#see! I give points for reading all my tags

[ao3commentoftheday]

This may be silly, but it'd be really cool if you could, like, make a list of common things ao3 users should tag! I have memory problems and tagging is legit a struggle bc of that.

When it comes to what you "should" tag, all that's required are the Ratings, Warnings, Fandoms, and language. Everything else is optional and will depend on your preferences as a writer and how much you care about people finding or avoiding that specific work.

Generally speaking, the things that I find important to tag are:

the character(s) who make a significant appearance in the fic. I judge significance by whether someone who loves that character would be satisfied with the amount of "screen time" that character gets in this specific fic

the ship(s) that make a significant appearance in the fic

plot points that make a significant appearance in the fic

genre or mood that will give readers and idea of the vibe of the fic

I feel like you might be asking specifically about those plot points, or additional tags in general. Honestly, there are so many out there and so many more that are possible that it would be incredibly difficult to create an actual list. (although if anyone has one, please do link it in the notes)

I personally find it easier to just think about what my story has in it and then type things into the tag field and see what autocompletes. I do the same thing when someone writes me an ask about how to tag their work. I look at the description they've provided and start typing key words and their synonyms into the additional tags field to see what pops up.

If you're worried that you might have missed something that someone might search for, you can also leave an author's note asking for suggestions of tags you might have missed. Remember that not all suggestions will be applicable, so take them with a grain of salt.

Specific fandoms can get really specific tags. Like, not everyone is going to need to use The Soulmate Goose of Enforcement, for example. If you see tags like that while you're reading, maybe start a note on your phone or open up a document and just start keeping track of them.

The common ones like Angst and Smut are easy enough to see while you're just bopping around on the Archive, but if you want to get an idea of other tropes and things, then I recommend Fanlore - specifically this page, to start.

[criticallyacclaimedstranger]

My Place or Yours? [Joel x f!reader]

Read on Ao3

Ship: Joel Miller x you/f!reader

Tags/warnings: Reader doesn't like weddings, kissing.

Summary: You're being tortured at a wedding, but there is a man there who saves your evening.

Words: 1,550

A/N: This is written for the Summer Lovin' challenge by @pedgito, who also made the moodboard. I picked the theme 'wedding', which was a weird choice for me because I really hate weddings, but I got Joel to help me get through it. Enjoy!

”I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

Had those magic words only been the end of your misery, this day would have been easy-peasy. But no, you wouldn’t get off the hook that easily. It was only the beginning of an evening filled with awkward speeches, parental tears, and drunk best men giving dubious toasts.

You just don’t do weddings well. Anyone you ever talked to would tell you that it’s because you’ve been burned, because you’re single, ”once you find Mr Right you’ll start to plan your own wedding!”, et cetera, et cetera. Maybe that’s true, but with your disposition, it doesn’t seem likely that you’ll ever understand the point of paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for one single day during which both your parents get to watch you make out after a minister has sprinkled some magic words over the two of you. It’s just not in your nature. You never dreamed about a fairytale wedding when you were little, and you thought your friends would wise up when you got older, but no. As soon as the question was popped, they all reverted back to their childhood selves, and began planning as if for the event of the millennia.

You’ve been to three weddings these last few years, and it doesn’t get any easier. It’s embarrassing, lavish, awkward, and weird. And as always, you’re there without a partner, and must sit there with a fake smile plastered on your face, with no one to bitch to. At least you’re not the only single one at this wedding; that’s happened before, and even if you didn’t mind being single, you were definitely feeling blue when you got home that night.

At least dinner is good. This particular bride isn’t following any fad diets that she’s forcing on everybody, so you’re enjoying a really delicious three course meal. Still, what would a wedding dinner be without interruptions in the form of long, meandering speeches? You are forced to put down your cutlery one too many times, and by the time you’re finishing your delicious medium rare steak, it’s already cold. Chasing leftover sauce with a piece of bread, you nod encouragingly at the waiter asking you if you want more wine. You want to ask them to leave the bottle, but they probably wouldn’t find it funny.

Too tired to make polite conversation, you start to wait for the unofficial break between main course and dessert, when people get up to stretch their legs. It’s your opportunity to get away for a bit. You even have a modus operandi for it: you bum a cigarette from one of the smokers even though you’ve never smoked, go to the side, and pretend to smoke it for as long as you can. If the venue is nice, you then walk around and inspect it. This wedding offers a lot in that aspect: it’s a big house, almost a mansion, in the countryside, with a park and lots of smaller, old buildings on the premises. Perfect for hiding, and then you can just return back to the dining-hall late and blame getting lost.

When the break finally is announced, you let the smokers leave first. By the time they're greedily sucking on their cigarettes, you show up and ask for one. Cigarette in hand, and nod in agreement with the light conversation: yes, it was a beautiful ceremony, yes, the dinner is delicious, yes, the bride is so pretty and the groom so handsome. Eventually, you make a break for it, saying something about wanting to see the premises. So you walk away, flicking away the pillar of ash on your unsmoked cigarette.

The din of the house grows distant as you walk across the yard, shamelessly dropping the cigarette and crushing it with your foot before heading for the garden, quickly as if to escape the disgusting smoke. Once you reach the first, fragrant rose bushes, you start to relax. You find a bench and sink down on it with a relieved sigh. The light breeze smells of oleander, the birds are chirping, and it's pleasantly warm. Perfect.

You dig into your evening bag and check your phone. No messages, of course: most of your friends are at the wedding. Putting the phone away to instead enjoy the garden, you remain seated for a little longer than you know is considered polite. When you finally rise to go back, you notice someone approaching you. A man, around your age, a friend of the groom's, you think, but you've never talked to him.

"Hi," he calls out. "You okay?"

"Sure," you nod easily, "I just needed some air."

"A lot calmer here, isn't it?" He's standing in front of you now, all broad shoulders and narrow hips. Very handsome, but you're feeling defensive, and when your answer delays a little too long, he clears his throat.

"Sorry. Hi." He extends his right hand. "Joel. I'm a friend of Mark's."

You take his hand and give him your name. He doesn't let go immediately after shaking your hand.

"Nice to meet you." That smile. Goddammit, that's a charming smile. When his warm hand finally unclasps yours, you want to reach for it again.

"Can I help you, Joel?" you ask instead, trying to sound unperturbed.

"I saw you leave and wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Why wouldn't I be okay?"

He shrugs lightly, passing a hand over his hair. A curl bounces back to gently lick his forehead.

"You just looked like you weren't maybe having such a good time."

Well, shit. You thought you  had been keeping a straight face, but clearly you had failed. Your gaze flickers, and you clear your throat.

“Don’t tell anyone, but I’m not good at weddings.”

He chuckles low, but not maliciously.

“It shows.”

“Yeah, well, it’s hard to keep a straight face for all these hours,” you snap, a little harsher than intended. Joel holds his hand to his chest.

“Didn’t mean to offend you.”

You shake your head. “Don’t worry. We better get back before they send out a search party.”

“Hey, lemme make it up to you. Can I have the first dance with you?”

Frowning, you eye him, expecting him to be joking. But his gaze is open and honest.

“Sure,” you eventually smile. “Find me when the dancing starts.”

And so it is that after dessert and another couple of meandering speeches, after the bride and groom have danced their first dance, Joel finds you in the crowd. He leads you to the dancefloor with a steady hand, and when he puts his arm around your waist, you don’t mind that his hand comes to a rest a little lower than expected. He keeps eye contact, but not in a creepy way as he makes small talk, asking you about your life more than he talks about his own. He seems genuinely interested in you, and that makes your head swim more than the alcohol.

When the music changes to something more energetic, you pull him to the side.

“Not my cup of tea,” you explain, and he nods, seemingly happy with being off the dancefloor as people begin to shake their asses.

“A drink?”

“Sure.”

He takes you to the bar and you both get drinks. The bride and her bridesmaids are cheering loudly on the dancefloor, and the noise is beginning to wear you down.

“Let’s go out?” you suggest to Joel, who nods.

There are some people scattered around the yard, but the garden is empty. The smell of roses is even stronger now when the hour is late, and you notice that you’re actually enjoying yourself. Joel is so easy to talk to, you’re comfortable in his company, and he makes you laugh.

“Hey,” you finally say. “Thanks for not being weird about me not liking weddings.”

“Why would I be weird about it?” He sounds genuinely surprised.

“Because everybody loves weddings, and I just can’t,” you shrug, but with a hint of desperation in your voice. “And if you don’t like them, then you’re just bitter and probably in need of the right person to have your own wedding with.”

He’s quiet for a moment, sips his drink.

“I know I can keep a secret,” he starts, his voice low, “but can you?”

“I can.”

“I don’t like weddings, either.”

You stare at him for a moment before slapping his arm.

“You could’ve told me earlier!”

He laughs. “I know, I know, I’m sorry!”

“Asshole!” you blurt out, but can’t say more, because Joel’s lips are on yours, and you drop your glass on the gravel where it shatters, splashing liquor over your feet. And you don’t give a single goddamn. Your hands come up to his shoulders, pulling him closer, and you kiss him back, tasting the whiskey on him, a peppery twang from the steak he had earlier, the bristles on his face scratching your skin.

When you finally have to step back to take a breather, he licks his lips and looks at you with heavy-lidded, dreamy eyes.

“Not too soon?”

“No,” you shake your head, “Just perfect.”

He grins. “How soon d’you think it would be polite to leave?”

“I don’t care, we’ve suffered enough. My place or yours?”

[jeankluv]

The forgotten boy - Geto Suguru | Chapter 02

words: 3,9k

summary: He made a deal with the devil, over 1,000 years ago. Just for the sake of his loved ones but the deal came with a condition. Everyone he met from now on, would forget about his existence within minutes, and will be like that for the rest of the eternity

Like that Suguru Geto has lived for the last 1000 years being forgotten but everyone he met, not being remembered by anyone and being alone.

"You remember me?"

You nodded. “Of course I do.” You smiled. “You have been coming here for a few days now. Always at the same hour and always asking for the same coffee.”

tags: angst, fluff, fantasy au, different lifetimes, dual pov, use of y/n, fem!character, modern settings but also past settings, eventual smut, destiny, characters death (in the flashbacks), blood [more tags in the future]

notes: thank you to everyone who liked and commented the first chapter 🫶 this second chapter is from the pov of y/n, some of the scenes that happened in the first chapter will be tell by y/n’s pov but we will also know more about her. Enjoy 💜

Also for those who read my other fic Birdie, the next chapter will be out this weekend. The chapter it’s a bit long so that’s why it’s taking longer.

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You remember seeing him come in on the first day. It had been 10 days since the coffee shop had finally opened and both you and Yuji had been bursting at the seams with work. But you perfectly remember the man's face and sweet smile. You remembered him because in that moment when you saw his eyes, something inside you moved and began to function, as if there had been a piece that had always been missing all your life. And that at that very moment it appeared.

You had tried to get closer to him, there was something that attracted you towards him, as if gravity was pushing you to go towards him. But your hustle and frenetic pace had not allowed you.

On the third, he stayed longer so that’s when you took the courage to go to him. You walked towards him, feeling how your heart was about to come out of your chest at any minute.

“Suguru…”

You shook your head. Why was that coming to you? You kept walking and placed yourself right next to him.

“Do you want more coffee?” You saw the man salthering a bit when you spoke. You were too loud, weren't you? “I have noticed your cup is empty.” You pointed to the cup with a smile, trying to relax your nerves. “You want more?”

The man looked at his empty cup and shook his head. “No, it’s okay.”

What were you doing? He would probably tell you to fuck yourself and never come back there. "But are you sure? It’s in the house, so please accept it.” You smiled.

The man smiled back at you and handed his cup. "Alright." You took the cup between your hands and walked back to the and walked back to the counter.

Yuji immediately noticed your smile and began to pester you with questions. You had known Yuji since you were little, you had gone to school together and you even went to the same college, although different degrees and now there you were once again. You considered him a good friend, although your circle of friends was not even close, you barely knew two of his closest friends and Yuji more of the same with you. But you were grateful that he was your coworker at the coffee shop, he made everything lighter and more entertaining.

You focused your attention back on the coffee. You wanted to be able to make him coffee before the workers from the offices across the street arrived and crowded the establishment, but Yuji started telling you a story and by the time you realized it, the establishment was full and you couldn't leave Yuji alone.

You sighed with resignation and looked back at the table, he was still sitting there, so maybe if the orders were finished quickly you could go to him with his coffee.

“Here you have your order sir!” You smiled giving the last client his order.

You wiped your forehead and turned to make that coffee.

“What are you doing?” Yuji spoke behind you back.

“Preparing this coffee for a client.”

“Which client?”

You turned to look at Yuji and pointed to him. “The one sat on…” He was gone. “He left…”

“There was someone there?” Yuji titled his head.

“Yeah. That cute guy with long black hair and piercings.” Yuji looked at you with confusion. “He comes everyday. I promised him I was going to invite him to a coffee but…” You sighed. “There were too many clients.”

“Well don’t worry, just invite him tomorrow. If he comes back.” Yuji smiled at you.

You nodded and smiled back. That was what you were going to do, you were going to invite him for coffee and maybe try to get to know him better. There was something that made you very curious and you wanted to know more about it.

You spent the next two hours serving customers and clearing tables, until you and Yuji closed. You said goodbye to Yuji upon arriving at the subway stop, as each of you went in opposite directions. You sat in one of the free seats and looked at the views of the city, it was beautiful.

You couldn't stop thinking about the young man in the coffee shop. There was something about him that attracted you so much. You rummaged in your bag and took out an old notebook and a pen and began to draw the silhouette of the young man drinking coffee in the coffee shop. His long, black hair, straight nose, strong jaw and the two earrings, each one in his ear. But then the elegant, almost classic style you could say. They gave it a touch of mystery, timelessness, and intrigue.

Tomorrow you would definitely not miss the opportunity, You would talk to him. Shit you would even take courage and ask for his phone number. Yes, definitely you would do that.

You looked at the drawing, it didn't do justice to how beautiful he looked in person. You closed the notebook when you heard your stop and left the station straight to your house.

Opening the door to your apartment you were greeted by your cat, Blue. You moved to your own apartment after finishing the third year of your career, already three years ago. You used to like sharing dorms but you needed your space.

But the first few weeks you felt lonely, so you adopted Blue, your cat. Blue was still a baby when you adopted her, all her siblings were adopted before her because she was a black cat. But the first moment you saw Blue you knew it was going to be yours. And since then you have been living on your own with Blue.

You sat down on your coach and grabbed your phone from your bag, hoping there would be an email from one of the thousands of jobs applications you sent. But your inbox was the same as yesterday, nothing new.

“Blue.” You looked at your cat, climbing next to you. “Do you think I will be able to work as an artist one day?” Blue purred, stroking her head against your hand. “That’s right, I need to hold some faith, right?” Blue looked at you with those big blue eyes. “And the coffee shop is not that bad. Is great having Yuji with me and you know Blue.” You grabbed her and put her on your lap. “There is a really interesting man coming every single day. Tomorrow I will ask him for his phone number.” You nobbed for yourself .

You laid back with Blue on you and closed your eyes, feeling how sleep was taking over you and the warmth of Blue on top of you helped you to fall asleep in minutes.

˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆

“You think we are soulmates?” You smiled wildly. You were looking at a face, a faceless one. But you could tell it was smiling. A smile that was making your heart flush.

“We are.” The faceless person spoke.

˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆

“Your drawings are exceptional.” Again the faceless person spoke.

“Thank you. But I doubt anyone would be interested in buying them.” You looked at the portrait.

“I would buy them.”

˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆

“It seems I can’t fulfill my promise after all.” You whispered, feeling how your life was coming to your end.

“Please, my love, just hold on.” The faceless person embraced her. “Stay with me. Stay.”

“I’m sorry…”

˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆

You woke up startled and with the heart pumping on your ears. It had been a while since those dreams with that faceless person had occurred. Why did they suddenly come back?

You looked outside the window and you could see that it was already dark, had you slept that long? You hadn't felt it that way. You sat up on the couch and sighed. For years when you were little you had recurring nightmares, so much so that your parents sought help, but found absolutely nothing. When you were about 15 years old those nightmares disappeared or at least they were not as recurring as they used to be and if you had them you did not remember them as vivid as you had felt now.

Your tummy rumbled, letting you know that it was time for dinner. You actually had fallen asleep more than you would have liked. Dragging your feet to the kitchen, you opened the refrigerator and to the surprise of no one's, you just had some apples and an egg carton with only two eggs. You sighed to yourself and closed the refrigerator.

“Should I order something to eat?” You asked for yourself. “Or maybe call Utahime and meet her?”

Blue tilted her head, to which you laughed knowing she couldn’t understand a thing of what you were saying. You rubbed her head and walked to where your phone was, searching for the name of Utahime. You pressed call and waited a bit for your best friend. You knew Utahime would pick up, she always did and if she didn’t it was because an emergency was occurring and she couldn’t answer.

“Hello my beloved!” You heard on the other side of the line.

“Hello my princess!” You replied using the nickname you liked to use for her. “Are you free?” You listened as Utahime hummed on the other end of the line. “Would you like to go to dinner at the new restaurant that has opened near my house? It’s on me."

“Sure!” Utahime replied. “I will be there in like 15 minutes, I was shopping nearby so it won’t take me long.”

“You bought new clothes?”

“Of course I did.” You heard the sound of bags moving. “You will love them, you will see.”

“Can’t wait. I will see you there.”

“Okay, bye!”

“Bye!”

You left your phone on the kitchen table and walked to your room to change. You looked in the closet for a long skirt and a sweater. It was already spring, but the nights were still cold. You put your makeup back on and smiled to yourself in the mirror. You walked to the kitchen and grabbed your cell phone from the table, saying goodbye to Blue.

"Behave well. Mom will be back in a while.” Your cat meowed back and nuzzled your hand with her head.

Leaving your house you walked to the new restaurant that was opened a month ago. You, along with Utahime, Shoko and Yuki, loved meeting up to have dinner or a drink and then go to karaoke. But this week Shoko was full of work at the hospital, putting in non-stop hours and Yuki had traveled abroad again. So today would be a night just for you and Utahime.

You had met Utahime in high school, you were put together for a task and you had become practically neck and neck, later you met Shoko and finally Yuki joined. The four of you had become extremely close, so much so that in class you always ended up in detention for chatting. But to tell the truth, you didn't care at all.

Entering the restaurant you asked for a table for two, luckily you were placed at the tables that had armchairs. Utahime always said that these types of seats were much better than regular chairs, because in the end they left your butt sore.

You looked through the menu while waiting for your friend to arrive. Your mouth was actually watering just looking at the names of the dishes.

“Y/n!” You heard on the entrance. There she was, your best friend, wearing dark sunglasses, although it had been dark for a long time, and a face mask. Many times you wondered if this would draw less attention or attract more attention.

“Hime!” You waved at her and she rushed to sit in front of you. “You really bought!” You said looking at the bags.

“What can I do? I got paid and my heart was screaming.” She made a sad face. “I bought so many cute dresses!” She showed you a blueish dress with a ribbon on the back. “Cute right?”

“It’s just your style.” You smiled.

“I know.” She said excitedly. “But now tell me, how is your job in the new coffee shop going?”

“It’s interesting, I like it.”

“I remember back in college you saying how much you loved going to the old coffee shop that was nearby for the smell of the coffee.”

“And it’s true, the smell is so nice.” You pointed out.

“It’s good to hear you are doing okay.” She grabbed the menu. “And if you want, you can always work for me, I would love to have you on my team. All your paintings are just breathtaking.” She encouraged you.

“I know, but I want to achieve it on my own. But still appreciate your proposal” You sighed.

She nodded and looked back at the menu. “Oh!” She opened her eyes wildly. “Let’s try this!” She pointed at the menu.

“Looks nice.”

“Right?!” She called the waitress and ordered for both of you. “By the way.” You looked at her. “Have you noticed Yuki’s attitude lately?”

“Hmm.” You shook your head. “Something happened to her?”

“I think she is seeing someone.” You opened your eyes in surprise. “Lately she has been glowing so much. Let me tell you something y/n you only get that look when you are in love with someone.”

“Do you for real think Yuki is seeing someone?” Utahime nodded. “What kind of person do you think they are?”

“No idea, but I’m sure Yuki chose correctly.”

The order came and you both thanked the waitress and started eating your dinner.

“By the way.” You spoke, swallowing the piece you just ate. “How was your last date with the guy?”

“Don’t.” Utahime cut you off. “Don’t ever mention that date or that guy. My agency thought it would be a good idea for both of us to go out on a date, and you know get publicity because he is an actor, I’m a singer and you know all that. But ugh, he got on my nerves.”

“Was it that bad?”

“The word bad is too nice to describe it.”

The two of you continued chatting and eating until finally you were only left with the glass of wine on the table. Utahime insisted on going to bars at night now, because you were young and you deserved it. But you reminded her that tomorrow you had to get up early to open the coffee shop and Utahime stopped insisting.

You paid the bill and the two of you left the establishment, although Utahime used to drink and tolerated alcohol well today it seemed that had not been the case, seeing how she moved from one side to the other.

“Stay with me today.” You said grabbing her to which she nodded.

You entered your apartment with Utahime, being greeted by Blue as she always did. You gave Utahime a glass of water and then settled her on your bed. She had really gone too far with the drinks. You smiled when you saw how she was sleeping. She was lucky no one had met her, Utahime was a singer. And a pretty well-known singer to tell the truth. She was discovered by a talent scout years ago and had not stopped working since then.

You lay down next to Utahime and told yourself again that you would achieve your dream on your own. You would make it. You appreciated Utahime's offer but you wanted to do it yourself.

˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆˖✧˖°.✶₊ ⊹ ⋆

You left the note on the table and rushed to the coffee shop. The alarm hadn't gone off and now you were running through the city because you were going to be late. You had to hurry the first hours and the first hours in the morning were always the busiest and you couldn't leave Yuji alone tending the place.

“Just on time.” Yuji smiled, opening the door for you.

“Thank you.” You said trying to catch your breath. “The metro wasn’t very crowded so I was able to make it on time.”

“What happened?”

“I went out with a friend yesterday and the alarm didn’t rang.” You grimaced. “But luckily my biological clock woke me up.” You looked at him and noticed his tired eyes. “Were you playing video games all night again?”

Yuji scratched his head and laughed. “Megumi and I wanted to try a new video game that came out yesterday and we spent all night playing.” He took the apron that was hanging on the coat rack and put it on. “But I'm perfect! Today is going to be a great day right y/n?”

“If you say so.” You smiled at him and also put on the apron.

You turned the sign at the entrance and you and Yuji began to serve the first customers, little by little the coffee shop filled up and before you realized it was packed and you were walking around from one side to the other. Taking orders and serving them. By the time you tried to blink, 3 hours had already passed.

You looked around searching for a specific person in the place. You heart skipped when you saw him again, sat on the same place, wearing a similar outfit and again with the man bun on.

“Who is that coffee for?” You asked Yuji.

“Huh?” He turned the paper around. “It says Kento.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Kento? I don’t know who…”

“I know who he is.” You grabbed the coffee. “I will give it to him. Don’t worry.” Yuji nodded and went back to taking a new order.

You took a deep breath and started walking towards the table where he used to sit. Next to the window. It had good views, you could see the main avenue and how people were hustling from one side to the other. During the days that you had seen him, you had noticed that he used to spend long periods there, reading the newspaper and looking out the window. But always alone. You wondered if he had anyone to share a coffee or a chat with.

Your hands shook the closer you got to the table. You should breathe, just talk to him a little and maybe ask for his number. But without looking crazy.

You cleared your throat before setting the coffee down on the table and smiling at him. “Here.” He looked at you with a surprised look on his face. “I’m sorry for yesterday. I got busy with my coworker Yuji and when I was going to give you your order, you were already gone.” You explained. “That’s why, this one is on me.”

He still didn't say a word. You noticed how he got paler after those words left your lips. Was he okay?

“Is everything okay?” You tilted you head looking at him with curiosity.

“You…” He swallowed, trying to moisten his dry throat. "You remember me?"

You nodded. “Of course I do.” You smiled. “You have been coming here for a few days now. Always at the same hour and always asking for the same coffee.”

Why was he so surprised? You couldn’t understand it but he didn’t look okay.

“You are okay?” You moved closer to him with clear concern on your face.

“I…” He tried to catch his breath, he felt like he was out of breath and in any moment he was going to pass out.

“Hey!” You touched his shoulder and kneeled in front of him. “Tried to follow my breathing okay?” He nodded. And followed your instructions.

“Thank you.” He whispered.

“It’s nothing, but you scared me.” You stood back up. “Kento…”

He looked at you, with a look that you could tell he was confused but then relieved. “Yeah, that’s me… You haven’t told me your name.”

“Y/n.” You said with a smile.

You heard your name being called by Yuji. Shit. Your time was over and you didn’t even get a chance to ask his number but almost gave him a panic attack.

“I’m coming Yuji!” You shouted and turned around to look at him once again. “My coworker is calling me. But stay here as much as you want.”

“I will.” He said your name once again to say goodbye.

“Bye Kento!”

You could die if you heard him pronounce your name one more time. It was so elegant and subtle. You got to Yuji and he looked at you with a face like “what's wrong with you?” to which you tried to ignore him and continue with the work.

Once the clients decreased you started cleaning the area, you needed to be active or you would go absolutely crazy. You heard Yuji talking to someone, so you decided to look over his shoulder. To see Kento in front of the counter talking to Yuji. Instinctively you smiled and stopped what you were doing to go there.

“Oh Kento!” You approached them with a smile.

“Hi.” He whispered only you were able to hear him.

“Y/n, you know him?” The boy wondered.

“Yeah! He comes here every single day, at the same hour and orders the same thing.” You kept on looking at him. “You literally attended to him all these days!”

“Did I?” He titled his head. “I’m sorry I can’t remember.”

“Don’t worry.” He smiled. “A lot of people come here, it’s normal that you don’t remember me.”

“With that face it is hard to forget about you…” You whispered for yourself.

Or maybe it wasn’t for yourself. Shit.

“Oh.” You covered your mouth. “Did I say that out loud?” He nodded. “Sorry! That was very inappropriate! But I think it’s true…You are really handsome and a face like yours is not easy to forget.”

“Thank you. I think you are the first person that has ever told me that.” You nervously looked around, trying to hide somewhere after what you said. You were so stupid. “I wanted to talk with you.” You looked back at him. “If you have time.”

You looked around and nodded. “Yeah, there isn’t a lot of people around, so it’s fine.” You walked to the side, so you wouldn’t disturb the people. “What did you want to talk about?”

“I was wondering when do you finish your shift.”

You opened your mouth, forming an O in surprise. “In…” You thought for a moment. “An hour and a half.”

“Great.” He nodded. “Then I would like to invite you to a coffee, if that’s okay with you of course.”

“I…” You were going crazy, was he asking you out? Oh my god .

“Sorry, I probably made you uncomfortable.”

“No, no it’s not that.” You shook your head. “We can go and grab a coffee without a problem.” That made Kento smile. “But I will have to leave early, I have other things to take care of.” He nodded.

“It’s fine by me.”

“Then… I will see you once my shift is over.”

“Alright.”

Did you have a date? You had a date in less than two hours. You wanted to scream and dance, but you had to behave after all you were at work. Your cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Or by God, what was happening to you, you were really happy.

“Suguru.”

You stopped dead and touched your head, that name and that headache again. What was the name Su… Sug… damn you had forgotten, again.

— comment if you want to be tagged

🏷️: @drownedpoetess @aducksmokingquack @walkingtravesty97 @pdacex @zhenyuuu @n1vi @blendingcaramal @mimiixen @bbyxxm @paprikaquinn @my1fx @alwaysfreakingout @simplysm1le @lavender-hvze

[deedeeznoots]

You’re? Correction! I’m Yours 

Characters: Ryomen Sukuna, GN!Reader 

Word Count: 900+ 

Genre: Fluff

Content: Non-Curse!AU, Nerd!Sukuna, Established Relationship (with some pre-relationship sprinkled in), Swearing

A/N: Shout out to my wonderful mutual @heian-era-housewife for this post about Heian Era Sukuna doing poetry. If she’s reading this: I hope you don’t mind the tag but your post seriously inspired a huge chunk of these headcanons 🥹

Synopsis: Headcanons of all the nerdy things Sukuna does because deep down inside that’s all he is and all he wishes to be ❤️

➺ At first glance he doesn’t read as someone who would be super nerdy or all that interested in learning. 

➺ I mean, can you blame anyone? No one really expects the dude constantly looking for a fight to pull up with some textbooks during his free time.

➺ Once you get to know him though, you realize that on the inside he is in fact a giant nerd about basically everything.

➺ It starts off subtly: at first you’d ask him questions and he’d be able to easily come up with answers without even giving it a second thought.

➺It could be a question about anything, regardless of the subject or perceived difficulty, and Sukuna would be able to explain it to you. Not only that, but he’d be able to explain it to you in a way that made it sound like the simplest thing in the world. 

➺ At one point you basically just started playing trivia and just started asking him stuff normal people didn’t know the answers for and he’d answer with ease, albeit he’d get really annoyed with your constant random questions.

➺ Sometimes if he’s really excited about a subject his explanations would turn into full lectures that’d put most college professors to shame.

➺ Although it was shocking at first, it started to make sense when you realized that the main reason why he takes time to learn about stuff is because he’s constantly bored and looking for new things to entertain him.

➺ He’s good at basically everything so long as it piques his curiosity, but his one and only love will forever be literature, mostly because of how infinite the possibilities are with the medium.

➺ He’s well versed in literature of all genres and different cultures, but he is the most drawn toward Japanese works (and let’s be honest, his favorites would probably come from the Heian Period).

➺ Ever since getting with you, he’s been leaning more toward the romance genre. Just in case he needs any inspiration on how to spice up your relationship, you know? 

➺ He’s taught himself multiple languages just for fun and to see how far he could go.

➺ He LOVES poetry, he both writes and reads it a lot and it’s his favorite hobby besides eating.

➺ Other than literature, he also has a huge fascination with art.

➺ He designed his own tattoos because he wanted to play with the idea of turning his body into a canvas. It also just so happened to make him look intimidating as hell which was a plus in his book.

➺ He also has a little journal that he carries around and he sketches a lot whenever he’s bored or sees something interesting.

➺ As for styles, he’s a really big fan of Sumi-e painting because he’s allergic to color but he basically just uses and does whatever he feels like at the moment. 

➺ He’s the type of person who draws what he sees, but he would especially enjoy drawing nature. 

➺ He would go out on hikes whenever he felt the need to draw and would walk until he found something interesting. 

➺ He’s really into meditation while he draws and he uses sketching as a way to keep himself level headed during particularly annoying days.

➺ He isn’t too fond of drawing people, but you’d be the exception. 

➺ He would 1000% draw you while you sleep. It’s the perfect time since you’d be still for most of it. 

➺ Sukuna is able to write really good cursive and also does calligraphy because he got bored one time (shocker) and so decided to see if he was able to do it well and to no one’s surprise, he was eventually able to.

➺ The reason why he leans towards the humanities so much is because they’re both subjects no one can really “master”. With both art and literature, there isn’t a point where someone knows absolutely everything about either subject. Since Sukuna loves a challenge, he wants to be the first person to go “Fuck you, I DO know everything about this”.

➺ One of the little things he does every day includes writing you short little romantic poems on a post it note and leaving them in out random spots for you to find. 

➺ Sometimes they would be in your pocket or other times on the bathroom mirror, wherever it is they would make you smile. 

➺ Though, sometimes he would stick them onto such odd spots that you’d wonder just how he did it?

➺ He has TONS of pride in his writing (to be fair, he’s prideful about basically anything he does) and he always appreciates it when you mention his little notes and complement the work he put into writing them.

➺ Sometimes when the both of you are talking together he’d say some of the most poetic sentences that you’ve ever heard like it’s nothing. 

➺ When you gasp he just goes “What? Why are you staring at me like that?” as if he didn’t randomly drop lines that sounded like they came from straight out of a novel.

➺ He’s a dick when it comes to spelling and grammar, especially during petty arguments.

➺ “How many times do I have to tell you, if your going to the restroom put the damn seat down afterwards” ➺ “It’s YOU’RE*, actually” ➺ “Fine, YOU'RE** a piece of shit Ryomen!”

➺ Don’t fret though, because while Ryomen Sukuna wants to know anything and everything there is to know about the world, he knows deep down inside that the best thing the world could have ever offered him was you.

A/N: Everyone list what you think Sukuna’s favorite book(s) would be 🗣️

A/N: If you enjoyed my thoughts on Sukuna, you’d love this story I also wrote paired with some headcanons! 

[maoam]

I guess I'll tag @sasukesun since this post is addressed to her as well. Anyway, how are you addressing me yet not tagging me (I assume I'm still blocked) and I only got this through another person? You're just being hostile.

I have said multiple times Sasuke isn't girly. Neither is Naruto. You put words in my mouth. His feminity comes from his looks (because that's Kishi's type) and the yin/yang. Sasuke is very neutral in the way he dresses, rather rude in the way he speaks to people (compared to how Japanese generally speak) and definitely not a weak doormat like Hinata. I have addressed all these things multiple times.

Sarada and Boruto's relationship doesn't parallel NaruSasu, if you read Boruto manga you would know that. Sarada is very passive when compared to Naruto. She just asks Sasuke to help Boruto. Can you imagine Naruto doing that? Naruto would help Sasuke by himself, that's how Kishi would write it. He wouldn't write Naruto to sat on his ass and wait for things to happen like he is writing both Sarada and Sumire do. People constantly complain about Sarada being rather irrelevant and it's true.

When I say "dynamic" I'm referring to the fact Minato is the only one who bothered to try to save Kushina and the only one who didn't give up on her. My point was about TROPES Kishimoto likes [link]. And why are you ignoring I pointed out Kishimoto paralleld Boruto to young Naruto, Sasuke to Kushina, and Naruto to Minato in the Boruto movie where they were coparenting Boruto? And again, it's about a trope. It's not complicated. Here is another post I made about similar tropes in both ships [link].

Same with Mario/Saori. Funny how you keep ignoring the latter despite me writing posts about that as well. [link] Can you seriously look me in the eyes and deny the similar tropes? Oh hey here's another [link].

I also made a post pointing out the similarities in how Hinata feels towards Naruto and how Naruto feels towards Sasuke but of course you ignore that because it doesn't fit your narrative about me. [link] If it was like you said, I would have ignored this as well. I also made another in reverse, about similarities in how Hinata feels towards Naruto and how Sasuke feels towards Naruto. [link]

The examples of Oro, Obito and Kabuto, are all about them making Sasuke their possession. And when you add the weird imagery, which Kishi never uses anywhere else, and Oro's comments about Sasuke's beautiful face and body, it's not rocket science to understand what's going on. Notice how I didn't mention Itachi, because despite Itachi wanting to control Sasuke, I never saw 'that type' of thing there. And trust me, I would point it out if there was, it wouldn't make me uncomfortable.

You call me a weirdo and stupid so I feel I have to reply to all this.

"I just express my opinion and if you don't agree you can always block me" I guess this is more directed at sasukesun but can't this apply to you as well? I mean you block and unblock me because you don't want me to see your replies and respond, but you still want to call me stupid and other names. It's just not cool dude...

Also this is you so I'm pretty sure you are the one mad that I'm not raving about girly twink Naruto and masculine buff alpha Sasuke aren't you? Lol. I'm sure my posts about Naruto being a rascal punk who gives people the middle finger and farts in his opponent's face kill that little princess image for you.

[14carrotghoul]

WIP Wednesday

It's been a long time but I'm finally done with travel for a bit AND I have finally brainstormed an ending for my cheating fic sequel!!!!

Thanks a million to @suseagull04 @cha-melodius @cricketnationrise @alasse9 @welcometololaland @firenati0n and whoever else has tagged me recently but have gotten buried in my notes over the last couple weeks 😭😭

Here is a meaty lil excerpt from an interview between June and Henry! I'm running out of sections that don't give away plot but I'm free to do a lot more writing now!!! So fingers crossed I finally post in July!!!

Q: You once said that the characters that are fan favorites happened to be the ones you infused with your traits. How have you found the experience of writing yourself and what response are you anticipating considering fan reactions in the past?

A: Oh, it was horrible writing myself. I'm glad I did it, but it was extraordinarily difficult for me.

I didn't mean for or expect readers to latch onto those specific characters. In early drafts, they felt flat and I thought giving them my flaws would round them out in a way that served the story: James’ self-destruction and self-hatred; Ollie's sensitive and vulnerable nature; Adam’s tendency to put up emotional walls. Ollie, in particular, was such a gentle and important character, and as a writer, I understood that his greatest flaw was also his greatest strength; I just couldn't accept the same about myself.

Writing my own character and confronting my importance felt like walking naked into a town square. I couldn't hide any part of myself without feeling like I was betraying all of the hard work it took to get to this point, but I so desperately wanted to cover up the parts that brought me most shame.

In fact, I'd love nothing more than to edit out this question, but my loved ones would be proud to hear me say this.

I began rooting for me once my voice was put on paper. When I externalized everything and saw Henry as a character in a story, I wanted better for him, same as I would for any character enduring difficult circumstances. I hadn't realized how unfair I was being to myself, and I don't want to treat myself that way anymore.

Anyway, I'm cautiously optimistic about the readers’ opinions. I also think I'm better equipped than I've ever been to handle criticism. We'll see in March, I suppose.

Tagging @read-and-write- @happiness-of-the-pursuit @sherryvalli @inexplicablymine @caterpills @dumbpeachjuice @firenati0n @heysweetheart-writes @myheartalivewrites @xthelastknownsurvivorx and any other lovely people that I'm forgetting! I have like one brain cell rn thanks to sleep deprivation 🤪

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

Closed Position: Teaser

Good afternoon/evening my lovelies! I come to you today with a teaser for Week 4 (Part 2) of Closed Position. 😏

As previously mentioned, Alec’s major fuck up happens in this chapter. It’s pretty bad and Kat has some seriously mixed feelings about the whole thing (hurt, anger, relief). She also gets some interesting news from Dieter, which requires her to make a pretty big decision that she knows will have major implications for the two of them going forward. What happens with Alec has a heavy influence on that decision. What could it be? 🧐

Now, given that Alec has ruined things…that means Dieter and Kat will be taking the flirting up a notch or two. Dieter doesn’t even realize Alec is out of the picture at this point, I might add. He’s just going with the flow.

As you can see, the Instagram shenanigans continue. Kat is totally sliding into Dieter’s DMs.

What could Dieter be working on now? Who do we really think his inspiration is (we all know obviously 🤭). And what inappropriate hint is Kat going to give? Will it be inappropriate enough for Dieter? So many questions….😂

Speaking of inappropriate Instagram shenanigans, here is a little teaser for the Week 5 chapter(s). Dieter decides to try and get Kat’s attention too.

Now y’all can come yell at me for being such a fucking tease. I’m not sorry. 😂

Enjoy!

💜Mysty

Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble. 

Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo. 

Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.

👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence, past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.

CP Tags: @titlee78 @legendary-pink-dot  @survivingandenduring @wannab-urs  @harriedandharassed

@hisandsnakes  @misstokyo7love @readingiskeepingmegoing  @runningmom94  @sin-djarin

@cakipy-blog  @missladym1981  @guelyury  @weho2kcmo  @alokaerza  

@girlofchaos  @trulybetty  @rhoorl  @bitchwitch1981  @madnessofadaydreamer

@darkheartgatita  @jazzloveslatte  @timpletance  @musings-of-a-rose  @samiamproductions

@myloveistoolittle  @for-a-longlongtime   @copperhalfcent  @auteurdelabre @drewharrisonwriter

@burntheedges  @stevie75  @bunniboo0015  @quicax3  @jackie923

@sherala007  @pastelnap  @angelofsmalldeath-codeine  @jessthebaker  @rebel-held

@gwendibleywrites  @senorabond  @annalovesflorida  @sandaltoesocks  @katw474

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: ghosttotheparty! @ghosttotheparty has 72 fics in the Stranger Things fandom and 61 of them are in the Steddie tag!

@estrellami-1 or anonymous nominator recommends the following works by @ghosttotheparty:

love me softly

a mess of holy things

pretty girls (series)

hideout

fate

"This author has captivated me from day one. I’ve since gone back and read and re-read everything they have in fandoms that I am a part of, and I’m highly considering reading everything, regardless of fandom!" -- @estrellami-1

They also had this to say: "It was so hard to just pick five fics—I’d easily pick all of them if I could!! These five are just a few of their fics that I come back to, time and time again. This author’s way with words is absolutely stunning, and I want to be like them when I grow up! 😉" -- @estrellami-1

Below the cut, @ghosttotheparty answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

I honestly just adore them so much. Characters that are opposites have always been something I’ve loved; Nico di Angelo and Will Solace are the first to come to mind. I’ve loved them since middle school (I’m in my third year of uni now), and I’ve apparently drawn some connections between their dynamics and Steddie’s. I also feel like Steddie just has so much potential in regards to different dynamics. There are so many alternate universes in which they’re entirely different from the way they are in the original show but there is still a consensus within the community of what kind of people they are and how they behave, speak, or interact. Despite writing the same characters over and over and over, I’ve had so much fun being able to experiment with different personalities and dynamics.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

I think everyone knows at this point that I lovelovelove hurt/comfort. Physical injury and wounds, nursing the other back to health, trauma recovery, nightmares or flashbacks, sub/dom drop, panic attacks or breakdowns, give me all of it. (Bonus points if this is pre-relationship and the comforter calls the other a pet name (cough baby cough) for the first time in the midst of it all. God.)

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

See above. In all honesty, I love intensity. Heavy emotions like grief and anguish and rage are my fucking thing, and I think most of my longer fics involve at least one heavy scene with a panic attack or emotional breakdown. Something about the release and expression of emotions followed by tender patience and sweet comfort is just so cathartic for me.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

I write more fics than there are fics that I read, unfortunately, but the first fic to come to mind was in my life by mourningshowers (@keycarabiner on tumblr). Sososo sweet and tender. It ripped me apart and then stitched me back together and gave me a lollipop as a treat. I also adore the series The Rush of Thunder (That Brings You Under) by callmejude (@callmejude on tumblr). The pacing and characterisation and dialogue were fucking phenomenal. Print this whole series out and bury me with it when I go.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

I have a few AUs that I haven’t actually explored quite yet; one involves teacher!Steve and another is about punk!Stobin (platonic, Obviously), and yet another involves artist!Eddie. But more generally speaking I would like to explore some heavier themes in the future when I have the guts.

What is your writing process like?

Good question. I have no idea. I write pretty much every night, usually with Youtube or Netflix on next to me (typically playing things I’ve already seen so I don’t have to pay full attention to follow along, but my main go-tos are documentaries/docuseries), and I tend to just get as much out as I can. I write most linearly; I tend to not skip ahead and go back, but occasionally I’ll have an idea for a scene that I need to scribble out to make sure I don’t forget it. But my plotlines and focus points tend to shift as I’m writing, so sometimes these scenes end up changing as well.

Do you have any writing quirks?

I hadn’t noticed any, but Bee (@jewishrat420) pointed some out to me: - I consistently use the word ‘press’ - I phrase actions in lists with commas and a finalising and. - I tend to have repeating themes (for example, warm and cold and the quiet journey a character makes from their loneliness to the warmth of someone else). I’ve also noticed that I really like writing visceral imagery; even in fics for other ships I’ve mentioned one character longing to claw open their partner and climb inside them. I love bloody imagery, which Steddie are perfect for.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

If I’m uploading a fic with multiple chapters, I generally try to stay ahead of my posting schedule with at least one to two chapters already written in advance of posting. For my current wip, though, I’ve decided to post only when it’s complete, and to post on a schedule just in case I get behind or lose track.

Which fic are you most proud of?

Probably a mess of holy things.

How did you get the idea for a mess of holy things?

Ah, my love. The inspiration for this fic came from dirty paws by inifiniteorangepeel (@infinite-orangepeel on tumblr). Her version of Steve had me by the fucking throat, and I genuinely could not stop thinking about him even though I think this was before she even started uploading actual parts of the fic. I knew that I wanted to write some kind of religiously traumatised Steve, naive and curious about Eddie fucking Munson, and the haze of an idea snowballed into whatever this fic became.

When writing a mess of holy things, what was something you didn’t expect?

Honestly, I wasn’t expecting how confrontational it would feel. I was raised Catholic, and I put Steve’s parents in a category of religious people that I’ve never really known well. I was never forced to go to church or Sunday school (in fact, I think I only went to Sunday school for, like, three weeks), and for the most part as a child, my relationship with God was amicable. My abuela was very religious when I was young (my mother likes to say, “She was more Catholic than the Pope”), but I never felt as though her faith impeded upon my own life. She would tell me that my artistic skill was a gift from God, and she would pray over me when I had tummy aches, and even though I wasn’t very faithful, I found comfort in it. I also have always found a peace in holy buildings; churches and church graveyards are some of my favourite places to just sit in silence. So I wasn’t expecting the emotional whiplash writing holy things gave me. Writing from Steve’s point of view at first felt like writing fantasy, making it up as I went because I couldn’t write from experience; I have healthy relationships with both my parents, and even though my father had a very difficult childhood, he’s done everything he could to be a good father to me and my brother, so Steve’s father was entirely made up. It wasn’t until I got further along in the fic that I actually realised how big an impact even a slightly religious upbringing had on me as a queer person. My parents never taught me anything hateful, never complained about anybody in regards to God, but somehow this general religious disapproval latched itself to my ribcage, and I hadn’t realised I’d been carrying it around with me my whole life. And I was forced to confront it, along with the distrust that I’d inadvertently developed toward religious people.

What inspired love me softly?

My darling!! This fic started as a random one-shot about Eddie bitching to Gareth about having a crush on a normie, but the feedback was so lovely I decided to write another part. And then another. And then another. At some point the vague idea of a plot appeared, and this universe became very dear to me. I still have ideas for follow-up one-shots, which I keep in a collection on AO3. I think this fic is also what started my love for Tommy Hagan, who I’ve since claimed as an OC. He’s mine now.

What was your favorite part to write from hideout series?

While I was writing this series, I found that I love secret relationships. The idea of Steve having something in his life that he could turn to for some sense of normalcy despite everything in his life literally being straight out of a science-fiction movie was something I loved, and writing the majority of it from an outsider point of view was a fun experiment/exercise.

How do/did you feel writing fate (series)?

Oh, GOD. I love angst. I had the idea for Eddie’s death, specifically him singing the Tennessee Waltz and the whole “Do you think God’ll let me in?” thing, and I worked from there. I actually considered leaving the fic at Eddie’s death, but as much as I love angst, I also love happy and hopeful endings. Even though my heart hurt the entire time I wrote this whole series, I loved it all. Wayne’s point of view was a fun (ish) shift in perspectives and I’ve since included sections in his point of view because I love him so much. (I do also have a one-shot specifically about him living in my head, but I have yet to put it into words.)

What was the most difficult part of writing pretty girls (series)?

I don’t know if I would really consider it difficult, but it did require some actual thinking to write Steve as transfemme, or genderqueer in the opposite direction as me. To take my own experiences and feelings and shift them so they’re upside down was definitely interesting.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

This is from one of my less known fics, spill my guts: “And I’m so fucking high right now, but Steve, I— I think I love you.” It just feels so representative of Steddie as a whole. (Honestly the whole scene kind of feels very Them: both of them high out of their minds and suddenly confessing their undying love in the most dramatic fucking way possible. Ugh. I love them.)

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

I’m working right now on a fic that involves priest’s son!Steve and recovering addict!Eddie, and that’s all I’ll say on that <3

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Not entirely relevant, but I make playlists and pinboards for almost all my fics (if I don’t have one of either for a fic that you’d like one for, literally just hit me up and I’ll put one together); here are the ones I made for Steve & Eddie <3 S - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3dW3wTo8nD11RuqKs9aj52?si=9f98f4a287394152 https://www.pinterest.co.uk/ghosttotheparty/king-steve/ E - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4eWRFi07VIEKIoeaGwfFI5?si=791fa1f2dd6a4f7e https://www.pinterest.co.uk/ghosttotheparty/eddie-the-banished/

Thank you to our author, @ghosttotheparty, and our nominator, @estrellami-1! See more of @ghosttotheparty's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[imperatorrrrr]

mayhaps, you're wondering, "hey T, who are you rooting for in the 'yoffs anyhow?"

well...

Carolina Hurricanes v. New York Islanders - New York Islanders. They are an acceptable Metro team, and we can all agree the Rags suck, which is a massive plus point in my eyes. And I mean, why in the world would I ever root for the Canes. I'm a Devils fan, let's be serious for a moment.

Boston Bruins v. Toronto Maple Leafs - Boston Bruins. Look, the Bruins are in my top three most hated teams, and the Leafs are in the following tier. To me the Leafs are just Canada's Yankees. AM34 is just another Derek Jeter variant. If it wasn't made clear, I am a Mets fan, and I've been a Mets fan longer than I've been a Devils fan and I've been a Devils fan for over two decades. You'd think given that logic, I'd choose the team I hated less, which would be the Leafs, but nope. I mean, I want to pick neither. I would rather pick neither. Don't ask me to explain my brain. It is what it is.

Florida Panthers v. Tampa Bay Lightning - Florida Panthers. This is almost purely because I've been Catspilled by the Discord. Do you understand how much I viscerally disliked the Panthers up until mere months ago. I still don't actually like them, but I wouldn't be upset if they won, so there. Sigh. Thanks, I hate it. Another match up where I'd rather have neither. Another matchup of hated teams.

New York Rangers v. Washington Capitals - Washington Capitals. For one series only, I am a Caps believer. When I tell you, I dislike the Caps so heavily, so so so deeply. Its so historic. But you know what team I hate the most ever because they're cops...the Rags. So this is actually so incredibly straightforward. Anyone but the Rags is the policy here on imperatorrrrr dot tumblr dot com. The East is mostly just unwatchable for me and mostly just filled with matchups of teams I hate.

Winnipeg Jets v. Colorado Avalanche - Colorado Avalanche. This is easy. Fuck the Jets. I like the Avs.

Vancouver Canucks v. Nashville Predators - Vancouver Canucks. This is the team I am rooting for to go all the way. This is the team I have transferred all of my Devils emotions onto. This is the team that I have chosen. Fun fact tho! I actually wouldn't be entirely mad about the Preds making it either, but the Nuckies are my playoff team. They're also like my third favorite team, so.

Dallas Stars v. Vegas Golden Knights - Dallas Stars. Like I think I'm in the pipeline to become a full fledged Stars fan, but I'm not completely there yet, ya feel? In the meantime tho, definitely rooting for them against Vegas. Here's the thing, fuck Vegas right. Like fuck 'em. Here's policy numero dos here on imperatorrrrr dot tumblr dot come: anyone but the Knights.

Edmonton Oilers v. Los Angeles Kings - Los Angeles Kings. Another lesser of two evils situation here. Kings dislike is historic as in 2012 Stanley Cup Playoffs historic right. Oilers hatred is more visceral? More of the moment? I'm softening on my Kings historic dislike. I mean look at me, I'm rooting for the Avs. Do you understand that any Devils fan worth their salt in the early 2000s absolutely did not like the Avs? And look at me now! So yeah, this is mostly I don't want the Oils to win, so the Kings it is! Oh, here's a west coast matchup of hated teams. Some variety in the mix!

there you have it folks! a rooting summary for Round One for those interested!

[bitegore]

Zionists want you to conflate Judaism and Zionism. Zionists want you to believe that Judaism cannot exist without Zionism and that all Jews are Zionists. Zionism would have Jews believe that a Jewish state is the only way that they can be safe from antisemitism and will point to any instance of antisemitism as proof that Zionism is the solution- so Zionism wants gentiles to be antisemitic in their support of Palestine. They want you to conflate all Jews with Zionism and the state of Israel, and they want you to treat all Jews regardless of political affiliation as the face of Israel. Antizionist Jews exist, and incidences of antisemitism ostensibly acting against Zionism will not help dismantle the forces propping Zionism up.

Don't do their work for them.

[insertsomthinawesome]

@priellan COME GET THE BOY!!! ✨

Some different ideas for how that could go down >:D And me picking something personally self indulgent again asdlfjsdLJSDGLDSJG I wanna see him with a Tangled rapunzel length hair braid... it would be so pretty...

[demigod-of-the-agni]

Spider-Man India, but... where from India?

A SUPER long post featuring talks of: cultural identity, characterisation, the caste system, and what makes Spider-Man Spider-Man.

I’m prefacing this by saying that I am a second-generation immigrant. I was born in Australia, but my cultural background is from South India. My experiences with what it means to be “Indian” is going to be very different from the experiences of those who are born and brought up in India.

If you, reader, want to add anything, please reblog and add your thoughts. This is meant to be a post open for discussion — the more interaction we get, the better we become aware of these nuances.

So I made this poll asking folks to pick a region of India where I would draw Pavitr Prabhakar in their cultural wear. This idea had been on my mind for a long while now, as I had been inspired by Annie Hazarika’s Northeastern Spidey artwork in the wake of ATSV’s release, but never got the time to actually do it until now. I wanted to get a little interactive and made the poll so I could have people choose which of the different regions — North, Northeast, Central, East, West, South — to do first.

The outcome was not what I expected. As you can see, out of 83 votes:

THE RESULTS

South India takes up almost half of all votes (44.6%), followed by Northeast and Central (both 14.5%) and then East (13.3%). In all my life growing up, support towards or even just the awareness of South India was pretty low. Despite this being a very contained poll, why would nearly half of all voters pick South India in favour of other popular choices like Central or North India?

Then I thought about the layout of the poll: Title, Options, Context.

Title: "Tell us who you want to see…"

Options: North, Northeast, Central, East, West, South

Context: I want to make art of the boy again

At first I thought: ah geez. this is my fault. I didn't make the poll clear enough. do they think I want them to figure out where Pavitr came from? That's not what I wanted, maybe I should have added the context before the options.

Then I thought: ah geez. is it my fault for people not reading the entire damn thing before clicking a button? That's pretty stupid.

But regardless, the thought did prompt a line of thinking I know many of us desi folk have been considering since Spider-Man India was first conceived — or, at least, since the announcement that he was going to appear in ATSV. Hell, even I thought of it:

Where did Spider-Man India come from?

FROM A CULTURALLY DIVERSE INDIA

As we know, India is so culturally diverse, and no doubt ATSV creators had to take that into account. Because the ORIGINAL Spider-Man India came from Mumbai — most likely because Mumbai and Manhattan both started with the same letter.

But going beyond that, it’s also because Mumbai is one of the most recognisable cities in India - it’s also known as Bombay. It’s where Bollywood films are shot. It’s where superstar Hindi actors and actresses show up. Mumbai is synonymous with India in that regard, because the easiest way Western countries can interact with Indian culture is through BOLLYWOOD, through HINDI FILMS, through MUMBAI. Suddenly, India is Mumbai, India is a Hindi-only country, India is just this isolated thing we see through an infinitely narrow lens.

We’ve gotten a little better in recent years, but boy I will tell you how uncomfortable I’ve gotten when people (yes, even desi people) come up to me and tell me, Oh, you’re Indian right? Can you speak Hindi? Why don’t you speak Hindi? You’re not Indian if you don’t speak Hindi, that’s India’s national language!

I have been — still am — so afraid of telling people that I don’t speak Hindi, that I’m Tamil, that I don’t care that Hindi is India’s “national” language (it’s an administrative language, Kavin, get your fucking facts right). It’s weird, it’s isolating, and it has made me feel like I wasn’t “Indian” enough to be accepted into the group of “Indian” people.

So I am thankful that ATSV went out of their way to integrate as much variety of Indian culture into the Mumbattan sequence. Maybe that way, the younger generation of desi folk won’t feel so isolated, and that younger Western people will be more open to learning about all these cultural differences within such a vast country.

BUT WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH SPIDER-MAN INDIA?

Everything, actually. There’s a thing called supremacy. You might have heard of it. We all engaged with it at some point, and if you are Indian, no matter where you live, it is inescapable.

It happens the moment you are born — who your family is, where you are born, the language you speak, the colour of your skin; these will be bound to you for life, and it is nigh impossible to break down the stereotypes associated with them.

Certain ethnic groups will be more favourable than others (Centrals, and thus their cultures, will always be favoured over than Souths, as an example) and the same can be said for social groups (Brahmins are more likely to secure influential roles in politics or other areas like priesthood, while the lowers castes, especially Dalits, aren’t even given the decency of respect). Don’t even get me started on colourism, where obviously those of fairer skin will win the lottery while those of darker skin aren’t given the time of day. It’s even worse when morality ties into it — “lighter skinned Indians, like Brahmins, embody good qualities like justice and wisdom”, “dark skinned Indians are cunning and poor, they are untrustworthy”. It’s fucking nuts.

This means, of course, you have a billion people trying to make themselves heard in a system that tries to crush everyone who is not privileged. It only makes sense that people want to elevate themselves and break free from a society that refuses to acknowledge them. These frustrations manifest outwardly, like in protests, but other times — most times — it goes unheard, quietly shaping your way of life, your way of thinking. It becomes a fundamental part of you, and it can go unacknowledged for generations.

So when you have a character like Pavitr Prabhakar enter the scene, people immediately latch onto him and start asking questions many Western audiences don’t even consider. Who is he? What food does he eat? What does he do on Fridays? What’s his family like, his community? All these questions pop up, because, amidst all this turmoil going on in the background, you want a mainstream popular character to be like you, who knows your way of life so intimately, that he may as well be a part of your community.

BUT THAT'S THE THING — HE'S FICTIONAL

I am guilty of this. In fact, I’ve flaunted in numerous posts how I think he’s the perfect Tamil boy, how he dances bharatanatyam, how he does all these Tamil things that no one will understand except myself. All these niche things that only I, and maybe a few others, will understand.

I’ve seen other people do it, too. I’ve seen people geek out over his dark brown skin, his kalari dhoti, how he fights so effortlessly in the kalaripayattu martial arts style. I’ve seen people write him as Malayali, as Hindi, as every kind of Indian person imaginable.

I’ve also seen him be written where he’s subjected to typical Indian and broader Asian stereotypes. You know the ones I’m so fond of calling out. The thing is, I’ve seen so much of Pavitr being presented in so many different ways, and I worry how the rest of the desi folk will take it. 

You finally have a character who could be you, but now he’s someone else’s plaything. Your entire life is shaped by what you can and can’t do simply because you were born to an Indian family, and here’s the one person who could represent you now at the mercy of someone else’s whims. He’s off living a life that is so distant from yours, you can hardly recognise him.

It shouldn’t hurt as much as it does, yeah? But, again, you’re looking at it from that infinitely narrow lens Westerners use to look at India from Bollywood.

AND PAVITR PRABHAKAR DOESN'T LIVE IN INDIA

He lives in Mumbattan. He lives in a made-up, fictional world that doesn’t follow the way of life of our world. He lives in a city where Mumbai and Manhattan got fucking squashed together. There are so many memes about colonialism right there. Mumbattan isn’t real! Spider-Man India isn’t real!! He’s just a dude!! The logic of our world doesn’t apply to him!!!

“But his surname originates from ______” okay but does that matter?

“But he’s wearing a kalari dhoti so surely he’s ______” okay but does that matter?

“But his skin colour is darker so he must be ______” okay but does that matter?

“But he lives in Mumbai so he must be ______” okay but does that matter?

I sound insensitive and brash and annoying and it looks like I’m yapping just for the sake of riling you up, so direct that little burst of anger you got there at me, and keep reading.

Listen. I’m going to ask you a question that I’ve asked myself a million times over. I want you to answer honestly. I want you to ask this question to yourself and answer honestly:

Are you trying to convince me on who Pavitr Prabhakar should be?

... but why shouldn't i?

I’ll tell you this again — I did the same thing. You’re not at fault for this, but I want you to just...have a little think over. Just a little moment of self-reflection, to think about why you are so intent on boxing this guy.

It took me a while to reorganise my thinking and how to best approach a character like Pavitr, so I will give you all the time you need as well as a little springboard to focus your thoughts on.

SPIDER-MAN (INDIA) IS JUST A MASK

“What I like about the costume is that anybody reading Spider-Man in any part of the world can imagine that they themselves are under the costume. And that’s a good thing.”

Stan Lee said that. Remember how he was so intent on making sure that everybody got the idea that Spider-Man as an entity is fundamentally broken without Peter Parker there to put on the suit and save the day? That ultimately it was the person beneath the mask, no matter who they were, that mattered most?

Spider-Man India is no less different. You can argue with me that Peter Parker!Spidey is supposed to represent working class struggles in the face of leering corporate entities who endanger the regular folk like us, and so Pavitr Prabhakar should also function the same way. Pavitr should also be a working class guy of this specific social standing fighting people of this other social standing.

But that takes away the authenticity of Spider-Man India. Looking at him through the Peter Parker lens forces you to look at him through the Western lens, and it significantly lessens what you can do with the character — suddenly, it’s a fight to be heard, to be seen, to be recognised. It’s yelling over each other that Pavitr Prabhakar is this ethnicity, is that caste, this or that, this or that, this or that.

There’s a reason why he’s called Spider-Man India, infuriatingly vague as it is. And that’s the point — the vagueness of his identity fulfils Lee’s purpose for a character that could theoretically be embodied by anyone. If he had been called “Spider-Man Mumbai”, you cut out a majority of the population (and in capitalist terms, you cut out a good chunk of the market).

And in the case of Spider-Man India? Whew — you’ve got about a billion people imagining a billion different versions of him.

Whoever you are, whatever you see in Pavitr, that is what is personal to you, and there is nothing wrong with that, and I will not fault you for it. I will not fault you for saying Pavitr is from Central due to the origins of his last name. I also will not fault you for saying Pavitr is from South due to him practising kalaripayattu. I also will not fault you for saying he is not Hindu. I also will not fault you for saying he is a particular ethnicity without any proof.

What I will fault you for is trying to convince me and the others around you that Pavitr Prabhakar should be this particular ethnicity/have this cultural background because of some specific reason. I literally don’t care and it is fundamentally going against his character, going against the “anyone can wear the mask” sentiment of Spider-Man. By doing this, you are strengthening the walls that first divided us. You’re feeding the stratification and segmentation of our cultures — something that is actually not present in the fictional world of Mumbattan.

Like I said before: Mumbattan isn’t real, so the divides between ethnicities and cultural backgrounds are practically nonexistent. The best thing is that it is visually there for all to see. My favourite piece of evidence is this:

It’s a marquee for a cinema in the Mumbattan sequence, in the “Quick tour: this is where the traffic is” section. It has four titles; the first two are written in Hindi. The third title is written in Bengali*, and the fourth title is written in Tamil. You go to Mumbai and you won’t see a single shred of Bengali nor Tamil there, much less any other language that's not common in Maharashtra (Western India). Seeing this for the first time, you know what went through my head?

Wow, the numerous cultures of India are so intermingled here in Mumbattan! Everyone and everything is welcome!

I was happy, not just because of Tamil representation, but because of the fact that the plethora of Indian cultures are showcased coexisting in such a short sequence. This is India embracing all the little parts that make up its grander identity. This scene literally opened my eyes seeing such beauty in all the diverse cultures thriving together. In a place where language and cultural backgrounds blend so easily, each one complementing one another.

It is so easy to believe that, from this colourful palette of a setting, Pavitr Prabhakar truly is Spider-Man India, no matter where he comes from.

It’s easy to believe that Pavitr can come from any part of India, and I won’t call you out if the origin you have for him is different from the origin I have. You don’t need to stake out territory and stand your ground — you’re entitled to that opinion, and I respect it. In fact, I encourage it!!!

Because there’s only so much you can show in a ten minute segment of a film about a country that has such a vast history and even greater number of cultures. I want to see all of it — I want him to be a Malayali boy, a Hindi boy, a Bengali boy, a Telugu boy, an Urdu boy, whatever!! I want you to write him or draw him immersed in your culture, so that I can see the beauty of your background, the wonderful little things that make your culture unique and different from mine!

And, as many friends have said, it’s so common for Indian folks to be migrating around within our own country. A person with a Maharashtrian surname might end up living in Punjab, and no one really minds that. I’m actually from Karnataka, my family speaks Kannada, but somewhere down the line my ancestors moved to Tamil Nadu and settled down and lived very fulfilling lives. So I don’t actually have the “pure Tamil” upbringing, contrary to popular belief; I’ve gotten a mix of both Kannada and Tamil lifestyles, and it’s made my life that much richer. 

So it’s common for people to “not” look like their surname, if that’s what you’re really afraid about. In fact, it just adds to that layer of nuance, that even despite these rigid identities between ethnicities we as Indian people still intermingle with one another, bringing slivers of our cultures to share with others. Pavitr could just as well have been born in one state and moved around the country, and he happens to live in Mumbattan now. It’s entirely possible and there’s nothing to disprove that.

We don’t need to clamber over one another declaring that only one ethnicity is the “right” ethnicity, because, again, you will be looking at Pavitr and the rest of India in that narrow Western lens — a country with such rich cultural variety reduced to a homogenous restrictive way of life.

THE POLL: REINTERPRETED

This whole thing started because I was wondering why my little poll was so skewed — I thought people assumed I was asking them where he came from, then paired his physical appearance with the most logical options available. I thought it was my fault, that I had somehow influenced this outcome without knowing.

Truth is, I will never really know. But I will be thankful for it, because it gave me the opportunity to finally broach this topic, something that many of us desi folk are hesitant to talk about. I hope you have learned something from this, whether you are desi or a casual Spider-Man fan or someone who just so happened to stumble upon this. 

So just…be a little more open. Recognise that India, like many many countries and nations, is made up of a plethora of smaller cultures. And remember, if you’re trying to convince Pavitr that he’s a particular ethnicity, he’s going to wave his hand at you and say, “Ha, me? No, I’m one of the people that live here in the best Indian city! I’m Spider-Man India, dost!”

(Regardless, he still considers you a friend, because to him, the people matter more to him than you trying to box him into something he’s not.)

*Note: thank you dear anon for letting me know that the third title was Bengali, twas my mistake for literally completely forgetting

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

I wanna know ur Fontaine msq criticisms 👁️👁️👂I’m all ears

I'm not sure if you wanted me to talk about this secretly or publicly but! Here I go!

The TLDR: Fontaine MSQ aestheticised prison, poverty, child abuse, the justice system/court and didn't properly address any of it.

More:

Focalors/Furina has way too much of a sympathetic angle for a dictator who's lets people drown with her inaction.

Neuvillette feels Bad for sentencing some people to death/prison, but that's it. He's one of the most powerful people in Fontaine. If he felt like there are systemic injustices, I.E sending an abused Child to prison, he should be the first person to DO something about it, not just cry and be sad so the audience can be like aw, that's complex character writing isn't it? No it's not! And guilt doesn't absolve you!!!!!!! (These are stuff we deal with in OTCOJ read my fic now /j)

Meropide has children in it, both Sentenced there (Wriothesley) and BORN THERE (Lanoire), and this is just a quirk of the place. Not only that, Meropide accepts prisoners of all genders and crimes. There are abusers and abuse victims in one place. Do you know how bad that is? How much potential for crimes to happen in a place like that— oh wait, Meropide isn't under Fontaine's jurisdiction. If you are assaulted as an inmate it literally means nothing to the court.

Wriothesley had no qualifications when he took over. Depending on how long he lived on the streets, how old he was when he killed his parents, how old he was when he was first taken in by the orphanage, etc, the man might never have more than 4–5 years of formal education. Sigewinne probably had to teach him how to write reports. And do Meropide's spreadsheets. Edit because I forgot to elaborate on this one: This isn't a point brought up anywhere, which is bad, because when poverty and incarceration robs you of a proper education (and the rights to vote in many places too, too, by the way), it reduces your prospects for jobs, reduces many people's ability to get a home etc etc. Wriothesley was just, narratively, Given his position.

Meropide is an industrialized prison, and they portray this as a good thing. Prisoners are paid in coupons for their labour, and this is also portrayed as a good thing.

The One-Meal-A-Day reform was something Paimon gushed about being so great of a perk, that people might want to go to jail for food (could be interesting and reflective of systemic poverty if MHY had brains, but they don't, so I was just Pissed because essentially all Paimon wanted to say was "Prison isn't so bad, but still don't go to prison guys! Prison labour is really hard!"). By the way, in most real-world prisons they are obligated to feed you three meals a day. Because that's how much food a human needs. MHY went with one meal just so they can say "if you want to eat more, you have to work." And then the welfare meal is a goddamn gacha. So imagine you're a starving child who's too weak to work in the fucking robot assembly line, and you wander up for your first meal in 24 hours, only to luck in with a shit one. I'd kill myself.

They wrote Wriothesley, who's a victim of the system, into a guy who's say shit like "I'm the Duke I can do whatever I want" for a cool moment where he choke-slams an inmate (I know he was a bad guy. But also, in copaganda when cops are violent/disregarding protocols, they are always only portrayed to do that against bad guys, so what does our critical thinking tells us about this one?) They wrote Wriothesley, who was an inmate of a prison so bad, so notorious that it is the literal boogeyman of Fontaine, that has a legal (???) fighting pit, with an administrator who abuses his position to be unreasonable, to willingly stay in the place and become an Administrator who would choke-slam an inmate while saying a cool line about how he has the power to do whatever he wants. They wrote him, the guy who had to be fed on the streets by melusines, to think one-meal-a-day was a good enough reform (while he spends god-knows how much on his boat). This wasn't a victim-turns-into-abuser narrative either, they want all this to be seen as positive character growth.

And then, the final kicker is, they gloss over his entire abuse. You can only read about these shit in his profile, which most people don't because they don't Have Him or doesn't care to unlock it/read it online, and they jammed his entire backstory into a flaccid info-dump at the end of his character story quest. This man isn't Allowed to feel abused and neglected and show any reaction to it within the narrative of Fontaine itself, because if they actually Gave Weight to what happened to him, they'd have to confront THE FUCKING JUSTICE SYSTEM they had NO PLANS on criticising. I don't think they ever explicitly said the fucking Crime-Theatre nonsense was Bad either.

I could go on, but this is already so long. But yeah, I hope this gave you an idea.

[not-poignant]

Are Sebastian and Alex going to learn about bdsm and safe practices/negotiation? Or do they keep fumbling around and doing what they're doing?

Hi anon,

People who learn about BDSM don't necessarily practice safe practices or negotiation.

And there are elements of negotiation in this story! It's not a black and white 'they're not doing this in a paint-by-numbers sort of way and therefore it doesn't count' situation, y'know?

They are two characters in their mid-20s who live in a tiny town, one of those characters is dyslexic to the point that he can barely read, and the other's method of doing things has worked for him all his life (or so he thinks), they don't have any reason/s to learn about BDSM, and it's not likely that either of them ever will.

That also doesn't mean that they can't enjoy their kinky sex life.

There has been a lot of discussion already, and there will be more and more going forwards. It might not be at the level most people want, but Sebastian has certainly obtained consent (more than once), offered and then insisted on debriefs and post-sex discussion, explained to Alex how to communicate if he hates something, and made it clear that what he likes is unusual and sadistic in nature. It's also clear that Alex likes being pushed, i.e. - not being forced to give consent in every circumstance when someone can take control and give him what he wants anyway. That's actually pretty common in some people with a child abuse background who become people pleasers.

If you want negotiation + safe practices at a certain level, you'd have to completely remake Alex's character into someone who can magically be a functional, communicative, healthy human being, and he's not that. Alex is getting better at communicating (that's how we go this far in the story in the first place), but if you expect this story to end on Alex being a perfect human who can do Instagram-level kink negotiation, then no, this isn't the story you want, anon.

If you look deeper and don't expect cookie cutter kinds of dialogue, there has been ongoing negotiation in the story since the early chapters. When Alex makes it clear through physical response and then verbal that he doesn't like yelling, Sebastian stops yelling. When Sebastian makes it clear that he has complicated feelings about hiring his ex-school bully as a cleaner, Alex makes it clear that he doesn't share those complicated feelings, especially in light of the pay rate. Sebastian consenting to Alex being his cleaner makes it clear that those terms are acceptable to him.

When Alex tries to undervalue himself, Sebastian makes it clear that he's not comfortable paying someone less simply because they value themselves less. When Alex then takes that pay, it's a form of consent to Sebastian's attitudes. Their relationship has been an ongoing negotiation since the beginning, and that's how they've grown closer. If you're used to only looking for very obvious signs of negotiation, it might be easy to miss the non-verbal and subtle forms of negotiation that are happening.

For example, it might not seem like it, but Sebastian - many chapters ago now - talking about how he likes control in the bedroom and that turning Alex on long before they'd ever shared anything sexual together, is a form of communication. Alex learns he likes the idea of it without it ever been forced on him, and Sebastian wouldn't have that conversation with someone he didn't trust (for example, Alex in the beginning of the story). They had to have trust to have that conversation, Alex had to have trust to ask Sebastian questions about it in the oblique way he did, and they had to share a common comfortability have a conversation in that direction in the first place.

In A Stain that Won't Dissolve, these things don't look like a psychologist's version of: 'Okay, what do you want, and this is what I want, and here's where we meet in the middle' - a lot of life doesn't look like this (but if you want that, I've written that in Falling Falling Stars - it still has dubious consent though, lol). Both Alex and Sebastian have poor communication on their side, and it's a growth story for the two of them.

But no, I have no intention of Sebastian ever learning terms like 'subspace' or 'RACK' or anything like that. A lot of people in the world, especially prior to easy access to the internet, figured this stuff out on their own and many of them made it work even without the rigid or codified structures of the world of BDSM (and some of those people went on to invent the world of BDSM that we take for granted today).

It's the kinks that make you kinky, not the knowledge of an acronym or the world it engenders.

There's also no reason to think that Sebastian has access to a healthy education about BDSM there, it's not like Elliott was practicing much healthy BDSM in my other Stardew fic, The Wind that Cuts the Night, :D Elliott knew all about safe practices, negotiation, and BDSM, and chose to ignore a lot of the safe stuff over messing around more dangerously.

The fumbling around is the point, basically. Growing up is messy, and dubious consent is hot (for some of us), and there are many ways we communicate with the people around us, especially when it's two guys in a town the valourises machismo and stoicism over emotional openness, and one of those guys was beaten by his father over not being macho and strong enough which makes him exceptionally resistant to communicating clearly even about basic subjects and needs.

That's the part I actually really love about this story.

[mattodore]

60 questions with Theo | playlist, pinterest | ->

1. What’s the one thing they would save in a fire?

Theo is a collector and a bit of a hoarder, so there’d be too much he’d try to save. I really couldn’t just say one thing… but I guess he’d grab his memory journal first.

2. What’s their biggest regret?

Not being good enough. Not being lovable enough. 

3. How would they fare in a zombie apocalypse?

Theo would do very well up until a point. He’s a survivor through and through, but I do think he’d burn out eventually. He could go a few years before breaking down. When he’s no longer able to repress all of his emotions, the feeling of exhaustion would weigh on him. He’d get bitten soon after, almost on purpose.

4. Where do they see themselves in five years? Ten?

Working for his father for a few decades and later taking over his father’s company. He feels a lot of dread and nausea over this.

5. What’s their most useless, weirdest, or least marketable skill?

He can wiggle his ears.

6. What are they like in the bedroom — well-rounded lover or wooden plank?

Theo is… well. More wooden plank than anything. Sorry, Theo. But, well, he normally goes for more aggressive partners who tend to take control anyway. I don’t think Theo really wants to be all there during sex… it’s one of the reasons why he normally uses before finding hook-ups… it makes him a little foggy and loose. I do think, however, that it’s a little bit different when he’s with women. In Theo’s experience, women treat him kinder… which is one of the reasons why he mostly sleeps with men. He wants affection, sure, but he’s also uncomfortable with it… he’s used to pain. With Matthias, however, this does end up changing. Maybe it’s because Matthias is gentle with him unless he’s asked for it to be rough, or because Matthias won’t fuck him when he’s using, but Theo’s more active when having sex with Matthias. Not a lot of talking, but he pulls and pushes and moves how he wants. After a while, he starts taking control and speaking more.

7. Have they committed a crime before? Which one(s)?

Theo uses drugs frequently.

8. If they were an animal, which one would they be? Which one would they think they’d be?

Theo is a pygmy rabbit or a netherland dwarf rabbit (that temperament… yeah). I think Theo would see himself as… well, a goldfish trapped in a bowl, swimming in endless circles and going nowhere.

9. Do they cheat to win or play by the rules?

Theo plays by the rules, generally speaking. If we’re talking sports, though, he does play dirty. He’s very competitive.

10. What do they fantasize about?

Comfort. A room with a door that locks and will keep him safe all night. A bed on the floor. Blinds and curtains on every window. Matthias’s arms wrapped around him so tight he can hardly breathe.

11. Who’s the most important person in their life?

I want to say Matthias, but it’s his parents. It’s hard for Theo to cut them off, even despite the abuse. I don’t think this changes to Matthias for a very, very long time.

12. What’s their ideal vacation like?

Theo can’t even imagine what a vacation would be like. I think even fantasizing about it would stress him out… he’d just think about how far behind it’d put him academically. 

13. What is/was/will be their college major?

Business. Statistics and data. He doesn’t like it.

14. What’s their favorite book genre, if they enjoy reading at all?

Theo doesn’t read for pleasure very often — he has too much reading to do for school — but I think he’s always enjoyed science fiction from a very young age.

15. How would they describe themselves?

Theo wouldn’t know how to describe himself at all. He’d freeze at the question and become despondent.

16. How would others describe them?

Matthias: Lovely beyond words. Intelligent and wry. Shy, pulls away when feelings are too much or too positive. Irresistible. Anxious about things that I could make go away if he'd let me. Lashes out when he gets scared. Strong when he shouldn’t have to be. Soft when he should be hard. Too forgiving to the wrong people. Easily frustrated. Standing on the edge. Endearingly insolent. A mirrored image. Every beautiful thing. Angel. Bambi. Mała myszko.

Everett: Sometimes he makes himself so small… like an injured animal. Jumpy and skittish. But strong, too… impassive when he’s hurt. He’s hiding a lot, but you can see through the cracks sometimes. He needs help, but he won’t let anyone in.

Jordan: Stubborn and headstrong. Naïve or just reckless. Lost. Like a child.

Dutchie: Hard to get to know. Honestly couldn’t tell you much about him despite the years of friendship. Still… you wanna protect him.

Jackson: Fun to be around, y’know… for a rich kid. Troubled, though. Hard to reach. Everyone wants to get to know him better, but… he doesn’t really allow that.

Kavi: Incredibly intelligent but totally aloof. Mysterious. Nose always buried in his books. Cold.

Imani: Too good for Matthias. Sweet. 

17. What’s the most ridiculous thing they’ve ever spent money on?

A large collection of delicate Fenton glass bells and assorted pieces. He collects them and stores them in an antique curio cabinet in his apartment.

18. What’s their dream job?

He doesn’t have a dream job. He just does what he’s told and expected to do, which is to work for his father.

19. How’s their financial situation?

His parents have a lot of money. He doesn’t have a job (honestly… he isn’t permitted one). He’s financially reliant on his parents.

20. Who’s their go-to person for advice?

Theo doesn’t ask for advice from anyone. 

21. What’s one secret of theirs that could potentially ruin a relationship they have?

If he told his parents that he’s bisexual and interested in men they would cut him off or worse…

22. Are they a dog person or a cat person — or something else?

Theo’s never had a pet before, so I don’t even think he himself knows the answer to this. He likes Matthias’s cat well enough, but he’s never been around many dogs to really choose between the two. I think he really likes looking at fish… I’m iffy on if he’d ever actually own one, though.

23. What’s one childhood memory they’ve never forgotten?

CW for child abuse. I’m talking directly about an instance of abuse. This isn’t vague like I usually am when I talk about Theo’s trauma.

Being beaten for tracking mud onto the rug in his father’s office. His father stood him in front of a full length mirror in the hall and made him watch. If he looked away he would be struck again. If his knees buckled he would be hauled back up and hit harder. It felt like it lasted for hours. Theo had been in the gardens beforehand, an umbrella held over him by his au pair. The dwarf sunflowers had bloomed and in his excitement he pulled off a petal and barreled into the home, heading straight to his father to show him how yellow the petals were. His au pair couldn’t keep up with him, and Theo was always forgetting to take off his shoes when he came in from outside. He was very young… maybe five or six.

24. Do they have any phobias?

Open doors. Windows without curtains or blinds. Locks that aren’t sturdy. Mirrors. Older men. Authoritative figures.

25. What’s one thing they’re utterly incapable of doing without the help of someone else?

Theo is actually very independent. It’s hard to think of anything he couldn’t do himself, because he’s always been on his own, really. 

26. What’s one topic they could never get tired of researching or learning about?

Theo is very intelligent, but he’s not actually that interested in learning. He lost that drive and passion at a relatively young age. He’s no longer curious. Hm… I think he might get a little thrill from learning information that’s just… completely useless. Like, think dumb trivia. Still, though… knowledge is synonymous with pressure to him. It makes him feel sick.

27. What’s their favorite genre of music?

Theo will listen to anything. I don’t think he necessarily has a favorite genre. Hm… I think he likes lullabies, though. Quiet music. Calming.

28. Who, if anyone, do they dislike most?

Himself.

29. If they could change one thing about themselves, physical or otherwise, what would it be?

Whatever would make his parents happy with him. Whatever could make him better suited for the part they want him to play.

30. What’s their political stance?

Theo is whatever his parents want him to be on paper, but politically he’s… a liberal, I guess. His party friends, in general, lean left… and they’re definitely influencing him some. However, I don’t think he has the backbone to really go any which way. 

This question is a little hard for me to answer with some of the echthroi cast because they’re rich at the end of the day, ya’ know? Materially, politics don’t touch them.

31. Are they religious?

No.

32. What were they like in high school?

He was all over the place. Quiet and then having these uncontrollable outbursts. Fearful. Frequently pulled aside by teachers, being asked pointed questions. Standoffish. Flinching when touched. Far away from the other students. At the same time he was scared to be alone, though, so he would blend in with the crowds when he could. At the summer school he was sent to yearly, the outbursts always got worse.

33. What’s the worst injury they’ve ever had?

I’m going to choose not to answer this one.

34. Do they work to live or live to work?

Live to work. He doesn’t know who he’d be without it. It’s what he was molded for.

35. Do/did they want children?

No. Theo is scared of even the idea of having children.

36. What’s their favorite thing about themselves?

Nothing? I don’t know. Theo… really doesn’t like himself. Maybe his hair, though… his pierced ears… the things he feels give him autonomy.

37. What’s their favorite thing about their significant other, if they have one?

Hm. I think Theo really likes how big Matthias is. He towers over people and is visibly strong. I think that offers Theo a lot of comfort. He feels safe when Matthias is around. Matthias is also very protective, so… it makes it easier for Theo to face his fears. There’s a reliability to Matthias that Theo needs. Matthias cares about him and tells him frequently how much he loves him… Theo’s never had that before. It makes him feel lighter.

38. If they hear something go bump in the night, do they get out of bed to check it out or do they stay put?

Theo is paralyzed but his mind shoots off at a mile a minute. He’s too terrified to do anything.

39. What’s one skill they wish they had?

A photographic memory. It would make his life a lot easier with regards to his education. He’s never thought about the downsides to this… especially as someone with drug and trauma related memory loss…

40. What do other people find annoying about them, if anything?

He can be very cutting and dismissive. He's judgmental, too. First impressions are everything if you want him to even be cordial with you.

41. What do other people love most about them?

He has this magnetism to him that you can’t really put your finger on. I think it’s a combination of how handsome he is alongside the way he keeps himself almost entirely separate from everyone else… you always want what you can’t have. 

42. What’s the typical first impression after meeting this person?

That he’s very prickly or just cold… restless… doleful. 

43. What do people notice first about them, as far as their appearance goes?

The repressed anger and sorrow in his eyes. Then, maybe, all those beauty marks. The elegant line of his body.

44. Does this person try their best to be honest or are they not above lying to get their way?

Theo isn’t a very good liar, but he’s very good at prevarication and skirts the truth with ease. 

45. What kind of movies do they like?

Theo doesn’t have time for movies. Regardless… I think he’d like horror movies. I think… Theo would find a lot of comfort in watching horrible things happen to fictional people. He could fictionalize the abuse he’s faced that way.

46. Are they the life of the party or a wallflower?

I’d say he’s a bit of a mixed bag on this one. If he’s using, he’s the life of the party. If he’s sober, he’s a wallflower. Either way, though, people will approach him to strike up conversation and ask him to dance.

47. Are they an early bird or a night owl?

Early bird. Theo doesn’t actually like the night. Does he still party until three in the morning? Yeah. But… well. Theo tortures himself in many different ways, doesn’t he?

48. Are they a good kisser?

He’s not bad at it, but he never really kissed anyone until Matthias. So… he’s not amazing at it or anything. He’s learning as he goes. 

49. Do they think about what they wear or do they throw on whatever they find first?

Theo definitely plans out outfits. I think he has three separate lives he’s living and three separate fashion senses to suit each of them. He dresses very typically masculine and rich when he’s with his parents. He dresses down for university but incorporates some elements of his nightlife wardrobe on occasion. He experiments more with sexuality and gender for his nightlife fashion… I think this is what he would prefer to wear all the time, only with a less dramatic flare.

50. Do they have any insecurities?

I could be contracted to write a trilogy about Theo’s insecurities and would meet every deadline with ease. The underlying root of all of his insecurities is his belief that he’s unlovable and dirty, though. Let’s keep it simple with that.

51. What is their favorite thing about themselves?

A repeat question. I’ll add onto my last answer, though, to say that I think he has some days where he feels really good about his appearance and some days he doesn’t. He’s temperamental.

52. What’s their diet like?

Theo eats whatever is made for him and will finish all of it even if he dislikes it or isn’t hungry. He doesn’t have any favorites, but he really dislikes candy or sweets.

53. If they could only eat one thing for the rest of their life, what would it be?

Again, he doesn’t have anything in particular he likes. I guess something easy to eat would be the answer… maybe mangos.

54. What’s their body count, if they have one?

I think he has sex very regularly… on average I'd say once a week unless he’s studying too intensely for a break or his last experience was a really rough one. He doesn’t always sleep with new people, either. The faces blur, though. Hm. I can’t say an exact number and Theo wouldn’t be counting anyway.

55. Who do they look up to most?

The blurry image he has of his childhood au pair.

56. What do they smell like?

Copying things I’ve mentioned previously here… Theo smells very clean. Think green and fresh… a little powdery. He doesn’t often wear cologne, so he mostly just smells like soap — not even his body lotion is scented. He doesn’t like strong or chemical smells on himself. As a signature he’d wear a spritz of Francis Kurkdjian’s Aqua Universalis. However, Theo will also wear Gucci’s Tears from the Moon, which was a gift from his mother, if he’s at family events — it’s outside of his preference but that’s neither here nor there.

57. How do they feel about drugs?

…Theo is an addict. He doesn’t get clean for a few years and relapses multiple times. He relies on them but he also wishes he’d never touched them sometimes, usually when the guilt floods in after he’s sobered up from one of the outbursts he’s had because of them.

58. If they could change one thing about their life, what would it be?

Hm. I’m going to bow out of answering this question as well.

59. What motivates them?

A desire for recognition, acceptance, and love.

60. What are some of their simple pleasures?

Collecting knickknacks. Cold showers. The wind whipping through his hair when he sticks his head out of the window of a car. The sound of the windchimes outside his bedroom window. Odious purring on his chest. Matthias’s voice in his ear.

[luminiera-merge]

i think my tolerance for moe (ie the anime stuff) is in freefall rn