#the last sentence is ever so much better when you consider what he becomes

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

day four: watching while loved ones are hurt

a Vaniah story. word count 1,431.

After the incident with the tranquillising a week ago, Maria had become positively foolhardy. She talked back to Jim, who seemed to enjoy it, and had put on an air of bravado that fooled precisely nobody. It surprised and frankly worried Vaniah. She had been nervous: now she was hard. Training was making her hard.

But it was making him hard too. His instinctive reaction to thinking about his family now was a faint tinge of disgust; they were not only sheltered but weak. It took another moment before he reminded himself that they were not weak but had different strengths. He was becoming superior.

He was also gradually losing sight of the honest reasons he had signed up for this career in the first place. He was scarcely aware that that was happening: only when he lay awake at night, wishing he could sleep and finding no rest. Usually, though, he was too tired to lie awake, and slept dreamlessly.

Today there was nothing happening until after lunch should have come and gone. At that time he had not eaten for nearly twenty-four hours, as dinner had been off the menu. Was Jim planning to starve them all? It probably should have bothered him more than it did. He was learning to take life as it came; the fear was dying slowly, leaving him an emotionless shell.

Somehow that didn’t bother him as much as it ought.

The siren went when the day was coming towards evening; everyone moved with alacrity to the meeting hall, glad to have something more than hanging about to do. Vaniah found his place next to Mordecai, and looked attentively to the front, where Jim was standing as usual.

“Form into pairs,” said Jim coolly. Vaniah turned swiftly to Mordecai, who nodded and put his arm through Vaniah’s elbow. “Line up in your pairs.”

This feels like primary school, thought Vaniah. Like children.

He was unsurprised to see the first pair ordered off to a different room, and gradually each pair was sent to one of the several smaller rooms nearby. He waited without thought or fear. He had learned to stop helplessly panicking. In this his training was becoming useful. Presently they reached the front of the line, then were sent into another small room: the one in which, weeks ago, he had been medically tested. The same doctor was waiting there, masked and gowned.

“Who wants to be chosen for this test?” he said.

Vaniah hesitated, and because he hesitated Mordecai spoke.

“I’ll do it.”

The doctor turned, left the room and came back with two chairs. He tied Mordecai, passive and unresisting, to one, then Vaniah to the other. They stared at one another. Vaniah was commencing to worry.

“Remember you chose this,” said the doctor, and slapped Mordecai hard across the face. His head was flung backwards by the impact, and the chair rocked. He uttered a startled yell.

Vaniah moved. He was securely bound, but he threw his weight against his restraints and moved the chair forward a couple of inches. “Don’t hurt him!” he said sharply. “Hurt me instead!”

Mordecai looked dazed. He blinked, then shook his head vaguely and winced.

The doctor slapped him again. This time Mordecai kept his eyes closed.

“Don’t you hear me? I want to be chosen. Don’t hurt him.” Again Vaniah threw his weight against the ropes, and this time a knot gave. “Don’t—!”

As he got his arm free the doctor punched Mordecai, closed fist and hard. Mordecai’s head hung limp.

“You’re hurting a defenceless man!” exclaimed Vaniah violently, wrenching his arm free and reaching out to grab the other’s lab coat. “What are you, a coward? Can’t you let him free to fight, at least? This is senseless!”

All his anger did nothing; the doctor glanced at him emotionlessly. “You chose to let him be hurt.”

“I did not! I just—I hesitated. For one second. Let him go and hurt me instead. He doesn’t deserve this.”

“And you do?”

“Yes,” said Vaniah without hesitation. “More than Mordecai does.”

The doctor got a bucket of water and flung it in Mordecai’s face. The boy groaned.

“Your choices led to this,” said the doctor calmly. They made eye contact. “It’s your fault.”

“You’re lying,” said Vaniah, without conviction. “It’s not my fault.”

“I wouldn’t be hurting him except for you. This is your own fault. Your choice.”

“Hurt me instead.” He wrenched at his bonds again, unsuccessfully. “Damn it! Don’t hurt Mordecai!”

The doctor took a lighter from his pocket and flicked it on, holding it up. “I wonder how this will feel?” he said in a conversational tone.

Vaniah, shaking, tried to reach for it. He would gladly suffer the burn if he could prevent it from being applied to Mordecai, who was still barely conscious.

“You coward,” he seethed. “Hurting an innocent man—!”

“Innocent? None of us are innocent. Why are you trying to protect him? What’s he ever done for you?”

“Basic human decency! And he, this friend of mine—”

“None of you should have friends. Just for that—” And he held the lighter against the back of Mordecai’s hand. Mordecai flinched violently, but the doctor gripped his wrist.

“Stop!” Vaniah jerked his chair forward several inches. He didn’t care that he was crying. “Stop it! Stop hurting him! Why are you doing this?”

“Because of you. I heard you the other day, talking to Maria. I hear everything you say.” He removed the lighter, let Mordecai’s hand drop to his lap again. It looked charred; Vaniah didn’t want to look too closely. “You see, I’m being completely serious that this is your fault. None of the others are being hurt.”

Vaniah closed his eyes. He wasn’t quite sure enough that the man was lying to shake the guilt. It was his fault. It was. If only he hadn’t— Mordecai groaned again. The doctor was prodding the burn, and saying in a mild, childlike tone, “That’s interesting.”

“What’s your name?” asked Vaniah.

He had a purpose, but the man looked at him with raised eyebrows and said gently, “Why are you worrying about my name when your friend is injured and you can’t tend to him and it’s all your fault?”

Vaniah closed his eyes. Then he opened them and said coldly, “I want to know your name so that once I’m out of this cursed place I can come and hunt you down and kill you.”

“And how would you do that?”

“I will find out where you live. I will watch you as you go in and out every day of your life. I will find out who you love and who you hate, and I will protect the ones you hate from your wrath. Then I will follow you, one day on your way to work, and I will kill you with a thousand cuts, slowly, and I will enjoy your death screams. You will die only after begging for death for a long time. It will not be pretty. But you will never know when your doom is about to come upon you until it is coming. You will fear me for every day of the rest of your miserable existence. I can strike whenever I like. You know I am strong, and I am growing stronger. Fear me.”

He thought the doctor had gone a little pale. But the man rallied and said, “You are in my power.”

“For now,” said Vaniah: and smiled. “Only for now.”

“Because you said that,” was the calm response, “your friend, or the person you called your friend, is going to hurt more. Do you think Mordecai will forgive you, Vaniah?”

“Mordecai is very forgiving,” he said coldly. “I know that he will forgive me.”

“Even for this?” The doctor leaned down, gripped Mordecai’s chin hard and said, “Mordecai!” When the boy stirred, mumbling incoherently, he continued: “This is Vaniah’s fault, you understand?” Mordecai blinked and eventually nodded.

“Vaniah’s fault,” repeated the doctor, and hit him again. Vaniah clenched his fists and tried to get out of his binding again. Again he failed.

“How can you?” he asked. “You’re a monster.”

“We’re all monsters here. You will be one too, if you aren’t already.”

“I swear I never shall.”

“Oh, but you’ve changed already. You’re a different man to when you came in. Some things can never be undone.”

The words hit home like he had been struck. “I am not and never will be a monster.”

The doctor smiled; slowly, broadly, cruelly. “That’s what every monster thinks.”

[inlovewithquestionablecharacters]

Hey,

Do you still take Hannibal requests? If you do, could you please write a story, where Hannibal get‘s very jealous after a night out in the opera. The reader had finally met Franklyn, who is very interested in her ( because she‘s friends with Hannibal and part of the cheese folk).Hannibal is visibly angry when they are back in their opera seats… Could you also please end it with smut ( if you are comfortable with that).Thanks for considering!<3

A/n: Hey Hon thanks for the request i hope you like it!

Hannibal Lector x Reader: Jealousy, Jealousy

Warnings:smut, biting, kissing, penetration (p in v), fingering, possessive behaviour, public sex, unwanted flirting (from Franklin), fluff, happy ending, no use of y/n, female reader

Word count:2,9K

Hannibal is pissed. No scratch that. He’s seething. But you can’t see it. No one can. He’s just that good at hiding it. Even so, everyone has a breaking point. 

This was Hannibals.

Franklin had met you at the last opera you and Hannibal had gone to and from that moment it seemed he had grown some sort of infatuation with you. Hannibal always loathed his sessions with Franklin, his ever growing desire to be Hannibal’s friends making the doctor rather uncomfortable, but he never imagined it could get worse. Boy was he mistaken. It seemed like Franklin couldn’t utter a single sentence without mentioning your name. Hannibal watched him dance around the subject for days until he finally got to the point.

“You think you could give me her number?”

“I'm sorry?”

“Her number. I wanted to ask if she’d be free for some wine tasting but I don't know how to reach her. And then I thought you must have her number since you two seem close.”

“I don’t think she’d be interested.”

“Oh well maybe you could give me it anyway and i could ask-”

“I will not be giving you her number and that is final.”

An eerie silence took over the room. Hannibal watched Franklin open and close his mouth silently before settling back into his chair. It seemed clear to Hannibal that his patient had finally gotten the message.

 Once again he was wrong.

You were nursing a glass of wine that Hannibal had picked out for you as your eyes studied the opera house. Hannibal was next to you, his body mare inches from yours but not close enough to allow contact. You watched people come up to Hannibal in greeting before quickly going away.

“As always you’re quite the topic.”

“I don’t know what you mean dear.”

“Don’t be modest Hannibal. It's clear these people admire you. They may even wish to be you.”

You caught sight of a girl making flirtatious eyes to Hannibal and couldn’t help but smirk.

“Or maybe be with you. Either way they consider you appealing.”

Hannibal watched you as you spoke, his eyes never leaving your frame. It was intriguing how observant you could be and how unseeing you were at the same time. It didn’t matter how many women tried to impress him, his eyes always found themselves glued to you. You always had his full attention.

Always.

It was beginning to become a problem.

Hannibal had been so focused on looking at you that he hadn’t noticed someone new had approached. It was only when Hannibal heard the familiar voice that he realized you two had company. The doctor watched Franklin greet you with a kiss on your hand. The sight itself made Hannibal clench his hands into fists. He tried to remind himself he was in the middle of a very crowded place. A place filled with people who knew him. Seeing him throw a punch at a patient would ruin his career. Still he’d never felt an urge to knock someone out so much in his life.

You were always a kind person. Very well mannered and aware of your words. So it shouldn’t surprise Hannibal when you kept conversing with Franklin, occasionally even laughing at his terrible jokes. Hannibal zeroed in his attention on your lips. He observed the way they wrapped around the rim of the glass as you took a sip of your drink. The drink he’d picked for you because he knew you pallet better than anyone.

It had occurred to Hannibal a few months back that he was growing interested in you in a not so friendly way. But it was only when Franklin asked for your number that he realized how deeply he was falling for you. He wanted you for himself. And he would make that happen.

You were starting to get annoyed. Franklin was a nice guy but it was clear he didn’t know how to take no for an answer. You could see the way he was subtly, at least in his eyes, trying to flirt with you. It’s safe to say you weren’t interested. Not that he seemed to be getting that message. A noise rang out into the room telling you all the intermission was coming to an end.

“Well look at that, time just flies when you’re having fun huh?”

You gave Franklin a weak smile .

“We should be going, Franklin. Our seats are at the top so we have to climb a lot of stairs.”

“Oh okay.”

“Maybe we'll see you at the next opera?”

God you hopped not.

“Actually I was wondering if I could get your number.”

You froze, a concerned smile plastered to your face. Gosh he really didn’t let up did he? In a moment of pure panic at the thought of having to deal with Franklin calling at all hours of the night you grabbed onto Hannibal's arm. The doctor's focus moved to where your delicate hands were wrapped around his forearm. You looked up at him with pleading eyes before turning back to Franklin.

“Actually I’m already spoken for.”

“Oh wow I didn’t….realize.”

“Yes well we are very much together so…. Yeah.”

And uncomfortable silence covered the three of you. You tried to think of something to say. Anything to get you away from here. Before you had time to come up with something Hannibal spoke.

“Come on dear. If we don’t hurry we might miss something.”

You let out a relieved breath as Hannibal moved his hand to wrap around your waist, guiding you away from Franklin. You kept your eyes forward as the two of you walked. It was only when you were out of Franklin's view that you started laughing. You braced yourself on your thighs as you laughed.

“Oh gosh. That was just dreadful. He was so-“

“Annoying.”

“Incredibly annoying! Honestly Hannibal I don't know how you can deal with being in a room with him for an hour.”

“Didn’t seem like you were having such a hard time.”

You lifted your head to look at the doctor with a curious expression. He was looking down at you with a look you rarely ever saw, at least not directed towards you. Hannibal Lecter was annoyed. And at you no less. You crossed your arms over your chest.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“You seemed to be enjoying talking to him. Laughing at his jokes. Making small talk.”

“It's called manners, Hannibal. As far as I know you value them quite a lot.”

Hannibal stalked over to you causing you to take a step back. Your back hit the wall, making you gasp. Hannibal hovered over you, his eyes boring into your soul.

“Hannibal what are you-“

“Did you enjoy his attention? Did you like the way he was looking at you? He was staring so hard I was surprised his eyes didn’t pop out of their sockets.”

“What the hell’s gotten into you?”

“Into me? Weren’t you the one who was just clinging onto my body like I was your savior?”

You’d never seen Hannibal like this. For the first time since you knew him he looked like an animal. His usually neat hair was slightly flopping over his face and the expert calm facade he always had seemed to have slipped. He looked like a predator and you were his prey. You lifted your hand so that you could touch his arm. He looked at your hand on his frame. It was as if your touch was burning him. He needed to feel you but he was afraid of what that would mean. You whispered his name causing him to face you. You looked up at him with wide eyes, your lips slightly parted as you breathed.

He hadn’t even realized he was boxing you into the wall with his body until he felt the heat that radiated from you. He couldn’t think straight with you so near him but he couldn’t bear to be far from you either. It was then that he realized just how much he craved you. He felt like a lion who’d been starved for days and had finally been given a piece of steak. 

He was going to devour you.

Without a second thought Hannibal shoved his lips against yours. Your body reacted immediately, hand moving to wrap around his neck as he deepened the kiss. Hannibal moved his hand to your leg, hitching it up. You gasped into his mouth as his fingers skimmed over your skin. He enjoyed the sounds you made as he pushed your underwear to the side. His fingers moved over your pussy and he couldn’t help but groan as he felt how wet you were. Your nails dug into his blazer as he inserted one of his digits into you. Your back rubbed against the wall as he continued to bully his fingers into your cunt. A moan slipped through your lips before you managed to cover your mouth, the realization that anyone could just walk by and see you finally becoming clear.

“Hannibal we-“

“Shhh I’m trying to enjoy the opera.”

You could hear the opera singer belting out a note from afar. The sound was dulled by the heavy doors but you could still make it out. Hannibal hummed the song as he continued to finger you. You were trying to keep as quiet as possible but he wasn’t making it easy on you. He knew exactly what to do to have you screaming out for him.

“Hannibal please, I'm so close.”

“Oh yeah? Think you deserve it?”

“Yes please. Please make me cum.”

“Even after flirting with Franklin in front of me?”

This little shit.

“Hannibal please…. I’m sorry.”

“Who do you belong to hum?”

“You.”

“Speak up dear, I can't hear you.”

“You Hannibal! I belong to you!”

“That's right. Go on then. Cum on my fingers.”

You hid your face in the crook of Hannibal's neck as a silent moan ripped through your body. He felt your teeth graze his collar bone through his shirt as your mouth opened in pleasure making him smirk. Your juices continued to coat his fingers as he attempted to help you through your high. Your body shook against him, your limbs spasming as you tried to regain control of your brain. You knew Hannibal's knowledge of the human body made him good at many things but you never stopped to contemplate the effect his expertise would have on a more sexual context.  

Once you’d come back down to earth you pushed your body off of Hannibals allowing you to look into his eyes. You continued to breathe heavily as you looked at him trying to figure out what would happen next. You hadn't expected him to lean down and kiss your lips but you welcomed the action. You warped your arms around his neck tugging him even closer to you. Hannibal's hands made their way to your hips squeezing lightly at your flesh. You bite into his bottom lip as his mouth moved away from yours. You couldn’t help the giggle that made its way out of your lips.

Hannibal grinned down at you, his thumb caressing your hip bone as he continued to observe you. Your hair was covering your face and your lips were swollen from kissing him. Hannibal didn’t look much better, his pupils were dilated and his heart was hammering in chest. You noticed the wild look in his eyes and in a sudden burst of confidence you decided to move your leg up against Hannibal's body. His eyes darted to your leg before moving back to your face. You bite into your lip, your fingers moving to tug at the small hairs on the back of Hannibal's head. You watched his brows furrow a bit at the action. “You gonna fuck me Doctor lector?”

“What makes you say that?”

“The look on your face.”

“And what look would that be?”

“The look of a man who is about to turn into an animal.”

Hannibal's expression faltered slightly at your comment. He wondered from a moment if you’d understand him if he told you what he was capable of. He wondered if your eyes would widen in fear or if they would simply spike up in curiosity. You placed your palm on his cheek causing him to focus on you once more.

“You okay?”

“No.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m starved.”

Hannibal gave you a wolfish grin as his hand made its way to your ass. You gasped as he pushed your body up, legs instinctively wrapping around his hips. You steady yourself on his shoulders waiting to see what he would do. Hannibal tugged your dress up your legs allowing him to view your underwear. He moved his hand to his pants tugging at the zipper. You watched him in anticipation, eyes widening as he pulled his dick from its confines. You whined as he pushed your underwear to the side, positioning himself near your entrance. A gasp left your lips as he pushed into you. Your nails dug into his blazer. Hannibal braced one hand on the wall as he began to pistol into you.

Your moans filled his ears as he continued to brutally fuck into you. The sound of you combined with the sounds of the opera far away were like music to his ears. He wondered why he’d never thought of doing this before. You’d been to his home many times it wouldn’t have been hard to get you into his bed but he supposed this was nice too. He felt a rush move through his body at the thought of someone walking in on the two of you. He wished it would be Franklin, the need to show his patient that you belonged to him becoming overwhelming. His head moved to your neck, tongue moving against the soft skin before he sunk his teeth into you. Your walls clenched around him at the action causing him to let out a grunt.

“Hannibal-ah ugh ah shit- don’t stop.”

He was never going to stop. He’d feast on your body for as long as he could, in every way he knew how. He would never be satiated with the feeling of you. There was no going back now Hannibal would have to make you entirely his. 

He continues to nibble at your skin, desperately trying to mark you as much as he can. He wants to scare off any other suitors but he also enjoys the thought of you walking around covered in marks he’s given you. Mine, he thinks, this one is all mine. You're clenching around his dick like a vice which tells him you’re getting closer to your release. He wants you to beg for it, wants you to ask him to cum. It seems you can read his mind because without him even opening his mouth you’re already whining for him, telling him how good he feels and how much you want to cum on his dick. So he lets you but not before filling you to the brim with his seed. He wants you so full off him that his cum starts to seep out. He wants you to smell like him so everyone else knows who you belong to. 

You’re having a hard time getting your heart to calm down. Hannibals still holding onto your body, trying his best to keep you upright as his own legs threaten to buckle. Neither one of you speaks, opting to just share the space in silence for a moment. You hear muffled applause, the sound telling you that the opera has ended. You pull your dress down covering your body once again. Once you think you're decent your hands move to Hannibal now soft dick, stuffing it back in his pants for him. He doesn't move away from you as you straighten his tie or when you fix his hair for him. He lets you build his facade back up without any complaint. As you finish making sure he too is decent you place your hands on his chest.

“Can’t ruin your reputation, can we now Doctor Lecter?”

He smiles at you, his own hands moving to fix your messy hair. Then he moves to place a gentle kiss on your lips. It's a tender action which causes your heart to skip a beat. As the two of you share a loving kiss the doors of the opera open. People pile into the hall you and Hannibal are in, not one of them aware of what was happening a couple of minutes prior. You allow Hannibal to guide you into the crowd, his hand comfortably warping around your waist. You let your body curl into him.

“Let’s go home my dear. I’m dying for another meal.”

Something about the way he talks makes you think he isn’t talking about food.

[fullstcp]

"The Secret of Us" by Gracie Abrams Sentence Starters

FELT GOOD ABOUT YOU

"I felt good about you 'til I didn't."

"You got what you demanded."

"Picture perfect like you planned it."

"We were fighting more than laughing."

"Fell hard, then I lost your interest."

"Got me where you want me, in your palm."

"All my friends, they tried to stop me wanting you."

"It took all of me to walk away."

"There were nights I skipped out sleeping cause of you."

RISK

"Said I wouldn't do it, but I hunted you down."

"Guess I'm just scared of you shooting it down."

"You can just talk, and I'll stare at your mouth."

"You're not here, and it don't feel right."

"God, I'm actually invested."

"Watch this be the wrong thing, classic."

"I'm jumping in the deep end, it's more fun to swim in."

"Heard the risk is drowning, but I'm gonna take it."

"Isn't it fun thinking I'm right when I'm probably wrong?"

"I'm gonna bend 'til I break."

"You'll be my favorite mistake."

"You're the risk, I'm gonna take it."

"Why aren't you here in my bedroom?"

"Too soon to tell you 'I love you'."

BLOWING SMOKE

"I let it go for my peace of mind."

"Bit the bullet, it didn't hurt."

"I still hate the image of you kissing her/him/them."

"It's all for the better."

"Tell me, is/are she/he/they prettier than he/she/they was/were on the internet?"

"I know what you are."

"I'll say what they won't."

"I know everything they don't."

"You look stupid going out."

"If she's/he's/they've got a pulse, she/he/they meet(s) your standards now."

"You feel nothing."

"I find your books pretentious now."

"You knew my last love let me down."

"I bet you think about me now when you should be sleeping."

I LOVE YOU, I'M SORRY

"I told the truth, but you didn't like it."

"That's just the way life goes."

"I like to slam doors closed."

"Trust me, I know it's always about me."

"I love you, I'm sorry."

"I might not feel real, but it's okay."

"I push my luck, it shows."

"Thankful you don't send someone to kill me."

"You were the best but you were the worst."

"I loved you first."

"I was a dick, it is what it is."

"This shit never ends."

"I'm wrong again."

us

"I know you know."

"It felt just like a joke."

"I know your ghost."

"Someone always ends up in ruins."

"What seemed like fate becomes 'what the hell was I doing'?"

"Do you miss us?"

"Wonder if you regret the secret of us."

"How can you be cold when I open my home?"

"The flames always end up in ashes."

"Give it ten months and you'll be past it."

"You're incomparable."

LET IT HAPPEN

"I'm a walking contradiction and it shows."

"I had a backbone made of glass and then it broke."

"I've never craved someone's attention as much as yours."

"I'd bet all my money that I will lose to you and hand you my life."

"Here's to hoping you're worth all my time."

"Don't love you yet, but probably will."

"Turn me into something tragic."

"I let it happen."

"I can tell that I'm projecting half the time."

"It's the only thing that helps me sleep at night."

"You've turned all my skies to pouring rain."

"Is this how you see me?"

"I'll spare you from everything."

"If you would still have me, I'll be waiting all my life."

TOUGH LOVE

"I hate when we fight."

"That's just tough love."

"I'm not charmed so I'm leaving."

"I guess it's always funny until it's not."

"At night it's kind of tempting to see if you'd just float."

"I know what I'm leaving for."

I KNEW IT, I KNOW YOU

"I swear to God, I haven't thought of you in ages"

"I understand, I changed your plans, I had to."

"All I did was right by me."

"I heard that almost killed you."

"I think that you earnestly have waited on apologies, but I can't pretend that I'm sorry."

"We don't even know each other now."

"I'd blow all my plans if you'd meet me out."

"You had the wrong idea about me."

"All I ever did was consider you."

"You don't know how to step outside yourself."

"It's not my fault you can't sit with the hard thing."

"You really thought you would get what you wanted."

GAVE YOU I GAVE YOU I

"You were my worst time."

"Am I what you wanted?"

"I'm just so embarrassed now."

"You did all that I wouldn't do."

"You got bored and I felt used."

"Would it have killed you to explain that you weren't ready?"

"When did you slip through my fingers?"

"Did I ever have you?"

"Was I just a placeholder to fill the hole inside you?"

NORMAL THING

"It's a normal thing to fall in love with movie stars."

"I remember when I saw your face not long ago."

"Maybe that was the beginning of our love affair."

"I know there's more than that feeling."

"Don't worry, I know I'll see you again."

"You were great, what a show, but I don't recommend."

"It's a normal thing for me to become underwhelmed."

"I think we call that performing."

"That's not how I want to spend my life."

"You changed my life, but I guess I'll see ya."

"It's over now, so I guess I'll see ya."

GOOD LUCK CHARLIE

"You keep a picture of her/him/them inside your wallet."

"Now it all comes down to you."

"I hope you're happy."

"This isn't what you wanted."

"You know that it's her/him/them or nothing."

"You feel her/him/them everywhere."

"She/he/they is/are the love of your life."

"I hope you're ready."

FREE NOW

"This isn't what you want, it's only how you feel."

"I finally know better than to wait for you back here."

"You're the saddest, but a good kid."

"Almost loved you, but I didn't."

"I know that you're removed, I can feel it when we talk."

"You start to let me in, but then you shut it off."

"I swear that I'm not mad at you, but I can't share your bed now."

"You were straight up with me, you were so kind."

"We're collateral here."

"Hope you find somewhere safe for your baggage."

"It was something I was scared of 'til you made me love it."

"If you feel like falling, catch me on the way down."

"All I feel is free now."

"If there is a right time, chances are I'll be here."

"We could share a lifeline."

CLOSE TO YOU

"I don't got a single problem with provocative."

"You saw me look at you."

"I burn for you and you don't even know my name."

"If you asked me to, I'd give up everything."

"I wanna be close to you."

"Just let me be close to you."

"You should be mine for life."

"You could be mine tonight."

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Such are the effects of mob law; and such as the scenes, becoming more and more frequent in this land so lately famed for love of law and order; and the stories of which, have even now grown too familiar, to attract any thing more, than an idle remark.

But you are, perhaps, ready to ask, "What has this to do with the perpetuation of our political institutions?" I answer, it has much to do with it. Its direct consequences are, comparatively speaking, but a small evil; and much of its danger consists, in the proneness of our minds, to regard its direct, as its only consequences. 

Abstractly considered, the hanging of the gamblers at Vicksburg, was of but little consequence. They constitute a portion of population, that is worse than useless in any community; and their death, if no pernicious example be set by it, is never matter of reasonable regret with any one. If they were annually swept, from the stage of existence, by the plague or small pox, honest men would, perhaps, be much profited, by the operation.—

Similar too, is the correct reasoning, in regard to the burning of the negro at St. Louis. He had forfeited his life, by the perpetration of an outrageous murder, upon one of the most worthy and respectable citizens of the city; and had not he died as he did, he must have died by the sentence of the law, in a very short time afterwards. As to him alone, it was as well the way it was, as it could otherwise have been. But the example in either case, was fearful.—

When men take it in their heads to day, to hang gamblers, or burn murderers, they should recollect, that, in the confusion usually attending such transactions, they will be as likely to hang or burn some one who is neither a gambler nor a murderer as one who is; and that, acting upon the example they set, the mob of to-morrow, may, and probably will, hang or burn some of them by the very same mistake. And not only so; the innocent, those who have ever set their faces against violations of law in every shape, alike with the guilty, fall victims to the ravages of mob law; and thus it goes on, step by step, till all the walls erected for the defense of the persons and property of individuals, are trodden down, and disregarded. But all this even, is not the full extent of the evil.—

By such examples, by instances of the perpetrators of such acts going unpunished, the lawless in spirit, are encouraged to become lawless in practice; and having been used to no restraint, but dread of punishment, they thus become, absolutely unrestrained.—

Having ever regarded Government as their deadliest bane, they make a jubilee of the suspension of its operations; and pray for nothing so much, as its total annihilation. While, on the other hand, good men, men who love tranquility, who desire to abide by the laws, and enjoy their benefits, who would gladly spill their blood in the defense of their country; seeing their property destroyed; their families insulted, and their lives endangered; their persons injured; and seeing nothing in prospect that forebodes a change for the better; become tired of, and disgusted with, a Government that offers them no protection; and are not much averse to a change in which they imagine they have nothing to lose. Thus, then, by the operation of this mobocractic spirit, which all must admit, is now abroad in the land, the strongest bulwark of any Government, and particularly of those constituted like ours, may effectually be broken down and destroyed—

I mean the attachment of the People. Whenever this effect shall be produced among us; whenever the vicious portion of population shall be permitted to gather in bands of hundreds and thousands, and burn churches, ravage and rob provision-stores, throw printing presses into rivers, shoot editors, and hang and burn obnoxious persons at pleasure, and with impunity; depend on it, this Government cannot last. By such things, the feelings of the best citizens will become more or less alienated from it; and thus it will be left without friends, or with too few, and those few too weak, to make their friendship effectual. At such a time and under such circumstances, men of sufficient talent and ambition will not be wanting to seize the opportunity, strike the blow, and overturn that fair fabric, which for the last half century, has been the fondest hope, of the lovers of freedom, throughout the world. I know the American People are much attached to their Government;—I know they would suffer much for its sake;—

I know they would endure evils long and patiently, before they would ever think of exchanging it for another. Yet, notwithstanding all this, if the laws be continually despised and disregarded, if their rights to be secure in their persons and property, are held by no better tenure than the caprice of a mob, the alienation of their affections from the Government is the natural consequence; and to that, sooner or later, it must come.

—Abraham Lincoln, "The Perpetuation of Our Political Institutions," an address before the Young Men's Lyceum of Springfield, Illinois, Jan 27, 1838

[Robert Scott Horton]

[enhabot]

𝗹𝘂𝘃𝗯𝗼𝘁. ─  25 [ don’t cry over spilled milkis. ]          𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕. 2.1k ──────────

you’re nervously fidgeting on a park bench near your student accommodations when you spot yang jungwon running towards you. it’s only been a week since you’ve last seen him in-person; yet, for some reason, the palms of your hands have become incredibly clammy. you turn to the side and whip out a compact mirror.

you look like gaunt shit. well, it sort of makes sense considering that you haven’t had a good night’s rest ever since the event you’ve decided to dub ‘the friday night fiasco’.

“yn?” you turn to see a familiar face. jungwon doesn’t look so well himself. it’s almost as if he hadn’t been getting enough rest or nutrition— maybe, even light— in the past few days. you shoot him a look of deep concern, before noticing the round beads of sweat forming on the sides of his neck and forehead. “did you run here?” you ask him. “uhh, just a light jog. did you wait long?“ jungwon asks. you shake your head no, and beckon him to have a seat next to you. he hands you a can of milkis from a nearby vending machine. “thanks,” you smile at him but it feels a bit strained. you have the entire conversation mapped out in your mind: you’ll explain the situation with sunoo, and tell him that you haven’t been contacting him because you’ve been sorting out your own feelings regarding the situation. sure, you'd be concealing a few major details from him, but this is for the best. give it a few months and perhaps your feeling for him will subdue. it’s no big deal. this simple white lie is for the sake of everyone involved, you tell yourself.

still, you don’t feel entirely satisfied with this outcome.

the two of you sit in awkwardly quietude, occasionally taking sips from your respective cans. you notice that the scent surrounding the two of you closely resembles pork belly wraps and grilled beef intestine. in attempt to start a conversation, you say the first thing that comes to mind. “it smells… like meat?” you pause. one beat, two beats of silence pass. and then, heat proceeds to rise to jungwon’s face. “i came directly from dinner with sunghoon. we had barbecue, so…” he trails off and you resist the keen urge to slam your head onto concrete. the air feels even thicker with uneasy silence as you two break eye contact in attempt to recollect yourselves. so awkward.

you clear your throat, “so—“

“well— jungwon simultaneously begins his sentence before clamping his mouth shut. he laughs a little. “you go first.” suddenly, you’re reminiscent of the first proper conversation the two of you had. well, the first exchange the two of you had that wasn’t a dumb argument over some ludicrous misunderstanding. you chuckle a little, and jungwon looks relieved. well, at least the awkwardness has settled. your lips curl into a half-smile, “okay. well, i just…”

now what do i say? you begin to panic as days of mental preparation trickle down the drain. should i just be honest? “hey, i haven’t talked to you for like a week or two because my best friend of over five years confessed to me — but here’s the catch, i actually like you! we can stay friends even after this huge mess, right? and just ignore the fact that i have feelings for you.” fuck no! i can’t say that.you come to the realization that the rehearsed exchange with your bedroom wall sounded considerably better than the words loosely playing in your mind. you inhale, gripping onto the barely-touched soda can with your two hands. you feel the condensation seeping through the cracks between your fingers. it feels cold and a little uncomfortable. jungwon glances at you, anxiously. “yn—“

you groan. “this would be so much easier if i could just say ‘jungwon, i like you. i’ve liked you for awhile’,” you mutter. before you can realize that you were in fact thinking out loud, jungwon spits out his drink. “gross, dude!” you yelp, hurriedly handing him a few wrinkled restaurant napkins from your pocket. “what did you say?“ he sounds exasperated. you blink. wait, what did i just say?

the embarrassment that followed hits you like a ton of bricks. “oh, man. that’s not how this was supposed to go,” you utter. “you… like me?” jungwon looks at you, expression entirely dumbfounded. “you weren’t going to reject me?” he asks you. you gaze back at him with a similar level of disbelief. “reject you? why would i reject you, jungwon?” you respond, before pausing in realization.“wait a second. you like me, too?” you sputter.

“since when?” he suddenly questions.

“since what?” you’re flustered.

“since when have you liked me?”

“i mean, i always thought you were cute. we just kind of got off on the wrong foot, so i always denied being attracted to you — but that’s the not the point. i’ve liked you ever since we hung out at the han river.” you breathe in a sharp breath as you attempt to hide the growing crimson blushing to develop on the apples of your cheeks. you're mortified, to say the absolute least. this is most definitely not going as planned “okay, besides that!” your voice becomes an embarrassingly high-pitched squeak. “what about you?” you ask in an attempt to shift the spotlight away from yourself. jungwon pauses, and you can't tell if he's teasing you or if he's genuinely thinking about it. “what about me?” he responds. this cheeky fuckface. you have the strong urge to sock him in the stomach. “you like me? like, like? as in you wouldn’t mind holding my hand, or hugging me, or— other stuff…” other stuff? nice one.

“i thought it was pretty obvious that i like you too, yn.” jungwon huffs. your eyes widen so largely, you feel like they’re on the verge of bulging out of the sockets. he carefully takes a look at your face in amusement, and continues. “i like everything about you. i like how considerate you are, and how closely you pay attention to others. you have this comfortable presence that makes everyone around you feel at ease. thinking about you always puts this massive smile on my face and i absolutely love being with you, too.” jungwon’s sudden declaration of his feelings causes your entire body feels incredibly warm. it was almost as if someone lit a matchstick and set it ignite. you feel a swarm of butterflies consuming the space in your stomach. “jungwon, i—“

what about sunoo?

suddenly, you become incredibly conscious of the upright hair on your body as the follicles on your skin contract to form small goosebumps along your arms and legs. you’re looking for the right words to say but the growing lump wedged in your throat renders you speechless. you’re not plainly scared, you realize. you’re absolutely petrified. although a million thoughts rack your mind, the most prominent concern is whether you can pursue your feelings for jungwon with confidence knowing that it may hurt sunoo. all the pent-up ecstasy came to an instantaneous crash and burn with your next sentence. “but i feel guilty,” you whisper.

jungwon looks a little dazed, “guilty for what?” his voice is no louder than a whisper, his glistening eyes that shine vibrantly despite the dimmed twilight sky. “yn?” jungwon gently puts his hand on your shoulder, almost as if he’s attempting to rouse you out of your panicked distress. you feel yourself begin to shake. am i going to lose jungwon too? “i’m sorry. i thought i was ready to confront the situation. i guess this has been taking a bigger toll on me than i imagined.” you notice that jungwon has begun to study your expression. you have the urge to laugh off your tears and insist that you’re doing just about swimmingly, but you figure it’s a little too late to resort to that tactic. “it’s okay, take your time. there’s no rush, yeah?” you nod in response, “i’m sorry. i don’t really get myself right now, too. i’m all over the place — i mean, i just told you that i like you and now i’m crying my eyes out.”

you sigh. “i feel like i’m letting everyone down.” you fight back the plump, hot tears welling in the inner corners of your eyes. “i rejected sunoo the other day and i feel like shit. i don’t know, i don’t think i’m an angel or anything — but i thought that i was at least semi-perceptive of the people around me. i was so caught up with myself, i didn’t even realize that my best friend was hurting because of me. i just feel selfish, jungwon. i don’t know if i can be happy if it means it’ll be at the expense of sunoo’s happiness.” you had spent the past week supposedly reflecting on your own feelings, but you feel like you’ve been rudely shoved back to square one. all you can do is spew a bunch of self-deprecating crap and laugh bitterly.

“will you being unhappy make him any happier?” jungwon asks. you look up, eyes swollen nearly shut. you’re unable to answer. jungwon taps his chin, thoughtfully. “hear me out, okay? i’m not sunoo. so, i can’t really speak on his behalf, but he seems to cherish you a lot. i doubt someone who genuinely likes you would want you to feel this way. you aren’t at fault for not reciprocating his feelings, yn — you can’t control the way that you feel. you're trying to make all these sacrifices, but who exactly is going to benefit from them? it won't really change how you feel, or how sunoo feels. you're punishing yourself over something you have no real control over."

you allow his words to sink in. it feels like your face has been flushed with ice cold water. who exactly am i doing this for? you've been insistently reminding yourself it was for sunoo, but you're not so certain anymore. "sunoo... sunoo told me to still go after you, you know," you croak. "but even then, i still hesitated. i kept imagining our friendship as some scale; he always goes out of his way for me, so i should try and do something for him for once. if there was some sort of balance, maybe things would go back to normal. i never realized how counterproductive this would all be." you wipe your tears with the hem of your sleeve. "in some shitty way, maybe i'm just doing all of this to lift my sense of guilt for not being a better friend to sunoo. i felt so bad for not realizing that he had feelings for me, so i tried to make up for my mistakes even without him asking me. i’m overcompensating like an idiot.” you sigh, deeply. it wouldn’t change his feelings— nor would it change your lack thereof. "everyone has flaws, yn. you're not any less susceptible to them. that doesn’t make you an idiot. still, there are better ways to deal with this. ways that don't consist of you beating yourself up. you can't force your friendship with sunoo to go back to normal or turn back time— but you can try to mend things when he's ready. even then, i doubt sunoo is really upset at you. everyone seems like they just want to see you happy — including me."

“i know. i’m sorry i dragged you into this stupid mess.” jungwon sternly turns his head from side-to-side. “don’t apologize to me, yn," he replies. "i'm always here for you…” jungwon pauses mid-sentence. “but don't get me wrong or anything. i’m not saying all of this stuff to push you into starting something with me,” he adds. jungwon scratches the nape of his neck, and looks away. though, you can still spot the reddening tips of his ears. “let’s just take this at your pace. i don’t want to rush you into something that you aren’t prepared for. even if you decide that you don’t want to pursue anything more with me — i just want to see you prioritize your own happiness for once.”

“have you always been like this?” you ask. “like what?” jungwon looks puzzled, and you think his expression is pretty damn endearing. “patient. i mean, i kind of ghosted you without much explanation for a week — and now you’re offering to give me more time. aren’t you frustrated?” jungwon chortles in response. “jay usually tells me that i’m the impatient type,” he admits, sheepishly. “but i can wait if it’s for you. just promise to continue texting me and stuff — just so i know that you’re alive, of course.”

you roll your eyes. “yeah, i promise.” you smile and he grins back.

almost as if the universe had comedically planned it in advance, your phone loudly chimes to the tune of kara’s honey. way to ruin the moment. you shuffle through your pockets, cursing at the conveniently terrible timing of your alarm. “shit, i gotta go. it’s almost curfew.” you aggressively slam your finger onto the snooze button, and quickly stand up. “i can walk you,” jungwon insists. “no, it’s alright. it’s super close by.” the jutted pout painted on jungwon’s lips makes you hesitant to leave. “we’ll see each other tomorrow on campus,” you remind him.

“i know.” jungwon shuffles from foot to foot. “see you tomorrow, then?” you quickly nod in response, “text me when you get home. bye, jungwon!” he waves, and you begrudgingly rush back to your dormitory. on your way back, you’re unable to beat the idiotically wide grin plastered across your face.

you deem that no matter how hard you resist the urge to fall for yang jungwon, he, along with his stupid dimpled smile, have already captured your heart.

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆.    ever since the day you accidentally screwed over yang jungwon’s course selection during freshmen year, you were pretty sure the guy disliked (if not absolutely hated) you. after several failed, uncomfortable attempts to get jungwon to forgive you, you settled that it would be much easier if the feelings remained mutual. thus, you avoided him at all costs! you treated him as if he had something along the lines of a nasty case of the bubonic plague. surprisingly, it went pretty well… until you ended up seated next to yang jungwon in a cramped lecture hall. oh boy, did i mention that you also have a group project to do with him? ah yes, these next three weeks will be fun.

𝗮𝗻.               we got some communication (finally) hope you guys enjoyed this extra long chapter !! 😝😝

𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁        @xoxojayd3n @cosmiclele @echelhoops @chimiesspeach @yjwooon @yangyanghq @lumixen @instahann @sleepy-paws @plshhhhhhh @ncityy04 @n1k1tty @wonionie @youreverydayzebra @reallysmolrenjun @strawberryyukhei @studioreader @clear-colour-hair @alo-ehas @hobistigma @notrosemary @sunysunoo @whoe-dis @jayparkfromenhypen @k1ttyl1x @mikaa7 @ivswonie @ghjasksdk @enhyseob @jungw8ns @thekinkpopstandsforkrackheads @jooreneeee @april1538 @creamkwan @tlnyjoong @yenart @shotasgf @uhhalexwashere @ilyaera @lyra8 @wonietree @shawkneecaps @raindropsandroses1107 @curryramyeon @rikibae @jaemsluvr @jakesahi @papiibuprofen @milkycloudtyg @aernx [ re-opened ] ────────── [ 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘃. | 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁. | 𝗺.𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ] ───

[blackevermore]

x Secrets of The Lake: The Company of Misery and Pain ( Also on A03)

{ Chapter 17 }

Summary: Vladimir Masters’ family tree has always been tainted by secrets swept under the rug. From generation to generation there have been countless reasons the Masters’ family had seemed to keep private from the public. Even to this day, Vladimir was no exception. But what was one to do when a restless spirit from the settlement years finally breaks free from restraints and demands you answer for your ancestor’s crimes? Vladimir doesn’t know. However, Clockworks does.

Notes: We just having fun, rewriting some of the canon, new adventure new characters. I will apologize now for any grammar, spelling, weird sentence structuring in advance. My brain writes faster than my fingers and even when I go back through to reread it I still miss things. Sorry about that!

Word Count: 4.2K

P.s: Chapters will be taking longer to get out which means they will get longer to read as well

The art of fatherhood was different for everyone, some would treat it as a goal that had to be achieved, others would scoff at the idea of ever having a small being having to rely on them, and then there were the golden few who genuinely want the honour of being called someone's dad. Vlad had found himself transforming from the first version to the last in a matter of years and at times it was still too surreal for him. He cheated himself out of having the infant years when he created Dani, in a way he was grateful he didn’t have to do diapers. He refuses to be envious of Jack for that. However, he lacked the time and the patience the infant years gave you when your child turned into a teenager. Danny was his first go around and that was hell on wheels considering Vlad took every chance he got to spite the boy. Over time he had become the fabric of Danny's growth as a young man and had even given a few pointers on how to handle certain situations. In a way he had gotten that fatherly relationship with Danny, maybe not in the best way (or the way he wanted) but it was there.

Here he was fussing over Dani making sure she was packed for the summer. Making sure she had her necessary items that he deemed important: her phone, her laptop, four pairs of shoes, necessary summer clothes, his antighost technology that was oh so better than Jack’s (and worked), her house keys just in case ( not that she actually needs them), and finally the emergency credit card that she would need to text Kate to use. Vlad had no idea why he behaved like this when Dani had spent countless times over at Danny’s family home. It was indeed her second home when Vlad was away on business. He was now becoming overbearing and trying to helicopter her. When Dani finally commented about it Vlad backed off and agreed with a distaste of himself.

The whole time he ran around his Minnesota home trying to make sure Dani was ready, Tayonna watched in the shadows at times laughing at Vlad's antics. He was much different than Vladan. Vlad was cool-headed to an extent that prevented anyone from seeing him when he was in distress. The man could be juggling the world on the tip of his fingers and he would make it look effortless. He carried himself with an eerie confidence that made people move out of his way and he commanded with ease. Vlad had mean eyes that only softened to things he deemed worthy and even then they still demanded respect. Vlad spoke clearly, with overly over-enunciated vowels and sometimes lingered on sounds with a hiss like a snake. Vladan was Vlad's polar opposite who hunched at the idea of unnecessary conflict. Vladan, despite his frown brows and hooded pale wolf eyes, was soft on the inside. All of the possible intimidating nature Vladan could muster was surface level, once you got past that he was simply a man with a big heart. He only showed a sign of authority when faced with an opposing manner. Vlad was a single shade of red while Vladan was shades of blue that fluctuated daily. Vlad held the room by its neck, Vladan lurked in the back, and yet they both equally wanted nothing more than to go home.

Tayonna found herself admiring Vlad outside of the striking resemblance he held with Vladan. It was like she was meeting a stranger who read the same poem but in a different cadence. Within the month and few weeks she was here she would describe him like a cat. White and fluffy but very much untouchable purring around with pompous behaviour in an obnoxious way that was almost laughable. Yet at times when Vlad was being a father to Dani, Tayonna could only imagine Vladan doing the same. Fussing over his daughter, driving manners into their possible son, and complaining about how tired he was after everything. 

This world was so much different than when she was alive. The first was that people like her roamed freely with no one to answer to. Next women held more power than just being at home, they worked, they owned, and they were able to do just the same as their male counterparts if not better—lastly, pants. Tayonna was so surprised that women could wear pants, no one cared, and no one yelled or screamed about how evil it was that women and young girls could wear them as well. When Tayonna saw Dani running about in pants she had almost the nerve to say something. But Vlad didn’t have an issue with it so it must have been okay. The few times Tayonna looked out the windows and saw people walking by she damn near felt like she was peeping at naked people. This was so different. So abnormal. She had been in her domain for years on end, with no interaction outside of the red mist, no possible way of knowing what the living world was like. When she haunted Vlad she did in the comfort of what she knew. Now that she was here she was more scared of the moving world than the fact Vlad looked like Vladan. 

“Tayonna.” Vlad walked past the doorway into the living room. Tayonna was near the bay window enjoying the sun.

“Yes?” She responded.

“I’m going to leave now and drop Danielle off. When I come back I will begin packing myself and we will be leaving to go to my other house.” Vlad said, rolling up his dress shirt and smoothing out his hair. Tayonna looked him over then gave him a hum of acknowledgement. Vlad told himself to walk away but the sight in front of him was statuesque. Tayonna sat along the window seat with a knee tucked under her chin, her wild curls were held back by a scarf but sprayed around her in a halo of kinks. She was in her human complexion and the sun made her brown skin glow with a honey hue. The contradiction of her dated clothing against modern architecture paved a deeper meaning between life as it was and life now. She looked like an artist's thesis statement that life lingers even in white walls and grey scaling. 

‘ She’s always been beautiful ’ Vladan thought.

Indeed, Vlad agreed.

Vlad couldn’t believe he was agreeing with the voice inside his head. Of course, Tayonna was charming to look at with her raw beauty which was much different than women today. But he could not tiptoe around the line of possibly finding her attractive. She was a ghost, an intruder who came into his life like a fist to the face, he could not allow his curiosity to be tainted by someone else's feelings or even his loneliness.

“Do you need something, Sir?” Tayonna brought Vlad out of his thoughts causing him to blush. The way she called him Sir made a funny feeling rattle in his chest and he liked it. Vlad liked the formality in the suggestive nature, it was almost like a game of power and control. He knew she didn’t mean it in such a way but rather to be polite but oh the way his heart skipped at the sound of it. He hoped she would do it more often if she was going to be around. Vlad quickly cleared his throat and tried to calm himself down by turning away from her and raising a hand to dismiss himself.

“Nothing, I shall be back and then we will leave.” Vlad was quickly out of the house towards the car where Dani waited with headphones on and her feet on the dash.

“Make sure you eat!” Vlad yelled out the window.

“Why wouldn’t I eat?” Dani yelled back.

“I don’t know, Jack’s cooking is questionable.”

“Well, mom will likely be the one cooking.”

“You’d be surprised, she’s not much of a cook either.”

“I heard that!” Maddie yelled from the door and Vlad couldn’t help but laugh.

“Am I lying? Or do I need to recall our time in Jack’s dorm where you nearly set the whole building on fire making pasta?” Vlad smirked and Maddie gave him a very motherly disappointed look of ‘Why would you bring that up’ before she rolled her eyes and huffed out a chuckle.

“Alright, be safe, call me later.” Vlad turned his gaze back towards his daughter and Dani nodded eager for him to finally pull off.

“Take care, Madeline, I’ll see you all before Daniel leaves for college.” Vlad waved as he pulled off and busted a U-turn to head back towards his house. He was barely down the road when his phone began to ring through the whole car.

“Masters.” He answered.

“Good morning, Sir. Is now a good time?” Kate sounded airy as if she was outside.

“It’s as good as it gets, you’ve been missing in action for a while.” Vlad was snappy. Kate had been gone for a while, no text, no call, not even an email informing him of any update. Surely the woman remembered she was meant to be on a business trip, not some crazy extended vacation.

“I’m in Germany,” Kate responded simply.

“What in the heavens are you doing in Germany?!” Vlad's brows knotted and he huffed out a fit of air. She was doing this on his time.

“Jackson and I got to Pennsylvania and were able to pull the records, however-”

“However?” Vlad's brow rose.

“However, the records showed that, yes, you had family that dealt in the colonies but business was managed across seas. The name associated is not Vladan; it was under a man named Tillman who was listed as head of state up until Anya-Tillman Mægisters was listed as a successor.”

“Yes! Anya was the father of Vladan.” Vlad became excited as the pieces started to fall into place. Finally some good news!

“Yes, I found that as well but Vladan does not seem to take on the family business after his father’s passing. The business was dissolved due to lack of resources and funds.” Kate paused as if she was flipping through a book. 

“The last mention of his existence is one official marriage certificate in the Germanic state to an Odo, and a previous betrothal while in the colonies to a Phoebe Speldercast.” 

“Don’t you ever say that name again!” Vlad's voice boomed through the car with a heavy bass that rocked the car’s interior. This made him swerve off to the side of the road and slam on his breaks. His grip on the wheel was tight and his hands began to glow as his powers activated. His chest became tight and his eyes flashed completely red and a fit of rage sideswiped him before sizzling out and bringing him back. Vladan’s mist began to rise from his arms and Vlad had to take a deep breath to gain control of his body. He looked up in the rearview mirror and Vladan stared back like an unhinged man ready to attack. Vlad could feel Vladan tussling within his mind and the man only seemed to get angrier. The phantom closed his eyes and mentally blocked out the angered spirit until he was sure he wouldn’t break loose again. 

The car was silent and Vlad knew that Kate was likely just as speechless on the other side of the phone.

“Kate I dearly apologize, I’ll have to call you back.” Vlad didn’t wait for a response and quickly hung up on his assistant. Vlad turned back towards the rearview mirror and saw Vladan was still there with the craziest set of eyes and his face turning red. 

“Did that hit a nerve?” Vlad asked sarcastically out loud.

“She’s the devil who took everything away from me.” Vladan was no longer an echo in Vlad's head. His voice was clear and accented.

“Can you possibly tell me anything about her?” If this was the lead Vlad needed then by god was he going to take it. 

“She was a witch,” Vladan spat back.

“Was she crucified?” Vlad didn’t want to sit here and pull teeth. This isn't even his problem and yet it seemed he couldn’t get answers to fix it. 

“No,” Vladan responded defeated and Vlad sighed. Finally, he could feel his body become his again as he unclasped his hands from the wheel and then grumbled when he saw the leather was scarred. 

“Tayonna can’t remember anything that happened, if there is anything you can offer I would gladly appreciate it.” Vlad looked away from the mirror and towards his side mirrors to see if anyone was coming. When he saw it was clear he pulled back onto the road. Vladan had yet to respond and Vlad took a quick glance to look in the mirror. Vladan was gone and Vlad slapped his palm against the wheel in frustration.

~~~

“Sir?” Kate answered the phone hesitantly and Vlad cringed in the reminder of earlier.

“I do apologize for earlier Miss Way, no, I can not explain myself but trust me when I say I have no idea either.” Vlad paused.

“Apology accepted,” Kate responded and Vlad let out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding. 

“Wonderful, I have a new name I need you to look into, Phoebe Speldercast, which you had mentioned earlier. My records do not mention her at all and I’m starting to believe it is for a reason.” Vlad huffed about his room putting together a suitcase and snapping his fingers for the ghost maids to appear and handle the rest.

“Why are we doing this again, Sir?” Kate seemed to snap back to her normal personality and Vlad was glad.

“It seems I have more family issues than I’m comfortable discussing.” Vlad let out an ironic chuckle and Kate responded with a ‘hah’ and then told him she would look into it before hanging up. Vlad threw his phone on the bed and then plopped down to sit, he held his head in his hands, ran his fingers through his silver hair and pulled out the ponytail. This was exhausting and he still had the stuff to do before the day was over. He felt like every time he got closer to finding out something both Tayonna and Vladan left him crumbs to work with. He hadn’t heard from Clockwork since Tayonna arrived and that made him feel more abandoned than ever. Then again, he didn’t expect much help from the timekeeper anyway. Clockwork was a very hands-off sort of being that already knew the answers but wanted you to figure it out by yourself. Sure he gave you a clue but said clue would only be good for five seconds before the mystery continued to unravel into turmoil. 

This was beginning to feel like the summer was going to drag and the small idea of any vacation Vlad had planned would be thrown away. Vlad sat up straight and peered ahead, he caught sight of himself in his full-length mirror and duly noted his appearance. Still handsome, still him, still had dark circles under his eyes he was sure were permanent, and still had that strip of black hair that came out of nowhere. He touched his jaw and thought how under all the facial hair he grew was a baby face that would give it away he wasn’t actually in his forties. No longer ageing at an appropriate rate was a blessing just as much as it was a curse. That’s why he never shaved more than he should. He felt the pricks of his beard coming in and made a note to sharpen up when he got to Wisconsin. As he continued to make note of his face a red mist left his lips and he looked over his shoulder to see Tayonna standing in the door.

“That name,” Tayonna began. “I don’t like that name.”

Vlad hummed and turned around, “Nor does he.” Vlad felt his hand twitch a few times as Vladan tried to get him to reach out to the woman. Vlad told him to stop and Tayonna tilted her head as she heard him. Vlad noticed she started to walk toward him, she was cautious as she stood beside him and slowly brought her hand up to push back a few loose strands of hair. Vlad stayed still, he didn’t want to scare her with any sudden movement. This was the closest they had been since he removed the collar from her neck. He felt his heart flutter when she moved her hand down to cup his face. His core burned for a moment then settled again when she removed her hand. 

“She was a nasty woman, she wanted him all to herself.” Tayonna backed away to put distance between them again. “I don’t remember anything else. I feel like every time I try to think about my life I have nothing. Except him.” Tayonna bit her lip and hung her head.

Vlad shot to his feet and pulled the girl into a tight hug. When they touched their cores vibrated against each other making their owners shiver. Tayonna brought her arms up and wrapped around Vlad in a way only a lover would. Vlad bit down his discomfort from knowing it wasn't for him and just allowed the two souls to interact. He felt left out strangely despite being the owner of the body. Tayonna wasn’t holding him, he told himself, she was feeling Vladan and likely reminiscing on what it once felt like to hold her old lover. He knew that's what Vladan wanted, it was why Vlad was currently holding the girl like his life depended on it. Vlad told himself to be content and to not bring his own emotions into this. Was the situation fucked up, yes, was there anything else he could do, not really. 

If he tried to fight Vladan’s impulses then there was no telling what the soul inside him would do next. He didn’t want to imagine it either. 

“Go to sleep,” Tayonna whispered into Vlad’s shoulder then placed her hand in the middle of his back. A surge of energy shot through Vlad and right to the middle of his core making it pulse a few times then willow into a slumber. Vlad felt the heat that normally flows through his body come to a chill, making his teeth chatter. Tayonna was the first to pull away but not completely out of the embrace. She looked into Vlad’s eyes and held him there for a moment as if trying to see if Vladan was still around.

“I apologize,” Tayonna shifted on her feet and then settled back into Vlad’s arms.

“It’s alright, I’ll heat back up” Vlad's voice cracked a bit as he settled his core and the unbelievably cold chill coursing through him.

“ Not for that,” Tayonna corrected him.

“Then for what?” Vlad's brow rose.

“You are not held often, you crave it more than he does and he uses that against you. He is smart.” Tayonna finally removed her arms from around Vlad and tugged a bit to break his hold. Vlad awkwardly let her go and that sparked something inside him when he lost her touch. Vlad could have been annoyed knowing that Vladan had triggered something like that inside him. But he was too tired to care, too tired to fight back and honestly just wanted another hug as it was. 

“He is a nuisance.”  Vlad finally straightened himself and pushed back his hair to put it back into a ponytail. Tayonna reached out a hand and pulled at his forearm to stop him.

“You need to let your hair down. Relax more, as best as you can, that is.” Tayonna nodded then walked out of the room and off somewhere in the house. 

Vlad clenched his fist then shook out his hands as he closed his eyes and thought for a moment.

“This is ridiculous,” Vlad grumbled.

“She’s getting comfortable around you.” Vladan's voice came from behind Vlad causing the man to jump a bit and turn around. The spirit was reflected in the mirror on Vlad’s bed with a very tired expression almost as if he was about to pass out. Vlad was silently pleased to know Tayonna’s powers finally zapped the other into calming down and being out of the way.

“I wouldn’t say that when you don’t seem to know when to settle down. Seems like she’s trying to keep you away from her.” Vlad didn’t mean to say the last part, it came out on its own, and he didn’t try to apologize for saying it. Vladan didn’t seem to take offence mostly due to being tired (or not hearing it). Vladan did however manage to bring his face up to stare Vlad deep to his core and it made the phantom stiffen.

“Some of this isn’t me,” Vladan let out a yawn and blinked his eyes a few times. His head lulled to the side and he caught it in his hand. “You have strong emotions buried inside you. They trigger me just as much as they trigger you. You’re lonely.��� With that, Vladan vanished and Vlad knew he was utterly alone in the bedroom once again. 

Vlad knew he had some emotions buried deep that he chose not to deal with. It was better that way, especially with his newfound path towards not being the villain in everyone’s story. They were emotions that kept him the way he was for years and only recently was he able to shift his focus. His loneliness wasn't completely cured. Where he was able to make it with having his own Frankenstein family he still longed for someone to share it with. He wanted a partner and Vlad wasn’t sure what the hell Vladan was getting at when he said Tayonna could help. Tayonna was Vladan’s ghostly lover who just a few weeks ago was on a rampage and is now being civil. Vlad liked them crazy but not that crazy.

~~~

Tayonna was not okay with going back into the Ghost Zone. The sheer thought of going back made her think that at any moment she might be sucked back into the hidden world she was kept in and imprisoned. She had managed to escape and find Vlad by following his trail of ectoplasm that fell from his wound. She had lost the trail halfway through and saw random ghosts entering and exiting out of a portal and chose to follow it blindly. Lucky for her it was the right way to go, but now she wasn’t too sure she could handle stepping back into the green void she knew had no ending or beginning. 

“Tayonna, come along.” Vlad’s black rings crossed over his body turning him into Plasmius. The woman forgot he could change his appearance just like her. Vlad had been human for so long that she flinched a bit when he turned around to look back at her. Vlad looked around to see what made her jump then laughed.

“You copy my powers and forget where you got them from?” He teased and Tayonna huffed and rolled her eyes. 

“Come now, it’s only 10 minutes from here and I much rather settle in before mid-afternoon.” Vlad walked over to the computer that was connected to his ghost portal and typed in something that made the machine come to life and the doors slowly open. A mist of fog rolled in as the bitter chill of the Ghost Zone filled the room and then the harsh glow of neon green. The machine’s main clock above the portal began a countdown of thirty seconds. Vlad wasted no time in flying into the portal but when he felt a pull on his core alerting him of Tayonna he turned to look over his shoulder. 

She stood on the edge of the portal looking down into the Ghost Zone and then shaking her head and stepping back. Vlad tsked and knew that his portal would close in just a few seconds if she didn’t hurry up. He quickly rushed back, took the girl's hand and pulled her into his body as he floated back up just as the door was closing.

“Forgot how to fly already?” Vlad teased her again, hoping that whatever was making her nervous would subside. Tayonna said nothing as her black rings formed around her waist and transformed her into her ghost form. She pulled away from him but held onto his hand as they floated in place for a bit.

“I don’t like it here, it feels like a prison.” Tayonna squeezed Vlad’s hand and he could tell that she needed the comfort right now. He was a gentleman before anything else and he firmly made sure she knew he wasn’t going to let her go.

“Well, actually the prison is that way. The Ghost Zone, within limitations, is a wonderland of free will.” With that Vlad pulled her along so they could start their travels and Tayonna kept close. A feeling told her that something lurked around them and as much as she thought she could defend herself if need be, Vlad would certainly be of great help. Vlad could sense it too, not from his core but in general, something was watching them and he didn’t have the time to stop and figure it out.

“He was never here.” Tayonna broke the silence after a while of flying and that caught Vlad’s curiosity.

“The Ghost Zone?” He responded. How in the world would someone dead not be in the Ghost Zone? Of course, Vlad had heard of some ghost crossing over but that was only to those that had nothing to be restless over. All the ghosts here had something they refused to let go over. Love, revenge, anger, hell even the children's pride of innocence. All the ghosts that could be accounted for in the zone were people who had something that didn’t allow them to move on. From what Vlad understood from both ghosts that now haunted him, they should have been stuck in here for years.

“I never felt him lingering around. Even when I left the water and found you I could never feel him here.” Tayonna said.

“Wasn’t he just mist?” Vlad asked, he was sure that Vladan’s embodiment of the red floating mist would be enough to trigger a ghost's senses. Then again he never sensed him, despite being in his body he could never tell when Vladan was around, only Tayonna.

“That’s not his ghost,” Tayonna pulled closer to Vlad when they flew past another ghost who paid them no mind. “He has no physical form, that's why he is nothing but air. He is nothing but an imprint.” Tayonna sounded hurt to say that. 

‘She took my body’ Vladan spoke in Vlad’s mind. He sounded very drowsy as if he was still fighting the sleep that Tayonna put him in.

‘Who’ Vlad thought back.

‘The witch’ Vladan went silent again and Vlad felt an overbearing feeling of dread tickle his core. Tayonna felt it too and huffed, shaking her head as if she was annoyed by it. Vlad gave her a look and Tayonna silently acknowledged it.

“He feels dread.” Tayonna knew it was pointless to get worked up but the unknown anger she had against Vladan was still there. Even if she couldn’t remember why she was upset with him, that didn’t stop her from expressing it. Vlad's core rocked back and forth between the two emotions and he stopped flying and let go of Tayonna's hand.

“Stop it, both of you, this is still my body and still my mind at times. I would like not to have to feel his emotions and yours reacting at a constant back and forth. It’s draining me.” Vlad felt the both of them become remorseful and he knew it was best to just forgive them so he could get to where he was going. Tayonna didn’t try to take his hand and flew a few paces behind him. Their trip was over when they made it to a giant castle-like door and Vlad tapped on his wrist to unlock it. 

He landed and then held out his hand for Tayonna to take, once they were both inside the new house Tayonna looked around amazed at the change of scenery.

“You live in a castle?” Tayonna walked over to study the old bricks along the dungeon-like wall. Despite being turned into a lab for Vlad's ghostly needs he kept the castle like decor. The walls were the old bricks from when the manor was first built, thick pillars lined along the structure that kept the foundation of the house. Vlad even decorated with a few old nick nacks around on the shelves and an old suit of armour near the portal door. It may have been the Dairy King's home once but that didn’t mean he couldn’t fashionably love dairy.

“It’s a bit small for a castle but nonetheless it was built for a sort of king,” Vlad smirked. Tayonna looked around more and then came back to stand beside Vlad with her hands behind her back.

“What are your rules?” Vlad was confused then remembered that while they were at his other home he made clear his do's and don’ts. He thought for a moment then shrugged. 

“We are far from the city and my neighbours are a mile away. You are free to do as you please within reason. As we know when you stray too far you get hurt so let's try to avoid that. You are free to do as long as you are in my company.” Tayonna's eyes lit up with excitement and she smiled. The flutter of happiness Vlad felt made him smile as well and he felt his heart skip. Tayonna's smile was indeed something he had never seen before and he hoped to see it again now that she didn’t have boundaries. It was his main reason for buying the manor for himself years ago. It gave him the ability to do his ghostly needs. 

His Minnesota house was too close to other people. Anyone could look through his back windows and see him or Dani using their powers no matter how hard he tried to block them out. Hell, at one point Mrs Welmsworth began peeping into his garden when he planted new flowerbeds and almost caught him using his powers in the kitchen. When he came back to Wisconsin he really did let loose and allow his ghostly behaviors to get the best of him. Since he worked from home no one could bother him when he just wanted to be blue. Or maybe his eyes were being funky and were stuck red for a day, or his fangs wouldn’t retract, or simply he just wanted to be Plasmius. At times he was sure Plasmius was his own person just as much as he was an ego.

“Would you like a tour?” Vlad gestured around them and Tayonna shook her head no before turning back into her human form and floating up through the floor. Vlad nodded and went about calling for the ghost maids to make sure they had brought over his stuff. When he left the basement, he was right next to the kitchen and heard the sound of pots and pans moving around. He checked his watch and saw that it was only 3 pm, a bit too early for anyone to be making dinner, let alone be in the kitchen when it was just him and Tayonna there. He strongly hoped it wasn’t the Dairy King, said ghost had a bad habit of forgetting he wasn’t the owner anymore and there wouldn’t be random things of dairy products lying around. 

Vlad peeked into the kitchen and watched as Tayonna swirled her hands around flicking open cabinets and drawers and pulling out cooking utensils. Some he didn’t even know he had stored away since he didn’t do much cooking when he was here.

Tayonna felt at home in the large kitchen, there was space for her to float off the ground and quickly move around to snoop through Vlad’s things. The reason she had even started in the kitchen was when she saw the old style stove that looked like it hadn’t been used in years, it brought her back to her years being alive. She didn’t need to eat but the call to be crafty pulled her in and she began her attack on wanting to make something. Vlad was impressed with how natural she seemed in the kitchen. 

“Sugar, flour, butter, and if there are berries, bring them here,” Tayonna said, clapping her hands and watching the room come to life as the fridge opened and the butter flew out, the cabinets opened and flour and sugar floated towards her. She pointed to the large island next to her and the items gently placed themselves down. When berries did not appear Tayonna looked around then saw a lonely plant pot tucked behind a few books. She snapped her fingers for the pot to move and once it was in her hands she placed her hands in the dirt and mumbled a few words then watched as a small berry bush sprouted.

Vlad was more than impressed, she could conjure things by simply asking for them aloud, he wished he had that ability, maybe he could ask her how she did it or even better yet, learn to copy her ability to copy others. He wouldn’t mind being lazy and calling for something to come flying towards him. Then again that’s what the ghost maids were for. Vlad leaned against the kitchen archway and watched on as Tayonna set to work making dough with her powers adding in the berries before turning around to turn on the stove. 

“Open the window and bring me wood.” Tayonna commanded and the window towards the patio door opened and the snapping of tree branches caught Vlad’s ear. When they floated into the kitchen Tayonna pointed to the small door under the stovetop and it opened for the wood to rest inside. She then stuck out a finger and shot a blast of lighting to start the fire. Vlad knew it would take a while for the stove to heat up but the girl didn’t care and placed her hand on the iron rack in the main part of the stove to heat it. Within a few minutes, Tayonna was starting up something else and the kitchen was once again back to life. 

Vlad noticed when Tayonna stopped and became interested in the sound system near the end of the counter. She was like a baby animal picking and poking at the item. He would have to teach her eventually simple technology so she wouldn’t break anything. 

Tayonna finally poked enough that she hit the on button and rock music began to blare out the speakers. She jumped back out of fear and gasped, the music seemed like it was coming from all directions and that was terrifying, she covered her ears and stood back. Vlad quickly ran over and turned it off and finally broke the laughter he was holding in. Tayonna's brows knotted and she pointed towards the sound system in disgust.

“It’s a sound system, like a radio, or a music box,” Vlad said, still trying to choke back a chuckle.

“That is not a music box, that is a bunch of noise clashing together.” Tayonna frowned and shook her head.

“That my dear is AC/DC, which may I say is not just a bunch of noise but a rock classic.” Vlad crossed his arms over his chest and leaned on one leg. “And may I ask what you are doing in the kitchen?” He swirled a finger around gesturing to the pots and pans and food lying around.

“You said I could do as I please.” Tayonna retorted.

“And you can, but I’m still the owner of this house and I can still ask you what you are doing.” Vlad smirked and that seemed to ease Tayonna.

“I’m making something-”

“Bunt Berry Cake, you know how much I love it.” Vlad and Tayonna stared at each other as the awkwardness between them grew. Vlad mentally told Vladan to shut the hell up, then coughed apologizing, Tayonna nodded her head and cleaned her hands off on her dress.

“I’m sure you’ll like it just as much as he does.” Tayonna laughed and Vlad’s expression softened at the gentle sound of her voice.

“I hope so or I’m going to be very upset.” Vlad said, slightly flirtatiously.

“I’m rather skilful with cooking so I promise you’ll like it, Sir.” Tayonna smiled.

And there it was again, Sir , Vlad’s weakness that made his lip ends twitch into a smile.

“Then I can’t wait,” Vlad winked at Tayonna which made the girl blush unbeknownst to him as he walked away and out of the kitchen. Around the corner, Vlad was mentally kicking himself and blaming Vladan for his sudden flirty behaviour.

It truly was going to be a long summer.

[nerdylike]

Bittersweet Goodbyes / Roseblings

With Gemini and FWhip Tay’s parents ruling over Grimlands, the twins have always been together for as long as they can remember.

Even though Gem was the “rightful” heir according to the law, she knew their parents wanted FWhip as their heir. One of the reasons for FWhip being preferred as heir is the fact that he loved Grimlands, from its landscape to its fishy animals. Gem, on the other hand, loved the greenery and magic.

Though that’s also due to Gem telling her parents that she would not give up learning magic. Ever since, the two parents were strict on Gem, for Grimlands never really liked magic. That leads them to many arguments until one heated argument finally hits both the parents to kick Gem out of the mansion.

“Gem, wait! Maybe I can still talk to them about not getting you kicked out.” FWhip followed Gem as they entered their room.

“FWhip, you heard our parents, I’m being kicked out and given the time to pack and say goodbyes.” Gem quickly kneels down to grab something under her purple and white bed.

“Gem, please, I know I can convince them otherwise, so let’s go down and talk with them again.” FWhip tries to persuade Gem.

Gem sighed as she pulls out a green bag under her bed, “FWhip, I’m so, so sorry. I don’t want to leave you but I have no choice. Besides, you knew I was planning on leaving at night had they not kicked me out earlier.”

“Then let me come with you!” FWhip volunteered, becoming more desperate.

“FWhip, no, our parents won’t and I don’t want to be blamed for ‘dragging’ you with me, plus, what will you be doing while I study magic?” Gem reasoned, opening the cabinet to get more of her clothes.

“I can study how to make better inventions-”

“The best education for those is here, FWhip, in Grimlands. They’re offering a scholarship for you here. Your future is better here. Plus, we’ll have to work on part-time jobs and I won’t be able to be there when you get into trouble.” Gem turned around to face FWhip, cutting him off mid-sentence.

As Gem grabbed some clothes and shoves it down her bag, FWhip looks down as he ran his hands to his hair, “I don’t want to lose you, Gem” he mumbled.

Gem paused. She knew FWhip overheard her when she plans on leaving. She also knew he would try to stop her if she attempted to leave.

That’s the only reason Gem never attempted to leave in the first place. She wouldn’t bring herself to face FWhip, no matter how much she planned. Even if she avoided him, she knew she wouldn’t forgive herself for not even saying goodbye to his twin brother.

She already finds leaving hard enough. She never considered that being kicked out and FWhip begging her to stay is harder.

Gem turned around, her heart being crushed as she saw FWhip’s eyes begin to water, “FWhip…” she whispered.

“Gem, please… don’t leave me. I don’t- I wouldn’t even know what the first thing to do-”

“FWhip. I’m sorry, truly I am. But you know I’ll never cooperate with our parents, not if it meant pushing down my passion or my abilities.” Gem apologized.

FWhip closed his hands, shaking, he knew Gem is right. He’s seen the happiness and wonder the day that Gem discovered she has more magic abilities, that she can study magic spells.

“I’ll write to you, every time I’m in a new place, what happened to me while I’m studying, I’ll even tell you the inventors I met along the way. I promised you, FWhip, you won’t lose me.” Gem stepped closer to him.

FWhip felt something being wrapped around his neck. He opened his eyes to see a red scarf. He looked up at Gem, bewildered.

“Gem, but this is- This is your favorite scarf knitted by Grandma. I’m not-”

“I told you, you wouldn’t lose me, right? You see, you definitely won’t lose me.” Gem sadly smile.

“Ok, fine,” FWhip gave up, “just… promise me you’ll stay safe, and no lover without my permission.” FWhip joked on the last part, sort of.

Gem chuckled, “Y’know I’ll only be studying, right?”

“Yeah, I just want to make sure we’re clear on that.” FWhip elaborated.

Gem saw what FWhip was trying to do and decides to tease him, “Aw… is my little brother worried about me?”

“Of course, I’d be worried and it’s by four minutes, Gem! Four!” FWhip admits.

“At least I’m older than you.”

“At least I don’t wear big hats!”

“They’re not that big, you know that!”

The two stared at each other and laughed at their banter.

FWhip moved to hug Gem, which Gem obliged immediately, hugging him harder.

“I’m gonna miss you Gem…”

“I’m going to miss you too, FWhip.”

The two stayed like that for a while. Comfortable with the silence.

Knock, knock…

“Lady Gemini Tay, your parents are getting impatient. Sir FWhip Tay, you will be late for your private lessons with xxxxxxxxx.”

“Goodbye Gem…”

“Goodbye FWhip.”

The two pulled away from each other and went out of their room. It will be many years until they see each other again but they’re both willing to wait.

[violetren]

Ok live action atla reaction for episode 2.

It was better than episode one. Where episode one was a dumpster fire actively trying to hurt me both as an avatar fan and as someone with a basic understanding of how multimodal media is used to craft stories, episode two is fine.

I hesitate to call it great or even good when my only other point of reference so far is one of the worst episodes of TV I have seen in the past decade. Or possibly just ever. But I can comfortably say it was fine.

Perhaps my biggest on going issue is still the dialogue. When they don't sound like they just walked out of a LA therapists office, they instead sound like they are either in a circa 2010 disney original tv show, or just straight up like the writer explaining directly to camera how they are justifying skipping events from the animation because they have made the characters so much more mature and self aware of what they need to do/become for the sake of saving the world.

In short, Sokka remains unfunny.

I can't believe the "I bet you taste like chicken" comment wasn't even in response to Momo doing anything in particular. Momo is just there chilling on Aang's shoulder and Sokka is glaring at him like Momo is his arch rival, talking about a singular non mishmash animal that he has probably never even seen before because where the fuck where the chicken coops in the south fucking pole!?

Katara's strives in bending probably look impressive to anyone who hasn't seen the first episode of the animation where she already outclassed her current progress. Girl was out there (accidentally) splitting icebergs out of anger, but I'm meant to be impressed she can make a water ball in 3 seconds? I hate how badly she has been nerfed.

I also hate how they made it that Gram Gram actively helped nerf her by denying Katara her inheritance until it was clear she was gonna hop on a flying bison and go on adventures with the Avatar. She didn't even give her the scroll directly and apologise to her face. Just shoved it in her bags with a sorry note and now we're deprived of Katara stealing from pirates! Which means Katara is gonna be carrying that "goody toe shoes always morally correct with no room for nuance mom friend" burden for who knows how much longer now.

We did FINALLY get some Iroh adjacent behaviour from Uncle Iroh. Him trying to cajole Zuko into eating some street food and getting distracted mid sentence because he noticed some sticky rice wasn't perfectly executed but it was better executed than any other Iroh moments we have seen so far. Mostly he still hits as gaslighty and condescending. And don't get me wrong. OG Iroh COULD be gaslighty but never so fucking blatantly. There's no finesse, no gentle distractions layered with concern. Where is the charisma? Instead we effectively get him going "you're wrong. you should consider giving up." at every other time he talks to Zuko (less so this episode than last but only because he "tries" to teach Zuko diplomacy. Yes there are quotes around tries for a reason. He basically says Do This, gives no real guidance on how and then steps in to do the thing the second Zuko is sucking because he's never had to do this shit before and doesn't want to do it now especially since he has no idea wtf Iroh means).

Anyways, didn't they say they were overhauling the Ba Sing Se arc to make it less gaslighty? Yet they let this vibe fly with Iroh of all people?

We did at least get Suki though. And she's mostly pretty recognisably Suki. Save for the instant and hardcore pining for Sokka because he immediately became a surrogate for her yearning for the outside world. I can appreciate that they wanted to nix Sokka's sexism and instead just made him insecure about his status as a warrior, and they almost made it work but they cut themselves off from such an interesting interplay of tension by having Suki just as, if not more, eager to show off her skills to Sokka as he was to act like he was a big tough southern water tribe warrior. They were on to something when they had her question how he could be the guardian of his village if he was here with the Avatar instead. They could of had her be dismissive of his claims at being a warrior when he was clearly acting like an undisciplined blow hard and the fanthrowing/chokehold scene could have been a "stop acting tough, I am the warrior you're claiming to be" moment which wouldn't have involved any sexism on either side and have made a basis for mutual respect when Sokka comes along to the training hall. They could have had him humbly ASK instead of awkwardly miming until Suki noticed. We could have still had Sokka in Kyoshi Warrior garb. It would have stuck closer to the original, it wouldn't have taken up more time, and it would have created a much more satisfying interplay of tension between the two characters which also would help ground their future relationship in mutual respect.

I will say though, although the writing fucking choked the cinematography, the lighting team, the actors and the editors all came through with creating a sense of attraction between the two characters. So that wasn't nothing.

Kyoshi was a high point. Still fell victim to the dialogue writing, but a very strong perfomance by Yvonne Chapman accented excellently by the sound design team during some of the more intense parts when they layered in all the other Avatar voices. She was a good choice for giving Aang a bunch of hard truths and I liked how she both told him he had to find his own path but when he kept pushing for a more concrete answer just started telling him to deal with shit her way, because that felt very Kyoshi.

Also the entire sequence of her manifesting through Aang to show him a bit of what he could do as the avatar and lowkey to protect HER island was fucking badass. Not a single fire nation soldier left that island with clean underwear after facing Avatar mother fucking Kyoshi.

Unfortunately I was very quickly brought down from this high by Aang closing out his part of the episode by saying that Kyoshi told him something terrible was going to happen to the Northern Water Tribe if he didn't get up there and do his duty as the avatar to stop it. A conversation beat that happened off screen btw.

This annoys me for several reasons, starting with since when can the Avatar's collective past lives tell the future? The big threat to the Northern Water Tribe was originally Zhao coming to kill the moon spirit, which is a culmination of his lust for dominance and power and his plans to capture the avatar for himself. So either that isn't happening (and they are unnecessarily trying to revamp a perfectly good finale to stroke their own egos) OR they have made the nonsensical decision to foretell this tragedy in the show instead of just letting the tension mount naturally because 80+% of their audience already know shit goes down in at the Northern Water Tribe. Which annoys the fuck out of me. Aang was always going to go North for water bending training anyways, and especially this borderline hyper responsible version of Aang who knows even if it will hurt emotionally he will need to learn the other elements. There was no good god damn reason to add a second layer of urgency by saying if he doesn't get there bad shit will happen!

My closing rant is really more of a question, but why the fuck is it every time we see a firelord, (Sozin and now Ozai) that they are just hanging out in the middle of the fucking chamber chatting with some fucking guys until a prisoner/messenger arrives while the fire throne looms menacingly in the background upstairs and 50 feet back. Where is the menace and pizazz of them sitting looking down on literally everyone and everything from up on high flanked by flames, committing atrocities with a wave of their hand and a few low spoken words that everyone grovels to hear? I believe in Daniel Dae Kim's ability to look scary and lordly on a fancy chair, especially if the fancy chair has FIRE, why doesn't the director?

[mickgaydolenz]

so, i was reading 17° Aquarius which is what Micky's Mars is in and it was... interesting. i mean it's main theme is egotism and being dependent on others for stimulation; corruption and selfishness at its very worse. there's some merit to this but i only say that confidently because his Mars is in his 12H.

while the 4H represents the hidden life, and 8H represents the hidden mind, the 12H represents just being hidden in general; whether its abilities, emotions, opinions, the past, whatever is placed there. it's only accessed/activated -- other than for a profection year -- either willingly, or being forced to tap into it. especially so if there's aspects to it. it's also the last house which often represents endings and closure, answers given, and healing from old wounds.

majority of the time people will either totally ignore whatever's in this house or they'll escape into it to avoid reality. sure, you can ignore or run to your 12H placements for as long as you want, but they will always come back to bite you in the ass. everyone like's to throw karma around here, but that word has become so overused that it overtime lost it's original meaning, to which i cannot even define, as it's been bastardized to fit the white person's spiritual lexicon (thank you colonialism very cool /s). soooo a better way of describing this house is a house of personal retribution.

the reason im bringing this up is not to talk so much about Micky's 12H, since it's only his Mars there ...so sorry worldwide Micky girls nation <\3. although i will say, when i read "susceptibility to physically illness if frustrations grow intense" i got worried, so my eyes are closer than ever on that old man. watching him like a hawk as we speak.

i'm bringing this up because i've mentioned before about Mike's 12H and how that might've came into play when he had that "i got it" moment in his life. we actually have some telling placements here. he has three: his South Node, and asteroids Vesta and Pallas.

im actually not gonna talk about his asteroids because it's not why i'm here in your inbox. why i'm here is to discuss his South Node. this is extremely important, Mike girls. you should take notes. its gonna get melancholic.

in astrology, we have these things called Moon Nodes. you have a North and a South Node, and they will always be opposing each other in opposing signs, because they're supposed to; the North Node represents the present life, the quest, growth, while South Node represents the past life, the resource, our blockages. do you see where this is going?

i could explain the Nodes themselves, as it does give way to fully realizing their curriculum in his chart, but ive honestly hadn't gotten around to fully understanding them just yet because i'm still stuck on degree theory. i'm only sharing what i know and what i'm currently reading on them so that i can explain this correctly. you can read here and here if you sincerely need to know the details. all you have to know for this is that his NN is in Leo 6H and his SN in Aquarius 12H. i've already explained the 12H, but the 6H deals with daily living, organization, service and health. now you are bueno *whip crack effect* 👍

tw death mention coming up here//

i've been quietly busy piecing things together to see what important placements were there in-around the times of death for the three. mistakenly, at first, i would focus heavily on their profection year they died and the aspects to it, without even considering the years before that would lead up to that. those prior years do in fact play a role here. what i've found is that there's no one important placement, aspect or degree that can encompass a death-like sentence to someone's astro makeup. while astrology cannot predict when or even how someone will die, what we can do is posthumously see what important factors lead to their passing.

in Mike's case, he passed in his 7H profection year; the year before, he was in his 6H; to note, he actually has a stellium here, which are all entirely retrograded, but that's not important to this. and guess what was there? because this was the year of 2020, when everyone was isolated and recollecting themselves; this was his Node's last attempts to sober him up before it all ended, and it had to do so by sheer force.

you know what happened next? he stopped hiding.

even after Davy had passed and he gave in to touring with his surviving band members, he still seemed to isolate himself after the show was over. barely showing for interviews with the others. didn't spill himself too much that wasn't about what was going on around him. he kept to himself as always and no one tried too hard to pry him. the usual Michael Nesmith routine.

but after Peter had passed, i think something just snapped in him. for some reason i feel like he found himself more comfortable being vulnerable after Peter was gone... really strange stuff. almost like he was afraid of being or feeling similar to him? ffs i wish he was still alive so i could ask him cause it's gonna kill me otherwise.

but now, amidst the chaos of 2020, instead of running away into comfort and escaping from being vulnerable, he brought those vulnerabilities out instead, especially so on stage. if i had to guess anything about Mike during this time, is that he just wanted to heal. he so badly wanted to mend things even after things were too late & far gone, which i would also include his physical health here too, as 6H rules physical health -- Micky did say he had health issues for a long while. but his struggles trying to communicate that among other things made it a too-little-too-late issue (uh-oh girls, it's his Saturn Rx 3H eating him alive!).

but what he could mend at that moment, he did, and what he was able to mend was his relationship to his audience. remember when we talked about this before with Peter? sighs. Mike went YOINK and took those lessons without directly discussing him, whether he knew it or not. he is sooooo irritating ❤

i'll end this off by sharing this: in one of my sources i have that actually talks about the Nodes, there's a section where the author explains the Nodes through the lens of different religious and cultural mythologies. of course, since we're talking about Mike, the Christian version stood out to me most for this case, which brings in the story of Adam & Eve. at first i passed it off cause it's only a short paragraph in a sea of much more lengthier mythologies, but the more i read it the more enlightening it became to me.

here's the direct quote:

"Eve draws Adam into the world of duality, relationship and further incarnation, by listening to the serpent. Later, Eve having given birth to Mary, God enters mankind through her, thus bringing the Christ out of Adam. Here I would understand Eve and Mary to be representing two different facets of the cosmic feminine principle. So by listening to the serpent, we move further into duality and the world of form, and by listening to God, we are reconnected with unity."

and in the end, Mike finally listened to God. properly. for once in his life.

.

[mysteriawrites]

We interrupt your regularly scheduled program for.............. A MATCHUP TRADE WITH

@erismor-iok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thx for letting me trade with you! Here is your matchup...DRUMROLL PLEASE!!!

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

NAGANOHARA YOIMIYA!!!

(this gif of her is so pretty) Srry if this doesn’t make a lot of sense lore wise I’m super behind on genshin lore because i suck at the game lol.

You and Yoimiya are pretty similar. You both love to express yourselves and do whatever you can to help others. You’re also able to hold a conversation and keep up with her teasing banter.

You guys met when your traveling theater group came to Inazuma to put on a show for this year’s summer festival on the request of the of the Yashiro comission. Your troupe had been becoming quite popular lately and since the boarders were reopened they thought it was the perfect opportunity.

As the writer director, and narrator of the show (i considered making you lead actress too but figured that’d probably be a bit much) you requested some pyrotechnics of your show (a reenactment of some archon battle) for special effects. Of course who better go ask then “The Queen of the Summer Festival” herself.

When you first came to her shop to put in the request it was love at first sight. After a bit of awkward nervousness you guys started talking while she took down your order. There was also plenty of flirty banter on her end (I think Yoimiya could be awkward but flirtatious if she wanted to be). After business was done she offered to show you around Inazuma and asked you out for lunch. You said yes.

You two walked around the festival together. She took you to all the best sights, you tasted all the amazing food, and you guys got matching yakatas (her face turned as red as her pyro vision when she saw you in it). It was the best day of both of your lives. Last but not least she took you to watch the fire works with her. The mood was perfect. So perfect in fact that…you two had your first kiss.

After the show was over you, although dejectedly, reminded her that you should get ready for the show. So she took you back and before you two parted way you offered her front row tickets. She promised she’d be watching and cheering you on (even if you weren’t technically on stage).

The play was mesmerizing. She was on the edge of her seat the whole time even though she knew the story by heart. The way you described the scene and told the story captivated her entire attention. After the show she ran back stage and hugged you showering you in compliments.

The next day Yoimiya woke up with a spring in her step. She was so excited to see you, she was gonna officially ask you to be her girlfriend. However, when she went to where the traveling theater caravan was staying, she was startled to find out it was gone. She went to Ayato himself to ask about what happened. He told her that since it was the last day of the festival the theater had left early that morning.

Yoimiya was devastated. You had left without saying so much as a goodbye. No one in all of Inazuma had ever seen Yoimiya so sad, so broken. She had lost her glow, her spark, her fire. Yoimiya went to the spot where you saw the fire works together and she cried. She cried for hours.

When she was finally all out of tears she went home. She opened the door and called out to her father, but there was no response. She hear laughter from the kitchen. Did her dad have a guest over. She followed the sound into the kitchen and her eyes widened. There you stood as beautiful as the day you met in your yukata having tea with her father. You turned to her, smiled and welcomed her home, but she tackled you in a hug before you could finish your sentence.

After she had calmed down you had explained the situation. Your theater trope had in fact left Inazuma, but you had decided to stay behind and set up permanent residence so you could learn more traditional Inazuman performance art (and so you could be closer to her. Yoimiya was so happy with the news and that night you stayed over for a laughter filled dinner that endes up with you two cuddling and now in an official relationship.

Hey again sorry this took so long, but is still kinda short. A lot of things happened in the last two weeks that just stole all my motivation and creative juice I wanted to have this done Wednesday or two Wednesdays ago i don’t remember i have no concept of time. But anyway I hope you enjoyed it.

Runners Up: Keqing, Ganyu, Xiangling, Thoma, Xingyan, Itto, Childe, Venti

[dualumina]

Pride asks: 1, 10, 14 <- specifically with there being two of you have you impacted each other?

Pride Asks!

...warning it's quite lengthy

1. Which labels do you use?

For the sake of not needing to explain it twice, we essentially have two sets of labels each. One set that we use publicly, and one set that's literally between only ourselves. Why? The simple answer is that most people like to wrap their head around something definitive, something they can understand in a single sentence or less. Gay, Bi, Non-binary, etc. being examples of that. Our "private" labels are as nuanced as we want them to be because we don't have to worry about putting them into words for others to understand.

Most of the time, today is an exception.

Also just because it ties in more with the last question, sexuality and romance will be covered there.

Clay - Private label would be masculine-leaning non-binary. However, as I want to avoid people treating me as an "it" or some variation of an object, or just perceiving me as even more abstract than my existence already entails, my public label is thus simply a boy.

Dual - Private label would be feminine agender, mainly because there's no need to defy femininity norms when it's in the mind. Just as Clay can look however he wants within the mind, I can likewise "see" how I'd most want myself to look like, and I recognize both the lack of gender and the keenly present feminine traits. Unfortunately, people tend to latch onto what is there instead of what isn't. As a sort of pushback, my public label is a trans feminine boy. It illustrates that I don't connect with my body's initial gender enough to get the point that I want across.

10. Something that gives you gender euphoria

Clay - Uhh.. Dual's voice after the hormone treatments, I guess? I can "take over" using certain parts of the body if we're both feeling up to it (it takes a lot more effort than it's worth for doing daily tasks) and I had the worst time with speaking directly because I would freeze up after hearing the shocking disconnect between the voice I was able to produce vs the voice I knew was my own. And, well, now it's not exactly how my voice sounds like but it's quite close, and I think if we bothered to practice it could get better.

Dual - I can't do much about my hips considering they're bone and all, but after the chest surgery wearing skin-tight shirts feels really rewarding now. Even if most days we don't leave the house we're just in baggy pyjama t-shirts due to them being more comfortable.

14. How do you think other factors like neurodivergency or upbringing have impacted your identity?

Clay - Both of us initially assumed that I was asexual (we weren't familiar with what aromantic was at the time but in retrospect we also assumed I was that). It would only be years down the road when it was realized that oh wait, actually I'm demi-sex/rom. Given how infrequently I become close with others (plurality is often accepted less than any label under the LGBT+ umbrella, so.. our default for awhile was to hide it) and I might as well have been/be ace.

Shocking no one ever that Dual was the first person I became close to, navigating that aspect of demi-sex/romness was an interesting time to say the least, especially considering they were dating someone then, even if that relationship wouldn't last much longer.

I think realizing that probably would have transpired earlier if we didn't previously have various rules in place to "keep the peace" as we liked to call it. Intrusive thoughts can be a lot more.. hazardous when your home is thoughts, hence why the rules first existed. But in time they grew outdated, had to be changed, dropped entirely for some cases. Medication helped with the intrusive thoughts part, and we worked on the rest.

We're still nervously waiting to see if we'll get prescribed something at some point that severely limits my existence, but so far fatigue (that's experienced by both of us) has been the main albeit temporary detriment some medications have caused.

It's worth mentioning but I knew off the bat that I was male in some way, whether that's related to Dual's disconnect with their birth gender is something we're not entirely sure of. There were some polls done in the Reddit tulpa community several years ago that showed most tulpas are the opposite gender to their host, but I don't recall what the stats were for trans hosts.

Dual - Despite never really having been the type of Catholic growing up to spread the word and all that, I did keep certain values drilled into me for a very long time, like various things regarding sex, monogamy, avoiding temptations and the like. So here I was, an at the time cis straight-leaning female, with a guy now constantly around who was allergic to wearing clothes. I had to learn how to get comfortable with certain things real freaking quicker than my crumbling religious beliefs were made for. That's likely what opened up my mind to more progressive mindsets, especially after living in a small town with only one flamboyantly gay guy in my high school.

It's somewhat tricky to pinpoint exactly what sexuality I am, though I'm inclined to say demi-sexual, or androgenosexual, perhaps both. The joke I like to make is that I'm open to dating anyone but it has to be gay. You could be a straight cis anything but if we're dating it must be treated as a gay relationship lol

Can definitely say that the androgenosexual part of that (and likewise beginning to question the whether I wanted to date them or BE them mentality) was influenced by Clay being a painfully evident twink.

Romantic-wise, I wish I was aro. I've yet to be convinced otherwise that being demiromantic is a positive thing, because in my eyes it IS a curse. I want to have close friends and not worry that maybe I'll start developing feelings for them, potentially jeopardizing the friendship. This might be tied into the aforementioned religious beliefs about temptation, but it's more complicated than that. I don't believe all demiromantics are cursed, but in my own experiences completely separate from Clay, it's never gone well.

I recently learned that ADHD can, not only cause hyper fixations for fictional media, but also likewise bring about similar hyper fixations towards crushes.

Which unfortunately, explains a lot.

So while I know why these feelings happen, it doesn't change how intense they can be at times, how the impulsivity of ADHD means that sometimes I might do or say things I'll end up dreading after the fact, even if the other person doesn't think twice about it.

I know how creepy it can be to be on the receiving end of what could be considered obsessive behavior, so I'm actively monitoring myself around certain people, which incidentally was something I felt the need to do around Clay in the past. The only positive aspect of being an ADHD demiromantic is that hyper fixations come and go... I just need to actively suffocate myself until then.

It's one of the few things about myself I wish I could radically change. Maybe this isn't quite demiromanticness, but I can certainly say that it has only happened with people I consider to be friends.

[scentedchildnacho]

I did talk to the city about shelter and they warned me their behaviourists not substance removers so I said I notice with shelters my victimization gets blamed for Japan policy the Japanese government may decide who breeds together....Phyllis chesler on allies finding mental invertebrate compounds now how are these body parts and colors really making sense together

I notice women around me if males are allowed have competitive policy and a diva starts giving them less then desirable mates and their a mate often

Greek divas other Greek emigrates may never display her status and connections

If it's me it has to be woman only or an over lord will decide something racist and always has been

Its more that I was a lutheran then white though the naacp in biloxi mississippi told me I should notice about protestantism that my dislike of being really church is that I was more white in some way....

So it's more that religion here is still viewed as jewish Africa instead of indigenous as free white people...that is still causing me attackers that wear themselves more darkly then they really are....

Its still needs to cause cuban batista venereal disease of the Mississippi as The pee nile sores

What's with the last internment of claiming my attacker can be over twice my size and much darker then would ever be a marital proposition in my life it's how beligerently unwanted the idea is

I may date Indians and go to civil 80s courts about really traditional passive unfairness but the idea my type is suddenly a basketball wife is just horrid lewd and grotesque

Especially considering it's been decided the states is largely homo genetic but somehow it's randomly decided that I be forced with the most opposite to me the most scary and unwanted...

So the help was German and I do still look like cane workers in Florida that carried machetes and took care of their immigrationist themselves so it's needs to steal my customs and put me on permissions till I'm so angry I feel called a hutus

Anyway I noticed this to all the women around me at the last house internment needing to steal their stuff and sedate them and get away with pervert stuff to them when their not aware to consent till their driven irate

If I try to ally homosexual interest groups like transexuals I have to be really angry and called bipolar

So I've noticed myself have a prostitute terrorist that even the desirable separated to divorcees become a desperate compulsive need to be seen with or they would get called homeless it's a prostitute dating all of it and not leaving any networking for anyone else

Eva Michelle....the men at awa had some problems of their own to work out and they still very desperately spread their love among them and left me with little to nothing to do and no spending money either

Drunks also....some of the bartenders around do really deserve a rehab and will still stalk me to serve their sentencing they don't apologize

Their men and homosexuals you cannot allow intimacy or they do it

Michelle it's more a gay that brought a Cuban immigrationist that caused unwanted open sexuality and will to avoid punishment try to blame me for it

And that's why I was more white not an immigrant and I don't bring on people the worst financial terrorist ever that to me was really bad

Then I was watching east county advertisements for shelters and they were like they are the type of lady that He finally did something to them brutal enough for them to take up tribal hobbies so I hope it doesn't come into my life to have to do but mentals have already approached me with David myth and biological weapons and I should realize these handy self defense items to just quick cause a vaccine to someone

Germans are around you can really take down something much larger then yourself

Uhm well I thought we all agreed that our better lives would know to not have intimacy in serious competition areas....and marry foriegnly......but somehow the areas of obligative mistressing have an aids ness about it till I'm like i prefer to just be alone and not worry about what God will provide or not

I was watching al jazeera and I start feeling bad his wife had to have five pregnancies and no foreign other would finally fill up his time sometimes so that's what I think happens to me till I'm like I prefer to just be alone

I start noticing the wife birthers never getting to be alone till people hand me a book of Mormon

And that's when rainbow noticed birth of stars as too obligated to it all

And that's when the Iihs told me it's not really my fault the politics leaving Indians in the global south are more to blame

No I wouldn't prostitute I was a Christian so sex to me is recreation it's superfluous to necessity and can't have any economic or it is like a universal bond between two people that binds them forever together

I would like be a rolfer or a body worker of some sort

Sexuality is animal magnetism and it's this disbelief as an historic node that continues to provide disease in the body leading to compulsive acts otherwise not good breeding

Then the hare Krishnas were giving me reads to explain its very real that petitioners in India will go to all they can to hex and curse ya out with any number of your a circus side show and their racially pure etc

I was white and it's just phobic and annoying to her or more personnally that was her Indian

Other times it's like children of God and people exclude me from socializing because it's Kathryn you are effete though and you would just get hurt and people want to send me away to Parisians

It's not even mean sometimes it's Kathryn we are like occupied by Russians and those men do really have energy privileges to you and you can't go because they trespass here and call you trespassing on them and they would beat you like a bitch

Or to London it's all this im too effete for invites so it's send her to London to get well which doesn't make sense because london can be an even more severe climate

She asked me about shelter so I told her to forgive the city I asked them to help and do their own problems so this can take awhile if I won't develop a criminality and remove my thieves from me myself

Its terrorism if I tried to remove thieves from me myself it would just be a hydra head of more and more and more felony releases that all feel entitled to my stuff

My stuff was called an earned prison sentence so one felon in Florida has my housing stipends and I have to marry him and save his daughter from incest or live on the street

My stuff is really gender neutral so I attract fair evil as a thief of my womanlyness like no other

Or bartenders....the bar scene is noticed trying Hollywood stuff and assuming their kin of missing people they shouldn't bartenders are incapable of an authenticity that would relate them to missing minors women and children and have horrible lives attempting to be like missing and murdered people

I notice my stuff as pennhurst like so it's not surprising to me anymore that I can apparently be battered off my things for The real estate

Anyway unselfishness.......was brought to my attention as a possibility to escape my stuff my stuff so hopefully a benefactor actually out to be benevolent to my case will arrive instead of this pimpish pseudo help that claims with money they want to help and keeps leaving me with their awful spoiled mean skinny jobs that just lift my purse do nothing for me so they can be disciplined into playboy I assume

[mxstball]

Check In: Jeanne

"Everything alright with you and Father, Heidi?" Jeanne made it to Heidi's room. Heidi called her inside.

"Yeah. We... just needed a little time to talk." Heidi nodded. "Speaking of which, still is a little weird that you knew that I was going to be an Arceus even before I did."

"Oh! Yeah. I was told that I have good aura perception and instincts, but even I was confused when you said that you were just a Latias."

Heidi nodded. "Well, mark me as another person that can vouch for your abilities, Jeanne."

The two mini-creators laughed together. They haven't known each other for very long, but they still considered each other as good friends.

"...Anyway, Jeanne. There's... something that I need to speak to you about."

"What's up?" Jeanne nodded. "Considering everything that's going on, I assume this has to do with Friede?"

"It does, yes." Heidi got up. "...but it also comes with a request."

"What is it?"

"Well... now that Dawn has passed away, it's finally time for me to battle Friede once and for all. I've spent the better part of 5 years training and working for this very moment, but... I guess you can say that I'm just... worried, you know?"

"...You're worried that you won't be strong enough to beat her?"

Heidi nodded.

"Mmm." Jeanne started scratching her head. "...I get it. Friede is incredibly strong. When she came to our world and tried to destroy it, it was me who challenged her so my siblings and mom could escape. I don't think I've ever went against a foe that compared to her, and I still think about my failure to this very day...." She then shook her head. "But... you're different, Heidi. If there's anyone that I could get a feel that could take her down... it would be you. Even when I sensed you during the last holiday party, I could tell that you were definitely strong -- definitely better than some Arceus that I've fought against, let alone for just being a Latias. Now... I can feel that there's something within you that could be the key in beating her and ending her crusade...."

"...."

"....I guess what I'm saying is that my intuition is telling me that you got this, Heidi. Everyone's counting on you and that's a lot of pressure, but we're counting on you because we know that you can do it! Just make sure to put a little faith in yourself and give it your all against her."

"..." Heidi nodded. Jeanne was right. Heidi knew that everyone had their faith in her because they knew that she could do this. They knew that she's come all of this way to keep this world safe from Friede and anyone that would try to threaten it. She... just hoped that Jeanne was right.

"....Jeanne."

"Yeah?"

"Should I fail... and should this world fall, can you do me a favor?"

"It won't, but what is it?"

"Lati. Can... you take him to live with Leah? I understand that Rayquaza wishes to defend this world with his life, but Lati... he's too young and small to make that decision right now. Please, take him and escape with him if this situation becomes dire."

"....You have my word with Lati." Jeanne nodded. "I'll make sure that he makes it to Aunt Leah... but I'll be personally coming back when that's done."

"Huh?"

Jeanne shook her head. "If Father stays, then I stay. This is his home, and so this is my home. I don't think that you'll fail, but if Friede somehow wins and my intuition is wrong, then I'll take Lati, take him to live with Aunt Leah... and then return here to defend this place with my life. If Rayquaza and I are not enough to save this world, then at least I die with my father."

"But Jeanne, you don't have to--"

"No. I do." Jeanne denied Heidi the opportunity to finish that sentence. "I've spent my entire life wanting to be with my father. I've endured through so much with my world and against my mother even for the small amount of time that I was able to spend with him. Do you think that my fight with her was the first time that I've tried to battle her for my freedom? Because it's not. I've worked so hard to finally spent time with him, and he turned out to be everything that I've wanted out of a father and so much more. This year... it's been the happiest that I've ever been, and for Friede to think that she'll take that away? I won't have it."

"..." Heidi didn't know what to say, at least not enough to justify not allowing Jeanne to continue.

"Heidi. I know that you're going to win this fight, but even if you don't.... even if you die out there, know that I'm here... and I'll be here to defend this place, to defend my father, and to defend all of the people and Pokémon within it. Besides, I've grown so much stronger these 50 years since I last battled her. I don't mind giving her a piece of my fucking mind."

"..." Heidi walked up to Jeanne and hugged her. "...th--thank you, Jeanne. I... I just hope that it doesn't have to get to that point."

"It won't." Jeanne giggled. "Just believe in yourself and you'll show her who's boss. Just... sneak in an extra punch or two for me, will ya?"

"Alright. Alright. I'll see what I can do." Heidi nodded.

[lady-griffin]

You know what always, ALWAYS, breaks my heart.

The fact that Jinx truly doesn’t believe she is loved; yet she is one of the most loved people in this entire show. It’s just so fucking tragic that she can’t see that.

Silco and Vi love her so goddamn much.

The climax of season 1, boils down to these two fighting for Jinx to pick them over the other, to stay with with them, be their family. 

Jinx has literally just kidnapped them and shown herself to clearly be a danger to their lives and general safety, and yet….

The thought of losing her is unbearable to both Silco and Vi.

Silco would never have given her up. Never!

This is a man who less than a decade ago, would’ve sacrificed anything and anyone for his cause; but now…

He would burn everything and everyone for his daughter. For her to remain at his side.

She killed him and the most important thing to Silco, in his last moments, was making sure she knew he would have never given her up, that nothing was worth her, to comfort her, and tell her she was perfect.

And Vi. My other poor, tragic and beautiful daughter.

I don’t know how anyone can say Vi doesn’t love her sister. Did you even watch the show?

I think it’s such a misjudgment of Vi’s character that people say because she freezes up and doesn’t try “harder” to reach out to Jinx that she doesn’t love her. 

Because think about that for a second -

Vi who is this seemingly unstoppable force of nature, completely freezes when it comes to Jinx.

She is so scared of losing her sister, of saying or doing the wrong thing, of hurting her again.

Vi blames herself so goddamn much to the point that Vi, VI, who is absolutely defined by her fighter response, just freezes when it comes to Jinx.

These two love Jinx so goddamn much and it breaks my heart how Jinx can’t see that; or at least not until it’s too late.

Then you have Ekko. Forget romantic feelings or crushes; this boy loved his best friend so goddamn much and had so much respect for her; that despite her (from his POV) choosing to be ‘evil,’ still put her on his mural of those he’s lost.

Jinx has killed people on that mural; and yet there is Powder in the center of everyone that Ekko lost that one awful night. She is one of three largest portraits up there. That’s an insane amount of love and respect to give to her; especially considering how their relationship devolved.

And then you get to their fight and Ekko who has been fighting Jinx and Silco for years; who has lost many of his people to them. Who is so angry and filled with pain and hates Jinx...

God, the look on his face when he realizes who he’s hurting, who is underneath him. This poor, beautiful boy goes through like several different stages of shock, pain, and longing in a matter of seconds, when he actually sees Jinx.

Then you have Vander. I know we don’t have much between him and Powder, but I am baffled by the idea that people think Vander didn’t love her.

His last words to Vi were - “Take care of Powder.”

In his dying moments, Vander thought of Powder; she was that important to him.

Now, if he has a few more sentences I’m sure he would’ve also told Vi to not seek revenge on Silco, because he wasn’t worth Vi and Powder’s lives and their safety, as well as reaffirm his love and pride for Vi.

But he didn’t get more time; so he said what was most important to him in that moment - “Take care of Powder.”

Don’t even try to say that Vander didn’t love Powder.

And while we don’t see much of them; you cannot tell me that Claggor and Mylo didn’t love Powder. Yes, even Mylo.

Mylo was an insecure, young boy who took out his anger and frustrations on his younger sister; because she was even more of a weak link than he was and he wanted to feel better about himself.

But, I can’t imagine he would’ve ever wanted to be such a source of pain and torment for her, that Jinx’s Demon!Mylo has become.

And, while we only see a few interactions between them, just the way Claggor looked at Powder tells me that he loved and cared for her.

This girl is so beyond loved (and has been loved) but yet, she can’t see it. Likely because she doesn’t love herself; she has a hard time imagining that someone could love her.

Which again, is just heartbreakingly tragic.

[a-gal-with-taste]

Pretty please!

Silco trying to win ex!reader back? Angst to fluff maybe? Finn being an ass maybe???

*fans self* oh, to have one of the most notorious and powerful men in the Undercity groveling before you! That's the Zaunite dream, everybody.

Three strikes. You would give him that - already more than he deserved, in your opinion - and at the end of those three strikes, you would be out.

Silco didn't have a great start, with cornering you like this. One down, two to go, and his introduction looked equally unpromising. "You've been avoiding me."

Your eyes immediately found the glass-structured ceiling, while your hands busied with gathering up your paperwork. "Yes, Silco," Dryly, you paused briefly to glance over the freshly-signed document, before tucking it into your arm with the rest. "That tends to happen when two people break up. Exes avoid one another, to some extent."

You didn't realize he had been tapping his ungloved hands in a terse, sharp rhythm. Not until the sound of his blunt nails stopped hitting the tabletop of the Baron Hall.

"...Exes?"

Was he...?

No, he couldn't be surprised, could he? Bad-enough for Silco be indifferent, as he had been when you had gathered your things from the floor of The Last Drop office, storming out without a goodbye, and without another response from him.

The blatant lack of correspondence or messages between, not to mention the distinct lack of greeting at the start of the Baron assembly, should've been more than enough clues. And yet here Silco was, stone still and just as unreadable as a rock, staring at you with two eyes that have become equally unblinking, as he repeats the word.

"Exes."

"Yes... previous partners. Discontinued relationship. Termination of romantic connections." Sneering at the last one, some scorned part of you couldn't resist but chancing a glance at him as you kicked your chair into a place with a room-echoing thud. Silco didn't so much move - practically living marble now. "Or whatever kind of 'connection' you think we had... I know you're practically allergic to the idea of a label, so forgive me for any assumptions I may have made after several months we spent together."

The final half of your sentence is spoken over your shoulder, before Silco committed his second-strike by a sharp, low call of, "Don't you dare leave."

Ordering you to stay behind, and now ordering you to stay in place? Out of spite, you considered jogging to the door, but thought better of it to whirl around and glare at the man, unaffected at one narrowed eye and braced hands splayed on the table as he looms from his seat. "Where was that energy last week?"

"I don't know what you're-"

"Or the entire time we've been together?" Eyes narrowed, you turn sharply on a heel and put a hand on your hip. "Not once do I recall you ever asking me to stay. Not after a dinner, not after a 'private meeting', and certainly never the morning-after." That had been the final straw - nothing, not even a grunt of acknowledgement as you had slowly slipped the scattered articles of your clothing back on.

You had gone slow, waiting, and honestly hoping, for an invitation. Or at least some sign that this wasn't just some flight of fancy to keep you both entertained between each headache-inducing Baron meetings.

Silco hadn't even looked at you when you finally slipped out the door, a quiet farewell on your lips, and a hurt, bitter seed planted.

More hurt than bitter, if you were honest.

But you didn't let it show, instead narrowed your eyes coolly when you saw his jaw twitch, teeth no doubt grinding in his mouth. "Silco, I'm tired. Tired, and too old to be playing will-we-won't-we."

"Believe it or not, I'm not playing games either," He retorted, but the fire in his tone was weak, barely flickering even while his eye smoldered instead of burned. "Especially not games that end with you storming off before we've even spoken about this-"

You interrupt him smoothly, "No, i'm speaking. I'm speaking, because you clearly haven't been the entire time I've been with you." Tucking the papers close to your chest, you turned and narrowed your eyes at him. "Labels are a dangerous, and powerful thing - I know this. But I would like to at least know if I have one with you, or if I'm just a brief stint of entertainment."

The papers crinkled in your hands, causing unreadable green and red to glance down. There was a firmer-set to his jaw, one that lingered even after you relaxed your tense grip around your papers.

"And if I'm just for entertainment... well, it's a big Undercity. I'm sure you can find a new source of fun." You shrugged a shoulder and turned with the motion, trying to seem at loose and at ease. Difficult, for you could hear the sharp clicks on your shoes echoing off the floor in your escape.

It was joined quickly by another pair, following smoothly after you as Silco committed his third-strike.

"Wait."

You didn't - you wouldn't - not when he kept using that tone like you were just a Baron and he was just the Eye...

"Please."

You waited; froze really, before turning sharply to face the Kingpin. Standing stiff as marble, with leather gloves straining in the fight fists formed at his sides and you realized Silco didn't look angry. Nor vexed, or annoyed, but what little you could gleam from that rather thin layer of detachment in his eye, was the emotion of panic.

Panic, at the thought of you walking away. Or maybe he was feeling such an emotion for a million other reasons, but just as the thought that he could expression such an emotion because of you, made you mentally deduct one strike from his list of failures, and turn to face Silco fully when he stepped closer.

"I have... grown fond of you."

Habit, sadly, made you immediately go to deny it. "Don't comfort me if you're going to lie-"

"I have."

Another hesitation is equal to another step from him, and once again you don't step back. Nor do you move away from the other following steps Silco makes towards you, until he's standing at a distance that forces your head to tilt up to continue meeting his gaze. "Entertainment is a... bonus, to what we have developed over the course of the last several months we've been seeing one another. I won't deny that," He says, unapologetically so, and you give a small nod for him to continue after mulling over that for a moment.

"I've neglected putting on a label, as you so put it, because there are several ramifications to consider, that such an action would send rippling across the Undercity." He’s right - politically, a union between Baron and King would make a further chaotic mess of Zaunite politics, more so than it naturally was. It’s a reminder that primes you for disappointment, until Silco continues, simply and slowly, but with enough pointedness in his tone that you can almost take his words as sincere. 

“But ramifications can be minimized. Damage-control is possible and...” A hesitation, a faint bobbing of his throat before those fists unclench at his side, and leaver-clad fingers loosely rest upon one of your wrists. “And I,” He continues, slowly as if saying them aloud for the first time. “- would very much prefer having to deal with such public and governmental disgruntlement, with you at my side.”

The corners of your mouth twitched without your permission, and Silco took it as a sign to lower the careful guard in his eyes, looking over your expression for other signs of your agreement, with an equal gleam of hope showing faintly in his green-eye.

And yes, you had hope. Hope that this was true, hope that he meant this... But you also had a bit of bitterness, and the skepticism couldn’t be kept out of your tone, “You could’ve said any of this sooner. You should’ve said this sooner, instead of nothing at all.”

“I’m aware, but i’m prepared to speak more now,” He tilts his chin up slightly, looking down on you over the length of his nose as he adds, “If you’ll have me.”

It... was tempting. Extremely so, and beneath that bitterness in the center of your chest, there was something giddy, hoping and wanting for this. The other Barons would be a nightmare, whining about favoritism and rank-climbing, but though there hadn’t been nearly enough words during your time with Silco, you had more than enough glimpses of what a life with him was like, in order to wish for the full-picture.

Still, as tempting as it was, as much as you did, truly want this, want him, you had yet to have heard a proper apology from him.

“Again, for a man whose strong-suit is words, I have yet to have heard enough to convince me.” You step away as his chin droops, staring at you openly with an eye as wide as the other, and no small amount of growing bitter disappointment in his gaze... You let Silco fester in the familiar taste, before you smile sweetly, and seeking for blood in the water. “Maybe you should say it on your knees.”

“What?”

“Actions speak louder than words, and you’ve been lacking in the latter. Maybe it’s about time you said it with the former.” A glance to the ground to punctuate your words, but the man only continues to stare incredulously, while your grin only gets wider.

The incredulous look begins to melt, both in the eye of fire and of sea-green, into something that burns. Burning with slight indignation, a promise that such a ludicrous order will not be forgotten swiftly... but it also burns with the slightest hint of begrudgement, that you don’t necessarily believe, until he sinks down.

It barely registers in your mind, for the sight is so momentous and equally outrageous, that even as your head robotically tilts to watch his descent, you find it hard to believe. Silco, on his knees before you - certainly not overly-eager, but there’s a calmness in his gaze that shows he is not so adverse to the action that retribution will come.

Immediately, that is. You have no doubt you’ll pay for this, one way or another, but it’s a punishment that’s already more than worth-it for the sight before you.

“I am sorry.”

Your eyes grow wider, and if Silco didn’t reach up to slip his fingers around your own, you were certain the papers you had gathered would have found their way to the ground regardless. “I am, and I would very much like to make up for my failings, and past transgressions, if you’ll have me.” The firm lines in his face, only slightly betraying his words, deepen with you raising a brow. It practically has to be dragged out of him with hooks, and it’s the quietest sound you’ve ever heard come out of a man, but with the squeezing of his hands around yours, comes a sound that sounds suspiciously like yet another, “Please.”

All three strikes are redacted, by that one word.

There’s a smile already betraying your lengthy consideration in your mind, when you recall the fact that there was a collection of paperwork left behind on Finn’s side of the table. You’re reminded fairly quickly, when the growing look of satisfaction and zeal is erased almost instantly from Silco’s eyes at Finn’s smug, bemused call near the entrance, clearly relishing in the sight, “Ah, the great Silco has fallen, has he?”

“Finn, I'm more than happy to make the top-jaw match the bottom.”

Despite the growing snarl building on Silco’s lip, preparing for his own sharp rebuke for the very unwelcomed spectator, there’s a certain glint of admiration in his eyes at your dry, calm threat to the living annoyance.

Even if you’ve been interrupted, you hope he can see the answer in your eyes, and the unspoken acceptance of his apology and offer, in the squeeze of your hands as you raise him back up onto his feet. Again, words were more than welcomed, but it seemed the actions were just as appreciated, considering how readily he squeezed your hands back.

Any cold bitterness left behind within you, vanished at the feel of his warm hands around yours.

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[thefirstknife]

So, given the relics seem to be confirmed as body parts of some type, whose body parts *are* they? And are we facilitating their resurrection by bringing all their parts together like Exodia the Forbidden One?

Given the many recent nods and various hints, my vote is on Nezarec. Especially since Drifter said the relics remind him of "something from a long time ago." It can be a hint to the ice planet (given the planet's ties to Darkness), but since Drifter is the only person to have ever mentioned (and visited) something called the Fourth Tomb of Nezarec, it makes more sense that it reminds him of that:

"He says he's seen the deep side of Jupiter. Been to the Core Mines of Saturn. Name drops old myths no one's heard—the Luvial Crux, the Shift Chasms Below Elios, the Fourth Tomb of Nezarec. Goes on about the Idols of Lower Sul, the Treasure of Exodus Prime, the Solar Engine of Dead Star-Six.

"I think he's making most of it up, but he's got relics and etchings. He's got materials not of this system—odd metals, obsidian flames, thought engines, edible null cakes and a stuffed something that looks like a rabbit bio-fused with a cephalopod. He keeps all this stuff to himself—his 'gets,' he calls 'em.

Not only did he speak of the place, but he had items to prove that he's not lying, including "relics." The person narrating this lore tab is Shin Malphur, btw, so it can be considered reliable (especially since he didn't believe Drifter until Drifter showed him proof).

The "tomb" imagery fits with these reliquaries much better than the ice planet. Nezarec apparently had multiple tombs and it makes sense that any place where a reliquary of him would be placed to be considered a tomb. It would explain the "fourth" tomb.

There's been another mention of tombs this season: the seasonal exotic, Delicate Tomb. We have no clue who is narrating the lore tab for this weapon, btw. But it's something that's still "alive" and able to whisper. Just like the relics. From the quest for the catalyst:

"Nice-lookin' weapon, Guardian," he says. He takes it from you and tests its weight. "Very..."

A strange look crosses the Exo's face. "Huh," he says quietly, "though I heard something."

And Nezarec's Whisper:

On the floor, a length of unidentifiable metal caked in centuries of dust catches her eye. A glaive. Eris lifts it into her hand. Striations of red illuminate on its surface and throb like a heartbeat. The glaive's power feels faint—distant—and yet, an ember of something terrible still burns within.

A similar lingering power is also implied in the Delicate Tomb lore tab:

I am made finite. Personal. Bright and delicate to hide my true form. An intimacy.

They think me contained, but I am instead diffused, as vapor upon the wind.

Once again, I am becoming.

From what can be understood here, the fusion rifle, Delicate Tomb, is yet another relic. It was deliberately crafted to appear "bright and delicate" so it could hide the true form of the entity within. It also implies that the weapon gives people the false safety that the entity is contained inside, but it's clearly not as it can very much influence things around it. The last sentence also parallels something from the original mention of Nezarec, Nezarec's Sin exotic:

"He is that which is an end. And he shall rise again." —passage from Of Hated Nezarec, a pre-Golden Age text.

I'm not sure about the nature of us assembling him and what will happen when we do. I am still reluctant to say that we may see Nezarec as an actual talking, walking character. I would love that, but I don't want to hype people up. So, are we gonna put him together and he will show up and we'll have to deal with him somehow? No clue. But the relics whisper and this weapon whispers and his glaive still holds power and most of this lore indicates that this entity, whatever he is, still has power and some form of existence.

The one thing that I've been thinking about now is how it's more or less established that Nezarec was a Disciple in charge of the Lunar Pyramid. And on Nezarec's Sin, the text telling us about him is "pre-Golden Age." Somebody on Earth (? presumably) knew about Nezarec (somehow?) before the Traveler ever came to us. It reminded me of how strange the Lunar Pyramid is, deep inside the Moon, too deep to have gotten there by simply crashing. It's more or less in the core of the Moon. Unless they handwave it as the Pyramid getting inside paracausaly, it couldn't have gotten there by having crashed in the Collapse. Not only is it too deep and there is no proper impact crater, Nezarec (and the Pyramid?) were known to someone before the Collapse. Before even the Golden Age.

I think that Pyramid, and Nezarec, have been in our system observing us for a very, VERY, long time.

That's just a little side note about something that's been bothering me pretty much ever since I first saw the Pyramid on the Moon. How did it get there and when.

Bonus:

😂😂😂