Omg that’s story is horrifying. I think I keep forgetting that things like this actually happen, the movie tho scarred me and made me question if I should go the arranged marriage route, I’m 25 now and I’ve always been the good girl who didn’t talk to boys “cause my parents wouldn’t like it. “Now I’m just resentful lately, because I never dated in my prime because of them, I’m too naive now and I know for a fact I will fall for literally anyone who will show me the slightest bit of affection. My parents are now mad at me because I gained weight , like 20 kgs (lost 10.)I gained because of the anxiety meds which I take secretly without my dad knowing . They think I look too ugly for them to find grooms now and it’s my fault I’m still fat at 25.
Sorry for the trauma dumping. Just felt like sharing with you specifically. For some reason.
I always thought I’ll have a cute guy handed to me in arranged marriage and it will be all roses. This movie was actually a rude awakening.
- med student anon
ma'am, you are 25 and you think your prime is gone????? IMMA HAVE TO FIGHT WHOEVER SAID THIS TO YOU CAUSE???? PSHAW PSSSS PFUFJSKSJCJCF PSSSSSHHHHHH your prime is literally now and is going to be here for 10+ years. the prime in life is whenever you feel like it. it can at 50, 20 or 70. forever 21 is a ruse for the capitalists to dupe young and gullible adults into thinking that they are only young when they are in their early twenties.
you are doing medical, of course you have been busy in your life! and you can think of not having dated so far as a positive thing too. for you, relationships are a clean state and after all the truths and horror of the world, you can better choose a person for you. kids like me who started dating in high school, bruh we didn't know any better. both my relationships have given me some major ass trauma that i still have not forgiven myself for. i don't blame myself that i deserved shit but i blame myself for not seeing things for what they were and letting my dumb teen brain take dumb decisions.
i am not saying that people who start dating young have it worse or that it always turns out bad. but in your case, you can choose to look at it this way.
you are in your prime, you are mature, you are well-educated and you are perfectly capable of making informed decisions which will serve you right.
see, arranged marriages are what it literally means, "arranged", the parties in the marriage are rarely in it to make an emotional bond, it's mostly a task and we know brown parents and how they love to keep us away from anything which will help have some emotional maturity. both the parties are coaxed into marrying each other cause marriage is a task that the parents have to get done or else the society will blame them for being incompetent parents. you know finding the "perfect" groom or bride for their children is one of the milestones of being a competent parent in brown society.
oh, mi amore, you are not fat nor are you ugly. if gaining weight was wrong then by nature the human body wouldn't be so flexible to lose and/or gain weight. we are made a certain way cause that's how life works. you can never be ugly cause beauty is hella subjective. like personally, i rarely find models or people who are proclaimed to have "the perfect face" attractive. they look too plastic to me, like something which takes away from them being "human".
be yourself, be whatever and however you want to be and the right person will see you for who you are cause that makes you, you. if it isn't this person, then it'll be that person and so on and so forth. 8 billion+ people on this forsaken planet and you have to settle for someone who doesn't treat you right? sacrilegious!
go out, date, make mistakes, always try to keep yourself from getting hurt but do what feels right for you ✨
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a man self immolated in front of the israeli embassy in washington dc yesterday. not just any man. an active member of the us air force. he live streamed his death, and said that he refused to be complicit in a genocide any longer. he said that compared to what palestinians were facing every day, setting himself alight was nothing.
let me reiterate. an active duty air force member burned himself alive because he was so disgusted by what the us government was openly supporting. he live-streamed his own suicide, so the whole world could bear witness as a man in his military uniform set himself on fire to protest his government’s complicity in the horrors that we have all been forced to watch happen in real time. he became a new horror. footage of the immolation blurs him out the moment the fire catches, but you can hear him. it is over in seconds, really, but you can hear him screaming. he shouts “free palestine” until his body physically cannot make any sounds other than guttural screams of agony. and then he falls silent. a police officer arrives and points a gun at his still burning body, shouting at him to get down on the ground. and it is over.
his name was Aaron Bushnell. he was twenty five years old. and he isn’t here anymore because the political ruling class has decided that genocide is perfectly fine as long as it preserves imperialism. in the coming days, people will try to discredit him. to say that he was mentally unstable. they will try to bury his actions to save face and defend israel’s propaganda. do not let them. aaron knew what he was doing. he knew what he was doing when he put on his military uniform, set up his twitch stream, and made his final walk up to the embassy. he knew what would happen to him when he flicked that lighter. do not let them forget. aaron’s blood is on the hands of the political ruling class.
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my prof just explained on the syllabus that he’s included more points in the class than we needed to pass, so we could skip up like?? 20 small assignments/quizzes/participation!! and still get a very high grade!!
the idea was that we could focus on assignments that played to our strengths - only do the participation stuff if we like to talk out loud - only do the quizzes/readings if we want to do the class remotely - only do online discussions if we like to talk and share opinions but struggle with anxiety in class ect.
and that’s cool enough but then he pulled up DnD character sheets with drawings he’d done of these hypothetical student player classes and how our various accessibility needs could be gamified to ‘max out’ different aspects of the class to get high grades and like!!!!!
hell yeah!!!! let’s treat accessibility in higher education not just as a necessity but as the fun, engaging, and creative aspect of learning that it is!!! I love this!!
EDIT: For proper credit or further questions about his system please find my professor on twitter @/kurtishanlon
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can you believe that we have fanfiction. that we have websites dedicated to fanfiction. that there is a place that you can go and read tens, hundreds, thousands and thousands of pieces of writing that strangers have made. people who are not "writers". people who come home at the end of the day and have feelings and say, i am going to put that into words. i am going to share those words. short, long, sweet, sad, horny, funny, wonderful words. we are all just human and we all love to make and remake and share that with others. can you believe that.
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i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".
it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.
do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.
but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.
do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).
you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.
walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.
no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.
do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."
you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.
there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.
i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.
he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."
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