#season 1 neverland au

[donteattheappleshook]

Not Broken At All Chapter 16/?

Summary:

A season 1 Neverland AU. Emma is still trying to adjust to her new life as Sheriff of Storybrooke and mom to Henry, who still believes everyone in town is a fairytale creature. When she finds a badly beaten, one handed man while patrolling, she’s convinced he’s crazy. He is, after all, rambling about fairies and shadows and crocodiles. But when Henry is suddenly taken out the window of a house everyone believes is haunted, the madman in the hospital might be her only hope of getting her son back. Whether he likes it or not.

Rated E

Catch up on Ao3 (where my italics work) or on Tumblr 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Oh hey, remember me? Remember this story I haven't updated in a year…… Please don't hate me lol Sorry for how long this took - this chapter was just impossible to write and time just kept passing. I'm hoping there won't be such a long break again but I know better than to make promises.

Hopefully some of you are still reading this and enjoy this new chapter!

Note that I made a small change to the last chapter (which fixed this one). You don't have to read it, just know that the lost boys who died on the beach are still out there.

Anyway… here you go! Sorry!

Thank you as always to @the-darkdragonfly for letting me just throw ideas at you about this story all the time and putting up with all the changes! 💕💕 And thank you @kmomof4 for looking this over and helping me decide on the ending 💕 (You can blame her! I kid... mostly)

Small content/trigger warning: This chapter includes more of the aftermath of the hunt. There are no children actively hurt in this chapter but there are bodies and burials and grief.

*******

Part 16

“Mom?”

The thundering of her heart rips her from sleep, hollow and echoing with the blood rushing in her ears, painful in her chest. But there’s only darkness in the small room of the ship, eyes wide and unfocused, the remnants of a dream she can’t remember still making shapes in the dark. She could have sworn she heard it, like it was there in the room with her. But there's no one here - only Killian still in the bed next to her, the arm that had held her close before now outstretched beneath her as he sleeps. A dream. Neverland playing tricks on her - or one of the lost boys above deck calling out to the dark for their mother. 

“Momma?” That one’s real, quieter. One of the children must have found a way down, wandering the halls looking for someone he’ll never find. “Mummy…” That one is heartbreaking. She rises from the bed, Killian not stirring as she slips from the sheets and makes her way quietly across and out of the room. The boys were told not to come down here - better she find whoever it is than one of the pirates. “Mom?” There’s no one there to accompany the sound in the dim light of the lantern outside the cabin and she hesitates, looking towards where the disembodied voice came from. Whoever they are, it sounds like they’re making their way back to the deck on their own… “Mom?” 

The word cuts through her, paralyzes her, heart so tight in her chest she can’t breathe. Henry. She knows his voice - already so deeply ingrained in every part of her being after such a short time that hearing it now is like a piece of herself lost and calling out to be found. 

“Emma?” Softer, getting further away from her - losing him all over again. Her bare feet make no sound as she runs past the crew’s quarters, past the bosun’s room and the galley towards the deck. The door creaks wearily as she climbs the steps and opens it to the night air. The lost boys are asleep - all of them - every single one exhausted from the horrors of the day and she pads carefully through the bodies - sleeping and dead - searching. Henry’s not among them. The ship holds that eerie Neverland silence she can’t get used to, no crashing of waves or rustle of wind, the faint discordant song of the Lorelei the only hiss of sound as it floats in and out on the sea. 

“Mom?” 

Her eyes snap to the back of the Jolly. “Henry?” she hisses. 

“Mom!” Emma nearly stumbles over a sleeping child as she tries to catch up to him before he’s lost to her again. He found her. Of course he did, just like before. She should have known he would. She rounds the helm, heart pounding so violently it reaches the stern before she does. But there’s no one there, again, just an empty deck where a child should be, where her son should be. 

“Where are you?” There’s nowhere else to search, only the sea that surrounds them.

“Emma?” Wendy is standing in front of her, head cocked. “What are you doing up here?” 

She looks towards where her son should be, where the voice no longer calls out to her. There’s nothing there, no one, just the sleeping boys, just Will. 

“Did you see him?”

“See who?” 

“Henry. Did you see him? Did you see where he went?” 

“Henry? There’s no one else up here. It’s just me and the new recruits. You must have been dreaming.”

“I know what I heard. I know my son.” The other woman’s expression turns pitying and Emma’s shoulders tense. “I heard him.” 

Wendy’s frown deepens and when she speaks her voice has the same tone that hers had when she’d been trying to calm Hook in the hospital, the one you use to console a crazy person. “I’m sure you did.”

“It wasn’t a dream.” But even as she says it she starts to doubt her own words. There’s no sign of him, no sign that he was ever here. Wendy wouldn’t lie about that. 

She sighs. “I believe you.” She does, but she also doesn’t believe Henry’s on the ship either. Emma goes to the ship’s edge, careful not to trip over any sprawled limbs, and squints out at the beach against the sun that’s just starting to rise. Maybe he’s not on the Jolly. Maybe he’s somewhere out there. There’s no sign of him on the blood soaked sand and relief settles like a stone in her throat even as the fear of not knowing where he is rises up again. “Neverland plays tricks, Emma.” Wendy joins her at the bow, leaning against the rail, back straight and alert as she looks out at the carnage before them. “You can’t trust anything you hear. The shadows’ll do anything to lure you out.”

“The shadows?”

A nod. “They see into your dreams, see what it is you want most and use it against you. It’s how so many of the boys end up here in the first place.” Wendy’s shoulders sag a little, looking out at the bodies on the beach. It’s the closest Emma’s seen her come to breaking the hard mask she’s worn so well since the hunt started - the real person behind the cold captain. “And now they’ll never leave.”

“What happens to the bodies?” she asks, looking back at the dead, carefully wrapped in sheets on the deck.

“We bury the ones who made it here at sea. Neverland takes back the rest.” 

Emma frowns, eyes darting to the shore. “What do you mean it takes them back?” 

“They become the shadows that live in Dark Hollow, whispering to Pan, finding children, his way of keeping an eye on the outside world. He’ll come at sundown to collect them.” 

“They become the shadows?” she swallows, cold dread tasting bitter at the thought of all those kids having to become Pan’s creatures, forced to do his bidding forever. “The boys?”

Wendy nods and her stomach drops. 

“What about the ones who died here? Will they be shadows too?” 

She shakes his head. “Neverland magic can’t touch this ship. Whatever enchantment’s on it is powerful enough to keep even the darkness away.” Neverland can’t find you here. 

Emma hears her sigh when she looks back out at that beach. “Don’t even think about it.” She’s thinking about it. “He gets to keep his winnings. Those are the rules of the game. Those rules keep us alive.” 

She doesn’t answer, only gives the captain a small nod, thoughts still spinning with the cruelty of it all, that even in death these children can’t escape Pan. Wendy puts a hand on her shoulder, the gesture surprisingly consoling, the mask slipping again. “You’re not the only one who wishes it could be different.” 

Emma nods, grim and defeated, and Wendy pats her shoulder with a tight-lipped smile before turning towards where some of the children have started to stir. 

She wishes she could say she thought about it longer, or at all, really. But all she can think of is every single kid she knew growing up, all the ones who fell through the cracks, the ones who were given up on or abandoned, all the adults who threw up their hands and said there was nothing they could do - that was just how the system worked, that rules had to be followed. Fuck that. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” 

Wendy’s shout echoes above her, cut off by the water when she plunges into it. It takes her deeper than she expected it to, the fall further than she thought, but she kicks wildly, eyes burning against the salt until she breaks the surface. And then she’s swimming, boots and vest heavy against the waves, hat lost somewhere between the ship and the surface, but she keeps going. She can make this swim, she’s made it before - and she has a purpose now. 

She stumbles as she climbs onto the beach, the tide pulling at her knees and then her ankles like it’s trying to draw her back to where it’s safe. Emma fights it, running and slipping across the sand once it’s hot and dry beneath her feet and collapsing beside the first boy she finds. He’s tall and wiry, limbs stretched out, calf-like, not yet grown into his elbows and knees. And now he never will. 

She kneels beside him, stroking his cheek before closing his eyes. Salt water drips onto his skin, turning dried blood fresh again as she tells him she’s sorry - that this happened, that she couldn't do anything to stop it, that Pan gets to keep living. She doesn’t know how long she just sits there with him, looking out at all the other kids who won’t ever go home. 

“Swan…” No. She’s not going back - not leaving them here. She slides her arms under the boy’s shoulders, heaving his limp, heavy frame onto her chest, not sure how she plans to get him back to the ship, just that she will. “Swan.” She ignores it, digging her heels into the sand, trying to plant them under her enough that she can get to her feet. But it slips away beneath her boots and she falls on her ass again and again. She’s not leaving him here. She’s not leaving any of them here.

“Swan.” 

“What!” she snaps, barely looking up at him, wet hair plastered to his face, coat left behind, shirt soaked in water and salt. She can’t get her legs steady enough beneath her, can’t lift the kid any higher into her arms, so she starts to drag him back across the beach, holding tight to his chest as she makes it inch by inch, blonde head rolling limply against her shoulder. 

“Emma,” Killian says softly when she stumbles, she and the boy fall back against the sand. If he says her name one more goddamn time… His hand is gentle on her arm, stopping her as she moves to stand again and she looks up, ready for a fight, whatever she has to, but she’s taking this kid back to his stupid, magical ship where he can rest in fucking peace. 

But his gaze isn’t scolding, not a warning or even pity and he reaches for the boy in her arms, taking his weight from her and hoisting him over his shoulder. He fixes her carefully with a solemn, resolved stare when she stands to meet his gaze. “There’ll be consequences.” 

She looks back towards the shoreline where Will and Wendy are standing by the dinghy. “Do you care?” she asks him, turning to the others, “Do any of you care?” There are more coming out of the water now, pirates and lost boys marching onto the beach.

The residual anger fades from Wendy’s eyes, hardening into something different, and then she kneels beside a small body, this one looking too young to have been on this side of the hunt. “John didn’t make it off the beach,” is all she says before lifting him from the sand and meeting Emma’s eyes with equal determination. 

Will shrugs. “Pan already wants me dead,” he says, bending to pick up another child, cradling the boy to his chest. “Might as well be for a good reason.”

Slowly, the others begin doing the same, gathering the fallen, some searching for brothers, friends, others finding any they can carry. Emma follows Killian’s gaze to where two older kids come to the aid of a young boy trying to pick up a bigger body that bears him a painful resemblance - a brother no doubt. She doesn’t miss the way Killian watches them carry him across the beach, the younger boy not letting go of his brother’s sleeve. He’d lost his brother here as well, to Pan’s cruelty. She wonders how long ago it was, wonders if any amount of time matters. 

Emma follows Killian as he brings the tall boy’s body to the dinghy and sets him down gently. 

“So what now, Swan?” he says, turning to look at the Lost Boys gathering their fallen friends, “You’ve declared war on Pan. And these boys will follow you to the end now. Where will you lead them?” 

Emma spares another glance at the beach, at the pirates that were Lost Boys and the Lost Boys that will be pirates, all of them stolen from their lives and their families for Pan’s enjoyment. “Home. When this is over, and Pan is dead, we’re taking them home. All of them.”

“Aye,” he says, with an edge of something she can’t place in his voice, his gaze holding hers just a moment too long before he moves to collect another body, damp skin and drying shirt becoming stained with someone else’s blood. He hesitates, casting a glance back at her. “They aren’t the only ones who’ll follow you,” he tells her before turning and walking back towards the shore.

***

There are twice as many bodies on the deck as there had been last night, a sea of white cloth laid out on the bow of the Jolly like snowfall, twice as many ghosts wrapped in sheets waiting to be buried at sea. There are twice as many lost boys too, half of them no longer cowering by the edge of the ship’s rail, gazing longingly out at the island they’d just escaped. Instead they stand in rows, backs straight and heads bowed, already falling in line, already soldiers as they wait for their captain to speak. 

They’d sailed further from land than Emma’s been since they first arrived, the water deeper here, where no light can reach the depths even with the sun burning high and bright above them, and no shadows can be cast. “They’re weakest when the sun is at its peak, where the light can’t cast them further,” Wendy had explained. “At night though… at night the whole world is shadow.” 

Killian stands tense before them, Wendy and Will at his side, the two captains and their first mates. There’s something off in the line of his shoulders, in the way his thumb keeps sliding over the rings he wears. She’d seen him in the aftermath of the hunt, surrounded by the bodies, used to death and slaughter and cruelty. He’d held back then, composed and calm as always around the boys and young men that had survived. But as he looks at the sea of white, the cannonballs tied to their ankles that will drag them all down into the darkness where the shadows can’t reach them, she can see him losing that tenuous grip on his cool indifference. So can Wendy, if the hint of sympathy barely cracking through her own harsh disguise is anything to go on. 

When she thinks that he might not manage it, that his first mate might have to step in and take over, he lets out a bitter sigh. “Best not to draw it out.” Will steps forward, he and Killian lifting the closest body onto a plank balanced on the rail, held steady by two of the older crewmen - both barely out of their teens - preparing to tilt the body into the sea. 

Before he can raise his hand to signal the order, a small boy appears at his side, and Killian freezes. Emma hadn’t seen him break rank, hadn’t seen him make his way across the deck - no more than seven or eight years old.  She recognizes him, the one who’d been trying to carry his brother on the beach. She wonders what he could have possibly done for Pan to decide he’d had his fill of time in Neverland. 

The boy’s coat is tattered and dirty from however long he’d been in the jungle, and her reaches into it to pull something out, and then stretches as far as he can to reach across the body that’s nearly at eye level with him. And there, in the center of white sheet, he sets a baseball card down on the fallen boy’s chest. 

Emma doesn’t breath, the men holding the plank staring at the card, everyone on deck silent and frozen. The child moves to Killian’s side then, tugging at the thick leather of his sleeve until the captain leans down and gives the boy his attention. “Jack.” 

A strange sort of uncertainty falls over the crowd at the sound of the lost boy’s name. This is clearly not how things are done. Even the newest recruits shift uncomfortably - waiting. She watches the understanding settle in the line of Killian’s shoulders as he nods at the newest member of his crew. After a moment, one of the men who’d been holding the plank reaches out and tucks the card into the folds of the sail and then looks to his captain. Killian turns to the boy before nodding again.

“Jack,” he repeats, loud enough for everyone to hear.

There’s barely a splash as the body disappears beneath the surface, hardly a sound in that chilling stillness that Neverland possessed, but it resonates across the deck and Emma feels something shift. Wendy moves to help lift the next body onto the plank as Killian waits. A name is called from somewhere near the back, too quiet to place among the rows of former lost boys, but Killian repeats it as he had first one and there’s a moment of solemnness before another splash echoes across the deck. 

He names each of them -they all do - friends and brothers calling out to identify the fallen, to remember them before they’re laid to rest where Pan will never find them, where he’ll never hurt them again. 

***

“What do you think he’ll do?” 

Killian looks up at her standing in his doorway, shirt slipping over his head, catching on his hook. “Pan?” He sets to working the fabric free, hair windswept and sticking up at strange angles, skin still marked with the blood of the children he’d carried. 

Emma nods. He’d said there’d be consequences and she hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it since they’d gotten the last boy off the beach and onto the ship, his body wrapped in a sheet and sent to the depths with the others.

“I don’t know, but he won’t be happy.” 

She worries her lip between her teeth, casting a glance down the hall to the steps where overhead the boys are being introduced to their new life of piracy. “Darling makes ‘em spend days scrubbing the ship clean when they first come aboard. Says it ‘builds character’,” Will had explained. “Let it go already - it’s been nine years.” 

“Not having second thoughts, are you?” 

She shakes her head. She knows she did the right thing, that the children that died yesterday deserved some amount of dignity, of care, even in death, that those who lived deserved to see that they mattered, that they would be missed, that they wouldn’t be cast aside or forgotten. And that they wouldn’t be forced to be a tool in Pan’s neverending need for more playthings. 

“No, but I guess… I guess I didn’t consider that the consequences might not just be mine.” He could come for any of them. As far as Pan knows, she doesn’t exist. But Killian and Wendy, Will and everyone else on this ship could fall victim to Pan’s anger because of her. 

“Every person out there made a choice today, Swan. Something they haven’t been able to do in a very long time.” He finally gets the shirt free of his brace and lifts his gaze to hers. “Whatever consequences befall us now, the burden will be all of ours to bear. Not just yours.” He waits until she nods in agreement, then moves to dip his hand and hook into a basin, Emma watching as the water turns a murky red. “I will say though, Swan, I pity Pan for when he finally finds himself on the wrong side of your wrath. You’ve turned all of Neverland against him, even his own.”

“I think he did that himself when he tried to kill them.”

Killian shakes his head, grabbing a dampened cloth with his hook and scrubbing at the blood and sand dried to his hand. “The fact that they’d defy Pan and choose their fallen friends… the fact that half of them didn’t run for the treeline to beg him to take them back… You’ve changed something, love. You’ve done more for the creatures of this island in a week than any of us have managed in centuries.”

“I couldn’t just do nothing,” she mutters, crossing her arms and shrugging awkwardly. 

Killian gives a short, humourless laugh, avoiding her gaze, scrubbing harder as the cloth continues to slip from his hook. “Believe me, Swan, it’s very easy to do nothing.”

Emma takes a step into the room. “You didn’t do nothing.” 

“I didn’t do nearly as much as I could have.” 

“Stop it,” she scolds, crossing the space between them and taking the rag from him. He startles as she grabs his wrist, running the cloth over the blood caked into his palm. She knows her hair and clothes probably look just as bad - everyone out on the deck today carrying the stain of Pan’s cruelty on their skin. “You did what you could while staying alive. You can’t protect people if you’re dead. You can’t protect your crew, and you can’t protect the kids Pan sends your way if you’re dead.” He doesn’t have an answer to that. Good. 

They stand in silence as she finishes her task. When she can’t pretend to be cleaning the now non-existent blood anymore - the most stubborn bit finally wiped clean - when she can’t avoid saying what she came to say anymore, she sighs. “Thank you.” 

“For what?” 

“I know you could have just as easily made me leave them there on the beach - that it probably would have been the safer choice.” 

She rests the cloth in his open hand, focusing on it instead of him. She’s not great at this ‘thank you’ thing, at people understanding her the way he had on the shore today. 

“I don’t think anyone could make you do anything easily, Swan,” he teases and she shrugs, matching his hesitant smirk. “And it may have been the safe thing to do, but it wouldn’t have been the right thing.” His fingers curl around hers, keeping her there and drawing her attention back to him. “I should thank you as well.” 

“For what?” she echoes, frowning. She’s pretty sure she’s done nothing but cause problems for him since she got here. 

“For reminding me that I can still choose to do the right thing. I’d started to believe I’d forgotten how.” 

Her frown deepens. “Killian, you’ve done the right thing since -'' always, she wants to say, since she met him and made him bring her back here. He’s done right by her and her son and everyone else here from the beginning. 

“Since you chained me to that bloody sick bed,” he finishes, smirking again even as he shakes his head in disbelief, thumb is stroking across her knuckles - she doesn’t think he means to be doing it. “I don’t seem to have the option where you’re concerned. It’s exhausting, really.” Emma does her best not to laugh, not when he takes a step closer, fingers curling more purposefully around hers, the metal of his ring cool against her skin as he drops the cloth, eyes focused on hers like he’s trying to find an answer in them.  Voice soft, the teasing gone now he breathes, “you’re a bloody marvel, Swan,” and he’s so damn close now that she can feel his words warm against her cheek, can smell the salt and leather and rum that clings to his skin even after a day like today. 

He doesn’t move and she can’t decide if she wants him to, if the pounding of her heart stems from a desire to have him close the distance between them or from fear of what it would mean if he did. He’s watching her like he’s trying to decide the same and the words come out before she can stop them.

“Are you going to kiss me again?” 

His brow quirks up in amusement, before it shifts into that smug arch that’s become so familiar. “I believe you’re the one who’s initiated all of our previous dalliances, love,” he points out and she can feel her face going hot because he’s not wrong - she’s been throwing herself at him every chance she gets since that first kiss that was meant to distract him. “But aye,” he continues before the embarrassment gives her time to second guess herself. His hand lifts to her cheek, thumb tracing over her lip. “If you’ve no objections…” 

She should have some objections - like that making out with the really hot, annoyingly heroic pirate that makes her feel all kinds of confusing things she doesn’t want to be feeling is a really bad idea. But her head shakes without her permission and then he’s leaning in, carefully and agonizingly slowly until his lips only barely brush hers, the taste and heat of his mouth leaving her aching for the promise of more. She’d accuse him of teasing, only it doesn’t feel like a tease, more like a question as his lips catch hers gently, chaste and slow before pulling away and hesitating a moment longer. 

Emma’s fingers reach to tangle in his hair as she resists the urge to pull him to her like she has in the past. He lets out a small sigh at her touch and she can almost taste it before his mouth is on hers again, kiss slow and deep, swallowing the small sound she lets out when his brace slides low across her back to draw her closer. He kisses her like they’ve never done this before, every brush of his lips and stroke of his tongue and exploration and she’ll never get over how strongly her body reacts to him and the all-consuming way his mouth claims hers. 

She breathes his name and he lets out a low growl, hand tightening in her hair, pulling her closer, teeth dragging over her lip like he can catch the sound before soothing it with his tongue. He walks them back across the room to the door, pushing it shut, cradling her head against the impact as he presses her into the wood, mouth not leaving hers. She’s taken aback for a moment by the gentleness of his touch, but then his lips leave hers to trail the length of her neck and the shuddering heat that burns her everywhere his tongue meets her skin has her arching into him, need pooling low in her stomach. 

Emma lets out a small whimper when he follows the line of her shirt to the swell of her breasts and Killian groans, pulling away, forehead resting against hers as they both pant into the space between them. “I don’t have the energy to do everything I want to do to you tonight,” he sighs.

“How about just some of it?” she asks and he laughs, hand tracing the same path his mouth had, stopping at the center of her chest, over her heart, and sounding as frustrated as she feels - but also just as exhausted. Today had been a trying day, even by Neverland standards, and they’re both weary and still covered in blood and dirt and sweat from the exertion. 

“I know,” she agrees with a sigh, even if she doesn’t like it. Her hands slide from where they’d woven themselves into his hair to settle on his chest, his skin warm and soft against the coarse hair, heart beating hard under her palm. “Can I…” He waits, gaze focused on her even as she looks at the floor. She hates feeling vulnerable, but with everything that’s happened, with what Wendy told her about the shadows, and the now growing threat of an angry, vindictive Pan she just… “Can I stay?” 

They hadn’t talked about it in the morning, about Emma coming to his room the night before, the ship so loud with the cries of those broken children thrust into adulthood too young, into piracy against their will. She’d been gone before he woke, chasing phantoms across the deck and jumping off ships and they’d pretended as though it had never happened. And she’d been grateful for that. It made her feel brave enough to ask now, to admit that she needed this.

He seems surprised by her question before an expression of gentle understanding softens his features. “Aye, love,” he nods, reaching to brush her probably wild and matted hair from her eyes. “I’d like that.” The hitch of her heart calms when she realizes that maybe he also doesn’t want to be alone tonight, that maybe he needs the comfort and safety of another person after all the tragedy they’ve seen these last few days. 

He kisses her again, soft and gentle and easing some of the dread that’s made a home in her chest since she left Storybrooke. She thinks he meant it to be chaste, but neither of them seem in any hurry to give up the press of his mouth against hers, the reassuring comfort of his heartbeat, beneath her palm, or the warmth of his calloused fingers against her cheek, the metal of his hook, cool and grounding on her hip. 

She lets it go on longer than she should for a kiss like this, one that isn’t building to anything else, that isn’t meant to excite or seduce but just to feel and savour something good for once, something easy. It’s the way she’d kissed him by the water on Solstice. It had been dangerous then and it was dangerous now. 

Still, Killian is the one to pull away first, Emma chasing his lips without meaning to before he clears his throat, cheeks flushed and an expression she can’t place in his eyes as they meet hers, like the one he’d worn in the brig - perhaps I would - and suddenly it’s all so much more than it was supposed to be, than it can or should be. He must sense it too because he takes a step back, fog still not fully cleared from his gaze as he straightens. 

“I should go ensure the crew are prepared for the night - that there’s a watch planned.” She peels herself off the door so that he can get by. “There’s hot water in the pitcher if you want to wash the day off,” he adds, waiting for her nod, returning it, and then darting out of the room. 

Emma sags back against the closed door. What the hell are you doing? She can’t be doing… this. Whatever this is. Not here, certainly not now when she should be focused on her mission, on her son, not when the last time she came close to this was… Her fingers brush over the boot laces tied around her wrist. Look how well that had ended. Look how well it always ends. 

By the time Killian returns she’s washed her hair and the worst of the grime from her skin before slipping under the covers in a stolen, clean shirt. She feigns sleep when she hears him move almost silently around the room, there’s the splash of water and the rustle of clothing as she forces her eyes to remain shut. It’s not until she knows he’s standing by the bed, hesitating, like he’s not sure he should still join her now that she’s ‘asleep’ - as though she didn’t ask him if she could spend another night in his bed- that she breaks her pretense. 

“Just get in, Killian.” There’s a pause, a stillness in the air before she feels the sheets move and the bed sag beside her as he slides in, settling on his side next to her but leaving enough room that there’s no risk of them touching. And it’s a palpable distance. “Do you… do you want to sleep alone?” she asks quietly, anxious now that this isn’t one of his frustrating gentleman streaks but that he’s changed his mind, that she’s imposing, asking too much of him. 

“No,” his voice is just as low as hers and she holds back a small sigh of relief. 

“Please don’t make me ask…” Emma feels him calm beside her, the awkward tension leaving him as he inches closer. His fingers ghost over her shoulder for a moment before he slides his arm around her waist and pulls her back against him.

“I’m here, Swan. You don’t have to ask.” The promise is breathed into her hair, lips pressing to the crown of her head as they had the night before and Emma shuts her eyes against the tears that burn at the edges of them. “You’re safe,” he tells her again, like he knows she needs to hear it, and she nods. She knows. Even as the cries of the lost boys drift into the room from above deck and the jungle beyond, she knows. 

She turns in his arms, tucking her hands beneath her cheek so she can see him, follow the outline of his jaw and neck in the moonlight that steals through the drawn curtains. Even his silhouette is beautiful, the light playing over the edges of his skin, turning it almost iridescent, and making her want to reach out and trace the curve of his bare shoulder and arm where the shadows suggest shapes in the dark. 

“You are too, you know.” Killian might be one of the bravest people she’s ever met, but she knows that Pan terrifies him. And today he pissed him off - because she asked him to. “If Pan wants any of you he’s gonna have to go through me first.” Bold words as they hide beneath the covers like children hoping they won’t be found.

She doesn’t have to see his eyebrow tick up to know that it is. “Aye?”

“I’m scarier than I look.” He bites down on a laugh or a teasing comment. Her fingers found their way to his elbow at some point - she hadn’t meant to. They follow the line of his bicep, his shoulder. “I can keep you all safe.” Her voice nearly breaks on the last word - because she has to. Henry, Killian, Wendy, Will, she needs all of them to survive this. She’s lost everyone she’s cared about. She won’t add them to the list.

His finger is gentle beneath her chin as hers dance across his collarbone and she lifts her gaze to the pale blue that shines even in the dim light. “We’ll keep each other safe then,” he offers like a compromise and she nods. She can do that. 

She doesn’t have to ask if he’s going to kiss her this time, and she doesn’t care enough to be conflicted by the fact that she wants him to - not here in the dark where her doubts can’t find her. His hand slides over her cheek, fingers tracing the shell of her ear to curl around the nape of her neck, like he’s mapping his way to her by touch. When he draws her in she goes willingly, mouth meeting his like muscle memory, the heat and feel and taste of him a familiar temptation that she could find blind.

He hums low in the back of his throat when her lips part beneath his in invitation, taking the opportunity to deepen the kiss, tongue hot and slow against hers, using his hooked arm to pull her close, legs tangling beneath the sheets. She’s on goddamn fire as he continues to touch her with nothing but his hand in her hair, lips not straying from hers, and it’s not fucking fair because nobody should be able to push all of her buttons and make her want them so badly without even trying. And he’s not trying. This is just… how he is with her, how they are together and it’s maddening and intoxicating and she wonders if it’s always like this when you care. 

Fuck. The thought stops her. Fuck, she cares. She cares if he lives or dies - if something were to happen to him… If it happened because of her, she doesn’t -

“Are you alright, love?” The words are spoken against her lips. No, she’s absolutely not. But she’s not dealing with that right now. She doesn’t want to deal with how or why or when she ended up caring so fucking much, what it could do to her, like it’s done so many times before. She shakes her head, ignoring his question, both her arms wrapping around his neck to pull him back to her, mouth slanting over his in a silent sort of plea. He returns it, though his kiss is gentler than hers, softer and less urgent than it had been a moment ago and her heart and mind grow a bit less frantic. 

He changes the pace, slowing her, calming her, Emma sinking into the purposeful slide of his mouth and tongue and the tug of his fingers in her hair. He pulls away, their breath shallow and he finds her eyes in the dark again. The shadows don’t let her read his expression, but he must see something in hers because his hand slips from her hair, following the strands down her back to her waist where it flattens against her hip, slipping beneath the fabric of her stolen shirt. He moves so slowly, like he expects her to stop him, or he’s just giving her the chance to, but the heat of his palm trailing up her side is the most agonizing kind of torment and she bites hard on her lip to keep from begging as he inches across her skin.

When his hand finds her breast she lets him swallow the gasp that escapes her and the small curse she lets out when his thumb rolls over her nipple. She breathes his name when he continues to touch her, her nails digging into the back of his shoulders when he moves to nip and lick at the pulse point of her neck. He releases her only long enough to work the few buttons of her shirt open and then his mouth is on her breast and the room fills with her poorly silenced gasps and pleas as he teases her with teeth and tongue. 

She’s grateful when he kisses her again, just as his fingers trail over her stomach and dip between her legs, muffling the sound that would have alerted anyone still awake to exactly what was taking place in the dark of the cabin. His touch is fucking perfect, like he’d watched her in that fairy field where he talked her over the edge because ever stroke and curl and thrust is exactly what she likes, exactly what she needs and she knows it won’t take long. 

Killian falters when she reaches for him, fingers sliding into the soft, slippery fabric of his pants and finding him hard and straining in her hand. He bites out her name like a curse when she strokes him and he tries and fails to regain his composure. When her mouth claims his he groans into the kiss, his fingers matching the pace she sets with her hand on him and the roll of her hips. His thumb finds her clit and she bites his lip at the meticulousness of his touch, determined and fervid and she thinks he must be close too if he’s trying to send her over the edge so urgently.

Her free hand is vice-like in his hair, holding him to her as they whisper hushed gasps and curses into each other’s mouths and Emma has to turn her head into his shoulder, teeth sinking into his skin as she feels her climax building, hips rocking frantically as he brings her higher and higher. Her grip on his cock tightens, her strokes faster as she nears that edge. His words fall out in a choked mix of encouragement and pleasure, beard rough against her skin, breath hot on her neck, until she feels him tense against her. He groans a muffled ‘fuck, please, Swan,’ against her throat, fingers curling and urging and then she’s coming, back arching and her cry cut off by his mouth on hers before she feels him spill himself in her hand. 

“Fuck,” Killian curses, low and breathless in the stillness of the Neverland night. She doesn’t have any words, heart still racing and eyes still shut tight, her body feeling like it’s going to float away despite the heaviness in her limbs. She tugs his mouth back to hers with the grip she still has on his hair and the groan he lets out almost makes her feel bad, exhaustion and desperation and desire wrapped into one, low sound. 

He kisses her again, lips moving to her neck, her shoulder, her breast, and she’s about to warn him not to start something he can’t finish as the low hum of warmth settles over her skin, but then his fingers tug the edges of her shirt closed gently, pressing one last kiss to her mouth before standing and retrieving a cloth.

“Was that one of the things you had in mind?” she teases when she hands it back to him and he discards it. Her voice is still breathless and strained as he climbs back into the bed, sliding beneath the covers and taking her hand in his. She watches as he raises it to his lips, placing a kiss to the center of her palm and then weaving his fingers through hers. She tries not to let her heart grow frantic with the mix of fear and longing that surges when he lets their entwined hands rest in the bare space between them. 

“That was… wholly unexpected,” he rasps, thick with sleep and sex. She thinks his eyes are drifting shut, the strain of the day finally taking him even as his thumb strokes carefully over the back of hers, slower and slower as he’s pulled under. 

She watches him for a moment longer, making out the line of his brow and cheek in the dark, the steady rise and fall of his chest, more relaxed than she’s ever seen him. And as she pulls his hand to her mouth, lips settling against the cool metal of his rings, she knows exactly what he means. 

***

Emma wakes to a hand pressed firmly over her mouth, her eyes darting open in panic, muscles tensed, braced for a fight. But where she expects an intruder she finds only Killian, face close to hers, finger held to his lips, and she’d fucking deck him for scaring the shit out of her like this if it weren’t for the seriousness of his expression, the fear he just barely hides beneath the command. She knows that fear can only mean one thing, even before he whispers it into the darkness, eyes darting towards the ceiling, to the deck above them.

Pan.

******

Let me know if you'd like to be added or removed from my tag list!

@kmomof4 @elizabeethan @the-darkdragonfly  @undercaffinatednightmare @jennjenn615 @dramioneswan @gingerchangeling @gingerpolyglot @batana54 @lfh1226-linda @csalltheway @xsajx @xarandomdreamx @onceratheart18 @ownedbycaptainswan @teamhook @pirateprincessofpizza @lostintheskyfaraway @zaharadessert @thejollyroger-writer @ultraluckycatnd @justanother-unluckysoul @spartanguard @jonesfandomfanatic @deckerstarblanche @jrob64 @klynn-stormz @wefoundloveunderthelight @sailtoafarawayland @tiganasummertree @winterbaby89 @hollyethecurious @stahlop @superchocovian @snowbellewells @xellewoods @sals86 @karlyfr13s  @ouatpost @skairipakomtrikru @lonelyspectator12   @anmylica   @alexa-fangirl-forever @inspiredbystardust @marcella2727 @paradiselady19 @koryandr @killiansprincss @goforlaunchcee

[daniwib]

Hiiii 💕💕💕

For the fic never have I ever:

1) have you ever written anything about buddie and sleeping (like an insomnia fic, nightmares, cuddling and falling asleep, etc)?

2) have you ever written anything about buddie and chronic pain?

3.) have you ever written anything about buddie and hurt/comfort? What about angst?

4) have you ever written any sort of buddie AU?

-❤️🪐

Hey, hii!

(Me, holy shit, someone actually sent me an ask? Stay cool, stay cool, it’s cool everyone!)

(Also me, oh shit, I did not realise that this means I have to remember what I’ve written. Hmm. This may have been a mistake, I have the worst memory, I really do. Goes and checks out own ao3 profile for the answers…)

Ok here we go.

Nightmares. Oh hey look at that! I’ve actually got a fic with the word in its title, who knew! A spell for nightmares & fractured hearts is a short and fluffy lil fic about Buck helping Chris heal after the tsunami, and then Chris (and Eddie) helping Buck do the same. And because I’m allergic to fluff, I followed it up with part 2 in that series being long, whumpy and angsty. As for falling asleep, cuddling or insomnia, I can’t find anything in my quick search but I think I’ve written all of those in several of my fics, just not as a major part of the plot, more as part of the comfort part after the hurt usually.

Similar answer for chronic pain, I think? I’ve referenced it here and there in various fics but haven’t written on just about that. It’s a little bit too close to home for me, my dad has had 3 hip replacements (first because of major injury as a firefighter when I was 10, he fell through 3 floors in a burning building) so having lived with someone experiencing it, it doesn’t really appeal to me to write.

Buddie and hurt/comfort – um. Pretty much every single one of my Buddie fics?! I filtered my works with that tag and got 30 hits, so…. Here’s one I’m posting right now that I’m kinda proud of Pictures of You, in which Abuela dies post season 6, Eddie hurts and Buck comforts.

Buddie and angst – refer to above answer lol. If I had to choose a favourite, I think I’d choose empty, broken, lonely, hoping, my beloved presumed dead fic where Buck and Christopher are thought to have perished when Buck’s apartment building burns down and Eddie goes through several chapters of angst. It’s unrelenting really, poor guy. 4. Buddie AU – again, I’ve got several depending on your definition.

If you want a truly Alternate Universe, try I Once Was Lost. It’s a Peter Pan fusion where Buck is Peter, Eddie is Wendy Darling and almost all of the other characters feature in Neverland too. It covers from their childhood up until the end of season 5 and I have a particular soft spot in my heart for it.

If you prefer Canon Divergence, try There Walks Darkness. It’s basically What If Maddie didn’t kill Doug and he was arrested instead – and was one of the prisoners who took Buck and Eddie hostage in season 5? It features a lot of hurt Buck, Buck whump, worried Eddie and the 118, some of my favourite tropes to write.

And lastly, if you prefer supernatural AU, try Returned for a shorter read, which perhaps unsurprisingly is based on the movie and tv show… Returned.

Which reminds me of another supernatural AU that I can’t believe I forgot because I adore it! Trust Me, Darlin’ is my first collab, with the lovely @hella-cious! It's a Supernatural / 911 crossover in which Buck runs into an old hook up (Dean Winchester ofc) at a scene in LA and is promptly kidnapped before the 118’s eyes. Lots of angst and whump in this one and while there is Buck/Dean because lets face it, those two are far too hot not to ship together, it ends in Buddie (and Destiel too, for SPN fans!)

So, wow. There you go. This was a lot longer than I expected it to be but then I’ve never done one of these before. Thanks for being my first ask @steadfastsaturnsrings !!

[that-one-raccoon]

Goldy Pond au :)

Spoilers for The Promised Neverland Anime and Manga (especially the manga)!!!

So this is essentially a canon divergent AU where instead of Norman getting shipped off at the end of season 1, it's Emma. And the demons that were supposed to harvest her were actually working for Bayon and dropped her off at Goldy Pond.

(as its canon that there were demons who stole kids directly from the farms)

basically the premise is Emma adapting to live at Goldy Pond, whilst Ray and Norman deal with the Grace Field escape

This is in the very VERY early stages of drafting so I'm not comfortable with sharing any quotes or screenshots, though i may post concept art later....

[moonpool-system]

Fictive & other introject source list!

Partway for personal records and partway an invitation to ask us about source/fictive related things! Our system management can make sure no questions are directed at members uncomfortable with answering, so please feel free to engage respectfully regarding source stuff! 💙

While most of our introjects do identify as an iteration of their sourceselves and have the memories to match, please keep in mind that some things about us and our memories might be divergent or completely different from source, and consider that you might get an answer different from what you expect because of this.

Please remember that we don't agree with every single ideal expressed in every single one of these sources! Just because we have fictives from somewhere doesn't mean we're caught up on The Discourse™ or support every sketchy ideology connected to it. Thank you!

Sources marked with a ✨ are our sources most important to the system in some way!

Sources marked with a 🪶 are our sources most important in a different alterhuman context in some way!

And now, on to the list!

🎲 Game sources 🎮

[Game sources]

- Celeste ✨🪶

- Splatoon ✨

- Hollow Knight 🪶

- Cookie Run (Ovenbreak & kingdom) ✨🪶

- Kirby

- Danganronpa (All 3 main games) 🪶

- Persona (3 & 5) ✨🪶

- Genshin Impact (note we don't know ANYTHING about this source lmao)

- Pokémon

- Super Paper Mario

- Kingdom Hearts

- Hades

- Sonic the Hedgehog

- The Legend of Zelda ✨🪶

- Octopath Traveler

- FNaF: Security Breach

- Final Fantasy XV

- Solar Ash ✨🪶

- Star Wars: The Old Republic (Considered the same source in-system as regular SW)

- Omori

- Monster Camp

- Portal

- Warhammer (considered the same source in-system as ITEHTTS)

- Dungeons & Dragons

- Rain World 🪶

- Undertale/Deltarune (Considered nearly the same source in-system) 🪶

- Catherine: Full Body

- Slay the Princess ✨

- Cult of the Lamb

📺 TV, movies, animations, etc sources 📽️

[TV, movies, animations, etc sources]

- Red vs Blue

- Bungou Stray Dogs 🪶

- Inanimate Insanity

- South Park (we see a kid gettin treated badly and they get adopted. simple)

- Sk8 the Infinity

- Kanata no Astra (Astra: Lost in Space)

- Assassination Classroom

- Mai HiME

- The Promised Neverland (Season 1) (the rest in: books, comics, etc)

- Lucifer

- Steven Universe ✨🪶

- Our Flag Means Death

- The Good Place

- Moon Knight (series)

- Star Wars ✨

- Bee & Puppycat

- Kyou Kara Maou!

- Kung Fu Panda

- O.K. K.O.! Let's Be Heroes

- The Owl House

- Beyblade

- Inuyasha

- Puss in Boots

- If the Emperor had Text-To-Speech (ITEHTTS) (Considered the same source in-system as Warhammer)

- Lackadaisy (have yet to read the comics)

- Helluva Boss & Hazbin Hotel (Considered the same source in-system)

- Lego Monkie Kid (Sometimes seen as intertwined with Journey to the West source)

- Adventure Time / Fionna & Cake (Considered the same source in-system) 🪶

- The Amazing Digital Circus

- ENA

- Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

- Ben 10 (Gwen 10 AU)

- Gundam: The Witch From Mercury

📻 Podcast, songs, & theatre sources 🎤

[Podcast, songs, & theatre sources]

- Rabbits (podcast) 🪶

- REPO! The Genetic Opera

- Addict by Silva Hound

- Collared by Lily Vane

🌘 Mythological sources 📜

[Mythological sources]

- Journey to the West & related media

- Hellenistic mythology 🪶

- Chaos Magick collective deities 🪶

📚 Books, comics, etc sources 🔖

[Books, comics, etc sources]

- Warriors ✨

- The Promised Neverland (Season 1 also in: TV, movies, animations, etc. The rest by this source)

- Moon Knight (comics)

🌌 Original Sources 🌊

[Original Sources]

- [fill out info later]

[midnightita]

•~☆×*'oneshot/Headcanon'*×☆~• [English]

1. 🚫Topics I avoid🚫[maybe for now]

NSFW,lemons,obscenity,pedophilia,incest,sexual abuse

[maybe I'll add more in the future].

2. This is strictly a book x Reader

I've never done a Y/n male but I can try ^^

Feel free to make your request with all the info you want.

You can request other characters in the request, the limit is 3 :) [maybe for now]

And the format is up to you♡ (oneshot,Headcanon)

3. I could put one or more of my Ocs for oneshots ☆

4. All Headcanons and oneshots won't stick to the main story so as to avoid spoilers

5. I don't know when I'll update it might be random

also no hate pls :,>

I'm doing this for fun and to write some ideas,

now I'll leave you to my list below ;)

💃💃💃💃

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~• ~•~•~•~•~•~•~

1. Lupin III

2.Undertale(e Au)

3. Mha/Bnha

4. Super Mario

5. One Piece

6. Howl's Moving Castle

7. Dragon Ball

8. TMNT (the 2014 film)

9. Demon Slayer

10. Yandere Simulator

11. Dragon quest builders 2

12. Puss in boots 2 the last wish

13. Miraculous

14. Tloz Botw(The legend of zelda breath of the wild)

15. Creepypasta(maybe)

16. Kuroko no basket

17. Friday the 13th(I think I'll do Jason especially)

18. The Promised Neverland (I've only seen season 1 for now)

19. Lookism

20. Doraemon

21. Encanto

22. Turning Red

23. Sing 1/2

24. Too bad

25. Deltarune

26. Pokemon Spada

27. Fnaf security breach

28. Bendy and the ink machine or dark revival

29. If you wish also with my Ocs (I'll make a special book)

•~• ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~• ~•~•~ That's all for now I will add others if they come to mind in the catalogue. I tried my best to give you a big enough list here to choose from :,)

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

angust,fluff,romantic,yandere,other.

Oh my english isn't good at all so excuse me if it's not good :'D

I'm Italian :)

[ao3feed--bughead]

Finding Neverland

by Loveandcoffeeandothersimplicities

Betty Cooper, a whimsical and intelligent woman, goes through a whole ordeal when she's kidnapped by the Trash Bag Killer. Seven years on her own in Washington D.C., without her friends or family, and who does she turn to during her time of need the most? What does one Jughead Jones help her do to recover, and what happens when she's back with the Serpents, who had been more than family to her? Bughead AU based off *some* fifth season elements. (No cheating or B*rchie here, folks. Sorry).

Words: 2035, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Riverdale (TV 2017)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/M

Characters: Jughead Jones, Betty Cooper, Sweet Pea (Riverdale), Veronica Lodge, Archie Andrews, Alice Cooper (Archie Comics), FP Jones II, Cheryl Blossom, Kevin Keller, Toni Topaz, Fangs Fogarty

Relationships: Betty Cooper/Jughead Jones

Additional Tags: Kidnapping, tbk, Recovery, Injury, Injury Recovery, Friends to Lovers

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59141863

[novafire-is-thinking]

Thanks for the tag, @onewingedsparrow! I’m posting this separately since I am going to shamelessly turn this into a long music rec post that’s specific to the TF fandom and to me.

Rules: Share 10 songs you like and tag 10 people

Note: All the links are for YouTube.

Tales of Neverland by J.T. Peterson

Sparrow, this one’s for you. It’s one of the songs that makes me think of you. :)

A True Master by Yi Nantiro

I’ll be putting this lovely instrumental in my playlist for Wing (IDW).

We Used To Talk For Hours by Soulero

A personal favorite that’s currently sitting in my unfinished IDW/MTMTE Rewind playlist.

A Tale of Sea Dragons by Marcus Warner

This instrumental takes me places. Beautiful places.

Oklo by Alpine Universe

This one makes me think of IDW Ravage (and my TFP AU Ravage). If I ever drew him, this is the song I’d play in the background.

What A Wonderful World by 2WEI, Ali Christenhusz, & Edda Hayes

Some may tire of me saying this, but irony is like catnip for me. I think of EarthSpark Tarantulas every time I hear this dark version of the song.

Nobody Knows by The Lumineers

One of only three songs I’ve found so far that makes me think of Ratchet from IDW, specifically in MTMTE #40.

Firefly by Lindsey Stirling

I wasn’t even a third of the way through Rescue Bots Academy Season 1 before I remembered this song and went, “This is so Whirl.” Too bad it’s not on Spotify.

Places I’ll Go by Blonde Maze & Half an Orange

Just a personal favorite I’ve been enjoying recently.

The Game Has Changed by Daft Punk

I watched TRON: Legacy for the first time last week. The visuals and the music are impeccable. I’m not a huge Daft Punk fan, but I love what they did for the film soundtrack. This particular song is the newest addition to my TFP Soundwave playlist. With a color change of two, he’d fit right in if he were dropped into the cyberworld of Tron.

Tagging @karlyanalora and @sphnyspinspin since I think you two in particular will find at least one song here to be of interest. ;)

Now for the other 8: @jl1970 @benadrylcandlewhack @transformersloversworld @stillbelievinginfireflies @acruxwave @starscreamboyfriend @dramamelon @ratch-gadget

There’s no need to go into as much detail as I did. I just can’t resist an opportunity to share the ‘why’ behind songs I find and love. ♡

[myeyesandheartadjust]

Intro Post

Hi!!! You can call me Lanny, though if you want to give me a cute nickname. I'll happily take that too.

As the title of my page says it's a beautiful mess here. You never know what you'll find here. You may:

find me screaming about whatever fandom I'm currently hyperfixated on

find rant posts or rant poems (probably will be rare)

find me reblogging whatever interests me especially things I'm passionate about

screaming or reblog about people's rights. [I firmly believe all people are important and deserve equal rights whether they are POC, queer, disabled, or anything]

Reblog chains or whatever as I enjoy the family I was adopted into and the group I fell into

About Me <3 <3

Queer (Labels are confusing and I can't find a clear label to describe how I like but I'm attracted both genders)

Currently questioning my gender identity and would love it if you used They/Them pronouns and gender neutral terms

I love talking to people and making new friends

I love answering asks so send me asks!!! Or use whatever ask games I decide to post.

Recently figured out I might be Nero-divergent

Am disabled (If you wanna check out my new blog I'm starting about my life with a whole lotta disabilities click here)

I love dragons and have an imagery pet dragon named Jurgen

Current Hyperfixation (Will Keep Editted)

Epic the Musical

The Magnus Archives/ The Magnus Protocol

Favorite Fandoms (Will Keep Updated)

The Two Princes Podcast

Epic the Musical

Our Flag Means Death

Heartstopper (Show)

36 Questions

Case 63

The Bright Sessions.

Me and Au

The Magnus Archives/ The Magnus Protocol

Supernatural (even though I've only seen half of season 1)

The Promised Neverland

Blood of Zeus

In This House This Is A Safe Space!!

All people who are POC, identify as anything in the LGBTQIA+ community, are neuro-divergent, are disabled or are systems/ age regressors, this is a safe space for you!!!

Terfs, homophobes and those who are ableist DNI

My Life's Mottos

"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or a saw a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars until everyone stops and says Aww!!"

Jack Kerouac

On The Road

"Have courage and be kind."

Cinderella (2015)

"I wanna live not just survive."

Angel With A Shotgun

The Cab

[allforafro]

something like a table of contents to make searching easier or a guide to my thoughts

see below as the list is quite long and I don't like long posts on my desktop

theory:

boku no hero academia:

traitor theory (polish)

about spoiler for 336 leaks (polish)

bnha 342 spoiler

bnha 334, this afo is a clone theory

ikamigami theory about overhaul (not mine)

is one for all is evil?

to the rescue of the villains of lov

about theory afo is a glowing baby

my anti dfo post:

anti dfo post 1

100 post, anti dfo post 2

bnha other:

dabi origin story

afo name

kamino afo supremacy

sometimes I get tired of Caleb and his team translating

who is gay in bnha poll

afo doesn't smoke

afo loves yoichi bnha 407

jujutsu kaisen:

about this special video about gojo in the prison realm

sugusato headcanon, husband au

complaining to people about their perception of maki

appreciate nanami kento

jujutsu kaisen theory:

theory and prediction

jjk 236

geto won't come back

Heroes:

loose thought regarding ep8 s1

season 1 and 2 opinion

season 3 live reaction (ep. 1-6)

season 3 live raction (ep.7-9)

season 3 live reaction (ep. 14 - 25)

yakusoku no neverland

review of The promised neverland

shameless advertising

moon knight:

Moon knight review

miraculous ladybug

my few thoughts about Zoe

darkwing duck

darkwing duck reciew

reblog:

my 2 cents about toga

I love ikamigami take on bnha

goncharov quiz

doctor loves afo

complaining to people about thei perception of maki part 2

lmk sun wukong character analysis (love this!)

about shadowpeach apology

petrelli brothers as a twin

great post about SWK defending

what effect could laughing gas have had on jeremiah

sylar plus Catholic symbolism

my fanfiction:

boku no hero academia:

sparklers

heroes:

soulmate is not always the one that fate has chosen for us

Last friday night

roadside assistance

another day, another tragedy , chap.4, chap.5

[woodelf68]

MY FIC: RUMBELLE/OUAT, RUSHBELLE, MACELLE, SGU

Posting this because I've been having trouble editing my blog page fic masterlists for the last couple of years, so I'm going to have the blog page just link to this post; it's quicker to update a text post with a new fic vs. going into blog settings anyway.

Rumbelle:

Midnight Confessions — Rumbelle fluff diverging from The Crocodile.

Home — Post-Neverland Rumbelle reunion sex.

To Wash All Cares Away — Rumbelle shower sex. Sequel to Home.   Extra scene

Not Beyond Repair — Rumbelle, set after ‘Witch Hunt’. Belle is trapped in the cage with Rumpel. 

In The Dark – sequel to Not Beyond Repair. (new!)

Generations — Henry/Gold bonding at Neal’s grave. Angst/fluff mix.

Hot and Cold —Rumbelle smut. A warm summer day and a cold frozen treat. 

Simmer — Belle’s got a new string bikini. Rumpel approves. Smut.

Addendum — An extended version of the deleted scene between Henry and Rumpeltiltkin from 4x02.

Dark Lover — Belle confesses a fantasy. Rumbelle smut

In Which Rumpelstiltskin Receives Help From An Unexpected Source — The Rumbelle Deer comes to Rumpel’s aid when Belle forces him across the town line. Because there’s nothing like adding a little crack to canon. Based on the ending of 4x11.

Some Other Floof of July – a sequel to junoinferno’s “Some Other Kiss Me”, Rumpel and Belle see a glimpse of themselves in another reality in a crystal ball. Post season 4 fic. 

Spinning – Short season 1 AU fluff.

Brother – Neal might be gone, but he isn’t forgotten. Future Rumbaby fic.

Girls on Film – Photographer!Gold and first-time model!Belle. Rated T

A Fresh Start  – Gold needs to turn his aging inn back into a successful enterprise if he wants to help send Bae to college. Their part-time maid Belle is full of ideas and an unexpected surprise. 

Reflections –  Mirror sex prompt

Poppet – Voodoo doll smut prompt

The Things We Do For Love  – Rumpel decides to surprise Belle with an idea from her book on how to spice up one’s love life. Rated T for chapter one  and E for Chapter Two here

Just a Dream – Fix-it fic for 6A. 

Higher – Rumbaby fluff. “Push me higher, Mommy!”

Wedding Dance – Gideon’s grown up.

The Lesson – Showjumper!Belle and coach!Gold at the Olympics. 

The Way Forward – Henry takes adult!Gideon under his wing, and Rumbelle contemplate the future. (canon compliant until the season 6 finale)

Best Beloveds – Young Gideon’s having a bad day. His Papa makes it better. 

Prompt: Gideon Loves Trains

Prompt: Baby Gideon gets dressed up

Spinner – Pony!Rumbelle + human!Rumbelle, all in one fic! 

A Life Worth Living – Fix-it for 7x04, Beauty. Fills in some of the spaces during Gideon’s first ten years. (TEA winner, best travel fic 2019)

Bright Shining Star – It’s Henry’s birthday. Rumpel makes sure that those who cannot be there are not forgotten. 

The Fire Down Below – Spilled lust potion, Dark Castle smut. 

Turn On, Tune In, Drop Out - Gold and Belle roleplay as hippies (For some reason this will not link; just search the title on my blog to find it!)

The Spirit Of The Trees – Tree spirit!Rum is awakened by Belle

Tales from the Rumbelle Floofy!verse: In which silliness may occur, Rumpel is the best Grandpa ever, and Neal survives. 

Bargain — Henry wants a birthday present for Emma. Gold has just the thing, and a special price for his youngest and cutest customer. 

Everyone Needs A Hobby —  Rumpelstiltskin really doesn’t like fairies. And they press so beautifully.

Whatever It Takes — All they want is one uninterrupted date.

Manhattan Redux — an alternate scene between Gold and Henry in New York. Gold’s dying, but Henry refuses to let him give up. 

Family — How things could have gone in Neverland. Rumpel doesn’t let being squid-inked stop him from rescuing Henry.

Hello, Deerie — Christmas-themed Rumbelle and Floof Family Fluff

To Rise Again — Rumbelle/Nealfire AU. What if Belle had grabbed the dagger instead of Zelena at the Dark Vault? Could Neal have been saved?

The Floof of July — The Floof Family celebrates the Fourth of July in the Gold’s backyard. Part of my ‘verse in which Neal survived.. 

What The Storm Brought — It was a dark and stormy night. Henry discovers what it left behind.

The Storybrooke Ice Bucket Challenge — Henry’s nominated his grandfathers. Rumpel’s clever enough to see where it could lead.

A Difficulty With Dragons — Rumpelstiltskin won’t let a magical mishap stop him from attending Henry’s school awards ceremony. 

Like Father, Like Son — A taste for a certain checked shirt seems to be run in the family. Neal/Henry scene.

Cookies — Family times in the Gold’s kitchen.

Operation: Wolfpack (chapter one) – Henry thinks his parents might just need a helping hand to get them back together. He takes himself out of the way by spending the night at the Gold’s house. 

Operation: Wolfpack (chapter two) – Henry spots a couple of familiar faces at the animal shelter. Can he convince his grandparents to adopt not just one but two dogs? And Emma and Neal have news to share. 

Trick or Treat – Halloween time at the Gold household with Henry and Neal and a surprise announcement from Belle.

Hunt For The Green Unicorn – The Storybrooke Summer Arts and Crafts Festival and some horned friends becomes part of the Gold family tradition. 

 Accidental Magic – Future fic. 5 year-old Jenny Gold gets her birthday wish.  2020 TEA winner for best OC Rumbelle child. 

RUSHBELLE AND MACELLE:

Consequences — Rushbelle smut

The Saga of Fluffy the Space Unicorn — Rushbelle fluff. Just another day on a  new planet.

An Unusual Development — Rushbelle, a little bit crack, a little bit angst. Something is growing out of the center of Rush’s forehead. In other words, unicorn!Rush.  CHAPTER TWO

Of Heather Beer and Rubber Duckies – Rushbelle fluff. Belle has a little too much to drink. 

Fantasy, With Tongue – Rushbelle smut. Rush wants to hear Belle’s kinkiest fantasy.

The Cave – Rushbelle smut. Rush finds a hidden sea cave when exploring a planet. He invites Belle to come see. 

He Creeps Into Dreams — inspired by Bad Faery’s 'And Again'.  Belle dreams of her late husband Nick. Or is it just a dream? (NTIC*/pre-Macelle) (*Nick the Incorporeal Creeper, introduced in 'And Again', aka the Nicholas Rush who was forced to Ascend but who took on a life of his own outside the fic helpfully nudging single Belles towards a Bobby character who can make them happy.)

At His Service — Inspired by Bad Faery’s 'And Again'.  More blowjobs for Joseph.(Macelle)

SGU:

Prelude – Nick and Gloria Rush’s first morning together as a married couple. (SGU)

Not What It Appears – Rush and Young are trapped in someone’s dream. Naked. Will they do what it takes to get the dream to end? NC-17 (SGU)

[donteattheappleshook]

Not Broken At All Chapter 17/?

Summary:

A season 1 Neverland AU. Emma is still trying to adjust to her new life as Sheriff of Storybrooke and mom to Henry, who still believes everyone in town is a fairytale creature. When she finds a badly beaten, one handed man while patrolling, she’s convinced he’s crazy. He is, after all, rambling about fairies and shadows and crocodiles. But when Henry is suddenly taken out the window of a house everyone believes is haunted, the madman in the hospital might be her only hope of getting her son back. Whether he likes it or not.

Rated E

Catch up on Ao3 (where my italics work) or on Tumblr 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

Thank you thank you thank you @the-darkdragonfly for helping me so much with this chapter I literally wrote at your kitchen table lol.

This one is a bit shorter because I had to move the last scene to the next chapter or it would have been like 10k long…. but hopefully that means chapter 18 is coming soon!

(at least you didn't have to wait a year for chapter 17?)

*******

Part 17

Emma follows Killian’s eyes as they dart towards the ceiling, the deck above their heads. It’s dark out, but not the dark of night, the dark of an oncoming storm, that ominous, looming chill of electricity in the air, the waves lapping against the sides of the ship that rocks unsteadily against the threatening sea. A shiver runs down her spine. Whether Pan’s here or not - he’s fucking furious. 

There’s a knock on the door, Wendy not waiting for permission before pushing it open. “Is he here?” Killian asks, voice low. 

She shakes her head, holding a small, empty vial. “Not yet. But Ianeira sent a warning - he’s on his way and he’s not happy.” She looks out at the first heavy drops that land against the window like bullets. “Obviously.” 

“Get the boys below deck,” he orders, still not raising his voice above the rumble of the storm outside. “Scarlet,” he adds, the younger pirate leaning against the doorframe, “go wake the crew. Tell them to be ready for a fight.” 

“What are you going to do?” Wendy frowns like she already knows the answer. 

“Handle Pan.” 

“Absolutely not.” Emma answers at the same time as Wendy’s “like hell” rings through the air. “This was my idea. I’ll go deal with the consequences,” she insists, but her words are ignored as the two captains continue to argue. Will shoots her a sympathetic shrug from his place in the doorway. 

“We don’t have time to argue,” Killian finally snaps at his second, standing and grabbing Emma’s pants from where she hung them last night before tossing them to her. “Pan and his Lost Boys will be here any minute and we need to make sure the boys are hidden and the crew is ready to defend the Jolly.” 

“Is that an order, Captain?” Wendy asks, arms crossing over her chest and Killian stiffens. Emma didn’t miss the weight put behind the question.

“Cap-” he starts but she cuts him off.

“No. No more of this ‘I’m not the captain’ or two captains bullshit. If you’re going to pull rank and make me follow orders then you don’t get to decide you don’t want to be in charge anymore tomorrow. If this crew is going to put our lives on the line for your plan, and trust you to handle Pan, then you’re going to be the one to make the order. And if you die today -” Her harsh facade breaks just a fraction - “It won’t be because of something I could have stopped.” 

The room is silent as the two stare each other down, the rush and howls of the storm growing louder outside, growing closer as they remain locked in the standoff, Wendy’s ultimatum hanging between them. “Well?” she demands. 

He’s silent for another moment, but then he lets out a sigh. “Bring the boys below deck, make sure they don’t make a sound or Pan will remember that they’re here.” Another hesitation as neither she or Will move and his thumb runs over the ring on his finger. “That’s an order.” 

Wendy’s shoulders both straighten and sag at once as she shifts into her new role, her face blank, betraying nothing, but Emma knows. She can see the hurt and the fear, of his betrayal and of the danger he’s putting himself in as she nods. “Aye, Captain.” 

Killian flinches away from the title just the barest amount before she heads out of the room. 

“What are you gonna tell him?” Will glares at his usurping captain. 

Killian sighs. “I haven’t figured that part out yet.” He reaches for his shirt, pulling it on over his head and turning to find the man still there. “Go wake the crew,” he orders again and Will stares at him for a long moment before doing as he’s told. 

Emma watches him as he dresses, yanking her own pants on and rising from the bed, the buttons of his vest fastened methodically, one by one with practiced fingers before he dons his greatcoat. She realizes what she’s watching as he slides his sword into its sheath, secures it to his hip: a soldier dressing for battle, each piece of his armour clad carefully down to the expression he smooths over his face, the one that hides the man who’d let her in his bed and held her against the threat of the night behind a cold, heartless facade.

“Killian,” she starts, ready to fight him on this. Rescuing the boys was her decision. She’d made them do it. This should be her responsibility. Nobody else's lives should be on the line for her choices. A boom of thunder cuts her off before a flash of lightning brightens the room.

“He’s here,” Wendy tells them, stepping back into the room. Killian doesn’t confirm if his orders have been followed - he doesn’t need to. 

“Let me go,” Emma insists. “I can tell him it was my idea. I can -” 

“No.” They answer in unison and before she can protest a boom of thunder echoes above them and an angry, lilting voice calls out above them. 

“Thieves! Show yourselves!” The demand is followed by a roar of approval, small, young voices calling out in a battle cry she’s heard before. The room goes silent, tension in every line of her body and Killian’s. Wendy looks to her captain, waiting for orders, hands fisted like she’s trying not to barge up there herself. 

Emma sees the barest flash of fear in his gaze before he schools it and turns to her, leveling her with a hard, commanding look. 

“Go to the hold with the children. Promise me you’ll stay down there - that you won’t make a sound.” Emma glares at him, his face only inches away as he speaks so quietly she can barely hear him. He glares back just as defiantly. “Promise me, Swan.” She doesn’t answer. She’s not promising that. Not when it’s her fault Pan’s here and he could hurt them. “They need you. They trust you and they need to stay hidden. If Pan’s reminded they’re here… he might demand their lives in place of the dead we took.” 

Her glare deepens. “I know what you’re doing.” 

The corner of his mouth turns up just a fraction before he straightens it. “Then you should have no problem following through with it.” When her shoulders straighten his hand comes to her cheek. “We can’t risk Pan finding out about you - not while we don’t have a way of defeating him or saving Henry. You can’t protect anyone if you’re dead,” he adds, using her words against her now and her eyes narrow. “You can’t protect Henry if you’re dead.” That one hits hard and Emma knows he’s right - but she still doesn’t like it. She doesn’t want him dead either. 

Pan’s warning rings out again, harsher this time - ‘Come out and face me, coward!’ - and Killian’s shoulders tense. “Fine,” she concedes. “But if things go bad -”

“You’ll stay right here.” It’s a warning, and she almost wants to call him on it, to see what he really thinks he can do to her that’s worse than the situation they’re already in, but she bites her tongue. He takes her silence as the end of the discussion. “Darling,” he calls over his shoulder. “Bring her to the hold and then join me on deck - Darling,” he tries again when she doesn’t respond, but Wendy’s attention is focused outside the cabin, staring out down the hall, a frown starting to pull at her brow and Killian’s matches it. “Wendy?”

“Where’s Will?” 

“What?” 

“Will.” Her voice is low, far away but rising with tightly restrained panic. “He should be back by now. Where’s the crew?” 

As if on cue, a voice rings out loudly above them. “Pan! Two visits in as many days? To what do we owe the honour?” They rush to the stairs, crouched low looking out at where Will stands, alone, facing off against Pan. Fuck. Please don’t be an idiot. She can feel Wendy tense beside her and Killian reaches, grabbing his first mate’s arm. 

“Don’t,” he warns and Emma’s surprised to see her try to yank her arm free. But he holds firm. 

“Scarlet.” Pan sounds annoyed but intrigued nevertheless. “It’s been a long time.” He cocks his head, a small smirk on his childlike face. “You got old.”  

 “Go get the crew,” Killian orders, staring her down and not releasing her until the fight fades slightly from her eyes. He knows how much this must be killing her. “If there’s going to be a fight, we won’t be able to stop him alone. Bring them with you and meet me on deck.” 

Will baulks. “How dare you! I’ll have you know I’ve the complexion of a man less than half my age.” He brushes a hand over his scruffless cheek as if to prove it.

There’s still resistance in Wendy’s stance but she nods, dashing off towards the crew’s quarters. Killian turns to her. “Stay here. Don’t let the children leave the hull.” She can only nod, still watching as her new friend continues to bait Pan. “Bloody idiot,” Killian mutters under his breath.

Emma grabs his arm, halting him. She waits until his questioning gaze turns to her. “Be careful. Please.”

He watches her for a moment, eyes darting up to the deck, and then takes her hand, presses a kiss to the back of it and nods the voices above growing louder. He spares her one last glance before dashing up the stairs.

“Hook,” Pan says as soon as he reaches the bow of the ship. “There you are. I don’t like to be kept waiting.” 

“Apologies,” Killian offers with a small bow and a polite smile. “To what do we owe the pleasure?” 

“Where are my shadows?” 

“Your shadows? We don’t have any shadows here.” 

“Don’t lie,” Pan snaps and Emma flinches. “You stole eleven lost boys from me. Those were my lives - I won them fair and square. Give them back.” Emma half expects him to stomp his foot, but it’s then that she realizes that he can’t - because he’s not on the deck. He’s flying, or hovering a few feet above it. Wendy had said that Neverland’s magic couldn’t touch the Jolly - does that mean Pan can’t either? Can he not set foot onboard?

“They’re at the bottom of the sea, I’m afraid,” Killian tells him with a wince and she can see the rage building in the small boy.  

“Then I’ll take them from your crew. Eleven of them in exchange for the ones that you took.” Emma casts a glance back down the hall towards the hold where a dozen children hide. 

“No need for that,” Killian begins. “They aren’t to blame for this little misunderstanding. I’m sure we can find a solution where you get what you want that’s fair.” Pan hesitates at the word fair. He loves his games - he loves his rules. 

“Then who is to blame?” he demands. “Bring the thief forward so that he can be punished.”

“Unfortunately we-”

“I did it.” 

“Scarlet,” Wendy hisses in warning, but he’s already taking another step towards Pan. 

“It was my idea.” 

Pan glares. “Why?” 

There’s a pause and then Will smirks. “I just wanted to piss you off. For old time’s sake.” 

The boy’s anger shifts into something cruel and amused. “Well then, you can pay the price for old times sake. You remember how much fun my punishments can be,” he adds. She sees Will’s back go stiff right before Pan’s hand plunges deep into his chest and Emma has to cover her mouth with her hands to catch the scream that tries to escape. The crew stills, petrified. This isn’t the first time they’ve seen this happen.

“Wait!” Wendy shouts as Will lets out a groan of pain. Killian grabs her arm, silencing her and holding her in place. Pan ignores her, pulling his hand free, something bright and red and glowing held in his palm. That can’t be what she thinks it is. 

“Eleven lives,” he muses again, floating easily across the deck, thinking. He gives the thing a small squeeze and Will cries out falling to his knees. Pan smirks, he’s enjoying this, she can tell; he already knows what he wants to do and Emma’s nails dig into her palms, every bone in her body demanding she go up there and not let this happen. It should be her that pays the price. Not Will. 

His fingers tighten around it again and Will stops breathing, hand clutched to his chest where his heart should be until finally, Pan loosens his grip, looking at Will with his head cocked again. “You really did get old, Scarlet. But maybe not old enough…” He looks him over carefully, then the mass in his hand. “Eleven Lost Boy’s lives… so many years - But I think we can make it an even hundred. For old times sake?” he smirks. “That sounds fair,” he decides. “You can pay me back a hundred years.” 

When he squeezes the heart again, Will collapses onto the deck, bits of dust slipping from Pan’s fingers as the light flickers in and out and Emma can see Killian physically holding Wendy back now, knuckles white around the leather of her coat. Nobody breathes. The crew look like it’s taking everything they have not to run - either to Will or away from Pan. Instead they stand frozen. 

She counts the seconds as they go by. One. Two. Three. Four. Five… Will rasps out a strangled cry, fists balling against the wood planks of the deck. Six. Seven. Eight… She watches him grit his teeth, sweat beading along the back of his neck, fighting. Nine. Ten. Eleven…

When she reaches eleven, Will takes his first breath in what feels like hours, the light in Pan’s loosened grip smaller and dimmer but still glowing, still beating. 

“That should do it,” he smiles, returning Will’s heart to his chest.

Will gasps, settling his hand over it as if to feel the beat under it - make sure it’s really there. Then he frowns up at the boy. “Is… is that it?” 

“Scarlet.” It’s Killian who snaps this time. “Below deck. Now.” Emma can’t see the look Wendy gives him when Will defers to her, but it sends him to his feet and across the deck in a second, head bent low. 

“Emma,” he greets with all his usual bravado despite the raspiness of his breath when he finds her on the stairs. “Fancy seeing you here.” 

She punches him in the arm. Hard.  “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Ow!” 

“That was so stupid! What the hell were you thinking?” 

Will shrugs. “I owed him one. And I’m not going to let Killian get one up on the galant gestures.” 

“Hook.” Pan says, drawing her attention away before she can hit Will again. “If your crew isn’t going to play fair then they won’t get to play with us anymore”

“I’ll get them in line,” he promises and she can hear the edge in his voice. 

“Good. Do you need a reminder of the rules? You were away for a long time…”

“I remember.” 

Pan nods, happy now - a child getting his way. “Good. Then the game can continue.” He turns, hovering over the railing of the ship and casting them one last glance as the threat of a storm begins to clear. “But no more chances,” he warns. Both Killian and Wendy nod solemnly before he flies off towards the beach. 

As soon as he’s gone, Wendy practically runs towards the cabin. “All of you,” Killian commands, drawing the crew’s attention away from their former captain. “Back to work. Now,” he snaps when they don’t obey immediately. They scatter, finding work to keep them busy. 

Emma has to jump out of the way as the other woman barrels down the stairs, grabbing Will by the shoulders. She turns him one way and then another, hands coming to his face as she does the same to his head, checking for injuries. Finally, her hand settles on his chest and Emma can tell she’s counting heartbeats. Will lets her, not resisting as she checks him for any sign of permanent damage. 

When she seems satisfied, she raises furious eyes to his, the hand at his chest fisting in his shirt and shoving him away from her. “Fuck you, Scarlet,” she bites out before storming off down the hall. 

Killian takes over, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. Will is less willing to let himself be manhandled by him though, shoving at his arm even as he holds firm. “Do you not know how to follow an order, mate?” 

“I’m not your mate,” he snaps back, more annoyed than angry. “And you’re not my Captain.” 

“And here I thought we were getting along,” Killian answers sarcastically. “And you don’t have to like it, but I am your Captain and if you do that to her again -”

“Like you did when you took off to find Henry?” 

“That was different. I did it to spare her the pain of losing someone she cares for.” 

“So did I. Do you really think Pan would have been so forgiving if you’d taken the blame? You’ve been gone a long time, Hook. You’re not his favourite playmate anymore.” 

“And you are?”

“I’m still alive aren’t I?” 

Killian scoffs. “You’ve lasted a decade. Speak to me when you survive a century.” 

“Well if we keep her alive we won’t have to,” Will snarks, nodding at Emma. 

“Me?”

“I wouldn’t have stuck my neck out for you if I didn’t think you were actually going to change things.” Emma doesn’t have an answer to that, the weight of his faith in her more than she can handle right now. “Don’t make me regret it, aye?” he winces, rubbing at his chest.

“What did he do to you?”

He gives a small shrug. “Crushed my heart. Wasn’t so bad, really - I’ve had worse.” 

“What?” 

“It’s a particular favourite of his,” Killian explains. 

“I’ve seen him do it to disobedient Lost Boys for hours - days once. He’s done it longer to me when I was his second. I’m surprised it was only…”

“Eleven seconds,” Emma supplies. The longest eleven seconds she can remember.

“Aye - I thought he’d be angrier.” 

“What did he mean by you paying him back a hundred years?” 

Will shrugs again. “Pan loves his riddles. I’m sure we’ll find out soon enough. I need to go find Wendy.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Killian warns and it almost sounds like a threat. 

Will scoffs, finally shoving his hand away. “Please. I’ve done stupider things than egg Pan on.”

“That doesn’t surprise me,” Killian rolls his eyes and Will glares at him before smirking.

“I’ve become very good at getting her to forgive me.” 

Emma wonders for a moment if she’s going to have to prevent a murder. “Get out of here before I get Pan to come back and crush your heart for good.” 

“What? I thought we were mates -”

“Go,” Emma tells him. Before Killian follows through on that promise. Thankfully, Will isn’t stupid enough to push him any further and does as he’s told. She puts a hand on Killian’s arm. “Just remember that he almost died today. Cut him a bit of slack.” He doesn’t seem convinced, continuing to glare after the younger man. “And he might have saved our lives. He definitely saved mine.” 

Killian scoffs, finally looking at her. “And he’ll never let us forget it.”

“So what’s next?” she asks, trying to distract him from his sort of daughter and her sort of boyfriend’s sort of love life. 

“Hmm?”

“We’ve got the lorelei, we’ve got Tinkerbell, we’ve got a ship full of Lost Boys and pirates, we kept him from getting any more shadows… what do we do now?”

“We figure out what Pan’s plan is.”

“Can we not just… kill him?” she knows they can’t - probably - but she’s pretty sure the idea hasn’t been thrown out there yet so it’s worth a shot. 

Killian shakes his head like she expected him to. “If we could, I’d have done it by now. I did once, when I first returned to Neverland after decades away. I ran him through with my sword trying to avenge my brother.” Her hand on his arm tightens without her meaning it to. “He pretended, made a whole show and lay there until I was sure he was dead - and then he started to laugh. Just another game - the first one I played with him even if I didn’t know it. He told me it was the only time he would let me win.”

“We’ll find a way.” 

He smiles at her, small and half-hearted but she believes him. “I’m sure you will.”

***

“Why do we have to do this?” one of the boys - Kyle, she thinks - complains, dropping the wooden sword to his side. It had been so strange and jarring to learn some of the Lost Boys names over the last few days. “ We have nothing to do but wait ,” Killian had said. “Tink has let the Constant know that we’re ready to meet with them and they’ll send word when they’ve decided if they’ll hear us out .” For some reason, the boys had all been like Wendy in her mind, born ‘ somewhere around the 1880s, I think, ’ or Will, who’d come to Neverland during the Blitz, using dreams to escape the nightmares of real life. But this new group of boys weren’t characters out of a book or an old black and white photo. 

“My mom named me after the guy in some robot movie that had just come out,” Kyle mentioned and it was a moment before it clicked. “The Terminator?!” He’d only shrugged. “That might’ve been it.” This boy was her age. He couldn’t have been born more than a couple of years after she was. Another boy’s tattered shirt had a faded image of Lilo and Stitch on it - he didn’t look more than twelve. These boys were just… kids. Regular kids like the ones she grew up with and the ones who lived in Storybrooke or Boston - boys like Henry. And now they were soldiers. 

“We have to do this,” Wendy answers, giving his fake sword a tap with her own so his arm straightens, “because everyone on this ship needs to be ready to defend her when the next raid happens - If you want to live until the next one.” 

“But we already know how to fight,” he whines. “We defeated you every time.” If Wendy’s upset at the casual mention of her crewmates being slaughtered, she doesn’t let it show. “I already know how to sword fight.” 

“Do you now?” Killian calls from the helm before she can answer. 

“Captain…” his first mate starts but he ignores her. He’s an imposing figure, clad in black leather with the metal of his hook gleaming in the sun and the weight of his sword heavy at his hip. As his footsteps echo across the deck as he makes his way over to where the boys had begun their training they all go silent. 

“Now now, Mr. Darling, if the boy thinks he’s beyond our instruction he should have the chance to prove himself.” He stops in front of the new recruit, drawing his sword in a slow, measured movement, the tip an inch from the kid’s nose and Emma panics for just a second that he might cut him down right there. But then he turns to Wendy, “Bosun, get this boy a real blade,” and she realizes he’s had exactly the effect he intended as everyone around him tenses. 

Wendy goes to fetch a weapon, shooting him the kind of eyeroll kids learn to make in front of adults without getting caught - one she knows very well.

“Think you can defeat me, boy?”

To his credit, Kyle straightens his shoulders, taking the offered sword and raising it to the Captain’s, ready for a fight. She thinks she might see the tiniest bit of approval beneath the scorn in Killian’s expression. The boy moves first, swinging at him with all his might as he deflects again and again. Killian’s toying with him - she knows he is. She saw Killian fight Will that first night on the Jolly. His blocks are too slow, letting the kid get within inches of hitting him. He doesn’t make a single attack, his feet unmoving and she’d think it was cruel if she didn’t understand why he was doing it. 

Finally, when the boy starts to sweat, she sees Killian shift, adjusting his stance as he swings at his opponent. The block comes almost too late, only stopped by the way Killian pulls back at the last moment. He does it again, and again, backing the boy across the deck with blow after blow. There’s no flourish to it, no showmanship, just skill and finesse and strength and speed.

The kid starts to panic, the attacks coming too fast and Emma holds back a gasp when Killian’s blade slices across Kyle’s forearm. After that, it’s easy for Killian to twist his blade out of the kid’s shocked hand with his own, his elbow coming up to knock the boy flat on his ass. By the time he looks up, nose bloody, eyes dazed and watery, Killian’s sword is pointed at his chest, his brow arched in a harsh challenge. 

“Please don’t kill me,” the boy says so quietly and so heartbreakingly that she thinks she sees Killian’s face soften just the barest amount before he takes a step back, dropping his sword. 

“Listen, all of you,” he booms, though every eye on the deck is already on him. “You’ve never defeated anyone. Until now you’ve been playing a game and the game has been rigged. And I’m sorry to say, you’re now on the losing team. The only thing that matters from this moment on is staying alive. And the only way to stay alive is being a skilled enough fighter - and knowing how to hold that skill back enough - that Pan will want to fight you again.”

 He lets this hang in the air for a moment, the boys’ faces showing different degrees of confusion and understanding and horror. “So all of you will follow Mr. Darling’s instructions and learn everything you can from him. You’ll fight to defend this ship, yourselves, and each other when the time comes because you’re part of my crew now.” He reaches a hook out to Kyle who sits cradling his nose and heaves the boy to his feet. “And we look after our own.” 

Killian looks at the boy who nods, message received loud and clear, before clapping him on the shoulder. “Scarlet, see that our newest crew member’s wounds are tended to. He put up quite the fight.” 

“Aye, Captain,” Will complies without argument or sarcasm and Killian must be as shocked as she is because he keeps his mouth shut. 

“Darling must have said something to him,” he tells her when Emma joins him, his sword sliding carefully back into its sheath as he watches Wendy continue her lesson. 

“Or maybe you just did.” Killian only looks at her, brow raised in disbelief before she gestures at the sword hanging at his belt. “So, come on, are you going to show me how to use this thing or not?”

His face splits into a shit-eating grin. “Ah, Swan, I’ve dreamed of the day that you’d ask me to show you how to handle my sword.”

***

“Do you want the good news or the bad news first?” Tinkerbell asks. She’d floated onto the ship that night, looking stronger than when Emma had last seen her - the few days with the Constant clearly having done her good. Her wings looked taller, fully unfurled, the crepe paper like skin no longer breakable and frail as they flutter behind her. 

“Is there good news?” Killian sighs, standing from his desk where he’d been looking over maps of the island while Emma asked him questions about them, how each was different based on when it was drawn, what Pan had changed, who he had brought. He seemed unbothered by the fairy magicking his window open and letting herself in. 

“They’ve agreed to meet with you. They haven’t agreed to help,” she clarifies when Killian looks surprised, “but they’ve agreed to hear you out.”

“And the bad news?” 

“They’ll only meet us in Echo Caves.”

Killian lets out a heavy, long suffering sigh, thumb brushing the inner corner of his brow, words dripping with sarcasm. “Wonderful. Did they happen to give a reason why?” 

“Something about making sure you can be trusted - some incident at skull rock?”

“It was a misunderstanding,” he mutters under his breath. 

“Really because the way I heard it -” 

“It’s fine. Tell them we agree to their terms. When do they expect us?”

“First light.” 

Killian nods. “We’ll be there. And Tink,” he adds when she turns to leave. “Thank you.” 

She sneers. “I’m not doing it for you.” And then she’s gone before he can say another word. 

“What’s Echo Caves?” Emma pulls her knees up to her chest where she’s perched on the desk after she’s sure the fairy’s out of earshot and Killian’s sagged back in his seat. 

“Another one of Neverland’s little delights,” he sighs again. “The magic of the cave compels you to share your deepest secret - whether or not you’re even aware of it.” 

“Have you gone before?” she asks. 

“Once.” His hand drifts up without her really noticing, fingers curling around her calf, thumb tracing over her shin and she thinks maybe it wasn’t a pleasant experience. “Pan wanted to test my loyalty.” She rests her chin on her knee, dreading what he may have had to confess to Pan to keep himself alive on this horrible island. He smiles up at her then, a put-on apathy. “Thankfully, I had many terrible deeds in my past to confess to.” He doesn’t give her a chance to say anything before he releases her and stands again - something dropped between them and something else put up. 

“Are you afraid?” 

Killian doesn’t look at her. “Always.” Her heart tightens. She understands - she’d only been here a few weeks and she’s been terrified every moment - apart from her brief experiment with fairy wine - centuries… she can’t imagine. “But not of the Constant. Tiger Lily may hold a grudge but they’ll do whatever’s best for this island, and so will their people. And I’ve no ill-intent towards them or love for Pan.” He looks at her then, pausing. “Are you?”

“Of having to spill my deepest secret to a bunch of strangers? No, why would I possibly be stressed about that?” she smirks half-heartedly. 

“Strangers?” Killian raises a brow, sliding back across the room and resting his hand and hook on the desk on either side of her. “You hurt me, Swan. I thought we were friends - acquaintances at least.” 

She shoves at his chest rolling her eyes and he smirks. “Usually a guy has to buy me dinner before he gets to hear the all sordid details of my past.” Or coffee in an empty theme park where a pretty smile and a well-placed sneak into his past makes her think she’s safe to reveal herself, to trust someone with all of it.

“Hey,” his thumb brushes over her knee as he tries to catch her gaze. “Where’d you go?”

Not anywhere he needs to know about - or anywhere she’d care to revisit. So she smiles at him, lets her foot brush against the side of his calf, teasing, distracting. “Just trying to figure out which of my deepest secrets are gonna come spilling out of me tomorrow.” He doesn’t believe her, his lie detector almost as good as her own, she's realized, but he doesn’t say anything about it. 

“Well you are a mystery, Swan,” he tells her with a half-hearted smirk. 

“Not for much longer, apparently.” 

Something shifts in the way he’s looking at her, sympathy or understanding as he cocks his head. “You know you don’t have to come if -” 

“I’m going.” 

Killian huffs a laugh. “Of course you are. Well if there’s anything you want to get off your chest without an audience, now’s the time.” His eyebrow quirks up in challenge. “Won’t be a secret anymore if you tell me.” She meets it. 

“What? Is one revelation about me not enough for you?”

Something shifts again, something heavier, her skin warm and humming with fear and anticipation as he looks at her the way he had when he’d been curled around her on the floor of the brig. His voice is lower when he speaks. “Perhaps I’d just like to know you, Swan.” 

She casts her eyes to the floor, his gaze too intense - always too intense - before setting the smirk that had fallen from her lips back in place. “You first.” 

“I’m an open book, love. Ask me anything you like.”

She has one question, one that’s been itching at the back of her mind since she’d seen the canvas of scars etched across his skin. “Who were you? Before you were here - before you were ‘Captain Hook’?”

His bravado falters for a moment. “I was many things. Son, brother, slave, sailor, lieutenant, captain, pirate, partner… None for very long.” He gives her another of those showy smirks. “It seems Hook is the only one that stuck.” Her heart breaks a little, so many loves lost and so many injustices done in such a short life. She thinks of the scars that had criss-crossed his back, that she’d asked about so casually then - slave he’d said - and she wishes she could do it over, pay both them and him the reverence they deserve. “What about you?” 

“What about me?”

His hand slides to her wrist, to the laces she’d tied there the first day she’d come back to the sheriff’s office alone. All of his things had been gone. Desk cleared out, jacket taken from the back of his chair, the few things he bothered to keep - a tacky ceramic wolf, a photo of him and some friends she never bothered to ask him about, even the bottle of whiskey he kept in his top drawer - had been ransacked. He had no family that she knew of - no family that could be found at all - and she’d just known that it was Regina. She’d come in and wiped every trace of Graham clean like he never existed - apart from a single pair of boots forgotten by the back door. 

“They belonged to someone I used to know.” 

“Someone you cared for?” 

“It doesn’t matter,” she shrugs. “He’s gone now.” 

“It mattered enough for you to keep a piece of him with you.” He fingers the laces again, focusing on them, not making her meet his eyes again. “I know what it is to lose the people that matter most.” 

Emma pulls her hand back, sliding them both behind her under the guise of leaning back on the desk and gives another dismissive shrug even as she can’t make herself look at him. “Yeah, well, when you grow up like I did you learn pretty quickly not to get attached.”

Thankfully, Killian knows how to take a hint, straightening and flashing her an off  grin. “If only we all possessed such a skill, Swan.” Then, pushing away from the desk,  “I best let the others know what awaits us all  tomorrow.” 

Emma swallows, this island has already taken so much from her - her son, her name, her memories - almost - her whole belief system… How much more can it really take? She doesn’t ask - not anymore as she slides into Killian’s bed instead of her own, and he doesn’t say anything as he joins her a few minutes later, just pulls her against him, breath warm and comforting against her cheek as they try to shut themselves off from the cries that ring out on the deck above them. 

*******

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[extremelynerdycat]

New Caleb au coming to my mind. Sorry I haven't been posting my own stuff recently. I've just struggled with motivation and all.

Spoilers for The Owl House if you haven't watched season 1 and 2.

Basically, a Peter Pan Caleb au, where Caleb became Peter Pan.

The classic story of Peter pan comes later, as Caleb never grows up anyway.

When Caleb decides to stay in the isles with Evelyn, the Isles inhabitants don't really respond to him very positively. They demand some sort of justice for his past witch hunting. Maybe he was really into it and bad before changing when meeting Evelyn. Maybe he wasn't. Whatever happened back then, however he felt, witches want to have him punished for it. So, they have a trial. In this trial, Caleb is decided to be guilty of some bad crimes. Caleb takes this all without fuss. He feels himself that he deserves it. What's the punishment?

Caleb gets sent to this God. A collector or something similar perhaps. Maybe the guardian from amphibia? The idea of the punishment is that they bring him to this God who will determine the proper course of action. They expect that action to be a punishment and way of redemption. The god looks into all of his past actions like that demon that flicks through books fast.

That God is like, yeah, he was pretty bad once. But, now he isn't. In fact, he was robbed of a childhood and everything. You know what people? I'm making him a LITERAL GOD.

People are shocked. But, this God is trusted by most if not all. Caleb isn't sure how to react.

The God makes him young, and gives him his Peter pan outfit, or something similar, cause he could make it later. The God announces that he is to be called Peter from now on to signify his change for the better in the isles.

Pan comes later, when he starts using a pan flute.

Evelyn and Caleb in this au never really had a romantic relationship anyway. With Calebs powers and training to use them hes not around her much either so their friendship fades. He feels more free and acts like a child. He thinks like a child.

Tinkerbell he meets later. If his flight comes from tinkerbell, as I'm still learning about Peter pan, it would turn out it didn't originally actually. The God gave it to him. Also, any other powers came from becoming a god. Like I think he might be able to mind read in the play.

His backstory he gives in the Peter pan stories isn't actually true. They are false memories built by his real memories mixing together and being modified. Part of his godness causes this memory changing, so that he never remembers more time than maybe about 4 times his physical age. Which is about 11. Anything else is just undesipherable flickers he misinterprets. (Just enough to remember Wendy.)

Neverland is a specific realm that is connected to Caleb's powers and follows his wants, for the most part. Straight on to the 2nd star to the right is really where an invisible tear in the realms is. He wants adventure? It creates captain hook and the pirates to fight. He wants a cool outdoor place? That's why it's an island. He hears of stories about fairies that arent like the isles fairies? Now they are real. The lost boys he actually found the same way he says he did though. That's why it's said Neverland comes to life when he returns.

Originally Caleb didn't have Peter pans flaws, however he had others. He shifted over time in personality due to the memory loss, like generations of a group of people and their culture.

His shadow moving on its own is one of his powers, designed to give him the ability to send it away as a scout. However, due to his now childish nature and time, his relationship with his shadow isn't good in the Peter pan story. It originally was good.

Similar to his entry into Wendy's house, when looking for his shadow, Caleb sneaks into Philips cave. (He had no clue philip found out about his relationship with Evelyn and followed. He just discovered he was there.) Philip and his reunion is odd. Maybe it's similar to the memory paintings, but it's not quite. He flys around a lot. He's also not sure how to handle the situation, especially since he lost maturity from the spell so that he would represent childhood.

Caleb's Peter pan in this isn't secretly crazy or evil. The story plot is like a mix between the play, musical, other play adaptations, and the movies. (The early versions of the story are bad in certain ways. The isles were quite good, and that hasnt left him, so the classics plot has none of that.)

The reason Peter pan has elf/witch ears is because his ears slowly changed to reflect his magical nature.

He's friends with the collector. The Collector just happens to be a child god however, whereas he's the god of childhood, so the collector will outgrow him eventually. He finds the collector and frees him by stealing Philips notes. He's friends with that stonesleeper actually, but he forgot about it when it fell asleep for 50 or so years somewhere on neverland, and in the most recent happenings, has yet to wake up. The Collector goes off somewhere in space to do what he wants. (Caleb kept him from destroying or hurting the isles.) Philip never becomes Belos.

It's mentioned in some sources that Peter pan has nightmares from his suppressed memories. That's true for Caleb Peter. He has nightmares about losing Evelyn, others, losing Philip, Philip, and his Gravesfield trauma.

Philips attempts to kill witches and that whole situation is a whole other can of worms that I will unpack later.

He looks like Disney Peter but with Caleb's face and hair, and owl house artstyle. He has disney Peter's ears.

He meets Luz and takes her to neverland. No crush is involved to be clear. Luz just wanted to get put of camp. Hunter does exist, but he's Luz's brother and looks different because he's related to her. He doesn't come to Neverland. He has no idea where Luz went.

The clawthorns like Eda and Lilith exist but they just look different as Evelyn had a different husband.

Neverland is the demon realm inspired. Caleb also still remembers the demon realm and uses the portal door, which he created, to go there often. He introduces Luz to the demon realm where due to his carelessness Luz gets lost and meets King and Eda. Somehow they still become family. Caleb joins in that family but insists on never growing up.

Caleb can't remember that kings a titan so they have no idea.

The owl deity theory could have the owl deity be that God that made him a god.

Caleb is immortal. He will not die.

Any ideas to add to this au? Also,

[spark-yukinghoul]

Uh, yeah this is, wow, so, Hello, i am Spark or Yukin, i am new on Tumblr and wanted to tell a few things about myself before i may or may not be crazy active as to writing or so, or be not active and just be here and reading better fanfics than on Wattpad ( Wattpad still have many good stories!! )

I do not have any actual pronounce so feel free to give me whatever you like!

I am Recently very much in the Band Ghost fan base as a little “newbie“ and found many wholesome stories on tumblr which lead to me making an account and now posting myself on here, though it might not be as good as many other people on this app/website/platform, truth be told i have not yet listened to every ghost song there is and have yet to catch up on a lot of the Lore.

Now, I take Requests for Writing as i wanna improve my story writing and saw that a few ghouls were very underrated, such as Mountain, who i only really saw was written in smuts/nsfw/lemons here, or Cirrus, Cumulus and Sunshine, i have yet not found a single story about those ghoulettes or maybe its because i am really fucking blind, anywho, moving on!

I also take requests for writing about specific Animes or TV shows or Movies, except for Horror Movies, i am not able to comprehend the beings of what’s being told within those movies and i have severe Paranoia that doesn‘t let me sleep once i see something very frightening that i am not able to process within a few Minutes of my existence, there fore i also will be giving a list of Shows, Movies and Animes (or fandoms) that i know of or i am in ( or was once in)

It will be quiet a lot as i haven‘t listed that stuff in quiet a while or maybe i never even did such a thing but oh well, here is the list:

Anime:

Black Butle

Haikyuu

Fruits Basket

BNHA/MHA (Boku no Hero Academia)

Blue Exorcist

Soul Eater

Toilet-Bound Hanako-Kun

Tokyo Ghoul

Yarichin-BItch Club ( i am so sorry-)

Demon Slayer

No Game No Life

School-Live!

The Promised Neverland

Hunter x Hunter

Assasination Classroom

Corpse Party

Trinity Seven

Another

The Seven Deadly Sins

Miss Kobayashi‘s Dragon Maid

Zombie Land Saga

Angles of Death

Free!

TV Shows:

(Not many)

Phines and Ferb

Avatar

Gravity Falls

The Simpsons

Timmy Tuner

The Bugs Bunny Show

The Witcher (only made it through season 1)

Movies: (also not a lot)

Transformers

Harry Potter

The Hobbit

Lord of the Rings

Bumblebee

Avatar (not the Cartoon, the Blue Cat like Creatures)

Tangled

Cinderella

Frozen

Spirited Away

Minions

Other Fandoms:

Aphmau:

- Mystreet

- Minecraft Diaries

- Phoenix Drop High

- My Inner Demons

Creepypasta

The band Ghost

Undertale

Obey Me!

Sonic

Baldis Basic

Bendy and the Ink Machine

FNAF

Yeah, it‘s a lot, a ton fucking lot that i know of, many of those Movies or Series i have not watched through making it hard to recall on many of them, i had to literally look up TV show and Anime Lists to refresh my memory and i know its yet still not done, but this is so far the most i can tell and i am happy to know about your guy‘s request as to what i sha‘ll write in the near future, if this should ever happen, i am happy to say that i am Glad to be on Tumblr as not many people seem to use it anymore.

Idk were i mentioned it but i also have my own version of the Band Ghost Fan base / Fandom in a Alternative Universe (AU), it is a lot more complicated and by far the weirdest thing i ever wrote in my notes but if you are up to listening( ha ha ha) to us then i am more than happy to post about this fandom here on Tumblr! (And also what the specific things are in my AU, he he he)

I hope this has caught your attention and if it did, thank you for Reading until the end and i hope to see someone who would like this! See you all in the next Post i guess??

[boymayorr]

me with tpn season 2

[snowbellewells]

Once upon a time for the ask game thingy hehe

Okay, both you @itsfabianadocarmo and @cosette141 asked for my answers on this for OuaT, so here goes!!! 😜

Fandom Ask Game

Send me a movie/book/show and I'll tell you:

favorite character: I mean, the obvious answer here is Killian Jones. And, believe me, I do love our pirate hero very, very much. But my true favorite character of the entire show (hopefully no one throws me out of the CS fandom for this) is Sheriff Graham/the Huntsman. I just adored him from the first time we met him. My heart still breaks for him. And I am always going to think he deserved better (and we deserved more of him!)

least favorite character: Probably either Cora/the Queen of Hearts or Gothel/Eloise Gardiner in Season 7

brOTP: I do really enjoy some Captain Charming - they have such a fun bros and family both connection! - but my heart really belongs to Killian and Belle. Captain Book/Captain Beauty, whichever you want to call it is such a lovely friendship. I treasure every teeny little scene of it we got to see. There’s something so redemptive and wonderful in them overcoming their past animosity and becoming friends, and I absolutely adore them bonding and having each other’s backs! 💖

OTP: It’s Captain Swan, absolutely, all the way, they’ve really taken over most of my imagination and free time! 😅 (In all fairness, I did at the start think Gremma, or HuntSwan, could be my True Love OTP, but the show very literally killed that possibility. And of course, we then met a certain dashing rapscallion who managed to win Emma’s heart… 😏)

OT3: This isn’t really a category I give lots of thought. I have read some amazing fic though with Liam/Killian/Emma as an OT3. The one that I’d call my favorite though is what I’ve sometimes seen called Irish Swan Trio: Killian/Graham/Emma. (That I would happily read more of, if it was more commonly written. 🤭)

NOTP: I have (very rarely, thankfully) stumbled upon mostly modern au fics that have Regina and Graham hooking up, or friends with benefits, or friendly exes. I absolutely cannot handle that; it is so far from what that situation truly was and it’s just upsetting to his memory. I’m also not at all a fan or HookedQueen or SwanQueen. Neither of those make much sense to me, nor does Regina even seem to like either of them much or treat them at all well. Why would they be in a relationship?

favorite storyline: It’s probably, honestly, season one. Where we first see Emma coming to Storybrooke, getting to know her son, discovering magic and fairytales are real, figuring out who all the townspeople were in the storybook, all of that. The magic is so enchanting in that first season, and it seems the most tightly well-written to me. I often say the first season’s only real flaws are Graham’s death and Killian not being there yet!

If that’s too huge a chunk to be a favorite storyline, then I’d probably say the Save Henry trip to Neverland.

least favorite storyline: I am not a fan of the second half of Season 2. It gets all convoluted and disjointed to me, and Greg and Tamara were so pointless and annoying. I don’t know if that’s so much a storyline as a least favorite segment because there doesn’t seem to be as clear a storyline, but there you are all the same. 🤷🏼‍♀️

what I wish had happened but didn't: I’m never going to stop wishing that Emma and Killian had gotten a rainbow blast True Love’s Kiss like all the other True Love couples. I know their True Love was proven in another way, but still, come on!!! 🤨

Even more than that though, I wish

1) that Emma and Killian would have had a secret small, private wedding in the Underworld with Liam performing it so he could be there, which would be an excellent callback to Snow and Charming’s first private wedding performed by Lancelot so Charming’s mother could be there.

And 2) that when we learned about the meanings behind the gravestones in the Underworld they would have gone and found Graham’s and at least learned that he had passed on and was at peace.

**Maybe I should have mentioned 5b as a not-so-favored storyline - so much potential wasted!

what happened that I wish hadn't: I would have loved them to do so much more with Jekyll and Hyde (and Jafar, for that matter) rather than split Queenie and the Black Fairy in Season 6 😝 I also would not have had Ruby run off with Dorothy.

[alreadyblondenow]

Second Star to the Right | Na Jaemin

✦ Jaemin x reader ✦ Fluff, Smut, Smut, Smut, Angst, Fairy AU ✦ 1/5 for HOLIDAY SERIES: Once Upon A December

Summary: Jaemin is a mere tooth fairy who’s just doing his job collecting teeth became you’re one and only true friend. You have strict parents so you crave for adventure and so Jaemin offered you one and brought you to Neverland. As you two grew old together, you became closer and soon fall in love with each other. Seasons change and so does your feelings towards Jaemin. Will a tooth fairy and a human will have a happy ending?

Word count: 7,532k

Warnings: Heavy cheating, swearing, skinny dipping, unprotected sex, loss of virginity, fingering, oral sex, nipple play, betrayal, slight swearing, mentions of Jaemin being peeping tom 

A/N: PURE FICTION. Inspired by the fairytale Peter Pan, but not following the main plot. Just the idea of never growing up, fairies and pixie dust. It’s a cute story of saying good bye to your innocence, childhood, and accepting that you’re growing. Nothing heavy don’t worry. 

Neoholiday entry #1 @nct-writers​ | To: @jimjamjaemin​ From: Bear

6 years old

Days have always been laid down for you from the moment you wake up until you close your eyes good night. At a very young age, you’ve grown very tired of this routine and dreamt of being a normal kid like your cousins or the kids that you see at the mall. Given that you’re homeschooled, you don’t know anyone that’s not family or staff in your house.

“Oh, would you look at that,” your nana hold your chin to look at your loose tooth and had a wild guess on when it’s going to come out. “If you keep playing with it with your tongue it will come out faster... and you will meet your tooth fairy soon” she tricks you.

As a very smart kid at a very young age, you know that tooth fairies are just characters from a storybook and probably not real. Maybe the idea of meeting someone new excites you to the core that you don’t care if they’re real or not and all you did is play with your loose tooth while reading a book, while drawing or coloring, while playing the piano, just so you could meet a new friend.

Your tooth came out the next day during breakfast with your parents. Unexpectedly you felt it came out while you were chewing your bread. Without any hesitation, you ran to the kitchen to find your nana and show her your teeth with the biggest smile.

“Where did she learned to be excited like that? Not so proper for a young girl” your mom says to your dad, pouting her lips and looking at him coldly.

While you were looking for your nana, all the staff in your house is busy eating breakfast and greeting you ‘good morning little Ms.’ as you ran past them and give them a sweet smile. “It came out nana, what do I do next?” you tell her the great news and showed her your tooth.

“Tonight, you put it under your pillow and try to catch that fairy! You’re a smart girl, I know you can do it” she smiled proudly at you and told you to go back to your parents.

As you go on with your normal routine, you waited patiently for bedtime and made the preparations for meeting that tooth fairy. Although you’re not sure if someone will really go in your room tonight, you still baked cookies for the fairy and hope to gain a new friend. When bedtime finally came, you secure your tooth under your pillow, fluff your blankets, and checked the baked cookies on your bedside table.

You waited with your eyes closed.

Waited.

Waited.

“Her room is big....” Jaemin murmurs to his friend Renjun. “Oh look, there's cookies” he whispered.

“Yeah yeah. We're here to work, Taeyong will be pissed if we don’t make it back in time- I’ll cover the next kid,”

He leaves his friend with great worries because Jaemin doesn’t know how to follow protocol, and always mess things up. Either way, Jaemin needs to learn how to be a tooth fairy.

Slowly, he opens your window and made his way inside, scanned your room, and looked at a few books. “She must be smart” he murmurs again. He scanned and feed his curiosity until he wants to while eating the baked cookies that you made.

“You’re a boy?”

The fact that fairies are true did not shock you at all but knowing that the tooth fairy is a boy was indeed a shocker to you.

“Well yeah... aren’t you supposed to be sleeping? I can’t give you a coin if you’re awake” Jaemin reasons out with a cute smile. “You baked these?”

he continues to eat the cookie in his hand.

“Yes. Did you like it?”

“Absolutely. Thank you”

You bit your lip out of disappointment as he came closer to you and stopped his curiosity when he sees your pout. Why? His curiosity switched to you and he wanted to know why you look sad, “I mean it. It’s delicious” he sat at the edge of your bed, near you but not close enough.

“I thought you’re a girl, I wanted a friend” you frown.

“Well, I can’t be a girl, but I can still be your friend- if you want” he smiles awkwardly at you.

Without hesitation, you turned your frown upside down and reached for your tooth under your pillow, and hand it to your new friend. “Wow. Did it hurt?” he asked.

“Nope. Didn’t hurt a little, it went off when I was chewing bread this morning. I was so happy” you giggle and smiled at him, you noticed he has a nice smile and his pearly whites.... are perfect. Just like how a tooth fairy is supposed to be. As you two exchange more stories and feed each other’s curiosity, Jaemin forgot that he’s supposed to meet Renjun at the gates of Neverland and go back together.

“Oh my, I need to get going-“

You see his body glow in an instant, as he ready himself to fly. A pixie dust he says, and it can make him fly if he believes in it. “I guess this is goodbye then?” you said as you come near your window and watch him float.

“Oh no no. We’re friends now right? And I’m your tooth fairy so we’ll meet again soon. Just believe in me”

“Where are you from? Can I visit you?”

He shook his head and pointed at a star in the sky. “Neverland. Second star to the right” he explains excitedly. Without any other word or goodbyes, he jumped from your window and flew away. You felt the wind gush on your face as you watch him fly, happy that everything happened according to plan, even happier that it’s never goodbye with Jaemin.

You now have a proper friend.

13 years old

Years have passed now and Jaemin’s job as your assigned tooth fairy is long gone. Although it was a test of patience because he can only visit you whenever you have a loose tooth, he taught you how to trust the next moments that are bound to happen, meaning “there’s always a time for everything. And besides, it’s never goodbye between us it’s always ‘see you later’ right?” he says. After being your tooth fairy, now, he’s just your friend and he can visit you every night after he collects teeth from different children, sacrificing your sleep just so you can meet Jaemin every night.

“How’s school? Are they nice to you?”

You and Jaemin lay on your carpeted floor while looking at the stars through your window. It’s your first day in school today and only Jaemin knew how nervous you were because you’ve been homeschooled all your life.

“They’re nice. But they’re not you” you answered truthfully.

“But you have to try because I’m not always with you. It’s hard to be alone in a place where you’re not used to”

“Look at you, you always take care of me” you turned your head to him and smiled sweetly, “I’ll try” you added.

“Just make sure you’ll never forget about me… or else I’ll fade” there's a slight hint of sadness in his tone when he told you that. Like he’s scared of losing you even though he has many friends already.

He told you a long time ago that he exists because you believe that he does, and if you forget about him he will fade.

As you gave your schoolmates a chance and befriend them, eating out and going out on weekends, you realized that if you have too much fun with them, eventually, whether you like it or not, you will forget about Jaemin. And you never want that to happen. Jaemin has done so much for you, and he doesn’t deserve to be forgotten. With that, you decided to make him your priority without being a loner at school.

“So after we went to the movies, we went to this park and walked hand in hand it was so romantic…” you’re FaceTiming with your friend while you wait for Jaemin, giggling like a little girl from your friend’s stories and secretly wishing to experience a good date someday. Holding hands while walking in the park, going to movies, kissing. Sounds…. normal, and you want every taste of it.

While you were fantasizing about holding someone’s hand, you see Jaemin floating outside your window smiling like he hasn’t seen you for weeks. “Hey-Uhm… I have to go, my mom is calling me and I should go. See you tomorrow-“ you finished the call without letting your friend say her goodbye and went to your window and welcome Jaemin.

“I saw you smiling, what’s that all about?” he says, giving you a small seashell from one of the islands from Neverland. He has a habit of bringing something small for you every time he visits as if he’s sharing a part of his world with you.

“Oh that. I’m just listening to my friend about her first date with her crush- Date, uhm it’s uh… humans do that to know each more, they go out and eat somewhere”

“I’m guessing you want to do it?” he knows you well. You smile shyly as you place the seashell on your shelf. You didn’t answer him yes, because you know he’ll figure it out himself. “Let’s go on a date then” he blurted out. Just like that.

“How are we going to do that when you’re not allowed to visit me when the sun is up?” you crossed your arms and squint at him. Amused with how much he’s willing to risk just so he can give you everything.

“Pixie dust. Neverland. Come on, it will be fun trust me”

His idea of a date was beyond something you could imagine. You never thought of someday going to Neverland but if he told you to trust him, then you will trust him with all your heart. He grabs his pixie dust bag from behind him and sprinkled some of it at the top of your head. Is this really happening? Is he really going to take you on a date to Neverland just so you could know how it feels like going on a date? The wind gushes on your face as you stand near your window, nervous because “Jaem, I don’t know how to do this” you weren’t scared, of course, you trust the pixie dust but you just don’t know how to fly.

“Right… right I’m sorry. Here grab my hand”

His offer made you feel shy for the first time. So it’s really a date then because you’re going to hold hands… Without wasting any more time, you grab his hand and grip it nicely, savoring the feeling of holding his soft hand for the first time. Little did you know that Jaemin is enjoying this. The way you hold his hand gives him a nice nervous feeling, butterflies in his tummy, and blushing like crazy.

Flying is an indescribable feeling, you thought. Walking on air and flying towards a star, it’s like you're having a dream when he told you to close your eyes, and the next thing you know you’re in Neverland.

“Time is different here. In your world it’s night time, here it’s day time- There’s Mark! I want you to meet my friends”

Your date started with Jaemin introducing you to some of the tooth fairies, you know everyone by name because Jaemin tells you stories about them for the past years. It’s like you are friends with them too by this point. From there on, you two enjoyed Neverland for the first time together. The date was nothing like how your friend described it. No holding hands while walking at the park, but he was holding your hand tightly while you fly to Neverland. No movies, but he brought you to a garden full of closed flowers and watch it bloom together. No kissing to end a perfect night, but he gave you a very handsome smile that made your heart race like it was your first time seeing Jaemin smile like that. The night was special, more than special actually.

When he brought you back safely to your room, you feel like something changed between you and Jaemin after having that date. He felt it too, but he’s shy to mention it.

“I’m glad you’re my first date,” you told him.

“I’m glad too” he puts a flower on your hair, something he’s been carrying all this time while you were flying. “See you tomorrow then?”

“Can’t wait, as always” He smiled shyly at you and fly away like he always does.    

That night, you slept with a smile on your face and dreamt about being with Jaemin again in Neverland. On the next day, you kept thinking about him and not just about your date with him. You kept thinking about his smile, his deep voice, and all the sweet things he said to you.

Everything changed after that date but no one is brave enough to admit it. The things you do together for years like laying in your bed and waiting for you to sleep while talking nonstop now make your body warm and it makes you shy. Whenever he tells you you’re pretty, you wanted him to say it over and over again. Until you two had enough of lying and admitted that you’re in love with each other. The problem is… you’re both too young. The way he told you how he feels for you we're sweet and honest, he intertwines his fingers with yours and hugs you tightly in your bed.

“Let’s wait a little longer,” he says. “we're too young and I don’t want to ruin us, I’m scared of losing you always” Again, him and his patience. Nonetheless, you understand what he’s saying and it’s true. There's no need to rush and it’s better to wait than regret bad decisions after.  

Days become months and months became years, you and Jaemin took your time before finally being adults. Soon, forehead kisses turned into soft kisses on the lips, hungry ones, or lustful ones. ’Goodnights’ were added with sweet ‘i love yous’ and ’stay a little longer.’ Dates in Neverland happens once a week, just being together and forgetting everything else. The idea of sex crosses your mind already but never actually doing it. It’s good that you’re growing together and learning different kinds of things. It makes you feel untouchable like it’s almost impossible that you two will someday break up. So impossible.

19 years old

Every day with Jaemin is nothing but adventure and new things, but ever since you two started seeing each other and acknowledging your feelings, days have been always sweeter than yesterday. Holding hands while flying, cuddling in your bed before you go to sleep, a lot of stolen and surprise kisses. These things are all new to you and Jaemin, but just like normal teenagers you just let love do its job and enjoy the wonderful feeling of being in love.

It was hot in Neverland today but Jaemin told you he had found another secret place that can make you stop sweating and he’s so proud of it. He brought you to a cave somewhere deep inside the forest but inside that cave, is an underground lake that has cool and very clear water.

“How did you find this? It’s beautiful” you exclaim as you look around the place. 

“I just did and it’s my way of making you smile“ he never fails to amaze you. “come on, let’s swim” he was quick to remove his clothes like it was a normal thing for him, he completely forgot that your relationship is not yet on the stage where you’re confident with seeing each other’s naked body.

“Uhm-Jaem,” you tried to avoid looking at his nice body and butt, biting your lip as he stretches his muscles confidently while his back faces you. He had grown confidently lately and not to mention so handsome and manly.

“What? Don’t be shy. But if you’re not comfortable, you can swim wearing your underwear. I don’t mind” he says, not facing you yet. It’s not fair you thought, he trusts you to see his whole being and so should you. You gulped and told him not to turn around until you’re fully naked and upon hearing that, Jaemin became suddenly nervous and blushing but you can’t see it.

“Are you naked now?” he asks, scratching the back of his head as he waits for you to give him permission to see you.

“Y-yeah” you answered. You told yourself that whatever happens, you will not look at his cock but as he turns slowly, you don’t know why your eyes can’t stop looking at it. You felt your cheeks warm and suddenly you became shy and you wanted to cover yourself. But he saw right through you, smiled, and hold your hand before jumping into the water together.

The cool water feels great against your skin as you and Jaemin enjoy the hot afternoon and turn it into a nice new experience for the two of you. Swimming deep into the water, racing against each other, picking up shells, the fun made you both forget that you’re naked and helped you with you’re shyness.

“So did you have fun?”  

You were laying on the grass with closed eyes, as you enjoy the warm sunlight peeking from above the cave and at the same time drying your skin before you wear your clothes again. Jaemin is beside you with his shoulder propped and is unbelievably close to you, secretly admiring your naked body and how beautiful you are under the warm sunlight.

“I did. Thank you” you turned your head to face and opened your eyes, “Jaem, what did you feel when you saw me naked for the first time earlier?” you reach for his face and cup it with one hand.

“Shy, at the same time excited because we get to do this but most importantly, I felt lust and my mind was so quick to think about dirty things I want to do- I’m sorry” he was quick to apologize and kissed your hand lovingly.

“No, it’s fine. I felt it too”

Jaemin was taken aback and felt the lust again but this time even stronger that he felt his cock hardens and poke the side of your thigh. “So” he was shy to ask you something but somehow the lust he’s been feeling is giving him the push, “can I try something? If that's okay with you? Baby?”

You only nod, but the way his voice deepens when he asked you made you nervous and excited. Just like Jaemin, you felt the lust he talked about. He came closer, closer, and closer, and until he reaches your exposed shoulder and planted a soft kiss there. But it didn’t end there. He kissed you on the same spot again, but this time he kissed you all the way down until his lips reached your boob and his hot breath is making your nipples sensitive.

His tongue made contact on your nipples first, then you felt his lips, and the next thing you know he’s sucking your right boob. It feels so good that you roll your head back and close your eyes again while letting out soft moans. Soon your hand rests at the back of Jaemin’s head, combing your fingers on his soft locks, and tugging whenever he playfully bites your nipple to make you giggle.

And right then and there your innocence was stained and it was the start of a different exploration and curiosity with Jaemin.

“How?” You were still surprised about what he just did but you love it and at the same time curious.

“Me and the other fairies peek whenever Mark and his girlfriend do it in the woods. Then we’ll tease him after”

“Pervert” you tease him.

“Want to do more?” he offers. You see the lust in his eyes as you look at him. You nod, of course, you want more.

He attacked you with hungry kisses and kneeled in between your legs without hesitation, putting his fingers to work and started touching you on your pussy. Once again you were taken aback by his confident move but instead of getting shy you accepted it and spread your legs wider so he can gain more access to your pussy. Jaemin noticed that his fingers were gliding smoothly on your slit because you were wet and he caused it, he also knew that you’re loving what he’s doing because your moans sound great, you’re rolling your hips, and you’re parting your lips. Which makes him want to dive into lust even more.

“Do you want to do it?” he whispers beside your ear while his fingers still drawing slow circles and gliding up and down your wet slit.

“Sex?” You asked back.

“Yeah” Jaemin started kissing your neck while he waits for your answer.

“If you promise you won’t hurt me”

He’s not stupid. He knew you weren’t talking about the sex. He knew you were talking about what you deserve. Jaemin stopped what he’s doing and kissed your lips sincerely, “I promise. I will never hurt you” he says and kissed you again deeply. It was a sweet promise, you thought and, hearing it made you fall in love with him even more.

Before he proceeds to the sex, he grabs your hand, kissed your knuckles, and made you touch his perfect body slowly, all the way down until you reach his cock. You touched it confidently without leaving his eyes, and you witnessed your boyfriend breathe heavily as you help him pump his cock.

“That’s going inside of you, baby. Ready?”

“Yes”

You feel him line his cock on your very wet entrance, kept his eyes on you as he pushes inside you oh so slowly. You were both virgins and neither of you knew if you’re doing it correctly, but it feels so fucking good that you’re heavily breathing as Jaemin continues to push in. Even tho he wanted to just force his way inside you, he can't because he knew you’re feeling the stretch because you’re so tight. You hiss but you smile, and when he asks you if you’re okay you told him that, “it hurts but I don’t want you to stop”

He chuckled low and said, “okay. But if I do this-“ he rolled his hips without a warning and it made you both moan a little too loud. “You felt that?” he asked, completely mind blown with what a single thrust can do to the both of you.

“Do it again”

And so he did. Again and again and again, until you’re scratching his back and he’s groaning beside your ear deliciously. Telling you how good it feels, praising you with every second that he can, pushing in deeply as he can because you request it.

“I can’t cum that’s dangerous,” he says and he sounded like he’s in pain.

“Shit- right, okay”

Without hesitation and before he loses his mind and makes you pregnant, he pulled out and lay beside you. Stopping himself with all the strength he has left. It was very frustrating for both of you not having the full experience.

“I'm sorry,” he says, heavily breathing beside you still handsome and very inviting.

“You did nothing wrong baby, what are talking about“

“For not making you cum, beautiful. I’ll get your clothes”

You watch him stand up from the warm ground with a hard cock and blushing cheeks. You didn’t cum but still, you felt so weak, and the sting from your pussy is still there. Nonetheless, Jaemin looked so handsome while fucking you, not to mention he sounds sexy. “Here” he helped you get up and handed you your clothes.

Just like that, you made another unforgettable memory with Jaemin that you wouldn’t trade for anything. He sprinkled some pixie dust on your head and flew you back to your room safe and sound.

“I meant what I said earlier. Don’t forget it okay? Just trust me like how you trust my pixie dust to carry you home. I love you” he kissed you on your forehead, smiled so handsomely “see you tomorrow” and left another great promise of seeing each other again.

The next day, while you were eating lunch with your friends they were telling stories about their weekends with their boyfriends. You wanted to tell them so bad that you had a great weekend with Jaemin too, but you’re afraid they will ask you too many questions. Questions that you can’t answer truthfully because you’re afraid they will see you as a crazy person that believes in fairies.

As you listen to them, you can’t help but envy them. You want to share stories with them too, tell all your experiences and such…. like a normal person. “I heard Lee Jeno has a crush on you” your friend whispers beside your ear, completely bringing you back to reality and taking your mind off of Jaemin.

“Lee Jeno who?” you answered and to them, you sound dumb.

“Lee Jeno. The most handsome guy in school? Sharp jawline, small eyes, sexy figure?”

As she describes that Lee Jeno guy you can’t help but to think about Jaemin because for you he’s still the most handsome guy in your eyes. “Well, I’m not interested. Thanks for liking me I guess” they scoffed and teased you further, telling you that they will introduce you to Jeno soon so you will understand how handsome he is.

“Try me. I will still not be interested in him” you cross your arms as you challenge your friends, “in fact, what’s so special about this Lee Jeno guy? Is he nice? Does he know how to treat a girl right? How to touch a girl?” you were describing Jaemin to them, but they were clueless of course. They were quiet and smirking and you wonder why. Little did you know that someone is listening from behind.

He sat on the vacant chair beside you and smiled at you, “Lee Jeno” he offered his hand for you to shake, and of course, being the nice girl that you are, you introduced yourself back.

After that day Lee Jeno kept on talking to you at school, asking you out but you never said yes. But because of his consistency and perseverance, you finally said yes to him just so he could stop bugging you. And right then there, you know that Jaemin will not like this. It’s been weeks since you last saw each other and being a senior tooth fairy gave him a lot of responsibilities that kept you from seeing each other every night just like you used to. But even though he’s busy, sometimes, if he can, he always finds his way to your house before he comes home after working with Renjun.

“Hey” you were in deep concentration with writing your paper when he kissed you on your cheeks. Surprised that he’s finally here, your arms swing around his neck automatically, and kissed him back on the lips, letting how the way you kiss him tell him how much you miss him. “I miss you too-Sorry for not being here always. Taeyong is giving us a hard time, there are a few kids in your neighborhood and the new fairies weren’t ready yet”

“Right… kids” you sounded bothered, you wanted to tell him about your date with Jeno but you just miss him so much that all you did is tell him how much you’re proud of him for being a good tooth fairy.

“I brought you these” he hands you a few flowers from Neverland so you could put them in between your books, “so you could think of me while you study too,” he was just about to kiss you again when Rejun appeared on your window with Mark to get him and keep them on schedule.

“Sorry” he says before kissing you one too many times on the lips, your face, and your hands. “I love you. I have to go, see you soon okay?”

“I understand, go. Fly safe.” And that’s all you needed from him. You’re so in love with Jaemin that you understand everything he does in his life and never get mad at him even though sometimes he never gets to see you. “patience” you murmur to yourself and went back to writing your paper.

Today is your date with Jeno and you wanted to ditch him so bad that you arrived late and let him freeze outside the cinemas. But even though you missed almost half of the movie, he still smiled so sweetly at you that his eyes almost disappear. “I’m happy you still came. It’s so wrong of me to think that you’re going to ditch me last minute. I’m sorry”

“I’m sorry that I’m late” you’re not, but you tell him anyway.

“It’s normal. People can arrive late during dates, I’m just glad you came”

The word ‘normal’ lingers in your mind as you two entered the cinemas. The movie is nice, it made you cry and Jeno dried your tears while patting your head and providing comfort. He brought you to a place where you two can eat something good and heavy after eating popcorn. On top of that, he seems sweet and careful, he listens to you and he cares about what you think all the time. After the date, he brought you home safely and asked if he could kiss you.

“N-no…” you stepped away from him.

“It’s fine. I’m sorry. I can wait” he smiles awkwardly, hands inside the pocket of his jacket, “Did you had a great time?”

“Yes I did” and that’s the truth, you told him with a smile.

The night ended with you waiting for Jaemin in your room, but your mind kept playing every moment you had with Jeno. He’s more than just sharp jawlines and sexy figure, he’s a gentleman. Like Jaemin. And this is bad because it’s not hard to have a crush on him.

“you didn’t see me came in-“

“Shit!” Jaemin completely startled you when you saw him lying comfortably in your bed. He doesn’t look like he’s in a hurry, and that makes you happy.

“You were out late, you’re not yet in your sleepwear” he kisses your forehead as you cuddle close, oh you miss him.

“I did something normal today” and that’s all you could share about what happened today. He didn’t need to know what happened between you and Jeno.

“That’s great- listen, I will be away for a few weeks training the new fairies-“

“What- Away again?” you whine and pout at him, “But I miss you already. I never get to see you or spend time with you”

“I know. I’m sorry, but after this, I promise I will stick to like a shadow. I missed you too, I’ll try my best to speed things up. In the meantime, do more normal things like what you did today and leave the extraordinary things to me. Come on, smile for me”

Little did he know you cheated on him today. You forced a smile and kissed him hungrily until you ended on top of him. You removed your shirt and from there everything happened so fast. The next thing you know his lips are on your nipples with your bra cups pulled down and you’re moaning quietly. “I have condoms here” you whispered to Jaemin with a very sexy voice. Or at least you tried.

“Inviting. But I can’t stay for long. I’m sorry I kept disappointing you” And just like that your mood died and you grabbed your blanket to cover yourself. “Mark is outside. I’m sorry” he kissed you one last time before he tucks you to bed and you watch him fly away.

"Do tell!!!"

Because your friends don’t know the meaning of privacy, they kept asking you about your date with Jeno. ‘Did you guys have sex?’ ‘Did he used his tongue?’ ‘Second date?’ all these questions were hilarious because none of it happened, but to make them shut up you told them everything. It’s your first time sharing something that happened during the weekend it makes you feel… normal. Jeno made you feel normal.

You then realized that being with Jaemin isn’t normal, because he’s a fairy.

Days without Jaemin made you became friendly with Jeno. Eating together at lunch, reading at the library and doing study dates, soon the most awaited second date happened and this time it’s sweeter than the first, he brought you to your first college party where you really enjoyed yourself dancing and drinking with him. It’s not that you forgot about Jaemin already, you think of him every day and every night but when Jeno is around everything changes. It’s like your mind forgets about the pixie dust, the shells on your shelf from Neverland, how beautiful and magical Neverland is, but when you’re back home and alone in your room, all you think about is Jaemin. And you hate that you miss him, you hate that you can’t see or feel him.

Jeno never made you feel alone.

You are at a party right now, finishing something in your cup when you feel someone hug you from behind and bringing you back to reality. At some point, you thought it was Jaemin because he’s the only guy ever to startle you like that. But it’s Jeno’s arms that caged you this time, “You okay? If you want to go home I can drive you home”

“Yes. Let’s go home” you feel his hot breath brush on your nape and you’re not gonna lie. It made you want him.

“And?” he asks with a very sexy tone like he's trying to tell you something but shy to say it.

“And my parents are not home” you turned around to kiss him.

“That’s my girl” he said excitedly and walk you towards his car.

While you were kissing Jeno inside your room, and removing each other’s clothes until you hit your bed, you were thinking about Jaemin but Jeno is another level of hotness that he can make you forget something. Or maybe that’s because you’ve completely fallen in love with him. It was dark, and all you can see is the silhouette of your body grinding together. You were both in the mood to really get on with it and did not even bother turning your lampshade which made you both giggle, “bummer, I wanted to see you” he whispers and bit the shell of your ear.

Your hands roam around Jeno’s body and even without a light you can see, or feel how hot he is. His hard rock abs were brushing on your tummy while he grinds his body, he reaches both of your hands and put it on top of your head. Experienced, he is very much experienced than you are.

It was an eventful night indeed, and you had a lot of first time with Jeno in just one night. First time fucking from behind, first time giving a blow job, but most importantly, it was your first time having an orgasm using his cock. It took some time, yes, but he was incredibly good in bed.

You stayed under the covers and dozed off together, hands intertwined and bodies together.

Unfortunately, Jaemin heard everything. Because he was hiding inside your closet, with a flower in his hand, ready to surprise you after a very long time of not seeing each other. Normally when he peeks at Mark and his girlfriend having sex he usually gets hard, but now… he felt really heartbroken. Hearing the love of his life moaning because of another man, made him regret that he took being a tooth fairy very seriously. As he sneaks out quietly and effortlessly, he came close to you, kissed you on your forehead, and covered your exposed skin so you won't get cold.

“I’m sorry” he whispers and left with the flower.

Jaemin hid the truth and pretend that he knew nothing about Jeno because he loves you so much that he can’t let you go and face his reality. Meaning, you finally found a human that will love you and will make you feel like a normal person. It’s the ugly truth that he’s not yet ready to admit.

Over the days that he’s been present, he tried so hard on winning you back and making you fall in love with him over again. Even though he’s trying, he can’t help but feel so hopeless whenever he leaves you after a sweet visit so he decided to finally count his days with you, and finally, let you go when he’s ready.

Five months later

“You’ve been really sweet lately. Why?”

It’s a weekend in your world and Jaemin ditched his tooth fairy duties just so he can bring you to a quiet island and watch the stars with you. He hugged you tightly before he tells you half of the truth, “I just want to make you fall in love with me. Again”

“What are you talking about, as far as I know, I’m very much in love with you” truth, but you’re in love with Jeno too, just not that deep like how you love Jaemin.

“You and your sweetness, I love you” he sounds sincere. Very sincere actually, that it bothers you.

“I-I love you too. You’re not telling me something aren’t you?” you were slightly nervous as you sat up from between his legs and face him.

“Mhhm. Caught me red-handed. I have a surprise, turn around” you returned to your previous position and waited for him. After a few seconds, he puts a necklace around your neck and you felt something cold on your skin. A pendant that looks like a tooth, but it’s a pearl, “it looked like a tooth, don’t you think it’s amazing?” it was a parting gift because he was planning to finally give you up and let you be with Jeno.

You were speechless once again, “you’re amazing”

Sometimes listening to your sweet words hurt him. Because he knew you tell it to Jeno too. And he’s not the only man you love, at least not anymore. “Let’s get you home now” to be honest you wanted to stay for a while but he was so eager to bring you home already so you let him.

The fly back home was cold and quiet, something you have never experienced before. There’s something wrong and he’s not telling you. You waited for him to enter your room but he didn’t, and it was the first time he’s not tucking you in bed after a date, he just floats outside your window.

“Goodbye. Sleep well okay”

“Goodbye?” you scoffed, “Jaemin you never said goodbye, it’s always 'see you tomorrow'” by this time you’re mad at him because he’s not telling the truth. And to be honest he didn’t think you were going to notice that which breaks his heart even more because that means you still care about him.

“No- no, don’t be angry-“ he tried to hug you but you pushed him away and you’re not stupid to not realize that he’s breaking up with you tonight. “I-I know about Jeno. But I’m not mad, don’t get me wrong. He’s a great man, I’m happy you found someone, normal” he finally said the truth without breaking into tears and faced it like a man. “We can't be like this forever, someday you will get a job, marry someone, be a mom, grow old. So come on, let’s not part like this”

He was asking for a hug. One last hug, but you asked him to stay. You didn’t feel tears but somehow you’re crying nonstop and sobbing in front of him already, “I will break up with Jeno. Please- Jaemin I’m sorry for hurting you”

“Ssshh. You didn’t do anything wrong. I made up my mind, please don’t make this harder than it is already. Tonight is finally goodbye. Let’s part without regrets, we tried”

You still think that Jaemin is a different kind of special that’s why you can’t let go, and by this time you’re both crying and you were holding him so close that he had to make you let go of him so he could fly away from your window, one last time. Letting Jaemin go is like letting go of something you kept since you’re a little girl, something you’ve own then you lost it unexpectedly.

You didn’t want to say goodbye, but it happened anyway. You weren’t prepared. You never saw this coming.  

27 years old

“Mommy look! My tooth is out!” she showed you a big smile and you kissed your daughter on the forehead.

“Okay- okay, calm down. Daddy will get you ice cream after dinner, keep your tooth safe, please. So you won't disappoint the tooth fairy” she’s excited about the tooth fairy thing too, just like you when you were her age.

Happily married to Jeno and mother of a very curious 6 year old, you managed to move on and live your life without Jaemin and keeping him a secret forever. The heartbreak was an experience that you will never forget but thankfully, Jeno never gave up on you. Jaemin was right, he’s a great man.

When it’s finally bedtime for your daughter, you and Jeno tucked her to bed and made sure that her tooth is under her pillow before she sleeps. “tooth fairies aren’t real right?” he whispered to you after closing the door.

“For me they’re true. Come on, don’t ruin this for her” you playfully smacked your husband and went to your shared bedroom together.

It was really late when you heard something from your daughter’s room and you decided to look into it. Slowly you opened her door, but you see nothing and her window is closed. You checked the guest room quietly and groggily but you woke up when you see someone familiar standing near the window. “Jaemin?” you closed your eyes and opened them again until he turns around and flashes you that beautiful smile.

“Well you look old” is his first few words again to you after not seeing each other for many years.

“And you never aged” it’s like it was only yesterday when he broke up with you, he didn’t change. He’s still young and handsome.

“Fairy. I age but you know, -how are you?” he quickly changed the subject and walked towards you.

“Are you my daughter’s tooth fairy?” he let out a small laugh and held you close, trying so hard to stop himself from telling you how much he missed you and it was hard for him during the years without you.

“Sungchan” he whispered.

“That small fairy?”

“Mhhm. He’s big and tall now, so I’m doing his work for now because he made a sound earlier” that explains the thud you thought.

“I have to go now. You’re happy right?” you nod at him and tears started flowing from your eyes. You felt him let go for the second time but this time your heart is not breaking, or maybe it never actually healed that’s why you can’t feel anything now.

“Can I kiss you” you caught his hand before he flies away and hopes he gives you this one last request.

“No” he rejects you in the nicest way he can and fly away without saying another word. Jaemin respects Jeno and your daughter, even though he wanted to kiss you too he can’t. He can’t be selfish but he’s happy that you still believe in him, and passed the magic to your daughter.

That night, you felt that it is indeed goodbye from now and that is the last time that you will see Jaemin ever again.

The End.  

For Mona,

My first moot before I became close to everyone else. Thank you for accepting me as your partner. I remember we were so happy after we gave Kei our Neoholiday event and then followed by neo’clock which is very successful and we were so happy.

I don’t know but after we finished planning neoclock, I felt like I gained a new friend. And that’s my inspiration when the reader/ you met Jaemin for the first time. The first part was inspired by our first conversation actually, not really based on the messages that we exchanged but if you noticed I didn’t put anything romance related in the 6 years old part. I remember we were exchanging pieces of information about a few movies, princess Mia and I asked where you from.

So that is that WAHAHAHA sorry for ruining the surprise, but I lessen the smut I was overthinking you might get uncomfortable huhuhuhu…. Happy Neoholiday!