#seeing it taught me things about myself

[the-river-rix]

This show changed my life

[andsewingishalfthebattle]

Novice sewing pattern: Cut out shapes. Line up the little triangles on the edges. Stitch edges together. We've also included step-by-step assembly instructions with illustrations.

Novice knitting pattern: yOU MUSt uNDerstANd thE SECret cOdE CO67 (73, 87, 93) BO44 (63, 76, 90) 28 (32, 34) slip first pw repeat 7x K to end *kl (pl) 42 * until 13" (13, 13, 15) join new at 30 pl for 17 rows ssk 27 k2tog mattress lengthwise BO and sacrifice a goat to the knitting gods. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WANT "INSTRUCTIONS," I JUST GAVE THEM TO YOU

[uncanny-tranny]

Your fears that you don't have a body that will transition "well" are, sure, understandable, but there isn't truly such thing as a body that's unworthy of transition. Perhaps your changing body won't suit everybody's taste, but would you rather live for yourself or for the whims of random people who don't care about your happiness as long as they're attracted to what they see?

Transition is for anybody who wants it. It's okay to be fearful. It's okay to be uncertain. But it isn't the end of the world. You are in control, and if you choose to transition to any capacity, it should be at your behest. You and your body are worthy of transition. I hope you are able to seize transition and do what you truly want for yourself.

[lorephobic]

have i talked before about how crazy it drives me that in old bdubs videos he would super abashedly talk about his love for making things pretty? because. it drives me crazy.

at the beginning of mc4 when everyone was clearing out spawn so it was a lifeless flat plot of land to build on and bdubs took it personally and added grass and foliage once everything was built to make the whole landscape more lively and cohesive. and how hed get made fun of for thinking about little shit like that.

also when he got asked what hed be doing if he wasnt doing mc and he mentioned music (i think) and basically was super embarrassed to be like “i know its not very manly, but im super into artsy fartsy stuff”. as if that is a bad thing.

anyway im getting so emo thinking about how in hermitcraft, everyone knows and admires bdubs skill as a builder and its not ever something thats made fun of anymore. thinking about how bdubs never talks down about his own abilities anymore and instead of feeling weird about being a dude whose into artsy fartsy stuff, hes really embraced his career as a creator of beautiful things.

[biblicallyaccuratepigeons]

man sometimes you gotta make your own gender euphoria by reminding yourself that you're undercover and actually trying to trick people into thinking you're cisgender

[uygfiug]

how do you people study through extreme exhaustion? bc thats what always gets me during the exams & i cannot keep doing this forever

[ratcandy]

youknow i am off the deep end when I start getting up and pacing my dorm while arguing to myself out loud about lore

[daffodil--lament]

i keep remembering and feeling sick to my stomach. it's like finding out for the first time every single time. god i am so tired

[barkingangelbaby]

venting so much i ran out of tags lmao

[firebirdsdaughter]

Okay I can’t not say something…

… I dunno what’s going on in Geats. I’m not watching it. Sounds like my man Michianga is getting some shit which sucks, when will Takahashi treat the purple guys right???

I say, not even sure I’m spelling his name right.

But I genuinely cannot believe people are still trying to come for Horobi on this.

So let’s clear some things up.

1) Horobi was absolutely set up. Probably wasn’t the Ark’s plan from the start exactly, but she knowingly made him dependent on her and psychologically abused and manipulated him for years. Disconnected from her, Horobi was unstable and trying to grapple w/ trying to think for himself. He was heavily traumatised and easily manipulated, making him the perfect patsy. All she had to do was poke Izu’s blind devotion to Aruto a bit and have her use her usual brand of insensitive, socially unaware ‘help.’ That situation was absolutely orchestrated.

2) Is two things. Izu could easily have dodged that shot and choose not to, and Horobi had no reason to think she had no backup (which was ridiculous to begin w/). He’d made it very clearly he considered backups to be a form of immortality for ai, and we have no clue how he would have reacted if she dodged bc she choose not to. Obviously Horobi ‘shouldn’t’ have resorted to violence to ‘end’ that interaction, but he was not in a mental place where he could make that distinction. It’s all he’s ever known, it’s predominately the only way anyone has ever treated him. He was panicked and she was harassing him. He was desperate to end the interaction in anyway possible, and he’d already tried walking away. But there is no way he ‘knew’ he was ‘killing’ her (and, well… He didn’t). He actually seems genuinely shaken that she just took the hit, being unable to respond to Jin’s question (which he always has before). He wasn’t planning on ‘killing’ her at all, he just needed her to stop. She also choose to go in there in the first place. That’s like… Not to compare any of these characters to dogs in that way, but that’s like a domesticated Pomeranian walking into a playpen w/ a recently ‘rescued’ wolf that’s been abused and used in fighting rings and trying to play and being shocked it got bitten.

3) There were so many people who could have done something. Jin, who’s been so ready to take hits for people he barely knows before, just stands there. There were plenty of humans around! Fuwa and Yua, who started this whole damn thing, were nowhere to be seen, and Fuwa had an opportunity to stop the fighting and fucked it up. Like I absolutely believe there’s a correlation between Fuwa shooting Horobi for asking him that question and Horobi shooting at Izu to get her to stop provoking him. Aruto himself is more busy trying to force the HumaGear outside to go back to how he thinks they should be then dealing w/ the actual root of the situation. If he actually cared as much as he claims, maybe he’d realise how much suffering Horobi is going through and actually try to address the situation, rather than leaving it to his secretary who is in no way capable of doing so?

Basically, the fact of the matter is that this was not Horobi killing Izu in cold blood, it was more equivalent to a wounded animal trying to defend itself. She choose to go in there, back him into a corner, and choose not to back off when she saw he was becoming agitated. She choose not to dodge. He fired back in an attempt to end the interaction, bc she was doing more harm than help. Ultimately, I’m not trying to pin this on her, either, although I have Issues w/ how she was portrayed. Izu was never going to be able to help Horobi there bc she just could not understand what he was going through. In her mind, devotion to Aruto makes everything right, Aruto is the absolute best thing ever. And that’t not her fault, that was how she was made, and he inadvertently groomed her into that. But let’s not get me started on Aruto. The fact of the matter is that this was literally everyone’s fault. Well, it’s Gai and the Ark’s fault (bc the Ark is Gai’s fault), but if Horobi and even Izu herself had done nothing different but someone else present actually used their common sense for five seconds, this would never have happened.

Literally, this is saying that a traumatised, abused child soldier lashing out bc they feel backed into a corner and scared out of their minds is deliberately aggressive. Horobi was protecting himself the only way he knew how, Izu was (unintentionally, like she meant well but meaning well does not equate to doing well) harassing and provoking him and randomly decided not to dodge for some inconceivable reason, and everyone else decided that clearly, the sheltered ai w/ limited world experience and knowledge was obviously the right person to deal w/ the traumatised, abused, unstable one.

Also Fuwa and Yua started it and Fuwa had a chance to stop the fighting and fucked it up. An in character fuck up, maybe, but a fuck up. Aruto was more bothered w/ getting his free labour back than helping the traumatised child soldier. Jin randomly decides to be useless.

Edit: bc I realise I forgot them, Naki and Ikazuchi aren’t even there, they just show up to talk shit later like what the fuck guys maybe actually make and effort before you start badmouthing your supposed family member who you know has been horribly abused and mind controlled all his life.

GAI AND THE ARK.

Aaaaand… I’m not talking about after bc I think I’ve ruffled enough feathers.

Basically, while the situation in Geats does sound much more straightforward, I will not stand for people depicting Horobi as some knowingly malicious killer when he was very clearly not in a space where he could or knew how to make those calls. The man had only just gotten disconnected from the Ark, he was just learning how to make decisions. He didn’t ‘choose’ to ‘kill’ Izu, he acted on an instinct to protect himself out of fear and then he himself did not understand his actions.

[dykedragons]

oh ps im so fucking glad to be done with school (dgmw i LOVED college but it was an INSANE amount of work and im exhausted). i can do whatever i want now guilt-free. its AMAZING. i can play minecraft guilt free i can do COMMISSIONS guilt free like bro....... it was so hard doing commissions during school TToTT

like yall.... what NINE (9) fucking classes in a term will do to an mf. i only recommend it if u have like zero other priorities bc. WOW. it was a LOT. (i also put 100% into literally everything i do but still it tested my fucking LIMITS.) (only one all-nighter had to be pulled though and it wasnt even on a school night so thats cool of me)

more. rambling under the cut

(like im soooososo grateful for the business + JUST whining like i needed the moneys regardless so i dont appreciate it any less. and they were still a lot of fun. but the workload was cray cray. im so grateful my commissioners didnt mind the ~2 month wait bc i felt so bad kjdnfnkjsfds blows yall a kiss... excited to get thru my current queue too!! once i. have the weekend to myself bc. GOD i need that.)

im really amazed im not burnt the fuck out?? like i look forward to drawing still!! and doing more 3D when i have the mental capacity for it (done my current comm queue). i love that stuff so much. ive pushed myself so much and created things in time crunches i thought would wreck me but ive proven myself wrong again and again and its amazing. im truly proud of myself and the person im becoming yall its a magical thing!!!! and my WORK. is the best its ever looked even when its rushed. i am fucking gobsmacked. my god. i NEED to keep doing gesture studies someone pplleease be on my ass about that lol /j

and NOT TO MENTION MY FRIENDS....... like MAN i fuckin love those guys holy shit. my dumb ass coming to school like "ohghggh i hope i make friends" BITCH YOULL MAKE THE BEST FRIENDS OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was so silly... i met one of my best friends on the FIRST DAY and DIDNT EVEN KNOW IT!!!!!!! ugh im just. im so grateful. eternally grateful for this experience. i have grown tenfold i have gained tenfold.

i feel. ready for my next steps... i have my first job coming up and im gonna be doing 3D for freelance and learning new things... getting my shit TOGETHER making money (hopefully a lot) and learning to be an adult n shit. "catch up" to my peers (thats how it feels). it feels good and in my best moments i feel like the future is bright yk.... like. yeah i can do this!!!!!!! yeah. yeah. its gonna be alright.

[nullcoast]

The world is fucking disgusting

[the-acid-pear]

Seeing your own trans body and identity as your masterpiece is so important

[randolhllee]

I know this is not unique and anyone who knows a lot about a given topic is going to feel like this but. Tumblr posts where someone says "Anyone who's taken an intro-level economics course knows *blatantly untrue statement*" are my villain origin story

[pen-papers]

💬

It’s funny when I look at all these sketches,videos,and speed-paints I’ve done over the years, that I still actually doubt that I did them in someway. Even though that’s exactly why I record and save so much of my progress in wips and sketches! There are many times I actually have to stop and remind myself that I actually have been putting in the work and effort to make this stuff that I like.

because I know my mind well enough, that waaay in the back, there’s this little voice saying “but did you really do that?”

and it will suddenly make me reevaluate everything i’ve done up till now.

it’s agonizing in a really odd way.

[neverendingford]

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