#relationship recognition

[taxinealkaloids]

harrianthe + sewing (variations on a theme)

[hiya-itsamber]

the reblog dillema on tumblr dot com is insane. why are we still having these conversations in the big year of 2024? just reblog the fic?? LEAVE A COMMENT? do the bare minimum?? its called etiquette babe! try it!! if you read a fic, reblog it, i promise it's not hard 🫶🏽.

you read dirty filthy disgusting smut? you liked the fic? okay hit reblog. nobody gives a shit, and if they do, block them!! it's liberating you should try it.

curate your tumblr experience it is NOT that deep, it will never be that deep. it's not embarassing to reblog fic, this is tumblr, be so ffr with yourself pls.

support the authors (and artists!!) who make you happy and they will continue to do so with no qualms i promise.

[satans-knitwear]

Actual OTP. Most iconic couple in the galaxy.

Gido x Gulu

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

community that has only seen themselves represented in a small handful of romance stories that aren’t explicitly about their real-world oppression, watching a new show or movie where they are represented in a romantic story that isn’t explicitly about their real-world oppression: getting a lot of “that other show with a queer romance that isn’t explicitly about real-world homophobia” vibes from this

[haleyincarnate]

Quote by Bianca Sparacino

[jaggedjot]

Underlining the question of 'whose decision was it to have The Kiss of Judas overlooking their marital bed?' with thick red marker.

[jasontoddenthusiastt]

The compelling thing about Jason as a character is that I never doubted that he cared about the world just because there weren’t panels of him being overly zealous about “restorative community care”

I’m not coming after anyone who wants to see that kind of stuff, but I do think seeking | that | as confirmation that Jason cares about the world is pretty narrow

[captmuldoon]

“You named a bee after me.”  “For you, Watson, I’d make adjustments. Always.”  “I'm so grateful that I fell into your orbit.”  “The thing that’s different about me, empirically speaking, is you.”  “I'm gonna miss this - not this, but...this. Working with you. I think what you do is amazing.”  “I think you have a lot to share if you cared to. I shouldn’t be the only one who knows you.”  “I will never allow harm to come to you - not ever. (’You can’t promise that.’) And yet I have.”  “I now value the work we do, first and foremost, because I do it with you.”  “We're two people who love each other.”  “If you go, I go.”  “I’m staying.”

[temperamentalaquarius]

Thinking about Bruce never forgiving Dick for being unable to save Alfred because he's always been able to do what Bruce could not. Thinking of how Bruce views Dick as both as an extension of his own hand and the only force that could stop him. Thinking of the way that Bruce takes on Dick's failures as his own as well as his successes, and vice versa. Thinking of Bruce loving Dick for all the ways that he is better than Bruce but hating him in a way that Bruce could only ever hate himself when Dick falls short . Thinking, thinking, thinking.

[edoro]

wrt the last post i just reblogged (Halsin cnc meta), i personally tend to imagine him as fairly aware of and comfortable with his kinks, including the ones based on his trauma

in fact i like to think that one of the reasons why he has such trouble accepting that his years of sex slavery were in fact deeply traumatic and abusive is because his response is to heavily sexualize his own trauma - not only was that part of how he discovered that he takes great pleasure in servicing others sexually, but ever since he's sought out situations where he can recreate aspects of the experience

because he's so large and strong and people tend to make assumptions about what kind of sex he wants or what kind of role he plays (or just project their own ideas of what kind of role they want him to play or think he should play onto him), he doesn't get to bottom or sub nearly as often as he likes

although his tendency towards acts of service is imo his own way of taking that control - even if someone wants him to be aggressive and fuck them, if he's doing it as an act of service, then he's still submitting himself to them and making himself their pet or toy and giving himself that satisfaction

this is something that i really like the idea of him and Astarion having in common, actually. i like to think of them both responding to their trauma by sexualizing it, but essentially in opposite directions

Astarion wants to be the one in control, the one doing rather than the one done to, and in contrast to Halsin, i think he would 100% think that makes him a bad person, basically as bad as Cazador

he doesn't really understand kink as something negotiated, as play between willing partners. his only experience is being tortured and exploited, and now that he finds himself with all of these desires to control, dominate, and hurt someone else, to force himself on someone else the way he was forced so many times, he's sure that it must mean he's irredeemably broken by his experiences

meanwhile, Halsin knows that both of their desires are normal and nothing to be ashamed of, but he's got this fun little cognitive dissonance going on where even though he would never think this of someone else, he feels like the fact that he found his experience of sex slavery powerfully erotic means it wasn't really that bad and that he can't really call himself a victim - maybe sort of a victim, but not entirely one, not the way someone like Astarion was

(even though their situations are very similar in certain respects. Astarion says most of his partners didn't even "grant me temporary bliss," but that doesn't mean he never found any of it sexually satisfying or erotically compelling, or never had any complicated feelings about Cazador that included love, a desire for attention/regard, or a sense of comforting familiarity)

i'm just very fond of the idea of Halsin being pretty comfortable in his own enjoyment of submission, including things like masochism, cnc, pet play, various types of power exchange, and just generally a lot of things that are quite specifically aspects of his own past abuse, and getting to walk Astarion through the idea that it's fine and okay to like that sort of thing whether you want to be on the giving or receiving end of it

and MEANWHILE being forced to confront his own internal double standard where he holds himself responsible for things that he would never hold someone else responsible for, due to his direct engagement with Astarion's trauma, and having to slowly come to the realization that he was a captive, he was a victim, it was abusive, and he is in fact Kind Of Fucked Up About It

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is wanting to scream at your friend to just dump their hateful racist asshole boyfriend, while at the same time knowing that they won't listen to you because they are in love and apparently, that erases their ability for critical thinking

While also not saying any of that because it would be rude

A "hateful racist asshole boyfriend" sounds ripe for a situation in which your friend could be dating someone actively grooming them for domestic abuse.

In those cases, individuals often already have poor boundary control, and it's not the critical thinking actually missing: it's the security that creating boundaries doesn't mean losing someone who they feel cares about them. Judgements on their ability to "think clearly" are both misplaced and encouraged by the abusers, as worsening self esteem leads to an abuse victim seeking comfort... often from the abuser.

I think it's very, very important to recognize that the best thing you can do for them is to be there, continually reaffirm that they can always tell you anything, and rather than pressure them to break up... ask them to tell you about the relationship. You can guide them to red flags, but also try to present possible communication elements. There are guides online by great resources talking about how to best support these conversations.

And, of course, it's always possible it is simply that your friend actually is racist and they put up with the behavior because of that. It's not hard for some bigots to find an in through less overt bigotry. But I strongly encourage folks to realize that "in love with no capacity for critical thought" is a very dangerous warning sign that someone may be unable to recognize healthy boundaries, and worse - to recognize unhealthy boundaries.

[tomatotales]

sapphic tashi/patrick/art

Patrick who has been in love with Art since she was twelve, and Art who has no idea.

But during the Junior US Open Art has a major sexuality crisis, and realizes Tashi Duncan is so fucking hot.

Patrick thinks Art is just following her lead and is absolutely clueless that she likes Tashi romantically. It isn’t until they are all in the hotel that Patrick realizes Art likes Tashi too. Art likes and girl, and it isn’t her.

So the rest of the story goes on as normal. Patrick is frustrated that she fell in love with Art, and even worse is than Art being straight, she just never liked Patrick.

And Art goes through her adult like realizing that her and Patrick’s friendship wasn’t necessarily platonic, but she didn’t understand it at the time. And it’s so much easier to understand that she loves Tashi, because who doesn’t, but to fundamentally understand she’s like girls, that she loves Patrick, that’s much harder.

And Tashi is like, “How did I get stuck with the two most useless lesbians ever?”

[haleyincarnate]

How malleable our hearts are when placed into the right hands.

And unfortunately, the wrong ones as well.

Inspired by @heavensghost

[kujakumai]

Atem and Ishizu really are funny as hell together and criminally underutilized. There's a reason they were besties in a past life. Every time I write them together they bounce off each other perfectly. She refuses to engage with his bullshit when utilized against her while simultaneously enabling it against everyone else, and is fully versed in her own more subtle version of bullshitting that bolsters Atem's credibility. They're both trying to sound confident about ancient magic they barely know how to use. They're both running "it was my job to protect all my loved ones (despite me being a literal child at the time) and therefore everything bad that happened to them is all my fault permanently forever" in their heads on loop. They're lying through their teeth and also the only people at this dig site who have any idea what they're doing. They're smooth operators. They're barely-holding-it-together disasters. They're gossiping about all their other friends. They are going to get banned from this Egyptology conference

[gay-jewish-bucky]

honestly i'm starting to care less and less what internet "activists" have to say about me, because i'm actually doing the work with the canadian government to press for meaninful change for palestinians and forging the foundations for lasting peace between israelis and their palestinian neighbours, while they're just yelling at jews on social media

[radio-4-is-static]

さよーならまたいつか！ | Kenshi Yonezu

誰かと恋に落ちて また砕けて やがて離れ離れ 口の中はたと血が滲んで 空に唾を吐く 瞬け羽を広げ 気儘に飛べ どこまでもゆけ 100年先も憶えてるかな 知らねえけれど さよーならまたいつか！

///

Fall in love, only to be crushеd once again And eventually, go our sеparate ways Blood seeps in my mouth without warning And I spit into the sky Spread your wings and soar Fly away to wherever your heart desires Would we remember in 100 years? Who cares? So long and see you again!