#so. the abomination that is FOURTH WING

[sp4ceboo]

rant but im a bit scared im going to get attacked

[morganstrive]

Pocket-size dragon companions to accompany you on your journey!

[v1olent-l1ttle-th1ng]

Weekly Empyrean/Onyx Storm Theories Week 5: Dragons

To preface, this is definitely a little unhinged. I’ve had this thought since reading Fourth Wing for the first time, and actually recently discussed it with someone else, BUT what if the dragons are actually bad???

Hear me out. We learn from Felix in Iron Flame, that dragons use the power of the earth (just like venin do), to help power their magic. If drawing from the Earth makes venin venin, how come dragons can do it? We also learn in Chapter one of Fourth Wing, from the Fables of the Barren, that you can’t draw power from the Earth, WITHOUT being bonded to a dragon. The Fables of the Barren is also mentioned to “demonized dragons”. If everything else in the book is true, why would that be any different? Jack also says in Onyx Storm, “You conveniently see me as the villain, but you’re bonded to two”.

We learn when we meet the irids that their “breed is born for peace, not violence like the others.” They tell Andarna, “You were left behind as the criterion. The measurement of their growth, their ability to choose tranquility and harmony with all living things. We’d hoped you would return to tell us the humans had evolved, and that they had blossomed under the wardstones and NO LONGER USED MAGIC AS A WEAPON, but instead you have shown us the opposite.” Then they say, “and dragonkind has not learned their lesson either.” What lesson are they taking about? Are they using magic as a weapon? The irids continue, and we learn, “You have weaponized your magic. You’ve become the very thing we abhor, the HORROR WE FLED FROM.” If it’s true that the irids left 600 years ago, and 600 years ago was when the first battle with General Daramor and the venin took place, then is this the horror they fled from? Did the dragons (mainly the emperyean) do something bad? You’ve become the horror we fled from. Interesting. The irids continue talking and Andarna asks, “Do you not care that people will die?” To which the irids respond, “Perhaps they should. Perhaps the corrupted ones should devour the land in its entirety. Only when they’re faced with starvation will they confront the evil they’ve become. Either they’ll die off and the land will regenerate, or they’ll confront the abominations they’ve become and change.” What if “the corrupted ones” in this scenario aren’t the venin, but the Empyrean dragons. The irids say that “their offspring could evolve, perhaps”, as an answer to how they’ll change. Then, Andanra asks “is that the dark wielder’s cure, to evolve?” To which the irids respond, “there is no cure.” SO, when the irids say that “they’ll confront the abominations they’ve become and change” but then go ahead and say “there is no cure (for the dark wielders)”, what if they’re talking about the DRAGONS changing, since the dark wielders can’t evolve. I know that’s a whole ton of info, but I think it makes sense. The whole dragons relying on Earth magic, while venin turn evil doing the same thing, has never sat quite right with me. Why is it ok for dragons to do it, but not people???

ALSO, at the very end of Onyx Storm when we find out Panchek is the one who’s been helping the venin, Berwyn stabs his dragon with an alloy hilted dagger. Xaden is shocked and thinks “Berwyn just killed a dragon with a dagger. How the fuck is that possible?” Maybe because the dragons steal the magic from the ground just like the venin, and can therefore be killed in the same way.

To summarize, I think all the dragons initially drew power from the sky. Something happened in the venin war, which caused them to drain from the earth instead, prompting the irid’s to leave due to them disagreeing. Thus giving the dragons and the venin the same power source, and similar qualities.

For example:

-They are completely powerless on the isles, because the land has no magic, whereas the irids are just fine. Same as how they are completely powerless on land that has already been drained, just like the venin.

-They can be killed by alloy daggers, just like the venin.

-Andarna’s fire is the only dragon fire able to scorch the venin, because it comes from a DIFFERENT source than what’s powering them.

-The Irid’s also say “dragonkind has not learned their lesson, either.” Because they’re obviously still using the WRONG magic source.

Some more thoughts that I don’t really know what to do with but also support this theory:

-When they fly to the isles for the first time, and Tairn starts losing altitude, he tells Violet “We draw on magic for strength. I hadn’t realized how dependent we truly are.” Interesting.

-When they’re on the isles, Tairn tells Violet “Andarna shows no sign of trouble”, supporting the ‘drawing from the sky theory’ and then says “I am cut off from my source of power and strength.” Again, cuz it’s coming from the ground.

-In Onyx Storm, when quest squad is resting in Zehyllna before leaving the next morning with Trager and Sila’s bodies, Violet is thinking about how they haven’t found the irids, how Melgren will be furious and how they “Could lose the war to the dark wielders.” Tairn replies, “At least we’re already in with the enemy.” At the time, we’re assuming he’s talking about Xaden, but Tairn is groggy from sleep here and maybe let something accidentally slip?

-When Violet sees the Irid’s for the first time, she tells us “They’re all feathertails” So maybe the tail is what does it? A feathertail doesn’t mean they’re juvenile necessarily, it just means they haven’t channeled from the ground? And they only channel from the sky? That’s why the Irid’s ask her “What have you done to your tail” and “Tell us what they’ve done to you” and are upset at how her tail has been changed. “You have weaponized your magic, even your tail,” is what they tell her.

-In Iron Flame, Tairn tells Violet, “if I could accurately detect wyvern, we wouldn’t be in this position”. Then, later in the book, Andarna tells Violet, “They smell of stolen magic” when she asks if Andarna scents wyvern. Is she the only one who can sense them because her source of magic is different?

Anyways, I don’t think the dragons as a whole are evil necessarily, but I do think there’s more to the story than ‘the venin are the bad guys and the dragons are the good guys.’ Do with that what you will!

[spiritgriffon]

I've spent the last week becoming increasingly more and more convinced that Zack Fair is actually some eldritch abomination that crawled out of the lifestream and chose to be born in a human body bc he was lonely and wanted to make friends The farther I get into CCR the more Really Weird Shit that I didn't remember from my first playthough I find and the more retroactively sus some of his old lore seems. I'm just coming up to meeting Cloud and my list already has like 6 things on it

(I'm gonna make a whole long post when I beat the game but my list so far: the training room scene with Hojo where he scares the shit out of those lab techs, the way the DMV works + Angeal's line about Zack's lack of focus being the thing holding him back from using his true strength, the ending of Remake + that twitter post we just got about Zack in Rebirth, The time Zack breaks the fourth wall and scolds the player??!?!, a little bit about his scene in Maiden + how it ties into AC, the fact that his reaction to his friends growing monster bits (which is in universe horrifying even though we as viewers are going ohhh pretty wings) was "those wings... I want them too" and that Before Crisis shows that he can communicate with Guard Hounds (which for years we've been going "oh so he speaks dog lol" but I'm starting to wonder if he might speak monster. not that speaking dog isn't weird either!!!!), how his reaction to Genesis chucking a summon at him and running over and over is to get Really Genuinely Angry because... summons don't like to be treated like that??? and ofc, his scene at the end of ACC where he offers to come back to life??? like he can just Do That??? The whole plot of VII and AC was about what is supposedly the single strongest lifeform on the planet struggling to piece a body back together he can use over YEARS- what do you mean you can just come back and help Cloud fight what do you mean by that what the fuck is Zack Fair)

[olderthannetfic]

I can't defend YA/NA on its (dubious) merits, but the reason why so much of it is so, so bad is because the writers are pushed to professionalize too young, produce too fast relative to their developing skill level, and essentially have a side-gig as book influencers. The (declining) industry mindset doesn't promote quality product, and a lot of the hits are inorganic (Lightlark anyone?). Most adult "dark romance," progression fantasy, and litRPG is bad too, but it's quietly consumed by its intended readership rather than screeched about on booktok, so you don't hear about it enough to get annoyed. Something like litRPG isn't ever going mainstream in traditional publishing, while YA/NA lives there almost exclusively and is commercial enough to displace the books you actually like in brick-and-mortar stores. Another thing that works against it is the self-serving sanctimony of the whole "YA has more diversity than adult fiction" racket (no, what it has is more diversity box-checking as a branding strategy). Then you have the toxic social media culture, where you can see authors and agents behaving like teens, which makes the whole thing look unserious (though thankfully more authors are opting for updates-only accounts now). My ultimate point is don't blame the authors for the bad books, blame the industry. (Well, you can probably blame however wrote Fourth Wing because that book is a fully matured literary abomination lol).

--

[ladygreytea]

i didn't manage to read as much of fourth wing as i have powerless but fourth wing is just abominable. it also has a silver haired protagonist and she's called violet and she has some unspecified chronic illness so she hasn't got a lot of physical strength and is in pain much of the time. the book does the ember in the ashes thing of writing a war college where for some fucking reason half the students die before graduation and are borderline encouraged to kill each other which i don't think is how you build an army. violet obviously is not fit for this war college and she's a bit of a nerd so she's meant to go to uni and do something academic idk then at the last moment her mum, head of the war college?, decides she should go to war college. everyone seems to know this is a death sentence and protests on her behalf. violet protests for 3 seconds then the author remembers how completely nonsensical this idea is and violet changes her mind and wants to go to war college. there are dragons obviously it's a dragon book and they have to do some challenges then maybe if they're lucky they Bond with a dragon. violet is the first person in history to bond with Two Dragons. she's also falling in love with some guy who killed her brother or something idfk. i'll sit down and read the rest eventually but it's arduous.

[shipmistress9]

The Betrayed God

Fandom: Fourth Wing -- The Empyrean

(No spoilers for IF)

Pairing: Violet/Xaden--Riorgail, Violet/Malek--Mallet, Malek and his Bride

Rating: T

Summary:

The legends talk about three brothers and about one of them betraying them all. But that is only half of the story. The darker half is yet to be told. Setup for a (possible) story in which Xaden is Malek trapped in a human body and Violet his lost bride.

(AO3)

AN: This originates from a crack theory formed in a group chat, about Violet being Malek's bride and-- to keep our OTP--about Xaden being Malek in human form. So, of course, my mind started spinning, and this is what came out. The dark legend that might, eventually, lead to a full story.

. o O o .

The legends say that defeating the armies of the Barrens came at the highest of all prices. It cost the winners everything.

But what was this price they paid? Why do none of the ancient documents talk about it? And who paid this highest of prices? 

Come. Come here. Come here and sit down with me. Let me tell you what happened, the tragic story of betrayal, of loss, of heartbreak, and of a debt we humans won’t ever be able to repay.

Let me tell you the story of Malek, God of Death, and of the forgotten Goddess of Life that once stood by his side. 

You’ve heard the legend of the three brothers, of how two of them rose to power and how the third turned to the forbidden gift. Of how they managed to defeat him, in the end. What those stories never talk about, however, is the deal the oldest brother was willing to strike in order to win. For he was the one truly hungering for power beyond anything else, and in his greed, he stopped at nothing. With no regards for the lives it cost, he ordered his most powerful wielders to forge a device that, upon activation, would cleanse the land of all dark abominations, a miracle, their salvation. 

But magic likes all things in balance. And it is not the wielder who determines the price. 

Unwilling to pay the price that would be asked, the eldest brother came up with a cunning plan, a plan so audacious that no historian dared to write it down. They said he wielded the powers of the sky. But what are the powers of the sky if not the Gods themselves? And he wielded them perfectly…

With feigned subservience, he lured them in, offering devotion and sacrifices for centuries to come. And vain as the Gods were, they accepted his promises. They fought at his side against the dark horde, glorious and awful as only Gods can be.

It was then, after many battles fought side by side, that the cunning eldest brother approached Malek with yet another proposal. He offered him a powerful talisman, the cruel device, to enhance his mighty strikes. The device that would put an end to their most hated foes—at the cost of their most beloved treasure. 

The Lord of Death, unaware of the treachery, went to battle and wiped all dark wielders off the face of the earth in one powerful strike. 

Grateful and full of awe, the humans praised the God, their saviour, promising to burn all that belonged to the dead in his name, and the oldest brother, who devoted his life to this cause, was made king to rule over all of mankind.

This is where the legends end—but it is not the end of this story. For there was still the price to pay for their victory, and when Malek returned to his Palace, glowing and victorious. .. he found that something was missing. The price that had to be paid, the balance magic crave. 

His most beloved treasure, his beautiful bride, was gone. 

In order to destroy the darkest powers, magic had taken the brightest light, the Goddess of Life, away.

Blind with grief and fury, Malek rioted and screamed, but there was no way to make the spell undone. His bride was lost, reduced to nothing but a mortal soul. Damned to endlessly wander the lands of the humans, she would never be commended to him, never to return to his side. 

The God of Death, lost in his grief, pleaded with the magic, his Queen, even with fate herself, and they offered him a deal. If he wanted his beloved back, then he had to join her. He had to become a mortal soul as well. And only should they find each other despite their lost memories, only should she regain all of her lost powers despite not knowing what she’d lost, only if they accomplished the deed she was sacrificed for without treachery… only then would Malek and his Bride be able to return to their Palace.

It was a fool’s bargain. A human’s life was difficult, their lands wide. The chances of them ever fulfilling the set terms all but nonexistent. But Malek agreed anyway. For all eternity was worthless if She was not by his side. He would bring her back. Even if it took him centuries to find her.

[north-blue-hearts]

Family Practice

CisFem Reader x Trafalgar Law

CW: sex, language, violence

Summary: Modern Mafia-coded AU starts in last semester of College

Chapter 2: Graded

A few weeks later you’re in the library again and Law comes to sit with you. He sets a cup of coffee down in front of you and one for himself. Before he sits down across from you, he pulls out his wallet and hands over the agreed upon money.

Your face lights up as you take it. “New high score?”

There’s a hint of a smile. “Yeah. I suppose I owe you an apology.”

“Bah,” you wave it off, tucking the money away. “You’ve paid the price for doubting my genius.” You grin. “So, your grades were already high, did you ace it?”

He shook his head. “99.3%. Highest score on the midterms that professor has seen in thirty years.”

“Hells, you missed…” You did the math in your head. “A fraction of a question?”

“Yeah, most of the test was multiple parts per question.” He explains.

“Wow, that’s impressive Pre-Med.” You admit, teasing him with the old nickname. “It feels weird, as a lazy linguistics major to say so, but I’m proud of you.”

“Am I going to be Pre-Med until I have my PhD in my hands, or?”

You grin. “Maybe. Ah, so anyway, I won, and you’ve only paid the processing fee. Where’s the rest?”

Law sighs. “Your place. Sachi and Penguin are hosting a study group tonight.”

“Fair enough. Are you going to bring dinner with you, or am I handling it?”

“Are you going to order abominations again?”

“Abomin… I’m not the emo reject that dislikes bread. Bread! Of all things!” Your face reflects your continued disbelief. “I could get it if you were allergic, but to just dislike it as a matter of opinion is,” you could feel Law’s eye twitching. “Unique. Touchy subject?”

“A little.”

You put your hands up. “My apologies then.”

“Back to the question.”

You smile, “Pad Thai? Oh, ready to brave my cooking?” You ask excitedly.

It took a couple days for you and Law to adjust to one another, but it’s been going smooth since. He’s a man of few words until he’s really interested in something, or passionate about it. A little stunted in the emotional development department, but not so much that you couldn’t work out what was going on in his head. Reading people was something of a survival skill for you, so you were good at it.

His roommates, Sachi and Penguin are studying marine biology, and a fourth friend of theirs Bepo is double majoring in Zoology and wildlife conservation. Because of his schedule, you’ve only met Bepo once so far, but he was the biggest, cuddliest, most polite pile of walking warmth you’d ever met. He had an unforgivably cute collection of polar bear hats and scarves too.

In making one accidental friend you ended up making four friends, and it was nice to know you actually could. Making friends in middle school and high school had been easy - being stuck in classes with the same people over and over would help anyone make friends. College was a different beast.

“Pad Thai is fine.” Law states, trying to hide the look of horror that slipped across his features.

You sigh, but you can’t argue. You’d have to beg some cooking lessons from Sanji the next time you were back home. You weren’t a terrible cook, but you weren’t a good cook, and unfortunately you had been so nervous about cooking for your new friend that you had managed to set pasta on fire. The night had ended in Law administering first aid to some burns on your arm, and the two of you eating chicken wings.

The rest of the day goes easily and the two of you head over to your apartment. You had considered staying in the dorms, but the apartment you found was one of Shanks’ properties, and he was good friends with Luffy. You got offered a deal that would’ve been financially irresponsible to turn down. Shanks, like Big Mom and Pops, was head of his own organization. He was a kind of a spiritual successor to a long-passed rival of Pops’, and Shanks was also one of the biggest reasons Luffy became who he was.

Out of everyone, Shanks actually scared you the most. He was too jovial and easy going, and you couldn’t read him like you could most people. His success coupled with his general attitude had you convinced there was a demon behind those eyes. Really good-looking, wildly disarming eyes, if you were being honest, but that just made him scarier in your opinion. Not that you feared him, but you had zero interest in becoming friends or associates with him.

Let someone else wrangle that beast.

“Welcome to my swanky bachelor pad.” You said jokingly, opening the door and letting Law step in first.

He got his foot just past the threshold and his hands grabbed onto the doorframe. “(Y/N)-ya… did you do this yourself?”

“Gods no,” you said, trying not to laugh. “I lost a bet with my brother, and I think he brought the whole family down to redecorate for me over the weekend.”

Inside your usually spartan space, there were velvet sheets and blankets hanging from the walls and ceiling. Various colors of light bulbs created a slightly rainbow effect, but they weren’t so bright in hue as to clash. A beaded curtain was hung just inside the entrance, and you were glad that you had turned off the “ambiance enhancing music” this morning before you had left.

Thankfully your kitchen and bathroom had been spared, but your bedroom looked like a red-light special and you were absolutely not letting anyone in there right now.

“Please get in there before someone passes by and thinks I’ve converted my room to a hookah bar.” You urged, and Law stepped inside reluctantly.

“How long is it staying like this?” Law’s distaste for the new look was obvious.

“…until finals.” You admit with a defeated sigh.

“What was the bet?”

You made a very displeased noise. There was silence from Law as the two of you made your way to the living room.

“… (Y/N)-ya?”

“Eh?”

“What was your midterm grade?”

You made the same displeased noise and Law wheeled around practically glaring at you.

“Don’t tell me you failed?” The disbelief in his voice was comforting. In the last few weeks you had at least proven your capacity to be on par with him in terms of book-smarts.

“Hardly!” You scoffed, but you were having a hard time looking at him. “Look, I passed. I passed with a respectable grade and everything.”

“Then what was the bet?” Law had his hand up to his temple, trying to stave off a headache.

“If I got anything less than an A, Marco - my, er, brother, was allowed to decorate my place as he saw fit.” You explained.

“What did you get?”

“Eighty-seven point nine percent.” You said in a devastated tone.

“That is respectable.” Law agreed. “What happened?”

“I refuse to answer.” You said, setting down your stuff and grabbing the menu off the fridge. “Tell me what you want.”

“Refuse to answer on what grounds?” Law pressed. You had both agreed to be at least mostly open about things, with a few caveats. Grades weren’t one of those caveats.

“There’s no way for me to answer that without giving it away, so I’ll just admit that I was completely flawless on the Latin portion of the test and maybe a little lacking in a couple other areas.” You say, leveling him with an aggravated glare.

Law put it together quickly and returned your grumpy expression. You weren’t surprised, you’d been helping him with his Latin-rooted medical terms a lot. “Don’t do that for the finals.”

“I won’t, I won’t, now dammit, I’m hungry - what do you want?”

After you got the food order in and made some tea you turned to Law and raised an eyebrow expectantly.

“Alright, what do you want to know?” Law sighed. Lost bets came in two parts - monetary loss and the right to ask questions about the other.

“You mentioned an adoptive dad.” You say. “You can tell me about him or tell me why you were adopted. I’ll even toss in something about myself to help, since either option is pretty personal. I, technically, am adopted. My, uh, ‘Father’ is alive, but I’ve been raised by Pops since I was six.”

“I don’t mind answering both,” Law says. “Especially since you seem to have sacrificed your precious apartment in order to win our bet.”

Law looks more at his teacup than you, but his tone is even as he speaks, and there’s no sign of distress. “My parents got sick when I was middle school, and neither of them made it through my time in high school,” He explains softly. “They were both doctors, and I had always wanted to be one as well, but the whole… thing… really nailed my resolve into place. A friend of my father’s adopted me when it became clear that they weren’t going to survive, and so, Rosinante’s my adopted dad.”

You were quiet for a long time, not really sure what to say. Law took a couple sips of tea before speaking again.

“Too much?” He asks. There’s a tone of resignation in his voice, as though he feels like he messed up.

You shake your head. “Nah, I just don’t know what to say. It doesn’t matter how long ago it was, that sucks. It’s complicated too.”

“How so?” He asks, looking visibly confused. “I mean, it’s heavy, but it’s cut and dry.”

“Ah, er… it creates complicated thoughts in me.” You clarify.

“Your dad’s alive, but your mom’s not.” Law says. You hadn’t laid it out for him, but given what you’ve said before it makes sense he could sort it out. “I don’t want to make assumptions, but the fact that he’s alive and you’re living with a different dad means your situation is complicated. But, complicated or straightforward, it all does, uh, ‘suck’.”

“Yeah, loss is hard no matter the circumstances.” You agree. “I’m sorry about your folks.”

“Thanks.” Law smiles a little sadly. “You would’ve liked my mom. She was weird about words too.”

You were getting ready to be indignant about his joke when there was a knock at the door. Food had arrived and the conversation was on hold until the two of you sorted everything out. With some food to distract you, and ease some encroaching hangry-ness, you let the jab from earlier go and decided to switch gears.

“So, you said your dad was going to be away on business during winter break,” you said after a few bites of food. “Why don’t you come to Grandline with me?”

“It sounds exhausting just listening to you suggest it.” He admitted flatly.

“All the Charlotte kids are staying on campus.”

“How would you even know that?” Law looks more annoyed by the mention of the Charlotte family than he does impressed by your knowledge.

“Nutmeg and her friends aren’t exactly subtle.” You point out. “And they get on my nerves, so it’s hard to block them out.”

“How’s come?” There’s a tone of actual curiosity, and not just polite conversation in his voice.

You learned quickly that Trafalgar and the wall he had built up around himself were both rock solid. You weren’t surprised an aspiring doctor was practiced at keeping in shape, but you smacked him on the back once when you were kidding around. He’d turn an impressive red when you’d lifted his shirt up without thinking – you weren’t entirely convinced he was made of flesh at that point.

It had taken a lot of apologizing, and a couple rounds of free food to smooth things over. You’d admitted to having grown up around a lot of boys, half of which barely wore shirts unless the occasion demanded it. That had also been when you’d made the agreement about bets and getting to know one another.

“I can forgive the ‘Mrs. Degree’ thing, to an extent, but ‘Meg’s a smart girl. I haven’t asked her what her grades are or anything, but her answers in class, and even her questions, are genius. I’m talking ‘This will help the class understand better if I ask’ kinds of genius.” You explain, your shoulders dropping. “To think that her mind is preoccupied with trying to find love in a few short years, just so her mom doesn’t match her up with some troglodyte. Instead, she could be focusing on becoming whatever she wanted to be.”

“… They get on your nerves because you feel bad for them.” It wasn’t really a question, but it was barely a statement.

“Mm.” You admit, feeling your ears and face start to go pink. “S’weird, isn’t it?”

“Compared to the rest of you, hardly.” Law answers, his usual resting scowl softening a little.

You pause in eating for a moment and start laughing. “I can’t tell if you complimented me or devastated me.”

He eats quietly for a moment, and then lets out a small sigh. “If I don’t agree to go to Grandline City with you over break you’re going to hound me for the next week about it.”

“Next two weeks.” You correct him.

“Two weeks would put us a week into break.” He points out.

“Ah-yup.”

You can almost see his eye twitch.

“I’m being blackmailed.”

“By definition, yes.” You agree with a smile.

You watched the internal conflict tear through him. Trafalgar Law was a mostly subtle person. All his emotions hit the wall around him and barely made a crack on his face. You didn’t think he was truly an emotionless person – trauma and loss just made him wary about connecting with more people. After a couple weeks, though, you were learning what some of the small facial changes meant.

“… I don’t want to meet your family.” He said finally.

“I had no plans to subject you to that.” You promise him, taking out your phone and sending some texts while you’re thinking about it. “I’ll get Robin to reserve a couple rooms, and I’ll let my brothers know that I’ll be busy. Er, oh, I guess there is one thing…”

“What is it?” He was doing his best not to growl the words.

“Pop’s is going to have a big Christmas party a few days before the actual holiday. I’m not asking you to attend, I’m just saying you’ll be on your own for a few hours.” You admit a bit sheepishly.

Law sighs. “You’re dragging me to your hometown, but you don’t have to make sure I’m entertained the entire time, (y/n)-ya. I’ll survive.”

[scriptfree]

I recently started reading "Harry Potter and the Boiling Isles" on AO3 and this story has a disgustingly tight grip on me. I know that the author made some designs for the characters already but I felt like I should just share what I had in mind when I first started reading. Especially since the whole entire document became CORRUPTED somehow and now none of the unrendered color versions and sketches are all lost and can never be recovered, which hurt my soul much more than I expected it to.

I first started designing it and put a stupid amount of worry into whether Harry should have a jacket or not in Season 1, which is currently taking place. I'll get into why I'm divided between the jacket/no jacket look later but Ron was particularly hard. I couldn't decide if I should go the book/description loyal route or Rupert Grint inspired route because, honestly, I never read the books so I will always imagine Ron as the average height guy that Rupert Grin has encompassed for the kid. I decided to just go with what inspired me more, which isn't so book accurate but was more fun to draw. And drawing it in the Owl House style was an interesting exercise in learning line weight and simplification of design. Though I'm pretty sure these would still need further simplifying, specifically for the belts and collar textures.

Mild spoilers and speculations for later in the story, I guess?

I'm sure that it's not much of a spoiler as it is implied that Ron will be studying abomination magic and that Harry and Lilith will reconcile at some point, so I made my post-show future designs reflect that. If Luz is 18 when the epilogue takes place, Harry and Ron would be like 15 or something so they would be like fourth or fifth years. Harry is wearing Lilith's grudgby jacket--like how Luz wears Eda's--and continues attending Hogwarts (don't ask me how with the whole Wizarding War situation, just let me be happy) and Ron decided to stay in the Boiling Isles to apprentice under Alador or Darius, even if it might seem a bit out of character. But, eh, Weasley's are ambitious folk and to become the first Weasley to master Abomination magic as a human would totally outdo all his other siblings at the dinner table and parties.

I mentioned being torn on taking away Harry's jacket in his season 1 design because I imagine Lilith would come clean about being Harry's mom at some point during or before Season 2, which is where I would imagine Harry would end up wearing her grugby jacket. And I wanted it to feel significantly different from his season 1 design because him wearing it would be a MAJOR development in the story and his relationship with Lilith. I also added more to Lilith's jacket because it felt a little bare compared to Eda's, but I will post that later when I redraw the designs.

I had a season 2 lineup cleaned up and colored too but I never saved it out so that version is lost forever where Ron wore some edgy ripped vest with abomination goo or whatever but I haven't finalized his design because it's always come as an afterthought and the kid deserves better than that.

Anyways, I imagine that by the end of the series, if the author is kind, there will be not much more physical scarring on the poor children after all their inevitable trauma. Harry will get a palisman at some point, which I headcannon to be a peryton (a winged deer with antlers) that he names Prongs (I dunno how he gets the name, I dunno if he knows his dad's nickname yet). Prongs came from the Forest of the Forgotten who used to belong to a jerkass grudgby player who threw them out after one of their wings broke off, which the flyer found unacceptable because it would "affect their speed". Prongs became attracted to Harry's passion for Quidditch and missed competing in a sport, so they bonded with Harry through that. I decided that Ron's will be a capricorn, because I imagine the ram would be a good representation of how stubborn he is but the tail end would sorta represent his almost contradictory flexibility under pressure. I haven't finalized the design and am still on the edge of changing it because drawing a capricorn is SO FUCKING HARD, so the little palisman is not present in the lineup.

None of this should be taken as actual spoilers for the story as I am literally making fanart of a fanfiction, so none of this is author approved.

But if they end up liking it, I would not mind them working with these ideas which would be a huge honor.

[thepolyamorouspolymath]

The story of how the fourth estate was broken...

Go back to the 50s. People relied on radio far more than TV. Observe non music radio programming from then on... notice that the popularity of radio trended older and more conservative. One big area of this was religious radio!

Then in the 1980s the right wing and the apocalypse cult nut jobs merged into one, and right wing radio emerged.

Now, it is important to recognize that while right wing radio has always been a boil on the ass of humanity and Reagan was a racist, elitist, imperialist, homophobic shithead, they SOUNDED more sane. As a group, overall, the GOP was truly more sane -- they understood that governance requires compromise and civility with those you need to work with, and actual bipartisanship.

So in the 90s when the first real stars of right wing radio started to emerge with the rise of Rush Limbaugh, there was a certain degree of... good faith extended. That we were all reading the same book even if on wildly different pages.

Then came Fox News, the brainchild of Roger Ailes, who was an abomination in the eyes of both God and man, but also a damn fine spin artist (you can be good at your job and also evil. Interestingly, this is especially true of politicians, propagandists, and spin doctors) with a built in stable of starting hosts who had followings from being cohosts or pundits on CNN or network weekly shows or from right wing radio, all of them with veneers of respectability by virtue of being known factors who didn't seem like full on Nazis. (Anybody remember where Tucker Carlson was in the early 2000s? He was a cohost on a highly rated CNN show in a good time slot, Crossfire, where he and Paul Begalia would yell partisan positions at each other until Jon Stewart publicly shamed them so badly they were canceled within a week -- he was a pissy standard Republican, not anything extreme. He was annoying and wrong all the time, but no one would have gone oh that man will be instrumental in resurrecting the Nazi party in a little over a decade.)

From there they went a little further down the rabbit hole with each passing year with greater and greater bigotry and paranoia.

By the time the left realized the need a response rather than just relying on truth winning out, they had lost radio and trying to get a grip in TV was difficult because they didn't have any established personalities.

So every time you want to know why it seems like the right gets a pass by the media? It's bc two of 4 forms of media are firmly tilted their direction and the other 2 -- print and internet -- one is dying and the other is totally unreliable.

[mad-raptorzzz]

[ID: A drawing of six random pokemon done from memory, so all of them look slightly...off. The first one is a green six-legged spider/ant/scorpion hybrid with a stinger. The second is a brown blob that has boxing gloves and angry eyes. The third is a white abominable snowman with green ears, hands, and feet. It's arms are above it's head in rage. The fourth is a pink gliding insect with crab claws and a scorpion tail, it's tongue sticks out between it's fangs as it spreads blue wings. The fifth is a yellow monkey-esque creature with no eyes and just a nose. The sixth is a rectangular black and grey dog with a mustache and large teeth. /End]

Oh boy. I found a random pokeom generator and asked it to give me six randoms. And mates, I was humbled. I quickly realized I only know up to Sinnoh well. And up to Alola barely. So yeah. Here we have golisopod, hitmonlee, abomasnow, gligar, solosis, and mabosstiff. I am working on doing them all with references. I think I also want to do six random legendaries and six from the OG 150 (because TBH those are the ones I know the best)

Anyway, enjoy. I think it's fun to try and draw something you don't know and have no idea what it looks like and make a fool of yourself. I enjoyed it

[nymphrasis]

kuruna blog when👁️👁️

I saw this earlier but didn't answer until now ( Got busy irl and preoccupied with working on @ask-the-abomination intro ;w; ).

But I can answer your question now! All I could really say is: I don't know whether or not I'll make a blog about here ;w;. Here are my reasons: - She is still a WIP when it comes to ideas. I already have some things fleshed out already ( Like her role being a princess who is trying to rebuild her fallen kingdom with herself and her guardsmen or how she really wants to roll in the largest mud puddle to ever exist :3 ). But there are others I am still working on. Biggest example is her age. I have yet to decide what age I want to make her. I did wanted to see Disney princesses ages to get an idea but there is a large variety and left me still undecided ;w; - I have three ask blogs. Aside from the one mention about, there is also @ask-the-edge-of-evolution and @ask-the-tale-of-kingdoms. Both of which I want to provide art ( Edge-Of-Evolution emotes and Tale-of-Kingdoms headshots ). Hence both being set into a sudden hiatus for the time being ( I don't like my ask blog post being blank without some sort of art added into it, just so it feels a little more... Alive? Just something that isnt just words. But that is only for in-character stuff! ) ;w;. - I could handle a fourth blog just fine, but I am worried that I may not be able to provide much or at least be at a slower pace. Because Kuruna is a freshly new character in a freshly new world building for her, it takes time to create some good ideas ;w;. Like... I could possibly wing it and let the ideas come to me naturally. But I wary if it ends up leading to something forgotten, plot holes, or I have a idea block that leads to taking longer to proceeding with the blog c.c I love Kuruna and would 100% love to make an ask blog about her! But I genuinely am not sure yet due to listed concerns ;w;. I can give this some more thought and could announce it at some point! I have notice people from here and other medias do love her ;w;. So I won't shoot this idea down ( But I won't promise that I will go through with making an ask blog of her. I will think first! ) <3

[jezabatlovesbats]

Going off of this post, I started brainstorming ideas for what a musical adaptation of Monsters Inc. would actually look like because I'm stupid.

Of course, none of this would actually happen! These are all just thoughts!

Also, I should warn you that, whenever I try to do things like this, what I say never makes sense.

I saw this person's idea, but from what I've seen, musical adaptations of movies often change more than just a few things.

For starters, I don't agree with the idea of using puppets to play the characters. Personally, I see the monsters' actors wearing SpongeBob Musical-ish costumes representing their characters, but with more non-human aspects, like the additions of horns and wings and stuff.

I totally agree with having the curtain call be the cast singing an extended version of Put That Thing Back Where It Came From Or So Help Me! But, I would keep the part where Mike sings it to distract the coworkers. That way, the curtain call would be a nice payoff, with Mike leading everyone in the song.

I also agree with having the door to the Himalayas go right to the Abominable Snowman's cave. It would help with the pacing. Also, yes- remove the sledding scene.

Now, for how I would change up the actual plot, because that person seemed to just be copy-pasting the movie for the most part...

Maybe the opening scene can be Mike and Sulley doing their little scare floor exercises while getting ready for their day. Like, the first thing we see is a kid sleeping in bed, and Sulley steps out from the closet to scare it, but then the lights come on, and Mike comes out from under the covers, revealing that he was holding a dummy. Then, we get our opening number, which establishes how the monster world works and the scream shortage problem and also how dangerous kids are. It ends with Sulley, Mike and the other monsters arriving at the factory.

After the opener is when we start hearing about the all-time scare record. And, maybe during the early scenes of Act I is where the parts about Mr. Bile/Phlegm and the new scare recruits can go. Like, before or after the scare floor scene, we could see Mr. Waternoose coaching Phlegm, and then he comes over to ask Sulley about showing him how it's done and all that.

I imagine the scare floor sequence being an entire song, where each monster gets a chance to show off what they're good at. It would end abruptly; Charlie cuts everyone off with his, "23-19!" He could also do a fourth wall break and shout, "WAIT! STOP THE MUSIC! 23-19!"

I also imagine this adaptation touching upon the characters' backstories more. Like, Mike and Sulley could have lines about their time at Monsters University (yes, I am making references to it).

Randall could, too. He could probably lament to Fungus about how he and Mike used to be buddies in college, but then he was humiliated, leading him to resent Sulley and Mike. And, just like I said in my earlier post, I would want Randall to have a solo number. That could be his solo.

If I Didn't Have You has to be one of the songs! I would put it in a scene where Mike and Sulley reconcile after their argument.

I would swap out the climactic chase in the big vault of doors for something more stage-friendly, but I don't know what.

I don't want the scene where Mike shows Sulley Boo's fixed door to come after the final number, like that person implied. During a vamp or an interlude in the finale, Mike can take Sulley aside to show him that he fixed her door. Sulley opens it to see her behind it, and then everybody comes out for the big finish.

That's all I've got. I should never be a playwright or director.

[god-whispers]

jul 25

a brief overview of the signs

"and He opened their understanding, that they might comprehend the Scriptures." luke 24:45

let me say that i can in no way present in this short message all the evidence that causes many to "see the day approaching."  i will do what i can but for those wanting a more descriptive explanation i would refer you to two channels on youtube.  (yes, God can use youtube to His glory also.)  they are "generation 2434" and "dr barry awe."  they present many videos between them expounding the signs.  there are also many others, but these are enough.  now on to my brief rendition.

first let me say that i believe in a pre-trib rapture of His saints and in the seven year plan God ordained for mankind.  there were two thousand years without law, two thousand years under the law, two thousand years of grace followed by a one thousand year reign of Christ.

"and he said, 'look, i am making known to you what shall happen in the latter time of the indignation; for at the appointed time the end shall be.'" dan 8:19  daniel was told to seal up the vision just as much of scripture has been sealed, waiting for the appointed time; the end time.  but now seals are being broken and knowledge has increased.  "i have now come forth to give you skill to understand." dan 9:22  these are the watchmen God has called to study the signs.  "and what I say to you, I say to all: Watch!" mark 13:37

new revelation has taught us that pentecost is not the traditional time we celebrate, but a full fifty days later.  traditional pentecost (shavout) was ascension day and not an unspecified day, devoid of a feast.  new revelation also has true pentecost as a hidden "feast of wine" celebrated preceding the ninth of av, a repeatedly day of destruction for the jewish people.  this year the ninth of av begins at sunset on july 26 this year.

we have the story of ruth and boaz, a clear sign of the gentile bride and her kinsman redeemer.  when was it ruth went to lay at his feet?  it was the ninth of av, a time of summer harvest.  it was there her destiny was forever linked to her redeemer.  "He who gathers in summer is a wise son." prov 10:5  we know Jesus is a wise son.

pentecost - the day the church was born into existence, followed by "the time of Jacob’s trouble" (i.e., the tribulation).  so how do we see all that pointing to this time and not some other?  convergence.  not a single sign but a multitude of them.  no one is saying God specifically said this day is "the day," but even as those at His first coming didn't read the signs, will we be guilty of the same?

there is also the mention of ten kings in revelation.  next month there will be a meeting of the "brics" nations to invite a further five into their group.  their intention is to establish a new world currency, demolishing the sovereignty of the dollar.  "these are of one mind, and they will give their power and authority to the beast." rev 17:13  will money control be the power given to the beast monitoring buying and selling for the whole world?

and then we have the UN meeting scheduled for september to confirm an already existing covenant for seven years, which just happens to fall on the feast of trumpets.  could this possibly be what was spoken of by the prophet daniel?  "then he shall confirm a covenant with many for one week." dan 9:27  and what is the rest of that scripture?  "but in the middle of the week He shall bring an end to sacrifice and offering.  and on the wing of abominations shall be one who makes desolate, even until the consummation, which is determined, is poured out on the desolate." dan 9:27  here we have the antichrist making his appearance and the beginning of the opening of the seals in heaven; God's seals of judgment for the tribulation.

there are now nearly eight billion people inhabiting the earth and by the opening of the fourth seal a fourth of them will be dead.  that's nearly two billion people.  i can't see any "safe haven" for those believing in a post tribulation rapture.  there are yet seven trumpets and seven bowls of judgment before the wrath of God is complete.

"for God did not appoint us to wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ." 2 thess 5:9  "because you have kept My command to persevere, I also will keep you from the hour of trial which shall come upon the whole world, to test those who dwell on the earth." rev 3:10  "and her child was caught up to God and His throne." rev 12:5  (we are those "caught up" who will rule and reign with Jesus.)  we have these and many other typologies throughout scripture indicating a coming rescue for His saints.  the tribulation saints are an entirely different scenario and will be given over to the devil at some point.

so now we come to the gist of it all.  can we say we believe in His promised rapture in the "twinkling of an eye" and yet refuse to believe this COULD be THE DAY?  "if you will not believe, surely you shall not be established." isa 7:9  again, it's not how good any of us are or how established we are in doctrine.  do you believe in the name and saving blood of Jesus?  "for by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God." eph 2:8  even the faith to believe is a gift from God but the choice is always ours.  everyone is given a measure of faith.

"for you yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so comes as a thief in the night... but you, brethren, are not in darkness, so that this day should overtake you as a thief." 1 thes 5:2,3  then we have this warning in revelation: "therefore if you will not watch, I will come upon you as a thief, and you will not know what hour I will come upon you." rev 3:3

just what are we waiting for?  not for a day, but for our Lord and Savior.  we try to read the signs and discern the times as our understanding allows, but now we see through a glass darkly.  now we see talk of aliens, a one world currency, israel on the brink of war, world war 3, artificial intelligence, lawlessness, gender confusion along with coming for the innocents and we cry, "how long o Lord?"

if this day should come and pass and we are still here, will i be sorry?  exceedingly.  will i cease to expect and watch?  never.  our Lord commanded us to do so and my heart can do no less.  however, i will give the 26th three or four days until i begin to look for another time.  love has captured me and i seek no release from it's hold.  this world has long since lost it's luster to me.  against the shining of my Lord Jesus it is a mere spark in the dark.  if our Lord still be waiting and watching for the call of the Father, i will tarry with Him this time.  pray we not fall into sleep as the disciples did.  if i be labeled foolish i will gladly be a fool for Christ.

whether this be the day or not, we are watching for we have heard and are heeding His warning.  we SEE the day approaching.  "and what I say to you, I say to all: Watch!" mark 13:37  maranatha!!!

[aikofanfan]

Peace

Summary: Solomon’s cooking sends you back to the past. Again. What could possibly happen?

Pairings: None.

Warnings: None!

A/n: I had a need.

Why do you keep letting him talk you into eating even a small molecule of whatever hellish abomination he claims is food he made???

This is what the third fourth time you’ve been sent back into the past from Solomon’s cooking via a dream? You don’t even know anymore and maybe that’s the more concerning thing. That this is almost the norm.

“Maybe I can talk him into going into a cooking class after I beat the living-” you were grumbling to yourself as you wander around the outside of the Celestial Realm. The amount of times you’ve been sent here was jarring but you knew now where to keep low and wait for yourself to wake up. “When I get my hands on him I outta-!”

“My you sound almost as scary as Lucifer!”

You jump and slowly look over your shoulder and find a woman staring at you with a big smile.

Wait a moment…where have you seen her before?

“I’m Lilith! And who might you be??” She holds her hand out to you and you feel all the color leave from your face. You take her hand and shake but you don’t speak.

Lilith. This was Lilith.

“I um uh.” You don’t know what to say. For once you have no idea what to do.

“It’s okay if you don’t wanna tell me your name. You must be new around here though!” Lilith went onto say. Before you could even think of an excuse, she grabs your hand again and drags you along with her.

She began to show you around the Celestial Realm, even in places Simeon or Luke couldn’t take you back in the present. She was everything the brothers told you and more. You even understood why Lucifer and the others stood up and fought for her, and why it was so crushing to lose her. Why Belphie and Beel still have a hard time not blaming themselves for what happened.

“I saved the best spot for last!” Lilith guides you over to opening with some tree around it and gestures with her hands. “The best place in all the realms to watch the sun set!”

“Wow…” you gasp. You feel like you could almost see glimpses of the Devildom and Human world from here as the sun coats the land in a soft golden glow.

“I don’t show this spot to many you know. In fact you’re the only other one outside of Beel and Belphie that know about it.” Lilith says and sits on the ground, gesturing you to sit beside her. You do and you couldn’t help but think in that moment. Maybe you could change the events that are yet to come but…

“It’s okay. I know who you are. I have for awhile now.” Lilith spoke again and you turn your head to her. “I see a bit of myself in you. The sparkle in your eyes when we talk about my brothers.”

She turned to you and smiled.

“Lilith there’s so much I want to say.” You began but she held up her hand and stops you from continuing.

“One question.” She says. “Are they happy?”

You nod.

“Good. Then that’s enough for me. Knowing someone like you is at their said gives me more peace of mind, more than any words could describe.” She says. Her wings unfold and one wraps around you like a blanket. “You should be waking up soon.”

You feel your eyes become heavy. Her wing pulls you closer so your head is on her shoulder and you hear her whisper:

“Thank you for watching over them.”

~~~~~

“Hey they’re waking up!” You hear Thirteen say. She pulls you up into a sitting position, her arm on your back to keep you up right. “You okay?!”

“Yeah yeah I’m good. What happened? Ow man my head…” you groan.

“Blame the dipshit hanging up by his ankle.” The reaper says and points up. You look up and find Solomon swinging gently side to side by his ankle on the ceiling fan.

“Good to see you awake.” He says, waving his hand. Thirteen helps you up and all seven of the brothers swarm around you while also cursing Solomon. Either by words alone or not you don’t dare to ask.

“Hey why are you crying? Did you have a nightmare while you were out?” Belphie asks, wiping some tears off your face.

“Ah, no. I got sent back to the past again by a dream.” You sigh.

“Solomon you dumbass!” Mammon hissed but you get him to back down.

“I didn’t run into any of you but rather….Lilith.” You said slowly and everyone froze.

“Lilith?” Simeon makes his presence known as he walks over.

“As in our sister. That Lilith?” Belphie urged. You nod and tell them what happened.

“She knew and she just…accepted what was to come.” Asmo sighed with a deep frown.

“I was ready. I was ready to try and change the outcome but she didn’t want that. She even thanked me for being beside you guys.” You explained. “Being around her made me understand you all even better.”

“We’ll always miss Lilith that won’t ever change but we’re glad we have you now.” Belphie says, hugging you. “Sounds like she liked you too.”

“Yeah she showed me all over the Celestial realm and told me some stories about you guys too.” You smiled. “Like how Lucifer sneezed during an important meeting-”

“She told you what?” Lucifer interrupted and tired to stop you from saying anymore but Belphie kept blocking him.

You all go back and forth, the mood lighting up again.

“So…can someone let me down now?” Solomon asks but no one seemed to have heard him.

[deltaruminations]

caring for your horrible bird-thing gaster

we all know how it goes: you’re hunting out deeplore for your favorite story-driven indie RPG, maybe digging a little too deep in the data mines, when you realize you’ve caught the attention of a fourth-dimensional daimon with the personality of a perpetually hungover post-doc researcher, and now he’s scuttling around your walls and asking you for your favorite flavor of blood.

wuh-oh!!!

you cannot fix him, nor can you get rid of him, but with a little know-how, you can learn to coexist peacefully with him until he loses interest on his own or finally achieves whatever inscrutable peace his restless, tortured mind is seeking. whichever comes first!

and who knows — maybe you’ll find this curse is really a blessing in disguise! for the right person, the bird-thing can make a very good friend. he already chose you, didn’t he? :)

SO, here are my Top Tips for living with your personal instance of the horrible bird-thing!!!!

🕊️ bird-thing 101!!

be not afraid!!! while he may be a towering Luciferan abomination of shattered bone and twisted wings, the bird-thing means you no harm. he is simply curious about his new friend! remember: underneath his hollow, mask-like visage and nest of tangled limbs, the bird-thing is a deeply self-conscious, lonely nerd with the social skills of moldy drywall. he’s more afraid of you than you are of him!

despite having what look and feel much like bones, feathers, hooves, and fur, keep in mind that your bird-thing is really just the distilled consciousness of the world’s most pathetic lich, which exists separately from any physical form. the vessel he presents to you is a non-biological construct formed out of the concept of vacuum and forced by the quantum-field perturbations rippling from his past actions into the shape of his sin. he’s not like a dog or a cat or your gay aunt’s cockatoo — his needs are as special and unique as he is!

because your bird-thing is a cruel, mocking shell of his former self and literally made of Nothing, he has no need for food, water, or medicine. talk about easy!

your bird-thing may display strong signs of autism. that is because he is autistic

if your bird-thing’s wings seem to be perpetually broken, backward in their sockets, constantly shedding feathers, or otherwise looking malformed or diseased, DO NOT PANIC! this is normal and natural for him! it is a punishment from God

likewise, it is perfectly normal for your bird-thing to have several cracks in (and possibly large chunks missing from) his skull, to smell lightly of ozone and scorched bone, to resemble an emaciated raven trapped against the windshield of a rapidly-moving truck, and to occasionally drip a thick, tarry substance from his feathers and/or the cracks in his head. don’t worry! there is no need to bring him to a doctor or vet. he can’t get any sicker than he already is!

your bird-thing should have six wings and seven voices. if he is missing any of those, just lock him in a lightless space (basement, closet, large safe, etc.) for a while and he will knit the missing pieces back together from the quantum strings binding him from across space-time to his countless regrets. if you hear any wailing, weeping, pounding against the door, and/or desperate pleas to be let out, IGNORE THEM! they are a normal part of the process and a sign that it is working :)

the holes in your bird-thing’s hands should appear to you as pitch-black, bottomless voids, regardless of what’s on the other side of his hand. whatever you do, DO NOT look directly into the holes with intent to see through them. in the event that any image(s) start to manifest within their inky depths, avert or close your eyes IMMEDIATELY, no matter how fascinating or beautiful the image(s) may be, or you may find your perception of reality irrevocably altered by the Thrall of Hole.

the one exception to this is Egg produced from the Hole. it is safe to look upon Egg, for Egg is a Gift. the offering of Egg appears to be a bonding ritual of great importance to the bird-thing, and it is advisable to accept it. Egg will typically resemble that of a chicken — normally white, occasionally brown, and sometimes dyed and painted, often around holidays. the purpose of Egg is unknown, only that it is of middling importance and should be saved. Egg will not go bad, but may become more Egg over time. if you decide you have no use for Egg, then there will be no Egg. Egg is wonderful to share with family and friends!

if you are very concerned about the Thrall of Hole, consider covering the holes with gloves or mittens — safe, practical, AND fashionable! because your bird-thing has terrible, uncanny skeletal human-hands, the options are endless — anything in a men’s size extra-large should work! if you have trouble with him immediately taking them off, consider investing in a quality pair of handsome, smart-casual gloves. his vanity is easily appeased by fine leather.

if your bird-thing gaster has pink and yellow eyes and a wide, toothy smile, that is NOT your bird-thing gaster! that is your FRIEND puppeting his shape. if you find yourself in the company of your FRIEND, keep calm! all you have to do is get as far away as you can as quickly as you can and then stay there, never again letting your gaze linger over shadows, never again trusting a grin, and never ever ever answering the goddamned phone, no matter how incessantly it rings, no matter if you’ve destroyed every phone you own and your skull still rattles with the endless ringing ringing ringing. see? easy peasy!

and finally, if you’re ever unsure what to do, just take a deep breath and remember: your bird-thing gaster cannot die, no matter how much he wants to!