#she just dashes in takes revenge and dashes out again

[actiaslunaris]

Extremely effective.

[drawlody]

My list of Adam ships♡ n my opinion bout them (also fics rec :D)

Adam x Luicfer (Adamsapple/Duitarduck) 10/10

Need i say more:)))??!?! started out as a "haha funny slip-up ship" to "hey they got really good angst potential". The friends/lovers to enemies to lovers is STRONG with this one n i am eating up everything i could found on ao3. Smth bout this macho-ass man finally getting to stay back n not take charge for once feel nice, also princess Adam supermacy wooooo. Whoever came up with the ship name i applaud u cause that's like a 3 layers name(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

It's not an Adamsapple fic without Adam having at least 1 mental breakdown n Lucifer have his guilt eating him alive:)))

Very fucked up torture but i swear it worth the pain:D The dove is so dead it start to rot so plz read the tags properly (plz check out the AngeliaDark other works too they got good shit)

This one have a splits so check out both the fics (beware the author have a skrewed sense of what is considered wholesome:))))

I didnt think a smut scene could be this sad

Adam x Lute (Guitarspear/Guardrock) 10/10

Litteraly my first Hazbin ship, assholes in love is an underrated dynamic we desperately need more off:))) That with a dash of evil dude x loyal subordinate (which i havent seen since the Deathglare days) n opposite attract (look they have one main thing in common is that their extreme bloodthirst, other than that she's stricter than ur mom n he's lazier than the Sloth ring itself but that the beauty of it no? He convince her to chill tf out n not to burst a blood vessel, she keep him on track n make sure Sera dont come on their asses)

They're just being silly enabling each other terrible behaviour n i love that for them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) Litteral besties i tell ya

Heavy non-con shit involving Val but Lute will revenge our boi i promised u that

Cool idea n they r just made for each other damn

First hazbin fic i read which is a really cool smut:D

Adam x Micheal (we need a ship name people ) (update: it's Songbird/Guitarhero) 10/10

I like how we dont even got a proper comfirmation of Micheal design/personality yet the ship is here already ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( im using the Nakariiale's design as a base here love their design)

Hit me with that rebound love x "u look like my ex so im using u as a replacement but ill fall for the real u eventually" x co-workers in heaven. I'm thinking smth along the line of "after Lucifer fucked off with Lilith, Micheal became Adam guardian angel n they just hang out" ya feel me here? (✿◕‿◕✿)

Shout out to Bloog_b for dragging me into this ship:DDD also im on the Adam x the archangels ship as a "gotcha" to Lucifer of sort. Like bitch u stole my wives imma steal your brotherS

Look it's Adamsapple endgame but trust me u will be feed well on this ( u know how good u gotta be for people to ditch the main ship?)

I'm giving yall 4 fics here cause i can only found 4 rn(._. )

this one is uhh non-con so beware

Micheal is indeed Adam guardian angel in this one:D

Adam x Eve (Flowertunes) 8/10

I dont care what yall said they love each other throughout Eden n Earth , might have a falling out in heaven but that doesnt change the fact that they were once IN LOVE. Honestly why cant we just have a couple that have the same bright-eyed innocence like one another.I refuse to believe Eve like willingly cheat on Adam with malicious intent n all, simply she was indeed ''tricked'' or just not fully understand the sistuation, n Adam love her way too much to think that she would do that to him like Lilith. Hell the dude was heartbroken after L left , starting the abandonment issues, so he would have cling to Eve, doing everything so that he aint alone again, even if that mean leaving Eden

Honestly it pisses me off that the Adam/Eve tag on ao3 most of the time is just 1 dialouge between them back when Eve bit the apple n thats it no elaboration on the couple whatsoever >:(((

Lots of switcharoos

sinner eve woooo

look its hard trynna find a fic focusing on them ok?

Adam x St. Peter (Guitargreeter (bet ya didnt see that coming:))) 7/10

Base on this fanfic alone Joe my dude u r on the path of becoming THE Adam crack-ship writer n i am here for this:)))) just so u wait this dude gonna whip out a AdamxNifty , AdamxHusk fic later on ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

From within the fic itself the ship its 2 bros in love with homophobia standing in the way >:( also when did we have a name?!?!?!?

I just like Adam x anyone in heaven alright:D like bro famous n he got that ancient rizz, u telling mr he cant bag a hottie or 2-100+ hmm?

Adam x Alastor (Angelicradio) 8/10

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ABOUT THEM THAT I SHIP I JUST DO φ(゜▽゜*)♪ i blame YOU honestly rn this ship is either Adam found Al after the fight n they make a deal or they're in heaven n they chillin this ship is confusing:D

They're angels on heaven

Adam gone back into eden n do shit differently

This is both Adam/Eve n Adam/Alastor kinda

Adam x Alastor x Lucifer (Angelicradioapple/ Charlie's dads (only me call them that lol)) 9/10

''Hey Charlie u know how u r sad that your mother left? Wellllllll i got you 2 new dads suprise:DDDD''

Look 3 miserable men who hate each other + hell's greatest dad + my love for Dadam = Messy ass old men yaoi :DDDD n it work perfectly with Alastor Asexuality too!!! Like Adam n Lucifer could fuck each other brains out before Al joining in for the cuddles lol

Chaos ensue

Not exactly a love triangle but a love corner but hey we barely got food here :D

I cant believe how hot this shit is lol

Adam x Eve x Lilith x Lucifer (Eden poly/ applecore?) 8/10

They could have been all married to each other(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ But as much as i go "OooOooo Poly yay'' i just cant vibe with EvexLucifer, like the cheating vibes is wayyyyyyyyy too much i just cant man . I mean with the interpetation that Lucifer came to Eden to hang out with the humans they all know eachother, they're a throuple yes but BUT when Eve came into the picture it was only with Adam n him only so the other 2 is ehhhh. Im fine with EvexLilith cause im seeing it happening later, not hidden from Adam while LuciferxEve got that deception going on .So uhhh in this ship they're more like bestie than lovers to me¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also AdamxLilith is an underrated pairing like everytime i saw this applecore thing going on these 2 r at most tolerate each other like cmonnnnn we already twist this to hell n back, why cant we make it so their arguement was a petty non-malicious one n they still cares for each other hmm???

They're one happy family

IDK what to tell u bittersweet reunion n loving family is the only typa fic u get with this ship

Not that im complaining i need this wholesomeness

Adam x Mammon (Adammon/Madam/Greedyguitar/ 1st chirstmas.... hasnt had an offical name yet) 10/10

They r litteraly same person different font idk what to tell u. More insults thrown around than Guitarspear but they're pretty similar. Adam is just " sinners suck ass but this dude is the worst in the best way". Also they're both big bois (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ , they love towering over others

I'm sorry but there r barely BARELY

any fics of them :(

The art side is more plentiful tho :D

Adam x Angel Dust (Holydust/guitardust) 5/10

THEY ARE BESTIES YOUR HONOUR n that the exact reason why i cant see them be together as a couple 100%, like the shit-talking bff vibes r wayyyy too strong XD Angel finally got someone who have the same vulgar humour as him n if Adam got married in hell Angel would 100% be his best bitch of honour (≧∀≦)ゞq(≧▽≦q)

They're best friends who have casual no-string attached sex that is ACTUALLY no-string attached:)))

I came to ship them due to those "What if they're co-workers under Val' scenarios ive been seeing on Tumblr

I got like 1 fic on ao3 i mean if u r looking for just platonic friendship between them then rest asure most Adam's redemption fics have that

I got 1 fic on tumblr

Adam x Charlie (Charadam/Guitarprincess) 5/10

U know this ship give me a pretty bad first impression since a good chunk of the fics r either heavy non-con shit or lean wayyyyy to much into the daddy kink, ya know how Charlie got suppose daddy issues n all that jazz?:))) yeah that... that

But after seeing the art side of this ship im chillin with them now, since the art r pretty wholesome, usually having them decked out in punk-rock clothings hanging out. It's a big "Fuck you" to Lucifer n i live for these mf argueing ╰(*°▽°*)╯

So uhhh stay away from the fics if ya want an actual functional couple instead of wtv messed up shit we got there:))) But here's a fic anyway, the only one where it feel bearable n actual trynna go into said messed up relationship i already warn you

We got cracks like Guitarmaid (AdamxNifty), Valadam (AdamxVal) which i dont have enough materials to decied, Classicalrock (AdamxSera) sound interesting but also havent found anything , Guitarhalo (AdamxEmily) is an unexpected find, find i deem them to be more familial than romantic so we'll see if there's a fic good enough to convince me

Edit:i forgot to add Blitzo like Mammon already there why did i forgot

Adam x Blitzo (i dont think anyone even ship this but me:)) 7/10

I cant find a single fic where they has anything more than a 1 nightstand n 1 interaction where they hit it off , i live off imagination alone (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) but like fr fr they would match so well, like their bloodlust n general jerkiness would make them the 3rd asshole x asshole ship on this list :DDDD

Tho as much as i wanna see them go further i feel like an on-n-off relationship/friends with benefits fit em more ya know ( *^-^)ρ(*╯^╰) If ya have any fic but the 2 here that have them interact lemme know cause a bitch need food :)

This is a lot of tag(._. )

[bruhhxiao]

Like when we were younger

(sfw/nsfw)

paring Anubis x step-sister!reader

! warnings: paring sister reader x brother Anubis=incest (they are related by Osiris), depression, violence(?), (Y/N used) !

requested by @gongyunlian

“Try to convince him Y/N, please…”

“uncle Seth it’s not like I enjoy this situation, my brother looks like another person” You told him walking in circle as he sat on his throne.

“Osiris changed him! My only son…” you patted Seth shoulder.

“Hours… Hours says it’s better this way..” You whispered

“He’s wrong! And you know Y/N!”

After you left Seth you went to visit your mother Isis, she fall in a deep state of sleep since your father Osiris was killed by Seth. She loved your father and she raised Anubis like her biological son, like Hours and became gods. Osiris betrayed her after all the love she gave and showed to him… she forgive him after she knew about Anubis real father.

“I promise mother, I will try to take him back.” You caressed her right cheek.

A few days later you went to Anubis temple, it was a chilly night and it was quieter than usual.

“Anubis can I have a word with you?” You knelt in front of his statue, but this time he didn’t show up like he used to. You were the most close compared to Hours. You were siblings and we never been against each other. You were one thing.

“Please I have something to tell you..” You last said before leaving the temple walking bare foot on the cold sand of the desert.

“Can you please stop following me and talk normally?” You said looking at your shadow watching Anubis coming out of it. He just stood in front of you silent.

“Look at yourself. You never talk, you always hide your face under this mask even when we are alone… where did my brother go?” You tried to reach his mask to take it off but he snapped your hand leaving you speechless.

“Your father is worried! Hours knows something i don’t. Tell me Anubis, tell me please…”

“Seth is no longer my father I don’t need to go see him” he disappeared dissolving into the darkness of his shadow.

You were bathing playing with the blue lotus that you brought with you into the bath. You were a god, the god of protection, anxiety, perfection and purity. The blue lotus was your symbol, your blessing. You probably inherited this specialty from your father and you remembered how you and Anubis played with this flower when you were younger and far from the responsibility of your journey.

“Why are you so stubborn..”

“He is keeping you safe…” You look on the side you stop Hours sitting on the balcony of the chamber looking at the red sky.

“From what Hours? He is hurting himself standing by the one who made him like that”

“You don’t get it! He wants to see Seth suffer! Watching his most important ones standing by his side!” Hours shouted flying away leaving you even more confused, how could Osiris hurt his own son to take revenge over Seth.

“You said you wouldn’t never leave me..” You said thinking about the promise you and Anubis made when you were young.

You went to his temple again sitting in front of his well sculpted stone that was made for prayers towards the god. You left a gift like human do, you left a blue lotus.

When you went back to your mother you saw Anubis talking to her leaving a blue lotus. As he was about to disappear you dashed to him grabbing his mask revealing his long curly black hair, his shocked expression made you ran through the hallway leaving the servants confused. He chased you by the shadows trying to get his mask back.

“Now you know how I felt when I was younger!” That’s right he used to tease you taking away your toys or food and made you ran for minutes until you ended up crying but that was actually an excuse to be close to you, to cuddle you, to protect you.

“Y/N…” He groaned stepping close.

You took off your mask showing your features that Anubis couldn’t see after he became a god. He grew up so you did but he didn’t expect to find you as beautiful as the first time he saw you but there was something that he never felt when he was younger. You wore his mask was jumping around your chamber trying to escape.

“I look good right? You can take mine if you wan-“ He grabbed you by the gold necklace and he pinned you to the wall.

He took the mask and he threw it on the floor, you were surprised by his actions but he didn’t give you time to realized what had happen that he grabbed your cheek pulling you against his lips. The kiss wasn’t aggressive but you could feel the desire. He picked you up caressing your hips to your breast. He snapped back making you land on your feet leaving you breathless.

He grabbed his mask walking out of the chamber. He was speechless, he was angry and guilty at same time… he hated himself for this.

“what about Isis? Please help her Anubis!” You shouted as he disappeared in the shadows.

You were walking in the dark desert a hand grabbed your ankle from the could orange sand. Anubis hand.

“Your mother.” He says as a tear falls down on your cheek

“she woke up.” He continued as his hand melted in shadows and sand.

When you arrive Isis was sitting on the edge of her bed next to her was Nephtys consoling her.

“Mother!” You shouted running towards her but your aunt Nephtys stopped you.

“Y/N! Have you seen Anubis?” She asked a bit worried looking first Isis and then back to you. You nodded.

Your back laid against the cold wall near the balcony, head lost in thoughts until a cold hand holds your shoulder.

silent as always.

“What is wrong with you!” You say angrily without even turning to see who he was. You knew, you could tell by his touch. You stood up taking off your mask grabbing his black tie pulling him near you.

”What happened to you…” You started again until he snapped his black soft curls hiding his expression, teeth biting into his lips almost about to bleed.

“Anubis..” You called softly grabbing his cheek making him look at you as you freed his eyes from the hair.

As you leaned closer caressing his cheek trying to read into his eyes he liked his lips.

“He’s gonna hurt you…” he finally spoke leaning closer to your face.

“I don’t want him to hurt you.” He continued.

He leaned close, lips crushing into yours with his hand behind your neck. As you kissed him back he pushed off. He grabbed your hips picking you up.

“I won’t let him…”

He says as he reveals your breast massaging it as he kisses your neck. He brings you to the bed laying on top kissing every inch of your body.

“you’re so soft”

He said dry as he kissed you to your lips to your hips. He takes your bottom off making you jolt by his sudden action. You covered your body calling his name for once making him snap from his fantasy…

He doesn’t say anything he kisses you cuddles you going from your neck to your hips. He kisses your intimacy softly and slowly as brings a finger inside by surprise.

He added another finger thrusting slowly but steadily while his lips leave kisses on your tummy.

He pulls the fingers out and flip you with your belly against the mattress. His chest pressed against your back as he goes inside making you arch your back.

“I can’t hold it anymore” He says while your fists clenched on the linen sheets.

He waits a few seconds before he starts moving holding your belly with his hand while you cry out the pain that becomes pleasure in no time. Anubi is gently but gives you every inch of him as he kisses your back to your neck kissing it, sucking it, biting it. He slipped out making you turn and face him.

“my baby…” you mumbled you use to tease him every time back in the past, tease his protective side as the older brother.

He grabbed your hand and he kissing it before leaning down kissing your lips while caressing you cheek.

He hugs you tightly as he goes back in with his face pressed in your neck leaving marks and wet kisses trying to hide his moans. You arch your back as you’re getting closer and he thrusts deep. He bumps his nose into yours as the thrusts became slower but stronger taking away your breath. He holds tightly as you both came together.

After a few second he leans down and kisses your lips and then laying on top of you resting his head on your chest as you stroke his curly hair while you looked outside at the dark blue sky.

It reminded you when you used to spend time with him in the past where he would let you cuddle him so you would stop complaining, but it was an excuse for him to be close to you and spoil him with your affection and cuteness. He knew that in the future you would cuddle him with stronger feelings.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Henlooo guys this is such an unlucky day! First I want to apologize to @gongyunlian for taking months to upland their request but I had some family issues. And I finished the story this morning but I was such in a hurry that most of the finale got deleted so I had to rewrite it, so apologize if it’s boring or doesn’t make sense at all. Small reminder, English isn’t my first language so ignore the grammar mistakes if there are any. LOVE YA<3 and feel free to ask something request are open!

[thesupreme316]

hiiiiii I hope you have a amazing day,

I was wondering how the Aew boys react if someone try to use you against them like during the matches with them or in backstage with them busy with a other match ( like the attacker interrupt the match to show you being attacked) , I hope this makes sense 😭

i gotchuuuuu sweetheartttt

AEW Stars React To: You Being Attacked by Their Opponents

Pairings: Kenny Omega X Reader, Ricky Starks X Reader, Hook X Reader, Darius Martin X Reader, Nick Wayne X Reader, Daniel Garcia X Reader, Eddie Kingston X Reader

Word Count: 1.2K

Supreme Speaks: Thanks to anon for this request (YALL KEEP EM COMING), this was really fun and a little bit different than how I typically post these. please know that you are loved and appreciated

Warnings: ANGST and fluff but ANGST, GIFS are NOT mine, not proofread

Taglist: @hooks-martin @hookerforhook @wwenhlimagines @eddie-kingstons-wifey @triscillal @cassie0sstuff @sheinthatfandom

**Every person has their own backstory (in a wrestling world where I am a fantastic booker/producer) and the person who attacked them are in ()**

Eddie Kingston (BCC)

This happened during Eddie’s match against Christian Cage

Eddie didn’t want you out there in fear that Christian might rizz you up (or even Luchasurus no judgment)

So as he’s about to finish the match; the titantron shows up with you on the floor as Wheeler Yuta and Claudio tower over you

Eddie goes berserk; he no longer cares about the match; fuck the match

He leaves the match to rush to your aid with a kendo stick; whacking and cursing anyone who dares get in the way

He gets to you and hits Claudio and Wheeler as they run away; he holds you with so much care and curses himself out too

“Fuck Claudio and his Yorkie bitch! Fuck, I should have kept an eye on you doll. I’m sorry, it’s my fault”

Legit feels bad about the situation (it almost reduces him to tears) as you are put in an ambulance

Looks at Mox and says “You betta pray that she’s okay or Renee won’t be able to recognize her husband”

Darius Martin (Kingdom)

Okay hear me out; the Kingdom attacks you and then throws you on stage during Darius’ match to distract him

He looks at Action Andretti and Matt Sydal as they tell him to check on you; Darius goes with you backstage as doctors check on you

He’s silent….which is unusual and almost unsettling for you; he’s really taking everything to heart and is angrily simmering

“I’m so sorry that they dragged you into my mess, but I promise I will fix this”

He really feels remorseful about everything and certainly disappointed with himself that he allowed this to happen

Next week; he comes out with a chair and whoops ass

But I think he would go so far to the point where Andretti and Matt have to come out and say stop

He calms down and sits with you backstage for the rest of the show (he prolly will never take his eyes off you again)

Hook (Jack Perry)

Mans is fucking up everyone in sight

Bad enough that Jack took his title and refused to give him a rematch; so Hook is wrestling a jobber

As Hook has his opponent in the Redrum; Jack pops up on the screen with Anna Jay who is just choking you out (wish it was me)

Hook keeps the submission on long enough for the bell to ring before zooming backstage; just as Anna and Jack getaway

He is livid and starts throwing people left and right until he realizes that you are still on the ground

I think he feels exposed at the fact you were attacked cause he really does care about you

He helps you up and is visibly upset; vows to get revenge but then has a better idea

Two weeks later; he returns with you in tow and you two start WHOOPING THOSE TRICKS (to the point where the FTW championship is on the line in a tag team match; ex Edge and Kelly Kelly vs Dolph Ziggler and Laycool)

Nick Wayne (Swerve)

THIS SWEET BABY

He honestly doesn’t know what to think (and what he did to deserve Swerve hating him so much)

I feel like as soon as he sees your unconscious self on the screen, he would immediately dash backstage (like Eddie)

He would run up to your body “Y/N! Are you okay?” Before getting attacked by Swerve and AR Fox; who would then be run off by Best Friends

As he falls to the ground and when he wakes up, Nick would think that he’s a failure (DESPITE NOTHING IS HIS FAULT)

It would really take you constantly reassuring him that he was fine and nothing is his fault

“Yeah sure, but if I can’t protect you from attacks; then what kind of a man and wrestler am I?”

Like Darius, Nick would never allow you to leave his sight

Not until he ended this feud with Swerve

Kenny Omega (Will Ospreay)

Kenny would be that person who would just fill his mind continuously

During his match against Jon Moxley (sorry), The United Empire shows up with you about to go through a table

He turns his attention as Jon rolls him up and wins; Kenny immediately runs to the back

The Bucks attack the group and you are dropped on the floor (not through the table); you have no injuries

As he approaches backstage, mans is worried and anxiety has filled his body

Subconsciously declares war with Opsreay and will allow guilt to take over his mind

“I swear to you that Ospreay, that son of a bitch, will pay for this shit. And he will literally pay for your therapy (bitch take the free therapy plz)”

So much to the point where he’s not smiling anymore and treats every match like a deathmatch

Tbh, as long as Will shows up, Kenny will attack him without fail

Ricky Starks (CM Punk/The Factory)

OKAY LISTEN TO ME I believe that CM Punk would do some fucked up shit (as a true heel)

So during after Ricky’s match on Collision (who hasn’t seen you all night), Punk would show the footage of you being attacked by The Factory

But then he would say; “but that was earlier tonight”

And then BAM Punk attacks Ricky from behind and leaves him the ring

Ricky is upset at himself for not recognizing that you were missing all night and mad that he allowed Punk to attack him and you

Immediately checks on you and apologizes profusely

“I’m so sorry; I should have noticed, I should have made sure you were beside me-” “Ricky, you have been saying I’m sorry for the past hour” “Because I am!”

Would cut a vicious promo on Punk that embarrassed and angered him at the same time

Vows to get his revenge and starts it by attacking Punk

Daniel Garcia (Chris Jericho)

OKAY WOULD LOVE TO DO A POST ON HOW I WOULD BOOK DANNY’S EXIT FROM JAS

Danny is on the verge of leaving the JAS due to differences and Chris’ power trips, and you are his escape from it all

Chris knows this and tries to use it to his advantage; he tries to talk to you about Danny and keeping him in the JAS

To which you disagree and say it’s his decision; to which he got angry….and to which he may or may not have hit you with the baseball bat (CAUSE HE’S A JACKASS)

All of this was shown during Daniel and Sammy’s tag team match; Danny immediately jumped down from the apron (essentially leaving Sammy hanging) and ran to the back

He would be so angry that he would quit the JAS right then and there

Time skip, you were okay; when Danny told you the news, you were happy but you wouldn’t show it to him, asking him if he was sure

“Y/N, your safety, and well-being is more important to me than Jericho’s trash ass club. And it always will be.”

The following weeks are filled with confrontations until Daniel joins the BCC (who are not complete assholes in this universe)

HES FREE

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

[hard-core-super-star]

Hiya, may I request something for Kate bishop.

(Peter could be rs cousin or something.) Reader (who is spiderwoman and dating Kate), Kate and Yelena help Peter Parker (T. Holland) with the villains from the other earth's and as a result green goblin ends up killing aunt May and she seeks out revenge for may and almost kills green goblin but Yelena and kate stop her. (Oh, and Peter is the only one who is forgotten)

no such thing as good grief [K.Bishop]

pairing: kate bishop x parker!reader

summary: you always knew being a superhero came with a long list of dangers but it turns out you weren't quite ready to deal with someone else suffering for your mistakes.

warnings: major character death; heavy mentions of blood + injuries + grief; a huge serving of angst with a side of hurt/comfort, a dash of humor, and a sprinkle of plot; weird descriptions of fight scenes

wordcount: 3.2k

a/n: i probably should have rewatched no way home for this but shhh. any inconsistencies are just part of this other timeline because i said so and the MCU timeline is incredibly messy anyway. i very clearly got way too attached and wrote way too much but whoops, hope you enjoy <3 [also yes, may is R's mom in this but somewhere along the way, i resorted to just calling her 'may' instead 'mom' because I didn't want it to get too repetitive]

* * * * * * *

Nobody ever said being an Avenger was easy.

Especially now that most members are either dead, retired, off-world, or just simply unreachable. Nobody wanted to address the fact that the safety of planet Earth now rests solely in the hands of a bunch of college students and a Russian ex-assassin.

Of course, there’s still Dr. Strange and his merry band of sorcerers, including Wong, but it seems the only thing that man can successfully protect is his massive ego. It’s harsh, sure, but that doesn’t make it any less true. 

Although, maybe you’re just bitter that Stephen’s soft spot for your cousin ultimately got you tangled in a mess you had no business being in. 

A crack in the multiverse is bad enough but it being caused by one of Stephen's failed spells is even worse.

And of course, Peter's seniority when it comes to being part of a superpowered team means when he calls, you answer. There’s also the fact that he’s family and your mom would absolutely lecture you if you ignored him…again.

You really wanted to sit this one out but there was no way your girlfriend was going to let you. You tried all the tricks you knew to convince her but ultimately, her and Yelena ended up dragging you out of your apartment to help Peter fix his multiversal disaster.

“So, your plan to defeat these villains is to…not defeat them?” You question. “In what universe does that make sense?”

“Don’t be a jerk, y/n/n,” Kate mumbles.

You playfully roll your eyes at the archer’s words, biting back a comment about how rare it is to see her actually attempting to focus on forming a plan. She’s gotten a lot better at not rushing into situations but old habits die hard.

“Actually, it’s May’s plan,” Peter says. “I know it’s unconventional but I think it could work. We’re the good guys, right?”

Yelena shoots you a look but you just shrug in response. Fighting with him will only lead to more problems that you’re not sure you’re qualified to solve. Actually, none of you are qualified for any of this.

Webs, arrows, and strong punches are not going to get you out of this one.

You swallow down your hesitation and give Peter a small nod. “Right. What do you need us to do?”

Step 1, according to your annoying Spider-Cousin, is to pick up a few materials for him while he takes the misplaced villains to Happy’s condo. You don’t love the idea of being an errand girl but you already agreed to help and there’s no way Kate will let you take your words back.

Her loyalty is as admirable as it is annoying. But at least you get to spend time driving around New York with your two favorite people. And by driving you really mean sitting in the backseat with Kate while Yelena complains about how much harder it is to drive a car than a motorcycle.

Step 1 takes about an hour to complete and it’s not until you’re all heading to Happy’s place that your girlfriend decides to question you and your lack of trust in Peter’s plan.

“Since when are you so cynical?” She asks, her arm loosely wrapped around your waist.

“Me?” The question catches you off-guard and you turn your face away from the car window to look at her instead. “I'm not the one shooting arrows through people’s limbs.”

“It’s not like I’m killing people.”

“Neither am I,” you reply with a shrug. “I'm just saying to send them back to their universe.”

“So they can die,” she says, her tone making her statement sound more like a question than anything else.

“Well…yeah.”

It sounds brutal when said out loud but it’s the logical choice. Keeping them in your universe isn’t an option and there’s no telling what kind of damage Peter’s plan will have on those other timelines.

“And you don’t think that’s cruel?”

“Should I?” You look away from Kate’s eyes before you get distracted from the conversation at hand due to the puppy-dog look they’ve been carrying the past few minutes. “Yelena, you wanna help me out here?”

“You’re gonna get the heartless Russian assassin to help you prove your point?” She asks with a chuckle.

“Ex-assasin,” the blonde corrects her. “And I am not heartless. But y/n is right. What is that stupid saying? Something about a circus?”

“Not my circus, not my monkeys.”

“Exactly.”

“Okay, so if you’re so against this plan why did you agree to it?” Kate finally asks the million-dollar question.

The answer is a lot more complicated than one would think and you’re not in the mood to explain why the plan being your mom’s idea means so much to you. So, you take a page out of the archer’s book and reply with a stupid joke instead.

“You think May would have been fine with me letting Peter run around on his own?”

Yelena’s reply is just as witty as yours. “I am only here because someone has to babysit you while y/n babysits Spider-Boy.”

“You guys are jerks.” There are notes of humor in her voice that she tries to wipe away with an overdramatic pout.

You chuckle and lean in to kiss her, ignoring Yelena’s complaints about how annoyingly in love you two are.

The moment is a welcome respite from a chaotic and difficult situation.

A situation that only gets worse with every minute that goes by.

The three of you finally arrive at Happy’s condo and are led inside by your overly chipper cousin. You try to ignore the way the hairs on the back of your neck stand up at the mere sight of the supervillains scattered all around the living room.

You’re probably just being paranoid. That’s what you tell yourself until Peter lets it slip that he’s not the only person watching over the time-scattered villains.

You grab a hold of his arm and lead him away from Kate and Yelena, more for his sake than yours if you’re being honest. “What do you mean my mom is here? Why the hell would you bring her into this mess?

“I didn’t do anything!” He responds. “She wanted to help. You know how she is.”

If you had a nickel every time he used that excuse you’d be as rich as your girlfriend.

“This is different, Pete! It’s not just her bringing us snacks while we fix our web shooters, this is serious.”

“Which is exactly why she should be here. We need all the help we can get to do this. You have no problem with Kate being here, why is May different?”

It takes you a second to be able to reply, your brain not fully computing his audacity to make such a flippant comparison. “Because she’s not a superhero, you dimwit! She’s the only family I have left, I am not letting her get hurt because you convinced her to help us.”

“First of all, ouch. Second of all, relax. She can take care of herself.”

All you can really do is groan since it’s obvious no amount of arguing will get him to change his mind and help you convince May to go home. There’s also the fact that she probably wouldn’t listen to you even if you managed to get Peter on your side.

“Fine. Just tell me what to do so we can wrap up this shitshow.”

You ignore his very obvious sigh of relief and focus on lending the helping hand you promised earlier. Help that makes you ignore your growing unease and leaves you unprepared for the violent turn things take.

You’re not even sure how it happens.

One second you and Kate are arguing about how Sandman’s powers even work while Yelena and May help administer Dr. Ock’s cure and the next you’re watching Green Goblin turn the rest of the misplaced villains against all of you.

Your one and only thought is on getting your mom out of here unscathed but it quickly becomes clear you won’t be able to just swing her to safety. There’s no plan, or even time to think things through, there’s only a tense atmosphere and an inkling that things won’t go well no matter what you do.

Green Goblin’s taunts ring in your ears right as Electro blasts Dr. Ock out the window. Kate shoots you a look you can’t ignore and you hold on to the silent promise that she’ll be okay without you.

You dive out the window without a second thought, barely managing to shed your hoodie and reveal the Spider Suit hidden beneath your clothes. (Peter can keep all his fancy little upgrades, nothing beats the classic suit in your opinion)

You manage to help Dr. Ock before he slams into the ground with equal parts teamwork and a staggering amount of webs.

He assures you he’s fine once you manage to get onto a nearby roof, not so subtly doing his best to get rid of a few webs that are stuck to his clothes. You shoot him an apologetic smile before jumping off the roof and swinging back to the now blacked-out building.

You ignore the swarm of cop cars and news vans that litter the front of the building and impulsively divide to crash through a window into the lobby, figuring it’ll be faster to find May and your team this way.

You jump onto your feet after your literal crash landing only to find Kate and Peter in the middle of fighting Green Goblin. A part of you screams to run and find your mom but then Osborn kicks Kate’s bow out of her hand and your body reacts faster than your mind can even comprehend.

“Hey, asshole!” You shoot a web at his leg and yank him backward. “Get your hands off of her.”

He stumbles but doesn’t fall the way you anticipated. Instead, he turns to look at you, that chilling smirk still plastered on his face. “What is it with you Parkers and your savior complex?”

Your first instinct is to run at him but you catch the archer’s look as she runs to help a badly injured Peter. If it’s a distraction she needs, that’s exactly what you’ll provide.

“It’s part of our charming personality.”

You shrug and shoot at him again, managing to pull his focus toward the barrage of webs you send his way.

You expect to keep him occupied until Peter and Kate catch their breath but instead, May rushes out of the stairway, a bleeding Yelena trailing behind her, and she injects the so-called cure into the back of Osborn’s neck.

The cure doesn’t work. All it does is send the Green Goblin into a fit of rage.

You urge May to run in between Osborn’s taunts directed mainly at you and Peter. She doesn’t listen and you’re too distracted to notice the deadly glider that hovers just outside the window.

By the time Kate warns you it’s too late.

The blast it creates when it crashes in sends you flying onto the ground. All the air gets knocked out of your lungs from the impact but you don’t get time to lay there and recover.

You somehow manage to get back onto your feet right as Osborn sends a bomb flying your way. You just barely manage to web it and throw it to the side before it goes off, sending bits of debris raining down onto all of you.

There’s the distinct sound of Kate’s boots running toward you, Yelena’s Russian curse words, and a part of you that tells you to go check on May. There’s no chance in hell that you’re letting Green Goblin get away though so you swallow down your pain from aching joints and bleeding cuts and run after him.

You arrive outside just in time to watch him throw another bomb that you’re too slow to stop.

The explosion throws you back onto the ground and you groan as you land on a piece of glass. You’re breathless and bleeding and it’s only then that the guilt crashes into you at once.

This time, your attempt to stand is far less balanced and you stumble onto a familiar frame. “Hey, hey, easy. There’s no rush, babe.”

You happily accept Kate’s embrace, the familiarity of her comforting touch soothing some of your pain. “You okay?”

“Yeah, nothing some band-aids and a nap won’t fix.”

Hearing the usual humor in her tone brings you back to reality…which brings your mind back to your mom and the way you so recklessly rushed outside without knowing if she was injured. “How about Peter and May? They okay?”

Your girlfriend’s silence never means anything good and in this context, it makes your heart drop to your stomach in an instant. You’re about to question her again when Yelena’s voice stops you.

“We need to get out of here before the cops arrive…again.”

You push your injured body away from Kate’s, searching for the answer you don’t want to hear. “Kate…”

“I’m sorry.” She avoids your eyes as she responds. “Peter tried but it was already too late. She’s gone, y/n.”

You don’t hear anything she says after that.

It’s strange the way the world slows to a stop around you while your overwhelmed brain tries to process the Earth-shattering information. Strange how a second ago everything seemed to make sense and now you’re left gasping for breath, reaching for answers you know don’t matter.

The how, the why, the what. None of that matters. 

May is dead.

And there’s nothing you could have done to stop it despite the powers, and the gadgets, and the hours of training.

You didn’t even get to say goodbye before she-

“y/n, it’s not your fault.”

“Listen to Kate Bishop, she’s finally right for once.”

“Hey!”

Their attempt to comfort you turns into chaotic bickering but you don’t pay attention to their words. You can’t think about anything except the gaping hole in your chest that had once been full of May’s knowing looks and thoughtful words.

Kate’s right.

It’s not your fault. Or May’s. Or even Peter’s. There’s only one man to blame for this. 

And you’re sure as hell going to make him regret his choice to mess with your family.

“y/n.” Kate’s voice manages to cut through the hate-filled fog that’s starting to cover your mind. “y/n, don’t.”

You don’t listen to her words, you don’t even take in the way she so easily knows what you’re thinking, you just do what you’ve always done: keep moving.

You successfully escape your girlfriend’s embrace and start running. You’re not sure where you’re going or how you’re going to find him but the plan will come later. Right now, you just need to do something before the grief consumes you.

Kate yells after you but there’s no way she’ll be able to chase after you. Especially once you start swinging from building to building.

The hours pass by in between blurs of rain, tears, and the occasional wall you end up crashing into. Your phone blows up with missed calls and countless texts but you don’t care.

The entire world could crash and burn without you for all you care. The light within your own world has already been extinguished. 

Your search ends up leading you right to the Statue of Liberty where you’re not at all surprised to find a chaotic battle going on. Maybe you should have checked your phone to get caught up with the plan but that doesn’t matter.

What does matter is that you’ve finally found what you’ve been looking for. And your mind is dead-set on your objective.

You ignore the rest of the fights going on, including the look of pain and relief on Kate’s face once she sees you swing past her, and hone in on Peter.

You're still bleeding and there's a sharp pain in your leg you can't ignore but your injuries don't matter. All that matters is avenging May.

You land next to Peter without a word, the venom in your eyes saying more than your voice could. You're both fighting for the same thing but you have no doubt he's still pulling his punches.

Something you have no intention of doing.

“Well, well, well, look who decided to join the fun,” Green Goblin taunts. “Too tired of running after your dead parents?”

“Shut your mouth,” you reply as you step toward him. “You don't know what you're talking about.”

That only makes him laugh. “Trust me, pain makes you stronger. You'll see, all I have to do is take away your pretty little girlfriend next and you'll understand.”

There's no hesitation left in your body once you hear those words.

You lunge forward, tackling Osborn to the ground. That stupid smirk doesn't leave his face even while you rain down punches on him.

“Come on! Is that all you can do? What's the point of two Spider-Idiots if one is too weak to fight?”

You know he's only taunting you. Trying to push your buttons and get you to break. Too bad that's exactly what you want to do.

Every time he pushes you back, you kick him back twice as hard. You stumble and get punched in the face enough times to make your ears ring but you don't dare stop.

You don't even think.

You just punch and punch and punch until Osborn’s on the ground, his witty mouth finally silent.

Seeing him like this only serves to remind you of what you've lost, of the pain that's taken hold of your every thought and move. You lift your hand to shoot a web at his forgotten glider when a voice stops you dead in your tracks.

“y/n?”

The mere sound of your name coming out of Kate’s mouth in that desperate tone is enough to make your breath catch in your throat. You already know what she's going to say so you speak up first. “I have to.”

“No, you don't. You've done enough, okay? You can walk away.”

You look down at your hands, at the bloody mess you've left behind, and the tears start falling before you can stop them.

The hand that pulls you up doesn't belong to the archer but it's full of an understanding only Yelena could be capable of. “Go on, Spider-Boy and I got this.”

You nod, too numb and overwhelmed to fully accept the weight of what you've done. Of what you almost did.

“Kate?” You call out as you finally turn around to face her.

“I’m right here.” She greets you with the same soft look and warm smile you fell in love with, nothing but compassion in her gaze.

You all but collapse into her waiting arms, your shoulders slumped as you finally give in to the all-consuming grief that lingers in every breath you take.

The sounds of the chaos around you fades into nothingness.

All you can hear is Kate's soft reassurances and the steady beat of her heart. You don't need anything else than that right now. Despite how strong the urge for revenge had been.

You just need your girlfriend…and a long nap.

Peter watches the scene with a small, albeit sad, smile on his face. There's a weight on his chest that even fixing his mistakes won't take away.

But at least he knows you won't be alone. The spell will make you and everyone else he loves forget about him but at least you'll still have Kate.

It'll be hard but he has no doubt you'll be able to rebuild and find the light inside of yourself that May always believed was there. Flickering underneath all the pain of your past.

Now you and Kate can shine together.

Without him and the chaos he unnecessarily brought into your life.

[corneliushickey]

#furiosa: a mad max saga #furiosa spoilers

ok i've spoken to a few friends about this but i wanna put my thoughts together more coherently in a single posté, so: furiosa (2024) removes any significance in furiosa's story arc in fury road (2015) by removing her complicity + culpability

in fury road, furiosa (like nux!!!) is a cog in the immortan's war machine. he calls her out by name to the crowd at the citadel. she drives the war rig, a machine so totally her own and so much a part of her that it bears her mark on the driver's side door. she enjoys a place of relative privilege and safety as an imperator, a position in which she carries out the immortan's orders and advances his cause of domination over the wasteland.

yes, she was taken from the green place as a child, separated from the vuvalini through no fault of her own. yes she was doing what she had to do to survive. but she was still culpable. her survival was still built on a pile of corpses. her survival was instrumental in the subjugation + opression of the citadel's citizens.

AND!! CRUCIALLY!!! rescuing the wives from the vault was not her idea!! it was angharad who rallied the wives together with miss giddy and begged for furiosa's help in escaping. she agreed to try the desperate mad dash for her lost homeland because angharad, dag, cheedo, toast, and capable recruited her for the job. before that, she had given up on returning home. she had lost herself in service of the war machine. this is why it also makes sense that capable would reach out to nux with sympathy and compassion, because she's already seen one war boy find redemption and rally for their cause, why not another?

that is why when furiosa learns that the lost promised land of her childhood is gone, it is meaningful that she, the wives, nux, and the remaining vuvalini can turn around and choose to change the citadel instead. because she goes from being a part of the war machine, to running from it and taking five of its victims with her, to turning around to dismantle it.

but in furiosa (2024), furiosa is kidnapped as a child and handed to one mad warlord who murders her mother, then handed to a second mad warlord who means to keep her locked in a vault until she is of a more appropriate age for him to rape. then she understandably makes a daring escape (for which she faces. zero narrative consequences. but whatever that's another post) and sort of hides out as a scrawny silent blackthumb until praetorian jack takes her under his wing and gives her the tools she needs to escape (tools she... would have already learned from the vuvalini and dementus and her life as a blackthumb but, again, whatever, that's another post)

throughout all this furiosa's only motivation is self preservation. she is a child trying to survive kidnapping after kidnapping, seeking revenge against the men who are doing this to her, and then once she proves to dementus that she is nothing like him she just sort of hangs out for a few years until she takes the impetus to bring the wives a peach as evidence of a possible return to paradise. and then she saves them.

but the whole point of fury road was that... the wives saved her. through them furiosa came back to herself. came back to her vuvalini values. came to find values of her own. decided to take a stand against the human suffering she had spent so long enabling. got the chance to build anew.

furiosa is not the protagonist of fury road if she is a blameless victim on an equal footing with the sex slaves she's rescuing. if she were totally uninvolved in the citadel, eeking out an existence as best she could until she had the opportunity to save five fellow innocents..... she would be max rockatansky. uninvolved but committed to helping those he meets in desperate need.

her story is more complex than that. it carries more weight. and unfortunately furiosa (2024) takes that away.

[luunaz]

Could you make a part 3 to When You Come Back about Peter’s and the others reaction about what happened to the reader. And maybe showing how Peter heart breaks. Only if you want to of course.

Thank you for your request! I hope you like it.

[When you come back, part 3] Peter Pevensie

pairing: Peter Pevensie x reader

type: angst 🍂

warning: the death of the main character

part 1, part 2 and Masterlist

Peter didn't understand what Caspian had just told him. Or he didn't want to understand. He walked over to the cold stone wall where the Narnians had depicted the image of a warrior. A woman stood surrounded by soldiers and held a sword over her head. Peter ran his fingers over the rough wall and wiped away a layer of dust, allowing the colors to shine brighter.

— The tutor told me that she became queen after you left Narnia. Her reign was short-lived. When the Telmarines declared war, Queen Y/N tried to negotiate with them, as she understood that Narnia would not be able to win. But she didn't succeed, — Caspian's voice grew quieter with each sentence. He looked from Peter to the rest of the Pevensies, — this image illustrates how she, with a small detachment, detained the Telmarines while the Narnians were fleeing into the woods.

— Unfortunately, no one returned from Cair Paravel that day, — Trufflehunter said.

There were tears in Lucy's eyes. She clung to Susan for support. The elder sister felt despair. It was so hard for Susan to realize that her friend was gone. Just a year ago, they were choosing a dress for a wedding, planning for the future, and now… Edmund looked at Peter. He looked calm enough. Not a single emotion showed on his face. Ed thought at first that maybe Peter hadn't heard, but no, Peter had heard everything. His heart just collapsed in one moment. This can't be true! Despite all the pain that swept over the king, he did not give himself the opportunity to show weakness.

— And where was she buried? — Peter's voice sounded very rough and cold.

— As far as I've heard, the Narnians have never been able to find her body, — Trufflehunter said, — but we remember her during the full moon of the second summer month.

When evening came, Peter went out into the fresh air. The sun had almost set below the horizon and the forest was plunged into darkness. It was very quiet. Peter sat down on a rock that stood nearby. When he returned to Narnia, all he thought about was meeting you again, seeing your smile and feeling the warmth of your embrace. He hoped that you would be alive, that you would find a way to be with him again. It seemed that his hopes were dashed at the moment when Trufflehunter said that you had not returned. Annoyance, anger, and despair filled Peter's heart. He must take revenge on the Telmarines for what they did to the Narnians and to you.

The King took a small ring from his breast pocket. It was quite simple: gold, with a small green gemstone. This is the ring he wanted to give you after the wedding. He imagined how charming it would look on your finger. All this time, while he was in England, Peter kept him, in memory of you, so as not to forget his promise to be there and protect. He was hoping to come back, give it to you and make you his queen. He was only afraid that you wouldn't accept him at the age he is now. As it turned out, this was the least of the problems.

Even though everyone kept telling him that you were gone, Peter couldn't help but believe that he would see you. He just didn't want to believe that you would disappear from his life so easily. If he needs to fight thousands of Miraz’s soldiers, he is ready to do it. He is ready to challenge all the villains of Narnia, just to see your eyes again. Now this ring was the only reminder of you. It would have been easier to throw him out, to leave these feelings behind, but he couldn't and didn't want to. If he has to live his whole life in pain, then he will be glad, because this pain is the only thing that connects you and him. He was High King of Narnia, Emperor of the Lone Islands, Lord of Cair Paravel, Knight of the Most Noble Order of the Lion, but he never had the strength to come to terms with the circumstances.

Peter looked up at the night sky, which was already strewn with stars. Tears rolled down from his eyes. If only he could have come back earlier…

[fascinatedscrawls]

A Nice Day

"I don't know about this, Tucker. I just feel so," swiping another hand through the waist high water, Danny wrinkles his nose and fumbles for the right word. Not slow like when he can't keep up with Dash (ha, accidental pun!) at PE, but more, "Sluggish."

"Dude, it's just water." His friend points out unnecessarily before splashing a bit at Danny just to see him sputter. "How is this any worse than when you fly around in the Zone? Don't you, like, swim around in ecto?"

"No," well, actually, "kind of, but not really. It's more like flying - I will it to happen and the ecto responds."

Halfway through another splash, Tucker pauses. "Wait, if that's how you fly then how do you do it without ecto everywhere?"

Not waiting for him to recover, Danny retaliates by swiping an arm through the water. It feels even heavier at this speed, but it sends a respectable wave at Tucker who sputters.

"He uses his ecto, duh," Sam answers from under her dark umbrella a safe distance from the pool. Her boots are missing, but she looks even paler than usual as her dark clothes clash with the bright summer day. Pulling down her sunglasses she grins at them before asking, "how does it feel flying around in all that ghost blood while in the Zone?"

Tucker makes a grossed out face, but that thought occurred to Danny ages ago so his mind immediately applies that logic forward instead.

"I wonder if swimming in actual blood would be easier?"

"Come on, man," Tucker complains, "I'm trying to have a nice day!"

Conversely, Sam perks up. "Well, considering we're mostly water, I'd guess pretty similar to the pool, right?"

"Probably a little more like a salt water pool," Jazz chimes in from where she's sunbathing, an activity Danny's convinced she's doing wrong considering how much sunscreen she put on. "That wouldn't help Danny's 'sluggish' issue as I believe that's denser."

"Ugh, no thanks. I'll take normal pool water over that."

"Why not go intangible then?" Tucker asks, exasperated.

Well, it's worth a shot. A moment later and the pool water goes rushing into where Danny's standing. Swiping a hand through the water, he frowns as it meets no resistance.

"This is somehow worse," he complains, then gives Tucker a flat look when he tries to splash him again. He gets an annoyed look in return when the water goes right through him.

"Yeah, how am I supposed to win the splash fight like this?"

"You weren't going to win anyway," Danny refutes before abruptly turning tangible. All the water that rushed in immediately displaces itself and Danny uses Tucker's flinch to press his advantage, ignoring how Jazz and Sam complain from the poolside as they both get some splash damage.

"Oh, yeah?" Tucker finally manages, spitting out a bit of water before grinning back at him in a way that has Danny wondering what the trick is. "Well, at least I won't be the loser!"

Danny doesn't understand how that's possible before two more fighters enter the pool looking for revenge. He yelps, but can't quite go intangible fast enough to dodge all the water coming his way.

When he resurfaces it's to laughter and more blessedly cool water on this hot summer day.

He might lose, but Danny thinks it's still one of the nicest days in a while.

—��———————

Thanks again for voting on the prompt! This one may be a little long, but I typed it on mobile and Tumblr won't let me check the word count lol

I'll be putting the next poll up shortly if you'd like to help me pick my next prompt!

[quietlyimplode]

here again now

Warnings: violence/aftermath of torture/car accident

Word Count: 3.6k (gif not mine)

Summary: Natasha is captured, tortured and left with insomnia. (Part 1/4)

A/N: This fic was prompted by a smaller snippet that spanned into this one - through discussion with @broken—bow and support it eventuated into this mammoth fic. Without her, this would not be here. Heed warnings. There are likely others that I have not popped in. Dead dove and all that.

(pls note that the fic starts below and finishes on ao3 - i know how annoying it is to start on one platform only to have it finish on another)

1/

Revenge was the only thing keeping her alive.

Her love.

The man that had saved her, was dead.

And she knew exactly who’s fault it was.

Months in the making, dreaming and thinking of ways to dismantle the person who had taken him from her, she now had the means in which to do it.

The plan, the hatred and funding; all together meant one thing.

It was time.

Training under MI6 had made her brutally efficient, and she considers, efficiently brutal.

Her government under the sector seven project demanded several things, but the number one was information extraction. She knew more ways to get the information she wanted than she knew languages.

Which, she considered, was a lot.

With a steely look of determination, she drives.

.

Clint laughs.

“You know that’s not what I meant!”

Natasha takes the lollipop out of her mouth with a pop and grins, rolling her head over to him.

“I’m just saying that if you lose, you gotta pay,” she replies.

She leans further into the chair and puts her feet up, one leg up where the airbag sits and the other underneath her.

Clint stops at the red light and looks over to her and frowns.

“Feet off,” he growls low, “you’re going to get mud on the dash.”

Begrudgingly, she does, instead tucking her knees to her chest on the seat, curled in a ball.

“How is that even comfortable?”

Natasha pulls out her phone and changes the music.

“Blink182?”

Nodding enthusiastically, Clint drums his fingers on the steering wheel as he turns the corner and accelerates slightly. The streetlights cast a glow that stripes the road as they fly past.

The roads are unusually clear for a Thursday night, and he takes full advantage of the fact.

The traffic light ahead turns yellow and he considers going through it.

His speed is such that he could go through without a worry but he always considers drunk drivers or those that may not make the same conscious decisions and pulls to a stop.

They’re stopped for less than ten seconds before he sees the large four wheeled drive approach.

Clint reaches across for Natasha.

It barrels into them.

Within seconds, the car crumples and rolls.

The sound of metal on metal and the crunch of the car is loud in the dead of the night. The screech of the car sliding on it’s roof would make anyone cringe but to the inhabitants of the car in the midst of the accident; it doesn’t even register.

.

Continued

[imtrashraccoon]

Just a thought but imagining Nightmare in a fairy tale where he would be the prince is so funny because he's an evil and grumpy guy and would be the second villan or something

on that note. Rapunzel Au.

I'm reminded of the fairy tale about the swan princes who's sister had to make them coats so they could turn back into humans again. I'm otherwise not super familiar with fairy tales lol.

This is funny to picture!

Mkay. cracks fingers

Here is a quick spitball for a Rapunzel AU.

The queen is about to give birth to the Royal family's first child, however she falls ill and like in the original fairy tale, someone steals the witch's flower. Although this time, it's not a flower but a magic apple. The apple cures the queen's illness and she gives birth.

The witch is angry that her source of eternal youth was stolen and she decides to steal the Royal family's new child out of revenge. Only there's two children instead of one. The witch steals them away for nefarious witchy purposes but is nearly caught and so only manages to escape with one - Dream.

Nightmare is injured in the commotion, possibly being dropped by accident, but is ultimately rescued and survives his injuries. The kingdom mourns the loss of one of their young princes but life goes on.

Dream is a happy child and grows up in a secluded tower, far away from the kingdom in a forest. He's kept from the world outside by his supposedly loving mother, the witch. Maybe he makes a few odd friends like Ink or other wanderers but he never gets to see them or actually leave the tower.

Meanwhile, Nightmare also grew up and took the throne after his mother died; maybe there was an attempted coup or something. He was cold and often cruel to those who'd supposedly wronged him, earning himself quite the fearsome reputation. The problem is, his injury left him disfigured and he often struggles to function at the same level as those around him. He's also incredibly lonely but has no one willing to be friends with him. Maybe he creates an inner circle of men he tasks with doing the dirty work.

MC is a dashing rogue that has earned a rather high bounty. They stumble upon the tower one day while on the run after a job (possibly from the Royal Guard) and meet Dream. After some humourous shenanigans, they agree to take him to go see the outside world since he's been wanting to leave for a while. Maybe Ink tags along for fun and they meet some other interesting characters, like Blue who's an aspiring guard.

They travel around and see the sights of the kingdom. Their presence doesn't escape Nightmare's eye and he sends some of his men after them. (Cue Horror, Killer, and Dust.) Dream and MC don't know why Nightmare is after them but they really don't want to be caught. So an epic fight scene ensues!

Eventually, there is a confrontation with Nightmare and Dream actually recognizes him but doesn't know why. Nightmare doesn't either and hesitates to attack them. MC decides to be a hero and creates a distraction so that Dream can escape.

Dream finds himself in the forest again which is where the witch finds him and acts overjoyed to see him alive and well. The witch entreats him to return to the tower where it's safe and he does, for a time. During his time in the kingdom, he heard the tale of the lost prince and eventually he realizes that he's that prince. His "mother" only wants him for his healing powers and so he confronts her but it doesn't go well.

Meanwhile, Nightmare can't stop thinking about how familiar that golden skeleton felt and so he questions a captured MC. At first, they don't want to tell him anything but when they make the connection that Dream must be the lost prince, they agree to work together to find him.

MC is released and they make their way back to the tower, although the guards are slower to follow. They find Dream has been tied up and go to free him, only to be attacked by the witch. Nightmare arrives just in time and turns the tide of the fight. He can't kill the witch on his own, despite how powerful his magic is, and it takes the combined efforts of everyone to finally slay her.

With the witch dead, Dream returns to the kingdom with his brother and they work together to rule fairly. Although, Dream has a habit of sneaking out to go see his friends, which irritates Nightmare to no end, until he is eventually persuaded to by his men to join in as well of course!

[cosmicjoke]

Ugh, I was looking back through the visual novel for "No Regrets", and I was laughing, because people always talk about how bad Erwin's characterization was in the OVA, but it's nothing compared to how bad Levi's characterization is in the visual novel. It frustrates me especially because I often see people, mostly, it seems, Erwin stans, or eruri shippers, citing the visual novel as some sort of "evidence" of Erwin's influence on Levi, wanting to credit Erwin with Levi becoming a "better person" or with "creating Levi". They'll complain all day about how bad Erwin's characterization was in the OVA, but they won't say squat about Levi's characterization in the visual novel, and will instead use it to push their agenda of making Erwin seem superior to him, or more significant to Levi's development than he actually was.

This never gets talked about, but it's pretty clear that significant changes were made, both to the manga and the OVA adaptations, to fix Levi's characterization, because it's pure trash in the visual novel and they knew it. It makes Levi seem completely self-centered, to the point of not caring at all about what happens to Furlan or Isabel in his pursuit of his revenge on Erwin, which completely goes against everything we know about Levi. And no, this isn't down to Levi "growing" as a character or changing for the better later on. It's just bad characterization, which, again, is why they made so many fundamental and significant changes in the manga and OVA. They knew it was bad. They knew it completely mischaracterized Levi's core personality and traits.

A good example of how they fixed that characterization in the manga, especially, is that in the visual novel, when making his choice to go after Erwin, Levi completely dismisses Furlan's protests, snidely telling him and Isabel that if they stay together they can "at least handle one titan", and harshly tells him that he's the one who gets to decide, before dashing off without another word. He shows no concern for Furlan or Isabel's safety, no concern for the squads safety, no consideration for the reason they'd come to the surface in the first place, which was to give Furlan and Isabel a better life and actual opportunities to achieve more than just simple survival. It's so out of character, it's actually absurd. But in the manga, we see Levi's deep, internal struggle over his decision. It isn't a willful or irrational choice he makes. It isn't thoughtless. He cycles through all the various factors involved. He remembers Furlan's dream of coming above. He remembers Isabel's words from the night before, about how she understands why the Scouts do what they do, expressing a wish to find some similar purpose, he expresses his own concern for, not just Furlan's and Isabel's safety, but also Flagon's and the rest of their squad, ultimately concluding that if they all stay together, they'll be safer that way. He makes the decision to go after Erwin alone, and doesn't demand Furlan listen to him because "I'm the one who gets to decide", but asks Furlan to trust him, the way Furlan asked Levi to trust him and Isabel before. It isn't a power trip, or a revenge fueled blindness, or even pride that drives Levi to go after Erwin by himself, here, it's a desire to help Furlan and Isabel fulfill their own dreams, to give them that opportunity by taking the burden of getting the papers from Erwin himself, only implicating himself should he be caught. It's his desire for them to be safe, and for their squad to be safe. And yes, Levi felt a real hatred toward Erwin at that point, and felt a desire to kill him, but it wasn't that desire alone that drove him to make the choice he did. The visual novel frames it like it was though, and I absolutely despise it for that reason, and think it should be completely dismissed as a result. It's just one of the most glaring examples in it of Levi's character being completely butchered, but there's many instances throughout, which I talk more at length about in my analysis of "No Regrets".

But, again, Levi's characterization in it doesn't line up in any way, shape or form with what we actually know about Levi's character from the main, canon story itself. That's why I also feel like Isayama probably gave some input in the creation of the manga/OVA, because Levi's characterization is radically different in both, and much closer to who he is in the main manga. They made all of those changes deliberately.

Anyway, if anyone is interested in reading a more in depth analysis of all this, you can check out my thoughts here:

https://www.tumblr.com/cosmicjoke/694860600514363392/no-regrets-chapter-by-chapter-analysis?source=share

Also, here's my specific analysis of chapter 7, which goes into great detail about Levi's choice:

[ultralightpoe]

hear me out hear me out, tear you apart by she wants revenge. thinking very enemies to lovers hate fuckin kinda thing. obviously its really up to you but this song is very hot lol

Tear You Apart- Aemond Targaryen

Description: Aemond hates you and you hate him, but why did he feel so freaking good all the time

Authors Note: BUCKLE IN BITCHES! Also my requests are open for April, take a look at this post to see the request event and send some in! Happy April!

Warnings: Smut, adultery, fun fun fun

Word Count: 2924

Enjoy!

Got a big plan, this mindset maybe its right

At the right place and right time, maybe tonight

And the whisper or handshake sending a sign

Wanna make out and kiss hard, wait never mind

Alicent was punishing him. Not that she would ever admit to it, or he could ever prove, but it was just something he knew. Because there was absolutely no reason that you should be seated next to him as this gods forsaken dinner. 

Aemond had known you had entered the second his spine locked up, nervousness and anxiety racking through him as he risked a glance in your direction to see that you were already looking at him. You had walked in, a smarmy smile laced on your face, with your arm laced through your new husbands and a dazzling necklace across your neck. 

You squinted a bit at him before turning to whisper something in your husband's ear and Aemond found himself squeezing the goblet in his hand and trying his best not to sneer or rip his nephew's head off.  

You had chosen the bastard over him. How pathetic. So scared of your own emotions that you ran to the easiest target rather than facing the fucking truth. 

A smug feeling filled his chest at the thought of you moaning his name while in bed with his cowardly nephew, that feeling quickly being washed away by the sound of his mothers voice. “Lady Y/n, how radiant you look. Dare I say….glowing?”

His hand tightened across the goblet again, red blinding his sight before you answered with a small laugh. “Not yet, but not from lack of trying. I swear.”

Your voice was bragging and he tried not to laugh. As if his nephew could actually give you any form of pleasure. Not after you had Aemond.

“I do apologize for our seating arrangement, you are in between my two boys tonight for the meal.” Alicent smiles before passing you and moving to greet her old friend. You turn to Aemond and give him a polite smile before turning to Jacaerys and kissing his cheek. 

Before Aemond could remove himself from the table your husband was blocking his path, pulling out your chair for you and kissing your head, leaning down to mutter a soft “Remember the plan” before moving to his own side of the table. 

Aemond loses sight of him the second he is away from you, because he cannot seem to drag his eyes anywhere else. Gods, he hated you. Hated everything about you. From the perfect hair to the gorgeous eyes all the way to the natural way you seemed to win everyone over. Witch.

You move your head to make eye contact and the second you do his heart stops dead in his chest. It was annoying that you still had this power over him. 

“If you look any closer you might burn right through me….prince.” You smile, batting your eyelashes the way you always knew riled him up. It was like you enjoyed pissing him off. 

“Good. Last I checked we were supposed to burn the witches.” He replies, trying to keep a nonchalant attitude. He knew the second the smile laced your features that he was correct, you really did enjoy pissing him off. 

“Well since I am a witch I feel quite free to lie. By the way, your eye patch looks dashing tonight. Really brings out the purple of your eye.”

“Fuck you.”

“Maybe if you play nice with your nephews I’ll take pity on you.” 

He was so close to responding before everyone else took their seats and he was left in silence while you turned your attention to the king. Only you weren’t actually paying attention. 

You played it normal, and Aemond nearly jumped out of his skin when your hand met his under the table, a soft touch from your pinky onto his. 

He tears his hand away, turning to glare at you before you roll your own and lean back, a heat traveling across his skin when you wink. 

You were mocking him. He knew it. 

“Aemond, is it true that you and Lady Y/n grew up together?” Lord Stark asks, forcing Aemond to drag his eyes away from you. 

“Indeed. We had studies together.” You answer for him, smiling lightly as you leant forward to grab your goblet. 

“I taught her everything she knows.” Aemond says this as he looks to his nephew, that smug feeling returning again as his nephew sneers. That’s right, I made her cum long before you. 

When he glances back to you, the conversation moving away from him finally, you are already staring at him once again. This time your eyes are hooded, and he knows that you caught on to his jab. 

“I believe I taught you a few useful tricks myself.” You whisper, before turning away to talk to the person on your right. 

His entire body is aflame at the memories and a harsh anger rises in him. Of course you would do this, marry his nephew then rub it in his face. 

You had led him on. You had tore him up as though it was nothing.

Late night, and passing, mention it flipped her

Best friend, who knows saying maybe it slipped

But the slip turns to terror and a crush to light

When she walked in, he froze up, believe its the fright

You ignored his existence the rest of dinner, not that Aemond minded because he got many opportunities to glance at you this way. 

He watched the way you fixed your hair and the way your hand caresses the bodice of your dress when you bring it back down. He looks at the exposed part of your neck before his eyes catch on the pulse point. 

How easy it would be to just lean over and bite you the way he knows you like. How easy it would be to reach his hand up your skirt and- Your eyes cast to him before he can finish the thought and he soon realizes that everyone is staring at him.

“I apologize, I seem to have dazed off.” He rushes out, trying not to get embarrassed under your gaze. “I do not feel well, I believe I should return to my chambers.”

Before anyone could argue his request he is out of the chair, burning through the room and heading to his own chambers across the keep. It was uncomfortable to walk due to the aching hard on he now wore, and he was desperate to make it to his rooms to fix this problem.

He felt like a stupid fool. You probably barely thought of him, and here he was pining after you. Pining after the traitor.

By the time he pushes the door to his chambers his chest is heaving and every piece of him feels as though it is on fire.  Ragged breaths consumed him as his fingers worked to tear off his leathers. 

“Fuck.” He curses, when his finger snags on the leather of his riding pants, hopping out of his boots to hop on the bed. His back hits the cushion of it and he stares at the ceiling for a moment so he could calm down and focus.

He could not think about you. He hated you. You betrayed him and he hated you-

Before he could stop himself he reached down, a moan slipping from his lips as he touched himself, your face flashing in his mind. No no no. This was wrong and he hated you. 

But that didn’t stop him from sitting up, working himself faster as he imagined you above him, moaning to him just as you used to at the speed you liked- fuck Y/n. fuck fuck fu-

Y/n.

You were there. In the doorway with wide eyes and a blush on your cheeks as he stopped short, a ragged whine passing his lips when he realized. 

Its cute in a way, till you cannot speak

And you leave to have a cigarette, your knees get weak

An escape is just a nod and a casual wave

Obsessed about it, heavy for the next two days

“I wasn’t…” The lie begins to slip from his lips before he can stop it, but halfway through he realizes that he shouldn’t have to lie. You had seen him do this countless times, how was today different? 

You were married. And you shouldn’t be here.  “Leave.”

“I’m sorry.” You whisper, eyes welling up as you take a step back before you turn. Only you don’t leave, when your hand touches the door you risk a glance over your shoulder to where he is still sitting, still completely bare to you. “I’m sorry you hate me.”

“I’m not.” He sneers, face heating as your eyes track across his body. “You are a lying whore.”

“Indeed.”

“And you took everything I gave you and threw it away.”

“If that’s what you believe.”

You stared, unmoving, as he stood and walked closer. Everything in him screamed to pull you close and he was infuriated that even after all this time he still craved your touch. He still dreamt of having you in his sheets just as you used to. 

“You should leave.” He whispers, his chest meeting yours as he looks down on you, hands clenched at his sides to keep from grasping them in your hair like he wanted. 

“I should.” You reply, leaning your nose up to touch against his. The second your skin meets his he is gone, hands whipping up to your hair as he pulls you in for a rough and ragged kiss. 

It's only just a crush, it'll go away

It's just like all the others it'll go away

Or maybe this is danger and he just don't know

You pray it all away but it continues to grow

Maybe if he just got you out of his system it would be better. He could hate you from a distance after this and everything would be fine.  But the moment his lips touch your own he knows he is a goner. 

A warmth bleeds through his chest as you kiss back, your hands wrapping around to pull him closer by his back and he pushes you both forward until you are pressed against the door. A grunt pushes through him when his hands travel your body, lifting your skirt to touch the back of your thighs and help you hop up. 

Tearing yourself away to catch your breath gives him a moment to stare at you, the smug feeling returning once again. “Where is your husband?”

“Don’t ask.” You gasp, pulling him back in for another kiss. He stabilizes you both so you can reach and undo your corset, biting his lip harshly and making him groan out. 

“I hate you-” 

“I hate you more.” He enjoyed the way you gasped that out, allowing him to suck at your neck as both of you begin grinding into each other. “Aemond please-”

“Please what?”

I want to hold you close

Skin pressed against me tight

Lie still, and close your eyes girl

So lovely, it feels so right

“Aemond.” You try again, leaning to catch his head in your hands and pull him up to face you. “I’m so-”

“That’s not what I want to hear and you know it.” He seethes, pushing your skirt up higher. “I don’t want to hear your fake fucking apologies.”

And then the dam breaks and you are rushing forward to kiss him again, your teeth clash against each other and you bite down harshly before pulling back, eyes hooded. “Then fuck me. Fuck me like you hate me.”

I want to hold you close

Soft breasts, beating heart

As I whisper in your ear

I want to fucking tear you apart

He doesn’t waste any time, dragging you both to the bed and slamming you across the sheets, laying on top of you with a fire in his eyes and a smirk on his lips. “This is familiar.”

A small laugh tears from your throat when he grips your corset and tears it in half, growling a bit as he moves to your skirt. The sound of cloth ripping fills the room and you sit up quickly, snatching the eye patch off his face before he can fight it. 

A hand wraps around your wrist tightly, dragging the patch back. “No. I want to see you, Aemond.” You argue, keeping your arm tight as he grunts out before finally letting go. 

He can’t argue that,  nor can he argue the proud feeling he gets from those words, instead he crawls up your body until you are nose to nose. You smile at him and for a moment he can imagine himself back to the moments you used to have, before you were married off. 

“Breathe.” He whispers, just like he always had, before he is pushing himself into you. A groan escapes him at the same time you gasp out, hands scratching along his back as he fills you fully and for the first time in a long time he felt at home,

It disgusted him. 

“I hate you.”

“Then show me.” You laugh and he gives in. 

Then he walked up and told her, thinking that he'd passed

And they talked and looked away a lot, doing the dance

Her hand brushed up against his, she left it there

Told him how she felt and then they locked in a stare

The room filled with grunts and the heavy sound of skin slapping, Aemonds hands landing on the bed above both your shoulders to keep you trapped close to him as his hips snapped into you over and over. 

“You’re…..a….fucking whore-” He seethes, grunting louder as you moan out. “A fucking traitor.”

He laughs when you come undone, moving to lean down closer and press his nose to your cheek when you turn away. “I’m not done yet.”

They took a step back, thought about it, what should they do

'Cause there's always repercussions when you're dating in school

But their lips met, and reservations started to pass

Whether this was just an evening or a thing that would last

He takes you over and over, telling himself each time would be the last, but he couldn’t get enough. It was like a beast that had been let out of its cage and was ravaging anything it possibly could. 

By the time he had his fill, 5 rounds later when the sun began coming up, he let you sleep beside him as he kept you close. His hand laid on your thigh as you curled yourself up, breathing evenly as you dreamt. 

Just one more kiss and he would be good. He would be rid of this craving, he swears it. 

But when his lips touched your forehead very softly he closed his eyes and held them there, mentally begging himself to just get up and never touch you again. He hates you. 

“A traitorous whore.” You murmur, eyes still closed, and his eyebrows pop up in surprise. “That’s what you are thinking. I know it.”

“Am I wrong?”

“I hate you.”

“I know.”

Either way he wanted her and this was bad

He wanted to do things to her it was making him crazy

Now a little crush turned into a like

And now he wants to grab her by the hair and tell her

You left the next morning in one of his tunics, with a limp in your step that had his heart beating quickly but he ignored it, holding a hand to his chest to try and stop it. 

When the door shuts he turns back to the bed, shoving his nose in the pillow you had slept and and imagined if you could stay, if you had married him instead. 

Pathetic.

I want to hold you close

Skin pressed against me tight

Lie still, and close your eyes girl

So lovely, it feels so right

The halls were filled with people cheering and wearing flower crowns, the courtyard filled with twice as much music. 

Aemond sat under the tree feeling sick and angry. 

They were celebrating you, or rather your child. The news had passed quickly that you had begun your labors in the early hours of the day, with Rhaenyra by your side and your ‘devoted husband’. 

“Brother!” Helaena calls, snapping him out of his moping. “Come!”

Ever the attentive brother he stands, moving to follow her through the halls as she holds her baby in her hands. She talks his ear off as they join their mother, her face pulled into a tight frown. 

The two ladies lead him to Rhaenyras chambers, where you are laid out on the bed with sweat covering your skin and a small bundle in your arms. Rhaenyra is giving you the widest smile he has ever seen his sister give and many people are congratulating Jahaerys. 

“Have you heard the good news?” A Lord asks, leaning in to whisper to Aemond. “Lady Y/n has delivered a Targaryen. White hair and all.”

Memories of your last night flash together, of Jahearys asking you about a plan and you showing up to his rooms. 

A wide smile covers his face when he looks up to find you already staring at him, a knowing and tired look on your own features. Oh, how he hated you. 

[sheloves-toomuch]

Chapter VIII WIP: Out of the Hells

In this chapter, we discover just how far Orin is willing to go to get revenge on the sister she despises- even if it means taking her place in Astarion's mind.

Content warning: Adult themes, suggestive and explicit content, fantasy violence, and memories of Astarion's past trauma. Orin the Red's shapeshifting antics and manipulation.

As always please let me know what you think of this work in progress- what you liked and didn't like, and what you hope to see in the rest of the story. I didn't proofread just yet, just posted it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amidst all his turbulent inner thoughts and the uncomfortable emotions that were chasing him tonight, Astarion turned his eyes to the water beneath the glowing moon on the wide open beach. The waves danced upward as if to reach towards the stars, begging for the chance to take flight in the night sky.

"A bird may love a fish, but where would they live?"

Astarion despised the feelings within his chest now, the feelings that he had repressed and hidden away for two hundred years. Anger and resentment muddied any semblance of respite he tried to chase this evening- and he felt that the progress he had made in coming to terms with his simple plan was dashed now.

But he was feeling, after all. For the first time in two centuries he was feeling. He wasn't mindlessly and soullessly pacing the streets at night in his endless hunt for his master- his otherworldly hunger eating away at his will to go on for another moment.

Just as his eyelids began to grow heavier, he noted something stirring within the shallow waters in front of him. His eyes snapped open and he could have sworn his undead heart did a flip in his chest. The crystalline ripples of the water that had been crashing onto the sand parted slightly to reveal a familiar face.

"Zenosyne?" he called out.

"Astarion."

"What are you doing?" He asked, and inwardly chiding himself for the silly question. Of course she wanted to be in the water, for her own sake. The siren craved the sea, naturally.

"Oh, Astarion." She called again, gesturing calmly for him to join her.

Her hands reached out towards him as she emerged from the sea- her skin glowing with the blues and greens of the evening sky and the setting sun. She looked the same, but different. She didn't wear the colorful beads that often adorned her chest, but black pearls gathered around her beckoning form instead. Some of the strands loosely hung from her neck, and some sat tightly on her wet skin- the flesh underneath sensuously begging to be set free. He let his eyes wander for a moment. He wanted to pull at the pearls and watch as the strands broke into a million pieces under his grip, like stars erupting from the heavens only to reveal what he desired beneath.

"Oh, Astarion what?" He asked incredulously. He rolled his eyes with feigned annoyance. The siren's attention was fixed on him still, each movement he made studied by her eager eyes. He walked up to the shore where she lay now, and stood over where she rested out in the shallows. His eyes darted back and forth between hers', trying to ascertain whether or not the dark urges had been settling in her mind again. She did seem different somehow, but it was not the dark urges that he saw in her far-off gaze.

The siren reached up to him again, her hands running over his sand covered torso. She kneeled with her shimmering tail still partly beneath the waves, and the water pooled around them both with bubbling foam. When each wave crashed up onto the shore, it crashed into their bodies- pushing and pulling them in every direction. It was as if the sea were pulling him closer to her with each rushing tide.

"I can see this very scene being the cover of our spicy little novel." He jested, hoping to rouse a giggle from her. She seemed utterly serious, and he wanted to see if he could chip away at that hardened exterior of hers' once again.

She didn't blink an eye- but a tiny hint of confusion was evident in her countenance. She didn't seem to dwell on this, though, pulling on his arms with more force than she had ever used before when toying playfully with him.

Astarion fell down onto his knees along with her now, the water splashing violently into their faces- his silver hair now wet and clinging to his pale neck. He felt that sensation again- the one where he thought his undead heart might be beating again as she grasped his face with dominant resolve.

He wasted no more time, and his hands pulled gently at the black pearls that were between her skin and his. He pressed his chest up against hers' for leverage, and let his knuckles pale as he wrapped his fingers around the glistening strands with more force. It brought her chest upwards and forced her shoulders back, her face tilted to the sky.

"Say the word." He whispered. His lips were inches from Zeno's, and his fists remained tightly wrapped around her pearl top.

"Please."

[lilypadlys]

Wardrobe Malfunction

Dew wakes up one morning to find all his clothes missing. All of his regular clothes that is. The only things left in his wardrobe are a crop top, miniskirt, and thigh highs. Sunshine gives him a choice. It’s wear those or go naked.

Characters: Dewdrop, Sunshine

Word Count: 1,367

Rating: Teen (Dew has a foul mouth)

Tags: SFW, Dewdrop and Sunshine are chaos incarnate, Dewdrop in a miniskirt what else could you want?

Below the cut or on AO3

Dew thought it’d be funny to sneak a live cockroach into Sunshine’s dresser. It was hilarious as it turns out. She only found the insect in her bra after she’d put it on. Her scream could be heard across the abbey. What was not amusing, however, was his current predicament.

Like any normal morning, Dew rolls out of bed in only his underwear, as he prefers to sleep. He pads sleepily over to his dresser and pulls open a drawer in pursuit of a t-shirt and shorts. A shirt eludes him, the drawer empty. In his drowsy state he assumes he’d forgotten this week’s call for laundry and was simply out of clean tees. When his shorts drawer is similarly vacant however, he starts to get suspicious.

When he finds his sock drawer ransacked he begins to get worried. His fears are confirmed when the only thing present in his underwear drawer is a folded piece of paper. He picks it up and unfolds it. The scent of ripe peaches and citrus is a dead give away but his clothing thief is kind enough to identify herself.

Hey Dewy!

It was really sweet how you decided to put a live bug in my bra drawer last week. Remember that? Well you're probably wondering where your clothes went. Don’t worry, I stashed them somewhere safe. If you want them back just come find me and I’ll tell you where they are. Sunny :)

P.S. Check the bag in the bottom of your closet.

Dew groans. If he was more self aware, he would figure that he probably deserved pay back. Instead, he puts his energy towards plotting revenge as he opens his closet. Just like his dresser, all his clothes are gone. Sunny had even absconded with his shoes. The only thing left is a small shopping bag in the right corner. He scoops it up and begins rifling through only to groan again.

“I’m going to end her!” He yells. In the bag is a crop top, miniskirt, and thigh high socks. And another note.

Thought you might not want to go naked so I left you a few things. Of course, you can go without but you might get your clothes back sooner if you do wear them. Just sayn!

“How thoughtful.”

Dew nearly chucks the clothes back in the closet but realizes wearing them is really his only good choice. At least this way, no one would tattle on him to Imperator for running around the abbey in his underwear.

If he was quick enough, he could hopefully avoid most of the ghouls, retrieve his clothes, change, and be at breakfast before anyone missed him.

If only it was that easy.

Dew gets dressed and chances a look in the mirror.

“Satanas, I’m dragging her back to the pit myself.”

The clothes fit well, all turning out to be his size. Based on the smell of generic detergent and starch, they must have been recently bought. The outfit was even coordinated, all black and red. It managed to look like a cheerleading uniform from hell. Sunny had planned this

Redoubling his plans for vengeance, Dew carefully opens his door a crack and pokes his head out. The coast is clear. He darts out into the hall and takes off in a mad dash towards Sunny’s room.

He doesn’t bother to knock, just barges in.

“Sunshine!” He roars.

The room is empty. The only thing that stops him from ransacking her room in search of his clothes is the note perched on her bed spread.

See you at breakfast!

Sunny is likely waiting in the ghoul’s kitchenette, hoping to embarrass him in front of everyone at once, Dew assumes. He stomps his way over, preparing for the snickers and teasing that is surely to follow. To his surprise, the ghoul common room is empty. When he steps into the kitchen he finds only Aether. The quintessence ghoul raises a brow at Dew’s appearance but doesn't say anything.

“Have you seen Sunny?” Dew grumbles, arms crossed over his chest. When he notices Aether appraising him with his gaze, he shifts his arms to cover his bare midriff instead.

“Good morning to you too, Dew.” Aether says, brow raised. “Coffee?” He holds out Dew’s favorite mug.

Dew grumpily accepts it and takes a sip. “Thanks.”

“I like your fashion choices today.” Aether hides his smile by taking a sip from his own mug. “Branching out?”

“Ha ha. Very funny. So Sunshine?”

“Hmm.” Aether taps his chin, feigning a pondering expression. “Maybe try the chapel?”

“Why do I not believe you?”

Aether just shrugs and smirks. “Just a suggestion.”

Seeing that he isn’t going to help further, Dew makes to leave.

Aether snaps his fingers. “Oh wait! I just remembered. Sunny asked me to give you this.” He holds out a folded note which Dew quickly snatches.

Catch me if you can!

Dew glares at Aether.

Aether holds up his hands, palms out. “Hey, I’m only the messenger.”

Dew turns and storms out.

“Good luck!” Aether calls from behind.

And so begins the chase. Dew spends the day pacing back and forth across the abbey. He manages to run into every one of his band mates except for Sunshine. They all conveniently had “just run into Sunny”. Around stifled snickers they would imply that if he hurried, he could catch up to her. Unfortunately for Dew, their instructions always lead to having to pry further dubious directions from another of his pack mates when he “just barely missed her.”

Several times he strays from the suggested pathing to check Sunny’s usual haunts; the common room, the garden, that one chair in the library, but she was nowhere.

It wasn’t until everyone, ghouls, siblings, clergy members, poor confused Copia, even Sister Imperator, had gotten an eyeful of Dew that Sunny magically reappeared.

As the sun begins to set, Dew wanders into the ghoul common room in defeat. Everybody had already seen and laughed at him. What was a little more teasing if he could at least curl up on the couch and drown his sorrows in movie night?

As he walks in however, all his frustrations reignite. Everyone is present. Actually, everyone this time. Perched on the rug, ensconced in a blanket like she had been there all day, was none other than Sunshine.

“Where the fuck have you been!” Dew shouts.

“Who me?” Sunny giggles innocently.

Dew just stands there in the doorway and fumes; trying to look intimidating. The effect is somewhat dampened by his obvious discomfort. His outfit, and specifically his right sock, bunched around his shin even after tugging it back up all day, fully spoils it.

Everybody finally loses it. After spending all day watching Dew wander in circles and holding back their giggles, the laughter finally wins out.

“Thanks, thanks you guys.” Dew grumbles.

“It’s just,” Swiss fights to suppress his laughter. “You look so pretty today Dew.”

Everyone laughs harder as Dew’s face turns dusty violet.

“Come here Dew” Sunny beckons, making a grabbing motion with her outstretched hands “We only tease you cause we love you.”

“You have a funny way of showing it.” He grouses even as he stomps over and joins her on the floor.

“Your clothes are all under your bed by the way.” Sunny whispers. “They’ve been there the whole time.”

He recoils. “What?! How?”

The giggle fit starts anew.

“Why else did Rain suddenly have a really important thing to show you last night?” Sunny manages between laughs

“Rain!”

“Don’t yell at me Dewy.” Rain chides. “You got yourself into this mess all on your own.”

“You should be ashamed of yourselves. All of you.” Dew pouted.

“You're one to talk, mister cockroach in the bra drawer.”

Dew just huffs and leans into Sunny.

“I’m surprised you’re not running to change? Not that I’m complaining.” Sunny wraps an arm around Dew, tracing her fingers over his exposed midriff.

Dew hesitates but finally speaks. “I see why you like these types of clothes. They're kinda comfy.”

“Hehe.”

“Plus…” He flushes an even deeper purple. “I do feel a little bit pretty.”

Sunny grins and kisses his cheek. “Good.”

[nihilara]

HSR VOICE LINES: KURO & MIMI. once an emanator of yaoshi, kuro is a shell of his former self. skirting along the cosmos with his companion mimi, one of the hyper intelligent and near extinct species of cat - like creatures, known as the felista.

kuro is classified as the hunt, and does imaginary damage.

kuro is blue and mimi is pink

FIRST MEETING:  name's kuro nice to meet you. i uh... don't really do very much. worth noting that is.   nonsense. kuro you'd do well to be more cat - like sometimes. take pride in the fact you do very little of late.

GREETING:  sup, you need... help with something? mimi and i can handle it.   prrrrp!

PARTING:  *kuro & mimi yawn* we done? if so im gonna go lay down for a bit.

ABOUT SELF, APPEARANCE:   what...? do i look that bad?   your shirt is undone, and your hair is unbrushed.  ohh... oops. i tend to forget sometimes, not that it matters. i'm not trying to look nice for anyone in particular so...

ABOUT SELF, MIMI:   mimi? she's my best friend.  i thought she was a run of the mill cat for the longest time. turns out she's the last of her species. we've both kind of saved eachother, isn't that right?   couldn't of put it better myself, kuro. we're both a bit out of place. but i am truly grateful to have you with me in these difficult times.

CHAT, YAOSHI:   th-the aeon of abundance...? i know about as much as anyone else does. what... did you think my being an emanator before... helped me understand them? i really don't. they wish to rid the world of suffering, and death.  but even the best medicine can become poison, when applied too liberally. 

CHAT, XIANZHOU:   my history with the xian/zhou people... is complicated. i feel guilty for what i've done, and wish something could be done about their circumstances--  but it was their ancestors that asked for immortality. and yaoshi gave it to them.   well said, kuro. be sure to remember, you cannot change the past. but you do not need to let it ruin your future.

CHAT, IPC:   mrrow!! a dreadful corperation! invasive, manipulative, greedy! they took my home for resources, and believed us worth nothing more than common cats. tsk!    yeah. i'm pretty bias on this... but big companies like that. trying to get their hands in everything. i'm with mimi on this. 

HOBBIES:   uhhh...  does sleeping count?   again, credit where it is due, kuro. he is a wonderful cook, he seems at his happiest when making meals for others, mya!    but i love sleeping too...

ANNOYANCES:   immortality is, and will always be, a curse. what's the point of life, if there is no end?   mrr...?

SOMETHING TO SHARE:  you can tell a lot about a cat's mood, and what they're feeling by their tails. they're incredibly honest animals, if you know how to read them.   prrr...

KNOWLEDGE:  yaoshi's goal isn't inherently bad. see, the aeons don't care about good and evil, they don't care about us. their only desire is to perpetuate whatever concept, or ideal they embody. no matter who, or what it hurts. 

ABOUT JING YUAN:  best if our paths never crossed again. though knowing my luck, it's bound to happen.   i just hope he's had a bit of time to cool off after your dashing escape, nyehehe!

ABOUT BLADE:  i can't be mad about the animosity he has towards me. thankfully though he's courteous enough to not try anything when mimi's in the way.   hmph.

ABOUT DR. RATIO:  i've seen him and mimi having conversations before. i really don't bother listening in or interrupting, they look like they're enjoying themselves.   i care for you deeply kuro, but sometimes i am in need of more...  stimulating conversation.

ABOUT ARGENTI:  i can say with confidence that argenti is a friend. we've crossed paths more than once. he's odd, eccentric... but he's a good person.   and he spoils me rotten, nya~  he's selfless, beautiful, and chivelrous. you could learn a thing or two from your friend, kuro.  

ABOUT BOOTHILL:   revenge? against the IPC? an admirable goal, prrr.  it will not be easy, their influence is vast, and the things they're willing to do for their own advantage? truly wishing him the best with his mission.   yeah, what she said.

EIDOLON ACTIVATION:  ohh that's neat.

CHARACTER ACENSION:  excellent work kuro, keep it up.

MAX LEVEL:  so can i go take a nap now?

TRACE ACTIVATION:  phew, looking pretty good...

ADDED TO THE TEAM WITH JING YUAN:  no hard feelings about my escape, right? ah? ... oh...  

ADDED TO THE TEAM WITH RATIO:  you can also talk to me, i hope you know that.  afraid i might run away?

ADDED TO THE TEAM WITH ARGENTI:  good to see you again, argenti. and in one piece no less.

ADDED TO THE TEAM WITH BOOTHILL:  all you really need is a horse huh...

bonus

ABOUT KEVAH:  mimi really likes him, so i like him too. i was... admittedly very surprised to see so many sketches of myself in his book. it's kind of flattering. am i that nice to look at?   prrp...

ABOUT SUNDAY:  is it insulting so say he reminds me of myself in some way? i don't want to say too much. but i can't help pity him, and the situation he's in.   the entirety of the dream hotel seems to be in a bad way. hmph.

I WILL ADD MORE AS I PLOT WITH FOLKS. THIS IS UNFINISHED!

[thelefty23]

A colleague's revenge (F/F)

Hi all, this is a story I wrote a long time ago as a request. It's the only one of the dozen or so I've written that I've shared, and is probably the tamest of all of them. Depending on how much I freak out having posted it, I might post some of the others.

A warning: this story does involve someone being made to sneeze via a hidden allergen. I have marked where that starts in the story; so if you don't like/are offended by that, please bail out of reading at that point.

Thank you for reading it. Feedback very much welcomed, and if there's follow up ideas you'd like to see me play with, drop me a DM.

Let's get to it...

Monday morning: the day Jo had been waiting seemingly forever for. It had been 6 months since she had taken on her new finance role, but to Jo, it felt far longer. 6 long months to correct the wrongs of her predecessor and put up with the "morons" as she called them. The brunette paced around her bedroom, stretching as she did so. Today was the day.

Today she was to meet the board of directors, presenting her findings about the team. “Incompetent to a man” she mused to nobody in particular.

Her thought was interrupted as she raised an eyebrow slightly feeling her throat scratching as she swallowed, and her nose twitching slightly. To her immediate horror she realised that she must have left a window open the night before, and rushed to close it- she couldn't afford for her allergies to bad today. She drew her blinds to be confronted by what most people would have called another beautiful spring day, but then again most people didn't have Jo's allergies.

Her head jolted back as the tickling in her nose intensified, as each individual grain of pollen seemed to delight in tormenting her. Her ice-blue eyes began to close as her sizable chest heaved “iieeehhh” her eyes re-opened slightly in quizzical fashion, wondering if her sneeze would come, with the feeling of a million tiny grains terrorising her nose “”IIIEEEHHH” she gasped as one hand groped trying to close the window whilst the other searched for one of the tissue boxes she had left on her bedside table. Thankful for her tall, slender frame she got a hold off both at once, and not a moment soon, as her nose finally gave in to the incessant tickling “IIIIEEEEESSSSSHHH” she yelled her first ferocious sneeze, partially spraying the now closed window. Her throat immediately sore, she dived back towards her bed, snatching another handful of tissues from the box en route and continued to try to expel the pollen from her increasingly reddening nose. “iiieeesssshh, iieeesssshhheewww, iiieesssssshhhewww” she was now facing down towards her pillows, with her wad of tissues catching her seemingly relentless sneezes. Her eyes began to tear slightly as she threw her long hair back taking a sharp intake of breath which felt mostly like inhaling fine feathers for the amount it tickled her nose “”ooohhh goooiiiiieeeesshhhh, iiiieeessshhh, iieeeeeessshhhh, iiiiieeesshhhh, iiieeeshhhhh, iiiieeessshhhhhh, ccaanniiieeeshhhh ssttotoiiiieeessshhhh iiiieeessssshhhh, iiiiesssshhhh”

Finally, her sneezes subsided, her throat raw and her slim nose red, and she headed to the bathroom with yet more tissues in hand just in case. Staring at her reddened eyes in the mirror she righted herself, let a further harsh “IIIEEESSSSHH” escape into her tissues and began to get ready for her big day.

Returning to her room after her shower, her eyes still bloodshot, and her throat still sore, Jo picked out her favourite black skirt and suit combination and prepared to head to the office. Grabbing a few tissues as she headed for the door, she pressed them to her nose as she made a dash for her car. She fumbled her key as her nose began tickling ever so slightly. Jo was becoming increasingly frantic; trying to get in the car before the pollen overtook her- she certainly didn’t want to start another of her epic sneezing fits in her work clothes. “oh no” she uttered to herself as her keys fell to the ground. At that moment her eyes began tearing once more, as she noticed the morning breeze had not only taken plenty of pollen into the air, but seemingly coated her car and parking space. Realising she was now breathing heavier through her panic, acceptance of her fate dawned upon her. “ooooh haaavv ttoooo ssnneeeeezzeeee” she gasped as her breath hitched wildly, filling her already troubled nose with yet more pollen, she tried rubbing it to relieve the incessant tickling, but it was to no avail as her notoriously long build-ups continued “iieeeeehhhhhhh hiiii hiiii hhhiiiiiiieeeessssssshhh, hiiiesssssshhh iiiissshhhewwww iiiissshhhewww iiiissssheeeww nooiiissssshhheewwww oh iiisssshhheewww iiiiisssssheeeew” Her tissues now increasingly useless, she dropped them to the floor, rummaging in her bag for ones she knew she put in their the night before, sneezing all the while, “iiiissshhhewwww iiisssshhheww iiisshhhewwwww” she sprayed left and right, finally grasping the tissues to catch the final volley “iiisssshhhewwwww iiiisssshhheww HHHIIIISSSSHHHHEWWWW” she yelled the final sneeze, as her blurry and reddened eyes finally reopened, as she clenched her keys defiantly, angered by her loss of control. She entered the car, got a glimpse of herself in the mirror, which only served to make her angrier, she took a breath to chastise herself, but immediately realised her mistake as her nose reacted fiercely “ihhhssshhhewwww iiiiihhhssshhhewww iiiihhhshhhewww iiiiiiihhh?” The last sneeze hung in the air as Jo, with head titled back, pleaded silently for release “iiiiiihhhhhsssshhhhhewwwww” she left her head buried in her tissues for a few moments, hoping that her latest allergy attack was over.

Thankful that she prided herself on being the first to the office, and for the additional time that gave her for incidents such as these, she began the short drive to work, having placed a further wad of tissues in her lap for the inevitable sneezes that would accompany her en route. Sure enough, the first set of traffic lights she came to, the constant tickling her nose was enduring scaled higher and her build ups began, much to Jo’s dismay “ooohhh nnnoooott aaaggaaaaiiiiiiiihhhh iiiihhhsssshhhhhewwww, iihhhssshhhhewwwww ihhsshhhhhewwww iiiihhhhsshhhhheeeewww iiihhhsssshhhewwww” as her right hand held the tissues to her face, her left plucked more from seat beside her, as she moved beyond the lights, head bobbing as she continued her fit.

Pulling into her car parking space, Jo steeled herself. "I'm done with allergies." She told herself. Pressing the last of her tissues across her aching nose, she quickly made her way into the relatively safety of her air-conditioned office, thankful for the closed windows. Finally now she could prepare herself for her big meeting, and forget about her ridiculous allergies.

Reviewing her team’s latest efforts only served to further Jo’s dislike of her team, they just didn’t seem to get what she was saying. “Out with the old and in with the new” she once again muttered into the silence surrounding her. She got up and began pacing around her luxurious office, perfecting her already seamless presentation. Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted the first few people entering the office, with Katy, one of her team, amongst them. The fiery redhead strode into the office, grinning from ear to ear.

“Finally” Jo proclaimed, and marched towards Katy, ready to confront her about the apparent substandard quality of her work. As she approached however, Jo felt her nose twitch and her breath began hitching. Pausing slightly, Jo rubbed her nose furiously as she attempted to relieve the tickle. “Cow” she thought to herself, “she’s deliberately wearing the perfume I’m allergic to” – there was never any need of proof to Jo in this mood.

(Being made to sneeze via a hidden allergen beyond this point).

“Katy, what have I told you about presenting figures which are simply guesswork? Iiiihhhh I caaahh caant keehhheep doing thhhiiiiiiiis” Jo just about managed to get out, but the need to sneeze was rapidly overtaking her, which clearly wasn’t lost on Katy.

Katy had just about had enough of her snooty boss, for whom nothing was apparently ever good enough. Katy quite enjoyed her boss’ weakness, and was keen to exploit it as much as possible. Knowing how strongly Jo reacted to her perfume the last time she wore it, she decided it was time to give it another outing particularly after yesterday’s fierce encounter.

“Can’t keep doing what, Jo? Sneezing madly, or being irrational? Either way is fine by me” smirked Katy, impressed with her wit at this time in the morning.

“Oh go to heeeeeeiiissshhheeewww hell you meeeeeeessshhhhewwww messy cow” sniped Jo between sneezes.

“Ha, you calling me messy, now that’s irony for you” laughed Katy, very much enjoying her boss’ plight.

Jo wanted to fight back but was incapacitated but the allergic reaction bought on by Katy’s perfume. Her eyes were stinging and her nose overflowing, so she beat a hasty retreat back to the relative sanctity of her office, sneezing all the while. She slumped into her chair, plucked a handful of tissues from her desk and unloaded a barrage of sneezes, desperately trying to rid her nose of the latest allergen to attack her. “Ohhhhh no noooooot aagggiiiiisssshhhewwww iiisshhhewww iissssshhheewww issshhhewww, iiiisssshhhheeewwwww caannttiisssshhhewwww sttoooooiissshhhhewww sneeiiiiiisssshhheeewwww sneeziiiissshhhewwww” Her beautiful brown her flew with each sneeze that ripped through her body. Her sneezes finally subsided, as she removed her face from her crumpled tissues. Further increasing her ire the first thing Jo saw as she looked her was Katy’s smug, smiling face: she was sure she’d worn that scent deliberately.

Katy was so pleased with how her morning had gone so far, her perfume had the desired effect, and now it was time for stage 2 of her plan. Heading back down to her car, she grabbed the bouquet of lilies which Jo had reacted to strongly when one of the girls received them as an anniversary present. Her plan was simple, make Jo lose control during her big presentation, and maybe teach her a little humility. Hiding the flowers behind her back, she moved quickly back into the office, and into the secluded meeting room at the end of the corridor.

Entering quietly so as not to arouse suspicion, she shook the flowers around the room, trying to spread the pollen as widely as possible. Noticing that Jo had obviously beaten her to it and attempted to prepare as thoroughly as she could for the meeting by placing a fresh box of tissues at the head of the table, Katy decided to get even more devious. Taking a couple of the flower heads, she scraped as much of the orange pollen as she could and spread it between the first few tissues. “That ought to really set her off” She left the remainder of the flowers in the bin in the room, closed the door behind her and headed back to her desk, exchanging a few high-fives with team mates who were in on the plan and sat, anxious to see and her the results and impact on her uppity boss.

Jo meanwhile was blissfully unaware of all that was transpiring against her, as she went about regaining her composure, brushing herself down, picking up her notes and making her way down to the meeting room. Greeted by the three person board, she sat down, took a final calming breath and was about to begin her presentation. She instantly recognised the scent of the lilies, but steeled herself, determined that she wouldn’t lose it in this critical moment. “Ladies and gentlemen of the board, firstly let me thank you for appointing me into this position, and for giving me the opportunity to meet with you today” Her throat was beginning to scratch, so she took a moment to grab some water. Her heart was pounding heavily now, forcing her to breathe more heavily, inadvertently taking more irritating pollen into her increasingly tickling nose.

“My fiiiiihhhhh” Jo’s eyes squinted as her head titled back. She pinched her nose, shook her head and tried to press on “Sorry, my findings are siiiiihhhiiii” Her eyes were becoming increasingly bloodshot as they reacted strongly to the pollen floating all around her. “Sooooissshhhheww, iiissshhhewwww, iiisssshhhewwwww” she unleashed her first few sneezes, drawing looks of concern from the board who sat across from her, one of whom kindly pushed the box of tissues nearer Jo’s reach.

She virtually dived straight for them, pulling one out and burying her nose into it to catch her next volley “hhiiiissshhhewww iisshhhewww iissssheewww IIIIISSSHHHEWWW” this louder sneeze made the board recoil in surprise, but Jo wasn’t to notice as her sore eyes were kept shut as she waited to see if she was done for the moment.

Content that she was, Jo made the mistake Katy, who was now avidly listening just outside having heard the first of Jo’s sneezes, was hoping and praying for- she took a breath with the tissue still pressed to her nose. “Oh goooooood it’s cooooaaassshhhhew coaashsheww iiin iiiisssshhewww ppooliissshh poooisshhew, pollen” By this point Jo had discarded that tissue and grabbed a couple more from the box, sneezing relentlessly into them. The board were talking amongst themselves, trying to decide whether to watch the poor girl sneeze and sneeze, or whether to simply end the discussion there and then. “Look, Jo” began Amber, the Managing Director, and Jo’s direct superior, “Now clearly isn’t a good time, perhaps we’ll reschedule for a more suitable opportunity to discuss this”

The words seemed to scare of Jo’s sneezes temporarily, as she pleaded “Miss Dempsy please, I’b fibe, jusd a few sneezes, plead let me condinue” Her stuffed up voice was desperate at this point, and her reddened eyes were streaming almost as badly as her nose.

“As I was saying” Jo began, gulping back a sneeze in the process “My sneezes” Jo shook her head in horror, her allergies had gotten to her “excuse me, my findings are simple, the teeehhhh team I inherriiiiited are, oh I haaaavve to sneeeeezze aaggaaaiiiishhew iiiisshhhew” she snatched more tissues from the box on the table and continued her fit “I’iiisshhhhheww so iiissssshhhewwww sorriiiissshhhhewww, my alleeiiisshhheww, iiisssshhewww, iiishewww, caaniisshhewww sttoopiisshhew, issshhhewww, sneeiiisssshhewww.” Jo sneezed and sneezed, and the MD signalled she had seen enough and left, closely followed by her two associates, passing Katy in the corridor.

Katy was suddenly struck by a new feeling: pity. She really had only wanted Jo to be a bit nicer to her, not to cause her the allergic fit that she was now suffering. She entered the room taking the seat next to Jo, and putting her arm around, whispered softly into her ear “Hey, let me help you” Her response was fairly predictable: a barrage of sneezes “Thhaiiissshhewww, thhankiissshhheww yoiissshhhheww, iisshheww” Katy grabbed a wad of tissues, and blew Jo’s nose before helping her back to her office, where she witnessed yet more of Jo’s amazing sneezes