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g-xix · 5 months

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Scrambled Egg. Deji x reader x JJ x Simon [platonic]

IDEA: coming home from school w them and the parents aren't there, so you all try cook something. Too bad Deji and JJ try help. Inspired by Deji and JJ'sscrambled eggs in thesidemenSunday.

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"We okay to come 'round to yours, JJ?" Simon turned his head to meet JJ's as he carefully placed his pencil case in his bag. The fabric besides the zipper had a small hole in it and Simon had been treating his bag with the uptmost care recently. JJ didn't seem to care as much, however, as he shoved his chemistry folder into his bag which donned a grand rip in the side.

"Oh yeah, as long as you just don't mind Dej." JJ shrugged, making you and Simon laugh as you all shut your lockers, jamming your lock on the turner and fiddling the code around.

You slung your bag around your shoulder, helping Simon pack his sports kit to hurry him up so that you could get back to JJ's to rush through your homeworks together and then take it in turns to play on JJ's laptop.

Stepping outside, the Winter air was frosty and made you zip your jacket up with a shiver. Noticing your shiver, Simon offered his gloves whilst Deji (who had joined before you'd left the building) plopped his beanie on your head- JJ making the group stop before you walked any further, so that he could properly put the woolly hat on- pushing it down the back of your head and over your ears as well- delivering a good headpat before continuing onwards.

It was a great relief when you all arrived back at JJ's, all letting out contented sighs as JJ opened the front door with a click of the keys and a pushing of the handle- though those greatful expressions were wiped clear off of your faces almsot instantaneously as the bitterly cold air rushed upon you as you stepped in- almost colder than the Wintery air outside.

It had turned dark by the time you'd all walked home to JJ's, and thus it was a struggle for you to trace your fingers across the walls and try find a light switch, having been the first to take your shoes off at the door.

"Here we go," JJ muttered after a moment, flicking the wall before they were painted within the warm white light of an overhead bulb, illuminating the many framed photos of JJ and Deji as children with their parents who all smiled oh so lovingly at a camera.

No matter how many time you'd return to JJ's house, seeing that photo wall would never not bring a stupidly soppy smile to your face.

"He looks like he's just sneezed there," Simon snickered and pointed out one where JJ's eyes were barely open- nose scrunched and face unattractively wide, almost in a perfect o-shape.

"He looks like he's just sat on Dej there-"

"Oh wait-"

"He did." You and Simon chorused and pointed to the picture before which indeed displayed a very pleased JJ sat on a crying, barely-toddler Deji.

"Oh piss off you two," JJ rolled his eyes but couldn't resist the infection grin from growing on his lips also letting out a laugh alongside all of you.

"Oi, JJ, Mummy and Daddy have gone out!" Deji exclaimed from the kitchen, his face popping out from behind the living room door with a chocolate-yoghurt drink to hand, and white ring around his lips.

JJ sighed at the sight of his younger brother. "Bloody hell, I've told you Dej, those chocolate snacks are useless for you- just... Just let me make something... Bloody Hell, I don't know why Mum gets those snacks anyways- they're stupid overpriced!" JJ kept complaining to himself/Deji (it was unsure who he was lecturing) as he walked past Deji and into the kitchen, turning the lights on and opening the fridge which could be heard as the vacuum was broken.

"Dej, are you allowed to cook when your parents aren't at home?" You furrowed your brows and asked the younger of the two siblings. You weren't familiar with whether either of these boys were any talented with a pan and spatula but you had heard a certain whisper of Deji accidentally burning his hand within the first food tech lesson in senior school and him being withdrawn from that class. Permanently.

Deji shrugged in response. "We've never asked."

"Can either of you even cook?" Simon was next to ask, causing Deji to chortle as he shrugged again, smile passing on to Simon as he heard JJ let out a louder shout at himself in the kitchen. "Shall we help him?"

"Well, I don't fancy helping him but it'd be fun to see what's happening over there."

The three of you trooped through the living room and to the kitchen behind, finding JJ with his hands on his head, a look of great stress creased across his face as he shook his head gaze plastered to the floor.

An egg had been dropped over the faux wooden and was slowly trickling further and further out of its shell.

"Mum's gonna be PISSED, you've wasted an egg!" Deji cackled, breaking JJ's trance.

JJ groaned and put his head in his hands, his frustration only making Deji laugh even more raucously- triggering JJ to launch an attack- lurching forwards, hands out as if trying to grab Deji, and subsequently planting his foot straight into the gloopy mess before taking his other leg off the floor with such momentum that he whizzed backwards and landed flat on his back, thumping against the floor and flicking egg-gloop up and onto Deji (who let out a scream) whilst yourself and Simon dodged to avoid JJ who sprawled across the floor with a loud shout.

You couldn't help but bite down on your cheek, resisting the urge to smile whilst JJ's back arched off the floor with a loud cry, Deji shouting about the albumen that'd slung onto his nose.

"You reckon we should help yet?" You turned to ask Simon, the sight of the wide grin on his face tugging the corners of your mouth up also.

"Not yet, I wanna see just who's gonna win this..." Simon watched and you could only nod in agreement... Until you saw Deji reach for an egg of his own.

At that point, you knew that someone had to step in to prevent world war three from starting for another few years.

"DROP THE EGG, DEJI-" You held Deji back from JJ with a hand whilst JJ simply scowled from the floor.

You lived to regret your words however, as Deji took what you said far too literally and loosened his grip over the egg- letting it drop to the floor with a CRACK.

"DEJI" The other three of you exclaimed whilst Deji just looked from one to the other with a look of surprise in his face, as though he were unbelieving that he was the one being targeted.

"Look," Simon decided to step in, only seeing the situation worsening by the second. "We'll clean this mess up, Dej and JJ, you two clean yourselves up, and then we'll try make something."

JJ looked begrudging to the idea of admitting defeat to his idea of cooking something for Deji, but had to shake his head and shrug, saying a reluctant "Okay then", and letting yourself and Simon look at the mess.

It only took about 5 minutes to actually clean the two eggs up, and Deji and JJ had joined you after another minute.

"What can we make?" JJ asked eventually, looking to you for help along with Deji and Simon. After all, you were the only one who took food tech GCSE and was actually good at it.

"I suppose.... Brownies aren't too hard...?"

Well, turned out they were for the Olatunji brothers.

Deji had some strange obsession with cracking eggs, but he couldn't do it very well- and in the end you ended up with a mixture containing four too many eggs, and crunch texture (egg shells. Of course.)

"Deji, we physically cannot cook this. This just can't go into the oven."

"Can we just see what it makes?" Deji furrowed his brows and pleaded.

"Dej, you got banned from food tech and she's doin it for GCSE- if Y/n says that's not going into the oven then that's not going in." Bless JJ for reinforcing your words and plucking the tray from Deji's hands. You noted how the mixture had a strange goopy jiggle to it as JJ dropped it onto the opposite counter.

RING RING RING!

JJ jumped at the sound of the landline phone ringing, rushing to grab the phone and press it to his ear.

Deji, Simon and yourself all watched with interest as he spoke a few words before placing the phone back into the holder and turning around with a horrified expression.

"Mum's fifteen minutes away..." He near-whispered.

Deji's eyes widened as he let out a gasp, Simon and yourself wondering what was so perilous at the news.

"Oh she's gonna be pissed that we've wasted all the eggs and made absolutely fuckall..." JJ's hands found his head, sitting on either side of his face helplessly. You couldn't help but feel pity for the fact him and Deji were so inexplicably futile.

However, after a quiet moment of mourning, JJ picked himself up and clapped his hands, springing into action and a "RIGHT," picking up utensils and tidying the general area.

"We cannot let Mum see the mess we've created, so Deji- you wipe up all the mess on the counter, Simon, could you please wash up the utensils with me?" The two boys nodded in agreement before JJ turned to you with wide brown eyes. "Any other ideas, Y/n?"

"I'm gonna work on getting all the ingredient out of your stove- otherwise when Mrs Olatunji tries to cook she'll set off the fire alarm by burning all that flour."

"Good thinking- thank you- so much," JJ's words almost made you feel sorry for him, and you reached over to collect him in a small hug, squeezing his side and rubbing up and down his arm comfortingly before patting and letting him go. "Don't you worry, JJ, it's been fun enough seeing you mess up as is."

With an eye roll and smile from JJ, you all rushed to do your own bits- scrubbing the spoons, scraping the counters, wiping the stove with a mini-cloth... You were all working at top speeds until Deji looked out the window and yelled-

"MUM AND DAD ARE PULLING IN!"

Thank God you'd finished your cooking, just as JJ gasped and turned around, realising-

"What excuse do we use for the eggs?!"

Everyone went silent in thought including yourself.

JJ looked as though he could've pulled his hair out at that moment, until you had a brain-wave.

"DEJI, get me the last three eggs!"

Deji pulled the last three out and gave them to you so quickly you almost dropped them- meaning that JJ had to cup his hands under yours just to stabilise you and prevent (another) accident from happening. You could feel an almost dangerous warmth radiating from JJ's hands, his anxiety making his whole body heat up. Your hand found his arm, gently pressing in a comforting way your mum used to do to tell you it'll be fine, flashing a sweet smile before getting back to your cooking.

"JJ, Deji, watch-"

You cracked each of the three eggs into a bowl without getting the shell in, whipping it up with a fork whilst Deji and JJ watched over either shoulder. Simon seemed to know what you were doing as he grabbed some salt and pepper and began shaking it into the mixture as you whisked.

"Right, this is the quickest and easiest shit you can make with eggs-" You dashed some oil into a pan Simon had placed over the stove- igniting the gas and pouring the mixture from the bowl to the heating surface as Simon called "They're taking shopping out of the boot!"

"Stall them!" Run out and ask whether they need a hand with getting it all in!" JJ leaned away from your ear to yell at Simon, which Simon duly noted and scurried outside, as indicated by the door shutting and opening.

Meanwhile you kept the boys captivated as Deji handed you a spatula and let you scrape the mixture from the bottom of the pan, forming soft clumps of scrambled egg.

"Chilli peppers?" JJ asked, leaning past you to grab the seasoning from the top shelf.

"Be my guest." You allowed him to sprinkle a few on, still displacing the eggs with the rubbed spatula to keep the eggs forming.

"Hurry up!" Deji hissed nervously as he heard Simon's loud voice and the Dad's voice approaching closer and closer to the front door.

"I can't physically go any quicker! It's bloody cooking, Deji!"

"Yeah, shut up Dej!" JJ reinforced your slightly panicked words, though a bit harshly.

"Sorry Dej, you know we love you..."

"God, I feel like I'm with parents right now..." Deji grumbled, making you roll your eyes as you looked to the left and caught the embarrassed look on JJ's face as well as his darkened cheeks. Cutie.

The sound of the door opening at the front and Yinka's voice calling through the house: "JJ? Deji? We're home!" Was enough to make all three of you jump, however.

"Plate!" You hissed at the two behind you as they panicked to help you.

Simon was no less scared than all three of you- all too knowing what the Olatunji parents looked like when they were angry- and did his best to stall them even in the hallway as they took their shoes off. Not only could Simon feel his arms shaking from the weight of the plastic shopping bags (he'd been given the bag with three heavy milk bottles in it) but also his fingers tremoring in fear of what Yinka and Olajide Snr would see when they walked into the kitchen.

Yet there was only so much which Simon could do as Yinka walked on past him and followed the corridor into the kitchen, Simon rushing his shoes off to trail nervously behind and look over her shoulder as when he walked into the living room, holding his breath as he saw...

JJ, Deji and yourself stood- hands all clasped behind your besides at the table...

On which sat a plate of scrambled egg.

"What's this?!" Yinka exclaimed in surprise.

A porcelain white plate was presented with a raw, untoasted slice of bread beneath yellow curds of egg. The scrambled egg itself looked wonderful: seasoned; sprinkled with paprika and chilli flakes and soft and steaming, clearly fresh from the pan... The sight of all three students stood behind it like army cadets with backs straight and arms behind their backs was a sight to behold though.

Simon wished he had a camera to take a picture of them with. He'd take a picture and frame it so it could be pinned up on the wall besides the stairs alongside all the other pictures of the Olatunji siblings.

"Scrambled eggs!" Deji happily introduced, a great happy smile on his face.

"You cooked without us home?" Their dad entered now, scanning the living room as if looking for a fire or some sort of kitchen disaster. Too bad you'd cleaned the latter before he could've seen it.

"Oh I'm so sorry, Mr Olatunji, Mrs Olatunji, that's my fault," You took credit. You knew Yinka had a slight soft spot for you, and hoped that she would be kinder to you if you took the blame. "We were just all quite hungry and afterwards, JJ and Deji really wanted to make something for yourselves also... I think they said they wanted to surprise you for when you came back..."

You internally fistpumped as Yinka's face broke out into a prideful smile at her sons.

"Did they really?" She was practically beaming with pride. "Oh that is too sweet- I'll tell you what- I'll just go put these into these bits I've bought into the cupboard then have it- thank you very much Y/n...

"What about us?!" Deji exclaimed. JJ elbowed him in the ribs for speaking out of turn.

"Yes, thank you to you and JJ as well," She pressed a kiss to either head as she walked past them and towards the cupboard.

Simon spotted a pan that was still out besides the counter, just behind Yinka. His eyes widened as he squinted his eyes and realised that pan was filled with gloopy, crunchy brownie mixture.

"Dej!" Simon hissed quietly enough for it to go unnoticed by Y/n and JJ (who were exchanging victorious little grins and fistbumps whenever Yinka and Olajide looked away, also helping to put the shopping away). As Simon caught Deji's attention, Simon jerked his head at the pan allowing Deji to spot the mixture and widen his own eyes- rushing towards the metal pan and hiding it as any reasonable person would, by...

Shoving it into the oven.

Simon could've facepalmed at the stupidity of Deji, yet he chose to just display a thumbs up. At least the pan was out of the way; he could take it out and throw it away later.

"Have you kids eaten, yet?" Yinka turned around and asked the cohort as she put the final pack of pretzels onto the bottom shelf before shutting the cabinet.

"Oh yeah, we made some eggs for ourselves, too." JJ reassured his Mum, and you internally smiled as you realised all complications were falling into place and smoothening out. Yes, you'd 'used' those eggs to make yourselves food... Not that you'd dropped two and wasted the other six on gloop-brownies-

Yinka and Olajide sat themselves down at the table with huffs, tucking their chairs in as Simon rushed to pick up a knife and fork for either and joined the line that Deji, JJ, and yourself had created opposite to the parents.

As the knife sliced through the egg and bread, you were all holding onto your breaths- squeezing your hands tightly behind your backs in absolute tension as you waited their response. You could feel JJ almost shaking from besides you, and unclasped your hands- reaching to the right to find his and placing your hand over his. He exchanged a quick glance before turning his palm over to interlink your hands, his fingers tightly squeezing yours whilst you tried to soothe him by rubbing his outer hand with your thumb.

You could practically feel the blush forming on your cheeks from your actions, and yet you were too nervous from the tension to care- everyone in the room was silent, awaiting as the parents raised their forks and knives laden with 5-minte-scrambled-eggs and bread...

The fork entered their mouths...

Five chews...

Hand slackens around fork...

Olajide's eyes go wide...

Yinka begins smiling...

Yinka swallows and gets up...

Yinka begins walking towards you...

"Oh wow, Y/n this is lovely! You said you made this? Wow, you've made it so nicely, thank you very much, kids!"

You could feel your heart swelling as Yinka wrapped her arms around you, one hand resting on the back of your head and pressing you into her body maternally, whilst the other squeezed comfortingly around your back.

JJ and Deji were chuffed as well as they received their own hugs and well-done's, and Simon got a little hug of his own, too.

The four of you raced upstairs after washing their plates and utensils, dancing around JJ's room ecstatically as you realised you'd gotten away with fucking up their kitchen, wasting eggs, and cooking whilst the parents weren't at home.

You may have gone to sleep with empty, cruelly rumbling stomachs, but you also went to sleep with hearts overflowing with pride and joy.

BONUS SCENE!

"Kids!" Your neck snapped back as you heard Yinka's voice calling from downstairs.

"Yes, Mum?" JJ called back down to the kitchen.

"Can you come downstairs please?" Her voice responded, making you all groan as you paused the game, putting the monitor on sleep mode and trooping down the stairs to the kitchen whereby you knew Yinka would be.

You were first to step through the kitchen door and regret it most as you saw that the previous humour and happiness within Yinka had been wiped clean, replaced with a confused and almost horrified look as she wielded a pan in her hand.

"What is this, can you explain to me?"

The mixture inside was burned and charred completely black and somehow still seemed to have a jiggle to it as the tremor in Yinka's hand had the horror wiggling slightly. And not only that, but the whole room smelled of farts because of that "brownie" monstrosity Deji had created, with four-too-many eggs.

You looked to the side to make eye contact with the other three boys who were all partially responsible also, and whilst JJ's eyes were wide in fear, Simon's jaw hanging loose in disbelief...

Deji had taken flight and sprinted out of the kitchen, running two-steps-at-a-time up the stairs whilst Yinka shouted for him to COME BACK DOWN, NOW, DEJI!!!

BONUS BONUS SCENE!!!

(Wow, timejump from secondary school AU all the way to current!Sidemen era!)

You took the camera off of it's tripod, slipping the SD card out and handing it to Kon, handling the camera with upmost care as you slipped it back into it's case and zipped it up post-shoot.

A warm smile remained on your face, only growing bigger as you felt a hand slip around your waist, pulling you into your muscular boyfriend's body.

"Nice scrambled eggs you made there, Jide," You grinned as you turned to see his own grin, dimples cutely pressed in at the corner of his mouth so sweetly you couldn't help but place a chaste little kiss there.

"Learnt it from the best," JJ chased after your lips, wanting a better kiss which you couldn't deny, sharing a quick kiss on the lips before pulling back and laughing.

"God, it's so ironic that after all this time the only thing you've learnt how to make is scrambled eggs..."

You cast a glance to the simple pile of egg amongst eight other well-crafted dishes. It was certainly the odd one out, and yet it also somehow looked like one of the most preferrable meals amongst the others.

"You could teach me how to make something else, you know?"

"Oh yeah?" You quirked a brow and turned back to face him. "And what do you wanna learn to cook?"

"I don't know, what's the easiest."

You cast your memory back to the things you'd make as a child- some of the easiest recipes- until your mind found the item you'd once deemed easiest to make, and yet had watched as JJ and Deji had messed it up to beyond repair.

"Well, I suppose brownies aren't too hard..."

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Ayup everyone. Thought I'd write something kinda unconventional in terms of the fact i feel like i always write fluff/smut/x reader oneshots, but the recent sdmn vid kinda j made me wanna write some platonic fluff, ygm? Vid in question is:

youtube

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