones, and he could see it had a knot of bone where it’s leg had been broken. His heart broke when he saw the strip of fabric binding its mouth shut. He took out his burger and tore it in half, holding it out to coax the dog over. He’d gotten two burgers, cause he’d figured he might as well get one to save for later. Giving up half of one wasn’t a big deal.

“That’s it, that’s good, right over here.” When the dog was close enough, he slowly reached out to untie it. It shied away. “It’s okay, I’m not gonna hurt you, you’re safe.”

It retreated; he stayed still, moving with the slow deliberation he had learned so well, so many years ago.

Eventually he managed to get close enough to begin gingerly removing the fabric. “You didn’t do anything to deserve this, did you? Who would do this to a poor little thing like you?” The dog spooked a few more times, but he was patient. He knew what it was like, seeing everything through a lens of pain and terror.

The last knot was too tight to untie, he’d have to use his pocket knife. The dog retreated again at the sight of it, it took at least fifteen minutes to calm her down enough to cut the fabric. “Shit, it’s okay. Good girl, you’re a girl, right? Yeah, it’s over, good job.” He gave her the half of his burger. That wasn’t much, she’d probably die out here soon, with the broken leg and all. Something in him couldn’t bear that thought. Maybe it was just because she reminded him of himself when he was a kid. In that case he was probably just a narcissistic bastard, but he still wanted to help her. There he went again, not giving a damn about the people who loved him and then dropping everything to help a mutt. “Well, us mutts have to look out for each other, huh?” His therapist would be mad at him for calling himself a mutt again, but honestly at this point he’d rather be one than whatever he was right now. She hesitantly eased down beside him. He smiled and reached out as if asking her if it was okay to pet her. She didn’t move away. “Aw, thanks for sticking around. You’re not scared of me, are you?”

That’s why he loved animals so much, they treated him like a normal human being. Not a victim, not a freak, not a pathetic man child, just another friend. He jolted when he heard someone yelling.

“Where the hell is that damn dog!”

He panicked, he couldn’t leave her here, not with Sh—whoever that was. He took the other half and used it to lead her into his car. “What the hell are you doing with my dog?” She started growling, he shut the door before she could jump out.

“Your dog? I don’t—I don’t see a collar.” Come on, don’t stutter now, get a grip. “I’m taking her to a shelter.”

“I paid good money for that thing!”

“Well then you should have had enough money to feed her.”

“She’s a beast, keeps trying to bite me, she’ll attack you too.”

“She seemed perfectly sweet until you showed up,” he glared, “I used to live with a man like you, believe me, I know a violent son of a bitch when I see one.”

“You little—I could break you like a toothpick, you damn twink.”

“And I—“ He pulled out his pocket knife. “—could stab you.”

“Fine, take the mutt. Don’t come crying to me when she tears a chunk of whatever flesh you’ve got off,” the man turned and walked away.

Conner got in the car and locked the doors. He rested his head against the steering wheel. His knuckles were white gripping it, he was shaking. Come on, breathe, in and out; calm down. That’s not Shane, he’s not going to hurt you. After a few minutes he’d finally calmed down enough to drive.

“That was scary, huh? Yeah, it’s okay now though, you’re safe,” he reached back behind his seat to pet her, then turned the ignition and drove away.

…

He pulled into the parking lot at his apartment complex and checked to see that the coast was clear before hurriedly leading the dog into his apartment with half of his second burger. He technically wasn’t supposed to bring animals inside, and talking to people wasn’t a fun time even when he wasn’t breaking any rules.

“I’m an idiot for doing this, you know that right?” He shut the door and fed her the half, then took out his half and slumped into the solitary beanbag chair that was the only furniture in his living room besides a tv and some boxes. “Welp, welcome to the hobbit hole. It’s not much but it works well enough I guess, not that you care, cause you’re a dog…yeah.” She sniffed at the last bite in his hand. “Hey now, leave me some okay? I gave you three quarters, let me have this,” he laughed.

He spent the rest of the evening without incident. Video games, a bit of mindless cleaning, checking the fridge even though he knew nothing was in there. He knew he had to take her outside, but he didn’t have any more food to coax her with. He reluctantly grabbed the bit of rope he kept in a little box in his closet and went to tie it around her neck.

“Hey…I’m sorry about this, I just need to take you outside, okay? I wish I didn’t have to…” he felt sick as he tied it, he did it as loose as possible. “There we go, it won’t be long, ‘kay? I’ll—I’ll do it to myself after, to make it up.”

He led her outside, silently praying she didn’t hate him for this, going slowly to make sure he didn’t tug on her. It was well after midnight at this point, so there wasn’t that much risk in being seen. It was a beautiful night, a cool breeze cut through the oppressive summer heat. The nighttime was the loveliest time to him; cooler, quiet, no one to bother him. It didn’t feel as lonely, cause being alone was natural at night. Even so, tonight wasn’t lonely at all, tonight he had a friend.

He headed back inside when a car with blaring music pulled into the parking lot and a couple of drunk kids his age piled out. He slipped back into his apartment just as they reached the stairs, shutting the door just a bit too hard. The dog jumped. “Sorry,” he winced. He took the rope off of the dog’s neck and tied it around his own. “There, we’re even.”

He watched some tv for a bit, wadded a pair of his socks into a ball and threw it for her for a while. He wondered what he’d do about all this tomorrow, probably tell his mom about her. He wasn’t looking forward to that conversation. Finally, he climbed in bed. She jumped up on the foot of it. He crawled down to sleep at the foot of the bed with her; sleeping with her at his feet felt too weird.

[listieshadows]

Listie says some words about every new movie she saw in July 2023 that she hadn't seen before

Eh, why not? I may as well say a few words about every movie I saw last month that I hadn't already seen before (at least according to the spreadsheet I've been keeping up with since February 2017). So, here we go—below the cut, of course, since this is gonna really run long.

(A note from right before I posted this: I actually kind of underestimated how long this would be when I started writing this, oh my goodness. This is 22 films I said words about down there.)

Indiana Jones And The Dial Of Destiny (2023)

Date seen: 2023-07-02

I'll admit I liked this one more coming out of the theater than I do now, so many days removed from it. Back when I made my Indiana Jones ranking post, I ranked it dead in the middle, as worse than Last Crusade and better than Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull, but, honestly? I think I might like Crystal Skull a it better than this, actually?

Of course, I might change my mind again if I ever re-watch it, but... I don't know. I can't exactly pinpoint anything specific about it. There's not even nitpicks I can point to to make a mountain-out-of-a-molehill deal out of like everyone did back when Crystal Skull was released.

And, actually, maybe it is just that Dial doesn't have any big, goofy, unbelievable movie serial/B-movie moments like any of the others did. For the most part, it is kind of just a Fast & Furious spectacle with some tomb raiding thrown in there. And when we do get that big moment... Somehow, in a franchise where aliens have already happened, this still seems like a small step too far?

I don't know. I'm not gonna declare it the worst film of 2023 like I'm sure some other people already have, because I did enjoy my time in the theater. I didn't start to wonder two-thirds of the way through "Maybe this isn't good, actually?" like I did SHAZAM! Fury Of The Gods. I'unno. At any rate, this still feels like a better adventure for Jones to bow out on than Crustal Skull. At least until they deepfake Harrison Ford for a sixth film, anyway.

Nimona (2023)

Date seen: 2023-07-03

Jeez, and I'd thought that Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse would the best 2023 film I'd see all year. Like, I knew Nimona would be good, but I didn't expect it to hit me as hard as it can. It legitimately made me cry, which, despite how much my mom teases me about it, is not something I do that often.

It really is incredible to me that Disney left this movie to die when they shut down Blue Sky, but they still let The Ice Age Adventures Of Buck Wild happen. And, gawd, I thought it was a slap in the face before, because it seemed like the only thing Disney wanted to do with Blue Sky was milk the dead cow that is the Ice Age franchise even further (I haven't even seen the Scratt shorts)... And, really, if Blue Sky hadn't been closed down, its biggest crime is that it would've been boring, and potentially pointless if the Buck Wild TV series that this movie was obviously a pilot for never happened.

But in the wake of Nimona's release, The Ice Age Adventures Of Buck Wild is even worse, because Nimona, no doubt, would've been Blue Sky's best movie. Maybe even better than The Peanuts Movie. And that just makes it all the more tragic that Blue Sky was closed before they could finally hit their creative stride.

Also, Nimona ended the same way that Spider-Man: Homecoming did, and part of me's grateful that it did, 'cuz I actually would've been bawling for the next hour or so if it didn't, and I had other shit to do, so...

Mission: Impossible III (2006)

Date seen: 2023-07-03

At the start of July I was in the middle of watching all of the Mission: Impossible movies into the lead-up to Dead Reckoning Part One (more on that later!), and of course this is the last of the "original trilogy," as I like to think of it, before they went from spy thrillers to Jackie Chan stunt spectaculars.

And, honestly, of all of the films, this might be my least favorite?

Like, I'unno, in general, I prefer the more stunt-focused flicks to these, but even besides that... I just really didn't take to it? Like, the first one does the spy stuff the best, I think, and then the sequel is stupid, enjoyable John Woo nonsense. But this? It's the one I'd return to the least.

I mean, maybe I'm just pissed that they never told me what the hell the Rabbit's Foot was.

Independence Day (1996)

Date seen: 2023-07-04

I don't have much to say about this one, really. It's just stupid, popcorn fun. Like, yeah, it's overly jingoistic, but Will Smith punches out an alien and a whole shit-ton of miniatures blow up. Come on, that's entertainment.

I mean, at any rate, I enjoyed watching this movie more than Anonymous. At least this movie didn't put forward any Anti-Stratfordian conspiracy theories.

Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation (2015)

Date watched: 2023-07-08

Surprisingly, this was the only one of the "latter trilogy" that I hadn't seen before this year. I'm not entirely sure why. I mean, I believe all three were available to me when I watched Ghost Protocol and Fallout, so I can't exactly figure out why it took me this long.

And big surprise, it's as much of a fun, thrilling spy action stunt spectacular as the other two. I wasn't expecting anything less.

Part of me kind of feels like these three are sort of interchangeable—like, if you wanna watch a spy movie where Tom Cruise risks his life being very high up in the air, you'd be fine with any of these. Of course, that's ignoring the actual stories, and I'm not saying they're bad in calling them interchangeable. Just that, in the future, if I were to try and figure out which one to watch, I'd have a hard time 'cuz they're all so equally good.

Maybe I'd just make it easy and put on Mission: Impossible 2, I'unno.

Spinout (1966)

Date watched: 2023-07-10

I've already talked about this movie in a previous post, so I'll just direct you there if you wanna hear my thoughts about it. Y'know, if you're really dying to find out what some random user on Tumblr thinks about Elvis's twentieth-some movie.

The Transformers: The Movie (1986)

Date watched: 2023-07-15

I plan to watch all of the Transformers movie this August, so I figured I may as well take the time to watch the original flick. Which, really, let's be honest, mostly served just to wipe most of the previous cast away so they could promote new toys.

I didn't not enjoy this movie, don't get me wrong, but obviously I didn't get as much out of it as I could have. Like, if I were a kid in the 80's, or if I were deeply invested in the cartoon, or if I didn't know that Optimus comes back, dies and comes back in the season of the show following this movie. Mostly, I just wanted to hear Eric Idle and Orson Welles, watch some robots beat up other robots, listen to one of the characters say "Aw, shit!" and devour the film's gloriously cheesy 80's soundtrack, which even includes Weird Al's "Dare To Be Stupid". And I got all that, so...

My friend Aylo didn't like it when I said that Hot Rod is partially responsible for Optimus Prime's death, but, hey, I just call 'em like I see 'em. Also, I mistook Hot Rod for Wheelie, and I wanted to perpetuate those allegations just to spite Wheelie.

Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023)

Date watched: 2023-07-16

I mean this in the best way possible—this movie frustrated the shit out of me. I just wanted Ethan to keep a hold on that damn key, but it just kept on getting yoinked out of his hands by some damn pickpocket or whoever. And, like, I mean it in the best way because that does mean I was invested in what was going on enough to care, but gaaaawd, how is this the person Ethan's had the most trouble with?

This movie's portrayal of A.I. is exactly what both A.I. evangelists and doomsayers clam it will be.

The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984)

Date watched: 2023-07-18

Is this what all superhero movies feel like to people who aren't deeply invested in them? 'Cuz I found it pretty dang enjoyable if it is.

Also, I accidentally learned why that watermelon was there, and it bums me out because I liked the mystery way more.

Ruthless People (1986)

Date watched: 2023-07-20

This is a fine black comedy, but certainly not the best Zucker/Abrams/Zucker. I mean, literally, the only times I remembered that they directed this was the opening credits and the closing credits. In-between? I'unno, maybe I was just too distracted by Danny DeVito to remember.

And, yes, I did watch this movie entirely because its title song was the subject of Weird Al's only miss in parodying a hit, "Toothless People". Indeed, it really isn't even the best parody on the album. Not even "Addicted To Spuds" is right there with the line "Some tater tots would blow your mind!"

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret Of The Ooze (1991)

Date watched: 2023-07-20

The second part of my preparation for the upcoming Turtles movie this August, and... I don't think it's that much worse than the first, honestly? Clearly not as good, of course, but I'd give it a thumbs up.

This movie reminds me a lot of Ghostbusters II, where the tone was lightened up quite a bit from the first film because there was a franchise and a Saturday morning cartoon all the little kids were into. Now, true, the Turtles were already a franchise and cartoon beforehand, so it's not a 100% accurate comparison, but you get what I mean. After the first film, which was based more on the original comics, proved to be a success, the sequel was made to fit in better with how most people knew the TMNT.

But, again, I don't think it's a total downgrade. I can still take this mostly seriously, even with some of the dumber lines and moments. And at least we still have the Henson costumes. Can't argue with those.

Really, the only part that absolutely stunk was the anti-climax of Super Shredder. Like, even the appearance of Vanilla Ice got a laugh of me because... Come on, it's Vanilla Ice. What else was I supposed to do?

Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut (2006)

Date watched: 2023-07-22

I watched this to celebrate the one-year anniversary of me watching all of the Superman movies I hadn't seen before (which meant "literally all of them except the DCEU two"), and in the intermediate time I've seen a lot of other movies, so I can't exactly tell you how this cut stacks up to the original, but... It's Superman II. It's the best of all of 'em. Can't argue with it.

I don't think you should watch this over the theatrical cut, but if you're curious to see how Donner would've cut it, I say go for it.

And, hey, 'know, this didn't cost Warner Bros. millions like that other time they let someone recut one of their DC movies (and, yes, thank you, I do refuse to watch it—or the original for that matter).

But so we don't go to the next film on that note, I wanna confess that the only thing I noticed different from the original cut was when I thought, "Hey, waitaminute—that shot where Superman blows a woman's skirt up wasn't there before."

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993)

Date watched: 2023-07-23

Any enjoyment I got out of this you could credit way more to James Rolfe than you can the film itself. If it weren't for his old review, I wouldn't've laughed nearly as much at the bad lines, poor special effects, terrible costumes, stupid story, and just the utterly bone-headed decision to have the Turtles time travel to early 17th-century Japan.

Well, at least it's not the worst thing to feature that subway lair set—though it's not exactly a compliment to say that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III is only barely better than Ninja Turtles: The Next Mutation.

The Flash (2023)

Date watched: 2023-07-24

I wanna state upfront that nobody made a dime off of me watching this. The only thing I wasted here was my time.

So. The Flash.

You ever watch something just to be able to call it the worst thing you've seen all year?

Seriously, if the film hadn't stopped dead in its tracks in the middle of the climax to shove poorly rendered CGi fanservice in our face, it would have been fine. Maybe slightly better than SHAZAM! Fury Of The Gods. But that one extended moment is so crassly cynical, I think it caused "multiverse fatigue" all by itself, and I can't imagine myself willingly seeing anything worse this year.

Literally the best part was just the opening logos, and the fact that the movie quotes "Barbie Girl" really pissed me off, because that meant it tied directly into the next movie I saw.

Barbie (2023)

Date watched: 2023-07-24

I remember when I first heard that there was going to be a live-action Barbie movie, I was really skeptical. Like this was Mattel looking at the success of The LEGO Movie years ago and decided to shit out something in the vein of, like, The Smurfs or whatever.

Never would I have imagined that, years later, I'd be one of many people sitting in the theater audience wearing pink.

Absolutely lived up to the hype and how insane the trailers made it look. I couldn't have asked for anything better. Gawd bless.

You go live your best life, Alan.

Hatching Pete (2009)

Date watched: 2023-07-25

This is another one of those DCOMs I've seen ahead of the podcast Escape From Vault Disney—which is the only kind of DCOM I see, for the record—and, well, on a scale of "Does this feature a man in a chicken suit committing grand theft auto?", it's so far the best one.

In another universe, "Hatching Pete" is the title of a trans coming out story.

Elvis: That's The Way It Is (1970)

Date watched: 2023-07-26

Now this is what I wanted from an Elvis film—Elvis on stage singing his ass off, doing flailing karate moves, messing around with his band, finding time to kiss every woman in the audience, and deepthroating his microphone. Fun times!

TMNT (2007)

Date watched: 2023-07-26

Maybe the best Turtles film since the first one? I'unno, maybe if it had a plot I could give a hoot about, because Winters and all of the everything he was doing was just not doing it for me.

But, hey, at least I got to look at good looking CGi Turtles one more time before... Urgh. The next two.

Inception (2007)

Date watched: 2023-07-27

Oh, so that's why everybody uses "-ception" as a suffix. Neat! And the rest of the movie's real good, too.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2007)

Date watched: 2023-07-28

I wouldn't say this is as bad as Turtles III—I mean, it keeps the characters in New York, but that's the lowest possible bar for it to clear, and it certainly doesn't cross into being good.

It's such a strange decision to have the movie focus so centeredly on April, but I guess it's for the better we don't spend as much time as we could have being forced to focus on creeper Mikey.

Oppenheimer (2023)

Date watched: 2023-07-30

Lemme say up front that this is a good movie. A very good movie. Maybe one of Nolan's best—I haven't seen enough of his work to say for sure, but from what I've read, it's a very good candidate not only for Nolan's best, but maybe even best of the year. And certainly, this is absolutely a film that needs to be seen in theaters. There are moments in here I can't imagine just watching on a TV or phone.

And I bring all this preface just to say that if anyone sees this film rank towards the middle of my 2023 film ranking, it's because, honestly, if it weren't for the whole "Barbenheimer" phenomenon, I don't think I would've gone out of my way to see it, at least not in theaters. I'm sure I still would've had some interest in this film (largely because of the Epic Rap Battle where Oppenheimer battled Thanos), but not enough to go out of my way like this.

Also, lemme jus' say that, yeah, I agree with Issa Rae; I am a bit of psychopath for seeing this late. Didn't hit me until a few hours after I'd left the theater, but, yeah; shit could mess you up if you let it.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out Of The Shadows (2016)

Date watched: 2023-07-31

I guess it's better than the first—I mean, credit for addressing issues like how pointless splitting Shredder into two characters was and for actually giving the Turtles character focus, and for adding in elements that fans had no doubt waited forever to see, like Krang and Be-Bop and Rocksteady—but it's still not that great.

Seriously, could they not get Krang on set for more than two days? He's a big brain alien with a mustache for some reason; he can't be that busy!

[catgirl-catboy]

@crowssoul2

Tumblr was bitching about the formatting of this, so new post!

Behold: the plot of the prologue and Ch1 of my fanganronpa.

Our protagonist is the SHSL Seer. Like Hiro, but legit. Nobody knows where her powers come from in-universe, and half of the cast actively suspects her of either being some kind of supergenius or causing the shit she foresees. She doesn't really see the point of coming to HPA, since there's no way to train her powers and someone else could use the spot more. But her mom wanted her to, so… Also, she's punk and has piercings and short hair.

The gimmick is that all of the SHSLs come from different parts of the world, and get flown in. The planes are sabotaged and explode as soon as everyone gets off.

She meets a boy that knows nothing about himself. When asked if she has any idea of who he is, the only thing that comes to her is that he's fatally allergic to peanuts. Helpful, but not exactly informative. (similar to Sora, but he isn't an AI I promise!) In case she sees more information, he decides to follow her around.

The other Ults they meet: Two SHSL figure skaters (they are pairs skaters!), a SHSL camp counselor, a SHSL conductor (the musical kind!), a SHSL Art Forger, a SHSL conspiracy theorist, a SHSL competitive eater, a SHSL wedding planner, and more!

Our support and antagonist kind of switch places, its complicated. But in the prologue, as follows are the SHSL Valedictorian and the SHSL Stalker. The two of them are childhood friends and shared a plane. Everyone has heard of Val, and gets compared to her. Meanwhile, Stalker's alias is kind of infamous for exposing corruption and working for the highest bidder. However, it wasn't known that Stalker comes from two generations of Ults before her. (Stalker also uses he/she pronouns. One of them had to have my gender.)

Nothing happens, so counselor decides to have a campfire while waiting for help. There's a nice moment of everyone getting along. Then, Monokuma appears! Monokuma says that help won't be coming unless you kill each other, and that suitcases are delivered to their rooms. He also says that if nobody kills to escape, everyone will starve. Did I steal this motive from another, maybe! :) But its fun, so!

Val says they should spend the day searching. Its clear that she and Counselor have good leadership potential, while Stalker shows he doesn't take orders from the group, but is also very proficient with technology. (Its how he gets most of his information!)

Counselor decides to take a risk and climb over the electric fence that surrounds the airport. He doesn't make it, and gets bad burns on his hands in the process. (Counselor got his position because he managed to save a bunch of lives in a bear attack, and has a hero complex as a result.) He's injured throughout the rest of the game.

The group plans to keep all of the food in one place, but Stalker will not have it and demands her share upfront. She points out that if someone steals the food, or destroys it, she'd have nothing. Emboldened by her choice, several others including Val and Theorist follow her.

Others are annoyed that he prevented the group from working together, and didn't take a room to search while people divided them up. (instead, he gave information that Monokuma was likely controlled from a nearby location and about small blind spots the cameras have.)

In addition to what the group finds in the wing of the airport (there's a security with a statistically improbable amount of confiscated weapons), the class has whatever they brought in their suitcases, so long as it isn't a computer or other banned item. Amnesiac has nothing. (bitchy Stalker noises.)

Val wants to bury all of the weapons the group was given, but Stalker points out that would be pointless since almost everyone has something that could be used as a weapon anyways. He also admits to carrying a knife, which stresses the group out.

After a couple of days of nothing, the group food stash goes missing!

People blame Stalker, since she called it might happen while demanding food. She points out that if she planned on stealing food, she wouldn't have pointed out the possibility. Nobody believes her, since she's fatally blunt and does shit like that. (one of the major things that everyone hates her for is that she is actively trying to get along with Monokuma, and asking if this killing game was inspired by [X horror movie]?) So everyone (including Stalker) look for the food, but with no luck.

The group then demands those who hid their food to share it, with Val giving some, Theorist giving half, and Stalker flat out refusing.

A few more days pass, and the situation is getting dire.

People are complaining, while Stalker rolls his eyes and tells them they aren't starving yet. Wedding planner has had enough, and is chewing Stalker out about this. Valedictorian stays silent throughout this whole thing, but clearly feels conflicted. (Stalker is the people pleaser of the century, and is channeling Togami hard early game.)

Eventually, the body of the SHSL competitive eater is found slumped over airport security. He has bruises, but the fatal blow was a head injury. Stalker is,,, creepily calm about this, and immediately starts examining the body.

Everyone comes when the BDA rings except one of the NPCs. Eventually, they find them dead in their room of strangulation.

When the Monokuma files are given out, it is revealed that Competitive Eater died during the big argument everyone had, so everyone in it has an alibi. NPC died ~an hour earlier.

Then there's all of the intricate shit a murder case requires, but the important character driven details are: - Theorist actively hinders the group by coming up with off the wall theories like the victims not actually being dead, or the murder weapon being the missing food. - Missing food never turns up, despite them suspecting the food thief for most of the trial. - Val goes batshit insane when delivered a challenge, and single handedly wants to carry the trial. She's also incredibly smart. - Conductor (who is mute, and communicates via the monopad) is spoken over during trials due to tts being slow, which is a shame because he has good points. - Stalker is the other MVP of the trial, but has a tendency to overthink things. (At one point, he suspects the body was moved solely due to a lack of blood, instead of the killer attempting to clean up.) - The Male Pairs Skater is talked over by the Female one, and the two of them tend to disagree. (Not exactly like the twins, when its more introvert and extrovert dynamic rather than abuser and victim. He's just not as confident.) - Everyone listens to Seer due to her talent. Seer lowkey hates this, since she feels like she doesn't have as good of an idea of the case. - It is revealed that Stalker, who seemed like a very "only in it for himself" kind of person, gave half of her food to Val without Val knowing. When asked, says its because she doesn't like people owing her shit, and that it'd take a lot longer than this to die of starvation. - Eventually, it is revealed that the Competitive Eater killed the NPC, and then attacked someone who stumbled in on the cleanup. I imagine this'd be easy for players to metagame from Sayaka and Leon, but it stumps the players.

Due to the method of cleanup on Eater's body, the Art Forger comes under suspicion. This is a surprise, since everyone thought she was a bit of an airhead up to this point. (its revealed in her FTEs that the reason she knows nothing about real life is that she had a shitty father that never let her out of the house. Also, she doesn't know thats not normal.)

It was revealed to be an accident, she just meant to throw him away from her, but his head hit the security bench and he died.

She didn't even know about the other murder, she thought it was a random attack.

(another tangent, in my version Monokuma says its possible to survive every execution, and that blackeneds should try. It never happens.)

The whole group is giving her advice on how she could survive, and hoping for the best.

Then Stalker opens his fucking mouth, and gives a

"I don't blame for for the murder. That was a complete accident. But, the moment you tried to clean up that body, you put your life before the rest of ours. As a result, I hate you. Live or die on your own terms, it has nothing to do with me"

to EVERYONES DISBELIEF.

The execution is Monokuma tying the Art Forger down and slowly forcing paint down her throat until she throws up her stomach explodes. She's crying, its gruesome.

You might think this doesn't have a lot to do with her talent, and that'll actually become relevant to the plot later!

[ember-da-toon]

I just wanted to get this off my chest today,,,

This is a vent post so scroll on by, you don't need to read all this,

Okay, anyway tomorrow will be my last day of school before the holidays and I move up a grade. I've been skipping school the whole week and I'm contemplating on whether I should go or not.

If I go, there's really not much I can do tbh. The teachers aren't going to teach us anything and I'll (unfortunately) be seeing you again next year anyway because apparently we're gonna have the same teachers as last years. And just when I thought being in the middle of a group of K-Pop fans everyday was bad enough, apparently not because most of my teachers aren't the best at teaching. Like, my maths teacher, he had been absent for at least like what, 40% of last year and he crammed all the subjects into an hour every maths period. And my history and religion teacher has been bitches the whole uear too because of course they were.

Aside from just being bored the whole morning, it probably would be better if I weren't at home.

See, my parents had been giving me and my siblings the silent treatment for the whole week and I don't remember why. It was most likely over a small matter but still, thy do the typical stuff like take away the laptop or do the dishes aggressively. I've been skipping dinner with them because why the fuck would I want to be around them in the first place? I've snuck downstairs at around 1 or 2 am even to grab a quick bite from some peanut butter or something before I go back to sleep.

I can't get anything done without my motivation being drowned out by their bad vibes. I can't draw, I can't study properly and I can't just do chores without feeling forced despite them not telling me to.

I- I don't know what to do anymore. Nothing I do apeases them anymore, it's never enough, I feel like I never will be. Not with my grades, not with my face and not even being a good example as the oldest sibling.

This week has taken a toll on my mental health lately and I've been contemplating on running away to my friend's house. They said that even their mom would adopt me just to help me get away from them. Their mom thinks my mom is weird too and I'm glad someone else thinks so too. I want to run away so badly.

But I don't have any money, I don't have my bank account yet because they still have a hold of it and I doubt they'll give it to me by the end of the year. How can I make money when I don't have the resources, equipment nor support in general I need. It's not my fault that I am more passionate about art than in science, I love escaping into fantasy books, I love weird, quirky and kooky shit. Why? Because I was raised by TV and an iPad. They left me with it and my grandma and nanny as I explored the internet with no boundaries. I want to leave this house and live with my grandma and aunt in another state. I don't even want to go to college or uni, it's pointless, I'll never get into any, no matter how hard I try....

[ramossalling70]

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[peanutscratch]

Came out to my mom, but more idk officially this time. Felt good! I kind of think I should do this more every once in a while just so it gets easier to talk about.

But that might just be cuz I've bottled it up in front of the parents for 5 years about.

I guess I felt like I should have idk "figured something out" before I talked to them about it again

Ultimately I think it's something of a wall that I built up more in my brain than in real life

But Hey

You live and you learn

[nedlittle]

my most vivid memory of the whole living abroad during a global pandemic thing was calling my mother in tears at 4 in the morning, mid hysterical breakdown to tell her that i watched paddington 2 on the plane, then her saying in the absolute nicest voice possible "they had paddington 2 on the plane? did your stuffed paddington get to watch?"

[eliasbouchardsgender]

.

[botanyshitposts]

I followed you because your posts were all fun and really cool but my what a gift your tags are!!! I always want to reblog posts with your tags still there lol 😊🌱

i’ve gotten a lot of messages about my tags and like honestly i’m just glad that people are enjoying my peanut gallery content just as much as my actual content lmao