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#there is room for nothing else in my brain today
milo-is-rambling · 6 months
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I wish I had friends near meeeeeee to distract me from my brainnnnnnnnnn
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#need to talk to anyone irl who isn’t related to me or dating my mom or my therapist#anyone else near me please I’m losing my mind#nature isn’t healing me sleeping in a fully dark room all day isn’t healing me how do I magically fix this without having to put any work#into it oh I can’t oh u have to do the work okay how do I do that. therapy once a week. oh. okay. yup.#can I speedrun it? oh no? I can’t. oh damn. okay fine whatever. therapy once a week. AND I HAVE TO ACTUALLY LISTEN AND DO WHAT SHE SAYS. bro#what the hell okay fine#well here I am !!!!! where is the fixing where is the feeling better I feel like all I do is stir up all these touch emotions from every#part of my life at once and then she sends me off to rot for week before I come back and talk again#I just feel like I’m losing it!!!!! and ik it’s extra bad bc birthday countdown is on in my brain and im stressed and i feel like a huge#fuck up that can never be fixed and like I will die having done nothing with my life except weigh other people down and so exhausting and my#brain won’t ever shut up like yes I get it years and years and years of built up shit that I never properly dealt with and still hold blame#for constantly and I feel like I will never be fixed like I CANT be fixed like this is a losing battle and I just am struggling today man#idk what I was saying I just took my morning weed hit to try and relax my back a little and now my brain is like scrambled eggs#which is good that means it’s working#I’m gonna try to take a nap maybe cause I only slept four hours and it was like choppy thru the night and then maybe I’ll go to the lake#later I’ve been feeling the need to be in a body of water recently
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arcaneyouth · 1 year
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~~~~~
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nexus-nebulae · 2 years
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the executive is really just not functioning today huh
#ive spent about. probably two total hours if i sum up all the intermittent segments. just staring into the distance trying to. Do Stuff idk#today's one of those days where literally nothing seems appealing even the normally very appealing stuff#and its makin the executive function kind of take a nosedive#just. right off a cliff. there it goes#hopefully it shall return but that is an indeterminate amount of time away#i need. to like. Exist™#like. eat and shower and clean my room more#but i don't really want to do anything more than just sit in the dark#i haven't eaten i really need to eat#it's just the only ready-to-eat food we have are those little uncrustable sandwich things but sugar is Not Good rn#some days i just Cannot consume anything too sweet if it has even a moderate amount of sugar i can't#and the only easily microwaveable food is.. i don't know how old it is so it is Dubious#and also we made the enchiladas kind of wrong so they're Weird and autism brain isn't happy about it#and then from there the only food i can eat is stuff i have to actively make#like pasta or ramen#and i can't do that right now#but like.... what else do i do#i need more easily microwaveable meals but either they're Just Terrible or they're super expensive for the amount of food you get#or we just don't have enough room in the freezer to store more than two microwaveable meals#so i eat them all in one day and can't get back to the store to get more#i desperately need food that i can just store for these days#but I'm not allowed to have a minifridge in my room despite how much it would help my several disabilities :/
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toastsnaffler · 10 months
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hmm.
#i wasnt able to sleep for ages last night and in my delirious tired state i was thinking ohh.. i dont thiunk my friends like me#:-(#and then i thought oh. well thats okay i like them i guess i can live with that. and now it keeps turning over in my head#its weird bc ik on some level its just insecurity. but it feels to me like fact so im not even like. anxious or sad abt it#its like the feeling is in another room. i dont think its within my ability to change. cant make ppl like me if they dont already innit#i mean i think im nice to ppl im not rude and i try not to cause anyone problems#maybe dislike is the wrong word i think maybe just neutral/indifferent. i dont think ppl tend to feel anything very strongly towards me#and something abt that is rly sad but in a distant way. i do care very deeply abt other ppl and like them a lot but im aware im not-#really emotionally accessible or trusting enough for people to feel like they have real connection with me#and i dont think im really in a place to be able to resolve that right now or at least not by myself bc its deeply rooted likely in trauma#it would take a lot of active digging + time from someone else i think + there isnt rly anyone in my life close to me#and tbh. even if i was in a place to do that kind of self work it ultimately doesnt really matter bc nothing will ever be enough for me#like im always going to be at least a little sad and dissatisfied socially bc thats just how it works. its not even worth thinking abt rly#not sure where im going with this my brain is so foggy today just turning it upside down and shaking the thoughts out#anyway#.diaries#.vent#<- i guess. not rly tho#just usual sunday blues. emails to send tmr and im very very tired
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housepixie · 1 year
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moving every single piece of furniture in my apartment around because i am doing great in the head rn
#about to talk about recovering from my ed so please protect your sanity if reading about that would be bad for you#i feel like i'm finally snapping after about five years of trying my best to minimize how bad my everything is#probably because i've managed to eat consistently this month (a big deal bc every other time i've done this i've intended to give up and#i don't have that intention this time which is so frightening. it felt very safe being under the cloying control of disease frankly and i a#also very terrified that my stomach is just going to straight up explode or refeeding syndrome or what if i give up but#i woke up today and my skin was a normal color with no weird undertone of grey and my fingernails were pink and i felt goodweird about it.)#so now my stupid brain works and it turns out it's overwhelmed by having wasted five years of my life on trying to slowly kill myself#and all the other stuff. the reasons or whatever#meanwhile i have SO MUCH TO DO i don't have time to be recovering from anorexia!!! i have errands to run!!!!!!#i need to go to the dry cleaners and pick up my dress for the wedding i'm going to this weekend#which uhhhhh being seen. cool. cool!#i need to go to my friend who's getting married's apartment and retrieve the makeup i accidentally left there#i need to go grocery shopping#i need to go cleaning supplies shopping#i need to clean the bathroom#i have company coming and need to set up their room#all i seem to be capable of doing is moving my own furniture around#if nothing else i'm great at picking up a table and moving it to a part of my room and going 'no this is disgusting' and moving it again
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slutofpsh · 2 months
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strip for me.
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part three
pairings: hyungline x reader (sunghoon & heeseung)
synopsis: hyung line got you trapped in a situation that you can’t get away from.
wc: 6k
warnings: smut, minor dni, bullying (not promoting violence or bullying), degrading, dirty talks, curses, masturbation, hyung line being mean. this is not proof read.
note: next part will be fivesome with the hyungline so it’ll take time. be patient. please reblog and reply to. it is highly encouraged. thank you so much for your support. part one (here) ; part two (here)
slutofpsh 2024 © all rights reserved.
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your grip over your phone tightens while a text message flashes through its screen. a one sentence text is all it takes for your whole system to feel thrilled.
‘i’ll see you at the locker's room after my morning practice.’ — psh.
that was all it says. sunghoon’s not the texter type. out of all of them, he’s the least you expect to appear on your messages and so to receive something from him makes your stomach churns.
it’s still very early and after you checked your phone, that’s the first thing you saw.
Park Sunghoon is the team captain of your school’s ice hockey team and every thursday morning, they have practice before going to class. today is that day.
you didn’t reply to him and honestly, you’re contemplating whether to go meet him or not. obviously, something like what happened yesterday may occur. And no matter how bad does it sound, a hint of excitement stirs at the depth of your mind.
despite it, worry and agitation overpowers you. sunghoon is a very mean guy. you’ve done it with the four of them, and he’s the roughest when he’s mad or if he’s trying to punish you.
jake mentioned yesterday that it was a punishment. jay may have didn’t mention it, but his odd behavior was enough for you to conclude that something’s going on.
you spent the whole night thinking of what did you do wrong, backtracking over the things happened the day prior today. even no matter how hard you strain your brain, nothing pops inside your head. nothing. none.
still in trance, a new message appears on sunghoon’s chat box.
‘don’t even think of ditching me or i’ll be seriously be pissed.’ — psh.
you can imagine his brows hardly furrowed, jaw clenched and eyes cold as ice burning through his phone screen as he tap those words to send you. that was enough to make you feel scared. sunghoon’s not very nice, what more if he’s pissed off?
so before you even get deeply caught into your thoughts, you pushed yourself up from the comfort of your bed and started preparing to go meet him.
on the other hand, the sound of skates sliding through the ice and nonstop smashing of hockey sticks echoes all around the auditorium. players chants and shouts at each other as they try their best to make a score. if you aren’t too familiar with the members, you’ll think they don't belong in the same group.
but they do. it was just a normal practice session, only park sunghoon, the captain and also the team’s ace, are a little bit more worked up at the moment. his eyes dark and his moves are more aggressive than usual.
his teammates that are currently on his team in this game cheered when he made another score. ice splatters as he abruptly tried to make a stop. he pants as he removes his head gear.
“come on,” one long slide and a newbie made it near him. he was panting so bad as he raises his arms. “its just practice man.” he says towards sunghoon.
the old members looks at him in horror, giving a hint not to say anything else as sunghoon faces him with a placid look on his face.
sunghoon kept silent before advancing towards the newbie. he stared right at his face for a while before grabbing him by his shirt, jaw clenching. the other varsities panics and starts to discard his hold, but he was too strong.
“if you can’t keep up with me then that’s not my problem.” he spat and gave this chilling gaze at the newbie. the obvious fear flickers through the younger’s eyes as his mouth hangs open, unable to utter a single word.
“sunghoon! that’s enough.” thankfully, their coach arrived just in time to stop the fight.
from the chairs outside the rink, one pair of eyes watches closely. his half-lidded eyes stares lazily at the scene unfolding, totally unbothered by it. his back rests at the chair and legs crossed, conveying so much dominance.
heeseung saw how sunghoon kept his grip on his teammates uniform, clearly being stubborn. he's not even surprised. typical sunghoon who never listens and always lets his temper control him.
sunghoon gave the poor boy one cold stare before pushing him off as he lets go of his jersey. he, then slides out of the rink.
“hoon.” heeseung calls that made the younger halt his steps.
he cranes his neck and look at him with blank eyes, waiting for what his hyung is about to say. heeseung trailed his gaze from the rink towards him.
“remember not to be carried away.” he reminds him.
“i know.” he shortly replied, still feeling so heated from the practice.
“and don’t hurt her.” he says in a very low tone.
sunghoon scoffs, “i won’t.” his eyes darkens as his lips stretched into a smirk, showing off his fangs. “at least not in that way.”
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your head peeks slightly to look while the players are leaving their locker one by one. it’s been almost ten minutes since you arrived the school. as expected, there’s only a few around and the whole building is still vacant.
you’re still busy checking when the hairs on your neck raised, chills running down your spine. a presence can be felt from behind you. slowly, you craned your neck to look over your shoulder.
wide broad chest is what you saw first. you trailed your gaze upwards to see lee heeseung staring down on you with a deadpan look on his handsome face.
a light gasp escapes your lips and tries to step back once.
“u-uh,” you gulped and lowered your head to avoid looking at his eyes. “sunghoon asked me t-to meet him here.”
you have no idea why on earth are you explaining to him. it just feels right to let him know why you are currently here, early in the morning, when your class starts a bit hour later.
“i know.” he shortly replies.
of course he knew. is there something else that he doesn’t know? what you noticed from lee heeseung is that besides being a very reserved individual, he’s also very observant. if the other boys loves being the center of attention, this tall gorgeous boy prefers to be on the corner, watching.
you tried glancing if he’s still looking and after meeting his gaze for a split second, you folded and glanced away.
he sighs heavily, “you guys have at least 45 minutes until our first class starts. don’t be late.” he says under his breath and starts walking away to the direction of your building.
the further he is away from you, the more your breathing stables. something about him intimidates and makes you nervous as hell. even before you can look at him to check if he’s already far away, he talks again.
“y/n,” in a speed of light, you faced him with flushed cheeks.
“y-yeah?”
his blank eyes slightly softens, “he’s in a very bad mood. if he gets out of hand, calm him down.”
his words confused you right away. first, sunghoon’s out of mood most of the times. second, why is he saying these words like as if you know perfectly what to do?
“b-but how..?”
he kept a placid look before turning his back to start walking again, leaving with, “you know how.”
you’re left standing awkwardly. heeseung’s already gone and you haven’t moved an inch. his words echoes inside your head repeatedly. it still confusing you how there’s a hint of confidence lingering through his words.
a vibration from your phone is what snapped you back to reality.
‘come here.’ — psh.
that was your cue. without thinking twice, your feet moves like it has a mind of its own, walking and leading you towards the locker room of the ice hockey team. sunghoon’s lure.
it was quiet and slightly dark. when you made it to the far end, you saw him sat at one of the benches. his head didn’t even whip to look at your way when you arrive, like he was expecting you and nobody else.
his elbows bore on his knees as he was leaning, head hanging low.
“sunghoon?” you calls him using your soft voice.
sunghoon finally lifts his head and look at your direction. there you are. you look beautiful wearing the school uniform neatly, hair brushed and eyes staring at him with a hint of concern.
he didn’t show any reaction to his face that made you feel agitated. heeseung’s words flashes back on you, that he’s in a bad mood. it scares you even more, adding to the tension.
“why are you standing so far, doll?”
his husky voice slightly echoes inside the wide room. its just the two of you here and that thought was enough to make your heart race. his endearment for you stirs something in you. how he always love to call you doll, in a sexy and taunting way.
you trudges closer, but still keeping a safe distant.
his dark eyes burns as he run his stare over you in a very dangerous way. he looks so attractive wearing his just his sweats and a white plain t-shirt, hair still a bit damp from shower. even from a distance, you can smell his manly scent that always makes you dizzy in a good way.
“kneel in front of me.” he demands.
you can feel your knee wobbling as you make your way towards him. slowly, you kneeled down. sunghoon almost lose his mind by the sight of you like this. he almost lets out a low groan when you follow him without saying any words, complying to him. submitting.
he leans backwards, resting one hand to the bench support his weight, the other palming his hard dick. you can see the outline of his cock through his sweatpants and blood rushes to your cheeks.
“take my cock out.”
his request made you blink and look at him. this shouldn’t surprise you anymore. before you come here, you’re expecting that things can escalate like this. but the fear of one of his teammates walking on you, makes you hesitating.
“what if s-someone comes here?”
“i’ll kill them.” he says those words without hesitation that made your heart drop.
“sunghoon—”
“you know i don’t have much patience, right?” his tone stingy and the crease on his forehead tells you that he’s not very happy on you delaying him from getting his desired blow.
you decided to keep your mouth shut and slowly reaches to his pants to pull it a bit, freeing his hardened cock. it was so hard and the tip so red. the sight makes you blush even more. if someone is asked to describe sunghoon’s manhood, they will probably say that its as beautiful as he is.
“go on.” he spat.
you gulped and licked your lips once before leaning in to wrap your lips to his dick. sunghoon bit his lower lip at the feeling of your hot mouth around him. he misses this. he wanted to curse so loud and to just shove it into you, but he stopped himself from doing so.
“fuck, just like that.” he moans and tried to open his eyes so he can watch you bobbing your head, getting your pace.
he saw how your hair covers your pretty face from his view and so he raised one of his hand to gather them and hold them for you.
“i got you, baby.” he whispers that made your core twitch.
you continued bobbing your head and sucking his dick, tasting sunghoon in your mouth. it was a familiar one, something that got inside your mouth a lot of time. later on, you can feel him thrusting his hips, meeting you. he was always rough and loves abusing your throat. he doesn’t care if you gag, he would even love that.
“fuck, fuck, fuck...” he growls and roughly shove his dick inside your mouth.
“gonna use that fucking mouth.” he says, “so pretty. so so damn pretty.” his compliments rings, but you’re too occupied on sucking him good.
there’s something about the way sunghoon moans. his voice whenever you give him immense pleasure serves as music to your ears. it was so erotic and just how he utters dirty words adds up to everything.
when you feel him almost reaching his climax, you’re so ready to accept and take it all. just a couple more deep thrust, sunghoon shoots his hot cum in the depths of your throat. groaning and moaning out of pleasure.
he lets go of your hair and pants while watching you suck him dry, letting out a faint ‘pop’ as you let him go.
“let me see.” he whispers and you open your mouth to show him how you swallowed every bit of it.
“good doll.” his words sent direct tingling feeling to your core, making you rub your thighs.
“we’re not yet done.” he says and stood up from the bench. he grabbed your arm to make you stand and guided you to sit down.
“strip for me.” that familiar line again.
with trembling hands, you try to take off the buttons of your blouse. sunghoon, as a very impatient guy he is, he curses and yanked your uniform, causing some of its buttons to fly off.
“sunghoon, what the he—” your words got interrupted when he pushed your body flat to the bench, making you lay down.
“shut the fuck up.” he says rudely and hovers above you.
his hand searches for your underwear and you whimper when his finger grazes your clit. he smirks, feeling your wetness.
“so wet for me. you’re such a slut, aren’t you?” he taunts that you answered with a faint ‘no’.
you tried to look away and avoid his gaze out of embarrasment for actually getting aroused for such foul situation. he scoffed and roll his eyes before removing your panties aggressively.
“i’m going to fuck you until you’re unable to think straight anymore.” and he aligned his head on your hole.
your brows furrowed, eyes shutting tightly. he traces your slit using his head before finally sliding it all in one go, making you gasp.
“fuck, look at my cock disappearing inside you.” he said and even ask you to lift your head so to see.
he was definitely right. he is fully buried inside you, and the pleasure it too much. you feel so full with all of him. he started pulling it out, only to slide it all back in again.
“u-ugh,” you let out a moan that clicked something in him, making him rut his dick rough and fast.
“s-sunghoon,” you whimpered, lips shaking as he continues to abuse your hole. “p-please slow down.” you plead.
he didn’t listen. in fact, he acts like as if he cannot hear any of your words. he placed both of his hands on your side, face above you as he continue relentlessly fucking you. his silver necklace hangs out from his shirt and now started moving along with his movement, slightly slapping to your pretty face. his brows sexily furrowed, jaw clenching while he utters low curses.
“i’m going to fucking breed you. you want that, doll?” he asks in a taunting way that made you whimper even more.
he scoffed at how you look beneath him. trying so hard not to let out your moan, when he can clearly see how much you’re enjoying and feeling so good from how deliciously he fucks you deep.
“you already have four dicks to fuck you and you still can’t be contented? what a bad girl.” he clicked his tongue and you opened your eyes to met his. it darkens as he started to roughly fuck you.
“you just never learn.” he growls and you can see the hint of anger in his eyes.
it scared you and your hand held his arm in attempt to push him away. but he was too strong. he didn’t budge and yank your hand, dismissing any chances of stopping him.
“who’s my pretty doll?” his grin grew wider, eyes full of nothing but lust for you.
you kept your mouth shut while still looking him straight at his eyes, tears brimming your eyes. he’s dominating you from above and you look so helpless beneath him.
when he didn’t heard an answer from you, he halts his hip from rutting you that made you whine slightly. he gripped your arm tight that you’re so sure it will leave a mark later, eyes piercing.
“who’s my pretty doll, y/n?” he asks in a very low tone, like a warning.
“answer me.” he commands that sent shivers to your spine.
you whined, “m-me.”
a smirk spreads across his face and leans in to connect his red luscious lips to your swollen ones, giving you a messy kiss. a string of saliva stretches when he leans away.
“you belong to me. you belong to us.” his words with so much emphasis that you can really tell how serious he is.
“i will fucking kill whoever tries to take you.”
“sunghoon, wait...” you can see how he’s starting to move in faster pace, almost making you see stars. one of his hand moves and reaches for your neck, slightly choking you.
“hoon—”
“that fucker, who do he think he is?! he’s nobody!”
you gasp and tried to take heavier breaths, trying not to be too distracted by how much pleasure sunghoon’s dick is giving you.
heeseung’s words then flashes through your mind. he said you can calm him down. how? obviously, this is the right time to show that skill.
instead of feeling scared of him, you snaked your hand on his nape and pulled his face closer. his forehead touches yours as you glance straight to his eyes, trying hard not to roll them up due to the imminent orgasm you’re about to have.
sunghoon was caught off-guard at your action. his eyes widen while still rutting his hip deep and rough. you look so beautiful from this distance, your pretty eyes filled with tears, cheeks flushed and lips swollen. all because of him. all for him.
“i’m s-sorry.” you mumbled close to his face.
he was at daze, his movement getting slower but his thrust remains deep, reaching all the good spots of your insides. almost making you crazy. you trap your lower lip in between your teeth, getting totally distracted.
“i’m so s-sorry, hoon.” you repeat your words, this time a little bit more softer.
while your foreheads still attached, you placed a gentle kiss on his face then flash a smile.
“i’m here.” and you heaved a sigh, “i’m yours. stop being mad, please.”
and with that, sunghoon relaxes, his breathing becoming more calm and his eyes softening as they stare at you.
he leans away to drop a kiss at your forehead before connecting them again as he start fucking you roughly. he groans and kisses your lips from time to time, moaning your name along with your sweet whimpers.
“f-fuck, baby. i’m close.” he whispers.
“me t-too.”
sunghoon dicked you down even faster trying to chase that climax. he kisses you, tongue dancing with yours, salivas mixing up. both of you are unbothered, mind filled by nothing but your lust and want to release.
“shit.” he curses as he shoot his cum inside your dripping cunt, your legs starts to shake, cumming as well.
he continued sliding his cock in and out, chasing both of your highs while making out. he moves away and watched how his dick slides out of you. his stares wandered all over your body, eyes full of desires.
“i’m sorry.” he mumbles as he caress your arm that he hold too tight a while ago. it was so red, his hand left a print.
your mouth gapped in amusement. did you just heard thee park sunghoon say sorry? he’s not type to do that. and when did he ever talk in a soft tone?
“does it hurt?” he asks, using that foreign tone again.
you smiled a little, shaking your head to assure him. he stares right at your eyes for a while before dipping his head down for another kiss. your eyes shut as you accept his kisses with no complains.
the bell from the next building is what snaps you back to your senses. his kisses moves to your chin then down to your neck.
“h-hoon, its almost time for our class. we need to go back.” your fingers run through his soft hair.
you wait for him to hiss at you for actually touching it as you are well aware how sensitive he is when it comes to his hair. but none. no complain or side comments about it.
he gave you a few more pecks before finally letting you go.
“you broke my uniform.” your lips pursed while staring down.
he just finished cleaning you up and you’re making yourself look presentable when you remembered how he broke the buttons of your blouse after pulling it hardly.
sunghoon smirks and opens his locker. he retrieves a uniform then handed it to you.
“here, you can use mine.”
the boys and girl’s top uniform is pretty similar, the only difference is the girls are shorter. some even had theirs cropped to style it in their own preference.
you accepted it and removes your broken uniform. he trudges closer then gently took the blouse from your hand so you can wear his easily. his eyes watches you closely making you feel a bit shy.
he helped you wear his uniform. “thank you.” you said, blushing.
he smirks and dips his head for a quick kiss. you’re too surprised to even say anything. you’re just too shock how he's acting right now.
“let’s go. we’re already late. heeseung hyung will be pissed.” and he grabs your things to carry it himself.
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you knocked twice at your classroom when you arrived. the two of you are late and you’re silently praying the teacher's not in a bad mood today.
she cracks the door open and your homeroom teacher scans you up and down. her strict eyes watches you, eyebrow raising.
“ms. y/n. you are late.” she says.
“i’m s-sorry, ma'am.”
she was left with no choice but to let you inside. everyone’s eyes are darted at you and its very uncomfortable. your hand unconsciously plays through the edge of your uniform— more like sunghoon's. they gave you a look of curiosity. why you’re late when you’re someone never late for a class and whose uniform is that? clearly, it wasn’t yours.
before you reach your chair, you have to walk pass jake’s. his piercing and playful eyes are darted at you, grin so wide because he knew exactly where you’ve been.
“lips so swollen, sweetheart.” he stated that made you blush even more. some students who seats near him, heard it and gave you this look.
“mr. park.” is what your teacher said the moment you sat down to your chair.
when you look over the door, park sunghoon walks inside at ease. not even bothered that he’s late. his bag hangs over his shoulder while one of his hand holds yours.
“practice.” he reasoned shortly before heading your way, not even sparing your teacher a glance.
he ignored the eyes watching him and focused his stares right at you. the three other boys shrugs their shoulder off and boredly face front. jake’s smirking, jay rolled his eyes and heeseung watches carefully
sunghoon placed your things on the side of your table and leaned down to look through your eyes.
“here, baby.” he says casually then messed your hair before walking to his chair.
lips of some girls from your class are gapped open at the scene they just witnessed. they cannot believe it and wondered what’s between you and park sunghoon. they are beyond surprise and you can’t help but to just shrug it off. what more if they finds out his three other friends are involve too?
the classes continued normally, or that’s what you try to make yourself believe. the stares from your classmates are often darted at you. still not over about the scene a while ago. it was slowly getting annoying.
while writing down on your paper, you heard a chair being dragged to your side.
“hey,” your head looked over jake who just sat down.
“yeah?”
he tilts his head, “did you have fun?”
your mouth hangs open, what happened a while ago flashes back to your mind instantly because of his question. jake saw it and he grins before scoffing.
“you did.” he touches your chin to make you look up, “your face says it all.” he added and grins, masking the emotion slowly igniting inside his chest.
you gulped and licked your lips.
“j-jake,” you called him.
he raised one of his brows, waiting for what you’re going to say.
“about beomgyu...” your word halts.
the instant change on his mood just proves you that he has something to do with how the boys are treating you. his eyes turned cold, jaw clenching slightly.
“what about him?” his stingy tone rings your head.
“its not what you think—”
“jake.” both of your heads whips to the direction of the voice who called him.
lee heeseung stood by the door, watching you both with his heated gaze. his eyes shifts to yours and it sent direct chills. your head lowering as an automatic response.
“y/n, can you grab these workbooks and help me take it to the student council office?”
envious eyes darted at your direction when he ask you that. you can even hear someone commented that why should it be you. his dark gaze he gave you indicates that you have no other choice but to follow him.
you stood up, jake's eyes stayed and never left you. he watch how you walks towards the table, near his friend. jay and sunghoon seems uninterested as they bicker over something he doesn’t care at all.
“which one should i carry?” you asked heeseung.
he used his chin to point the fewer stacks of workbooks, he took the heavier stacks. he’s the first one to leave the room and you stalked behind him. students in the hallways greets heeseung with amusement through their eyes. they don’t even notice you at all. they’re too focused on him.
when you arrived the student council office, he stops beside the door then glance at you with serious eyes. your stomach churns and suddenly felt agitated.
“place those books here so you can open the door.” he instructed that you obeyed right away.
he didn’t even budge from his position when you place additional weight to what he’s carrying. totally unbothered.
you opened the door for him and hold it so it wouldn’t be on the way. he smoothly walks inside and you remained standing by door, looking at him placing it neatly at the table.
his eyes trailed towards you.
“get inside and lock the door.” he says and you saw him loosening his school tie.
you gulped and instantly felt on edge. he watch how you closed the door and he only looked away after hearing the sound of the lock clicking.
“sit down here, angel.”
angel.
you blushed so hard and its a little crazy how one word affects you so much. the somersault inside your stomach added weigh on your emotions. his heated gaze totally not helping.
“heeseung, about beomgyu...” you started.
his face remained blank. unlike jake, he didn’t show any foul mood or anything. but that slightly bothers you more. heeseung is always calm, very reserved. his mysterious demeanor pulls you more into him, digging a bigger space for your curiosity.
“it wasn’t what you guys think. i know what’s happening these days is somehow connected to him.”
he sighed heavily and tilts his head, “we already warned you and sent him a message.”
the way he talks sounded so calm. like nothing can ever make him nervous or anxious. he never stutters and speaks with so much confidence. he knows what he’s saying and that’s makes him more attractive in people’s eyes. what’s sexier than a man who knows what he wants in life?
“he just told me that he’s sorry—”
“if he’s really sorry then he should just stayed away.” he cuts you off.
you licked your lips and was about to talk again when he lets out a strained sigh.
“enough.”
“i j-just—”
“strip for me.” your mouth hangs open and stared at his eyes.
he looked serious as usual. his eyes silently conveying a message that you’ll get in trouble if you don’t obey him right away. without much of a choice, you start to take off sunghoon’s uniform.
he looked at it with no emotion and brows slightly twitched at the sight of a bruise by your arm. it doesn’t really hurt, but it was evident.
“does it hurt?” his tone full of concern.
you’re quite amused at him, blushing.
“no. don’t worry.”
“he lost control, didn’t he?” his hand reaches for it, caressing it gently like it will aid it. he looks at your eyes, waiting for your answer.
“just f-for a short time...”
he sighs and nods his head. this isn’t the time to talk or think about sunghoon’s bad temper. he tilt his chin, asking you to continue. when you’re left with your underwears he stood up then stared down at you.
“lay down on the table.”
your eyes grew big, hesitant to his request.
“won’t they come here? i thought the student body are busy today...?”
he glanced on your eyes once and it was enough to shut your mouth then do as he says. he offered his hand for assistance. his hand are warm, unlike sunghoon’s. he helped you step on a chair so you can climb on the table.
it feels so awkward sitting on it and having heeseung stand in between your thighs.
“lay down. i want to eat you.” he said so casually that made your core twitch in so much anticipation.
you wanted to curse yourself for how your body reacts to them. this isn’t how it suppose to be. you should protest and tell them off. or even get mad because you thought they’re already interested to a different girl. but... why do you find yourself laying back on the table while lee heeseung is gradually taking your panties off?
“breath, angel.” he smirks and you glanced away feeling guilty. he knew you’ve been holding your breath since you climb to this table.
the feeling of being this naked in front of heeseung is so overwhelming, both in good and bad ways.
“eyes on me.”
his command made you lift your body so you can see him dip his head and spit on your already wet pussy. you pursed your lips, doesn’t want to let out a moan.
he lifts his hand and slide one finger inside. you can feel it so long and warm.
“did he stretch you enough for me?” he whispers so close to your cunt, his hot breath fanning to your wet core.
“heeseung...”
“shh.” he glared at you then added another finger.
“god, this pussy.” he groans and leans in attaching his lips, lapping your cunt.
“heeseung..” you moaned and covers your lips, feeling shy by how you whimper. it sounded pathetic.
the feeling of his hot long tongue grazing and slightly getting inside your hole drives you crazy. your thighs automatically closes, caging his head in between.
he looks at you over his eyelashes, one hand pushed your thigh open. he leans away, “keep it open for me, angel.”
he smirks and placed a kiss on the insides of your thighs, “i know it feels so good, but i want your legs open.”
he grabbed both of your hands, making you hold your legs. you whimpered, feeling frustrated that his lips are not latched on your aching core. he glanced at you and smirks after seeing your desperation.
“patience, angel.”
he then dips his head again and started eating you. it felt so good, he was doing it expertly, making your head all fuzzy.
“oh my gosh,” you moaned and throw your head back after feeling a knot forming inside your stomach.
“i’m c-cumming,”
“really? give it to me.”
and with that you released, legs shaking and eyes tightly shut. heeseung made sure he gets all of your juices, nothing spills. you tried to open your eyes to look at him and the scene was so erotic. heeseung put his lips on your hole and suck it.
“uggh.” your eyes shuts and lips shakes in so much pleasure.
he kept sucking and gave your slit one last long lick. after that, he stood up and wiped off his chin. he looked so satisfied. he helped you get up, head still all clouded with the intense feeling he just gave you.
he then took off his clothes and went to sit down at the sofa. the same couch where jay took you yesterday. he rests his arms and watch you intensely.
“ride me.”
with wobbly legs, you walked towards him. once in reach, he slides his hand on your waist and helps you to get in position. your straddle above him, knees bore at the sofa. he hold you and watch how you reach for his hardened cock. you gave it a few strokes before placing its head near your hole.
“oohh,” you can’t help but to moan.
“slowly...” he whispers, face already on your side. his lips grazes your ears dangerously.
the lust took over you completely, taking control of your mind and actions. you are losing it, just wanted to have him deep inside you. lower lip trapped in between your teeth you slowly sat on heeseung’s long thick cock, moaning as it reaches all the right spots.
“u-uhhh,” your stretched moan made heeseung grin. satisfied at how you’re so eager to have him inside you.
“move, angel. fuck my cock into you.” he whispered full of lust like hypnotizing you.
you started riding him, at first with slow pace until you feel more desperate for him. moaning and gasping as you continued bouncing, not caring if someone from outside hear your shenanigans.
“feel so good.” you mumbled.
“oh yeah? ride faster.”
you obeyed, but your poor stamina and the overstimuation makes you feel so weak. you slump on his lap, cock buried deep inside. your head rested on his shoulder, panting.
“tired already?” he asks softly that you responded with a short nod.
he chuckles and placed a swift kiss on your cheeks. “all right. place your hand on the sofa and lift yourself a bit, angel. i will fuck you myself.”
pulling yourself together, you do as he said. eyes half-lidded drowned in your own desires. heeseung watches with a grin and kisses you once at your lips before starting to rutt his cock to your cunt, his hips moving so fast that you make you a moaning mess.
“o-oh my gosh...” and your forehead rests on his shoulder.
“my baby so weak that he needs me to fuck you myself, hmm?” he bit your earlobe once that made you whimper.
the slapping sounds of your skins so erotic. enough to make you feel the knot inside your stomach once again. your grip on the sofa tighten along with your hole, making the man under you groan in pleasure.
“cumming already?”
you nod while biting your lips so hard. he smirks and kisses you eagerly, feeling himself reaching his climax as well.
“cum with me, angel.”
with a few more hard thrusts from heeseung, you came all over his length and not long after, he follows. groaning so hard while kissing you with furrowed brows. he kept fucking his dick in you while supporting you so you won’t fall.
he pulls away to focus on sliding his cock in and out as you rest your head on his shoulder, nuzzling at crook of his neck.
“you’re such a good girl for me. for all of us.” you heard him whisper before placing a sweet kiss at your forehead.
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“okay class we will have a group research project and i want you to participate properly in your group. i don’t want to hear some complains.” your teacher in your last period said.
the class reacts and gave their own comments. some already rants, the others being happy to do a group project and even say the people they wanted to work with.
you, on the other hand is resting your head on your table. too tired to even give a care about it. thankfully, the teacher after the lunch break didn’t attend and so you had the chance to take a nap after what you and heeseung did.
the thought itself made you blush so hard.
you teacher started announcing the groups. you tried hard to listen, waiting for your name to be called.
“park jongseong, jake sim, lee heeseung, park sunghoon and (surname) y/n).”
you slowly raised your head, blinking while staring in front. confused if you heard that right. did she just call your name? whose your group mates again?
“damn, she’s so lucky. why does it have to be her?” one of your girl classmates whispered to her friend while giving you a glaring look.
you noticed that the class are now moving seats to gather around by groups. still spacing out, you glanced around. waiting for someone to call you.
jake sim then raised his hand while jay pulls a vacant chair near his. the four pairs of eyes darts at you.
“y/n, come! we’re partners!” jake says excitedly.
your mouth fell open slightly while eyeing their direction. jake’s smile is wide, jay’s smirking along with sunghoon while heeseung eyes you seriously.
‘oh no...’ you thought to yourself.
since you don’t want to be scolded by your teacher, you stood up and slowly head to their direction.
“we’re going to have so much fun...” jake stated meaningfully before winking at you.
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scoobysnakz · 10 months
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||* Maybe it's because he's safe and keeps you warm in times or need. Or maybe it's because he has those unruly salt and pepper hair and worry lines. Either way, you want him and maybe he wants you.
Maybe you don't know, or maybe you don't care. But he can smell you, the rush of dopamine when he turns his back and you can see his trapezius shining deliciously in his dimly lit room.
pt2
||* dilf!miguel, vaginal fingering, praise kink, eye contact, perv!miguel, college-age reader, lap sitting, slight hair pulling, one shot, Daddy issues, Dom/sub, smut written by a virgin, not proof read
You're young. And oblivious. So painfully oblivious.
At first, Miguel had just assumed it was a defence mechanism. Don’t give them a reaction and they’ll leave you alone. But the more you smile at the guys flirting with you, the more you lean into their non-platonic hugs, the more certain he becomes that you’re just unaware.
And- in all honesty- he's jealous. He doesn't want to feel the shame that weighs down on his shoulders each time your expression softens at his praise. He doesn't want to feel guilt for watching your hips sway as you walk away. He doesn't want to be like them but he craves the audacity to leer at you in broad daylight.
Maybe it's his morals or maybe it's because he's a coward.
Either way, you’re young and oblivious. And deep down, he loves it.
It's worse in HQ, these men are meant to have morals, good morals, and yet they treat you like a fuckdoll to the eyes.
Your perfect, untouched, college body just for them to perv at.
And Miguel hates it. He hates how he has to ignore your pretty eyes staring up at him as he talks, how he has to scold every Spiderman for being a pervert, and he hates how he's just as bad.
Maybe if you weren't so bubbly sweet he wouldn't have to spend each night palming himself to the thought of your perky body, every shower spurting his hot cum on the misty glass and every moment alone with his office with the doors locked and hand muffling his moans.
“Migs?” that nickname, that only you can use, that only you dared to think of.
He turns to face you, a lazy smile drawn across his painfully perfect lips. “Princessa?” And you immediately try to hide the blush that threatens to bloom on your cheeks.
You hold out your hands, a tray holding a ‘spidey spectacular’ on top. In reality, it's nothing spectacular- a beef burger with barbecue sauce, large fries and a medium drink.
“Got you some lunch,” you grin.
He hops down from his podium, cringing at how your body tenses at the loud thud. “Why?” his tone is harsh, cold, forced.
He knows why. You care, you check in on him when no one else does, you randomly ask him if he's drinking more water than coffee that day, if he actually went to sleep the night previous- unknowing to the thoughts of you that kept him up.
“You haven't eaten today,” you stick your arms out, a playful smile on your face and he doesn't ask how you know. You just do, “and you can't capture those nettlesome anomalies on an empty stomach!”
He quirks an eyebrow. “Nettlesome?”
You laugh, a soft one that makes his core ache with need. “My literature professor has permanently engrained fancy words into my brain.” your shocking professor. Probably some perv who keeps you behind to help you with your tests and oggles at your perfectly shaped ass when you bend over to pick up a pen.
And a painful reminder that as mature as you may be, you’re still young. 18 years too young.
He takes the burger from the tray, gaze lingering on the second as he tries to decide if it's for him or not.
“I’m eating with you,” you answer his question without him asking.
“No, princessa.”
You huff at him, soft, rounded lips falling into a pout. It's a habit you've made- bringing him lunch and sitting with him to make sure he's actually eating the food you've bought no matter how hard he protests.
“Fine. I won't eat with you, I'll just sit and stare and probably piss you off,” you smile smugly at him.
“Whatever,” he grumbles, turning away from you and throwing the paper from the burger in the bin.
You hum in response, not even caring for his grouchy attitude because it doesn't bother you. Because you're young, and you don't understand how men work yet.
He pulls himself up to his podium, glowing red webs dangling from the large metal disk where you soon follow.
Maybe you don't know, or maybe you don't care. But he can smell you, the rush of dopamine when he turns his back and you can see his trapezius shining deliciously in his dimly lit room.
You pull yourself close to him, hand resting just between his thigh and yours. So soft and delicate and he wants to ruin the innocence within them. Wants to see your dainty fingers wrapped around his cock, wants to see how you use those digits inside of yourself while- hopefully- thinking of him.
“How’s school?” he feels like an awkward uncle at an even more awkward Christmas party. Is this what it's come to? Him having to ask about your college life because that's your main focus because you’re young… er.
A small scoff escapes you, and you immediately cover up with a cough.
“I’m not seven,” you tease, hand held out to shove him but you immediately withdraw it which makes him frown.
“You look it.” it's your turn to frown.
You blink up at him, wondering if he knows how you crave these sweet moments between the two of you. You hate how dependent you've become on him, how you can't get through the day without thinking of him and using his health as an excuse to come see him.
“You’re an ass,” you fold your arms across your chest, nose scrunching in feigned irritation.
Miguel clicks his tongue at you, head cocking to the side in disapproval. “Language, princessa.”
You mutter a feeble “sorry”, a forced waver to your voice that makes him chuckle lightly.
You turn your head to face him, his dark, almost curls illuminated by the neon orange of his numerous monitors. His eyes meet yours, deep maroon paralysing you in place, peeking fangs slowing your breathing, chiselled features pinking your cheeks.
And you smile. A sickly sweet, beautifully innocent smile. Any other person would look away, grow red with shame, and maybe say something embarrassing. But you? You just smile.
Because you're painfully naive.
You blink up at him, wondering if he knows how you crave these sweet moments between the two of you. You hate how dependent you've become on him, how you can't get through the day without thinking of him and using his health as an excuse to come see him.
“Really?” you turn your head to face him, neck craned back so he gets a perfect view of your soft skin. “Do I look seven?”
Of course, you don't look seven. You look twenty, which you are. But you're mature and not in a creepy way. No one else would think twice about seeing if he's okay, and no adult would have their panties organised by colour like you do either.
The sound of his chewing eventually fills the bleak room. You can see him looking straight ahead through your peripheral.
“No.”
“A man of few words,” you grin.
“A girl of far too many.”
You aren't a girl. You’re a woman. You don't spend time chasing boys, you enjoy literature, and you have your whole life planned out. Kids don't do the things you do. Kids don't want a life with a decent man, with him.
“School’s boring,” you cut through the silence, voice soft, quiet, shy.
Relief washes over him like the first rainfall in the Sahara. He swallows- quickly, and brings his attention back to you- not that it ever really left you.
“It shouldn't be, you're smart, princessa, and if your professors are doing their job you should be engaged with their subjects,” he hates that he sounds so parental and demanding when he speaks to you but it's like a default setting. He expects the best from you because he knows you can achieve it.
You scoff and this time you don't bother hiding it at all. “Thanks,” you mutter dryly, “I’ll keep being smart and then school will be more exciting.”
He grimaces at your dull tone. He's used to your sparkly side, the smiles and the giggles and now you're acting your age, all attitude and sarcasm.
“That’s not what I meant,” he groans, his voice harsher than before.
“What did you mean then, Miguel?” you press on.
“I meant that you're smart enough to entertain yourself, unlike other people.”
And in its own strange way, his ‘complisult’ makes you smile. He sees who you are, that you aren't some immature child.
It feels nice not being viewed as a child for once. A slow, steady warmth travels through you. He's being nice to you, not a rare occurrence but uncommon enough to mean something.
Slowly, you edge your hand closer to his, fingers gently nudging against his own. You pause for a moment, knowing you’re pushing it and waiting for his reaction but when he doesn't pull away you give his hand a squeeze.
“Thanks,” your gentle voice making his cock harden beneath his suit, “in its own way, that was sweet.”
And you grin at him again. Soft lips beaming up at his plain expression as he tries not to think about how badly he needs some relief.
Against his better judgment, he squeezes your hand back. And the soft, nervous, almost squeak that escapes you makes it all worthwhile.
“It’s true. When I went to your universe,” not to jack off while you shower, “I saw your study notes. You work hard, princessa, and it's good, admirable,” hot.
All your life you be craved words so sweet. Someone to tell you that all those years of dedication to being the best and coming second is too, better than good. Someone to tell you that when they saw your study notes they didn't see you as dumb you have to revise but studious enough to want the best.
You don't even think twice about him being in your universe, just putting it down to an anomaly or another perfectly innocent reason.
He can smell it again, that dopamine rush. You pull yourself closer to him, taunting him unknowingly and let your head rest on his shoulder.
You do this often, allow yourself to lean against him, intertwine your fingers with his, plant endearing kisses to his stubbly cheeks when he helps you out. And you do it so secretly that it's almost sexual but the innocence you perform these acts with makes it feel painfully platonic.
All he can do is ride out this moment of pure torment. Cock stiff and thighs burning.
Deep down he knows he shouldn't be like this, savouring your innocence that he can so easily capture on cameras he can use later. You're so pure, sacred almost, that it feels wrong to even have his arms wrapped around your waist.
“Migs?” that nickname that only you get to use because if he gets to call you princessa its only fair.
Your hand slips off of his and moves to rest on his thigh. “Migs?” you say a little louder this time. He hums dully.
“Princessa?”
Sometimes you wonder if he knows how wet his voice makes you. The low rumble that passes through his chest, the silky smooth movements of his lips, the slight tinge of an accent that makes your cunt flutter.
You let your thumb travel over the ridges of his fingers, smooth over the peaks of his knuckles.
His hand is so big compared to yours, something that the two of you haven't ignored.
He wonders how the rest of you feels, past the tight lycra of your suit as it covers your wrists, against the fresh cotton of his bedsheets, flush against his chest.
The dull humming of the monitors accompanied by your heavy breathing and the subtle whirring of the random machinery warms up the silence between the two of you.
You shift yourself to face him, pretty lips pursed and brow furrowed.
Maybe it's because he's so safe right now. Or maybe it's because you failed your paper and his praise is all you need. But he looks painfully handsome.
Broad shoulders rising and falling with every breath. Soft lips parted in hunger. The sea of deep sepias and carmines that is his eyes.
Miguel has always been there for you. Well, maybe not always, but often enough. Your roommates being assholes? You can sleep at HQ. Suit ripped? He’ll make you a new one.
And in this moment, you can't see past that. He may be older, grey strands peppering his umber locks and worry lines framing his features, but that doesn't matter.
So you lean up close to him, faces inches apart. Just to smell him, just to see him, just to be near him, just to feel him.
He flinches at first, brow furrowed and eyes narrowed. His gaze runs up and down your figure, trying to figure out what you're doing, your innocent expression leaving far too much up for interpretation.
For a moment the two of you just stare at each other, arousal burning white-hot in your core and bodies thrumming with desire.
A calloused hand moves to cup your cheek and pull you closer. Miguel lets out a low sigh, hot breath tickling your face and making your nose scrunch in a way that can only be described as perfect.
Your breathing slows and your heart hammers. He's so close, soft lips just within reach.
“Can I?” his voice is almost a croak, a desperate plea.
He can't tear his eyes away from your quivering lips. He wants to feel them against his own, taste you, have your mouth in his possession.
You don't get time to finish your feeble “please” before he's pressing his lips against yours.
It's soft at first, the two of you gradually warming to the sensation of each other. But when you let out a soft sigh something inside him switches. All morals and guilt go completely out the window and his senses are filled with you.
His tongue probes hungrily at your lips, seeking access to the warmth of your mouth and you happily agree. His hands slide down to your hips, fingertips pressing into the soft flesh crudely hidden beneath your suit.
“Need you,” you groan, hands gripping his chest with desperation. He silences you with another kiss, tongue immediately attacking yours, too impolite, too hard, too impatient to wait for your sanction.
He's blinded by lust, a desire that's been building up inside him for too long. His arm snakes to the small of your back, protruding talons catching on the material of your suit. He pulls you into his lap and you nearly gasp at the sensation of his erection brushing against your clothed cunt.
You lean back slightly so you can look at him, chest rising and falling with each pant. “Say something,” you pout, his mutism making your head swarm with confusion, “let me hear your voice.”
The neediness of your tone makes him smile, a boyish, cheeky one that makes your stomach flutter.
“What do you want me to say?” he questions, fingers tracing up and down the bridge of your spine.
“Just… talk me through it,” you pause, cunt fluttering and thighs tensing, “it’s my first time,” you admit quietly. Your cheeks flush with embarrassment. It's something you've never admitted, viewing virginity as a burden more than the blessing men do.
“Who said I'm gonna fuck you?”
Oh.
You purse your lips, your smile faltering and skin prickling with embarrassment as you fidget on his lap. His cock strains against his suit, hips threatening to buck up when you unintentionally grind against him.
You look down and a smirk forms on your face. You press the heel of your palm against his erection, eyes widening with arousal at the whine that escapes him. “This did.”
You swear that for a moment you can see a glint of red in his eyes, much darker, meaner, than his usual cool mahogany.
“Don't,” he grunts, hand gripping your wrist.
The excited grin on your face brings him back. He can't do this to you. He can't take your innocence, be the one to steal what makes you so pure. He's done things he's ashamed of, killed, lied, hated. He isn't deserving of the sweet bliss that’s you.
Your lips fall into a disappointed pout. Have you done something wrong? Maybe you’ve been too eager?
“I… I'm sorry?” you pose your apology as a question, unsure of what's actually going on. You’re inexperienced but this… this isn't normal.
“No, mierda, no, princesa,” and his hands back on your cheek, thumb tracing over the curve of your vermillion. “No digas lo siento.” your brow furrows in confusion but he doesn't elaborate.
He wants to ruin you, corrupt your pretty pussy with his hot cum and watch it seep out in think dribbles before he can stuff it back in with his fingers. But he can't.
That sweet innocence in your eyes, lashes fluttering with arousal from a simple kiss. He can't do this to you.
“Look at me,” he commands and on instinct, your eyes meet his.
“Good Girl,” he croons.
“I'm confused, Migs,” you push his hand off your cheek softly, head cocked to the side, “you’re confusing me.”
He brings a hand to your cunt and he cups it, the heel of his palm digging into your cunt. “Let me do this instead, hmm?” you nod in agreement, head too fuzzy with the strange mixture of arousal and bewilderment to even process the jolt of pleasure that shot down your spine.
The sound of ripping draws your attention down to your arousal-slick folds but he clicks his tongue. “Eyes on me, chica,” his tone is slightly harsher now but his eyes are still warm.
You don't know what he's doing. If he's coming or going. If he's teasing you or allowing this to go further.
“Mi-” he presses his index finger to your lips, not that he needed more than his intense gaze to silence you.
“You said this is your first time?” you nod again.
“No one else has touched you?” his fingers part the tear in your suit, your damp panties on show for him.
“No one.”
His thumb starts to slowly circle your cotton-clothed clit eliciting a soft gasp from you.
“Do you want me to touch you, princessa?”
Your fingers dig into the muscle of his thighs but he doesn't flinch. A sharp talon nips at your weeping bud and you nearly cry. It sends a jolt of pain fused with sickly sweet pleasure coursing through your veins. “Asked you a question didn't I?”
You nod your head again, not knowing how to answer.
“Use your words.”
Your cunt is dribbling its juices all down your thighs- and he can smell it. His mouth is practically drooling at the scent it your arousal. He's trying so hard not to rip your suit all the way and split you open with his cock. But you're gentle, soft, sweet, delicate. So he has to be as well.
Taking a shaky, deep breath, you nod your head again, “I want you to touch me, Miguel.”
“Muy bein, princessa,” his thumb slips under the waistband of your panties and comes to rest on your clit but he doesn't stimulate you. Just leaves it resting on the hardened nub.
You whine at the lack of friction, hips trying to grind against his hand but his free hand holds you down.
“Migs, please,” you know you sound pathetically needy but you don't care. The man you've been lusting after since he first recruited you has his hand in your pants.
“Then keep looking at me,” he instructs, “wanna see your pretty face. Can you do that for me?” he grins at the twitching in your cunt caused by his words. That's all the confirmation he needs.
His thumb begins its slow pattern around the hood of your clit while his other hand rests on your waist, keeping you planted firmly on his lap. And maybe so you can feel how big he is.
His hands are surprisingly gentle. You've seen him kill before, seen the plethora of blood he can draw from someone with one fell swoop. Yet he's always been so careful with you, right now being no exception. Maybe that's what’s drawn you to him, the idea of him viewing you as something so sacred that he can't bring himself to damage your fragile body.
The tedious speed he's using is purposefully slow. He wants to draw this out for as long as possible, keep you a squirming mess on his lap, your sweet nectar running down to his thighs. But you want more; you’re too shy to ask for it but you want it.
You press your lips to his again, tongue slipping into his mouth almost sloppily. He's taken aback at first by your sudden burst of confidence but he doesn't protest. The hand that was resting in your hip moves to the back of your head to press you deeper into the kiss.
You whine hungrily and he rewards you with a faster pace. Your thighs clench around him, not actually expecting your plan to work. Your eyes flutter for a moment but he grips your chin, forcing you to keep looking at him.
“Princessa, I'll stop,” his warning is heed enough.
Your mind’s a foggy blur of arousal and pure bliss. He keeps toying with your clit, slowing down when your gaze falters but speeding up and rewarding you if you've kept eye contact.
“Please, I'll be good, so good for you,” you mewl, craving his kind words of praise again.
“Will you? Will you let me see those pretty lips of yours smile so sweetly for me while I make you feel good?” you nod your head excessively, mumbled “yes I will”’s and “good for you”’s spilling from your lips.
The hot coil of pleasure tightens with each flick of his distal. More and more sweet moans spew from your loose hanging mouth which are just music to his ears. Your leaky hole clenches around nothingness but you're too shy to ask for more. Miguel’s thumb is good enough but what you really crave is that hard cock that's pushing up against your stomach.
Soft, sticky clicking sounds mellow in the warmth of the rooms atmosphere, arousal blending in smoothly along with the scent of your nearing climax. He can sense it, your hips stuttering and your nails digging into the meat of his chest. But he can't let you go just yet.
“Hold it for me,” its a command, not a request.
You bite your lower lip, eyes nearly watering as you try you hardest to hold back. Your poor cunt throne needily while it continues to pump hot juices all over his hand. “I-I don't know how,” you blubber, thighs trembling and hands twitching.
Your body runs white hot with pleasure while your mind teeters on the edge of climax.
“I know you can, be a good girl, princessa,” he pressed earnestly, two-toned lips falling into that signature smirk.
You let your head come to rest in the crook of his neck. He flinches at the warmth of your breath and grabs the back of your hair roughly. You whine at the sharp tug but don't protest further.
“Fuck did I tell you ‘bout looking away?” his voice is almost harsh but you don't care. Your whole body is tingling with so much euphoria, blood pumping hot with pleasure, that you don't even care about his talon catching on your clit.
You’re so close to cumming, to reaching that paradise he's dangling in front of you like a carrot on a stick. “Let me, I-i can't, Migs.”
He frowns.
Once you're done that's it. He has to let you go, push off his lap and keep you at arm's length. But he can't bring himself to do that, get rid of your warmth and tiny frame.
“Migs? Please, let me…” you cut yourself with a silent moan.
Your mouth falls slack, eyes widening for a moment before fluttering closed. Warmth washes over you, trickling down your spine like honey from a jar. And for a moment you think you've gone deaf because Miguel’s lips are moving but you can't figure out what he's saying.
Your arousal spills from your cunt and all the way down his hands in a warm, blanketing trinket of your pleasure.
He clicks his tongue in disappointment but lets you ride out your high with his thumb remaining on your pussy.
“Fuck,” you breathe, voice cracking in a way that only makes his cock harden.
“Mmmm, did my princessa enjoy herself?” you look up at him, eyes glazed over with lust.
Your orgasm took enough energy for you to be exhausted now. You can barely lift your head let alone reply to him. When you try to smile your eyes just roll back slightly, your lashes fluttering and your nose scrunching.
You’ve come before, plenty of times, but this feels different. This time it feels all warm and gooey like it's going to stick to you forever. Maybe it's because it's Miguel’s fingers instead of your own toying with your cunt or maybe it's because you got to hold onto him. Either way, you've just cum all over his hands and can't form a proper sentence now.
Miguel smiles down at you, revelling in your blissed-out expression. Knowing that he's drawn this pleasure from you makes his insides churn.
“Pretty Girl,” he coos, hand smoothing your spine, “so pretty for me, hmm? Cumming just from me playing with her pretty pussy.” as if to prove a point, he spreads your sticky folds open with his thumb two middle fingers, a soft gooey sound catching your attention.
“Wonder if your cunt is just as pretty?” be slides a harsh finger inside with a grunt, eliciting a sharp gasp from you, “want me to fuck your tight hole, princessa?”
And you nod. Too fucked out, too tired, too needy, too in love with him without either of you knowing it yet, to push him away.
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literaryavenger · 5 months
Text
Obsessed
Summary: Your crush on Bucky may be getting out of control.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader
Warnings: Dramatic Reader. Language. Angst. Fluff. My poor attempts at being Funny.
Word Count: 1.4K I'm physically incapable of making anything short.
A/N: I wrote this in like 2 hours and I don't even know what this is, just... Yeah.
Masterlist
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This is terrible.
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to you.
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone. It's just the most horrible, dreadful, awful thing that could’ve ever happen to yo-
“Would you stop staring at him for fuck's sakes!” Natasha's hissed words make your eyes snap to her and finally away from the metal armed Supersoldier lifting weights. Shirtless.
You don't know when Bucky stopped feeling self-conscious enough to allow him to workout in nothing but a pair of gym shorts, but it has become literal torture for you.
Needless to say, Bucky's current level of undress is making it impossible for you to concentrate on the stretching you're supposed to be doing before your sparring match with Natasha.
But your very thoughtful and not at all exasperated friend makes sure to keep your attention on her during the entirety of our match by thoroughly kicking your ass.
What a lovely best friend you have.
Anyways.
Your entire mood shifts with one not intentionally overheard conversation. Steve enters the gym and goes straight to Bucky, who was putting his weight set down.
“She’s here!” Is all the blonde says to his friend and your heart stops at the way Bucky’s face lights up with a smile, not needing any more information before following Steve out of the gym.
She’s here? Who the fuck is she? Does Bucky have a girlfriend? And most importantly, she’s here? In the Compound?
Natasha can almost see the gears turning in your brain as you make no attempts to move from the mat after she knocked you on your ass for the hundredth time today. You didn’t even seem to notice her hand offering you help to get up, your eyes still looking where Bucky was just a moment ago, staring at nothing in particular while your brain drowns in your overthinking.
Natasha sighs and decides to end the match here, kneeling down in front of you and placing her hands on your shoulders, shaking you gently to snap you out of it.
“Don’t overthink this.” She tells you when she’s sure she has your attention. “It’s probably just a friend visiting.” She tries to comfort you, but you both know that’s highly unlikely. 
Bucky has no other friends outside the team. He doesn’t know how to talk to civilians anymore after everything he’s been through, and gave up trying to after the hundredth time he saw fear in a person’s eyes just by recognizing him. So his friend circle now includes the team and the agents of SHIELD that are not intimidated by him. Point is, every friend he has already lives in the Compound.
So who the fuck is here just to see him? 
Natasha can see that this is a lost battle, your eyes barely concentrating on her as you start drowning in your mind again. All she can do when you’re like this is try to distract you and keep you out of your head. So she takes your hand and helps you up, leading the way to the common room to watch one of your beloved romcoms together, because that’s how much she loves you.
Big mistake.
“Y/N! Y/N!” The excited high-pitched voice came just seconds after you set foot in the common room. And that’s about the only warning you got before the excited 5-year-old jumped on you, your reflexes thankfully quick enough to catch her.
“Hi, Maguna!” You say while chuckling as the little girl hugs you. “You seem excited today. Did you get into the sugar cabinet again?”
Morgan giggles at your joke and shakes her hand before taking your face in her little hands and dramatically saying, “No! A princess came to visit uncle Bucky! A real princess.”
You frown, confused at what she’s talking about, before you look around the room and finally notice everyone else in it. Pepper and Tony are on the couch, looking at you lovingly as you interact with their daughter.
You love Morgan, she’s like a little sister. You never miss an opportunity to babysit her and you spend as much time with her as you can. She also loves you, out of all the Avengers you’re her favorite, much to everyone’s dismay. She calls them all ‘aunt’ and ‘uncle’, but you’re just Y/N. You’re her big sister, you don’t need a title. Which is why you're the only one other than Tony allowed to call her 'Maguna'.
Then you notice the other people in the room: Steve, Bucky and… Shuri. The fucking Princess of Wakanda, standing in the common room of the Avengers Compound and just smiling at you as you carry Morgan.
You’ve never met Shuri, but you know she played an important part in deprogramming the Winter Soldier out of Bucky, and you’re grateful to her for it. She’s important to Bucky, and you can’t believe you forgot Bucky has Wakandan friends.
You put Morgan down on the ground again and the little girl takes your hand and aggressively steers you towards where Steve, Bucky and Shuri are standing, clearly thrilled to be in the presence of a real life princess.
“Hi, I’m Shuri.” She offers you her hand when you get close enough and you shake it with your free hand while introducing yourself.
There’s a bit of an awkward pause and you’re about to say the first thing that pops into your head when Morgan thankfully saves you by pulling on your hand, making you look at her. She tells you to come close and, chuckling, you kneel beside her so she can whisper conspiratorially in your ear.
“She’s a princess and she’s really pretty, but I still like you better.” She whispers and you can’t help but laugh.
God, you love this little girl.
You smile brightly at her and launch a tickle attack, her adorable giggles filling the room as everyone looks at you two with warm smiles.
Your attention is solely on Morgan, until you unintentionally hear the whispered conversation between Shuri and Bucky.
“So, this is the girl, huh? She’s pretty.” Shuri says and your heart skips a beat. 
You glance at them as discreetly as you can while still tickling Morgan, only to find Bucky looking at someone behind you. You turn around less carefully and see Sharon just entered the room, and she's also looking at Bucky with a smirk. You quickly return your attention to Morgan, but your mind is going a thousand miles a minute.
Of course he’d like someone more like Sharon. She’s pretty, she’s talented, she’s a total badass and she’s not afraid to go after what she wants.
She’s not a mass of anxiety in the shape of a woman that overthinks everything and becomes a flustered mess every time she’s even near Bucky.
It’s time to admit it to yourself: Bucky just doesn’t see you like that and you need to move on. 
Natasha is right, your obsession with Bucky needs to end.
What you don’t see is Bucky almost glaring at Sharon because he knows damn well why she’s smirking. She came in just before Shuri whispered to Bucky, when he was very intent on looking at you with heart eyes as you played with Morgan.
Just before you looked at him, Bucky noticed Sharon and he had to hold in a groan at her because he knows that she’s never gonna let him live this down.
Both Sharon and Steve have tried really hard to convince Bucky that you like him back and he should make a move on you. But Bucky, being as stubborn as they come, never believes them.
He obviously makes you uncomfortable, you’re always stuttering when he’s around and you avoid eye contact whenever possible. He’s just glad that you can stand his presence enough for the two of you to work together when necessary and to hang out with the rest of the team without problems.
So he just enjoys looking at you from a distance. He loves watching you play with Morgan and his thoughts always run wild with images of you playing like that with kids that are yours and his.
But he knows that’s never going to happen. Why would you like a damaged, PTSD ridden soldier that can’t even make it through the night without waking up from a nightmare? No, that’s definitely not your type.
Bucky accepts the truth: He doesn’t deserve you and you don’t see him like that anyways. 
It doesn’t matter that Sam thinks he’s obsessed, that won’t stop him from looking at you whenever he’s lucky enough to get a glimpse of his little ray of sunshine.
Requested taglist: @vicmc624 @matchat3a @nerd-without-a-cause @sapphirebarnes @cjand10 @mostlymarvelgirl @julvrs @blackhawkfanatic @lillianacristina @armystay89 @imdoingbetternow @spookyparadisesheep @elizalexwil @aceofhearts25 @dontworryboutitsweetheartxx-blog @justab-eautifulmess @buggy14 @thedonswife13
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will-o--the-wisp · 8 months
Text
smut under the cut // MDNI
gojo satoru x bottom male!reader smut
cw: amab reader, omegaverse, mpreg, breeding kink, anal sex, knotting, tba.
“Satoru?” (Name) asks, struggling to get the words out from the combination of the rough thrusts and his legs pressed into his chest. “‘S your rut coming early?” 
It’s true that he’s going at it harder than normal, Gojo admits. He has both of his partner’s legs in a steel hold, the sound of skin slapping harshly resonating through the room. He leans down a bit to capture the other man's lips in his, kissing him desperately. 
Seeing (Name) today wearing the cute frilly apron Geto gifted him as a joke while he cooked for the both of them had been the beginning of Gojos unraveling. He had spent the day at school trying to teach the kids while his thoughts were plagued by images of (Name). (Name) in the cute little apron and nothing else, (Name) as a househusband, (Name) on his cock, (Name) pregnant. It had been a shock to Gojo’s system when he imagined that, having to take a step back from his thoughts preserve his sanity for the rest of the day. 
“Wanna get you pregnant” Gojo growls, his pace not faltering for a second “You’d look so good full of my kids, fuck, all pretty ‘n cuddly for me” He revels in the way (Name)s spine curves, as if the thought is as appealing to the other as it is for him. 
“Yes fuck, Satoru yes” Whimpes fall out of the smaller man’s mouth like a prayer, eyes slowly unfocusing as the pleasure takes over his brain. Gojo is hitting all of the spots he knows the other enjoys, pistoning into the gummy walls as they contract around his dick. 
“You’re gonna come for me?” Satoru asks moving one of his hands to wrap around his lover’s dick, jerking it quickly “I’ll fill you up nicely, so don’t worry about anything else, sweetheart” He smirks as he sees tears flow down his beloved's face, pushing himself to thrust faster. 
Gojo feels the base of his dick swell, his knot making itself known by rubbing at the other’s hole, making (Name) scream nonsensically, mind given over to pleasure as they come around the stretch.   
“S’ okay sweetheart” Gojo caresses his lover's sweaty face as he cums, filling him to the brim. 
Maybe they should do it some more today, just to be sure the pregnancy takes.
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milo-is-rambling · 9 months
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Me vs outlining a perfect plan for my day in my head which I can be the only one allowed to change the schedule vs my mom asking me to do 2 simple tasks
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#she was like hey can you take the trash out I was like ughhhh okay yeah give me a min (I was still ordering weed)#my mom less than a minute later : hey if you want to break down all the cardboard out there I’d appreciate it Me: actually I’d rather not I#was about to shower right after I put this weed order in#then she gets all pissed at me bc I never do what she asks and blah blah blah blah blah#like. girl. I know she can’t see in my brain but I was not awake last night watching cleaning videos and psyching myself up for a day full#of cleaning my room and showering and doing laundry and cleaning funks cage and doobs cage and making my bed and dusting my ceiling fan and#taking apart my box fan to clean it and cleaning the water pitcher in the fridge and deep cleaning#like GAH I HAVE SO MANY PLANS TODAY WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DO NOTHING AND JUST SIT ON MY ASS SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP#ripping my hair out and screaming banging my fists on the floor#I literally was like yeah I’ll take the trash out no I will not break down boxes right now and she went off on a whole fucking thing like#just shut up.#I hate it. why do I make plans in my head of the exact order I have to do things and if one person suggest doing anything differently or#pushing my schedule back further than I wanted to myself I get so annoyed I explode into a ball of flames#I wanted to shower dry off pick up weed let out funk refill the humidifier clean the bathroom mirrors throw sort and clean the bathroom#shelves sweep start a load of laundry clean off my desk which means cleaning and organizing my closet or my desk dresser thing to fit the#crap on my desk and I have to clean and reorganize the space next to my desk so I can fit my boombox there bc the humidifier took its place#next to funk and like I want to just cry why does everything have to be so fucking difficult for me why is everything simple for everyone#else and for me every simple task is composed of one million baby tasks that I have to do in the correct order forever or everyone around m#will think I’m stupid and dumb forever like WHAT THE HELL WHY IS IT SO EASY FOR EVERYONE ELSE IN MY LIFE WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU JUST DO THING#IN WHATEVER ORDER AND IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT DO YOU MEAN A 20 MINUTE SETBACK DOESNT COMPLETELY RUIN YOUR DAY#AHHHHHHHHHH I WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT#BUT INSTEAD. I WILL GO TAKE THE TRASH OUT. AND NOT BREAK DOWN THE CARDBOARD BC THAT MEANS GETTING MY KNIFE AND MY HEADPHONES AND PUTTING MO#CLOTHES ON WHICH IS COUNTERINTUITIVE#TO THE WHOLE ABOUT TO TAKE A SHOWER THING#UGHHHHHHH#I am the worst human on the planet and I deserve infinite suffering#fuck this whole thing I’m pissed I’m gonna listen to music and rage clean after I pick up weed and shower
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strawb3rrystar · 7 months
Note
I got very sad with "Hazbin Hotel characters longing for you."
(┬┬﹏┬┬)
so you could do their reaction to I love you or us wanting to get back to them.
\( ̄︶ ̄*\))
Hazbin Hotel characters reaction to 'I love you'.
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Pairing: Charlie Morningstar, Vaggie, Angel Dust, Husk, Sir Pentious, Alastor, Lucifer Morningstar, Adam, Vox, Valentino, Velvette x GN! Reader
Warnings: None!
Word count: 482
✰Masterlist
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Charlie's face immediately lights up when you say it for the first time. She'll give a little squeal as she embraces you, squeezing the afterlife out of you.
"I love you too, my little fire bug!"
Vaggie takes a second to process what you just said. But afterward, she'll get all flustered that you said that. If you ask her what's wrong, she'll just shake her head and respond with.
"Nothing.. it's just.. I love you too."
Angel Dust thinks you're joking at first, because he finds it to be unbelievable that someone could actually love him. But once he realizes you're telling the truth he'll question why someone like you loves someone like him.
"Me? Are you sure? Well, of course I love you too, it's just.. ah- nevermind."
Husk will freeze and probably drop the glass that he's cleaning. Something in his brain just short circuits when you say it. If you hug him, or touch him at all afterwards, he will purr, but will also 100% deny that he is.
"Purring? No, you're just hearing things.."
Sir Pentious will have an internal freak out, but will also get extremely giddy. Like he'll flap his hands while trying not to slither out of the room.
"Yes.. yes. Me too! I mean.. uh- I love.. you too..?"
Alastor will think you're talking to someone else and will probably ignore you. He simply can't wrap his head around the idea of someone having romantic feelings for him. If you say it a second time, thinking he didn't hear you, he'll respond with.
"No, my dear, I heard you perfectly well the first time. I must apologize for having no interest in this conversation."
Lucifer will be extremely flattered that you love him. Of course, he still loves Lilith very dearly. But, he's also just a lonely, single, dad who deserves to be loved as well.
"Of course I love you too! Never doubt that fact for a second."
Adam is always very flirty, so he isn't surprised that you love him. He will get really cocky about it though, so maybe knock some sense into him first.
"Ha! Of course you love me! I'm fucking Adam!"
Vox will probably actually short circuit or just get really flustered. Since he's never received a proper confession before, he doesn't know how to respond.
"Mhm. Yep!" *gives you a thumbs up and an awkward smile*
Valentino on the other hand, is very used to receiving love confessions. In fact, they are an ego boost for him. He'll probably kiss the back of your hand and reply with.
"I love you too, darling~"
Velvette will give you a smile and a kiss on the cheek, then will tell you that she reciprocates the feeling. She'll probably tweet about it afterwards, though.
"@Velvvette: my lovely partner just told me they love me today!! Love u 2 <3"
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Star's notes -> My last HH headcanons got 1000 notes in three days. Yall are insane, thank you so much <33
(Thank you, sweet anon, for requesting!) (Requests are open!)
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Taglist -> @corruptcoder @astrolovedy @alexandria-fandom @perfectlycraftychaos @stressedbleach @idontreallyexistyet | Join the taglist
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Sentimentality
It’s been a while since I’ve written and posted anything so here it is. I swear Sylus has not left my mind since I started playing.
Anyways here’s a little Sylus reassurance when you’re having doubts!
Warning: kisses, light teasing, uh implied cunnilingus that’s about to start at the end
If you prefer AO3 here!
Divider by cafekitsune
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There had been a somewhat heavy feeling in your chest that you’ve been ignoring. You’re not sure where that weight is coming from or better yet— that insecurity . Does he really want you for the long run? It seems like it, and though mischievous with his words, he is very forward with his words and action. 
“Sylus, if something happened to me, what would you do?” You ask sprawled out on his bed while he’s getting ready for his meeting. In your mind it sounded like a simple enough question. Honest curiosity laces your tone. His hands suddenly stop, shirt only halfway done. Sylus’s face scrunches up in disgust at the thought of it. Before turning to face you, he makes sure to relax his facial features. “Are you planning to go away, kitten? Any mission worrying you?” disguising his worry in an almost casual tone “want me to tag along? You know I’ll go with you. Just ask, sweetie.”You're still looking up at the ceiling. Arms resting by your side lost in thought. “Hhhmm, just asking. I guess.”Sylus has moved to the foot of the bed, grabbing you by your ankles – pulling you towards him. Surprised by his actions you let out a startled yelp. He’s not sure what’s going on through your head, and he’s not sure how to ask you. While he might be brass, always getting straight to the point there’s something a little off about you today. Your smile isn’t quite reaching your eyes, not as talkative, lost in your own little world. So, he wants to make sure you truly understand and believe his words over all else. 
Dropping your legs at the edge of the bed so he’s able to stand between them he slowly bends down. Caging your body under his to stop you from getting away. His piercing gaze unsettles you for a second, leaving you frozen in place. In a flash his crimson eyes soften, filling with such a warmth that makes you feel like a soothing balm has been poured over the cracks in your heart. “I’d set the entire world on fire and spend the rest of eternity searching for any trace of you in those ashes.”  — He speaks in earnest, deep voice sounding hoarse. Words spoken slowly and low, as if he’s telling the secrets of the universe.  Secrets meant to be kept between you and the four walls of this room. Cupping your cheek with one hand while shifting his body weight on the other to not lose eye contact with you; he adds “Nothing, no one will ever take you away from me. Not the heavens or me getting lost in the nine circles of hell can rip me away from you. I will always search for you and I will always find you.”Lost for words all you manage out is a shaky breath. all as a response. If there’s one thing Sylus is, it is honest. This is something you know, but the profoundness of his words stun you. You feel like your brain is malfunctioning, not being able to come up with words. Eyes wide and watery, you can hear the rush of your blood in your ears. Your heart beats wildly like a trapped bird wanting to escape its enclosure.“I don’t enjoy these questions, sweetie. Especially coming from your pretty mouth” Placing both of his hands on either side of your head, he gently leans in for a kiss, the feeling of his warm breath ghosting over your lips. Giving you a quick peck, then you feel his lips brushing the shell of your ear “You’re mine and you’re not going anywhere”.Wrapping your arms around his neck you gently tug him towards you, so more of his body weight is on you. Just wanting to feel him close, enjoying the warmth of his body on yours.  There are many things you’d like to say, numerous emotions and feelings you’d like to voice. But it all gets tied at the back of your throat. With a lack of words to summarize it all a simple “thank you” escapes your trembling lips. 
Those words mean a lot to Sylus, it’s something he rarely hears. And with the way it fell from your mouth so willingly, no ulterior motives behind it only raw emotions dripping in sincerity; now leaves him lost for words. He hopes you know how much he adores you, how much you mean to him, how you’re the best thing to come into his life. How he’ll always defy fate and search for you. When the time comes he’ll sit you down and recount your past together. Not now though. For now he’ll just enjoy having you with him once again . 
Resting his forehead against yours for a few seconds he decides on staying in tonight. The meeting can be rescheduled, anything can wait when it comes to you. “Let’s just stay here tonight, Sweetie” he murmurs.
“I wasn’t aware I was even invited to accompany you in the first place.” you retort. A small chuckle rumbles in his chest. A sound you can’t get enough of. 
“You would think at this point in time you don’t need an invitation. You’re always free to come with me if you desire” Sylus says, like it should be the most obvious thing to you. 
Rolling your eyes playfully at him you quip “Well personally I prefer to be told that you’d like me there.”  
“I always want you with me. Are you not aware of that?” the silver haired male asks, looking quizzically at you. “Oh.” “Yeah, oh, sweetheart.” he taunted, with the corner of his lips upturning in that dangerous smirk of his. “You’d be wise to remember that in the foreseeable future.”Intertwining his fingers with yours, he pins your hand over your head. Softly he squeezes your hand and you squeeze back. A tender reminder, that both of you are here, together right now. In your mind, you know you both are tied together. There’s a pull that can’t be destroyed between the two of you, you can't make sense of it. It feels like you both have known eachother for lifetimes. Little did you know that's exactly what's happening.  Sylus has crossed galaxies, timelines, time and time again to find you. The bending of time or the fact that he's destined to lose you and find you again again is nothing. You are his love, the person his heart belongs to, he'll turn himself into a monster if it means seeing you once again.  Rising from on top of you he kneels on the floor. Once again snaking his big arms around the back of your knees and pulling your core towards his mouth. This is where I belong. Beneath you, you can do anything to me and I’d be grateful, you can command me to do anything and I’ll do it without a second thought. Ask and you shall receive.” He says while kissing your thighs.
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catiuskaa · 24 days
Text
𝐬𝐨 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐥𝐲.
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sum. felix can’t help it, and he can’t hold back anymore, because in the end, loving you comes out so effortlessly.
wc. 1.1k
cw. fluff! so many feels, my teeth are rotten after this
req! by my wifey @/stayconnecteed right here. won’t tag you twice cause you’re in the taglist lol. loved your idea! i’m so soft for felix ㅠㅠ<3
[🌼 ☆ 🥞 ☆ 🌼]
When he wakes up, the first thing Felix does is move his body right next to yours.
He basks in your now shared warmth with his eyes closed, and he smiles giddily, knowing that he isn’t hugging you so closely and tangling his legs around yours because of how cold he may or may not be. His hand slithers between your head and your pillow, and he can’t help but letting his heart flutter and creep with cheeky jealousy at the thought of your scent lingering in the bedsheets for days. He hopes his leaves a mark. But if it doesn’t, he’s free to come back whenever —your words, not his— and he sighs happily, still a bit sleepy.
With you now right where he knows you belong, not bothering if his arm will start to feel numb, he traces the outline of your face with his eyes, carving your face deep into his memory. Shyly, when he notices you stir awake, he closes his eyes, pretending to be asleep.
He can’t know what you’ll do, and the thought has him weirdly on edge. But his heart swoons when the next thing he feels is your arms around his torso. Your nose brushes against his, and the effort he makes to keep pretending to be asleep —merely to see what you’d do, now more out of curosity than anything— and not let his breath hitch or the smile creep up his face is harder than he once would’ve thought.
“Good morning, sunshine.”
It’s a whisper that falls from your lips and strokes his whole body. It’s the first time he wakes up right by your side, and he already feels like he’s conquered the entire world. He’s just woken up, and whatever you two have got going on has been going on for a couple months now.
But today, this morning —your first morning— somehow feels different.
He’s a bit cheeky, and he doesn’t want to yet open his eyes again, loving how unrestrained your hands linger on him. He loves how your hands find home on the small dent of his waist, and almost as cheeky as him, you move his shirt up, just enough to trail shapes on the small parts of now visible creamy skin. He loves how it may seem like the paths your fingers create are mindless, almost an excuse to keep your hands on him, but as he holds back a smile, he can notice that you’re doodling on his back. Little stars that he knows can’t compare to those up in the sky, because those don’t tickle like how yours do, they don’t make you get as close to him like how yours do, they don’t make his heart flutter and swoon and giggle like how you do.
And —what he feels like it’s the most important relasation he’s had in the past ten or so minutes he’s been awake— he doesn’t love them as much as he loves you.
He notices how your fingers turn soft and tender, the pointy sides of a star changing to rounder shapes, and he’s putty in your hands, because those are shy and cute little hearts.
You sigh and move away from him, and before he can even open his eyes to pull you back, his still allegedly asleep figure gets a sheepish kiss from you.
It’s weird, because he’s kissed you so many times before, but this is different. It’s different, he knows, because for more than just the second the peck lasted before he hears the door in the room creak and your steps dim as you head somewhere else in your appartment, the room falls away. There’s nothing else there except the ghost of the touch of your lips against his, and how his heart keeps missing beats and his hands tickle to bring you back and closer to him.
His eyes are open, and his hand moves to his lips, in a daze as Felix feels his cheeks blushing like crazy. His heart is shortcircuiting, screaming at him, and his brain can’t understand it, because it just feels like he isn’t its owner anymore. He wants to move from the bed and run to you, and then you’d hug him too, traicing the same little shapes as before, and while you hug, your hearts as close as they can be, not minding all the flesh and blood and bones in between as yours calms his, and it’s so wild and unrestrained that he feels the need to give it to you.
“Take my heart, take it.” He’d say in a murmur. “I’m afraid of it, of how desperately it wants to consume you and devour you whole. Take it, because it’s yours and it feels like nothing without you, and replace it with something easier to understand.”
The scent of tea and honey wakes him up from his day dreaming, and your silhouette comes back, and you smile when you notice he’s up, his eyes locked on yours.
“Good morning, princess.”
“Isn’t that my line?” Felix giggles, turning back to his side as you leave your hot tea on your bedside table and lay back into bed.
You chuckle too, sighing in deep comfort when his arms surround you again.
“Good sleep?” You ask giggling, your hands stroking his face. Best sleep, he doesn’t say. “You’ve got marks of the pillow all over your face.”
“Well, how do you know you don’t have them too?” He teases menacingly. He knows that you haven’t looked yourself by how your eyes widen softly, and he rapidly cages you against him.
“Lix, let me go check!” You laugh, failing to move away from his embrace.
“Nope. You’re staying with me, wrickles and all.”
It’s a battle of whose’s laugh makes them weaker first, and judging by how you relax and giggle gently, he’s the winner for this one.
His eyes glow as he stares at you, and you can’t stop giggling, seeing the stars you doodled on him before stare back at you, posing as freckles on his face and as shimmers in his eyes. You kissed him before leaving, risking waking him up to release the wave of affection that crashed against you when he was the first thing you saw to start your day. A small liberty that compares in the slightest to how he kisses you now.
And you both keep laughing, laughing as you kiss each other, and none of you can make up something better than the taste of the other’s laugh in you mouths.
Then you sigh, and lean you forehead against his. You’d kiss each and every one of his freckles without him asking, as if every fiber of your being was dying because it makes you feel alive, stronger than you’ve ever felt and it’s home, and it’s then and only then when you feel it with such a raw tinge to it that you can’t hold it back anymore.
And neither can he.
“I love you.” you both blurt out, a first time of many.
You both stay there, waiting for the world to catch up and keep spinning.
“Pancakes?” You mumble on his lips, your smile never faltering.
“God, you’re an angel.” He giggles, so, so, so in love.
[🌼 ☆ 🥞 ☆ 🌼]
kats, who now feels so fucking lonely, need me a Felix ffs.
catiuskaa, september 2024 ©
PERMANENT TAGLIST! @lyramundana @stayconnecteed
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soup-spoonn · 2 months
Text
The weight of the world
A certain scene taken from this post by @medusas-graveyard
:D
(Kinda a long part, no TWs :3)
Danny had been living with the Wayne’s for about two months now, and they have long since found out about his Ghost King status.
He’s been exhausted, what with his king responsibilities, batfam responsibilities, and the Wayne kid responsibilities.
King responsibilities are the worst of them all though.
He started down the hall, hearing Dick say, “where’s Danny at?”
“Alfred replied with, “young master Daniel is still resting, and will be with us shortly.”
Then Damian chimed in begrudgingly, “he acts like the most fatigued person here.”
He opened the door to the dining room saying, “convincing actual gods not to destroy humanity is fatiguing, Dames, give me a break.” He ruffled Damian’s hair, who slapped his hand away, not quite registering Danny’s words.
“Danny, what?!” Dick asked incredulously.
“Nuthin’ important,” he said, yawning and stretching widely, his sharp canines bearing for a moment.
He then dug into the plate of food Alfred brought him, ignoring the concerned looks shared around the table.
-
“So, Danny, wanna talk about what you said earlier? At breakfast?” Dick asked, being the fourth person to today.
“Mmm… no.” He said, for the fourth time today.
“Uhm, well what you said was… concerning to say the least.” He said, trying to convince him to talk.
“Mmm… no.” He repeated shortly.
He wanted to tell them about it, but he knows how his newfound family gets.
When something bad could happen, they all jump to conclusions and start worrying and checking in and spying on you.
It’s sweet really, but unhealthy as hell.
Not to mention annoying.
Nope, Danny is not up for the weeks of stalking. Damn his sleep deprived brain.
-
“Danny, we need to talk.”
Lovely. Bruce himself is asking to talk.
“Mmm… no, thank you.” He was more polite, as he literally owes this man his life and afterlife.
“Danny.” He said, and Danny stopped in his tracks at the seriousness in his voice.
His heart literally stopped.
“I’m sorry, but I already said all that’s important! There’s nothing else to be said.”
“Maybe, but you should’ve said something. Is that why you’ve been getting home late the past week?”
“Uh… yeah. Sorry, B.”
“It’s not your fault, but you’re too young to have the weight of the world on your shoulders.”
“Who isn’t though? And anyway, I’m used to it! You know, one time I brought the entirety of my hometown back from the ghost zone? Not without help, but still!”
Bruce looked taken aback, and replied with, “that’s not a good thing to be used to, Danny.”
“There’s no turning back time. Except for Clockwork, but he can’t change this timeline.” He said with a shrug.
Bruce shook his head, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“Danny, you should probably talk to your siblings, they’re very concerned.”
Danny heaved a sigh, “think I could just tell Dick? He’s the most approachable. And he likes gossiping, thinks he’s sneaky. It’s hilarious.”
“Yeah, that should suffice.” Bruce responded with a sigh, walking away afterwards.
-
An hour later, Danny told Dick about the thing with the gods and all that, and Dick looked ponderous, and asked, “how do you convince them? And which gods are they?”
Danny turned pink and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “I showed them my memories of you guys… they’re sometimes super nice, and they need a reminder of humanity and their kindness at times… you know?”
Dick looked like he was gonna cry.
“You! Use memories of us! To save the world?!”
“… yeah…” Danny replied, still pink.
“Awwe! I’m gonna tell everyone!”
Danny let out a sigh as Dick skipped off happily, then he continued to his bedroom and closed the door.
He sat in his room at his computer until dinner, then afterwards he returned.
Until it was dark out.
-
One thing Danny really doesn’t like about Gotham is the fact that the smog over the city makes it so he can’t see the stars at night.
Sometimes he just… goes ghost and flies to above the city, above the smog, and the death, and the pain and misery the city harbors.
He doesn’t tell his family, but he’s ninety percent sure Jason already knows.
He sat in his airy sanctuary, gazing up into the stars longingly, feeling his core vibrate happily.
The stars are so incredibly beautiful and bright.
Danny smiled softly as he felt another presence floating over to him.
Superman.
He turned to the large man, who often joined him in his stargazing, to talk about life.
He’s probably told Superman more than he has Bruce.
About GIW, his responsibilities as Ghost King, his parents and Jazz…
He misses Jazz so dearly.
The two sat in silence for about two minutes, until Superman spoke first, “how’s life going, kid?”
“…I miss my sister.” He said calmly, still staring blankly at the stars.
Superman didn’t share much with Danny, as he likes just helping the boy with his troubles.
He knows of his family, who attacked him three months ago when he told them his secret.
He then traveled toward Gotham, to try to escape the GIW and his parents.
Jason then found him in Crime Alley, about to be attacked by a gang, and took him to Bruce to keep him safe.
Clark knows now that the boy lost everything he loved, and was hoping to be ended by the gang, so he could go back to the stars. (As he said)
Bruce and his family gave him something to live for, and he took a while to trust again after the two very people who raised him tried to hurt him out of- what, fear? Rage? Curiosity? It baffles Clark what their reasoning was for attacking their son.
“I know son, and I bet she misses you too.” He said, offering him the smoothie he brought for him.
Danny accepted gratefully, sipping on the smoothie- ooo strawberry!- as Superman smiled, and his Justice League communication device vibrated, disguised as a watch, and he sighed, looking at the message sent by Batman.
“Sorry, Danny, I have to go, you know, Justice League stuff.” He waved and started toward the closest zeta beam.
Danny sighed, supposing that he might as well go home and to bed, as he hadn’t brought his phone this time.
-
“Danny’s not in his room?” Tim asked, “ where is he?”
“I don’t know, he left his phone here!” Dick replied, panicked.
“Hey guys, what’s going on?”
“Danny! You startled me! Where were you?!” Dick asked, spinning around to look at him.
“I went on a walk.” He said calmly.
“We’re in Gotham, you can’t just go on a walk.” Jason replied flatly.
“I… I do that sometimes.”
“Whatever…” Jason said, defeated.
“Anyway, we’re gonna play mario kart, wanna join?” Tim piped up.
“Sure!”
Danny and Tim walked off toward the game room together happily.
-
After Jason kicked everyone’s asses at two games, then teamed up with Dick for the third, everyone was too bummed or pissed to play another round and went to bed.
Dick stayed, as he said he wanted to have a conversation with Danny. He was nervous, but complied.
I will probably continue this but idk :Þ
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after-witch · 5 months
Text
Eight Deadly Mistakes [Yandere Alastor x Reader]
Title: Eight Deadly Mistakes [Yandere Alastor x Reader]
Synopsis: You've made a lot of mistakes in Hell, but this one has to be the worst.
Birthday fic for @absolute-flaming-trash who is absolutely awesome!
word count: 1899ish
notes: yandere, abuse, obsessive behavior, humiliation, I'm joining the 'alastor yanks reader by a chain' club
Tumblr media
Hell was full of mistakes, and you figured that yours amounted to a sizable chunk--particularly since meeting Alastor. Of the countless mistakes within that particular bucket, there were at least seven distinct mistakes that led you to this very moment. 
One. It was a mistake to thank Alastor for holding the door open for you, the day you entered some run-down market in search of a book. Your voice had been surprised and sweet and ever-so-thankful.
Two. It was a mistake to let him strike up a conversation with you a few minutes later, and not pay attention to the horrified looks that even the most hardened patrons in the shop gave you.
Three. It was a mistake, later on, to think he was your friend; to believe that the shared meals, the late night discussions about music and books and little topics you’d forgotten you enjoyed, were a sign of pleasant companionship. 
Four. It was a mistake to sell your soul to Alastor, after his honeyed offers of protection from the seedier elements of Hell, his casual assurance that your friendship would go unaltered. 
Five. It was a mistake to move into the Hotel when Alastor asked, and not think there was some ulterior motive behind it all. 
Six. It was a mistake to think Alastor was actually kind, just because he was helping Charlie with her hotel, and seemingly protected those within it. 
Seven. It was a mistake to, on this day, ask Alastor if he would give your soul back, now that you’d decided to aim for heaven. Because you were friends, and he cared about you, and therefore, he should want what’s best for you--which is to get (you pardon yourself the phrase) the hell out of Hell. 
Every one of these seven mistakes--the last, you must admit, being the most significant--led you to here. 
To you, trembling on the floor, the tangy copper of blood in your mouth from where your teeth rattled against the end of your tongue when Alastor’s palpable anger made your knees literally buckle. 
“I… I don’t understand,” you spit out, voice trembling as much as your body. “I thought--I thought you…” The words don’t need to be spoken for Alastor to know them.
I thought you liked me, I thought you were my friend, I thought you would be happy to do it.
“You thought what, exactly, my dear?” 
A low electric current buzzed in the air, making the lights flicker once, twice, and again before he continued.
“That I would simply let you go?” He laughed, but there was nothing pleasant about the sound. It was full of mockery and something else, something metal and cold. 
Your stomach squirmed awfully. It was not a feeling you’d ever experienced around Alastor, despite some other’s trepidation around him. He’d never given you a reason to feel that way.
Until today.
Until you asked Alastor to let your soul go, and the room seemed to fizz with electrical interference that left the lights sparking and 
Your eyes went wide. And your brain, stupid thing that it was, pieced things together that you had been all too naively eager to ignore until now. 
The stories of Alastor’s past that you’d heard in snatches and dismissed as jealous fantasy, probably all deriving from Vox and his ilk. The way people who knew Alastor from before his sabbatical tended to steer as clear of him as possible. 
Or how Alastor always insisted you try the things he liked--clothes he left in your room (even before you told him where you lived, before the Hotel); music he insisted you’d admire more than your current collection of alt-rock CDs; foods that were tastier, he said, than your favorites. 
“I didn’t think--” The words stuck to your mouth until you forced them out. “I didn’t think you’d be mad that I wanted to get better, repent and--and get out of here.”
Alastor, despite his smile, did not look impressed.
You didn’t have time to flinch as he swung his microphone down and out, pressing it against your throat.
“Don’t act surprised now. After all,” The microphone dug into the flesh of your neck, lifting your chin until you were looking at him through blurs of oncoming tears. He continued, voice softer, missing most of its usual radio sound. “You made me like this.” 
You wanted to shake your head, but the microphone kept you only capable of looking up and straight at him. His smile made you sick. 
“I didn’t do anything,” you said, voice light, but not quite naive anymore; you didn’t fully believe the words now, and your voice wavered. 
Even if you didn’t mean to do anything to draw the attention of the radio demon, that didn’t mean Alastor wasn’t clearly--wasn’t clearly… affected by you. In some way that you didn’t understand; moreover, you didn’t want to understand it. 
What you thought had been a surprising friendship made in the bowels of hell was something else entirely, and you hated the newfound knowledge. 
Whatever it was that Alastor actually felt for you, it was dark and awful, like sprinkles of mold you find underneath the bathroom sink. Damp and rotting and unwanted. 
“You,” he said, pressing the microphone harder into your throat for emphasis, “have been quite the busy bee when it comes to me, my dear.” He sighed in a way you’d heard him do a hundred times before. But now it feels wrong; sticky, oozing. “I’d never given much thought to… certain endeavors before you. And now I find myself distracted.”
His neck turned again, cracking, and a song began to play from somewhere. 
“Distracted?” You asked, feeling sicker and sicker. 
“Oh, yes,” he answered, dragging out the word. “Quite unlike me, if I must admit it. And yet there’s something about you that’s been making me…”
He didn’t finish. The song got louder, mingling in with the ambience of the room. It was almost soft and wistful, except for the lyrics that made your skin feel cold, repeating on a loop.
And you’re mine… mine… mine…
“And you thought…” His voice continued, each word punctuated by an awful radio crackle that made goosebumps blossom up your arms. “That you would get to simply leave me after all I’ve put into you?”
All he’s put into you.
The dresses, the food, the guidance on what to listen to and how to dance; who to talk to and who to avoid. Advice from a friend, you thought. Advice from someone stronger and maybe smarter.
“Well,” he said, almost cheery now, pulling the microphone away from your sore and probably bruising throat. “I trust you’ve learned your lesson and we can avoid this…” A crackle, short and low. “Unpleasantness in the future.”
You should have said that yes, you learned your lesson; yes, you won’t ask again. But you didn’t. Instead you swallowed hard, feeling the ache from where his microphone pressed in, and added an eighth mistake to your list.
“We can avoid it if you release me from my contract--if you give me back my soul.” 
“Well,” he repeated. And this time, his voice was muffled by a brief, shrieking radio frequency. “Perhaps a reminder is in order.”
The reminder came with cold metal choking your throat; a vivid green chain led straight from your imprisoned neck to Alastor’s hand. 
One trembling hand came up to feel the collar. It was real. It was there. And the chain, too, was solid and unbreakable. 
It was a shocking sight. 
You’d seen the chains of other owned souls before. Angel’s, in particular, when you’d accidentally witnessed an argument between him and Valentino. But there had never been a singular thought given to the fact that you, too, must have had chains. Alastor never showed them to you and until now, had never seen fit to remind you about your lack of freedom.
Until today.
Your surprise and fear made you stupid, and you tried to yank yourself away from him; he held fast to the chain and began to wind it around his hand, forcing you to look upwards, speaking all the while.
“You are never to ask me to release your contract again. And you are certainly never to even entertain the silly notion of leaving me, now or in the future. Do you understand?”
An awful, slimy feeling overtook your gut. He owned you, and he had owned you for some time. You just had been closing your eyes to that reality.
A reality that was now choking you.
“Well?”
You nodded. You didn’t think you could speak, not now. Not to him. 
But it wasn’t good enough. He yanked on the chain, choking you. 
“I don’t believe I heard you, dear.”
“Yes.” The word was spoken through gritted teeth. It tasted like tears. 
“Yes what?”  The grin on his smile widened deceptively as he yanked against the chain, jerking your head upward. It hurt inside and out. 
It was so unfair, that your heart could hurt like this, even after you were dead. 
“Yes, sir.”
That should have been the end of it. He should have let go of the chain and let you slink off in fear and shame, off to sob in your bedroom over the sudden turn of events. 
Instead, he leaned down, and for a moment, his eyes glowed in a painful flash. 
“You can do better than that, my dear, can’t you, to the person that owns your very soul?” 
His hand wrapped around the chain, shortening it even further as he leaned in so close you could smell the rot around him. But it didn’t matter that you wanted to pull away from it, because he held you--literally, held the chains that kept you bound to him. Forever. 
Yes, he owned your soul. He owned you.
“Yes, boss?” you murmured, copying what Husker sometimes said; you were unable to look at him anymore as humiliated, hot tears spilled down your cheeks. 
In an instant, the chain was gone, and you fell to the ground with a clumsy thud. Your chin hit the hard floor before you could brace yourself with your hands. 
“Wonderful,” he said, praising, almost cooing. His neck cracked to the side and you imagined his bones shifting in impossible ways to achieve it. “I suppose I should remind you who you belong to when you get out of sorts like this, my dear.” His smile widened. “A healthy reminder now and then is good for the soul!” 
He laughed. Whether he thought it was a joke or not was unclear. 
“Although, I hope I won’t have to remind you too soon. I do so enjoy your company more when you’re not being…” He waved his hand in the air, glancing up at the ceiling for effect. “Stubborn.” His eyes darted to you, accompanied by the faint sound of a radio hum. “Don’t you agree?”
“Yes,” you breathed out without hesitation, unable to stop shaking from your position on the floor.
“Good girl,” he said, patting the air above your head. You watched his footsteps until he paused at the threshold of the door. You heard his neck snap as he turned it back around--you didn’t dare look up to see. 
“Don’t forget to tidy up before dinner.  I’ve left a dress in your bedroom that I’m sure will look lovely on you.”
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reminiscingtonight · 1 month
Text
You Should Talk
Georgia Stanway x Reader
Word Count: 2k
A/N: Inspired by the one and only Fletcher song
[WOSO Masterlist]
The room falls silent the second the door slams shut behind you. 
An uncomfortable tension settles as you breathe out noisily through your nose. 
It’s hard to temper the anger simmering in your veins, your glare sharp enough to shake even those who have attempted to stay on the sidelines. 
“Out. All of you,” you bite out, eyes never leaving your target. 
Georgia glares back, raising her chin just a bit back in challenge.
Your hackles rise on instinct, eyes flashing dangerously when no one moves. 
“I said leave.”
Clothes are shoved haphazardly into bags as the last stragglers shoot out behind you, none of the girls daring to meet your eyes as they escape to safety.
The benefits of being one of the last ones to the locker room generally meant less girls hanging around while you get your things together. A downside is catching conversations that clearly weren’t meant for your own ears. 
Keira pauses awkwardly in front of you, grimacing when you stare right through her, eyes never leaving Georgia’s. “Sorry. Don’t take it out too much on her. You know how she is when she’s unhappy.”
Sometimes you love how caring Keira is. How she’s always driven to mediate and fix things even if she’s not involved.
Today’s not one of those days.
Keira sighs when you don’t acknowledge her, throwing a glance over her shoulder at Georgia before slipping out behind you 
You barely wait for the door to click shut before you’re stalking forward. 
It’s no surprise that everything’s led to this. From the moment camp started things have been frosty. Leah and Keira have been doing their best to keep you two separate, nothing good ever coming out of a volatile break up. But that didn’t stop the snide comments, the muttered insults. Everywhere you turned it was like Georgia was there with her prickly tongue, each word cutting as much as the last. 
The last straw were those words you heard her complaining to Keira just mere seconds ago. 
“You're one to talk, Stanway. I’m the insane one?"
Georgia rolls her eyes, arms crossing in front of her. 
“I’m the one who ruins everything? Tell me how exactly me wanting to spend time with my girlfriend ruins things.”
“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
“No I apparently don’t! Because why am I the insane one for being upset that you never wanted to spend time with me?”
Georgia scoffs, pushing up to meet your fire with fire. “I play in Germany! It’s not like I could pop over for an hour every time you wanted to see me!”
“Oh my god, that’s not what I meant and you know that.” You press an accusatory finger against her chest, making sure to add pressure every time Georgia tries to brush your hand aside. “All I wanted was more effort. You want to tell me how many video dates you blew off so you could be out with your German friends? Or how many times you canceled plans to come home so you could jet off somewhere else?”
“Well I’m sorry for actually having a life. When you have a girlfriend who spends her time bitching at you about everything she thinks you’re doing wrong you’d skip out on calls too.”
“Oh fuck you!”
“You wish!” Georgia shouts back. 
Though you scrub angrily at your face, you’re not fast enough to hide the evidence of just how hard Georgia’s words have hurt you. Georgia’s face flickers a bit, her brash demeanor softening a bit when she catches the tears rolling down your cheeks. 
Unable to stop the stinging in your eyes, you push past her to your locker before she can say anything else. If Georgia wants to act like you’re the worst person to ever walk the earth you’ll just have to do the exact same. 
In the back of your anger hazed brain, you register the way Georgia lingers. She headed for the door the second you started shoving your clothes into your bag, neither of you wanting to spend more time arguing about how much you hated the other, but for some reason she just hasn’t left yet. 
You throw your bag over your shoulder, rolling your eyes when you spot Georgia uselessly tugging at the door. “What are you doing? Just open it.”
“You think I’m trying to spend more time than necessary with you?” she shoots back. “This bloody door just won’t open.” 
“What do you mean it won’t open?”
“What else could I mean?” Georgia scoffs before banging on the door again. “Hello? Can anyone hear us? We’re trapped in here!”
“Clearly no one can hear us otherwise we wouldn’t be locked in here.”
“Great. Just fucking great,” Georgia mutters before sliding down onto the floor. Might as well get comfortable if you’re going to be here for the foreseeable future.
“Being locked in a room with your ex girlfriend that miserable of an act for you?” you can’t help but laugh bitterly.
“You broke up with me,” she grits out, purposefully not looking your way.
You roll your eyes. “That’s why you’ve been acting like a child all camp? Because I broke up with you?”
If you cared more about your own personal safety and peace of mind you should maybe do a better job of keeping your mouth shut. Because the way Georgia’s nearly snapping her teeth at you tells you just exactly how endearing she finds the lip you’re giving her. But you're too far gone to care at this point, wanting Georgia to feel nothing if just a piece of how you've been feeling these past couple months.
Georgia scoffs but you cut her off before she can say another word. 
“No, you listen to me, Georgia. I broke up with you because you gave up first. You clearly wanted an out so I gave it to you.”
“Don’t do that!” she snaps. “Don’t blame it all on me. It takes two to fuck things up.”
“Don’t give me that ‘woe is me’ crap. You gave up long before I did and you know it.”
“What did you want me to do? You kept pestering me about your mum and then you showed up where I work to fight about it! How am I the bad guy here? You’re the insane one for doing that!”
“For the last time, I didn’t go to Bayern to fight with you, you self-centered asshole!” You throw your hands up in frustration. What you really wanted to do was throw your boots at her, but the thought of having to help Georgia stop any bleeding if you actually made contact was the only thing stopping you from doing so. “I was touring the training grounds because they offered me a contract. I wanted to check it out before making any decisions.”
The day you landed in Germany still haunts you. You traveled straight from the Colney to the airport to Bayern’s practice grounds. It was only ever supposed to be a quick trip. Explore the training facility, talk with a few of the execs, maybe surprise Georgia with a quick dinner before returning to London. 
What you didn’t expect was to run right into your girlfriend after making your first loop around the area. 
Georgia was elated at first, but you could spot the apprehension settle in just as quick. Making your excuses she had grabbed your wrist and dragged you into a deserted room.
Accusations were thrown. 
“Are you seriously here to lecture me in person about missing your mum’s birthday next week?”
“What’s so wrong with me being here? Got a secret girlfriend you’re trying to hide?”
Old wounds were rehashed.
“Stop being so bloody insecure!”
“Quit being such an attention whore then!”
By the time you left it was with a broken heart, a broken relationship, and a newfound resolve to stay the hell out of Germany. The national team was something you couldn’t, and wouldn’t, get out of, but spending everyday playing club level with your ex was something you’d never do. 
When your words sink in, Georgia freezes. Her mouth drops open, face one of surprise and conflicted regret. “I didn’t-- You… No one told me.”
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” you mutter, picking at a thread on your sweater. “So much for that.”
The bad times were bad, you won’t deny it. Both you and Georgia are hotheaded enough that arguments weren’t rare to come around. You always end up resolving them, but frustrations about being so far away from each other mixed with emotions neither of you could adequately express bubbled over until you called it quits. 
Yeah, maybe you should’ve tried harder, but in the end you were just too defeated to do so.
Although things crashed and burned horrifically, however, you couldn’t deny how much you still loved her. There would always be a part of you that belonged to Georgia, no matter how infuriating you found her. 
You’ve known each other since you were children, the relationship something everyone expected to happen. Everyone always joked about the two of you dating when you were younger, the affection you had for each other always superseding those of regular friends. When Georgia asked you out in the middle of the night during one of your youth camps, you couldn’t help but say yes. 
For years the two of you made the distance work. Georgia was always in and around the Manchester area while you were in London yourself. You always made sure to carve out enough time to still travel to see one another, quality time important to the two of you. 
So no, distance wasn’t something new to your relationship. But for some reason the distance between England and Germany proved to be too much for the two of you to bear.
Germany was something you could never take away from Georgia. From the moment she told you about Bayern’s offer, you knew she was going to accept it. It was something you knew Georgia has always wanted to do, play in a new league, experience a different environment. And of course you were happy for her. You’d never be anything less than proud of everything your girlfriend has achieved. But if you had known just how badly the move would’ve messed up your relationship maybe you would’ve tried harder to convince her to stay. 
So who knows, maybe in another universe the two of you made the distance work. Maybe you brought up the things that bugged you before they turned into something bigger than it was. Maybe you made the move to Germany and the two of you lived happily ever after. 
But this is here and now, and there’s no denying how much Georgia’s hurt you (and how much you’ve hurt her back). 
“You’re an asshole, Georgia Stanway.”
Georgia sighs, shutting her eyes as she lets her head thump against the locker behind her. It’s a thump of defeat, one that tells you everything you need to know about how much Georgia wished she did things differently. “I know. I’m sorry.”
You’re silent for a moment as you take her in. It’s hard to miss the bags under her eyes, the barely existent chewed down nails, the minute details that showed just how much Georgia’s been hurting too.
You let your head thump backward too. 
“I’m sorry too.”
.
When the doors are unlocked hours later, Leah finally having enough mind to read her texts and discover the lock-in, she’s expecting nothing short of carnage. What she sees instead is the two of you asleep, your head on Georgia’s shoulder as your hands stay clasped together.
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