#that's our way to heaven that we've yet to build

[dromaeotrash]

.

[thoughtlessthinkythoughts]

I think the key to understanding show!Aziraphale is in some lines that are in the book but not the show. Because these lines represent a place that our show Aziraphale hasn't hit yet.

Before I get into this, let me explain why I think things that aren't in the show can be so important to understanding where the show will go.

For another example, let's look at the ending of the book/s1. In the book, Adam is not impressed with Aziraphale and Crowley. There is no pep talk. He actually has a pretty stern message to them about "not messing people around."

A lot of s2 might not have worked the same way if they had gotten that message. It would have cut off room for growth. The whole plotline with Nina and Maggie for one would have been much less likely. So by holding off the stop messing with people message to the end of s2 (and then only giving it to Crowley), it provides more room for the characters to change at a pace befitting a multi-season show.

So what else do I think will end up working this way?

Well, there's a scene I love in the book that hasn't made it into the show yet. It happens after Aziraphale is discorporated. In the show, he goes to heaven, then to Madame Tracy. In the book, he bounces around possible hosts first, including a televangelist. The televangelist is going on about the rapture and such, and Aziraphale cuts in with this:

"Well, nice try...only it won't be like that at all. Not really.

"I mean, you're right about the fire and war, all that. but that Rapture stuff well, if you could see them all in Heaven - serried ranks of them as far as the mind can follow and beyond, league after league of us, flaming swords, all that, well, what I'm trying to say is who has time to go round picking people out and popping them up in the air to sneer at the people dying of radiation sickness on the parched and burning earth below them? If that's your idea of a morally acceptable time, I might add.

"And as for that stuff about Heaven inevitably winning...Well, to be honest, if it were that cut and dried, there wouldn't be a Celestial War in the first place, would there? It's propaganda. Pure and simple. We've got no more than a fifty percent chance of coming out on top. You might as well send money to a Satanist hotline to cover your bets, although to be frank when the fire falls and the seas of blood rise you lot are all going to be civilian casualties either way. Between our war and your war, they're going to kill everyone and let God sort it out-right?

"Anyway, sorry to stand here wittering, I've just a quick question-where am I?"

Because even this more cynical version of Aziraphale is adorable, the scene ends with "Gosh," he said, "am I on television?"

We didn't get this in the show, but I can't help feeling that it might be in season 3, assuming we get a season 3. It might even fit in better there, assuming we are going with a "second coming" plot. In the show, Aziraphale hasn't reached this level of cynicism (yet). I can't picture s1 or s2 Aziraphale giving this speech. Sure, he's seen what a mess the archangels are, he was willing to go against heaven to stop them from starting the end of the world, but I'm pretty sure show Aziraphale still believes in the goodness of God if not the goodness of the way heaven is run. It makes sense that show Aziraphale sees heaven as a fixable mess, an organization that isn't living up to what it should be. Because the show is taking Aziraphale's struggle with morally complex situations and questioning God and making it a longer arc.

My guess it that, as his tenure as archangel is likely to go terribly and not give him any more answers (or at least not answers he likes), he will get to the point where he could give this speech in season 3. My guess is that he's likely to also end up in a horrendous mental state once he reaches these conclusions (a perfect opportunity for some hurt/comfort). He's likely to build himself back up after that, but with a clearer look at the world.

End conclusion: if you are telling a longer story, sometimes you need to hold some things back to give your characters room to grow. So, it isn't a sign something is wrong with a story when partway through a character hasn't hit upon an obvious point.

"

[foone]

We build bases on the moon. Colonize the planets of the gas giants, terraform Mars and Venus, build orbital habitats around everything with enough gravity to hold it up. We invent FTL, and send ships named after dreams to every star we have cataloged. We have rulebooks and plans and endless ideas of what we do when finally we meet another spacefairing race, but it never happens. We don't hail any vulcan cruisers above the skies of Epsilon Eridani and get in no laser battles with a star destroyer in the scarlet light of Wolf 359. No one responds to our endless messages sent to the heavens.

Life? We find that everywhere. If a rock is big enough to hold onto enough atmosphere, we find something growing there. Maybe just a moss or some protokarotic slime, but there'll be something growing there. We spend centuries cataloging the flora and fauna (and everything in between) of a million stars, and never meet anyone who can say hello back.

Not yet at least. In the unending sunset of the Mu Herculis system there's the Peterson's Mermaids who are just developing language and starting on metallurgy. The vampires of Fomalhaut b have begun to write down numbers, and we expect them to have a full language sometime within the next hundred thousand years. There's no animal life on Gliese 499 d, but we have reason to suspect the clonal organism inhabiting most of the northern forest is verging on sapience. And we don't even have time to get into the theory that 55 Cancri B (the red dwarf orbiting the star Copernicus) is a living being in it's own right.

There's plenty of life to study. Lots to learn. But we never meet anyone we can greet in friendship, and there's no star gods out here in the black. We've looked everywhere.

Humanity takes decades to come to terms with the reality of the situation. But we do, of course. We can't give up now.

We searched endlessly for the ancient aliens with all the answers, who built hyperspace portal networks before our sun even burnt, and couldn't find them. We settled for locating our brothers and sisters amongst the stars, another race that had fought their way up from the trees and into the stars, and couldn't find them either.

We always dreamed of finding a parent we could look up to, or a sibling we could share the sky with. They weren't there.

Humanity settles into their role. It wasn't what we hoped for, but we'll be the big brother/big sister to the life of the universe. Not the parent, no. We didn't create them, and we don't control them, but we'll protect them. We'll help them when they fall, and let them make their own mistakes when they need to. But we're here to be the role model and the helper and the partner in crime, the one we wanted but never had.

We keep searching, of course. And our observers on a thousand planets report that there are hints of an ancient race, older than writing, mentioned in the myths of endless cultures. Gods from the skies who stopped the flood, who ended the plague, who taught them to plant a new crop, who stopped the war just as the bombs began to fall, and who led them to a new land when the star began to flare.

We investigate these rumors and myths and stories, just in case we missed the Ancients we always wanted to find. But at the heart of these stories, there's always a description of the helpers: bipedal, two arms, two eyes, no fur, no wings. And if the species has developed art and writing, there'll often be a drawing of a figure, standing alongside a local god or great leader, and nearby the legend will read "humans".

Art historians and religious studies scholars are amused at how often they give us halos. Someone even suggests redesigning our force-suit geometry to reinforce the impression, but cooler heads prevail. We're not doing this for praise or worship. We're doing this because no one could do it for us.

Millenia later after we've been joined among the stars by our sibling races, a mermaid and a vampire are idly chatting while they wait for their turn through the portal network around Fornax A. "What drove the humans to do all this? Why did they take it upon themselves to search every corner of the universe and decide to protect and shelter and guide the many younger races of the stars?". The mermaid shrugs, which is hard to do without shoulders. "I think they just wanted friends."

The vampire looks out the observation window, at the thousands of ships from hundreds of spacefairing races, waiting in line or jumping through phase gates to the other side of the cosmos. "Well, they've got them now."

There's a beep from a console, and a warning light activates as the ship accelerates towards a shimmering gate. Our children play among the stars, without fear of the dark. There's no monsters there, we checked. There's only us.

[george-weasleys-girl]

North Star Series

The Honeymoon

(NSFW) 18+only

Warnings: pure smut, a few curse words

~•~

Y/N clenched around her husband's cock, the vast array of food forgotten. She'd been teasing him for the better part of an hour, sliding up and down his dick at an excruciatingly slow pace until they both were trembling with need. George gazed at her through the heavy haze of pleasure surging through him. He was in heaven, and Y/N looked like an absolute angel, with her head thrown back and her moans mixing with his. The chair beneath them creaked as she quickened her pace. George ignored it. They were so close, his balls tightening in tandem with her pussy. "Cum with me, baby," he grunted, pressing his thumb to her clit.

"Fuck yes, George!" She cried out, pulsing around him just as his own ecstasy overtook him, groaning her name as he filled her to the brim.

Y/N fell forward onto him, both of them still shaking from the aftershocks when the chair gave way with a loud crack, dumping them into a heap on the floor, both of them laughing even as they still worked to find their breath.

"Hey, we've hit a new milestone in our relationship," George chuckled. "Breaking a piece of furniture while fucking each other's brains out." Then he pushed himself up and offered a hand to his wife. "I think this might be a sign that we should take a wee break before round two."

Y/N grinned and took his hand. "Agreed."

~•~

George kissed his way down Y/N's body. With a soft sigh, she spread her legs, welcoming his mouth. The scent of their mingled pleasure from earlier still lingered, and the image of her face, flush with ecstasy while she rode him, flickered across mind. All he wanted now was to see that look on her beautiful face again. He pushed the covers back so he could watch her every move and then proceeded to work his magic.

The cutest little gasp escaped her lips as his tongue probed inside her warmth. "Fuck, Georgie, that feels so good," she praised, letting her head fall back.

He grinned up at her. "Keep your eyes on me, darling," he said and took it up a notch, moving to kitten-lick her sensitive nub. She raised her hips up pressing her wet cunt against his face. He sucked on her clit, drawing the prettiest moans out of her as he slid two fingers inside her heat. Y/N clenched around him. "God, you're so fucking good at this," she gasped. The words went straight to his cock, droplets of precum wetting the sheets as he pressed his throbbing erection into the mattress, sending a tremor of pleasure down his spine.

George loved her like this. A quivering, moaning mess completely at his mercy. He knew what each curl of his fingers and each flick of his tongue would do to her. Every movement. Every sound. George knew them all by heart. And yet, knowing them didn't make it any less exhilarating or arousing. Quite the opposite, in fact. He thrust his hips slowly, reveling in the sensations that made him moan uncontrollably into her pussy.

"I'm so close, Georgie," Y/N panted, her legs shaking as the walls of her cunt pulsed around his fingers. His balls throbbed in response, and he could feel the pressure building. For a brief moment he considered replacing his fingers with his cock and cumming inside her, but before he could finish the thought it was too late. His whole body convulsed and wave after wave of pleasure pulsed through him as he spurted his release onto the silken bedsheets. Y/N followed close behind, toes curling with an earth-shattering moan that sent one last surge of ecstasy through George before he collapsed on her stomach.

"Wow... " Y/N sighed once she could form words again. "That was fucking amazing. I think I left the stratosphere for a few seconds."

George chuckled and kissed her belly. "I think I went with you."

Y/N looked down at him and grinned affectionately. "Did you...?"

"Yep," he returned her grin.

"Well, it wasn't the first time," she giggled.

"And it won't be the last either," he waggled his eyebrows.

~•~

@milivanili99 @slytherclaw1978 @quackitysdrugdealer @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @fancy-pantaloons @samberriejams @totalwitch2 @aslanvez @mrsgweasley @morally-grey-obsessed @asuperconfusedgirl @hmisa11 @superduckmilkshake @junerprsh @wolfkill16 @kaysau2510 @planetkt @thankyouforanonymity @thatonepersonwhocantwrite @smallsweetvanillabean @themaraudersslut @hanne-montana @greenapplegrass @yoursarahg @marvelgirlstories @ceehance @whotfskai

[giantmushyfriend]

Discussing Crowley's S3 (potential) relationships

As soon as season 3 got confirmed, or even since Neil told us that one way or another he would tell its story, we as a community have wondered about how Crowley will interact with the different characters as he and Aziraphale attempt to once again prevent the end of the world, and finally resolve the barricade that has stopped them from actually talking to each other, which will allow them to eventually be what they are meant to be: together. While we know that Aziraphale and Crowley will end up together in a cottage in the South Downs, presumably in a garden, we don't know how we are going to get there. All we know of season three yet, especially since scripts are still being written as per Neil's Tumblr, is that Aziraphale and Crowley are currently not talking, that they will save the world and end up together. That's it, and that's all we're going to know for a very long time since these shows take a very long time to produce to the level of quality that we've come to expect from Neil and the team. That being said, we know that major character growth is going to happen for both of our protagonists. For Aziraphale, it seems safe to assume that he's going to learn how to be more independent and overcome his issues with his faith, which is currently centered in the institution of Heaven. Aziraphale's growth is going to be within his predetermined beliefs of what things should be vs what things actually are. Heaven should be inherently good, but it's not. Aziraphale should have no issues with the plans Heaven and Hell have concocted, but he does. That's what we can assume will push Aziraphale's story and character within the last season, and it's assumably going to be by himself. There aren't a lot of people who are going to be around him to help him in his journey outside of Muriel and eventually Crowley as they rebuild their relationship. Crowley, on the other hand, looks like his story will be primarily based on him building relationships with others and moving past his trauma. This seemingly will be through Muriel, Nina, Maggie, and then eventually Aziraphale. To best understand how these potential relationships, their growths, and even their conflicts will help Crowley grow as a character, it's best to look at them one at a time.

Let's start with Nina, the character that, on the surface level, mirrors Crowley. Nina and Crowley are parallels in terms of their personality. It's straightforward to compare the two of them and how they carry themselves. Both are protective and strong-minded and despite being tough on the outside, they have a lot of unresolved issues. It wouldn't be hard to believe that Crowley sees aspects of himself in Nina and vice versa. However, when we dig deeper, we see that Nina more or less mirrors Aziraphale in terms of her relationship with her abusive ex-partner. Like Aziraphale, Nina made excuses for how her ex-partner was treating her, often being manipulated into thinking she was the problem in the relationship. Nina knows what Aziraphale is going through and also knows how to put it in terms that Crowley will understand. It wouldn't be surprising sometime next season to see Nina talk about her experiences in her past relationship in a way that helps Crowley understand not only her past but also Aziraphale's. One of the largest roadblocks within Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship is that Crowley doesn't understand the relationship that Aziraphale has with Heaven because it's so different from his own. Crowley, since his fall, knows that Heaven is toxic. They can punish those who don't deserve it, and they, as an institution, cause a lot of harm. He knows that, has witnessed it firsthand, and has recognized the systematic issues that are constructed within the framework. In modern terms, Crowley has seemingly deconstructed, despite the fact that he still holds faith in God. This is a large gap from where Aziraphale is in terms of his journey and relationship with these institutions, something that Crowley has a hard time comprehending. He doesn't understand what Aziraphale's relationship with Heaven is really like and thus doesn't see Aziraphale's actions through the lens of someone in a toxic relationship. Rather, based on his prior experiences, he believes that Aziraphale could never love him or choose him because he's a demon; he's fallen. To Crowley, Aziraphale rejected him for the same reasons why God and Heaven rejected him: he wasn't good enough. Nina's storyline matches well to help Crowley understand where Aziraphale is coming from and why he has acted the way he has, and it helps him make sense of their situation. I believe that Nina will help be the person who gets Crowley to a place where he can help navigate working with Aziraphale to save the world through a close-knit friendship that we've already seen the fandom begin to speculate about.

Another interesting dynamic I'm excited to see develop next season is Crowley and Maggie. Like Nina, Maggie, at first glance, appears to fulfill the role of Aziraphale's parallel as the kinder, more cheerful member of the duo. However, as many others have pointed out, she's a better parallel for Crowley in terms of her role in the plot. Maggie is deeply in love with Nina. Unlike her past partner, she cares for her profoundly and respects her. With Nina and Maggie, it's a partnership, not a hierarchy. And like Crowley, she waits as long as necessary until the person she loves is ready to begin that relationship. Unlike Nina, I don't necessarily think that Crowley and Maggie are going to be the best of friends. Maggie has a lot of traits that Crowley will probably see Aziraphale in, such as her kindness, her affection for specific things like records or books, and the odd quirks that she's expressed throughout the second season. Those aspects of Maggie will both be comforting to Crowley since they reflect traits his own best friend had/has, but they'll also be reminders of Aziraphale. The two won't be attached to the hip, but they'll have this mutual understanding. Through Maggie and her relationship with Nina, which may be established by the time season three starts, Crowley might see glimpses of what he and Aziraphale could have if they worked out their differences.

That being said, there could be room for conflict and resolution within their friendship. I wouldn't be surprised if we saw, at least once, Maggie trying to talk to Crowley about Aziraphale and him pushing her away, saying she knows nothing about them or him. It wouldn't be unlikely to see him make some snarky remark about how he got abandoned the last time he followed her advice and tried talking. And it wouldn't be unlikely for this to lead to either Maggie or Nina confronting Crowley about how he reacts to things, inherently pushing people away out of anger rather than communicating, and how that probably drove Aziraphale away- most likely in the heat of the argument. While this may hurt Crowley at the moment, it could act as a springboard for some self-reflection needed for his growth and to complete his arch.

Muriel is also another character who may, and most certainly will, have a complex relationship with Crowley. I've heard a lot of people discuss these points, so they won't be new, but Crowley will be initially hostile towards the young angel before eventually warming up to them. Muriel will initially stand as a reminder of what happened between Aziraphale and Crowley. Crowley will look at Muriel, at them running Aziraphale's bookshop, and be instantly reminded of why Aziraphale isn't there. At least initially, their mere existence will be a reminder of Aziraphale's absence, and he will be furious at them for it. He will most likely use them to grieve the relationship that he lost, the one that got away. But I think there will be a couple of ways that Muriel helps Crowley along his journey. Firstly, in combination with Nina, Muriel will help Crowley understand where Aziraphale was coming from, even if his actions were misdirected. I think they will do this by displaying their newfound love and admiration for the world around them. As many have pointed out when discussing this potential plot point, this is Muriel's first time on Earth, and they are mesmerized by everything they see. They will be amazed by everything around them, even the ugly parts, and probably filled with questions about how the world works. This will resonate with Crowley, perhaps showing him aspects of who he used to be and helping him remember what this has all been for in the first place. Muriel will help him remember why he and Azirapahle saved the world in the first place and potentially give him the drive to save it again. Initially, like Nina and Maggie, I think Muriel will push Crowley and Aziraphale back together. Muriel is the only connecting point between Aziraphale and Crowley at this point, primarily because of their new role as the bookshop keeper. Through their role as this bridge for the two of them, Muriel will get them to reflect on what they love about the world and their love for each other. I would bet that Muriel, at least once, asks Crowley about his feelings for Aziraphale or points it out like Nina did, and I think that will cause Crowley to spiral into readmitting to himself that he did love Aziraphale that he still does, even if he's angry at him.

Lastly, Aziraphale. We already know that the beginning of their reconciliation is going to be a literal shit show. I am still determining how or when these two will find their way back to each other, which is primarily why this section is so short, but I have a hunch that it will be a slow-burn-ish subplot throughout the season. They're both probably going to be angry at each other at the beginning, but then put aside their differences to save the world. No matter what, through the help of the other characters and their respective relationships with them, the two will slowly find their way back to each other. I think it's going to be a season full of them essentially talking to each other in the ways that couples in couples therapy talk to each other, but I also think it's going to be a season of them falling in love with each other and learning how to express that love within their new dynamic. I think after years apart, under these new circumstances, they will be reminded of what they love about each other and the place of salvation their relationship has been for them. They will fall back into their banter, bickering, and longing glances, but they will get it together at the end of it all.

[saderplate7]

keeping track of some songwriting progress

i try to write a song a month. here are some of my favorite lyrics from the 2024 songs per month so far.

january: "we're less of a sitcom, we're more of a tragedy our story, it lives on, but only in memory" —pass me a note (this one morphed into a good omens song as i wrote it)

february: "wait here for heaven or build hell instead schrödinger's addict is better off dead" —twin-sized coffin (i love this one.)

march: "show me a world where i know what's happening you don't wanna know why i feel the way i'm feeling inventing corners for the wheel" —joy ride (technically these lyrics came before this year but they're my favorite part of the song)

april: "where's my motivation that you gave me long ago dedicate my life to this, remember that i love it" —not today (i SUPER copped out on this one, it's like a minute long)

may: "you and i will be safe where you're following say goodbye to the damage we've been through i only exist for you" —are you having fun yet? (i played the stanley parable!)

june: "my standards are getting high there's a common thread that i can't deny i'll do what you recommend but what i begin will be bound to end" —common threads (my favorite one of the year, hands-down)

july: "unseen, unheard, unwanted and forgotten you think that i'm absurd, i think you're rotten" —the missing song from descendants (the title says it all, baby)

bonus: if you were into it, which i absolutely love and which is absolutely unfinished

[destiel-wings]

I've gathered some of my thoughts about The Winchesters season finale and here's why i think it gave me some peace

(yes, this does contain a destiel interpretation, too 💚💙)

Did i want to see Cas in it? Yes.

Was i disappointed that he wasn't? Actually, no (more on that later).

But I loved it. I was so stunned as I saw it and I felt like somehow it healed some of the wounds from the spn finale... but i couldn't quite understand why.

Here's why.

We basically watched Supernatural. Jensen reopened the finale and went further with it. What we saw in The Winchesters felt like a continuation of 15x20, even if it technically happened in between the last two scenes of the finale. But we got Bobby, we got Jack. They all actually talked, in a way that felt alive and real. Jack broke his rule of no interfering, showing that he still cared for Dean (just like he had broken his own rule off screen by saving Cas from the Empty). The Winchesters wasn't a prequel, but a sequel.

Dean got his own story, got to make something for himself (instead of just waiting for Sam on a bridge), and it's something that he wanted to do. He went back to look for hope and love, for a version of his parents where they could have a real chance.

We learn love (or we don't) and how to be in a happy relationship as kids by watching our parents, and Dean was doomed that way. He never had that example, to learn how to build a relationship and let himself be loved. He never learned that. So when he gets to heaven and he has the chance, before getting on that bridge, before meeting up with his family, with Sam... and yes, with Cas (even if we haven't seen him yet), he just needs a freaking minute. He needs a little time to himself. To reconnect. To understand. To reflect on love and what it means to love and be loved.

So he does what any fond child would do... he looks up at his parents. Only his parents that are right there in heaven didn't exactly have a happy ending (or even a happy middle), so he explores further, searching for a chance, a hope, a version of his own legacy where love was possible. Because if his parents can make it... so can he.

And we see all that through his own lenses (the weird use of the camera lenses with all those flares and glow resembles the aura of Dean's drive in heaven, thinking about it in retrospect).

screencaps of the glowy amber look and those camera flares, there's probably better examples but these are some of the best ones i could find

Dean's mission might have been the Akrida, but the reason he went looking, the real quest he was after, was hope. Hope for a happy ending. Hope for love, where said love was doomed from the start.

And it's not surprising that there were destiel parallels everywhere, because that was Dean's POV, and he's processing his own feelings. Which is something he needs to do before he sees Cas again.

And personally, I think Dean loves Cas back and he knew that before dying, but still, that doesn't mean that he's not afraid of messing it up. That he knows how to approach him, or face Cas, after all that's happened.

He may not even be doing all of this thinking consciously, but the Castiel subtext we've seen in The Winchesters, from a narrative POV, is Dean's.

We're seeing the parallels because he's seeing them, making them, it's his way of processing. Of seeing what he and Cas had, and what they could have. Looking for hope.

And, as he himself said before leaving again... i think he found it.

So i don't know how things are going to go on from here. I can't imagine how we could have Dean in a season two. I've been saying all along that The Winchesters might open the story for a SPN revival/s16, and i think it is perfectly possible that this might happen here.

The Winchesters might not have Dean anymore, becoming its own show (but still having lots of references and guest stars from Supernatural) and *as Jensen loves to say* when we get the revival, there will be the space to address Castiel's confession and give his character the importance that it needs.

It wouldn't have made sense to see Cas here in a little cameo, it wouldn't have been enough. But what we saw here, was the confirmation of Jensen reopening the finale, and his willingness to bring Dean back (as he's always stated), for whatever more he's allowed to do.

I love the way they handled it, we still got peace and hope (even if there were to be no s2), and i feel like we're all more confident that the bridge scene is not an ending, but a beginning of something more. Dean has said he's gonna go look for his family. That's not just Sam.

Of course he's gonna see Cas too. But i don't think any of us would've been satisfied to see him pop up randomly for a couple of minutes in TW, with little to no mention of what happened between them.

Also, i want to point out that this was supposed to be the midseason finale but they had to adapt it when they found out they didn't get a full season, we could've had much more (like more narrating voices as Jensen had teased) or even seeing more of Dean, instead of just seeing him in the pilot and the season finale. They even asked Misha to be there (and he refused for scheduling conflicts since he was busy filming Gotham Knights *but said he's absolutely willing to appear later*).

So i think there's still so much story to tell here and i am absolutely hopeful and trust that we will love it.

I think they did an amazing job in 13 episodes, and I can't wait to see what's next 💖

[bored-storyteller]

VERY LONG POST

It was supposed to be a little rant about Twisted Wonderland, it became a treatise (no, but almost):

So, I love the Diasomnia book. It's soooo good (also considering the type of game).

Lilia is enchanting me, Meleanor (or Malenoa) has enchanted me. She couldn't be more beautiful than this. We've seen her so little and yet in my opinion she is one of the most successful characters in Twisted Wonderland. She is the summary of what Twisted Wonderland should be, the dark side that reconciles with unconditional love. And with her being mother she introduces the concept which is the basis of Lilia and Silver (and also Malleus I presume), that is the concept of "true love". It's a blow to the heart, it's the key to development that can completely change things.

Ah, but then you know how to do things well.

And here comes my complaint: I start directly from the game first. I understand that Diasomnia is the main dorm and that Malleus (where are you Malleus?) is our front man. All right. But if they can do something like that now, then they could do at least half of this for the other characters too. Did they do it? Obviously not, or at least not for the most part. No, because if the other media have to come and explain to us the underlying reasons for the other Overblots then something is wrong. If to understand what the guys who are alongside us are doing and what they think I have to read the novel then yes, I get a little angry. Because they knows how to do things for heaven's sake.

Mind you, I'm not saying that Diasomnia can't have more screentime (also because they're giving us information on world building and who says anything), I'm simply talking about good writing and commitment to the characters that have been created. Also because there are already problems of opinion, if the writing is lascivious and incomprehensible, well, see you!

And here's the second point. I don't usually make posts like this, but this comes following a post I saw (I won't say how or where), where there was a clear devaluation of the other chapters and character issues in favor of Diasomnia. So, as much as can be forgivable addressing imaginary characters in a certain way (yes, they are all invented, they have neither merits nor demerits for being what they are, only the tragedy of being written badly in some cases), the treating some topics such as those of Riddle, or Azul or Jamil lightly or insensitively is questionable to say the least. And it can be offensive.

Just as I'm tired of hearing that Leona's problem is "jealousy". No, and even if the writing of the Savanaclaw arc (let alone the translation) doesn't help, no. He's not just jealous, just as Vil isn't just jealous. But I'm not here to do psychological analysis of characters that probably some wouldn't even understand.

You may not understand, yes, we have the right to not understand (especially, I repeat, given the weaknesses that are in the game). Fine, but it's our limit and we keep our head down and we keep quiet, or ask for things to be explained to us. There is no need to devalue, insult or mock the characters, because those characters are loved by someone, and there is a reason they are chosen. Revelation: no, if you like something you don't do it any good by devaluing the rest, but rather you throw that thing in the mud too. I'm not just talking about Twisted Wonderland, I'm also talking about your favorite author, your book or your anime character.

Guys, it's a matter of respect, you are not superior to anyone, and you are few. Come on, we are together, everyone waves their flag but high fives with those who are next to you.

This post has become very long, so I'm closing it, if anyone has something to dispute please, with all due respect.

Have a good day!

P.s. Sorry if I put this post here, I would like to put it on my personal blog but I haven't yet found the will to solve the access problems. I hope you forgive me.

[etraytin]

20th Anniversary Special!

I just took a poll that reminded me I didn't post anything yet about my big anniversary trip! With Kiddo away at camp and visiting his grandparents for three weeks, my husband and I got a chance to do something we've never done before, which is get away for a romantic anniversary weekend! It was extra special because this year marks our 20th anniversary! We met at 16, got engaged at 20 and married at 22, so I've already known him well over half my life and in two more years we'll have been married more years than we were not. We've been together so long that we've shaped each other, like two trees that started out saplings and grew up entwined. We also have all the same cultural references and inside jokes, which means that basically nobody else understands us when we really get going.

We saved up some money ahead of time for the trip (which was briefly threatened with the whole job loss thing, but saved in the nick of time by New Job, whew!) so we went extravagant (for us)! We got a hotel suite with a balcony for two nights, did a romantic sunset dinner cruise, and then a downtown food tour of different restaurants and fancy cooking places. (I have the _best_ balsamic vinegar now, it is the consistency of thin chocolate syrup and tastes like tangy heaven.) We ate at a French creperie and toured the silly local tourist spot, and went to two history museums on different local topics. This morning we finished off our weekend at the zoo, where we got to hold a bunch of squabbling budgies and remember the early years of our marriage when we had ten budgies of our own and a flight cage the size of a sofa to keep them in.

(When my husband proposed to me all those years ago, he did it in the parking lot of my dorm building after a nine hour drive from his school to mine. I'd come down to greet him with one of my budgies on my shoulder, and when I said yes and we embraced, she bit him on the nose. It was very romantic.)

Anyway, our hotel was decorated on a whole textiles theme, so it was all buttons and sewing machines and framed thread bobbins and such, so it was sort of like they made a hotel entirely based on my interests and it was pretty great. In the lobby they had these dress forms that they encouraged visitors to glue buttons onto to commemorate their visit. We decided to glue our buttons together and stick them to the form that way, like one big fancy button.

It was a pretty great weekend, absolutely one to remember. Scary things happened in the world during the weekend, and a lot of things are looking uncertain, but I'm just going to keep doing what we've been doing and hold tightly to my loved ones and friends, try to do good wherever I can, and hope that tomorrow things will be okay. I'm very, very lucky to have the husband that I do, someone who has been my best friend and partner all these years, and that's always something to celebrate.

[ineffableigh]

Timeline of Suspicious Events Brain Dump - PART 2

Ran out of characters. See previous post here! [linky]

We resume during Muriel's initial visit to the bookstore. They're having a nice look at a cupperty.

Crowley arrives in a bluster with all his plants - we've only seen him angrily say No about the Bentley and yet he seems to be going along with it anyway. He asks the important question: why not take the train? Why go by car? It's an eight hour drive each way! Train or even plane is WAY FASTER!

Crowley's the one that does the 'humans are weird/a few days' line for some bloody reason. Crowley what are you doin' man lol pick a better lie!

It feels Important that we see so many one on one moments with Nina, but not Maggie. Like we're building Nina as a character, but not really Maggie, y'know?

The show also really wants us to see how uncomfortable Nina is with discussing her love life at all, but everyone in the story just kind of blows past it.

"Dance Macabre" in the Bentley eh? A tone poem about Death calling the dead from their graves to dance for him? Like, I dunno, Gabriel says later in his Tempest line? A piece that quotes Dies Irae?

I love the musical conflict going on in the background once Crowley takes control of the Bentley's Vibes back lol.

Interesting that we have an entire moment to see that Beez is unhappy with the status quo in Hell, and the lack of recognition for all the work they seem to constantly have to do down there. Especially since we hear later they're very 'short staffed'.

Crowley moving seemingly random books from upstairs to downstairs, cosplaying a bookseller (ostensibly). Seems very chill about chatting gravity with Jimbriel, and we get our first Direct Fly Callout. Might be the second, not sure re: 'flyswats' when the archangels visited.

Pub imagery: Jesus raising Lazarus on one side, and the 'butcher' Dalrymple on the other side. Hmmm two sides of Heaven anyone?

It has to involve Aziraphale somehow because the Production Designer had that painting of Jesus done with the tomb opening being exactly like the 'eastern gate' of Eden in s01. Seems like a big effort to go to if not to draw parallels!

I find it interesting that Aziraphale a) seems super excited to hear about the 'Masons' b) there's a lodge next door to the pub, but c) we don't investigate that OR the person Gabriel was with. Y'know, the little shaggy haired demon with a bowler hat covered in flies? Normally would be quite conspicuous, yes? We know that Azi knows what Beez looks like from the end of S01.

Post-minisode we cut DIRECTLY to Aziraphale at the graveyard. What did he do between the pub and then? Did he walk there, drive there? Another huge gap to account for that's just swept under the rug.

Convenient that No Regerts and Friend are there, both being comically intense tough guys openly talking about Grindr lol. Just hanging out in the fog with no phone minutes left like ya do. Very convenient they were there, though I'm not sure what the advantage of that phone call even was. It's so strange a scene across the board that it feels like something is missing.

Back in town, Maggie is chasing Nina to talk about getting stuck in the cafe. I don't know what it is about their talks but to me they feel strange, or at least Maggie's side does. Might just be a by-product of us not seeing Nina 'acting like it's Maggie's fault' but it all feels very out of the blue, y'know? Always when Nina's busy working and can't really escape.

"I'm not your type." "You have no idea." Maggie SHE HAS A PARTNER AND SHE JUST SAID THE PARTNER SUSPECTS CHEATING, NOW IS NOT THE TIME LOL. See what I mean about Weird Vibes though?

Sudden Tempest Prediction from Gabriel. Very weird that he has these moments, either by forcing himself or these triggers. Do you have to be Empty to channel God?

Multitude of Shax Visions - this sequence seems odd to me. We've seen Shax impersonate a human once, yes, but this back to back thing seems unusually competent for her. I do wonder if we're getting a Crowley's Very Stressed Perspective thing going on here. Poor lad sure is stressed.

I was wondering how Shax figured out where Aziraphale was, but I bet she probably just tried to teleport to the Bentley like most demons seem to when Crowley was in it, but probably got punted outside by the Invitation Only magic. Or something.

The interaction with Shax here is really weird, though. It seems purely designed to freak Aziraphale out rather than actually get information. She says now she knows Gabriel is in the bookshop, but nothing about the discussion actually pointed to it any more than she would have known beforehand.

Shax then goes on to tell Beez that Gabriel is in the bookshop. Why she's so confident, I still don't really know, like I said above. All she knows is both the Husbands are being obfuscating dorks, but maybe that's enough.

Also like, Beez, you maybe should have just. Gone to the bookshop? Instead of attacking it? When you know Hell is short staffed? This is a Weird Plot Point too, if Beez just wants Gabriel. Why go straight to war?

As they're bringing Crowley's plants back to the car I hear glass shattering??? What's up with that??

Azi you dingle why are you hiding the Shax visit from Crowley. They really DON'T talk and for no good reason.

Next Instalment: [Linky]

[gwenbrightly]

(Re) Building the Future Chapter 4

Her entire body hurts, but at the same time she's floating. Weightless. Everything feels so far away. So muted. Her mouth feels cottony and there's a nasty aftertaste of rotten lavender mixed with lemon, along with a slight metallic tang. She feels like puking. Is this what dying feels like?

Dying. Cassie has never really thought that much about death before. Not even when her mom died. Though that was probably because she was too little to really understand things, back then.

But holy heck. The pain is intense. She hurts in places she didn't even know existed. On a pain scale of paper cut to mauled by a bear, she's giving this experience a solid 12/10.

If Cassie is dying, this is probably a good time to regret not leaving a note for anyone to find. Her dad won't know where to look for her. He'll be so worried when he gets back from his trip. So heartbroken when she never comes home. There'll be no more hugs. No more cheesy horror movie nights where they pick apart the horrible special effects and cringy writing. No more Cassie.

Oh, well. At least when she's done dying the pain will stop. Hopefully. Her… Her… Those human spaghetti thingies that allow you to feel pain? … Oh, right. Nerves. That's what they're called. Her nerves are on fire.

She longingly waits to be swept into the sweet oblivion of death, but her body seems to be taking its sweet time with that whole thing. After what feels like hours of agonized waiting, Cassie slowly cracks open one eye, then the other, blinking back tears from the painful blurriness of doing so. Maybe she's already dead and she needs to see heaven in order to accept reality? But no. Unless heaven looks like the inside of the Pizzaplex's Daycare, Cassie hasn't died (yet). Not that being in the daycare makes a lot of sense when the last thing she remembers is falling deep, deep below the sinkhole in Roxy Raceway. So maybe she's hallucinating to make herself feel better about being on the edge of death. Or something.

"Oh, good. I think she's waking up," Cassie hears a voice say. There's more, but she can't quite focus on any of it. Everything is still so foggy. She squints up at the source of the voice, trying to identify it. Milky white eyes come into focus. Cassie screams as everything goes black again.

"Get away from me, you monster!"

—-----

"Vanessaaaa!" Gregory calls, banging loudly on her bedroom door. Cassie has disappeared into the sinkhole and he and Freddy could really use some backup. When Vanessa doesn't immediately reply, he rattles it again and threatens to find his lockpicking kit.

"We've been over this before," an indignant Vanessa finally calls from the other side of the door, "You don't disturb me during Me Time and I don't judge your ability to turn video games into a contact sport or question your choices when you impersonate famous Metubers online."

"I knowwww, but this is an emergency!" Gregory insists, choosing to ignore the comments about his semi-legal internet habits.

"The last time you said that, you and Freddy had nearly succeeded in setting fire to our microwave," Vanessa points out. She sounds tired. Her latest therapy session must have been draining.

"We just wanted to see how many grapes we could explode at once," Gregory mumbles,"but forget about that for now. This is a way bigger emergency than that!"

Vanessa finally cracks her door open. She makes that 'I don't believe a word you're saying' face she's gotten so good at lately. The one with only one eyebrow raised - how does she do that, anyway?

"Uh huh," she says in a tone that matches her facial expression perfectly. How can he get her to listen?

Deciding there's no time to lose arguing with her, Gregory grabs Vanessa's arms and starts to drag her down the hallway as he frantically tries to explain the last few hours of Cassie getting herself into a buttload of trouble.

"Gregory, what the heck?" Vanessa starts to protest, but Gregory keeps bulldozing through his story.

"I… um… Might have hacked into the Pizzaplex's security program awhile back… And today while me and Freddy were playing Fazcraft, I got an alert. And when we checked the feed, somebody - a friend of mine - had gotten into the Pizzaplex and someone who sounded like me - butwasn'tmeIswear!"

"Okay, you need to slow down and breath. I can barely understand you," Vanessa cuts in, worried now. She plants her feet to prevent Gregory from dragging her any further. He tugs on her to no avail. Vanessa isn't going anywhere.

Gregory reluctantly gasps in a fresh breath of air.

"My friend is at the Pizzaplex and somebody talked her into deactivating the security nodes," he says more clearly, "Got it?"

Vanessa nods.

"Whoever it was - maybe that… Thing below the pizza? Which would be really bad if it was that." Gregory and Vanessa share a knowing look, "Got her to deactivate all the security nodes and now she's down under the sinkhole! Freddy and I tried to stop her but we couldn't and now she's all alone down there and we have to help her NOW!"

Vanessa says something that would normally prompt Gregory to demand she added a significant amount of money to their swear jar. He, however, decides that the situation will probably call for a great deal of swearing before all is said and done. Who is he to stand in the way of progress?

“So, uh,” Vanessa begins after a moment of awkward silence, “Now that I've had a chance to process all of… that… Have you ever wanted to hack into Freddy's restricted files?”

“Have I ever,” Gregory replies, stepping into the living room where Freddy is staring hopelessly at the monitor. “But how is that gonna help Cassie? It's not like hacking Freddy will turn him into some epic ninja bot or anything.”

Vanessa draws up a chair next to Gregory and Freddy.

“All of the animatronics are programmed with maps of all areas within the pizzplex grounds, from the VIP areas to the parking lot. Including the restricted ones, the ones no one is supposed to know about.”

“Why don't I have any knowledge of this?” Freddy questions. Vanessa looks uncomfortable for a moment.

“Let's just say the map program for these areas is only triggered once you hit a certain point. It's designed to make you forget the exact details once you've returned to the main pizzplex. For… Security purposes.”

“I… See.”

“Erm. Anyway, I was thinking we could use the maps to find your friend and get her out of there before something bad happens,” Vanessa explains.

“Okay if we poke around in your head a bit?” Gregory asks Freddy. Using the maps seems like their best shot. If they can get through to Cassie, that is.

“I suppose so. Just be careful not to cross too many wires or send me into cowboy mode again,” the bear relents. It's not like he has a choice, really. But he does so hate it when people mess with his programming.

“Freddy! Now is so not the time!” Gregory isn't proud of some of the places his curiosity has taken him. Vanessa clears her throat, interrupting their rabbit trail of distraction before it can continue.

“Focus, you two. Now, once we get access to Freddy's maps, we'll need a way to contact Cassie. Any ideas?”

The trio is silent for a time. Hacking deactivated bots didn't seem to be working earlier. There are no intercoms in the sinkhole. Only…

“Wait! I got it,”Gregory jumps up, “Cassie had one of those Fazbear Entertainment walkie talkies with her. I think I still have one in my room. We just need to find the right frequency!”

“You go get that while I get Freddy hooked up,” Vanessa instructs. With the speed at which he takes off, she is suddenly reminded why it was so difficult to catch Gregory at the pizzplex.

It doesn't take Gregory long to dig through the box of ‘spy equipment’ located at the back of his closet. He retrieves the walkie talkie and whacks it a few times to ensure that the (finicky) batteries are jammed in all the way. Satisfied with his work, he returns to the others. The first channel they try manages to get a response from the twins a few houses down, who are playing capture the flag. The second channel somehow connects them with all the police car radios within a 50 mile radius? Fazbear Entertainment probably needs to do something about that. Not that they care enough to do so. It would be a fascinating development for Gregory if there weren't more pressing matters. (He'll have to revisit this later).

The third channel is static. So much static. They're about to move on to channel number 4 when someone on the other end asks, “Gregory? Is that really you? I mean REALLY you?”

Cassie. She's not dead! (yet)

No one is surprised by her question. She's clearly had a run in with It. Gregory does his best to explain while the others jump into action. They move quickly, overriding the programming that usually blocks Freddy's maps as Cassie races through tunnel after tunnel. Vanessa and Freddy relay as many details as they can to Gregory, who practically shouts into the walkie talkie. Occasionally, they can hear It running in the distance, trying to catch up to Cassie. Thunk! Crash!

“Go right! Go right!”

“OK. Tell her there should be an elevator just up ahead,” Vanessa finally announces after what feels like hours of navigation.

“Almost there!” Gregory tells Cassie. She's so close to being safe. So close. They hear the elevator doors grind open and the sound of Cassie stepping inside.

“We did it!” Gregory screams, relieved. He hugs Freddie (who doesn't seem to mind) and Vanessa (who is more than a little surprised). Figuring Cassie probably needs a little more context for whatever horrors she's just experienced, Gregory begins to tell her what little he knows about It. But then… He hears another voice on the walkie talkie. A voice that sounds exactly like him. And a sinking feeling fills his very soul. It has something truly awful planned for Cassie. Gregory just knows it.

It's in this moment that Gregory truly learns what it means to be powerless. Never in his life has he been so totally unable to do anything to affect his circumstances. There's always an option. Running away, biting someone, simply using Google. Even when he himself was at the Pizzaplex, there was always something he could do to save himself. But this time… No matter what he does… No matter how many buttons he mashes trying to take charge of the elevator's controls… There is nothing he can do to stop the elevator's plummet into parts unknown as he listens to Cassie's screams.

[blindrapture]

MONDAY JULY 25TH, 2011 (Avoidance)

8:32 AM I don't want to get up today

8:35 AM Donnie's up. Hey Donnie, can we have a look further into the city today? Just you and me. "Sure. Uh.. anything in mind?" There'll be, like, a City Hall of some sort, right? Maybe we'll benefit from trying to talk to the 'other side.' The people in power here. "Mr. Diplomacy, over here. What if there's Fears there? Like, dangerous ones." Then we turn and leave? "And have them follow us here." Well, we're not gonna know unless we try. And, honestly, I… "...yeah?" ...I just. Want a change from the RAF for a bit. "Aww, did something happen yesterday? Did you get in an argument?" No. Maybe I'm.. partied out? <:D ...she patted my head. .w. "We can have a look around. Meet some new people." kissss Donnie, you're an angel, and it never feels right to leave your side. "Awwww!"

8:50 AM We had breakfast. No Cody this time; he's still asleep. <.<;; But we did talk with Heaven, and she gave us directions to City Hall, the "People's Palace." And she wished me luck with finding Bones!

9:14 AM Short drive. San Francisco has good streets. I'm impressed. Man, look at that building! People's Palace, indeed. Majestic, grey, greek-like. Naked lady carving up at the top. "Probably a symbol of democracy or something." Yeah. America!

9:15 AM I'd expect there to be more people here. This city's, y'know, relatively safe. And people love to just mill about; it's one of our favorite pastimes. "Well, we've been seeing a lot of people who don't like the old authorities that much. Maybe the people who did left the city?" Then. Who are the RAF trying to fight? "The Fears." I dunno. Something feels off.

9:16 AM It's... deserted. Yet the lights are on. Someone must be in here. Hello? … HELLO? … that triggered a coughing fit from down this hall.

9:17 AM Little office. Big man. Gotta be in his 40s, 50s. "Hmph. You won't find much to steal in here." We're not looking to steal, sir! "You'd be the first, then. Even the scoundrels who used to work here were ripping the carpets up on their way out. And I trust that rabble by the park even less." donnie "The world's ending. People are gonna panic." "Quite." sigh "I just always liked to imagine we were a more virtuous nation than that. And I mean the whole nation, not California. We're a state, dammit. Nothing's going to change that." Yeah. ..uh. "Yes, who are you? Why did you come? To listen to me talk?" Maybe?? I'm.. Jordan. "I'm Donnie." I came here to learn a little more about.. the way the city is run? "I just came along; I'm good with whatever." "You came here to learn about civics? Huh." stroking his mustache "Maybe the youth isn't lost." Do you know why money is still a thing here? What's this Z currency? "That is still one of the most suspect things to happen in all this Rapture nonsense. The change happened overnight. "Some senior investors and advisors came to the Palace one night earlier this month, and I mean senior, some of the most respected in the nation. They stepped into the Mayor's office, unannounced, unaccompanied, and spent a heated hour shouting profanities, then swiftly left in silence with stormy faces. "Do you know what they had said? "'The dollar is gone.' "That's right. Just like that. It was a demand from 'higher up,' they said. Higher than Congress. Higher than the Senate. Higher than the Supreme Court. Higher than the Pentagon!" W. Who. Who was it from? O: "One of them." he pointed, sinisterly, for effect. donnie "The Fears?" "One of them." Surely some people tried using the dollar anyway, right? Even just for a little purchase. "Of course people tried! We were the first to, as this building was the first to hear of it. But another change happened on that same night: Shortly after the investors and advisors left, the red sky vanished, and that army began patrolling our skies." The Ants of the Sky…

"The ANTS. Yes. ANti-finance Territorial Sentries. They know what we are doing in here. Anyone who spends so much as a penny, on any transaction, is hunted down within minutes. Gunned down... where they stand…" now he's looking off into space. I'm. I'm sorry. You must have seen a lot of this. "My colleagues dared the gods. I would have joined them too, had I anything to buy that night. I didn't believe in the demand. But blood speaks louder than decree." What the fuck. What's the point of it? What kind of scheme makes this make sense? ..he's shaking his head. forehead on his hand. "What bothers me is.. the Mayor obviously knew. He had that talk with the advisors. He didn't tell anyone. He let the rumor spread that it was just a demand. He let his staff exchange money. He had to have known. Why didn't he talk to us? Why did he just let us find out?" ... >_< donnie "Then. Then the Z? Did that just.. arrive one day?" "Delivered in secure vans. Stolen, I have no doubt. If anyone knows where they came from, they haven't told me." ..donnie "I'm sorry. Thank you for sharing what must not have been easy to recall." "These storied walls deserve a witness. After all our nation has been through, these walls deserve that much." So you really believe in this place. "And what it means. I feel I owe it, as I didn't do my due diligence when the sky was... real." I understand. Do you want to be left alone? "Yes. I have much to do. Archival work is never done." Th.. thank you for your time.

9:29 AM back in the car. just sitting here. What the fuck was that. Was that real. "At least we know those Ants are dangerous." But why the fuck is this happening this way? That Ant stuff is something I'd expect from Xanadu. But he says a Fear is responsible? "They're Fears, babe. They're bad. Remember the Harlequin? Would this really be that out-of-place for her to do?" I don't know! In terms of severity, sure, she was horrible! In terms of ambition, she was a terrorist! But what's with all the blue sky business? Why Z? Is Z a Xanadu currency, or did the same Fear give it to Xanadu? ..she's rubbing my back. "It's a world of trauma out there now. It kinda already was." Everything just raises questions. All this gunning-down... I feel like my brain's gonna explode. Why are the RAF... what are they doing? Are they just doing a takeover? Are they walking into a trap, the same situation that that government ran into? It doesn't sound like any human actually runs things here. "Why don't we go back to the house and.. ask them? Talk it out. You like talking it out." Talk to Cody? "And Heaven. The leader." I... yeah, okay. We can try.

10:10 AM The house is empty. They'll be off doing their.. secret plans. hnnng. "Then we can go off and do our plans until they get back." Our plans? "I mean the Derek thing. I think it's time we tried really driving around the city. Maybe we'll find places where the graffiti is more common?" It's.. worth a shot.

2:35 PM We've been driving slow. Looking for graffiti. There's been a lot of markings, symbols, tags. Some memes we've seen before. Occasionally a person nearby, who we'd ask about Bones. No luck. Not a clue. We're stopping for lunch. We still have some beef jerky from the rabbit hole. We're gonna sit on a bench and eat.

2:42 PM Some bikers just sped by, roaring without mufflers. Huh. Hadn't seen that yet. I'd kinda been expecting bikers in all this. I wonder where they're going. Maybe we should get bikes too.

4:24 PM Alright. Finished our cruising. I mean, we weren't exactly thorough with it. We just went on a graffiti tour of the city, that's it. "I'm sorry, babe. We'll find him." Yeah. I know. I don't like this city.

4:39 PM When we got back to the house again, this time Tiger and about half a dozen of others from the Party House were gathered on the front steps, listening to Heaven talk from her door. We pulled up and got out of the car, and that's when we saw it: Hanging from a window of the RAF house, limbs tied with flag cord, Winston. With a nasty gash in his neck. It's the modus operandi of the Masked Massacrer, and Heaven corroborated that, as she saw a man in a Jesus Christ mask skulking around nearby and chased him off before noticing Winston herself. Dammit. I mean dammit. We just saved him.

4:45 PM We're all going back to the Party House for a wake.

5:10 PM Tiger couldn't stand it.

5:18 PM When it came time to play some of Winston's favorite songs in memorial, the first one to come on was "Solitude." Candlemass. Holy shit, that was... crushingly awkward. Not many people were willing to listen to it right now.

5:24 PM Someone brought out the alcohol. Heaven left. I think she'd normally frown upon underage drinking, but.

7:58 PM screams "FEAR AT THE DOOR!" oh jesus. another zombie? I'll fucking get it. hang on. head's swimming. I got this.

7:59 PM Holy crap! it's not a zombie!! it's fucking EAT! "Rael, we" shhh IT'S OKAY EVERYONE! I'M GONNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE! IT'S GONNA GET UGLY! I'M SORRY! c'mon c'mon

8:05 PM okay I think we're far enough away. and this is a good alleyway. none of them will come looking. but just in case, if they do, put me in a headlock. just in, y'know. just in case. "That is a strange plan. Is it just you this time?" Yeah. Donnie's.. I think she went home hours ago. I like your Camper. :) She has blue hair... "I see." I am drunk... I apologize... "Rael, if it makes you comfortable and focused, you may say what you like to me. But I have to talk to you." Holy shit. Please, please talk. I'm all ears. "Can I trust that you will take in what I have to say?" I'm writing it all down! So I will be reading it again in the morning. Or whenever I'm sober. "You... hm. You know by now not to decode the Ciphers." Yes! "This was a surprise to me as well. When I advised you to pursue the sixth Cipher earlier this month, I only knew what I had read in your journal. And I only know the reality now because I read your newer journals. I suspect I may have learned about this on my own had I been in regular conversation with the other Fears, but Rapture has taken up all of my concentration." You really want to stop it. "I do." I do too! If at all possible. For a human like me.

"But there is a complication in the Cipher matter. Someone else has heard about the Ciphers, and not the most up-to-date information. Someone else is going after the seventh Cipher." Someone. Someone else. This is bad, right? "Yes. This is something that must be prevented at any cost." Are you the one who told someone else about the Ciphers? "Not.. to my knowledge. It might be possible that the wrong Camper spoke at the wrong time, but when I talk to myself, I do not go over every detail." You talk to yourself? O: "Don't you?" Only all the time! "..I think I like you drunk. You're so easy to read." I don't think I like being drunk, though. Being drunk is nice when I'm still drinking, but then when I'm not drinking, it's one long ride to sobriety. So. Gotta stop someone from going for the big video game boss battle. Do we know who? "I believe so. I first noticed other people discussing the Cipher in Texas, and I followed the rumors as they spread westward. With birds, I traced their source to a group on motorcycles. They have entered this city, and so I cannot follow them so easily anymore, as suspicion of Fears is greater here. Speaking candidly, I was taking a risk coming to see you at all." Aww, you risked for me.… "I risked for the world, Rael. You're my human emissary in this. You can go where Camper can't." I'm your emissary…

"I need you to find these motorcyclists and stop them. Or lead them out of the city where I can act unobstructed." Got it. I can do that. I can do one or the other. "You will have to act fast; it is not safe to stay in the city for much longer. The Archangel is amassing the undead, and a horde of them will hit in a few days." The Archangel... that's the gas mask one. The zombies. A horde? A few days… Y'know, the RAF have something planned for Wednesday. I don't know what it is, but they're working hard at it. "...Anonymous." Yeah. RAF are Anonymous. "Rael, Anonymous is allied with the Archangel." .....what. 'allied with' like, they're neutral towards each other? "They are working for him, delivering his will." How do you. How do you know? "My birds have seen. That adult woman you are staying with leaves the house every day, and her first stop is always to the same construction site, where Death meets her for updates on their plan, not unlike you and me right now." This is huge. This is.. sobering. "I am glad you are returning to your senses. I'll understand if you have trouble believing my information." No, I.. I didn't like the vibes here anyway. Too many things weren't adding up. Plus, I'm pretty sure Cody shot a kid in the head. "Which one is Cody?" The adult man. Do you follow him too? "Of course. But I don't think I should tell you what I have seen." You don't? "It concerns a subject that humans generally do not like to know." Worse than working with Death? Worse than shooting a kid? C'mon, EAT. Don't I do things for you? :C Aren't I your emissary? "And it concerns Donnie." ........read you loud and clear. o_e "I'm sorry." No, no, it's. I get it. On all counts. They have a history. And I don't think it was resolved. And, like. I've been really friendly with you, and there's no way she likes that. "I'm.. sorry." Please. EAT, you're. A friend. I shouldn't have asked. It's not your fault. "I don't want to impact you like this." I know. Unfortunately, this is.. the kind of thing that just happens, with feelings, sometimes. And definitely with drinking. Wow, that was a sloppy move on my part. "Feelings. I think I fear my feelings more than I fear the changes coming to our world." Heh. You and me, both.

8:13 PM "...at times like these, what should I do?" To achieve what? "Making you smile at me again." ..… hugggg

(Attached: "A Fear’s appearance, you know, is important. If we want humans to listen to us, we have to play up our powers, make ourselves look more important than we are. This is why the slender man wore a suit, why Death wears a gas mask, and why I keep my beard long and my book large– we want humans to fear us, we want to appear formidable. Salmacis, however, has a soft spot. It refuses to acknowledge any of them, but the apocalypse brings them out of her. And one of these soft spots of hers is the idea that humans will be more likely to assist if they feel they can trust her, rather than fear her. So over the course of the apocalypse, when it realized it needed to take some serious action to convince lots of people in so little time to help, it experimented with lots of different looks and approaches before it settled on giving her Camper blue hair– usually through wigs or hair-dyes– and overall blue colour schemes for clothing. And that all started here. Her first blue Camper was complete accident. It was just the nearest one to Jordan at the time. California, am I right?”)

[PREV LOG] [TABLE OF CONTENTS] [NEXT LOG]

[sun-undone]

I just watched the season 4 teaser and I neeed your thoughts

AHHH HELLO FRIEND it's been a fucking minute hasn't it???? obx is back after what feels like a billion years and for the first time in about that long i'm feeling the buzz for it again!!!

SO the teaser let's ramble about it for way too long

before getting into any of the specific content, i just wanna say that this teaser felt SO different from the s3 teaser. and that might sound like a bad thing at first cause imo the s3 teaser is the best piece of promo the obx team has ever put out, BUTTTT i think this teaser needed to have a different feel.

the writers and some of the actors (i think chase mainly) have repeatedly stated that this season goes back to basics a bit and refocuses on the characters and the bonds between them, and it truly feels like this teaser was doing exactly that. it wasn't really showing us many hints about the plot or massive action set pieces, it seemed much more interested in showing us our pogues. THAT is where the hype comes from with this teaser.

it might seem a bit lackluster and small compared to other teasers we've gotten, but i'm very happy with how they're already choosing to promo this season so far BECAUSE it feels more intimate reminiscent of s1 in that way.

i could absolutely eat my words about their intentions with this as promo continues, and i do think they'll still end up doing their usual bigger, action heavy plot heavy trailer, but as a first real teaser??? it's really making me trust their statements about refocusing the show.

MOVING ON

i mean. I MEAN

if this ISNT how the season starts i am going to be absolutely floored. i'm hoping so badly that it's an even more direct parallel to the opening scene of 1x01, with pope, kie, and jj down below ragging on john b to come help them build the dock or whatever. bonus points if john b drops the gold he's holding and almost breaks jj's foot or something. like i want as dead on of a parallel as humanly possible pates if you're gonna go for it, fucking GO FOR IT

i'm very curious as to how much of the time jump is gonna be exposited via montage and john b narration. i assume a lot of the building of the bunkhouse and dock and fixing up jj's house (which is kind of a shame cause how emotional must that have been for him????? but it's fine it's just RIPE for fanfic that way). but according to bts there's at least one scene that was filmed from the in between that might be an actual scene rather than montage (i won't say in case people don't want spoilers but it involves jiara). or maybe that's part of the montage too, we truly have no clue at this point. i'm just so stoked to see these new sets!!!! i'll forever miss the chateau like my heart actually splinters every time i think about it but the pogues having a new home base on jj's land is something really special too.

core 4 scuba mission as yet another parallel to s1 like are we in heaven??? and jiara are the ones that actually dive???????? jj reassuring her beforehand????????????? john b and pope teasing them???? potential jiara cheek kiss?????? it doesn't get better than this

oh actually no it does

LOOK AT HER SMILE AND YOU CAN TELL JJ IS CHEESING JUST AS HARD TOO LIKE HELLO

also jarah b watching from the dock house like proud parents I KNOW THATS RIGHT

we have a fair amount of bts about this so i'm not gonna say too much but john b looks PISSED. and i'm right there with him but hey at least we'll get hot jj bike stuff?? rivalry with rafe (and maybe topper too cause we just can't have nice things) and worried kie having to watch from the sidelines??? it might not all be bad!!!! i'm already pretty sure i'm gonna hate this plot point so i'm trying to get the anger out now so i'll be all out of it by october

IS THIS A POGUE SURFING SCENE MAYHAPS

i swear to god if this ends up being a random extra i will lose my shit

there is no screenshot of this that doesn't look absolutely horrid but that doesn't matter WHAT MATTERS IS THAT JJ FINALLY GETS TO PUNCH RAFE. they fucking heard our prayers i cannot believe it. i REALLY hope this is juicy as hell and leads into a full on fight that the pogues have to try to break up (i would've liked it even better if they had a truly one on one fight with no one else around so we could see how evenly matched they undoubtedly are but whatever whatever this could be super dramatic and fun in different ways too).

also double points if he's defending sarah and/or kie in some way. double double points if this tension has been building for the entire season up until this point cause i've been saying for YEARS that jj and rafe could have such an interesting dynamic but they barely have ANY scenes together. i am desperate and begging and this gives me so much hope oh my GOD also if you saw me edit this into this post cause i forgot to include it the first time no you didn't

aaaaand with that, that's pretty much all i feel like i wanted to talk about, there's a few other interesting things to speculate about but like i said before, this teaser really gives nothing away. or at least it doesn't if you've been following bts

ALSO the song is water on mars by the nude party and it's absolutely perfect which is no surprise whatsoever

[bicho-de-estrela]

If there's a path and if we can be assertive in choice finding it and thrive in with less spikes we know how much beauty our garden will bring with all growing flowers and Saint George swords,

There's dream of us in a green yard filled with the trees and flowers that the universe will bring

I think I found in my lost rhymes a way to get back - not lurking in the dark when you show me your light

This path that will show us the way one more time to that bridge we've been building and I will fill the trace with art - I brought my poetry back cause I couldnt reach your trace and I'll use all the words in all those sentences I once neglected - it is the only thing that is truly mine - and you brought my poetry back to life and I'll use it until we reach each other's arms again And I would try to build the perfect metric and write better sonnets than Vinicius de Morais - or I would at least try

Yet I'll write an essay about never letting you go again There's a fault I considered a sin and another night spent awake Trying to find you in the mess I made Following blind the love you gave me Never letting you alone again I want to be your lighthouse when you face a storm And your place to return

I'm writing an essay, About the mistakes when I wasnt enough Which I have been the one to blame writing lines in a foreign language that I can barely understand And yet i know you will translate it and get what im trying to say

You have been filling up a space no one never have where I have been setting up my defenses all my life Sometimes a wall is lead up by my imune emotional system but at some point it just bend to your will, I would never have guns lifted towards you're enough and have been bringing only the urge for peace since war could lead lne to death, you make make me seek for life - you are the one, you stayed even when we got lost in translation

If we were building the babel tower and our tongues got scramble out, we would still have it done building it up with no greed - I want the world with you, but you'll always be the most important - reaching heaven cause having you by my side has been the most precious experience in my life - you put light In the darkness and it bend to to your will but I cant control its resistence, i have been building shells and destroying bridges but now you're getting inside and im surrended

I really put your love above anything, Even letting my fingers put rhymes in my urge to be poetic maybe your love is washing away all the rights and wrongs All the structures I builded And i'm accepting that there's no shield that could be build up and resist to you

I have been blind quoting all poetry I left behind maybe those cliche rhymes In all not written lines has been set in motion giving birth to the urge to write something that could show you how much you worth to me

Your light brought to the surface even the darkest spot And there's no way to switch off the light that have been burning so bright, Leading the darkness to accept the light and light to understand the dark And these words that im trying to say many found in rhymes, And I always found so cliche - theres just this bid that find all things in its due time and when it gets to heavy it makes my heart leak and slip through my fingers just got me carried away humbled in such ordinary place making me write sentences and seek all those rhymes I never made because just "I Love You" is not enough anymore

Para R. S.

[xoteajays]

Now I'm curious to know if you have the same thoughts as me.. When you envision Rocky's dynamic ship (any ship) with a black widow type woman. What's the dynamic you think of. Because black widow types of archetype is a very interesting archetype to me. Most of the time.

Yes! Obviously he would buy her any of the favorite flowers she likes if he can buy those flowers. But he does seem like the classic roses guy to me. And like you mentioned, Rocky does have roses designed on a lot of his clothes too (like his clothes in End Of Sky, especially the red gloves). He's definitely the most traditional romantic of the H&L men.

~

Yes! Grungy. So of the tomboy and punk styles have a grungy style to their fashion.. Like grunge, punk, grungy punk. Those styles would be some of the styles I imagine for some of them anyway. So lots of their styles are definitely eclectic. They were what they are in the mood for.

And I knew about the skirts and shorts for Hinami because of her leg, since I think it would be difficult for her to walk around with any pants over her leg. Did you figure out how she got her injures? Or not yet?

If I'm rating my color coded characters on a scale to girly to tomboy... I would say Red and White/Green (don't know who of those two could be the girliest one), then Orange, then Blue. Blue is the most tomboy.

Despite Blue being the most tomboy one of these characters, I would have to say that Orange's actually the most physically active one with sports. She's definitely someone who would try anything once in life.

~

I have a vulgar thought. Which is no surprise to anyone. We've already established that if Rocky (or Koo) was romantically involved with girls - if they are really roommates in our stories, the other would probably leave to building for some time. Or just never leave their rooms until a lot of that was done. Or whatever they would do. Whatever happens... Anyway. What do you think would have if Rocky's girlfriend even tried to initiate sex with him while they were watching tv in the living room.

Obviously he would probably drag her to their room before actions do get too steamy between them. But I do also think it would be funny if the girlfriend kept trying to initiate sex with Rocky in public places. In the sense of public place areas being like those living room or kitchen areas instead of their bedroom, or in a backroom of Club Heaven. Not exactly in front of other people. But it's an interesting thought to me.

~

I keep forgetting that every country uses either °C and °F, so that just keeps throwing me off a bit. I don't know why. But I should be used to this by now. Anyway. 80°F is usually just spring and summer weather here (for the most part), sometimes on warmer autumn days but that doesn't happen that often though. You basically have summer season all year around. Basically like Florida, they always have warm weather.

~

Wait... Seriously? The new season that they keep promoting for Squid Games isn't actually a continuation to the original series like everyone thinks. But a reality game show of the series. Basically like the spinoff that no one wanted. Looking at the DTC spinoffs whenever I say that.

Then why promote the show like it's a second season then. Just say it was a spinoff show, not another season. I don't even watch the show.. But this is annoying me. That's just false advertisement in my opinion too. So why promote one thing it that thing is something else entirely different than what you're promoting. This annoys me way too much.

Maybe because I hate reality shows, and hate reality game shows like you wouldn't believe. I never had any interest in those type of shows.

Yes! Definitely give Red Garden a chance. I'd have recommendations.. But I should let you finish some other shows and movies before I may end up mentioning any more series. You'd already have a lot to watch.

There was a lot of anime cartoons that I watched as a child, like those 'cartoons' that were actually considered anime. Those cartoons.. But I don't remember every show I watched though so I can't remember if I might have watched Digimon. But I'd remember how the animation is to the show. Animation for anime and cartoons has improved greatly, at least when it comes to that specific series anyway. In my opinion.

At least now I know why you might need therapy then. Even that was the most bizarre animation, acting, dialogue.. You need therapy now.

So far enough. Both guys are attractive in their own way. So I may not blame the women if they have sex with either of those guys but then I would feel bad if the husband and wife cheated on each other though so I'm torn on that thought. Because I'm very strict about loyalty with the people who matter the most to you. So I'm very split on this topic.

But the mafia boss is stupid though. Vincenzo's not like that. Like the moment he feel in love with someone, he didn't act like an irrationally stupid person. He was still really intelligent about how he would have conducted his job as a mafia man and a lawyer. This guy's too stupid.

I feel like mafia men are actually attractive, besides their appearances I mean, is when they're actually intelligent. And he's not so intelligent.

Well.. If he's going to be thrown in prison, maybe even killed, then just have sex with the man once. Because events are just going to happen to him in some way. You'll probably never even actually see him again.

- 💋

i don’t have a full idea in mind, but i’m imagining like. a business rival type relationship. like a hostess club owner who manipulates the men that come into her business. she also takes in girls from bad situations, but as opposed to rocky’s protection of women, the black widow raises and trains up these girls in self defence ….. and also perhaps killing bad men. rocky treats the girls he takes in so carefully and protects them and kind of treats them like they’re fragile, but the black widow is like ‘women can kill. and they should.’ and probably does, admittedly, get her girls into some dangerous situations.

due to that difference, her and rocky butt heads over how they view and treat women. rocky’s ‘women need protecting’ vs the widow’s ‘women can protect themselves’.

also. the opposite colour dichotomy … but they both accent with red.

~

i haven’t fully decided on hinami’s accident yet. i still like the idea of her getting injured and then a bad infection while living in one of the crappy complexes from the worst spinoff. but i’m still trying to decide.

~

koo is just locking himself in his room whenever the gf comes around. like a polite ‘hello’ and then gone for the rest of the night because he doesn’t want to see something inappropriate.

i think, depending on the situation and/or location, that rocky might be into it. i could see him maybe being fine with making out. like pda type stuff. but not actual sex. if it’s somewhere a lot more private, then maybe. or maybe just heavy (heavier) petting.

~

celsius and fahrenheit is so confusing and i have to keep googling a converter so i can figure out what’s what. like if i’d just put ‘27°’ you’d probably have thought i was freezing to death ahdjdl. but yea, it’s like mid-to-late-20s celsius year round in australia.

~

yea it’s the dumb reality show based on the show. i’m not a huge fan of reality competition shows. i watch a couple cooking ones just for fun and background noise, and i watched ‘physical:100’ which was a korean competition show pitting people from different sports backgrounds against each other (which was pretty good actually, very interesting to see how different sports develop peoples’ bodies, lotta v pretty and fit people in it).

but nah. not a huge fan of reality shows and probably won’t be watching the squid game one. it’s not even a korean production, it’s fucking british.

digimon adventures is great! it’s so good and i’m nostalgic and i’ll take no criticism! it’s excellent!!

another anime i watched a lot as a kid - because my grandma had it on vhs - was orphen. we only had like 2 or 3 tapes tho, so i didn’t watch a whole lot of it but i remember it being pretty cool. and the main character was a pretty boy.

both guys are very hot. and i would like to see Stuff Happening. but also ….. i don’t really enjoy a cheating plot. like it’s uncomfortable.

the boss is smart when it comes to business most of the time! but he’s dumb with his heart and he’s pretty clear on the fact that he wanted to be so successful to eventually end up with the wife. he’s just dumb with his heart!! but he has a pretty decent business mind, i mean, he’s been very successful up to this point in linking up china, japan and korea for the drug trade and has a lot of companies under his control. he’s got a lot of money and control.

if only he could fucking focus on his gang and not his love-life. loverboy p l e a s e!

[the-single-element]

Good morning.

All summer, we've been hearing about the Kingdom, and about the steep slopes and pitfalls along the path that leads us back to it.

In today's excerpt from the Jerusalem Debates - which are, in a way, a recapitulation of everything Matthew's Good News has told us up to now - Jesus reframes these barriers by joining them with a new metaphor: that of the Kingdom as a wedding feast.

Although perhaps we shouldn't call it "new" exactly, because this is, in a way, yet another example of Jesus building his argument on the testimony of John. Indeed, as Jesus's popularity was growing, John had something to say about this wedding party - about this bride and bridegroom:

I am not the Messiah. I am only here to prepare the way for him. It is the bridegroom who marries the bride, and the bridegroom’s friend is simply glad to stand with him and hear his vows. Therefore, I am filled with joy at his success.

And once again, John was echoing his favorite prophet: Isaiah. But this time, it was the third Isaiah, writing to a Jewish people who had already returned from exile, who described the messianic age to those returners by prophesying:

For as a young man marries a virgin, your Builder shall marry you; And as a bridegroom rejoices in his bride so shall your God rejoice in you.

So now we have this metaphor for the coming of the Kingdom as not just a reunion but a wedding banquet - a creation of an unbreakable bond, and a time of unfettered rejoicing.

And Jesus takes this image, and uses it to continue the theme of his critique of the theological leaders of his time. He uses it to make a provocative argument, one that was not yet part of the discourse: that limiting admission to the Kingdom to one ethnic group won't be enough, especially when - thanks to those leaders' blindness - so many of the sower's seeds will fail to find fertile soil. Indeed, even though the king in today's parable invites everyone, not everyone comes... and, as Jesus warned us in parable after parable this summer, not everyone who tries to come will actually put in the effort - to till their own soil, to groom themselves for a wedding - that is necessary to get in the door. Wheat and darnel are both gathered, and only later are they sorted out.

No longer is the bride merely the people of Israel. And the first Isaiah - admitting as much - describes his vision of that wedding banquet today, to a people who have not yet tasted exile:

On this mountain the LORD of hosts will provide for all peoples a feast of rich food and choice wines, juicy, rich food and pure, choice wines. On this mountain he will destroy the veil that veils all peoples, the web that is woven over all nations; he will destroy death forever. The Lord GOD will wipe away the tears from every face; the reproach of his people he will remove from the whole earth; for the LORD has spoken. On that day it will be said: "Behold our God, to whom we looked to save us! This is the LORD for whom we looked; let us rejoice and be glad that he has saved us!" For the hand of the LORD will rest on this mountain.

It's easy to read this imagery and think of this as purely eschatological - something for the future day when the Kingdom will come in power. But, as we have heard again and again, the Kingdom is not merely something that will come someday. It's in our midst, within us and among us. That beautiful imagery - rich food and choice wines, peeling back the veils that hide us from each other, every tear wiped away - we can have it today. It can be as simple as "offering a cup of water" to someone, as Paul reminds us in his dispatch to Philippi, rejoicing at the rewards that await them for their kindness to him, even though he didn't actually need it!

This is the Kingdom at work. This is the logic of God, the logic of the Kingdom of Heaven, that wedding feast where "the stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone".

We await that Kingdom where God will wipe away all our tears. But... why wait? Let's put on our wedding garments, till the soil of our hearts, bring some grapes from Isaiah's vineyard - whatever the metaphors for the underlying truth. That's Jesus's recap lesson for us, in these latter days: if we can change our hearts... if we can overcome our indifference and put ourselves in order... then not only can we get there, but we can be there today.