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#they have come to the conclusion both that maybe the need to try talking before genociding
berryz-writes · 2 hours
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It's always going to be you
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Summary: You and Azriel spend less time with each other and soon it seems he spends more time with Elain- apologising and fluff
Azriel x reader
I watched, holding my breath as Elain let out a small laugh at something Azriel said, her hand coming up to rest on his arm. Did she need to do that? No, she probably didn't. But I let it go because she was getting better now. Her smiles were more frequent and if she found my mate funny then fine. I wouldn't be jealous about it.
Another week later and Elain and Azriel were walking the streets of Velaris. I had paused in my tracks to watch them, their heads bent together talking about something important it seemed. It felt like I hadn't gone shopping with Az in so long let alone have a nice conversation that lasted longer than a minute. They seemed comfortable together. Fine. As long as they were both happy there was no reason for me to jump to conclusions.
It was game night and Elain and Azriel had paired up. Yes, they were playing chess against each other but they chose each other and left me on the side lines, merely part of the audience. I wasn't even give a second glance. "Y/n? Aren't you going to play?" Cassian asked from where he was sat on the sofa, one arm around Nesta the other holding a glass of wine.
I shook my head "I'm tired. Maybe next time" I turned to look back at Azriel because like usual I was drawn to him. It seemed he was unaffected by our bond now because he hadn't even looked at me once throughout the entire day. The longer I stared the harder it was to fight back tears. I stood up and mumbled an excuse to leave, Nesta being the only one who listened to my made up excuse. I walked out the house and rubbed my hands together, my feet taking me to the bench I had sat on so many times. Luckily I was smart enough to grab hold of a thick shawl before leaving. The Sidra was as beautiful as always, lights glowing around the area, Fae spilling out of different bars across the street.
I pulled the shawl closer to me and tried to enjoy the sight in front of me rather than my mind going back to things I didn't want to think about.
Where are you?
Y/n? Are you okay? Where are you? Tell me where you are.
Sweetheart please. Are you allright?
Azriel's voice, panicked and full of fear in my mind. The spiteful thing to do would be to ignore him and build a barrier between the both of us but because I was never able to see or hear Azriel worry for so long I replied with
I'm fine
I went home for the night, enjoy yourself
I blocked him out. I didn't want to think about anything right now. I wasn't in the mood to talk to him.
Of course if someone asked if I still loved him I would have replied with a "yes" in a heartbeat. Maybe we just needed space. Or maybe I was being dramatic. It's not as if I had walked in on them kissing or something.
"Fancy seeing you here, y/n" Someone said. I had to blink away my sleepiness and try and find the source of the voice. It was Keller. A friend who I usually had lunch with when I was in town or needed someone to help me translate a piece of text.
I gave him a warm smile, his blonde almost silver hair shining in the street lamps.
"Is there a seat free?" He gestured next to me at the empty bench but before I could answer a loud thud was heard behind me and without having to turn around I could tell who it was. He must have hidden his scent because otherwise I would have known he was coming this way earlier.
"Apologies, but the seats taken. You should get going now" Azriel's voice was tight and full of anger, one wrong answer from Keller would result in things that were too gruesome too think of.
Still, he hesitated, looking between me and Azriel who was behind me and probably sending daggers at him.
"I'll see you tomorrow. Have a nice night" I gave him an awkward smile, trying to reassure him.
"Right. Enjoy your time." And with a nod "Shadowsinger" He walked away soon disappearing behind a corner. I didn't bother turning around and instead waited for Azriel to show himself. His footsteps were light as his form came into view, blocking the scene of the Sidra. He stood there for a good minute or so evaluating every inch of me with his piercing eyes. His shadows moved away from him, coming to brush against me as if they were checking if I was ok as well.
"Are you all right? Your not hurt are you?" His voice was soft, a great contrast to the tone he was using with Keller a second ago.
I sighed "Physically, yes"
He took this as a chance to sit down next to me, making sure there was a small distance between us. As if he wasn't sure what I wanted. I wasn't sure either. I wanted space but I also wanted him to wrap his arms around me and tell me everything would be alright.
"I didn't know what happened to you. I thought you had been taken. I thought I wouldn't see you again" Azriel's voice was quiet and almost broken in a way. I turned to look at him, to see if he was the same Azriel as a few weeks ago.
"What's happened to us?" I asked. I didn't know either but there was one thing I knew and that was something had changed.
As soon as the words escaped me, Azriel froze. His breathing coming to a stop and his eyes focused completely on me and my breathing. For the first time in my life I heard him stumble over his words "what...what do you mean?" He asked, his voice so quiet and full of worry. His shadows paused their constant movement around me and froze as well, their touch now cold.
I wrapped my arms around me, the shawl suddenly not doing much to block the cold out properly "Don't you feel as if we've grown apart? Like...maybe we aren't as close as we used to be?"
I couldn't look at him while saying that. Instead I let my head fall back so I could look at the comforting sight of the stars. Something that was always there. I felt a slight shift to my right where Azriel moved closer to me, his wings coming to wrap around me.
I looked at him, opening my mouth to thank him for the warmth but before I could say anything his shaky voice interrupted me "I love you. I will always love you. I am so sorry you felt as if I wasn't giving you enough time. I know you deserve more than I could ever-"
I put my hand up to stop him "It's not about that. It's about you always being with Elain. Tell me, Azriel. How long has it been since we've been shopping together? How long has it been since you've come home when I'm not asleep because it's the middle of the night? How long will this go on? This back and forth of me waiting for you while you go off with Elain doing who knows what"
I felt his heart beat increase with every word I said and as I let it all out I felt full of guilt. I was being irrational and dramatic. And Azriel didn't deserve it. We had been through so much and I was complaining about him not spending time with me
"sorry. I didn't mean that. I just...got carried away" I looked away from him. He looked heartbroken and I had done that to him.
A silent minute passed before Azriel broke it by picking me up and winnowing us to his room
"what? what are you doing?" I asked, disoriented from the winnowing. I sat on his bed, trying to get used to the soft lighting in his room.
He sat next to me and held my hands in his, warmth seeping through me "I could never cheat on you, sweetheart. I'd rather shred my wings than hurt you. You understand that...don't you? There is nothing between me and Elain and there never will be. I'm sorry you felt that way" He pressed a kiss to my hand, his eyes golden in the light. The way he looked at me made me think, how could I have doubted him?
"I know you aren't cheating. Of course I know that but why does it feel like you spend more time with her than me?" I ask quietly, afraid of the answer. Maybe it's because I've become boring now after all these years.
"My love, your the one who told me to help her. You told me spend time with her because she seemed to like my company. I did it for you, sweetheart. Don't you think I'd rather spend my time with my beautiful mate?"
His hand moved up to cup my cheek, brushing away a tear that had escaped. "It's always going to be you."
I leaned into his comforting warmth and let my doubts and fears wash away. "I'm sorry for doubting you, Az"
"you had every right to" He mumbled back, his arms now encircling me completely. I felt safe and wanted in his arms, like nothing could ever go wrong.
(KEEP IN MIND I LOVE ELAIN EVERYONE. my personal opinion is she should end up with lucien)- as usual not proof read
MASTERLIST
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NEED thoschei to make another catastrophically ill-fated attempt at fixing what went wrong this round because i NEED to hear one of them say this
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Do they know if you wear silver or gold?
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When they want to buy an engagement ring do they know what to choose?
Yes, without a doubt
Kaeya
Sneaky bastard is so sure about your preferred metal and style he only needs to figure out the gem. He already got the jeweler waiting for when he figures out your ring size
Has to check
Childe
He was truly just going to get two jewels that represent you two and whatever metal matched best but when his sisters heard the look of surprise they had made him stop on his plan. After much talk about how one of them almost left her boyfriend because she was given the wrong metal and the other almost accused her boyfriend of cheating he decided to be very ‘subtle’ but direct.
The next time he is at your home he asks to see your favorite ring/necklace. By that time you already guessed what would be his next question in a few days
Neuvillette
It's Furina who managed to make him confident enough to talk to you outside of an office setting, and to ask you to be his lover, and actually to ask you for marriage. Her poor back.
Most of the planning is due to her, be it the restaurant reservation or the little speech, now the only detail left was the ring. What she didn't expect was that as soon as she asked your preference he would be stiff as a stick and rain started outside.
Let's spend another hour trying to tell the big dragon that not being sure about it isn't a sin nor is he a crappy boyfriend
Diluc
He is sure he knows, he bought you many rings and earrings with that metal but he would rather make sure you love it than let his newly acquired fear that he might make a mistake choosing metals keep him up at night.
he snoops around the porcelain box in the vanity filled with necklaces and rings just to confirm. Maybe three or four times, just in case
No, in their eyes gold and silver jewelry is the exact same. Has to go change the ring last moment
Itto
For him the ring itself isn't that important so he would propose with a pop ring if it happened, but after saving for so long he manages to buy a modest ring his granny and Shinobu approved of.
If it isn't your color you could change it and he wouldn't notice until he puts your wedding band, and anyway he is doubting himself because he isn't really sure
Zhongli
He understands that when choosing clothes for someone their aesthetics and likings should come first but honestly when he starts planning the best engagement ring he forgot that little detail, too focused on having cor lapis for a good luck omen or a tiny engraved flower that represent undying love.
Just forgive him this once. If it makes you feel better the ring itself is both silver and gold intertwined so he is about 50% right?
mf does a color analysis on you to see which is better before the idea of checking your other jewelry
Kaveh
Even if he doesn't have a lot of money, he keeps a stylish and clean appearance and that extends to you, essentially playing dress up with you, layering fabrics of different weight and color, playing with different region’s styles, so when he starts dragging you to try jewelry it wasn't strange.
Even if he gets it wrong he defends himself saying that it's the most flattering on you
Albedo
He might not be too interested in fashion matters but he heard you talk about seasonal colors and undertones and, after a 3 week long intensive exam, he came to the conclusion.
By the time he has the ring he figured he could have just asked you.
What you two found on an adventure is now your engagement ring
Beidou
The idea to propose only came to her mind when her crew was digging around a treasure they found at sea, the pearls, golden coins and different gems spilled over the floor, one of her crew grabbed a showy ring and acted as if he was proposing to his friend.
That caused her to howl at them while laughing “ Getting married before your capitan? Aren't you two gutsy?” And she chugs her beer. Next morning as they arrive to voyage and she stands close to you her whole crew starts whistling and yelling to show them the ring.
Bennett
(he is doing his best)
His dads often tease him about getting big and already having a lover. Even as he tries to escape his embarrassment he gets trapped in the arms of his fathers and told stories of their youth.
When one of them mentions proposing to his late wife with a ring he found in a chest, it particularly stuck with him, when you ask them why bennett has been adventuring so much lately they just smile as if it was an inner joke.
Honorable mentions
Wanderer
Be it the teachers of his classes, classmates, the dancers of the grand bazaar or even lesser lord kusanali everyone wore golden jewelry or accessories, EVEN HIMSELF! Don't blame him too much when if he defaults to gold for anything
Alhaitham
He proposes to your privately and the next morning he takes you ring shopping to make sure you love it and can make adjustments for your ring size and add or take away anything that isn't quite perfect in your eyes before the announcement to your friends.
Insist it's because he wanted this to be a bonding moment but you got the lightest idea he just didn't want to risk it being wrong
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PAC: What makes you a good partner
This is for both singles and those in a relationship. This is for encouragement if you are still looking, to remind you of how wonderful you are in a connection. It’s plain just to make you feel good about yourself if you’re in a partnership.
Please pick between groups 1, 2 or 3. Group 1 is the woo-hoo badge, group 2 is the wing, group 3 is the be mine tag.
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GROUP 1
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4 of wands (joy and stability) - Third eye chakra - communication - get centered - love
I got a feeling of insecurity and it made me wonder if that’s how you’ve been feeling lately. I don’t know if it’s about your abilities in general or directly in a relationship. 
So, I’m talking to myself here like a lunatic right, and I’m going through what the psychic tarot could be saying so far. And I just can’t help but get a state of mind situation here. And I talk and talk, wondering if this is you, could it be your love interest, whatever. Suddenly I realize - I’m overthinking. Is this what you/they do? Overthink this stuff?
I really can’t help but think this is the beginning of a status check. Because logically i would look at it in a straightforward way but my intuition tells me the reversed version of what first impressions are: The feeling of being insecure, trying to tell the future, wanting things to be a certain way, not trusting. I wouldn’t be surprised if a few in this group read a lot of that future spouse or soulmate stuff. For those in a relationship right now, you could be worrying if it will work out, how long will you stay together, will this last etc.
I honestly don’t know if this is how you used to be, this is what you’re overcoming, maybe this is what your partner deals with, I don’t know.
I feel like when you mellow out and feel calmer, it’s like there’s a box that unlocks. Maybe when you’re feeling anxious, you aren’t present with a person or able to show your more fun or loving side as much as you would like.
Your affirmation cards are great. It gives me the impression that you’re a straightforward person who doesn’t mince their words. If you like someone, you’re going to tell them. If you wonder about their feelings, you’ll ask them. If you want a committed partnership, you’ll see if they agree instead of wordlessly hoping.
I’m going to be absolutely honest, and it seems contradictory to me, but i honestly got the insecurity stuff before, but it’s like… At your best, you can be the most centered, calm and peaceful person. Your partner could be stressed and worrying or even getting argumentative and you wouldn’t react the same. You would be able to hold it together and tackle things calmly.
I have finally come to the conclusion that this is you, unlocked lol.
Group 1, I don’t know, it seems like you’re having a hard time. I’m getting distracted, the feeling of wanting to give up. This is the time when you most need peace. You don’t need to give up, you need time. You need time for yourself, and to really be so soft with yourself. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, you need you right now. You need to spend time with you. You need to hear the birds sing. You need to feel the grass at your fingertips. You need to close your eyes and know there’s something there for you, just for you. That the birds chirping right now that moment are being heard by only you in the way it’s happening, with the clouds that are showing right now. The way the light hit your window and made that little rainbow. That the funny quirky thing the person across the street was seen only by you. Isn’t it weird? It’s like some moments are made just for you. 
And that’s why there will be that relationship made just for you. This is confirmation that there will be that partnership. If you’re facing issues in one right now, get back to you for now and let what will be, be. If you’re seeing someone and wondering, let them come to you.
In a safe, happy partnership you will feel seen. You will be peaceful. You will feel secure and that feeling will spread to your partner. You are open and honest. You are loving, even clumsily. 
Things go wrong but you will know that everything is still right. Things will be alright. You no longer need the 8 ball to tell whether or not, because you will know. When you feel secure, you are your own fortune teller. You will re-align, and you wil learn to have peace and move on from disagreements. You will know how to still be loving, even when irritated.  You know what to prioritize as a partnership, what practical things you should deal with together. What matters most. You will have faith in yourself and extend it to your partner. I see you growing old with someone, mainly because you will let yourself. That security is the foundation for a long and happy relationship if you wish for it.
Love says:
“Love is a many splendored thing. Today I notice and appreciate 3 of those splendors. Like the fact puppies make me feel like a parent. Or the surge of self congratulation when I sink a three point trash basket shot on the first try. Or how about the chills I get while singing along to ___”
Get centered:
“When it gets to be too much, whatever it is, I close my eyes and return to my center.”
Communication: 
“Wonder how that other person is feeling? Ask ‘em. Wish they knew how you were feeling? Tell ‘em. You’ve just been drafted into the communication army, where there is a strict do ask/do tell policy. Speak with kindness and gentleness, and reach an understanding.”
I hope this made sense for you. Remember, it will all be ok in the end.
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GROUP 2
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Support - manifest - believe & succeed
You are a cheerleader for sure. Extremely supportive of your partner's endeavors. This group seems to choose people with ambition or dreams. You lot probably are more into manifestation or law of attraction than other groups. It’s likely you’ve had your successful manifestations and know that it works, so in theory, it should for your love interest too.
You honestly seem great as a team. A very happy and willing participant. If your partner needs something suddenly sorted, whether it’s a chore, or administration work for their business, you will drop what you’re doing (less important stuff ofc) and help them.
Support:
“I look at the vast network of support in my life, and I’m reminded of what a superpower it gives me. At any moment, I can call an army of top-notch people who want the best for me, which means I’m basically invincible. Take that, loneliness! Run for the hills, boredom!”
Very good cheerful energy, I see you really trying to keep things upbeat and positive for their sake. Just in case though, do remember it’s not all your job, and they are the captains of their own ship, ok? You might get a little sidetracked because you get so excited for them. I’m getting the idea that you would never ever get jealous of a partner (it can happen sometimes. Not unusual, not bad), and you always wish the best for them. 
You really open up the other person's eyes to possibilities. You make them think about things they might not have been brave enough to before. It’s like through your partnership, you wake them up to possibilities. Maybe you even wake them up to spirituality/manifestation. You make the other person feel secure. Like they have something to come back to after they go out on a limb and try something. 
They will know that if they fail, they could hate themselves or feel bad, but you would never look down on them. You would just send them right back out lol. Try again, then. Is what I get. There’s so much confidence and faith in this other person. You know, you just know that they can make it. Where they see nothing, you see something. You know more is possible for them and yourself. You make, or will make your partner feel like they are something. When they always thought they were just ordinary or boring, when their self esteem isn’t where it should be.
Careful of carrying a relationship for the both of you though, you want someone who is able to gain the momentum and motivation that is like yours. If they don’t have the energy, it’s just not going to happen the way you see it for them. It’s got to be by them, for them, ultimately. If you are single, be careful of investing into a person who may agree with your goals/vision/excitement only to talk about it, and not follow through. You could talk someone up and big them up till the cows come home, but they will have to prove themselves to themselves. Talk only goes so far.
You might also bring extra connections or support to your partner. This could be your family being lovely and bringing them in, being completely inviting and helpful. This could be they gain a place in your friend group too. They could get networking opportunities because of who you know, that kind of thing. 
You bring a lot to the table, but remember, everyone is their own captain so you come first. You have tremendous energy, belief and determination to make things happen and work. You need to make sure it’s matched.
Hoping for wonderful things in your love life.
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GROUP 3
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Release - Master (rev) - Inspiration.
You have a lovely combination of cards, group 3. I really see you’ve done the work on yourself.
Firstly, if there is anyone here that has escaped a negative or abusive situation, you are seen as an inspiration and you have become such a wise person that people look up to.
You really try to take care of yourself, and I like that. It’s often said that it’s attractive in love to put yourself first and that’s what I think your partner does/will like about you. There’s no desperation to make the person like you or want you. That kind of thing makes certain people chase.
Release here is just giving me the feeling of being chill, of not needing to prove anything. You know it’s important to be vulnerable at the right times in love. There might have been past issues regarding control, vulnerability and openness. I feel that you’ve really moved past some lessons in romance regarding those things. You could have listened to someone or read something that made you realize what was happening, or why you seemed to be having a pattern, or attracting certain people.
I see that you have intuition and you allow yourself to listen to it now. It will become invaluable for yourself and also your partner. You could get gut feelings and tell them, whether this is about their work situation or whether you feel something bad about a journey.
I'm seeing that you’ve had to let go of a lot so you’re not attached to outcomes. That same surrendering energy is helpful in partnerships because you’re not invested whether your partner will or won’t do something. You don’t want to control them, or try and manipulate them to do a chore, or to decide on an option you think is the right one.
You let love be free, and that’s beautiful. There’s a sweet, open, surrendering love that is there for the sake of being love. The person could go off randomly and you would still hold appreciation. When you are in a partnership, you look like you bare it all and choose to trust. I feel like you’ve been really hurt but you’ve come back and decided you want to love anyway.
If you’re not there yet, you will be. You have too much love in your heart to give. Just because someone was incapable of love doesn’t mean you are or should be.
You really inspire your partner, there could be a muse here. You really give the other person room to be themselves and voice their ideas. You hold that space for them and let them express themselves. There’s a lot of soft, quiet loving energy here. You don’t love loudly, it’s quiet and constant. Your love is a gift in itself, it’s how you are the most wonderful partner. Just by loving the way you do.
I think when you’re with the right person, you make them feel very safe to be themselves. I’m seeing that you would be a good parent, a good person to have/adopt/foster a child with. You would be very good at guiding and encouraging them. You are a very considerate person, and you don’t go around tooting your own horn. I get a modest feeling here. 
You help and are supportive in ways that aren’t super visible, someone would have to be really watching to notice what you do. There might be a little mischievous side, or a sarcastic sense of humour that can go under the radar. Your partner will appreciate that very much. Such lowkey energy but so strong and constant, dependable.
I feel like you should be very proud of yourself. I think you’ve overcome a lot and there’s a lot of humility here, but don’t downplay yourself. I feel like your partner does/will tell you to express yourself, or make a move on some kind of idea you have. I get the idea you’re used to someone else being the main character, or someone else being a focus or supported. Your partner will say it’s your turn.
That’s what I’m seeing group 3, have a good one.
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redwlf843 · 1 month
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Looking out for her
Abby Anderson x fem! reader
Summary: you were tired and you missed your girlfriend so safe to say you were not in the mood today. When Mel starts saying some stuff about Abby you can’t help but come to your girlfriend’s defense
Warnings: arguments, cursing, tiny bit of Mel bashing, tiny bit of Owen bashing, mentions of anxiety, I think that’s it.
-
You were not in the fucking mood today. Your knee is still hurting from your previous patrol, you woke up late so you got barely anything for breakfast, and Isaac has Abby running so ragged you’ve only seen her in passing within the last 72 hours.
You usually didn’t kind lending a hand in the medical tents, sure sometimes it got rough but for the most part it was just dealing with superficial injuries and when the little ones got sick. But today. Oh after today you just might request a permanent change. You’re usually friendly decent with Mel. It’s no secret she has something against Abby, usually it’s just snide comments you can brush off or something mumbled under her breath.
But today you came into the medical tent at just the wrong right time.
“It’s her fault you know. Owen is barely on base, he barely sleeps, he’s just he’s not the same anymore. Ever since Jackson he’s not the same. If she would have just acted like a normal person and not some blood thirsty mon-“
Slam
You slammed the canister of disinfectant on the table making Mel and the other person in the tent jump.
“What the fuck did you just say?” You asked seething.
“Nothing. Let’s just get back to work.” Mel says brushing you off.
“No. You don’t get to say shit like that and brush me off.”
“Oh? I don’t get to? What you’re going to clobber me like your crazy fucking girlfriend does?”
You can see the moment she realizes what she has said but you’re too far gone, you’re pissed and you can’t help yourself your mouth opens before you think.
“We both know this isn’t about Abby, we both know that this is about your insecurity about Owen but Abby is your scapegoat so you don’t have to realize that you’re pussy of a boyfriend who’s too afraid to step up and take responsibility for a choice her made” your eyes flick to her pregnant belly before meeting her eyes again. “Is still in love with his fucking ex. You see it and I see it the way he watches her it’s disgusting, Abby has told him to grow up and move on but no he can’t take a goddamn hint so instead of going off on my girlfriend who has tried to lend an olive branch so many fucking times maybe you need to fucking talk to Owen and get your shit together.”
The tent was silent all that could be heard was your heavy breathing as your rage dissipated, the fogginess of your mind faded and you could see the wetness gathering at the corners of Mel’s eyes and part of you felt bad but the other part of you hoped this would be a wake up call for her to realize that with Owen she’d be doing everything on her own.
You spared her one final glance before rushing out of the tent accidentally knocking into someone’s shoulder.
You head was starting to hurt, you could fell your heart racing, your hands were shaky and clammy. God you hated conflict, ironic for a WLF. You had to get back yours and Abby’s living quarters.
Abby was exhausted, she never slept well without you and all the work Isaac had her doing well she was lucky if she was able to catch a nap in the library for more than 4 hours. She was looking over some maps trying to plan the best patrol routes to prevent being ambushed by scars, when she heard hurried footsteps getting closer to her.
“Pendja!” Manny called out to her
“Pendajo” Abby responded her attention still on the maps pinned to the wall
Manny rushed around the corner and was behind her trying to catch his breath having rushed from the med tent to find her.
“You need to go get your girl.” Told her
Abby froze her mind jumping to the worst conclusions possible
“What? Why? Where is she? Is she okay?” Abby turned around quickly and manny saw the panicked look in her eyes
“She’s okay, it’s nothing like what you’re thinking.” He told her trying to calm her down from whatever she was thinking
“Her in Mel got into it in the Med tent, I guess Mel was talking some shit and your girl ripped her a new one. She rushed out real quick, rushed past me look like she was headed for your place, I’d look there first.” Manny explained
“Shit” Abby sighed under her breath, she scrubs her hand down her face and starts walking to the door
“Thanks Manny”
“Any time pendaja, go get your girl.”
Abby chuckled as she left but there was no humor behind it, she was worried she had to get to you quickly.
“Aye remind me not to piss your girl off she’s scary when she’s mad.” Manny called out to her not expecting an answer
“it was kinda hot” Manny mumbled to himself as he went to his assigned duties.
You were curled up in bed wearing one of Abby’s hoodies, you had your face buried in Abby’s pillow as you laid on your side. You were tired but you were wound up to even try and nap. You’ve never even heard yourself that angry before.
You were playing the events over in your head when you heard the open
“Baby?” You heard Abby call out worriedly
“Addy?” You called back from the bed sitting up
You heard her walking down the small steps to the bed
“There you are” she says more to herself when she sees you, the worried look on her face worsens as she see the way your cheeks and nose are red, the tear tracks on your face and the puffiness under your eyes.
“Oh baby girl” consoles as she rushes over to the bed, getting under the covers and pulling you to her so your head was on her chest. She has both her arms wrapped around you, one hand rubbing your back. She kisses your head.
“What happened today baby girl?” She asks you
You sigh “I was working med tents today and Mel was saying some shit about you and that pissed me off and I just I don’t know I just lost it and went off on her.” You tell her.
“I’m sorry Abby” you sigh
“For what? From what it sounds like you didn’t do anything wrong” Abby was confused if anyone had to apologize it was Mel
“You’ve been trying hard to fix things up with her and I ruined it for you.”
“Well if she was talking shit about me behind my back then I don’t think I’ve been fixing it to well huh?” Abby chuckles humorlessly
“Baby you have nothing to be sorry for, If anything I should apologize to you. You shouldn’t have to fight my battles for m-“
She’s cut off by your lips
“I will always defend you, no matter what.” You tell her
She gives you a small smile and kisses you again
“Let’s just lay here for now, maybe take a nap or something and then we can deal with this later, huh how does that sound?” She asks as she kicks off her shoes and lets them fall to the floor, then her pants, leaving her in her shirt and boxers.
“Hmm that’s the best idea you’ve had in days.” You tell her and you both chuckle as you roll onto your side feeling her arms wrap around you and pull you to her. Her front against your back.
With Abby with you it feels like everything might just turn out okay.
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astrophileous · 7 months
Note
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I need anything fluffy (and I mean the most stomach churning, toe curling, quiet screaming fluff please 🥴🩷) for professor!spencer because I am actually frothing at the mouth DO YOU FEEL ME🗣️‼️ (mwah ily kith kith)
I might have written two blurbs for this request and I might have driven myself crazy trying to determine which one I should post so here's to wishing I didn't make the wrong choice 🤞 this one is special for you avis I hope you enjoy it MWAH 💖
Warning(s): gn!reader, I imagine reader being in grad school but you can imagine reader in college as well--that just means there's gonna be an age gap in there, if professor-student romantic dynamics isn't your thing you shouldn't be reading this, profanities(?), established relationship
This blurb was written as a part of the "Zara's Birthday Bash and Road to 1K" celebration.
Zara's Birthday Bash and Road to 1K Masterlist / Criminal Minds Masterlist
Have a good day, my love.
You grinned giddily at the text message popping up on the screen of your phone. Without wasting another second, your thumbs moved swiftly over the keypad as you typed in a response.
You too, honey. See you tonight at dinner <3
"What are you so smiley about?"
You quickly shoved your phone into the pocket of your pants before looking up towards the owner of the voice. Gladys stood to your left with a quizzical tilt to her eyebrows. Her eyes assessed you from head to toe before they landed back on your face.
"I'm not smiley. Who's smiley?"
"You are." Her eyes squinted. "Something smells fishy."
"You should check your bag. Maybe you accidentally threw your cat's wet food in there again."
"That was one time!"
Gladys scampered after you as you made your way into the lecture hall. Akbar was sitting on the third row when you walked in, immediately scooting over to make room for both Gladys and you to slip into your respective seats.
"Hey, did you guys hear?" Akbar asked as soon as you and Gladys plopped down next to him.
"Hear what?" Gladys asked.
"Apparently, some people are saying that Professor Chuckie is hitched."
Gladys' eyes grew comically wide. "He's what?"
Your brain was working in overdrive, trying to decipher whom exactly Akbar had meant by Professor Chuckie. Between him and Gladys, the two of them had a tendency of coming up with dozens of ridiculous code names for every single person they ever encountered in life, to the point where you were constantly struggling to keep up with them all.
"Who's Professor Chuckie again?" you eventually asked.
"Chuckie? From Rugrats?" Gladys hinted.
Your frown deepened. "Who?"
"Oh my God, (Y/N)." Akbar sighed. "You know the man. Fluffy curly hair like Chuckie from Rugrats."
After swimming in a pool of confusion for the next few minutes, Gladys eventually took pity on you and blurted out, "It's Professor Reid, (Y/N). Professor Spencer Reid from Criminology department?"
Your stomach dropped to the floor.
How did they—
"A buddy of mine was at the criminology lab today and told me that everyone was talking about it," Akbar explained. "The Spencer Reid is married. It's a huge news."
"Damn right, it is." Gladys scoffed. "Why are all the fine men in my life already taken? I hate it here."
Akbar rolled his eyes. "Right. As if you ever had a chance with him anyway."
As your two friends proceeded to bicker with one another, you felt yourself sinking deeper into a temporal abyss as your brain tried to process what Akbar had just said.
Spencer Reid is married.
Everyone was talking about it.
A lump formed at the base of your throat as you faced Akbar again, "Hey, how did they—how did your friend find out that Professor Reid was married?"
"He showed up to work with a ring this morning."
Your heart was racing inside your chest. "That's it? Not a very conclusive evidence, isn't it? Maybe the man just likes his jewelry."
"Nah, I'd bet my money that he's hitched," Akbar said. "My buddy told me one of the students tried to ask him about it and he just kinda smiled and nodded. Never really answered the question, though."
"That does sound kinda sus," Gladys opined. "Makes me wonder what kind of person managed to bag a specimen like that."
You hummed distractedly in reply, too busy mulling over everything to actively participate in the conversation your friends were having. Your professor strode into the hall barely five minutes later, and before long, the class officially began, forcing you to shake off any irrelevant thoughts about Professor Chuckie and his ring from the deepest corners of your mind.
Today was the day every group in class had to present their last progress report before finals rolled around. As soon as the fifth group finished their presentation, you walked to the front of the class with Akbar and Gladys following closely behind.
Akbar stepped towards the desk, trying to connect his PC with the class projector. He fumbled with the cable for a few minutes before he sheepishly glanced at you and Gladys. "I don't think it's gonna work. Either of you brought a laptop today?"
"I brought mine," you announced. "Wait here."
You ran back towards your table to grab your laptop before connecting the device to the projector. As soon as the desktop of your laptop appeared on the big screen, the entire lecture hall suddenly erupted in a round of synchronized gasps.
Gladys was staring at you, a clear sign of shock on her countenance. "(Y/N)?"
"Dude," Akbar muttered breathlessly. "What the hell?"
You swept your gaze repeatedly between the two of them and the rest of the class, confusion dawning inch by inch with every second that ticked by. "What? What's going on?"
Akbar nudged your shoulder, gesturing you to look behind towards where the projected screen of your laptop was being shown to everyone in the room. Your mouth instantly ran dry when you realized what had the whole lecture hall so stunned for the past few minutes.
It was a picture—the one you had set up last week as the wallpaper of your PC desktop but somehow had managed to completely forget about—of you and Spencer lounging on the living room couch of your shared apartment, holding up your hands to show off the identical bands encircling your ring fingers. Spencer was smiling big towards the camera with a protective arm wrapped around your shoulders while you peeked behind his neck with a portion of your face concealed behind his untamed curls.
It was a sweet photo to commemorate the most important day of both of your lives, taken merely hours after you exchanged vows at the city hall and entrusted each of your own hearts towards the other person to keep, nurture, and love.
And now, that same photo was up on the wall of Room 2404 as an impromptu spectacle for your entire Data Analytics class to see.
From behind the desk, Professor Clegg cleared his throat. "So, (Y/N). You and Dr. Reid, huh?" He peered at you from behind his glasses, not the slightest hint of a smile on his lips, but a brightly twinkling mirth in his eyes. "I guess congratulations are in order."
You exhaled a tired breath and replied, "Thank you, Professor."
Once your presentation was over, you retired back to your seat and discreetly typed in a message as another group came forward to present their work. You threw your phone into your bag after hitting send, trying to ignore the whispered demands of your two friends as they badgered you for answers.
Across the campus, Spencer's phone dinged with an incoming text.
He pulled out the device promptly, failing to contain his smile as he read the message you had just delivered to him.
Thanks a lot for the heads up 👎 Looks like there's no need for me to keep my own ring hidden in the wallet anymore >:(
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Text
More Important (Greg House x reader x James Wilson)
Summary: you not feeling well is far more important than work in your boyfriends' eyes
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Warnings: the reader is sick/doesn't feel good but it isn't specified the reason why so it's pretty much up for interpretation, House and Wilson are both loving and worried boyfriends, kind of hurt/comfort given the themes, brief and mild swearing, they/them pronouns are used to refer to the reader one (1) time in a gender neutral manner
A/N: I felt awful when I woke up the other day and when I went back to sleep I had a dream with House and Wilson that ended up inspiring this fic
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When you woke up that morning, every muscle in your body ached as if someone had dropped a sack of bricks on you while you slept. As much as you wanted to just stay in bed, you unfortunately had to get up to use the bathroom.
House was still asleep next to you, letting out the occasional peaceful snore despite the time indicating he'd be late for work if he didn't wake up soon. Not that he cared.
Wilson was already up and ready, from what you could tell. That assumption was later confirmed when you stumbled to the bathroom, the sight before you making it seem as though your boyfriend was being serenaded by the sound of the blow dryer as he fixed his hair.
"Are you almost done? I need the bathroom," you mumbled groggily, leaning up against the side of the doorframe while you waited for him to finish.
"Well, good morning to you, too," He responded in a voice that was far too chipper for your taste given how early it was. "And yeah, almost." He shut off the blow dryer and turned to face you, his big brown eyes studying you with a slight look of concern. Being a doctor, of course he could recognize when something was physically wrong.
"Are you okay?" He tentatively asked, trying to approach the subject in a delicate manner. After all the time he'd spent with House he knew not everyone wanted to talk about their feelings or even admit when something was wrong.
"Yeah, 'm fine. Jus' have a slight headache." Technically it wasn't a full lie, as your head did hurt, but you were greatly underexaggerating the pain level in hopes he wouldn't worry.
Big mistake. Almost as soon as you shut the bathroom door did Wilson turn and head towards the bedroom with the full intent of waking up your other boyfriend.
By the time you were done, both House and Wilson were standing close together, presumably discussing your supposed symptoms, even if you couldn't hear what they were saying.
"I know you guys are talking about me," you grumbled out the accusation while shuffling back over to the bed. Wilson looked a bit guilty to be talking about something involving you behind your back, but House just seemed amused you still had the energy required to dish out snark despite not feeling good.
"Whatever led you to that conclusion?" House asked rhetorically. "We very well could've been discussing what traffic will be like on the way in to work, or our favorite romantic movies." At that, Wilson rolled his eyes in annoyance. House ignored him, finishing with, "Not everything is about you, y'know."
"Don't play dumb with me," was the only thing you could manage to get out as a response given how tired you were. Collapsing onto the bed, you curled under the covers in hopes that maybe all you needed was a couple hours of extra sleep.
Too exhausted for your brain to work properly, you only picked up bits and pieces of their conversation. From what you could tell, they were trying to decide whether or not they should stay home from work to look after you, and if so who it should be out of the two of them.
"I'll stay here with them. Just tell Cuddy I can't come in today because of a medical emergency," House offered while glancing over at your blanket clad form. As much as he acted like he didn't care, he didn't enjoy seeing you in pain, even if it was over something small.
"Are you sure?" Wilson questioned, just to double check in case he wanted to change his mind.
House nodded his head to confirm, uttering "yeah, I'm sure" in an uncharacteristically soft voice.
You heard the sound of footsteps approaching, feeling as Wilson leaned down to press a kiss to your face, murmuring the words "I have to go to work, but I'll be back soon". You just nodded, too weak to say anything more than a quiet "love you".
After he left, House made his way back over to the bed, gently nudging what he assumed to be your leg with his cane. "Move over," he commanded in his usual gruff manner that led little room for argument.
Obliging, you shifted over on the bed, giving him the space to lay down in his normal spot. "Sorry."
He let out a sigh as he got on the bed, feeling a little bad he was so rude given just how pathetic you looked. "It's fine."
The two of you were quiet for a moment before you spoke up again, your voice sounding a little hoarse. "I'm sorry you got stuck here with me. I'm sure you'd rather be doing anything else other than this."
As much as he didn't want to admit it, hearing you say that hurt his heart a little. Then again, he couldn't necessarily blame you for thinking that. "Not true. Why would I want to be in a hospital full of sick people I don't even like when I could be with only one sick person I can at least tolerate?"
You let out a snort of laughter, fully recognizing the jest in his tone. He obviously cared, the grumpy bastard, even if he didn't show it very often.
He felt accomplished when he heard your laugh, continuing in a softer and more genuine tone. "Besides, some things are more important, anyway."
"Mhm." Humming softly in agreement, you moved closer to him on the bed until your head was resting against his shoulder, making sure to give him the space to get up and stretch his leg if he needed to later on. "I love you."
A faint smile formed on his face at your words, one of his arms reaching over to wrap around you protectively. "I know." It was his own way of showing his love for you without having to say the words.
Feeling comfortable and safe in his arms, you must've dozed off because the next thing you remembered was being woken up by the sound of a door opening and shutting.
"Could you be any louder?" House's irritated voice rang out through your ears, the sound not being entirely unpleasant even if it did manage to wake you up more.
"Sorry," you heard Wilson apologize in a hushed tone. There's no way it was evening already, which meant he must've gotten off work early.
"What are you doing back here?" You called out, your voice sounding tired yet curious. "You're supposed to still be at work."
"I couldn't stay knowing you were home sick," he responded as he slipped under the covers next to you, not even bothering to change into more comfortable clothes first.
"Oh, sure, just forget all about me," House complained in mock offense, something that Wilson chose to outrightly ignore.
"But the hospital- I mean, you're the head of oncology, you can't just-"
"Some things are more important," Wilson gently cut off your worries, his hand reaching out to rest on top of yours.
"Hm, that sounds familiar," you muttered while giving House a look that said 'I know you two have been talking about me again'. He looked back as if he had no clue what your deal was.
"Go back to sleep, honey. We'll both still be here when you wake back up." It was hard to ignore the command of the oncologist next to you, especially when he spoke in such a low and soothing way.
"Okay," you agreed without a fight, snuggling comfortably into the arms of your two boyfriends as you closed your eyes and allowed sleep to overtake you yet again, starting to feel a lot better already.
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End notes: I feel like I'm not very good at writing fics with poly couples which is a damn shame because I really love doing it </3
Likes < reblogs | comments are greatly appreciated | requests are currently open
Main masterlist | House MD masterlist | wanna be added to my taglist?
🏷 taglist: @pigeonmama
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andreafmn · 10 months
Text
Speak | Chapter 13
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Word Count: 3.1K
Summary: Bella Swan was a disaster when Edward had left. Deciding she needed a little help, Charlie Swan receives with open arms his younger daughter (Y/N) Swan. She helps Bella during her depression and becomes inseparable from her long-lost friend Jacob. What she didn’t expect was falling for a hotheaded short-tempered silver wolf.
A/N: I know I didn't post anything last week, but I wasn't feeling the best or very inspired. But I am posting this long awaited chapter early 😬😬 and y'all should know, we are getting closer to the long awaited truth reveal 🫣🫣 TAGLIST CLOSED check notes below as to why
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Paul didn’t know what his plan was. Storming into the Black house and wolfing out would not have been the most ideal situation, but he needed to do something. Jacob had done an unforgivable thing, and Paul would make sure he knew he had.
But anger was running through him too fast to be contained. As much control as he had mustered with (Y/N), Paul could feel it running out. And he knew the worse thing he could do was reveal the long-kept secret of the reservation to Jacob before his time. As much as he wanted the wolf inside him to rip the other boy to shreds, he knew better now than to let that kind of anger control him.
Still, he found himself putting his car in park on the long dirt road that led to the red cabin, his body shaking as he tried to keep the wolf at bay. He knocked on the front door harder than he had anticipated. The sound reverberated deep inside his ears, echoing the quick beat of his heart. If Jacob was the one to open the door, it was more than likely that his fist would collide with the boy’s jaw.
“Mr. Lahote,” Billy smiled, opening the door wide. “What a surprise to see you here. To what do I owe this pleasure?”
“Is Jacob around?”
“He is not,” the man responded. “He is most likely with his friend Quil still. But if there is anything I could help you with, please let me know.”
“I don’t think this is something you should know,” Paul struggled. “It’s… I don’t know. I don’t think you want to hear this.”
“Try me, Paul.”
The boy kept quiet for a second, mulling over whether telling Billy was the right thing to do. It was stupid and juvenile to speak of the problems between two people that –technically—had no business with him. It was not his place to air their quarrels out. “I think you need to talk to your son, Billy,” he sighed. “I don’t know what’s going on in his head, but he can’t keep doing what he’s doing.”
“What has he done, Paul?” Billy asked sternly, his fist gripping at the sides of his chair. “Something tells me this has to do with (Y/N) Swan. And I know my boy has not been the kind of person I raised him to be. So, please, do not sugarcoat things for my sake.”
“I really wish I could say that it is not my place to speak about this, but I can’t just stand by and let him hurt her.” Paul took a steadying breath, the coldness in the air stinging his lungs as it filled them. “Jacob went by to see her today, to get her to find a way to get Embry back into his group. But we both know why he has felt the need to take a break when it comes to their friendship. Now, I don’t know how he came to the conclusion that (Y/N) would be able to do anything, but he basically told her that if Embry didn’t come back, that he would break up with her. For good. And maybe it was an accident like she says, or maybe he knew exactly what he was doing. But he either pushed her, or he let her go, and she got hurt, Billy. The skin on the palms of her hands is completely broken, and she has a massive bruise that covers her entire hip. So, I am hoping that it was an accident and he didn’t see her. Because if I find out that he drove away after she got hurt and left her there, I might just take matters into my own hands.”
Something like a mix of anger and disappointment flashed across Billy’s face. A gaze that chilled even Paul. “I can’t believe this,” Billy scoffed. “That boy has truly lost his mind. Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Paul. Believe me when I tell you that the wrath of the gods will rain down on him. But I do want to ask you one thing, and I hope you answer truthfully.”
“Uh, sure. Anything.”
“Did you imprint on the girl?”
Paul felt his throat tighten at the mention of the bond. He had managed to get the pack to stop pestering him over telling her, and in two weeks, they had yet to mention the supernatural link that tied him to (Y/N). But, for some reason, he didn’t think that he was that easy to read.
He could have lied to the man. Tell him that (Y/N) was nothing more than a friend. That he didn’t want anything more than to make sure she was safe.  “I did,” he confessed. “But I haven’t told her about it.”
“I gathered as much,” he chuckled. “Would you care to indulge this old man for a quick chat?”
“I should be heading back,” Paul said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Patrol and everything.”
“Sam will excuse you for being late just this once,” the man smiled. “Please?”
“Uh, sure. I guess I can spare a few minutes. I'm already late as it is.”
He followed Billy inside, his steps tentative behind him. The elder pointed at his couch, inviting the boy to sit and listen. Something he was not good at. Listening to things he didn’t want to hear.
“First thing’s first, why haven’t you told (Y/N) about the bond? I figure it would make it a lot easier on everyone if she did.”
“I just…” Paul stammered, running his hands up and down his thighs to calm himself down. I don’t want her to be in the middle of this screwed-up world. I couldn’t live with myself if she ever got hurt because of our secrets. Much less because of me.”
“Doesn’t it hurt her more to keep her shielded from things that involve her?” Billy retorted. “(Y/N) is a special girl, and she has been stuck in the shadow of her sister for as long as I can remember. Unfortunately an afterthought to the Swans. I thought that my son would be the one to help her see her worth. That he would care for her in a way I don’t think she believes she deserves.” He took a second to sigh deeply, calming the anger that was bubbling inside him. “I will admit that I had hope that those two would work out because –between you and me—I’ve always had a soft spot for the girl. Having her be a part of my family in a more permanent way would have been great. But I can see that I was wrong about that. Now I understand that the affinity I thought she held for this land was because of you.”
“Getting closer to her will only hurt her in the end,” Paul said, his gaze dropping to the hands on his lap. “She needs someone that can be good for her. Good to her. I don’t think I am that person.”
“And yet the universe believes you are,” he offered. “I can’t say I felt the effects of the imprint bond. I didn’t even shift. But I’ve known love. And when things are meant to be, the universe finds a way to make it rightfully so. (Y/N) deserves to know there is someone out there that is on her side. Someone that will care for her unconditionally. Someone that only wants the best for her, even if it hurts them. She has a right to know about the things happening around her. Because at the end of the day, she is already in this world. Her sister ran with the Cullens and is friends with my son, who –given his behavior—might be getting closer to his shift; she is your imprint; she is still my Jacob’s girlfriend. This world is already happening to her. She just doesn’t know it yet.”
“What if that just pushes her away?” Paul worried. “It has been hard enough to build a friendship with her. I can’t lose that. I won’t lose her.”
“And what if it doesn’t? What if it brings her closer? She deserves the truth, Paul. And you know it can only come from you. I wouldn’t like to see what would happen if she was made aware by anyone else.”
“I… I’ll think about it,” he said, trying to convince himself that he would. Because everything Billy had said was true. She deserved everything and more, and maybe he could be the one to give it to her. At least a fraction. “But I do have to go now. Sam will probably have my head if I am another minute late.”
“I’ll give that boy a call,” Billy chuckled. “But I do hope you decide to tell (Y/N) the truth. It might open roads neither of you thought to walk down.”
Paul felt his head buzz with the words Billy spoke. As they joined the endless talks given to him by Jared and Sam, he knew avoiding the topic could only hurt them both in the long run. But the demons that breathed down his neck were too close for his liking. They held him in their grasp, their claws sinking into his skin every day that passed. He wasn’t sure if he could keep them at bay or even fight them out before they could make their way to (Y/N).
When he got to the Young cabin, he felt exhausted. Definitely not in the best shape to run around the woods in search of nothing. All he wanted to do was lay down and be done for the day. Or better yet, to run back to Forks and hold (Y/N) once again. For the first time since he had shifted, he wanted to avoid his responsibilities and put someone else first.
“Paul,” Sam’s voice broke through the silence of the night, surprisingly startling him. “I just received a call from Billy Black. Seems like you two had a talk.” 
The alpha joined Paul on the bench he sat on, not a single drop of anger in his demeanor. “I’m sorry for being so late tonight,” he sighed. “I’ll go on watch now.” 
“No need for that. Embry took your shift,” he said. “You should thank him for his beginner’s can-do attitude.” 
“I will,” he sighed. “Thanks.” 
“So, what happened?”
“(Y/N) got hurt, and she called me,” he shrugged. “We actually… well, we were together when you called. And then my anger took me to the Black residence.”
“I already knew all of that, Paul,” Sam reminded him. “I’m asking about all the things that happened that I don’t know about.”
“I don’t…”
“So, you’re all talked out for tonight? Or do you think you’ve heard enough?” 
Paul’s gaze fell onto the night sky, staring at the twinkling stars above. “I don’t think there is anything else to say about the matter,” he sighed. “It’s just me and my messed-up head to work through.”
“Well, I know a thing or two about messed-up heads,” Sam chuckled softly. “And there’s always something more to talk about, Pauly-boy. But only if you’re ready to confront those things that you fear so much.”
“I… I don’t think I am, Sam. Not right now.”
“Well then, can I ask the same question I have been for almost two months?”
“I haven’t decided yet on telling (Y/N) the truth. I just need a bit more time to think. To make the best decision for her. At the end of the day, all I want is the best for her. Even if it doesn't include me, Sam.”
Jacob walked into the house late that night, as carefree and nonchalant as ever. He was ready to shower off the day and lay down to rest, hoping that when he woke up the next morning, everything that had gone wrong would resolve itself. But he wasn’t expecting to find his enraged father waiting for him in the living room.
“Dad?”
“Sit down, Jacob,” he said sternly, his tone sharp and pointed. “Now.”
“What’s going on, dad? Why are you so mad?”
“I think you can guess, son. But I won’t make it too hard on you. This is in regard to (Y/N). The girl you claim is your girlfriend.”
“What about her, dad?”
“Acting dumb is not a good look on you, Jacob,” Billy said through gritted teeth, his cheeks growing red in anger. “But since that is how you want to play this. I’ll let you know that it had come to my attention that you have physically hurt her.”
“Look, I don't know what you think you know, but I didn’t do anything to her, dad. All I did was talk.” 
“Let’s say it was an accident, then. That she did slip on the ice, and you didn’t notice that she was hurt –which is a very unlikely scenario, boy. But you dangled your relationship in front of her like it meant nothing. You wavered it like a bargaining chip over something she had no control over. I don’t know who this is sat before me, but I can say this is not the son I raised.”
“And you’re gonna believe her over me, dad? I didn’t do anything like that,” Jacob whined. “All I did was go over to my girlfriend’s house to rant about my best friend avoiding me. Anything else is a complete fabrication. I…” 
“Enough!” Billy exclaimed. The man rubbed at his temples, his anger settling into his head, creating a pounding headache. “(Y/N) didn’t tell me anything. But I know a lie when I hear it, son. And I know that you have been dragging that poor girl along in hopes that something might happen with Bella. I turned a blind eye because I hoped you would fall for her in the same way she had fallen for you. But you have done nothing but break her down. That girl loves you, boy. And you don’t deserve that.”
“How can you say that? I’m your son.”
“My son would have never treated her that way. My son would have stayed to make sure she was okay when she fell. My son would not have used that poor girl’s feelings against her,” he reprimanded. “I told you to let her go if this was what you were planning. You have hurt (Y/N) enough, and I will need you to man up and tell the truth.”
Jake was at a loss for words. He was sure he had never seen his father with so much anger running through his eyes. But he couldn’t admit the mess he had made of everything. How things had gotten out of hand and had blown up in a way that he never expected them to. He couldn’t admit that everything he had done was wrong.
“I didn’t hurt anyone, dad,” he said instead of the truth. “Why don’t you believe me?” 
“I think it’s best if you head to bed now, son. I’ve heard all that I needed to hear.”
“Dad?”
“I need some time to cool down, Jacob. So, whenever you feel the urge, to tell the truth, you know where to find me,” his father said. “I’ll see you in the morning.” 
Back in the Swan residence, (Y/N) was finding it hard to fall asleep. Her hip felt like it was on fire, and her hands pulsed in pain. But it was the warmth that had been rushing inside her since Paul had been there that kept her up. She decided to tire herself with the TV, but it was the images in her head that she had been paying attention to. Her fingers were on her lips, trying to imagine just what would have happened if that call hadn’t come in.
She was back in the bathroom. Paul’s hands were still warm on her skin, her heart hammering on her chest. He’s right there. Only centimeters away from her. She can almost feel his lips on hers. She could already feel the warmness of his breath. Only this time, she does kiss him, and it makes sense. Kissing him feels right.
“(Y/N)?” Her father’s voice startles her out of her dreaming. A live representation of how much time had already passed. “What’re you doing still up?” 
“I couldn’t seem to find sleep,” she shrugged. “Figured the TV would fry my eyes into slumber as it seems to do for you but no such luck.”
“Very funny, kid,” he chuckled. Until his laughter died when he saw his daughter’s bandaged hands. “(Y/N), what happened?”
“I lost my balance on the driveway after Jake left and crashed onto the pavement,” she said. “I tried to catch myself with my hands, but I forgot I have Swan blood running through my veins, and clumsiness is in our genes. I scratched them up good, so I covered them up.” 
“Why didn’t you call me, kid? Are you hurt anywhere else? Do we need to go to the hospital?”
“God, dad, no,” she chuckled awkwardly. “I’m okay now. It’s all taken care of.”
“Are you sure? You know the hospital is open twenty-four hours.”
“I am sure, dad. I’m okay. Just a little banged up.”
Charlie slumped onto the armchair in defeat, exhaustion taking over his body. “Sometimes I feel like I am failing you girls,” he sighed. “I’m so over my head with this whole parenting thing, and you two are the ones paying the price.”
“No, dad…”
“You don’t have to guard my feelings, (Y/N). I know I’m not father of the year. I’m sure there are so many things I’ve missed since the time you’ve been here, just like there were so many things that I missed with Bella. And I can’t help but wonder if it would have been better if you had gone back home with your mom like it was originally planned.”
“As much as I love and miss mom, I don’t regret for a second coming here, dad. In the short time I’ve been here, Forks became home. It’s not perfect, much like no place could ever be, but it is home. And I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”
(Y/N) didn’t understand her feelings. She didn’t understand wanting Paul to kiss her. The complexity of liking to people at once hadn’t even crossed her mind because she didn’t think it was possible. Not in its entirety. And for the first time, she felt an ounce of relief at the prospect of Jacob leaving her. Maybe then she wouldn’t have to confront these confusing feelings and she could follow what felt right.
But it was only an ounce.
Next ->
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456 notes · View notes
whyse7vn · 10 months
Text
BABY FEVER -
[ ot7 x reader ]
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TAEHYUNG -
tae: have my cubs
y/n: STOP TALKING TO ME NOW
tae: i want 8
y/n: i’ve actually never been so srs in my life
let’s break up
like fr
i’m over this relationship i’m over you
tae: i can settle for 5 if it’s too much
y/n: let’s settle for a break up
tae: our little family 🥺
y/n: i would rather shoot myself
tae: why?
y/n: WHY?
are you really asking my why rn?
tae: yeah??
y/n: “have my cubs”
tae: i can’t get pregnant what is wrong with you
someone didn’t go to school 😭😭
y/n: who in their right mind says shit like that
tae: me??
y/n: stop talking to me
tae: babe
i’m being for real
y/n: i know
and i’m scared
tae: don’t be scared
i’ll protect you
and the kids
real alpha i am
y/n: stop
tae: are you getting emotional?
omg are you pregnant rn?????
hormones and that stuff?
is that what you wanted to say this whole time??
were you trying to hide it from me??
ur so cute >.<
y/n: i’m blocking you now
tae: we are gonna get through this together
do you think we need a bigger house?
y/n: genuinely are you ok in the head?
tae: ofc wtf??
i know ur not because of the pregnancy
but it’s okay
you don’t need to stress at all
i’ll think for the both of us
the love of ur life taetae be the sane one for the next 6 months
y/n: there is so much to unpack there
tae: omg have you been clothes shopping without me >.<
y/n: i am perfectly fine
you and sane don’t belong in the same sentence
never call yourself taetae again
and it’s 9 months not 6 you fucking idiot
tae: what is ur actual problem??
don’t swear around my child you’ll poison their mind
and i think i know more about babies than you do so just leave everything to me ok?
y/n: again i would rather shoot myself
tae: if you die i’ll protect the baby
y/n: there is no baby
tae: are you not ready to be a mother or something?
i swear we can do this babe
y/n: are you actually listening to me??
tae: ofc i am??
y/n: …
tae: i’m omw home btw can’t wait to see you both!!!!!!!
y/n: it’s like you only take in the information you want to hear
tae: i love you too
y/n: or maybe you just can’t read
tae: <333333333
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YOONGI -
yoongi: no
y/n: i don’t like when you read my mind like that
yoongi: no
y/n: i’m gonna ask anyways
yoongi: no
y/n: let’s have a baby 😁🙏🏽
yoongi: no
y/n: if we don’t have a baby now ur gonna be an old dad
ur gonna die before our baby turns 10
we don’t want that do we?
think of all the precious memories you’ll miss
yoongi: i’m fine with that
y/n: are you really?
yoongi: …
no
y/n: let’s have a baby rn
yoongi: but that’s so much work
y/n: #inittogether
our little baby made out of our love for each other
isn’t that sososoos cute yoongi 🥺
yoongi: i guess
y/n: so we’re having a baby?
yoongi: go away
y/n: ur not saying no
i’m taking this as a yes
i continue to win in this life
yoongi: what if you die before me
and i’m left with a baby?
y/n: the old thing really got to you huh?
yoongi: no i’m just saying you might die first
y/n: there is no way i’m dying first
ur literally 30
yoongi: and???
y/n: like jin is ur age mate that’s saying aLOT
yoongi: ur pissing me off
y/n: okay old bitch
yoongi: you expect me to have children with you after you bully me??
y/n: pls put me in ur will
i’m in jin’s yk?
yoongi: why are you in jin’s will?
y/n: why? mad ur not?
yoongi: how do you know i’m not
in his will?
matter of fact why tf does he have a will??
y/n: aren’t you an inquisitive one
yoongi: saying big words doesn’t make you look smart
y/n: jin knows it’s almost his time
you better start writing yours
yoongi: leaving everything to holly
y/n: i’ll literally cook holly
yoongi: what is wrong with you
y/n: i am not with child rn
that’s what’s wrong
yoongi: that sounded gross
never say that again
y/n: i’ve come to the conclusion that ur my biggest enemy
yoongi: i’m glad you know
y/n: ur dying
yoongi: ur next
y/n: don’t ever say that
i’m literally in my prime
yoongi: ur prime?
couldn’t tell
y/n: find someone else to carry your children
i can no longer stand the idea of mini yous running around
yoongi: ok :(
y/n: ??
don’t frown at me
you brought this on urself
yoongi: 😔
y/n: you bitch
yoongi: come make a baby with me 😄
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NAMJOON -
y/n: let’s have a child
namjoon: ok
y/n: i lied
namjoon: oh
y/n: what is wrong with you
namjoon: what is wrong with you?
y/n: did adding a question mark make you feel better bitch??
namjoon: very
y/n: this is why i lie to you
namjoon: that’s not nice
y/n: ur literally a nasty little gaslighter
namjoon: i’m not?
y/n: you are?
namjoon: if anything ur the gaslighter
y/n: fake claims i’ll sue
namjoon: you tell me you want to have children and then you tell me ur lying or you never said that
y/n: what is ur actual issue i’ve never said i want kids??
if you want kids ig we can talk about it but i’ve literally never brought that up
namjoon: see?
y/n: i see very clearly actually 20/20 vision the eye people told me
namjoon: you wear glasses?
y/n: occasionally
like what is ur issue?
ur so obsessed with me it’s not right
namjoon: ig i’m a little obsessed
y/n: it’s really not right
wait…
don’t you fucking wear glasses
what is ur issue four eyes???
namjoon: i do
i’ve never claimed to have 20/20 vision
y/n: ur blind as hell
namjoon: maybe i don’t want to have kids with you
they fr won’t be able to see anything
y/n: HOW DARE YOU SAY YOI DONT WANT KIDS WITH ME
YOURE SICK IN TBE HEAD
namjoon: put ur glasses on
ur spelling stuff wrong
y/n: it’s my charm
namjoon: not wearing ur glasses?
y/n: we need to go on a break
namjoon: how can we go on a break when we have kids to take care of?
y/n: and you say ur not a gaslighter?
what if i was a weak woman and fell for ur sick lies
namjoon: we would have kids by now
y/n: ur messed up
that’s so messed up
namjoon: shoot me
y/n: don’t say stuff like that
cuz i will
then you’ll be mad
and dead
namjoon: what are you bothering me for?
y/n: can i not just message my bf like omg?
namjoon: you miss me or something?
y/n: not anymore
namjoon: cute
y/n: fuck ur cute
namjoon: accepting a compliment won’t kill you yk?
y/n: stop communicating with me
namjoon: you messaged me first?
y/n: no i didn’t
namjoon: whatever
y/n: omg don’t speak to me like you hate me i’ll kms
namjoon: so kids?
y/n: idk what ur on about tbh
namjoon: fine
y/n: fine
namjoon: fine?
y/n: fine?
namjoon: idk what you want from me
y/n: children
namjoon: you stop communicating with me
y/n: wow
namjoon: yeah
y/n: ur a LOSER
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SEOKJIN -
jin: it’s time we reproduce
y/n: no
jin: no?
this would be a blessing to many
y/n: ok??
jin: ok?
i’ll just kms then
if you hate me just say that
y/n: i hate you
jin: what is ur problem???
y/n: what’s urs??
you told me to say it
jin: i said if you hate me
IF
y/n: ???
jin: oh my god
leave me alone
y/n: oh my god by gidle
jin: you have to stop speaking to hobi
y/n: why :(
jin: ur starting to talk like him
and it’s gross
the mother of my children a hoseok clone??
no thank you
y/n: what children??
jin: you need to keep up
we are having kids
y/n: but you said mother of your children
like as in you have kids rn
and last time i checked i never gave birth
who is this other woman seokjin???
jin: ew why would you say my full name like that
y/n: why would you cheat on me?
jin: bored?
y/n: all men are the same
jin: i am like no other man
y/n: true you dumb as hell
jin: now ur talking shit
y/n: maybe the shit talks you
jin: what
y/n: what
jin: can we make babies pls
y/n: ew
you actually make me wanna throw up
jin: wtf
this is why i don’t talk to you
y/n: you talk to me everyday?
in fact you loose ur mind if you don’t talk to me for more than 2 hours
jin: you literally have no proof
once again ur talking SHIT
y/n: don’t raise ur voice at me tf
jin: see you would be such a good mother
that’s such a parent thing to say
lowkey got me feeling a little hot and bothered rn 🙈
i’m sorry
you might need to put me in my place again mommy 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙉🙉🙉
y/n: what the fuck
jin: you’re not into it???
y/n: how can you go from talking about children to sex?
jin: don’t say that makes me sound like a perv
y/n: you are a perv
jin: no i’m not
ur just lame
like you need to have sex to have children
i was just helping start the process
y/n: you’ve got like a screw loose or something
jin: stop speaking to me in riddles
or don’t
i do love a smart girl 😉
y/n: stop speaking to me like a bitch in heat
jin: people lame nowadays
by people i mean you
y/n: cry about it
jin: i just might
y/n: good
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JUNGKOOK -
y/n: do you want to have a baby?
jk: doesn’t giving birth hurt?
y/n: so?
jk: i don’t want you to get hurt
y/n: life is pain
jk: i’ll give birth
y/n: that’s not how it works
jk: pls let me do it
y/n: ok
jk: thank you
y/n: ur welcome
jk: do you think i’ll look good pregnant?
y/n: idk
jk: will you still love me when i get big?
y/n: i might leave you if you get pregnant
jk: wtf?
y/n: it might creep me out
jk: why wtf
y/n: i don’t want to imagine you pregnant
jk: but our baby ☹️
y/n: i would rather never have kids than see you pregnant
jk: wow
you think i would be that ugly
y/n: i’m sorry
jk: are you?
y/n: ummm
jk: ok then
y/n: we can always adopt
jk: but that’s not my baby
y/n: legally they would be
jk: we won’t have the same spit
y/n: the same spit?
jk: yk like our insides won’t be the same
y/n: ur dna?
jk: yeah my dna
y/n: ur not supposed to have the exact same dna as ur baby anyways
jk: okay but it’s like a mix of us
and a adopted one would have no mix at all
y/n: so what do you want to do?
jk: give birth
y/n: i really don’t think it’s possible babe
jk: i will do it
y/n: sure
jk: why don’t you believe in me?
y/n: i do
jk: act like it
y/n: wooo?
jk: not good enough
y/n: sorry i’m tired
jk: ok?
y/n: fuck you?
jk: i’m about to have a baby and ur talking to me like that?
y/n: i’ll believe it when i see it
jk: so you fr don’t believe in me?
y/n: yeah
not one bit of belief in me
jk: crazy how people switch up
when you want to come back into me and MY babies lives we won’t let you
y/n: i’m crying
honestly
jk: i’m glad
y/n: i’m actually not
i don’t care at all
and that’s the truth
jk: so you just lie for fun
y/n: pretty much
jk: wow
ur crazy
y/n: 4 u
jk: waittt why am i blushing rn 😖
are you in love with me be honest?
y/n: idk…
jk: oh
y/n: embarrassing…
ur just a fuck buddy tbh
jk: for 8 years i’ve been a fuck buddy?
y/n: yur
jk: are you lying to me?
y/n: i could be
jk: i could be pregnant rn
y/n: are you?
jk: no
but i could be
y/n: are you lying to me?
jk: yeah :(
y/n: it’s okay
jk: is it really??
y/n: you don’t want me to answer that
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JIMIN -
y/n: i’ve been getting congratulation texts all day today
jimin: omg people are so crazy wtf 😭?
y/n: i’m fr so confused
did we win an award i didn’t know about or something??
jimin: maybe idk lol
y/n: would it be rude if i asked what tf they’re talking about?
jimin: unbelievably rude
don’t do it
i’m for real
y/n: but i wanna know
jimin: just accept the congrats and go
y/n: do you know something i don’t?
jimin: wtf no?
y/n. ur lying
jimin: i’m not
y/n: jimin
jimin: love of my life
apple of my eye
babe
y/n: tell me
jimin: omg i LOVE that song
tell me tell me ttttell me
y/n: now
jimin: sorry idk what ur talking about
hello??
babe?
where did you go?
come back
talk to me
y/n: YOU TOLD PEOPLE I WAS PREGNANT???
jimin: I TOLD YOU NOT TO ASK
WAHT IS WRONG WITH YOU???
y/n: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT
jimin: i’m preparing people for the future
y/n: ??????????
i’m NOT pregnant
jimin: you will be when i’m done with you ;)
y/n: wtf is wrong with you
jimin: a lot
y/n: i can tell
jimin: do you think i’m ugly be honest
y/n: right now yes
jimin: so you think i’m pretty other times 🥺🥺🥺
let’s have a baby
y/n: no
jimin: okay wtf
why not
y/n: ur literally about to be shipped off
you want to leave me with a baby??
jimin: why would you say that
now i’m upset
i’ll take the baby with me
y/n: …
jimin: no?
y/n: no
jimin: fine
our baby would be lowkey ugly anyways
y/n: excuse me?
jimin: problem?
y/n: why would our baby be ugly??
jimin: i mean…
y/n: you mean????
jimin: ur gonna have to just prove me wrong babe
y/n: ur not funny
jimin: did i make a joke???
y/n: you are the joke
jimin: i actually am not the joke
i never joke
super serious guy park jimin is
super shy too
new jeans core >.<
y/n: i’m done with you
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HOSEOK -
y/n: baby?
hobi: me?
y/n: no like an actual baby
hobi: ur having one?
congrats!!!!!
y/n: no??
i’m not having one
hobi: oh
i’m sorry for ur loss
y/n: there was no loss
hobi: oh
was there a gain?
y/n: do you want there to be?
hobi: depends on the gain
y/n: the gain would be a baby
hobi: yikesss
that’s a pretty lame gain
why would i want you to have a baby?
y/n: um because you love me?
hobi: i wouldn’t be the father
i don’t see the point
y/n: ???
why wouldn’t you be the father?
hobi: i thought you were asking me if you could have a baby with someone else
y/n: what?
hobi: what?
i’m confused
y/n: I’M confused
hobi: why are we confused??
y/n: why would i ask you if i could have a baby with someone else???
hobi: feminism?
tho i do think it would be more of a feminist move if you didn’t ask me
ur spirt was in the right place tho
i’m sure the women will forgive you
y/n: what?
hobi: was i wrong??
y/n: what do you think?
hobi: it’s not my place to decide for a strong woman like urself
y/n: get a grip
hobi: grip gotten
y/n: is this ur way of dodging my baby proposal?
hobi: a baby what?
that sounds wrong
tf is a baby doing proposing???
ur a baby like drink milk or something
y/n: are you drunk??
hobi: nooooooooooooooooooooooooo
y/n: so ur tipsy?
hobi: tipsy topsy who cares
y/n: i do
i’m trying to ask you if you want to have a baby with me oh my god
hobi: omg do you love me or something???
that’s so crazy
y/n: bye have fun drinking
hobi: drinking heals me
y/n: that’s concerning
hobi: will i be a good dad
y/n: i’m sure you will
hobi: or will i kill myself due to the stress
y/n: oh
hobi: let’s find out babe
i’m ready
y/n: that did not sound like ready talk to me
we can talk about this tomorrow
hobi: if we think about it what can a baby do that i can’t???
y/n: keep me company
hobi: i do that all the time
do you hate me
if you hate me say 1
if you hate me and want me dead in a ditch by saturday night say 7
y/n: where are you right now?
hobi: jin’s house
i think
y/n: you think?
anyways
that’s the point
i’m all alone a baby would never leave me to go drink with jin
hobi: jin would be dead by the time our baby was born
he’s old
dojn’t tell him i said that
he might kick me out
i would be so upset
like this :cccccccccccc
and this 😭😭😭😪😓😓😓😰😰😨😨
WOAHHH THIJS DRINK HITTING OH MY GOD BABE WOW
FEELS LIKE I JUST DID COKE
OH MY GOF
not that i’ve done cokr befr don’t be scared of me babe
y/n: wow okay!
hobi: babies can’t even dance to dynamite i don’t see why you would want that in ur life
and i totally can dance to dynamite
sO i win
y/n: you are so right babe you go and have fun with jin!
hobi: see ur just so silly
and btw i realllly donnt do coke i swear it
y/n: 7
hobi: OH MY GIF I KNEW ITT
487 notes · View notes
savannahsdeath · 9 months
Text
SOCCER!ELLIE WILLIAMS X CHEERLEADER!READER
PART 3THREE
part 4four
part 2two
mdni please<3
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summary: ellie hoped to get her reward even though she didn't win the match, but someone really looked forward to ruin her plans, and potentially, change your whole life
warnings: i think its minors safe?? mentions of cheating tho !!
writers note: meow meow its a short chapter again plus everything happens pretty fast cuz im impatient🩷
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you watched as the both teams shook hands, acknowledging the game's conclusion and the tie.
ellie ran over to you and the other cheerleaders, smiling. she looked exhausted, but she was still happy to see you.
"you know, i could still use that kiss." she joked.
"but you didn't win." you smirked, handing her your water.
you remembered how just yesterday you hated her for taking the bottle, and the fact you're the one offering it now was hilarious.
she also seemed to think about that, as she hestitated before drinking it.
"yeah, but..." she stopped to completely down the liquid in just a few sips. she must be really thirsty. "but i didn't lose, either."
ellie looked around. "she's somewhere around here, isn't she?" she asked with a smirk, and you instantly knew who is she talking about. "i need to shove these results in her face."
you shrugged and tried to change the topic. "anyway, back to what i..."
ellie looked you up and down before cutting you off. "one kiss. it's all i want."
she raised an eyebrow at you, clearly expecting a response.
"so is that it?" you chuckled. "you just wanted to make vi mad?"
ellie defensively raised her hands. "no, no. that's just a great bonus."
you laughed at ellie's response, but you knew that there was more to it than that.
ellie had spent the entire match trying to win your recognition. she didn't just want to make vi mad. she wanted to win you - your attention.
"fine." you agreed with a smirk. "i shouldn't, but i'll give you your hard-earned kiss."
you reached out towards ellie, bringing her slowly closer and closer.
you could both feel the anticipation in the air. ellie's breath hitched, and she held her breath as you both moved in for the kiss. your mouths met softly yet passionately, as your lips pressed together and ellie's tongue explored your mouth. you could feel her excitement and her desire for you, and you began to feel the same for her.
the cheering from the crowd faded away as the two of you were caught up in the moment.
a sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted you. you pulled away, heavily breathing, to see vi.
"i just wanted to congratulate you, ellie." she clicked her tongue and crossed her arms.
vi was clearly annoyed by the situation, as she looked at her rival with disdain.
"why do you always take things too far?" she asked ellie. "this match was supposed to be about scoring goals, not about scoring dates."
you both stayed silent, not wanting to start an argument. but maybe it'd be necessary.
"i'm glad to see you two having such a great time together." she said dryly, giving ellie a hard stare.
it was clear that vi was still trying to win you back, and it was also clear that she was bitter about the situation.
ellie looked annoyed by your ex's comment, as she knew exactly where vi's anger was coming from. ellie's face was still flushed from the kiss, but she didn't let it bother her.
you didn't even notice when other students and players left the field, leaving you almost alone.
"thanks for your concern, but we don't need it, alright?" ellie replied, rolling her eyes.
"you should be careful with her." vi warned ellie, sternly looking at her. "or you'll end up like me, being known as a cheater."
her rival laughed, shrugging it off. "not going to happen."
she pulled you closer, almost as if she wanted to keep you away from this.
"why so sure?" your ex put on a mockingly curious expression. "maybe you're feeling safe because you're the one who made up this little gossip?"
your eyes widened at vi's accusation.
"you did cheat on me, don't deny it." you shook your head.
"oh, of course i did!" vi sarcastically smiled. "did you never wonder why the first ones to call me a cheater were people from ellie's team?"
as soon as vi saw she got to you, she simply walked away, mumbling a proud; "i see you two have some explaining to do."
"ellie..." you started softly. "just tell me- is it true?"
she looked down, and for a moment, she seemed like she was about to lie. but then she took a deep breath and sighed.
"yes, i did." she looked at you and shrugged. "i was jealous, okay? the only thing i could think of was to sabotage her, so i made up that whole story about her cheating to get you to spend less time with her." she frowned, looking away.
"i'm sorry."
not only you just found out you broke up with someone you loved because of a false rumour, but it was ellie who spread it too. the same ellie you cheered on for the past months. the same ellie who, you thought, hated you the whole time. and here you are, finding out she's the one who ruined your relationship, because she liked you.
you were in disbelief. you felt stupid, and hurt. but more than anything, you felt betrayed by someone you, well, didn't really care about, but trusted. because you met up everyday after classes and no matter how much you pretended to hate her, you knew a lot about her.
ellie saw the look on your face, and the weight of her antics got to her. you never saw her so... vulnerable before.
"i'm so sorry." ellie repeated, her voice awkwardly quiet. "you have a right to be mad at me, but, please, keep in your mind that i didn't do this to hurt you." she took a step towards you. "i just...i liked you, and i didn't know what do you see in her."
"i need to-" you hestitated for a moment, taking a step back to make up the distance between you both. "i need to think about- everything. alone."
she opened her mouth as if to speak, but you cut her off by raising your hand.
"i know." you nodded.
you didn't know what was she thinking - that no one will find out eventually? you didn't know how is it possible her team just played along, making everyone in school believe it too. you didn't know how did she even come up with this idea. but you knew what she was going to say, you knew she's sorry. she already told you two times. enough.
it's good to know you're not the only hurt one, though.
"i know." you repeated, quieter this time, and it seemed like you were whispering it more to yourself than to her. because that's how it was. you were trying to convince yourself you do know and you understand.
she fucked up, really, but at least she knew that.
you could hear a quiet "m'kay." and the sound of a disappointed sigh.
so guys what do we think?? are we being in a generous mood and forgiving ellie?? are we trying to give her a little lesson?? <3<3
TAGS: @wandasromanova @bellaramslover @aouiaa @glennns-blog @elliewilliamsfuckbuddy @iheartsadiesink @ximtiredx @coff1nn @jowdann @simpforellie @iveofficiallylostmymarbles @skylerwhitwyo @pinkigirl @islalips @ratdungeon @okayyesbutno @dinoastronaut @ucannotcompare @elyonz @lesbiantothemoonandback @lovejuliettq more i cant tag for unknown reasons:(
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mrsnancywheeler · 4 months
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the river (4) // finnick odair x f. reader
summary: the Capitol has taken you away from Finnick, the life you've been trying to build together and now he has to fight to get every part of you back
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warnings: angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, talks of trafficking and abuse related to it, aftermath of breakups, mentions of torture, self destructive behavior, mental illness, unedited, no use of y/n, underage drinking, paranoia
𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒
“I'm hurting you, real or not real." It's been days of this, of Finnick trying to bring you back to him. Half the time you were fine, you'd try to go over the past with him, joke, and open up, so he'd do the same. He had to be so careful though, it wasn't clear what exact things would set it off, but you'd get so paranoid about him and the doctors. Occasionally they'd be able to calmly bring you back, ground you back into the firmness of reality. The other times you'd devolve completely, screaming, crying, hysterical, and Finnick would have to step away as you'd get worse when he was close by. It was an exhausting, never-ending cycle, but it was worth trying to get you back.
Today you'd let his chair be by your bed, but now he was scared he'd be forced to retreat. He had to be careful, if he lied you might be able to see it in his face and be convinced he was lying about other things, or he could tell the truth and risk the spiral of guilt. “Real." He knotted his rope, staring down at it for a second.
“I'm sorry, I don't mean to or want to. I'm really sorry." You're crying and he's thinking, oh shit, so early in the morning and now a whole day of what could've been progress will be lost.
He stared at you, trying to portray as much genuine feeling as possible, “I know that, angel, I don't blame you. I could never blame you and have never blamed you." It hurt to be so close yet so far away, he could reach out and touch you, but he knew better. Not like you always told him when you did want him to hold you though, some days you communicated well, but others it was like you forgot that he needed explicit permission to come close. You'd get grumpy when he couldn't just tell you wanted him closer and do as much. Truthfully it was adorable, and it reminded him of the past, but that also made his heart ache. He couldn't just make an inference anymore on the off chance it sent you into a frenzy, so he'd have to sit by and wait.
“You should, I'm so fucked in the head, and you deserve better."
“Well I'm pretty fucked in the head too, sweet girl, and there is no one better." You were hiccuping on your sobs, this could go badly so quickly. “Hey, it's okay, we're okay, why don't you take some deep breaths with me, angel? Look at me, just follow what I do, deep breath in, deep breath out." He urged you to look at him and you did, trying to follow along through the tears until finally you were somewhat calmed down.
“I'm sorry." You sniffled, wiping away stray tears.
“It's okay, sweet girl, we're gonna have a good day today, right?" The last couple had been rough, so strenuous for the both of you. You nodded slowly, “Maybe they'll let us take a walk or eat lunch with everyone else. Would you like that?”
"I don't know.” Your knees curled up into your chest.
"That's okay, we don't have to take that step yet if you don't want to. We can just talk or sleep or I can teach you some knots, and whatever else we can think of.” You shrugged and he had to realize that it could be a good day, but it probably wasn't going to be an easy one. With you in one of your difficult moods that he'd be left to handle. You'd say no even if you wanted something, silently expect him to come to the conclusion himself, and if it had been before the Capitol dug their talons in it would've been fine. He would've teased you about it before giving into your quiet plea for attention and he would've relished it because it meant you wanted comfort instead of only comforting him. Now though he didn't know what you were thinking, he had assumptions but the risk of being wrong was too great. “We have to use our words, angel, and if that's too hard you can write it down."
You said nothing and laid your head down on your knees, shaking it. Finnick shifted in his seat, rubbing his head, he didn't want to be annoyed with you, but it had been bad day after bad just to lead to this. He was exhausted and hated Snow for making him work so hard just to have you back again. “Please, don't be mad at me.” Your voice was so broken and so soft that he regretted even showing any form of annoyance.
"Angel, I'm not mad at you. I just can't help you unless you tell me what you want or need.” You ever so quietly let out a small huff as you laid down instead, staring at the ceiling. At least you weren't screaming until you needed to be sedated, you were just having a hard time communicating your needs. Finnick was sure all you wanted was to be held, in the past that's what it usually had been. “Is this making you feel embarrassed, honey?" Sometimes the switch between trying to push down your own needs for solace had left you like this, difficult to feel like you deserved to be consoled. Now though, he reasoned, it was because you felt like such a burden.
"I don't know what's going on in my head and everything is so conflicting. I just want to be me again so I know what I want, and you know, and I don't know it's too much. And I want to say things, but I can't because I just want people to see me as I was and know." His poor, sweet girl having to fight all the inner turmoil. You felt different, but you weren't. You were just struggling and wanted things to be the same as they had before, he knew that, but he also knew that they couldn't be until there were less breakdowns, less paranoia.
He had to suck it up and just give what he was so sure it was at the risk of another breakdown if he got closer, but the alternative was a different type of breakdown. “Do you want me to lay with you again?” You played with your fingers and nodded, so he slipped in beside you. He knew there was more from the way you looked at him and hoped he wasn't pushing boundaries, that he was right. "Angel, do you want to be held?” You finally smiled just a little bit when you nodded, grateful, and he smiled back,"Come here, sweet girl.” The moment his arms were around you your head snuggled into his chest, it felt perfect, the way you two were meant to be.
"Don't let me go."
“Wouldn't dream of it." He hadn't touched you in so long it was like heaven in his arms again. “You ready to talk now, sweet girl? Wanna tell me what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?"
"I'm sorry I'm so difficult for everyone, I don't know what going on in my head half the time anymore.” Your voice vibrated through his chest and it was so comforting to him.
“You're just trying to get better, it's okay. And you can ask me, angel, you don't have to sit with it in your head and let it eat you up. You can just ask me if it's real.” His fingers traced circles on your shoulder, you were so cold all the time, it made him feel less hot and stuffy
“I'm safe, real or not real?"
“Real." Safe from the arena, the Capitol, the only thing you weren't safe from was yourself.
“Okay." You snuggled yourself further into him, like you trying to let yourself believe it. “When I was in the Capitol…” Finnick's ears perked up,"I'd try so hard to keep myself in reality, and I'd think about that time we took that tiny, crickety rowboat out and you said it would be romantic. So you packed up your fishing rod and we'd been out for a couple of hours when it was probably time to row back. So I said I'd take one of the oars-”
"Because you insisted I deserved to rest since it was so hot and I'd rowed us out, which I wasn't, but you gave me that cute little pout so I let you have one.” Of course he remembered this, even if three years ago felt like an eternity.
"You were tired!”
"That's subjective.” You scoffed, but he could hear you smiling.
“Anyways, right after you give me the oar you started kissing me-"
“You just look so cute when you pout like that and you were shining in the sun, like an angel, I had to."
"But you distracted me and I got so caught up in it because you were being an ass, started leaning me down.” He does remember his diabolical plan when you were sitting down sweetly on that little row boat, trying to help him, he just wanted to lay you right down and show you how appreciative he was.
"And you dropped the oar, sweet girl, wasn't my fault.”
"Yes, it was, you distracted me and then you tilted your body when you heard the splash to see what happened and so I did the same. Which made the boat tip over and left us both in the water.”
“And you just started laughing, I couldn't even be worried about you because your sweet little laugh was the first thing I heard. I just swam right over and had you in my arms, started laughing with you, and the only way I could get you to stop was by kissing you.”
"And then you wouldn't let me help you get the oars and row boat back up.”
"You're so pretty, sweet girl, would rather watch you while I'm on task, we saw what happened when that doesn't happen.”
"That was your fault!” You exclaimed, he could feel your smile on his chest.
“Maybe, but it was worth it.”
You hummed in response, one of your hands playing with the fabric of his own medical gown. "And then you insisted I had to get on first and I didn't know how you did it but somehow you got me in the row boat again before climbing back in, without it tipping over, it almost did, but not completely. And it was so hot that it was drying us off completely when you rowed us back with that beautiful, goofy smile on your face the whole time.”
“Couldn't help myself, you're so beautiful, love to look at you, angel."
“And only after we got to shore and you were insisting on carrying the whole boat by yourself did I notice I'd lost one of my sandals." You let out a small laugh into his chest that made his own smile brighten. “So you told me it was another reason I couldn't carry the boat even though it didn't bother me. We'd lost all the fish so we just ate grapes and giggled as you tried to figure something else out."
“I sat you on the counter and you just smiled like you were the sun, so I'd sneak kisses in while I worked. We decorated that rowboat together, do you remember?"
You nodded into his chest, eyebrows scrunched together. “With flowers and seashells?"
“Yeah, good job! Flowers, seashells, fish, the ocean waves, our handprints, and I carved our initials into it too."
Your voice become somehow even softer, “So when I was in the Capitol I'd think about how refreshing the water felt when the sun was beating down on us, how it felt and tasted when you kissed me, how you held me, the sound of you laugh, how special you made me feel by taking care of me. I'd think about that day to try and stop me from slipping away, for a while it worked."
You never ceased breaking his heart and making him fall deeper in love with you. "Well you're still here with me, haven't really slipped away from me.”
"I feel like I have, that I've slipped away from even knowing myself.” You admitted, voice croaky.
“You've just fallen and we're helping you back up, angel, I'm putting you back in the boat. Maybe it'll rock, but I promise you, it won't tip again."
𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒
His life was hell with you gone because now there was nothing but the ever present loneliness to return too. There wasn't a day that seemed to pass where he didn't think of you in some way. Sometimes it was how much he missed you, others it was fantasies of still being together, and the worst ones were when he'd imagine your life without him. It was terrible when the breakup had begun and he had his first party because everybody had been drawn to you.
“Where is she, is she not feeling well because I can stop by."
"You can't have let that one go, Odair, she was perfect for you.”
"Finnick, she was my drinking buddy!" People admonished him left and right when it was finally revealed that he'd dumped you. Although he was pretty sure people were more upset about the lack of your magnetic presence.
Initially he tried to play it off like his Capitol persona would have, you were just one of many girls lined up for him, and the committal part had scared him off, and you were so clingy. The rumor mill caught it and so many girls were ready to be next. He felt like he was betraying you every time he sent a flirty smirk back to whatever they said to draw him in. So he gave up the persona, he'd rather be mournful and drink away the problems each night.
Then he'd heard that Tallulah still saw you, she'd grab a bottle or two and sneak out to tap on your window. That way she still had someone to take care of her afterwards and she trusted you with the role. “Lulah please tell me what she says, I don't care what about, just anything. I'm begging you." Finnick was tipsy and felt like he was going to cry, but Tallulah pursed her lips.
“Finnick, I don't think that's a good idea.” She took another sip of her drink.
"I'll do whatever you want, please. I'm not asking you to pass messages or anything.” She must have taken pity on him and his tears when she agreed. So he soaked up anything you'd said the next time he saw Tallulah.
“I don't think you want to know."
“I do, I don't care what it is."
“Finnick, if you're already this beat up about it, I'm not sure telling you what she said will help.”
“That's okay, I deserve to feel bad about it."
Tallulah sighed, " People talk Finnick, so the things you'd said about her kind of, you know, got back to her.”
Finnick looked up as if it would stop the tears from falling,"No, no, no, no I didn't mean that. She has to know I didn't mean that.”
"But you said it.” Tallulah shrugged. "She kept asking if I thought she was too clingy or overbearing, sometimes she'd ask if you had someone else and then decided she didn't want to know.”
"No, never.” He said quickly and hated himself for leaving his sweet girl only to cause her even more pain from afar.
“If you're gonna leave a girl, you have to leave her, Finnick. Or you're both gonna spend your whole lives wishing for things when you could just move on. I'm not gonna do this again, just let her have Conway. It's always been them.”
"I know, that's okay.” But it wasn't because Finnick Odair was like a moth to a flame. Any time he could see or hear about you he would. He remembered when nearly a year later you'd started dating Beckett, the same goddamn Beckett that had drawn Finnick to you in the first place. He'd been jealous for a myriad of reasons he had no right to. At least it wasn't Conway, at least if you stuck with Beckett it was a different ending then the expected, the obvious route.
But god, did Finnick hate him. Because he represented you trying to move on, that Finnick didn't have a future with you, and worst of all that other people found you just as intriguing as he did. So when he'd walk the market in circles just to see Beckett shamelessly flirting with you and in your way, you'd flirt back. Maybe he was vain, but Finnick liked to imagine that you did it so he'd be jealous and take you back, even if that could never happen. Beckett had to know it affected Finnick too, who only maintained terse conversation or made jabbing comments towards the other boy.
Until finally whatever excitement you got from it burnt out and you told Beckett it wouldn't work. Leaving Finnick to wonder if it was wrong that he hoped it was because you realized you could never love someone as much as you loved him. It was probably fucked to want, but he needed to know so desperately that you were as longing for him as he was for you. His life condemned him to longing glances and whispers of your name over the ocean waves, but at least you would be safe. Maybe he'd find you in another lifetime, right person, wrong time. Then you could be safe and happy.
Instead he realized the universe didn't expect either of your lives to be ones of just the parted lovers, whatever he'd done in a past life, was coming back for blood. He should've known Snow would realize Finnick thought of you with every breath he took, that he still thought of your lips instead every time he was in the company of a customer, and that it would lead to more tragedy. Because when the fated reaping for the 69th Hunger Games began, it was your name sent into the labyrinth of death.
Any light left in his life had been aggressively ripped from him, it was as if everytime he thought he'd hit rock bottom the ground would crumble beneath him and the falling would resume. At least he knew you were smart, he was privy enough to the clockwork of you to know that you were terrified, but to anyone else you would've looked so calm and collected. Then you looked at him and he felt like the ground was breaking again, another thousand feet to fall. It was like you were sending him a love letter before you went off to certain death.
Tides were always changing, they could sweep you away or reveal the gorgeous curiosities of the waters, Finnick wasn't sure what it was when the second tribute's name was called. Conway. Why was he inescapable? If the stars destined you and Finnick to be tragic lovers, then Conway was always there to rock the boat. But through your eyes, glistening with tears, he sees the plan almost formed. Never has he been so grateful that his sweet girl could easily put on a brave face to handle anything, that you're used to using charisma as a way to fend for yourself, because that means success in the Capitol and you need that.
So although he wished your eyes had stayed on him, blessed him, instead they could do what he needed. Make you interesting enough for sponsors. He knew Conway deserved better, but how could he focus on him when you were right there? His sun, his moon, the stars in the sky, you were absolutely everything, so there was no time to think about what Conway deserved or didn't.
Finnick could easily craft your image to others. He was certain of it, he could sing your praises night and day, so it would be far from difficult to convince the Capitol that you were the model victor. If he had to grovel at the feet of every elite, let them damage his long gone sense of dignity, then it might be worth it for once. Your death would be the last piece of pressure on the dam before it burst open, he needed you to survive. If you won he could be with you. There wouldn't be any hiding because as a victor, Snow would already be finding ways to dig his talons into you. It was all worth it to be able to hold you again.
Finnick could watch every mechanical gear shift in your brain and fall into place. The way Conway loved you, which made Finnick seethe even if he'd always laughed it off like it didn't bother him in the slightest, was going to have to save your life. You'd hate yourself for it, but you'd hate yourself more if you didn't do everything you could do to be there for your family. The same family that you were convinced despised you, but you would spend every cent of victory money on doctors for your mother, or to make it so none of them had to worry about crabs ever again. Not as if that would be necessary, the influx of riches was so exorbitant no one really knew what to do with it once they'd helped those they loved and spoiled themselves sick. Regardless, if you had to step on Conway's head for them you would. Even if it meant the end of the friendship that had kept you afloat for years. Maybe you avoided home like the plague, but only after you'd worked to convince everyone you could sell out your booth. Finnick had always been in awe about how sweet little you could effortlessly piggyback on any information you had to make a sale, which was a largely successful method. If you won you'd have to focus your efforts on performing for all of Panem instead, but that wouldn't be an issue for you when your family would be safe.
Surely it didn't hurt that he was also on the other side of survival, maybe that was selfish for him to think about, but he hoped you knew he would take you back in a heartbeat. That every dream he'd ever shared with you, fantasy about your future, could be possible once you had that crown on your head. It would be full of trials and turbulent waters, but at least you could be together. So he watched as you forced your eyes to portray the gaze of a lover about to be ripped apart from her happy ending, the look you'd genuinely worn when he'd broken your heart. Conway seemed to know you well enough to understand that, but it gave Finnick pride to know he couldn't read you like a book, unlike him. At the end of the day that would be a good thing, at least Conway could die without his dreams of being loved by you being dismantled.
𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒
Finnick should've known better than to fall asleep once you had. But it felt so normal to have you asleep on his chest. He was no stranger to nightmares, his or your own, it had become a constant present in your lives. Usually he knew how to handle them, but now it was a completely different ballgame. When you woke up screaming you didn't want his comfort, you wanted him as far away as humanly possible. Hitting his chest as he unwrapped his arms as quickly as he could to dart out of the room as fast as he could while the doctors flooded in.
“Just let him kill me." You were sobbing, curled back into the ball where your knees were pulled to your chest as you cried into them. A doctor tried to touch you and you instantly pulled away, like you were a wounded dog. Your hand covered your ears as you rocked back forth, and back and forth. “I need to see Conway." You muttered and then so lightly under your breath, “Conway, Conway, Conway."
“Angel, he's not here right now." He'd never be here, but further upset could be avoided.
You nodded slowly, “I need to see Peeta." At least that was doable.
“Tomorrow, he's been doing better, we can take you to see Peeta tomorrow." A doctor assured, no one wanted to sedate you again unless they absolutely had to, so this was much better.
“Promise?"
“We'll do what we can." She smiled at you sympathetically.
You slowly uncurled yourself from your ball, “Okay."
“Are you feeling better?"
“Yeah, I'm sorry." Thank god, no king crisis. Just a moment that had now passed.
“You're okay, just had a bad dream. Perfectly understandable, do you need anything?" You shook your head and the medical staff slowly began filing out.
“Can I stay?" Finnick's fingers found the rope to focus on. You looked at him for a second, like you were deep in thought, before nodding. So he took his place in the chair, “Do you wanna talk about it?"
“You should just kill me now." The words ran out of your mouth and made his heart drop, “I know you want to and I wanted you too. I probably deserve the uncertainty of when it will happen, but I'm selfish and just need it to be over with."
He wasn't sure if his heart had ever hurt more, but it was always reaching new levels of pain. “I don't want to kill you and I'm not going to ever.”
"You should. Even I know I should die, it's not wrong to admit.” You blankly stared at the glass in front of you.
“You don't deserve to die, you've done nothing with that. You've suffered enough to make up for whatever it is you think you did.”
"No I haven't, this is the universe’s lead up to it. I hurt him, the only person who really cared about me since we were children, and I tore him into shreds. It has to come for me.”
“Look at me.” You kept staring at the glass. Finnick's words came out harsher than he expected them too, but maybe it would mean they finally got through your head. “Look at me!” Finally you did, looking so startled and confused. "This karmic retribution fantasy needs to stop. It's been six years. I'm not telling you to stop hurting or that the guilt will go away, but it doesn't mean you need to continue to suffer or deserve death.” He leaned forward in his chair, "You used Conway, so you deserve death? You spent six years being used by any Capitol elite willing to pay. Being horrifically abused in any way imaginable. You got sent back into the arena! There was only one year you had a victor and she came out of the arena known for being ‘crazy.’ They sent you back into the arena to die and you didn't expect to come out of it. The Capitol held you hostage and tortured you. Have you not given enough to make up for what you did as a teenager? Conway, after six years, would have said it was more than enough to make up for a few weeks of deception. Even if this led to his death, because no matter what, he cared about you. He was angry then, but I doubt that in whatever happens after we die he's holding that grudge after watching you suffer for so long because he loved you. You don't want someone you love to go through something like that.”
You were sobbing again and Finnick felt his own eyes brimming with tears. “I miss him."
“I know, angel. I know." He would never be able to fill the role that Conway had and he'd long accepted that. All he could do was assure you that when I came down to the bare bones of it all, Conway as he was, wouldn't have wanted you to suffer as much as you had for it. Whatever punishment it caused had been more than paid and he would've known that. He would've told you that if he could. He'd been so angry in the moment, but Finnick knew Conway still would have loved you despite the transgressions in his heart and life because that had been his way. All Finnick could do was hope you didn't find a way to see what Conway would really say, in the near future, because then he'd follow quickly behind.
𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒
thank you for reading, sorry this took so long, I've been very busy!! feedback, comment, likes, reblogs are all very appreciated. my ask box is always open and I loved answering them, requests are open and I've got some fics from them coming up after this. thank y'all so much for reading 💋
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gabessquishytum · 4 months
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Dream is ambivalent about A/B/O genders. He's seen enough shit in the universe in billion years, current human civilization doesn't even come close to his definition of 'strange.' Still, he tried on various genders like clothes (he feels most comfortable being an omega), and even hoped in secret that Calliope would be amenable to mating when they got married. He breached the subject very tentatively, found out she was not delighted by the prospect of being tied to an Endless at all, and they never touched upon it again. Their marriage crashed and burned soon anyway, so it must have been for the best. After their reunion with Hob post-fishbowl, Dream decides to take him up on his offer to meet more frequently and drops by. The timing is unfortunate (or fortunate, depends on the point of view!) as his human alpha friend turns out to be in the middle of his rut. And maybe Dream is not versed in human communication and rites, but even he understands that it's better to leave and return next week. Which he is about to do before Hob very enthusiastically jumps his bones. Dream is extremely confused and tries to talk Hob out of this endeavor - he believes Hob is not interested in him like THAT, but Hob is as single-minded as only an alpha in a rut can be and showers Dream with all the words of passion and praise his fevered brain can come with. When he drops the l-word, Dream melts and gives in. They spend Hob's rut together, and Dream is on cloud nine: he feels cherished, desired, and, above all, LOVED. So when Hob suddenly bites him, Dream is not opposed at all. Alright, it'd have been better etiquette if they had discussed it beforehand, but Dream currently is more occupied being happy because 1) his love is requited; 2) Hob wants him as his mate! The problem is, Hob'd have never dared to jump his Stranger like that, let alone do anything to him. He hoped that if he's lucky, maybe he can try to court him…in 500 years or so. To him, all that occurred was just a feverish rut dream. So when Hob comes to his senses once his rut is over, he finds a very fucked out Dream looking at him with heart eyes in his bed, sees a fresh mating bite on his neck…and panics. Dream immediately comes to the conclusion that Hob already regrets their mating and dissolves into sand, retreating to the Dreaming before he starts crying in the presence of this human - his mate - that humiliated him so. Chaos ensues!
Oh dear. These idiots! They're both as bad as each other, really.
Hob is just horrified that he'd done that to his stranger - to Dream! It's totally taboo to bite someone without even talking about it, and they certainly didn't do that. Hob doesn't even know if Dream wanted it! Wait - what if he started crying and disappeared because he didn't want it!? Hob ends up running to the bathroom and throwing up at the mere idea. How could he do such a heinous thing to the man he loves?!
Meanwhile Dream is flooding the dreaming with his tears (yes, literally) because he thinks that his mate regrets everything and probably hates him. How can he face Hob ever again? He'll have to, because they're mated... if Dream goes into heat, he'll need Hob. Being without him simply won't be an option.
Desire, Despair and Death are all sitting in the threshold and collectively groaning because the idiots are idioting. And Matthew has had enough of trying not to drown in the dreaming, so he makes an executive raven decision and heads to the waking world.
He immediately confronts Hob (who is still panick stricken and white as a sheet) about why he rejected the boss?? And Hob just gapes at him like "rejected??? i thought i assaulted him!!!" Matthew face-palms. Face-wings. Whatever. He tells Hob to go the fuck to sleep and fix things.
Easier said than done. But Hob eventually gets to the dreaming, swims through the tears, and finds his poor miserable mate curled up on his throne. Dream doesn't look up at all until Hob nuzzles his mating bite. The flood recedes a little bit. And Hob tries to explain as tenderly as he can, why he freaked out when he woke up.
Dream falls even more in love with him, honestly.
And three weeks later, they spend Dream’s first heat with a mate together in Hob’s bed. It's everything he's ever wanted. And Dream gets to bite Hob, giving his alpha a perfect mating bite to match his own.
And yes, Matthew gets so many raven treats as a reward for his service to his King.
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tartigglez · 8 months
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hi congrats!!!! could i request megumi +orange!!!
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"warmth"
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・❥・megumi x gn!reader
・❥・0.7k
・❥・back on my emo megumi agenda, first dates, silly kisses, fluff nothing important, no real plot, reader is a dog person
・❥・GOD I HAVEN'T BEEN ON HERE IN SO LONG THIS IS A VERY SMOL MEAL IM SO SORRY FOR MY TARDINESS ANON!!
・❥・if you want to request a prompt from this event, click on the orange title!
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it’s hard to find home when the only place you are ever truly comfortable is in the shadows. 
megumi has known this since he was a mere child, ever since the manifestation of his cursed technique he has known that that is where he belongs.
but he was wrong, he realised this after he met you, when you coaxed him out of the shadows, when slowly but surely, he was less haunted by the destiny of sorcery laid out before him. 
on your first date with megumi, he was really quite stoic, and seemed quite unbothered by your presence altogether. this was odd, considering he was the one who had asked you out in the first place. well, sort of…
“we should get dinner later” he had grumbled, not phrasing it in such a way one would ask a person they had a crush on if they’d like to enjoy a meal together at all. 
“sure!” you’d optimistically agreed (although you were internally questioning him), and that was that. 
when this dinner actually happened, megumi was rather awkward. he either wouldn't talk at all, or ask how your food was before turning almost as red as the crimson tablecloth laid out in front of you both. it was the sort of date that was hard to tell if it was really even a date at all. you wondered if he had just asked you to a meal as friends, but quickly realised that couldn’t be right, since any time you’d eaten out with him and another one of your classmates right after a mission, he’d be much more relaxed. 
in all reality, you didn’t know much about megumi. when in public, it was a little hard to discuss curses, so that was off the table despite being just about the only thing you had in common with him, because, of course, it's also rather difficult to talk about much other than curses inside the confines of jujutsu tech. 
eventually though, your awkward silence gave way to a common love that you both have, dogs! of course this was indirectly related to his shikigami, but the other people in the restaurant didn't need to know that. 
the date seemed to pass quickly after that, with megumi discussing the personalities of his “pet” dogs whilst wearing a slight smile. 
after insisting on buying your dinner for you, he quietly walked you to the outside of the restaurant, standing for a moment, trying to think of something to say. you however, had a trick up your sleeve. 
a kiss.
you placed a hand on his shoulder, leaning up on your tiptoes and giving him a quick peck on the cheek, before running to the nearest cab. 
“see you on monday, megumi! thanks for dinner!” 
however, he was still frozen, and only managed to speak a quiet “bye” as your taxi drove off. 
and in that moment, megumi fushiguro did something rather rare, and smiled a genuine smile. 
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“gumi, have you seen my hoodie?”
“your hoodie? is that what we’re calling it now?” he teases, practically smiling through his words. 
“shut up~ you know it’s my favourite”
“only cause it’s mine” he mumbles, gesturing you to come closer to him as he sits on his bed, beckoning you to cease your search. 
“fine, maybe that's why…” you trail off, coming over to the bed and taking a seat on his lap. 
he looks up at you with those eyes. so loving and pure and calm and nothing else matters when he looks at you like that. in conclusion, he wants attention. 
“what's wrong honey?” you ask, running a hand through the hair at the back of his neck, meeting his eyes with yours, tilting your head a little.
“nothin’, just thinking” he whispers.
“about what?”
“that's for me to know.”
and he does know. he’s thinking about how it’s been three years exactly since he took you out to that shitty restaurant, or how you came to his dorm at 2am two weeks later and said nothing, just pulled him in by the collar of his pyjamas and kissed him. how you never cease to surprise him. how bright his love for you burns. how that warmth can never truly be extinguished. 
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sfw masterlist || event masterlist
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© tartigglez, 2023. do not copy, translate or repost, reblogs appreciated
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Hotch x reader - as slow as you need
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heyyaa, could you maybe do a Hotch x reader where reader flinches?? how you wanna fill it in is completely up to you!! - Anon💜
TW: mentions of abusive ex
When Aaron began dating you, you hadn’t told him much about your past relationships, all you told him was that they didn’t last too long aside from one.
That’s all you told him.
You didn’t think you would have to tell him anymore than that until tonight.
Today had been a bad day for you, a really bad day, you were on edge constantly and you were trying to hide it, and so far you were doing well.
That was until you dropped a bowl in the kitchen when you and Aaron were making dinner and you stared down at the floor in horror.
“Are you okay?” Aaron asked.
You looked up at him with wide eyes.
“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry I’ll pick it up!”
Quickly you crouched down and began to gather the bits of the broken bowl.
Hotch took a moment to process what you had said.
“Hey you don’t have to apologise it was an accident, come in I’ll get the broom.”
You shook your head at him, shaky hands picking up the pieces.
“Hey, hey, you’re going to hurt yourself stop.”
Aaron reached out to stop you, and the violent flinch of your hands and head came.
Slowly he pulled his hands back and you froze in place again.
You were breathing heavily, your finger was bleeding slightly.
Aaron knew immediately what was going on, as a profiler he was ashamed he hadn’t noticed this before.
But he knew straight away what was going on, and he had a good hunch on what the reason behind this was.
“I’m not going to hurt you…” he whispered.
You slowly stood up and binned the broken bowl, and you looked at him.
“I just… I need some time..”
With that you rushed away and he gave you the space you needed, he finished cooking and put it all in the oven, he cleaned the dishes and put some laundry on.
It had been just over an hour and he walked over to the bedroom door and knocked.
“Can I come in sweetheart?” He asked softly.
“Yeah…”
He opened the door and stayed by the doorframe.
You were sat on the side of the bed, staring at the floor.
“I’m sorry…”
“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.” He said gently.
You looked up at him and he gestured to the bed and you nodded.
Aaron walked over, sitting near you but not next to you to give you some space and he rested a hand on his knee.
“I want you to know I would never hurt you okay? Never.”
“I know.. I know.. it’s just..”
You sighed.
“I guess I probably should’ve told before we started dating…” you mumbled.
Aaron waited patiently waited for you to carry on talking, not wanting to jump to any conclusions.
“My uh.. my ex didn’t take to well to me dropping things.. he um..”
“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.”
“He used to hit me..”
Aaron nodded his head a little, taking a small breath.
“And I know you wouldn’t…”
“You can’t shake the fear though.”
You nodded a little.
“As long as you know I’d never hurt you that’s okay. I’ll give you all the space you need, and do whatever you need me to do when you feel like this okay?”
You nodded your head and wiped the backs of your hands along your eyes to clear your tears.
“Thank you Aaron..”
He smiled and you both sat there for a few moments before you stood up and held your arms out.
Aaron smiled, standing up he did the same and you walked over, gently hugging and he softly hugged you back
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originalaccountname · 7 months
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In your Murase Lives ADA!Chuuya AU, Dazai still joins the ADA eventually right? After he loses both Ango and Oda (like how Chuuya left when he only had Dazai left, but Dazai seemed to be better with his new friends).
How do they react to that? Does Chuuya help Dazai join? Do they acknowledge that they knew each other before (well, I feel everyone could tell)? Is Chuuya happy he left? Or is he mixed about them working together again? Is Dazai feeling mixed up because Chuuya left him (but now after Odasaku he understands it better)?
I was trying to think of this had been mentioned in your comics on them but I didn’t think it’d been mentioned except in the intervening years Dazai had to deal with Mori’s complaining about Chuuya’s defection.
I talked about it a little bit in this post:
If Oda dies the same way… it’s a fun question. Dazai would leave, Dazai would still refuse to work for the government, so his options are limited. I can’t imagine Chuuya leaving at 16, join the ADA, and the mafia not knowing a thing about it? So what would Dazai do? Chuuya left and joined a group and now that group is his only option in Yokohama. If he wants to join them, he’ll still have to wait two years for his records to be erased and hidden. And he knows Chuuya is gonna be there, and he knows him!! How frustrating and stressful is that wait going to be? I’d like Chuuya to be gone when Dazai first joins, so Entrance Exam can still take place in a similar way. Maybe he accompanied Ranpo on his contract out of town? I do wonder if he’d confront Dazai publicly or in private… I’m still not sure how much he told the ADA about his own origins.
To expand on that, Entrance Exam the novel is quite different from the anime. Ranpo is on an investigation in Kyushu until the finale of Kunikida and Dazai's investigation to find and stop the Azure Messenger/Apostle. Ranpo shows up in person in time to deduce where the bomb was located (and Dazai tests his "ability" by pinching his hair at this moment). It's a key moment for Dazai because it's the moment he decides the ADA is the real deal and they just might be what he's looking for (this exam went both ways).
oh no this is gonna be long and turn into an improvised analysis of Entrance Exam
So, that's the thing: Dazai was very much testing the ADA for the entirety of his entrance exam. He was figuring out clues and coming to conclusions much faster than Kunikida was, but he wouldn't tell him outright: he was artfully slipping half-clues into his conversations with Kunikida to see if he would pick up on them. And he did! Which made him a good potential partner! Because Dazai didn't expect the ADA to be on his level, but wanted them to be able to work with him. And then there was Ranpo who very much was on his level and Dazai fanboy'd about it.
so. my AU.
It's funny, since Dazai joins at 20, and Chuuya left at 16 (almost 17), that they still get their 4-year gap. Except! this time the roles are reversed and Chuuya wasn't quite concerned about hiding (that's a whole other subject). I can't imagine Dazai watching Chuuya "betray" (leave) the PM on his own without consequences only to join some do-gooders not too long after and not get curious. Wanting to study him under a microscope and all.
So Dazai would have some knowledge from observing the ADA and Chuuya from a distance. Basic stuff like what they do and roughly who works there. I would expect canon Dazai to have had similar knowledge before his entrance exam, but who knows.
There was probably something reassuring in Chuuya seemingly having found a place in the light after everything he went through. But it would also a good excuse for comparison and self-depreciation. Fortunately, Dazai is motivated by Oda's words and a never-ending need to one-up Chuuya. Imagine the embarrassment if he gave up on his best chance of helping people because he was afraid of facing Chuuya.
Now, Let's say Chuuya was accompanying Ranpo on that investigation out of town. When they get back, it's to a crisis, and a Dazai who has been there for a while.
Ranpo was the one to figure out Chuuya's past in this AU, he knows about his (short) time in the mafia, but Dazai and his ability were a well-kept secret of the PM. Chuuya wouldn't spoil that: he didn't leave out of hatred for the mafia, he left out of grief and because he had that opportunity. It would probably take Ranpo 3 seconds to connect the missing dots once Dazai is revealed: singularity -> can't stop it -> has been used 3 times -> still alive -> something to stop him -> nullification -> Dazai.
Everything hinges on Ranpo and what he knows of this new recruit before meeting him: Fukuzawa and Kunikida are suspicious of Dazai being sent to infiltrate them, Fukuzawa is willing to kill Dazai over these suspicions, Chuuya would recognize Dazai instantly and also get suspicious and, depending on his reaction, seal his fate.
FORTUNATELY we know Fukuzawa talked to Ranpo beforehand and canonically Ranpo took one good look at Dazai and decided he was fine. So I say Ranpo kept Chuuya distracted for the rest of that day. Kunikida still fake-shot Dazai, they still got the airplane back up (hush about Chuuya who could have caught it), Dazai still made an excellent impression on Kunikida, and everything went as smoothly.
Which would bring their confrontation to afterwards. The big finale with Sasaki happens a few days later, but Dazai vanishes during that time, presumably to investigate and corner her. That does leave us with the perfect opportunity for Dazai and Chuuya to cross paths (Chuuya would have heard Dazai's name at some point) and confront each other. I did mention Chuuya had a bit of a dark justice/vigilantism phase during his time with Murase before the ADA, and Dazai's objective at that moment is to bring an end to Sasaki by his own means, as the justice system would never be able to reach her, so... 🤝
Another fun thing about Entrance Exam is that Kunikida is always just on the verge of figuring out what Dazai's deal is, but Dazai keeps being stupid and annoying exactly during those moments, so Kunikida throws his doubts out the window along with Dazai every time.
In short, Ranpo would know Dazai and Chuuya used to know each other, skk would have their confrontation in private and shake hands over doing what the system can't handle, and Fukuzawa and Yosano might be able to connect the dots themselves after a while of watching them, but keep it silent.
Our beloved Kunikida came in too late to know Chuuya's backstory and had a similar instant annoyance and teamwork chemistry with Dazai that Chuuya seems to be also experiencing, so to him this is just Dazai weirdness. Any subsequent addition to the ADA would have no reason to question them.
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vaxieth · 9 months
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because something really did ask, have a much too long post about my thoughts on laudna’s individual dynamics with the rest of bells hells.
under the cut because it’s almost 3000 words.
laudna/imogen
i struggle to find something to say about imogen and laudna that hasn’t already been said a million times before. the core concept—the thesis—of their arcs, together and separately, is choice. so much of their backstories are defined by helplessness. laudna was chosen and killed because she happened to look like someone else, she was resurrected because she happened to be there. imogen’s mother left, she was burdened with powers she didn’t understand and meant constant pain and isolation. so, they make sure to constantly emphasize that the other person has a choice in everything. imogen tells laudna she only has to come back if she wants to, even though it would have devastated her to lose laudna forever. laudna tells imogen that the gods can’t control her, that no matter what her “destiny” is, if she wants, they can leave and live in a little cottage and raise horses together. the way they love each other unconditionally is all the more incredible given how cruel the world was to them for so long. laudna’s “you make me better” is true for both of them. they give each other a place to be vulnerable and feel all their messiest, worst feelings because they know the other one won’t judge them. they’ll support each other no matter the choices they make.
something i’ve mentioned quite a few times but never gone in depth about is that imogen and laudna do have a fairly significant age difference, and i do think that affects their dynamic. on the one hand, they both have a bit of arrested development—imogen due to her isolation from the rest of gelvaan from 18-26, laudna because she died at 20. on the other, laudna has so much more life experience than imogen. she spent almost 30 years traveling and interacting with the world even if was mostly people trying to kill her, maybe even because of that. the “laudna is imogen’s aunt/mother/older sister” takes were obviously ridiculous, but laudna does canonically look at imogen and see someone young who she wants to protect in a way she never was. she said as much to fcg after the gnarlrock fight. laudna acts as imogen’s rock, her tether if you will, a lot of the time, and part of the reason she can counterbalance imogen’s anxiety is because of the experience that comes with age. for example, during their conversation in episode 49, laudna is able to stay more “rational” and level-headed even when imogen is scared and overwhelmed. 
one of my other favorite things about them, specifically from laudna’s point of view, is that with a few exceptions (the gnarlrock fight, her jealousy of frida), she doesn’t seem insecure about their relationship. again, during episode 49, laudna mentions that she knows they haven’t talked in a while, but she didn’t worry because they “transcend words.” she didn’t need outside assurance from imogen because she felt confident in their love for each other. something i love about that episode 39-49 period is that they didn’t interact a lot, but when they did, they slipped right about in the same kind of intimacy they’d always had—imogen holding launda’s hand when they went into her dream together, laudna’s protectiveness of imogen after she interacted with ludinus. but anyway—that confidence is why i believe the transition from friends to lovers was so easy for laudna. laudna’s unsure of herself, of delilah and what she might do, but she’s absolutely not unsure of the love between her and imogen. that’s why as soon as imogen tells her she’s not a bad person, that she wants to be with laudna in that way, she lets herself embrace it entirely.
in conclusion: they invented romance, they’re the best canon pairing critical role has ever had and one of the best dynamics in general, etc., etc.
laudna/orym
oh my god, WHERE to begin? i feel like my take on their dynamic is slightly controversial. at the very least, i get more push back from people when i post about it than anything else, so let me start with this: orym cares deeply about laudna, i will never dispute that. however, orym is uncomfortable with laudna and has been since the very beginning of the campaign. she’s his friend and he recognizes her beautiful heart and resilient spirit, but he’s uncomfortable with her appearance and her messages in his head, with her macabre humor and her deadness. he can’t reconcile that laudna his friend and laudna the dead woman can’t be separated. laudna’s deadness is a part of her, one laudna embraces. orym, for better or worse, is “normal.” he grew up with a loving family and he had a husband and a career. will and derrig’s deaths were an unbelievable tragedy but one that never challenged his place within the status quo. (sidenote: i’ve always wondered if part of orym’s discomfort with laudna come from the fact that her proximity to death is a reminder of the resurrections will and derrig never got.) he sees himself as a follower, someone that doesn’t stand out, then there’s laudna, who does nothing but stand out. 
something i find fascinating is that orym is the first person to find out laudna’s backstory, and it affects him so much he can’t sleep that night and takes a point of exhaustion. he even explicitly recognizes the dehumanization she’s gone through and how laudna’s relationship with puppets like pate and sashimi mirror that. yet, he still never apologizes for trying to disguise her appearance, something without even asking. yes, i get it’s tactical and for “safety” (though that argument falls a bit flat for me when there’s also a glowing rock person and a fully conscious automaton in the group, but whatever), but it still hurts laudna. even beyond that, orym always qualifies his friendship with laudna to other person, making some mention of how she’s dead-looking and isn’t that crazy, wow, almost as if he wants some validation that it—laudna—is weird (one he, interestingly, rarely ever gets, given how enraptured most of the other pcs, including guests, and even some npcs, are with her). he does this even in situations he absolutely doesn’t need to like, for example, when maeve says laudna “looks cooler than i thought.” all this just sucks. it’s not that the love isn’t there, it is. it just isn’t unconditional, and laudna deserves better than that.
finally: the delilah in the room. no, it isn’t orym’s “fault” delilah is back. yes, he was also having an extremely bad time during the bor’dor fight and it wasn’t his “responsibility” to save laudna from herself, but laudna is orym’s friend. he listened to laudna tell him the trauma delilah put her through, he fought through hell to save laudna from her, and still nodded because part of him thought maybe delilah could help him and that was selfish. the fight against ludinus is important to of the bells, but for orym, it’s personal. it’s been his mission for six years. meanwhile, laudna is the one with the least enthusiasm about this. she has no connection to the gods. in fact, she actively thinks they dislike her, but he’s willing to sacrifice not just his safety, but the safety of her and all his friends for a cause they never set out to fight for.
in conclusion: i want to put them in a salad mixer together and watch them go around and around and around and around and around, then let them out to scream at each other a little.
laudna/ashton
if i had to explain laudna and ashton’s dynamic in one word, it would be “projection.” i adore their relationship, it’s one of my top 5 c3 dynamics, but oh my god, so much projection, and it’s so interesting because of that. ashton thinks he understands laudna, but in reality, he doesn’t at all. i’m an absolute sucker for characters that look very different on the surface but in reality are much more similar than they know, and ashton and laudna are that to a tee. they are very much narrative parallels especially regarding their feelings of “brokenness” and how their traumas are physical, visual parts of themselves, but the ways they diverge are almost more interesting.
certain people have said that her conversations with ashton are the only time laudna is “honest” or that, at the very least, she’s more honest with him than she is with anyone else, and i couldn’t disagree more. laudna can be a joyful, optimistic person and deeply traumatized with a core anger she hasn’t truly processed. laudna is a high-charisma character, and in my opinion, part of how that manifests is her ability to adapt her demeanor to the person she’s talking to. she speaks gently to imogen the same way she matches chetney’s hyperactive energy when they go sky-sailing. of course when she’s with ashton, who makes no effort to hide his anger and bitterness and doesn’t want her to be soft, she isn’t. none of these laudnas are more “real” than the others, they’re all laudna. what those people, and ironically, ashton themself, don’t get, or won’t let himself get, is that all those things can be true at once.
with ashton specifically, i don’t think they want to believe that because then they’d have to admit that growth and healing is a real possibility because anger is so much easier to deal with. people talk most about orym’s choices during the bor’dor fight most, but i’m fascinated by ashton’s as well. i wouldn’t be surprised if there was a part, no matter how small, that wanted laudna to break, to prove to himself that he was right and laudna was just as broken and fucked-up as them. so, laudna killing bor’dor was almost vindication, evidenced by their “what have i done?” “nothing i haven’t done.” exchange afterwards.
i don’t want this to sound like ashton doesn’t care about launda, they do. ashton cares about her so much, and besides imogen and fearne, is the most unabashedly into laudna’s aesthetic. i love how much they love all the weird shit she does. i love how protective ashton is of laudna, especially during battles and their willingness to go above and beyond for her—he carried laudna when she was dead despite his chronic pain without complaining once and were willing to make a deal with hexum after going through an entire museum heist to repay their debt. i love the moments when ashton sees how much laudna is struggling and tells her, as gently as he can, to take a moment and do what she can to ground herself. i love that when laudna way too dramatically assumes they kidnapped imogen, their response is “that’s very fair.” it’s all wonderful, and i love them.
in conclusion: I LOVE THEM SO MUCH AND I WANT TO LOCK THEM IN A ROOM AND FORCE THEM TO TALK ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS FOR HOURS.
laudna/fcg
laudna and fcg have been getting more attention in the past few days for obvious reasons and that has me rubbing my hands together maniacally because even though they have very little actual interaction, the subtext is delicious. 
besides ashton, fcg might be the character laudna parallels the most, especially their struggle with their humanity (if they’re even human at all), which isn’t helped by the constant dehumanization they face from outsiders, including the almost continuous comments they get when they meet someone new. people look at launda and see a horror while they look at fcg and see a novelty (he’s a robot with personality??), and those both suck. i think, for fcg, laudna is an uncomfortable reflection of himself because everything they’re afraid is true about themself is true about laudna. finding out they had a soul was such an important moment for his character (also remember his early campaign habit of calling other people “soul-touched folks”). as a hollow one, who knows if laudna even has a soul. if i’m honest, fcg seems to think less of laudna than the rest of the party (see: him calling her a “former person,” his speech before casting turn undead including, “no offense to laudna but can you please shine your light and wipe these evil, dead souls off the face of this flat planet?”) and that’s probably why. they have such strict ideas about “good,” which has become “godly,” and “wrong,” (“ungodly”), and within that framework, everything seemed to point to laudna as “ungodly,” which is why their empathy towards her is lacking. 
the biggest conflict between fcg and laudna right now is obviously their feelings on the gods. the changebringer brought fcg purpose and tangibly helps them on a daily basis. of course they want to share this incredible thing with everyone they meet, especially his friends. yet, time-and-time again, the world has shown laudna the gods don’t seem to care about her. before someone says anything, pike resurrecting laudna doesn’t automatically mean she has to trust the gods. clerics and paladins spent 30 years running her out of towns for existing and trying to kill her in the name of their gods. if the circumstances were different, there’s a good chance fcg could have been one of those people. for fcg, the world is black-and-white. for laudna, it’s all gray. laudna was able to have a conversation with imogen about the ruby vanguard’s message and the purpose of the gods because she understands the need to question things and thinks that’s a good thing even if she doesn’t agree with the conclusions. fcg’s not there yet, and until he is, their friendship with laudna will never be able to progress past where it is now.
in conclusion: please have a conversation, maybe even two or three. it’d be so good for fcg to learn the world’s incredible nuances and for laudna to see how faith in the gods can be an empowering force for good, not just something beyond her grasp.
laudna/fearne
out of all launda’s dynamics, this is the one i desperately want more of. we’ve gotten so little! almost all their moments are interactions between the three witches that tend to center imogen (making the red-string friendship bracelets and comforting imogen after she talked with relvin come to mind) OR center imogen and fearne’s mutual appreciation for laudna’s… everything. one of my favorite about fearne is that, like imogen, she doesn’t think laudna is gross and creepy, she thinks laudna is gorgeous and charming without any caveats. even ashton, who also loves laudna’s laudnaness, tends more towards “yeah, you’re disgusting and THAT’S why it’s great.”
the other main part of their dynamic i want to sink my teeth into is the coin-toss, more specifically fearne’s guilt over the coin toss. regardless of whether you think fearne lied (i personally find that headcanon FASCINATING but to each their own), she clearly feels so many emotions about having to pick whether to save laudna and orym that she hasn’t even begun to unpack. one of the few sole moments we’ve gotten of them was in episode 42 when laudna asked fearne to help teach her to cast fireball, and in it, fearne, unprompted, blurts out, “how’s it feel being alive again?” almost immediately. she also apologizes to laudna, says they’ll fight any piece of delilah that’s still in there, and tells her, “i missed you terribly for that moment in time.” even when laudna gives her the chance to make the conversation light-hearted, fearne stays so genuine, which is all the more-noteworthy because she’s usually so flippant and almost always keeps her real feelings close to her chest. 
some other examples of fearne’s guilt include: the 4sd where ashley said part of why she was so protective over imogen during their separation arc was that she couldn’t bear having to tell laudna anything happened to her and just this past episode when fearne’s protectiveness after laudna made her only cast first-level cure wounds on fcg after they cast turn undead.
in conclusion: PLEASE LET THEM INTERACT MORE. THERE’S SO MUCH JUICY POTENTIAL AND I WANT TO SEE IT EXPLORED.
laudna/chetney
i don’t have that much to say about them except that their dynamic is absolutely delightful. i love that we’ve gotten to see more of it in recent episodes, and i hope that continues. 
chetney exists at an interesting place between orym’s genuine discomfort and fearne and imogen’s complete enchantment with laudna’s undeadness. he is sometimes grossed out, but he also seems to accept it as a thing about laudna without too much judgment, or at least, that “judgment” is light-hearted in a way orym’s or even fcg’s isn’t.
i love that they’re the characters with the most life experience (even if laudna is technically the fourth oldest, fcg only has two years of memory and fearne is a 100+ but spent 99% of that time in one place) but also embrace being “childish” and silly together, like the entire sky-sail sequence! 
in conclusion: *gently holds* i just think they’re neat!
that’s all! if you read this whole thing, you get my eternal love and gratitude. thank you.
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