#thanks to replaying this saga

[formalmess]

🍥?

🍥 what's your favorite fic you've written? (from fic writer asks)

oh, certainly tangled thicket! before i even started conceptualizing it, i always thought of it as a passion project: the ol 'write what you want to read' mantra, y'know?

from a practical sense, in the past, i usually felt pressured to follow whatever current trends or fics i was writing that were getting the most attention, but in the end found myself overall unhappy with the work i was producing. with lmtt, i took my time in crafting the narrative from start to finish, and then went about at the speed i wanted when writing it.

from a creative standpoint, it just hits a lot of the points i really love! it has luigi's mansion as the focal background, and the beanbean kingdom as its setting—so i could do a lot geographically and culturally—and play around with underrated characters from superstar saga. and of course, writing peasley and luigi's adorably charming dynamic certainly incentivized me.

further, i love revenge plots, fun parallels to mess with (the day i thought of the toxic hellen/boo to the healthy luigi/peasley... art), and lots more! it also includes a lot of tropes i love, with all the drama and tension being derived from probable danger and angst... gotta love it.

i think i will always consider it my favorite project. and it is certainly my longest... and the longest in the luisley tag i think! cool little achievement. c:

[pascaloverx]

Moonlight

Summary: You and Edward Cullen used to have a romantic relationship. But fate seemed not to believe in the possibility of a vampire and a potential she-wolf being together. Years after your separation, you return to Forks. Edward is committed to Bella Swan, and Jacob Black has his own pack. What happens when, upon your return, you begin to transform into a she-wolf and both Edward and Jacob seem eager to revisit the past with you?

Author's Note: The characters in this fanfic do not belong to me but to Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight universe. The story blends events that happened in the Twilight saga movies with invented ones. Enjoy reading. This story will contain inappropriate language, a possible love triangle, scenes of violence, and romance.

TWO FOUR

THREE

The guilt of kissing Edward was eating away at you inside. You didn't know if you were feeling worse because of the kiss or because you enjoyed kissing him so much. The worst part was that you were starting to want to kiss him again. But that couldn't happen again. Not while he's dating someone else and you're staying at the house of his biggest enemy.

"You know your thoughts almost scream because they're so loud, right?" Billy Black comments as he walks through the door of his room. Well, his guest room. You realize you've been sitting on the bed, replaying every moment from last night. What could you have done to avoid feeling so burdened with guilt?

"Mr. Black, may I ask you a question?" You inquire as you snap back to reality. Billy Black was your father's best friend, which is why you grew up close to Jacob.

"No need for all that formality, Y/N. But go ahead and ask your question." Mr. Black enters the room, wheeling his wheelchair close to where you're sitting. You look at him, feeling a bit embarrassed about asking such a question.

"If you had made a mistake and your mind was punishing you with the heaviest burden of guilt, what would you do?" You ask, sounding quite dramatic, which makes him chuckle a bit.

"There are two ways to relieve the burden of guilt. The first, more complicated and less chosen: be honest and admit the mistake to everyone it may affect. Or you can take the other way: experience the guilt and let it go. Your father used to tell me that some mistakes are meant to live only in the deepest corners of our being. I hope I've helped." Mr. Black speaks calmly, as you find yourself thinking that perhaps this is a mistake you'd like to keep hidden in some corner of your being.

"You did help. I think I need to get some fresh air. If Jacob asks for me, tell him I'll be at the cliff." You say as you get up from the bed, and Mr. Black nods understandingly, acknowledging that you needed that time. The cliff was the place where all of you used to meet when you were younger. Jumping off it was your big adventure together. When you reach the top of the cliff, you feel the wind hitting your face strongly. It's liberating. You close your eyes, and for a moment, you feel nothing at all.

"Do you remember the last time we were here?" Edward appears behind you. You really didn't miss those surprise appearances of his.

"I remember a situation like this before. You showing up out of the blue and me trying to figure out what I've done to deserve the honor of having my private time invaded by Edward Cullen. But tell me, what do you want?" You speak almost harshly, clearly on the defensive, fearing a difficult conversation with Cullen. You don't even turn to look at Edward.

"If only back then I had left you alone. Maybe we wouldn't have broken up, and now we might be experiencing a different reality." Edward speaks as he approaches, and you can feel his presence getting closer to you.

"Stop with this talk. After what we did, reminiscing about the past is the last thing we should be doing. You should thank me for breaking up with you. You're in love with someone else. And you shouldn't even be here. There's more than one pack of wolves who jump off this cliff ready to take out any vampire." Looking into Edward's eyes as you say this makes everything more personal. Unfortunately, you can't help but worry about Cullen. Unfortunately, the kiss you shared proves that there are feelings between you.

"I want to talk about the kiss. You basically locked yourself in the Black house. I had to come here." Edward speaks as he approaches you, and you take a step back. Too much proximity might lead to repeating the mistake.

"I'll make it easy for you. The kiss meant nothing. We were foolish and let ourselves get carried away by silly sentimentality. We're not meant for each other. You're literally living your happily ever after. Overthinking that damn kiss will only hurt us. And hurt those around us." You say, feeling tears welling up in your eyes. Damn it, this conversation has barely begun and you already feel deeply affected by lying to Edward, especially because it's not true.

"It would be easier for me to move on if you told me why you broke up with me. Why you want to bury your feelings for me so deep in your heart that I hardly recognize the woman I fell in love with," Edward says, somewhat angrily, moving closer to you.

"My father found out about us the day before I broke up with you. I wanted to tell you, but he said he would kill every member of your family, that a war between the Cullens and the Quileutes would be on my hands. I feared for us. And for my tribe." As you explain to Edward something that remained unresolved between you, you feel like you're reopening a very painful wound by reliving the past.

"And you chose to be a coward and abandon me. Seems fair, a war doesn't seem fair when you can just end everything with the person you say you love and walk away," Edward responds, clearly hurt. As if he could judge you.

"First, I will not accept being called a coward for doing the right thing. Sure, I could have told you the truth years ago, but lying was the safest way to prevent you from doing something reckless. And I didn't just say I loved you, I actually loved you. I loved you so much that I can't let anyone find out we were together because any member of Sam's or Jacob's pack might believe you killed my parents. And I've done a very good job defending that none of you, Cullens, would ever do something like that." The words come out of your mouth more harshly than you intended. Edward looks perplexed, perhaps never realizing that if they found out about us, they would think he killed my parents to be with me. You know he didn't do it. But the others, they don't know him well enough.

"We could have faced this complicated situation together. Do you think I wouldn't have faced the accusations and the wolves' fury to have you by my side?" Edward's words, along with his closeness, almost made you wish you had never left.

"You're impulsive sometimes. We wouldn't have survived long together if we were responsible for the pain of the people we love. Not to mention that when you and I dated, I wasn't transforming. Maybe that's why I never felt it was wrong for us to be together, but now it's different." Your conversation has taken a deeply melancholic turn, something you didn't want. A relationship discussion is the last thing you planned when you came back to Forks.

"Whether you turn into a wolf or not wouldn't change how I feel about you. It never could. I thought you knew that." Your gaze meets Edward's. You always thought he would see you differently if you transformed into a wolf. Hearing him say otherwise makes you feel things you shouldn't. Feelings you should have abandoned a long time ago.

The rain starts to pour down on you both with force, as if the heavens are watching your argument from a front-row seat. You stare at Edward, trying to understand where discussing the past will lead you. Then, suddenly, your lips and Edward's meet. You don't notice who made the first move, who stepped towards the other first. You only feel the cold sensation of his lips on yours as you deepen the kiss. Your fingers grip Edward's hair tightly while his hands gently hold your waist. Then suddenly, Edward is pulled away from you. Jacob, in his wolf form, charges at him with all his strength. Edward's body falls near the edge of the cliff, which puts you on high alert. Seeing that Jacob is about to attack him again, you know what you have to do. Your body transforms into the wolf version as you run towards Jacob. Even though Edward was taken by surprise, he is recovering when you finish transforming fully into a wolf and attack Jacob. You don't want to hurt Jacob so you decide that instead of biting him or attacking him, you would push him to fall off the cliff with you. And that's what you do. You don't feel anything for a few seconds until the feeling of falling off the cliff is too sudden for you. You start to worry about Jacob when you can't find him. Still in your wolf form, you try to swim to see if you can identify Jacob. You smell him close to where he is and see that he is unconscious. You use your mouth to hold his wolf body until there is no more water.

"Jacob if you're listening to me, I'm sorry." You speak using telepathy. You don't even know if you're apologizing for pushing him off the cliff or for this part right now. You transform into a human again and like an instinct, Jacob's body seems to have realized that for you to provide first aid, it would be better for him to be in the human version as well. You give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation while trying to get him to stay awake. A few minutes later, Jacob wakes up, releasing some water from his mouth. He looks at you, for a few seconds seeming grateful for your help. Until we both notice that we are inappropriate. In the next second, the two transform into wolves again.

"I can explain." You speak telepathically, while Jacob remains silent. You've been following him to his house since you got out of the water. He must be too angry to speak to you, which is killing you inside. You never wanted to hurt him.

"At home." That's all Jacob responds telepathically. He must be really mad. Damn Edward for showing up then. You arrive at the Black house a few minutes later. Jacob heads straight for the shower while you look for something to wear. You shower right after him, both of you in complete silence.

"When were you planning on filling me in about your little affair with Edward Cullen?" Jacob's first words to you once you both finish getting dressed. You try to suppress the part of you that wants to lash out at Jacob for speaking so coldly to you, as if you're Edward's lover.

"To be honest, never. Though I understand why you're angry with me, I'd like to remind you that I'm a single woman. I admit my mistake in kissing a vampire committed to someone else, but none of this has anything to do with you." You speak, trying to be as cold as Jacob.

"Your father would die again if he knew you'd become the kind of person who gets involved with a vampire," Jacob says, looking into your eyes with a seriousness that honestly upsets you. He's aiming to hurt you, perhaps for what you did with him at the cliff.

"Is that what you want to talk about? Not the fact that I threw both of us off a cliff to stop you from hurting Edward? Or that I seem to favor him over you?" You also know how to hurt feelings, or at least that's what you want to demonstrate. But the truth is, you hate hurting Jacob.

"Do you love him?" Jacob asks after several minutes of silence. You move closer to him, sitting beside him. Gently, you place your hand on his face.

"I don't love him like I love you. What I had with Edward is in the past. What you saw was just two people confusing what's already gone with their current moment. Trust me," you say, leaning closer to Jacob. Part of you believes your words, but another part wonders if you're being completely honest.

"Next time you use your wolf form to attack me, I won't go easy on you. Just so you know," Jacob says playfully. You lean in, planting a soft, brief kiss on his lips.

"I'll be eagerly anticipating that moment. And know that I won't go easy on you either," you say, and Jacob smiles, kissing you in response. After the kiss, you hug him tightly, hoping that the concern about how Edward is doing after the cliff incident leaves your mind.

[when-life-gives-you-lemons-if]

I disagree. I can recommend Midnight Saga. Sure, you were a beginner and you have improved a lot since then, but I believe Midnight Saga truly holds up. I replayed it a lot during the summer, and I just can't see what's so bad. Just like the rest of your IFs, the characters are great, it has a good story, and it has a truly unique fantasy premise and worldbuilding and a great spooky atmosphere. Would love a revamp but I still highly recommend the Midnight Saga. Thank u 4 Karel and Lani, btw ♥!!!

Thank you. 💕

Damn, I miss the gang so much.

[haveafuckingfanfic]

*Wisdom Saga Spoilers*

CW for spoilers and TW for mental health, PTSD, S1 and Su1cide.

Many people have probably touched on this, but in the last minute of the song ‘Love In Paradise’ we hear about Odysseus’ time on Calypso’s island. He clearly is still clearly struggling with the death of Telemachus and the rest of his crew.

These lines stand out to me:

“‘Odyseus?’”

“‘All I hear are screams…’”

“‘Ody, get away from the ledge.’”

“‘You don’t know what I’ve gone through! You don’t know what I’ve sacrificed! Every comrade I long knew, every friend, I saw them die! All I hear are screams...’”

“‘You will be fine dear, come back inside dear. Love of my life comeback~

‘Every time I close my eyes…’

‘~to paradise. I know your life’s been hard, I’ll stay inside~’

‘All I hear are scream!’

‘~your heart.~’

‘All I hear are screams!!~’

‘I love your mind dear, all of our time here. Life would be so much worse if you had died.~’

‘~Just let me close my eyes!’

~Please stay away from harm. Stay in my open arms.’”

Jorge captured the affects of PTSD so well. As a PTSD survivor, it hit home. The depression that sets in after a traumatic event is very intense and can be overwhelming. For survivors, we enter a stage of our bodies and minds trying to make sense and process what had happened. This is shown by the lyric above where Ody says he hears the screams of his crew over and over.

Often time we don’t understand that the event we went through was even traumatic at all. In an effort, our brains replay the events as a way for us to process it and it often just ends up causing *more* pain without proper help. Without help, we can dive into depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation. This is clearly shown in Odysseus as well, since his brain isn’t processing what happened he then blames himself for the deaths of his crew and doesn’t know to how to live and cope with such a large tragedy.

This is also where the behavior of pushing others away comes in. This is a common behavior when you are depressed. It’s something that feels too large or traumatic to ‘burden’ others with. We withdraw the more our brain loops and struggles to understand.

If your brain doesn’t comprehend the trauma or make sense of it, it searches for escapes. Thus where suicidal ideation, hyper-sexuality, and self harm is introduced. It serves as a distraction, a way to cope or a way out of the pain. That’s why we find Odysseus contemplating and attempting suicide. He wants a way away from the way his mine plays and replays his trauma. He sees no other way out and is driven to the cliff. There’s a level of exhaustion that comes with constantly dealing with trauma, that exhaustion will also fuel suicidal thoughts.

And to circle back to the beginning, with PTSD survivors we experience a heightened sense of danger. Our fight or flight is on 24/7, so we will be slow to trust and quick to be on guard. Odysseus is showing these symptoms too, he does not trust Calypso and is quick to let her know that he doesn’t trust her.

So to cap this off, I feel so incredibly seen as a PTSD survivor. The things we go through when we are coping with our trauma and what comes with it are demonstrated clearly in this song. Thank you Jorge💗💗💗

[heromaker-if]

do you have any other ifs that we can read whilst we wait😭😭🫶🫶

Hi anon! Thanks for the ask and your patience! 🥰

I do have some other IFs that I worked on in the past but I don't recommend playing them (I was still learning how to write at that time, so they aren't great). But if you want some IF reccs, I can recommend some IFs I've read recently.

(Sorry for the tags friends, and for the rants!)

(Released) My all time favourite is The Fernweh Saga by @lacunafiction - it's just genuinely so good and it always gives me the vibes of one of those shows you watch after dinner, that becomes part of your routine and you want to see desperately what happens after, and the characters become part of your memories, almost like people. It's just UGH such a good IF. If you like nostalgic hometown horrors, this IF is for you.

(Released) Very close favourite is Blood Moon by @barbwritesstuff - WEREWOLVES GUYS!! I've replayed this game so many times. It's one of those games that after you finish, no matter how long of a break you take from it, you always return to it. I love the "found family" of this game, even though it's not really found, it's just... family. I miss them! The romance in this story is also written so beautifully.

(Released) Another fav is The Golden Rose by @anathemafiction - it was one of my favs while it was still in WIP and after it's released I took so long to play it cause I never wanted to finish it. Like, I grew so attached to its story that I didn't want to let it go. 😭 Very well written characters and the descriptions of things, places, feelings, expressions, mannerisms, is so endearing and eye-catching, never a second where I skipped a line, I was CAUGHT. If you like a story with ominous beginnings, middles and ends, this is for you, not to mention the whole religion themes that are so interesting to dive into.

(Released) I miss this one so much but The Soul Stone War by @intimidatingpuffinstudios - there's two books out for this one already and each one is better than the previous. It's fantasy and about powers and there's a dragon lady that you can romance, and the POLY IN THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! Very soulmate-y romance and just generally captivating storytelling.

(Released) Nothing will ever hit the same as The Passenger by @the-passenger-if - there's just something so familiar, so memorable about this story. I don't think in my next lifetime I will ever forget it. It's about an eldritch horror battling with humanity and it's raw primal role as a monster. It feels short but only because you're so into it that time passes you by, but the tone and the flow of this story is very well done (as well as the characters! 🥰).

(WIP) I feel like everyone and their mothers know about Infamous by @infamous-if - but I'm going to talk about it anyways. It's a BAND IF, yes, music, yes, adrenaline, fame, and all the bad decisions that come with it. It's only one chapter out right now, but it's very worth it. I guarantee you the brainrot you will get from this game is going to consume your life.

(WIP) A somewhat popular one as well is Body Count by @bodycountgame - I haven't seen a game do the whole modern reality TV show with a tinge of horrifying brutal horror as well as Nell has, and even though it's still in its early stages, it's very well done and interesting. Lots of ROs to choose from, and genuinely funny humour to laugh about in between the crying sessions of a favourite character dying.

(WIP) Haven't heard that many people talking about this one to be fair but Chop Shop by @losergames - Also a very early stages game, but it's very adrenaline inducing and has so much potential that has me shaking in my seat. I'm already half in love with the cast and I can't wait to go need for speed and play a super chaotic individual.

Also any game by @hpowellsmith, they're amazing at creating consistent well written stories that have such great characters and even better representation. They do it so well, and I've been a fan of them for years now, definitely one of my role models!

I'm sure there are many more IFs out there that you NEED to play/read, but my mind is blank right now, and these are the only ones I could think of. I also don't have as much time to get into an IF, but I'm getting there (thinking of getting into Shepherds of Haven - which you should!)

[beefrobeefcal]

Dark!Frankie Saga: VIII

Chapter Eight: Linger

Pairing: Dark!Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Summary:

Boston. The Frontiersmen is a crime syndicate that deals in drugs, arms, and anything else they can to keep themselves on top. Since the original ring leader, Tom, was allegedly taken out by a rival gang, it's now run by Big Fish, with Pope second in command. Ironhead runs the numbers and Benny is the muscle. Your family member put you down as collateral when they needed credit to score more smack. Problem is, they can't pay it back, and Big Fish & the Frontiersmen always get their payment...

Rating: Explicit 18+ (MDNI)

Chapter Word Count: 4,438

Content Warning: smutty smutty smut smut, angst, threats of violence, crime, snark, violence, betrayal, kissing, abduction, brutal beating, blood, fingering, oral (f receiving), p in the v (unwrapped), cream pie, Big Fish is a bad man

Author's Notes: I know the wait is finally over! Please send any and all complaints to the THOT TANK for further discussion I hope you'll forgive what a deceitful beef I have been. But I'm just getting started...

The biggest, juiciest, wettest thank you to @neverwheremoonchild for being the Beta Fish for Big Fish (get it? Beta'ing the story about Big Fi-... okay, you got it). Thank you, Nevy! 💜🥩💜

thank you to the following for being supportive good eggs & sounding boards: @theywhowriteandknowthings @toxicanonymity @xdaddysprincessxx @thehalflifeofloveisforever @umnitsa @softpascalito @noxturnalpascal

And this is not the Chubby!Frankie we know and love in the Catfish & the Mouse universe; he's dark, mean, and hungry. I'll be updating this each week (Monday/Tuesday) until you lose interest or I finish it - let's see what happens first! when i feel like it👌

On the Waterfront Masterlist | Previous Chapter

--------<3---------

Your back hit Frankie’s mattress, leaving your legs dangling off the end, his thighs between them and pushing yours open. Leaning down, he slid his hands down your legs and under your sweatshirt, gripping your leggings and pulling them off, along with your underwear. His eyes didn’t leave yours until your core was open and exposed for him. 

“Mr. Morales...”, you breathed, needy and desperate. 

“Babygirl... “, he crooned, crawling up you and pulling your core roughly against his denim-clad hard on. “Can't call me that when I - ” 

You let out a whining moan as he rutted against you, feeling the fabric get hot and damp from your arousal smearing across his crotch.  

“You call me Frankie when I’m fuckin’ you.” 

***** 

Benny knew you were done with him now. His outburst had solidified that. As he sat and let the horrible incident replay over and over in his head, he became sullen and devastated. He couldn’t let it go. After Will stuck him in Frankie’s office to cool down and left him to find Pope, Benny's temper had finally died down, leaving him alone with the image of your heartbroken face in his mind. And then Frankie... 

Fuck Fish. Fuck him and his fuckin’ fucked up, cruel prerogative. 

He knew what would happen next. Frankie would get to walk in and pick up your pieces and make you believe you were loved. He knew Frankie could be gentle, he’d seen it before, and even he was fooled into thinking the Big Fish had a heart. But he knew the price that was paid each time he let that side out, and it made Benny sick to think how carefully he would handle each one of your shards as he put you back together with the promise of him being a good man. A fucking lie. All of it. Frankie was no better than any of them, and in some ways, he was worse. He, just like Will and Pope, could pass in the real world as normal, adjusted, and good people, and that made all three of them dangerous, but Frankie was worse.  Will could come off as cold, and Pope would always have something off about him, and Benny was okay until his temper took over, but Frankie... he knew how to gain people’s trust better. With his big brown eyes and his quiet nature, he could charm anyone with little effort, and you’d be in the throes of being consumed by him before you realized just how fucked up he really was.  

Benny realized he had unintentionally laid the perfect path for you to fall right into Frankie's arms and drown in him. Like so many girls before you. 

***** 

You keened and arched your back as Frankie opened you up with his fingers, and his mouth tongued and sucked on your over sensitive bud. One hand firmly gripping his hair and the other, having pushed up your shirt, twisting your nipple, you cried out and came hard. He growled, pulling more from you, and not letting up, and your cries became high-pitched whines. When he finally released you, giving you a reprieve, your body let go of all its tension and went limp, leaving you panting. He stood up, smiling, and removed his clothing.  

“Shirt off. Wanna feel all of you, gorgeous.”, he said quietly. Despite the soft tone and gentle look in his eyes in the dimly lit room, you knew it was a demand - an order - and you obeyed. 

His eyes wandered over your body as his hulking frame approached the bed, and his thick, heavy hard cock bobbed and wept with every movement.  

“So fuckin’ pretty...”, he huffed as he crawled between your legs, his stomach pushing you into the mattress as you felt the full weight of his body precariously brushing against yours. 

“So big...”, you mewled in a whisper in response.  

“Big, huh, baby? You like me big?”, he grunted in response and his plump tip pushed against your aching, worked-over hole. 

“Please... plea - ugh!” 

Your pleas were cut short as he pushed into you. He gave you no time to adjust to his thick intrusion, and he hushed you as you gasped and dug your nails into his shoulders. 

“Good girl... you can take it... relax... good girl... oh, fuck, take it... take it... jesus... fuck!” 

He stopped about halfway, pulling back, before he thrusted all the way in with his hands on either side of your head, propping him up. He kept eye contact, watching your face and every twitch and twist it made as he seated himself deeply in you, 

“Fuck... got me out of breath... so fuckin’ pretty...”, he panted.  

He was struggling to regain his composure as you fluttered and spasmed around him; it felt like the air was being forced out of your lungs. 

“I-I need, you... need you to move... please, move!” 

“Tell me, baby girl...” He licked his lips and looked down at you heavy lidded with his mouth pulled up on one side in a smile. “Tell me your mine.” 

A choked whine came out as you nodded your head to him. 

“Say it... say you’re mine, baby... say... say I’m yours...” 

“You’re m-mine...” 

“My name, Honey...” 

“Frankie...Frankie... my Big Fish...” 

You felt your toes curl as one knee hitched up on his hip when he began to rock into you. He slowly brought himself down to his elbows and you were fully pinned down by his bodyweight. He dug his face into your neck and breathed you in and your hands held onto his shoulder and hair. Frankie kept his pace, hitting a sweet spot over and over. 

“First time – the first time I saw you... fuckin’ knew... gotta relax, Honey...fuck... fuck... make those sweet noises for me, baby... fuckin’ knew I was yours... god, so pretty... then you fuckin’ made that shephard’s-jesus, yeah... oh fuck, yes... that’s it... so good, baby girl...” 

He brought his face up and nudged his nose to yours. “You’re too fuckin’ good, Honey.”, he whispered against your mouth as he kissed you. 

***** 

He’d been alone in the office for longer than he realized, mulling over everything, when Benny looked up to the dated clock on the wall. He had no idea why Will was taking so long to find that little smug shit, Pope. Fucking Pope. 

Benny was lost in his thoughts again when he heard frantic footsteps out in the hallway, coming towards him. The door burst open, and Pope had a panicked look on his face. He ran towards Benny and grabbed his arms. 

“Benny! Ben? Will... Will- where is he??” 

“He went to find you-why? What happened?” 

“No... I didn’t see him... but outside... outside... in the alley... I... no... Will!” 

Benny’s eyes went wide, and he pushed Pope off him. “What’s in the alley?!?” 

“I went to... to find him and there’s blood... there’s blood and his phone...” 

Benny’s whole body was pumbled by a wave of cold dread. His mouth went dry, and he had to fight to speak.  

“Wh-what...Pope... Santi... no... no... show me.” 

***** 

“Give me another... come on, babygirl... gimme another... lemme feel it...I’m close... fuck... come on... come on...” 

You threw your head back as he pounded into you, digging your nails into his sweaty back and shoulders. Every time his hips ground flush with yours, you felt like you were being split apart in deliciously harsh ecstasy, and you could feel another orgasm slipping along your spine to your core. You felt your body start to shake and tears welled up in your eyes. 

“Fish... Frankie... I need... please...” 

Frankie’s mind reeled. He’d opened himself up and, instead of just claiming you like he had planned, he’d allowed you to call him yours. His fractured self-worth wouldn't let him surrender that easily, and the cold, hard walls that he’d let you slip past refortified, forcing you back out. He knew he could only let you in long enough to get you where he wanted you and what he needed from you – your surrender. 

His hand moved and wiped an errant tear from your temple and your hand went to his face. Your soft eyes bore into his and Frankie knew in that very moment he was going to hurt you; it was inevitable. You’d gotten under his skin, and he had to get you out because you were too good.  

Before your fingers could commit each prickle of his stubble to memory, he grabbed your hand roughly and pinned it above your head, then grabbed the other. He shifted the angle of his hips, and his eyes went dark – cold and hard – like a switch had been flipped, like he saw you as nothing but a hole to fuck and take as his. He snapped his hips sharply, knocking the wind out of you. It was harsh and felt less like the lovemaking he had been giving you and more like he was getting what he wanted out of this.  

It was almost too much, but the feeling of his cock bruising you inside, his heavy sweating body smashing into you on the outside, and his intimately intense stare made that hot coil spring free, and you came crying out his name.  

“Give it to me... good... fuckin’... girl... that’s it... yeah... give it to me... jesus... so fuckin’ wet... oh fuck... baby girl... fuck... gonna come in you... you’re mine... mine... fuckin’ mine... mine... mine, mine, mine!” 

You felt his pace falter then slow as he pushed deep into you. He groaned loudly and you felt him throb as he unloaded into you. He stilled, breathing hard, and, despite your best efforts, avoided eye contact.  

“Frankie?”, you murmured, unsure of what had happened or if you had done something wrong. Your stomach twisted as dread began to fill your senses. Your hand shakily found his cheek, and, thankfully, he leaned into your touch. 

He turned his head and kissed the palm of your hand, then finally looked you in the eye. His own were back to his brown softness again, and relief washed over you as you felt your heart beat in your throat. You smiled softly at him, and he returned one in kind, but it felt hollow.  

You pushed those feelings aside while you tried to bask in the afterglow. 

***** 

Benny screamed out, dropping to his knees in the parking lot outside the Frontiersmen’s building. They’d searched everywhere and all they found was Will’s smashed cell phone, tire treads, and bloody drag marks that started in the alley with a deep scarlet pool of blood. The security cameras only showed an unmarked van pull into the lot then out of it. Beyond this, they had nothing else. 

“Ben... dude... we’ll find him.” 

Pope squatted beside him and placed a sympathetic hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze. He felt the younger man’s shoulders shake as small, quiet sobs wracked his body. 

“Where is he?? Who did this???”, Benny screamed out, agony tearing at his throat.  

“We gotta... we gott tell Fish... get Fish.” 

***** 

You opened your eyes and saw that Frankie had his back to you, facing the wall, and you felt cold. Despite him being right beside you, and not having a wall between you, he felt farther away than ever, and that hollowness, that dread that you’d managed to suppress was washing over you in waves. Just as you reached out to touch his wide, freckled back, you heard an anguished scream from outside.  

Frankie shot up right, and in his haste to get out of bed, shoved you out of his way harshly and quickly started putting his pants on. 

“Get dressed.”, he snapped, not looking at you. 

You sat frozen on the bed, the blanket pulled up to your chin, not sure what to make of his dismissive and cold attitude in combination with the activity outside. When he noticed your lack of movement, he snapped his fingers at you. 

“Hey! I told you to get dressed! Fuckin’ listen!” 

You jumped at his aggressive tone and made quick work getting your clothing back on. As you pulled your sweatshirt over your head, he motioned to the door.  

“Go to your room. If I need you, I’ll get you.” 

Cold. His voice, his glare, his words, his stance... he was cold to you. And it stung. You nodded and left his room, keeping your head low so that he wouldn’t see the tears welling up in your eyes. 

You closed your door, noting that the latch for the knob was no longer working. Sliding down the back of the door, you sobbed into your knees. 

Frankie left his room and as he lingered outside of yours, he heard you; your quiet hitched breaths and soft whimpers punctured him, and it hurt more than he thought he could. But he couldn’t let his guard down again; he couldn’t be gentle or soft or anything else you would need. He couldn’t give you what he refused to acknowledge but he knew was true – himself to you completely. He couldn’t love you. But his warped thinking and broken psyche told him he didn’t need to offer any explanation. He was Frankie ‘Big Fish’ Morales, head of the Frontiersmen, and he didn’t have to answer to anyone, including you. Frankie made up his mind and convinced himself you knew this was what it had to be, and you were going to be fine with it. He pulled himself away from your door, wiping his eyes quickly as he exited the hallway into the common room. 

***** 

Loud noises and yelling interrupted your crying, and you pressed your ear to the door while wiping your eyes. You could hear Benny, shrieking and panicking, as well as muffled yelling from both Frankie and Pope. You could only make out the odd word like ‘Will’ and ‘Gone’ from Benny. 

Challenging your own fears of Frankie’s retribution, you left your room and pushed open the door, and saw Pope holding Benny back as he screamed at Fish. 

“YOU FUCKER! YOU FUCKIN’ TRAITOR! YOU GO OUT AND YOU FIND HIM!” 

“Ben - if he’s gone, he’s gone. Make your fuckin’ peace!” 

“YOU STUPID FAT FUCK! I FUCKIN’ HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!!” 

Pope saw you first, turning his head causing Frankie to look and he scowled at you. 

“I fuckin’ told you to stay in your fuckin’ room!”, he boomed, pointing towards the doorway you’d come through.  

You clenched your fists and stood your ground, but Benny ripping himself from Pope’s grip shifting his focus once again. 

“Honey, tell him! Tell Fish he has to find Will! Please! Make him!”, Benny pleaded, grabbing your arms.  

His blue irises seemed to shine brighter in contrast with the bloodshot whites of his eyes, and his cheeks were red and tearstained. You were so confused but your heart broke for him none the less. 

Before you could answer, Frankie grabbed the hood of his sweatshirt and ripped him away from you.  

“Don’t you fuckin’ touch her! She’s not yours to fuckin’ even look at!”, Frankie bellowed as Benny fell back onto the floor. Benny watched in horror as Frankie snapped his fingers at you and aggressively motioned for you to stand next to him. But what really twisted the knife was watching you obediently take your place at his side and look up at him. He could never know the terror and heartache you felt, knowingly being used to show everyone that you were nothing more than a thing Frankie owned and controlled. You felt shame as Frankie’s big hand gripped your shoulder, ferociously pulling you against him.  

“You fuckin’ slut! You’re nothin’ but another one of his fuckin’ whores!” 

“Benny... Benny, stop! You don’t underst - “ 

You looked at Benny, shaking your head. You felt Frankie’s grip on you tighten painfully and looking up at him, you saw his jaw clenched tight. Benny stood up, baring his teeth at you like a rabid dog. Turning your gaze back to him, his eyes burned into yours as he stepped closer to you.  

“You think you��re he’s special ‘baby girl’? You think you're the first? You’re just the latest in a fuckin’ convoy of stupid bitches who fell for his bullshit! Do you know what he did to the last one? She fucked Pope!” 

Frankie’s grip on your shoulder loosened up, but you could feel his breathing pick up. 

“Pope is still here! Do you know where she is? Do you know what he does to people?” 

“Benny...”, Frankie warned in a low growl. 

Benny’s face contorted in grief and rage, yelling, “No! No, Fish! You can’t do this to her! Did you tell her about her brother?! Or were you gonna wait until after you fucked her??” 

You looked at Frankie, but his eyes were trained on Benny. You looked back at Benny, but Pope’s disconcerting grin as he watched the two men caught your attention. You watched as he brought his phone up, sent a text, then winked at you. 

“Does she know what happens to people you don’t need anymore?” 

“BENNY! SHUT YOUR FUCKIN’ MOUTH!”, Frankie snarled, pointing at Benny. 

It was like watching two bull dogs circle each other, waiting for the other to make a move. 

A four or five other men came into the room, seemingly at Pope’s message, all of whom you recognized from your time in the compound; they stood with Pope, observing the scene before them, not daring to get involved. You looked back at Benny and Frankie, and let out a sob. 

“What... what happened to Steven?” 

Your small, timid, tear-cracked voice paused the tension, and while Benny looked at you, Frankie continued to stare down at Benny. 

“He’s dead.”, Benny spat out at you. “And it won’t be long before you join him because - “, Benny pointed at Frankie, “he’s a fuckin’ monster!” 

It hit you like a kick in the chest. Yes, he was a drug addict. Yes, he made your family go broke. Yes, he was a selfish asshole. Yes, he pawned you for his next fix. But he was your brother, and he was dead. The weight of Benny’s words hung heavy around your neck, feeling like you were being pulled to the floor. Sorrow, despair, grief and fear pulled at you, tearing into your chest, and you felt like you couldn’t take a breath deep enough to stay afloat. 

You were so lost in your own pain you didn’t realize Frankie was lunging at Benny, knocking him to the ground again. What brought you back were the sickening sounds of flesh being pulverized by fists and Benny screaming. 

Frankie’s large body was straddling Benny’s, and he landed blow after blow, yelling and berating him.  

"THINK YOU’RE SO FUCKIN’ TOUGH? YOU’RE A FUCKIN’ DOG. S’ONLY REASON I KEEP YOU AROUND!” 

Benny screamed out in pain as Frankie’s fist made contact with his cheek and a sickening crack sounded out. 

“BREAK THAT PRETTY LITTLE FACE!” 

Pope nodded and the men standing around him moved towards Frankie, attempting to pull him off Benny. 

“GET YOUR FUCKIN’ HANDS OFF ME!” 

He ripped his arms away from the men and tried to land another blow on Benny, but he was held back again by three men, while the other two got Benny up and carried him out of the room. You saw Benny’s bloody face, almost unrecognizable and you saw Frankie’s hands stained and dripping crimson. 

Pope smirked at your horrified expression as he walked in front of Frankie, facing him. Frankie struggled against the men’s hold as much as they did holding him back. He was stil breathing hard in his blind rage. 

“You still got a mean temper, buddy. Even worse now that you’re Big  Fish, huh? I almost forgot how brutal you can be. But Fish… you scared your girl.”, he said quietly with a small grin, but loud enough for you to hear. “Calm down and I’m sure she’ll still suck your dick.” 

Frankie turned and looked at you, and you trembled. His whole face softened as he watched you step back and run back through the door to the bedrooms.  

“No! No Honey!”, he yelled out, throwing the men off him and running after you. 

You ran into your room and propped the chair under the doorknob. Frankie banged on the door.  

“No, baby, please! I’m sorry!” 

He pushed the door open, making the shitty carpet crease under the chair’s legs, and you saw his whole front was speckled in Benny’s blood. You couldn’t breathe; your whole body tensed hard enough that you felt like you were suffocating. 

He reached out, gently trying to coax you to him. Your eyes trained on his blood-stained hands, your mind racing with the violence they were proven to be capable of. You jumped back from him, hitting the wall behind you. 

“No! NO!”, you shrieked, panicking with your back against the wall while he cautiously moved towards you.  

Frankie felt his heart sink. “No… no no no no no! No, It’s me, baby girl… it’s your Frankie… I’m yours! I’m not going to hurt you… please baby!” 

Letting out a shaky whine as he approached you, Frankie tried to offer you a reassuring smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes; they were anything but happy. The lingering threads of fury mixed with grief and panic painted them deep mahogany, and there wasn’t an ounce of that colour you could trust. But you had to know the truth. 

“Did you know? D-did you know Steven was… was d-dead??” 

He paused and silently pleaded with you to skip this whole thing and let him take you to bed, to comfort and hold you, and to make you forget – if even for a minute – what a horrible person he was. And let him forget, too. 

“Honey… I… baby, lemme make you feel good… you know I can…” 

But your face didn’t change. It didn’t crack or twinge or show any signs that he was winning, Frankie sighed. “I knew… but you were so upset… I didn’t want to hurt you more…I thought I-” 

He stopped himself when he saw your body tense and your eyes narrow. You saw red. Yes, you were scared, but your anger took over. 

“You piece of shit!”, you screamed as you shoved him back. “You don’t give a shit about hurting me! You fucked me and then made me feel like I was nothing to you! You’re a monster! I don’t want you!” 

“You don’t mean that, baby… I know you don’t… I know you’re scared!”, he pleaded, trying to pull you to him. “I’m sorry! Please… lemma make it better, baby!” 

You slapped your hands on his body, crying, trying anything to get him away from you. He grabbed your wrists, and the smell of blood was overwhelming. You let out a scream, and Frankie grabbed you, forcing you into his hold. 

“Come on… it’s me… don’t fight me, baby girl… please… it’s me, your Frankie…” 

You thrashed against him, struggling to escape his grasp. Frankie was desperate to calm you, but his patience was running out. You kicked out one of your legs, and your heel came into contact with his kneecap. He let you go, and you gasped into your hands. 

“Mother fucker!”, he yelled, letting you go and bending over to hold his knee. 

“Frankie! I-I’m sorry! I didn’t- “ 

“You fuckin’ little BITCH!”, he spat at you, eyes snapping up to your face.  

Your blood ran cold as Frankie stood to his full height and towered over you. You were convinced his next action would be the last you would ever witness. 

“I gave you a fuckin’ chance! You wanna play stupid fuckin’ games? Huh?” Frankie got his face uncomfortably close to yours and once again, you could smell the sick metallic scent of blood on him as his hand gripped your neck. “Listen to me carefully. I own you. I own your life. And do you know what that makes you? A fuckin’ dead junkie’s whore sister.” 

“Frankie… I’m sorry – “ 

“Shut you fuckin’ mouth when I’m talking.” 

The low register of his tone reverberated in your body, and he stood back, releasing your neck. He needed to hurt you like you hurt him, but he couldn’t bring himself to hit you, not now. Not with that look on your face and your chin quivering. But he needed to hurt you like your rejection hurt him. His eyes caught the Kindle sitting on your bedside table, and he felt like he was winning again. He looked back at you.  

“Whores don’t read.”, he snarled, then snatched up the Kindle. 

“Frankie, no! No!”, you shrieked again, reaching up for your only escape. 

He held the Kindle out of your reach and gripped it in both hands, bending it until you heard plastic and metal snap and break. Frankie watched as you screamed out with your eyes fixed on the destruction of your only respite, your only comfort.  

What he didn’t anticipate was the immense guilt that crashed over him as you looked him in the eye with absolute horror on your face. He also wasn’t expecting you to turn and run out of the room, bolting as fast as you could to get away from him. 

You had no idea where you were going, but you let your feet take you through the common room, through the hallway… You were coming up to Frankie’s office when Pope walked out from around the corner and grabbed you, holding your back flush to his front. 

You went to scream, but Pope covered your mouth with a chemical smelling cloth as he cooed softly in your ear, and everything began to fade around you. 

“Don’t worry, baby girl…  I got you.” 

***** 

The sounds that surrounded him fogged his brain. When he opened his heavy eyelids, he saw nothing but dark and light faded shapes, his eyes wouldn’t focus and the ache that throbbed behind them in his skull was only exceeded by the sharp pain in his abdomen with each breath he took.  

Where the hell was he? He tried thinking back to what he could remember, to try and get his bearings, but the last thing he could see was Santi walking away after...  

No...  

No Santi... he didn’t... 

“Well, Mr. Miller...”, a deep, unfamiliar voice boomed, breaking him from his waking nightmare. “Welcome back to the land of the living.” 

--------<3---------

TAGLIST: @theywhowriteandknowthings @harryleatherfit @toxicanonymity @harriedandharassed @neverwheremoonchild @rebel-held @beee-haw @nevergoingbacknowshine @idolatrybarbie @v4vayha @lalocitos @xdaddysprincessxx @deathsholywaterr @heareball @lyssramscal @wintrwinchestr @nerdieforpedro  @southernbe @starkeydaviss @noxturnalpascal@not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @vabeachazn @clawdee @iamasaddie @tightjeansjavi @rubyfruitjungle

[lacunafiction]

🌲 The Fernweh Saga: Book One has been updated!🌲

Hi Returning Visitors, I hope you're doing well.

A heartfelt ‘thank you’ to those of you who have taken the time to venture into Fernweh. The next time you return to town, you’ll notice an update that will allow you to replay chapters. This new checkpoint system allows you to more easily explore the town’s secrets, character exchanges, MC reactions, and much more by letting you replay chapters without starting the book over!

As always, if you enjoyed your time in Fernweh, please consider reviewing/rating it.

Thank you for your support and for helping me spread the news! 💚

✨DEMO✨  | GooglePlay, Steam , Apple, Choice of Games

Book One Launch Post 📚

🌲TFS Patreon🌲  (New, alpha content from Book Two available!🎉)

[drkineildwicks]

More Pokémon

More BH6

It’s back. :O

In the ongoing saga of Obake and Tadashi get Isekai’ed…Obake is finally warming up to his Pokémon but now he’s gotta deal with the fact that yes they do get bigger good night I wasn’t expecting Golbat to be so massive in-game it looks like it could swallow my player whole. :O

In other news, after this batch you probably won’t be seeing more of this until the summer—didn’t realize the last time my computer went to the shop that the Ryujinx emulator stored save data in roaming apps, so when I told the guy yeah you can wipe it I lost my save data.  So now I get to replay the whole thing and get back to where I was…dangit this is why I save everything OFF my computer stupid emulator! :shakefist:

Find it on Eclipse here, as always please be kind and reblog, not repost, thank you! :D

Pokémon © Game Freak; Nintendo

Big Hero 6 © 2014 Disney

Done in Adobe Photoshop.

[silenzahra]

What's up Zahra? I have a question for you.

What's your favorite Mario RPG other than the Mario & Luigi series?

You can take as much time to answer as you want.

Take care!

What's up, Mugi? Thank you so much for sending this ask! 🥰 I'm sorry I took forever to get to it, but I hope you'll like my answer!

Actually, my choice is very clear:

✨ The Thousand-Year Door ✨

This game means EVERYTHING to me 😍 It was my first Paper Mario game and my second RPG ever (only after Superstar Saga), and oh God, I fell so in love with the characters, the story, the mechanics, the music! It's a game that's so full of surprises and charisma, and the fact that it was told as a play only made it cuter to my eyes 🥹

Honestly, playing this game again after almost 20 years of trying it for the first time on my Wii (I borrowed the original from my cousin as I didn't have a GameCube)... It hit hard in the nostalgia 🥹 When I tell you I couldn't stop crying when it was announced in the direct last year! And then, again, when I started playing it, especially with the soft and beautiful music as the book opens and the story starts...

I have to admit I'm getting emotional just by remembering it 🥹

It's really been so great to replay it! I've loved rediscovering again not only the story of the game itself, but also those of the different characters. Especially the partners! If I may, I wanna mention my three favorites!

Mini Yoshi and Goombella are simply amazing. Their personalities shine through! He's so bold and ready to fight, and she's so smart and sassy. I adore them wholeheartedly 🥹

And then...

My beautiful and beloved Vivian 💜 She holds a very special place in my heart. As a fun fact, she was always trans in the Spanish version of the original game, but of course, I was incredibly happy when it became something official worldwide! In this screenshot, she's actually telling Mario THE line: "It took me some time to realize that I was their sister... and not their brother." You best believe I've cried every single time I've read it, both when playing the game and on the internet 🥹

Also, the places! 😍 My personal favorite is Glitzville, because I love everything about that chapter in general. Having to fight battle after battle to climb the rankings in order to reach the top spot and being crowned champion? And in each battle you have to follow specific guidelines? Not to mention the different opponents you encounter and all the secrets hidden in this place! Absolutely AWESOME 🤩

Also: that Game Boy Advance on the wall does make the sound the console did when you turned it on. I'm a sucker for details like this as they hit nostalgia hard, so it was just another reason to love this part of the game even more 💖

Still, I also loved Twilight Town, the sea and the entire chapter that takes place in the train (can never remember its name in English 😅). I mean, just look!

Also. Mario going 👍 all the freaking time is a silly and adorable detail that made me giggle all the time 🤭❤️

I dont think I need to mention I cried my heart out when I finished replaying this game about a month ago 😅 Every single scene after I defeated the final boss just brought more and more tears to my eyes, and I just couldn't erase the silly smile from my face as I relived such a beautiful and touching ending (I'll add a few more pics under the cut so as not to spoil anyone). This game earned a really big place in my heart 20 years ago and it has only increased after playing the remake 🥹❤️

Thank you again for this ask, @megamagimugi! I hope the wait was worth it 🥰

⚠ SPOILERS BELOW ⚠

The Thousand-Year Door after you've collected every single crystal star reminds me so much of the one in Super Mario Land 2!

The moment of saying goodbye... You bet I was right there, crying with my beloved Mini Yoshi 😭

And Vivian about to tell Mario that she loves him! AAAAAHHHH my beloved shadow girl 😭💜✨

Also, loved how Mario's way of saying goodbye was, again...

Just brilliant 🤭❤️

And then... all this last sequence with Peach and Mario looking at Rogueport as they part had me UGLY crying.

As well as, of course...

I have just made myself emotional by re-visiting the ending of this game 🥹🥹🥹 The idea of them parting on a new adventure, and then celebrating the ending of the play on stage with all the partners, and Luigi being among the audience...

It's perfect. It's just perfect.

I just love every single thing about this game so so much ❤️❤️❤️

[mistysolitude]

Do you like The Lord of the Rings?

Actually, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!

The Lord of the Rings is one of the sagas that most impacted me in so many different ways, and Tolkien's words (and the movies, of course) inspire some of my own - and myself as a person!

I rewatch all the films and try to read all books every year. It's like my little yearly ritual (alongside replaying Skyrim).

And, to add to my yapping, here are some LOTR stuff I have around me:

A collection of Tolkien books + the movies; the three books of a special LotR edition; a hardcover The Hobbit edition in German; AND I carry a lil LEGO Frodo in my keychain :)

Also, I'm planning on tattooing the Witch-King of Amgmar's helm on my shin yeyyy

Thank you so much for your question!

[lunar-years]

Ten First Lines

Thanks for the tag, @morethanslightly ! Ten lines from ten stories, which for me are pretty much entirely current and previous Ted Lasso ot3/variations fanfics, lol :)

Things were great. (from rjk friends with benefits/Jamie father fic, Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley, WIP)

tw suicidal thoughts ///////// Roy wasn’t going to do it, but if he were to kill himself, he’d use the drawerful of old pills he’s got by his toilet. (from the unpublished chapter 2 of you're still out there on your own (and i'm still the last to go), Ted Lasso, Roy/Keeley, WIP)

The thing is, it wasn’t supposed to go like this for Jamie. (from unpublished chapter 3 of you're still out there on your own (and i'm still the last to go), Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley, WIP)

He never does figure out how exactly it happens, but the facts replay in his mind on a constant, endless reel. (from untitled Jamie time loop fic, Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley, WIP)

According to her text from earlier Keeley’s shoot that night was supposed to run late, so Jamie wasn’t expecting the sound of her key in his lock when it came. (from you're still out there on your own (and i'm still the last to go) chapter one, Ted Lasso, Jamie/Keeley)

All week London had been under a surprisingly severe cold spell, considering it was early December. (from last to leave the party, Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley)

“What is this?” Jamie asked, biting back the panicked whimper he felt rising in his throat. (from and it's back to daydreams (again), Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie)

“The holidays can be a very difficult time of the year for many people,” Dr. Sharon says kindly, peering over at him in her usual, steady manner. (from Tinsel, Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley)

“You ever met her mum before?” Jamie asks Roy, twiddling his thumbs in his lap. (from Sparks, Ted Lasso, Roy/Jamie/Keeley)

Fred dies in much the same way as Barbara. (from strange as angels, the as-yet unpublished part 3 of my st s4 saga, Stranger Things, Jonathan/Nancy, WIP [I WILL finish this...one day...i swear....])

No pressure tagging: @jamietarttsnorthernattitude @abubblingcandle @izzyspussy if any of you feel inclined to join in :)

[optiwashere]

what other RPG games do you like?

Heya anon, what a fun question! If I sat and listed all the RPGs I like, it would take forever. Here's a ramble instead because I'm bored on a Sunday.

I've been playing basically any kind of RPG since I got a copy of Fallout 1 in... 1999? '98? I was too young for it, but I was also too young to watch horror films then and look at how I turned out.

Pretty sure I blindly walked into the Glow in one of my first playthroughs and didn't understand why my character kept dying afterwards lmao.

Then I got into BG with BG2 when it was released. After that I started reading Drizzt novels, and that's where everything went wrong.

Either way, I like pretty much any kind of RPG. If you can find it on GOG, Steam, or Abandonware sites, I've probably at least tried it. Old-school, draw a map, tile-based dungeon crawlers like Pool of Radiance or Might and Magic? Yep, love those games. All the Infinity Engine games and their modern clones? Yep! I'm really hoping we get a Pillars of Eternity 3 some day. Even though I think they've all had massive problems so far and I've had bad interactions with the company's community management, I'll probably play the next Owlcat game too. I loved the Mass Effect and Dragon Age games when they came out, but I'm eh on ME2/3 and DA is a really uneven series. I'm less into JRPGs these days, but I've played stuff like Chrono Trigger, Persona, and most of the Final Fantasy series.

Speaking of FF, strategy RPGs are just so, so good and I've had to make do with constant replays of Final Fantasy Tactics and Tactics Ogre for years...

Tabletop RPGs are my only other real hobby these days besides writing, and I'm currently on a break from running anything. I plan on running either Dungeon Crawl Classics or the MCDM RPG (if it's out by then) when I'm ready for another campaign.

I've been a Larian fan since Divinity 2 (that's the Dragon Knight Saga, not Original SIn) and the fact that they got handed BG3 is still kinda surreal even now lol. I remember Kickstarting D:OS1 and thinking it was such a fun tactical RPG with just awful characters. That's what all of their games were like before D:OS2, really. Look how far they've come! And they managed to make a system that I think is largely bad for tactical play pretty fun.

OH! I also love ARPGs. I'm thankful I don't have a real hour count of my Diablo 2 playtime since ca. 2001, because it would not reflect well on me. My Path of Exile playtime is already dangerously concerning.

[morganadpl]

Another heir - Chapter 4

« Are you spying on me ? »

Draco Malfoy story

Draco Malfoy x Ravenclaw

Warnings : Spoilers Harry Potter saga

—————————

Helena shifted her weight, feeling the cool night breeze against her skin. She turned to Draco, a thoughtful look in her eyes. "So, what's on your mind? What's keeping you up at night?"

Draco hesitated before replying, his voice quiet. "My father."

Helena nodded, understanding that he wouldn't say more. She decided to share a piece of her own story instead. "I lost my father two years ago. He was very sick. Ever since then, I've had a hard time sleeping, but walking around at night helps me clear my head."

Draco glanced at her, his expression hardening slightly. "I suppose you're happy my father's in prison. After all, he was at the Ministry at the end of last year."

Helena shook her head slowly. "I'm not happy, Draco. I understand that it's not easy for you. But I know that just because your father is where he is, it doesn't mean you're the same person. We are not carbon copies of our parents. You are your own person, Draco. I understand that you miss him, but you shouldn't let others—or yourself—define you by his actions."

Draco looked at her, a flicker of surprise in his eyes. He seemed to be processing her words, the tension in his shoulders easing just a little. "You really believe that?"

"Yes, I do," Helena said softly. "We all have our own paths to walk. You can choose to be different."

For a moment, the two stood in silence, the only sound the rustling of leaves in the wind. Helena could feel a shift in the air, a tentative bridge forming between them.

"Thanks," Draco finally said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll keep that in mind."

Helena smiled gently. "Anytime, Draco."

They stood together, gazing at the stars, finding a shared solace in the quiet of the night.

And so these late-night meetings became a ritual. Each evening, they found solace in the Astronomy Tower, gazing at the stars and engaging in quiet conversations. Draco remained distant in his responses, but he couldn't deny that he appreciated Helena for not judging him as the selfish, arrogant son of a Death Eater. He valued her presence, even if he couldn't fully express it.

Draco found himself questioning many things. Helena's acceptance and understanding were a stark contrast to the expectations placed upon him. Yet, he couldn't forget the mission he had been given. The internal battle of his emotions was intense, tearing him between loyalty to his family and the glimmer of a different path.

For Helena, these nightly talks were a rare opportunity to open up about her own struggles, especially about her father. Draco, in his own reserved way, understood her pain without showing pity, which made her feel less alone. His empathy was subtle, but it was there, and it meant the world to her.

As weeks went by, their connection grew stronger. They exchanged discreet smiles in the corridors and at the dining tables, a silent acknowledgment of their shared secret. Their friendship, if it could be called that, remained hidden from prying eyes. Helena appreciated these moments of vulnerability and camaraderie, and Draco found a small respite from his burdens.

Their bond was a delicate balance of unspoken understanding and mutual respect, blossoming quietly in the shadows of their nightly rendezvous.

One evening, Helena arrived at the Astronomy Tower earlier than usual. She needed a moment alone. The previous night, she had been haunted by a dream of her father, watching him take his last breath while her mother pleaded with him to fight and stay. Helena stood powerless at the foot of the bed, the scene replaying over and over in her mind. She had woken up with a start, disoriented and sorrowful. The day had seemed interminable.

Desperate to distract herself, Helena attempted to work on her astronomy homework, but she couldn't focus. She was trying to locate the Gemini constellation when she heard footsteps behind her. Draco had arrived.

He quietly sat down beside her, observing her for a moment before asking, "What are you reading?"

Helena sighed, a hint of frustration in her voice. "I'm trying to do this stupid assignment, but I just can't focus."

Draco took her assignment from her hands, glancing at it. "You're already looking at the best constellation."

Helena looked at him curiously. "Why do you say that?"

Draco smirked slightly. "Because it's my sign."

Helena laughed, the tension easing a bit. "Mine too."

Draco's smirk softened into a genuine smile. "Well, let's see if we can make some sense of it together." He started pointing out different constellations in the night sky, using the telescope and charts from the tower. He explained the positioning of the constellations in relation to one another, his voice calm and steady.

"Look, here's Gemini," Draco said, adjusting the telescope for her. "And if you move just a bit to the left, you can see Taurus."

Helena leaned in, following his directions. "Wow, I see it. That's incredible."

Draco nodded, then pointed towards another part of the sky. "And over there, that's Orion. It's one of the easiest to find because of the belt stars."

As they continued, Draco's knowledge and passion for astronomy became apparent. Helena found herself not just learning, but genuinely enjoying the process.

At the end of their impromptu lesson, Helena looked at Draco with newfound appreciation. "I didn't know you were so good at astronomy."

Draco shrugged modestly. "My mother taught me a lot when I was younger. It's always been something I enjoy."

Helena hesitated for a moment before asking, "Did your mother choose your name because of a constellation?"

Draco nodded. "Yes, she did. She always loved the stars and the stories behind them."

Helena's curiosity piqued. "Can you show me where it is?"

Draco smiled, pleased by her interest. "Of course." He adjusted the telescope and pointed it towards a specific part of the sky. "There it is, Draco. It's part of the constellation of the dragon, Draco."

Helena peered through the telescope, marveling at the sight. "It's beautiful," she whispered. "I can see why your mother chose it."

Draco nodded, a hint of pride in his voice. "She always said it was a strong name, fitting for a Malfoy."

Helena looked up at him, her eyes reflecting the starlight. "It suits you," she said softly. "You're strong, Draco. Even if you don't always feel it."

Draco looked back at her, his usual guarded expression softening. "Thank you, Helena. That means a lot."

Draco, sensing that they were on a night where the conversation could be deeper, asked, "Helena, why couldn't you concentrate earlier? You excel in all your subjects."

Helena looked at the sky before responding. "I had a nightmare about my father, about his last day. I've never told anyone the reasons for his illness. It's something that gives me a feeling of sadness and also of revenge."

"Revenge? Why?" Draco asked, genuinely curious.

Helena looked at him and, after a few moments, decided that Draco might be one of the few who could understand, even if what she was about to say might make him feel bad about his family. She took a deep breath and began to explain.

"During the first war against Voldemort, my parents were part of the Order of the Phoenix. One night, during a battle against two Death Eaters, one of them, Evan Rosier, cast a curse at my father that he couldn't dodge. It was an infection that grew slowly. At first, everything seemed fine, but no treatment was found. About three years ago, my father was admitted to the hospital. He stayed there for a year, but no cure was found. My nightmare was about the day the infection finally took over."

Draco listened intently, his expression serious. He could sense the weight of her words and the pain behind them. "I'm sorry, Helena," he said softly, genuinely feeling her pain.

Helena nodded, appreciating his sympathy. "It's been hard. I guess that's why I find comfort in the stars. They remind me of him, of the times we spent together before everything changed."

Draco looked up at the night sky, his thoughts conflicted. He understood the burden of legacy and the pain of losing a parent, even if their circumstances were different. "Thank you for sharing that with me. I know it can't be easy."

Helena gave a small, sad smile. "Thank you for listening. It's been a long time since I talked about it."

Draco and Helena said their goodbyes, sensing that their conversation had reached a natural pause. Helena knew she needed rest; tomorrow would be her first class with her ancestor.

Returning to the Ravenclaw Tower, she paused before the imposing door that led to the common room. The bronze eagle knocker seemed almost to watch her as she approached. It posed its riddle, and Helena, accustomed to the practice, quickly solved it, allowing her entry.

The Ravenclaw common room was a circular, airy space filled with the soft glow of enchanted lanterns. The walls were lined with tall, arched windows that offered a breathtaking view of the night sky and the surrounding grounds of Hogwarts. Bookshelves brimming with ancient tomes and modern texts alike stood against the walls, while cozy armchairs and elegant tables were scattered about, inviting students to study or converse.

In the center of the room stood a grand marble statue of Rowena Ravenclaw, her serene gaze and regal bearing inspiring wisdom and calm. Helena walked over to the statue and gazed up at it, feeling a familiar pang of longing and pride. Her father's words echoed in her mind: "You are the rightful heir of a proud family legacy. Your strength comes from your family and your convictions. Always fight for what you believe is right."

Helena took a deep breath, drawing strength from the statue's presence and her father's encouragement. The weight of her heritage felt lighter, more manageable. With a renewed sense of purpose, she turned away from the statue and made her way up the spiral staircase to the girls' dormitory.

Entering the dormitory, she found the room quiet and peaceful, her fellow Ravenclaws already asleep or quietly reading in their beds. She slipped into her own bed, pulling the curtains closed around her. The soft, familiar surroundings of her dormitory brought a sense of comfort, and she allowed herself to relax.

As she settled under the covers, her thoughts drifted back to her upcoming meeting with her ancestor. She knew it would be challenging, but she felt ready to face it. With a final glance at the night sky through the window, she closed her eyes and let sleep claim her, the words of her father lingering in her mind like a protective charm.

The next morning unfolded normally. Helena arrived at the breakfast hall with a smile, accompanied by her best friend Lena. She nodded to her friends from Gryffindor and offered a barely noticeable smile to a certain Slytherin.

At noon, as she was about to enter the Great Hall for lunch, Harry stopped her. "Can we talk outside, just the two of us?" he asked quietly.

Helena raised an eyebrow but nodded. "Sure, Harry. What's on your mind?"

Harry took her by the arm and led them both outside the main entrance, making sure that nobody was in sight. They sat down on a bench near the side of the Great Hall's walls. From there, they had a beautiful view of the mountains, the Black Lake, and, of course, the boathouse—the place where every first-year student first discovers the castle.

After they sat down, Helena turned to Harry, encouraging him to continue with his questions.

Harry glanced around before replying, "How's the start of the year been for you?"

Helena shrugged, trying to keep the conversation light. "Everything's fine. Classes are going well, and it's good to be back." Helena stopped, and looked at Harry who had a strange look on his face, so she continued "But I feel like there's something else you want to ask."

Harry hesitated, then took a deep breath. "I've seen you on the Marauder's Map a few times in the evenings, wandering around the castle. It got me a bit worried."

Helena's heart skipped a beat, but she kept her expression neutral. "Are you spying on me, Harry?"

[sketchylogic]

Finished Small Saga just yesterday and I think it might be one of my favourite games of all time, definitely in my top 3 of the year at least.

Loved the characters, the story, the themes, the musics, the humour, the secrets... I’ll definitely have to show it to friends who can speak english (and replay it because I just realised from rewatching the trailer that I completely missed the fishing minigame like a goof).

I know this is still pretty early since you’ve published the game but I’d gladly give my support to any future projects you’ll make.

Cheers and such

Thank you for playing! I'm glad it's left an impression. You're not alone in missing the fishing minigame. The environment didn't have enough clues of where you could walk or jump. That's on me!

[dr-lizortecho]

tagged by the lovely @crepuscularqueens sorry I always take sooo long to get these done, lol

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

144

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

527,412

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly Roswell New Mexico! Though I dabble in The Vampire Diaries and accept prompts for Lockwood and Co, Fate the Winx Saga, Riverdale and Hadestown

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Something to Celebrate- a short little Chenford dancing scene

Can I lead You Astray?- a rivusa get together fic

Wanna See What’s Under That Attitude- Hallmark Christmas movie fake dating Valevans, which is only so highly rated because I wrote it at fandoms peak interest in the pairing

Swing Life Away- rnm all human au, this was and still is my passion project

Like the Sky- a short missing scene from Lockwood and Co, and an exploration of Lucy’s feelings for Lockwood and Norrie

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I wrote for the community so it’s really cool to discuss the characters

The only exceptions are rude comments get to sit- unless I think it’s a misunderstanding than I’ll respond with a simple redirect and thank you

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Angst is NOT my thing, but probably do you remember? which just has Michael fall asleep before Max can ask about Alex, so it ends in their still fractured pre-show relationship

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All my fic has happy endings pretty much! But the one that probably felt the most joyful to me personally ours which was my first foray into malexa and just ends with the sweetest big group moment

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope! Not since I moved into the rnm fandom, barring like one comment on a Forrest fic all I’ve ever gotten is really really nice interactions <3

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Haha yes, all kinds. From the softest vanilla euphemism full sex to weak ass bdsm (sorry I haven’t quite got hardcore there yet- like I keep blushing and backing out on letting Max wear a collar)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not really- I have one crossover written and another in the works. Rnm/Tvd which kinda writes itself.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope- ik I would be terrible to work with cause I’m super particular, but I’m not against the idea.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

You’re not gonna believe this- Echo

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

The Joniz kidnapping fic! I started back during s3 and formatted the entire thing, only for them to reveal more info on Jones so I had to replay it, and then he actually kidnapped Liz, fed her and dressed her and I was like ‘this is my fic!’

16. What are your writing strengths?

Idk- I think I put a lot of care and effort into making the characters actions and reactions plausible and realistic, cause I studied psychology for a bit and it’s one of my interests, so I just apply it a little too hard. Which feeds into a weakness cause it means I always feel incapable of characters pov’s I don’t think about an absurd amount

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

New POV’s and commas

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love it personally- but the little Spanish I did retain from highschool isn’t enough to actually write it (so I use google translate) but I’m hoping once I have more free time to take up duolingo and actually learn it

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Swing Life Away- it’s like a child to me, however poorly written

no pressure tags @lilshitwayne @morganadw @ajna-eye-cogitations @beautifulcheat @ladynox @maeglinthebold and anyone who wants to!

[beefrobeefcal]

Dark!Frankie Saga: V

Chapter Five: Skin and Bones

Pairing: Dark!Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Summary:

Boston. The Frontiersmen is a crime syndicate that deals in drugs, arms, and anything else they can to keep themselves on top. Since the original ring leader, Tom, was allegedly taken out by a rival gang, it's now run by Big Fish, with Pope second in command. Ironhead runs the numbers and Benny is the muscle. Your family member put you down as collateral when they needed credit to score more smack. Problem is, they can't pay it back, and Big Fish & the Frontiersmen always get their payment...

Rating: Explicit 18+ (MDNI)

Chapter Word Count: 3,164

Content Warning: no smut this chapter :(, violence, threats of violence, crime, snark, baking, talk of character death

Author's Notes:

oooooo, the plot thickens... like out Big Fish's waist line...

The biggest, juiciest, wettest thank you to @neverwheremoonchild for being the Beta Fish for Big Fish (get it? Beta'ing the story about Big Fi-... okay, you got it). Thank you, Nevy! 💜🥩💜

And this is not the Chubby!Frankie we know and love in the Catfish & the Mouse universe; he's dark, mean, and hungry. I'll be updating this each week (Monday/Tuesday) until you lose interest or I finish it - let's see what happens first! 👌

On the Waterfront Masterlist | Previous Chapter

--------<3---------

Pope walked quickly down the hallway, an evil grin slashed across his face. He couldn’t wait to tell Benny what he’d heard, needing to see that blond shit’s face crumble as he tells him that Frankie had taken you as his fully.

The doors to the rec room flew open and Pope sauntered in. As he approached the table where Will and Benny sat, he cleared this throat and stood between them, keeping his glare and smug grin aimed at Benny.

“Never believe what I just heard, Benny...”, he said in a mocking, singsong tone.

Will looked up, already having a thought as to where this was going. His eyes darted to his brother then quickly back to Pope. He put his pen down and adjusted himself in his seat, ready to jump into action, to keep Benny on lock.

“What?”, Benny asked with a partial mouthful, finally looking up from his bowl of Lucky Charms.

“Your girl.”, Pope responded in a harsh, hissing voice as he leaned in and grinned.

Benny looked at him, confusion suddenly melting into frustration.

“The fuck you talkin’ ‘bout, Pope!”, he yelled, throwing his spoon into his half-finished bowl.

“Pope...”, Will warned, his eyes shifting to glare at him.

“Yeah... heard her whining, whimpering... begging for Fish... begging him not to stop.”

Benny stood up, standing over Pope with his fists clenched. “Fuck you.”, he growled.

Wil stood up, standing behind Benny, his hand on his shoulder.

“Cool off, Ben... let it go...”

Pope nodded, fueled by the younger man’s rage. “Yeah... she moaned, man... whined like a whore... and he must’a done something brutal because I heard he yelp like a beaten dog... then she begged for more...”

Before Will could react, Benny grabbed Pope by his jacket and shoved him hard against the wall. The entire room went silent, save for the sounds of heaving breathing filled with rage from Benny.

“Shut your fucking mouth!”

“I could hear her eyes rolling into the back of her head, Benny... I could hear her toes curl... I could hear that sweet, wet cunt of hers being pounded by Fish...”

“FUCK YOU!”, Benny roared, slamming Pope into the wall harder.

Will tried putting himself between the men, trying to get Benny to calm down.

“Ben! Come on! He's just trying to get under your skin, bud!”

“Nah... Fish is fucking with your girl, Ben...”

“Shut the fuck up, Santiago!”, Will barked, desperately trying to pull Benny off him.

“She’s better than that!”, Benny screamed in Pope’s face.

*****

You woke up in your bed, your knees hurting, and you smiled. As you started to come to further, other parts of you felt tender as well; your jaw, your cunt, your scalp, your throat...

The evening’s events replayed in your head as you slowly moved to the bathroom to take a shower.

The sound of him grunting as he fucked your throat.

The feeling of his large hands holding you in place, harshly gripping your hair.

The almost-too-sweet sounds he made as he came, your name falling out of his mouth in a breathy whimper.

The taste of his come, shooting in your mouth, dripping down your chin.

The look in his eye as you sat back on your heels and wiped your mouth.

That look alone could have made you come and fall for him right there; you were not going to escape now. His big, warm, brown eyes, looking down at you, wide and begging. It was a side of him you weren’t sure actually existed, but you saw proof last night that he was, deep down, a sweet man who needed softness. And softness you could be.

To keep yourself safe and secure...right? That’s all this was, right?

As you stood under the steaming hot water, you replayed the night’s events, and knew that you were only fooling yourself. Frankie had you by the throat, and you would have done what you did last night even without Will’s instructions.

The only thing that gave you pause was Benny. The look he gave you as he left the office last night, the remorse painted on his face followed by the disappointment.

As you got out of the shower and dried off, you tried to push any thoughts of Benny away. You got dressed, laid on the bed, waited for Will, and read your kindle.

*****

Will didn’t come.

You waited over an hour and decided to grab your breakfast. Upon leaving your room and getting into the hallway, you could hear talking in the lounge. Frankie’s voice was clear, and the others were...

It was Will and Benny.

It sounded like a tense discussion, and you approached the door so you could hear better.

“A tense discussion doesn’t require five men to pull you off Pope, Benny.”

“Pope just got’im under the skin... s’all it was, Fish.”

“Jesus fuckin’ christ... You know he’s an asshole, Ben! Why’dya let him get you so fuckin’ mad?”

You could hear it was Benny talking, but he was keeping his voice low; you couldn’t hear what he was saying.

“Just fuckin’ ignore him! What the fuck did he say to get you so mad?”

“Fish, it doesn’t matter... I’ll keep him in line.”

“That what you want? Big brother holding your fuckin’ leash?”

Again, Benny’s voice only made sounds not words with how quietly he spoke.

“Don’t fuckin’ give me that! Grow the fuck up and get your fuckin’ mood in check!”

Benny’s voice came through loud and clear in response, dripping with venom.

“Sure thing, Mr. Morales.”

Your eyes opened wide, and you accidentally leaned on the door forcing it open. All three men looked up at you: Frankie’s scowl turned soft with a slight smile as he sat in one of the worn armchairs, Will’s face remained stoic as he stood next to him, but Benny’s... he looked mad. His face didn’t shift to a lighter look like it normally did when he saw you – it seemed to get angrier.

“Morning, baby girl.”, Frankie’s voice came out softer than either Will or Benny expected, Will especially turning to him and giving him a look. He stood up and walked towards you, pulling you to his side and pressing a kiss to your head.

He turned to Will and Benny, his voice returning to the timber they were used to. “She’s not working today... Benny, you’re going food shopping. Will, get him some money.”

Will nodded and Benny’s face pulled into a furious frown as he looked at the floor.

“And you.”, he said sternly. “You be a good girl and get Benny a grocery list together... I got a surprise for you later.”, Frankie mumbled softly into your hair as he pressed another kiss onto you.

His hand traveled down to your ass cheek and squeezed before he headed out the door, presumably to his office.

*****

Benny was actively ignoring and punishing you with his refusal to speak to you, let alone even look at you, from the moment Frankie left the room. Will had said he would have money for you once you got your grocery list together and left you alone with him, and that was the last time you’d felt the weight of his eyes, burrowing deeply into you and filled with judgement, anger, and disappointment.

The time you’d spent in the kitchen, scanning the cupboards to figure out what you needed was silent and awkward. He refused to meet your eyes and huffed and sighed as you continued to build the list. You handed the paper to him, and he ripped it out of your hand, giving you one final glare before he left the kitchen, aggressively stalking out of the room.

Benny grabbed the money from Will, telling him to ‘Save it!’ when Will tried to reason with his brother. The drive over, his knuckles were white from how hard he gripped the steering wheel, and his jaw was starting to ache from clenching his jaw. Once Benny had parked the car, his mind played through his anger at you. He’d told you that you didn’t have to, but you did it anyway. In his fury, he wouldn’t allow himself to think that this might be something you felt you had to do despite him assuring you that you didn’t, or worse, something you actually wanted. To him, you were being stupid, careless. You’d just fallen into this situation, and you didn’t have to do what the other girls before you had done, because you were smarter, you were stronger, you were fiercer, and kinder and braver and everything else that made it so hard for Benny to swallow that you’d allowed yourself to be sucked into Frankie’s orbit. He didn’t want you for himself, of that much he was certain, but he did want something better for you. He didn’t want you to be Frankie’s latest whore.

As he got out of the car, and as if on cue to add more insult to injury, a text came through from Frankie, asking Benny to get some pink nail polish for you. Benny’s fists clenched and he groaned, scowling as he went into the store.

He walked up and down the aisles with a scowl so deep on his face, no one dared approach him, everyone just getting out of his way. After he’d grabbed the last item on the list, he remembered the final request from Frankie and walked to the health and beauty section of the store. Scanning the displays, he found a pink bottle of Sally Hensen polish, in a shade called I Pink I Can. Despite how agitated and infuriated with you he was, he thought this would be a nice colour for you. A wave of sadness washed over him, but it quickly gave way to the anger and fury he felt, not allowing himself to let you off the hook so easily. He tossed the polish into the cart and went to the check out.

While you were left alone waiting for Benny to return, you decided to not let your mind wander into dark waters. To keep your mind occupied you make a quick batch of oatmeal raisin cookies for the guys. You recalled a conversation you had with Benny, and he’d let you know they were his favourites. You thought that maybe this could be what would break down whatever it was that he had against you and get him to open up; maybe you could have a friend again.

The cookies were cooling on the counter when Benny walked in all but shoved the bags of groceries at you. He then got out of the room quickly and flopped hard in one of the armchairs in the lounge. You took your time putting the food away, not sure if further silent treatment was waiting for you or something else, but you weren’t keen on finding out just yet.

After putting away the first bag, you grabbed a plate and a few cookies and brought them out, placing it on the coffee table in front of Benny. You said nothing and returned to the kitchen. Benny just glanced at cookies and went back to fuming.

You hummed quietly to yourself to fill the void Benny’s silence created while you emptied the rest of the bags. You weren’t trying to cause any further issues, but it didn’t stop your sweet voice from burrowing under Benny’s skin and festering. He finally snapped when he caught the sight of you looking at the bottle of pink nail polish, grinning with your bottom lip pulled between your teeth.

“Just... fuckin’ stop!”, he barked out before sitting forward on the couch, his face in his hands.

You stopped and looked at him through the bar counter opening to the lounge, your breathing caught in your throat. You watched as he stood up and stomped towards the door, menacingly glaring at you, leaving you once again alone in the room. You swallowed hard and looked over at the untouched plate of cookies on the table, and the horrible feeling you’d felt your first day here creeping back into the base of your skull and flooding your system with dread.

*****

After showering and readying yourself for Frankie’s ‘surprise’, including painting your fingernails and toenails with the colour Benny had bought, you got dressed in a short sundress and jean jacket. You had no idea what Frankie had planned, but you knew whatever it was, Will’s clear directions on how to appease Frankie were going to be followed to a T.

Benny’s attitude was weighing heavily on you, and you needed to get out of your head; you needed to find Frankie to make you feel something other than whatever void Benny’s anger had left in you. Slipping quietly out of the barracks, you made your way to his office. Luckily for you, you didn’t run into anyone enroute to the office. As you approached the door, you listened for voices, but heard no one. You knocked before opening the door, expecting the room to be empty, but you were met with Will’s cold blue eyes looking at you. He stood in front of the big bay window behind Frankie’s desk, his arms crossed, his shoulders and head turned to you.

“I’m looking for Frankie.”, you spoke timidly. You had no idea if the anti-you attitude that Benny had adopted was contagious, and treading lightly was your best bet moving forward.

“Not here, Honey.”, he grumbled, turning back to the window. You paused, then decided to head back to your room, but as you started to slip back through the door, Will’s voice came up again, his back still to you.

“You know… Benny’s just bein’ sore ‘bout you foolin’ around with Fish. He’ll get over it.”

“I… um… yeah. Okay.” Your brows furrowed, but you took this as Will’s invitation to come into the office.

You closed the door gently behind you and stepped slowly to the front of the desk. You waited for Will to give you further instructions or tell you more about Benny, but he remained silent, looking out over the water, seemingly lost in thought about something.

You’d been in this room almost every day that you’d been here in this building, but you’d never allowed yourself to look over the shelves that lined the walls leaving from the door to the window. You took advantage of the time Will was seemingly allotting you and walked to the shelf that had photographs on it. There were funny staged images, and some candid, a few looked like landscape shots, a few were of fishing and camping trips. You recognized most of the faces, and one you could guess was Tom, but there was a man that you couldn’t quite place. Dark hair, unruly curls poking out from under a baseball cap. He was thin, gaunt almost, and he was in nearly every photograph. You looked closer, focusing on him, thinking there was something about his eyes that seemed so familiar.

Will’s voice pulled you from your concentration with a jump.

“That’s Fish.”

You turned around and he was right behind you, looking at the same photograph you were and Will’s eyes were heavy with what seemed like remorse. He reached over you and picked up what looked like a group shot, all five men standing in a row, all looking like they were trying not to smile at something behind the camera. Who you now recognized as Frankie was on the end and his face was all sharp angles, his clothes looked like they were hanging off him; this was a far cry from the man who had been slowly encroaching your mind at every waking moment. Less than half the man at least.

“Oh my god… it is!”, you gasped. You leaned in and looked at another picture, one where he and Benny were standing together, shirtless, on what looked to be the end of a dock. You could count his ribs even with the photograph being grainy.

“What happened?”, you asked quietly, your eyes roving over the other pictures on the shelves.

“Fish had a ragin’ coke habit. Couldn’t shake the shit. Went to fuckin’ rehabs all over the place, come home then get right back into it. Start all over again. And we knew each time he did.”, he sighed.

“Coke habit? Jesus…” You shook your head. “How… how did you know?”

“He’d come back from rehab, 20 lbs. heavier, then when he got down to skin and bones again… we knew.”, Will said quietly. “He never got mean on coke… I knew other fuckers who got real nasty on the shit, but not Fish. His tell was his weight.”

He put the picture back and looked at you with a smirk. “The Fish you know now is a result of him gettin’ off the coke and findin’ a new vice… one no one’s gonna step in and tell him no to.”

“Oh…”, you nod. “Why did he finally stop?... the coke I mean…”

“Tom got wacked, and Frontiersmen needed a leader… Pope said he wanted Fish in charge, said that this would keep him off the coke, and it did. Said he was the best choice because of how he was a problem solver… and fuck, is Fish not the best of us to find a solution to every problem. But he can be easily persuaded… that’s why I think Pope really wanted him in the boss’s seat. Jokes on him though… Fish is a hell of a leader and scarier than fuck if he needs to be.” Will huffed a laugh and walked back to the desk, sitting on the edge of it, his arms still crossed.

“He can sus just about anything out… like a fuckin’ sixth sense…”, Will continued but in a quieter voice, then lowered his head. “Not proud of the situation I got you in, but it’ll keep him occupied while I try and find a solution for him… it’s one problem he can’t be involved with.”

“Who killed Tom?” Your voice was clear and ripped through him like the shrill, crisp sound of shattering glass.

He looked up at you, his eyes meeting yours, then quickly looked away. “Don’t know… we assume it was some rival group… that’s what Pope said anyways…Tom wasn’t no saint, but he sure as hell didn’t deserve what was done to him… I hope whoever did it knows they deserve to rot in hell.”

You looked at Will. The realization dawned on you that the problem he was trying to solve, the problem that sent him into your room filled with fear and terror, could very well be the same one that got Tom killed. You instantly felt your stomach drop as you watched a man who showed so little emotion be destroyed by the overwhelming love and dread he had for his friend.

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