#the wedding crashers

[crazy56u]

Just woke up 15 minutes ago, let's do this.

Once again, no saga sell. Meanwhile, in a pre-SAG-AFTRA Strike Hollywood...

Why do I get the feeling this guy was originally meant to be played by Kevin Costner?

"So, no filters." So, I take it this is at least in the 90s?

A movie where a scientist clones shit, I think I saw that on MST3K.

And right off of the bad, we're waxing poet about scripts. That's how you know this aired after the Writer's Strike ended.

Hey, look who finally decided to show back up to work!

I still say Tom's getting retconned through Ben preventing the time skip at the end of the season.

"This is the stuff dreams are made of." If that is meant to hint at my earlier theory being correct…

I swear to God, I thought Ian was wearing a red hat.

I feel like this was the cheapest episode to make, given how this was filmed without sets.

April 4th, 2000. Two fours, and a leap year, so of course Not Kevin Bacon died.

Hey, Ben, look on the bright side, this is pre-Jimmy Fallon-era Tonight Show. ...but, that does mean Jay Leno...

"Old address", teah, sure, keep telling yourself that…

Ben, I'm willing to bet you just lost him.

"Damn, I really suck at this Hollywood thing. … Addison, can we do commercials early?" "Yeah, why not…"

"Who loses Neil Russell?" People who don't love him?

And Ben commits a federal crime, and opens another man's mail.

A backyard wedding? In 2000?

And Ben almost gets run over by Roman soldiers.

"I think I may have blindsided people this morning, I don't think they expected me to come back to the show."

"What do you think about your first leap?" "…technically, wasn't that the bank robbery one?"

You know, while we're wasting time with this Tom and Addison shit, we could've seen more of Ben hitching a ride with the Romans.

"Hey, Rachel, no biggie, but I saw a thing on a computer, and I'm slightly freaking the fuck out."

Ben's got a golden ticket, this is the closest we will get to him leaping into Willy Wonka.

Look, who among us hasn't found themselves lying on the floor?

Ben, the biggest sitcom on TV was Full House, shut up.

…why is Neil's life slowly turning into Season 1 of Bojack Horseman?

"We get him to Leno, everyone wins. Literally the only time someone ever said that ironically."

"Look, please, I know I crashed your wedding, but I wanna get married again, this is 100% not a nervous breakdown."

"He's a sidekick, he's not a leading man! He doesn't vaguely remind the audience of Bojack Horseman!"

Uh oh, the badass brought out the whipping stick!

"Oh, wait, you're an agent, I'm not mad anymore."

"I don't wanna think, I don't wanna talk, I just wanna go on a boat-" "Okay, let's calm down!"

I wonder how Jay Leno must feel knowing this entire episode is built around him…

"I was quitting way too soon, we're only 15 minutes in!"

"We're winning Laura back!" And Ben and Addison low-key have a stroke.

Meanwhile, in... Blade Runner, I guess.

"Ian? Why are we in the blue dimension, and why do I suspect it involves Project-bullshit?"

What if it turns out this chip was what Jenn was talking about, and nothing else secretive was going on?

"Unless you find Ben, you'll never have a TV show."

Ian, you know what show you're on, you fucking know lying won't work in the long run.

"I can deal with your savior complex." That was a straight faced lie.

…was he calling Charlie Sheen? "Charlie Carter." Okay, thank God- okay, they're connected to Katzenberg, nevermind.

"You know, I once helped a bounty hunter-" "I thought you were never going to talk about Las Vegas, Summer?"

"How do you know she's the one?" "Because if she ain't, I'm getting on a boat and dying at sea."

And Neil indirectly shames Addison.

"And you're just drifting through life, lost, putting right what once went wrong-"

"We got flowers, we got the opera legend, we just gotta commit a crime!"

Robbing a wax museum. Only in Hollywood.

Addison, you can't keep shitting on Ben behind his back, he will find out, and he will get pissed.

"Ben's earned a little leadership. As a treat."

And Magic delivers some awful books. (ba-dum-ching!)

We're now in a horror movie, hot fucking damn.

Okay, I legitimately almost screamed after Not Yoda Jumpscare.

Is Not Jason Vorhees about to spring to life, I legitimately am getting freaked out the longer we stay here.

"Just get the tuxedo and go." "POLICE, OPEN UP, WE KNOW YOU'RE ROBBING THE WAX MUSEUM!"

Ben, you know what you have to do: Help Neil pick his cuffs, and escape the cops.

I don't like how quickly Ben learned the Hollywood magic of gaming the system.

But, hey, at least the cop took the bribe.

I don't know how Jenn is able to read that book, if that spotlight is shining directly at her like that.

I technically called it about that chip thing.

"So, that shitty chip is the only think letting us find Ben? Ian, no offense, but you suck at this."

"This is destiny, Summer. You know what happened the last time I tried to talk my way out of an arrest?!"

"Did Plan A go wrong?" "Ben, Neil almost got fucking arrested, what do you think?"

"It's about his daughter." "No, it's about Laura." (why-not-both.gif)

Addison, that is what we in the field like to call "Overplaying Your Hand". Now Ben's mad mad.

We have officially reached the "Relationship Bullshit Event Horizon".

"Hey, Frank, why is that agent yelling at a ghost about being abandoned for three years?" "Forget it, Jake, it's Hollywood." "I fucking hate you for making that joke."

"You know what else I did? (pointedly leaves the Imaging Chamber)"

Addison, no offense, but I'm still on Ben's side, not yours.

"Hey, Summer, why do you look like your heart got stomped on? Come on, we gotta crash a wedding!"

There is a non-zero percent chance that mug has bourbon in it.

"Hey, Addison, I know you and Ben had that fight, but I gotta talk to someone about this chip-"

"We have a few last minute flowers." "Ma'am, I know that Neil is hiding behind them."

"Summer, the bushes ate our tulips. I told you this would happen!"

Okay, having quickly looked this up, The Wedding Crashers came out in 2005, so if it turns out Ben indirectly caused the movie to exist-

"Neil, look, you're very sweet, but I am now convinced this is a nervous breakdown, do you need a blanket, or…"

"Look, time's passed, neither of us are the same people anymore. ...I can't help but notice your agent has that look on her face, so maybe that relates to her as well, but, I gotta go get married, have fun."

I'm actually impressed that Neil didn't bolt while Ben was busy apologizing to Addison.

"We still have 'The Tonight Show'." "Nah, fuck that, call me Ishmael."

[Annnnnnnnnd text limit!]

[nokmietarchive]

I also compiled the ROTTMNT: Wedding Crashers clips. I tried to prioritize better quality so it's a little all over the place. This is just for media archival purposes. If anyone has any cleaner or additional clips let me know and I'll be happy to throw them in!

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was friends with Zendaya while she was going through the plot of the Challengers movie, and while she sometimes pops up going through it, I was busy going true my own competition but not in tennis. I was entertained in a badminton tournament with various players and at some point we crashed a wedding in tennis and badminton clothes.

[meep-meep-richie]

'' Just living the dream. ''

[imyourbratzdoll]

Prequel to ‘wedding crasher’ about Ransom and reader’s past relationship? Particularly about the sex where Ransom used a 🍭 to fuck reader with, like he was bragging about in the fic. 🫣

~ Love you sweetie! ♥️

hey baby! I hope you like it, I'm sorry for it being so short! I love you so much!

prequel to wedding crasher

summary - you get fucked with a lollipop by your boyfriend ransom.

warning - smut, food play, fucking with a lollipop, swearing, being called a whore, implied cheating, oral sex.

18+ only please, the gif I use isn't mine, divider by @newlips

Yours and Ransom’s relationship was… Different. He was the trust-fund baby, a man who didn’t know how to do his own work. But you fell in love with him, spending some fantastic years full of love and adventure. The incredible part of your relationship was the sex, which never got dull between the sheets. You remembered the time he had pulled the lollipop from between your lips, pushed you down onto the bed and fucked you with the sweet-tasting treat.

“You like that, Kitten? You like when daddy fucks you with your lolly?” Ransom growls, thrusting the strawberry-flavoured lollipop deeper into your cunt, twirling it and rubbing his thumb against your swollen clit. “You’re such a fucking whore, teasing me with these fucking lollipops all the time, wrapping your plump fucking lips around them like the slut you are.” Your back arches, whining when he slams it into your sweet spot. 

“R–Ran… Oh!” You squeal, your eyes rolling into the back of your head, wondering how the hell this feels so good. You blink, trying to get rid of the fuzziness covering your vision, spying Ransom between your legs. Your mouth drops open as he leans forward and wraps his lips around your puffy clit, groaning and sucking, his hand still moving the lollipop in and out of you. “F–fuck!” 

“God, you taste so fucking good. Like strawberries.” He greedily sucks, lapping at your sopping cunt, watching you fall apart underneath him. Ransom smirks, sucking harder, grinning as your juices flow out of you and cover him and his hand. “Such a fucking whore. Couldn’t contain yourself, huh?” He pulls the lollipop out of your tight hole, directing it to his mouth and popping it inside. “Mmm, best-flavoured lollipop I’ve ever had.” Half-lidded eyes stare down at you, and your head flops back as you try and catch your breath, feeling all tingly between your legs. “Might have to keep doing this so I never run out.” Your head lifts, and you stare at him with wide eyes.

Ransom was your first love, someone you had thought you’d end up marrying. But he never thought the same way about you. He was a man that couldn’t commit to one woman. 

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[weird-little-book-lover]

Artist: MCU Portal

[austenmarie]

Slides of a tiktok I made. GOOD OL ACOMAF /ACOTAR BRAINROT 

[mydarlingdearestdead]

okay but Barty is the type to crash Evan's wedding.

like a marriage to a pureblood girl from his parents and none of his friends (minus Reggie) are allowed and then at the "does anyone object to this union" part, Barty just comes striding in.

[gmzriver]

Rachel McAdams as Claire Cleary in "Wedding Crashers" icons

like if you save or use

[glassrtz]

wedding crashers 💐

[wolfpup026]

Seven Sentence Sunday

Thanks @mirilyawrites for the tag!

Sharing some old unfinished/unposted stuff this week.

Here's a study from The Haunting that I didn't finish, idk how to render teeth and I couldn't decide if it looked weird.

And here's some studies from Wedding Crashers, I was going to post these but then decided something about the likeness was off and I didn't know how to fix it.

No pressure tags: @primewritessmut, @lgwilt, @insert-witty-user-name-here, @in-my-loki-feels

[meep-meep-richie]

❛ 𝘪 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘱𝘴? ❜

Owen Wilson || Obsessed

thanks to @mobius-m-mobius for the inspo

[mad-c1oud]

Charlie-centric Guapotrio drabble for @brainrot138am !!!!!

they requested the guys with two different lines and you'll see the one I chose, but don't fret, I'm probably going to write the other one too haha

This is less of a drabble at 900 words but oh well, thrice as many people = more words

enjoy! sorry for any lil errors, m sleepy

+++++

“I feel like everyone is miles away.”

“Charlie,” Roier deadpans, “You are literally squashing Cellbit right now, no?”

Charlie groans loudly, burrowing further into the little space between the loveseat and Cellbit. The feline hybrid chuckles, bright and rumbly as it vibrates Charlie’s arm, his chest, his head. He is not squashing the other, in fact, there isn’t enough squashing going on because Cellbit brought his notes with him into the living area of his castle and has been buried in them while Roier remains buried in lunch and finally, Charlie is buried in the couch. And Cellbit. Sue him, the cat is warm and while there’s fire all over the castle, it’s a weirdly cold flame that has his joints locking up. It’s awful. Cellbit isn’t because he’s warm but Charlie still hates him a little bit for the stupid, icy flames.

“That’s not what I meant, dude.”

He shivers involuntarily at the sensation, the bitter chill freezing his limbs when it shouldn’t, and Cellbit makings a questioning mrrrp, reaching a hand down to bury it in Charlie’s hair. He can’t help the pleased hum that teeters into a chittering rumble when claws drag careful lines along his scalp. Cellbit purrs in kind as he tries speaking, words slurring but clear as day, “What is it, chayote? Meu chuchu?” Charlie knows exactly what he’s being called. It’s as insulting as it is really fucking sappy, ugh.

“You both suck, no sympathy for me, a li lol slime stuck in Eggxile and away from his…” Charlie isn’t sure how to finish that sentence actually. He’s not sure what they are but it definitely isn’t friendly, but the other two are married, and Charlie is just kind of… hanging around. There is also a lot of kissing involved. It’s complicated, sure let's say that, “—guys, his dudes. Alone.”

Cellbit laughs and abandons his notes, finally sinking into the loveseat so Charlie isn’t just cuddling his leg like it’s some muscly teddy bear. No, now they’re cuddling for real, legit-ly. Cellbit pushes Charlie into the back of his loveseat like he’s trying to make Charlie become one with it or let himself become one with Charlie, arms wrapped around him in a suffocating embrace. That and the loud, engine-like purring are almost enough to make the slime literally melt, but he holds it together because he wants this right now, something solid and warm. Something sturdy. Something… sure.

“And whose fault is that, pendejo? Hm? Who put himself in Eggxile and won’t visit unless under force? I had to lie and say Cellbit and Richas had gotten sick and I needed help.” Roier steps out of the kitchen and into the space, footsteps growing soft as he hits the rug. Charlie can’t see him from where he’s curled into Cellbit, but he can hear how Roier is upset, masking his annoyance and frustration under playful insults. He wilts into Cellbit’s arms more, admittedly shying away from a look he knows the spider is giving him.

“Gaupito, se amable con el.” Cellbit mummers quietly as Charlie hides further in his embrace.

“S’rry,” He mumbles into Cellbit’s shoulder. The hybrid smells like dust and old books, graphite, and rubber. He also smells like Roier. He smells like them, a smell so intertwined with the couple that there’s no name for it, not notes that stand out, just— it’s them.

But not Charlie.

Roier sighs and Cellbit nips lightly at Charlie’s shoulder in reprimand, annoyance, scolding. He pats a hand to the feline’s back in a clumsy apology. For what? He isn’t sure exactly, but the other accepts it and goes back to holding Charlie close, a hand coming back up to rake through his hair again. The spider above them speaks while Charlie tries to not doze off.

“Move over, you two. Apparently, someone thinks they are all alone and I guess we have to fix it,” But nothing happens because Charlie is just so fucking sleepy and warm and cozy, and the only thing that could make this better is— “Okay, fine. Cellbo, help me move the verdura to the bed, there’s more room there.”

Charlie snorts as he’s pulled from the loveseat and into Cellbit’s arms and still warmwarmwarmwam, “Was that a clever pun riffing off of Cell’s stupid nickname? Proud of you for doing it without gagging. I am rubbing off on you, man.”

He cracks an eye open to look at a blurry Roier, several sets of arms crossed stubbornly, but there’s a fond smirk lighting up his eyes. Fucking hell, why are they both so pretty. Charlie smiles back like it’ll convey his frustrations as Cellbit begins walking towards the bedroom.

“We rub off on each other a lot, man, but not that right now. Sleep. Also to prove a stupid point to a stupid slime.”

Charlie laughs and laughs and laughs the entire trip, Cellbit’s own chuckling buzzing his arm as Roier tries to remain unamused and failing miserably.

They prove their point very well.

A few hours later, after some much-needed sleep and aggressive cuddling, Cellbit wakes them both up with a gentle shake, confusion coloring his tone when he finally gets their attention.

“Uh Gaupito, weren’t you making lunch?”

Like an answer, Charlie’s stomach rumbles. Roier cackles tiredly, thumping his forehead against the back of the slime hybrid’s neck. “Yeah, I was.” It’s enough to set them all off again, rolling around in soft, worn sheets, laughing so hard someone starts crying and another gets the hiccups.

It’s fine. Lunch can wait a few more minutes, Charlie is already a part of a clingy sandwich anyway. With Cellbit at his front and Roier behind him, Charlie doesn’t feel as… far away. It’s not a long-term solution, but it’s enough right now. They’re enough.

[shadow-usagi]

@chokit-pyrus (@chocolatepyrusart) gifted me this wonderful picture of Miyamoto Usagi and ...wait, who is that?

[lomakes]

Wedding-Crasher Raven but with wings 💖

[hood-ex]

I just finished watching the films Brothers and one of the brothers is taken for dead and then the younger brother starts getting a little closer to the older brother’s wife but guess what the older brother never really died. Now I’m just sitting here at the sort of hilarity that it was different circumstances but DC kind of did this with Dick and he just never knew about it. I’m not saying I’m for or against but just as a reader it’s like they are never going to mention it? Different circumstances and different arcs but it also happened twice now and still like no mention of this to Dick? Like Dick is out here and not knowing nothing and it’s kind of sad but also a little funny.

Wait there's a movie where Jake Gyllenhaal and Tobey Maguire are brothers 😭?? Where the hell was I in 2009 to have missed that? Probably dancing to Good Girls Go Bad lmao.

Oh are you referring to jaybabs 😭? No literally, Dick has no idea about the jaybabs moments, it's wild. He has no idea that Jason and Babs kissed while Jason was only wrapped in a towel. Although, I literally can't remember if Three Jokers was canon or not. Either way, there were other light jaybabs moments outside of that.

No but lmao this is why we were joking about Jason crashing any type of potential dickbabs wedding. And Dick finding out at the altar about any type of tension or romantic interest between jaybabs. Like yeees, Jason! Fuck up that wedding king!!

Or wait are we also talking about Jason and Kory (or Kori as a I loathe to call her)? Both? Both. Sure, why not.