#the next chapter is cute af

[homicydlgoth]

for any of you who read my stuff on ao3, the update for Here’s My Hand (There’s The Itch) is COMING, i promise! 😭 the last few months have been hectic as hell for me and i’ve just not had a lot of motivation to sit down and write. but i have not given up on the story and i look forward to posting chapter 11 ASAP. love you guys, thanks for always checking in on me and showing your support, it means the fucking universe. xx

[songbirdtana]

I’ve been planning out this fic idea for at least 6 months now and with the amount of writing I’ve scraped and changed I feel like I’ve already got a complete fic, when in reality I’m only just getting into properly writing the first chapter lmao

[redwing4life]

Forgotten Alarms

CHAPTER 1 | ASHES TO EMBERS

PAIRING: Firefighter!Neighbour!Bucky x Fem!Reader

WARNINGS: Mentions of night terrors, trapped in small spaces, brief mention of reader being worried about bucky holding her weight, nothing else other than bucky being cute af

SUMMARY: When you get stuck in an elevator with your neighbour (who also happens to be your crush), you discover your interest in the firefighter isn’t as one-sided as you thought.

WORD COUNT: 2736

NEXT CHAPTER

“You’re late, doll.”

The teasing voice of your neighbour catches you off guard when you open your front door; your hand slaps over your heart as you jump from shock.

“Says you” you smirk as you come down from the surprise. You step out of your door fully, turning and pulling it shut behind you.

Bucky chuckles, locking his own door while you do the same. He can’t help but sneak another glance your way - a light blush creeping up your neck under his gaze.

You think you’d be used to him by now, have your little crush under control seeing as you find yourselves leaving for work at the same time regularly. And yet here you are, heart beating faster than you’d like while you fumble with your keys.

Despite being late for work, Bucky waits for you to finish locking up before falling into step beside you as you walk down the hallway to the elevator.

“So let me guess, you slept through your alarm again?” The firefighter raises a brow, amused by your flushed appearance - unsure if that’s his effect on you or the fact your shift started five minutes ago.

“Worse,” you wince, “didn’t even set the damn thing.”

If you didn’t love it so much so much, you’d be inclined to be offended at the snort of a laugh he lets out. “Oh, doll.” Bucky shakes his head with a grin still left on his lips.

“What ‘bout you, Barnes? Spend too much time doing your hair?”

One unamused glare your way and now you’re the one giggling. Walking up to the elevator, you press the button to go down before stepping back to face Bucky.

“I’ll have you know, I woke up looking this good” He winks at you, hoping you’ll accept his non-answer for an answer. But you both know why he woke up late.

He barely even fell asleep, now that his nightmares are back.

His screams travel through the thin walls at night, falling on concerned ears. You pretend as though you don’t hear his night terrors but he sees the slight tug at your brows the next morning, the way you’re desperate to ask if he’s okay. But you never do; you don’t want to make him uncomfortable. You offered your help once, and you’re not sure you have the right to ask again.

“Who said you look good?” You tease, hoping to lighten the mood.

The elevator dings and the doors open. “Well the old lady whose cat we saved yesterday said I was the most handsome man in town” He smirks as you both step inside.

“Oh that’s high praise, Barnes” You reply, watching as he presses the ground floor button.

A comfortable silence falls upon the elevator as it roars back to life. Pulling out your phone, you fire a quick text to your boss to apologise for being late before shoving it back into your back pocket.

Bucky turns to you, “What time do you fin-“

A loud clunk sounds from above the lift and it stops moving, dropping a couple inches before coming to a halt again.

“Oh, shit” You all but whisper, almost afraid of speaking too loudly in case it sends you tumbling down.

“Well,” Bucky’s eyes are on the ceiling, “that didn’t sound great”

If you weren’t so nervous, you might slap him for stating the fucking obvious. Your eyes fall to your hand that’s grabbed his, not even realising you’d reached for him when the lift stopped.

Your cheeks burn crimson before you release the death grip you had on his wrist, ignoring the sparks resting beneath your fingertips.

“You okay, doll?” His voice softens when he sees the fear in your eyes.

“Umm..” You stutter, voice as shaky as your hands are.

“Hey, hey,” Bucky’s hands are on your shoulders now, “you’re shaking, Y/n. What’s wrong? What do you need me to do?”

Clenching your eyes shut, you take a deep breath. “Tell me we’re not about to fall to our deaths, please”

Your neighbour lets out a breathy ‘Oh, doll’ and strokes his thumbs over your shoulders. When you open your eyes, his blue ones bear into yours reassuringly, “We’re not gonna fall to our deaths.”

“This hunk of junk hasn’t been serviced in years but i’m pretty sure it’s just jammed or the powers cut out. Either way, we’re gonna be just fine” He continues.

You let out a wavering breath and nod slowly. “Okay. So what now?” You ask.

Bucky drops one of his hands to get his phone (much to your dismay), “I’m gonna call for the crew to come get us”

“Wait,” You frown, “why not press the help button?”

Bringing his phone to his ear, Bucky replies as it starts ringing. “Well, after Mr Garvey lugs his ass outta bed, he’d be calling them anyways. Might as well avoid being stuck here longer than we have to”

Ahh, Mr Garvey; the landlord to the whole building who also happens to be the laziest fucker around.

You mumble and ‘okay’ and roll your bottom lip between your teeth - completely unaware of the admiring eyes on you.

Eventually, a voice sounds from the other side of the phone and Bucky explains the situation, rambling off the information they need to find you. With a quick thank you, the call is over and you’re left with nothing but time to waste.

Your eyes follow the man before you as he approaches the far wall, sliding down it till he’s sat with one leg stretched out, the other bent at the knee where he rests his elbow.

“It’s alright, doll. You can sit down, it won’t break anything” He cocks his head to side, eyeing up your hesitant features.

You choose to trust him; after all, he is the one best qualified to know what will and won’t make this obnoxiously small lift crash to the ground.

Letting yourself drop to the floor, you sit with your knees up due to the lack of space to stretch your legs. Bucky is right in front of you, the tight squeeze seemingly not bothering him.

“Great day to be late, huh” You scoff lightly.

“Yeah well, at least we’re together”

A laugh escapes you, drawing a confused expression from your neighbour. “Let’s not pretend as though you need me here. If it weren’t for me you’d probably be climbing outta this thing”

“You overestimate my abilities, sweets. I’m no spider-man” He replies. Those damn pet names make you blush every time.

“You know,” you tilt your head a little to the left, “I can’t think of anyone who still uses ‘doll’ or ‘sweets’ aside from you”

You swear there’s a glint in Bucky’s eye when he replies, “Do you blush when someone calls you ‘baby’ as much as you do when I call you ‘doll’?”

Thinking for a moment, you shyly shake your head in response; he raises his brows at you, as though your answer proves his point. You wonder if he’s old fashioned in other ways. If he’s one to buy his girl flowers or open a car door for them. Maybe he’s just as polite in bed, though you find yourself disappointed at the thought. God, you need to stop thinking of him like that, no matter how hot he would look between your-

“You seeing that fella from last week again?”

Bucky’s question brings you out of your day dreams and you’re surprised by it, unaware he had any interest in your love life.

“Peter?” He nods. “No, I don’t think so. We weren’t really one the same page, if that makes sense”

“How so?”

You shrug slightly, “He’s fresh out of college and looking for a fuck buddy, not a genuine relationship.” You look away from Bucky as you continue. “And even if I wanted that, he’s hardly mature enough to know what he’s doing”

With your gaze settled on your hands, you miss the way Bucky starts biting his lip as he wonders what type of man would fulfil your needs. He shakes his head clear of those thoughts, not wanting to make a fool of himself.

“What about you? Haven’t heard any visitors at yours for a little while” You comment, hoping he doesn’t think you’ve been spying on him.

He lets out a dry laugh, “Lets just say I prefer my nights off with a beer and listening to you play the piano.”

“Oh god, you hear that?” You cover your face with your hands when he nods. “I hope I don’t disturb you. I didn’t think it-“

“It’s fine, doll,” he nudges your thigh with his boot, “I like it”

Your cheeks burn yet again as you drop your hands. “You do?”

“How could I not? You play beautifully. I’ve thought of slipping a request under your door but I didn’t wanna be the creep next door”

You giggle, “You couldn’t be creepy if you tried, Barnes”

“In that case, you should know my cat loves your music too”

With a gasp, you lean closer to Bucky till you’re sat cross legged barely a foot away from him. “James Barnes, the firefighter, has a cat!?”

You revel in his hearty laugh, eyes dancing across his face. From the crinkles at the corners of his eyes to the deep smile lines framing his mouth, you can’t help but be drawn to his beauty.

He sobers up. “Her name’s Alpine.” He says, “She was left at the firehouse a couple of years ago so I took her home with me. She’s probably the only thing that loves your music more than me”

A grin tugs at your lips as you enjoy the thought of your neighbour cuddled up with a little cat.

“If we make it outta here alive, I wanna meet her”

“We’ll be fine, doll. The crew’ll be here any minute now”

You hum and silence consumes the air once more. The soft dim glow of the overhead lights falls gracefully on your features and Bucky can’t pull his eyes away. He knows you’re not too fond of the situation you’re both in and yet he can’t help but thank whatever beings made this happen; to finally have an excuse to talk to you longer than your usual small talk, to tell you how much he’s in awe your piano playing.

He’s not ready to tell you that he’s rather in awe of you, too. Maybe next time you’re stuck in a lift together.

With the silence so heavy on your ears, your mind drifts to the reason you’re here in the first place. The reason he is here.

The nightmares.

You know he hasn’t slept properly in weeks; the dark circles beneath his eyes are just a glimpse of his exhaustion. And as much as you’re scared of pushing him away, the weight on your chest is growing too heavy to bear.

“I know you’re having nightmares again.”

Bucky stills.

“Those screams, James, I-“

“It’s nothing” He cuts you off with stern words. Your brows pull together, eyes laced with worry.

“It doesn’t sound like nothing. I thought they got better.“

His head falls back against the wall behind him, “Well you thought wrong.”

You curse yourself beneath your breath as you run your hands through your hair, searching for the right thing to say.

“I’m worried about you, James.” You breathe, eyes fluttering shut. You’re scared that if you look at him, you’ll cave in and promise to never ask about it again. “I get that i’m just your neighbour but I can’t keep acting like I can’t see there’s something wrong.“

“There is nothing wrong!” Bucky’s tone is sharp, not quite shouting but no longer calm.

Your eyes snap open, training on the clench of his jaw, the sole hint of any emotion on his face.

“I’m dealing with it. So you need to stop acting like you know me because you don’t.”

And there it goes. The worry in your chest morphs into regret. Regret for bringing it up, regret for thinking you could help, regret for hearing his screams in the first place.

“Okay”

Bucky hates how timid your voice is, barely loud enough over the ringing of his own heartbeat. That and the voice in his head telling him he’s a piece of shit. He wishes he could take it all back but he doesn’t know how to, so he decides that silence is better than opening his damn mouth and making things worse.

The pair of you sit there in silence, one that’s far less comfortable than before, and stare at the ceiling, waiting for help to arrive.

When it does, you count your lucky stars that the lift stopped just at the doors to the second floor. Bucky helps the crew pull the doors open enough for you both to climb through. You feel his blue eyes on you as you wait for them to stabilise the lift, avoiding his gaze at all costs.

“Okay, Ma’am,” One of the firefighters calls, the name ‘Rogers’ written on his jacket, “we need you guys to climb up here and we’ll pull you out.”

Your eyes widen at the thought of pulling yourself up there, suddenly very aware of your frankly appalling upper body strength.

Rogers catches the hesitation on your face. “Don’t worry, Buck will help you up so you can get out first”

Turning to look at your neighbour, you lock eyes for the first time in ten minutes. His lips are turned into an awkward half smile, changing his entire demeanour from one of a brooding firefighter to a sheepish kid.

You don’t know how long the pair of you stand there staring at each other, but it’s long enough for Roger’s to clear his throat in attempt to regain your attention.

Bucky steps closer to you while the crew get ready above you. “You okay with this, doll?”

You nod, “As long as this thing doesn’t fall while i’m half way through and snap my body in half, i’m good”

That heartwarming laugh fills your ears and the firefighter shakes his head in amusement. At least he doesn’t hate you enough to leave you to get out on your own.

“Well lucky for you, that ain’t gonna happen”

You roll your bottom lip between your teeth. “Okay, how is this gonna work?”

Bucky moves to stand below the gap, facing you. He lowers himself down to one knee before reaching for your hand.

His skin is warm but rough, gentle but strong as he pulls you closer to him. The unexpected tug on your hand sends you tumbling toward him, your right hand bracing yourself on his shoulder to regain your balance while his free hand lands on your hip.

You mumble an apology, flustered at the intense heat beneath his hands and the way Bucky is looking up at you.

“You good?” He asks, voice dripping with awe, though you’re oblivious to the admiration, still plagued by the way he shut you down earlier.

When you nod, Bucky removes his hand from your hip and taps his knee. “You’re gonna step on my knee, then on my shoulder and you then should be close enough for Steve to grab you and pull you out”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you” You admit, nervous at the thought of letting Bucky take your body weight on his shoulders.

He looks up at you through his lashes “Do you trust me, sweets?”

“Yes” You reply, not even having to think about it. There may be some walls between you, but you know he’s on the other side, waiting.

“Good, then get up here”

Bucky shouts up to the crew that he’s giving you a boost now and after hearing them shout back that they’re ready, you place your foot on Bucky’s knee and push yourself up.

“Don’t drop me” You warn, reaching up to the gap in preparation.

“Wouldn’t dream of it”

And with that, you climb onto your neighbours shoulders and stretch up for Steve to grab your hands.

Along with Bucky pushing your feet up, Steve pulls you out and you slide through the gap until you’re free of that god forsaken elevator.

“Well thank fuck for that” You groan, spread across the floor on your back, making the crew laugh.

You barely have time to recover before Bucky is stood above you, having lugged himself out with ease.

“Guess you won’t be forgetting to set your alarm again, ay?”

NEXT CHAPTER

a/n: first chapterrrrrr! hope you enjoyed, if you have any questions dm me or drop an ask <3

new chapter will be out soon, thanks to everyone to voted on the poll i put out, i hope it’s as good as you wished it would be :)

comment if you’d like to be added to my ashes to embers taglist 🧡

[owliellder]

Two's A Crowd

College Bully! Leon Kennedy x fem! Reader

MDNI 18+

(Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5)

Description: College is proving to be a lot harder than you imagined. You cannot fail this math class. So when you've tried everything else, a well-known student is recommended to you by your professor for tutoring lessons, not really leaving you with much of a choice but to work with him.

Warnings: Not proofread, No Use of Y/N, Dub-Con, Unprotected Sex, Bullying, Yelling, Cursing

Tags: College AU, Bully! Leon, Shy! Reader, both are in their early 20's, Leon is Rude AF in the beginning, Loss of Virginity, Oral Sex, Fingering, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Additional Tags to be Added

Author's Note: Forgiveness is requested but not expected. Downhill we go!!

Cross-posted onto AO3

Chapter 3:

Over time, you grew less and less worried with Leon’s nice behavior. Your math grade has gone up significantly, surpassing a low C which is a passing grade, but since the tutor sessions have become much more bearable, you haven’t felt the need to stop going. Besides, you have an A streak to fulfill.

Your friends stayed suspicious about the frat boy’s intentions, however. The way you’d become so unbothered with everything relating to him had them stressed, yet at the end of the day, “no asshole can hold up a facade like that for this long”, as per Sky’s words.

Easygoing is the best way to describe Leon at this point. A gentle soul, from what you can tell. He goes out of his way to hold the door for you, share his food with you whenever he brings it, and he even gets excited with you whenever you get an A on any of your assignments or tests. It makes you happy that you held out for him.

“And that makes sense to you?” Leon was standing next to you, leaned over with both his hands on the table. You were both in the study room, only this time you had finished everything math related. Thanksgiving break had come and gone so everything had shifted towards the finals before Winter break, meaning now you were using the space to go over the study guide for the final given by one of your other professors, though it would’ve been nice to have your math study guide to burn into your brain since it’s your biggest struggle.

“Yeah, this is easy for me,” you mutter, hand against your mouth as your eyes move back and forth across the packet of information in front of you. Having Leon leaning over you had been commonplace since mid-November. He turned out to be very nosey. “Shouldn’t you be focusing on your own classes?”

You didn’t need to look at him to know he was extremely confused by your study guide. “Uhh.. nah,” he stood upright and slowly made his way around the table, sitting down in front of you with a small groan as he relaxed into the seat. “I’ve made it through the past couple years here without ‘em. No need for ‘em now.” You nodded to the side at his, bringing the pen you were holding up to your mouth to nibble on the end of it. “Makes sense…”

It took awhile before you noticed his nervous fidgeting, looking up from your study guide to give him a worried look. “Are you bored? I can finish up in my dorm if you-”

“Do you want to get dinner with me tonight?” He cut you off, his eyes meeting yours before the room fell silent. The question was so sudden and you weren’t expecting anything like it, so it just had you confused. You must’ve looked it, too, since he moved his eyes away from yours while crossing his arms. “I mean-.. Y’know, figured I’d ask..”

Seeing him get nervous was always pretty cute to you, such a handsome guy getting worked up over you never failed to flatter you. “Oh, yeah! I’d like that, actually..” You giggled when Leon looked back at you, soon grabbing your few supplies to put back into your backpack. 

Relief spread across his face, moving to stand as you collected your items. “Good, okay, uh.. How’s Olive Garden sound?” To the average college student, Olive Garden was some high class fine dining. Anyone would be a fool to say no to an offer like that.

Just like your friend told you not to do, the absolute biggest no-no when it came to these types of college guys, you let Leon get even closer. It was just dinner in the beginning, but you started seeing him outside of study sessions afterwards with him going out of his way to seek you out and hang out with you and you the same. “Just going out to dinner” turned into dates real fast, faster than you even had time to process. 

You’ve almost completely forgotten about just how nasty he was towards you not three months prior with how he doted on you. Leading up to finals week, Leon made sure to bring you food after noticing your long study habits. He wouldn’t even give you a choice, just a simple “whaddya feeling tonight?” over text. He’d hang out in your dorm with you while you ate, much to your roommates dismay, and sometimes he’d just show up for no reason other than to see you. You’d blush and shy away from his flirting, he’d tease you, and you’d get mad at him for distracting you in a playful way. Even if you wanted to be actually mad at him, you couldn’t, not with that cheeky little grin he’d give you.

You never questioned his nosiness as he familiarized himself with your dorm, rummaging through your drawers as you whined at him from the bed to stay out of your stuff. Honestly, you’d probably look through his stuff too if you had the chance.

Having a boyfriend during your first year of college wasn’t exactly a goal, and you don’t know if this is even a relationship or not, but you weren’t complaining. It was so nice having someone care about you like this, especially when it’s someone who’s, to you, way out of your league in almost every sense. Though he wasn’t the most outgoing, he was very well known, and being seen with him meant the attention he received was spilling onto you. Hell, you didn’t even know he played football until he passed by you with his friends, all in their football get-ups. He never bragged about any practices or games to you, maybe you should’ve asked about the various bruises and scuffs he’d show up to the study sessions with. Oh well.

Every night during finals week, Leon would take you out for dinner under the guise of “destressing from the long day”, not that you minded, of course. You were growing increasingly anxious about your last final, the big one; math. The two of you were sitting in his black Jeep Wrangler as it idled out in the parking lot of McDonald’s, snacking on what was left of your meal in a comfortable silence. The combination of the heater blowing on you and the food in your stomach was settling you, if only a little.

Leon kept his eyes on you the entire time, hand rubbing soothingly up and down your thigh. His hand was so warm. “You’ll pass, I know you will.” His soft touch barely had you cracking a smile, looking through the windshield as large snowflakes quietly fell, lit up by the streetlights surrounding the parking lot and by the headlights on his car. The snow had accumulated an inch on the ground already, the sun having set nearly two hours prior. Winter and its short days, a blessing and a curse. “I don’t know..” You could feel his eyes on you, yet yours were stuck staring out at the falling snow. “My nerves always get me. I’m gonna make the stupidest mistakes and then once the final grades are in my parents’ll wanna see and then I’ll be surrounded be disappointment and shame and guilt.”

You closed your eyes and slumped your shoulders when you felt Leon squeeze your thigh, finally able to turn and look back at him. “You know that’s not how it’s gonna go.” He let out a breathy laugh when you raised an eyebrow. “Oh come on, you’ve got it down! Plus, you had an amazing tutor~..”

With a dramatic groan, you rolled your eyes as he wiggled his eyebrows at you, unable to hide your smile. “I guess, but you weren’t that amazing..”

Leon moved his free hand and brought it up to his chest, holding it there with a strong pout to feign hurt. “You wound me.. Was I nothing to you?” His smile quickly returned when you clicked your tongue at him, chuckling through his nose. “Seriously though, I’ve never met anyone as smart as you are. You learned how to do that kind of stuff incredibly fast, so I don’t have a single doubt in my mind that you won’t demolish that final.” His compliments always left you blushing and at a loss for words, playfulness giving way to a more heavy air. “Thank you, Leon. Really, thank you...” 

You were too wrapped up in watching the snow fall through the windshield to notice when his hand pulled away from your thigh, or just how guilty he looked as he silently watched you.

The math final was easier than you were expecting. You understood basically everything that had been put on it minus a couple things that you scolded yourself for not brushing up on last minute. Grades weren’t put in until a week or more after the finals were turned in, yet you were confident enough in how it went to feel good leaving that room afterwards. 

This first semester had really tested your limits, but you were lucky to have your friends, lucky to have Leon. It didn’t feel strange having him around anymore, it felt natural, real. There weren’t enough ways to thank him for all that he did between tutoring you and taking care of you overall. 

You yelped with laughter as Sky picked you up, their arms around your midriff, waving you side to side as they yelled how proud they were of you. Ella only stood by and laughed along, making sure to take a picture of the moment as keepsakes. “Guys, I don’t even know if I passed yet!” You pushed away from Sky and they placed you back down on the ground, smoothing out your shirt which had you swatting their hands away.

“But! You survived and that’s always cause for celebration.” Ella pocketed her phone and took a couple steps forward so you were all standing in a small circle now. “You really pulled through these last few months.”

Thanks to Leon. “I did, huh?” You looked down with a bashful smile, shrugging before pulling the strap on your backpack further up so it wouldn’t slip off your shoulder. “You know,” Sky started, resting their elbow on your other shoulder while pursing their lips as they slowly turned their head to look at you, “you’re not very good at hiding your love for Leon..” 

You weren’t trying to hide it, it's just that even the vaguest thought about the man had you flustered and stumbling over your words like a fool. All you could do now was glare at your friend, who just raised their hands up in defense. “Hey now, not poking fun, just making an observation.”

Ella placed her entire hand over Sky’s face and pushed them away from you, ignoring their muffled complaints as she looked at you. “We’ll always be suspicious because we’re your friends and we care about you, but as long as you’re careful, we’ll keep our distance.”

Sky pulled Ella’s hand off their face, making gross-out noises while wiping their face off. “Blegh, anyways, yeah. Keeping our distance, but still watching from afar.” They pointed their index and middle finger from their eyes to yours before smiling.

You hung around in their dorm as Ella finished packing up her suitcase. She’s had her plane ticket back home booked for a month, constantly expressing her need to leave as soon as finals were finished during that time. Sky was leaving the same day you were, which was in two days since you both drove or were driven here. Leon stayed at his frat house all school year, so you were thankful to have two people sticking around so you weren’t left all alone.

Unfortunately, this meant you had your own packing to do. Thankfully though, your roommate had already left, sparing you from their menial chit-chat. Packing was almost cathartic in a weird way, almost as if you saw going home as a reward for working yourself to the bone at this university. Quiet music was playing from your phone as you gathered the essentials, you’d be coming back in three weeks so there wasn’t any need to pack up everything.

A gentle knock knock knock at your dorm’s door startled you from your thoughts, causing you to blink a few times to make sure it wasn’t just coming from the song that was playing. Slowly, you made your way over to the door, and before you’d even opened it fully, Leon slipped his way through, side stepping into the room with a cheeky smile. 

You scoffed as you watched him weasel his way in, hand stuttering away from the door handle to allow the heavy door to shut. “You could’ve waited until I opened the door all the way.” 

“I knocked, though.” Mischief was evident in his tone as his eyes landed on the suitcase sitting on your bed. “Getting ready to leave?”

“Not for another couple days. Just.. wanna be ready.” You walked past him over to your suitcase, continuing to fold the last few pieces of clothing you wanted to bring back home. “Perfect, got some extra time to spend with you then.” Leon chuckled, now standing next to you to watch you get back into rhythm.

Having him admit that so casually had you nervous, cheeks heating up as you glanced over at him. “Wouldn’t you rather hang out with your friends?” The eyebrow raise he gave you made you stumble as you tried to elaborate. “N-not that I don’t want to hang out with you! I just feel like you’d have more fun celebrating the end of the semester outside of a stuffy dorm.” You tried to laugh away the embarrassment, moving your focus back to the suitcase as you zipped it up.

“I can celebrate with those slobs any time, but for right now, I would really like to be around you.” Leon carefully lifted your suitcase off the bed, placing it near the door for you. “You’re nice and quiet. They’re not.” You sighed after lifting yourself up onto your bed, sitting criss-cross right in the middle while meekly smiling to yourself, watching him walk back over to stand in front of you.

“By the way,” he said, turning his head to look out your window for a split second before looking back down at you, “I haven’t had the chance to tell you how proud I am of you for coming out of that math final. I know results take awhile, but you seem pretty pleased with yourself.” He crossed his arms and bent forward a bit with a teasing smirk as he not-so-subtly looked you up and down.

You covered your face with your hands and laughed into them, a poor attempt to hide your ever increasing blush. After letting your hands fall away, you bunched the end of your hoodie up in them, fiddling with the thick fabric as you replied. “Yeah, uh.. I think I did alright.” You were going to say more, but you stopped when Leon’s hand found its way under your chin, tilting your head back so you were looking at him. “C’mon, don’t downplay this, baby. You did amazing and you know it.”

Your mind went blank at the pet name and you were finding it hard to breathe with the way his hand felt under your chin. The air in your dorm was a tad tense before, yet now it just felt heavy. Stifling. All you could do was stare up at him with wide eyes, eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly as you tried to think of something, anything to say.

“Did I catch you off guard?” He said with a breathy laugh, gently tilting your head side to side as he studied you. And you let him. Your mouth felt dry, face hot as he leaned in closer. “You’re so beautiful..” His voice dropped an octave and his eyes were lidded as they stared into yours. “So smart, so brave..” Soon his lips were brushing against yours, whispering out a final “So perfect..” before pulling you into a gentle kiss.

It didn’t take long for you to relax into the kiss, eyes fluttering shut as you tried to mimic Leon’s movements. His hands cautiously slid down to grasp at your waist while yours moved up to cup his face, pulling him closer. He slowly crawled onto the bed with you tugging him along, leaving you laying down as he hovered over the top of you, knees planted on either side of your legs while one of his arms moved up to support himself. 

He was doing his best to be careful with you, noting your nervous tremble as his right hand slid under your hoodie. “M’gonna take care of you, ‘kay?” He hummed against your sensitive skin, kissing along the underside of your jawline. You only nodded as his lips trailed down your neck, stopping when your hoodie got in his way of the rest of you. “Need you to say ‘okay’ f’me, baby.”

Nearly whining when he stopped, you nodded again a bit more vigorously this time, voice barely a whisper. “O-..Okay..” You propped yourself up slightly when Leon pulled his head away from your neck, his eyes meeting yours as both his hands were now playing with the end of your hoodie. “Y-Yeah, okay…” You repeated.

First it was your hoodie, then it was his jacket, and before you knew it, he had you in his arms, chest pressed against yours as he reached around to unclasp the hooks on your bra. You immediately brought your arms up to cover your breasts once Leon leaned back after pulling your bra off, self-consciousness suddenly settling in. “Hey hey, no need to hide from me..” He cooed, eyes raking down your body as he grabbed your hands to pull your arms away, thumbs rubbing circles onto the tops of your hands as he stared with a crooked smile. 

You took the opportunity to take in his form; muscular, a couple old scars and freckles standing out to you. He was gorgeous, through and through, no doubt about it. He took notice, craning his neck to look down at his exposed chest before looking back up at you. “Looks good, huh?” That got a small giggle out of you, at least.

He slowly guided you back down onto the bed, his hands firmly rubbing up and down your sides. “You look even better, though. Layin’ pretty beneath me~..” His right hand found its way to your panties, running his fingers along the band before trailing further down to press his middle finger against the gusset. You gasped at the feeling while he laughed quietly, leaning back a bit further to catch a glimpse of the wet spot he was feeling. “You’re soaked.. Lil’ bit of touching got you all worked up?”

Your hands flew up to hide your face again as he rubbed his finger up and down your clothed pussy, letting out small gasps and whimpers all the while. You shakily nodded, subconsciously spreading your legs further apart as he slotted himself between them. 

“Tell me something, babe.” Leon paused his movements to look up at you, huffing a chuckle through his nose when he noticed you’d covered your face. “You seem real nervous, so I’m jus’ wonderin’...” Dread settled in your stomach at his implication, you were hoping he wouldn’t ask this. “Yes..” You whispered, parting your fingers over your right eye so you could look at him. “Don’t make me say it, please…”

He hummed low in his chest, eyes darkening as they moved back down to your panties. “Juuust wonderin', is all..” His finger started to caress you over your panties again while adding a bit more pressure. “There’s no shame in being a virgin. Only means I gotta make this extra special for you~.” You moved your hands to shoot him a weak glare and he smiled in return. “Didn’t say I couldn’t say it.”

Once he felt your tremble start to dissipate, he brought his hands up and hooked his fingers on the band of your panties before slowly tugging them off, letting out a low groan as a string of slick stayed connected to the gusset from your leaking pussy. “Fuck, that’s hot..” He breathed in sharply through his teeth, taking your panties into one hand before grabbing his hoodie, stuffing them into the large pocket in the front.

Leon didn’t waste any time putting himself back between your legs, languidly dragging his middle finger up and down through your folds. He relished in your every noise, even as you tried to hold them in. “You ever finger yourself before?” He asked, voice gravelly as he repeatedly pulled his finger back to watch your slick cling to it by a string. 

“... no..” Your innocence had him groaning to himself again. He could ignore the guilt eating away at him long enough to handle you the way you needed to be handled. “Let’s give it a try then, yeah?” He hunched over some more so his face was hovering above yours, middle finger now gently circling your clenching hole.

“P-Please be careful..” You whimpered, slightly panicked at the feeling of his finger nudging your entrance, one of your hands grasping the bed sheets while the other held onto his bicep that was closest to you.  “I’ll be so careful, baby.. I promise I’ll be careful.”

And he was. What would’ve normally been a relatively quick process turned into ten minutes of Leon tenderly stretching you on his fingers. He studied your face the entire time, whispering sweet words into your ear, even letting out deep moans to encourage your own timid ones. You needed the time. There's no rush.

He moved down to pair his fingers with his mouth, tongue running through your wet folds as his fingers stroked your walls. The noises you let out when he sucked on your clit were intoxicating. You were intoxicating.

Once Leon pulled his mouth and fingers away from you, you knew what was coming. And when he paused for a moment after standing up, hands hooked in his boxers, eyebrows tightly furrowed together in thought, that only served to make you more nervous.

“..Leon?” You managed to say, propping yourself up on your elbows as you watched his shake himself out of his head. “Yeah, sorry, just… thinking about the best way to go about this. Don’t wanna scare you.”

“You-... I’m not gonna be scared..” You looked from his face down to his boxers, eyeballing where his fingers were still hooked in them. He just clicked his tongue, nodding his head to the side with a soft “if you say so”. 

As much as you didn’t want to admit it, you were scared. There wasn’t much frame of reference, but Leon was… sizeable, for lack of a better term. And it wasn’t just his size that was intimidating to you, it was the idea of sex itself. Sex has always been made out to be this big grandiose milestone by everyone around you, so now that you’re about to actually do it is giving you the same sinking feeling that public speaking does. 

“You’re scared.” Leon had pulled his boxers all the way down without you noticing, letting them lay abandoned on the floor as he took the small step back towards you. “No.” You were quick to object, eyes still glued to his dick. He chuckled and tilted your head back by your chin once more. “Yes, you are, and it’s okay. I’m not gonna kill you with it.”

“You might…” You muttered under your breath, eyes lowly making their way back down to his dick as he got back up onto the bed and in between your legs. “I promised you I’d be careful, right?” Leon grunted, his hand squeezing the base of his cock before giving it a few slow strokes. 

You swallowed dryly, pulling your eyes away and back up to meet his. “Yeah…” He nodded, giving you a wobbly smile as he teased his thumb across his tip. “Right. So don’t worry, I’ve gotcha..”

You only nodded, doing your best to keep your eyes up and focused on his face as he lubed himself with your juices. Your eyes widened once you felt him line himself up with your hole, body jerking a bit at the slight pressure.

“You gotta relax, sweetheart..” He used his freehand to stroke your thigh before pulling your right up over his shoulder, hand moving back down so his thumb could rub your clit. “Just breathe and focus on what my hand’s doin’, alright?”

The two of you were lucky that a lot the people in your dorm building left already, cause when his tip finally pushed past that ring of muscle, you let out an embarrassingly loud yelp. It hurt, but it was also such a new feeling that it simply startled you. “Okay, okay, that’s the hardest part. You did it.” You panted, hands tugging at the blankets beneath you as he stilled. “Okay…” You copied him, nodding your head once you felt you were ready for him to move.

The sting of the stretch was the hardest to get by, however it was easily masked by just how full you felt after Leon was fully sheathed inside you. So new, yet so good. 

You let out a shaky sigh, eyes closing as you rested back against the bed. Your heart was beating and your body felt hot. It was actually a nice feeling. “You- ugh.. You can move.. a little..” You breathed out, grunting softly when you felt him twitch.

“Mhm..” Leon agreed with only a hum, not trusting his mouth enough to speak. He pulled back an inch before thrusting just as slowly,  eyes darting around your face for any sign of discomfort. A minute or so of taking it slow led to deeper thrusts, following your command as you asked for “harder”, “deeper”, “faster”. All with that sweet voice that he couldn’t say no to.

You were eating away at him and you didn’t even know it; wrapped around him so perfectly, that delicious honey of yours dripping down his balls, moaning his name, looking at him with those glassy eyes, fuck. He fits you so well.

He kept his eyes closed, unable to look at you any longer. Ignoring the guilt was harder than he thought, even with him thrusting into you like he owned you. You weren’t his, he can't have you the way you want him to-

“Shit-!” He gasped, too lost in his own thoughts to notice you’d grown close until you abruptly clenched around him, sloppy cunt milking his cock. His thrusts stuttered to a stop as he buried himself deep into you, cumming with a whine of his own. Looking at the wall with bleary eyes, he furrowed his brow again, chewing on the inside of his cheek while he caught his breath.

Clarity crashed into him when you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him down into a weak hug. He needed to go, but how could he leave you like this? God, he was so fucked.

He should’ve just stayed an asshole, that would’ve kept you far away. And he should’ve never taken that stupid bet. All this for a pair of panties to wave around like a trophy.

tags:

@kayotee4 @k-fallingstar @bobastayhigh @mi-zer-y @chasingkennedy @l30nva @espressonerd @jjouki @5tarx @bunnybreadloaves @whoisgami @cyanscribe @c4b3r1a @darichvep @mmmangel @kingtacocat @klee-iii @baby--vera @dakiniii @kenma-izhu @aliidarling @leonsmamacita @deadghxsty @nekoheist @dumbassmortal @cassiecasluciluce @iovewilliams @maeplayscello @deddiemunsonsblog @paranoid-but-android @mariesmain @tteokhwaa @bonnibuckets @eilonwykennedy @1dk-anym0r3 @papatyacikcik

(few of your blogs won't work, but i really tried 😩)

[lazyjellyfish300]

DD pt 3 part 2 of 2

Fem reader x Miguel O'Hara who is your Uber driver

This art was commissioned to accompany this chapter by the incredibly talented @/ejpuki on Instagram. Please go support the original artist!

Pt 1 , Pt 2 , Pt 3 1 , Part 4 , Part 5

Synopsis- fem reader drinks too much and the bartender calls a random Uber for her which happens to be Miguel O'Hara himself. Her friends suck and ditch her. There's a lot of tension on the ride home...

TW: MINORS DNI, some blood, little.violence, suggestive content ,age gap (reader 26, Miguel 34), this one is a sad one, inspired by the original comic

-----

Over the next few days you two text back and forth and talk on the phone. You feel so happy and excited about this budding romance between you two. It's been so long since you felt safe enough to let yourself catch feelings for a guy. You flood his phone while he's at work. Miguel isn't used to someone texting him so often but it's kind of cute how you update him on every little thing that's happening in your day and he has to try not to burst out laughing in the break room at some of the Instagram reels you send him. 

Your text convo: 

Miguel (pookie 🐻❤️) : Why tf would you send me a video of a banana cat with that sad music 😂😐🤨 and who is that white guy that's always randomly showing up at the end of videos with that whistle tune playing? 

You(amor ❤️): it's a meme babe you don't get it😂😂😂 it's supposed to be random, that's what makes it funny af. And that's Josh Hutcherson. You've never seen or read Hunger Games?! 

Miguel(pookie 🐻❤️): no, I haven't. Your sense of humor is a little broken I'm afraid. 🤨 You kids and your memes. 

You(amor ❤️): my sense of humor is just fine 😂LMAO you're only like 8 years older than me. 😂 we're watching it immediately! And we're going to Barnes and Noble to get you a copy. 😇 

Miguel(pookie 🐻❤️): hmmm fine.😌 When would you like to, cutie? ❤️

You(amor ❤️): This weekend please? ❤️❤️❤️

Miguel(pookie 🐻❤️): I'm so sorry, I'll have Gabi with me. But she'll be at her mom's next weekend. Can we do it then? ❤️ 

You(amor ❤️): that's okay I totally understand! ❤️ Yes please! I'm so excited ❤️ I miss you... 

Miguel(pookie 🐻❤️): perfect. I miss you more. ❤️

--------- 

Next Friday

Miguel drives to work, his heart like a dead weight in his chest and his mind racing with different scenarios on how he's going to tell his boss he's had enough. This isn't what he signed up for. The project he was overseeing at work was trying to create these "special abilities"in humans. One of the test subjects passed away this week and he'd be lying to himself if he said it wasn't messing with his head. He had nightmares about her. She couldn't have been older than 19. Her blue eyes frantic as she realized she might not make it off the lab table alive. Her horrified screams ringing in his eardrums. Miguel's fist clamped tighter around the steering wheel as he choked back a sob. He felt this was his burden to shoulder alone. He knew he was falling for you steadily now, and he didn't want you to go crazy worrying about him. He knows you love to try and fix people, a lot of times to your detriment and couldn't stand to see you in that position or live with the fact that he put you there. 

 He really didn't care for his boss, Tyler Stone either. Tyler Stone was the 6'3, blonde haired, blue eyed, egotistical vice president over Research and Development at Alchemax. He and the other higher ups just spent all day figuratively (and possibly literally) sucking each other off in boardroom meetings for the hard work everyone underneath them was doing. He was a businessman, not a scientist, and it became clear to Miguel that profit came first for him over scientific discovery and advancement, and his cronies shared the same philosophy. 

Miguel faced the man now, sitting in his office. Tyler sighed and walked over to his decanter set that sat in the corner of his office on top of a polished mahogany drink cabinet. 

"Care for some bourbon?" He asked, rolling up his sleeves.

Miguel pinched the bridge of his nose and nodded, closing his eyes for a moment. 

"It pains me to hear that you're wanting to leave, it really does." Tyler says as he pours the bourbon in two short, square glasses. 

"I chose you because I believed you could handle it. Your track record doesn't lie, Miguel. You were top of your class at Columbia University. I've seen your research and read your thesis that you did with them. You know Dain was actually the one that submitted your nomination to me when I was looking for someone to promote?" Tyler hands the glass of bourbon to Miguel who murmurs a low thank you. 

"My point is, if you leave, I got no one to replace you, and that makes my job even more tough." Tyler takes a sip of his bourbon and makes a small face. "I'm going to bat for your little science project every time I meet with the board of directors. I'll be honest with you, they're ready to trim the fat." Tyler's blue eyes bore into Miguel's over the rim of his glass. "But I tell them that this process, is worth the wait. We won't have these superhuman abilities lined up for purchase on shelves tomorrow. But give or take a few years we will be the first to break 100 bil in quarterly revenue when we roll this out to the public.  My point is, I'm willing to do whatever I gotta do to keep this project afloat because I've ran the numbers, I've seen what guys like you and Dain can do. It's a worthwhile investment."

Miguel takes a sip of his bourbon and winces. Fuck it, he downs the rest of the whiskey, his throat on fire. He holds out his empty glass to Tyler who takes it and goes to refill it, his back turned to Miguel.

 "I'm sorry...." Miguel finally says. "I've made up my mind. I'm flattered that you think I'm the right person for this job, but I'm telling you, I don't want to be the guy who all of this is riding on anymore. I'm not gonna gamble if people's lives are the chips."

Tyler's face went dark and he started tapping the side of his glass, his back still turned to Miguel.

Since when did this fucker grow a conscience? He knows he wouldn't be doing this job if he wasn't getting paid for it either right? He'd given Miguel and his team resources that any group of scientists would give their left kidney for. It was thanks to him in those board meetings that those ungrateful bastards even still had a job. And now their hang up is human test subjects? 

Tyler handed Miguel back another glass and said nothing as he watched Miguel down it. Miguel winced again as he finished his liquor, throat still on fire and cheeks starting to flush. 

Tyler turned back around, looking at the now setting sun on the horizon. "I'm afraid I can't let you go." He said calmly. 

Miguel raised an eyebrow, then suddenly his face turned white when Tyler held up an empty vial of Rapture, his back still turned to him. Tyler spoke again, his back still facing Miguel. "Alchemax is the only distributor of Rapture. Leave if you want, but I'm going to have to be forced to let the board know and involve law enforcement when they realize one of their silly little scientists couldn't keep his hands out of the cookie jar and became a needy little addict." He took a long sip. 

"You're not gonna make me look like a weak little bitch in front of the whole board. I don't lose, Miguel. You're not gonna fuck this up for me." 

Enraged, Miguel shot up, shattering the shot glass in his hand, blood gushing out of his fingers. "You fucking piece of shit!" 

Tyler remained calm. "You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead. I used your sign in to get this vial from the lab. The access history and empty vial next to my dead body will just deepen the hole you dug yourself. Either do as I say, or throw away your freedom right now and kill me before you even had a chance to see your little girl go to Prom." 

Miguel paused. This fucker was playing chess with him. Tyler took another sip. "It'd be a damn shame if you did. Especially about that new slutty girlfriend of yours. Did you even get to find out what her pussy feels like?"

That was it. Miguel threw his chair against the wall, the wooden legs splintering into the cabinet Tyler was leaning up against, a neutral expression on his prick face as he sipped more bourbon. 

Miguel turned and left the office, and slammed the door so hard the receptionist let out a small squeak of terror as Miguel tore down the hallway, rage seething out of his ears. 

  "Aaron?" Tyler asked in his cold expressionless voice. 

A short, balding man in his mid-thirties with green eyes and thick black rimmed glasses stepped out from behind a two way mirror in the corner of Tyler's office. 

"You rewrote the code in Machine A-2099 in sector 8, right?" 

"Yes boss." 

--------

You hummed happily as you lit a few of your favorite vanilla almond scented candles on your coffee table. You went all out with a smorgasbord of treats for your movie date night with Miguel including popcorn, gummy worms, Milk Duds, Pretzels, M&Ms, beef jerky, and root beer floats. As soon as you got off work, you cleaned the whole apartment top to bottom and put fresh sheets on the bed. You checked your phone anxiously.

Text convo: 

Miguel (pookie 🐻❤️): Good morning beautiful ❤️ how'd you sleep? Have a great day, I'll be at your apartment at 8 pm. 

You(amor ❤️): you just made my whole morning!🥰🥰 Good morning handsome! I slept great! I'm so looking forward to movie night tonight. I have a bunch of treats and goodies for us to snack on too. 😇

Miguel (pookie 🐻❤️): that sounds wonderful, baby. ❤️ Driving to work now, I'll text you when I get there but I'm not going to be able to talk much today. I have a meeting with the boss and a bunch of other stuff related to the project I'm overseeing. Just wanted to let you know not to worry ❤️ I'll call you at 6! 

6 pm came and went and you felt sick to your stomach. 

You(amor ❤️): Babe? Everything okay, I tried you twice. 

Nothing. 

You (amor ❤️): Miguel? It's 9 pm. Are you okay? Please just call or text me to let me know everything's okay...

It was now 10 pm. He wasn't coming. Your stomach lay in knots. You had called him 28 times with no answer.

What's happening? Is he cheating on me? Did he get into an accident? Is he dead on the side of the road while I'm hundreds of miles away and can't do anything?

He gets busy at work but he always, always checks in with you. You can't help but fight back tears at his untouched root beer float sitting next to yours. You knew going into this that you had to jump, knowing you were gonna fall and he might not be there to catch you. Well, here you were with a small dagger in your heart on what was supposed to be your second date. You couldn't help but let yourself get in your head. His rejection of you this time confirmed everything you feared about yourself. You laid down on the couch and sobbed quietly to sleep. 

------

That same night at Alchemax

Miguel's painful screams reverberated off the tiled floor of the genetics lab at Alchemax. The tall powerful man he was, was writhing on the floor in agony. It was as though his blood had turned to acid. His whole body felt on fire. Please God, if I'm supposed to die right now just take me already. He hadn't felt pain this intense ever before in his life. His eyes turned bloodshot, foaming at the mouth as his saliva bubbled and splurted out in incoherent gasps. 

Aside from his screams, the machine responsible for his pain let out a low beep. Miguel knew that a copy of his original DNA sample was logged into one of the gene altering machines that he set up when he was first put in charge of Tyler's superhuman project. He knew that as long as he had a drop of Rapture in him, he'd remain an addict defenseless against his new dependency Tyler forced on him. He had tried in vain to rewrite his current biology back to the original, but Tyler was one step ahead. Tyler knew nothing about science or how DNA worked, but it didn't take much to convince Miguel's bitter, jealous subordinate, Aaron Delgado to sabotage the machine. Very little was known about what type of effect that might have on a human, so there was a good chance he'd just die. Just what they wanted. Aaron and Tyler's smug faces entered the lab, watching Miguel suffer and taunting him, even pouring up another round of bourbon while they waited for the show to end. Yep, he'd be dead in just a few more minutes. They had an alibi and a cover up ready to go. They'd post his job opening by Monday and then they could pretend like this never happened. Miguel suddenly became still, his chest seeming to freeze in place, no longer rising and falling with his normal breathes. 

Gabriella, my little girl...I'm so sorry....I love you more than anything 

His eyes became glassy with tears. He was on his way to finding happiness with you too, only to have the rug pulled out from under him, now he was going to die here, alone. And those who killed him would never know justice behind their corporate wall of privilege and greed that would surely protect them. He uttered your name, his lips barely moving before his eyes fell closed and saw only black.. 

----

Pt 4 coming soon! Thanks for the support 🖤

@mysteris-things

[misfitclassismyfreetherapy]

Yay, yummy new character. Also slight zezevine content.

I

v

.

He's still holding the damn fan even when working, how iconic.

The first panel made me laugh ngl.

But hey, at least Zeze had somewhat of a good manner in front of women. Still, lot of potential here. Those two being partners would be hilarious and also really fucking interesting.

I hope them both get more screentime because holy fuck, they are underrated af.

They looked amazing in the student council uniform btw, just wanted to point that out but alas is it a surprise that Nishi Osamu makes breathtaking designs of characters?

New. Character. YES.

.

She's so cute I love her already. Her character design is compelling, the showcase of her personality is pretty cute.

Also her and Iruma's army with the kouhais? FUCK YEAH, MORE FUCKING YUMMY FLUFF DYNAMICS LET'S FUCKING GOO.

I am so damn excited to see what's next. The arc is starting pretty nice so far in my opinion! I forgot to say this but-

.

My live reaction:

YES PRAISE HER M O R E.

Chima complimenting Silvia made my multishipper heart flutter. They are so adorable I swear to god. Yabashi, ( de-man guy ) is like the guy I want to see more in the story. He is so cute, seriously he went to Scary Bad Boy -> Cute Socially Awkward. It's so damn funny I can't-

Anyways besides all that, I hoped you somewhat enjoyed my rant of the recent chapters of Mairuma, I hope you have a good day or night guys, gals and non-binary pals!

[greetingfromthedead]

Happy Trigun Fanfiction Appreciation Week!

While I encourage all the fantastic creators of this community, I just wanted to promote some of my lovely moots and other friends! ❤

While this includes ficrecs, you should definitely go and check out all their other work too! If you're at all into x Reader, you'll find plenty of lovely stuff on their blogs!

@jellys-compendium

Masterlist

💜My Papa (~1k words)

💜 Raiting: Everyone

💜 Pairing: Dad!Vash x reader, but it's mostly Vash being adorable with his kids

💜 Summary: A Cozy Dad!Vash Drabble. Vash tries to teach his two rambunctious twins a new word.

💜 Review: It is so friggin' cute! Vash being a dad is so adorable and if that's not enough to entice you to go read it, idk what will! It also inspired me to write my own Dad!Vash fic so that's something!

❤️ Lovebug (7.9k words)

❤️ Raiting: Explicit

❤️ Pairing: Sinister!Vash x f!Reader

❤️ Summary: You've been running for a long time, miraculously evading the destructive storm on your heels. But one fateful night you find yourself trapped and unable to escape the humanoid typhoon any longer. He'll make you regret running from him.

❤️ Review: It is so dark and so hot. Sweet god, it's like a Finnish sauna. Check the tags, but oml, it had be reeling.

@triplesilverstar

Masterlist

💜 A kiss in the rain (~0.3k words, but part of a much larger and fantastic series)

💜 Raiting: Everyone

💜 Pairing: Vash x f!Reader

💜 Summary: A rare occurrence happens on the desert planet.

💜 Review: This is adorable! A quick fluffy pick-me-up, but you should check out the rest of the "Of Bandits, Bullets, Ghosts, & Typhoons" series too!!!

❤️ A so called God on a mountain top? Well, better then freezing to death (~3k words, but there's a part 2!)

❤️ Raiting: Explicit

❤️ Pairing: God!Vash x f!Reader

❤️ Summary: You had gone to the area to learn about the local wildlife and the fauna. Sure the villagers were wary of outsiders, but you honestly hadn't expected to be drugged and tied to a slab on the mountaintop in nothing but a flimsy robe. So when a handsome blond stranger shows up claiming to be a God who are you to argue?

❤️ Review: This God!AU is fantastic! The smut is hot AF and Vash has feathers! What more do you need? This will have you hot and bothered in no time. And if you're like me, it will rot your brain too and inspire you to ponder your own take on the God!AU, it's just that good.

@novasintheroom

Masterlist

💜 A home for you and me (0.9k words, but part of the 150 Bullets drabble series)

💜 Raiting: Everyone

💜 Pairing: Vash x gn!Reader

💜 Summary: It's a new chapter in your lives and you both have to get used to the concept of actually having a home.

💜 Review: This is so cute and wholesome!!! Reader having zoomies is absolutely a mood and Vash is also so cute! This series is filled with such adorable stories!

❤️ Memories (0.7k words, but is part of the 150 Bullets drabble series)

❤️ Raiting: Everyone

❤️ Pairing: Vash x gn!Reader

❤️ Summary: Vash is plagued by unpleasant memories, but good thing you're there to be a shoulder to lean on.

❤️ Review: A bit angsty, but also so fluffy and wholesome like it should be! It's a great read and seeing into Vash's head is always such a wonderful experience in stories like this!

@bendycxmet

Masterlist

💜 Sleep Date (~1.2k words)

💜 Raiting: Everyone

💜 Pairing: Vash x gn!Reader

💜 Summary: Most of your and Vash's dates consist of getting cozy beneath the covers.

💜 Review: Really cute and fluffy! Who wouldn't want to try and crawl into his skin? So cuddly and sweet!

❤️ Crowd (~1.5k words)

❤️ Raiting: Everyone

❤️ Pairing: Wolfwood x gn!Reader

❤️ Summary: You watch as Wolfwood tries to find you in a crowd.

❤️ Review: This had be giddy and it has so many lovely descriptions. Wolfwood doesn't get enough love, but this makes up for it! It's super cute!

@vashs-turtleneck

Mastelist

💜 Stay (~0.4k words)

💜 Raiting: Everyone

💜 Pairing: Vash x gn!Reader

💜 Summary: Waking up the morning after next to your favorite travel companion.

💜 Review: It's a touch angsty, but mostly just cute fluff! A good wholesome read! Vash is just as cute as ever in this one!

❤️ Sharing is Caring (3.1k words)

❤️ Raiting: Explicit

❤️ Pairing: Vash x f!Reader x Wolfwood

❤️ Summary: You, Vash, and Wolfwood have a bit of a wild evening together.

❤️ Review: This is absolutely delicious! this fic will stay with you for a while and put dirty thoughts in your head long after you've finished reading it. It is so god damn hot. I mean you get a threesome with Vash and Wolfwood. What else is there to say???

If you've scrolled this far: Thank you for your attention! Please, go check out these fantastic creators and also all the other stuff under the tag #trigunfanficappreciation! This is a fantastic community with so many talented creators and artists! I'm sure everyone will find something they enjoy here!

If you enjoy what creators put out, please please please, show them some love! Comment, reblog and like! It motivates your favorites to keep writing and creating art! Thank you!

Thank you @trigunfanfic / @beelzebby666 for this event! ❤❤❤

[chansbabygirlsstuff]

Just a bet.... Chapter 1

Boring, that's how I describe math class, the teacher shits on us for not remembering the formula for x or whatever she is blabbering about.

let me explain how college works for me, There are always groups of everything and clubs for anything, for example, the soccer majors, you know the leaders there are amazingly fit and all, all the girls there want them for their own, but that's not how it works in here then you have the dance majors  who are incredibly sexy because the way they move is so ugh.....and music majors hot af, science majors they are actually the funniest and smartest of all the uni, theater majors, dramatic af, psychology majors they only read your mind and always so nosy in whatever is going around because they are 'trying to understand whats going on in their heads so they can solve it ', law majors super gossips, and more, you know at the end it's a university and there is lots of stuff to study. 

My name is Y/n and I'm a law major currently in my 2nd year here, but I really don't have friends, just being around so many people is not a good influence all the time but people talk to me sometimes ( when they need something from you)  some girls in my major are amiable and cute so maybe they are not a bad influence.

"Y/n" Yuna screamed my name from across the class making people look at her and then at me, as she walked towards me with her friend group: Tzuyu, Mina, and Lia.

"hey girl you still up for studying in the library?" "Sure" you answered remembering that they invited you to study yesterday for a group project. you stand up and follow them out of the class to change your path to go to your locker, as you put your stuff away you hear loud laughs and teasing between a group of boys passing through the hallways behind you, the sassy, fun, amiable guys at the school, the popular Boys they are pretty chill but of course, they have there bad shit like hookups during the week with different girls and then leaving them heartbroken after

Seugmin is a baseball major he pretty cool ngl, then there is Lee Know a dance major, Felix in computer science major, Han, Chanbing, and Bang Chan are Music majors but they also studying something else Han is in a Scientific major and Chanbing is in Economics Chan is in Business and then there's  I.N who also studies law and Hyunjin who is in soccer major and Accounting.

"Y/nnnnnnn" Hyunjin comes running toward me with a cute smile and a wobbly run and grabs me from my shoulders moving me side to side as I almost lose balance "What do you want Hwang?" I said annoyed because he only talks to me to annoy me or ask me for something, like last time...

Flashback* 

"Y/nnnnnn," he says screaming from the end of the hallway as I turn to him and say, "What Hwang?" I looked dead into his eyes "Oh don't be mean to me you love me" he said dramatically" " I just wanted to borrow 20 bucks please" he begged "For what?" he stayed silent and said "Well I bet Han that he couldn't fit his whole hand in his mouth and he did it but now it's stuck so Lee know is taking to the hospital, but now I owe that dumb fuck 20 bucks and I didn't bring cash with me, so please have mercy with this beautiful soul in front of you"he pouted his lips and gave the puppy eys as he almost kneeled down "fine! you better give them back tomorrow or you dead meat" I warned him as he left smiling and blowing a kiss at me jokingly 

End of Flashback*

"So... I bet I.N to do karaoke night yesterday at his house and I would've done his statistics homework but now I'm too tired to do it and it has Law examples, you and he study that so can I please copy yours for him" he pouted his lips as I sighed and open my locker to give him my notebook "thank you so much I owe you so much girl," he said screaming and running towards his next class as I got to mine.

12:05 pm 

it was lunchtime time so I went out to a cafe to get myself caffeine for the rest of the day and a chicken sandwich "That will be 14.99" the cashier said to me as I opened my wallet to get my card "I'll pay for that" a man next to me swiped his card for my order before I could even say anything "ok perfect please wait on the line and your stuff will be here soon" the girl said with a smile and left.

the man looked at me and smiled "Chan?" I asked confused as to why he was there and why he paid for my order "Hey, what up?" he said casually as he leaned against the table  "Can I get the same please?" he said to the cashier as he paid his stuff, "umm why did you pay for my things? I was going to do it" I told him while he smiled and told me "You Hyujins friend right? Y/n?"

I looked at him suspiciously and said "Yes and no I'm not giving homework for free" "Technically is not free, I just paid for your meal, but I'm not here for any favours no worries" He said as we took a seat in one of the tables, I ate my food feeling weird cause wtf do he want now? " so is there anything you need?" I said and he looked taken back at my comment that yeah... it was kinda rude.

"no nothing I just saw you were a good friend of Hyunjin's and you seem like a fun friend to have around, so I wanted to be friends with you too," he says smiling at me as I looked confused at him "Plus you're cute," he says with a little smirk appearing in his face "No seriously what do you need?" I said a bit annoyed by his comment and he just chuckled "Nothing relax I just want to be friends, as I said you look like a fun girl" he said as we continued eating, and then before I was finished someone entered the cafe "Chan my man" they fist bombed as the other male sits " hi in Han, your Hyujins friend right?" "OK, what does Hyunjin need now? cause this is weird"

"what do you mean? can we just talk to you?" Han said as he looked offended by my feistiness, I put my head down in shame but you can't trust these guys, they are always up to no good, as I tried to finish my food and just replied to their questions and small talk I got up and picked my stuff "ok I need to go, class is going to start soon, it was nice meeting you all" "let me take you to class" Chan said as he got up to accompany me but I stopped him before anything else "oh you don't have to don't worry I have to go to the library to study anyways" "I was heading there, lets study together" he said keeping up with me as I walked " I have a project with the girls so you will be stuck listening to us, so if your planning to pay attention to what your studying then I recommend to study in another table, they can be loud sometimes" " no worries I would like to learn what you know" he smiles as he follows me, why is he acting as he knew me since forever? doesn't he know that he looks like a creep who is about to kidnap a 23 female or what?.

[prince-liest]

Thank you to that anon who mentioned that the last 666 fic changed, cuz otherwise I woulda NEVER known. I know it could potentially be annoying af, but in cases like this a 'yo this fic was edited' ao3 email option could be helpful lol

Anyways, omgggg the changes you made were SO cute. Hell yeah snuggle time! I can't even tell if Vox would be a nice person to snuggle with. On the one side, big ass flat screen tv head. On the other, body-sized electric warmer. Also, I love Alastor saying yes to a hug, even despite that bigass exasperation sigh. The hug might've been a little bit more for himself than he realized, considering he didn't go 'well this kinda sucks but at least vox is being pathetic about it.' Nah nah, automatically likens it to someone HE usually does the supporting for, and figures this is what they feel like, I love it so much

I debated about that to myself for so long, haaa - sorry that you missed it at first!! Honestly, my plan is also to mention it in an AN in the next 666 fic at this point! I feel kinda bad functionally sending out a mass email by posting a chapter and then deleting it! That way people who sub to the series and such will still get notified, even if it's later. I do wish we had an update option other than "post chapter and then delete chapter" or something. Would also be helpful for folks who do full rewrites and other such things!

Anyway, aw, I'm really glad you enjoyed it! I'm a "Vox is a bag of sharp corners and elbows" truther, LOL, but Alastor is NO better at all and in fact frequently uses his sharp corners (antlers) to be annoying on purpose, so, y'know. Karma or whatever.

The hug was definitely needed for him. Sorry, Alastor, you're still a human being with stress responses and socialization instincts underneath all the cannibalism and dark magics, and your thoughts and actions are telling on you. Get cared for, idiot.

[tervaneula]

Now that we're entering into 2024, I'm asking some artists and writers that I follow:

1) What is the one piece you're most proud of from this past year?

2) What are some pieces that you would have liked more people to see? If you can include links, I'd love to go check them out!

3) What were your top three favorite pieces (art, comics, fics, etc) that someone else has made this past year?

(As always, no pressure to respond! Feel free to just ignore, or let me know if you'd rather I not send you these kinds of asks in the future.)

Ooooh my goodness this is so fun, thank you for sending this! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!<3<3<3

1 Oh gosh, I'm so sorry but I cannot choose because it's definitely a tie between make your home in me and world's end boyfriend.

The first one because I hadn't written smut in literal years but writing it felt so flowy and nice still, I loved showcasing Leonardo and Yuichi's fondness for each other and including all the funny bits!!!

The second one because it's the longest oneshot I've written so far and I'm so proud of all the little details and ESPECIALLY the interactions between the turtle fam. Leo and Leonardo's relationship is secondary to the plot but I just love their interactions in it SO MUCH.

2 The fic breathe (and let go) flew under the radar, idk why. It's wholesome af, as is my brand u_u

My turtlesona!! She's CUTE

This meme redraw. It's still hilarious to me

The leoichi meet-cute fic - I'll always remember how freaking giddy I was while writing it but... it's still missing the second chapter (y'all it's the next WIP I'm gonna finish!!!!)

3 THIS AU by @witchofthemoss AARRARARARSHJDFG

THIS THIS THIS by @mushangaa because ohhhh my god

This fic by @beeceit I'm so soft over it FOREVER ;;_;;

And honorary mention for @amevello-blue's Ghost as a character because that old man squeezes my heart every time I think about him

[sparkle-d]

waiting game | daniel ricciardo

pairing: daniel ricciardo x you

summary: in which you switch your phone with daniel's without knowing

tags: falling in love; chatting and messages; kind of enemies to friends to lovers

warnings: insecure reader; f!reader; dumb people

chapter: 5/?

(you: blue/ daniel: orange)

✧.* tag list: @bloodyvalentine93 @organasith @verstappens-hat @idkiwantchocolatee @landhoe @theplobnrgone @iamasimpingh0e @chiliwhore @buendiabebeta @icecoldtiress @holy-macncheese-balls @caosfanblr @cxliforniadream @calmleclerc @hannahholland1811 @dr3lover @charlewiss @moneymasnn

chapter 5 - dearly

hot stuff said: my morning is way better after i message you

hot stuff said: my team just made the worst coffee i’ve ever had the unpleasure to put on my tastebuds 

hot stuff said: only talking to you can save the bitter humor i’m feeling right now

ma fraise said: i’m sorry about the coffee hahah

ma fraise said: i drink way too much coffee 

ma fraise said: so one day

ma fraise said: (not now or any time soon)

ma fraise said: i can make you the perfect mug of coffee to brighten up your day

hot stuff said: damn it

hot stuff said: you sound like we are only gonna meet when we are already in our fifties  and living in new york

hot stuff said: then we will run into each other by coincidence 

hot stuff said: but i accept your offer

hot stuff said: when the time comes i hope i can taste your delicious coffee

hot stuff said: and i can make you muffins

hot stuff said: or cupcakes if you like that nasty frosting on top of it

ma fraise said: maybe that’s how it’s meant to be

ma fraise said: for us to meet in new york and drink coffee with muffins

ma fraise said: i like the frosting because i like sweet things

ma fraise said: but muffins are fine too

ma fraise said: whatever you think you do best

hot stuff said: i’ll note that

hot stuff said: when the time comes

hot stuff said: don’t make me forget about it

hot stuff said: this talk is making me hungry af

hot stuff said: oh to eat a slice of bread right now

ma fraise said: you don’t have bread?

ma fraise said: bad coffee and now no bread to eat in the morning

ma fraise said: i’m eating bread with strawberry gem right now

ma fraise said: i could leave a slice on your team’s door

ma fraise said: dksjsjdf

hot stuff said:: probably this isn’t a good option

hot stuff said: i would try to take a sneak peek of you if you decided to leave bread to me

ma fraise said: well weren’t you the mister “you-can-trust-me-with-anything” 

hot stuff said: you can trust

hot stuff said: but i’m a curious person and i can’t change that

hot stuff said: maybe i could but i don’t know where to start

hot stuff said: but anyways 

hot stuff said: i think i’ll go to a cafeteria and grab something there

hot stuff said: talk to you later, ma fraise :)

You have had a hell of a day. It’s probably your fault for not sleeping a good amount of hours last night, leading you to be tired the next whole day. You can feel a headache starting to grow around your temples and there’s nothing you want more than taking a shower and going to bed. 

But you still have three full laps to watch before the racing ends. You wouldn’t say you totally hate these three last laps, but you’re certainly not in the day to endure a race so long as this one, pay too much attention and debate topics by the end of it.

At least you have Charles to cheer the too-tired you during the meetings.

“Don’t worry about the meeting, you’re the best engineer I know.” Charles hugs you “You know, it amazes me sometimes, you’re so good at what you do.”

You sigh “I needed to be good at something, right? At least my brain still works properly.” 

Charles lightly punches you in your rib area “Stop saying that, you’re not only a smart ass, but a cute face too.”

The comment Charles makes automatically has a reaction in you and you grimace at your best friend.

“Not in a flirty way, okay?” Charles giggles at himself, knowing you would never even consider that type of compliment as some kind of flirt coming from Charles.

“Thanks for clearing that matter up for me, I thought I would need to tell you you’re not my type.” You, even if you are tired, can give a small smile to your friend. Charles always knows how to bring joy to your time together.

—

You feel like running away. But Piere is already talking to his friends and introducing you to the group.

“Ok, these are Mick and Oscar.” You give a small wave in their direction and they greet him too.

There’s no way you will socialize with these people. 

With this kind of thought surrounding your head, it becomes very difficult for you to focus on anything else than the fact that you can’t be on their level. Mick is very elegant, his glasses perfectly fit the frame of his face and the bridge of his nose. His hair is silk and so shiny, in a good way. Oscar is definitely a sportist, with broad shoulders, very strong arms and he’s with a lollipop moving inside his mouth from side to side. And with them are faces that you’re more familiar with. Carlos and Lewis are way too pretty for their own good. Carlos is from your team, but you only see him sometimes, never interacted with him outside of the garage. He has beautiful lips and a mesmerizing smile. Lewis’ skin seems to glow under the light, golden and healthy. He’s the most intimidating one for you.

But you… you are bland. You’re normally wearing Ferrari’s sweatshirts, your hair isn’t the nicest - especially because you don't do anything to it. The bags under your eyes are looking darker because you didn’t have enough sleep. You know you’re not good looking, you know it very well.

Pierre and Charles fit nicely with them, but they fit in with everyone. There’s nothing difficult about it to them.

You’re in the diner of the hotel, having dinner and the boys are deciding where they will go to celebrate the race. The mood is good and you’re in the middle of them after Charles and Pierre dragged you there with them. You think you will get used to these drivers one day, but it’s the opposite, it’s always a reminder that you’re in the middle of famous and gorgeous drivers.

“Staring at them this hard won’t make you read their minds, if that’s your intention.” Daniel gets closer to you, with a little smirk. He takes a seat next to you, bringing his burger with him “Actually, Lando has an empty head, so it’s easier to know what is going inside there, you might have a shot.”

Lando is frowning at the menu on his hand. He has a lollipop too and he’s pointing to the lines he’s reading with his finger. He looks confused.

Daniel continues, “George, help me pick my drink.” Daniel mocks the way he said the words, letting a whine get through his voice.

Lando sighs, “George, help me pick my drink.” 

Daniel laughs when his friend says exactly what he imagined. You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes from it. You’re amazed at how much Daniel knows about his friend, to even know what he will say eventually. That’s something you will only develop if you pay a lot of attention to the people surrounding you. Daniel is a very observative person then, you think.

Is he already studying you and how you act around other people? Will he guess what you are thinking or what you have to say?

Stop thinking about it, then.

You sense when Daniel leans in your direction again, making your faces get closer and you blink a couple of times, adjusting to the sudden approach.

“You should come too.” Daniel isn’t actually smirking, but you can see a trace of a smirk starting to show around his lips. Daniel is whispering, making sure your conversation isn’t being heard by the others “It will be fun.”

You are quiet for a second, not very sure if you’re supposed to just deny it, or think about an excuse to tell Daniel. You never had to think about it, with Pierre it is a simple no, but Pierre knew how you were, he wouldn’t be offended by it.

“Clubs aren’t exactly my favorites.” You start saying, whispering back at Daniel.

Daniel studies your face for a moment and twists the tip of his nose “Have you ever gone to a club with us before?”

“No.” You simply say.

Of course you’ve been to clubs once in a while, you’re Pierre’s best friend after all. But you preferred to avoid it, clubs are too crowded and small for your liking. There’s something different about the lights, the air, the people. You enjoyed a lot more other types of socialization.

“Then how would you know it’s not your thing? We are good company.” 

Because I just know, you think.

But you can’t say that, not to Daniel. You had a couple of debates with Daniel before, you can’t exactly guarantee to Daniel that you don't like something, if you’ve never done it before. That’s a debate you will lose for sure, so you won’t start it.

“I know… It sounds boring when you think about what kind of public attends the after parties, but I can assure you we won’t get closer to them.” 

That’s not what bothers and scares you, actually, but explaining it to Daniel would be necessary to go too deep in a matter you can’t discuss with someone you’re not even friends with.

“You and your friends look like the kind of public that attends the clubs, so I have no idea what that means, actually.” You shrug.

Daniel raises both his eyebrows, a small smile forming around his lips, “Do we?”

“If I set a celebrity stereotypical beauty and standards, then yes, you do.” You try not to sound so boring, even if you think everything you’ve said is boring.

Daniel smirks and leans even closer to you “Did you just say you think I’m handsome?” Daniel laughs softly “Or maybe attractive?”

You get flustered and you can hear a gasp escaping your lips. You look away from Daniel’s eyes, trying to not blush with his proximity and Daniel assuming you think he’s handsome. He is. But Daniel doesn’t need to know it.

You try to control the things inside your body and look at Daniel again, who is still intensely staring at you, or you think it’s an intense stare because you’re not used to stares normally.

“I could say you just pass the standard bar, but your friends make up for you, I guess.” You manage to say it and Daniel seems to have even more fun.

“So… you think they are way more handsome than me…” Daniel starts “Who’s your top tier, then? Now I wanna know.”

Now you make sure to not look at anyone else but deep in Daniel’s eyes. You can’t look around and give any wrong ideas to Daniel. Actually, you can’t come to a good motive in your head for Daniel to want to know who is the most attractive in your opinion in the room. Daniel’s stare is piercing you, really invested in knowing your answer to his question, even if you don't have an answer for it - you weren't thinking about that and you still aren't.

Appearance is not something you notice at first, at least not in others.

“Ermmm…” Lando makes a loud noise with his throat in your and Daniel’s direction, and both of you look at him “Okay, thank you for finally giving me your attention.”

You didn’t know, but you can feel even more embarrassed than before, because everyone is eyeing you and Daniel. They gathered around your table to talk, but you were closed in your little world with Daniel. Everyone spotted your small conversation and how close you were. 

Daniel seems okay with the situation, probably used to it especially with his friends, but all of it is new to you. You’re  not used to getting everyone’s attention, even if it’s only a few people.

Lando continues “As I was saying, we should eat and then go, everyone agrees?”

One by one, all of them agree with it, even moody Charles said he will meet them at the club. There's silence and all the heads turn in your direction again, you being the only one that didn’t agree or say anything at all. You play with your fingers and can’t decide if you should say something or not, you might stutter if you try to open your mouth.

You are so bad with these things, and when everyone can notice you’re terrible with social interactions it makes you uneasy. People acknowledging your struggles is not something you enjoy on a daily basis.

“She will be there too.” Pierre finally says, getting up from his seat and going in your direction, side hugging his best friend “You won’t miss tonight’s party, it will be your first this season!”

Then the conversation turns into how you didn’t go to other parties that year, as expected. You can’t exactly tell when, but you are just watching them talking about it, your brain isn’t focusing on the words, nor if one of them is talking to you at the moment. You can only think about how you will completely disappear from everyone’s sight until ten p.m.

—

You didn’t have the opportunity to disappear from Pierre’s sight that night, because Pierre was stuck to your side all the time, probably already knowing you would try to escape from him any time soon. Pierre even went to your room to get changed.

The club is near the hotel, so you can walk there. It’s only a couple of blocks until you can already hear the music playing.

Drinks, ice and empty bottles were next to the rest of the group when you and Pierre arrived at the club. You managed to greet all of them, even Daniel with his cold bottle of beer touching the nape of your neck.

You are panicking inside, but trying to hold it in the best he can. There’s so many people there, you had only been to such crowded places in your life a few times, and under the circumstances you were really obligated to go, like work. But there it wasn’t only crowded, it was filled with young adults, with too many hormones bottled up inside of them, and that’s the least type of people you want to have connections with. 

You can hold it back for a couple of hours, and when the opportunity appears, when Pierre is too busy dancing with his friends, you slide away from the crowd, the club, from Pierre and his too-pretty-for-nothing friends. 

It’s the first time you notice how chilly it is that night. Until that moment, you were so nervous your body was almost feverish. Now, the wind is blowing against your face and you can feel the cold breeze around your body and enjoy it a little.

You walk away from the club, but you don't know where you’re going. You don't want to go to your hotel room because that will be the first place Pierre and Charles will search for you when they notice you are missing, and you don't want to deal with it right now. 

You take your cell phone from your pocket and unlock it.

ma fraise said: are you there

ma fraise said: i’m alone in an unknown event right now and feeling sad

hot stuff said:  right now??? alone??

hot stuff said: it’s not very safe you know

hot stuff said: maybe you should call a friend

hot stuff said: i was about to say me because i’m free

hot stuff said: but we can’t meet

hot stuff said: so ~another~ friend

You stop for a second.

ma fraise said: would you come if i asked?

hot stuff said: well… sure

hot stuff said: but only if you wanted some company too

hot stuff said: i don't like bothering others

hot stuff said: i’m just very protective sometimes

hot stuff said: skdjfng

You smile.

ma fraise said: i want to be a little alone at the moment

ma fraise said: but if the situation was different i would gladly enjoy your company

ma fraise said: it wouldn’t be a bother at all

hot stuff said: may i ask you why you want to be alone at the moment

hot stuff said: if it’s a personal matter i get it

ma fraise said: it’s complicated

hot stuff said: it always is ksdjnf

ma fraise said: well for me is very simple but if i tell you 

ma fraise said: you might not understand it fully

hot stuff said: try me

You bite your lip, thinking of a not so weird way to tell what you’re feeling.

ma fraise said: i’m not very used to social events 

ma fraise said: being around too many people makes me panic sometimes

ma fraise said: because i don’t like when people look at me 

ma fraise said: and in crowded places people will probably look at me 

ma fraise said: and this night my friend made me attend an event with him

ma fraise said: it’s overwhelming

ma fraise said: too overwhelming actually

ma fraise said: now i just want to breath slowly until my heart goes back to its normal beat race

hot stuff said: that’s very normal, ma fraise

hot stuff said: i understand what you mean and i’m sorry you were in this situation today

hot stuff said: but...

hot stuff said: if he’s your friend why did he make you do something he obviously knows you don’t feel comfortable doing?

hot stuff said: uncomfortable is the least, you said you were panicking during it 

hot stuff said: that’s not very cool

ma fraise said: he wants to help me

ma fraise said: in his very extroverted way of doing things, i think

ma fraise said: he wants me to enjoy the things he enjoys

ma fraise said: he knows i want to let this fear go and he thinks this is the right way of doing it.

ma fraise said: in some ways, it might be i guess. i need to face the fear and notice how this is a

ma fraise said: whole twisted concept i created inside of my head

ma fraise said: i’m not mad at him for trying to help me with it

ma fraise said: i think i should be mad at myself that this was a complete failure

hot stuff said: it wasn’t a failure

hot stuff said: you went there, right?

hot stuff said: you said you NEVER do this, so it’s normal that the first time it will be a little more difficult

hot stuff said: sorry for judging your friend like that i just thought he dragged you there without asking you

ma fraise said: that’s almost what he did skjdfng

ma fraise said: but i know he means no harm

ma fraise said: especially to me

ma fraise said: he’s one of the only people i learned to trust like this

hot stuff said: if i can help you

hot stuff said: when you try to face your fear again

hot stuff said: you can message me 

hot stuff said: if i’m here

hot stuff said: i’ll send you a cheering message to you to give some courage

hot stuff said: what you think?

ma fraise said: i would really enjoy it

ma fraise said: would really help

You wait a little longer, but it seems like hot stuff won’t answer your message any time soon. Near the club you notice there’s a McDonald’s open. That’s better than being outside alone in the dark - and there’s a place where you can sit comfortably and maybe even take a nap after such a draining and exhausting day. You choose a seat, where you can rest your legs too and watch the midnight McDonald’s lovers come and go.

ma fraise said: thank you for listening to me

ma fraise said: it means a lot

ma fraise said: i hope we continue talking, for a long time 

ma fraise said: i really like you, hot stuff

—

You feel suffocated inside the diner, the air is not circulating too much in there, so you decide to leave. That’s the problem when you don’t interact much with other people - you always get anxious with the minimal things, even if it’s something related to someone you don’t even know who they are in real life.

Hot stuff hasn't answered yet and after reading your own messages too many times, you can’t look at your phone anymore.

You shouldn’t have sent those messages, you aren’t close enough for you to say anything like that, especially that you like him. You opened up, a little, with him at your own risk - because you, out of free will, wanted to do that.  That doesn’t mean anything. You take a deep breath, and try to put some sense into your mind. Hot stuff has never been rude to you, or treated you in a bad way, there’s no reason for him to act any differently in this situation.

If hot stuff said he liked you, you wouldn’t be mad at him about saying it.

Don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic.

You take another deep breath, deciding to go out a bit, for some fresh air.

You look up to the sky, it’s mostly clear, only a few clouds dancing around with the wind. “Oh, Pegasus.” You can see the constellation above you, recognizing it a couple of minutes later. The lights around the city are so faint, you could see the stars perfectly above you.

It’s peaceful for a moment and you can feel your heart calming down. Your breathing is going back to normal and your body doesn’t feel as tense as before. You are taking control of your own again and your mind is quiet for once that day. Even if you like to be alone most of the time, you wish you could share this moment with someone, the very rare kind of moment where you aren't worrying about your surroundings.

The only things watching you are the stars and they are shining brightly to you that night. You go back inside the McDonald's, deciding to order a chocolate milkshake. By now, you should’ve messaged your friends about where you are, but you totally forgot about it. They aren’t your parents, you shouldn’t tell them every step of yours anyways.

“Hey!” You hear a voice shouting from somewhere near you. The door closes and you're not alone anymore with the employees of the McDonald's, it seems like someone has found you already. When you notice who is calling for you, you almost roll your eyes “I finally found you.”

Daniel is walking in a funny way, his legs too loose for a walk and you could easily imagine him tripping on his own foot and falling to the ground. 

“You’re very bad at looking for things then, I wasn’t even hiding.” You say, convincing yourself it wasn’t a lie - but it wasn’t the truth either. Your milkshake is already gone, so you go up to throw it in the trash.

Daniel smirks.

“Actually, all of us were looking for you.” Now that Daniel is closer to you, you could see that Daniel’s eyes are lazyly open, his ears are bright red, and from the smell of his breath, it indicates he had more than just a couple of beers “Everyone freaked out when we noticed you disappeared.” 

You try to gulp a bitter feeling you always get when you notice how much people miss you. You have been gone for hours, maybe. The party probably already ended a while ago, but only now they decided to search for you. You don't have an outstanding presence and you know it, but you’re pretty sure if it was any other in his place, things would’ve happened way faster.

When you let this feeling fade away, you start to think that all of them were looking for you around. It was not Pierre and Charles alone, losing every strand of their hair because you decided to play hide and seek, but everyone tried to help them find their reckless and weird best friend on a sunday night.

“I decided to go for a walk.” You justify yourself, not admitting you ran away to be alone and drink a milkshake in an empty McDonald’s “I didn’t notice I was gone for so long.” 

Daniel’s body is acting weird and you found it amusing how much booze could make a person change. You’ve seen him drunk before, but you like to spot the differences. Daniel wasn’t the most composed person, but he gave the very in control aura to others - he looked like he owned things even when he wasn’t in control of it. You thought that it was very different from yourself, even sober you can hardly control all the emotions inside of you. 

The smell of beer and sweat are very present in Daniel, but you could still sense a hint of cologne on him. Since the beginning of the party, you didn’t have the opportunity to be around Daniel too much, now being the first time that night you’re side by side with said boy.

You like Daniel's smell, but you can’t recognize for sure the mixture of smells from his perfume.

The two of you leave the McDonald’s, going back to the streets. 

“I’ll call Charles and tell him I found you…” Daniel hiccups, his fingers not responding to the actions he wants them to do. He types on his phone very slowly, bringing it closer to his face so he can see better. “Oh wait, that’s definitely not Charles.”

Daniel tries to cancel the call, his phone trembling on his hands as he tries to act way faster than he should in his condition. That makes you giggle a bit, you wonder who Daniel was calling instead of Charles, maybe someone he wasn’t supposed to call at all… Some girl?

“So I managed to make you finally laugh?” Daniel stops what he’s doing on his phone and looks up at you, you don't even try to hide that you found it funny how clumsy Daniel was acting, but the giggles turned into a fade smile.

Whoever Daniel is calling, answers and he immediately puts the phone against his ear “H-Hi mom!” Daniel clears his throat and even straightens his posture. You watch him have a very awkward call with his mom “Yeah, I’m so sorry, I know it’s way too late for me to call you, but… But I missed you.”

You can hear Daniel’s mom from the other side repeating that she’s missing him too. Even if it’s only a faded voice in a phone call, you can imagine how happy she is. Maybe Daniel really knows how to be heartwarming with others, and how caring he can be with the ones he cherishes the most.

You are probably thinking way too much into this, especially with a person you only hung out a couple of times.

“Yes, mom, I love you too!” Daniel tries to finish the call “Love you to the moon and back.” He has a small smile when he looks at his phone screen, ending the call “It’s so difficult to sound sober to your parents when you’re anything, but sober.”

Daniel’s voice goes back to the same tone from before, and you feel like laughing again, but this time you manage to control yourself.

“Let me help you help me find Charles again.” You say, taking your phone out of your pocket “I think I’m in a better condition to use my cell phone and will actually manage to call Charles.”

You haven’t touched your phone since you arrived, when you were too nervous because of what you sent to hot stuff. When your phone screen lightens up in front of your eyes, the first thing you see are Pierre’s and Charles’ messages to you and many calls from your best friends.

But your eyes go to a couple of messages below the calls and messages. As soon as you read the messages, your face turns red instatelly. You feel your heart pounding harder against your ribcage and you gasp.

Daniel notices the flustered look in your face “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

Before Daniel can have the chance to have a glance at your phone screen, you hug your phone against your chest, hiding the messages from Daniel’s eyes “My… My battery is dying, can I borrow your phone? I can call Charles from it.”

You don't let your phone go even when you’re calling Charles from Daniel’s phone. You speak a few words with your best friend, your voice sounding more like a whisper, but Charles seems to be used to it by now. Daniel is leaning against one of the buildings’ walls, waiting for you to finish your call with Charles, trying his best to sober up. 

He’s not even that close to you anymore, but he notices that you are still almost hugging your phone, holding it so tight that the knuckles in your hand are turning white with the pressure around the lilac phone case you’re using. Daniel can see how startled you are, your breath is not even as it was a moment ago. You are restless, your legs not stopping for a second in the same place.

“Charles said they will be waiting at my room’s door.” You didn’t want to see any other than Pierre and Charles.

“Please, show me the way then.” Daniel gets closer to you again, now having more control over his members - his legs don’t seem like jelly anymore. At least, not that much.

You start walking on the sidewalks, the hotel isn’t far from where you are, but it’s definitely way too far for you. Your head isn’t in your walk with Daniel, or in anything around you at all. You can only think about those messages, and everytime you remember the words from it, your face gets warm with the thought. 

“You didn’t catch a cold, right?” Daniel stares at you too close, looking directly into your eyes. You have to make sure you don't trip or get more flustered with Daniel’s proximity, you already have too much going on inside of you at the moment “Your face and ears are soooooo red right now. Is it maybe a fever?”

Daniel touches your forehead, his hands gently caressing the sides of your face. You make sure to slap his hand away from your face, feeling something weird happen inside your stomach “I’m not sick or with a fever, stop.”

“You’re so hot, are you sure you’re okay?” Daniel continues and you start to walk faster “Maybe I could borrow you my jacket.”

When you look at Daniel, he is trying to take off his jacket and walk at the same time, still being a little drunk. The result is that Daniel is almost shirtless, bringing his shirt off with his jacket. You try to stop him with your hand, but accidentally rub your palms for a second against Daniel’s warm and soft skin. Your hand seems as if you touched fire with your fingertips and you quickly bring your hand back to the side of your body.

“Daniel, I mean it. There’s no need for you to give me your jacket. I’m not sick.” You use a serious tone when saying this to Daniel, and Daniel stops trying to get off his jacket and continues walking normally “But thank you for offering.”

Daniel just nods, leaving the silence to grow between you. You wish he would continue to talk or do something to maintain you with your head full, because your mind went back to the point where it was before and your heart is pounding hard once again.

Pierre and Charles are waiting for you in front of your room. 

“You!” Charles almost screams. You feel like a small kid that ran away from her house, worrying her older siblings until they found her in the park next to their house “Jesus, where have you been?” 

You feel embarrassed, because you didn’t imagine you would make Charles this worried about you “I was… eating something and lost track of time, I guess.” 

Charles sighs, but he and Pierre hug you very tight, rubbing your back, as if they’re trying to comfort you.

“I’m sorry for making you go with us, I know you don’t like these places.” Pierre whispers to you with a way too drunk voice “But when you want to leave, please, tell me and I will go with you. I got so nervous because you weren’t answering your phone.”

You can’t say anything else, you want to tell Pierre he doesn’t need to worry this bad about you, but you think that if you were in Pierre’s position, you would’ve gone insane in a couple of minutes.

“Now that you are safe, I will help these ones.” Charles looks at Pierre and Daniel. None of them seem to be sober yet. Charles isn’t too, but he seems to be the least drunk amongst them.

Pierre is shirtless, but Daniel doesn’t offer him his jacket.

“Excuse me sir, I can completely walk alone.” Pierre says, slapping Charles’ hands away “See?”

Pierre says it before losing his balance, but managing to stay on his feet.

“Is it okay if I help Charles l with him?” Daniel asks you “He will surely need some help, I think.”

“Sure.” You don't mind being alone, actually you prefer this way. You’re feeling way too strange about this situation, you want to show them you can take care of yourself alone. You aren't dependent.

You aren’t weak.

They leave together, laughing as the legs start to tangle on each other. You try to imagine yourself in between them, like that. Drunk, happy and having fun with your friends. For some reason, you don't seem to fit in.

You seem better where you are standing in that moment, only watching them from afar.

hot stuff said: ma fraise, i like you dearly too

hot stuff said: with all my heart

hot stuff said: hey i was wondering 

hot stuff said: i know it’s not your thing, but do you wanna come to a party?

hot stuff said: it’s a halloween party

hot stuff said: so i won’t know who you are

hot stuff said: it’s safe for us me thinks

hot stuff said: but only if you’re comfortable with it

[not-poignant]

I hope you have a lovely day with lots of snacks

Tl;dr the day was not lovely but there might be snacks

I actually didn't have many snacks today but I'm about to make up with it with a couple of churros and dark chocolate dipped strawberries.

Today I...woke up and showered and replied to comments on AO3 for a while, and then I spent about 4 hours formatting documents into PDFs of varying sizes for Patreon and Ream and uploading chapter commentaries into compilations. And then I did more formatting stuff behind the scenes while I stared at all the other behind the scenes stuff I need to do and thought 'writing is a hard job' quietly and intensely.

I ate lunch while I was working. I also made some memes about how overwhelmed I felt, and then made some for my readers too, lol.

And then I laid down for about 4 hours because I also have chronic illness (whee) and I am constantly in pain and varying degrees of fatigue and I literally must lie down every afternoon so I don't collapse in the evening (literally) - and I did a tiny bit of reading (webtoon: Shutline (which I immediately realised I'd read before and didn't fondly remember), webtoon: December (didn't mind this)) and then dozed restlessly because it was 40C/104F today. I also edited a Tiktok art video in Adobe Premier Rush, but I haven't put it up yet, and I should really do that.

Got up and made ham and cucumber sandwiches for dinner, and watched Girl with the Dogs on YouTube while I ate, and a Smosh video.

Then did some more work and helped a friend with her work stuff, and then I watered the garden for 1.5 hours because *points tiredly to the heatwave* and stared balefully at the dark sky (you can't water during the day - it's literally a heatwave but also it's illegal here to water during the day) with its few stars because they'd set up a severe weather warning due to extreme winds in our specific area and it was dead AF and oppressive out there and it was just hot instead.

I watched a few Tiktoks while I watered.

When I hung the hose up back on the holder thingo, I sang to my plants: 'I hope you make the best out of the water I just gave you, you little fucks' like a sweet lullaby, and a person who I didn't know was outside next door because it was like 9pm and pitch black laughed softly and sweetly, like they didn't expect it, and felt kind of fond. I didn't know I had any nice neighbours on that side of the house, so I mostly just thought 'WHOOPS SHIT' and then felt too embarrassed to say anything.

And then I came back inside and replied to some asks (hi!) and am hopefully going to eat churro's soon and it's 10pm and so I'm probably going to do some more work and then I'm going to go to bed while I feel stressed about the work I haven't done (currently Palmarosa is the heart beating beneath my floorboards). I will probably keep reading December. It's okayish.

I don't know if I'd call today lovely, because I'm burnt out and I want to put up the Christmas decorations but it's 10pm and idk if I should start that because it tends to make me severely ill to do it for a few days.

I'm a little sad, a lot lonely, a little melancholic, a little grumpy, and a little very excited about churros and chocolate dipped strawberries. I resent days that are 'work and sleep' sometimes, especially during November. That's my fault. That's on me. I'm a mean and shitty boss to myself.

Gotta do something about this burnout at some point, because December is the worst month for my PTSD, but I also need to keep getting paid, because medical bills and food and stuff. So like...finding the balance there is a constant work in progress.

There were some lovely moments today:

That little laugh from the neighbour in the dark

The first yellow peach of the season

Doing tricks with my cat (who is trained) for treats

Making silly little memes

Helping a friend with work stuff

Replying to some amazing comments

Watching cute dogs

Feeling pretty accomplished at putting up those compilations on Patreon/Ream even if I'm not done yet.

I hope you're having a lovely day too, anon, with many snacks.

[all-the-things-2020]

Late Night Talking - Chapter Ten

Summary: The aftermath of the movie premiere.

Word Count: 3150+

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: mentions of parent death, issues with body image

Tag list: @rhoorl @avastrasposts @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @gwendibleywrites

We slept late the next morning. It was after nine when I crawled out of bed to use the bathroom. Dieter was still passed out cold, lying face down with his face crammed into a pillow, his bare ass poking out from under the covers. I took a look at myself in the mirror and wished I hadn’t. My hair was sticking up in all directions and there were bags under my eyes. It was a far cry from my red carpet look.

I decided to take a shower and start over with my hair, rather than try to tame it the way it was. When I got out, I slipped into a pair of leggings and a t-shirt, deciding to forgo a bra, at least for the time being. It was going to be a lazy day, after all.

Dieter was still asleep. I leaned over the bed to cover him up and he grunted. “Why are you so obsessed with my butt?,” he mumbled.

”I’m not obsessed with your butt,” I told him. “I just didn’t want it to catch cold.” I tucked the comforter around him and patted his bottom. “Go back to sleep, Deet. You’ve earned it.”

”What time?”

”Doesn’t matter. Go to sleep.”

He didn’t argue with me. I knew the press junket had been stressful and tiring. He deserved to get some rest. 

I found my purse in the living room and pulled out my phone. I’d managed to remember to turn it off last night, so the battery was still at 65% when I powered it on. All my apps were lit up with notifications, but I went first to my texts. 

SAM: You look GORGEOUS!!!!

ME: Aw, thanks. It’s all thanks to the stylists. Did my hair and makeup and everything. Felt like a giant Barbie doll. LOL

It was close to midday back East, so I knew she was probably at work and wouldn’t respond right away, so I jumped over to Instagram. I followed the studio’s page and I knew they would have posted photos from last night. 

There were several pics from the red carpet, including one of me and Dieter. It was weird seeing myself all glammed up, standing beside him as he posed effortlessly for the camera. I could see that I was a bit stiff and awkward, despite the elegant dress and high heels. Still, I looked nice. Not bad for a first time, I thought. Then I started reading the comments.

She’s OLD.

Come on, girl, at least dye that gray hair. Woof.

Thought Bravo had better taste than that. 

Def a publicity stunt. Prob trying to hide that he’s gay AF.

If they think we’ll fall for that, he needs a new publicist. Lots of actresses they could have hired to help his image. Barf.

I think she looks nice. For a middle aged woman. 

There were positive comments, of course, many of them, but my eye went right to the negative ones. After all, most of the positive comments were simple heart emojis or “they look so cute” or other generic messages. The negative ones were more pointed.

I closed Instagram. Twitter would be even worse — there were so many trolls on there that I hardly ever posted anything anymore. Maybe tumblr would be kinder. I was wrong.

There were several posts under the hashtag “dieter bravo” that displayed one of the Getty photos from the night before and had commentary along the lines of “I’m glad he’s so happy” and “Aww, they made it red carpet official” but there was also lots that claimed to be insanely jealous of me for being beside him.

Oof, not to be that girl, but I could pull off a red carpet look better than that, just saying.

Not sure what he sees in her, but you do you, Dieter.

He looks AMAZING as always. Wish she’d worn something better.

She looks like she doesn’t want to be there. I’m sure it’s overwhelming and all but at least look happy to be next to him. I’d kill to be on the red carpet with him.

Ugh, I hate her, lol. Seriously, does anyone else think he’ll be back on the market soon? She is so not his type. Dieter fucking Bravo is a party boi.

I could feel tears stinging at the back of my eyes. It was silly — I knew they were making the comments out of jealousy or sheer assholery — but it was like being teased or excluded on the playground in elementary school. It still hurt.

Fortunately, my phone pinged with an incoming text.

SAM: Those stylists couldn’t have done it without something amazing to start with — YOU! I am so proud of you, chickie! You rocked that red carpet. And Dieter 🥵Don’t know how you manage to survive around him without spontaneously combusting. Dude is HOT.

ME: You don’t know how badly I needed that, chickie! Been looking at comments on social and people are brutal.

SAM: Fuck them. I’ve been bragging on you all day. Everyone thinks you look fabulous. Trolls gonna troll.

I smiled. Leave it to Sam to cheer me up. Then another text came in, this time from Simone.

SIMONE: Girl! You were on fire 🔥 last night. Your pic is all over campus. Kids are all planning to go see the movie with Miss Emily’s boyfriend this weekend. Eileen had such a sourpuss when I saw her, lol. 

ME: Thanks! Been seeing some haters online so glad the kiddos got my back. And I’m ROTFL over Eileen 🤣

SIMONE: One of my kids was IRATE over some of the stuff people were saying about you. She was going OFF! I didn’t even know she knew where the library was, lol. If a 15yo can see through their b.s., so can you.

“Hey.” Dieter came stumbling out of the bedroom with his hair sticking straight up and one hand in his boxer shorts scratching his ass. If only the fans could see him now!

”Hey yourself,” I said. “You need coffee?”

He nodded as he shuffled toward the kitchen island. “I got it,” he said. “You looking at photos from last night?”

”I was, but people are mean. Then I got a couple of texts that cheered me up.”

”People are fucking assholes online,” he said as he dumped water and coffee grounds into the machine. He slopped water onto the counter but didn’t wipe it up. He was messier than usual when he was only half awake. “First thing Carmen told me when she signed on was never read the comments.”

While the coffee was brewing, he fished his phone out of his pants, which were draped over one of the dining room chairs. He slumped onto a stool at the island and started swiping. “You looked so good last night,” he said. Then he yawned and scratched his head. “Anyone who says different has their head up their own ass or is just jealous. Or both.” 

The scent of coffee wafted through the air and a shaft of sunlight lanced through a gap in the vertical blinds. The kitchen was illuminated with golden light and Dieter’s hair became a halo of fire around his head, just for a second. Who gives a fuck what Prissy McDickface on Instragram thinks? I’m the one here with Dieter, watching him smile at pictures of us while he’s waiting for his coffee. And if Dieter could smile before his first infusion of caffeine of the day, I knew he was truly happy. Because of me.

*******************************************

The movie was a hit. It was number one at the box office that weekend, and Dieter spent most of Saturday afternoon fielding phone calls and texts from Carmen and his agent. He looked every inch a Hollywood star as he sat on a lounge chair beside the pool with his Ray-Ban sunglasses on and his phone up to his ear. 

“Yeah, set it up,” he said. “Can’t hurt to meet with them.” He looked at me over the tops of his shades and winked.

”Shit, I can’t believe all this,” he said when he’d hung up. “Carmen has ten journalists lined up to interview me. And half of them are from legit outlets, not just bloggers.” He laughed. “Who knew a twenty minute part would get so much attention?”

We had skimmed some of the reviews online and most of them had been positive. Many of them mentioned Dieter’s performance as one of the highlights of the film; several had used the phrase “Bravo’s back.”  

“And David has two meetings booked with producers this week,” Dieter continued. “I don’t want to get ahead of myself but this might be the thing to get the ball rolling again.”

“I hope so,” I said. I knew that Dieter really wanted to get back to the level he’d enjoyed earlier in his career, where he was taken seriously as an actor. He’d taken just about any part the last few years, just to keep the money flowing but while movies like Cliff Beasts might be popular with fans they weren’t taken seriously by critics. And he admitted he’d been phoning it in before he’d gone to rehab. This film was the first project he’d worked on since and apparently he’s done a very good job. 

“Just don’t get too famous and forget about the little people like me,” I added.

“I will never forget about you,” he said seriously. “And you are definitely not one of the ‘little people’ in my life. You’re huge, baby.”

“Yeah, that’s what some of the trolls online are saying,” I joked.

“Fuck them. I’ve been with skinny women and it’s like hugging a skeleton. You’re real, Em. Nothing fake about you. Which is one of the many, many reasons that I love you.”

******************************************

We had finally finished off the leftover Chinese food, so we decided to go out for dinner Saturday night. Nothing fancy, just a little hole in the wall Mexican place that Dieter was fond of, and not just because the food was good. The owners were very protective of his privacy and didn’t laugh at his clumsy attempts at Spanish. His father’s parents had been born in Ecuador, and he still had some distant cousins in South America, but Dieter and his family had only ever spoke English.

”My dad can get by pretty well,” he’d explained to me once. “He does business with one of his cousins who lives in Buenos Aires, and he sometimes visits his aunt in Santiago, but Freddy and I never learned. Hell, I took French in high school just to fuck with everyone. Freddy took German, of course.”

Although they’d come from Ecuador, Dieter’s grandparents were descended from German and Italian immigrants. “My dad’s grandpa Antonio Bravo married one of the Diefenbach girls,” Dieter had explained. “Huge Romeo and Juliet vibes there. The two families were rivals in the button business.”

My own skill in Spanish was limited to the Spanglish I’d picked up by osmosis from living in Southern California (like Dieter, I’d take French in school, because I thought it sounded fancy). But everyone at Ramon’s was friendly and very patient with our attempts to do more than just ask for what was on the menu.

”Buenos noches,” our waiter said as we sat down at our table, tucked away in the back. ”El jefe said you get free margaritas because the movie is doing so well.”

”Gracias,” said Dieter. “Um, dos platos de empanadas, por favor. Y los margaritas.”

”Muy bien! And my sister in law saw the movie last night. She said tell you she really liked it if I saw you.”

”Tell her thanks, man,” Dieter had exhausted his capacity for Spanish already. He was still running on fumes from the press junket. I could see it in his eyes.

After a delicious dinner of empanadas and enchiladas — not to mention two extremely generous margaritas — we went back to Dieter’s place and collapsed on the couch.

”If I went there too often, I’d gain thirty pounds,” Dieter said, unbuttoning his pants. 

“The food is amazing,” I agreed, glad I was wearing stretchy pants. “You want to put a movie on before we succumb to the food coma?”

”You read my mind.” He grabbed the remote off the coffee table. We were only about twenty minutes into Jurassic Park when I felt his head slump onto my shoulder. He was out. I maneuvered him into a more comfortable position so he wouldn’t wake up with a stiff neck. I never saw the end of the movie. I was tired, too.

**************************************************************

We lay in bed, both of us wide awake at two a.m. after our nap on the couch. “Whatcha thinking about?” Dieter asked, his hand idly playing with my hair.

”Not much. Just feeling cozy. How about you?”

”I’m thinking how I could get used to this,” he said. “Dinner, falling asleep on the couch, lying in bed talking about stuff … I wish you didn’t have to go back home tomorrow.” He kissed my forehead. “You know you can move in any time you want.”

”It’s tempting but it would be a hell of a commute.” 

“Quit your job. Get a new one. There are plenty of schools. You’d still be in the same union, right? Still get your pension?”

I rolled onto my back. “Deet, it’s not that easy. There aren’t all that many school library positions out there and they pay well enough that people don’t leave. Or they’re part-time at elementary schools. And other positions … yeah, I could do other stuff, but your retirement is based off of your final two years salary. If I took a pay cut, I’d get less so I’d have to work longer.”

“Jeez, you sound like my dad and Freddy. ‘Be practical, Deiter. Plan ahead, Dieter. Invest wisely, Dieter’,” he grumbled.

”I have to be,” I said. “I only have myself to rely on. You know my parents didn’t leave me anything.”

Dieter sighed. “You aren’t alone, Em. You have me.”

”For now,” I said. “I want to believe this is forever, Deet, I really do, but I just can’t jump off the cliff yet.” I sat up, hugging my knees. “I know you think I’m being too cautious, and I know it probably hurts you to hear me say stuff like ‘for now’ when you want to hear ‘forever’ but …”

He sat up and put his arm around me. “I get it,” he said quietly. “I get you. And you’re probably right. I’m too much like my mom. I need you to balance me out.”

”You don’t talk about her much,” I prompted. I knew she had passed away not long after he’d won his Oscar, but that was public knowledge.

He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Yeah, I’m still working through some shit in therapy,” he said. “My mom … she was an artist. Painting, sculpture, stuff like that. And that was the love of her life. Art. Creating. And once she created something, she moved on. She wasn’t interested anymore once a piece was done.”

I kissed his shoulder. “You don’t have to talk about her if you don’t want to,” I said. 

“When she and Dad got divorced, she moved to New York City,” he said. “That’s why I went there for college. But about two months after I got there, she moved to Europe. So I went there after I graduated. She was in Italy, so I went to Milan. Then she moved to Madrid, then Stockholm — god, Stockholm was so freaking cold — and then I got tired of following her and came to L.A.” He laid his head on my shoulder. “I was going to visit her in Switzerland after I won the Oscar. She’d actually called me and said she was proud of me. But I had a movie to do first and … it was a car accident in the Alps. She and her latest guy were on their way to Venice and a dude in a Maserati blew a turn and crashed into them.”

”Oh, Deet, I’m so sorry,” My own parents had been ill before they passed, so I’d had some warning, at least. 

He shook his head. “Hey, we’re supposed to be celebrating this weekend, not confessing our darkest moments. So let’s talk about something happy. Like my bank account after the movie earns out and I start getting some checks. We should go somewhere. Romantic getaway.”

”I do have a week off for Thanksgiving,” I said. My aunt always invited me up to her place for Thanksgiving and I always declined and ended up at some friend or co-worker’s Thanksgiving dinner. It was not my favorite holiday.

”Hey, see, making plans for the future.” He nudged me with his shoulder.

”It’s like two months away,” I reminded him. “Not that far in the future.”

”Baby steps, Em. Baby steps.” Then he kissed me and we stopped talking for a while.

******************************************

As I was driving home on Sunday afternoon, my phone rang. I usually don't like to use the Bluetooth, because it distracts me from the road, but I recognized the number. It was Sam.

”Hey, Sam, what’s up?” She rarely called; we both preferred to text. Our grown up version of passing notes in class.

“Just checking that you’re still alive after spending three whole days with Dieter,” she said. Her tone was joking, so I knew nothing serious had prompted the call. “Really, I just wanted to hear your voice. I saw the movie and it just doesn’t seem real that you and Dieter are … I mean, it sounds stupid, but I had to make sure you were still you.”

”I get it,” I said. “Hey, I’m on the freeway right now. Can I call you back when I get home? We can have a good talk. I’ll tell you all about the dress and the red carpet and … maybe you can give me some advice?”

”You better not be thinking of breaking up with him, Em. He’s the best thing that’s happened to you in a long time.”

”No, no, kind of the opposite. Shit, use your signal, you asshole! Sorry, some dude in a Tesla just cut me off. I’ve got to hang up. Talk to you when I get home, chickie.”

”Stay safe, chickie.”

I ended the call and tried to concentrate on the traffic. It was an incredibly long and tedious drive to make every day. There was no way I could keep my job and be with Dieter more than just on the weekends. And I would be foolish to quit for a guy I’d only known for a few months. Right? 

I shoved the thought to the back of my mind. Sam would help me figure it all out. She always did. 

[moonspirit]

PLEASE WHENS THE NEXT VBEOW CHAPTER IM DYING OVER HERE… i drew a sad choso to further insinuate my desperation for another chapter.. soon.. he’s meant to be sad but he’s just so cute honestly 🔥🔥🔥

Hello!!!

The next VBEOW chapter... ah T^T It was due last wednesday, but I was thrown headfirst into some tight deadlines at work, so I pushed it to saturday... and when saturday came, I had no energy to proofread T_T I was meaning to do it today, but I was filled to the neck in pending chores.

So the status is - 95% written, 500 words of a very emotional closing scene left to be written, proofreading pending. I hope to get it out by coming wednesday at the latest. But it's good! A good chapter! I promise! (I hope... hhaaa...)

Thank you for the interest T^T And for sad-choso too! He's very cute, and I'll tag him so the choso-lovers can see your cute-af doodle T////T Thank you for sending him my way xD

[impromptu-sketches]

Hi... Can I ask for BL recs that have the same vibe as Kazuki and Rei from Buddy Daddies? Can be couples with a child or without a child? Thanks so much....

I haven't read many BLs that have kids so I'm waiting until I read more before making a list!

But here are some that come to mind:

Boss Bitch Baby | rich bottom x poor top, top who cooks & cleans, cute & funny! (Ongoing & new, I recommend waiting for more official chapters to release before starting this one)

Liveta | fantasy, prince bottom x commoner top, wholesome couple. The prince in this one is definitely babygirl! (warning: some violence & stuff) (ongoing)

Killer Crush | adults, goofy sunshine actor x professional killer, EPIC COMEDY (ongoing)

●

Oh! My Assistant | adults, manga creators, sunshine top x quiet bottom, very cute! (completed)

The Metalhead Next Door | adults, neighbors, sunshine x metalhead (completed)

The Beast That Yearns to be Tamed | college, slight age gap, cute (completed)

Love Tractor | loud buff farmer x quiet city boy, so wholesome!! (completed)

Lucky Paradise | college, sunshine/goofball x quiet type (completed)

The Third Ending | adults, wholesome AF, sunshine x quiet sunshine (completed)

( ＾◡＾) I recommend all of these, especially the top three. Enjoy!

[misfitclassismyfreetherapy]

This chapter is like a slice of weed with a cinnamon on the side. And I?? strangely like it??

⚠️WARNING: SPOILERS!⚠️

.

The fact that the first thing Azz-kun thinks to do is to lessen the pressure from Iruma like " Ah, I know Iruma-sama will do spectacular but I don't want him to worry too much" Like that's so cute. He knows Iruma sometimes get anxious about the pressure of it. I love that.

-And Iruma truly has grown into a demon at heart, he doesn't see the expectations as pressure like he used to anymore. He is so excited and thrilled to surpass them. He truly has became a spectacular demon.

.

THIS.

This guy can say the most unhinged things with this face. Why. Does. He . Still . Look . Cute. Af .This is one of the infinite reasons why I love Iruma so damn much. Also this is making my ADHD flaring up with my impulsiveness. What. What does that mean? SERIOUSLY WHAT DO YOU MEAN IRUMA-

Also. This.

I live for Iruma simps coming together to work as a team, seriously we need more of this. Give me more. Greed is consuming my patience. GIVE ME MO-

I love Silvia. I vouch for more Silvia content because I said so.

Seems like this next arc will be the Battler Arc with the new kouhais, which means more yummy fluff dynamics with Iruma's army and the kouhais and delicious fresh character development on the kouhais. I need more of Iruma's kouhais content so I am so pumped up for this arc right now.

Well, that's all for my ADHD-induced opinions on the new chapter. I hope you have a great or night, guys gals and non-binary pals!