#sick in the good kind

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Fun fact about Lullaby for a Princess, someone made a song in response to it called Luna's Reply from Princess Luna’s pov. And if you look hard enough, you can find videos of both songs edited together as a duet.

That sounds kinda sick actually

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

[grntaire]

fun musical bit about this scene!:

the piece that the car is playing (the "classical music that stays classical music") is a tone poem, saint-saëns' danse macabre. it's a super famous piece that you've probably heard before and is associated with all things spooky. but it's not just spooky bc it sounds spooky: it's spooky bc it tells a story! a tone poem is a piece of music evokes a poem, short story, landscape, etc. in short, it's a piece of music that's describing or outlining something.

danse macabre tells the story of death, who every year on the stroke of midnight on halloween plays his fiddle to raise the dead. the dead dance for him until the following dawn, where they return to their graves until the next year. (musically it does a lot of cool things to reflect this: there's 12 notes at the beginning representing the 12 strokes of midnight, and the frequent use of a specific musical interval called the tritone. in the medieval period the tritone was also called diabolus in musica, literally meaning "the devil in music" bc of how dissonant it sounded to listeners at the time. it also quotes the dies irae chant as well!)

so the fact that it's what the car chose to play is SUPER cute. bc it's classical (technically it's from the romantic period, but w/e), like aziraphale wants, but it's also reminiscent of crowley. bc i bet the car knows just how much aziraphale loves crowley, too. it's a really subtle nudge that the car knows both of them and it's like the car is finding a musical middle for them both, almost.

it's also a subtly brilliant choice bc in the flashback prior, aziraphale said that crowley asked to meet aziraphale in the graveyard at midnight. just like death met the dead on halloween.

[deoidesign]

Hm... I'm feeling benevolent...

[microclown]

I've been stuck on viewing Maggie as Crowley's mirror, and for most of the show I like that interpretation. But once I started thinking of Nina as Crowley's Mirror in the ball scene specifically, I made a connection....

Aziraphale is playing God here. He has a vision- a happy romantic evening where people speak Victorian English, dress nicely, dance, and fall in love -and he wills everyone present to conform to his plan. But Nina doesn't conform. Nina feels like something isn't right. She asks questions.

She asks Aziraphale what's going on, why she doesn't feel sad when she knows she's sad, and Aziraphale doesn't give her a satisfactory answer. He tells her that the important thing is that she's here. She's here to play a role in his great plan. To dance in his ball.

So she expresses her concerns to Maggie. Maggie hadn't seen the issues at first, but she listens to Nina, and Nina gets her to acknowledge the absurdity of the situation just a little bit. Listen to their conversation at the dance again. It sounds SO MUCH like the conversations we've heard Crowley and Aziraphale have a thousand times during their 6000 year dance. Crowley calling out heaven, asking questions, trying to get Aziraphale to consider the absurdity of it all. Aziraphale mostly defending heaven, but listening, and sometimes acquiescing.

And this all falls in line with a point I've made before - In season 2, Crowley's relationship with Aziraphale begins to mirror his relationship with heaven. Aziraphale shows a pattern of not listening to Crowley the whole season, but especially in this scene. Crowley tries to ask him what is going on, and alert him to very real danger, but Aziraphale is dismissive. He is blinded by his desire to see his plan to fruition.

And just so we're clear, this is not an Aziraphale hate post. Rather, I think it might give us some insight into where God is coming from. Because Aziraphale's actions may be dismissive and controlling, but they are motivated by love. Misguided, certainly, but with all the best intentions. I have a feeling, when we finally meet God, it will be a similar story. And maybe both She and Aziraphale will learn that sometimes to love means to let go.

[ineffable-romantics]

Me @ me when Michael Sheen and/or David Tennant

[dogtheories]

"i love you" means i want to hurt you

"i love you" means i want you to hurt me

"i love you" means im human

"i love you" means i have a sickness that can't be cured

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 108

So this time it wasn’t Danny’s fault, or even Boxy’s fault! And it wasn’t like Pandora’s box was open for more than a split second! But uh, still. This could be a bit of a problem, what with how it’s affected um, well, everyone. Living and ghosts. 

At least it’s not dangerous! Really, how bad can people getting animal aspects be? Well, besides the embarrassment. 

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

thinking abt these two again. i need to be sedated

knight!sugu who sacrifices you to save the world thinking he has no other choice. who instantly becomes enveloped by a guilt so heavy it crushes him.

prince!gojo who sacrifices the world to save you with a smile on his face. who tells you to find him in your next life as he watches the stars go out one by one.

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Skin to Skin: Baby and the Bees

One week after Yang and Ruby brought an orphaned baby Faunus back to their safehouse in Vacuo.

Baby: (completely flush and shivering, lethargic, and whimpering)

Blake: Mom, I'm really starting to worry about her. Is there anything we can do?

Kali: Unfortunately, babies can't have most pharmaceutical medications, and I've already tried every holistic remedy I know.

Yang: So, there's literally nothing we can do?

Blake: (strokes the baby's cheek)

Kali: (watches as the baby wiggles her head weakly, almost like she's trying to keep the hand on her face) ....I have an idea, and honestly I'm a little upset I didn't think of it sooner. Some mother I am.

Blake & Yang: What is it?!

Kali: Blake, dear, take off your shirt, please?

Blake: (blinks with a blush) Excuse you?

Kali: Take off your shirt.

Blake: .........You take off your shirt.

Kali: Dear, I don't think Yang would appreciate seeing her future mother-in-law topless.

Yang: (covers her eyes as a steaming red blush colors her entire face) Kali!

Blake: Mom! Y-Yang and I haven't even- W-We haven't-

Kali: Had sex? I'm honestly surprised by that. But, that's besides the point! This is to help the baby. Now (claps her hands) chop-chop! Off with the shirt!

Blake: (whining) Why???

Kali: Just trust the process, dear.

Blake: (groans) Fine! (takes off her shirt and stands awkwardly) Now what?

Yang: (eyes unconsciously zero in on Blake's almost naked torso)

Kali: Bra too.

Blake: MOM!!!

Yang: If this is how I die, I day a happy woman.

Blake: (gulps and slowly takes off her bra, quickly covering her breasts after dropping the garment) There! Now, what?! Are you going to tell me I need to lose my pants next???

Yang: (slowly sitting down to keep from fainting)

Kali: Hardly, that would be cruel. (picks up the baby, unwraps her from her swaddle blanket, and removes her clothes so she's in her diaper before gently pushing her into Blake's arms) Hold her against your breasts, dear. She needs skin to skin contact. Head up, good. Now, cradle the baby scrunch. Perfect.

Blake: (holding the baby tenderly against her chest as Kali tucks the blanket back around the baby) W-What now?

Kali: Just flash your aura a little bit, dear. Not too much. She won't be able to handle too much at once. She's still little.

Blake: Okay... (gently flashes her aura, causing the baby's own, bright orange aura to flash momentarily)

Baby: (stops whimpering and slowly nuzzles into Blake's chest with a little coo)

Blake:

Yang: (in complete aw) Is... Is she better?

Kali: She should be fine now, but keep the skin to skin up. (sighs) I cannot believe I forgot about the kangaroo hold. What kind of mother and grandmother am I?

Yang: (stands up and wraps a second blanket around Blake's shoulders) How are you doing?

Blake: I'm fine. It's just that... (glances at the sleeping baby pressed against her chest) This is a different feeling than I've had all week. I don't really know how to describe it.

Yang: Good or bad?

Blake: Good. (kisses Yang's cheek) Definitely good.

Link to Original Baby and the Bees

[allthepandasintheworld]

Maybe this is a hot take but Clark Kent is sexy specifically bc he’s really strong but chooses to be kind and gentle send tweet

[tomwambsgans]

yearning for another day, another time

[sapphorror]

Y'know... A lot of ZaDr fics have them either gradually drifting into a less contentious status quo or establishing a deeply bizarre multilayered dynamic that is nonetheless very consistent and beholden to its own rules—which works, to be clear, because slavish adherence to the rhythm of their endless 'game' is already their canon baseline.

WITH THAT BEING SAID. I think it would be very funny to depict a ZaDr dynamic in which they're like, on-again off-again nemeses. As they get older theyre gradually forced to acknowledge the true depth of their mutual attachment, but instead of actually improving themselves in any lasting way or compromising the conflicting elements into an ill-definable state of contentious codependence, they just start oscillating wildly between periods of obscenely clingy allyship and devotedly murderous enmity. There's never an in between. They'll dedicate all their energy to trying to horrifically torture each other to death, until one of them gets uncomfortably close to actually dying or an external crisis pushes them together or they just get bored—at which point, they become obnoxiously glued at the hip until one of them relapses into anxiety about their ambitions or an argument escalates past the the point of no return or they just get bored. And every time they both Really Mean It, They're Not Gonna Do This Anymore, before naturally going ahead and doing it again

[a-lonely-tatertot]

The qsmp fucks me up everytime i think ab it to hard honestly like these people (not just ccs like fans too!!) separated by such a large language barrier brought together by such an ambitious but like normal idea that a guy had has now created this group of people who are meeting up in fucking paris and talking about their fucking rp eggs like. This is such an insane community and i dont think ill ever stop being impressed by how much work and creativity that these players, admins and quackity have put into this like god this is so cool

[c-kiddo]

(scavengers reign spoilers)

something so gut wrenching about the scene when kamen launches his escape pod and at the last second realises fiona was trying to get in too . maybe its partly the voice acting and the quiet right after, im not sure, but it makes my stomach absolutely drop. but also kamen is selfish and doesn't even really think of others (doesnt even consider how isolated fiona might feel on a freighter spaceship when their relationship falls apart, because he's doing good at his job and going to keep his high ranking position or something.. going off course to deliver cargo faster and ordering people around (except for sam, who is above him) is all a power fantasy to him) but in that moment he's so suddenly clearly aware that he's killed fiona. like instantly regrets it, and theres absolutely nothing he can do. so extremely nothing he can do. he's hundreds of miles from her in an instant. and thats the basis of how he acts for the whole rest of the show - he hasn't rly thought about other people before or considered how his actions might effect them so when he has to do that he just shuts down and lets the hollow take over