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blackswaneuroparedux · 9 months

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Anonymous ask: What do you think of the new Indiana Jones movie? And of Phoebe Waller-Bridge?

In a nutshell: From start to finish ‘Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny’ is watching Indiana Jones being a broken-down shell of a once great legacy character who has to be saved by the perfect younger and snarky but stereotypical ’Strong Independent Woman’ that passes for women characters in popcorn movies today.

I went in to this film with conflicted feelings. On the one hand I was genuinely excited to see this new Indiana Jones movie because it’s Indiana Jones. Period. Yet, on the other hand I feared how badly Lucasfilm, under Kathleen Kennedy’s insipid woke inspired CEO studio direction, was going to further tarnish not just a screen legend but the legacy of both George Lucas and Steven Spielberg. The cultural damage she has done to such a beloved franchise as the Star Wars universe in the name of progressive woke ideology is criminal. The troubled production history behind this film and its massive $300 million budget (by some estimates) meant Disney had a lot riding on it, especially with the future of Kathleen Kennedy on the line too as she was hands on with this film.

To me the Indiana Jones movies (well, the first three anyway, the less we say about ‘Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’ the better) were an important part of my childhood. I fell in love with the character instantly. Watching ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ (first on DVD in my boarding school dorm with other giggly girls and later on the big screen at a local arts cinema retrospective on Harrison Ford’s stellar career) just blew me away.

As a girl I wanted to be an archaeologist and have high falutin’ adventures; I even volunteered in digs in Pakistan and India (the Indus civilisation) as well as museum work in China as a teen growing up in those countries and discovering the methodical and patient but back breaking reality of what archaeology really was. But that didn’t dampen my spirit. Just once I wanted to echo Dr. Jones, ‘This belongs in a museum!’ But I happily settled for studying Classics instead and enjoyed studying classical archaeology on the side.

I couldn’t quite make sense why Indiana Jones resonated with me more than any other action hero on the screen until much later in life. Looking like Harrison Ford certainly helps. But it’s more than that. I’ve written this elsewhere but it’s worth repeating here.

‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ is considered an inspiration for so many action films yet there’s a very odd aspect to the film that’s rather unique and rarely noticed by its critics and fans. It’s an element that, once spotted, is difficult to forget, and is perhaps inspiring for times like the one in which we currently live, when there are so many challenges to get through. Typically in action films, the hero faces an array of obstacles and setbacks, but largely solves one problem after another, completes one quest after another, defeats one villain after another, and enjoys one victory after another.

The structure of ‘Raiders’ is different. A quick reminder:

- In the opening sequence, Indiana Jones obtains the temple idol only to lose it to his rival René Belloq (Paul Freeman). - In the streets of Cairo, Indy fails to protect his love, Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen), from being captured (killed, he assumes). - In the desert, he finds the long-lost Ark of the Covenant, only to have it taken away by Belloq. - Indy then recovers the ark only to have it stolen a second time by Belloq, this time at sea. - On an island, Indy tries to bluff Belloq into thinking he’ll blow up the ark. His bluff fails. Indy is captured. - The climax of the film literally has its hero tied to a post the entire time. He’s completely ineffectual and helpless at a point in the movie where every other action hero is having their greatest moment of struggle and, typically, triumph.

If Indiana Jones had done absolutely nothing, if the famed archeologist had simply stayed home, the Nazis would have met the same fate - losing their lives to ark’s wrath because they opened it. It’s pretty rare in action films for the evil arch-villains to have the same outcome as if the hero had done nothing at all.

Indy does succeed in getting the ark back to America, of course, which is crucial. But then Indy loses the ark, once again, when government agents send it to a warehouse and refuse to let him study the object he chased the whole film. In other words: Indiana Jones spends ‘Raiders’ failing, getting beat up, and losing every artefact that he risks his life to acquire. And yet, Indiana Jones is considered a great hero.

The reason Indiana Jones is a hero isn��t because he wins. It’s because he never stops trying. I think this is the core of Indiana Jones’ character.

Critics will go on about something called agency as in being active or pro-active. But agency can be reactive and still be kinetic to propel the story along. It’s something that has progressively got lost as the series went on. With the latest Indiana Jones film I felt that Indiana Jones character had no agency and ends up being a relatively passive character. Sadly Indiana Jones ends up being a grouchy, broken, and beat up passenger in his own movie.

Released in 1981, ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ remains one of the most influential blockbusters of all time. Exciting action, exotic adventure, just the right amount of romance, good-natured humour, cutting-edge special effects: it was all there, perfectly balanced. Since then, attempts have been made to reproduce this winning recipe in different narrative contexts, sometimes successfully (’Temple of Doom’ and ‘the Last Crusade’), usually in vain (’Crystal Skull’).

What are the key ingredients of an Indiana Jones movie? There are only four core elements - leaving aside aspects of story such as the villain or the goal - that you need in place before anything else. They are: the wry, world-weary but sexy masculine performance of Harrison Ford; the story telling genius of George Lucas steeped in the lore of Saturday morning action hero television shows of the 1950s; the deft visual story telling and old school action direction of Steven Spielberg; and the sublime and sweeping music of the great John Williams. This what made the first three films really work.

In the latest Indiana Jones film, you only have one. Neither Lucas and Spielberg are there and arguably neither is Harrison Ford. John Williams’ music score remains imperious as ever. His music does a lot of heavy lifting in the film and let’s face it, his sublime music can polish any turd.

This isn’t to say the ‘Dial of Destiny’ is a turd. I won’t go that far, and to be honest some of the critical reaction has been over-hysterical. Instead I found it enjoyable but also immensely frustrating more than anything else. It had potential to be a great swan song film for Indy because it had an exciting collection of talent behind it.

In the absence of Spielberg, one couldn’t do worse than to pick James Mangold as next best to direct this film. Mangold is a great director. I am a fan of his body of work. After ‘Copland’, ‘Walk the Line’, ‘Logan’ and ‘Le Mans 66’ (or ‘Ford vs Ferrari’), James Mangold has been putting together a fine career shaped by his ability to deliver stories that rediscover a certain old-fashioned charm without abusing the historical figures - real or fictional - he tackles. And after Johnny Cash, Wolverine and Ken Miles, among others, I had high hopes he would keep the flame alive when it came to Indiana Jones. Mangold grew up as a fanboy of Spielberg’s work and you can clearly see that in his approach to directing film.

But in this film his direction lacks vitality. Mangold, while regularly really good, drags his feet a little here because he’s caught between putting his own stamp on the film and yet also lovingly pay homage to his hero, Spielberg. It’s as if he didn't dare give himself away completely, the director seems too modest to really take the saga by the scruff of the neck, and inevitably ends up suffering from the inevitable comparison with Steven Spielberg.

Mangold tries to recreate the nostalgic wonder of the originals, but doesn't quite succeed, while succumbing to an overkill of visual effects that make several passages seem artificial. The action set pieces range from pedestrian to barely satisfying. The prologue sequence was vaguely reminiscent of past films but it was still a little too reliant on CGI. The much talked about de-ageing of Harrison Ford on screen was impressive (and one suspects a lot of the film budget was sunk right there). But Indiana’s lifeless digitally de-aged avatar fighting on a computer-generated train, made the whole sequence feel like the Nazi Polar Express. Because it didn’t look real, there was no sense of danger and therefore no emotional investment from the audience. You know Tom Cruise would have done it for real and it would have looked properly cinematic and spectacular.

The tuk tuk chase through the narrow streets of Tangiers was again an exciting echo of past films, especially ‘Raiders’, but goes on a tad too long, but the exploration of the ship wreck (and a criminally underused cameo by Antonio Banderas) was disappointing and way too short.

The main problem here is the lack of creativity in the conception of truly epic scenes, because these are not dependent on Ford's age. Indeed, the film could very well have offered exhilarating action sequences worthy of the archaeologist with the whip, without relying solely on the physicality of its leading man. You don't need a Tom Cruise to orchestrate great moments but you could do worse than to follow his example.

Mangold uses various means of locomotion to move the character - train, tuk tuk, motorbike, horse - and offers a few images that wouldn't necessarily be seen elsewhere (notably the shot of Jones riding a horse in the middle of the underground), but in the end shows himself to be rather uninspired, when the first three films in the saga conceived some of the most inventive sequences in the genre and left their mark on cinema history. There are no really long shots, no iconic compositions, no complex shots that last and enrich a sequence, which makes the film look too smooth and prevents it from giving heft to an adventure that absolutely needs it.

And so now to the divisive figure of Phoebe Waller-Bridge.

It’s important here to separate the person from the character. I like Phoebe Waller-Bridge and I loved her in her ‘Fleabag’ series. She excels in a very British setting. I think she is funny, irreverent, and a whip smart talented writer and performer. I also think she has a particular frigid English beauty and poise about her. When I say poise I don’t mean the elegant poise of a Parisienne or a Milanese woman, but someone who is cute and comfortable in her own skin. You would think she would be more suited to ‘Downton Abbey’ setting than all out Hollywood action film. But I think she almost pulls it off here.

In truth over the years Phoebe Waller-Bridge, known for her comedy, has been collecting franchises where she is able to inflict her saucy humour into a hyper-masculine space. I don’t think her talent was properly showcased here.

Hollywood has this talent for plucking talented writers and actors who are exceptional in what they do and then hire them do something entirely different by either miscasting them or making them write in a different genre. I think Phoebe Waller-Bridge is exceptional and she might just rise if she is served by a better script.

In the end I think she does a decent stab at playing an intriguing character in Helena Shaw, Indy’s long lost and estranged god daughter and a sort of amoral rare artefacts hustler. Phoebe Waller-Bridge brings enthusiasm, charm and mischief to the role, making her a breath of fresh air. She seems to be the only member of the on-screen cast that looks to be enjoying themselves.

To be fair her I thought Waller-Bridge was a more memorable and interesting female character than either Kate Capshaw (’Temple of Doom’, 1984) and Alison Doody (’Last Crusade’, 1989). She certainly is a marked improvement on the modern woke inspired insipid female action leads such as Brie Larson (’Captain Marvel’), or any women in the Marvel universe for that matter, or Katherine Waterson (’Alien Covenant’). Waller-Bridge could have been reminiscent of Kathleen Turner (’Romancing the Stone’) and more recently Eva Green, actresses who command attention on screen and are as captivating, if not more so, than the male protagonists they play opposite.

To be sure there have been strong female leads before the woke infested itself into Hollywood story telling but they never made it central to their identity. Sigourney Weaver in ‘Alien’ and Linda Hamilton in the ‘Terminator’ franchise somehow conveyed strength of character with grit and perseverance through their suffering, while also being vulnerable and confident to pull through and succeed. Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s character isn’t quite that. She doesn’t get into fist fights or overpowers big hulking men but she uses cheek and charm to wriggle out of tight spots. She’s gently bad ass rather the dull ‘strong independent woman’ cardboard caricatures that Marvel is determined to ram down every girl’s throat. If Waller-Bridge’s character was better written she might well have been able to revive memories of the great ladies of Hollywood's golden age who had the fantasy and the confidence that men quaked at their feet.

What lets her character down is the snark. She doesn’t pepper her snark but she drowns in it. All of it directed at poor Indy and mocking him for his creaking bones and his entire legacy. It’s a real eyesore and it is a real let down as it drags the story down and clogs up the wheels that power the kinetic energy that an adventure with Indiana Jones needs. ‘The grumpy old man and the young woman with the wicked repartee set off across the vast world’ schtick is all well and good, but it does grate and by the end it makes you angry that Indy has put up with this crap. I can understand why many are turned off by Waller-Bridge’s character. As a female friend of mine put it, we get the talented Phoebe Waller Bridge’s bitter and unlikable Helena acting like a bitter and unlikable man. But it could be worse, it could be as dumb as Shia LaBeouf‘s bad Fonzie impersonation in 'Crystal Skull’.

I would say there is a difference between snark and sass. Waller-Bridge’s character is all snark. If the original whispers are true the original script had her way more snarkier towards Indy until Ford threatened to leave the project unless there were re-writes, then it shows how far removed the producers and writers were from treating Indy Jones with the proper respect a beloved legacy character deserves. It’s also lazy story telling.

Karen Black gave us real sass with Marion Ravenwood in ‘Raiders’. Her character was sassy, strong, but also vulnerable and romantic. She plays it pitch perfect. Of all the women in Indy’s life she was good foil for Indy.

Spielberg is so underrated for his mise-en-scène. We first meet Marion running a ramshackle but rowdy tavern in Tibet (she’s a survivor). She plays and wins a drinking game (she’s a tough one), she sees Indy again and punches him (she’s angry and hurt for her abandoning her and thus revealing her vulnerability). She has the medallion and becomes a partner (she’s all business). She evades and fights off the Nazis and their goons, she even uses a frying pan (she’s resourceful but not stupid). She tries on dresses (she’s re-discovers her femininity). Indy saves her but she picks him up at the end of the film by going for a drink (she’s healing and there’s a chance of a new start for both of them). This is a character arc worth investing in because it speaks to truth and to our reality.

The problem with Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s character is that she is constantly full on with the snark. Indy and Helena gripe and moan at each other the entire film. Indy hasn’t seen her in years, and she felt abandoned after her father passed, so there’s a lot of bitterness. It’s not unwarranted, but it also isn’t entertaining. It’s never entertaining if the snark makes the character too temperamental and unsympathetic for the audience to be emotionally invested in her.

I think overall the film is let down by the script. Again this is a shame. The writing talent was there. Jez and John-Henry Butterworth worked with James Mangold on ‘Ford v. Ferrari’ and co-wrote ‘Edge of Tomorrow‘ while David Koepp co-wrote the first ‘Mission: Impossible’ (but he also penned Indiana Jones and the ‘Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’, and the 2017 version of ‘The Mummy’ that simultaneously started and destroyed Universal’s plans for their Dark Universe). I love the work of Jez Butterworth who is one of England’s finest modern playwrights and he seemed to have transitioned fine over to Hollywood. But as anyone knows a Hollywood script has always too many cooks in the kitchen. There are so many fingerprints of other people - studio execs and directors and even stars - that a modern Hollywood script somehow resembles a sort of Ship of Theseus. It’s the writer’s name on the script but it doesn’t always mean they wrote or re-wrote every word.

Inevitably things fall between the cracks and you end up filming from the hip and hoping you can stitch together a coherent narrative in post-production editing. Clearly this film suffered from studio interference and many re-writes. And it shows because there is no narrative fluidity at work in the film.

Mads Mikkelsen’s Nazi scientist is a case in point. I love Mikkelsen especially in his arthouse films but I understand why he takes the bucks for the Hollywood films too. But in this film he is phoning in his performance. Mads Mikkelsen does what he can with limited screen time to make an impact but this character feels so recycled from other blockbusters. Here the CIA and US Government are evil and willing to let innocent Americans be murdered in order to let their pet Nazi rocket scientist pursue what they believe to be a hobby. But to be fair the villains in the Indy movies have never truly been memorable with perhaps Belloq, the French archaeologist and nemesis of Indy in ‘Raiders’, the only real exception. It’s just been generic bad guys - The Nazis! The Thugee death cult! The Nazis (again)! The Commies! Now we’re back to Nazis again which is not only safer ground for the Indy franchise but something we can all get behind.

However Mads Mikkelsen’s Dr. Voller, is the blandest and most generic Nazi villain in movie history. At the end of World War II, Voller was recruited by the US Government to aid them in rocket technology. Now that he’s completed his task and man has walked on the moon, he’s turning his genius to his ultimate purpose, the recovery of the ‘Dial of Destiny’ built by Archimedes. Should he find both pieces of the ancient treasure, he plans to return to 1930s Nazi Germany, usurp Hitler, and use his advanced knowledge of rocket propulsion to win the war. In a sense then he was channeling his inner Heidegger who felt Hitler had let down Nazism and worse betrayed Heidegger himself.

So there is a character juxtaposition between Voller and Indy in the sense both men feel more comfortable in the past than the present. But neither is given face time together to explore this intriguing premise that could have anchored the whole narrative of the film. It’s a missed opportunity and instead becomes a failure of character and story telling.

Then there are the one liners which seemed shoe horned in to make the studio execs or the writers feel smug about themselves. There are several woke one lines peppered throughout the film but are either tone deaf or just stupid.

“You trigger happy cracker”- it’s uttered without any self-awareness by a black CIA agent who is chaperoning the Nazi villain. Just because white people think it’s dumb and aren’t bothered by it doesn’t make it any less a racial slur. If you want authenticity then why not use the ’N’ word then as it would historically appropriate in 1969? The hypocrisy is what’s offensive.

“You stole it. He stole it. I stole it. It’s called capitalism.” - capitalism 101 for economic illiterate social justice warriors.

“[I’m] daring, beautiful, and self-sufficient” - uttered by Helena Shaw as a snarky reminder that she’s a strong independent woman, just in case you forgot.

“It’s not what you believe but how hard you believe.” - Indiana Jones has literally stood before the awesome power of God when the Ark of the Covenant was opened up by the Nazis, and they paid the price for it by having their faces melted off. Indy has drunk from the authentic cup of Christ, given to him by a knight who’s lived for centuries, that gave him eternal life and heal his father from a fatal bullet wound. So he’s figuratively seen the face of God (sure, he closed his eyes) and His holy wrath, and has witnessed the divine healing power of Christ first hand. And yet his spews out this drivel. It’s empty of any meaning and is a silly nod to our current fad that it’s all about the truth of our feelings, not observable facts or truth.

For me though the absolute worse was what they did to Indiana Jones as a character. Once the pinnacle of masculinity, a brave and daring man’s man whose zest for life was only matched by his brilliance, Henry Jones Jr. is now a broken, sad, and lonely old man. Indiana Jones is mired in the past. Not in the archaeological past, but in his own personal past. He's asleep at the wheel, losing interest in his own life. He's lost his son, he's losing his wife. He's been trying to pass on his passion, his understanding to disinterested people. They're not so interested in looking at the past. He remains a man turned towards the past, and then he finds himself confronted by Helena, who embodies the future. This nostalgia, this historical anchoring, becomes the main thread of the story.The film tries to deconstructs Indiana Jones on the cusp of retirement from academia and confronts him with a world he no longer understands. That’s an interesting premise and could have made for a great film.

It’s clear that the filmmakers’ intention was for a lost and broken Indiana to recapture his spirit by the film’s end. However, its horrible pacing and meandering and underdeveloped plot, along with Harrison Ford’s miserably sad demeanour in nearly every scene, make for a deeply depressing movie with an empty and unearned resolution.

By this I mean at the very end of the film. It’s meant to be daring and it is. There’s something giddy about appearing during the middle of siege of Syracuse by blood thirsty Romans and then coming face to face with Archimedes himself. The film seems to want to justify the legendary, exceptional aura and character of Indy himself by including him in History. Hitherto wounded deep down inside, and now also physically wounded, Indy the archaeologist tells Helena that he wants to stay here and be part of history.

It's a lovely and even moving moment, and you wonder if the film isn't going to pull a ‘Dying Can Wait’ by having its hero die in order to strengthen its legend. But in a moment that is too brutal from a rhythmic point of view, Helena refuses, knocks out her godfather and takes him back to the waiting plane and back to 1969. The next thing Indy sees he’s woken up back in his shabby apartment in New York.

I felt cheated. I’m sure Indy did too.

After all it was his choice. But Helena robbed him of the freedom to make his own decisions. She’s the one to decide what’s best. In effect she robbed him of agency. Even if it was the wrong decision to stay back in time, it’s so important from a narrative and character arc perspective that Indy should have had his own epiphany and make the choice to come back by himself because there is something worth living for in the future present - and that was reconciling with Marion his estranged wife. But damn it, he had to come to that decision for himself, and not have someone else force it upon him. That’s why the ending feelings so unearned and why the story falls flat as a soufflé when you piss on it.

‘Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny’ feels like the type of sequel that aimed to capture the magic of its predecessors, had worthwhile intentions, and a talented cast, but it just never properly materialised. In a movie whose pedigree, both in front and behind the camera, is virtually unassailable, it’s inexcusable that this team of filmmakers couldn’t achieve greater heights.

The film was a missed opportunity to give a proper send off to a cinematic legend. Harrison Ford proving that whatever gruff genre appeal he possessed in his heyday has aged better than Indy’s knees. He may be 80, but Ford carries the weight of the film, which, for all its gargantuan expense, feels a bit like those throwaway serials that first inspired Lucas - fun while it lasts, but wholly forgettable on exit.

I wouldn’t rate ‘Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny’ as the worst film in the franchise - that dubious honour still lies with ‘Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’. Indeed the best I can say is that I would rate this film at the benchmark of “not quite as bad as Crystal Skull”.But it’s definitely time to retire and hang up the fedora and the bull whip.

For what’s worth I always thought the ending of ‘Last Crusade’ where Indy, his father Henry Jones Snr., and his two most faithful companions, Sallah and Marcus Brody, ride off into the sunset was the most fitting way to say goodbye to a beloved character.

Instead we have in ‘Dial of Destiny’ the very last scene which is meant to be this perfect ending: Indiana Jones in his scruffy pyjamas and his shabby apartment. Sure, the exchange between a reconciling Indy and Marion is sincere and touching. But that only works because it explicitly recalls ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’. That's what Nietzsche would call “an eternal return”.

I shall eternally return to watch the first three movies to delight in the adventures of the swashbuckling archaeologist with the fedora and a bull whip. The last two dire films will be thrown into the black abyss. Something even Nietzsche would have approved of.

Thanks for your question.

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artist-issues · 2 months

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I’ve just come across your Wish analysis (which led to binge-reading loads of your other Disney rants, which I so loved reading and totally appreciated), and you’ve got me thinking. So please allow me to rant for a bit.

Flash back to when the live-action Beauty and the Beast came out. My friend loved it, raved about it for ages, and made me go see it with her. The original was my favourite childhood movie so I was excited for the new one… and subsequently disappointed to an extreme. I couldn’t put my finger on it for ages - just that there was a general feeling of wrongness I couldn’t explain (until I read your post and I was just like, “YES! THIS EXACTLY!”). My friend couldn’t understand it and would say things like, “I thought you said you liked Beauty and the Beast!” But I do like it, and that’s why I’m so upset how badly they missed the point.

It feels like that’s all Disney is doing these days: missing the point! Because it doesn’t matter how many times they give us a sassy girl with long hair and some vague magic skill that helps her in the third act! We want characters. As in, people who remind us of actual people! What makes Belle so charming and relatable? She’s polite when other people are rude, but firm when they push against her morals, and enjoys reading. A relatable female character is one who can be compared to other female characters. Belle on her own is just a girl who likes books, but against the motherly Mrs Potts who takes care of everyone, or the vain triplets who only want Gaston’s attention, she’s suddenly so much more real, and that’s what these new films are missing!

Anyway, I could go on and on about this, but I’m sorry because I didn’t mean for this to get so long or out-of-hand 😬

That is why you like it: that is why you’re upset; because you DO like the real Beauty & the Beast! Wonderful! Yes, you get it!

I think what makes Belle feel real is some of the raw emotion she shows—and how she shows it.

When living furniture puts on a light show, she gasped and claps and dances along. When the Beast asks her a romantic but loaded question, her first impulse is to say “yes!” but then she does double back and admit that she misses her father; she doesn’t have all her thoughts collected, exactly, but she is being honest. When wolves attack her, she screams. When she has to give up her life, she sobs on a bed. When she’s in a terrible situation, she does initially basically pout and refuse to leave her room. But when she’s being watched by others, she tries to be strong; she cries silently when she’s following the Beast to her room. She gives him her word with her back straight and her eyes closed all grave. Like I said, you can almost see her remembering stories she’s read of brave heroes giving solemn oaths, and she’s trying to be like them.

Emma Watson didn’t bring any of that.

She had to make the character too in-control of her own emotions even when outlandish or traumatic things are happening, because her idea of a “strong woman” can’t be delighted or horrified or fazed, in general, by anything st all. She made her as distant and unrelatable as any caricature. I mean, I remember very clearly the one and only moment I felt a glimmer of “that’s Belle!” in the movie, and it’s when Belle is given the library and the Beast leaves the room, and Emma Watson gives this excited little half-shriek of joy. And it’s like…where is that in the rest of the movie?

I can even find fault with that moment, too though. Because she waits till the Beast, the gift-giver, leaves the room before she really reacts that strongly. Why? The real Belle tells the Beast how wonderful she thinks it is, breathlessly, over the moon.

Because when someone gives you a gift, if you’re a self-protective, cool-calm demeanor feminist, you don’t let them see that they have any control over your emotions—not even the ability to impress you or make you happy with a crazy gift.

But, instead, if you’re a selfless woman, who is happy to share her emotions with others especially when it brings them joy, you have no trouble showing that a crazy gift delights and impresses you. It’s part of the gratitude/

Anyway! I could go on and on. But don’t let anybody get it twisted. You do like Beauty and the Beast. You just happen to know what Beauty and the Beast really is, and why you like it.

#Thanks for the ask #beauty and the besdt #Emma Watson #the beast #Belle #batb #live action #live action beauty and the beast #Beauty and the beast

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phantomoftheorpheum · 3 months

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can i ask you to ramble about the artful dodger please?? your gifset is sooo pretty so im curious what its about!

Oh my God, have you come to the right place. There is nothing I would love to do more rn. Okay, so-

The Artful Dodger is basically (pretentious film & tv people are gonna absolutely despise this description) a post-canon/slightly canon divergent fanfiction set in the world of Dickens' Oliver Twist, following Jack Dawkins (The Artful Dodger) 15 years after the events of Oliver Twist.

So, quick recap of Oliver Twist (spoilers, obviously) for anyone who isn't familiar with that story- Oliver is this little orphan kid in England in the 18(30/40s?) << I don't believe the exact date is stated, but it was seemingly contemporary to when Dickens wrote it, which was 1837-1839. Oliver runs away from an orphanage to London and ends up meeting Jack (The Artful Dodger, AKA "Dodger" or "Dodge"), a street kid in London who takes him in. Jack is known as The Artful Dodger because he is particularly talented at pickpocketing/thieving, which is what he and the other kids he lives with do to survive. They are all "looked after" by a character called Fagin, who is basically using this child gang to support himself and his greed (listen, we can talk about Fagin's character in the show vs the books at some point if you want, but I want to keep this section brief), and Jack is the favorite because he is the best. Anyway, stuff happens, Oliver ends up having a long lost inheritance and gets to live a life of wealth, Jack is caught pickpocketing and sent to Australia (at that time a penal colony), Fagin is arrested and hanged.

*This post is relatively spoiler free for the show, but not 100%, since it's impossible to talk about without discussing character's actions, personalities, relationships, etc. However I'm doing my best to avoid any major spoiler plot points.

This show, The Artful Dodger (Hulu/Disney+) picks up 15 years later, with a few small alterations to the Oliver Twist ending. In the canon of this show, Jack was arrested for pickpocketing, but escaped prison, joined the navy, and was taught to be a surgeon. After his time in the navy, he now lives in Australia and is a doctor in a town called Port Victory, but seeing as he is also an escaped convict, he would be hanged if his past were discovered. Fagin (who dies in the original version of Oliver Twist) was spared by Oliver, and has now been sent to Port Victory as a convict. Obviously this will be a problem for Jack, who is hiding his past.

SO, with that out of the way, the premise of the show is basically this-

Jack is now a surgeon trying to live a lawful life, which is disrupted when Fagin arrives in Port Victory and threatens to expose his past and attempts to draw him back into a life of crime. Simultaneously, Jack meets Belle (totally OC for this show), the governor's daughter, who wants to be a surgeon and is willing to go to extreme lengths to get there. Unsurprisingly, Jack and Belle (who are both pretty stubborn and sassy personalities) clash in many ways, but also share common passion & interests, and thus the stage is set for the show.

So you've got two key dynamics to the show- Jack & Fagin, who have a long history (Fagin often tries to claim to be a father figure in Jack's life, which Jack rejects, as Fagin abandoned Jack when he was arrested in order to save himself) and different priorities/agendas, and Jack & Belle, who have just met, and are still trying to figure each other out. They are of very different pasts, class, mindsets/life philosophies, and this dynamic provides a lot of tension/humor/emotion (if your ask is talking about the gifset that I think, then you already know a bit about where this leads).

The show has elements of comedy, adventure, crime, romance, medical drama, etc. There are additional side plots/characters, but Belle, Jack, and Fagin are at the center of it. It's a lot of fun and only 8 eps, so I definitely recommend it to anyone who is interested! TW: blood/surgery shown on screen quite often.

Anyway, on a personal note, this show feels like it was made for me. I had this absolute obsession with The Artful Dodger character as a child; he's one of the first characters I was ever super emotionally attached to, and led to me wanting to write. For this reason, I paid to have an Artful Dodger tattoo designed while I was in college (though I have not gotten it yet, as it's part of a bigger piece that I'm still mentally workshopping) like as a reminder of why I love telling stories. So I was incredibly nervous for this show, since it was touching a character who has been fundamental to my own creative passions, so I am happy to report that it exceeded my expectations. It probably helps that I've been part of the fanfic community for a long time, so seeing "alternate" versions of characters I'm familiar with doesn't faze me too much, and I think all the actors did a great job with their performances/characters.

So if you're still here at the end of my ramblings and you think that the show sounds like a fun time, definitely check it out! I'd be willing to do a more spoilery version of one of these at some point, but I didn't want to get into heavy spoilers in a introductory post.

Thanks for asking!! <33

#the artful dodger #the artful dodger hulu #jack dawkins #belle fox #norbert fagin #ask #answered #text #long post #the artful dodger spoilers #<< but not a lot just like setting the scene (mostly stuff in the trailers)#e rambles #personal

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the-badger-mole · 3 months

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The Villain and Hero Switch...🙄

On my Maleficent salt again. If anyone ever wants help understanding my hesitance to give live action remakes a shot, look no further. I honestly did want to like the movie at first, but them just taking the story and switching the villain and non-villain roles felt like a cheap cop out.

The fairies thing really pissed me off. In the first film, they were immortal magical beings who had trouble doing things the mortal way. Did that make them imperfect guardians? Sure! But they did their best successfully for just under SIXTEEN YEARS. Then the curse caught up with them, because of course it did. It had to. There wouldn't be a story otherwise. That wasn't a good enough reason to make them criminally negligent in the live action version in order to make Maleficent look like a hero by comparison. I love the fairies from the original movie. They made mistakes, yes, but all good heroes do. AND they SAVED THE DAY!!! Phillip would've frikin died without them, and so would've Aurora!

...huh...I think I'm realizing that maybe my hesitance to give remakes, live action or otherwise, of my animated faves might have a root cause...

Anyway, I do understand that adaptations should change some things in order to justify their existence. After all, a shot for shot remake is also lazy and boring. However, a lot of the time, the remakes just make lazy choices. Like Maleficent being turned into a thinly veiled date-rape allegory and switching the hero and villain roles instead of...I don't know... giving Maleficent a deeper motive for her villainy besides being snubbed for a party invite while still letting her be the fabulous villain we all love. Or instead of focusing on Maleficent at all, they could have focused on giving Aurora more of a story. Maybe showing us how out of place she felt growing up, and what finding out who her real parents are meant to her. Also expanding on her relationship with her "aunts". Have the fairies learning to be mortal a more pivotal part of their experience. Making Maleficent a hero at the expense of villainizing King Stephen, making Queen Leah even less of a character, and Flanderizing the fairies feels...well, lazy. Aurora was one of the few Disney Princesses with two loving parents. Why remove that distinction instead of expanding on their story? They had to give up their only child in order to save her life. Not only is there conflict for them as her parents, there's conflict for them as monarchs. I think a good writer could have made that a compelling story. But no...they just had to make King Stephen evil, for...reasons...

Look, it's not even like I'm against taking the villain of an original story and turning them into the hero. I just want there to be a good reason for it. For example, I love the story of Wicked. I think making Elphaba the hero worked really well, because in the original movie (I didn't actually read the books...sorry. But in my defense, I feel like most Wicked/Wizard of Oz fans probably haven't either? We're all Judy Garland trash) In the original movie the titular Wizard is enough of a morally grey character that you could argue that he could have been a villain actually, and the Wicked Witch of the West was such a one dimensional character that you could take her in so many directions and keep her recognizable (btw, I'm not saying it's bad the 3W is one dimensional. It worked for the story, but it gave the fanfics author something to build on). Also, I feel like Wicked the novel doesn't remove all the moral greyness from Elphaba's character, and it makes her interesting. There's a story to tell there! I can dig it! It's when adaptations completely switch the role of hero and villain so completely and abruptly that I get annoyed.

What they did was less a retelling than making up a completely different story altogether. Stephan and Leah were minor characters in the original story, yes. But they could've remained loving parents to Aurora, and Maleficent could've remained the villain and still been part of a great, expanded story.

Then maybe Maleficent could've still turned into a dragon instead of giving her stupid pet bird that moment.

#maleficent #pro-maleficent the evil fairly #anti-maleficent #the stupid remake #cw: date rape #just in case #date rape #is only briefly mentioned #not graphically #switching the villain and hero doesn't automatically make the story interesting #or worth telling😒

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greekandmusicals · 9 days

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My two cents on movie musical adaptations and if they just have pro shots

I see a lot of takes that there is really no need for movie musicals and that pro shots would be the more desired option, making the movie musical adaptation tradition obsolete.

and I think the answer is complicated.

There are times when film can offer a new creative way to tell a story and can expand upon a musical, like the sound of music with the iconic shot of the mountains.

that could never happen on stage.

Now the Dear Evan Hansen movie... what's cinematic about this story? The story is designed as a stage play and works well in that format

This should have just been a proshot.

But for a more recent example, I think Tick, Tick, Boom, In the Heights, 2021 West side story are some of the best movie musicals that have so many iconic shots that add to the story's being told

And for more abstract musicals like Hadestown, this should not be a film; this belongs on stage, as does something like Hamilton.

Alright , let's move on to Wicked.

This has all the makings to be one of the biggest musical movies of all time, but that doesn't seem to be the audience reaction. I’m excited for the movie but…

I’m biased

Anyway I feel like this reception is because this film is taking more cues from blockbusters, as many people have said, while films like In the Heights did not. Which you want since a movie should have a distinct tone most people won't view a Hollywood CGI fest as the defentive wicked

I think a lot of musical animatics capture the wicked style rather then the trailer

(not saying a live action can’t work I'm just saying the Broadway animatic community seems to have captured it better then the trailer)

which lets move on to animated movie musicals

I think a lot of how Hollywood doesn't put faith into animation can be summed up by the animated version of The King, and I

This is a baffling film to me

i do not like this film

They toned it down and cut a lot of the songs down to focus on slapstick to be more in tone with a Disney film, and I love Disney films, but the musical the King and I already has a distinctive style that shouldn't have ever been changed.

cutting songs down is fine for budgetary reasons… but they cut down a lot more then that I feel

And the thing that's crazy is that King and I is not that mature of a musical, and they still felt the need to tone it down. What does that mean for more ambitious animated movie musicals? So many more mature musical stories would look great in animation.

like into the woods or even… Les mis like an animated take on that would be so much more breathtaking then the shoddy directorial work on that film

i think the into the woods film is decent but you could do a lot of nice stylistic work with an animated into the woods

And stylistically The Into the Woods movie is kinda an empty husk

This also works with something silly and campy as well I feel like animation can be used to make cheesy stuff better since seeing over-the-top musicals looks better and more natural in animation. for example cats

In the 80s or 90s, Spielberg wanted to produce an animated cat musical, and here are some of the designs that I think look very good and have a very unique style that is different from the interpretive dance style of the stage musical.

while the cats movie that exists.. just emulates that with photorealistic cgi and it doesn’t make anything new or work on it’s own terms

that’s the reason why despite cats (2019) being campy it’s also a bland film

So I feel like movie musicals are stuck in a place where people don't know what to do with them, but it really comes down to people either not wanting to embrace the musical genre, not knowing how to utilize it, or not wanting to be ambitous with the medium.

I guess the main thing I’m saying is that i think movie musicals are great

it’s all about execution

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ollieoliver910 · 13 days

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Disney's Wish Was...Well, You Probably Know By Now

Fire Emblem Engage, Danganronpa (the first one) and now Disney's Wish are products that I would put into the "let me write the script" category, (I'm not trying to intentionally step on anyone's toes, but there are already people making fan rewrites to at least Engage and Wish, but Wish is..well...)

All they really had to do to fix everything was to make Magnifico the main character and Asha the villain. There are definitely other rewrites of the script on YouTube alone that are so much better than mine, but the number one main complaint of the movie was the fact that Magnifico was designed to be an over the top bad guy when, really, he was one of the most reasonable characters in the film. The second half turns Magnifico evil for no reason other than to possibly appease fans who wanted a "classic villain" again.

But even characters like Maleficent (not the live action one), had motives that MADE SENSE while being wickedly evil. Magnifico for the first half of the movie was written to be sympathetic and everything he says towards Asha involving the wishes are reasonable. So when he does turn evil on a dime, there is literally no rhyme or reason for him to do so that fits with his character during the first half of the film. This actually makes Asha look more like a villain than Magnifico does, which is why I kind of wish (ha) that they went in that direction.

I don't remember a single Disney movie where a king has to stop a child/teenager from destroying a kingdom that isn't of their own flesh and blood (if there is one, I can't think of it right now.) It would be a fresh and original idea that twists the classic tale of stepchild/princess must stop the evil adult, usually an uncle, from causing mayhem in the story. It would be cool to see that turned completely on its head...but that's not what we got in the end.

So yeah, Wish is bad. Is it the WORST Disney movie ever made? Some critics I have watched say it is...I still think that the live action Lion King is the worst Disney movie of all time. Purely because all it did was copy and paste the source material, took out the best songs of the original film and made everything worse, CGI and all. At least there was an attempt to do something original with Wish...if the higher ups at Disney didn't step in and stop them. So that's my reasoning on that.

Anyways, review over.

Have a lovely night as always.

#disney wish #wish #disney movies #disney #asha #king magnifico #writing #scripting #movie review

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niobiumao3 · 6 months

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It's sad to me to see the animation industry being so thoroughly destroyed by the very companies who made their bread and butter with it. Disney's pivot to LA--which IMO anyways is largely due to the MCU--ia such a painful thing to behold. Yes, the shows look nice, but TBB and S7 of Clone Wars, and the Visions shorts, have all been SO phenomenal visually. And you're just not going to get the same results from an LA series, at all; the mediums are different, the approach is different, rightfully so. But there's this strange and painful desire to just toss animation aside, as if the Spiderverse films haven't been groundbreaking, as if the cinematography of TBB isn't phenomenal, as if the What If series wasn't gorgeously visualized. Like... I don't understand (except ofc I do) why they're killing an entire medium in favor of Live Action. A medium people love and will continue to for years to come, a medium with its own styles and genres.

It's like saying we should toss all physical art for digital. No, why would we do that? They're different!! We need both!

Ugh, don't mind me, I'm just wondering if TBB S3 is the last of Disney SW animation we'll see for a while. :(

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toomuchracket · 11 months

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my current brain rot ever since atpoaim is a fort date with matty!! however in my head the cute date eventually gets crashed by all the band and ends up with everyone crammed into the tiny fort.

like maybe it's at mattys house, and it's well known George just lets himself in, so he does and immediately sees the large fort in the living room and goes to investigate. he sees you and matty cuddled watching a movie in a sea of blankets and pillows so very unceremoniously flops on top of you both and the myriad of pillows. he works his way into the date somehow and is half watching the movie and half just watching you and matty being sickeningly cute and wondering if that's how him and Charli look.

about 20 mins later, there's a knock on the door, and you and matty are like??? but George just pipes up with "Oh, I invited Adam and Ross to the hangout. I hope that's okay!" and matty starts being like "this actually was a date before you barged in and-" but gets cut off by you saying its totally okay and he should go let them in. Adam feels slightly bad for barging in, but you assure him it's fine, and eventually, the 5 of you are all crammed under this fort cuddled up watching some sappy rom-com you convinced them to watch. it obviously starts with lots of complaints "ugh nooo" "whyyyy," "cmon, do we have to watch this chick flick?"" but eventually divulges into gasps at how bad the guy is and comments like "oh my god she needs to leave him" but also on the other hand they're like "well no because she fucked up too" and finally when the movie ends it is just 4 grown men trying to keep their emotions at bay after watching like enchanted or Notting hill lol

anyway sorry for rambling, domestic matty and the boys kills me off everytime

i can't believe you apologised for this omg i LOVE it!! it kinda feels like slightly older flatmate!matty and his girl to me. like say the boys are on a break from work, and matty's built this fort all cute and romantic for you guys to just chill in all cutely, and you're lazily making out in it when you hear the front door open and close and a gravelly voice go "yoohoo!"; george, bored as shit because charli's off working somewhere, coming round for some entertainment. fully creased at the image of all six foot whatever of him just flopping over you all snuggled into matty - i bet you'd be like "hi darling!" to him, genuinely happy to see him, while matty's all tetchy like "george what the FUCK" (but that's his bestie, so he lets him stay and watch, idk, lady bird (it's my fav film) or whatever with you). and the whole time, george is side-eyeing you and matty in the nicest way, thinking about himself and charli AND how you and matty used to cuddle watching films together even pre-dating but it's so lovely that you're so openly lovey-dovey in the same scenario now. and i think george had probably texted ross and adam to hang out before he came over to yours, and then when they agreed he was like "oh i'm actually at matty's" so they just rock up there; like you said, adam is guilt-stricken and very much like "oh my gosh i am so sorry for intruding i'll be on my way" - matty's like "yes that sounds like a good idea considering my girl and i were having a little DATE before you fuckers showed up" - but you're like "honestly don't worry about it. if you don't mind sitting through my movie choices you can stay". matty sighs, but is appeased when you kiss him quickly and smile sweetly at him, so it becomes the five of you all chilling on pillows in this fort watching the devil wears prada (they would fucking hate andy's boyfriend they really would). and they all complain when you say "oh my god let's watch enchanted" as you go back to the disney+ homescreen, but maybe you all share some alcohol or a joint and then they get really into the movie, gasping at the change from animation to live-action and making little comments throughout the film - i bet ross is SO bitchy about giselle's outfit for the ball lmfao. but yeah, you turn your head to look at them all as the credits roll, and try not to giggle at these huge (and matty) men either sniffling or just beaming happily at the film they just watched. and as much as you've had a nice time, matty kicks the other boys out shortly after this so he can romance you as he had planned to the whole evening (but as you hug them goodbye i think you're like "same time next week? we'll watch 27 dresses and the lizzie mcguire movie") lol <3

#mads muses #mads answers asks #matty asks #fluff asks #flatmate!matty

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hostess-of-horror · 9 days

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I'm having so many ideas and not enough energy to do or finish any of them AAAAAAAAAAAA-

Just so that I don't just wallow in my inability to get off my ass and do this shit, I'm going to type it all down!

1. The Haunted Mansion movie (done right!)

- This one is actually based on a slew of Discord convos between me and AJ (@sneklover). It was mostly just me ranting about how God awful Disney's live action remakes are getting and what I would've done if I were to make the iconic attraction a film or t.v. show.

- I have seen the original live action Haunted Mansion movie with Eddie Murphy but not the newest one, BUT MY POINT STILL STANDS! Both are literally the same thing where the story focuses more on the Foolish Mortals than the Happy Haunts and I do not like that.

- If I were to film a Haunted Mansion movie/show, I would make it an anthology horror movie. Think Tales From The Crypt or Creepshow but with Master Gracey telling the stories behind iconic characters such as the Hatbox Ghost, Constance Hatchaway, the two Dueling Ghosts in the ballroom, etc. At some point towards the end, Master Gracey would then tell his story, of how he inherited the mansion, was cursed as the Ghost Host by the mansion itself, and how he tried in vain to lift the curse.

- I remember telling my mom about my idea and, while she loved it, did say that Disney would not like it because they want to put out a more broad demographic. "They're not catering to us," she said (paraphrased). Which makes sense, I just jokingly mentioned to AJ how Disney wouldn't hire me for stuff like this lmao.

- My Haunted Mansion would be a love letter to the Gothic Horror genre and dark humor. An old Louisiana mansion that's haunted in more ways than one, its owner an unwilling slave on the brink of insanity, and all the tales of death kept within its walls. And these tales are nothing short of harrowing, as well as hilarious!

2. Vincent Price x Self-Insert Fanart

- I love this old man so fucking much I wanna kiss him I wanna dance with him I wanna cuddle with him I wanna slowly drive him into insanity so that I can see him smile lovingly at me I wanna be the harbinger of his downfall and his eternal bride aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa- 🖤🖤🖤😩🙌🥴🥴🥴

- So yeah, pretty much what it says on the tin. I was inspired by the very talented @theboarsbride for the idea and Corman's The Masque of the Red Death, starring the Handsome Devil of Horror himself Vincent Price, and wanted to make an AU.

- Masque AU where Francesca (the main character) does give in to the dark side, but of her own volition, transforming into the Red Death. The Red Death is both a Reaper and a Resurrection - a purveyor of plagues and a damsel turned demon. A Bride in Blood...

- It's basically a sort of rewrite of the original ending and now it's sorta... 🌶️spoicy🌶️ so, um.... yea. smexy monster lady x human stuffs.

- ANYWAYS...!

3. Walt Disney's The Great Mouse OC

- I've been wanting to do something with the GMD fandom for a long while now, and I think a hypothetical OC from an hypothetical sequel fanfic would be a good introduction!

- So, in a nutshell: She's a mad scientist spider who is the new secondary villain of said sequel. She has no name as of yet, but she is mute (either from an injury or is simply nonverbal), extremely passionate about her grotesque experiments, and very, very lonely. Unlike Ratigan, the Greatest Criminal Mind, she is more somewhat spontaneous, preferring the tasks of stitching her family together over anything tactic. In other words, she's the brawns while Ratigan is the brains (and brawns). Her goal in villainy is to build and destroy - to build her long lost family and to destroy all of micedom.

- While she is the one who caused the whole case, the main focus on the story is mainly the ✨tension✨ between Basil and Ratigan. In other words, opening up old wounds... by resurrecting the dead!

- Yup, Sherlock Holmes: Furry Edition is now becoming a Gothic horror story. Heavily inspired by Little Nightmares II, Jack the Ripper, and Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, the sequel is a tale of murder and madness, with a bloodcurdling case and a rivalry that won't stay dead.

- In this fanfic, I interpreted that Ratigan did die in GMD and so that he could be resurrected by my OC in the sequel! I also wanted to have Fidget resurrected but AJ doesn't like to think of her lil guy dead, so... Yeah, Ratigan is the Frankenstein's Monster and Phantom of the Opera of the plot. (POTO because I thought of the sequel's climax being set during an opera)

- Meanwhile, Basil and Dawson are having a Very Bad Time, with Basil constantly being haunted by the professor and Dawson mentally reliving his days at the regiment.

- Disney will never hire me.

#my bullshit #i just. hate being unable to DO #like just DO.#and I feel like the only thing that I can do is have lil animatics in my head and just talk about them #my mind is all over the place #the Haunted Mansion #Vincent Price #roger corman #the masque of the red death #the great mouse detective #basil x ratigan #GMD OC #oc concept

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transgirl-gaming-thoughts · 18 days

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Hey Alex 👋

What are some movies you’ve really enjoyed in your life?

My cousin actually asked me yesterday what I though the “greatest film of all time” was, and I said I am not qualified to make claims on that level… but movies I enjoy, now THAT’S something I can do!

The Mitchels vs. The Machines - I think this was a Netflix Original, but it’s an animated film produced by Sony, and has so much life and love in it! Just a fun family film about a robot apocalypse with quirky characters and very relatable family struggles, but in the end a very sweet resolution that makes me envious 🥺 10/10

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World - I’m noticing a pattern with these movie titles so far… anyways, while the comics were better overall (and I need to finish them) the Scott Pilgrim movie was pretty great! I highly recommend it to people curious about Scott Pilgrim to get essentially a crash course in Scott Pilgrim, and then read the comics if you want more.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail - While I’m ashamed to say that this is the only Monty Python media I’ve interacted with directly, The Holy Grail is such a great movie and very much my style of humor in a lot of ways XD

I have to give a shout out to the original live-action Diary of a Wimpy Kid movies, especially the second one. I have a lot of great memories of watching these with friends, and every now and then I still rewatch the second one if I want a dose of nostalgia 👌

The Hobbit Trilogy are so so so so so good, for a long time I didn’t realize there were people who disliked them compared to the book? As someone who has read and reread The Hobbit religiously over the years, the movies are pretty damn good! Some parts aren’t quite up to snuff with the book, but some parts I think do a better job of explaining the course of events than in the book (and especially Gandalf’s travels being viewed as part of the film lends itself incredibly well to preceding the Lord of the Rings trilogy). Sure the dwarf/elf romance may have been unnecessary, but it was kinda cute and has some good poetic quotes about it. All in all, some of my favorite movies right here, but especially the first one.

your name. (Kimi no na wa) - I adore Makoto Shinkai films, 5 Centimeters per Second was one of the first anime films I ever watched. your name. is just one of the greatest movies ever made, such a beautiful love story, animated brilliantly, and the funniest part is that Makoto Shinkai considers it INCOMPLETE because he had to rush the ending to meet deadlines… and it’s still a masterpiece! I recommend watching the sub version if you can, because there’s a lot of intricacies involving the Japanese language and things that gets a little lost in localization and dubbing. Honestly might be my favorite movie of all time.

The Spiderverse films by Sony are some of the most spectacular animated movies of the decade, at least! I grew up as a Spider-Man fan, and especially loved the Andrew Garfield movies, and these movies scratch that same itch, while also featuring sooo many variants of Spider-people from different comics and crossovers. Both Into and Across were fantastic, can’t wait for Beyond!

Growing up a big Star Wars nerd, I might be expected to name an original trilogy film, but actually I think Rogue One is my favorite Star Wars film ever! It’s got all the makings of a fantastic sci-fi thriller, set in the Star Wars universe, about a famous line from the original movies: “Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR…” (this might also be the only good thing Disney has done for Star Wars movies idk)

To a much lesser extent, The LEGO Movie actually holds up quite well in my mind! Always love revisiting a fun family film like that :3

There we go! Is this more than you asked for? Probably, but you get it anyway! X3 Thanks for the ask~!

#assorted gaming thoughts

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thefudge · 11 months

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big announcement to make after my first viewing: the little mermaid (2023) kinda slapped!!!!

it’s not a perfect movie, but it was so charming and full of heart, and it felt like the ppl making it actually cared about it beyond cash grabs. and halle is a FORCE of nature. she not only carried this movie, she sang it and swam it and flipped it upside down. she is MY LITTLE MERMAID ok. there’s something so striking and soft and melancholy about her, like you absolutely buy that she’s a disney princess BUT ALSO an old school mythical siren from a fairy tale. she had great chemistry with everyone, but her chemistry with eric?? totally unexpected to me. i actually liked their relationship much better here than in the original. the guy who plays eric (i’ve only seen him in the little women miniseries where he plays a very passable laurie) does a pretty good job, but it’s halle who makes the romance come alive for me.

anyway, the film also looked pretty great, so i guess they listened to ppl’s complaints when the first trailers came out. like, some sequences even impressed me visually?? not everything worked, but when it did, you kind of forgot about the cracks. i didn’t even mind melissa mccarthy as ursula, even though i was gunning for smb else. i wish they’d done more with her tho. i liked the things they teased out in her character, even a secret vulnerability (i’m thinking of the scene where she is frantically looking for a potion in order to beat ariel and you can sort of feel her unraveling), but i would’ve loved a bigger confrontation between her and triton.

going back to eric for a minute, i found the changes made to his backstory kind of fascinating. not only did they flesh him out and give him more personality, but eric is, arguably, a much bigger “fish out of water” than ariel in this movie. ariel seems to belong to his world more than he does, because he is one of the few white people on the island and his status is very hazy. i mean, he was a foundling who was discovered after a shipwreck; he is a literal offering from the ocean. it’s got me thinking all kinds of thoughts lol. in any case, i really liked his connection to ariel, how they’re both collectors/explorers, how he’s drawn to the ocean and she’s drawn to the land. their lil nerd sessions! her spelling out her name using the stars! ahhh

overall, i really enjoyed the film and i plan on seeing it a second time! (which never happens with these live actions lol)

(oh, i knew the movie was gonna win me over when they began the film with that quote about mermaid tears from hans christian himself!!)

#the little mermaid #the little mermaid 2023 #tlm live action #my thoughts

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crossovershipstournament · 9 months

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ROUND 3: SIDE 2: Jiminy Cricket (Pinocchio)/Timothy Q. Mouse (Dumbo) VS Megaman (Megaman)/Pit (Kid Icarus)

Propaganda for Jiminy Cricket/Timothy Q. Mouse:

This ask! So cute!

Also this ask~!

I swear to god, this has nothing to do with the Jimmy Timmy Power Hour thing, I came up with the ship separate from that. So like, as someone who grew up watching both movies, I was like "There are similar elements to these movies." "These two characters are kinda similar." "You know, I wonder how these two would interact, given their similar circumstances." "Yeah, they'd def bond over talks of the kids they watch over and such." "Perhaps the two would be besties." "Wait, both appeared in Dumbo's hat in the opening of The Mickey Mouse Club? Awesome!" "Hold on, maybe they could also be an interesting romantic couple." "I am writing stuff in my head and also a fic and doing art as we speak." "There are old Disney comics that have them interacting, I am on Cloud Nine right now." "This is my ship, I love them. They are both not straight. They're besties. They're trying their best." And here we are. I'd be more than happy to make art specifically for the polls if asked/contacted. Otherwise, I'd be happy to direct your attention to those old comics and stuff. And I'd be more than happy to also elaborate/talk more about 'em when asked.

#hi! my partner submitted Jimothy! please vote for them!

Cute art!

To the person who's drawn the cute chibified art of them, thank you for doing prop off gander today. I've been sick in bed all day and completely forgot.

So hi! Yes, hello. I came up with Jimothy several years ago and was the one to submit the prior propaganda to the blog. These two have been in so many scenarios in my mind, y'all have no idea. They are so small. They are both mentor figures (more or less). They, uh, small. Even outside the ship dynamic, I can imagine them being amazing friends. Did you know that prior to their Disney work, both of their original voice actors (Cliff Edwards for Jiminy, Edward Brophy for Timothy) were in a live-action film with Buster Keaton? That has nothing to do with the ship, that's just a fun fact. I would have more to say, but like I said, still sick. Please vote Jimothy.

More art!

TINY DAD SIDEKICKS

#OH THATS SUCH A CUTE SHIP ACTUALLY??? #TINY MENTORS..... AWWW..... #YEAH IM ON TEAM TINY MENTORS #VOTE JIMINY AND TIMOTHY

Uhm hi, please vote for Timothy and Jim…PLEASE!! They are literally so cute together :0) just two little dads living their best lives

Even more art!

#they are from the 40s…so old and in love Jimothy is a couple you can fit in your pocket. To be honest, I'm just glad they made it past round 1. This silly lil crossover ship I've made sure has grown over the years, huh. I'm super-glad that it's gotten so much love over the years. No matter what the outcome is, I love you guys.

#jimothy SWEEP

Propaganda for Megaman/Pit:

This ask, which includes the art used in the bracket image!

Oh my god. This one came immediately to mind. Idk how big the ship is now, but I remember like seeing it everywhere back when Super Smash Bros Ultimate was like popular on Tumblr/Twitter. I think it was originally a crackship cause both of them were in Captain N (a cartoon), but it’s like a serious thing now. Literally all it took was one interaction between them (there’s like dialogue you can get if you do some combination when you play as Pit) which is just Pit gushing about Mega Man. It’s cute. And honestly kind of iconic

#MEGAPIT ?? good for them #go back in time and tell kid me the ship he came up with on a whim would be in a tumblr bracket :'3

#megapit sweep!

#megapit nation let's pokémon go to the polls #let's give it for a wholesome and iconic crackship

#MEGAPIT NATION RISE. RISE. RISE #MEGAPIT

#MEGAPIT!!!1!

#MEGAPIT NATION RISE UP

#c'mon megapit nation #sure they may lose but let's get them some votes anyways!

#vote for the boys people!!! #let's get them as far as possible

Art Credit: Jiminy/Timothy pic from the Disney comics Megaman/Pit art by @/farraigeart

#Crossover Ships Tournament #Poll Tournament #Jiminy Cricket #Pinocchio #Timothy Q. Mouse #Dumbo #Megaman #Pit Kid Icarus #Kid Icarus #Can I just say how cute it is that Jiminy and Timothy are now up against an artificial boy and a boy who can fly?

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shadyb00ts · 11 months

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The Little Mermaid (2023) - Review

As a longtime fan of Chloe x Halle, I knew from the moment that Halle Bailey was cast as Ariel that she was the perfect choice. Of course the racists were (and still are) whining and throwing tantrums about Ariel being black, because they never believe any person of color can truly earn a role with sheer talent, but for a long time I was sure that even if this movie ended up being an absolute dumpster fire, Halle would be the saving grace of that dumpster fire. She would be the best part, hands down.

Well, I wasn't surprised to see that I was right. About her being the best part, at least, but I don't think the movie itself is a dumpster fire at all. I actually really enjoyed it, and I've been very cynical of the Disney live action remakes for a long time like most people are. I had no confidence in this film but I had the utmost confidence in Halle to shine no matter what. However, there were things about this movie that pleasantly surprised me. Some disappointments though, I'll admit.

This is gonna be a long review, as my reviews always are. Spoilers ahead. I'd recommend you read this if you've seen the movie, but if you haven't and don't care about spoilers, read on.

So for starters, I was never really a Little Mermaid stan. Of course I loved the movie as a kid because I was obsessed with mermaids in general, and the songs were undisputed classics, but I wasn't exactly a fan of the movie as I grew older. I don't dislike it, it's just... fine. It's very of its time. So because of that, I knew they were going to update and expand certain things in the remake. For better or worse.

I've already stated how much I thought Halle nailed this film. Maybe you could say that I'm biased since I was already a fan of hers anyway, but hey, this is just my honest opinion. She captured Ariel's essence so beautifully; her innocence and naivete, her curiosity and inquisitiveness, her yearning and wonder. And while yes, the CGI during the underwater scenes could be a little janky some of the time, I was mostly mesmerized by the way she moved, the way her hair moved and the iridescence of her tail. She just looked so gorgeous and adorable and got Ariel down to a science.

As for when she gets legs and goes to the surface, that's where she shines even more, because she has to act without saying a word. It was all in her expressions and mannerisms and I thought she absolutely delivered. I haven't mentioned the new songs they added yet, but they did add a new Ariel song for when she goes to the surface called "For the First Time" and I have to say that it's my favorite new addition. It's soooo delightfully musical theater and I think it has the most Little Mermaid-esque vibe to it. It fit the movie perfectly.

Back to the actors, I also thought Melissa McCarthy was the biggest surprise. I had zero confidence that she would do the role justice, but I thought she actually did a great job. She was definitely channeling Pat Carroll and some of her lines elicited chuckles out of me. And I thought her rendition of Poor Unfortunate Souls was pretty good, even though it's unfortunately missing the iconic "body language" lyric. She's not a strong vocalist but I think she did the best she could, and she was one of the highlights. Also she did the Ursula Shoulder Shimmy which I appreciated.

Jonah Hauer King as Prince Eric also did a good job I think. The remake added much-needed depth and character to Eric that was missing in the original. Another thing I appreciated was how they tried to show more parallels between Eric and Ariel. There's a scene in the movie where Ariel finds Eric's library/study, and it's shot in a way that makes it reminiscent to Ariel's grotto. They tried to give the two more things in common, and I think they succeeded in that. Plus the chemistry between Jonah and Halle was just off the charts. I rarely find straight couples adorable, but I thought they were so adorable any time they were sharing a scene.

My one minor gripe with his casting is that he's not exactly the strongest vocalist. One of the new musical numbers is an Eric song called Wild Uncharted Waters, and.... I didn't really like it. His voice kind of sounded like the lead singer of an angsty rock band from the 2000s. As soon as it started it gave me war flashbacks to Emma Watson in Beauty and the Beast, where they had to use very noticeable autotune on her voice. Granted that was much, MUCH worse, but still. I don't wanna be reminded of that travesty. The song itself is okay I think, but it could be much better if they had a stronger vocalist or a Broadway darling to play the role, to really do the song justice. But like I said, this is just a minor gripe because Eric really only gets one song, and Jonah overall did a good job.

A change that I really appreciated was, instead of Ariel getting invited to dinner at the castle, she and Eric go to a market instead. The kingdom in the remake is inspired by the Caribbean and I loved the tropical, colorful vibe of the locale. The market visit allowed Ariel to wander around and marvel at everything she doesn't understand, and it's a much cuter, more laid back way for her and Eric to spend time together. Some people were upset about the crazy chef who tries to kill Sebastian being removed, but honestly, I never thought that sequence added anything to the original. I loved what they did here.

Daveed Diggs as Sebastian... Sigh. Look, I love Daveed but I feel like he was so miscast for this. Anytime he spoke or sang, you could tell the Jamaican accent was very put on. Sure, the original actor who voiced Sebastian--Samuel E. Wright, RIP--also was putting on a Jamaican accent, but somehow it just felt more natural when he did it. His voice work as Sebastian was so iconic, and Daveed just missed the mark on this role. It just wasn't the right role for him. His version of Under the Sea was also quite underwhelming, and he did a lot of talk-singing during it. I liked the Under the Sea sequence visually, but not quite sonically.

As for Kiss the Girl, people were making such an uproar about the lyric changes but the changes were so minor. They literally only changed like, a couple of lines, and the song is still the same thematically. It's still just the animal sidekicks trying to influence Eric to kiss the girl in kiiind of a date-r*pey-ish way. They wanted to make it seem more consensual, but nothing's really changed. But yeah, I do think the original version of the song is still better regardless. Similar issue I felt about Under the Sea, it just... doesn't quite hit the mark.

Awkwafina as Scuttle was... alright. She had some funny moments, but I mean, she's just doing her regular voice. It's literally just Awkwafina as a bird. But what I really hated was.. Scuttlebutt.

Oh god, Scuttlebutt. I honestly have no idea what Lin Manuel Miranda was thinking when he wrote this? I don't know if he was smoking something really strong, cause like... Mama, this is garbage. Like, I can't even explain to you how painful to hear this song was. It's absolutely the worst and most unnecessary addition to the soundtrack. Nobody wants to hear Awkwafina, the queen of putting on blaccents, rapping. That's the last thing any of us wanna hear. It was just. So. Horrible. I've seen the movie twice in theaters now and each time I was just begging for that song to be over.

Anyway, that's the most negative thing I can say about this movie, was that damn song. Lin deserved jailtime for that one.

For the more minor characters, Javier Bardem as Triton was okay. Some people think he was horrible but I don't think he was that bad, it was fine. I still would've preferred Idris Elba as Triton but that's just my personal fancast.

Flounder was... Flounder. Yeah, I don't like his hyper-realistic design, but he was still pretty cute and 12-year-old Jacob Tremblay was just trying his best to emulate the original actor and I think he did a fine job.

Ariel's sisters were barely in it, like in the original. They did give them each unique, cute designs, but we all know that it's just to sell dolls. They appear in the beginning of the movie in a pretty awkward scene that's supposed to replace the concert from the original film. Apparently Triton and his daughters meet every time there's something called the Coral Moon? It seems to just be a family meeting of some sort. They left it so vague, they didn't even bother to explain what the Coral Moon was. I wish they had just kept the concert.

But yeah, the sisters are all named and apparently I heard each of them are supposed to have special powers? Well those powers weren't showcased in the movie at all, so we know it was just a marketing tactic. I'm sure there'll be tons of fanfics of all the sisters having adventures and whatnot. They might even make an animated series. It'd be called Ariel and Her Sisters, or Daughters of Triton.

I do think the dolls are very slay though. I'd buy the whole 7 pack.

Oh my god, I forgot to talk about Vanessa. Girl... Jessica Alexander bodied this role. Even though she was only in it for a handful of minutes, she ate up every bit of those minutes. I also really liked Vanessa's Trick from the soundtrack and thought it sounded beautiful. Do I wish it still had lyrics instead of "la-di-da's"? Sure I guess, but I honestly don't mind all that much. It's very haunting and Halle's voice is ethereal on it.

I think that's all I have to say on the movie. It's a fun time and it's bolstered by some stellar performances (particularly from Halle) and welcome changes/additions. But it's also kinda bogged down by not-always-great CGI, some clunky musical choices, and certain things cut from the original film that I thought shouldn't have been cut.

Still, I very much enjoyed this movie more than any of the other Disney remakes so far. I do agree with people's sentiments of it being the best of the bunch, but well... the bar isn't exactly high in that regard. Maybe because the previous remakes were so bad, this one just is the best because it's the only one that doesn't suck.

Whatever the case, I had enough of a great time that I went and saw it twice. I recommend you see it too before it leaves theaters.

#the little mermaid #the little mermaid 2023 #ariel #halle bailey #jonah hauer king #melissa mccarthy #ursula #prince eric #sebastian #flounder #scuttle #tlm #movie review #film #disney #live action remakes #disney live action #review #film review

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babyspacebatclone · 11 months

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Ok, just back from the live action The Little Mermaid.

And may I confidently say?

Best live-action Disney adaptation yet.

True, a low bar to clear, but this honestly felt like a movie and a love story, and not just a cash grab.

Every single changed scene had me smiling. Eric (Jonah Hauer-King) was amazing, and Halle Bailey truly is Ariel, I want her version to become the defacto in the Disney Princesses line because she feels sweet and clever and brave above and beyond the animated version.

(No offense to Jodi Benson, I love her, but the animated version is what it was and the new Ariel is just given more room to breathe.)

I think, comparing, my child self would love the animated spectacle more…

But my adult self loves the tighter, more in depth story of the live action more.

It feels like the best kind of fan fiction, one where someone who loves the characters asks “How were they feeling here? How can I expand this?”

And gives us those glimpses.

Not perfect, but definitely enough for me to fan girl.

Speaking of which… Spoilers below the cut.

Right from the opening scene, you see this movie is taking itself and the responsibility of the story seriously. I love the development of Eric, his camaraderie with the sailors while also being a good mix of level headed (don’t just harpoon mermaids) with reckless insanity (dude, you’re a prince, please don’t laugh while dangling by one arm over open water. ah, well, i love you anyway).

I can feel how much the film pulls back the special effects budget, especially making the introduction of Triton’s daughters basically a business meeting instead of the grand performance, but the filmmakers were smart enough to make the change work. I like the idea of each daughter being “manager” of a specific sea under daddy’s “CEO,” and it was a great excuse to give diversity to each sister.

Plus, I loved their banter/interaction while cleaning the shipwreck, they felt natural and I wish we could have had more time with them.

Speaking of natural!

As a writer I was listening to the exposition, and in my opinion it was exceptionally well done, especially for the amount they crammed into the beginning. Some of it was on-the-nose, but that was restricted to Grimsby, Sebastian, and Ursula, and felt character appropriate in each context.

There was an eye for why the character is saying something - “Am I supposed to tell the Queen her son died, and on his birthday?”; “A shipwreck brought you to us, and now a shipwreck almost took you away, I can’t stand this anymore!”

I didn’t fee like making Eric an adopted orphan of the royal family was necessary, but I loved both Jonah’s and Noma Dumezweni’s performances enough that I accept the filmmakers wanting to justify things and they do tie it in to Eric’s expanded character.

And that is 👌👌👌 he’s so sweet and adorkable and they manage to make his longing to see the world beyond his island mesh with Ariel’s longing for the surface world without it feeling forced.

You see them shyly come together over their shared feelings of isolation and longing for something they’ve only been able to glimpse, not experience.

youtube

Turning the ideas that Ursula is King Triton’s sister and Ariel’s mother was killed by humans into not just canon, but pertinent plot points, was excellent.

I wish we could have known more about her mother, but can I say I’m glad it was never revealed Ursula was actually responsible? I suspected that when it was clear Ursula had been banished around the time of the death, but it works so much better than it really was just one human that traumatized King Triton, and him having to overcome his hatred of humanity as a whole despite his lose.

Ursula pulling out the “I’m your Aunt, ‘Daddy’ has hurt me so much by refusing to understand me, too” was genius.

It especially helped with the fact that Ariel was going to refuse to sacrifice her entire life (realism!!) only to give in because of her anger in a moment of spite towards her father (realism!!!), especially with seeing their relationship and knowing that Ariel’s fear of being enclosed under her father’s constant watch was probably accurate.

As a song, “For the First Time” isn’t particularly special.

Including Ariel actively doubting her decision to come to land? Brilliant.

youtube

The entire day out and “Kiss the Girl” sequence is perfection, fight me.

Grimsby being an active shipper on deck?? 😍

I personally prefer Eric being the one to steer the ship in the climatic fight, but the detail of Ariel steering it because she’d witnessed him trying to save the ship in the beginning was nice symmetry.

The animal companions were done very well in my opinion: Scuttle was better handled than in the animation to me, Sebastian was perfect and they did a great job humanizing his design with his eyes compared to previous outings, and Flounder was - there. With Max.

Almost feel you could have cut the last two out and lost nothing except babbling to Triton at the beginning, Eric coulda saved the shipboy at the beginning…

(And yes Flounder’s “realistic” design does not improve in context, fortunately he’s on screen less than the animated characters with charisma)

I love the expansion of the prejudices on both sides; I wish it had been better explored at the end, but Queen Selina’s speech to her son about how his feelings for Ariel despite her being a “sea creature” (her initial fearful reaction) was beautiful.

Brain’s trickling down, it was an early showing, but you get the point.

It’s well worth watching the movie, and I’m up for rambling if anyone else is! 😊

#the little mermaid 2023 #the little mermaid spoilers #anaylsis #disney #Youtube

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