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#some days are hard....I stopped writing about that maybe I should say a few things again on my damn drinking problem
pomefioredove · 5 months
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now I'm actually invested in this idea. maybe I'll write a full length fic someday idk... for now I have short hcs
parts 1 | 2 | 3 | kalim | bad ending
summary: crowley decides to "give away" yuu to the highest "donation" for financial reasons type of post: headcanons characters: all nrc students additional info: can be read as platonic or romantic, except malleus is pretty romantic, second person pov, yuu is gender neutral, maybe a little ooc I wrote this as soon as I got up
crowley has had his fair share of "what the fuck" moments from you but this was really taking the cake
he acts so... casual about it?
swaggers into ramshackle one morning and says times are tough and your personal expenses are straining the budget so he's decided to "put you in someone else's care"
"The screening process will be vigorous to make sure you end up in good hands!" like you're a cat or something "Your expenses will be covered and you'll have somewhere to go during break!"
okay great. pretty obvious you have no say in this, so you don't even argue. what's the worst that could happen?
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Ace, Deuce, Jack, and Epel find you the next day to say they're pooling their money to buy you
"To what?"
Epel shrugs. "Oh, well Crowley said we need to offer a donation to prove we're capable of supporting you..."
(you think that if not for the laws of this land you would have slaughtered that old fart)
Jack goes on a really long tirade about how shady and underhanded this is, making sure to reaffirm that he believes you should be free to make your own choices
"So you'll let me go once you get me?"
"Uhhh..."
Ace thinks once they buy you you'll have no choice but to do all of his homework for him
Deuce says that's not really how it works- and even if he tried, Riddle would kill him
(they've already gone over this twice before finding you)
Epel happily volunteers to take you home with him over breaks, probably the only positive in this mess
even if he thinks the whole thing is kind of funny
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
incapable of keeping his mouth shut, Ace accidentally spills the plan to Riddle, who is understandably aghast
you can't just give away a person under your care like a toy!
of all the irresponsible things...
of course, he'll have to put up his offer, too
purely for your sake! with a nicer room and a brand new copy of the dorm rules, maybe you'll stop getting yourself into trouble
he's got some family money (doctors, naturally) and considers this a worthwhile purchase, for his sanity and yours
of course, Trey and Cater overhear and may or may not be pooling their own cash for a chance, too
going behind Riddle's back on this is a risky venture, but hey, someone's gotta be on your side, here, right?
I mean, between a bunch of sixteen year old boys, the housewarden, and them, who would you choose?
actually don't answer that
...not that it's much of a secret, anyway. Cater's already got their gofundme equivalent link in bio
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Leona initially plans to have you become a live-in lackey like Ruggie
but then he really starts thinking- and, hey, the possibilities are endless, right?
for one, you'd make a really good pillow
he might have to kick Grim out for your full attention, but you could learn to live with that
and malleus would hate it
...that's reason enough for him
plus, he's got money to burn, so why not?
either way, he sets his bid at a reasonable (maybe too confident) price and sits back to watch the chaos unfold as everyone scrambles for a piece of the pie
news travels fast around school, after all
then Ruggie finds out that you could dethrone him as Leona's #2 and is understandably a little annoyed
that's his cushy post-grad job gig, thank you! he's worked hard for that!
besides, why should Leona get to hoard you? the guy can barely take care of himself!
so, Ruggie ends up outsourcing to a few dozen classmates for the necessary funds at a steep I-owe-you price
he's gonna be eating nothing but dandelions for a while...
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
now, Azul is annoyed
once the news goes school-wide, it's all anyone can talk about
talk about good marketing...
why didn't he think of such a brilliant scam? he could have negotiated with Crowley to have a café brand deal tie-in!
of course, he's already set his bid, with Jade and Floyd offering to pitch in as necessary
it's a risky investment, sure, but a worthwhile one
Azul tells everyone that with the prefect's "obvious" popularity, having them at the café a few nights a week would drive sales through the roof
though that's really just what he says to shirk suspicion
a likely excuse coming from him, though, really, it would just be nice having you around
and if not for his own affections, Floyd's incessant begging and Jade's subtly manipulative comments about "how nice" it would be having a new face around would be enough for him to cave eventually
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
"Kalim, no," is the first thing that Jamil says
"I strongly advise against this. It's another one of Crowley's silly scams and you could end up a target bec- are you even listening?"
hint: he is not
the second Kalim found out that he could get to take in his favorite magicless student like one of his treasures, he was all over it
(AKA infinite sleepovers)
and for what? a little optional donation to prove he's got the funds? he's got cash to spare!
he's already got your new room in Scarabia set up before he even puts his bid in
right next to his of course :)
and despite what Jamil insists, he himself might be working behind the curtain just a little to ensure he's the one who ends up with you
after all, why should Kalim get everything? this might be a valuable learning opportunity for him
You don't always get what you want
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
as much as Epel tries to keep the rest of his dorm from finding out, it's inevitable
he's actually a little surprised that the news didn't get to Vil sooner
with Rook around campus, surely he must have said something...
when Vil does find out, though, he just sighs
oh, of course. what next, will everyone meet each other in the arena and fight to the death over the prefect?
of all the silly, immature things...
oh? what's that? he's bidding anyway? of course he is, silly potato. he can't have some unwashed miscreant making you sleep on polyester bedding
(really, he's the only person on campus worthy of your time)
Rook has also been mysteriously absent from the dorm lately, though his initials on a poem and a strangely large sum of money end up in the donation pile
but really, that could be anyone... Rook would never dare betray Vil again, right?
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Ortho finds out directly from the other first years and sends Idia the details immediately
with a little note of encouragement, of course: "could be excellent for improving your social skills!"
Idia understandably freaks out
"WTF!!!! nooo way! this is a person, not a chatbot we're talking about here! I can barely keep virtual pets alive!!!!"
(liar)
(...but this is still different)
the conversation ends there, but semi-anonymous bid from someone named "gloomurai" gets cashapp'd directly to crowley
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
everyone in the room immediately turns to Malleus
"For the record, I think it's wrong to be bargaining over a human being," Silver says first. "But if anyone could handle it with grace, it's you."
Lilia laughs. "Oh, you're just saying that because you like the prefect so much!"
"Father, you're the one who likes the prefect so much,"
"Oh, right! carry on then. After all, I'm sure we could share,"
Sebek is the only one relatively against the idea, though Lilia luckily manages to get him to lower his voice after his third speech about how you aren't good enough for his liege
Malleus is rather quiet through the whole evening, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with any of the points made
he disappears for a short while, and when he comes back he seems a little more confident
though, of course, he goes to you first
seeing him at Ramshackle in the middle of the night is a familiar and welcoming sight after all of the chaos of your week
and he's in a great mood!
"Child of man! I've come with news," he says. "I have heard of your predicament and have come up with a solution!"
you immediately sulk. "Oh, no. You know I think this whole thing is terrible, right?"
"Yes, Silver mentioned you might not like the idea of being bought and sold like a trinket. But worry not, I do not plan on paying for you in money,"
you pause, at a loss for words, and then tentatively continue. "You're not...?"
"Of course not. What a primitive idea, I was baffled to hear it myself. My proposal will be more traditional: a modest sum of treasure, and a generous amount of livestock and the finest crop Briar Valley can offer,"
certainly he's not this naive, you think
"You really think Crowley is going to accept that over money? I'm pretty sure Kalim just bid away an entire country's worth,"
he laughs. "You speak as if this is some kind of business deal! I'm quite confident that my dowry will be best,"
huh. that was a strange way of putting it
but then again, you still didn't really understand how things work here, so you go along with it
and you allow yourself to relax. he seems confident in his offer, and he doesn't even see you as some kind of prize to win!
"Oh, well, alright. Thanks! I'm glad you're on it,"
he smiles. "Rest assured, child of man, you're in good hands. My dowry will far outshine the others, and the wedding will be even better,"
"I was honestly getting a little nervous for a momen- wait- wedding!?"
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chukys-mouthguard · 3 months
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23. “Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
luke with his gf
Prompt: “Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
Note: i feel like Luke is so hard for me to read that i had to do research before writing this 😂 like Jack and Quinn give off energy and vibes that are easy for me to read, Luke is literally the opposite, so hopefully i did him justice for my first time writing with him
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“Oh my gosh, what a day!”
With a sigh you fell back onto the couch, Luke softly chuckling at you as he unpacked the takeout you’d ordered from your favorite Chinese restaurant.
“Yeah, it was really fun. Can’t wait to see how many hearts break when photos end up online of Jack and his girlfriend out there.”
Joining Luke in the kitchen you searched for your takeout container while he handed you a plate. “Yeah, Jack is gonna be Mr. Heartbreaker for a few days. The girls will get over it I’m sure.”
The two of you taking your food over to the living room, this becoming a routine you’d shared in your relationship for a few months now. Every couple weeks you’d order takeout, trying to be mindful of both of your diets, though Luke’s claims it should be a weekly tradition. The two of you’d sit on the floor around the coffee table and talk for hours while eating dinner.
It was one thing you’d never gotten tired of. Loving the opportunity to enjoy the moments together just the two of you. Always having stories to talk about, especially when Jack and Luke were on the same team. He took every chance to chirp his brother he could.
“Did you see Lazar at family skate today?”
Immediately smiling as you thought back to Lazar on the ice with his wife and son, your heart melting at the thought of it. “Yes, oh my god he is so freaking cute. And Curtis seemed just over the moon getting to share that moment with him.”
Luke nodded as he dragged his fork through his food.
“It sort of makes me excited for the day that I’ll have that, well I mean, we I guess. Not just me.”
Your cheek flushing red at his words, leaving you speechless as he looked away embarrassed. “What??”
He nervously asked as you’d yet to say anything back to him.
“Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
Luke just smiling as his cheeks grew red. He wasn’t the type to be overly emotional, leaving that role to you. But he’d felt comfortable enough to say what was on his mind.
He be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about the future with you, though only having been together a few years, he felt like it had been your whole lives. And judging by the blush on your cheeks and the smile on your face, it seemed like you weren’t opposed to the idea.
“Well, I don’t know. Just seeing guys have moments like that, can’t help but think about it happening to me you know?”
Nodding your head you couldn’t stop smiling, loving this side of Luke where he wasn’t afraid to be open and honest. Letting his guard down a bit and showing some emotion.
Moving to his side you curled up under his arm, wrapping your arms around him as he offered you a bite of his food.
“I love the idea of us having a moment like that one day.” Tilting your head up you gave him a kiss on the cheek as he smiled. “You, me, and our little girl skating around the ice.”
“Oh, you were thinking girl? Interesting, I thought boy.”
Luke shrugged as he stood up, walking to take the empty food containers to the kitchen.
“Well, looks like we are just gonna have to try for one of each then huh?”
Your eyes going wide as you stared at him, Luke just laughing while he cleaned up. “One of each? Oh my gosh, we don’t even have one kid yet and you’re already talking about multiple?”
Luke smirked at you from behind the door of the fridge as he put away the leftovers, enjoying how flustered the conversation had made you.
“It’s never too early to get started, or at least get some practice!”
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silverwhittlingknife · 3 months
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So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
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No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
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1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
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2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
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3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
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4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
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5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
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6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
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7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
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8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
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9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
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10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
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11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
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12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
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13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
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14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
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15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
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16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have.  If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
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17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
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17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
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18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
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19) In my head he’s the responsible one.  (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
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20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
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21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
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22) I trust him.  When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
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23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
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24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
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25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
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TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
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#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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miniimight · 11 months
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Gotta admit the way you write midoriya is just so... Literally can't find the words to describe it. I had this scenario I wished to request of you it's okay if you don't want to do it. Midoriya with an significant other that hears people taking about them, not deserving of him and how they are using him for his fame and all, then he teaches them a lesson?
DEFENDING YOU the gossip around the office gets on his nerves a lil bit
with izukuuuuu :heart: + gn!reader
notes absolutely in love with this request ! thanks for reading my stuffs <3
a while after you were revealed as his girlfriend, izuku was faced with many backhanded comments about his relationship. sure, they were few and far between, but when they did happen he felt his self-control diminishing way faster than usual. especially if that person had the balls to say it to his face.
to be completely honest, he thought that everyone else should mind their own fucking business. he doesn't kid around when it comes to the people he cares about. the fact that he wants and needs you is enough.
but, nonetheless. people will still run their mouths.
it was another casual day in the office. you had the day off work and he was stuck at the agency headquarters, flipping through paperwork.
you were excited to see him. izuku had been holed up in work for what seemed like forever, and you were so happy to get the chance to spend time with each other during the coming weekend.
as you walked through the halls, you noticed the eyes following you. they were hard to miss, but they were part of the routine at this point. you soon found yourself in the elevator, head ducked as you pulled out your phone.
izu: you coming up soon baby?
you: yeah, i'm like 5 mins away
you: okay im in the lobby, heading up rn
izu: yayyy can't wait to see you, love :3
you smiled softly to yourself. when you looked up, the elevator was packed; all you could see were the backs of the seven or so individuals in front of you, pushing you into the corner. your stomach felt a little uneasy, thinking about how you'd have to tell these people to move to let you through, but you remembered izuku was on the top floor. there was no way they were all heading there.
the hushed voices of a few employees made your heart pound.
"you're talking about deku's s/o?"
"yeah! aren't they... i dunno. a little out of his league?"
"i'm saying! like i'd get it if they were maybe a model or something. but they're literally just a civilian. how disappointing is that? like uravity is right there."
"i'm sure they're just using him for his fame. he's in the field so much with other badass heroes, they probably barely get to see him. if deku wasn't deku, they'd dip in a heartbeat."
they all laughed.
you wanted to stop listening. flood your mind with meaningless thoughts to distract you. but you couldn't resist tuning in, feeding your insecurities and doubt.
the ding of the elevator saved you. they filed out of the elevator, leaving you with the cheerful jingle of the lift.
you were quiet as you walked down the long halls of the top floor, their words echoing in your mind. you knew they weren't true—and god, would izuku reassure the fuck out of you—but negativity was negativity. and negativity had a way of finding cracks and slipping through.
the giant glass doors slid over the tiled floor soundlessly, yet izuku's head popped up from behind all the papers and files at your arrival.
a huge grin bloomed on his face as he sped over to you, paperwork forgotten. "hello, honey. did you get up here okay?"
"yeah," you smiled and held up a takeout bag. "i got some snacks for us."
izuku's calculating gaze bore into you as he gingerly accepted the bag. "you alright?"
"hmm?" you tilted your head in confusion. of course he noticed. "yeah, i'm good." the last thing you wanted to do was stress him out even more.
his brows furrowed. he stepped closer to you, his hands resting on your waist. "don't lie to me, sweetheart." his tone was scolding but his eyes were gentle. "what's bothering you?"
you pursed your lips, sighing. "just a couple people talking about us, 'n how i don't deserve you—"
you felt him stiffen, his expression going cold.
"how i'm using you for the fame, blah, blah, blah." you forced a smile, trying to play it off in an amusing light. "you know, the usual."
izuku was tightlipped, responding only with a "hmm."
he was staring at the wall behind you, eyes narrowed as if he'd seen a villain or something. you knew that expression well.
you cupped his face, guiding him to look at you. "hey. it's okay, izu, i'm used to it. don't mind them, alright?"
izuku's gaze softened and he leaned into one of your palms, the other lifted off his face by his own hand. he pressed a little kiss to your wrist, rubbing his hand up and down your arm soothingly as you both walked out his office.
he decided to drop it, and just love the shit out of you as an apology for experiencing such disrespect. even if he did everything in his power to make sure everyone knew he belonged to you just as much as you belonged to him, he still felt guilty when people attacked you.
he still had many questions: who were they, what floor did they get off, and how can i discipline them? he usually felt sympathy for when employees messed up, but suddenly... he wasn't against firing them all.
the ride down to the lobby was filled with many adoring employees who giggled at the sight of the pro-hero, a phenomenon you were also very familiar with.
soon, you were gliding through the lobby, so close to freedom when he picks up on the idle chatter he hates so much.
"i think that's them!"
"it is. woah, his s/o is way more dull when you see 'em next to each other."
izuku grit his teeth. his eyes glanced down to you, seeing the way you blinked and pursed your lips. he suddenly paused. you walked forward a couple steps before you were tugged back by his stationary hand.
you looked at him curiously. "izu..?" your eyes darted around, lingering on the three that said those things about you.
he smiled, bending over you as he kissed your lips gently, pecking your forehead as well. "why don't you go to the car, love? i'll catch up in a second."
you gave him a warning look, noticing how he was drifting to where the three sat. "izu... really, let's just go."
he kissed you again and your head was swimming. "i'll only be a minute, angel. go on." he pat your back and watched as you left the lobby. when he turned around his expression was completely different.
he walked over to the three people, who instantly straightened at his approach. they shared glances with each other, both a little scared and confused.
"hello." izuku smiled, but there was no indication that he was happy. "i'm deku, and you all are..?"
they meekly listed their names, to which izuku took mental notes and nodded.
"great. uhm, i overheard you talking about my s/o?" he cocked his head to the side. "please, i'd love to hear your thoughts." he chuckles. "i'm kinda obsessed with them, or whatever."
"o-oh..." they stutter and avoid his gaze, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "no, it was nothing, really."
"hmm? nothing?" izuku and his months of public appearance training only made him more intimidating when angry; the joyless smile he wore as annoyance bubbled through him was ten times worse then any outright show of anger. "are you sure?"
"yes! promise." one nods eagerly.
he laughs mirthlessly and the three weakly chuckled along, thinking they were out of trouble. leaning close to them, his voice dropped into a low hum. "i'd like to keep it that way, yeah? let's not make them sad just so you could feel like you have an opinion about something that does not concern you whatsoever."
the three held onto each other, eyes rounded with shock as they listened to the pro-hero before them.
izuku's head tilted ever-so-slightly. "well?"
they began to trip over each other with their agreement, yes, of course! we wouldn't dream of it. consider it done! whatever you say!
izuku flashed his famous smile. "glad we got that sorted out. and just so that we're crystal clear, if i—or anyone for that matter—catch you talking down on my s/o again..." he pursed his lips, his eyes narrowing in thought. "i'd hate to have to terminate your contracts... it's a lot of paperwork, you know?"
they shook their heads, bowing deeply to the pro-hero. "never again, sir!"
"great!" izuku chirped. "bye!"
[]
your leg bobbed nervously in the car, wondering what izuku was doing and if you should go in there and see for yourself. just as you were about to act, you saw his green hair bob over the cars beside you, eventually coming into view.
you exhaled in relief as he slipped into the driver's seat, sighing happily. he turned to stare at you, leaning dreamily over the steering wheel. you smiled, though your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"you're so pretty." he sighed.
"i—" you blinked, laughing. "thank you, baby."
"i'm so lucky to have you..." he continued, leaning over the compartment separating your seats.
you giggled, matching his energy. "mhmm."
he gave you a lopsided smile. "you deserve everything i have and more."
your face felt warm as you shy away from him, knowing why he was spouting all these affirmations. his fingers hooked under your chin, tilting your face. his hair brushed against your forehead as he captured your lips. he grinned at you when he pulled away, staring at you with such adoration.
"so..." you ignore your racing heart and try to regulate your breathing. "are you gonna tell me what happened?"
he squished your cheeks before turning back in his seat, starting the car. "nope!"
you smiled and rolled your eyes, uncertainties gone and doubt erased. in the end, you weren't ever bothered. and strangely, you never saw those three faces again.
© miniimight ! thanks for reading <3
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moonstruckme · 6 months
Note
omg hi! I love your writing so much and I’ve seen that you asked for doctor Remus requests and he’s on my mind day and night, I simply love how you write him. I don’t know if it’s a thing in other countries as well but in mine you have to go to the doctors around your birthday for like check ups and stuff like that, mine is coming up and I’m already dreading it (mostly because of the blood test, I end up fainting every time😣) but I’m sure it would be better if it was with Remus instead🥰
Thanks for requesting sweetheart, hope it goes okay!!
cw: description of anxiety, mention of needle, implied blood
doctor!Remus x fem!reader ♡ 972 words
The doctor’s voice is so soothing you keep almost forgetting where you are. You don’t even think he’s doing it on purpose. 
“Alright.” He catches your ankle before you can kick him, sharing a smile with you as he pockets the small mallet he’s been using to test your reflexes. “Everything seems perfect.” 
“Thanks,” you say, then feel stupid.
You don’t know why you’re acting like he’s complimented you. You’re getting flustered by his raspy timbre and attractive hands (which had, just a few minutes before, felt gently along your neck and the underside of your jaw like you were a thing to be treated with care. Not that that’s important). The doctor—Remus, he’d told you to call him—smiles politely anyway. 
“All that’s left to do is get you sorted at the lab,” he says, typing something quickly into his computer, “and then you’re free to go. Ready?” 
“Um, yeah.” It’s a struggle to hear yourself over the beating of your heart. You can only hope you sound normal. You’d known this was coming, and still it’s giving you the cold sweats. “I just feel like I should maybe warn you, I tend not to do well with the blood test.” 
He glances over. “You’ve had problems before?” 
“I sometimes faint.” Your foot starts jiggling of its own accord. You don’t notice until Remus’ gaze drops to it. You stop. “Every time, actually.” 
“That’s fine,” he says, straightening and turning away from the computer. “In that case, I’ll probably keep you in here so we can do it with you lying down. Does that sound alright?” 
You blink. “Um, sure.” 
The nerves are hard to miss in your voice now, and you can’t quite meet Remus’ eyes as he directs a gentle smile your way. He gives your knee a squeeze on his way to the door.
“I’m going to go get some things,” he tells you. “I’ll be back soon, but while I’m gone I just want you to practice taking some deep breaths, yeah?” 
You nod. Another flash of that small, reassuring smile as he goes out the door. 
You try to do as he says, forcing your lungs to fill and then empty and attempting to ignore the pounding of your heartbeat. You can feel it in your face, in your temples, in your teeth. You’ll think you’re starting to get it to slow, and then a pair of footsteps will come down the hall and it’ll speed right back up again. 
It’s almost a relief when Remus comes back, putting an end to your apprehensive torment. 
“You can go ahead and lay back, love,” he says, holding the supplies low where you can hardly see them, and you take care not to try. The paper crinkles underneath you as you flatten out on your back. Remus chuckles when it tears a bit and you wince. “You’re fine, it can’t be helped. I’m just going to feel for a vein, alright? Not doing anything just yet.” 
You keep your gaze on the ceiling as his gloved finger probes gently at the crook of your elbow. It’s hopelessly plain and undiverting up there, no tiles to count or anything. 
“How are you feeling?” Remus asks conversationally. 
“Okay.” Your voice comes out with a bit of squeak to it, not entirely convincing. 
“Keep breathing for me.” The warmth of his touch leaves, and then a rubbery tourniquet is being tied around your arm. “I don’t want you to worry about fainting. It’s perfectly alright if you do, but we’re going to do our best to keep that from happening, okay?” 
You nod. “Okay.” 
“Good, just try and stay relaxed.” His voice drops lower, and now you know the soothing effect is intentional, each of his words mellow and mollifying. “Any plans for after you leave here?” 
“I, um.” You tense when you feel the cold wipe swipe over your elbow. Remus thumbs over your forearm calmingly. “I don’t know.” 
“Seems like you deserve a sweet or something after this, yeah? What sort of things do you like?” 
“I did buy myself ice cream,” you admit, “to have after I get home.” 
“Smart girl.” There’s a smile in Remus’ voice. You’re tempted to lift your head and see it for yourself, but you don’t. “I like the pre-planning. What kind is it?” 
You feel the odd bite of the needle into your skin, and your breath catches. 
“You’re alright,” he promises you, rubbing the inside of your forearm again. “What kind of ice cream did you get, sweetheart?” 
You swallow. “It’s that new, fancy gelato kind.” Your voice sounds higher than before. 
“Oh, I haven’t tried that yet. What flavor?” 
You’re starting to get a bit dizzy. “Chocolate cherry?”
“That sounds fantastic. I’m quite partial to chocolate myself.” You feel something shift, and Remus says, “Nearly done. You might be convincing me to pick some of that up. You’ll have to come back here and give me your thoughts once you’ve finished it.” 
You laugh a little, and he echoes it. 
“Keep still,” he reminds you. 
“Sorry.” 
“No, don’t be.” You feel the needle come out. It surprises you, a quiet whimper slipping from inside your throat. He tsks kindly. “All done, love. You did really well.” 
“Seriously?” You lift your head, and Remus’ eyes are faintly amused as they meet yours. He’s sticking a bandage over your arm. 
“Very seriously,” he confirms. “You did beautifully. That ice cream is well deserved.” 
The laugh that leaves you is light and pitchy with disbelief. “Thank you. I really owe you your own ice cream, after this.” 
He wraps a hand around your elbow, helping you to sit back up. “Careful,” he says lightly, “I might hold you to that. Next time I see you, I’ll be expecting a detailed review at the least.”
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shelbgrey · 5 months
Note
Hey Pookie so there is this very sexy man named Mark Sloan and I was wondering if you could write some beautiful Fluffy/Smutty dating Headcanons for him PLZ
Dating Mark Sloan headcanons
Paring: Mark Sloan x Shepherd!Reader
Summary: headcanons about Mark Sloan dating Derek's little sister -SMUT warning!
💚MasterList ML2 💚Dating Mood board
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You guys started fake dating... That's how it all started. He wanted to make Addison Jelouse and you just want to get back at her for hurting your brother Derek.
You had 10 rules to this plan:
NO Sex - you
Never break rule #1 - you
Be on Mark's services/work in plastics if needed -Mark
Go on dates at least twice a month to make the act look real - Mark
No kissing or touching - if you have to just kiss forehead/cheek and don't touch anything below the waist - you
No sex with nurses, Mark - it'll blow the cover - you
Be nice to my friends(I don't care if you hate interns) - you
Trust each other - mark
Don't play favorites in the hospital - includes not helping with most surgeries/patients - you
Don't fall in love with each other - you
Derek hates it at first, even during the time you guys were faking it all. “stay away from my sister” Derek snapped at mark.
“too late... We're already together”
Derek and Mark got into a fight... That ended with black eyes, bruises, and Mark needing stitches on his face.
“I'm sorry this happened” you mumbled softly as you stitched his jaw for him. He stared at you with those blue eyes you love so much. “don't worry about it”
“maybe we should stop this whole thing” you suggested, Mark shook his head. “no, we got this. Rule #8, remember?” but really he was already falling so hard for you and he wanted to keep you close as long as possible.
Spoil alert you guys broke rule #10 and fell hard for each other. Well he fell first, but you fell harder. “I want this for real... No more fake shit, I love you”
After that ordeal you figured you owed Derek an explanation. Derek never found out about the fake dating, but you need to tell him where your feeling stand. “you love him, don't you?” Derek asks.
“I do... And I trust him” you say.
“if he hurts you... Cheats on you, I'll kill him” simply Derek said and you guys moved on with your lives.
Once you guys start dating for real he faithful and his heart now belongs to you.
Even Derek gave him credit for that. During the few months of you guys actually dating, deek would keep an eye on him. A hot nurse would walk by and Mark wouldn't even look at her.
You see a different side to Mark. He stops looking at any other woman. He just looks at you.
His sweeter, gentler side is only reserved for you.
Callie is your biggest supporter. Always hyping your relationship up. Mark might go to her for relationship advice. Callie might even be a referee during arguments.
Callie is definitely your best friend. You, Mark, and her the hospital's main trio.
Double dates with Callie and Arizona or Derek and Meredith.
He needs physical contact all the time. Rather it be cuddling on bed or on the couch or holding hands in the hospital.
He's a big cuddler. Sometimes he'll just wrap his arms around you and pull you to his chest without saying anything.
He's so flirty with you. No matter how many years you've been together, he still thinks you're the sexiest, most beautiful thing he's ever seen.
Like I said, he flirts with you so much. Some times he'll come up behind you while your working and whispere suggestive comment in your ear or grab your ass.
“stop it! We're at work” you quietly scolded him after his gabered your ass. “I can't help it... You have a nice ass”
You steal his leather jacket all the time, even though it looks big on you he thinks it's hot as hell on you. Now and days the only time he sees that jacket is if your wearing it.
Dirty jokes all the time. If you hear something remotely dirty you'll whisper, “that's what she said”
If he's had a hard day, he either needs one of two things. A rough fuck or he needs to curl up beside you and cuddle.
The way he kisses you makes your heart race. He holds your face in his hands and you honestly feel like you and him are the only things that matter in the world.
But he is a rough kisser, but mostly he's a passionate kisser. He pours all his love and emotions into it, he makes sure your the only one on this earth he wants to love.
He's soft with you when it comes to holding you and give affection. He's so gentle and delicate and you can tell through the way he brushes your hair from your face or the way he nuzzles his face into your neck that he just absolutely adores you.
Your is Angel and he feels so unworthy of you. He's so lucky to have you in his life and he doesn't want to screw it up.
Mark's not the jelouse type and neither are you. Dispite his man-whore past you both have a lot of trust in your relationship, but if you be-friend Jackson I think Mark would get jelouse.
Mark hates the way Jackson looks at you, Mark knows he likes you. But your completely oblivious to it because all you see is Mark.
Doggie parents at the beginning of your relationship. You brought home a rotwiler puppy home without him knowing one time.
That dog is your protector rather or not Mark is there or not. He also gets jealous of Mark and will nuzzle his way between you too if your hugging or kissing.
Sometimes you guys will get home so late from the hospital you'll just want to set on the couch and watch TV because your both sleep deprived.
You guys really don't know why or how you got into it, but you found a Chanel that shows re-runs of American Ninja Warrior and old WWE matches. You guys just stated watching them all the time.
He calls you Angel
You guys play wrestle all the time. Sometimes he'll just let you win because he loves seeing you being so happy about.
He steals the covers all the time and if you get cold you'll cuddle closer to him to get warm. He's relized this, so he'll intentionally steal the covers just to have extra cuddle time.
You get upset if he makes the interns that are on his service get him coffee or get his dry cleaning. “they aren't your servants, Mark” you say, taking the money back from the intern.
If you want Mark to do that stuff himself, you have to threaten to do it yourself. “I'll get it, I'm going that way anyway” you say and mark will quickly stop you. “no, no, I'll do it... You don't have to do that crap for me”
You guys don't fight often, but if you do it's usually a couple of days of the silent treatment. Both of you are too stubborn to say sorry or admit your wrong too.
Watching old Universal monster movies, your favorite is The Bride of Frankenstein. You even got him to dress up at the two monsters with you on Halloween one time.
If your sick he'll drop everything and take care of you, he doesn't care if he catches whatever you have he wants you comfortable and cared for.
His apartment getting the 'girlfriend touch', everything is just cleaner and more organized when you start living with him. “where's my belt?” Mark asked looking all over the bedroom floor where it used to be.
“in your dresser where it's supposed to be... And if I step on it one more time it's going in the trash”
✨Passenger princess✨
If you have a Stanley or a water bottle, whatever you drink out of, Mark will probably be drinking out of it too. You guys kiss and have sex all the time, so he doesn't care if he drinks after you.
NSFW headcanons:
He’s an expert at foreplay. He’ll spend as much time as he can trying to get you hot and bothered or worked up.
He has a tendency to grip the headboard when he's close to cumming.
He has this mischievous kind of charm to him and he uses it to his advantage when it comes to getting your attention. He knows all your ticks and can easily get your riled up.
Mark loves bitting your neck just to hear you moan. When you finally give in to him, he'll lay you down on the couch or bed and start pealing your clothes off to reveal your chest.
He's definitely the dominant person in bed and your not complaining, he'll get rough and pound hard enough were the bed starts rocking.
The sex maybe rough, but Mark isn't not big on insults. He refuses to degrade you and will only use sweet words.
If you’re struggling to take him in or taking long to adjust, he’ll whisper reassurances that you’re doing a good job while rubbing his hands on your back and thighs.
He prefers missionary, growling in your ear while his hands grip yours above your head.
Mark also loves watching your face while you bounce up and down his dick. He loves the expressions you make when he thrusts up into you when you least expect it.
Mark just likes to lay back and just watch you ride him, he loves the feeling of your thighs and ass in his hands.
He's a soft/mean Dom, it just depends on his mood. But no matter what he always makes sure your comfortable. He loves to take control in the bed but would never push you.
He loves the sounds you make. The moaning, the begging, everything.
Loves eating you out,your legs around his head. He loves your legs in general and loves leaving kisses on the insides of your thighs. He'd rather pleasure you for hours than receive.
He has big chocking kink, he won't be too rough about but he loves wrapping his fingers around your neck and feeling your pulse when he's ramming into you.
He love getting head. I feel like he’d like having you on your knees. Plus, feeling your lips around him pushes him closer to cumming in your mouth.
Bondeg kink, handcuffs, his ties, belts, he'll tie you up with anything if your comfortable with it.
There's also a tone of jealous sex. If he sees Alex shamelessly flirting with you expected to be tied to bed as fucks your brains out. If he sees Jackson touch you in a way thats reserved only for him you’re pinned against the wall.
There has been a couple of times Derek has walked in on you while you both are getting it on in one of the on-call rooms, it's safe to day Derek has lernd to knock.
“Mark, he literally saw it” you gasped from under mark.
He kissed your neck. “I was too busy to notice”
This man is amazing when it comes to aftercare. He knows exactly what you need. After your both cleaned up, he'll pull you to his chest to cuddle.
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writeonwhiskey · 2 months
Text
the skz house: ch 23 (chan pov)
a/n: thank you @bahablastplz for editing! i really loved writing from chan's pov. i hope you all enjoy this one!!
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[ read chapter 22 here ]
Chapter Twenty-Three: Of You
You haven’t spoken to me in days.
A few months ago, this wouldn’t have bothered me at all. I would have been fine with it. I would have preferred it. Here I am now, silently pleading with you at the table to look at me. But you don’t. And it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said those things to you the other night. I shouldn’t have fucked you like that.
Seeing you hurt as a direct result of my actions has never been easy to accept. In the beginning I brushed it off as being necessary. After you bulldozed through the walls I had up, though, it felt impossible to reassemble them. I’m Humpty fucking Dumpty over here.  
Should I have sent you away when you showed up at our house? Lee Know was in charge of the applicants, so I was floored seeing you walk in behind Seungmin that day. If I’d seen you amongst the candidates beforehand, I would have rejected it...maybe. I would have at least been able to spare you of the bullshit I put you through then, and again now. It’s unfair to you. I know it is.
But once you were here, I didn’t want you to leave. I pushed you away because I needed you to make the choice to go—I’m too selfish when it comes to you, I learned that quickly. I’ve never felt this way about anything before and I honestly don’t know how to cope with it. I feel whole when I’m with you in general, I feel invincible when I’m fucking you…how can this possibly be wrong?
Now I’m left hanging on to the tiniest of threads that connect us and I’m trying not to cling too hard for fear that it will snap from all the weight I bear in this. The thought of losing you terrifies me. And I know it’s inevitable.
I attempt to talk to you after dinner when I see you in the hallway. I want to apologize for my actions, but you cut me off.
“Don’t be. You’re right. We should want to do this and I’m going to give it a try.”
I feel consumed with rage at your words. I want to lash out and scream or punch a hole through the goddamn wall. But I don’t. I let you go.
I have to let you go.  
On Sunday when you come to my room to grab your sheets, you don’t say anything. I deserve it though, don’t I? If I hadn’t taken that trip with you my father wouldn’t have grown suspicious. I wouldn’t have to give you up for the next two weeks when I already have so little time left with you. If I hadn’t opened up to you, this wouldn’t be so hard on both of us. And on top of all that, I’m the one who told you we should be open to this first. I’m reaping what I’ve sown.
Allie comes in a little while later to put her sheets on your bed. The sight of them there doesn’t look right. Neither does she.
I watch as she moves around my room, oblivious to my mood and making small talk. I’m responsive…I think.  I will myself to feel some kind of emotion while looking at her—even if it’s just lust. She’s pretty, I could be attracted to her. If I call her over to my bed right now, she’d come. I could fuck her…but I don’t want to.
My ears perk up when she says she wants to spend the first night with me. As much as I want to object, I don’t. I can’t, really.
After dinner, I quickly shower and get into my own bed with the lights off before she returns. I can’t fall asleep, though. I’m thinking about you. Who are you staying with tonight? Are you sleeping in their bed?
I’m still wide awake when she comes back in, wearing just a towel. I can’t even be bothered to take a gander.
It disturbs me.
She shouldn’t be here. 
“Chan? Are you asleep?” she calls out into the darkness.
I remain silent and still. I hear her change into her pajamas and climb in her—your—bed, and finally feel relaxed enough to actually try falling asleep.
She stays with Hyunjin for the next three days and it feels like a relief. I’d rather be alone. But…being alone, with my thoughts does little to help me. I can’t stop thinking about you. What are you doing? Is Seungmin being good to you?
As fucked up as my mental and emotional state are, on Jeongin’s birthday I can’t keep being a recluse. He’ll be offended if I don’t show up for a little while, at least. So, I join the others in the basement for drinks and karaoke. Drinking to drown my sorrows is not something I enjoy, but tonight I want to. Especially since Allie will be in my room. I don’t want to do anything I might regret—but have you?
I’m one drink deep by the time you come in with Changbin. You seem happy. He offers to get you a drink, which I don’t mind. Then he calls you his girl. Which I do mind.
At that, I finish what’s left in my cup and give myself another heavy-handed pour of whiskey to replenish it. Have you fucked him? I wonder. The thought makes me feel sick to my stomach. I can’t help but feel selfish. In this fucked up situation, I know none of these guys would do anything to intentionally harm you. I know you’re in good hands, but…fuck. I don’t want anyone else on this entire planet to have you.
As the night carries on, everyone’s having a good time and I’m sulking in the corner like a toddler that’s been forced to share his favorite toy. I don’t know how else to feel right now. I am used to seeing you be flirtatious with Hyunjin. Seeing you cuddled up to Changbin on the couch, though, makes me want to snatch you away from him and claim you in front of everyone. But I can’t.
I can’t even be mad at him. He means well. And when he gets up to perform, I’m left smiling at his antics. I couldn’t seriously hate any of them, even if you are involved. I’ve known them for too long. These are my brothers. At the end of everything, they’re the ones who will be with me the rest of my life. Not you.
“Chan-hyung!”
I’m ripped form my confuddled thoughts when Jeongin says my name. I immediately shake my head—I’m not in the mood.
“For my birthday,” he adds. “Stop being boring and old.”
I frown at that.
Then Lee Know is marching towards me, grabbing me by the arm, and pulling me to the other room. I don’t put up too much of a fight—I’m old and boring, after all.
“For your birthday,” I look pointedly at Jeongin to which he beams back at me. “What do you wanna hear?”
“That new song you were finishing up last week,” he says.
“No, not that,” I shake my head.
For my music production minor, I’ve been spending more time in the studio than usual. There’s no better way to get my feelings and frustrations out than through music. Tortured artist and all that.
“Yes, that. It’s my birthday.”
He’s really milking this birthday thing. He connects his phone to the speaker, and I silently curse myself for having sent him the song. Everything I’ve done lately has come back to slap me in the face.
The melody starts to play, and I let out a sigh, trying to shake my troublesome thoughts and get into performance mode. I turn to face the TV; I can’t look at you while I sing this.
“Got so many questions, you seek information. No need to be desperate, we’re just getting started.”
I started writing this song before we even took our trip, but only just booked the studio time to record it. The lyrics cut deeper now than when I originally wrote them. They reveal the way I’ve felt about you. The way I still feel about you.
This is bad, isn’t it?
Do you hate it?
Are you repulsed after the way I treated you?
As I continue singing, I turn around to face everyone. My eyes find you first. You seem taken aback—it’s understandable.
“Locked in sight, we’re in trouble. A lock and a key making rumbles. I know you want me, don’t crumble.”
I avert my gaze before the next lyrics. Looking at you and singing them will make me crumble. But I mean every single word. I never thought I’d meet someone that feels so perfect for me. Why did it have to be like this?
When the song is over, I pass the mic to Rhiannon and retreat back to the bar. You’re performing now. You’re smiling and happy…all the things I wish I could make you. But I can’t. I’m not allowed to. Not for real anyways.
My eyes are so focused on you that I don’t notice Allie until she’s snapping her fingers in front of my face.
“Earth to Chan—you okay?” she places a hand on my shoulder.
“I’m good,” I say, sitting up straight and drinking from my cup.
She’s standing between my legs. Again, I will myself to feel something…anything. Maybe not unbridled attraction, but at least a desire to fuck her. It doesn’t happen. I raise a hand to her waist to test it out, but it doesn’t feel right. I could kiss her right now, get it over with.
“I have class at 8 so I’m gonna head up. You coming?”
I shrug, dropping my hand from her waist.
“Come on,” she says, sliding her hand down my arm to my wrist.
I let her pull me off the chair and up the stairs with her. I guess I could go to my room with her. I probably should.
So, I do. I follow her up the steps, her hand still holding my wrist. We get to my room, and she shuts the door behind us.
“I’m gonna shower first,” I say, in hopes the steam will clear my mind up.
She releases my wrist and I retreat to my bathroom.
I should fuck her. I really should. Even though I don’t feel physically attracted to her, I can think of you to make my dick hard. Then I can fuck her and get you out of my head. I can end this turmoil.
The shower does little to make me feel better. Nothing can make me feel better.
Except you.
I spend far longer than necessary in there and when I get out, I’ve lost all conviction to sleep with her. As I re-enter my room, I’m hoping and praying that she has fallen asleep.
She hasn’t.
“Get some rest…I’m gonna go make a snack.”
“I can make you something,” she offers, pushing the sheets back.
“No, it’s okay—thank you, though. Go to sleep.”
She nods and pulls the blankets back over her.
Downstairs, I sit down on the couch and turn the TV on. I’m not even hungry. I just didn’t want to be in my room with her. I’ve never felt so hung up on someone before, it leaves me at a loss of what to do. If I fuck her, it would only be to help myself move on from you. I’m just not convinced it would work. And I’d hate myself after for it. But have you already moved on? The thought keeps plaguing me.
I remain in place, rooted to the couch, as the others start to file out of the basement. First Han and Charlotte, then Lee Know, then comes Changbin…and you.
He’s drunk. He has one arm slung over your shoulder, and both of yours are wrapped around his waist to support him. You help him up the stairs without so much as a glance in my direction. What are you going to do up there? I want to go up there after you, but I can’t.
The sounds coming from the TV start to annoy me. I mute it and stare blankly at the moving images. I don’t know how much time passes in silence. My attention is drawn to the stairs at the sound of footsteps coming down.
It’s you.
You immediately look away from me and proceed into the kitchen. I shouldn’t follow you. But I’m up and off the couch before I can stop myself. I’m drawn to wherever you are. I’m a magnet and you’re my true north.
With every step I take towards you the voice in my head—my father’s voice—is telling me to stop and turn around and I hate it. I hate that voice. I hate that it wants to steal the one piece of unadulterated happiness I’ve felt in years. You feel like bliss. You feel like hope.
He threatened to make you leave. I swear to God I nearly fucking broke right then and there. He can yell and berate me all he wants, but to threaten to take you away before our time is up? Out of the question. I put up a front, acted nonchalant about you.
‘She doesn’t mean anything, Appa.’
 Lie.
You mean everything.
When I enter the kitchen, you’re grabbing water bottles from the pantry. I don’t have a plan, but I know I need to be near you, so I walk over to the pantry and wait for you to turn around.
The second your eyes land on me, all traces of feeling confused and lost leave my body. I’m found. My body is filled with the purest warmth, and I have to touch you to get more of it. I have to have you. You avert your eyes to the water bottles in your hand and I feel a pain in my chest.
“Why are you doing this to me?” I ask, placing a hand on your waist and pulling you towards me.
It’s an unfair question. You don’t know this inward battle I’ve been fighting since you showed up here. But I don’t know what else to say. It’s less of a question and more of a plea, really.
“I’m not doing anything,” you say softly. “I’m just…existing.”
“That’s all it takes, honestly,” I reply.  
“Chan,” you whisper, shaking your head, eyes still on the water bottles.
You won’t look up at me. Why won’t you look at me? I need you to look at me.
I take a few steps back from the pantry and bring you with me. This is the most I’ve touched you in a week. I’m not letting you go. I hold your waist with one hand and use the other to grab the water bottles, two by two, from your hand and set them on the counter before returning my attention to you.
“I feel like I’m in shambles when I’m away from you,” I admit, hooking a finger under your chin, forcing you to look up at me.
“You’re drunk,” you say, trying to push me away.
I hold on to you tighter, standing my ground.
“I miss you.”
You close your eyes and sigh, shaking your head again. You don’t believe me?
“You can’t.”
“But I do.” I say, bending down to nuzzle my face into your neck.
If you push me away again, I’ll take that as a sign. If you’ve made up your mind, I’ll have to live with it.
I wait for it, but it doesn’t happen.
Instead, you wrap your arms around my neck and pull me closer to you. I take in a deep breath and feel the stars align as the familiar smell of your skin ensnares my senses.
My hand leaves your waist and trails up your back, into your hair. I grab a handful of it and tug back on it. You look up at me with those soft fucking doe eyes that make my insides melt. The complete and utter trust you have in me. I can see it.
I smash my lips against yours, maybe too hard, but I don’t care. I want you. I fucking miss you.
You don’t hesitate to kiss me back, just as passionately. Do you miss me too?
I grab you by the waist and hoist you up on the counter as we kiss. My hands fumble at the waistband of your pajama bottoms. I want you so bad. Why am I nervous? And then, you’re helping me, leaning back and lifting your hips to push them down. I pull them off and toss them on the floor beside us. I scoot you to the edge of the counter and lower myself to my knees.
You tangle your hands in my hair as I rub my nose along your slit, inhaling my favorite scent. You smell so good, baby girl. I use my tongue on you next, needing to have you with all my senses. You throw your head back and let out a quiet whimper as I continue to fill myself with what I’ve been deprived of. What I don’t want to go without.
You.
My hands grip your thighs and as I’m licking, lapping, fucking you with my tongue, the emotions I so desperately willed myself to experience earlier surface. And I know then. I know I’m done for. How can I willingly give this up?
I stand from my knees and pull you off the counter, covering your mouth with mine again.
Do you like the way you taste on me? Your moan says yes.
“My cock throbs every time I see you, y/n,” I tell you, breaking the kiss as I turn you around, groping your breasts over your t-shirt. Your head falls back against my shoulder and litter the side of your neck with kisses. I pull you against me and press my hips against yours. I want you to feel how hard I am. How hard you make me. I could come in my pants right now, without even fucking you.
I’m helpless when it comes to you. Can’t you see that?
“Tell me to stop,” I plead, resting my cheek on yours and thrusting my hips against you again.
You shake your head and lean over on the counter, poking your ass out at me. You’re such a good fucking girl. I slap your ass with the palm of my hand, watching as it jiggles in the dimly lit kitchen. I grab a hand full of it, squeezing tightly.
I push my shorts and boxers down and grab my cock with one hand, holding your hips steady with the other. I rub my cock up and down your slit, groaning at how wet you are. Your pussy is always so wet and ready for me. Do you need me just as much as I need you?
“Every time before I fuck you,” I say, teasing your opening as you moan, “I tell myself I can live without it.”
I ease myself inside of you and we both let out the biggest sigh of relief at the same time.
“But I can’t,” I continue, slowly withdrawing. “I fucking can’t.”
I thrust myself back inside of you with as much force as I can and all hell breaks loose.
I realize the precarious situation we’re in. In the kitchen. But I could not care any less. My cock is home inside of you. This is where I’m supposed to be. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.  
I keep thrusting into you and you fuck me back. You want me just as much as I want you, don’t you? But do you need me like I need you? I can’t ask you that, so I just fuck you harder instead. It’s not healthy to communicate this way, but I can’t bring myself to say these desperate words to you. You take each thrust of my hips without running away and I love it. I fucking love—
No. No. I can’t.
The sound of your hushed moans, combined with the knowledge that we could be caught at any second, have all of my nerves standing at attention. You grip the edges of the counter as I grip your waist, pulling you back against me as hard as I can.
Mine.
Right now, I don’t care if you’ve fucked Seungmin or Changbin or both. They can’t hold a candle to what we have when we’re together like this. That much I’m certain of.
You’re mine, y/n.
You stand on your tiptoes and arch your back. I grit my teeth, and squeeze my eyes shut, trying to shake off my release. I need more. But even with my eyes closed, I can picture how you look in front of me. I have every curve of your body memorized; do you know that? The dimples on your back that I love pressing my thumbs into when I grip your hips. The thought makes me growl as I pummel into you harder and faster.
You’re perfect. I need you to know that. With every thrust, every grunt, every moan. I need you to know.
“Chan,” I hear you say and my eyes snap open.
I see your hand buried between your legs, rubbing your clit and working yourself to an orgasm.
Yes. Please, baby girl. Come on my cock.
I feel your pussy, my pussy, clench around my cock as your legs start to shake and I let myself go too; thrusting into you with reckless abandon as I come.
I’m convinced there’s no better feeling in the world.
I’m glad you stayed.
I’m glad I didn’t see your name on the list before you showed up.
Your legs continue to quiver as I lay myself across your back, leaving my cock inside of you.
I don’t want to move.
I don’t want you to leave me.
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[ read chapter 24 here ]
a/n: HOW ARE WE FEELING, MY LOVES? poor baby chan is stuck between a rock and a (constantly) hard place. i am so so so excited to hear your thoughts.
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hahaifolded · 14 days
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141 x POC!GN Intelligence Operative - Ending Things (Long Drabble) Author's Note: Oh this one hurt to write. And I'm not gonna lie - it's going to keep getting worse from here Warnings: MDNI, Angst
After that one night you over did it at the bar, you woke up, hungover and worried that you had done something stupid in front of the 141. But it seemed like things were fine as everything went on as usual the next few weeks. If anything you assumed something happened between them as you sensed some weird tension among them. But you weren't worried, they're the 141. They'll figure it out.
And it seems like they did after that random meeting in Price's office. But as they returned to normal, your relationship with everyone shifted.
It's like these last few months of camaraderie just disappeared. No more "good mornings", "how are you", "any plans tonight" - nothing of the sort. Instead, it's just commands, orders, and the occasional question about intel and reports, but overall nothing too comfortable. Confused by the sudden switch up, you decide to reach out first and figure out what happened.
If you had done something, then the least they can do is be mature about it and tell you. Because that's what teams do.
So with some recently dropped intel, you knock on Soap's door. After hearing him say enter, you walk in and take note of how the sergeant faltered, surprised to see you in his office.
"Hey Johnny-boy, I was wondering if you could help me go through some files we just got?" This was y'all's thing. He's never turned you down before so in your mind, this was foolproof. Or at least, you thought it was.
"If you can't handle some measly reports, you should probably re-evaluate your career choices. I can't always hold your hand when things get hard. I got my own work to do, you know?," he says, eyes still on his paperwork. Annoyance clear in his voice.
Your mouth runs dry. You try to save face and explain that you just value his insight on things. Your face heats up when he looks at you with the most unimpressed eyes. You apologize for wasting his time and quickly leave his office, feeling embarrassed by the interaction.
What you don't see is the way the Scotsman winced when he sees his door close, knowing that you left feeling like a fool.
Things with Soap did not go well, but you try not to dwell too much on his words. You knew that he had his days so if anything, you probably just picked a bad one.
So that's why you approach Kyle next as he always kept his cool when things were rough. If you anyone would listen to you, it would be Kyle. So the next day, you head to his office, lunch in hand, excited to catch up with the sergeant.
Seeing his door open, you stop at the entrance and knock on the door frame. He glances up and asks if you needed anything.
"No, just wanted to check up on you. Maybe see if you had any ideas you wanted to work through before the meeting," you chirp, eyes beaming with joy. Kyle usually workshopped his ideas with you before suggesting them to the team. But it's been awhile. He's probably been busy with reports and all that.
"With you? Not really."
"Oh, I just thought, you know since you usually--"
"Yeah, I know, but honestly what's the point? You've never been out in the field so what would you know?" He shrugs with that last phrase.
While he had somewhat of a point, that didn't mean you were completely useless. The last few months should speak on that. You try to push back, but he doesn't bother to look at you. Realizing he wasn't going to listen, you leave.
But, Gaz does listen. He hears how your steps get further and further away until he hears the distinct sound of your office door closing.
Okay, things weren't looking great. But if there was one constant in your life, it was Ghost. Despite his prickly exterior, you knew he was a softie at heart.
So you look for him at the base's gym, instead of his office, knowing that he was probably getting some reps in during his break. And just like you predicted, you found Ghost at the bench press with some rookies that liked to test your boundaries. But with Ghost nearby, you knew you'd be safe. Now with a gift in hand, you stand in front of the Lieutenant and wait for him to finish.
After a few minutes, he sits up and questions your presence, adding that he didn't think pencil pushers like yourself went to the gym. Ouch, that was uncalled for, but this was part of his shtick... right?
"Good to see you too, Ghost" you quip. He doesn't react. You falter a bit, but you quickly regained your composure. This was Ghost who you were talking to, he wouldn't hurt you. "Remember the other day when you were complaining about the calluses on your hands? Well, I got you some new gloves to see if they could help," you proudly announce as you drop the bag in his lap.
He carefully opens the bag and takes out the gloves. This had to do it. He's probably going to say thank you, maybe even ask you how you been. And that's your way in.
Or it would have been if the sound of fabric tearing didn't fill the air. Right before your eyes, Ghost was tearing a glove right through the middle. He stands up and towers over you, throwing your gift to the ground.
"Honestly if you spent even half of this energy in your actual work, maybe you'd be worth keeping," he spits. You hear the nearby rookies snicker. After staring you down for a few more seconds, he lays back down and starts another set. You don't bother saying anything as the lump in your throat threatens to give you away. You walk out of the gym, shame filling your core.
But with tears blurring your eyes, you fail to notice Ghost quickly grabbing the gloves off the floor.
And now with three failed attempts in figuring out what's wrong, Price calls you into his office for a check-in. During these check-ins, he'd ask you if everything was going well with the team. You really wanted to avoid inconveniencing him with such a trivial matter, but the other three left you with no choice.
You walk into his office, determined for answers. Or at least, were until he asked you to close the door behind him, an action only reserved for when the conversation was serious. After shutting the door, you take a seat, nervous as his usually friendly eyes aren't there to greet you.
With a cold gaze, Price looks you over and begins. "Look, I'm not going to beat around the bush here. Your work on the team has been decent at best." Decent? "It's clear that you're more interested in harassing my men than working alongside them." Harassing? "So if you're actually serious about your future here, I'd recommend you get your priorities straight. Do I make myself clear?"
You sat there dumbfounded. How did you get here? Just a few weeks ago, you were confident in your place on the team, and now you're at risk of losing everything you worked for. How? What caused this sudden-- oh.
The night at the bar. The night you can't remember. You probably crossed a line and despite their best efforts to ignore it, they just couldn't. Whatever you did, it must have been bad, because why else would they switch up on you like this? You obviously messed up.
That's why at the next team meeting, you ask Price if you could say a couple of words. Realizing the second chance they were gifting you, you decide to apologize for your inadequacies, for ever making them uncomfortable, and for overall failing them as a teammate when they never once failed you. With that, you promise to do better from here on out.
You leave that meeting determined to prove yourself once again to the team. While Johnny, Kyle, Ghost, and Price leave feeling horrible for making you feel like the monster here.
But that's what best for the team... right?
Word Count: 1371
More Thoughts - Next Thought
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bitchimasnake-sss · 11 months
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unwinding after a long day ft. r.zoro!
in which, after a long day, he comes right back to you <3
ft. zoro x fem!reader
set-up: its been a tiring day for him, good thing you're right here to offer your services (wink wink)
warnings: both sfw/nsfw headcanons for this dumbass; nsfw stuff includes penetration, cowgirl, just him being a smexy mf aah <3; MDNI (thankyou so much)
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sfw!!
- the amount of training this guy does actually scares me to death - like nice arms babe but please calm down. please. - so anyways, after a long day of training and sleeping and training and more sleeping and fighting off random pirate fleets, this fine specimen is bound to be tired - i am not kidding when i say he just wants to fall asleep like a log - "zo, you sleep like 10 hours a day" you pout as he lays down on your shared bed, already drifting into a sound slumber "i would like to sleep for 10 more" he grumbles, putting his hand over his eyes. - you are now wondering if maybe chopper should check him up, cause there's no way this man is fr - but let me tell you no matter how fucking sleepy he is, if you're talking about something (no matter how nonsensical), he will stay up and listen to it all - his eyes are closed, his chest rising and lowering in a repetitive symphony and you stop mid-sentence, realizing that he must be asleep "and what happened next?" his voice is nonchalant, as if there was no reason for you to stop talking "i thought you- were asleep" you mumble "bullshit." he glances at you, ignoring your bright grin, "finish up, now. i can't stay up the whole night, can i?" - so now you both have come a meticulous pre-arrangement. - you both would stumble through the door, legs heavy and eyelids heavier - his head is on your chest as he lays on top of you (how is he not crushing you? idk. if i knew that much physics id do something else than writing fanfics, stop attacking me) - as i said, his head is on your chest, one of his hand intertwining with yours. your fingers run through his scalp, slowly massaging as you recount your day for him "and then, nami told sanji that he needs a haircut and he got offended" "hm?" zoro's eyes are trained on your face and for a second you wonder if the pink dusting your cheeks is evident under the pale moonlight - it must be because he presses a chaste kiss to your knuckles and then closes his eyes with a low hum - you've decided this zoro, the one who's too tired to put up with his stoic demeanor is your favourite - because only you get to see him - his soft smiles as he pulls you closer to him, his annoyed sigh when you get too hot and push him away (he will pull you back like 2 seconds later, so it was of no use anyways), his droopy eyes as he struggles to stay awake and decided to kiss you to shut you up and falls asleep a second later - ugh we are all hoes for soft zoro 🥱🥱
nsfw!!
- on a few ocassional nights, his hand will skim over your tits, lightly running over your hardening nipples and then trace downwards to your waist "chopper was so confu-" your breath hitches, "zo- zoro?" he hums, fingers hiking up your shirt slowly, "keep talkin'" - and so you keep talking while he continues his administrations - his calloused fingers are tugging on your hardened nipple as his lightly runs his tongue over the other. his touch is fleeting, it comes and goes in waves and you're having a hard time keeping your thoughts straight - he looks up at you, "i said keep talking, didn't i?" - then he's flipping you over so that he's on his back and you're on top of him - and he's kissing your neck, breathing against your neck as he makes you sit on his thigh, you can feel his muscles under your core hot - you're rutting on his thigh, desperately aching for some satisfaction from the layers of clothes that separate you two - "zoro" you whine, "i- you. i need you." you undo his pants, stroking his dick as it comes into view - his calloused touch is pulling you downwards and he watches with a strange amusement as his dick stretches you open, disappearing into you with a practiced ease - "mhm, feel good?" his hands are still on your waist, bouncing you up and down on his dick. his hand grabs ahold of your face, squishing your face into a forced pout, "answer me, baby." - "ngh- yes, yes, fuuc- k fuck-" you nod feverishly, your own hand playing with your tits, giving it the attention he refused to give you - at one point he removes his hands and tucks them behind his head, watching mesmerized as breasts move up and down with each shallow thrust, how your ass slapped against his skin when you came down and how your head was thrown back as sweat dripped off your collarbone - "fu-" he groans, turning you around again so that your back is against the bed again - he's fucking in and out of you, dick slipping out accidentally because of the slickness "fuck, do you see how wet you are?" "zoroo~ please, please-" "that's right, keep moaning my fuckin' name like that" he's pushing it back in, resuming his cruel pace - "inside. im gon' cum inside, okay?" you nod, head thrown back from the feeling of having your walls stretched out and fucked into - he collapses on top of you, breathing into the cranny of your neck, "that was so good, baby" - you fell asleep with sweat clinging onto your body and a sticky, hot fluid seeping out onto your thigh - he can get you cleaned up in the morning (after another round or two ig?)
a/n: well... that was long, hope you enjoyed lmao
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broken trust. [part 4] l Joel Miller
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Summary:  you used to be very close, but he broke your heart, now your paths have crossed again
Warnings:  angst, swearing, mentioning about death, a few infected, violence (only a little anger poured out on him), crying, guns
A/N: I have a few words for you. First, I wanted to thank you very much, because every feedback is very important and constructive to me. Second, this part caused me some problems, I hope you will be gentle with me. I read so many fantastic stories from such incredibly talented people at that time, that I couldn't look positive at what I was writing. So my uncertainty is understandable. Third, I would like to write another part and I hope I will succeed, because I would like to end this story in a nice way. I will see what will come of it... Now, I hope you will spend a few nice minutes reading my scribbles. a few people mentioned tagging - @vickie5446 @dreamtofus @missladym1981 🖤 
[PART 3]
Why was it so hard? 
You felt guilty that you couldn't get back on track. You saw that Joel was trying to get closer to you, trying to fix that broken bridge between the two of you, but you knew that you were constantly tiptoeing around the biggest problem.
You felt betrayed.
When Joel Miller disappeared from your life, or rather you wrote yourself out of it, you didn't bother with him. You had to focus on yourself, on finding your place and the role you wanted to play in this world, without him. You pushed him to the back of your mind and moved on.
And now you saw him almost every day. Your heart ached every time you looked at him, when you heard that voice you knew so well. And you hated yourself even more when he made those little gestures that should have moved you. Because he cared about you, right?
For a few days, you had been pretending that things were good between you two, or maybe moderately good. After having a drink at the bar, you talked a few more times. Once Joel even visited you at the clinic and brought you:
"I thought of you." he said uncertainly, handing you a small, fresh loaf of bread wrapped in a cotton towel.
You both kept circling each other, keeping up all the appearances and pretending that everything was fine. And you felt everything inside you boiling.
And what should you have said? 
When Tommy asked who was going on the next patrol and you volunteered, Joel was right behind you. You were hoping that getting out of Jackson would give you a little time to clear your head, you didn't need that kind of company. But you didn't say a word, because what were you supposed to say... 
"You okay?" You nodded, packing your bag with water and something to eat.
“It's just a headache.”
You wanted to avoid looking directly at Joel, even though you knew he was watching you. In a strange way, his presence was making you more and more nervous.
You felt that all it would take was a spark to explode everything inside you. But you wanted to avoid it. There was nothing good about it.
The day was cold, although the weak sun was trying to break through the thick clouds. You took careful steps on the forest floor, trying to let your thoughts wander lazily. Joel was walking a dozen or so steps away from you. Sometimes you looked at him.
It was a strange feeling. You knew him. You knew every inch of his body. No one was as close to you as he was, no one knew what he knew about you. You trusted him then and in some way, you trusted him now. But everything between you was torn and you didn't know if there was any point in fixing it.
Joel raised his hand and you stopped, looking around carefully. He pointed out something in front of you, some movement, and after a moment you smiled at the sight of a deer with cubs. They moved uncertainly through the forest, but although neither of you moved, they must have sensed your presence, because after a moment, they ran away, startled. 
You didn't notice Joel approaching you, your gaze still wandering between the trees.
"You seem so absent." he said. "Because of me?"
"Sometimes." you replied, adjusting your bag a bit so as not to look at him again. "Or maybe I've just always been like this."
"You weren't like that. You know… I don't expect things to be like they used to be between us."
"Good. Because it never will be." you interrupted him. "Can we go now?"
"This is Y/N. She will lead you to this area." The old man pointed at you.
"Have you ever been there?"
You looked at the man who asked this question. He didn't say much from the beginning, but he justified everyone with his gaze. He gave the impression that he thought he was much better than you and it was no wonder that you didn't like him from the first moment.
"More times than you, for sure." You replied and pulled a map of the building out of your pocket.
"Is this the evacuation plan for the building?" he asked with interest and leaned over the table.
"Smartass." You mumbled and pointed to the locations you were interested in. "A few walls in this building have collapsed, but we can get through, although it's quite tight."
"And you can handle this?"
This man was getting annoying.
"You definitely won't get through." You replied. "That's why you need me."
"How many infected?"
"Less than in other places. If we do it quickly and quietly, they won't even notice us."
He folded his arms across his chest and looked at the map spread out on the table. The old man looked at you uncertainly, and you sighed.
"You don't have to marry me, just decide if you want me to take you there."
"You wanted someone to take you there, and I say - she will."the old man added, "I wouldn't risk it with anyone else if I were you."
The man finally nodded and extended his hand to you.
"Joel."
You shook his hand.
The room was dimly lit, and rubble was strewn across the floor. Joel held his gun at the ready, listening for any noise, but the building was quiet. A few minutes ago, you had slipped into the space between the collapsed wall and what used to be the door to the medicine warehouse.
No noises came from there either.
"Y/N?" he muttered quietly towards the crack where you had disappeared, "Y/N?"
Nothing, not a sound.
Shit!
"I wouldn't risk it with anyone else." he sneered at the old man's words, "Fuck! Y/N? Is everything okay?"
Suddenly, a bag fell out from between the collapsed walls and landed right at Joel's feet. Then he noticed your hand and the rest of you as you squeezed back in.
"I had to rummage through the shelves a bit." you said, picking up the bag and showing him its contents. "But I think I have everything. It's a real mess there."
"Have you started cleaning up?"
"A simple 'Thank you' would have sounded better." you snapped. "I got you some Viagra. Maybe it'll cheer you up."
You could see he wanted to say something, he even opened his mouth, but he just shook his head in disbelief and headed for the door.
You got to the ground floor and from there to the back exit. Everything was going perfectly. You could already see the door when suddenly an unexpected sound broke the silence. You looked at Joel, he must have kicked something metal.
"Fuck." you hissed when an unnatural noise echoed in the room next door.
Joel aimed his rifle at the door, and you quickly reached for your weapon. You started to head faster towards the door, but at that moment many things happened at once. The door on the other side opened and two clickers fell out.
You stopped, remembering that the noise could have directed them to you. You felt Joel's hand tighten on your wrist, he slowly headed for the exit. However, you didn't notice the glass on the floor and with the next step, the clickers rushed at you.
Joel aimed, but his rifle didn't fire.
"Fuck!"
The second monster rushed at you with a scream, but you didn't hesitate. You aimed and fired a few times. The noise echoed through the hall.
Joel kept trying to cock the rifle, cursing under his breath. You knew you couldn't leave him like that.
"That was stupid." he hissed again as you walked towards QZ.
You didn't answer. He repeated it every now and then like a kind of mantra. You managed to get out of the building, that was the most important thing, and you didn't see the point in going back to it.
"You said there were no infected there." he muttered, catching up to you.
"I said there were fewer of them than elsewhere. They must have come recently." you replied calmly.
"How many times have you been there before?"
"I don't know." you shrugged, "A few."
"Do you go there alone?"
You looked at him, surprised.
"What? Do you think I take guys there on dates? Don't be ridiculous." you snorted, "It's business."
"What you did was stupid." Joel growled again.
"If you think saving your life is stupid then do me a favor, go and get bit by one of them and I'll gladly shoot you in that pompous head!"
Joel didn't say anything, but he followed you. You impressed him, and that rarely happened.
"Would you like to have a drink with me?" he asked some time later as you sat down to look through what you had brought.
"Are you still going to be so grumpy?" you smiled.
Joel felt like an uninvited guest in your life, at least in the life you created for yourself after you left QZ. And although at first it seemed to him that you took your reunion really well, now he felt like you were thousands of miles away from him, even if it was just a few steps.
He could see your back, but it felt like your thoughts were echoing through the forest and hitting him straight. Your silence told him more than a thousand words that could have been said.
You were so lost in your head that even when Joel stopped for a while you didn't stop walking.
Did that mean he had lost you completely? Did he lose you when everything he had done came to light? Did he lose you because he only wanted you to be safe, because he didn't want to lose you? Did he ever really have you for himself?
You finally stopped and looked over your shoulder, searching for him with your eyes. God! Joel thought you looked like a wounded animal. And was he the predator?
He found you lying in bed, you smelled of cheap soap and were only wrapped in a towel. He immediately sensed that something was wrong. He knelt down by the bed and in the dim light he saw your reddened eyes.
"Baby, what's wrong?" he asked, pushing back the hair that stuck to your wet cheeks, "What happened?"
He stroked your arm and felt how cold you were.
"How long have you been lying there? You should get dressed, honey." he murmured with concern.
"I can't live like this anymore, Joel..." you whispered.
He looked at you, frowning, but didn't say anything, he didn't want to interrupt you. The words started pouring out of you along with a new flood of tears.
A few days ago you were at work, busy with your own things, but you noticed the new people who appeared in QZ. The guards were leading them to the quarantine area. These were normal procedures for every newcomer. You saw a family there, and a woman in advanced pregnancy.
You didn't care too much about it though. "Normal procedures" you repeated in your mind. But today everything was different. When you had your break you noticed a car carrying bodies. Normal procedures. But nothing about it was normal.
"I saw that woman, Joel..." you sobbed. "It was her. I'm sure of it."
You sat up in bed, completely devastated. Joel held his hands on your neck, he felt your heart rate increase, how you were gasping for breath.
"Maybe it wasn't her." he said uncertainly.
"I know what the fuck I saw!" you groaned "Her belly… the children that were with her... I thought it didn't affect me anymore, that I had seen enough..."
"Baby..."
"I can't forget about her. I came back home. I tore my skin in the shower for so long to wash it all off, but I can't."
Only then did he notice your reddened arms and hands. Joe felt something heavy sink into his stomach at the sight. He had never seen you like this before, so broken, so defenseless.
"You can't think about it." he began calmly. "You're safe here. With me. You know I won't let anything happen to you."
"Her husband must have promised her that too..."
These words hung between you. You were right, you knew it perfectly well. You had risked your lives so many times, but you were still here. Joel thought it was a perfect joke of fate. He didn't question it, though, because the most important thing now was you. He had someone to do all this for.
"I'll get you out of here, I promise." his voice was calm and soothing. "We'll find a way. We'll get out and I'll take you somewhere where you'll be happy."
"I'm happy with you, Joel..." you whispered, staring at him expectantly.
You were ready to accept any of his promises. You would take anything he gave you to feel better, a little more alive. And he gave it to you. Joel gave you the promise of freedom. It might not have been perfect, but it was yours. Just yours and his. The promise that one day you would get out and see more, live more. And be together, because you couldn't imagine any other life than with him.
"Fuck!"
You fell down feeling the small stones cut your hands. For a moment you wondered if you should just stay like that. You probably preferred lying in the middle of the forest with your knees bruised than having to stay stuck in all this.
But this pain was good, somehow. It took you away from all the dark thoughts circulating in your head and from the emotions swirling in your chest. For that one moment, when you were lying on the ground and smelled the forest, all you could hear was your heart beating, you forgot about everything.
And then it all came back with double the force.
"You okay? Here, let me help you." You looked at Joel's hand stretched out towards you. "You have to be more careful. There are a lot of roots here."
"I can handle it." You replied, supporting yourself with your hands and getting up yourself, but then you hissed in pain.
The stones dug deeper into your skin, cutting you even more. Despite everything, Joel grabbed your arm and helped you up, although you immediately moved away from him.
"Did you hurt yourself?" his voice was calm, as if he hadn't noticed your behavior. Or maybe he had and was trying to be gentle with you?
"It's fine." you mumbled, wiping your hands on your jacket. "It's nothing."
"Show me."
"No."
"Why do you have to be so fucking stubborn, Y/N?"
"And why do you have to be so fucking caring?" you blurted out.
Joel watched you carefully as if he was digesting your words, until he finally shrugged.
"I think you know why." he mumbled. "I care about you."
"Oh, really?" you scoffed.
You pulled a bottle of water out of your bag and tried to wash your hands. It wasn't easy, but when he tried to help you again, everything happened in a flash.
"Don't touch me." you snapped, stepping back. "I don't want you to touch me."
"I just want to help you." Joel raised his hands to show that he meant no harm. "You cut yourself, I can bandage it."
"I don't need your help, Joel! I was doing great before you showed up."
"Really? That's where you got that fresh scar on your side? After you were doing great?"
You were furious. You felt your entire skin burning, and Joel's presence only made it worse. You were standing in front of each other again, like when everything he did turned out to be true. You had kept it to yourself for so long that it had to explode.
"I can't look at you." Your voice was clear, though Joel heard you tremble with emotion. "I can't look at you when you try to pretend that nothing happened between us. That now everything will be like it used to be. You betrayed me, Joel. You told me to trust you, and you..."
"I'm sorry." he took a step towards you "You don't even know how much I regretted what I did. Every day, baby..."
"Don't call me that!" you interrupted him quickly.
He sighed and looked down.
"Ever since you left... I didn't think I'd see you again." he continued with a pained voice "Howard said you left town that same night. I didn't know where to look for you."
"Bullshit!" you snapped "Am I supposed to believe that you filled my head with this crap that we'd get out of QZ together, then you took it all away from me and suddenly you wanted to look for me?! Why?! Who was I to you, Joel?! I was just a stupid cunt who crawled to you every night hoping that she meant something to you..."
You couldn't know how much those words hurt him. You could call him anything, curse him, get mad and pull away from his touch, but when you degraded yourself to the role of an object. No, Joel couldn't stand that.
"You were everything, Y/N!" he roared angrily "Are you happy with this?! You were everything to me, and I didn't have the fucking courage to tell you! I was afraid I wouldn't survive if something happened to you. You hated QZ, but you were safe there! And could I provide that to you outside the walls? No!"
"I don't need your protection! I didn't need it before you showed up and I didn't need it after!" you walked up, pointing a finger at him "You were my partner! My lover! My fucking everything! I would have let myself be torn to pieces for you! And you stabbed me in the back! For what reason? Because of concern? Thank you very much!"
"I made a mistake, okay?! I understood it then, but I can't turn back time! What else do I have to do? How much do I have to apologize to you? Hit me if it helps you, I don't fucking care!"
You hit him in the chest with your clenched hand. You were probably surprised yourself, because you immediately withdrew your hand. Joel raised his eyebrows.
"Is that all you can do, babe? I know damn well that you can do it harder."
So you did it again, and again. And Joel didn't even flinch. He knew you had to get all your anger out at him. He saw your tearful eyes and how with each punch you lost your strength, until finally your knees buckled and you sat on the ground, crying loudly.
You reached your limits. You no longer had anything inside you but tears.
And then you felt him next to you again. He sat down. His strong arms wrapped around you, he let you snuggle up to him and just held you as you burst into tears.
[PART 5]
☆☆☆
Thank you for your time.
173 notes · View notes
daisymbin · 4 months
Text
please don't go - jeon wonwoo
warnings: none
pairings: jeon wonwoo x afab reader
genre: best friends to lovers, fluff, slight angst
a/n: lower case intended! also writing my first fic at 1am so.....
requests open!
check out my masterlist!
''how was your date?'' wonwoo asked the second the door opened to your shared apartment. not that wonwoo would ever admit it but it is currently 1:03am and he may or may not have stayed up to wait for you to return despite having had a very exhausting day himself.
''why are you still up? isn't it past your bed time?'' you asked as you removed your heels. 'i couldn't sleep.' he simply said. ''so? how was it?''
'it was alright i guess. it wasn't the best but it wasn't the worst either.'' sighing, you walked over to the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of water from the fridge before settling near the island of the kitchen.
truthfully, you didn't want to discuss the details with wonwoo. because aside from the fact that you're in love with your best friend, you've also been going on a few dates with mingyu now to try and get over your best friend. seungkwan had suggested setting you up with mingyu when you confided in him as he knew mingyu was interested in you. the only problem, however, is the fact that wonwoo seemed to not like mingyu. ever since the first time you went out with mingyu, wonwoo had no problem in letting you know how bad of an idea it was. saying mingyu was not your type, or that you both don't look good together; all these petty reasons that make no sense at all and you were slowly getting annoyed.
''are you hungry?'' you asked as you tried to change the topic.
''are you going to continue going out with him?''
''should we order some pizza?''
''mingyu isn't even your type, i don't know why him out of all people.''
''or should we order some pasta if you're not feeling pizza?''
''y/n.''
''or maybe i should cook us something? fried rice?''
''y/n can we please just talk about this?''
''do we still have any rice left?''
‘‘Y/N PLEASE!''
''what wonwoo?'' you said back harshly. it isn't until now that you realise how frustrated you are. trying to move on from him is so hard when he is around you all the time. it makes it even harder when he keeps being harsh about your dates and points out why each one of them isn't suitable for you, and the worst part of it all is that you know he's right, all of it. but what were you to do? there is no one who could ever come close to wonwoo.
''stop going out with mingyu! you don't even like him!''
''and how do you know that? maybe i do like him! maybe i like him a lot!'' you wanted to scream and shout to get all your feelings out..but this isn't your first fight with wonwoo about mingyu or any other guy you've been on dates with and you were just so worn out by now.
''that's bullshit and you know it. mingyu literally checks none of the boxes for your list of traits for your type.''
''i made that list 3 years ago! things change wonwoo! not all of us stay the same!''
its wonwoo who is silent now. his knuckles have turned paler than ever from gripping onto the edges of the island so hard.
''what the hell does that mean?''
''nothing.'' you said as you picked up your purse and head to your bedroom. you don't get to go far though, because wonwoo is holding onto your wrist now. so tightly yet so gentle at the same time. you wonder how that is possible. you hope he doesn't feel the pulse on your wrist picking up speed, and he hopes you don't feel his hand slightly trembling.
''please sweetheart...just..not him''
you sigh for the nth time tonight, ''wonwoo i can't just not date every guy you think isn't good enough or suitable enough for me. how am i ever going to find someone?''
''do you have to? do you have to find someone? i know you don't like mingyu enough so why?''
''really wonwoo? do i not like mingyu enough or do you just not like mingyu like how you don't like every single guy i've ever been on a date with? why? are you scared i'll call you less? replace you? have a new best friend? spend less time with you?'' your frustration was slowly growing again.
wonwoo feels his heart clench. can he tell you? will it ruin your 8 year long friendship? things are bound to become awkward, there's no way he can tell you how he truly feels.
but wonwoo decides, wonwoo finally decides that hiding his feelings from you for 5 long years is excruciating enough.
''none of that.'' he says so softly you can barely hear him.
''what?''
''i said, its none of that.''
''then what is it?''
wonwoo decides that if he is to get his heart broken by you, it might as well be tonight. he might as well just....try
wonwoo looks at you one last time for what feels like a good 10 minutes, even though it was only 10 seconds. he's contemplating, he's thinking and then.. he says fuck it.
his body moves faster than his brain. before he could properly process it, he finds his lips on yours. he feels you freeze for a split second, and then he feels you relaxing under his touch. he feels you kissing him back. he feels his heart beating so fast but also, he feels his heart slowly but surely unclench.
he pulls away softly and slowly. ''don't go out with mingyu anymore. don't go out with anyone else anymore. don't have dinner dates with anyone else. don't laugh at someone else's jokes that aren't funny just for the sake of being polite. i won't put you through all of that. i'll hold your hand. i'll have a pair of your converse in the car so your feet won't hurt from heels all day. i'll tell you jokes that are actually funny the way i know you like it. just let me love you and i'll show you all the ways i know how when it comes to you.''
you don't realise your tears slowly staining your cheeks, not until wonwoo's free hand comes up to wipe your tears with his thumb. its now your turn for your hand to reach out for wonwoo's wrist to pull him in for a kiss.
''please...please don't go''
''do you mean it?'' you asked softly
''i do. i love you, and i'll show you.''
and he does. now, he always holds your hand when you're walking on the street, crossing the road, lazing on the sofa, on the bed, on the table when you're waiting for your food to be served. he holds your hair back when you have to puke after having too much to drink. he removes your make up for you when you are too tired or too drunk. he never makes you wait, he always gives you the first bite of his food. he kisses you on the cheek, on the forehead, on your temples, the back of your hand, your fingers and on your lips, all while always telling you how much he loves you. he loves you in all the small and simple ways. but jeon wonwoo knows you love him too.
a/n: im not exactly satisfied with this because while proof reading it, it feels a bit rushed but i did start this at 1am and it is 4am now so this should do. please let me know what you think or if you have any requests! hopefully my first fic went okay hahaha
272 notes · View notes
cheezeybread · 3 months
Note
hihi! I saw your requests were open and was wondering if you'd do head cannons with any of the first years you want (romantic expt Ortho obvi) where the reader has natural wavy/curly hair (2C/3A) and always straightens it,but one day their straighter broke and they had to go to school with their natural hair?
HECK YEAH
As a curly-haired girlie myself, this just hits different <3
𝙁𝙩: 𝘼𝙘𝙚, 𝘿𝙚𝙪𝙘𝙚, 𝙅𝙖𝙘𝙠, 𝙊𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙤, 𝙎𝙚𝙗𝙚𝙠
I'm SoRrY I can't write Epel that well :(
𝘾𝙐𝙍𝙇𝙔 𝘿𝘼𝙔𝙎
●・○・●・○・●
𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐎𝐋𝐀
Literally doesn't even notice anything is different.
Maybe he'll have a feeling that something's off....but he can't quite figure out what....
You're gonna have to tell him straight-up, baby, he's about as thick in the head as they come. Ain't nothing getting in his brain.
Of course, once you tell him, Ace tries to play it off like he knew but was just waiting for YOU to be comfortable enough to share it with him.
God love him, he tries to hard to be cool.
But by golly, he absolutely LOVES this natural hair of yours now that he notices it
He's totally gonna think of reasons to drag you all over school grounds, just so everyone in the entire school can see you and your fancy-dancy hair!
Even if you tell him you don't think it's fancy-dancy, he does NOT agree and WILL keep calling it that.
The next day, when you come to classes with it straightened again, he's obviously gonna sulk about it a little bit...and after he overhears something about straightened hair losing its straight-ness when wet....he's gonna find a way to dump water on you so he can see your wavy hair again!
Which might be the wrong route, but he just loves you so much and can't get enough of your hair.
●~●~●~●~●
𝐃𝐄𝐔𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐀𝐃𝐄
"Ohhhh, my mom straightens her hair, too! Why not just leave it natural?"
He's well-versed with the world of hair-styling simply from his mother's own routines when she was younger.
Now that he knows your secret, he's totally gonna buy you hair supplies specifically FOR your natural hair...you know, he was just out shopping at the school store and came across this special cream that reduces frizziness, why don't you try it out??
Of course, if you tell him that you prefer to have it straightened (either for convenience, or because you're self-conscious about it), he'll do his best to support your decision, and he'll stop buying the wavy hair products.
Heck, he'll even try his hand at straightening your hair for you!
He'll burn his fingers a lot the first few tries (which he makes you "kiss the pain away". He's a bit cringe, but hey, he's your cringe), but soon enough, he'll be an expert with that sucker!
You now have a new hairstylist! Tadaaaa
●~●~●~●~●
𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐎𝐖𝐋
He's such a king, he notices right away what's up with your hair and gives you a nod of appreciation.
Jack may not be the best with words, especially not words of affection, but he's working on it for you! So expect some shy compliments of how nice you look!
You can even catch him whispering under his breath sometimes about how he "likes the look" and you should "wear it more often", but if you ask him to repeat what he said so you can hear it better, he'll get flustered and say something like "I SAID IT'S REALLY HOT OUT"
He's pretty chill about the whole thing, ngl. He doesn't try to pressure you to straighten it again nor leave it how it is, he just appreciates it whatever style it's in. The natural look, he's just considering it as a treat!
PLEASE start wearing your natural hairstyle around this poor man, because he's not going to ask you to do it, even though he reeeeeally wants you to.
Poor Jack just figures that you should do what you want- after all, it IS your hair.
Once he learns about straight + wetness = curly hair, expect some swim dates, and walks in the rain.
You've been warned
●~●~●~●~●
𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐎 𝐒𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐃
The poor little dude is trying so hard to figure out what's wrong with you at first
But then when he gets closer to you, he realizes that it's just your hair, in a different style!
He knows that people can curl their hair, straighten it, and do whatever they want to it, so why should he be so surprised?
More likely than not, he already knew your hair type was different from the straight hairstyle you wore everyday, simply from scanning you for injuries when he hangs out with you (Yes, he most definitely checks you over every time, he can't have his friend getting hurt and not do anything about it!)
Once you tell him your tale of woe regarding your hair straightener, Ortho lights up and offers to fix it for you! He also has a built-in mini hair-straightener (because he has everything else, why not!) and offers to straighten your hair right here, right now, if you want!
Truth be told, he likes any of your hairstyles, so wear whatever you want with pride!
●~●~●~●~●
𝐒𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐊 𝐙𝐈𝐆𝐕𝐎𝐋𝐓
Yells very loudly when he first sees you: "WITCH, THEY'RE A WITCH"
But then he realizes that they're all at a school for magic-users, and that you're the only one amongst them that DOESN'T actually have magic!
So he's just very confused as to how you changed you hair so suddenly.
When you tell him about your hair straightener breaking and how this is your natural kind of hair, he immediately wants to see the straightener.
He's so awestruck by this little device that's an over-glorified piece of hot iron.
"I WILL TAKE THIS MACHINE UNDER MY CHARGE", he loudly exclaims, taking your hair straightener and rushing back to the Diasomnia house.
He'll definitely get someone in Ignihyde to fix it (Or, rather, he'll get Lilia to go in his stead to get someone to fix it, but once it's all nice and working again, he's gonna use that sucker until it breaks again!
Everyone in Diasomnia walks around with badly-straightened hair. Half of the dorm member's hair is already straight, so Sebek tried to make it even STRAIGHTER.....there's a thick hair-burnt smell hanging around the dorm.
But yeah, you're not getting your straightener back after that. Besides, Sebek likes your wavy hair! It matches your personality a lot more, in his opinion ;)
●・○・●・○・●
170 notes · View notes
hyunniesgirl · 11 months
Note
oooh Slytherin!hyunjin gives amortentia to reader after she rejects him so many timesss and after the effect gone she found out and mad oooh angst angst idk happy ending hahahahhahahaa (sorry for my bad grammar)
So this ask got me super excited!!! I love writing fantasy so count me in, babes! Please ignore any mistakes since I stopped reading Harry Potter in the forth book and just settled for the movies lmao
Here are some spells used in the story that may be confusing for my sweeties that are not into harry potter:
¹Amortentia: it's the most powerful love potion, it can't reproduce real love and it comes with dangerous side effects like a powerful infatuation or obsession. It smells differently to each person, like the things(or people) the person who's feeling the scent likes.
²Cruciatus: a spell(curse) used to torture people.
I'm using this post to celebrate reaching 200 followers 🥳, thank you for those who like what I write and keep supporting me, I'll keep working hard to bring more nice stories for you!!
I wish you would
Pairing: Slytherin!Hyunjin x fem!reader
Genre: angst, fluff
Warnings: cursing
Word count: 5,120(I'm sorry about that not really I just got very inspired)
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Hyunjin is obsessed with you, everyone with eyes and ears knows that. He runs after you like a dog runs after its tail and you always try being nice, try rejecting him in a way to not hurt him but he doesn't seem to take a hint.
Your class just ended, you collect your books and walk to the corridor, feeling his eyes on you.
"What's it?" You ask, turning around to look at him. His green and black uniform matching perfectly with his blond hair. He seems taken aback with the sudden attention, since he's used to you ignoring him.
"I just wanted to give you this", he smiles, holding a paper bag to you, "Felix made brownies and I just thought you'd like a snack, I know you're studying a lot for exams"
You smile, you love brownies but you're not sure if you should accept it. It's been a day since you rejected Hyunjin… again. He doesn't seem bothered by it anymore, he just keeps coming on strong and at this point you already know it's just a trait of his personality to not give up easily. But it would seem inconsiderate to not accept, since he brought it just for you.
"Don't think too much", he shake the bag a little, "I'm just trying to look out for you"
You sigh, accepting the gift and thanking him. It's not going to kill you to be nice this one time.
After saying goodbye you head to the library, you're going to meet Seungmin to study. Your classes are not that difficult this semester, so you're just using your extra time to study for the bigger exams.
It's already past dinner time when you finish your studies, your friend gave up a few hours back and went to the dorms while you stayed to study a bit more.
You're hungry so you look at the paper bag Hyunjin gave you and look inside. The brownies have a nice scent of mint? Maybe Felix added some to the recipe.
One it's not enough, it's so good you end up eating the whole lot. Maybe you shouldn't have, you feel sick instantly after finishing it and the librarian comes running as soon as she looks at your face.
"Are you alright, darling? You look pale", she asks and you nod, maybe the exhaustion is finally hitting you.
You grab your things and walk towards the dormitories of your house, you feel your mouth dry and an empty feeling on your chest. What's going on? You look around, there's very little people in the hall since it's almost curfew time.
When you're crossing the courtyard, you see a shadow of someone hovering over and you stop in your tracks trying to discern who it is.
You tighten the hold on your wand while they get closer, only to breathe relieved seeing it's just Hyunjin.
"It's already late, you shouldn't be wandering around by yourself", he says.
"Oh, I-", you feel your cheeks warm suddenly, do you have a fever? Your hands are sweating too. "Can you help me?" You ask him, stretching your hand for him to hold, your heart beating fast to the thought of touching him. "I'm not feeling very well"
"Yeah?" He raises an eyebrow, surprised, but still takes a step closer to you, grabbing your arm with a hand and sliding his other to your waist, giving you support by embracing you entirely.
"Thanks, I don't know what came on to me", you mumble and you're not sure if he heard, until you feel him tightening the hold he has on you.
"It's okay, it's my pleasure", he whispers close to your ear and you shiver.
It's strange for you to have this kind of reaction, especially to Hyunjin. It's not that you don't like him perse, you just don't think about dating in general. You want to focus on your studies, do well on your exams and have a good career, it's your parents dream that became your dream.
His pursuit over you got boring after the fourth time you rejected him. It was fun in the beginning, he's Hwang Hyunjin after all: handsome, smart and rich, you felt special when he didn't care about all those people that would crawl after him, but would beg for just a single glance of yours. With time it started bothering you, though. It seemed like the more you rejected him, the more interested he would get.
Why did it bother you, though? It feels nice having him holding you right now, he smells like mint, his warmth is shielding you from the cold air and you think it's okay to have him by your side just for a moment.
You can't stop thinking about him, Hyunjin is the first thing in your mind when you open your eyes in the morning and the whole breakfast you spend looking for him around the great hall, thinking about what he'd like to eat and maybe if he would like to walk with you to your classes.
"Are you alright?" Seungmin's voice takes you out of your thoughts, you realize you're just staring at your food for some time now.
"Nothing", you smile slightly, "I just… do you know where Hyunjin is?"
Seungmin frowns, tilting his head to the side while analyzing you.
"Why would I know that? But most importantly, why do you want to know that?"
You sigh, going back to play with your food.
"I just miss him", you mumble, earning a gasp from your friend.
"Did you finally lose it?" He's staring at you with narrowed eyes, disgusted.
You sigh, looking around one more time and finally seeing Hyunjin entering the hall, he's talking to a girl. Who is she? Why is she smiling so much to him? Why is he smiling back at her?
Your body moves by itself, getting up and walking with heavy steps towards the entrance where Hyunjin is talking to that girl, he seems excited.
You don't like it.
"Excuse me?" You say, waiting for him to turn around. You have your arms crossed in front of your chest and a foot tapping impatiently on the floor.
He looks at you with a smile that almost makes you melt, almost. You get even angrier, did he smile like that to her too?
"Oh, y/n, what can I do for you?"
"Who is she?" You ask without even thinking, why does that matter?
"We have divination together", he answers simply, just like that, as if that was a good enough answer. He frowns in confusion when you don't say anything and keep just staring at him. "Hm, we were just talking about some crazy prophecy Trelawney came up with in the middle of our class yesterday", he finishes, hoping you're satisfied with his answer.
You take your eyes out of him, looking at the girl and lifting one eyebrow, she smiles sheepishly at you and say goodbye to Hyunjin, walking to her house's table.
"Why did you take so long?" You step closer to him, grabbing his hand and holding it with yours.
"I didn't know you were waiting", he answers, leaning closer to you with a smirk in his lips.
"Well, I'll be waiting from now on so you better get here quickly"
You turn around, facing the tables. People are staring and whispering, of course, you never gave the time of day to him, it's something unpredictable to see you being cozy.
You slide his arms over your shoulder, a message to every other person that he's yours now. You're not sure where this possessiveness is coming from but it's there and you have to make it clear.
Hyunjin didn't think the potion would actually work, he's not that good at potions. He's been trying to catch your attention for a very long time but you rejected him over and over. He could have anyone he wanted, just not you and that made him crazy in the beginning, he just wanted you more and more, he's very ambitious after all.
However, after some time, he realized his feelings were deeper than what you thought, even more than he thought.
He started noticing every little thing about you, how you frown when you concentrate too hard, how you make every little feeling of yours show in your face. How you always have to be right.
And how you didn't want anything to do with him.
He was in love with you. That made him desperate, he needed you and you kept turning him down.
So he took drastic measures, he's not sure it's the most ethical thing to do, but he's unquestionably cunning, so he would do anything to achieve his goal.
A week before he gave you the brownies, your potion's class learned how to brew amortentia and he knew he had to give it a try. He spent nights awake trying to make the perfect potion, strong enough for it to work instantly and last long enough for you to not fall out of love easily.
"Are you really going to use a love potion?" Felix asks while watching Hyunjin mix the liquid with the brownies batter.
"I need to", he answers.
"She's going to be pissed if she finds out, you know that, right?" Felix tries again, it's not easy to make Hyunjin give up when he sets his mind to something.
"At least she'll be looking at me", his answer takes Felix by surprise, he knows Hyunjin is in love with you but maybe he can't grasp the depth of his feelings.
Hyunjin decides to wait, he'll try one more time before using the charmed brownies. He sees you in the courtyard, reading. You look beautiful with your hair messed by the wind and your lips moving, pronouncing the words in the book.
"So", he starts, he always tries to be confident around you, even though every time you turn him down his self esteem takes a blow. "When are we going on that date?", he asks, sitting by your side and watching you lift your eyes out of the book to look at him.
"Hm, I don't know about that", you smile kindly. He thinks you're cute being so considerate and trying not to hurt his feelings. Maybe if you weren't so nice to him, he'd already have gotten over you.
"What do I have to do for your answer to be yes?" He asks, bending his upper body to look at your face since you're looking at the book on your lap now.
"Let's not, Hyunjin", you sigh, "you know it's always going to be no"
He swallows hard, he did wish you were harsher in your rejection but he didn't think it would hurt so much.
"I'm not going to give up", he gets up, winking at you, he's too proud to show how hurt he is. "I know you don't dislike me, so that's a win for me", he smiles at you, even though he feels like he's suffocating.
He knows your personality, if you hated the idea of him hitting on you so much, you would already have threatened to crucio him but you don't and it's not because you're too polite for that, he has seen you fight people for much less.
He goes back to the Slytherin's common room and sits in front of the fireplace. It's getting cold lately, you shouldn't stay outside so much and for so long.
He just wants you to look at him, he's sure if you just get to know him better you'll want to be with him, he'll make sure of it.
So he gives you the brownies even though he feels a bit guilty about it, it's to late to back down when he sees you already turning around the corner, heading to the library.
He's restless, not sure when you're going to eat the brownies or if you are going to actually do it, he tries playing a bit of quidditch with his friends and studying but he's too anxious to concentrate on anything other than you. So he stays close to the library, waiting for you to finish your things.
As soon as you walk by the courtyard he can tell you're sick, so he gets closer and helps you get to your common room. Did you actually ask for his help? That sounds like a dream to him, just the thought of being next to you is enough to make him the happiest person alive, feeling your warmth against his body was enough to make him melt. If you didn't need his support, he'd be laying on the floor.
After giving him a peek on the cheek and leaving him behind in the great hall, after breakfast he can feel a burning gaze and he knows exactly who it is from. Seungmin, your best friend.
You might be enchanted but he's not, and if Hyunjin doesn't give you more of the love potion, Seungmin is going to make you fall out of love, he's sure of it.
He brews more of the potion, putting it on another batch of brownies to give to you. And you love the gift, eating all of it while studying with Hyunjin in the library. You're not studying much actually, you're just looking at him and asking questions about him, what he likes to do, about his family and his friends. It's an entirely new world to have all your attention to himself, he loves it, loves to spend time with you. The longer he stays in your presence the more he's sure that he does love you, all of you.
You're feeling tired lately, you lost all the deadlines to your projects in the last two weeks and now you're having to pull all nighters to try and get them all ready before the end of the semester. You have been spending a lot of time with Hyunjin, all the time you're not in class revolves around him.
He has been giving you lots of brownies lately and you're actually getting sick of it but you don't want to be a killjoy and end up accepting it anyway, eating it when you're bored.
This was the last time you accepted it though, you're going to say that you don't want it from now on and maybe Seungmin can help you eat these ones. Your best friend is at the library, waiting for you. He's going to help you finish some details of your project.
"I brought this for you", you shake the paper bag, holding it out for him.
He opens it and looks inside.
"Why does it smells like wood?" He scowls.
"What are you talking about?" You laugh awkwardly, "it smells like mint"
He stares at you for a few seconds before gasping, his hand palming his mouth.
"That's what's wrong with you!" He gets up, throwing the paper bag in the trash and ignoring your 'hey!' in protest. "Did Hyunjin give this to you?" He asks.
"Yes, why?"
"For how long have you been eating these brownies? Did they smell like that since the first time?" He ignores your questions, he looks absolutely out of it.
"Yeah, he gave me the first one's like two weeks ago", you frown, trying to understand what he's trying to say.
"He's been giving you amortentia", he tells you, running his hand through his hair, "how did I not realize that sooner, you've been acting weird for a reason!"
You feel your heart sink, he's been doing what?
That's not possible, he would never do something like that. Right?
You gasp, looking back to the way you have been acting lately, did he really charm you? So none of the things you're feeling are really real?
You managed to stay away from him for so long and suddenly you couldn't think about anything but him, the reason was right under your nose, you can't believe you didn't notice the signs.
"How much time does it take for it to wear out?" You ask, not really remembering what the professor taught you.
"A few hours minimum, a day or two if it's strong enough", Seungmin answers, whatching you seat and look at your fingers. Your chest hurts.
"Can I stay with you tonight? The last batch he gave me was yesterday, I may be fine tomorrow morning", you want to cry, Seungmin recognizes that face. You're looking around trying to prevent the tears from falling and he wants to kill Hyunjin for that.
Seungmin has been your best friend since first year, he didn't think he would have so much in common with someone from your house, but you two just clicked. He knows you like Hyunjin but you're too focused on your future to actually see that. Every time he makes a move on you, you'll turn him down, but your friend can see your eyes lingering on his figure while he walks away, you keep looking until he disappears and then you sigh. Sometimes Seungmin even sees you giggling from something Hyunjin says and your eyes shine brighter in those moments, he's not sure how you didn't realize it yet.
After the hurt eases a bit, you start getting mad. You wake up in the morning and all you can think about is a way to murder Hwang Hyunjin. You can't believe he used you like that, like a fucking toy for him to play house with.
You see him in the corridor, he smiles looking at you and opens his arms, waiting for a hug with a big smile on his face. Disgusting, that's all you can think.
"My love"
You walk confidently to him, taking him by surprise by hitting him in the face with a mixture of punch and slap, doing the movement of a slap but hitting him with your closed fist. He bends down, touching his cheek and looking at you, betrayal in his eyes.
"You fucking asshole!" You're seeing red, you didn't think you'd feel so livid seeing him, you're so hurt, so angry.
"Babe?" He looks at you like you're the one in the wrong.
"Don't", you take a deep breath, looking around to try and ease your anger, "don't call me that. You used a fucking love potion on me? What kind of loser does that?"
He gasps, he didn't think you'd find out about it, not so soon. He was sure he could make you fall in love with him and later on he would tell you about what he did.
Hyunjin could have anyone, there are dozens of people falling on their knees for him, you just can't understand why it has to be you.
"Let me explain, yeah?" He tries, taking a step closer and trying to hold your hands but you step back, glaring even harder at him.
"Don't touch me" you say, gritting your teeth, "you're disgusting"
You turn around, seeing the amount of people looking at your fight with shocked expressions in their faces. Of course no one's going to believe he gave you a love potion, he doesn't need that, he's Hwang Hyunjin.
That makes you even angrier.
You walk fast away from there, you can't believe you have to go through this kind of thing and the worst part is, why does it hurt so much? The effects of the potion must have ended by now, then why do you feel like you can't breath? The tears run out of your eyes without your permission and the hiccups come naturally with the painful cries.
You feel tired, frustrated, overwhelmed but most of all you feel heartbroken. There's no more potion tempering with your feelings but you still feel a lot of different emotions you shouldn't be feeling. It's not possible that you really like him.
The right reaction is for you to curse him, feel mad about all he's done and hate him with all your being. But you're feeling hurt and you want to curse at him, obviously you're angry about what he's done, but you're worried about him too, maybe you were too harsh.
No.
You'll not let any feelings you have let him get away with manipulating you. If you really do like him you're just going to have to stop.
Hyunjin can't eat, can't sleep, can't study, in other words, he can't function properly. You don't speak to him, you don't look at him, you don't even aknowledge his existence.
You don't eat when he's in the great hall, you will sit in the fartest seat from him when you're in the same class and everytime he tries talking to you, your personal bodyguard, Seungmin, prevents him from doing it.
He can't live like this, Hyunjin feels like he's about to die at any moment and he just doesn't know what to do.
Felix is too nice to actually say it but he looks at Hyunjin with that 'I told you so' look and just watches again as his friend sits in his bed and spends minutes staring at nothing.
"Was it that bad?" He asks but he already knows the answer. The whole school is in uproar after you punched him in the middle of the corridor before classes started, so to say everyone knows about what happened it's an understatement.
"She's not even looking at me", Hyunjin says finally and Felix sighs, sitting by his side and patting his back.
"I think you should give her some time", Hyunjin scowls after hearing that, even though he knows his friend is probably right.
It hurts so much, even more than when you just ignored him. Because now that he felt your warmth, he can't live without it.
Since Seungmin met you, this is the first time he has to worry about you. Even when you pulled all-nighters studying or joined too many extracurricular activities, you always took care of yourself. This time though, you're not.
Your grades are back to normal and your projects are all ready a week before the deadline but at what cost? You are not sleeping properly, there are huge eyebags under your eyes and you lost weight, your hair is always a mess and your clothes are far from your usual tidy style. He knows you realized your feelings for Hyunjin and you're just trying to bury them without actually trying to understand them and he just doesn't know what to do to help you. Every time he tries talking about it, you'll brush it aside and tell him you're not in the mood for that.
The winter holidays come to you like a gift and a curse, you don't have lots of work to take care of so you can rest but you don't have lots of work to take care of so you don't have anything to distract yourself from your wandering thoughts, those ones that always end up on the same person.
You never thought it would be so hard to get over someone, in some way your brain probably knew that the moment you let someone walk past your walls it wouldn't be easy to undo the damage made. That's why you always run from Hyunjin, because it would be torturous to stay away from him after you let your feelings be known.
As the weeks go by, your anger subside a bit. You still can't forgive what he did but you miss him too much to still be mad. You were pretty confident in the first few weeks, concentrating all your energy in your classes and projects, trying to forget about him. However, the more time passed, the more you thought you actually liked him… way before the amortentia happened.
You two met each other in your first year, but you were children that didn't care about the opposite sex and it went like that till fifth year, when you two turned fifthteen and puberty just hit him like a truck over summer break. He came back taller, his voice changed a bit too and his facial expressions as a whole were sharper, more eye-catching than ever.
It wasn't different for Hyunjin, however you always caught his eye. When he was younger he thought you were cute for a girl and he has never been easy to impress. When you grew up you became so pretty he couldn't take his eyes out of you. That was the first time he ever asked someone out and the first time he was rejected, it really hurt his pride. And now, finishing your seventh year, it's the first time you're realizing that maybe he fell first but you fell harder.
The classes come back in the blink of an eye, you're not sure you're happy or sad about it since you don't know what to do with the whole Hyunjin situation.
It all gets worse when you see him in the corridor, he's looking around, fidgeting and you just know he's waiting for you.
You try walking past him, but he lifts his eyes as if he felt your presence and you see the corner of his mouth going downwards and his lips quivering.
"Can- can we talk?" He pleads, his voice shaking, it's too much for him to finally see you again, finally have you looking at him again.
You look down, trying to decide what to do and end up nodding, turning around and leading him to an empty classroom. He closes the door and watches as you wander around the class, brushing your fingers on the table's surface, avoiding looking at him.
"How are you?" He asks finally, after a few minutes of torturous, awkward silence.
"Just fine", you answer, looking at every piece of the room but not at him. You're afraid that if you look him in the eyes you're going to cave in and you just can't give in so easily.
"I'm having a really hard time", he tells you.
"Didn't ask", you stop in your tracks, annoyed with yourself because it hurts to be mean to him. "Let's get this over with", you manage to say, even though the ache in your chest is making it difficult to breathe.
He sighs, running his hands through his hair.
"I- I'm really sorry about what I did, y/n, can you please forgive me?" He begs and you finally turn around, trying to keep your cool, the anger is coming again and you feel your face hot.
"Are you asking me to forgive you for tampering with my feelings? Or for pulling this shit just because you're obsessed with something you can't have?"
He frowns, it's not like that, he knows that but clearly you don't.
"Y/N, I have wanted you all the same since the beginning. I can't have anyone else, not because I'm obsessed but because I'm in love with you", he takes a step towards you, "you make me feel alive, that's why I keep trying over and over again"
You're taken aback by the confession, so shocked you don't even notice how close he got to you in a few moments but you can't let him get away from this, not when your pride is involved.
"Do you think it's fair to make someone like you just because you like them? Would you ever have told me about what you did or would you keep me like a fucking toy until you were tired of playing with me?"
He stares at you for a moment, a desperate look on his face. He wasn't trying to hurt you. He was selfish, he knows that and you have the right to not want anything to do with him anymore, but he has to try earning you back.
"I know I shouldn't have gave you a love potion, I know it's wrong and I did know you wouldn't like having your feelings messed with", he takes one of your hands and puts it in his chest, right above his heart and for the first time since you found out about what he did, you don't want to pull your hand away from his touch. "I was going to tell you, I swear, I just wanted to make you really look at me and see it was worth giving me a chance", he smiles sadly, "you are right to hate me after what I did but if you do forgive me I swear that I'll make up for it every day of our lives and I'll make you happier than you ever thought could be possible. It's going to be my goal, my mission, the biggest of my ambitions"
You sigh, it hurts. Logically, you shouldn't forgive him. But love is not logical and you want to accept his proposal. You know it's dumb and you know it's risky but never in your life did you really make a choice that you wanted to. You had to be a good student so your teachers would like you, you had to behave so your family would be proud of you, you had to have good grades so your parents would be satisfied, because they told you you needed to have the greatest career and that became your dream, but you never stopped to think about what you really wanted.
"If you didn't use the potion, would you keep trying to win me over?" You whisper, trying to decide what answer to give him.
"Yes, probably forever. Until you threatened to kill me or married someone else", he smiles, "not going to assure you I wouldn't try stealing you from your partner, but that would hold me back a little", he chuckles.
You sigh, why must you like him so much?
"I swear I'll make you regret it if you ever use any magic on me again", you say through gritted teeth, glaring at him, "and I like the thing you said about making up for it our whole lives"
A big smile grows on his lips and you feel your cheeks getting hot, how can someone be this beautiful?
"Then, will you give me another chance?" He asks in a breath.
"I'll let you take me on a date and I'll decide after that"
He smiles widely, throwing his arms around you and kissing the top of your head.
"I'll make it be a yes", he whispers, squeezing you more in his embrace.
You know you'll forgive him completely soon, Hyunjin can't hide his emotions from you so you know he's telling the truth but you sure as hell are not going to make it easy for him.
459 notes · View notes
faefictions · 8 months
Text
Snow in Indiana
Eddie Munson x Reader
5.7k words
Eddie has spent the past decade thinking about the pen pal he lost touch with, but fate has a funny way of bringing people back together when they need it most
Warnings: family death (unedited bc it is 3am and I have been working on this for hours)
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“Dear Eddie, 
Does it Snow in Indiana?” 
He had read the beginning of the note hundreds of times by now. He had memorized how each individual letter had been written and slightly smudged. He knew the entire contents of the letter by heart, but that never stopped him from coming back to it from time to time. 
“My grandma hasn’t told me much about Hawkins, just that it’s just like home. Except it’s on the other side of the country. Grandma likes the snow, so I hope you say yes.” 
Something about the innocent nature of your writing calmed him down when things got rough. He had received the note in the middle of August at the beginning of 6th grade. Your grandmother had just moved across the country, and she just so happened to be the Librarian at Eddie’s new middle school. She had told both of you that the other could use a friend, even if you were thousands of miles apart. She also insisted that being pen pals would improve both of your lackluster reading and writing skills. She meant well. 
“Can I tell you the truth? I didn’t want to write you a letter when grandma called and told me I should. My teachers say I’m not good at writing anyway. But Grandma also said maybe you and I could be friends. And I think I would like that.” 
Some of your words had been crossed out with pen, either from misspellings or second thoughts on phrasing. Eddie had stared at the paper for so long that he even knew what was underneath those scribbles. 
When the snow started coming down each winter, it was hard for him to not want to keep the letter on him at all times. The opening line of your first letter to him always floated into his head with the first snowflakes. 
He had written you back to assure you that it does snow in Indiana, that he too had troubles with pleasing his teachers with his school work, and of course, that he too would like to be friends. 
That was over 10 years ago now. He had never met you, never heard your voice, never learned what you looked like (besides the poorly drawn picture you had included for him one time) but you had been a part of him for his middle school years. 
The letters started slowing down in the 8th grade. You had told him you were nervous for high school, that you’d heard that kids were meaner there. The last letter he had sent you was in the summer before both of your freshman years. He hated that he couldn’t remember what he had said, what his last words to you were. All he knew was that he wished you luck for your first day. 
Then the letters stopped completely. After months of checking mailboxes impatiently, he got the hint and gave up. 
At the age of 24, he wishes he sent another letter. He wishes he got some closure on why you stopped writing. He had always wondered if it had been something he had said, or maybe you had just found new friends in high school and decided you didn’t need him anymore. 
He was embarrassed to admit that it was his first heartbreak. So he refused to admit it even happened to anyone he knew now. 
He tucked the old letter in his pocket as another patron entered the diner. He had picked up a second job as the night cook in hopes of saving up enough to to move out of the trailer with Wayne. It had been months of helping Wayne with bills now, and he was just barely starting to see the hard work pay off in his savings account. 
He peeked out the pass through window to get a glimpse of the first customer they’d had in the last hour and a half. The snow had been coming down hard, and it was preventing the already few people who would be coming in to the diner at this hour from showing up. He wasn’t surprised to see the young woman, somewhere around his age, follow the waitress quickly to the booth in the corner and sit down. He was, however, surprised to see no new car in the small lot outside. He hadn’t seen headlights arrive or depart to drop her off. The snow that has accumulated on her hair, even thought it has been covered with a hood, was making him think she had walked a distance to get here. If the counter hadn’t been blocking his view, he would have seen the bottom of her pants completely soaked through from the snow piled outside to confirm his suspicion. 
“Can you start on a stack of pancakes, Ed?”
He nodded at the waitress, Judy, who wasn’t usually one to whisper like she was now. She rushed off to the phone in the back office, which did nothing but pique the interest in Eddie’s under stimulated brain. 
Curiosity got the best of him, so he made his way out of the kitchen quickly, grabbed a mug from the counter and the full coffee pot, and made his way over the girl in the corner. 
You had been staring out the window, and Eddie recognized the look as he approached. You were doing your best to hold yourself together. He was used to this kind of customer at this time of night. People who really needed the company, who had nowhere else to go, often found their way here after midnight. But there was something different about you, and it wasn’t just that he had never seen you around town. No matter how hurt he could tell you were inside, you did your best to keep up a facade when you saw him approaching. 
“Coffee?” he offered, less poised than he had intended.
“Please,” you smiled up at him as he set down the mug and poured. He allowed himself to take you in, and that’s when he saw the snow still caked on to your sneakers, and the damp cloth stretching from the hem above your ankle nearly up to your knees. There was snow yet to melt from head to toe, and you were trying your best not to shake from the cold. 
“You walk here?” He tried to make light conversation as he chuckled, but you weren’t as chipper. 
“My car broke down about a mile up the road. Walking was my only option,” You tried to keep the smile on your face, but Eddie saw the look, almost like a shunned child. As if you were embarrassed by what you had done, preparing for the lecture or consequence coming your way. 
Before he could say anything, Judy returned from the back office. 
“Tow truck won’t be running ’til morning, darlin’. But I left a message telling them you’d call first thing,” Judy gave you a halfhearted smile, before turning to Eddie, “Where’s that stack I told you to start on?” 
“Right, sorry,” he quickly excused himself back to the kitchen, but did his best to listen for the conversation you were having on the other side of the room. 
“Where are you staying tonight? I can try to get you a ride there.” 
“My grandma’s house, well it used to be I guess. I think it’s just a few more miles into town, I’m not a hundred percent sure though, I’ve never been out here.” 
“Used to be your grandma’s house?”
“Yeah, she, uhm… passed away not long ago. Hard to own something six feet under,” you tried to joke, but failed to make either of you laugh, “Funeral service is next week, I came early to pack up her things. Guess I chose the wrong day to drive in though.” 
“I’d say. Well let me see what I can do, do you have the address?” 
“Yeah, it’s right…” you trailed off as you checked your pocket, slowly coming to realize that you had left the torn piece of paper with the address written on it on your passenger seat, right on top of the map you were struggling to follow in the heavy snow. “Guess I left it in the car.” 
Just as the realization was threatening to break you, Eddie came and set a fresh stack of 3 pancakes in front of you. 
“You eat up, it’s on the house. And let me know if you remember any of that address,” Judy smiled at you and walked into the back before you could refuse the free pancakes.
Eddie watched you for the next hour through the pass through window. No other customers came in, so he didn’t exactly have anything better to do. It was nearing 4 am, the end of Eddie’s shift. He had cleaned his station in the kitchen faster than he ever had and made his way out to your table to check on your before he left. 
“Any luck with that address?”
“Don’t think I’d remember it with a gun to my head. I might as well walk back and grab it.” 
“Not a chance. My shift is over in a few minutes. Why don’t I drive you back to your car, you can grab it, and I can get you there.”
“I couldn’t possibly-“
“No need to be polite. You’ve had a rough enough night, let’s just get you home.”
You didn’t correct his phrasing. This was the furthest you had ever been from home, and you were sure as hell feeling that in this strange diner with barely a concept of where you were. The snow falling outside only exacerbated your feeling of being out of place. 
Eddie rushed to the back to grab his belongings and wish Judy a good night, letting her know he was going to get you out of there, before he made his way back out to you. You had brought the hood of your sweatshirt back up, and were staring out at the snow silently. He approached cautiously and gently spoke, “Let’s get out of here,” before guiding you through the door. 
“I’m Eddie, by the way. Sorry I didn’t properly introduce myself earlier.” 
You paused at his name, but he was too busy trying to find his van through the wall of snow to notice. 
“I’m y/n, thanks again for helping. You and Judy are both angels.” 
He smiled at your name for a moment, but kicked the idea from his mind. 
Both of you thought of the letters you had sent all those years ago, unaware that the person climbing into the same car as you was in fact the person you were reminiscing on. 
Eddie shook the snow out of his hair like a wet dog before starting the van. 
“Left out of the lot?” 
“Yeah,” you smiled. 
“You know, I’ve helped fix up a few cars in my day. I could take a look under the hood for you when we get there if you’d like.”
“You’re already helping enough, thank you though.”
“I really don’t mind. Can’t hurt just to take a look.” 
The glance and smile he shot you made your stomach do flips. In the low light of the passing, sparse streetlights, he looked incredibly handsome. Your mind wandered back to what you thought your Eddie looked like back in middle school. You had sent him a drawing of yourself, mostly as a joke since your drawing skills as a 12 year old weren’t amazing, but you were also trying to send him the message that you desperately wanted to know him better. Of course, when your grandmother had insisted you become pen pals with a strange boy, you weren’t too happy about the idea, but as time went on, the sound of a friend sounded too nice. You hadn’t had many of them in elementary school, and it concerned your family. But as your friendship with Eddie grew with each letter, you found yourself hoping for something, anything, more. Now, as an adult, you blame your adolescent brain for the silly crush. But that didn’t stop you from thinking about him from time to time, still wondering what he might be doing in that moment, or if he is happy. But most of all, you wondered if he missed you as much as you missed him. 
“You doing alright over there?” he asked you over the quiet metal playing over the speakers. He was playing it at about 1% of the volume he usually listened at, in an attempt to not scare you off just yet. 
“Yeah, just a long night,” you smiled back at him. He nearly assured you that you could be real with him, that he could tell that something more was bothering you, but he worried that would be coming on too strong. And before he could find a way to say it without sounding creepy, you pointed out your car on the side of the road with a sigh. 
It had only been a couple hours since you had left it, but it was nearly buried in the snow. 
“That’s a little more difficult to check out,” He chuckled as he pulled to the side of the road, lighting up your car with his headlights. 
“It’s fine, I’ll just go grab the address and we can get going,” you tried not to sigh as you opened the passenger door. 
“Wait a second,” Eddie reached for your hand before you could make it out of the car, “I’m fine with taking a look, and I can grab the address too. No need for you to get cold again.” 
“I already walked a mile in the snow earlier, I don't think a minute out there will kill me.”
“All the more reason for you to stay in here if you ask me.”
“Fine, but skip looking under the hood. I can call the tow truck when I wake up, it should be fine until then. Even if you could fix it with nothing, I don’t think I should be driving any more today.”
“Long trip?”
“Since 8 am. I really just want to get to sleep.”
“Deal,” he smiled again before stretching his hand out to you, “Keys?”
You reluctantly let him have the keys to go grab the paper, but not before trying to assure him you were capable of grabbing it yourself. You watched him as he rushed as fast as he could through the near foot of snow, grabbed the address, and rushed back to the van. 
“You didn’t lock it,” you stated, nervous to not to sound nagging. 
“I know, do you have a bag or something I can grab for you?”
“Oh, yeah, I’m sorry.” 
“Don’t be, where is it?”
“It’s in the back seat on the passenger side. It’s a small black suitcase.”
“You got it, here, take this,” he handed you the torn paper with your grandmother’s previous address written on it in a handwriting that would have been familiar to him, had he glanced down at it. 
He ran back to grab your suitcase, and made sure to double check that the doors had locked after he shut them before he rushed back to the van. He threw your suitcase in the backseat before jumping back into the drivers seat. 
“I don’t know how you lasted a mile in that, I’m already freezing,” he complained, but his smile still refused to leave his face. 
“I’m sorry,” you tried yet again to apologize. 
“Don’t be,” he paused to look you in the eye to assure you that he wasn’t upset in the slightest, “Now let’s see that address. Hopefully I actually know where it is.”
You handed him the paper, and even in the low light, you couldn’t miss the way his face fell, even for a millisecond. He hadn’t seemed to stop smiling all night, but the second he saw the paper, it faltered for just a moment. 
“Everything ok?” 
He looked up at you, and you could tell he wanted to say something, but thought better of it. 
“Yeah, uhm, this is on the other side of town though. It’s a bit of a drive, is that ok?”
“I’d rather drive a little further than stay in my car tonight. So yeah, it’s fine,” you giggled, relieved that he didn’t seem angry or annoyed with you like you thought. 
But he had seen the handwriting. He would know it anywhere, yet he still wouldn’t let himself get caught up in the coincidences. You were just a girl with similar handwriting, and the same name. You weren’t his y/n. He could never be so lucky. 
“So, what brings you to town?” he asked after a moment of driving. 
“It isn’t the happiest story, and I don’t want to be a bummer.” 
“I’m nosey, and that does nothing to curb my interest,” he joked. He just needed to prod, he needed to know if he was being crazy. 
“My grandma passed… about a week ago now. Her funeral is next week, but someone needed to clean up her house for the service, and no one else wanted to make the drive out.” 
“Do you have any other family in the area to help out?”
“No, she only had 2 sons. My dad and my uncle, and they’re both back west. She moved here, like, 12 years ago now I think. Maybe 13.” 
Just another coincidence. He’s not this lucky. 
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
You looked at him out of the corner of your eyes. You hadn’t heard that yet. Just stressed adults complaining about how traveling in the winter was too much of a hassle. Hearing those words, from a near stranger no less, was enough to make you tear up. And Eddie could hear that in your voice when you thanked him, but he chose not to comment on it. 
“So,” you began after a moment of awkward silence, “How long have you lived in Hawkins?”
“My whole life.”
“Do you like it here?”
“Uh… It has its moments,” he tried his best to hide his discontent with the town. If it weren’t for his uncle, his band, and his small group of friends, he would have ran for the hills by now. He was too attached to them to run… and also lacking the funds to do so. 
“That good huh?” you laughed. 
“Hate to sound like an ass, but there are definitely plenty of cons that outweigh the pros for me half the time. But that’s not everyone’s experience.”
“Grandma seemed to like it, but she also liked it back home, and it’s no cake walk back there.” 
You almost spat the end of your sentence, and although it wasn’t spoken explicitly, Eddie understood. 
“Sorry, I don’t mean to keep bringing the conversation down. It’s just been a really long week.”
“I believe it,” He paused, “So how long are you going to be staying in town then?”
“I have no idea. Rumor is Grandma left me the house. And even if she did…. I’m sorry, I’ve been awake for almost 24 hours now, and driving for over 15 of them. I know you really don’t need to hear any of this.” 
You started to make your body as small as possible, hyper aware of how loudly you had been speaking, and how riled up you were getting. Your father would have hated to see it. But not Eddie. 
“No, keep going. Like I said, I’m nosey, and it sounds like you could use someone to talk to about this.” 
“You sure?”
“Yeah,” he agreed nonchalantly, unaware how much it meant to you. 
“My grandma and I were really close before she moved. She didn’t get along with either of her sons, but she was the world to me as a kid. And my dad put up no effort to even reach out to her in the past decade, but he expects all of her stuff to be left to him, and my uncle wants the same. But my mom told me that one of them had reason to believe that she left it all to me. I don’t even know where they heard it, and don’t get me wrong, I’m not ungrateful, I promise. I just don’t know what to do about the two grown men that she apparently left out of the will if that’s true, and how mad they’re going to be at me.” 
“They wouldn’t be mad at you.” 
“You don’t know my dad,” you scoffed. You knew damn well that the man wasn’t afraid of throwing a tantrum, especially if it came to money. And he wouldn’t care if you were the one getting hurt in the process. 
“What would they have to be mad at you for though? For your Grandma loving you enough to leave you something to start your life on? How is that your fault?”
“It doesn’t matter if it’s my fault, they just care that they get their share. If it’s left to me, I might as well just divvy it up before they say anything.”
“But that’s not what you want, is it?”
“I just don’t want to have any issue with them.” 
“I’m sorry, that’s not fair to you.” 
“You really need to stop being so nice, you’re going to make me cry,” you chuckled, genuinely fighting back the tears as you spoke. 
“Sorry,” he chuckled back. He took a subject before continuing. “Have you seen the house? Like have you ever visited?”
“No, actually. Who knows, maybe it’s a real fixer upper and I’d be better off passing it on to my uncle,” you giggled, and that put the smile back on Eddie’s face. 
“If I didn’t mess up the address, it should just be in this next neighborhood.”
You kept saying that all you wanted was to get some rest after your long day, but now that you were talking to Eddie, you didn’t want the drive to end. The disappointment hit you like a rock as he pulled into the driveway of your grandmothers old house, but the feeling quickly turned to something else as you looked out the window to see the beautiful 2 story house with large trees on either side. 
“So much for the fixer upper theory,” Eddie said with a whistle, but you were speechless. This was much more than you had been anticipating, much nicer than you had spent your younger years picturing every time you missed your grandma. 
“You ok?” he asked after a moment of silence. 
“Oh, yeah. Sorry, I was just taking it in,” you chuckled nervously, still staring at the house. 
“Why don’t we get you inside?” He said, reaching in the back for your suitcase. You put a hand gently on his arm to stop him, and he looked up to see your nearly empty stare, still on the building in front of you. 
“Can you give me just a minute? I’m sorry, I know it’s late.” 
“No, it’s fine… Are you ok?”
“Yeah…Yeah, It just,” you trailed off for a moment, “I hadn’t seen her in years. Had no idea what her house looked like, or what she looked like anymore. I got letters, I got calls, but… Part of all this didn’t feel as real. Going in there, that’s real.” 
“Want me to come in with you?”
“No, that’s fine. I just need a second.” 
“Have you ever lost anyone before?”
You didn’t answer, just shook your head as you moved your eyes from the house to him. 
“Let me walk you in. You shouldn’t be alone for that.” 
You looked back at the house for a moment, took a deep breath, and nodded your head. 
Eddie carried your suitcase through the front door, and you both kicked off your shoes before stepping on the carpet. You took a deep breath before reaching for the light switch. Eddie sensed your hesitation as your fingers hovered. He took the opportunity to grab the fingers of your other hand. It gave you enough courage to turn on the light in the entry way. 
The furniture was mostly unfamiliar. You could see a few pieces in the living room that you had remembered from your childhood, and the sense of nostalgia calmed you. Eddie let you walk ahead of him, letting go of your hand as you ventured further into the room. Slowly but surely, you made your way to a wall on the other side of the room. It was covered in pictures, new and old, of your grandma with family and friends. You recognized yourself in plenty of them, but the newer ones were the ones that you couldn’t stop looking at. She looked so much older that you had remembered, but still had the youthful glow to her that you had attributed to her mischievousness. No matter how old she got, how wrinkled her face grew, or how gray her had and gotten, you still recognized her. Part of your heart began to ache for not knowing her as she was before she passed. It had been so long. 
You felt Eddie approach you from behind, and you expect him to say something nice, or encouraging. But he didn’t. He was surprisingly quiet. You turned to make sure he was alright, but he didn’t seem fine. He was staring at one of the photos on the wall, and he looked like he was about to be sick.
“Are you ok, you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Uh, yeah,” he replied, still white as a sheet as he tore his eyes from the photo to look at you. He barely shot you a half smile before looking back up at the pictures. You took a step back to stand next to him. 
“I just remembered that she worked at the middle school when she moved here. Did you know her?”
“Yeah.”
“…Did you like her?” you tried asking after waiting for him to say anything more. 
“Yeah, she introduced me to my best friend.”
“Me too,” you smiled at the memory of your old pen pal. 
“Someone back home?”
“No, actually. I probably shouldn’t refer to him as that still. We haven’t spoken in… years actually.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” he said, finally peeling his eyes away from the photos on the wall. 
He should have said more, but he didn’t know what else to say. This was her. He was in shock. The girl he had spent the last decade wondering about had wandered into his diner. His thoughts were moving a mile a minute, he felt like he could physically hear them, and it was hard to focus on anything you had possibly said. But luckily, you weren’t saying much. 
He followed you like a ghost as you explored the first floor of the house. You were happy you had arrived before anyone else. You had the chance to see the house how she had left it, how she had lived in it. It gave you a sense of closure you weren’t going to get otherwise, it felt as if you were getting a sense of knowing her once again. You were caught up in it until you saw a clock on the wall, reading nearly 5 am. Realization hit you that you were keeping Eddie, and a sense of guilt washed over you. You turned to find him, with a bit of color returned to his face. 
“It’s really late, I’m sorry I’ve kept you. You can go home if you’d like. I’m sure you want to get some rest too after your shift.” 
He took a second, before asking, “Are you sure you’ll be alright?” And you hesitated before nodding. 
“Honestly, the roads are pretty bad out there. I could stay on the couch, help you figure out your car in the morning. How does that sound?”
He way have been a complete stranger just hours ago, but you really did feel like you could trust him. So you smiled and nodded. 
“I’ll go find some blankets for you,” you smiled before disappearing up the stairs. Eddie didn’t expect you to come back for a while. You were bound to find your grandmothers bedroom and need to look around for a while. He made his way back to the living room while he waited. He stared at the wall again, but not in shock this time. Now that he knew was 24 year old you looked like, he desperately want to see what 12 year old you looked like. He found a picture near the middle of the wall, of a young girl smiling at the camera. It was the only photo on the wall without your grandmother in it. She had your eyes, had your smile, but most importantly, she actually looked like the drawing he had received all those years ago. You weren’t as bad of an artist as you’d thought. Eddie tried not to grow emotional staring at the photo. He only tore his eyes away from the picture of younger you when he heard you making your way back down the stairs.
Before you could reach Eddie, you paused by the window next to the back door, blankets in hand. The snow coated the back yard, reflecting the light from the back porch into the sky. You began to tear up, just as Eddie approached to take the blankets from you. He saw one of the first tears fall down your cheek, and quickly, but gently put an arm around you. 
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing, just… Is this what it looks like every winter?” you asked, looking up at him with misty eyes. 
“For parts of it, yeah. Why?”
“Grandma loved the snow,” was all you could reply before looking back out at the yard. 
He contemplated it for a second, fought himself on whether or not this was the right moment to say it, but he couldn’t help himself. 
“I told you she’d like it here” 
A moment passed as you processed what he had said. You gasped quietly, quickly turning your head to face him. He looked nervous, as if he had just handed his heart to you on a platter, waiting to see if you would reject it. 
“Eddie?” you asked cautiously, and you both knew what the question really was. 
“Yeah,” he nodded, still nervous and unable to read what you were thinking. 
“You stopped writing,” was all you could get out before another tear dropped. 
“What?”
“Y-you stopped writing,” you repeated, beginning to choke on your breathes as you spoke. 
He nearly panicked as he tried to reply. 
“Y/n, w-what do you mean? I only stopped writing when you stopped replying.”
“Oh my god, it’s really you,” you couldn’t stop looking at him, another tear dropping down your cheek. Your exhaustion was exaggerating your emotions, but you may have felt the same regardless. You had waited 12 years for this moment. 
“Yeah. Why don’t we go sit down,” he smiled at you, before herding you towards the couch. 
“Y/n,” he spoke softly as he crouch in front of you, one hand resting on each of your knees as you sat on the couch, “What do you mean I stopped writing?”
“I sent you a letter, you never replied.”
“That’s impossible, I waiting for months to hear back from you. There’s no way I missed a letter from you.”
“No, I sent one, and I waited, but you never replied. You broke my heart Eds,” you quietly began to sob, filled with too many mixed emotions. 
Eddie quickly sat next to you on the couch and pulled you to his chest to comfort you the best he could, but he was still confused. He had checked his own mailbox, his neighbors mailboxes, other houses in town with the same street number as his trailer. This didn’t add up. He quietly shushed you as he thought. 
“What did the last letter say?” he asked as you began to calm down just slightly. He had half the collection of your letters memorized, but especially the first and last. He would know if he had read it if you described it. 
“It was before Freshman year, I told you how scared I was that all the kids were going to be mean. I was so afraid that I was going to get singled out for still having no friends, and I waited for months to hear back from you. But you never wrote back. You were my only friend, and you stopped writing.”
“No, sweetheart, I would never,” he sighed as his heart dropped. He got that letter, he replied to it. Which meant that she never got his last letter. Neither of them had stopped writing on purpose, they had both assumed the other had given up. But he had sent out one last letter that was unaccounted for.
“Sweetheart, can you look at me,” he gently guided you to look up at him, “I promise you, I wrote back. I don’t know what happened to it, but I never would have stopped writing like that. I thought you had just ignored my last letter.”
“You wrote,” you said quietly, and Eddie couldn’t tell if it was a question, or if you were trying to reassure yourself. 
“I did, I promise,” he whispered as he swept a tear off your cheek with his thumb. 
And though you still needed to know what happened to his letter, and you had had one of the longest days of your life, nothing mattered more to you in that moment than leaning in, slowly. You took a second, pausing right before reaching his lips so he could pull away if he wanted, but he didn’t. It was a quick kiss, but it was gentle and sweet. Eddie didn’t try to pull you in for another, but he didn’t want to part as you pulled away. 
It took him a second to open his eyes again, but when he did, he was smiling just as big as you. 
“You ok?” he asked for what must have been the hundredth time that night. But unlike every other time you had answered, this time you told him the truth. 
“I am now.”
(may or may not be already trying to figure out a part 2 for this, depending on if people like it <3 )
@embrace-themagic @fanficparker  @heartbeats-wildly @saturn-aka-six @calum-hoodwinked-me @peterplanet @mischiefmanaged49 @nicotine-sunshine820 @itsjusttor @emistrash @thenoddingbunny-blog @sovereignparker @raajali3 @eddielives1986 @eddieswifu @chickpeadumpsterfire @fluffybunnyu @panagiasikelia @canthavetoomuchchaos @whenshelanded @starlitlakes @witchwolflea @ali-r3n @g0thdraculaura @celestcies
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i-am-hungry-24-7 · 5 months
Text
[The Last Dance] Simon “Ghost” Riley*Reader
Hurt and a bit of comfort? maybe?
poor Simon, someone please send me some fluff ideas for him or I’m unable to stop writing angst about him. (cuz that’s the only thing in my note for him)
word count: 744
You never visit his dreams.
Every day he’s a walking corpse, mindlessly doing what he should done, saying goodnight to his teammates, and coming back to his quarter, hoping he can see you one more time.
but he never dreams of you these days, despite how desperate he is.
“You need some rest, I can give you a few weeks of leave, Simon.” He simply shakes his head at Price’s suggestion.
There’s no home waiting for him anymore, a haven for him to sleep soundly.
Until the night Simon deems he hit his limits, you finally appear in his dream.
There stood you, at the quiet bay you two always date, your usual smile lingering on the face imprinted in his heart.
He runs, stumbles a few times maybe, but he never stops his feet until he’s in front of you.
“Simon.”
“I fucking miss you... god...” He pulls you into his arms immediately, squeezing hard so you won’t flee from him by any chance.
He just buries his face to hide his sobs as you rub his back comfortingly.
“You should move on, honey.” You break the silence first.
“How am I supposed to?” He can feel his face stained with tears, but he pays no mind to it, eyes never leave yours, letting them stream his sorrow down.
“Remember the dance we always do?” As he leans into your fingers that are wiping his tears, he hears you ask softly.
“I never forget.”
“Hey, let’s do it again, yeah?”
Your soft hands — cold, he notices — guide him to the proper posture, and leads the dance start.
He remembers the first day you tried to teach him the dance, and he reluctantly agreed.
He remembers the first time he didn’t step on your toes, and you praised him cheerfully.
He remembers those days he held you close and giggled with you during the dance, at here.
Swaying slowly along you, waltzing in a graceful circle, you sing the music just like you always did when dancing with him.
As you breeze to the last tone, both of you stop at the same place, nothing moves except the waves hitting the cliff beneath.
“Better now?”
“No.” He admits through a hiccup.
“Still so honest huh” you laugh “but listen to me, Simon.”
He lets you cradle his face in your palms, he hates that your hands are so cold, unlike the warmth he stole from you in winter.
“You can find a way to remember me, but don’t let me leash you in the past.”
“Keep going, my love, protect those people that you love when they’re still aside.”
The seriousness on your face is what he never gets from you before, he just stares at you, and eventually, nods his head.
“That’s my man.”
You let go of him, satisfied.
“Time to go now” you take a look at the sky and face him again. “before that, can you smile for me one last time? You know I love it.”
“I’m bloody ugly right now.” He sighs, but he still manages to pull his lips into a contorted grin.
“Well, true”
“but still the most handsome man for me.”
- - - - - -
Simon opens his eyes.
4 am, the clock indicates, earlier than the alarm he set, but he has a plan today.
“Only one day off?” Price crooks his eyebrows when he signs the paper for Simon to have permission to leave.
“Yeah, one day’s enough.”
Walking to the parking lot, he jumps into his car and starts driving to his destination.
The tranquil feelings he hasn’t experienced for months accompany him on his journey to the bay.
Everything’s the same as he visited here last time. Still a silent bay without people, the sea spuming over the cliff, filling the air with soothing crashes of the surf.
He’s afraid of visiting here after you leave, the emptiness is deafening without your singing.
Unsurprisingly, the hollow in his heart becomes more painful as he steps to the same spot in his dream last night.
Yet still, he gazes at the ocean for a good while, and chants out the song lowly.
The cavity in his bleeding heart starts healing.
190 notes · View notes
venerawrites · 6 months
Note
Hey, could you write some Gaara angst. He and his fiancé fought over something and the argument was that bad where he said things that he shouldn’t have. His fiancé has to leave for a mission the next day,a dangerous one at that. Things go wrong on her mission and she’s now in the hospital and it’s hard to say if she’ll live or not. Gaara is in complete emotional distress and guilt because he feels that it’s his fault that his fiancé might not live.
Have a lovely day!
author's note: I saw "she" in the request, so I am rolling with a fem! reader. It's not a secret I love writing angst, so I really enjoyed writing this one. I hope you like it as well! <3 Thank you for requesting!
warnings: none, other than reader can be a little bit annoying in the first half lol
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This is not how the evening was supposed to go.
As the last day before your two-week mission, you imagined it as a romantic day, filled with lots of laughter, kisses, and good homemade food, which you had spent all day making.
A screaming match in your fiancé's office was definitely not part of the plan.
"Lower your voice", Gaara sighed, his fingers making their way to rub soothing circles on the side of his forehead. You had stormed into the Kazekage's building about an hour ago, and while your demeanour was progressively getting worse and more aggressive, somehow he had still managed to remain collected.
"Excuse me?", you let out a scoff, marching towards his desk and slamming your hands on top of it, "Don't command me like that! Who do you think you are?"
The words triggered something inside of him and he abruptly stood up, slamming his hands right next to yours and getting right in your face. His eyes, usually calm and inviting, were now cold and dark, showing that there was a storm brewing inside of him.
"I am your fiancé, but most importantly your Kazekage", he gritted his teeth, emphasizing his title, " I know you are upset and I said I am sorry! But your shenanigans stop now!"
Tilting your head, you remained silent and narrowed your eyes, determined not to give up on the little staring contest you had going on. Pressing your lips together, you moved your jaw in annoyance, your breathing heavy with the pent-up frustration.
"Well, guess what, Kazekage?", your words came out almost mocking, while a small sarcastic smirk appeared on your face, "If you tired of dealing with my "shenanigans", maybe you should run and complain to your little friend from the Leaf. I am sure he would be more than happy to hear we are on the verge of breaking up because of him."
"Are you hearing yourself?", Gaara finally raised his voice, moving away from the desk, while running his hand through his red locks, "Break up because of Naruto? You are being absolutely ridiculous, Y/N!"
"I am being ridiculous? This is our last day before my mission and you decide to spend it with Naruto!", you screamed, shaking your hands in the air and making a few steps towards him, "One would've thought that you two are engaged, instead!”
A dry chuckle made its way past his lips and he shook his head, trying to calm his mind. Gods knew he loved you more than life itself but in moments like these he questioned how fate decided to bring you together, considering you were polar opposites.
Gaara was a calm, collected, and reserved individual. He was extremely hard-working and devoted to his nation, so naturally every decision he made was always centered around the well-being of others. He always carefully considered all his options before acting, and rarely resolved to action, if the problem could be resolved peacefully with talks.
You ,on the other hand, were hot-headed, impulsive, and stubborn. Always acting before thinking, you often fail to consider anyone else's needs and wishes in moments like this, too blinded by your selfish desire and feeling of injustice. Unlike the red-headed shinobi, who you described as your "better half", you faced problems head-on, even if that meant you would regret it later.
There has always been some tension between you two, even since you met during your Chunin Exams, but no one believed you would get together, especially after Gaara went through his life-changing phase when he realised the importance of friends and family.
Yet, years later, here you were - a Leaf shinobi who transferred to Suna and was engaged to the Kazekage. Somehow your clashing personalities worked in harmony and you managed to bring the best out of each other.
Well, most of the time...
Today, after he decided to spend the whole day with Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi, thus resulting in him having to work through the evening, was not one of these times.
While the Leaf ninjas were your old comrades, it was not a secret that you did not share a close bond with them, especially with the blonde.
Naruto has openly vocalized his opinion that Gaara is too good for you and he can find a better, calmer half, who would compliment him as a future spouse of the Kazekage. He always made it clear that while he did not exactly hate you, he did not approve of you.
In response, you did not hide your thoughts about their friendship and the fact that your partner was giving him too much credit. Of course, Naruto did have some role in his decision to change for the better, but ultimately it was Gaara who did all the work. Additionally, the blonde was loud, assertive, and loved to poke his nose in other people's business, including your relationship.
"Y/N, enough!", your fiancé's voice boomed, his aura suddenly darker, "Do not talk about my friends like this!"
"Do you keep the same energy when he talks about me?", your brow raised, "When he says how I don't deserve you and tries to fill your head with the craziest ideas about us!"
Gaara let out a puff of air, before turning around and marching towards you. Stopping just a foot away, he lifted his hands towards you, laying them on your shoulder.
"I. Had. Enough!", he hissed each word through his teeth, a sign he was really pissed off at you now, "No one talks about you and no one is trying to fill my head with anything! I don't need anyone to tell me that we are incompatible when I can clearly see that myself!"
The insults and swears that were ready to fall from your mouth got stuck in your throat and your eyes widened for a few seconds, before narrowing again.
"What are you getting at?", this time your voice was quieter, but still with a note of challenge behind it.
Suddenly there was a spark of uncertainty behind his blue eyes. Slowly removing his hands from your body, he walked towards the window with his back facing you.
"I think we need a break. It's just... It's not working anymore", he murmured, gaze focused on the peaceful streets of Suna. He found it easier to say what he was thinking right now if he avoided looking at you.
A minute passed.
Gaara expected you to scream at him, swear at him, or even grab something from his desk and throw it at his head. But when he heard the door of his office opening and slamming shut, he jumped in surprise. Turning around, he found the spot where you were standing just a minute ago, empty, while your diamond ring shined lonely at the edge of his desk.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It's strange how distorted a person's time perception becomes once they are eagerly waiting for something.
Two weeks, which usually flew by, given his busy schedule, now felt like an eternal nightmare for the young Kazekage. Eaten by the guilt of how your last conversation ended, he severely punished his mind and body by refusing to eat, drink, or socialize with anyone outside his work. He practically lived in his office and if it wasn't for Kankuro to send him to shower every morning, after working the whole night, he probably would had not set a foot outside.
This morning, however, he refused to do even that. You were supposed to come to report about your mission any moment now and he shifted nervously in his seat, mentally rehearsing the apology he wanted to say to you.
An hour passed.
Then two.
Gaara kept glancing towards the door, yet no one entered, except his secretary who kept dropping piles of paperwork on his desk. He tried to question if any ninjas have showed in the building today, but she kept shaking her head "no" with an apologetic smile on her lips.
Finally, just after noon, a small, barely audible knock reached his ear and he immediately straightened his posture and fixed his hair, before giving his response. His eyes gleamed with anticipation and he stood up, ready to greet you back home.
His, smile, however, quickly dropped once he saw that only one of your teammates, Bumi, entered his office. Covered in scratches across his face and hands, he looked like he had taken some rough beating not long ago. Gaara's blood froze.
If Bumi, the largest and the most skilled ninja in your squad, looked like this, what has happened to you?
"Lord Kazekage", the man greeted, before bowing his head. He made his way towards the desk and placed a tightly wrapped scroll on it, but his gaze remained cast downward.
"The report for our mission."
"Where is Y/N?", the red-headed ninja asked, not even glancing at the document given to him. He had a bad feeling about what was happening and Bumi's lack of eye contact and nervous twitching did not help to ease his worries.
Your teammate looked up, meeting Gaara's intense stare for just a second, before clearing his throat and focusing on his shoes again.
"She...", he stopped, nervously shifting his weight from one foot to another, "Um... she is not here at the moment."
"I can see that", the Kazekage pointed out, completely unamused, "Which is why I am asking - where is she?"
Bumi moved uncomfortably again, before letting out a sigh and taking a seat opposite his red-headed leader. His knee kept bouncing and he nervously shifted around his seat, before opening his mouth again:
"The Elders warned me not to tell you... yet."
Gaara's glare hardened and he crossed his fingers on top of his desk. Pressing his lips in a thin line, he took a deep breath, trying to calm the rising feeling of panic inside of him.
"You answer to me, not the Elders", he almost growled, his eyes not moving away from your teammate. His jaw tensed and that was enough of a sign for Bumi to spill out what was on his mind
"She is in the hospital", he blurted out and Gaara's breath hitched. His fingers started to tremble and he quickly placed them on his knees below his desk, a poor attempt to cover the shock that hit him when he heard the other male's words.
'Maybe it is just a check-up', he tried to reason in his head, 'maybe it is nothing too serious.'
Almost like he read his thoughts, Bumi decided to continue:
"It all happened so fast", he looked down, mentally reliving what happened just this morning, "We were on our way back when we were ambushed. Y/N... She has been acting weird the whole mission. She kept missing her shots and her reactions were slower than normal... I don't know what happened, but it was almost like she was not herself."
Cold sweat started forming on Gaara's temples and he felt his heart speeding inside his ribcage. He felt like he wanted to jump out of his seat and run to the hospital, but it was almost like his body was disconnected from his brain and it chose to stay frozen in place.
"So when this ninja swung his katana towards her stomach, it was too late for her to block it or move away...", Bumi gulped, his eyes now glossy, "The doctors said the cut was so deep, it damaged some of her insides too. And by the time we arrived, she also lost a ton of blood. They... They are not sure if she can make it."
Gaara always considered himself a man who knew what pain was. He has endured so much during his childhood, that he always thought nothing could hurt him anymore.
But the way his whole soul shattered the second he heard you may not make it, was a whole new type of pain. One that pointed its ugly finger to his face, screaming "It is all your fault!", while simultaneously creating feelings of rage and bloodthirst... feelings that stayed buried deep inside of him for years.
"Which village?", was all he said, his blue eyes now empty and staring at the blank wall at the opposite end of his office.
Bumi gulped, standing from his seat. The look on Gaara's face... He has not seen that look since their Chunin days. He was about to sneakily exit the office when the Kazekage's cold gaze fixated him on the spot.
"They had Leaf headbands...", he mumbled, before quickly adding, "But they could've gotten them from anywhere. I don't believe our allies-"
His words were interrupted by the Kazekage's hand which lifted in the air, cutting him mid-sentence. Getting up from his chair, he grabbed his hat, before walking past Bumi towards the door. Thousand different thoughts and ideas were racing through his brain about how he should deal with the situation, but they ultimately led to his need to see you straight away.
The last words he said to you kept echoing in his mind and he felt like throwing up. If he had shown up for your scheduled date night, if he had kept his tongue behind his teeth, if he had shown up at the gates the morning before you left... maybe you would be here, with him, instead of fighting for your life.
He knew he had to get to you, to be with you and somehow beg you to stay with him. But before that, he had one final request to make:
"Gather the Elders and the War Council", he instructed Bumi, while making his way past him, "Our alliance with the Leaf is over."
cc artwork: concept art for "Assassin's Creed: Mirage"
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