#they will create the same complex understandings of gender and sexuality that exist in the world within their work

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

[they-them-that]

The Complex Misogyny Enacted by Queer Men

Call outs: James Somerton, Trixie Mattel, Katya, Le'Ron Readus, The Roundtable, Rupaul, Karl Lagerfeld, Dolce and Gabana

With the James Somerton scandal, although I only watched some of his videos in passing, it has definitely made me make sure to be more vigilant about the content I consume and how they source.

I also want to address James' misogyny, something that tragically isn't unique to him. The "straight girl" scapegoat many queer men target has bothered me for a long time. They try to frame it in a way that is "punching up" at the privileged but their problem is entirely against them being women. Trixie Mattel has a habit of complaining about "straight" girls that has put me off, especially when her complaints are incredibly presumptuous and small minded. We wouldn't know random women's sexuality yet we choose to assume they're straight so we can openly ridicule them. Even if these women are straight, the problems queer men levy towards them doesn't so much call out any discriminatory behavior as it is shaming women for what they think is "shrill", "annoying", or just for sharing a space with them.

I recall an episode of UNHhhh where Trixie and Katya said how straight people are guests in queer spaces and in the same way, they can be "uninvited". Even though they use a gender neutral term here, we know that the bulk of straight people who attend queer events are women. In the same way that queer spaces are a safe space for gay men, it's also a safe space for women who want to avoid sexual advancements and sexual violence. Gay men overlook women's issues and needs when they find their presence inconvenient despite women posing little threat to them.

I've also seen the way queer men target queer women when they feel like they've been benefiting more than them. James Somerton, La'Ron Readus, and Tom from The Roundtable have all argued how the ratio of wlw representation in media compared to mlm is due to favouritism towards wlw relationships. This is a pure assumption, at the point they made this argument, we never heard of a canon mlm relationship being shot down by TV or movies and the accusers provided no examples of such, just that wlw representation has been making a breakthrough at the time thanks to the vehement pushing of its writers and show creators. It has nothing to do with preferences for wlw relationships as these studios have tried to stop it and still push back against it to "appeal to a broad audience". It just so happens that the queer creatives who have made waves for representation wanted to represent queer femmes, most identifying closely with sapphic experiences. To underestimate the amount of discrimination these queer creators got for getting wlw representation out there by assuming they have some type of privilege over queer CIS men is grossly ignorant. Although mlm representation is important, it's upsetting to see queer men look at wlw representation and respond with jealousy, unknowing of how queerness already centralizes them. RuPaul's Drag Race, for example, was only allowed for CIS men before trans women were recognized as legitimate drag performers, many of the "CIS" contestants turning out to be trans women. Drag kings still have not made any appearances on the show and are still overlooked and undervalued in the Drag community.

Even though queer men cry for their turn when it comes to something like queer representation in the media (even though it exists, they just have a problem with women having more than them), they don't bat an eye in the way queer men dominate places like the fashion industry that heavily discriminate against women (Karl Lagerfeld and Dolce and Gabana being infamously misogynistic). They also wince at gay shipping culture and mlm representation when it's created by women, accusing them of fetishism, something I've been guilty of in the past. Although, there's an understandable desire for mlm content that is also written by queer men and discomfort about women being voyeurs in gay fiction, we're also assuming these women aren't queer themselves or that they even identify as women. Love Simon's author, Becky Albertalli was forced to come out as bisexual after years of scrutiny for being a "straight woman profiting off of queer romance".

"I legitimately didn't realize. I'm thirty-seven years old. I've been happily married to a guy for almost ten years. I have two kids and a cat. I've never kissed a girl. I never even realized I wanted to. But if I rewind further, I'm pretty sure I've had crushes on boys and girls for most of my life. I just didn't realize the girl crushes were crushes."

There is an oversight on how many people divulge in queer fiction in order to explore their sexuality and gender long before they even consider that they could be queer themselves (I know that was my experience). But even with straight women, many of them are actually drawn to gay fiction because it subtracts women from the equation. Female characters are subject to sexist tropes and many of their romances are imbalanced and toxic. Gay fiction has been a way for women to enjoy romance without feeling the weight of patriarchy through femme-presenting characters.

All this to say that misogyny is still fervent in the queer community and queer men do not get a pass on how they talk about and treat women. I noticed that the most privileged of the queer community, that being White CIS gay men, are the ones who act the most entitled in the queer spaces they enter, not the "straight" women they constantly antagonize. Queer men still struggle with what all men struggle with and that's acknowledging their privileges. Even if they swear their problem with women is because of their sexuality, it really ends up coming down to their gender.

[enkephallic]

Queer Sexuality in Limbus Company

My not very coherent mini-thoughts.

Playing Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina, I had an impression that PM often wrote women who would end up entangled in the lives of several people and lead them down a twisted path (Carmen), use their strength to make a name for themselves for perceived good (Kali) or just Absolute Strength for what it is (Garion). In addition to this, the female characters in lead roles of the games would wittingly or unwittingly shift the narrative to bring havoc upon the male protagonist's reason to exist (Angela to Ayin, Angelica to Roland).

This can be seen in Limbus Company - Kromer ruins what was Sinclair's normalcy. Catherine pulls a Carmen. Ryoshu's relentless pursue of artistic anatomical destruction. However, a key difference between Limbus and the previous games is the incorporation of classical literature, and its figures into the narrative. This creates an interesting blend of PM-style characterization and gender/queerness in the source material.

Demian and Moby Dick are good examples of this. Both can be read from a queer lens - Demian can be interpreted in several ways, from a psychological journey of awakening to a story of understanding one's own identity (sexuality and gender is also encompassed in this). Most of the book focuses on Sinclair's internal self and his growth, with periods of both with and without Demian in his life.

The most notable difference is the lack of homoromantic tension present in the book. Book Sinclair is tormented with dreams of Kromer hurting him, until he dreams of being forced beneath Demian and feels 'ecstasy' while suffering gladly under him. His complex feelings towards Demian encompasses more than love, while simultaneously evoking queer themes to many readers. It is difficult to argue the same for Limbus Demian, who certainly leans more heavily into the symbolic mentor role and questionably human.

This could be due to Sinclair's journey being far from complete. The book gets rid of Kromer very early, and it's only the start of his growth as a person. Perhaps we'll see more of Demian and Sinclair's relationship unfold, though right now there isn't much of that happening.

On the other hand, Ishmael and Queequeg leans quite heavily into the book duo's closeness. So much so that Queequeg saving Tashtego in Moby Dick is adapted into an Ishmael-Queequeg interaction. Moby Dick features a close bond between them described with the words 'marriage', and goes on to feature them sharing a safety rope that would bind their fates together if one should fall. These aspects, prime for queer reading, are picked up on and detailed in Canto 5.

What's more, there are many narrative and characterization choices that could have been made to tell their story. In PM fashion, the genders are swapped and both Ishmael and Queequeg are women. All of the female Sinners are genderswapped versions of their counterparts, while the male sinners are as-is (not adapted female to male). The decision to adapt Queequeg into a woman along with Ishmael is a choice that allows the preservation of queer reading - they could have chosen to keep Queequeg male, but did not. Conversely, Kromer was swapped into a woman from her book counterpart. The reason why is unclear, but the gendered 'genderswapping' in PM has a lot of avenue to explore in.

In many ways, Limbus defies gacha traditions including gendered conventions employed in larger games (gendered attire, implied sexualization) which can be attributed to their indie-ness and nonconformity. The most notable one would probably be how they handle romance - many playable gacha characters do not hint at heterosexual relationships, while Heathcliff straight up has the most twisted love affair with Cathy. Some games with female fanbases create strong bonds between male characters, while keeping female characters catered to their male fanbase. The opposite can be seen in Limbus, where straight relations are hinted at the most (or outright established) while male-male friendships aren't very prominent within the Sinners. There's some resentment (Hong Lu and Heathcliff) and improvement (Sinclair and Heathcliff), but not really any One duo that stick out.

[protectingtulpas]

Okay so im an (now ex) anti-endo (i still feel uncomfortable around endos but i guess now that not valid) who discover that im an tulpa.

For more context im the host of a complex polyfrag DID system who always belive endos jist fake for attention and hurt the real system comunity (traumagenic systems) and im just "exist" since this year 2020 i got a blackout of 2 years until 2023 and what the rest of the system tell me when i ask was "you got a colapse and lock yourself in your room for two years and fall in dormancy, when you finally get out you was so confused that you split in the fragment youre now and Gaby and so you cannot remember what happen because of that and Miyamoto (an alter friend of mine) was the host for that time" i got not reason to doubt about it an they have no reason to lie, they say the same thing to all our friends and even to my girlfriend.

I was looking arround of some old papers and pdfs and i find out that they have a diary and it was pretty old and one page have my sigh but the date its supposed to be in the time i was locked and some other papers was the same or some alters mention me like if i was there like really there.

Then i finally discover a paper with the tittle "[My name] (oc lore)

And pretty detailed pages about the process of creation of a tulpa and a character itself and descriptions very accurated about my body and personality plus a background history that its exactly like my memorys and thing about my gender and sexuality also accurate (i get offended for that because i really struggle with that) and and alter called Axel/Alex who i know he exist because and romantic history of the system while i was out but i supposed he was just a fragment of another alter and i discover that he was one of the "original alters" (i mean the result of the first split) and he created me like A TULPA, he say in his notes that the rest of the system is traumagenic and he discover them in therapy but whatever it means we have traumagenic origins but as long as i know im THE ONLY TULPA/ENDOGENIC/WILLOWGENIC ALTER (HEADMATE???) And one of the few that are anti-endo (the big problem there is that were least than 5 and those alters are my friends (probably not anymore)

I really need help of a tulpa to understand this because i have so many cuestions about this and i dont have so many tulpa friends exactly and i guess i have to change my mindset and i was wonder i can have your help...

Oh wow, yeah this is a ton, thank you for reaching out for real! Sorry it took a hot sec to respond, I've been blocked from front a lot myself so I wanted to be in tune enough to give this the response it deserves.

Alrightie, so we have P-DID (we're mixed origin too), so we don't have as much dissociation as y'all, but we do have a bit of experience with host changes and people blacking out/going dormant for waay longer than expected, so that's where we're coming from here. Especially with memory barriers so high, host switches can be really disorienting and some pretty big things can be forgotten depending on the system. It sounds like during the time there was a big host switch, you got created by Axel/Alex, but due to u being affected by the inherent dissociative barriers of your system, you forgot your early memories of being created - as evidenced by things being signed by you and mentions of you that you don't remember, if I'm reading this correctly. That's a lot to take in, but it's good to have all this evidence you can bring up to your alters in a discussion about it if you're able. I know it's probably freaking you out, but just asking the alters that mention you/worked on you in the papers instead of accusing them will do a lot to help with resistance and all. I'm sure they had a good reason for not saying anything to you.

That brings me to my second point; if a good chunk of you are intensely anti-endo, there's a good chance your memories of your creation/origin are blocked behind dissociative barriers because that knowledge woulda been too much for your system to process and bare at the time. Make sure to consider that in what ya do- try not to dump all the pressure on yourself, if you put yourself into a spiral about all this or try to force your other alters to do a 180 it might end up counterproductive. You're their equal, don't ever forget that; take it slow and steady. Things'll end up alright. On the flipside of this, there's a reason you exist, and you were created because somebody (Axel/Alex?) WANTED you here, and that's important. You have just as much a right to be here, and it's not a bad thing that you exist or to challenge the collective opinion of how things work. That's what growing and changing is all about!!

You don't hafta jump full force into the endogenic community of course, take your time and don't overwhelm yourself. I think you'll enjoy a term we're extremely attached to: traumaendo systems are systems that experience both traumagenic and endogenic origins in one way or another, and the label is focused on the specific unique experiences we go through while straddling both worlds. Tulpamancy is particular is controversial because it started out as a separate community developing their own skills before coming into contact with the greater plural community, so you'll find that a lot of terms within it are different and stuff. Additionally, you'll probably run into a lotta controversies, specifically the infamous one about tulpamancy's etymological origin, so make sure to keep your head on your shoulders and put research and objectivity first. Don't forget that we've asked people actually of the culture about this, and that the etymological origin is of an open religion that encourages their meditations be shared and adapted. People will make up anything to try and keep us hated, but don't let it stop you. You're not hurting anyone by existing as u are.

And lastly? Take care of urself. There're a lot of little intricacies I can't predict because everything is different from system to system, but if you pay attention and work as a team with your alters, you'll start to see patterns and understand yourself more. You might find that you operate a bit differently than them, you might not, but regardless, there's no shame in your existence. If you have any more questions, go ahead and shoot me a DM privately- I'll see what I can do. Good luck out there, stay true to yourself

[burnt-coffeepot]

this year i changed my mind about bi/pan lesbians and gays.

after all, digging into the roots of the very word lesbian we find a woman (Sappho) who wrote love poems about women and men too.

after all, if we look at the history of our community, in the eye of the oppressor there has never been a difference between (open) bisexuals and homosexuals: we're all depraved to them, and we shouldn't be fooled to think that some of us would be respected, cuz it's not true.

after all, the very slurs used to define us, have always been used indiscriminately.

after all, the lines between sexualities are so blurred, and words are just trying to create boxes than don't exist, but serve the purpose to simplify existence; so we can explain it better.

sexuality is social, based on a lot more than just sex, and when you understand why it's dumb to exclude trans and non binary people from certain sexualities, you also understand how restrictive the concept of exclusive monosexuality is.

you can like only the same gender and genders similar to yours, but reality is so much more complex that we would do more bad than good to ourselves if we tried to police who can and cannot define themselves a certain way.

also, who am i to tell another queer person how to live their experience?

identity is a statement.

the enemy is not in our lines, the enemy is not another queer.

[officialpenisenvy]

What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

this is an extremely loaded question aimed at getting me to admit something about the role of biological sex in sexual attraction. but i will take you in good faith and try to answer your question (under the cut, since the horrid way you formatted this ask makes it long enough already) because i have some time to waste on this sunday morning.

firstly, i have never believed and never will believe sexuality to be an innate attraction or orientation: i don't think anyone is born heterosexual or homosexual, but i also don't believe everyone is born bisexual and gradually loses attraction to one gender over another. i don't see the point in doing sexuality metaphysics, i find it to be a pointless exercise in respectability at best and a means for systematic eradication at worst: if i say we're not born gay a homophobe can then say "stop being gay/pray the gay away", if i say we are born gay a homophobe can then say "let's find the gene that causes homosexuality and eradicate it". simply put, i don't think the question of why someone is homosexual (or bisexual or heterosexual, for that matter) is ever worth entertaining, because it does nothing to further the liberation of the gay people that exist here and now, and it only gives ammunition to those who want to stop the spread and existence of gay people altogether.

i believe sexuality to be socially constructed, much like gender and much like everything else in our lived reality: every single interaction we have in our lives with other people shapes us irrevocably, from our parents to our teachers and classmates to the rude cashier at the store to the creepy guy following us down the street to our potential sexual prospects, and the way all those elements interweave in the rich and ever-changing tapestry of our lives is ultimately what creates our personhood, included in which is our sexuality and our gender. we use labels to simplify and streamline and help communicate to others our complex sexual and romantic preferences, sacrificing some nuance in the process: if i say i am a lesbian it could mean anything from "i have never thought about men sexually a day in my life" to "i understand and even sometimes feel attraction to men but choose not to act on it because i only want to date women", but the ultimate message that comes across is the unavailability to men and availability to women, which is what is important to the lesbian-identifying speaker (the same goes for gay men, bisexuals and heterosexuals, but i can obviously give more accurate examples as far as the lesbian experience is concerned).

you mention the animal kingdom, which is interesting: sexual behaviour of males on males and females on females is common or at least observed in many animal species, but this is not homosexuality or bisexuality, because the animals themselves don't put any sort of label to it, they simply enact their sexual instincts in whichever way they see fit (the nuances of this obviously vary from species to species, there are animals that mate with hundreds of their kind and animals that only mate with one for their whole life). i was going to have a whole section here going into the supposed differences between humans and animals and explaining why homosexuality is a human prerogative as far as we know, but i don't think this is all that relevant: ultimately, humans are the only ones who have, through complex historical and social developments, come up with words to describe sexual and romantic categories, and for whom these categories matter in the context of systematic oppression and liberation. is the lion who wants to roll around in the savannah grass with another lion instead of a lioness a homosexual? no, because there is no language for homosexuality in lion society, and there is no hierarchy systematically depriving lions who don't like lionesses of their rights, or vice versa.

going back to your original question of what about the same gender attracts a homosexual that is not found in the other gender: it is very much a combination of factors, including the ones you dismissed as "impossible", so i am going to try to walk you through it. i believe everyone has an aesthetic judgement of other people, and that includes immediate aesthetic attraction: i can see someone who i read as a beautiful man or someone i read as an ugly woman, and this is all to do with my aesthetic tastes and very little to do with my sexual attraction to men or women. the attraction comes into play then, when i consider the whole of a person's demeanour: a woman i may find very beautiful might be extremely feminine or extremely masculine, and that will not attract me because i am not really attracted to hyperfeminine or hypermasculine women; a woman i don't find beautiful may have a gender presentation i resonate with and find attractive, and that will make me attracted to her.

obviously, though, my immediate read of a situation isn't always accurate: i might see a butch woman i find very attractive and then find out she's actually a man (maybe he's trans, very often he's just a cis guy with facial traits i instinctively read as female), and while i will still find him very aesthetically beautiful i am aware that he is off my plate and as such i am no longer attracted to him or i don't consider him a potential sexual partner anymore; vice versa, if i see a very beautiful man i am not attracted to and then find out he's actually a woman (maybe she's trans, maybe she's a cis woman with facial features i instinctively read as male), it doesn't mean i am instantly attracted to her, but she is now suddenly on my plate, so i am more likely to develop an attraction to her or consider her a potential sexual partner.

of course, we can't deny the presence of biological sex in this context: some people are exclusively attracted to cis male bodies, and some only to cis female bodies (this is a generalization of course, as no two cis bodies look the same, but it is a generalization that some people do make and so it is important to acknowledge it). i believe this is a preference worth unpacking and interrogating, because it is a product of our society just like every other part of our identity, and our society is a transphobic one: am i organically repulsed by penises or vulvas or breasts or flat chests, or is this a repulsion i feel towards a perceived mismatch between sex and gender that society has told me shouldn't exist? to be clear, this isn't just about transgenderism, but it applies to many preferences, especially the ones that reflect a social disparity: attraction to whiteness or thinness, to name two off the top of my head, need to be similarly deconstructed, which doesn't mean giving up any and all preferences one might have, but simply understanding what implicit biases lie below what may seem to us as a harmless preference. and of course, it goes without saying that our sexual preferences, however harmless or harmful, shouldn't impact other people's right to exist in their bodies as they best see fit, nor should they impact the level of respect we show others.

ultimately, it is important to remember that everything in us is dictated by the world we live in: i currently navigate the world as a homosexual woman, for whom attraction to other homosexual women is very important. i don't wholly feel comfortable in my occupying the category of woman: i know that i can transition and start navigating the world as a heterosexual man, but that would remove homosexual women from my potential sexual partners and introduce heterosexual women, and this would cause me a lot of discomfort, so i choose to shoulder the lesser discomfort of being a homosexual woman as opposed to the major discomfort of being a heterosexual man. sociosexual labels allow me to simplify and simulate a process of interaction with the world in a manner other than what i am used to experiencing: within my private life i don't have to be a woman or a man or any social category for that matter, but in a social context where such labels are important if not required i try to strike a balance of the things that will make me most comfortable interacting with others or that will bring me closest to my inner self-perception, a balance that is eternally in flux and in change as the way i move through the world evolves.

[elbiotipo]

What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

Honestly? I have no idea. The answer to your questions could take whole books. Indeed they must have.

I actually don't understand what makes sexuality or gender, on its current definitions, work. I doubt we will ever get a single answer. For sure there is an inborn component to it, I have gay friends who have told me they had same-sex crushes from kindergarter. I also don't think one can't discount cultural or enviromental developments. I'm not sure, for example, how strong my own same-sex attraction is, but I know I wouldn't have even considered it if I didn't know about the possibility (many people on my own friend circle don't even understand how something such as bisexuality exists). I don't believe sexuality or gender can be defined in "boxes" or even clear cut identities. I have a lesbian friend who tells me she has lots of men who are 'an exception' to her, I've met people who cross-dress without thinking of themselves as transgender, or a trans man who considers his life as a woman as just another phase and dislikes the "deadname" concept.

From a purely biological evolutionary perspective, I think that sexuality, as in, sex for pleasure, is a bonding activity. It's a parallel of what surged in lion prides or cat colonies "why fight when we can love instead", except humans were descended from social beings, so sexuality was inherent to us. As for gender, despite obvious anatomical differences, humans are rather similar between biological sexes, we really don't have that much differences beyond those found culturally. We are more like wolves than lions in that aspect.

As humans are cultural beings and we take what we find in nature and process it into abstract terms, we have created a large "structure", is that the right word? around gender and sexuality, among different cultures and times. I don't believe there is a single correct way to interpret such things, only that it seems inherent to us, obviously, as biological beings to seek sex for procreation and also for pleasure and social bonding, and from there all the complexity arises.

I don't want to say most humans are "pan/bi" because that makes no sense, but I will say that people seem to be inborn with certain preferences to a biological sex or another, but that those traits are more flexible than we think, and that they can be changed to a certain extent by cultural and enviromental factors.

I'm sure there are authors that have explored these topics better than me.

[quodekash]

Statistically, there are probably more people who are queer than studies show, even compared to recent studies. 

Sexuality is a spectrum. Gender is a spectrum. It’s often impossible to know precisely where you are on that spectrum, but you can find a place that feels like it’s probably right, and go with that until it doesn’t work anymore. 

There’s also the fact that there are people who are probably marked down “straight” on these surveys and stuff, despite that label not actually being the one that is true for them, possibly due to not being Out yet, or due to internalised homophobia and/or transphobia - whether intentional or unintentional - thence the results are rendered unreliable. 

And we don’t know what it’s like to be in someone else’s mind. We have no knowledge of what attraction feels like, of what gender feels like, outside of ourselves and the descriptions others can give to us (and those descriptions are often faulty, confusing, inaccurate, due to them not knowing precisely what it is that needs describing - because they’ve never been in anyone else’s mind). One person might consider themselves straight their whole life, not knowing that the feelings they feel for the same sex are beyond platonic. 

So the results of so many of these statistics could be wrong, and we’ll never know, because we don’t know what it’s like to be inside someone else’s mind, we can’t understand precisely how someone else works and functions and who they are, because it’s so intricate and it’s impossible to know from an outsider’s perspective. People could spend their entire lives not knowing that the label they have for themselves isn’t the one that describes who they are as a person. 

But that’s also what’s so wonderful about the gender and sexuality identity spectrums. We can put a label (or not, if we don’t want to) on what we think it is that we feel and identify with on the inside, whether we know how others with that label feel or not. Someone’s pronouns might fit the description of a particular label, yet they identify with a different label - and sometimes no label at all. Pronouns and gender identity, although often linked, are not the same thing. The way I see it - and this is not the same for everyone, this is merely my personal view on it - pronouns are how you refer to yourself and how you would like others to refer to you, whereas gender is who you are. And for a lot of people, those are the same thing. But for others, they’re completely different. And that’s okay. 

Humans are so complex and have so many layers and sides and pieces that it’s impossible to find that one word that describes us and our identity entirely, without it ever changing. But we can find something and say “I vibe with this. This is what I am.” And we can even find another thing, realise we vibe with that, too, and just add it to our identity. Or we can find another thing and realise we vibe with it more than the first thing, and what’s so amazing about that is we can just drop the first one. It might’ve left some permanent stains on who you are now, but you don’t have to stick with it forever, you can find something new and use that instead. 

And a lot of the time you might not know what you vibe with. You might keep picking one thing up, realise it’s not right, drop it, pick up a different thing, but that doesn’t feel right too. The beautiful thing is we can make our own things to pick up if we want to. We can decide we don’t vibe with anything already existing, and create our own thing. We can decide we don’t vibe with anything, but we don’t need to, so we just stop picking things up, and don’t have anything to label what’s inside us. 

It’s all so complex and complicated and there’s so much to everything, and there’s no way to know for sure if we have the “right” label. But that doesn’t matter. We can find what feels good, and stick with that. We can change it, we can drop it, we can add to it. There are no rules in any of this. We are people and people weren’t made to fit in boxes. 

(It’s like calling someone sporty because they play cricket. Although those are often two things linked with each other, there are a million and one cases where someone could play cricket and enjoy it, but not see themselves as a “sporty” person. But they also could see themselves as a sporty person, despite only playing one sport. Everyone has their own points of view and perspectives and ideas on who they are and what they can be, and that’s amazing) 

[snugglyporos]

This is probably going to sound like a really weird question, but since it's June, are any of the Poros under the lgbtq+ umbrella?

// Well I see you've decided to offer me a landmine for breakfast today, thanks for that.

I joke, I joke, it's more that this question is very complicated because of how poros are? And how poro society is? So let me see if I can explain this.

Things like 'gender' and 'sexuality' are often constructs of the society we live in; they're human things. Poros... do not have sexuality by their nature. Poros do not have sexual organs, and in my formulation, do not even use proper nouns or names in their language unless a poro decides to do it. Which means that there's a lot less concrete stuff in terms of how it all would work?

Poros do not really understand the human issues with accepting lgbtq+ stuff; poros love poros, poros love humans, poros love snax, poros love lots of things, and it's not a problem. So why would it be a problem for a human to love another human? The complex morality and sexuality problems that come into play in the minds of humans do not even occur to poros. If a poro wishes to love another poro, and that poros is receptive, then there is no issue. But then, poros are mostly love, so it's hard to explain hard lines that exist in other cultures.

The other thing is that, well, poros just kinda are. Here's what I mean. I mostly use he/him as the pronouns of most of the poros, simply because it's easier; but you might be familiar with Punky, who is very clearly a she/her. The thing is, there are lots of ways that in our own society, this could create some issues, or lines of fault. We would ask questions like 'were they born female, thus cis? were they born male, and thus now trans?' ect.

But Poros do not exist like this. Punky is Punky, she is she, and thus she is so, and the poros do not mind or question this. Punky is Punky, and that's as much as poros think to question it.

To put it like this: lets say the Poro King, who has thus far been always identified as male, decided that in reality, they felt that they were female. That they were always that way, and that they wished to be the Poro Queen and identified as such.

The poros would have no issue with this, but more to the point, the Poro King would then be the Poro Queen without any indication that they were ever anything but.

I mean, they might not have the mustache, I guess. But all the rest of the things, the crown and boots and cape, would still be there. Would still be the biggest and most snuggly poro. Would still be filled with the most love!

But so far I have mostly been talking about trans issues (and poros absolutely believe in trans rights btw), but that's because it's really hard to explain to poros the concept of dividing 'heterosexual' love and 'homosexual' love. Poros are poros, love each other, and do not think anything of sexuality because poros do not have sexual organs.

Thus, if two male identifying poros were filled with love, snuggled, and their wool created a new baby poro, this would not be strange to any of the poros. Furthermore, if Punky or another female identifying poro did this, this also would not cause any issues to the poros.

In fact, the hardest part of poros understanding lgbtq issues is that, well, you would have to explain that m/f, m/m, and f/f, are all different things to humans. Because they aren't to poros. Poros think love is love, and that's the extent that they think about it.

I think the easiest way to explain this is that poros are too simple to have the sort of dynamics that make lgbtq+ things exist in our human societies, because poros do not have concepts of sex and gender in the same way humans do. So it's hard to explain pride about, say, lesbians or gay men, because poros would not consider this to be strange or even different from any other kind of love. Because again, poros are mostly love, and love is love, so all the distinctions do not make sense to them.

Keep in mind, poros would 100% humans identifying however they like. But it's basically impossible to place the concept of how we see sex and gender onto poros, because in my understanding of poros, poros lack both sex and gender as a concept. Poros are poros, in the poro's mind, they identify however they like, they love whomever they want to love, and that's that.

Arguably, you would have a harder time explaining to poros that to humans, some kinds of love are bad, or that some humans think certain people shouldn't be allowed to love certain others, because that would be so alien to poros as to be considered evil in and of itself.

I've probably not made much of this clear? But it's not an easy question to answer because I consider poros to almost have alien-like society entirely separate from human understanding of societies.

[resonancebooks]

The Psykrie Species

P H Y S I C A L F O R M

+ CROWN - A crown of psionically sensitive keratin-encased filament structures, weaving backward from the central eye. Paired with “horns” of elaborate shapes, oriented at protecting the vulnerable back and sides of the head. These filaments are not retractable, but can be deactivated at will. While active, they provide constant defense against psionics, even during sleep.

+ TORSO - Back - Upon nearing adulthood, psykrie spines erupt from the back like adult teeth (painful), creating a super-hard pseudo-exoskeleton - Tentacles - Extend from and retract into tiny holes in these ridges. The more ridges / tentacles, the better. These tentacles can vary in length from 6-15 feet, and while weak, are prehensile. Functions -

Sense of taste, “tasting” the wind and potential food sources for toxins or impurities

Directly correlated in telekinetic capacity (locomotive and manipulative). They would move, vibrate, or glow during usage.

Communication, visual and stridulatory.

+ LIMBS - The psykrie have over time evolved to lean into their psionics more than they used to, but they still have weak limbs from the time when they were more necessary. Now they are used primarily in emergencies, when resting psionically, or for cultural rituals. They are thin, skeletal, wispy, and weak. During puberty, the joints of the arms and hips become detachable, primarily during strong usage of psionics. Both joints are cut off into points with the prior point of connection being covered in psionic flow markings. The detached limb can be extended psionically to great lengths, connected to the upper limb with threads of psionic energy. ALTERNATE: The detached limbs are actually a technological advancement, they amputate their own limbs and use technology to enhance their telekinesis and keep the limbs bound via psionic energy. For the same functions above. - Vestigial Features - As psykrie evolved as amphibious creatures, they have some vestigial features from life underwater. Their hands are webbed and they have fish-like scales on their joints and around their back spines.

+ SKIN - Their skin is similar to that of a frog in composition, very soft and moist and designed to prevent water loss. It’s coloration is usually grey, white, or brown as a base with tints of pale / desaturated green, blue, red, purple, or yellow. The pale tints come from symbiotic

O R G A N S A N D F U N C T I O N S

+ STRIDULATORY ORGAN - Hauntingly beautiful noise-making organs or appendages creating a whale-like call - a complex interspersing of Psionics communication with stridulation calls. Filaments are attached to an external gland right behind the ears that excretes a substance that triggers a chemical reaction on the filaments. That combined with vibrating the filaments creates the call. Used in their language, and also involved in mating calls.

+ VOICE BOX - Their speech is made up of dolphin like clicks and whines. When combined with their stridulation and psionics, this makes up their language.

R E P R O D U C T I O N / L I F E C Y C L E

+ SEX / GENDER -

Male - he/him/his/himself

Female - she/her/hers/herself

Intersex- ve/ver/vis/verself

Sex - All psykrie are born intersex, but physically lean more towards males in appearance.

All psykrie have both a proto-penis and a womb, one of them developing and/or regressing during mating. Sex only exists during reproduction, and is chosen at will. Each poly-group chooses who is to produce the seed and who is to receive it.

Gender - Gender is determined by psionic categories rather than sexual alignment. “Gender” as a social role, prior to reproduction, is determined more by a class, caste, career, function, or even personally chosen aspects. Prior to reproduction, with everyone being sexless, our understanding of gender serves no purpose. Essentially, pronouns align with sex but “gender” (as in “man” or “woman”) is replaced with the individual’s social role, described later.

Mating - Intercourse involves insertion of the male’s tentacles on the back into the front torso slit of the female. These tentacles weave themselves through the psychic veins of the other, temporarily “melding minds” with the other in a moment of extreme vulnerability and intimacy. The tentacles are not genitals themselves, this is just a form of intimate embrace.

Gestation - After fertilization, the female carries several eggs for a time before transferring the eggs to another female. The eggs are passed around and each new carrier contributes eggs of their own. This communal pregnancy lasts roughly 6 months. Gestation CAN happen between just two individuals but carries more risks and is culturally inappropriate.

Birth - The final female to carry the eggs births them at around 6 months, and the eggs are kept in water for another 6 months until they hatch. At birth, psykrie are roughly half the size of a human infant.

+ DIET / NUTRITION - Omnivore (Meat, Blood, Fruit, Leaves, Nectar, Seeds, Pollen, Plant Fluid) || Tropovore (Atmospheric Gases)

The symbiote on their skin consumes atmospheric gas in substitute of sunlight, meaning the psykrie would be motivated to move toward these clouds to feed those symbiotes.

Their diet is a combination of:

Fluids from a certain plant as a secondary water source (think coconuts, the plant filters out toxins in water, making it easy and safe to drink, as well as contributing certain nutrients.

Rocks are dissolved in the liquid to add minerals

Invasive / parasitic plants and fungi / fungal spores that grow on and eat away at psionic presences.

Herbivorous - They forage for various types of plants that are essential to their diet.

Mucivore / Nectarivore - fluids from certain plants as a secondary water source (think coconuts, the plant filters out toxins in water, making it easy and safe to drink, as well as contributing certain nutrients. They could dissolve certain rocks in the liquid to add minerals).

Fructivore - the fruits of these same plants would also be thirst-quenching as well as nutritious.

Carnivorous - They do eat meat for the assumed purposes, but they usually hunt and seek out certain animals that have high concentrations of [name thing] in their blood, the chemical element/protein that fuels and enhances connection to the psionosphere.

Sanguinivore - They consume the blood of [name thing]-intense animals and plants for nutrition, energy, and in cultural rituals.

S E X U A L D I M O R P H I S M

Males / Intersex

More Tentacles - increased telekinetic abilities

Smaller Spinal Ridges - increased flexibility

Numerous / Subtler Markings - ornamentation and increased camouflage

Larger / Flexible Stridulation Organs - allows for more complex ranges of audio calling, useful during hunting and scouting, mating calls. More/longer strands/filaments, more sensitive.

Simpler Crowns - decreased psionic defense

Smaller / Slender - aids in dexterity and camouflage, prettier, average of 5’8”, elongated neck

Function - hunting, gathering, scouting, risk-taking, reproduction, child-rearing, and audio communication

More Eyes - Can have 6-10 eyes. Usually wider/longer to increase range of vision.

Slit Womb - Has a slit beginning at their neck and ending at their groin, which leads to the womb. In males, it is thinner and less pronounced.

Females

Less Tentacles - decreased telekinetic abilities

Larger Spinal Ridges - increased physical defense

Less / Obvious Markings - ornamentation and display of psionic capability, hostile threat deterrent

Smaller / Stiffer Stridulation Organs - more intimidating calls, useful during physical defense, higher focus on psionics. Single strand/filament, shorter, less sensitive.

Complex Crowns - increased psionic defense

Larger / Stocky - aids in physical defense, impressive, intimidating, average of 6’5”, shorter neck

Function - protection, construction, reproduction, child-rearing, leadership, intuition

Less Eyes - Can have 4-8 eyes. Usually smaller and more concentrated toward the front

Slit Womb - Has a slit beginning at their neck and ending at their groin, which leads to the womb. In females, it is wider and the flesh of it is swollen (in place of mammaries.).

Both

Shared Burden of Advertisement

Shared / Communal Child-Rearing

Chromatophore Camouflage

Variation Between Individuals: Eye Color; Crown Shape + Number of Crown Filaments; Skin Color; Spinal Ridge Shape; Size / Height / Bioluminescent Markings

Neither are especially violent. The females can be fiercely protective, and the males are responsible for hunting. Violence is not unheard of but is not as pronounced as Earth animals and humans.

D I S P O S I T I O N

+ PSYCHOLOGY: WIP

+ SOCIOLOGY: WIP

+ SUBCULTURES: WIP

+ SOCIAL ROLES:

Eter’Rey || DISCIPLE “Dawn Seeker” Eter - Seeker / Search / Searcher Rey - Child / Youth / Beginning / Origin / Dawn

Students and apprentices, anyone in training for a primary role.

Psy’Hi || SCHOLAR “Knowledge Giver” Psy/Psi - Knowledge Hi - Gift / Give / Giver

Researchers, scientists, educators.

Den’Pho || PROTECTOR “Servant Protector” Den - Servant Pho  - Safe / Guard / Protect / Nourish

Protectors are taught more philosophy and persuasive logic than forceful combat. Even so, as a protector, they are highly trained in psionic and physical incapacitation or even killing.

Ix’Den || PROVIDER “Our Servant” Ix - Us / We / Our Den - Servant

Those who harvest and provide food and ANY other consumer product. Only one word for this category because the most important pursuits culturally are those of the mind, therefore the language reflects this in having far more distinctions for types of abstract roles than practical/physical roles.

Pho’Eir || NOURISHER “Life Guard” Pho - Safe / Guard / Protect / Nourish Eir - Blood / Life-Force / Essence (Physical)

Medical personnel, physical / physiological healing, physical health and safety.

Ash’Eter || SAGE “Wise Seeker” Ash - Guide / Thinker / Philosopher / WiseEter - Seeker / Search / Searcher

Philosophers, thinkers, religious leaders, counselors, spiritual guides of all kinds.

Kul’And || SEER “Watching Eye” Kul - Eye And- Watcher / Watch

Those with psychometry, high intuition. Often take on prophetic roles. Also work as scouts and spies.

Sol’Aur || ARCHITECT “Deep Soul” Sol - Deep/Depths/Abyss/Chasm/Rift Aur - Will / Mind / Self / Soul

Creatives, anyone who produces art of any form.

Val’Ruul || CREATOR “Entity Creator” Val - Separate / Entity / Individual Ruul - Birth / Creation

Reproducer. Reproduction is called “Genesis”.

Bak’Xi / Bak’Ti || MATRIARCH / PATRIARCH “Leading Mother/Father” Bak - Decider / LeaderXi - Matriarch / Mother

Leader, ruler, respected elder. Does not correlate to sex/gender, the differentiation is between the associated themes:

Matriarchs - “Mothers” are physically nourishing and provide structure and safety, the foundation of all else. They teach you to protect and nourish yourself as you grow. Mother / Mom = “Xi” (zhee or shee) or “Xixi” casually. Formal usage adds “xi” to the end of the individual’s name.

Patriarchs - “Fathers” provide spiritual guidance and encourage creativity and expression, helping Father / Dad = “Ti” (tee) or “Titi” casually. Formal usage adds “ti” to the end of the individual’s name.

Aur’Trem || RAVAGER “Soul Breaker” Aur - Will / Mind / Self / Destroyer Trem - Ravager / Destroyer / Breaker

Criminals, the violent, the irredeemable, the destroyers, the undesirables. Name describes them as morally and spiritually bankrupt, the worst thing their culture feels you can be. Moral and ethical crimes are nearly as serious as harm-based crimes.

That's what I have so far!

[joanshan]

Men, Rise!

A long, long time ago, when the light of human consciousness was still undimmed, there existed a balance between genders. The males and females on this planet intuitively knew their part in the plan (though not necessarily in the way we think of gender roles today). Women were the portals of life and the carriers of spiritual wisdom and guidance, and men were the guardians and protectors. The work of women was truly sacred. Men sought women’s guidance in all decision-making, and in return, they created a safe place for women to do their work.

Today the world evolved to greater complexity in terms of genders and the roles we take on. However, our core original gifts are still within us – women still bring life to the planet and as such, have a stronger connection to spirit and a deeper understanding of the value of life, and men are still built to guard and protect. This, however, applies to the two genders in general and does not obligate every individual to follow a specific path. For example, a woman choosing to serve in the army and never have children should be respected and honored, but it does not negate the broader energetic makeup of the genders.

Recently, a YouTube video triggered within me a memory of the sacred role of men and the deeply powerful safe space that they can create for women within any relationship, a space, in which the women can exhale and feel empowered and uplifted. This, I thought, is what men can truly offer women – a profoundly safe space, not only physically, but mentally, and emotionally.

And yet… at no time in recorded human history did men (collectively) make women (collectively) feel truly safe. Instead, there was a systematic dismantling of the women’s sense of value and safety. Over the centuries, women were stripped of their identity as the spiritual navigation system of humanity and prevented from engaging in their sacred duties. Women lost the ability to manage their lives and were required to be obedient to their male counterparts. Women were denied participation in social and political systems and had to rely on men to shape their lives. Women were stripped of financial independence and were forced to be fully dependent on their male family members. Women were used by men for pleasure and then shamed for it and forced to bear sole responsibility for any consequences. Women lost the ability to control their biological functions and to make choices about the timing and direction of their lives. Women were held responsible for the physical, emotional, and sexual violence that was done to them and had little opportunity for escape. The list can go on and on…

Today’s women learned to keep themselves safe in many different ways – they use martial arts, walk in groups, carry pepper sprays, promote code phrases that can allow one to escape unwanted and potentially violent attention in a public place, and so on. And you may shake your head and think, “poor women,” but let’s be clear, the consequences of the way that women in our world are made to feel are profound for all of us, extending to the entire humanity.

Imagine that a person engages in self-harm (cutting, for example), but only cuts the left arm, always leaving the right arm free of physical scars. You would probably agree that the experience of self-mutilation would affect the whole person regardless of which part of the body was cut. In the same way, when one half of humanity harms the other, the entire humanity feels the pain whether it realizes it or not. When the spiritual guides and wisdom keepers of the species are treated as no more than mommas at a baby mill, the consciousness of the entire planet suffers, and without a strong spiritual guidance system, all of humanity is bound to wander about without finding its path.

We are at a point in human evolution when the consequences of the imbalance between genders (regardless of one’s sexual orientation or individual job preferences) are coming to the surface. We must heal this imbalance so we can move forward as a species, so it is time to remember who women are and what they represent. Men, rise and answer your divine call to be the guardians of humanity. Honor women for their wisdom and their power. Realize that as portals of life women are not only seeded with respect for it, they also carry an innate understanding of how to manage its flow. Rise, men, and use your beautiful strength to create a safe place for women.

Source: Men, Rise!

[awakenedhypnosis17]

Men, Rise!

A long, long time ago, when the light of human consciousness was still undimmed, there existed a balance between genders. The males and females on this planet intuitively knew their part in the plan (though not necessarily in the way we think of gender roles today). Women were the portals of life and the carriers of spiritual wisdom and guidance, and men were the guardians and protectors. The work of women was truly sacred. Men sought women’s guidance in all decision-making, and in return, they created a safe place for women to do their work.

Today the world evolved to greater complexity in terms of genders and the roles we take on. However, our core original gifts are still within us – women still bring life to the planet and as such, have a stronger connection to spirit and a deeper understanding of the value of life, and men are still built to guard and protect. This, however, applies to the two genders in general and does not obligate every individual to follow a specific path. For example, a woman choosing to serve in the army and never have children should be respected and honored, but it does not negate the broader energetic makeup of the genders.

Recently, a YouTube video triggered within me a memory of the sacred role of men and the deeply powerful safe space that they can create for women within any relationship, a space, in which the women can exhale and feel empowered and uplifted. This, I thought, is what men can truly offer women – a profoundly safe space, not only physically, but mentally, and emotionally.

And yet… at no time in recorded human history did men (collectively) make women (collectively) feel truly safe. Instead, there was a systematic dismantling of the women’s sense of value and safety. Over the centuries, women were stripped of their identity as the spiritual navigation system of humanity and prevented from engaging in their sacred duties. Women lost the ability to manage their lives and were required to be obedient to their male counterparts. Women were denied participation in social and political systems and had to rely on men to shape their lives. Women were stripped of financial independence and were forced to be fully dependent on their male family members. Women were used by men for pleasure and then shamed for it and forced to bear sole responsibility for any consequences. Women lost the ability to control their biological functions and to make choices about the timing and direction of their lives. Women were held responsible for the physical, emotional, and sexual violence that was done to them and had little opportunity for escape. The list can go on and on…

Today’s women learned to keep themselves safe in many different ways – they use martial arts, walk in groups, carry pepper sprays, promote code phrases that can allow one to escape unwanted and potentially violent attention in a public place, and so on. And you may shake your head and think, “poor women,” but let’s be clear, the consequences of the way that women in our world are made to feel are profound for all of us, extending to the entire humanity.

Imagine that a person engages in self-harm (cutting, for example), but only cuts the left arm, always leaving the right arm free of physical scars. You would probably agree that the experience of self-mutilation would affect the whole person regardless of which part of the body was cut. In the same way, when one half of humanity harms the other, the entire humanity feels the pain whether it realizes it or not. When the spiritual guides and wisdom keepers of the species are treated as no more than mommas at a baby mill, the consciousness of the entire planet suffers, and without a strong spiritual guidance system, all of humanity is bound to wander about without finding its path.

We are at a point in human evolution when the consequences of the imbalance between genders (regardless of one’s sexual orientation or individual job preferences) are coming to the surface. We must heal this imbalance so we can move forward as a species, so it is time to remember who women are and what they represent. Men, rise and answer your divine call to be the guardians of humanity. Honor women for their wisdom and their power. Realize that as portals of life women are not only seeded with respect for it, they also carry an innate understanding of how to manage its flow. Rise, men, and use your beautiful strength to create a safe place for women.

Source- Discover the power within as men rise to their true potential. Explore the transformative journey of self-discovery and empowerment.

[genderqueerpositivity]

I've been thinking about that post I shared the other night about how genderqueer is a misunderstood and ignored identity...and the reason really is the queerphobia.

There are, and have been for as long as I've been active in the community, people who are very against the existence of genderqueer as an umbrella term.

Genderqueer used to be the most common umbrella term for gender identities outside of the binary and for all forms of gender nonconformity. It's on this website that I really watched that change, and it changed because of people who were anti-queer and who didn't want to be associated with queerness.

I was reminded of this not too long ago, when I went searching for the original post where the first nonbinary flag was created. The nonbinary flag was created in February 2014, and I made this blog during that same week as a response to the anti-queer attitudes on this website around that time.

The nonbinary flag was created by a person who was against genderqueer as the umbrella term, because genderqueer was too "political" and contains a "slur".

The flag creator went so far as to claim that it was a "myth" that genderqueer was ever an umbrella term.

No, really: here's the post. (And for those who have never seen it, here is the original nonbinary flag post.)

Queerphobia is the reason that genderqueer identity is ignored and misunderstood. That, and the fact that most people are completely unaware of the history and origin of the term.

And it's kind of bizarre, because it's recent-in-my-life-time-history and I'm not even 30.

Genderqueer was coined in the 90s, and the person who coined the term is still alive and has a twitter account and blogs??

GenderQueer: Voices From Beyond the Sexual Binary was published almost 20 years ago. (And is now in re-print, so one no longer has to hunt down a used copy anymore!!)

And yet the general attitude is that genderqueer is a new invention. And the same folks seem to believe that the reclamation of queer is a brand new idea and not a deliberate action that has already been taken by countless queer people for decades.

Genderqueer does function as a specific gender identity label, and it is one of the many labels I use for myself. This isn't the original usage of the term, but one that has developed since it's creation.

Genderqueer is an umbrella term, a very large umbrella term, and this is by design; it is intended to encompass every form of transness, every kind of gender nonconformity, every complex and creative gender identity, and every queer experience of marginalization based upon gender and sex.

The definitions that I see attributed to the word genderqueer are usually far more narrow than that, including simplified definitions that I myself have given the word so that it would be easier for others to understand; the way that the term is used today is not how it used to be used, which is kind of disappointing actually. No other word that we have functions in that way, as a broad and proud banner for all queer people who are marginalized because of gender and sex.

Perhaps the broad inclusiveness of the term is why it's grown so unpopular.

[nocapesdahling]

As the World Falls Down - Chapter 1

Helmut Zemo x Gender Neutral Reader

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Summary: You are the head of Research and Development for your squad in Sokovia and also serve as its handler. Your leader is the esteemed Colonel Helmut Zemo, your best friend though you’ve often sometimes wished that it could be more than that.

Rating: Mature (17+)

There is currently no explicit sexual content planned for this fic, but there may be things heavily implied as we move forward so rating it M to be safe. Please respect the rating.

Chapter Warnings/Tags: Slow Burn; Canon pairing of Heike Zemo/Helmut Zemo; implied potential polyamory; Zemo likes to be called Sir; Referenced Age Difference; Angst will be coming in subsequent chapters.

A/N: Hi everyone! Helmut Zemo and this idea would not leave me alone. This is my first reader fic and my first fic published on Tumblr, so I would love to hear what you think. This will be a multi-chapter fic, covering Age of Ultron, Civil War, and TFATWS. The first three chapters will cover AOU. Zemo and everyone in this chapter are speaking Sokovian, but it's written in English. It is assumed that the reader’s nickname exists in the Sokovian alphabet.

Chapter 1: Beneath a Fallen Sky (Age of Ultron) - Part 1

Word Count: 3k

Chapter Summary: Everything was normal. Well as normal as it could be in the day in the life of a handler for a Sokovian covert intelligence squad when robots began to attack Novi Grad and things…well, things went downhill from there.

You had met Baron Helmut Zemo years ago, though you hadn’t known he was a baron back then, in what felt like another life and had been by his side ever since. You served as the tech wizard and handler for his team of EKO Scorpions, outfitting them with gadgets, designing their suits and masks, and acting as tech support for their missions. Zemo had jokingly referred to you as Q when you presented him with his purple mask for the first time and to your slight embarrassment it had stuck. No one on the team had called you anything else since.

Now, machines had attacked Novi Grad and you had to do something for Sokovia, for her people. You tried hacking the machines to no avail. You’d get into one and then it would fall over lifeless as though it never worked in the first place. The algorithm was constantly changing and the AI was too complex without your specially designed work equipment, which was currently in your base miles outside the city and not your apartment, so it was time for plan B.

You focused on getting your people out of the city and saving as many civilians as possible. A swarm of robots attacking seemed like something that would attract the attention of the Avengers, but they weren’t here yet and you couldn’t sit idly by waiting for them to arrive. You called the members of your team and reached almost all of them. They were stationed around the city, doing their parts to help civilians as covertly as possible. Your team was not used to doing anything without their masks, which you did not tend to bring home, but this was an extraordinary situation so you would all do what you must.

You had reached everyone, except Helmut. He wasn’t picking up via his phone or his earpiece, and you couldn’t help but worry about him and his family. You had all been called to (well, ordered if you were being technical) to defend the city, but your squad wouldn’t function the same without its leader.

You needed Colonel Helmut Zemo.

This was the first time in a long time that you had been out in the field, preferring to be behind the scenes, but you were capable and skilled enough to be there. Zemo had made sure of it.

________________________________________________________________

Flashback:

You were designing an exploding pen in the lull between missions, just for fun, when you registered Helmut’s presence in the room. You had no idea how long he had been standing there as you often got lost in your head, especially while working on a diverting project. Your brain flitted from one thought to the next and fixated on solving different problems or creating new gadgets. The outside world became a blur to you. Helmut’s voice was one of the few things that could draw you out of it. It had been like that since you first met him. Maybe, it was the timbre of his voice that always seemed to reach you even when you were figuratively miles away. His deep voice was so lovely.

“How useful do you think that would be, my Q?” Helmut’s voice was amused and fond.

You turned to face your best friend ready to excitedly tell him the multitude of uses for the exploding pen in the field, when your breath caught in your throat. Sometimes, it took you aback how handsome he was. He was wearing his military uniform today and he looked too attractive in it. It wasn’t even fair.

His hair often fell on his forehead, giving you the urge to brush it away. It was difficult for you to resist the urge to touch that lock of hair and him in general, but you were succeeding so far. Somehow. You gave yourself a metaphorical pat on the back for that. You thought you deserved it.

A man shouldn’t look so good with a gun in his hand either, even if it was one you designed. There was something undeniably sexy about the way Helmut used your gadgets, which took you so much time and effort to make. He took the time to understand them and utilize their full abilities. It made you feel like he was making the effort to understand you.

His smooth and confident motions were also mesmerizing to watch via the screen, while you directed the squad on missions. You had never allowed yourself to get too distracted by him, but acknowledged the beauty of his savagery that he occasionally employed to get the job done.

It was a toss up between which look you liked better, the military uniform or the dark purple sweater and coat he wore for certain missions. You had made sure that his shoulder holsters fit under it and that everything looked smooth. God, you loved how he looked in that coat. (You would also admit to admiring how the shoulder holsters looked on him too).

You took him in. His hands were encased in black leather gloves and his hair was mussed from his mask, but he looked good like always even having just come back from a mission. You took a glance down at his hands.

No blood this time, thank goodness.

You attempted to snap yourself out of it, hoping Helmut wouldn’t notice. Your brain was being particularly uncooperative today, pointing out everything you shouldn’t notice. Your mind was filled with of images of how it would feel for Helmut to caress and handle you the way he did the guns and gadgets you presented to him, what the leather of his gloves would feel like on your bare skin, and how it would feel to trace the multitude of scars you knew he received from missions not just on his chest but all over his body.

Maybe, it was time to find a new romantic partner that Helmut couldn’t scare away. He had intimidated the last one away within minutes of meeting them, and you hadn’t bothered to try to meet someone since.

What was the point when Helmut vetoed them as soon as you introduced them?

Given some of your current thoughts, it was probably time to do something about the lack of romance in your life. With your luck however, they would take one look at Helmut and run for the hills in both a figurative and literal sense. The man was quietly intimidating at the best of times, but when he actually tried he oozed danger. You almost couldn’t blame your possible partner. Meanwhile, when his full focus and attention were on you, you felt flustered and hot in a way you had never felt with anyone else though you attempted not to show it. You thought that you had been rather successful at that, though who could tell with Helmut? The man might have known about your crush on him for ages, but hadn’t said anything to save your pride.

(Helmut did in fact know and found it adorable. He and Heike had once mused about adding you as a third and equal part of their relationship, because both had seen the way you watched them even if you might not have noticed them watching you back. That reminded him that he needed to bring that up with Heike once more when he returned home. He schooled his face to give nothing away before continuing to watch you as you stayed lost in your thoughts. He would coax you out of it soon, but enjoyed watching your face as your brain worked.)

You attempted to shake your thoughts away again, knowing that at this point if Helmut hadn’t noticed your inattention before then he certainly had now. The man was happily married to a wonderful and gorgeous woman, who you adored, and you were his son’s godparent for goodness sake. You might have had a chance at one point years ago. You had thought your friendship might have become something more, but that had been before Helmut had met Heike.

What chance did you have with a Baron, anyway?

Helmut had stepped closer, while you were lost in your musings and reached for your hand. “Where have you gone Q, darling? Have I lost you in your head again?”

You snapped out of it and almost jumped back because of his new proximity. His brown eyes bored into yours with slight crinkles in the corners, showing his joking mood. You shook your head and hoped again that he didn’t notice the reason for your distraction, though you didn’t have much hope. The man noticed everything.

“I was just thinking about the improvements I could make to the exploding pen and how you all could use it on your missions!” you exclaimed, excitement in your voice and face as you spoke of your work. You hoped your enthusiasm would divert him from questioning what had distracted you.

Helmut chuckled softly and played along, “May I?”. He indicated the pen that was still sitting in your hand. His lips were slightly upturned. He knew how passionate you got about your gadgets.

“Of course, Colonel,” you smirked back and handed him the pen. Your hands brushed, the leather of his gloves caressing your palm.

Helmut stepped closer to the light and examined the pen. “I can already think of several uses for this, my Q, though I did happen to notice something about this particular pen.” He turned on his heel and held the pen up for your perusal as though you hadn’t spent the last hour examining and perfecting it. You played along, leaning closer as if to examine the pen. Helmut loved his games, and you had never been anything but a willing participant.

“Hmm?” you made a questioning sound as you straightened your blazer and looked away to avoid eye contact in the hopes that he would come closer with your faux avoidance of his question.

You heard him step nearer, knowing that he could walk silently if he chose and that he wanted you to hear him. “Look at me, my Q. Where has this shyness come from, hmm?” His hand was on your chin, tilting your head up before you could respond.

At some point, when you weren’t looking, he had taken his gloves off and you had to stifle a shiver as his gun calloused warm hand touched the bare skin of your face. A brief thought crossed your mind of what that hand would feel like elsewhere before he let you go, staying a little too close for your piece of mind.

“There you are,” He smiled at you, a full one that was more rare than you would have liked. “Now, Q, you know what I noticed? This pen,” and here he drew your attention back to the pen by playfully flourishing it like the showman he was, “is one of mine. I am the only one on the team that uses this brand. Do you know how much a Mont Blanc costs, darling?”

You shook your head and smiled sheepishly. You knew vaguely that they were expensive, but it was the best kind of pen for this sort of thing so you hadn’t thought twice. “No, but it was the most sturdy pen and I knew that you, Boss, would be the one most likely to use it once it was done. So I thought you wouldn’t mind if I used your pen.”

Internally, you wanted to laugh. You knew that Helmut would not have let another member of the squad get away with some of the stuff you pulled. You were the only one who called him Boss, though you had experimented with calling him Sir like the rest of your squad. That had brought an odd light to his eyes that you had never been able to quite decipher. He had almost looked hungry. You refrained from calling him Sir too often after that, except when you really wanted something or intended to tease him.

Helmut smirked at you as he slipped the pen into his pocket, “I’ll be keeping this, Q. Usual activation, I presume?”

You smiled back, attempting to stop yourself from bouncing up and down on your heels. He and the rest of the squad always praised your gadgets, but it gave you a secret and special sort of thrill to have Helmut’s approval in particular. “Of course, Boss.”

“Now, for the actual reason I came here before we got so delightfully distracted by the products of your brain, you and I are going to the gun range. I happened to notice you haven’t been there in some time, Q.”

“I’ve been busy,” you protested while knowing he wouldn’t buy it, “Being the team’s handler and tech wizard is hard work.”

You had never enjoyed committing violence yourself, so tended to avoid the range, though you had never minded watching Helmut on his solo missions and as he lead the team on group missions. The thought passed through your head again that the man looked sexier than he should in full uniform with a gun in his hand. You shook your head in an attempt to dislodge your thoughts. You weren’t sure where they had come from today, but you wanted them to stop and stop now. You resolved once again to pursue a new relationship. Helmut was your friend and could not be anything more, no matter your fantasies and dreams.

“I know you work hard, darling Q, and that you can handle yourself, but you must practice in case the worst were to happen and we needed you in the field. I know you have the needed patience, my Q, with your line of work, but you must gain the experience. A person can do anything if they have those. You can do anything… I’ve known that ever since I first met you when you were a young student. How many grades did you skip again? Look how much you’ve accomplished and you’re still so young.”

You ignored his question about the grades you had skipped. You had been something of a child prodigy and had been younger than the average grad student. “Yeah, yeah, Boss and you’re such an old man. Also, I’m not that much younger than you. Do you remember our first conversation in the library?”

“Of course, Q. I’ll never forget it, even when I am actually an old man. You got my attention by your book selections. Machiavelli and hmm what was the second one?”

You noticed again that Helmut truly was in a joking mood today. The mission must have gone well. They hadn’t needed you to act as the handler for this one, but you were glad there’d been no mishaps. Sometimes, after a difficult mission, Helmut brought his field persona back to the base. During those instances, his demeanor gave off the impression of a man who would do whatever necessary to accomplish his goals. No matter what was required. You hated to say it, but when he was like that you were a little turned on. (Well, more than a little but you weren’t going there at the moment). 

You had always had a thing for intelligent and ruthless men, which now that you thought about it had started once you met Helmut, and his domineering field persona made you feel hot. You gave up on controlling your thoughts today as that seemed to be a lost cause, and internally sighed. Heike was a lucky woman.

“You’ll never let that one go, will you? It was for my course. Read one German erotic book or two, and no one ever lets you forget it.”

“Or two, my Q? Who said anything about a second one?”

“No one. Not me. Moving on, anyway you think anyone younger than you is young, Helmut. Also, you look younger than your actual age.”

“Yes, I know. Helps for undercover missions.”

“Of course, it does. Did you even need those glasses you were wearing when we met or were they just there to make you look more studious?”

He laughed and gestured for you to lead the way to the range, not answering your somewhat rhetorical question. “Let’s go, Q. I have to see how rusty you’ve gotten. Afterwards, perhaps if you’re good, I will teach you how to wield a sword.”

“Oh I’ll show you how good I can be, Sir.”

End Flashback

_____________________________________________________________

Well, the so-called worst had happened and you were out in the field, facing killer robots of all things. You were working in conjunction with your squad to evacuate and protect neighbors and strangers alike, but it was different being out here as opposed to behind a screen. You had finally been able to reach Helmut, and he had gotten Heike and Carl to safety outside the city with his father on their estate. You had breathed a sigh of relief at that. They would be safe there, and you did not need to worry about them. He had also reported that the Avengers had finally arrived and that they had been able to see them from their car window, which meant that it was time for your squad to finish up and get out of there.

Helmut was elsewhere in the city, and your squad was one of the only ones still in Novi Grad proper, so you were spread thin. Yet you couldn’t help but wish to see Helmut, to embrace him for what could be the last time. You had faith in your squad and the Avengers, but this was your country and your people at stake. That unwavering faith lasted until Novi Grad’s, your home’s, streets began to splinter and the city began to lift from the ground faster than you would have thought possible and no one seemed to be able to stop it, not even “Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.”

[0aurelion-sol0]

Yo~

What's your opinion on the Will Byers DID theory? If you like it, which version do you like better? Both interpretations seem cool to me, though I personally like strangertheory's version better ^.^

Hi!

That's a very interesting question. I want to start by saying that I am a singlet, so I don't have DiD or OSDD. My knowledge of this condition is primarly known through medias I consume or some more "advanced" psychiatric documents or researches.

DiD is a condition that hasn't been always best represented or accurately represented since this condition varies from people who have it and so while there are similarities, the experience of it is very much unique and personal. It is also something that in a fictional setting with different genres, themes and tones is very hard to pull off or represent unless you go for the very realistic take on it.

It is bound to be, like many other things in fiction, dramatized. And speaking from a singlet perspective, who also had particular problems represented in fiction, I think it's okay as long as it's done right, in the setting, tone and genre it is in.

For example, we have today a lot more LGBTQ+ representation and like everything, unless you go for the fully realistic route, it's going to be simplified and dramatized. There's so many gender identities and sexual orientations today, you have to simplify it. And that goes for many other things that people care about in media, it has to be done right, but the writers still have a story to tell and unless that subject is the focus of the story, they're not gonna always spend their time talking about that. There is a story to tell.

Secondly, if it is the main focus of the story, that is where people have to do their research and really represent what they are talking about. Not some half-baked representation with dull arguments and points that come from a capitalist and conservative worldview. (Looking at you Disney.)

Now what you are referencing are @strangertheory 's and @kaypeace21 's theories which are about the show being about a DiD system where we see different alters evolving in said story with the host being Will Byers.

There is a lot of evidence pointing towards it, I'm gonna let you go see their posts and read it.

But their theories are very different in the way that they see the show portraying DiD, I have actually find quite a great way to describe the two takes.

@kaypeace21 's take is that elements of the DiD system have been externalised through science-"fictional" or supernatural means. Similar to Legion from the Marvel universe.

(David is a powerful mutant with DiD where each alters, if I remember correctly, has a different power or powers. (Which to this day is still one of the most BADASS thing I have ever come across though it must be quite terrifying for David.))

@strangertheory is an internalised POV on the DiD system existing in the show. She believes that what we are seeing right now is what is exclusively happening INSIDE the DiD system and that what we are experiencing is not our standard definition of the "real world". As in the physical world we all know. This would be in very vulgar terms happening inside Will's self, head, mind or brain. In a sense, it would be a more accurate representation of what DiD is about. A Shyamalan twist if you prefer.

(Though right now I don't have any word for word examples of such take, there is a show called MR.ROBOT that fits a bit of this description since there are moments in the show that we are seeing are only happening in the DiD system itself.

I recommend this show A LOT. It still is a bit dramatized but from what I know the DiD representation is quite accurate and pleased a lot of people with DiD. Also some people on the Stranger Things crew worked on that show.)

Now do I love the DiD theory ?

Heck yeah, I fucking love it! And with a big L! (Am I right "The First I love you?").

And I Love both of the takes and I think each one works at explaining the mysteries of this story. I even think that in some ways both could work well together.

I believe that DiD can be, without the meaning of being used, like many things a powerful storytelling "device" since it is connected to so many themes and other writing tools and is linked literally to the psyche, emotions and personalities of the characters.

I can understand why some people like both or one or respectfully and logically dislike both or one of the takes. But it is close to my belief about what the show is about or were even before I came into this fandom or on the internet, not as complex and thought out as the theory itself but pretty close in the overall themes and aspects of it.

(Though it bewilders me how much people lack imagination or are scared of such twist when I have seen so many of those types before whether it's done well or not, accurate or not.)

Now both @strangertheory and @kaypeace21 are intelligent people with very nuanced takes. And they had their fair share of completely unjust controversies coming from either rabbid ignorant shippers, far too sensible people or downright ignorant stupid people, most of the time 16 year olds. I am not saying that they are perfect, no one is, but the hate they have received is completely unjust.

And I am gonna lay it down right here, they are begging for an accurate representation here, they are not doing this because it just sounds cool and is edgy, they are actually wanting that The Duffers pull this off well. They would be very mad if they use all the imagery just to make it look cooler or scarier.

They are not bringer of truths, they are just like us. They are theorists, they believe in something that they think can explain the story they love and are experiencing. And so far, they have a pretty damn good track record.

They are analysing, dissecting the show because it's what they want to do and they believe in it and they believe the Duffers wants them to do that (I mean how come no one believes it when watching a show like that set in the 80's with so many references ?).

It is also supposed to be fun. Have fun for God's Sake! You can disagree with it but calling names and being disrespectful because somehow they don't agree with very basic, lazy and cliché theories (and no it's not being hypocrite, a lot of people barely do the work.) or are not on board with your creepy projection over the characters IS not okay.

And no, they aren't supporting p*d*philia as some people have claimed. How can you read these theories and come up to that conclusion ?

Most people haven't even read the DiD theory or have gone all the way through with it because they are lazy, easily bored people who don't have the time to just relax, process and think.

Stranger Things is not a kids show, some dumb teenage romance drama show with cool monsters! It's a very mature show, with real problems that are treated, out of which is trauma and mental health. Kids are killing people and even dying on this show. There is sexism, racism, abuse both physical and psychological.

It is a very mature and dark show. And you are being disrespectful to the Duffers when you say they are not that smart or that isn't that important. They are putting a lot of thoughts into this and the fact that no one really recognises this annoys me.

Or people only think it's important when it is only about the things they enjoy in the show. (Which is more hypocrite to me.) OR people are very stupid if they truly think that or are just jealous, bitter that two women have more imagination together and individualy than all of them or that person alone.

Color and costume choices, subtext, context, camera angles, directing, VFX, music, editing, sets, props, script, acting and editing are very important. All must be carefully done or you get very bad or generic stuff if you don't. If you love and you are passionate about the work, you put all the details you can into it.

And the Duffers and all the people working with them have already referenced those sort of things AND the practice of what we do on the internet. They are aware, they know because they have been in the same place too. They grew up with stories too, they made theories too whether it's on the internet or not.

At the end of the day, it is just a theory. An explanation of what is unfolding, may unfold or may have unfolded. I believe in it, I think it is reasonable, it has logic and it makes sense. It also has a lots of elements backing it up.

And the Duffers don't even have to go with DiD or mention it. Will creating some of the characters and supernatural events from his trauma is also similar and more accessible to the masses. But a Shyamalan twist can also work if it is done well.

And I am also open to other possibilities and theories, if they make sense and have enough elements IN THE SHOW and everything connected to it backing it up.

If the Duffers write something completely different but it is as good and also explains even better than this theory than I'll be okay. I love being wrong, it makes me learn new things and enhances the way I approach stories in the future.

If the Duffers only used this as some very inaccurate and disrespectful scary/abstract subtext without commiting to it. That is where I will have a problem.

Or write something completely incoherent with the rest of the show with a bad plot twist catering to the main public masses to sell the story even more and just make money so that they are safe with a fallacy of a work of fiction. Because they are cowards who didn't know how to manage themselves and baited entire audiences or listened to some crappy executive who didn't understand shit about the story. (wink wink, looking at a certain something...)

So yeah, I do love the DiD theory and both of it's takes and if it happens and is done right, with of course my perspective on the thing and PRIMARLY the perspective of people who have DiD or know a lot about it, I'll be pleased with it and I think it could be something very important for stories, people, the world and "art" in general.

Thank you for the question it was really fun! I hope I described the theory and the condition in the right way @kaypeace21 and @strangertheory and also the people who are concerned or know about it if I didn't let me know. Also, if you disagree with what I said, the way I said it or the subject itself let me also know IF it's respectful of course.

[matchstickdolly]

Lucifer 5B: Cutting off Touch to Spite Your Fans

Spoiler warning: This post assumes you've watched all of Lucifer, season 5, part B.

CW: There's plenty I like about season 5, but this is a negative post. I know not everyone is up for negativity about the things they love. I also generally avoid it and (try to) keep my mouth shut about things I don’t like in most spaces. It’s good etiquette. But this is my space, and I have thoughts specifically about purity culture and the treatment of sexuality and trauma in fiction. You’ve been warned!

---

I'm a professional writer (not in TV). I've worked with enough bad clients, editors, and other writers to recognize some hallmark behaviors in how both Fox and Netflix gave Lucifer's writers incredibly difficult, unfair, and frankly weird situations to create through.

Fox did them dirty, interfering and ordering too many eps in S3. Netflix did them dirty, ordering 10 eps for S4 when it clearly needed ~13. Then Netflix ordered 10 "final" eps for S5—then, just kidding(!), 6 more after they'd done their writing for the 10. (What the fuck?) And then Netflix ordered 10 more for a "final-final" S6 after the writers had done their best to tell their whole story in S5. (MORE what the fuck.)

Talk about whiplash for creators, and half of those who consume content don't even care to understand such creative pain.

So, there are problems on multiple fronts. There's much I'll forgive writers, accordingly. I go into most shows expecting plotting/pacing issues. I look, instead, for characters and relationships that will triumph over those issues.

Heart is what the show Lucifer has always had in spades, both in its characters and in the immensely committed, wonderful ways the actors have tried to realize the characters' humor, love, trauma, and—most importantly—struggle to find healing. Yet, when given the opportunity to show health alongside another in a relationship, the writers/directors of 5B chose to remove most sexual humor and physical intimacy from their female lead and bi/pan characters to, I feel, sanitize them and troll fans. What happened?

Well, for one, say hi to showrunner Joe Henderson bragging about how the writers decided to be colossal dicks to the fans who helped secure their jobs:

From CBR's 'Lucifer Showrunner Joe Henderson Dissects Season 5B's Chaos'

Have we not suffered sidelined/repressed female characters, "bury your gays," and, oh, Chloe fucking a serial killer enough? Must we also say hello to neutered relationships once characters find stable love (whether same or opposite sex)? The result of withdrawing more sexual humor and physical intimacy from paired characters is an uncomfortable suggestion that they're reformed by "pure" love—more chaste and aloof, more acceptable in polite society. This is only done to end-game committed relationships.*

The writers seem to think they're edging the viewers, but the reality is they're taking traumatized minority characters who rejoiced in sexual freedom, but lacked and craved an emotional connection, and showing they can't have both, or, if they find both, it will never last. They've taken hypersexual characters and said, here, even they can have the love and commitment they desire, but some physical intimacy, especially sexual intimacy, is what they must trade for it.

There's always one more case, phone call, or coincidence interrupting intimacy. Traumas or deaths deserving emotional and physical comfort go on to receive none or only one aspect. Done sometimes, it's fine. Done always, it's sick. Dan dies, and there's no hugging? Really?†

Don't craft characters who crave a full range of emotional and physical intimacy, only to rob them of related scenes every chance you get. That's not complexity. That's bad writing. To even achieve this in 5B, they must squash banter and sideline their female lead yet again.

What a gift to purity culture, which tells us to be more palatable by bottling and buttoning up. That sex should be taboo, but violence glorified. That there is no heated desire among "Good Women," that sexual minorities of all genders shouldn't experience it much at all.

5A is so good. At the very least, it's on the right path (clearly, since the plot payoff from 5x01 to 5x16 is great). It shows a couple working through difficulties and trauma, toward each other emotionally and physically. It even pokes fun at people who think an established relationship means the death of romantic and sexual appeal (a tired and hugely sexist trope). And then... And then 5B reverses that, pretending established relationships are barely physical during emotional struggle and that the honeymoon phase doesn't exist. It robs characters of joy and comfort through physical intimacy when they need it to move through or push beyond trauma.

It's telling that so many fan wishes for Deckerstar are about healing touch and existing in each other's spaces: amending Chloe's spicy PDA history with Cain, Chloe caring for Lucifer's wings, soft family scenes a la Monopoly night and shared meals, morning-afters, etc. Reasonable fans aren't asking for porn; they're asking for connection and humanity. They're asking for writers not to forget characters (and, yes, including hypersexual characters) on their way from Point A to Point B.

That 5B lacks these things isn't a "tee-hee frustrating" slow burn or a cockblock. It is, in so many scenes, excising from characters a core part of what nearly every human and fictional monster craves. And it's a slap in the face to the "found family" trope. When you remove or tamp down a casual physical intimacy that was previously there, characters and their relationships fall flat, even if only partially. They become blunt weapons creators wield against watchers or readers begging for scraps of warmth.

Minorities shouldn't be killed off with ease, and they shouldn't be stifled with ease, either.‡ And maybe there shouldn't be deep trauma driving a wedge in a romantic relationship if you're not going to explore it through that relationship, too—physical intimacy included.

I'm still reserving some judgment. I loved the family drama and the end. (Although, again, where was the physical intimacy? No intimacy when Chloe or Lucifer return from the dead? Really?) I see where they could do awesome things, and could have done more if not for network BS.

But I no longer trust Lucifer's writers and directors. They thought S5 was the end. And what they gave us of Deckerstar, of the relationship that symbolizes health and healing in their fictional world, is this: cold distance. And they got a kick out of doing it, apparently.

If this is a "love letter" to me as a fan, I'm burning it. I can only hope S6 course corrects. If not, the writers who made these choices shouldn't write sexual minority and/or traumatized characters again. If you don't understand most of us, you should stop fucking using us.

---

* If you don't believe me about the differences between casual/short-term relationships and end-game relationships in Lucifer, go back and look at how Lucifer and Maze are with strangers in all the other seasons. Look at Chloe's sex dream, her propositioning of Lucifer in a library, her sex with Pierce in the evidence closet. Look at how much physical intimacy there is between Lucifer and Eve, and then between Eve and Maze (if only as a ploy). Across seasons, there are sex/kink jokes and scenes galore.

Compare this to how these same characters are portrayed when with their end-game loves. Notice the gentle pecks on the lips and the huge general drop in sexual humor between 5A and 5B. How boring. Where's the spice these characters had? Also, give me a damn break. Buttoning up in a relationship is contrary to four and a half seasons of emotional character work that's been communicating security in our relationships is personally freeing.

† I'm not just talking about sexual intimacy in this post, though that is a big part of it because of the characters. 5B lacked crucial found family scenes, too.

Chloe should have been at God's family dinner, but being so would have prevented more ham-fisted angst. Chloe never even has a one-on-one with God, probably because that would demand a straight answer about her miracle status, which I would guess will be used to drive yet another wedge between her and Lucifer next season, but we'll see.

In multiple before- and after-work scenes, there was no reason for Lucifer and Chloe to be apart more, even, than they were in S1 and S2. Monopoly night was in S3, for crying out loud. Most horrifying of all? No one touches Chloe after Dan's death, but Trixie. Meanwhile, Linda, Amenadiel, Ella, Maze, and Lucifer all receive physical comfort. No wonder Chloe's tired of being strong.

‡ If you don't think it's offensive that they stuffed all their wlw content for two hypersexual characters into a few clunky, irrational, and chaste scenes that rushed I love yous, a marriage-like proposal, and the mention of soulmates, I don't know what to tell you other than get off my lawn.