#they don’t have an oracle lego

[444moonbae]

that one helbabs fight in bop

[neptunezo]

If I lived in Gotham, I personally would rather die than be saved- because imagine you’re about to be human centipede’d and this mother fucker shows up

[emelinstriker]

I don’t know if this has been asked yet, but if it has, I haven’t seen it. Anyway, what’s the in-universe reason for Reader? Like why was the master system put in place? There’s been some hints with the Celestial Hunters in the Azure one shot, but I don’t think you’ve said why. Besides the obvious fan service, why is the master-champion system needed in this world? Sorry for the long ask but I’m a huge world building nerd, so… Thanks for your time! Love the AU in general.

~ 🦊

Me struggling to respond in a way that's both still understandable while also not dropping too much lore- Like I legit had to remove some things after I already wrote them fghgnfhgnhfg

Technically the initial in-universe reason was basically more of a case of "This vanilla-ass universe fucking sucks. Needs more chaos and confusion. Why did you decide to make it this boring, bro? What are you supposed to work with here- It only has one new item!" And said item was then replaced with the champions and the entire palace's domain, before yoinking the same soul that was used before and shoving it back into the mix with a bonus-

But in general, the Master System is a way of analyzing, and studying the various different types of Readers. Exploring the philosophies surrounding the idea of comfort, as well as comparing various individuals and different upbringings. Although this time, the experiment is being lead by the Judge, who is keeping things a lot more in order than his brother. But unlike his brother, the Judge isn't so fond of actively being involved in said stories unless really necessary. And thus, the Oracle is seen as main overseer of the AU.

The Master System isn't required for the universe itself to function or exist, but it's what makes it stand out and makes the experiment more interesting. Same with the champions' conditions. The infection isn't a must have for the universe itself to function or exist, especially cuz the infection itself isn't even from there. However, it is kind of required for the experiment to proceed. :)

And one generally major hint I can drop about the world the Reader and their servants live in:

"Lego sets are simple toys created to play imaginary games with. Living in a delusional falsehood of safety. This type of delusion is nothing more than a Lego set."

- J

I'm not gonna go deeper into the details of what's going on behind the scenes or how the infection works though, since that's too big of a lore drop, and I think this was enough for now.

[ordon-shield]

Animated Zelda Adaptions

With recent discussion of an animated Zelda film to follow the Mario movie, I got to thinking about ways to adapt different Zelda games into animation. While a Zelda movie wouldn’t necessarily need to be an adaption of a specific game, with the variety of styles the series has gone through over the years, they’d need to pick one to go with — so here’s my thoughts.

Zelda 1/Adventure of Link/A Link to the Past/Link’s Awakening

I’m putting these four together because I think they could all be adapted into animation the same way — based of the original official art, in the style of an 80s cartoon (just with a bit more of a budget). Each game could be a season of a TV show, expanding on the somewhat limited plot by making it episodic and using the extra time to expand on the characters and world within that format.

Ocarina of Time/Majora’s Mask

For these two, I think stopmotion in the style of Laika (known for Coraline & Kubo and the Two Strings) would work the best (or using 3D stylised to resemble stopmotion, like the Lego Movie). The OoT style doesn’t seem like one that would translate to 2D very well, and I think it would be fun to borrow some ideas from the Link’s Awakening remake for the Switch and have the character designs stylised so they look almost like action figures. While Ocarina of Time would have to be a movie, Majora’s Mask just wouldn’t work in that format, since the sidequests are so vital to the overall story, meaning a one season series would probably be the best way to adapt it.

Oracle of Ages/Seasons

I’ve never played these two myself, but I think going more ‘anime’ with them would work well, although it would be fun to work in the pixel art of the original games somehow. Like the other Downfall Timeline games, these ones would would work best as a TV series — maybe three seasons, one for Ages, one for Seasons, and one for the linked games ending but adding in extra story where Link travels between Holodrum and Labrynna. For an animation studio, someone suggested Toei Animation, who apparently did the animation for the LA remake.

Wind Waker/Phantom Hourglass/Spirit Tracks

Wind Waker, the one that got me thinking about animated Zelda in the first place! I think this is the only Zelda game that would work with Illumination due to its more cartoony style, although other studios like DreamWorks would also work. Although if it was done in 2D, based on the official art, Cartoon Saloon would definitely pull it off. Wind Waker would work pretty well as a movie with pretty minimal changes needed to the plot, and Phantom Hourglass/Spirit Tracks could make up a Zelda trilogy.

Minish Cap/Four Swords Adventures

Leaving out the original Four Swords due to its complete lack of story — I think these two would work with a similar style to the Wind Waker trilogy, although I’d definitely prefer them to be 2D over 3D. Minish Cap would definitely work as a movie, but I’m not sure about FSA, it probably depends on how much is pulled from the manga.

Twilight Princess

Much like Ocarina of Time, I don’t think the Twilight Princess artstyle as it is would work in 2D. Based on their work like Wolfwalkers and Screecher’s Reach, I think Cartoon Saloon could definitely replicate the vibes of the original game in a more cartoony style. Alternatively, they could go full anime with this one — although it would definitely work better as something more inspired by 90s anime and its more realistic proportions.

Skyward Sword

Initially I was leaning towards Ghibli and while it would definitely work, just doesn’t feel right to me. Maybe Toei again? I’m not too familiar with Japanese animation studios, but Skyward Sword is definitely a good fit for the typical ‘anime’ look. Also I don’t think 3D would work here.

A Link Between Worlds

While technically a sequel/remake to A Link to the Past, the differences in art style make me feel that this one should have its own look — preferably 3D so the contrast with Link’s painting form is strengthened.

Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom

These ones have got to be Ghibli, there’s no question about it there. The big question is do you make them each a series, or a movie with a number of timeskips? Either one has benefits and downsides.

[ao3feed-timkon]

Magic, Monopoly, and Mr. Mxyzptlk

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/6D53JhW

by adamolupin

What does a lobster thermidor, a gallon of milk, and a body swap have in common? A trip to the Watchtower med bay.

Words: 6697, Chapters: 3/3, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Superman - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Superboy (Comics), Supergirl (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics), DCU (Comics), Batman (Comics)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Billy Batson, Kara Zor-El, Kon-El | Conner Kent, Duke Thomas, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Barbara Gordon as Oracle, Damian Wayne, Mr. Mxyzptlk (mentioned), Batmite (mentioned), Shazam/Captain Marvel, Huntress (mentioned), Black Canary (Mentioned)

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake/Kon-El (implied), Jason Todd/Kara Zor-El (implied)

Additional Tags: Magic sucks, Everyone can agree on that at least, Monopoly strikes, dares, lobster thermidor, Because LEGO Batman will never not be funny, A gallon of milk, Kon's amazing leather jacket, Seriously I'm so happy they brought back his original 90s look, Body Swap, Talking like a chicken, Interdimensional water buffalo, Canon compliance - I don't know her, TW: throwing up

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/6D53JhW

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Welcome to Too Much Information Tuesday!

Every year, around 3000 people get bubonic plague.

It is believed that The Library Of Congress has sex tape audio of JFK.

Half of all human beings have mites living in their eyelashes.

385 million years ago, fish had fingers.

The US military spends $42 million a year on Viagra.

One-third of all the fish caught around the world never get eaten.

You are more likely to be friends with people who smell like you.

‘Yahoo’ is an acronym for ‘Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle’.

94% of the world’s languages are spoken by 6% of the population.

The ancient Egyptians invented the will and ‘the business handshake’.

A kiwi’s egg is so large it’s equivalent to a human mother giving birth to a six-year-old.

Hugging and/or holding hands with the person you love has been proven to reduce stress almost instantly.

The truth does not mind being questioned. A lie does not like being challenged.

“If you don’t like to read, you haven’t found the right book.” (J.K. Rowling)

The DC Comics character Snowflame got his superpowers from cocaine.

Beer mats were originally placed on top of glasses to keep the dust out.

The Bayeux Tapestry features 93 penises: 5 belong to men and 88 to horses.

In 1907, a riot broke out in New York over a play in which a woman drank a glass of beer.

If everyone had access to soap to wash their hands, it would save 600,000 lives a year.

The Pentagon is successfully hacked 250,000 times a year, and unsuccessfully hacked 10 million times a day.

The chairman of a company is four times more likely to be a psychopath than the doorman.

Blowing out the candles on a birthday cake increases the number of bacteria on it by up to 1400%

Regardless of household income, children of authoritarian parents are a third more likely to be obese.

If someone truly loves you, they tend to hug you for at least 5 seconds or more.

Your personality is who you are. Your attitude is usually based on how a person treats you.

When your mood randomly goes from happy to sad, it's often an indication that you're missing someone.

So far in the 21st century, LEGO has proven to be a better investment than gold.

Your taste in music is something that develops through experience and is not something you are born with.

During sex, men tend to get distracted by worries about performance; women tend to be distracted by concerns about appearance.

Sylvester Stallone was so broke before his script for Rocky was accepted that he sold his dog for $25. A few weeks later, he bought it back for $15,000.

In 2015, a lawyer from Kenya offered 44th US president, Barack Obama, 50 cows, 70 sheep & 30 goats in exchange to marry his daughter Malia.

The word 'kleptomania' was coined in the 1860s because words like robbery, theft and larceny were considered inappropriate for the upper classes.

An American teenager named Ethan Couch, who killed four pedestrians while drunk driving, was given no prison time after claiming affluenza, a mental illness from being too wealthy.

Bedtime Procrastination is the psychological phenomenon when a person stays up too late in order to feel like they have some time to themselves.

In 1963, a Turkish man renovating his home knocked down a wall in the basement and uncovered a mysterious tunnel. He followed the tunnel which led him to a hidden ancient underground city (Derinkuyu). The city once homed up to 20,000 people.

At the 1912 Olympics American athlete Jim Thorpe competed in the decathlon while wearing mismatched shoes, one of which he found in a rubbish bin, after someone stole his pair. He went on to win gold and set a record that would stand for 20 years.

In 1993, a Frenchman named Emile Leray driving a Citroen car in a remote area of the Moroccan desert had a breakdown and became stranded. To survive, he tore down the car, built a motorcycle from the parts and then rode it back to civilization.

In 2013, a homeless man, Billy Ray Harris, returned a $4000 ring to a woman who unknowingly dropped it in the street. To show her gratitude, Sarah Darling set up a fundraising page. The page raised over $180,000 which enabled Billy to get a house, car and, soon after, a new job.

Okay, that’s enough information for one day. Have a tremendous and tumultuous Tuesday! I love you all.

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Magic, Monopoly, and Mr. Mxyzptlk

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/Jej1DP3

by adamolupin

What does a lobster thermidor, a gallon of milk, and a body swap have in common? A trip to the Watchtower med bay.

Words: 1843, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Superman - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Superboy (Comics), Supergirl (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Mr. Mxyzptlk (referred), Batmite (referred), Billy Batson, Captain Marvel, Kara Zor-El, Kon-El | Conner Kent, Duke Thomas, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Barbara Gordon as Oracle, Damian Wayne

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake/Kon-El (implied), Jason Todd/Kara Zor-El (implied)

Additional Tags: Magic sucks, Everyone can agree on that at least, Monopoly strikes, dares, lobster thermidor, Because LEGO Batman will never not be funny, A gallon of milk, Kon's amazing leather jacket, Seriously I'm so happy they brought back his original 90s look, Body Swap, Talking like a chicken, Interdimensional water buffalo, Canon compliance - I don't know her, TW: throwing up

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/Jej1DP3

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Podoboo

Debut: Super Mario Bros.

Before I start this post, I’d like to clear something up. Podoboo? Yes, Podoboo! I’m well aware these enemies are often called Lava Bubbles and that’s the name Nintendo has been trying to make standardised these days, but you know what? You can’t make me! Podoboo is a lot cuter, plus its the name I grew up with and changes in society scare me and cause me to lash out! Maybe Lava Bubble is closer to the Japanese name of just “Bubble”, but since when has that been a factor in any of the localised names? Do you really want to refer as Lakitu as “Jugemu”, huh? I’ll have you know one of my civil rights as a citizen of Wet Dry World is to refer to Mario enemies with whichever official name I please. Like it or leave it!

So this is a post about Podoboo. Do you like Podoboo? I certainly Podo-do! They are perhaps the most generic design you could give to a Mario enemy, a visibly Dangerous Thing with two eyes, but they have always charmed me! It’s the little things, like their distinct shape and the fact their pupils are somewhat wider than most obstacles like this. They bring me comfort in dire times. No matter what happens, I know Podoboo will be there, jumping at a set height in a particular spot of lava! Without them I would be nothing! 

So simple is their design, isn’t it weird to think they started off as even simpler? The Podoboos in the first SMB game are completely blind, and with no eyes they may as well not be creatures at all! Of course, I’m very glad they are creatures, and their iconic behaviour was there from the start! They love to jump, of course! There is nothing they would rather be doing!

Awaken! As of Super Mario World, they have been gifted sight and are no longer blind to the sins of this world! Hurray! What do you think they see as they jump up and down? I’m surprised it doesn’t make them dizzy!

You’ll be glad to hear Podoboos have had an expansive career ever since, now with their new trademark eyes! After all, they are THE lava enemy! Anywhere you’ve got that tasty hot fire juice, these guys are soon to follow! Here they are in Super Mario RPG, called Sparkies here because they couldn’t make up their minds on a localized name and probably because they confused them with Li’l Sparkies. In Yoshi’s Story they even called them Spark Spooks! Geez, I’ll even take the name Lava Bubble over this! But doesn’t this render look nice and juicy?

Though any great career has its flops, and I have to say... I am usually the first to campaign for the unique designs from the first three Paper Marios, but I do not really like this Lava Bubble! This takes away from their distinct Mario-y charm and makes them look like a Fire Enemy you could find in any other game! Though in the RPGs they are able to float around without needing any lava, the ones in Super Paper Mario act just like the platformer ones, jumping around despite not looking like they should be doing that! Ok!

The Podoboo from New Super Mario Bros. DS just wasn’t trying very hard at all. Come on! They could’ve it a bit more justice than this! 

Ah, there we go! The Podoboos in New Super Mario Bros. Wii decided to finally stop messing about and go back to what everyone loved from them in Super Mario World. I encourage experimenting with your identity, of course, but it’s good to be back, and now they are more mortal than ever! A single shot from an Ice Flower is enough to instantly vaporize a Podoboo in a puff of smoke, which is a bit scary! Are they really just pure fireballs that can be put out just like that? What a frightening life to live!

And in Super Mario Galaxy 2, they... hey, wait!! You took away their eyes again! Now you are just being inconsiderate. This outraged me as a kid! One of my most vivid memories of playing this game with my brother involved chanting “Podoboo rights! They deserve eyes!” because this upset me so much. Maybe my past as an activist is why I am so passionate about Mario enemies these days... I think I was 100 percent correct in hindsight, and now you know some of my backstory, too!

What relief it gave me to find out they were back to their usual selves in 3D Land! And they have been ever since, of course getting redesigned for the modern Paper Mario games and everything. 

What’s this? Blue Podoboos! Podo-blues, even...! They show up in 3D World, in its incredibly cool-looking blue lava levels! It’s a well known fact that blue fire is objectively cooler than red fire, and it seems even the Podoboos wanted in on the action! Blue Lava is an actual phenomenon I’ve just learnt, though it’s a sulfuric fire rather than lava. Could it be that Podoboos, being made entirely of lava, adapt to their environment? I’m not sure...

As an aside, the blue Lava Bubbles aren’t to be confused with Lava Bubble (Blue), which are from Mario Galaxy and show up during King Kaliente’s fight! They hop around on the ground and have square-ish eyes, which is enough to make them different I guess!

The Podoboo’s next big appearance, in Super Mario Odyssey, was in Soup! Yes you heard me- Soup! Some delightfully pepto-bismol pink coloured soup, no less. This is why I wasn’t too sure about Podoboo’s being able to adapt to their environment earlier- the Luncheon Kingdom is a big soup volcano after all, but the fact these Lava Bubbles are able to live in it is very interesting!

There is simply no way I would talk about Odyssey here without talking about possibly its greatest achievement, the best game design decision ever made! After decades of begging from fans, they finally did the impossible- they made Podoboo playable! Now it is Podo-you! It is quite unlike the other captures in the game, since it keeps the Podoboo’s simple-looking eyes and simply adds onto it a nose and a mustache! You may very well be the world’s first Podoboo with a sense of smell! I wonder if that is a benefit or not. The constant smell of soup might be a bit overpowering. 

Not only is this delightful, but it gives us more insight into the life of the humble Podoboo. First of all is the fact that they can swim around in lava, not just jump in one spot! Do you think they do this when we aren’t looking? I really hope so! Imagine a school of Podoboos swimming through molten lava in a castle’s moat. How delightful! 

The Luncheon Kingdom is also home to a number of Lava cannons, marked with a Podoboo’s lovely face. These are cannons for only for Podoboos to launch themselves across the kingdom, from one body of lava to another! My question is whether this was technology made by Podoboos themselves or whether it was made by some generous Podoboo lovers as some lava equivalent to the Fish Tube. I think I would take either explanation! 

And last I have a Podoboo appearance that even I, the world’s biggest Podoboo fan, didn’t know about! Paper Mario Color Splash has a Big Lava Bubble boss which speaks with you through a Shy Guy translator! It is quite upset that you barged into its volcano and decided to change the temperature. Mario, of course, kills it anyway, and also the Shy Guy translator without a second thought.

Still, just take a look at this sprite sheet! How cute! A little disappointing that they thinned out the eyes, but wow! They more than make up for it with this range of expressions! An angry Podoboo! A sad Podoboo! And my personal favorite is of course the shocked Podoboo with its assymetrical dot eyes, which might be one of the best things I’ve ever seen. 

To be honest, I could talk about Podoboo forever! If you didn’t stop me, I would go on all day about their every appearance, but I kind of had to limit myself to some of the most relevant ones. I just think they’re neat! And cute! And silly! Besides, I’m Mod F Boy, so I’m basically obliged to talk about fireballs with eyes! But for now I must bid you Pod-adieu! 

...Not! What, did you really believe me? Well you clicked the Keep Reading button, so you only have yourself to blame for this. Here I am talking about more Lava Bubbles from all over, because Lava Bubble’s career has taken it BEYOND the Mario series! Wow!

Podoboo’s had quite a few appearance in the Zelda series, appearing in Link’s Awakening, both the Oracle games, and even Cadence of Hyrule! Their Zelda wiki page is still called Podoboo instead of Lava Bubble, which means those Zelda fans have it better than we do. But wow, this is a pretty angry looking Podoboo! I wouldn’t mess with them! 

Both the Oracle games even had a Podoboo Tower! Amazing! They look quite a lot like a Fire Snake, but they are simply a tower of Podoboos! Why don’t they do this more often?

Hm... The Cadence of Hyrule one doesn’t have any eyes. Come on guys! It’s 2019! Podoboos having eyes should be standard! Though they still made the conscious decision to call them “Podoboos” in 2019, so I can’t be too mad. 

And they have even spread to Minecraft! In the Mario Mash-up Pack, they replace the Magma Cube enemies, and really there was no better choice for this. And now we have a Podoboo Cube! What more could possibly be left for Podoboo?

The answer is obvious- Podoboo in real life! Thanks to a certain Lego Mario set, Podoboo is now real and can be in your home for the small price of 19,99 US dollars. Please give a Podoboo a home today! Just make sure you don’t own anything flammable. 

[serinemolecule]

@voxette-vk I think you don't need to be a programmer to understand programming well enough to understand Google v. Oracle. And if the Supreme Court couldn't, it was only because it was explained poorly to them.

Programming is just telling a computer to do things. This is a concept that already exists in the human world: recipes, IKEA assembly instructions, LEGO instructions...

The recipe analogy works very well... it's barely even an analogy, it's just exactly what it is. A program is a recipe, except written in a language that a computer understands.

(Recipes are, of course, not copyrightable, but Congress made a special exception for computer programs to be copyrightable, for the economic benefits.)

So Sun made the Java language, and also the Java Virtual Machine (a robot which follows recipes written in the Java language).

What's that Carl Sagan quote? "If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe." Recipes to make things from scratch are really complicated. Imagine if you had to write instructions for creating a universe that spawns a solar system that has a planet which supports plant life in such a way that wheat evolves, which can be cultivated, then milled into flour, and then further milled into white flour.

It would be nice if you could instead write "1. Get flour from somewhere". So that's the Java Standard Library. A library is a recipe book for the Java Virtual Machine. The Java Standard Library is a recipe book that the Java Virtual Machine always comes with, with recipes for things like flour, so you can write your recipes safe in knowing that if you say "get flour", the robot will always know what to do.

Google wanted to make a robot that understands Java, too. But to be able to read recipes written for the Java Virtual Machine, it would need to know how to get the same ingredients that people who wrote recipes for Java expect to have available.

So that's what they copied. Not the recipes, which they rewrote from scratch. But simply the list of the names of the ingredients. Only enough to create a robot capable of understanding existing Java code.

At this point, we understand the situation well enough to understand some important points:

• Google took a list of ingredients. Then removed some ingredients that weren't relevant to smartphones, and added others that were. But that's all they took.

• Google did not take "code". Oracle would have you believe that Google stole the words "Chapter 1", "Chapter 2", and "Chapter 3" from their book. The only content Google copied was the list of ingredients. The fact that the list of ingredients was written in the Java language rather than English does not change the fact that it was a list of ingredient names and nothing else.

• Sun's only actual contribution to the list of ingredients is: the choice of what to include, and the names of the ingredients.

• The decision of which ingredients to include or not include is not copyrightable, as stated explicitly by the Supreme Court. Not that it matters, because Google chose to include different ones (including some Sun omitted, and omitting some Sun included).

• Sun did not invent the word "flour". They specifically chose not to use something like MaxPowder™, but rather to use the exact same words every other programming language uses, which come from English words people have used for centuries.

• A list of ingredients a robot knows how to make is, regardless, squarely on the "idea" side of the idea/expression dichotomy central to copyright law, established in Baker v. Selden and later codified in the Copyright Act. The Copyright Act even explicitly states that names are not copyrightable. Even if you argue that there is creativity in making an organizational system, organizational systems are explicitly, in many very clear precedents, established as not being copyrightable.

[sodamnbored]

Percy Jackson Convention Ideas:

Just off the top of my head, please add anything I’ve missed.

Staff wearing CHB and SPQR shirts; as in, ask your camp counsellors for assistance.

Dealers hall obviously with all the merch.

Have an arcade somewhere with games and fun stuff. Call it the Lotus Arcade.

Have a chill out room, make it kind of like a lounge where you can go just to hang out for a bit where it’s quiet and comfortable (I’ve seen other conventions do this, it’s a nice place to take a break). Call it the Underworld and have a Cerberus statue or something sitting by the door.

If there are any staff in the Underworld break room, they could be dressed as Furies.

Terminus statues at the exits and re-entry points. Bonus points if there’s guys sitting in a plinth made up like Terminus to talk to people coming and going. If he gives you the go ahead a normal security person will give you the hand stamp/check your stamp. He needs helpers of course. Just don’t mention why.

The information/help desk booth could be run by Athena. Because she knows things. So Ask Athena instead of Information. Maybe it should be an Oracle?

So many games and competitions.

Pimp My Chariot. You need the bases pre-made maybe for safety, but then let people arts and crafts the hell out of them with supplies. Most awesome one wins.

Chariot Races. If you can assemble safe working dinky little chariots, people can race in teams of two. One “charioteer”, give them a helmet and maybe a weapon, to ride in it. And one “Pegasus”, give them cute little fake wings, who hold like a bar or handles or something and have to drag their teammate to victory. Sort of like a wheelbarrow race but cooler and nerdier.

Sparring with foam swords and shields. Obviously.

Maybe a sort of interactive panel where you get taught some moves with weapons?

DIY weapons. Make, customise, and take home. Spears, swords, shields, shoes with wings, anything.

If there’s a bar, the barman should be dressed as Dionysus. Could be strictly a juice bar, but if there’s alcohol for the grownups, bonus points if he gives you a dirty look if he has to serve it to you. He’s the best at ID’ing underage smartasses too. “If I can’t drink it, neither can you. Have a Coke.”

Monster hunts. Probably some variation of tag or cops and robbers. You have people dressed as Cyclopes or other monsters running around and you need to go out and tag them with your weapon. Either it’s staff as the monsters, and game players win when the monsters are all gone and if a monster swipes you or something then you’re out instead. Or it’s two teams of game players, really like cops and robbers. When you get “killed” you have to go to base (Underworld for monsters, Camp for heroes), which will be designated spaces in the game play area. So if you get hit, you have to run back to base, maybe touch the wall, or do a penalty, like five star jumps or something or wait for a minute, then you’re “reformed” or “healed” and can go play again. Your team wins if they get rid of all of the other team, or at the end of a set time limit whichever team has the most players on the field.

Same sort of idea but with Camp Half-Blood vs Camp Jupiter. Whichever people fancy.

War games and or Capture the Flag. You definitely need Capture the Flag.

Climbing wall. We probably don’t have the budget or necessary paperwork for real lava though. Sorry.

Piñatas of Giants and Titans.

Maybe a little station to be assigned a Godly parent. Just for fun. Either take a quiz, maybe Buzzfeed would sponsor the convention, or just a random generator or spin wheel. You could get a bandana or something with that God’s symbol on it.

If anyone needs to bring in a dog, the ticket agent needs to ask “he’s not a Chimera, is he?” Before they let them in.

Quizzes with prizes.

Whatever panels we can come up with.

If you could raise the money and manage it, Rick could maybe be convinced to be a special guest. Do signings or panels.

If it’s out by then, the cast of the new TV show could also be invited. If you had the budget anyway. And if their parents let them; they’re gonna be like twelve after all.

Activities based on the Gods. Build stuff out of Lego or something for Hephaestus. Write haikus for Apollo, or something music based perhaps. I don’t know Hook A Duck or Hippocampi for Posideon? Games of Chinese whispers for Hermes.

Perhaps some sort of scavenger hunt like quest? There could be things hidden around the convention hall you have to find and whoever gets them all first or the most by the end of the day wins? Could be like GISHWHES if anyone knows it. Some things you just take pictures of. Like if there’s find a certain type of monster, say find Medusa, then there could be a picture or cardboard cutout on a wall or something, innocuous until you see the scavenger hunt list, so take a picture of it to prove you found it. If there’s a cosplayer dressed as it, that counts too. Some things you do collect, like a Drachma maybe. And there’s somebody wandering around the hall with a bucket of them and will give you one if you ask, or just the bucket sitting quietly somewhere and you can just take one if you find it. Some could be things you need to do, so you could take a video of you doing it. Like annoy Dionysus, so go take a video of you making him serve you alcohol or something. Panic Terminus over border control or something.

That’s all I can think of for now off the top of my head.

[thegodskeeper]

Tagged by @lands-end-ada.

While everyone is cooped up, let’s share some of our favorite distractions. Bonus points for answers that involve things that are free and/or commonly found at home.

🎬 Movie/TV/YouTube: I have been watching a lot of musical animatics and silly Minecraft videos (“I put 100 people on an island and forced them to build a Starbucks” etc) on YouTube. I’ve also been watching Deep Space Nine with one of my best friends via Netflix and timing the play button just right, cause he’s never seen it before, and watching My Little Pony the same way with my partner and her other partner.

🧶 Craft/Hobby: I have been taking advantage of this time to work on the novel series I’ve been loosing away at since 2010. I’ve made the most headway I have in over a year, so I’m feeling very positive about it. Since the stories are important to me, my husband and my best friend, it’s given me people to talk to as I work. Collaborating with someone you vibe with (Ada [cough]) is always great.

📖 Story: Maybe I should have put the ‘hobby’ under here. I’ve not done much reading lately, but I’ve got a tidy collection on my AO3 to catch up on, and I’m considering re-reading my favourite series (again) - The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch. Oh! I’ve also been listening to two podcasts: Dungeons and Daddies - new, and The Case of Charles Dexter Ward.

🍲 Recipe/Snack: Soup has been my staple, because I’m woefully overdue for a run to the supermarket. I’ve also broken into my secret stash of Fox’s Glaciar Fruits, and a friend delivered me some apples yesterday so they have been very enjoyable.

🏋️‍♀️ Exercise: Well I’ve been a bit of a couch potato this time around, but I’m usually quite fond of the app Zombies Run, which lets you unlock a story as you rack up miles. I often keep my phone in my pocket while I’m doing housework and cooking etc, so that counts the steps. I’ve also just been stepping outside in the dead of night, when there’s no one else around, and walking around my house absentmindedly to get some fresh air; I live quite a bit out of town anyway.

🎲 Games: I’ve been meaning to do some Minecrafting on Creative Mode, just to see what I can come up with; I used to always love LEGO. I’ve also been playing Pokémon: Let’s Go and filling out my dex on Pokémon Sword (although I’ve taken a short break so I don’t get pikachu’d out!). I’ve also been sort of addicted to Kittens Game by bloodrizer, which is an online game where you’re a kitten farming catnip.

🎧 Music: I have been listening almost exclusively to musicals, partly to try and catch up on those ones I keep saying “I’ll listen to all the way through one day”. So far I’ve listened to: Hamilton, Legally Blonde, Mean Girls (wasn’t impressed, but loved one song) - new, Heathers, The Count of Monte Cristo and Beetlejuice - new. On the ‘new and still to listen to’ list is: Be More Chill, Dear Evan Hanson, Deathnote, In the Heights and Newsies. On the relisten list is: The Bifrost Incident, Ulysses Dies at Dawn, Les Miserables and Hadestown.

🎨 Art: Writing, again? And maybe I’ll try and do something with that ferret calendar I’ve been holding onto for forever and a day, or put some more pen to paper and work on the Wandering Oracle.

🏖 De-stressors: Does sleep count? I’ve been napping a lot. But honestly my lifeline has been talking to friends, and getting fresh air in the evenings. It’s really nippy here, but if I put on a bunch of layers and take a blanket out with me, it’s kind of nice to think out there.

😘 Tagged: @edderkopper, @bookwyrmbran, @asexual-thot, @an-avaar-skald-and-bearsark, @aynrandslashfiction, @bibliophilicwitch, @cannibalcoalition, @crystalbrujo, @hermeticimp, @inkstormcandlespit, @love-me-some-nice-moss, @maddiviner, @north-of-annwn, @renniequeer, @saccarinepasserine, @sethtalon, @arcanecalligrapher, @scotchjolras, @thorraborinn, @wodneswynn, @cargopantsman, @centerpointwitch, @krembearry and you!

You know the drill: answer and tag.

[princedrewwrites]

Hey, for the unusual asks, if you feel like doing any of these: 3, 11, 12, 16, 18, 21, 29

Hi lovely! Thank you so much for sending these in! It’s turned out a bit long so I hope you don’t mind. Thank you! 💖

3. rant. just do it

As much as I love the Lego Batman Movie for finally showing off the found family aspects of Batman to a mainstream audience, I really wish that Barbara Gordon had been disabled like she was in the comics for literally!! Years!! Oracle is non-existent in the eyes of pop-culture outside of comics and I would love to actually see her on-screen one day, as well with all the other Robins who aren’t Dick Grayson (as much as he is my favourite but please DC give me my Nightwing solo movie). Also don’t get me started on how Dick Grayson is more Carrie Kelly than himself.

11. what unusual talent do you have?

Okay talent is pushing it but I wrote a poem about this once so don’t @ me. I am an excellent pillow for dogs. Most of them just fall asleep on my lap. I don’t know how. But I’m not complaining.

12. what’s the most interesting schools gossip you’ve ever heard?

I mean!! There’s interesting and then there’s fucked up, which is the majority of gossip that was from my high school/sixth form years. But according to my uni’s confession page (and confirmed by my housemate, who knows the house where it happened) someone stuck a fork up their [REDACTED] and put it in the cutlery drawer. Immediately after, their housemate used the fork to eat his food. Also no one knows if the two cats on our university campus are related to each other or not.

16. if you had to get a tattoo right now, what would you get and where?

The irony of this was before we all went into lockdown, I actually had a tattoo appointment booked and lined up. It was of a rabbit chasing a star, and it was going on my left arm, just above my inner elbow.

18. rant about your favorite musician

Sufjan Stevens just continues to put out songs that I listen like I’m emotionally stable to handle them when really, I’m not.

21. what’s a conspiracy you believe in?

I mean, I’m not really a conspiracy person. I guess maybe the idea that Pokémon Z got cancelled in-order to rush Pokemon Sun and Moon out in time for the series’ anniversary. Idk, it’s not the best, I had a friend who didn’t think the moon was real.

29. what quote or inspirational setting do you think is bs?

A lot of them, actually, because most of them are of the mentality that everything is a choice and external factors don’t matter! What a middle-class concept! It’s amazing! 

[douxreviews]

The NeverEnding Story (1984) Review

“The video arcade is down the street. Here we just sell small rectangular objects. They're called books.”

Have you ever become so immersed in a book you are reading that you actually begin to imagine yourself in the story? That is exactly what happens to Bastian when he reads the incorrectly named The NeverEnding Story.

Based on the novel of the same name written by Michael Ende, The NeverEnding Story is about the unfortunately named Bastian Bux, a quiet young boy who loves to read. One day, while hiding from some bullies in an old bookstore, he stumbles on a mysterious book called The NeverEnding Story. The grumpy bookseller warns him that this is "not safe" and he doesn't mean in a Fanny Hill sort of way. Indulging in a little bit of harmless shoplifting, Bastian takes the book and hides himself in the school's attic to read it (because a creepy attic is preferable to a maths test). The book tells the story of Atreyu, a young warrior from the world of Fantasia summoned by the ruler of the land, the Childlike Empress, to find a way to defeat a force called "The Nothing," that is consuming everything. As the film progresses, the lines between fantasy and reality start to blur and Bastian quickly realises just how unsafe this really is.

Again, not in a Fanny Hill sort of way.

Sometimes all you need is a good title sequence. It doesn’t have to be some mind-blowing, David Fincher-style creation, just one eye-catching enough that if you’re flicking through channels you’ll stop and go “Huh, this looks interesting, I might give this a go”. That is how I first came to watch The NeverEnding Story. Looking back, there’s nothing really revolutionary about the film's title sequence. Just some pretty cloud effects and an annoyingly catchy pop song. But it was enough to pull me away from building cities and spaceships with my Lego for two hours.

This was the first English language film for director Wolfgang Petersen. Along with Enemy Mine, The NeverEnding Story is the film that stands out the most on Petersen’s CV. It is the only time the director made a pure fantasy film. Before he’d previously only done thrillers and gritty war dramas like Das Boot, while his later Hollywood work is a mixture of action and disaster films. Even his adaptation of The Iliad, Troy, strips away the Gods from the story, leaving behind a bog standard, rather dull sword and sandal epic.

Watching this film today it is not hard to see why he's steered clear of the genre since. Fantasy just doesn't really seem to be Petersen’s forte. He doesn’t have Ridley Scott’s eye for detail, the technical wizardry of Jim Henson or the wild imagination of Terry Gillian or Guillermo del Toro. Petersen's Fantasia is your run of the mill fantasy realm, full of all sorts of cutsie magical creatures. Even the story, at least the one Bastian is reading, is your basic quest structure as Atreyu goes from one corner of Fantasia to another, facing one obstacle after another in search of a way to stop the Nothing. Standout sequences include Atreyu's horse, Artax, being sucked into the Swamp of Sadness (which I'm sure traumatised more than a few children), and the gates leading to the Southern Oracle (that used to give me the chills as a kid).

The film never really tries to explain what the book is. Is it a doorway into the world of Fantasia or is Fantasia merely a creation of Bastian’s mind that the book is making a reality? Maybe it’s both. I've always suspected that the book always tells a different story for whoever reads it. This is how it is a never ending story because the story is always changing. The story that Bastian reads does seem like it has been shaped by his own imagination. Atreyu is very much the hero Bastian wishes he could be; a brave and fearless warrior, not too dissimilar from the illustration on his satchel. Halfway through the film Bastian is even shown to be Atreyu’s true self, pretty much confirming that he is a creation of Bastian’s mind.

Things get even more meta towards the end as the Childlike Empress talks about Bastian reading Atreyu's adventures and others (us, the audience) following Bastian. At the start of the film Bastian’s father (played by Deadwood's Gerald McRaney) advises his son to stop daydreaming and face his problems. Reading a story about a world described as being humanity's hopes and dreams, being slowly destroyed by a force that represents, among other things, the denial of childish dreams. The very thing his father told him to let go of is the key to saving this world.

Another interpretation is that the young lad is simply losing his grip on reality following the death of his mother. Reading the book has simply coincided with his complete mental breakdown. The book is just that, a book. When the bookseller told him it isn’t safe he was simply yanking Bastian’s chain. This is probably what the narrator means at the end when he says Bastian had many adventures before returning to the real world. He was found by the janitor the next day, mumbling gibberish about Lucky Dragons and such, locked up for several years in a mental hospital before recovering and becoming a productive member of society.

Or maybe I’m just overthinking things.

Notes and Quotes

--The film was followed by two sequels: The NeverEnding Story II: The Next Chapter, which adapted the second half of Ende's book, and The NeverEnding Story III: Escape from Fantasia, which was just a load of nonsense they made up.

--Ende was not happy with the film and had his name removed from the opening credits. He even sued the studio to try and get the name changed. He lost.

--Since the Rock Biter is made out of rocks, isn't it technically cannibalism that all he eats is rocks?

--Unusually for a fantasy film, there is no traditional antagonist for the hero to battle. The closet we get is Gmork, a vicious wolf sent by the Nothing to kill Atreyu.

--Why does Atreyu have to leave his weapons behind? That seems a rather silly thing to do for someone about to go off on a dangerous quest. Imagine if Elrond had told the Fellowship to do that.

--It's hard to hear, but the name Bastian shouts out is Moonchild.

--The original AURYN prop is now kept in Steven Spielberg's office.

Bastian: “How many wishes do I get?” The Childlike Empress: “As many as you want. And the more wishes you make, the more magnificent Fantasia will become.”

Morla, the Ancient One: "We don't even care whether or not we care."

Mr. Koreander: “Your books are safe. While you're reading them, you get to become Tarzan or Robinson Crusoe.” Bastian: “But that's what I like about 'em.” Mr. Koreander: “Ahh, but afterward, you get to be a little boy again.”

Two and a half out of four names for a Childlike Empress.

Mark Greig has been writing for Doux Reviews since 2011

[ao3feed-timkon]

Magic, Monopoly, and Mr. Mxyzptlk

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/uVUjyTG

by adamolupin

What does a lobster thermidor, a gallon of milk, and a body swap have in common? A trip to the Watchtower med bay.

Words: 1843, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Superman - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Superboy (Comics), Supergirl (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Mr. Mxyzptlk (referred), Batmite (referred), Billy Batson, Captain Marvel, Kara Zor-El, Kon-El | Conner Kent, Duke Thomas, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Barbara Gordon as Oracle, Damian Wayne

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake/Kon-El (implied), Jason Todd/Kara Zor-El (implied)

Additional Tags: Magic sucks, Everyone can agree on that at least, Monopoly strikes, dares, lobster thermidor, Because LEGO Batman will never not be funny, A gallon of milk, Kon's amazing leather jacket, Seriously I'm so happy they brought back his original 90s look, Body Swap, Talking like a chicken, Interdimensional water buffalo, Canon compliance - I don't know her, TW: throwing up

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/uVUjyTG

[themattress]

Unpopular Opinion Re:Batgirl

I’m going to come right out and say it...

Barbara Gordon was the worst Batgirl, and The Killing Joke ultimately did her a favor.

I’m not saying she’s bad as Batgirl, she’s fine, she’s OK. But there has rarely been a version of her as Batgirl that has really stood out to me. The ‘60s TV show version wasn’t allowed to actually get into fights. The DCAU version had a great run in the middle of her career, but she started out lame and ended up lame. The Alicia Silverstone version was a complete joke. The version on The Batman TV show had issues in how her initial arc was written and seemed like a composite of Babs and Stephanie Brown. Even the Rosario Dawson-voiced LEGO version was unremarkable - she was already a competent police commissioner, and she’s just suddenly thrown the costume and name by Batman rather than by her own choice. And do I even need to begin on everything that was wrong with The Killing Joke DTV version?

This all comes down to a core problem with the original comics version: her reason for becoming Batgirl. It would work in most other superhero comics, but not in Batman. The core “Bat Family” is defined by their past trauma, it is what their motivations are all rooted in. Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake...they all suffered traumatic incidents and heavy loss that lead to them adopting their superhero monikers. Most of Batman’s Rogues Gallery are the other side of the coin - people whose past trauma and losses led to them becoming villains rather than heroes (the Joker being the biggest case of it, as his trauma was evidently so great that it drove him so insane to the point where he can’t even remember what that trauma was!) And then we have Barbara Gordon, who becomes Batgirl because she’s a fangirl of Batman and isn’t allowed to get a job in law enforcement by her loving but overprotective dad despite her abilities. One of these thing is not like the other.

Up until after The Killing Joke, Barbara Gordon just didn’t seem to fit with the rest of the cast. She never escaped feeling like token representation for the sake of it, not allowed to have the same psychological depth as her male colleagues or the villains. Now, I’m NOT defending the choice to cripple her when it was made, since Babs becoming Oracle was not pre-planned and it was just a case of “fridging”. But I do believe that it was retroactively the right thing to do because of how much more interesting she is as Oracle, how much deeper and more interesting she is, how much greater and thus more compelling her struggles are, and frankly how much more badass she is. As Oracle, Barbara Gordon is now a woman who used to pride herself so much on her physical abilities and then lost them in a traumatic event. She now fits perfectly with the rest of the cast! I think that’s the point The Killing Joke DTV was going for, but it botched it horribly by portraying Barbara in such a bad, unlikable manner.

It’s part of why I hated DC restoring her to being Batgirl, which is the equivalent of turning Nightwing back into Robin - both of the Batgirls that followed Barbara after she became Oracle were a lot better in the role. Cassandra Cain had an excellent backstory and motivation for becoming Batgirl, not to mention the coolest costume. And I only took issue with Stephanie Brown becoming Batgirl because Cass stuck around as the stupidly-named “Black Bat”, literally indistinguishable from her as Batgirl, which made Steph taking the mantle feel needless and redundant - if Cass had just stepped down for real and served as Steph’s mentor figure instead of Barbara, that would have been perfect, since Steph really IS an ideal successor to the mantle given the close friendship she’s always had with Cass, her background and skills, and how both in-universe and out it’s a redemption for the horrifically misogynistic turn she had as Robin where she was brutally temporarily killed off.

What I’m getting at is that I don’t hate Barbara Gordon as Batgirl, since she was likable and admirable and I think we should all be grateful to her for originating the mantle (we do not speak of “Bat Girl” Betty Kane), I think the truth is that she was never anything special as Batgirl and wasn’t even particularly interesting or matching with the rest of the Bat Family. Oracle was a big upgrade for her, and both Cass and Steph were big upgrades for Batgirl.

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Magic, Monopoly, and Mr. Mxyzptlk

by adamolupin

What does a lobster thermidor, a gallon of milk, and a body swap have in common? A trip to the Watchtower med bay.

Words: 1843, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: DCU, Superman - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types, Superboy (Comics), Supergirl (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Mr. Mxyzptlk (referred), Batmite (referred), Billy Batson, Captain Marvel, Kara Zor-El, Kon-El | Conner Kent, Duke Thomas, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Barbara Gordon as Oracle, Damian Wayne

Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake/Kon-El (implied), Jason Todd/Kara Zor-El (implied)

Additional Tags: Magic sucks, Everyone can agree on that at least, Monopoly strikes, dares, lobster thermidor, Because LEGO Batman will never not be funny, A gallon of milk, Kon's amazing leather jacket, Seriously I'm so happy they brought back his original 90s look, Body Swap, Talking like a chicken, Interdimensional water buffalo, Canon compliance - I don't know her, TW: throwing up

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/44123200