#sharing-a-room-with-an-open-fire
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eupheme · 10 months ago
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— sugar, sugar
[part ii] | [part iii] | [masterlist]
wolverine/logan howlett x neighbor!f!reader
rated e - 6.5k
tags: asshole friend!wade, (sorta soft) roommate!logan, baker!neighbor!reader, flirting, mutual yearning, immature humor, a reference to while you were sleeping, wingman!wade and the worse way to meet someone, light angst, oral sex, swallowing, fingering, v. light ass play, unprotected PiV, appearance of The Claws, what’s a refractory period, sorta audible voyeurism (brief/humorous)
a/n: includes spoilers for deadpool & wolverine (which omg I loved - what was your fave cameo?)
Your eccentric neighbor Wade may drive you a little up the wall… but, you’re willing to put up with him if it means he’ll introduce you to his new, grumpy-looking roommate.
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“You gonna introduce me?”
You’ve cornered Wade in the apartment’s laundry room - the door to the front-loading washer hanging open as he holds a bundle of red fabric up to his chest.
“You think this will wash out?” 
The suit in question looks like it had been run over by a truck and then set on fire, with the rips criss-crossed in the leather and the numerous charred holes scattered across the chest.
“Definitely.” Your eyes flicker down, and then back up, “So, will you?”
He bundles the suit up - flinging into the back of the washer, the laundry basket still tucked under an arm.
“Really? Not even ‘hello, Wade’? ‘Looking good, Wade’?” His voice pitches up, imitating yours, “Does our friendship really mean nothing to you?”
You wouldn’t necessarily call Wade Wilson a friend.
In fact, he’s honestly the worst neighbor you’ve ever had. 
Loud, obnoxious. Persuasive - the first night you met you had been banging on his door at three in the morning, yelling at him to shut up as music and a caterwauling voice blared through the shared wall.
Ten minutes later you were playing the drums on his late night session of Rock Band, using a banana and a wooden spoon in place of sticks. Only for Althea to stomp out of her room and shut everything down, scaring both of you out of your skins.  
But sometimes, you think - remembering the times he came through for you, a shoulder to cry on, helping him this slump he’s been digging himself out of - he might just be the best, as well.
And maybe that was friendship, after all. 
You sigh, leaning against the row of washers. Eyes flicking over him, a small smile tugging at your lips.
“You do look good, Wade,” There’s a tilt of your head, the smile widening, “Glad you lost the toupee, that really wasn’t your color.”
“Ah, ah. Repurposed,” He chides, cupping his crotch, “You wouldn’t believe how much I’ve missed-”
“Ew, stop.” Your face scrunches, a hand covering your eyes as you shield your vision, “Will you please just answer my question?”
He throws a handful of shirts in the washer, “Which was...?”
Your head shakes - a hand on his arm as you reach for a glint of gold in the pile of clothes. Cringing as a handgun appears, held gingerly between thumb and forefinger as you set it on the side table.
“Good call,” He nods, “Dry clean only.”
You can't help a laugh then, even as your hands brace on your hips, “I want to meet your roommate.”
He frowns, “You’ve met Blind Al.”
“Jesus, Wade. Not Al." A hand waves, " I mean Mister Tall, Dark, and Brooding.”
You’ve seen the stranger in the hallways a few times in the month since he’s moved in. Scruffy and scowling the first time, a silent shadow behind Wade’s endless chatter. 
But in the weeks following, that look had softened. You’d stopped by twice with cookies to welcome him, but every time you’ve just gotten Al.
Not that you dislike Al, that’s not it at all. She’s sweet enough to you when it’s not 3 a.m. or if Wade doesn’t have her annoyed half to death.
But you certainly weren’t harboring a crush on her. Maybe even secretly hoping that maybe the new neighbor will get a little lost and end up at your door, instead of his new place.  
“Ooh,” The syllables draw out - detergent flung in, before he’s leaning against the washer too, facing you. “Yeah, Logan. He's great, got a mean ‘Hugh Jackman’ vibe, just without the singing. You’d like him.”
Something like hope flutters in your belly, but then he’s raising a finger - wiggling it at you, “Just one question though. What’s in it for me?”
That has you scowling, “What do you mean? You owe me. I covered for you when you had that barqueue in the stairwell.”
“God, that was great sausage.” Wade groans, thinking back, “Mmm, but I think Peter covered for me.”
“Who do you think got Peter?”
“Well, I don’t remember seeing you.” He shrugs.
“I was right-,” You pinch the bridge of your nose between thumb and forefinger, a sharp exhale of breath, “Fine. If you do this for me, I’ll do that thing you keep asking me to do.”
Wade gasps gleefully, “You mean you’ll make the triple decker-”
“-chocolate caramel cheesecake chimichangas. Yes.” You finish with him, arms crossing over your chest, “You’re lucky you heal fast because that should put you right into a food coma.”
“Right. Lucky me,” He smirks. A second as he thinks, before he snaps his fingers, “I’m having a little get-together tonight! You should come. Was gonna invite you anyway.”
The pounding in your head ratchets up at the thought that all this could’ve been avoided.
“Logan sleeps on the couch, though,” He adds, sagely, “So just letting you know that if the two of you decide to get your fuck on in my bed, according to the state of New York I am legally allowed to join you.”
“Thanks for the warning,” You grimace - even if you’re certain that cannot possibly be true, “But I do have my own apartment.”
“Oh, right.” There’s the faintest edge of disappointment in his tone, paired with a sigh.
You give him a sideways look, then.
“I saw Vanessa leaving yesterday. Things getting better?”
He sobers at that, eyes moving towards the sliver of a window. The glimpse of the street outside.
“Yeah.” Wade manages, “Yeah, I think so.”
There had once been a flicker of something. In-between your annoyance and exasperation, there were tendrils of tenderness. Long snuffed out, when you had seen just how banged up his heart was. How it’s always belonged to another. 
You had gotten over it. Gotten to a place where seeing him now, like this, makes you smile.
“I’m really glad to hear that.” 
He smiles, then.
“Thanks. Me too.”
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“Hey, hold on.” Wade darts in front of his roommate, a leg kicked up high to block the doorway, “Where are you going? You can’t go out.”
Logan scowls, an arm already shoved into his leather jacket, “Sure I can.”
The blow against his shoulder might move a lesser man, but Wade’s fingers just grip the frame even tighter, “But I promised-, I got a friend that wants to meet you. There is some really important shit at stake here. I can’t let you go.”
An eyebrow cocks, “Can’t? I think we both know how that would go if you tried to stop me.”
It would be easy to get into this right here and now, but his suit is still in the dryer and he’s not about to spend another hour cleaning up blood.
“Wait, wait, wait,” He throws a hand up, “Aren’t you listening to me? A girl wants to meet you. She’s hot, she has a job, and she has an apartment. You’re only one outta three there. Can’t you see what a good opportunity this is? This is totally in your favor!”
Logan scoffs, his tongue tucking against his teeth. Hesitating for just a second, but it's enough that Wade knows he’s got him.
“I’ve met your friends,” He eventually acknowledges, “They’re good folk and all, but there isn’t anyone there I’d like to ‘get to know better’, yeah?”
“You haven’t met this one. She lives next door.”
The pause stretches longer this time. Dark eyes dart out into the hallway, and Wade can practically hear those rusted gears turning.
“Apartment 16 or 18?” Logan finally rasps, his arms crossing. 
Oh, he’s definitely got him. Just call him Wade Wilson, New York’s own personal Cupid. New life goal - get his friends laid. 
He nocks a mental arrow - aiming, and then firing with his answer. 
“18.” 
Another beat passes, and then a sigh. 
“Alright.” The leather sleeve slips from his arm, drooping in his fist.
“Five minutes. That’s all I’m staying.”
Wade’s fist pumps. 
Bullseye, motherfucker. 
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The apartment is packed and it’s been well past the allotted five minutes. Logan’s been nursing a beer for the last fifteen, eyes flicking over the people he’s grown to know well.
Offering a tight, half-smile when the big man claps him on the back, followed by Opposites Attract. Almost tempted to find that damn dog, just to have something to do. 
Or maybe, just bail all-together.
Starting to think this was all an elaborate prank. Some fucked up aspect of this Earth, unknown to him until now.
He’s too old for this shit. If he heads for the bedroom now, he might make it out the fire escape before anyone notices.
Logan is still entertaining this new thread of thought until he hears his name - called out over whatever fuck-face bullshit boy-band music Wade’s been playing. 
Ambiance, his ass.
The muscles of his crossed arms flex. Catching the way his roommate hauls a girl across the floor - the look of panic on her face as she tosses a container onto the nearest surface.
Wade hadn’t been lying, after all. It was Apartment 18 - that was about as much as he knew about you.
Other than the color of your eyes. The smell of your perfume in the hall. Your hair, your schedule - waking in the mornings to hear your door opening at 5 a.m., five days a week.
A baker. A damn good one, from the bits of cookie he’s snuck when no one was home. 
Had never thought to introduce himself, because he’s been through all this before. Knows better than to reach out in the first place - still nursing the old wound of heartache, one that still flares to life in his chest.
Better not to hope, or even think, at all. 
You stumble when he lets go, and Logan’s hands only curl tighter. Afraid to touch, now that you’re so close. 
A pretty young thing compared to him. This was a fucking stupid idea, his eyes darting away as Wade claps, his hands spreading wide. 
“Logan,” Wade’s tone is cordial, as if discussing the weather, “This is our neighbor, Sugar. She bakes a mean penis cake and likes emotionally unavailable men.”
A dejected sigh as he regards you, “Which is why it’s never worked out between us. I am just too available.”
Penis cake?
Logan shoots you a sideways look, an eyebrow cocked. Caught off guard by this unexpected intro, and it seems you are the same - gauging by the way your mouth drops open. 
Your face swimming with regret, as you hiss, “Oh my god. Wade. It was one time. Why do you have to put it like that?”
Wade’s smile widens, his tone still innocent, “Just skipping over the ‘getting-to-know-you’s, so you can know if you’re compatible.”
Already pivoting to face Logan with a little wink, his own scowl already deepening. Something like nerves flickering to life - as he wonders if this will all be over before it ever begins.
“And this is Logan. He’s from another Earth, is two-hundred years old, and has a metal dong.”
Jesus Christ. 
Logan’s teeth grit, before he snarls, “It’s not made of metal-”
Out of the corner of his eye, catches the curious dip of your gaze. Past the folded twist of his arms, the flannel, down to his thick belt buckle.
A knock rings out then, interrupting him from any further clarification.
“Ooh! Door,” Wade thumbs over his shoulder, “Go on now, we’ve got some good energy going here. Sugar and spice, I love it.”
A spin on his heel, and he’s leaving them alone. Silence a lingering companion for a long moment, before Logan turns.
“Nice to meet you.” He seethes, jaw working as he shoots daggers at Wade’s back. A hand extended - he’d manage that much at least.
Waiting for you to make an excuse and run, but all you do is fit your hand into his. Soft and strong and a near perfect fit.
Logan doesn’t touch people much anymore unless it’s a hand around a throat, or claws buried deep into a chest. Had almost forgotten what it was like, even if this meeting is close to his own personal version of hell.
“Nice to finally meet you, too.” Your smile is wry. Hands still clasped a moment longer, until he’s withdrawing. 
Your hands shove into your back pockets. The tilt of a head as you regard him, and he lets his eyes meet yours. 
They’re pretty, like the rest of you. Captivating even, if he could use such a word, and Wade’s words ring out in his head. 
She wants to meet you.
He’s wondering if that’s still true. Maybe you’re wondering the same, with the way you look at him. 
“So,” You begin, awkwardly - another unconscious flick of your eyes,“How does-”
“Uh-uh.” Logan’s head shakes. He’s picked up a couple things living with Wade. Never used to be a bargaining man, but he has to admit it has its uses. 
“If you wanna know, you gotta go first.” 
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He hates you.
He must, with the way he’s scowling. Thighs spread wide as he sits on the couch you had gestured to, fingers in a vice grip around the bottle. No doubt plotting a dozen ways to ditch you the second he can.
Who wouldn’t, with a meeting like this? You could kill Wade, cheeks burning as you sink into the worn cushions next to him.
That is, until your knee knocks against his. The muscles in his thigh flexing - but Logan lets it rest, instead of pulling away. 
“You gonna-?” His voice is gruff, a low rasp that makes goosebumps raise across your skin. 
“Uh, sure.” Your fingers twist, “Which part did you want to hear about?”
His eyebrows lift. Those dark eyes beneath, almost a hint of amusement in them.
“Right,” The little laugh that bubbles from you is self-conscious, “Well, I don’t really like emotionally unavailable men, they just have a habit of finding me.”
His voice is low, “How would Wade know that?”
“Mm, how would he know about your-?” Your eyes flicker down for the third time, and he shifts. 
“You first.”
“Alright.” You huff, but you’re smiling now. Some of your discomfort easing. 
Logan is even more handsome than you had thought. You like the way his eyes dart away, only to come back and linger. 
It’s starting to make you think that maybe it’s not dislike that has so much of him hidden away. Maybe it’s just been a long time since someone tried to peel any of him back. 
Maybe he’s as nervous as you are.
“Well, he’s had to scare an ex or two away.” You shrug, “He only knows because I told him. And the cake, oh-, that was him, too.”
You turn then, to face him. A shoulder brushing the arm he has thrown across the back of the couch, a flicker in his eyes as you get comfortable beside him.
“Well, Wade had gotten ripped in half a couple years ago,” You nose wrinkles, a wave of your hand, “And it all like, has to grow back, right? It’s so creepy.”
Logan grimaces at your explanation, and you wonder if he understands. You think he must - you had thought he was like Wade, in some ways. 
Different. Special.
“Well, he uh, finished growing everything in,” You make a sweeping gesture over your lower half, “And the next year to celebrate his dickiversary, he ordered a penis cake from my shop.”
“His… dickiversary.” Logan repeats slowly.
The heat is back in your cheeks, but you nod, “Yeah, because it like, it came back and all. And he paid in cash, I couldn’t say no.”
There’s the smallest twitch of Logan’s lips, and it feels like a victory.
“Right. What flavor was it?”
Your smile widens with relief, “Strawberries and cream. It was so good. I’ll have to make it for you sometime.”
A second before you cringe, adding, “I mean, a normal one. Not…”
He hums then, close to a laugh.  
“Sure. You do that.”
You smile, letting your shoulder bump his, “And with that… I think it’s your turn.”
The bit of humor in his expression flattens. A searching look thrown your way, before he inhales a breath.
Setting it free. 
“I’m a mutant.”
Logan waits there, as if expecting something. You only nod, thinking of the ones you know. Colossus, Ellie, Yukio, Domino. Wade. 
“Wade said you were similar to him. I had assumed-” You encourage, waiting.
“Right,” He seems relieved, some of the tension ebbing, “My powers are regenerative, like his. But unlike him, I have these-”
There’s the jerk of his wrist, and three sharp metal claws sprout from between his knuckles. Your gasp is caught in your throat as you cling to his flannel shirt - the surprise bleeding into worry. 
They glint in the light, as his fingers flex. 
“Adamantium instead of bones. All of me is like this.”
The claws sheath themselves inside him again. His wounds smoothing over seconds later, as he scrubs his knuckles across his jeans, wiping away blood. 
Offering out his hand, after. Letting your grip unwind from his shirt, and press against his skin instead. Feeling the tendons in his hand, his wrist. The skeleton beneath utterly unyielding, a weight to his limb that is so unlike your own.
“Metal…” You trail off, as pieces click into place, “I get it now. So does Wade really think there’s like, an actual bone-?”
Logan huffs again, “Guess so.”
You laugh then. A thought sobering you after, as a fingertip drifts up to the dip between his fingers. 
“But doesn’t that hurt?” 
It makes you wince to even think about it. Much less how casually they sprung from him, no different than breathing. 
He shrugs, and it’s heartbreaking.
“Doesn’t even phase me anymore.”
“And, the two hundred years,” Another facet you put together out loud, “You’re still alive because you keep healing? Will it be that way forever?”
His hand flexes in your grip.
“Not forever. Apparently my powers will run out, at some point.” His eyes meet yours, “The Logan in this world is dead. Wade pulled me from another.”
Your brow furrows - always trying to keep up with the snippets that Wade has told you across the years - stories about time-traveling and mutants and even how he came to be. But this seems too deep. Surely Logan must be joking.
“Another world, huh?” You ask, head tilting - trying your best to roll with it, “Won’t they miss you in yours?”
Only now does his face falter. That sharp mask cracking, as his hand pulls from yours. Resting again on the back edge of the couch - his answer low and rough. 
“No. I don’t think so.”
Another jolt racks through your heart. You don’t know him know him yet, but you already can’t believe that could possibly be true. Your fingers fan out, hovering - before it folds into a fist.
“Well then, I’m glad you’re here.”
He doesn’t reply. 
The room is darker now, dim with the setting of the sun. Street lights outside pouring in a golden beam that cuts across his face. 
His eyes are hazel, you can see that now. A fading rim of green spilling into the brown, beneath the near-permanent furrow of his eyebrows. 
Yours caught in the glow of the flamingo string lights that curl out from the kitchen, stapled to the walls.
He breaks the silence, the words coming slowly. 
“Let me ask you one more thing.” 
“Sure. You know some of my worst secrets already.” You smile, a shoulder lifting.
His hand twitches, where it rests near your shoulder. The tip of a finger ghosting against skin.
Just the slightest brush but it feels like it radiates out, lingering after.
“Why’d you tell Wade you wanted to meet me?” 
His voice is still low, rough. But it’s lost that sharp edge. The combination has your stomach tied up in knots, suddenly more nervous that you’ve been the whole night.
Surely he must know? 
“Well…” You hedge. It’s your turn to look away, but then there’s the brush of his fingers again.
“Because I did want to meet you.” You admit, “You, you seemed like someone I wanted to get to know. In whatever capacity you’d like.”
“Is that right, Sugar?” Logan husks, and the nickname sounds even sweeter on his tongue, stealing your breath.
All you can do is nod, as his eyes darken. 
Voices rise behind you, ripping you out of this little bubble you’ve found yourself in. Nearly forgetting just how many people are here, how many eyes have been glancing your way since you’ve arrived.
“Not strip poker Wade, please.” The rough rumbling plea of Colossus’s voice rings out above the others, “You never wear anything under the suit-”
You didn’t even realize when he had changed, but he had - patches of bare skin on his ass showing through the holes. Your nose scrunches, before you turn back to realize that Logan’s eyes are still on you.
Dropping when your tongue peeks out to wet your lips - your words coming out in a soft hush. 
“You want to get out of here?”
You want him. You can only hope that he might just want you, too.
The corner of his lip twitches.
“Thought you’d never ask.”
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It’s strange to have someone like Logan in your space. You can remember the last time you’ve wanted someone here.
His fingers still entwined with yours, from where you had reached back for him. Leading him through the dim corners of the room.
Thinking you had made it, only for the rousing cheers to rise when you had cracked the door open to slip through.
His grip tightening when you made to tug your hand free, in an urge to press it against burning cheeks. Letting you fumble with one hand, to open the lock next door.
It’s quieter here. A low echo of the music next door, as the darkness wraps around you again.
Here, his fingers move, but it’s only to skim up your wrist. To tug you between him and the front door, until your back presses against it. 
His nose brushes yours as he steps into your space, your lips already parting. Holding himself there for a moment, inhaling the scent of you as his arm braces above your head.
Leaving you to be the one that closes the gap. The tilt of your head and the press of your lips against his.
A rough hum when your arms wrap around his neck, fingers buried in his hair. His hand gripping at your waist, pulling your hips against his.
Tugging and pushing. A messy path from the front door through the small living room - a mirror-image of the apartment next door.
Through to the bedroom, wandering hands and the brush of his tongue against yours as he deepens the needy kiss. Until his knees are hitting the edge of your bed, and he’s letting you nudge him back onto the mattress.
He brings you with him - your hips cradling his as you settle yourself astride him. Hands flatten against his chest as you rock down - drawing a rough, mumbled “fuck”.
Grinding yourself down where he’s hard, the curve of his cock straining against his jeans. Letting your hands follow, as his own cup your ass. Squeezing, before slipping to press the heel of his hand against the seam at your clit.
You moan into his mouth, as your fingers curl around him. Eyes blown wide when you pull back, scooting your hips down. 
It’s here that he comes back to himself. 
Going tense as you fit yourself between his thighs, fingers at this belt as the other still cups him.
“You shouldn’t want this.” He rasps, those eyes glinting in the dark, “A man like me. You know that, right?”
Propping himself up on an elbow, so he can see your expression. So you can see the way his jaw grits, nostrils flaring. 
It’s a warning, wrapped up in silk. A last ditch effort to scare you away - knowing that once he has you, he won’t want to stop.
Your fingers slow - his zipper half-undone, baring skin and a dark shadow of hair beneath. 
The other pulling away, “You want me to stop?” 
He catches your wrist, jerking your hand back. His hips bucking into your palm, grinding himself into your touch. 
“The last thing I want to fucking do is stop.” It’s almost a growl, “But on my Earth, I-”
You sigh then, impatient, “Logan, this Earth isn’t all that great either. I lost five years of my life to the blip.”
He frowns, not understanding - but your head shakes as you continue, “I’m tired of being too scared to take chances. I’ve been trying to live each day to the fullest, and I’d like to end this one with you.”
And out of everyone - Logan knows a little something about second chances.
“Yeah,” He manages - the grip of his fist leaves you, “Yeah, okay.”
"Thank you,” You answer primly, just as you finish yanking the zipper down. 
His hand beats you in the race to ease himself out, fingers curling around the base. You can’t help it - you inhale a breath at the sight of him.
Heavy, with the way the flushed tip bobs in his grip. Thick enough that you’re already wondering if you’re going to be able to take him. 
The huff he makes turns into a groan as you start small - engulfing the leaking head with your lips. The first inch turns into another as his hips lift, feeding his cock into your waiting mouth. 
Only when he’s halfway inside you, bumping against your throat, does his hand drop. Letting you replace it with your own - squeezing, as drool slicks up his shaft. Your head bobbing in time with the twist of your fist.
That brief hesitance is quickly forgotten. Fingers brush at your cheek, curling around the base of your head as he guides you.
Leaving you eager for more. Another hissed groan when your mouth leaves him, your hand loosening as you strip your clothes away.
“Oh fuck yes,” He coaxes, when he realizes what you’re doing, “Let me see you, baby.” 
Your shirt and pants left to pool on the floor. A second of boldness as you unclasp your bra next, leaving you in your panties as you focus on his cock again. 
A bitten-back moan when your tongue slips across his swollen shaft - an low throb between your thighs as you rub them together, clenching around nothing. Resisting the urge to slip your hand beneath the hem to ease the ache. 
Instead, your keep your hands on him. Goosebumps raising as your nails scratch against the deep v of muscle at his hips. The others working him into your mouth, as he slowly comes more undone. 
His hips flex with each bob of your head, lips parted as he pants. The words a rough mumble, becoming almost desperate. 
“That’s it sweetheart.”
Another moan when you take him deep, hollowing your cheeks as you suck, “Oh fuck, gonna fill that pretty mouth.”
His hand cups your jaw, holding you steady as he bucks into your mouth. Those dark eyes fixed on you in wonder, all that pretty skin bared for him to touch, to taste. He’s mesmerizing like this - the weight of gaze. Jaw slack with pleasure, eyes aflame.
You did this to him. 
It sends something warm flooding through you, as his eyelashes flutter. The tipping back of his head, muscles ticking in his cheek as his teeth ground down. 
A sound still slips between them, as he floods your mouth with the next flex of his hips. Pulsing between your lips as you swallow him down, a choked sound ripping from his chest when you cup his sack to gently squeeze out every last drop. 
Logan melts into the mattress after, an arm thrown over his eyes as he catches his breath. His gaze focusing on you when he feels you squirm - dark, and hungry.
A lithe stretch of muscles as he moves - legs easing from beneath you. 
“Hands and knees,” He commands, head tipping towards the bed next to him, as he rolls off. Kicking off his jeans as you listen, watching over a shoulder as the flannel and white tank underneath joins your clothes on the floor.
Your eyes widen at how toned he is - muscles rippling, the bed dipping as he fits himself behind you.
His broad hand at the small of your back, pushing your torso down against the mattress. A pleased hum then, fingers trailing just along the elastic edge of your underwear.
“Could smell how much she needed this.” The tips of two press against the damp fabric between your thighs, making you gasp, “Even next door. You want it that bad?”
It should be embarrassing that he could tell how much you desired him, but at the moment all you can think about is him touching you more.
“Yes,” You agree, “Please, Logan.”
“So fuckin’ polite,” The fingers withdraw; but only so his nose can replace them. A ragged inhale, just before his tongue drags against your clothed slit.
A groan against your skin as you cry out, before a finger hooks around the fabric, baring you for him to taste.
The heat of his tongue flattens against you - lapping at where you drip with need, a rough rumble in his chest. 
“Sweet, too.” Another flick of his tongue, “Your name. ‘s fitting.”
You can’t manage words. Only his name, muffled against the sheets as your fists twist in them. Back arched as you resist the urge to grind yourself against his tongue, as it flicks against your clit.
It’s messy, how he eats you. You don’t think you’ve even had someone take you like this. Hungry, desperate even, as he devours you. The rumble of a groan against your cunt as his tongue delves inside you, stretching you open. Letting your slick smear into his beard, with how close he presses his mouth.
That need inside you thrumming. Winding tighter as he yanks your panties down your thighs. His palm flattening against your ass, holding you open as he licks you from clit to hole, then higher. Humming as you squeak, when his tongue flattens against your tight rim. 
A thick finger nudging against you then, as his tongue dips back to your clit. There’s no resistance as it slips deeper, into slick walls that clamp down around him.  It’s what you needed - that little bit more.
Unable to help rocking into the crook of his finger now. Whining when a second joins it, spearing deep and curling. Dragging against your walls, loud and wet and filthy with each plunge. 
Your whimpers only grow louder. Needier, as his lips wrap around your clit. Fingers pounding deep, stretching you out. Leaving you babbling, your words slipping together. 
“Don’t fucking stop.” Tears prick at your eyes, each breath a rattling gasp, “Oh my god you’re gonna make me come-”
He has you gushing, with the next flick of his tongue. A pleased groan as he feels your pussy tighten around his fingers, hearing the wail that is muffled into your pillows. That sharp pace slowing, his thumb replacing his tongue to draw your orgasm out until your legs are shaking. 
His fingers sticky when they pull from you, only to slip between his lips - tongue curling around his knuckles, sucking them clean.
It leaves you floating above yourself. You can’t remember ever coming this hard, even by yourself. Only the tintest thread of disappointment as you drift, and it’s only that you won’t get the pleasure of his cock filling you tonight.
You would’ve liked to see what he can do with the rest of him. 
Perhaps you can convince him to stay until morning.
But he moves behind you, instead. His knee pressing against yours, spreading your legs further. The rhythmic shuffle of skin against skin, as his hand slips from between his lips to fist around his cock. 
“Tell me I can fuck you.” It’s not a plea, not with the harsh rasp of his voice. But it’s as close as you’ve heard, as he swipes the tip against your leaking pussy.
Smearing your slick on him, teasing at your waiting hole.
You don’t know how he’s hard again, but at the moment you really don’t care. Not sure if you’ve ever felt a need like this, your back arching further as you present yourself to him. 
A twist of your neck, so your eyes can meet his. 
“Fuck me, Logan.” 
He groans, broad hands squeezing at your ass. Slipping up to sink his fingers into the flesh at your hips. Holding you steady as he lines himself up. 
Your breath held, when you feel his cock start to breach you - muscles stringing tight.
“Relax, sweetheart,” He grits out, though not unkindly, “You can take it.”
Trying to hold himself back from filling you with a single thrust, with the way you’re already gripping him.
Easing himself into your heat. Two inches forward and then one back, and with each one you think you’ll feel the press of his thighs against yours. A low whine as your cunt makes room for him, that sharp stretch as it feels like he’s reaching into your belly.
Feeling full when he finally is flush, the weight of his sack kissing against your clit. His shoulders following the curve of your back, as a hand slips up to plant next to your head.
“Feels fucking incredible,” It’s mumbled against your skin, almost as if it hadn’t meant to say it. 
“Mm,” You grin, your face tipping up to his, “Should’ve met you weeks ago.”
He smirks, a low sound in his throat as his mouth presses to yours. Starting a slow rhythm that drags his cock against your walls. Slipping until he’s halfway out, only to sheath himself again. Pushing the air from your lungs as he flattens himself, knees digging into the bed as your thigh spread wider - forcing him deeper.
It’s almost too much. 
You hand shoots out, reaching. Wrapping around his wrist, nails biting against his skin. 
It feels like he’s surrounding you. Each thrust a heavy weight that presses you into the bed. Splitting you open, until all you can do is squirm beneath him.
That pressure in your belly building again, as his hips pound. His breath, hot and panting in your ear as he chases his own end.
“Fuck, Logan.” You sob, “Harder-”
His tendons flex under your grip. Knuckles pressing flat against the sheets as he makes a rough sound in his throat. 
Those claws unsheathing with his next thrust. Punching down into your mattress. Anchoring as he loses himself to the feel of you beneath him.
How tight and wet and warm you are, your arousal still sweet on his tongue. Fighting the urge to sink his teeth into your throat, as everything tightens up inside him.
“Sweetheart.” It’s a warning, rasped out. 
“Come in me,” You whine, “Wanna feel you.”
He does growl then, at the thought of filling you to the brim, until he's leaking out of your pretty little pussy. Hips snapping faster, pinning you to the bed as he ruts into you. Each squeak of the bed paired with the sharp rip of fabric as his claws dig in. 
Feeling how your body strings tight beneath him, how you clench down in anticipation. Wanting to feel you once more, before he gives in to his own desires.
“Come on, baby,” It’s hushed, murmured against your skin, “Fuckin’ give it to me-”
The sharp point of a canine scraping against your skin, his groan rough and throaty in your ear. 
Your fingers work down to wedge themselves between your thighs. The tips brushing where you’re speared open, before circling your clit like his tongue had.
He has you mindless. Fucked out - that soft glow from your earlier orgasm shining bright as he tips you towards a second.
Burning at that tightly wound thread inside you, until the ends fray, and then snap. 
It has you coming with his next thrust. A wail ripped from you as he buries himself deep, feeling the way your pussy clenches down around him. 
Fingers still swirling, drawing out the deep pulses that fan out from your core as your toes curl, vision going hazy.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” He rasps, those sharp thrust slowing to a sloppy grind, “Make a fucking mess for me, there you go-”
Panting, as he groans. Another roll of his hips before he’s coming with you - teeth bruising skin as they sink into your shoulder. The sound he makes is broken as he spills into you, muscles clenching with each pulse that paints your walls.  
Marking you thoroughly with teeth and come, the saw of his hips slowing until you both finally go still. A breath finally caught. 
Blissed out, when he rolls you both to the side. His thighs still mapping yours, cock still notched deep. A thick arm thrown across your waist, his breath ragged in your ear as he catches his breath.
Your fingers drift, as you bask in your afterglow. Dipping into the rips in your mattress, knuckle deep.
There’s a grunt as you wiggle, the words low in your ear, “I’ll get you another, sweetheart. Just lost control for a moment.”
The thought doesn’t bother you as much as you’d think. In fact, you wouldn’t mind if happened again.
Only as your imagination runs wild, do you hear the muffled moan from the brick wall behind you.
“Fuck, that’s good.”
Dramatic and drawn out, paired with faint rhythmic noise. 
A beat - before you hear mumbled protesting. The voice of someone talking with their mouth full, “No. Back the fuck off Peter, I’m not going to share.” 
Eating. The fucker was eating his end of the bargain, ear pressed to the wall.
The next louder, “Alright, pay up everyone, Operation ‘Get Sugar Some Sugar’ was a success!”
You grimace, eyes rolling. Logan grunts behind you, the words mumbled out sleepily.
“Wish I could sew that goddamn mouth shut.”
There’s a faint “they already tried that!” before Logan’s fist bangs on the wall, shutting him up.
But you can’t help the smile. Your fingers fitting between the ones that rest just below your breasts, squeezing.
“He’s not so bad,” You admit, “Wade, I mean.”
Logan groans, “Don’t say his name while I’m fucking you.”
“You’re-” You start - but then you can feel him.
Still hard - as his hips cant slowly against yours. Your joined hands slip up to cup a breast - as his lips press against your neck, stubble scraping you skin.
“Again?” You breathe, disbelieving that he’d be up for a third time - your hips rocking back to meet his. The sound lewd with how he drips from you - but it only has him grinding himself deeper, “You sure you’re two hundred?”
“Regenerative powers, sweetheart.” Logan husks, the flash of teeth with a knowing smirk.
“Can’t say it doesn’t come with perks.”
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I used to have the biggest fucking crush on wolverine, haha - so fun to watch a new movie with him!! 👀💕 thank you so much for reading! And please me know if you'd like to read any more for him! (like more one-shots,etc!)
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ozarkthedog · 9 months ago
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𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝
summary: the world crumbled before you could experience the touch of another. Joel does his best to keep you innocent for as long as he can.
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pairing: Jackson!Joel Miller x afab virgin!reader.
warnings: 18+ mdni. established, undefined relationship. PUSSY RUBBING. fluids galore. just the tip. perv!joel. unspecified age gap. fingering. dirty talk. overstimulation. male masturbation. FEELS. Joel is a conflicted old man. reader is able bodied. no Ellie. w.c. 2.9k
an: i watched a porn clip and instantly went rabid thinking about jackson!joel.
-> follow up to a glimpse of heaven but it's not necessary to read the first part.
𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 ⋅ 𝐅𝐢𝐜 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐬 ⋅ ��𝐨𝐞𝐥 𝐌𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭
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Like most of Jackson, the house you share with Joel is quiet and calm when night falls. Rain softly patters against the window as you lie in bed, wide awake. Another night of fruitless sleep under your belt.
You huff irritatedly, your hand collapsing against the mattress as you bitterly kick your bedspread onto the floor. Your oversized shirt clings to your body, your skin dewy from the exertion, and you're close to crying. Your limbs are wrought and overworked after hours of touching yourself with no orgasm to show for it.
Your hand won't cut it; it isn't enough. It can't reach all those sensitive spots that make you float among the stars.
Warmth pools in your abdomen as you think of one that's the perfect size.
A hazy hue of yellow light pours under your bedroom door as it spills from the room across the hall.
Joel.
It takes a long time to get to know someone, but they tend to meld with your soul once you do in one way or another.
From the start, Joel was intimidating. He was so frayed around the edges that you were afraid he'd completely unravel in the middle of your journey. He didn't seem to care for your company as the two of you traveled across the plains to Jackson, hesitation poisoning every fiber of your being, but you kept on with the strange man since no one else was willing to trek across the states. You desperately needed a new life, a fresh start away from the Boston QZ, and Jackson sounded like the perfect spot.
Over time, Joel opened up, conversing little by little as you drove for miles across the now barren US. Usually, after you had a close call with raiders or the lone gunman, he'd go silent, the weight of protecting someone other than himself sinking further into his soul, consuming that much further.
What you never expected was for him to be your first touch.
Sweltering tension slowly grew like a wildfire. Catching each other's curious stares, lingering fingers, and salacious banter until, one night, he slid a cautious hand into your panties. He claimed your untouched sex when you confessed over a roaring fire and a bottle of whiskey that you'd never been with another. His weathered hands were gentle as he sunk his fingers into your core, watching with rabid fascination as you came for the first time, gasping from his touch.
The following day, as he drove you across the interstate with the sun slowly rising, he made sure you knew that wouldn't happen again. "I'm much too old. Don't wanna waste your time with a mean ol' grump like me."
You didn't bring it up again.
One month after settling into Jackson, picking bedrooms, and deciding who would do which chores, Joel had his first taste of you.
It wasn't supposed to happen.
You chewed your dinner slowly in the modestly sized dining room across from Joel. You were so lost in thought that he was concerned enough to ask what was wrong.
"What does it mean when a man eats you out?" you naively pondered, causing him to choke on his veggies.
Joel had never looked so red before as he took a long drink of whiskey. You instantly apologized, explaining that you overheard a group of women conversing while you tended the communal garden.
He raised a hand, curbing your frantic rambles. "S'ok. Figured you'd be learnin' things. Just didn' think I'd be the one you'd ask."
"But I trust you."
His jaw twitched at your words.  
Later that night, Joel fell to his knees at the edge of your bed and tossed your legs over his broad shoulders. "Never tasted a pussy so sweet," he mumbled against your glistening folds as you ran your fingers through his graying curls. You came multiple times on his tongue, grinding his whiskered jaw while he hungrily lapped at your soaked folds like he was dying of thirst.
You didn't bring it up again.
It's warmer in Jackson now. The sun hangs longer in the sky. Snow boots and jackets are stowed away until the next freeze.
You slink from the warmth of your bed and pad sockless across the hall. Lightening flickers brightly under the starry sky. The night rain storm slowly whirls through the city, soaking everything in its path.
Joel's door is open. A soft smile tugs at your lips; it's his way of saying he's still up. He keeps it ajar while he reads before rolling onto his side and bidding goodnight to the world.
Three soft knocks alert Joel from the guitar-building manual he's currently reading. Dread clouds his mind for a moment, wondering why you'd be knocking on his door at this time of night, but he takes a deep breath and grounds himself in the softness of his bed.
"Yeah?" he calls out. His tone is rough around the edges after a long day on patrol.
You poke your head around the door with a timid smirk. He looks at you over his reading glasses before marking his spot and laying his book on the side table.
You don't say anything as you stride into his room. He notices your oversized shirt swaying at your knees before you climb into his bed and curl against his side like a cat. 
He drapes an arm around your shoulder, unconsciously pulling you closer.
"'Nother bad dream?" he questions with a low rumble.
You shake your head. "Can't sleep."
You nuzzle your face into the crook of his shoulder and feel him nod, understanding the endless struggle for a night of peaceful sleep. It's improved since moving to Jackson, but the dreams never end.
Silence fills the bedroom except for the soft pitter-patter of rain against the roof. Joel leans against the headboard, sighs through his nose, and lets his thoughts drift. He's content to sit with you in his arms for as long as possible, even if that makes him selfish.
He wonders if you hope to find someone to settle down with, someone less ridged and mentally maimed, someone less him.
The thought drives a stake through his heart.
He'd be crazy to say he didn't love being around you. Your laugh and lopsided smile took the first brick out of his impenetrable fortress when you spied a deer and her calf frolicking in an open field in Kansas. From then on, it became easier for him to let his walls down.
When you came to him with those big doe eyes and urges about wanting to know what it's like to be touched and desired, he gave in each time despite his reasoning.
He would masturbate each time after getting his hands on you, also thinking about the early days when he'd catch glimpses of you changing or the time he first saw you naked while showering at the YMCA. 
He's still trying to figure out what to make of you. Friends? Lovers? He certainly didn't mean to fall head over heels. Love had no place in his heart, but he'd be a fool to say he wasn't extremely fond of you.
"Can you make me feel good again?" your lithe voice broke the silence.
Joel stops breathing. Your question doused him like a cold bucket of water. He knew this would come back and haunt him.
His hand curls tight around your shoulder as he wrestles with the devil on his shoulder. "Told ya we shouldn't keep doin' this, Sweetheart," he reasons, trying not to break your heart.
"But I can't make myself feel as good as when you've done it. I've tried!" You whine, burying your face into his chest.
"S'not that I don't wanna," he admits, soothing your soft cries. "S'just, you're too precious to do that wit' someone like me."
You lift your head and brazenly brush your lips against the exposed skin of his collarbone, earning a low groan as he curls a large hand around the back of your neck. He tugs you away from his skin, your lips still forming a tight 'O', and pins you with a stern gaze.
"Joel, it hurts." Your watery eyes and trembling bottom lip are his downfall.
"Lay back, Sweetheart, and spread your legs," he orders with a husky tone.
You don't make a noise; too afraid he'll stop if you do. Your cunt beats against the gusset of your panties as you lay on your back, spreading and bending both legs at the knee, just like he taught you.
A warm breath fans down your face as he shifts down your body before kneeling between your legs and tracing teasing fingers over your covered mound. His nails lightly scratch along the worn cotton, making you suck in a frantic breath. He slips a practiced hand beneath the crotch of your panties and deftly explores your folds, gently rubbing small circles on your clit after wetting his fingers with the arousal that's pouring from your cunt.
"Oh, she's achin' real bad, huh?" he groans as your opening clenches beneath his wandering touch.
"Joel, please, I need-" You gasp, hips wantonly grinding against his hand, desperate for any type of friction.
The muscles in his jaw ache. It's only natural you'd be wanting more.
Before he thinks twice, Joel draws his cock out from his sweatpants. Your stomach cramps at the sight as it smacks against his belly; he's massive.
His cock hangs heavy between his thighs like a solid, dangerous threat. It weeps from the dusky tip, shiny liquid dripping from the crown as he squeezes his hand around the girthy base peppered with dark gray, wiry hair.
"Got somethin' that'll make you feel good, sweet girl." he grits, tapping his cock against the covered crux of your pussy. It thwaps devastatingly against your clit, forcing a gasp from your lips as mind-numbing pleasure races up your spine and leaves you staring dumbly up at him.
"S'that what you need? Need my cock to keep 'er from achin so bad'?" his cock is searing as it lies in wait atop your panty-clad mound. You swear you can feel his blood pumping steadily into his shaft.
He cautiously thrusts his hips, sliding his length along your cotton-covered mound. Your slick arousal seeps thru the material, wetting the thin cotton and creating a sensuous touch as he glides along your cunt.
He shoves your shirt up over your chest, exposing your breasts to his hungry gaze. He licks his lips, "Such'a beauty."
Your cheeks flame at his words. Having such a man say things about you makes you lightheaded.
Joel groans as your panties practically are now see-through from your combined fluids staining the cotton, "Oh, baby." You whine at his pet name. "I got ya. Keep those legs open, just like I taught ya. S'good girl."
He keeps a steady pace, sawing back and forth over your extremely soaked mound. Your puffy pussy lips stick to the soaked cotton, leaving nothing to Joel's imagination. He glides easily along your slit, your juices smoothing his path until your arching your back and chanting his name like a prayer.
Watching you orgasm under his touch is enough to drive him wild. He throws all sense of logic out the window. He's okay with being selfish again.
"Let's get these off, yeah." He hooks two fingers under the elastic and slides your panties off before his words register in your euphoric haze. "Feel even better without 'em."
He swallows hard at the sight laid out before him. The sheets splay and curve around your naked body, making you look like an ethereal being sent to test his limits.
"Gonna give 'er a kiss, Sweetheart," his deep timbre vibrates your body as he draws close and touches the bulbous tip of his cock to your exposed folds. Blood rushes to your cunt instantly, bordering on the edge of pain. You cry out from the intense contact, and arousal slips freely down your crack as he traces his cockhead up and down your soaked slit.
"How's she feel?" He anchors his head, looking down at you from under his lashes.
"S'nice," you half whisper, half moan. The wanton bliss slowly consumes you the more he rubs against your sticky folds, keeping a hand locked around his girthy base, his crown glistening with your combined arousal.
Your eyes tear open, back arching like a bow, when he cants his hips and taps his cock square in the center of your cunt.
"M'not gonna fuck you, sweet girl, wanna keep you whole," he declares, holding true to his word despite the overwhelming need to claim you.
He can't be the one to sully you. "Ain' much left'a this world that's as sweet n' pure as you."
Your core quivers as his dusky, throbbing crown glides along your glistening seam. He tentatively explores uncharted areas, brows furrowed with concentration, fighting with inner demons who want to claim, corrupt, and mold you for only his touch.
His name leaves your lips with a mess of desperate, frustrated moans, "Please, Joel."
He snaps out of his haze. He's done almost everything he can to keep you safe and protected in this new way of life. He'll be damned if he doesn't grant you anything you ask for.
"S'hurtin' somethin' fierce, huh?" He grunts, angling his hips until his cock lines up with your fluttering hole. "Bet she needs somethin' big'er than fingers to ease 'er throbbin'."
His cock catches on your opening, forcing a hiss through his clenched teeth. As tight as you are, he can't stop from pushing into your warmth. He blocks out any sense of reasoning that's shouting from the back of his mind as he slowly nudges his cock into your weeping, inviting hole.
Joel goes brain-dumb momentarily, watching in immoral awe as your core ever so slowly swallows his fat tip and breaches your quivering hole, forcing a raspy whine from your throat.
So warm, safe, and wet.
Joel's never felt anything like you. He wants to bury himself, slide his cock as deep as he can, claim every inch, endlessly fill you with his cum, and keep you only for him.
You frantically reach for him, hands clutching the air as he rubs a callous thumb over your clit while keeping a steady hold on the base of his cock.
"S'all she's gonna get," he states, returning to his senses and hissing when your cunt tightens. "S'just the tip."
A soft begging whine bubbles from your lips as you extend your arms, needing something solid to hold before latching onto his wrists.
Your hips move on their own, desperate to feel his length completely shunted in your velvet warmth, but brute hands envelop your hips and pin them to the bed.
He shakes his head, salt and pepper curls fraying across his forehead. "Don' be greedy now." He tuts, narrowing his gaze down at you.
A garbled mess of nonsense tumbles from your lips as your fingernails dig into his muscular, hairy forearms.
"I know. S'big, huh?" He lands a solemn thumb on your clit, rubbing tender circles around the tiny bud. "Stay wit' me, sweet girl. Wanna feel you come on my cock."
Your mind spins. It's all too much, and yet, not enough. Your head tosses from side to side, and you're frantic to survive, breathing hard and fast, waiting for the drop to come and, at the same time, never wanting it to come.
"Don't I deserve it? Keepin' you safe all this time." Joel muses, stroking his cock in time with his teasing thumb. His eyes never leave where he's splitting you open. He's barely penetrating you, but it's enough to know if he had, you'd be struggling to take him.
"Come on, Sweetheart. Let go f'me," he urges, his touch growing faster. Severe, tightly drawn circles tease you closer to the edge.
Your stomach flips. A heaviness settles in your throat, your heart lodging in the tight confines, your blood pumping faster and faster. A lithe whine slithers free, escaping into the dimly lit room and burrows into Joel's mind.
His jaw clenches, and a dark growl rumbles from his chest, "Thatta' girl. Make'a fuckin' mess'a me."
Your dripping hole quivers and throbs around his swollen tip as you come with a silent scream, body locking taut, trying its best to engulf his length entirely.
Joel curses, jerking his length with long, steady tugs and rubbing his weeping, cream-covered tip around your soaked folds before his spine goes straight, and he yanks his cock from your core, curling in on himself and spilling his seed all over your belly with a deep, gravelly moan.
You sag into his sheets, spent with a shiny thin layer of dew and white ropes of spend painted across your abdomen.
"Shit." Joel curses, breathing heavily as he holds himself by his hands, which press into the mattress by your head, keeping you locked beneath him.
You hold his studious gaze. His dark eyes ruminate, tinged with mood, as his gaze drills down into your very core, threatening to demolish your soul. You resign that this was nothing special. Just another night you won't talk about again.  
Joel eases off of you with a grunt, his bones aching from the tension despite the brief, pleasurable relief, and tucks his cock back away into his sweatpants. He shuffles to the bathroom momentarily before returning with a damp washcloth.
He wipes the cloth over your belly and between your thighs, cleaning the combined arousal from your skin before chucking the rag into the hamper with a sigh.
"I know," you mutter, grimacing as you roll onto your side and sit up, tugging your shirt down. "I won't mention it again."
A solid, warm hand on your shoulder stops your retreat. "Stay," Joel whispers with soft, yearning eyes. "I wan' you to stay, sweet girl."
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feel free to scream at me -> 💌
reblogs & comments are extremely appreciated! follow @ozzieslibrary for new fic updates!
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snail-day · 2 months ago
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It’s hard to argue with Suguru.
Not like it is with Satoru, who fights loud, two tempers crashing, both of you saying things you don’t mean but at least saying something. At least with Satoru, everything’s out in the open. Honest. Even when it hurts.
Suguru is different.
He doesn’t yell. He doesn’t combat your words. He just... tightens. Folds inward. Smiles a little too tightly, makes your coffee just the way you like it, overplans your days to “help.” He does everything for you, but never with you. He says he wants peace. Harmony. Love. At first, it felt like being cherished. Now it feels like you’re being caged. Never actually tells you what’s wrong. He’ll go passive-aggressive, clean the entire kitchen in silence, disappear into his thoughts for hours while insisting he’s fine. He’ll bottle everything up until you’re the only one spilling over. Until you look like the one who’s too much.
You try to bring it up - you try. That you feel smothered. That he never talks to you. That his silence makes you feel like you're the only one bleeding while he stands there pretending he’s not even scratched.
But he doesn’t respond. Doesn’t argue. Doesn’t even look at you. Just sits there, staring at the floor, leg bouncing, fists tight on his lap like it physically pains him to have this conversation. You hate raising your voice. But you feel like you’re screaming into a void.
And when you finally slam the bedroom door shut, frames rattling, it’s not because you’re angry. It’s because he stopped trying. He stopped meeting you halfway. Stopped seeing you.
He doesn’t follow, just sits there, biting back the tears. Biting down the words he wants to say but doesn’t know how. “Please don’t go. Please don’t leave me. Please tell me how to fix this.” But nothing comes out.
Because if he lets the fire out, he’s afraid there’ll be nothing left.
Hours later, when the house is dark and your breathing’s turned soft in the guest room, he creeps in. Picks you up carefully, warm palms slipping underneath you. Carries you back to your shared bed. You stir, but don’t wake, and he thinks maybe that’s a blessing.
Pulls you close, tucks you against his chest, arms wrapped around you like he’s trying to glue the pieces back together without you noticing. Then, quietly, he cries. Doesn’t sob. Doesn’t shake the bed. Just lets the tears roll down his cheeks, one by one, into your hair. His fingers curl tightly into your shirt. His chest rises and falls with the kind of grief he’s never spoken aloud.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, again and again, voice hoarse. “I’m sorry I make it so hard to love me. I’m sorry I keep breaking things. I don’t know how to stop.”
You don’t move. Maybe you’re still asleep. Maybe you’re pretending.
He doesn’t mean to cry. He’s so careful, always so careful, with you, with the house, with the weight of everything he carries but never speaks about. But when he lays you down in the bed, when you shift just slightly and curl instinctively toward him even in sleep, something in him buckles. Brushes the hair from your face with trembling fingers. The pad of his thumb drags gently beneath your eye, wiping away the last of your tears, but his own are already falling.
His broad shoulders start to shake, just barely, like he’s trying to hold even his grief in check. A soft, broken breath leaves him, one he bites down on so hard it sounds more like a choke than a sob.
“I don’t know how to keep you,” he whispers, voice raw. “I don’t know how to stop ruining it.” Closing his eyes, pressing his face into the curve of your neck. Tries to breathe you in like you’re still his. Like he hasn’t already pushed you too far.
“I just wanted to make it perfect. I thought if I could just... if I could make everything perfect, then maybe you'd stay. That nothing would go wrong.”
He swallows another sob, muffles it into your skin. Every apology he didn’t say earlier pours out in pieces now, scattered and soft and full of everything he buried beneath that calm mask.
“I’m sorry I don’t know how to talk. I’m sorry I make you feel small. I just - ” his voice breaks again, “ - I was so scared. I’m always scared.”
He thinks you’re asleep. Thinks you don't feel the way his strong body trembles. Doesn’t know you’re awake now, barely breathing, listening to the truth he only speaks in quiet moments. You realize he’s not trying to control you out of malice.
He’s just a man surrounded by love, who never actually learned how to love.
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iggyywrites · 9 months ago
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Keep Up!
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Pairings: Wolverine/Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader
Summary: Logan knew moving in with Wade was going to be a bad idea….his next door neighbor doesn’t help with that either
Warnings: 18+ fic, fem!reader, angst, hurt/comfort, smut, age gap (reader is in her 20s), mentions of alcohol, male masturbation, Logan listens to reader getting fucked, daddy kink, Logan fingers reader, p in v penetration, creampie, making out, nipple play.
An: No one make fun of me for not being able to do Wade’s witty remarks justice, I am just a girl.
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Logan knew this wasn’t a good idea.
There was virtually no timeline that existed currently where living with Wade fucking Wilson was a good idea for Logan. He could barely handle speaking to him for thirty minutes, let alone sharing a living space with him.
However, behind the man’s rapid fire tongue that had a copious amount of shit talking to go with it, he was genuine, and as much as Logan hated to admit it…
He didn’t really have anyone in this timeline but Wade.
So, after quite a bit of groaning and grumbling under his own breath, he finally agreed to moving in with Wade, which didn’t take long at all, seeing as he came to this timeline against his will with nothing but his bright yellow hero suit on his body.
To Logan’s surprise, things weren’t terrible his first week there. Wade was annoying, that much was true and inevitable, however he had his own shit to do, which had him out of Logan’s hair most of the time, leaving him all on his own in the tiny two bedroom apartment.
Logan was starting to realize that maybe all of this wasn’t as bad as he cut it out to be. Things started to feel particularly good on the Friday night following the end of his first week there. Wade was nowhere to be found, he had the living room to himself and a nice bottle of whiskey to grant him the sweetest dreams (or lack there of) meaning he could simply enjoy his own company in the comfort of silence that was rare living with Wade. He sighed softly as he sat back, legs spread wide as he took a sip of his drink, sinking down into the couch in a pool of pure bliss-
A knock at the door ripped him away from all of that almost immediately.
He groaned softly, lifting his head as he turned to look at the door, brows furrowed for a moment as he silently threatened whoever it was behind it to knock it again. When they did, he turned his head in the opposite direction to face the clock on the wall, noticing that it was already going into the later hours of the night.
No one should be knocking their door this late.
By the third round of knocks to the door, Logan was fixing his posture, annoyance coursing through his veins at the disruption of his night. Whoever it was that was choosing to knock this many times on their door was in for it at this point.
However, Wade was beating him to it. The man swiftly slipped past Logan, pushing the older man back down into the couch, forcing Logan to fall back with a low groan, the gesture not helping with his growing annoyance.
“She’s here! She’s here!” Wade squealed out like an excited child, skipping and clapping his hands together as he made his way to the door.
“Who the fuck is that-“ Logan’s words were cut off but Wade practically hissing at the man as he whipped his head around to face him.
“Keep your fucking voice down! This is one of the only things I look forward to and I will not let Arthur Morgan ruin this for me. So shut your mouth, and drink your go-go juice, alright angel?” Wade seethed out as he gestured towards Logan’s bottle of whiskey before he turned around, tucking a strand of invisible hair behind his ear before he sighed softly, reaching forward and opening the door.
That’s when you walk in.
Behind the door is you. You’re pretty, young, bright smile plastered on your face, cheeks beaming with happiness as you bounce on your heels, snacks and drinks practically spilling from your arms as you struggle to hold them. Logan doesn’t stop himself from craning his neck forward to get a look at you, watching as you stare up at Wade like he’s your favorite person in the entire world.
Both you and Wade squeal in a way that sounds way too similar, and if Logan wasn’t so fucking confused right now he’d most definitely comment on it.
“There she is! Come to Daddy my little buttercup!” Wade groans as he lifts you up into his arms. A noise that’s a cross between a groan and a giggle leaves your lips as he squishes you to his chest, your eyes fluttering shut as you let him squeeze you tight.
“Wade! You’re…crushing me..” you wheeze out, all while having a bright smile on your face.
“Crushing ensues when you don’t visit me for two weeks. I was planning on shimmying my tight little ass down the air ducts to land straight into your bedroom so we can finish these last two episodes” Wade hummed our matter of factly, casually keeping you pressed against his chest as he kicked the door shut and carried you into the house before setting you down.
Logan’s watching the entire thing play out from the couch, eyebrows raised as he watches someone finally match the man’s hyperactive energy levels.
“I had a cold! I didn’t want to get you sick” you giggle out softly as you turn to face him as you walk into the apartment, still completely oblivious to the other man sitting on the couch.
“Princess have you taken a look at this mug? Influenza sees me and it runs” he grins at you whilst pointing at his face, which only earns a gentle nudge to his side with your elbow.
You finally turn towards the man on the couch, a look of surprise on your face as you take in his face, his form. It doesn’t take very long for you to come to the realization that whoever it is that’s been sitting here this entire time, is one of the most attractive men you’ve ever seen.
You never thought in your entire life that you’d see the Wolverine in person.
“Oh! How rude of me…I didn’t know you were busy Wade” Your voice is soft as you apologize, eyes wide and worried that you’d interrupted something you had no business stepping into. Logan can already see the way your sneaker clad feet are turning to leave, giving both him and Wade an apologetic smile.
“Oh no you don’t. You aren’t using that sweet little understanding bit with me. If Wolvie wants to join in on our weekly Vanderpump Rules watch party, then he can. If he doesn’t, then the honey badger can kick rocks” Wade bends down a bit, giving you an assuring nod as he places his hand on the small of your back.
Logan rolls his eyes as he throws back the rest of his whiskey. “I’m way ahead of you asshole” Logan grumbles out, annoyed with many things already.
“Hold on there beautiful, don’t be rude. Everything that is good and pure in the world is standing in the middle of our apartment and you aren’t going to introduce yourself?” Wade scoffs out in disbelief, his words making you roll your eyes as you give him another nudge.
“Wade it’s fine, he doesn’t have to-“ you try, seeing just how little patience the man had from the few words he’d given you since you walked in.
“My name is Logan, I live here now” he nodded, his words short and brief.
You hate yourself because him acting this way is only making you want him more.
You inhale deeply before you give him a soft smile, the snacks you’d brought still clutched close to your chest, fingers pressing against the crinkly material of the various packages as you nod.
“It’s nice to meet you Logan. My names (y/n). I hope to see you around the building more often” you beam, your response a bit too bubbly and excited for someone who’d been hit with the driest, most bland introduction from a man probably ever.
Logan watches you closely for a bit, eyes taking in your bright expression, your excited eyes that are practically shining with stars in them. You’re young, and eager and Logan knows exactly what kind of girl you are just by the way you’re smiling at him. He’d run into a million different versions of you at bars and clubs, out on the streets when he was on missions, anywhere that he was able to be perceived, he ran into someone like you.
That in and of itself lets Logan know that he needs to stay far away from you.
He gives you a nod before pushes himself off of the couch, lazily grabbing the bottle of whiskey as he begins walking out of the living room towards his bedroom.
He can already hear your feet stepping forward on the wooden floor, so he braces himself for what he knows what’s coming next.
“You’re more than welcome to stay! I know it’s corny but the show is actually very entertaining” you giggle out softly as you offer yours and Wade’s tradition to Logan as well.
“I’m good sweetheart” he mumbles out without even turning around, raising his hand up as he gives you a back handed wave, rounding the corner to his bedroom. “Was nice meeting you” he makes out before slamming his door shut, the noise making you flinch.
You frown softly as you turn to face Wade. “Was it something I said?” You whisper out, worried you might have offended the man
Wade rolls his eyes at his roommates reaction, turning towards you as he extends his hand out, his palm going nearly rigid as he gives you a stiff pat to the head. “We can’t all be as excited about life as you are, angel. Life sucked the fun out of that one before you probably learned how to drive” he sighed out before he pulled you over to the couch.
“Now! If I don’t have Lisa Vanderpump meddling in the love lives of her alcoholic lounge employees in the next five seconds I am going to blow this entire complex up. Let’s get to it sugar plum” he nodded to himself as he forces you down into the couch, grabbing his remote and getting right down to the festivities of that fine Friday night.
You however, had a particularly harder time than usual paying attention to the shitty reality tv show that you and Wade bonded over, and there was only one person to blame.
Logan.
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Logan is shocked to be the only one awake the next morning.
His head is pounding from all the whiskey he drank, and he knew he’d be nursing quite the hangover from it all. What he didn’t know however, was that Wade would be slumped in his bed much longer from a night with you than he was.
He’s alone in the kitchen for maybe two hours when Wade finally emerges from his bedroom, a long drawn out groan following as he massages his temples, eyes screwed tight due to the bright sun spilling in.
“Jesus fucking Christ….can’t anyone afford some fucking curtains here? I feel like I’m staring into Satan’s asshole” He groans out, eyes finally opening to watch the mountain of a man standing over a bowl of cereal in the kitchen.
“Why hello there sunshine, did the whiskey bottle tug you out of bed early this morning? You’re almost never conscious while the sun is still up” Logan rolls his eyes at his roommates words, bringing the bowl to his lips and slurping up the rest of the milk before he put the empty bowl into the sink behind him, large hand going down to wrap around his coffee mug.
“Look who’s talkin’….you and your friend seemed to have just as much fun as I did” he sighs out, voice gravely and rough.
Wade smiles brightly as he nods, making his way into the kitchen as he lets out a happy sigh. “A (y/n) hangover would bring you to your knees grandpa….although I have the feeling you might not be too opposed to that with how your filthy eyes were eating her up….shes cute isn’t she? Single too. If Vanessa hadn’t swept me off my feet and stolen my heart I would have been ten toes deep into her by now” Wade rambles out as he searches the pantry for something to fill his stomach with.
Logan isn’t shocked to hear that you’re single, and in the best way possible of course. You were very very attractive, however the way that you looked at him let him know everything he needed to know about you.
“I don’t think I asked. She’s not my type” Logan sighs out softly before taking a sip of his coffee.
That wasn’t true at all, not entirely at least. Logan found you attractive from the moment he laid eyes on you. Only an idiot could look at you and try to convince themselves that you weren’t a beautiful girl. However, Logan knew what kind of girl you were. You were a young girl who probably had some sort of fantasy to fuck a ‘dilf’ (as Wade called them) and you’d bat your pretty lashes and pout your lips to get Logan to melt for you, but that was only the half of it. You only wanted to fuck him, to have someone experienced work on your body just to leave and venture out on your own once you were done with him.
Logan was old and miserable and hard to deal with, all things that he was very aware of. Being with him was not a fucking cake walk, and he knew that those twinkles in your eyes when you saw him were all driven by raging hormones that would dissipate once you realized how much of a piece of shit he was.
Logan was too old for this, and he was too old for you.
“Not your type? Of course she’s your type! She’s everyone’s type. That’s like saying Beyoncé isn’t your type and I will not allow you to disrespect the queen…the bee hive is fucking scaring” Wade practically whimpered out before he let out a groan.
“Is it the age gap? Because if it is, they sell pills for that sweetie. It’s a normal part of life that we all go through! There’s nothing to be ashamed of and I’m sure she would understand-“ Wade’s words are cut off by Logan lifting up his hand, the sharp sound of his claws shooting through his knuckles filling the air, making Wade yelp and flinch.
“Keep talking and I swear to god I will cut your dick off every single day so that you don’t even get the chance to use those pills” Logan practically growls out.
“Relax! Jesus Christ you are violent. I’m starting to rethink giving you my spare room asshole” Wade breaths out before he sighs, lifting his hands up in defense before he speaks again.
“Look…all I’m saying, is that a bit of a crush is starting to brew, and she’s a sweet girl! I know for a fact that baby making factory is filled with dust and fucking cobwebs, don’t you think it’s time to get those gears runnin’ again?” Wade rolls his arm like a train as he puts on his best southern accent, which only further annoys Logan.
“She doesn’t even know me. She’ll get over it” Logan nods confidently, ignoring every word that leaves Wade’s mouth as he finishes his coffee, putting it in the sink where he put his cereal bowl earlier.
Wade groans in annoyance. “I am being such a good wing man right now, hooking you up with her? Most people’s friends hook them up with Freddy fucking Krueger and they still end up getting married. I’m giving you a real life fairy from a fucking Barbie movie and you’re turning her down??” Wade practically pleads with the man as he watches him starting to leave the kitchen.
“Hook her up with someone else. I’ll be back later” Logan groans out, not at all wanting to continue this conversation with his roommate any longer.
“Yeah fuck you too grandpa. I hope you get hit by a fucking bus on your way out” Wade groans out as he shovels a spoonful of cereal into his mouth, the man clearly taking offense to Logan not wanting to get to know you better.
“We’ll see if she lets you off this easy…” Wade mumbled under his breath, a soft smirk on his face.
Wade knew you better than anyone, and he knew that you were a whole different ball field of sweetness that Logan was most definitely not ready to handle.
And sweet you were.
By the end of the week, Logan was honestly starting to forget about you and the small cyclone you’d set off in his head ever since he’d seen you that night. He was busy with things around the neighborhood and trying his best to get used to the new world that he was living in. His plate was full and he had no time to think about the silly girl that lived next door to him.
However you didn’t let him forget for much longer.
Because come Friday night, your knuckle is rapping against the door like clock work, interrupting Logan’s alone time in the same way you had the week prior. It’s a silent gesture that it is his cue to leave and give you and Wade the living room for the night.
Logan just about catches a glimpse of you when Wade opens the door, and he notices very quickly how different you look from last time.
Last time, you’d opted for a pretty casual look. Wade had mentioned that you worked at a bar in the city, so he could only assume you came straight from there. Your denim shorts were cute, fit your ass well and he was sure you got many tips from those alone, and your purple halter top went well with your skin tone, but it was nothing fancy or out of the ordinary, just simply a girl in some clothes.
Now? Now you were putting in some effort.
The linen white dress you wore fit you snug at your middle, pushing out your tits a bit, hugging you in all the right places before falling down and flowing out right above your knees. You even went as far as to wear a bit of makeup, your eyelids sparkling a bit, lips glossy.
You’d put in all that effort, just for him.
“Jesus Christ…” Logan mumbled under his breath in disbelief, hating that you’d gone this far for him.
“Are you kidding me! I get your sweaty work clothes and he gets this?? You know he takes the animal thing seriously right? Pees to mark his territory and everything. I am much more pleasant, I promise” Wade complains as he leads you into the apartment, eyes falling down to the small container of cookies in your arms.
“Are these….fuck off. I have been begging you for weeks, and suddenly Jacob from twilight moves in and you’re making them??” Wade gasps out, face slowly turning up to look over at Logan as you giggle softly.
“I made them when you first moved in so I wanted to do the same for Logan…I hope you have a sweet tooth?” You questioned carefully, giving Logan a shy smile as you outstretch your arms to hand the cookies to him.
Wade is watching Logan like he’s your fucking guard dog, ready to pounce on the man the second he even tries to say something mean to an angelic soul like you.
It makes Logan sigh softly, eyes drifting down to the cookies before looking back up at you. “My doctor said I’m not allowed” he lies before bringing his glass of whiskey to his lips, acting as the biggest contradiction as he finishes the remnants of it before he picks up the bottle and turns around to leave.
“Don’t make any noise. I’m going to bed” he mumbles out once more before he slams his bedroom door much like he did the first time you arrived.
Wade groaned as he brought his hands up to pinch the bridge of his nose, quickly reaching out and placing a hand on your soft, exposed shoulder.
“Thank god. I was getting worried I wouldn’t have all of these to myself. Come on, Tom Sandoval doesn’t wait for anybody” he nods his head towards the tv, urging you to sit with him and distract you from how utterly stupid that lie was that Logan spit at you without a second thought.
Wade sighs as he notices the soft pout on your face, your fingers nervously toying with the ends of your dress as you struggle to relax, your head probably overflowing with every reason why Logan would hate you. He reaches out, tugging you closer to rest your head against his shoulder.
“Hey, he’s just a tough one to crack. He’ll come around soon peanut, I promise” he assured you before he shoved his hand into the bowl of cookies, pressing one to your lips.
“Now, say ahh. You deserve to eat one after all the hard work you did, little Betty Crocker” he teases you, making you giggle softly as you shoo his hand away before taking the cookie to eat yourself, finally relaxing into the couch as you let out a gentle sigh.
Logan really hoped that it would stop there, but it doesn’t.
He knows you aren’t stupid, everyone on the entire planet knows that the Wolverine doesn’t go to the fucking doctor. He could drink battery acid if he wanted to and he’d be fine, so him using the excuse of his doctor telling him he couldn’t eat sugar to not eat your food was a crock of shit, but he did it for two reasons.
One, because he didn’t want to have to accept anything from you, it would only had fuel to a fire that Logan knew he couldn’t put out once burnt too brightly. Two, was to kill any glamorizations you had for being with someone of his age. He was an old man, despite being a fucking killing machine, he was an old man. All he wanted to do was drink, smoke, fight a bit when the time called for it, and sleep, and he really could not fit a little girlfriend into that schedule, nor could he rob you of what you wanted and deserved with someone your own age instead of him.
Logan was starting to come to the conclusion that you probably weren’t as smart as he thought you were.
Because unfortunately, you don’t stop there.
For about an entire month, the weeks are filled with you constantly knocking on the door. It slowly goes from you bringing treats on your Friday nights with Logan, to you popping up on various days thought out the week instead.
Logan quickly learns that your love language is food, and you show that by constantly trying to feed him.
First it was the cookies, then you were knocking on his door way too early in the morning, beaming with a bright smile as you shoved a container of breakfast sandwiches into his naked chest.
“These are for you! I made enough for both you and Wade” you smile brightly, plump bottom lip tugged beneath your teeth as you give him a wave before he can deny the food or give it back.
After that, you were dropping off lunch for him. He wasn’t entirely sure how you were doing it, but you managed to always knock whenever Wade wasn’t around, most likely because the two of you were so close you had Wade’s schedule practically memorized, which meant that you were forcing Logan to interact with you whether he liked it or not.
“I’m off to work and I made too much! I hope you like spaghetti” you giggle softly before giving him another one of your signature waves, skipping off down the hallway to leave for work, once again leaving Logan dumbfounded as he stares down at the Tupperware of warm food in his hands.
It was getting to the point where you were practically keeping both him and Wade fed almost completely, rarely failing to share the food you’d made for yourself with them, and always sprinkling in some of your freshly baked pastries and desserts throughout all of that.
The worst part about it? Logan isn’t sure he’s ever had anything so tasty in his entire life.
You seriously knew what the hell you were doing behind a stove or at the oven, and it almost pissed Logan off to admit how much he appreciated the literal meal plan you’d set up for him.
As much as he likes it though, Logan could see exactly what accepting all of this was doing.
He saw it in the way that you’d linger longer and longer every time you dropped something off. What was once a shy little smile and a quick goodbye had now turned into you going into lengthy rants about work or the latest recipe you were stuck on, which Logan found himself always sticking around and listening to despite the fact that he rarely spoke.
That alone made your eyes twinkle, and he could hear how quickly it made your heart beat every time he leaned against the opposite side of the door from you, a soft sigh leaving his lips as he prepared himself for the words that would come out of your mouth on that day.
Logan gave an inch, and you took a mile, and that was the problem. Any attention he gave, he knew you’d take to the extreme, looking far too deep into the details of him being slightly less of an asshole that he usually was.
And on a night where Logan was laying in his bed, his mind replaying the countless times you’d stood at his door to give him food, using it all as an excuse to talk to him for a few minutes and get his attention on you, he knew it was time to cut you down from the root, and stop any dreams you had of the two of them ever amounting to anything more than next door neighbors.
He knew you’d be back eventually, it was only a matter of time until you were back with your latest meal for him. He found himself reciting what he’d say to you over and over again, cementing it into his brain as he pressed his palms against the island top one morning, eyes staring off into space as he mindlessly grabbed his coffee and took a sip.
knock knock knock!
The sound is familiar and it practically haunts Logan in his fucking dreams, the soft sound of your fists rapping against the door. He sighs softly because he knows you’re behind it, big bright smile on your face as you hold god knows what in your hands to gift to him.
“Morning Logan!” You beam, bright eyed and bushy tailed as you give him a small wave before you look down at the container before stretching your arms out to hand to him.
“You seemed interested last time I mentioned that breakfast quesadilla recipe I was working on…and I think I got it!” You’re so excited, and Logan lets out a soft sigh as he eyes you carefully before he pushes his hand gently against the container so that it’s back against your chest.
“I…look kid….I don’t…” his words trail off, feeling bad as you simply stare up at him with those big eyes and that happy smile, looking at him as if he’s the only person you want to see right now, waiting for him to say whatever it is he can’t do.
“You’ve gotta stop this” he tries to reason with you, his forearm pressed against the top of the door as he stares down at you.
You furrow your eyebrows as you watch him, shaking your head a bit as your voice goes low. “I….what?” Your voice trembles a bit, because you know what’s happening, you’ve been here before. You’ve gotten yourself into this same fucked up mess of liking someone so much that you couldn’t even see that they didn’t like you back, going on a power trip of showering them with so much affection that you didn’t even realize they’d been trying to stop you from the very beginning.
It was happening again.
Logan knows that he can’t let you down easy. You’re too sweet, too understanding, and he knows that if he isn’t blunt with you, giving you the harsh truth, that you’ll just feed into the nice things that he says rather than looking at the bigger picture.
So he sighs, looking over your head for a moment before he finally looks back down at you.
“You’re just…you’re not my kind of girl, alright? Someone like you, could never be with someone like me and that just is the way it is….so quit it with the food deliveries, alright?” He’s stern, speaking to you like a child who refuses to listen, voice growing louder and rougher as he towers over you.
“There’s nothing you can make for me or do for me that will make me want you” He adds salt to the wound with that one, wanting his words to get through to you loud and clear
Logan knows it’s already coming, those big eyes filling with tears that make your eyes shimmer like swimming pools, mouth opening and closing as you struggle to find the words to respond with before you give a slight nod, quickly looking away once the tears spill out into your cheeks, your hands coming up to wipe them away roughly.
“I…fuck…I’m sorry..” is all you say before you quickly rush away from the door, mortified as you open your own apartment door and slam it behind you, the sound making Logan groan softly before he closes his own door.
Of course you apologized. Here he was, crushing your dreams for his own sake and you fucking apologized. It only further cemented how wrong you and him were if he were to ever give you a chance, you were too good, too nice, and Logan could only hope that you found someone else who could give you what you wanted and what you deserved.
As for him? He wanted to focus on the relief he’d soon feel settle in now that he didn’t have to face you every other day anymore. He could only hope that you little stunts would come to a halt after all of this.
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Logan doesn’t really have to hope for you to not come around, because he doesn’t see you for a long time after that.
At first he assumed it would just be a day or two until you were back for Wade, the two of you never going long without at least chatting in the hallway for a quick recap of your day or your week, however it’s the end of the week and neither Logan nor Wade have heard from you at all.
There are no knocks at the door, no more pastries or yummy meals with your name written all over them, it’s almost as if you don’t even live in the same complex anymore.
And when that Friday rolls around and you never show up either? Logan knows he’s fucked up.
Logan is thankful that Wade isn’t too freaked out over you being absent that week, seeing as he’d explain that this wasn’t entirely out of the ordinary for you. Although Logan knew what it was that pushed you away from the apartment, he was more than willing to let Wade believe work had drained you a bit more than usual that week, pulling you away from him.
By the third week though? Wade is pissed.
It’s Friday night, and he’s pacing the living room in front of Logan, his arms crossed as he shakes his head.
“I don’t get it! She’s only ever gone two weeks without coming by and that’s because she had a cold, and she told me! I haven’t heard from her in so long, I feel like I’m a fucking military wife waiting for her husband to write her back!” Wade whined out, desperate for an answer behind your disappearance.
Logan couldn’t even look at Wade, guilt eating away at him as his fingers wrapped around the ice beer bottle in his hand, simply letting the man walk around searching for answers when the reason behind his friends absence was sitting right in front of him.
“Fuck this. If she wants to stop being my friend she’s going to have to man the fuck up and tell me herself. Im going over there myself” he huffs out in annoyance, moving towards the front door.
Logan is on his feet before Wade can make it any further, stepping between him and the door as he shakes his head.
He knew that what happened needed to come from him, not you.
“Slow down…I…I know why she’s not coming around anymore” Logan makes out slowly, his words makes Wade raise his eyebrows.
“Anymore? What the fuck did you do, kill her or something??” Wade’s eyes are wide, and it makes Logan roll his eyes at the dramatics before he shoves him over towards the couch.
“Go sit down” he orders before he follows behind, singing softly as he sits next to Wade, avoiding his eyes as he speaks.
“She was coming around a lot and I…I didn’t want her getting the wrong idea so…I just…I told her she needed to stop” Logan shrugged nonchalantly as he gave a horrible retelling of what happened between the two of you.
Wade on the other hand, knew you very well, and he knew that you were probably the most understanding person on the entire fucking planet, so Logan had to probably say some fucked up shit to make you avoid them like the fucking plague, so bad that he probably made you-
“You fucking idiot. You made her cry, didn’t you” Wade visibly gets angry when he comes to this conclusion, making Logan snap his head in his direction quickly because how the fuck did he come to that conclusion so quickly?
“I…so you did talk to her?” Logan questions carefully, his words making Wade groan loudly as he stands up, pressing his face in his hands.
“You are….oh my god you are probably the dumbest person I have ever fucking met. Charles Xavier would be very ashamed of this behavior Logan!” Wade practically sobbed before he shook his head once again.
“You do realize she’s just a girl, right? She’s not some villainous asshole trying to do experiments on you or something. A simple ‘I’m not interested’ would have sufficed” Wade groans out in annoyance before he walks back towards the door.
“I am going to try and save one of the only friendships I have, and leave you here to think about how you are going to save ours, because after this stunt I am not sure I will ever let you touch me again” he huffs out softly before whipping his head away from him in disgust before he swings the door open, slams it shut and leaves to your apartment, leaving Logan there by himself.
Wade’s words echo in his head, making him realize that you really are just a girl, a girl who had an innocent crush that he brutally stepped on and smashed into a thousand little pieces when he could have easily told you he wasn’t interested in you.
Logan hated it, but he felt guilty.
He’s happy to hear that you and Wade were able to mend things together, the two of you opting to spend weekends in your home rather than his from now on, leaving Logan to the peace and quiet that he’d always wanted.
Although, it isn’t what he wanted, it isn’t what he wanted at all because he finds that he’s missing something. He’s missing the smell of your cookies or cinnamon rolls or whatever the fuck it is that you bring over, he’s missing the sound of yours and Wade’s laugh across the way as he tries to sleep, and he especially misses the little front door chats you and him would share whenever you stopped by for him.
Because over the course of the time that he’d lived there, he’d see you at least once every week, your bright smile filling his days and making him feel warm inside.
But now the last memory he had of you was you crying in front of him before running away.
Logan tries to drown out those annoying thoughts as he usually does, with alcohol. He comes home drunk on a Saturday night, stumbling in through the front door as he tugs off his leather jacket, kicks off his boots and stumbles into his bedroom to fall face first into his bed.
He’s able to forget about you for a bit, annoyed that your pretty face had been plaguing him for days on end. Right now he just wants to sleep and enjoy the warm floaty feeling that comes with a good cup of-
“Oh my god” Logan makes out the faint sound of your voice through the thin walls of the apartment.
He realized the first night he’d moved in that his bedroom was adjacent to yours when he was going to sleep and he could hear you shuffling about your bedroom.
Every night he’d hear little things, sometimes he’d hear the small sound of your music while you got ready, or he’d hear you giggling softly to someone as you spoke to them on the phone, he’d even heard a loud thud followed by an annoyed groan from you, which he could only assume was you stubbing your toe or running into something.
Logan had heard you a lot, and while most times he was too drunk or tired to ignore it, the sounds he was hearing now were….they were foreign for you. He’d never heard your voice pitched that way, high and whiny…he wondered if you were okay, were you crying?
“Fuck…fuck!”
There it was again.
It had Logan frowning as he turned onto his back, staring up at the ceiling as he squinted a bit, straining to hear more of what was going on.
“That’s it baby…so good for me…” another voice groaned out, muffled and lower, too deep to have been your own. That, paired with a slow rhythmic thumping, and Logan wasn’t confused anymore.
You were getting fucked.
Logan tried very hard not to think about you this way, splayed out on a bed in front of him, eyes red and glossy as you beg for him to give you more, needy for any sort of attention that he'd give you. He knew that you were something he couldn't feed into...
Because he knew he'd like it too much.
Yet here you were, moaning so pretty for another fucking man with a bit of dry wall separating the two of you, and it was making Logan's head spin.
His chest swelled with different emotions, anger, annoyance, jealousy, envy.....
Lust
You sounded so fucking pretty, and as much as he hated that it was someone else making you feel that way, subjecting him to a fucking audio porno, he couldn't deny the tent that was growing in his jeans.
Logan groaned softly as he propped himself up, eyes low as he stared down at his throbbing cock through his jeans, begging to be touched, begging to take the place of the idiot that was in your bed making you moan like that.
Another loud moan rumbled through the walls, making Logan's eyes flutter shut and roll to the back of his head as he took in your noises.
He wondered how you'd sound for him, what you would say, if you would beg for him. God, you probably sounded so fucking good when you begged, so pretty, so fucking sweet for him. You were so eager for him, so eager to please, there was no doubt in Logan's mind that you would be the perfect girl for him.
You were practically begging him for it the weeks prior.
His hand made its way to his jeans, undoing his belt and popping them open before tugging his cock out, hissing softly as he laid back, head resting against the pillow as his fist wrapped around his length, slowly working on his sensitive skin as he let his mind travel to more thoughts of you as your moans sang him the symphony that matched perfectly with it.
His fist moved up and down over his length, spreading his precum as he thought about what you'd taste like, how you'd feel pressed against his tongue while he did just this. He imagined you'd taste perfect, the best pussy he's ever had if you'd ever let him.
Another string of moans makes its way into his bedroom, and it has him bucking his hands up into his fists, growing closer as he chases his orgasm to the sound of your voice.
Logan felt like a fucking pervert, stroking his cock while you were getting fucked by someone else right next door. That could have easily been him had he not fucked things up with you royally, he thought.
"Im gonna cum..." you mewl out, Logan can practically hear the pathetic little pout on your lips as you announce it, and he can't stop himself from groaning out softly as he bites back a moan in fears that you'll hear him too.
"Me too baby..." He growls out between gritted teeth.
He's fucking his hand at this point, the sounds of your moans and visions of you under him driving him closer to where he needed to go, he finally cums when he hears you moan loudly, knowing that was it. Thick ribbons of his pearly cum fly out of him, making the man sigh softly as he slowly rides out his orgasm with a few strong strokes from his hand.
Logan is old and gross and truly can't be bothered with the clean up, so he opts to grab a nearby t shirt and clean himself off before he tugs his jeans off, tosses them into the corner with the rest of his clothes and turns onto his side, pulling his pillow over his ears in fears of you and that jackass going another round while he sleeps.
He wants to sleep before embarrassment can take over, because he knows what he's done is beneath pathetic. He would much rather deal with it all in the morning.
Because despite how embarrassed he feels, he needs to orchestrate some sort of plan to speak to you.
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Logan knew that getting you to talk to him was not going to be an easy feat. You ran from him any time you two ended up in the hallway together, and you made it a point to never be in the same place with him for two long.
So he had to be smart with this, and he needed a full proof way to get you to speak for him for more than a few seconds.
He figured trying to convince you as himself was a lost cause, there was no way you would even give him the time of day to ask for a bottle of water let alone talk to you about his feelings.
However, you would most definitely listen to him if he were Wade.
Now, Wade most definitely would not do this for Logan. There was no way in hell Wade would risk your feelings for that, he was way too protective over you for that. He was weary of Logan when it came to you now, and rarely brought you up unless Logan asked....
Which he did quite a bit now.
He was able to snag Wade's phone while he was taking a shower, getting ready for one of his little dates with Vanessa (they were going to meet up at a bar and then fuck the entire weekend).
Logan had limited time, because Wade was already on Rewrite the Stars off The Greatest Showman soundtrack, so he had to work fast.
He stood outside of the bathroom with the door cracked to swiftly put the phone back when he was done, the man groaning in annoyance as he clicked through Wade's endless screens of stupid games with clickbait-y ads that are designed to lure children in to find his messages.
When he finally finds them, he's quick to click the icon with a picture of you and Wade and the contact name angel baby.
Logan knew he had to put on his best Wade impression for this, so he inhales deeply before his fingers slowly tap across the screen.
me: Hey baby cakes! Wolvie's gone for the night, vanderpump at mine? Like old times?
angel baby: Hi! You sure? I don't mind doing it here!
me: I have wayyyy better drinks here. See you soon!
angel baby: fineee I'll be there after work
Logan lets out a breath he was holding for what felt like forever before he quickly slips Wade's phone back into the bathroom on the sink counter, closing the door slowly before rushing out of there to make himself seem as casual as possible.
Wade is out about twenty minutes later, a clear pep in his step. It makes Logan chuckle softly, bringing his beer to his lips as he nods towards his roommate. "Hot date tonight huh?" Logan hums out.
Wade hums softly as he nods, biting his bottom lip as he gives Logan an excited smile. "You bet I do. I am getting laid tonight buddy, I refuse to be the roommates that everyone thinks fuck...unless" his words trail off as he gives Logan a look, wiggling his eyebrows (or lack there of) as he opens his hands and gives him a little spin, shaking his ass at the end.
Logan chuckles as he puts a hand up. "Im good" He refuses before taking another sip of his beer, watching as Wade reaches down to grab a shot glass and a bottle of tequila, pouring some out for himself as he throws it back. "Liquid courage how I love you...its your loss man. I'll go give myself to a woman who actually knows how to fuck" He nods to himself before pouring out another shot, throwing it back and giving Logan a wave as he makes his way to the front door.
"See ya Monday Wolvie!" He chirps out as he leaves with a peace sign, his antics making Logan chuckle softly as his eyes drift over to the bottle off tequila.
He could use some of that with having to face you.
Logan sighs as he gets up, pouring himself a shot and throwing it back before he pours one more and throws that back before he tosses the bottle back into its reserved cupboard, moving to the couch to wait for your inevitable arrival.
knock knock knock!
It comes almost an hour later, the sound making Logans heart seize up, recognizing the familiar knock as if it were his own fucking heartbeat. He inhales deeply, stopping by a nearby mirror and checking himself out before he exhales deeply, moving to open the door.
"I'm a little late! I had to stop at the store to get the proper necessities-" Your words are cut off when you finally look up to see Logan instead of Wade, your face dropping as your mouth hangs open for a moment.
Logan want's to die just from that look in your eyes because you look fucking terrified, you even go as far as taking a step back as you give a nervous laugh.
"Oh...sorry Logan..is umm...is Wade around? He told me to come over..." You quickly explain, quickly fearing that the man will have more mean words for you for knocking on his door again.
It breaks Logan's heart because you don't have that twinkle in your eye anymore, nor do you have that excited smile on your pretty face when you see him and it makes him feel sick to his stomach.
"No he actually just left, you just missed him" He explains with a shrug and a soft apologetic smile.
You clear your throat awkwardly as you nod slowly. "Uhh...No worries! He probably had something to do....could you maybe tell him I was here when you see him? Sorry for bothering you" You mumble out before giving him a tightlipped smile and an awkward wave before you sigh, turning to leave at that.
Bothering him? God, he had really fucked up, hadn't he?
"Wait!" Logan calls out, stepping out into the hallway to catch you before you've made it into your own apartment.
You turn to face him, raising your eyebrows at the man. He groans softly as he stares at you for a moment before he looks back into the apartment, inhaling deeply as he remembered Wade's words
She's just a girl.
"I don't uh...know much about that Vanderpump thing but...I'm not busy, if you wanted someone to watch with tonight?" He sighs out sheepishly, giving you a small smile.
You stare at him for a moment, a soft frown on your lips as you clutch your snacks closer to your chest, using them as somewhat of a shield for your poor heart. You couldn't trust Logan, and you weren't sure if your heart could take anymore of the mean things that he said to you.
"You don't have to pity me or anything....I'm not a child, Logan" You explain to him, voice small and quiet as your frown deepens, your hand coming down to grip your door knob as you let out another sigh.
"Have a goodnight..." You try your best to end it, and it makes Logan groan softly as he quickly rushes towards you, putting his large hand over yours on the doorknob, stopping you from opening it further.
The sudden closeness makes your eyes widen, staring up at the man as his large hand squeezes over yours, the feeling making your heart flutter with excitement.
“I….please….let me makeup for being such a dick the last time we spoke…you deserve it” he nodded, eyes staring deeply into yours as he gives your hand one more squeeze.
You swallow nervously as you stare up at him, hating how warm you feel with him being so close, especially after he was so fucking mean to you all those weeks ago.
You sigh softly before your hand slowly falls from your doorknob, giving Logan a small nod.
“Yeah….okay” you agree with him before you look over to the opened door of his apartment, giving the man a small smile.
“Lead the way Wolvie” you tease him gently, the sound of your playful voice making Logan chuckle softly with you as he sighs in relief, leading you back to his apartment.
Logan can kiss his lucky stars over the fact that you actually agreed to coming back to the apartment with him. Wade was right when he said you’re the must understanding person on the planet.
He finds it hard to focus on the show when you’re this close to him, head resting against the back of the couch as you babysit a bag of sour patch, giggling softly whenever one of the insufferable Los Angeles characters complain about their boyfriend of their girlfriend cheating on them with someone else in their friend group.
It’s hard to focus when you’re this close to him, because he’s never been with you this way before.
You had been on Logan’s mind almost 24/7 since he first met you, and now that he had you with him alone, he didn’t know how to talk to you or how to interact with you. He felt nervous that he would open his mouth and say something stupid.
To sum it up, he was almost 200 years old yet a 20 something year old girl knew how to communicate her feelings better than he did.
You hum softly as you finally look up at him, pouting softly at how stiff the man looked in your presence. "You alright Logan? We can watch something else if you want" You hum out softly as you move to sit criss crossed on the couch, turning your body to face his.
Logan shakes his head as he reaches for the remote, knowing that he would not be able to focus with the sound of three Californian girls fighting over a man named Todd. "Let's talk for a bit....I wanna get to know you more" Logan sighed out softly as he turned to face you a bit more as well, watching as your face beams with excitement over his interest in you.
"Im an open book....what do you wanna know?" You open up as you take a sip of your beer, giving Logan a soft smile.
That was all it really took for you and Logan to actually hit it off, the mans anxiety melting away at the thought of talking to you once he realized how easy going you were. He was able to learn so much about you within the hours that you and him spoke, and before he knew it, it was almost 2 in the morning and you two had been talking since around 9.
"College sucks...Im literally either there or at the bar....its why I find nights with Wade so important" You sighed softly as you explained, your face falling as you pouted a bit.
Logan smiled fondly at you, the many easily seeing how you wore your feelings on your face, you were so expressive, so clear with how you were feeling and open with your emotions.
You truly were an open book.
Logan licked his lips as he brought his beer to his lips, taking a sip as he watched you carefully. Something burned inside of him. something that desperately wanted to grill you about what it was he heard that night through the wall, who it was you were with, if you were still seeing him or not.
"Yeah? Any time for dating then?" He hums out, pink tongue darting out of his mouth to lick his lips as he settles back into the couch. One of his legs were trapped along the couch, caging you in as the other rested on the floor, knee bent as his hand rested on it, legs spread right in front of you.
His question catches you off guard, eyes widening a bit as you try to register if he's asked the question that you think he asked, and if he is, does he mean it in a friendly way?
He has to, right? A man doesn't tell you that he doesn't want you just to grill you about your love life.
You inhale deeply as you try to find the right words to say, wondering how deep you should get into the current state of your love life.
You give Logan a shrug as you take a sip of your beer. "I try....my love life is in shambles though....I truly can't remember the last time I had a decent date" You frown, your words honest as you scrunch your nose in disgust as you think back to the horrible men you've dated.
Logan raises his eyebrows in disbelief at your words before he nods slowly, taking a sip of his drink before he sighs. "Mm...the things I heard through the walls would beg to differ Princess" Logan shoots back without a second thought.
Your eyes widen as you think back to a few nights ago, throwing your head back as you find yourself cringing in embarrassment over the fact that Logan had fucking heard you.
"You heard that? Logan oh my god that is....that is so disgusting on my end I am so sorry, I promise it won't happen again" You ramble, making a mental note to never fuck in your bedroom again as long as Logan was living across from you.
You were going to be having shower sex only.
Logan chuckles softly as he shakes his head, holding his hands up in defense before he speaks. "Oh no need, you sounded like you were having quite the time....don't stop on my account" He smirks at you.
Knowing that you had not the slightest inkling that he was stroking his cock to the very sound of you getting fucked.
You groan softly as you take a healthy swig of your drink, Logan watching closely before he hums out once more.
"New boyfriend?" he questions again, eyes growing darker as he uses the conversation as a gateway into more important things.
You scoff softly as you shake your head. "God no....he's just a guy from my psych class....we met at a party and he took me home and...im sure I can spare you the gory details" You giggle softly before you sigh, moving to rest your head against the back of the couch as you watch the man across from you.
Logan nods slowly, bottom lip tugged beneath his teeth as he listens to you before he speaks.
"Just a guy hum....interesting" Logan nods slowly as he tosses back the rest of his beer before he sets the empty bottle down on the coffee table in front of the both of you, strong hands resting along his denim clad thighs, eyes never leaving yours.
"Forgot about me already baby?" he drawls out, voice low and gruff, dripping with lust as he watches you closely for your reaction.
His tone and words make you perk up, breath hitching in your throat as you face the man completely. His words shoot straight down to your core, making you swallow back a whine as you stare at him with a dumfounded expression.
"I....Logan..." You sigh out softly, your hands resting on your knees and balling into fists as you physically try to stop yourself from doing something you knew you couldn't do.
Logan chuckles softly as he shrugs. "It's true....you forgot all about me princess....it's okay though, I deserve it don't I?" he questions, watching as you silently watch him from across the couch.
When you don't answer, he's quick to pull it out of you. "Answer me baby" His demand makes you flinch softly and you quickly nod before you respond.
"Yeah...you did deserve it..." You agree with him.
Logan nods with you, a soft hum leaving his lips as he watches you. "I did...was so mean to you and you were just being the sweetest thing to me..." He hums softly, watching as you slowly grow softer for him with every word he spoke.
"It's alright baby....did he at least make you cum? I heard you, you know....when you said you were there? sounded so pretty...." He groans softly, a prominent tent forming in his jeans at the mere thought of your moans.
He's shocked when he hears a tiny one leave your lips, your eyes shooting down to his growing cock. It makes him smirk softly, pride filling his chest as he moves his hand down to palm himself before he nods at you.
"Eyes up here baby...thats it..." He nods slowly when he finally has his eyes back on yours.
"Now...answer my question" He urges you once more, his voice deliciously low and gravely, the sound making you squirm in your spot on the couch.
You inhale deeply before you shake your head. "I faked it..." You mumble under your breath, fighting the embarrassment that threatened to creep up your spine.
Logan felt like he had died and gone to heaven.
Because not only were you here with him, but that idiot that got the chance to be with you couldn't even make you cum properly...which only left more room for him to come in and do the job properly.
"You poor thing....I was afraid of that..." He groaned softly before he pat his hand along his lap, calling you over to him.
"C'mere peach...let daddy show you how a real man is supposed to make you feel..." He hummed out softly.
It was all you needed to come crawling over to him like a bitch in heat.
You moaned softly once you were settled down in his lap, either one of your plush thighs straddling his lap, arms wrapping around his neck as you stared down at him with needy eyes, bottom lip tugged between your teeth.
Logan groaned softly, strong hands coming down to grip your waist, tugging you closer as he leaned in, pressing his nose against your collar bone and growling at how fucking good you smelled.
"Atta girl....go on then baby, give daddy a kiss..." He ordered once more.
You wasted no time in pressing your lips to his, moaning softly into his mouth as you tugged at the hair at the nape of his neck.
You're so...fucking sweet, and sugary, and the dulcet sounds of your moans drives Logan absolutely insane, the older man gripping your waist tightly as he pushes his tongue into your mouth, tainting you for anyone who ever dares to kiss you after he has.
Logan groans into the kiss when he feels you rocking your hips back and forth, grinding your pussy against his bulge.
"Needy huh? Want daddy to help you baby? Yeah?" He groans out, your forehead resting against his as you nod, breathing heavily as you continue grinding down onto his bulge.
Logan chuckles softly as he nods, his hand going around your middle before he flips you around, tugging you down so that your back is pressed against his chest, his chin resting on your shoulder as he hums softly.
His hands trail down your body slowly, the little top you have on has a tie at the front, one that if Logan so much as flicks, will come undone. It makes him smirk softly as he takes one of the strings between his thumb and pointer finger, tugging at it slowly until your boobs bounce free, making him hiss softly.
"Fuck, look at that....such a pretty girl...." His hands look so rough along your soft skin, calloused fingers running along either one of your tits, cupping and massaging them delicately before he brings your nipples into his finger, twisting them slightly before he goes back to cupping them all over again.
You're so sensitive, so responsive to his touch. Your hand goes up to cup your hand over his thats working on your boobs, your hips bucking up into nothing as your other hand goes up and around Logan to hold onto his head.
"Logan...please..." You moan softly, your words making Logan smirk softly as he nods, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
"Im here baby....just enjoying all of you first" He explains before his hands go down your body.
Soon enough, he's unbuttoning your denim jeans, one of his hands coming up to raise your hips as he tugs them off your legs with your panties in one swift move before tossing them somewhere else in the living room.
Logan lets out a low gasp when his neck cranes down against your shoulder to look down at the mess between your legs, his strong hands creeping down to where you need him the most, your own hands pressing against his thigh.
"Fuck princess....so wet already....all this for me?" He hums out softly.
Either of his hands go down between your legs, pressing right against either one of your lips as he massages you softly, the feeling making your eyes roll back as your head falls against Logan's shoulder.
He smirks softly, his head coming down to attach his lips to your neck as one of his hands comes up to hold your hips down, pressing you flush against his body whilst the other starts rubbing your clit slowly.
"Such a good girl...letting daddy apologize for being so mean...thats it baby...fuck...thats it...." He urges you on further as his skilled fingers slowly works on your clit, your moans like music to his ears as he gives you exactly what you needed.
"Daddy...im....fuck....don't stop" You whine softly, gripping his wrist as he continues playing with your pussy, the feeling making your eyes roll. You're damn near drooling and all the man is doing is rubbing your clit for you.
It makes Logan chuckle softly, his fingers speeding up as his lips unlatch from your neck so he's able to look down at you, not wanting to miss the fucked out state of bliss written all over your face that's coming to you all because of him.
"Come on baby....cum all over your daddy's fingers, give it to me princess" He growls, picking up the pace as he begins grinding his hard on into your ass from behind, matching the way your hips roll to chase the rhythm of his fingers.
You're squirming so much at this point, a moaning mess as Logan holds you down by your hip, forcing you to take what he gives you, not giving you the chance to run away from the pleasure he so desperately wants to give to you.
"Oh my god! Im gonna fu-ahhh!" You moan loudly, back arching off of Logans chest as you cum hard all over his fingers.
Logan moans with you, watching in awe as you become a puddle of nothing but moans and gasps as you come down from your high, his fingers working slowly on your swollen pussy as your arousal drools out onto his fingers, forcing them to slip around and lose their place as he works on you.
"That's a good girl...thats daddy's good fucking girl....thats it....im right here baby...daddys gotchu" He praises you, soft whines and moans leaving your lips as his rough hands move from your pussy to instead run along your body, holding you, massaging you, making it known that he was indeed there with you.
It takes a few minutes for you to catch your breath properly, when you do, you finally feel Logans very large bulge pressing into your ass.
He's too busy pressing kisses along your throat and jaw, working his way up to your cheek and the corner of your lips to make sure you were there with him and comfortable.
"Logan..." You mumble softly before you roll your hips down against his cock, your eyes locking with his as you stare up at him with a needy glint in yours.
Logan raises his eyebrows at your actions, holding onto your hips as he guides you to grind down onto his lap.
"You want daddy's cock baby? Is that it?" He questions, his words alone making you moan softly as you nod, your hand coming up and tugging his head down to press against your lips.
"Please fuck me daddy..." You moan against him, pushing your tongue into his mouth as you swallow his groans.
He nods against you, silently reaching between the two of you to undo the button to his jeans and pulling his cock out, tongue playing with yours as he sits you both up a bit before he grabs both of your thighs, lifting you up and making you gasp softly.
"Don't worry princess...Daddy's got you..." he assures you before he slowly sinks you down onto his cock.
Both of you moan softly in unison, his length filling you up completely, making your eye roll back as as he settles you down onto his lap.
"Logan...L-Lo...you're so big...fuck" You gasp out, struggling to even form words properly as Logan's arms wraps around your waist, holding you close against his chest as he slowly starts to fuck up into you.
"You can take it baby...fuck...such a tight little pussy...so fuckin' good for me...takin' me so well angel" Logan growled against you, lips pressed against your back as he found a steady rhythm in fucking you.
You're a moaning mess. Logan is so big, and he fills you up so well, better than anyone ever has, and it makes you feel like you'll fucking cry because of how good it feels.
Logan growls every time your pussy tightens around him, wrapping him up and keeping him so warm. He’s forgotten how fucking good it feels to be this close to someone, hearing such pretty moans….
Logan thinks he could get used to this….
Logan thinks he could get used to you.
“Come on baby….give it to me…cum all over my fuckin cock” He urges you, wanting nothing more than to feel your pretty pussy spasm on his length.
You gasp softly, struggling to hold your head up as he defiles you from down below, making a mess of your pussy as he pounds into you like a wild fucking animal, the feeling foreign to anything you’ve ever experienced for. He’s like a machine, and his skilled cock as your head spinning.
“Daddy…daddy I…I can’t…you’re gonna make me cum-“ your words are cut off by just that, a loud shriek ripping through your lungs as you cum hard all over Logan’s cock just like he asked of you.
“That’s my fuckin’ girl, fuck yeah…you want Daddy to cum inside you baby? Yeah? Want Daddy to fill up this pretty pussy?” He growls out, his own eyes fluttering shut at the mere thought of cumming inside your pussy, filling you up and making him as your own.
You’re nodding like an idiot, all dumb and cock drunk as the pleasure fades and the overstimulation takes place, making your mind fuzzy and the world around you dull, the only thing you’re able to focus on being Logan.
“Please…want you to cum inside Daddy….wanna be yours” you moan out softly, your eyes rolling back as you allow Logan to continue fucking up into you mercilessly, turning your brain into mush with every thrust.
“All mine baby…all Daddy’s…fuck…that’s it baby…let daddy fill up this little pussy….fuckfuckfuck” Logan growls out, his moans strangled as he pulls you down roughly onto his lap, his cock twitching with every spurt of cum, painting your insides with his seed as his large hands press your sweaty body flush against his.
You both sit there like that for quite a while, his hands massaging your skin, thumbs rubbing small circles into your abdomen as you both try to catch your breath, the come down sucking all of the energy out of both of you while you enjoy the warmth of being connected to one another.
After a moment passes, you’re finally the one to break the silence, a gentle smirk on your face as you turn around a bit to face Logan.
“So….I guess it’s safe to say I am your type of girl after all?” You tease the man as you recall the words he’d said to you all those weeks ago.
It makes Logan groan softly as he cringes at himself, finally giving in and resting his chin against your shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek as he nods.
“Yeah….I guess you are princess…”
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thoughtportal · 1 year ago
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This is a developing news story and may be updated as more information is obtained. If you value such information, please support this Substack.
On Dec. 1, a woman immolated herself with a Palestinian flag outside the Israeli consulate in Atlanta.
Now, according to the Atlanta Fire Rescue Department, the woman — referred to in their report as “Jane Doe” — is alive and “in stable condition” at Grady Memorial Hospital, where she has been since the immolation.
After repeated requests for her name, the department stated to this reporter in an email that it “does not disclose the identities of victims”. Repeated inquiries to Grady, which is a public hospital, went unanswered. The hospital houses the Walter L. Ingram Burn Center.
“Jane Doe” is 27.
When asked if they had made any comment to tell the public that she was still alive this entire time, the official at Atlanta Fire Rescue Department said they “shared the last updated with local media via email on 12/21/23. The release stated: ‘The victim remains hospitalized in critical condition. The security guard, who attempted to assist the burn victim, has been released from the hospital.’” Several internet searches on that quote produce no results. This would also indicate that "Jane Doe" went from critical to stable condition without public notice. 
Aaron Bushnell immolated himself at the Israeli embassy in Washington, D.C. on Sunday, explaining “I will no longer be complicit in genocide” and shouting “Free Palestine!” repeatedly as he burned alive. So, his case — unlike many other self-immolations including Gregory Levey, Raymond Moules, Timothy T. Brown, Malachi Ritscher and others — has received some attention. Thus, “Jane Doe” being ignored fits with the usual pattern. Bushnell is the exception — probably because he livestreamed it. See “Ignoring Immolators Lulls the Society to Sleep.”
As Bushnell was burning himself alive, an officer pointed a gun at him, barking orders as if he constituted a threat. A security guard, Michael Harris, sustained injuries working to rescue “Jane Doe” — but there were similarities, where she was actually viewed as a potential threat.
At one point, the police report for “Jane Doe” refers to it as being a case of “arson”.
Much of the media coverage and general discussion of her self-immolation in December focused on if she had done damage. The Atlanta Police Chief said: “We believe this building remains safe, and we do not see any threat here.” The Israeli government released a statement: “It is tragic to see the hate and incitement toward Israel expressed in such a horrific way.”
Police records indicate that they obtained a search warrant and entered an apartment they believed to be associated with “Jane Doe” — initially using a drone:
The drone was able to relay information as to the layout and the belongings inside. After it was deemed "safe" entry was made with bomb technicians. While clearing the apartment no improvised explosive devices were located.
The police report also noted:
During the search a Quran was found in the bedroom along with a [sic] Arabic dictionary and a Hebrew dictionary. The bedroom bookshelf contained books related to fiction and fantasy. A "Drug use for grown ups" book was on the bookshelf as well. Two journals were seized from the bedroom. A thumbdrive was seized from the bedroom as well. A laptop computer was seized from the kitchen counter. A copy of the search warrant was left in the living room of the apartment. The front door [of] the apartment was secured before law enforcement left the premises.
When pressed for more information in compliance with an Open Records Request under Georgia law, Atlanta Fire Rescue Department claimed: “There is an ongoing and active investigation for the incident in question, which is why the only releasable information has been shared via the incident report. Investigative documentation is not available for release until the investigation is closed.”
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vxlvted · 1 month ago
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How do you think angry sex with Chris would go? Like, after a fight, maybe a jealousy fit? We all know he is hella respectful, but I truly believe in this case his mouth is spitting fire. The degradation is on another level, he'd say and do the most messed up shit. Of course, afterwards, he would be a puddle to your feet.
Jealous
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synopsis: Chan seems to think you and Jisung are a little too close.. and he gets a little jealous…
tags: smut, afab!reader, possessive (lowkey kinda toxic chan i think. idk but he’s very possessive), degradation, unprotected sex
a/n: idk what to think of this? I lowkey hate it lol, but let me know what you think!
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You, Jisung, Minho, and Chan are hanging out in Jisung and Minho’s shared dorm. You’re currently curled up on the floor near the coffee table, practically leaning into Jisung as the two of you share a ridiculous story from when you went out to eat earlier that week. His hand brushes your arm while he mimics someone’s voice and you double over laughing.
Across the room, Chan watched. He’s sat on the couch, one ankle resting on his opposite knee, jaw tight, arm sling over the back like he’s comfortable—but he’s not. His eyes flick to you, then to Jisung, then back to you again.
Your laughter is too.. free. Jisung is sat way too close. And you haven’t looked in Chan’s direction once in the past ten minutes.
He tells himself it’s nothing. You love him, not Jisung. But the way that you tilt your head at him with that soft smile, it stabs at something hot and unsettling in his chest.
You finally—finally—glance over to him. Chan’s gaze doesn’t waver. The look in his eyes is a little darker than usual, hooded and unreadable, but you don’t comment on it. You just offer a soft smile before standing up.
“I’ll be right back,” you say, the words directed more towards Jisung than him, as you head your way down the hall towards the bathroom.
The second the door closes behind you, Chan pushes himself to stand and quietly slips out of the room following right behind you. You’re halfway though washing your hands when there’s a soft knock on the door. “…It’s me.” comes Chan’s voice.
You blink, staring at the closed door.
“Can you let me in?”
Your stomach flips, you unlock the door and crack it open. Chan doesn’t wait, he pushes inside and shuts in behind him, and it locks with a click.
“What the hell was that?”
You narrow your eyes, “What was what?”
Chan scoffs, “You two were all over eachother. What the fuck was that about?”
You roll your eyes, “He’s just being nice.” Chan stops in his tracks, jaw clenched, eyes dark.
“Don’t play dumb with me. I know what you were trying to do.”
“What are you talking about? I’m not allowed to laugh with our friends? Am I supposed to sit around with my head down so no one gets the wrong idea?”
“I’m not stupid. You were flirting with him.” Chan whisper-yells, keeping his voice low so that the two in the living room don’t hear him.
“I wasn’t even flirting. You’re just being insecure,”
In one second he closed the space between you two, hand gripping your jaw firmly, tilting your face so you had no choice but to meet his furious gaze.
“I’m not being insecure, but if that’s what you think, fine. But don’t you dare act like you didn’t know what you were doing in there.”
You inhale sharply as your back hits the counter. “Chan..”
He bites his lip, “I just want you to remember who you belong to.” His mouth crashes onto yours before you can even think of a response, a mix of anger, frustration and desperation. His hands grip your hips, backing you into the counter and lifting you onto the counter like you weigh nothing.
“You want attention so bad?” He hissed against your mouth, “You’re gonna get it. Every. Fucking. Inch of it.”
You gasp against his lips as the cool marble meets the backs of your thighs and he swallows it greedily. His hands are already under your shirt, skimming your waist, pressing your bodies closer.
“You think I didn’t notice the way he looked at you?” he mutters against your mouth, dragging your shirt over your head. “The way you leaned into him?”
Your jeans are gone before you even realize he’s unbuttoned them, you tug at his shirt in retaliation, teeth grazing his jaw as he yanks it over his head and throws it somewhere behind him.
One hand slips between your legs as his mouth trails down your neck, teeth grazing your skn. You squirm beneath his hands, heat pooling fast and thick into your stomach.
You’re whimpering when his hand slips under the elastic of your panties and his fingers rub against you slick folds. He smirks against your neck. “That’s right. Only I get to touch you like this, make you this wet.”
“You like making me jealous, don’t you?” he growls. “You like when I lose control over you.”
You shake your head, breath ragged as you try and grind your hips against his fingers. “I don’t—I wasn’t trying—“ You cut yourself off with a moan as he presses one finger into you. You pull him closer by the front of his hoodie to try and connect you lips again.
Chan groans in response, deep and desperate. “You’re mine,” he grits out, finger quickly thrusting in and out of you, curling every so often to hit that one spot. “Say it.”
His words were filthy and his tone was mean. You let out a strangled moan, “Yours.. I’m yours.” you whisper. But the sudden loss of his fingers as he slides them out of you makes you whine, hips instinctively changing his hand.
You barely have anytime to catch your breath when you feel him slide into you and you grip his shoulder with a loud moan.
“That’s it. Louder.”
You let out chocked moans and whimpers of his name again and again, tears begin to run down your cheeks and your voice cracks as he thrusts into you with a ruthless rhythm. “Look at you,” he groans, lifting a hand to gently wipe your tears away. “So needy for me now.”
You bite your lip when you feel his tip graze onto your sweet spot, tucking your head down to his shoulder. His fingers tangle in your hair to pull your head back up.
“Don’t hide now, baby. You wanted this. Acting like a brat all night so that i’ll fuck you like this, yeah?” You shakily nod against his neck in response.
He gives a sharp tug that pulls a loud moan from your lips. So much for trying to be quiet, there’s no way they didn’t hear that, but at the moment, you couldn’t care less.
He leans in, lips brushing your ear. “Good girl. Let everyone hear you, baby.” His voice send a shiver down your spine. He shifts slightly, adjusting your legs so that your thighs are wrapped tightly around his waist. The new angle has him driving harder and deeper into you, and you can help but grind your hips down against him, desperate to meet every thrust.
His hand grips your hips, holding you in place like he’s afraid you’d disappear. Every thrust is rough, angry, desperate. He makes you feel every word, every breath.
You voice starts to falter a bit and your legs tremble around him. “You gonna cum for me?” he groans into your ear, “Cum on my dick baby, c’mon.”
You let out a moan and your body trembles with your release. Chan keeps thrusting into you as your legs fall slack around him, no longer able to hold themselves up. “Please—too much.” You whine as your nails dig into his arms. “Chan—“
“You can take it. Just a little more.” He grunts. Each snap of his hips sending an overwhelming wave of pleasure coursing through your veins. You feel the pace of his hips falter against you and his voice cracks with each hushed moan that escapes his lips.
“Fuck. I’m so close-“ he breathes. You lean in, pressing your lips to his in a desperate kiss, the two of you swallowing each moan that escapes each others lips.
“Come inside me.. please,” You whimper against his lips. Chan lets out a strained grunt in response, his thrusts growing faster, more desperate as he chases his own pleasure. One hand drops between your bodies, and his fingers rub at your clit in harsh, relentless circles. The overstimulation makes your breath hitch and you cry out as you feel another climax quickly building.
His hips still, and you feel him twitch inside you as spurts of warm cum begin to coat your walls. The sensation of him releasing inside you sends you spiraling all over, and your climax crashes over you as your legs tremble against the counter.
There’s a long silence filled with nothing other but the sound of your heavy breathing. Then you feel his arms tighten around your waist, pulling you close.
“I.. You know I didn’t mean that right?” Chan murmurs into your neck, voice hoarse and wrecked with emotion. “I was just…fuck. I was jealous. I’m sorry. I took it out on you, and I shouldn’t have.”
You don’t answer right away, your body still trembling. You finger find their way into his hair, gently threading through the strands. “I know,” you whisper. “But really, I wasn’t trying to do anything.”
He pulls back enough just to look at you, guilt flooding his eyes. “I know, I know. I just.. the thought of anyone even looking at you like that, touching you..” He trails off, jaw clenching as he presses a kiss to your temple.
“It messes with my head.” He admits softly, “But it’s not your fault. I just can’t loose you. Even though I know the kids would never.. the thought of someone else even trying just—I’m sorry.”
“You’re not gonna loose me.” Your voice is a bit hoarse, but there’s no hesitation in it. The reassurance seems to calm him a bit and he nods. He finally pulls put, breathing still a bit shaky. His fingers lazily trace your thigh as he watches, completely hypnotized as a slow, messy is of both yours and his cum begins to slowly drip out of you and down onto the counter.
“Fuck..” he mutters, low and gravelly, thumb brushing your inner thigh, almost in awe. “Look at that…”
You chest still rises and falls with each shaky breath you take as you glance down than back up to watch as he steps away and grabs some tissue for you (and to clean the counter).
You smirk, “You think Jisung will be mad that we fucked in his bathroom?”
Chan lets out a breathy laugh and his eyes flicker to yours. He leans forward, kissing your collarbone.
“Oops,” he murmurs, voice low and smug and clearly not sorry in the slightest.
“It’s no secret, i’m sure they heard,” His words send a flush down your neck. “I’ll just turn the fan on when he leave.”
You laugh, quiet and breathlessly, taking the tissue he offers you to clean yourself up while he cleans the counter.
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Taglist:
If you’d like to be put on (or taken off) the taglist, feel free to let me know
@yaorzu-blog | @pixie-felix | @compersian | @tshyn | @kittenchaos2024 | @lze325
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theliving-radio · 2 months ago
Note
The reader turning into a child due to a potion has planted an idea into my brain and I feel like I have to share.
Reader getting hit with a potion that turns them into a baby dragon (like how baby Mal looked during chapter 7) :>
Omg BABY DRAGON SIBLING!!!
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It would make more sense if it was ADeuce and Grim causing the problem again, Professor Crewel felt like it would make tons of sense if it was! What didn’t make sense was the fact that the cause of it was Sebek, Epel, and Jack.
Crewel was currently looking down at where the Prefect was once standing. Now, sitting in their place was a lizard the size of a purse dog. The creature looked up at him with their big glossy eyes, then tilted their head to the side.
Epel, Jack, and Sebek just stood nearby, unsure what to say. Yeah, they might have made the wrong potion… yeah they might have accidentally spilled it on the Prefect… and yeah, they don’t know how to fix it…
Professor Crewel doesn’t say anything and just walks away, getting ready to make an antidote.
“… so does that mean we have to watch them now?” Epel finally spoke up as he looked down at the little lizard… wait were those wings?
Jack crouches down and picks up the transformed Prefect. “I don’t think we have much of a choice… did they turn into a dragon?”
“Humph! Are you trying to compare this useless creature to what Waka-sama represents?! Malleus is ten times better than what the Prefect is now!”
At Sebek’s words, you turn your head towards him… and blow out green flames towards the half-fae.
Jack holds you away from him.
Epel lets out a startled scream.
And Sebek is now currently trying to put out the fire that is on his uniform jacket.
Meanwhile you were just staring at the chaotic mess you created, blinking at Sebek as he was patting down at the green fire. Epel pointed his mage pen at Sebek and doused him in water.
Now stood a wet, and irritated Sebek.
“YOU- HOW DARE-!” Sebek was filled with so much anger he couldn’t even properly finish his sentence.
Jack walked over to one of the desks and placed your tiny lizard body there. You stare up at the Wolf Beast-men and start letting out small clicking sounds, as if trying to say something.
You start to stand on your hind legs and try to lean more forward, wanting to be held again. Unfortunately Jack didn’t get the memo, and you started screeching.
All three of the first-years cover their ears at the sound of your high pitch cry.
“Ah! What do we do?! What does the Prefect want!”
“YOU THINK I SHOULD KNOW?!” Sebek snapped at Epel, making them both argue as Jack tried to cover his large ears the best he could.
The loud yelling and screeching stopped as the classroom door swung open. There, stood Malleus Draconia in all his glory, heaving and panting as he ran all the way here.
"Where? Where are they?" Malleus huffs out as he scans around the room.
Another screech was let out from your tiny body, and Malleus quickly turns his gaze and locks onto you. His breath gets caught in his throat as he's suddenly hit with a sense of déjà vu.
"W-waka-sama!? What are you doing here?!"
Malleus ignores Sebek as he makes his way over to you. Once you notice his presence, you began clicking at him. Through all your clicking, all Malleus could hear is:
"Mal Mal! Mal Mal!"
This was his Baby Sibling!
Without a second thought, Malleus scoops you up and holds your tiny dragon body close to his own. You began to purr, causing the dragon fae to smile.
"Um... Malleus-senpai?" Epel spoke up, hoping to get the fae's attention, but he was ignored.
Malleus makes his own clicking sounds, clearly communicating with the dragon version of his baby sibling. You let out a loud yawn, followed by a small squeak. Malleus had to hold himself together before he crumbled into dust from how cute you were.
The first years all held their breath as Malleus turned to them. This was it, wasn't it? They were gonna die due to their stupid mistake.
"Sebek... I need you to stall Professor Crewel from making the antidote."
Huh?
"Just as Spade and Trappola made their own mistake, I did not punish them. Just how I won't punish you three. Your mistake turned into a blessing. Now! I must find Lilia, hopefully he still has the baby carrier out."
Malleus gracefully walks past the first years and out of the classroom, happily holding onto his Baby Sibling who he continues to purr and make clicking sounds towards.
Sebek, Jack, and Epel just stood there in pure shock at what just occurred.
"Did that just happen? Did he just steal away the Prefect?" Epel broke the silence again, trying to make sense of what he just saw.
Sebek snaps out of his daze and quickly walks out of the classroom.
"Hey! Where are you going?" Jack blinks as the half-fae rushes by him.
"Waka-sama needs me to stall the Professor!"
Epel and Jack just watch as the croc sprints out to go find the professor.
Well, the rest of the day was gonna be eventful.
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wh1msic4lwasab1 · 2 months ago
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⁺‧₊˚ ཐི His⋆♱⋆Affliction ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺
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snyopsis: The vampire Alucard finds an injured traveler at his doorsteps, and nurses her back to health. Though what happens during your recovery is woefully unexpected, but intrinsically welcomed.
tags: porn w/plot (rare for me lmao), he fell first but you fall harder type trope, yearning, pining, slow burn (i tried), passionate, penetration, cunnalingus, cum eating, fingering, hair pulling, marking, biting, bloodletting, creampie, praise, usuage of “darling”, “dear”, “da draga mea” (“yes my dear” in romanian). L bomb gets dropped bc yk what, hell yeah?, pathetic alucard bc absolutely yes
word count: 11.5k wowza
a/n: a true passion project i love you alucard THANK YOU @cosmicporos for helping me with ideas for this fic mwah and also @eridanusco for informally requesting LMAO. Also sorry i dont know how to end fics pls let me live guys pls i tried :(
(click the title for a playlist! I listened to it a billion times when writing this)
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Sounds of a distance neigh grew closer and closer to the ear of the blonde dhampir- who sat desolate inside cold walls. Your loyal steed, galloped you to the tall castle doors, pacing back and forth, whining for attention until The Alucard finally came down and took your lumbering body inside, and your horse to the stable of course, he’s not a monster…as much as he beleive so.
After what seemed to feel like a coma, you open your eyes to the stinging rays of sunlight that pass your eyelids; Waking up to a room unfamiliar and a man even moreso.
Alucard sat in a wooden chair that smelled of the same cedar he tended the fire with.
As the scent and the sight hit your senses, you rustled up and back into the corner of the walls in a hurried panic.
Alucard's eyes widened a bit, surprised by your wake. He gently placed his occupying book down and slowly got up from the chair, holding his hands up as if to show you he meant no harm.
"Easy, easy now...calm down. You're safe."
“Who the hell are you-“ you question in fright at his fanged teeth.
He gave a slight frown, eyes shifting a bit as he studied you.
“This is my home, your wounds…you’ve been here just short of a day.”
He explained, keeping his distance to not further frighten you- pointing to your abdomen.
“You're- a vampire?!!”
He chuckled slightly, not amused by the fear in your eyes but understanding your reaction”
"Half vampire, actually” He went on, “But I mean you no harm, you have my word."
“You could be lying”.
He raised an eyebrow, a hint of irritation in his voice at the accusation
"You'll have to trust me on that, won't you? If I wanted to hurt you, I could've done so long ago. You were passed out and bleeding on your horse's back."
Realization hit you, his arms crossing over his chest as you stay silent in protest.
"You were quite injured, I patched you up the best I could and kept you in this room to rest. Please allow me to heal you back to health completely.”
You stay in the corner of the bed with your hands clutched onto the thick fur blanket. You give him a nod, accepting his proposal, although reluctantly.
He nods back, sensing the fear and uncertainty radiating off of you but appreciative that you aren’t too stubborn.
"It would've been wrong to leave you to bleed out in the woods." He said, slowing returning to the fire and book.
“I didn’t know vampires had morality.” You retort, slipping out of your mouth without much thought.
He but only chuckles, you can almost hear his smile as he speaks, low and soft.
“I’ve had my share of…distasteful humans. But your horse made a good case for you, you know.”
You have to almost stop a smile- becoming more comfortable by the second with his seeming civility.
Not too comfortable, though, feeling the bandages around your waist.
He looks back and sees you touching them through your shirt.
“Can I see them?” He asks, walking closer to you now with a voice of concern.
You nod.
He sat down on the edge of the bed, being careful not to touch you unnecessarily, reaching out and gently unwrapping the bandages, his movements slow and deliberate as he revealed the wounds beneath.
You wince slightly at the cool air hitting your broken skin, your stomach flexing inwards and your lungs expanding.
He pauses for a moment as you flinch, his eyes flicking up to your face.
"I'm sorry, I'll be gentle," he says softly before continuing to unwrap the bandages, revealing the cuts and gashes on your body. His expression hardened again as he took in the extent of your injuries, his fingers tracing lightly over the wounds, gentle and steady.
“How do they feel?” He asks, taking all the bandages off and reaching to the nightstand for more.
“Fine” You reply.
"Are you sure you're feeling alright? I can sense your emotions, you know. And you're not very good at hiding them."
You feel your brows contort into irritation, you dont even know what for- maybe your innate distrust.
"What, you're mad that I can read you so easily?" He replied with a smile, enjoying your annoyed expression a little more than he thought.
“It's a bit annoying…” You say, raising your brows, with a sprinkle of sass.
He smirked again, his lips playful.
"Well, I'm sorry if it's annoying. But you're quite expressive. It's hard not to notice when you look like that.”
“Like what-?” You retort.
“That.” He replies quickly, making you swallow your words.
You watch as he redresses your wounds, taking his time to wrap the bandages around your waist and stomach.
You take that time to look at his face more carefully than before- being this close to a vampire wasn’t something you think you’d live long enough to be able to observe like this.
You noticed his light amber hair, his yellow eyes and long lashes that gave him an epicene charm. You couldn’t keep your curious eyes from wandering over his features, he smelled like oud and iron.
When he was done, you looked out toward the open window, the sill swaying back and forth as the wind dance.
“How long will they take to heal?” You ask as you look back down at his hands.
"It depends. The wounds were quite severe, so it may take a while for them to fully close. The medicine should accelerate the healing process, but it's not instantaneous.”
“Okay- well, if it's fine i'll return to my town then by tomorrow.”
His expression shifted to surprise at your statement.
"You want to leave already? You're not fully healed yet, it's not safe for you to go back out there. They could open, get infection, you could get-“
“I don't wish to bother you any longer- you've already helped me enough.” You state. You’ve been quite wary about vampires- raised to practically believe they were spawns of hell itself.
He raised an eyebrow, his surprise quickly replaced by a hint of irritation
"Bother me? Nonsense. You're a guest in my home, and I don't intend to just let you wander off into danger when you're just as injured as when I found you.”
“It's still an inconvenience…”
He lets out an annoyed sigh, crossing his arms over his chest.
"You're insufferable, you know that?” It's not an inconvenience. You're my responsibility now, whether you like it or not.”
You let out an equally annoyed huff, but you don’t bother to object anymore, clearly stuck and indefensible.
“Fine”. You breathe out.
He gave you a firm nod, satisfied that you had agreed to stay.
"Good. You'll stay here until you're fully healed. I won't have you running off and getting yourself killed out there."
He watched you as you settled back into bed, his expression softening slightly
"I'll be back to check on you later. Try not to do anything reckless while I'm gone." He says, walking out the door.
“Wait!” You shout.
He pauses in the doorway, turning to look at you.
"Yes?"
“What’s your name?”
“Alucard”, is what you hear before the shut of the door.
You hear his descending footsteps on the floor of the castle, plopping your head back into the goosefeather pillows as you stared at the brick ceiling, trying to get comfortable again, as much as you could considering your circumstance.
Hours had passed, and sleep didn’t miss you on its way.
Alucard had come back to your room, opening it after not hearing any confirmation at his soft knocks.
He saw your sleeping state and moved quietly as to make sure sure not to disturb you, scanning over your form, taking note of your condition and whether you were in any pain or discomfort even if your unconsciousness.
He leaned over and placed a hand on your forehead, checking for a fever or sweats.
After making his observations, his eyes lingered on your hair, fingers carefully brushing against a few strands as he withdraws his hand.
He found himself captivated by the color and texture, a hint of curiosity flickering within as the sunlight filtered through the window and casted a warm glow over your skin, the smooth contours of your face and neck.
He looked at your physiognomy in almost jealously, envious of your humanness. The feeling of your warm skin coursing with blood that hadn’t yet gone through the process of death. He brushed his knuckle softly against your cheekbone but quickly removed it once he felt you slowly stir away.
You crack your eyes open and flutter your flashes as the setting sun pokes at your lids again.
“Is it evening already?”
He nods, his voice low and quiet, walking around the corners of the room to light the candles scattered around to offer some light before the moons arrival.
"Yes, it's getting late. You've been asleep for quite a while."
You let out a long drawn yawn and attempt to sit up near the headboard.
He watches, eyes tracking your every move. He can see the pain and stiffness in your movements, a pang of guilt tugging at him for not being able to do anything for you in that moment.
"Careful," he murmurs, voice taint with concern. "You're still injured, remember? You shouldn't be sitting up yet. Let your body heal."
“I can't just sleep all day.”
"Yes, you can”…He continues, trying to push through without the conversation. “You're still recovering. You need to take it easy and let your body heal itself. Sleeping is the best way to do that." He crosses his arms over his chest, a hint of frustration in his voice over your seemingly unmovable persistence.
You frown at his scolding, crossing your arms back.
"What's with the pout? You look like a petulant child."
You scoff, leaning your head back and mouth slightly agape.
“That's rude...”
He chuckles, a smirk growing at your response.
"Is it? I was merely stating the truth.
You're acting like a spoiled brat who doesn't want to listen to their caretaker."
“I'm just tired of sleeping so much...”
“Well I can’t just let you run around and frolick can I?”
You pout again, knowing he’s right but not wanting to agree out of…pettiness.
He shakes his head and sighs, “Stay here, I’ll bring you some food”.
“Yeah sure i’ll stay! No problem Doctor!” You say with fringed enthusiasm. “Can’t really go run and frolick can I…?” You mumble after.
“I heard that.” He says as he walks out, making you chuckle a bit.
As you wait, your stomach growls even more, wondering what kind of food you’ll be given. With all the wealth and luxury displayed in just the small portion of the castle you’ve been limited to witness- you had set your expectations high….unfortunately.
He comes back not more than an hour or so later- hair tied up in a low messy bun and what seems to be flour on his pants.
You see Alucard bring in a tray of a small loaf of bread and a bowl of what smelled like plain chicken stock, small floating pieces of carrot.
He sits down next to the bed, putting the tray on the edge of the bed before helping you sit up just a bit so you could eat.
You look at him and then the food- the silence and your inactive made him scoff.
“Are you hands broken all of a sudden? Do you need me to feed you?” He says bluntly, raising his brows in disbelief of your shamelessness.
You gave him a shrug and innocent expression smile- but he lets himself fall to your poorly executed manipulation.
He tears a piece of the what you can only imagine is some kind of buckwheat bun, as he dips it into the plain soup.
“Fattening me up so you can eat me?” You say as the soup soaked bread moves closer to your mouth.
He rolls his eyes and holds it closer to you to take a bite.
Before you open your mouth to accept the bread, you catch a wiff of the smell and…your head tilts away swiftly.
“Oh gods- you don’t even need to fatten me that’s gonna kill me first!” You say as you shake your head.
“What? Stop being dramatic. It’s just bread, here” He says, tilting your head back toward his face and the bread.
“Where did you get that? Did my horse produce it?!”
Alucard furrows his brows and scoffs.
“I made this…it took a while by the way.”
Your eyes widen- not knowing if you should be surprised and touched that he attempted to make you food or if you should be alarmed at how horribly it went.
“Oh…”
He sighs, “Is it really that bad..? What do you humans even eat besides bread and beer?”
You scoot back a bit, creating a good distance away from the bread.
“Is this- just chicken stock?” You ask, trying to find any kind of compliment to give him.
He looks at you deadpanned, and you have to stifle a smile.
“I should have gave that carrot to the damn horse…” He mumbled before getting up to leave with the tray.
“Wait wait!” You laugh as you protested, waving your arms back up to urge him to stay.
“I’ll try it…since you went out of your way.”
He sighs, giving you another chance and placing the tray back on your lap.
You have to gather more courage than you might have ever before- taking the same piece of bread he tore and counting your blessing before putting it into your mouth.
Truthfully- the chicken stock made it somewhat bearable, masking the stale like gummy texture of the bread…and swallowing it before it could bother you too much.
Alucard watched at the bedpost, arms crossed as he observed your expression.
You look up at him after the first bite, tilting your head back and forth and twisting your arm to try and say it wasn’t too aweful.
He lets outs a chuckle and sits back down on the chair; occupying his earlier read as he waits for you to finish your meal.
As soon as you’re finished, he glances at the empty bowl and plate, a hint of relief in his eyes
"You ate everything, good. It's important to keep your strength up while you're recovering."
You simply nod, not wishing you further frustrate him over his cooking inability.
"Get some rest now. You need it."
He takes the tray and turns to leave, but once again hesitates at the door, as if his body screams at him to stay longer than needed.
Looking back at you; his eyes roaming over your face as if committing it to memory.
“I never got your name, now that I think about it. I think I’d like to know what to address you as.”
You hesitate for a moment- but it’s the least you could offer, formality wise.
“Y/n.” You respond.
He replies in almost a whisper.
"Goodnight, Y/n." He smiles.
He won’t be going to bed anytime soon but he hopes your rest is committed.
“Goodnight, Alucard.”
Again is the shut of the door, and you know you won’t see him again til the next morning.
After he leaves the room, he stand in the hallway for a moment, lost in thought- he feels a heaviness in his chest at the sound of his name on your lips. It’s been a long time since anyone has said his name at all- nor with as much tenderness and void of disdain as the way in which you spoke it.
The next day comes, much like the last in its configuration, just as the next few would likely follow.
Alucard comes in and moves quietly around, tending to the small fire in the hearth and tidying up a bit around your room; keeping his movements soft and silent, not wanting to disturb the peaceful atmosphere while you sleep.
He notices the moment you start to stir, his eyes flickering towards your sleeping figure on the bed. He watches you wake, and a hint of a smile plays at the corners of his lips as he watches you blink sleepily.
“Goodmorning”, you hear from the vampire, chuckling as he sees you stretch. “Sleep well?”.
You reply with a nod, yawning greatly before giving him a “Mhm”.
He feels a sense of relief wash over him, glad that you were able to get some restful sleep. Moving closer to the bed, his eyes scan over you for any signs of discomfort.
"That's good to hear. How are you feeling? Any pain?"
You shake my head, truthfully feeling much lighter than the previous day. You sit up so you can present your wounds to him.
He nods in approval, satisfied assurance while he steps closer to the bed until he sits on the edge, gently reaching out to examine your wounds, his fingers lightly brushing over the bandages that cover your injuries and unwrapping you.
"They're healing well. You're lucky you didn't sustain any serious damage."
He relays, his palms trailing down your sides as he tries to feel for any swelling, and you seem to find your throat a bit dry.
He can hear you gulp, and he reluctantly pulls his hands away and starts to wrap you with new bandages, rolling your shirt back down.
“Thank you”, you reply, trying to fill the empty space between you two, even if it’s just verbal.
He pauses for a moment, surprised by your words. He hadn't expected you to thank him, and the sincerity in your voice catches him off guard.
He clears his throat again, trying to maintain his demeanor.
"You don't need to thank me. I'm just doing what I can to ensure your recovery."
You smile and nod, impressed by his humbleness.
“Do you think, I can go outside now?
Maybe for a walk.” You ask.
He hesitates, considering your request. Youve been confined to the room for almost a week now, and the thought of you getting some sun wasn’t the worst.
"Hm...I suppose it would be good for you to get some fresh air. But only for a little while. You're still recovering, so you shouldn't push yourself too much."
You smile even wider, glad that he wasn’t cruel or unreasonable.
“Thank you, will you join me?” You offer.
He feels his brows contort with confusion, but he can't help the small smile that follows.
"Me? You want me to go with you?"
“Well i've never been to this part of the country- i’m not so used to it.
He chuckles softly, finding your naiveté endearing
"I see. Very well, I'll accompany you on your walk." He replies, coming back to the edge of the bed and helping you up, putting out his forearm for you to hold yourself up with- making sure you don't stumble or fall.
"Take it slow. You might be a bit unsteady at first."
You hold on tight, feeling your limbs finally stretch out after hours of laying down with not much breaks.
He watches you carefully, his eyes following your every move. He notices the warmth of your hands on his arm, gripping and clinging to him so tight, and the closeness of your body sends a current through his body- and he finds himself putting a bit more effort into trying to push down the strange feelings that are bubbling up inside him, because of you.
"Easy there. Don't push yourself too hard."
Once he makes note of your posture, he slowly releases your arm, though keeping a hand hovering nearby, just in case you need support.
“Do you happen to have any clothes?” You ask, wanting to get into something more fresh compared to your tattered and messy clothing.
"Yes, I think I do. Stay here.” He says, quickly moving out of the room to retrieve them and arriving again only minutes later with a neatly folded stack of garments in his arms.
He hands them to you, his eyes flickering over your figure as he does so.
"These should fit you. Let me know if they don't."
You take the small pile with both hands and go to the washroom of your familiar room to change.
Alucard waited patiently outside the door, his mind racing as he imaged you changing inside- hearing the rustling of fabric and wanting to ask if you needed help but he didn’t want to overstep- didn’t want to make you suspect anything more of it all.
Desperately he tried to push the thoughts down into the back of his head, but they keep creeping up, making his heart race and his palms sweat a bit.
When you emerged back out in the clothes he gave you, his eyes almost widened, a faint melancholy in his gaze.
“What…you look like you want to say something.” You ask.
He looks back into your eyes as he’s snapped out of his thoughts.
“Sorry- sorry…no you look fine. It’s just that” He rambled on, “The clothes belonged to my mother, they suite you.”
Your brows rise at the information and your stomach drops a bit- feeling sorrow for him in his dark undertones. But you stay silent.
“Alright”, he continues, draping a red scarf around your neck.
“Keep this on, it’s cold in the mornings.” He says as he pulls your hair up from the scarf and lays it behind your shoulders, fingers brushing your ears slightly as he stands much closer now.
You only nod, allowing him to open the door and lead you out of the room for the first time.
When you step out of your enclosure of a room, you feel the smooth velvet carpet rolling out into the deep hallways of the ancient castle, soothing the soles of your bare feet as you walk alongside Alucard, looking around at the ceilings and the fixtures that adorn the home.
He watches as you take in the grandeur of the castle, a hint of pride in his eyes. He’s lived here for so long, but he sometimes forgets how impressive it must look to outsiders
"It's a bit much, I know. But it's been in my family for generations."
“No, it’s beautiful. Really.” You assure, taking everything in as you finally get to explore the place you’ve been locked up in.
He smiles again at your words, feeling a small swell of warmth in his chest. Expecting you like most people to be intimidated or scared by the castle's size and antiquity, but he can tell you seem genuinely impressed by it.
"Thank you. My father, Dracula, had it built many years ago. He desired opulence." He says with cadence.
As he explains more of the building’s interior, you both finally reach a exit. You can hear the chirping of birds and the wind on the other side as if a portal to an unexplored grove were near.
Alucard pushes the heavy doors open, revealing the sprawling gardens outside. The morning sun is casting a warm golden glow over the landscape.
The gardens- a riot of color, with blooming flowers and lush greenery filling every inch of space.
He watched as you step out into the grass. He can't help but find the sight of you barefoot in the garden endearing, your toes sinking into the soft earth as you breathe in the sweet spring air.
You open your eyes and look up, appreciating the sky from below opposed to the window from a distance as to which you were forced to do for the past few days.
Alucard, though, doesn’t follow your gaze. He instead can't help but admire the way the sun catches in your hair, and on your skin, making you look like you're glowing. A second, much more beautiful sun.
He finds himself staring for a moment, mesmerized by your beauty.
He also notices the way you hold the shawl closer to your body, and he wonders if you're cold or if there's something else you're trying to hide. He tries to resist the urge to reach out and brush a stray strand of hair out of your face again, wanting to feel just an atom of your being, as if to merge them with his.
He step closer, concern etched on his face
"Are you cold?"
You look back at him, your brows contorted and a soft look of vulnerability on your face.
“A little”, you admit.
He sees the goosebumps emerged on your soft and sunkissed skin, and he frowns slightly.
He takes the coat off his back, and drapes it over your shoulders
"Here, this should help." He says as he pulls you closer to him, your shoulders rubbing up as he keeps the draped jacket close around you, a bit too big but enough to warm you.
You give him an appreciative smile, and he returns one right back.
He watches you return your eyes back on the scenery, his gaze softening as he sees the way you admire the beauty of the world around you.
He’s seen this view countless times before, smelled the same air and felt the same breeze pass him by. But somehow, it seems more vibrant with you here with him now.
“Would you like to go back inside now?” You ask.
He shakes his head, not wanting the moment to end just yet.
"Not yet. Let's stay out here a little longer. Is that okay?” He asks softly.
You nod, happy that he’s willing to indulge you in just a bit more time outside.
You can’t help but feel his eyes glancing to you every now and then- and you try to ignore the urge to get closer to him.
Not for warmth, or because of the cold, or anything other than the flickering need to be closer to him.
Something entirely separate, something entirely unfamiliar.
After another few minutes, you two decide to come back inside to prevent any possibility of you catching a cold.
Alucard shows you a few more hallways and rooms along the way, pointing them onto and providing a little history lesson every now and then, not wanting to bombard you with his entire lifetimes worth of stories. When you arrive back at your room, he watches you settle back into the bed. A strange mix of emotions swirling within him. he wants to stay with you, but he knows he should give you some space.
He lingers in the doorway for a moment before speaking up again.
"If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. I'll be around."
You smile and nod, “Thank you”. You whisper.
“Of course. I'll be in the library if you need me." He hesitates for a moment, as if he wants to say something more, but then he turns and walks away, leaving you alone in the room, leaving the door open this time- as if inviting you to join him.
Maybe you’re just thinking too much into it.
As he sits down on the wooden library chairs, trying to concentrate on the book in his hand and the ink that sticks to his quill, his thoughts keep drifting back to you, wondering what you're doing in your room and if you're comfortable.
He can't shake the feeling that he's being drawn to you like a moth to a flame- in an inseparable trap he set himself. His affliction.
Lost in his own mind, he snaps out of it as he hears a knock at the library door. He looks up, setting his book down to calls out.
"Come in."
You hear his command, opening the tall doors and peaking your head in to find him.
He looks up as you enter the space, his eyes widening slightly as you approach closer and walk down the sparse steps- secretly trying to hide the fact that he was thinking about you just seconds ago.
"Ah, I wasn't expecting you so soon.
Is everything alright?" He asks, feeling his heart suddenly accelerate.
“Yeah, sorry” You reply, handing him back his jacket, “you just forgot this”.
As he takes the jacket from you, his finger brushing against yours for a brief moment that he curses himself for not keeping it a second longer.
He looks at it for a moment before looking back at you.
"Ah, thank you. I didn't realize I had left it behind." He says in a more hoarse tone than usual.
You chuckle and nod, “I also didn't realize.” You say in a lighthearted tone.
He chuckles softly in return, his eyes locked on yours- Acutely aware of the way your scent fills the air around him, intoxicating him with its sweetness.
"I suppose I was too distracted this morning to notice."
He finds it harder and harder to resist the urge to reach out to you, to pull you closer to him with each growing second.
You break the short lapse of silence, your eyes trailing down to the desk full of books and sheets of freshly inked script.
“Reading?”
He also glances at the books on the table, trying to compose himself.
"Ah, yes. I was just doing some light reading. and annotation. Trying to take my mind off things." He says before looking back at you, his gaze lingering on your face. H can feel the tension between you growing, the air heavy with unspoken words and emotions
“What, uhm- kind of things?” You ask, immediately feeling as if you overstepped.
He hesitates for a moment, unsure if he should be honest with you. but he can't bring himself to lie.
"You." He speaks.
You nod, understanding as you touch your wound on your side- Assuming he’s referring to your injuries, knowing how much he cares to treat you. Pushing away the initial thoughts of affection, not wanting to get your hopes up.
He nods, a small sigh escaping his lips. He conflicts with himself- wanting to tell you every preoccupied thought he’s had of you since the moment he found you on the back of his horse.
"Yes, that. And other things." He slips in quietly.
“You should rest, you’re not well enough to be up for so long.” He says a bit more sternly.
You furrow your brows a bit in unease, wishing he elaborated.
“Right.” You respond plainly.
He sees the disappointment in your eyes and immediately regrets his words. He didn't mean to push you away, but he's afraid of letting his guard down, of getting too close to you.
He runs a hand through his hair, feeling frustrated with himself
"I just... I don't want you to overexert yourself."
“It’s fine-“ You reply quickly, not wanting to invest more emotional energy into the exchange, exiting the library and walking back to your room, each step heavy and unrelenting as if your body rejects being away from him.
He watches your back as you leave, his heart sinking at the sound of your steps descending in volume. He wants to call out to you, to tell you to stay, but the words stick in his throat like a lozenge.
He sits there for a moment, frozen in place, before cursing himself under his breath. He knows he's messed up, but he's not sure how to fix it just yet.
Alucard remains in the library, pacing back and forth restlessly, still. He can't focus on anything, his mind consumed by thoughts of you.
He curses himself for being so awkward and aloof, for not being able to express his feelings properly even if they aren’t all fleshed out and appropriate.
He wants to follow you, to make things right, but he's afraid of what might happen if he does. So he stays in the library, brooding and frustrated, feeling more alone than ever.
You on the other hand, stay cooped up in your room. Equally frustrated- pacing around the bed unaware of how similar you both seem to cope.
You stay until the sun sets, wondering if he’ll show anytime soon to check up on you like he has been- angrily ruffled into the bedsheets as you almost wish you never went to the library, wishing you just left it at the peaceful garden walk from this morning.
“Fuck it?” You think to yourself, just go. “Just get up…walk over to him and figure it out? Right?” What even is there to figure, maybe, you were just overthinking.
You put your hand on the doorknob, resting before you swing it open.
As you prepare to take the first step out your eyes widen at the sight of him right infront of you with his hand raised.
He freezes in his tracks, surprised to see you standing in the doorway. He hadn't expected you to open the door just as he was about to knock, and his face looking more pale than before, somehow.
He looks at you, heart racing as he takes in the sight- feeling a mix of relief and nervousness, unsure of what to say or do next.
“…Hi.” You break the silence.
He swallows hard, his palms feeling clammy. He forces himself to speak, his voice sounding hoarse and awkward
"Hey. I was just coming to check on you." He drew on.
“I was also going to find you.” You confess.
He raises an eyebrow, surprised by your words. He hadn't expected you to be looking for him as well, his hopes rocking up.”
"Were you?"
“Yeah well- it's evening so I figured you'd want to check up on me again.” You sidetrack, dancing around the idea of anything else.
He nods, feeling a pang of guilt.
He had been avoiding you all day, and yet here you were, still thinking about him and his routine. Sure, he was too, but he hated the idea of burdening you with such heavy feelings in his care.
"Right, of course. I should've been more on top of it."
You nod, letting him into the room as you go to sit down on the bed as he follows you, his heart pounding in his chest. Why?
He can feel a tension between you two, one that’s been bubbling and thickening like a witches brew.
He tries to focus on the task at hand, but his mind keeps drifting to other things as he approaches you, his hand trying not to linger too long- prudent in his action.
He keeps his gaze clinical as he examines the wounds, rolling your shirt up and unwrapping the bandaged, but it's hard not to notice the softness of your skin beneath his fingers.
He gently touches the edges of the scars, his touch cautious as he checks for any signs of infection or irritation.
He’s aware of how close he is to you, how intimate the situation is, how for the past few days that he’s tried to ignore- scared of pushing himself onto you in any way.
He can feel the heat radiating off your body, and it's making it difficult for him to concentrate as he can see you watching him.
He glances up at you, his eyes locking with yours for a brief moment.
“You look worried....”
He looks up at you again, his expression serious.
"It's just... the scars are still a bit red. I'm worried about infection."
You nod, your expression also turning more stone.
He frowns, his fingers tracing the edges of the scars lightly.
"I'll have to keep a closer eye on them. Make sure they don't get worse."
You nod, wincing slightly as he touches them.
He immediately stops touching the scars, his expression softening.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." He whispers.
“It's okay- it just stings a little”. You assure.
But he still feels a pang of guilt at the thought of causing you pain, even if it was accidental.
"I'll try to be more careful. I just want to make sure they're healing properly." He goes on, feeling himself open up more- wanting to tell you just how much he cares.
He wraps you back up in new dressing, rolling your shirt down again and leaning down toward you.
“Hold onto me, I’ll help you up.” He says softly, putting his arms around your back as you wrap yours around the back of his neck, holding into him for support as he helps you up onto your feet without too much trouble.
For just a moment your chests press up- but soon letting go.
Alucard steps back, not wanting to cross any lines- but gods is his mind absolute chaos right now.
The feeling of your body closer than it’s ever been- the feeling of almost embracing you was too much for him to handle.
You clear your throat, leaning back against the bedpost, “Earlier today...in the library...”, you go on.
He perks back up, “Yes? What about it?”
“I'm sorry if i seemed too insistent, you probably wanted to be alone”…
He shakes his head, a hint of amusement in his eyes.
"Don't apologize. You didn't seem insistent at all. If anything, I found your curiosity endearing."
He sends you a smile, a softer look.
"And I must admit, it was nice to have some company in the library for once. I've been alone for so long that l've almost forgotten what it's like to talk to someone…”
You smile back, “Me too.”
He returns your easygoingness, “You're not just saying that to make me feel better, are you?"
“I'm not, it's making me feel better too.”
He chuckles, a bit deeper this time.
"I see. So you're not just a beautiful woman with a sharp mind, you're also honest."
“I hope to be”, you reply wittingly.
“Honesty is a rare quality, you know.
Most people will say anything to get what they want, or to avoid hurting your feelings. But you... you seem to speak your mind without a second thought…Especially about my bread.”
You roll your eyes place and scoff, “I’ll never hear the end of it from you.”
“I’m still hurt.” He says, feigning offense.
The two of you exchange a few more pleasantries, both reveling in the fact that your issues from earlier have been mended and quickly forgotten. Thankfully.
Alucard glances out the window, seeing the darkness of the night outside and hearing your yawn.
"It's late. You should probably get some rest, as much as I wish to keep talking.” He adds on quickly.
You nod, opening the door as he walks out into the doorway.
“Goodnight, dear.” He says politely.
You respond with a kiss on his cheek, quick and gentle.
“Goodnight.” You say with a soft smile, and and shut the door on his dumbfounded face.
He stands there for a moment, stunned by your unexpected kiss.
His hand comes up to touch the spot where your lips had been, a look of surprise and... something else on his face. He shakes his head slightly, a small smile playing on his lips as he turns and walks away, heading to his own room and recalling the experience with every step. He tries to tell himself that it was just a polite gesture, nothing more, but he can't help the way his heart flutters at the thought of your lips on his skin. He knows any semblance of sleep won’t be easy- not after your stunt.
You sleep deeply through the night and into first light, unable to hear Alucard knocking at your door.
He knocks a second time, a tray of breakfast food in his hands.
Upon your lack of response, he enters the room quietly, his eyes immediately going to your bed to check on your condition- smiling softly as he sees you still asleep, setting the tray of food on a nearby table.
He walks over to the bed, his footsteps light and quiet so as not to wake you. It’s almost noon, and he wants to make sure you’re not feeling any sort of extreme exhaustion- considering the irregular surplus of sleep.
He continues to watch your face- finding himself getting used to the peaceful sight of your sleeping form.
But he notices a look of distress on your face, becoming concerned. He sits down on the edge of the bed, observing intently, his eyes narrowing as he realizes you're having a nightmare of some sort.
He hesitates for a moment, unsure if he should wake you up, but the conviction on your face convinces him to act.
"Hey...wake up." He gently shakes your shoulder, trying to rouse you from your terrors.
He watches as you rise up in a jerked motion- breathe quick and heavy, pupils dilated and expression that of terror.
He places a comforting hand on your back.
"Shh... it's okay. You're safe now. It was just a dream." He says as he rubs your back in soothing circles, his touch gentle and reassuring. He looks at you with concern, his eyes filled with worry
"You were having a nightmare... do you want to talk about it?"
“I don’t really remember it-“ You say in a defeated tone, more annoyed than anything.
"Okay. But if you do, I'm here to listen."
“Thank you”, you say with a faint smile, his hand now on your shoulder.
"Of course.“ He glances over at the tray of food he brought in.
"I brought you some breakfast. You should eat something. It’ll take your mind off it perhaps?”
You take the tray appreciatively, nodding but still disoriented.
He notices the slight change in your expression. He tilts his head slightly, studying your face.
"Are you sure you're okay? You look a bit... dazed."
“Sorry- i'm just- still waking up”
He chuckles softly, amused by your sleepy state “It's alright. I understand."
He sits on the edge of the bed again, watching you pick up the food, satisfied that you're finally eating something.
He leans back against the headboard of the bed, content to just sit with you for a while.
"How are your wounds feeling today? Are they healing well?"
“Oh- yes I think so”, you say, putting the tray next to you and turning to face him, lifting your shirt up to let him examine them.
He runs his fingers gently over the healing cuts under your bandages, making sure they're not infected or still bleeding
"Good. They look like they're healing nicely. You'll probably be fully healed in a few more days."
“A few more days...alright”. You start to think to yourself, wondering what'll happen then- considering that you’ll have no need to stay here once you’re healthy.
He notices the look on your face, the slight furrow in your brow as you think to yourself. He lowers your shirt, his gaze fixed on you
"Is something wrong?”, he asks, getting closer to you as he tries to coax it out of you.
You simply shake your head.
He raises an eyebrow, not quite believing you. At all actually.
"You know you can tell me if something is bothering you, right?"
“I know…” You say, unconvincingly once again.
He reaches out and gently takes your hand in his, his touch gentle and comforting
"You can trust me, you know. I won't judge you. I swear it.” He says with a gentle expression.
“Yeah- yeah I know.” You say quickly, your face developing a rouge at his sudden act of affection. Or maybe it was just- care, a polite gesture of friendship.
You go back to eating your breakfast, slipping your hand out of his.
Even while enjoying your morning meal, your stomach is heavy with the residual feelings of your nightmare- frustration that you can’t seem to remember what made you feel so ill.
“Do you ever get nightmares?” You ask Alucard.
He looks to face you- a bit unprepared for your question but honest.
“At times, they seem more like recollections than fantasies of my mind.”
You furrow your brows, looking done at your food and playing around with it.
“I can’t remember what I was even dreaming about- but it’s a strange feeling.”
You go on, opening up about the discomfort of your body.
He frowns, feeling a mix of sympathy and concern for you. He pulls you closer to him, his arms wrapping around you in a comforting embrace.
"I'm sorry. I wish I could take it away from you."
You let out a surprised sound- hands hesitating to wrap around him.
He can feel your surprise, unrelenting. He holds you tightly against his chest, one hand gently stroking your hair
"It's okay," he murmurs softly.
"You're safe now. I won't let anything happen to you. Alright?”
You feel your brows scrunch up and your body lighten- as if he’s shared some room in his body for you to lay your afflictions bare. To take some of the pain from you and lock it away in himself.
With contemplation- you hug him back.
He holds you closer, his chin resting on the top of your head
"That's it," he murmurs. "Just relax. Let me hold you."
His words soothe you like a balm, mending together pensive feelings of melancholy you weren’t even aware of before.
You feel warm tears roll down your cheeks, sniffling before he gently rocking you back and forth as he tries to soothe you
"Shhh, it's okay. Let it all out," he whispers, his voice filled with tenderness and compassion.
"I've got you," he continues.
You use every second to try and pull yourself up together- but he wraps around you close, holding you together as you fall apart in his arms.
He continues to whisper words of comfort, his voice low and soothing
"You're doing so well. Just keep breathing. In and out, that's it."
After a few minutes of much needed exhalations, you recover well in the vampires arms.
He feels a sense of relief wash over him as you relax against him. He gently tilts your chin up.
"Are you feeling better now?" he asks gently, his hand still stroking your hair.
You let out a cathartic sigh, nodding.
He cups your cheek in his hand, his thumb gently brushing away the tears from your face
"Good. I'm glad to hear that. You had me worried for a moment there."
“Sorry...I guess I just haven't had someone hug me a long time.”
He shakes his head, his hand still cupping your cheek.
"You have nothing to apologize for.
And don't ever apologize for needing comfort. Everyone needs a hug sometimes."
As you calm yourself more, Alucard decides to give you some space to recollect yourself, clearly needing it.
“I’ll give you some space. I’ll be in the library, if you need anything.” He reminds, before bidding you a goodbye after making sure you ate.
You take deep inhales and deeper exhales, your mind ringing with his voice guiding you through breathes.
The room becomes quiet and dark, you're left alone with your thoughts. The memory of Alucard's touch and his warm smile are all you can think about, and you can't help but wonder what he's doing right now- deciding it’s better to find out for yourself than wonder.
Alucard looks up as you enter the library.
He sets down the book he was reading and smiles softly.
"Feeling better?" he asks.
You smile and nod, walking closer.
"Come here," he says, patting the chair next to him. "You can keep me company."
You gladly take a seat, eyes roaming over the various books and sheets covering the desk- similar to yesterday’s spreads.
He notices how close your face is to his work. He closes the book, gently tapping your forehead with it.
"You're going to give yourself a headache if you keep reading like that," he teases, a playful glint in his eyes.
You pout and rub your forehead.
“Rude…” You say in a whisper.
You scoot closer to get a better look at the writing, your elbows folding on top of the table.
As you observe the scripts, Alucard is more concerned with how beautiful you look- even when you’re concentrated, and he can't help but feel a pang of longing in his chest- quickly pushes those feelings aside, not wanting to ruin the moment with his own desires.
“What’s wrong?” You ask, noticing the pause of his writing and his gaze.
He blinks, realizing he's been caught staring. He quickly looks away, clearing his throat awkwardly.
"Ah, nothing," he says, trying to play it off as nonchalantly as possible.
"Just lost in thought for a moment."
You nod, going back to watching him work, putting your head on his shoulder with the close proximity.
He freezes for a moment, completely caught off guard by your sudden closeness. He can feel the warmth of your body against his, and the scent of your hair filling his senses.
He takes a deep breath, trying to keep his composure, but it's becoming increasingly difficult.
You can’t help but chuckle at his reaction.
He can feel your laughter vibrating through him, and it's a pleasant sensation.
"What's so funny, human?" he asks, playfully.
“Nothing, you've just….been on that page for a while. You can’t read can you? Tell me the truth.” You play around sarcastically.
He glances back down at the book, realizing that he's been staring at the same page for several minutes now, obviously at that.
He lets out a soft chuckle, embarrassed that he got so distracted by your presence once again, finding it to a troublesome, reoccurring issue.
"Ah, I guess I am a bit distracted," he admits, his gaze flickering back to you.
“No no it’s okay, lots of people can’t read you know. Don’t be embarrassed”, you continue with your nonsense joke.
You pretend to look around, your eyes going around left and right as he shakes his head.
He shuts the book, setting it aside and turning his full attention to you as he pushes it away.
He turns his body towards you.
"You're a distraction," he teases, poking your side gently.
“Hey!” You exclaim, “you invited me to sit here”, you digress, poking him back.
He chuckles and dips his finger in a small pool of ink, swiping it on your nose, making you backup a bit and give him more room for defense.
You gasp at the sudden cool touch of pigment- and run after him as he walks over quickly to the books nearby.
“This is not fair at all!” You exclaim, watching him dodge your attacks with ease.
“That seems like a personal issue, yes?” He says as he walks deeper into what seems like a maze of shelves.
As you get more and more competitive- you finally land a hit on him: a decently sized dab of ink landing on his cheek.
As it lands you run off- not wanting another hit of solvent somewhere on your face.
But of course…to your disadvantage, you can’t necessarily outrun a vampire.
Easily, he catches up to you- pinning you against the bookshelf. He stands over you, his body caging you in, as he holds up his finger- ready to mark you with another proof of failure.
"No escape now," he teases, his hand slowly and tauntingly smearing ink around your chin.
You roll your eyes and chuckle- the both of you breathless from the chase.
He can feel your small breathes mingle with his- noticing your chest pressed up against his.
He looks down at you, his eyes locking onto yours, and suddenly the playful atmosphere shifts into something more intense.
He rubs your bottom lip- except you don’t feel anymore ink rubbing into you, just the touch of his skin, his eyes glued to your supple lips as you look at his gaze.
“Alucard…?” You whisper softly.
He doesn’t look at you, eyes still glued to your flushed cheeks and the staggered breathe that escapes from your mouth.
“Hm?” He responds, finally flickering his eyes up to look at you.
“Yes dear?”
As your eyes lock, you feel a force that only pushes you to an immeasurable distance into him- and he responds immediately.
As if endless moments of pining finally meet its destiny- the kiss is tentative at first, a slow exploration of each other's mouths.
He takes his time, wanting to savor every moment of this, wanting to make sure that you're comfortable and enjoying it too.
Your arms wrap around each there- Alucards large frame pressing you into the bookcases behind you as his hands hold your sides- your arms wrapping around his neck to pull him closer.
He groans softly at your hands on him, your tongue meeting his in a heated dance. He's surprised by how easily you fall into rhythm with him, how well your bodies seem to fit together.
He revels in the sounds you're making, the way your body trembles against his. He descends his kisses to your cheek and then neck- feeling your pulse racing under his lips. He continues to kiss and nip at your neck, his fangs scraping gently against your skin as he moves down to your collarbone- the feeling of his teeth grazing your skin absolutely electric.
Your fingers grip slightly at his hair, running through them as he lavishes your shoulder with his sweet kisses.
Your body starts to arch into his touch. His hands on your sides tighten, holding you in place- his breath heavy as he starts to speak between kisses.
“Stop me…please, please stop me if you don’t want this…Stop me, I won’t be able to stop myself.” He pleads, kissing up to your ear as his other hand snakes up to hold the side of your neck, pulling his face to look at you again, his aureate eyes piercing into yours.
You let out deep breathes from your nose, swallowing the lumps in your throat as your half lidded eyes meet his, nodding just enough to assure him before diving back into his lips.
He groans again at the feeling of your lips, his grip on your thighs tightening. He presses his hips against yours, letting you feel the evidence of his arousal.
He breaks the kiss, his lips trailing down your jawline and to your neck once more. He can't resist the urge to mark you, his teeth meeting kisses and sucks at the sensitive flesh.
“Alucard-“ You interrupt.
He growls against your neck, his teeth almost sinking into your skin just enough to leave a mark
"Yes, my dear?" he murmurs, his voice low and yearnful.
“You….can drink, if you want to.” You go on softly, seeing his eyes flicker with an immediate importance.
He lets out a shaky breath, his control hanging by a thread. He can feel his fangs lengthening, his body practically vibrating with need as he gulps.
"You shouldn’t say such things to a dhampir," he growls, his grip on your hips tightening almost painfully.
He leans in closer, his lips brushing against your pulse point once more.
He can feel your heart racing, the scent of your blood is enough for him to go mad- the sound of your blood that pumps through your veins sounding like the perfect symphony.
"Last chance to change your mind, y/n.” He murmurs, his breath hot against your skin.
You shake your head, holding his chin and tangling your fingers in his hair.
“I want to feel it…feel you.”
Your words cause his self-control to shatter. He can't hold back any longer, the need to taste your blood overpowering everything else, any sense of responsibility or moral compass gone- your declaration of want is all it takes.
He sinks his fangs into your neck, a deep moan rumbling in his chest as the taste of your blood hits his tongue. You feel the two long needles puncture your skin smoothly- the pain quickly subsiding as you feel his lips plant themselves on your skin and his breathe blows kisses over your skin over and over- his chest puffing out as he gets closer and more greedy.
You felt his hands clutching at your waist as if his fingerprints could weld onto your skin like iron.
The pain and pleasure mingled, creating a heady cocktail that clouded your senses.
The room spun around you, the world narrowing to the sensations of his fangs in your skin and the blood leaving you and nourishing him, his heart pounding in sync with your own.
You felt his hardened length, insistent, pressing against your thigh, a silent testament to the desire coursing through him while the taste of your blood intoxicates him- the taste like ambrosia, all while he can feel your body trembling against his, can hear the sounds of pleasure falling from your lips.
He can smell your arousal, the scent driving him wild with desire. He drinks deeply, his tongue lapping at the puncture wounds on your neck to encourage the flow of blood.
His grip on you almost bruising as he grinds against you-feeling himself losing control, his body acting on pure instinct as he takes what he needs from you, as if you were providing him with life force.
He finally pulls back, his fangs leaving your neck as he looks at you- your blood on his lips staining them as if he devoured a mound of cherries.
You smear the droplet across the corner of his lip- the red hue replacing what was once ink, pressing your lips onto his.
He moans into the kiss, his tongue tangling with
He carries you over to the nearest surface, which just so happens to be the desk you were just at. He sets you down on it, his body pressing against yours as he continues to kiss you hungrily and messily.
He chuckles against your lips, enjoying the way you groan as he pushes the books off the desk to make space for you. He lifts your hips slightly, grinding his hardness against you through the layers of fabric between you- growling in approval as you open your legs for him, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he presses himself against you even more.
He nips at your collarbone, his lips trailing down to your chest as he begins to unbutton your shirt with deft fingers.
“May I?” He asks before completing removing it at your confirmation.
He pushes your shirt off your shoulders, letting it fall to the floor and leaving you exposed to him
"Gods, you're perfect," he murmurs, his hands moving to cup your breasts as he leans down to capture one of your nipples in his mouth, your head tilting back as moans spills from your mouth- his tongue swirling around it before he gently nips at it with his teeth, the small remnants of your blood on his lips painting your chest in blotches.
His other hand moves to your other breast, his large hand almost completely covering it as he squeezes and kneads the soft flesh.
“Fuck-“ You groan, feeling his fingers tweaking at your sensitive buds while you feel him grinding even harder onto you his fingers trace patterns on your skin as he continues to worship your body.
Your fingers deftly unbutton his shirt, letting it fall open - his head perks back up to capture your lips once more.
Your hands trail down to his belt buckle.
He breaks the kiss, his lips moving to your ear as he whispers
"Eager, are we?"
“Can you blame me…?”
"No," he murmurs. "Because I want you to be. I want you desperate and needy for me…burn for me, like I burn for you.” He groans against your ear, his hands trailing up the sides of your thighs and gripping your hips to toy with the hem of your skirt.
“Stay still”, he whispers, his voice much more playful now. “Let me check the rest of these wounds? Yes?” He mentions, slowly letting the tie of your skirt undo itself as he slides it down, humming in approval as you lift your hips for him.
His cold hands touch your bare skin and you almost flinch, but you welcome them.
“Draga mea…you’re stunning.” He groans, looking down to appreciate your skin under the moonlight seeping from the overhand windows of the library.
You feel the light seeping into your skin and more noticeably his hands becoming more
bold, more desperate, and daring. So are his kisses, descending down your neck to the valley of your breast, worshipping your skin as he kneels down to get on both knees while his face is met with your core- your cunt throbbing loud enough that his ears are sure to pick up on it.
He parts your thighs further, his hands gripping them tightly as he continues to kiss and nip at the sensitive skin of your inner thighs.
He's close enough now that you can feel his hot breath on your aching core, but he's deliberately avoiding touching you where you need it most.
“Alucard…please-“
He looks back up at you, cutting you off before you can beg.
“Adrian. I need you to call me that now.” He says, placing a kiss on your core through the fabric.
“Okay?” He adds, waiting for you to nod before he slips the fabric off and finally darts his tongue out to tease the sensitive skin just above your clit, smirking into your folds when he heard your breathe hitch.
He moves his tongue down slightly, tracing around your clit.
He can see how wet you are, your arousal dripping down, tasting it.
He starts to lap at your clit, his tongue swirling around it in tight circles before dipping down to tease your entrance as your moans spill out, hand tangles in the his hair, gripping his golden strands and making him groan into you, eyes darting up to meet yours- lost in the taste and scent of you, completely consumed by the desire to make you feel good.
You feel your hands gripping tighter, the heavy cinch in your abdomen ready to snap.
Minutes that felt like hours of him reverently pleasing you- you tremble and gasp.
He doubles down his efforts, his tongue and lips working even harder to push you over the edge. He can tell you're close, your body trembling and your breath coming in short gasps
“Adrian- I’m-!” You whine, your legs loosening their clasps around his face as you cum on his tongue.
He groans loudly as you cum, his tongue eagerly lapping up every drop of your release. He doesn't stop, continuing to lick and suck at your sensitive flesh even as you ride out your orgasm.
He finally pulls back, his face wet with your juices as he looks up at you. “You’re so beautiful when you cum. I want to make you do it over, and over.” He said, rising up to his feet- resting his forehead against yours as he tries to catch his breath
"You have no idea what you do to me," he whispers, his voice filled with raw emotion, lips brushing on your ear.
“What do I do to you?” You reply, pulling your head back to look up at him.
He gazes back down at you, his heart clenching at the sight of your innocent eyes. His hand cups your face, fingers tracing your supple face.
“You make me want things I never thought I could have. Things I don’t deserve." He admits, almost like confessing a sin to you, leaning in to kiss you again, pressing his lips against yours in a tender caress.
“I almost want to keep you here. Just for myself- look at how selfish you’ve made me, draga mea”. He speaks, a smooth accent painting his last words as he pecks kisses to your jaw, chuckling deeply as he feels your hands unbuckling his belt and letting it fall.
Both of your hands frantically pull at eachother- the innocent chuckles and soft kisses between the seconds it takes for him to undress and spread you apart- ready to give you the attention you need.
He positions himself at your entrance, his cock throbbing with anticipation. He looks into your eyes, his expression filled with desire and possessiveness
"Are you ready for me, love?" he asks, his voice low and rough. "Are you ready to feel me inside you?"
“Yes- please, need more Adrian.” You plead.
He slowly pushes in, his hips moving in a slow, deliberate thrust.
He looks down at you, his eyes locked on your face as he watches your expression
"Relax for me, love," he murmurs, his hands stroking your thighs gently. "Let me in."
You nod, breathing in and out softly as he helps you and reassures you with soft words and gentle caresses.
“You’re doing so well, keep going for me. Breathe…Fuck- just like that.”
He can feel your body relaxing around him, allowing him to slide in further with each slow glide of his hips.
When he finally bottoms out, he feels your walls clenching down on him- making him bite down on his one lil til it bleeds.
The same blood hits your lips over and over on an tangle of kisses, his pace getting faster and more intense as he starts to lose himself inside you- his heart beating in sync with yours as he fucks you on the desk that starts to creak now.
“Fuck- it's so...” You groan, your stomach pooling with the same feeling just moments ago.
"So what, love?" he asks, his voice rough. "Tell me. Tell me how it feels. Tell me everything.”
You whine softly- felling each thrust hammer into you even deeper as he urges you to speak.
“So...fucking good...” You admit, wholeheartedly.
He shudders at your words, his cock twitching inside you. He nips at your ear, his breath hot against your skin
"My perfect little human," he groans, his hands roaming over your body- your walls tightening hearing him whisper to you.
"Oh, you like that, don't you?" he whispers again, his voice low and seductive. "Being told how perfect you are? Hm?”
You can’t reply even if you wanted to- and you most urgently did. Only whines and moans escape your lips.
He chuckles, his smirk widening as he sees the effect his words have on you
"You're such a good girl," he murmurs, his lips brushing against your neck. "So beautiful, so sweet. I wonder how many times I can make you cum tonight."
“So close- Adrian!”
He can feel your body trembling beneath him, your breathing ragged and uneven
“Come for me, darling” he whispers, his voice smooth and sickly sweetened. "I've got you. I'll take care of you."
You look up at him once more- your big pleading eyes grasping for a piece of his soul to gaze into.
Looking down at you again, his eyes meet yours. He's momentarily struck by the vulnerability and trust in your gaze, and it almost brings him to his knees completely.
"God, I love you," he whispers, his voice raw with emotion- almost as if he had no time to think before he spoke, as if it would change anything.
Your heart thumps, unable to tear your gaze away.
“A-Adrian-“ You moan out- his cock still pumping in and out of you and hitting every spot to make you cry out- ultimately making you spill all over him as you cum.
He lets out a shaky breathe feeling you release.
He’s never said those words out to anyone before, never dared to hope that he would ever feel this way at all.
He buries his face in your neck, his movements becoming more desperate as he clings to you, still going even as you’ve finished.
"Say it," he begs, his voice rough. "Please, say it. I need to hear it."
Your thighs twitch around his waist- overstimulated and sweaty, “love you…Adrian-! I love you…” You reply, clawing your nails at his back.
He groans into your neck, his own orgasm washing over him in a powerful wave.
"Oh, gods-" he gasps, his hips stuttering as he spills inside you. He holds you tightly, his body shaking, licking at the wounds he planted on your neck from earlier, wanting to taste the crimson of your being, just a little more.
As the blood draws, each drop hitting his senses, he knows he is binded tightly to a world he cannot live in without your presence. His Affliction.
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whimsic4alwasab1 ™ - do not copy, translate, modify, or claim any of my work as your own.
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trainer-from-unova · 2 months ago
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lab rats
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𖤐 english ao3 𖤐 spanish ao3 𖤐 masterlist 𖤐
ship: bob reynolds/afab!reader
summary: you and bob are imprisoned until you two have sex with each other. yup that's it.
a/n: first time writing about sex pollen and fuck or die vibes, also english isn't my first language AND I WROTE THIS BEFORE WATCHING THE MOVIE
cw: pre-canon, AU, human experimentation, lab sex, consensual sex, oral sex, piv sex, semi-public sex, sex pollen, drugged sex, noncon drug use, implied drug addiction
word count: 2'5k
When she entered the cold, empty, white room padded all over, pushed by the security staff the only thing she was wearing was a plaster on the part of her arm where a doctor had pricked her minutes before and handcuffs on her wrists in front of her. Luckily the position of her arms meant that she was able to cover her most intimate parts. She didn't understand why she had been handcuffed, undressed and taken there, but she wasn't the only one — there was also Bob, also pricked in the arm, naked and sitting with his back against the soft wall. He stood up as she turned to look at the people who had taken her there, but they closed the door before she could say or do anything, and she turned again, looking worriedly at her partner.
"What are we doing here?" She asked, unable to stop her eyes from scanning him up and down, reaching for her partner's crotch for a second as he slowly approached her, though keeping his distance so as not to make her uncomfortable. She didn't feel embarrassed, it was natural thing to do that if you have a naked man in front of you, and he couldn't help but do the same with her breasts either, which she understood and didn't mind. None of the pyjamas they usually wore did justice to them, but at the moment she was more focused on why they were locked in there.
"I don't know," he replied. More than confused or nervous, he looked defeated — tired of being an abused lab rat, locked in there.
"How long have you been here?" She asked glancing around the place: there were cameras in every corner of the ceiling and something resembling a fire extinguisher, and of course the lights.
What they didn't know was that it was expelling sex pollen to provoke them into having sex, so that she would become pregnant. They wanted to try their luck and see what would come out of mixing their blood — hopefully someone as powerful or even more powerful than their parents.
"Two minutes or so," he replied catching his partner's attention, making her look at him again. "Why are you handcuffed?" He looked down, staring at the handcuffs at her crotch.
"I don't know," she answered lowering her gaze to take a quick look at them.
Her nipples became hard, she assumed it was because it was cold — not just because she was naked, but because it was cold in there. She wanted to hug herself, not to cover her breasts but to keep herself warm, but because of the handcuffs it was impossible. The other one did under the envious gaze of his companion, and he couldn't help but feel bad about it. An idea crossed the man's mind, and he dared to offer it aloud for he meant no harm, and he believed she knew him well enough to know he meant no harm.
"Um... Do you want me to...?" he asked opening his arms, assuming correctly that she would understand what he intended.
She looked at him doubtfully for a second, but she knew it was the best, if not the only option to warm up, so she swallowed and accepted the proposal, nodding her head in silence and moving closer to him. She raised her arms, folding them and putting her hands around her own neck, on her shoulders. When she reached him she stood shyly, resting her forehead on his right shoulder, and he leaned over her, wrapping his arms shyly around her.
They both closed their eyes and sighed deeply. It felt good, not only to share their body heat but also because it had been so long since they had last hugged and been hugged. She wished she was untied so she could return the gesture by wrapping her arms around him as well, and honestly so did he, but he understood her situation.
For some reason unknown to her, her insides ached — it was as if they were crying out to be filled, and that was the only way for the pain to pass. And for better or worse, something similar happened to Bob — the physical contact made his body too excited, and probably not helped by the sex pollen or the energetic drugs he had been injected with minutes before being locked in there. She noticed this, opening her eyes and looking down as she took a step back to look at the erect member pointing at her. He did the same, distressed and blushing.
"I'm sorry," he apologised nervously in case he had made her uncomfortable, "I don't know why, I can't help it. I'm really sorry," he said looking down in embarrassment.
"It's alright, I understand," she laughed softly, "I mean, I feel the same..." she whispered biting her lip, looking him up and down. When he looked up, confused and surprised by the information his partner had confessed, he was even more surprised to see the way she was looking at him. Now she was the one who was sorry, and her cheeks blushed as well. "I'm sorry," she said embarrassed, holding her hands to the top of her head as she turned and took a few steps around the room, "I don't know what's wrong with me," she said as he looked down at her buttocks. He was embarrassed again, he didn't know what was wrong with him — he wasn't normally like that and at that moment he looked like an animal in heat.
"Aw, how cute," suddenly said a sarcastic female voice, already quite familiar to both of them locked in there. She wasn't there, it was coming from the ceiling, probably from what looked like the fire extinguisher or the cameras. "You make a good pair."
"You!" she said angrily, looking up at the cameras on the ceiling as she lowered her hands. "What are we doing here?"
"We need to study all your side effects and how they affect every aspect of your body," said Valentina, and she wasn't partly lying — she was just omitting information, "so get comfortable and do what you want to do, you won't come out until you do it. Several times," she quickly added. It was part of the plan, and if she didn't get pregnant that day they would try another time until she did.
She looked down, her eyes wide as she took in the information she had just received. He was the same, only looking at her. When she turned around their eyes connected, but they quickly averted them out of embarrassment; not that they didn't want to do it, but they didn't want to be watched or recorded, and above all they didn't want to be forced or make the other feel awkward and uncomfortable.
"...What do we do?" he asked daring to look at her again.
"I suppose we have to do what we are asked to do," she said doing the same, confused and shrugging her shoulders.
"Do you want to?" he asked, now even more confused than she was.
"Do we have a choice?" She asked, now she was the defeated one. "Not the best conditions, clearly, but... Anyway, I think we're both in the mood," she said raising her arms to point to her erection, "so..." she said as she shrugged her shoulders again, slowly moving closer to him. "Good thing you're already erect, because I can't do much with my hands," she said putting her arms around her torso, reminding him that she was handcuffed and deciding to take the situation with humour, which was her best defence mechanism. "I guess they put them on me in case I resisted..." she whispered, rather to herself.
"God," he said, horrified at the idea. "This is ridiculous."
"Yeah, well..." she sighed deeply, looking down at the floor. "Shall we begin?" She looked up into his face, then looked down at the member pointing at her. "The sooner the better, the sooner we get out of here."
"Um... It's been a long time since..." he said embarrassed as he watched her move closer to him, getting dangerously close.
"Don't worry, neither have I," she said averting her gaze to his lips, correctly assuming that the best way to break the ice between them was with a kiss.
Aware of where she was looking and what was likely to happen in a few seconds he hesitantly placed his hands on her waist, noticing how she stood on her tiptoes to move closer to him. He looked down at her lips as well, and slowly and shyly moved closer to them until they merged.
The kiss began as such; slowly and shyly, but as they did, it quickly grew hotter. Unconsciously she moaned and brought her hands to his shoulders, almost to his neck because of the handcuffs while he brought one of his hands to one of her cheeks, and with the other he pulled her closer to him. Before they parted for lack of air, she bit his lower lip.
"The pyjamas don't do you justice," she said as she slid her hands down his muscular chest, smiling playfully as she watched him.
"What did you expect?" he asked with genuine curiosity.
"You said you were a drug addict so I assumed you were anorexic," she said as she bent down and drove one knee into the soft ground, "but I see you're in shape," she said driving the other, now with both knees driven into the ground and giving him a quick glance at his member before looking up and back at him with a playful grin. He did the same and lay back on the floor as she wet her lips with the tip of her tongue.
With each passing second the drugs and pollen were having more effect, and they no longer cared about being watched or anything else, they just wanted to satisfy themselves once and for all, following their most primal instincts. Probably later, when the effects wore off, they would regret it and feel more ashamed.
With the tip of her tongue she brushed from the lowest to the highest, sending a shiver down the young man's spine. When she reached the tip she sucked it like a lollipop, causing the young man to stifle a moan at such pleasure and bring his hands to his partner's head, grabbing her hair and pulling her head down wanting to feel more. At times she couldn't help but moan, and she noticed her own crotch getting even wetter, albeit in a different, more natural method than the one she was using.
When she got tired, which was often due to lack of practice, she would separate and he would massage it with his hand. Before reinserting it she dropped saliva which she collected in hee mouth to moisten it, to make her lips slide better. He clenched tighter as his breathing hitched. Out of curiosity while listening to him she looked up to see what state he was in, and saw that he was with his head up, staring at her.
"Oh, so you like to stare," she said with her mouth free, swallowing saliva and trying to wipe the corners of her lips with her hands as he leaned his head back against the floor. Tired of using her mouth so much and wanting to feel more, wanting to feel him again from the inside but in another part of her body, she lifted herself up and climbed over him, sitting on his crotch — literally on his cock, but not inserting it.
"I'm sorry," he apologized, blushing as she rested her hands on his belly and began to rub herself against him, eliciting sighs from both of them. "Can I touch your tits...?"
"You don't even have to ask," she replied laughing at how shy and afraid he was at the thought of making her uncomfortable. She had to admit she found him adorable, and very attractive too.
He brought his hands to her breasts and massaged them until she lifted her hips a little, and assuming correctly what she intended to do but was prevented from doing by the handcuffs, he helped her by grabbing his member so they could merge once and for all as they most desired.
She brushed her entrance with his tip wet with his pre-seminal fluid and her own saliva, and she bucked her hips carefully to press the tip against her entrance, slowly entering. It felt so good, neither could help but moan in pleasure. As she settled in and became accustomed to his presence fully inside her she brought her hands back to his belly and began to ride him, feeling his hands on her hips, very close to her buttocks. He closed his eyes and then she slid down on top of him, bringing their torsos together again and resting her hands under his neck. She was so wet that sometimes they couldn't help but separate by accident, but when they came together again they merged with need.
To her surprise, he wrapped his arms around her back and rolled her over, changing positions — now she was lying down and he was on top. She wasn't doing badly, but he could go much faster and be more effective in that position. He put his arms at her sides and she wrapped her legs around his back. His hips crashed against hers quickly and hard, making her moan more as they heard his hips crash against her buttocks, and most of all, the wetness inside her.
He had his head to one side, and he listened to her moans and gasps in his ear as he tried not to cum inside her, but it was very difficult; it felt too good to feel how hot and wet she was, and bringing him even closer to his own orgasm. She was the same way, beginning to feel a warmth inside her belly and down to her crotch while moaning loudly and endlessly as she spasmed, uncontrolled movements that caused her to pull her legs away from his back and arch her back and fingers. That was the straw that broke the camel's back, causing him to quickly spurt out of her and cum on her belly. Then, as he sighed, he lay exhausted beside her as they caught their breath and remembered they were being watched by the cameras on every corner.
"Sorry... for cumming in you," he said with bated breath and embarrassed, looking up at the ceiling.
"Don't worry, better out than in," she replied laughing tiredly, her breath also hitching and embarrassed, staring at the ceiling.
"Did you like it?" he asked turning his neck to his right to look at her.
"Of course," she said turning her neck to her left, still smiling, "isn't it obvious?" He blushed and looked away quickly.
"Me too," he whispered, and she thought that if she hadn't been handcuffed she would have held his hand.
"Um... Can I... cuddle with you...?" she asked, now shy.
"Oh of course, sure!" he hastened to confirm while turning on his side, wanting to make her feel good with the aftercare and warm her up again.
"Thank you," she whispered, leaning closer to him.
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y2kstarr · 3 months ago
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keep quiet - c. sturniolo
࣪˖ ִ⭑ ࣪ warning : choking, smut with absolutely zero plot
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"Oh fuck-"
The bed creaked beneath the both of you, the headboard muffled at least by a pillow put behind it, thankfully, your idea, all whilst Chris plowed into your sweet cunt, not surprisingly, his idea.
Your legs were wrapped around his waist, dangling off his hips as each thrust caused them to bounce just a bit, your toes curling at each glorious angle he took at your core, his cock sliding in and out of your sopping, messy hole, making filthy noises mix with your muffled moans.
"Shhh baby, I know you love this cock, but you gotta keep it down.." He cooed teasingly as he looked down at you, his brunet curls hanging down near his eyes as he did, his eyes full of hunger and his mouth turned up in a grin, as if it was fun for him to be fucking his girlfriend just a few doors down from where his brothers were.
Yeah, you guys would never live it down if Nick and Matt heard... but you just couldn't help yourselves.
You two had been trying to watch a movie together in his room, not wanting to interrupt Nick with his show in the living room, but of course, it's never just a movie with you two. Hey, keyword; Trying. Well, needless to say, glances at one another whilst cuddled up together lead to wandering hands, then lips, then shared breaths and moving bodies, and soon, Chris was stifling a groan whilst slipping into your tight heat.
"Chrisss.." You whined behind your own hand, panting harshly against it as your teeth dug into your palm, trying your damn hardest to keep quiet, but it just felt so fucking good.
"It feel that good ma?" He teased in a whispered tone, slowing down his thrusts just a bit to roll his hips just right to make you go crazy, a stifled groan leaving him at how you clenched around him out of pleasure. "Jesus- fuck- this pussy's fuckin' amazing, baby-" He panted, giving a slow, deep thrust that had both of you nearly rolling your eyes back.
He started picking back up, his thrusts quickening once more as the two of you rocked the bed, the pleasure twisting your stomach in delicious ways, fire burning deep within you as your nails dragged lines down his back, pulling a groaned whine from his lips.
"Chris- Fuck- Mm!" You whined, your noises getting louder than they should've, your hand slipping from covering your mouth in the heat of the pleasurable moment, getting lost in your foggy, fuzzy mind with each thrust he gave. "Don't- Don't stop- Please, Chris- Oh God-"
Suddenly, your words were cut off, your eyes widening as you felt pressure around your throat, realizing that Chris held his hand around it, looking down at you with dark, lustful eyes. A gasp left your kiss-swollen lips in an attempt to speak, but that was it, nothing but whines and gasps of what was meant to be your voice.
"I told you to be quiet, ma," Chris panted, a strangled groan leaving his throat at how fucked out you looked, your pretty eyes looking up at him like a needy puppy, parted lips nearly glistening with drool, edges of your hair sticking to your forehead from the sweat.
"Guess I gotta take it into my own hands, too drunk on my cock to understand, right?" He teased, a choked whimper leaving you as the only form of an answer you could give, making him breathlessly chuckle. "Yeah, 'm fuckin' right, baby."
The tips of his fingers pressed just right against the sides of your neck, making you take in a sharp breath that hardly went through. Fuzz rimmed your eyes as your mouth fell open, gasped noises coming out that were meant to be words, only choked out moans mixing in with the creak of the bed.
Time and reason molded together, your eyes blurring in vision as one of your hands gripped his forearm, your nails digging into his skin as you felt that knot in your stomach pull tighter and tighter, gasped noises leaving your lips as Chris pressed his forehead to yours, his pants and words starting to muffle in your ears.
"That's it, mama, come on this dick," He panted, his voice a near whine as his hips jerked a bit sporadically, so close to reaching his peak too from just looking at you, his other hand gripping the sheets so hard, his knuckles turned white. "C'mon baby, c'mon-"
Snap.
You felt your vision go practically white as your body shook, eyes rolling back as your back arched from the bed, spasming around Chris's cock as you felt your orgasm practically wash over you in tidal waves. You hardly even realized he'd let go of your throat as you were slack-jawed in a silent scream, noises finally leaving your mouth as you gasped for air.
"Oh God!-" Your hand slapped over your mouth in a weak attempt to hide the words, feeling as Chris's hips stuttered before he released spurts of thick, warm cum inside you, coating your walls as he fucked his seed into you, your head thrown back in pure bliss.
"Shit shit shit- Fuuuuck-" He panted, his lips against the column of your throat as his hips gave a few more reluctant thrusts, before he huffed out a breath and finally stopped, his body practically shaking as he panted with you, your hand finally falling from your mouth.
"Holy... shit.." He breathlessly said between pants against your neck, the two of you a sweaty, tangled mess of limps now as you both came down from your highs.
Your senses returned to you slowly as you breathed, vision and hearing coming back, though you missed that pressure around your throat without Chris's hand there anymore. Fuck, you guys had to do that more...
As Chris moved his lips up to your cheek, you could feel his grin against your skin before he even chuckled, a raspy little breathless "what..?" leaving your lips.
"You're droolin', ma." He cheesed against your cheek, pressing little pecs there in between chuckles as you tried to turn your head away and weakly shoved at his shoulder, your voice still breathy as you scolded him with a smile and rosy cheeks.
"Shut up"
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a/n: first time posting a writing, hope you guys like it :3 inbox is open for requests.ᐟ
dividers → @cafekitsune
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maskedbyghost · 8 months ago
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jealous!Simon is on my mind 24/7
even better if the two of you are secretly fucking bc he is scared of feelings, commitment, relationships, and blah blah blah…
and simon wasn’t used to feeling jealous. he had trained his emotions out of him long ago, or so he thought. but as he stood in the doorway, watching you stroll across the shared kitchen on the base, your back turned to him, the name "mactavish" boldly displayed on the long-sleeved shirt you wore, something twisted in his chest.
the sight of you wearing his shirt, so casually, stung in a way simon hadn’t expected. he cleared his throat, trying to sound indifferent, but the edge in his voice betrayed him. "that’s johnny’s shirt."
"i know." was the only thing you said, smirking since he couldn't see your face. you knew exactly what you were doing, but in that moment, you didn’t care.
"why is johnny's shirt on you?" simon asked, his voice low but tight with tension. he tried to keep his tone neutral, but the undercurrent of jealousy and frustration was hard to hide. seeing you in johnny’s shirt stirred something uncomfortable deep inside him, a mix of possessiveness and insecurity that he wasn't used to feeling. he hated how something so simple made his chest tighten, how the sight of you in someone else’s name made him feel like he was losing control of the one thing he was afraid to admit he cared about.
"oh, he gave it to me because i was cold," you said, pouting slightly as you turned around to face the only man you ever wanted "he is such a nice guy."
simon managed a slight nod, his mind blanking from the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside him. everything felt too much, too fast. meanwhile, you casually turned your back to him again, giving him another clear view of soap's name stretched across your shoulders as you began making your tea. the tiny grumble that escaped simon’s lips didn’t go unnoticed—it sent a wave of satisfaction through you, a small victory that made your day. you loved torturing him. and, after all, he did deserved it.
frustrated, he walked over to the sink, grabbing a glass of water, hoping it would cool the fire raging inside. but as he turned, his grip slipped, and the water splashed across your front. simon froze, watching the water drip down your shirt, half-shocked and half-relieved for the excuse to make the shirt disappear.
simon froze, his eyes glued to the water dripping down your shirt. after a beat of silence, he muttered, "well, guess you’ll need to take that off now. what a shame."
shocked, you watched as he put the glass down and left the room, still feeling the cold water seeping through the fabric. did he seriously just accidentally splash you and then walk out like nothing happened? that bitch.
*
later, as you slept in your bed, wearing your shirt this time, you stirred slightly at the feeling of someone’s arms wrapping around you. you didn’t even need to open your eyes or turn around—you already knew who it was. that familiar warmth could only belong to simon.
"simon?" you muttered groggily, barely able to make out the shape of him in the dim light. "what are you doing here?"
"shh, just sleep, pretty girl," he whispered softly, his breath warm against your ear. "i just wanted to apologize for how i acted earlier."
"i'm listening," you murmured, your voice barely more than a whisper.
simon’s arms tightened around you as he spoke. “i’m sorry for earlier. i know i’ve been pushin' you away and acting like an idiot. seein' you in johnny’s shirt... it just brought out this jealousy i didn’t want to admit i had. i hate feelin' like i’m not enough, or that someone else might have a piece of you. the truth is, i want you to be only mine. i can’t stand the thought of you being with anyone else. i just wanted you to know that, even if i messed everythin' up.”
“well, isn’t this a surprise? i didn’t realize it took me wearing johnny's shirt for you to admit your feelings.” you said with a hint of a smile, turning around to kiss him softly. simon sighed into the kiss, his arms wrapping around you with a sense of relief and affection.
simon pulled back slightly, his eyes intense as he rested his forehead on yours “i mean it, you know. you’re mine—only mine. no one else gets to touch what’s mine.” his voice was firm, yet tender, which made his words more meaningful.
"did you have a similar conversation with soap?" you asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.
simon grinned, leaning in even closer. “yep, told him to keep his wardrobe to himself unless he wanted a 'property of simon' label slapped on everything he owns.” he sealed his words with a gentle, lingering kiss, his lips tenderly brushing against yours as if to mark his claim in the most intimate way.
*
soap: so, i guess it worked?
y/n: your shirt got wet, but i got what i wanted. thanks, bestie.  
soap: i think i got worse treatment from simon than the shirt did, but anything for my two lovebirds.
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kaiser1ns · 3 months ago
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#. A KISS TO PROVE IT
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featuring 𝗶𝘁𝗼𝘀𝗵𝗶 𝘀𝗮𝗲 𝘅 𝗳𝗲𝗺!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿
fluff + slight suggestive. for him kissing wasn't special, but his actions told you otherwise.
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You are thirteen. A teenager—well, at least at the start of teenage life. Watching movies where the main characters share their first kiss has become fascinating. What’s so special about kissing, anyway? Do you just walk up to a random boy and kiss him, or do you tell the friend sitting next to you that you want to try it?
"Sae, do you know anything about kissing?" you ask, glancing at him as he remains glued to the TV, watching yet another football game.
"Huh? You mean that disgusting thing adults do when they love each other?"
Love each other? The thought rolls around your mind. Do you really have to love someone to kiss them?
“Well, I think it’s romantic,” you counter.
He finally looks at you, leaning slightly closer. “What’s so romantic about swapping germs with someone else?”
Typical boy—he doesn’t get it.
But what if? What if you kissed someone you really, really liked? What if he was the boy sitting next to you, holding your hand like he is now, his curious gaze waiting for an answer? Would it still be disgusting? Or would it be... something else?
“When a boy and a girl fall in love, they do more than just hold hands or visit each other’s houses,” you murmur, your cheeks heating under his stare.
At your words, Sae lets go of your hand, and you suddenly wish you hadn’t said anything, but then he speaks.
"Do you want to try?” he asks but you don’t answer. You can’t. Your heart is pounding, but he leans in before and... It’s quick, awkward, and ends almost before it begins—a brush of lips that leaves your mind with questions.
“That’s it?” he asks, skeptic and unimpressed by the mere act of kissing. You’re stunned silent, your lips tingling. But Sae, who is never satisfied, leans in again. “Let me prove it—kissing is gross.”
This time, it’s slower, more deliberate, and definitely less awkward. It’s warm, it’s strange, and you can’t help but think he’s wrong. It’s not gross at all. This time, the kiss lingers, as if he’s trying to understand why you find it so fascinating. The world seems to fade away for a moment, until—
The front door slams open.
“I’m home!” a familiar voice echoes through the house, followed by hurried footsteps. Sae pulls back instantly, his expression blank as if nothing happened.
Rin appears in the doorway, stopping dead in his tracks. He blinks at the two of you, then points at you and Sae accusingly. “Why is Nii-chan eating her face?”
You want the ground to swallow you whole.
Sae groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Rin, stop saying stupid things.”
As Rin bounds away, laughing, you sit frozen, your cheeks on fire. Sae exhales, leaning back on the couch like it never happened. “See? Disgusting,” he mutters, though his tone sounds less sure now but he still reached out to hold your hand.
Some things, it seems, are better left in theory.
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When Sae left for Spain, it felt like your heart had been ripped out. The boy you’d spent so many afternoons with, arguing, laughing, and most importantly sharing your first kiss, was gone. And the distance between you, one thing remained certain: Sae was your first love, and you fully intended for him to be your last.
Now you are seventeen, in a cozy hotel room, sitting on the plush couch, it feels like no time has passed. He’s here again, leaning into you, and the world-famous athlete—Itoshi Sae the pride of Japan, playing for Re Al is nowhere to be seen.
To you, he’s just Sae. The same annoying, sarcastic boy who always got under your skin, except now.
His lips are on yours, firm and demanding, as if making up for lost time. His hands find their way to your waist, pulling you closer, and you don’t resist. How could you, when you’ve been missing him just as much?
His mouth trails down your jawline, his breath hot against your skin, and you let out a soft sigh, tangling your fingers in his hair. “You’ve been gone too long,” you whisper, between kisses. Sae pauses just long enough to smirk against your lips. “Not my fault you’re terrible at long-distance relationships.”
You roll your eyes, but the playful retort dies on your tongue as his lips find yours again, hungrier this time. He’s missed you—he doesn’t need to say it; it’s in the way he kisses you, the way he is finally claiming his most important prize.
“Still gross?” you tease, pulling back just enough to meet his gaze.
His eyes lock onto yours, and for a moment, his expression softens. “Very gross,” he says, before pulling you back into another kiss, as if trying to prove his point all over again.
You melt into him, your heart pounding as your hands clutch his shirt, desperate to close the space between you. It’s overwhelming, messy, and intense, but neither of you care.
Right now Sae isn’t Japan’s treasure. He’s yours.
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©2024 kaiser1ns do not copy, repost or modify my work.
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sourcherryandsprinkles · 11 months ago
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I have a request for Jacaerys Velaryon x reader. They have been married for some time, but Jace still had feelings for Baela. He has never cheated and was always respectful towards reader, though. Jacaerys and her performed their duties and eventually she got pregnant. The fact that reader is now carrying his child makes them grow closer and Jace starts to fall in love with his wife.
For this one, the legitimacy of Rhaenyra’s children was called into question and there was no betrothals between Rhaenyra’s boys and Daemon’s twins.
Warnings: pregnancy (I don't like pregnancies when I read/write, but this one was okay and mostly a small part of the story)
my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time
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When King Viserys fell, a prince showed up to your home and asked your mother, Jeyne Arryn, for her support to Princess — now Queen — Rhaenyra’s claim. In her message, Rhaenyra didn’t fail to mention her mother, Aemma of House Arryn, and remind Lady Jeyne that she shared Arryn blood through her. Your mother was hesitant, knowing her support would make Daemon Targaryen king consort, but she couldn’t give her support to the Greens. So, she agreed but demanded to get something in exchange: a husband for her only daughter.
You didn’t like the idea of being sold for politics, but according to your mother it was part of being a woman. 
Married life wasn’t bad like you thought. Jacaerys was a respectful and kind man, but there was one problem: he had feelings for another. 
You didn’t take long to notice that his heart was elsewhere. It was written in the silence. The way he looked at Baela, the way he smiled at her — a special smile he kept just for her. He had undeniable feelings for her. You begged for attention, time, acknowledgment, but Jacaerys was never fully with you. Him and Baela spent a lot of time together riding their dragons together or practicing High Valyrian in the great hall, which left you hurt and jealous. Other than the red gem on your finger that matched the one of his cloak-pin, you had nothing in common. 
Sitting in your chamber, you held a necklace of your house’s sigil. The gold was cool against your skin, a stark contrast to the warmth of the fire crackling in the hearth. You hadn't seen your mother since the beginning of the war and you missed her dearly. You exchanged messages by raven, but it wasn’t the same as seeing her in person. 
A tear slipped down your cheek, wishing for this war to be over soon. 
The door of your chambers creaked open, snapping you out of your sorrowful reverie. You glanced over your shoulder and saw Jacaerys in his armor after a day spent teaching the dragonseeds. It was a smart idea to get more dragons and riders on their side, but also a lot of work. 
‘’What are you doing?’’ he asked, his voice a mix of concern and curiosity.  
‘’Missing home, that’s all,’’ you replied, quickly wiping the tear away and forcing a smile. The weight of the necklace seemed heavier than ever as you clutched it in your hand.
Jacaerys stepped further into the room, running a hand through his tousled hair. He crossed the space between you in a few strides, his expression softening. ‘’Don’t cry. I hate it when you cry.’’ He wiped your tear and sat next to you. ‘’I’ll take you to the Vale when it’s safe,’’ Jacaerys promised, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. ‘’I would take you now if it wasn’t so dangerous to fly over Kingsroad. The Greens have taken Harrenhal and—’’ 
‘’Is my mother okay? You promised you would send a dragon to watch over my home.’’  
He nodded. ‘’Rhaena left this morning with Joffrey and three dragon eggs. They should hatch soon and assure more protection to the Vale.’’ 
You let out a shaky breath, the news offering a small measure of relief. 
A few moons later, you announced to Jacaerys that you were pregnant. It was a surprise as you only had the occasion to lay together two times, but it’s been two moons since you last bled and the maester confirmed your suspicions. You were with child. 
The timing was not ideal, but the Queen was beyond happy for you and Jacaerys. She hosted a small feast in your honor, and made everyone keep your pregnancy a secret. Jacaerys was her heir, making your baby his heir. If the news got to their ears, she feared you would become a target for the Greens.
At the table, Baela congratulated you with a smile. You thought she would be bitter, but she was genuinely happy for you. 
As the weeks went by, the walls that once stood between you began to crumble and you and Jacaerys started getting closer. He would spend more time in the evening in your chambers, talking by the hearth while eating lemon tarts. And ask how the baby was although your stomach was barely round every time he returned from teaching the dragonseeds. 
You’ll never forget the look on his face when felt the baby move for the first time. The stars of complete amazement. He kissed you that night — a real kiss. 
On the seventh moon, as you were getting ready for your bath, you felt blood dripping down your leg.  Terrified, you asked one of the servants to fetch the maester and the Queen. She had other — more pressing — business to take care of, but you needed the reassurance of a mother by your side.
The news ran through the castle and made it way to Jacaerys, who dropped everything he was doing and ran through the corridors of Dragonstone to get to you. 
His face pale with worry when he bursted in your chamber, thinking you were going to lose the baby like his mother did. An early bleeding was how it started. 
‘’I’m fine, Jace. Maester Gerardys said bleeding can happen,’’ you said, taking his hand and pressing it over your belly. ‘’Our baby is fine.’’
House of the dragon taglist: @khaleesihavilliard @domoron @ididliquorice @lover-of-helios @lover-of-helios @shine101 @tanyaherondale@mikariell95 @serrendiipty @lantsovheiress @gilliananderfuckme @shine101 @tetgod @clayzayden@memeorydotcom @tnu-ree @futuregws @blackravena @winxschester @mysteriouslydelightfulchaos @xxlaynaxx @secretsthathauntus @pilarxxxaguayo @emmavan39 @stargaryenx @erylilly @bbblackmamba @rainedrop97 @dreamer087 @gothicgay14 @ashlatano7567 @superkittywonderland @justaproudslytherpuff @evesolstice @buckysmainhxe @padfootsvixen @scarletmeii @evesolstice @dkathl @kaywsworld @tetgod @padfootsvixen @domoron  @weird-addiction @angeliod @xjennyx2 @adaydreamaway08  @mymultiveres  @secretsthathauntus  @puffycreamcakes @thirsty4nonlivingmen @naty-1001 @katiepie67 @moshpot24x @hc-geralt-23 @lovelynerdytraveler @saturn-sas  @zgzgh @sssjuico10 @tabloidteen @timetoten @deekaag @wondxrgurl @aerangi @strmborns @astridyoo15 @daemonslittlebitch @queenbeestuffs @severewobblerlightdragon @agentstarkid @msliz @vane1999-blog @fairyfolkloresposts @todaywasafairytale07 @otomaniac @zgzgzh @thebeardedmoon @golden-library @kikyrizuki @hnslchw @camy85 @winxschester @armstrongscommentsection @withfireandbl00d @randomstory56 @JudgmentDays-Girl @darylandbethfanforever9 @darylandbethfanforever9 @aegonswife @dakotapaigelove @jays-bullshit
All and more taglist: @kenqki@hawkegfs@gillybear17@black-rose-29@fudge13@cece05@laylasbunbunny@gemofthenight@beautyb1ade@mellabella101 @vxnity713  @bisexualgirlsblog@queenofslytherin889 @thatbxtchesblog @softb-tterfly @ethanlandrycanbreakmyheart  @xyzstar  @graceberman3   @mikeyspinkcup @jackierose902109 @daisydark @laurasdrey @mischieftom @fanatic4niall @peterholland04 @idkwhattonamethisblogs  @lexasaurs634  @notasadgirlipromise @zoeynicolas @thejuleshypothesis @multi-fandom-bi-bitch @lexasaurs634  @notasadgirlipromise @thejuleshypothesis  @katherinejess  @rafesgirlstuff   @lafleshlumpeater @iamluminosity  @Anouknani-2305 @books0fever @papichulo120627 @qardasngan @ghostlyvoidydragon @M0rgans1nterlud3 @dahlia-blossom21
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illyrianbitch · 11 months ago
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Body Count
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Pairing: Reader x Azriel
Summary: Anxious about how your lack of experience compares to Azriel's, you ask him about his body count. Unfortunately for him, he misunderstands the question gravely.
based on this funny lil request!
Warnings: angst if you squint, miscommunication, silly az and silly cassian making fun of silly az, mentions of death/killing, a sweet lil kiss! fluff!
Word Count: 3.3k
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 
You’ve always had a soft spot for Azriel. 
It wasn’t just his mysterious aura and brooding looks that made him irresistibly attractive to you— though those definitely added to the appeal. Azriel was thoughtful. He was attentive. He seemed to understand you and your needs in a way that none of your other friends could. 
Your feelings for him had grown over time, blossoming into a full-blown crush.
And for the most part, it seemed like Azriel enjoyed your company too. 
There was a playful flirtation between you two, a spark that you hoped would ignite into something more. It had grown even hotter these past two months, through conversations that were held entirely too close to one another, stolen glances, and brief touches that sent shivers down your spine. 
But deep down in your stomach, there was something holding you back— a bitter, nauseating feeling. You weren’t just nervous, you were insecure. 
It wasn’t a secret that Azriel, Cassian, and Rhysand had their fair share of lovers. After all, they were all extremely attractive and had lived for centuries longer than you. But the idea of Azriel’s love life had begun to spin itself into an anxious, terrifying web in your mind. You weren’t experienced in such matters— at least, not nearly as experienced as Azriel must've been. The thought was daunting to you. Terrifying, really.
It was late at night now, and the last of your family had bid their goodnights, retreating to their respective rooms and homes. You found yourself alone with Azriel in the dimly lit living room, the small crackling fire mixing with the remnants of the celebration that lingered in the air— the heady scent of wine and the distinct smells of each of your loved ones. 
You stole a glance at Azriel, noticing the way his cheeks were slightly flushed, eyes bright with mirth. His shadows were calm, dancing playfully around his feet and his arms. He caught your gaze instantly, offering you a lopsided smile, the corners of his lips turning upwards in a way that made your heart flutter.
This was your chance— a perfect, quiet moment to confess something to him. To tell him how you felt. 
But the nauseating feeling in your stomach bubbled up once more. You bit the inside of your cheek. Perhaps it was the perfect moment indeed. Not to confess your feelings quite yet, but to get rid of the spider web of overthinking you’d created. 
Summoning up the courage, you leaned closer to him, the alcohol emboldening you. "Hey, Az," you began, your voice soft and hesitant.
Azriel turned to you. "Yeah?" 
You took a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest. "Can I ask you something?"
Azriel’s face seemed to soften. "Of course."
You held his gaze for a moment, taking in the hues of his eyes that seemed more golden in the firelight. A small blush rose to your cheeks and you swallowed nervously, your fingers fidgeting in your lap. 
"What is your body count?" 
Azriel blinked. His cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink as his mouth slightly parted, and you watched as his gaze seemed to dance around your face. He opened his mouth to respond, but a hiccup escaped him instead of words.
"I'm just... I was just wondering," you stammered, your cheeks burning hotter with heat. "If you're comfortable sharing, that is."
Azriel smiled at you, letting out another small hiccup as he repositioned himself to lean closer.  His shadows seemed to reach out towards you, a subtle, almost subconscious gesture of reassurance. "It's alright," he said, his voice gentle. "I don't mind sharing."
He took a moment to compose himself. “8,754.”
As if you’d been doused in icy water, your alcohol-induced haze dissipated instantly. 
"Oh," you breathed out, your eyes widening in shock. "Oh."
You would’ve tried harder to hide your shock, but the only thing you could focus on now was the large, heavy, number. It hit you like a ton of bricks, the weight of it settling heavily in the pit of your stomach. 
You expected a large number, sure. You told yourself that you could come to terms with it, learn how to be comfortable with the gap in your experiences. But you hadn’t prepared yourself for this large of a number, and suddenly you felt… uneasy. 
Azriel watched you closely, his expression quickly filling with concern. "Are you alright?" 
Azriel had been with over 8,754 people?
You nodded slowly. Unable to meet his gaze, you casted your eyes towards the carpet in front of him. "Yeah, I'm fine," you murmured, "I, uh, I think I need to go home. I must’ve drank too much."
Azriel seemed to sober up immediately. His shadows, which had been lazily swirling around his feet, suddenly grew still, sensing his shift in mood. He sat up straight, a look of worry crossing his features. "Here, let me walk you to your room," he offered, his wings slightly unfurling as if ready to rise.
You avoided his gaze once more, shaking your head quickly. "It's alright. I got it," you insisted, standing up a bit too quickly. You swayed slightly, and his wings twitched as if he wanted to reach out and steady you. You quickly regained your balance. "Goodnight, Az."
Azriel watched you go, shadows trailing after you slightly before retracting back to him. His wings sagged, a sense of helplessness washing over him as he watched your retreating form disappear down the hallway.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 
Azriel was tense. Every muscle in his body, every movement he made, it all felt constrained– stressed. Troubled. His shadows swirled restlessly around him, their hurried movements perfectly mirroring the deep agitation he felt in his gut.
Days had passed since his last proper conversation with you. He missed it— missed your presence, missed your laughter. He’d grown so used to your company, had begun to look forward to your conversations and the small flirty banter that he’d gained the confidence to indulge in. But you were distant now— awkward, even. And it was driving him mad. 
It was hot out, the afternoon sun blaring down on him and Cassian as the sound of clashing blades filled the air. Heavy sweat trickled down their faces, to a point where Azriel’s hair clung to his forehead like glue. 
But Azriel’s mind was anywhere but the training ring. And his brother quickly noticed.
"Alright," Cassian said, stepping back and lowering his weapon. "Either you're losing to stroke my ego, or something's going on."
Azriel grumbled, parrying another blow. "I'd never lose for your ego.” His wings twitched in annoyance. 
Cassian frowned, a scrutinizing gaze watching Azriel's movements closely. Something was definitely off. He tied his hair back up, securing it tightly. "Alright, spill it."
"No," Azriel replied curtly, his grip tightening on his weapon. His shadows seemed to wrap tighter around his form, as if trying to shield him from the conversation.
"No?" Cassian echoed, raising an eyebrow.
"I'm not going to talk about my feelings with you. We're not twelve.”
Cassian let out a small scoff, raising his hands in exasperation. "By the Cauldron, Az, just tell me why you've got a stick up your ass."
Azriel glared at him. A moment passed. And then he sighed, sheathing his weapon. 
"Y/N has been avoiding me, it seems."
Cassian frowned. "Are you sure?"
The question only brought a scowl to Azriel’s face, who threw Cassian a glare. 
"Yes, Cassian. I'm sure."
There was an itchy, prickling feeling of annoyance filtering through Azriels skin. His shadows flared out briefly before settling back into their usual orbit.
"Well, what did you do?"
Azriel’s shadows twisted tighter and his wings rustled uneasily.
"I didn't do anything.” 
Cassian gave him a skeptical look, crossing his arms. "Really?"
Azriel threw him another withering glare. But when Cass only responded with a raised eyebrow, Azriel’s shoulders sagged slightly. "At least, nothing that I'm aware of."
"Alright," Cass said, "Maybe you offended her somehow. What happened the last time things were normal? Can you remember?"
Azriel paused. He remembered quite clearly despite the drunken haze he had been in. He grimaced as the memory drifted into his mind, bright and clear as day. 
"She asked me for my body count.”
Cassian’s eyes widened. He stilled, leaning forward slightly. "And?"
"And I told her.”
There was a pensive look on Cassian’s face, a furrow forming between his brows as he processed Azriel's words. He narrowed his eyes at his brother. "What is your body count?" 
Exactly like that other night, Azriel replied without hesitation. "8,754.”
Cassian coughed, his eyes widening in disbelief. "I-I’m sorry?" he spluttered, caught off guard by the staggering number.
Azriel's confusion deepened, a frown marring his features. "You know this.”
"No," Cassian countered, shaking his head emphatically. “I do not know this.”
Azriel clenched his jaw, offering Cassian a cold unamused and irritated stare. “Yes, you do.”
"Apparently not.” Cassian let out a scoff. “Hell, I would’ve remembered if you slept with almost nine thousand people, Az. That's more than me."
Azriel’s face twisted into a scowl, a deep crease forming between his brows. His wings flared slightly. 
"Slept with? What the hell are you talking about?" 
Realization flickered in Cassian’s widened eyes, and suddenly, an understanding dawned on him. "Oh," he breathed out, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. He let out a hearty laugh. "Got all the skills in the world but that brain still fails ya, huh Az?" 
Azriel fought the urge to send a swift hit to his brother's jaw, if only to knock the amused grin off his face. 
"Can you be serious for one godsdamned minute?" Azriel snapped.
Cassian's laughter subsided, his expression sobering as he met Azriel's gaze— only slightly. The grin still persisted. "Body count doesn’t refer to your kill count," he explained, "It’s how many people you’ve fucked."
Azriel's face dropped and the color drained from his cheeks. From behind him, his wings fell limp. "You can’t be serious.”
"Deadly serious, brother.”
Azriel glanced to the ground, his mind racing through that moment with you. He thought back to your response, to that small “Oh” that haunted him, to the way your eyes widened. He’d simply assumed that you were disgusted by the amount of lives he’d taken, that you’d spent the night imagining how much blood was on his hands. For some reason, this new reality of what the question meant— it felt even more intimate. Oh gods.
"So does Y/n think that I..." he trailed off.
"That you've fucked almost nine thousand people?" Cassian finished for him, a subtle grimace painted on his features.
"But I haven't," Azriel protested.
"Well, you should probably be telling her that." 
Azriel didn't waste another moment. He turned on his heel, desperate to immediately find you and explain the very apparent miscommunication. 
"Wait!" Cassian called out. Azriel paused, turning around with an impatient glare. 
"Take a bath. You stink," Cassian said, wrinkling his nose for emphasis.
Azriel's glare deepened, and he flipped Cassian off before continuing his stride toward the exit.
Cassian's laughter boomed behind him, the sound trailing after Azriel as he walked away. "eight thousand seven hundred and fifty-four," Cassian muttered to himself, still chuckling in disbelief.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 
Azriel rushed down the hallway. Following Cassian’s unasked for advice, he was freshly bathed, hair still damp and clinging to his forehead. His shadows flitted nervously around his feet, his wings twitching restlessly at his back. 
He had no time to waste. Azriel really liked you. He needed to find you and clear up the misunderstanding before it began to fester into something deeper, something much harder to clean up. 
He found you in your room, catching you just as you were about to leave. “Y/n,” he said, as he came to a stop in your doorway. His voice was a bit louder than he intended.
You jumped, letting out a small scream as you spun to face him.  You caught his gaze as your hand flew to your heart. “Azriel,” you breathed out, a nervous smile playing on your lips as you steadied your breathing. “You scared me.”
He gave you a sheepish smile, his wings shifting slightly– a small, but clear sign of his embarrassment. “Sorry,” he said softly.
You let out a small laugh. “Hi, Az.” 
His smile grew. “Hi Y/n,” he responded, walking further into your room. “Are you heading out?”
You blinked in an attempt to break away from his gaze, casting a quick glance down towards your window. “Oh, yeah. I was just gonna go walk about Velaris, get some fresh air.”
Azriel hesitated for a moment before asking, “Would you like some company?”
You hesitated too, a part of you wanting to say yes. But then the infamous number came to mind, and the bitter, nauseating feeling returned. “Maybe another time?” you said, trying to sound as genuine as possible.
Azriel could tell you meant it, but the disappointment was clear in his eyes. “Alright,” he responded softly, his wings drooping slightly. “Enjoy your walk.”
A wave of sadness rolled through you at his response, at the way his shadows seemed to still at your rejection. Your eyes scanned his face, taking in his wet hair and the way his eyes seemed to plead with you. 
“I’ll see you later,” you said, offering him a small smile before making a move to side-step him. 
Before he could overthink it, Azriel reached out and gently grabbed your arm. The touch was soft, but it stopped you in your tracks. You turned back to him, finding yourself suddenly very close to him, faces only inches away.
His shadows wrapped around your wrist where he held you. A giddy flutter spread through you as his touch sent warmth racing through your veins. You melted into his grip, feeling a hunger for his closeness after just a few days without it. His gaze held yours, intense and searching, before flickering down to your lips. You took a deep breath.
“I’ve taken 8,754 lives,” Azriel finally spoke, his voice low and hesitant.
Your eyes widened in surprise. You took a step back, properly facing him now, trying to process his words. “What?”
Azriel looked sheepish, his eyes flickering with a mix of embarrassment and uncertainty. 
His shadows fluttered around him.
“The other night, you asked me what my body count was. I told you 8,754.”
You nodded slowly. “I remember.”
“I thought you were asking how many people I’d killed. Not—” he paused, a small blush reaching his cheeks. “Not how many people I’ve slept with.”
Your lips parted in an O of realization. You took in his face, observing how his shadows swirled tirelessly around him. Azriel offered you a small, unsure smile. A small laugh left your lips.
“Why would I be asking you how many people you’ve killed?” you finally asked. Your voice was soft with confusion and a hint of amusement. A small gleam grew in the shadowsinger’s eyes. 
“I don’t know,” Azriel responded honestly. “Why were you asking how many people I’ve slept with?” 
You blushed, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. “It’s silly.”
Azriel reached forward, gently grabbing your hand and pulling you closer to him. His shadows wrapped around your wrist where he held you. You fluttered at the sudden closeness, feeling a rush of warmth and nerves flow through your body. 
“It’s not,” he insisted softly, his eyes holding yours with unwavering sincerity.
“I just wanted to prepare myself. I haven’t… I’m not experienced in these types of things.” You paused, holding his gaze for a moment. And then the corners of your lips tugged into a smile. “But gods, it’s good to know I don’t have to compete with the experience of almost nine thousand previous lovers.”
Azriel’s expression softened, a fond smile tugging at his lips. “You never have to compete with anyone, Y/n. Especially not with me.”
A warmth settled in your chest. His thumb stroked your hand, a soothing rhythm that seemed to cause butterflies in your stomach with every touch. 
“Well, that’s good to know,” you replied softly, meeting his gaze.
“Yeah?” 
Azriel’s voice was soft now, a low cadence that made you feel like puddy in his hands. 
“Yeah,” you confirmed with a small smile.
The smile on his face grew further. You traced the movement with your eyes, taking in the small smile lines and dimples that formed. His smile dropped slightly as he frowned, brows furrowing slightly. 
“Wait.”
You tilted your head curiously. “Hmm?”
“It doesn’t bother you that I’ve killed 8,754 people?
 “I know you have your reasons.” You shrugged gently. “Also, I don’t have to compete with dead people.”
Azriel’s shoulders relaxed slightly at your words, as if a weight had been lifted off him. A chuckle left his mouth. It was warm and genuine, and the sound resonated deeply within you. “Just one of the many reasons why I like you.”
Your heart skipped a beat.
“You like me?
Azriel nodded, his gaze unwavering— something soft, almost sacred. “I do.”
A rush of warmth spread through you at his confession. You took a moment to let the words sink in. Your grin widened. “I knew it.”
Azriel shook his head, a smile of amusement tugging at the corners of his lips. “I wasn’t really trying to hide it.”
Your grin widened even more and you met his gaze with a playful glint in your eyes. His thumb continued its gentle rhythm on your hand.  “Do you feel the same way?” he asked. 
“I wasn’t really trying to hide it,” you admitted, mirroring his previous words with a soft smile.
Azriel’s expression seemed to soften further, his eyes reflecting a warm sense of longing. His eyes flickered from your eyes to your lips. 
Slowly, he leaned in, closing the distance between you. His hand cupped your cheek delicately, his touch sending a shiver down your body. You took a deep breath, feeling his scarred fingers run alongside your cheek. He met your eyes again, his gaze heavy, seeking something— permission. 
“Can I kiss you now?” 
Words eluded you for a moment as you met his gaze, your heart pounding in your chest. You simply nodded, breath catching in your throat as you whispered, “Please.”
For another fleeting moment, his hand cradled your face delicately, thumb brushing over your cheekbone with a tenderness that made your heart ache. And then he closed the remaining distance between you, his lips meeting yours in a kiss that was sweet and fervent.
It was shy at first— a hesitant, tentative meeting of lips that conveyed unspoken feelings that had never been fully addressed until now. You welcomed the warmth of his lips against yours, the sweetness of the moment overwhelming your senses. You pressed yourself further into his touch, fingers moving to tangle themselves in his hair as you pulled him closer. 
Azriel let out a sound of content as the kiss deepened, his shadows wrapping around you both like a protective embrace. You felt their cool, feather touch around your body, felt as lone tendrils weaved through your hair. 
When you finally pulled apart, breathless and smiling, Azriel rested his forehead against yours, eyes still closed as he savored the closeness between you. His fingers traced gentle patterns on your cheek. 
“I’m glad we cleared that up,” he murmured.
You let out a soft laugh. 
“Me too.”
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 
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orangeblossomsintheair · 4 months ago
Text
GRIEF ASIDE (1/4) | MV33
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summary : You fancied your fiancé, you realized with horror. Oh, God. You fancied your fiancé.
wc : 13k
an : this took.. a while ☹️ anyway
For as long as you could remember, you had been engaged to Max Emilian, scion of House Verstappen.
On paper, it was a triumphant match, a union to secure your house's fortunes for generations. To be betrothed to the son of a duke was a dream most could only aspire to.
Yet, no one envied House Button’s lovely heiress.
Instead, the court pitied you.
Jos Verstappen, your future father-in-law and Duke of the North, was a name steeped in infamy. Known as the Butcher of the North, his reputation was as frigid and cruel as the land he ruled. Whispers of his war crimes haunted corridors, and songs of lament cursed his name in taverns.
To marry into such a legacy meant tying yourself to shadows you could never escape.
But duty had bound you to this path as tightly as the chill of the northern wind now clung to your skin.
Raised to bridge alliances and strengthen bonds, you had no illusions about the weight of your role.
Now, you stood before the towering iron gates of the Verstappen estate, carriage behind you, your wool cloak and one of your knight’s heavy coats offered little respite from the North’s unforgiving cold.
“Keep your chin up, my lady,” Lily murmured beside you, adjusting the trunk she carried, her voice nearly drowned by the howling wind. Her cheeks were flushed from the frost, and her attempts at reassurance felt as thin as your cloak.
You nodded mutely, clenching your chattering teeth. Complaining about her poor preparation, or your shared underestimation of the northern winter, would achieve little.
The gates groaned open, revealing the sprawling estate beyond.
The fortress-like walls loomed high, their grey stone stark against the snow-laden landscape. Narrow windows glinted like ice shards under the weak winter sun.
Smoke curled lazily from the distant stables, a muted sign of life in an otherwise bleak expanse.
“Cheerful place,” Lando muttered behind you, his voice dry. He pulled his hood lower, trying to shield his face from the biting wind.
“More like a tomb,” Oscar replied, tone low. His eyes scanned the walls warily, hand resting on the hilt of his sword.
Crossing the threshold of the estate, you were greeted by a cavernous main hall that carried little more warmth than the outdoors. Though a fire crackled at one end, its heat barely touched the far corners of the room.
The scent of pine mingled with the cold tang of iron, likely from the spiked chandelier that loomed overhead, casting jagged shadows across the floor.
“Presenting Lady (Y/N) of House Button,” the steward announced, his voice echoing up the vaulted ceilings.
The words washed over you, irrelevant compared to your struggle to stop trembling. The knight closest to you, Oscar, shifted closer, his presence a silent bulwark, but you scarcely noticed.
A figure descended the grand staircase, drawing your attention despite the icy haze clouding your mind.
Max Emilian Verstappen.
He moved with a grace that could only be borne from years of court presence, strides measured and deliberate yet still managing to not look stiff.
Pale hair neatly combed, save for a few strands that fell across his forehead, softening the otherwise hard edges of his face. His broad shoulders were draped in a heavy black coat lined with fur, swallowing what little light the room offered.
You had heard tales of him: a skilled warrior, an even better horseman, and a temper so fierce people began claiming the Verstappen rage was a hereditary trait.
His eyes fell on you then, surprise flickering across his face before being quickly replaced by a furrowed brow and the unmistakable air of annoyance.
“Gods,” he muttered under his breath, his tone cold enough to make you flinch.
You stiffened, unsure whether to speak or remain silent.
Was that usually how the Northern Lords greeted their betrothed?
Max’s eyes roved over you, taking in your trembling form, pale cheeks, and the inadequate cloak clutched around your shoulders.
His frown deepened, and he turned sharply toward your knights, his expression hardening.
“Why in the seven hells is she dressed like this?” he demanded.
Sir Lando bristled but maintained his composure. “My lady insisted, Lord Verstappen, that we keep ourselves alive. We offered additional layers-”
“She’s half-frozen. Who cares if you're alive if your Lady is dead?” Max cut him off, already shrugging out of his own coat.
You opened your mouth to protest, to insist you were fine, but before you could utter a word, he was draping the fur-lined garment over your shoulders.
The residual warmth from his body enveloped you, burying you under the scent of pine and leather.
“Your stubbornness will kill you,” he muttered, crouching slightly to adjust the coat. His tone was still sharp, but his hands were steady and careful as they brushed over you.
You glanced at Lily, who hovered nearby, her eyes darting between you and Max. “Fetch tea,” Max ordered, voice brooking no argument.
She hesitated, clearly unsure whether to take orders from a person who was decidedly not her Lady, but a sharp look from him sent her scurrying away.
Max turned back to you, his expression unreadable as his hand brushed over your elbow, guiding you forward. “Sit,” he gestured to the high-backed chair closest to the hearth.
You sank into the seat gratefully, abandoning the appearance of grace in lieu of the warmth of the fire and the heavy coat easing the worst of your shivers.
Max crouched before you, his face illuminated by the flickering light. “You were standing in the cold far too long,” he said, softer now as though talking to an injured bird.
“I didn’t realize…” you started, but your voice faltered.
Max’s lips quirked in a faint, reluctant smile. “Not even when you were shivering like a leaf?”
He leaned back, regarding you for a moment before adding, “The North will swallow you whole.”
His words should have stung, but you found it hard to be insulted for there was no malice in them, only a hint of amusement.
The tea arrived swiftly, Lily handing it to you with a pinched expression, steam curling from the delicate porcelain as if reluctant to break the stillness of the hall.
You wrapped your frozen fingers around the cup, savoring the way the heat kissed your skin, thawing the numbness in your fingers.
Max walked to stand a few paces away, matching your knight and maid's distance, watching you with a detached sort of interest, his arms still crossed over his chest.
The flickering firelight carved sharp angles along his face, illuminating the high cut of his cheekbones and the stern set of his jaw.
“You look better now.” His voice was quieter this time. “At least you have some color in you.”
You weren’t sure if that was meant to be a kindness or merely an observation, but you offered a polite nod regardless.
“Thank you, my Lord.”
His eyes narrowed slightly. “Max will do.”
The correction startled you. Men of his station, sons of dukes especially, rarely made such allowances. Betrothed or not.
“As you wish… Max.”
A faint smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth, but it vanished just as quickly.
“I imagine you have questions.”
Of course, you did.
Too many, and yet none seemed appropriate to ask.
You had spent years preparing for this union in theory, but now that you were standing on the threshold of it, the rehearsed words died in your throat.
“Only a few,” you said carefully.
He hummed, a noncommittal sound. “Then ask.”
You hesitated. “Your father… the Duke… is he here?”
Max’s expression cooled.
“No. My father is at the border fortresses, inspecting the garrisons. He will return before the winter feast to welcome you.”
Relief and dread tangled in your chest. It was a reprieve not to face Duke Jos immediately, but you knew it was temporary at best.
“And your father will be joining us soon enough as well, won’t he?” Max’s tone was unreadable, though something sharp glinted beneath it.
You nodded. “Yes. My father will come north after his duties are finished. To meet with the Duke and… formalize the engagement.”
The words felt heavy on your tongue. This visit wasn’t just a quiet retreat to adjust to your future home. It was a public commitment. Before long, the entire North would know you belonged to him.
You dreaded what that would do to your public image.
Max’s jaw tightened although his expression remained carefully distant. “Of course.”
He turned slightly, gaze sweeping the cold stone hall.
“You’ll find the North is not like the South. Comfort is scarce, and the people scarcer. They will not warm to you easily.”
His words felt more like a warning than a courtesy.
“I don’t expect them to.”
That seemed to surprise him. Perhaps he had been expecting you to be one of those Southern ladies that demanded everyone to bend over backwards for their comfort.
His eyes flicked back to you, studying you in a way that made you want to shrink under his coat.
“Good.”
The fire cracked loudly, sending a shower of sparks upward. Max tilted his head toward it, the flicker of light catching in his pale hair.
“You’ll need to adjust quickly. My father won’t tolerate weakness in his house.”
“And you?” The question slipped out before you could stop it.
Max’s expression didn’t change, but something in his eyes hardened.
“I won’t coddle you, if that’s what you’re asking.”
It wasn’t. But the way he said it made your stomach twist.
Still, you straightened your spine. “I wouldn’t ask for that.”
A tense silence settled again, though this time, it felt more contemplative than cold.
Max’s gaze drifted from you to the door behind you.
“You must be tired from the journey. I’ll have your rooms prepared.”
“I thought we would stay in the west wing,” you said, recalling the arrangements made in the letters exchanged between your families.
Max’s lips pressed into a thin line.
“The west wing is being repaired. Storm damage. You’ll stay closer to the main hall until it’s finished.”
It was a small thing, perhaps, yet it unsettled you.
The west wing was meant to be yours. A space to adjust quietly, away from the imposing grandeur of the estate.
Now, you were being denied that distance.
But what could you do? Refuse? Argue?
“Very well,” you said softly.
Max nodded once then turned to the waiting steward.
“Have the rooms near the library prepared. And make sure the fires are lit.”
“Yes, my lord.”
Oscar and Lando approached then, boots scuffing against the stone floor as they stopped just shy of your side.
Their eyes darted toward you, assessing your posture, searching for some silent confirmation that you were unharmed.
You gave them a small nod, and the tension in Oscar’s broad shoulders seemed to ease, though Lando’s hand remained near the hilt of his sword, his body coiled like a spring.
Max’s sharp gaze swept over the two knights, his expression unreadable but undoubtedly calculating.
“Your people will stay nearby,” he said, his voice firm but unhurried. “Your maid is not to wander without escort. Your men may walk around but not too far from the fortress. I'd rather not deal with the politics of a Southern knight dying in my land.”
Lily bristled at the casual remark, her cheeks coloring with indignation. “We Southerners aren't as fragile as you seem to think,” she said sharply, her words cutting the silence like a knife.
“Lily,” Oscar said quietly, catching her arm before she could step forward. His grip was gentle but firm, head shaking in a silent plea for restraint.
Max didn’t even flinch at her outburst, his cool demeanor unwavering as his gaze flicked back to you.
“Your people are bold.” His tone was tinged with something akin to amusement. “Let’s hope they’re wise enough to temper it.”
“They’re loyal,” you replied evenly, meeting his eyes without faltering. “I wouldn’t have brought them otherwise.”
“Loyalty is admirable but it doesn’t mean much if it gets you killed.”
Lando shifted beside you, jaw tight. “With all due respect, my lord,” he began without much respect at all. “We’re more than capable of keeping her safe.”
“I’m sure you believe that.” Max’s gaze settled on Lando. “But I’ve seen capable men bleed out on these stones for lesser causes. My rules are for your protection as much as mine.”
Lando’s grip on his sword tightened, but Oscar’s hand on his shoulder stilled him.
“We’ll abide by your rules,” Oscar confirmed, voice calm.
“Good.” Max turned back to you. “Come. I’ll show you the library. You should know where it is if you’re to live here.”
The offer caught you off guard. The scion of House Verstappen switched conversations so casually he seemed to slap you with his casualness.
“The library?”
“You can’t spend all your time staring at the snow,” Max replied evenly, though there was a faint lilt to his words.
Was that… humor? It was hard to tell with him.
“Well..” You tugged your coat tighter. “It is very captivating snow.”
Max’s brow arched. “And yet, I think you’ll survive without it for an hour.”
You blinked, taken aback by the dry remark.
Was he… teasing you?
Shaking off the ridiculous thought, you rose from your chair, trailing behind as he turned and strode toward the door.
You glanced at your companions, giving them a small and, hopefully, reassuring smile before stepping forward to follow Max.
Max’s pace was long, purposeful, and you found yourself scrambling to keep up without looking breathless.
(You decidedly ignored Sir Lando's small snort of laughter.)
The manor was a labyrinth of cold stone and dim corridors, the walls lined with tapestries dulled by age.
Shadows flickered where sparse torches burned, giving the place a haunted sort of stillness.
You found it hard to ever imagine yourself calling this place home.
Max moved through the halls like someone who had been shaped by this place, his presence carved into the very bones of the estate.
His stride was confident, measured, purposeful.
You, on the other hand, felt like an outsider, a stranger, each step heavy on the cold stone floor.
Finally, Max stopped before a pair of massive oak doors, their wood darkened with age. He didn’t look back at you as he spoke, his voice low, but managing to carry through the quiet hall.
“Your men stay outside. Your maid may enter,” he said, the command clear.
Your knights exchanged a brief look.
Lando’s lips curled into a smirk, clearly less than thrilled with the command. He let out a sigh, posture straightening with a resigned huff.
With a dramatic roll of his eyes, he moved to one side of the door, giving a theatrical bow as though he were playing a part in some grand performance.
Oscar shook his head but followed suit, taking his place at the other side, hands clasped with a more restrained expression.
Lando’s voice broke the silence, dripping with mock sweetness. “Enjoy the library, my Lady. Try not to get too lost in there.”
You laughed, unable to contain yourself and bid them a silent goodbye.
Without another word, he pushed the doors open, the hinges groaning in protest, and led you and Lily inside.
The library was vast and dim, lined wall-to-wall with shelves that stretched high into the shadows above.
Dust motes floated lazily in the beams of light filtering through the narrow, arched windows, painting the room in shades of gold and gray.
You inhaled deeply, the scent of aged paper and polished wood filling your senses.
“It’s beautiful…” you breathed, the words slipping out unbidden.
“It is,” Max replied, stepping farther into the room. “And it’s yours to use as I allow while you’re here.”
You followed him in, your fingers brushing the spines of the books closest to you. They were thick and heavy, their titles embossed in faded gold.
“Are these… first editions?” you asked, your voice hushed, as if speaking too loudly might awaken some slumbering beast.
“Many of them, yes,” Max said, his gaze sweeping the shelves as if cataloging them in his mind. “You’ll find original prints of histories, poetry, philosophy. Most of it quite rare. Some of the works were commissioned specifically for this collection.”
“Commissioned?” you echoed, eyebrows lifting in surprise.
He nodded. “Yes. House Verstappen has always valued knowledge. There are some volumes here you won’t find anywhere else.”
You let your hand fall from the books and turned to face him. “You must spend a lot of time here then.”
“Not as much as I should,” he admitted, his tone crisp. “But I’m familiar with the layout. If you’re planning to lose yourself, I can point you in the right direction.”
The corner of your mouth quirked up at his phrasing. “Lose myself?”
“It happens.” He shrugged, glancing away.
You laughed softly. “Is that your way of warning me?”
“A mere suggestion,” he corrected, his lips twitching in what might have been the hint of a smile. “Start with the poetry under the windows. It’s a good place for… wandering minds.”
“Poetry under the windows,” you repeated the words under your breath, glancing toward the far end of the room where a faint glow spilled across the shelves. “Any other recommendations?”
“The histories on the east wall are worth your time.” He gestured briefly. “And if you’re feeling adventurous, there’s a collection of letters on the upper mezzanine. They’re in French, though.”
“I can manage French,” you said with a small smile.
His eyebrow arched faintly. “Good. Then you’ll also find some rather colorful accounts of court scandals tucked in the back corner. A few are probably embellished, but they’re entertaining nonetheless.”
Your laughter came easier this time. “Court scandals? I didn’t expect you to recommend something so… frivolous.”
“Frivolity has its place,” he said dryly. “Just don’t let the staff catch you reading them. They might talk.”
“Noted.” You attempted to suppress your grin.
For a moment, the two of you stood in companionable silence, the quiet weight of the library wrapping around you like a cloak. You turned back to the shelves, running your fingertips lightly over the spines once more.
“This is incredible,” you murmured.
You glanced over your shoulder at his lack of a response, catching a faint glimmer of something softer in his eyes, though it vanished almost as quickly as it appeared.
Max seemed to compose himself, clearing his throat. “You will be fetched come dinner time.”
The heavy doors of the library groaned shut behind him, leaving you and Lily in the cavernous stillness.
As soon as the sound of his footsteps faded, Lily let out a sharp exhale, breaking the silence. “I thought he’d never leave,” she muttered, her voice pitched low but urgent.
You turned to her, startled by her tone. “Lily-”
“He’s impossible to read!” she interrupted, her hands gesturing animatedly as she paced a small circle near the door.
“One moment, he’s scowling like the world owes him something, and the next, he’s… he’s practically pointing you toward the best books for a cozy evening! What am I supposed to make of that?”
You blinked, caught between amusement and exasperation. “I don’t think it’s meant to be deciphered, Lily.”
“But it should be!” she shot back, stopping abruptly to face you. “You’re supposed to marry him. How are you supposed to live with someone who switches moods faster than the weather?”
“I don’t think he’s as unpredictable as you think,” you said cautiously, though you weren’t entirely convinced of your own words. “He’s… reserved.”
“Reserved?” Lily snorted. “He looks like he’s trying not to bite anyone’s head off half the time.” She softened slightly, adding, “Although, I’ll admit, it was nice of him to show you this place.”
Her eyes wandered around the library, her earlier frustration melting into a quieter awe. “It really is something, isn’t it?”
You nodded, letting your gaze sweep the towering shelves. “It is. I could lose hours in here.”
“Maybe you’ll have to,” Lily said, her tone lighter now. “If he’s not going to be forthcoming about himself, you might have to dig through the history books to figure him out. Perhaps you'll even find a diary of his.”
You laughed softly, shaking your head. “I think even the books might not have the answers to that mystery.”
Lily gave you a sly grin. “Well, if anyone can figure him out, my lady, it’s you.”
With a roll of your eyes, you turned back to the shelves. “My betrothed's dour personality aside.. help me find that poetry section he mentioned.”
Lily smiled, stepping closer to follow you deeper into the quiet sanctuary of the library.
“Of course, my lady.”
Hours later, as the manor stirred for the evening meal, a servant was dispatched to your quarters. The boy found it strange that the two knights he'd heard his Lord's betrothed had come with weren't stationed by the door.
A sharp knock echoed once. Then again, louder, more insistent.
“My lady?”
Silence.
The servant hesitated, damp palms against the polished wood.
“My lady?” He said again, voice cracking. “My lady, may I come in?”
“...My lady, I'm coming in.”
Then, cautiously, he pushed the door open.
The room was untouched. The bed still perfectly made, the hearth’s fire reduced to flickering embers. Shadows stretched long across the walls, and a chill crept in where warmth should have lingered.
Panic tightened his throat.
He checked the adjoining rooms. The empty sitting area, the silent halls. Nowhere.
Not even your guards and maid were present.
Sweat gathered at his brow as he hurried through the winding corridors, heart hammering as he sought out Lord Verstappen.
He found Max standing near the great hall’s window, dusk spilling through the glass in muted gold.
“My lord,” the servant panted, voice tight. “She’s- she’s gone.”
Max turned slowly. “Gone?”
“I searched her chambers, the halls, the west wing-”
“And the library?” Max’s voice was sharp, cutting through the servant’s stammering explanation.
The servant faltered. “The… the library, my lord?”
“Yes,” Max said evenly, already striding toward the east corridor. “She’s there.”
The servant froze, his jaw slackening. “You… you allowed her inside?”
“Are you questioning me?” Max didn’t even glance back as he continued down the hall, his boots echoing sharply on the stone floor.
“N-no, my lord!” the servant stammered, bowing reflexively. “But should I-”
“Stay where you are,” Max ordered. “I’ll handle this myself.”
Your two knights stood sentinel by the library doors when he approached, arms crossed, their expressions a mixture of boredom and indifference.
They barely acknowledged him, their attention elsewhere as the echo of his boots rang down the corridor.
Max didn’t slow his pace. “Is she still in there?”
Lando flicked a glance toward Oscar, then shrugged. “Yep. She's buried in a book or something,” he said with a nonchalant flick of his wrist, as if it were of little concern.
Max’s eyes narrowed. “You didn’t think to remind her of the time?”
Oscar raised a brow, voice dry. “A certain scion has, unfortunately, forbidden our entry, my lord.”
Max sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose, but Lando was quick to interject with a smirk. “And it’s a lost cause trying to pry our Lady away from a good book. Trust me, we’ve tried.”
Max’s frustration bubbled over into a short, exasperated laugh as he pushed the heavy doors open.
And there you were.
Curled into a high-backed chair, utterly absorbed in the thick, ancient book resting open in your lap.
A few other volumes lay scattered around your feet, their spines cracked open, as if you’d moved through them in a frenzy of curiosity.
Max’s gaze lingered on the sight before him. On the way your head tilted slightly as you read, your brow furrowed in concentration.
His grip on the doorframe loosened, but his jaw remained tight.
“My lady.”
You glanced up, startled but then smiled when you saw him. “Oh, my- Max, What are you doing here again?”
Max’s brow arched slightly at your casual tone. His irritation wavered.
He knew you were about to say ‘my Lord’ again, knew it was a mere slip of the tongue, court etiquette taking over before personal sense.
But.. my Max. Yes, he supposed he was indeed yours.
He couldn't say that though so when he spoke, it was only a disinterested, “It’s dinner time.”
You blinked, glancing toward the tall windows where the light had shifted to deep amber.
“Already? I hadn’t even realized-” You glanced down at the book in your lap, reluctant to put it aside. “I haven’t even finished this chapter.”
His gaze dropped to the title in your hands. “Faust,” he noted, tucking the information away. “You read German?”
You blinked, caught off guard. “I… only at an elementary level.”
Max's eyebrow arched slightly. You were either a liar or terribly humble.
“Faust,” he repeated dryly. “Hardly a book for someone with only elementary German. Your skills are passable, at least.”
“Just enough to get by,” you admitted, more honest now, brushing invisible dust from your skirt as you stood.
Max offered his arm, and you took it without hesitation this time.
He noticed, though he said nothing about the change, afraid that if he voiced it out you'd withdraw again.
“You might find Faust more rewarding if you read it in context,” he remarked as you walked down the hall, your knights and maid following behind.
You glanced up at him, curious. “And what context would that be?”
“Understanding Goethe’s philosophical explorations, for one. Or at least recognizing the poetic structure in its original form.”
You tilted your head. “So now you’re saying my German isn’t good enough?”
“I’m saying it’s a pity to read something monumental in fragments,” he replied. “Not a criticism.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” The corners of your lips quirked upward.
“Take it as you like.” He offered you a small shrug, though there was the faintest trace of amusement in his eyes.
A beat of silence passed before he spoke again. “Which German do you struggle with?”
“Official documents,” you admitted. “The kind that's full of overly formal phrasing and unnecessary flourish.”
Max hummed, thoughtful. Most official documents were indeed like that. “I could assist with that, should the need arise.”
You blinked at him, caught off guard by the offer. “You would?”
“If I find myself having time.”
“Thank you.”
He shook his head, brushing off your words. “And don't sit too close to the mezzanine shelves,” he added. “They’re unstable.”
Your brows rose. “Unstable?”
“I don’t need you buried beneath three hundred years of German history,” he said, his tone casual but his meaning clear.
A laugh bubbled up before you could stop it. “You’d miss me, then?”
“More likely, the servants would revolt,” he said, gesturing to the doors to the dining hall. “Dinner then, shall we?”
The dining hall was an expansive, imposing space, its vaulted ceilings casting long shadows over the vast table.
Candles decorated much of the available surfaces in a surprisingly tasteful way.
Their flames flickered weakly, struggling to combat the cold that clung to the stone walls like it was a living, breathing thing.
The table stretched far ahead, but only two places were set.
Max took his seat at the head without so much as a glance in your direction, and you slid into the chair opposite him.
Lily quietly withdrew to prepare for your night routine while Lando and Oscar remained a fair distance away, leaving the two of you some privacy to discuss.
Servants moved efficiently, placing the first course on the table: roast venison, honeyed carrots, and freshly baked bread that had already begun to cool in the chill air.
The earlier conversation about books had petered out, leaving a quiet in its wake.
Max ate as though entirely alone, his focus on the meal before him.
You shifted in your seat, the faint scrape of your fork against the plate feeling almost intrusive.
"You know," you began tentatively, "for someone who seems to enjoy books, you’re surprisingly difficult to talk to about them."
Max’s knife paused mid-slice, his eyes flicking up to meet yours.
There was no hostility in his gaze, but his expression was unreadable all the same. “Talking about books is rarely as rewarding as reading them.”
“That sounds suspiciously like an excuse,” you said, trying to inject a bit of lightness into the moment. “Or maybe you just don’t know how to have a proper discussion about them.”
His lips twitched slightly, as if the idea amused him, though he didn’t smile. “Do you often accuse your dining companions of conversational ineptitude, or am I a special case?”
“That depends.” You tore off a piece of bread. “Are you going to prove me wrong?”
Max tilted his head, studying you with quiet curiosity, like someone turning over a puzzle piece in their mind.
“Very well.” He set his knife down carefully. “What would you like to discuss? Goethe? Schiller?”
“Bold of you to assume I am especially fond of German authors. Perhaps I just picked up Faust in the library on a whim.” You smiled. “But if you must know, I’ve been working through Balzac recently.”
He raised an eyebrow, his expression shifting slightly, though still difficult to read. “Balzac? Ambitious. And how are you finding him?”
“Dense,” you admitted with a laugh. “Brilliant, but dense. Definitely not light reading.”
“Few worthwhile things are,” he replied, returning to his meal. “Though I’ve always found Balzac’s fascination with ambition rather… tiresome.”
“Really?” you asked, curious. “Why?”
He took a measured sip of wine before answering. “Because I’ve seen enough ambition in reality to find little appeal in it as fiction.”
You smiled faintly, tilting your head. “And yet, here you are. A product of generations of ambition.”
His gaze darkened slightly, though not in anger.
There was a flicker of something, maybe hesitation, before he spoke. “Careful,” he said, his voice low and quiet. “You’re treading close to dangerous ground.”
“Am I?” you asked, though your tone was gentler now, almost teasing. “I thought we were just talking about books.”
Before he could respond, the servants re-entered, clearing the first course and placing the next before you.
The interruption softened the tension, and you let the moment breathe.
When the room was quiet again, you spoke, this time more cautiously. “Alright, then. Enough about me. What about you? What are you reading?”
Max’s fork paused mid-motion, and he set it down with deliberate care. “Does it matter?”
“Of course, it matters,” you replied, leaning forward slightly. “How else am I supposed to judge your taste?”
For a moment, you thought you saw the faintest glimmer of a smile. “If you must know, The Sorrows of Young Werther.”
You blinked, surprised. “Goethe’s most sentimental work? I wouldn’t have guessed.”
“Sentimentality has its uses,” he said dryly, though there was no real bite to his words. “Even you might agree.”
“Are you suggesting I’m sentimental?” you arched a brow.
“I’m suggesting you’re curious,” he replied, his tone even. “Perhaps overly so.”
“Fair.” You conceded with a small laugh. “But I’m curious.. what draws you to it? The tragedy? The unrequited love?”
He hesitated for just a moment, his gaze dropping briefly before he answered.
“The futility,” he said quietly, lifting his wine glass. “Of longing for something you cannot have.”
For a moment, you didn’t know how to respond, the honesty in his tone catching you off guard. When he didn’t elaborate, you picked up your own glass, letting the silence linger without pressing further.
“You have a rather bleak outlook, don’t you?” you asked finally, your voice softer now.
“Realistic,” he corrected, not unkindly, his gaze flicking back to yours. “Not everyone has the luxury of optimism.”
You frowned slightly, not entirely sure how to reply. “It’s not about luxury,” you said after a pause. “It’s about perspective.”
“Perspective is shaped by reality.” His eyes met yours, boring. “And reality is rarely kind.”
The conversation lulled again, but this time it felt less uneasy and more thoughtful.
As dinner wrapped up, Max glanced at your knights before settling on you, his tone lightening as he spoke. “I trust you can find your rooms?”
You nodded, standing from your chair. “Yes, I think so.”
“No late-night wandering, then?” he asked, his voice carrying the faintest trace of amusement.
Max’s lips twitched again, softer this time, as if he might actually be considering a smile. “Good. I’d hate to have to rescue you from some misstep in the dark.”
You tilted your head, feigning innocence. “What makes you think I’d need rescuing?”
“Experience,” he said simply, the faintest flicker of amusement in his eyes.
The air between you shifted slightly, the earlier sharpness fading into something more subdued.
You allowed yourself a small laugh, breaking the lingering tension. “I’ll have you know I’m quite capable of finding my way around.”
“Is that so?” he replied, leaning back in his chair. His tone had softened, the sharp edges dulling to a quiet curiosity. “Well, then. I suppose I’ll trust you.”
“Trust,” you repeated, letting the word hang between you. “A bold move, considering we’ve only just met.”
Max regarded you for a moment, his expression unreadable. “Bold, perhaps. But necessary.”
You hesitated, unsure how to respond. There was something in his voice, quiet, measured, and entirely unexpected, that made you pause. The weight of the moment settled around you like the faint flicker of the candlelight, warm yet fragile.
“Well,” you said finally. “I suppose I should be flattered.”
“Don’t let it go to your head.”
He rose from his seat with practiced ease, the flicker of warmth in his eyes quickly hidden behind his composed demeanor. “Goodnight, then.”
You watched him as he left the dining hall, his steps measured and deliberate, the echo of his footsteps fading into the vast, empty space.
For a moment, you sat in the quiet, your gaze lingering on the door where he had disappeared.
Finally, you stood, the faintest smile playing at your lips. “Goodnight, Max,” you murmured to the empty room.
—-
The first light of dawn crept through the heavy drapes of your room, painting the walls in soft hues of gold and silver. The air carried a sharp chill, the promise of frost lingering just outside the thick panes of glass.
Everything was still, save for the faint crackle of the fire in the hearth and the soft rustling of fabric as Lily moved about with quiet precision.
She bent over a polished wooden chair, her deft hands smoothing out the folds of the attire she’d chosen for you.
A cloak of deep crimson lay draped across her arm, its rich, heavy fabric catching the faint light. You stirred in your bed, watching her through half-lidded eyes as she worked.
“Good morning, Lily,” you murmured, sitting up and drawing the blankets closer against the morning chill.
Lily turned with a warm smile, setting the cloak on the bed beside you. “Good morning, my Lady. Did you sleep well?”
“Well enough,” you replied, your fingers brushing the thick velvet of the cloak. You tilted your head, examining it with curiosity. “I don’t recall seeing this in my wardrobe before.”
“It was delivered just this morning,” Lily explained, her tone light but tinged with amusement. “A gift, I believe, from Lord Verstappen.”
Your brows lifted as you traced the intricate embroidery along the hem, tiny silver threads woven into delicate patterns. “From Lord Verstappen?”
She nodded, folding her hands in front of her. “He must have assumed the worst given your attire yesterday.”
“It’s rather heavy,” you remarked, holding it up to feel its weight.
Lily gave you a knowing smile, her tone dry but affectionate. “I think I speak for all of us when I say that I’d rather you walk with less grace than freeze, my Lady.”
You let out a soft laugh, shaking your head as you draped the cloak over your shoulders.
It was impossibly warm, the kind of warmth that seeped through your skin and settled in your bones. “You’re not wrong. I suppose there’s no room for vanity when winter comes knocking.”
“None at all,” Lily agreed, moving to adjust the cloak, fastening the silver clasp at your throat. “Besides, the color suits you. Lord Verstappen has surprisingly good taste. I'd have assumed he’d just grab any old thing and force you into it.”
You raised a brow at the tone that laced her words, giving her a sidelong glance. “Flattery for him, Lily? Are you trying to curry favor? And here I thought you were quite ready to sock him just yesterday.”
She feigned innocence, stepping back with a twinkle in her eye. “Not at all, my Lady. But if he keeps sending gifts like this, I might just start.”
Your laughter filled the room, chasing away the last remnants of sleep. You were somewhat glad Lily saw him as redeemable after yesterday.
After all, she was usually a good judge of character.
As you stood, the cloak fell around you like a royal mantle, its weight grounding but comforting.
By the time you entered the dining hall, Max was already seated at the long table, a vision of composed efficiency.
His pale hair was still perfectly swept back, not a strand out of place, and a small stack of documents sat before him.
His pen moved steadily across the paper, his focus unbroken even as the golden morning light softened the sharpness of his features.
“Good morning, Max,” you said, sliding into the chair across from him, your tone deliberately chipper.
Max glanced up briefly, eyes meeting yours with the barest flicker of warmth.
“Good morning,” he replied, setting his pen down with the precision of a man who never did anything carelessly. “You’re up early.”
“It’s rather difficult to stay in bed when the frost feels like it's climbing up to sleep with you,” you said, grabbing a warm roll from the plate near you. “Do you have a deal with the weather to ensure I never sleep in?”
A faint smile tugged at his lips. “I’ll admit to nothing. But if the frost succeeds, perhaps I should reward it.”
“Ha! I’d like to see you try,” you said, tearing a piece of bread and slathering it with butter. “I’ve made my peace with it, though. I realized there was a charm to the winter once I got over the whole ‘freezing to death’ aspect.”
Max arched a brow, his eyes sparkling faintly with what you hoped was amusement. “A charm, you say? I wasn’t aware you were so poetic in the mornings.”
“Oh, I’m a veritable bard before breakfast,” you said. “In fact, I was just composing a sonnet about how frostbite builds character.”
He snorted softly as he reached for his tea, the sound barely audible, but it felt like a victory. “I’ll be sure to commission a copy of it for the library.”
You leaned back in your chair, feeling emboldened by his rare moment of humor
“Speaking of things worth writing about, I was thinking of spending some time in the garden today. It looks magical with the frost.”
Max paused, his teacup halfway to his lips, and gave you a look that bordered on incredulous. “The garden? In winter?”
“Yes, the garden,” you said, undeterred. “You do realize it’s still a garden, even when it’s cold?”
He set his cup down slowly, as if trying to process your words. “You are aware that nothing grows in the garden during winter, yes? Unless you count the weeds, which I doubt have much aesthetic appeal.”
“There are flowers that survive in winter,” you said with a pointed look.
He tilted his head, his expression blank. “Like what? Frozen dandelions?”
“Snowdrops, holly, winter jasmine,” you listed off, ticking them off on your fingers. “I saw some while passing by yesterday. Honestly, do you even know what’s in your own garden?”
Max leaned back slightly. “I delegate. Why bother when there are people who are willing to brave the frost to catalog it all for me?”
You rolled your eyes, unable to hide your grin. “How magnanimous of you.”
He inclined his head slightly, as though you’d paid him a genuine compliment. “It’s a skill.”
“You should come with me,” you said suddenly. “A little walk in the fresh air couldn’t hurt. Who knows? You might even enjoy it.”
He hesitated, his fingers tapping lightly against the rim of his teacup. “I appreciate the invitation,” he said finally, his tone carefully polite. “But my duties don’t often allow for such… luxuries.”
“Luxuries?” you raised a brow. “Surely even a Lord like yourself deserves a moment to himself.”
He chuckled softly, the sound low and rare, but it faded quickly. “Perhaps another time.”
You nodded, masking your disappointment with a practiced smile. “Of course. I wouldn’t want to distract you from your responsibilities.”
“Distraction,” he repeated, his gaze lingering on you longer than necessary.
Something unspoken flickered in his eyes, and though his expression remained composed, there was the faintest hint of something warmer beneath the surface.
“Perhaps,” he said again, this time softer, almost to himself.
You glanced down, heat creeping up your cheeks, and busied yourself with your breakfast.
—-
The steady scratch of a quill against parchment filled the room, broken only by the occasional shuffle of papers.
Max leaned over his desk, eyes scanning the dense columns of reports.
The study was dim, the late afternoon light barely filtering through the heavy curtains. The fire in the hearth had burned low, casting long, flickering shadows across the walls.
Yet, for all his focus, his pen paused mid-sentence.
His thoughts drifted. Again.
To you.
He could see it vividly in his mind: the garden cloaked in frost, each branch thin and brittle beneath the weight of winter.
You would be there, wouldn’t you? Bundled in that wool cloak you favored, breath curling in the cold air as you traced the icy edges of dormant rose bushes.
You had mentioned it offhandedly this morning, your plan to spend the afternoon outside despite the chill.
Max let out a slow breath, frowning at the parchment before him.
The words blurred, meaningless.
It was ridiculous.
You were likely gone by now, the cold too sharp to endure for long.
Rationality urged him to stay, to finish the reports that demanded his attention.
Yet the thought persisted.
Why did it matter if you were still there?
It shouldn’t.
And yet.
The chair scraped quietly against the floor as he stood.
He didn’t bother with his coat. The cold would be a brief inconvenience.
His steps were measured as he left the study, though there was a certain tension in his stride, as if he was trying to convince himself this was a simple walk and nothing more.
The manor’s halls gave way to the biting air of winter, and Max inhaled sharply, the cold seeping through the thin fabric of his sleeves.
The gravel path crunched beneath his boots as he crossed into the garden.
The world was quiet here. Still.
The pale sun sagged low in the sky, casting a silver sheen over frost-laced branches and brittle hedges. Even the air felt suspended, holding its breath.
He scanned the expanse, expecting, no, hoping, to see a flicker of movement among the barren trees.
Nothing.
Max’s jaw tightened.
Of course. You wouldn’t have waited. Hours had passed. Why would you linger in the cold for him? The thought was absurd.
He moved forward anyway, slow and deliberate, his hands clasped behind his back as if that could restrain the growing restlessness in his chest.
Each turn of the path yielded only more empty frost-covered stone.
Once.
Twice.
A third time around, and still nothing.
Perhaps this was a mistake.
He turned to leave.
Then, faintly, the sound of movement, a soft rustle of fabric.
His head snapped up.
And there you were.
Tucked into the curve of a stone bench, half-hidden by the skeletal branches of the hedgerow.
A book lay open in your lap, your gloved fingers idly turning the page.
Max stared.
You hadn’t left.
A strange feeling settled in his chest, something between relief and unease.
He didn’t speak, not immediately. For a moment, he simply watched you, the way your breath misted in the cold, how your hair caught the pale light.
He wasn’t sure why he’d come out here.
But now that he had, he found he didn’t want to leave.
Max exhaled quietly, letting the breath curl away into the cold.
He stood perfectly still, half-concealed by the bare limbs of the hedgerow, his figure blending into the stark winter landscape. The cold gnawed at him, a sharp wind threading through the thin fabric of his sleeves, but he didn’t move.
His breath escaped in thin, controlled streams of vapor, dissipating into the frigid air.
And still, his eyes remained fixed on you.
You sat quietly on the stone bench, bundled in the cloak he'd ordered a servant to bring to you last night come morning, its edges stiff with frost.
A book rested in your lap, your gloved fingers lazily tracing the brittle page edges as you turned them.
Every now and then, you paused, eyes lifting to watch the pale sun as it sagged toward the horizon, before returning to your reading.
Max’s hands tightened behind his back.
He shouldn’t be here.
There was no reason to be.
And yet, he didn’t leave.
He told himself it was coincidence, that his steps had simply led him here after hours of restless pacing in his study.
But even that excuse felt thin, crumbling under the weight of his own unease.
He exhaled slowly, the breath catching in the cold.
Why didn’t you go inside? The air was sharp and biting.
Anyone with sense would’ve retreated to the warmth of the manor by now. Yet you sat there still, as if waiting for something.
Or someone.
A ridiculous thought.
Max’s jaw tightened.
"You know," a dry voice cut through the stillness, "standing there staring is a bit creepy, my Lord.”
Max turned sharply, his cold glare snapping to the armored figure leaning casually against the frosted stone archway.
Oscar.
The knight stood with an infuriating air of nonchalance, one hand resting on the pommel of his sword, the other shoved lazily into the crook of his elbow. His breath misted lazily in the cold air, a faint smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“You’re out of line.” Max’s voice was flat, the warning unmistakable.
Oscar only raised an eyebrow, entirely unbothered. “Probably. But you’ve been standing long enough that I figured someone should say something.”
Max’s glare deepened.
Oscar tilted his head slightly toward the garden. “You could just speak to her, you know. I’m half certain she wouldn’t mind.”
“I have no intention of interrupting her,” Max said coolly, though the words rang hollow even to his own ears.
Oscar made a thoughtful noise, tapping a gloved finger against his chin. “No, of course not. That’s why you’re skulking in the hedges instead of being a normal person and saying hello.”
Max’s mouth tightened into a thin line. “You have duties. Attend to them.”
Oscar chuckled under his breath. “Oh, I am attending to them. Protecting the lady, making sure her suitors aren’t lurking about. You know, the usual.”
Max’s eyes narrowed dangerously.
Oscar didn’t flinch.
“Did she not mention this morning she hoped you’d join her out here?” the knight asked offhandedly, brushing frost off his shoulder. “But maybe I heard wrong. Could’ve been the wind.”
Max didn’t respond.
Oscar let the silence stretch for a moment before shrugging. “Well. Suit yourself.”
With that, he pushed off the archway and strode casually toward you, boots crunching against the frost-laden gravel.
Max didn’t move. His gaze followed Oscar with a cold, sharp focus, but his feet remained planted, weighed down by something heavier than pride.
Oscar’s figure grew smaller as he neared you.
And then, you looked up.
Your face softened in recognition, lips curving into a faint smile as your knight approached. Max’s chest tightened inexplicably.
“You’ve been out here a while, my lady,” Oscar remarked lightly, stopping beside the stone bench.
You laughed softly, the sound carrying faintly through the still air. “Longer than I meant to. Has it gotten that late already?”
“Late enough,” Oscar said, leaning slightly against the stone edge. “Cold enough too, I imagine.”
You exhaled, watching the breath curl away. “The cold’s not so bad.”
Oscar smirked. “If you say so. Though I passed Lord Max earlier. He was out here too.”
Your eyes lifted, blinking in quiet surprise. “Was he?”
Oscar hummed. “Looked like he was thinking about joining you. Or maybe just staring at you. Hard to tell with him.”
Your gaze flicked toward the distant paths, searching the empty garden.
Oscar watched you carefully. “Still might be lurking somewhere. Shadows seem to agree with him.”
You smiled faintly, but your eyes lingered on the hedgerows, thoughtful.
Oscar nudged a frost-coated pebble with his boot. “You know… if you wanted him here, you could just call him out. Maybe the shame will make his feet move.”
You glanced at him, arching a brow.
He smirked. “Just a thought, my Lady.”
Oscar pushed off the bench. “Come on. You’ll catch cold if you stay out much longer.”
As they turned to head back toward the manor, Max stood still, hidden beyond the hedges.
His hands clenched slowly at his sides.
And then, finally, he turned and walked away.
The frost crunched beneath his boots, louder than before.
The rest of the month at the Verstappen estate unfolded in slow, deliberate strokes, like the steady brush of winter wind against frosted glass.
The walls of cold formality between you and Max didn’t crumble overnight, but there were cracks now. Thin, hairline fractures where something softer threatened to seep through.
Max remained composed, distant, his every word and gesture measured. Yet every so often, something flickered.
A hesitation before he spoke. A glance that lingered longer than necessary.
Small, fleeting moments that barely seemed to matter, but they did. They built something fragile and new, fragile as frost on stone.
It started with the garden.
You had grown fond of the winter gardens. Quiet, stark, and untouched. The biting air sharpened your senses, and the stillness gave you space to breathe, something you often struggled to find within the Verstappen estate's cold, towering walls.
You were seated at the breakfast table one morning, fingers curled around your tea for warmth.
Your eyes traced the frost-laced hedgerows beyond the tall windows, lost in thought.
“I’ll accompany you today.”
The voice was quiet but certain, breaking through your reverie.
Your head snapped up.
Max stood across the room, a stack of documents in hand, his expression unreadable.
“…Pardon?”
His gaze didn’t waver. “To the gardens. I’ll walk with you.”
You stared at him, caught off guard. “You want to… walk. Outside. In the cold.”
A slight tilt of his head. “Yes.”
“You?”
His jaw tensed, a muscle ticking. “Is that so difficult to believe?”
“Frankly? Yes.” You set your teacup down carefully, studying him. “Don’t you have something far more important to do than trail after me like some-”
“I hardly think safeguarding my betrothed is beneath me,” he cut in smoothly, though something in his tone lacked its usual sharpness.
You raised a brow. “Safeguard me? Max, it’s a garden, not a battlefield.”
He didn’t answer, only held your gaze steadily.
A smile tugged at the corner of your mouth. “Well, far be it from me to refuse the protection of a lord.”
Max inclined his head, as if the matter was settled.
The cold met you both immediately as you stepped into the garden.
You drew your coat tighter. Max, of course, didn’t seem to notice the cold at all.
His steps were measured, boots crunching against the frost-dusted path. He kept half a step ahead of you, his hands clasped neatly behind his back.
The silence stretched. And stretched.
Then, abruptly-
“Those are evergreens.”
You blinked.
“…Yes. They are.”
Max gave a small nod, as if confirming a fact. “They endure the winter well.”
"That is typically how evergreens work."
Silence.
You bit your lip, fighting the smile threatening to surface.
Max cleared his throat, his eyes flicking forward again. "I thought it was worth mentioning."
"It was very insightful," you teased lightly.
His jaw tightened, though you noticed the faintest flush at the tips of his ears.
The silence stretched again, but it didn’t feel so suffocating now.
"I don’t…" he started, then stopped. His hands flexed behind his back. "I’m not particularly… good at this."
You tilted your head. "At walking?”
A sharp exhale, half a laugh, half frustration. "At this. Talking. Being-" he paused, as if the word itself burned. "-approachable."
You considered him for a moment. "You’re not as terrible as you think."
His eyes flicked to yours, uncertain.
"You just talk about trees a lot."
That earned a genuine huff of breath. Not quite a laugh, but close.
"I’ll… keep that in mind.”
Days slipped by like soft falling snow, quiet and unhurried. And so did the walks.
The first few outings had been brittle, every step and word sharp with awkwardness. But little by little, the stiffness began to melt.
It wasn’t anything grand, no sweeping gestures or sudden confessions, but something quieter. Subtle.
Max no longer fumbled for conversation, and you no longer waited for him to.
Sometimes you spoke. Sometimes you didn’t. And somehow, the silences became easier.
There was comfort in it, like the steady crunch of frost beneath your boots or the way your breath curled in the cold air.
It started with small things.
One morning, as you walked past a thicket of frost-covered hedges, Max slowed his pace, watching you with a flicker of curiosity.
“You always stop here.”
You glanced at him, surprised he noticed. “It’s peaceful.”
His eyes followed yours to the bare branches dusted in white.
“Hm.” He made a low sound of acknowledgment, then fell quiet.
The next day, you noticed he lingered near that spot, as if waiting for you to pause first.
He didn’t say anything, but it was enough.
Another morning, you stumbled slightly on the uneven path, your boot catching on a patch of ice.
Before you could right yourself, a steady hand caught your elbow.
You blinked, looking up.
Max’s hand hovered there, his grip careful but sure.
His expression was unreadable, but his touch was steady.
“You should watch your step,” he murmured.
You stared at him for a beat too long.
“I was,” you said finally, a little breathless.
His hand dropped back to his side, and he turned away before you could see the faint pink creeping up his neck.
The next day, the path had been salted.
You never mentioned it. Neither did he.
But the air between you felt lighter.
Then, there was the matter of the scarf.
It was colder than usual that morning. Bitter wind snuck through the layers of your coat and scarf, nipping at your skin.
Max noticed.
“You’re cold,” he said flatly.
You glanced at him, defensive. “It’s winter. Everyone’s cold.”
He was quiet for a moment. Then, without a word, he unwound the dark wool scarf from his neck and held it out to you.
You blinked.
“…What are you doing?”
“You need it more than I do.”
You stared at the scarf, then at him. “Max, I’m not going to take your scarf. That’s ridiculous.”
“It’s practical,” he replied, tone perfectly serious.
You huffed a laugh. “Oh, is it? And what about you?”
“I’ll manage.”
His expression didn’t waver.
After a long pause, you sighed and took the scarf from his hands.
It was warm. Warmer than yours, and it smelled faintly of cedar and something crisp, like winter air.
You looped it around your neck, hiding a small smile.
“Happy now?”
Max gave a short nod. “Good.”
The next day, he wore a thicker coat.
You said nothing.
Neither did he.
But his gaze lingered on the scarf around your neck.
And that was enough.
The silences softened after that.
Some days, Max would walk slightly ahead, hands behind his back, eyes on the path.
Other days, he matched your stride, quiet but near.
Once, as you passed a row of brittle rose bushes, you paused, brushing your glove over the thorns.
Max stopped beside you.
“They won’t bloom again until spring.”
“I know.”
He was quiet for a moment.
“They’re still... nice to look at,” he admitted.
You glanced at him.
“That’s surprisingly sentimental of you.”
A slight shrug. “They’re resilient. Even now.”
You smiled, soft and secret.
Another day, you caught him watching you when you laughed at something small. A small squirrel darting through the snow, slipping and scrambling back up a tree.
Max didn’t laugh, but something flickered in his eyes.
Not amusement.
Something warmer.
He looked away when you caught him, but you didn’t tease him for it.
The walks stretched longer. The conversations grew softer.
There were no grand declarations, no sweeping changes.
Just the slow, steady thaw of winter.
And for now, that was enough.
—-
It happened on an ordinary day, so ordinary that you couldn’t have guessed it would stand out for any reason at all.
You were sitting in the common room, absentmindedly flipping through a file, your thoughts half on the task and half on the cup of tea cooling beside you.
You were aware of Max nearby, as you always seemed to be. The two of you had taken to spending your quiet moments together for some reason.
He was seated at the far corner, half-hidden behind a stack of papers, his focus presumably locked on his work.
Or so you thought.
It wasn’t until you reached for your tea, your eyes lifting momentarily, that you noticed it. His gaze.
Max was staring at you.
It wasn’t a casual glance or a quick flicker of attention. His eyes were fixed, steady, like he was studying you without even realizing it.
There was something almost unreadable in his expression, his usual guarded demeanor softened by a hint of… curiosity? Thoughtfulness? You couldn’t quite place it.
For a moment, you froze, unsure what to do. Should you look away? Pretend you hadn’t noticed? Confront him?
The options raced through your mind in a tangle, but before you could decide, Max blinked, as though snapping out of a trance.
His gaze shifted back to the papers in front of him, his movements abrupt and uncharacteristically awkward.
He cleared his throat quietly, shuffling the documents with more focus than necessary.
You felt your cheeks warm, a faint heat creeping up your neck. It wasn’t like Max to lose his composure, even slightly.
You wondered what he’d been thinking. Or if he’d even realized what he was doing.
“Everything alright?” you asked, breaking the silence before it could stretch uncomfortably long. Your voice was casual, light, as though the moment hadn’t happened.
Max didn’t look up immediately, his jaw tightening for a fraction of a second. “Fine,” he said, his tone clipped, but there was a faint edge to it, something almost defensive.
You tilted your head, studying him for a beat longer. “You sure? You looked… distracted.”
He finally met your gaze, his expression unreadable again, but this time you thought you caught the faintest flicker of something.
Embarrassment, maybe, or irritation at being caught.
“I’m sure,” he said, his tone more even now.
“Alright,” you said lightly, turning back to your file with a small shrug. But your heart was still racing, and you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering what had just passed between you.
As the moments ticked by, you resisted the urge to glance at him again, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of his earlier stare.
The two of you found yourselves in the library again, a rare moment of calm amidst the usual chaos.
Max sat across from you, his attention drifting between the book in his hands and the room around him.
For once, he wasn’t buried in paperwork or fielding endless questions from others, and the quiet was almost comforting.
The soft rustle of turning pages and the muted hum of your own reading filled the air.
It was a stillness that wrapped around you both, unspoken but shared, a silence that felt like an unacknowledged truce.
Until the peace fractured.
A faint groan of wood sliced through the quiet, subtle at first but growing louder, sharper. You frowned, your eyes flicking upward from your book.
Max noticed the sound too, his head tilting slightly as his attention shifted.
“What was that?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Max didn’t answer right away, his eyes narrowing as the groaning intensified. “Stay here,” he muttered, already rising from his chair.
But before either of you could move further, the source of the noise revealed itself.
The tall shelf in the corner swayed unnaturally, its weight shifting in a way that made your stomach twist.
“Max-” you started, panic creeping into your voice.
And then it happened. The shelf gave way.
Books tumbled from its upper shelves like a cascade of water, filling the air with dull thuds and sharp cracks.
The massive structure pitched toward you, and you froze, your feet rooted in place.
“Move!” a voice yelled.
You barely registered the shout before a strong hand grabbed your arm, yanking you back with such force that your book flew from your grasp.
Your back slammed into something solid. Someone’s chest.
A deafening crash filled the room as the shelf slammed into the ground, its impact sending vibrations through the floor.
Books scattered in every direction, some sliding to a stop at your feet.
“Are you okay?” Max’s voice was sharp, edged with panic. His hand still gripped your arm, his knuckles white from the effort.
You turned toward him, your breath coming in short, uneven gasps. “I… I think so.”
His eyes darted over you, scanning for any sign of injury. “Did it hit you?” he asked, his voice quieter but no less urgent.
“No,” you managed. “I’m fine. Just… shaken.”
Max exhaled sharply, his shoulders sagging as some of the tension left him.
He dropped his hand from your arm, stepping back to give you space, but his gaze stayed locked on you.
“I should’ve seen it coming,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. “I knew it was old..” He trailed off, his jaw tightening.
You shook your head, still trying to steady your breathing. “You couldn’t have known it would fall like that.”
His brow furrowed, frustration flickering across his face. “I should’ve checked it. What if-” He cut himself off, his jaw working as he looked away.
“It didn’t,” you said firmly. “You pulled me out of the way. That’s what matters.”
Max’s expression didn’t soften. If anything, his frown deepened. “This shouldn’t have happened in the first place. I should’ve-”
“Stop,” you interrupted, your voice firmer than you expected. “Max, you can’t blame yourself. You didn’t push the shelf. You didn’t make it fall.”
He met your gaze then, his eyes dark and filled with a storm of emotions. “But I could’ve stopped it,” he said quietly, almost to himself.
You hesitated, unsure how to respond. The raw guilt in his voice surprised you. It was rare to see Max shaken. You didn't even think it possible.
“You did stop it. At least for me,” you said softly.
He stared at you for a moment, his expression unreadable.
Finally, he sighed and stepped toward the wreckage. “This is a mess,” he muttered, his tone shifting to something more clipped, controlled. “I’ll get someone to clean it up. You should go sit down. Get some air.”
You followed his gaze to the pile of broken wood and scattered books. The sight made your stomach twist, but you forced yourself to speak. “I’ll help. I was here too.”
“No,” Max said quickly, holding up a hand. “You’ve had enough of a scare for one day. Just… take a break, alright?”
You hesitated, then nodded reluctantly. “Fine. But only because you asked.”
Max gave a short, almost reluctant nod in return. “Good. I’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again.”
As you turned to leave, you glanced back at him. He was already moving toward the debris, his focus shifting entirely to the mess. But the tension in his shoulders hadn’t eased, and you knew he’d be carrying the weight of what could have happened for a while.
And so would you.
—-
The realization that you fancied Max struck with all the subtlety of a thunderclap.
You fancied your fiancé. Oh, God. You fancied your fiancé.
The thought struck you like a bolt of lightning, the weight of it settling heavily in your chest as you paced back and forth across your room.
With each step, the walls of the room seemed to shrink around you, the air thick with the suffocating pressure of your own spiraling thoughts.
How had this happened? Why him? Of all people, why Max?
Stoic, distant Max, the man you barely even knew.
“It’s a trick of the mind. A reaction to circumstance,” you whispered, the words directed at your own reflection in the mirror.
Your face was pinched, your brow furrowed, and your eyes wide with a mixture of dread and something… else.
You rubbed at your temples, as though the act might banish the errant thoughts swirling in your mind.
“It’s admiration,” you said aloud, as if hearing the words would make them true. “Respect for his… demeanor. His resolve.”
You faltered, the image of Max flickering to life in your mind.
His measured gaze, the faint crease at the corner of his mouth when he was deep in thought.
The way his presence seemed to command the air around him.
Stop it.
“Lily!” you called out suddenly, your voice higher than you intended, panic rising sharply in your throat. “Lily, please, come here!”
The door creaked open, and Lily entered with her usual composed air, her eyes softening as soon as she took in the sight of your distress.
“My Lady, what’s wrong? You look...” she trailed off, hesitation in her tone as she glanced at you, clearly noting the unease written across your face.
“Don’t even say it,” you interrupted quickly, pressing your palms to your temples in an effort to stave off the rising panic. “I’m losing my mind, Lily. I think... I think I have feelings for Max.”
Lily regarded you for a long moment, her expression unreadable, but there was a subtle shift in her eyebrow.
A hint of intrigue that you couldn’t quite place. She did not seem surprised.
“Max?” she asked, her voice calm, though the faintest hint of something stirred in her eyes. “As in, your betrothed, Lord Max Verstappen?”
“Yes! That Max!” you exclaimed, turning toward her with wide, frantic eyes, feeling the chaos inside you deepen with every word you spoke. “What other Max would I be talking about?!”
Lily paused for a moment, her eyes assessing you, the soft lines of her face betraying no judgment, only careful understanding.
Finally, she spoke, her tone even, but with an edge of something like amusement.
“Well,” she said thoughtfully, “I’m glad it’s not hatred you’re feeling.”
You blinked, surprised at her response. “What?”
She gave you a small, wry smile, her hands folding gently in front of her. “I’m glad you don’t detest the man you’re engaged to. That’s a start, isn’t it? At least you’re not loathing him.”
You gaped at her, your mind still reeling from the gravity of your own emotions. “But this isn’t nothing, Lily! This isn’t just some passing fancy. I can’t stop thinking about him. Every time he’s near, I feel like I’m going to lose my mind. I don’t know how to act around him. It’s like- like he’s too close and I’m too far from myself.”
Lily’s gaze softened, but she did not rush to soothe you with easy words.
She tilted her head slightly, her voice measured but firm. “Feelings like these don’t appear overnight, My Lady. They don’t disappear either. But you’re right. You don’t know him very well yet. You’ve got time to work this out, slowly. You don’t have to have it all figured out now.”
You nodded, but the knot in your stomach only tightened as a new wave of uncertainty washed over you.
“I don’t know what to do with all of this, Lily. What if I say something wrong? What if I act like a fool in front of him? What if... what if he doesn’t care at all?”
Lily stepped closer to you, her presence steady, constant.
“Then he doesn’t,” she said simply. “If he doesn’t care, then... then you’ll be no worse off than you are now, My Lady. But know this: no other woman is taking him from you. He’s already yours. That’s settled.”
Her words settled over you like a weight.
He was already yours.
There was no escaping the finality of it, the truth in her calm tone.
The idea that you didn’t need to chase after him, that he was already tied to you in ways you couldn’t control, both unsettled and reassured you.
“I’m not even sure I want him, though,” you murmured, the words tumbling out before you could stop them. “I don’t even know what this is. What if I’m just... confused? What if it’s just... attachment? I mean, he’s always there, he’s my betrothed, but- he’s not-”
“Stop,” Lily’s voice sliced through your spiraling thoughts. “You don’t need to understand it all right now. You don’t need to be sure of your feelings just because you’ve realized them.”
You took a slow breath, your chest tight as you tried to keep your composure.
Her words were soothing in their simplicity, but they didn’t change your feelings. “I just... I don’t know what to do with all this. It’s too much. Too fast. I can’t keep up.”
You let the words hang in the air, unsure if you were speaking to her or to yourself.
Lily gave you a small, understanding smile, though it was tinged with a trace of amusement.
She didn’t speak for a moment, as though carefully weighing her response. “Then take it slow, my Lady. You’re allowed to feel all of this, in your own time. You don’t have to rush to make sense of it. No one’s going to force you to figure it out on anyone else’s schedule.”
A tiny sense of relief swept over you, but the knot in your stomach still refused to loosen.
You glanced at the door, as though the mere idea of being near Max would send everything crashing down again.
“So... you’re saying I can avoid him... for a while?”
Lily raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed with the suggestion. “Avoid him?” she repeated, the edge of disbelief creeping into her voice. “My Lady, if I may-"
“But I can?” you pressed, cutting her off, eyes wide with urgency. “You said I could take my time, right? Well, avoiding him sounds like taking my time to me.”
Lily sighed, the sound long and heavy, as though you were testing her patience. “Yes, My Lady, your free will does indeed allow you to avoid him, if that’s truly what you wish.”
A spark of triumph flickered inside you.
“Perfect.” You stood straighter, a plan forming in your mind. “Call for Sir Lando and Sir Oscar.”
Lily’s eyebrows furrowed as she eyed you suspiciously. “What for, My Lady?”
You gave her an almost manic grin, feeling the tension in your shoulders ease slightly as your plan took shape. “They’re going to help me.”
“Help you... with avoiding your betrothed?” Lily asked slowly, a hint of disbelief creeping into her voice. She crossed her arms, studying you with a bemused expression.
“Yes,” you replied firmly, not an ounce of hesitation in your voice. “They’ll help me stay away from him. They’ll distract him, tell him I’m busy with... other things.”
Lily opened her mouth to respond but stopped herself, narrowing her eyes at you as if you had just suggested something ludicrous.
“My Lady,” she said, her voice dipping into a tone of mild reproach, “I must say, I don’t think that’s the most productive course of action.”
“Oh, please.” You threw your hands up dramatically. “I’m just trying to buy myself some time here. I can’t face him, not with these... feelings…whatever they are…bubbling up every time I even think about him. If I can just avoid him for a little while, I can breathe again.”
Lily shook her head, a small, resigned smile playing on her lips. “I don’t think this is the solution you’re looking for, My Lady. But if you insist on this... strategy, I can’t stop you.”
You raised an eyebrow, suddenly intrigued by the shift in her tone. “You can stop me, can’t you? You’re my lady’s maid. You’re supposed to stop me from making poor decisions.”
Lily raised an eyebrow right back at you. “I’m also supposed to help you navigate poor decisions, not prevent them entirely. And right now, this is just one of many decisions I’m going to let you make on your own.”
She paused, eyeing you carefully. “But just know, avoiding him isn’t going to give you the answers you need. It’ll only prolong the inevitable.”
You smiled sweetly, still not convinced. “Sometimes, a little delay is exactly what I need. Besides, it’s not like he’s going anywhere. We’re betrothed, after all.”
“That you are,” Lily replied, her tone becoming slightly sharper. “Which is exactly why you shouldn’t be avoiding him. You’ve got time, but you also have a responsibility to work through your feelings. Even if it’s uncomfortable.”
You glanced toward the door, already plotting the next phase of your plan. “I’ll figure it out. But in the meantime, I’m going to need some assistance.”
Lily sighed again, louder this time.
She didn’t speak for a long moment, her gaze flicking to the door as though she were silently debating whether or not to humor you.
Finally, she gave a small nod. “Very well. I’ll fetch Sir Lando and Sir Oscar. But I’m warning you, My Lady, this avoidance strategy won’t last long.”
You grinned triumphantly as she turned to leave. “Thank you, Lily. You’re the best.”
As she stepped out of the room, you sank back into your chair, letting your mind wander to the next step of your plan.
You weren’t entirely sure what you were doing, but it felt better than facing Max and trying to make sense of the chaos swirling inside you.
For now, avoiding him was the only option that seemed remotely manageable.
When Lily returned with your knights, they each looked at you with varying degrees of confusion and amusement, but you gave them a firm, confident look.
This plan was going to work.
You could make it work.
“Alright,” you said, standing tall, as though the sheer gravity of your decision had transformed you into a seasoned military strategist. “Here’s the plan. We’re going to make sure Max never sees me again.”
A pause hung in the air, heavy and expectant.
“Or at least… not for a while.”
Lando and Oscar exchanged a glance. Lando’s lips twitched upward, the beginnings of a grin playing at the corners of his mouth, while Oscar’s furrowed brow and pursed lips betrayed his confusion.
“Right,” Lando said finally, leaning back and crossing his arms. His tone was equal parts incredulous and amused. “This ought to be good. What, exactly, do you want us to do, my Lady? This sounds like it’s going to be excellent for my boredom.”
Oscar’s expression tightened further. “You can’t be serious,” he muttered, half to himself, his arms now folded.
You straightened your back, summoning all the confidence you could muster. “I am entirely serious. From this moment forward, I have suddenly become… extremely busy.”
Oscar blinked. “Busy,” he repeated flatly.
“Yes, busy,” you replied, the words tumbling out with an exaggerated air of importance. “So busy, in fact, that I won’t have a single moment to spare. And I need you two to help make sure that’s… believable.”
Lando arched an eyebrow, a grin now fully blossoming on his face. “Wait, let me get this straight. You want us to..what? Fabricate your life for a bit?”
“Exactly,” you said with a flourish of your hand, as though the absurdity of your request was irrelevant. “A little misdirection here, a well-timed excuse there. Between the two of you, I’m sure you can come up with something convincing.”
Lando let out a low whistle, shaking his head in mock disbelief. “So, you’re asking us to keep Max, the man who has been running this house like a clock, distracted? To throw him off the scent entirely?”
“Precisely,” you said, lifting your chin.
Oscar looked less amused and more concerned, his practical nature coming to the forefront. “And what exactly is this plan supposed to achieve? You think if we keep him occupied for long enough, he’ll just… forget about you? You do realize who we’re talking about, right?”
“I don’t need him to forget,” you replied quickly, your voice rising slightly in pitch. “I just need him to be… preoccupied. Thoroughly distracted. He can’t be allowed to think about me, let alone come looking for me.”
Lando, who had been quietly observing, suddenly burst out laughing. “This is incredible. You’re trying to dodge the one man who could probably find you in his sleep.”
Oscar sighed again after a moment , clearly reluctant. “Fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Excellent,” you said, clapping your hands together. “Now, let’s get to work.”
As Lando leaned back in his chair, still grinning, and Oscar reluctantly nodded his agreement, you couldn’t help but feel a surge of triumph. Surely, this would work. How hard could it be to outmaneuver Max Emilian Verstappen?
You tried to ignore the nagging voice in the back of your mind whispering that you might have just made a very, very big mistake.
—-
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heartthrobin · 9 months ago
Text
all's fair in love and war (2)
oliver wood x female!reader
wc: 7.87k
warnings: enemies to lovers, still so damn much pining, set in poa, timeline is a bit wonky, limited use of y/n, archie being my fav oc, cheese fest
an: literally fell asleep on my laptop last night editing this, i was so exhausted from school so i’m sorry it’s late !!! but i had the most fun in the world writing this and i hope everyone enjoys :)) don't forget to comment and repost your favourite writers
summary: Oliver is still impossibly miserable, maybe more uncooperative than before, except now when you look at him: you can't think of much else beyond how sweet his lips tasted.
part one
You can’t sleep.
You're not sure you'll find sleep ever again.
“I knew it, I knew it—“ Cherry had bounced the whole way to your dormitory, howling into your ear. “I knew it!”
The image of Oliver’s fluttering eyes swum around your brain as you blinked into the darkness of the poster bed. The taste of his tongue and his words still right against your lips.
It was a riddle of a calibre that you can’t seem to detangle. More than anything, you try to remember how strong has he tasted of Firewhisky - was he so drunk to really dismiss it to nothing at all?
You lingered on it all weekend.
Cherry didn’t help at all — he’s been in love with you forever, that’s literally so obvious — and Enzo even less so once he’d been filled in: Oliver doesn’t seem a bloke who let’s alcohol make his decisions for him, something about Scottish genetics I think.
The interaction plagued you: digging a wide hole in the base of your stomach. You mourned the thought that you may never have the opportunity to kiss those soft lips again, more than anything: preparing yourself for the feud between yourselves to worsen.
There’s barely enough time to make sense of your situation before you’re racing down over the grassy hills of the grounds, bag swinging violently over your shoulder and extraordinarily late for your Herbology lesson in the greenhouse.
Your morning alarm had rung right into one ear and out the other, a product of the tossing and turning you’d been doing for the last two nights.
When you swing the greenhouse door open, panting and face flush from the beating sun, the whole room turns to you. Sprout pauses where her hands are flailing in explanation.
“Sorry I’m late professor,” you wheeze, readjusting your strap over your shoulder.
Cherry is smirking at you from her bench, sidled up with Jane Emmet.
It hadn’t escaped you that you’d be sharing the lesson with the Gryffindors, but you’d precious little time to worry about it in the five minutes you had to pull a robe over your head and stick a toothbrush into your mouth.
Your eyes are purposeful in not looking over the room. Scared to catch the wrong eyes.
“Not a problem peach, we’re just repotting some Fire-Seed Bushes.” She brings a stubby hand to her chin, “uhm … well, Mr Kumar there in the corner doesn’t have a partner. Go join him by his pots.”
Archie has a lopsided smile on his face when you approach, a thick black curl drooping over his left eye.
“Hey.” He nudges gently.
You set your bag down and grab a pair of gloves, chuckling. “Hey Archie.”
The soil is warm when you stick your fingers into the dirt, shifting it gently enough not to mess over the edge of the bucket. There’s a Fire-Seed Bush sitting tentatively at the end of the bench, spitting sparks and emitting smoke.
“So …” Archie speaks first, the back of his hand bumping yours between the black soil. “How was your weekend?”
It’s a veiled question, a poorly veiled one at that. The question draws a laugh from the base of your stomach.
You shrug, adamant on missing the point. “It was alright, I guess. How about yours?”
He shrugs right back. “Wasn’t the greatest. Penelope Clearwater rejected me for Percy Weasley.”
You don't mean to, you really don't, but it draws another bout of laughter out of you - you clap your hand over your mouth. “I’m sorry—“
“No, I get it. Percy bloody Weasley?” His brow is creased, dirt-stained hands rising messily from the soil to swipe at a fallen piece of hair in his face. “Dead sure that bloke's own mother can't say he’s handsome. I’m better looking than him, surely?”
There’s the hanging insinuation that it was rhetorical, but you reply anyways: “you’re definitely more handsome than Percy Weasley, Archie.”
His head cocks down at you, stained paws finding his waist and pressing black fingerprints into the red jumper. “You really think so?”
“Without a doubt.”
Archie smiles, bumping your side against his. You think he might be blushing. “You’re very charming. I understand what Oliver sees in you.”
You jolt involuntarily, spilling some black soil over the edge of the pot.
Swiping at the mess lazily, you play the comment off with another crumbly chuckle: hoping it convinces him more than it does yourself. “Oliver sees in me what a bull sees in a red cape.”
Archie’s reaching timidly for the Fire-Seed Bush, lifting it off the counter and holding the dangerous botanical at arm’s length. “Not true. The boy’s half in love with you.”
This conversation is getting awfully uncomfortable awfully quickly. It picks at your curiosity nonetheless.
“He said that?”
He’s quick to shake off the question, eyes still trained on setting the roots of the bush into the gap in the soil. “Oliver doesn’t have to say anything. He spends practically every fucking mealtime mooning over at your table, and he talks about you way more than necessary—“
“That’s just because I work on his nerves. Oliver doesn’t love me, he barely tolerates me.”
The boy turns on you, confusion set in his brow. “Why is this news? Last I saw you, your tongue was halfway into his stomach.”
Zachariah Smith and his Gryffindor partner look up at that. Your face goes hot all over - Archie doesn’t seem to notice.
“We were drunk.” You say softly, eyes stuck on a loose leaf crackling against the wooden counter.
There’s a special kind of fear that's crawling into your heart where you stand. The fear of putting too much faith into the words of Archie Kumar.
That it’s an elaborate ruse. A set-up, canons of confetti and a banner screaming “you’ve been fooled!” if you were to indulge his words. The danger of allowing your mind to drift too far off into the possibilities of a world wherein Oliver Wood doesn’t hate you - at least not as much as he lets on.
Archie looks at you out the side of his eye, you can feel it, but says nothing. He hands you a miniature yellow-handled spade.
Instead you fill the space. "I heard Isla Flynn has a crush on you."
He perks: "really?"
Across the room, Oliver is bumping elbows with Poppy Davis.
"Ow!"
A loose spark has evidently landed on her exposed arm. The sparks that Oliver was supposed to be watching for, the ones that he is intent on ignoring with the constant glancing back over his shoulder to where you and his best mate are in the corner of the room fucking giggling at each other like toddlers with a box of matches.
“Oliver — can you just focus for five seconds!” Poppy isn’t impressed.
Oliver isn’t either, with the situation as a whole. The pads of his fingers are blistered from the repotting of the bush and Poppy’s careless bumps and his general indifference to the task at hand.
It eats at his brain. What are you guys talking about? Is it about him?
You laugh again and it’s loud enough that it draws his shoulders all the way taut. There’s another snap of a spark and Oliver feels where it lands at his wrist, but he doesn’t react.
“Just pass me the bloody spade.” He grumbles.
-
The lesson passes more slowly than Oliver could swim shoulder-deep through molasses.
It feels like years later when he tosses his gloves into the box with the rest, when the class shuffles to return tools and begin slinging half-open bags over their shoulders.
Oliver doesn’t think he’s ever packed up faster - Poppy is still scowling at him, he doesn’t care - before he’s knocking through yellow and red tied students to find Archie’s head of curly black hair.
“Hey!” He catches him by the wrist, tugging on it like a dog with a bone. Archie jumps, eyes winding down to find his friend. “What did she say?”
You’re far ahead, Oliver can make out the back of your head: hips bumping with Cherry’s up the hill towards the castle.
Archie grins. “She said Isla Flynn has a crush on me.”
Oliver groans, “Not about that, you prat. About— wait, really?”
"Yeah!" He hikes his bag higher on his shoulder. "Can you believe it? She's got that hot Irish accent and everything."
Oliver nods, "Yeah ... yeah. Good on you, mate."
He's trying desperately not to steal this moment from his best friend, but he's fucking itching to know what else you and Archie had been giggling about.
"Did she ... say anything else?" He presses, more gently than his character usually allows. "Like about me?"
Archie shrugs without looking down. "I asked her, but she seemed tense about the whole thing."
"Tense?"
"Yeah, she said something about a bull and a cape, and went like all quiet when I told her you like her--"
At that, Oliver's stomach leaps up into his throat. He grabs his best friend by the arm, jolting him to a short stop. Some Hufflepuff bumps into their halted figures, grumbling before shuffling around them.
"You told her what?" His eyes flare erratically.
Archie shrugs, an innocuously confused look painting his features. "Well I said Oliver's half in love with you, or something like that and she looked all confused about it--"
Oliver's grip on his friend's wrist tightened to a degree that a ring was sure to form on his dark skin. "You fucking pinhead! You told her I liked her?"
Pulling his arm violently from his grip, Archie has the nerve to look affronted. "You don't?"
The morning sun shining over Oliver's head feels like it's growing hotter by the second, there's a dribble of sweat running down his spine.
"That's -- that's not the point. Even if I do, which I'm not saying is the case, she doesn't need to know that."
"Were you two obliviated in your sleep last night?" Archie's eyebrows are pressed down against his eyes, slouching down to meet his friend's face. "I caught you two making out like the world was ending less than three days ago! Surely she has to figure that you feeling something for her, she's not stupid."
Oliver struggles between his thoughts, worse around his words. "That was ... we'd been drinking. For all I know, she only kissed me back cause she was trollied off Dragon-Barrell--"
"She said that, too."
Eyeing him, Oliver's hands find his hips. "Said what, exactly?"
"That you were drunk, I mentioned the kiss and she said we were drunk."
A sensation he can only identify as closest to guilt seeps up into Oliver's chest from his stomach. "She thinks I kissed her just cause I was drunk?"
Archie's hand finds Oliver's shoulder. "You should probably talk to her, mate."
He sighs, eyes drifting over the silhouette of the castle in the distance. He shakes his head like it'll rattle the plaguing thoughts loose. "We're gonna be late for Transfig."
-
"I mean, Archie is his best friend." Cherry is trying to rationalise the whole story. "I don't see why he'd lie about it?"
You shake your head, knocking shoulders with a Ravenclaw girl trying to pass through the corridor. "I'm not entertaining it, Cherry."
"Come on," she sighs, practically skipping to keep up with the furious pace you've set. "Would it be so terrible if he likes you?"
"Yes." You don't look at her.
The redhead's eye-roll is practically audible, "Let me rephrase, would it be so terrible if he likes you back?"
You meet her eyes for the first time since you'd entered the corridor.
She sighs, "we're gonna see him in Muggle Studies in five minutes. I think you should say something."
"Forget I said anything, Cherry." Heat flares at your neck again, prompted by the embarrassment of even imagining how such a conversation might go.
The rest of the walk is quiet, but you feel Cherry's gaze warming the side of your face.
Burbage's classroom is over-populated with Gryffindors by the time you drop your bag against the marbled floor beside your desk. In the corner of your eye, your brain has already fixated on Oliver's silhouette leaned against the edge of his own desk. You flush hot all over again, as if your thoughts were transcribing into subtitles and floating above your head for the whole class to read.
The click of Burbage's heels prompt the lingering students to find their seats, "Please take out your copies of Muggle Wars: Cause and Effect. We left off on page eighty-seven--"
You suddenly regret snapping at Cherry. Wishing for the comfort of her presence, your eyes glazing over where she's perched in the first row of desks closest to the chalkboard.
Unusually, the class trickles on without disruption. There's a few glances over at your direction, like everyone is waiting for another outburst from the grade's most volatile duo. They're sure to be let down, you're adamant to not even breathe in the direction of Wood.
Burbage comments on it, too, nearly ten minutes from the bell.
"It's suspiciously quiet in your corner today, captains." she looks down through her fingerprint-smudged frames, brushing over you and then Wood three seats away. "Something the matter?"
You shrug, refusing to acknowledge the boy. He seems to be doing the same: completely unfairly, the thought that he wouldn't look at you made the hair on your arms stand straight. "We can start up if you'd like, professor?"
Her face contorts into that irritated look that you'd grown accustomed to when Professor Burbage addresses you. "You're flirting dangerously with another session of detention, miss."
"She's just answering your question, professor."
Nobody in the class seemed more surprised than Burbage, although that in itself was a feat. The two Gryffindor boys in the row ahead of you swivel all the way around in their seats to look at Oliver, who'd just spoken.
You fight the twitching urge to look at him.
"Detention for two, it seems. I'll be seeing you both Friday afternoon."
A calm air settles again over the class, as if order had been restored. You and Wood had lost the interest of the room and students shift back to the board where WHAT IS A PRIME MINISTER? is sprawled across it in chicken-scratch handwriting.
Sighing, your eyes find the clock against the wall. Eight minutes left.
You pick at the end of your quill irritably: electing to dip it into the ink at the edge of the desk and entertain yourself quietly by drawing a miniature snowman at the corner of your page, trying not to think about another Friday afternoon in too close of a proximity to Oliver Wood. There's a soft whir, barely audible if you weren't so focused on outlining pebble eyes, and a tiny paper-airplane whizzes quietly from under your desk: landing squarely on the nose-less head of your snowman.
Fear prickles at you. You don't look up for the source, lest a suspicious sideways glance earns you another weekend with the party-animal Charity Burbage.
Instead, you carefully undo the intricately folded wings of the plane. It's barely big enough to fit into your palm once open, the top of the little note marked in black ink.
It was the same handwriting that marked the sign-out sheet for equipment in the Quidditch storage rooms down at the pitch.
'Thanks for that one, smart-mouth.'
Your eyes flicker up to Burbage, who's back is turned, before you dip your quill into the ink and scribble out a response. In your peripheral, Oliver is leaned back in his stool: biceps folded over each other. There's an unexplainably airy-fairy, fuzzy feeling warming your rib cavity.
'Believe this one was your fault, dickhead.'
You quietly refold the creased edges, before tapping it lightly with the end of your wand: then watch how it takes off the airstrip of your page and zips quietly under the cover of desks to land back in front of the sender.
There's a long pause - enough for Burbage to draw out a whole flow diagram of something called "parliament" - before the edge of the paper wing grazes at your calf again. It lands quietly again.
'Maybe.
We good?'
There's a gentleness to the sentence. Like you can hear it from Oliver's mouth, like he's avoiding your gaze when he whispers it.
You hunch over the note again.
Oliver's knuckles are turning white, twisting his wand in his hands under the table. He shouldn't have said anything. He's regretting the whole fucking idea of the stupid paper-plane now.
He's trying not to watch you write, not to notice how long you stared at his writing before you picked up your own quill. He does anyways.
When the airplane flutters down into his palm, Burbage is already excusing the class. Stools are scraping against cold tile, the clutter of textbooks being crammed back into bags.
'Never :)'
His eyes run over the word once, twice, three times over. A smile is tugging at the edge of his lip, he forces it taut - but his eyes are still shining unusually brightly when Archie knocks his shoulder to his.
"What you looking so damn happy about?"
Oliver tucks the note into the pocket of his robes. "Don’t know what yer talking about."
-
"But professor, why can't Hufflepuff take Saturday?"
"Well, Hufflepuff already gave up our practice days for Gryff--!"
Hooch sighed so deeply she almost melted back into her armchair. "The decision is made, Oliver. The pitch is being cleaned out on Wednesday, your team can take Saturday for any extra training."
He could practically hear the smile creeping onto your face, the smug crossed-arm look he'll no doubt find when he turns to you.
Irritation bubbles up in his throat, a familiar companion in your presence, and just as he prophesied: you are grinning.
In the weeks that followed that day in Burbage's class, it seemed that both parties decided that the topic of their shared kiss outside the Ravenclaw common room was best left undiscussed.
The arrangement is working. At least Oliver thinks so.
You still bait him and he still snaps, rising to your taunts. He still finds himself in detention more Fridays than he spends free, and his body ripples with anger when you roll your eyes at him.
But it was in moments, like this now, where your little self-satisfied grin doesn't quite vex him to the degree it once did. It's now harder to find a retort, to snap at you with a sharp-edged comment. Not when amusement crinkles at the corners of your eyes where your black lashes kiss so prettily.
Hooch swivels in her chair to find a document between one of her cluttered drawers, you take the opportunity to stick the tip of your tongue out childishly at him.
Oliver draws a tight breath, he hopes his face is still taut in annoyance, because his heart has slipped like a stone down into his stomach. That's the other issue, the tiny little obstacle in these recent weeks: he can't stop looking at your mouth. It's distracting, disarming - paralysing at the best of times.
He strips his gaze away, before he can be outed by anyone in the room. "Whatever." He mumbles.
You seem disappointed in his lack of a real response, but it passes quickly - like a shadow - over your face.
"Thanks professor." You grab up your roster from her desk and turn to the door, practically skipping out into the corridor.
He huffs.
Somehow, you and Archie have become fast friends. Mornings around Fire-Seed Bushes and Venomous Tentaculas in the heat of Greenhouse Three seems to do wonders for a friendship.
It prickles at Oliver's nerves when you pass in the corridors, when you perk up with a high "hey Arch!" and he grins down from his towering height right back at you: "hey Y/n!"
You don't look at Oliver. He's notably sour the rest of the walk.
Alright, maybe the whole arrangement wasn't really working. You were a distraction to him before, no doubt, but somehow your powers of beguilement had tripled. Especially since you seem to be behaving perfectly normal: like you hadn't given Oliver the best snog of his life outside the Ravenclaw common room that night.
Maybe it was just alcohol, maybe he is the only one plagued by the knowledge of the other's taste.
The castle has turned impossibly colder, the bitter bite of winter stinging at the loose cuffs of his robes on walkthroughs of the corridors. He can't imagine how cold the air above the pitch is going to be on Sunday when Hufflepuff faces off Slytherin for a spot in the finals.
It's all Hooch has been going on about for the last two weeks.
Oliver's had to shift around at least four practices - Roger almost twice as much, he's a pushover - to allow for you and Marcus to have more time on the pitch. His complaints fell on deaf ears, Hooch dismissed him with a wave of her bony hand and a "your time is coming, Wood."
You prance into dinner late most evenings, hair in every direction and face flush with sweat: sticking it out like a bumblebee in those awful yellow quidditch robes.
Oliver only notices because, annoyingly, he's found that he is frequenting the bench at the Gryffindor table that faces over to the Hufflepuff's. His eyes drift over the yellow-tied heads to where you clump up with Enzo and Cherry, watches you talk around mouthfuls of toast lazily, giggle behind your napkin: head rolling back to showcase that smooth neck, how it runs down to the soft slopes of your shoulders: disappearing down into your button-up.
Archie has noticed, he's sure, but hasn't done more but allude to it with teasing glances or suggestive comments.
"The Hufflepuffs up to something particularly interesting over there, Ollie?"
The speed with which Oliver's eyes snap to his peas is almost comical. He shrugs and mumbles like a child. "Don't know."
-
On Sunday morning, you don't go to breakfast.
There's an uncomfortable gurgling in your midriff, like a snake is slithering between your organs and you're sure even just the smell of eggs on toast would bring up your dinner.
Instead you find yourself at the pitch a whole hour before the game is set to start. Marcus is running laps around the grass, something he's done since you've known him.
He offers a curt wave, face set like cold stone.
It reminds you of Oliver a little bit, the distraction in his eyes.
Oliver is never all the way there, wherever he is, you think. His eyes mist over like he's halfway between this world and another. You know it's Quidditch: he dreams it, eats it, sleeps it.
But lately he's foggier than usual.
You think it's your imagination, brush off the idea as you have all the millions of others you'd had in the preceding weeks about the surly brute that was Oliver Wood. He plagues you.
Just the vibrato of his unimpressed huff when you get your way, when you quip something purposely annoying at him. It's addictive, the feel of his sugar-brown eyes glaring a hole through you.
Lately, his reactions have been closer to underwhelming. Allowing for only a moment of eye contact: gone are the quick-witted retorts, the Scottish-laced "princess" usually attached. The thought makes you wince in embarrassment, knowing that you've been pressing him harder lately: like a seven-year old jabbing at a claw machine, outwardly desperate for that brown plushy on the top of the pile.
Maybe he's over it. So deathly mortified of your shared kiss that he doesn't want to know you anymore, much less take the effort to hate you. Your chest pinches tightly.
You dress into your match robes slowly, taking your time with the loops of your shoelaces and the buttons down the sweater you're wearing underneath everything. Oliver Wood should be at the bottom of your list of priorities, normally, but now more than ever.
The team filters into the change-room, exhibiting varying degrees of nervousness. Cedric is practically green, but Herbert looks like he's about to go down a water-slide he's waited over an hour in line for. Beyond the swinging doors, you can hear the crowd shuffling loudly into their seats.
Before your wits are completely about you, Hooch is rapping on those same doors. "Onto the pitch, Hufflepuffs!"
You muster up your best excuse for a captain's speech for what might be the last match you ever play as one. The team seem satisfied, you figure it's easy to find solace before a game when you know it's not your last. As the only seventh year, comfort doesn't come so easily to you.
The crowd is deafening when yellow robes take to the sky: Marcus looks over, offering another nod, not unlike the one he'd given you earlier. You can tell he's feeling the dread of finality too.
There's a whistle blow and the quaffle flies past your face with a speed that nearly evacuates your nose from your face. Lee is announcing in the distance and the rumble of adrenaline forces your fingers over the handle. It tilts and you dip, disappearing into the sky of players.
-
The winter air at Hogwarts was biting enough roaming the corridors, but thirty metres off the ground is something wholly unnatural. Your face was burning crisp from the icy wind, the feeling in your cheeks and nose lost to the Scottish cold.
Foggy white clouds puff out with each heavy breath. Cedric zooms past and Jane loops around his moving figure to knock a stray bludger in the opposite direction.
Your eyes flash between them and the fast approaching Malcolm, he tosses the quaffle at you with a grunt and you catch it at the tips of slippery, ice-frozen fingertips.
Shooting forward again, you duck under Marcus who is hurtling through the sky at you: gone is the look of friendly fondness from his eyes, replaced with a hunger for the leather-bound ball in your grasp.
Just missing the grasp of his meaty hand, the ball passes onto Heidi.
"Another ten points to Hufflepuff," Lee's voice echoes as if from heaven. "That brings the score to ninety for Hufflepuff and eighty for Slytherin!"
It's been nearly ninety-five minutes of sitting on your broom growing colder, and you're not alone.
Around you, the team is descending into frost-induced exhaustion: Jane's nose is as bright red as a Christmas ornament and Cedric has been peeping over the top of his thick woollen-scarf for at least the last half - barely enough to catch a glance of the whizzing canary and emerald robes, much less of a tiny golden snitch.
You sigh out another white breath, letting your eyes drift over the stands. It's saturated with moving heads of faces you can't make out and yellow and green swaying banners. Your gaze lingers on the top left, in the corner facing the castle. It's where Cherry and Enzo park themselves during every match, where you know they're screaming in support, clenching their teeth at every quaffle handover. You can feel them, even when their faces blur into the crowd.
Unintentionally, you think about how Oliver's mixed in there too. Somewhere between your peers. If you had been granted another moment, if the quaffle wasn't mid-air between two Slytherins just under your nose and you'd not taken the opportunity to snatch it from them, you would have meandered into the trap of hoping that deep down in his chest - even if it was core of the earth deep - he was rooting for you, too. That he seethed at a missed goal or clenched a tight fist at his side in celebration when a Hufflepuff makes a beautiful play.
Meanwhile in the stands, Oliver has decided that the desire to play his allegiances in secret has since disappeared from his heart.
He'd played it light in the first few minutes. Mumbling under his breath at a fumbled pass or a slimy move from the Slytherins, but by the forty-fifth minute he'd found himself on his feet.
"Diggory!" His hands waved in front of him, "it was right there you fucking git--"
A Hufflepuff third year a row ahead looked at him askew, but he paid her no mind.
Archie had taken the hint early. As soon as Oliver was out of his seat, so was he. Despite being Oliver Wood's best friend, Archie had somewhat limited knowledge of the game himself and eyed Oliver's reactions to find the appropriate moments to whoop and cheer. Oliver didn't say anything, but he appreciated it more than he could verbalise.
His eyes tracked you more than anything, when you were flying between players or just floating in place: eyes like a hawk, watching over the game. His heart swelled and his pride fell to the wayside.
Just short of the two hour mark, there was a rise in the crowd.
"The seekers have caught sight of the snitch!"
Oliver's stomach rose into his throat.
"They're diving for it, Malfoy and Diggory head to head-- and Slytherin grabs the snitch, winning by 140 points!"
It sank back into place, like a stone to the bottom of the river. He watched how you froze, how you twisted over your shoulder to find Diggory's figure lingering at the bottom of the field. You shoulders sagged, hanging in the air as the others dropped to the ground.
"Slytherin have made it into the finals against Gryffindor for the quidditch cup, back here at the pitch next month!"
After a long moment, the last in the sky, you followed them down.
The raucous cheers from the Slytherins were hard to drown out, he wasn't even sure Archie heard him toss a "i'll find you at the castle" before he found himself pushing through the masses of people.
He fought against the wave moving to find the stairs, eager to return to the warmth of their dormitories, but Oliver was markedly more motivated than the majority. He stomped on some toes and nearly tossed a first year off the stands to race down the stairs.
Only once his feet had found the mushy grass of the pitch, did he pause to consider that he wasn't entirely sure what he was going to say. What was the rush for? To comfort you, tease you for your loss?
The latter option was definitely what he could do, what he could say. What was expected of him, if he was being honest. Recently, however, he's found it harder and harder to come up with remarks to hurt your feelings. Found that he quite prefers that little smile that tucks into the corner of your mouth when he says something unexpectedly fond. How your eyes practically gleam.
There's shoving from all sides of him -- get out the way, bloody hell -- and the teams pass ahead of him. Leading the march, despite it being nothing more than a slow trudge, is your figure: squashed between those of who he recognises to be Cherry Stretton and Enzo Musa's.
Their arms wrapped over your shoulders, talking animatedly into your ear on each side. Enzo tips his head to meet yours, a small touch of comfort.
Oliver sighs. He has nothing to say and no comfort to offer, wondering for a moment what he could possibly bare to hear in his own final moments as captain. He thinks that anything from your mouth would work.
So he waits, parks himself beside the stairs and waits for Archie: watching the six-legged figure disappear up over the hill.
-
You're not at dinner.
He knows because he's been watching the door for the better half of an hour. Archie pushes his plate at him, "Eat something there, Ollie."
Begrudgingly, Oliver brings his drumstick up to his mouth. "She's not eaten a thing since breakfast, it's almost eight."
Archie passes a sympathetic look over him. "Her friends are here, I'm sure she'll be by soon. There's no use you joining her on a hunger-strike."
He's right. Cherry and Enzo and some others that frequent your circle are talking around the table, around the spot that you usually fill. But dinner goes on and students leak steadily out towards bed without your return.
Eventually Oliver huffs, like an irritated bulldog, and grabs for the nearest napkin: unfolding it out in front of him.
"What are you doing?" Archie asks thickly, spitting bits of rice at him.
Oliver reaches for two chicken skewers, placing them neatly on the white square: alongside a dinner roll and a pumpkin pasty.
He wraps them over, double wraps it with another napkin too.
"What does it look like, Arch."
Placing it carefully into the deep pocket of his robe, Oliver goes to stand - lacking the patience it takes for Archie to answer, or for his inevitable teasing. "I'll find you back in our room."
He's halfway out the hall when Archie's voice calls out to him, "You don't even know where she is!"
Oliver shakes his head, brandishing a dismissive hand over his shoulder. "I know where she is." He mumbles for only himself to hear.
-
You’d watched close to twenty-one quidditch matches from the stands at the pitch on Hogwarts grounds: played in almost half of them. 
The seat is still slightly too small, just uncomfortable enough to make a person shuffle. Beyond the rim over the other end of the pitch you can see the orange sun dipping behind the horizon, drawing to darkness over your moment alone.
By now you're sure the party in the common room has long since found momentum. The one you'd been promised by the team, "it's your last game, cap, we need to celebrate!". You're sure someone somewhere is looking for you, bracing a plastic cup of Firewhisky with your name on it, but you can't find it within yourself to face it all just yet.
The silence of the evening is enough, you only wish you'd been fast enough to retrieve your broomstick that's somewhere off with Enzo. Just for one last lap.
The serenity of your loneliness doesn't persevere, however. You can hear shuffling up the steps, you're tempted to look but the sunset is slipping so quickly out of your hands that it's not worth the time wasted.
It's only when the footfalls draw closer, stopping when a body slumps into the seat beside you. The seats are so cramped that his knee brushes yours, the figure long since identified from the corner of your eye.
"Come to gloat?" You ask, eyes never leaving the sky.
He shrugs. "Not today."
You nod. His smell drifts on the breeze under your nose, like peppermint and soap and Oliver.
There's a long silence. Your robes crease against the fist sitting in your lap, you've yet to change out of your quidditch uniform, you know it will be the last time.
"You missed dinner."
"Does it matter?"
Despite your avoidant gaze, Oliver's is warming the side of your face. The evening air cools the same spot.
There's a shuffling that finally draws your eyes. Oliver is still in his robes too, and his hand emerges from a deep pocket with a folded napkin square. "Figured you'd be hungry."
He places it onto your lap with a gentleness you're coming to find more of in him. Something frighteningly warm erupts in your chest and your hands come up to it, pulling apart the napkin to find picky bits inside.
You're fighting between smiling and starting to cry. You do neither.
"You carried this in your pocket the whole way from the hall?"
His eyes flicker between the food and your face before he shrugs. "Yeah."
By now, you were fighting a losing battle and the smile pulled up at the ends of your mouth so tightly that your cheeks started to hurt. "Gross."
You pick up a chicken skewer regardless, biting into it and facing the sky again. You offer him the other one and he looks for a moment like he's going to argue but takes it quietly in the end.
The chicken is tender and only after you'd swallowed the first bit did you realise how hungry you'd actually been. You finish it without a word, going to tear the pasty in half and offering a piece to your companion.
You're picking at the roll now, tearing tiny bits off and feeding it piece by piece to yourself like a bird. "Last game."
He nods. "I know."
"What could someone say to you after your last game, Wood?" You pick at him, eyes flittering between him and the now nearly black sky. "You know, to make you feel better?"
Oliver shakes his head, leaning back and rolling his shoulders: as if the thought itself unsettled him.
"Nothing, probably. I'd probably just walk into the Black Lake and drown myself."
You think he's joking, but with Oliver Wood that was hardly a sure thing.
"You wouldn't."
"What's there left to live for?" He says it with an airy chuckle.
Shrugging, your head falls against your shoulder. "You'd have to figure it out, because I'd go marching in right after you. Carry you out if I had to."
Oliver stills, eyes wide and blinking at you. Your chest goes tight, the ghost of a smile pressing at your face.
"Bridal style and everything ..." You add quietly, stifling your chuckle.
He seems to come back to himself, nodding. "We should get back. Been a long day."
The napkin crumples in your hand, shoved down into the depths of your own pocket. You walk ahead, the pathway to the steps is only narrow enough for one person at a time, and he trails behind.
By the time you've hit the steps, Oliver moving down beside you, you're brewing around an apology. A way to thin the air, to ease where your chest is tight: swirling around well done, now you've made things awkward you git. It's halfway up to your tongue when skin brushes against the back of your hand.
Warm fingers explore your knuckles to find your cool ones, slipping to knot between them.
You work not to look down, because Oliver's skittish like that. From the corner of your eye, you can see he's concentrating his gaze ahead.
His hand tightens against yours, palm callous from years wrapped around the wooden handle of his broomstick. It's a little sweaty and sticky but you're smiling so hard you're about to be sick.
You dare to look at him, Oliver's smiling too.
-
Oliver hasn't been sleeping.
His last few days of seventh year are slipping like water through his calloused hands and he can feel it. Every hour that passes, shadowy and fleeting.
Classes feel shorter than before, the terrible jokes Archie bombards him with over dinner sound funnier than he ever remembers them being and the glimpses he catches of you in the corridor never feel long enough. The ceiling of his poster bed flashes with moments of the day that's passed, feeling like a dream you'll be jolted out of as soon as it gets good.
Even over all his hours of broody contemplation, none of it makes the final whistle any easier to swallow. It hits him like he's been smacked with a bludger in the chest.
"Gryffindor has won the quidditch cup, two-hundred and thirty points to twenty!"
He can hear the crowd's roar, the whoops of the twins floating somewhere below him. Harry's standing on the grass of the pitch holding up his tiny golden trophy. The pitch is red all over: Oliver won.
He won.
Every moment building up over the last seven years culminated into the final blow of the whistle. The wind is whipping at the hair over his forehead: Oliver thinks this might be the happiest moment of his life, but he's not entirely sure.
He never realised that it would all be so fucking soaked in sadness.
It's over. He's leaving the castle empty handed. His engraving will live on the Quidditch Cup in a dusty cupboard for years to come, yes, and he might have a frame up in his future apartment somewhere, reminiscing on the old days. That's all.
He's struck with the devastating fear that in a few short years, nobody will remember him. More than anything, he can't believe he hadn't come to this overwhelming conclusion before right now. Before Angelina is yelling to him, waving a frantic hand and sporting the biggest grin in all of Scotland, before he was seconds from taking the prize he's held in his mind for so many years into his very hands.
Will you forget him?
It nearly knocks him off his broom. He finds that it scares him the most, more than the thought of the dust-caked trophy or the lonely corner at the back of his cupboard where his Hogwarts robes will no doubt live until eternity.
He won't forget you, he thinks. He knows.
You're just so damn annoying. And beautiful, fucking whip-clever and hilarious sometimes--
The handle of his broom is tilting down to the earth now, the crowd zooming into a blur on either side of him. He hits a shaky landing, broomstick abandoned on the grass behind him as he's pulled into the arms of his team and well-wishers.
A golden trophy passes over the heads of the twins and it's shoved into his sweating hands. It's cool to the touch and so much heavier than he thought it ever could be, but he can't seem to keep his mind on the situation long enough to realise any of that. His mind is racing around the castle wondering where you might be and what's the fastest way to get there.
His eyes are racing over the heads of the roving crowd. "Wood, Wood! Speech!"
Shadowing over everyone is Archie's tall figure standing at the back, grinning down at him. The team watches expectantly.
This is it. The moment for the speech he's been practicing in his bathroom mirror since he was seven.
"I--" he looks down at the cup for the first time, his face reflecting up at him in glimmering gold. He finds he can't remember any of the words. "I need to go find someone."
There's a buzz of confusion, but Oliver doesn't linger: shoving the Quidditch Cup into Harry's arms.
"That's the shortest speech Wood has ever given." He hears Angelina quip, but he can't be arsed to turn. He's already flying, moving through the crowd at such a pace he might just have been on his broom.
The sea of students had long since started moving up to the castle, particularly the non-gryffindors: trying to beat the stampede of scarlet that is no doubt to come. Oliver's legs carry him over the smooth green hill up towards Hogwarts, head craning over students to find your side profile somewhere in the mass.
He catches few oy, watch it!'s and congrats, Wood!'s but he doesn't turn, doesn't stop running. Students bespeckle the grass like ants lining up for crumbs, and he's all the way up into the stone corridor leading to the Great Hall when he spots Cherry's velvet red curls over the crowd, and sure enough, he finds you're knocking her shoulder with your own.
It only takes one shout of your name and you turn to peek curiously back, by which time he's taken both your shoulders into his hands and steered you to the wall of the corridor.
"Wood! What are you do--"
His hands squeeze around the plush at your upper arms. "Oliver. My name is Oliver."
Your eyes are wide in surprise, the window behind you showcases the gardens and the pitch in the distance. Sunlight forms a halo over the crown of your head.
With a head tilted in confusion, you nod slowly. "Alright ... what are you doing, Oliver?"
He can feel the eyes of Cherry and Enzo burning a hole through the side of his head, but doesn't bother with it. You're blinking up at him, gentle and benign in your features. He wonders when it became like this, when you'd lost the tight brow and the frown every time you looked at him.
"I won the Quidditch Cup." He says blankly.
You nod, a small smile tucked into the corner of your lip. "I saw. Congratulations."
Oliver only nods back at you. "I wanted to tell you. I wanted to come shove it in your face."
He's shuffling closer to your figure, and he's more than pleased to discover that you aren't cowering from it.
"Of course you did, because you're a prat." But you're smiling so hard now that it's impossible to take your jab to heart. "Is that all, Oliver?"
A warm sensation is spilling into his rib cavity and his fingertips are buzzing with electricity when they come to find either side of your face.
"No." His forehead is nearly touching yours and your hands have wrapped around his wrists. "I came to ask you out on a date. A sappy, disgustingly romantic date where I bring you flowers and pay for your hot chocolate. You'd hate it."
"That truly sounds horrible." Your smile is so wide he can barely see the whites of your eyes and it pumps more adrenaline through Oliver than any argument you'd ever shared over the last seven years.
"So, is that a yes?"
You're bouncing on your toes a little bit, bumping your nose against Oliver's clumsily. The babble of passing students and gawking onlookers has practically fallen mute to him.
"Depends, are you going to kiss me goodnight after?" You whisper it, like it's a secret between just you and him.
He nods slowly, "pretty desperate to kiss you right now, if I'm being honest princess--"
You don't wait for him to finish, thank Merlin you don't wait for him to finish, and push up onto your toes: crashing against his mouth. You're kiss is as dizzying as he remembers, but softer this time. You kiss like you know he's not running away, hands pressing softly over his neck.
It's nothing like your kiss outside the Ravenclaw common room: where that one was desperate and hot and angry, this time it's born from longing and tenderness and acceptance.
It leaves him just as fucking breathless as the first time.
Somewhere behind him, he hears wolf-whistling (he's sure it's Cherry) and when you pull your lips off his, your face is flush with embarrassment.
"I will go on a date with you, Oliver."
He takes your hand into his, curling his fingers between your own. You lean up to peck him softly and bat your eyelashes at him, grinning innocuously when you whisper: "If you treat me like you did with Delilah, I'm throwing your broomstick into the fireplace."
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