#sirius is INCOMPLETE without him

[padfootastic]

Sunday Snippet

(is that a thing? idk but i literally just wrote this for FoD and it wont be posted for a few chapters--so a couple months minimum--but i just. really wanted to share it so. enjoy)

He casually points a finger at the hideous vase behind their heads, levitating it wandlessly and wordlessly. If he was around other wix, they would’ve been amazed and perhaps, slightly awed. That it was Muggles--and this particular set at that--meant they were almost vibrating out of their skin in fear. 

Good. 

“Do you know,” he started with a pleasant smile, bringing the floating vase closer to them, enjoying the way Petunia’s mouth opened in a wordless scream. He didn't even have to Silence them. “they thought I could kill 12 people, just like that, with one word. Not one person, not even my closest friends, believed otherwise.”

Once upon a time that statement would’ve hurt, it had hurt him everytime he was conscious enough to think about it in Azkaban. But he’d made his peace with it now, had accepted that there was a part of him that was inherently repulsive, untrustworthy, broken. 

“There was a reason for why they did that. My brother--you know him, James--was murdered. They thought I lost my mind, and perhaps I did, a little bit.” 

Because James was the last--and only--person who’d never turned away from him. He’d taken all of Sirius’ ugliness, all those rough edges he’d tried so hard to hide, cutting himself and the world in the process, and kept those with himself. Sirius never had to worry about himself around James, because he knew he’d take care of him. Wouldn’t let him break. 

At least, that’s how it should have been. They should’ve grown old together, stuck at the hip until their hearts and their magic gave out. James shouldn’t have been buried in the ground at the age of twenty fucking one while Sirius still had to live without him, god, it was so unfair. 

It was--

He shouldn’t be living without James. He was nothing without James. 

It was that thought that sent a fresh wave of anger through his veins, anger he knew was very plainly visible on his face, reflecting in his eyes, because the moment he looked at the Dursleys, he could hear two distinctive whimpers at once. 

“So,” he said, voice rough like gravel, almost unrecognisable to even him. He knew his eyes would be closer to black than their usual grey, the Madness stirring within him, wanting out. “What do you think I’ll do to people, to vermin like you, who touched my godson?” 

His only response was a slow, trickling sound and a pungent smell filling the living room. 

[goldiesvault]

Tell me you love me

Pairing- James Potter x female reader (Both are in their last year of Hogwarts)

Summary- After a small midnight adventure James Potter finally decided to confess his feelings towards his childhood best friend.

Warning:- lots of fluff, and James Potter being an idiotic sweetheart.

Word Count- 2.5k

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It was Christmas time and you loved Christmas because you got to enjoy it with your mom and your little sister Lara. Living next to the Potters was just an extra benefit. Being childhood best friends? Not so much.

Currently, you were seated in between Sirius and James with Lara cuddled up with Sirius as the four of you decided to watch the stars which looked extremely mesmerizing from the glass ceiling you had in your house.

While the eight-year-old Lara was soundly asleep in Sirius's embrace. You and James talked softly pointing at the stars and giggling.

"Hey look that one looks like a triangle pooping a smaller triangle?" your statement came out more as a question as James giggled at the ridiculousness of the question.

"Look at that one sweet it looks like a heart." James pointed aimlessly in the sky but his gaze was on you and you were totally unaware of it as you squinted your eyes to search where he was pointing it.

Your eyebrows furrowed and you nibbled on your bottom lip as you tried to search for a heart in the sky. James looked at your moonlight face his eyes moved from your beautiful eyes to your lips.

His gaze remained there on your soft lips. James Potter would never admit but he had a huge crush on his childhood best friend y/n y/l/n being childhood best friends meant he had seen everything and so had you.

The two of you constantly joked when found naked shouting "I literally took a bath with you don't be ashamed." But it was all jokes but not for James.

He didnt just have a crush on you. He loves you. He didn't quite register it until you stood on your tippy toes to give him a New Year's kiss when you were in your 4th year of Hogwarts.

Before he could respond you had already walked away from him. The next, when he tried to ask and talk about his heart, broke when he realized that you were extremely drunk and didn't remember anything that night.

A whine left your lips which gained James' attention "I don't see it, Jamie," you pouted as you moved your head to look at him. James smiled at you softly "You were just looking in the wrong direction love." he whispered tugging the strand of your hair behind your ears.

"Well then show me the right direction," you said looking into his beautiful eyes which looked so much like honey. A loud noise from your stomach broke the silence as you hid your face in your hands in embarrassment.

James tried to keep in his laughter in order not to wake Sirius and Lara. He failed and busted out laughing, as you hit him "Stop laughing Potter or else I will not hesitate to crush your pretty head with a quaffel." you said your face still in your hands.

"I think the right direction is to find you some food love," he said kissing your forehead lovingly. Your cheeks burned red from the affection.

He didnt have the balls to tell you that the heart he saw was not somewhere in the sky but it was you. You were his heart.

It was nothing unusual for James to be physically affectionate around you, and you had gotten used to it. He would always have his hands somewhere on you whether it was your hair, your waist, or your shoulders.

He would always hug you before the end of the and give you a kiss on your cheek and forehead whenever he felt happy and giddy.

So being physically affectionate with James Potter was nothing unusual if anything it was like a ritual where without his touch you would feel incomplete.

"Alright! Let's go," James said as he got up and dragged you along with him. You threw him a quizzical look, "Where are you taking me, Mr. Potter?" you questioned him, James only showed you your mom's car keys as he dragged you outside.

"You will see Miss y/l/n." he sent you a wink and opened the car door for you bowing slightly "My lady." you laughed at his dramatics.

You didnt drive much but you had spent the last year with your mother as she taught you and James how to drive. You didn't exactly love the feeling behind the wheels but you enjoyed sitting on the passenger seat and feeling the wind as the car moved fast.

James on the radio and started the car and drove somewhere where he promised himself that he would confess his love to you. You laugh loudly when the dancing queen starts to play.

It is your and Lara's song when you turned seventeen you had blasted this song the whole day. She loved it so much that she demanded you to sing this on her 17. And how could you say no to your pouty sister?

James watched you with a smile his eyes drifting back to the road, his smile grew when you started to sing your heart out.

Your peacefulness came to an end when James pulled over to a small cafe that looked extremely cozy and was still open even though it was 1 in the morning.

You gasped looking at James with excitement, "Is this the place where you had the best hot chocolate ever?!" He nodded chuckling as you squealed in excitement.

You quickly got out of the car not minding that it was freezing and you were in a pair of sweats and James jumper which engulfed you.

"Come on let's go what are you waiting for?" you called for him and sprinted towards the cafe James was hot behind your heels.

As soon as you entered the cafe the smell of coffee and brownies hit you. The same smell which you grew to love over the past many years.

You were in awe as you took in the surroundings of the cozy cafe. James chuckled at your reaction and ordered for both of you while you were too busy staring at the cafe.

"Come on sweets let's find a seat," he said and guided you to the corner sitting opposite you. "This place is so beautiful how did you even find it?" you asked him still in awe.

James shrugged his shoulders as he took his jumper off already feeling warm enough. Your eyes unwillingly went down where you could see his toned abdomen. You quickly look away your cheeks red in colour.

James thanked the waiter and passed you the mug of hot chocolate which had marshmallows and whipped cream on it. Your eyes softened as he had ordered brownies for you.

You always loved brownies with hot chocolate while James loved cookies with his. And seeing him order brownies just for you warmed your heart.

James took a sip from his drink humming at the taste. His eyes watched you as you tried the hot chocolate as well.

As the sweetness of the warm liquid went down your throat you moaned in amazement. James blushed at the sound but his eyes never left your face. "Oh my merlin this is so good!" you exclaimed.

James laughed at your giddy expression. His eyes trailing down on your lips. He chuckled as the whipped cream made a mustache above your lips.

You look at him confused "Wait what's so funny?" you question tiling your head to the side and James almost dies from your cuteness. He shook his head as he leaned forward to wipe it away.

"Nothing you just got a mustash." He said as he leaned forward his eyes locked with you and you felt the whole world stop. Your heartbeat became fast and your cheeks reddened.

Your body felt as if it was set on fire. Your eyes snap to his plump pink lips. Your breath hitched in your throat when his hand touched your chin and his other hand cleaned the whipped cream.

You had such a strong urge to kiss him again but you snap yourself from it when he settled down and went on to drink his drink.

You always loved James so much that he meant the whole world to you. When you tried to make a move and kissed him on New Year's when you were fourteen he gave you a horrified expression that broke your heart.

You didnt want to break the amazing friendship you had so you told him the next day that you didn't remember anything and that you were absolutely drunk.

You slowly started to push the feelings away in the back of your mind and cherished the time you had with him.

You quickly recovered and the two of you sat in silence enjoying the delicious delight.

James thanked the owner of the shop and the two of you walked towards the car. You pull your well-technically James jumper closer to you as the cold London breeze makes your body shiver.

James was lost in his head he so badly wanted to kiss you and tell you how much he loved you but he was too scared that you would reject him.

"James! James!" your voice snapped him from his daze. "hmm?" he questioned. "Open the car," you said. James rubbed the nape of his neck "Uh yeah right sorry." he mumbled fiddling with the car keys.

You sighed and took his trembling hands in yours and warmth immediately spread in both of your bodies. "What's in your mind, James? You can tell me I promise not to tell anyone," you said looking him in the eyes.

James took a sharp breath as he decided that it was now or never. "I-I" he shuttered before relaxing a bit when you squeezed his hands in reassurances.

"I love you," he said, and the world seemed to stop just for a second as his eyes met yours in the starry night sky. "And not in a friend way but more that it. I have always loved you and I will continue to love you even if you try to shave my head." he chuckled at his own words.

"Being a child I didnt know what love was. But when I grew up with you and became a boy and now a man I realized what love was. You showed me what love was and I was grateful you did. I have loved you ever since I can remember." He stopped to take a deep breath in.

"I love the way you laugh, I love your hair and I love your laugh, and god I just love it when you smile. I love when you make me cookies every time we come home and I love when you are so pleasant with your sister. I love when you get along and laugh so hard with our friends and I love when you stand in a corner at the party too afraid and shy to dance." His eyes didn't leave you for one second.

"I love when you support me through thick and thin and I love when you bring me flowers and chocolates every Valentine's Day saying men never receive them. I love it when you take care of animals because you love them so much. And I love it when you hold me so close whenever I cry." tears had started to brim in both of your eyes at this point.

"I love when you were my jersey at my games and how you cry with me at every loss. I love how you take a detention with me just so I don't get bored. I love you when you fall and you cry and every time you think ugly I just sit and think how beautiful you look." The tears had started to stream down your face.

"And I love you just for you so much y/n y/l/n. You make me so happy more than you could imagine," he whispered as he rested his forehead with yours.

Your whole body trembled at the short speech he gave you were speechless and didn't know what to say. "My whole world stopped when you kissed me at New Year when were 14." he finally said.

"It broke my heart that you didnt remember it. It's okay if you don't love me back y/n. It really is okay." his breaths were ragged as he closed his eyes ready for rejection.

To his surprise, a pair of warm lips molded with his perfectly. He smiled into the kiss, kissing you back with the love and passion he had for you.

Parting away for air you looked at him. "I love you too James Potter, for you have given the world to me when you decided to be my friend when we were three. And I have loved ever since I could remember." You whispered your lips brushing against his.

"I thought when I kissed you, you were horrified by me so I lied telling you I didn't remember anything," you said clutching his jumper between your hands.

James chuckled throwing his head back. "Oh Merlin I wasn't horrified love I was just too shocked that the love of my life just kissed me and I couldn't even respond before you moved away from me," he explained as he looked down at you with love and adoration in his eyes.

"I love you so much James Potter," you whispered staring into his eyes with love and admiration. "And I love you y/n y/l/n," he said his eyes moving between your eyes and your lips.

"Can I kiss you?" he questioned and you nodded your head and your heart raced as his lips touched yours electricity ran through your whole body making your legs feel like jelly.

He pushed you against the car as his hands found your waist and yours found his neck. He gently picks you up never breaking the kiss as he sets you up on the car.

Everything about the kiss and his touch was soft, gentle, passionate, and loving. The two of you parted away when you felt the coldness of snow on your warm bodies. The two of you laughed at the cliche of the moment.

James went to kiss your neck and you hummed in delight. "Take me out on dinner first mister." You joked and James chuckled as he looked at you his arms wrapped around your waist.

"Will you do the honors and be my girlfriend y/n y/l/n and make me the happiest man alive?" he asked his gaze on you. You smiled up at him "Yes I will be your girlfriend if you are my boyfriend James Potter."

James chuckled "Yes, Yes a hundred times yes y/l/n." he said and kissed you again a little rough this time.

When you shivered due to snow covering you he took you inside the car and divided back home with a huge smile on his face.

"You know if I was 18 I would have married you right then and there when you gave your speech Mr. Potter." you said trying to hold back your smile when James shouted an excited "WHAT?"

And you did end up marrying the love of your life.

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Authors note:-

This was my first one-shot ever with a x reader it was a bit hard to write but nonetheless so enjoyable!

Let me know your thoughts

Any request is appreciated :)

[starsignchaser]

@jegulus-microfic | June 1st | Pride | word count: 778 happy pride everyone!! no matter who you are, how you identify, who knows or who doesn't, I am so grateful I get to share this pride month with you. lots of love to you all <3

“Potter! Let’s go, Sirius is gonna kick your ass if we’re late!”

Unable to take his eyes away from his reflection, James grips the edge of the bathroom counter tightly.

“My ass? Why is he gonna leave you alone if we’re both late?” His voice comes out with the slightest tremor, no matter how hard he tries. Suddenly, a tuft of black curls appears to his right and he now stands shoulder to shoulder with his boyfriend. His lovely, beautiful, handsome, brave boyfriend. 

“No offense, babe, but you know he would never hurt a hair on my head,” Regulus smirks at him, making eye contact through the mirror. However, barely a second passes before the smirk drops, and a small crinkle forms between his eyebrows.

“What’s going on in there, huh?” The shorter boy turns towards James and pokes at his temple, “Are you feeling okay? We don’t have to go if you’re not up for it.”

But James knows that he doesn’t really mean that. This is their first pride parade as a couple and for all his dark mysterious silences, Regulus has been visibly excited about today for weeks now. From the parade itself to the community center booth they were meant to be volunteering at that afternoon, and especially the drag queen performances at their local dive bar that evening, James had never seen Regulus so openly enthusiastic about spending so much time in public. Yet, here he was feeling like his stomach was about to pop out of his eyeballs. 

“No, no. Of course, I’m up for it. We’re going to have a great time!” He’s trying his best to sound confident but he knows it’s not cutting it. Regulus grabs his hand and lays his other hand on his cheek, pulling his face down until their foreheads almost touch.

“Jamie, talk to me.” his boyfriend asks, rubbing his thumb along his cheekbone, just below the glitter James had rubbed on only a few minutes before. “You can tell me anything, whatever it is we can figure it out.”

“I don’t,” James squeezed his eyes shut, frustrated that he couldn’t find the words. “I’ve just… I’ve never gone to Pride before. I don’t feel like I belong, or - no, it’s not that, but what if I do something wrong? Or what if people can tell that I don’t fit in? You and Sirius and Remus have all gone to Pride before, you are so much more integrated into the community, you have so many connections, and I only just figured myself out this year! How am I- What am I-?”

“Breathe, baby. Take a deep breath with me, yeah?” Regulus brought James’ hand to his chest and took a deep breath, hoping it would force the taller boy to focus on his breathing. After a few seconds, James was able to breathe normally on his own.

“I’m sorry, I should’ve said something earlier, I just didn’t know how.” James winced and tried to step away but Regulus wouldn’t let him.

“Listen to me, love. You belong at Pride. You are meant to be there. You are just as much a part of this community as anyone else. You belong there for so many reasons but most importantly because you are a beautiful, wonderful, queer man. If anyone tries to tell you otherwise, then they are the problem, they are the ones who don’t belong.” Regulus stepped closer, moving to wrap his arms around James’ waist.

“ And, baby,” he smiled, “my Pride would be incomplete without you. And if that means we spend Pride sitting on our couch watching shitty queer movies and making out, then that is what our Pride will be. And I will still be the happiest man on earth to celebrate it with you. But don’t hold yourself back from going to Pride because you think you “don’t belong” because I will tell Sirius and he’ll double kick your ass.” 

Even with tears prickling in his eyes, that finally got a bit of a giggle out of James. The weight that had been settling on his chest all morning was suddenly gone. He grabbed at his partner’s waist, squeezing at his hips, before dropping a kiss to the tip of Regulus’ nose. He could do this. He could do anything with this man by his side. 

“Thank you, my love. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“You’d be just fine, darling. But I’m so happy that I’m lucky enough to be with you.” Regulus smiled, his eyes crinkling with his joy. 

“I love you, Reg.”

“I love you too, James. Now come on, we really have to go!”

[esorxy]

remembering all the insanely long marauders fics ive brainrotted over because i kinda forgot all of them. roughly in the order i read them.

Whatever happened to the young, young lovers?

355k, jegulus wolfstar rosekiller. post war (ended by regulus) where they just hang around grimmauld place all day. i literally cant remember anything that happened. but i liked how they stayed home and didnt go outside, because i relate to that. it was alternating chapters between post war and pre war, honestly i dont even know it was just so much relationship angst and regulus being incredibly competent and hurt.

All The Young Dudes

526k, the character development and buildup, its like the level of the actual series without the annual voldemort attack. i was DESTROYED by the ending, it lived in my brain rent free for like a week. why did it have to be canon compliant???! the way they spent so much time pining, so much time apart, and so little time together. but that theyre literal soulmates, which is so sad for grant (he suffered true emotional damage) lmfao. I guess this is the basis (canon??) of marauders era

we can be heroes, for ever and ever

102k alternate happy ending to atyd - yes PLEASE this is what i needed to heal the pain after reading atyd.

choices

624k. lowkey feel the same way towards this as atyd, except it didnt live in my brain rent free for a week. in that i respect that it's good and got heartbroken when everyone died and they didn't get their happy ending, but it did get me into jegulus so I'm not complaining. IDK it's just sad, but i love regulus and evan and cerci. even though i deadass can't remember anything else.

crimson rivers

865k actually SOBBING this fic is everything. so much plot and so much hurt, it is amazing and painful and intense. it has the most picturesque scenes, beautiful happy ending. but i did kinda get sick of it near the end cos its so fuckin long, and i was not into the girls in the fic so i was kinda cbs

holding onto the self

76k and it was so good i felt so sad for sirius. this is the type of fic which makes me jaw drop and suck in breath like poor baby honestly. no summary needed cos ill never forget what its about lmfao....

just lovers

321k fake dating au. this is GREAT. its so light hearted which is a great change from the akckdjebakzj. this is the climb to the top for regulus being my favourite character. lowkey can't remember shit but i liked it and i need more fics like it because it was creative and there's not much room for that in marauders verse

only the brave

645k and The fic of my dreams. this is everything and i loved every second of it. every character is so great, and it got me into pandalily!!! perfect amount of hurt (a lot), and such good plot. it has every ship i like, i was like drowning in a hot spring of happiness while reading this

ecliptic

147k, oh it's so creative and new. it was so suspenseful cos we got 0 answers, and the fic is deadass incomplete wtf!! i love how everyone is sad but mostly rational. the jegulus was really really nice, and i liked how the cruciatus was made out to be a big deal so the hurt/comfort is better. i feel like the plot is better than the delivery

wolfstar my one true pair, jegulus my second true pair, evan®ulus has a special place in my heart, marauders fanfiction a permanent space in my mind for at least the next few weeks

new edit: shit! i forgot to update and i read so many more long fics and can barely remember them now

mastermind

311k i cant even remember anything that happened ... except i liked the dynamic between narcissa and regulus, and narcissa is so damn pretty. this was the one where regulus made james and sirius go with him to the cave, and then james had to force him to drink the potion, so much angst arghhhh.

all along there was some invisible string (tying you to me)

103k spiderman AU + high school and all i can say that its an original setting... the pining was great, and the spiderman kiss!! but other than that like it was good, i guess

I adored you madly, extravagantly, absurdly

243k Victorian AU with arranged marriage trans regulus. I loved regulus' character, he was so spiteful and petty but also down bad, and jegulus matched so perfectly together. i want his life so bad because his literal job was being married, like deadass he didnt do shit all day except read, play with his cats and pine for his husband...

a violent kind of spin

212k not going to lie, my favourite/most striking parts of this fic were the $h scenes... and i just finished it last night so I dont even have an excuse. james asking sirius to turn around and not even waiting for him to do it??? oml hes unhinged and it was so well written. the bathtub scene when he was on a timer and then just walked out like everything was fine!!! help it was so angsty im in love. i feel like i speedran this fic and didnt read it properly, which is probably accurate

Im not gonna teach him how to dance with you

122k. rosekiller is the BEST. i love the whole plot tbh and it was so well paced. love that for evan because nobody else is gonna keep by with barty's crazy. i would have liked it more if it had crack undertones but yknow whatever, cant have everything. i thoroughly enjoyed all the romantic tension in the leadup, the way they were both so in love im gone.

All the young dudes - Sirius' Perspective

628k, let me tell you, canon has no right being that sad, and the beloved author just fed off that like a parasite. i should have expected how this fanfic would destroy me, but the delivery made it so much more painful. i sobbed reading the Halloween and Azkaban chapters. and sirius,,, like why did you have to be so angry all the time. and so obsessed with remus from day 1. it was great. although like halfway through i just felt like ... wolfstar is so basic. jegulus once jegulus forever i guess.

whatever our souls are made of

157k hanahaki where we really gotta work for the happy ending. OML it was so beautifully sad. reggie 💔💔. sirius said nobody on the earth deserves his baby brother, but if he had to pick someone, it would be James 😭😭 I'm a broken man

oml i havent updated in 2 months... its ok i didnt read that much cos i was too tired with uni and work. anyway i found all my fics through tiktok, tumblr, or thru the author cos this gold mine is too big sorry chief. which is like. someone recommended this following fic :skull:

I'm not okay (I solemnly swear)

107k and unfinished :000 cant believe it i read something unfinished but when i read the tags i was like ok yeah im in. my secret is that i read fics like these!!! and most of them are not well written but this one is. and so was that other one about sirius but it was only like 78k so i didnt write it up. anyway poor reggie is going through it, and idk if its ever getting finished cos the poor author might be going through it too. additional note: idk if this is the one but bestie has so many problems like get help fr.

the veil of secrecy

100k but its unfinished and let me tell nobody i was devastated. omg it was so sad so the summary is after reggie defected voldymouldy found out and like --- got all his remaining horcruxes and stuffed them inside his chest and abdominal cavity in some crazy ass surgery. and then he sewed his mouth shut and broke his fingers and kept him around him like some porcelain doll/pet and thats the punishment????? oml how do u think of that... anyway so he dissociates into his fabric walls of occlumency so voldy doesnt know where the locket is. ok whatever they escape and he falls in love with jamie idk. its unfinished.

to the boy who...

238k its similar to the previous one (written by the same author ibbsterkisster) and i found it to read to cope with the first one not being finished. yes this is like 3x as long sighs we all know how it is. anyway its similar except reggie is like his boy toy instead... which is even worse. anyway i cant remember anything about the jegulus but i DO remember that evan was so sweet (as he is) he like stroked the bruise on reggies wrist very gently :facepalm: and that scene lives rent free in my brain.

blood on my shirt, heart in my hand

22k and id just like to say, this is the kind of horror that i like. its kinda a mystery at first but its not so creepy, and the jegulus endgame is stronger than a bulletproof vest. so james is having dreams which are vaguely murderous, and when he wakes up the events like kinda match up. turns out hes like having some repetitive dissociative episode every night at 12.37am and getting up to murder people. and after the first time reggie was just like 'well if ur in then im in too' and straight up helps him murder people ?!? i loved it. murder husbands.

the long game

250k and this is the most unique fic youll get here. modern high school au where reggie is like this god genius talented painter and they work on a musical set together, and reggie gets an art show and idk why this stood out to me but he drew like a green soft and a purple cushion and was like... this represents me and evan, cos were ok separately but great together. i read this so long ago i cant even remember what i thought of it

jealousy, jealousy

85k + unfinished again!! anyway so bartylus fake date so james and evan can get jealous and then they both end up together. i just remember it was so cute because they would just hug each other like constantly all the time, and cry at the smallest inconvenience, then their friend/boyfriend would go and lie with them in bed and hug them and that was like a very significant portion of it. and im not even complaining this is the type of physical affection they deserve

pathological people pleaser

114k but it passed so fast?!?! james is so fuckin unstable man like get a therapist. ok i actually enjoyed this so much because for some reason i was really into horror (it was literally 2 days ago) and this wasnt horror but they did not reveal like why james was so fucked, and which parts of his narration were unreliable until quite a bit in. also there was more than a month gap between me bookmarking this one and the last one and like i dont even know what i did with myself??? (actually i lied i read more fanfiction i just forgot i did cos i forgot to bookmark it) (summary: summer holiday where starchaser fall in love also effie died in a car crash on the way to james after he called and was like mom im gonna kms. ok but it was really well written and full of suspense)

anti-hero

237k and i just finished it so its fresh in my mind (for once) ok now that i think about it i have no idea why regulus lived that first time... maybe i didnt read closely enough but like when fics are that long i kinda just miss some stuff or forget it and they all blur together anyway. ok so firstly i want a story of james and regulus in this universe when they were still at hogwarts because like having a secret relationship for 2 years and also doing drugs.. just the hurt comfort ahhh maybe without all the hurt and yelling but whatever. cant have it all. anyway this was so well written i always like narcissa tbh. glad james and regulus sorted out their shit eventually even though it took so. fucking. long. anyway yikes (summary: reggie lives after the cave and they go horcrux hunting and kill voldy but then reggie fucks off to america and becomes a drug addict again but comes back, and james has anger issues but only when it comes to regulus anyway they kept hurting each other that i didnt even feel sad anymore when it happened) addition: oml reggie being an addict + nic in beautiful boy the stars aligned finally i get some visual scenes in this fandom

doing a word count sum of the above and its: 6 million and 476 thousand...

meetings that start in the dark

656k and oml i was SEMI HOOKED. honestly like why did it take them so fucking long to get back together like the moment Voldemort dropped dead James should have been unable to stay away from regulus. anyway love how they're obsessed with each other, love how Luna and Harry are playing matchmaker. and i especially love how Sirius was the lame embarrassing parent ahah. also the amount of bs evan has to put up with from reg and barty... jesus christ i loved them in this except for how he was buff girl no evan is a twink and this fic wont change my mind

sometimes, running away does solve all your problems

15k so reggie literally walks out of his house and his parents dont even notice and he runs away and meets james and they live together it was perfect omfg i loved it so so so much. it had the same sad, resigned tone as the dsmp fics that i was obsessed with before and would reread over and over. and the small village quiet life is a dream

27 club

27k and why was it so heavy oml like i didn't sign up for this sadness. ok so reggie is DEAD but before that he and James were like lovers and drug buddies but also lacked healthy communication. james is like bye imma get clean without u, the literal love of my life. the whole thing was so sad because it would be like one bit of 'oh and they were in love and making music' and then another bit of 'james was mourning so hard he couldnt get out of bed'. it was lowkey magical to read except for how hes dead.

you missed my heart

100k and omfg im in shock tbh. like what the actual fuck. I'm in shock in an "im unsettled and creeped out" way. i don't even know why because ive read serial killer jegulus fics before and it was all peachy, but maybe this one was so creepy because we were in the dark, and the killing isn't unrealistic and romanticised. James was so smitten with regulus too I'm crying i was actually convinced that reggie wasn't the killer. i need soft regulus fluff to cope with this. to erase the image of reggie being a psychopath. omg Sirius after finding out the truth.. poor boy was like catatonic. I'm never reading unhappy ending fics again I've become weak my heart can't take it

I'm going to start including the shorter fanfics that i read and are memorable as well because i don't discriminate

which means i have a lot of catching up to do

the moment and the sound

29k so james runs away with harry to escape voldemort and meets reggie by chance. they live together and james is like straight up depressed. i liked this fic but also forgot what it was like.

raise hell

30k it's basically about them being angels and demons and working together to idk stop the world from ending. i liked the tone of the fic in that everyone was like set in their ways and was like wtf at everyone else but also i wish it was longer and there was more about each person's like representation like Sirius being the angel of justice. also it was so funny regulus the angel of diligence and James the demon of lust.

blackpool

63k and omg it was so well written but i was so confused the whole time cos i have no literary ability. like regulus being a straight up unreliable narrator?!?! deadass in shock half the time reading this tbh

calm before the storm

51k and i could draw a graph of the shock factor of this fic and it would look like a staircase with 3 steps. at the start it was so happy and cute and i was like omg why did i click on this again and then sirius dies and james loses his memory and reggie is like fucked up that's the first step up and then they heal whatever but then reggie straight up starts murdering people and making a show out of it i read it all like 😳😳. unhinged fr, and also everyone tried to kts at least once like besties go see a therapist please

pink lemonade

121k band tour au where they sing (i think mostly) arctic monkeys songs and kudos because the lyrics all fit so well to whatever clown ass miscommunication situation jegulus have going on. it was relationship angst and maybe i would have enjoyed it more if i read it earlier but rn i need action and thrill. i was like to my irl friend like miscommunication angst isn't enough for me anymore i need murder and she was like girl wtf.

youngblood

75k basically jegulus were roommates in juvenile detection and they had such a deep soul connection in the 2 months and then never reconnected until like 9 years later. ok anyway my favourite part was James and how he was so unhinged. like literally provoking bullies so they hurt him is his form of sh... girl get a grip honestly but also respect for the idgaf factor

mercy

36k so james gets possessed by a ??demon called mercy and reg is an exorcist... so its very obvious what drew me into this. anyway james lives at regs house while hes figuring out what the fuck is wrong with him and they just ??? fall in love. ok slow burn was not really burning at all more like a ticking bomb but the horror was cute. also i found it at night and then read it all at like 8-9am in the morning before getting out of bed so i cant remember it but it was well written and the demon was lowkey cute too he was just out for drama which i can relate

[ellecdc]

🧺 CONGRATS ON 2K HOLY BALLS

for the sfw alphabet, H, W, X, & Z for reg and mmmmaybeee remus??

thanks babes!!

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Regulus I want to say no (not at first), I sort of see him as awkward and touch averse - I don't think he's ever known a loving touch really before [besides perhaps a hug from Sirius]. and then as he grows more comfortable and confident in his relationship, he grows accustomed to them but not necessarily in public and I also think you might have to encourage him/ask him for one (which he gives very quickly and willingly - ends up being a really good hugger)

Remus I headcanon as super touchy so he'd be more willing to hug. doesn't do it often in public necessarily but does take advantage when the opportunity is there

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I don't love the notion that a person's whole existence and purpose is to find 'their other half' in life so....personally I want to say no but...

Regulus I think would be at a loss if he lost his partner/felt like he was losing them after he got them; like I said he didn't necessarily know unconditional love before and hasn't ever felt this connected to a person before so I think he'd very much be at odd ends

I think Remus is a little more confident in himself but I think he'd be surprised because he never imagined someone would be able to love him (due to his lycanthropy) so the idea of losing that would be pretty scary.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Regulus' love language (how he shows love) is gift giving and acts of service. How he likes to be loved is words of affirmation.

Remus' love language (how he shows love) is physical touch and acts of service. How he likes to be loved is words of affirmation and quality time.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Regulus never sleeps (or sleeps well), the kind of bloke who will be up until 3am focused on some random hyper fixation

Remus loves sleep - it's one of his favourite pastimes. always down for a cwtch and loves going to bed early and sleeping in late.

[solitaire-sol]

21: Deprive

For: @prongsfoot-microfic Month: March 2023 AO3: Link Notes: A continuation of the arc last seen in 13. Pupil, in which we timeskip to James' fourth year at Hogwarts and his eighth and last year of being without Sirius Black not that James knows it yet. There's also a tiny hint of Jily, but only in passing.

How long can you last without your soulmate?

Trick question: Go without them long enough, and you won't be soulmates anymore. When the connection is new, it needs to be strengthened in the same way a fire needs to be fed: Without proximity, without the resonance of the magical cores, soulbonds die on the vine.

At fourteen, James had last seen his soulmate on the day they'd found each other. There was little that a child could do, and the Potters didn't circulate through the same social strata as the Blacks; Sirius had disappeared into his family's estate, and James' hopes had been dashed once he'd started Hogwarts and no Sirius Black was called for Sorting. His mother owled not long after with the disappointing news that Walburga, bucking generations of Slytherin legacy, had sent her eldest son to a different school, undoubtedly for the sole purpose of keeping him away from his soulmate. A drastic conclusion, some would say, but James could think of no other reason, and he'd mentally cursed the Black matriarch with the worst words he could summon – which weren't much, given his age – and crumpled up his mother's letter before a pang of guilt made him hastily smooth it out again. It wasn't his Mum's fault that Sirius' mum was being unreasonable.

By then, six years into an incomplete soulbond, James was getting a little desperate. He could feel their connection, but it became less present with each passing year: In the beginning, James had dreamed of Sirius, waking with phantom music in his head, and he'd wondered if Sirius had dreamed of him. Those dreams had come less often until at fourteen it felt as though their tenuous link was a candle's-flame, liable to be extinguished at any moment.

It wasn't as if James' life was lacking: He had his parents, the youngest captaincy in House history and Remus and Peter cheering him from the stands. He had a flirtation with Lily Evans, though when they were paired for dance lessons, James couldn't help his disappointment when he took her hand and felt nothing more than the softness of her palm. And there was, of course, the excitement of the Triwizard Tournament, for which James was already planning to put forth his name.

Sometimes James thought about Sirius Black, wondered what it would have been like if they'd gone through Hogwarts together. Would Sirius have fought Slytherins in the halls with him, when Peter was too afraid and Remus too afraid of being caught? Would Sirius have roamed the corridors with James after curfew rather than talk him into staying, as Remus did? Would he have laughed at the way James approached Lily, covering his nerves by tousling his hair, or would he have taken James' hand before Lily did, regardless of what McGonagall would say? James couldn't be sure, and maybe there wasn't any point in wondering, but part of him felt cheated by the way he'd never had the chance to know.

[findthatgwfic]

Hello! I used to binge Gundam Wing/Harry Potter fics, but a lot of them seem to have disappeared. There are three in particular I really want to read again-

two of them involved Harry and Luna in the world of Gundam Wing, both were incomplete.

In one Harry finds out Trowa was his brother sent to another world by Dumbledore. He (and Luna, who is his sister???) jump to that world. The jump had side effects and they’re now little kids, and since it’s a non magical world anything magical was reduced to composite parts or made useless. They wander into a library, who calls the preventers, and they’re picked up by the boys.

in the other Harry botches things with the time turner so bad his existence is permanently erased from his timeline and he’s bounced to the nearest parallel world, Gundam Wing world. He basically wakes up with two sets of memories and struggles with how different and the same he and the Dursleys are… until he realizes this world’s version of Sirius is a political prisoner and he convinces one of the boys who is undercover at the school to let him help break him out. (Luna is there to because reasons but she’s there on purpose and figures out they can still sorta do magic it’s just harder) they go, break him out, and make it back to their families without outing themselves.

last one was actually a full length completed fic - botched time turner spell thing, Harry is sent somewhere he doesn’t recognize right in front of Heero right at the beginning. Heero threatens him into a sworn vow to do what he’s told and is basically a prisoner joining the group until Heero feels bad. Plot twist is Harry finds out he is actually in the future, the wizarding world is wiped out, and the only thing left of it is ruins and muggleborn descendants hiding their random abilities in the regular population. Harry finds out he’s basically the magical King Arthur and inherits everything left of the magical world and becomes king of a new all magical kingdom. Towards the end of the fic there’s a magical coronation in a lake where the embodiment of magic crowns him.

…you’d think these fic would be easier to find…

I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with these stories. Hopefully someone else will recognize them.

[tragically-but-finnally-yours]

Mini-Fic: The Cost of Freedom

Words: 2321 | incomplete but unlikely to be continued

Notes: i really did try to write angsty black brothers but i hate everytime about this fic that it literally made me cry. however, i am sharing with you all in hopes that someone out there might like it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sirius Black had always known he was different from the rest of his family. He had never shared their pure-blood beliefs or their penchant for cruelty. And yet, he had always tried to keep the peace, to keep his head down, to avoid their wrath. If not for his sake, then at least for his brother. But as he stood in the foyer of his family's ancestral home, his bags packed and ready to go, he knew that he was making the right decision. Even if that decision was going to bring an end to the only familial relationship he cared about.

Said family member was sitting on the stairs, staring down at him. Sirius had refused to turn on any of the lights in the house. Instead opting to stumble through the dark in hopes of not waking anyone up. He really shouldn’t have been surprised that Regulus had woken up regardless. That’s just how they were. Growing up in the environment they did meant that they had some kind of sixth sense when the other was in mortal peril.

Sirius left his bag by the door, walking towards the stairs but not going up them. From here he could make out Regulus’ face a little better. His brother’s face was blank but the slight puffiness of his eyes suggested he was more effected than he was willing to let on.

“You’re leaving.”

Regulus’ voice wasn’t very loud but with the ocean of space between them, it felt like he was shouting.

“You know I have to. It’s not safe for me here,” Sirius pauses, watching as Regulus wraps his arms around his knees. “It’s not safe for you here either.”

“It’s not safe for someone like me anywhere,” Regulus mumbles. Before Sirius can question what he means, Regulus stands, putting one hand on the banister, walking slowly down the stairs. Sirius winces when he realised why Regulus was taking it slow. Their parents had been mad about something- what it was, Sirius wasn’t sure- but they had taken it out on both of them at dinner. Sirius had tried to mouth off to their parents, in an attempt to focus their anger on him rather than his brother. But in similar fashion, Regulus had used his own tactics to enrage their parents.

It hadn’t ended well for either of them. Sirius had ended up with a black eye and at least 3 new scars on his back. Regulus- from what he had allowed Sirius to see at least- had a dark bruise forming on his ribs that made it difficult for him to breathe and walk. It had also meant that they’d gone without dinner, but going without a meal was something that had happened so frequently to them that it wasn’t quite effective as their parents other punishments.

Regulus reaches the bottom of the stairs and stands in front of Sirius, looking up at him with a mix of sadness and anger in his eyes. "You're abandoning me," he accused, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Come with me,” Sirius offers.

“I don’t need your pity offer,” Regulus spits.

“It’s not- It’s not a pity offer Reggie. I want you to come with me, of course I do. But I knew you would never come.”

“How could you even know that if you don’t even offer?”

Sirius already knows the answer but he still asks anyway, “Will you leave with me? Leave this god awful place behind and go somewhere safe- somewhere where we are loved, like we’re supposed to be.”

Regulus shakes his head, backing way so he’s against the wall. He slides down it with a soft thud, his fingers a tangled mess on his lap. “I can’t come with you.”

“Then why would you make me ask?”

Regulus looks up sharply, “I can’t come with you, because I have to stay here. I have to stay, be the heir, be the pure-blood son they want so you can be free.”

That draws Sirius up short, “What?”

Regulus lets out a laugh that’s slightly maniacal and more than a little wet, “Don’t you get it? If we both go, they’ll come after us. What’s worse than losing one heir? Losing both of them. Their image would be destroyed, and we both know that they care more about that than they do us.” Regulus takes a sharp breathe, his shoulders shaking a little. “But- but if I stay, they won’t go after you. They won’t have a need. They’ll still have their pure-blood heir, and you’ll have the chance at the life you deserve.”

It takes Sirius a moment to realise that Regulus is more resigned than upset. As though he’s thought about it, and already accepted his future.

“You knew I was going to leave.”

Regulus nods, staring down at his feet. “You mumble in your sleep, kept saying that you had to get out. It wasn’t until I found the bag in your closet that I put it all together.”

Sirius isn’t sure if sure if he should be proud or upset with Regulus until he realises what he just confessed, “Why were you in my closet in the first place?”

“I- I was looking for a shirt of yours. I figured that if I can’t make you stay, I could at least have something to remember you by.” Sirius watches as Regulus tugs his Slytherin jumper over his head, revealing the shirt that is clearly not his. It’s a little large and has the picture of a motorbike on the front, something Sirius is sure that Regulus has never even seen before.

“I didn’t even realise that it had gone missing.” Sirius is lying of course. He had gone looking for the shirt a few days ago and had been rather upset when he couldn’t find it. Remus had gifted it to him when he learnt that Sirius was interested in motorbikes. It had quickly become one of the many shirts that cycled between his friends, but Sirius knew it would be better cared for in Regulus’ hands.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t. I don’t think I could give it back, even now that you know I stole it.” Regulus looks up at his brother, gesturing for him to sit down, which Sirius does so immediately. “I have to ask, and I do apologise for it. Is there anything I can do to make you stay?”

Sirius shakes his head, “No. I can’t. It’ll kill me- They’ll kill me.”

“But it’s okay for me to stay here, alone?”

Sirius throws his hands up, frustrated. “I don’t get it Regulus, I thought you understood. You said you knew I was leaving, why are you making it so hard for me to go?”

“Because I want you to stay!” Regulus bursts out, “I want you to stay here with me, to be stuck in this cycle of pain. Because you make it slightly more manageable. But I can’t say that, because it’s selfish and wrong and I know you have to leave. I get it. But accepting something doesn’t make it hurt any less.” Sirius heart aches as he watches Regulus scrub at his eyes. “I want to be enough for you to stay and deal with the pain anyway.”

Sirius feels his heart break a little for his brother. He's always known that Regulus had a soft spot for him, but he didn't know how deep it ran. Regulus was willing to risk his own safety, his own future, just to make sure that Sirius could have a chance at a life outside of their family's abuse.

"Reggie," Sirius starts, but stops when he realises there’s nothing more to say. Not with words anyway. It seemed that they had both made up their minds, accepted their decisions and the results of them, yet still couldn’t say goodbye. “Please, please come with me.”

“You know I can’t. We can’t both leave and be happy.”

“But we can’t both stay here together and be miserable.” Sirius responds softly. They were at an impasse, they both knew it. Both desperate to help the other without shattering their own heart in the process.

“There isn’t a way for us to stay together and be happy, is there?” Regulus already knows the answer by the way Sirius’ eyes tear up.

Sirius wraps his arms tightly around his brother, “I’m afraid not.”

Regulus sinks his teeth into his bottom lip, refusing to allow the sob desperately crawling up his throat to escape. “I love you,” he whispers into Sirius’ shoulder.

He feels Sirius’ chest heave and concave a little. His own chest hurts but he refuses to give into it. Not now, not when Sirius is so close to leaving. He knows, deep down, that if he were start crying, Sirius would do everything in his power to make it better. Even staying. “You’ll always be my brother.” He isn’t sure if Sirius says the words out loud or his lips just mouth the words into his skin, but either way, Regulus feels them settle into his bones like a burn. He knows that the words with be carved into him until the day he dies, perhaps even longer.

They don’t say anything, simply sitting in silence, knowing it’s the last chance they’ll get to do it. Sirius never once removes himself from Regulus and Regulus takes the chance to bask in his brothers warmth for as long as he’s allowed. He knows that it’ll be a long time before he feels warm- truly feels warm again. The bruise in his side is becoming unbearable but he’d rather stop breathing than let go of Sirius.

Sirius’ hand brushes against his side and with the way they’ve been sitting, the pain is a lot strong than Regulus would ever admit. Regulus involuntarily jerks, pulling away just enough for the brothers to be separated for a brief moment. Sirius gasps, and from the way he immediately pulls away, Regulus knows he’d completely forgotten about the bruising on his side. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Sirius says the words so gently, like he’s scared that his voice could do more damage.

“I’d harm myself a thousand times just for you to be okay.” Evidently it’s the wrong thing to say because Sirius’ expression crumbles and a fresh round of tears flow down his face.

“I hate myself for not being able to say the same.” Sirius shakes with his words, but Regulus just smiles.

“I know. You have a whole world out there and mine whole world is sitting right beside me.” Regulus runs a hand through Sirius’ hair. “Can- can I ask? What is your plan? Where are you going to go when you leave here? You can’t just stay out on the streets, they’ll find you in an instant.”

Sirius pulls away, but doesn’t bother wiping his tears. Neither of them mentioned them, nor the dark patch they left on Regulus’ shirt. “Andromeda‘s place. I know she’ll take me in a heart beat.”

Regulus shakes his head, “That won’t work.”

“You don’t think she’ll take me in?”

“No. But it’s the first place that they’ll look for you. When a Black runs away, or gets disowned, their response always seems to be to go to another Black who has done the same. It’s quite literally what Andromeda did as well. She ran to Uncle Alphard’s place and that’s how they found her the first time. You need to go somewhere they won’t think.”

“What about that Lupin boy you hang out with? He’s a halfblood, is he not? Sure, their heir running away would ruin their image, but why would they taint it further by allowing themself to associate with people they view as lesser?”

Sirius shakes his head, “I don’t want to put Remus through that. Or his family, for that matter.” He glared briefly at the full moon he can see peaking out from behind the partially shut window in his view. “They’ve already got enough to deal with, without adding the horrors of our family into the mix.”

Regulus nods, accepting the answer for what it was.

“What about another Pureblood family?” Sirius says after a long moment.

Regulus scoffs, “I’ll be surprised if you can find another Pureblood family that’ll want to go against the Blacks.”

“What if it’s a blood-traitor family?”

Regulus’ face goes a little slack, “You’re talking about the Potter’s aren’t you?”

Sirius winces, trying to approach the subject delicately without entirely dismissing the plan slowly forming in his mind. He knows that Regulus has a hatred for the Potters and while it’s unjust, Sirius knows where it stems from. Regulus- despite Sirius’ many reassurances- has always viewed the Potters as Sirius’ “replacement” family. The idea was fuelled by jealousy and a painful dream of being loved by a family. He refuses to feed Regulus’ delusions but he knows that he doesn’t have another choice.

“They’ve always told me that I can go to them if I ever need to.” Regulus looks pained, but his silence causes Sirius to ramble on. “Effie and Monty wouldn’t mind if you came too. In fact, they’d probably try to come get you if you didn’t. They’re just that kind.”

“Do you really think that they’d take you- that they’d take us in?”

“In a heartbeat.”

Regulus sighs, “I think that they’ll be your best option. At least until you’re back at Hogwarts for the new year.”

Sirius can’t help but notice the way that Regulus says “you” rather than “us”. The silence envelopes them for so long that he thinks Regulus has fallen asleep at his side.

Sirius sits there, pain and anger stirring slowly in his stomach. This wasn’t fair, life wasn’t fair. Here was his freedom and happiness, dangling right in front of him and the only thing in the way was his brothers own happiness.

[roalinda]

Stardust! :)

I have already answered an ask like this ♡ but I love this wip so I will answer no matter how many times I am asked ♡ stardust is a wip in which Sirius' memory has to be oblivated to protect James. He forgets James so their love will end up one-sided. James comes with star tears disease which is a type of Hanahaki.

Both diseases are terminal and painful. In Hanahaki patient throws up flowers but in star tears disease the patient cries crystallized stars. He/she ends up with losing the ability to see color and then complete blindness. Memory loss and death are the last stages.

I would have posted a snippet from my laptop but I'm on my mobile with no access to my laptop, so here is a small snippet I posted on prongsfoot server before. ♡

****

Nothing made sense as James half-stumbled, half-crawled into the living room, blindly looking for his mirror on the table. He could feel the weight of his father's sympathetic gaze on his back as he started to look around frantically, breathless and beside himself with worry. His hazel eyes were confused behind his glasses, still not fully comprehending what was happening. His heart was beating wildly in his chest, pounding so hard that he could feel it drumming in his ears. He had never felt like this. He had never felt this desperate. Not when the Gryffindor team lost the quidditch cup, not when he was rejected by Lily before he realized his feelings for Sirius, not even when he received the news of his father's poor health. 

He found the mirror at last and held onto it tightly, like a lifeline. He gulped nervously before calling out his lover's name with tears in his voice. 

"Sirius Black." No answer. 

"Sirius Black." No answer.

"Sirius fucking Black!" No answer.

"Padfoot?" No answer. 

"Sirius…Si…please…Si…" James nearly begged this time, his lower lip wobbling like a child who had been left behind by his mother. It was to be expected, Sirius was the yin to his yang. James was incomplete without him.

[diana-bookfairchild]

are there any themes, motifs, phrases, symbols, narrative devices or anything else that come up multiple times in different stories you've written? what are they, and why do you think they recur in your work?

Ooh, interesting question!

Honestly, I don't think I've written enough to actually determine if something is a trend in my stories but I do think I focus on somethings more than others.

For instance, I tend to prefer platonic relationships over romantic. I suppose it's because I have zero interest in romantic relationships myself - and therefore even if I like Hinny, or Percabeth or Arwen and Freylin or Spideychelle I prioritize Golden Trio, Seven friendship, Merlin and Arthur friendship and Peter and Ned friendship when I write or read.

Another thing that recurs is grief and other emotions and how they affect people physically. My fics tend to be oneshots and focus a lot on characters and their introspections and relationships rather than plot - and the only even vaguely plotty stuff I have is all incomplete, so. . .

Emotions are visceral, and I like exploring that. How they twist people's stomachs, drop their hearts, make their hands tremble. It may be a tad morbid but I really like writing stuff like that - for Sirius his panic about his best friends feels like a fire, because I thought it would suit him. He deals with his concerns otherwise in a kind of over-it monologue and drinking. For Lee, charming, cocky Lee, years after the loss, I wrote it as a meditative pause, an old sadness that flares up occasionally as an irritation. For Arthur in my Merlin WIP, grief is uncertainty and dread and numbness. For Beth in my Queen's Gambit oneshot, she visualizes her emotions as ice crystallizing her insides.

If this person gets happy news do they scream in joy, clutch their chest or gasp silently and daintily with a hand to their mouth? When they grieve do they rage or weep or collapse or throw things? Is how they perceive love calm and peace, or a burning fire and passion?

Most of my fics tend to be long thought processes, typically about their relationships and emotions. It's why I don't mind writing either canon compliant or canon divergent, because writing emotions and relationships in any scenario is fascinating. I suppose it's because I like to organize emotions properly and having my characters do that makes it cathartic. I love, love LOVE platonic relationships, so characters monologue (in their thoughts, at least) about it all the time - see Ron in Blood of the Covenant about Harry and Hermione and Ginny, Arthur about Merlin in ... pretty much all the fics I've written about them, Sirius about Jily and Harry, Golden Trio about one another in Legends Never Die, Ginny about Harry and her family in no one else's eyes that could see into me, Percy about everyone in Limit of Pain, Peter about Ned, May, Tony and Shuri in those who have never sought it.

Then there's the fact that I like outsider povs. Harry is my favourite character in Harry Potter - and my fics about him are from Ginny, Hermione and Ron's PoVs, so that I can wax lyrical about how awesome I think he is without him sounding ridiculously OOC.

Doubt this was what you were looking for, but I can't really think of anything else off the top of my head. If you have anything specific that you want a reason for, feel free!

[hircyon]

1,4,11,23,25,38,43 :>

1. Your first OC ever?

Strictly speaking, a blue and purple (and I mean CRAYOLA blue and purple) German Shepherd furry named Karma, that I made when I was 10 or something.

I really don't remember my first fandom OC. I'm not sure when I got "into" fandom. My most complete memory was Harry Potter, but that wasn't the first time I’d been obsessed with a media. Maybe the first time I was seeing and creating content within the context of fandom (as opposed to me @ 11 spamming a Redwall RP board with character submissions because I didn’t know what RP was, I just liked to make little guys).

I sure did make the Mary Sue-est of Sues to ship with Sirius. I don't remember her name at all but I do remember that she was genuine royalty but didn't know it until late in her "story," so she had like 6 names, because that's what I thought being regal was like. I think one of her middle names was "Tundra Aurora" I'm not shitting you. She was also an incomplete shapeshifter due to a tragic accident in her youth where she was struck with an errant spell (the one that uhhhh turns you into an animal. I'm NOT doing HP research in this day and age) and that somehow meant she could turn into any creature at will. Because of reasons. I really went off the shits.

4. A character you rarely talk about?

I almost never talk about Neira, Ayo's mom. She's traditionalist, for a Phindian, which means she tends to see people more as extensions of their value to other people and communities rather than individuals. That's what she thinks is most important. She's results-oriented and practical, a skilled negotiator. By the time she had Ayo (who was a surprise late pregnancy), she already had 6 kids and was tired of parenting. Not to say she didn’t put in the effort...but she was tired. Neira made a strong effort to lead Ayo in the right direction, but she let him be passed around with the families of her older children and cousins quite often, rather than keeping him strictly in her home.

She's strong-willed and emotionally withdrawn. She carries the trauma most adults her age do from the Syndicat's rule. Ayo never comes to see eye to eye with her, especially concerning his career as a pilot, which she sees as a selfish and frivolous pursuit. Neira openly regrets not sending him to a boarding school for part of his education, and sees his inability to serve his community and family as her own failing, as much as his.

I answered 11 in a previous ask. This post is going to get long, so

23. Introduce an OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

I think Ayo has changed the most in his iterations. He used to be kind of bland. Still a pilot, still ran away from home to pursue being a pilot, but without any of the trauma or sensation-seeking coping mechanisms. Without any of the nuance or depth. He was just Astrid’s rock, originally. The responsible one in their relationship. It’s funny that the roles have fully reversed. He loved her deeply and put up with her emotional instability and flighty, violent behavior. I was very lonely and hardcore projecting when I created him; it showed.

I think he’s better now. He has purpose as a character outside of some vague sense of eternal love. He has an internal compass and goals that direct his behavior, reasoning that comes from within, not only because of his relationships. All of that has changed about him, and fairly recently (the last couple of years).

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)

Uuuhhh in fandom I take pains to NOT make characters too like me because I’m boring and I’ve got Mary Sue trauma. But. It would be Ponnik, now that I think about it.

He’s a little overweight, totally average height, totally average everything. Smart, sure, but not a genius like Moralo or Osi. He’s really into hologaming, but usually keeps it casual because he’s got a family and a wife to support. He’s the emotional rock, the stable one, the constant. A homebody. A little boring to people who like to go out a lot, honestly. Has a similar sense of humor to me (maybe less meme-y than I am). He’s also got a fluid sort of he/they thing going on that’s pretty similar the blasé way I treat my own gender. Dad culture’s just got a certain appeal.

 38. Which one of your OCs would be the best dancer?

You want technical perfection and physical power, that would be Astrid. But there’s no soul in her dancing, the way there’s no soul in any art she creates. If you want passion, that’s Ayo. But he can only dance at the club. Would be hopeless at something more structured like ballroom dancing.

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

Jesus Christ my standard OFC is the same character every single time I hop fandoms for any reason. I like stone-faced, icy girls with long hair, emotional constipation, and high cheekbones. They’re usually thematically tied to wolves or dogs, even if it’s a universe where I can’t blatantly make a furry (I’ll usually make a furry).

Outside my One True Girl, most of my characters are bi, in part because I gotta rep, and because it’s just easy to write a lived experience. They tend to have complex relationships with their families. Hard to find a character of mine that had a perfectly decent childhood (there are some). They tend to have some manner of mental illness or neurodivergency, even if it’s well-treated and doesn’t negatively impact their lives.

I tend to roll up traits I find funny or interesting like katamari around the concept of a character until it feels fully fleshed out.

[lielowat-lupins]

Favorite Wolfstar Fics thru 2022:

EDITED TO INCLUDE LINKS NOW!

- All the Young Dudes + Out of the Blue (mskingbean89 - 526k words)

- Flight 143 (thebiinbitch - 66k) - Sirius is seated next to his ex-boyfriend Remus on a flight from London to NYC and he has to come to terms with his still-lingering feelings as they continue to run into one another in the city.

- good old-fashioned love boy (all2well - 157k) - After POA, Peter is captured, Remus returns to Hogwarts to teach, and is surprised when Sirius is announced as the new Charms professor.

- that’s the art of getting by (sarewolf - 40k) - Remus is given Harry to raise after Halloween '81, begins raising him in small town, Sirius is freed early on from Azkaban, and moves in to help raise Harry. ANGST

- saccharine (moonymoment - 26k) - Remus falls in love with Sirius, the ghost haunting his apartment, and his love begins to make Sirius more real, but the reality of a future together seems unlikely. (I sobbed)

- To Be Alone With You (Shay_Fae - 16k) Remus's suicide attempt during the summer before 6th year forces Sirius to confront his deeper feelings.

- Of Memories and Milk Thievery (moonymoment - 57k) - Sirius and Remus can't seem to leave each other alone even though they have been divorced for four years and their immaturity and lack of communication really starts to weigh on their son Teddy.

- Billet-Doux en Noir et Blanc (MoonCat457 - 29k) - Remus and Sirius have been hooking up for 7 years, but Remus wants something more and wonders if the trip to Paris that Sirius has just invited him on as his wedding date will finally be his chance.

- How Remus Got His Groove Back (RealityShowJunky - 42k) - When Sirius rejects Remus's love confession, Remus decides he needs to take control of his own life. And Sirius realizes the mistake he made.

- Text Talk (merlywhirls - 141k) - When Sirius texts a wrong number, he accidentally launches into a new friendship with the chronically ill Remus Lupin.

- A Wolf’s Heart (mizdiz - 87k) - After meeting in a bookstore and starting to fall for one another, Remus is hesitant to let himself love Sirius because of his fear of being a burden because of his serious chronic illness. WARNING: will definitely break your heart

- The Incomplete Recounting of Four Nonconsecutive Tuesdays in the Spring of 2002 (BrujaBanter - 11K) - Sirius and Remus decide to try couples therapy to work on their issues after Sirius comes back from the dead years after falling through the Veil.

- The Art of Falling in Love (MessusMinnow - 67k) - Moony and Padfoot start to fall for each other as anonymous texting pen pals without realizing they actually know each other in their real lives.

- all my cards are here (haey1 - 112k) - Bartender Remus joins a band called The Marauders as their new bassist and begins to fall for drummer Sirius. He soon begins to suspect Sirius might have feelings, too, which complicates things as the band rises to fame.

- The Impossible Season (coyotesuspect - 21k) - Sirius returns from the Veil, but he is 17-years-old and doesn't have any memories of what happened to him as an adult. Remus is conflicted about what to do with this new version of Sirius in his life.

- Carry the News (sleepingtigers - 25k) - Set in the ATYD universe, Sirius’s POV after 1981.

- Let Nothing You Dismay (montparnasse - 18k) - Sirius works through his deep feelings for Remus and his confusions about his own self.

- i found you (de_sire - 23k) - Sirius finally finds his Soulmate after searching for years and years, but wonders why Remus didn’t try to find him.

- My Empire of Dirt (FivePips - 15k) - Sirius learns he has terminal cancer and wants to make things right with his ex Remus.

- Just what the doctor ordered (WrappedUp - 96k) - Sirius falls for his new vet Remus after rescuing a puppy, but his immaturity and struggles with loving himself cause the relationship to implode; Sirius works on personal growth and a plan to win the love of his life back.

[moonlayl]

HARRY CENTRIC FIC RECS ‘CUZ IT’S HIS DAY:

Long

Grey Space (1st in a series. completed. gen. 60k)

In 1991, Harry Potter begins his time at Stonewall High, unaware that he is anything more than a boy prone to freakish accidents.

When he turns fourteen, he will receive a letter that will change his life. He will learn he is Harry Potter, and be invited into a world where belonging is his birthright. Until then, he stumbles on, two steps forward and one step back, out of the cupboard and into the life he was never meant to have.

Turning of the Times (incomplete. 2 chapters left. gen. 450k)

After looking into Snape's pensieve, Harry makes up his mind to take charge of his actions—but before he can, he is sent back in time to 1975. He must find his own way back to the future without upsetting the time line, but the Dark Lord is on the rise, and Harry's never been good at keeping his head down.

Canon Divergent after "Snape's Worst Memory" in OotP.

An Hour of the Wolves (incomplete. eventual Hinny. but not there yet. 100k)

Sirius is dead, but Harry's doing alright: between a brand new Quidditch Captaincy, private lessons with Dumbledore, and increasing suspicions about Draco Malfoy, he's got enough to keep him busy. And if an uncomfortable encounter with a classmate ends up leaving him with another challenge to face and even more secrets to keep, well...he's still fine.

Really. He is.

Sleeper (post war. complete. minor!Hinny. 177k)

When he sleeps, Harry dreams of another world - one that is both like his own and not, where the dead are alive, where history took a different course, and where Harry has friends in strange places.

But where are the dreams coming from, and what purpose do they serve? Is the world they show Harry really a figment of his imagination? Can he stop the dreams - and does he really want to?

Knowing Where to Look (incomplete, but not abandoned. different pov, but still harry centric. 200k)

The War is over. At least that’s what everybody keeps saying. But the Reformation has begun, and the work is just beginning. After so much loss— so much pain— how does one pick up the pieces of the Wizarding World and rebuild the Ministry into one that is stronger than it has ever been? The election is approaching, desperate Death Eater attacks continue, and through it all, who can be trusted? Does he even want to be a part of it all?

Innocent Series (five completed works. 6th is updating. 1.3 million words)

my description:  Sirius basically takes an 8 year old Harry from the Dursleys. The first fic of the series is set all before Hogwarts. Highly entertaining, there’s a fic for each year, and many changes and twists that are well thought out and intriguing. There’s enough canon material for it to feel real, but enough changes to be originally entertaining. All the characters are well written and certain things are addressed better and more creatively than the actual hp books. Absolutely love this series, it’s a masterpiece and I’d recommend everyone to read it. The Harry and Sirius interactions in particular give this series life!

HP & the OOTP - AU Rewrite (complete. eventual yet minor Hinny. 450k)

Harry is imprisoned by Lucius Malfoy and Death Eaters after the Third Task - but freedom comes from an ally who will never fully be trusted. While the Ministry investigates Harry leans on his friends, the DA and Sirius to recover and heal until he must face Voldemort again - protected only by Snape whose true allegiance cannot be known. AU rewrite Order of the Phoenix / Fifth Year.

proof (complete. gen. post war. 30k)

Less than a year has passed since the final battle, and the Ministry is already up to its old tricks. Harry would very much like them to stop ignoring due process, tossing people in Azkaban, controlling the press, and menacing the populace with dementors.

He would also like, if at all possible, to bake a passable loaf of bread.

The Article (incomplete. gen. 40k)

One newspaper article upends Harry's Wednesday morning, as he must deal with the consequences of having the reality of his home life splashed across the front page of The Daily Prophet. It might have been bearable if the information was anything less than the absolute truth.

Genius Fratris (incomplete, not abandoned. gen. probably the only fic using this trope that i enjoy. 150k)

Only two people know what happened the night John Potter became the Boy-Who-Lived: Lord Voldemort and Harry Potter. And neither of them are talking.

no voyage (complete. 30k)

The second anniversary of the war dawns on Wizarding Britain and Harry Potter still does not feel anything approaching normal.

He had really thought waking from that 24 hour nap after the Battle of Hogwarts would fix him once and for all, but two years on, he’s still unable to sleep through the night, so jumpy that his girlfriend is worried about him, and he doesn’t know what he wants to do with his life after he failed the psych evaluations necessary to become an Auror. He had never expected to feel perfect two years after the Battle of Hogwarts, not that he knew what that was like, but he *had* expected to be okay.

Good thing Harry Potter's well used to disappointment.

A Fire Doesn’t Seek a Forest, It Burns it All the Same (au. discontinued. gen. 100k)

Halloween, 1981: James Potter gave his life to defend his family. Halloween, 1986: Harry Potter's last public appearance.

Lily Potter (single mother, accomplished mediwitch, newspaper-proclaimed madwoman) would do anything to keep her family safe. Braving Azkaban, denouncing the most powerful wizards in Magical Britain, fleeing to France, and hiding her son's identity are only the first steps. A tale of love beyond reason, sanity, magic, and death.

face death in the hope (harry & regulus centric. incomplete. gen, so far. 250k)

time travel: Harry looks vaguely nervous, scratching the back of his neck. “It's a really long story,” he says finally, almost apologetically, “and it's really hard to believe.” “Try me,” Regulus says, more than a little daringly.

i won’t just survive, no you will see me thrive (complete. gen. 80k)

In which James Potter isn't as dead as everyone thought and Harry has a strong mistrust of all adults. Reconnecting with his son isn't going to be easy, not just because Harry's in Slytherin.

Timely Errors (complete. gen. 130k)

Harry Potter never had much luck, being sent to his parents’ past should have been expected.

Love and Love Again (incomplete. 185k)

Lily and James survived Voldemort's attack, but their infant son was believed dead. Twelve years later, Harry Potter is found and brought home, but the real struggle has just begun. Ensemble fic about a family's recovery as old enemies return.

A Lonely Path (complete. gen. 200k)

At age ten, Harry disappeared. Four years later, a suspiciously familiar boy is found. Remus accepts the task of reintroducing him to the wizarding world, Harry resisting all the while. Between meddlesome ministers and mad escaped convicts, Remus attempts to discover the truth. Where has Harry been? Will he ever learn to trust? Includes child abuse

Too Far From Home (incomplete. gen. 318k)

Transported into a parallel universe, Harry finds himself in the shadow of an evil growing force. Amidst old and new faces and the chance for a family that he never had, Harry must come to the terms that although there are two worlds, there can only be one hero. *AU Dimension travel, No slash, Abuse, Contains Angst*

One-Shot

Memorabilia (gen. angst. birthday fic. cannot recommend enough. 5k)

Harry does not learn his birthday until he is five years old.

Where there’s a will (gen. angst. 8k)

Harry writes the first draft of his will when he’s fourteen.

If we can't find where we belong, we'll have to make it on our own (gen. 3.5k)

Neville's shoulders hunch further. It's not just his hands that are shaking now; his entire body trembles.

It's not fair. And, when push comes to shove, Harry always has been a Gryffindor through and through.

disguised as something else (angst. 3k)

“I used to sleep there,” Harry snaps.

He’s breathing hard. He feels like he’s run a marathon, even though he’s just sitting there uselessly, staring at a perfectly ordinary cupboard.

“What?” Sirius says.

gone was any trace of you (hinny. highly recommend. sweet angst. 24k)

An accident at work left Harry with a mysterious case of amnesia and a wife he couldn’t remember.

put your little hand in mine (16k)

When it ended, Harry loved Teddy more than he ever loved anything or anyone.

Take that, Harry thought spitefully, though he didn’t know, exactly, who it was directed toward. OR: Twelve times Harry chooses his godson and chooses to live, too.

Trouble (gen. 1k)

After being beaten up by Dudley Dursley and his gang, ten-year-old Mark Evans is walked home by a mysterious teenage boy.

i found no cure for the loneliness (gen. dh. 1.6k)

"Have you ever killed anyone?"

Letters from Florida (gen. 3k)

Harry, Andromeda, and Teddy move to Florida after the war. Harry doesn't know what he's looking for, but maybe letters from his friends back home can help him find it.

history keeps pulling me down (gen. 675 words)

Minerva discovers that for all that Harry looks like his father, he doesn’t grieve like him.

brighter than the sun (gen. 2k)

Harry stands unflinchingly between his friends and danger as if that's all he's good for, but Ron has always known why. Ron was twelve when he saw the bars on Harry's windows, but it's not as though he's forgotten.

there will come a time, you’ll see (gen. 11k)

A curse regresses Harry to his seventeen year old self, physically and mentally. He doesn’t recognise this strange peaceful wizarding world, but there are two people he does recognise: Ron and Hermione.

[vaudel]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄; 𝐒𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐒 𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐂𝐊

summary: Sirius Black wakes up in a hospital after the battle of department of mysteries and falls for his nurse, Y/N.

pairing: sirius black x nurse!reader

word count: 1.3k words

warnings: a slighttt bit of angst nothing else it's just fluffy (lmk if there are any other warnings tho!)

a/n: ngl this seems very rushed

reblogs++comments appreciated!!

Sirius woke up in an empty hospital room, dressed in a hospital gown. There was a television in front of his bed which was playing some kind of romance movie.

The yellow paint on the walls was pale, its bright colour had worn down over the years and some patches of paint was scraped off.

The mattress felt thin under his body as he tried to get up but was in vain as the invisible ropes of exhaustion tied him down onto the iron bed.

A nurse walked into the room with a tray of food in her hands. When she saw him awake, she grinned and made her way toward him.

"You're finally awake" she spoke, setting down the tray on the desk. "I'm Y/N" she added.

The man wanted to introduce himself, but he didn't remember his name- or anything.

He wracked his mind trying to get ahold of something- anything. But all he found was a big void filled with nothingness.

"I don't.." He began "remember anything?" he spoke

"Well, I'm not a doc but your memory might come back soon" said Y/N

"What do I do til' then?"

"Rest, you need it, the doc will check up on ya" and with that she gave the  tray to him and trudged out the door.

The man finished his meal and waited. He felt a huge gap inside of him, he was incomplete and he felt a feeling of guilt enveloping his body and mind.

His breathe depended, his mind elevated, he felt as if he were breathing in smoke from the cigarettes from a high school party.

His eyes closed as a tear ran down his face, leaving a streak of salty liquid as it ran down. Fear of what's to come bloomed in his chest. He felt solitude without memories, and guilt for leaving the ones he probably loved behind.

He didn't know of what's to come or what the gods are going to drown him in next, all he knew was that he had to keep sailing the tides even if a bolt of lightning struck his ship.

As the demons of misery, confusion and exhaustion clawed their way up and dragged him down to the depths of slumber where he found a peace of mind.

You trudged down the hallways of the hospital to the doctor's office with the patient files as the screams, coughs and splutters of the patients filled your ears.

You eventually reached the docs office and swung the chipped wooden door  open.

He sat on his chair with his head in his hands with his eyes almost drooping shut before he saw you and jumped.

"Oh! Uhm sorry about that Y/N!" He exclaimed "Must've dozed off"

You let out a chuckle as you set the papers on his desk before stepping back "He's awake" you spoke, but corrected yourself "Sirius is awake."

Doc hummed as he scanned the papers before looking back at you "How'd ya know his name?" He questioned, adjusting his glasses.

"Found a letter" you spoke, "Something related to an Order of Phoenix"

"Must be some be some bar or something, eh?" Doc replied, setting down the papers "They do have such odd names"

You were about to object, the letter did seem important, no one organizes meetings on the fate of something over a bottle of beer, but arguing with doc was talking to a brick wall.

"We should inform the cops of the letter" you spoke "Must be looking for him"

Doc scoffed before letting out a chuckle "No one with the lad's face has gone missing in this city, leave it"

Anger flowed through your veins like molten lava at Doc's statement. He probably is going to make the man's family think that Sirius is gone for good.

Gritting your teeth, you snatched the papers from his desk and immediately left as you briskly walked to Sirius' room.

"Sirius?" You called, peaking from the door to find the man staring up at the ceiling, fidgeting with the fork from his meal.

"Sirius!" You called out, this time he looked toward you, with a look of annoyance and confusion.

"What?" He spoke, looking around. "Your name, its Sirius" you replied, walking over to his bed.

He pursed his lips together and looked up at you "Not gonna lie I thought that I was an Adam" he spoke

You chuckled, now that you thought about it, Sirius Black was a great name for the man in front of you, Adam isn't even debatable, it's laughable.

"What's my last name?" He asked as he still fiddled with the fork

"Black" you replied "Sirius Black"

"Can't say that I don't like it" he contemplated "Don't love it either"

The ends of your mouth tugged up into a smile at the sight of your patient doing well "Well, I'll check up on you in a couple hours" you spoke "Sirius" you added before trudging out the door.

A week later Sirius had been doing really well, you had been working late and talking to Sirius and telling him about the world as the sun set till it rose up back again as you both laughed together.

His heart bloomed looking at you talk about the little things you talked about, he loved your world but he felt astray from it.

But he'd have to adjust, and looking you perk up as he commented on the little things you did was on his mind like clockwork.

Your smile could brighten up the dark and gloomy pits of hell, and your soft touch could even soften the roughest of rocks.

He feared the day he would have to leave as you worked in the hospital at day and left by night back home, probably forgetting his very existence in a couple months.

So on the day he left, walking out the hospital with the couple dollars you had given him, away and away with the feeling of only a string connecting to you him as his ship sailed through gloomy tides with the rain of sadness pouring down.

You walked through the town, with your bags in either of your hands as your face scrunched up from the city bustle of the chitter and chatter of the people and the honks of vehicles.

The bags felt heavy in your hands as you drooped a bit from the bags weighing you down. You barely had any time for buying groceries.

Sirius had not contacted you at all, even after having your phone number and address in the small, frail paper you had given to him before he walked away, as the corners raised up in a bittersweet smile, oblivious to him not talking to you again.

He was amazing, a humorous man who could earn a chuckle out you from just a sentence, he was so nice to talk to, with his small smirks and gestures which made you blush like a high-schooler talking to her crush.

You didn't realize as your head swirled with thoughts of the man and you swam through the heavenly place of imagination, your soft-smiling figure bumped into someone.

"Oh! I'm so sorry si-" you spoke as you looked up and your sorrowful face turned into a one of surprise "Sirius!" you exclaimed, dropping your bags to hug the man.

"Hello little dove" he said, wrapping his arms around your waist and giving you a peck on the cheek. You weren't sure which one of the actions made you blush more, the nickname or the kiss.

After a few seconds you pulled away, with wide grins plastered on your faces along with your soft rose painted cheeks.

"Where were you!" you exclaimed, watching Sirius bend down to pick up one of your bags as you picked up the other.

"I was a tad bit busy in looking for a cheap place to stay and getting a job" he spoke with guilt "I'm sorry Y/N"

"You better be" you frowned with a huff but instantly broke into a grin, unable to be mad at the sweet raven haired man who you hadn't heard from in months.

"I can make it up to you though" said Sirius as you two walked the bustling streets of the city "How about a date?" he grinned.

[thegirlwhowrites642]

Why Ginny fell in love with Harry? His personality and morality he's funny, humble, determined, selfless, powerful, generous, brave, strong, fearless, independent, smart, passionate and dedicated to his friends and love ones and extraordinary amazing person.She had an crush on the boy who lived but fell in love with Harry Potter himself.Many say she's perfect for Harry ( which is true) but people forget how perfect Harry is for Ginny. I really think she would feel incomplete and suffering very much without Harry ( in this situation if he died first) because this man is literally her anchor and her best source of happiness and hang out and does understands way more than her family ever and this man will do anything to keep her safe and she loves this side because she feel in love with his morality ( and traits i mentioned above). What's your thoughts on this?

Ok, well, I think I've said it to the point of exasperation on this blog that Harry and Ginny are soulmates so Harry dying is definitely not a pleasant scenery for Ginny.

I think it goes without being said that a Ginny without Harry would never be as happy as a Ginny with Harry.

I don't think she would ever marry or marry again if he died within their marriage. Honestly, Ginny is pretty family-oriented but from how I see it I don't even think she would have ever had children with someone that wasn't Harry, like even in some weird scenery where he didn't die. Maybe she would have adopted alone if that was a possibility.

But, going back to dead Harry, what I also think is that she would be able to still have a life worthy of being lived without him, and I don't think I can say the same for Harry.

(I need to get into Harry's pov for a second to properly explain this.)

It's not about Harry loving Ginny more because that wouldn't be true, it's just about their lives. Harry's death sequence is a very significant scene in terms of allegory. Harry sees the family who waits for him in death and he thinks he is ready to die, but his last thought is of Ginny because she is the family he can have in life, his future. Not to be dramatic but she is literally the reason why he comes back. Harry has a hard time accepting love that doesn't come from official bonds (for obvious reasons), which is why Sirius instantly becomes so important to him, and why when in DH he thinks of family he thinks only of Ginny. The other Weasleys and Hermione are substitutes for roles that should have been covered by people that died or were never born. But Sirius was always his godfather, he wasn't stealing a role that should have been of someone else. The same goes for Ginny. Emotionally speaking, in DH Harry pretty much already considers Ginny his wife. And that's a role she would have had regardless of any death.

If Ginny died, Harry would have no place where he feels like he belongs. It's established more than once and particularly in the death sequence that Ginny is home over even Hogwarts. He looks at Ginny and wishes to go home but then he bitterly thinks that Hogwarts is his home, because he has no family (he is leaving behind the only one he has, they are broken up, and he can't even say goodbye).

This is not true for Ginny, she has a home and a family without Harry. Again, she would never feel complete without him and she would be absolutely destroyed for years, and she would never find anyone who would understand her truly as Harry does. But she has a support system that eventually would make her able to keep living and not just existing.

[toofarovertherainbow]

wolfstar fic rec

adding to the fic rec post collection!! i’m not going to include stuff i’ve seen everywhere else so here’s my personal faves. here’s some wolfstar i’ve been reading lately:

just what the doctor ordered by wrappedup

my fave fave wolfstar fic!! explicit, smutty, angsty, heartwarming, it has it all!! this one has an age gap so if you’re not a fan maybe skip it but genuinely it’s so good. if u love character development, finding yourself, and reflections on healthy relationships this is for you.

the maddest house by busaikko

this one is such a great wolfstar raising harry one. it really combines the war with parenting so well and is a little heartbreaking but with a great ending. rated e but tbf i cannot rmr how graphic it is

the lab by de_sire

this one was SO GOOD. another age gap and brilliant characterisation of sirius. i’ve seen ppl saying they hate it when writers make sirius ‘too annoying’ and i feel as though this one combines his cheekiness with reality so well. this one is v angsty and features an abusive relationship but is also heartwarming and gives u a glowy feeling inside. rated e.

led by a light of a star sweetly gleaming by wolfpants

if you haven’t read this fic and u love historical aus what on earth are u doing??!! it’s so good. remus is brilliant, sirius is charming and enigmatic. i really really enjoyed their dynamic and the muted greens and greys this fic seems to exude are just mwah. rated e, be careful of the homophobia due to the time period

another go by welshremus

the centre of this fic truly is relationships and it has such a happy ending i can’t recommend it enough. it portrays the push-pull of soulmates and their obstacles so well and it made me scream while reading it. remus’ secrets come unravelled in such an interesting way and the way in which both characters are so desperately flawed was so enjoyable to read. rated e, i would warn for kinda gruesome stuff but nothing graphic and toxic relationships ofc

dear your holiness by mollymarymarie

a fic rec without this fic, imo, is not complete nowadays. it’s so brilliant. i just love how wild remus is in this, i loved him so much. every word in this is so purposeful and it all builds up so perfectly, i cannot rave about it enough. it’s e with brilliantly charged smut scenes, it’s emotional, it’s angsty, the kids will warm your heart. if you haven’t read it or something’s holding you back: give it a chance!!

incomplete fics that i love as well:

i’m fine by imaginer012

major tw for self-harm as it is the focus of this fic. i think this fic accurately portrays what too many of us know too much about. sirius and remus are so lovely and their maturity and relationship with snape i think is something that this fic does well. i would highly recommend it for everyone who enjoys wolfstar raising harry.

1989 by oceanicfeelings

this one is just really sweet. baby/toddler/small child harry is my favourite parts of raising harry fics i just think he’s so adorable. remus’ characterisation here and the recognition that after years of werewolf transformations he’s going to be injured is really great!!

precious love by adrianmanwaring

i love this fic so much. it’s cute, it’s fun, it’s a little angsty and it has teacher remus!! the premise is that sirius and remus raise teddy as their foster and then adoptive child and it’s great. it’s well worth a cute, fluffy read.