#portrays a mother's emotions so well

[shehsart]

Anyways REI TODOROKI: one of the best written female characters I've seen in a long time and very VERY refreshing take from how shounen usually tackles women. It either kills the mother figure or leaves her existence a mystery. Or just one inspirational quote for the protagonist's power up but no. But here we have Rei guys, she's over 40, freaking gorgeous, mother to a hero and a villain. Doesn't need to be brash or violent to show she's powerful. Went through extremely harsh abuse the worst kind imaginable but came out stronger. Tiny but resilient. Spent 11 years of her life at a mental hospital, sees her son reveal to the public that he's a mass murderer and instead of breaking down she goes to confront her abusive husband about it (again he was so triggering for her) Rei who's words made Shoto want to be a hero despite the negative outlook Enji gave him about heroes. Sees dabi's inferno which is so hot people are told not to even look that way but she rides a robot towards it and runs into it even when she has zero resistance to flames. Rei who's still guilty about Touya blaming her back when he was 13. Endeavour not being able to do anything about it but Rei's quick actions delay the explosion until Shoto arrives. Thank you Horikoshi for giving her character closure. Rei todoroki the most woman ever.

[markantonys]

i have spilled so much ink about gawyn but really i only need 2 passages to explain why he is Like That

1. My blood shed before hers; my life given before hers...That was the oath he had taken when barely tall enough to peer into Elayne's cradle. ... Gareth Bryne had had to explain to him what it meant, but even then he had known he had to keep that oath if he failed at everything else in his life. (LOC prologue)

2. From Morgase, Queen of Andor, to her beloved son, Gawyn. May he be a living sword for his sister and Andor. (ACOS prologue)

like yeah, no wonder he does what he does in AMOL. people will be like "gawyn is so stupid for not thinking about the fact that his death would hurt egwene" as if he's being maliciously stupid and careless, when in fact, he has such little self-worth that he genuinely does not consider himself a valuable human being whose loss would impact anyone or anything. his life given before hers. a living sword. this has been his mindset since toddlerhood and nobody ever noticed it enough to try and counteract it. gawyn is exactly what rand would have been like at the last battle if he hadn't had a mental health intervention.

[agnesandhilda]

I am a strong supporter of the "kaiser fixates on his mother as an actress/on other troubled female celebrities" concept on the basis of him having mommy issues as well of him being flamboyantly queer and drawn to femininity

[anthromimicry]

OH, speaking of misao, while i'm still here... let me talk about how she was introduced to playing instruments + why she still does it often to this day. as you may know, misao's mother — kaiyah — did suffer from mental health issues, and in ancient japan... they were very behind in terms of providing the appropriate care to those who had mental health concerns. while doing research on it, i also discovered that it was also unfortunately HEAVILY stigmatized and thought of to be caused by spirits and/or brought about by spiritual means. and so kaiyah would often have to find ways to try to help herself cope with her symptoms; one of which turned out to be music. and misao remembers which instrument kaiyah used to play vividly because listening to her play music, as well as sing, was one of the ways that they'd bond despite them having a rather complicated relationship. kaiyah used to play the biwa, which is a plucked string instrument that sort of resembles a guitar and whenever she'd play, kaiyah would sit cross-legged. and this wasn't only because that was the traditional way to play the biwa, but so that misao could sit in her lap as she strummed the instrument. and misao also remembers kaiyah just looking at her with this look that was just made up of pure happiness during those moments. which, although they were very ephemeral, kind of helped her pull through her childhood because they gave her hope that maybe she could be like this all the time at first; and then upon discovering that although that might not be the most realistic thing to think... it helped her pull through because she would believed that she rather hold onto whatever scrap of happiness she could get, rather than try to forget these experiences with her mother, because of the fact that they hurt her so badly emotionally sometimes. and this was because she wanted to help kaiyah the same way that music seemed to — she just didn't know how. but as the years passed, misao came up with the idea that maybe learning to play it could be a method in which she could assist kaiyah with feeling more... at peace, i guess you could say, and so she did.

though misao only got to play the biwa for her mother a few times before ryu was born, and whenever that happened, everything changed. but of course... none of it was his fault. all those good feelings that misao had associated with the biwa now had a sort of bitter taste to them because of kaiyah's neglect towards ryu and once more, although this conflict was a lot more nuanced than it might've appeared because of her mother's illness, misao felt this strong urge to just completely smash her biwa into pieces because she felt so bad inside. though, honestly, misao is glad that she didn't today. because it honestly is one of the few things that she still has around that reminds her of kaiyah, and although she literally cannot play it because the last time she did, misao just sobbed all the way through it — she was able to pick up another instrument that vaguely reminded her of the biwa and allowed her to reconnect with that old part of herself: which would be the guitar. but it is a very private part of herself that she doesn't reveal to a lot of people. she'll really only play the guitar around people she really trusts, as whenever she's playing it, it's almost like she's playing to her mother again.

[decayedhearts]

@soothsaer​ sent:   💭 + trey + trauma   [Send me a “💭“ and your Muse will experience one of my muse’s Memories]

A sweet scent suddenly fills your nose and then you’re carried away on a cloud of cinnamon and apple, the school disappearing from your eyes and changing into a place you’ve never seen before..

It’s the big kitchen in the back of the bakery, the one where most of the baking happens. There’s a smaller area in the shop part too where some minor cake and cookie decorating is done, but that’s your father’s job and you’ve never helped him out there. Not yet. Some day you’ll be allowed to take over there as well. If you’re honest, it makes you nervous to think about - what if you mess up while people are watching? All that money wasted if you have to give it away for free (because who will buy messed up cake?), or worse, all that food wasted if mother decides to throw it away. Maybe you could sneak it out of the kitchen and give it to your sister, pretend you failed it on purpose so she could have some sweeties before bedtime. She’d probably like that.

“Trey, honey? Be careful not to let the dough dry up,” mother’s voice pulls you from your thoughts. You look at the lump of dough you’ve been kneading and nod. “Yes, mum,” you promise, poking the soft mass with your fingers to see if it’s starting to crack. It’s still okay, but if you’re not careful, it’ll dry up like mother said. You’ve done this often enough by now to recognize its stages, you shouldn’t make mistakes like that anymore.

You start splitting the dough into smaller pieces, rolling little balls and placing them on the counter. They all need to be the same size or else the finished buns won’t turn out the same, some will burn while the others are still raw, and you won’t have time to check them all individually. There’s so much left to do for tomorrow and you’re already getting sleepy. You hear the front door opening, the familiar jingle of the bell distracting you for a moment, but you stay focused on your task. There was a time where you’d drop what you’re holding and run to greet father, but that time is past. “Your father is back,” mother says and smiles at you. No, she looks sad. No.. she is smiling. She leaves the room and closes the door behind her.

You make more dough balls but you lose count of them as you place them on the counter. The sound of the clock ticking on the wall is so loud it feels as though it should make the loose flour vibrate on the counter’s surface. You hear their voices in the other room. They’re loud just normal, but you can’t make up any words. Mother is crying laughing about something. Maybe father told a joke; he used to do that a lot when you were little. Well, when you were younger, you are still little, compared to him.

You’re still counting by the time mother comes back, but the numbers are all jumbled in your head. Maybe it’s 15, or maybe it’s 49. Mother is quiet and so are you, your small whispered counting just loud enough for her to recognize you’re still doing it. You need her to know that, you’re not sure why, but the thought of her asking if you overheard them makes your stomach ache. You heard nothing.      “I’m done, mother,” you say out loud and turn to find your mum sitting on her chair by the window, her hand on her round belly. She’s in tears. Again. There is flour on her cheek and before you know you move to wipe it away, your small hand coming away damp.

And then she’s hugging you, holding you so tight it hurts a little, your small chest unable to take in breath like it should. You don’t remember the last time she hugged you to comfort you. You haven’t asked her to in a while. It wouldn’t feel like comfort from someone so broken. She’s whispering words into your ear that you don’t want to hear, words you choose not to understand. If you don’t understand them, maybe they won’t be true.

The bakery needs to stay afloat so you can keep the house and pay the bills, that much you understand. “I’ll help, mum,” you say, while your chest still hurts. You wish she would let go of you already. You already messed up so much, almost caused them to lose it all at the hands of a wrathful woman with a heart of stone. Irresponsible. The bakery needs to stay afloat so he won’t leave, you already messed up so much--- the bakery needs to stay afloat or she will go away too. You’re all she has, of course you’ll help. If you’ll help everything will turn out fine, the bakery will stay, father will stay, your sister will be fine and the baby--

The memory breaks off with a snap, like a film tearing. 

[mxtxfanatic]

Bing-ge and Victim's Entitlement as Portrayed by MXTX

I was thinking about Bing-ge’s journey as an abuse victim into an abuser and how much the creation of Bing-mei is a critique on both the writing trope that creates Bing-ge as well as the societal expectations that drive it.

In the world of PIDW, one of Shen Yuan’s main critiques was about how terribly the young Luo Binghe is treated by the narrative, so much so that he views it as torture porn. From being abandoned as a baby, to being abused as a servant and watching his adoptive mother wither from sickness and die, to finding his way to Cang Qiong Mountain and suffering under a cruel shizun who then pushes him into hell, Shen Yuan finds all this unnecessarily cruel. However, Shang Qinghua knows that the trauma Luo Binghe suffers directly correlates to the enjoyment readers are meant to get out of the second half of the protagonist’s life when he becomes overpowered and primed for vengeance. Shen Yuan knows this, too, as this is the trope he girds himself with as Shen Qingqiu to work up the nerve to push his disciple into the Endless Abyss, to “earn” his happiness. However, is this a true happiness? Does the trauma justify any and all of Luo Binghe’s actions?

On the surface, Bing-ge seems happy! He is able to enact revenge on Shen Jiu—and demolish Cang Qiong Mountain Sect who acted as accomplices to his abuse—and was given narrative access to any and every woman of marriageable age who crossed his path. He is even able to destroy his world by merging the three realms with no consequences to himself. Bing-ge has seemingly reaped the twisted “reward” that having survived unconscionable abuse and abandonment from the time of his birth had sown for him, and PIDW readers were able to enjoy and defend Bing-ge’s later megalomaniacal actions directly because they had read through hundreds of pages of his ill-treatment beforehand. The worse Luo Binghe’s childhood was, the more they were willing to accept of his actions in adulthood. We see a similar thing take place in the SVSSS fandom: the reveal of Shen Jiu’s past as a child slave is used to justify his later abuse of his child disciples—children who had no hand in his trauma but who he has decided to bear the brunt of it, anyways. But Shen Jiu lived a very unfulfilling adulthood due to his unwarranted actions until his untimely death. Is Luo Binghe any different?

Enter Bing-mei: the revised protagonist who abandons revenge in pursuit of experiencing genuine affection from the only person who gave it unconditionally. No, Bing-mei doesn’t get all the girls or all the power. He does not become the emperor of all three realms and he is not an uncontested leader that all conscious beings bow to. In fact, he is very tame and controlled in comparison to his PIDW counterpart despite not having complete control of his sword that amplifies his negative emotions. But when Bing-ge slips into the world of SVSSS and discovers that, despite all of this, Bing-mei has an intact world, platonic relationships, and a shizun who loves him, he’s willing to throw it all away to experience that same life. Bing-ge is revealed to be the unhappy, unfulfilled one, because the one thing he wanted—genuine unconditional love—was the one thing that he cannot earn or forcibly take. No amount of audience hype can change the fact that Bing-ge must leave behind the happy Bingqiu couple to return to his destroyed world in his unsatisfying reality.

This isn’t just a theme in SVSSS, either; it’s present in all of MXTX’s works in how people—both characters and the irl fandom—react to antagonists and asshole characters who have experienced trauma. In mdzs: a female cultivator tries to say that Jin Ling endangering other cultivators should be forgiven “since he’s an orphan.” Jiang Cheng throws his parents’ and sister’s death around to justify being an unrepentant serial killer. Jin Guangyao cries about how much his father hates him compared to the legitimate Jin heirs that he murdered. In tgcf: Qi Rong escapes discipline at every turn because his mother had to escape with him from his abusive father, and Mu Qing’s transgressions against the marginalized are ignored because “he was poor, once.” All of these characters have their actions whitewashed both in their stories and by their fandoms at large because their defenders believe that their trauma excuses any of their subsequent behavior.

Yet, MXTX does not prescribe to this idea. Notice the pattern of how the above characters end their stories. Jiang Cheng tanks his reputation and loses the respect of his only living relative. Jin Guangyao and Qi Rong die. But Jin Ling experiences setback after setback until he adjusts his behavior, and Mu Qing had to earnestly apologize under harrowing circumstances to be forgiven. It is not characters who seek justice for being harmed who are punished in these novels but those who persevere in their entitlement to do whatever they want because they were once harmed, thereby eventually destroy any goodwill others, particularly their loved ones, had towards them. The characters who are able to contain their actions to aim only at those who wronged them or else honestly reflect on their sense of entitlement in order to change for the better become well-liked by their peers. And as for Bing-ge: his inability to change within the narrative of PIDW may have “earned” him all the material things his world could offer and the affections of an unseen audience, besides, but he misses out on true human connection and love. These are the things he can never forcibly take, because in real life, no amount of trauma would entitle him—or anyone—to those things.

[in-class-daydreams]

i think what the anon actually meant when they said “incestuous” was if their relationship contained any EMOTIONAL incest on sen’s side?

when reading, sen does seem to have some form of emotionally incestuous feelings towards his mother but it doesn’t seem like the mother has those same feelings. whether he does have those feelings or not is entirely up to you.

this isn’t to say your writing is bad or anything. it’s actually very good and i thoroughly enjoy this au. i wouldn’t change a single thing about the way you write, especially when it comes to sen and his relationships.

there’s also nothing wrong with writing about emotional incest. it’s a very real thing and can happen in situations like the one in your au. as long as it isn’t romanticized or sexualized, it shouldn’t be a problem.

obviously, you don’t owe anyone an explanation but the people that are turned off by that impression might feel better with some clarification on the relationship.

(also, idk if you do emoji anons but if so, perhaps could i be 🦤?)

Emotionally, it sure seems that way, doesn't it? I've said he's weird, I've said he's a bit yandere about it, but I feel this is one of those things readers have to interpret themselves. Is his behavior appropriate? And regardless of the answer, can you (the general "you" not you specifically) sympathize with how he ended up that way? Did we expect a boy - burdened with great power from birth, plunged into an inherently flawed society - to turn out well-adjusted?

And I'm not blasting you in particular, this ask is very polite/constructive - especially compared to a lot of other asks I've gotten since this AU blew up - it's just that I write expecting readers to do some mental legwork on the more complex themes.

Take Nabokov's Lolita for example. It deals with some pretty gross and problematic subject matter, but Nabokov is expecting readers to be able to read between the lines that just because that inappropriate behavior is at the forefront of the novel, the actual message is that this sort of behavior is reprehensible. The average person isn't sitting there like, "Wow, these are all great ideas!"

This AU won't be everyone's cup of tea, and that's ok, because work portraying problematic themes has a right to exist, but in the same vein, people have the right not to read it.

~

Thank you so much for the ask!

Click [here] for more of Sen being mean to his dad | Ask stuff about Sen and the fam [here]

[heytherecentaurs]

Burrow's End is an absolute masterpiece.

In the span of ten episodes Aabria and Co. weave an exciting and emotional adventure story about a family of sentient stoats. It delivers huge laughs, interesting societal criticism, remarkably emotional and well-acted scenes and concludes with a series of epilogue scenes that feel appropriate for each character, some heartfelt and subdued and others bigger than life and all the funnier for it.

Siobhan and Izzy play the perfect pair of siblings. They fight and argue but they also love each other. Jaysohn (Siobhan) looks up to Lila (Izzy) and believes she's the smartest stoat in the world (and by the end she probably is) and Lila hypes up her little brother's athletic skills. They both fully embodied these kids and I could watch them do fun stuff for more episodes. Give me a version of Saved by the Bell with them. Stoat by the Bell.

Brennan and Rashawn, playing sisters, also knock it outta the park, showing a more mature sibling dynamic. Brennan portrays Tula as the quintessential overtired single mother of excitable kids, and Rashawn as younger sister Viola straddles a very interesting line of being intimidating to outsiders but very much more naive and looking to her older sister when she starts a family.

Jasper as Thorn, a guy everyone just lets be a cult leader because he really wanted to, is fantastic. His is a difficult role as the only non-blood relative. Jasper plays Thorn with such real humanity of a guy in over his head and letting his ambition wife call the shots, but also one who agrees with her goal, really loves her and has moments of real menace. He has some very funny scenes, his big speech is perfect, and I just enjoy him.

Erika is wonderful. They play the epitome of generational trauma as many have said but as much trauma as Ava has, she is also loving and willing to learn. The fact Erika took this adversarial role is incredible. The tense dramatic scene primarily between Ava, Tula and Viola is amazing. They act their asses off and make hard choices that I imagine are difficult even for such an experienced player.

Aabria's DMing always feels fun. She doesn't get bogged down in the rules. She knows them. She plays by them. But as a master, she knows how and when to break them too. Her seasons on Dimension 20 have all had a tenseness, a particular edge to them that can give me anxiety during dramatic scenes between two characters. It always feel like one of her NPCs may say something devastating and the tension between characters reaches really thrilling heights. This is present in other seasons, but I don't think anyone does it as well as she does. The first season of hers to have battle maps, Aabria really swung for the fences and gave us some of the wildest maps to date.

Shout out to Carlos Luna's voice acting. He did an incredible job. And shout out to the whole crew who have put together one of the best seasons of D20. They keep finding ways to build on what's come before and they should be commended for it.

Dimension 20 is most successful when the concept is very streamlined. They don't do huge 100 episode campaigns capable of handling huge winding complex narrative, but short focused D&D stories, which is why many of the Side Quests have been so fantastic. They embody this philosophy most clearly, but it's apparent in the most beloved Intrepid Heroes seasons as well—John Hughes/High Fantasy, Game of Thrones/Candyland, Retrofuturism, Film Noir but in a Brain... Burrow's End fits this perfectly. It's streamlined concept paired with great storytellers and great chemistry sets it up to be a smash hit before it begins. And goddamn does it deliver.

Thanks Stupendous Stoats!

[asvterias]

𝖨𝗍 𝖠𝗅𝗅 𝖥𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝖣𝗈𝗐𝗇 ~ 𝖢𝗅𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗌𝗌𝖾 𝖫𝖺 𝖱𝗎𝖾

part two || chapter playlist (1) & chapter playlist (2) || clarisse masterlist

helping palestine 🇵🇸

warnings: the killing of a monster?, character death, crying, some blood mentions & stabbing (not inflicted against us!)

pairings: (both aged up to 16) clarisse la rue ✘ black!fem!demigod!reader (daughter of poseidon) | younger!brother percy jackson ✘ older!sister!reader

genres: sally & reader’s mom (jessica) are lovers bcs GENUINELY FUCK GABE (hate his ass), reader & grover has a sibling bond, hard cold angst, sad angsty beginning, reader’s mom actually dies 🥲, reader’s emotions control the weather, very sad!reader, kinda depressed!reader, reader in denial, MAJOR character death, reader is kinda a girlboss, kinda!dark!reader x always!clueless!percy, vengeful!reader, reader is OUT for blood (specifically the Minotaur)

summary: secrets are liable to make or break the jackson-matthews family until they result in dangerous situations, nearly escaping from death…well nearly most of them managed a safe recovery.

word count: 2.7k+

tag list: @lvrue @kyuupidwrites @xanasaurusrex @urdeadpoet @aurorailvsm @quinnsadilla @st4rzl7 @p0rkbun @star-girl69 @aphroditesmoon @lcvved @tinytea-biscut @dearlydarlings @nvirskies @rocknr0ll @urbisexualfriend @k4zuhas-visi0n @marlswhore @lovelyy-moonlight @thegiganticgirlkisser @thewritingbarbie @apocalypticlibrary @solecitoszn @mira-belcul18 @ampitrit3 @mthefae @sleighingstella @korizzybee @hoku-k @liv444me @lila-went-missing @mariposa555 @cherriesnbutter @justintinderlake4 @natasha-took-fall-damage @b0ok-lover @novastarrs @urfavefag @babyzzlove @importantpotato @laughingcheese037 @iheartamberfreeman @karslyn @haerinfrr @gianni7867 @jimfiqs @4evafvctional @lyzsaphrodite @f4riedimples

author’s note: i really enjoyed writing this ngl! also i have a faceclaim for reader’s mom, jessica matthews is portrayed by candice patton.

Born from the same father but different mothers, your sibling bond with Percy was unbreakable, certainly unconditional. Your mothers were very close, growing up as best friends from when they were teenagers, accomplishing every achievement together for the sake of you and Percy’s life.

Of course, your moms fell in love, hosting a small spring wedding when you were 10 and Percy was 6 years old.

So when Sally had to move again, your mom didn’t ask questions and instead packed your bags, placing them in the car and driving to the airport. A loving family of four was maintained by dark secrets that cost lives.

With everything going on, with the upbringing of your heritage, both of your mothers went through thick and thin. Developing from friends into lovers hardly changed anything, presumably their love maintained massively for themselves and shared children.

It was a rainy day, you and Percy had just been expelled from Yancy. Nancy bullied your brother so you reacted like how any big sister would and punched her before she flew into the nearby fountain, completely drenched in water. That little defense mechanism got both you and your little brother expelled from Yancy indefinitely as you two took a train back to your parents’ apartment.

You two apologized profusely to your moms, but they remained nonchalant, telling you two to pack a bag because you were visiting your residential cabin.

Something was wrong, extremely wrong and you felt it in your gut as soon as you stepped foot into the unkept cabin. From the moment your mom became sorrowful and honest, retelling the story of how she met your father, you knew something was up. Sadly, you just didn’t know that it’d be life-changing for you both.

Interrupted by rapid knocks on the cabin door made you jump a little in surprise and your mom, Sally, went to open the door. It was Percy’s bestfriend, Grover. He was soaked from the rain and began to blabber on to your moms, incoherently talking about revealing the big secret.

“Grover…” Percy speaks, waringly looking down at his friend’s lower body, or rather the lack thereof. Shockingly enough, his lower body wasn’t one of a human’s but one of the legs of an animal, specifically a goat.

“What?” Grover snapped, turning his head to the siblings, hitting his hoove against the wooden floor.

“Grover, why is there half a goat in your pants?”

“Did your mom fuck a goat or something?” The question had to be asked, but it yet remained to be answered.

Doubled in confusion when Grover, Percy’s best friend was also your satyr protector, dedicating to getting both of you at Camp Half-Blood safely. When your mothers’ actually revealed the truth about your father’s real identity, you were appalled, to say the least. You assumed he was a deadbeat and couldn’t care less about his kids, and you were absolutely right. Only now his identity expanded in further detail, making him out to be a god, one of the most powerful gods there ever was. Therefore making you and Percy, forbidden children in both worlds, are continually being hunted by monsters, who strive to see your demise.

“Do you believe this, Y/N?” Percy turns to you, mouth open in bewilderment.

“Right now, I don’t know what to believe anymore.” You truthfully spoke.

“Did you know I’m 24?” Grover asked you innocently.

You and Percy shared the same shocked expression, “Wait? What?”

Grover winces, staring back at the two adults in the car, “Out of curiosity, what exactly did you tell them?”

“We were getting there!” Your moms shouted simultaneously at Grover.

Grover nods his head, leaning back into the seat.

“Moonlight…listen to me.” your mom looks at you through the mirror as your gaze hesitantly meets hers. “You and Percy are forbidden children, monsters are going to attack you every day, this camp can protect you both.”

“Why can’t you and Sally come with us then?” you bargained with her, tears forming in your eyes. You couldn’t imagine, much less experience your life without your mother and Sally. The same women who nurtured you since you were babies and taught you everything you knew. You refused to give up on them, everything they did was to protect and love you, and now it was your turn.

Sally starts to talk, eyes stuck on the road, “We humans are not allowed there. Only demigods like you two.”

“But we don’t wanna leave you two.” Percy persisted.

“You’re our moms.”

“You’re gonna have to, that Minotaur isn’t gonna stop until he kills both of you.”

All of a sudden, a collision hit the car with enough brute force to send the car off the road and everything went black. It was all so quick, the collision, the swiveling of the car and landing on the side of the road, far from bypassers to rescue.

The rain pattering against the car turned into a heavy rainpour as everyone in the car, hanging upside down with the seat belt anchoring them, remained still, all unconscious.

After a while, the dulling pain in your head sharply woke you up, being the first to recover from the crash. Holding your head in pain as you slowly opened your eyes, feeling the blood trickle from your head, surveying your surroundings as you saw Percy and Grover still unconscious. Quickly unbuckling your seatbelt, you got out of your seat, repeating the same action to your younger brothers.

One by one, you carefully got everyone from the car as they began to wake up. A growl from the distance urges you to move faster as you help your other mom, Sally, get out of the damaged car.

Sally, Percy, and Grover were recovering, standing on their feet, checking for any injuries and your mom was the last one who needed rescuing.

“Mom…” you shake her but her body is motionless as the tears well up in your eyes.

You felt Sally’s arm pushing you back, sending you into Percy’s and Grover’s embrace as you nervously observed.

“Come on, come on, Jess…” Sally murmurs, kneeling down, searching for a pulse. “You gotta survive, we have children together, we can’t lose you right now.”

“Is she okay?” Percy chirps up, deciding to speak for you.

You found everything incomprehensible around you, your senses became deafening and a high-pitched ringing in your head matched the loud heart beating in your chest.

When Sally stayed silent, it only worsened your anxiety, “Mom, is she okay?!” Percy speaks again, adding some base in his voice yet his tone slightly wavers.

“She has a fading pulse…” Sally whispers, sparing a sad glance at you and quickly turning back to Jessica, “It’s decreasing rapidly,”

Dropping to the muddy slippery ground on your knees, tears quickly filling the brim of your eyes, threatening to fall as you moved closer to her.

“Mommy…” you cradle her face into your chest, saddened by her face, eyes closed as blood trickles down her forehead.

“We can revive her, right!” Your voice cracks, whipping your head to Sally, “Tell me we can revive her!”

“Y/N…” Sally sighs deeply, trying to contain her own tears. You turn around, looking down at your mother, resting on your lap, body motionless yet her face looks peaceful.

“No! We- I can save her. We can do heart-to-heart compressions,” you shake your head, starting to do heart-to-heart compressions. “Why isn’t she waking up? Mommy, this isn’t funny anymore now, you have to wake up and help us. Please I can’t do this without you, I can’t do this whole new demigod thing without you.” your voice was dry, as you leaned down, blowing air into her mouth, hoping for a miracle to occur.

You didn’t truly believe in miracles, but for your mother, you’d start believing it. Right now, you would do whatever it took to bring her back even if it meant wishing on the impossible.

“We didn’t do plenty of things yet, I wanted you and Sally to meet my first girlfriend, attend my graduation, be there when I move out and eventually get married, and get grandkids from Percy because we both know I’m not going through that torture.”

Your senses became intensely heightened, catching onto Grover’s whisper to Sally, ignoring him as you spoke up.

“I refuse to leave her alone, she isn’t dead, just having some problems waking up and getting a pulse back.” You were in extreme denial, “Come on, mum, you focus on her face, giving her air and I’ll do her chest,” you beckoned Sally forward.

“Sweetheart…she’s already….gone.”

“She’s my mom and Percy’s mom, your wife. She wasn’t supposed to die this early. If all you’re gonna do is stand there and be useless, don’t bother talking to me.” It wasn’t intentional to snap at your other mom, but your emotions were driving you crazy and brazen.

“You’re the sun to my moon, Mommy, I can’t shine when you’re not there with me.” You sobbed. Despite being physically exhausted, you weren’t giving up on trying to revive your mom, she would have never given up on you so you would stop trying until you had something, anything; a pulse, a gasp, her eyes shooting up. “Remember…” You weakly asked, holding onto the moon-shaped necklace on your neck, staring at your mom’s sun-shaped necklace.

The sky crackled with slight thunder as the rain poured down heavier. Finally understanding the meaning of your nickname, you sobbed desperately until the broken cracks of your voice gave out.

There was no sunshine without her moonlight, always them being in a pair, nothing without the other. Sadly, you lost your sunshine, darkening your moonlight to its deepest depths, harvesting it into something vengeful and heartless. Something that even scared you to a certain extent, like this was another new side flourishing because of the horrible circumstances.

“Hold up, is Y/N doing that?” Percy quietly asks Grover.

You rested your mom on the ground, ignoring the cold rainpour.

“She’s gone…” Sally cries, grabbing your arm and pushing you into her body for a hug. You cried into the hug, tightening your grip as your wails echoed throughout the forest. Maybe this was all a nightmare, where you’d wake up and relax in reality. This was the time that your mom needed to wake you up and reassure you that she was right there, staying with you and protecting you.

Your chest clenched against your rib cage, devastation wracked throughout your entire body as the tears relentlessly spilled out.

“But she- she can’t be gone!” You hiccup, eyes glossing over with fresh tears, feeling another arm snuggle around your side.

“I know, sweetheart. I’m so sorry,” she caressed your face.

“What kind of demigod I am, if I was blessed with all these supernatural powers, can’t even save my Mom from death? What kind of daughter am I to just stand by and watch her own mother die? I don’t want this demigod life anymore, please take it all away if it meant my mother is coming back, to me, to home.”

“Don’t you ever say that again, you did everything you could, your perseverance is one of your strongest qualities that Jessica adored very much. She wouldn’t want you to doubt yourself like this nor would I,” Sally reassures you, resting a thumb on your cheek, “Our beautiful daughter, she’s so proud of you, I want you to know that.”

Your eyes were puffy and red from tears as you listened to your mother’s words of encouragement and reassurance.

Much to your dismay, another loud roar broke the semi-family grievance, reminding them of the harsh reality.

“We have to go now!” Grover hastily urges.

“I’m not leaving my mom here like this,” you point to her figure on the ground.

“We won’t, I promise you, sweetie. I’ll give her a proper burial, but right now we have to go!” Her tone was urgent as she quickly scanned the dark forest with the illumination from the car light.

You hurriedly rushed towards your mother’s still figure on the muddy ground, leaning down.

“Goodbye, Mom,” you whisper hoarsely, kissing her forehead for the last time. You stared down at her neck, gazing at the sunlight necklace she wore and yanked it off, and shoved the meaningful jewelry into your back pocket. Your heart broke again, realizing she can’t respond back, despite being in extreme denial.

Unfortunately, that was the last time you saw your moms, one died in your arms and the other sacrificed herself for her children’s safety.

The pain and suffering became a dangerous mix of anger and hatred directed at the Minotaur.

Grover’s statements fall on deaf ears, partially drowned out by the heavy rainfall. “Y/N and Percy come on, we’re almost there.” you glance at your blonde brother who holds the same expression on his face. You were going to avenge your mothers, and you didn’t care if you died trying. This monster had already taken your worlds away, so you had nobody else to lose.

Grabbing the pen from your pocket, holding it out, and witnessing it transform into a golden sword at will.

The fight with the Minotaur was brutal and intense, alongside the heavy downpour of rain attempted to slow down the intensity of this fight. Despite double-teaming the monster, he resisted surrender, determined to win and kill you both. Surprisingly, you gained the agility to climb onto his back while Percy distracted him.

Somehow, you gained the ultimate advantage with the lighting sword in your hand and stabbed the monster in its eye, ignoring his roar of pain. If anything its pain only further encouraged you to continue.

Too full of adrenaline, you grab his two horns, gripping them and pulling them out with your utmost strength. A new sudden strength you just obtained. Gasping in shock was quickly outlived when your sword slipped out of your hand and dropped onto the muddy ground, disappearing from your eyesight. Stumbling onto his feet, inflicted by the pain, you groaned, gripping the monster by his rough skin as he attempted to shake you off.

“Percy the sword!” You yelled at him. Your brother throws the sword upwards as you catch the weapon.

You stab the monster in the neck, wincing at his loud screeches, but continue to stab his neck. Once the monster was deemed weak enough, you sliced the sword right through his neck, seizing the opportunity of successfully killing it.

This was all this stupid monster’s fault. If it hadn’t chased after you or slammed itself into the car, your mom would be alive. If it didn’t have such a bloodthirst for demigods, Sally, your mum would still be alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. You just wished your moms were alive, to see you mature into such a courageous daughter to avenge their deaths.

Soon enough, the monster staggered on its feet and its body began to disintegrate into black dust before your eyes.

“Y/N!” The voice becomes disoriented as you stumble on the ground, two arms catching you as you faint, everything fading away into a black abyss.

likes, comments and reblogs are highly appreciated!

© asvterias, 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works onto any other platforms without my permission.

[youremyheaven]

Ashlesha & Toxic Relationships

Tw: abuse, incest, rape, death, domestic violence

I feel like Ashlesha's mommy issues have been covered by others before but I really wanted to explore how Ashlesha nakshatra natives often find themselves in toxic relationships, be it in their own homes or in romantic relationships. I think many of the patterns many people repeat in adult relationships has its roots in their childhood relationships with their family and I see this very evident with many Ashlesha natives. They're often abused at home and later suffer abuse at the hands of partners.

Halle Berry Ashlesha Sun

Halle's father was a violent man who abused her mother repeatedly. He abandoned them when she was 4 and she's been estranged from him since.

She moved with her mother and sister to an all-white neighbourhood where she was exposed to racial discrimination while attending school. Halle admits that these struggles motivated her to succeed. Later in the ’90s, when she moved to New York to pursue her acting career, she was forced to stay in a homeless shelter for a while because she couldn’t afford accommodations.

In 2011, Halle said: "It was only when I was in an abusive relationship and blood squirted on the ceiling of my apartment and I lost 80% of my hearing in my ear that I realised, I have to break the cycle."

Halle is divorced from Gabriel Aubry (in photo with her above) who, she accused of being a racist (he used racial slurs towards her and their daughter), refused to acknowledge their daughter as biracial and court documents revealed that Berry accused him of having been in an incestuous relationship with a family member, abusing their daughter and even revealed the couple only had sex three times a year, with Aubry struggling with the effects of his incestuous relationship.

Charlize Theron- Ashlesha Sun, Moon & Mercury

One night, when her verbally abusive alcoholic father came home with his brother after drinking heavily, he threatened her mother with a gun. He began shooting and Theron's mother grabbed her gun and shot back, killing Theron's father and wounding his brother. Police later determined it was self-defence. They later moved to America so Charlize could pursue an acting career.

Lily Collins, Ashlesha Moon

Lily Collins says she was once in a toxic relationship where she faced "verbal and emotional abuse" that made her feel "very small." Looking back, Lily says her then-boyfriend silenced her feelings and even fuelled emotions of "panic" and "anxiety" -- and it's something that still affects her even though she’s now in a healthy relationship.

"He would call me 'Little Lily'…and he'd use awful words about me in terms of what I was wearing and would call me a whore and all these things," she said on the "We Can Do Hard Things" podcast. "There were awful words and then there were belittling words. I became quite silent and comfortable in silence and feeling like I had to make myself small to feel super safe."

Tina Turner, Ashlesha Rising

Tina’s violent marriage with Ike Turner is well known, largely thanks to the film based on her life, What’s Love Got To Do With It. In the film the singer suffered severe beatings, was raped and had cigarettes stubbed out on her body. Her husband Ike is portrayed as a violent, controlling sociopath, and when Tina’s autobiography was published Ike actually admitted that the book was largely accurate. The pair were married for 16 years before Tina had the courage to leave. Ike is now dead.

I found something she said in an interview to closely correlate to Ashlesha:

"Part of my spiritual practice is to “change poison into medicine,” to take negative situations or roadblocks and transform or remove them through positivity. The force of my positivity pushed all the discriminatory “isms” standing in my way right out the window."

Whitney Houston- Ashlesha Sun & Venus

Their turbulent relationship is well documented, but even though the rumors were that Bobby used to hit Whitney, she actually claimed it was the other way round. In an interview with the Associated Press over 10 years ago, the singing star said: “Contrary to belief, I do the hitting, he doesn’t. He has never put his hands on me. We are crazy for one another. I mean crazy in love, love, love, love, love. When we’re fighting, it’s like that’s love for us. We’re fighting for our love.” Brown, however, was later arrested in 2003 for misdemeanour battery, several years after Whitney said this. The pair eventually divorced after 15 years of marriage in 2007.

Unfortunately, Whitney passed away in 2012 and I firmly believe Bobby did it. Her daughter, Bobbi Brown also passed away in the exact same way in 2015 and there's just no way those 2 deaths were a coincidence. Anytime I hear news of anybody dying in their bathtub after overdosing on a cocktail of drugs, I just know they were murdered. Its very easy to write off deaths as suicide or to make it look like one. Its all the more convincing if the person has a history of drug abuse.

Sridevi, Ashlesha Sun & Rising

Sridevi was forced into acting by her mother (who aspired to be an actress and had failed in her pursuit) when she was 2-3yrs old. Sridevi never received formal education and appeared in 200 films by the time she was 25 years old (she did 300 films total). Her mother and stepfather had another daughter whom they favoured. Sridevi was the cash cow of the household. It was once reported that Sridevi would come home from a long day of filming and spend many hours massaging her mother's feet at night instead of sleeping. Her mother once locked up Sridevi in a dark room and starved her as a 5-year-old because she was too scared to do a scene that involved fire. She became a heroine at the age of 11 years and was paired opposite men who had played her grandad onscreen when she was a child star🤮🤮🤮she was sexually assaulted by many of these men as a child and teenager. Sridevi's mother managed all her finances and did not permit her to go out or meet others and she did not even know how to do virtually anything by herself as her mother kept her under lock and key.

Her husband Boney Kapoor is a movie producer who was married to another woman and had 2 kids when he first met Sridevi. He creepily wooed her for 10 years but Sridevi paid him no mind. In 1995, Sridevi's mother passed away and Boney took full advantage of her vulnerability because even though she was 32, she was basically a child due to the way her mother forced her to live. Sridevi had no one to rely on (her stepfather had died many years prior and her sister sued her for properties and since she was so isolated, she had no friends despite being such a huge star) and Boney took her in. She lived with Boney and his wife and kids but before you knew it, Sridevi was impregnated by him and he soon divorced his wife and married her. In 2018, Sridevi was found dead in a bathtub in Dubai under suspicious circumstances. The case was wrapped up pretty quickly and no one really knows what happened. She allegedly "drowned" but like I said, I dont think all these celebs drowning in their bathtubs is a coincidence.

Zsa Zsa Gabor- Ashlesha Moon

She was married 9 times and many of those marriages were hella toxic. She was married to Conrad Hilton (Paris Hilton's great-grandfather)

She said of the marriage:

"Conrad's decision to change my name from Zsa Zsa to Georgia symbolized everything my marriage to him would eventually become. My Hungarian roots were to be ripped out and my background ignored. ... I soon discovered that my marriage to Conrad meant the end of my freedom. My own needs were completely ignored: I belonged to Conrad."

Gabor's only child, daughter Constance Francesca Hilton, was born in 1947. According to Gabor's 1991 autobiography, One Lifetime Is Not Enough, her pregnancy resulted from rape by then-husband Conrad Hilton.

Marilyn Monroe- Ashlesha Rising

Marilyn had a very difficult life. She grew up in foster homes, her mother was schizophrenic and her father was an alcoholic. Her marriages were unhappy and she was treated like shit by the industry. I don't want to elaborate too much because I feel like everyone already knows about her life story but its truly tragic how things were for her :((

Lucille Ball- Ashlesha Sun

She was married to her onscreen husband Desi Arnaz and they had a horrible toxic marriage where he cheated on her repeatedly and emotionally abused her. He was also an alcoholic.

Bella Hadid, Mars in Ashlesha atmakaraka

"I constantly went back to men -- and also, women -- that had abused me, and that's where the people-pleasing came in," Hadid said on the Victoria's Secret podcast, "VS Voices."  "I started to not have boundaries, not only sexually, physically, emotionally, but then it went into my workspace….I began to be a people-pleaser with my job and it was everyone else's opinion of me that mattered except for my own, because I essentially was putting my worth into the hands of everyone else and that was the detriment of it."

Everybody already knows that Yolanda is toxic as hell, made Bella get a nose job at 14yrs of age and in Bella's own words she was made to feel like the "uglier sister".

Viola Davis, Ashlesha Sun

She and her sisters were sexually abused by their brother. "Sexual abuse back in the day didn't have a name. The abusers were called 'dirty old men' and the abused were called 'fast' or 'heifers,'" she wrote in her memoir.

Davis wrote about the volatile relationship between her empathetic mother and her violent, alcoholic father. With brutal candidness, she channels the unrelenting terror of living in a household of domestic abuse: “There are not enough pages to mention the fights, the constantly being awakened in the middle of the night or coming home after school to my dad’s rages and praying he wouldn’t lose so much control that he would kill my mom.”

Lil Kim, Ashlesha Moon

When she sat down for a candid interview with Newsweek back in 2000, the rapper revealed that she developed a complex about her appearance thanks to a string of unsavory suitors. "All my life men have told me I wasn't pretty enough — even the men I was dating," she revealed. "I'd be like, 'Well, why are you with me, then? I have low self-esteem and I always have," she admitted. "Guys always cheated on me with women who were European-looking. You know, the long-hair type. Really beautiful women. That left me thinking, 'How can I compete with that?' Being a regular black girl wasn't good enough."

It wasn't just the men she dated in her early days that messed with Lil Kim's head — according to the rapper, her own father added to her issues. Her parents divorced when she was 8 and, despite the fact that she wanted to remain with her mother, her dad won custody. When she spoke to Newsweek ahead of the release of her second studio album, The Notorious K.I.M, she revealed that her father would regularly make her feel as though she wasn't good enough. "It was like I could do nothing right," she recalled. "Everything about me was wrong — my hair, my clothes, just me."

Ella Fitzgerald, Ashlesha Rising

At a young 15 years old, Fitzgerald was left motherless and fatherless. To make matters worse, she began being abused by her stepfather. The beatings were physical, but they scared her emotionally as well. She was a beaten and battered child. Her grades fell to be nearly unrecoverable, and she began skipping school regularly. It was an era of racial segregation and Ella is also believed to have been physically abused by her teachers along with some other black students.

Ella and Marilyn were good friends and are said to have bonded over their similarly traumatic lives.

Katie Holmes, Ashlesha Moon & Rising

She escaped an abusive marriage with the sociopathic Tom Cruise and his cult??? need I say more?? I am so happy she is alive and well and that she has managed to protect her daughter as well. Scientologists are insane people who absolutely destroy the lives of anybody who tries to leave their system so its a miracle that Katie is alive and doing well.

Glenn Close, Ashlesha Rising

I don't know what it is about Ashleshas and being trapped/escaping a cult but I've noticed several Ashlesha natives all have this experience

Oscar-nominated actress Glenn Close, for example, was part of a cult called the Moral Re-Armament, from the young age of 7 all the way up to 22. “If you talk to anybody who was in a group that basically dictates how you’re supposed to live and what you’re supposed to say and how you’re supposed to feel, from the time you’re 7 till the time you’re 22, it has a profound impact on you,” she once told The Hollywood Reporter.

Patricia Arquette- Ashlesha Moon

Oscar winner Patricia Arquette wasn’t just raised in Virginia’s Skymont Subud cult, but her parents were the founders of it. The so-called “spiritual movement” was known for not allowing access to bathrooms, electricity, or running water in the name of “inner guidance.” 

While still living with her family, she and her family left the commune to return to a more conventional life. Per ABC, however, the Arquette family wasn’t any better at that time either. “There was a lot of drama in the house,” Arquette said in an interview with Oprah Winfrey. “There were a lot of chairs flying around.”

Brie Larson- Ketu in Ashlesha

Brie starred in two movies, The Glass Castle & The Room that both deal with abusive relationships (she is the one stuck in them)

Our Ketu placement is where we draw our creativity from, so its interesting that Brie has played so many characters who have to deal with toxicity.

According to Hindu mythology, Ashlesha nakshatra is associated with the story of the Naga King Vasuki. It is said that Vasuki and his wife were cursed by a sage to become snakes. In order to lift the curse, they sought the help of Lord Vishnu, who advised them to perform a penance in the ashram of a sage named Jaratkaru. After performing the penance, the sage granted their wish and they were able to regain their human form. Since then, Ashlesha nakshatra has been associated with transformation and the power of penance.

In the list of celebrities I have mentioned, many of them survived their abuse and went on to live good lives but many others met with tragic ends. Being "cursed" is part of Ashlesha's mythology, which is why they receive an unfair share of bad experiences and abuse but to perform penance is very very important and something not many are going to be able to do. When so many terrible things happen to you, you're bound to think "why me? I'm a good person, I don't deserve this" and that's absolutely true, no one deserves abuse but the ones who can outlive these negative circumstances are the ones who can in Tina Turner's words "turn poison into medicine". Penance literally means inflicting punishment upon oneself but what it actually means in this context is to turn all your negative experiences that feel like you're being punished into something you can rise up above against. Poison is also part of Ashlesha's lore and while this does make Ashlesha natives rather malicious and manipulative towards others, they need to be able to use this poison as medicine to heal themselves. Otherwise, they end up succumbing to it.

[justlemmeadoreyou]

hopelessly devoted to you - 4

Summary: The divorce battle is here, and Harry has prepared you well. Will it go exactly how you wish it should?

Words: 4.3k+

Warnings: angst, crying, insecurities, a divorce and custody battle in court, a kiss. fluff too!

previous part here | series masterlist

The morning of the custody hearing, the courthouse was tense. . You walked in hand-in-hand with Harry, drawing strength from his reassuring presence. Elliot was already there, stone-faced with his arrogant lawyer in tow. The second you made eye contact, his expression twisted into a sneer, looking at you with so much anger and disgust.

Harry leaned in close as you took your seats. "Don't worry about him, yeah? We've got this in the bag as long as you stick to the truth."

He knew that Elliot still had an impact on you, years of torture doesn’t just slip away in one day. But when he wanted to pull you down, he knew he needed to be the support you could climb on to.

You gave a jerky nod, your stomach tying itself in knots. Despite all the evidence and preparation, a nagging voice whispered that it could all go wrong. That Elliot might somehow slither his way out unscathed like he always did. That he would take your daughter away from you, and you would end up with nothing.

The courtroom quieted as the bailiff's gruff voice rang out. "All rise for the honorable Judge Peterson."

Here we go.

The opening statements set an ominous tone. Elliot's lawyer, an oily shark of a man, wasted no time painting you as a scorned, unstable wife making reckless accusations against his client. He portrayed Elliot as a doting family man being unfairly persecuted. A man who was always devoted to his family, and never showed even the tiniest bit of anger toward you.

What a lie, what a lie, what a lie.

But the facade he was putting on didn’t seem to be working. He kept looking down, at the walls, at the stenographer, but never straight front, like an honest person would

Harry's jaw tensed, but his rebuttal was measured and methodical. Over the next few minutes, he clearly outlined the mountain of evidence against your soon-to-be ex -eyewitness testimonies, the drunken, unhinged video from your mother's home, and most damningly, Ellie's own statement about the threatening "uncle" who accompanied Elliot.

You could see the first fissures of doubt cracking Elliot's cocky veneer when Harry finished. His smug lawyer already looked rattled.

Finally, you were called to the stand. Harry's steadfast gaze assured you as you raised your right hand to be sworn in. This was it - time to confront your demons once and for all.

"In your own words, can you describe the sequence of events that led you to pursue this divorce and custody case against Mr. Harris?" the judge prompted in a neutral tone.

You took a fortifying breath and launched into your well-practiced testimony. Every sickening detail, from the escalating verbal and emotional abuse to Elliot's drunken rampages, poured out in an unstoppable torrent. In front of you, Ellie huddled against your mother's side, her little face pale. You never wanted her to listen to these horrors you had experienced, but her testimony was important for the case too. Plus, it was the hearing for her custody, so she had to be present.

Elliot's lawyer tried to shake you, pelting you with ruthless character attacks about being a negligent mother, a cheating wife, an alcoholic with anger issues. 

But, Harry had prepped you well. 

"Look him in the eye and don't let his tactics rattle you. He's trying to make you doubt yourself, but we both know your truth."

So you steeled yourself and stared Elliot down, refusing to be cowed any longer. The more you spoke, the more flustered and furious his lawyer became until he finally sputtered to a halt, realizing his tactics weren't landing.

When you finally stepped down, Harry's proud smile was all the reassurance you needed. The evidence was mounting, the cracks in Elliot's case becoming increasingly apparent. You could sense the momentum shifting in your favor.

The final twist came during Elliot's ex-buddy's testimony. His so-called "friend" strode in, flanked by guards, having been detained on an unrelated matter. The guy's sheer size and plethora of vivid tattoos made it instantly clear why Ellie had been so frightened.

Elliot kept shooting venomous glares at the hulking man, until the shocking revelation dropped - Elliot had hired this terrifying figure as hired muscle to muscle you into giving up Ellie during their confrontation at her school. He was going to take Ellie home with him, once he had threatened you when you came to pick her up.

Pandemonium erupted. Elliot was forcibly restrained as he launched himself towards his traitorous former ally, bellowing vile curses and threats, even spitting at him. The judge had to call a recess while order was restored, the courtroom buzzing with shocked murmurs.

When proceedings finally resumed, the flinty-eyed judge stared Elliot down as a broken, bitter man. Any veneer of upstanding family man had been irrevocably shattered, leaving only a twisted bully raging against consequences of his own making.

At long last, Judge Peterson took a fortifying breath and delivered her ruling. "In light of the preponderance of evidence pointing to ongoing domestic abuse, alcoholism, and reckless endangerment of a minor, I am awarding full legal and physical custody of the child to Mrs. Y/N Y/L/N . Mr. Elliot Harris will be granted supervised visitation rights upon completion of court-mandated therapy and rehabilitation, to be re-evaluated quarterly."

You sagged in your seat, all the tension fleeing in a rush of dizzying relief. It was over. You had won. Tears were welling up in your eyes, but you didn’t want to cry. Not right now.

Harry was beside you in an instant, strong arms enveloping you in a fierce hug. "You were incredible, darling," he murmured against your hair, steadying you while happy tears streamed down your cheeks. "You never gave up fighting for your little girl. I'm so damned proud of you."

His warm breath caressed your skin as you tilted your head back to gaze up at him, savoring the admiration and affection blazing in his expression. For weeks you had fought to ignore the deepening feelings simmering between you. There was a connection, an intimacy that went far beyond even close friends.

Now, caught in his tender embrace, everything suddenly felt so complicated. This remarkable man had strode into your life like a soothing balm, sheltering you and Ellie from the ugliness with his steadfast strength and kindness. He had faced down your darkest demons and emerged victorious, like a knight in shining armor.

Surely you couldn't be naive enough to believe he felt anything more for you than loyalty between friends and allies? And even if he did share the growing spark you felt, acting on it would only stir up more upheaval in the wake of this custody battle, wouldn't it?

You almost convinced yourself that Harry sensed your spiraling doubts at that moment. His bright green eyes dimmed ever so slightly, letting you tuck away whatever fragile intimacy had been blooming between you.

Instead, he simply rested his forehead against yours for a heartbeat, offering you a tender smile before releasing you from his arms. 

Right, back to being consummate professionals.

"Let's go get your little girl so we can celebrate properly, eh?" he murmured, clearing his throat. "I'll call for a car to take us back to mine. Pizza and a night in watching crappy telly. Think Ellie would like that?"

You had no place to live, and in a moment, he had given you a home and a promise–of keeping you and your daughter safe till you parted ways.

Parted ways.

You managed a shaky laugh, ignoring the dull ache in your heart as the moment passed. "She'd love it. Thank you, Harry...for everything."

So you followed him obediently towards the corridor where your mother was waiting with Ellie. For the time being, you would bask in your hard-won victory and focus on nothing but enjoying this reprieve. As for whatever was simmering between you and Harry...that would have to wait.

Because you couldn't afford more complications right now. Not when you were both still putting the shattered pieces of your respective lives back together. Not when the slightest miscalculation could unravel the fragile peace and security you had fought so hard for.

So you pushed away the nagging awareness of all the lingering glances, the heated charged moments when you gravitate towards one another without thought. The profound sense of being utterly seen and cherished for the first time in your life.

All of that would need to be firmly locked away for now, you decided as Harry swept Ellie up into his arms amid her delighted squeals. The way he blinked rapidly to hold back tears you pretended not to notice. The tender, protective way his free hand found the small of your back as he ushered you both out of the courthouse towards your waiting car.

He was fulfilling something he didn’t have to.

For this little while, you would dwell only on the joy. On reveling in your fresh start, free from the shackles of abuse and toxicity that had haunted you for so long. When the time was right to face your blossoming connection with this man who had become your steadfast champion, you would find the courage to lean into those feelings.

But first, you would savor this night with your daughter and the closest friend you now considered family. You would let Ellie's happy laughter soothe every last ache as you snuggled on Harry's plush sofa watching terrible rom-coms and eating a greasy pizza.

Tomorrow could bring what it may. Tonight, you were simply basking in your own rebirth alongside your two favorite people in the world.

The next few weeks passed in a cozy, domestic blur. True to his word, Harry insisted you and Ellie stay with him to decompress after the emotional turmoil of the custody battle. His spacious flat became your safe haven, a sanctuary where you could begin piecing your little family back together.

With Ellie happily ensconced in the guest room surrounded by plush toys and her favorite books, you found yourself settling into an easy routine with Harry. Mornings were spent enjoying elaborate breakfasts he seemed to delight in whipping up - blueberry pancakes drizzled with sweet lemon curd, thick-cut bacon, and frothy hot chocolates for your girl.

"She barely ate anything for months with all the stress," you admitted one morning, watching Ellie devour her third pancake with unbridled glee. "It's such a relief to see her appetite back."

Harry merely reached over to squeeze your hand, offering you that soul-soothing smile. "She's got her mum back now. And she knows she's finally safe."

You tried not to dwell too much on the way those words settled deep in your bones like a warm caress. How you lived for the casual touches, the reassuring embraces that always seemed to ground you so effortlessly. For the first time in forever, you felt truly seen in a way that transcended the ugliness of your past.

Evenings were spent watching musicals and Disney classics cuddled on the sofa, Ellie snuggled between you both. Her delighted giggles as Harry crooned along to the silliest songs in that rich baritone never failed to make your heart swell. Sometimes you would glance over to find him already watching you with an achingly soft expression, his gaze heated yet tender.

Those were the moments your breath would catch, the awareness of him washing over you with heady intensity before you quickly averted your stare. Falling for your knight in sharply-tailored armor would only lead to catastrophe, you constantly reminded yourself.   

Because Harry was planning to request a transfer out of the city once your divorce was finalized.

"Big changes are in order for me too, love," he confessed one evening after Ellie had dozed off between you, her beloved stuffed bunny clutched in her arms. "I've been feeling the need to shake things up for a while now, get out of the big city's toxic rat race. Go to a more quiet place."

You tried not to let your broken expression show, focusing instead on stroking Ellie's soft curls. "That makes sense. You've more than earned a fresh start after...well, everything."

Harry hummed in agreement, lazily tracing patterns on your knee with the pads of his fingertips - an idle gesture that nevertheless sent shivers down your spine and heat lancing through your core. 

It was a harmless habit you had gotten yourself, feeling safe with his touch on your body.

You would have to get rid of it soon too.

"Who knows, maybe I'll finally make good on that dream of opening a practice in some sleepy seaside town where the most vicious crimes are petty theft and parking violations," he teased, emerald eyes twinkling mischievously.

You rolled your eyes but couldn't quite banish your looming sense of loss. The thought of this man eventually exiting your life, leaving just another Harry-shaped hole...it was unfathomable after everything you'd been through together. But you would never ask him to derail his aspirations just to assuage your own growing fears of abandonment.

No, you loved him and–

Oh.

Oh shit.

You loved him.

And loving means knowing how to let go.

"Well wherever you end up, I hope a certain little moppet will be welcome to visit her favorite uncle from time to time," you replied, aiming for a lighter tone.

Harry's penetrating gaze flickered over your face, savoring every feature in a way that made you flush with self-consciousness. "Nothing would make me happier," he rasped, his voice thick with an undercurrent of emotion that sent your heart racing.

You cleared your throat and quickly glanced away, cursing your traitorous heart. Allowing yourself to indulge in the growing spark between you would only lead to more pain when he eventually left. It was better to savor these peaceful moments without becoming ensnared by the hope of anything more lasting.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," you said, forcing a smile. "I'm sure Ellie will be heartbroken when you inevitably move on to greener pastures."

Harry's expression faltered, a shadow of hurt flickering across his features before he schooled his face into a neutral mask. "You're right, of course," he murmured, shifting his gaze to Ellie's sleeping form. "I wouldn't want to upset the little one."

An awkward silence fell between you, the air thick with unspoken tension. You hated the way you could practically feel the walls going up around him, the fragile intimacy you'd shared fracturing under the weight of your own doubts and fears.

Desperate to recapture the easy camaraderie you'd found, you reached out and squeezed his hand. "Harry, I...I don't mean to push you away. It's just—" You sighed, struggling to find the right words. "This has all been so overwhelming, and I can't bear the thought of Ellie getting her heart broken when you inevitably leave.” you took a applause, before saying, “Like everyone else does”

And that shattered Harry’s heart.

His grip tightened around your fingers, his thumb brushing soothing circles against your skin. "I understand, love. Believe me, I don't want to hurt either of you. But I hope you know that no matter where I end up, you and Ellie will always have a place in my life."

You offered him a watery smile, your heart swelling with gratitude and affection for this incredible man. "Thank you, Harry. That means more to me than you know."

He returned your smile, the warmth in his gaze making your breath catch. In that moment, you wanted nothing more than to lean in and kiss him, to let yourself get lost in the comfort and security of his embrace.

But you couldn't. Not when the future was so uncertain, not when your wounds were still so fresh. So you settled for savoring the tender intimacy of the moment, committing every detail to memory.

So you smiled and changed the subject. Because you were the one who chose this path by pursuing divorce, setting into motion the dominos that would ultimately rob you of Harry's steadfast presence.  This day had always been coming.

Still, you couldn't regret finally summoning the courage to shed your shackles and start anew, no matter how bittersweet the cost. For the first time in her young life, Ellie could simply revel in being a normal little girl without the specter of her father's anger and demons looming.  You had given your daughter the truest gift of all - the freedom to grow up unchained by fear and toxicity.

Looking at Harry cuddling her sleeping form, his handsome face awash in tender adoration, you felt a sudden flare of bone-deep gratitude for this remarkable man despite the pain of his future absence. You would carry the strength and resilience he had shown you for the rest of your days. 

So you allowed yourself a fleeting moment of weakness, reaching over to interlace your fingers with his where they rested on Ellie's back. Harry froze at the contact, eyes snapping up to bore into yours with molten intensity. His sharp inhale was clearly audible in the stillness of the room.

But you simply angled your body to face him fully, committing every chiseled plane and nuance of his expression to memory - from those soulful evergreen irises to the dusting of freckles across his proud nose to those ridiculously lush lips you had definitely not imagined kissing more than once.

You didn't speak, though. Somehow you both instinctually understood that words would only taint the profound intimacy thrumming between you in that suspended heartbeat. 

Then you released his hand, the moment fracturing before your heart could betray you even further. Harry gulped harshly, his throat bobbing as he visibly steadied himself.  The air itself seemed to shiver with all the things you refused to acknowledge aloud.

This connection - this blissful yet transient pas de deux you had stumbled into with your dearest friend and savior - was too profound to be reduced to something as ephemeral as mere words. It simply was, and you would soak in every remaining second before you inevitably drifted apart.

Because people like Harry Styles didn't stick around forever, no matter how desperately you might wish it. He was a brilliant, vital force of nature destined for a grand future full opportunity. While you, well...you were just the broken divorcee still only beginning to rebuild your life from the ashes.  

So you would let him go with your blessing, just as he had given you the greatest gift imaginable - your precious Ellie's hand to cling to as you stepped out of the shadows and into the warmth at long last. As you inhaled the gentle citrus notes of his cologne that had become such a source of comfort, you swore to cherish every beautiful memory this extraordinary man had gifted you.

Then tomorrow would come, and the future would wash over you with its inevitable tides of change. But for tonight, you had this: your baby girl secure in Harry's loving embrace, oblivious to the bittersweet poignant permeating the air. The sense of belonging, even if it was only fleeting.

So you smiled and tucked yourself against Ellie's side to bask in their combined warmth, feeling more whole and cherished than you ever dared to dream. The outside world and all its tumult could wait until morning. Here and now in this fragile cocoon, you had finally rediscovered your sense of home.

The next few weeks passed in a cozy, domestic blur. Harry's spacious flat became your safe haven, a sanctuary where you could begin piecing your little family back together. Mornings were spent enjoying elaborate breakfasts he seemed to delight in whipping up, while evenings were spent watching musicals and Disney classics cuddled on the sofa.

And through it all, Harry had been your steadfast champion, your guiding light. Even if the future held the inevitability of his departure, you knew that the indelible mark he'd left on your life would continue to sustain you.

So as you drifted off to sleep, your head resting on Harry's shoulder, you allowed yourself to savor the fragile beauty of this moment. Tomorrow would come soon enough, with all its uncertainties and challenges. But for now, you were home.

In the days that followed, you found yourself clinging to those precious moments of stillness and contentment. The easy camaraderie you and Harry had built slowly began to mend, the awkwardness of your previous conversation fading into the background.

Ellie's joyful laughter and unbridled enthusiasm were a balm to your soul, and you reveled in watching her blossom under Harry's doting attention. He seemed to have an innate knack for making her feel safe, treasured – qualities you'd long feared your daughter would never experience.

As you observed the two of them together, you couldn't help but find yourself falling deeper under Harry's spell. The way he looked at Ellie, with such pure, unconditional love, made your heart swell with a yearning you dared not give voice to. And when his gaze would shift to you, the tenderness and raw adoration shining in those mesmerizing green eyes left you positively breathless.

Still, you resisted the urge to lean into that budding connection, reminding yourself of the inevitable heartbreak that would follow. Harry's plans to leave the city were a constant presence in the back of your mind, a relentless drumbeat that refused to be silenced.

But as the days turned into weeks, and your divorce was finalized without incident, you found yourself growing bolder. Little by little, you allowed the walls around your heart to crumble, letting Harry's presence seep into the cracks. His unwavering support, his fierce loyalty – it was a lifeline you clung to .

And when he would catch you watching him, that all-too-familiar heat blooming in the depths of his gaze, you didn't look away. Instead, you'd hold his stare, daring him to make the first move, to finally tear down the fragile barriers you'd both erected.

The simmering tension between you was palpable, a living, breathing thing that threatened to consume you both. You knew you were playing with fire, risking the precious friendship you'd forged in the crucible of your darkest moments. You couldn't resist Harry's warmth and devotion.

Harry reached out and gently brushed a stray lock of hair from your face. The simple gesture sent electricity crackling down your spine, and you found yourself leaning into his touch, your eyes fluttering shut.

"Y/N," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "I... I can't stop thinking about you. About us."

Your heart pounded in your ears as you slowly opened your eyes, drowning in the vulnerability etched across his handsome features. "Harry..." you breathed, your fingers trembling as you covered his hand with your own.

"I know it's complicated, and that I'm planning to leave," he continued, his thumb tenderly caressing your cheek. "But I can't deny this any longer. The way I feel about you, it's...it's everything."

You found yourself nodding, tears pricking the corners of your eyes as the weight of his confession settled over you. "I feel it too, Harry. God, I've tried so hard to ignore it, but—"

He silenced you with a gentle press of his fingers against your lips, his gaze burning with an intensity that stole your breath away. "Then don't," he murmured, his face inching closer to yours. "Don't ignore it. Let me in, Y/N. Please."

The world seemed to slow to a crawl as you stared into the depths of his eyes, searching for any hint of doubt or hesitation. But all you found was a fierce, unwavering adoration that threatened to unravel you completely.

Slowly, reverently, you lifted a trembling hand to cup his jaw, marveling at the soft scratch of his stubble against your palm. 

"Well, then, I guess one man's trash is another man's treasure," you said, the words slipping out without a second thought. The smile faded from Harry's lips, his brow furrowing.

"Don't ever say that again." His voice was soft yet firm. "You are a treasure. You're my treasure. But you were never anything less than that, not to me."

Before you could respond, he leaned in and captured your lips in a searing kiss. All the unspoken feelings between you ignited, the world narrowing down to just the two of you. You melted into his embrace, your fingers tangling in his soft curls as you surrendered to the passion consuming you both.

His lips moved against yours in a way that had you melting into him. His touch was soft, almost as if trying not to break you.

When you finally parted, breathless and flushed, you found yourself drowning in the sheer adoration etched across his face. "Bloody hell, you're everything," he murmured, pressing his forehead to yours. "I didn't mean to fall for you, but I can't imagine my life without you in it."

You chuckled weakly, your fingers tracing the sharp lines of his jaw. "I think it's a little late for that, Harry. I'm afraid you're stuck with me now."

His answering smile was dazzling, a glimpse of the boundless joy that had been lurking beneath the surface. "Good. That's exactly how I want it."

In that moment, the rest of the world faded away, leaving only the two of you and the sleeping child you both cherished. The future was still very much uncertain for you, but it seemed less uncertain when you knew you had Harry.

You knew the road ahead wouldn't be easy, not with Harry's departure coming. But as you curled up against him, Ellie's soft breaths ghosting across your skin, you felt a profound sense of peace wash over you.

♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡~~~♡

tell me if you like this! please reblog or comment if you like, it makes my heart happy :)

feedback | masterlist

taglist: @freedomfireflies @gurugirl @thechaoticjoy @styleslover-1994 @gem1712 @ellaorchard @bxbyysstuff @opheliaofficial07 @rafaaoli @tchlamqtsgf @the-mouse27 @indierockgirrl @vrittivsanghavi @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @drewrry @babyiamperfectforyou @me-undiscovered @tbsloneely @whoreonmondays @kathb59 @avalentina @kittenhere @speedywritingharrystylesjudge @mypolicemanharryyy @theendx888 @ladscarlett @daphnesutton @youcan-nolonger-run @prettythingsworld  @chesthairrry   @becauseheartsgetbroken-hs   @hisparentsgallerryy   @storyschanging  @selluequestrian   @islakp217 @swiftmendeshoran @princessaxoxo @tenaciousperfectionunknown @hermoinelove @chronicallybubbly @angeldavis777

[somerandomdudelmao]

I wanted to thank you, I may not articulate this correctly but I feel it is important to thank you.

Mainly I wanna thank you for Uncle Tello, it's very hard to find adult representation for autism and he is just so visibly autistic! It's fantastic! He has low empathy and he is an emotional core for the story (at least I feel he is) and the relationship he has with Casey Jr. and his family is amazing, they understand each other and it's just so refreshing and layered.

Tello gets to be so open (at least I think he is not masking), the character you made makes me want to be more open about being visibly autistic, makes my heart warm. Just... thank you so much for that.

(Also, I spoke to my 63-year-old mother about your comic for an hour and now she wants me to read her every update, you have a great way to tell stories!)

Ah thank you:3 Autistic characters have always been interesting to me, but people often make them...how should I put it? Excessive? Like...when you look at a character and realize that the author tried to cram in every glaring sign of autism that they could think of.

What I like about Rise Donatello is the fact that he is just ..allowed? in being autistic. No one emphasizes it, no one talks about how OH nO he's sOO diFferent. He just lives his way and his family lives with him and I try to portray that in my comic as well:)

[byeolbeloved]

Letters to Cupid -Kang Yeosang

Pairings> soldier!yeosang x typist!reader

Genre> childhood friends to strangers to lovers, angst, fluff, use of flashbacks, slightly suggestive, setting takes place around 18th century

Summary> for centuries, women named cupids worked as typists to write letters on behalf of senders who couldn't write themselves. You were always the writer but never the receiver for a love letter, yearning to be picked up by a knight. What you didn't expect was for this knight to have a familiar set of eyes, only this time lost from the innocence they once had.

Words from pupa : This fic is inspired by the anime Violet Evergarden! Also note that the writings in small italics are meant to be flashbacks. I had so much fun writing this so I really hope you enjoy it <3 The picture is also fanart I made myself hehe so I hope you like that too ^^

The typewriter clicked away, following a warm melody of the woman reminiscing her adventures with the other piece of her that is now battling the screams and horror of man. The warm scenery of her words contrasted the thunderous roars outside. The weather had no mercy on lovers under the moonlight.

"Please tell him I love him and I'll always be waiting for him" the woman said glass eyed. 

She's a gorgeous woman, with light make up and well done hair, although judging from the purple under her eyes you can tell she's had restless nights, tearful even, by her pink nose that was already prominent as she walked through the door. 

You always thought about how hard it must be to have your lover be in the military. You've seen many cases of these couples working as a typist. You had at least 10 letters a day of women writing to their husbands on how badly they miss them, some not knowing their ashes have become part of the land they fight to protect. 

"He will appreciate this letter dearly, Elenor. I will make sure to send it out by Friday" you say with a smile embossing a wax seal on the letter.

"Oh thank you Cupid. I was never good at using the typewriter so when an old friend told me about you I practically came here as fast as I could. It's been a month since he's been away, we've never been separated for this long.." 

"It must be so hard for you both. He'll be just fine El... I see the love in your eyes, he'll come back to them"

Education was a privilege, hence the reason why so many people were illiterate. For centuries women named "Cupids" wrote letters on behalf of senders who weren't able to write to their loved ones themselves or simply didn't know how to express their emotions on paper. It started from a voluntary organisation but has now turned into a whole company, well known throughout the land. 

You were born into the world of literature. Your father was a writer and your mother was a book illustrator. Work being the opening chapter for their own love story. From the moment you were born, books heavily dominated your life. Literally. Because even from the scene of your birth, where your mother delivered you unexpectedly at the house you grew up in, you were wrapped in ripped pages from books- that being the first thing they could grab instead of a blanket at such a chaotic scene of panic. 

You grew up with your mother reading you books and you accompanied your father while he wrote. Although you loved literature, writing your own book wasn't something you saw yourself doing. You much preferred experiencing a realistic event rather than coming up with a story, which is why you fell in love with this job.

You get to write true emotion while hearing another person's story and relationships. And you were clearly good at portraying what people wanted to express as you had tons of people personally asking for you to write for them.

Love; a topic you could rant on and on about. You dreamt about being picked up by a knight, running away from reality just to intertwine in each other's soul.  

However, you weren't such a hopeless romantic as you were very selective with the guys you talked to, let alone dated. No one has ever made you feel like a princess getting saved by the prince. Maybe reality isn't like the books, however, you felt that there must be someone in this lifetime who could make you feel like that.

The night was dark. Dark as the swelling wave of the ocean before the rising winds, when it bends its head near the coast. Rain fell hard against the concrete floor and the wind was so sharp it could cut you. 

The girl shut her eyes, trying to count sheep to calm her heartbeat but the sound of the rain only pictured her sheep drowning in the night alongside her.

"The rain won't get us here" spoke the boy, flashing her a smile that emphasized the pink red mark by his left eye. The red mark he told her was from a kiss from cupid after she pointed out how it looked like a heart. They were under the awning of a closed store.

"The rain is scary Yeosang" she frowned.

"It's only water" he held his hand out to the rain and let it get wet "see? I'm fine" 

"I know but I don't like the noises" 

"Then don't listen to the noises. You can just listen to me" he wiped his wet hand on the side of his pants and grabbed onto hers.

"I will protect you from the rain. I promise I will always hold your hand when it rains Y/N"

“Sorry I’m late, I just finished up with my last client for the day. Did I miss anything?” you place down your coat on the chair back.

“Only Jia swooning over mailman Tony again” Sakura chuckled while sipping her coffee.

“Seriously, when are you going to make a move? He might be single” Maya continued mouthful with a sandwich.

“Oh shush there shall be no romance at work. We have a business relationship and that’s how it’s going to stay. Now let’s get started with the meeting so we can head home before the weather gets worse.” Jia snaps and everyone hides their smiles at her shyness.

“Okay, this meeting is to just remind everyone about plans for next week. We will be accompanying commander Chan- everyone remembers him right? From last year. We will be writing letters for his unit, he has a different unit now. Make sure to pack warm clothes sinc-”

“Since there will be lower temperature in the North” Sakura and Maya said together in a monotone voice. “We’ve done this before Jia we knowww~” Sakura whines.

“Just relax and look out for the hot single soldiers” Maya giggles to Sakura who is now poking at Jia’s side.

“Business! This is business guys! We're going there for work. Plus, these hot guys are depending on us to bring back their messages to their families. No fooling around” Jia makes clear.

Once a year your team will visit military camps to write for soldiers. You’re usually there for 3 days excluding travel. Apart from some of the men being touch starved and looking as if they’ve never seen a woman in their life- most of them are really nice. Last time they even set out a mini farewell and thank you party before your departure.

The crisp sound of snow beneath your feet and cold sensation on your nose definitely woke you up from your nap on the way here. It actually felt quite nice, your surroundings bright from the white snow despite the sun not yet risen and the cold air felt like a splash of water to your face in the early morning. All nice except for the sound of Sakura and Maya’s whines from how their boots weren’t fit for the snow. This is exactly why Jia spent so much time whining about clothing. 

The soldiers shared cabins or tents. You girls too got your own cabin to share- unfortunately quite small so you’ll have to put up with Maya’s snores throughout the night, however big enough for the 4 of you. The main area had its own cabin. That’s where the soldiers mostly hang out and eat. 

As you girls made your way to the main area, commander Chan introduced you to everyone. There seemed to be at least 40 men in there, thankfully all divided into units so it was easier to organise when you’ll be working with who. 

Everyone gave you a warm welcome. You girls spent the first hour chatting with some of them, or you could say flirting for Maya and Sakura, before going into your cabin and unpacking your stuff.

Everyone was really sweet. Two soldiers, a long haired guy with a mole under his eye and another slightly taller than him with a dorito-like physique showed you around the area and let you know the schedule for breakfast, training and lunch. The area was quite open, you could see yourself getting comfortable here as it was very quiet. However, during all this you felt a pair of eyes on you. Though looking around you never saw anyone who could be staring.

“Slow down Yeo! It’s really rocky here” the little girl pants, trying to keep up with the energetic boy in front of her. He’s practically waddling like an excited maltese dog that’s about to get a treat.

“Just a little more, come on!” he grabs onto her hand speeding up her steps, now reaching his pace.

The two youngsters reach the top of the hill, overlooking the dazzling sight of flowers in different shapes and colours spread out across the field. 

The girl lets out a gasp eyes sparkling “This is… what you wanted to show me?”

“What do you think?”

“Yeo this is…. Beautiful” her eyes scan across the field, completely forgetting the distant yelling from her mom she was worrying about 15 minutes ago from why she took so long to get back home after school. 

“It’s gorgeous” says the boy, but he’s not looking at the scenery of flowers. He’s looking directly at her. Swimming in the ocean of her sparkling eyes reflecting the warm colours from the sunset. 

You are gorgeous he thought to himself.

The day was busy. Each unit who was on their breaks got their letters done and even though it was only day one, you managed to get lots done already. It was already pitch black outside and everyone was already tucked into their cabins.

Maybe you were still in work-mode but your body had no intentions to rest as you couldn’t stop tossing and turning in your bunk bed so you decided to take a step outside. You walked over to a corner with bright pink flowers contrasting the white snow, standing tall and so youthful.

“So beautiful…” you whispered, crouching to touch the soft pedals. They look like they have just bloomed. 

“Cyclamen” a deep voice from behind you startles you, letting out a light yelp from you as you turn around quickly. Your yelp almost turns into a loud gasp as you quickly identify the figure owning that deep voice. 

His hair is a light chocolate brown, long enough to be tucked behind his ears but not in a I haven’t thought about cutting my hair type of way- it was well maintained. He was taller than you but not enough so that you’re practically looking up. His body was clearly fit, arm muscles very prominent even from his camo print thick jacket. His skin was pale. So pale it looked like milk. So pale it emphasized the pink mark by his left eye.  

Kang Yeosang.

You had no doubt this was the same boy who used to have thick pitch black hair, sometimes patchy bangs from the self haircut his sister used to give him. The same boy who looked at everyone with sparkly eyes and clapped his hands together when he laughed. 

This was your Kang Yeosang.

“Those flowers are Cyclamen” he said expressionless, hands in his pockets. 

You don’t know if it's the cold air drying your eyes or your overwhelming emotion but you start to feel tears forming, so hot and full of sentiment they almost burn your skin. “Yeosang…?” you whisper but it comes out shaky. 

“They mostly bloom in cold weather” he says, still in the same stance.

“Are there any more flowers around here?” you sniffle out tilting your head.

“I’ve seen snow roses around here before. Would you like to see them with me someday?”

“I’d love to” you said with a smile, now earning a smile from him.

He takes his hands out of his pockets and steps closer to you, pulling you into a hug which you gracefully accept, your arms latching around his neck almost a bit too tight. 

“Hello Y/N” and that's your breaking point. You start sobbing into his chest muffling out I miss yous to which he responds with a hand on your head, caressing it gently. 

“I’m here”

The walk was quiet and heavy. Each step representing minutes lost from each other.

The girl is the first to break the icy silence “can’t you wait at least till next year? We just graduated”

“Y/N this isn’t my choice to make, I don’t have any other choice. It’s what I’m supposed to do” the boy says against his wishes.

“When will I be able to see you again?” the girl now looks at him glass eyed.

“I don’t know” he lowers his head but quickly looks at her holding her hand. “Hey, no matter how long it will take, I will always be here, yea? I promise Y/N”

“Please don’t break that promise Yeo..”

The following days you and Yeosang were practically glued together when you had the time. You caught up on each other's life events and even reminisced about your childhood together. It was almost like you were kids again, except you noticed how serious Yeosang is now.

You don’t expect him to have that same innocence as he had when you were younger. He’s a grown man now and also a soldier. Not a particularly happy go lucky type of job. However, apart from teeth smiles while covering his mouth with his hand, you haven’t heard him laugh yet. You missed it. You missed the days when you both ran around giggling at any little thing. Is that boy you loved, lost?

“But yea, let’s just say leaving a half opened can of soup in a tent for 2 weeks isn’t a great idea” he scratched his head and lightly chuckled.

You laughed at his stories with his cabinmates. So far he has only told you about silly fun stories with his friends, apart from him explaining the basic routine of what they do in training. You were glad he was able to make fond memories as a soldier, especially since you knew how nervous he was joining the military.

But something about you knew that wasn’t all. Has he really been doing well? What about the times he's been in battle? Has he been greatly injured before? Broken a bone maybe? Does he miss his family?

Did he ever think about you?

“Yeo…” you placed your spoon down. The main cabin was far too loud for both of you to have a conversation so you and him chose to stay in his tent for breakfast and dinners. His cabinmates barely stayed there unless it was for sleep so you had all the privacy you wanted. 

“How are you? Really”

“I’m doing well”

“No Yeo, I mean about everything. Do you like it here? Don’t you miss home?”

“Home? Well… Mom occasionally sends letters, I’ve visited sometimes but travel is so long I’d only have a day with them till I have to come back so… I’ve stopped visiting.” How long has it been since he’s had a home cooked meal?

“This definitely isn’t luxury heh, but I’m used to it Y/N. Don’t worry about me, I know what I’m doing here”

“Do you ever think about… me? Us?” immediately his gaze softens to your words. This is probably the first time you’ve seen a genuine expression on his face since being here. His hand is gently placed on your thigh and he brings his face closer to you. 

“Of course Y/N, I told you I’ll always be here. I promised” his eyes burn into your soul and your gaze meets his birthmark. Your finger moves by itself and goes to gently touch it.

“I don’t see you anymore Yeosang… everything is so different”

“I know. It’s hard. This is all very hard but we are going to work this out Y/N” 

Your faces are so close together you can practically taste his breath. His eyes land to your lips and for a second you could see the pupils of his eyes grow. He slowly breaks the space between you and you close your eyes, expecting to feel a touch on your lips  until he breaks off the moment with a whisper “I want to write a letter.”

“I don’t understand thissssss~ let’s just take a break” 

“We’ve already taken 2 breaks. Here, I started the first step for you, now remember what we did for question 6, it’s basically the same thing” the boy hands her the sheet of paper.

“Yeo I appreciate your help but maybe this is a sign from god that I should just give up on Math” the girl slouches on her seat kicking her feet.

“Math isn’t that hard, you just need to focus. Now come on we still have 5 pages left.”

“5 PAGES!? I might as well throw myself off the window” 

“If you finish this in the next hour” he leans in close to her ear “I might give you a kiss” he leans back to his chair with a smug look on his face.

You’d think the girl wore face paint on her face from the deep red that was now formed. Without a word she picks up a pencil and writes away on her paper. 

“Damn you Yeosang”

Some people get frustrated with slow walkers in front of them, slow drivers or even someone talking way too calmly, but the way Yeosang is working the typewriter makes you want to snatch it from him and do the job yourself.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to write the letter for you?” 

“It’s fine I got this” he continues on with his slow pace.

“Who are you writing that letter to anyway?”

“Just someone”

“Who is just someone?”

“A person I know”

 “Who is this person you know?”

“You don’t know them”

“Pleaseee Yeooo~” you lean in closer to him “I’ll give you a kiss if you tell me who” you giggle remembering his little tactic he used to use on you in school.

“Mmmm I’ll think about it” you huff in frustration and he laughs. 

He laughs. 

Your worries of losing the boy you loved dearly completely vanished as you finally see that innocent boy back. His laugh sounded like the doorbell of a childhood house, where kids would run to see if daddy is home. The last bell ring at school, when kids ran home to show mommy what they drew. The sound of the ice cream truck song amplifying as it rolled up from down the street. The clicking sound of riding your first bike, parents cheering in the background for balancing without training wheels.

He sounded like childhood and you felt like a child again. 

In what felt like forever, Yeosang finished his letter. Sealing the paper into an envelope ready to be read by this mystery person you so badly wanted to know. 

“Okay I’ll take it and make sure to send it out. Make sure to write the address.” you reach your hand out but he doesn't move.

“Oh no I want to keep it”

“What?”

“I want to keep the letter.”

“What do you mean? Don’t you want to send it to that person?”

“Not yet.”

 “We can withhold it and send it at any given time you want”

“It’s fine, I’ll send it myself”

Him protecting this letter made you even more curious as to who it was for. Surely he didn’t just write something for fun. Who was this friend? Was it a girl? Or possibly a lover? Surely not. Especially not when he almost just kissed you a while ago. 

He promised. You’re just overthinking. Right?

It was your last day with the soldiers. You only had a couple of letters to finish and by nightfall you and the girls were set off to travel back home. Absolute no bone in your body wanted to go back home. This meant being separated from Yeosang again and you weren’t ready to let him go yet, you only just reunited with him.

“Y/N, you have a visitor waiting” Maya points to the door, only to see Yeosang waiting for you. 

“I have a few more letters to write th-” you’re shushed by Maya when she lightly shoves you out of the room “Don’t worry, we got this, you go enjoy your last moments with lover boy” she whispers the last part although Yeosang surely heard judging by the way he looked away.

“Ooo he’s a shy lover boy too” Maya says before closing the door, you can still hear her giggles through the wall as you’re now left alone with Yeosang.

“Shall we go?” he quietly says. 

“Yeah, where are we going?” 

“You’ll see”

The two of you slowly walk side by side, occasionally bumping the sides of your arms. There isn’t much talking but the silence is comfortable. Almost too comfortable that you forget this is the last time you get to examine his features before the final goodbye for god knows how long it will be again.

You’re snapped out of your thoughts when Yeosang hands you a big white flower, a snow rose. “This is the snow rose I told you about” he said with a smile gently handing it over to you.

“Yeos-”

“Marry me Y/N”

What.

Time stops for a second. A long second. Even the birds stop chirping and the wind halts. You aren’t sure what just happened but your heart knows for sure that it’s a big deal as it beats so hard, destined to break out of you and reach his own, intertwining with his and merging into one. 

“What did you say?” you mutter quietly.

In contrast with your tone, Yeosang is confident. His chin is up high, shoulders back and there's a look in his eyes that show no sign of hesitation. 

“I want you to marry me Y/N” he takes a step closer, and another, and another, till you’re now backed up into the rough surface of a tree.

“I’m going to make this work, I’ll find a way to leave this place if I have to but Y/N, I can’t let you go again.” he cups your face gently and swipes his thumb across your cheek “I’m done keeping promises and making you wait, I want to be with you Y/N, only you” he rests his forehead against yours.

“Come home to me Yeosang” you breathe onto his lips before locking them together. 

Your lips dance together so full of passion and need it almost feels as if your bodies are intertwining into one. You feel his small smile through the kiss as you deepen it, locking your hands in his hair while his explores the sides of your body.

Cold air hits your belly as he lifts up your shirt to slide his hand against your skin, caressing your chest. If you weren’t so lost in the kiss you would have noticed that he was practically spelling his name across your chest with his hand movements.

Remembering that you both need to breathe, he’s the first to break the kiss. You’re both a panting mess but he manages you let out a chuckle “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“Yes in every language Yeosang. I will marry you” you smile out taking in his lips once again.

You asked for a rose, but Yeosang gave you a whole garden.  

Two years later

“Tell me Cupid, what should I tell her? I’m so scared. What if she’s waiting for another man?” the man from across you says, blowing his nose into his now 8th tissue in the past 10 minutes.

“Sir Walker, you clearly love her right?”

“Yes! Oh heavens more than anything, I-I’d kill for her, I’d crawl on my knees for he-” he sighs taking a breath “I don’t imagine a life without her”

“Then fight for her” you say softly.

“She’s lands away from me Cupid! How will I be a man to her if I cant even reach for her?”

“Make that happen. You said you would kill and crawl for her. Put actions to your words Sir Walker and show her you love her. You are living in the same lifetime, right here, right now, don’t regret your choices and lose her. She needs to see you fight for her” 

The man breaks down but looks up at you again, composing himself before saying “Have you experienced love Cupid?”

“Everyone experiences love. If not now, one day, just as you wait for love, there is another person waiting for the same. Everyone has someone awaiting them” you softly smile. 

“I’ll do it. Tell her I’m coming to get her. I’m not sure when but from today onwards, she will be my focus” the man lets out a broken smile. Broken yet mendable.

“She will be waiting for you Sir Walker” you say before typing away, a paragraph that awaits a new chapter for the couple.

Your night ends with that heartfelt love story. You hope the best for the couple and your heart nearly breaks with his as you also can’t help but think about your person you are waiting for. 

The weather outside is mean. Almost in hopes of drowning man in its rage. The thunder roars and you’re left counting sheep in your head- something you’ve been doing ever since you were a kid to calm down. 

As you’re walking out of the building Jia calls you from behind “Y/N you have a letter!”

She runs up to you and hands you the letter. “Who is this from?” you ask as you’ve never received a letter before. 

“Hm not sure” she looks into a room, clearly distracted by something, or someone as you look at the direction only to see the famous mailman who has been working here years before you joined the company- Tony.

“Um yea I’ll see you tomorrow Y/N I gotta go, bye! Let me know who that letter is from!” she says from a distance practically skipping her way to Tony,

You don't get the chance to even reply to her before she's gone. You look at the letter and there is no address to indicate where it was sent from, which could only mean this letter must have been dropped off by the sender here at the company.

You walk out the building, still sheltered from the awning covering you. Your steps are heavy, unable to move.

It's fine Y/N let's take this slow you thought to yourself deciding to just stand there for a while before making your way home.

You curiously open the letter and start reading it;

Dear Y/N,

How are you? I am writing this letter to you while you are right next to me. I hope you’re not mad about almost kissing you and asking to write a letter instead. It’s just that I wanted to capture my feelings towards you at this given moment, so we can hopefully both look back at this letter.

You asked me if I liked it here. I don’t. I hate the feeling of knowing every movement I make can be my last, and that I won’t be able to say my final goodbye to you. I hate that I go to sleep at night, responsible for another lost man from his lover. I wish I could be able to come home from work and tell you about my day. But what can I tell you? About how many screams I heard? How bloody my hands are after every battle? 

You asked me if I think about you. My answer is yes. Painfully yes. I always think about what you could be doing at any time. If you found yourself love. I worry everytime it rains, do you have anyone to hold your hand during thunderstorms? I force myself to repeat your voice in my head because I’m so afraid of forgetting what you sound like. I always remember about the day I took you to the flower field. You looked so beautiful in that moment. So everytime I find a flower, I make sure to stop and admire it, pretending it’s you. Because to me, you are far more beautiful than any flower out there. 

I will come home to you Y/N. I promised I would be there. I promised to hold your hand. And I will fulfil my promises, even if it means fighting for my life. 

Wait for me my love.

Love,

Yeosang. 

“Damn you Yeosang” you chuckled out, a crack in your voice causing tears to slip out. You look up to the sight of the man in reason for these tears. He’s still wearing his uniform, hat covering half his face. He seems to have gotten bigger in physique too. He drops his hat and you smile widely at the sight of his birthmark, now holding smiling eyes.

“It’s raining” he said, reaching out a hand “I’m here to hold your hand.”

You completely ignore the extended hand and crash your body into his for a tight hug. An embrace with no chance of him slipping out. 

“You came home” you said into his chest.

“I came to stay” 

“And to hold my hand” 

“And to hold your hand” he laughs out.

Yeosang was your childhood. Yeosang is your home.

[another-lost-mc]

Hii, first of all, i love your writing 💕 and I hope you're doing well.

How do you think the bros would react watching the movie Se7en?

I think it would be interesting to see their reactions since the theme surrounds the seven deadly sins.

a/n: I love this movie! I re-watched while I worked on this since it's been a while. I wrote the blurbs in order of the sins as they're portrayed in the film.

➤ watching the movie se7en | the demon brothers

1k words | x gn!reader | nsfw | violence and dark/disturbing themes, demons thinking about demon things, movie spoilers

BEELZEBUB | the gluttony scene

Any other time, he'd be joking that if he had to die, he wants to die eating. He understands that now's probably not the best time to tell you that.

He feels a bit sad for some reason. He's not sure if it's the poor bloke's death on screen or the movie's gritty atmosphere in general.

Ravenous hunger has its downsides, but most of the time he enjoys eating food. He can understand why being forced to eat would be emotional and literal torture for someone.

He knows he could eat that much pasta without breaking a sweat, but he doubts it would be comforting to you so he doesn't say it out loud.

He wonders how much he'd have to eat for his body to break down in protest of finally being too full, but he keeps that to himself too.

MAMMON | the greed scene

It's not a horror movie but the dark vibe still gives him the creeps.

He hasn't had to look away (yet) but he tucks you closer to his side so you can cuddle. You can hide your face in his chest for the gross parts if they bother you, he won’t tease you.

He sorta gets an inkling about the greed motif— something about a scummy lawyer and money trading hands is his first guess about why this guy was targeted.

Eh, close enough.

There are a lotta ways to kill someone with greed without actually killing them, y’know.

(He doesn’t wanna talk about ‘em though. He doesn’t want you to think badly of him.)

BELPHEGOR | the sloth scene

What the actual fuck.

He was feeling a bit sleepy watching the movie up to this point, but he's not anymore.

He understands the interpretation of his sin, but he's surprised to see such an ugly version of it in a human world movie like this.

If he senses that you're uncomfortable, he tries to distract you until the scene ends.

Now seems like a great time to pause the movie so you can both get up and get a drink, or stretch—or maybe go for a nap if you're tired and don't want to finish it right now.

(He's going to make sure you don't have bad dreams after this.)

ASMODEUS | the lust scene

He's had custom sex toys made before, but something like this? Yeesh.

Literally fucking someone to death seems so brutal, so unromantic. This isn't how he would do it, but he doesn't tell you that; he doesn't want to scare you.

(If he had to kill someone using his sin, he'd fuck them before ripping them open from stomach to sternum.)

(If he had to kill you with his sin, he’d make love to you until you eventually fall asleep. Your death will be instant and painless before he cuts out your heart and eats it.)

He notices that this part of the movie made you squirm in your seat more than the others so far.

Maybe a warm bath and cuddling in his bed will help you relax once the movie's over. He’s suddenly overcome with the urge to hold you.

LUCIFER | the pride scene

It feels anti-climactic compared to some of the other portrayals of sin so far, but he appreciates the simplicity. He was afraid it would be needlessly gruesome like the others.

Pride is insidious, the mother of all sins, the first deadly bloom that causes all others to fester and rot on the vine.

He can’t help the way his mind wanders after this. As an angel, he tried to resist sin. As a demon, he embraces it. Humans are weak and he knows for many, pride is their downfall.

You might not believe you could be pushed to make such a fatal choice, but Lucifer senses the way your own blend of pride lingers within you too.

He keeps silent about those thoughts and he wraps his arm around you for the rest of the film.

LEVIATHAN | the envy scene

He’s unusually quiet. He doesn’t complain or whine about how boring it is, and he doesn’t reach for his handheld either. Sometimes he looks puzzled by what’s on screen, and other times he seems contemplative.

He’s a little surprised by the ending. Speechless almost. He understands envy, but to do all this?

And the part with the wife, well...he thinks it's just a bit of an overreaction, don't you?

He can’t help but glance at you once the movie's over. He thinks about life before you and life with you now; he can't imagine life without you in it anymore.

Would he be capable of that type of jealousy if you didn't choose him? If he had to watch someone else live their own happily ever after with you while he suffered alone?

Huh.

When the movie ends, he distracts you with an impromptu game night in his room and he cuddles with you in his tub after.

His tail curls around your leg as you drift off to sleep, and he realizes he'd do so much worse just to keep you by his side.

SATAN | the wrath scene

For the most part, he's been less interested in the portrayal of sins. He's totally wrapped up in the mystery aspect of the movie instead.

Throughout the entire film, he's muttered under his breath about certain things he noticed or his guess about what might happen next.

(He’s read all the books mentioned in the library scene too.)

He figured that the cop with the short fuse was going to be involved somehow with wrath. He actually thought the character was a bit annoying.

He does sympathize with the cop's behaviour at the end—all he has to do is think of someone hurting you and it makes him seethe with rage.

The reveal about the wife caught him completely off-guard but thinking about it later, it seems so obvious.

[dragons1re]

Trigun is a very autism media to me. The twins themselves are full of amazing metaphors for autism!!

The plants wings are a physical metaphor for autism! To me Rem’s and other humans fear of seeing Vash’s overtly autistic traits is shown in their reactions to his wings. We see Knives isn’t afraid of showing off his plant powers ever. The twins have a very cool dichotomy about masking-Vash was favored because he masked, while Knives never cared to.

When Vash and Knives see Tesla Rem goes to comfort Vash first. This seems to be slightly on favoritism, but also because she’s shocked that Vash is having a large emotional reaction. I think the fandom sees Vash as hyper-emotinal and Knives as hypo-emotional, but to me it’s switched.

Knives does not hide his emotions. And absolutely does not hide his outbursts! He has meltdowns all the time and is not ashamed of his autistic traits(Edit* this comment is in reference to Knives using his plant powers with no restraint, compared to Vash who almost never used his powers. I agree that Knives isn’t exactly a bastion of positivity about his autism, and hates his lack of control, that being said he isn’t ashamed of the traits themselves, just his lack of control over himself). He doesn’t care about being unsettling or being accepted by humans/neurotypical society. (Even more interesting to consider that all of the Gung-Ho Guns are disabled/neurodiverse in some way). Knives allows his emotions to control him, where Vash is guided by his obligations. He does what he wants, based on his wants. And what he wants is to be with the only other autistic person he knows-his brother. He also desperately wants his brother to be free from his internalized ableism and the pain of masking.

Vash on the otherhand spends all his time masking and denying his autistic traits so he can fit in with “normal“ humans. He also again, in contrast to Knives, acts based on how his mother told him to behave. He hates acting out/standing out. He still operates on Rem’s instructions to be “normal“ and unnoticeable. He does occasionally show strong emotions but they’re not his positive emotions. To be these are less examples of Vash being over emotional, but instead are examples of outbursts. The overflow of negative emotions reminds me of my meltdowns! As well most of the emotions we do see Vash show are also parts of his masking. They are deeply constructed displays of emotion. All set to Vash‘s derived sense of what’s normal. It’s what he thinks positive emotions look like. His mask is baked into everything he does. And only one person sees through it-Wolfwood!!

Wolfwood is also set apart by the narrative. He has been modified. In my view this is the story portraying that Wolfwood is also neurodivergent in some way. He is capable of seeing through Vash‘s mask, and from Vash‘s reaction is the first one to call him out on it. He also goes from being afraid of Vash‘s autistic traits-his wings-to supporting him. His last words are him encouraging Vash to express his emotions genuinely(to not worry about his “unsettling“ autism smile).

Trigun as a media deals to deeply with disability and autism(if someone remind me I’ll make another little essay thing about Meryl and Milly‘s autism). I hope this is coherent!!

Anyways! Happy Autism Month!!

[serfergs]

I have to give a shout out to The Only One episode 8 for (well a lot of things), but what specifically stood out to me. I’ve seen some posts about how BL has recently really botched child/parent relationship and characterization. I feel like these kinds of relationship dynamics are so nuanced and very difficult to portray realistically. I really liked that we got to see the conversations each of the boys had with their respective parent. They were both mature, respectful, fairly honest but still kept their parents at an arms length. Both their approaches were also consistent with Tian and Weng’s characters. Weng initiated the conversation with his dad and was focused and direct, but still sympathetic to his dad’s decisions around marrying Tian’s mom. Tian followed suit but was much more hesitant to speak to his mother and said just enough to reassure her.

Then I realize that both conversations revolved around reassuring and comforting their parents. As someone who has recently been forced to confront my parents for the emotional neglect and trauma of my childhood I related to this so much. Tian and Weng don’t hate their parents, but they still have to reckon with the consequences of their parents’ actions. Tian always keeping his bag packed and choosing to self isolate out of self preservation. Weng desperately seeking out intimacy. These are things they are forced to deal with and it sucks that instead of feeling safe enough to have a vulnerable conversation about the ways their parents decisions fucked them up they had to defend their decision to move to the school dorms while reassuring their parents that it had nothing to do with them as parents. This show understands the nuanced and complex feelings that exist between strained child/parent relationships. This show understands that for the child sometimes you have to placate your parent because it’s not worth the breath to explain no I don’t hate you, but I wish you’d acknowledge your role in my trauma and my need to set boundaries because of it. You love your parents but you’ve been taught that you can’t completely trust them and therefore they can never truly be home.

Which highlights why the ending of the episode was so beautiful. This slow burn show has paced itself in such a way to build an incredibly solid and realistic portrayal of the foundation of intimacy that I don’t think I’ve seen in other BL. Yes I swooned and giggled at the initial enemies to lovers trope but it’s truly become so much more than that. I believe in not just their attraction, not just their hidden or not yet fully realized crush, but their deep, hopefully, life long companionship.