#sadly watching it does not scratch that itch ....

[oatmealswizard]

i need someone to sift through my back muscles like through freshly made rice noodles in the process of drying

[ryescapades]

I saw your post it's cute! Honestly. Is it cool if I request in Freader is Narumi Gen sweet little sister so every time he Soshiro is flirting with her he gets all brotherly protective of reader. Hehehe

genre/warning: fluff, attempt at crack, protective onii chan narumi kekeke

a/n: ok but like the way my brain is suddenly so full of ideas to write abt big bro!narumi ??? i could make a whole mini series of it wtf (if i'm invested enough ofc) /srs . btw thank you for the request !! this rly scratched an unknown itch inside my head <3 edited: now a mini series!!

there had been times when you'd find it entertaining to watch a documentary of animals brawling against each other, be it for territory, food, mates, family or even just sheer dominance.

the act of violence— no matter in what form— has been such a familiar concept to you since you were a mere child growing up with narumi gen, your older brother. there was a lot of underhanded competition going on with the other orphan kids so naturally the two of you had to do anything you could to survive.

not to mention you secretly dreamed of becoming a defense force officer, wanting to fight the monsters that had once destroyed everything you used to call home.

although now that you've successfully achieved said dream, you didn't think you'd have to witness actual violence among coworkers in the jakdf as well, and you are definitely not talking about sparring or training sessions whatsoever.

the real enemies are supposed to be the kaiju's, no? so why are you here, standing awkwardly behind your brother who is undoubtedly radiating such ferocity towards the man who just gave you a simple compliment a few seconds ago?

in fact, narumi is absolutely seething.

you tug at the back of your brother's shirt for the nth time, trying to hold him off from acting on his current emotion. "gen, stop! i told you it's nothing for you to be worried about." you groan, sending another apologetic look to hoshina but the third division's vice-captain only smiles softly at you, shaking his head.

narumi seems to glare even harder. "you bowl-cut freak! you just committed the biggest crime ever! eyes off her, you bastard!" he growls. unfazed, hoshina tilts his head to the side. "i only said that miss y/n here is lookin' good as always. care to explain what is so wrong about that, captain narumi?"

your cheeks flush slightly at his words but narumi loudly scoffs, "foxy eyed folks like you should kn—" your brother doesn't get to finish his words when the other man cuts him off, "i apologize, you two. but i've been here for too long, i'm afraid captain ashiro is searchin' all over for me. so if you'd kindly excuse me," hoshina hums, starting to walk away.

you catch his gaze as he steps past you, sending you a sweet smile and subtly reaching out his hand. returning one of yours, the two of you share a lingering touch of your fingers but sadly, it doesn't go unnoticed by narumi.

your brother gasps scandalously, "y/n get behind me! you're gonna get cooties from that thing!" he claims. your irritated huff of "what if i get cooties from you instead, gen?" is blatantly ignored as narumi snatches your hand before swiveling his head to face the vice-captain once more. "you did not just touch her, fox eyes!" he snarls.

hoshina doesn't even bother looking back as he casually waves. "i didn't. you should probably get yourself checked, captain. maybe your kaiju eyes have been chipping away at your vision."

narumi continues to throw colorful insults at hoshina's disappearing back, making you sigh exasperatedly. for some reason you're feeling a sense of deja vu; what does this remind you of, you wonder.

oh right, the animal documentaries.

©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !

[mj-iza-writer]

Part 2 for the recent story where Whumper gets Whumpee back through questionable methods. Requested by @valravnthefrenchie

Whumpee snuck out of their room and cautiously slank down the hall. They would be in big trouble if their nurse or guard caught them sneaking out of the room while they were still healing.

Every hallway they came to, they carefully peered around the corner.

"What are you doing?"

Whumpee nearly jumped out of their skin. They had been caught.

They turned slowly and looked up.

"Master, I... uhm, was looking for you", Whumpee smiled weakly.

"Funny I was also looking for you, but you were not where you were supposed to be", Whumper sighed, "so now tell me the truth. What are you doing?"

"My uhm puzzle Master. I was wondering if it was still out, or if someone put it away. I haven't seen it in a few months", Whumpee frowned, "I'm sorry, I'll go back to my bed."

Whumper nodded, "it's still where you left it. I asked them to leave it for you to work on when you came home."

"You really did plan on me returning then?", Whumpee looked at them strangely.

"Yes", Whumper nodded, "it was always planned that you would return home. I just didn't know when. They wouldn't have dared killed you, not with what they wanted me to do."

Whumpee nodded.

"Alright back to bed with you", Whumper started to usher them back down the hall.

"I can't see it?", Whumpee looked at them sadly.

"Nope, because I know you will start working on it", Whumper frowned, "let's get back before your nurse sees you stan... uh oh."

"What?", Whumpee turned and went pale.

"Why...are... they out of bed?", the nurse rushed toward them red in the face. "You are fighting a high temperature still with that infection, and you are out of your room", they glared at Whumper.

"Don't look at me like that", Whumper threw their hands up in surrender, "I told them the same thing and was trying to get them to go back."

Whumpee grinned, "my great Master... afraid of a nurse?"

"Don't mess with nurses Whumpee", Whumper smiled back, "now go on, your puzzle has waited this long. It will survive a few more days."

Whumpee looked back at their nurse, "I'm sorry, I'm coming right now."

"You bet you are. You shouldn't even be up right now. You were napping when I left your room a few minutes ago", the nurse followed Whumpee down the hall, continuing to lecture them.

Whumper watched them until they were out of sight. They chuckled as they turned to go back to their office.

Whumpee winced as their nurse unbandaged their back.

"The doctor is going to come and check this for you. I'm going to clean it right now", their nurse sat on the edge of the bed.

"Does it look any better?", Whumpee moaned as their nurse gently ran a cloth along their back. It itched so much and they were not allowed to touch anything.

"That feels so good", Whumpee slowly blinked contently.

"It's not as bright red as it was, but it's still badly infected", the nurse sighed, "this is one of the worst cases I've seen of an infected wound. It would have been nice that you had gotten first aid from that Tyler, but even then this wouldn't have been helped. You've been fighting this for a very long time. No wonder you were so tired and weak."

Whumpee nodded, "please can you just scratch it a little for me... please?"

"I unfortunately can't. It would do it worse to scratch. It will become more itchy and cause you to want to scratch more. You could also hurt it more", the nurse frowned, "it's best not to scratch."

"It's torture, I'm tired of laying on my stomach also", Whumpee frowned.

"I know dear, and I'm sorry. I know it is hard for you to sit still, but we have to do what's best", the nurse rubbed their head gently, "soon though you will be able to get up and do things again. Just not right now."

Whumpee sadly nodded.

Whumper followed the doctor into the room and sat down by the window. They just wanted to hear what the doctors' thoughts were on the infection and why it was lasting so long. They had been growing more and more concerned over their dear pet's health.

"How does it look doc?", Whumper tried to break the silence of the room.

"Still infected, but we have some control over it now. It's not spreading anymore and is receding slowly", the doctor lifted Whumpee's shirt a little more, "overall I am pleased with how this is healing."

"Is it normal that it's taking so long though?", Whumper frowned.

"It can be normal. They have had this for a fairly long time. We are giving it what it needs and the body is dealing with it properly as well", the doctor frowned, "Whumpee's body went through a lot during the last few months. This isn't the only thing their body is healing. Their body is using a lot of its resources to heal and recuperate. That's why it is important to rest, continue on the diet that I set for you, and take the medicine. Everything is important to making sure your body has what it needs to heal."

Whumpee sighed, "so I still have to be in this bed?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so", the doctor laid their shirt down again, "I know you've been getting restless, but we can't push your body. You don't have the energy to spare for it."

Whumpee sighed sadly, "I'm so bored, and I'm so tired of laying here."

"I'm sorry Whumpee, unfortunately if we don't do what your body needs you will be sick for a long time", the doctor patted Whumpee's shoulder, "all other vitals seem to be doing great. Is there anything else that needs to be checked?"

"No", Whumpee whispered, "unless you can scratch my back for me... it's so itchy."

"I can not do that unfortunately, but I'll see if there is an ointment we can apply to relieve some of that."

"I would love that", Whumpee nodded.

"Whumper can I speak to you outside of the room", the doctor frowned.

Whumper stepped out into the hall with the doctor.

"You know I can only heal them physically right?", the doctor crossed their arms in frustration.

"Yes", Whumper frowned, "what do you mean?"

"They are depressed... I can imagine them having some PTSD from what they just went through as well. I can only heal them physically, but if their brain and heart remain unhealed they will get sick and in a way that I can't help with."

"So what should I do for them", Whumper frowned, "I want my dear one back. I'd do anything."

"Well I advise finding some form of therapy that can help them through this, and finding a way to entertain them."

Whumper nodded, "okay that sounds manageable."

Manageable now meant some poor soul was now tied up in the backseat of one Whumper's people and on the way to Whumper's compound.

"Where am I being taken?", the person questioned.

"You'll see", Whumper's employee answered.

"I'd rather not", they sighed.

Whumper looked up as their employees guided a person into their office.

"Is that the therapist?", Whumper grinned.

"Yes", they chuckled as they sat the person down, "they are a highly rated psychologist from what sources show. Perfect for what you need them for."

"Would someone tell me what the heck is going on", the person looked around, "where am I, and who are you?"

"My name is Whumper... you're currently sitting in my office in my compound", Whumper leaned back in their chair.

"Wh-Whumper? As in...?", they made a petrified face.

"The very one... I'm afraid I need your services", Whumper smiled.

"My, uh... my services?"

"Yes... you are about to meet someone very dear to my heart. They just came back from a kidnapping that lasted for a good several months. Their doctor says they are in good health, but is concerned with their mental health and heart health. The doctor recommended a therapist to help Whumpee. They seem depressed and has some PTSD as I understand it. I only want the best for them."

"So yo-you need me to help them... I can... yeah I can help. Mostly cause of the things I heard about you", they frowned, "how long.... how long do you think you'll need me for?", they pulled out their phone, "I'll ask staff to reschedule patients for me."

"Oh no worries... you'll live here now. Just like the doctor and nurses, that way I have easy access to you. Your payment will be all of your needs being met, and plus your life will be spared", Whumper snapped their fingers.

One of the employees took Caretaker's phone and threw it to Whumper.

"Live here.... now?", they frowned, "but."

"You unfortunately do not get a say... end of discussion", Whumper frowned as they set phone on the desk.

"My family?", the person frowned.

"Sources show you don't have one", someone spoke from behind.

They sighed.

"Hmm", Whumper chuckled, "what is your name?"

"Caretaker", they frowned, "I really have nothing to say that will change your mind?"

"Nope", Whumper stood, "shall we meet some of your new friends, then Whumpee... and we will get you settled in."

Caretaker gulped, but nodded.

They stopped by Whumpee's room, but their nurse quickly kicked them out as Whumpee had just fallen asleep.

"Sorry you'll be able to meet them later, this here is your room", Whumper opened one of the doors in the hall, "you'll find it comfortable."

"Are those my things?", Caretaker stared at boxes and suitcases.

"Yes. Oh good I didn't know they did that already", Whumper grinned.

"The compound has a lot of things to see. If you look up you'll see guards everywhere. They see you as well, you will not get far if you try to escape."

Caretaker almost cried after the face the doctor made when they were introduced.

"I'll leave you to it then. I'll come back when Whumpee wakes up", Whumper turned to leave.

The doctor followed them out.

"You said you weren't kidnapping anymore", the doctor whispered angrily at Whumper in the hall.

"You said yourself that I needed to have a psychologist see Whumpee. I can't take Whumpee to appointments, not with my lifestyle. You have been here long enough to know better. Whumpee is important to me, and if you felt this was someone that we needed to have here, then it needed to be done. If there's a problem, I can call a guard in here to straighten it out for you."

"No, that's not necessary", the doctor spoke through gritted teeth.

"Perfect. Show them around and tell them about this place", Whumper smiled, "you know I'm not as bad as I could be."

"Just because it could be worse.... doesn't mean it's okay", the doctor turned to go inside.

Whumper chuckled as they walked away.

Inside the room, the doctor turned to a few nurses and Caretaker.

"You can blame me for you getting kidnapped. They have another hostage named Whumpee, who has severe Stockholm syndrome, PTSD, and depression. They just got back from being kidnapped for several months. I want Whumpee to get better, and I forgot who I was talking to", the doctor frowned, "I am so sorry."

"What am I supposed to do then?", Caretaker frowned.

"Play along... do not trust anyone outside of this room.... not even Whumpee. They are so badly conditioned. Just do the job needed, and do not get into trouble. Whumper will dispose of those they do not need. If you value your life, don't step out of line."

"How do we get out of here?", Caretaker frowned, "how do you escape?"

"We don't", a nurse stepped forward and sadly replied, "right now the goal is to survive and pray."

Caretaker looked at the doctor sadly and nodded.

The doctor didn't trust Caretaker enough yet to tell them there may be a plan soon, but it was in the early stages. Honestly, only a guard and the doctor knew of the plan.... those were the only ones who needed to know right now.

Caretaker was taken to Whumpee's room by a guard.

Whumper sat next to the bed talking with Whumpee when Caretaker was brought in.

"Well hello Caretaker", Whumper smiled, "meet your new favorite patient."

Whumpee turned to look.

Caretaker almost gasped when they saw Whumpee and their back.

"It's okay, you can come closer", Whumper frowned, "we won't bite."

"Sorry I was... surprised by their back", Caretaker tried to fake a smile.

Whumpee looked down sadly.

"Yes, the doctor is working on it. We both hope it will heal soon", Whumper nodded as they patted Whumpee's head.

"I'll leave you to it", Whumper stood, "the guard will sit in and make sure you don't pull any funny business. I'm trusting someone very special into your care, so please take care of them."

Caretaker nodded and watched Whumper leave.

Whumpee shyly watched them sit down.

"Are you here to help my back heal faster?", Whumpee whispered.

"No, not for that", Caretaker said with late frustration in their voice, "I guess you have been displaying signs of depression and things like that. So what's going on? Your a...your Master is concerned."

Whumpee looked down sadly, having heard the frustration, "I'm sad and bored", Whumpee sighed, "ever since I was brought home, I've been trapped in bed."

"I see", Caretaker nodded.

"I miss my puzzle.... I was kidnapped and forced to be tied up for several months. Blindfolded and noise canceling headphones. A lot of things happened to me while there, some of which I don't feel comfortable talking about. I looked forward to coming home and being free to be able to do what I wanted, but I still feel trapped", Whumpee sighed, "but doctor says I have to rest, so I have a nurse or a guard in here all of the time, but they won't talk to me all of the time, and Master is busy. I just want...", Whumpee stopped talking.

Caretaker wanted to hate this person so bad.... this was why they were here, but they seemed so sweet. Caretaker's heart melted.

"You just want to be loved right?", Caretaker smiled.

Whumpee smiled weakly and nodded.

Whumper came back after a while and pulled Caretaker out into the hall.

"What are you thinking? What can be done?", Whumper actually seemed to be concerned.

"They seem to feel lonely. Those that are in there watching them are not interacting with them enough. They want interaction and love", Caretaker frowned, "I can help with that if you'd like. I'll stay with them throughout the day so they can get the interaction. The nurse and guard can do what they need to do with them. I can entertain them."

"That sounds good, but you will be under watch to make sure you aren't doing anything against the contract. You'll get a bullet between the eyes if you are found guilty", Whumper pointed gun fingers at Caretaker, "am I clear?"

"Crystal clear", Caretaker nodded, "can I be dismissed so that I can prepare some things and also talk to their doctor on care plans."

"Yes you may", Whumper nodded.

Caretaker went back into the med room where the doctor was working.

The doctor and nurses turned and looked at them.

"We need to get them out of here", Caretaker whispered, "we need to get out of here as well."

"We know", the doctor nodded, "they melted your heart didn't they?"

Caretaker nodded quickly.

"Same as us", the doctor nodded, "welcome to the team."

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all.

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

@sacredwrath @porschethemermaid

@monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz

@bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13

@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

@whumpbump @everythingsscary

@skittles-the-whumpee @expressionless-fr

@theforeverdyingperson @legendarydelusiongoatee

@candleshopmenace @whumpanthems

@lavndvrr @ivymyers

@starfields08000 @a-living-canvas

@lumpofsand @watermeezer

@indigoviolet311 @whumpy-mountains

@3-2-whump @risk606

@electrons2006 @paperprinxe

@whumprince @kaz-of-crows

@mis-graves @decaffeinatedtimetraveler94

@sausages-things @clevah-girlboss

@isikedmyself878 @daffyduckcommittedtaxfraud

@valravnthefrenchie

[philologique]

10 patpran fic recs (and one inkpa rec)

showing up a doozy of a month later with the fic recs i promised i would deliver “shortly​.” sorry!!

hopefully you follow me and will see these (in which case, message me off anon and I WILL send enthusiastic fic & fanvid recs, possibly less belatedly and probably even when you don’t ask for them lmao). if not, whoever is reading this, i hope you find a fic—or two, or ten—that sparks joy ✨

these basically all require knowledge of bad buddy canon. if you ever want no-context-required fic recs for other fandoms, or bbs recs to scratch a more specific itch, my askbox is open! send me some tropes or vibes you really like/any hard passes and i’ll try to find something for you!!

fic recs under the cut!

OBJECTS IN THE REARVIEW MIRROR MAY APPEAR CLOSER THAN THEY ARE by teaseller (canon divergence, rated t, 3450 words)

“Do you want something to drink? Water? Juice? Tea?” Pran is flitting awkwardly between the kitchen and the living space, seemingly looking for something to do with his hands, or fill the space. Pat attempts to ask for water but instead goes with “I missed you when you were gone.” What will be different, this time?

achingly beautiful and one of THE character-defining pat fics for me. an au where pran was still sent to boarding school after their high school concert, but they ultimately went to different universities. if you watched episode 12 and couldn’t get the thought of pat smiling sadly at their dumpling place and saying “I haven't been home in a long time” out of your head, this fic is for you.

We Can Follow the Sparks by crookedfelicities (bet-era, rated t, 8.8k)

Or, 5 times Pat nearly loses the bet +1 time Pran does.

speaking of Character-Defining Pat Fics, every three sentences of this fic there was a passage that either took my breath away it was so perceptive or made me smile hard enough that my face hurt. the DIALOGUE!! the CHEMISTRY!!! the way crookedfelicities captures pat & pran in that in-between space they built with the bet—their incredible fondness for each other, pat's certainty that this is it for him, his joy in knowing he'll gladly jump into this headfirst as soon as pran is ready! and the +1—the way pran's want is this palpable, heavy thing; the contrast between the weight of his longing and the quick, sharp banter between them. perfection.

Pause by filigreesails (bet-era, rated t, 4,588 words)

On New Year's Eve, Pran is stuck at home with nothing but a sprained ankle and a foul mood to keep him company. Even Pat seems to be ignoring his texts, even though the bet has been dispelling the remaining distance between them at an almost alarming rate, of late. But a companion for the evening may be closer to hand than he expects...

my face hurt from smiling I'm so FOND of them and the whole dynamic they captured of that nebulous, undefined era of pat and pran's relationship. the combination of pran's hesitance and his absolute certainty in the way they feel about each other, the way they each make themselves so vulnerable by putting the competition on pause... it’s wonderful :’)

sidenote: @chamacafeahorrible​​ my ao3 bookmark from april 2022 says ‘rec annie as soon as she watches bad buddy’ so if u ever do watch bad buddy this is specifically for you, along with @miscellar’s zombie fic which. holy shit.

nothing to lose by dekkaisdefyinggravity/@paalove​ (canon divergence, rated g, 1420 words)

Things went a bit further between Pat and Pran before they were found out - now their friends have to deal with it.

this made my heart hurt and then it made me smile like a fool. ao3 user dekkaisdefyinggravity has this unparalleled ability to build a whole, lived-in world in such a short space, and this is no exception; the contours of this au are fleshed out so deftly i’m in awe. i first read this during a break at work and spent the rest of the day thinking idly about this version of pat and pran, so wholly shaped by the circumstances of the au and so immediately recognizable as themselves. I reread it this summer and it still takes my breath away. I could easily read a hundred thousand more words of this universe and not get bored.

Fight Or Flight (Worth The Wait) by Jabber_Moose (canon divergence, rated t, 12k)

Pat still wants to shove him back under, hide him, and pretend none of this is happening. He wants to preserve the bubble of camaraderie they’ve been in as long as possible, because he’s not sure if he’ll get another chance.

Or: canon divergence where Pran is discovered under Pat's bed in ep 2, the trajectory of a story shifts, and Pat bulldozes through in true Pat fashion: determined, full throttle, and not how a friend would do or say anything.

a canon divergence fic that’s so well done it feels obvious in hindsight, even though i hadn’t given it any thought—of *course* the scene with ming in episode 2 was a fork in the road!! i love the choices Jabber_Moose makes here, the places the story veers off from the one we know and the moments where it unexpectedly falls back on track. and pat. PAT!! it’s an exquisitely frustrating delight to follow him as he reacts to one shitty situation after another, guided entirely by emotions he hasn’t come to name yet. reader, i love him.

Breathe by concerningcardigancollection (canon divergence/food allergy au, rated t, 9.6k)

Pat doesn't eat peanuts. This is why.

the fic where instead of a bet pran nearly dies of an allergic reaction and they get their shit together early. I think about this fic all the time. it simply slaps. i LOVE when two characters who secretly Know Things about each other have to reckon with that publicly, and this fic has that in spades. what a good fic!! 

another sidenote: @oswlld​​ sometimes i think of bbs as an inadvertent spiritual successor to that episode of lizzie mcguire where she and kate get paired together for a class project, and this fic reminded me why!

heart in a cage by @sunshinedobi (canon-adjacent wlw au, rated e, 36k)

In another universe, Pran loves Pat. That’s not the universe Pat is stuck with, but that’s ok. She’s getting over it.

OH BOY. WLW PATPRAN. sometimes a fic can feel so personal it’s hard to talk about? I just-- okay. the thing about my relationship to pran is that sometimes it's important to have a blorbo who’s a dude you can project feelings about daughterhood onto from a safe distance. this fic completely eliminated that distance and peeled me like an orange. just. a wonderful fic that rubbed me absolutely raw.

Stuff and Things by aworkingprinter (pre-canon/canon-compliant, rated t, 8.3k)

Pat was careless with his things. New pencil cases, new backpacks, new notebooks. Meanwhile, Pran kept his backpack from the beginning of elementary school until lower secondary, and he had decorated it himself. The important thing, he had decided when he was twelve, was that Pat was spoiled and careless, and he, Pran, was not. It was a basic Pat/Pran divide, as sure as the pink line between their garbage cans and Pat’s interest in drums (and girls.) About the belongings Pat and Pran have kept, abandoned and shared across the years.

i struggled to decide which aworkingprinter fic to rec because they all made my mind whirr in *such* good and different ways. read this when you’re in the mood for meditations on a theme, a series of quiet vignettes set over time and full of perceptive lines that knocked me out at the knees (there are two passages i still think about at least weekly). then, run-don’t-walk to Pinocchio (an au in which pran cannot lie and remains full of secrets, 46k—@raftings​ i think you will LOVE this) and to everything else aworkingprinter has written.

Can't Get Off This Ride by fangurks (canon divergence - soulmate au, rated t, 15k)

"So you think she'll transfer you again?""Yes, Pat! Give me one reason in the world that would not make her send me away!" At that, Pat's expression turned thoughtful, and Pran used the descending silence to wipe at his face and pick up the towel that he had previously dropped. His anger was slowly replaced with exhaustion, as he held out the piece of fabric. "We can't change things anymore anyway. We always knew how us being friends would en-" "What if we were soulmates?"

pretend!soulmate au!! PRETEND! SOULMATE AU!!! pat & pran have so many shared memories that they’ve experienced differently, and shared experiences that they remember differently, and fangurks takes that and runs with it like a gymnastics ribbon. and the way they weave in specific emotional beats from canon?? it’s so good. like...damn, pat. you really do have to stop doing this to him. also i think about the way this fic articulates their families’ respective attitudes towards The Feud all the time. a seminal work in bad buddy scholarship. 

the heart haunts what it haunts by AndSoTheUniverseEnded (canon divergence - ghost au, rated t, 26k at 5 chapters) (WIP as of 2023/07/16)

"Obviously! What else would a ghost do?" "A what?" Maybe Pran hadn't lost his mind. Maybe the rest of the world had just decided to go crazy when he wasn't looking and no one had bothered to update him on the situation. That would be just typical. "What did you think was happening?" Pat asked, incredulously. Pran threw up his hands. "I don't know, Pat! But my first thought, weirdly enough, wasn't that you're haunting me!"

the just like heaven-esque ghost fic of my dreams. i am quite possibly the world’s biggest sucker for a somewhat-light, plotty ghost romance, and this fic DELIVERS. we all know the story: pran transfers back home during his first year at university and finds himself unexpectedly and fortuitously reunited with pat. less fortuitously but even more unexpectedly, the pat who this pran encounters is a ghost. this fic is so good. also not to spoil too much but i love the OCs here?? an elderly queer woman who can talk to ghosts and her dead-but-not-departed wife?? ahhhhh!!!!

heads up this fic was last updated in february 2022— i'm holding onto hope that maybe one day it will be continued, but if not the ride was still absolutely worth it.

yet another sidenote: @icouldhyperfixatehim​ i think this is possibly as specifically up your alley as it is mine?? if you read it lmk how you liked it!!

+1 inkpa rec

not patpran, but it’s summer in the northern hemisphere and this fic feels like taking a sip of lemonade on a hot day

nothing else would ever be better (better) by dekkaisdefyinggravity (post-canon, rated g, 1.5k)

That’s when Paa has the thought: Marry me. The one where our girls get engaged.

this fic left a good taste in my mouth! in classic dekkaisdefyinggravity style, this fic feels so alive and comfortably lived in—I love when side characters have lives that don't revolve around the main characters—and every few paragraphs there was a moment that was just so wonderfully refreshing. i'm also unreasonably invested in the offscreen drama that’s alluded to in passing here. that broken engagement... tell me more 👀

[admirableadmiranda]

No worries if you feel like not answering and reccing, but do you have any all time fave recs for MDZS? I would love (and trust you) to hear more about them 💜

Hi Anon! You're so sweet, I just had to give you some answers!

Because I am a fickle person about faves, this is by no means an exhaustive list, but here are some of the ones that I return to over and over again. Some of these will have either characters or relationships that people may not care for so much, but you asked for my favorites so I will still share openly.

Falling to the Rhythm by Selenay just makes me really happy, it's a Strictly Come Dancing au where Wangxian are paired together and fall in love over the course of the shows. Features some light Yunmeng siblings and JC being a grumpy brother, but I rarely find that annoying in modern aus where he's not in the same positions he is in canon and the dances and ways they fall in love make me so happy. Also perhaps an unfairly tagged oblivious WWX, he's no worse than genuine canon CQL WWX who doesn't have reasons to make connections sooner than he does.

Preparing the Soil by Rynne is one of my all time favorites, where Lan Wangji creates a space for his husband in the Cloud Recesses and the effects of the Lan Qiren forbidding the juniors from talking to Wei Wuxian rule are dealt with. Lovely and warm and full of how much Lan Wangji loves Wei Wuxian and how much Lan Wangji himself is loved, it makes me smile and is one of my comfort reads.

Sunny Horizons by Justdoityoufucker (now orphaned) A really sweet fic that a former friend wrote for me containing happy Wangxian and a hearing disabled Wei Wuxian. While sadly our friendship seems to be over for good, this fic still makes me really happy and reminds me of the good times.

Wei Wuxian's Birthday Oneshots by origami79 is one of my favorites for just being a very cute collection of somewhat interwoven fics and a couple of art pieces all about celebrating Wei Wuxian! While the author hasn't returned to it yet, it's a reread for whenever I want a reminder that Wei Wuxian is also really loved.

Catching Your Reflection Passing By by Suspicious Popsicle is a very sweet story about soulmates in a very different way from how I've seen it any other time! Containing a Lan Wangji who has grown up seeing Wei Wuxian in shared reflections and a Wei Wuxian who can sometimes open doors and see Lan Wangji in doorways, it was really sweet and warm. Contains the same Yunmeng siblings/modern au disclaimer as Falling to the Rhythm.

The This River Runs To You series by sundiscus. My first Dragonji and also a case fic/modern cultivation that scratches the right itches. A smart Wei Wuxian and happy ending. Same Yunmeng siblings/modern au disclaimer.

glitteringmoonlight in general. She has a lovely array of works for all moods and all of them celebrate my favorite characters very well.

A Feast for the Eyes by Lareine. This one is just fun; both Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji run youtube cooking channels and A-Qing absolutely geeks out over getting to watch the two of them together. Only has two chapters, but what two we get are just a lot of fun and I really enjoy the free silliness of the story.

Grandmaster of Cultivation: Walkthrough and Guide by athylia

A very fun take on a fic where it's a guide to getting (or not) the secret route for the video game bachelor Lan Wangji in Modaozushi the video game!

notes on a scene by wishingswell. Another dance au where Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian are ballet dancers. Soft modern au, but the focus is really on Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji.

Both parts of constellations by northofallmusic. A story set during the Sunshot Campaign where Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji have to hide in a cursed tomb from Wen soldiers and it changes things just a little bit.

fish & wild geese by impossibletruths. Modern farm au where Lan Wangji returns from the big city to his childhood home and works through the grief of losing his mother and reconnecting with Wei Wuxian who lives on his grandmother's farm.

the place where you are by BlackWiresOnHerHead. A space travel au where Lan Wangji is a scientist on a mission to catalogue data of a supernova and Wei Wuxian is the mechanic of the ship that will take them through this solar system before it explodes. Has one chapter with a higher concentration of Jiang Cheng than I'd like, but otherwise I find the fic really enjoyable and the very sciency space ship traveling feeling something not easily done nor replicated.

Unavoidable by diamondbruise. Lan Wangji does not know who this Wei Wuxian is, but Wei Wuxian is in the Cloud Recesses to break a curse on his beloved. Lan Wangji can't shake the feeling that something is wrong about the whole situation. A curse fic that doesn't make me cringe or wince at the Wangxian and has the really adorable part where if Lan Wangji forgot he loved Wei Wuxian the first time, he'd just fall again.

Themes and Variations in F# Major by defractum (nyargles) this time it's a Wangxian are musicians au! Lan Wangji is a professional violin and pianist, Wei Wuxian a flute prodigy. While they traveled in similar circles since they were young, this is the story of when they finally connect. Contains some Jiang stuff I usually ignore as I'm not in it for the Jiangs, I'm in it for the Wangxian.

make this chaos count by devotedbones. Wei Wuxian gets to clock a guy in the jaw with his flute. Also contains one of my all time favorite lines "They had one foot in childhood and the other in the grave" describing the young men who went into the Sunshot Campaign. Fully CQL characterization.

CSI: Gusu Edition by Stratisfyre. I'm a sucker for fics where cultivation is blended with other more real world stuff and Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian being basically forensic scientists with cultivation is a really lovely blend. Contains some good uncle Lan Qiren and more CQL level characterization, but I still enjoy it more than a year later.

Future Cultivation AU by Aki_No_Hikari. A modern cultivators in college au in a world where Mo Xuanyu did not sacrifice himself to revive Wei Wuxian, but Wangxian's reincarnations met again in the future anyway. I love all the world building and thought put into it. The fifth installment is a particular favorite.

vinegar jug by dandelion-san. Future Lan Wangji arrives in Cloud Recesses Lectures and decides to entertain himself while waiting to go home by indulging all of little Wei Wuxian's whims easily. Little Lan Wangji tries and fails to not completely die of jealousy. Hilarious and the right tone for the situation.

Four Parts Honey and One Part Vinegar by masked. The juniors try to determine why Wei Wuxian never gets jealous when people are fawning over or trying to seduce his husband. In the end, the answer is very simple.

花无百日红; the flower that withers by yiqie. Sort of a time travel fic and sort of not. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji encounter an invention that sends them tumbling back through their memories, unable to change anything but revisiting their pasts through fresh eyes, forgiving themselves for the things they did to survive.

and so my heart beats wildly by lily_winterwood. Modern cultivation au where cultivation is now an olympic sport! A bit more heavy on the misunderstanding level than I usually like, but they're teenagers for most of it so it fits more here, and they solve it pretty quickly once they get the hang of actually talking instead of walking on each other's hearts by mistake. Also contains yunmeng bros and kind of sad JC, but in a way that I really don't find that annoying.

shadows in the sun rise by Yuu_chi. Another Lan Wangji is cursed fic, but this one is absolutely about the highlights of how well Wangxian understand each other. As Lan Wangji's senses are locked to him, they are able to continue communicating almost the whole way through until the curse is broken, a very lovely difference from the way a lot of these curse fics go.

grow by Cafecliche. Wei Wuxian is temporarily cursed to be a small child. The juniors take good care of him.

moonlight caught in mutton fat by Raitalzen. This time it's a Twin Jades get cursed fic and Wei Wuxian and Lan Qiren team up to break the curse before it kills them for good. Seems to be following entirely CQL characterization so normal feelings about good uncle LQR are rendered irrelevant and also contains one of my favorite violently murderous Wei Wuxian because someone tried to kill his husband tropes.

The Guests of Cloud Recesses by cafecliche. There's a ghost in the Cloud Recesses and Wei Wuxian is uniquely qualified to deal with its problems.

Turnabout by miixz. A new favorite that I accidentally missed cause I started on page 2 of my bookmarks. Lan Wangji unexpectedly travels back in time and through his knowledge of what will come, changes the world for the better.

Tread Lightly on my Ground by AshayaT'Reldai. A rarepair fic of Lan Xichen and Qin Su! Before she can marry Jin Guangyao, Qin Su is assaulted by Jin Guangshan and runs off to Gusu in hopes that Lan Xichen will protect her and her unborn child from the Jin. Warnings should be taken into account.

I hope some of these wet your whistle, these are the fics I like to reread when I want something familiar.

[austerlitzborodinoleipzig]

Favorite 2023/2024 Programs Pairs SP

Pairs event at Worlds was so fucking good even without the Russians. (You'll only see me saying this for pairs. This is the only discipline where Russians were legitimately above the rest). But this season did prove that the field can actually manage without them.

Have to say tho that most the programs aren't really good and we're desperately in need of some good Choreo which is too rare at this point (Cheng Peng save me!).

So here's list if my favourite programs from this season. Rankings are to be taken with a grain of salt.

Honorable mentions go to

Ghilardi/Ambrosini (The Ecstasy of Gold). Choreo did not left an imprint but I love the music choice the costumes and the general vibe. G/A had some great packaging this season.

Ariano Kent/Laliberté Laurent (500 miles). You just can't keep the Canadians away from Sadboi music and this baby pairs came out with the weepy ballad variant of 500 miles. It's an experience for sure.

7th - Yuna Nagaoka/Sumitada Moriguchi - Can’t Take My Eyes of You, by John Lloyd Young, choreo by Cathy Reed

Fun. Charming. Nice to watch. Nothing special but this is one of those feel good programs. The fact that YunaSumi for their first season together have better packaging than RikuRyu is nothing short of tragic.

6th - Anastasia Golubeva/Hektor Giotopoulos-Moore - Architect of the Mind, by Kerry Muzzey, choreo by Jonathan Guerreiro

Recycled from last year. I love the baby Australians so much and this routine show why. Ability to follow the relentless pace of the music. A sense of drama. Good unisson and well matched lines. I especially love the step sequence where their bodies unfurl to the swirls of the music a bit like an accordion. It scratches an itch. Love Nastya's lines and love Hektor's commitment to the performance.

5th - Minerva Fabienne Hase/Nikita Volodin - Stay, by Rihanna, choreo by Paul Bolle and Mark Pillay

Not the most original thing and Virtue/Moir did it better. But Hase/Volodin are not Tessa and Scott, nor do they need to be. It could be a bit bland and tbh if the team were only slightly less talented it would be.

But instead we have a nice, light, romantic program. It goes perfectly well with Minerva's softness. Volodin is very solid but non existent as a performer and that's ok ! They only have to move prettily to the music and it works for them.

4th - Ellie Kam/Danny O’Shea - East of Eden, choreo by Drew Meekins

What good skating skills does to a motherfucker !!!

Even with the tech shortcomings (that throw jump is not even close to ready), when I saw them live in Angers this seasons they blew everyone put of the water with this SP. Skating skills are so rare among pairs skaters and it's so good to see them being rewarded by the judges for it. The sheer ice coverage the breath the ease of their skating is wonderful to see live. And East of Eden, overused as it is, is a perfect match for their brand. The music is suitably intense. Definitely one of the highlights of the season.

3rd - Cheng Peng/Lei Wang - The Storm Driven Sea, by Christopher Tin, choreo by Lori Nichols

Definitely the best choreo of the bunch, gets bumped from first place because Peng/Wang are a new pair and it shows. We sadly did not get the performance that short program deserved. The drama the position, the intensity... Unmatched.

Deanna Stellato-Dudek/Maxime Deschamps - Oxygen, by Cirque du Soleil choreo by Julie Marcotte

I HATED the music at the start of the season. The loud breathing triggered my misophonia and the vocals were grating.

I love it ! It's unlike anything else in the current pairs' field. Cirque du Soleil doesn't get more Québécois than that. The step sequence is fun. The lift rocks.

1st - Annika Hocke/Robert Kunkel - I Love Rock and Roll, by Joan Jett, choreo by Luca Lanotte

Speaking of rock... Best short of the season hands down. Gorgeous lifts with hard and creative dismount? Check! Massive throw jump? Check! Big twist? Check! Great step sequence with loads of attitude? Check! Music that will make the audience loose it? You bet! Performance levels? Unmatched!

Of fucking course they judges hated it and they were robbed blind at worlds.

[apurikottotii]

feburary song recs!

this month was also CRAZY. first few days of the month were incredibly sinusoidal. i got really close with some friends, because some friends were being incredibly distant. almost threw up from disgust/stress at one point lol. but it worked out fine and the middle of the month was really fun. it reassured me that things were going to be okay. unfortunately things aren't always perfect so that doubt and mistrust keeps creeping up on me, but to be honest i don't really care much anymore. is it alright to let some things fade away?

--- newton dance - nayutalien x chinozo

okay so i heard this ruinene cover- from project sekai: a new voice, i think- on youtube and it's so cool. the voices fit so well (BOTH OF THEM) and the song is perfect for them and so cute. i love the theme of sciencey space love songs nayutalien does. it's SO CUTE. "can't fight your pull of gravity!" is so sweet. the tuning style makes it even more cuter. dfnisdfjnasdjfnadk. and nayutalien has a way of writing songs that scratch that itch in my brain- maybe it's the harmonic minor lol.

--- speak now - taylor swift

listen. i don't listen to pop. i don't like pop. i hate taylor swift. however. however. i love the story this songs tells. it's such a stereotypical straight story, I KNOW. but who doesn't love a stereotypical sort of sweet love story once in a while. the instrumentation is simple yet unique (for pop lol). the way she structures the chorus is different from other songs i've seen.

--- kosho yashiki satsujin jiken - teniwoha

otherwise known as "murder case at the mansion of antiquarian books". I LOVE SONGS THAT TELL A STORY (can you tell??) ESPECIALLY. MURDER. CASES. THAT. IS. SO COOL. sadly the lyrics are hard to understand but i still love it anyways. i especially love the wonderlands x showtime cover because the "sho" and "lie" parts are emphasized when you have several different voices, in different octaves, with different timbres. I LOVE EMU'S VOICE IN THIS. her cutesy voice is mixed with her lower register and it sounds GREAT. this is one of the (few) songs that work with her very cutesy childish voice. the line distribution makes this song so delicious. and oh my god. EVERY CHORUS. PUSHES. DOWN. A HALF STEP. THAT. IS SO COOL. it keeps dropping when you expect it to end or go higher. SADFNAISDUFNAISUDFIU. teniwoha, thank you.

--- sobakasu - judy and mary

ANOTHER recommendation from a friend. took some time to grow on me. what i find interesting is how the verses and instrumental breaks sound very different (pop vs. rock). my favorite part of this song is how raw and genuine it sounds. it's so catchy i hear myself humming this throughout the day. it's really just a sweet song (about love i think... something like love is like a freckle you can't get rid of ...?). the chorus loops in my mind. the way the singer sings it is so aosdfnasdfnjasdj. makes me smile.

--- new rules - dua lipa

okay i swear i don't like pop. i swear. i just heard it in my dance team's playlist and was like "wow i hate how much they play this song" then proceeded to loop it. i'm NOT going to say it's relatable. i'm not.

--- this is how to be in love with you/umbilical in milgram project

mahiru's cv works so well in this song. and i love the es cv cover too. this song itself is so sweet and makes you feel very warm and fuzzy though it's a little sinister lol. like... this is HOW TO BE IN LOVE WITH YOU?? what an awesome title. i really love the line that goes "if you're kind to me, i'm going to start relying on you, so thanks" or something. it's just such a fun vibe. i love when she sings "o-ver-heat" and "AI NAN DESU YO".

it's getting late so i will just say: yuno is relatable. let's reload the warmth y'all. light the oxygen on fire. or something. "i hope i can be someone you like."

honorary mentions: ke mu san (this meme song SLAPS my #1 listened to lol. the dance is addicting to watch)

[lupinus-bicolor]

thinking about drying some of my black nightshade seeds since a lot of people in that post say they're interested in trying them. They're easier to grow than tomatoes and an established bunch produces about 2x as many fruits a commercial cherry tomato plant (with the caveat that the berries are uniformly 1cm wide). idk if that's something people would like but when i get my garden shit more organized id like to start sending seed packets to folks :'3

adding the rest of this under the cut cause i tend to ramble

Solanum americanum (the species i grow) is native or naturalized almost worldwide but does well with moderate but regular watering and a bit of shade. Check out its wild range on the iNaturalist map; if you live around these areas, chances are your plant will do well.

In my experience it likes to grow up to a foot high and branch out laterally along the ground, but it can be trained upward by pruning if you're growing a lot of these guys in a smaller space. It will also more than likely attract aphids, but they're not a huge problem for the plant nor for berry production, and the ants that cohabitate with them are fun to watch. They might help with pollination too, but i havent actually watched them closely enough to see if they make a difference :p

oh yeah they're also deer resistant! as someone who literally can't grow tomatoes because the shit ass fucking deer keep gnawing them to the ground, these are a godsend and they scratch the itch to grow some kind of solanum in my garden.

They also taste like little sweet tomatoes! as for culinary uses, I'm sadly not a huge fan of tomato, so my experience with S. americanum starts and ends with pasta and salsa. I'm sure there's tons you can do with this awesome black nightshade, but im the wrong person to ask. Purple salsa is a really really cool thing to bring out around guests though :D

if i do go through with drying my seeds n shit I'll make a little propagation card to go in the packets and mail them out for free, for as long as my supply lasts. if you want some more solanum propaganda check out Alexis Nikole's tiktok :) (the same rules apply between S. nigrum and S. americanum, nigrum is just native to europe and africa)

[amaurotine-daydreaming]

I. Envoy

Hythlemet finds herself sitting against the trunk of a fallen tree just beyond the perimeter of Fanow, like a naughty child told to sit in a corner. The sting of being separated from the other Scions, of being banished to the edge of the village, itches in her breast. It makes her heart pound. It makes her want to scratch at her skin.

“Hythlemet?” asks a soft voice. “Can I…May I sit down?”

Hythlemet rests her head against the weather-worn tree and rolls her head toward the speaker. The young woman they call Minfilia hovers at a respectful distance, waiting. Hythlemet loosely gestures her over.

“They’re allowing you to sit with me?” Hythlemet asks sardonically, as Minfilia settles down beside her.

“Yes?” Minfilia’s brow furrows. “They–the Viis–said we could do as we wished. And when the discussion turned to you, well…” she shrugs sadly, “I was told to run along like a good girl.”

Thancred’s doing, no doubt, Hythlemet thinks. He seems hellsbent on believing the only way to protect his charge is to treat her like a child, rather than respecting the adult burden she has been tasked to carry. More than once since arriving in the First, Hythlemet wants to cuff him on the side of the head.

With no other recourse, Hythlemet huffs out a laugh tinged with bitterness. “Aye, well. At least we have each other for company.”

“Why are you out here?”

Hythlemet gestures toward the wooden domiciles nestled amongst trees with trunks so large one could build an entire Lominsan galleon from just one. “They’re trying to decide whether being an ally of Ronka outweighs being an oathbreaker.”

“What?” The bewilderment on Minfilia’s face is an all too familiar feeling to Hythlemet these days. “What oath did you break?”

The itch of anger returns. The way those Fanow sisters had stood over her, inspecting her skin for the chalky texture of a sin eater to-be, their questions relentless. From where do you hail, what was the name of your village, why have you come back to this place and disrespected your sacred oath–

“Evidently, Vier–Viis who leave the Greatwood are forbidden from returning.”

There is confusion in those aetherial-sea eyes. “But you’re from the Exarch’s homeland, aren’t you?”

Hythlemet hunches against the log, her expression sour. “No easy way of explaining that. Not that I hadn’t tried.” Bloody harpies.

“I see…” Minfilia draws her knees close to her chest and hugs them. Then:

“It’s hard, isn’t it?”

“Hm?” Hythlemet grunts.

“Having people decide your fate for you,” Minfilia explains, her eyes cast down, “and not even allowing you to be a part of the conversation.”

Hythlemet lets out a heavy breath, rolling her head back to face forward, towards Fanow. “That it is.”

The itch of anger worsens, but Hythlemet wills it down, not wanting an outburst to startle Minfilia into flight. Although Hythlemet knows Minfilia to be a fierce and steadfast fighter on the battlefield, in moments like this she feels as delicate as the thinnest glass.

“I don’t understand why they call me the Oracle,” Minfilia confesses to the silence. “I can’t see the future. I don’t know when this fight will end.”

Hythlemet watches her from the corner of her eye. Minfilia fiddles with the end of the ribbon that twines itself through a clump of strands of her blonde hair. “I feel more like…a standard-bearer. An envoy of some kind. When people see me, they see a message.” 

“Of hope,” Hythlemet states.

“Of hope,” Minfilia echoes. She nods.

Hythlemet fully looks at her now. “Could you do something for me?”

Minfilia lifts her head, startled. “O-of course. What is it?”

“Sit like this.” Hythlemet scoots forward, away from the log, and stretches her own legs out straight in front of her. 

Minfilia stops hugging her knees and stretches out her legs alongside Hythlemet. “Like this?”

Hythlemet nods. “Don’t forget your arms.” She stretches her own out behind her, her palms resting in the grass.

Minfilia looks over her shoulder as she places one hand behind herself, and does the same for the other. 

“There you go,” Hythlemet says. “Don’t be afraid to take up space. Like this.” She lifts her arms skyward and then falls backward onto the grass, her arms fully extended. Her fingertips just barely tickle the log behind her. 

She looks over at Minfilia. 

“Oh,” Minfilia says, with something akin to wonder, but nevertheless scoots forward to give herself room to follow suit. As before, she opts for a more cautious approach, levering herself down first on one forearm, then the other. She glances at Hythlemet, checking her thrown back arms, and slowly lifts her own above her head.

“Aye, that’s the way,” Hythlemet says. “How does it feel?”

Minfilia chews her lip. “A bit…frightening, if I’m honest. As though I’m leaving myself open. I-I mean I am, I suppose, but it’s more than that?” She sighs. “It’s hard to explain.”

“It’s not an unreasonable way to feel,” Hythlemet says with a half-shrug. “Particularly from what I have seen of this world.”

“Mmm…” Minfilia begins to draw her legs up again, but Hythlemet places a hand over hers.

“I’ve got you,” she says, and points to her big, fluffy Viera ears. “Nothing will sneak up on us.”

That makes Minfilia smile. She relaxes, just a little.

“And if you didn’t feel afraid,” Hythlemet states.

“Hmmm…” Minfilia’s eyes search the heavens, which this deep in the forest is mainly a dull haze where the Light tries to penetrate through the canopy but doesn’t quite succeed. She hesitates.

“Free.”

“Free,” now it is Hythlemet’s turn to echo, as they lie there together along the perimeter. “That is well.”

[space-blue]

okay first of all how does anyone bear to do asks i need to keep switching between two tabs trying to figure out what questions i'm trying to ask, there's got to be an easier way-- BUT right, Behind the Scenes asks: 1, 5, 12, 18 PLEASE, and 23. (PS am i supposed to ask so many? prob not. screw it, i'm greedy (PPS am i supposed to be anon rn idk if that's correct etiquette)) THANKS!

I jot the numbers down somewhere if I'm getting overwhelmed. You did great though! And no, there is no etiquette on how many to ask, don't worry. If there's a double I'll just send you to the other ask. More means I get to talk about fic more, which is great! :3

What was the first fandom and/or pairing that you wrote fic for?

Star Wars, Thrawn x OC. I was pretty sauced. I think I have some great moments in there, and I was free to create all the banter I wanted, etc. But it suffers a LOT from me being completely new to multi chapter work. I go into meandering tengeants and don't know when to stop on the world building. It had its fans and really dragged me into the whole fanfic universe though. Maybe one day I'll finish it, but I had no idea which way to go. I feel like I wrote myself in a corner, somewhat haha

5. What is the perfect environment for you to write in?

I don't mind loud spaces like cafes or pubs, so long as the music isn't obnoxious and I can hear my own. I just like places where nobody is going to come to me to interrupt me. Sadly I live and work in a backpacker hostel, meaning I have 50 odd housemates at any given time, without counting the 250 guests. I get interrupted a LOT. So right now, hidden in my bed or hunkering down at my fav cafe, would be my answer.

12. Is there a trope you haven’t written yet but really want to?

Yes! There's this Tarkin & Ahsoka fic I mentioned in this ask. It focuses on the amnesia trope. I really, really like to write sort of mind fucky things from character PoV. So Tarkin struggling with shattered memories and having to rebuild himself while trusting this total stranger… Hard. Especially when WE all know she's lying to him to try and use him for her side, because the rebellion just needs the help that badly. I do need to make better research on real amnesia before I apply scifi logic to it... And I need to not be hyperfixation on Quaritch's blue ass. His own trope scratches a similar itch, since he's a clone with implanted memories. So identity crisis as well...

18. What is a line/scene you’re really proud of? Give us the DVD commentary for that scene.

OK ok I have this entry from my Hannibal ficlets that focuses on a secret inside the "mind palace" Hannibal Lecter has. I've read all three relevant Hannibal books, watched the films, all TV series… And then I read the book Piranesi by Susanna Clarke. It's excellent and I recommend it. It focuses on a man living inside an enormous house that has three levels going in all directions, with clouds in the top level and a sea with rushing tides in the bottom. There are statues everywhere… And birds… And it's very WTF and it takes you a long time to understand what's going on. It's in this man's pov too which thickens the mystery.

I love the works of Piranesi. He's an italian architect and archaelogist who once got sick. 22 yo and delirious with fever, he sketched a series of 'infinite prisons' which you can see here!

So I'm writing this tiny daily ficlet, trying to stick as close to 200 words as I can, and I was folding myself into a piranesian pretzel trying to FIT THE DAMN EXPRESSION in. Making Hannibal's mind palace into a piranesian thing.

There is a corner of his mind always plagued by snow. It is a torturous journey there, through labyrinthine passages, down echoing stairwells and across bridges arcing over the piranesian landscape of his palace. It is easy to lose one's way, to be distracted by the vaulted ceilings of a chapel, the confines of well used hideouts, or the familiar outlines of his Baltimore office. But if he keeps walking, fingers brushing against all the door-frames of all the halls of his mind, eventually they alight on damp wood, cold and brittle. 

[he's off to visit his baby sister, who he keeps in there. He was forced to eat her by soldiers as a child, yeah it's dark]

23. If you had to remix one of your own fics, which would it be and how would you remix it?

I'm not super hung up on this idea. I write and move on. I have 151 works currently and I've been on ao3 for not even 3 years. So as you can imagine I have a tendency to create a new work rather than worry about remixing.

This being said I'd probably completely retool my very first fic, as per answer 1. I'd change the OC, shorten the plot by A LOT, get the action started sooner, completely drop a lot of worldbuilding… It's a slog, which can be very sweet in a fanfic when you're enjoying the slog content, but dear lord, it makes for awkward re-reading. I'd make the OC an alien instead of a human raised by aliens. Too much going on.

[littledreamling]

Tag 9 people you’d like to get to know better

I was tagged by @virgo-dream @mathomhouse-e @sonata-ix @hopefulpenance AND @quillingwords (thank you all!)

3 ships:

Dreamling, obviously

CJ/Flick from Animal Crossing because they're my comfort gays (though I've never read fanfic about them, I just squeal happily whenever they talk about each other in the game)

Me/a function sleep schedule

First ever ship: sadly, Johnlock from BBC Sherlock. Not something I'm particularly proud to admit, but I can't change it so I might as well embrace it

Last song: Currently I'm listening to a playlist that isn't mine, so I'm not counting it because it's more for background noise (though it's currently on Better Days by Birdtalker). Instead, I'll count the last song I played on purpose, and that would be In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel because everything he did went hard as fuck

Last movie: Mamma Mia, if only to introduce my parents to the majesty that is Meryl Streep, Colin Firth, Pierce Brosnan, and Stellan Skarsgard all drunk out of their minds, singing ABBA songs. It's not my favorite movie of all time, but it does have a soft spot in my heart

Currently reading: So many things. Lots of fanfic, The Collected Works of Edgar Allen Poe, The Neil Gaiman Reader, The God Equation, The Book: A History of the Bible, The Sandman comics, The Graveyard Book and American gods by Neil Gaiman... I have the attention span of a pygmy goat and far too little time to actually read anything

Currently watching: Absolutely nothing, due to the aforementioned lack of time. I have quite a few things on my To-Watch list, including Mank, Victoria, Hunt for the Wilderpeople, Peaky Blinders, His Dark Materials, Letterkenny, the list goes on

Currently consuming: dark chocolate, specifically Ghirardelli 60% baking chocolate. It's my writing snack and my guilty pleasure that I don't feel that guilty about

Currently craving: whatever my mom is making for dinner, which I can already smell from downstairs. A good night's sleep (or a better sleeping schedule). A box of matches so I can light a candle in my room. More time and motivation to write. A song that scratches every itch in my brain and also never gets old so I can listen to it on repeat for the rest of my life. Water, because my water bottle is empty. To live life to its absolute fullest (okay Hob, calm down)

Because I was tagged by so many people (thank you!!) I'm not sure who to tag and who hasn't done it, so I'll just tag people and if you don't want to, you don't have to!

@levi1088 @birdbraintm @staroftheendless @pellaaearien @fishfingersandscarves @sunsetcurveauto @delta-pavonis @historyandqueershenanigans and @btwimkindagay

If anyone else wants to do it, consider this your tag!!

[decayedhearts]

@splitcards​ sent:  " i still can't believe how tall you are ... "  the question is more of a pouting disappointment, sadly eating the quiche as cater watches trey work his magic in the kitchen.  " can't you spare some inches for little ol' me over here? i'd love to rack up some cool points too, y'know. "

After cutting the dough into little stripes, Trey starts to braid them with the speed and skill of someone having done it countless times. This is probably his favorite part about making plaited buns but he remembers a time when it was his greatest source of frustration. Cater’s lament makes him chuckle - first because it’s cute and then because Cater accidentally said something naughty without realizing. The itch to make him aware of it is there, but Trey resists the urge to scratch it.

He takes the compliment even though Cater is not offering the most splendid delivery - but he’s always been somewhat proud of his height and to hear that Cater is jealous about it is oddly flattering.      “I think you get plenty of cool points as it is,” Trey offers. “And you’re not exactly small yourself.” Just stand next to Riddle, he almost adds. (But that’s a little mean.)

He puts the last bun on the baking tray and moves to wash his hands. Time for decoration. A hidden smirk tugs at the corner of Trey’s mouth as he walks over to Cater, who’s leaning against the kitchen counter with his plate of quiche, and stops just close enough their bodies don’t touch yet. Raising his arm he reaches for something on the top shelf behind Cater, the movement bringing him even closer to the other boy. For a few seconds their faces are very much within kissing-distance before Trey lowers back down. “Being tall does have some perks, though,” he says in a quieter voice.

Then he steps away, a bag of sugar crystals that he picked from the shelf in his hand. “Leave some room for dessert, will you?” he says as he pours a few crystals into his hand and sprinkles them over the buns. “If you like I can make it sweet-chili flavored for you.”

[thousandth-island]

Maybe Frye for the ask thing?

First impression: Immediately the moment I saw her take off her mask I thought she was just the cutest thing ever! I love OTH’s reveal, but nothing has ever come closer to replicating the feeling of me watching this video in 2015 and seeing Callie for the first time, she just had my whole heart. I loved all of Deep Cut ofc, i went insane from each and every one of them, but she scratched the itch in my brain for cutesy stuff. I also thought her eyelashes and purple fingertips were really cool, sadly i could see the forehead jokes coming :(

Impression now: I still think she’s adorable, but she’s probably a lot more skilled and reserved than she lets on. I also think it is so funny that she thinks she’s scary when really i think she’s just as cringefail as Shiver 💕 Maybe a little less, but still more than Big Man.

Favorite moment: I love how they animate her body language. From the big gestures, which she does a lot of (like during story mode when Deep Cut comes to claim the treasure for the last time), to the little ones like when she’s laughing with Deep Cut and peeks over at Shiver, I find that so so cute.

Idea for a story: Currently still writing atwb, which partially focuses on her, but if I had to write something just about Frye, I’d probably make it a heist story.

Unpopular opinion: not even an unpopular opinion but the forehead jokes were never funny. And people who went on entire rants ab the forehead and how it needed to change or whatever just to hop on the bandwagon for cheap clout? Couldn’t stand it.

Favorite relationship: Deep Cut as a friend group is so cute, and I’m a sucker for middle school friends. They’re so ride or die it’s insane. If you mean a romantic relationship, then probably Shiver and Frye because I like how well matched they are. Yeah I’m boring, you can throw tomatoes 😔

Favorite headcanon: We’ve heard her rap before and we know from the interview she writes her rap verses so I think she not only spits bars but she would think cupcakke is the funniest thing ever. She’d put it on just to get a rise out of Shiver and Big Man. She knows every word. I like to think that she also sometimes speaks way too loud or way too quiet without noticing, but Shiver and Big Man don’t find it annoying at all.

[sheeplessthings]

What will your character do if they're stressed, for everyone you want to do, which hopefully are a lot of your peeps! :D

Oh, thank u so much for your ask! It actually got me writing and not the typical: "yeah, yeah, I reblog, that post, because I'll definitely look at it again in the future" xD

I took the "for as many as your peeps as you want" literally and turned this into an inspiration task for a lot of OCs I'm working on right now (some you know, of course! :D)

I also ranked them on how well they handle stress for some extra fun.

Catharina Hewitt (Mephistopheles)

10/10

The venter

Living with Sebastian has made her perfect her anti-stress routine

Generally quite stress resistant - I mean you gotta if you're Sebastian's best friend, but she genuinely takes good care of her mental and physical health

takes the more normal and healthier route compared to her self-destructive friend and usually vents her stress and problems to someone. Shouldn't that be possible, she tries to distract herself with things she loves to do like knitting and watching silly movies

always makes sure to take to rest and haye time to recharge to keep stress to a minimum

Jenna Walden (Of Tigers and Roses)

9/10

The worrier

“I mean it did come true that one time!"

can't help but overthink, especially when she's stressed. Has all the worst possible scenarios in her head, which never come true (except for that one time), and stresses over every single one of them

can still pull herself together most of the time and generally tries to shake off this worrying habit

sometimes needs another person to calm her down tho, or she'll get lost in doomsday scenarios

Only exception: Anything job related. As a police officer she can't afford to react to stress the way she does privately, so on the job she enters work mode. But then again, it's also something else to be stressed because of others, or stress yourself out.

Anthony Tiger (Of Tigers and Roses)

8.5/10

The hard-working one

Pre-Jenna Tony could've never ranked this high - he would've been at the far bottom of this list (his motto in the past was: "People can't stress you, if they're not alive” 😌) And look where this boy with Jenna and therapy is ranking now *wiping a proud tear away* 🥹

It's not perfect and he's trying, but at least he's communicating when something stresses him out and is not trying to let it out physically on others

Bonus points for actually using the tips his therapist gave him to locate and analyze his stressors

Sol (*story still needs a name*)

8/10

The physical one

Keep a ten-feet radius, unless you wanna fight

Kinda ldepends on the stressor, but especially when it concerns his friends he gets stressed easily (Sucks for him that all his friends seem to have a death wish and boi is stressed about them constantly)

likes to shake it off by working out and pushing his limits to be so exhausted his body has no other choice then falling asleep when he goes to bed

If he cannot work out ... well, good luck. I would advise not getting him angry, because he's itching for a fight (he learns to control himself more as he gets older)

He generally gets more chill the older he gets

Bear/Caleb Levis (Mephistopheles)

7.5/10

The nail biter

“Can you hug me?"

Crumbles like pasta in boiling water when stressed

His poor nails don't get a rest when he's stressed out, because he cannot stop biting or scratching at them until they bleed

Like Catharina he also likes to vent, unless he has no one to talk to. Then he tries to "man up" and handle the stress himself by trying to ignore it as long as possible (and then it comes back all at one to bite at his ankles like a hungry dog and makes Bear break down in tears)

Seeks comfort in hugs and cuddles

A pet would help wonders with his stress, but sadly money is tight

Apollo (Mass Effect)

7/10

The activist

More money = less stress 👍

Money can buy you anything. Friends, happiness, your family, so why not stress relief as well? Just focus on money to get rid of your stress.

Now focus on it a little more.

And a little more

And just a little more, and - oh, wow your problems are gone! (You might make some people a little angry tho, who are now after you)

Usually very chill and rarely stressed (has a military background after all), but if he experiences stress it's like the worst ever. Like right now bro is so stressed out he fights the system to calm down; in his defense: he has a daughter and children are stressful as heck (especially when kidnapped)

More hands-on stress relief would be tinkering on his long-term robot project

Calisia (Mass Effect)

5.5/10

The crier

Girl, you're a Turian, what are you doing?? 😭

What was all the military training for??

The Human mercenary you partnered up with is more composed than you and his daughter is being kidnapped?? 😩

Nervous and overwhelmed all the time and no one has ever told her how to handle it or cope in any way, so she cries a lot

Human mercenary needs to gentle-parent her into handling her feelings and get more confident

Sebastian Marlowe (Mephistopheles)

5/10

The stress smoker

Fidgeting, like damn boy we get it your hands need to move, but can you keer'em still! for FIVE SECONDS??

Ranks surprisingly low for such an indifferent and calm and collected dude, but appearances do lie

His reaction to stress depends on the type. Work stress has all his problem-solving skills kicking into gear: find the problem, analyze it, come up with a practical solution. He rarely gets stressed at work and if he does, he enjoys it. Because stress means there is something to do - he is needed - and his field of work also demandis it of him to handle stress well (deadlines for his books, complicated costumers for his drawings, and handling the most chaotic theatre in existence need him to say calm under pressure)

Personal stress? Ah well ... he handles it about as well as a shark handles the desert

Bear can tell by the amount of smoking breaks he takes in a day on how bad it is

doesn't talk about what stresses him and buries it until the physical symptoms are so bad, he eventually gets sick and has to spent all day in bed with a high fever

Seeks comfort in being alone and drawing/writing

Salem (You’re my special)

2/10 (but boy never had anyone in his life to teach him how to handle stress)

The substance abuser

Fight or flight? Wrong, it's freeze

Can't sit still, needs to move constantly

Would love to vent to someone but his stress always got ridiculed and not taken seriously by others, and so he stopped talking with people altogether

since he has no one to talk to, he has to burden all his stress alone and needs to find a way to cope with it. At first his body tried to handle it with nightmares, but then he only refused to sleep and so he turned to alcohol and drugs instead

seriously needs a hug, but sadly I have worse things planned for him

Ivan Borisovitch Petrov (Prussian Blue)

0/10

The alcoholic

Vodka

Wy (*story needs a name*)

-10/10

The lip-biter

Last time he was stressed it almost killed him

Master said, you should only stress about things you can control. But he doesn't have control over a single aspect of his life and feels stressed constantly. So, how does that work?

His lips have never seen a day of rest and yet he can't stop biting them, even if it hurts

doesn't know how to handle anything and it immediately shows in his health, he already gets sick easily but stress quickens the process even faster - Also, very prone to mental health issues

Seeks comfort in physical touch, but Master made him hate it

[tailsrevane]

[book review] star trek: discovery: fear itself by james swallow (2018)

(spoilers)

i was thoroughly not expecting this, but this was pretty easily one of the best star trek novels i’ve ever read.

i’m always happy to return to the shenzhou, though sadly it looks like this is the last thing currently published that scratches that particular itch. i would really love a series of novels or comics set aboard the shenzhou, but it seems like media tie-in publishing isn’t favoring those sort of lengthy series like the old 80s and 90s star trek novels. the tradeoff is that what we are getting seems to be of a much more consistent quality than when we were getting just piles of novels and comics of varying quality. i’m pretty okay with this trade.

the focus character of this novel is saru, and i love him on the show, but i wasn’t sure i was going to be super enthusiastic about a novel from his perspective? and wow, was i ever wrong on that front. and despite the limitations on this being both a media tie-in and a prequel, it managed to give him the kind of meaningful character growth that you would expect on a particularly great episode of an actual star trek series.

the structure of the overarching story is also pretty fantastic. it starts out fairly low-stakes with the shenzhou investigating a damaged probe. the tholians are in the distant background as the looming threat, but for the majority of the book it seems like they might be a red herring. things get more complicated when the shenzhou rescues a badly-damaged ship seemingly over that ship’s crew’s strenuous objections. the situation quickly escalates when a fight breaks out between that crew and their passengers, and saru–who wasn’t even supposed to still be on the ship–ends up as the senior officer present when the shenzhou’s chief engineer is incapacitated in a firefight.

saru finds himself as a hostage and struggling to maintain the confidence of his subordinate officers. at one point the pressure becomes so intense that he fabricates a reason he needs to sit alone (guarded, of course) on the docked shuttlecraft just so he doesn’t feel everyone watching him. it just feels so real and relatable, you can’t help but feel for him.

this really is the turning point of the novel, as saru’s next action is to fabricate an excuse to need to consult the rest of his landing party and he quickly wins back their confidence and devises a frankly brilliant scheme to escape their captivity. there’s a series of messy fights between various competing factions that saru navigates deftly, and when all is said and done he really does end up proving himself, even if it’s hard for him to see it.

oh, and that tholian red herring? yeah, the last few chapters are a series of three increasingly desperate space battles against them, with the shenzhou arriving just in time to join the decisive battle. pretty epic stuff.

s-rank

[novasdarling]

Just A Kiss

TW: Noncon, Stalking, Breaking and Entering, Manipulation Sorta, Aged Up, Female Reader

Todo felt like his whole life was complete now. A missing piece had finally fallen into his hands. The piece being you, you were the piece that made him whole. That made his heart beat faster, made him smile with just a single thought. You were his and he was yours. Todo was sure of it, you two belonged with each other, soulmates. It was only right that you two would be together so he wasn't wrong with how he felt. It was destiny, it was only right.

You on the other hand weren't aware of his growing feelings. A part of him knew that, knew you weren't like him, but he liked to pretend you were simply just shy. It was all about playing hard to get with you. But you didn’t need to, not after he saved your life a few weeks ago. It annoyed him a bit, he deserved to have you. He could provide, take good care of you. All he needed was to have you open up to him. It was delusional, Todo wasn't being rational. Yet, that failed to stop his reasoning.

Todo had met you when he saved a few civilians from a powerful curse bothering a park. It was an easy job for him, he had years of practice with these types of curses. You had been with some friends out late. Sitting in the park to drink and eat. A perfect target for the curse. Something your kind would never know.

Usually, he tried to keep himself not known by civilians. However, this time, he was unable to stay in the shadows. Making himself seen to keep the group safe. Exercising the curse rather quickly. It should have been a typical job. Nothing that would normally linger in his mind. Nevertheless, you changed that. He locked eyes with you and just knew you were the one. Sadly your group ran before he could ask you your name, or say hello. It was unfortunate, but that didn’t stop him. He was lucky to find you a week later. Todo liked to think it was a sign from the universe when he bumped into you at a cafe. A sign that he ignored involved him stalking and researching all he could. Finding your daily routine, including the fact you visit this cafe regularly.

You didn’t recognize him after all, it was dark that night. You both talked a bit, he even got your number. To him, you both clicked so well. You laughed at his jokes, smiled at him. It pulled him in and made him feel loved. Almost like you two had been dating for years already. His mind began to fantasize as he watched you speak. Picturing you two as a loving couple, him coming home to you every day, the date nights you two would have. After the first encounter, he only got worse. His imagination was becoming reality to him. Every time he watched you, it wasn’t stalking, but rather a loving boyfriend checking on his partner. The nights he watched you sleep from the corners of your bedroom. You completely unknowing of his presence, or even that he knew where you lived. To him though, he was just admiring his precious girl. Loving how peaceful she looked sleeping. When he undid his belt and began to touch himself. Well, there was not really a way to rationalize it. All he could do was pretend it wasn’t happening.

It didn’t take long for Todo to demand more of your attention. “Bumping” into you was beginning to get out of hand. He saw how you looked at him now. There wasn’t that smile when you saw him. It was morphing into worry. Then he realized his texts were becoming less answered, even when he send over ten in a row. He couldn’t lose you. Todo needed to do something to save the relationship. To make you see what he does. Perhaps you were unsure of his devotion to you, he needed to change that. That was how he got here, watching you get ready for bed through the crack in your closet door. He needed to make sure you were okay, to talk to you. It was like an itch that kept spreading, only getting tougher to ignore. Spreading and begging to be scratched.

He wasn’t sure how he would confront you about your relationship issues, after all, he was in your closet without you knowing. He was a coward, he should be able to talk to you. You were his and couples should talk freely about any problems that arise. It wasn't right to be hiding there, to be watching as you undressed and got into your pyjamas. It wasn't proper to drool at the way you did your hair for bed. None of it was right, but Todo kept excusing it. Stating it was all okay in the grand scheme of things.

The itch got worse. Watching you sleeping there, looking so beautiful and peaceful. He needed you, needed to have you with him. He should be sleeping beside you. Waking up to your beautiful face every day. Getting up early for work, bringing you a coffee while you slowly wake up. He knew how you liked it. Watched you make it almost every morning. Todo could be so good for you, you just needed to see him do all of that. The itch was too strong now, he needed to scratch it. Just a bit, just enough till next time. Enough to hold him off for a few days. Stepping out of the closet. Watching his step, trying not to make any noise or disturb your room too much. You look so beautiful laying there. Peaceful, like you were comfortable with him being there. See, you were fine with him. You had to be. He just worried too much. You even let out a soft moan when he began to pet your hair. Leaning into his touch.

By the time you noticed his presence he was resting his forehead on yours, eyes closed. Breathing you in while his hands played with your hair. He never felt more at peace than now. Too bad it was short lived. He was torn out of his fantasy at your voice.

“A-Aoi”

It was so soft, barely above a whisper. Opening his eyes to meet yours staring at him. You looked worried, shocked he was there in your room. You had no idea he knew where you lived. Let alone that he would break into your place. The two of your just stared at each other. Unsure of what to do, waiting for the other to make the first move. This only led Todo to read the situation wrong. In his eyes, you were accepting him. It wasn’t fear that had you frozen, rather it was love. The moment felt right, he leant down to place his lips on yours. He had waited so long for this. Ignoring the way, you didn’t kiss back. Figuring it was the shyness. Wanting him to take the lead on things, something he’d happily oblige.

“S-Stop. How-Why-”

Todo hushed you. Not wanting to hear you reject him. No, you weren't, you were just shy. You needed to let him help. You were both destined to be together. He liked so much of the same things you did. If you only gave him a reasonable chance. More than just coffee dates or “run-ins”. This could all be so good, so right. Ignoring your words, trying to deepen the kiss. Using his hands in your hair to support himself and keep you in place. Pretending your pleas for him to stop, were actually pleas for more. That they were confirmation of love. His whole body encompassed yours, keeping you down on the bed. Todo was gone. He was unable to see reality now. Too caught up in his ideals, his fantasies with you. While this was a clear assault on you. In his eyes, it was too lovers finally having their first kiss. There was no use fighting him. He was so much bigger and stronger. What could you really do? Perhaps in the back of his mind, he knew all of that. Ignoring it for his own fabrications.

Todo pulled away and stared at you. Looking over every detail of your face. You were so precious, looking up at him all wide-eyed. He finally had you here, under him. Touching you and kissing you. Hushing you when you tried to speak again.

“Shh, it’s okay. I’ll take good care of you baby.” He nuzzled his face in your hair, inhaling and moaning. “So good to me.”

There was no fight in you. You weren't sure why, but no matter how scared you were. No matter how much he kissed and touched you, you just couldn’t do more than lame pushes and pleas. Things he ignored easily. Todo disregarded it all, even when you began to dissociate. Closing your eyes and pretending he wasn’t there. All he could do was touch and kiss you. He was worried about moving too fast. A laughable thought considering what was happening.

He waited until you had fallen back asleep before slipping out the door. Leaving no real trace that he was there. The next morning it all seemed like a dream to you. No marks, nothing missing. There was nothing to prove what happened, actually happened. Maybe that was what made it easy for you to dismiss it as a weird dream. Todo was lucky that you didn’t think too hard about it. He didn’t want to have to do something so drastic so soon again. His reasoning told him he was being intense that night. Taking a huge risk with those kisses. It seemed you were still too shy for them. He guessed you needed some space, some time to think. So, he avoided you. Let you have some space from him. It was torture. Watching you from afar again, but it was what was needed.

A few weeks had passed by, all you saw of him was the occasional run-in on the street. He paid you little attention, solidifying the idea that that night was all in your head. Todo was too causal with you to have broken into your house, to have pinned you down and kissed you. He barely acted like you were there now. This was how he wanted things, back to normal. You suspecting nothing of him. Eventually, though, he would make the night a permanent reality. Soon you would open up to him more. All he needed to do was control himself better. To let you set the pace. Then you would want him just as much too, he wouldn’t need to follow you in the shadows. Until then, he'll need to be more careful with his nightly visits.