#reddington: continuity errors

[ouamotw]

Okay. This file creeps me out...maybe we don’t want to figure out the redacted version of  Félicien Sansregret?? Still, a former agent of B.O.E.U.F.  now moved to B.E.E.F. ....in his post mortem recruitment.... 

[equalseleventhirds]

heyo, the motw podcast i'm part of (formerly once upon a monster of the week, recently renamed welcome to reddington) is currently recruiting players and gms for its sister twitch show, continuity errors. knowledge of the podcast (or the previous season of the twitch show) is not required; as the name suggests, continuity is... malleable.

the high concept of the entire CE show is that characters are wandering between universes (and between game systems/game masters), and shenanigans & adventures ensue. last season was a little bit sliders; this upcoming season will take place on a weirdly dimensional train. ....yes, a little bit infinity train, no, not quite infinity train, but we do all love a fucked up train, don't we? also multiple game systems, also weird universe-hopping shenanigans, also.... or is that just me?

applications can be found here, and they close in about a week, so please do apply!! gms would need to run one game, and players would need to participate in at least three of the total six sessions planned (more always welcome ofc). the final schedule will depend on player & gm availability; we're flexible and down to work with what you're able to do.

this would be a volunteer show, as unfortunately we can't afford to pay anyone for this, we're just hoping to have a good time playing games together. i in particular want to help introduce people to some new and fun game systems with new and fun people to play with!

if anything in the application is a barrier to you (equipment, gaming experience, timelines, etc) send me a message and i'll chat with the production team! as noted this is purely volunteer and mostly for having fun, so we'll be as flexible as possible to help you join us. (some things won't be possible, but we'll at least see what we can address.)

ETA (for clarity): this casting call ends on April 30, 2023. also while we may play motw for one of the games, the plan is to play with a whole bunch of different ttrpg systems (different one each session); as noted this is a sister show to the motw podcast, and runs a little differently than the podcast does.

ETA2: applications extended through May 1, 2023. GM applications in particular are low, so very encouraged! feel free to reach out to me with any questions, concerns, or if you'd like help with your application!

[raymond-reddington-ruminations]

Thoughts on 10.11, no spoilers.

Ahhh, nice episode!

I was worried through the first half of it. We had story A, and story B, but I was really wanting story A.5. Fortunately we did get it.

During that first half I was getting frustrated with Ressler and Dembe. It felt like there was a point where they could have just gone home, and their issue would have been solved naturally. Why did they have to keep pushing? Once the danger was over, communications would be resumed.

As always it's the character interactions that really make me love this show. Herbie being the voice of wisdom several times was golden, especially when he mentioned Red. Panabakers' last scene, where she still surprises me. I wish she was in the show more. Her scene partner did not surprise me. That was entirely in character.

And Siya getting a more personal story, but not one we saw coming. I wonder if it's going to be a story just for her, or if it will connect back to our other characters.

I did note the one little continuity error when Siya mentioned her sibling.

And then there's Agnes, and Reddington's relationship with her. He said something to Agnes that I'm not sure we've ever heard him say to anybody, not in all these 10 years.

I can imagine some people might want to criticize Dembe's role in this episode. I will say this. Just because you know hang around with a magician, doesn't mean you can stand up on the stage and perform the show yourself. So I really don't have any qualms about what Dembe didn't do.

All in all, this was kind of a feel-good episode for me. Which is hilarious. None of this would be described as typically feel good material. Ressler certainly isn't feeling good about it.

I would say that a lot of episodes this season are comfortable, not high drama, not twisting me up in frustration. It's nice. I would watch a show like this. The endless frustrations of the first eight seasons didn't need to be as extreme as they were to keep me invested. I do just love and enjoy these wonderful characters being themselves.

Edit; I am absurdly happy to know a price tag for Reddington's clothing.

[alyblacklist]

I saw the cast list for episode 21. I know the general response to it, lot of Redarina vibes. However two other things stood out to me. The first thing is young Liz Keen. I don't see Sam on the list, Masha changed her name while in his care. I do see young Constantine so shouldn't it be young Masha Rostova? The second thing that I noticed is that there is no mention of a young Ivan Stepanov. Yet we know he knew KR. Curious to know what you think about these two points.

You would think it would be young Masha Rostova, right? Especially since Keen is Liz's married name. But I wouldn't read too much into what is listed on the cast list after Cerone claimed a "continuity error" as the reason why Katarina flipped back and forth on calling her husband "Alexander" and "Constantine" in Requiem when prior canon suggested he only adopted the Alexander Kirk name long after Katarina and Masha were out of his life.

I am not sure if anyone has commented on it yet, but the one thing that did strike me as immediately curious is that the actress they cast to play "Young Liz Keen" (Aria Kane) has brownish/green eyes not blue. Megan's blue eyes are one of her most distinctive features and after they've made such a big deal out of people thinking Liz looks her mother because of her eyes, and after casting two blue eyed actresses to play young Masha/Liz in the past it strikes me as odd. I find it hard to believe that in all of New York City and its surrounding areas, they could not find a brown haired, blue eyed child to play Young Liz. Maybe they'll put in blue contact lenses for the episode or only show her from a distance (like in the deleted scene of Liz and Sam on the beach in Cape May) and the point will be moot.

As for Stepanov, we did see in the behind the scenes a man who looked very much like Stepanov walking in front of Lotte. However, this was clearly not during active filming because of the crew members walking with them so it's possible that they were simply walking to the same location for Lotte to film a scene in the 1980's past and Stepanov to film a scene in the present/very recent past. It's also possible the cast list is incomplete or they felt they could adequately de-age Stepanov with some makeup. I really have no idea. Maybe we will find out that "created Reddington" is young Stepanov and that he played the role of Reddington temporarily. It could be a complete coincidence that both actors are trans, or it could not be. The mind spins!

[cally-002]

22 QUESTIONS

Thanks @sunlit-music for tagging me

Book that transformed your life? Harry Potter, without a doubt. I've read the books at least 4 times and am so deeply immersed in the world. I love it so, so much

Movie that changed your way of seeing the world. I've seen so many movies, but I'll pick... damn, this is difficult, umm... I'm going with Narnia. It helped to cement my belief that real magic exists in our world, not just in stories

Music that makes part of the soundtrack of your life? Black Veil Brides, especially In the End. I love them so much and I'm soo happy that they're rereleasing We Stitch these Wounds.

Define longing: an unquenchable desire for a feeling that you've only had a drop of before

If you could go back in time, which scene would you visit in your life? My childhood. I miss those days of bliss.

Place where your heart is. Currently? Harry Potter, with Fred Weasley. It's crazy how much you can love a fictional character.

The travel of your life. I loved visiting Paris. It's beautiful there and I felt at home, even though I'd never been there before.

Author you have met recently and whose works you want to continue reading. Haven't met many authors... except for a few of my friends

Coffee or tea? Coffee, but I like both

Who's your Doctor? (If you don't watch Doctor Who, whose your fav character from a TV series) I've only watched 1 season of Doctor Who, so I'm going to say Raymond Reddington, from The Blacklist. I love him. I find him hilarious, even though he's a little mental.

If you could throw away everything and live your dream, what would you do? Travel. Do everything possibly

If you could choose to be a character from a book, TV series or movie, who would you be? Captain Jack Sparrow

What makes you not like a story? Bad writing. Grammatical errors. I immediately pick up on them and I can't focus on the story.

Do you like romance in stories, why? Yes. It's the thing I long for most in life.

Which book did you hate having to read? The Dreamhouse, by Craig Higginson. We read it this term in school and it's. So. Boring.

Which movie did you hate having to watch? Atonement, another movie we had to do for school. The main character's moral compass is sooo off. I hate her so, so much

Do you like anime/manga? Never watched either.

Who's the best villain you've seen in a story? Grindelwald from the Fantastic Beasts series. He has a knack for appealing to the public- he says that he just wants wizards to be free, yet he hides a darker objective.

If you could choose any person in our world to do an interview with, dead or alive, who and why? Bear Grylls. I looked up to him so much a few years ago and I'd love to meet him.

If you could meet and befriend a writer, who and why? I don't remember the author, but they wrote 'My Bubblegum Klutz' on Wattpad. I loved that book.

Cats or dogs? Dogs, but I don't mind cats

If you could choose any time period or society to live in, which one would your choose? 1800s. I love those times, the balls, the dresses, the romance... I swear I lived then in another lifetime, I just have such a strong pull towards then.

I'm tagging @indiedreams @fyp-psychology @yoursummerdreamz

[meetmeatthecoda]

Surprise!

@scifi-gk, I’m your Secret Santa! :D I know you’ve been going through some tough times recently but I hope you can still have a wonderful holiday and maybe this present will help with that a little! :) Much love to you and yours! <3

Just a quick word (lol as if) about your fic before I post it below: I took your prompt to heart, specifically the bit about the “shift that needs to take place within their dynamic”, and things got a little out of hand... I ended up writing just over 10k 0.0 To make that shift happen, I ended up writing a lot of mythology which is something super new to me but I know you have an affinity for! That being said, I did absolutely zero research and just kind of drew my own conclusions for shit so if I made any blatant canonical errors, I’m very sorry, just consider it an AU :’D So yeah, in addition to the mythology, there’s just a metric shit-ton of angst and drama and feelings which I felt were pretty necessary to get that shift down and then the last segment was the hardest part but also the scene I had specifically in mind when you said you wanted a believable first kiss ;) So yes, if you can wade through all the freaking drama, there is kissing at the end! :D Anyway, this fic was something new for me and I’m pretty unsure about it but, regardless of my feelings, I REALLY REALLY hope you like it and it’s an enjoyable present for you! :D Happy Holidays, my friend! :) Much, much love! <3

Everything has gone to hell.

It started with a phone call from Jennifer and her hushed words over the bad connection, “It’s time, Liz,” sending shivers down Liz’s spine. But she set a meeting with Red at his safehouse before she really knew what she was doing and texted Jennifer the address, sending the message with something like dread reverberating within her. She drove through the cold winter air, running a red light or two in her frazzled state, watching a few small snowflakes fall halfheartedly, melting as soon as they touched the pavement.

Not sticking.

And now, they’re here, waiting for Jennifer to arrive, and Liz’s gun is pointed at Red and he’s on his knees in front of her.

And the worst part is that it’s not the first time.

He’s looked very calm since she burst into the room with her gun drawn, maybe a little surprised and definitely curious, but calm. She tries to access that too-familiar well of anger she has stored up for him, that well that should be overflowing at the sight of his nonchalance, but it keeps eluding her. All she really feels is cold.

Numb.

When he saw her gun drawn, his eyes tightened a little, but he nodded solemnly and set down the book he was reading before she burst in, rising from his armchair.

“What have you found out, Lizzie?” he asked calmly, a mere query, as if he were asking her about the weather.

Liz didn’t bother questioning his assumption. He was right, of course. Why would she be on the rampage with a firearm if she hadn’t discovered something incriminating?

“You’re an imposter,” she blurts now, letting go of the ugly truth she’s been holding like a dark secret inside her for weeks, no pomp and circumstance, just lets it out. “You’re not the real Raymond Reddington. You’re not my father, or Jennifer’s. You’re a…pretender,” she hisses the last word, finally finding a little anger and betrayal from somewhere to throw at him.

(He’s hurt her so badly. It’s like Tom all over again.)

“Yes,” he says simply, as if he’s not rocking her entire world by admitting it. She had accepted it as the truth from the minute she looked at the DNA results, but she can feel now that there was a little nugget of desperation inside her that hoped he would deny it and explain everything.

(That would be a first.)

“Would you be amenable to hearing me out? I can explain things to you, once and for all, since you’ve discovered it on your own. And perhaps you could lower your gun?”

She blinks, taken aback by his reasonable suggestions, and she finds herself wanting to comply, wanting to trust, as she’s done many times before. Her gun wavers and lowers an inch or two.

Trust…

(The memory of Tom punching her in the face flashes before her eyes.)

Liz jerks her gun back up, trying to ignore the trembling in her hands. “No,” she spits. “No, I can’t do that.”

“All right,” Red says easily. And Liz watches as he slowly and carefully lowers himself to the floor, bending his knees until they touch the wood, holding Liz’s gaze the entire time.

Something aches inside her.

She should love this. She should revel in the victory of having the imposter prone before her. She should feel joy.

(But she really just hates this.)

“Are you sure you won’t listen? Just five minutes, Lizzie, that’s all it will take,” he tells her quietly.

That’s it, she wonders, that’s all it will take to explain her whole existence? Is she really that trivial?

(Yes.)

“No,” she repeats forcefully, telling herself as much as she’s telling him. “We have to wait for Jennifer to get here.”

“Jennifer?” his voice is sharp now, a cold tone of surprise, and she sees the skin below his eye twitch before he smothers it.

Ah.

Liz knows that he’s worried now, wary. He doesn’t know Jennifer, not like he knows Liz, he can’t predict what she’ll do, doesn’t know how to sway her.

Liz feels a frisson of fear go through her at the realization. Jennifer is angry. Jennifer is vengeful. Jennifer is unpredictable.

Oh.

But Liz doesn’t have time to ponder the implications of this before the door is bursting open once again and she whirls around to see her half-sister, eyes wild, holding a gun of her own, now trained on Red.

Oh.

(What has she done?)

“Jenn—” Liz starts to speak but Jennifer takes no notice, her eyes glinting with a dirty kind of pleasure at seeing Red there on the floor.

“On his knees already. Well done, Liz,” she smirks, a nasty thing that contorts her pretty face, darkens her eyes.

(Liz is reminded forcefully of Tom, no familiar glasses, all unobstructed cold eyes.)

“I –” Liz starts again but she doesn’t make any more progress.

“Well,” demands Jennifer loudly, speaking to Reddington now. “Liz and I have discovered you. And we want to know the truth, all of it. And then we’re gonna kill you,” she spits the last part and the vulgar words having Liz choking, afraid.

They never talked about this part. Sure, it was implied – mostly by Jennifer – that harm would come to Reddington once they gathered as much evidence as they could and confronted him. But Liz hadn’t thought about it. Perhaps she hadn’t allowed herself. Her primal need for the truth had driven her to this point but it prevented her from looking beyond.

Does she really want to kill Red?

She breaks her frozen gaze from Jennifer and turns back to him, now looking much tenser, his face and eyes tight, gaze cold, and back rigid.

(He looks scared.)

No. No, she doesn’t.

“Talk!”

Jennifer barks it, loud and unexpected, scaring them all. Liz jumps, her hands shaking around her gun, and she sees Red’s hand instinctively twitch towards the small of his back, reaching for the holster Liz knows usually rests there, the one she now sees on the table across the room.

He is unarmed.

And of course he is, he was expecting her after all, Lizzie, not an ambush from both of his angry pseudo daughters.

(No. No, no, no.)

Liz remembers that he made no such defensive move when she burst into the room, angry and scared. He didn’t try to defend himself. He saw no need because he trusts her. Seeing him glaring at Jennifer now, the difference is stark. He feels no affection for her, this girl, this comparative child. Liz feels her heart pound.

(Red trusts her, loves her. The look in his eyes is proof enough. And she’s betrayed him. Again.)

She has to do something.

Liz tries to think, desperately trying to come up with a way to distract Jennifer, just long enough to talk some sense into her, maybe she can –

“Fine.”

Red’s voice immediately distracts her. He’s going to talk. Explain. Tell them everything.

Finally.

And without further ado, he begins.

“Your father, Raymond Reddington, was involved in covert ops for the United States government. He had a wife, Carla, and a daughter, you, Jennifer, before he was asked to go undercover to Russia to gather intel from a double-crossing Russian agent, his CI. Your mother, Lizzie, Katarina.”

Liz feels a shock, warm and sudden, as Red meets her eyes.

“Little did he know,” Red continues, “she was already entangled with the Cabal. But as Raymond Reddington became more involved with the situation in Russia, things became more dangerous for his family in the U.S. and Carla entered the witness protection program with you, Jennifer. As things progressed, R—”

“Wait,” interrupts Jennifer. “Did mom talk with you, I mean, the real Reddington, my dad, before she went into witness protection? I was so young, I don’t…” she trails off, her brow furrowed.

“No,” answers Red calmly. “Carla suspected an affair between Reddington and someone he was working with in Russia and was resentful of all the pain he had put their family through, as well as leaving her alone to care for you, as young as you were at the time. Carla up and left and, as far as Reddington was concerned, you two had all but disappeared.”

“That’s why you didn’t know where they were,” whispers Liz, the pieces fitting together slowly. “Reddington didn’t know, so you didn’t know.”

Red nods once.

“But why did you want to find them if they weren’t your actual –”

“I was curious,” states Red dispassionately. Liz can feel Jennifer stiffen beside her. “And the real Raymond Reddington would have stopped at nothing to find them both. I had to stay in character.”

“But,” splutters Jennifer, and Liz glances over to see tears are leaking from her eyes. “I – So – Dad didn’t abandon us? Mom always made him out to be the bad guy!”

Red looks at her evenly. “That depends on what you consider abandonment. Carla certainly felt abandoned. Reddington dedicated more time to his mission than his family. Not to mention he had an affair with Katarina, hence Elizabeth.” Liz watches Jennifer’s lip tremble as she listens. “But who’s to say that he didn’t come to his senses when they disappeared. He may have regretted his thoughtlessness. I don’t know.”

“How can you not know?” shouts Jennifer suddenly, tears falling outright now. Liz feels a surge of adrenaline as Jennifer whips an arm back to wipe carelessly at her eyes, barely missing the trigger of her gun. Too close. “I have to know – how did – didn’t he care?”

She’s shouting now, furious and frustrated, and Liz feels a pang of sympathy. Jennifer has had much longer to stew in the mysteries of her past than Liz has. And, as Liz knows from experience, the not knowing is the worst part. Now she has the opportunity, Liz doesn’t blame Jennifer for pushing to know more.

(They must get their tenaciousness from their father.)

“Jennifer,” Liz says softly, trying to placate, but Jennifer jumps anyway, whirling towards her, gun and all, and Liz sees Red lurch forward on his knees, the first time he’s moved since Jennifer entered the room, with his hand outstretched as if to stop her. The unexpected motion has Jennifer turning back to train her gun on Red, conflicted and scared, and now it’s Liz’s turn to panic.

“Jennifer,” she says sharply. “You know that’s all he can tell you. You have to let it go now.”

“What,” she spits. “Are you on his side now?”

Liz’s heart stumbles.

“No,” she says, her voice trembling, the untruth burning her face. “But you’ve heard what you wanted to hear and I’m still waiting. You said we’d do this together. It’s my turn now.”

She sees Jennifer grit her teeth, annoyed but hearing the truth in her words.

“Fine.”

Liz wastes no time, turning back to Red immediately and finding him already staring at her with a curious expression. “Keep going,” she says urgently, desperately, and he nods after a brief moment.

“With Carla and Jennifer effectively removed from the situation, Reddington threw himself into his mission with Katarina and, as I said, things developed between them. They began an affair and she became pregnant with you, Lizzie. However, her husband, Constantin, was a loyal Russian agent, a dangerous one, and was unaware that Katarina was seeking asylum in the United States. Her desire to immigrate became even more urgent when you were born, Lizzie, and Katarina had to pretend you were Constantin’s daughter.”

“That’s why he came looking for me as a genetic match, he thought I was his,” Liz inserts the information she already had into the intricate tale Red is weaving, her eyes drifting as her mind moves a mile a minute. “But you persuaded him that I wasn’t…” Then she gasps, and her eyes fly back to Red. “You told him the truth, didn’t you? That I am Raymond Reddington’s daughter as he once suspected but his revenge was lost on you, since you aren’t…” she trails off, still having trouble disassociating Raymond Reddington from…well, Raymond Reddington.

“Yes,” Red affirms. “And I made sure he was eliminated afterwards. No one that I don’t implicitly trust can be told the truth and survive. It’s necessary to maintain the illusion.”

“What else?” Liz breathes, drunk on all the knowledge he’s giving her, more than he ever has before, afraid that he’ll stop and close off, return to the unreadable enigma he’s always been.

“The Cabal would only grant Katarina asylum if she brought them compromising information on Russia, which she finally managed to do when you were about four, Lizzie. She obtained the Fulcrum and fled Russia with you in one night, leaving Constantin, who had since begun to suspect Katarina and become dangerous to you both. Raymond Reddington escorted her to the house where everything changed…for all of us.”

“The house that caught fire,” Liz whispers, fully ensconced in his story, her story.

Their story.

“Wait,” Jennifer interrupts again, and Liz can tell she’s still interested, despite herself. “You keep saying ‘Raymond Reddington’ as if he’s another person and that’s because you’re referring to our actual father. But you haven’t mentioned yourself yet, so where do you come in? And how do you know all these things if you weren’t there yourself?”

“I was briefed on all of these events after the fact by reliable sources, after I assumed Raymond Reddington’s identity.”

Liz feels another shock go through her. This is the first time he’s said it outright like that. Blatant. Honest.

“You can trust my telling, it’s all true. And, to answer your other question, I’m about to enter the story. I was an up and coming naval intelligence officer while Raymond Reddington was in Russia. I was a hard worker and loved my job and, as a result, I rose to the top of my branch fairly quickly. Because of this, I was approached by the Cabal, masquerading at the time as a special branch of the military that needed my services. I considered it an honor to be asked to serve. I thought I was doing something worthy to serve my country. Little did I know the rampant politics and collusion that I was walking headfirst into.”

Liz can hear the bitterness in his tone, the regret and anger at the government he was once loyal to. She can easily imagine a younger Red – except he wasn’t Red then, no, he was someone else entirely, and god, her head hurts – as intelligent and driven as he is now, just more starry-eyed and hopeful, eager to please, only to have his whole life turned upside down by an evil organization intent only on serving their own interests. Liz absurdly feels her throat tighten at the thought.

“I was recruited and thrown into the situation in which Reddington and Katarina now found themselves. The Cabal –”

“Wait,” this time it’s Liz that is interrupting him, her tone slightly guilty but desperate. “Didn’t you have your own family? In your file, it says you abandoned your wife and daughter on Christmas Eve but…” Liz trails off, confused, and watches his eyes darken and pain take over his countenance. She suddenly regrets asking.

“Yes, I did,” he murmurs. “The Christmas Eve story in Reddington’s file is true. That was what happened to my own family, my wife and daughter, when I discovered what the Cabal truly was and attempted to reveal them. I disregarded their threats and…they killed my family. After I assumed Raymond’s Reddington’s identity, I changed the identities of my deceased wife and daughter to those of Carla and Jennifer to help protect them. That’s how I met Mr. Kaplan, actually.”

“Why?” demands Jennifer, chiming in now as the story returns to her personal history.

Red turns to look at her. “Witness protection is not infallible, Jennifer. Reddington had, and as a result I have, very powerful enemies. If they all believed you’d been killed, that was another layer of protection for you.”

“But why?” Liz asks in a much different tone, her eyes feeling wet. “Why would you make it look like your family never existed? Didn’t you –”

“They were both very loving and generous people, Lizzie,” he interrupts quietly, his eyes looking suspiciously wet now too. “I think they would both be happy to know that their deaths weren’t completely pointless. That they helped someone else somehow.”

A single tear escapes his long eyelashes and falls to the floor.

(And Liz feels the insane urge to lay down and cry at his feet, this man who sacrificed everything he held dear for people he didn’t even know.)

Red clears his throat roughly. “But by the time Katarina and Reddington made it safely to the United States, the Cabal assumed Reddington was more loyal to her and her daughter than the Cabal and sent me in to kill them both and obtain the fulcrum. I far as I was concerned, my family was gone, and I had nothing left to live for. I was weak and followed their orders blindly.  However, the Cabal was wary of any changing loyalties and sent a team with me. When we arrived, I ordered them to hold position outside while I snuck in the house undetected, hoping to catch Reddington and Katarina unawares. I arrived just in time to hear them fighting over what to do about the Fulcrum.”

Red looks directly at her now, intensely. “They were very much in love, Lizzie, from what I understand. They were just having a disagreement over how best to handle the situation and, ultimately, protect you. You were there though and only about four years old and you didn’t know Reddington was your father. You only knew Constantin at the Summer Palace, that’s why you had such strong memories of the place. You didn’t know Reddington was your father, Lizzie, and he was fighting with your mother. You just wanted to help.”

His expression is earnest now and she can tell how much he doesn’t want to hurt her by telling her the truth. She feels tears rolling down her cheeks now as she nods at him. “How did it happen?”

Red swallows, closing his eyes for a moment before continuing in a hushed tone. “There was a gun, I’m not sure whose it was, probably Reddington’s, one he had carelessly abandoned. You had lived among spies and traitors long enough in your short life to know what a gun did. I watched from the shadows as you took the gun and pointed it, too quickly for me to stop you, there wasn’t any time, I couldn’t get to you in time –”

He seems desperate for her to understand this, and she can see the guilt weighing on him, her Atlas, trying to hold up the world for her, because he feels he owes her for what happened.

(She’s seeing him more clearly than ever.)

“It’s okay,” she’s whispering, shaking her head. “Keeping going, it’s okay.” And she can feel Jennifer looking at her oddly, but she ignores her because their story isn’t over.

It’s just beginning.

“You shot him,” Red gasps, a little exhale that has her hurting inside, even though she already knew what happened that night. She’s feels like she’s reliving it with him. “He died instantly, you must have hit a vital organ, and Katarina screamed. The gunshot tipped off the team waiting outside and they…they set fire to the house. They must have had other orders from the Cabal. Thinking their job done, they left. You ran off, frightened, and hid somewhere. I went outside and tried to put the fire out from there, but it caught too quickly. Knowing you and your mother were still inside, I went back in. Even though it was my directive to kill her, I couldn’t leave her to burn. Somehow that was…worse. I could hear her still there crying over your father’s body, but by the time I had returned, the flames had blocked off the room and I couldn’t get to her. I made the choice to leave her and search for you. I assumed she died in the fire until I later found out she survived the fire and, thinking you dead, walked into the ocean at Cape May. I don’t think she ever knew you survived. I tried to save her Lizzie, but I couldn’t find a way to get to her. She couldn’t hear me over the flames.”

A curious look glazes over Red’s eyes. “Fire is as loud as it is hot. I had no idea…I didn’t think that it…” he trails off, lost somewhere in the past until Jennifer shifts impatiently on her feet and he seems to snap out of it.

“The fire was bad by this point, everywhere, bringing the house down in places,” he continues haltingly, and Liz can tell immediately that he’s editing something out. Her throat is too clogged with tears to stop him. “I couldn’t save Katarina, but I knew you were still somewhere in the house and…I couldn’t leave you. You were just a child. I searched and yelled for you and soon I heard you screaming from inside a closet. Miraculously, the fire hadn’t reached you yet, but we didn’t have much time. I pulled you from the closet, you and your stuffed bunny, and we…escaped.”

So, he saved her. Liz must have always known on some level because she feels no true surprise at the revelation, just a calm acceptance. Some unidentifiable feeling is trying to push through the tears clogging her up, but she shoves it back, unable to handle anything else right now.

“I took you to Sam,” he says on an exhale, and Liz can tell the worst of it has passed. “He was my good friend from our military days and I didn’t know what else to do with a child. The Cabal was after me at this point for directly disobeying orders and I couldn’t take you with me, it was too dangerous. Besides, Sam always wanted a daughter.” He looks up to give her a watery smile and she lets out a small huff through her tears.

“I know,” she murmurs. Sam had often told her as much.

(God, she misses her dad.)

“I hid out for a few days,” Red’s saying now. “And thought everything through. I felt responsible about what happened to you and your parents. I soon decided that, with no family of my own left, the only thing I could do was try to fight the Cabal to create a safe future for you, in case they ever figured out who you were. My only goal was that yours was the last family the Cabal destroyed.” A dark fire enters Red’s eyes at his last words and Liz knows that this desire still burns within him.

(That’s the Red she knows, a dark harbinger of vengeful justice.)

“But I had nothing and no one to help me and it didn’t take me long to realize that Raymond Reddington many more contacts and resources than I did. So,” – the nonchalant shrug he gives here is almost hilarious – “I became him. We already had the same basic facial structure, body type, hair color – all things I considered signs that I was doing the right thing, though obviously they were just coincidences – and I had a few changes made to become a passable likeness. I didn’t have to do much, considering Reddington had been a top-secret agent, uncover mostly, and no one truly knew what he looked like. He was a ghost, a shadow, a rumor. So, I learned as much as I could about him and adopted some mannerisms but, mostly, I remade him. Created a new Reddington and built a criminal empire, making connections and calling in favors, running from the Cabal and trying to dismantle it from a distance.”

Red looks up at this, gazing somewhere over Liz’s shoulder in slight wonder. “The strangest part is, no one questioned it. It’s amazing what people will accept if you believe it yourself. Besides, I’d always been a good actor.” He meets Liz’s eyes then, curiously tentative and unsure. Afraid.

It hits her then how much he has just revealed, everything he has told them, things he has only trusted with a select few, and she wonders if she knows who he is anymore. She enormity of it all makes her head spin and she just blinks back at him, unfocused.

“Is that all?” asks Jennifer abruptly.

Red turns to her, his gaze hardening. “Yes.”

Jennifer glares at him long enough that Liz wonders what she’s thinking.

(What will she do?)

“You had no right!” she explodes suddenly, her eyes wild again in an instant and Liz feels cold dread settle in the pit of her stomach. “You sullied our father’s name, changed who he was, made a criminal out of him! You as good as killed him!”

The gun in her hands is shaking now and Liz is afraid. She understands though. Jennifer’s had comparatively little to do with this whole mess but everything she has learned tonight is shocking. Her father, whom at one point she thought was still alive and standing in front of her, betrayed her mother, may or may not have regretted it, had a child with another woman, and died an accidental death at the hands of her bastard half-sister, entangled in the politics of his job and the complications he created. Before now, maybe Jennifer had been holding onto the insane hope that her father was still alive somewhere. And even if not, Liz is sure she was holding onto some vain hope that he had good reasons for doing what he did to his family.

(Jennifer wants so desperately to forgive him.)

But, finding him irredeemable and nothing but more anger in the truth she’s wanted for years, she’s near homicidal. The only one here to blame is Red. And she’s got a gun.

“Jennifer –” starts Liz for what feels like the hundredth time tonight, but Jennifer is shaking with rage.

“No!” she yells, glaring at Red. “It’s all his fault! If he hadn’t – he shouldn’t of – he can’t –” But she’s too upset to form words, baseless accusations, desperate blame-placing, and the only thing she can do is cock the hammer of her gun with a damning click that sounds like a bomb to Liz’s ears, and point it at Red.

Red.

“NO!” the yell is ripped from her before she even knows what she’s doing, and she’s moved to stand in front of Red, who’s still defenseless on his knees, and suddenly she’s staring down the barrel of Jennifer’s gun.

(How, oh how, did she get here?)

Liz meets Jennifer’s eyes over the gun, which has lowered slightly in surprise, and watches as confusion colors her face, some of the anger seeping out.

“What are you doing, Liz? Get out of the way!” she yells. “This is what we’ve been waiting for!”

“No, Jennifer,” Liz says firmly. “This is what you’ve been waiting for! I never agreed to this!”

“What are you talking about?” she demands, incredulous. “He’s the reason our father’s dead!”

“No, he’s not!” Liz says, her voice rising. “He’s not and you would understand that if you calmed down enough to think!”

Jennifer grits her teeth and scowls at her. “Well, he as good as killed him! And it doesn’t even matter, he deserves to die after everything he’s done!”

“You’re not the one that gets to decide that, Jennifer!” yells Liz. “And he’s saved my life too many times for me to just let you kill him like this!”

“What do you like him now?” sneers Jennifer. “Has he become the daddy you always wanted?”

Liz feels anger spark hot embers inside her and she glares at Jennifer.

(She feels Red shift slightly behind her at Jennifer’s words.)

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Jennifer,” she says lowly, seething. “Don’t make me hurt you.”

“Oh, you’re gonna hurt me, Liz? Your own sister?” she taunts, heedless of her warnings.

“Half-sister,” Liz corrects nastily. “And I will if I have to. You need to walk away.”

“Why the hell would I walk away?” screams Jennifer, truly losing it now. “I’ve been waiting for years to get my revenge and I’m not gonna let you stand in my way! What incentive do I have to leave right now? And even if I did, I’d just find another way to get to him!”

“No, you won’t,” snaps Liz, an idea occurring to her that gives her hope. “Do you have any idea how many people you’ve killed, both indirectly and by your own hand, in pursuit of evidence against him?” she jerks her head backwards towards Red.

Jennifer blinks. “So?” she demands.

“I work for the FBI, dumb-ass!” snaps Liz. “I can implicate you in so many murders that they’ll put you away for life. Is that what you want?”

Jennifer’s guns wavers. Liz has her.

“I’ll make you a deal. As long as you stay far away from Red and I, just walk away and leave us, you’ll stay in the free and clear. But only as long as you do that. If you come near us again, if you ever try to hurt him, I will personally pick out your prison cell. Understand?”

Jennifer grinds her teeth, furious, looking for a way out and, not finding any, puts her gun down with a frustrated scream.

“Fine, Liz, stay with the imposter, the traitor, if that’s what you want, I don’t care! Just know that you’re no sister of mine! And you –” she leans around Liz to point fiercely at Red, making Liz lift her gun warningly “– know that I will never forgive you.”

They stare each other down for a long, tense moment before Jennifer whips around and storms out of the room, gone.

There is a long moment of nothing while Liz stares after her, feeling empty, numb, until she hears Red stir behind her, standing slowly.

He waits a moment while Liz reels inside before he speaks.

“Lizzie?”

She can’t say anything.

“Lizzie, I –”

And she feels his warm hand tentatively touch her cold one from behind, startling her to her core and she whips around, feeling her breathing start to speed up, her eyes wide. Red remains frozen, watching her warily with concern, and she just stares blankly at him for a moment.

There’s only one thought echoing over and over in her over-saturated brain as she looks at him.

“I don’t know who you are anymore.”

It’s a whisper, broken and tearful. Scared.

Red looks at her sadly.

“Yes, you do.”

He matches her, tone for tone, and it’s too much, something breaks inside and she’s spinning for the door, with a wordless groan.

“No, I have to leave –”

“Lizzie –”

“Leave me alone!”

She slams the door behind her, running from him, terrified and alone.

And she doesn’t know if she’ll ever stop.

Liz doesn’t remember getting back to her house – she suspects more traffic violations were involved, dark roads and loud car horns in the swirling snow – but when she becomes aware again, she’s sitting on her bathroom floor with her arms wrapped around her knees, rocking.

Everything she knew, everything she learned, everything that’s real to her now is crashing over her in waves, trying to sink her, and she’s just barely treading water, kicking her feet wildly, trying to keep her chin above the water line of everything that is too much.

Her father and her family and her history and her past and –

She’s pulling at her clothes now, yanking her shirt over her head and kicking out of her jeans, desperate to be free of the restraints, and stumbling towards the shower. Yes, a shower will help, hot water fixes everything doesn’t it?

(But she already feels like she’s drowning, so why is she heading into deeper water?)

Liz sets the water to the hottest it will go and turns her face up, her eyes closed and her thoughts racing.

She was the product of an affair, as she suspected, and supposedly there was love between her parents but who really knows? She’ll never be able to ask them because she killed her father and her mother – well, Liz is responsible for her death as well, isn’t she? Oh god, she killed both her parents –

And Red.

Red.

He saved her from the fire. He saved her life because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time and his family –

It’s getting harder to breathe now, standing in the shower thinking about all this, and some voice in the back of her brain is telling her she’s quickly entering the throes of a panic attack, but she can’t stop it. She only manages to shut the water off and stumble out of the shower, tears starting to mix with the water dripping from her hair as she yanks a towel off the rack to wrap around herself as she sinks to the floor, gasping for air amid her sobs.

Red, the one she swore to destroy, the one she thought destroyed her life, is a victim of destruction himself. He did the best he could with the awful circumstances he was thrown into and he didn’t mean to, Red didn’t –

But he’s not Red. She shudders from the cold settling into her wet skin and she feels so violated. He’s a strange man she doesn’t actually know, and he pretended to be someone else to get close to her –

Wait. No. No, that was Tom. Tom did that. Red? Red cares about her. That much couldn’t have been a ruse, not with the way he looked at her tonight. The only person Red has been pretending to be is Raymond Reddington. Her father. But he’s still Red to her and Red loves her. But –

Liz can’t take it anymore, she’s gasping and crying, and she can’t calm down and the only thing she can think to do is reach for her discarded pants and pull out her phone, hitting number seven on her speed dial with a shaking finger.

He picks up on the first ring.

“Lizzie?”

“Red – please – h-help me –”

“I’ll be right there.”

And he is, like he always is, throwing open the door an unknown amount of time later to find her still sitting there crying, still huddled in her towel, still needing him.

“Lizzie –” he gasps and he's down on the floor within seconds, tearing his coat off and wrapping it around her, quickly followed by his arms.

And she's desperate for the warmth and comfort he has always provided her and she's turning her face into his chest, wetting it with her tears, mumbling indistinct phrases and words while he rubs her back and tries to calm her.

“I killed them both – how can I – oh god – and you – you saved me – you –”

“Lizzie, it's okay, sweetheart, you just need to breathe and get warm, it's okay, I've got you –”

She manages to get her breathing under control and stifle the tears long enough to look up at him, his hand pausing in its ceaseless stroking of her hair, and he looks down at her, concern and anguish plain on his face.

He cares.

Doesn’t he?

“Red?” she whispers, sniffling pathetically.

“Yes, Lizzie?” he asks desperately, worried.

“Do you care about me? Even though you’re not my father? Cause if you don’t, I don’t have anyone left, anyone at all, that cares – so please tell me you still – if you don’t – I can’t –”

“Oh, Lizzie,” he murmurs, rocking her gently. “Of course, I do, don’t be ridiculous –”

“But,” she hiccups, plowing forward, working herself up again. “We’re not related, I’m just some kid you saved from a fire. My parents are the reason your family died, if I was never born, you’d still have your wife and your daughter –”

And she’s starting to spiral again, the enormity of it hitting her all over again, just too much to comprehend, and Red knows it and he’s trying to help her, speaking quickly now.

“Lizzie, Lizzie, you can’t do that, don’t think that way, Lizzie, it won’t help anything –”

“How can you stand me?” she’s sobbing uncontrollably now. “I’m the worst thing that’s ever happened to you –”

And suddenly hands are gripping her face and he’s turning her around to face him, looking her so fiercely in the eye that she finally stops speaking.

“Lizzie, listen to me. None of what happened to me is your fault. If anything, you helped me stay alive for the past thirty years. You’re the only thing that’s kept me going through this never-ending battle. You have no idea how you’ve saved me, the things you’ve made me feel again, Lizzie, please – don’t doubt for a second – you must believe me – Lizzie, I adore you –”

He breaks off, biting the side of his mouth to stop himself, but his eyes are still speaking, burning at her in a way she’s seen a few times, but it’s never glared at her like this before.

(It’s near blinding but she can’t stop looking because it’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.)

And she’s been hanging on his every word, here on the bathroom floor, aching to believe him, needing something real to hold onto as badly as she needs air, and the words he’s forced into her ears have her gripping him back, watching his lips as he bites them, fighting at the strength of his emotion and some insane, uncontrollable urge has her surging forward, almost climbing up his prone body on the floor, completely heedless of her towel and his jacket, her hands going to his shoulders to steady herself as she moves to kiss him and it will be perfect, everything she needs right now, everything will fall into place, and –

But no, his hands are suddenly strong on her shoulders, pushing her away, not pulling her closer, and the thought has tears welling in her eyes yet again, because he doesn’t want her after all –

But he’s speaking again, just as urgently as before. “Lizzie, no, sweetheart, you’re not thinking clearly, we can’t do this, you’ll regret this later, Lizzie, please, don’t cry –”

And she’s sobbing again, her heart breaking in so many pieces she can’t even count and she’s choking out words. “You – don’t – want – me –”

But he’s holding her firm again and speaking in that same way, undeniable. “Lizzie, this has nothing to do with what I want, you have no idea, if only you knew how much I want you – but Lizzie, you just need to calm down first, that’s all –”

And she’s throwing her arms back around his neck in relief and he’s holding her but what’s that she feels, right under the edge of his dress shirt? She slides a shaking hand down a little further, any sense of discretion lost long ago when this suffocating waterfall crashed down on top of her, and she feels a curiously familiar texture the further down she goes and he’s tensing beneath her and oh no –

“Lizzie –”

It’s all very clear suddenly. This is the only thing he edited out tonight, that one small nugget of information he visibly held back, the thing that changes it all, because these are scars he suffered for her on that night –

(He gave her everything.)

And very abruptly it’s all too much. Lizzie feels herself starting to pass out with something like relief, her brain just shutting down, falling into blackness, and she’s so grateful that she can finally escape it all. The last thing she hears is Red calling her name and the last thing she feels is the odd sensation of being lifted when the rest of her is sinking downwards and she knows he’s taking her somewhere and she truly doesn’t care where.

(He can do what he likes with her.)

Liz wakes late the next morning, her eyes gritty and her sinuses congested, and for one moment she is blissfully unaware of everything that happened the night before. It takes a full minute for it all to come flooding back, hitting her with a physical force that makes her let out a lungful of air, and she turns her head into her pillow, trying to sink back into the darkness.

(She knows she can’t hide forever but can’t stop herself from trying.)

When that doesn’t work, she slowly pushes herself up into a sitting position, finding herself still wrapped in her now-dry towel and Red’s coat as well as tangled in her sheets. She kicks it all off and stands naked in her bedroom, about to head for the bathroom, figuring she should finish the shower that she never really started last night, when she hears a noise downstairs. There’s someone else in her house and she has no doubt that it’s Red.

(She’s not sure what it means that she knew the second she woke up that he was near.)

Not particularly bothered by the fact that he never left last night, Liz proceeds with her shower, taking the opportunity to think as she couldn’t last night, with a slightly more clear and objective head and some sleep.

She feels a bit more human by the time she’s scrubbed her face clean and washed her hair and when she gets out of the shower to dry off, she stops to examine her face in the mirror.

She looks awful.

Liz’s face is very pale and drawn, with dark circles under eyes despite the fact that she slept the whole night and most of the morning undisturbed. Her eyelids are heavy and swollen there’s very little life in her face.

(She supposes that’s what receiving life altering information does.)

Feeling no motivation to make her presentable, Liz simply draws her half-dry hair up into a messy bun and finds some clean, warm sweatpants and a hoodie, feeling slightly more protected this way.

(Protected from what, she doesn’t exactly know.)

Without further ado, she picks up Red’s coat and leaves her room, heading downstairs. She’s heard no more movement from Red, but she gravitates towards the living room, walking quietly in her bare feet and peeking around the corner to see him there.

He’s asleep, which surprises her, though she supposes it shouldn’t. He went through just as much trauma and emotional pain as she did last night, not to mention everything he had to deal with coming from her. He’s curled up on her couch, still completely dressed, including his shoes, looking small and cold. He has no pillow or blanket and she immediately feels ashamed.

(She couldn’t even manage to provide a blanket for the man who saved her life. She’s awful.)

Liz hurries over and gently drapes his coat over him. He doesn’t stir, and she takes the rare opportunity to kneel on the floor in front of him and stare at his face.

He looks younger when he’s asleep, his tan face relaxed and his jaw slack. Liz misses the expressive depth of his eyes, but she examines his eyelashes instead. How did she never notice how long and blonde they are? He’s a beautiful man.

And she immediately shoves that inappropriate thought out of her head. She can’t think that way, not about Red.

(As much as she may want to.)

She’s loathe to wake him but she knows they have to talk. And as painful as the subject matter is, she has a feeling she won’t truly feel better until they discuss things. So, Liz reaches out and very gently rests a hand on his cheek.

His eyes flutter open immediately, with no utterance from either of them, and she can tell that he’s instantly alert, looking directly into her eyes and nowhere else. There is silence between them for a long moment before he breaks it with her name.

(What else?)

“Lizzie.”

His voice is husky as well as deep in the morning and she shivers pleasantly at the sound of it before she manages to suppress it. She must stop that.

“How are you this morning?”

After everything that happened last night, and his first thought is still of her.

(Oh, Red.)

“A little better, thank you,” she murmurs. “I…I am so sorry about last night, Red.”

He frowns and is taking her hand from his face before she can move, turning it to cradle in both of his as he sits upright, his coat slumping off him onto the couch.

“Lizzie, you have nothing to apologize for,” he says, quiet but intense. “Yesterday was…too much. I would have been surprised if you weren’t overwhelmed. My only concern is that you’re doing better now.”

Liz’s eyes fill with tears at his kindness. No. No more tears. Enough of those were shed last night. “I am. Sleep and a shower does wonders for a person,” she manages a thin smile that he instantly returns. “Come on, I could use some coffee.”

She gently removes her hand from his and stands, heading for the kitchen. She hears him rise and stretch, following her a moment later and perching at the bar while she starts up the coffee maker and puts out mugs mechanically. Neither of them speaks while the coffee maker spurts and brews, some unspoken agreement keeping them silent while they wait for the coffee to brew, putting off the broaching of any sensitive topics.

Once the coffee is poured and their hands are wrapped around their warm mugs, Liz speaks.

(She might as well dive right back into the bottomless ocean Red dragged her out of last night. At least, he’s here as her lifeguard this time.)

“I…I don’t really know where to begin,” she mumbles. “But I guess the two most important things for me to say to you right now are ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘thank you’.”

She looks up tentatively from her mug to see Red frowning in disagreement and opening his mouth to speak. She waves to cut him off.

“Don’t. Just…let me talk, please. There’s some things I need to…say out loud.”

He purses his lips but nods, gesturing for her to continue.

“I’m sorry that I went behind your back, again, and conspired with Jennifer to hurt you. I was just…so angry at the things I found out and I couldn’t fathom just asking you about them. I should really know better by now.” She gives a little sad smile and shakes her head lightly. “I’m sorry for putting you in danger last night. I didn’t think far ahead enough to predict what Jennifer would do in that situation and…it was too close. We’re just lucky she left, and no one got hurt.”

Liz chances a look up at Red again and he’s just staring at her, with a solemn expression on his face and kind eyes.

(She almost can’t take it.)

“And as far as ‘thank you’ goes…,” Liz trails off and shrugs helplessly at him. “I mean, there’s literally nothing that’s happened in my life that I shouldn’t be thanking you for. I’m alive because of you. I had Sam because of you. And…I survived last night because of you.”

He has tears in his eyes now and honestly, so does she, but she refuses to let them fall. She has to be strong now.

“I’ll never be able to thank you enough,” she whispers ardently, looking him in the eyes as she speaks, and he shakes his head vigorously, finally breaking his promise to let her talk uninterrupted.

“Lizzie,” he breathes. “You have nothing to thank me for. If I had simply held true to my beliefs and stood up to the Cabal, your parents would still be alive. It’s my fault they’re dead, Lizzie, you should be furious –”

“Furious?” blurts Lizzie with a watery and slightly hysterical laugh. “Red, I’m the one that pulled that trigger. You can’t –”

“You were just a child, Lizzie!” He abandons his coffee mug to grab her hands and pull her close. “In no universe can you be blamed for what happened that night. I was the only other adult there, I was the one that should have stopped it all. I could have.” He lowers his eyes and his voice drops to a whisper. “Lizzie, you have no idea how many nights I’ve laid awake wishing I could change what happened. And I’ve been trying to make it up to you ever since.”

Liz’s throat tightens. “I know. And you have made it up to me. Hundreds of times over. Red, I don’t blame you for that night. Please believe that,” she grips his hands. “It was a horrible tragedy. And it could have been worse. I could have died. If you hadn’t been there, I would have. And that’s what I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to repay.”

To her surprise, Red smiles and lets out a wry chuckle, and the words he says next are ones that she’ll never forget.

“Don’t you see, Lizzie? Saving you was the only good thing I did that night. If you hadn’t survived, I would have had nothing to live for. Saving you was my salvation. And, while I’ll never be able to repay that debt, I will never stop trying.”

Liz can do nothing now but throw her arms around his neck, completely in awe. Red wraps his arms around her waist in return, pressing his face into her shoulder and inhaling. The warm feeling that goes through her feels so good it must be wrong, and she pulls back to look him in the eye.

“Looks like we’re never going to see eye to eye on this, are we?” she asks unsteadily, and he stares at her with a tender gaze, shaking his head slowly. Liz sighs in defeat.

And then Red surprises her by suddenly bringing a hand up to her cheek, much like what she did to wake him. The look in his eyes intensifies and becomes so captivating that she can’t possibly look away, his eyes burning through her helplessly.

(She’s afraid.)

Liz somehow manages to rip herself away from his gaze and his grip, moving away and returning to the safety of her coffee mug at the counter, feeling light-headed and uncomfortable.

“Well, what do we do now?” she asks breathlessly, not turning around.

It’s a tense moment before he replies. “What do you mean?”

“I mean…” she thinks for a moment. “Do we continue with the blacklist? We haven’t dismantled the Cabal yet and, now that I know your true motivation behind the mission, I want to help you.”

“Lizzie,” Red starts and she feels brave enough now to turn and look at him. “I don’t want you to help me because you feel obligated to. I need you to want it too. That’s the only way this can continue.”

“I do want to,” she assures him, and she can feel that inside. There’s a small flame that was ignited last night, somewhere underneath everything else that demanded her attention, a fire that burns to avenge her parent’s deaths. “Even though I was the one to pull the trigger that night, the circumstances around my parent’s deaths were out of my control. It all stems from the Cabal. And they have to pay.”

She can feel the fierce look on her face and he’s smiling at her proudly, a look that inspires her next words. “And, as I think we’ve proven time and time again…we make a great team.” She gives him a crooked smile that he can’t help but return, beaming at her and she feels warm again.

“All right, then,” Red says happily. “The blacklist will continue.”

Liz smiles triumphantly at him.

(She has an odd feeling that her parents would be proud of her.)

Liz turns back to her coffee mug, feeling tired all over again but still strangely energized.

And then Red surprises her by speaking again.

“I think there’s still one other thing we have to discuss, Lizzie.”

Liz freezes with her hands around her mug. She thought remembered something else happening last night, something she did that was potentially mortifying, but she’s been ignoring it until now, hoping it wouldn’t matter in the face of all their other issues.

(Silly her. It’s easily the most important thing. It always has been.)

“Oh?”

“Yes,” he murmurs. “Do you remember trying to kiss me last night?”

God, he just gets right to it, doesn’t he? What is she supposed to say to that?

“Vaguely,” she mutters, feeling herself redden. “I’m sorry about that, Red. I wasn’t in my right mind. I know it wasn’t appropriate and I understand why you pushed me away.”

There is a beat of silence where she holds her breath.

“You don’t remember what I told you, do you?”

Liz looks up at that, surprised. “No. Things are a little…muddled.”

He nods understandingly. “Lizzie, I didn’t push you away because I thought it was inappropriate. I pushed you away because you were in no state to go there and, frankly, neither was I.”

Liz stares at him blankly. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I have no objections to pursuing that now,” he finishes plainly, stating his words very clearly, as if it were completely expected.

(She stomps fiercely on the small flutter in her chest.)

Liz’s mind starts to whirl. She abandons her mug on the counter and hurries past him, starting to pace back and forth across her living room.

“Red, what –” she stutters. “What are you – are you crazy?”

(Back.)

He just blinks at her. “I’m sorry?”

Liz looks at him like he has four heads. “We can’t be together, Red!”

(Forth.)

He merely looks confused now. “Why not?”

Liz gapes at him. “You’ve been pretending to be my father for thirty years!”

(Back.)

“No.”

And his tone, suddenly sharper and very direct, all traces of kindness gone, make her turn abruptly to face him, ceasing her pacing.

“I’ve been pretending to be Raymond Reddington for thirty years,” he states, now moving towards her across the room. “There’s not a day in my life that I’ve pretended to be your father, Lizzie.”

(Her heart stumbles in her chest. Is he saying what she thinks he’s saying?)

“But – but –” she stutters, completely taken aback. “Other people – they’ll think –”

“What will they think, Lizzie?” he presses, moving slowly closer to her frozen form. “I’ve gone to great lengths over the past three decades to make sure that no one knows the true identity of your birth father. Any bystander would assume it was Constantin or even Sam. Or perhaps you never actually found out. People will believe what you tell them, trust me.” He chuckles dryly. “The only people on earth that know your father is Raymond Reddington are Jennifer and Dembe. Jennifer has been rather effectively silenced, thanks to you, and I think it’s safe to say that we both trust Dembe with our lives. Anyone who puts the pieces together – which is highly unlikely, if you ask me – could conduct a simple DNA test to find out that we are not related.”

The words are spoken with such emphasis as he advances towards her, passion evident in his eyes, and Liz can do nothing but stare incredulously at him, unconsciously backing up as he moves forward, starting to hear the logic in his words.

(It’s incredibly, beautifully, impossibly, dangerously tempting.)

“There is absolutely no genetic or societal reason why we can’t be together, Lizzie,” he continues fervently. “We know the truth. The only thing standing in our way is…preconceived notions.”

“Preconceived notions…” she breaths.

Her back hits the wall.

“I have feelings for you, Lizzie, and I have for a long time. Do you have feelings for me?”

He stops in front of her now, close to her, and her heart hammers at his proximity. Can it really be that simple? Can she allow herself to want what she’s denied herself for so long on baseless principles?

(Maybe. But she’s afraid.)

“Lizzie…”

He moves closer, placing his hands gently on either side of the wall behind her, not constraining her – he would never do that – but persuading her, gently trying to convince her to give in to what he knows is right. He’s murmuring sweet words to her, things she knows he’s always wanted to say and he’s leaning forward to ghost his nose down her neck and into her hair, smelling her shampoo and sighing happily.

Liz’s head thumps back against the wall, her eyes fluttering shut as lazy pleasure unfurl through her body at his ministrations, and she sighs helplessly, whimpering a little when his lips pass over her pulse.

(She wants him. God help her, she wants him.)

“Red…” It’s breathy sigh that she’s been holding in for longer than she knows, and he looks up at her, cupping her cheek gently and gazing into her eyes.

“Why not us, Lizzie? Why not us?”

And in that instant, everything clicks into place. Why not? Why not them? Why deny themselves this connection, this spark they’ve been ignoring for years? They may be unlikely and unusual but that’s what makes them them and they know the truth and the truth is that there is nothing inherently bad about them, nothing that can stop them. They are made for one another and how rare is it to find your perfect match? Because the minute they saved each other from the fire that changed their lives, their fate was as good as sealed. And if there’s one thing that rings true with Liz, it’s that fate can’t be denied.

She loves him.

(And the minute she admits it to herself, she feels more at peace than she has in the last six years.

She’s home.)

And he’s waiting patiently for her to decide and he’s been waiting for much longer than she realizes, and it feels better than anything she’s ever felt to say the word to him.

“Yes.”

The happiness and love in his eyes is everything to her and he wastes no time in pressing forward to touch his lips to her, taking in a breath against her lips as they meet and kiss for the first time, and Liz does the opposite, his perfect match, sighing in relief and wrapping her arms around his shoulders as they melt against each other.

(It feels wonderful to finally stop fighting.)

Red presses closer to her, using the wall to keep them anchored, and Liz leans against him, as she’s always been able to do, cupping her hands around his neck and trembling from want. It’s another long moment of intense feeling and being and living before Red gently pulls away and they stare at one another in shock at what they are together.

Liz can’t help but gaze at him in wonder, marveling at how they got here and how, against all odds, things have worked out for them, and she’s speaking softly before she’s truly digested everything.

(He’s always been the first to hear her thoughts.)

“Life is full of surprises, isn’t it, Red?”

Red lets out a quiet laugh, his warm breath wafting over her face and he just smiles and nods, stroking her hair lovingly.

“It is. I must say, I never expected to fall in love with you…” His thumb passes over her cheek. “But the biggest surprise…is you loving me back.”

Tears fill Liz’s eyes once again and she can do nothing more than kiss him again because why on earth wouldn’t she love this man? This selfless, pure, giving man who has spent the better part of his life rescuing her.

(She only hopes that they can spend the rest of their lives saving each other. Together.)

They continue to kiss, wrapped up in their warmth and newly accepted love, while the snow falls outside her window in the light of the setting sun, peaceful and quiet.

Tonight, it will stick.

[theresidentnews]

“Operator Error”

When a medical device fails on a former Chastain employee, an investigation is opened up, which pits Dr. AJ Austin against Quovadis. As Mina and Bell work to get to the bottom of what went wrong, Devon distracts himself with another patient who’s experiencing mysterious stomach pains. Meanwhile, Nic forms a bond with her new partner at the clinic (guest star Miles Gaston Villanueva) and Conrad’s relationship with the Barnett family (guest stars Evan Whitten and Daniella Alonso) continues to grow.

Original Airdate: January 21, 2019

Written By: Elizabeth J.B. Klaviter & Emily Pressley

Directed By: Timothy A. Good

Starring:

Matt Czuchry - Conrad Hawkins

Emily VanCamp - Nic Nevin

Manish Dayal - Devon Pravesh

Shaunette Renée Wilson - Mina Okafor

Bruce Greenwood - Randolph Bell

Malcolm-Jamal Warner - AJ Austin

Glenn Morshower - Marshall Winthrop

Jane Leeves - Kitt Voss

Guest Cast:

Michael Weston - Gordon Page

Daniella Alonso - Zoey Barnett

Evan Whitten - Henry Barnett

Joy Rovaris - Aubrey

Dan Martin - Floyd Washington

Miles Gaston Villanueva - Alec Shaw

Steven Reddington - Bradley Jenkins

Mike Pniewski - Abe Benedict

Melissa DuPrey - Marisol Garcia

Vince Foster - Paul Chu

Ian Gregg - Mason Buck

Ed Amatrudo - Fred Harris

Victor Love - Carleton Ward

More Cast

Promotional Photos

Press Release

Ratings:

Same Day | Live +3 | Live +7

Reviews

Promo:

Sneak Peeks:

Things Just Got A Bit More Complicated

[miss-musings]

The Similarities between TBL’s Red and Mr. Rochester, a.k.a. A Classic Byronic Hero

Several in the Blacklist fandom, myself included, have compared our protagonist “Raymond (Red) Reddington” (James Spader’s character) to the likes of Edmond Dantes and Mr. Rochester.

The reasoning behind this, other than sharing some parallel plot points (such as being a sailor, being labeled a criminal by his government, going into exile, wanting revenge and/or relief, etc.) … Red shares a lot of the traits of a Byronic hero.

According to the Wikipedia entry for the Byronic hero, various iterations of the character-type are described as:

“a man proud, moody, cynical, with defiance on his brow, and misery in his heart, a scorner of his kind, implacable in revenge, yet capable of deep and strong affection …a solitary figure, resigned to suffering … the “fallen angel” … [with a] violent temper and [capable of] seduction … [has] occasional outbreaks of remorse [that] reveal a tortured character, echoing a Byronic remorse … a remarkable blend of both villain and hero, and exploration of both sides of the Byronic character.”

Here are some other slides I found that give descriptions and examples of Byronic heroes. I take no credit for any of these slides:

Now, obviously, the Byronic hero is a bit fluid, meaning that not every single example of one fits every single characteristic in each description. But, I truly see Red as a Byronic hero. (I bolded all the traits in the description that I think fit him.) The Byronic hero is sometimes seen as the predecessor or primogenitor or at least the “cousin” of the modern-day anti-hero, which Red DEFINITELY falls into. He’s by all accounts a “bad guy” and yet we love him and we want him to win.

But in a recent post, I used the similarities between Red and a very early example of a Byronic hero, Mr. Rochester of “Jane Eyre,” as evidence for why I think Red is the romantic lead in our story, and why he and Liz getting together in some form or fashion (a.k.a. Lizzington) is the endgame.

Looking at it more closely, if we assume that Liz is Red’s love interest, as Jane is Rochester’s, more similarities and parallels become evident:

His love interest works for him in some regard

He is about twice her age

He sees her as his “second chance,” etc. (we’ll dive into that more in a second)

In comparison to the female protagonist and the other characters, he is considered to be very worldly and well-traveled

He travels, in part, to escape both his inner and outer demons

He was previously married and had several trysts and relationships with various women until meeting the protagonist

(Seemingly) flirts with his female acquaintances to make the protagonist jealous

Once meeting her, he becomes completely devoted to the protagonist, and has eyes for no other woman

One thing that has always struck me about Red on TBL is that, while we do get references to him being in relationships and having sex with women in the past, we REALLY don’t see Red engaging in relationships or trysts since meeting Liz in the pilot. Maybe he does it off-screen, and there is that shot of Luli in 1x05 where she walks through the room in one of Red’s shirts… but, other than that, NOTHING! Yes, he flirts. Yes, he makes sexy comments and allusions. Yes, he dances with Madeline seductively and closely in 1x14. But, for a man who admits that he views sex as a drug, and his FAVORITE AND GO-TO DRUG at that, he has been relatively chaste on-screen.

The show clearly has no problem showing couples hooking up so long as its “family-friendly”. They showed Ressler and Samar getting together. They’ve shown Liz and Tom having sexy times on several occasions. They insinuated sexual activity between Aram and his shitty girlfriend. …So, why have James Spader, who once played a character that said “Everything is sex,” be relatively celibate and not get in on the action???

If the show wanted to quell the whole “Lizzington” uproar, all the showrunners would have to do is have Red tell Liz he’s her dad or relative or father-figure or whatever, and then give him a nice, steady, likable love interest. Piece of cake.

Anyway, back to the Byronic hero.

While their backstories differ greatly, Red FEELS and SOUNDS a lot like Mr. Rochester, or other Byronic heroes in general. Like Dantes, he seems to have some kind of elaborate “long-game” of revenge that targets the people who did him wrong but who are also legitimately evil and are doing the world harm; while at the same time, he’s intent on protecting the lives of the innocent. Like Dantes, maybe Red has or soon will become too wrapped up in his mission of revenge and will need others to show him the light.

But, as for his similarities to Mr. Rochester, as I pointed out in the other post, Red has these long, grand monologues about what he has become, who he used to be, and who he wants (Liz to help him) to be again.

(EDIT: I previously had tried to embed videos before, but they didn’t come up on either mobile or desktop, so I’ve just added links to the YouTube videos instead.)

Examples include:

The Ugly Fish monologue in 2x09

The North Star monologue in 3x02

He also tends to wax philosophical about the guilt he feels, and how he is making or has tried to make amends, and how the life he leads has caused him to feel less-than-human, etc.

Examples include:

The “…just a nice gesture” monologue in 2x16

The “I’m a violent man” monologue in 3x12

And because of all this, he feels very much like a wandering, tortured soul… as we learn very vividly from the infamous “Parable of the Farmer” in 1x04.

All of these is, of course, very much like Mr. Rochester from “Jane Eyre.”

Here are some passages from “Jane Eyre” where Mr. Rochester is talking about the woman he loves. At the time, Jane is in love with him, but she believes he is in love with someone else (Blanche Ingram). In reality, though, Mr. Rochester has been in love with Jane since he first met her, and decided that jealousy would be the best way to 1) see whether Jane loved him, and 2) if she did, to make that love grow and become more apparent.

(BTW, just gonna put these two completely random pictures here:)

Here’s the first one, in which Rochester is talking to Jane after she saved him from a fire in his bedroom.

(BTW, the narration is written from Jane’s first-person perspective.)

[Rochester:] “But not without taking leave; not without a word or two of acknowledgment and good-will: not, in short, in that brief, dry fashion. Why, you have saved my life!—snatched me from a horrible and excruciating death! and you walk past me as if we were mutual strangers! At least shake hands.”

He held out his hand; I gave him mine: he took it first in one, them in both his own.

“You have saved my life: I have a pleasure in owing you so immense a debt. I cannot say more. Nothing else that has being would have been tolerable to me in the character of creditor for such an obligation: but you: it is different;—I feel your benefits no burden, Jane.”

He paused; gazed at me: words almost visible trembled on his lips,—but his voice was checked.

“Good-night again, sir. There is no debt, benefit, burden, obligation, in the case.”

“I knew,” he continued, “you would do me good in some way, at some time;—I saw it in your eyes when I first beheld you: their expression and smile did not”—(again he stopped)—“did not” (he proceeded hastily) “strike delight to my very inmost heart so for nothing. People talk of natural sympathies; I have heard of good genii: there are grains of truth in the wildest fable. My cherished preserver, goodnight!”

And, now, in this second passage … this is after Rochester has been (sort of) “courting” Blanche in front of Jane, and Jane and he are sharing a quiet, peaceful moment together after a very strange and stressful night.

Here, Rochester starts talking VERY VAGUELY about the shitty things that have happened to him, how he’s tried to find solace in worldy things and ultimately, only now, has he found happiness and peace with the woman he loves. Jane ~assumes~ he’s talking about Blanche, when in reality he’s talking about Jane:

“Well then, Jane, call to aid your fancy:—suppose you were no longer a girl well reared and disciplined, but a wild boy indulged from childhood upwards; imagine yourself in a remote foreign land; conceive that you there commit a capital error, no matter of what nature or from what motives, but one whose consequences must follow you through life and taint all your existence. Mind, I don’t say a crime; I am not speaking of shedding of blood or any other guilty act, which might make the perpetrator amenable to the law: my word is error. The results of what you have done become in time to you utterly insupportable; you take measures to obtain relief: unusual measures, but neither unlawful nor culpable. Still you are miserable; for hope has quitted you on the very confines of life: your sun at noon darkens in an eclipse, which you feel will not leave it till the time of setting. Bitter and base associations have become the sole food of your memory: you wander here and there, seeking rest in exile: happiness in pleasure—I mean in heartless, sensual pleasure—such as dulls intellect and blights feeling. Heart-weary and soul-withered, you come home after years of voluntary banishment: you make a new acquaintance—how or where no matter: you find in this stranger much of the good and bright qualities which you have sought for twenty years, and never before encountered; and they are all fresh, healthy, without soil and without taint. Such society revives, regenerates: you feel better days come back—higher wishes, purer feelings; you desire to recommence your life, and to spend what remains to you of days in a way more worthy of an immortal being. To attain this end, are you justified in overleaping an obstacle of custom—a mere conventional impediment which neither your conscience sanctifies nor your judgment approves?…

“Is the wandering and sinful, but now rest-seeking and repentant, man justified in daring the world’s opinion, in order to attach to him for ever this gentle, gracious, genial stranger, thereby securing his own peace of mind and regeneration of life?”

“Sir,” I answered, “a wanderer’s repose or a sinner’s reformation should never depend on a fellow-creature. Men and women die; philosophers falter in wisdom, and Christians in goodness: if any one you know has suffered and erred, let him look higher than his equals for strength to amend and solace to heal.”

“But the instrument—the instrument!  God, who does the work, ordains the instrument. I have myself—I tell it you without parable—been a worldly, dissipated, restless man; and I believe I have found the instrument for my cure in—”

He paused: the birds went on carolling, the leaves lightly rustling.  I almost wondered they did not check their songs and whispers to catch the suspended revelation; but they would have had to wait many minutes—so long was the silence protracted.  At last I looked up at the tardy speaker: he was looking eagerly at me.

“Little friend,” said he, in quite a changed tone—while his face changed too, losing all its softness and gravity, and becoming harsh and sarcastic—“you have noticed my tender penchant for Miss Ingram: don’t you think if I married her she would regenerate me with a vengeance?”

Now…

(SPOILER WARNING FOR JANE EYRE)

What Rochester is ACTUALLY talking about, in reference to what he experienced as a young man, was – about 20 years before the events of the novel – he traveled from England to the West Indies and was convinced by his family and others into marrying a woman whom he later discovered was clinically insane. He tried to live with her initially, but later brought her back to England and paid a servant to watch her and not tell anyone about it, never told any of his friends or other servants he was married, and then runs off and roams about the world for 20-ish years having trysts and trying to find solace where he could. And then – after he meets Jane – he tries to marry her without informing her that he’s already married.

So, after Jane finds out during the ceremony – through the providence of someone outing Rochester for his treachery – the two have a discussion about where their relationship will go from here. Rochester wants to “marry” her or at least have her live with him, away from people; but, she’s not down for it. This is what he says as part of his long-ass explanation as to why he did what he did:

“Then you are mistaken, and you know nothing about me, and nothing about the sort of love of which I am capable. … After a youth and manhood passed half in unutterable misery and half in dreary solitude, I have for the first time found what I can truly love—I have found you. You are my sympathy—my better self—my good angel. I am bound to you with a strong attachment. I think you good, gifted, lovely: a fervent, a solemn passion is conceived in my heart; it leans to you, draws you to my centre and spring of life, wraps my existence about you, and, kindling in pure, powerful flame, fuses you and me in one.”

Just in these four phrases I bolded from Rochester’s monologue to Jane about what he did, I saw parallels to four very notable Red quotes: (in order) when he tells Fitch “you cannot possibly fathom how deep that well of my truly goes” in reference to his desire to protect the things and people he loves in 1x20; the “I have you” in 1x03; his description of Liz to Sam in 1x08; and the “love is having no control” moment in 2x08.

(End of Spoiler Warning)

This is all a very long way of saying that I have no idea whether the writers intended for Red to have parallels to the Byronic hero or to Mr. Rochester specifically.

But, he does.

Red is clearly keeping secrets from Liz the way Rochester kept them from Jane. We’re not yet sure what these secrets are (many, including myself, believe it’s that he stole the identity of Raymond Reddington, who is Liz’s biological father).

And, despite a very large age gap, these two have been set-up as the romantic couple of our show, as Rochester and Jane were. Right now (in S5a), Liz believes Red to be her dad; and, in Jane Eyre, Rochester remarks to Jane how he’s old enough to be her father. (He’s like 40 and she’s around 18-20.)

And, just as with Rochester, Red is hoping to find some kind of re-humanization with Liz... that she will restore him to what he once was. People don’t say things like that to friends or family members, so it becomes very strong evidence that Red and Liz are meant to be our end-game.

Another quick thing I’d like to point out is that, in the novel, Jane has very few friends, and as of S5a, the only friends Liz has ever had on the show… consistently … are people from work. (And I guess you could count Tom.) She’s an orphan, like Jane. She doesn’t really have anyone to call “family” or “home.” (Other than Tom, but he’s dead now.) In S1 through S2a, we saw how alone and isolated and tricked and manipulated she felt, just as Jane does throughout various points in the novel.

Now, obviously, there are PLENTY of differences. This is a crime-drama procedural after all. Liz is a full-grown woman with a child of her own. She’s not an 18-20 year old governess who has never gone beyond her schoolhouse and childhood home. She’s not completely naive; she’s not completely without family and friends. When compared to Jane, she’s seen and done plenty.

But the fact that Red and Liz have these strong individual parallels to Rochester and Jane, respectively, and the fact that there are so many parallels between them as couples – ie, he’s keeping secrets from her; he’s besotted with her and sees her as his redemption, etc. – makes me wonder whether this WAS intentional to some degree.

Even while many TBL fans have been watching and screaming at the screen, “JUST SAY HE’S HER DAD ALREADY!” and then breathed a long sigh of exasperation and annoyance when the question was finally answered in 4x22... I’ve been sitting over here with these weirdly intertwined images stuck in my head:

[ouamotw]

Oh thank god. We were able to get a copy of the Agents of B.E.E.F. who are invading Reddington. Edi Blue Hill is the first file we obtained. What the heck could be redacted?!

[equalseleventhirds]

bcos i know that post is getting long what with all the edits n stuff, a short one:

Reddington: Continuity Errors, a ttrpg twitch stream, is currently looking for people for season two! Player applications also welcome, but we are particularly in need of GMs. GMing is a one-game commitment and you can bring any ttrpg system to the table (for the sake of our players, we do ask for games that are relatively easy to learn). The application deadline has been extended to May 1, 2023, 11:59 pm Pacific time. GM application here; player one here. (further summary/info on the show can be found on the website, or this post i made)

lmk if you have any questions, concerns, or need help with the application! as we're unable to pay, we appreciate anyone willing to volunteer, regardless of experience level, and are absolutely willing to provide assistance & be flexible for folks who may need help meeting some of the requirements.

[notesandcoffee]

Opinions post-S4

I didn't want to write this. (tw: incest... I guess?)

I would like to say something else, but that's essentially what everything boils down to right now. And I'm ashamed I didn't want to write it, which is partially why I've been avoiding it like the plague.

(The other reasons, in case you're wondering, include a new relationship, apartment hunting, moving, having a cough that's lasted weeks, and work being chaos in the "slow season" for assorted reasons.)

I was mostly ashamed because I don't feel a connection to this finale as I have with past episodes, mostly because the revelation that was placed delicately in front of all of us in the past few minutes. The blood test that revealed "Raymond Reddington" was Liz Keen's father, a plot and a revelation fans have been asking for since the first episode.

After which, Lizzington primarily split in to separate parts; those who believed the blood test and those who stuck with the imposter theory. According to rumors on twitter, people were deleting their Lizzington fanfiction out of squick for the possibly-incestuous relationship, or out of the shame of being associated with something possibly-incestuous. There was also a pushback by those who followed the imposter theory, saying the blood was 30+ years old, and that that Raymond Reddington wasn't the same as the Red played by Spader.

The split has been further emphasized by the promo team on social media. As our friends in the writers' room have noted, promo has nothing to do with them. The promo team has both promoted the Lizzington and Daddygate angles in an effort to confuse and intrigue the fanbase. They like the fact that Lizzington exists as it gives them yet another angle to market the R/L relationship. Promo has worked both angles at various points, depending on what's easier to market at the time and what will give them the best angle and make the show look more appealing overall.

Take this in direct contrast to the writers' room official and unofficial tweets, which seem to be far more responses to criticism and commentary, for better or worse. This includes Lizzington, and it's noted that several writers who have made pro-Lizzington statements have moved to non-Blacklist-related projects. Cerone even felt the need to let the twitter followers know that he did not intend for Kaplan's memory to be disjointed, as she wasn't affected by head trauma. "This is Kaplan's true past." tweeted Cerone, in reference to the idea that her memory might be slightly off. In the same series of tweets, he also owns up to several mistakes, one of which being Liz's scar.

However, assuming every viewer will read the small series of tweets of explanation he gave is absurd. Kaplan's memory was disjointed because she had a fucking gunshot wound to the head. I don't care what the author meant, because that's the only explanation that makes sense in the show.

Moving back to the Lizzington debacle, I don't really know what I believe, or what I want to believe at this point. What I would like to think is that, yes, the imposter theory is still in play, and that would make the blood test null and void. Liz wants Red to be close to her, which is why she's relieved at the blood test. The main problem I have with this idea is a lot of the fandom, and most of the population who watches the show at large, isn't watching the show that closely, if they still are at all. The length of time passed between when the blood was taken and now, or something to show this probably isn't the same guy, would have been useful to emphasize during the scene, if not needed. A popular interpretation (myself included) was to stop listening at the scene where Cooper told Liz Red was her father, according to the DNA. 

The relationship, as it stands, is one that's based in family but with the oddest notion of romance. To be honest, it brings the idea back of girls promised to their father in the same weird, psycho-sexual relationship, as they would be in a purity ball. 

The way that Red being the father is told didn't give enough room for most viewers to doubt whether or not the revelation is true, even if the perpetrators of the imposter theory have some ground. I'm halfway expecting, at this point, to be told that the imposter theory is a string of continuity errors and why haven't we been paying attention to the show as a fandom? After all, the theory that Kaplan had serious head injuries was fully supported by the amount of continuity errors in the text itself, but those were just continuity errors and she didn't have head trauma interfering in her memories, because why would she?

I've had fun so far seeing fan theories discussed on-screen thus far, but as of right now, I'm feeling like fan theories are being shot down for the simple argument of "because we can" by our friends in the writers' room. Cerone did this on twitter, and several writers have come out against theories fans have put forward, in support of "wait and see". I don't mind waiting for the next episode, but there has to be a motivation for me to do so. There doesn't seem to be any support of fan-works that have a different interpretation than the one marketing has chosen this week, and I don't know what that's supposed to mean. Are we supporting romance between blood relatives, or are all fathers intrinsically involved in their daughters' sex lives, you know, for Fathers' Day? Is this whole fandom based on a psycho-incestuous relationship?

Another issue is that either way this goes, viewers are going to be squicked out. Even if the imposter theory comes true, a not-small portion of the fandom believes Red and Liz are bonded by DNA, and views them as father and daughter. If not, there's all this ickiness that's been brought forward by the previous Lizzington mindset, including but not limited to a sexy dream sequence and several flabbergasted expressions between our characters. There is no right way out of this situation, and that's something that absolutely must be addressed plainly moving forward.

I don't think all hope is lost, of course, and we see a great example of this in the Saram - Janet relationship in our finale. Saram, of course, gets together, and Janet leaves in tears after betraying Aram for her own benefit. Twitter rumor states that fandom is taking Saram to be some sort of foreshadowing to Lizzington, with the parallels being too close to ignore. I don't believe so. Saram, as much as I love the relationship and the characters, is intended to be a commentary on Lizzington as well as a stand-alone story. The parallels are there, of course, but those in charge of the Saram relationship work closely with those in charge of the Lizzington relationship. It just so happens that that second category is also in charge of the main show, as Red and Liz are main characters. Saram is supporting.

As for me, well... I don't know what this means. Any of it. I've tried to write this as plainly as I can, as I always have, and I don't want to give a solid answer for whether or not Opinions will continue through S5. This story has a way of getting to me in a way that few stories do, but now that our main mystery has been "resolved" in the eyes of many viewers, I'm left clinging to characters instead of the relationship dynamics. 

H.A.G.S., my friends. 

[ouamotw]

Season 1 odds Continuity Errors may be ocer, but we will be live this Sunday at 5 pm EDT/2 pm PDT playing Trophy Dark for our Halloween special!

[ouamotw]

We were able to nab the last active Agent of B.E.E.F. file. Agent Cumulanimbus Doe...Nim Doe. This one is a doozy.

If Nim can be made an agent just by wanting a hamburger, none of us are safe.

[ouamotw]

We have obtained a second file from the Bureau of Extranormal Encounters and Fractaltions! Corporal Brett “The Butcher” Butcherson -- how does someone get that nickname!?

[ouamotw]

Cam! I adore Cam so much, and I love their accent! Cam is an incredibly talented voice actor, especially having seen them play Morgan as an anxious but wonderful bean, and Felicien’s confident dead self! Also they play musical instruments and can draw and do science... WHAT CAN’T YOU DO CAM? 

[ouamotw]

This Sunday, October 16th, at 6 PM ET / 3 PM PT

The Agents of B.E.E.F. will finally meet the one and only Wendy. 

Will things be answered? Will the Agents of B.E.E.F. find peace?

Will we be able to wrap up things like the Riverdale writers do?

Join us this Sunday for our Season 1 Finale of Reddington: Continuity Errors!