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#the need to both be VERY specific about all of it and also explain multiple tangents in excruciating detail and like. its probably not fun
sparring-spirals · 2 years
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you know i just had this thought, cause i saw your posts about feeling a little iffy with the whole mixing c2 and c3 characters thing, and like, if you’re looking from the standpoint of critical role as a show, and the cast as storytellers, then yeah there’s kinda this worry about past campaigns and character arcs overshadowing the current ones
but
but if you look from the viewpoint of a group of friends playing dnd, having your old characters show up in your current game and team up with the new party is just like, the coolest thing ever, no questions asked
Oh yeah, 100%! The cameo/crossover thing is exciting and lovely as is, and definitely really fucking fun for them. and us! Shared universes and crossover AU's/episodes and etc are popular for a reason!
okay, this answer got out of hand. hopefully it makes sense. my thinking is something like- yeah! bringing in caleb and beau and other cross campaign cameos and big shared universes like this is a perfectly reasonable kind of storytelling and very exciting. That said- yes, the broader story implications, possibilities, potential impacts, focus on Bells and the space for their arcs, etc, I have personal reservations on. And part of that is also tied to shared universe, MCU crossover style storytelling/worldbuilding not really being my cup of tea.
But that's not necessarily like, an indictment of what the cast chose to do or even an indictment of people (me, im people) enjoying the actual crossover encounters. Because they're fun! Exciting! Its cool to see characters you love and watched in a unique, fleshed out context collide with completely different characters who you love in a unique context. I bet this goes threefold for the cast, getting to see their characters alive ans breathing in the world, acting on their own. The point of crossovers and cameos is for this kind of joy! There's no real use to me pretending I'm not thrilled by their presence, or to not wonder about their wellbeing in past years or what other familiar faces are doing in the meantime.
The flipside is. Yes. Broader storytelling implications and concerns. That in the context of the Bell's Hells story, I want to be careful to still treat them as the main characters of this campaign, with the real estate and weight that deserves. Everything else about overshadowing and etc aside. Caleb and Beau and everyone else in the Mighty Nein had their campaign, and a wrap up and an epilogue, and my own soppy feelings about that aside, that is important. This campaign is the Bell's Hells, its theirs, and about their stories, and them. The M9 are, now, NPC's- and I have a lot of thoughts about how that is its own good ending, its about knowing when stories should be closed while letting the characters live on beyond them- but that should be its own meta fuck goddammit. And that's important. Its very important to me that I am, above all else, treating the Bell's Hells story as theirs.
The most direct example I can give, I think, is that before they intervened, I was somewhat okay with the Bell's Hells failing in some sense, Ludinus getting away with some part of his plan. Knowing that Beauregard and Caleb are involved brings up a specific feeling of wanting them to succeed, thinking about things they have waiting at home, the campaign that already went by and the epilogues I had already promised them in my head.
But- this is not their campaign, and this is not soley their issue anymore either. If I really handle them as NPC's, if I can decouple the thought of Ludinus as their behemoth to tackle, and think again about this issue in context of Bell's Hells, disastrous and loving and 50% unreliable with a moon over their shoulders- the perspective on the situation and what I want out of it and them and everything- shifts. And it's important to me I take the time to do that, as much as I love the empire sibs and am thinking fondly about their careers and loves and hopes.
but none of that is mutually exclusive with me making little heart eyes at the two of them and reblogging all the art of that scene. :)
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burnorgetburned · 1 year
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EVEN MORE CLARA DOLL DETAILS:
So you know how the Dolls have their own distinctive clothes?
Guess who else has their own distinctive clothes!
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That’s right. The multiple Homuras are actually Clara Dolls.
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And that’s why ‘Homura’ is smiling.
Here they are! The one with the striped hat is Nekura (Gloominess or Pessimism) and the one with the flower is Mie (Vanity).
Here’s their descriptions from the art book.
[The second one to come was Gloominess. Walking out with a tapping sound, she sneered at Good-for-Nothing. “This is Good-for-Nothing! How very unbecoming.” These dolls are only disciples of Freedom, and are devoted to their lust for it.]
[The tenth to come running is Vanity. She exaggeratedly avoids Good-for-Nothing's head and says a few words. “I wouldn't be able to bear dirtying my cape with that sticky blood!” These dolls make fun of the witch's self-mutilation.]
Good-for-Nothing is Homura, by the way, but the Clara Dolls seem to consider Good-for-Nothing to be good for something after all after she splits Madoka. She turns into the Devil, and the Clara Dolls are stated to be “okay” with the Devil. If the young voices in the trailer belong to the Clara Dolls, then they also call her “Akuma-sama” now. Something like Mistress Devil, implying a sense of respect.
[… if they are not summoned, they will simmer. There are orders they will comply with, and also orders they will disobey. What they are and the witch herself's own magic are not well understood.]
At the end of Rebellion, Homura gave Madoka her ribbon back. She declared that they might become enemies in the end. Honestly, I thought that Homura would try her best to avoid Madoka entirely. The trailer suggested that Homura was meeting Madoka, though. Here’s the answer: it wasn’t Homura herself, but Gloominess, who wants freedom.
Now, I’m not sure how this situation works out. Do Clara Dolls have free will? Are they obeying Homura’s orders? Acting out Homura’s true emotions? Is Homura perhaps directly puppeteering them in order to fulfill her goals, or do they act on their own?
I find it likely that it’s a mix of both: some of them obey her, and some of them will try and fulfill her (probably very conflicting) desires, as familiars usually do. Gloominess is likely part of Homura who wants the freedom to talk to Madoka, for example, but Vanity seems to me like a Clara Doll who is obeying Homura. After all, she still needs magical girls to fight wraiths, at least until she finds a way to wipe them out.
[I'm Vanity (Mie). I'm pushing myself to the limit for someone.] And she is, of course. All of the theatrics, the calls, the organization of magical girls. These are things that Vanity is shown to engage in. All of this is for Madoka.
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We see with Gloominess, at least, that she seems to be fulfilling a specific desire: in the background are white spider lilies. Instead of the red spider lilies that mean death, final goodbyes, and lost love, white spider lilies mean a hope for the future and a fresh start. Maybe this really is the first meeting for these two in a while, and she wants to be friends again?
Or maybe, being Gloominess, she wants to warn her about something.
[I'm Gloominess (Nekura). Forcing smiles tires me out.]
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Then there’s this Homura.
Nothing about her clothes is very different. She is wearing ribbons as Homura in the wraith universe does, but look closely: the ribbons are different. They have some wavy stripes on them, while Madoka’s ribbons are plain. She does not correspond to any known Clara Doll.
However, there’s mentioned to be a fifteenth Clara Doll that is not yet born: Ai, representing love. This could be her. Is it love for others? Or love for herself? I’m hoping it’s the latter, but very likely it’s love for Madoka and her friends. This would explain why she’s trying to fight Homucifer in the poster, as Homura believes that she’s a danger to everyone else.
How can this be? Well, here’s a few options:
- The Clara Dolls are grown-up familiars. They ate souls, and they became a copy of their witch. This is a process that was explained to us in the original series, where some magical girls are stated to farm familiars by letting them eat people so that they would grow souls/grief seeds.
- The Clara Dolls are not familiars, or wraiths, but instead a secret third thing. “What they are and the witch’s own magic are not well understood”, as said in the Rebellion art book. They could be magical constructs of a different kind, but I do think that this would get into overcomplicated explanations quickly, so I favor the familiar explanation.
- The Clara Dolls could be familiars, but instead of eating souls they’re simply powerful enough to change their shape. Their strength is equal to the strength of a magical girl…. when Homura was a witch, before Homura became something more. It could also be energy from the contracts making them stronger. Maybe it’s me being sentimental, but I don’t like the idea of Homura letting anyone’s soul be nommed on.
Now, before there’s a panic about how they’ll juggle fifteen extra characters, here’s a few thoughts:
- Just because they seem different doesn’t mean they’re actually different. It might be that the Clara Dolls are a way for Homura to present herself. As Vanity, she might show off more, or have dramatic flourishes like her throne and her dress. As Gloominess, it might be that she doesn’t believe that her plans will work, so she tries to do what makes her happy. It’s likely that the Clara Dolls are just extra ways to explore Homura’s character. They’re parts of her soul, after all, and right now she is extremely powerful. She might simply want to keep her true self away from humans.
- They could work like projections. Homura wants more bodies to work with, but she has to filter herself through the Dolls’ personalities. This could result in a lot of juicy character interactions, as the things she tries to keep hidden are closer to the surface.
- Will ‘Ai/Mystery Homura’ fight against Devil Homura? Very likely! How can this be when they’re the same person? Well, who hates Homura more than Homura? That’s right. Nobody. Anyone can fight and argue with their self, it’s just usually not on the level that a reality-warper like Homura can manage.
If this is true, there’s plenty of interesting directions they can take it.
- Because the Clara Dolls have a degree of separation from Homura, they can show other characters things that Homura herself has ignored or locked away. Bad memories, affection for her friends, the resentment she must feel - everything from concern to a cry for help can be plausibly shown through them as the actors.
- Manuke (Stupidity) is specifically more naive/sincere than the others. Maybe interacting with this Doll would show the Quintet that there’s something more going on than a Devil who wants to hurt other people.
- If Ai represents a love for other people, Ai can have a strange character arc where she learns to value Homura/herself, and become self-love.
- On the other hand, Ai can represent self-love from the start, and because Homura looks very fucking unhealthy in the trailer, she only wants to stop her because she’s hurting herself. This option plays into the themes of self-sacrifice and happiness, which I believe to be some of the major themes that they’re going for.
- The poster could be misleading and Ai ends up fighting everyone but Homura. I find this the funniest option.
- Homura can hug herself. It’s possible. In fact, every character can hug Homura 15 different times.
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Smiles are a Clara Doll’s default expression. We have yet to see Homura smile for real.
Is this going to get very ambiguous and confusing? Probably. But rewatching for details was the fun part in Rebellion, so I’m looking forward to it!
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vetted-gaza-funds · 1 month
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hey i'm not sure who to go to for this, but do you have resources on vetting a specific gofundme? most of the "vetted" ones i see on here just link to a tumblr post as "proof." my friend is trying to convince me to donate thousands to a gofundme that has a "deadline" of overnight, to me it seems scammy. i thought people in gaza can't access money immediately? can't find any other info about the fund online.
tl;dr below
Re: how to check up on a specific fundraiser, a lot of organizations running verification efforts will keep a spreadsheet of fundraisers that you can search by name, campaign title, social media handles, etc. That’s what I do when checking campaigns that are new on tumblr, since sometimes they were verified by OOB or another org before making a blog here. You can check my pinned post for some links. You can also find websites and/or social media accounts for some of the verification efforts that will explain who they are and how they verify people.
The ones linking to tumblr posts as proof are doing so because certain users are known to be Palestinian Arabic speakers who are personally vetting fundraisers. el-shab-hussein, nabulsi, or 90-ghost vouching for a fundraiser means that they have spoken personally to the organizer, seen ID documents, cross checked socials/phone numbers, sometimes even called them on the phone in real time and heard the war planes overhead. Hussein and Nairuz keep a spreadsheet as well that is also linked in my pinned post. It’s the source for most verifications on this blog.
All I can say is that you’ll just have to read what you can about the person or organization who did the vetting and use your own judgment. That’s all the vetters are asking folks to do. If this is a fundraiser where you can’t seem to find a verification source at all, dm me at palms-upturned and I’ll try to see what I can find quickly since the deadline is so urgent.
Re: the deadline, off the top of my head I don’t know of a fund with an overnight/today deadline, but I have seen a lot of funds with multiple deadlines. Needing to raise x amount of money to evacuate a member of the family who is in most urgent need, needing to raise a certain amount by a certain day in order to ensure that an evacuating child can be accompanied by an adult family member, needing to meet the goal by a certain day to make sure that the whole family isn’t separated, or in Bilal’s case recently, because he was raising funds from Germany on a visa which was not renewed simply because he is Palestinian, and needed to meet the goal before potentially being deported to Palestine, where he would no longer be able to raise funds. It’s not necessarily unusual for people to set a very sudden deadline or even multiple ones. Emergencies are constantly happening and the banks and travel agencies are also trying to squeeze as much money out of people as possible.
When people set these deadlines and goal amounts, they are also trying to take into account things like how long it will take to access the funds and how much of a cut will be taken by all the third parties down the line. Honestly, if there’s something that needs clarifying, you can usually just talk to people. Ask the organizer or one of the users who have been keeping in touch with them and promoting the fundraiser with updates. These folks are trying to be as transparent as possible and stay connected with anyone who can help them. They’re not going to dodge your questions. And they can explain best what sort of time/money constraints apply to them specifically. It differs depending on the banking situation, number/age of family members, offers and/or ultimatums from the travel agency, etc.
But the truth is that you and me both don’t have the know-how to verify this sort of thing ourselves any more than we could verify whether or not someone has cancer or is living on the streets or any number of reasons people launch fundraisers. Any time you donate to a cause like this, you’re putting some amount of trust in the organizer, the platform, and the people promoting the fund. But never in my life have I donated to a crowdfund that has been put through such intense scrutiny and as many layers of verification as Gaza fundraisers right now. Platforms like GFM are requiring constant updates about every penny spent of raised funds, and it still doesn’t guarantee that people’s verified fundraisers won’t be nuked and refunded without any real explanation to anyone involved. I’ve had I think five or six donations to various fundraisers refunded back to me at this point when I didn’t even want a refund. Zionists are mass reporting Gaza funds and smearing both the families and the people who are verifying and promoting them. Scammers pretending to be Gazan are not going to have a remotely easy time of it. Things are engineered to be as difficult as possible for people actually in Gaza.
tl;dr— if you need help with finding an actual source of verification, since this seems to be an emergency, dm me at palms-upturned for assistance. Obviously can’t say if this campaign is legit without knowing which one it is. Otherwise, you can check my pinned post for a list of orgs/spreadsheets/master lists of verified campaigns that you can cross reference. If you need more info on who’s doing the vetting and how, find the website and/or socmed page for the person or organization. You can also usually ask organizers/the people helping promote their campaigns directly for clarification on anything that’s confusing. But considering the harsh discrimination against Palestinians on crowdfunding platforms like GFM and PayPal, and the extra scrutiny their fundraisers are subjected to, you’re at a pretty low risk of being scammed most of the time. Sudden deadlines aren’t uncommon because emergencies are happening every day and the banks and travel agencies are squeezing as much money as possible out of people.
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lover-of-mine · 5 months
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Welcome to the use of blue and green with 911 couples is not confined to clothing and how I believe this applies to buddie since season 2, a masterpost. (this does contain an explanation of the use of blue and green in the more obvious way, the clothes, so even if you don't believe the other elements of the scene part, this could still bring some clarity on the way blue and green is important)
Okay, so, after 706 a lot of people said they thought about me with the buddie/bathena blue and green scene, and I LOVE THAT, but a few people also came to ask me to explain more about the blue and green in general and why that is important and I realized my blue and green thoughts are scattered into multiple posts because I did figure out more stuff since I wrote the first one and season 7 is giving me more things to support the 2 main color theory theories I have when it comes to buddie/Buck, so I decided I need to write one long post about it all, including thoughts on 706 specifically.
Okay, so easy pattern to spot first, the blue and green thing is used with a lot of couples throughout the show, core couples, adjacent couples, random people in calls, the blue and green is used in a major piece of clothing in a couple, a shirt, a jacket, a dress, after s6 the use of pants was introduced more explicitly, and that has transferred to s7, but it is something heavily used since s2 (I can't find a conclusive example in s1 and the first obvious example is madney's first scene in 206) (this will have a bunch of tiny images because I'm trying to stay within the image limit, but if you click on them you can zoom in if tumblr doesn't decide to hellsite, I made them high quality enough)
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And it is not just about meant-to-be couples, it's literally just a way to exemplify romantic connection. And while it is used a lot with most of the couples we see, the easiest couple to track is madney, since they have a lot of blue and green scenes, tracking back all the way down to their first scene, but bathena also have quite a few scenes. I love the scene at the station in 308 (last column, 3rd row down) because the cutout of kid Bobby makes it so there's a double blue Bobby there.
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So the clothes element is very easy to track. It is a very real aspect of the show. And that is interesting when you consider the actual color theory aspect of it, because blue and green are analogous colors, which means they are right next to each other in the color wheel, and that's a color scheme used to create a harmonious look, it's about cohesion, creating visual unity, and it is what this accomplishes, the couples look balanced even if we don't fully register why, they just naturally work well together and that translates even if you don't know color theory.
This is the part we know exists in the show, but the thing is, I don't believe the show only uses that with the clothes, and again, madney is the easiest way to track that.
I noticed this while making a 512 set for the hiatus rewatch since I was focusing on the scenery to pick the shots I wanted because something about that episode is that it is green in nature since it is a Saint Patrick's Day episode. But everything about madney that episode is blue and green even when madney isn't dressed in blue and green. Pretty much everything about it has blue or green elements.
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Maddie is wearing blue in the video, Chim is wearing green when he watches it, she's in blue while she's alone (even her hospital gown is blue, and that's not a common thing for the show), he's in green when he's alone, so we are still in the color scheme, there is a lot of green in the background that makes Chim and his vest stand out, we have green walls, that green bench, the blue red sox merch on the walls. But when they meet again, they are in neutral-colored clothing, contrasting with the background, and when Maddie tells Chim she wants to go home, both of them have blue and green shirts that are covered by a jacket, so the blue and green are not a focal point even if it's there, probably because they are not back in a place where they can get back together yet, and they are explicitly in blue and green in 601 when they do get back together.
They also did the whole make the episode blue and green with 706.
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The backgrounds are very blue or green or both, a lot of the people are wearing blue or green, Maddie's phone is green, Chim's car is blue, there is a lot of blue and green happening there.
Something else about madney being blue and green is that their house has a lot of blue and green decorations. So, I definitely wanna say that the blue and green are being completed by other elements of the scene.
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But I obviously have examples with other couples.
While doing the rewatch sets for 606 I noticed there are a few examples using Henren and other elements of the scene, 606 is also the episode that allowed me to include pants into this madness.
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The thing about henren is that they don't have a lot of blue and green scenes, the 2 we had before s7, because s7 did gave us a few more, are in when they decide on fostering and when Eva comes back the last time, but since their color palette is based on patterns a lot, I decided maybe I should expand my definition of what counted, that gives us one of the flashbacks, because Karen's pants are patterned in green and Hen's shirt is patterned in blue, they also have Hen in green pants for one of the dates and there's the blue lighting, there's the scene with Hen in a blue hoodie and the green background. So more elements of the scene were being employed there.
Another couple is Eddie and Shannon. I will be honest, it took me a WHILE to clock they had an explicit blue and green moment in the form of Chris' birth. BUT, looking at them season 2 and the flashbacks in Eddie begins, they have moments where Eddie is blue or green and Shannon has blue and green detailing, her jewelry, her nails, her car, background of a scene. Also when they are fighting about Eddie reenlisting, they keep switching holding blue and green stuff. Shannon has a blue cup, Eddie is holding a green bottle, the rag on Eddie's hand is blue, the oven mitt next to Shannon is green, so even though Shannon is never a fully blue or green character, she always has blue and green accents.
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Randon addon, but Thomas and Mitchell, the gay couple from Buck, Actually that is the couple that shows Buck what love is supposed to look like, they have a lot of blue and green details in their montage, the car, the driveway, the transition from a green cake to a blue cake, I just love that.
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Now that we have all of this established, let's talk blue and green applied to buddie.
So, using the established, just the top, point of focus of the outfit, buddie has 3 blue and green outfits, technically 4, but we will talk about the hangar later, because I have a lot to say lol, the loft scene in 613, the station scene in 617, the hangar scene in 704, and the dispatch scene, the street scene, and the wedding in 706 (I will also talk more about 706 later)
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One thing about buddie in blue and green is that they tend to have similar shades to past scenes with past love interests.
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I don't know why they repeated the shooting combo, I guess it's just because Taylor's greens tended to be less earthy than Eddie's usual shades, but, I was scrolling through bucktaylor blue and green scenes to see if I could find a match for the hangar, and I do think that works, but I was fully ready to go full delusional here and say Buck's hoodie in 706 matches Shannon's nails in 207, because they do, BUT, that one seems to be a double kill and I don't have to sound all that crazy, because it seems like it is a bucktaylor combo from 509 too (the lighting on the loft is obviously different from two scenes in natural sunlight, but they are similar enough)
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(Wait last minute addition that you don't know it's a last minute addition and can read more about here, but all thought s6, Buck and Eddie have matching blue and green phone cases, and the 706 scene seems to also somewhat match the shade of the phone cases from last season)
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And these are the explicit ones, I would say the 706 scene is even more on the nose since bathena are also in blue and green right next to them.
Now, for other elements of the scene tho, we can go back down to the beginning. As in the you can have my back any day scene.
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(Yes, I know the blue is because of the sirens, and it will eventually be red, but since red is such a prominent color for Buck, I can't really mind that all that much because I also have a color-theory theory that deals with the idea that Buck is red in scenes about doing the right thing about love and what more right for Buck than Eddie?)
But since I'm trying to stay within the image limit, let's rapid-fire some scenes here. If we ignore the uniform (I am choosing to because they don't have a lot of room with the uniform, it is what it is, and sometimes a scene will happen in the firehouse) Eddie is wearing blue after the tsunami and the will reveal, Buck's wearing blue after Chim goes after Maddie, Buck's wearing blue in the kitchen talk in 511 (and yes he's wearing blue because Taylor is wearing green, but he's still in blue), the shirt Buck has under the red jacket during the breakdown is blue, Buck is wearing something blue(ish) when they talk about the couches, Eddie is wearing blue on the poker date, Buck is wearing green on the cemetery. In the Carla scene, when Eddie shows up, they're not in the kitchen, and the backgrounds behind them are somewhat neutral. But funnily enough, it's only green behind Eddie there. (if you read my eddie fell first essay, you know I will die saying this is the moment that Eddie is done for so, love when an insane thought solidifies another lol), after the tsunami, we have green scrubs dude behind Eddie when Eddie sees Buck, even though most scrubs in the show are blue and everything behind Eddie is white, we have Buck and the blue of the tent, when they turn around, there's the green thingie behind Eddie and Chris, and the scrubs behind Buck are blue. Grocery store, the toilet papers behind Buck are blue and the outside along with the flowers behind Eddie are very green. Shooting, whatever that green thing behind Eddie is, Mehta's uniform, more blue uniforms, and a green medical person. 511 I just think are funny because Buck is wearing blue in the kitchen but everything about Eddie is white, and that's a fun contrast to the Carla scene and 517 is funny the way one side of Chris' room is mostly green and red and the other is yellow and blue and how Buck is on the green side and Eddie is on the blue (including his shirt). And the poker date, Eddie is in blue and the tables and chairs are green.
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Considering using the pants, we also have the post-tsunami talk, the will reveal, and the 504 talk where Eddie has green pants on. Sure, the post tsunami talk, Eddie is both blue and green and there are no blue elements on Buck, but the will reveal, Eddie is both blue and green and the wall behind Buck is blue, and the 504 talk, Eddie has green pants and Buck has a blue hoodie on, considering the way the season 6 had the pants being in used with henren in 606 and with the girls from the oil well (both queer couples, I might add), I kinda wanna say that the 504 talk is traditionally blue and green lol
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We also have my Roman Empire, aka the cemetery scene.
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Because here's the thing, the sky is only blue behind Eddie and Buck is dressed in green. And also considering the way that they were being pretty consistent with Eddie being green and Buck being blue and the general breakup feelings surrounding the cemetery scene, the fact that bucktaylor switched colors mid-relationship, aka, when Buck tells her he kissed someone else, this is very interesting to me, because the colors in that scene feel like something that was accomplished on post-production, so they are like that on purpose.
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This is also something that is used in the gym scene in 705, because Buck is wearing a green coat and Eddie completes the blue and green with the towel and the bottle, and considering green is Buck there is something wrong color and Buck is beating himself up for lying to Eddie, the switch in colors when applied to Buck usually means something.
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With all this, let's talk blue and green in 706. Bathena is in 2 different blue and green outfits, the Buckley parents are in blue and green, bucktommy and buddie.
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The bucktommy blue and green is very interesting because for one I had to swatch the color of Tommy's shirt and also because when talking about the blue and green in general, the shades tend to match, so to have Buck in a very light mint green and Tommy in a very dark, almost black blue is... a choice, especially considering that bucktommy did match during their date in 705, and Buck is in green, Buck in green is never a good sign (meta on that here), and considering Buck switches colors during crisis, I'm curious as to why they already switched the colors for them, since green is Buck's breakup color.
And the buddie of it all, well, they spent the whole episode matching, literally with the costumes for the bachelor party, but they also stay in their blue and green combo for the duration.
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And to have buddie matching even in the bachelor party when the dude Buck is dating is there during the madney wedding episode is definitely a choice, even more, when you consider the way that Eddie is the one who is supposed to be the third wheel, in the costume design of it all Tommy was the one who was the odd one out, and considering the general married behavior buddie was exhibiting during the episode, it's a choice.
And since I'm already here, let's talk hangar scene.
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For starters, with this scene, we had a blue and green scene for buddie 3 episodes in a row, which is something on its own, BUT, I will say that I watched the clip of this scene before 704 aired and said "oh, buddie just went canon", because here's the thing, for starters they are in blue and green and Tommy is in shades of beige, so the color on their clothes is the focus, but they are not really the focus, and they do match, but we have to consider the way Buck is wearing a maroon hoodie under his blue and Eddie is wearing a black jacket over his green. That clearly meant some sort of development was coming they're just not fully there yet. For me at least. Because the show has Eddie in the army green armor and Buck in the red jacket of love, and to have Eddie in the army green but with something over it, not using it to protect himself is something, and Buck not being in his brighter reds is also something.
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To have this was very interesting for me, Eddie most of all because he's wearing black a lot and I have theories but I can't figure out why. But those are all colors used when Eddie is protecting himself and Buck is trying to understand something, so interesting. And then there's the actual dialogue of the scene "wait, you're not thinking about jumping ship?" "uh, no, I'm just, you know, keeping my options fluid." There is literally no more on the nose way to say don't jump ship than to literally have Eddie say don't jump ship. All that paired with the very obvious blue and green, definitely meant a plan was just set in motion for me.
I will link my Buck and the use of green and red again if you feel like reading more color theory theories. And also a theory about the use of blue and yellow this season.
Anyway, I think this is all, if you read this I love you 💜
tagging the ones of you who asked me about this or interacted with the post I asked about this: @dangerpronebuddie @missmagooglie @steadfastsaturnsrings @millymaki @inell @bella-bothered-and-bewildered @sparkedblaze @frihetstyrke @ilostyou @your-catfish-friend @estheticpotaeto @marmarthehatterverse @planetlet263 @mirrorbuck @lolpuppy
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readsaboutreid · 2 months
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Permanent Solution (part II) | S.R.
contains: lots of discussion of suicide, other typical criminal minds violence, heavy heavy angst but a happy ending (i promise!), MORGAN GETS REDEEMED
look i'm sorry to put spencer and reader through so much pain T-T but also i wanted to use my own negative thoughts in a better way than just stewing in them so i adapted them to fit this
i also had someone request that i tag them so i guess if you'd like for me to tag you in future posts lmk and i'll add you onto a taglist! when you request just specify if you want to be tagged for a specific part 2 (or continuation of a specific story) or tagged for any future fics :)
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Spencer jolted awake, the faint ringing of his alarm clock dragging him out of sleep. He sat up and rubbed his sore neck, wondering why his alarm sounded like it was in a different room. And then the memories from the previous night came rushing back to him, and he realized that it sounded that way because it was, in fact, coming from a different room. He had fallen asleep on the couch, Dr. Mewshroom taking up (Y/N)’s usual place wrapped in his arms. He checked his phone, no missed calls from her (but about 20 from Garcia, and only one voicemail, also from Garcia), and the clock on its little digital screen told him it was 6:30 AM. He got up and went into the bedroom, checking to see if maybe she had decided against waking him. Anxiety rushed through his veins when he saw the empty bed, and he called her phone again, which rang four times before going to voicemail.
“Hi, you’ve reached the voicemail of Dr. (Y/L/N), I can’t come to the phone right now but if you leave your name and number, I’ll return your call as soon as I am able. Thanks!” Beep.
He swallowed, struggling around the lump forming in his throat. He got a call from Hotch right as he started getting dressed for a day off (much earned after their last case). “I’m sorry, Reid, but I need you and (Y/L/N) here immediately. We have a new case, local, and we need all hands on deck for this one. I need you two in the briefing room in 20 minutes.” Spencer groaned internally at the prospect of back-to-back cases but confirmed that he’d be there. Then, he covered for (Y/N)’s absence. He said that she was sick and couldn’t leave the bathroom for longer than five minutes at a time and that seemed to be all the convincing Hotch would need. “Since the case is local that’s fine, she can join us when she recovers. But get here ASAP, Reid.” Click.
Spencer took a deep breath to calm the anxiety bubbling in his gut and chest. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, but it hadn’t happened since they had moved in together five months ago. Since she had stopped taking The Walk. He took a deep breath and assured himself that the chances of (Y?N) being missing were slim-to-none.
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Spencer walked through the glass doors of the BAU and hurried to the round table, the last one of the team to enter. He nodded to Garcia, Prentiss (who looked like she had a very fun mystery date the previous night), Hotch, and Rossi. He pointedly ignored the greetings of both JJ and Morgan, the latter rolling his eyes slightly at the passive aggressive behavior.
“Reid, glad you could make it. Okay JJ, fill us in,” Hotch nodded to JJ, who stepped forward and placed a file in front of each of them.
"Where's (Y/N)?" Penelope asked Spencer, giving him a confused and worried look. He avoided her gaze as he muttered something about her having a stomach bug while he took his seat.
“Last night, a body turned up in the Anacostia River, near the 11th Street bridge,” JJ began as she placed files in front of each of them. Spencer’s blood ran cold, and his stomach dropped at her words. Not there, anywhere but there.
“It’s the third body they’ve found this month, and the timeframe between bodies seems to be around the same each time, one week. All the victims are female, mid-to-late 20s, and all three had a history of multiple suicide attempts," she explained, pulling up some of the crime scene photos on the projector in front of them.
“Hold up, JJ,” Morgan interjected, “if all three victims have a history of suicidal tendencies, how do we know these aren’t just run-of-the-mill suicides?”
“Each body was disposed of in a large black trash bag,” Hotch explained.
“That and they found evidence of torture as well as ligature marks on the wrist and ankle of each of the victims,” she elaborated, switching the slide to show some of the coroner’s photos. Electrical burns littered the torso of the victim on the slide, and Spencer's stomach churned at the sight. She looked so much like (Y/N) it was uncanny.
“Each victim has a similar build and they've all got the same hair cut and color,” Prentiss observed, “maybe a surrogate for the Unsub’s real target?” Please, no.
"Could be a mother or girlfriend," Rossi speculated. "Do the DC police have any idea of where he's taking his victims from, or is it just the dump site that they know? And are there any witnesses?"
"Until last night, the victims had all been taken from their homes with no witnesses on what the police assume were the same nights the previous victims' bodies had been dumped," JJ answered, "but last night he seems to have escalated and abducted someone straight from the bridge itself according to a nearby eyewitness, a man who had been out for a late night jog. They found this—" she clicked to the next slide, "at the scene, along with the victim's cell phone, both of which have been bagged as evidence and are at the local precinct."
Spencer’s world came to a crashing, burning halt. In the image on the screen was a rather generic looking, but still all too familiar, green knit cardigan and black cell phone with a cracked screen. No one else had seemed to put it together yet, except perhaps Rossi, who had shifted his gaze to Spencer.
"Do we know the identity of the most recent abductee—" Prentiss had started to ask before Spencer had to stand and run to the trash can to vomit.
"That's some stomach virus," Rossi mused, giving Spencer a concerned and knowing look.
"Reid? Are you alri—" Prentiss was cut off again, this time by Hotch.
"Prentiss, Morgan, go to the location where the bodies were found, and the most recent victim abducted. Track down the eye witness through any means possible and interview him. Rossi and JJ, you two head to the precinct. Reid, my office. Now." Hotch issued the orders with a deeper sense of urgency than usual. Spencer stood and shakily walked to Hotch's office after the rest of the team had hurried off, and as soon as Hotch entered and closed the door behind him Spencer’s legs gave out, leaving him to collapse onto his knees.
"Talk,” Hotch said, his tone dangerously quiet.
"(Y/N)'s not sick," he managed to choke out between the gasping sobs that now wracked his chest. "Di-didn't— come home— last night," his words were punctuated by gasping breaths. "M-my sweater— wearing my sweater—" he couldn't breathe, and his vision was like looking through a tunnel, the edges getting darker and pushing in more and more with each second, he struggled to inhale. He shouldn't have gone home last night. He should have gone after her.
"And you have reason to believe she was at the 11th Street bridge?" Hotch questioned.
"She used to walk there every night," Spencer jumped at the sound of Garcia's hollow voice coming from behind him. He hadn't even noticed her come in through his panicked haze. "When she first started here. It's why she always looked so tired those first five months, because she'd barely sleep. She'd walk there and pace back and forth along the bridge. Sometimes she'd just sit on the railing."
"Sh-she hasn't been there in months," Spencer's voice was hoarse, "but last night she— something happened that upset her and she walked off—" another round of sobs forced their way out. "Hotch, he's gonna—" Spencer reached for the trash can next to Hotch's desk and vomited again, and again.
"Spencer," Hotch knelt in front of the young agent, gently moving the trash can to the side. "Deep breaths. I know you're terrified. If you need to take yourself off the case, don't worry. We'll find her."
"Off the case?" He panted, trying to steady his breathing.
"Well you're clearly in no state to be doing much of anything. I don't think anyone on the team would blame you for having to step back on this one," Hotch reasoned.
"What? No, no I've got to find her!" He felt his head clearing a bit as his breathing finally returned to a normal rhythm, his vision slowly returning until he could see the full room properly.
"Reid, are you sure that’s a good idea—"
"Hotch," Spencer interrupted, "I can't just do nothing while he tor—" he reached for the trashcan and vomited yet again at the thought of what the Unsub was going to do to her, what he probably already was doing to her; he was honestly surprised there was anything left for his stomach to throw up at this point. “I can’t just sit by and watch, knowing that every second she’s there with him she’s being subjected to one sort of torture or another.”
Hotch paused and observed Spencer briefly before he rose to his feet and offered Spencer a hand to help him stand, as well. “Take a few minutes to compose yourself and then meet me at the SUV downstairs. We’ll head to the precinct together and you can fill me in on what happened that upset her last night. It might help with the victimology, which you’re going to be working on with me for now since you know (Y/N) better than anyone else.”
“Thank you, Hotch,” Spencer managed to force out, the words quiet and trembling. Hotch left the office and Garcia lingered, giving Spencer a look of pure sorrow.
“I— I’m so sorry, Spencer,” she began, an echo of their conversation outside of the bar last night.
“Garcia, this isn’t your fault,” he responded, continuing the reprisal.
“When you didn’t call me last night I—I just figured that you two had—I don't know—kissed and made up and fallen asleep, I didn’t realize that she never even made it home,” her voice broke on the very last word, and her hand shot up to her mouth as sobs began to escape. Spencer’s legs were still shaky, but he managed to cross the room to her and give her a tight embrace. “I—no, you shouldn’t have to comfort me right now, Spencer, I’m sorry!”
“Consider this me returning the favor from yesterday,” he muttered, his own voice tearful while he kept holding on to her. He swallowed around the lump in his throat.
“Spencer, you have to find her before he can—”
“I know. I will,” he said, trying his very best to sound determined. Instead, his voice came out sounding more like that of a frightened boy than a grown FBI agent.
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“What’s going on with Reid?” Emily asked Derek, giving him a quizzical look from the passenger seat of the SUV.
“Last night I sort of went off on (Y/N) after one too many glasses of whiskey and I may have told her nobody wanted her there,” he confessed, shame swirling in his head as he drove. He didn’t really dislike her; he found her demeanor slightly off-putting, but he had felt the same way about Reid when he first joined the team, and she was an excellent profiler, so the least he could do was give (Y/N) the same benefit of the doubt he had given Reid. “Garcia tore me a new one after he had come back into the bar and told us that she had broken things off between them because of my...outburst.”
“Damn it, Morgan,” Emily muttered, flipping through the file in her hands. “You see, this is why we can’t have nice things!”
“Look, look, I know I was wrong about what I said to her, but I can’t turn back the clock. I’ll just have to find her and apologize once she’s feeling better.” They approached the 11th Street bridge, and he stopped the car and put it in park. They both stepped out into the crisp morning air, a light fog slightly obscuring their vision.
“According to the witness statement, this guy was out for a late-night jog when he called the non-emergency police line after seeing a man toss what the was presumed to be trash into the river in a giant black trash bag,” Emily recited what she had read from the file on the drive there. “But he called 911 when he said he heard what sounded like the start of a scream and then saw the struggle before saying the woman went entirely limp. Report says he tried to catch up with the Unsub, who then got into an unmarked black van and drove away.”
"Looks like the CSI team may have missed something," Derek called out to Emily as he caught a glimpse of what looked like an earring and some dried blood under some fallen leaves on the bridge. He snapped a glove onto his hand, and when he pushed the leaves aside he felt his blood run cold. He'd recognize this earring anywhere. "Oh, no."
"I-I like your earrings," a soft, small voice spoke from behind Derek and Penelope as they did their morning flirting routine. They both turned and saw the newest member of the team looking shyly at Penelope.
"Oh these? Thanks! You know, I could make you a pair if you'd like," Garcia smiled at (Y/N), whose eyes widened in panic.
"O-oh! No, don't worry, y-you don't n-n-need to trouble yourself like that!" The young agent hurried off in a panic.
"That was...weird," Derek mused to himself as he walked to his desk.
"I guess she decided to take up Garcia's offer on a pair of her own after all," he muttered, his voice sorrowful.
"What'd you find, Morgan?" Emily asked as she made her way over. "Is that one of Garcia's earrings? How'd that get here?"
"She had offered to make a pair for (Y/N) right around the time she joined the team," Derek explained before looking up to find Emily's face falling at the realization.
"Oh, god," she gasped, her hand covering her mouth. "Bag that, I'll call Hotch and let him know what we found."
"I'll also call Garcia, ask her to get the address of the witness. We got to get (Y/N) out of there ASAP." Derek pulled out his phone and dialed Garcia.
"What, Derek?" She snapped, and Derek had to fight every urge in his body to playfully argue with her to try to lessen her anger with him. There were more pressing things he had to talk about right now.
"Hey, Garcia, we found something at the scene," he began, "it was, uh, an earring you had made for (Y/L/N) from the looks of it. Got a little bit of dried blood on the post." He took in a deep breath before adding on, "I'm sorry." The line was silent for a minute before she finally spoke again.
"Poor Reid," she whispered, her voice tearful. He could hear her take a shaky breath before she asked, "what, uh, what do you need me to do?"
"I need the address of the witness, a man named Jonathan Levi," he he explained.
"Yeah, uh, yeah I can get that for you right now," she said, her voice growing stronger. He could almost see her wiping her tears from her cheeks as he heard her sniffle on the other end. "I'm sending it to your phone now. And Derek?"
"Yeah, baby girl?"
"You find this son of a bitch," she said before the line disconnected.
"We will," he said to himself.
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"Prentiss," Hotch's voice came through Emily's cell phone, "what have you been able to learn from the crime scene?"
"Uh, well not very much, yet. Morgan's calling Garcia to get the address of the witness so we can interview him," she answered, trying to keep her voice from sounding shaky. She failed.
''But?" Hotch pressed.
"...but we did find an earring with some dried blood on the post that was missed under some leaves," she added, swallowing nearly audibly. "Earrings that—that Morgan thinks Garcia had made for (Y/L/N) a little while back."
"Thanks, Prentiss. I've got Reid with me, I'll let him know what you've found," Hotch said before the line disconnected.
"—yeah, baby girl?" She heard from where Morgan stood, followed by a determined, "We will."
"Prentiss!" He called out, heading to the black SUV. "Garcia sent me the address, can you drive?" He tossed her the keys and she caught them, jogging over to the drivers' seat.
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"Reid, you doing okay?" Rossi asked him as they rushed to the home they had finally tracked the Unsub to.
"I—I just—," he stammered, swallowing the lump in his throat. "I just hope we get to her in time." His voice was barely above a whisper.
"We know he keeps them for a week. It's only been three days," Spencer felt Rossi's hand land on his shoulder. "She's a fighter, Spencer. You know that better than anyone else here."
The address Garcia had tracked down for them led them to the fairly large but still dilapidated house of a man named Andrew Warren, a CNA at a local mental facility who lost his parents in a double suicide as a child, and then his older sister to suicide a month ago after she had gone through multiple rounds of ECT as a teenager in the 1990s.
The other SUV containing Prentiss, JJ, and Morgan arrived at the house slightly before theirs and Spencer could see as his coworkers stopped the car and raced towards the door of the house. Morgan kicked down the door and raced inside right as Hotch put their vehicle in park and Spencer was out of the door before he could hear any of Hotch's orders. He didn't care about orders, right now. All he cared about was getting the love of his life to safety.
As he ran over the threshold of the house, he heard shouting coming from up a bunch of old stairs. He took the steps two at a time and he went up each floor until he finally reached what seemed to be the third floor landing. The shouting became more distinct as he approached and he could make out Morgan negotiating with the Unsub.
"She's weak," the Unsub spat, followed by a whimper from (Y/N) that sent a stab of pure fear through his gut. "Weak members of our species like her need to be removed from the gene pool."
"Drop the knife, Andrew," Spencer heard Morgan say in a calm voice as he rounded the final corner and the entire situation came into his view. The Unsub had (Y/N) in front of him with a knife held to her throat, both of them standing before a large, open window. She was in nothing but her underwear and bra and had multiple electrical burns marring her skin. (Y/N) made eye contact with Spencer and tears started streaking down her cheeks as she mouthed I'm sorry to him, sending a crack through his chest.
"Don't come any closer!" The Unsub screamed as he finally noticed Spencer approaching with his gun drawn. Spencer's eyes widened as he slowly put his gun back into the holster and then raised his hands just as slowly. He halted his steps and took a deep breath.
"It's okay, Andrew," Spencer attempted to sound calm and collected through his panic. "I'm just trying to help."
Spencer looked around the room at JJ and Prentiss who were flanking Morgan in the center, both with their guns drawn. He could hear Hotch and Rossi approaching behind him and he turned and softly told them, "stay back." He then started slowly approaching again as he turned to the Unsub. "I know what you've been through, Andrew," he said, his voice steadier than he thought it would be.
"You lost your parents in a double suicide when you and your sister were little. Your foster parents would torment you and your sister and blamed you both for the way you reacted to the trauma you had been through and your sister ended up institutionalized after a suicide attempt at 17. Once she got out and took custody of you when she turned 18 and you were 16, she had trouble being able to keep up with everything. She started harming herself," Spencer took another shaky breath as he slowly continued forward, watching as tears welled in Andrew's eyes. "And then you lost her, too, when she jumped from the 11th Street bridge a month ago."
"Sh-she was weak, just like my mom and dad." Andrew responded, but his voice cracked and faltered.
"No, Andrew, they weren't weak. They were sick," Spencer reasoned with him. "Your sister was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, just like your parents. She was sick and in pain. She wasn't weak."
"She was weak," Andrew said. "She left me here all alone!"
"I know," Spencer said, the slightest amount of relief sparking within him as the knife at (Y/N)'s throat began to lower. "I know she did. You can't blame yourself, though, Andrew. It's not your fault. They needed help that you couldn't give by yourself, and that's not your fault. Just let her go and we can get you the help that you need." He pleaded with him, his voice wavering slightly as he looked (Y/N) in the eye again and saw all of the fear and pain radiating from them.
"No," Andrew responded as tears streaked down his face. "I can't—" As he raised the knife back to (Y/N)'s neck, Spencer heard the sound of gunfire and watched in terror as Andrew started to fall backward with his arms still around (Y/N). Spencer tried to run to her but didn't make it before they fell through the open window.
"No!" Morgan shouted as he lunged forward, grabbing (Y/N)'s hand right as she fell backward out the window. Andrew's lifeless body plummeted to the ground beneath them, landing with a crunch. "Hold on, (Y/L/N), I've got you!" He called to her as she dangled from the window, his hand her only lifeline.
Spencer rushed forward to his side before reaching his own hand out the window toward (Y/N), and together they pulled her back up through the window. They moved back and Morgan closed the window as Spencer wrapped (Y/N) into his arms while she sobbed in relief.
"I'm so sorry," she muttered into his chest over and over. Spencer just held her close and kept assuring her that she had nothing to apologize for.
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I sat on the back lip of the ambulance, a blanket around my shoulders in some borrowed clothes. Spencer refused to leave my side until he was called away by Hotch. "I'll be right back, okay, love?" He looked at me before giving my forehead a soft, gentle kiss and then walked over to our boss.
"(Y/N)," I heard from a few feet away. I turned and was faced with Derek Morgan.
"M-Morgan," I stammered as my eyes widened. "I-I'm so sorry—"
"Stop, (Y/N). You don't have to apologize to me for anything," he started, "I'm the one who needs to be apologizing for my behavior."
"I—you just kept me from being dragged out of a window and likely breaking my neck. You don't owe me anything. I owe you my life." I muttered, looking at the ground.
"You don't owe me anything. I did the same thing for you that I would have done for any other member of this team," he looked at me while I kept my gaze on the ground in front of me. "Look at me, (Y/N)." I looked at him and he looked me right in the eye as he said, "my behavior the other night was uncalled for. "This team is a family, and you are a vital part of that family. We need you, Spencer needs you, and I'm so, so sorry. I hope that you'll let me try to make it up to you in the future."
Vital. He called me vital. That word clanged through me and I broke down crying again. He wrapped me in a bear hug and apologized again. "Th-thank you, Derek." I said, my voice small as I hesitantly wrapped my arms around him in return.
"I'm sorry, (Y/N)," he said one more time before releasing me. The paramedics approached and asked if anyone was going to accompany me to the hospital.
"Reid!" Morgan called to Spencer, who had just finished up with Hotch. Spencer raced back to us, his eyes widening and growing concerned when he saw my fresh tears.
"What's wrong?! Is everything okay?" He asked as he gently grabbed me by the shoulders and looked into my eyes. I closed my eyes and nodded, unable to form any words. Vital. I'd never felt that I was wanted or needed anywhere I'd been in my life, much less vital to anyone or anything.
"Paramedics wanna know if you're gonna accompany her to the hospital," Morgan explained, and Spencer agreed in a heartbeat. I was then loaded onto a gurney and into the ambulance, one of the paramedics and Spencer following behind.
Vital. As I looked at Spencer, he grabbed by hand and pulled it up to his lips and placed a soft kiss on the back. "I'm so happy you're alive," Spencer whispered to me, his hand moving to stroke some of my hair out of my face. "I love you, (Y/N)."
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@busy-buzzing here's part 2 sorry it took so long!
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doublel27 · 22 days
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I have to say, I really love the balance and parallels The Trainee is pulling off with their interns. Specifically though, the focus on BaMhee and Ryan as our central leads, because they directly parallel each other in this story.
Of our interns, BaMhee and Ryan are the ones that didn’t really mean to be there. BaMhee is there following Tae with no real aspirations of her own outside of being close to him. Ryan is there because his only friend encouraged him to try it and he got pulled into the wrong interview. They both show up relatively aimless and without a real objective which is contrasted by Tae and Pie who are so focused on their dreams/objectives they have a hard time seeing around their own plans. Pah has a dream, like Pie and Tae, but he lacks confidence in his ability to complete his dream, in the way that Ryan struggles with his confidence.
And throughout the story, they’ve allowed Ryan and BaMhee to start finding themselves within the story. Both have become more involved and valuable to production as time has gone on. In the early episodes, BaMhee was usually texting Tae and Ryan was often silent and confused. Now BaMhee takes initiative and makes her own decisions. Ryan has taken to coming up with his own ideas and sharing them, as well as getting involved in scene set up and being better at handling extras.
Both had very significant revelations in today’s episode about who they actually want to be or might be that were explored in 4/4.
BaMhee realized she was still in love with Tae and while she likes Judy, she doesn’t like her enough to want to have a full relationship. I was always worried that BaMhee liked the attention and the confidence of Judy because we didn’t get to see much of Judy beyond her work persona (unlike Jane who we saw behind the curtain much earlier). I actually loved BaMhee’s speech to Judy about how no one person is an exact fit (which is why you cannot survive on one relationship alone - romantic, familial, friend - a person needs multiple people) and how both Tae and Judy have things that fit her and things that don’t. But it’s the love and feelings that she has for Tae that make her want to try.
And I find this evolved for BaMhee because it often felt, in the early eps, that she just wanted to be with Tae to be with Tae and not for her relationship with Tae. Like it didn’t feel like a thing she was choosing so much as clinging to. I know she knows that because she told Tae flat out what she wants, which BaMhee never did before. She laid out she doesn’t want grand gestures or big surprises; she just wants time.
Directly paralleled with Ryan, who has now had Jane in his home, and is finding his footing. We saw it some the last two episodes, but this episode had Ryan contemplating his dreams, and who he is, and what persona he might wear, or not. I loved the throwback to the interview and him explaining while he didn’t want to be porridge with side dishes then, just a person in the background supporting, now he does want to be porridge with side dishes because he wants to figure out what fits him best. Who he wants to be as a grown up.
I love that Jane pointed out earlier in the episode that no “adult” has it all together and even asked if people need big dreams. His own contemplation of his dreams and where he is over where he thought he might be was a lovely reflection in the conversation with Ryan. It’s beautiful how they talk about these things.
And @lurkingshan has a beautiful post on BaMhee’s relationships with Judy and Tae respectively, and how Ryan and Jane are slower, but Ryan and Jane are also deeper. Judy didn’t really listen to BaMhee, not really, or ask probing questions. Judy and BaMhee both operated separately, sometimes in concert and sometimes in opposition, whereas Jane and Ryan communicate about ideas and feelings and dreams. Another contrast I’ve enjoyed was Jane let Ryan in first, with the feeding and bringing him home, before he crossed into Ryan’s world in episode 10. Which is a contrast to Judy showing up at BaMhee’s family restaurant (entering her space first) and having BaMhee feed her while we still know very little about Judy. Yes she talks BaMhee out, later, but she doesn’t ask first. Jane always asks. It’s a very cool contrast of how both of their relationships with their mentors have helped clarify things for BaMhee and Ryan in multiple ways, while being very different.
Anyway, while I am sad my sapphic plans didn’t pan out, I still love this show dearly and it’s so well written and beautifully shot.
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adobe-outdesign · 6 months
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Kung Fu Panda 4 Rewrite Thing
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Been chewing on this movie for a while now and wanted to take a shot at improving it. Some parts are a bit rough but I think this gets the general idea across.
As a rule, I'm trying to keep most of the characters and elements/plot beats in place rather than spinning things off in a completely unrelated direction. I also am aware of the restrictions placed on this movie, such as an unwillingness to rehire high-profile VAs and runtime limitations. This is just meant to be a "what if" kind of thing. That said:
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We open with a stylized sequence of Po telling the story of his and the Five's latest battle. As it ends it's revealed he's at the grand opening of Mr. Ping's brand new bigger, better noodle shop location, talking to the customers.
As one of them asks where the Five are now, Po explains that they got summoned to their own individual missions, but they'll be back soon.
(Yes I am still having them be MIA, as Po needs to be alone with Zhen for part of the movie. However, they'll only gone for the first part of this rewrite and for a very specific plot-related reason.)
(The thing with Po needing to give up his title of Dragon Warrior makes no sense for multiple reasons, so let's just drop that plot point entirely. I get that it's meant to tie into the "change" moral, but I'd rather have Po imparting this lesson onto Zhen instead of learning it himself, as otherwise it undermines the character growth he had in 3.
Also, Po isn't carrying the staff around with him constantly in this rewrite, as it looks a bit silly and isn't plot relevant here.)
A messenger shows up to report that the Jade Palace is under attack. Po decides to rush over just in case Shifu needs backup... which he does, because he's being kidnapped in a small one of those magic-proofed cages from the actual film.
(Shifu being kidnapped was tossed around in the writing room originally and I want to keep it in this rewrite because it A) gives Shifu something to do, and B) I want to allow Zhen to openly be working with the Chameleon in order to help flesh out her character and avoid the lackluster plot twist, meaning she'll need new leverage against Po later on.)
The figure behind the kidnapping appears to be Master Elephant, which confuses Po as he's been missing for several months. Right as he's about to land a finishing blow, the figure shape shifts into Master Chicken, throwing Po's attack and resulting in him getting a bad head injury. He does his best to pursue the attackers, but can't keep up. Dismayed, he returns to the Jade Palace...
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...And finds Zhen trying to steal something, using the commotion outside as a distraction. Po fights, but he's still badly injured and can't give it his all, resulting in Zhen being able to slip away with her prize—a dust bunny from under the furniture. Po is baffled.
(Side note: I would probably redesign Zhen so she actually looks like she matches the other characters' style, but I digress.)
Feeling dismayed, he returns to the noodle shop, where both his dads work on treating his wounds and comforting him. As Po explains what happened, Mr. Ping mentions that customers have been circulating rumors about a shapeshifting sorceress in Juniper City. Po decides that that's where he needs to go, promises his dads he'll be safe, and leaves.
(I'm cutting Mr. Ping and Li's subplot, because as much as I love them they don't really add much to the plot. It also feels like it goes against Mr. Ping's characterization in KFP 1 and 2 in particular.)
This is where we can have the scene of the Chameleon vs. the crime bosses. This can mostly stay the same except one of the bosses attempts to attack her when she shape shifts, causing her to retaliate with a magic-based attack. She also needs to straight-up kill the guy to establish her and her sorcery as a legit threat.
Po arrives at the Happy Bunny tavern to look for a ride to Juniper City. As he talks to Fish and Chip, he notices Zhen nearby doing some black market trading with Granny Boar to obtain a white feather. Po confronts her and she tries to run out with the feather, causing the boar family to pursue in a big fight scene.
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Po and Zhen manage to escape, Zhen stashing the feather. Po threatens to have her sent to jail, but Zhen confirms she's working for the Chameleon and can lead Po to her so he can rescue Shifu. Po dislikes this situation, but has no choice but to agree.
(Unlike in the actual film, I would make it so her lair is hidden in some fashion; magic that keeps it camouflaged would be appropriate for a chameleon, or it could be underground or hidden behind something. Regardless, it should be impossible to locate without Zhen's assistance.)
On the boat ride over to Juniper city, Zhen says that she has to "obtain" one more item from the local history museum or she'll be in big trouble with the Chameleon. Po doesn't like this detour, but once again has no choice in the matter.
Po asks why Zhen would want to work for someone so obviously evil, and this is the point where Zhen admits she was adopted by the Chameleon and we get her backstory.
(I would establish that the Chameleon has an actual name, but only Zhen uses it. It shows that Zhen is closer to her than most, not quite seeing her as a mother but not fearing her enough to use her preferred title. Also, the Chameleon's the only KFP villain without a proper name and that bothers me.)
The backstory can be the same, but the part about her living on the streets and meeting the Chameleon for the first time should be merged into a single flashback.
Zhen says that Po couldn't understand, but Po reveals that he's also adopted, and that he probably would commit some noodle-related crime if his dad asked him to. Still, Zhen insists that people don't change, and that includes her.
They arrive at Juniper city (Po is impressed at its size but he very much is not acting like he's never seen a city before). Zhen covers up her muzzle and tucks her tail under her clothes so she won't be recognized.
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Zhen is ready to break into the museum, but Po says that he's got this and goes up to the guards to tell them that he has some official Dragon Warrior business to take care of and will need to borrow some ancient artifacts.
Unlike in the actual film, everyone ready acknowledges him as the Dragon Warrior. The guards are more than happy to loan him whatever he needs... until Zhen's tail pops out and the guards recognize her, prompting them to attack.
During the scuffle, Zhen uses a chi blast to knock back one of the guards, but almost gets taken out by the other guard coming up behind her. Po defends her but gets mildly injured as a result.
After the fight, Po asks about the chi move and Zhen states that the Chameleon taught her the basics.
Zhen confirms that the Chameleon is a master of chi, and that the sorcery she uses is a specific type of chi manipulation.
(The reason I'm connecting chi to her powers is that it makes them feel a bit less out of left field, and helps 4 feel like a logical progression from 3.)
Zhen admits that she's not very good at using chi, but Po points out that it took him years to use chi in battle. He also compliments her on her kung fu, and she confirms she's self-taught.
(In this rewrite, Zhen is good at fighting but not quite at the level she is in the actual movie. This is to address the issue of who taught her if the Chameleon doesn't know kung fu.)
He takes a moment to give her a few pointers, which causes her to ask why he took that blow for her earlier, figuring there's a catch. Po just says it's the right thing to do, but Zhen is skeptical, figuring he only did it because he still needs her to lead him to Shifu.
The reminder of Shifu prompts Po to move on, and they grab the item Zhen was after, a 500 year old set of blades, then run for it.
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Po and Zhen arrive at the Chameleon's lair, and Zhen shows Po how to get inside and tells him where Shifu is being held. She says that she'll take the items to the Chameleon, which will distract her while Po breaks him out. Po thanks her, and the two separate. Zhen warns him of booby traps on the way out.
There are indeed booby traps, such as those saw contraptions from the actual movie and a bunch of guards. It takes Po a few minutes, but he eventually gets through them.
Po finds Shifu being held in a dark room. Shifu is glad to see him, but warns him to be careful as the Chameleon's likely not far away. Po explains Zhen's distraction and moves to free him... only for a cage to fall down and trap him as well.
"Shifu" is then revealed to be the Chameleon in disguise, who slips through the bars via shape shifting into a mantis and thanks Zhen for her help. Zhen apologizes to Po, who's naturally upset ("I mean, I know you were evil, but I didn't think you were THAT evil").
Zhen hands over the three items she collected, and it's confirmed what they are: a dust bunny that contains a clump of Tai Lung's fur, a feather from Lord Shen, and a pair of blades once wielded by Kai.
Po mistakenly interprets this as the Chameleon being a collector of kung fu memorabilia and tries to chat about the Jade Palace's collection, much to her bafflement.
The Chameleon explains that a trace of a person's chi remains long after their death, and demonstrates by doing The Tongue Thing on Kai's blade, stripping its chi, and immediately taking his form.
(As you may have picked up on, this rewrite removes the spirit world elements entirely. While they are really interesting, I think cutting them is the best option because:
1. There is so much plot involved with bringing Po's old enemies back that you could make that an entire movie in and of itself. It's hard to do it justice when you're cramming it in around the edges of this movie.
2. It makes the Chameleon too similar to Kai in terms of abilities.
3. Having her rely on stealing other's kung fu makes her come across as weak despite being a powerful sorceress.)
Po asks her if her goal is to take over China, but she says no; she just wants to end the practice of kung fu for good, and prove that sorcery is the superior option. To prove it, she has Shifu brought in.
While having your chi stripped does not remove one's kung fu abilities in this rewrite, it is still removing part of one's life energy and thus weakening them severely for a period of time—ergo, Shifu is still unable to fight at his best. Still, he manages to hold his own.
Instead of using kung fu, the Chameleon relies on the brute animalistic strength and inherent abilities of the forms she takes, switching whenever she's loosing to keep her opponents on her toes and even transforming into Shifu himself for a period. She also uses a few chi-based attacks.
Just when it looks like Shifu is about to win the fight, she uses her tongue to strip the chi from the fur clump, taking the form of Tai Lung. Shifu is so shocked and distraught that he fails to attack, allowing the Chameleon to land a serious blow.
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She returns to her original form and states that when the blood moon has risen, she will battle and take down every master in the middle of Juniper city, where everyone can learn just how useless kung fu and the people who teach it are. She leaves Po in his cage panicking over Shifu, who's unresponsive.
Zhen follows the Chameleon outside, where we get the "does the blood moon always rise so slowly" gag. Noticing that Zhen looks troubled, she asks what's wrong, and Zhen talks about how Po encouraged her to do the right thing. Even though she's been told that kung fu masters are elitist, selfish people, she couldn't see any of that in Po.
(Side note: I want to establish in this rewrite that while the Chameleon will claim up and down that Zhen is only a pawn for her to use, she does care about her to some extent, even though probably loathes the fact she does. For example, when talking to Zhen here, she might pick some rubble out of her fur or something to show there's a teeny tiny bit of actual affection hidden there.
The reason for this is that all other KFP villains have had an emotional anchor—Shifu for Tai Lung, Shen's parents for Shen, and Oogway for Kai. The Chameleon being abusive but having some real love for Zhen and Zhen struggling with her gaslighting adds a lot more depth to both of them.)
The Chameleon finally reveals her backstory, which should be told in a hyper-stylized way à la the flashbacks in KFP 2 and 3. Just like Zhen, she grew up on the streets as an orphan, broke and starving. She admired kung fu greatly and wanted to learn it, but everyone turned her away for having no money to pay for lessons.
One day, she found a shiny jade amulet on the streets that someone lost, finally giving her a much-needed break. She is able to use that money to enroll in classes.
The problem was that while the money changed her financial status, it didn't change the way people saw her. Her master still considered her a lowly gutter rat and treated her as such, verbally insulting her and beating her down during training sessions. It's very much like how Shifu treated Po in KFP 1, except worse, especially because the Chameleon is a small and fragile animal.
Finally, during one training session she became too injured to move. Her master told her to quit and started to walk away, only for her to grab his leg with her tongue to trip him up. However, at the peak of her self-loathing, she instead discovered her chi stealing abilities and transformed into him. It's not shown, but it is implied she killed him.
As the flashback ends, the Chameleon shifts into Zhen and tells her that no matter how much you change, you can't change the way other people see you. Siding with Po, she says, will only get her hurt. Zhen nods and unexpectedly hugs the Chameleon, telling her she knows, and runs off.
Cutting back to Po, we see him frantically trying to break the bars of his cage. Zhen comes forward and drops down on her hands and knees, apologizing for everything. Po says that she came back, and that's what matters.
She reveals that the "hug" was actually just a way for her to get the key off of the Chameleon, and she uses it to unlock Po's cage. Po runs over to Shifu and he and Zhen heal him with chi, and we get a callback to the "I'M NOT DYING YOU IDIOT" scene from KFP 1.
However, while Shifu's not dying, he is very badly injured and can barely walk on his own. Po asks how they can take on the Chameleon and her army with just three of them, but Zhen holds up the key and suggests they get an army of their own.
Running downstairs, Zhen reveals where the other masters are being held. To Po's shock, the Furious Five are among those captured. Tigress confirms that the summons they received were traps laid by the Chameleon, and she already has their forms.
Also down there are the other crime bosses, as it feels like they just disappear in the actual film after their scenes.
Zhen only manages to unlock the Five's cages before before the Chameleon snatches the key back with her tongue, revealing that she knew Zhen was lying to her. Behind her, her army assembles.
Tigress confirms that that the Five will take on the army, and Po faces off with the Chameleon one-on-one. She strips the feather and uses Shen's form to fly up and take the upper ground, trying to kick a cage onto him. Zhen helps deflect it, and the Chameleon tells her to stay out of the way. Po and her continue to battle.
Despite Po's best attempts at blocking it, she does finally stick him with her tongue. He grabs it and throws her a distance in her fragile base form, injuring her but still giving her some of his chi in the process.
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The Chameleon takes on Po's form next, and we get a fight similar to the one in the movie, though once again with her using less kung fu and more magic and physical attacks.
She mentions how she was rejected and tries to tell him that he should be on her side, because a bit fat panda like him must have been treated just as badly as she was. Po denies this, but Shifu admits it's pretty accurate. Po says he's not helping.
Po admits that she has a point, except she forgot one thing, and we get a callback to the "I'm THE big fat panda" moment from KFP 1.
The two attack at the same time. As the dust clears, it's revealed that neither are doing great—Po has gotten a lot of little injuries and the chi stealing has weakened him. The Chameleon is struggling to shapeshift at all, with the attempt causing her pain, and instead settles for trying to blast him. Zhen steps in and manages to redirect the attack back at her.
The Chameleon takes the blow and ends up back on the floor as a parallel to her flashback. Zhen reaffirms that she disagrees with her worldview—people can change, and she's going to prove it. If the Chameleon wants get to Po, she'll need to get through her first.
The Chameleon kind of laughs this off at first before realizing she's dead serious. She states that Zhen isn't even good at fighting, but Po disagrees, giving Zhen a confidence boost. The Chameleon struggles to her feet as if readying an attack, everyone braces themselves... and she surrenders, too injured to fight and unable to bring herself to hurt Zhen.
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(There are a few reasons why I think her surrendering makes for an interesting defeat here:
1. There's no spirit realm portal to yeet her into in this version;
2. There's only so many times Po's enemies can be yeeted directly into the spirit realm before it gets old;
3. It adds character depth, and;
4. It ties back nicely in to the theme of change and that it's never too late to do the right thing.)
Zhen helps the Chameleon up, Tigress does the same for Po, and Monkey does the same for Shifu. The five reveal that despite being exhausted, they still managed to wipe the floor with the Chameleon's army, which Zhen thinks is incredible. Po introduces Zhen to them formally, and Shifu asks if they can save the introductions for after they get medical treatment.
Later on, Po (carrying the staff Oogway gave him) approaches Zhen, who's sitting under the peach tree by the Jade Palace. He asks her if she's doing okay after everything that's happened. She says she's alright, but is pretty scared of what's going to happen next, given that the Chameleon's in jail and she has nowhere to go.
Po reveals that him and Shifu have been talking, and he plans to open a new school as part of the Jade Palace that will offer free kung fu lessons to anyone who's interested in learning. Zhen asks if there are any spots open, and we end similar to the actual movie, with her training alongside the five.
the credits still end with the Jack Black cover of Baby One More Time because it slaps
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himegureisu · 7 months
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Hiii! Just got home from a horrifying midterm exam. It went horrible, none of the questions were even in the lesson plan. Although it did give me an idea for this request :')
It's practically universal knowledge that Snape is a 'terror prof' (iykyk) at Hogwarts — his standards are high, he's very particular with essays and it's practically expected that every major exam, tears will be shed in and out the classroom with the amount of curveballs he throws at you.
(I'd feel like he'd be the type to have a True or False exam with choices like: True, Partially True, Partially False, False, and if none is applicable write the correct answer and all of it is situational)
He's married to the reader and they're both teachers, so they help each other on their loads. Much more efficient that way. One night after a particularly hard-hitting major exam in the semester, reader encounters tear stains and snot and a few drops of blood from a nosebleed on one of the exams (witnesses this once lol) and decided to confront him husband about it. Thank you! I hope this isn't too specific ;w;
Questions and Answers
Pairing: Severus Snape x Reader
A/N: I'm sorry you had a horrible exam day and thank you for preventing me from pulling my hair out of frustration because my Notion page was not cooperating when this request came through. I hope you enjoy this! 💖
——————————— 🪄———————————
“Severus, darling, why do your exam papers have at least two different types of fluids on them?” your fingers flip through the unfinished stack, your eyes scanning them.
This was the thirty-fifth test paper from his pile that you graded. His second-year tests were stained by a range of substances you curiously identified through a spell.
Did he truly not notice them?
“There’s a combination of either snot, sweat, tears, or,” you paused, taking one of the papers you already graded, to present to him. His dark eyes highlighted by the round reading glasses made for a rather attractive sight but focus, “On the rare occasion, blood,”
“Oh,” he simply said, looking up at you, “And?”
“Is that all you can say?” you frustratedly run a hand through your forehead as you sit on the edge of his desk causing him to stop, “What are these questions even? It’s a major exam for second years, not OWLs or NEWTs, Severus. My head hurts not only from the answers but also the questions,”
“If they can’t answer then they’re not competent enough to proceed to the…” his sentence undone by the beginning of your ramble, an attempt to explain why his methods were not feasible.
“Can you imagine the physical, mental, and emotional drain that major exams cause to students? You can reminisce on your time as one if it helps but it’s not good and then to be brought to this level of inquiry as if they were taking a mastery,” you explained, “There isn’t even a 50-50 chance to get the answer right only 25 because you decided that it would be better if there would be four very similar but distinct answers to the multiple choice questions and not a chance of redemption for those who don’t know the question if the said answer is one they needed to correct. I can better understand your students’ frustrations from this version of your exams,”
“To adjust the exam would mean that there would be a lower level of understanding…”
“That’s the point though since they’re just building the foundation of what they know for potions!” you exclaimed, “If it were a muggle game, Severus, it should be easy, medium, and then hard but your exams are hard, hard, and then hard on every level. Do you understand?”
“Yes, but…”
“Sev, imagine this,” you sit on his lap, cupping his cheeks for him to focus on you as you say, “Imagine a child, our child, a little boy or girl coming home to us in tears because of a similar test that they’d taken on that day,”
“It would be different. They would be ours,” he grumbled, pulling you in closer to bask in your warmth, “We wouldn’t teach them to be like that,”
“Sev, just imagine!” you sighed exasperatedly, his face buried beneath your chin, “Your little girl coming home in tears crying for us wanting a hug because of an awful exam day,”
His breathing was in sync with yours, trying to understand your reasoning. His imagination slowly conjures a little girl in your image. Her face was stained with big fat crocodile tears, a snot-filled nose, and books slung defeatedly on her arm. His heart tightened at the image of it, protectiveness surging from within.
No one was allowed to make either of you cry.
“Can you imagine?” you softly asked, running a hand through his hair, as he mumbled, “Yes,”
“Can you change the way your tests are written?” you silently prayed that he would, he breathed in and faced you to answer, “Fine, and you’ll help me,”
“I expect as much,” you smiled.
As you were about to get off his lap, his arms quickly pulled you back and in doing so, caused the chair to stumble a bit from the force. His nose on your hair, breaths warm, and hug unwilling to let go.
“Sev?” you glance back to see his darkened gaze, “What is it?
“Do you want children?” he asked, it wasn’t something both of you discussed in depth before, “I realized that after four years of marriage, we didn’t elaborate on our expectations on that particular topic,”
“If we’re blessed with children, then I’m happy,” you informed, tracing the contours of his face. No matter how many times you’ve seen him it’s like there’s another new thing to catalog in your mind, “If not, then I’ll be happy having you all to myself,”
“I don’t know if I want children,” he admitted, and you kissed his cheek, “We’ll get there when we get there, Sev, for now, don’t think about it,”
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pjoxreader · 1 year
Text
PJO Boys Helping With Reader's Period
Leo Valdez
-This man is a mechanical genius, he would make you anything and everything. Just say the word.
-So when he sees you hesitating about asking him for something he pokes and prods until you cave in, asking him to make you a heating pad.
-It takes a few seconds for the gears in his brain to turn before he gets it. “Ohhh! Yeah! Yeah! That’s no problem, I’m sure I can cook something up! Just give me a night!”
-There’s no way he wouldn’t drop everything if he knew your comfort was on the line. 
-He’d go around and ask the other girls in camp about the sort of things that helped them with cramps. 
-Sure enough the next morning he’d bring you a horribly wrapped gift with a sleepy grin, offering you the heating pad he made. It not only had different heat levels and wrapped around your entire body to help with lower back cramps, it also had multiple massaging functions.
-Please take a nap with him, after all that work he’d want nothing more. 
Frank Zhang
-He tries so hard to be helpful. He really tries. It isn’t his fault that all the women in his family were very strong and independent. 
-You once asked him to get you some pads. He ended up coming back with six different boxes and some tampons just in case.
-”...Frank…” you complain as he sets the all down on your bed, you could see his hesitance as he tries to figure out what he did wrong.
-”Did… Did I not get enough?” You can’t stay mad at him since he looked like a worried puppy. 
-He ends up working on some basic tasks instead like getting your craving for you. That? That he can do.
-He’ll bring you anything from Hot coco, to your favorite chocolate or sweet. And if it’s very specific he’ll go to Nico to ask if he could shadow travel for it. 
-He also keeps a little stash of some of your favorite snacks, just in case he isn’t able to get what you’re craving in time.
Percy Jackson
-Sally Jackson raised this man right. SHE RAISED HIM RIGHT.
-He carries around both tampons and pads, no questions asked for anyone who needs it.  Not only is he naturally charming, he's genuinely a sweet guy.
-You accidently bleed through onto his bed? No worries he can just wash it. It isn’t the first time he’s had to get blood out of something.
-He’ll give you massages to help with your cramps. It doesn’t matter how long it takes as long as it helps you feel better.
-He claims it’s a good workout so he doesn’t mind doing it. 
-Don’t expect to get anything yourself during your period. You need food? He’s on his way. Water? Already got it. 
-When it’s time to sleep he’ll hold you close and gently rub circles into your hip and side, whispering loving words of affirmation. He knows your emotions could get a bit wild during this time of the month. He’s the best boyfriend you could ask for.
Jason Grace
-He’s clueless. He was raised by wolves after all and the time he was with his family he was too young to be informed about… That.
-At least the look of utter horror on his face is amusing. He looks down there as if you’d start spurting blood, face utterly pale.
-”But… Won’t you like… Bleed out or something?” he asks in utter concern.
-You have to try so hard to not laugh at him. Please set him down and borrow one of the Apollo kids books on the subject.
-He will 100% be staring in utter horror as if you’re explaining to him how to commit murder but he’s at least listening.
-He has a new respect for women now and to be honest he’ll be a bit scared of them for a while.
-He’ll go to the other girls of Argo ll to make sure that you weren’t just messing with him.
~Masterlist & Rules~
Like my writing? Please consider sending me a Ko-fi! ☕
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nolita-fairytale · 1 year
Text
burn your life down | chef luca x fem!reader | chapter eleven
summary: you receive bad news, but luca is there for you. and it seems like he's intent on continuing to be there for you.
warnings: angst, grief, death, vomiting, fluff, conversations about divorce, second person pov, swearing, danish inaccuracies, very little connection to the storyline of the bear.
word count: 3.3k
listen to: the official 'burn your life down' playlist (specifically 'how to mend a broken heart' - al green & 'love' - kendrick lamar; another very will poulter-coded choice)
a/n: pov: it's me warning you that there is in fact angst but trust, babes. trust. after the trauma of meeting donna b in season 2, i wanted to explore characters who had positive relationships with their mothers. so if you have not picked up on it yet, this story is also about mothers **cries because it's too damn sweet. let me know if you'd like to be added or removed from the taglist.
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part ten | masterlist | part twelve
Astrid: Hey give me a call when you’re up. 
I don’t want to worry you, but we need to talk. 
Your fingers hurriedly move to open up the multiple missed notifications that you have from her, holding the phone up to your ear so that you can listen to her voicemail next. 
“Hey… I know you’re probably still asleep right now,” you hear, her voice somber, as you listen to Astrid’s voicemail, left for you at three in the morning. “And I know that you’ve got your do not disturb on. But I really need to talk. Call me when you’re up.” 
Your heart pounds in your chest as your mind races with fears over what this could be about, and as your eyes scroll through the other missed notifications, you see something that stops you in your tracks: 
1 Missed Call from Joe
And it all suddenly feels real, a sense of dread fills your throat, and you can only imagine that it must be an emergency if both Astrid and Joe have called. Your mind races. It can’t be about Joe – if he called too, right?
The severity of the situation forces you to sit up straight as you steal a glance Luca’s way. You’re grateful that he’s such a heavy sleeper as you peel the covers back, tiptoeing out into the living room so that you don’t wake Luca. Your fingers shake as they hover over Astrid’s name, before tapping down on the screen so that you can give her a call back. 
It only rings twice before Astrid answers, a tiredness in the way her voice sounds, as if she hasn’t slept all night. 
“Hey, Astrid. What’s going on?” you ask, a panic that colors your voice as you wait for her reply. 
The anticipation builds in every moment of silence she leaves between the two of you. 
“It’s mum. Ehm…” she trails off, her voice breaking. 
No. 
It’s as if your worst nightmare is coming true – like no matter how many times you’ve rehearsed this scenario in your head, prepared for it, braced for it, nothing softens the blow of the words that Astrid utters. 
“She’s gone. She passed. Early this morning,” Astrid finally says, a sob following. “We’re still at the hospital right now.” 
As Astrid begins to cry, you let her, even though you feel like you can’t breathe. Through her tears, she tries her best to explain what happened and you can feel yourself going numb as you listen. You can barely process what she’s saying as the words wash over you, a deep pain building in your belly with each detail she shares: that mum hadn’t been feeling well late last night, that she had a fever of 104 F and that’s when they knew she had to be taken to the hospital, that she passed a few hours later. 
It was sudden. 
It was quick. 
And now, Astrid’s whole world – your whole world, and Joe’s – has changed forever.
All you can do is attempt to breathe, to listen, and try your best not to drop your phone as your hands tremble.
You can feel it, a sickening feeling that wells up from your belly and into your throat as you croak out:
“Astrid, I’m so sorry.”
“After everything we’ve been through, all the rounds of chemo… I just can’t believe that overnight she’s gone,” Astrid whispers, tears falling down her cheeks. “I just-, I thought we’d have more time.”
“I know. Me too,” you agree quietly. 
It doesn’t feel real, and you wonder if you’re just in denial. 
“I’m so sorry to call like this. But I thought you should know,” Astrid apologizes, clearing her throat as she continues. “‘M sure I ruined your high from the all-night shag-fest with the hot pastry chef, now didn’t I?”
You chuckle, in response to her attempt to lighten the mood. 
“No, it’s okay. I’m glad you called,” you reassure her, your voice soft. 
“I’ve got to go. Joe and I are going to try to grab something to eat and ehm, try to get a hold of Lina. I’ll keep you posted on everything. On all the details, you know… about… anything we do,” Astrid informs you, trying her best to pull herself together.  
“But I just wanted you to know and ehm, well, I know Joe called.”
“No, I-. Yeah,” you stammer through, at a loss for words. “I… I’ll give him a call. And thank you… for calling me. Thank you for telling me.”
Astrid nods solemnly, “She loved you like one of us.”
You swallow, as a stream of tears streak your cheeks 
“Yeah I… I love – loved – her too.” 
You clear your throat, unaware that your hands have begun to shake. 
“And please keep me posted. I’d like to be there… at the funeral. If you think it’s appropriate.”
“‘Course,” Astrid agrees. “I love you. Call you later?”
“Please. And… yes,” you say, adding if it’s a promise:
“I love you too.”
As soon as you hang up the phone, it’s as if your body knows something you don’t – like your brain hasn’t quite processed the news, racing your body to intellectualize everything you’ve just heard, so your body has to take over instead. Your stomach flips, and suddenly, you’re overwhelmed with the urge to vomit. You sprint to your small apartment bathroom, throwing the toilet seat up with a clang as you begin to empty the contents of your stomach into the toilet, in an uncontrollable physical response.
The sound of you retching, coughing up the last of it, seems to wake up Luca. You brace yourself against the toilet, flushing it as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. Your body feels fragile and your mind races as you reach behind you for the towel that lays folded over your towel bar, clutching it towards you. 
“My love, is everything alright?” you hear his voice, as Luca stirs, sitting up in bed. 
The sound of his footsteps heading towards you fill your ears, and as they get closer and closer to you, Luca appears in the doorway, his eyes squinting from how jarring of a wakeup he’s just had. You look up at him, noticing the way his face has twisted itself into a look of concern, swallowing as you rack your brain, searching for a way to explain what just happened. 
“Well, the good news is that I’m not pregnant,” is all that comes out, in sheer disbelief that you’ve chosen to make a joke at this moment. Luca only looks more concerned, more worried, more confused, so you shake your head this time, muttering an apology under your breath. “Uh… remember when I told you… my ex’s mom… she got really sick and we had to move to the UK because of it?”
“Yeah,” he answers, unsure of what this has to do with why you’re stuck to the bathroom floor. 
“I-. Astrid, his sister, just called. She uh…” you trail off, because it feels like you can’t get the words out of your mouth – like if you say it out loud, it’d make it all the more real. 
Your voice, this time much somber, croaks out the words, and you feel sick to your stomach again.
“She passed… last night,” you finally say again, a wave of nausea coming over you. 
“Oh, my love,” Luca sighs empathetically, as his heart falls at the news. “I’m so sorry.”
But before he can say anything else, you’re folded over the toilet once more, caught up in a competition with your own body of which could be worse: dry heaving or vomiting. Instead of leaving, Luca takes a few steps towards you, sitting down next to you as he rubs soothing patterns across your back, as you work this out. What feels like forever, and simultaneously, barely a few seconds, your back is pressed against the wall as you try your best to get your heart rate back down. 
The cold floor and the rigid wall that you’ve pressed your back against feels grounding, perhaps the only thing tethering you to this world. Luca sits with you quietly, but his presence can be felt in tonnes. It’s strong, steady, comforting, with care and love in every single touch and touch he sends your way. 
After a few minutes of letting you stare at the wall blankly, Luca gets up, kneeling on his knees as he offers his hands to you. 
“C’mon. Let’s get you some water and back into bed,” Luca suggests. “I’ll call Jesper and Mathilde. Let them know you’re not going in today.”
You nod, sliding both of your hands into his as he helps to your feet. 
-------------------------------
“How are you doing, babe?” Luca asks you, as you wake up from your nap. 
You’re grateful that he called in today, after the news, and called in for you as well. After your phone call with Astrid, not to mention hurling the entire contents of your stomach (and then some) into the toilet this morning, you’d crawled back into bed and fallen asleep. It hadn’t been great sleep – more so an avoidance mechanism than anything else, you realize – as you begin to come to. 
“Jesper was just here. Came by to drop off food,” Luca adds, as you move onto your side so that you can face him. “They’re worried about you.”
“I’m not hungry,” is all you manage to say. 
He nods, “For later maybe.” 
He pauses, before repeating his question from earlier. 
“How are you doing? What can I do?
You think it over, only slightly upset with yourself for being annoyed at his question. Of course he’s only trying to be helpful, only trying to care for you through this horrible thing. But it’s not like there’s anything he can do to take your pain away either, which, it’s silly you know, is what bothers you so much about his ask. 
But as you look over at the man who wants nothing more than to love you, and you know he’s only trying to be helpful in an unwinnable situation.
You muster up your best smile, because you want to reassure him that you’re sort of-kind-of-okay, and you’d rather try than be a jerk right now. 
“Come back to bed?” you ask him, your voice lifting at the end of the question. “I think I just want you to hold me.”
“Sounds like something that could be arranged,” Luca replies with a smile on his face, in an attempt to lighten up the mood a little. 
As you lay on your side, Luca curls up behind you, engulfing you in his arms as he presses a kiss to the back of your shoulder, tangling his legs with yours underneath the covers. And you’re right. It does make you feel better – being held by him – and you’re glad that you chose not to push him away. 
After a few beats, and a thick silence between the two of you, Luca finally speaks again.
“Do you want to tell me about her?”
Do you?
You debate with yourself whether or not you want to, because on one hand you feel weird about it – asking Luca to listen to you talk about how much you loved your ex husband’s mother – and on the other, you’re afraid. 
Afraid it’ll hurt too much. 
Afraid it may break you open. 
Eventually, the part of you that leans towards saying ‘yes’ wins, as you answer with:
“Yeah. I think that might be helpful.” 
Luca nods behind you, before nuzzling his nose into the space between your neck and your shoulders. He leaves soft kisses against your skin that have no intention of being anything but a comforting gesture. 
“Astrid said something on the phone earlier. That she loved me like one of them,” you start, your voice caught in your throat as you say it. 
“And she did. She embraced me as her own… like…” you trail off, chuckling as you recall your favorite memories of Aiko Kimura. 
“She was beyond upset to learn that I didn’t grow up pleating dumplings around the table when I was a kid, which was… I think maybe the first thing we ever cooked together. She pulled out all the stops. Made a huge thing of it and made Joe, Astrid, and Lina join us so that I could get the real family experience.”
“And every time after that… she always wanted to teach me something new, something I could learn, carry with me,” you continue, the memories so fond and the feeling so bittersweet. 
“She was all about… slowing down, using the senses, no-recipe kind of stuff. I think it’s where I got so much of my heart from. In my food.”
You’re really not sure how you’re keeping it together, but, you decide, you might as well lean into the sweetness for now. 
“I should do a dish. For her. At the restaurant,” you declare, coming to the conclusion as the words leave your lips. 
“I think that’s a great idea,” Luca agrees, leaving another soft kiss along your shoulder. 
“To honor her. You know?” you add. 
Luca only hums in response, his arms wrapped around your frame holding you tighter against his chest. 
You wait a beat. 
Then another, your thoughts, moving a mile a minute from being plunged into grief from this devastating loss. 
“I’m nervous – about going to London,” you confess, softly. You like to ask, usually, if it’s okay – if Luca wants to hear about these kinds of things – but it feels virtually unavoidable. 
“I haven’t been back since Joe and I divorced… since I moved here. But I think I should. For the funeral.”
“Do you think it’ll be soon?” Luca asks, as you turn your head to look at him, checking that this is a conversation he’s willing to have. 
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “I’m waiting for Astrid to tell me. But Lina’s, their youngest sister, has been studying abroad – Singapore – so… I don’t know.”
“I’m just nervous… about it all, I guess. A lot’s changed. I’ve… changed.”
At this point you’re just thinking out loud, no longer able to contain the stream of consciousness that flows from with an ease that makes you anxious. 
Of course, you’ve changed. You have a new life here. You’re a you that you’ve never been before, having shed the layers of your past self like a snake shedding its skin. The realization is striking, while your ambivalence to return to your previous home in your new form feels more and more significant. 
It’s Luca’s turn to be quiet as he thinks over whether or not the idea in his head is appropriate to suggest, figuring, the worst thing you can do is say ‘no.’ 
“I could go with you,” he offers, quiet, yet sure. 
Oh. 
“But if you don’t feel like it would be right… under the circumstances…” Luca continues, in fear of making things more complicated for you. 
“No I-. What do you-, like… in what capacity?” you interject, hesitant about the question that you’re bringing up. 
You’re not sure why it’s taken this long for either of you to articulate it, especially since you’ve already called him your boyfriend to your friends, to your mom, but the naming, the voicing of the sacred label is still something you haven’t done. 
You don’t want to overcomplicate things, considering it already feels complicated, so what you’re really asking him is:
How would I introduce you?
“I was thinking… as your boyfriend,” Luca answers, slowly. “But if you think it’s too much – introducing me during this-.” 
“No, I. Yes! I want to,” you’re quick to reply, reassuring him that you’re still all in, even in the midst of this loss – especially in the midst of this loss. You wiggle your body so that you’re now facing him, your chests pressed together, and you wonder if he can feel yours pounding away. 
“Yes. I want you to come. I… I want to introduce you to them… to everyone, as my boyfriend.”
Seemingly satisfied with the answer, Luca leans in to press a short kiss to your lips before nodding in agreement: “Okay.”
You wait a beat, almost as if you think he’ll take it back, considering the circumstances. Only, he doesn’t, so you have to ask. 
“You would really do that?”
“Yeah,” he replies, simply. 
“I mean.. It’s just going to be a lot. It’s… a fucking funeral,” you continue to list, giving him every ‘out’ that you can possibly think of. “And you’d have to meet Joe. Which I can only imagine will be incredibly uncomfortable considering the circumstances and I’m not even sure what to expect because Joe and I have barely talked in months and I-.” 
You know you’re rambling, but you can’t help yourself. 
“Luca, I don’t know if I can ask you to do that.”
“You don’t have to, my love. I offered,” he says, as one of his hands cradles your head, his eyes on yours. 
“Plus, I don’t have to be with you the whole time. I know it’s going to be a tough trip for a lot of reasons. I could give you some space while we’re there too, so you don’t feel you have to entertain me. I’ll go see my mum, catch up with a friend….”
His reassurance seems to quell your nerves and you’re no longer panicking (as much) about introducing your people to your new boyfriend while grieving the loss of their matriarch. But you want him there. You so want him there. You want his support, and when he’s so willingly offering it to you, volunteering to enter the lion’s den with you, how can you say ‘no?’
“Why are you so good to me?” is all that comes out of your mouth. 
“Because I-,” Luca begins, pausing as he carefully chooses his next few words. You watch as he debates with himself, his decision clear when he opens his mouth again to say:
“Because you deserve it, babe.”
It’s then and there that you wonder what he was going to say before, half expecting him to say, ‘because I love you.’ 
But he doesn’t, and in some ways, you’re glad that whatever internal decision he made, that it wasn’t that. It’s not that you don’t want him to, because you’ve been feeling it too. It’s in every pause before you hang up the phone with him. It’s in the moments that you say your goodbyes for the morning or the evening that you watch the impulse, though fleeting, flash through his eyes. It’s in the way that you feel it so deeply in your bones that it makes you ache in the best kinds of ways. 
 You don’t want your first ‘I love you’ to be tainted with the grief and sadness surrounding this moment, but it’s been on your mind ever since your trip to Skagen. You think maybe you dreamed it, hearing him call you the love of his life, but whether or not it was real, those three words have hung heavily between the two of you ever since. 
“Thank you,” is all you say, before you repeat it again. 
“Thank you.”
-------------------------------
Everything feels off. You can’t cry. 
And you’ve tried. 
But ever since Luca left to run an errand, to run to the store, you’ve felt off-kilter. 
Perhaps it’s because you’ve had him to distract you this whole time. 
Perhaps it’s because you’re trying to be strong for everyone: for Astrid, for Lina, who you’ve been texting with all day – trying to coordinate a time to FaceTime – for yourself. 
Perhaps it’s because you haven’t called Joe yet. 
But, you’ve decided, you really need to cry. 
You pick up the phone, knowing exactly what you need to do, knowing exactly who you can let yourself completely fall apart with. 
The phone rings a few times before the person on the other line picks up, and as soon as you hear the silence on the other line, waiting for you to speak first since you called first. 
“Mom?”
And she can hear it in your voice as it breaks, concern and worry filling her every word and she asks: 
“Oh sweetie. What happened?”
And finally, you can let go.
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Regarding Stolas and Stella. It says something that both their VAs were thinking there was something more to their relationship than the actual showrunner.
Fans wanna throw up this excuse that “their headcanons weren’t true.” But what about the actual input from the actors? Do they not get a say in their own characters?
Also I have to be honest, this whole arranged marriage has been completely pointless as a ‘plotline’ because Stella is just a nothing character and Andreaphuls is going to be the big bad.
You can write Stella out of the show and nothing changes, hell in hindsight she wasn’t even needed for S1. You can have her just be dead and things can play out the same. Striker could still be involved, just don’t show who hired him, but it’s revealed later that it’s Andre.
Yea definitely I find it very notable that her VA thought we'd see more of her side of things and then... nope. So many people thought there would be more to her, and that doesn't translate to thinking she'd be a good person like the "stop crying about your HC" people insist, but rather, we simply thought she'd be, A PERSON AT ALL. She was set up to be genuinely upset over being cheated on, like so many of her S1 scenes are her screaming with rage and throwing things and panting over it. We also had this plotline that once the Stella/Stolas marriage had been happier. These people insisting Stella was always just evil seem to forget the S1 era of this show and how its subtlety was so good. How it was able to tell us a lot without insane biased BLITZO KYS party type writing. Remember this dialogue? (Sidenote, God seeing this makes me remember why I used to like Stolas and this show a lot less critically its such a shame it used to be so good).
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There was a lot of intrigue and mystery as to how things occurred in regards to their marriage at this point in time but we knew Octavia, granted she was a young child in the early marriage but still, she saw the home environment as having changed. I think her missing signs as a child because she was little could explain some of it... but clearly there was more to everything than that alone. And she blamed STOLAS specifically for it from what we saw. She says to him you ruined it, aka the cheating was the instigating event. Stolas' "I thought love would be fun" in the song of this episode and his failed explanations to Octavia suggested multiple possibilities. Back then a lot of people suspected Stolas was gay and now in 2024 we know its true, so the scenarios that seemed to be at play were either:
A) Neither of them loved each other but pretended to for Octavia's sake and maybe other reasons, but then Stolas broke that arrangement by sleeping with Blitz which angered Stella for reasons outside of love ie reputation.
B) Stella genuinely loved Stolas while he never did her, he tried to make it work but just couldn't, leading to Stella being furious over being arranged married to a guy, falling in love with him, only to find out he never loved her and no longer wanted to pretend.
Both of these are really interesting and this all felt so much different than S2 imo. We didn't need to be spoon fed a side to pick. Getting to have seen which of those scenarios it was and Stella's perspective would have been so good. At this point in time they were both victims and in turn the arranged marriage had made Octavia one too as she was stuck caught between them and their drama. It felt nuanced, realistic, interesting and cool. Stolas was still allowed to fuck up back then (just like Stella). It was painted as understandable but still a fuck up. Now, hes just a victim, victim, victim, and to write him as one, they took this interesting thing and twisted it into something else.
They made Stella some evil animal torturing bitch from birth that seemingly was completely unaffected by being raised and forced into an arranged marriage and that decided to devote her sole existence to stick around Stolas to torment him in various over the top and cruel ways (what is with this show and making people throw hate parties). Instead of being ANGRY, like she was in S1, panting with rage and clearly stressed, shes gleefully happy when it comes to her urge to hurt Stolas and at the idea of hurting him? How in the fuck is writing Stella to be like that instead of just focusing on how she felt about the marriage and how it affected her not outlandishly unrealistic and weird and stupid? Being forced into an arranged marriage and then the guy not loving you and cheating on you would hurt and affect anyone. Yet she seems so unaffected. Shes not allowed to actually feel anything other than hate for Stolas, she can feel no grief for herself, love for her daughter, sorrow at having to move out of her home for the past 18 or so years, nothing. Shes just a device to beat on Stolas so we feel sorry for him and she has no goals or thoughts outside of it.
Even fucking VALENTINO in Hazbin was shown to have more depth than this in that he was allowed to be shown to be upset at Angel changing where he lived. Yes it was shown as unhinged abuser's upset, but he shown as being bothered and hurt by Angel not wanting to be around him. I repeat: Rapist pimp Valentino who has convinced several people into abusive sexually exploitative soul contracts was allowed to be shown to be hurt and to long for someone more than Stella was.
Stella is so much so a device instead of a person that they had to shove in a brother character and divorce settlement plotline to overturn the assassination plotline (since that too has fulfilled its purpose as Stolitz drama now). All of this nobody saw coming because all of it was barely set up to the point Stella is still actively working against this new plotline once it comes in and is told by her brother she's a stupid cow and to stop doing what shes doing. And so she does. Instead of getting to drive her own story and goal and what she wants, instead of perhaps being written to change her mind herself, to choose to focus on something else even temporarily, nope, just have a man command her what to do (while still giving her no sympathy over being merely a puppet either of course). Now its time for the bullshit Andrealphus plotline so Stella can be replaced by the gay male character who gets to be a relevant plot driving antagonist instead. Its pathetic writing.
This show constantly does this. It sets things up, people get invested, then it gives them the middle finger and tells them they're stupid idiots for seeing what was actively shown and trusting the writing and it focuses on something else its now decided instead. Striker being bigoted straight and a joke is another example. The fact he appeared in Blitz's dream sequence, flirted with him while proposing blitz follow an alternate path in life in which they work together - nope you saw none of that he's just a dumb joke and you're dumb for seeing things and expecting consistency!
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AITA for not wanting to be in my cousin's life? This will be long, I'm sorry
I (f19, but this started at 15) have a rough relationship with my family, I don't have a better word to describe them as besides just not the best towards me. But the real issue now is that I don't want to be involved in my cousin's (f8, but this started at 5) life. This sounds very silly, I know, but let me explain. My cousin is physical in how she expresses herself towards me (she likes to throw things at me and hit me and bite me, and I can't do anything about it because I get in trouble if I do). I have a severe nut allergy and there have been multiple times she's been caught trying to smear peanut butter on me or in my mouth while I slept. She likes to tell me she wishes I'd just eat the peanut butter so she'd never have to see me again. She just hates me, honestly (I'm not sure why, I've never hated the kid, I'm not mean to her, none of us have been able to figure out why and when asked she just says she hates me because she hates me)
The house we lived in contained just me, her, my mother, and my uncle. She is not abused by either adult, before anyone asks, she's actually quite spoiled due to the fact that they can't discipline her in any way without risking her being taken away. And I don't hate her at all, I'm bitter about how she treats me, but I know she's only a little kid. However, I just don't like being treated that way. I recently moved out and I told my mother that I didn't want to be part of my cousin's life until she stopped treating me that way. (Info: My mother thinks she treats me this way because she's a kid so she can't vent her anger out on the adults and I was the only other kid she could vent it out on.) My mother thinks I'm being cruel and punishing my cousin, she says I'll regret this choice and that my cousin will be all I have one day so I shouldn't do this. I've tried to explain that I'm not doing it to punish my cousin, it's just not good for my mental health and I can't be around this behaviour anymore. Other family members and family friends have agreed with my mother, but my friends think my decision is right. Since moving out and not going through that every day, I've started to feel better about myself, my depression isn't as bad and I don't have as much anxiety when I go to sleep. That is kinda swaying my decision to me thinking I'm right for choosing this for myself, but I still worry my mother might be right and I might be ruining my cousin's mental health by leaving.
I want to add that I know I'm way older than her, and some of you might be wondering why I don't stand up to her, but I could never do anything to stop her. I spent many years in foster care due to issues with my family (my mother, specifically), and I know that even the littlest thing where I live can get your kid taken from you. If I even raised my voice at her to tell her to stop and she told someone, she could be taken away from my family and I can't do that to her, I know the horrors of foster care. I also have spent most of my life being abused and don't know how to protect myself or defend myself in situations like these. Please keep this in mind when/if you call me pathetic or stupid, trust me I know I am.
Please, I know a lot of you may think this is silly or dumb or bait, but I need to know aita for not wanting to be in my cousin's life?
Reasons I think I might be NTA: I think my decision is good for both of us and I believe I should put mental health first in this case as it can be dangerous in the future if I don't. I don't want to stay longer and end up hating her, she's just a kid and doesn't deserve to be hated.
Reasons I think I might be TA: This could be seen as punishing her, and she might hate me more for it. She's already started being meaner to other kids now that she can't vent it out on me and I'm an adult so I can take it better than one of her classmates could. She might think her behaviour drove me away and blame herself.
What are these acronyms?
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ratguy-nico · 5 months
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Okey so I saws the last episode of Dunmeshi and I need to talk about the shapeshifters.
I think is pretty obvious which belong to wich, meaning who on the team remembered each one that specific way... if you watched you got me
Im not gonna explain every single one but the last shapeshifters the closest to the real ones.
STARTO
MARCILLE!!!
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This one belong 100% to Laios and is awesome, Laios can not remeber the little details about his friens, like Chilichuck scarf or Senshi's helmet so he doesn't remeber Marcille's hair multiple hairstyle so he just get her hair free BUT surprinsingly he does remeber the detail in her spellbook CAUSE HE'S BEEN STUDYING IT that is such a detail and I love it.
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But I love more the implication that Laios think highley of the love Marcille feels for Falin, believing at heart that Marcille would do anything to save his sister. This man doesnt know what lesbians are but he certainly not what love is
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CHILCHUCK!!!
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Okey I'll be honest i have my doubts with this one, but for the sake of the ship let's say this was Senshi XD I'm kidding, this man belong to Senshi.
What is my doubt? Since Senshi and Marcille are from long-lived races they both infantilize Chilchuck and Laios, BUT this copy is not the baby face one, meaning is not the most infantileze one, But most important the tools of this copy were mostly right.
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Marcille doesn't give a shit about Chichuck's tools, she doesn't need to or want to but in guess who in fricking EPISODE 2 (so soon in the anime and already a ship) have a whole arc where he observes Chilchuck works up close, developing a deep respect for what Chilchuck does getting familiar with said tools
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Implications: Senshi watch this man up close, giving him more attention than any other member of the party, he is the one he rely on the most, but he's predjuice are strong and he cannot help thinking of him as a cute little child SICK and not in a good way thats you future husband >:0
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y por ultimo pero no menos importante
SENSHI!!!!
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GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY ejem this is from Chilchuck and I live for it
What can I say that you dont already know?
not-Senshi being the handsome one
Chilchuck inmediatly noticing the lack of the helmet detail in the Laios copy
the fact that when confronted with the fact that not-Senshi is more handsome than the real one (which rude, Marcille we can not all be lesbians like you >:0) he's just like "No, Senshi has always been handsome" re ofendido XD
y OJITO Laios said cool, Chilchuck just said Senshi has always been like that LIKE WHAT? HANDSOME? YEAH WE KNOW!
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(though this was also a very gay moment for Laios)
LOOK HOW IS THE REAL CHILCHUCK WHO'S MORE RILED UP BY HANDSOME SENSHI
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and the gratuitous beef to my man wtf what do you mean dumb looking one? XD no puedo es demasiado XD
This episode was too much fun the whole characters interaction just got me.
The memes the gifs LAIOS BARKING DOG LAIOS IS REAL
and ... the way I developed an instant crush on Itsuzumi here:
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NOTE I don't actually have a crush on Izutsumi, I know her from the manga and she is pretty much a cat, which cute, but ... not my type lets just say that.
But in this shot they are just my tipe of guy, haven't been touch for a single ray of sun on their, have never eat a proper meal, doesn't even register the concept and doesn't know what you mean by wash hair? what is that some kinda of joke?
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daytaker · 9 months
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Sins, Virtues, and Motivations: A Critical Analysis of Characters in Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
In this essay, I will argue that each demon brother some of the demon brothers can be associated with a sin (no duh), a virtue, and a core motivation--and that this motivation is best pursued through a synthesis of that sin and that virtue. Hegel would be very proud. Yes, this is critical media analysis. No, I will not try to explain the twisted, broken path that led me to this point in my life.
I will be looking at Lucifer, Mammon, and Levi in this study. Their core sins are obvious - Pride, Greed, and Envy. Their accompanying Virtues and Motivations are listed below.
I used the Seven Heavenly Virtues for this little game. These are Prudence, Justice, Fortitude, Temperance, Faith, Hope, and Charity.
They should not be confused with the Seven Capital Virtues, which are inversions of the Seven Deadly Sins. These are Humility, Charity, Kindness, Patience, Chastity, Temperance, and Diligence. I tried these first and damn were none of them easy to match up. Tell me, fandom for this mobile game designed for players to lust over hot demon men, which brother should have the "chastity" virtue?
Lucifer
Core Sin: Pride. Core Virtue: Fortitude. Core Motivation: To protect his family.
Lucifer's core motivation is to protect his brothers. He looks at this as a sort of penance for the outcome of the Great Celestial War. He knows that he's the reason they rebelled, and he feels responsible for their wellbeing. He is able to endure the relentless pressure of the responsibilities he puts on himself thanks to his core virtue, fortitude.
Fortitude is strongly associated with courage. Specifically, it is courage in the face of pain and adversity. We see him displaying this trait any time those he cares for are in jeopardy, and it often helps him make difficult decisions where neither outcome is ideal. Lucifer is decisive, canny, and accepts the consequences of his choices, good or bad.
His driving motivation is also bolstered by his core sin: pride. He views himself as ultra-competent, while his brothers consistently make mistakes; beyond that, it's only natural that he take responsibility for the choices of his brothers (like the choice to join him in rebelling) because he is so significant an influence as to virtually rob them of their autonomy.
This has led to Lucifer having a somewhat toxic relationship with his brothers. Lucifer often acts as a parental figure rather than a peer, while the rest of them are all in arrested development of some sort, often acting more like kids than the adults they insist they are.
Lucifer either doesn't recognize that by doing everything for the family on his own, he's stemming their ability to grow and learn, or he does know the consequences of what he's doing and he feels conflicted about it. He ultimately blames himself for the fact that they're all in the Devildom in the first place, living as avatars of sins to the extent that they struggle to function as independent adults.
So, while fortitude and pride allow Lucifer to simulate the act of protecting his family, it's a matter of perspective whether controlling every element of their lives is protection or harmful coddling.
Mammon
Core Sin: Greed. Core Virtue: Charity. Core Motivation: To be valued and valuable.
Mammon is simultaneously a vessel of greed and its inverse, charity. This is because his core motivation is twofold, and those are the rewards of greed and charity; to be valued - to fulfill a want, to be desired, to look flippin' cool - and to be valuable - to fulfill a need, to have inherent worth, to serve a purpose.
Setting aside his unhealthy relationship with money, let's examine how Mammon behaves and what his deeper interpersonal motivations tend to be. He clearly places a high value on his brothers and MC, and he has shown on multiple occasions that he is willing to put himself at risk to help or protect them. Early on in both the original game and in NightBringer, Mammon attempts to heroically rescue MC (and his younger brothers, in NightBringer). In both cases, though, Lucifer shows up and does it for him. Mammon's pursuit of his core motivation clashes with Lucifer's quest for his, and Lucifer is strong enough to simply take it from him. Although in NightBringer he and his brothers do earn the not-insubstantial reward of the title "Lords of the Underworld" after Lucifer's rescue, he appeared so dejected by Lucifer's oneupmanship that he spent a good portion of the next day sulking. In the original game, Mammon wants MC to promise that they won't be saved by anyone else besides him in the future. It appears that his greed for an improved status in his interpersonal relationships is left unfulfilled.
Mammon wants to be heroic - to be valuable - and he wants to be admired for it - to be valued. The cognitive dissonance that accompanies motivations like these is all that sustains a person with such a diminished sense of self-worth.
Speaking of a diminished sense of self worth...
Leviathan
Core Sin: Envy. Core Virtue: Hope. Core Motivation: To find joy in the things that give him joy.
Confusing motivation? Yes it is. But envy is a confusing sin. All the other sins--pride, greed, wrath, lust, gluttony, and sloth--are enjoyable to indulge on some level. Losing your temper when you feel you've been wronged, or eating a bunch of delicious food, or sleeping through the snooze alarm: We know why we do those things. We might regret them later, but we indulge them in the moment because of the enjoyable side.
There is nothing enjoyable about envy. Wanting something that isn't yours, that belongs to someone else, be it tangible goods, talents, a partner, a job... is nauseating. And it makes you feel like a bad person, and it drains the joy out of things that you used to love. Speaking from personal experience for a second, when I was a teenager, I played music in a company with a much younger musician who was incredibly talented, and I was deeply envious of her. I wanted her talent; I wanted the praise she received; I wanted to impress people; I wanted what she had. But there was nothing I could do. I hated feeling that way, but I couldn't shake it. And it ate away at my desire to play music. It took the joy out of something that once gave me joy.
You see the connection?
Levi struggles to find pleasure in anything he does, despite how many interests he has, because, in spite of his blustering dismissal of all things "normie", he is deeply envious of those he perceives as his social superiors. Now, I am not in any way saying that Levi is or would be an inc3l, but there's an element of his character that has a strong parallel to inc3l culture. The idea that there is something fundamentally wrong with him that prevents him from achieving what he wants socially and that the only way he can protect himself from those who would ridicule him is with a defensive contempt for the group that rejects him... Does any of that sound familiar?
But Levi is not an inc3l. No, not because you're willing to **** him and his two *****, though I'm sure that helps. It's because he has his core virtue: hope.
Have you ever heard of the black pill? It's kind of like the final stage of inc3l culture, where you accept that you're not an alpha male, you'll never be one, you'll never be accepted by a woman, you're ugly and unloveable, and you might as well just stop existing. It is sheer despair.
Levi maintains hope for the future, even if he prefers not to admit it out of fear of jinxing himself. He is able to form a deep bond with MC, who he views as a "normie", without renouncing his hobbies or being mocked for them. In fact, I would argue that the anxiety Levi sometimes displays over the possibility of being made fun of (for example, in NightBringer when he considers trying out cosplay) is emblematic of the hope he has that he can be accepted.
"But wait, daytaker," you say. "That doesn't sound like he's making progress towards his core motivation of getting joy out of the things that bring him joy! Being self conscious is not joyful!" Well, you're right. What Levi needs is to somehow find the right balance between enjoying his hobbies and allowing himself to enjoy other people as well. As we can see from his effusive excitement in sharing his favorite games and stories with MC and his brothers, the social component of media consumption is a major component in making it enjoyable. If Levi loses hope, he loses that connection to the world offline, and if he loses that connection, he loses the joy.
@blackstqr (I did it.)
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zabo-writes · 1 year
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Mumbo is a God (He thinks everyone else is also a god, but that they’ve just been really good at pretending to be human)
Mumbo was beginning to suspect he was on the receiving end of a remarkably complex prank.
This put him in a predicament. Should he go along with it? He knew it was more fun if he did. If Mumbo Jumbo knew one thing, it was how to commit to a joke.
However, this had been going on for years now. Mumbo was starting to get one of those feelings in his gut that was the kind of gut feeling people describe when they say they have a “gut feeling” about something.
And being that Mumbo did not have a gut, or any human body parts for that matter, one could see why this was distressing to him.
Mumbo Jumbo was a god. Specifically, the god of redstone. All of the other hermits were gods as well. The crux of the issue here was that all of the other hermits had been pretending to be humans for about 10 years now. And by pretending, Mumbo meant seriously, seriously roleplaying. He’d tested it! There’d been multiple instances where he had tried to convince another hermit to break character and do something godly. And they never cracked!
Truly, Mumbo was impressed. He himself was not quite as unshakeable. There’d been a few moments where his facade had cracked: the time he accidentally made a perfectly circular pumpkin (big problem in a world made of squares), the time where he put too power into the redstone AI for grumbot and gave it an existential crisis, the incident where he may have slightly consumed Grian’s soul…
All that was to say, Mumbo wasn’t the best at pretending to be a human, but he was giving it his best effort. And it seemed like the other hermits, in some sort of years-long prank, were keeping up the joke until Mumbo got it right.
Well if that was the case, he’d finally caught on! Haha! Take that, other hermits! Mumbo finally figured out the prank where everyone else pretended for a very long time that they weren’t actually—
Gods.
Wait.
They were gods, right?
Scar with his magnificent terraining skills, Cleo with her armor stands…
And surely Grian was some sort of trickster god. Right?
All of his friends were so talented, he had simply assumed it was related to some sort of godly domain.
Come to think of it, did he have any confirmation that they ever were gods in the first place?
No, no, no… surely…
Mumbo paused his task of mindlessly mining out a very large area under his base. He blinked. The netherite pickaxe clattered as it hit the floor.
Oh, he was an absolute spoon.
———
Grian grumbled as he shuffled through every chest and shulker he owned for what felt like the billionth time. He could’ve sworn he left the materials to make a beacon somewhere around here. Did it “lag” into someone’s inventory again? He pulled out his communicator to put a message in the chat.
“Grian! Incoming!”
Grian looked up just in time to see Mumbo collide with his face, sending them both sprawling across the floor.
“Ah! Hello Mumbo, fancy seeing you here! Do you happen to know where my beacon is?” Grian laughed as he dusted himself off.
“This is not the time! Grian! Grian I’m having a crisis.” Mumbo lamented,
“Yes, so am I! My beacon is gone!”
Mumbo continued, undeterred, “Grian, I have a very important question for you, and I need you to be completely honest with me.”
“Okay?”
“What does your true form look like?”
“My what?”
“Alright, alright. So you know how I’m a god?”
Grian stated incredulously at the mustachioed man before him. “WHAT?”
Mumbo groaned and put his head in his hands. “No, I really need you to be honest. I’m a god, you’re a god, bdubs is a god… we all are, right?”
Grian was not sure how to respond to this. He was, to his knowledge, as human as they come. “I think this is a sitting down conversation.”
After a long, long chat inside of Grian’s bedroom, Grian felt he was finally understanding the situation. He was taking it pretty well! As well as one can take your best friend explaining to you in the same breath that he is a deity, and oh— by the way, he thought this whole time that you were as well.
“Okay, okay. Let me get this straight. You’ve been pretending to be human this whole time because you thought you had to?”
“I thought it was a game!” Mumbo exclaimed, burying his face in the pillows on Grian’s bed. “I thought it was a game, like an ‘I’m not going to kill anything for a season’ type of game!”
“Right, but in this case the game was ‘pretending to be human for multiple years without mentioning the fact that you’re a god’?”
“…. Yes.”
Grian cackled “Well, Mumbo, I can assure you, if that ever was a game, you’ve certainly won! I would never have suspected you.”
Mumbo nodded sagely. “Yes, it’s the mustache. A classic human disguise.”
“You don’t really have a mustache?!”
Mumbo cocked his head. “Grian, you’ve seen my real form! Or, a depiction of it, I suppose. The redstone god? From the buildswap we did?”
“That was ages ago! And wait, did you just make a self portrait for that prompt, then?!”
“Yes! That’s why I thought you knew!”
“Somehow that feels like cheating. I should go get Pearl and have her re-evaluate the results of that build swap with this new information”
A look of concern crossed Mumbo’s face. “Oh, I didn’t even think that. I’m going to have to explain this to everyone, aren’t I?”
Grian shrugged, “I’m sure it’s fine. Say, could I see your ‘god’ form, O great and powerful Mumbo Jumbo? Now you have me curious.”
“Well I could, but I might destroy your ceiling.” Mumbo looked up at the rafters sheepishly.
“Back outside we go then”
Safely on the grass behind Grian’s base, Mumbo transformed into his full form for the first time in what felt like ages.
The form was that of a large humanoid figure, as tall as Grian’s house, made of red terracotta and loose redstone dust that fell and scattered like sand with every movement Mumbo made. His eyes were two glowing redstone lamps that flickered with emotion, reminiscent of a certain robot they had built before.
It occurred to Mumbo at that moment that if his friends were truly human, this form might be quite scary to them. He knelt down to look at Grian, bracing himself to handle whatever fear was in his friend's eyes.
Instead, Grian was grinning like a madman.
“Oh, we are SO pranking Scar with this.”
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jewreallythinkthat · 7 months
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Ok so ... Today's absolutely fucking batshit post that I had to read with my own two eyes
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We all know Mohamed Hadid is a foaming at the mouth antisemite but this is a new level.
Let's start with the caption:
1. The implication all Jews are American? Insane, untrue, erasing all Jewish history in Israel which dates back to before the Arabization of the middle east.
2. No one has a single percent of Semite in them because Semite is not a race, it's an obsolete term for a family of languages (including both Hebrew and Arabic) however I need to specify that "Antisemitism" was coined as a term specifically about Jew hate. That's what it means, it's actually nothing to do with the language Hebrew at all, it was an attempt to sciencify "judenhass" and make it sound acceptable.
Now to the post itself:
3. If you demand an end to colonialism, boy have I got something to explain about why the official language of Morocco, a country the width of a continent away from the Arabian Peninsula is Moroccan Arabic... Or to be honest, the reason that Arabs are the main demographic anywhere outside the Arabian Peninsula where they originally came from. I understand that peoples migrate but that involves moving from one place to another, not expanding our and literally colonising everything around you. The Arab conquests of the MENA region are a well documented part of history...
4. Demanding a ceasefire is all well and good but we are all aware that we will never be going back to the status quo of before - which frankly is all a ceasefire with no actual work done to rebuild and move towards peace will do. A ceasefire neccestiates thought on what happens next. This is not to say people shouldn't be advocating for an cease to the fighting, they should, this all needs to end. What people have to also do is also be discussing what happens next. The old status quo was unsustainable, and with the mounting evidence that Gazans who worked in Israel helped with the planning of Black Saturday, we will never again see the relations between the people in southern Israel and those in Gaza go "back to normal".
I would love a ceasefire but we need to talk about what happens next in the same conversation. To ignore that is at best naïve and at worst, willfully ignorant because just stopping and Israel withdrawing will do nothing to help rebuild because we all know that everyone will lose interest if that happens, as has happened over and over again.
5. It's well known that Jews are indigenous to Israel and the ancient kingdom of Judea. It's literally in the etymology of the world. Now, obviously multiple groups can be indiginous to one area, but length of time residing there is not a marker of indiginunity, it's literally a childlike playground tactic. Straight up rewriting history... We all know how bad that is.
Mohamed Hadid has over a million followers. His daughters have a total of 130 million. They can post misinformation and almost ten times the number of Jews who exist in the world will see it. This is so dangerous and frankly this level of deranged lying on the internet does not nothing to help end the war, it just puts Jews outside of Israel more at risk. We are being murdered in the streets, in our places of work and everyone is cheering it on.
The irony of people applauding the murder of Jews calling us neo-nazis is not lost on me and it's unreal that we aren't even allowed to stand up to it. Let's be very blunt here, if you are justifying the slaughter of Jews, who's the real nazi?
An additional Edit:
There will never be a ceasefire without release of the hostages and bodies kidnapped into Gaza. Like it's so stupid to think otherwise. Especially with Hamas currently refusing to give a list of who is still alive (they said they couldn't give a list until they knew the terms of a ceasefire which clearly means they COULD do it, but they are choosing not to)
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