#the selfishness was astounding truly

[yuellii]

when imitating life from art

𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐒 of what kinds of gifts they would give you while we wait for maintenance to end !

feat. various fontaine characters, separately

note. reader’s gender not specified, not necessarily romantic but definitely can be, this is written pre-release, just something to kill the time during maintenance before fontaine drops !!

FURINA.

random trinkets ; She’s quite sporadic, actually. Quite similar to the flamboyance of her demeanor, she does not stick to a theme when she’s gift-giving to you especially. They must be random, they must be completely new and fun every time—and that’s not a rule, it’s only like the laws of nature.

In retrospect, they’re all endearing in the end. If there’s one theme she missed, it’s that all these random trinkets pertained to you in some way, even in the oddest of aspects. Truth be told, she picked items up once they reminded her of you, and that itself was enough to excuse the weirdness of some of her presents.

LYNEY.

magic tricks ;; The gifts he gives themselves are… rather normal. But he is a person of presentation, or so he’d say. Therefore, the true uniqueness that set him aside from any other gift givers was the performance he gave alongside them.

For even the smallest of gifts—books, drinks, Mora—he insists he hides them from you first. With a wink and a grin that can be frustrating sometimes, the true present is really how hard he tries to impress you. And so, he goes out of his way to try something new every time. If you’re not impressed, absolutely astounded and amazed, then is it really a gift from him at all?

LYNETTE.

flowers ;; The irony is that Lynette hates flowers… When they’re given to her, at least. But they were always offered to her early into her career that she just associates them with goodness, and goodness, only. So in her mind, who is more deserving of flowers than you?

She doesn’t quite know flower meanings; she likely has no idea each one even had a separate connotation. But she knew that they looked pretty, and if you paid attention hard enough, you’d notice they were displayed in such a beautiful way every time she gave them to you, like she felt the need to carefully arrange them to your liking.

FREMINET.

seashells ;; ‘He sells seashells by the seashore’—not really, but he liked mumbling it to himself whenever he came by. He liked diving; pretty much everyone knew that. He liked the water; everyone knew that, too. But, he also liked to silently hand you shells he collected from his little water sessions.

If you took the time to notice all the details, you’d see that he only brings you complete shells, ones that stents cracked or broken. It’s as if he sorted them out one by one, making sure they look pristine before selecting them as the final one—and maybe, that’s truly what he does.

NEUVILLETTE.

dinner dates ;; He actually doesn’t… give you gifts. Physical ones, anyways. He’s a very serious yet interesting man, one that leaves you guessing what his next move will be.

What he does as a treat in place of a physical present is treat you out to a nice dinner, but you won’t know what days he will ask until he is already in front of you. They’re quite nice, though, as he always picks places he knows you enjoy at least a few things off the menu. And they’re quite expensive and classy, too. You’re also not quite sure if he picks these random nights based on your mood throughout the day, or based on his own selfish discretion… But honestly, you’ll never know.

WRIOTHESLEY.

tea boxes ;; The man in charge of a fleet of exiled convicts is one you’d consider to be more scruff and too barbaric of a person, but he is gentle in the way he likes his tea. It’s a form of art that calms him down from the bottom of the ocean, one that he thinks you would enjoy, too.

And so he loves giving sets of new blends he’s tried, or sometimes specific herbs to add to really make a different aroma pop more than usual. He always prefers tea over anything, and his gifts and recommendations are his way of saying he wants you to enjoy them, too.

NAVIA.

skincare ;; The lady is quite particular with the sun and the shade, the hydrating and hydro-boosting—she takes care in the art of aesthetics and believes it’s only fair that you pamper yourself, same way as she does on her own. There’s an interest she takes, one that is so particular in which she studies your type of skin just to find out what lotion would be best, or what would keep your face hydrated.

And at first, you’d think to yourself maybe it’s a bit insulting, like she needs to look better than you already do. But wish her dashing smile always so positive when she gifts them, it’s clear she has the best of intentions.

CLORINDE.

gold trinkets ;; Being a champion duelist meant many things, but one of those features implicated an eye for the golden prize. Gold was always classy, so she liked it. Love was also classy, and she liked feeling it whenever she thought of something to give to you. It was always something gold, ranging from expensive jewelry to even cheap, gold-lined trinkets.

But she thought of you when she chose it, and she thought it was pretty enough to give to you. And it felt lovely, at the very least, as if she was sharing her winning trophies.

[mysteryshoptls]

SSR Rook Hunt - Platinum Jacket Voice Lines

When Summoned: This museum is teeming with histoire... Très bien! What a wonderful place.

Summon Line: Today, I intend to soak in these art pieces with every fiber of my being. I wish for you to have a lovely time gazing at the beauty as well.

Groooovy!!: A singing voice so lovely that even animals are drawn closer... Aah, how I wish I could also listen to the princess's beautiful voice.

Home: We will celebrate this 100th Anniversary together!

Home Idle 1: It seems Jack-kun is quite taken in by the art depicting wolves. His tail was wagging 5 cm further than usual.

Home Idle 2: If I were brought before the Fairest Queen and was told to paint her portrait, I would fall prostate before her beauty that I would not even be capable of lifting my paint brush.

Home Idle 3: It's astounding how the paint blends and shows intricate color and lighting theory... This delicate and beautiful sight can only be properly experienced in person.

Home Idle - Login: It is amazing that I am able to come visit the Land of Dawning National Art Museum alongside my peers. I am more than ecstatic to be able to witness these spectacular works of art with everyone.

Home Idle - Groovy: While Ortho and I were appreciating the art together, it stirred up some memories of my most hard-working moments. I truly do love talking about art.

Home Tap 1: A key that leads to treasure... The golden scarab itself is as beautiful as a work of art. Ruggie-kun was quite taken by the painting.

Home Tap 2: Urgh... I was so absorbed in admiring the painting that I completely forgot to blink. I should take a moment to use some eye drops now.

Home Tap 3: Sometimes I sketch animals that I see. I find the way to truly bring them to life is to capture their breathing and muscle movements as well.

Home Tap 4: The moray eels that served the Sea Witch had heterochromia... I thought it seemed familiar, and then I remembered that it's just like Floyd and his brother.

Home Tap 5: Are you fascinated by my bowtie? The color changes depending on the angle you view it at. Isn't it fantastic?

Home Tap - Groovy: If it pleases you, I'd love for you to tell me which art piece was your favorite. I wish to know which work of art warmed your heart most.

Duo: [ROOK]: Ortho-kun, go forth with splendor! [ORTHO]: Let's get it started, Rook-san!

Birthday Login Message: What would I like for a birthday present? Fufu, I'm elated enough just knowing you want to celebrate my birthday with me. Well, if you'll indulge my selfish little whim, could I steal a moment of your time, then? I have been hoping to have a chat with you about beauty for some time now. I would love to hear all about what you find beautiful.

Requested by @butterflyremix.

[dngrs-untld-hrshps-unnmbrd]

Sweet Little Killer

Ghoulcy | Cooper x Lucy | post S1 | touchstarved | hurt\comfort | angst | sometimes he's an asshole | there was only one bed | overprotective and jealous Ghoul | eventual smut

Those big eyes, Cooper thought, his anger rising. Those big eyes of hers were glistening with tears, and twice as pretty for it. He wondered if she knew the effect she had on men with those soulful eyes of hers. If she did, she was damn well making those tears brim on her dark lashes on purpose, trying to wrap his withered heart around her pretty little finger.

As Ghoul and Lucy journey across the wastes to New Vegas both of them learn a helluva lot more about each other, and circumstances and mutual attraction drive them into each other's arms.

CHAPTER ONE

The ghoul walked quickly, his back straight, eyes fixed on the horizon, while the dog and the girl trailed along behind him. A million stars scattered the vast heavens above the trio, pinpricks of cold, sparkling light.

The revelations of the past few hours had left Lucy’s insides hollow from grief. Who her dad really was, leaving Max behind, and worst of all, realizing who was tied to the chair beside Moldovar. Over and over, she heard an echo of gunshot. Had she done the right thing, ending her mother’s life? Or had she done the selfish thing so she could be rid of her? Had she taken the easy way out, when the truly good and kind thing to do would have been to take her mother’s snapping, snarling corpse back into the vault and cared for her?

Rubbing her wind-chilled arms, Lucy wondered about the golden rule. Did the golden rule even apply to a miserable situation like this? But that was silly. Of course it did. It always applied. Didn’t it?

The wind blew dust into her face, and she had to stop to cough and blink it from her eyes.

Ahead, the ghoul paused at the crest of a low hill, and examined the landscape. This strange, dangerous man had asked her to come with him to New Vegas for reasons she couldn’t quite fathom. She was anxious to think about something that wasn’t her dead mother and her murderous father, and so she strode up beside him, moving dials on her Pip-Boy.

In as confident a voice as she could manage, she said, ‘Sorry, I’ve not been helping at all. I can find us a route if you give me a moment to—’

The ghoul spoke harshly. ‘I know the way.’

He set off again, his shredded duster billowing behind him, but not before Lucy caught his narrow-eyed, angry expression. Anger crackled through his frame as he stalked forward with single-minded purpose. Anger directed squarely at their destination.

Maybe anger was the correct emotion under the circumstances. Lucy dropped her arm back to her side and followed him. She tried to summon up some anger to keep herself focused—maybe even warm—but the cavern in her chest refused to fill up with anything. 

The three of them eventually made camp for the night in an old shack that might have once been part of a bigger dwelling. The floor was sand. The roof was broken open in places and starlight shone through.

Wordlessly, the ghoul dropped his saddle bags to the ground, lay down with his back propped against the sloping sand and his booted feet up on an old tin box, folded his arms, and closed his eyes. The dog stretched out alongside him.

Lucy gazed at the ghoul, and then sat down cross-legged a few feet away. She’d thought there would be words spoken between them tonight. That they would explain to each other his astounding request for her to come with him, and her monumental decision to say yes.

But the ghoul looked like a man whose only desire in the world was to go to sleep.

Maybe he was already asleep.

Lucy cleared her throat.

The ghoul plucked his Stetson from his head with gloved fingers and covered his face.

It was a pointed message, but she ignored it. Tentatively, she called to him, ‘I thought we could talk seeing as we’re traveling together.’

‘S’late,’ the ghoul muttered.

Lucy leapt on his reluctant reply and started talking quickly. ‘True, but there’s no time like the present, as we tell each other back home. I never thought I’d say this, but you and I have something in common.’

The ghoul pushed the brim of his hat up with his forefinger and turned to her. ‘And what might that be?’ he asked softly.

Lucy gave him a weak smile as a pang went through her heart. ‘My dad. It’s not much to have in common—actually, it’s a terrible thing to have in common—but maybe you and I can be…’

Lucy trailed off as the ghoul’s eyes narrowed. His attitude rarely changed from either antipathy or anger, but she realized that right now he was dangerously close to losing his temper as his jaw flexed to one side.

Strained silence fell in the little shack.

‘Let’s get one thing straight, sweetheart,’ the ghoul said in a slow, deadly drawl. ‘I ain’t gonna be your friend. I ain’t your bodyguard or your protector, neither. You’re a liability and a goddamn pain in my ass.’

Wow. That was what she was afraid he’d think of her, but he went and said it out loud. A shameful, painful lump formed in Lucy’s throat and her voice was husky as she spoke around it. ‘If I’m so useless, then…why did you ask me to come with you?’

Those big eyes, Cooper thought, his anger rising. Those big eyes of hers were glistening with tears, and twice as pretty for it. He wondered if she knew the effect she had on men with those soulful eyes of hers. If she did, she was damn well making those tears brim on her dark lashes on purpose, trying to wrap his withered heart around her pretty little finger.

‘You vault dwellers are supposed to be the smart ones. I’m sure you can figure out why I brought you along.’

Her eyes searched his face, and then her features transformed in horror. ‘You said you let my dad go so you could follow him, but you still need me to get close to him and the rest of Vault-Tec. Is that it? You’re using me as bait. Again .’

Cooper gave a nasty laugh. ‘Oh, no, sweetheart. You’re not bait. You’ve been upgraded to leverage.’ As that revelation washed over her and ceased to bring her any comfort, as he’d intended, Cooper closed his eyes, put his hat back over his face, and settled back onto the sand to sleep. ‘There’s no reason for us to say one word to each other for however long it takes us to cross the wastes to New Vegas,’ he told her. ‘Once we get there, we’ll do what needs to be done, and then we’ll go our separate ways.’

He was ready for sleep, but sleep refused to come. The girl was cold, or she was miserable. Probably both. Cooper grit his teeth against the pathetic, shivery sounds she was making and glared at the inside of his hat. One more minute and she’d fall asleep.

One more minute.

Several minutes passed and the girl didn’t stop crying. The more she tried to smother it, the harder she choked and whimpered. Sure, she had a lot to cry about, what with putting a bullet in her mom’s flailing corpse and discovering her daddy’s a murderous asshole, but they had a plan. There was no need to get all weepy now they had a plan. 

Not having a plan, that was something to bawl about.

Lucy’s breathing hitched in a sob.

Cooper seized his hat and yanked it off his face. God fucking damn it. He opened his mouth to snap at the girl to shut the hell up, but Dogmeat’s liquid eyes reproached him in the moonlight.

Cooper closed his mouth. No way. He wasn’t going to comfort her. There would be no comforting on this little trip of theirs. No one needed to unburden their heart or ask why did this happen to poor little me. Answers were what they were going to get. Important fucking answers.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Lucy wiping away tears. A long-forgotten impulse flashed through his heart, one that belonged to the man he once was. The husband and the lover. The protector. A man who took joy in holding someone’s tender heart in both his big hands. Who would soothe and kiss away tears, pressing his lips to a cheek or a forehead or a throat.

Cooper pictured himself getting up stroking Lucy’s hair back from her hot, tear-streaked cheeks as she gazed up at him in the moonlight. I’ve got you, darlin’. I’m here.

I could…

He nearly sat up before he remembered the man who was so good at murmuring soft words was long dead. No one wanted or needed his scarred hands or lips anywhere near their tears or soft, smooth skin. In this ruined world, Cooper looked like death and that’s what he delivered. Death. Dear little Lucy’s daddy would soon be dead by Cooper’s hand, and then more of her pretty tears would pour down her cheeks. Even though she probably wanted her daddy dead, she’d still hate Cooper for being the one to put the bullet in him.  

Dogmeat gazed sadly at him, and glanced at Lucy and back at him again.

Silently, Cooper pointed at the girl and gave a quick jerk of his head. Dogmeat obediently got up, trotted over to Lucy, and lay down beside her. There was a wet, sad little gasp from the girl, and then she wrapped her arms around Dogmeat and buried her face in the dog’s fur. With a warm body to hold, Lucy’s crying ceased. A moment later, she lay down with the animal. 

The tension in Cooper’s chest and shoulders finally relaxed. When the girl’s breathing evened out a few minutes later, he settled his hat back over his face, closed his eyes, and went to sleep.

***

Lucy’s eyes felt puffy from crying when she sat up the next morning. The ghoul was already up and repacking his bag. She heard the tinkle of glass, so maybe he’d just inhaled some of his medication.

Maybe that had put him in a better mood.

The dog’s warm, furry body had brought her comfort in the night, and maybe, just maybe, they were both feeling better. There was no way she was going on this journey in complete silence. If she was hurting, he was hurting too. A person didn’t get so angry and closed off for no reason.

As she got to her feet, Lucy said, ‘Mr. Ghoul, um, sir. I can’t call you Mr. Ghoul. What’s your name? I’m Lucy, by the way,’ she added hastily.

Cooper didn’t look up from his bags. He knew her name. He’d heard her father and that can of cram—the Knight—call her by the pretty, girlie name of Lucy. But he didn’t want or need to know her name. Vaultie was just fine, or if he was particularly annoyed with her, sweetheart was even better. A cold, sarcastic reminder that she was anything but sweet to him. Darlin’—now that was something he was saving for when she really got on his nerves.

‘What if I told you I don’t remember?’ he muttered. It wasn’t a lie if he framed it as a question.

He glanced up to see Lucy’s mouth fall open slightly, and the saddest look he ever saw fill her big eyes. Sadder even than last night when she was crying for herself.

She was pitying him? Oh, this was too fucking much. No amount of leverage in the world was worth seeing a girl pity him.

‘You really don’t remember? I’m sorry,’ she whispered.

Cooper wished to fuck that he didn’t remember, but two hundred years later, his irradiated brain remembered every goddamn moment of betrayal, grief, and loss.

 ‘Well, doesn’t it just hurt to be me,’ he sneered. ‘Move it, vaultie. Let’s get going before the radscorpions do.’

Lucy dusted her ass off and started following him, but then stopped dead. ‘The…what?’

With his back to the girl, the ghoul grinned at the bright sunny morning. Something about her trepidation filled him with happiness. He was going to torment her all day, and he couldn’t wait.

He strode jauntily out of the shack, whistling as he went, the dog trotting happily at his heels.

-

Thank you for reading! Chapter Two is here.

[minzis]

Because It Was You

Art Credits: Victoria by Fritz Schaper

•┈୨A Simon Riley One-Shot୧┈•

✦❘༻Summary: Stuck in a sense of saudade Simon finds himself unable to come to terms with the reality of you slowly falling out of love with him.

✦❘༻Tags: Pure angst <3 2.3k words.

✦❘༻Author’s Note: I listened to “Waiting Room” by Phoebe Bridgers while writing if you’d like to listen as well! I just aim to hurt people as much as possible because what is life without deliciously hurtful angst :3

•┈୨♡୧┈•

Ghost knew he wasn’t that good of a man, he always felt like you were just to good for him. A pretty face and a pretty voice, everything about you was beauty in its purest form for him. How he managed to have you in the first place alone was astounding, a miracle in his eyes. You were everything he was not, a sweetness so sweet it was like a daily sugar rush. Him not deserving you was the only thing that ever plagued his mind. How could a woman like you love a man like him?

The type of woman they put on the cover of vogue, the type to have poems written about and for them. So for a beauty to haven falling for the beast he did everything he could to make you happy. No matter what you asked he’d have it done because if it made you happy then it made him happy.

You called him having a bad day at work? That’s okay he’ll just bring you a handwritten card and the food you talked about craving last week! Your sick he’ll bring every medicine there possibly is excluding the one you said you didn’t like cause it made your head hurt. Even if it was late at night he’d make the drive because it was you.

You felt lonely while he was away, that’s fine he got you two little puppies. You named one Grim after the first time you met joking he looked like a Grim Reaper. He laughed over the phone when you rambled about names he said he didn’t like it but truly he liked whatever you did. If you liked blue he loved blue and if you hated red then he despised red. His world moved just to circle around you every day and night felt like it was for you.

He never bought you flowers he always got you plants because you said they lasted a lifetime like the one you planned to spend with him. Apartment cluttered to the point you might as well call it a Garden House. His shelf littered with little things you had given him. “It reminded me of you,” you’d say with the cutest smile he’d swear he had ever seen, it was humbling.

Picking you up from work in the rain or snow since the day you said you were often scared to drive in it yourself, if he couldn’t pick you up himself he’d send a driver. There were many times where he couldn’t always be there so he tried what he could do to make it feel less empty. Outings with friends using his card insisting it was nothing compared to the millions of things he’d do for you. Gentle messages awkwardly formed but enough to show he still cared despite being thousands of miles away.

He liked to think he noticed fairly early at least subconsciously but maybe he ignored it cause it might hurt less then. The look in your eyes faltering ever so slightly as you looked at him. Maybe he knew before you did in many ways more then one. What could he do? What had he done that was so wrong? Should he have looked at you more? Hadn’t he loved you enough?

If you still came home every night to him it was enough, it should’ve been enough but he couldn’t help but want more, crave more. He knew how selfish it was but he didn’t care because it was you. It always was you and always would be you. It killed him, truly killed him in ways he didn’t even realize. How could he ever love if it wasn’t you? He didn’t know how, you taught him how beautiful love could be and how destroying it could be.

You’d come home with a bright smile hug at him the same as you always did but it never felt the same. Not once he knew but maybe it was some childish fairy-tail his love was enough for both of you. They always warn you not to trust strangers or watch for cars before crossing the road. But they don’t teach you about the pretty girls with soft voices from the heavens as if to answer the prayers he made. They don’t teach you how to let them go and to stop loving.

He felt stupid for beating at what would be considered a dead horse, he couldn’t help but try though couldn’t he? He knew you’d never cheat that just not who you are. But he also knew you cared too much for him even if it meant sticking around when you didn’t want too. He knew you were just too good of a person to break his heart like that and he took advantage of it even though it felt horrible it didn’t feel as horrible as losing you.

But seeing the sullen look on you face everyday pained him more then he thought it would. He felt foolish and stupid like the times Johnny would rant about love and how he knew Simon would eventually find someone. He told him he never would, because who could ever love someone like him? He didn’t tell him the other half though seemed deeper then he wanted to go with him.

He tried to do more no matter what it costed him, if he could give you everything he would’ve without hesitation or a single doubt. More calls, more gifts, more affection words he had to choke up because he knew it was only to tape up his tattered heart. He knew every stitch in the book but how was he supposed to stitch up a breaking heart?

He’d take you on dates the day after he’d return from deployment almost like insurance it’d make you stay longer, love him longer. But it never seemed to do what it did before, yeah you laughed and smiled but did you mean it? Did you mean it when you said you loved him? He wasn’t sure anymore, he had always been good at reading people from a glance but he lost that power at times when he had to look at you. Then again he probably chose to unsee what he seen every time he dared to stare long enough in your eyes to realize he was losing you.

It wasn’t a future he had foreseen coming one, one he hadn’t planned an outcome for. He never wanted kids before but with you he felt like he could try, it felt like a life he could have. A version of life in where he was happy with what he had. He never truly had a plan for the chance you would leave him one day, under the belief his love could be enough. You had been together for over a year or two now so he let his guard down, he let himself be vulnerable for the first time in a very long time. It was very apparent the life he planned with you wasn’t going to happen since the first day you leaned back from his kiss.

Restless nights he spent out on deployment in fear when he came home you weren’t going to be there. A feeling that resonated deep in his bones that you were going to up and leave. He hated it all every second he felt helpless like the same child who was still scared of ghosts. It all caught up fairly quickly with his work, he was either ferociously vicious or barely stumbling through the day. It almost got him killed on more then one occasion.

He couldn’t ever bring himself to tell you whenever he got injured cause deep down he knew you’d just feel even more guilty then you already did. Sure you hadn’t done anything but you had done more by doing nothing. He was either getting more injuries or racking up an inhumane amount of kills. Kills that were unnecessary and downright cruel but he hadn’t cared when it was the only outlet he could find. He felt sick with himself spending hours at the sink scrubbing his hands before he dared to ever touch you with hands like his. The blood never came off though.

He sighed shaky hands wrapped around the edges of some shitty sink in another safe house he couldn’t remember the name of. Fingers clung at the edges of his mask tugging it off. He stared in the mirror for what felt like hours at a face he couldn’t recognize anymore. He was almost glad you fell for this face and not the horrid mask. The thin layer between who Simon and Ghost was, he already knew Ghost was unlovable but he had hopes for Simon.

He tried to be a better man with substance one deserving of your time and love. But you didn’t do that, you had loved both parts of him he tried so hard to separate. He began to hold the belief that every part of him he wrote off could possible be loved. Parts of him you called imperfectly beautiful because even if he had come home deeply stained in blood he was still good. And you made him feel that way for a longtime so the thoughts of losing that were never going to go over well.

Reckless and dangerous was what he had become while away. It scared the team the little regard he had show on multiple occasions after endangering his life like it meant nothing. Simon had always been careful purposely with each step he took so for him to make a mistake at all seemed alien almost. Despite his protest Price decided to dismiss him for a few months in hopes it would clear whatever he had going on.

He started at the door what felt like hours but before he could open the door himself the door swung open. “You’re home early,” your tone was angry causing him to stiffen under your sharpened gaze. He expected more but you just turned back further into the house leaving the door open for him. “Price called,” you stated eyeing him as he inched his way into the kitchen. His eyes softened seeing you turning back to the stove stirring the pan, his favorite meal. Despite your anger you still made him his favorite damn meal.

He really wanted you to stay.

“He said you almost died Simon,” you spoke softly and he hated how disappointed you sounded. He couldn’t bring himself to speak unable to find the words that would carry enough apologies. A loud silence filled the room as he remained still staring at your back. This was fine it was going to be fine.

“Simon baby I can’t keep doing this,” you spoke breaking the silence.

“I know love, I’m sorry,” his breathing hitched in between his words.

“You can’t keep saying sorry and still going out there recklessly,” you rebutted curtly. “I don’t know what I was thinking, hell I don’t even know if I was,” he answered with a softness.

“I love you I really do but I can’t keep living out of fear everyday because of your stupid decisions,” he nodded his head understandably but for some reason it only seemed to upset you more. “I know-” you cut him off angrily. “No you don’t know cause if you did you wouldn’t keep doing this,” you motioned with your hands.

“For fuck sakes Simon how am I supposed to live worried everyday cause you run out there like you’re invincible, how am I supposed to live knowing that?” you called out desperately to him for some explanation in words but all you were met with was silence.

“Forget it let’s just eat,” you grabbed at the two plates placing them on the dinner table one in-front of the other before half-hazardously sitting down. His eyes followed your movements silently coming to terms. He wasn’t sure what to say or do when nothing was going to fix what was only going to further worsen things.

He didn’t know what to do when everything he knew about love was from what you taught him. You hadn’t taught him how to stop loving you though. He wondered if he could love anyone else like he did with you. Didn’t know if he had it in him to love that strongly again. He was grieving a loss that had long been coming. From the look on your face, fork dancing around the food, he could tell you no longer wanted to be here.

He prayed every night with tears in his eyes that this day wouldn’t come. He asked the gods for forgiveness in all the things he had done wrong. For them to just let him have you and he’d never ask for anything again. He’d live in a hellish purgatory for an eternity if he just got to be happy in this lifetime it would have been worth it.

Maybe in the next lifetime you’d choose to love him again.

He knew it was for the better, he couldn’t keep you chained like this when you can’t help your heart, just like how he couldn’t help his. It’s funny how cold the air had felt before but it managed to be so warm around you. His shaken hand gripped at the ring box in his pocket he long should’ve returned and like the calm before the storm he finally spoke,

“I want to break up.”

[simlit]

Chosen of the Sun | | forest // seventy-four

| @sani-sims | @maladi777

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EVE: Your Grace! KYRIE: Mm, I thought we were on a first name basis. EVE: laughs What a terrible time to joke. KYRIE: I think it’s the best time. What happened? EVE: You collapsed. I’d thought the curse had overcome you. KYRIE: No, at least, not yet. It was my fault, getting all worked up over… Indryr warned me it’d get worse before it got better. EVE: An admission like Taiyo’s would be hard for anyone to hear. Even without what you’d done for him figuring into the equation. He’s only just left now, I can go and fetch him— KYRIE: Don’t trouble yourself. If he wants to come in his own time, that’s for him to decide. EVE: I would rather you rest comfortably, but I feel it’d be wrong for me not tell you— HIGH PRIESTESS: Kyrie. KYRIE: Well, if it isn’t the other shoe. HIGH PRIESTESS: You told me you’d alert me as soon as he was conscious. That was our arrangement. EVE: He’s only just awoke. At least give him a moment to think, if not breathe. HIGH PRIESTESS: Yes, well, he is awake now. You’re free to leave. EVE: I’d rather stay to make certain he’s well— HIGH PRIESTESS: I can make certain myself, or will you not allow me a moment with my son? KYRIE: laughs Oh, stars above. The gods are full of jokes these days. If I’m alive at all, it’s because of Eve’s consideration and skill. You could do her the honor of showing at least a modicum of respect. HIGH PRIESTESS: I am endlessly grateful for your contributions, My Lady. Now, please. A moment. EVE: scoffs Very well. KYRIE: Is this the sort of behavior you would show to one of your precious Chosen? It’s incredible you can’t even fake civility in the face of this ceremony you profess to care so much about. HIGH PRIESTESS: Don’t patronize me, Kyrie. While you lay here like some negligent child. You asked me to trust you once again, and here we are. The sheer scope of your irresponsibility is truly astounding. KYRIE: Why should I have to live long enough to hear you lecture me a thousandth time? If I had one wish at all its that this curse would kill me quicker. HIGH PRIESTESS: Do not speak so recklessly. KYRIE: I’ll speak as I wish, if only because my voice is the one part of me you can’t control. HIGH PRIESTESS: And what will your sister say when she returns? KYRIE: Don’t threaten me with my own sister! For all you know, Alphanei is dead. And maybe you do know it, Gods be certain you’d never tell me the truth. There must be a reason she’s beyond my sight. And maybe I’m glad of it. If the last month has taught me anything, it’s that being Chosen of the Moon is nothing but a prison. If this is how you treated her all these years and I stood idly by, oblivious to what she endured, then I wish you would have neither of us. HIGH PRIESTESS: Your sickness has made you delusional. You’ve grown up inside these very walls. Tell me what have you wanted for? Nothing. I have done everything in my power to protect you both. To keep you safe— even from yourselves. But you have always been the troublesome one. Ever since you were a child. Caught in your own head, selfish and stubborn. HIGH PRIESTESS: Do you know how many mages I have sent north? How many elven knights have traveled out to retrieve Her Grace? Do you know how many have died in that pursuit? No, Kyrie. I spared you those details so you did not have to live with guilt of just how important you really are. KYRIE: As tools. But not as people. Regardless, now that too is on my conscience. We never asked for this role. We never had that choice. And because of this city’s insistence on a corrupt ritual, hundreds have been subjected to needless slaughter. If I could end it all by forfeit of my life, I would not wait a moment longer. HIGH PRIESTESS: Always a fool. I’ll send for the King’s clerics. And after you are cured of this, we will a find more suitable way to proceed. ASTER: Your Grace, heard you were awa— Oh. Am I interrupting something? KYRIE: Not at all. Mother was just leaving. HIGH PRIESTESS: Hmph.

[waeirfaahl]

My thoughts about Steele from "Balto" (1995)

Another unexpected topic for discussion. Steele never was in the list of my favourite characters/antagonists, but since I already made lots of Balto related posts, why not to discuss about Steele? I never liked this character even as a villain, because it was stereotypical arrogant bully without any interesting nuances or depth/complexity with absolutely lame and anti-climaxing defeat, and the problem was even worse, because the main character didn't kick his ass (my frustrations about this aspect you can read here). Most part of potential interesting nuances were erased due to the voice of Jim Cummings (the legendary badass chameleon of voice acting), who replaced Brendan Fraiser (he originally voiced Steele). Steele sounds evil from the beginning, so you expect from him something dangerous from the beginning. With Fraiser's voice, I think, we could see his path from just arrogant popular bully-narcissist to the sadistic psychopath and murderer, i.e. it would be more subtle and hence terrifying, we would see his falling into madness and becoming full monster he previously hid within.

What astounds and amuses me (even makes me laugh) — many fans in attempt to explain/justify Steele's hatred toward Balto create some kind of "tragic backstory", where either "Steele's parent(s) were killed by wolves" or "Steele and Balto had one dog parent, so they're half-brothers, and Steele as elder son was abandoned by the dog parent in favor of Balto" or whatever, other fans simply reduce Steele to just ignorant and egocentric racist or xenophob, who hates Balto 'cause Balto is different and half-wolf. What if I say that both sides are wrong? If humans (except of Rosie) and dogs (except of Jenna and maybe Star and Doc) are ignorant and racist/xenophobic and hence cruel toward Balto, so they always rejected him, Steele hates Balto for absolutely different reasons that have absolutely no relation to racism or xenophoby. No, even simpler — Steele started to hate Balto after the certain events. Before these events Steele ignored Balto and basically knew nothing about him except of vague "some wolf-like stray mutt".

Steele is a selfish narcissist, sadist, manipulator, psychopath and liar with megalomania and complete permissiveness. His entire motivation and core are vanity and desire for glory, he wants to be the famous and beloved champion for all to his death. He won in races for already 4 years, hence he is an aging champion, who doesn't want to share or to loose his place and status. And for either saving his status or for not letting his status to someone else, he will kill a rival and even own sled team without any hesitation. You could notice, how he harmed the rival sled dog team, when they almost outran him, you could notice his reaction at how Balto, catching Rosie's hat on the track, unintentionally outran him and hence "ruined" his triumphal finishing, so Steele started to bully Balto and his friends (Boris and Jenna, for example). And, well, as I once pointed out, Steele is a coward, who can attack only weak ones.

You could notice his rage at Balto's line "I was the fastest dog!" and how he immediately insulted him with the line "You was the fastest what?!" (i.e. it's not a simple "You're not a dog, you're a wolf, so you have to be with wolves, go to wolves", it's a moral crushing and dehumanization like "You're worthless and dirty abomination, not a living being with rights"). And, yes, as I said before, Steele doesn't care about Balto's origin, Steele doesn't care about wolf blood in Balto. If Balto was a full-blood dog, either stray mongrel or domestic purebred husky, Steele would bully him no matter what, finding his other weak spots. Steele as an aging champion feels in Balto a rival, the young and talented rival with truly noble and heroic soul and with better qualities (for example, fast run), but since humans and dogs reject and don't trust Balto for being half-wolf, and 'cause Balto himself is ashamed of his wolf heritage, Steele uses it against Balto, morally crushing him with focusing on his "worthless" wolf roots (and also insulting Balto's mother for falling in love with a wolf) and using it to demonize Balto in humans' eyes even more, cutting any chances for Balto to show his talents to humans and hence to become a sled dog and a new leader and champion, in Steele's worldview stealing his (Steele) place, victory, status and role. That's it, nothing more. Steele is a narcissist and psychopath, who cares only about own ego and glory, he respects nobody, he loves only himself. Plus, according to the novel, Steele never had any real feelings to females, Jenna interested him simply 'cause she was red and never felt anything toward him ("Jenna will succumb to his charms — after all, didn't everyone?"), i.e. it was just a challenge and a game for him, where Jenna is another trophey and a way how Steele can feed his own ego and use her for his pleasure.

Plus, for making Balto's life worse, Steele also intentionally started to harrass Jenna, i.e. it is a fixation like "This stray young brat will never win in anything. I'll deprive him of anything what can make him happy. He dared to ruin my authority in eyes of my owner and other humans and dogs!". That's the core of the antagonist, who cares only about own ego. The closest character to Steele is Darla Dimple from Cats Don't Dance — spoiled, cruel, hypocritical and arrogant human actress, who cares only about own ego, glory and public perception of her as a kind and gentle hero, and she'd ready even to kill, if she sees somebody, whose talents can overshadow her.

And you probably wonder — who is responsible for what Steele is? Why he is egocentric, glory-hound and spoiled sadist? Who is to blame? Well, I think, I know the answer — Steele's musher is the main reason of what Steele is and why. Have you ever noticed how Steele gets rid of the rival sled team, and his musher never punishes him for this? Have you ever noticed, how Steele provokes Balto to fight, and Steele's musher ignores this and Steele's inadequate reaction toward Balto, and how Steele's musher literally mocks on Balto, firstly pretending to be a kind guy, who wants to pet Balto as the winner and perfectly knows that Balto is a half-wolf and that Balto didn't attack or harm dogs during running, but after Steele hurted Balto, the musher immediately started this "I can't trust to him. He's a part wolf! He could turn on me!"?

He spoiled his dog and allowed to Steele to do everything he wants, at the same time psychologically mistreating, when Steele doesn't jump for his standarts and expectations. And since no musher demanded a rematch, Steele's musher most likely is the richest guy of Nome and the most famous in sled races. Arrogant and ignorant asshole, who called Steele as the one who loses his form just 'cause Balto outran him on the short 100 meters near the finish. Yep, he blames the dog that ran in sled race for many miles...

And the same thing with other dogs — the dogs from the rival team told nothing about how Steele harmed them during the race to others — classic "Don't demonize the all-loved champion". I also can confidently tell that Steele and his musher were based on Seppala, who (despite many really awesome accomplishments — for example, how he made sled dog races popular, how he made many world records and travelled in Alaska, how he made Siberian Huskies a breed etc) was gloryhound asshole, who didn't believe not only in Balto, but also even in Togo (when he was a pup). Steele is a manifestation of Seppala's arrogance, while Steele's musher is a manifestation of Seppala's ignorance. It's interesing, how Simon Wells, the director of the original Balto, describes Steele: "Steele was basically the quarterback of the football team. He was the god because everybody said he was a god. I saw Steele as the kid who misunderstands his role in the world and suffers from jealousy and anger issues. We originally envisaged Steele as the most popular kid in school; the king of the jocks. He has always been the best, and never had to really work to maintain his position. In a word: cover-confident. Never having had to try very hard, he is not ready for adversity when it confronts him, and his grip on right and wrong goes away as soon as he is rattled.".

This information gives interesting nuances to the character and partially confirms my assumption that exactly the musher made Steele what he is now. Steele perfectly knows that he has only the mask of the hero, but no matter how he will deny this fact, he'll never become the hero with real talents and noble qualities, it's fake, it always was and always will be the fake just like all those golden collars, especially the one he won in this 4th race, sabotaging another team. That's why he hates Balto — Balto has everything, except of humans' trust and love, the jewel hides within the wolf body everybody views as dangerous, while in Steele's case — nothing, only rotten and ugly abomination hides within "attractive body of the dog sportsman".

Well, we could get way more, if Steele's death scene was kept and handled a bit better. Many people find this scene brutal, cruel and very dark, but... I disagree. The scene, which was the perfect end for Steele's arc with his golden collar that symbolized his lie, hubris and madness and led him to his demise (dogs ordered to Steele to give his collar to Balto, 'cause Balto is worthy one, but Balto refuses to take this collar 'cause he doesn't need this, as well as Steele in anger refused to do this as well), how he dies from suffocation and then crushing by tons of coals that bury his body to death... well, was quite stupid for certain reasons.

First of all, Steele dies due to own stupidity, 'cause he again attacked Balto in attempt to murder him, but accidentally missed and caught the collar on the lever, which strangled him and opened the hatch with coals. It's not poetic death, it's a comedy of "Tucker and Dale vs Evil" level.

Second, Balto as an idiot worries about Steele and mourns on him. Yep... he feels bad for the asshole that brutally bullied him and tried to murder several times... WHY?! I despise all-forgiving pacifistic protagonists... And third, it's funny that the mood of the scene is in "Dogs and Balto in fear and horror look at last seconds of Steele's life, they can do nothing", despite the fact that Balto and other dogs from his team could leave the harness, so they could do something, if they so wanted to help him.

I don't think that the crew deleted this scene due to dark content, I think that they rejected this idea due to budget limits.

Do you want to hear my assumptions and interpretations of Steele's backstory? Well, in addition to how the musher spoiled and mistreated him at the same time, I would assume that Steele was a replacement of the musher's previous dog he kinda really loved and considered as the perfect sled dog, maybe they even looked almost the same, so no wonder, why "Steele was the god 'cause everybody said he's a god" — perfect addition to the idea with the mask, the fake hero mask. Plus, I kinda like the idea that Balto's husky mother also was the musher's pet and best lead dog, so Steele either was under her command in the team or they were leaders together and he even wanted to be her mate, but since she fell in love with a wolf, the musher started to hate her for "betrayal" and made Steele the sole lead dog of the team, as well as Steele hated her for her choice, and they both took out their anger on Balto for his mother's choice, while Balto even had no idea about that. It sticks to the idea of Steele's fear to lose his place to Balto, who, becoming the famous sled dog, can return his dead mother's honor she was deprived of by hypocritical humans and dogs (what Steele obviously didn't want — Balto was the reminder for Steele about his own inner emptyness and worthlessness, about how Balto's mother chose a wolf over Steele, and Steele also sees in Balto not only the husky "traitor" he kinda loved, but also Steele saw in Balto the wolf, who "stole" her from Steele). And, well, since Balto accepted his wolf nature and saved Rosie and other kids and became hero, he succeeded in this.

With these nuances and details, I think, the character would be more fleshed and complex, as well as his arc and death really would be emotional, dark and heart-breaking. As well as Balto's sadness about Steele's death and also intention to help him and to give a chance despite all Steele's malice to Balto and others would make sense in such conditions, if Balto vaguely heard that his mother and Steele once were close friends. The contrast between love and forgiveness and grudge and hatred or whatever. Balto is kind and open-minded as a young who can change, while Steele is deluded and stuck in as an old who can't change. That's what I thought about the character in the movie.

[astrangergivingthestrangewelcome]

Dr John Seward is just a really, REALLY fascinating character because he is a man of extremes, and honestly reading his notes on Renfield vs. his journal it's like I am experiencing two completely different people. Every interaction he has with his friends, every single interaction I am astounded by the depth of his love for them and his selflessness. He is so considerate, and he always thinks of their needs above his own, and he's so warm. Contrast this with the selfish coldness that radiates off the page with Renfield... there are a two or three moments where I would say Seward recognizes the humanity of his patient, but overwhelming he can be counted on to use this man as an outlet for his psyschological interests and experimentation, it is always about what Seward thinks would be interesting to explore and never what Renfield needs. Everyone in this novel falls on a spectrum of good and evil, and I feel that more than any other character, Dr Seward has the greatest ability to choose whether to harm or help the world, and he's such a wild card bc unlike someone like Van Helsing, Dr Seward does not truly understand the consequences of his own actions, and I don't think he ever learns. I don't think at the end of the novel he was particularly moved by the circumstances of Renfield's death, nor does he understand how he did wrong. That man is a wild card straddling two paths, and the novel Dracula is not really concerned with examining that any further, but you could really easily do a retelling where this is more in focus.

[makedonsgriva]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

Omg hi! First of all thanks for asking! I haven’t answered this question before and I absolutely do not mind answering this. This is a tough one though because I’ve consumed so much media and love so many characters it’s so difficult to choose but I will give it a shot nonetheless. Also these ten characters are not in any particular order.

Laurent Of Vere: Laurent is introduced as the frigid and dangerous prince of Vere in the book 1 of the captive prince trilogy. I HATED this man on my first reading but as the trilogy progressed, I just fell in love with him. He had an astounding amount of growth and character development. Not to mention his qualities and traits make him an all around admirable character. I may not be putting the characters in this list in order but Laurent is definitely my favourite character of all time.

Fleabag: Fleabag from Fleabag is another character I deeply love. She is funny, she is selfish, she is a tragedy of her own doing. It’s the way she is so deeply flawed yet so damn loveable at the same time that gets me. We are all fleabag at the end of the day aren’t we?

Baz: Baz from Carry On trilogy had to be here like the list won’t be complete without my poor little meow meow. He is one of those few characters who is very very close to my heart and it so hard to not love this dramatic gay vampire. Just love his snark and he is so funny??? I love it so much. Not to mention he truly is one of the kindest characters I’ve read.

Penelope Bunce: Another character from the Carry On trilogy. Penelope means the world to me because as a brown person, I don’t get to read a lot of books which feature brown characters. So seeing a character who is the best friend of the protagonist and has a major role in the series, it’s very refreshing and reassuring to me. Penelope is smart, stubborn, never admits she might be wrong but her growth over the three books is amazing. I will always love her.

Eren Yeager: literally one of the most tragic characters I’ve seen till date. As the protagonist (antagonist? anti hero? Idk anymore) of attack on titan, Eren is one of the most iconic characters I’ve come across till date. His unconditional devotion for his friends and his character arc from being the righteous hero to someone who becomes completely disillusioned by the end, it’s fucking amazing.

Geto Suguru: I have a beef with Jujutsu Kaisen and the reason is that Gege Akutami came up with absolutely amazing characters only to under-utilise and shit on their character arcs with his half assed plot. Surprisingly though, Geto’s character arc is amazing. I love it when heroes lose the sight of their goals and become the villains instead and Geto does that. His character development is really good and I love him for that. Incredibly realistic and refreshing to see.

Jiang Cheng: Jiang Cheng from MDZS remains one of the most relatable characters I’ve come across ever. Like I feel him on a spiritual level. The complexity and depth of his emotions, his actions, being so fucking good but never being good enough… good lord my heart straight up bleeds for him. I will always love Jiang Cheng.

Xue Yang: Hear me out okay. I know Xue Yang from MDZS is a psychopath. I’m not a Xue Yang apologist either. What he did to Xingchen was appalling to say the least. But Xue Yang is undoubtedly an incredibly well written character. He loved or should I say obsessed over XXC in such a sick and twisted way, it made for a very interesting read. The way he deluded even himself into believing that his extreme actions were all to torment XXC and not because he enjoyed his company and liked him… like girl be ffr right now who tf are you kidding. But yeah love me an insane psychotic gremlin.

Violet Evergarden: Violet from Violet Evergarden is one of the most heartbreaking characters I’ve come across and also one of the most unique. I’m a sucker for stories that tell the most human stories and Violet as a child soldier discovering these emotions, thoughts and vivid lives of people while coming to terms with her own trauma really gives her a special place in my heart.

Howl: Howl from Howls Moving Castle is one of my favorites because he is a hot babygirl. As simple as that.

Thanks so much for asking! Sorry it took me a while to get back to you but I hope you liked this list 💗💗💗

[bladesmitten]

10 characters | 10 fandoms | 10 a negotiable number of tags

tagged by @mathlann yay thank you!!

there may be a recurring theme with some of the characters but let's not unpack all of that. also after the 5th placement, they're all tied in my heart okay?

franziska von karma - ace attorney. THEEEE favourite character of all time ever since the first word she says: "revenge." i could write 10 paragraphs of everything i love about her but i'll save you all from that. but perhaps the best thing about her is that she breaks the cycle without even knowing it, and proves herself a better person than her father without compromising her identity. <3

childe - genshin impact. also loved this guy upon his very first appearance. a character who got into a traumatic situation when he was young and gained eldritch powers because of it? and nevertheless remained an optimistic person? but also wants to gain strength and power at all costs? say less!

wyll ravengard - baldur's gate 3. ummm need i say more? fine, fine. he's so charming and handsome and dork supreme and king of whimsy, but most importantly, he's kind, despite everything he's been through. it takes an enormous amount of strength to remain hopeful and kind, and a lot of people (unfortunately) overlook that. also his character trope--paladin-coded warlock--is so so interesting and--[gets dragged off the stage]

shiv roy - succession. she's so sucks!!!! i love you selfish and arrogant babygirl who not only has daddy issues, but has mommy issues too. i love you shiv who would do anything for power and is the most like her father and gets trapped in the cycle anyways!!!

azula - avatar the last airbender. azula did nothing wrong.

severa - fire emblem: awakening. i love you insecure babygirl who overcompensates for everything by being abrasive. who feels like she's living in the shadow of her perfect mother. who ends up just like her mother in a darker timeline, protecting the exalt in an (un)requited love (lucisev truther btw)

jinx - arcane. i like her in the game but i love her in this series. i was really astounded with her character, what happened to her as powder and her parallels with her sister vi, and how she became the jinx we all know and love

mako mori - pacific rim. i love her dynamics with stacker and with raleigh ;___; also her sparring scene was soooo gooooood. the entire movie is just great, favourite of all time

claire - fleabag. i love claire's entire character and her juxtaposition with her sister fleabag, who's a mess. eldest daughter energy. learns to be selfish and pursue what she truly loves instead of maintaining her reputation at the expense of her well-being. also i just really love ambitious over-achieving characters

eve polastri - killing eve. i'm ignoring season 4 but god, i love the way her character changes throughout the series. she's so enthralled with villanelle and she hides it under the guise of pursuing an assassin but really she's so fascinated by her and it leads to her ruin as she keeps pursuing her with no regard for anything or anyone else in her life.

tagging, if you like - @bladeofavernus @droodle-bug @landlordevil @katagawajr @courierseis @targaryeirene and whoever else wants to do this :3c

[peachymilkandcream]

Part 2 of siren please!!

Siren Part 2|Levi x Evelyn AU

(A/N: Ooh I'm so glad you liked part 1! This was a lot of fun to write so thank you for requesting!)

WARNINGS: implied noncon/dubcon, imprisonment, yandere behaviour/themes, misogyny, forced pregnancy, kidnapping, violence, degradation, attempted suicide, manipulation, mind breaking, forced marriage, etc

============================================

Levi admired his bride in her tank. He'd never been one to be greedy with treasure and gold, but with this beauty, with this he would allow himself to be selfish. How could he not? His life's work right in front of him. Hours he had spent already just admiring her, the poor thing felt uncomfortable but she would soon come to learn he could care less about things of that nature.

"Do you have a name siren of the sea?"

"Release me or I'll curse you." She spat.

Levi shook his head and clicked his tongue. "Such a brat. If you're going to be that way I'll just plug the holes and let you suffocate, would you prefer that?"

She visibly shudders. "Evelyn, call me Evelyn."

"That wasn't so hard, was it?" He steps back, thinking. "Evelyn, now that is a lovely name for such a lovely creature."

"What do you want with me? If you wanted my scales or my hair you would've killed me by now."

"I suppose you're right on that, think of how rich I could become selling authentic mermaid scales and hair. I'd be wealthy enough to buy hundreds of ships and rule the entire world not just the sea."

"Then why haven't you."

"Because riches don't interest me. Gold doesn't satisfy what I truly want."

"And what do you want?"

"To hold the sea in my hands. To tame it and make it mine in the only way I know how." He stared at her with desire burning in his eyes. "By breeding it and crushing it down until it submits to my hand."

A scowl comes to her face. "You will never tame me."

Levi turns and reads from one of his many books on the legends of mermaids, using his finger as a guide. "The theory is that mermaids, when deprived of their water, will grow legs and transform their lower half to that of a regular woman. Is that true?"

Her silence just serves to make his grin wider.

"Why don't we test that." He opens the top of the chest, pulling her forcefully from the water despite her struggle.

Once dropped on the wooden floor her tail flails madly. And to Levi's amazement, it seems like the tail transforms before his eyes into a pair of legs.

"Astounding."

Evelyn covers herself from his lustful gaze. Trembling with the cold and with her fear.

"Don't worry my dear," He says as he drags her to his bed. "I'll warm you up."

=============================================

To ensure Evelyn didn't escape, each time he was through with her Levi through her back in the tank, where her tail re-emerged. When he wanted her he simply brought her out, firmly bred her and then dropped her back in.

This cycle repeated until he forcibly got her pregnant, again and again. Only then was she allowed to be kept out of the tank for the remainder of her condition since he feared what would happen to the unborn child if she constantly changed form.

Pirates and nations far and wide heard of the dreaded pirate's mermaid bride. All cowered in fear and refuses to come near a man who had tamed the sea. His violence was already famous, but his power was reinstated by having a siren of the ocean on his arm. His erratic behavior cooled, but no one dared to cross him for fear that now he had something to protect, he would be even more vicious.

As promised Levi came to rule the sea and all in it and above it. King above all earthly powers, and especially over his little siren.

[hologramcowboy]

what’s with people calling A celebrity who is known to be genuinely nice yet shy and quiet a douche? I know people that knows Jensen personally and I know people who met him outside of conventions and they all say the he is genuinely a nice person but is he usually very quiet yet polite to people. Just because a few people have had bad experience with him at conventions because he is exhausted or had a bad day doesn’t make him a douche. People even the genuinely nice people can have bad days and that doesn’t make them a douche. People need to understand this or they need to learn that Jensen himself is reserved and needs to understand that his bodily language is not of someone with a star complex.

Anon, if you truly knew people who know Jensen intimately (which is the only way you could know he is not a douche) you wouldn't be on this blog.

Jensen's onstage or onset persona is NOT his true character. His true character can only be known by very few people. If you knew how many celebrities are worshipped as nice people and then are monsters in real life you would not be sending in such asks.

Jensen decided to brand himself as a drinker, who had a floozy for a wife and who is arrogant and selfish in his business decisions. He did this through his choices and only has himself to blame if people have started catching on he's no angel. Yes, everyone can have a bad day or make mistakes but our true character comes through in how we deal with those mistakes. Jensen deals with nothing, he takes no responsibility and I will stop here because it is heartbreaking to me to know he is so far from the angel I perceived him as.

Also, meeting him briefly at conventions and such doesn't mean you know him or his character. Many people claim to know celebrities but the truth is, the way actors interact in real life is very different from their celebrity persona and it's all based on character.

Being polite a good person does not make, some of the world's biggest narcissists feign politeness. If you are going to be a fan of Jensen look deep, see deeper things because politeness is flat, bland and tells us nothing about him.

It really astounds me how very little his fans can say about him, it all revolves around the same words, bland, empty. It's really sad to me that no one is seeing how he is self destructing and making degrading choices.

As for his body language, he definitely shows signs of high arrogance. Even in his Rust interrogation he was arrogant.

So while I praise your good intentions, I no longer believe Jensen is a "shy", "nice" person with deep seated values. I think his only deep seated value is the mirror.

""

[michelleelizabethtanner]

Do you think Beth really believed Rio was coming after them after the truck thing in 1.09? I always just assumed she was jumping to conclusions and was so far out of her depth ("He looked at me funny"), but was there something else to it? Did she really want to take him down deep down?

Hi Anon! Thank you for the ask! Idk if I have a super good answer though. I’ve always considered this scene more based on the mistakes Rio made in underestimating Beth’s reaction. IDK why I haven’t thought more in-depth about why she behaved the way she did.

Unless I’m misremembering, everything in that episode showed her anger, and none of her actions around Rio signified fear. I don’t think she was even jumping to conclusions about what he might do to them. I think she was just mad. Yet another man putting her in her place, taking away her power and her financial “security” because he decided her life for her. So she retaliated. Her “we’re good people” excuse was just a cover to get her girls on board. It’s the line she uses all the time to manipulate people (including Rio.) “I’m a good person. I’m a mother. I eat at P. F. Chang’s.”

The fact that this woman can never think through the consequences of her choices surrounding Rio truly astounds me. She cannot be so stupid to blindly lash out and expect nothing to happen to her. I’ve been kind of thinking about this irritating aspect of her behavior. The ways in which she hurts Rio over and over, even once she sees the actual hurt on him, she doesn’t stop. Contrast that with how she enables Dean over and over, who has a proven track record of lying to her and actively harming her. So it makes so little sense why she would lash out, even contrary to her own wellbeing, in this particular situation. She couldn’t have expected that he would be imprisoned forever just because she gave up some laundering details. So what then? Was it a cry for his attention? A cry to be seen? It’s gotta be. Her nihilistic tendencies come through so strong around Rio. He brings it out in her. So it’s like she doesn’t even care what happens to her, as long as he keeps looking at her, as long as she’s feeling that power he makes her feel.

Which brings us back to what was so polarizing about Beth to so many viewers — she’s selfish af. She doesn’t want to be. She’s torn. She keeps thinking if she just does one more shitty thing to Rio, she will prove her goodness to the universe. Prove that she’s worthy of having a husband who’s faithful, and children who don’t struggle with emotional disorders, and friends who choose her even over their own husbands. This woman has been abandoned and scarred so deeply in her formative years that she’s absolutely desperate to matter and to be chosen. (Kinda like someone else we know.) But Rio seems to be her one “safe space” to be herself. “Just being myself.” And while that may sound romantic (and it IS), it’s also toxic af because for her to be “herself” she has to all the time behave abusively (ugh, I hate that word because it isn’t quite accurate to their dynamic but idk what other thing to call it… maybe retaliatory?) toward Rio. He feeds the monster that she hides from others. He isn’t a “good person” so it’s fine for her to take her trauma out on him. And he keeps coming back for more. And he keeps wanting her despite it. It’s that good old cycle of abuse, continually perpetuated. They find so much warped validation in each other they can’t quit.

Anyway, I went off on a tangent. Sorry about that! These asks are so helpful in getting me back into a Brio state of mind. Reminds me how I love analyzing them. 😊 Makes me wanna not work and write Brio stories (that I’ve been stagnant on for like 2 months now 😩)

[exitrowiron]

2022 Trek Travel Cross-Country Bike Trip Epilogue

The stats

21 riders including 8 women, 42 riding days, 4 rest days, 14 states, My personal stats - 3,735 miles (avg 89 miles/day), 142K ft ascent, 232 hrs moving time, 16 mph avg speed, $0 prize money

For comparison, the stats of the 2022 Tour de France

176 male riders, 21 riding days, 3 rest days, 2,081 miles (avg 98 miles/day), 157K ft ascent, 80 hours moving time, 26 mph avg speed, $2.7M prize money

I'm guessing that the average age of the Trek group was approximately double the age of the average Tour rider - we were older and slower but went considerably farther.

In anticipation of your questions:

Most memorable part of the trip: The rides in the Western States brought stunning views and memorable climbs/descents. If I had to pick one segment, I would recommend the Columbia River Gorge.

Most difficult part of the trip:

Days of temps in the 90s/100's turned asphalt roads into broilers, cooking us from our cleats to our helmet. Also, cold rain is no fun but we only had a few days of this. I also had a stomach bug that caused me to DNF a day and suffer the next few days as I recovered, but fortunately it was relatively short lived. Due to the DNF I missed 54 miles/4k ft ascent of the trip.

Physical impact:

Yes, I lost weight, but not more than 10 lbs. My body composition changed though; I lost fat and gained muscle. I didn't grow giant quadriceps like a pro rider but my cycling V02 max improved by 15% to 60. I never got sore like I do when I run and my only injuries were saddle sores in weeks 2-3 and a mild case of cycling elbow (i.e. tennis elbow) the last few days of the ride.

Was it easier or more difficult than I expected:

I really had no idea what to expect. I got stronger and faster as the ride progressed and was less sore than I expected. The ride was challenging, but it wasn't torture and I'm proud of averaging 16 mph.

Would I do it again?

No. I wanted to see the country from the saddle of a bike and to physically challenge myself and I've accomplished those goals. As the guides attested at the closing dinner, we had an extraordinary group of riders (kind, fun, thoughtful, strong) and I can't imagine being able to repeat that good fortune. Lastly, 47 days is a long time to be away from Beth, family and friends.

Things I learned riding coast to coast across the northern US:

1. It is ridiculous to think that 21 people in their 50s and 60s (and one in his 70s!) can bike across the country in 46 days. But what if they were provided:

• A training plan 8 months in advance;

• The best road bikes available;

• A GPS attached to their bike with turn-by-turn directions of the carefully planned route;

• White glove service managing all the logistics (luggage, hotels, meals, etc.);

• Refueling stops with water, sugar, salt, and encouragement every 17 miles in addition to a fully catered lunch stop each day;

• The support of 5 of the best guides in the business?

If you do all of that, then a group of ordinary (albeit highly motivated) men and women can do the extraordinary.

2. We live in a truly beautiful country; the Columbia River Gorge and South Dakota badlands were breathtaking, but so too were the simple pastoral beauty of the Midwest and the charming towns and villages of New England.

3. The vastness of US agriculture production is astounding and difficult to comprehend. Given the amount of land devoted to producing corn, the rise of electric vehicles and decline of gasoline/ethanol consumption will be nearly as disruptive to the farming community as it is to petroleum producers.

4. If political signs, flags, and bumper stickers are to be believed, there is a deep and troubling political divide between rural and urban America. This divide is being stoked by selfish interests and must be reconciled.

5. Those thick black rubber bungee cords with metal hooks on the ends that people use to secure things to their car or truck? They don’t work. Beth and I have picked up tens of them in the two miles of I90 that we’ve adopted, and I dodged hundreds of them lying on road shoulders while riding across the country. They should be taken off the market.

6. This trip reminded me of a lesson I first learned when I began Ironman training. The average human body is capable of amazing things, much more than you imagine. I occasionally hear the advice, “Listen to your body.” I think it is important to clarify that advice. Remember that your body evolved to crave an afternoon on the couch with a bag of chips in one hand, a cookie in the other and a milkshake to wash them down. So, when you’re listening to your body, listen carefully. Distinguish between when your body doesn’t want to do something and when your body can’t do something. At mile 14 on day 19, sick with a stomach bug, my body said it couldn’t continue and I listened. On the other mornings when my body said it was tired, I ignored it.

7. Bicycling is much easier on your body than running. Over 47 days of riding I never felt sore (with the temporary exception of my butt); I never needed a massage or used my Theragun. As an older athlete I plan to incorporate biking more regularly into my training regime to give my body more time to recover from the impact of running.

8. It is a privilege to do this ride. It is a privilege to have the good health, time, resources, and support (thanks Beth and all of you) to pursue an odyssey like this for 47 days. It isn’t lost on me that there was no racial diversity on this ride; that’s likely a reflection of the privilege this ride requires and the work we have left to do as a society.

9. When riding a bike a long distance, nothing matters more than the wind. Depending on the wind, a 40-mile ride could either be a thrilling 2-hour sprint or a grinding 3-hour sufferfest and in this respect, this cross-country ride is a metaphor for life.

Riders are quick to complain about a headwind, but very few will acknowledge a strong tailwind; on those days riders are more likely to credit their pace to their fitness and fortitude. This is a natural human tendency, despite the profound and more importantly, invisible influence of the wind. Bikers likewise compare their segment times to the results of other riders on different days despite those comparisons having little meaning without an acknowledgment of the wind (which never happens). Some riders have lighter, faster bikes, but those differences are visible, more easily accounted for and generally have less impact the invisible wind.

Riding against the wind isn’t just a physical challenge, it is mentally and even emotionally draining. I have a power meter in my pedals, and it tells me how much power I am producing. 220 watts with a good tailwind can easily propel me at 20 mph. Conversely, when riding into a headwind those same 220 watts may not get me above 14 mph. Here’s the interesting thing; even though I’m working equally hard in each scenario, pedaling at 220 watts for an hour with a tailwind is easy and fun; I’m going fast and making great progress. By contrast, I can rarely keep up a 220 watt effort for more than 30 minutes when facing a headwind; the slow pace and drone of the wind whistling in my ears are simply too frustrating and discouraging. It’s the same amount of work, but one feels considerably more difficult than the other.

Of course, a headwind isn’t necessarily an inevitable, unavoidable obstacle. A rider may be able to alter his course to one which is protected from the wind but still reaches the same destination. Or a rider could pick an entirely new destination, one which turns the headwind into a tailwind but arrives at a different but equally suitable destination. These options are usually only available to riders who are familiar with the area, riders who have been there before or have seen other riders navigate the optional routes and destinations successfully. Rookie riders are unlikely to deviate their course or destination and will generally attempt to grind it out in the absence of knowledge of the alternatives.

Sometimes a headwind is simply unavoidable, however. On those days, riders can help each other by taking turns pulling at the front, shielding those behind from the wind and giving them a chance to rest and recover. On many occasions during my trip, stronger riders would pull weaker riders for hours to the destination simply because they could and they didn’t need the help of the weaker rider.

At the risk of being preachy here (probably too late) I had the tremendous good fortune to be born with a strong tailwind. I saw other riders (my parents and their friends) reach my intended destination and I followed their course. In addition to a tailwind, I had the benefit of being pulled by older, more experienced riders (work mentors and great bosses like Jack ONeill). And finally, Beth Koetting is a strong and capable teammate who is riding with me and sharing the work.

3,735 miles taught me to be appreciative of a tailwind and acknowledge it’s contribution. More importantly, it’s taught me to recognize when others are struggling with a headwind. Odds are good that these riders would be equally successful with the benefit of a tailwind. I am reminded to help them find a new route or destination, or better yet move to the front and give them a chance to rest and recover.

10. The love and support of family and friends can make even the most challenging journey more enjoyable and for that I thank all of you.

Thanks for following along.

Mike

[baelatargaryen]

insane that in a season where characters commit multiple crimes, including:

otto spending 20 years attempting to usurp rhaenyra which culminates in him and his supporters committing a coup where they kill lord beesbury, imprison multiple people including rhaenys (who only escaped because she was freed by erryk cargyll), and hang lord caswell for attempting to warn rhaenyra

larys killing harwin and lyonel strong, as well as attempting to murder mysaria on alicent’s orders, and burning her brothel down

larys sexually assaulting alicent, and aegon ii being an outright rapist 

aegon watching children fighting pits in which his own children are either participating in or an environment they are at least raised in???

even daemon killing his previous wife, rhea royce 

otto outright ordering ser harrold westerling to ASSASSINATE and murder rhaenyra on dragonstone???

criston cole literally beating a man’s head to a pulp at a royal wedding, calling rhaenyra a “spoiled cunt”, murdering lord beesbury

the character people TRULY think is selfish is rhaenyra for *looks at hand* not forcing her gay husband to have sex with her multiple times to impregnate her. like...all of the above characters have attempted or committed multiple crimes, whether well-written or poorly, and instead thought to yourselves, “well. rhaenyra...she’s so spoiled and selfish”, the hypocrisy and misogyny is ASTOUNDING. 

[schattenwerfenkeineschatten]

confessions | @songandflame continued from x

❛ and you, you were the one i treated the worst. only because you loved me the most. ❜

He could have chosen to say anything, something nonsensical and vapid as he usually did, but for someone as self absorbed and selfish as him, it was surprisingly self aware. That's what made it worse. So he knew... he knew she loved him sincerely and he found joy in his cruelty? Would it have hurt less had she behaved more like his friends' muses? Last time she had seen him, Valjean was escorting him from the property with Cosette not far behind. The fact he had the nerve to reappear and choose to say that, truly astounded her. "Then I pity your wife. I pity anyone who makes the mistake to love vermin like you."

It stung. Worse than anything she had previously called him. Worse than anything he had felt in a long time.

His own self-loathing had hounded him through most of his years, ever since he was a little boy, but to have it reflected by Fantine! His little Fantine, who had once looked at him as though he were her entire world... That hurt.

Tholomyès nodded slowly, swallowing. "So do I, God have mercy," he replied in a low, choked voice, bereft of emotion.

No one knew his inadequacies better than he. Not Fantine, not his wife, not even his father.

Cécilie was a good woman, the perfect wife. Always willing to look the other way. Tholomyès was fond of her and had done everything within his power to afford her a good life, to make her happy. But there were things he could not give her. And nothing he could give could make up for what he had stolen.

"I'm sorry." He sounded close to tears.

[nightspires]

i just had an utterly boggling conversation with my mother re my dad helping me move out next weekend.

so far my dad has been really supportive. he took me out today to go get some moving boxes, has offered to hire a van on moving day (and pay for it himself) and has said he’d drive all my stuff the ~3hrs to my new place and unload it into my new flat. v sweet of him.

now my mum is a different story, bc she has not offered any help to me at all. even today while i was freaking out about how much stuff i had to get done, she just shrugs and keeps playing candy crush.

anyway -- my dad has a full time job so we need to figure out the logistics of the move bc it might not line up with his day off.

and then my mum turns around and says that my dad is selfish and that he "never does anything to help [me]" bc he won't book a day off work on the day i'm meant to move in. she went on a literal tirade about him being a "neglectful father"...... not at all seeing the irony in the fact that she hasn't lifted a single finger to help me, and certainly hasn't made any offers of help for the future.

the lack of self awareness is truly astounding.