#somethin that’s really bothered me these last few days

[permanentreverie]

just a quick lil rant before i head to bed

[erwinsvow]

“stay away from her, rafe,” his sister’s voice comes from behind.

rafe resists an eye-roll, staring out across the pool of tannyhill and in particular, you, his sister’s friend, sprawled out on a beach chair with your nose in a book. he’s seen you before, around the house, usually unable to meet his eyes and flushing at anything he’d say. he didn’t pay much attention before, since you were almost painfully shy and skittish to the touch— definitely too shy for him—but he’s starting to change his mind. 

he watches you lower the book to your chest, covering your flimsy blue bikini and looking up to see where the noise is coming from. you catch rafe’s eye for one second, taking in the fact that he’s staring right at you, and you panic, bringing the book right back up to hide your face. he smirks, until sarah speaks again.

“seriously rafe. don’t even look at her. she’s way too nice for you, anyways.”

“shut up. not doing anythin’, and i don’t have to listen to-”

“sarah!” ward’s voice comes from inside. she walks back inside, telling rafe to leave you alone one last time. he stays out there, minutes passing by quickly, until he notices you glancing up at him again. you walk over in his direction, and even in your demeanor he can tell sarah was right, that you’re so shy you can’t even find the nerve to approach him, and you hover in front of the backdoor, trying to peer inside to see where your friend went.

“need somethin'?” rafe asks you, and he notices your entire body tense up. you turn around slowly to face him, but you stare at your feet while you speak.

“um, i’m sorry. sarah was gonna bring me home.” you look up quickly and then look back down. he thinks it’s cute, though he’s sure he once thought it was annoying. he wonders if you’re like this with everyone. “it’s almost curfew so i should-”

“well sarah’s occupied.” you meet his eyes finally, your own wide like coins, taking in his words. “get your stuff, kid. i’ll take you home.” 

“oh, you don’t have to-”

“get your ass in the car. come on. i don’t have all day.” you comply quickly, gathering your book and bag, not even looking for sarah again, which he likes a little too much. you climb into the passenger seat of his truck, but keep your gaze locked out the window. it’s not until he pulls infront of your house that you speak.

“thanks, rafe,” you mumble quietly. he turns to look at you, but you’re sniffling with quivering shoulders.

“you cryin’?” he’s actually confused—unsure of what he did, if anything. he thought driving you home was something that would make you happy.

“no,” you get out, in between a sob. “i didn’t mean to bother you, or m-make you mad.”

“mad?” he asks, staring at you curiously. rafe thinks maybe he should have expected this, or seen this coming. gears start turning and clicking into place, the way you play with the hem of your dress and keep your head down. you were more messed up than he thought. he chooses his next few words carefully. “and what did i say…to make you think that? hm?”

“y-you said you didn’t have all day. and you sounded upset.” rafe tries to think back, but he hasn’t felt upset with you at any point in the last hour. he exhales, laughing a little. he thinks he could have a lot of fun with you, with the way you behave around him. the very thought of you talking to some other guy like this makes his blood boil. 

“well, m’not. not mad or anythin’ else, okay?” you look back up through watery eyes.

“really?”

“no, kid. not at all. you walk around thinkin’ everyone’s mad at you all the time?”

“i-i don’t know. i guess. you just scared me.”

“well i’ll try not to. get inside. i’ll see you tomorrow.” you climb out, picking up your bag and adjusting your dress. before you turn to head back, you peer in through the open window at rafe. your gaze darts around, finally settling on him.

“tomorrow?”

“yeah, tomorrow. i’ll swing by. g’night, kid.”

“goodnight, rafe.”

[aemvnd]

𝓇.cameron. ┆ blaze.

◟ ㅤᡣ𐭩ㅤㅤ ݁.﹒ a lil late. ‹3 but happy 𝟒/𝟐𝟎 to the angels who celebrate. !!! 🍃♡ྀི also... i'm high as shit rn so sry for any typos—i'll fix 'em later, mwa! 𝓍𝑜𝓍𝑜.

jus' thinkin' abt rafe celebrating 4/20 with his girl . <3

you're with your boyfriend that's still dealing at the time, some marijuana and some coke on the low, and you already know you're getting your little stash for free. rafe spends the last three days making sure he had the best, richest, and highest quality product of weed being shipped for his girl to smoke just in time for 4/20.

typically, rafe didn't let his girl consume any type of drug, even marijuana, and even the lightest of those fruity cocktails you love so much at the country club are just enough to get you drunk after only one or two, so he knows even with 4/20 quickly approaching, he's still going to keep a protective, and firm eye on you at all times.

especially now, since rafe is supposed to be inviting a few of his friends over at tannyhill since rafe's father and his new wife, rose, are on some far, far away vacation, which rafe couldn't give less of a fuck about, preferring to have tannyhill all to himself besides his little sisters, but he doesn't bother with them as much as he used to once he was in a serious relationship with you.

rafe even promised you that he would stop antagonizing the pogues, but only if they disrespect me first, he'd said in return, rather sulkily and reluctant, but he wanted to be a good boyfriend for you and he knew you didn't like violence of any kind.

once 4/20 finally came, you were already high as a cloud come noon, one of rafe's arms wrapped snuggly around your shoulders, tannyhill buzzing with a few people, but rafe doesn't really care about them right now, especially now with the way you're being all sweet and whiny for rafe's attention, acting all submissive and needy and breedable for your daddy—which, of course, rafe didn't mind at all, he liked you like this the most, so sweetly obedient and paying all of your attention on him and only him.

"yeah, princess? y'need somethin', hm?" he breathes teasingly into your ear, watching as your pouty, glossy lips (that tasted like cotton candy) smacked together noisily, making rafe smirk and his head was already quickly processing that you most likely needed a new refreshment.

without a care in the world about who was watching him and his girl, with you already in his lap comfortably, like the princess he always claims you are, sitting prettily and smiling dreamily, doe-like eyes heavy and red, long eyelashes fluttering slowly like a kitten, both freshly done and fluffy and making you appear like a perfect little doll, hanging all over your man as his big hands fondle your asscheeks under your pretty, little babydoll pink miniskirt that was covered with a layer of pretty white lace—my angel, rafe had complimented you earlier, making you all shy and bashful, like you usually were around your boyfriend.

"a'ight, baby… lemme − lemme go get you another water, and then we'll spark up again, yea?" rafe murmurs against your ear, his breath hot and smelling mostly of the overly intoxicating fragrance of the weed you'd all been taking turns taking hits from, mostly from fat blunts and the occasional little joint for the past few hours.

instantly, you breathily mewl in protest and hold onto your boyfriend tighter, arms wrapping around his neck, clinging to him like a little girl that clings to their father.

softly, rafe breathes a light, amused little chuckle, used to your neediness, but knowing you're being extra clingy right now due to the drug and the tiny, few sips of those fruity, alcoholic seltzers that taste like the sweetest thing you can imagine, something that rafe wrinkles his nose at every time he watches you drink them, but pretends to like them for your sake, though he prefers something… stronger.

usually, if it wasn't a special occasion, rafe would bring you to an empty bedroom in whichever house-party he usually brings you along to, with you hanging tightly (and anxiously) onto your boyfriend's arm, letting him lead you upstairs with a large, possessive hand on your lower back, practically resting on your plump, perky little ass, guiding you to some random room to make out for a bit.

and then, after rafe gets bored of just messily making out with you, he fucks your brains out until you're all 'babied brained'—as rafe has occasionally called it, though was actually subspace, but rafe wasn't that thoroughly educated, and again, didn't give a fuck about searching up what it meant when he fucks his girlfriend senseless and within an inch of her life.

of course, rafe could search it up, but it didn't truly interest him and he thought it was just normal, and besides, he already knew you enjoyed being coddled by him and doted on by him after sex, so he figured he didn't need to worry too much—plus, even if he didn't want to admit it, it was a win-win situation for the kook prince, with rafe needing to always hold onto some part of you, especially after being intimate together.

and again, rafe didn't mind your clinginess, practically relishing in it, his ego growing more and more the more he realized how codependent you were becoming on him.

back in the present, rafe feels you begin pressing glossy, sticky kisses all over the side of his face, leading down to his already marked-up neck, causing him to let out a soft, low grunt of frustration and arousal.

"baby," rafe gently chastises, already knowing your sparkly, clear lipgloss with the light undertone of pastel pink—and yes, you always give rafe a haul of every makeup product you buy, using his money, of course—but again, rafe doesn't mind, enjoying the fact that his obedient little princess was becoming so dependent on him for everything, always needing him for something, and rafe... rafe doesn't care what you need from him, if it's something serious or dumb, he'll be there within minutes.

however, in rafe's mind, it's as long as you remember that rafe is your man and you don't need to be calling anyone else for help—that's what rafe was there for, to take care of you and fuck your pretty little pussy, and someday, perhaps sooner rather than later, rafe will pump a large, scorching load into you, deep inside of your womb… that way, you'll never be able to leave him, rafe thinks.

rafe breathes out a small sigh, his thick, muscular arms still wrapped around you, possessively and obsessively, wanting to keep you as close as possibly—meanwhile, he starts his own sloppy, passionate kisses against your lips, smearing your pretty lipgloss against his own lips, tasting how sweet you are, but once again, rafe doesn't give fuck, and he won't give a fuck when you complain to him that you have to reapply your lipgloss again, even though you do so every five minutes anyways.

"lemme jus' go get you another water, sweetcheeks," rafe coos against your lips, suppressing a smile at your instant pout, but quietly observes as you silently and simply crawl off of his lap, sitting to the side of him on one of the usual balcony outdoor furniture sofa's, it was a wooden wicker sofa with plush, probably thousands of dollars worth of cushions that rafe dragged you along to sit with him, but you didn't care, impatiently waiting for your boyfriend to come back to you.

it barely takes five minutes for rafe to return back to you, but there you sit, scrolling through your phone with a cute, bored pout on your plump lips, a fresh coat of your sugary lipgloss already applied, making your lips look extra kissable.

swiftly, rafe takes his seat back down next to you, opening the fresh water bottle for you, a hand going to your lower back casually, while his free hand guides the water up to your mouth, not even having to say anything, already watching as you perk up a bit and lean forward, taking a few eager sips, giving your boyfriend a grateful smile once he sets the water down beside himself when you finish.

with long, deft fingers, and a gorgeous, shiny golden ring decorating his index finger with the cameron family's symbol, rafe easily pulls out a freshly rolled, thickly stuffed blunt from behind his ear, already pulling out a lighter and swiftly lighting the end of it, curling one of his large, calloused hands around the newly burning tip so the spring breeze wouldn't blow out the cherry of the freshly rolled blunt.

"where'd you get that?" you hum curiously, a dreamy, pretty smile curling across your freshly coated glossy lips, already pressing yourself back into rafe's side, one of his thick, tanned arms thrown over your shoulders, keeping you close against him as he stuffs the lighter into the pair of his typical black nike shorts he'd been wearing since the weather has been warm and beautiful, summer coming quicker than you'd thought.

"rolled this f'us when i went inside to grab you a fresh water," rafe explains nonchalantly, still high off of the weed, but also the few bumps of coke he snorted just minutes ago, grabbing his girl his personal stash of the best quality of weed he had, saving it for you, knowing you were gonna beg him to let you smoke once 4/20 came—and strangely, the longer he'd been around you, and the fact that you two have been dating for a few months, the oldest cameron sibling was growing more and more attached to you as time passed, giving nearly into your every whim, no matter your request.

unless, of course, your request had something to do without him.

"you wanna shotgun this with me, baby?" rafe purrs lazily, taking a long hit of the cherry flavored blunt that was currently between his soft, pink lips, still slightly sticky from your previous kisses.

you let out a small, happy noise of agreement, nodding your head gently as you wrap both of your arms around rafe's non-dominant arm, feeling his muscles rippling every time he moved to be closer to you, his pretty girl.

and then, then you see rafe take another long drag, before casually leaning over you completely, pressing you down slightly against the back of the outdoor sofa, a hand holding the burning blunt between two fingers, while his other, much more dominant hand is now curled around your throat, holding you in place with a firm, but gentle grasp as he easily, and slowly, blows the smoke from his lungs into yours—your long, fluffy mink lashes fluttering prettily as the dizzying smoke fills your lungs and clouds your brain, making you smile another dreamy, happy smile.

meanwhile, before you even have time to respond, rafe is kissing you once more—again, this time more deeply, messily, mouth opened as his tongue sucks and plays with yours, humming in content after a long moment once he pulls back, an amused smirk on his kiss-swollen lips, similar to your own swollen lips, your lips smeared with your lipgloss once again, but you don't really care this time.

"this some good shit—huh, baby?"

[finnsbubblegum]

Where It All Starts (Joel Miller X Reader)

Pairing: no-outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

Warnings: fluff, sweet joel, domestic joel, rom-com

Summary: reader as Joel’s neighbor. Joel’s wife left him so Joel asked his neighbor for help in babysitting Sarah. 

Words count: 1.1k

A/N: I’m trying to make this as a rom-com, hope you like my new series! I have a lot of ideas to write about Joel Miller fanfiction and I haven’t finished writing them all. I only have a few days before I start working but I want to write as much as I can. I’m pretty nervous since it’s my first full-time job. Wish me luck! 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20

“Please just let me go! I can’t do this anymore!” You heard a woman’s yell from outside your house while washing the dishes.

“Baby, please.. Just do this for Sarah. Please.” A man begged.

*baby cried*

“I’m sorry, Joel.” 

Curiosity ate you. You peeked through your window and saw your neighbor were having a fight. Assuming they were husband and wife with a newborn baby. The man was carrying the baby while the woman was trying to get inside the car.

“Get in that car and there’s no coming back!” The man raised his voice. 

You felt guilty for eavesdropping because that should be a private conversation but they fought in front of their house and you’re pretty sure everyone in the neighborhood heard them.

The next morning when you were preparing breakfast, you heard a knock. 

“Can I help you?” It was the man from last night.

“Ugh yes, I’m sorry to bother you early in the mornin’. I was wonderin’ if you could help me with somethin’.” He put his hand behind his neck.

“Yeah, sure? What can I help you with?” You opened your door wider and invited him in.

“I live next door…I just had a baby and somethin’ happened with her mom..and I have to go to work so no one is watchin’ my daughter. Uh..You look young, I’m assuming you’re still in college, maybe you could help me babysit my daughter? I’ll pay you of course.”

“Oh! Uhm..Well..I’m not in college actually. I’ve graduated.” You chuckled.

“But I’ll take that as a compliment, sir.” 

“Sorry.” Joel chuckled.

“Uhm..how old is your daughter?” 

“She’s just 3 months old.” 

“Oh!” Your eyes widened. You had never had a baby but you had always wanted one. But how could you possibly be able to babysit a newborn without experience? 

“Sure, I’d like to help.” You were blinded by the man’s puppy eyes.

“Really can you do that? How about your work? Because I don’t want to burden you.” 

“That’s not a problem, sir. I’m taking over my parents’ cafe nearby so I can take your daughter with me. If that’s okay.” 

“You’re the best. Thank you. I’m Joel by the way. Joel Miller” He extended his hand to shake yours.

“I’m (y/n) (y/l/n).” You shook his hand.

Joel invited you to his house and introduced his daughter to you. 

“This is Sarah.”

“Hi Sarah. You’re so cute.” You booped her on the nose.

“Do you know how to hold a baby?” Joel asked you. 

“I’ve held my nephew before but-” 

“Here. Support her head like this.” Joel instructed you.

“Like this?” 

“Yeah, just like that. Don’t worry, you’re doing good.” He placed his hand on your shoulder.

His touch made your heart beat faster. You know you shouldn’t be thinking about this since he just got into a fight with his wife last night. But you couldn’t help it. He could be a single dad any time in the future or probably now. And you admitted your neighbor was a hot young dad. 

“So this is the bag. It has everything in it. Diapers, baby formula, and other things. She eats every 2-3 hours. Here’s the house key.” 

“Got it.” You nodded. 

“Okay, I’m runnin’ late. Here’s my number. Just call me if you need anythin’.” He shoved you a paper written with his phone number.

“You goin’ to work now?” 

“Ugh-yes.” 

“Want me to drive you?” Joel offered to drive you since your hands were full.

“It’s okay. I’ll drive myself.” You refused his offer.

“Okay, well. At least let me help you get settled in your car then?” He carried the big baby bag to your car and helped you settle the baby car seat in your car. 

You put Sarah in the car seat and brought her to work. 

“When did you have a baby again?” You co-workers couldn’t stop staring at the baby you brought to work.

“It’s not mine. It’s my neighbor’s. He’s-” You sighed.

“He? Single dad?” Flo’s eyes widened. She was still in college and working part-time at your cafe. She had a thing for single dads that was why she was interested in your situation.

“I’m not sure. But I heard him fighting with his wife last night. It sounded bad.” You shrugged.

“This could be it. This could be it.” She shook your body excitedly.

“Could be what?” You stopped her.

“You know. I know you’re lonely. And you definitely need a man. Why don’t you try it with him? Is he hot?” She raised her eyebrows up and down.

“I don’t know, Flo. I mean I’m still not ready and I’m sure he isn’t too.”

“Is.he.hot?” Flo repeated.

“Well, kinda?” You shrugged.

“Want my advice boss? I’d say you should flirt with him.” She crossed her arms to her chest.

You rolled your eyes.

“Want my advice? Get back to work or I will cut your pay.” You squinted your eyes.

“Yes, boss.” 

Flo was right. Maybe this was your chance to start dating again. Since the last time you had your heart broken, you were too focused on helping your family’s business. But once you wanted to try dating again, you got a soon-to-be single hot dad? You always had a thing for dads. Just like Flo. Did you win the lottery? Probably. Let’s see.

Sarah wasn’t hard to babysit. You worked while babysitting her and your co-workers helped you so it wasn’t really hard work. You went home by dinner time and left your cafe to your employees to close the store. You put sleeping Sarah to her crib then went back to your car to get the bag. While you were closing the car door, Joel’s car parked on the driveway. You stopped and waited for him.

“Hi.” You put the bag strap to your shoulder.

“Hi. How was she? I hope she’s not taking your energy too much.” He walked closer to you and took the bag from you.

“She’s well-behaved actually.” You smiled and passed him the baby bag.

“Thank God.” Joel sighed.

“I put her to sleep.” You told Joel proudly.

“Thank you. I owe you a lot. I really appreciate it.” He placed his hand on your shoulder again.

“Did you eat dinner Mr. Miller?” You tried to flirt just as Flo told you.

“Not yet. Just call me Joel, please.” 

“Joel.” You hummed.

“Pizza?” Joel suggested.

“Sure.” 

Joel called for a pizza delivery and the two of you spent dinner together. You talked about college and work but not relationships. You were avoiding that topic and so did Joel.

“Thanks for dinner.” You thanked Joel as he walked you home which was just next to his house.

“Anytime.” He put his hands in his pocket.

“So I’ll see you tomorrow when I get Sarah?” 

“Yeah, sure. See you tomorrow. Have a good night.” He kissed your cheek awkwardly.

“Good night, Joel.”

To be continued...

[tightjeansjavi]

Sunday Scaries

(Pre!outbreak Joel Miller x female reader)

A/N: this is for my darling, @loquaciousferret as she deals with her ‘Sunday Scaries’ after a fun weekend out (;

Summary: after a long night out with your girlfriends, you’re suffering through the worst hangover of your life. Your boyfriend Joel is there by your side taking care of you all day long.

~word count: 2.7k~

Warnings: mentions of drinking, established relationship, soft! Joel, he’s so sweet your teeth are going to rot out! Joel, comforting themes, caring for you while you’re hungover, light teasing, praise kink, nicknames, very very light smut, whole lot of fluff! It’s so stinkin cute. (+18) minors dni !

You weren’t sure what time it was exactly when you sent your boyfriend Joel a text message with zero context. You knew by now that he wasn’t the best at reading between the lines. Your text to him was one word: dying. You must have not even realized you had hit send before your head flopped back down on the pillow. You were out late last night with your girlfriends out drinking. You had a few too many vodka-crans, and by the time you had gotten home, you were too drunk, and too tired to even bother taking your little skimpy dress off.

You were rudely awoken by someone banging heavily on your apartment door the following morning. Unbeknownst to you, behind the door was your incredibly concerned boyfriend. When Joel woke up to your text, he didn’t waste any time with quickly getting dressed and snatching his keys to his truck and driving to your apartment. He was definitely driving way over the speed limit but did he care? Not one fucking bit.

You let out a groan as you pulled your pillow over your head to block out the incessant banging. When it didn’t cease, you wrapped yourself up in your thick quilt and forced yourself out from under the covers. You nearly tripped over your discarded strappy heels from the night before as you trudged out of your room. You looked, and felt like the living dead.

After reaching your apartment door, you unlocked it with a grumble and you stepped back slightly as it swung open, revealing your worried out of his fucking mind boyfriend.

“Jesus fuck, Joel. What are you doing here?” Your voice was raw from all the singing you had done with your friends as you rubbed your temples with the pads of your fingers. Your brain was pounding painfully in your skull.

Joel had let out a visible sigh of relief when he saw that you were very much alive in front of him. “What am I doin’ here? Baby, you texted me at like the crack ass of fuckin’ dawn, sayin’ you were dyin’! I raced over here as fast as I fuckin’ could. Thought somethin’ terrible had happened..”

“Oh fuck. I’m so sorry baby I don’t even remember sending you that message honestly. I’m sorry. I was super fucking drunk when I got home last night and I must have sent it around that time. I’m okay, Joel. Just suffering through the worst hangover of my life is all.”

Joel took in your full appearance then. He saw the makeup streaks under your eyes and the smeared left over lipstick. Your hair looked like an absolute rat's nest. Despite looking like hell, you were still the most beautiful girl in his eyes.

“Oh, honey..it’s okay. You don’t gotta apologize, okay? I just wanted to make sure that you were alright..did the vodka crans get to ya again?” he teasingly asked as he leaned against the doorjamb of your apartment door.

“Shuddup Joel. My head is pounding and I really wanna just curl up and fucking die in a hole somewhere..” you grumbled as you turned on your heel and started to head over to the couch. You wasted no time to plop down, face first, with your head buried in one of the pillows.

Joel let out a soft sigh as he watched you plop down onto the couch. He stepped inside your cozy little apartment, closing the door behind him softly as he hung his coat up alongside yours. “I’m sorry you’re havin’ a rough time right now baby. Hangovers can be real fuckin’ nasty.”

“Yeah, no shit Sherlock. I’m regretting all of my decisions right now.” You grumbled into the pillow

You could hear his footsteps approaching where you laid on the couch as he slowly sank down along the corner of the cushion. He gently placed his hand along the small of your back, through the thick quilt that was wrapped around you. “I’m gonna take care of ya, okay? Will you let me do that my sweet girl?” He spoke softly.

“That sounds wonderful. I’d love it if you did.” You turned your cheek to the side so you could see his face before you slowly sat up and brought your arms around him, hugging him tightly with your cheek pressed against his warm chest.

“Let’s get your makeup off first, yeah? You don’t wanna go walkin’ around with raccoon eyes baby.” He chuckled, wrapping his arms around you as he held you close and kissed the top of your head.

“Don’t make me punch you in the fucking balls right now cowboy.” You warned him.

“Shhh. Don’t go sayin’ stuff like that okay honey? Where are your makeup wipes, my love? Bathroom..under the sink yeah?”

“Mhmm..”

“Alright, sugar. You sit tight, okay? Gonna go grab them. You still in your clothes from last night?”

“I was too drunk to take them off. I don’t even know how I got my heels off either. They were an absolute bitch to take off.”

He chuckled softly as he gently rubbed soothing circles against your lower back before he reluctantly released you from his grasp. “M’proud that you made it home in one piece and took them off by yourself. Good job baby.”

You let out a huff when he was no longer holding you and you kinda just flopped back down against the side of the couch like a dead fish.

“Gonna take your makeup off, and run you a nice hot bath. Kay? Then we’re gonna get you out of those clothes and into something much more comfortable.” He gently patted your exposed knee from under the blanket before he walked over to your bathroom.

He easily found your makeup wipes from the cabinet under the sink. He returned to you minutes later, setting the bag of makeup wipes on the coffee table before he was gently grasping your thighs in his warm hands and coaxing you to sit up. “You gotta work with me a ‘lil here. Okay honey? Would it be more comfortable if you sat in my lap?”

“How the fuck did I get so lucky?” You mumbled as you sat up, scooting over so you were close enough to wrap your legs around his waist. Your arms draped around his back, interlocking your hands together as you held yourself against him.

“Mmm. Shouldn’t that be the other way around sugar? I’m the lucky one here. Wouldn't want to spend my Sunday any other way than here, takin’ care of ya.” He said with a small grin creeping onto his lips as he looked at you lovingly, with those big brown puppy dog eyes that you loved so tenderly.

You watched as he pulled out a couple makeup wipes, and he grasped your face in one hand, gently holding you still as he began to wipe away at leftover residue of your makeup along your skin. “You’re such a fucking sap, Miller. I love you.”

“Ditto, honey. Now close those pretty eyes for me, okay sugar? I don’t wanna get this stuff in ‘em. That would really fuckin’ hurt.”

You fought the urge to roll your eyes at his request because he was just too damn adorable right now. Your lashes fluttered shut as he gently wiped away what was left of your eyeshadow. His tongue was poking out between his lips slightly as he was extremely focused on the task at hand.

Once he finished getting most of your makeup off, he pressed a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. Nibbling on it lightly as he elicited a sweet giggle to slip past your lips. “Does that feel a little better baby? Man, that stuff is a pain to get off huh? Let’s go run that bath for you now sweet girl.”

He was gently scooping you into his arms, carrying you to the bathroom while you clung to his strong, broad frame like a koala.

He set you down on the edge of the toilet seat and pressed a soft kiss to your temple before he started the water for your bath. He checked the temperature periodically to make sure that it wasn’t too hot for you.

You watched him with complete adoration in your eyes. Joel Miller was what any girl would want in a boyfriend. God, you were so lucky that he was yours.

“Can feel ya starin’ at me.” He looked over his shoulder at you and shot you a playful wink. “Enjoyin’ the view darlin’?”

“Absolutely. I love seeing my man bent over my tub like that.” You giggled.

“You’re adorable.” He mused as he straightened his back and walked back over to where you were sitting. He gently unwrapped your thick quilt from around your body. “Gonna get you out of the dress okay? It’s so pretty..but I can imagine it was uncomfortable to sleep in all night.”

“I couldn’t get the damn zipper down, Joel. I tried multiple times and it wouldn’t fucking budge.”

“I know honey. It’s okay, I’m here now, pretty girl.” He spoke as he gently coaxed you to your feet. He reached around you, grasping the zipper between his fingers before he slowly dragged the metal down, as the material pooled at your ankles, along with your panties. He had you step out from it before he bent down and picked it up, hanging the dress along the hook on the back of the bathroom door.

“Will you hold me in the tub please?” You asked him softly.

“Of course honey..I was gonna be a gentleman and ask. I didn’t wanna go and assume y’know?”

“Are you trying to make me fall in love with you more than I already have? Cause if that’s the case..it’s totally working.” You watched as he effortlessly pulled his shirt over his head.

“Gasp. You really think I’d do such a thing like that?” He chuckled.

“Don’t lie Miller. You absolutely would do something like that baby.”

“Yeahh, alright. You got me there darlin’”

He scooped you up once more as he carried you to the tub and gently set you down into the soothing water. He discarded the rest of his clothing in a pile before he climbed in behind you. He gently wrapped his arms around you as he brought your back against his chest so you were comfortably laying between his strong thighs. “This alright for you baby?”

“This is perfect.” You let out a content sigh as you rested your head against his chest and placed your hands over his under the water, where they rested comfortably along your stomach.

“M’happy to hear that my sweet girl.” He spoke softly as he rested his chin along your shoulder. “You want me to wash your hair for you as well or just hold you?”

“Oh, please. That would be wonderful, thank you.”

He hummed in response as he reached around you and grabbed your favorite bottle of shampoo. Shortly after, you could feel his fingers working the suds into your hair. He was giving you a full on scalp massage as your eyes fluttered shut.

He had continued to softly hum as he gently scraped his nails against your scalp. He loved these little moments of intimacy that he got to share with you.

Once your hair was washed, he gently tipped your head back into the water before he washed the shampoo suds out of your hair.

You were in a state of complete bliss with your boyfriend taking care of you like this. It was wonderful to have him here with you. Your head still pounded painfully but it was nothing a little aspirin couldn’t fix. “Hey, Joel?”

“Yeah baby? What’s up?”

“Never let me go out drinking like that again.”

“Baby..you said the same thing last weekend..” he chuckled.

You muttered something incoherent under your breath as you turned around between his legs to look up at him. “Shhh. I know what I said last weekend but I’m serious. Don’t let me do that again because I feel like dog shit.”

He was gently grasping your chin between his fingers, brushing the pad of his thumb across your plush lower lip. “M’sorry you’re still feelin’ like shit baby. You and I both know your girlfriends are gonna be textin’ you next weekend and askin’ you to go out. Maybe just don’t drink as many vodka crans next time?”

“Hmm..next time I’ll bring you out with me. You can be my moral support..” you said with a grin, leaning in for a kiss.

“Ohh I’d love that. I’ll make sure you’re being good. Still want you to have fun though..Kay sugar?” He removed the pad of his thumb from your lips and replaced it with a kiss.

His kiss was sweet, warm, and comforting.

“If your head is still hurtin’ real bad..I think I might have a solution for you baby. Only if you’re interested..”

“What did you have in mind, baby?” You mumbled against his lips, kissing him languidly.

“Considerin’ I’m a real gentleman and don’t wanna see my girl in any pain at all, I can ease your mind off of it..”

You breathed a soft sigh against his lips as you relaxed against his warm chest. “You wanna get my head spinning in a different way?..”

“Yeah. I’d love to if you’d let me.” He breathed out as he gently cupped your cheek in his warm palm, stroking his thumb against your cheekbone comfortingly.

“Yes please.” You whispered

“Sit back between my thighs, baby. Get nice and comfortable, okay? Gonna take care of you..” he whispered as he broke away from the kiss.

You slowly turned back around so you were resting against his chest once more. You could feel his breath tickling the shell of your ear as he pressed a soft kiss to your pulse point.

Your eyes slowly fluttered shut as you felt the pad of his fingertips dip down between the valley of your breasts and over your navel. Your thighs instinctively fell open as his fingers brushed over your clit, eliciting a soft sigh to slip past your lips.

His fingers began to move in gentle circles against your clit as he continued to press soft kisses along your neck.

He didn’t apply nearly as much pressure against your sensitive bundle of nerves as he usually would. His movements were gentle, tender as he coaxed you into a soothing orgasm with just his fingers alone. “Shh..that’s it. That’s my good girl. I’ve got you baby, it's okay. You’re such a good girl for me.” He whispered against your skin as your hips bucked up against his hand as you chased your impending orgasm.

“Joellll.” You let out a sweet, soft moan as your eyes rolled back into your skull.

“I know baby..I know. Feels good doesn’t it? I love playing with your pretty little pussy like this..always know how to get her purring for me..”

“You’re the devil..” you breathed out as he continued to gently ruin you with his fingers. Once the sensation became too much and your thighs were trembling, you grabbed his hand, interlocking your fingers together as you came down from your high. Your mind was all fuzzy and didn’t hurt nearly as much now.

“Too much?” He let out a soft chuckle seeing that you were spent in his arms.

“Just a little..but I loved it. Thank you baby.”

“Anything for my girl.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

Once the water was no longer comfortable, and yours and Joel’s skin was pruning up, he gently helped you out of the tub and wrapped a nice fluffy towel around your body.

He had some comfy sweats and a hoodie waiting for you as he helped you get dressed and carried you back to the couch. He let you sit between his thighs once more while you used him as your own personal pillow. You napped together for the rest of the afternoon. He made sure you drank water every now and then and when you were feeling a little better, he even made you some soup.

Joel Miller made your hangover, and the Sunday Scaries, not so scary anymore. Despite this, you still called off work the next morning, and your boyfriend happily spent the night at your place with you between his arms.

[josibunn]

can we have a full simp euro fic pretty please? i lovedddd the drabble

simp euronymous x reader who has an occasional soft spot for him :P euro calling u mama in a beastboy way btw

tl: @vanlisbon @sugarinte @monkeyfart @444rockstargf @bambi-horror @u1trear0tic @auggiethecreator @bluemercy2 @lankysimp @wonkinoo

euronymous and that imaginary leash you have him on, he’s following you around a mall, moreso being dragged, you’re clutching his hand as you’re pulling him into store after store, draining him of his pockets. he doesn’t care though, he loves the fashion shows you put on for him and he loves showing you off in whatever he gets you.

“we just came from this store, doll,” he reminds you. currently, you were searching for this dress, last time you were here you saw this cute strapless pink dress in display things, and you searched top and bottom for it, euronymous doing his best to help you, even though his hands were full of bags, your bags.

“I know that smartass,” you snap, starting to get impatient and lose hope. “then why are we back?? baby I don’t think the dress is here,” he stops in his tracks, and you huff, spinning around to face him, your arms crossed and toes tapping the floor in your little kitten heels. “well it doesn’t hurt to try and look! you saw it it was really cute!” you whine, and your hopeless, pouty expression has him wanting to whine like a puppy.

(he didn’t like the dress too much actually, it didn’t put him at ease when you tried it on; the fabric was too thin and he could see your nipples through it, not to mention how short it was, barely reaching your fingertips. but it made you happy, and who was he to tell you what and what not to wear?)

“well…let’s ask a worker, kay? and if not we’ll just come back another time.” he followed you to the counter, standing to the side. “do you guys still have that pink, strapless mini dress that was on the mannequin a few days ago? real little and it was like a light pink?”

you start to frown when the worker tells you it’s out of stock, saying it bought out fast two days after you came. “is there anything like it? anything similar?” øystein steps up, and you follow with a mean look, arms crossed and heels clacking angrily as you follow behind.

“see? they have somethin’ like it,” he takes a dress off the rack and holds it up to you, laughing lightly at your poked lip. “it’s funny? it’s fuckin’ funny, you asshole??” you snap, and he chuckled a little some more, shaking his head.

“no baby no, y’just look so cute when you’re all mad and pouty like this,” he brings his hand up to cradle your face but you smack his hand away, then smack his chest, which makes him laugh some more.

“i’m just tryna help!” “yer’ laughing at me!” you say as he winds down, coming to a stop. “m’sorry baby yknow I don’t mean it, just wanna help you,” he smiles, eyes big and cheeks pink as he comes down. “look at this one, almost the same color and just as short, just how you like it.” he says and you crack a smile.

“does the straps matter? we can cut em.” he didn’t bother looking at the price tag as he held it up to your body. they were the kind of straps that you tie around your neck, “no it’s ok, this is kinda cute too. wait here,” you take it and he follows you to the dressing room, sitting on a bench as he waits for you to come out.

you slip it on, already feeling like crying as you look at yourself in the mirror. you didn’t even have it fully on, the straps hanging over your shoulders as you do a 360, looking at it. “øystein :(,” you call, and he perks up at the sadness in your voice, coming into the changing room with you.

to him it was the exact same just with straps, still a little see through, still short, he didn’t know why you were sad again. “what’s wrong? it looks good right?” he rubs your hips as you two look at you in the mirror, and he can’t help but stare at your hard nipples.

“wha-are you joking?? it doesn’t look right at all!” you whine as you through your arms out, and his brows furrow. “what? it’s the exact same thing, just the straps! and you don’t even have them tied baby,” he moves your hair out the way and ties them, sure that made your boobs perkier but you still felt ugly in it.

“see? look how cute you look in it,” he smiles at you as you turn around, your back to the mirror and your hands on his chest, looking at your backside. “and it makes my ass look saggy..” you frown, your head now on his chest, and he laughs lightly, running his hands down your hips to your ass.

“no it doesn’t baby, it looks good as always,” he kisses the top of your head as he squeezes and grabs your ass, “you don’t have to get it, but you know I will if you do want it, kay? or we can wait till the other one comes back.” he talks as you still have your head buried in his chest, biting his lip as he notices your tiny thong through the dress, grabbing you more.

“whatever,” you shrug, sighing. “so which is it? wanna get it or wait?” he asks, and you look back once more, giving one more look. “are you sure it looks good?” “yes, baby. promise, you know I wouldn’t lie to you.” he grins before kissing you, and you exhale shakily in his mouth when he pulls you closer, feeling his bulge against your lower tummy.

“can I get this dress and the other one if it’s back in stock too?” you ask and he sniffles a laugh, nodding in the kiss, “f’course mama.”

i could continue this if you’d like!! I hope u enjoyed I loooove euro, sftenthese last few ones tho I think I might pause him bc I have more stuff for other characters. mwah mwah ily!

[yeollie-plz]

Cave

Preoutbreak! Joel Miller x GN! Reader (ft. Platonic! Tommy Miller)

Synopsis: Tommy is trying to help you to get together with Joel but Joel thinks you and Tommy are secretly dating.

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings: swearing, Y/N insert, anger, jealousy, sadness, mentions of punching/aggression, kissing, bar settings

Gif credits to owners!

Tommy had noticed pretty quickly that you had a bit of a crush on Joel. You worked in the diner that Joel, Sarah, and Tommy frequented and had gotten to know them a bit. Sarah invited you to her birthday last year and the rest was history.

From day one you had found Joel attractive. He was so ruggedly handsome, a great father, and not to mention good with his hands. Oh, the things he could do with his hands...

You tried not to think about that too much, Joel was your friend and your customer! You needed to be professional! But Tommy was not going to have any of that bullshit. Tommy was convinced he could get you two together.

There was no one Tommy knew better than Joel. He knew when Joel was angry. He knew when Joel was sad. And he sure as hell knew when Joel liked someone.

Although, Tommy didn't know you as well as his brother, he could tell you felt the same. I mean it was kind of obvious when you would stutter and stumble whenever you saw him and stare at him endlessly.

He tried to convince Joel to ask you out but Joel kept his guard up. He denied that he liked you and said he needed to focus on Sarah and not dating. Tommy just rolled his eyes. He tried again for a few weeks after that but Joel wouldn't budge.

So Tommy waved his white flag in surrender (it was actually a pair of his tighty-whities he took off drunk one night) and gave up.

That didn't last long because a month later he was confronting you about your oh so obvious crush.

You tried to deny it, laughing him off. But Tommy saw right through it. All it took was him staring at you in disbelief and you caved, telling him everything.

"Okay fine, yes, I like your brother. Way more than I should." You almost yelled like it was a revelation even to yourself.

"I knew it! Wish that idiot would've listened to me and asked you out."

"He wants to ask me out?" Your head snapped up to read his eyes.

"Yes, but he's too in his own head about it, stubborn bastard."

You nodded, unsure of how to respond.

"Alright I'm gonna help you two love birds get together."

"Really? Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"He'll thank me eventually..." Tommy trailed off a bit, he seemed like he was debating meddling in his brother's love life or not. He shook his head, laughing at himself.

"He will thank me, operation make Joel cave is a go!"

Monday:

On Monday you came to the house to take Sarah to school. You had done this a few times but Tommy knew that if you showed even more interest in the most important person in Joel's life, gold star.

So you knocked on the Miller's door bright and early. There was a noise of something heavy falling and shuffling towards the door.

"Shit, Tommy I told you to just come in." He finally met your eyes. "Oh, Y/N what are you doing here so early?"

"Well, I have a meeting near Sarah's school and I figured maybe we could have a nice drive together. Maybe get her some breakfast on the way?"

He laughed, "She probably already started cooking but I'm sure she'd love a smoothie or somethin'. You're a sweetheart for thinkin' of her."

"Are you kidding? I love that kid! Plus gives me an excuse to come bother you."

Joel's heart warmed when you said you loved Sarah.

He laughed and finally let you through the doorway and into the house. You followed him into the kitchen where Sarah was trying to make herself some breakfast.

"Why do we never have pancake mix?" She was rustling through a cabinet.

"Don't know, but Y/N said she'd get you something if you wanted."

Sarah turned around at the mention of your name. Eyes widening in excitement when she saw you.

"Y/N!" Sarah ran to hug you. You caught her in your arms and held her tight.

When she finally released you, you spoke, "Thought I could take you to school today, kid?"

She nodded quickly saying something about getting her bag and ran up the stairs. Joel laughed from his seat at the table.

Her footsteps echoed through the house as she paraded down the stairs, right as the front door opened. Tommy loudly announced his presence. The two Miller’s found you and Joel in the kitchen.

"This one almost ran me over coming down the stairs. Y/N! Good morning!" He sent a wink your way, acting like he didn't know you were going to be here.

The wink didn't go unnoticed by Joel.

Sarah grabbed your hand, gaining your attention.

"Y/N, if we hurry we can get some pancakes at the diner before school."

You smiled at her, "Good idea! Let's go!" Waving at the boys as Sarah practically dragged you out the door.

Tuesday:

You were at work when the Miller's came in. You greeted them and sat them down, giving them menus even though they would probably order their usual. You were behind the counter when Tommy came up to you.

"So he can't stop talking about how you took Sarah to school. Between both of them you are just about all we talk about actually."

You hummed in response, concentrating on pouring Joel's coffee.

"I convinced him to come here tonight. The more he sees you, the more he wants you. That's the theory at least."

"I'm starting to think you are more invested in this than me."

"No way! I just want to see my brother happy!"

"Uh huh." You laughed at him, gaining a laugh back.

Joel stared at you two, since when did you become so close?

The rest of the night went smoothly, everyone enjoyed their meals. You had given them the check and they were about to leave when Tommy stopped you.

"So Y/N, I have four tickets to the movies this Saturday at four and thought you'd wanna join us."

"Y/N please come!" Sarah pleaded.

"Okay, okay I'll come, but only 'cause you want me to." You said while ruffling Sarah's hair.

Thursday:

Tommy called you after your shift on Thursday. Joel and him were going out. He told you where they would be, when, and said to dress pretty. So here you were standing outside a bar in a black slimming outfit that didn't leave much to the imagination, trying to work up your courage to go inside.

Tommy's scheming was starting the stress you out a bit. No matter how much you liked Joel, this was almost like lying to him and that didn't feel right.

Just as you were about to say fuck it and go home, Tommy walked out the door.

"Y/N! There you are! Joel's getting bored in there and wants to go home."

"Tommy, I just don't know about this."

"It can't be the outfit, you look great Y/N."

"Not the outfit, this whole plan. I feel like I'd be better off just waiting for him to be ready."

"Y/N, no. How long have you had to wait already?"

"Over a year..."

"See! What's a few days of a little teasing gonna hurt? Trust me."

"Okay." You whispered.

"Lets get you inside." Tommy opened the door for you and your eyes immediately fell on Joel.

Tommy patted your shoulder telling you he'd be at the bar. You nodded.

Joel’s stomach twisted at Tommy's touch.

After a deep breath, you made your way over to Joel.

"Hi." You muttered.

"Hi, you look amazing."

"Thanks." Still not having your full confidence.

Joel and you stayed silent for a bit, before Tommy made his way over. He handed you a drink.

Joel sighed, Tommy bought you a drink not him.

"Thank you."

"No problem. Joel, doesn't Y/N look really good tonight?"

Joel nodded. Tommy didn't seem happy with answer and pressed Joel further.

"Well, I think Y/N looks absolutely stunning."

"I'm sure you do." Joel muttered, getting up from his chair aggressively. The leg of it scraping aggressively against the floor, causing you to wince.

The fire that was originally in Joel's eyes cooled a bit when he noticed your reaction. But he was too clouded by the jealousy that he still walked away. Joel paid his tab and left.

"So that didn't work exactly as planned." Tommy said.

"Nope, this is exactly why I didn't want to go through with the plan anymore. I'm sorry Tommy, but I'd rather be pining after Joel than lose him completely." With that you left the bar.

Saturday:

Saturday rolled around but you were no longer feeling up to the movie. You hoped the Miller's had fun but you were prepared to stay home in your pjs and sulk.

Four came and went. You were fully wrapped up in your TV show (and in your blanket) when the doorbell rang. You begrudgingly made your way to the door, unlocking and opening it.

You were met with a very out of breath Joel. He held up a finger as a sign to give him a minute.

When he finally caught his breath he spoke, "I just punched my brother."

You were shocked, why was Joel punching Tommy?

"Wh-why? What happened?"

"I don't really know. He just mentioned you and I punched him."

You gave him a minute to collect his thoughts, motioning him inside. You guided him to the couch and grabbed him a glass of water.

He took a few sips and spoke again, "Are you and Tommy dating?"

Okay, you were shocked again.

"No. No, what made you think that?"

"It just seemed you two had gotten closer recently and you're so pretty and smart and likeable so I figured."

You laughed, hard and loud and for a long time at this.

"You're laughing..."

"I'm laughing because...because Tommy was trying to help me get with you."

"With me?"

"With you dummy! Hanging out with Sarah, trying to get me to the movies with you, making me wear that outfit to the bar."

"I liked that outfit..."

"Not the point! The point is, I like you! And I have for a while now."

"Me too..." He kept just letting his sentences trail off.

"So why didn't you do anything about it?"

"Didn't think I was ready. Didn't think Sarah was ready. But I've decided I'd rather try then see you with anyone else, especially my brother."

You laughed.

"So, you gonna finally kiss me, Miller?"

"You bet your ass I'm gonna."

He pulled you into a deep kiss, letting you go a few seconds later. He rested his forehead on yours.

"You should apologize to Tommy."

He sighed, "I should... maybe thank him too."

[moonlight-prose]

#10 "why are you doing this?" "because I love you" with Joel from the prompt list? The angst potential is limitless but also the fluff ♥️🤌

THE WASTELAND OF A BLEEDING HEART

a/n: i took a small writing break for a few days, but i finally managed to churn out the end of this fic. it's not my best thing i've written. to be entirely honest i don't really like how it turned out, but we live and die by the pen right. i hope you like it babes.

summary: joel's fears began to interfere.

word count: 1.2k+

pairing: joel miller x reader

warnings: not explicit, angsty ass joel, stubborn joel + stubborn reader dynamic, miscommunication (cause...*gestures to joel* yeah), fluff.

You had every right to be mad at him. After what you two had gone through, the way he had been treating you, gave you enough reason. You should be mad at him. But then he looked at you, his lips pulling up into a barely there grin, brown eyes pulling you in, and you knew…the anger would never last.

Until now it seemed.

“Miller!” you called out, jogging to catch up with Tommy, his quick pace a little too fast for even you. “Where’s the fire?”

“No fire,” he smiled, his hands shoved in his pockets to stave off the cold.

“Good.” You should have grabbed your thicker jacket off the back of the chair. Although it never even occurred to you at the time. Not when your mind was going in a million different directions at once. “I’m looking for Joel—”

You stopped at the sight of his expression shifting, quickly being masked by another carefree smile. Yet you could see beneath his facade; caught the glimpse of worry in his eyes that darted away from you. That was the problem with Tommy Miller. He was too easy to fucking read. Which left you in a predicament such as this.

“What happened?” you asked, noticing how he barely even looked at you.

“Joel uh…”

Your brow creased. “Joel what?”

“Listen it wasn’t my idea and if somethin’ is happening between you two—”

“Tommy.”

He sighed, glancing up at the sunlight that seemed to be the only warmth in Jackson. “He told me to take you off the outdoor patrol shift.”

“He—” You felt your chest tighten painfully, that familiar feeling of loneliness settling back in your bones. “Did you…take me off?”

Tommy nodded reluctantly, his eyes never once meeting yours. “Said he didn’t want you to get hurt, and I…well shit I kind of agree with him.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” You felt the burn in your chest begin to spread—an uncomfortable sensation you always hated. “You can’t just take me off patrol when everyone is supposed to—”

Tommy’s eyes finally snapped to you, his lips forming a thin line. “I know you’re pissed, but think about it honey. If Joel loses you…there’s no coming back for him.” He sighed, dipping his head to glance at the icy covered ground. “I’d rather not bring back that version of my brother.”

Pain erupted throughout you, clogging every part of your body until you could feel your heart screaming. Though Tommy wore the face of a sorrowful man, you knew that he had simply taken away your initiative. He made the choice for you just as Joel did without bothering to let you in on any of it. Anger simmered beneath the surface of your pain; the mask you were wearing—clear and free of any emotions.

Somehow that made Tommy’s expression even worse. He would never truly know how hurt you were, because you wouldn’t tell him.

How could you?

“Have a good day Tommy,” you said, your voice void of any emotion.

“Wait—”

You didn’t give him a chance to say anything more, too focused on the fact that Joel had once again made a choice for you. Simply because he believed it was the best option. Part of you wondered where it stemmed from; why he was so adamant on keeping you in the town limits, unwilling to let you go. Except then you began to count. Each person Joel lost, each tragedy he had to endure, all added up to something in the end.

Hours later you found yourself still thinking about it as you attempted to engross yourself in a novel. One you read over and over again, too stubborn to let it go. Maybe that’s where you and Joel were the same. Two people who couldn’t find it in themself to allow change in a world that had already taken away so much.

The familiar creak of the front door brought you back for a brief moment, your anger flickering to life in your chest. Joel simply grinned at the sight of you curled up in a chair, one of his shirts adorning your body. A blanket so old he was worried it was unhealthy to be around, was spread out across your legs. 

Except that’s not what stopped him in his tracks. The glare he felt burn through his chest, plummeting straight down to his stomach, caused him to freeze. His eyes tried to search your steeled expression for an explanation.

“What’s wrong?”

“Tommy let me know today that you told him to take me off the patrol shift.” The ire in your voice surprised you.

His eyes fell shut, a breathy shit leaving his mouth. “I was gonna tell you—”

“He said you didn’t want me to get hurt.”

“That’s true,” he replied, shrugging out of his jacket and draping it over the back of his chair. “Can I explain please honey?”

You stood, letting the book and blanket fall to the floor. “No. You don’t get to make those decisions for me Joel. I’m more than capable of handling myself out there and you more than anyone knows that.”

The step he took forward coupled with the look on his face nearly bent your resolve, but you stood your ground. You were upset with him for a reason.

“I told Tommy to let me tell you first before doing anything rash. Apparently he still doesn’t listen very well.” He sighed, his hands falling to rest at his hips as he saw your guarded demeanor. “I just don’t want anything happenin’ to you.”

“That doesn’t give you the right to make that choice for me,” you said. “I just want to know why. Why are you doing this?”

“Because I love you.” The words were blurted out before he even comprehended them himself. His eyes widened slightly, mouth snapping shut as he waited for your response.

You let out a shaky breath, your hands falling to your sides limply. “What?” you breathed.

Two months ago you had said those exact words to him in the safety of your bedroom. The fear of setting them free continued to linger in the back of your mind. Yet there he was. Finally telling you the one thing he was most scared of—loving you completely…only to one day lose you. That alone broke off a piece of your heart.

“I can’t lose you like I lost her,” he said softly. “I won’t.”

“Joel,” you whispered, finally moving towards him until you were close enough for his hands to reach for you. “You won’t lose me.”

“You don’t know—”

Grasping his face, you pulled him close, his breath washing across your chin. “You won’t lose me. Okay?” He nodded, his lips brushing against yours. “But you have to let me choose for myself.”

“I will,” he replied, giving into your touch, allowing himself to be loved wholeheartedly for the first time since Sarah. “Just promise me you’ll be careful.”

“You got it cowboy.” You smiled, pressing a kiss to the corner of his lips as his laughter washed over you, settling deep in your chest and keeping you warm.

[wingedtrash]

Rick Grimes x Reader

Rick gets busy and accidentally starts neglecting your relationship.

||CW|| None really, just fluff, a little angst mention of cheating (it doesn’t actually happen Ricks a loyal lover)

AFAB/GN reader, reader has no mentioned gender

Rick had been really busy, going on runs, making plans, running Alexandria. Just doing typical leader stuff.

Him doing all of that left barely any time for your relationship, and that was starting to upset you.

At first you tried ignoring it. You understood that he had important things to do, especially to keep everything going and keep everyone alive.

But it was getting to the point that you saw him for (if you were lucky) maximum 30 minutes a day.

He had stopped coming to bed even when he was in Alexandria, always opting to sleep where the planning was going on, or the jobs were located so he was closer and able to be alert.

This started worrying you, the ideas of him cheating started crossing your mind. It was stupid to even think that he would do such a thing, you knew that. Rick was a loyal, trustworthy man, but he still wasn’t putting very much into your relationship at the moment.

You were angry, but you knew you needed to talk to him. You didn’t know when you would be able to do that, or how you would do it without letting your emotions get the best of you.

A couple of days later, you heard the front door open and close, and heavy footsteps walk in. At first you thought it was Daryl who had been in and out of the house for the last couple of days, getting his gear ready for a run, but you soon recognized them to be Ricks.

You were standing at the kitchen island cutting vegetables for a stew Carol was planning on making for dinner.

Rick saw you as soon as he walked in, walking over to you to greet you. “Hey, darlin’.” He mumbled, moving behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist.

“You sound tired.” You said plainly, continuing to cut the vegetables.

“You mad at me?” He asked, loosening his arms around you.

“No-” you paused. Your whole body tensing up beneath his arms.

“Really?” He questioned, and it felt like he knew you were, and why you were.

This made you feel like you had to tell him now. So you did.

“Maybe.” You continued your movements of chopping the vegetables.

“Why darlin’?” He asked calmly, reaching up to rub at your shoulders.

“You’ve been gone for weeks. You haven’t been to bed in what’s felt like forever and you’ve barely spoken to me Rick! I don’t know where you’ve been or what you’ve been doing!” You shout the last sentence out of frustration, dropping the knife onto the cutting board.

"I'm sorry darlin'. I know I've been all over the place recently. Everyone’s always needin’ somethin’ and you know how that goes.” He says, squeezing his arms tighter around you again.

“You could’ve at least came by and updated me on whatever was going on.” You replied, unraveling his arms from you and turning to look at him.

He could see how much it bothered you. Your eyes conveying your emotions more than you would’ve liked them to.

“C‘mere.” He said, grabbing your wrists and guiding you away from the kitchen island. He guided you up the stairs and to your shared bedroom.

“What Rick?” You asked, not knowing exactly what he was getting at. He had turned away from you digging in his side of the dresser.

“Put this on.” He said, suddenly throwing one of his shirts at you.

“Why?” You asked, looking at him confused.

“Just do it.” He responded, pulling out a pair of his sweats.

So you did, when you finished putting on his shirt, you realized he had changed out of his day clothes and into something he would normally sleep in, that being just a pair of sweats and no shirt.

He climbed into the bed, and motioned for you to come over.

“Rick what’re you doing?” You asked again.

“What does it look like sweetheart? I’m tryin’ to make up for missed time.” He responded. “I’m exhausted from the last few weeks, I just wanna hold you.” He added, now doing grabby hands towards you since you hadn’t come over when he motioned.

You finally walked over and joined him, climbing into the bed beside him.

When you did he quickly wrapped his arms around your figure and pulled you into his arms.

You immediately loosened up at the contact, melting into it.

“I missed you, missed this.” He mumbled, nuzzling his face into your neck.

“I did too, but you realize I’m supposed to be getting to veggies ready for Carol right now, right?” You responded pulling away to look at his face.

“They looked ready to me.” He responded with a shrug.

“Well they weren’t, so if she yells at me you’re going to have to save me.” You laugh.

“I will don’t worry.” He responds closing his eyes.

You watched him doze off, he was always handsome in this peaceful state. As time went on you fell asleep shortly after.

This apology still wasn’t exactly enough and he knew that. He was just saving the rest of his apology for when he wasn’t as tired wink wink.

(Part 2 perhaps for the rest of the apology?)

[bookshelf-dust]

Hii, if you're still taking request I wanted to ask if you could write a Gareth fic where he sees the jocks annoying you and steps in (I feel like I'm feeding the 'damsel in distress' stereotype but it's Gareth🥰💞). If you won't or can't write this thank you anyway<33

I also wanted to say I love your work and writing!

my hero.

gareth emerson x gn!reader

word count: 703

warnings: swearing, jason and his goons being assholes, jason carver in general, brief mentions of anxious!reader, fluff

a/n: hi my sweet!! thank you for your request!! this is a really precious concept. i hope it’s to your liking!! i just kind of went for it and this is the result. and thank you for saying that you like my work. it really does mean the world hearing that and i am sending you an enormous hug. enjoy! <333

————

You didn’t need to be saved. You were completely capable of defending yourself—you did it all the time—and you knew that.

But the relief you felt at Gareth’s appearance was palpable.

You were having a shitty day. One of those where everything hurt your feelings, every little thing went wrong.

You’d slept through your alarms and woken up twenty minutes before you needed to leave. Gotten toothpaste on your shirt and had to change it.

Then you’d gotten stuck in traffic because of a wreck and made it into class right as the bell rang, out of breath and a little sweaty despite the freezing temperatures.

You’d been handed back your essay in class and not done nearly as well as you hoped, despite having worked your ass off on it.

Your lunch had been rushed and tasted like shit because you had an anxious stomach ache.

But it all met a peak when you were getting books out of your locker in between classes.

“You look like hell. Do you ever sleep?” Jason Carver’s voice rang out like a shotgun from where he stood next to you. You had the unlucky advantage of his locker being a few down from yours.

You were too frazzled to even answer him. “What, you mute or somethin’ now too?” That was Andy.

You shifted your math textbook. “How’s your mom Andy? She looked like shit when I left her last night.”

Jason moved in, slamming your locker door shut. Good thing you were finished with it.

“You really shouldn’t say things like that. It’s not polite.”

“Fuck off, Jason. Just because you can’t get Chrissy off doesn’t mean you have to take that frustration out on me.”

He blushed a dark shade of red, borderline purple, his brows pushing together angrily. “You’re such a bitch. You know what—”

“What, Carver? What are you gonna do, huh?” Gareth took your books out of your hands, moving behind you to put them in your backpack for you.

Jason crossed his arms, letterman jacket crinkling as he did so. “Just making conversation. What do you want freak?”

Gareth laughed. “Original. So, what’re we chatting about this afternoon?” He crossed his arms, mimicking Jason’s pose and pouting at his fussy expression.

You looked up at him for the first time since he’d appeared. He looked like he always did. Gorgeous. Brown hair fluffy and moving with each turn of his head, shoulders enveloped in a black corduroy jacket. He looked warm.

The ache in your chest that had surfaced when Jason and his goons started bugging you vanished. Gareth was good at that.

“How your friend here is a bitch and could learn a lesson in respecting their higher-ups.”

A shadow crossed Gareth’s face. Asshole, he thought, wrapping his arm around your shoulders.

“Hey, Carver?”

“Yeah?” The blonde looked confused.

“Suck my dick.”

You coughed out a laugh, making Gareth smile and rub his hand over the top of your back before pulling you away.

Clearly, even the idea of that was bothering Jason. He spun around at your retreat. “What the hell is wrong with you? Creep!”

Gareth turned around, grabbing hold of your hand. “Aw, you know you want to. I bet it’d help release some of that tension. Bet Andy’d help you out if you’re not so fond of me!”

Jason flushed that cruel pink again, and Gareth tugged you off in the direction of your next class, which you shared.

He stopped you in the hallway, checking his watch to make sure you had a few minutes. “You okay?” He asked, blue eyes boring into yours.

“Yeah. Thank you, Gareth the Great. My hero.” He shook his head at you in disapproval, but it was hard to take him seriously with that cheesy ass grin on his face.

“You’re such a shit.” He leaned in and kissed the top of your head, lips warm and curls brushing your skin, just as the bell rang.

He made sure to wave at Jason in the parking lot after school, which only caused a more violent blush than before and a slam of a car door. Gareth, however, laughed in triumph and practically jumped he was so giddy.

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

[lunajay33]

Hope Part.4🧟‍♀️

Summary: After Daryl was taken away by Negan for months he finally escaped and was reunited with y/n, now is time to work out all the details with the baby coming soon but things don’t go as planned

•Masterlist•

I was 9 months pregnant now and the last two months with Daryl have been everything I could’ve dreamed of, I was just glad he was here for the last few months of the pregnancy and for when I give birth

(Im gonna skip over some stuff just so it goes with my story, just go along with it)

“Daryl?” I asked as I rolled over in bed but he wasn’t there, I got up and looked all around the house and I couldn’t find him

I ran out of the house looking everywhere, the pantry, the look out, everywhere

“DARYL?” I screamed starting to panic

“Oh no no no” the tears were streaming down my face and I felt like I couldn’t breath

What if he never came back, what is this was all a dream and he was still with Negan and was never here

I sank to the ground, crying as all these horrible thoughts ran through my head

“Y/n? What wrong?” I looked up and it was Carol

“Carol, I can’t find Daryl, he’s gone, was it all a dream and he never came back” she kneeled down and wiped away my tears but they just kept falling

“Come on, come with me sweetie” Carol always treated me with such kindness

We walked towards Aaron’s house and around the back to see the garage open, that’s when I saw him working on a bike

He looked up at me and smiled but that quickly went away when he saw I was crying

He was in front of me in an instant

“Baby what’s wrong, are ya hurt?” He asked as he brushed my hair back and wiped my tears away just like Carol did

“I woke up and you were gone, I..I couldn’t find you anywhere and I thought….” I didn’t wanna say it, it was so embarrassing but Carol said it for me

“She thought it was a dream that you came back she thought you never came back” she said giving Daryl a look I couldn’t figure out, they always had their own way of talking

“Oh baby I’m so sorry, you’ve been so tired lately with the pregnancy that I wanted to let ya sleep in, I’m sorry I scared ya” he said as he pulled me into a hug

I hide my face in his chest and holding him tight just wanting to stay here with him forever

“Didn’t know this would still scare ya” he stated

“Im always scared that once you leave you’ll never come back and I won’t have you again” I said feeling the tears begin to bubble in my eyes again

“Ya should have told me”

“Im sorry, I just didn’t want to stress you out more I know you’re really stressed with all the walkers in that pit you guys have to deal with” I said looking up at him

“That’ll all be over after today hopefully, but still ya should’ve told me, you’re my number one forever, I don’t care what I have going on always tell me if somethins bothering ya okay?”

“Okay I will” I say smiling as he leaned down and pulled me into the sweetest kiss

“Ya know I love ya”

“I know, I love you too handsome” and I said a little blush form on his cheeks, it happens everytime I call him that and it’s the cutest thing

“Daryl, Rick is ready to go he wanted me to get you” Carol said as she called out, I didn’t even notice her leave

“I gotta go know but I’ll come back to ya, I always will” he smiles as we walk to where everyone is gathering at the gate

He gets on his bike and starts it up

I gave him one last kiss and pulled something out to give him making sure he comes back

“Here, just something to hold onto just in case something happens” I handed him a ultrasound picture that I have been holding onto for a long time, forgetting to show him

“Baby, nothing will happen” he said smiling at the picture as he placed it in his pocket

“But just in case” I smiled as he squeezed my hand and they each drove off one by one until Rick was the last one

“Please make sure he’s okay, no matter what happens, make sure you both come back safely” I asked

“Ill bring him home y/n, now go rest that baby is gonna pop any day now” he smiled then drove off and the gates were closed

I couldn’t sit alone and think about him all day, I’d go crazy so I decided to find Carol and stay with her today

I walked into the kitchen of her place to see her baking cookies

“Hey Carol would it be okay if I spent the day with you?” I asked as I sat at the island

“Of course dear, I’m gonna be working around so hopefully it helps distract you”

“Thanks Carol”

We ate some cookies then walked to the garden and worked there for a few hours that’s when a huge sound rang through the town

I stayed close to Carol and that’s when we saw the watch tower fall crushing one of the walls

We saw people rushing in killing people in the streets, I felt frozen until Carol grabbed my hand and led us to the infirmary with Denise, a few others were in there already

“Y/n you stay here do not leave no matter what” carol said as she ran out the door

The others blocked the door and windows, leaving a little slit to check outside

“Something went wrong out there” I said panicking all over again

“Hey we just have to stay calm and wait” Rosita said as she sat me down and the infirmary bed that’s when I felt a gush of water run down my legs

“Oh god no please not now” I cried

“Y/n your water broke” Denise said

“I can’t do this, I need him here, I can’t do it without him” I said feeling like the universe was against me

“It will be okay he’ll make it” Aaron said as he rubbed my arm

“Here change into this” Denise said as she handed me a medical gown

She closed the curtain around the bed and Rosita helped me change, she was one of my best friends so I didn’t care, I turned and she tied up the string on the back of the gown

For the next few hours we just heard groans from the walkers that filled the streets outside which didn’t help me relax

My contractions were getting stronger but Denise said I was still a ways away from beginning to push

It was dark outside now and Daryl still wasn’t back none of them were that was until Aaron started unlocking the door

“Aaron what the hell are you doing?” Rosita asked

“Its Rick and Michonne, somethings wrong with Carl” they burst in and laid Carl in the bed next to mine

“Oh god” I said feeling faint

His eye was gone, Rick was freaking out and he left doing gods know what, but if he was back then where was Daryl

I sat up and let my legs hang over the bed, just trying to breath but the noises around me was making everything worse

Rosita came in front of me and placed headphones over my ears that was connected to a little Walkman

I smiled at her thankfully, she always knew what I needed

I let the music calm me down as I closed my eyes imagining that Daryl was next to me right now, to help me through this pain

Another hour went by and Denise finished patching Carl up but I was growing more uncomfortable and I knew it was time to push, I wanted Daryl but I had to do this for my little girl

“Denise its time, I have to push” i stated preparing myself for the pain

I sat up as she got ready between my legs and Rosita held my hand with Aaron ready next to Denise incase she needs an extra pair of hands

“Okay y/n push” I pushed with all I could and the pain was excrutiating but I couldn’t make a noise or the walkers would come

I pushed 3 more times and that’s when all the pressure released and I heard her cries

Denise laid her on my chest, I looked down at her and she was beautiful and she immediately calmed down when she was in my arms

“Oh y/n she’s adorable” Rosita whispered as she cleaned the sweat off my face

She was a perfect mix of me and daryl, dark hair, blue eyes, she was just beautiful I couldn’t look away from her

“Im gonna clean her up okay, you should rest” Rosita said as she took her from my arms

“Be gentle please” I whispered as I passed out from exhaustion

When I woke up I saw a little baby bin next to my bed

I sat up and pulled it close to see her all fresh and sleeping, wrapped in a blue blanket

“How long have I been asleep?” I asked Rosita as she was sat next to the bed

“Not long about an hour”

“He’s still not back?” I asked

She just shook her head

I picked her up out of the bed and she whined, I pulled down my gown and let her feed for a while until she was full and she slowly fell back asleep

“So what will you name her?” Rosita asked

“Im not sure yet, I wanna wait for Daryl” that’s when the door bursted open and it was Daryl

“Daryl, you’re back” I smiled still tired

“Fuck, I can’t believe I missed this” he grunted as he came and sat next to me on the bed

“Isnt she beautiful Daryl” I said as he looked down at her in my arms

He was silent, as I placed her in his arms and I saw him start to cry

“Thank you, thank you for giving me this amazing gift” he said looking back at me

“I wish you were here, but I’m glad you came back” I said pulling him into a strong kiss

“Ill be here for the next one” he smirked

“What’re we gonna name her?” I asked

“What about…….Harlow?” He said

“I love it, our little Harlow”

(Guys lmk how you liked this story!!:))

Taglist: @itsmytimetoodream

[whatisreggieshortfor]

First Words

You’re born with the first words your soul mate says in your presence. Yours enlightened you to realize something about yourself along the way.

Atsumu x trans!m!reader

Dedicated to @littlexbimbo for letting me bounce ideas off him 💛

No matter what your arm said, you doubted you’d ever meet your soul mate.

Your life had consistently been a mess from the beginning, your soul mate probably belonged to the person that was supposed to get your body at birth. You were born in the wrong one.

You’d known from an early age. You never felt a girl, never felt comfortable in dresses like your friends, never felt happy when your relatives would say you were beautiful, and you hated being told to be ladylike.

When you were in middle school, you found the term. Transgender. Suddenly the words scrawled on your arm made sense.

It took arguing, with your parents, with the school board, with your teachers, but you were finally, finally, going to be referred to as a male student.

Your old friends from middle school cut ties for the most part, some had said that you were changing just because of your soul mate words, but you ignored them. You’d felt happier in the last year of middle school than you had the rest of your life.

High school was better. Most of the students didn’t know who you were, so they didn’t have that opinion, or really any opinion in the matter. And then you decided to join the community at your school. The club wasn’t big, or even considered a legitimate club by a lot of the teachers, but there were a couple that would defend the students who joined. You became the president during your first year because other members were afraid of having that label. You wore it proudly.

You only really had friends in the club, not trusting other students to drop your friendship when they learned the truth. And so went your life at Inarizaki.

For a year, you didn’t invest yourself in anything but the pride club and schoolwork. But when you started your second year it was like you couldn’t stop hearing about the volleyball club. Supposedly the Wonder Twins™️ were in your year, but you could never remember meeting them, which didn’t bother you. You figured they couldn’t be hard to miss with the way people talked about them.

But you were wrong.

You had been walking to school, not paying much attention as you stared up at the clouds, when you tripped over your own feet and thudded into someone’s back. The boy groaned while the one next to him started laughing. “Sorry!” You offered. “My own two stupid feet. If I don’t watch them, they trip everyone!”

You didn’t notice the two boys freeze at your words before you settled back onto your heels and walked away.

Two periods into school, you heard rumors that someone was looking for you. Or more specifically, the guy you ran into earlier was trying to find the person that collided with him. You weren’t particularly excited to tell people it was you, it wasn’t worth getting your ass kicked over running into someone. You almost made it through the day without issue. Until you went to use the bathroom.

“L/N? Shouldn’t you be using the girls room?”

You rolled your eyes to yourself upon hearing one of the very few people that remembered you from middle school. You started turning around, about to snap back when a voice cut you off, “Ya blind or somethin’? That’s a guy.” Your eyes immediately skidded over to the boy that stood there, glaring down at your bully, and you couldn’t get your mouth to work. Eventually the bully gave up on the stare down and stomped off, leaving you gaping at your rescuer. He turned to you with a sigh, “I been lookin’ for ya all day, ya know?”

You tugged your sleeves further down your wrists, “Do we know each other?”

“Naw, not yet.” You narrowed your eyes at him, and he looked almost nervous, “Ya actually ran into ma brother earlier.”

“Listen, I’m not trying to fight you guys-“

“Wha-? No, no, it’s what ya said when it happened.” He held his arm out, shirt sleeve pulled up, words glaring at you, ‘Sorry! My own two stupid feet. If I don’t watch them, they trip everyone!’

“Sorry. I don’t…have words.” The guy deflated, almost like he’d been building himself up for this moment and he was exceedingly let down…or maybe relieved?

“Alrighty. Sorry to bother ya.”

Before you could stop yourself, you asked, “What was your name, by the way?”

“Atsumu. Miya Atsumu.”

A few minutes later, you stood in front of the bathroom sink, staring down at the words on your arm, ‘Ya blind or somethin’? That’s a guy.’ You shook your head, “I’m sorry, Atsumu. You’re better off if you don’t know.”

You couldn’t stop seeing him after that. It was like you every time you turned around, there he was. You decided that maybe another activity would take your mind off lying to your soul mate, so you allowed your counselor to set up a meeting with a team captain that was looking for a manager.

You wished you had changed your mind before you entered the gym.

Kita was nice enough, introducing you to the team and explaining it was going to be a test run of your skills to see if you could handle the job. But you didn’t expect to find Atsumu there.

Looking back, it would have made sense, if you had ever bothered to learn the names of the Wonder Twins™️. Now every day you made sure the sleeves of your club jacket were pulled down over your arms, which most people didn’t question. Even when wearing short sleeved shirts, more often than not the words would still be covered until their person was found. People were worried that someone would just read their words out loud, and then those first meetings would be confusing. So the team didn’t ask you about it. And you didn’t tell. You couldn’t help but notice though, Atsumu left his out in the open. Some of the team had commented that he didn’t used to, but he never addressed why he stopped hiding them. You’d witnessed more than a few times that his fangirls would trip over themself in an over the top dramatic way and say the words to him when they landed at his feet. His response was always the same, gruffly telling them to be more careful before he walked away. The girl would pout about it, and the next one in line would try her luck. You’d always heard that he was a flirt, but you never saw it, and he’d had plenty of opportunities to showcase it.

Something you didn’t take into account when you started managing the club is how the soul mate bond can make you fall for each other, whether you try or not. In the two months since you joined, you’d seen Atsumu thriving on the court, like most of the people that liked him, but you also saw more than that. You saw him get into stupid fights with his brother, saw the multitude of videos that Suna had for blackmail, saw him whine about being hungry, angry when his sets aren’t hitting right, confused about homework, cracking jokes at nobody’s and everybody’s expense. There weren’t many facets of Atsumu that you didn’t know anymore.

You started getting concerned when he started working himself even harder than normal. Volleyball was his life, you knew that. You didn’t quite understand it, but you accepted it. Seeing him in the gym two hours after practice should have ended was starting to weigh on you. At first you chalked it up to being stuck there until he finished, and then you started seeing how raw he was pushing his hands.

“Miya, you need to rest.”

“Can’t.” He didn’t pause, moving right back to his serving practice. You sighed at the response. Since that day in the hallway, he barely says five words to you at a time.

You stood in front of him, watching him huff in frustration as you got in the way, “Can you at least take a break and let me tape your fingers? If you keep going like this, it won’t be long before you can’t go anymore.” He didn’t seem to like the statement, pulling a mildly bothered face before he nodded. You pulled him to the bench, getting to work as you closely examined the damage he’d been doing, “You’re gonna need to ice your fingers tonight, okay?” You glanced up to realize he’d been looking anywhere but you. “You okay, Atsumu? I know volleyball is important, but why are you hurting yourself for it?”

“Have to.” You waited, hoping that just this once, he’d give you more than that. But when it became clear he wouldn’t, you asked.

“Why do you have to? You’re one of the top setters in Japan.”

“I need ta be the best.” He still wasn’t looking at you, and you didn’t think he was even aware of the slight grip he took on your fingers, until his eyes suddenly snapped to yours, “I need ta push myself so that I can deserve ma soul mate.”

“I-“ You froze with wide eyes before you shook your head, turning back to his fingers, “Don’t be an idiot. If your soul mate can’t appreciate you without you needing to hurt yourself, then they are the one who’s not deserving. You’re a really good guy, Atsumu. Don’t think you need to change.”

“Clearly I do. Soul mate don’t want me.”

You replied quietly, more to yourself, “Maybe it’s that they want you too much, you big idiot. They don’t want you to suffer for being with them.”

“Shouldn’t I get ta decide that?” You felt the pang to your heart as he moved away from you, slowly tearing down the net and putting the balls away. The conversation faded away.

The day after you had a plan, but you were juggling with the idea of backing down. You felt guilty. Atsumu was insecure about the soul match and you could’ve helped him feel better but you didn’t. Practice rolled around as classes let out, and you stiffly pulled your jacket off, folding it onto the bench. The players took notice immediately, watching as you picked up your clipboard. Two sets of eyes focused on your revealed words, one with no thought to anything else.

As you moved about your daily actions, you could feel the eyes burning into you, and you braced yourself as you began to pass out their water bottles. Words on clear display as you held out Atsumu’s last, watching as he processed exactly what he was seeing. “I don’t know how you could think someone wouldn’t want you, you moron. Wha- Hey! Atsumu!” He didn’t reply as he tossed the bottle down, grabbing your arm and hauling you over his shoulder to take you outside of the gym.

“Why did you lie to me?”

You fiddled with your fingers after he set you down, figuring he deserved the truth, “I didn’t want to, okay? It just slipped out. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to deal with the shit I have to.”

“Shouldn’t I get a say in that?”

“I know. But-“ your hands flailed, “I’m not like you! Okay? You weren’t born in the wrong body, with a daily reminded on your arm that you aren’t right. I was trying to keep you from that.”

You watched the faux blonde sigh, “Aren’t right? Do you even know how perfect you are?” With wide eyes you stared at his soft smile, “Ya ain’t like me, but that don’t mean that ya aren’t right. Ya put up with me and ‘Samu fightin’, you can get Suna ta wake up and practice, Kita ‘nd Aran practically wanna adopt ya. Ya got a whole family in there that wanna help you when someone makes ya feel wrong. Ya just gotta let us in. Let me in. Because I’m not going anywhere now that I found ya.”

“Aren’t you bothered? That I was born-“

“You were born ta be exactly as ya are. Don’t let anyone tell ya different.” You hugged him as he smiled, and no one on the team questioned it when the two of came back with hands held.

Atsumu’s fangirls had been annoyed, some going damn near feral, when the news spread around the school, but the team never let you face it alone. Atsumu even took it upon himself to act as your bodyguard, while simultaneously boosting the popularity for your pride club. When you asked why he cared about it, he would just grin and say it was because his soul mate did.

Masterlist

[finnsbubblegum]

I Don’t Deserve You {Part 2} (Joel Miller x Reader)

Pairing: post-outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

Warnings: fluff, protective joel, age gap (reader is in her 20s and Joel is in his 50s), stalking, sexual assault attempt (lmk if i missed any)

Summary: You were popular in Jackson but you have been single your whole life. Despite many men flirting with you, you have never found your ideal type. Until one day, you saw Joel and you fell in love at first sight.  But he felt insecure.

Words count: 2.9k 

A/N: This is part 2 for I Don’t Deserve You Part 1. Thank you to everyone who read my fanfic! 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

It was a usual Monday after the night Joel saved you from Josh. You woke up early and got ready to work and meet your students. 

“Good morning, kids! How was your weekend?” You asked the students with a soft tone.

“I watched a movie with my dad last night!” A girl shouted.

“It was my birthday yesterday!” Another girl shouted.

They were active and you were always happy to listen to their stories. Their stories were always interesting to you. You loved how children were so pure and innocent. 

“Oh really? Well, happy birthday to you! Why don’t we all sing happy birthday to Samantha?” 

You invited the other students to sing the Happy Birthday song for Samantha. Each of the students followed your clap and sang the Happy Birthday song together. The day went and it was already time for the class to be dismissed. 

“Okay everyone! Class is dismissed! Don’t forget to do your homework!”

Everyone was packing their bags hurriedly and you glanced at the door. The door had a rectangle transparent glass and you saw Joel. When he caught your eye, he quickly hid. You found him so cute and felt butterflies in your stomach. It felt like you were in your teenage years all over again. You shook your head and smiled. The kids were starting to leave one by one and you began to pack your stuff on the table. 

“I saw you there Joel.” You teased Joel who was still hiding.

“Uhm.. Sorry.” He slowly walked inside the class and cleared his throat.

“You caught me.” He smiled shyly and put his hand on the nape of his neck.

“Are you stalking me now?” You joked.

“Absolutely not. I was just around and thought I’d stop by to see how you’re teaching the kids. Hope you didn’t teach them curse words.” He joked remembering his last joke at the bar that was cut off by Josh’s appearance.

“Of course not.” You scoffed and slightly hit his chest. 

“Are you heading home now?” Joel put his hands on his waist.

“Yes, all the kids have gone home so I should go home now.”

“I’ll walk you home.” Joel gestured a movement from his hands as if he was asking you to follow him.

“Sure. Thank you.” You grabbed your purse and jacket.

Joel wasn’t actually around the area. He was not patrolling that day and couldn’t keep thinking about last night. He was worried that Josh might come to you and bother you again. After thinking about it for a few hours, he decided to visit you at school and walk you home. He thought that it was the least thing he could do to protect you. Without realizing it, he was starting to have feelings towards you. 

“Do you want to come in and have dinner with me tonight? I can cook something for us.” You hoped Joel would say yes before you got in your house.

“Sure. Ellie is making friends now so she often stays out late.” 

“Great. Come in.” You welcomed Joel.

You hung your jacket and Joel did the same. 

“Please make yourself at home while I cook dinner.” You smiled at Joel.

Joel nodded and sat on the sofa in your living room. You walked to your kitchen, opened your fridge and took out some ingredients. 

“Can I help you with somethin’?” Joel suddenly stood up and walked towards you.

“No, no. I’m good. Let me serve you dinner tonight.” Joel was your guest so you wanted to serve him.

“Okay.” Joel walked away and started to look around your house.

“You have a lot of books.” Joel stopped at your bookshelf.

“Oh, yes. I love to read. I’m a teacher.” You laughed.

“Right.” Joel chuckled.

After a few moments of banter while you were preparing dinner, you were finally done.

“Dinner’s ready.” You called for Joel.

He looked back from the sofa and hurried his way to the dining table.

“Smells good.” He sniffed.

You both started eating. You were nervous because you were scared Joel might not like your cooking. And your legs were shaking under the table.

“Hmm.. It’s delicious. Thank you.” Joel praised your food.

“Phew.. I was scared you didn’t like it.” You sighed.

“Are you kidding? This is the best meal I’ve ever had in the past 20 years.” He chuckled as he shoved another spoonful of your cooking.

“Thank you, Joel. You’re really sweet.” You were touched hearing his words.

The two of you had conversations as you finished your dinner. 

“Let me wash the dishes. You cooked so I will wash the dishes.” Joel offered.

“Sure.” You gave your dishes to Joel.

You watched him from behind and got lost in your fantasy. You were imagining a life where you and Joel lived under the same roof as family. And you were the wife making dinner for your husband when he got off from work. He looked dashing from behind and his shoulder was broad. You imagined how it would feel kissing him. But you didn’t want to rush so you had to hold yourself. You hit your head and got back to reality. 

“Done.” Joel wiped his hands with a towel.

“Thank you, Joel. For washing the dishes.” 

“It’s nothin’. You cooked for me so it’s fair if I wash the dishes.” He shook his head.

You wondered how a man like him treated you so nice. You kept wondering why he didn’t come into your life sooner. Then you remembered why. You were half his age. But you didn’t care. As long as he made you happy, you didn’t care about anything.

You and Joel spent a few hours hanging out at your house then it was time for him to go home.

“I should probably head home.” Joel looked at you.

“Yeah, sure. Thank you for walking me home today.”

“Anytime. Thank you for the meal. It was delicious.” Joel thanked you.

You chuckled as you walked him to your door and grabbed his jacket.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Joel raised his eyebrows.

“Sure. See you tomorrow.” You waved your hand goodbye to Joel.

The next day, Joel came and picked you up from work. He walked you home and had dinner with you for the second day, third day, fourth day, and it went on and on. Except when it was his turn to go on patrol, he couldn’t walk you home. But he would always tell you in advance if he couldn’t walk you home. 

Joel and you often hung out in the city as well. Since you got close with Joel, Josh had never shown up. He just stared at you from afar but he had never approached you. You even had less guys flirting with you. As time went by, people were starting to recognize your relationship with him. People were making rumors and talking about you and Joel. They were talking about how far your age gap was and how Joel didn’t deserve you. He was old and ruthless but you were young and kind. You didn’t care what anyone said. Joel had never hurt you, he was always respectful, he was definitely not like what other people said. As a matter of fact, Joel had never been kind to anyone but you. 

Your feelings towards Joel have grown deeper and deeper. On the other side, you had no idea how Joel felt towards you. Did he like you or did he just see you as a kid who needed protection? But you didn’t want this to end so you kept your feelings hidden until it was 2 months since you and Joel spent time together. You couldn’t hold your feelings hidden any longer.

It was another usual dinner with Joel. You watched him as he was walking outside your front porch. 

“Joel.” You stopped him before he walked his way home.

“Huh?” He raised his eyebrows and looked back.

“Can I ask you something?” You wiped your sweaty hands to your jeans.

“Sure. What is it?” He walked his way back to your porch where you were standing, resting his hands on the handrail.

“What are we, Joel? I mean - I - I like you, Joel.” You confessed your feelings to Joel and stepped closer to him.

Instead of telling you the way he felt about you, he took a step back. 

“No.” His voice was really low, he shook his head and looked down.

Your eyes were getting blurry as tears welled up in your eyes. 

“I’m sorry.” Joel quickly walked away from you.

“Joel.. Please..” You tried to stop him but you thought it was better to stay.

You were heartbroken. You went to your bedroom, covered your face with your pillow and cried all night.

On his way home, Joel was also heartbroken. He couldn’t see you cry like that, especially because of him. He regretted leaving you hanging like that. He wished he could hug you and comfort you. But he knew he shouldn’t. He had heard the rumors and he agreed to what people were saying. He regretted treating you nice if it would end up breaking your heart. He shouldn’t give you hope in the first place. Since then, Joel started avoiding you. He didn’t walk you home and didn’t have dinner with you. You and Joel ended just like that.

You hadn’t seen Joel since. Your days went so slow. Days felt weeks, weeks felt months, months felt years. It has been a month and you hated this feeling. You wanted closure so you decided to find Joel. You walked to his house and knocked on his door.

“Hi!” It was Ellie.

“Uhm.. Hi! Is Joel home?” You asked Ellie.

“Yeah! Joel! Someone’s here looking for you!” Ellie shouted and called Joel.

Joel made his way down stairs and his eyes widened when he saw you at his front door.

“We need to talk, please.” You begged Joel.

“Okay.” Joel gestured to Ellie to go, he closed the door and invited you to sit on the patio chairs at his front porch.

You sat with him but he didn’t say anything. So you started the conversation.

“Did I do something wrong, Joel?” You tried to find what was wrong to fix your relationship with him.

“No.” He replied coldly.

“It’s okay. Just tell me, Joel. Let me fix us.” You begged him.

“It’s not you. It’s me.” Joel wanted the best for you.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. What do you mean?” You were confused.

“I know you heard about the rumors. They were right. I don’t deserve you. I’m old. I’ve done bad things. I’ve killed people. And you’re young, beautiful…inside out, kind, perfect and everythin’. You deserve someone way better than me. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have started anythin’ with you. I realized I was crossin’ the line, that's why it’s better that I stopped before I hurt you more.” Joel put his elbow on his knees as he explained to you.

“That’s not right. I don’t care what people say, Joel. You treated me so nice. You’ve never hurt me. You protect me, Joel.” You shook your head in denial.

“Don’t you get it? I don’t deserve you.” Joel started to raise his voice.

“No, Joel. Please. Give me a chance. I can’t live without you. Please. Give us a chance.” You cried as you begged him.

Joel wanted to cry but he held it. He didn’t want to look weak. Instead he stood up and asked you to leave. 

“I promise I won’t see you again.” Joel’s words made your heart even wretched.

“Joel, please..don’t..Can you at least give me a hug as a goodbye? Please?” You grabbed his wrist.

Joel wanted to hug you. He really did. But it would just make him change his mind. If he hugged you, he might not be able to let you go. So he let go of your hand and walked inside his house. You cried so loud and kneeled in front of his door. Hoping for Joel to come out and change his mind, but a few hours went by and he didn’t appear. You were getting hopeless so you decided to go home. You cried on your walk and you didn’t realize someone was following you. You grabbed your keys and went inside your house. Someone was holding your door before you closed it. 

“Joel?” You hoped Joel was following you home.

“Nuh-uh baby. It’s me. Josh.” Josh smirked.

You gasped and started to shake. 

“Wh-what are you do-doing?” Josh could hear you were scared.

“I told you that old man is no good, baby. You should have been with me in the first place. I wouldn’t make you cry. I’m way better than him. That old man knows it. He really doesn’t deserve you. But I deserve you.” It turned out that Josh had been stalking you and he was eavesdropping your conversation with Joel.

“No. Josh. Please get out of my house.” You tried to act like you were not scared but he could see you were shaking.

“I’m not going anywhere, baby. You’re mine now.” Josh claimed you as his because he knew Joel wouldn’t be there to protect you from him anymore.

“No, please go.” You walked backwards as he slowly walked towards you.

On the other side, Joel kept thinking about what he had said to you. He knew it was for the best but somehow he felt something weird in his heart. He guessed maybe he should have hugged you goodbye. He didn’t hear your cries anymore so he decided to walk to your house. He saw your door was left open and he heard a loud thud and your scream. Joel’s heart was beating faster as he rushed inside your house.

“Stay still!” Josh was on top of you, holding your hands, trying to take off your pants.

“Josh, stop it!” You tried to push Josh away but he was too heavy.

Joel’s eyes widened as he was shocked to see what was happening. He ran towards you, grabbed Josh from behind and threw him aside. Josh was hurting laying on the floor. Joel’s eyes locked on Josh and punched him over and over again. Josh’s face was full of blood and he was begging for Joel to stop. 

“Don’t you ever touch her again! You lay a hand on her again, I’ll break your arm!” Joel lifted Josh by his collar and yelled at his face.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Josh begged Joel for his life.

“Now get the fuck out of this house and never show your face again!” Joel pointed his finger towards the door as he raised his voice again.

Joel closed the door after Josh crawled his way out of your house. You were in shock, crying, hyperventilating, shaking, and holding your ripped shirt to cover yourself. You had never seen Joel like this before. He was scary when he was angry just like what other people in the town talked about.  

“Hey, are you okay?” Joel’s voice was different from seconds ago.

He sounded very soft. He took off his jacket and put it on you. 

“I got you, babygirl. I got you.” He looked at you with worried eyes. (TLOU ep 8 reference 😘)

He wiped your tears with his thumb and hugged you. His hands rubbed your back in circles until your breathing was normal again. 

“Can you stand?” He asked you.

You nodded and guided him to your bedroom. He kept holding your arm, holding your weight as you walked. You opened your closet to get new clothes and changed into a new one. Joel faced the wall as you changed your clothes. He was always respectful to you. Not like the other guys you had met.

“Here.” You gave Joel his jacket back.

“Do you want me to stay?” He thought he would stay for the night to make sure you were safe.

“Will you?” You asked Joel with your puppy eyes as you sat on the bed.

“Of course, darlin’. I don’t want Josh to come here again and hurt you.” Joel walked to your bedroom door.

“Where are you going? I thought you’re staying.” You were confused.

“I am. I’m sleepin’ on the couch.” 

You chuckled. Everytime he did or said something, you fell in love with him more.

“Joel, stay here.” You pat the empty space beside you on your bed.

“No. I shouldn’t.” He still kept his chivalry.

“Joel, please. I don’t think I can sleep if you’re not next to me. I feel safe when I’m with you. Please.” You begged Joel.

“Okay.” Joel shyly moved his way to your bed and laid beside you.

You moved closer to him, put your head on his chest, and rested your hands on his stomach. You could hear his heart beating faster and his body was stiff because of your movements. Joel took a deep breath and put his arms around you. He rubbed your back in circles.

“I’m sorry. I know I don’t deserve you. But can I get that chance for our relationship? Give me a chance to be better for you?” He rested his chin on your head.

“You should stop being insecure, Joel. You’re the best man I’ve ever met. All the guys who flirted with me.. They weren't like you. I know for a fact they only want to get in my pants. But you’re different. Am I right?” You caressed his chest.

“No. You’re wrong.” You were shocked by his joke and raised your head to face him.

“I’m joking. Relax.” He laughed.

“Don’t ever do that again.” You put your head back to his chest and hit his chest.

“Oh! You’re bleeding! We need to get your fist cleaned up!” You took his hands worriedly.

“Don’t worry, darlin’. I’ve been worse.” Joel chuckled and kissed your forehead.

“Okay, then.” You kissed his bleeding fist that saved you from Josh. 

The two of you spent the night cuddling, talking and getting to know each other. Joel told you about his past, Sarah, and Ellie as you drift into your sleep. 

To be continued...

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

[farfromstrange]

Chaos Theory | Michael Kinsella x Reader

Chapter 5: Designed To Deceive

Masterlist ° Chapter List

Pairing: Michael Kinsella x Reader

Summary: Something isn't quite right with you and Michael starts growing suspicious. Meanwhile, you try to convince your boss to give him a job and Sarah to give him a chance. If it weren't for the worry about your sister and the strange customer who seems to look right through you, you would have almost considered the day a success. Almost.

Warnings: Some angst, mentions of death/grief, mentions of child abuse, sex jokes

A/n: Michael is a big teddy bear in the beginning, and then it gets a bit... messy. Everyone say: Fuck Amanda, Jimmy, and Frank!

Michael doesn’t know how to read you. Just last night, you were crying in his arms, but as soon as your alarm goes off, it’s as if nothing ever happened. You put on a smile, brew some coffee for the both of you and get ready for work. 

He’s not sure if it’s a good sign that you seem so positive, but he doubts that your behavior is healthy. You’re hiding, not just from him but from yourself. He knows what that’s like.

He catches you cursing at your phone after glancing at it all morning. And then, when you’re desperately searching for your workplace identification for the cash register on the small desk that you consider your office, and he offers to help you find it, your answer comes fast and almost in a state of panic. “No!” you say. You notice how harsh you sound, so you add a forced smile. “I mean, you don’t have to do that. I can find it on my own.”

You twist the small key that keeps the upper drawer locked and stuff it into your pocket before finding the card you’re searching for under a pile of literary agent listings you printed out a while back.

“Got it!” you declare. 

You sound so cheery, but Michael has a hard time believing that you’re okay, even though you assured him a million times after waking up. You took a pill of Ibuprofen to get rid of the headache, and then you were yourself again. Caring, kind, and overly optimistic. 

“Okay,” you grab your bag, “I’m going to talk to my boss because she’s set to come over and do her usual run-down today. But I don’t see why she shouldn’t hear you out.” 

He walks around the couch, smiling softly. “You know ya don’t have to do all that,” says Michael. “If it’s too much of a bother, I can find somethin’ else. I–”

You shush him with your index finger against his lips. His brown eyes widen slightly, and then he pouts. 

“You’re cute,” you say, smiling back at him. “But I promised I’d do everything in my power to get you that job. Just let me handle it, Mikey, okay?”

“I trust ya, but I’d understand if your attempts don’t work. That’s what I meant.”

“You underestimate my power of persuasion, Mister Kinsella.”

“I would never do tha’. I know yer persuasive.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Then just trust me on this,” you say. 

He nods slowly before pursing his lips and pressing a gentle kiss to your finger. You pull away and offer him your mouth instead, and he eagerly leans in to kiss you. You taste like mint toothpaste and cherry chapstick. Your perfume smells unique; it’s a scent he can’t explain because it’s one hundred percent you. And your skin, as so often, feels like silk under his fingers.  

“Have you ever filled out an application form before?” you ask him then.

“Yeah,” he answers. “One or two. My solicitor made me do it. I have a CV, but there’s nothin’ great on it.”

“Do you have it with you?”

“No, it’s–” Michael sighs. “It’s at my house.” 

He left so suddenly the day before, he didn’t think to take more than just a few clothes. He didn’t even bring toiletries, so he stole your shampoo and your toothpaste; you kept his toothbrush from your first night together, which still warms his heart when he thinks about how carefully you placed it out for him as if he already belongs there. 

You nod. “That’s no problem. If you don’t want to go back there, which I’d understand,” you say, “I can pick it up for you after work.”

“No,” he answers without missing a beat. 

If you go to his house, Birdy will surely see you from across the street, and if Birdy sees you, it won’t take long for Frank to find out. Jimmy and Amanda already know, the latter even saw you kissing, and they don’t approve. He understands, partly because you are so normal, you have no place in the life the Kinsellas are leading, but he’s looking for a proper job now and he knows he can protect you from the threats his family is facing and might as well knock on his door, too. What he doesn’t know is if he can protect you from is his own family. 

“Why?” You frown. 

He doesn’t even know where to start. 

“I’ll do it,” he says. “It’s not your responsibility.”

“Do you not want me in your home?”

“That’s not…” Michael can only shake his head. He wishes it were that easy. But it’s not just his family, it’s the memories the house holds, the bullet holes in the wall above the fireplace he has so often traced with his fingers ever since he first set foot back into it. 

It would be too much. You’d understand, you already do, but you are a very empathetic person and his four walls are dark. They hold darkness, the same one he harbors inside, and he doesn’t want you near that, not on your own, at least. It’s shame, it’s guilt and it’s a desperate need to protect you from his past. 

“I understand,” you say softly, cupping his cheek. “You’re scared that your family will see me, aren’t you?”

You catch on quickly. 

“Yeah,” he says, “among other things.”

“Okay, I won’t go there then. Do you still need me to take you?”

He smiles and shakes his head, kissing your forehead. “I’ll take the bus.”

“Call a taxi. Who knows what psychopath is walking these streets today. Don’t want you getting hurt.”

“Fine, taxi then.” 

“Thank you.”

His breath is hot against your forehead. You wrap your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest. He’s quick to hug you back. His hands travel all over your back; this is not him seeking comfort, this is all you. It’s another piece of evidence that you’re just pretending to be okay. Inside, you must be burning. But he doesn’t know how to help you.

“You worry too much,” he says. “I can take care of myself, ya know?”

“I know,” you answer. “I just can’t help it.”

He rubs your back until time tells you that you have to leave, and you reluctantly pull away from the hug. You glimpse down at your phone again, but something tells him you’re not checking the time. 

“Anyway, you call me if you need me to pick you up or drive you somewhere, yeah?” You look at him with eyes that leave no room for arguing. 

Michael nods, pulling you in for another gentle kiss. “Have fun at work,” he says. “Don’t let anyone drag ya down.”

“I’ll try,” you say, your smile almost reaching your eyes, but it doesn’t elicit the usual glow he could get lost in. You kiss him again as if to deflect from his concern. “Bye. And don’t forget to close the door when you leave!”

“Will do.”

The door falls shut behind you, and his eyes instantly flick to the drawer you locked. You probably think he didn’t see you, but he’s always vigilant, even more so after the day before. Why you locked that drawer, he doesn’t know. The Kinsella in him tells him to check in case there is danger lurking inside, but you’re not like that, you can’t be. You’re keeping something else from him, and you took the key with you to make sure he wouldn’t disturb it. 

He can’t break your trust like that, even though staring at it and not knowing what could be so important to lock it away bugs him to the point he’s ruffling his hair. 

What are you hiding from him?

And suddenly, he’s not the only one with secrets anymore; it’s the both of you. 

•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•

The truth is, you’re not okay. The few hours you slept weren’t restful. You dreamt about the darkness inside of you in many shapes, not able to wake up from the nightmare, and it dulled your spirit when you woke up. 

But Michael doesn’t need to know that you’re struggling. You cried your heart out to him and he held you, and you don’t want him to be any more worried than he already is. He has enough on his plate with Anna and his family. You don’t want to be a bother to him. 

The thoughts are harmful and your common sense belittles you for being so stupid and not just talking about what’s bothering you, but it’s not your common sense that is in control over you. It’s a trauma response, your therapist once said, trying to take care of everyone and fix them, put on a mask and pretend you’re okay because that’s what you have been doing from the start to protect your fragile heart. You internalized that behavior and now you can’t put it down. 

It’s been a while since you have been to therapy. You went the first year after moving, but that was it. You changed your attitude and decided to live in your bubble, and it worked for the most part. Until Michael came around. 

You don’t blame him. He’s not the one ruining your life. Meeting him was an unrelated event, but it caused your life to spiral out of control and fall victim to chaos. He’s the butterfly that flapped his wings and caused a series of totally unrelated events to tear you down, and he is not to blame for that. 

If you wanted someone to blame, all you had to do was look no further than the rearview mirror and into your own eyes. 

Maya hasn’t texted or called ever since you talked over the phone. You transferred her the money for the field trip and a little more, hoping it would be enough for her to get away for a few days. The chat between you has been silent since. 

She said that he took her phone, which means every call and every text goes through him. She snuck out to call you the day before, but you know she is smart enough to erase any trace of you. She hasn’t even saved your number under your name. In her phone, you’re called Sierra and you’re one of her high school friends. It made conversation between you so much easier after you moved, but then you fell into the rabbit hole and you drove apart. 

After something traumatic happens and you decide to leave the past behind, there comes a time when you don’t want to be confronted with reality anymore and you decide to shut everyone out. It’s better to avoid the truth than let it ruin your new life. It’s human nature, and you went through the same process. 

There are five stages of grief, and denial was by far the stage at which you stayed the longest, and you still are inevitably stuck there. Of course, you went through all five stages, but then you returned to the first one and you haven’t recovered since. Denial is nice to live in when you make yourself believe that the past can’t haunt you if you simply push it away. But it’s a lie that depression and trauma tell you; these voices are not to be trusted. 

Maya is all you have left, you realize that now. Your anxiety is higher than ever, and you find yourself glancing at your phone even as you’re driving. Car accidents can be deadly. They kill people. One second is all it takes. Humans are breakable, and cars are not built to save someone. If anything, they can turn into deadly weapons. You should know better than to switch your concentration from the road to the phone that is lying on the passenger seat. But this is your sister, and you need her to be safe. 

You fix your makeup before stepping into the café. If you put on a smile, no one will ask you if you’re okay. They will see your smile and move on with their lives. If you’re nice enough, they will leave you alone. You can’t let anyone get to you today or you might not make it ten minutes without crying. 

Your boss greets you. She is in a much better mood than the last time you saw her. She’s in charge of many cafés all over the country, all part of the small ‘Butterfly Effect’ franchise she created for herself. She does regular check-ins with you because she’s from Dublin, but she does drive to different towns in Ireland to check those stores, too. She’s strict, but she’s a woman with a good heart and that’s all that matters to you. 

“Ma’am,” you find the courage to ask her, “Could we talk for a second?”

You reached the café a bit earlier, giving you enough time to have a proper conversation with her before your shift. Sarah is already behind the counter, so you can use the moment of privacy to mention Michael without her catching wind of it before you can tell her personally. She is not going to be thrilled, you can guarantee that. 

Your boss tells you time and time again that you can address her as Ava, but you don’t feel comfortable treating her like a friend when she’s the one responsible for your job. Apparently, in the American coffee shops she used to work at, everyone acted like they were close friends, the lines between customer and service provider blurring. That’s not the kind of atmosphere you are used to from your previous jobs. 

“Of course,” she says and follows you into the backroom. “What can I help you with? I hope it’s not about how I yelled at you the other day. If so, I apologize. I had a rough day.”

“No, no, it’s not about that,” you assure her. “I had a rough day too, believe me. I get it. I actually need to ask you something. Two things. One’s a favor and the other… the other is very important to me.” You fidget with your hands. 

“What, you need some time off?”

“No, I– Okay, this might sound very weird, but I need you to give me more work.”

Ava frowns. “You want to do overtime?”

“If it’s possible, I’d be okay with working a seven-day week without a day off,” you say. 

“You know that means you’re going to overwork yourself, right?”

“I won’t overwork myself.”

“There is a reason you get a day or two off every week. If I make you work any more hours, I’ll risk a lawsuit.”

“But I need the money, ma’am. I really, really do.”

“Money? Sweetheart, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” you lie. 

You’re not begging for overtime because of yourself. Giving Maya most of the money you saved is one thing, but your bank account is nearly empty and you might not be able to make rent on time if you work at the pace you’re going now. And if your sister ever needs something else, or you end up having to fly her out of the country and to you, you need more money. 

This is not about you, this is about family. 

“Are you sure?” Ava asks. “A seven-day week is not something I can legally make happen for you, and you know that.”

“Then make me work more during the days I’m already on the job,” your breath hitches as the words come out high-pitched. You don’t like to whine, but you need her to listen to you. 

She contemplates, her chest heaving with a sigh. “I can add a few more hours to the schedule,” she caves, “but I’m not going to let you work double shifts.”

“Thank you!” You want to hug her, but that would be inappropriate.

She smiles. “You’re welcome. But if there’s anything you need–”

“There’s one more thing,” you say. 

“And what’s that? Please don’t tell me you want me to strike your vacation time, too.”

“No, it’s not about my holidays. I have a possible candidate that would love to work for us.”

“Oh?” Her eyes light up. Being understaffed is a pain not only for the staff but also for the ones responsible. You have been lacking applicants, and Ava is barely holding up the workload. “Tell me more,” she says. 

“Well, he doesn’t have any experience,” you begin, “but he is willing to learn. He’s calm, compassionate, and patient. And he’s in desperate need of a job.”

“Part-time or full-time?”

“I figure part-time.”

“Why?”

You grind your teeth. “What if I told you he needs it to regain visitation rights for his daughter? But he’s very passionate about taking it seriously,” you quickly add, knowing the initial answer sounded like it was the only reason he wanted to work there. “I can assure you that,” you say. 

Her eyebrows shoot up to her hairline. “Visitation rights? What did he do to lose them?” she asks. 

“He, uh… went to prison for eight years.”

“Pri–” She crosses her arms. “Seriously?”

“Yeah, but that’s why he needs a job. He wants to be better.”

“Eight years is a lot. Why… what did he do?”

“I can’t tell you that. It’s not my place.”

Ava says your name in a rather condescending way. 

You sigh. “He was convicted for playing a huge part in the wrongful death of his wife, but he is a good guy, I–”

“No,” her answer comes short, but it feels like her voice echoes in your ears. 

“But you hired Oliver,” you argue. 

You promised Michael she would give him a chance, and you won’t let her judge him without having ever met him. 

“I have a serious business here and I don’t let just any convict in,” Ava responds. “This is nothing personal, but–”

“No, he deserves a second chance!” You stand your ground. For Michael. For Anna. For all of you. “Please, you haven’t met him.”

She purses her lips. “Are you involved with him?”

“I know him,” you go around the question, “and he is willing to change.”

The silence that follows is deafening. She thinks about your words, the wheels in her head turning rather obviously. You don’t know how long she’s quiet, but it can’t be a good sign. 

She lets out a prolonged exhale, her eyes switching to the watch on her wrist. “Wednesday, eight o’clock,” she says then. “I want to see him and his application in person.”

“Wait,” you stammer. 

“What?”

“So that’s a yes?”

“Yeah, I’ll hear him out,” – relief washes over you – “But that doesn’t mean I’ll hire him. That’s a decision I’ll make after I meet with him.”

Your face breaks out into a bright smile, and this time, it is real. There is still good left in some people, and Ava proved it to you again. 

“Thank you so much,” you say, your voice a grateful whisper. “You won’t regret it.”

“I better not,” she says. With another look at her watch, she pushes herself off the counter she was leaning against. “I have to take a look at the books now, and your shift is about to start, so I suggest you do that.”

“Copy that, ma’am.”

“Oh, and–” She turns around halfway through the doorway, “Tell your boyfriend that he needs to really impress me.”

She saw right through you, but in that case, you don’t care. You nod, overjoyed with the feeling of relief and the fact that Michael might get a chance to work someplace that is far away from his family. And knowing your boss, she would even write a letter to the judge to prove to them that the ‘Butterfly Effect’ is a good place to work for someone in need of redemption. But you will get to that once she made her decision. 

You pull out your phone. Still no messages from Maya. If the radio silence keeps persisting, you might as well call her and hang up if one of your parents decides to pick up, but then at least you’ll know her phone isn’t in a ditch somewhere – and you just need to know if she’s doing okay. 

You tear your eyes away from the chat with your sister and switch to another number. 

‘Wednesday, 8 o’clock. My boss will hear u out. We just need to work on ur documents xo’

You send the text to Michael before storing your phone in your backpocket. Perhaps some good might come out of this day. 

Sarah smiles at you when you join her behind the counter. “What did ya and Ava talk about?” she asks. 

You smile, the expression a little strained. “I will tell you later, this is no conversation for here,” you say. 

If she reacts even remotely the way she did after she saw you kissing Michael, you need to be someplace that doesn’t have mugs or sharp weapons she could throw at you. You don’t even want to imagine her reaction, and you’re a little scared, but she deserves to know the truth before anyone else does. 

“You’re my friend, right?”

“Of course,” Sarah says. 

“Okay, good.”

“Why?”

“Just asking,” you say. 

“Okay…” But her eyes hold some suspicion as she turns away to finish drying the dishes. 

The next few hours pass by without mishaps. Your mind often slips to your sister and Michael, and you catch yourself checking your phone more often than usual, but at least with work, nothing goes wrong. You forget the whirlwind of emotions inside of you for a moment, focusing on her friend and whatever wild dating story she can come up with, and you actually find yourself laughing again. 

You turn to face forward when the bell dings. There is no line right now, so he walks right up to you. His hair is graying and he’s wearing glasses. The suit tells you he must have an important job. Your lack of sleep makes it harder to judge the kind of person he is, but you get a shady vibe from him. You’re not sure how you know, but something about him seems not right.

He stands before you for a moment, eyeing you and not the menu. Sarah catches sight of that too, her eyebrows furrowing slightly as she refills the toppings that have gone out.

You wait for him to speak, but he’s entirely focused on you. “Welcome to the Butterfly Effect,” you speak up, putting on a smile. “What can I do for you today?”  

He’s really strange, you think. Only after glancing at the menu, he smiles back. “I’ll have a tall Irish Coffee to go and one of those cinnamon biscuits ya’ve got in the display,” he says. 

You nod, typing his order into the register. “Your name, sir?” you ask.

He smirks. “Frank.”

“Okay.” You write his name on the paper cup. “Anything else I can help you with?”

“Actually,” his eyes flick to Sarah who has started brewing the espresso for his drink, “Would you mind makin’ the coffee fer me?” 

Your blood runs cold when he says your name, but then you remember it is written on your name tag and you calm down. 

You look at your friend, then back at the man. He’s not flirting or he would go about this differently. 

“Um, I mean, sure?” 

Sarah shrugs and hands you the cup back. 

“Is that all?” you ask.

He nods. “Thanks, love.”

You don’t like that he calls you that. With Michael, it’s different. Now you’re just creeped out. 

You take his money and turn to quickly finish his Irish Coffee. His eyes are on you the entire time, and you feel slightly violated. You’re used to being watched by customers, but there is something dark in his eyes. He’s like shadows in a dark alleyway that you walk around because you’re scared of what might be hiding in the darkness.

“Irish Coffee for Frank,” you say, trying not to let the uneasiness show. 

He smiles when you hand him the cup. Opening the lid, he takes a good whiff of the liquid inside. He hums.

“I’m sure ya make an excellent Irish Coffee,” he says. “Fer a Brit, I mean.”

“Thanks.” You’re not sure how to respond, you just want him gone.

Don’t let anyone drag ya down, Michael’s voice sounds in your head. 

You straighten your shoulders and smile a little wider. “You live and you learn, right?” you say. 

He nods. “That’s true.”

“Well, if that’s all–“

“Do ya always write notes on yer customers’ cups?” 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

The question catches you by surprise. You blink wildly, trying to find a reason as to why he would ask that. Goosebumps form on your skin. You don’t like the look he has in his eyes, and you can’t even describe it.

“It’s just a question,” he says. 

You swallow. “Sometimes, I do. Why? Is there something wrong, sir?” 

“Oh, no reason. I was just askin’.” He grips his biscuit and his coffee tighter. “Take care of yerself,” he tells you, “Ya never know what might happen out there, right?”  

He heads back out the door before you can find a way to answer him. 

Sarah appears beside you, watching the stranger disappear down the street. “Was that a threat?” she asks.

You flinch a little at the sound of her voice so close to your ear. “I don’t know,” you admit. 

“Sounded like one.”

“That guy was creepy.”

“Yeah, he is. I was about to give that bastard a piece of my mind.”

“That’s not always the answer,” you say. 

But in this case, you wish Sarah would have unleashed her anger before he could have freaked you out further.

His words did sound like a threat, but what bothers you most is the look in his eyes when he eyed you top to bottom, and his knowing smirk when he left.

You’ve never met this guy but he acted as if he knew you, and that’s a feeling that drives the stake of fear deeper into your heart. 

“So anyway,” Sarah leans back against the counter, “Ya wanted to tell me somethin’?”

The café is quiet. Most of the customers have cleared out. You look around, a little on edge still, then turn back to her. “Yeah, there is something you need to know,” you say. You place the towel in your hand down, absentmindedly wiping the non-existent stains off the surface. 

“What?” she asks. 

Taking a deep breath, you gather your thoughts before speaking. "I've been trying to get Michael a job here." The second the words leave your mouth, you brace yourself for her reaction. 

Sarah's jaw drops. “Are you fuckin' kidding me?!”

“No, I’m serious, but hear me out–”

“No, nope, nu-uh.”

“Sarah–”

“Fuckin’ Michael?” She growls your name through gritted teeth. “The wife-murderer who just happens to be your boyfriend now? Which, by the way, I still haven’t fully wrapped my head around. I have been trying to understand, but now ya want this… this criminal to work here? With us? Are you out of your goddamn mind?”

You lift your hand, trying to calm her down. You expected as much when you asked Ava to give him a chance. Sarah is your closest friend and she cares with a passion that can often turn into rage. You love her, but you also care about Michael and her rage makes you angry, too. She makes it hard not to lose your mind. 

“Seriously,” she says, “Did someone shit in your brain or somethin’? I don’t get it!”

You take a step back, a mixture of hurt and frustration etched across your face. Her words sting. You never thought it would be easy to convince her, but you hoped she would at least try to understand. You hoped she would think about you giving Michael a chance after finding out about you and that it would be easier for her to accept him now. But she’s not even trying, it seems, no matter how many times she tells you she is. 

"Sarah, I know it's hard to grasp, and I'm not asking you to accept everything all at once," you say. "I know it sounds like he's the worst man alive, but that's not true. He's a human being who made mistakes. I'm trying to get you to see that he's a good guy. He'll show you that if he gets the job, I promise. Michael has paid his dues, and he's trying to make amends for his past. He lost what he loved; he lost his wife and he's trying to get his daughter back now. He's genuinely remorseful. I see him try to be better every day."

“Why do you always have to be so goddamn good-hearted? Do you understand that all this trying to fix him could actually backfire?”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Not do it?”

“Well, I like him!”

“Don’t like him then.”

“I can’t!”

“What, yer gonna tell me next that yer in love with him?”

“I–” You pause. Your eyes flick to the ground. 

“Oh no,” Sarah whispers. “Don’t tell me I hit the nail on its fuckin’ head.”

“You didn’t!” You’re not sure why you paused or why you sound so defensive now. “I… I don’t know what I feel for him.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

The confusion is the worst part about feeling like this, whatever it is. “I’m not lying,” you insist. “It’s not just me being kindhearted. I genuinely like him.” That much, you know. 

She crosses her arms and glares at you. "I don't care if he's sorry or not. People like him don't change overnight, if at all. How can ya trust him? How can you trust your judgment?"

“I just can, okay?” you sound exasperated. “Don’t ask me how, I just know.”

"Yer risking everything for him, aren't ya? Your friendship, your safety, and now even your own emotions. This isn't like you. You've always been cautious and level-headed."

You clench your fist. Her skepticism hits deep, causing a flicker of doubt to cross your mind. But Michael makes you feel alive and understood; he was the first man to see you, and you can’t deny that you need someone like him. You need him. 

You know the connection between you and Michael defies your principles and logic and it isn’t like you, Sarah is right, but people change. You’ve changed. 

“I understand your concerns, Sarah. I do. But love and relationships aren't always simple. Sometimes they defy logic and reasoning,” you explain. “I never planned for any of this to happen, but it did. And I can't just turn off my feelings for him. It's not that easy.”

Sarah's gaze softens, and she takes a step closer to you. “I know ya can't control your emotions,” she says, “but ya can control your actions.”

“You told me I should run at the slightest whiff of danger, and I promise that I will, but there is no danger–” Lie. “It’s just him needing a helping hand, and I really, really like this guy, Sarah. So please, if he ever starts working here, can you at least try to get along instead of wishing death and destruction upon his head? He has been through enough, and once you meet him, you will understand what I’m talking about when I say that he’s actually a good guy.”

You’re persuasive. You have a way with words that leaves many people breathless, and you seem to tickle something in your friend’s mind. 

Sarah's eyes search yours. She takes a deep breath and nods slowly, her initial anger dissipating. "Fine," she says with a hint of reluctance. "I'll try to give him a chance. But only because it's you."

You grasp her hand, sighing a breath of relief. “Thank you,” you say. 

“Just promise me one thing,” she tightens her grip, “Promise me again that if anything feels off, you'll trust your instincts and prioritize your own safety.”

“I promise.”

“Good. I mean it. I care about ya, and I don't want to see ya hurt. Just be careful, okay?”

“Yeah, I will.”

She nods. “My door is always open,” she adds. “Don’t hesitate to come to me. I’m here for you. And if he breaks your heart–” Sarah lets go of your hand and grabs one of the bananas from the display, followed by a knife. 

Your eyes widen when she takes the knife, beheading the banana in an instant. She grins. You don’t find it particularly funny because she just threatened to take away one of his best assets, but her protectiveness warms your heart nonetheless. 

“Can you leave that part of him out of it?” you ask. 

She takes what’s left of the fruit and bites into it. “Why?”

“Well…”

“How good can it be?”

You purse your lips, looking away from her. 

“How good?” she questions again. 

The taste of your leftover caramel Frappuccino explodes on your tongue. You smirk around the straw. 

“Yer blushin’. Why are you blushin’?” 

The air in the cup makes a loud gurgling sound as you suck it out through the straw. 

“Can I get some details?” Sarah continues poking you. 

“Why?” you ask innocently. “There’s nothing to tell.”

“Yer lying.”

“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not.”

“The way yer sucking that straw tells me that you are,” she retorts. 

“I haven’t done that yet,” you clarify, but then your smirk grows and you turn around. “He did though.” And with a happy giggle, you skip over to the garbage can and toss your now-empty cup inside. 

“Wait, so Mister I-Went-To-Prison-For-Eight-Years-Fer-Murder gives you head?”

You nod. “Mhm.”

“Good head?”

“Fantastically good head,” you say. “And he loves it.”

Sarah lowers her banana. “Damn!”

“And that banana,” you say, “Doesn’t even come close.”

“What?”

She can hear you laugh to yourself as you move on to the seating area to clean the empty tables. With one last look at the half-eaten banana, she decides the picture in her head is not worth it and she throws it into the trash. 

She calls your name. You turn around. “Ya best believe yer gonna get more questions from me,” she says. 

You wink. “Oh, I’m counting on it.”

Amidst the sex jokes, you can’t help but hope that, in practice, Sarah can put her differences aside just as easily as in theory and give Michael a chance. Because he deserves more than one person that believes in him. And if he sees that someone else accepts him and cares enough to give him a second chance, he might not feel so useless anymore. 

But that is all you can do–hope for the best. 

Tagging: @bellaxgiornata @shouldbestudying41 @your-not-invisible-to-me @glowstick-lesbian @ms-murdockswift @acharliecoxedfan @loveroftoomanyfandoms @mattmurdocksscars @roseallisonparker @1988-fiend @norestfortheshelbywicked

[americas1suiteheart]

Just a little somethin' I thought up of as these past days going to school has become already gradually harder and it doesn't help that I'm a little ill. Enjoy🤭

Let Me Pamper You

[Lemon (Bullet Train x GN! Reader]

[Summary; After a particularly hard day at work, you return home exhausted. So Lemon being the best husband ever, pampers you for the night.]

[Notes; There are some mentions of taking over the counter drugs for being ill, so if that bothers you I recommend staying away]

[Warnings; None really, this is just pure fluff]

You sigh in frustration as you struggle to untie your shoelace, then finally succeed and take your shoe off, placing it next to the other pairs on the rug next to the door.

You had a particularly hard day at work, and it didn't help that you were a little under the weather as well.

"Y/n, is that you?" You hear your husband call out from the guest room.

"Yeah, I'll be there in jus' a second," You call back to him.

You'd been married to your husband, Lemon, for a few years now.

You knew him during Sixth Form before he had gotten the job he had now. And of course he was much different before. His work was bound to change him regardless, but he was still the same childish guy he's always been no matter what. And you loved him for it.

Once you finally got everything situated, you made your way to find Lemon happily playing with his train model set that took over most of the room.

You stand at the doorway and smile as he continues to put trees and miniature people around the set.

"Y/n, sweetheart, how was work?" Lemon says as he looks up and notices you standing at the doorway.

Suddenly you were brought back to the same terrible mood you were in before.

"I don't wanna particularly talk about it, love. Can't say I had a great day, especially with this bloody cold I've got," You sigh tiredly.

"Mmm, I'm sorry, love. How about I fix you a bath and such. You can relax the rest of the night," Lemon says, putting what he was doing aside to guide you to your guys' shared room.

"You don't have to do that Lem, really I can do it myself. Please get back to what you were doing." You insist, but Lemon keeps walking you to the room, finally sitting you down on the bed.

"You're right, I don't have to, but I want to. So relax and undress while I get that bath running for you and then I'll fix you up a cup of tea and get you your medicine okay? Let me pamper you for the night," Lemon says, walking to the restroom to set up the bath.

You sigh happily to yourself, you had the absolute best husband you could ask for.

Yes, there were some things that weren't so great like when he would leave for days on some missions, coming back with some injuries you needed to tend to. But you didn't bug him about it ever because you knew he was smart enough about things and knew what he was doing.

You undress, throwing your clothes inside of your hamper, walking into the restroom where Lemon was.

"You look gorgeous my love, what kind of tea do you want?" Lemon says, placing a soft kiss to your temple.

"Do we still have that lemon ginger tea? If so can you make me that with some honey?" You ask, submerging your body into the warm, bubbly water.

"Of course, love," Lemon says, walking to the kitchen.

You relax for a few minutes, letting the hot vapors clear your sinuses, and allowing your muscles to relax fully.

Lemon comes in with two teacups and a teapot on a tray, setting it on the flat part of the bath. (What the fuck is it called? You all know what I'm talkin' about, right?)

He leaves the restroom once more, returning faster than the last, this time with cold medicine and acetaminophen.

You groan, recalling the terrible taste of the medicine from the last time you were sick.

"I know it's gross but you have to take it," Lemon urges, pouring it out onto a spoon.

You groan once more, turning your face away like a child.

"The quicker you get better the quicker I can kiss you on your lips without getting sick," Lemon cheekily smirks.

You quickly take the medicine, scrunching your nose up at the foul taste it left in your mouth and throat.

He hands you the acetaminophen and pours you a cup of the tea, you pop the two pills into your mouth and take a gulp of the tea, slightly burning your mouth.

"God that was awful," You groan, submerging yourself back into the tub.

"I thought I brewed that tea perfectly and put the right amount of honey in it," Lemon says, fake hurt in his voice.

"I obviously meant the medicine, love. The tea was wonderful," You giggle.

"Good to know. Let's wash you up now," Lemon chuckles.

He grabs the shampoo as he motions for you to wet your hair. You comply, putting your hair in the warm water, letting it sit in there for a couple seconds to let it properly get wet.

You then pull your head out, looking at Lemon as he squirts some of the shampoo into his hands, putting it onto your hair and gently massaging it in, making sure to get every strand and part of your scalp washed.

Once he finishes, he grabs the bucket next to the bath and fills it with warm water, you put your head back slightly and he pours it over your soapy hair, ridding of all of the soap on your head.

You felt so loved in that moment. He'd put everything aside just for you, just so he could take care of you like this. You couldn't be more happy than you were now in that moment.

Lemon grabs the body soap and your body sponge, putting some of the soap onto the sponge and rubbing it in. He starts washing your body, starting from the top to the bottom. You took a momet to look at him, noticing how his sleeves were rolled up and how he had a little bit of the bubbles on his arms and hands from washing you.

"Alright, do you wanna stay in here a little longer? Maybe I could read that chapter of your book for you?" Lemon asks, finishing up and putting your sponge back in its respected spot.

"That would be amazing, Lem." You say, smiling sweetly at him.

Lemon nods with a grin and goes into your room, returning with your book and his reading glasses on his face as he sits down on the stool.

You relax once more and close your eyes as you listen to him reading the chapter of your book out loud to you, his voice soft and not too loud.

You were so relaxed you could fall asleep right there in the bathtub. You were content and happy. Happy that you had such an amazing husband. You can say it to yourself a million times and it will still baffle you that you were married to the best person ever.

He finishes and you drain your bath, carefully walking out as Lemon wraps you in a warm fluffy towel, drying you off and walking you back into the room.

You sit down on the bed, watching as he pulls out your undergarments and comfortable pajamas from your dresser.

"Will these work for you darling? I tried to get something warm so you don't get any sicker during the night," Lemon says, holding the garments out to you.

"Those are perfect, Lemon. Thank you,"

"Okay, you can put those on and I'll go wash the cups and teapot, I'll be right back my love," Lemon hands you the pajamas and leaves with the tray in his hands.

You dress and dry your hair as much as you could with the towel, then slipping into the covers comfortably.

Lemon returns, changing into his own sleep clothes and turning off the remaining lights, slipping into bed next to you.

"Thank you, Lem." You say, cuddling into his chest as he rubs your back.

"Of course my love." He replies, placing a kiss to your hair.

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

[This one took me a little longer to finish up, and I kinda just wanted something short to post but that clearly didn't happen. It took me so long to finish that I now am no longer sick the moment I've posted it. But I do hope you guys enjoyed it. I do notice I've been doing nothing but Lemon fics so far, and I promise I'll finish those requests up hopefully soon, so please just bear with me as I'm really busy. I hope you guys have a great day or night, auf wiedersehen!

[a-writer-on-elm-street]

I Missed You

Pairing: Eddie x Fem!Reader

Summary: After everything that went down in the Upside Down, Eddie has been laying low somewhere and you haven't seen him in months. And all you want is to be with him again.

A/N: So after writing that incredibly depressing three parter a few days ago, I just had to write something happier. Hope you like it!

You entered your trailer for what felt like the thousandth time since getting out of the Upside Down, and nothing had changed. You were alone, as always. Eddie was god know's where and he had been for months now. But you couldn't blame him for that. He had to lay low for a while which meant keeping as far away from Hawkins as possible, far away from you.

The only reason you were able to endure the pain of coming home to an empty bed was because at least this way, you knew Eddie was still a free man. He was alive and not in prison, and that was all that mattered. But that didn't mean it didn't hurt. That you didn't get lonely.

The first time you spoke to Eddie, the only relationship that existed between you was dealer and customer. You'd always had a pretty sheltered life despite your mom being passed out on the couch almost every day, so you'd never really been too rebellious. So one day, after you finally kicked your mom out, you decided you wanted to try weed for the first time. And you just happened to know of someone a few trailers down who sold it. So you walked over to Eddie's with the cash your mom had left stashed away in the trailer.

You still remember the way he looked at you when he found you standing on his doorstep. It was like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. And then you asked him for some weed, which left him even more stunned.

He awkwardly stood aside so you could come in and it was clear he was still trying to get his head around the fact that you were at his trailer, looking to buy drugs.

And ever since that night, you kinda became weed buddies. You'd go over to his, you'd get high together, and then you'd go home. Until one day, you just stopped going home.

You didn't quite know how it happened but soon enough, you were staying over at each other's trailers pretty much all the time.

Now, you were back in your own trailer, climbing into an empty bed. At least you still had your weed, you thought to yourself.

Sighing, you sat up, digging around in your bedside table for an already rolled joint. You didn't take long lighting it up and taking a long drag, choking a little as you did.

"Might wanna be careful there."

You didn't even bother to look up. You'd probably just finally lost your mind. You'd only be setting yourself up for disappointment if you looked up at that doorway.

But it kept going. "Hey. Hello?"

You finally decided to look up and your heart dropped when you saw him.

"You're here." You breathed out, dropping your joint into the ashtray. "How?"

He grinned. "Well I think I'm officially dead now...so I called our good pal Steve and he picked me up."

"You might wanna rephrase that last part." You joked, unable to control the stupid grin that spread across your face.

"Shit, I missed you!" He beamed, suddenly charging at you, almost knocking you outside when he practically threw himself at you.

He landed right on top of you, almost crushing you beneath him, before propping himself up on his elbows, a big dumb smile on his face. "I can't believe you're here." You smiled, tangling your fingers in his hair.

"Wanna see somethin'?" He suddenly said, quickly pushing himself up onto his knees in front of you.

"What?"

"Look at this." He grinned excitedly, lifting his shirt up to reveal the scarring along his sides. "Very metal, right?"

You laughed. "I've never known someone to get excited about goddamn scars."

"So what'd you think?"

"Very metal." You agreed, nodding your head.

"Right?"

"God, I missed you so much." You felt yourself tearing up suddenly. Having him here, in front of you, that dopey smile on his face as he showed you his scars he thought were so cool, it was the happiest you'd felt since he left.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked, his voice turning softer as he pressed a hand to your cheek.

You shook your head. "Nothing, I just missed you."

"Missed you too." He said, pulling you into a hug.

You stayed like that for a few moments until Eddie spoke again. "You wouldn't happen to have another joint would you?"

You laughed. "I have plenty."

"Cool. That's cool."

[Main Masterlist] [Eddie Masterlist]